#I've been thinking of changing my whole tagging system so like. it will show in the main tags

[doppoorochisimp]

One of the greatest things Doppo ever did was rip off the ribs from some random child murderer he decided to stalk because he's a freak like that

And one of the worst things he did was drop the f slur but it's ok he can reclaim it

[vegaseatsass]

Reality tv is so fucking dangerous for me because my brain still whirs as if I'm watching fictional characters but I'm NOT and I should NOT be blorbofying or armchair diagnosing these irl human beings, it's simply safer for me to never ever engage. Tl;dr my god the exes on His Man 3 have eaten my mind, I can't stop thinking about them. I won't share REAL PERSON HEADCANONS (basically: who pings as neuroatypical) but I went from thinking Myeongkyun was the most hilarious entertaining television figure I'd seen in years to being really truly gutted for him and his like, slow struggling emotional processing which makes him sooooo frustratingly opaque even though he is trying, and his fuckboy affect which is so deceptive for how confusingly deeply (but just. sloooooowly) he actually feels. Youngjoon has been my favorite contestant this entire time (well, Youngjoon and Seungjin but let's not get me started on how it feels to watch Seungjin go untreasured episode after episode) and Hanmin jumped way up there in episodes 7 and 8 too because who knew he was the absolute kindest and most supportive and emotionally intelligent person in that entire house, I'm rooting SO HARD for him and Youngjoon I think they're such a crazy good match for each other augh. So the thing I find so compelling about Myeongkyun and Youngjoon's conflict is that it's really easy for me to understand where both of them were coming from; as absolutely maddening as it is to imagine being in Youngjoon's shoes and trying with so much hyperverbal self-awareness to reach some kind of clarity and just being hit in the face again and again with Myeongkyun's blase opaqueness, I really DO think they were both trying super hard and in good faith in that exhausting conversation! It understandably didn't FEEL that way to Youngjoon, as Myeongkyun led him in circle after circle, but I'm seriously like unhinged with how much I feel for Myeongkyun rn and his visible overwhelm. When Youngjoon was about to leave and tell Myeongkyun to figure things out on his own and Myeongkyun told him it's actually easier for him !!! to sort through his feelings with him there !!!! that's such an admittance, he absolutely was trying that whole time but what comes out of his mouth is sooooooooo not intelligible and thus as infuriating as humanly possible for Youngjoon, this incredibly verbal, emotionally analytic overthinker. They're such a bad match lmao and it's so so sad that Myeongkyun just assumed their relationship was moving as slowly as his feelings do and not that he was fully ghosted dklfjslkdfja I can just see BOTH THEIR SIDES I'm almost always on the side of the person who is like "how was I supposed to know what you ghosting me meant? I kept contacting you because I just thought you were busy!" vs. the ghoster who is all ugh dude why couldn't you read the room? but if Myeongkyun has always been like this - answering a direct question with "Maybe I'm ENTJ!" or "I don't want to tell you" or munch munch munching and "mmm"-ing and blinking and never ever answering what he was actually asked - it's pretty easy to understand why Youngjoon would assume this is a guy who neither cares about nor requires direct communication of any kind.

Lol sorry I've never posted into this tag before and this is a super incoherent blur of feelings before I go offline for the next two days but I just have to get it out of my system because I don't think I've ever had a reality show change my perception of somebody as much as Myeongkyun just like. Visibly hanging on by a thread while saying all the absolute wrong things in his stupid cool guy voice. and then breaking down as soon as he was alone. did. "Dating Minseon is... a possibility" went from sounding like a half-assed non-commitment to me, to Myeongkyun very seriously working through his feelings at his regular slow slow speed, and I'm fully rooting for them as well atp.

I wish this season had more friendship and less shady secret missions because everyone is so miserable... including me, who is sitting here typing nonsense instead of posting about my safely fictional characters.

[bonesandthebees]

Hi again Bee.

Thank you for lending an ear to listen even if I just kinda showed up. I really appreciate it. I've actually been reading through some of your other stories and they're very good (I adore the fae works!).

When it comes to Wilbur, I'm just. Very disappointed and upset. Of course I support Shubble and am glad she spoke out, it's very important and I'm glad that it's encouraged others to come forward with their own stories of abuse at the hands of large creators. At the same time though part of me wishes she hadn't said anything, so I could have continued as I was, in blissful ignorance, even if I feel really guilty for thinking like that.

It just saddens me that someone I looked up to so much ended up being this horrible person. It makes me worried that I too am bad, that somehow he has imprinted his awfulness unto me. I used to be horrible too. I like to think I've grown as a person, I was only a kid, but have I? Or was being drawn to Wilbur a sign? Like attracting like?

Y'know, I used to say that my hair style goals were how Wilbur's hair is, and recently I got a haircut. When I took a shower earlier it ended up floofing up in a similar way to his. I don't know how to feel about that. Maybe I should style it differently, even though I like the floof. I don't want to be even a little reminiscent of an abuser.

I am reminiscent of him though, in ways I can't change. I used to feel so seen by him, we're both song writers, and hypochondriacs, and I wanted to be him so badly I would cry. I would cry because he was everything I desperately craved to be as an insecure transmasc, an attractive guy with a beautiful voice and an amazing life. And now he's horrible, and probably always has been, and all of my memories of him are tainted.

I hate that I can't listen to Lovejoy anymore. It feels unfair to the other band members. It isn't their fault Wilbur is awful, and yet I'm taking away a source of their income. I know I'm taking away from Wilbur too, but he's only one person out of the group. Maybe that's just me giving an excuse so that I won't have to stop enjoying their music. It doesn't matter, I can't stomach listening to them anymore anyways.

I keep getting songs from YCGMA stuck in my head. It's like now that I can't listen to it anymore my brain has decided to fuck with me by making me listen to it anyways. I can't even justify listening to that album, that's just Wilbur's music. I was going to cover a song from that album for fun. Now I can't.

Is it bad I still find comfort in Wilbur as a character? C!Tommy is my favorite, but C!Wilbur is almost always a huge part of any C!Tommy story and I love C!Wilbur stories too. I know C! ≠ CC! but I just. It's complicated.

Idek why I'm this upset. I haven't been an avid watcher of anyone in the DSMP in at least over a year. If anything this whole thing has brought me back into the fandom more than I have been in ages. I feel bad about that, but also this situation has introduced me to people like Aimsey, whose content I'm seeing more of and I find myself enjoying.

I've also found more great DSMP fics lately in my quest to binge read them before the mass deletions start. Is it bad to find good things in a bad situation?

I'm sorry for the lack of put togetherness and the length of this ask. I promise I'm usually more coherent and to the point.

-Tech (just call me Tech like a name, "tech anon" feels weird heh)

hey tech, sorry for a bit of a late reply I've been busy the past few days

(sorry about the 'tech anon' thing, it's just a habit since that's how I refer to most of my anons. I'm going to still tag your ask as tech anon though just for my tagging system if that's okay)

I'm so glad you like the fae stories!! I'm still so proud of both of those looking back on them

anyway, yeah, I get that. I get the guilty wish that none of this had ever come out so you could just continue to go on in blissful ignorance. when someone learns something very upsetting, it's only natural to feel like you wish you never learned that. you don't need to feel guilty for that. you're not a bad person for your emotional reactions to things. your actions are what matters.

also, you are in no way a bad person because you were drawn to wilbur's content. the persona wilbur put on for the internet was not representative of who he actually was. you were drawn to the facade. an illusion of the person wilbur could've been, if he actually practiced the things he preached. you said you used to be a bad person, but you've changed. the fact that you are worried at all that you might still be bad shows a level of self-awareness and concern that wilbur apparently did not have. because wilbur was aware he was a bad person and treated the people around him terribly, but he didn't care to try and be better. as long as you're trying to be better, you're already leagues ahead of him.

also, regarding the hair, the floofy fringe is an incredibly common haircut. that is not exclusive to wilbur soot. you do not look like him if your hair does the floof similarly to his, it just makes you look like thousands of other dudes with fluffy fringe.

the day after shelby first streamed I had an MSR song stuck in my head and I hated it so much. it really sucks. you just have to try and drown it out with other music

it's not hypocritical at all to still find comfort in c!wilbur. I know it's complicated, and there's so much discussion I could get into as to why it's so complicated, but we can all separate the guy and the character in our heads. there's no reason to feel guilty about that. and there's also nothing bad about finding good in this situation. I think it's really sweet that you've found so many great fics in this time and I'm so glad you've been getting comfort from them. you're appreciating the authors hard work and that's a good thing! you don't need to feel bad about that

I hope you're doing okay tech

[heliza24]

Wilhelm and Sara as A Plot and B Plot Protagonists

This meta was originally a part of two-part answer to an ask box question, but since I've seen the idea of Sara and Wilhelm as parallel characters catching on recently, I decided to repost it as it's own meta for easier reference. This is one aspect of my personal Young Royals interpretations I'm most passionate about, so it's been great to see people start to talk about Sara and Wilhelm this way, and I look forward to future discussion. Ok, here we go:

Let’s talk about story structure for a minute, specifically TV story structure. Most TV has an A plot and a B plot (and sometimes a C plot too). In old school cable procedurals, the A plot would be the mystery of the week, while the B plot would be about whatever was happening in the characters’ personal lives. If there was an overarching mystery or storyline that tied the whole season together, that would be the C plot. As you can guess by how they’re named, the A Plot would take up the most time and do the most to drive  the episode forward. The B plot is next most important, etc. Once shows started to become more serialized in the age of streaming, the concept of A and B plots changed a little bit. Now the plots are divided by character and theme. The A plot will be headlined by the protagonist and will explore the main themes of the show. The B plot will be headlined by a secondary protagonist, who doesn’t have as much to do as the A plot lead, but is still answering a dramatic question that relates to the central themes of the show. A lot of times the primary and secondary protagonists’ actions influence each other, but they don’t share a ton of screen time. (If they did, their stories wouldn’t be separate.) You can think of the A and B plot protagonists as two sides of the same coin. They’re intricately connected, they’re exploring the same ideas, but they rarely come face to face, and they often represent different perspectives on the same themes. Black Sails is probably my favorite example of this. (I’m not as active in the Black Sails fandom as I am in the Young Royals fandom, but Black Sails is probably my all time favorite show and I absolutely love all the ungovernable pirates over in the Black Sails tag. Shout out to them). James Flint is the main protagonist and headliner of the A story, but Max is the secondary protagonist that headlines the B story. Both are struggling with the question of how to achieve and wield power in an unjust world, and their political maneuvers consistently influence each other’s plots. They share a lot of secondary characters across both of their plots, but they themselves never interact. So that’s one example, and if you look around at your favorite shows you’ll be able to find lots that adhere to this formula, including, I would say, Young Royals.

I think a lot of people are kind of subconsciously looking for this kind of structure, and have decided that Simon is the protagonist of the B plot. I understand this, because we all love Simon. He’s really well written and acted, his personality is so compelling, and his chemistry with Wilhelm is great. I spend a lot of time writing him in fic (I’m the writer of all the Simon content in Heart and Homeland) so I understand this impulse. But if you were looking for Simon to be anchoring the B plot in season 2, you might have been disappointed. Because in reality I don’t think he’s the secondary protagonist. I think Sara is. 

Sara is set up as a foil to Wilhelm, the main protagonist, in so many ways. I always say that the driving dramatic question of Young Royals lives with Wilhelm, and it’s something along the lines of “should I conform and live the oppressive life that was designed for me, or rebel and find my own path to happiness?” Sara is wrestling with a similar question that’s kind of the inverse of this; for her settling into a prescribed role in the Hillerska class system initially seems like a relief. So maybe for her the dramatic question is something along the lines of “is the price of fitting in worth it? Will it lead to true happiness?” They feel so much like opposite sides of the same coin to me. 

So Sara and Wilhelm are both trying to define themselves in relation to their families and also the class system. This comes up in the similarities of their family structure (they both feel very connected to their class position through their families; they both have complicated relationships with their mothers and bad to negligible relationships with their fathers; they both have a deep connection to their siblings) and in the relationships they choose to embark upon. They’re both navigating a very serious and complicated first love. They’re both dating across class (in the opposite direction, a perfect example of the “different views on the same theme” aspect of primary and secondary protagonists). They both have concerns about how and when their relationships become public, and by extension are both playing in the sandbox of themes around privacy and authenticity that defines so much of the show.  

Both have difficulty regulating and recognizing their emotions. Sara seems to exhibit alexithymia, a common aspect of autism that makes it hard to recognize one's own emotions. Wilhelm has been taught to repress his emotions, which he does well until he explodes (like when he got into the fight at the top of the series or when he yells at his mom on the phone). He’s also managing a lot of physical symptoms of anxiety. 

Both also struggle with questions of justice and how to make things right. In the beginning of season 2, Wilhelm is initially determined to destroy August because he thinks August will never repent, but by the end of the season he’s starting to realize that this was the wrong technique. He realizes this largely because of Simon; he only puts down the gun and walks away from August because Simon does first.  Sara makes the opposite journey: she starts by trusting that August will change and repent on his own, but then she is forced to confront the fact that this is not true, and that she needs to use the legal system to bring August to justice. She also makes this realization largely because of Simon, and seeing the ways that she has hurt Simon, in the same scene with the gun. 

The other big argument in support of Sara as the secondary protagonist of the show is that she and Wilhelm never directly interact. Their actions affect each other all the time, but they don’t share a scene together. They’re living on parallel but separate story tracks. 

Simon is a crucial character in both Wilhelm and Sara’s stories, but the fact that he is close with both excludes him from being a protagonist of his own plot line. (I would say the same about August, who is a sort of antagonist for both Wilhelm and Sara, and Felice, who is a friend and confidant to both.) That doesn’t mean that Simon isn’t well written. He has a very compelling character arc, motivates much of the plot, and his relationship with Wilhelm forms the heart of the show. But I think the reason people were disappointed in his story in season 2 is that they were expecting something from him that the structure of the show doesn’t support.  

If you’re interested in reading more about A/B/C plot structures I found this website really easy to understand. Also shout out to @bluedalahorse for talking to me about Wilhelm and Sara and helping me articulate what I was trying to say here.

[renton6echo]

Day 1 of 30 Days of The Bad Batch

Season 1, Episode 1: Aftermath

Alright. Let's dive into, probably, my favorite episode of the series so far. It's just such a great opening to the characters and the story. What a way to open a series right at Order 66. I just knew we were in for such a rollercoaster from the start of this show. Really, Order 66? That's where you're starting off the show? Force, have mercy on us all.

The biggest gem of this episode is that it's the only one we get where we get to see Hunter, Echo, Tech, Wrecker, and Crosshair just be a squad together. If I had my wish, I would have liked to have seen more of that before Crosshair and the rest of the batch split off. It was harder to see what the loss of Crosshair did to the team on an emotional and military tactics level. We didn't get much in the way of their team dynamic apart from Crosshair just being known as the surly, grumpy one. While I do love all the theories around how it was likely Echo who stepped into the role that Crosshair had like like being the peacekeeper between Tech and Wrecker's, it would have been nice to see more of that so we had an idea of what the Batch lost.

I've put my live musings of the episode under this thread for the sake of my followers. Sorry, not sorry!! Ya'll knew what you were getting into following me 👀

Not sure if anyone else is interested in doing this but if you're also re-watching TBB before the season 3 premiere be sure to tag all your musings in the #30 Days of The Bad Batch so I can read them!!

@floundrickthewayfarer @saturn-sends-hugs @the-bi-space-ace

First off, Captain Grey, I wish we had gotten to know you more before your chip activated because you seem like a sassy and salty man. I'm sure you and Rex swapped lots of stories.

Wee Kanan. I remember watching this the first time and having just finished Rebels. I saw and heard Kanan and literally said, "Oh, shit. Please no!! This is so mean." Good times. Good times.

So at what point did they realize they could use Echo's scomp as a melee weapon? It is so badass.

Oooff. That shot of the large canyon separating Kanan and Hunter that symbolizes the break between clone and Jedi *chefs kiss*

I really wish we had more scenes take place in TBB's barracks. So many fun details to dissect.

Will never get over Tech's matter-the-fact "My exceptional mind." Legend.

LOL. Echo's put-out expression when Wrecker notes how ugly Palpatine is! I've never noticed that.

Wonder how well the clones are informed in intergalactic politics. Echo seems to have a real knowledge of the larger political nuance more than the others. He is the first to openly question clones as soldiers of the Empire versus the Republic. I assume the Kaminoans would not have spent a lot of time educating clones on political structures and more on just being compliant with the system they were born into. For most clones, the transition from republic to empire is more or less just a name change, but Echo clearly takes issue with the implications.

Battle simulation time! Honestly, I could watch a whole series of clones just bantering and comming each other in battle. Such a fun, creative way to learn about characters and see them interact with each other. Wrecker and Tech sniping at each other is the best thing ever.

ALSO, Hunter why you whistling at them? You got comms for a reason you dramatic punk.

The implication that Crosshair also cried after seeing a fully stocked armory is just...I need that footage.

I never noticed that most, if all the weapons the Onderon insurgents have are Republic-issued.

Omega liking the batch's smelly barracks? Yeah, she's one of them.

Freaking Tarkin. I'm assuming he was just going to fry all their brains to make the whole batch compliant. Ugh. Poor Crosshair.

Oh, Shock troopers. Worst jobs with the worst rap. Do you think we will get to see Commander Fox in the last season? 🤞🏽

"You were down!" Echo has the best sense of humor.

[formicarum-rex]

ive been on cohost on-and-off since november, and i think im going to stick with it (famous last words, i know, but i am genuinely enjoying my time there, meeting some nice people and enjoying the posts that come across my dash)

home page

my blog

general observations, differences between here and tumblr (both good and bad), and caveats under the cut

the ability to use html and css in posts is fantastic, and while i do sometimes miss being able to change the formatting with a simple highlight like on tumblr, the added abilities to customize more than makes up for that. i've only used it a bit myself, but plan to use it more going forward, and you can get some fantastic shitposts on your dash because of this. note that only posts are hyper-customizable. blogs themselves aren't as customizable as on tumblr (think the default/mobile theme here)

i think their pro-privacy, anti-algorithm, anti-numbers philosophy is admirable. it's not perfect-- funding is a continual trouble, although they have plans for making it sustainable.

as with all smaller websites, it is a bit of an echo-chamber and has its share of drama and controversy.

the fewer number of people also lead to there being fewer good posts than on here, especially if you have niche interests, but my dash is still quite active, and i have to check it at least once a day to keep up-to-date.

if you edit your original post, all reblogged versions of the post are updated as well.

it has a comprehensive cw system built into posts, more reminiscent of mastodon than tumblr. there is discourse about its use or over-use, but on the whole i think this is a big improvement.

i (thankfully) haven't run into anybody or any post that required blocking or silencing or muting yet, but the options are there and thorough.

related, there is a no-nonsense attitude towards bigotry. i havent run into any bad eggs myself, but from what i've been given to understand they are sniped more or less as soon as they're discovered. there may be moderation issues as the website expands (this is one issue where places split up into smaller groups like mastodon have benefits) but as of right now, it seems to be working just fine, and better than tumblr.

there's no general within-post search for the sake of privacy and to limit harassment opportunities, but unlike tumblr, the tag search is functional. in addition, all posts with tags you've bookmarked show up in a separate, single tab on your dash, in proper chronological, non-algo'd order, which is a good way to discover new people to follow and posts to reblog. this is similar to "your tags" on tumblr, but unlike tumblr, i trust it to work

i haven't used this yet, but sideblogs are able to comment, ask, like, follow, etc, separately. no more "follows from [main url]"

in general, i like the vibes better than pillowfort, the other tumblr replacement site, and its a much more satisfying tumblr replacement than mastodon, because, well, its not like twitter (although i do like mastodon for other reasons).

there are some odd things that differentiate it from tumblr that you have to get used to at best, and can be extremely frustrating at worst:

notes cant be viewed per-post. they're all under your notification tab, chronologically listed. this hasnt been a problem for me, but i understand that this can get messy if you have a lot of followers/notes

if you are not OP, you cannot view others' reblogs. i've found that this is mostly fine, but it does mean you cant dive into the notes to see if anyone has added anything you'd like to reblog instead of the version on your dash. changing this is one of the most requested features. it doesn't seem to conflict with the site's anti-numbers ideals as long as it only lists contentful reblogs (those with additions), so i'm hopeful it will be added.

OP is not notified of tags on reblogs. all comments that are towards OP and not towards your followers belong in the comments. unlike other things in this list, this isn't a downside so much as a neutral difference that has taken me a long time to get used to.

the comments are generally important. reblog chains are still used, but comments (replies) are more functional than they are on tumblr, with proper ability to reply in comment threads and a better UI. they are used more often on cohost than on here, especially if you want to start a convo with OP and others viewing the post. as far as i can tell, everyone can see every comment, unlike the reblogs.

photoset layouts are not as flexible as on tumblr

no DMs

discovery hasn't been a big issue for me as someone who is primarily a reader/viewer (if anything, the functional tagging system and unified bookmarked tags tab makes it easier), but ive heard that for creators it can be frustrating

i am under the impression that pillowfort is the place to go for specifically fandom posting. more fandom people have been joining cohost though, especially since a bunch of tumblr people joined a couple weeks ago.

i realize this isn't exactly a hard sell, but want people to be aware of potential downsides before creating an account. despite these things, i really do urge you to check it out if youre interested! it's a good place :)

[hadesgoddess]

Ok so... This is kind of hard to do, but it's been something I've been thinking a lot about of the past few months, maybe even since last year.

I'm taking a break from the self-ship community. I have no problem talking about why and it's not because of anything or anyone specific. I joined this community 4 years ago in 2019 and since then I've met a lot of amazing people that I'm so lucky to call friends now, even people I've gotten to meet offline. Some of these are people I'll be friends with my whole life, I can tell.

It's also given me a space to experiment with who I want to be. I found confidence in myself that I thought I'd lost when I grew up, confidence to show it off to the world and a lot of people in my life have commented on it. I think if I'd come to realize how I experience romance without being a part of this community first, it would have been a lot harder to come to terms with; maybe I never would have and I would have been questioning myself and lonely for 25 more years. Instead, I get to make my world however I want to and no one can take it away.

And while I'm thankful for all of that, I've seen a serious decline in the community. Of course, I know if I stick around, I can change that even in a small way. But the truth is, I'm very tired. I'm very tired of in-fighting and of constantly trying to be on guard against everyone new or even people I have been following for a while. People aren't listening to each other and lots of fingers are being pointed every which way. There's people in this community who are drowning, trying to enjoy it, but their posts about asking for better tagging systems and more healthy boundaries and respect are being swallowed up. On top of that, I'm going back to school and while I love making new art and fics, I don't have the energy or time to dedicate to this community like it needs.

I may come back, I may not, feeling a lot like a monarch butterfly flying south, it's a mystery as to where I'll end up. My 1 year anniversary with Hades is coming up so I'll likely stick around till then, but after that, it's an extended hiatus for me.

Y'all stay safe now, ya hear?

[spaghettificationandpretzels]

I’d love to see Chibs or happy with the first time as a couple prompt please. I love them both and I know you’ll do them justice, thanks in advance I can’t wait to read it 🥹🥹

Masterlist

Dinner and a Dance

Contains: Fluff, smut, (oral sex M receiving, fingering, P in V)

1.3K words

Comment if you want to be tagged/removed or follow #Sp's fluffiest Smutfest

You and Chibs enjoy a nice night.

"Please, come in." You opened the door and invited Chibs inside with a smile and he pressed a kiss to your cheek before walking in and kicking off his shoes.

"You cooking me dinner Lass?"

You nodded, "yep, dumplings with pork and shrimp, a veggie stirfry and steamed egg custard."

He smiled, "ooo, Japanese" He wrapped his arms around you and looked into your eyes, "I am one lucky man."

You sighed, "I watched a travel show yesterday and got some inspiration."

"Well it all smells amazing." He looked you up and down, "I love your dress."

You pecked him, "thank you. How about you have a seat, it will be ready soon."

****

"How was work?"

Chibs was enjoying the food just as much as the conversation, "good, we're trying a new filing system which has been fun, Gemma and Chucky almost started a riot."

You laughed, "I can imagine, how's the food?"

Chibs moaned, "great, I should get you to cook for me all the time."

You smiled, "I'm glad, I'll go get the custard." You headed to the kitchen and returned a few moments with your hands full, "tell me what you think, I've never made this before."

Chibs dug his spoon in and took almost half down in one go, groaning in enjoyment as he enjoyed the taste, "this is my new favourite thing, what do you have planned next?"

You smiled, "some Jazz and a dance?"

Chibs returned your smile, "I'd love that." You finished the custard then Chibs helped you take the dishes to the sink, "let me help you?"

You nodded and handed him the sponge, "well, since I did all the cooking you can wash up and I'll clean the table."

Chibs came in from the kitchen just as you turned the music on, the soft Jazz filling the room as you held your hand out for him to take. Chibs pulled you into his arms as he moved his feet to the music, "I had a lot of fun tonight."

Chibs smiled, "so did I, we definitely need a repeat, maybe I can cook for you this time?"

He lifted his hand to stroke your cheek, "I'd like that, what do you have in mind?"

He thought for a moment, "steak, potatoes and salad. You did a pretty impressive job and if I mess up something fancy it's going to bruise my ego."

You giggled, "that's alright, I like steak." As the song wound down the air changed and you looked towards the bedroom, "you wanna go and watch some TV? The one in my bedroom is pretty good."

You reached your hand out and Chibs took it, lifting it to his lips and kissing the back of your palm, "whatever you want Lass."

You walked him to the bedroom and stood him in the middle of the room, "do you still want to watch TV?"

You shook your head, "no, not really. I'd like to do something else if you want that too?"

Chibs smiled softly and leaned in to kiss you, "I'd like that."

You ran your hands down his chest, the fabric of his shirt soft under your skin and looked up at him, "can I suck you dick?"

Chibs swallowed, "I told you, whatever you want y/n." You smiled and kissed him again, moving your lips from his, over his cheek then down his neck, and unbuttoned his shirt as you made your way down his body. He shrugged it off his shoulders and you sunk to your knees, Chibs watching you with lust in his eyes the whole way down.

You flicked open his SAMCRO belt and slid it out of the loops then moved to the fly of his jeans. Chibs' hand found your face as you pulled his pants down, his cock hard against the fabric of his boxers as you kissed the skin above the hem.

You looked up at him with a smile and he nodded so you gripped the edges of his underwear and pulled them down, your hand finding his cock as you stroked it to full hardness. Chibs sighed as you licked him from base to tip, his thumb rubbing your cheek as you sunk down further on his cock.

You wrapped your hand around what your mouth couldn't reach and focused on extracting every grunt and groan you could, Chibs' hips beginning to rock as you picked up the speed. You took your free hand and cupped his balls.

Far too soon, Chibs tapped your cheek and you pulled back, "yes?"

Chibs smiled, "it's your turn, we have plenty of time for more later."

His lips met yours as he spun and walked backwards to the bed, sitting down and taking you with him. You climbed into his lap and he took your face in his hands, kissing you until you were breathless. You pulled away from him and looked into his eyes, "I want more." He reached behind you and unzipped your dress, pulled it down and racked his eyes over your skin.

He smiled, "me too." You climbed off his lap and onto the bed, bringing Chibs with you as his fingertips grazed over your chest, "can I?" You nodded and reached behind you, undoing your bra for him and sliding the straps off your shoulders before placing your hands on his bare chest, "you are so beautiful."

He pressed his lips to yours as you both lay down on your sides, Chibs removing your panties before lifting your leg over his hip and running his hand up and down your thigh. He moved his hand to your hip and you smiled, "tell me if I do something you don't like?"

You nodded, "yep."

He moved his hand to your centre, his fingers running through your slit, "you're so wet for me, have you been enjoying yourself?"

You kissed his neck, "I have." His thumb found your clit and he slid one then two fingers inside you, finding your G-spot with ease as you moaned.

"There are certain benefits to being around the block love."

You giggled and stroked his face, "more than one, you are very handsome."

He smiled and kissed it, it was soft and gentle, his lips barely brushing yours. He scissored his fingers open and his thumb sped up, working you up as he deepened the kiss. His fingers picked up speed and you moaned into his mouth as you got closer to the edge and with one last circle of his thumb, you contracted around his fingers, Chibs smiling against your lips as he pulled his fingers out and you rolled on top of him.

Chibs' hand found your waist and you reached across to the bedside table and grabbed the condoms before removing it from its packet and rolling it down on his shaft. With one last nod from him, you grabbed his cock and sunk down, Chibs grunting as you bottomed out.

You rocked your hips slowly, moaning when Chibs' fingers found your clit. Chibs met your pace as you sped up, bucking into you while he moaned your name through gritted teeth. His hands moved to your hips as he took over, the head of his cock brushing your G-spot as he pushed your closer to the edge.

His fingers circled your clit with purpose, the orgasm taking you by surprise as he slammed inside you. You crumpled into his chest and Chibs ran his hands up and down your back while kissing your neck as he chased his own high, rolling his hips until his teeth sunk into your shoulder and he came inside you.

You rolled off him and Chibs followed you, pulling you into his arms as you pressed your face into his chest, "that was great, I'm totally excited for more."

Chibs smiled and pressed his lips to you forehead, "me too."

Fin

[butmakeitgayblog]

Do you have any advice for fan fiction writers who aren't getting many readers etc? I feel like giving up some days but I love writing and find fan fiction my personal therapy if that makes sense. I'd love any advice you can give or any suggestions. 💕

Well, honestly I'm not any kind of authority so take whatever I say with a grain of salt. Because honestly, I never really thought I'd get any kind of following to begin with 😕 this surprised me, and still does to this day, more than anyone. When I started posting my first fic (very nervously and through the feeling like I was going to throw up) I thought "well, I'll just write a few chapters and probably no one will ever read it and I'll get bored and it'll be out of my system." And now here we are, and I have no idea how that happened 😳

What advice I can give is, you can't write for the sake of other people. I know that sounds cheap as hell because the whole point of sharing fic is to get feedback and interact with others in the fandom, but really at the heart of it you have to just write stories that you like and you want to read above everything else. Keep writing. Keep growing. Keep refining your work and your style so no matter what the view count is, you know you're becoming a better writer regardless. And truth be told, you never know what idea or fic will hit with readers and what won't. You may write something and think oh no one is gonna gaf about this and then out of nowhere, that's what people love. It happens more than you know.

Another thing is - and this is going to sound harsh at first but bear with me please - in this day and age sadly you have to manage your expectations. Not because you don't deserve more readers or comments or because your work isn't good, but because the culture of fandom and fanfic/fanart is changing, and not for the better. There's dozens of posts that make the rounds on here passively warning people about how a lot of writers and artists are getting burned out and fed up with the lack of reciprocal community from their audience. Tiktok and IG and all that shit has kind of ruined the landscape of fandom because now everything is seen as just consumption based. More and more people read a fic and move on, binge a show and move on, burn through a fandom's entire AO3 content in 3 months and move on, and it sucks. I mean when you look at fandoms of old, the days of Xena and Buffy for example, a lot of those fans are still around and still participating and still creating work even though the show/fandom/ships are long gone. You don't really see that loyalty much anymore, and it becomes a cycle of the fandom shrinking and then the feedback and comments and support grinds to a halt, and then creators stop feeling like wasting hours of their life to pour themselves into work that gets maybe a handful of comments even though they see hundreds or thousands of people have read it. It just sucks all around. So expecting to see the numbers that a fic did even 3-5 years ago, sadly, just isn't going to happen.

BUT

I do also know this, the Clexa fandom has been one of the best fandoms I've ever been in, both as just a fan on the outskirts and someone who tries to contribute. I've found Clexas to be funny and welcoming and we have a core group of fucking awesome and loyal, supportive readers, but the thing is you have to keep going. Sometimes building an audience and a regular group of readers takes time. Name recognition matters. Yes there are writers out there that are just synonymous with the fandom, but there's other writers (hi yes hello me, I mean me lol) who came late to the party and it's taken some time to get people to see their work. Tagging things and reblogging, talking in tags, reaching out to other people in the fandom and making friends who want to help you with your work because you help support theirs. All that stuff. It makes a difference. Damn near every week or so I get a new reader saying "wow idk how I hadn't heard of you before/read your stuff before but I'm glad I found it, keep going!" And that 100% will never have even the possibility of happening if you stop writing!

In the end, you just have to decide what's best for you. If this feels incredibly unhelpful I truly am sorry, I wish I had better advice to give you but I'm as clueless to this all as you are. But 2 things I do know for sure without a doubt? One, there is a place for you in any fandom, and your work does matter. There is an audience out there who want to read what you have to write and they'll love it. And two, in the end just be kind to yourself. Love yourself and be proud of yourself for trying, and for being creative and growing your work. Fanfic is supposed to be fun, writing about your favorite blorbos is meant to be fun, even if more often than not it feels like the equivalent of just dancing alone in your kitchen. Ya get what I mean?

[safyresky]

Real talk, is ao3 better? Should I remove my story from ffnet and post it on ao3 instead to get better traction?

Honestly, it's really hard to say! I certainly don't have a definitive answer for you. Personally I think the whole ao3/ff dot net situation is very much up to each user's personal preferences, so I'll share my thoughts and maybe that'll help you make a decision that you're happy with?

I will say, that though I am crossposting, I am NOT going to be taking down my stories from ff dot net. Unless I make them original work and then have to bc LEGALITIES or whatever, lol.

See, the thing is people do still use ff dot net! And a lot of stories exist there that don't exist on ao3! And a lot of people don't use ao3! That's why I keep mine up there and have been updating on both platforms as best as I can :)

In terms of which is BETTER, that all depends on user experience, lol. For posting, I'm finding that I really like ao3! I'm a HUGE FAN of how the update interface works--the separation of Notes from the actual text, the tagging system, and how easy it is to pop in and edit post-posting a new fic/chapter/whatever :)

For reading, while ao3 is easier on the eyes and has 0 ads, I have a very hard time dealing with the huge amount of filters. ESPECIALLY since the sections for media also include the crossovers. I like the ff dot net separates the crossovers from the regular non-crossover fic automatically!

Of course, this is a LITTLE pet peeve of mine lol and the first thing I do in any category when searching for fic is filter OUT crossovers, and then the more intense M rated tag-esque stuff that I personally am not a fan of (though some people do like that and that's a-okay! What's gr8 about ao3 is that there's no like, ban on what you can write. It's not censored, that's the word I'm looking for! Another pro to ao3 if you wanna write some nitty-gritty angst or dark fic or what have you). Quite frankly, the amount of tags and filters going on is gr8 for stories and curating your reading experience! Lots of text just hurts my eyes, but I've been adjusting!

In terms of traction, ao3 may have a better platform for a wider audience. For starters, their stats aren't broken right now, so that's a pro! ff dot nets legacy stats are broken, so hits haven't been showing up, though comments and updates are coming through--just not the e-mails if you've opted out. Which they automatically do now bc of a gnarly spam problem the last few years. And the comment system is a lot more robust than ff dot net's PM replies and the like.

Overall, ao3 is easier to use and offers more in terms of categorizing your fics! I'd recommend posting to ao3 100% :). I know that my older fics won't get as many numbers as they did on ff dot net and that's okay! i keep them up on there for those that prefer it still over ao3, and for me to go back and see the reviews and the like.

If you do decide to take everything down from ff dot net, save save save! Backup the stories you have, download them, and take snapshots of any reviews you like, bc once they're gone, they're gone, and idk about you, but I LOVE going back and reading the reviews I have over on ff dot net!

tl;dr: both sites have their merits; ao3 has way more staff, and more opportunities for engagement, as well as easier layouts for posting and commenting. FF dot net isn't going anywhere, but has a much smaller staff and has changed some things about notifications, so definitely double check your e-mail settings. If you take stuff down from ff dot net, save your work first! And any reviews you're fond of, too!

But overall, deffs try ao3 before jumping ship. It may not work for everyone; I avoided it for YEARS bc it was hard for me to get used to and it has been a VERY slow crawl for myself in learning how it works, but BOY is it hella customizable and easy to use and I like it!!!

[ironwoodprotectionsquad]

So I think you're referring to my post here and I would like to apologize for my flippant attitude in my original post towards the tooic of ironwoods backstory. In all honesty, I've been recently frustrated with the flippant attitude the writers have towards him and so the post want meant to be mostly facetious rather than the typical mocking of the character among the fandom (which also rubs me the wrong way) - but I understand with my joking tone and word choice it came off very horribly and that's my own fault for being careless and crass.

(also I do not know how the post ended up in the ironwood tag since I don't recall tagging it purposefully in that way. I try not to tag non-serious posts in the main RWBY or character tags too often -.- but I apologize for that too. I also hate it when people tag hate for characters I like.)

Anyways, I've liked your blog for a while and what you have to say so I'd hate to be on bad terms with you! I'm sorry for any upset feelings I've caused on top of everything else recently ~~~

Hey their anon. I really appreciate your ask and I apologize for jumping to assumptions about what your post was supposed to be about. It has been a long and frustrating week within the James tag and in the heat of the moment I assumed it was just more bullshit piling onto the whole mess of a situation. It's just unfortunate the FNDM is just so.....bad about this its easy to think something is being said seriously and not register it is supposed to be facetious. I have trouble with trusting intentions of people I don't know, and that is not your fault or problem it's just what's happened with my nearly a year (wow I didn't even last a year) of being in the fandom. Their are unfortunately really nasty people who have said things like "It's James's fault he lost his arm" or "He's not really disabled" or "It's his fault he lost half of his body" which is why I jumped to the conclusion I did.

Oh I know exactly how it wound up in the tag, Tumblr's tagging system is truly a joke and even if you don't tag something if you use a specific word, in this case "Ironwood" the post will start showing up in his tag because for some reason Tumblr's tagging system doesn't just use tags it also uses the text itself for some idiotic reason. If people want to avoid their posts showing up in the tags they'll do things like RW//BY or Ironw00d and that seems to work well from what people have said.

Thank you, I really appreciate you reaching out and I do again apologize for jumping to conclusions. Thank you for giving me a chance and reaching out, I really appreciate it. We all make mistakes (myself included) for me at least, being willing to reach out and apologize and change is what is most important. I would love to chat more if you of course are willing and I do apologize again for jumping to conclusions.

[revui]

Quin seems like a fun character but I have nothing to go by beyond Foreverlands and a few memes. I saw on your blog that you're down for talking abt your OCs though. So! Do you have any fun facts about Quin?

what if i [kisses anon on the mouth]

fr this is one of the best things i could've woken up to in my inbox although by the time i finish this it definitely won't be the morning anymore

SO QUIN. Quintilian Holmes. Here's a random fact before I really get going, looking at the posts that I have tagged as Quin, the oldest one is actually referring to a completely different character, and their name was Quindecim. They wound up sharing nicknames by accident. Anyway, from this point forward, this post is now all about Quin-as-in-Quintilian and not Quin-as-in-Quindecim.

So, the thing about Quin is that he's very emotional, he's very artistic, and he's very observant. He's also highkey brimming with rage at all moments in time. When people read "emotional" they sometimes forget that incandescent fury is an emotion, and it happens to be one he wears well. But it's very easy for people to overlook that because he tries quite hard to avoid showing that. He tries to act like a Guy Not Full Of Anger and partially succeeds, but anyone who really knows him is very aware of (and wary of) this part of him.

His major role in the actual story that I've been writing with him (I only post the random episodic stuff I think of) is as someone who's trying to solo the entire government. He pops up a few times earlier but his first big appearance is when he's in the middle of his plan to topple the whole system.

He's from a place called Ivory Ridge, a now-destroyed town which was a safe-haven for demons. "Demon" as a term is very loose in the Foreverlands. It just refers to any humanoid who isn't a human. Actual demons are hard to come by in the present—you'll pretty exclusively find descendants and people with demonic heritage instead of actual full-on demons. Quin is descended from dryad-like demons. After Ivory Ridge got destroyed, Quin got adopted by his moms, Mildred and Emelia Snow.

Switching topics entirely, glyphs. He brings those up quite a lot in the chapter, and the weird thing is that they're kind of a lost art. Quin isn't fully aware of this. Glyphs are essentially tiny symbols that "code" the magical world of the Foreverlands, and when you notice certain patterns (such as a symbol that seems to code for creatures being able to change color), you can mix-and-match different glyph symbols into a whole new glyph. If you mix the symbol that codes for color-changing with a symbol that codes for a lattice-shaped structure in a bush, you can use this new glyph to... I don't know, transmute your blue fence into bright orange lattice.

The reason he uses glyphs is somewhat related to his disability. Sorcerers can use magic because they have a special organ that turns the magic in the world around them into something they can actually wield, and Quin's doesn't work properly, and to put it very very simply, this results in him having "less magic" than other sorcerers. He medicates for this but still has an easier time just using glyphs instead of other focuses because they're smaller, easier to carry, and his special interest. That's right, boys. Autism is about glyphs.

Quin's an artist who is constantly filling his pockets with crumpled papers and pens and looking for new stuff to draw. He likes other arts like sculpting, carving, and pottery, but he's not as good at those and usually doesn't have the tools on hand like he does for drawing.

Colum's also from Ivory Ridge and the two have known each other since they were three. Quin still has a crush on him. Quin knows this fact. Quin hates this fact. His standards are basically "be a person, breathe oxygen" and yet he's only ever been on a single date, mostly by accident, because he didn't realize his classmate was asking him out in a romantic way instead of a friendly way. If ever asked on a date (assuming he actually realizes it's a date), he would dress in his weirdest clothes so that whoever he's dating knows what they're getting into ahead of time.

He's my little skrinkly.

His favorite color is pink, which happens to be his hair color, but he prefers more vibrant shades of pink, especially those that lean closer to purple, while his hair color is a sort of pastel pink instead which he really dislikes. Speaking of his hair. It's very curly and he never has any clue what to do with it, so he just kind of leaves it there to do its thing and hopes for the best. It ranges from "halfway decent" to "I was just in a wind tunnel" and he's stopped trying to keep it under any modicum of control.

He's got freckles. Lots of them.

He's very bad at holding himself to plans and deadlines and has made a habit of showing up to things late, or not at all. He was actually almost ten minutes late to his definitely-not-a-date and agreed to a second one only because he felt bad about that, and then they never showed up to the second date so Quin went home and carved a little wooden bird statue instead. Her name is Toodle.

Alright, insane ramblings over. This was a lot of fun :D

[caspercryptid]

📯New pinned post + Request Guidelines 📯

It's been a while and some things have changed so I'm gonna make this one fresh!

Hi I'm Casper, I'm a semi-professional queer author currently hyperfixating on Arcane ((And only murders in the building, and Our Flag Means Death)) like a motherfucker. ND + Disabled + Trans. If you have a problem with any of those categories, perhaps move along.

I tag my fics with #casper's haunted fic tag but considering tumblr's ask system, maybe just use my arcane fic archive to read my stuff, or my #original fiction tag (please?) I tag asks with #casper's haunted info tag so if you're looking for my answers to your questions, check there! I've got some other Casper's haunted tags and I'll make a full list another time. #disability info is the tag I use for both discussion of disability in arcane and also advocacy stuff I reblog. If you ever want me to tag stuff more specifically, please let me know. 

Also on the record, reply times on all asks will vary, I’m a spoonie and I don’t always have the energy for social interaction! You have my love. I am easily worn out. 

🕊️ Twitter — 📖 Ao3 — ☕ Ko-Fi — 🔨 The Hammer To Fall Discord

Sideblogs:

@fuckyeahjaycetalis - JAYCE

@thebeelog - BEES

@theasperagroup - original project vibes (the description of which is here)

Now! Request Guidelines. [[Requests are closed right now, but here’s the rules for when they’re open!]]

Although if you guys happen to get attached to my OCs and want to see more of them, HMU, because that's Always Welcome.

Here is a list of suggestions for AUs and ships.

Now for the slightly less fun stuff.

I love writing rarepairs and I love crack ships and I love doing Weird Stuff. That being said, here is The Please Don't List.

Please don't spam requests as it takes up space in my inbox and I can only hold so many before I close it again! Give everybody a fair shot

Please don't send me requests that describe the entire plot of a fic. If you've got the whole concept, that's great! You should try writing it and I will support you. If there's not room for me to take my own direction, or you've described your own characterizations that don't match mine, that's not really fun for me to write! And so I won't.

Please don't send me requests where you ask that disabled characters (Viktor) be insecure about their body or their disability. I'm not comfortable writing that.

And the hopefully pretty short No list—

I will not write jinx with anyone significantly older than she is, nor will I answer requests that call her powder. My jinx is trans.

I will not write Caitlyn/Jayce, as I write them as siblings

I will not write ship content with Ambessa, as I'm not comfortable with her treatment of Mel in the show

I will not write E rated content unless it has been discussed with me beforehand or it's a continuation of a previous fic. I'm gray ace and I can't really manage that on command.

Okay! You got through the negative stuff. Here's some lighter logistics notes.

please sign your anon asks with an emoji! I think it's cute and it helps me pick up trends or threads and to keep from getting confused. I am disabled and making things more accessible for me is really sweet of you

If you start your request with "tell me a story about" I am a hundred times more likely to answer you fast bc I think that's the cutest shit ever

I make no guarantees that I can write EVERY ship but if you send me two characters I will do my best. They may not always kiss. I will give you content. If you want strictly platonic that's cool too!! Familial relationships? People you think would be friends? Just wanna see em vibe or coparent or something? Hit me.

Feel free to spam likes and reblogs! Go ham! PLEASE reblog, especially if you're the one who requested, it's just a nice way to share my stuff. And talk in the tags! Go ham!

Requests will be answered out of order whenever I have inspiration I make no guarantees about what goes up when

And I think that's that! I'll add to this if I think of something else or if something happens that reminds me that this needs to be updated. Thanks for reading!

[roughentumble]

Tagged by @hale-of-stiles-heart

Name: shawn

Sign: cancer the crabbbbb pinchpinch

Height: 5'3

Current time: after 0100

Favorite band/musical artists: im indecisive as hell, i cant pick favorites lol. as a kid i liked paramore, three days grace, system of a down... i also like more indie stuff, like penelope scott, and music to cry to(leonard cohen comes to mind). oh and j-pop too, kanon wakeshima, utada hikaru, ikimonogakari, the usual crew. kyary pamyu pamyu but i havent heard anything abt her in ages, i guess she fell out of popularity. ninjari bang bang still slaps tho. ummmm. other stuff. i have a whole music tag to give you an idea of what i listen to!

Last Movie: i watched SOMETHING the other day but honestly i cant remember what it was(which does not bode well for thing in question) so let's just say Nope.

Last Show: i think its called requiem? it was a netflix/bbc limited series, 6 episodes. it was pretty decent, tho i maintain the spooky creatures were NOT ANGELS they were FAIRIES, it makes way more sense if theyre fairies.

Blog created: mmmmm a while ago. 2012? maybe younger idk. i remade at one point so we'll never know the exact year

What I post: memes, whatever random rambling bullshit that crosses my mind, gay people, fandom stuff, geraskier

Last Google search: . literally "". i thought it was an incorrectly displaying emoji and thought emojidex would pop up with an actual image

Other blogs: is secret shhhh 🤫 ;)

Do you get asks: i been known to, ye! got a nice anon or two floatin around.

Following: 867

Followers: 998

Sleep schedule: aint got one, i like stayin up late tho

Do you play instruments? currently? nah. but over my lifetime i've done guitar, ukulele, ocarina.... probably some piano as a wee babe... i think like violin or something..... oh and obviously recorder lol xp

Currently wearing: soft pants an soft shirt. for sleepy times

Dream job: its changed so many times over the years i dont even know at this point. i guess the true dream is just getting one super major ultra best seller of some kind and coating off the money for the rest of All Time

Dream trip: idk, lots of places would be fun to go, but im going to ireland next year and hopefully that'll be really cool! and i always wanted to go to japan as a kid, so maybe like the ghibli museum would be cool

Nationality: US.

Favorite song: seconding amber here, i could never pick a fav.

Last book: i mean im currently reading samuel butler's translation of the iliad

idk who to tag so i shan't. lol

[crazy-loca-blog]

Casey Valentine: About Her Future

A/N: This has been one hell of a ride! Talking about Casey and her life has been an amazing experience. There are many situations about her future that I haven't figured out yet, that's why I'm keeping things in a very limited timeframe (around 2 and maybe 3 years after the end of her residency). Thanks a lot to @openheartfanfics for organizing this event. I've had a blast!

Meet My MC || About Her Past || About Her Present

Casey has been leading the diagnostics team for over two years now. And things have changed a lot.

As soon as she assumed her new role, she was determined to make the team the core of a system that also involves the rest of the departments at Edenbrook. And she uses her friends for it.

Casey, Ines and Jackie are implementing a special program to evaluate interns and residents in order to discover outstanding doctors that may support the diagnostics team and other areas in the hospital after their boards. It follows a lot of the guidelines that Ethan used when they were interns, but it also gives selected residents an opportunity to assist the diagnostics team in some cases in order to improve their skills.

Elijah and Zaid became her go-to people when it comes to studies and reseach, especially in those cases where experimental treatments are the only option for patients.

Sienna quickly became a team favorite. As the best pediatrician at Edenbrook, every time the team receives a pediatric case, she is involved in the course of treatment of the patient. Casey is considering to offer her a permanent spot in the team.

Bryce's research skills when it comes to evaluate surgical options for patients are brilliant, so he frequently helps Harper by giving her second opinions on certain procedures. He also covers for her as member of the diagnostics team every time she's on leave.

When a patient needs rehab after some surgery, Rafael is the one in charge of the process. The results his patients achieve in their recovery are proof that he has all the profesionalism, the patience and the work ethics the team needs in their collaborators.

As per Baz and Ethan, Casey convinced them to keep collaborating with the team on an ocassional basis. They are one of the best immunologists and the best diagnostician in the country, so she needs their brains in her team, even if it's not permanently. They assist in the hardest and most enigmatic cases.

Despite all their efforts, the team can't accept every case they receive. And that's when Kenmore help is appreciated. A year ago, Tobias, Casey and Aurora developed a collaboration project between the diagnostics teams of both hospitals, which now allows both Edenbrook and Kenmore to help twice the amount of people they used to assist when they worked separately.

Of course, none of this would be possible without Ethan's help. As Chief of Medicine, he has the power to approve most of Casey's projects, so he's been making a very good use of a position that he wasn't convinced to accept at first. It's definitely been a win-win situation when it comes to team work between Dr. Ramsey and Dr. Valentine.

Despite of them being very private when it comes to their personal lives, there is no doubt that Casey and Ethan are relationship goals. If seeing them working together in the past was a delight, the way they've been ruling Edenbrook after becoming official has certainly helped them become the power couple the hospital needed.

Because you can definitely tell they're not only great partners, but also each other's best friend. Their nonverbal communication skills are at a whole different level and they certainly boost each other in a way you can tell they're the best thing that has ever happened to the other. They're in love and it shows.

That's why no one was surprised when, after 8 months of becoming official, they decided to move in together.

But everybody was surprised when Ethan proposed only a few months afterwards. Except for his dad and her brother (who were the only people who knew about his plans), literally no one saw it coming, not even Casey (because yes, Ethan has mastered the art of surprising her).

They almost canceled the wedding... twice. The stress of their jobs plus the chaos that involves planning a wedding was beginning to affect their wellbeing as individuals. It wasn't a big issue for any of them: Casey never cared about having a ring on her finger and they both knew that nothing about their relationship would change if they didn't sign a piece of paper, as they were certain they had sealed the deal a long time ago.

The thought of an elopement also crossed their minds... and right when they were about to do it, Sienna came up with a brilliant idea to save their original plan: a micro wedding, that took place 6 months ago.

These newlyweds like saying they have a family of four: Ethan's dad and Casey's brother are pretty much the only relatives they have, so they consider them part of their household. They even have their own rooms in their new home in Boston!

They'd both agree that getting used to wear a ring has probably been the hardest part of their marriage, even when they cared about buying bands that were "compatible" with their jobs. But they are pretty sure that if they take it off, they'll end up losing it, so they kind of gave up. They expect to get used to it over time.

When they're not at work, they love exploring all the hidden gems that Boston has to offer. They've found a bunch of great places thanks to Rafael's recommendations, but they have also discovered a lot of new places by themselves. That doesn't mean they don't enjoy a good date at home after an exhausting day at work or getting lost and disconnecting from the world for a full weekend without telling anyone where they are.

This philosophy of discovering new places also applies to their holidays. Sometimes they'd go to well-known places, but they both agree that their favorite trips are those where they visit underrated destinations. Of course, they also leave a few days to visit Alan in Providence and to go to Casey's home in Virginia.

Kids? They have talked about it, but they don't feel ready to take that step yet. Not only their jobs are very demanding, they both have some baggage they need to get rid of before thinking about becoming parents. They're not in a hurry though, they're convinced that everything happens for a reason... they are happy, and that's all that matters.

She may not live with them anymore, but the roomies (and the rest of the gang) are still incredibly close. Casey still has lunch with whoever is available almost every day, and they still have a booth with their names on it at Donahue's.

When Casey moved in with Ethan, they didn't search for a new roomie. With the exception of Sienna, they all were attendings, so it was easier for them fo afford Casey's part ot the rent. They decided to turn her room into an office they all use a lot.

And none of them has the intention to leave their apartment any time soon. Housing in Boston is incredibly expensive, and they know none of them could afford a place like the one they have by themselves. This also gives them a chance to get rid of their med school debt a little faster.

Jackie, Aurora, Sienna and Casey also host a "girls just want to have fun" event at the apartment whenever Elijah visits his parents. It's a bonding tradition they started during their residency and they have no intention to finish any time soon. Sometimes, Kyra (when she is in town), Ines and Angie join them as well.

Bryce is the person she relies on when she needs a brotherly figure. She can definitely see a lot of her brother on him, and he always seem to have the right answer to everything. He also had to get a bigger place, as Keiki returned to Boston after being accepted at Harvard. Casey and Jackie guided her to attend med school... and convinced her to become a diagnostician.

The gang never knows when Kyra is going to make some surprise visit. She's been travelling around the world for a long time now, but she's been back home a few times for special ocasions. The last time they saw her was for Casey and Ethan's wedding.

Sienna and Casey have been exchanging recipes for a while now. Casey can cook to survive, but Ethan takes cooking to a whole new level, so Sienna usually comes to the rescue when her bestie needs help.

Casey is also playing matchmaker between Sienna and Rafael. She has been observing the way they look at each other for a while, and she's convinced they would make the cutest couple ever. Because beautiful souls deserve to be together. So yeah, she most definitely will introduce Sienna and Rafael's vovo very soon with some "help me cook dinner" excuse.

Tags: @adiehardfan @izzyourresidentlawyer

[heresathreebee]

Brackish and Briny Waters (five)

[Ralph Lamont x Female Reader]

Summary: Ralph apologizes and you've got baby brains, but sometimes life does nothing but kick you down. Previous Masterlist Next

Tag(s): 16+ | 1.7k words | more angst, baby fever, alcoholism, ghostly vibes

AN: GODDAMN Part 5 took me a lifetime to finish. As always no beta readers just poorly side eyeing this by myself and hoping it makes sense

THE NEXT MORNING

You barely stir when you hear the door open. You've all but forgotten last night, and yet you flinch when Ralphie tries to cuddle with you. He sighs somewhere near your ear and hugs you from behind anyways, lips brushing the nape of your neck and breath fanning over your back as he simply lies there, quiet as the grave. 

There's no bruise but you can still feel his hand gripping your arm from last night. "You're being a huge dick…" 

"... I know." 

That is not good enough. You roll over to face him and watch his face twist when he notices the tract marks of dry tears on your face. He swallows and almost unconsciously takes your hand, smoothing his thumb over the back of your palm in a way that was meant to comfort him rather than you. 

"I'm sorry." He opens his mouth again but he flounders for words. After a deep breath he continues. "We can't call Reagan. Because he won't do anything for us…" 

You wait impatiently for him to explain. 

"Sweetheart, if we called Reagan last night, he would have fucking laughed at us. It is step one down that slippery slope to the couple who cried wolf." He put a hand on your shoulder and looked you in the eye, "do you really think he would have done something?" 

You think about it. If Ralph hadn't stopped you from calling him, what would you have said to Reagan? 

I smelled exhaust fumes. Not an emergency, he would say. 

I think he found us. What do you want me to do about it, too late now, he would ask.  

We're in danger. I'll send a squad upstate, they should be there in 4 hours, he would joke. 

"It was real," you insist. "I smelled fumes." 

"I know. I believe you." 

You squint at him threateningly and he doesn't give an inch. He doesn't seem like he's mocking you. 

Ralph could be an asshole, but Reagan was infinitely worse. At least one of them gave a shit about your safety. The realization Ralph was right scared you more than anything. You were alone in this… 

Well, alone together. 

You sigh and bury your face in his neck. Your hair is tangled as shit and probably tickling his face, but your husband simply wraps you up in a tight embrace and holds you against him. It's all the apology you need. 

END OF THE FIRST MONTH

Adjusting to your new life hit you like a sack of bricks early on a Monday morning. You woke up from a dream where you still lived in your tiny little apartment two minutes walk from everything. In a reality which felt more like a fever dream, Ralph was late for work, donning a tie and tweed jacket and kissing you goodbye for the day. 

You never realized how much space there was in the new master bedroom. In the apartment, a queen sized bed nearly touched the walls and barely left room to creep around two night stands and a dresser, but in the new house you had room to lay on the floor and stretch, maybe put another piece of furniture in here like a bookshelf or something. 

And the whole damn house was like that. You had an entire second floor to claim as your own! There is almost too much space… too much space for just the two of you. 

God there's that thought again drifting into your mind unbidden, unfurling like a fern at the first droplet of sunshine. How many people does it take to turn a house into a home? Three should be plenty, your mind offers. 

You busy yourself with measurements, regrouting the loose tiles in the kitchen floor, and scrubbing the blackened hell out of that downstairs bathroom. It seems to come to life beneath your hands and you can feel yourself getting excited to show guests the improvement. 

The thoughts of turning your little twosome family into three persist over and over until you can't stand it any longer. Maybe it's finally time… 

Ralph's late getting home by 5 minutes instead of 5 hours but he still looks tired. No mud tracks on his pants or hard set eyes. He's halfway up the stairs before you realize he's probably going to bed early. 

"Hey!" 

Ralph stops like it pains him. His head sags and his hold on the railing is tight like he'll fall if he lets go. The way he's wobbling he might. He is barely able to meet your eyes as he glances over his shoulder and when he does he simply grunts. 

"I made dinner," you squeeze your hands together behind your back, "angel hair pasta and that sauce you love." 

Ralph's eyes flicker in thought. "Be down in a second." 

You wait nervously to see if he does come down. What if this is a bad idea? What if he doesn't take you seriously? Oh god what if he hates it, what if he calls you an idiot for even considering it? 

Ralph does come back downstairs, hair wild from running his fingers through it. He seems to gain a small amount of energy while eating, not wanting to talk himself but asking how your day has been going. 

You're definitely rambling right now. Ralph listens and listens, chuckling along but at some point he grows concerned and envelopes your hand with a worried expression on his face. "Jesus, I've never heard so many words come out of your mouth at once, it's like you're writing a dissertation over there. Are you OK, baby?" 

You snap your mouth shut. God, you hadn't even come close to talk about kids for all your rambling. And then there was that weird smell… 

Your blood runs cold as you recognize it. You lean a little closer to Ralph and he almost instinctively flinches away. If there's one thing you are sure of, one thing you could swear on god– Ralph Lamont has never flinched away from a kiss before. So he has something to hide. And that something has a sharp scent and explains his slow reactions and tired eyes better than anything else could. 

"Have you… have you been drinking?" 

It's the way he can't meet your eyes when you ask him. You know. It's beyond out of character, so much so that it's confusing and a little frightening for you. 

A little drink here and there is, to you, to be expected especially considering the wealth of your new company. So why hide it? Is there something else he's not telling you?

You suddenly feel sick and too hot, ripping your hand away from his and getting up to leave the table. 

He knows you get in your head sometimes and practically yells your name to stop you. "I'm… I don't know why I…" 

Ralph sighs and buries his face into his hands, ashamed. All this suspense is twisting knots in your stomach. You sit back down gingerly, taking deep breaths to calm yourself down. 

"Ralph," you warn, "you had better start explaining yourself right now before I lose it." 

Ralph stares a hole into the table and worries his lip. The truth is he doesn't know what to say because he doesn't know why he did it. The students are easy, you are easy. Even in the toughest of times, at his lowest, he didn't drink so… what the fuck was coming over him?, he asked himself. 

Something clicked. It rolled like fire in his belly given dry wood, smoking curling to the top of his throat and out of his ears. "They hate me." 

"Who? Who hates you?" 

"Everyone." 

You looked him in the eye for the first time tonight and saw something dark looking in there. It makes you uneasy. "What makes you think they hate you, baby?" 

Ralph's grip on his fork tightens until his knuckles are white before he gingerly sets the dishware down and deflates. He clicks his tongue and shakes his head with a sardonic grin. 

"You wouldn't understand… and how could you? You never leave the house." He looks at you and there's a growing instability rising in his movements. "You… you don't see it. It started out as little nothings that I could ignore because it didn't matter that they didn't like me: I was new.  

"Then it became lots of these little nothings. Staring and whispering and hushed silences. Tip toeing language and poking and prodding and testing me and my limits and it just… it just… it never got better…" 

Rumors. It dawned on you that his frustration seemed intimately familiar to you as you had had to change schools once or twice due to a few terrible rumors that snowballed and got way out of hand. And you can imagine the sort of rumors that accompany a man with little interest in making friends who has a wife nobody knows anything about. 

If you wanted to stay here long, you would need to change a few minds. You set aside your fear for a moment and make him look at you. You can see the unshed tears in his eyes and feel pity for him. 

"I want to do that dinner party," you announce. "With all that's gone on, you probably didn't have the grand introduction you deserve. Let me show them how much you mean to me." 

Ralph's shaking his head but he already knows you'll win this fight. For him it feels like begging for something he doesn't even want. He agrees because he already promised you could when you were ready and you needed to find new friends asap. 

His sleep that night is fitful and the room's shadows seem to reach out like claws seeking his immortal soul. When the haze of whiskey finally dies down in his system he sleeps dreamless and wakes to feel somehow more hollow with despair than before. 

Ralph Lamont has the distinct feeling things are going to get a hell of a lot worse before anything gets better…

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