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zhongrin · 1 year

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cium aku dong?

◇ characters ◇ zhongli, childe, wanderer, cyno, al haitham, tighnari, xiao, ayato, diluc, kaeya, kazuha, kaveh, thoma, dottore, pantalone

◇ tags ◇ fluff, domestic, established relationship, kisses. LOTS of kisses (duh), slight angst (kaeya i'm so sorry), slight suggestiveness on some, slight possessiveness on some

◇ a/n ◇ [en] “kiss me please?” aka the ways they ask for a kiss <3 uh? what... what do you mean i clearly have favorites? i-i don't..... *nervous sweating* ANYWAY. merry xmas yall!! we all deserve fluff this holiday season so enjoy <3

𝑚𝑎𝑠𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑙𝑖𝑠𝑡 ⬙ 𝑡𝑎𝑔𝑙𝑖𝑠𝑡

“can i have my special tea?”

“darling, may i?”

zhongli is a natural at pulling you in for a kiss; most of the time he doesn’t expect you to kiss back, but he would be over the moon if you do.

you’re passing each other in the hallway of your house? he just leans towards you to place a fleeting kiss on your shoulder. you’re doing something and he passes behind you? he leans over to place a kiss on the top of your head and goes off his way. you sit beside him and plop your head on his shoulder? he smiles and scratches your scalp and places a sweet kiss on your forehead.

unfortunately (for you), on some occasions when he’s feeling a little playful, he might become a little tease; kissing you everywhere but your lips until you protest. to which he’ll chuckle fondly before finally giving in, pressing a soft fleeting kiss that promises you more when the curtains close for the day.

“kiss meeeeeeeee!!!!”

“[name]…. who was that person....?”

childe is a master of surprise kisses! he makes use of his skill to erase his presence to sneak up on you when you’re relaxing, before suddenly tackling you into a hug and kissing you all over your face.

when he’s in the mood for kisses, he becomes a ravenous kissing monster who can only be satiated after at least fifty proper kisses. or perhaps a few rounds of long, drawn-out make-out sessions.

just don’t deny him of his kisses because then he’ll brood and it’ll be his poor subordinates who get the burnt of his frustration. and if you get gifts on your doorstep with a recruit insignia badge, you probably should storm your boyfriend’s office before he actually kills someone.

“what? what’s that look for? heh, if you wanted a kiss you could’ve just asked. i~diot.” *cue the heart-piercing, soul-ascending blep*

“hey. come here.”

wanderer is either endlessly taunting you for the whole day, or being very blunt (while blushing furiously) as he motions you to come over. there’s no in-between.

you either kiss him, which will result in a smug smirk and perhaps a haughty ‘hmph, knew you can’t get enough of me’. or you just don’t… which means you’ve indirectly signed an agreement for him to be a total brat™️ for the day until he’s satisfied.

ohhh how unfortunate, your favorite scarf is blown away by the wind. ooooh, seems like it’s raining and there’s no shelter, too bad you don’t have a hat that can function as an umbrella. ooooo, what’s that? you want a hug?

ha.

in. your. dreams.

and yet when you kiss him he melts into you within 0.001 seconds.

“[name], did you know? sloths never kiss on the first date…… they take it slow.”

“can i… hold you? just for a bit?”

when the kiss puns start to drop left right and center, you know it’s cyno’s way to ask for a kiss.

... the man uses his jokes to get people to be less way of them instead of saying it out loud, what did you expect?

he might not realize it, but he stares at you especially hard on these occasions. if it were others, they would have feared for your life, but you know this is cyno’s version of the infamous wet puppy eyes. personally, you think it’s very adorable because it’s so very him, so you can’t help but pretend you don't understand just to tease him more.

the population thinks you must be some kind of a beast tamer in your past life, seeing as how the general mahamatra always faithfully follows behind you and always back down as soon as your touch descends upon him.

“you’re here. come sit. now kiss me.”

“i need to kiss you so you can testify to kaveh that i am, in fact, not an amateur when it comes to kissing. it would also be good if you can rate your satisfaction on a scale of one to ten- [name], where are you going?”

at the early stages of your relationship, al haitham isn't as insufferable; he takes what he gets, and he’s taking the time to get used to the idea of how he practically has the right to kiss you now.

but when that realization fully, truly sinks in?

oh boy.

he’ll be blunt, straight to the point, and unashamed. he might be blushing the first few times when he asked for your permission for a kiss. but seeing how much you got into it, hearing the breathless way you whisper his name, and witnessing the dopey smile after he’s done with you…

aha. eureka. it appears his expertise extends to kissing too. but of course, he is, as the youngsters these days say, ‘built different’, after all.

so why would he shy away from the activity?

now come kiss him.

“did you know that fennec foxes go through withdrawals when they don’t receive at least ten kisses per day? it’s true, i have conducted extensive research on it. with me as the research subject, of course, so i know the result is 99.99% reliable.”

“there, i gave you headpats. now will you give me kisses?”

always so dramatic and sassy. tighnari loves seeing the embarrassed look that crosses your face and the adorable giggles that escapes you whenever he tries to initiate the activity.

the fox hybrid likes to pat your head and lean forward so you can press a thank you kiss to his face. he doesn’t even mind where your kiss will land.

nose? kinda ticklish, but that’s very cute of you. cheek? adorable, why thank you. lips? hmmm… do that again.

“……….. what? i-i wasn’t staring!”

“[name], just a moment…. stay still.”

please just save xiao the embarrassment and kiss him regularly.

although your boyfriend might not look like he enjoys affection, he actually does. he’s just… not used to it and has no idea how to react, much less initiate physical affection. it’s something that he needs a lot of time to get used to, especially with his condition and background.

your protector yaksha is always so gentle when he asks for your loving touches - and most of the time he doesn’t even dare to ask - but the signs are there. you’ll really have to squint your eyes and tilt your head and maybe do a handstand before you realize ‘oh he wants a kiss’.

just. cuddle and kiss him darn it.

“my, what a fine morning, don’t you agree, sweetheart? it would be even more perfect if i had a morning kiss from my lovely partner, don’t you think?”

“there you are. lock the door for me, darling. now, why don't you make yourself comfortable?”

teasing words here and there, his hand touching your arm more than usual, him stopping when you pass each other in the hallway to make some insignificant small talk even though he’s clearly hurrying to a meeting…

yeah, your overworked man is in dire need of some loving.

if you give in and pull ayato for a quick kiss, he will skip over to his next appointment with a permanent smile. once again, you’ve saved the day of everyone in kamisato estate. great work, you! pat yourself on the back because you deserved it!

but continue to ignore him and you might find yourself being called to his office just to sit on his lap for hours (which, trust me, it gets boring after a while) without kisses or any sort of affection whatsoever... so pick your actions carefully.

“i know i should be working. but i wanted to… take a break.”

“love, your lips… n-no. it's just that. um. they look dry. here, use my chapstick.”

diluc? taking a break from work??

that diluc???

either he is very sick, or he is very much starved for your love. kindly think back on your day and check when was the last time you gave him a proper kiss, please.

what's that? you gave him a forehead kiss this morning to wake him up? oh. i’m sorry to say this but that’s just not enough. how dare you starve this man for four hours with no kisses. no wonder he’s unable to focus on his documents. please fulfill his lovesick daydream by barging into his office and distracting him from work with your wonderful, soft lips….

... please?

“work? mmm…. unfortunately my battery is near-empty… o kind, beautiful soul, would you help this poor man back to his feet?”

“hello my love, i came by because your lips look lonely.”

kaeya is very obviously a teasing flirt when he’s needy or bored. mostly he adores the embarrassed look on your face; he thinks it's very adorable and endearing. it's a sight he wishes to treasure and forever imprint in his mind, to peruse when doubt and darker thoughts attack him at night.

but let me tell you a secret.

yank his stupid coat and pull him into a kiss before he can use that sultry voice to tease you. kabedon him when you have the chance to, while you’re at it. watch the cavalry captain become putty in your hands. you’re welcome <3

“my dove, would you be so kind to quench this wandering man’s thirst for your sweet kisses?”

“it’s rather windy today… there you go, all set. ah, it's okay, i'm not cold. oh, i forgot. just one more thing- *kiss*…. hehe, i can see that you’re warming up already.”

longing looks and poetic words. kazuha kisses you like it’s a stray wind brushing gently on your lips, light and dreamy and leaving you wanting for more. his ruby eyes will droop with affection as you whine and pull him back for more contact. well, who is he to reject your generous invitation?

soon enough one peck becomes two, two becomes three, and then it turns into a soft makeout session and- oh is that beidou yelling at you both to get a room? haha, it seems like it’s time to change locations…

“[name] look, i finished the blueprint for our dream house! huh? oh, yeah this is the… what, fifth blueprint? well, i can’t help it! we should have at least seven houses in all seven nations- eh? t-the mora? uhhhhh…”

“i need… i need inspiration… my muse… i need my muse…”

you know it’s bad bad when kaveh trudges onto your side like a zombie that’s been out running after people’s brains for far too long.

he slumps onto you completely (good luck supporting a claymore user) and basks in your presence, arms wound tight on your middle section. it seems like you’ve deprived him of kisses for far too long. he’ll recover faster if you hug him back and run your fingers through his silky locks. when he pulls back slightly to pout at you, and you place a sweet kiss on his lips, it’s like you’ve flipped a switch.

the legendary architect's eyes widen and his downturned lips flip upside down. he kisses you back with vigor and runs back to his drawing room shouting about some new calculations and other kind of materials he could use. what a dork.

“[name]….” *insert the most adorable, heart-wrenching, chest-squeezing, wet puppy eyes here*

“i’ll be going now. have a good day, okay? i love you!”

like a faithful shiba inu, thoma beams and stares at you expectantly near the front door of your shared residence, waiting for that kiss you never fail to give him every single time he’s about to head out to work in the mornings.

will you ignore him and risk getting ayaka to visit you because ‘thoma seems very sad and distracted today, did you have a fight? why don’t you talk it out, i know you both treasure each other', or will you be an angel and make him start his day with the loveliest gift you can bestow your loyal lover?

“based on the monitoring data of your hormones over the past few hours, it seems that you’re in need of kisses. what? me, lying? making up facts? listen to me. who’s the doctor in this relationship?”

“it appears another segment of mine has been granted the privilege of a kiss, so i demand equal treatment.”

sure, doc. hormones screaming for a kiss. will experience lethargy for the rest of the day if not fulfilled. immediate treatment is preferred as he does not want to be stuck with a grumpy, needy lover for the rest of the day, blah blah blah-

look. i'll translate for you.

he wants a kiss. dottore wants a kiss. just give the mad doctor a kiss.

huh? which segment do you give a kiss to?

….. it seems like all of them want a kiss. you know, just to be fair.

good luck.

“good day, darling. i see that you’re wearing the necklace i bought you yesterday. you look ravishing indeed.”

“come here, love. i won’t ask twice.”

with every compliment directed your way and with every piece of new jewels added to your collections, pantalone expects you to give back some sort of affection. naturally. everything is a give-and-take, no? he provides you with all the luxuries and convenience a normal civilian can only dream of, and you provide him with what he asks for.

he’s not even asking for much - just don’t look at other men, focus on him and his needs, and pull him into a kiss every fifteen minutes. it's not hard of a task at all. surely you can fulfill it? otherwise, perhaps some disciplinary sessions are in order...

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a-dauntless-daffodil · 3 months

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Spear baby: (is crying/being fussy)

Vaggie: (0:35-0:43) https://youtu.be/10oPGM2_ZAc?si=udKrX2fwrUDpP14O

Vaggie: (rocking baby) "Rock. Rock. Rock. Maternal gesture."

Husk: "Woof."

Cherri Bomb: "Yikes."

Niffty: (gleeful) "I'm in paaaaain!"

Vaggie: (annoyed) "What?"

Angel Dust: "'s not an incantation or magical girl attack move, Vaggie van Gay, ya can't just say Maternal Gesture! an' expect the kid to absorb a blast of loving family energies or whatever."

Vaggie: "Wow thanks and here I thought it was actually working and them screaming LOUDER was a good thing. Got any better ideas?"

Charlie: "Maaaybe if you tried singing to them?"

Vaggie: "...."

Vaggie: "...sleeeep little baby, shut up and don't cry... uh, one of your moms is hot, and other only has just one eye..."

Hotel Crew: (cringing.jpeg)

Charlie: "Maybe I should do the singing."

Vaggie: "What? Why? That was, educational right?"

Charlie: "Childhood education usually starts with like, um, shapes, single words! Basic emotions..."

Angel Dust: "Gay is a very basic emotion."

Charlie: "...body positivity and confidence building..."

Cherri Bomb: "The eye thing."

Vaggie: "What eye thing- I DO only have one-"

Husk: "And saying it like it's the opposite of your hot girlfriend?"

Cherri Bomb: "Yeah like, rude much?"

Niffty: "Don't pass on the self hate to the baby! Give it to meeeeeeeee~"

Vaggie: "Fff- fine okay, point made. I'm not good at baby lyrics."

Charlie: "Aww Vaggie noo- why don't you try just, singing like you would for me? Like when I'm scared."

Vaggie: "For you?"

Angel Dust: "Bit early for givin' a sex education innit- Youch!"

Husk: "Shut it."

Cherri Bomb: "Don't ruin the freaking mood!!"

Vaggie: "...."

Vaggie: (slow breath) (low humming)

Vaggie: "...you've, already found so much. So many hearts you've bound- so many lives you've touched."

Baby: (goes quiet)

Vaggie: "And~ in~ the ennnd... if it's all I have to say...."

Charlie: "More than anything~"

Baby: (staring up at them)

Vaggie: "More than anything... need you to know, I love you more than anything."

Charlie & Vaggie: "More than anything..."

Their baby: (sighs) (snuggles into vaggie's shoulder) (falls asleep)

Vaggie: "...."

Vaggie: (whispers) "... charlie?"

Charlie: (whispers back) "...yeah?"

Vaggie: "I don't wanna wake them up again but uh... I can't feel my arms."

Charlie: "Oh!" (giggling) "C'mon. Let's sit down. I'll hold you, while you hold them, so you don't have to be the only one holding them. Okay?"

Vaggie: (half listening) (busy staring at baby) "Okay. Sounds good."

Husk: (SNIFFLES LOUDLY)

Charlie: "....we'll do that aaaaafter everyone else goes back to what they were doing, that is."

Hotel Crew: (grumbles and leaves, using husk's wings as tissues)

They get a package from heaven later, after Cherri smuggles a recording of a moment to Sir Pentious via Lucifer and Emily. He sent them a music box (apple shaped of course) (no sharp edges)

When they open it, two little figures of them spin together with the baby snuggle between them, and the instrumental of their "more than anything" reprise starts playing softly. their baby is fascinated and holds it tight in their tiny claws, even long after they're fast asleep

#hazbin hotel #chagige spear child au thing #chaggie #charlie morningstar #vaggie #oc kid #angel dust hazbin hotel #cherri bomb hazbin hotel #husk hazbin hotel #niffty hazbin hotel #sir pentious #silly ideas #that song already sounds like a lullaby to me anyway #all about comfort #and them promising to be there

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goldenamaranthe-blog · 3 months

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First Gift: Chaggie

Chaggie Week of First: Day 5

Charlie: Oh, Vaaaaggiiiiiieee!~

Vaggie: Charlie, if you bought me another anything, I'm returning it. I appreciate the help, but I'm starting to feel like a leach.

Charlie: (rocks on her feet back and forth awkwardly while holding something behind her back) Well.... it isn't bought.

Vaggie: (eye widens slightly as she blinks in confusion) ...Okay?

Charlie: (holds up a piece of macaroni art) Ta-da! I made this for you!

Vaggie: (takes the piece carefully) You made this?

Charlie: (bashfully as she taps her hooves) I... uh... know it's a bit childish, but I wanted to give you something to show you how much you mean to me... (blushes harder) As A Friend!!! Best Friend!!!

Vaggie: (looks at the crude macaroni artwork of what looks like Charlie and herself drawn in front of a giant, castle like building that has "Happy Hotel" written on the sign) Charlie... this isn't... well, okay, it's a little childish, but it's you. It's adorable. Thank you.

Charlie: (clasps her hands together with sparkles in her eyes) You really like it?! You're not just saying that?

Vaggie: Mmhmm. And I actually have something for you too. Just a sec. (places the art piece on her wall with a thumbtack and pulls a glittery rainbow binder out from underneath her bed along with a bag filled with craft supplies) I'm glad I was able to scrounge up some money to get you these. I figured you could use it to start organizing your thoughts for that rehabilitation hotel.

Charlie: (gasps and takes the gift with tears in her eyes as snot starts to drip from her nose) Vaaaaagggggggiiiiiiiie.... This is *sniff* the sweetest *sniiiiiiiffffff* gift *snort* anyone's ever given meeeeeeeee.

Vaggie: I take it you like it?

Charlie: (cradling the supplies to her chest like they're a stray kitten she found on the sidewalk) Thank you!

#chaggie #chaggie week of firsts #day 5 #gifts #charlie morningstar #vaggie #i felt like everyone was going to do charlie giving vaggie her ribbon or eyepatch and wanted to do something different #chaggiefirsts

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selfloverrrrrr · 5 months

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Inumaki ~ Speak a loud

Warning: smut, unprotected sex, heavy smut....

( All characters are aged up/18+)

Masterlist

Minors Do Not Interact

Read those warnings carefully....if you don't like my stories block me not report....

I was a second year student in jujutsu high. I enjoyed my life a lot there. I had friends there. They were so good. But I had a crush on one of my friend. And that was none other than Inumaki. Yes... inumaki toge. But I didn't know that inumaki also had a crush on me.

So, in jujutsu high Maki was my bestfriend. I always shared everything with her. I even told her that I have a crush on inumaki. Then like all best friends she started teasing me with his name and did things to embarrass me like push me on him or push him on me while we were talking. Maki also knew that Inumaki also have a crush on me but because both of us told her not to tell anyone, she never did.

One day panda, Maki and Inumaki were talking together. I wasn't with them. I was in a near by room. I was finding a file for my project work. Suddenly all lights turned off. "Ahh... electricity had to go now!!!" I groaned. I took my phone out turned on the flash light and started my work again. The light wasn't that strong but still I had to work with that.

"Ah...this electricity!" Maki groaned. "Salmon " Inumaki replied and turned on the flash light. They started talking again. Suddenly something came in Maki's mind and she smirked and then spoke." Hey panda you wanna know a secret?" "yes....tell me"panda replied. "You know? That inumaki is bottom." "What!" Panda was shoked. " Bonito flakes! Bonito flakes!" Inumaki protested. "Oh don't scream like that. We know very well that you are bottom" Maki replied.

"Bonito flakesssss!!!!" Inumaki protested again. " So you are saying that you are not.... then prove us" maki said with a smirk. "Kelp" he replied." So you have to do one thing...... Go in that room * points at the room* lock the door and scream with all your energy FUCK ME. Do it and we'll believe you. And yeah don't think about us. We're gonna cover our ears."

Toge agreed and went to the room closed the door behind. In other side Maki locked the door from outside. Inumaki took a deep breath then screamed with all his energy "FUCKKKKKKKKK MEEEEEEEEE!!!" he used all his energy that's why his thorat began to hurt. He can't speak anymore. But what he didn't know was that I was in that room. Suddenly all lights turned on and we saw each other. Our faces were as red as a tomato. Inumaki realised that why maki made him do it.

I couldn't control my own body. I automatically got close to him. I pressed my lips on his. My hand automatically went into his pant and boxer. He moaned in the sensetion. I deepen the kiss.

I pushed him on the floor and pulled down his pant with his boxer. He couldn't even stop me before I slide my pantie and sit on his dick. We both moaned out loudly as his full length slide inside me.

I started moving. Started riding him. We both were a moaning mess. My ridding became faster and faster. I can't stop myself. The way his dick was giving me pleasure....just ✨

My legs were already too weak. I can't even go faster. But our pleasure was so close. Seeing my situation Inumaki flipped me. Now I was on the floor and he was on top of me. Then he started thursting inside me. His thurst was way more harder and faster than mine. With a few more thurst we both came together.

Inumaki rested his forehead on mine and pulled out of me. " I love you" he spoke.

" What!?"

"I love you"

"I mean..... For real??!!"

" Salmon"

"Oh my God..... I love you too inumaki!!!"

I kissed him again.💗

Masterlist

Give me requests :) <3

#jjk #smut #jjk smut #jujutsu kaisen smut #inumaki toge #inumaki x reader #jjk inumaki #jujutsu kaisen inumaki #inumaki x you #fem reader #female reader

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mintytealfox · 2 months

Note

You mentioning that post about hand movements got me thinking about something. If I recall correctly (forgive me if not), you mentioned in that post that you didn't have much on Norton's handwriting to go on. And only now I'm remembering, he actually does have a canon signature.

Don't know where I was going with this, but I thought maybe you'd find it interesting ^^;

GAAAASSSSPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP

THIS IS A GIFT TO BEHOLD THANK YOU FOR SENDING IT MY WAAYYYY -WEEEPPSSS- LOOK AT THAT SIGNATURE OOOOOOOOOHHH MMYYY GOOODDNNEEESSSSSSSSSS!! Its so on brannndddd ITS SO ON BRAND I CAN'T BELIEVEEEE

OKAY OKAY OKAY OKAAAAYYY OKAAYYYYY I AM SO EXCITTEEDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

ARE YALL READY FOR THIISSS?? LOOOL

Some of it I can't really apply cause this is a signature instead of a paragraph or sentence lol but THERE IS SOME GOOD GOOD TO GLEAN HERE 👀

FIRST THING: There are hardly any loops in his writing and when there are its cause cursive calls for it, they are barely there 👀this tells me he is closed off and tense. Which, yes lol

SECOND THING: He writes his letters RIGHT LEANING, this tells me that he is intense and impulsive. Which.......yea, with his intenseness but impulsive? I think he has his moments now, of impulsiveness, but he strikes me as someone who takes things carefully and is only impulsive in those Fool's Gold moments

THIRD THING: He writes B I G, which tells me that he demands attention which is interesting 👀 almost like 'Watch me, I am going to be successful'

FOURTH THING: The cross of his 'T's are hella HIGH and barely on 'the stem' so here I would say that is borderline 'goals might not be grounded in reality'. Its like smack between that and 'Hight Self-Esteem' and honestly both are applicable cause I do think he technically does have high self-esteem. The only thing he doesn't have enough of, according to him, is money lol and it isn't a 'because of him' thing, its a 'because the world is unfair and sucks' thing, he believes he can get the money he needs to be free, its just the world that keeps it away from him, for now.

FIFTH THING: The writing is in a sloping upward direction! And this means he is 'Optimistic' lol which is also technically true, he is 'getting that bag' no matter what LOL Bro is optimistic about changing his life, for sure!

SIXTH THING: I want to say that he is actually writing in print and just connecting the letters and that tells me he is efficient. His letters just seem so deliberate and clear and very print like, its the simple connections that give off the vibe of cursive.

SEVENTH THING: This one is hard to tell cause this is a signature instead of a sentence where it would more clearly show, but the spacing between the first name and last isn't particularly that big of a gap or all that close either, so I think he is somewhere in the middle with this one which makes me want to say, he doesn't like crowds but does get lonely easy ;; (This one feels like I am stretching it but 7 is my favorite number and I just needed this one last ONE to get to 7 LOL)

Now I want to reassess Alice's writing to see what I missed cause I know a little more now than when I did back when writing the original hand break down before 👀

but anywho, THANK YOU FOR SENDING THIS TO MEEEEEEEEE

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amethystfairy1 · 3 days

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Hellllllooooooo. Am the only person here who still waits for the happy ending of its gonna get me by the end of the night? Have you all forgot? Moved on?? Or did i miss something??????? Are you not gonna finish it?????????????????? TELL MEEEEEEEEE

I’ve actually mentioned this before, but something rather silly happened with that fic, by which I mean when I was writing the happy ending it spiraled into its own entire AU 😅 sooooooo I don’t really wanna post the happy ending chapter two because then I’d end up with THREE AUs running and I think that might be a bit much.

As of right now, I have plans for two new AUs other than TTSBC and TT. One of which spawned from the happy ending of ‘Its gonna get me by the end of the night’ the other of which is just another thought I had that’s gone out of control and is now like 40k in my private docs 😆

Like I said tho, I’m very happy with my current set up with two AUs. TTSBC and TT are such a great duo because they give me the opportunity to write literally everything, so no matter what I’m in the mood to write, that dynamic exists somewhere within my AUs.

TTSBC has a loooooooooooooong way to go. TT not quite as much so, but certainly still a good bit.

TL/DR: I have too many AUs already and putting out the chapter two for ‘it’s gonna get me’ will for sure trigger me making a third one and I don’t think I have the bandwidth for that right now 😅

#fanfic #ao3 fanfic #amethyst rambles

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spinnysocks · 2 months

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incorrect lion guard as snapcube quotes

if you haven't watched snapcube then i'm sorry if this is really out of context LMAO but that's kinda the point :)

Makucha: See ya, cheetah!

Fuli: Huh? He's faster than Fuli. He's faster than Fuli. What?

Janja, annoyed: What is it this time Ushari?

Ushari: Janja, you found my You're A Bitch Degree!

Janja, after one of Scar's meetings: ...Something just happened.

Nduli: When was the last time you washed your paws? I haven't washed mine in four days. I've also been eating rocks-

Tamka: Rocks?! Nuh uh uh, that's not food!

Nduli: What about grass-

*Butterfly lands on Tamka's nose* Tamka: This is food Nduli!

Nduli: It's beautiful, I love your new hat! I'm gonna name him.. Mwamba!

*Butterfly starts flying away*

Tamka: You scared it away! :(

Nduli: Bye Mwamba! :)

Tamka: Bye Mwamba..

Janja: Hey, you know what this place looks like? Looks like the Pridelands! *starts singing Tonight We Strike*

Janja, to the skinks: Are you in on this conspiracy to?!

Shupavu: Everything is a conspiracy, haven't you ever seen the Circle of Life?

Janja: Wh-What?!

*waiting for Scar's meeting*

Reirei: Are we just doing this now? A bunch of assholes standing in a line? Congratulations!

Janja: Ah fuck, she got us there guys. Well.............

Ushari, while Janja's Clan are hysterically laughing: Alright, I think we need to figure out what we're going to do about this-

Kenge: It's not important that we lost! Look at who's responsible! *points at Janja*

Janja, pointing up: I'll point at you also.

Kenge: I'm not the sky, hyena.

Janja: We're doing Nne's plan? We're all agreeing that Nne came up with this right?

Cheezi: Yeah... 2, 3, 4, 5, 6- Here we go! :D

Janja to Reirei: Sorry that sounded like I wanted to kill you, I didn't mean that. *whispering to everyone else* I do wanna kill her don't fucking tell- I don't wanna kill you, don't worry! I wanna kill her so fucking bad! I didn't say anything to them just now. You know what I said! I-I gotta go, uh, think about some stuff!-

*Battle for the Pridelands in a nutshell*

Scar: Heyyyyy~ What's uppppp?~ It's meeeeeeeee~

Kion: STOP! >:(

Scar: I don't know how to impress upon you that you cannot defeat me.

The Guard: Kion!

Scar: Oh, your friends are here!

The Guard: We're here to help you!

Scar: It's really cute that you're going to defeat me with the power of friendship and all, but then again I am Scar from the Lion King, so-

Kion: You didn't let me finish, Scar!

Scar: Mhm, go ahead.

Kion: I have-

Scar: Yes, yes, yes, yes. I don't care. I do not care! You don't understand. I came back here to destroy the Pridelands. This means nothing to me! Alright? You mean nothing to me! You and your little friends are fucking annoying! This is why I stayed down in lion hell. This is why I punish Pridelanders. I'm the good guy! Do you not realise? I am the good guy here! I am the true King of the Pridelands! Mufasa goes up and he plays with all his little friends like "Oh look, are you watching over the Pridelands?" Yeah, whatever. Fuck everybody.

Kion: Ah!

Scar: I get to kill people! I get to command my army all day! It's great, give me the Pridelands! You don't get it. You watch your stupid little privileges. Fuck you. Idiot.

*The Guard yells*

Scar: Go to hell! *makes the volcano erupt* Look, I can do this! Anytime I want! This is nothing to me! You are nothing to me! I hate you! I HATE YOU! THIS IS MY BIG FUCKING VOLCANO!

Bunga: Oh my god, he's fucking losing it entirely!

Chungu & Cheezi: All around me are familiar faces, work out places, worn out places- IS THAT WHAT A HOUSE LOOKS LIKE? Oh my stars! This place is amazing! Where am I, the Pridelands?...... Worn out places~ (thanks to @devilsrecreation for that one 😭)

feel free to reblog with additions, there's too many quotes to put in here </3

#the lion guard #tlg #tlg outlanders #tlg outlanders memes #tlg memes #incorrect quotes #tlg incorrect quotes #i wanted to add more but i couldn't think of any :(#snapcube #snapcube quotes

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