#I'm slowly working on getting more involved in this project now that I actually have the time lmao

[inkbarista]

I just realized it's been like a year since I posted anything for ABS (I thought I had posted more >.>) but here are some character designs of both some main characters and side characters!

If you'd like to see more, feel free to join my Patreon!

[shepherds-of-haven]

Happy New Year, everyone! I thought it would be fun to do a little retrospective on the game's progress over the last year... Shepherds of Haven has grown so much from the little demo I posted in January 2018, and it continues to steadily build and flourish in so many different and exciting ways! Here's a look at just some of the things we accomplished in 2023!

I added 143,151 words to the game (2.5 main chapters, 8 new character interludes) in 2023: the equivalent of writing the longest Lord of the Rings book in one year! We also broke our huge 1 million word milestone—without including code—meaning Shepherds of Haven is now officially twice as long as War and Peace, and almost as long as the entire 7-book Harry Potter series... and all in a single game!

A lot goes into game creation behind the scenes, including the coordination and creation of visual assets for the game—like character cards, codex entries, maps, portraits, and backgrounds—fun stuff for the fans (like the MC info template we created), and songs for the official soundtrack. As the game creeps slowly and determinedly towards its initial completion, that also means learning new things as a solo developer to prepare for the future, like learning to build an official website, researching business and tax practices, and beginning to think about how to conduct testing, publishing, and marketing down the road. Much of what I enumerate here hasn't been made public yet and will continue to cook in the background for a while, but I'm very proud of the work I've gotten done this year and will be excited to unveil more in the future!

And of course, for even more Shepherds of Haven content, I've added and completed even more stories for our little library on Patreon (which also has sizable word count at this point): The Bridge of Bones (a Trouble and Riel murder mystery), O Happy Dagger (a dark adventure featuring Briony, Chase, and Red), and The Hunt (a wild tale involving Tallys, Halek, Shery, and new kinds of spirits, fey magic, and Elves) were all serial stories completed in 2023, while Some Kind of Virus is a cyberpunk zombie apocalypse AU that will continue to be updated with new chapters monthly.

A full list of the Shepherd short stories and serial novellas (with links) can be viewed here!

I hope you enjoyed this session of Shepherds of Haven Wrapped! Honestly, this doesn't actually cover everything I've been working on, but some things can't be packaged and listed out neatly, or otherwise won't seem very interesting to anyone else but me! 😂 As we inch through Chapter 9 and get more interludes done (only a few more main chapters to go), I'm hopeful that I'll also be able to find time to work on my next novel, but we'll see if the Shepherds schedule ends up ramping up or settling down as we work steadily towards finishing the main story!

One important thing before wrapping up is to acknowledge your guys' role in this wonderful, wild journey. I want to express my heartfelt gratitude to each and every one of you for your invaluable contributions to the development of Shepherds of Haven. Whether you took the time to share links to the game, supported its growth on Discord or Patreon, left encouraging messages or asked interesting questions, reported bugs, or showcased your remarkable works of fanfiction or fanart, I am sincerely thankful for the unwavering support from this amazing community! Your collective efforts have played a pivotal role in shaping the world of the game into what it is today. Words cannot adequately convey my gratitude for your support, and I am truly blessed to have such a passionate community surrounding this project.

As we step into 2024, I am filled with anticipation for the developments awaiting Shepherds of Haven. Big things are on the horizon, and I am so excited to share these experiences with you! Thank you for being an integral part of this journey, and here's to the continued growth of our shared little world. Cheers to 2024—may it be a year filled with creativity, adventure, and joy! 🎊

[ao3-shenanigans]

Okay wait here me out!

I never truly understood Hanahaki AUs where once character A confesses, B's all like "Actually, I liked you too for a while now!" because isn't it a sickness about unrequited love?

Don't get me wrong, I don't mind when characters finally confess and they get the sickness cured but what about literally SO MANY OTHER POSSIBILITIES!! I have a couple ideas in my head but don't have the chance to write them atm, but I was wondering about your thoughts on them!

So the first idea is what if you still want that happy ending but don't want the instant gratification? Like, A confesses to B and B is like "I'm sorry, I don't love you, but I want to take care of you to make this process go smoother for you." (And maybe add some guilt for some ✨spice✨) And eventually, B SLOWLY falls for A as they take care of them, but are unaware of said feelings until A's final dying breath and their final request is at least a kiss, even if B didn't love them. B desperately follows through trying to save A after realizing that they finally got feelings for them and BOOM! Happy ending!

Another idea is where character A is Aromantic so they literally cannot love B, and they know that. After realizing that B has gotten Hanahaki, A stays silent about it, not wanting to assume that B got it over them and wants to take care of them. B then says in a feverish state just how much they like A and let's just say the angst can get pretty heavy with this...

Now I like this one idea I have cause it mixes Hanahaki and the Red String of Fate! This one actually involves many characters and is a little more complex so my there are still some wrinkles in this idea, but what if A got Hanahaki for B, and B has Hanahaki for C, who's interested in someone else and C even gets with that person later. Eventually A confesses to B and B gets with A, curing A's Hanahaki, but B still dies because they couldn't let go of their feelings for C. That's when character D comes along, able to see the Red String! D can see other people's string, but doesn't have one for themselves for whatever reason (idk yet) and can see A's broken string and C actually even has a broken string because of their deep friendship to B. D then tries to figure out what the broken strings mean because they never seen it before, eventually falling for A, who (maybe) falls for them back. Again, still working on this idea! Just thought it'd be interesting to combine 2 AUs together!

This is all I have for now, but if you want more for me to share, I can gladly do so! If you could rate the Hanahaki trope in general out of 10 what would you pick? Feel free to even rate my ideas if you want! I won't take it personally if you don't like them, haha! Have a lovely week!

Friend I’m listening 👀

I did read a fic where the love interest couldn’t love back, not right away and it scared him because how are his feelings responsible for the life of his friend? How do you fall in love with someone on demand? It was really good

(I’ll link it below for anyone interested)

Ive read maybe 6 or 7 hanahaki fics? Its not one I frequent often, but I do enjoy the ones with a fun little twist in them :D

If you continue the AU please! Send updates and ideas! I’d love to hear them!

Fic mentioned:

Full, riotous bloom by BigTed on ao3

[angelsnkisses]

Cooling Off ♡ - Jack Thurlow x fem!reader

‼️ NSFW - MDNI ‼️

Summary: You find yourself in an extremely uncomfortable situation when your air conditioner breaks.. but Jack has a solution in mind.

warnings: dom!jack, sub!fem!reader, very brief mentions of marijuana, temperature play, slight bondage (hands tied), oral (fem receiving), unprotected sex, creampie.

A/N: guys when i tell you i got carried away i mean it, this is much, much longer than i intended it to be. they pretty much immediately get into the smutty stuff so fair warning :). enjoy!

💟 smut below the cut 💟

You groaned, fanning yourself desperately with your folder as you tried to focus on your work. This project had a deadline, and you were determined to get it in before then. It was just so hard to focus with the goddamn heat.

Moving to California had it's perks. You could smoke weed without much worry, enjoy the sunshine, go to the beach.. but god, the heat was never ending.

It was never much of a problem, however. You could always just stay inside, only going out when you went to work, hung out with your friends, or on a date with your boyfriend. Even then, it was almost always indoors.

So, you can imagine your disappointment when you woke up that morning covered in sweat, only to realize your AC had broken overnight. Jack tried to fix it, but you both agreed you needed to call someone instead.

Until then, you were stuck in the heat, much to your despair.

"Hey, I brought you some water," Jack's voice said, breaking your train of thought. You looked up from your computer, slowly shutting it and setting it on the bed next to you. "Oh, thank you. What time are those repairmen coming? I forgot."

"At 4.. so about two hours," he responded. He sat on the edge of the bed, a hand resting on your leg as he passed you the glass. You took a swig, sighing as the ice cubes clinked around the glass. It was such a relief, having something cold in the stuffy room. You set it on the nightstand, focusing your attention on him.

"Good, I'm melting. Like, actually melting," you whined, making him crack a smile. "I know, baby. It'll be all fixed up soon," he promised, leaning down and pressing a kiss to your lips sweetly. You took in a deep breath, kissing him back immediately. A hand fell on his chest, resting against the muscled surface. You could feel his heartbeat picking up subtly, making you smile into the kiss.

"I love this outfit on you," he muttered against your lips, his hand snaking up your leg to toy with the fabric around your thighs. It was hot enough that you had to wear next to nothing, clad with just Jack's boxers and a cropped black tank top. His outfit was just as scare, nothing but baggy sweats hanging low on his waist, leaving his torso visible. His long, soft hair was pulled back into a bun, and he looked delicious.

"Mm.." you hummed, pulling back. "Thank you."

He nodded, gaze flickering between your eyes and your lips. "Y'know.. I have an idea that might cool you off," he murmured, piquing your interest. You were into anything that could involve relief from the sweltering feeling on your skin.

"Yeah? Well I'm all ears, then," you replied, sitting up a little and leaning back against the headboard. He looked at you with adoring eyes.

"Do you trust me?" he asked, standing up slowly. You were confused by the question, but still answered without hesitation. "Of course I trust you.." you answered, a little nervous now.

"Hm.. good," he walked over to your shared dresser, rummaging through the top drawer and pulling out one of his ties. You looked at it quizzically when he walked back to you, an eyebrow raising.

"Uh.. I don't understand," you said quietly, and he just looked at you almost guiltily for a second. He looked more nervous than you did.

"I wanna tie your hands up, is that okay?" he asked suddenly. You stared at him for a solid few seconds before speaking, completely taken aback.

"M-my hands?" you repeated, and he nodded. "Mhmm, we don't have to. Just a thought," he assured you.

You think about it for a minute, weirdly turned on despite your mind telling you this foreign request was scary. How could it be scary? You thought to yourself. It's just Jack, the love of your fucking life.. he would never hurt you.

"Okay, sure. Just.. stop if I ask you to, okay?"

"Of course, baby. Just say the word, and I'll untie you. I promise," he said genuinely, holding up his pinky. You giggled, but still locked yours with it.

He chuckled quietly before leaning down, tugging at your tank top. "Take this off.. your bra, too," he whispered, seriousness beginning to leak into his tone. You fought back a smile. It was so cute when he got all stern with you.

You pulled your shirt over your head and let it drop to the floor, pretending you didn't hear the heavy breath Jack released. You took your time on the bra, slowly unclipping the brackets before pulling it off yourself.

He groaned under his breath when your chest was exposed for him to see, a noticeable bulge forming in his sweats. He stared at you with hungry eyes, sitting on the edge of the bed.

"Good girl.. now put your wrists together and hold them to the bedframe. Yes, just like that," he encouraged, watching you scoot down a bit, doing as he said. He leaned over you, carefully tying up your hands with his tie.

"Hmm.. good. You ready, baby?" he asked quietly. You bit your lip eagerly, excited to see what he had planned for you. "Yeah.." you confirmed. He smiled at your willingness, leaning forward and pressing a soft kiss to your forehead, one last act of gentleness before he began.

"Hold still, keep your eyes on me," he said, reaching towards the nightstand. You watched as he dipped his fingers in your glass of water, pulling out one of the clear cubes.

You were about to ask what he was doing, when he pressed the cube to your sternum, a hiss leaving your lips. The cold took you off guard, but the second you adjusted to it, the relief was insane.

"Oh, fuck.. that's nice," you mumbled, your eyes fluttering shut as you relish in the feeling of something cold on your hot skin. You yelped when a hand smacked your thigh, your eyes shooting back open.

"I told you to keep your eyes on me," he reminded you, beginning to move the ice down. He ran it over your stomach, your hips, all the way down to your lower abdomen. You sighed when he moved it back up towards your chest, the feeling becoming better and better.

A lewd noise left your lips when he moved the cube across your chest, wet heat pooling between your legs. You whimpered softly, squirming under him. He smiled at the sound, repeating his actions.

"So pretty.. does that feel better? Hmm?" he cooed, his free hand beginning to pull down the boxers on your waist. He tugged them down your legs, tossing them onto the floor with your shirt. You just hummed affirmatively, unable to put together words as he pressed the cube down on your sensitive skin.

The cube he was holding eventually melted, and he leaned forward to retrieve another one. This time, however, he scooted himself down, parting your legs and groaning quietly.

"Shit, you're so fucking wet.. I've barely even started, honey," he teased, leaning forward to press a kiss to your inner thigh. He began running the cube along your mound, a low moan slipping from your lips as you tried to close your legs.

"Ah, ah.. keep them open, or I'll leave you tied up while you watch me get off," he threatened, your face turning bright red. He was being so dominant today, and it was insanely hot to watch.

"Y-yes, sir," you whined, your words going straight to his dick. You knew exactly how to get to him, and vice versa. He watched your face for a moment before his focus went back to his task, moving the ice cube farther down.

You jerked involuntarily when he pressed the cube gently against your throbbing clit, a low mewl escaping your lungs as you tugged against your restraints. You struggled to keep your eyes on him as he ran the cube up and down your heated middle, the ice melting faster now.

He continued his torture until the cube melted away, leaving you breathless. He pressed a small kiss to your clit, humming.

"See? That wasn't so bad.." he murmured. You breath out a heavy sigh, wishing you could touch him. The anticipation was killing you.

"Please j- oh!" you were cut off, his tongue licking a bold stripe up your aching cunt. He made a noise against you, the vibrations making your head spin. And just like that, you were burning hot all over again. He gripped your thighs tightly, his tongue moving slowly over you. You moaned lowly when his nose pressed against your clit, your mind foggy.

He was going nuts, eating you out like a starved man. You couldn't stop making loud, pleasured noises, tugging at the restraints to no avail. Even the sight of him with his head buried between your thighs was enough to make you whine, wishing you could reach down and touch him.

"Oh my god.. fuck, I'm gonna cum," you frantically speak, trying to squirm away from him. He tightens his grip on your legs, ignoring your warnings as he moaned against you. That was enough to tip you over the edge, the tight knot in your stomach snapping as your orgasm washed over you. Your legs shook involuntarily, your wrists red from pulling on the restraining fabric.

He pulled back, his mouth covered in your slick and a broad grin on his face. He licked his lips slowly, your chest heaving as you tried to catch your breath. "That was so hot," he said proudly, your face turning red as you breathed out an embarrassed whine. He snickered, leaning down and pressing a kiss to your lips. You kissed him back, the taste of yourself on his lips making your heart skip a beat.

"You did so good, baby. I'm gonna take this off.." he started, working to untie your wrists. He tossed the tie to the side, pulling your hands up and pressing a kiss to each of your inflamed wrists. He leaned down, burying his face in your neck and moving onto the bed so he was hovering over you. "..and then I'm gonna fuck you, angel," he purred against your neck, goosebumps erupting across your body.

"Please do," you begged, feeling his lips pressing along the skin of your neck, down to your shoulder. He hummed, sitting up with hooded eyes. You watched as he stood, kicked off his sweatpants, then settled back between your legs. He lined up with you, leaning down to start kissing you sweetly. While he had you distracted, he pushed in slowly, your lips parting as a pained moan sounded from your throat.

"I know, I know. I'm sorry," he muttered, trailing his kisses down to your throat. You winced as he pushed in inch by painful inch, until he was completely buried inside you. It took a minute, but your walls eventually relaxed around him. He sat back on his knees, staying inside you as he looked down at your heated face.

"Can I move?" he asked, pulling out slowly when you gave him a desperate look. "Y-yes," you gasped, his lips twitching into a smile. He held your hips tight, beginning to push in and out of you at a slow, steady pace. Your head fell back against the pillows as you moaned lowly. your hands rested on his, loving how he held you with such a bruising grip.

"Fuck, you're so tight," he moaned, making your stomach erupt with butterflies. You loved when he made noise, it was the most beautiful sound. You squeezed around him gently, just to hear one of those moans again. His breath started to shake, his fingers practically boring into your skin now as his pace picked up.

"Ah- Jack," you whimpered, the pleasure drowning you. He was so intoxicating, and he looked so beautiful. He groaned, dipping his head down for a messy kiss while he began to fuck you faster. His thrusts had more force in them now, making your eyes tear up from the intense pleasure. He moaned into your lips, his dick beginning to brush against a spot inside you that made you shudder and gasp, a whole new pleasure filling you.

He pulled back, shifting his angle. "What? Right there? Fuck, Y/N," he moaned, intentionally hitting that spot over and over. He fucked you like his life depended on it, his moans slowly becoming more whiny.

You were seeing stars, lewd moans pouring from your swollen lips as you began to clench around him. "I'm close again, shit," you mewled, feeling him bury his face in your neck yet again.

"Me too, ," he panted, his thrusts getting sloppy as he neared his release as well. You held your orgasm back as best as you could, but you couldn't take it anymore. With a loud cry, you came all around his dick, your eyes rolling back and your legs shaking like mad.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck, oh," his hips stuttered as he pushed himself as deep as he could, his head falling back snd his eyes fluttering shut. His moans were noisy and dulcet, making your abdomen flutter subtly.

He pulled out slowly, and you whimpered quietly at the emptiness that washed over you. Jack began pressing kisses all over your face, not caring about the thin layer of sweat between the two of you.

"I love you," he mumbled, nipping at your bottom lip before kissing you tenderly. "I love you, too," you replied, muffled by his needy lips. You laughed when he started running his hands down again, grabbing them and pushing them away.

"Aww, c'mon angel. We can go another round," he mumbled, a sheepish grin on his face as he leaned down to kiss you. "No, Jack, the repairman will be here soon. I just want a cold shower," you giggle, and he groans. He stands up, grabbing his sweats and tugging them on.

"Alright, alright, I'll go get it running.. you look beautiful, by the way," he winked, and your face turned bright red. You sighed, shoving your face into your pillows to muffle your excited giggles. God, you loved him..

**

A/N: the poll was tied between jack and charlie, so i just chose between the two 💕 i hope you liked it! i will come back and edit any mistakes soon <3. happy scrolling :).

[idrellegames]

How do you maintain love in your playerbase knowing that some of the people there are the same selfish people who are leaking or trying to leak/pirate the hard work of indie devs and writers? Ngl my project was nowhere near as big and popular as yours but something like that happened to me and I slowly lost interest in my project. I still keep up with IFs I like but can't ever seem to manifest the interest and love I used to have for my work after it happened the first time. People say things like giving up is just "letting them win" or that we should just be happy that someone out there enjoys our game and hearing "reasons" like that make me realize it's hopeless to get any respect for my work

First of all, I'm really sorry your project got leaked. It is an unfortunate side of being a creator - especially an online one. Regardless of the form, regardless of whether you're an hobbyist or a professional, art is a hot commodity. People want high quality entertainment, but they don't want to pay for it.

I've been avoiding addressing the IF leaks outside of this post because I don't think it's productive to throw any more attention on the situation. Leaks happen, they are always going to happen--if someone wants something and they can't afford it or don't want to pay for it and they want it badly enough, they will find a loophole. At the end of the day, it's a very small community of people who are pirating and shoving them into the spotlight is only going to draw more people who were maybe on the fence about downloading pirated content into doing it.

I am pretty steeled when it comes to this topic now. IF isn't the only place where I have experienced my work being leaked. I come from a theatre background and it is very easy for your original work to get produced without you even knowing about it.

A show I worked on in 2012 has its script available online as part of the library of the university where it was produced. My co-writer and I don't collect royalties from it; the intention is for it to remain free to produce for amateur and university companies. However, because of the political and sensitive nature of the script, my co-writer is very adamant about directors contacting her for permission to produce it and to follow certain guidelines before putting it on. Learning about a production in Australia months after the show closed didn't feel great. It wasn't about money, it was about ethics.

With the IF leaks specifically, I think there's a bit of a disconnect happening here between the people who want to play the games and how they view the indie creator who made them. They see paying a Patreon sub as the same as paying a big company for a product, and if they can't afford to pay it or if they don't want to, then no harm is done by pirating it.

But that's not what the relationship is.

Patreon is not paying for a product, it is supporting the creator's livelihood. I am extremely grateful for my patrons. A game the size of Wayfarer is not something that can feasibly be done in the spare moments between day jobs. But capitalism stops for no one and to make this game, I need to be able to afford rent and groceries. A living wage, as some would say.

Are leaks disheartening? Yes. But I also think that people who play pirated content were never going to sub to Patreon in the first place. And, as mentioned earlier, the number of people involved is relatively small. Thankfully, I'm not that much at risk of leaks actually affecting my income at the moment. But I would be concerned and would take a firmer stance if you Googled Wayfarer and the first search result was a pirated copy (and then I would probably follow the appropriate steps to have that result taken down from the search results).

I think the worst thing you can do as a creator is confront leakers directly. That is only going to blow back on you and put more of a spotlight on the fact that your work is getting leaked. I much would rather focus my time and energy on encouraging my community not to pirate my content than chasing down leakers and making PSAs about it.

For the folks who can't afford a Patreon sub or to anyone considering pirating my content, I would encourage you to apply to be playtesters when applications are open. If you bug test for me, then you can play the alpha content for free.

Outside of that, I take measures to protect my work as much as I can. It's not a perfect system (I don't think it's possible to make your work 100% pirating proof - if people want it badly enough, they will find a way to get it), but I know I've done as much as I can and I am content with that. I don't let it bother me. I have more important things to do with my time.

And for the people who do pirate my work - Bravo! Congratulations! It's very entertaining how petty you are.

[starlightswordfight]

PLANET HEADCANONS TIME. WE ARE NEVER GETTING OUT OF HERE

can't wait for the garden site to update while I'm not looking and immediately debunk EVERYTHING that i'm about to write

ALSO THESE FIRST FEW MIGHT BE A LITTLE HEAVY. REFERENCES TO REAL WORLD ISSUES (ENVIRONMENTAL, WORK CLIMATE, ETC) EVEN IF IT'S NOT THAT EXPLICIT. I WILL PUT WHERE IT GETS MORE LIGHTHEARTED AGAIN!! IT WILL BE IN BIG TEXT LIKE THIS

it's (mostly) nothing you'd see that isn't already in pikmin lore somewhere but better safe than sorry

– that all said, karut is a very small planet. I don't have a lot for this one. the population just is very low!! tiny. and knowing that it's a sister planet to koppai canonically makes things a LOT more interesting

– my personal hc! is that civilization on both of those planets was initially only on karut. the climate or the living conditions on karut may have been extreme enough for most people to leave for koppai instead. were things always like that? no. dw about it

– and the resources present on koppai are so much more plentiful! and the environment is still perfect for life! and for hundreds of years they thrive there!

– until they don't

– as karut restabilizes, slowly, with those who stayed behind completely changing their tactics and becoming very heavily focused on planning now, koppai begins to deteriorate in some aspects, the most glaring issue being the rapidly impending food crisis. the people responsible for managing those resources (govt, anyone directly involved in resource management jobs) are still working off of centuries of nonrenewable practices, including a complete Lack of agriculture where it matters

– all this to say that pikmin 3 was already subtly making the case for "hey! you guys wouldn't have had to do this if you just relied on renewable methods of using the things you need for survival!!" which I was so genuinely going to do my ap research project on when I was in high school but I never did the class because I failed seminar

– basically karut is to koppai what earth is to mars and you can't run from an issue that you exclusively caused and it's gonna follow you and Boy Did It Follow

– genetically koppaites and people from karut look very similar also!! rounded ears, lightweight suits unless you're Player Character in the rescue corps, things like that. they also have similar styles and forms of expression, with minor differences!

– the h in hocotate is for hustle culture

– going to interpret hocotate as another criticism of similar environmental issues just from a different angle. I am certain that the writers were Not going for that whatsoever and I'm reaching so hard my arms are falling off but I don't care

– hocotate is already implied to be more heavily industrialized in some places, judging from the scenery we see. i don't know if it's exclusively corporate heads like the freight president that have such an intense focus on profit over all else (though in that case specifically there HAS to be because the company is in DEBT) (but also olimar sees managers as soulless but i digress), but i could easily see there being a heavy consumerism thing going on over there

– environmental studies, or careers, or the environment itself, is valued, but not considered as important as business and the advancement of civilization by the people in charge of those businesses that could actually take big steps to preserve it, and much faster. blame is, of course, put on hocotatian citizens when things start getting bad

– bringing previous hcs into this! this is why olimar is not a biologist or in a similar field despite knowing so much about it for a freight employee by the way. job outlooks are lower, or at the very least the positions are HEAVILY discouraged because they aren't as steady anymore as some others. it wouldn't be a stable source of income like the one he has now would be, and he basically got stuck. I mention this because it happens to a LOT of people here

– there are ongoing discussions and movements around it now, and around the work culture of the planet that causes predicaments like olimar's and louie's to happen so fucking much, but it was BAD before and definitely still has a long way to go. it's kind of at that point where people there are just now realizing that "oh, hey, this is like. fucked. to be honest"

– ocobo's storms, specifically, involve water-centric natural disasters. it is hurricane central in that bitch. the other florida of the pikminverse

– planet tagwa is actually near ocobo, and their orbital pathways are similar! kinda like Another sister planet deal perhaps

– both planets have several moons and let me tell you high tide gets CRAZY

– life is adapted to be more aquatic in nature; think like splatoon but not as obvious maybe (I have never played or watched someone play splatoon once in my life). marine species that the person is similar to depends on the region of the planet they live on. this applies to ocobo and tagwa

– they also have similar struggles with water quality, with slightly varied causes. tagwa's water supply is undrinkable due to the salinity levels being too high, as a result of rising global temperatures. meanwhile ocobo's constant storm problem make it incredibly difficult to regulate the water there, despite how much of it they have. this issue is worsening Also because of rising global temperatures. this is not either of their faults, it is just Happening

– pnf-404 has a big dent in the earth. just a good chunk taken right out, adventure time style

– past unsustainable human activity violated the majority of its planetary boundaries, and this led ultimately to the ending of human civilization. whether it resulted in travel somewhere else or in dying off is up in the air

– nature, as it does, regulates itself in every system. once harmful input from people on a mass scale stopped, it was able to bring itself back to working and even thriving conditions, though this took a very long time

– the new life has adapted around formerly very hostile conditions, which is the reason it's so strange and unheard of on other planets, even to those with biology interests such as olimar. things that previously could not be even dreamed of from the wildlife are now not only possible, but the norm

– many many plants adapted to gain consumer-like traits, and vice versa. the pikmin are bizarre when comparing it to real life species or to other planets in pikmin, but on pnf-404 they're actually completely ordinary

– sea urchin pikmin are real too !! sea urchin pikmin that I NEVER FUCKING POSTED expect that soon maybe

OKAY WE'RE NORMAL AGAIN NOW. DISCUSSION IS MUCH LIGHTER FROM HERE OUT

– sozor is one of the least industrialized planets, if not the least, by a long shot!! there is no major "separation" from wildlife (things like wildlife bridges/crossings and designated protected habitat areas are abundant), and its environmental protection policies are very strict.

– EVEN STRICTER NO GAMBLING POLICY DON'T ASK WHY DON'T EVEN WORRY

– the culture is not a collective one. people on sozor are very individualistic, which I adopted from that one giant post that compiled the information we know about the castaways and the planets which I will link here somewhere [I CAN'T FIND IT BUT I'LL ADD IT WHEN I DO]

– ohri is either the florida or the australia of the pikminverse planets and you are just going to have to trust me when I say that

– one day the environment is going to reclaim it and they will have no one to blame but themselves

– the climate can be hard to predict. ohri is really really good at not being the expected temperature in a given season, and it just does this whenever it wants to be so honest. it gets a little hectic

– it's referenced on the garden site that ohrians tend to be tougher and I fully think that it's because of the environment. even socioculturally, a lot of facets of life like academics and work are a lot more intense or high-stakes. people on ohri on average are said to go above and beyond, setting records galaxywide, but the planet also reports very high levels of stress, right up there with hocotate

– on the opposite side of things! ooji's population is considered one of the happiest!!

– ooji gets a lot of its income through agriculture; it's what's been holding the economy up. research into other prominent fields such as environmental studies and botany have encouraged those working in agriculture to shift to more sustainable practice

– giya is a melting pot. a good deal of different people end up there at some point for one reason or another

– this is especially true for koppai! and given the abundance of koppaite text utilized by the rescue corps, which started ON giya, I Think there's a deeper correlation there but I could not for the life of me work that out for you yet

– okay so the colony canonically has? walls?? but WHY?? DOES IT HAVE WALLS????? is evil shadow skull out there waiting to get their asses or something???? climb up to the top to see what's out there and Ope, Here Comes The Lich

– if any of you have watched adventure time I'm picturing this as like an islands scenario. like a "oh, the place is mostly safe, we just uh were Not allowed to leave for a very long time though." safety vs freedom was probably historically something that got grappled with a lot while the planet was still being settled on, and while people CAN and actively do leave and come back now, the walls are still there

– also dogs are everywhere it is inevitable very awesome no escape

– why is everyone on nijo bird coded why is everyone saying this WHAT is HAPPENING around here

– summer and winter stretch out very long for that planet, and look vastly different. summer has very little dark nighttime, and in winter you will rarely see the sun

– the gravity on nijo is lighter on average than it is in other planets! this allows for less force to be needed during takeoffs for flights, however it also causes reduced friction, so pilots on nijo have to be more careful

– the reduced weight of many objects also implies that architecture and general tools are made of different material than we have, with a density that won't allow it all to just float off. these things when taken to other planets are MUCH heavier there

– temperatures on siguray are extreme in every way they can be, not unlike most deserts. when it's hot it is scorching and when it's cold it is frigid

– day and night tends to cycle like that

– wind, uh. wind would be a huge problem. sand everywhere

– due to how hectic the weather can get on such a short notice, many who do not Have to be out and about are encouraged to stay inside. alternatives to schooling, for example -- remote learning programs -- are prominent on siguray for the people's safety

– there is such a focus on material objects with people from siguray (treasure collecting, geology, archaeology) because those types of studies and businesses and the like are heavily normalized on a planet like this. there isn't far much else happening in most areas, so it's not only normal to have a sort of interest and expertise in that, but it is expected that you do

– koppai and siguray have a consistent trading relationship. certain koppaites in particular will especially trade out treasures for food items (dobbs) (dobbs in particular)

– koodgio's culture is art and expression-centric, though artistic voice has been dwindling more over the years and becoming more commercialized. art by some is viewed as product rather than passion, and this has a detrimental effect on the artists there

– ogura has a lot of water on it!! marine biomes are heavy in this world. yes I'm doing this exclusively to write for an oc do not even worry about it

– ogura also has two moons because I think that's awesome

– the brightness, in comparison to earth, would be around what it is on pluto! ogura's light is a lot gentler and dimmer due to a greater distance from their respective star. the mellow light is easy on the eyes, but also makes the planet colder on average, and everyone bundles up far more as a result. buildings got more insulation or whatever it's called

– this has the very unfortunate effect of BLINDING EVERYBODY when they go to OTHER PLANETS

– both the research task force HQ and the interstellar federation main location are on mihama

– mihama is at the closest point to the center of the galaxy. not that the other planets "orbit" it, I don't think that's possible, but the varying solar systems IN that galaxy tend to lap around and be at a point around mihama in some way

– when I picture mihama I picture it to be very dark. could not begin to tell you why. daytime is dim and short

[snek-panini]

At long last, I have a new book to share! Feels like forever since the last one. This is Vita Nova, a fantastic Good Omens fic by @philoomenaa that I asked to bind way back in October. It took me a while to get here and I learned several new techniques for this bind but it was so very worth the wait. It's an excellent pre-season 2 story from 2019-2020, involving the fandom's favorites dealing with an unexpected bout of both humanity and memory loss. It's just...really really good and I love it.

More photos and process talk under the cut! There are a lot of details to see with this one.

One of the things I learned for this bind was homemade book cloth. I used the heat n bond method and had pretty good results with this satiny bronze cloth that I found in the Joann's remnant bin. The making of the cloth was fairly straightforward but it handles very differently to regular book cloth. The satin is really slippery and absolutely would not hold a crease at the hinge. I think it also shrank a little at the gluing stage? Which sounds weird but I left my usual amount of space for the corner turn-ins but still had teeny tiny gaps on three of the corners, which has never happened to me before. I also had an issue with glue seepage when I applied HTV to the cover and spine. You can see this in the images above, and here in the spine photos:

Part of the reason it has that fancy art nouveau frame on the cover is an attempt to hide this. I think it's the heat press re-activating the heat n bond to cause it. I found out two things here: that fabric requires less press time than book cloth or cardstock, and that if you move the heat press slowly but constantly like an iron it is way less likely to do this. I was super disappointed that it happened but now, a few days later, it doesn't seems so bad. I guess some items just come with a little personal history already baked in.

Here, have some more glamour shots:

The geometric endpapers were chosen specifically to go with this cloth. I found them at the same craft store and knew I had use them together, they look so incredible. And I learned edge gilding for this project! It was very annoying. The final result here is with heat transfer foil, and I did about six tests on scrap text blocks before I got a result I was at all satisfied with. I tried rub n buff (great coverage, not shiny enough, kept coming off on my fingers even after curing for 2 days) and an actual gilding kit (flaked off as soon as I separated the pages). The heat foil still has some patchy spots but was by far the best-looking result. I also learned double-core end bands for this project! Because I wanted some kind of match for those opulent endpapers and didn't want to settle for just two colors. I think they came out pretty well for a first try and I'll definitely be doing them again.

Couple of photos of the ribbon I chose for the bookmark. It's probably a little too wide for a book this length; you can see in the end band photo that I had to fold it in half to get it to lay in the spine properly. But it looks so good with the other design elements that I couldn't resist. Luxury all the way on this one.

Speaking of luxury, have a look at the interior:

From left to right, we have the title page, the ornament I chose for the chapter numbers, and the scene break divider. All the images came from rawpixel with just the lightest amount of editing from me. The chapter image is the same as the star on the title page, but I made it gray and took out the center to turn it into a frame for the numbers. The cloth and endpapers really set the tone for this one all the way through, and all the other design choices followed from there. It's really gorgeous, guys. I love it so much.

And that's it! That was the last work in progress I had from 2023, and I'm so pleased to have finally finished it. Hope you like it, AMidnightDreary!

[entomolog-t]

Ohh we’re being evaluated huh?

My favorite scenarios are ones involving curious giants and tinies that desperately want to run away but can’t

A tiny is trapped and a giant finds them, helping them out of the trap and offering safety, food, even letting them go. The tiny is suspicious— what could this giant possibly want? There’s no way that they’re just being kind for the sake of it, everything they’d ever been told suggested that all giants were evil and they should be dead or in a jar right now. The tentative curiosity and choice to stay of the tiny toasts my eggs and scrambles my bread. The initial terror turned confusion turned curiosity turned delight. Mwah, chef’s kiss.

Also the reverse, where a giant who hates tinies gets stuck with one and slowly comes to realize that they absolutely adore them. I love those equally as much.

Dying to know if this says anything about me, assuming you’re still doing these ^^ /nf

BACK IN OFFICE BABY

This is quite the interesting scenario to discect.

So the main theme of note would be subverted expectations- interestingly, this tends to crop up quite frequently in G/t media.

Typically, this can imply some sort of projection of the self, or some reframing of another.

The main thing I would suggest to consider are the traits associated with the giant, as well as what the tiny/and possibly others think of the giant.

Even if you are more tiny aligned, I would still take the time to consider what traits are shown, and ask yourself if any of those reflect personal feelings.

A regularly occurring theme is to project ones own attributes that we see as misunderstood or overlooked onto the giant. Being shy, or intimidating can lead to us feeling unapproachable, and plant that seed in our subconscious that "If only someone got to know me, they would see that I'm [Defining Trait]"

Though that is certainly not the only route. There is another common trend in G/t, and fantasy as a whole, to reframe negative emotions- even fantasizing a different resolution. Do the "scary" traits of the giant remind you of a time you were wronged by someone? It might be that your brain is trying to reframe it to help with coping. The reframing allows for fantastical leeway to suggest they were not actually wronging you- their intentions were just misunderstood. Those thoughts help the mind to feel more in control because it shifts the blame from someone not liking you or intentionally hurting you to being a misunderstanding- a far more comforting concept that being malicious.

Reframing doesn't have to just occur with the giant archetype either. The tiny holds bias and preconceived notions of how they anticipate someone "dangerous" to act. Does the tiny remind you of anyone? perhaps someone that judged you over something you could not change?

As weird as it may be to say, the brain likes metaphors. There is a great deal of meaning within our subconscious imagery. Peeling back the layers and trying to determine what each character represent is quite the peak into the inner workings of our psyches.

Theres also another very interesting projection that could be occurring on the tiny. Do they share any negative or mistaken traits? Are these traits mirroring traits of your own?

The fact the tiny cannot comprehend why someone would be nice for the sake of being nice to them could be very telling about our own internal self reflection- and its important to analyze what traits of our own we might see of as unworthy of unconditional love/kindness.

I hope this breakdown could offer you some insight into the inner workings of this dynamic trope!

Thank you for attending this session, please see my secretary on the way out to book any follow up appointments.

[viperwhispered]

I'm sorry this has been brewing in my head for a while and I need to share it with someone: Jamil and Kalim teaming up to topple to classist society of the scalding sands.

Post-OB Jamil and Kalim actually reconciling and having some character development. Kalim breaking down realizing that his coping mechanism of obliviousness did more harm than good. Jamil actually missing his friend. Both realizing that the problem isn't just their own flaws, but the adults around them. Jamil working on letting himself go while Kalim works to become more independant (he clearly has the skill + learning capacity, he's just been so babied he never learnt). Also, adorable scenario where Kalim and Malleus become besties over their shared quest for independence. Based on this, this, this, and this.

Kalim and Jamil's relationship becoming more genuine. Honestly, I believe that Kalim will end up sooooo sassy cause of Jamil's infleunce. Jamil using his sharp tongue and Kalim trying to do comebacks. Jamil just responds by giving a rating out of 10. Jamil finally getting the personal time he so desperately needed while Kalim slowly learns to genuinely trust others with his problems. Kalim finally letting himself get genuinely angry at his parents for how they managed to ruin both his and Jamil's lives by trapping them in a codependant cycle.

Kalim getting into his first fist fight with some classist prick and Jamil's response is asking if he won.

Kalim saying something very stupid and Jamil just giving a glare and it goes like this.

Third year rolls around and the two successfully schemed to give Jamil his rightful title of dorm leader without the nobles of the Scalding Sands rioting. I don't know how yet but I know it'll involve Kalim maxing out his "innocent puppy who just wants to do what's right" to indirectly shame his father for bribing Kalim's way into power. Nothing really changes much other than the fact that Scarabia is now running much more smoothly while still having the best parties. Based on this, this, and this.

They graduate and Kalim instantly gives Jamil the go ahead to be free. It all happens so fast that none has time to protest. Jamil spends a good two years traveling while Kalim does his best to learn the ropes as being head of the family. Based on this and this. Kalim successfully setting up a trade deal with Malleus and helping to open up Briar Valley to modernization. Jamil making a name for himself by taking part in multiple projects as he travels (archeological sites, restoration projects, reformation movements, etc).

The two reuniting when they're both called to work with Leona for his relief project in the slums of the savanna as part of his political reformation of the monarchy. Jamil helping to oragnize + plan the logistics while Kalim provides funding + trade opportunities. By the end of it, the slums have turned into a major tourist stop in the middle of a major trade route (sorry for the side quest, I have a thing for Leona keeping his promise to Ruggie).

Extra context: the position of grand vizier is traditionally given to relatives of the family head, like a brother or cousin. Ever since Jamil left, the position was taken by one of Kalim's distant relatives. This guy absolutely sucks at his job, is a classist ass, and clearly only had superficial training. Its clear he only got the title cause of his relation to Kalim and never expected to do much work. Kalim having to fix this guy's messes for years and being like "oh god is this what Jamil had to go through with me?".

Back to the story, Kalim spent years kneecaping the nobility with relative success and now has the ideal circumstances for an ideological revolution. But for this, he needs Jamil. So he invites Jamil, now famous worldwide for his sills & contributions, to come back for the fireworks festival. There, in front of all the major noble families (plus a few ex-classmates like Vil, Leona, Azul, and Malleus who're there for support), Kalim begins to berate his vizier and expose him for his incompetance and blunders, ultimately dismissing him. Then he turns to Jamil, gets on his knees, and begs that he take the position because he's the most competant person in the room. Jamil revels in the ego boost that is Kalim kneeling and agrees so long as he can negotiate his contract.

The two then go on a relentless campaign to topple the classist bullshit nobility and give equal rights to everybody.

Which brings me to the x reader romance scenarios (lets say thry discovered a way to travel to & from the reader's world):

Jamil marrying and taking his S/O's last name for an "official excuse" to give him his freedom. The Vipers may be endentured servants to the Asims but the L/Ns have no such obligation. During his travels, Jamil switching between staying in a shabby hotel and spending the night at his in-laws. His S/O being his rock and offering boundless support and patience. When Jamil finally gets the title of grand Vizier, he rejoices at the thought of finally spoiling his S/O like they deserve.

Kalim marrying an S/O who is both a sweetheart but also a maverick unafraid to do the dirty work. One who makes kneecaping the nobility a whole lot easier and puts an end to 90% of all assassination attempts. Kalim having absolute trust in his S/O and their methods. Kalim being relieved that any children they have will also go to school in his S/O's world where they'll be safe and able to live somewhat normal lives. Kalim being determined to reform society so their children can live without fear or hatred.

This took me a little while to get to since I wanted to give all of this a proper thought, but here we are.

Ngl, as a sucker for happy endings it is lovely thinking of how things could work out.

Honestly, just for Jamil and Kalim to open up more to each other would take quite a bit of work. I mean, years of habits to unlearn and years of baggage to navigate through. I really wish they would, though - and not just when one of them is overblotting. Plenty of learning for Kalim to figure out how to face the things he’s been shielded from, and for Jamil to express the things he’s been bottling up.

Oh but that thought of Kalim “sassing up” because of Jamil is so amusing tho. Him trying to emulate Jamil, which would just get Jamil even more frustrated - is Kalim even going to take this from him now? Or Jamil would just be amused at the attempt, one or the other. But if they could actually get more on the same wavelength about it, that could indeed make for some real fun scenarios.

As for Kalim’s parents… Yeah don’t even get me started on that one.

For Jamil becoming the housewarden… Yeah that first pic kinda sums it up, doesn’t it?

Which makes me wonder: how much does Jamil want the power, and how much does he just want the recognition? Now my memories of book 4 may be a little fuzzy at this point, but iirc the primary motivation was to eject Kalim - to get back the blissful solace of those first few months in NRC without Kalim there. So I do feel like just being allowed to "flourish" and show off his skills and capabilities would be some balm for the wounds in his soul, so to speak.

But also, considering Kalim was able to transfer schools just because of Jamil, pretty much, I’m sure if it’s up to him he’d be well able to give dorm leadership to Jamil without too much fuss. Like, I wouldn’t be surprised if he got the position more because of a “only the best for my boy” attitude from his dad - or maybe it was supposed to be training for his future responsibilities as the head of the house.

In any case, I would assume the family wouldn’t be super upset if Kalim is the one deciding that actually, Jamil should lead. Like, it certainly goes over much smoother if Kalim instigates it and hands the position over, rather than Jamil rising up against him (because how could a servant possibly oppose his master, how dare). Tho it would certainly still raise some eyebrows, I’m sure.

(But like, while Kalim presumably has had to deal with his own brand of neglect / not so helpful upbringing, he still seems to be the sort of a golden boy who’s used to getting his whims, so.)

For Jamil being freed - to my understanding they would need to figure out a way to do it without it bringing shame / consequences to Jamil’s family (at least, based on how jp talked about these things). Like, Kalim would need to be “powerful” enough in his family to be able to shield / protect Jamil’s family from those consequences.

(As a sidenote, I do wonder how Jamil’s family would feel like being offered freedom from servitude / a different position. Are they under as intense pressure as Jamil, with their own roles? I mean, obviously it would be difficult for them to be let go without having a way to make ends meet, but I do wonder if they’re simply happy & proud of their positions or if they feel anything similar to what Jamil does.)

At some point I also made a post thinking that even if Kalim might not be able to dismiss Jamil outright (once they both come to an agreement about this being a thing they should do), maybe Kalim could still make up reasons to send Jamil out to travel. A halfway point to true freedom, and hey, at least Jamil would get to enjoy spending some Asim money for himself.

Ngl tho, I’m all for a bit of an upheaval of the social order in the Scalding Sands. Really don’t know how one could even go about making it happen - such change is slow, would paint an even bigger target on Kalim’s back, and would make for some very powerful enemies. Slow process more than a revolution.

Though, decent labor laws and prohibition for child labor sure would be a good start, considering what Jamil went through.

Jamil would absolutely get an ego boost from that situation indeed of Kalim asking for Jamil's help, but I do wonder if he really would want to tie himself to the Asims / Kalim again. Interesting to ponder just what would have to change for that to happen.

But the allure of power might indeed be enough. Now, how interested Jamil would be to effect change at large, and how much he's concerned about his own personal position... I mean, we've seen him very willing to use others, and his experiences (for a reason) have left him in a mindset that probably means seeing power equaling freedom and also as viewing the world as haves and have-nots. So he'd definitely need to start having more concern for others (and not just the people he cares about, like his family) to really be genuinely interested and helpful to the cause.

I’ve never really considered / seen a concept of the twst guys living in a different world than their s/o but still regularly traveling to see each other, that’s interesting 👀 I do love the idea of Kalim with a fierce protective s/o tho.

Ngl, there was a lot to chew over here, but interesting thoughts about the potential futures. I also have to admit that I’ve put much less thought into understanding Kalim than I’ve put to Jamil, so I’m very much open to rebuttals about any of my interpretations about him.

It really is a shame that so far, books 5 and 6 only gave us glimpses of change with these two. Like Jamil being a little bit more willing to let Kalim actually do things or help. I know, I know, it can't possibly happen overnight, but pls, give us something to see if and how things are changing - or if we're just stuck in a new, precarious status quo.

Also I don't know if you've been making posts in your blog developing these ideas but like you definitely should, if you've got this much of a concept. I'm sure others would be interested too.

ETA: forgot to say, but I think for societal change, Kalim certainly would have the funds for lobbying and charitable work. And he does have his own kind of charisma to keep that sort of stuff together, too.

Also for the kids with our world s/o... That certainly would make inheritance and things interesting in the future. Sure, if Kalim has his as you outlined, there would not be so much of a position as the family head to inherit, but still.

Not to even mention the whole literally growing up between two different worlds.

[atinytease08]

Accident with consequences...[P.J]

˜”*°•.˜”*°•.•°*”˜.•°*”˜˜”*°•.˜”*°•.•°*”˜.•°*”˜

SUMMERY - You weren't a commonly disliked person but for some reason you can't seem to make him like you, so you decide to deny your feelings and hate him, just like he hates you. But when you got involved in a car accident, everything changed. In emergencies even the biggest enimies can become friends...or even more?

GENRE - enemies to lovers, college au, smut

WARNINGS - car accident, some mentionings of blood, smut ;)

NOTES - ///

"Oh, wow...", you huffed and rolled your eyes when you saw the list that was laying in front of you.

"What am I supposed to say?", he hissed and combed through his silky hair with his fingers,"Now I'm stuck with you."

You sighed.

Park Jongseong, or Jay as everyone called him, wasn't very fond of you and had absolutely no intentions of hiding it. You didn't know why and to be honest it really hurt at times since you actually really liked him in the beginning.

But you knew you deserved better than an asshole like him, so you decided to keep your feelings to yourself and lock them away. Now, instead of your love, there was a forced hatred that filled its place.

Although you tried to keep your distance, it was just your luck that your teacher decided to team you up for the upcoming project. Since you weren't going to work with your friends most of the time in the future, your teacher wanted you to learn how to work with strangers which made sense, although you still didn't want to work with Jay.

"Don't be such a bitch about it. This project counts 30% of our final grade so I don't really care what you do, but I need to get a good grade.", you practically spat back.

"You don't think I want to get a good grade?", he rolled his eyes, "You're the one annoying me."

"What? No, you started!"

"Not true."

"You little-"

Sometimes you just wanted to twist his fucking head off.

But you were in college and not kindergarden after all so you didn't see why you should have to deal with his behaviour.

"Doesn't matter. When are you free to start?", you asked, pushing your anger aside. It wasn't easy being the bigger person.

"Tomorrow after class?", he asked and you nodded.

"We can go to my place. There no one can interrupt or bother us.", he winked.

"The hell is wrong with you...", you mumbled. You didn't want to admit how much his simple words affected you, so you looked away to hide the blush that crept up your cheeks.

You didn't actually fall for him. It's just that his sudden statement caught you off guard. Yeah, that must be it...right?

"Fine, my roommate is too noisy anyways, she wouldn't leave us alone..."

"Then see you tomorrow.", he said in his typical annoyed voice as he got up and left.

You furrowed your brows. You really couldn't tell what he was thinking and why he was acting like this.

"What's his deal anyways?"

[...]

You had packed your stuff and left your dorms as you were now on your way to Jays flat. He had sent you the adress and simply by the location of it, you could tell that he had money.

"Of course he's rich...", you rolled your eyes. You looked at your phone one last time before crossing the green light.

Suddenly, out of nowhere, a car started speeding towards you. You were caught like a deer in head lights.

You had seen this multiple times before in movies, where the main character freezes in place and you had wondered why they wouldn't get off the street but now you could finally understand why.

You tried to move, your thoughts kept yelling at you, but anxiety took over, making your body not move an inch.

Everything suddenly was in slow motion as the car hit you. You flew through the air, hitting the cold ground underneath.

The taste of blood filled your mouth and your whole body ached. Someone was calling out for you but before you could make out who it was, your mind started slipping away.

[...]

You slowly opened your eyes, the bright light causing you to furrow your eyebrows.

"Y/n, you're awake!", you heard your roomate saying.

You turned your head to look at her.

"What happened?"

Your throath was as dry as a desert.

"Some asshole speeded because he thought he could still cross over while it was green although it was red! I swear to god, if I catch him-", she held her fist in the air, "Can you believe it?! He just drove away and left you there! I'm so glad there was a wittness who called an ambulance!"

You smiled at her softly.

"Let me just get a doctor!"

Like that she got up and left. After some minutes she came back with another two people following her.

"Ah, I see you're awake.", the doctor smiled, "How are we feeling?"

"To be honest, I just have a bad headache right now..."

"You were lucky, you know? You somehow managed to get away with some small wounds and cuts but nothing too serious.", the doctor explained,"Just get a good rest, just in case anything happens, we are still keeping you here until tomorrow."

You nodded and thanked her, before she left you alone with your roommate.

"I'm so glad it's nothing too serious!", she exclaimed.

"Same..."

"I'm just going to let you rest, I'm going to pick you up tomorrow and drive you home.", she winked at you and you looked at her in awe.

"Naw, thank you! You're an angel~", you said,"See you tomorrow!"

[...]

Three days had passed since the accident and you were as good as new, except for the fact that it was going to take a while for you to be able to enter a car. Well...

You were sitting on your bed, as a wave of guilt overcame you. You hadn't been able to cancel your meeting with Jay but you also couldn't text him because your phone broke when the car hit you.

You knew it wasn't your fault and yet you felt responsible for not helping him with the project. You were the one warning him to not be lazy in the first place, although you ended up not doing anything.

"Y/n?", you suddenly heard your roommate say.

"Yeah?"

"I've been calling you four times already!"

"Oh, sorry...I was lost in my thoughts...", you smiled at her apologizing.

"Don't worry 'bout it. Just wanted to tell you that dinner is ready if you're hungry."

"Thanks."

She wanted to leave but then hesitated. You furrowed your brows.

"Is something wrong?", you asked.

"Well, I was just wondering...Who was that guy in the hospital? Do you have a secret boyfriend or something?"

"What?!", you snorted in disbelief,"What guy?"

"There was a guy- Quite tall, dark brown middle part, sharp nose and jawline, kinda hot..."

The more she described him, the clearer the picture of who she was talking about became.

But it couldn't be, could it?!

"I think he was the one who called the ambulance. He was by your side the whole time until shortly before you woke up."

"You're kidding, right?!"

"I'm not", she shrugged,"He seemed very concerned about you..."

"Sorry, I think dinner has to wait, I need to talk to a specific person.", you said hastily as you jumped up and started getting ready.

"Okayy, just text me if you're going to stay at his place~", she winked at you teasingly causing you to roll your eyes to hide your deep blush.

"Oh, come on!"

Without giving much thought to it, you grabbed your things and left.

Had Jay really been the one who called an ambulence? Had he really been the one who was by your side the whole time and cared for you?

You ran as fast as you could to Jay's flat. It was already quite late, but still, you hoped that he was home.

When you stood in front of his door, you knocked until someone finally opened.

When you saw him, you couldn't believe your eyes. His dark hair was wet and messy, single strands falling into his face. He was wearing a tanktop, a towl was laying over his shoulder. On top of that was he wearing his shorts which matched perfectly.

How could someone look that good in such a simple outfit? Nevermind, you weren't here to thirst over him anyways...

When he saw you, he leaned onto the door frame and looked you up and down.

"Y/n, I think you're about three days too late for our meeting.", he scoffed,"What are you doing here?"

Maybe you were stupid and it hadn't been him, but before you could let your doubt take over, your mouth started talking.

"I-I came to thank you..."

He furrowed his brows.

"Come in", he demanded and turned around. You took off your shoes and followed him quietly until you both sat down on his couch.

"As I said, I came here to thank you.", you repeated. His dark eyes were staring right into yours, making your heart skip a beat,"My roommate told me you were the one who called an ambulance..."

"It was just a coincidence, I just came back from the grocery store around the corner and happened to wittness it", he shrugged.

"Then why did you stay with me the whole night? You didn't have to..."

"What would you do if someone was hit by a car and no one showed up for you?", he rolled his eyes,"And besides, I still need you for our project. I wasn't planning on doing it alone."

Just why was he acting like this?

"I was hit by a fucking car, but you did this because you were being selfish? You really didn't care about me?", you asked anger and disappointment bubbling up inside you. If tears wouldn't have filled your eyes, you would have seen how his gaze softned.

Jay had always confused you since the second you two met. He acted as if he hated you, yet sometimes he did things that made you question that. Normally you couldn't care less about his moodswings but right now you were just feeling so vulnerable, you didn't know if you could take it right now.

"Yes."

This was enought to let the tears stream down your face.

"You're such an asshole, you know?! I'm a human too! I can't beliebe I loved someone like you...", you breathed the last sentence rather to yourself than to him although he still caught what you said.

Your own words confused you. You loved him? It hurt, yet it also felt relieving to finally admit it, instead of living in denial.

"You what?!-"

"What did I ever do to you? Why do you keep confusing me and keep treating me like that?!", you yelled. You were so caught up with your feelings and thoughts, you didn't realise his astonished expression.

"Why do you hate me so much, Jay-"

"I don't. It's just that-"

You froze. What did he just say?

"W-What?"

"You heard me. I don't hate you. To be honest it's even quite the opposite..."

All the colour left your face.

"What are you saying? Is this a prank? You having a crush on me?"

"Not just a crush I would say...I-I didn't know what to do...I'm so sorry, Y/n for having you treated like this, it's just that I can't..."

You moved closer to him, your tears had stopped but your confusion just grew. Jay started chewing on his lower lip before he continued.

"You know Jake?"

You nodded.

"He told me he liked you..."

Silence.

"So?", you asked after few seconds of collecting your thoughts.

"He's my best friend! I can't just betray him and steal the girl he likes!", he explained,"He didn't know about my feelings for you though..."

Your mouth was slightly agape as you blankly stared at him. You were speechless.

"Jay, I don't even know Jake! In all these months, he hadn't made a single move towards me!", you started,"What do you feel? You can't just put his feelings over yours..."

"I love you, Y/n..."

Your heart stopped for a second. What did he just say?

"I really really do love you Y/n, but..."

"Jay, you're the one I love, not Jake...If he really was your best friend he would accept and support you feelings just like you did with him for all this time!"

He inched closer.

"I understand you, it's not an easy decision..."

"It really isn't", he admitted. His gaze was laying on you, it was soft and so full of emotions. You had never seen him look like that before.

"But Jay, you sometimes need to prioritize your own feelings-"

"You're right."

Then suddenly he moved forward and crashed his lips onto yours. Within seconds you were laying underneath him on his couch, feeling his soft lips move against yours as if you were made for eachother.

It felt amazing.

After all these months of having to suppress your feelings and having your crush treat you like shit, you finally had something that showed how the fight paied off.

Although it still wasn't okay what he did, you just didn't care enough to even think about that. Love is blind, as they say.

"I really tried to push you away, but it made my cravings even worse...I don't think I can hold back anymore~"

"Please, don't hold back~", you whispered.

Your hands found their way to the back of his head as you buried your hands in his hair to pull him in again.

This time the kiss was wilder, more passionate. You had never felt anything that could even compete with this feeling.

"You don't know how long i've been waiting for this~", he mumbled in your ear as he slipped his hand slowly under your shirt. His long lanky fingers left hot burning traces all over your skin, making it tingle.

His hand found his way to your breast where he softly started to massage it trough the thick fabric of your bra, while his other hand trapped you between it and the back of his couch.

"Ngh, Jay...", you whimpered. His touch made you feel butterflies in your stomach and you couldn't help but want more of it.

He sat down on you, his clothed dick directly over your cunt, before he got rid of his shirt. You inspected his body and let's just say...It was better than you could have ever imagined. The clothes he usually wore somehow managed to hide his lean yet prominent muscles so you had actually assumed he was rather the skinny type.

You let your hand wander over his soft skin, letting your fingers run over his sensitive nipple. As soon as you touched his bud, he breathed out sharply.

"Y/n, now it's your turn.", he said dominantly and before you could even think, he somehow grabbed your waist, pulling you up and sliding underneath you, so your positions were switched.

You were now sitting on his dick, feeling his errection through the fabric of his pants, his growing bulge.

You quickly got up and stripped, getting rid of your shirt and pants, leaving you in your black lace panties and nude bra only.

You were a bit embarassed if you were honest. If you had known how your visit would have ended, you would have worn a matching, prettier set of underwear, but as you tried to strip as arousing as you could, you noticed that Jay couldn't care less about you underwear. The way his eyes hungryly pierced into you, made you feel some type of way.

You had his attention– And only you.

You walked over to him and started to undo his belt.

"Mhh, ready?", you asked as you played with the hem of his underwear. He nodded eagerly and not even a minute later, you pulled down his remaining clothes, revealing his big dick.

You had never thought you would ever see one so beautiful. The tip was red, a vein pulsating on its side. You could only anticipate what it would feel like inside of you.

Carefully, you wrapped your hand around his lengh, which caused him to let out a sharp sigh.

After studying his furrowed expression, you started moving your hand up and down, sometimes even applying pressure to his tip with your thumb.

"Ngh, Y/n~ How are you so good at this?", he chuckled between his whimpers and moans, "Innocent much, huh?"

You grinned sheepishly. Even in this situation he couldn't stop teasing you. Maybe this was even one of the reasons you felt drawn to him, like a moth to a flame.

"Y-Y/n", he whispered. Only then, you saw the precum leaking out of his tip, the beads running down his lengh, making going up and down even smoother like lube.

"In the cupboard, second drawer.", he said and you immediately got it. You got up and quickly pulled out a condom. You unpacked it and put it over him.

You noticed, everytime you touched him or you felt him, your body tensed up. By now, your panties were soaking wet.

"What are you waiting for?~", he sat up, and pulled you onto his lap,"You prepared me so well, now it's your turn, babygirl..."

He softly laied you down on the couch, before he put his fingers in your mouth for you to wet them. Your tongue playfully moved around every single one of them and when he pulled them out, you could see threads of saliva.

Soon, you could feel him pushing one, then two fingers inside of you. You gasped.

Your hands automatically buried themselves in his silky dark hair, tugging a bit at it. He seemed to really enjoy it.

"Want me to make you feel good?"

You whimpered as a response, when he started moving his fingers.

"I want you...", you whined, only getting a chuckle from him.

"But you already have me, baby. I'm right here."

"N-No, I want you~"

"I see...Begging already? What happened to the feisty girl from before?", he teased. His free hand moved to you face and tucked a loose strand of your hair behind your ear.

"You look so beautiful, my pretty girl."

You couldn't help but blush at his comment.

"Time to give you what you deserve."

And with that, he pulled his fingers out, but instead placed his tip at your entrance, slowly rubbing it, before carefully pushing his cock inside.

Your hands went from his hair to his muscular back, scratching his skin from the overwhelming sensation.

At first it hurt, but because of his preparation and the sensitiveness in his touch, this pain soon turned into pure pleasure.

The feeling of him filling you out completely made you go insane and when he pulled out just to thrust into you again, you couldn't hold in your moans any longer.

"You sound so beautiful...", he complimented you,"Taking me so well, such a good girl."

You loved the way he talked to you. His raspy voice and pet names mixed with his moans of pleasure were like music in your ears.

After a while, he started picking up the pace, your lewd noises and the sound of your naked skin slapping onto each other filled the room. Your nails digged deep into his skin but he didn't even seem to care.

His hands were holding onto your hips, trying to reach deeper each time while hitting your sweet spot.

"Does it feel good? Mh?", he cooed. You nodded.

"Ngh, Jay~ I-I'm cu-cumming!", you screamed. The knot inside you tightened, until, within seconds, it released. Your climax felt amazing, him riding it out, the overstimulation driving you crazy.

Seconds later, just from seeing your slick spread all over his dick and hearing your forbidden noises, he came too.

Jay pulled out of you and threw his head back. Still trying to catch his breath. Then he bowed down and gave you on last passionat kiss before whispering:

"I love you, Y/n~"

[sadfruittheatre]

Loss and Lots of Retcons: The Current State of Affairs and Moving Forward

So, now that things have begun to calm down, I want to talk a little bit more about various retcons and what's going to change, both in terms of this blog and the timeline. This is also a to-do list for me, because I have hella ADHD and get very overwhelmed without some kind of game plan.

So, to get the big thing out of the way, several characters are no longer going to exist and will have never existed. You're going to see the things on this list and go "woah, wait a minute! aren't all these guys like, super important to a bunch of things!?" and the answer is yes, but sometimes things happen in real life that affect the plot and that is just a potential consequence of working in collaboration with other people.

So, the casualties are:

Mara

Flann

Veroa

Kuroza (Fish)

Anzu

Carma and Kone

It's a lot of characters unfortunately, but we still have plenty left.

Cayenne

Bragi

Aneas

Tomor

Eugene

Mirin

Coulie

Dulze

Deeji

Letch

Mille

Mento

The character pages will be updated accordingly.

There will also be some new characters introduced in conjunction to the plot things that have been happening in the background, but I will not be elaborating on all that yet until I iron out this other stuff. But know that I am definitely looking forward to introducing you to these guys and their lovely creators!

But Kateh, I hear you ask, how are you going to have concurrent plot things going on when you have to retcon like, everything??? Well, you see, I'm basically doing my best to keep the overall trajectories of my OCs as close to the same as possible in broad strokes, even if there are different characters involved or some things just didn't happen anymore. Some characters are honestly completely unaffected by this (like Aneas, who wins by staying in his lane and loving his wife). Other characters, namely Bragi, and to a lesser degree, Tomor, need a lot of work done to fix the damage.

As for the art and writing I've uploaded, much of it is probably going to be taken down, because I don't feel comfortable having art up of characters I no longer have the rights to use for a continuity that no longer exists. Some things can be edited in small ways, and if I can salvage it, I will; plenty of other things will stay up, though the context for them is largely going to have to be rewritten to fit the new continuity. I'm definitely bummed that so much of this entire project has to be gutted, but I'm hoping to be able to slowly rebuild things going forward. Honestly not sure if it would be easier to delete and start over, but I'll try to fix things as they are before I do all that.

I do actually have some establishing comics in the works to get us all adjusted to the new vibes, so we can at least look forward to that!

Now, let's talk plot and characters. We've talked a lot about what's lost, but here's what remains.

Now, while there are still a lot of minor details to work out, the broad strokes are as follows:

Bragi's still being sent to Conton City to atone for his stinky boy crimes. However, the big difference now is that for better immersion in the mortal culture, he's staying with a host family, the already overcrowded teacakes house with Dulze and Yamcha. Deeji is his new best friend. #DeejiSupremacy

He's still going to slowly get his shit together until he's forced to confront Aneas and they reconcile. Details are still hella fuzzy as to how that goes down but Aneas and Coulie (and Eugene) remain largely unchanged. Still happily married. #FlowerBudsSupremacy

A lot of the stuff with Mento probably still happened, though the context of Mirin's existence and what led up to Mento's death is gonna have to change wildly to accommodate it. Bragi's existential crisis will definitely have to be adjusted.

The Anzu shit? Didn't happen. Bragi likely remains unstabbed, unless we find another context to stab him in. With that in mind, he's probably going to revert back to his pre-vest design because like, the whole reason for that is because he got stabbed. At least his godtube channel remains alive and shitty. Coulie can still systematically dislike all of his videos.

At the most recent point in the timeline, Bragi's at least a little more willing to open up to people he trusts because Kuroza/Fish isn't there anymore to fuck it up for him by being weird about his trauma. He's still got some trust and vulnerability issues tho.

Tomor needs an overhaul at least in terms of his own trajectory. Part of this is due to the plot things I'm sitting on, part of it is because he lost his comedic foil in the form of Fish. He will definitely continue to cause problems on purpose tho, probably with New!Mento.

The Mento with Mirin goop in her brain is still very much a thing btw. She's so silly and I love her. #MentoSupremacy

Some of this stuff is still subject to change, and whatever does change likely won't be as detailed as it used to be, but we're doing what we can. It's a hot mess right now and it's gonna take a lot of time to fix it, so uh, thanks for bearing with me 👍

[averageclawcodeenjoyer]

Alright so as far as introductions go, I guess I should probably make one before I get too far into this.

HERES MY ABOUT ME POST!

My name's Leonardo, and you can call me any version of that that you want (Leo, Leon, Leonard, Nardo[my favorite], either way, it's all the same to me.) My pronouns are He/Him. I am an artist, author, animator, and a DEDICATED CLAWCODE ENTHUSIST (Hence the name)

I am also VERY autistic and don't get tone a lot, so tone tags are very important to me, especially when there's joking or sarcasm involved.

Ahem.

I know the Spiderverse Fandom isn't particularly alive (SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP) but I will try to post often, even if it's just a shitpost here and there. I really want to help feed into the ClawCode brain rot since the content for these two is SEVERELY FUCKING LACKING. So. If you have requests for things, I will probably end up doing them! My asks are always open, and I'd love to hear from anybody. I don't have any friends that love them the way that I do 😔😔

I have not had Tumblr before! Which is a little insane, so I'm new to all of this and learning how everything works. Please forgive me if I don't know the proper etiquette on this app lmao. My friend has been guiding me through all of this and told me to make an About Me post, so that's what I'm doing.

Here are some tags that will frequent my posts!

Yapping Hour - Will either be used for headcanons, or short stories/ideas/other ClawCode related crap. It's just going to be a general tag that will probably go on most of my posts from here on out.

Slur Gallery - Will be of the art I post of them, be it ship art or other :3 because everybody deserves a gallery of slurs to look at. AND JUST LOOK AT THEM!

Earworm - Is the tag I'll use when there's music involved, like songs that remind me of them (and the heavy analysis that goes with it **COMING SOON**), or animatics that I'm working on, or just anything that has to do with a song. Edits, artworks, the whole shebang.

Talkaholic - This will ALSO be used for mini stories/facfics, but more often than the yapping hour. So if you wanna read my writing of them that's what you can find it under.

Offline - will be under posts like these, where it isn't directly related to anything, just random blocks of text or other art that I feel like posting.

Oil And Water - THIS tag will be about the fanfic I am currently (excruciatingly slowly) writing! It doesn't have a happy ending and is meant to be a HEAVY angst story, like hurt/no comfort or very little comfort. I have one chapter out currently but will be working on more soon (and will make a separate post about it! But I will link it here as well. MOTIVATE ME TO WRITE IT /HJ)

Prowler Party - Is what I'll put on ALL of my posts as an extra way to help find me if one so desires d=(^o^)=b

OOC - On the chance that I might make something intentionally out of character, I will put this beneath it. I know a lot of people don't like mischaracterization, or incorrect portrayal of a character, but sometimes it's really fun to write, so I will be including that was well.

I think that's all that I can think of right now (I'm running off of an hour and 40 minutes sleep), but things may change or be edited in the future. But for now, I'll be signing off.

Shipwrecked - THIS WILL BE ABOUT MY SELKIE/SIREN AU BECAUSE IM ACTUALLY NOT OKAY ABOUT IT AND NEED TO SHARE MY INSANITY

HELLO AND THANK YOU TO THE WARM WELCOME I'VE RECIEVED!!

MORE COMIGN SOON

[trickybonmot]

I'm me so I will of course ask about "Interiority" for the WIP Ask Meme!

LOL haha you WISH this was something deep but actually it's just a dumb pun name for a fic I started where wangxian meet when LWJ is an architect and WWX is a carpenter working on fixing up an old building 🤷‍♀️ WWX will have a succession of coffee mugs with humorous slogans on them.

I'm reading it over now and I really like what I have. I think the problem is that I don't have a conflict in mind. I think I was going to have it be sort of driven by the project that they're doing but I didn't have concrete ideas about that. I'd like to get back to it at some point.

Small chunk of the beginning:

The heat of the morning settles over Lan Zhan like a suffocating blanket the moment he steps out of the car’s air conditioned bubble. Following his brother inside, he notes that there’s exterior work in progress, as indicated by the pop-up sunshade set up in the side yard, sheltering a table saw and an assortment of lumber and tools. A travel mug emblazoned “FUNCLE: the Fun Uncle” is sitting on the saw, but there’s nobody there.

Inside, they introduce themselves to Wen Qing, the director of the community center, and Wen Ning, her assistant and brother. Also in attendance is a small boy, perhaps four years old, who is dashing from room to room and exclaiming to himself, clearly involved in some game of his own while the grown-ups are talking. Wen Qing explains briefly what they’d like to do with the space, and then Lan Zhan goes to get started on taking measurements while Xichen discusses it with her in more depth.

The building itself is an old Victorian boarding house, once rather grand, now crumbling slowly to bits in what has become an economically depressed neighborhood. It’s a pity to see it going the way of so many fine old houses, riddled with the dismal alterations made by various owners over the years. All the interior trim, which would originally have been rich natural wood, is gummed over with an incredibly thick layer of drippy semi-gloss paint. The kitchen is a mess of cheap MDF cabinets and fluorescent lighting. The lyrical proportions of the once grand entry hall have been annihilated by someone building a wall to create a storage closet. Lan Zhan hopes this project can remedy at least some of those ills, although admittedly much of it is more of a carpentry and finishing issue than an architectural one.

When he steps out to photograph the exterior, there are work sounds coming from the sunshade, the clack of lumber and the intermittent whine of the saw. Also a voice — Jiang Wanyin’s carpenter is singing to himself. Singing and…rapping, and unselfconsciously beatboxing.

[bellybiologist]

Tallying up the Year

I hope you guys' december (which is almost over already, wtf) is going/has gone well! 2024 is upon us.

This christmas weekend, I mostly found myself thinking about how this year went, and honestly? despite all the things I haven't gotten to do, I still managed to accomplish quite a lot.

Me typing this rambly post out is less anything anyone needs to read, but more to remind myself of Things That Got Done™ than anything else because sometimes... I forget I do be getting shit done! And it's important we remind ourselves of the work we do.

The Things That got Done™

I advocated for my own Health. I scheduled (and went to!) so many doctor and dental appointments this year, holy shit. But, if the last few years have taught me anything, I simply have to put in the effort. I got my colon mostly sorted out, started a new regimen for my skin and hair (after chopping it off) so I'm feeling better, schedule an appointment with the optometrist in January, and even got lots of issues with my teeth fixed. Granted, our broken medical system made it incredibly stressful, and i spent thousands of dollars on the latter that I will be paying off til next july BUT!!!! This section is about the good things.

Started Streaming Again! I've been missing streaming since I stopped way back in I believe 2020. It was a fun way to interact with followers and supporters, so I'm glad I'm back to it on a regular schedule, with many of the old regulars still joining me while I work. Speaking of which:

I finished 43 total stream doodles. While I'm only filling a handful a month, it's definitely adding up! 40+ boys in the span of 5 months is nothing to scoff at, and that's not even considering that I'm doing this alongside normal patreon work.

I finished 39 total commissions this year. I'm definitely still going quite slowly, and I thank everyone who has been extraordinarily patient thus far, but I'm happy to say that my pace has been decent... at least relative to previous years. I got more done in the last 5 months than i did in the roughly year and a half period before 2023!

Replaced SEVERAL appliances that broke down. My computer moniter, my microwave, my refrigerator... all failed on my this year, and it took some work, but I finally managed to get them all replaced! So far, everything is working fine, but next on my agenda is to save up for a new desktop. This one I use for work has been at it since 2017, and it's about time to look into upgrading.

My Google Drive is Looking Nice. It's still not perfect, but I'm still immensely proud of how it's shaping up. There's still some curating of older pieces to do, but I've found a stride where I'm regularly updating it for people to peruse.

=====

Now despite these W's, I still got a long way to go. The things below could be considered resolutions for 2024, but that feels cursed to call them that. They are simply:

Things I Want to GET Done

Adding more YCH Figures. I was definitely expecting to have more to choose from by this point. And I really need to update some of the older ones too, because I think they've aged poorly. I got some neat suggestions and hopefully will find some time this week to showcase them in my discord to collect some feedback before releasing them.

Do more involved pieces/projects. I want to do more things like Comics, or simply pieces that I work on over the course of several sittings, ones where I can experiment and fiddle and practice!!! I rarely ever get to do that these days (I've only finished a few Big Personal Pieces this year), and I need to find time and energy to do them more because those are the things that truly make me feel like I grow as an artist. (and maybe I can find a shading style I actually fucking tolerate.). I also want to get more OC development and stuff done too, cuz I really didn't draw my children a whole lot this year!

Make more fucking Money!!!!! Let's not kid ourselves. I want to get to a point where I'm not just barely meeting the monthly quota. How to get there? I don't know, honestly. Things are so very stacked against artists right now, so it really does feel like the only thing that can be done is Not Give Up. Which I won't do. If/when I go down, I'm making it everyone else's problem. Trust. 😏

Save up to Visit the Boyfriend. I haven't seen him since January 2022! Big goal is to be comfortable enough to where I can fly my ass up there and smooch him. ����🏽

======

I won't lie, i'm going into 2024 quite anxious and still scraping by by the skin of my teeth (that I'm still paying for). It's going to be a BIG year cuz oh boy, it's election year, there's plenty of family developments i gotta keep an eye on and work to be a part of... not to mention all the horrible stuff going on still (free palestine!).

Here's hoping shit goes our way this coming year! And let's get ,more strikes going so everyone is getting their fucking money!!! :V

[bengiyo]

Step By Step Ep 6 Stray Thoughts

Last week, fans created a stir because they read a scene a certain way, and Dee Hup House decided to edit the scene in question. I am not happy about this. Otherwise, Pat is leading his first big project involving creating an ad for a client. Jeng has been hovering at a distance, and many lines are being crossed with them. Jaab and Jen also crossed a line and kissed. Put has thrown down the gauntlet with Jeng, making his intentions towards Pat clear. Ae is pregnant, and this apparently something Beam feels a lot about?? Still, Pat and Jeng had something almost like a date to see the fireworks.

Dick is abundant and low in value, and I'm glad Pat is getting other guys sliding into his DMs.

I'm glad Chot is out of the hospital. Also, Jeng needs to stop looking at Pat so fondly at work.

Jeng was so worried if Pat would like his food, only to learn that Pat hates celery.

Jeng is such an older sibling. He blew on the nugget before trying to force it down his brother's throat.

Excited about Pat and Chot collaborating more, especially if it leads to more scenes of two queer people teasing each other before a date.

So Jeng spent time working on a Pat-friendly recipe, and Pat got all gussied up for a date only to get stood up. The gays are not thriving. At least Chot looks great and is engaged.

Jeng suggesting Pat help him with a coupon was smooth. Now I want some sushi though.

And look at that. These two can have a normal set of interactions without Pat completely losing it. I like that Jeng talked about the aversion to celery in a way that didn't make Pat feel bad about himself.

Put is going to use every opportunity to try to reinforce familiarity with Pat, and Pat looks so uncomfortable about it.

If this classmate is any indication, Pat likes them big (and he is valid for that).

OMG this is horrible. Pat's date has turned into an MLM pitch. That's right, Pat. Get the hell out of there!

Oh good. Pat realized what it was. Unfortunately, Put helped, and is all about taking every opportunity.

Where's the gif of Shin being mad at Minato for being easily tricked by food? Don't let him get you, Pat!

Damn, Jeng looked so sad about Pat balking at the shopping date offer.

Oh to be Pat, with three hot guys with baggage pursuing you at once.

This man is really hard selling in Pat's workplace.

Jaab's mom said, "I'm too pretty to be heartbroken," and I respect her for that.

I'm sure the color folks will have something to say about Pat choosing a red jacket and Jeng wearing a blue shirt.

Oh hey we actually went on the furniture date!

"I feel things slowly." Bitch, me too! The fuck!

I know these two aren't going to act like they didn't have a whole moment just now!

Yes, make the big man carry the new chair into the house. Make him sweat.

Yes! Let's turn the Ikea date into a cooking date!

Pat thrives on praise. He shines any time Jeng tells him he did a good job at something.

Pat, if you don't want to be with Put anymore, maybe not show that much chest on a date.

Demanding Put now disappear is giving me Our Dating Sim flashbacks.

There's something to be said about Pat knowing he was gay for a long time, and Put learning this about himself later. Couple that with Put's ambition to escape poverty, and I do feel for him. Pat is totally right to be cautious with him, though.

Wtf is Kong doing outside the restaurant? Was he stalking him like that?? Gross.

Why does Jeng hold his hands on the steering wheel like that? Both of his hands are at 12 o' clock.

Damn, Pat. You on one date thinking about the guy from another date telling you how to get rid of a guy from a third date.

Pat, are we really giving it up for a plushie?

Oh boy. Big work problems next week.

I really like that Pat has romantic options in this show! I also like that we have a gay man setting a boundary with a pushy man. Curious how things eventually settle with Put.

[shuttershocky]

There's a strange "privilege" I think about sometimes: getting to be a hater.

I cannot stress enough how much being a creative for a living, not just making things but needing to make things to eat, blunts your ability to hate on the internet.

If you showed me now to the me of ten years ago, the past me would find the current me unrecognizable. I was picky as hell with what I liked and notoriously difficult to please, and because I liked to write a lot, I learned how to state my vitriol in words and say exactly why and how I thought something was shit.

I got good enough at it that I got paid to write reviews about video games while in college, and while I attempted to make my criticism more constructive and state my opinions as opinions rather than fact, I wasn't about to go lowering my standards just because someone was an indie working on their first game.

At the same time though, I ended up writing FOR local projects, and that's when it really landed with me that this shit is fucking hard.

Making anything at all involves baring a piece of your soul to the world, but all I had ever made before were short stories that made no sense and would get laughed out of literature club and embarrassing video game fanfiction I was too ashamed to upload to my account on fanfiction.net. I hadn't made things that people were actually supposed to read and play before, and seeing people at cons reading my words on a screen (on a project that sadly went unreleased due to other reasons) was an excruciatingly humbling experience no writing tips or advice ever really prepared me for.

I felt the effect almost immediately. Lots of little annoyances in a game I'd play or in a movie I'd see that I would have given it shit for in the past would just... Get accepted. Some mistakes or even whole creative choices that used to be dealbreakers for me were just regular old minuses. Things I would have found merely passable before became likable in my eyes. I started to find the roughness charming, imagining what sort of bullshit must the creators have gone through to even release this thing at all.

The thing is, I don't think my critical eye has weakened at all. I can still pick out and name parts of a work I would have torn to shreds when I was a teenager. I can still go ham on something I find particularly egregious if I really want to. I just... Don't really want to nowadays. Not anymore.

I don't have the energy for it. I think about what it must have been like to work on something and my tone immediately dials it back several notches because I was once hired to write for a game while in a very dark period of my life and that memory haunts me still.

Now when I don't like something half the time I just don't mention it. When I like something even a little I talk up what I find so enjoyable in it, and I don't even LIKE being positive and restrained, it's just what comes easier to me now. I kinda miss being a hater, but I'm slowly coming to accept that those days are done.

This is just something I think about every once in a while, because now and then someone still remembers how I used to be and assumes I've still got these impossibly high standards. I've had a friend tell me "So and so said that if [Shutters] likes it, it must mean it's really good", and I kind of just have to give a half-hearted "Oh well you know it's got its flaws, I just had a lot of fun" because people regarding my approval as some kind of seal of quality feels sinfully good for my ego, but I don't like getting people to expect a masterpiece off of something that only promises a fun ride. That wouldn't be fair to both them and the work.

I guess I'm still adjusting to my changing standards. There is one nice side effect though: it's a lot easier to enjoy your guilty pleasures when they become just pleasures instead.