#Internet Deals Cable Internet

[wirelesstek]

Buy Affordable Smartphones: Everything You Need to Know

 

In today’s fast-paced digital world, owning a smartphone has become a necessity rather than a luxury. Smartphones not only keep you connected but also serve as mini-computers, cameras, and entertainment hubs. However, finding the perfect Buy Affordable smartphones can be a daunting task. Let’s dive into everything you need to know about buying affordable smartphones while exploring related services and accessories that enhance your mobile experience.|Discover all you need to know about purchasing budget-friendly smartphones in the modern digital era. Smartphones are now essential tools that offer connectivity, as well as functioning as cameras, mini-computers, and entertainment devices. While finding the ideal affordable smartphone may seem challenging, we will guide you through the process and introduce you to various services and accessories that can enhance your mobile usage.

Navigating the World of Budget-Friendly Smartphones: A Comprehensive Guide

In our increasingly digital lives, smartphones have evolved from a to an essential tool. These versatile devices not only facilitate communication but also function as compact computers, cameras, and sources of entertainment. Despite their importance, discovering a high-quality smartphone at a budget-friendly price can be a challenging endeavor. This guide will walk you through the ins and outs of purchasing affordable smartphones, as to complementary services and accessories that can elevate your mobile experience.

Why Choose Affordable Smartphones?

Affordable smartphones are not just about saving money; they often provide incredible value for the price. These devices usually feature competitive specifications, durability, and access to the latest apps without breaking the bank. From entry-level models to mid-range options, the market is full of choices that cater to different needs and budgets.|What Makes Budget-Friendly Smartphones a Great Option smartphones offer more than just cost savings — they frequently deliver impressive performance and features at an affordable price point. Typically, these phones boast robust specs, long-lasting build quality, and access to the latest software and apps, all without a hefty price tag. Whether you’re advanced, the market offers a wide range of options to suit various needs and financial constraints.|What Makes Budget-Friendly Smartphones a Smart Choice? Budget-friendly smartphones offer more than just a low price tag; they frequently deliver impressive performance and features at an unbeatable cost. Typically, these devices boast impressive specs, rugged build quality, and seamless access to the latest apps, all without straining your finances. With a wide range of options available, from basic to mid-tier models, there’s a budget-friendly smartphone to suit every need and budget.

Budget-friendly pricing|Advantages of low-cost smartphones: Economical pricing|Advantages of Cost-Effective Smartphones: Economical pricing}

Good performance for daily tasks|Effective Handling of Everyday Responsibilities|Strong performance in everyday activities|Solid Execution for Everyday Responsibilities

Access to essential features like high-quality cameras and long-lasting batteries|Entry to important functions such as top-notch cameras and durable batteries|Enjoy key benefits including premium camera capabilities and extended battery|Enjoy key benefits including premium camera capabilities and extended battery life.

Pair Your Smartphone with the Best Internet Plan Deals

When buying a smartphone, it’s essential to pair it with an internet plan that matches your usage needs. Affordable smartphones shine when they’re paired with cost-effective and reliable Internet plan deals. These deals often include unlimited data, high-speed connectivity, and low-cost monthly charges. Be sure to shop around and compare plans from different providers to find the one that best suits your lifestyle.|Maximize Your Smartphone’s Potential with the Right Internet Package To get the most out of your new smartphone, it’s crucial to choose an internet plan that aligns with your online habits. Budget-friendly smartphones truly and dependable internet packages. of benefits, including unlimited data, fast connection speeds, and budget-friendly compare offers from various providers to find the perfect fit for your unique needs and lifestyle.

Tips for Finding the Best Internet Deals:

Look for bundles that include both mobile and home internet.|Strategies for Securing Top-Notch Internet Offers: Consider packages that combine mobile and residential internet services for a comprehensive solution.

Check for promotional offers that cater to new customers.|Look out for special deals designed for new clients.

Compare data caps, speeds, and coverage in your area.|Evaluate internet plans by examining data limits, connection speeds, and local availability.

Take Advantage of Phone Plans Promotions

Many mobile service providers offer Phone plans promotions to attract new customers or retain existing ones. These promotions can include discounted monthly rates, free upgrades, or bonus data. Combining a promotional phone plan with an affordable smartphone can result in significant savings over time.|Maximize Your Savings with Mobile Carrier Deals To draw in new subscribers and keep current ones, numerous wireless carriers offer special promotions on their phone plans. These limited-time offers can feature reduced monthly fees, complimentary upgrades, or extra data allowances. Pairing a promotional plan with a budget-friendly phone can lead to substantial cost savings}

Examples of Popular Promotions:

Discounted family plans|Promotional offers that are well-liked: Family plans with reduced prices

Seasonal offers with reduced pricing|”Exclusive Deals for a Limited Time Only: Discounts Inside

Trade-in bonuses for old devices|Get trade-in incentives for your outdated gadgets

Consider Pre-owned Devices: Pre-owned Laptops and Smartphones

If you’re looking to save even more, exploring the pre-owned market can be a great option. Pre-owned laptops and smartphones often come at a fraction of the cost of new devices while still offering excellent functionality. Many trusted retailers and online platforms perform rigorous testing and refurbishment to ensure the quality of these devices.|Explore Secondhand Electronics: Used Laptops and Smartphones For those seeking additional savings, delving into the secondhand market is a favorable choice. Secondhand laptops and smartphones are typically priced much lower than brand-new devices yet maintain high performance. Numerous reputable sellers and internet marketplaces conduct thorough inspections and repairs to guarantee the reliability of these electronics.}

Advantages of Buying Pre-owned: Eco-friendly choice by reducing electronic waste|Benefits of Purchasing Secondhand: Eco-conscious decision that helps reduce electronic waste.

Significant cost savings|Substantial reductions in expenses

Availability of high-end models at lower prices|Affordable luxury options for premium products.

Enhance Your Smartphone with Phone Repair Services

Affordable smartphones are an excellent choice, but like any device, they can encounter issues. When that happens, relying on professional phone repair services can save you money compared to replacing your device. From screen replacements to battery repairs, technicians can restore your smartphone to optimal condition quickly and affordably.|Elevate Your Mobile Device with Professional Phone Repair While budget-friendly smartphones are a great option, they are not immune to problems. In the event of malfunctions, seeking assistance from experts in phone repair can be a cost-effective alternative to purchasing a new device. Whether it’s fixing a cracked screen or replacing a faulty battery, skilled technicians can efficiently and inexpensively bring your smartphone back to its best state.

Common Phone Repairs: Cracked screen replacements|Typical Mobile Fixes: Screen Repair Services for Damaged Displays

Charging port fixes|Phone Charging Ports

Battery replacements|Replacing batteries}

Don’t Forget to Buy Phone Cables and Accessories Accessories play a crucial role in enhancing the functionality of your smartphone. When you buy phone cables, make sure they’re compatible with your device and support fast charging or data transfer. High-quality cables ensure your smartphone performs at its best while lasting longer.|Remember to purchase phone cables and accessories. Accessories are important for improving how well your smartphone works. When selecting phone cables, ensure they work with your device and can charge quickly or transfer data efficiently. Using high-quality cables will help your smartphone operate effectively and have a longer lifespan.

Popular Phone Accessories:

USB-C and Lightning cables|Common accessories for phones include USB-C and Lightning cords.

Fast chargers|Quick Power Boosters

Wireless charging pads|Chargers that enable wireless charging

Expand Your Storage: Buy Phone Storage Devices

Running out of storage is a common issue for smartphone users, especially those who love capturing photos, videos, and downloading apps. Investing in additional storage, such as memory cards or external drives, can solve this problem. When you buy phone storage devices, ensure they’re compatible with your smartphone and offer sufficient capacity.|Increase Your Storage Capacity: Purchase Storage Solutions for Your Phone Many smartphone users experience a frequent problem of running low on storage space, particularly individuals who enjoy taking photos, recording videos, and installing apps. Adding extra storage, like memory cards or external drives, can effectively address this issue. When selecting phone storage solutions, verify that they are compatible with your device and provide ample storage space.

Types of Phone Storage Devices: MicroSD cards|Options for Expanding Phone Memory: MicroSD Cards {External SSDs|Portable Solid State Drives.

Cloud storage subscriptions|Subscriptions for storing data in the cloud

Tips for Choosing the Right Smartphone

When shopping for an affordable smartphone, it’s crucial to consider your needs and prioritize features that matter most. Here are some tips to help you make the right choice:|the Ideal Smartphone on a Budget Finding the perfect affordable smartphone and a focus on. To ensure you make an informed decision, here are some valuable guidelines to keep in mind:

1. Set a Budget Determine how much you’re willing to spend and stick to it. Affordable smartphones typically range between $100 and $400, offering various features depending on the price point.|Establish a budget by deciding on the amount you are comfortable spending and then adhere to it. Affordable smartphones are usually priced between $100 and $400, providing different functionalities based on the price range.

2. Compare Specifications Focus on specifications like processor speed, RAM, storage capacity, and camera quality. Mid-range smartphones often provide excellent value with balanced performance.|When evaluating options, pay attention to key specs memory, storage space, and camera capabilities. Smartphones in the middle price range often offer a great balance of features and performance, making them a great value.

3. Read Reviews Check online reviews and ratings to understand the real-world performance of the smartphone you’re considering. Look for insights on durability, battery life, and software updates.|3. Review Feedback Be sure to read reviews and ratings on the internet to gain insight into how well the smartphone you are interested in actually performs in real life. Pay attention to information on its endurance, battery longevity, and software upgrades.

4. Look for Deals and Bundles Many retailers offer discounts or bundles that include accessories or services. Combining deals on smartphones with Internet plan deals or Phone plans promotions can maximize your savings.|4. and Packages Retailers often provide discounted bundles that include extras like accessories or services. Pairing smartphone deals plans or phone services can help you

Conclusion

Affordable smartphones are an excellent choice for anyone looking to save money without compromising on functionality. By pairing your device with the best Internet plan deals and taking advantage of Phone plans promotions, you can enjoy a seamless and cost-effective mobile experience. Additionally, don’t overlook the value of pre-owned laptops, phone repair services, and essential accessories like when you buy phone cables or buy phone storage devices. With the right approach, you can build a complete, budget-friendly setup that meets all your digital needs.|In summary, budget-friendly smartphones offer a great way to cut costs without sacrificing performance. By combining your device with affordable internet plans and taking advantage of phone plan discounts, you can enjoy a hassle-free and affordable mobile experience. Furthermore, consider the benefits of refurbished laptops, phone repair options, and essential add-ons like phone cables and storage devices to enhance your setup. With a little planning, you can create a comprehensive and affordable digital solution that meets all your needs.

Start your journey today and find the perfect affordable smartphone and accessories to stay connected and productive!|Embark on a new path now and discover the ideal budget-friendly phone and accessories that will keep you linked and efficient.

[whoslaurapalmer]

still have not heard back from The Government, debating calling them again but unsure if that is, Okay, but meanwhile!! I didn't call the pharmacy yesterday so I must call them. today. I can do that. I can so totally do thatttttttttt

[snoozaga]

Why are they playing YouTube "funny" videos from like 2006 on TV with hungarian commentary........

[merry-1009]

Unlocking the Best Internet Provider Deals: A Comprehensive Guide  

In today's digitally interconnected world, a reliable and high-speed internet connection isn't just a luxury; it's a necessity. Whether you're streaming your favorite shows, conducting business meetings, or gaming with friends, having a robust internet connection can make all the difference. However, with so many providers and packages available, finding the right one for your needs can be overwhelming. That's where Fastway Connect comes in – your trusted partner in navigating the sea of internet options to find the perfect fit for you.

  Why Choose Fastway Connect?  

At Fastway Connect, we understand that not all internet connections are created equal. That's why we've curated a selection of the best providers and packages to ensure that you get the high-speed internet you need at a price you can afford. Here's why you should choose us:

  1. Cheap Internet Deals:   We know that price matters. That's why we've scoured the market to find budget-friendly high-speed internet plans for under $50/month. With detailed insights on speed, data caps, and more, we'll help you find the best deal for your budget.

  2. Tailored Bundles:   Looking for a one-stop-shop for all your entertainment needs? Unlock tailored TV and fast internet bundles based on your location. Our top pick, the AT & T Standard + bundle, offers the ultimate package experience at an unbeatable price.

  3. Exclusive Perks:   At Fastway Connect, we believe that deals should be more than just promotions – they should be valuable savings over your service term. That's why we've partnered with top local internet providers to uncover exclusive perks that you won't find anywhere else.

  Compare and Contrast  

Not sure which provider is right for you? Our comprehensive comparison tool makes it easy to compare top-speed internet providers like AT&T, Optimum, and Spectrum. From budget-friendly options like Direct TV to multi-gig possibilities with Frontier and AT&T Fiber, we'll help you find the perfect fit for your needs.

  Internet Technology Explained  

Understanding the different types of internet technology can help you make an informed decision when choosing a provider. Here's a breakdown of the most common types:

-   5G Home Internet:   Utilizes cellphone towers to deliver high-speed internet directly to your home. Offers speeds up to 1,000 Mbps but consistency may vary based on proximity to a cell tower. -   Fiber:   The swiftest and most dependable option, boasting symmetrical download and upload speeds. Limited availability but offers multi-gigabit plans. -   Cable:   Widely accessible and highly reliable, with gigabit speeds. May experience slowdowns during peak usage periods. -   Fixed Wireless:   Offers reliable connectivity for rural regions without the latency issues of satellite options. Expect slower speeds and data caps. -   Satellite:   Spans all 50 states, offering reliable connectivity for rural areas but with higher latency and lower data allowances. -   DSL:   Utilizes telephone lines for data transmission, offering widespread availability and affordability but relatively lower speeds.

  Guidelines to Selecting Your Ideal Internet Provider  

Still not sure where to start? Follow these guidelines to help you make the right choice:

1.   Evaluate Your Speed Needs:   Take our speed test to gauge your current speed and determine if you require more or less. 2.   Consider Device Count and Usage:   Factor in the number of connected devices and your daily online activities. 3.   Assess Your Current Speed:   Test your existing internet speed and seek transparent pricing to understand the actual cost. 4.   Demystify Internet Terms:   Gain clarity on essential internet concepts to make informed decisions.

  Internet Provider FAQs  

Still have questions? Here are some frequently asked questions about Fastway Connect:

-   Does Fastway Connect provide internet services?   We don't directly offer internet services but link you with providers accessible in your area. -   Why do limited internet providers serve my area?   Limited options often result from the costly infrastructure needed, but we ensure access to top providers. -   Will there be new internet choices available in my vicinity?   With the rise of 5G and infrastructure investments, we're committed to bringing you cutting-edge options.

In conclusion, finding the best internet provider doesn't have to be complicated. With Fastway Connect, you can unlock exclusive deals, compare top providers, and find the perfect fit for your needs. Say goodbye to slow connections and hello to high-speed internet today!

[foone]

why are printers so hated? it's simple:

computers are good at computering. they are not good at the real world.

the biggest problems in computers, the ones that have had to change the most over the time they've existed, are the parts that deal with the real world. The keyboard, the mouse, the screen. every computer needs these, but they involve interacting with the real world. that's a problem. that's why they get replaced so much.

now, printers: printers have some of the most complex real-world interaction. they need to deposit ink on paper in 2 dimensions, and that results in at least three ways it can go on right from the start. (this is why 3D printers are just 2D printers that can go wrong in another whole dimension)

scanners fall into many of the same problems printers have, but fewer people have scanners, and they're not as cost-optimized. But they are nearly as annoying.

This is also why you can make a printer better by cutting down on the number of moving elements: laser printers are better than inkjets, because they only need to move in one dimension, and their ink is a powder, not a liquid. and the best-behaved printers of all are thermal printers: no ink and the head doesn't move. That's why every receipt printer is a thermal printer, because they need that shit to work all the time so they can sell shit. And thermal is the most reliable way to do that.

But yeah, cost-optimization is also a big part of why printers are such finicky unreliable bastards: you don't want to pay much for them. Who is excited for all the printing they're gonna be doing? basically nobody. But people get forced to have a printer because they gotta print something, for school or work or the government or whatever. So they want the cheapest thing that'll work. They're not shopping on features and functionality and design, they want something that costs barely anything, and can fucking PRINT. anything else is an optional bonus.

And here's the thing: there's a fundamental limit of how much you can optimize an inkjet printer, and we got near to it in like the late 90s. Every printer since then has just been a tad smaller, a tad faster, and added some gimmicks like printing from WIFI or bluetooth instead of needing to plug in a cable.

And that's the worst place to be in, for a computer component. The "I don't care how fancy it is, just give me one that works" zone. This is why you can buy a keyboard for 20$ and a mouse for 10$ and they both work plenty fine for 90% of users. They're objectively shit compared to the ones in the 60-150$ range, but do they work? yep. So that's what people get.

Printers fell into that zone long, long ago, when people stopped getting excited about "desktop publishing". So with printers shoved into the "make them as cheap as possible" zone, they have gotten exponentially shittier. Can you cut costs by 5$ a printer by making them jam more often? good. make them only last a couple years to save a buck or two per unit? absolutely. Can you make the printer cost 10$ less and make that back on the proprietary ink cartridges? oh, they've been doing that since Billy Clinton was in office.

It's the same place floppy disks were in in about 2000. CD-burners were not yet cheap enough, USB flash drives didn't exist yet (but were coming), modems weren't fast enough yet to copy stuff over the internet, superfloppies hadn't taken over like some hoped, and memory cards were too expensive and not everyone had a drive for them. So we still needed floppy disks, but at the same time this was a technology that hadn't changed in nearly 20 years. So people were tired of paying out the nose for them... the only solution? cut corners. I have floppy disks from 1984 that read perfectly, but a shrinkwrapped box of disks from 1999 will have over half the disks failed. They cut corners on the material quality, the QA process, the cleaning cloth inside the disk, everything they could. And the disks were shit as a result.

So, printers are in that particular note of the death-spiral where they've reached the point of "no one likes or cares about this technology, but it's still required so it's gone to shit". That's why they are so annoying, so unreliable, so fucking crap.

So, here's the good news:

You can still buy a better printer, and it will work far better. Laser printers still exist, and LED printers work the same way but even cheaper. They're still more expensive than inkjets (especially if you need color), but if you have to print stuff, they're a godsend. Way more reliable.

This is not a stable equilibrium. Printers cannot limp along in this terrible state forever. You know why I brought up floppy disk there? (besides the fact I'm a giant floppy disk nerd) because floppy disks GOT REPLACED. Have you used one this decade? CD-Rs and USB drives and internet sharing came along and ate the lunch of floppy disks, so much so that it's been over a decade since any more have been made. The same will happen to (inkjet) printers, eventually. This kind of clearly-broken situation cannot hold. It'll push people to go paperless, for companies to build cheaper alternatives to take over from the inkjets, or someone will come up with a new, more reliable printer based on some new technology that's now cheap enough to use in printers. Yeah, it sucks right now, but it can't last.

So, in conclusion: Printers suck, but this is both an innate problem caused by them having to deal with so much fucking Real World, and a local minimum of reliability that we're currently stuck in. Eventually we'll get out of this valley on the graph and printers will bother people a lot less.

Random fun facts about printing of the past and their local minimums:

in the hot metal type era, not only would the whole printing process expose you to lead, the most common method of printing text was the linotype, which could go wrong in a very fun way: if the next for a line wasn't properly justified (filling out the whole row), it could "squirt", and lead would escape through gaps in the type matrix. This would result in molten lead squirting out of the machine, possibly onto the operator. Anecdotally, linotype operators would sometimes recognize each other on the street because of the telltale spots on their forearms where they had white splotches where no hair grew, because they got bad lead burns. This type of printing remained in use until the 80s.

Another fun type of now-retired printers are drum printers, a type of line printer. These work something like a typewriter or dot-matrix printer, except the elements extend across the entire width of the paper. So instead of printing a character at time by smacking it into the paper, the whole line got smacked nearly at once. The problem is that if the paper jammed and the printer continued to try to print, that line of the paper would be repeatedly struck at high speed, creating a lot of heat. This worry created the now-infamous Linux error: "lp0 on fire". This was displayed when the error signals from a parallel printer didn't make sense... and it was a real worry. A high speed printer could definitely set the paper on fire, though this was rare.

So... one thing to be grateful about current shitty inkjet printers: they are very unlikely to burn anything, especially you.

(because before they could do that they'd have to work, at least a little, first, and that's very unlikely)

[revelboo]

Revel? It's been a bad day. I had an anxiety attack, and other shit happened today. Can I request some comfort oneshots for transformers dealing with their s/o being cyber bullied or something? Or maybe just comfy fluff? Gonna need it.

Sure! I’m so sorry that happened to you

Comfort

Astrotrain

• Stiffening as he enters his habsuite and finds you hurriedly turning away from him and rubbing at your eyes, he growls. No one’s allowed to upset you. Except him. “What’s with the leaking?” Reaching out to run a servo over the top of your head before hooking the tip under your chin to tip your face up. Those tears sliding down your face, the faint trembling of your hands make him feel violent. Who did this?

• “I’m okay. People are just jerks sometimes,” you mutter, still feeling the anxiety twisting inside you with no outlet. Hear him rumble out a growl as his servos close around you and you’re being lifted and cradled against the warm mesh of his neck, the thrum of his spark helping. ‘If you tell me about it, I’ll deal with it,’ he offers and you press your face against him with a laugh that’s more sob than anything else. Because you know he will. Love him for that, but you also know he’ll deal with it with excessive amounts of violence and siccing your giant boyfriend on some internet troll who’s probably just a lonely guy living in his mom’s basement wouldn’t exactly be fair as satisfying as it would be.

Bluestreak

• Door wings drooping as he returns to his habsuite and finds you huddled in your blankets wedged into a corner on his berth, your face crumples when you meet his optics before you’re hiding your face in the blanket. And his spark feels like it’s breaking. Are you crying? Anxiety thrumming through him, he puts a knee on the berth and mass shifts, crawling closer and stopping just short of touching you. “Hey, are you okay?”

• Hate this because you’re the strong one, the one always comforting and looking after him. But peeking out at his anxious expression, you cave and reach for him. Let him pull you into his arms and rest his chin on top of your head. “Better now,” you manage, not sure how to explain someone bullied you, too embarrassed to admit to it. But you feel better with his arms wrapped around you. Having this, having him to ground you.

Bayverse Optimus

• Startling as your skin prickles all over at the low snarl, you turn and he’s right there, optics narrowing as he takes in your anxious tears and then he’s reaching to carefully pick up your laptop in his huge servos to lift it closer to his face. That angry rumbling growing louder as his optics narrow. “Babe?” You whisper. Oh, that’s not good. Seeing his servo send a tiny cable to snake into the laptop.

• Venting on a growl as he searches and traces, he finds what he needs and disconnects from the device, carefully handing the tiny thing back to you before reaching out to touch the top of your head. Hating someone upset you, made his tiny mate cry. “I’ll deal with it,” he growls and your eyes widen. No one is allowed to harm you. Not without repercussions. Moving back and transforming, he’s rolling as you shriek after him not to murder anyone. Broken legs aren’t fatal to humans, right?

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Utah’s getting some of America’s best broadband

TOMORROW (May 17), I'm at the INTERNET ARCHIVE in SAN FRANCISCO to keynote the 10th anniversary of the AUTHORS ALLIANCE.

Residents of 21 cities in Utah have access to some of the fastest, most competitively priced broadband in the country, at speeds up to 10gb/s and prices as low as $75/month. It's uncapped, and the connections are symmetrical: perfect for uploading and downloading. And it's all thanks to the government.

This broadband service is, of course, delivered via fiber optic cable. Of course it is. Fiber is vastly superior to all other forms of broadband delivery, including satellites, but also cable and DSL. Fiber caps out at 100tb/s, while cable caps out at 50gb/s – that is, fiber is 1,000 times faster:

https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2019/10/why-fiber-vastly-superior-cable-and-5g

Despite the obvious superiority of fiber, America has been very slow to adopt it. Our monopolistic carriers act as though pulling fiber to our homes is an impossible challenge. All those wires that currently go to your house, from power-lines to copper phone-lines, are relics of a mysterious, fallen civilization and its long-lost arts. Apparently we could no more get a new wire to your house than we could build the pyramids using only hand-tools.

In a sense, the people who say we can't pull wires anymore are right: these are relics of a lost civilization. Specifically, electrification and later, universal telephone service was accomplished through massive federal grants under the New Deal – grants that were typically made to either local governments or non-profit co-operatives who got everyone in town connected to these essential modern utilities.

Today – thanks to decades of neoliberalism and its dogmatic insistence that governments can't do anything and shouldn't try, lest they break the fragile equilibrium of the market – we have lost much of the public capacity that our grandparents took for granted. But in the isolated pockets where this capacity lives on, amazing things happen.

Since 2015, residents of Jackson County, KY – one of the poorest counties in America – have enjoyed some of the country's fastest, cheapest, most reliable broadband. The desperately poor Appalachian county is home to a rural telephone co-op, which grew out of its rural electrification co-op, and it used a combination of federal grants and local capacity to bring fiber to every home in the county, traversing dangerous mountain passes with a mule named "Ole Bub" to reach the most remote homes. The result was an immediately economic uplift for the community, and in the longer term, the county had reliable and effective broadband during the covid lockdowns:

https://www.newyorker.com/tech/annals-of-technology/the-one-traffic-light-town-with-some-of-the-fastest-internet-in-the-us

Contrast this with places where the private sector has the only say over who gets broadband, at what speed, and at what price. America is full of broadband deserts – deserts that strand our poorest people. Even in the hearts of our largest densest cities, whole neighborhoods can't get any broadband. You won't be surprised to learn that these are the neighborhoods that were historically redlined, and that the people who live in them are Black and brown, and also live with some of the highest levels of pollution and its attendant sicknesses:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/06/10/flicc/#digital-divide

These places are not set up for success under the best of circumstances, and during the lockdowns, they suffered terribly. You think your kid found it hard to go to Zoom school? Imagine what life was like for kids who attended remote learning while sitting on the baking tarmac in a Taco Bell parking lot, using its free wifi:

https://www.wsws.org/en/articles/2020/09/02/elem-s02.html

ISPs loathe competition. They divide up the country into exclusive territories like the Pope dividing up the "new world" and do not trouble one another by trying to sell to customers outside of "their" turf. When Frontier – one of the worst of America's terrible ISPs – went bankrupt, we got to see their books, and we learned two important facts:

The company booked one million customers who had no alternative as an asset, because they would pay more for slower broadband, and Frontier could save a fortune by skipping maintenance, and charging these customers for broadband even through multi-day outages; and

Frontier knew that it could make a billion dollars in profit over a decade by investing in fiber build-out, but it chose not to, because stock analysts will downrank any carrier that made capital investments that took more than five years to mature. Because Frontier's execs were paid primarily in stock, they chose to strand their customers with aging copper connections and to leave a billion dollars sitting on the table, so that their personal net worth didn't suffer a temporary downturn:

https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2020/04/frontiers-bankruptcy-reveals-cynical-choice-deny-profitable-fiber-millions

ISPs maintain the weirdest position: that a) only the private sector can deliver broadband effectively, but b) to do so, they'll need massive, unsupervised, no-strings-attached government handouts. For years, America went along with this improbable scheme, which is why Trump's FCC chairman Ajit Pai gave the carriers $45 billion in public funds to string slow, 19th-century-style copper lines across rural America:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/02/27/all-broadband-politics-are-local/

Now, this is obviously untrue, and people keep figuring out that publicly provisioned broadband is the only way for America to get the same standard of broadband connectivity that our cousins in other high-income nations enjoy. In order to thwart the public's will, the cable and telco lobbyists joined ALEC, the far-right, corporatist lobbying shop, and drafted "model legislation" banning cities and counties from providing broadband, even in places the carriers chose not to serve:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/03/19/culture-war-bullshit-stole-your-broadband/

Red states across America adopted these rules, and legislators sold this to their base by saying that this was just "keeping the government out of their internet" (even as every carrier relied on an exclusive, government-granted territorial charter, often with massive government subsidies).

ALEC didn't target red states exclusively because they had pliable, bribable conservative lawmakers. Red states trend rural, and rural places are the most likely sites for public fiber. Partly, that's because low-density areas are harder to make a business case for, but also because these are also the places that got electricity and telephone through New Deal co-ops, which are often still in place.

Just about the only places in America where people like their internet service are the 450+ small towns where the local government provides fiber. These places vote solidly Republican, and it was their beloved conservative lawmakers whom ALEC targeted to enact laws banning their equally beloved fiber – keep voting for Christmas, turkeys, and see where it gets you:

https://communitynets.org/content/community-network-map

But spare a little sympathy for the conservative movement here. The fact that reality has a pronounced leftist bias must be really frustrating for the ideological project of insisting that anything the market can't provide is literally impossible.

Which brings me back to Utah, a red state with a Republican governor and legislature, and a national leader in passing unconstitutional, unhinged, unworkable legislation as part of an elaborate culture war kabuki:

https://www.npr.org/2023/03/24/1165975112/utah-passes-an-age-verification-law-for-anyone-using-social-media

For more than two decades, a coalition of 21 cities in Utah have been building out municipal fiber. The consortium calls itself UTOPIA: "Utah Telecommunication Open Infrastructure Agency":

https://www.utopiafiber.com/faqs/

UTOPIA pursues a hybrid model: they run "open access" fiber and then let anyone offer service over it. This can deliver the best of both worlds: publicly provisioned, blazing-fast fiber to your home, but with service provided by your choice of competing carriers. That means that if Moms for Liberty captures you local government, you're not captive to their ideas about what sites your ISP should block.

As Karl Bode writes for Techdirt, Utahns in UTOPIA regions have their choice of 18 carriers, and competition has driven down prices and increased speeds. Want uncapped 1gb fiber? That's $75/month. Want 10gb fiber? That's $150:

https://www.techdirt.com/2024/05/15/utah-locals-are-getting-cheap-10-gbps-fiber-thanks-to-local-governments/

UTOPIA's path to glory wasn't an easy one. The dismal telco monopolists Qwest and Lumen sued to put them out of business, delaying the rollout by years:

https://www.deseret.com/2005/7/22/19903471/utopia-responds-to-qwest-lawsuit/

UTOPIA has been profitable and self-sustaining for over 15 years and shows no sign of slowing. But 17 states still ban any attempt at this.

Keeping up such an obviously bad policy requires a steady stream of distractions and lies. The "government broadband doesn't work" lie has worn thin, so we've gotten a string of new lies about wireless service, insisting that fiber is obviated by point-to-point microwave relays, or 5g, or satellite service.

There's plenty of places where these services make sense. You're not going to be able to use fiber in a moving car, so yeah, you're going to want 5g (and those 5g towers are going to need to be connected to each other with fiber). Microwave relay service can fill the gap until fiber can be brought in, and it's great for temporary sites (especially in places where it doesn't rain, because rain, clouds, leaves and other obstructions are deadly for microwave relays). Satellite can make sense for an RV or a boat or remote scientific station.

But wireless services are orders of magnitude slower than fiber. With satellite service, you share your bandwidth with an entire region or even a state. If there's only a couple of users in your satellite's footprint, you might get great service, but when your carrier adds a thousand more customers, your connection is sliced into a thousand pieces.

That's also true for everyone sharing your fiber trunk, but the difference is that your fiber trunk supports speeds that are tens of thousands of times faster than the maximum speeds we can put through freespace electromagnetic spectrum. If we need more fiber capacity, we can just fish a new strand of fiber through the conduit. And while you can increase the capacity of wireless by increasing your power and bandwidth, at a certain point you start pump so much EM into the air that birds start falling out of the sky.

Every wireless device in a region shares the same electromagnetic spectrum, and we are only issued one such spectrum per universe. Each strand of fiber, by contrast, has its own little pocket universe, containing a subset of that spectrum.

Despite all its disadvantages, satellite broadband has one distinct advantage, at least from an investor's perspective: it can be monopolized. Just as we only have one electromagnetic spectrum, we also only have one sky, and the satellite density needed to sustain a colorably fast broadband speed pushes the limit of that shared sky:

https://spacenews.com/starlink-vs-the-astronomers/

Private investors love monopoly telecoms providers, because, like pre-bankruptcy Frontier, they are too big to care. Back in 2021, Altice – the fourth-largest cable operator in America – announced that it was slashing its broadband speeds, to be "in line with other ISPs":

https://pluralistic.net/2021/06/27/immortan-altice/#broadband-is-a-human-right

In other words: "We've figured out that our competitors are so much worse than we are that we are deliberately degrading our service because we know you will still pay us the same for less."

This is why corporate shills and pro-monopolists prefer satellite to municipal fiber. Sure, it's orders of magnitude slower than fiber. Sure, it costs subscribers far more. Sure, it's less reliable. But boy oh boy is it profitable.

The thing is, reality has a pronounced leftist bias. No amount of market magic will conjure up new electromagnetic spectra that will allow satellite to attain parity with fiber. Physics hates Starlink.

Yeah, I'm talking about Starlink. Of course I am. Elon Musk basically claims that his business genius can triumph over physics itself.

That's not the only vast, impersonal, implacable force that Musk claims he can best with his incredible reality-distortion field. Musk also claims that he can somehow add so many cars to the road that he will end traffic – in other words, he will best geometry too:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/10/09/herbies-revenge/#100-billion-here-100-billion-there-pretty-soon-youre-talking-real-money

Geometry hates Tesla, and physics hates Starlink. Reality has a leftist bias. The future is fiber, and public transit. These are both vastly preferable, more efficient, safer, more reliable and more plausible than satellite and private vehicles. Their only disadvantage is that they fail to give an easily gulled, thin-skinned compulsive liar more power over billions of people. That's a disadvantage I can live with.

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/05/16/symmetrical-10gb-for-119/#utopia

Image: 4028mdk09 (modified) https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Rote_LED_Fiberglasleuchte.JPG

CC BY-SA 3.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en

[ceasarslegion]

OK...I'm asking....

Yay!

So this happened in what I consider the worst job I ever had. And that is saying something because I very much worked retail in a mall. I had just graduated uni, I couldn't afford toronto anymore, and I needed a full-time job to make ends meet now that the stability of university was gone. So I went to edmonton because I had one family member I could stay with until I got on my feet. And I was not in a position to turn away a job that paid.

So I took a door to door sales position. For telus. I can hear the canadians in the room wincing so to everyone else: telus is one of the three whole mega megacorporations that control the ENTIRE canadian telecommunications network. And all three of those companies are buddy buddy and have us all by the balls. That's why canadian phone plans are the most expensive in the world. Not in the developed world: in the WORLD.

The meth lab incident happened on my 3rd whole day on my own. I was in St. Albert, which is this suburb of edmonton that is like if a kale smoothie and that guy who won't shut up about bikhram yoga had a baby they abandoned in an HOA meeting. Which is what makes this that much more unhinged: it was in the most cookie cutter suburbia part of the EMR.

So I was doing my knocks in my blue Jay's hat and my telus branded polo shirt with my clipboard and I knock on my next door. I'm greeted by a middle aged woman who proceeds to dump on me that she's divorcing her husband of 30 years and moving to New Brunswick. I'm like okay cool I just wanna sell you cable packages, good luck with that?

I write that off and continue along the cul de sac until I knock on this other lady's door. And when I say talkative I mean a real chatty Kathy. She practically grabs me by the collar and plops me down on her deck chairs, shoves a coffee in my hand, and says "HEY TELUS GUY DID YOU KNOCK ON METH GUYS DOOR???" And points to the house of the lady who just told me she was getting a divorce

At this point I have forgotten about my commission. I have forgotten about my shitty supervisor and how every part of this job sucks and how I wanna go back to Toronto. I have thrown away my clipboard I have started sipping her coffee that could very well be spiked with something and I go "you have to tell me about the meth guy"

That house I knocked on? The weird oversharing lady who was getting a divorce? Her husband was running a meth lab out of the basement THEIR ENTIRE MARRIAGE and she ONLY FOUND OUT THEN?? He called it his man cave and said that she wasn't allowed in?? And then one day she went down out of curiosity and it was a METH LAB??? All the bonuses he said he got at work were meth money.

I'm still enamored by how this happened. Did it not smell? Like for those who don't know edmonton there is a HUGE meth problem here. Like across the political aisle we all agree that something has to happen about all the meth, the details get foggy and that's where people argue, but needless to say I have smelled and been offered meth before just by virtue of living downtown. That shit REEKS. Like you know meth smell because it somehow smells like the word "meth." You will know what you are smelling even when you've never smelled it before. And it lingers. It hangs. It gets into walls. I know when I've taken a train car before because the smell of that guy who hotboxed it with meth smoke last week will still kinda be there. There's no way that house didn't smell like ass down to the foundation.

And the "you arent allowed in my man cave" excuse... im enamored by both the sexism towards his OWN WIFE and the way she just... went along with it for 30 years? Never set foot down there? The sexism and the just believing it?

I kept trying to steer the conversation back to the meth lab and this lady I was on the porch of kept actively trying to buy internet deals from me. Like she was the only person I ever pitched who was TRYING to get my bundles. I ended up just handing her my list of products and told her to check off what she wanted and was like "more meth lab?" And she went right to "yknow i think if I was your age I would've been a boy now. We didn't really have those terms when I was a kid" I DID NOT BRING THAT UP MA'AM I DONT HAVE TIME FOR YOUR GENDER CRISIS TELL ME MORE ABOUT THE METH LAB

That job was so shit that that was the only one I ever quit with no back up plan and did not regret for a second. I then went to the mall and handed out CVs and got my retail job by the end of the week from doing that.

[katsona-the-katsequel]

Specialized Extracurricular Execution Squad Activity Report

Part 1

(As I mentioned before, all of this was retrieved and translated from the P3 Club Book)

4/6 (Mon) - Reporter: Mitsuru Kirijo

It's Kirijo...

Today is April 6th... No, it's already past midnight. So, to be precise, it's the early hours of the 7th. A new member has arrived at Iwatodai dorm. He is a boy who seems a little quiet, but exudes a mysterious air about him.

Yes, to use a cliché phrase, he has that kind of aura that makes you feel like there is something shining there.

The Chairman had told us about his "potential" beforehand, but to be able to walk the whole way from the station to the dormitory without getting flustered during the Dark Hour... Marvelous! I'm really surprised!

It seems that he has not yet Awakened, but I am sure that he will be a great asset to our team. Today may be a fateful day for us.

Hehe... I seem to be in a surprisingly good mood. Let's hope that my hunch is correct and that I'll finally be able to put an end to my sadness of the past 10 years.

4/7 (Tue) - Reporter: Yukari Takeba

Well, it's Takeba. There are no club activities today. Oh, I guess escorting the transfer student who arrived last night to school this morning counted as part of the activities. He is, to put it nicely, "calm and collected," but from my perspective, he's way more than cool, and I don't know what he's thinking... well, you shouldn't say anything bad without knowing the facts.

Also, that idiot Junpei Iori from my class is getting a little too close to the new transfer student, so I made sure to tell him not to mention the Dark Hour thing. That's it. This is Takeba.

4/8 (Wed) - Reporter: Akihiko Sanada

Following on from last night, I was on a shadow patrol again tonight. The patrol area was the main street from Iwatodai Station to Moonlight Bridge.

Since the beginning of this month, there have been more and more rumors about shadows, but contrary to expectations, there are not many of them. To be honest, it's not enough.

I guess we have no choice but to build up our fighting power as soon as possible and begin our assault on that dreaded tower, Tartarus. They'll be gathering there. It should be a more efficient way to proceed with our operations than patrolling in the hopes of a chance encounter. Well, now is the time to lie low...

Ah, that's right. Tonight I found an unexpected find. A detailed report will be provided at a later date.

It's unclear whether it will be an effective fighting force, but it looks like it could be interesting in many ways.

Oh, and a message from Takeba to Ikutsuki-san: "It's embarrassing, so please stop the indiscriminate attacks of puns."

4/9 (Thu) - Reporter: Mitsuru Kirijo

It's Kirijo. During the Dark Hour, we were attacked by a large Shadow unlike any we had seen before.

The Arcana was the Fool.

For more details, please see the attached report.

…Today's report may be a little too brief, but due to a series of shocking events, I'll have to be forgiven.

Above all, he is a newbie... He seems to be a little out of control, but he awakened to two Persona at the same time.

What if...

Anyway, the confusion on this matter has subsided.

I will provide a written report as soon as possible.

Oh, and there was some damage to the exterior walls and windows of the dormitory, but the overall damage seems to be minor. We plan to place an order for repairs with a contractor from our group as early as tomorrow.

4/10 (Fri) - Reporter: Akihiko Sanada

The damage caused by the large Shadow last night was greater than expected. Mitsuru said it wasn't a big deal, but it was a big burden on Takeba, as it was her first real fight. She's probably not going to be able to use her Evoker for a few days, especially due to mental fatigue.

The damage to the dormitory itself was even worse than it appeared, with several optical fiber cables for the internet broken.

Also, the newbie collapsed after the battle and remains unconscious. It seems that the cause was excessive mental concentration in order to control his Persona, but it is unclear when he will return.

It's true... I can't help it. I'll fight for anyone who can't fight for themselves... Hey, Mitsuru, what's with you all of a sudden... Whoa, wait a second...

(Some loud bang sound)

...Additional information from Kirijo. Akihiko has been diagnosed with a broken rib and will need one month to fully recover. For the time being, the Specialized Extracurricular Execution Squad will be effectively suspended.

...Correction: Akihiko has suffered a head injury. An additional half month will be added to the time until he is fully recovered. That's all.

4/11 (Sat) - Reporter: Yukari Takeba

Uh, this is Takeba.

Dark Hour activities will be suspended for a while, but today I went to visit our new member, so I thought I'd let you know.

He's still unconscious, but the doctor said he's in good health.

From what I saw, his complexion was good and he had regained consciousness.

I think he might have gained weight from all the infusions. I'm a little worried, so I'll go and check on him again tomorrow at noon.

Maybe he will be cured completely.

4/12 (Sun) - Reporter: Yukari Takeba

Well, it's Takeba for the second day in a row.

Kirijo-senpai is out today, having gone to the Kirijo Group headquarters to report on the recent large Shadow incident. Sanada-senpai was about to go out for some personal training when he was spotted by Kirijo-senpai, who gave him a cold shoulder... well, not metaphorically, but more like, physically.

Oh, and I believe Ikutsuki must be feeling lonely without a supervisor...to be honest, it's painful. I hope the new guy returns as soon as possible. That's all from Takeba. Phew.

4/13 (Mon) - Reporter: Akihiko Sanada

As for the cleanup of the large shadow from the other day, it seems that it has finally come to an end, according to Mitsuru's report yesterday.

The rest is up to the Chairman and the specialist team. We just need to focus on defeating the shadows. That being said, we are currently overwhelmingly underpowered... Anyways, patience makes perfect, so we'll just have to be patient for a while.

That's right. Today at school, the Student Council election was held. Mitsuru was running for president, and it seems likely that she will win. The results will be announced at tomorrow's morning assembly, but should I start thinking about what to say to congratulate her?

4/14 (Tue) - Reporter: Mitsuru Kirijo

It's Kirijo.

There is nothing to report from the Specialized Extracurricular Execution Squad today. The new recruit hasn't regained consciousness yet. I wonder if he'll be okay...

Also, I apologize for talking about my personal matters, but as a result of the Student Council elections held yesterday, I have been officially appointed as student council president, starting today.

Let me report on it.

I have a lot of things to do this week to take over the Student Council. However, I am confident that I can achieve good results by utilizing the experience I gained as a Student Council member from my first year.

I hope that with this, I can be more confident in defeating shadows as well...

No... that's not it. That's not it. Why would I have confidence in the Student Council, in school life? My life may not be in danger, but the future can't be perfect either...

I may have been... a bit complacent.

I'm grateful for this activity report. Just having to say it out loud and record it is a lot easier than thinking alone.

It teaches you things that you would not notice on your own.

Thinking about it, I've always been told that I'm taking on too much on my own. Akihiko often lectures me about this.

Well, I'll make sure to keep this in mind when I deliver my inaugural address next week.

4/15 (Wed) - Reporter: Yukari Takeba

Uh, this is Takeba.

Today is a day off for the Archery Club, so I went to Tatsumi Memorial Hospital again. …He is still unconscious, so I'm starting to get worried.

The other day, I was asked to read a report about his upbringing, and I did, but it was pretty sad that he doesn't have any family to help him if something happens.

It's pretty tough without someone...

I really hope he gets better soon.

That's all from Takeba.

Oh, that's right. I forgot to mention it, but congratulations to Kirijo-senpai on being appointed president.

4/16 (Thu) - Reporter: Shuji Ikutsuki

…This is Ikutsuki.

It seems like everyone in SEES has been pushing themselves too hard lately, so I've decided to let them go to bed early tonight. There's nothing of note to report regarding shadows.

It's really nerve-wracking to record in front of a microphone in this empty space.

I was so nervous that I had to go to the bathroom...

When recording, that is, when inputting sound, going to the toilet is inevitable, just kidding...

Ah, if no one listens to me, it's not worth it.

4/17 (Fri) - Reporter: Yukari Takeba

It's Takeba! Well, he's finally woken up! According to the doctor in charge, he's in good health. He'll still be staying in the hospital tonight just to be safe, but starting tomorrow, he'll be fine to go to school.

Also, the Chairman said that he will finally tell him about SEES tomorrow.

I'm a little worried about whether he'll understand SEES' activities because he's a bit shy. Well, I can't force him, so it can't be helped, but if he joins, I think he'll be very reliable. I'll try not to get my hopes up too much and wait for tomorrow. This is Takeba.

4/18 (Sat) - Reporter: Mitsuru Kirijo

Good news! The new guy has been officially accepted into SEES.

…Honestly, even though it was an accident, I put him in a life-threatening situation, so I thought it was inevitable that he would refuse, but he seems to have a more flexible way of thinking than I had imagined. I can expect him to be an even more valuable asset in the future.

Oh, and by the way... I may have been a little too strict during the recruitment meeting. Sorry, Akihiko.

However, I need you to act a little like an injured person and exercise more restraint.

I don't want anyone to be forced to miss out...any more than this.

4/19 (Sun) - Reporter: Akihiko Sanada

The new recruit I picked up during the recent Dark Hour, whose situation had been left unresolved due to the large Shadow attack incident, is finally being allowed to move into the dorms.

The new recruit's name is Junpei Iori.

His detailed information should have been submitted separately, but he was in the same class as Takeba and the transfer student.

I had planned to keep it a secret until the last minute and surprise him, but Takeba's reaction when he moved into the dorm was better than I expected, and it was quite fun. If he continues like that, I think he'll fit in with the group quickly and do well.

He has a unique talent for creating a good mood, and in a sense, this is an advantage that surpasses his Persona abilities.

He has a unique talent for creating a good mood, and in my opinion, this is an advantage that surpasses his Persona abilities. Maybe I should follow his example.

And... finally, starting tomorrow, we plan to begin our search for Tartarus. Unfortunately, it seems Mitsuru won't allow me to join in, but even so... it's finally here...

4/20 (Mon) - Reporter: Yukari Takeba

Uh, this is Takeba.

Today was my first time in Tartarus...and I'm kind of tired from all sorts of things...

But I'll try my best.

No, I think I can do my best.

The field leader, the transfer student, is amazing. I have my own goals, but I don't really know much about them.

I know I shouldn't rely on him, but it still seems like he could be relied on.

Now... if only we could do something about Junpei's stupidity, it would be fantastic.

Well, it's short, but I'm going to sleep now. This is Takeba.

4/21 (Tue) - Reporter: Junpei Iori

…Ah, ah...Is the sound properly? Ahem.

Hey, I'm Junpei Iori, a promising new recruit. Well, this is my first report. ...What should I talk about? The activities that seem to be part of SEES are, ah, I was told by Sanada-senpai to go to the Tatsumi East Police Station with the transfer student to buy weapons.

But if you think about it, that's just black market sales, isn't it? Is that okay?

I heard something on TV, but the number of Lost people, shadow victims, is increasing.

Well, that's where we come in... but it's hard to get used to the Evoker.

I don't think it's right. Isn't it possible to make it a more gentle design?

And then... Oh, by the way, Kirijo-senpai's inaugural speech as president was really powerful. I didn't really understand it though.

Is that it? Yes, it's all over.

SEES Members Talk!

Mitsuru: In addition to directing the daily attack on Tartarus, he is also involved in student council activities... right, he is also in the sports club.

Fuuka: Although he doesn't go every day, he participates in the same cultural club as me. The club president seems to think highly of him.

Yukari: So what was it called, that club thing... you do that too, right? Come to think of it, it's a really hard schedule.

Mitsuru: Even when he comes to school, he sometimes looks pretty pale. I wonder if he is tired after all. I am worried because he never complains or anything...

Yukari: Sometimes he falls asleep during class so soundly that his eyes roll up, or he goes to Mr. Edogawa's after school.

Fuuka: That's right, and then he takes this very suspicious drug that seems to emit smoke, and looks so happy... It's actually kind of scary how he becomes so refreshed so quickly.

Mitsuru: Sometimes during the Dark Hour he mutters to himself something like "The end is coming..." ...Could it be that he's in quite the dangerous situation...?

Yukari: ...

Fuuka: H-how can I cheer her up? Oh, that's right, how about equipping her with high leg armor and sexy heels!

Mitsuru: Wh...! Yamagishi, don't be so casual about it as if it's someone else's problem.

NEXT->

[velvetwyrme]

sorry for like. constantly sending you stuff about funny 'bugs' khjgjfhdglhjkg but!! idea for skylynx and the other Ridiculously Large Fellows

THEY'RE OLD! I think their species would've evolved back in the carboniferous, when there was much much more oxygen in the air, which allowed insects like Meganeura (dragonfly the size of an eagle) to evolve due to how insect respiratory systems work! Then they just sorta. stuck around, evolving a new way to breathe after the oxygen went way down again.

as for how skylyx splits, i think it's a temporary 'in case of emergency break glass' kind of deal. Splits in half to escape predation, though if the two parts remain split for too long they'll just. die anyway. I don't think they do that much at all in the present time, since they are still pretty damn big. They're smart scavengers, and I think they'd be treated like a crow or raccoon. smart and big but harmless if you treat them well. They WILL ear your internet cables and power lines tho.

also I think they're pretty distantly related to all cybugs other than the mechanimal/dinobot looking ones. they're living fossils and are more like ancestor species than anything. Like if Archeopteryx was still alive with our modern day birds.

AUUAUIFHGH <33 this is so so so cool hell YES

so immensely delighted by this. look at that funny ancient raccoon bug living fossil. the splitting mechanism as a means to escape predation is so neat??? i don't have much else to add here because just!!! YES. YEAH YEAH YEAHHAHHSGHG?!?!?

[calaisreno]

Under the Weather

There are days when everything goes wrong. I don't mind, as long as you're with me.

1731 words / Prompt: Weather

When John pushes the door open, he’s hit with a Baltic blast of air from within. This is surprising; it’s a cold day, but generally 221B is a bit warmer than outdoors. 

“What’s going on?” he asks the bundle of blankets on the sofa. 

“Not much,” Sherlock replies. “Lestrade called with a case. I solved it over the phone.”

John lets out a sigh; it becomes a small, vaporous cloud. “I mean, why is it so cold in here?”

“The temperature outdoors is minus seven degrees. In here, it is four degrees above zero. Eleven degrees warmer. You ought to be asking me, why is it so warm in here?”

“I mean,” John says, keeping his jacket buttoned and sinking into his chair, “Why is it bloody four degrees inside our flat?”

“Oh. Why didn’t you say that? The boiler’s broken.”

“Have you rung someone?”

The blanket bundle sighs. “Mrs Hudson is away, visiting her sister.” He’s using his patient voice, which means that John is going to have to shout if he wants an explanation. “I don’t know how to fix a boiler, and there’s no service tag on it, so I don’t know who to call.”

“You might have looked in the phone book. They do list people who fix boilers, you know.”

Sherlock waves a hand dismissively. The hand is wearing a purple mitten, which probably came from Mrs Hudson’s knitting basket. “This is 2010. Who uses phone books these days?”

“Maybe the internet knows who fixes boilers?”

Sherlock wags mittened hands at him. “Fingers frozen. Can’t type.”

“And all day you’ve been waiting here for me to come home and save you from freezing to death?”

The pile of blankets mumbles. 

“What?”

“I said, you’re better at dealing with boilers.”

“It doesn’t take a genius to call someone to fix a boiler, Sherlock.”

“Exactly.” A pair of grey eyes and a pink nose peep out of the blankets. “The electricity still works. Can you make tea? That might thaw my fingers.”

Cursing softly to himself, John fills the kettle. At least the pipes haven’t frozen, though that might be next. He sets it on the base, and flicks it on. The light remains unlit. “What did you do to the kettle?”

“Oh, erm. Why do you ask?”

“It’s not working.”

“It is a very old kettle. They don’t last forever, you know.”

“Oi!” He holds up the base. “Why is the cord no longer connected to the base?”

More mumbling. He catches the word experiment and something about microwave not working either…

Cursing a bit louder, John opens his laptop and searches for someone who will repair a boiler. He casts an evil look at the sofa as he dials the first one he finds. 

A minute later he ends the call. “It’s after hours,” he announces. “And the weekend is just starting. I left a message.”

He tries three more numbers, then five more, leaving increasingly desperate messages. 

For a moment he sits, eyes closed, and contemplates the long, cold weekend that lies ahead. Maybe the telly works, at least. He takes the remote and presses the power button. 

“Cable’s out too,” Sherlock’s voice says. He still in his blanket pod, but knows John well enough to anticipate his thought process. “Ice on the lines.”

“Well,” John says. It’s all fine for Sherlock, who is in a cocoon, unaffected by the weather inside the flat. “I’ll be upstairs putting on my arctic gear.”

“I’ll call for takeaway,” Sherlock says.

John’s room is even colder than downstairs. This is mainly because water has been leaking through a hole in his ceiling. The hole is a surprise, an unhappy one. Not big enough to see sky, but enough to let water in. This morning, before it started to rain and the temperature began to drop, followed by ice and snow, the ceiling was intact. His room was nice and warm—and dry. 

There’s no way he can blame Sherlock for the age of the roof, the weather’s bad timing, or the bad luck that hovers over John like a small, dark cloud.

He curses loudly as he opens drawers, hunting for his long johns and wool socks. Finding them, he sits on the bed and curses again as water soaks into his pants.

“Bloody buggering hell! What did I do to deserve this!” 

The fates have no answer for this.

Finally, having discarded his wet pants, donned his long johns, wool socks, a pair of corduroy trousers that fit over the long johns, a polo neck pullover, and the warmest jumper in his drawer, he heads down the stairs, cursing at a volume loud enough for the other resident of the flat to hear.

The sitting room is silent, the lump on the sofa unmoving. 

“There’s a hole in the roof!” he announces. “My bed is soaked through.”

“We could make a fire in the hearth,” Sherlock suggests. He’s poking his head out now, looking like a curly-headed turtle. 

“By we, I assume you mean me.” John grabs the blanket off the back of his chair and wraps it around his shoulders before sinking into the chair. “Do we have any firewood?”

“A relevant question.”

“Look, I won’t mind burning some of your books if it’ll keep me warm.”

“My books are valuable. You might try burning some of those idiotic spy novels you read. But there’s some firewood downstairs, by the back door. I’m sure Mrs Hudson won’t mind us using it. Better than coming home and finding our stiff, dead corpses—”

“Let’s not talk about corpses right now.” Not while I’m thinking about killing you. “Did you order some food, I hope?”

“Angelo’s is closed, due to weather. I ordered Chinese.”

 “Thank god.” John leans back in his chair. Every muscle in his back is tight from a very long day, and he’s shivering hard, wishing for a cup of tea. 

He hears movement from the sofa and opens his eyes. Sherlock stands, shedding his blankets. He’s dressed in a pair of John’s tracksuit bottoms, John’s Christmas jumper, and wool socks that look suspiciously like they came out of John’s sock drawer. 

He’s glaring down at John with concern (if such a thing is possible). “Stop shivering.”

“Involuntary response,” he replies, teeth chattering. “That’s my jumper you’re wearing.”

“I didn’t have anything warm enough.”

“You made fun of that jumper at our Christmas drinks thing.”

“Well, it’s more appropriate now, isn’t it?” He arranges one of his blankets around John, tucking him into his chair. Then he strides out the door. 

When he returns with a bundle of firewood, John is reflecting that there won’t even be hot water. No bath to warm him up. Just Chinese food and blankets.

The fire is looking somewhat robust by the time the doorbell rings. 

The Chinese food helps, though it’s been in transit long enough that it’s not very hot. Sherlock apologises for the tea kettle. And the microwave. When they’ve eaten, he collects the empty cartons and takes the leftovers into the kitchen. 

“Fridge still works,” he calls out. “Just warning you, though. It will probably stop when the indoor temperature drops below freezing.”

“Look on the bright side,” John replies. “We’ll be stiff, dead, corpses by then. Beyond caring about milk for the tea we can’t make.”

Sherlock comes back with a bottle and two glasses. “Here’s something to warm us up.”

He hands John a glass and pours. “Happy anniversary, John.”

John laughs. “Right. One year living at 221B. I didn’t expect you’d care about things like that.”

“Why not? One year is the longest I’ve managed to cohabit with anyone. It’s been… good.” He sits down, his face pink in the firelight.

“It has been good,” John admits. He remembers the first time he came through the door, saw Sherlock’s clutter, and wondered what he was getting himself into. He remembers carefully probing, trying to determine whether Sherlock might be interested…

Well, nothing ever goes to plan. That’s the story of John’s life.

He leans back, all the weariness of the day dragging his eyelids down. 

“John, wake up.”

“Mm?” He sighs and opens his eyes. 

Sherlock is standing over him. “You can’t sleep in your chair. In the morning your neck will hurt.”

“True, but my bed has become an ice floe.”

“Sleep in my bed.”

“What? Oh, you’ll take the sofa.”

Sherlock shakes his head. “Self-preservation, John. Body heat.”

“What are you talking about?”

“We must sleep together.”

“Together?”

“It’s the only way.”

“You want to sleep with me?”

“Science, John. If your core temperature drops too low, you die. And all the firewood is gone, so we have to improvise.”

Improvise, indeed. The bedroom is colder than the sitting room, but the bed is large and, more importantly, not a frozen slab of ice. Keeping their clothes on, they crawl under the covers and move towards one another. Sherlock’s arms go around him, and John lays his head against Sherlock’s chest. 

It feels like something they do all the time. Or something they should have done months ago. 

John shivers a bit, not from the cold. Sherlock smells like kung pao chicken and expensive scotch. 

“Skin-to-skin might be warmer,” Sherlock says. “We shouldn’t take chances.”

John giggles. “Is the boiler really broken?”

“Of course. Did you think I was only trying to get you into my bed?”

“Sherlock.” He feels Sherlock’s nose with his own. It’s like an icicle. “You could have had me in your bed a long time ago, if that’s what you wanted.”

Sherlock is silent. He buries his face in John’s shoulder. “Really?”

“I didn’t think you wanted that.”

“Neither did I.”

“Do you?”

“Everything went wrong today,” he whispers. “And then you came home.”

“This was an especially bad day.” John snuggles into him. “The surgery was full of snotty kids and over-protective parents. Nothing interesting, just mucus and vomit. I didn’t get any lunch. The bus was late. And when I came home, it was freezing. But you were here.”

“John.”

“Hm?”

“I don’t mind all the things that are wrong, as long as you’re with me.”

“Not that I want more misery, but…” John kisses his nose. “You’re the one I want to share it with.”

Sherlock kisses John’s nose, then his lips, lingering. “Let’s get these clothes off before we freeze to death.”

[pinazee]

First season wrap up:

Okay, to start, i should mention my general opinion on first seasons for shows, especially cable shows, is not to read too much of it as canon. The writers, producers, actors- everyone- are all trying to figure out what works and what doesn’t, so i give them latitude, particularly when it conflicts with later seasons. That being said, i do enjoy jumping through the hoops to make it all fit haha

So heres a few leftover notes i had as i revisited the eps to rank them:

I bet part of Lassie was craving the father figure in Henry, since we find out later his own father passed away when he was quite young. I wonder if thats part of the reason why he became a cop, as they are portrayed as the protectors and in the 80’s they were mainly men (i don’t really remember if he states his reason later, i suspect he did and im just not remembering). So when Henry didn’t meet up to the expectation he had in his mind, i bet it hurt a little more as it reminded him of what he lost :/

I think the other reason Shawn plays dumb so much, besides hiding his genius so ppl believe hes psychic, or for laughs, is because its how he gets people talking. Like in Shawn vs. the red phantom, he purposely guessed the wrong room number so the boys would correct him. My apologies if someones pointed this out before, i haven’t combed through the internet for everyone’s theories 😬 i only now noticed. I’m not the quickest at picking these things up lol

If i had to guess, Shawn didn’t want to be a cop for halloween, he probably wanted to be something star wars related to go with Gus’s Lando. So i wonder at what age Shawn stopped trying to please his dad. But also, why didn’t his mother ever stand up for him?? I’ll come back to her later -_-

I somehow missed it the first time, but shawn clearly asked Gus to come to the dinner and Gus even points out that it was a big deal for henry to reach out. Soo, yeah, shawn obviously didn’t wanna be alone with his dad, and even henry seemed nervous about it as hes pretty drunk.

Shawn has a right to be afraid of pointy things, his dad hid his easter eggs under glass when he was 6! Not to mention he later gets stabbed 3 times! (Also its just a legitimate fear???)

So far the list of Shawns knowledge (things i wouldn’t expect an average person to know) includes (beyond the obvious observational skills, deductive reasoning, reading people (poker), and all things police (marksmanship, police codes, etc.)):

Incredible spatial and physical reasoning skills (knowing how much money could fit in the duffle bag, knowing to rotate the water pitcher to catch the reflection from the tv)

Kurt Vonnegut (well, I didn’t know who he was at least)

How to spell aggiornamento (and probably all words because of his photographic memory)

Handwriting expert

Casually spoke and understood german

Has every road he’s driven mapped in his brain, and likely all of Santa Barbara

Familiar with paint (enough to know to mix latex enamel for no messy drips)

Animal tracks (i went back and forth on this but ultimately decided he must have known what to look for)

And heres a list of Gus’s niche interests:

Forensics

Spelling bee

Safe cracking

Historic rifles

Comic books

Astronomy (even though he was going to the planetarium for the girl)

Law

Local tennis

Online poker

Lastly, Ive decided instead of ranking them, im putting them in tiers. I feel like too many of them are hitting at the same level and I can’t differentiate:

Sweetest, Juiciest Golden Pineapple Tier

Scary Sherry, Biancas toast (ohmygod i just got the biancas toast 🤦🏽‍♀️)

Blue Psych Logo Tier

Weekend warriors

Forget me not

From the earth to starbucks

Poker? I hardly know her! (Sorry @pineapple-psychic!)

Pepto Bismo Pink Tier

Spelling bee

Pilot

She loves me, she loves me not, she loves me oops hes dead

Who ya gonna call?

Shawn vs the red phantom

Oops Canadian Flag Tier

Cloudy with a chance of murder

9 lives

Game set muuurder

Speak now or forever hold your piece

Woman seeking dead husband, smokers okay, no pets

[bwoahtastic]

Robot Oscar!!!!

Max can't help but take Oscar in but now he is legally Oscar's owner and sure Max is an experienced cat owner but he has never had to care for an android! Max awkwardly hoovering around Oscar asking if he has a usb-c or lightning charging port and Oscar dryly tells him he has a power down mode in which he charges, nothing to be inserted thank you very much!

Also can you imagine professional yapper and know it all Max dealing with Oscar? Max's self-defense in awkward times is spewing cat or geography facts but Oscar literally is the Internet he knows more and always just nods solemnly.

Max waking up one night to not only find the cats curled up on the bed with him, but Oscar too (they form a chaotic trio there to manipulate him, Max is 90% sure Oscar speaks cat but Oscar is denying it) curled up real small so he wouldn't wake Max. Max manhandling Oscar under the covers next to him claiming that he is sure it will help Oscar charge better and Oscar smiles softly and says he thinks so too, he is pretty sure he read an article on it (liesssss!!)

SCREAMING

Vibing with Max basically going "I'm a great cat dad how hard can it be caring for a robot" and Oscar is just silently judging him lol. Max going over with charging cables trying to figure out where the charging port would be and Oscar stops that real fast lol. Oscar explaining his low power mode, kinda between sleeping and meditating and he will power up through that, and Max just blurts out that's great cos electricity prices are so high now as if he isnt mega rich

Oscar thinks it's very amusing ehen Max seems to want to fill any awkward silence with just straight up yapping and Oscar does love to correct Max when he is wrong lol! The only things he doesn't know more on than Max is basically human emotion and habits and it fascinates him, so Max often has Oscar wandering after him to see what he is doing (they gotta talk about boundaries when Max is in the shower and suddenly hears "isn't bar soap better than liquid body wash? According to a study by-" and let's out a screech seeing Oscsr fully clothed in the shower next to him)

Pls Oscar and the cats just vibing a lot and Max is a little jealous when both cats curl up on Oscar's lap instead of his (he says it's cheating hearing Oscar upped his body temp a little because they like the warmth), but Oscar seems excited so it's fine.

Max waking up to 2 cats and 1 android sleeping a the end of his bed and he is groggy and confused but pulls Oscar over to be more comfortable. Oscar might be able to deal with the awkward angle but Max's muscles ache just looking st it so he isnt having his robot be uncomfortable! He mutters it's so Oscar can recharge better and Oscar hums, agreeing thst he read about that too (first lie Oscar ever told anyone).

(He much later also claims he heard that a kiss could help androids recharge faster and innocently asks if Max could help him test that theory)

[xsweetcatastrophe]

You Broke Me First

Part 30

"There she is," Cillian said one Zoe answered his facetime. He chuckled at her appearance. "Everything okay?"

Zoe's hair was in a messy bun atop her head, with fly-aways sticking out every which way. She had an old gray college t-shirt with the arms cut off, and a pair of workout shorts. She was sweating profusely and face was red.

"I'm over here making this house a home!" She said, right before Scout started barking. "Scout, stop!"

"Everything okay?" Cillian said, eyebrow raised. Scout was usually very well behaved, and never gave him a problem. Sure, when he was a puppy he got into things out of sheer curiosity, but never bit, never barked, never attacked, just a good, good boy.

"Well, your neighbors have dogs that are out for walks 3 times a day. I took Scout out and met one of them, I tried to be friendly and make conversation, but then realized it wasn't the home owner or the dog owner; it was the assistant to the owner. Then asked who I worked for as if I was an assistant," Zoe mumbed.

Cillian laughed. "I'm sorry Bunny. I hope you're not offended."

"I'm not, but it was the second time that happened today."

"What you mean?"

"When I signed for the couch, I asked how I should sign since the signature line had your name. He said I can sign my name because he 'deals with assistants all the time'. I guess I give off assistant energy instead of girlfriend energy"

"Fuck that. You're not a Hannah that's for damn sure."

you got that right.

Before Zoe could respond to that comment, Cillian spoke first.

"Show me what got delivered today."

Zoe flipped the camera around and showed the couch, end tables and coffee table that were assembled and arranged in the living rom. The TV was mounted over the fireplace and the rug was rolled out on the floor, ends still curling up because it was still so new.

"Cable and internet is coming later this afternoon, I'm starting to unpack the kitchen. Do you care where plates and cups go? Any cabinet preference?"

"Uh, no, no preference," Cillian chuckled. "Thanks babe. I owe you. I don't know what I would of done without you."

"You don't owe me, it's fine."

"Well I appreciate your help. I was stressed when all this was sprung upon me. the divorce came fast, the house came fast, then I had to up and leave for work," Cillian sighed, running his hand through his short hair.

"I'm here to make your life easier," Zoe smiled.

"What can I do to make your life easier?"

"Nothing. I'm fine."

Cillian smiled. There was about 10 seconds of silence, Zoe thought Cillian was frozen.

"Hello?" Zoe said, wondering if he had a bad connection.

"Why do you do that?" Cillian finally spoke.

"What do you mean?"

"Deflect. Avoid talking about hard things. Or anything ,actually, that's on your mind. You love to make sure i'm okay, pick apart my brain, find out what makes me tick and make everything okay in my head, but you don't let anyone in. You don't talk about anything that's bothering you."

"It's easier helping other people, and besides I don't need help, I got it."

"I got it" Cillian mimicked, raising his voice an octave or two to sound like her. "You know we're a partnership, right? If you want to help me, I gotta help you. This isn't gonna work if you keep closing me off-"

"Woah, take it easy" Zoe interrupted. "Where is this coming from?"

Cillian sighed. "I want to do this right. but I can't do it without you putting in an effort too. I try to talk to you about serious stuff and you're quick to shut me down. Especially with me being over here, I want to do everything in my power to make this as easy as possible and you keep just saying 'it's fine, it's fine' and I feel like it's all falling on me, or you just don't care. It almost feels isolating because am I going crazy, is this not what it seems, am I -"

"Cillian, you're spiraling." Zoe interrupted. "Jesus. I thought you were just calling to see the couches."

Cillian sighed. "See, you think i'm calling because I just want to see the couches. I'm calling because I want to talk to you. Because I miss you. Because I wish I could jump through the phone and be with you. Fuck the couches."

Zoe plopped down on the said couch in defeat. "Okay," she said. "I'm sorry. I guess I'm new to all of this."

"I'm sorry too. I didn't mean to jump down your throat. I'm just tired, jet lagged, I hate my hair, I feel helpless with all you're doing at home, I want to come home" Cillian rattled off.

"How can I make this easier for you?" Zoe said.

"I just..." Cillian started. "I really want this to work. Me and you."

Zoe smiled. "You and me, remember?"

"How do you feel about us and me being here?"

"Wow, this is deep for 2pm," Zoe said, well aware she was, once again, deflecting.

"Yea well, it's 10pm here, and I'm on edge, my anxiety is through the roof, so we're doing this now."

"Okay, okay.... How do I feel about us and you being there....." Zoe started.

Cillian had a point. Zoe always avoided hard conversations. There have been plenty of times in the past where she spilled her heart out to a guy, and the guy either laughed at her or didn't take her seriously. Years and years of getting hurt will make you closed off. For a long time, she felt it was better off this way. Who could hurt her if she didn't let anyone close enough to? Her mother, maybe. But she moved to the other side of the coast to avoid that.

But Cillian... was different.

"I love every moment with you. I find myself missing you the second you leave, so you being over there so far for so long has me scared."

Cillian smiled, happy she opened up a teeny bit. He could work with this.

"Scared? Of what?"

"That you'll slowly forget about me. Out of sight, out of mind. You're surrounded by beautiful women, it's easy to get distracted, I'm easily forgotten-"

"Zoe," Cillian warned. She was doing it again, putting herself down.

"Sorry. I'm just... you know that saying, 'out of sight, out of mind?' It's true. In my mind, I already prepared how this could go if it goes south. We talk every day for the first couple of days, then its every other day, then it's once a week, then it just... fizzles out."

"Well," Cillian started. "You're never out of my mind, so get that out of your head. So you're worried communication will die down between us, and that's what will end us?"

"It happens," Zoe shrugged. "I'm never really a priority in relationships, and even if I am, it doesn't last long."

"What if I have Hannah send over my shooting schedule to you every week, and then we can arrange facetimes every day? That way it's a set time and it's not left for you to wonder when i'll be free. And, of course, regular texts in between."

Zoe smiled. "That would help. I'm sure Hannah will be thrilled"

"I don't care about her," Cillian replied. "I care about us. I care about YOU. I need you to believe me and trust me that you are my priority, and that when all this is done, I'm coming home to YOU. Do you understand?"

Zoe's heart skipped a beat. Something about the way Cillian was talking, she believed him. She was scared to open herself up again, she was scared to trust him, but ....

"Okay," Zoe smiled. "I believe you. I trust you. I miss you. I want this to work as much as you do. I'm sorry that I don't show that enough."

Cillian smiled. "You show me in different ways. You may not say it, but when you were triple checking my packing list on the day I left, or the way you buy me that special brand tea that you can only get on the side of town to keep a box at your apartment for when I'm there, or always making sure I have pickle juice out when you pop popcorn because you know I like to pour it on top... You may not always say I love you, but you say it in different ways."

"That pickle and popcorn shit is disgusting." Zoe said, monotone.

"Don't knock it till you try it."

Zoe rolled her eyes.

"Okay, I'll have Hannah send over the schedule tomorrow morning. I think I'm done filming at 8pm tomorrow, so noon your time. I'll confirm."

"Okay."

"I need to get some sleep. I love you, Zoe. Me and you."

"You and me. I love you too."

They hung up and Zoe sighed.

She was nervous, but felt relieved. This could work. She loved him, she wants to try for HIM. For the sake of their relationship. It's time Zoe was happy for once.

She was about to close her eyes when the doorbell rang. The cable and internet people were here early. Scout went crazy over the doorbell, and Zoe groaned.

"Back to work."

______________________________________________________________

Halfway across the world, Cillian groaned as his alarm went off at 7am.

It was the first day of shooting, and Cillian wasn't feeling his best.

He was slightly irritated, if he would of known he was starting to film so early he would of flown out earlier to adjust to the jet lag. Everything now felt rushed and he was groggy and tired.

He opened his phone and shot a quick text to Zoe, letting her know he was awake and showering and he would text her when he got to set and when he was putting his phone away.

He jumped in the shower, making the water colder than normal, hoping it would help wake him up. Once he got out, he got dressed in a t-shirt and sweatpants, and as he was brushing his teeth there was a knock on the door.

"Good morning!" Hannah said cheerily, walking into the room. "I have your tea here, and your wardrobe for the day will be in the trailer on set. Are you ready to go?"

Cillian, although annoyed to see Hannah and her bubbly spirit so early in the morning, was thankful for the tea.

Cillian went back to the bathroom to finish brushing his teeth, then grabbed the tea and took a sip.

"Thank you," He said.

"Anytime, I suggest we head out. I have your schedule here-"

"Oh, hey, I have a job for you if you don't mind."

"Of course!"

"Every week, email the shooting schedule to Zoe."

"Why?" Hannah said, her voice no longer bubbly.

"Because we're figuring out times to talk to each other and squeeze video calls in, so I want her to have a copy of the schedule. I know you have her email, can you just do that for me, please?" Cillian asked nicely. He was not in the mood for an argument right now.

Hannah wanted to scream. But, she painted a smile on her face. "Sure. no problem. I'll get right on that," She replied, the last part sounding a little too sarcastic for her liking. It was 100000% sarcasm to her, but she couldn't let Cillian know that.

Her phone buzzed, interrupting her train of thought. "Driver is outside. Ready?"

Cillian slipped on his shoes and jacket and they both made their way downstairs, into the waiting car.

Once they arrived on set, Cillian headed to his trailer where he was met with the hair stylist, having to trim his sides since his hair started to grow back.

Once the hair was done and he was in his required wardrobe for the day, he headed out to the first scene. Halfway there, he stopped short.

"Shit, I still have my phone," He mumbled. He was already running a little behind schedule, and the thought of having to walk back to the trailer stressed him out.

"I can hold onto it for you" Hannah said, smiling. "I know it's no phones allowed and I see you more than you getting to go back to your trailer, I can just hold it for you."

"Yea? You don't mind?"

Hannah smiled. "Of course not."

"Thanks, Hannah," Cillian said. "You're a lifesaver. Don't forget that schedule to Zoe, please?"

"Don't you worry Cill," Hannah said, watching him walk to set. "I'll take care of everything," She looked down at the phone, praying he didn't a passcode on it.

He did. Shit.

She tried his birthday. It didn't work. She tried just his year, didn't work. She had to be careful, she knew if she entered too many incorrect passwords the phone would lock her out. What else could there be?

"hmmm...there's no way...." Hannah said to herself, trying the simplest combination: 11111.

phone unlocked.

Hannah smiled. "Men" She scoffed.

She now had access to Cillian's calendar, phone calls, emails... and text messages.

"Don't worry, Cillian," Hannah said out loud, hovering over Zoe's contact, containing her phone number and email address. "I'll get .. some sort... of schedule over to Zoe. Don't you worry."

tags: @lau219 @borntodiemp3 @cillianmurphyvevo @shopgirl6us

[mrvelocipede]

Everything is distracting chaos around here, and likely to stay that way until the holidays are over. I've hastily uploaded the snake cable pattern to Ravelry, and am probably going to disappear from the internet until visiting relatives have gone back home. If I have time, though, I'll see if I can wade through the storefront interface enough to figure out how to enable a discount code of some sort.

The flaming sword probably won't go up until after the new year, and I'm planning to do some kind of deal if you buy them both at once. So you may want to hold off on buying this thing for now.

[nicetryfed]

Writers' Guild Presents Case X-20080801 St. Beryl’s Investigation - Chapter 8 of 8 (Part 1 of The Tadfield Files Complete)

Chapter 8- Far Beyond Their Understanding

From the beginning

"Yeah, fine. All right." He huffed and snapped his fingers. A sleek black laptop appeared on the counter.

"What are you doing?" Aziraphale asked.

Crowley plopped down next to him with the laptop on his, well, lap. "Looking him up. I think he's going to keep breathing down our necks, blessing or not, so I want to know what kind of nosy bastard we're dealing with."

"How are you going to connect to the Internet? I don't have one of those fat phone cables, and I certainly do not have wiffy."

Crowley scrunched his face in utter confusion. "Connect?"

The laptop knew better than to give Crowley a "Network Connectivity Issues" error, as evidenced by the fully functioning web browser.

"See? It's fine."

"Are you going to Googly him?"

Crowley snorted. "Angel, please. Demons, we don't need Google. We have our own way, our own network of truly hellish backchannels. Darker than the dark web."

Aziraphale looked over his shoulder and read the address bar. "AltaVista.com?"

@goodomensafterdark