#Identifying Triggers

[unwelcome-ozian]

[schizodiaries]

I think I’ve finally identified my triggers for psychosis. (I’m comfortable sharing these publicly because they can’t be weaponized by other people.)

Not sleeping/eating is a big one, although it’s hard to tell if it causes psychosis or if psychosis causes it. It’s a chicken and egg situation. Either way they go hand in hand.

Extreme stress also triggers my psychosis. Fortunately I haven’t been in very stressful situations recently so I don’t expect to be psychotic anytime soon.

Depression is also major one. The more depressed I am the more likely I am to experience delusions. This is why I try so hard to keep my mood stable by any means.

This one’s a little obvious but weed is another trigger. Nowadays I use it in moderation and for the most part it helps me but there’s always a slight chance of having weed-induced psychosis.

[creekfiend]

Something I've learned recently is that there's multiple ways you can respond when you identify hypocrisy in yourself.... like, supposing you notice that you have treated someone in a way that is not in line with your values. You COULD beat yourself up about it and be like "ugh you hypocrite, you SAY you have x values but then you treated these people in this other way"

Or, and I think this qualifies much better as "taking responsibility for your actions": you can go "huh. I definitely do have x values and believe people should be treated in these ways... and much of the time I am able to behave in ways that are in line with those values... and yet under these specific circumstances I was for some reason not able to do that. Let's look at those situations and people and try to find some patterns there so I can identify what types of scenarios make it hard for me to behave according to my values"

And then when you identify situations like that in the future, you can try and give yourself the time and space to really process stuff and try to remind yourself "this is a situation where behaving according to my values has been difficult in the past" which will help you be more intentional and careful in how you proceed.

Anyway. That's hard but it's a big relief to do because it really feels like being armed with magical knowledge lolol

[ginganthropy]

syscord: you cant have your source as your pfp if its problematic also you have to be completely source separated to the point where ur basically a brainmade or else ur actively harming your mental health also your gucci flop flops are creased so we're gonna have to ban you

people IRL: hey man how are you

[gobstoppr]

more harm than good

alt ver. under the cut

[osddid-i-do-that]

It’s easy for people to criticize protectors for how we react to perceived threats —

Some of us get defensive, some of us get loud, or completely freeze up, or run for safety, or suddenly collapse and can’t move, or become mute, or have extreme fawn reactions … and to the outside, it seems over the top.

Or maybe you think it’s not fair that we saw you as a threat because you got angry and yelled. Maybe you think it’s childish that we sprinted out of the house or scary that we kicked into “fight” mode.

We had to identify threats fast. We had to do what it took to survive. To protect our system and our physical body and mind.

And we can and should learn to react more proportionally. But our instincts aren’t ridiculous or made to victimize you. They made sense in the traumatic environment that created us. They’re the only reason we’re still here now.

We still fall back on that because it worked and we survived.

[clannfearrunt]

sorry for the unsolicited suggestions, i've struggled with bad skin issues myself so i was curious: does wax-coating the area do anything for you? i keep a few clean chapsticks for when my hands get really bad and it helps keep it from getting worse as long as i use a mild or unflavored one.

That sounds like a good tip for people who can stand it! Sensory problems are a big limiting factor in what I can try re; skin management, and I can't stand chapstick. I haven't tried it on my hands, though, so maybe it'll be more tolerable than on my lips. I might give it a try if I can find something that looks good. Generally I know the thicker the substance the more effective it tends to be for retaining moisture, but if it's too thick it is Hell and it will activate the skin picking response.

Right now Toplan's baby moisturizing cream has been doing wonders for everything except for my hands! Even with my hands it tends to help a lot in managing the dry stage of the dyshidrotic eczema Cycle, but it can't do fuck all about the fluid buildup stage which is the part that Gets You.

This thing awesome it successfully skirts the line between not being so thick that it causes sensory problems or leaves residue everywhere and being too thin to be worth a damn. I do have to reapply it relatively more frequently but I think that's somewhat unavoidable when it's hands. It also doesn't have an annoying scent added to it; there's still a gentle aroma to it but it's not a Scent Scent if you know what I mean.

Honestly most of my shit other than The Hands are fairly well managed these days thanks to this thing, but main problems unique to The Hands are

because it is hands, I use them, and so I touch a lot of things and whatever I use rubs off quicker than other places

because it is hands, I wash them. I reapply lotion a lot, of course, but it's still an irritating factor that I can't really avoid much

the type of eczema just fundamentally behaves differently from what I'm used to having to deal with elsewhere, with the main trigger being the simple unavoidable fact that it is summer (REST IN PIECES)

[unwelcome-ozian]

[zeroducks-2]

Me in 2018, writing a specific whump dynamic that makes me tear up, gag and feel like I'm going to be physically sick: OH wow I wonder what's wrong with me today hahaha haha

Me in 2023, still tearing up, gagging and feeling like I'm going to be physically sick every time I write that specific whump dynamic: Hey it only took me five years to identify a trigger! I'm so smart!!

[annamaryllis]

I would like to know exactly how luke asking annabeth to run away with him went down.

[henriiiii-1001old]

catalyst sketches!

made some catalyst sketches in my sketchbook!!!! the one on the left might become digital but we’ll see!!!!!

[apphiarothowrites]

(Not your average) Blushing Maiden

(Or, "An Introduction to Zoan Anatomy"-zoan anatomy 101 remix) I'd also like to dedicate this version of the idea to @xamaxenta

Marco eats his fruit three weeks before his 17th birthday. It takes him exactly 1 hour to notice that something has dramatically changed about his body-mostly because he spent most of that 60 minutes doubled over with incredible stomach cramps. But the second those subsided he realized he had to pee and moments after that-

Well. He hadn't reacted well, in the slightest. There was screaming, and his first ever full transformation, involved. It was traumatic, even. Pops, after consulting with Whitey and Jozu, immediately set course for the North Blue to an island famous for it's medical advancements. They assumed, correctly, that this "White City" would be able to find answers to Marco's insanely weird new problem.

The tests were many, invasive, and took multiple hours a day-every day, for an entire month. Nearly the entire hospital staff they consulted with, plus several animal sanctuaries, got involved. In the end, Marco was left with a hard-to-process reality.

Gone was the previous anatomical features he was used to-that he had tied his identity to-and in the place of his dick and balls was. Just another hole. At first it was mortifying, embarrassing, and shameful. Half the jokes he used to tell were suddenly cruel jabs at himself. Half the conversation of the crew suddenly felt like an indictment of his lacking.

It took him nearly to his 30th birthday to come to a place of real acceptance. The process required the assistance of his family's steadfast refusal to think less of him, and several meetings with a very strange group of people calling themselves "the okama kingdom." Slowly, but surely, he figured it out. He got there.

Where before he hid every stormy emotion of the day underneath a relaxed veneer, now at the age of 40 he openly expressed how he felt. Happiness was all smiles, anger a downturn set of eyebrows with a frown, sadness was shown with tears, stress was a pair of hunched shoulders and tight lips.

Where before he envied other men for the ease in which they proclaimed themselves such, now Marco knew-just as surely as he had before his fruit-he was just as much "male" as they were. He didn't need a dick and external testicles to prove it-just his fists and the occasional flash of talon. No one had joked about his lack of balls in decades, but he knew that if the punchline came up he could roll with it easily.

Where before he would get angry enough to lash out, or scared enough to flat out hide, on his bad days where the alteration of his body bothered and unnerved him, Marco now instead could lean on his brothers and sisters among the crew. Izou happily kept his quarters unlocked for Marco's bad days, as did Thatch and Rakuyo and Jozu and Pops. Even Vista, and the more reserved Namur, gladly let Marco hang around in awkward silence when he knew he couldn't be alone with his thoughts.

His lack of sexual experience never bothered him before now. He figured out his own needs-what worked, what didn't, and the things in between-and then held himself back. He knew there were people out there who wouldn't be bothered by his body-in fact, if Shanks were any indication, there were likely people out there who'd be really into his body-but the difficulty in explaining things made him hesitate. Eventually he decided that tending to his own lust by himself was preferable to fumbling through awkwardness with a partner. Even the few times he genuinely thought finally taking the plunge with someone, something would hold him back. (A niggling, scared voice that reminded him of himself at 18 whispered how can you prove they won't brag, that they won't turn you into a joke once you're gone?)

Then along came Ace, incredible and bullheaded. And Ace brought with him something Marco didn't think he'd ever find. Ace with his fire and fiery personality. Ace with his whip-smart brain, with his incredible body, with his brighter-than-the-sun smile, with his flirty grins and heated looks. Ace brought hope.

(The voice would tell him Ace brought trouble.)

[aerodaltonimperial]

Woke up this morning already so overstimulated that the sound of my husband chewing nearly made me go ballistic, so it's gonna be one of those days (and my kid spent half of yesterday on TOP me because she "just wanted to", which is where I suspect all of this is stemming from).

[wild-at-mind]

I wonder if I could develop a fetish for being the sheltered loser kid who needs to be taught to live a little in a teen movie.

[this-is-a-podcast-fanblog]

damn im kind of realizing no one actually sees me as genderqueer. everyone just sees me as a kind of weird girl. not even a woman because im petite with pink hair everyone sees me as still a girl. and a few people actually use he/him for me but nobody actually sees me as genderqueer. hmm. dont like this feeling.

[boyslit]

just so we're fucking clear. i don't give a goddamn rat's ass what your position is on the anti/proshipping thing is. if it's got you making threats of violence against other real living people for no other reason than you disagree with how they engage with FICTION, i'm not fucking with you. catch yourself a shiny new block. and god, i hope you grow and learn better