#I’ve been having a bad relationship with art so I needed to take a break and make stuff I ACTUALLY wanted to draw

[nanstar200]

Erm what the fri- *gets shot multiple times*

(More info about my comical disappearance in the tags LMAO)

[bambieyedoll]

⋆·˚ ༘ * QUIL ATEARA HEADCANONS 𐚁̸.ᐟ

𐙚 being in a relationship with quil

the golden retriever boyfriend energy is so real. quil is always excited to see you. he could’ve seen you an hour ago and still be like:

“there’s my girl!”

he lifts you off the ground in a hug like you weigh nothing and spins you just to hear you laugh.

he insists on calling you every cute nickname in existence, but most often it’s:

“babe. baby. angel. sweetheart. lovebug. sunshine. hey, you—adorable creature, come here.”

you once tried to count how many different ones he used in a day. you lost track around 27.

he’s super touchy. like, it’s almost comical. his arm is around you at all times. if you’re sitting, you’re on his lap. if you’re standing, his hand is in your back pocket. he has absolutely no sense of personal space with you.

“i just like knowing you’re real,” he shrugs, nuzzling into your neck.

“i’m not gonna disappear, quil.”

“yeah, but you might float away if i’m not holding on tight enough.”

third wheeling with embry and jacob used to be your life. now they third wheel you two. embry’s still salty about it.

“i swear to god, if i see you two cuddling during movie night again, i’m launching popcorn at both of you.”

“that’s fair,” you admit. quil just winks. “totally worth it.”

he gets jealous in the funny way, not toxic—just absolutely dramatic. like if someone even breathes in your direction:

“you saw that, right? he looked at you like you were the last slice of pizza on earth. i will fight him.”

“quil, he asked for the time.”

“exactly. that’s how it starts.”

he loves showing you off to the pack. and he’s got no chill about it.

“isn’t she the prettiest thing you’ve ever seen? like, how is she even real?”

you’re literally in pajamas. eating cereal.

“quil—”

“no. don’t downplay it. you’re art, babe.”

he goes out of his way to cheer you up when you’re sad. one time you had a bad day and he showed up with your favorite snacks, a giant hoodie of his, and said:

“okay, bad mood begone. i brought cuddles, sugar, and a movie where everything explodes.”

he loves cuddling so much it’s actually a problem. you try to get up in the morning and he clings like a koala.

“five more minutes. or fifty. who needs sunlight anyway?”

the wolf thing doesn’t scare you. he was worried it might—but you just looked at him and said:

“so you’re like…hot and supernaturally fast now?”

“well, i’ve always been hot, thanks.”

you just rolled your eyes and kissed him.

he’s obsessed with your laugh. like, actually addicted to it. he’ll do the dumbest stuff just to hear it—wearing socks on his hands, pretending to be a dinosaur, or dramatically reading cereal box labels in shakespearean tones.

“if thou desirest a breakfast with whole grain goodness… behold the blessed cheerio!”

“quil, it’s 7 a.m.”

“and yet i’d rise at dawn each day for the sound of your laughter.”

quil is surprisingly soft-spoken during quiet moments. when it’s just you two, laying under the stars or wrapped up in a blanket on the couch, his voice gets all low and gentle.

“you know i’d do anything for you, right?”

“i know. i’d do anything for you too.”

“good. then keep letting me hold you like this forever.”

he’s constantly offering you his hoodie. like even if you’re already wearing one.

“here, take this one too. layer up. you look so cute when you’re drowning in fabric.”

sometimes he stares at you like he just remembered he loves you all over again. he doesn’t even try to hide it. you’ll be brushing your teeth or tying your shoe and catch him with the softest expression.

“what?”

“nothing. just… how’d i get this lucky?”

you’ve fallen asleep on his chest more times than you can count. he rubs your back, plays with your hair, and always whispers something soft before you drift off.

“sleep, baby. i’ve got you. i’ll always have you.”

when you cry, quil completely breaks inside. he’s not good at holding back his emotions when you’re hurting. his whole face crumples, and he gets down to your level instantly.

“tell me what to do. please. i hate seeing you like this—just tell me how to make it better.”

you’ve patched him up after patrols. he insists it’s no big deal—“just a scratch”—but you can always tell when he’s hiding how bad it hurts.

“you don’t have to baby me.”

“i’m not babying you, i’m loving you. now hold still, tough guy.”

quil gets insanely flustered when you wear something he thinks is cute. it could be a new dress or one of his shirts—either way, he goes red and stumbles over his words.

“you—you can’t just walk around looking like that and expect me to stay calm, okay?”

“but it’s literally your hoodie, quil.”

“exactly. my hoodie. and you make it look illegal.”

when he’s really in love-mode, he blurts things without thinking. like…

“you know i wanna marry you, right?”

cue silence.

“wait. that was—okay, that came out way faster than i meant it to.”

“but do you?”

“…every damn day.”

his imprint on you makes everything deeper. you feel it in the way he watches over you, listens to every word like it matters, defends you with his entire body, and looks at you like you’re the sun itself.

you still remember the day he told you about the imprint and what it meant for you. it was when you first started to date, taking things slow, and then the imprint changed everything.

he tried to hide it but one day the whole truth came out—rushed, broken, raw.

“i can’t do this anymore.”

“quil— what?”

“you’re my imprint. that means… you’re it for me. forever. but i didn’t want to trap you with that, or scare you. i just—god, I’ve been in love with you for so long, and the second it happened, it got worse. it’s not obsession, i swear. it’s just you. it’s always been you.”

you didn’t say anything at first. just looked at him with wide, unreadable eyes.

quil’s heart sank like a stone.

“…you’re gonna run now, huh?”

“no,” you whispered. “i’m going to kiss you.”

and when your lips met his? it was everything. the imprint clicked into place from your side now—your body just knew.

he trembled when he held you, almost like he couldn’t believe it.

“you don’t have to love me yet,” he whispered, forehead pressed to yours. “just let me love you. let me show you.”

you didn’t even hesitate.

“then show me, quil.”

and he did show you. everyday since then.

quil’s love is loud, unapologetic, and forever. you never have to question it.

[astrosky33]

𝐑𝐄𝐋𝐈𝐀𝐁𝐋𝐄 𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐎𝐋𝐎𝐆𝐘 𝐁𝐎𝐎𝐊𝐒 𝐈 𝐑𝐄𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐃 𝐀𝐒 𝐀 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐅𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐋 𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐎𝐋𝐎𝐆𝐄𝐑

ABOUT ME

Hello! I’m Skylar if you’re new to my page and I got my diploma in astrology from Kepler College (the #1 best astrology school in the world)

I’ve been studying astrology for over a decade now as well and these are the books I recommend

☆ BEGINNER BOOKS ☆

The Only Astrology Book You’ll Ever Need by Joanna Woolfolk

Goes over all the basic information for beginners and has interpretations written in as well. In the beginning of the book it focuses a lot on Sun Signs but gives more insight on other placements later in the book don’t worry

Astrology for the Soul by Jan Spiller

Another great book for beginners. I like the interpretations

The Inner Sky by Steven Forrest

Written by a very renowned astrologer. He goes over signs, aspects, etc and breaks them all down really well

You were born for this by Chani Nicholas

I love how this book goes over how to use astrology in your daily life and isn’t just cookie cutter definitions of placements like many other books. It’s also interactive and you can write in some pages which is always fun. It’s one of my favorite books for beginners

Aspects in astrology by Sue Tompkins

This is a great book for people curious about what each aspect means and how they can manifest into your life

☆ INTERMEDIATE BOOKS ☆

Predictive Astrology by Michele Adler

This book is definitely worth the price. It gives lots of information on techniques you can use to make predictions in astrology. It’s based on Western Astrology

The Art of Predictive Astrology by Carol Rushmam

Another great predictive astro book that talks about how to make predictions based on transits in your chart

Medical Astrology by Judith Hill

This is a great book with information on body part astrology and medical information. Although I do want to note when reading this do not be afraid if you share one of the transits that the public figures mentioned had during their health issues arising as astrology is a polarity. Meaning you can take on positive traits rather than the challenging ones often

☆ ADVANCED BOOKS ☆

Asteroid Goddesses by Demetra George

Goes over all the major asteroids in astrology. This can help you a lot if you’re interested in learning basic information on asteroids

Planets in Composite by Robert Hand

There are not many books out there on Composite compatibility so out of all of them this is my favorite even though it’s very basic it’s still a good read if you’re learning about Composite charts

The Psychology of Astrocartography by Jim Lewis

This is the best book about astrocartography I’ve found so far and very informative. The only bad thing I have to say about this book is that the print is really small. It’s amazing other than that though

☆ OLD AGE ASTRO BOOKS ☆

Mastering Traditional Astrology by Mychal A. Brian

If you’re more interested in old age astrology then this is an amazing read. You can purchase it on Amazon

Astrology of the Tree by David Frawley

This is great for beginners in vedic astrology and goes over all the basics. Really anything by David Frolly is great if you want to learn about vedic

The Nakshatras; the Lunar Mansions of Vedic Astrology by Dennis Harness

It’s a short read and goes over all the meanings of all the nakshatras

Light on Relationships by Hart De

A very comprehensive read that goes over synastry in Indian astrology. It gives lots of interesting techniques that can give insight on future marriages as well

Mayan Calender Astrology by Kenneth Johnson

This is extremely hard to comprehend so don’t purchase if you’re new to astrology. Even I had to read it a few times to fully get it. It discusses the astrology that the egyptians wrote in their hieroglyphics

☆ BOOKS I STUDIED FOR MY DIPLOMA ☆ [these aren’t all of them just some of my faves]

Sky and Psyche; the relationship between cosmos and consciousness by Nicholas Campion and Patrick Curry

This is an extremely underrated book and one of my favorites by far. This book goes over not just meanings of the planets, houses, synastry aspects, etc but also why the planets manifest in certain ways

The planetarization of consciousness by Dane Rudhyar

This one isn’t a basic overview like the other books I’ve mentioned it’s more psychological type astrology which I found really interesting

History of western astrology volume 1 & 2 by Nicholas Campion

This goes over how astrology has been used throughout history and why it was used in the past

☆ OTHER ASTRO BOOKS ☆

Moonology by Yasmin Boland

This is a manifestation astrology book. It gives an amazing story about the authors life before using astrology and manifestation and how it impacted them. Great for learning how to manifest using the moon cycles and astrology

The Handbook of Chinese Horoscopes by Theodora Lau and Laura Lau

My favorite Chinese astrology book. There isn’t many good ones out there

Birth Time Rectification by Paul Manley

There are some things I would’ve added to this book that weren’t mentioned but other than that it’s pretty good in helping find the right birth times using vedic astrology

<- 𝗠𝗔𝗦𝗧𝗘𝗥𝗟𝗜𝗦𝗧

[cimoris]

- ⚜︎ Lone Wolf ⚜︎ -

A Cookie Run Kingdom Reader Insert Fanfiction ============================================== Relationship: Teenager!Reader & Parent!Pure Vanilla Cookie, Strawberry Crepe Cookie & Reader Summary: Vanillians are gentle cookies. But they also have giant bots to guard them.

Series/AU: Chasing Home

<< Prev -- Next >> [Masterlist]

==============================================

From the words on the streets, Y/n knows that the Vanilla Kingdom is a pacifist kingdom. Where Dark Cacao Kingdom trains their young to be warriors, the Vanilla raises their young to be kind. Where the Hollyberry kingdom is full of righteous knights, the Vanilla Kingdom is full of forgiving priests. 

And for a cookie like Y/n, this place will be an oasis. A place for her to take a break from the constant running. If she is lucky, she can loot some coins from unsuspecting cookies–buy herself fresh pastries to satisfy her hunger, and for once, she can sleep with a full stomach. 

Y/n should have known. The streets were and never had been a good source of information. If her father is around, he would tut at her for not cross-checking her information resources. And that mistake landed her in the current situation. 

There is a reason that the Vanilians can live so carefreely. 

That reason is their Waffle bots. 

Lots and lots of Waffle bots.

Y/n rushes through the crowds, pushing away passersby while dodging grabby hands of giant waffle bots. She ignores the sound of mechanical waffle gear grinding against one another as more and more of the bots gather to surround her.

She cannot die yet. Not until she meets her brother again. She needs to see him and their sister.

A waffle bot glides down from the sky and lands in front of Y/n, giving the young-minded cookie no time to stop herself. Her body harshly slammed into the bot’s body, and before she could even register the pain, the robot had enclosed its hands around her.

Y/n grimaces. She looks up at the robot, staring right into the red jewel that stares back at her. The sunshine reflects from its shiny surface and enters her eyes, forcing her to squint. Baring her sharp teeth, she growls and struggles against the tightening hold. 

“Let me go! You, foolish piece of junk!” Bronze mist begins to leak from her hands, spreading over the bot. “Stupid waffle! Useless! I will rip you apart!”

“Hey! Stop calling him that!”

Y/n scowls at the voice. It is a shrill and high-pitched voice that aggravates her ears, making her already bad mood worse. She tries to twist her body around so she can spit right into the owner of such a voice. 

To her surprise, the bot did her the favour and turned her around to face the voice owner. Only to face a child? 

The young cookie is short and stout, wearing odd-looking jewelry on their pink short hair to go along with their classic vanillians clothes. On their side are two pairs of floating artifacts, powered by overflowing magic that even the weakest magician can sense. They are supposed to resemble a pair of helping hands, but some essential aspects are missing, and Y/n can see they are practically floating decorations. 

The same cookie glares at her, somehow managing to command those decorations to resemble a pointing hand. 

“These waffle bots are not stupid! They are state-of-the-art technologies that only a genius like me can create!” The cookie scoffs and puffs their chest, while Y/n rolls her eyes. She looks up to the waffle bots, finding the red jewel still staring at her. 

“This is how you define state-of-the-art? Hah! What a joke!” She turns back to the cookie, forgetting entirely her capture. “I’ve seen better technologies amongst the junk!” 

The cookie’s face goes impossibly red, “What did you say, you peasants?!”

“You heard me! Your bots are low-quality contraptions! Even a newly born dough can make a better one with mere paper and glue!”

“What peasants like you know?!” The cookie walks up to Y/n, who is still held tightly by the waffle bots. “I doubt you even know the difference between a screw and a gear!” 

“I doubt you know the difference between a proper magic circle and a child’s scribble! What even are those ugly decorations that float around you anyway?!”

“Decorations?! These are my masterpieces! Oh you little uneducated scrou–”

And as another insult was about to leave her mouth, Y/n’s word stuck on her bitter tongue. Word chained by the bewitching smell of old magic amongst sweet vanilla flowers. Familiar like the magic flowing underneath her dough, and unique like none other she had ever seen in other cookies.

With shrunk, sharp irises of a beast, Y/n’s head turns to follow the trail of magic. 

And there she found, not her father, a foreign cookie donning her father’s heart at the centre of his chest.

THIEF THIEF THIEF THIEF THIEF THIEF THIEF THIEF

“My dear subjects, what is going on here?”, Pure Vanilla Cookie, King of Vanilla Kingdom, asked full of concern.

<< Prev -- Next >>

[live-laugh-legolas]

Hi! For a request could you do The Fellowship as parents? Like reader has a kid with them what would they be like? Have a great day!

Cute! This has just been sitting in my drafts

The fellowship as parents

Aragorn:

-This might be controversial

-Because ik we know Aragorn is daddy (hehe)

-But

-He’s not the best father of those on this list

-He’s a great dad don’t get me wrong

-He’s very patient and guiding

-But he’s also not the uttermost hands on

-He wasn’t raised like that

-He kind of lets his kids figure stuff out on their own while supporting them and making sure they don’t die

-Which isn’t necessarily a bad thing at all; just compared to the others I’d rank him lower

Legolas:

-I have a hard time picturing him as a dad; more like a cool uncle

-But he would be the dad that’s kinda on the same level as the kids

-I think elves are kind of feral growing up so his parenting reflects that

-Yes they are elegant and poised; he is a prince so his kids need to know manners

-But he will join them in eating things they shouldn’t

-Climbing places probably not good for a child to be

-I don’t get the vibes that he particularly dreams of being a father; but he would take on the job to the best of his ability should it happen

Gimli:

-Father of the year right here

-I just think dwarves are generally good parents and if we consider his father; well let’s just say he’s got a good relationship

-Won’t stop talking about his children

-Will go to all the tea parties and talk to the plushies

-Yes he is wearing a tiara; obviously

-A goofy dad; no problem embarrassing his children for his own entertainment and to keep their egos in check

Boromir:

-A very good father

-He doesn’t take after his father; and instead treats his kids kinda how he treats Faramir

-Literally the most love and pride

-Please give this man a daughter

-He would spoil the shit out of his little princess

-He would also be sooo excited to be an uncle

Frodo:

-Another one I can’t picture as a father; but he would take a kid under his wing

-Let’s kids tag along with him for anything

-Talks to them the same way he would anyone; which makes the kids think he is the coolest

-Like he doesn’t coddle anyone and is very honest (with maybe a bit of cheek)

-He kind of co-parents with all his friends

Sam:

-Another top tier dad right here

-It’s always been his dream to have kids (a lot of kids)

-I’ve been living for the bunny comics made by @rutobuka2 and Sam literally embodies a bunny in the sense of family size

(I’m a definitely more a LOTR person than Hobbit but damn it if this isn’t some of the cutest art I’ve ever seen)

-Anyway; I’ll stop fangirling and get back to the hc’s

-He is super gentle with his kids; but also is very good about discipline

-Definitely teaches his kids to take care of their mom

Merry:

-Super involved with everything

-Gets his kids whatever they want but they do have to work for it; more like rewards and gifts

-Loves to build things for his kids; like a treehouse or wooden boats

-Takes his kids on rides and fishing trips

-Makes sure they know basic life skills

Pippin:

-He’s a fantastic dad

-I feel very repetitive in saying that but it’s true; the fellowship of good dads

-So engaged with his kids

-Will go above and beyond in their games

-Takes dress up very seriously

-I imagine him also being very scheduled with bed time

-He probably riles his kids up before bed with silly bedtime games (which is what my dad did)

-Seems counter productive but it made me excited to go to bed so I never really fought it; genius

Gandalf:

-Grandpa energy

-But chaotic

-We know he is good with kids; or at least that kids love him

-Can keep anyone entertained

-You can trust him to babysit

-This is in moderation though

-He will grow tired and want a break so he will dump them on someone else for a bit

[winchesterwild78]

The Art of Not Saying "I Love You" pt 4

Master List

Characters: Soldier Boy, Ben x Reader, other characters from The Boys

Warnings: some angst, lots of fluff, Ben the ol softy 

A/N: I’ve loved writing this story. Ben always gets a bad rap because of his personality, but I see right through it. He was hurt and betrayed by his father and then the woman he loved. He was tortured for over 40 years, I don’t know about you but I’d be a little pissed too. I love writing soft Ben, because I have a feeling if the right woman came along she could break down those walls, brick by brick. I can see him falling in love and it scaring the hell out of him. 

I hope you’ve enjoyed this story. Thanks for reading it. 

I do not own the rights to the characters in this story. This does not follow The Boys timeline, and is a work of fiction.

All work is my own, please don’t take it or use it without permission. Reblogs and Likes are always welcome.

Written and edited fast, please overlook any errors. 

Minors DNI 18+

Annie looked at me stunned. “You’re what?!” Tears pricked my eyes, “I’m pregnant. Oh Annie, what am I going to do?” 

She pulled me close and wrapped her arms around me. “We will figure it out.” 

I swallowed hard as a lump formed. I knew the baby was Ben’s. Tom always wore a condom and never finished inside me. He always pulled out and finished in the condom. Ben however, was proud of the fact he came inside me. 

I placed a hand on my stomach. I couldn’t believe this was my life. So utterly alone, heartbroken and pregnant. 

I felt the bile rise up in my throat and I ran to the bathroom, emptying the contents of my stomach. 

When I finished I cleaned myself up, brushed my teeth and went back into the living room. 

Annie was texting and my heart sank. “Annie, please don’t say anything to anyone. Even Huey. I don’t want Ben to know.” 

“Oh sweetie, it’s not my place to tell anyone. I was just letting Huey know I was staying the night with you. Y/N, I’m not going to tell you what to do, but I think you should tell Ben. If this is his baby don’t you think he should know. Even if you two aren’t together, don’t you want your baby to have both their parents in their life?” 

“I don’t know what to do, Annie. Can I really raise a baby on my own, do I want to? I was in love with Ben. Hell, I still am. If things were different I’d be over the moon to have a baby with the man I love, but he has made it clear he can’t or won’t have a relationship with me. I can’t risk him hurting this child. If I keep the baby, they will only know they are loved and wanted. I don’t want them growing up thinking they weren’t good enough to be loved by their father.” 

She touched my arm, “Well, whatever you decide I’ll be there with you. This baby will always be loved and taken care of. Right now let’s focus on getting you something to eat and relaxing.” 

I nodded and she pulled me in tightly for a hug. 

“I don’t have much here for food.” “It’s okay. I’ll run to the store since you’re not feeling well and grab some stuff. You stay here and rest.”

I nodded, she hugged me and left. I thought about what she said about Butcher. 

I took a deep breath, swallowing the lump in my throat and hovered over his contact information in my phone. 

I pushed it and bit my lip. One ring and he picked up. 

“Oi, love! Are you okay? Where are you?” 

My voice was soft, “Hey B. I’m okay. I’m so sorry I cut you out. I’ve been dealing with everything. I just needed to get away and clear my head.” 

“I understand, love. Are you coming home?” 

“No, I have a place now. I’m so sorry B.” Then I heard Ben in the background. “Butcher get the fuck off the phone. We have work to do.” 

I gasped at the sound of his voice. It sent a shiver down my spine. My breath hitched. 

“Shut it you fucking cunt. I’m talking to Y/N.” 

“What?! How is she, where is she? Let me talk to her.” 

“No, Butcher. I don’t want to talk to him. Please.” 

“No. She doesn’t want to talk to you.” 

I felt sick. My heart pounded in my chest. Part of me screamed out for him and another part wanted to keep him away. I was so torn. 

“Hey, Butcher. You sound busy. I promise to keep in touch. I love you, B.” 

“Okay, I love you too, Y/N.” 

We hung up and the tears fell. I sat my phone down and it rang almost immediately. 

I looked at the screen and it was Ben. I sat staring at his name. The call ended and he called right back. He was relentless. 

Finally I answered, “Hello, Ben.” 

“Oh my god, Y/N! Thank god you answered. Are you okay? Where are you?” 

“I’m okay Ben. I’m not going to tell you where I am. I need to protect myself from you.” 

He gasped softly, “Please don’t say that, baby. I would never hurt you.” 

I scoffed, “But you did, Ben. You made me fall in love with you and then you pushed me away. How could you do that?” A sob left my lips.

Ben ran his fingers through his hair, “Baby, I didn’t mean to hurt you. You’re everything to me.” “No, Ben. I’m not. If I was you wouldn’t have slept with another woman the day after we made love all weekend.”

He sighed heavily. “Ben, I need to tell you something. Before I do I need you to understand I don’t need anything or want anything from you.” 

“Okay, sweetheart. I understand.” Ben’s heart quickened and his mind began to race. 

“Ben, I went to the doctor for a physical and they ran some routine tests. The doctor called me today with the results.” I swallowed hard and took a deep shaky breath.

“It’s okay, Y/N. Is everything okay?” My voice quivered, “No Ben, but I will be. Ben, I’m pregnant.” 

Ben almost dropped his phone, “What? Is it mine or Tom’s?” “It’s yours. I’m positive. But I don’t want or need anything from you. I just wanted you to know. You have a right to know.” 

“Y/N, please tell me where you are. I want to be there with you.” “Ben, it’s too late. You made your choice and I’ve made mine. I’ll keep you updated on the baby, but I’m not expecting anything. I don’t want them to feel like they are unloved or unworthy.” 

“Don’t do that.” His voice dripped with venom. “Don’t do what? Tell the truth? Ben I know you used me. I was stupid enough to fall in love with you, stupid enough to believe I mattered and that you loved me too. But you’re not capable of loving anyone, are you?!”

“Stop! You do matter to me, dammit. I’m a fucking coward! Is that what you want to hear? I’m a fucking coward who finally let his walls down, made love to a beautiful woman, apparently made a baby with her and then I pushed her away. All because I’m too much of a fucking coward to admit…” His voice trailed off. 

I heard the pain in his voice and it sent a pang of guilt and sadness through my heart. “To admit what Ben?”

“Just forget it. You’ve made up your mind already, Y/N. I want to be in our baby’s life. They will know I’m their father and I’ll do whatever I can to protect them.”

“Ben.” My voice is soft and unsure. “Y/N.” “Please tell me what you were going to say. I need to hear it. Please.” My voice quivered and I felt the tears start to fall. 

Ben was quiet on the other end. He took a deep breath. “I um.. Shit, this is harder than being tortured for 40 years.” I chuckled softly, “Ben, please. You can trust me. I love you, Ben.” 

Just like that a switch flipped, “Y/N, I’m sorry. I’ve been a fucking pussy. I let everything Crimson and those Reds do to me cloud my judgement and build up walls. You broke through those walls without even trying. Now you’re having my baby. Y/N, I’m so sorry it took me this long to grow a pair. I love you. I’ve loved you since the moment I laid eyes on you.” 

My breath hitched and I smiled. There it was. Ben finally said it. Finally admitting what he had been pushing down deep. 

“I love you too, Ben. Now get your ass over here.” I gave him the address and he laughed, “Yes ma’am. I’m on my way.”

When Annie came back from the store I told her what happened and how Ben was coming over. She hugged me and told me she was glad he finally admitted he loved me. “I knew it this whole time. It was the only thing that made sense. He’s been terrified of giving his heart away again and having it crushed. I’m happy for your sweetie. I’m going to leave so you two can have some privacy. Let me know how it goes.” I nodded and gave her a hug. 

I sat on the couch and waited for Ben. My heart pounded in my chest. Every minute felt like an eternity. An hour had passed since the phone call. My heart began to ache. It doesn’t take an hour to get here from the apartment. Oh god, he did it again. I let myself believe him.

As the familiar ache started to fill my heart the sound of the doorbell pulled me from my thoughts. 

I took a deep breath and opened the door. Standing there was Ben. Looking as amazing as ever. In his hands was a bouquet of my favorite flowers, a bag filled with my favorite snacks and another bag. 

I chuckled when I saw it. His green eyes met mine, “Sorry I’m late sweetheart. I had to make a stop.” 

He walked in, sat the stuff down and I leaped in his arms. He pulled me flush to his chest and kissed me. The kiss was gentle at first but then it deepened. The pain and sorrow from the past two months melted away with every swipe of our tongues, every brush of his fingertips. 

When we pulled away from each other our chests were heaving for air. Ben’s hands cupped my face, “God you’re so beautiful, and you’re having my baby.” I smiled and leaned into his touch, “Yeah, we’re having a baby, Ben.” 

He placed his hands gently on my stomach, “Hey baby. It’s your dad. You’re going to come out and kick ass.” I playfully slapped his arm, “Ben, language.” He smirked, “Sorry, but he will.” “Oh so it’s a he?” 

Ben just looked at me, “I like to think so. He’s going to grow up loved, strong and I’ll always be so fucking proud of him.” 

I saw tears prick Ben’s eyes. I placed my hands on his chest, “Ben, you’re going to be an amazing father. You just have to let us in. Don’t push us away and always remember there is nothing you could ever do that will make us not love you. Hell, even after you slept with that woman I was still in love with you.” 

I stepped closer to Ben, “I still love you, Ben. So much. This baby, our baby is going to be loved and grow up strong like you are. You’re worthy of love and so much more.”

Ben pulled me close to his chest and held me tight. “How did I get so lucky to have your love? I’m sorry I pushed you away. I’m sorry I made you ever feel unloved and unwanted.” The tears that had pricked his eyes were starting to fall. 

I’d never seen him cry and my heart ached. I reached up and wiped his tears away with my thumbs. “Ben, you’re here now and that’s what matters. Don’t ever do that again or we (I placed my hand on my stomach) will kick your ass.” 

He chuckled, “I wouldn’t think of it. This, us, our baby, is all I’ll ever need. I made not saying I love you an art, but with you I never want to miss the chance to say it again. “I love you, Y/N. Now and forever.” “I love you too, Ben. Now and forever.”

Tags are open, if you want to be added or removed, let me know.  

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[fluffyxai]

Affirming Hypnosis

Who is really the master in this scenario? XD (Oops, I forgot to draw the summoning mark that appears on them when Caprii is there. I can't be bothered to add it now.)

I've been inspired lately by all the cute art that @hyenafu makes of their OCs from their webcomic Slightly Dammed with one of them as a big snake and this snake and elf have cute playful and oftentimes affirming and wholesome hypnosis and coiling and it's just so cute and sweet that I've been all over their art haha  So I really wanted to take inspiration and do something similar with my own elf and her eidolon Caprii! If you haven't met these two before, Taeryn is my D&D high elf summoner. She's 21 and formed an adventuring group with her friends to help people after she was kidnapped as a child, and would have been sold into some kind of awful trafficing if she hadn't awakened to strange powers through a series of 5 weird dreams, after which she gained the ability to summon this eidolon, Caprii the snake.  After Caprii appeared and basically tore apart the bad guys so the child could escape, the two have been living together ever since. And now Taeryn wants to help other people who are trapped and scared like she once was

Over the course of the campaign, Taeryn has become an incredibly gifted mage. But I always love how the relationship is between her and Caprii. Taeryn is supposed to be the master, but she goes giddy for her best friend's coils and hypnotic powers. Also, while Caprii is very standoffish and rude to most people, she ADORES Taeryn and will get very defensive over her. Taeryn however thinks of Caprii as her best friend and doesn't want her to get hurt.

So the two are a very cute pair, and spend most nights with Taeryn cuddled up in her big scaly friend's snuggly coils. (Sometimes a certain tiefling is invited into the hug too XD)

Here, we have Taeryn struggling to break herself out of the throes of intense work researching magic, or perhaps trying to find some way to best their next adversary. But after working herself to the point of exhaustion, maybe she needs a friend to force her to rest. Actually Venetia's player suggested that she probably asked Taeryn to stop and take a break first, but after Taeryn refused, Venetia gave Caprii a nudge to 'persuade' her to stop. I'm sure Venetia will join in the cuddle break time after not too much longer X3 She'll be willing, but maybe Caprii will give the tiefling some hypnotic therapy too~!

[azaharinflames]

I fell into the deepest depression I’ve had for years when Buck and Tommy broke up. I just wanted to cry so badly but decades of trauma kept me from doing that. Add on that Trump had just been re-elected, and add in that my Dad had been admitted to hospital with a collapsed lung it just took me down.

I’ve mostly gotten over it. I spent 24 hours writing my idea of a fix it fic (won’t happen on show cause they all suck but it was cathartic). I can’t remember what caused my breakdown but I did end up crying. My eyes felt less puffy after as well.

I understand that it’s a fake relationship in a fake show but something about it spoke to me. And just watch it end hurt me worse. The last time I had actually cried hard was in 2021 when my mother-in-law passed away from COVID. So why did this stupid relationship affect me so much. I feel embarrassed for reacting this badly. I don’t even like to talk to my partner about it because he wouldn’t understand.

Hi, Nonnie! Thank you for your ask.

I am so, so sorry to read that. Listen - it's not stupid. It's not embarrassing So don't think your feelings surrounding it and your reaction to any of it is that, because I promise you: nothing about it should make you feel embarrassed.

Here is the thing: Art, in whatever form, is one of the things that move people the most, historically*. Art is a universal language that doesn't simply exist in a painting or a sculpture but in a myriad of different forms that, especially in the last few decades, have expanded immensely. Art can be a channel for our emotions, can be our choice of escapism, can be the thing we see ourselves reflected in and thus, the thing that we connect to because, hey - that's us. And if we see 'us' overcoming on screen, surely we can overcome in real life, right? That's one of the reasons why representation is so damn important.

Yeah, it was a relationship. But it shouldn't be reduced to just that. Instead of dismissing our feelings by making our issue seem nonsensical and small, let's think - my issue was because a piece of Art I connected to deeply was dealt with in a damaging way. And that carries consequences.

There is also the fact that, I think, for a lot of us, it was more than the break-up. The biggest thing to take into context was the election because it is just a matter of fact that we needed a win so bad that week, and we got the opposite of that. To get a bit more personal, I was already dealing with my town being hit with the worst natural disaster in my country this century, still had to hear from some of my friends to know if they were okay or even alive (fortunately, they're all fine), and I was seeing only tragedy whenever I went online. So this happening hit me really hard as well - but, like you, it was one of the things. Still, I spent three days barely able to take a bite and barely able to sleep, and a week with really high anxiety.

And sure, I did feel silly, but if I do love one thing, I sure do love introspection, I reached the aforementioned conclusion and reflection on Art (let me know if it helped or is a bunch of bs tho).

I think what you're doing, writing a fix-it fic, is amazing! You're channeling your feelings through Art, and I am sure it does feel very cathartic. I haven't written for 911 yet (definitely want to, I have some ideas that could work), but I have some years of writing for Marvel and Seblaine (Glee) on my back, so trust me when I say this is the better choice you could do - channel your feelings through your Art, and you will end up with something beautiful, I'm sure of it.

Sorry this was too long, but I'm here if you (or anyone else) needs to rant, vent, or discuss something (911 or whatever, something else is valid as well)

Take care, Nonnie <3 and all of you as well <3

*I have a bachelor's on this, please trust me on it lmao

[danikamariewrites]

hello!

it’s your feysand anon again, i read better than books this morning & once again you have done a phenomenal job. i can’t express enough how much i love your writing and how well you bring every single one of your requests to life. you’re writing is magic, truly!

i’ve never requested a headcannon before, so i hope i’m doing this write lmao. could you do what and how feysand would be in a relationship?

thank you d, ily 💜

Feysand x reader headcanon

A/n: Feysand anon you are so fucking sweet. This legitimately made me shed a few tears, no one has said that before and you’ve just made my year and you’re my new bestie. Sending you all the love and I hope you have a fantastic day💜

Warnings: none

Most caring, loving, attentive partners ever omg you would be showered in love by them

You saw how in love with each other they are and you were jealous. You want that kind of love. When Rhys and Feyre asked you to be part of the relationship your heart said yes but your mind was racing

You didn’t want to come between them or anything

In the end you say yes because you love them and they’re showing you that they want you

The IC are very accepting of you since you have been around for awhile and are happy that the three of you are happy

Rhys’s love language is gift giving and Feyre’s is quality time as well as gift giving

They’d shower you in gifts. There doesn’t need to be a reason they just want to

You’ve had to stop Rhys multiple times from giving you something that was far too expensive (Feyre too) but you feel bad when he gets that little sad face bc he can’t give you something

Rhys loves giving you and Feyre matching gifts

Sometimes matching lingerie

You love spending your days with Feyre in her art studio, teaching classes and just talking with her

When you’re not with Feyre you help Rhys with work and have tea time when he takes breaks

You sleep with them but you do have your own room if you need your space

A few months into the relationship you started joining Feyre for training

She told Cassian to go easy on you but once she turned her back and went to spar with Az you gave Cass a shit eating grin, “don’t go easy. I want to be able to flip you.” Cassian howled after you said that and agreed

Hewn city visits are very interesting

Picking on Kier with Rhys and Feyre is very entertaining

Your first visit was a little nerve wracking. Kier thought it would be a good idea to insult you and your “purpose” but Feyre and Rhys weren’t having any of that

When you first entered the throne room you stood between their thrones. Once Rhys called the dinner to start he motions for you to sit on his lap

Their attention is on you as you hold Feyre’s hand and Rhys leaves kisses on your neck

You caught Kier approaching and froze. You heard Rhys and Feyre in your mind, “it’s alright darling just stay calm.” “He’s useless, don’t let anything he says get to you. Bite back and keep your face bored.”

They kept their hands on you as Kier spoke, their faces the epitome of boredom and irritation with him interrupting their time with you

AFTER Rhys dismissed him, Kier got mouthy, “One whore wasn’t enough so now you share one?”

Rhys and Feyre were seeing red at that point. You all stood and Feyre pulled you to her. You made sure to keep your face unbothered but you were a little hurt by his comment

Your eyes wandered around the room and you could see Mor was fuming, Cass and Az looked like they were ready to attack

Rhys stepped off the dias coming toe to toe with Kier, towering over him

It was clear that Rhys was in Kiers mind terrifying him. The male was sickly pale by the end of it, “You’re dismissed for the rest of the evening.”

[minimultiestfandoms]

~~🎀 fashion icon 🎀~~

requested: yes

i hope this doesn’t suck to bad guys this is my first ever full writing and my first ever smut so please leave ideas and tips and feedback for me and let me know what you guys think! since i’m more of a headcanons and fake texts type of gal!

— Sunnie

inspired by song fashion icon by aliyah’s interlude

description y/n goes on a shopping trip with his friends and comes back to a clingy hyunjin who wants a fashion show from his very own fashion icon of a boyfriend.

warnings!: 18+!, male x male intercourse!, male x male relationships!, male feminization!, mentions of lingerie!, skirts!, handjobs!, boners!, cum play!, breeding kink!, anal sex!, mirror sex!, photography during sex!, nipple play!

——————————————————————————

It was an exhausting yet rewarding day, getting to hang out with the girls after so long was fun! going store to store and spending money on cute new things felt great, Y/N knew he would put these items all too great use as he wasn’t one for wasting his money on things he wouldn’t use and knows his boyfriend, Hyunjin would scold him if he did, anyway. Y/n enters his and Hyunjin’s shared apartment, taking his shoes off carefully and walking in holding about six bags, each from a different store in the mall, he looks around, no Hyunjin to be seen, which meant he was most likely in his makeshift art studio in the apartment.

Y/N slowly pats his feet on the floor as he makes his way to Hyunjin’s Studio, Holding his six bags, he slowly creaks the door open revealing a comfy domestic bare faced Hyunjin painting away at it slowly, the moon shun through the window of the room softly onto his skin making him look ethereal at this time in day, Y/N smiles “Hey baby” to which Hyunjin turns and smiles “Hey jagi, when did you get home?” “just now, what are you painting?” Hyunjin chuckles “oh I honestly don’t really know yet… I was about to take a break cause I’ve been in here a while… how was your day out with your friends?” Y/N, enters the room placing his bags down on the floor and sitting comfortably.

“It was great! We talked and drank coffee at first then went window shopping and actually bought some stuff, then we talked a little more and then they drove me back home!” Y/N explained enthusiastically causing Hyunjin to smile brighter as his boyfriend’s excitement and enthusiasm “oh, really? That’s great to hear, jagi, what did you buy?” “just some clothes” Hyunjin smiles “hey show me them! I want a fashion show, with my very own muse and model~” “Jinnie… right now? but you’re painting you really don’t need to..” Y/N pouted feeling bad that Hyunjin would have to stop doing something he loved just so he could watch him try on clothes “no jagi it’s fine, I told you already I’m blank anyway, you could give me some inspiration jagiya~” Y/N shyly smiles and nods, beginning to open one of the six shopping bags and pull out the articles of clothing from it signaling for Hyunjin to turn around with a wave of a finger, Hyunjin whines but listens turning around.

Hearing his boyfriend changing stirred something up in Hyunjin, he wasn’t sure what or why it happened but he tried to calm down when he heard his boyfriend state out a sassy “ahem~” to signal him to turn back around, Which Hyunjin did happily eyeing Y/N up and down slowly and smiling “you look good jagi…. the top and skirt look nice together….” Y/N smiles happily at his boyfriends response only to shift slightly from a change of glance in Hyunjin’s eyes, what was once admiration and love was now lust and desire, Hyunjin licked his bottom lip softly as he eyes Y/N “you know jagi… I might have a way to get inspired... care to help me out with that?” Y/N had never rushed so fast as he rushed towards his boyfriend clinging to him and whining “y-yes jinnie i wanna help~”

Hyunjin smirked carrying Y/N and lifting him over his shoulder as he left his studio and made his way to their bedroom, he placed Y/N softly down on the bed staring down at him as he softly raised his shift over his head and throwing it into some unknown corner of their room, Y/N sits up about to pull his shirt off too but Hyunjin stops him “ah ah ah jagi~ these stay on ok? ~” Y/N nods desperately laying back, Hyunjin leans down to kiss Y/N lustfully as he pull his sweats off himself, leaving him in his boxers as he starts to kiss and suck purple bruises of admiration and lust into Y/N’s neck slowly getting lower.

Hyunjin chuckles and lifts Y/N’s cropped shift just to where his nipples were revealed. Hyunjin slowly blows at them, causing Y/N to shiver and whine. Soon after, Hyunjin began to suck and lick at Y/N’s nipples while he palmed him through his short mini skirt, causing Y/N to moan and arch his back in pleasure. He slowly reached his big veiny hand under Y/N’s skirt and panties, pulling out his hard, fat and leaking cock, giving it a first few soft strokes as he kiss his boyfriend's lips once again.

Y/N moans into the kiss, causing Hyunjin to smirk and pump Y/N’s cock faster in his hands, god Hyunjin was so turnt on, he couldn’t help but grind the hard on in his boxers against Y/N, Hyunjin let’s go of Y/N’s cock for a moment, causing him to whine at the loss of touch, hyunjin needily taps his fingers at Y/N’s mouth placing them in his mouth once he opens his mouth and whines when Y/N sucks on them needily while looking up at him with his big doe eyes.

After a while, Hyunjin pulls out his finger and circles at Y/N’s entrance teasingly, causing him to whine “Jinne please~ don’t tease~” “why not jagi? can’t handle it?” “no please~” Hyunjin chuckles, usually he’d drag it out more but he couldn’t wait anymore he couldn’t wait to be in his loving little fashionable muse, he pumps his fingers in preparing Y/N for his cock and groans as he feels Y/N palm his hard on in his boxers, shit he might cum early….

He pulled his fingers out and desperately pulled out his cock from his boxers, shoving it into Y/N’s entrance causing both of them to groan “…shit… no matter how many times I stretch you out you always snap right back huh? ~ always tight for this cock huh jagi? ~” Y/N whines “mhmm haven’t even started yet jagi and your already speechless” Hyunjin smirks slowly moving, Y/N pouts “I am n-not speechless just… a little tired…from the mall” Hyunjin smiles “then let me take care of you baby~, be my little pillow princess~”

Y/N smiles tiredly and moans as Hyunjin speeds his hips up, the sound of slick, moans, pants and skin smacking on eachother fill the room in echoes, Y/N claws at Hyunjin’s back needily pulling him closer, Hyunjin’s free hand pumping Y/N’s cock, Y/N moans loudly and desperately as his back arches. Y/N couldn’t have thought his day would get any better, but getting fucked desperately by his boyfriend was something he would want to happen more in the future. Hyunjin sucks at Y/N’s neck thrusting and thrusting and thrusting when he feels something like a ribbon snap in him as he cummed in Y/N groaning, pumping Y/N more and more desperately, causing him to cry and spurt out a cumshot he whines.

“Fuck…. Jinnie I’ve never seen you cum so fast before…” “I’m sorry… I couldn’t help it…shit..” “mhmmm you feel nice inside….” as the two pant trying to catch their breath, Y/N notices Hyunjin’s disappointment and guilt as he felt like he should have made it last longer, Y/N chuckles “you know baby… if you reacted like this only to this outfit I don’t know how you’ll react to the other five bags especially the lingerie from Victoria's…” Hyunjin looks at Y/N and slowly smirks “your right… we still have five more bags for you to model for me jagiya~” Oh what a long night ahead of him Y/N had…

——————————————————————————

taglist; @bigkpopstan, @baka-writings, @haechansfbuddy, @jeonronwoo, @jiminslostjam, @bluejaem, @jisungismymom, @hyuckography, @i-luvsang, @neocrush, @moonshineboyz, @chewryy, @sugarcherriess, @jinkoh, @hazyhae, @angelbabyyy99

[nimbusalba]

Neil Gaiman, my thoughts and my love for good omens

I already said something about all this deal with Neil Gaiman yesterday in another blog. But I still have Things To Say, so here it comes (with links to all the info):

Here is the article (thank you @procrastiel)

Here is a link to the podcasts for free (thank you @queermarzipan)

Here is the Xitter post with the accusations podcast thingy (thank you @embracing-the-ineffable)

Here is the transcript of the first podcast episode.

The Main Thing I Have To Say:

We need to separate the author from his work (and with this I’m not speaking only about Neil Gaiman). While we might not agree with some things about the author's life or thoughts, that doesn't mean we can not keep enjoying their work, as long as that work is not morally unacceptable, obviously. Let’s take the example of one of my favorite tv shows of all time (other than good omens): Buffy The Vampire Slayer (and with this I’m showing my age here, ahem). Buffy is a magnificent show, a wonderful exponent of feminism (strong female protagonist and secondary characters), diversity (one of the main characters is a lesbian), critical thinking, death, love, inner strength, battling your own demons… As we all know, accusations of harassment against Joss Wheddon appeared in 2020 and a lot of his work was left behind. I agree that knowing that the creator of something you love is an abuser breaks your heart. But that doesn’t mean that you have to stop loving that show, that it stops being a great work of art or that you should feel bad for still liking it. Buffy the vampire slayer is still one of my favorite shows and I still rewatch it from time to time (not on loop as I do with good omens, but that’s another problem). And why? Simply because in that show a lot of very talented people worked very hard to make it great, not just Joss Wheddon. And I appreciate it even more now knowing that the actresses and actors (and rest of the crew)  in the series didn’t have as good a time filming it as they should have. 

My take on this story:

I’ve already said that my first impulse is always to side with the victims in these cases, because they rarely lie and the accusations tend to be proven true in the end. In this particular case, for the time being, I’m waiting for developments, as the information that has transpired is fishy, to say the least. I’m not defending Neil Gaiman either, mind you. Maybe tomorrow we will find another 20 people accusing him of abuse. I don’t know him nor pretend to know what he’s done in his life. For the time being, as I said yesterday, this looks to me like consensual sex between consenting adults. That shouldn’t be news to anyone, even if the practices in themselves are not your kind of kink. It’s not on to have sex with someone who is working for you, of course, but still in this particular case that’s not exactly what’s happened. The woman in question (Scarlett) was a friend of the family, not strictly a worker. They already had a friendship relationship before turning it into a sexual relationship and a working relationship on top of that. With this I’m only trying to say that it doesn’t look like she felt forced to have sex with him in order to keep her job and she has said that the sex was consensual. The other victim has also said that even if she didn’t particularly enjoy the sex it was also consensual. 

It looks like both victims were pretty young when the relationships took place. It's true that younger people can have problems when it comes to place boundaries, and an older or more experienced partner could take advantage of that. It is also true that later in life, when that person is more experienced or has had time to think about things, they can think about what they did and feel uncomfortable with it, even though it didn’t feel wrong in the heat of the moment and they said nothing then. But, as far as I know, that's not sexual assault.

This looks to me as something that’s been designed to hurt Neil Gaiman’s public image. Maybe he’ll come out of it without any criminal charges, as he has already offered his help to the New Zealand police and they have refused to interrogate him for the time being, apparently because of lack of proof yet. But his public image has been tainted, not only because of the accusations, but because anyone who has their sexual life exposed and discussed publicly suffers a great deal of humiliation, even more so if their sexual practices are not exactly mainstream. With this I’m not implying that BDSM or any other kink is wrong, as long as it is being played by consenting adults. No judgment here, everyone has their own kink, and I don’t care as long as they don’t harm anyone (or if they want to be lightly harmed).

Keep also in mind that one is innocent until proven guilty and in this case there is not a lot of proof yet and the place the news is coming from is suspicious, to say the least. Wait for developments (and see).

Conclusion

So keep loving good omens, I know I still do, keep enjoying it, writing fanfic, drawing amazing art, writing metas and discussing about it. Because this show is still a brilliant show, in which a lot of very talented people worked very hard to make it the wonderful work of art that it still is and we shouldn’t dismiss all that work because someone wants to hurt one of the authors. 

(Edited because of wording)

[whakkicat]

i am leaving

i made a post on my twt about this, but i should make it here as well.

this is my last text post before i archive this account and start elsewhere. video about what’s been happening at some point.

this post will be a personal note to friends, mutuals, communities, etc, and what will happen from here.

brief warning for mentions of abuse

1. i want to start with a word towards the rain world community. first off, i want to thank rain world for giving me a home. for starting me off as an artist. i had never actively participated in a fandom before this, and it was a wonderful experience.

the game brought me and so many of my friends together, i met a lot of amazing artists, some of which i’m still shocked they’re my mutuals, and rain world itself changed my life for the better, i believe. it gave me hope and something to live for when nothing else did.

i’ve always been quite afraid of voicing myself, as i had never participated actively in a fandom before, therefore had never gotten used to talking in one. but to those who’ve stuck around, who have enjoyed my content, thank you.

2. to the people who have been there for me during the worst, who have let me know i am not alone in my suffering, it means so much to me. i really hope that i can still keep contact with many of the people i have met on here.

there have been so many kind people on this platform and it’s been a joy talking to you all. if this is goodbye, to some, i wish you all the best. it’s only what you deserve.

3. i will be reaching out to the main people who i owe art to, regardless of cmms or not. it is unprofessional of me not to keep track of myself and keep everyone waiting. my ADHD has not made it very easy for me. i apologize.

4. this point will mention abuse, so cw dealing and getting out of abuse this year was extremely hard for me, and is still taking its toll on me. it’s part of the reason i can’t stay, because i feel they still have power over me, even if they’re not actively in my life anymore.

as i move on, i don’t want to completely abandon my past, and everything that came out of that abuse in the first place. i am not abandoning myself, or forgetting what i went through. i want to grieve my younger, naive self as i go forward as an artist.

this doesn’t mean i’ve let them win and break me down. i won’t give up on myself. i need to be kinder to myself and heal, so being away from this will help. this also goes out to anyone else trapped in their friendships, relationships. you will be okay. talk to

please do not silence yourself for the sake of other people. your own feelings are just as valid and important as anyone else’s. don’t let people make you feel bad for feeling your own feelings.

5. to mutuals who’d like to stay in contact, i have a priv account on twitter i will mainly be using from now on. it won’t be used as much as it used to, considering this is a hiatus, but it will be where i will reside. you’re free to ask me in dms.

6. i’ve already begun starting over, i won’t be gone completely. if you happen to recognize me in the near future, please do not pester me about it. simply accept that i have restarted, as a brand, as an artist, and i’d like to start over from square one.

7. this account will also be public for the remainder of its existence, however i may clean it up for archival purposes. i don’t want to simply vanish, i am proud of some of the work i have published, and i don’t want it to be forgotten.

it’s a bit odd, considering most of my art is composed of doodles, non-serious jokes, and mostly fanart. hopefully i can make self indulgent art in the future. i’ve always wanted people to know my characters, but was always too afraid to actually talk to people.

closing point i’m sorry if my absence upsets anyone, if you are disappointed in me. i can’t stress enough that this year has been hard enough on me, and being here is hard enough. i want a fresh start. i want to be okay.

i love my fellow artists, my friends, everyone. there’s so many talented people i’ve met and i don’t ever want to forget them. my last post will be my video talking about my experiences this year, previous years, because i feel it’s important for me to come out about it.

this is a goodbye. i will miss many of you. here’s to hoping the rest of the year will be good for everyone! until our paths meet again. good luck out there

[zippyskyfalls]

Callista Marin: The Eris Conspiracy

okay, I originally wasn’t going to post this here on Tumblr, this is a very private and personal project and only one other person I know is meant to see this, but I really like how the first chapter turned out! Thanks to that, I’ve decided to put this up on Tumblr in case anyone is actually interested in my work!!! Thank you to my amazing friend @protagaster who read this before anyone else, your words always help boost my mood and it’s truly been a pleasure being your friend

shoutout to the super cool @circe-puppeteer who makes me realize that I have never had an original experience in my life

and enough Stalling, hope you Enjoy what i’ve written!

(ye, i’m a Riordanverse fan, can you tell?)

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Look, I think we both know why you’re reading this Journal. You’re reading this because your interest in Greek Mythology and Modern Spins on it got you to pick up this book and see how it may compare to other works

I won’t try to shoo you away from this book because I know for a fact you won’t listen. I just want you to know that if I were you, and this story started getting relatable, i’d close this book.

It obviously won’t seem so relatable at the start, but hey, what do I know? Enjoy!!!

My name is Callista Marin, i’m a 14 year old girl living in San Diego, the current year is 1991.

I didn’t exactly have a normal life. I mostly grew up with my dad, traveling the world! We’ve gone to about 8 different countries, Brazil, Uruguai, Argentina, Ireland, Thailand, New Zealand, Australia, and Chile. We got back to the US about 2 years ago.

My father has always been there for me, he’s the one who fed me, kept me safe, kept me warm. I’m not sure I would have made it this far if it wasn’t for him.

He’s always been my biggest supporter, the man who paid for my art supplies even when we didn’t have the money, the man who taught me how to get past an art block, the man who taught me practically everything I know!

It’s always just been me and him… yeah, I should probably explain that.

You may have noticed that my mother hasn’t been mentioned yet! She’s… out of the picture. I never really met her, my dad says I have her eyes. Just basic brown, the most common of the colors. I personally don’t think I need to know about my mother, and I don’t want to know anything about my mother.

She had already made her choice the moment she left my dad to take care of me on his own. Even if she wanted to form a relationship with me, she missed her chance.

Alright, next order of business, my school.

For the past year, I've been attending San Diego’s Private School for Gifted Children, the name practically tells you everything you need to know. I had gotten in thanks to a given scholarship I earnt thanks to an art exhibition in which I won first place. I’m definitely better at some things than others when it comes to the school work.

The school takes education very seriously, any student with lower than a 75% grade isn’t coming back next semester.

Maths? Big no-no. Art? That’s where I shine! It’s all i’m good at, it’s all I can do. I don’t really get along with the kids in the school, they aren’t BAD people… I just don’t know how to make friends.

That was until this august.

“Please settle down, students.” Mrs Rivers began. She’d been a teacher at this school for 17 years, one of the oldest teachers here.

Mrs Rivers is a tall white lady with Brown Frizzy hair and looks like a hippie straight from the 80’s, a long, flowy skirt, a faded Fleetwood Mac t-shirt barely visible under her crocheted cardigan. She’s fun, I guess, but I personally think she tries too hard to make students like her.

“First off, I’d like to welcome you back from Summer break! I know everybody’s been busy getting that new Transparent landline phone I’ve seen appearing around stores”. A few students in the class stared at her with concern. I could hear Martha Stein, the dark-skinned blonde girl with braids who sat behind me, grumbling under her breath, something about the last generation needing to get with the times. 

I could definitely see her point. While I do think it’s unfair to judge Mrs Rivers for trying… it did make me cringe a bit.

“Second of all, we have a new student joining our class. Mr Jerrons, would you like to introduce yourself?” There was a brief silence before the classroom door creaked open. A boy stepped in, his left hand curling a strand of dark brown hair around his finger. “It’s uh– Herrans.”

His voice was soft, but there was something too even about it, like he was measuring every syllable.

The boy had short, curly brown hair that reached just below his ears. His eyes dark and his skin bronze. He wore a split red and black tank top tee with a black jacket with hot pink accents on top. His long, dark, Baggy Jeans made the sandals which were definitely not dress code approved barely visible

He wasn’t just good-looking—he was beautiful. The kind of beauty that made your brain short-circuit for a second because it didn’t seem quite real.

The other girls must have noticed it too since suddenly, the new kid already seemed to have eyes on him. Not just girls, even some guys, too. It was a rare sighting to see that.

Venus seemed used to it, too. He stood there patiently, waiting for the murmurs to settle, like this happened all the time.

“Alright,” he continued. “My name is Venus Martinez Areia Herrens. I’m fifteen years old, and I’m here on a scholarship. I, uh… have a deep interest in history and the arts.”

That made me blink. Fifteen?

He didn’t look fifteen. Fourteen, at most. Maybe even thirteen.

I wasn’t the only one who caught that. I saw Martha Stein’s eyes narrow slightly, and another student—Jonas broth, I think—whispered something to his friend.

“Wonderful! Welcome, Mr. Hairline.” “It’s Herrens–” “You may sit beside Miss Marin for the remainder of the semester.”

The second the words had been spoken, I melted to the back of my seat. I knew the reason why, of course. I wasn’t exactly surprised. Mrs. Rivers always paired new students with me thanks to how quiet I normally was and knew I wouldn’t make much of a distraction.

But now, with literally every student’s eyes following him to the empty seat next to mine, I wanted to disappear.

Most – if not all – students turned around and stared at the empty seat. Venus walked calmly, setting his bag down without a word. I didn't focus much on the lesson, something about the American revolution.

He just kind of… sat there. Unnervingly. If I didn’t know any better, I would have thunk he’d stopped breathing!

Them suddenly; Tap, tap, tap,

I stiffened. Someone was poking my shoulder

I turned my head slightly. Venus was watching me with an easy expression, holding out a folded piece of paper. Unfolding it carefully, I saw two words, written in slanted, careful handwriting:

Callista, right?

I frowned slightly, nodding. Was that really all he wanted to ask?

Venus flipped the paper over and scribbled something else before passing it back.

'Nice 2 Meet you'

It was oddly polite. Too… intentional? New kids usually waited a while before making conversation. He was getting straight to the point.

I stared at the note for a second before responding in my usual way: I pointed at the words and held up two fingers—same here.

I noticed from the corner of my eyes… He held a small smile on his lips. It was an odd feeling; the feeling of somebody you barely knew going out of their way to meet you, like a distant cousin you only met once at a family gathering

I didn’t mind it, Venus seemed like a cool guy!

Which was why, at the end of the class at hand, I had offered him a seat next to me during lunch.

[rainbowdaisy13]

Hey Rainbow, I'm kind of a new Kaylor. I knew of their existence back in 2016, but I wasn't part of this corner of Tumblr. It's only in the last few months that I've really become interested in Taylor's lyrics and the Kaylor storyline. The idea that she's closeted and struggling, and the beautiful and romantic tapestry of her lyrics that speak of a truly beautiful love story that the public doesn't really know about, these are the things that drew me to Taylor and by extension Kaylor. I know that the stuff with TK is PR. Dare I say it's the loudest and most obvious PR she's ever done. I know this, but it's actually getting painful to see it. I guess it's painful to see such a smart, articulate, and worldly woman be so happy in the company of the frattiest of frat bros. Or maybe it's hard to see her associate with them. Idk. I'm not here to attack her or anyone, but I guess I'm coming to you for a pep talk? I know this doesn't make me a good fan, but I'm not sure I'd like TS as much if I didn't think she was a closeted queer woman. I imagine I should take a break, but I fear that if everyone does that, will the Kaylor corner disappear? Will the comfort we find in Gaylor evaporate? I swear I'm a grown adult with a robust and fulfilling real life, but damn...this is getting to me.

Anyway, sorry for the novel. I hope it's not too annoying. You're so steadfast of a fan, and it seemed like you'd be the best to reach out to for support, ha.

First, never apologize!! Second welcome to Kaylor tumblr! Tis not for the faint of heart!

This is all I can give you in the way of a pep talk—I fully believe Taylor is a queer woman and that she’s been telling us that through art her since the very beginning. I also believe her and Karlie are in a long term secret relationship that they are choosing to keep hidden through Bearding and Lavender marriage for whatever reasons they have—and I’m sure there’s a ton of reasons that they have deemed good enough

As far as being a bad fan, absolutely not! I did not give a crap about Taylor until Rep. I knew of her songs but something about her always felt off to me, and disingenuous. Someone mentioned the word Kaylor and I went down the tumblr rabbithole of TTB and BOOM I was hooked. Taylor as a closeted queer artist made sooooo much sense to me as I always felt something was missing about her as a person, and suddenly here was this insane amount of evidence that only kept growing! It’s not like I joined during Rep and had to only look in the past, she continues to keep queer signaling in every aspect of her life. Thats a long way to say, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with loving Taylor for who she actually is—that doesn’t make you a bad fan for seeing her truth and loving her for it

As far as Kaylor tumblr disappearing, in the last 7 years I’ve been here, my follower count only grows. SO many people lurk in this space. There will always be some of us here documenting and discussing while others of us take breaks. We are pretty good about holding down the fort for each other in times of stress

Come and go as you need to, but us battle hardened OGs shall remain until she stops signaling through her art that she wants us to know the truth

[applestitches]

Hello, I have reflected on my faults due to events that have happened today, and I’ve decided that this would be a good time to create an apology post for those faults so I can move on from them along with detaching myself from them too.

So the first fault to start off with is a certain Deviantart account (that I will not be naming in this post, if you know which one then you know) I had created back in June to make fun of the users on there, and if you’ve been on that website for a bit you’d know what I was making fun of, but I had used the South Park characters and that was extremely inappropriate of me to do, for a laugh or not. A small temporary laugh is never worth the life long consequences, especially on the internet since nothing is truly deleted. I was honestly just looking for anything to make myself feel better with a laugh but a chose a really bad option and I’m sorry if I disappointed anyone with my actions here, I’m very very very sorry, I regret it so much.

By the time this post goes up, most of the art on that page will be gone and few drawings that I had decided to stay up will be up. There will be no way to interact with it because I wish to no longer be associated with it and to move on from it and remove some bad things that I should have never done in the first place. Even just for a laugh. I will never do anything like this again.

Secondly I want to say sorry for "the death" chapter of heavenparkawesome because it can be seen as inappropriate because of me depicting a character with nothing on (not in an explicit way, but still). I promise that if I ever release another page he will magically receive clothes, I very much apologize for this.

Finally, I’ve decided I am no longer going to post or reblog anything that is associated with shipping and will only stick to canon relationships, like Stan and Wendy and Tweek and Craig. I’m doing this to stay out of trouble with the fandom and to lay low with things like that, sorry to disappoint anyone who enjoyed that genre of my art. I don’t need to be shipping characters anyway.

I’m not going to quit or do that "I’m going to take a break for awhile, boohoo!" because of this, like I said previously, I want to move on from these things and make a few changes. No is obligated to forgive me, hell, you can start disliking me for these things I just confessed in this post. I don’t care, all I care is about me being able to continue to post fanart for my favorite show without any trouble following me.

I’m sorry

[thelediz]

Spoiler warning: I write happy endings

So I’ve been reading this fic series which is actually just one very long story that for some reason the author has decided to break into separate stories EVEN THOUGH you cannot feasibly read one without context. Believe me, I have tried to skip stories only to end up confused because I have clearly missed a plot point. Seriously, why is this a thing people do, it's so frustrating and -

I have been reading this fic series.

It’s really good, and I really enjoy the author’s writing style. I find it super easy to read, and I want to know how the story ends. But each time I read a chapter story, I walk away feeling low-key annoyed, anxious, or upset. And I find myself wondering, this morning, why am I doing this? I am not actually enjoying this story, so why am I still reading?

When I interrogate myself about it, I realise I’m falling into the same trap I often do with fiction: I want to know how the story ends, so I’m tolerating lots of things I don’t like in the HOPE it will end well.

This is actually why I like spoilers. Because if I know how a story ends, and I know the character motivations, then I know whether the journey to get there is going to be worth the pain.

At the moment, with this fic, I don’t. Because it’s told entirely from the perspective of a very unreliable narrator, and this particular author has never written from any point of view except this character’s. So I don’t even have context clues to tell me what this author thinks of the other characters and their motivations. And as the story goes on, while I am becoming increasingly certain that we’re not supposed to trust this character’s perspective, it’s just a constant slow build of tension, all from this one character, who I increasingly dislike.

Now, the story can be saved, I think, if something happens and the narrator is forced to confront the things I’m not liking about them. If the other main character can be rounded out and properly seen. But that’s not going to happen until a climax that I keep waiting for and not getting. Right now, I'm not even sure the things I dislike are supposed to be bad things! Sometimes I think I'm supposed to feel sorry for the poor baby! (I don't and will not)

I don’t personally write fanfic about characters I don’t like, and I wouldn’t want to write a story about a character or relationship that’s objectively doomed. Doomed by their personal perspective, maybe, (get loved Alastor) but I just really personally dislike unhappy endings.

That’s what the real world is for. Entertainment is supposed to entertain and comfort and give me hope.

I don’t read or watch things that I know won’t end well, even if I know they’re amazing works of art. Which is unfortunate, because it means I miss out on a lot of the zeitgeist, but it makes me a happier and more hopeful person.

So I read spoilers, so that I know, in the end, there is going to be a happy ending, and these are the characters I should be rooting for. If I have to engage with something I won’t enjoy, I can quietly disengage and disassociate and let it wash past.

But here I am, with this story series that I’m not enjoying, waiting for a happy ending I’m currently pretty sure won’t come.

I need to break up with this thing and it is so much easier said than done.

Harrumph.

So for those who read my stories, here is a blanket spoiler: I believe in happy endings. It may take a while to get there, whether literally or figuratively, but I always believe in happy endings. So please, judge my silly fics purely on the characterisation, the dialogue, and my incredibly poor proof reading, because it’s always going to end with someone smiling somewhere.

I hope that’s a comfort to someone.