#Lately I’ve been trying to learn flower language again

[rosaaee]

I was looking at the art and noticed the flowers on Mika’s birthday art are daisies. These generally mean innocence, cheerfulness and joy in flower language! Here’s more about the flower and what it may symbolise for Mika ❀

╰┈➤ The daisy on his head is a white daisy, these specifically symbolize purity and innocence! This may refer to how he’s very shy and possibly to him being a younger brother.

╰┈➤ The daisy he’s holding seems to be a yellow daisy. These symbolize cheerfulness, joy and friendships! (I’m not 100% sure if it’s actually supposed to be yellow or if it has to do with shadow/colour theory/light — which I’m not that well-versed in, so please correct me if I’m wrong — that makes it look yellow, because yellow daisies are usually more vibrant.)

╰┈➤ Daisies are known to grow all over the world, so I’d like to think that HYV refers this to him being a cartographer. Because, as we know, that simply said means making maps of places [in the world].

╰┈➤ People mainly use daisies for happy occasions like birthdays and, well, it’s Mika’s birthday!

╰┈➤ Non-flower language/symbolism related fact: daisies are the fifth most popular flowers in the world ✿

✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼ ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼ ҉ 　✼　 ҉

[scriblubed-bonnibel]

Super Blind

Close friends to lovers | Jordan Li x (gn)reader

Reader will use they/them pronouns as well (lets go nonbinaries woooh <3) Just some oneshot I’ve been brain rotting about while scrolling through tumblr.

Summary: Jordan and y/n have been flirting every now and then but can’t seem to confess. One day they just… do.

Context: reader has powers that affect their emotions. Be it taking them from others, making them feel emotions, just reading their emotions, and sometimes they can even exude their emotions; having others feel it when closer to the reader.

Warnings: bad language, cute moments, kissing

If you aren’t ok with the whole “switching between masc and fem” thing then feel free to click off (tho i doubt it cause ure reading a Jordan Li fic so yeah)

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“Emma I don’t know anymore! Jordan’s probably high fucking some- fucking dude! And I’m here lonely-“ “hey!” Emma looks at me offended, “and ranting to my best friend about my crush for like what- years now!” Emma stands up and puts her hands on my shoulders, “hey, if it’s worth anything. JORDAN TOTALLY FUCKING LIKES YOU YOU IDIOT.” She shakes me back and forth.

“You’re just saying that” I brush her off and flop on my bed. “Are you fucking kidding me?” She looks at me dumbfounded and as if I said the stupidest thing ever. “They literally gaze at you. And did you not notice the fact that uhhh you have flowers on your desk from them!” She gestures to the small flower arrangement on my desk.

“Big whoop. They got those flowers for me after I recovered from that stupid slip.” I rolled my eyes at her. “This-“ Emma trails off in frustration and face palms. “Listen, I’m just saying, Jordan, one of the top students, most probably maybe possibly has a crush on you maybe wants to even fuck you!” I laugh at her and just pull the covers over myself. “I doubt it! Now leave cause I’m pretty sure you’re late for one of your classes.”

“OH SHI-“ she’s cut off by the sound of a door slamming shut. “Loser” I laugh and close my eyes under the blanket, trying to just forget about Jordan… Jordan… Jordan… and.. y/n. Y/n and Jordan. A dreamy sigh escapes my lips as I swoon once more. Without even realizing, sleep takes over me.

Gentle knocks from my door wakes me up. “Emma for the last time my door is always open!!” I yell. “You lock your door once when she wants to visit and she just forgets it’s always open..” I grumble. The door opens slowly. “Y/n..?” Jordan’s voice calls out.

wait

Jordan’s. Voice? Their. Voice? Panic shoots through me as I sit up in distress. “Jordan-“ i cough quickly to try to sound less panicked, “uh- ahem Jordan! Hey, hi! DONT COME IN- I’m- my room is a mess-“ I look around and see the door still cracked a little bit. “Not- not looking! Just wanted you to know it’s me!” They say, laughing softly… I sigh again… their laugh- FIX YOUR ROOM AND YOURSELF GET IT TOGETHER.

I run to the full body mirror and fix myself up. Taming my bedhead, adjusting my sleeping shirt and shorts, making sure I look normal but also… maybe a tiny little bit cute. I fix up the random clutter on the floor and spray a little bit of cologne everywhere.

I get to the door and put my hand on my heart to sorta calm down. Okay… one.. two.. three and-

There is no denying how stupidly in love I looked the moment I opened the door to see them in their feminine. Eyes softened, lips in a content smile, and sighing dreamily. “Hi~” I breathed out, still swooning. They dont help my case at all when they smirk and look at me in a similar manner. “Hi…” they trail off, blinking a few times before getting both of us out of our trance.

“Sorry for uhh the whole emotion wafting off of me. Still learning how to control it.” I laugh awkwardly. They wave their hand in a ‘nah dont worry’ motion, “Y/n you know I dont mind that at all. We’re all learning.” We both smile briefly, “so, whatcha doing here?” I open the door wider and sit on my bed. They enter, closing the door behind them, and sit next to me. “I uhh honestly…” I wasn’t looking at them, too busy fiddling with my hands, but I heard them change into their masculine form. “I was just around.. and wanted to hang with you…” ‘hang out.. with me?’ I thought before I looked at them.

They were.. already looking at me. A blush slowly crept up on my face as I internally panicked, replying to cover up my distress. “Uhh yeah sure, we could invite Cate for a girls time, or maybe have Emma ditch for I dont know-” I get cut off “why not just us?” They ask, shrugging nonchalantly. “Just us?” I repeat. “Y’know… just Y/n and Jordan. Just us.” Their gaze is turned away for some reason.. “I MEAN- if you don’t want to then yeah of course Kate could come arou-” they began to ramble but I touch their hand gently, focusing on calming their emotions down.

“I would like that” I smile. “Yeah..? Like a date right that’s what I’m trying to invite you to” they clarify, their emotions wafting to me… infatuation, swooning, happiness… ‘they’re happy…’. I smile and nod happily.

They stand up and offer their hand, then an uncertainty surfaces on their face. “Uhm… do you want feminine or masculine..?” They ask still in their masculine form. “Are you shitting me? How many times do I have to say this. Anything is fine as long as it’s what you want and what you feel like.” I smile up at them and stand from the bed to give them a quick hug. I hear them changing into their feminine form/nothing change as they decide to remain in their masculine form and push them to face away from me. I smile, feeling more comfortable with them again, dropping the whole “in love with you” deal and being my authentic self.

“Now don’t fucking peak, lemme just change clothes.” I said as I looked at my closet. “Where’re we going again?”

Jordan’s POV

‘I cannot fucking believe they said yes- I mean I know Kate said they liked me but I was still unsure-‘ “Jordan!!! Helloooo?” I’m snapped out of my thoughts when Y/n shakes me from behind. “Earth to Jordannn, where are you taking meeeeee.” I chuckle at their antics, “just dress casual, we aren’t going to the fucking gala or something.” I laugh and I hear shuffling behind me. Tempted… I turn slowly- “not a fucking peep Jordan Li.” They say sternly. I laugh and put my hands up in defense “alright alright.”

Moments pass and I feel two taps on my shoulder. I turn and smile at them. Wearing such comfy yet cute clothes to our first date. Our first date. Damn.

Reader’s POV

Walking around with Jordan Li was normal. We would do this from time to time whenever stress got to us. But this was different. This was a fucking date. Like, hand brushing against each other, got coffee or tea kinda fucking date.

We decided to walk around campus, much to the distaste of Jordan. “You are sooo fucking lucky I put up with your goody-two-shoes behavior” they tell me, squinting playfully at me. “I am very lucky thank you.” I respond to spite them. They smile and shake their head.

We walk in comforting silence. It’s so strange how the context of a walk can change the whole way it feels. Normally we would just walk casually and we would talk about anything and everything. Shoving each other, being just friends. But now… it feels so… pure? I guess… like puppy love. Jordan taking glances at me and I would do the same. Whenever we meet eyes they’d chuckle as I look away shyly. They’re just… too sweet.

“Are you enjoying?”

I look up in surprise, not realizing we had stopped walking. “Yeah of course I am. Why wouldn’t I be?” I asked, worried I had done something wrong. “Just making sure, that’s all. Cause I wouldn’t want to be the only one enjoying our date” they smile at me sweetly. A worry forms in my stomach when my brain starts to go on hyperdrive. They aren’t… joking about this right…? My walls start building as I worry that Jordan was just put up to this for a stupid fucking prank.

Jordan takes my hand in worry, shifting to their masculine form. A tendency they did when they were worried about me. “Hey, what’s wrong? Did I say something?” I pull my hand back slowly. “You aren’t.. doing this for a dare right.. cause- cause I know I’m not that good at hiding my crushes but if this was a fucking joke I swear-” I’m suddenly silenced as they pull me in close for a hug. “I know Y/n. If it’s a joke, you swear you’ll make me miserable for the rest of my life.” Their chest rumbles as they chuckle. “It’s not a joke… the only thing I had help with was ask Cate to make me go to your dorm and ask you out blatantly.”

I step back a little, “you what?” I laugh incredulously. “Listen! I keep hearing rumors that you like me but I never saw it! Cate always told me that I was Super-”

“Blind?” I finish their sentence. “Yeah, Emma told me the same thing” I shake my head and laugh in disbelief. “So… you do like me?” They ask, as they lift my chin to look into their eyes. My breath hitches and I nod quietly. “Good.. cause.. I like you too… maybe.. even more than like.” They smile and shift back to their feminine form, something they did.. when they felt comfortable with me.

Their hand on my chin slowly travelled to my cheek and soothingly rubbed it with their thumb. The blush from earlier creeps up again and I silently plead that Jordan can’t feel my face slowly heat up. They chuckle, “I never realized how cute you looked whenever you blush…” the warmth blooms past my cheeks and into my chest as the butterflies flutter more intensely. “Y/n..?” Jordan asks softly, their eyes not even trying to hide the fact that they’re looking at my lips. “Yes..?” I reply just as softly.

“Can I.. kiss you?” I stop functioning the moment they stop talking. Unable to speak I do one slow and obvious nod to say yes. “Thank you” they smile and lean in lips barely touching, as if telling me that if I wanted to back out now, now is the time. But fuck that I’m getting that kiss.

I smile and kiss them deeply, tiptoeing a little bit to wrap my arms around their neck. The smile on our lips palpable and our emotions mixing with one another as pure happiness exudes from the both of us.

We part after a moment, smiling widely. They chuckle softly. “What’s so funny? Was my breath bad- did I hit your teeth? What is it what?!” I panicked.

“Nothing nothing!” They laugh, “Just… you’re so cute… I couldn’t stop feeling your butterflies wafting off of you ever since we started the date. And well.. every time you see me.”

“And you didn’t tell me?!” I gasped and hit them playfully, they shift to their masculine form and held my hands together in front of me. “I didn’t tell you because…how could I tell the cutest person in the world,” they lean in and kiss me gently once more and whisper, “that even their emotions are cute?”

This person will be the end of me… and I love it.

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EEEE I’m so glad I got to finish this cksndjsz my brain cannot for the love of me stop thinking about Jordan. THEY’RE JUST SO CISJDJSZJ C U T E.

Anyways, feel free to give comments on how I can improve ! And ofc I hope you enjoyed ♡

Edit: holy f u c k- Im v surprised this is getting 300 notes 😭 im very glad people are enjoying !! College is just biting my ass but I’m writing other fics from other fandoms!

Take care always!

[n0v4t33z]

The Piece Of Eight - Chapter of Eledonia

Pairings: Capt. Hongjoong X Female Reader , Crewmate San x Female Reader (Overall not chapter specific)

Genre: Pirate AU, Romance, historical-ish, Action, Angst, Non-Idol AU

Word Count: 10.6k

Tags/Warnings: For Mature Audiences, Violence, Language, mentions of blood and gore, Highly Suggestive at times (This is a warning for the whole story overall)

Chapter specific: y/n uses her sword on Matz, y/n protects Matz from a fellow villager and cuts him a bit in the process, y/n remembers her traumatic past, Seonghwa mentions Hongjoong's past (Overall nothing too bad right now honestly)

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!!

Spotify Playlist ⚓ | Masterlist 🏴‍☠️

Author's Note💌: Hi! This is one of my newer works and I hope whoever reads this enjoys it! I've worked very hard on this and tbh i've been working on this when I'm not writing for TS (which is alot because I'm stuck as of rn) Also I guess I'll say this right now but this story will have alot of blood and violence in the future chapters and in some instances flashbacks from MC's tragic past which will get VERY dark. I am aware not alot of people like that so before any of it starts I will warn you in future chapters of any trigger warnings. Anyway, please enjoy and don't be shy to leave me your comments or thoughts! (please be kind!) 🌙

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For as long as I can remember I’ve always been poor, not that it’s bothered me. If anything it has made me very resourceful and grateful for the little things I have in life, but it definitely would have been nice if we at least had something under our name because maybe then being prisoners for years wouldn’t have been an option. 

Then again everything that happened was against Eledonia's wishes so of course, that of being a prisoner was long ago from when I was 4 years old until I was about 13 so having to endure and watch all those years of people getting abused and tortured again and again on the daily definitely takes a toll on you. Lucky for me I put that anger I had in learning how to protect myself and my family.

 For a while my family was against it because according to them I should be focusing on something else that won’t risk me getting hurt, like being a good housewife. The way I think though is if I didn’t at least know the basics of training we’d suffer again like before and when the Saitors left our country that’s when it began.

 Now my grandpa, a retired soldier of our nation Eledonia has been training me for a few years now. He’s taught me everything I know about weapons and self defense. For the most part I train by myself by the shore near where our village is so I can hear the calming waves and stay watch in case any ship is nearby. Which is what I'm on my way to do this morning.

"Make sure not to stay too late over there, I need you to help me take these beans over to the market to see how much we can get for them" I nod "Sure, I'll be back later Mom!" I walk outside as the early morning sun slightly obstructs my vision causing me to slightly squint trying to get used to the brightness.

 While I walk down the trail I take in the beauty of the forest and see how much the flowers and leaves on the trees have bloomed since spring began, everything was so lush and green. As soon as I’m hit with the smell of the salty sea it’s my queue that I’ve arrived at my destination with no need to look over at the sea for confirmation which unknowingly at the time I’ll seemingly regret.

 I begin my training as per usual until a few hours pass by and I begin to hear shouting in the distance and splashes in the water almost like a ship was being docked. I run towards the edge of the shore and realize a man was watching me with his spyglass.

I couldn't make out his features but panicking now knowing how long he’d been watching me I start sprinting back home with adrenaline coursing through my veins. It takes me less than 5 minutes to arrive at my village's territory before I begin to yell in panic “A ship is docking!! They’re pirates!”

The villagers look at each other in confusion and panic until I spot the chief. I run as fast my legs could take me but my legs feels weak from the Imminent fear. At this point I don't know how I'm still standing.

 “Chief there are pirates docking their ship right now!! Please anyone! One of them looked right at me, they know there are people here now! ”

 Immediately the Chief rings a bell 3 times then walks over to me gently placing his hand on my shoulder “Thank you for telling me Metztli, run to gather your family and we’ll all head over to the underground cave.”

 I obediently nod and hurriedly run home and notice my mom feeding my little brothers  while my father and grandfather were having some sort of conversation then while still slightly out of breath I say “There’s a ship docking right now and it’s a pirate ship, we have to go..” 

Everyone freezes for a moment then my grandfather lets out a sigh and gets up “Let’s go. Leave everything as it is.” My parents begin packing a few things meanwhile I grab a few of my books and some of my clothes enough for a few days. 

When we arrive at the underground cave I notice the whole clan was there, of course our clan wasn’t very big but to see everyone gathered up there was shocking to see how many people were scared of the same thing happening all over again. Of course I don’t blame them, it was a time none of us want to remember. 

The inside of the bunker of the cave was far from fancy, it was basically a hole in the ground with a few torches on the walls for light and a few scattered bonfires for warmth and cooking, everything else was just rock.

 After a week in the bunker we all grew impatient and very hungry so the chief sent a few people out at dawn to see if the boat was gone, when the men came back they alerted the chief the boat was gone from where it was docked marking it safe for us to return back to our homes.

That very same day after returning home my mother sends me off to the market to buy a few necessities we ran out of while in the underground bunker. When I arrived at the market I realized I had a smile on my face, it was nice seeing everyone going back to normal. It was definitely a close call, it still doesn’t sit right with me how one of the people in that ship saw me. 

Luckily they’re long gone by now so I shouldn’t think about it too much. I walk over to a vegetable stand with a small old lady running it “Oh hi sweetie, how are you? What would you like today?” I smile and hand her the crescents along with the reusable grocery bag  “It’ll be the usual Rosalia.”

 She smiles and begins to load up the bag with vegetables “Aren’t you glad that ship was false alarm? I don’t think my old self could handle another invasion again honestly.” I nod “Another one would be a curse that was so scary, my heart almost jumped out of my throat when I saw them.”

 She hands me the grocery bag and says “Luckily it wasn’t anything to worry about sweetheart. Alright, be safe and go ahead and let your mother know I said hi.” I nod and wave goodbye and head over to the next vendor to buy my grandfather’s favorite snack, coconut candy.

 Although I really dislike the weirdly textured candy my grandpa seems to enjoy it and honestly that’s okay as long as he’s happy.

“Oh hi y/n what brings you here today?” I set bag of vegetables on the floor and dig into my pocket for money “Oh I’ll just have one coconut candy today for my grandpa” He grabs the candy and hands it over to me “One crescent”

 I nod and hand him the money and begin to walk away “y/n, wait up!” Causing me to halt in my steps and turn that’s when he wraps a small piece of cake and puts it in a small box and hands it over to me “It’s not much but it’s a small thanks for alerting the chief about the ship earlier this week” 

I reach over for the box with a “Oh wow thank you so much Armando, you have no idea how grateful i am for this.” I bow my head slightly and he does the same “Goodbye y/n take care!” I smile and wave goodbye and begin to walk towards the entrance of the market that’s when I see two young men around my age wearing unfamiliar attire.

 The shorter one’s hair was an unnatural shade of blonde with his hair being short in the front but long in the back, a small braid adorning his hair. His dark eyes are rimmed to resemble smoky soot stained eyes giving him a very intense look, he wore a simple cross chain around his neck and a single silver earring on his right ear, and wore a black odd looking cape thing and under it he wore a simple black long sleeve, on his left arm there was a black band of some sort that had an hourglass shape with a circle in the middle and 4 phases of the moon surrounding it. 

He also wore some sort of black pants accentuating his small figure. For the one standing next to him which was the taller one, his hair was jet black, and wore very similar style clothing only this one opted for a white colored long sleeve shirt and a grey colored vest over it to accentuate his small waist with the same sort of odd black cape thing over his shoulders.

 His pants being the same ones as the short one just iike their boots. One thing that stuck out is the tall one had a visible weapon on his back, a shot gun.

Fuck. Pirates. The shorter one leans over to tell the taller one something and that’s when the taller one begins walking in my direction. I have no weapons on me, I have to go. I drop my stuff and make a run for it into the forest. 

While I run I hear the man call out to me in the distance but unfortunately my fear is not letting me decipher what he was saying. I begin to run in the direction of the river by the water fall but take the alternate lesser known route.

 When I make it to the river I hide behind the waterfall that’s when I hear the tall man call out to me “Hello? I promise we won’t hurt you. We just want to talk.” I scoff almost laughing at his words. Not hurt me? Then why was he hoisting around a fucking shot gun on his back? 

I decide to stay quiet while he continued to try and lure me out then a few minutes later the shorter man with the arm band joins him at the side of the river and he joins him with the same words the other was protesting saying that they will not hurt me which is honestly hard to believe as I can now see the shorter one has weapons too. 

Suddenly the shorter one begins to speak my language “Hello, I will not hurt you. I want to talk.” I sigh realizing they know I’m here then I nervously say “How do I know that? The tall one and you have weapons.”

Both the shorter and taller man look at each other in surprise not expecting me to answer them back that’s when without hesitation the shorter man unholsters his gun and throws it in the river along with the sword that was perfectly hidden under his long cape thing. The tall one removes the gun from his back and throws it in the river the and shorter one continues “I am sorry. Can you come out?”

 Hesitantly I step out from behind the waterfall and I pick up a few rocks and throw them in their direction causing them to step back giving me enough room to grab the sword they threw into the river. “What do you want?”

 I point the sword at both of them causing them to both have their hands raised in mercy then the shorter one says “Alliance.

” I furrow my eyebrows “I’m confused, I’m poor. I have no influence.” He nods understandably “You have strength, I saw you training by the water when we first met 7 days ago” Suddenly it dawns on me this man was the same man watching me train through his spy glass by the shore.

 Unable to form any words out of shock I stay silent and the man continues “My name is Hongjoong, next to me is Seonghwa what about you?” Hesitantly I look around and study their expressions, they seemed genuine but a part of me is too scared to trust them “y/n.” 

I cannot tell them my real name, it’s way too dangerous. Hongjoong blinks a few times then says “You speak the universal language?” I nod “Yeah.” He sighs in relief “I’m sorry but that’s good because I was running out of Eledonian. I’m sorry If I was really bad at it I only know enough to get by.”

 I stay quiet for a few seconds then I muster the courage to say “Where did you dock? I swear your ship was gone when we checked this morning.” 

Hongjoong looks at the waterfall behind me then back at me “Ah, yeah we docked further down where our boat is hidden from other incoming boats.” 

I squint my eyes and press the tip of the sword right where his heart is “You better not be lying, if you try anything I will personally be the one to kill you.”

Hongjoong smirks and gently pushes the sword away from his chest “No worries, I wasn’t planning on it. Like I said, I want an alliance.” I narrow my eyes “Why are you asking me?” 

He steps away from me and looks over at Seonghwa and nods. Immediately Seonghwa hits my hand causing me to drop the sword and grabs my hand and twists it behind my back but I lean forwards making him weaken his grip on my arm and slightly lose his balance. 

I take that as an opportunity to kick him behind the knees and pick up the sword where I tightly press the blade against his neck while I stand behind him. Hongjoong slowly claps while walking back towards me smirking “I’m asking because I want you to be my protector. I knew it when I first saw you training by the shore. Fluid like water and precise like a bullet.” 

Nobody’s ever referred to me like that. He sure does know how to compliment people, I’ll give him that.

 I press the blade a little harder on Seonghwa’s neck causing him to quietly hiss “I’m sorry but I barely even know you. I cannot just leave my family for a bunch of pirates I don’t even know. There is only one person who I’m going to kill and his name is Miyagawa Masaki. Killing another human isn’t in my book unless they’ve hurt me or my family in any way.”

Hongjoong’s features soften dropping the plotting smirk and extends his hand in my direction “Alright, let’s get to know each other then because what if I tell you there’s hundreds like him? Ruining the lives of the poor and defenseless? Killing innocent people and eliminating hundreds of bloodlines. Would that change your mind?” 

I glance down at Seonghwa who was stiffly leaning away from my sword his head gently resting against my stomach, he gives a scared but genuine nod of reassurance of Hongjoong’s words.

  For a few seconds Hongjoong and I’s gazes mutually connect, something in his gaze tells me maybe I should trust him. I mean I can easily overpower either of them if anything goes wrong.

 I remove the blade from Seonghwa’s neck and push him towards Hongjoong causing him to fall on his hands and knees “Get out of here before I regret not killing you.” 

Seonghwa gets up then gently puts his hand on Hongjoong’s shoulder “I don’t think she’s coming Captain.” Hongjoong turns to Seonghwa and gives him a smirk and proceeds to walk in my direction and chuckles “I’m sorry for that y/n I just really wanted to see you in action up close. I really didn’t mean for that to be a personal attack.”

 I roll my eyes “How am I supposed to trust you if you literally attacked me. If anything you’re making me not want anything to do with you.” He smiles and says “Ah, so you were considering it at some point then?”

 I cross my arms and look at the ground “Perhaps..” Hongjoong pushes a strand of hair behind my ear completely catching me off guard by this gesture “What if I told you that if you come with me you wouldn’t have to worry about anything, I’ll pay for it. I’ll pay for food and supplies for your village, for protection, and I’ll even add money so that your family doesn’t have to worry while you’re away.”

I blankly look down then back at him and almost silently I say “I don’t know.” Seonghwa hesitates for a second but then gently pats my back “You don’t have to decide right now, it’s okay.” 

Hongjoong gently pats my arm “How about I treat you for lunch then we’ll come back to how you feel about me.” I nod “Yeah sure, but I’m keeping your weapons.”

 Without turning my back on them I carefully step back and step back into to the river while keeping my eyes on both men and pick up the shotgun and pistol. “I’ll give these back if I approve.

 Also, just for that little stunt you played before we go you have to help me with the groceries I was carrying.” They both nod and we head back to the market then I point at the groceries on the ground with my sword “Go get my stuff pirate boys.”

 Both men walk over and pick everything up then Seonghwa says “Where to?” I walk in between them and begin walking back to my home. 

After a bit of walking In silence I finally muster enough guts to break the ice "So uh why exactly are you guys here in Eledonia?" Seonghwa answers ”Supplies honestly, we were running out of a few things but of course the Captain saw you training and he wanted to meet you so we kinda gave the supplies duty to the rest of the crew while we looked for you."

 I quietly hum “So how many other crew members are there?” Hongjoong answers almost on queue “There’s eight of us in total who are in charge of overseeing the main duties so the other six are doing the supplies duty. The rest are sailors who help us run the ship.” 

The more welk the more I notice we’re now in my village's territory then In a low voice I say “By the way please don’t act scary, we’re in my village’s territory now.” They both make reassuring hums and as we walk to my house the rest of the villagers stare at us, their gazes burning into my skin. I’m sure they’re probably wondering why I’m even with people like this. 

Out of seemingly nowhere I see a fellow villager walking towards us with a weapon in hand “Get away from them Metztli!” I extend both my arms in front of Hongjoong and Seonghwa causing them to abruptly stop “Acatl there’s no need! They won’t hurt us!”

 He walks over towards me and pulls me aside and swings his weapon at both males “Like hell they are..”

I unsheathe my sword and step in front of him fully stopping the weapon from hitting either of them “You are not going to hurt them. We are not in danger.”

 Acatl clenches the hilt of the weapon “They are not who they say they are, they are not good people. All pirates are just as bad as those stupid silver spooned goons, all they do is lie to get what they want.” 

I turn to Hongjoong and Seonghwa and under my breath I utter  “Stay back.” and lock my gaze into Acatl’s “Stop being ignorant, just because we were hurt by some soulless bastards doesn’t mean it’ll happen again.” 

I push his weapon back slightly just enough for me to be able to swing my sword at him and graze his arm then take another quick swing at his hand causing him to drop his weapon and clutch his bleeding hand on his knees.

 “How could you protect these men?! And betray your own people like this?!” I point my sword at him to stay down “I protect those who deserve to be protected and right now they needed my protection, if they were to ever betray my trust they shall have the same fate as my enemy.”

 He slowly gets up clutching his hand “You are wrong for this, you are wrong for going against our village.” I smirk sheathing my sword and dusting myself off “I didn’t go against my people, I simply made peace where there would have been unnecessary deaths.”

As Acatl was about to say something the chief walks up to us with anger tinged in his voice “What is going on here?”  before I’m able to explain anything I hear my mom yell at me from a distance with the rest of my family following after her and with surprise and utter fear on her features.

 “Who are these men Metztli?! Why are they here?!” before I can explain anything my father and grandfather come up next to my mother to try and calm her down  “What’s going on?” 

“I can explain. These men are not evil, they just came here to buy some supplies for their ship and they happened to see me struggling with the groceries so they’re helping me. Then this idiot Acatl starts attacking us and so I just prevented unnecessary deaths.” 

The chief crosses his arms in front of him still clearly upset “Metztli just because someone does a nice thing for you doesn’t mean they are good.”

 My dad gives Hongjoong and Seonghwa a glare “You know better than to lead strangers to the village. You can never trust these punks, especially men.”

 I nod “I understand but they’re not bad people father. They were just helping me.” My grandfather gives me a stern look “What did I tell you about trust Metztli? Trust only yourself, no one else.”

I turn and I signal both men to set the things down “They’re just now leaving don’t worry.” I begin to gently push them the other way then Hongjoong turns and says “I want her to come with us. I want her to protect me.”

 I look at him in horror and shake my head he looks into my eyes for a few moments, smirks and continues “If she comes with us I will pay for the supplies in your village and I’ll pay a militia to protect and alert us in case anything ever happens. I’ll also throw in some money so the village can be renovated since I see the places being inhabited are severely run down and you know for whatever else you need the money.”

 Hongjoong looks down at my little brothers standing behind my mother and gives them a soft smile “I promise the rest of our crew will not let anything happen to your daughter. I’m just putting this out there, there doesn’t need to be an answer right now since y/n herself isn’t entirely sure either.”

 Hongjoong gives me a small smile and pats my head while Seonghwa  gives me a reassuring nod “Well, we will go now.” Hongjoong adds then my grandfather responds “Come again tomorrow, but lunch is on you guys.” 

Slightly taken aback both men nod and smile. Hongjoong then says “We will return tomorrow, it’s a promise.”

The chief looks over at my grandfather and says “Are you sure about this? Welcoming strangers like this?” My grandfather watches the 2 pirates walk away while everyone else watches him in silence “Their proposition was interesting don’t you think chief? We’ll benefit out of this.”

 The Chief gives no response to my grandfather for a few seconds then looks over at Actatl holding onto his bloodied hand then back at me “I cannot get past just blindly trusting people we’ve never met before, it’s off putting not just for me but for the rest of the village.”

 My grandfather nods then turns and gives me a smile “We have my granddaughter if anything happens. She will protect her village at any cost no matter who it is. After all, It was I who trained her or what? Are you doubting my granddaughter’s prowess?”

 The chief stays silent then I give him a reassuring smile, like an indication that this situation was over everyone begins to head back to their homes including the chief. Acatl is the only one who stays behind and stares at me for a few seconds “If something happens this is your fault.” 

He walks away and I bite the inside of my mouth to hold back from further saying anything that’ll cause him to come back. To be truthful I am scared they may earn my trust then betray me but on the other hand I want to believe that nothing will happen and that they are genuinely good people.

The next day while taking a short break during training I hear the leaves rustling from behind and to my surprise it was Hongjoong and Seonghwa again. I’m pleasantly surprised they showed up, you’d think after what transpired yesterday they’d leave but I guess they aren’t weak hearted. 

“Hongjoong? Seonghwa? What are you guys doing here?” The blonde man extends his hand towards me and helps me up.

“I’m here because I want to thank you for yesterday.” I shake my head “Oh no sir I-” Hongjoong lifts his hand to silence me and says “You protected me and my first mate and I really appreciate that especially considering you had no obligation to do so. You could have easily let him kill the both of us but you didn’t.” 

He’s right, I didn’t need to save him. I could have let him fight his own fights but for some reason it’s like my body acted on its own. Seonghwa gives me a warm smile “For that we would like to ask you if you would like to be our friend. Our connection to Eledonia.” A connection? Me? Out of all the nobles or more important people here in Eledonia they ask me?

"I would be happy to be your friend." Hongjoong gives me a relieved smile “Well, that settles it. We are friends.” Seonghwa stands next to me and rests his elbow on my shoulders.

 "Okay, well maybe now that we're friends we should follow through with your grandfather and have lunch." I hum wiping the sweat off my forehead with a small cloth “Now that you mention it, I am kind of hungry.” 

Seonghwa squeezes my shoulders while behind me “Good, we’ve got some nice things prepared for you.” I squint my eyes “I would like to assume it’s a good thing and not a bad one.” 

Seonghwa and Hongjoong chuckle “It’s a good thing my dear, I had the cook of our crew make us some delicious food. They’ll be in the main square later serving the village so I’m sure your family will be there as well since we let them know this morning.”

 Seonghwa nods “Yes, so practice a few more hours and by then the food should be ready, we just came here and decided to give you some motivation so you’d finish your training strong.” I smile at both males “Seriously, thank you.” they both smile and Hongjoong responds “My pleasure, y/n. Anything to show you we’re worth trusting.”

 Wow, he really is trying his hardest if he’s going to go all out like this. Seonghwa excitedly smiles “We’ll see you later okay? Please come by, we’d really like for you to meet the crew” Wow, they really are so confident i’m going to leave. I look over at them and  nod “of course, I’ll be there no worries” Both men say their goodbyes and leave. I sit down for a few minutes and rest before I resume my training for the day.

After a few hours go by I decide to start walking home and the whole way there I think to myself why I saved these men and why was I being so selfless with them. Why did I feel the need to protect the Captain and his right hand man when I don’t even know them, this was all becoming so confusing to me. Not to mention my extreme trust issues with everyone, so I just can’t explain why I decided to trust them. Why am I so drawn to them?

When I arrive at the main square I see alot of people gathered around the front of my house. As I walk closer I notice Hongjoong talking to my grandfather while Seonghwa and another guy play with my siblings. 

There was an unknown male by the fire cooking and a few others whom I didn’t recognize but I knew were with “The Captain” judging by their clothes so those men must be his crew members. They’re feeding everyone I see, they’re really trying to win over not only my family but the whole village. 

I walk over to my mom and ask “Mom, when did they get here?” while watching my little brothers play she says “They got here a few hours ago. Hongjoong, the blonde one said he wanted it to be a surprise for you when you came back from training. You should go eat now, they brought meat! It’s your favorite.” I nod then I turn and see my grandpa and the chief speaking to Hongjoong, he looked happy. I hadn’t seen my grandpa smile since grandma died.

A sudden grip to my shoulder makes me slightly jump “You should go eat, the food will be gone by the time you’re done staring.” I turn and see Seonghwa holding a plate in his hand slightly out of breath giving me a sweet smile “Ah, hah I will sorry just got distracted.”

 I hope he didn’t think I was checking the captain out. That would be weird. Seonghwa walks over to me and hands me a plate of food and honestly it looked and smelled delicious. Roasted potatoes and meat. Meat is considered a delicacy and we can’t eat it very often because of how expensive it is so seeing it on my plate made my stomach rumble so I begin to eat before I even sit down.

 Seonghwa turns to me and chuckles “You like meat? It’s good right?” I nod while sitting down on the grass in front of the tree by the square since It was a little quieter here “I’m glad you liked it, I’m sure Wooyoung prepared it with his secret combination of spices. It makes things so much more tasty.” 

For a little bit there was a silence from the both of us eating but eventually I decide to get brave and ask “Are you guys really not going to hurt our people? Like you’re not doing this as a gimmick to gain our trust then kill or imprison all of us?” 

Seonghwa, slightly taken aback chokes a bit on his food and begins to cough, once a bit composed he clears his throat “No, of course not. We’re The Piece of Eight. We don’t steal from the people, we steal for them. All of our targets are all either royals, nobles, military chiefs or generals, politicians even but never the regular people who aren’t associated with that stuff. If anything we’re most infamously known for being anti government and helping villages who need it the most.”

So they’re basically like the story of Robin Hood, steal from the rich and help the poor. It’s understandable, the rich can be quite nasty. They’re very ungrateful.

 “Sounds a like a great cause, does that mean you have alot allies?” He slightly purses his lips “Somewhat, but it’s enough for it to help us not get caught.” 

I shove another spoonful of potatoes in my mouth “Also I guess I should explain this but, the reason Hongjoong needs an assassin and a protector is because the royals and government know about us now and they’re out to get the captain and knowing how he is he doesn’t want to appease the rich, much less the government meaning he’s going to keep doing what he’s doing even if he needs to kill people to get what he wants and what he wants is to put those people in their place and show them they’re not special that at the end of the day they’re a sack of skin and blood..”

 I stare aimlessly and un focus my gaze and without thinking I say “I agree with your agenda. Rich people are selfish and are out of touch with reality. They’re heartless and evil, I hate them. I hate them all.” Seonghwa furrows his eyebrows “Did something happen for you to strongly feel that way?”

 I set my plate down and shrug “Well, long story short the Saitor Kingdom invaded Eledonia and they killed hundreds of people and imprisoned alot of them as well. My village and other poor villages were taken as prisoners to work for the Saitors with the only pay was being fed enough to be kept alive. It was almost daily where there was an execution of a prisoner for seemingly stupid offences that had no reason to be that serious some of those were of course some members of my village. It was 9 years of complete and utter hell.”

The dark haired man sighs and says in a low tone of voice “I completely understand why you’d hate people like that. Some of us in the crew, specifically Hongjoong had the same luck as you except he was left with nothing.” 

A knot grows in my throat, as much as I didn’t know the Captain like that I can only imagine losing everyone you know and care about. “Meaning he has nothing left to lose.” I say with a knot in my throat and he nods “Yeah, which is why the crew is as close as it is because he considers us all his family.”

 I focus my gaze again and it happens to fall upon the Captain, seeing him smile while talking to the Chief, and my grandfather somehow broke my heart. As much as I know how annoying it is to be pitied, here I am doing it to a complete stranger who probably doesn’t want any of it. 

 “This is why he helps the people, because he knows his family would have wanted him to do something good with his life even if it’s somewhat subjective to other people.” So Hongjoong is a good guy, to be this young and already be so accomplished takes skill and he clearly has the skill and motivation for it all. Unfortunately at the cost of the people he loved the most.

“Sometimes it’s good to be going against the current, and I respect him for it.” Seonghwa adjusts himself more comfortably and puts his plate aside and exhaling softly.

“We all do too, but as of today I also respect you as well for enduring torture and witnessing such horrible atrocities everyday for 9 years, that must have been traumatizing.” I glance over at the people in my village, seeing how happy they looked.

 “Yeah, I guess seeing someone get shot in the face or get bludgeoned to death isn’t something a kid should be witnessing. Till this day I can still hear them choking on their own blood.” I look down at my hand and stipple my fingers on my palm.

 “I can tell you’re very close to the Captain.” I say changing the subject, it’s not that I don’t want to talk about it it’s more like I can’t talk about it because evreytime I do I can hear the blood squelching, bones breaking, and agonizing screams. They're so vivid. 

Seonghwa seems to catch on what I was doing and replies “We are actually, so close I know him like the back of my hand. Although sometimes it’s hard for him to show he cares so to a normal person it might look like he doesn’t care very much but he does he just does it differently than other people. Because to be honest I don’t think I’ve ever seen him be affectionate towards someone.” 

I giggle “Reminds me of my grandpa, he’s the same way. With my grandpa showing affection is him telling me stories from when he was a soldier or buying me some candy when we go to the market, things like that.”

Seonghwa chuckles and points with his eyes in the direction of Hongjoong speaking to my grandpa “No wonder they get along so well.” It’s so nice to see my grandpa smile, it’s been a while since he did.

 Ever since my grandma died my grandpa hasn’t smiled very much or that of all. In a way it seems like they’re both healing each other by speaking with each other. Suddenly I hear Hongjoong call out for Seonghwa, apologetically he looks over at me and says “I’m so sorry our conversation was cut short, Hongjoong is calling me.”

 I shake my head and motion him to Hongjoong “Go ahead I need time to myself anyway, I need to think whether or not I’m going to go with you guys.” Seonghwa reaches over and pats my shoulder “Alright, just remember do what your heart tells you not what others say.” I chuckle “I’ll keep that noted.” Seonghwa gets up and takes both our empty plates with him leaving me with my thoughts while I also observe the strange men here. No doubt they were all handsome and charismatic including Hongjoong and Seonghwa which is the reason why I’m assuming everyone grew to trust them so quickly. Even so, I’ll keep my eyes on them.

In the distance I see 2 black haired men walking towards me one had cat like eyes with dark hair and a grey streak in his hair, he was scrawny looking but has very wide shoulders while the other one had jet black hair, a strong jawline, and a small mole under his right eye. They both sit in front of me and smile “Hey, I’m Wooyoung and this is San. Hongjoong told us about you, so did you make up your mind? Are you coming with us?”

 Slightly taken a back from how forward  this Wooyoung guy is I shake my head “I don’t know, I’m not sure.” San gives me a dimpled smile “I hope you do, it’d be nice to have a new crew member.” 

Wooyoung looks over at San “Nah, you just want her to join us because she’s a girl.” San shoots a glare at Wooyoung “No, it would be nice if I could just have a reasonable person to talk to sometimes instead of an idiot like you who only says dumb things” Wooyoung teases San.“You have Yeosang and Yunho for that, they’re reasonable”  

I raise an eyebrow and smirk “Who says I’m reasonable though?” San looks at me like I’ve betrayed him while Wooyoung lets out a particularly loud laugh then I giggle “I’m just kidding, I’m y/n by the way.”

 I extend my hand towards San and smile almost without a second thought he reaches over and shakes my hand. His gaze connecting with mine with a small hint of awe he says “You have a nice name, It fits you really well.” Wooyoung then says “Is that really your name?” I laugh and nod “Yeah why? Does it throw you off that I have a universal language name instead of a more traditional name?” Wooyoung nods and says “Honestly yeah, but he’s right you have a nice name”

 If only they knew. So far they’re easy to get along with, I may end up taking this job just so my family stops being in the slums and my village as a whole is respected.

“So, how old are you guys?” I smile and look over at the two males and without hesitation Wooyoung replies “19, so is this guy. What about you?” I raise my eyebrow “You know you shouldn’t ask a girl her age, that's rude...” 

San stammers “I'm sorry we meant no disrespect..” I smirk “But if you must know though.. I'll give you a hint, i’m a few years older than you both” They both blink in shock then Wooyoung says “Wait how much older?” 

I shrug “Not more than 2 years” Wooyoung chuckles  “Ohh well you know I thought you were younger than us when I first approached you, you’re so short.” I scoff “I’m a girl of course I’m going to be short, common sense.” Wooyoung holds back a laugh “No I mean you’re short, short. I thought you were a child.” I roll my eyes “Yeah I am, short so what.” Wooyoung gives me a teasing smile While San says “You know that means you’re older than both our Captain and Seonghwa..” 

I raise an eyebrow “Are you guys calling me old?” They both shake their heads then Wooyoung nervously chuckles “Not at all! Actually, I was going to ask if you wanted some of the dessert I made. That’s the sole reason San and I came over was to ask.” I give them both a smile “Yeah sure, that would be nice. Thanks.” He gives me a smile and nods “Okay I’ll be right back, San stay.”

San lays back onto the soft grass and rests his hand on his stomach and replies " Sure, I'd love to.” Awkwardly I sit there for a few seconds not knowing what to say until San says “Listen, if you happen to join us and anyone in the crew ever says anything hurtful don’t listen to them, They can be bastards sometimes, it’s like they forget how to interact with other people.”

 I look up at the blue sky avoiding eye contact with him, feeling his gaze on me. “Thanks, I’ll keep that noted If I decide to go.” After this brief interaction San and I both look up at the sky in comfortable silence until Wooyoung comes back and hands me a small little bowl with some sort of probably foreign dessert and says “I’ve brought you dessert, I’m not sure how sweet you like things but it’s not overwhelmingly sweet. It’s a type of peach tart, it’s really good. I don’t know if you’ve ever had it before.” 

I examine the “peach tart” and to my knowledge I’ve never seen anything like it. “I actually have never seen anything like this before this looks very foreign to me, although I have seen cake before and we only have it for special occasions it’s very rare if we get to eat sugary things like this because they’re so expensive.” 

I take the silver ware he brought with him and take a bite out of it “Oh wow, this is delicious.” Wooyoung gives me a prideful smirk “That’s only because I made it.” I giggle and take another bite “Well your cooking is amazing, let me guess you cooked the meal today too didn’t you?” He nods with a big smile on his face then San says “Look at you, you’re so full of yourself.” He gives San a smirk “You’re just mad she didn’t compliment you.”

In the distance two more men walk up to where we were sitting except these two looked very tall, extremely tall almost like two twin towers. One had dark hair parted down the middle with the fringe of his hair adorning his soft puppy like features and the other one had black rimmed glasses, his hair was dark blue and had a neatly slicked back side part on his hair. 

Both men were definitely taller than Seonghwa for sure, and he was the person I originally considered tall. Wooyoung notices me staring behind him and he turns “Oh hey Mingi and Yunho, this is y/n. Hongjoong’s possible new protector and crew mate.” 

The dark haired one squints and looks at Wooyoung slightly confused then the one with glasses says “She’s so tiny, she looks like a doll…” Wow, I’ve never heard that one before, I was just called a child a few minutes ago. “You think Hongjoong will have her dressed up all cute and she’ll be like a cute killer doll or something?” 

The dark haired one’s expression looks at Mingi in disgust “Maybe you should stay quiet Mingi, you’ll scare away the Captain’s new protector.” Yunho then looks over at me and gives me a concerned look “He’s weird please don’t listen to him. Anyway, hello y/n I’m Yunho” Mingi then responds “I’m Mingi, hi ” I give them both a smile and shake both their hands “Hello, i’m y/n”

 Mingi gives me a very shy dorky smile then I cross my arms in front of my chest knowing exactly where he was looking “So, you guys are pirates right? So does any of you have specific roles or duties?” Wooyoung then says “Ah yeah we do. I’m the cook.” Yunho gives me a curt smile “I’m the doctor” San raises his hand shyly “I’m the craftsman, I fix and make things.”

Lastly Mingi pushes up his glasses and gives me a dimpled smile “I’m the navigator, I work out which way the ship needs to go and I check if the conditions are right for safe travel” Wooyoung continues “Hongjoong of course is the Captain, Seonghwa is the First Mate and Quartermaster which in short just means that he's Hongjoong's right hand man and if Mingi, Jongho or Yeosang need an extra hand he’s there to help.” 

I look around my front yard and point over at the two male figures playing with my brothers “What about those two? What do they do?” Mingi sits next to me and says “Well..Yeosang is the helmsman, the guy who steers the ship and keeps it going in the direction it needs to go while Jongho is the gunner which is a fancy word for the guy who sets up and orders the canons to be fired and helps Yeosang and I with surveillance.”

 I nod with my lips slightly pursed “Hm, wow that’s some awesome duties you guys have.” Yunho shrugs “It has their ups and downs, sometimes I second guess myself as to what I’m doing on that ship” San then says “What about you? What role do you play in your village?” I run my fingers below on the soft grass next to me “I’m poor, I don’t have a role. I have no influence or power. The most my family has done is my grandpa being an Eledonian soldier, he was the one who’s trained me since I was about 16 or 17 years old making that maybe 5 or 6 years of him training me.” 

Mingi gasps “Wait, wait, you’re older than all of us including Seonghwa?! You look so young, how is that possible?!” Wooyoung looks over at Mingi “We already freaked out about that..” Mingi rips out some grass from next to him and throws it at Wooyoung “Excuse me but I wasn’t here when that happened “ Wooyoung dusts the grass away “You snooze you lose, and geez stop that you’re going to get grass in y/n’s peach tart.” 

Mingi mocks Wooyoung causing him to roll his eyes and gets up “Okay I’m going now, I need to go clean up are you coming or not San?” San motions him to leave and closes his eyes “I’m fine where I’m at” Yunho gets up and follows behind Wooyoung “I’ll help!” Mingi gets up and pats my head “I’ll see you later little doll my companion has just left me.” He catches up with Yunho and Wooyoung. 

As soon as he leaves I let out a soft sigh and rest my head against the trunk of the tree looking in the direction of my family, mom, dad, siblings, and grandpa. What would life be without them? San noticing this he sits up and looks in my direction “Are you okay?” I nod and give him a smile “Ah, yeah I’m just exhausted from training this morning.” He nods and scoots over next to me “Ah, I see.” Ahh fuck I was going to get up after this.

I don’t want him to feel bad for getting up right after he sits next to me. I guess it wouldn’t hurt sitting here. “So.. do you have friends?” I continue staring ahead at my siblings and the whole scene before me and I press my lips into a line for a few seconds then a weak smile paints my features “I did at one point, but my obsession with training and everything kind of drove them away. That and I tend to stay in my own world and nobody wants to deal with those types of people.”

 From the corner of my eyes I can see San give me a look of pity then I continue “But that’s fine because I get more stuff done, having friends is a nuisance. “ He thickly swallows almost like he was going to say something but decided he wasn’t going to say anything and very slightly nods “I see, I’m sorry you feel that way.” 

I turn and give him a bright smile “Enough of me though, how long have you been with the crew?”  San thinks about his answer for a bit and says "Hm, like 2 or 3 years? I'm not sure but I've been here for a while." I slowly nod gently running my fingers through the grass "So since you've been out at sea for a bit you probably already know how it is out there." He hums "Yeah, it's pretty bad. More often than not there's always ships trying to rob us so we're constantly on guard not to mention the government being after us doesn't help at all."

God, that sounds horrible. Living every single day on fight or flight mode? On borrowed time? "Wow, that sounds…exhausting." San chuckles "Hah yeah, it is. The only difference is that having the crew there with you helps a lot. You forget the atrocities of the world for a bit until you have to face them all over again." 

San shifts his gaze from the sky over to me, despite his smaller frame it didn't take away from how handsome he looked which made his stare a bit more intimidating "Don't worry though, like I said you've got me if you're ever in a tight spot." I quietly nod and give him a shy smile “Oh, thanks.” we both sit there in silence again until I feel a sudden tap on my shoulder, when I turn around I see my younger brother standing there “So uh, brother kind of fell and he’s crying.”

 I let out a sigh “Dude, mom’s told you guys to be careful.” He nods “I didn’t do anything, he was being a show off with those pirate guys.” I get up and turn to San “I’m sorry. If you’ll excuse me I need to check on my brother’s dumbassry.” He chuckles and gives me a dimpled smile “Oh sure go ahead.” 

I give San a small curt smile and walk behind my brother leading me the way to my crying brother. When I arrive I see Jongho awkwardly patting my younger brother’s back trying to console him While Yeosang looks on slightly uncomfortable. Once he sees me Jongho looks over at me and says “Oh hey, your brother fell off the swing trying to show us a trick.” I cover my face in frustration and embarrassment then fake a smile looking at my little brother “Didn’t mom tell you to stop that?” He sobs nodding “I’m sorry, I thought it would have been cool for them to see.”

I close my eyes trying not to cringe out of my skin and open them gently patting his head “Look, you could show them those cool tricks you do playing ball. You could seriously get hurt doing that, I’m sure they’ll still think it’s cool. Right?” I look over at Jongho and Yeosang giving them the look of “Please say yes” then he looks over at my brother and nods “Yes, of course I’ll still think you’re cool. You don’t have to do something dangerous in order for it to be cool.”

 My little brother wipes his tear ridden eyes “Really?” Jongho nods “Yes, of course. Remember that trick Seonghwa showed you earlier that you got right away? You should show your sister.” My little brother looks over at Yeosang who was holding a ball then he gives my brother a reassuring nod. He gently throws the ball over at my brother and he kicks the ball making it over the branch of a tree behind them. Immediately both men cheer for my brother and I look over at him with a very impressed look on my face. “Wow, your aim is really good now..” My little brother nods and puts his hands on his waist looking very proud “Thank you..”  

After consoling my brother, I walk around to look for that San guy I was talking to but I couldn’t see him anywhere. I walk around the town square to see if maybe he’d wandered off there but nothing, it wasn’t until I was walking home I hear a faint low voice then some giggling shortly after. 

I noticed the voices were coming from the side of a fountain so I didn’t think much of it and continue walking until I hear “Sannie, stop that tickles!” causing me to halt in my tracks and feel a pit in my stomach. Unfortunately curiosity got the best of me and I walk over and peek behind one of the pillars of the fountain only to see San pinning a girl against it having a very intense makeout session that if anyone saw something similar would definitely guess they’re on the brink of coitus. Yeah no. That should have stayed a curiosity. 

I start walking away and let out a soft sigh with the pit in my stomach still feeling funny. Who would have thought that guy with such a sweet smile was a player? Actually you know what? I’m not surprised. Pirates are known to have many children scattered everywhere so I should have expected this in all honesty. 

The rest of the guys are probably the same including Hongjoong and Seonghwa, I mean they are men after all. Very good looking ones at that but for all I know some of them are probably married. Wait, wait, why am I even upset about this? Why am I even thinking about this? I don't even know the guy, this is ridiculous. He could bang all the girls he wants for all I care, I guess looks are deceiving.

Three days pass by since the pirates came by our village and every single one of those days Hongjoong and Seonghwa would stop by during my breaks in training to hang out which was kind of weird to me since I wasn’t used to all of this since my friends would never even want to talk about my training much less come visit me while I was actually practicing especially when I would practice with my gun, they’d always complain over how loud it was. 

Today was different though they didn’t even show up during my second break today which was unfortunate but they’re probably busy considering Hongjoong is the captain of a massive ship and Seonghwa is his right hand man so something must have come up. So when the sun was close to set now and I begin walking home I hear leaves rustling and to my surprise it’s the Captain himself only this time it was just him. “Hey Captain, it’s nice seeing you. Where’s Seonghwa?” He slowly walks over to me and I notice he has something in his hand, not a weapon of any sort it was an hourglass.

It was an hourglass with a beautiful golden frame and the sand being as pure white as the shore’s it was beautiful but I wonder why he has it with him. “Well, I came to talk to you.” Talk to me? With that expression honestly I’m wondering what exactly he’ll be talking to me about since he’s so serious. It’s probably not a good thing which is making me really nervous and hesitant to even ask. “Sure what is it? Is there something wrong?” 

He extends his hand and gives me the hourglass “When the sand runs out, we will be gone. You have until then to decide if you want to come with us if you want to get back at the Saitor Empire for what they did to Eledonia.” My stomach drops and suddenly I feel cold. This is exactly what I was dreading, having to choose between staying here and leaving. I look down at the trickling sand then back up at him and let out a sigh “We’ll be waiting here by the shore, where I first saw you.” I nod then he walks away disappearing into the forest and the first thing I instinctively do is my eyes well up with tears, this is it. I have to make my choice, choose my destiny.

 Am I going to be training forever and never get that bastard back or am I going to put my training to good use and finally make an example of that man? I walk home with tears in my eyes knowing the answer and what I must do, mostly so that my family and my village can live a good life at the expense of me risking mine.

 I go straight to my corner of the room and begin to pack my things that’s when my grandfather comes into the room and looks at the hourglass then shifts his gaze over at me packing my things while crying in silence then he decides to speak “I know you’ll do well my little Metztli, you’ll bring us justice. You’ll bring your grandmother justice and all the other people that we lost during those years thanks to those greedy men.”  

That’s when I finally break down and begin to cry my eyes out and hug my grandfather tightly “I’m scared grandpa, I’m scared I’ll let everyone down and I’m scared of not ever being able to see you guys again.”

He hugs me tight for a few seconds then pulls away with his arms on my shoulders “Sweetheart, you’ll see us one day this is not a goodbye but a see you later. In case my body ever decides it can no longer stay alive, just remember I’ll watch over you. I’ll never leave your side, ever. Your family will be here, your fellow clansmen will be here waiting for your victorious return.” 

He lifts my chin up to meet his eyes and says “Be the lethal soldier I’ve trained and make those people remember Eledonia, because staying here means you quit.” Teary eyed and more calm I nod then he smiles and gently pats my cheek and pushes a strand of hair behind my ear “That’s my little girl, the strong little Metztli.” I keep hearing that word “strong” but I honestly don’t feel like it. I feel weak. How could people see someone so strong when I see the weakest person on Earth for being so distraught over this. 

After talking to my family about my final decision my family along with the Chief decide they will send me off. When we arrive at the shore I see the massive ship whose flag proudly displayed was that of a skull inside of an hourglass. This was it.

Hongjoong stands at the top of the ramp and gives me a welcoming smile. I turn to my mom and give her a tight hug, one that lasts for quite a bit until my mom pulls away gently cupping my cheek “If you ever want to come back home we’ll be here sweetheart. Please take care of yourself, and remember we love you.” My mom's eyes well up with tears and I hug her again gently kissing her cheek.

 I look over at my dad who was intently staring at the ship and doesn’t move one bit until I finally say “Hey dad, I’m going now. Take care of mom, grandpa and my brothers.” My dad clears his throat and nods “Yeah, of course Metztli I’ll do that. You go ahead and have fun..” Although my father and I’s relationship has been strained for years I feel like I need to grow some balls and hug him because I never know when I’ll be able to see him again so I reach over and give my dad a tight hug. From the corner of my eyes and judging from the body language he awkwardly hugs me back. When I pull back my dad gives me a reassuring nod whilst still feeling awkward from the hug. I could tell he didn’t hate it though, he just struggles to show he cares.

 Up next I look at my grandpa who was looking at me with a fond smile then gives me a tight hug gently kissing my cheek. Once my grandpa pulls away from the hug he reaches into his pocket and pulls out a beautiful sea blue ring, puts it on the palm of my hand and closes it tightly. “It was your grandmother’s, it’ll protect you. She’ll be with you.” 

I smile and kiss my grandpa’s cheek and put the ring on my ring finger. Grandpa then pulls out a bundle that was strapped behind his back “Do me a favor and return these to the Captain and his friend. I’ve refurbished them and cleaned them up.” Their weapons, the ones they threw into the river. How did my grandpa know about it? Hongjoong must have told him when they were talking a few days ago. “Of course grandpa. I’ll let them know.” When I look over at the Chief he gives me a nod of approval and a smile.

From there, I begin to walk up the ramp to the ship until I feel a tug at my shirt. When I turn around I see it was both of my brothers “You forgot about us..” I bite the inside of my cheek and shake my head “Of course not, I just didn’t want you two to see your big sister cry is all..” I pull them both in for a hug gently patting their heads with one hand each. When I pull back the youngest of my brothers says “Grandpa told me and brother why you're leaving, don’t die please. Come back so you can see my tricks again when i’m better.” 

I give my youngest brother a smile and nod “Of course kiddo, I promise I won’t die…” My brothers give me one last hug again and run back down the ramp and into my mother’s arms. The closer I get to the top the harder it gets to take a step. Once on top the ramp is collapsed back into the ship and the ship begins to set sail. I walk over to the railing and wave goodbye to my family until they decide to go back home. That’s when Hongjoong puts a hand on my shoulder and says “I know it was a hard decision but I promise you’ll see them again.”

 I silently nod and he continues “Do you want Wooyoung to prepare you something? Are you hungry? Perhaps tea?” I shake my head and stare the now empty shore of Eledonia “I’ll stay here.” He gently squeezes my shoulder “I’ll get Seonghwa to come show you to your room a little later when you’re done okay?” In a barely audible voice I reply with “Yes Captain.” And there I sat in silence watching Eledonia until I could no longer keep my eyes open.

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If I catch anyone plagiarizing my work just be warned I don't play with that kind of stuff so don't try me..

Next Chapter

[the-himawari]

A3! Tsukioka Tsumugi - Translation [N] Sunny Blanc

*Please read disclaimer on blog

---

Tsumugi: I’m home.

Azuma: Welcome back. What a beautiful flower you have there.

Tasuku: Did you go to the flower shop again today?

Tsumugi: I still have my subscription, after all.

Hisoka: That one where you can buy one flower a day, right?

Homare: Has the flower shop’s subscription piqued your interest as well, Hisoka-kun?

Hisoka: I’d be interested if there was a marshmallow subscription.

Tsumugi: Fufu, it would be great if there was a marshmallow subscription out there.

Guy: The flowers Tsukioka receives everyday are nice and bright.

Azuma: They’re pretty and cheer you up.

Tsumugi: I’m happy if you say so too. Anyways, this came to me at the flower shop earlier… But we create and receive bouquets in our upcoming show, don’t we? To prepare for our roles, how about we take requests from the other members and actually try making bouquets ourselves?

Homare: Hm, so you are going to something like a bouquet specialty store, so to say.

Tasuku: The role I play doesn’t make nor receive any bouquets… But, well, I guess that’s fine.

Guy: We must make them while considering our budget.

Tsumugi: Ah, that’s true. This role study might get pretty pricey depending on the case.

Azuma: Leave that to me.

Tsumugi: Eh, but…

Hisoka: If Azuma says so, then it’ll be fine.

Tsumugi: …Alright, we’ll count on you then.

Azuma: Fufu, no problem.

-pause-

*knock, knock*

Tsumugi: Come in.

*door opens*

Itaru: Morn’.

Tsumugi: Good morning, Itaru-kun. What’s the matter?

Itaru: The thing is… sorry this is so sudden, but I’d like you to make a bouquet, Tsumugi.

Tsumugi: A bouquet…?

Itaru: I have to bring one for a client tonight, but I’ve been working so much overtime lately it totally slipped my mind. I doubt I’ll have time to go to a flower shop today either… So can I ask you to do me this favour?

Tsumugi: You’ve been busy these days, huh, Itaru-kun… I don’t have my tutoring job today. If you’re alright with me, then I’ll take care of it.

Itaru: For reals? I owe you my life…! Seriously, thanks.

Tsumugi: Fufu, you’re welcome.

Itaru: Btw, the recipient’s a guy. It’s for his retirement celebration.

Tsumugi: If it’s for a retirement celebration, then I’m thinking yellow, orange, and green for the colours.

Itaru: You have such a strong grasp on this stuff, huh?

Tsumugi: I just learned it naturally since I love flowers. By the way, is there a colour you’d like to include, Itaru-kun? Like a colour that the retiree evokes…

Itaru: Umm, blue?

Tsumugi: Blue, huh…

Itaru: Is that colour a bust?

Tsumugi: Ah, not at all! That’s not what I meant… I’ll give it a try.

Itaru: As long as you don’t force yourself. Err, crap. I gotta get going… It’s on the way, so I’ll drop by the dorm in the evening to pick up the bouquet.

Tsumugi: Alright, I’ll prepare it by then. (If it’s for a retirement, then I suppose positive flower language would be fitting.) (There’s not many blue flowers in the first place, so I have to go search as soon as possible.)

-pause-

Tsumugi: (I’m glad I found find the perfect flowers for the occasion.) (I also purchased the wrapping paper and ribbon, so let’s make the bouquet right away.) (It’s a bit drab with only blue flowers, so I’ll add some brightly-coloured ones too… After aligning the lengths, bundle it into a bouquet shape and wrap it up… there.) (Decorate it with a ribbon and place it in a special bouquet bag…) Yay, finished!

-pause-

Tsumugi: Here’s the bouquet you requested.

Itaru: Thanks. You seriously saved me. The bouquet’s beautiful. I’m sure he’ll absolutely love it.

Tsumugi: Fufu, I’m glad I could help.

Itaru: Ah, sorry. I’m in a rush, so I’ll thank you later.

Tsumugi: Sure, take care. (I hope he enjoys the bouquet.)

-pause-

Itaru: I’m back.

Tsumugi: Ah, Itaru-kun. Welcome home.

Itaru: Tsumugi, I seriously owe you for today. He totally loved it. He was saying it was flashy, pretty, and he was impressed with the rare blue flowers.

Tsumugi: Really? That’s great.

Itaru: Ah, right. Here… I got some baked sweets from the client, so I’ll share my loot with you.

Tsumugi: Eh? You’re the one who received them, Itaru-kun. You don’t need to give me this many…!

Itaru: Nope, this isn’t even enough to cover how much you helped me. I’m gonna thank you properly with something else later. So just take this as a token of my appreciation for now.

Tsumugi: …Alright. I’ll take them gratefully then.

---

[actiniumwrites]

Hiii, actinium! Truly thank you for letting me send an entry still and also big congrats on hitting 1k yourself! It's much deserved for sure! :3

Name: Dust

About Me/Personality:

I'm an introvert through and through. My mbti is INFJ.

I have always been the shy and quiet girl my entire life and I need people to come to me when they want to get to know me because, oh lord, I'm horrible at making the first move.

I unfortunately can sometimes be a bit stubborn and have a hard time accepting things or seeing my own mistake. Comes from being a huge perfectionist. This also comes with always being a hard working and having a tendency to overwork myself because I realize way too late when I'm exhausted and in need of a break.

Generally I'd say I always try to see the good in people and love hanging out with them, but social interaction can quickly exhaust me too and I will need some time to recharge my social batteries. This isn't so much the case for people I'm really close to though. Around those I'm comfortable with I'm not too shy to let out a bit of my crazier side. I love goofing around with friends and loved ones and I can be quite sarcastic. Shamelessly admitting that I love dad jokes and can crack one or two here and there at times.

My self-confidence never has been the highest and I generally get a bit nitpicky about myself at times.

I'm often pretty busy so my partner will have to be able to deal with that.

My love language is physical touch all the way. I'm in need of many hugs. I also love sleeping in together while cuddling.

Hobbies/Passions: I love gaming, drawing, writing, reading, cooking/baking and gardening.

Some things you like and dislike:

I like: Reliability, honesty, politeness, punctuality (I really really hate it when people are too late), small acts of love that show me that the other person thinks of me even if they're busy (e.g. bringing me a drink, leaving me a note etc.), people with a good sense or humor and some goofyness.

I dislike: Pretty much the opposites of everything I mentioned above, as well as people who never take anything I say serious, condescending people, unnecessary drama or being pulled into drama

Your ideal date:

Just hanging out, watching TV/reading books is nice. I also love cuddling without needing many words or depending on my mood initiating some deep talk or discussing about things. Or literally just spending time in the same room, knowing the other one is there while each one is doing their work (practically being alone together, if that makes sense)

Gender of Character: Male

I think that is pretty much it! this has gotten pretty long now haha, oops sorry! thank you again for making an exception. I'm looking forward who you're going to match me with! :3

I MATCH YOU WITH . . .

ZHONGLI!

TROPE: STRANGERS TO LOVERS

it was a rather warm night when you met zhongli for the first time. there was a calming breeze and a slight spray of the ocean drifting through the harbor

you were sat against a bench, in a more quiet part of the harbor where only a few citizens lingered. nevertheless, it was your favorite part of the city

the flowers that surrounded the area made it all the more peaceful, alongside the trees that rattled every now and then with the breeze

suddenly, your peace was intruded upon by a rather tall stranger, with beautiful brown hair and the kindest looking eyes you had ever seen

“ah, it has truly been awhile since i’ve been over here. many years ago, this was my favorite corner of the city. one of the only places i’ve been able to find true peace.”

you didn’t say anything in response, too startled by his sudden presence. yet, for some reason, you couldn’t bring yourself to send him away

and so, you allowed him to stay

eventually, you learned his name was zhongli and how he worked at the funeral parlor, along with a million other details, of course. there was something oddly calming about him, almost like the night around you

although you didn’t speak much, it was okay with him. zhongli spent the entire night talking to you, and as the night passed on, you began to speak with him more and more too

a few hours prior, you would have never spoken to him in your life. you could’ve never guessed the man sitting in front of you now would become your partner for life

[maeumsim]

i'm feeling defeated about a lot of things in my life lately (but mainly my career), can you recommend any poems/quotes/anything with words of encouragement? i don't want to give up, but i deeply feel "why bother?"

hi anon 🦋 I deeply relate to ur words even though our circumstances r probably very different. I’ve been in an awful place lately and it’s only two days ago that I decided that I would get my life together even if I didn’t want to live it. Looking for quotes to bring u some comfort ended up comforting me in return by reminding me of things I believe in. So I want to thank you and I truly hope reading all those poems and quotes make you feel somewhat better. You ask “why bother?” and there are thousands of things I could say to contradict you but I simply want to as you in return: “why not?”

Your Shadow Invents You Every Time Light Fails to Pass Through You by Michael Wasson (Listen, my love. This year is just a visitor & next year’s / ghost. Take care of it because yes—yes, you do deserve flowers for once / in your life.)

Snowdrops by Louise Glück (afraid, yes, but among you again / crying yes risk joy / in the raw wind of the new world.)

Instructions on Not Giving Up by Ada Limón (Fine then, / I’ll take it, the tree seems to say, a new slick leaf / unfurling like a fist to an open palm, I’ll take it all.)

The Thing Is by Ellen Bass (to love life, to love it even / when you have no stomach for it)

The Letter by Linda Gregg (I’m not feeling strong yet, but I am taking / good care of myself)

Letters To a Young Poet by Rainer Maria Rilke (“Believe in a love that is being stored up for you like an inheritance, and have faith that in this love there is a strength and a blessing so large that you can travel as far as you wish without having to step outside it.” and “I beg you, to have patience with everything unresolved in your heart and to try to love the questions themselves as if they were locked rooms or books written in a very foreign language. Don’t search for the answers, which could not be given to you now, because you would not be able to live them. And the point is to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps then, someday far in the future, you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer.”)

Tiny Beautiful Things: Advice on Love and Life from Dear Sugar by  Cheryl Strayed

Ask Polly: ‘I’m Broke and Mostly Friendless, and I’ve Wasted My Whole Life’

Ask Polly: Help, I'm The Loneliest Person In The World! (”You are young and you are learning how to live”)

Ask Polly: Why Should I Keep Going? (” You are not lost. You are here. Stop abandoning yourself.”)

“Ask Polly: Is Life All Downhill From Here?” (“Stop cringing — at your future, at your failure, at yourself in the mirror — and stand up and look directly at who you are. Not who you should’ve been, but who you are now. Let that person in. Let her be as mediocre and wrong and shameful and sad and miserable and brilliant and hilarious as she wants to be, because she knows exactly what you need to feel good. She has plans for you. She wants to show you what comes next. She wants to take you into the future you’re dreading and say, “See? You never would’ve imagined this.”)

[plaid-shirtsandvibranium-arms]

Nemesis: Retribution (4)

Summary: 10 years after the Avengers had left you for dead during a mission gone wrong, you unexpectedly re-enter their lives. Wholly unrecognizable from the person they used to know and now with a new team behind you, they ask for your help to stop a chain of syndicates who were manufacturing and peddling the super soldier serum. You were determined to say no until the chance at the vengeance you had been chasing for years was added to the offer.

Fandoms: Avengers, Marvel, MCU, The Punisher, Daredevil

Pairings: Female Reader x (Frank Castle, Billy Russo, Matt Murdock, Steve Rogers, Bucky Barnes, Pietro Maximoff)

Warnings: EXPLICIT SMUT. SHAMELESS SEXUAL BEHAVIOUR (18+ ONLY. I WILL BLOCK YOU), voyeurism, exhibitionism, authority kink, praise kink, spanking, slight dom themes, polyamorous relationships, reverse harem, blatant disregard for canon timelines and events, angst, Punisher canon level of violence and gore, strong language, mentions of trauma, mentions of character death, fluff if you squint, 

A/N: Slowing it down just a bit to move plot along. Freaking out on the reblogs and comments are encouraged and will be rewarded with cookies. Seriously though, I love hearing what you guys think and use some of it to make the next chapters better. I adore you all! Have at it!

No permission is granted to repost, steal, or translate my work. Not even a credit makes it okay. Tumblr is the only place I post my writing. If you see it anywhere else please report it.

Series Masterlist | Full Masterlist

1:4 Apple Crumble

Steve Rogers had kindly offered for you and your team to stay at the Compound. For however long this mission would take, you were all going to start running straight at it early tomorrow. In terms of the mission, he was relieved to have your help. The sooner the serum was out of circulation the better and they truthfully did need your help. This underground world was more your scene now and you could better navigate it.

On a personal level, he was glad that you were sticking around even if it was on a contract. He would take whatever opportunity he can and make the best of it. That's how he's always been and he wasn't going to change that now.

He told himself that it was because he was the Captain that he was at your door this late after you all had agreed to part for the night. It was out of consideration that he carried with him some of his own clothes to offer you in case you needed something to change into. It was out of a need to clear the tension with you now that you were going to work as a team again that he was knocking on your door.

That was all.

You opened the door a moment later wrapped only in a short towel and with your hair still dripping wet from the shower. The smile that rose on your face was sly as you leaned on the doorframe with your arms crossed and your hip cocked to one side. He swallowed.

Maybe that wasn't all.

"What can I do for you, Cap?"

He opened his mouth, but no words came out. He was far too distracted by the little droplet that rolled down from your temple to the valley of your breasts. He shook his head and cleared his throat, forcing himself to focus only on your eyes and not the inappropriate answers that sprung to mind at your question.

"I brought you a change of clothes in case you need it," he managed to say. "And I wanted to talk to you if you're not too tired."

You opened the door wider and took the clothes from him without a word, turning into the room toward the bathroom. You casually dropped your towel to the floor and Steve choked at the sight of your bare back, a small set of black panties the only stitch you wore. The breath in his chest released only when you disappeared into the bathroom, the door cracked open offering him enticing glimpses as you moved around.

Steve hurriedly closed the door behind him and as he made his way further in, he caught sight of an open go bag beside your bed with clothes clearly visible. There was also a shirt and sweats beside it, the design he knew belonged to Pietro. He felt a little embarrassed. Of course Pietro would have already beaten him to it and that your team always came prepared. Still there was a satisfaction that bloomed in him when you stepped out clad in his shirt, the hem barely reaching mid thigh and bare feet soundlessly crossing the carpeted floor until you came to sit with him on the sofa. You tucked your legs under you and rested your head on your hand over the back of the seat.

"Gotta say I like this look, Steve," you grinned at him.

He chuckled, self-consciously rubbing at his beard and pulling at the hair at the back of his collar. The light dusting of red on his cheeks didn't go unnoticed by you.

"What? You don't like the all American apple pie look?"

You hummed and took a leisurely look at him from head to toe. Rugged and imposing as he appeared, the heat on his face intensified at your obvious appreciation and the way you swiped your tongue along your bottom lip. You were biting your lip when your eyes met his again, trying to stop yourself from laughing at how flustered he was getting and how much you were enjoying it. You've always found Steve handsome and he made apple pie look damn good, but this look on him was just so dangerously delicious.

You had a type.

"I'm more of an apple crumble kind of girl. I like the texture better," you winked. "And I don't mind a little beard burn."

"Will your team mind that I'm talking to you without one of them here?"

You raised an eyebrow and held his unsteady gaze, clearly understanding he meant more than just your professional relationship with the three men.

"You're curious."

"It's none of my business. That's not what I came to talk to you about," he stammered, unaccustomed to how forward you were.

"What did you want to talk about then?"

"I wanted to apologize properly and thank you for agreeing to help."

You groaned and threw your whole body back on the seat, causing Steve's shirt to ride up just shy of completely flashing him. You sat back up and pinched the bridge of your nose, letting out a long breath. It was only the fact that it was Steve that you were even entertaining this conversation.

"You have nothing to apologize for, Steve," you firmly dismissed.

"I do, Nem. We all do."

"Fine. List down what you're sorry about. Let's go through it one by one or we can draw lots to make it interesting."

"Nem," he said, low and clear with warning yet imploring you to listen. "Can you take this seriously for one second?"

The ever present smirk on your face dropped as you sighed heavily and ran a hand through your hair. For the first time since he's seen you, your expression softened a fraction and a shadow of the person he used to know passed across your features.

"Listen to me, Steve. I don't blame any of you. I'm not angry at any of you. I honestly have no room for more anger even if I wanted to be."

In the beginning you were. There were days while you were getting tortured that you hated them while you pleaded to the heavens for them to rescue you. It had taken a decade and three incredible men for that inferno of fury to turn into a manageable bitterness.

"Do you know how tiring it is to be so fucking angry all the time?" you chuckled darkly. "It took a while, but I learned to prioritize what I choose to be angry about."

"Salvacion," he muttered and you nodded, your eyes staring blankly forward.

"I've carried that name for a decade, Steve. That asshole has to die by my hands."

Steve saw now how selfish he was for forcing the conversation with the purpose of earning your forgiveness. It was for easing his own guilt that he was doing it when instead he should have just been thanking you for what you did and had to endure.

"Why didn't you ever come back?"

"I tried, Steve. When I was recovered enough I tried to go back. Did you know my sister had a girlfriend?"

He shook his head, throat suddenly closing at the sight of absolute misery in your eyes. He regretted starting this conversation even more.

"Jill. She was amazing to Lily and she was like a sister to me too," you smiled a little, not in your usual sarcastic way but with a hint of gentle fondness before your expression hardened once more.

"I saw her and I just couldn't bring myself to face her. I'm the reason the love of her life is dead. I couldn't, Steve"

It started off with the fear that they might have killed Jill too. You told yourself you had to know, but truthfully you were trying desperately to find a connection to Lily. You found her visiting the graveyard, laying flowers on two stones and spending the afternoon sitting on the ground tearfully talking to the dead. The shame burned through you and from then on you made it your sole purpose to destroy the man who took Lily from you both. Until then you had no right to face her. You had no right to return to the life you once knew.

Steve noticed that you weren't crying although the look in your eyes was swimming with grief. He expected you to cry, but somehow seeing you with dry eyes only made you look more in pain. You only clenched your fists, your shoulders tense and your jaw stiff. Steve decided he would tell the others instead of having you go through this conversation again.

He would do that for you.

You woke up surprisingly refreshed the following morning, strangely lighter than you have felt in the past decade. You didn't expect for that talk with Steve to have such an impact on you. You smiled ruefully, remembering your many counseling sessions with Curtis before and that maybe you were finally seeing his point.

FRIDAY had directed you to the larger conference room for today's briefing session with the rest of the team. You were wearing another one of Steve's shirts paired with your usual cargo pants, a fact that didn't go unnoticed judging by the raised eyebrows and teasing smiles. Billy in particular was leaning in to whisper to Matt what was going on.

"You don't have to tell me. I can smell it," Matt chuckles, crinkles visible at the edges of his dark sunglasses. "His cologne is quite distinct."

You smacked Billy on the arm, but laughed with them as well before throwing a wink at Steve who proceeded to blush a deep red. As you took your seat, a cup of coffee suddenly materialized in front of you accompanied by Pietro's ever bright smile. You smiled gratefully and took a sip, eyes slightly rounding in surprise at the taste.

"You remembered how I took my coffee."

"I've forgotten nothing about you, little star."

You haven't taken your coffee that way in so long. It's been just strong plain black coffee lately, the lack of sugar and cream where you lived with the boys being a factor. It had seemed pointless to eat something sweet when there was a permanent sour taste in your mouth from life. Now though you couldn't seem to help taking one sip after another, licking your lips before going in for more.

Right now this tasted right.

You didn't notice that Billy was smiling adoringly at you and sharing a look of approval with Frank as the briefing began, happy that someone aside from him was spoiling you. You certainly didn't know that Matt was smirking because he heard your heart literally skip a beat at the sweet gesture.

It took hours for the meeting to wrap up, but there was still more to do before you could actually take action. A number of the Avengers were sent out to gather more intel while the rest would stay to make further preparations.

"I only really need to talk to Frank a bit more," Steve said as he approached your group. "Why don't we have Pietro show you guys around the Compound? There are some improvements I think you'll find interesting."

Your tour guide for the afternoon appeared beside you, taking your hand in his and bouncing on the balls of his feet in his excitement. He was just too cute that you couldn't help but let out a small smile. The effect he had on you remained it seems.

"A tour would be really helpful for me," Matt easily agreed.

"And I go wherever the pretty girl goes," Billy added, slinging his arm over your shoulders.

"Great. Surrender your weapons and you should be good to go," Steve asked with a pointed look at both you and Billy who groaned in answer.

Billy was ready with a string of complaints and counter arguments when the clang of metal on the glass conference table stunned him into silence. He watched in complete disbelief as you removed every gun and blade attached to your body, efficiently dismantling them and lining them up on the table.

"Is she?" Matt murmured, leaning closer to Billy.

"Yeah."

"All of them?"

"Yeah."

By the time you stepped back, there was practically a decent sized armory on the table. How and where you managed to fit all of it on your person was a mystery to them.

"You missed one," Billy said, snapping out of his daze.

He stepped in front of you and casually slipped his arm up the front of your shirt and under your sports bra. His fingers grazed unnecessarily close to your now hardened nipples and he simply winked when you raised an eyebrow at him. Billy pulled out two small throwing daggers soon after and placed them alongside your other weapons.

"Oh yeah. I keep forgetting about those," you chuckled.

"Do you always come armed to the teeth?" Bucky snapped, clearly bothered by the display.

"She doesn't want her team to carry extra ammo for her, Sergeant," Billy scowled at him, the obvious animosity surprising Bucky. When he turned back to Pietro, his expression was back to his usual playful one. "So how about that tour?"

Frank turned to Steve when you had exited the room. "You gotta teach me that trick, Cap."

"What trick?"

"First time in 10 years I've seen her take any kind of order without a knife fight first," he said, cracking a smile and shaking his head.

It turns out that coming back was doing some good for you and this made him more comfortable around the Avengers. He wasn't about to braid them friendship bracelets but he was less inclined to pop a cap in their ass. At least for the time being.

Walking around the Compound brought back some of that wonder you felt when you first stepped in, but it recalled everything you had lost. Sensing the sudden tension in you, Billy gripped you by the waist and pulled you into his side. He kissed your temple, a silent reminder of what you had gained.

Pietro had been an absolute sweetheart, specifically describing what was in the area for Matt's benefit and pointing out the changes to you. The training area was your last stop, the place you had spent the most time in during your short stint here. There were loud sounds coming from the area and walking in you saw fresh-faced recruits in paired off sparring sessions.

Your full attention was on Pietro as he happily listed off the new features and answered questions from Matt and Billy, the latter now in businessman mode as he thought of what he could implement for Anvil. You were having an unusually pleasant time until a familiar shrill voice demanded your attention.

"Well look what the street cat dragged in. Y/N?"

You knew that voice. A decade with torture and trauma included apparently couldn't change how much her voice grated at you. The cold smirk made a reappearance on your face as you slowly turned to face her, the three men with you were instantly alarmed at the change in your demeanor.

"Kim," you nodded.

"Thought you were dead."

"Thanks. Can't say I thought about you at all though."

"I see you're still pathetically clinging to Pietro."

"What can I say? He's really cute," you said with a wink at Pietro who seemed to enjoy the compliment.

She sneered at you, her irritation rising when you weren't backing down like you used to do. She couldn't quite put her finger on what had changed about you, but you seemed rougher around the edges and far too cocky for her liking. Luckily, she still remembered a sure-fire way to take you down a few pegs.

"I'm teaching a class on hand to hand combat. How about we show them a demonstration on what a real fight looks like?"

You giggled as your smile grew, a disturbing sight that made even Kim doubt herself for a moment. You nodded your head in easy acceptance and she looked like she was pleased at herself for getting this opportunity. Before you could step forward though, you found Matt's walking stick blocking your path.

"What? It's not assault if it's provoked," you grinned at the frown on his face.

He hated it when you found loopholes, but he relented with a heavy sigh. He was too used to this. He leaned toward Pietro and told him that he should inform the Captain.

"Get some snacks too, roadrunner," Billy chuckled, delightedly watching you strip off your shirt and walking confidently towards Kim on the sparring mats.

Pietro had returned a moment later after completing his task, actually handing Billy a bag of fresh popcorn. The smile on his face froze when he caught sight of your bare skin. So far all he had seen as evidence of your torture was what was visible on your neck and face. He had stupidly brushed that fact aside, too excited to have found you again. Now the vicious marring on your beautiful skin was a cruel reminder of their failure as your team. They had failed you.

He had failed you.

Back in the conference room, the same feelings were shared by two super soldiers. They had pulled up surveillance on the training area after Pietro's message, just in time to see you take off that shirt.

Bucky felt the air leave his lungs at the horrific sight. He was alive and you had paid a heavy price for saving him. He could barely keep his eyes on you, the shame burning through him. He didn't want to imagine the amount of pain you had to endure to sustain those injuries.

"Don't you people dare look at her with pity," Frank warned. "Those scars are a testament to her strength. She's damn beautiful."

Steve agreed. He'd caught a glimpse of your scars last night and jarring as they were, your complete lack of self consciousness to them just made you more alluring. Looking back at the screen though he was concerned that you could hurt yourself. Kim was a top agent now, high enough in the ranks to be training recruits and leading missions. She had proven herself deadly in combat, but the way you were grinning was chilling in itself.

"One question before we start," you said.

"What?" Kim scoffed, flipping her braided hair over her shoulder.

"When's your next mission?"

"2 weeks. Why?" she answered, perfect brow raised in confusion.

"Just calculating your recovery time," you shrugged. "I'm nice that way."

Kim predictably charged at you then, growling and cursing at you under her breath. You smirked, standard SHIELD movements were easy to read for you. You stayed completely still and relaxed in your stance as she lunged at you with her fist. You timed your movement precisely, sidestepping at the absolute last moment. One hand grabbed at the back of her head, forcing it down to ram against your oncoming fist with a sickening crack.

Broken nose.

Kim shrieked in pain as the blood gushed from her nose and she tried to pull away from you. You didn't let her. You pulled her down by the shoulder to bend her over before driving your knee up her midsection. She wheezed at the impact, the mat below her smattered with her blood.

Bruised ribs. Maybe slightly broken.

You unceremoniously threw her aside, letting her fall groaning on her side. You clicked your tongue, watching her struggle and turning to the class she was supposed to be teaching.

"Lesson 1, kids," you waved your hands in Kim's general direction. "Don't end up like that."

Broken ego.

You turned to go back to your boys when the glint of metal caught your eye. You tilted your head just in time for the dagger to zip past your eye line, only thinly scratching at your cheek. Your hands reacted on instinct, reaching for the small hidden pocket along the waistband of you pants. You flicked the thin blade with deft fingers, embedding on the mat and landing it purposely close to Kim's eyes that it cut through her fake lashes.

"Nem!" Steve's unmistakable voice boomed through the speakers. You had forgotten that they had FRIDAY everywhere. "We said no weapons."

You rolled your eyes and smiled cheekily at the cameras. "It's just a nail file. I don't like keeping blood under my nails."

"You call that training?" Steve groaned rubbing his eyes and turning to Frank.

"I call that anger management," Frank said, amused at how unpredictable to handle they already found you when they've barely scratched the surface. He noticed how Bucky looked furious, his metal hand clutching a little too hard onto the table. "Don't like what you see, Sarge?"

Bucky didn't answer. He didn't tell them that he didn't like what he saw because he knew he was a major contributor in what caused it. If only he had been kinder, gentler, more honest. Maybe things would have turned out differently.

He walked down the hallways much later gripping a first aid kit in his metal hand and nervously running the other through his cropped hair. The cut on your face was barely anything, but he needed an excuse to talk to you. He was afraid you would turn him away, but he was terrified that you wouldn't. He didn't know what to say to you. He didn't know how to begin to apologize for everything he's done. His palm grew sweaty and beads were beginning to form on his brow.

He was only a few steps away from your bedroom door and he was sorely tempted to turn back around when he noticed that it was cracked open and he could hear voices from inside. He should have followed his instinct to keep his distance but a high whine that definitely came from you pushed him to peak through the small opening.

What he saw made his already thumping heartbeat grow quicker. His eyes grew wide and his throat went dry. Whatever he was expecting, it definitely wasn't this.

You. Stark naked. Grinding your mound on someone's face.

You looked absolutely glorious as you wound your hips in your chase for release; head thrown, back arched, and lips in a dreamy smile. The view he had of you, facing him and deep into your pleasure, was enough to cause his pants to tighten. He couldn't see which one of your teammates was beneath you, the bedframe blocking his view. Whoever they were, Bucky was jealous. He wanted to taste you too.

He felt that stirring of longing again now as he watched you in the throes of passion with another man. He felt it the moment you stepped back into their lives. He felt it during the 10 years they thought you were dead. And he felt it when you were still in training as a recruit every time you smiled at Pietro and Steve.

You picked up your pace and he could see muscular arms reach up to grip your waist and pull you down harder. You were panting curses, your breathing turning erratic and Bucky could see your thighs begin to shake. The sight of you coming undone has to be the most entrancing thing he's ever seen.

Movement from you and your partner pulled him from the hypnosis caused by your erotic display. His face heated up, deeply embarrassed at having watched you for so long and finding enjoyment in basically violating your privacy. He was about to leave when the man whose face you had been riding, came up to kneel behind you.

He pulled your hips back against his own, sliding his hard length easily into your dripping cunt causing you to moan so deliciously that Bucky felt a shiver run down his spine. You reached your hand up to grip the back of his head, letting him bury his own in your neck as he set a languid pace with his thrusts.

Your head rolled to the side and your eyes opened, locking directly with Bucky's. You smirked and reached down to circle your swollen bud, pressing your back further against the hard body rutting behind you and purposely putting on a show. You winked at him.

He bolted out of there.

"That wasn't very nice, honey," the low voice was thick with lust in your ear. His breathing was growing labored too, finding your heat wrapping around him overwhelming.

"I don't see you stopping, Captain."

"How can I when you're gripping me so tight?" He snapped his hips earning a sharp moan from you. "Did you like that? Torturing my best pal with me balls deep inside you?"

You sighed and closed your eyes. Apple pie Steve wouldn't have whispered such sinful things to you, but this Steve could make you cum with just filthy words alone.

"Yeah, you did. Look at you clenching and soaking my cock from having Bucky watch you. You like being bad to him, honey?"

A sudden smack to your ass had you snapping your eyes open. He chuckled into your neck, biting down hard on the juncture as he felt you gripping him even tighter.

"Answer," he growled, landing a harsher smack to your bottom.

"Yes! Yes, Captain, I did."

"Good. Will you be good for me now, honey? You caused a bit of trouble today." His thrusting was still slow, making sure you felt every ridge and vein with each stroke as he drove you into a stupor. "Will you be a good girl for your Captain now?"

"Yes, Captain."

He smirked against your skin, pleased at your compliance. He was reveling in the power he had over you. Frank had said that you never took orders without a fight, but here you were being so good for him. Pliable. Yielding. He was enjoying it.

He gathered your hair in one hand and pulled, your back arching beautifully and emphasizing where his cock was buried deep inside you. With each thrust his cock came out glistening with your slick. The image made him lose control, abruptly escalating his pace to rail feverishly into you.

He had you gasping and clutching at the sheets instantly, begging for him to go harder and push you over the edge. He bent over you and reached around to rub furiously at your throbbing clit.

"Cum like a good girl, honey. Cum around my cock," he commanded. "I wanna feel you fucking drown me."

You came, lights dancing in your eyes and your head empty of all thoughts aside from the pleasure that racked your body. He followed soon after with a loud grunt, the sensation of you fluttering around him too much to resist.

He fell on top of you, spent and satisfied. Your sweat and heavy breaths mingling together as you both tried to return back to the world. You liked the heavy feel of him on top of you, strangely finding comfort in the weight.

He dragged you with him when he rolled off you, spooning you and planting kisses on the back of your shoulders that had your skin tingling from his beard.

"When are you going to put him out of his misery?"

"When it stops being fun?" you chuckled.

Steve wasn't going to push the issue. He knew that it was up to you whether you forgave Bucky or not and when that would be. It would be on your own terms how things moved. Just like what happened between you two. He wasn't expecting it, but the heated argument about the injuries you inflicted on one of his best agents had somehow escalated into him spanking you and you growing wet from it.

Not that either of you were complaining.

You turned around in his arms to face him, looking up at him with a taunting smirk. "You sure your old heart can take being in a polyamorous relationship?"

He chuckled and pecked your lips before going back in for a much deeper kiss that had you swooning. When he pulled back, he was looking at you lovingly.

"I'm known for waiting too long about things like this. I lost my shot at you 10 years ago. I'm not missing out on you again."

His words were firm and genuine. He honestly thought that he would mind having to share you with several other men. He thought that he would feel jealous and possessive. Instead, he felt reassured. He knew that wherever and whenever he lacked, someone else would pick it up and he would be the same. There was a sense of relief knowing that you would always be taken cared of by people who felt the same for you as he did.

"Well then you have some making up to do for waiting so long," you said nibbling at his lower lip.

He groaned and grabbed your thigh, hitching your leg up on his hip. Your thighs and core were still sticky and slippery from both your releases. His tongue dove into your mouth and he could feel you moan against his lips as he ran the tip of his cock against your still sensitive core. Your nails dug into his back as he sunk in, fitting perfectly inside you.

"You're running with a super soldier now, honey," he said, eyes burning with want. "I can do this all day."

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A/N: Some asked about Jill and Kim so here you go, lovelies. Come freak out with me in the comments and reblogs. Thank you all for the support! More coming soon. 

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[pies-writes-and-more]

infatuation

word count: 1,779

pairing: Bokuto Kōtarō x Fem!Reader

warnings: maybe some swearing, a sad boi Bokuto but just for a bit promise haha also i haven’t fully proofread this so im sorry if it makes: no sense LOL 

a/n: i am falling more and more in love with this adorable himbo just look at him lol. This fic idea is honestly all thanks to @satan-ruler-of-hells​ because they are practically my muse in life so thank you satan ilysm <3 i hope you guys like it! Gif below is not mine - credits to the original creator!

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Bokuto knew from the very second he laid eyes on you that he would love you with every cell in his body. He finally understood what it meant to be infatuated with someone (Akaashi had told him just the other week about the English and Japanese words for infatuation and almost immediately, Bokuto knew that that was how he felt about you). He looked at you and felt like his whole life had led up to this moment.

He spent weeks trying to get on your good side, though you just laughed a little at him and awkwardly slid away. But just like most people, you couldn’t avoid his happy-go-lucky attitude forever. He always seemed to leave you alone if you truly wanted him to, but he bounced around you like a golden retriever, grinning from ear to ear. You knew that Bokuto had quite the reputation to go 110% for anything he wanted to, and so you weren’t that surprised when a bouquet showed up at your desk before school after weeks of him flirting with you.

The volleyball captain stood awkwardly in the doorframe of your classroom as you stared at the flowers, a glow to your skin as you gently touched the petals. You liked him - you liked how honest he was about his feelings, how unafraid he was to show you, you liked that he talked so highly about his team members, that he even told you about some kids at another school that he had mentored for a bit. You really liked him, even if maybe you weren’t as enthusiastic in your actions. You turned to look at him, a smile on your lips making him sigh from relief. He shot you a wink and started to come into the class before Akaashi dragged him away, saying he also had class to attend to. 

When Bokuto finally asked you out, confessing to you with a grin on his face, “I’m not sure if you’ve noticed but I really like you, Y/N-”

“Bokuto, you left presents for me every day this week and you’ve been screaming it across campus that you like me,” you pointed out with a laugh. “I think I noticed.”

Bokuto’s jaw had dropped but he still managed to pull off that wide grin of his, “Oh! Good! So you got my signals! Would you like to go out with me then? We can go anywhere you like!”

How could you say no to that adorable sweet smile?

Everyone was well aware that Bokuto was infatuated with you, he looked for you at each of his games, spun you around in tight hugs every time he saw you acting like it had been forever since he had last seen you, and you were the second most thought about topic on Bokuto’s mind (besides volleyball, of course).

He talked about you non-stop, sometimes enough to get on the Coach’s nerves and earn himself a few extra laps. 

“-and then after practice today I’m going to go study with her because I’ve got that math testing coming up and she said that she would help me and-”

“Bokuto, you come off real strong ya know that?” Konoha chuckled, shaking his head slowly as he picked up another ball to practice serving with.

Bokuto tilted his head slightly, trying to decipher what his teammate meant, “Strong? What do you mean?”

Konoha just glanced at the team and smiled a little awkwardly, “I mean... don’t you ever think what you’re doing is a lot?”

The captain considered these words for a moment, a furrow in his brow the more he concentrated, “But... how is she going to know how much I like her if I don’t show her?”

“Just be glad she isn’t feeling suffocated by all your over-the-top acts of love,” Akaashi piped in, though almost immediately regretted it. His eyes glanced over at Bokuto, seeing the quick droop in his hair and expression.

“Suffocated?” Boktuo repeated with wide sad eyes. Could it be possible that you didn’t actually want him to do all the things he was doing? Could you actually hate everything he was doing and wish he would be different?

Akaashi tried to insist to his best friend that you obviously liked his actions enough to go out with him so he probably didn’t have anything to worry about, but it all fell on deaf ears. But the next morning, Bokuto decided that if it meant keeping you next to him, he would change how he was.

The next day, you were surprised to find no Bokuto standing at your locker with a smile and an eager story about something that happened at practice. You hung around just for a few minutes longer, wondering if he got held up somewhere, but eventually just shrugged it off, assuming he and Akaashi were busy.

But even throughout morning classes, you didn’t get any text messages, no memes being sent through any social media platforms, no snapchats of his bored expression when he was clearly supposed to be learning.

Was... something wrong? You thought back to the last time you saw him, just before yesterday’s practice, when he had covered your face with kisses like he always did and beamed when you told him you’d see him tomorrow. “I can walk you home if you’d like!” He had offered.

“You’ve got practice in like 5 minutes, Bo,” you rolled your eyes with a smile. “I’ll be fine, don’t worry!”

He had shouted some compliments at you as you left making you laugh more as you waved goodbye to him.

Had something been wrong then too as you hadn’t noticed?

Bokuto seemed to be dodging you during break times. You’d see a flash of his dyed hair and by the time you got to where he last was, he had disappeared again.

Was he avoiding you? Was this his way of trying to break up with you? Your expression tightened into a frown - after just a few weeks, was Bokuto trying to ghost you in the most immature way possible? Sure, you knew he was childish and didn’t like to hurt people’s feelings too much, but you never expected him to try and disappear from your life like this.

You knew he had practice tonight so at the end of the day, you waited by the gym, awkwardly giving smiles and waves to his teammates as they walked in.

Soon, Bokuto’s eyes caught yours and he froze, looking around for some sort of escape. Your heart dropped just a little - so he really was trying to avoid you.

“H-Hi Y/N,” he smiled nervously, slowly walking towards you and trying to see if he could maybe slip past you.

“Are you trying to break up with me?” You demanded, searching his eyes for guilt or sadness, or any sort of emotion really.

But Bokuto just stared at you with shock, his head tilting the way it did when he was confused (which was often, to be honest), “W-What?”

“You’ve been avoiding me all day. And you didn’t come find me in the morning... or at lunch... and you haven’t texted me all day. It feels like you’re trying to run away from me,” as you spoke, you felt a bit of shame growing in you. Were you just being clingy? Were you overreacting for no reason? Maybe Bokuto was just busy today. Maybe he just needed space. Maybe you had gotten used to him being around you had started getting too clingy to him and he needed to get away from you. “If... If you needed space you could’ve just told me.”

“I don’t need space! I thought you did!” Bokuto gaped at you, reaching out for your hand but hesitating and pulling his arm back suddenly. “I thought... maybe you thought I was too much. Or suffocating you with how much I like you. I know you’re very independent so... I didn’t want to chase you away because I like you so much.”

“Suffocating me?” You repeated in surprise. You hadn’t ever really considered that. Sure, Bokuto came on strong but there was a sort of confidence in it that you really admired. You loved that he told you what he thought with barely a filter sometimes, you loved that he showed you all the time how much he loved you because you were honestly sure you were unlovable for a while. But where you felt like you were the darkness, he was a gleaming sort of light. A happiness that you never understood but always envied, a courage embedded in him that you wanted to get to know more and more, a gigantic heart that you could never understand how or why it chose you. “Bokuto, I am... completely infatuated with you.”

Bokuto watched you, his eyes getting bigger and bigger as the seconds passed. He knew that word (now in two languages) and he knew that was exactly how he felt about you. He grinned and quickly picked you up into a hug, squeezing you tightly, “I missed you so much today. Trying to keep away from you was the hardest thing I’ve ever done,” he whined, his smile not letting up the whole time.

You laughed and snuggled into his neck, squeezing him tightly, “Don’t go ignoring me like that ever again okay! I missed hearing from you all day. You’re the best part of my day,” you told him with a loving tap to his nose, making him beam all the more. 

“Never again! I promise! I’m much too infatuated with you to ever leave your side again, I swear!” he laughed, emphasizing his fancy new vocabulary and making you giggle. 

“Okay okay, go practice before you’re late. Then you can walk me home okay?” You told him and he jumped up excitedly, running off to make sure that practice went by quick so he got to be with you. You just watched him with all the love in your eyes, sitting in the gym and focusing on how he moved, how he soared, how powerful he was.

As practice went on, you couldn’t contain your laughter as Bokuto scolded Akaashi and Konoha for making him believe that he was too much and coming on too strong, insisting that you were the most perfect girl in the world so of course he had to show you how much he loved you.

His words just filled you up with so much joy, you could barely sit still. You were completely in love with Bokuto, but until you were ready for those words, infatuation really did seem to fit quite nicely.

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[choerypetal]

Home. Chishiya x Reader

Summary : Chishiya is having a fascination over the reader he thought he could get away from. Only to finding out she was the light to his darkness.

Warning : None (also english isn’t my first language, however I tried my best with grammar error and plot wise)

Enjoy 💗💗

Living in the Borderland has yet to become a nightmare you wished to have never happened. The slight feeling of blood dripping on your cheek, right after pulling the trigger at the right time. Enough for the body in front of you to fall face down, now to be only described as a dead corpse.

Every minutes, turned into an hour before completely turning into emptiness. An emptiness you felt corrupted by sadness, anger and solitude. Such emotions you had never once thought to experience in your life. And yet here you were, gun gripped tightly to your fingers, trembling as your enemies fresh blood dripped lifelessly on your clothes. Leaving you not only in complete shock and pain, but in a such petty way enough for someone to catch your attention.

There he was, standing just a few doors away from yours. Examining every movement you did. Something about you being « new » felt rather to interested for him. For him you were just another toy to play with.

Chishiya was his name, you learned it through Arisu (but never had the chance to get a clear look of his apparence) and who by being protective of you had rather decided to take you with him in order to keep you safe. Sadly, being just as stubborn you were, it didn’t last you enough for you to be lost once you decided to wonder around the Borderland, once escorted.

It didn’t took long enough before you were lost. Of course you did managed to remember about a few places such as the pool and the Hatter’s office but other than that the rest came more vague almost as if every time you passed a new room you were certain something was about to happened.

Thus, taking you by surprise the moment you heard a voice. A voice to cold yet not so friendly to be even thinking of offering whoever’s owner of this room or voice an apology to their privacy and yet out of habit, you did. “I’m sorry, I really didn’t-“

“Bare me your excuses. I am surprised you even got the guts to enter into The Hatter’s bedroom. Let alone Niragi’s, better watch your step next time.”

The voice faded just as the sound of their footsteps did along. However, the moment you were about the discover the stranger, nothing but a dim light flickering and silence corrupted the room before in your turn left the room out of sight.

Having a new face in the Bordeland has become quickly the top’s news. Even the Hatter himself being as frantic as he was, managed to invite Arisu, Usagi and you at one of the first meetings for the new comers.

Feeling rather uncomfortable at Niragi’s constant confrontation and small remarks, you noticed a pair of eyes watching you. It was him. Chishiya and just as he spoke, you were back into reality. The voice back at the Hatter’s place it was his all along. The pair of brown eyes watching you from a distance, all his.

Surprisingly, it didn’t took the both of you however, to start a conversation. His soft yet cold voice of his, intrigued you too much for you to become just as interested as he was with you. He just didn’t liked showing too much emotions.

The militants who worked with him noticed a slight change into his behavior. They noticed the sudden tone on the man’s voice whenever you shared the same room and as subtle as he tried to be. Heck even Chishiya noticed something in him changed.

Either you were to blinded, or just another prey of his.

Niragi of course, being the not so subtle out of everyone, grew annoyed that his very own team mate couldn’t face the fact that maybe. Chishiya’s new distraction became a little more than that.

“You know, if you stand there like a creep. I’m not surprised she would kill you like that bastard who tried to take her beauty away.” He murmured almost sounding like a threat, making a Chishiya rather annoyed.

Days has passed and you were getting familiar with the game’s tactics. How the world was build and how fascinated you become once Chishiya told you more about it.

The both of you grew closer, not wanting to express anymore feelings to make it talked about, you both knew it was for the best. And yet something deep inside felt as if you belong in each other’s arms but such coldness separated this act.

That is when one night, you and Chishiya were assigned for a game. A game you were both against another team, a game of where the heart was trust.

Things were going as told, however you were one tonight’s target. You felt the blade quickly brushing ahead of you just as you could, get away from but it was only a lost cost. Chishiya yelled out your name but it was to late. Your vision felt blurry just enough before for you felt into his arms.

Right before your eyes you knew it was your last days, and yet your mind by faith decided otherwise. You were found in a bed, rather comfortable, your eyes meeting the harsh light from the lamps enough for the people who sat next to you notice your awakening.

The first you noticed was Arisu with a poorly made bouquet of flowers held it to you. You smiled and thanked him. “Don’t forget it was me who chosen the flowers”. Niragi said, mocking Arisu in which you roll your eyes thanking them once again before they reunited in another argument on whom was going to put the flowers in the bowl.

“I will.” A voice too familiar interrupted the little fiasco. Your eyes meeting him once again, thinking that last night was going to be your last. “Chishiya...” You spoken softly received, by a smile you never once thought from such a man as his could.

Niragi taking Arisu knowing a little too much for your liking, left for you both’s privacy and quickly corrupted by a moment of silence before Chishiya walked towards you and said. “Feeling alright?”

To be frank you couldn’t tell. Something inside you was glad to be alive but on the other, felt such emptiness that you couldn’t even comprehend it’s own cause. “I had my better days.”

You both chuckled and as he sat down next to your bed, he gently took your hand onto his, delicately pressing his soft lips on it. Frowning at his quite unusual actions, you questioned him on his behavior.

“What’s wrong?” You decided to ask, feeling such worries in his eyes but also satisfaction to the fact that you were all alive and well.

He chuckles softly as he was sinking into deep madness, thinking how he could live such weird emotions in such quick paste. “Do you ever believed in love?” He asked you and by the tone of his voice, thought to yourself that he also was just thinking how rubbish it sounded. But he insist by repeating : “Have you?”

You looked at him for a few moments, feeling the slight heat coming trough your cheeks, trying to look away before he even catches your blush. Which he on his end showed a soft smile and continued. “It’s crazy how ever since you showed up, I’ve tried to ignore you. I couldn’t technically say why you made such an effect on me and yet for some reasons I do.”

Listening to every words, you held his hand a little tighter as a source of comfort. “You know... I’ve been feeling strange emotions as well, hell even those I never knew I could experience in a life time. I guess by meeting you I could finally say you were like home..”

Home? He wondered through his mind, admiring you as if he knew that maybe loving you weren’t his lost cost into living a little longer into the Borderland and to once you both left... live a life together. For once.

“I love you, Chishiya. As much as I know you want it to push it away, the distraction I’ve caused-“

His lips brushed yours in an instant. Not letting you finish your phrase, you knew what he felt to. Maybe you both needed each other and no matter the cause, the sacrifice you’ll have each other’s side.

“See told you, now give me five bucks.” Niragi’s was heard silently watching the scene with an Arisu whom seemed rather uncomfortable and a Aguni, annoyed by his loss. Thus, making the Chishiya and you turning heads to the scene, with such glare all three new it was time to leave.

[tainted-wine]

Caring For Your Hormonally-Charged Bird

Hawks x Reader (NSFW)

(I didn’t mean for this to turn into a monster with over 7k words, but I finally finished it. This is based off of my mutant headcanons and also takes some inspiration from user kazooli’s awesome thirst posts about Hawks. Happy Springtime, everyone!)

Edit: Now there’s a Part 2!

------------------------------

The songs of lovestruck birds rang across the streets. Freshly bloomed cherry blossoms rained petals down onto the pavement. Butterflies and bees hovered around the flourishing flowers. It was undoubtedly a beautiful day. Too bad you had to spend it in an office with an oncoming headache. A familiar voice spoke behind you.

“Wow, look at that. I don’t know what’s more gorgeous; the scenery outside or the lady staring at it.”

Hawks’s charm doesn’t affect you when he has pissed you off so many times in such a short span.

You’ve had the ‘privilege’ of working for the Hero Public Safety Commission for several years, from supporting public events to endless desk work. The pay was generous and life was overall more comfortable. All you had to do to stay on their good side was comply with every demand, ignore the condescending tones of the bigwigs, and turn a blind eye whenever you witnessed the occasional sketchy practice.

When they offered you a job as the personal handler of one of the top heroes of Japan, you almost fainted. You have always been a fan of Hawks. Fast, handsome, charismatic, he may not have the godly strength of All Might, yet he still felt just as flawless. You’ve been helping and guiding the winged young man since last summer and learned that he’s even more than what you imagined. He wasn’t just good-looking, he wasn’t just a sweet-talker…

He was also a fucking nightmare to work with.

You turned around to see said man ogling you a bit more than you were used to, his trademark crooked smile on his face, but you ignored that and went straight to business. “Your carelessness is trending again for the third time this week, Hawks.”

He drew a sharp breath in an exaggerated gasp. “Again? Oh, what could they possibly be on my ass for this time? Was I smacking on chicken wings too loudly in public? Did they catch the moment I almost flew into that crystal-clear window?”

You whipped out your phone, already prepared to show him a news page with a rather shocking photo. A man with an elegant and sleek appearance was beaten and bruised, his dazzling peacock tail fanned out behind him. The attacker was none other than Hawks, who was gripping the other man by the collar, his wings fully spread out with several sharpened feathers floating around his victim as an unnecessary precaution. It was a very aggressive display.

‘HAWKS LAYS SMACKDOWN ON PERVERTED PEACOCK’ was the headline.

“This is beyond excessive force. You could have just as easily restrained him with your quirk.” You scolded, fixing him with the steely authoritarian stare that you’ve been working on.

Hawks flinched, but you couldn’t tell if he was just playing with you or not. “Ma’am! I was simply defending the girl’s honor! She was very clearly uncomfortable and besides, wouldn’t flashing his tail like that be considered indecent exposure?” Yeah, that tone told you that he was clearly not intimidated.

“No, and even if it did, indecency and harassment wouldn’t excuse such a violent subduing. Furthermore,” you gestured at his threatening wing display in the photo. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were demonstrating similar behavior.”

He simply shrugged. “Just showing him who the bigger bird is around here.”

Your eye twitched. “For God’s sake, Hawks, you’re not an animal. Part of my job is ensuring that you maintain a friendly image that will keep the public at ease. This is not friendly. Shall I go through some of the comments for examples?” You scrolled down and cleared your throat in preparation. “Anyone else put off by how violent Hawks looks here? I didn’t know he had it in him to beat someone down like that. He’s usually all about being quick and efficient.” You scrolled down to the next one. “What’s the deal with Hawks? I was there and it was like watching a cockfight.” You clicked on a reply to that particular comment. “I know, right? I always wanted to meet Hawks in person, but after that, I was honestly too scared to-”

“Hold on, babe, I know you’re cherry-picking here,” Hawks, the little bastard, had taken out his own phone while listening to your reading. “Because those are nothing like my personal faves that I found on my Tweeter page.” You watched with silent frustration as his eyes scanned his phone until he found what he was looking for. “Ah, here we go. ‘Oh my GAWD, that look, those spread wings, he looks like such a beast!” He had raised the pitch of his voice for a mock feminine tone. “Leave it to Hawks to make all of us women feel safe. That pervert deserves to lose a few more teeth.’ Oh, and here’s the winner right here. ‘Just as I always expected, that hunk of a bird knows how to dominate. I can just imagine him towering over me, giving that same look while I take his big fat-”

“Hawks.”

He paused, but his shit-eating grin didn’t fade when he noticed your head being held in one of your hands. You hoped he didn’t notice that you were trying to hide the red that crept into your cheeks.

“…cock.”

You groaned loudly enough to most definitely be heard outside of the office. There truly were days when he would cut you some slack and be easy to deal with, but he has become downright unbearable for the past few weeks. His teasing has increased ten fold, yet he’s also been keeping his distance from you for whatever reason. It had taken you a while to notice, but he was normally more than happy to get in your face and ruin your professional act, but now, even when you’re the one trying to approach, he would casually step back to prevent the gap between you from closing.

And then it hit you.

Shit, it shouldn’t have taken you this long to connect the dots. You had even noticed how his wings appeared to be a shade brighter for the past few days, but dismissed it as a trick of the light. No, he had grown in his spring plumage.

“Uh, babe? You still there? Did the ‘C’ word break you?” Watching you stare into space was getting him a little concerned.

“You’re rutting,” was your simple reply.

Hawks’s face flashed into something more serious for a split second before giving a ‘tsk’ and looking away. “Took you long enough,” he scoffed. “Surprised the Commission hasn’t fired you for letting me go wild for so long. They must not have any replacements available right now.”

“Watch it,” you ordered. You pondered for a moment before asking, “Have you not been taking your hormonal medication? I know that you’ve been prescribed some for this time of year.”

He sighed and rubbed at the back of his neck, as if he was the one who should be feeling annoyed right now. Bitch, please. “Sometimes,” he muttered.

“Sometimes? They don’t work if you only take them sometimes, Hawks. I know you’re a busy hero, but you can put some effort into keeping track of your dosage.”

“Look,” it was the first time you’ve seen a genuine scowl on his face, the expression taking you back. “I just really hate that stuff, okay? They sap all of my energy and I put on a few extra pounds.”

You shook your head at his complaints. “Is that really worse than what you’re dealing with right now?”

“Yes. I’d rather be a horndog than a slug that doesn’t even have the will to move. It wouldn’t even be so bad if I could just sleep around every now and then, but that’s more trouble than it’s worth. I don’t wanna make your job that miserable.” He eyed you up and down for a minute, while you tried not to shy away from his piercing gaze. “Or I could find just one loyal partner that will help me scratch the itch?”

You stepped back, your heart racing at the unspoken request. “E-excuse me?” you stuttered.

Hawks raised his hands harmlessly. “Hey now, it’s just a suggestion. I’m pretty into you, you’re obviously into me, this could work out pretty well.”

An array of emotions were flowing through you, but you were more upset than anything else. “And what exactly makes you think I’ve been ‘into you’, as you’ve said?” Denial. You’re pretty sure that’s what this is. You know that you’ve been attracted to him since before you even met, but you weren’t going to let this overgrown brat have his way.

His sudden burst of laughter startled you. “You’re kidding, right? I still remember that look you had the first time we were in this room together, and it wasn’t the innocent ‘I wanna support my favorite hero’ look,” He was willingly approaching you for the first time in what felt like forever, every step sounding like thunder to your ears. “It was a ‘bend me over the desk and fuck me’ look.”

You were the one stepping back this time. You wanted to remind him not to use such foul language, to berate him for making such vulgar claims, but your voice was caught in your throat.

“We’d be doing each other a favor, right?” he continued, wings slowly expanding. “Keeping me in top shape is part of your job, isn’t it? I promise you that I’m gonna feel a lot better after this.”

You bumped into his desk, leaning back slightly as he finally closed the distance. His wings draped around each side of you, filling your peripheral vision with pure red. His face was only inches away from yours as he closed his eyes and inhaled deeply.

“You’ve been smelling so damn good lately. Been afraid that I just might pounce you if I get too close.”

A thickly gloved hand reached out and cupped your face with such a surprising amount of tenderness, you couldn’t help but wonder how it would feel bare. You were so entranced by his lustful gaze that you couldn’t find it in you to resist as he leaned in, feeling his hot breath as his lips drew closer to yours.

The door busted open accompanied by a shout. “Hawks sir! Your help has been requested at-OH!”

A genuine growl rumbles through Hawks’s throat and damn, that makes you tremble. By the time he turns toward the stumbling sidekick, he was already back to his cool and friendly self.

“Don’t stop on my account, buddy,” he beamed the younger man with an unwavering smile. “What’s the request?”

———

The next day, you tried very hard to pretend that little office incident never happened. You were not going to let something so unprofessional ever happen again. That was a promise.

Hawks, on the other hand, was being a persistent bastard. You were determined to win this battle. If he wanted the urges to go away so badly, then he can take his damn medication like he always has, not use your lack of authority and experience as an excuse to rebel. The only reason you haven’t informed the Commission about this is because you know that your head will be on the chopping block as well as Hawks’s. You will most definitely be in some shit once they realize that you can’t keep their most prized possession in check.

And to be fair, as the week went on, you really were wondering if you were cut out for this job. With his wings getting more vibrant, his advances becoming more frequent, and his feral rivalry against other men growing more severe, Hawks has officially become too unruly for you to handle, and you’re the goddamned handler. You couldn’t lose this job! What if they terminated you completely and you couldn’t get another position from the Commission?

You paced back and forth in the empty office. Hawks was late this morning, leaving you alone with your endless worries. He may act lazy, but he was never actually late for his meet ups. Looks like you’ll have to call him and pray that nothing serious has happened.

You jumped when your phone vibrated before you even reached into your pocket. Ah, looks like Hawks reached out before you did. You held your phone up, prepared to answer, and froze.

It wasn’t Hawks. It was the deputy, the very man that was kind enough to give you this job. He hasn’t called you since your first few days here to help get you started. With your progress, you doubt he was calling to give you a raise.

Well, as much as you wanted to throw the phone out of the window and find an appropriate place to bury yourself, you didn’t make it this far by cowering from these guys. Taking a deep breath, you picked up and greeted the man on the other side with a steady voice. “Good morning, Deputy.”

He addressed you with the same bored and unimpressed tone that you hear from every member in this cursed organization. Jeez, if you keep working here long enough, are you going to eventually sound as soulless as them? “I assume you are aware of Hawks’s current condition?” he asked.

Dammit. “My apologies, sir. I know that I have been neglectful of Hawks’s health and his behavior during this time. I have been doing my best t-”

“That isn’t the issue I am talking about, but thank you for confirming that you have indeed failed in keeping Hawks’s unsavory habits under control.” You flinched. Way to rat yourself out. “Hawks had managed to find and subdue the troublesome villain Libido.”

“Ah, of course. I have been informed of that, sir.” Libido was a cunning little criminal that has been causing trouble all over the city of Fukuoka. His ‘Love Breath’ quirk gave him the ability to exhale fumes with powerful aphrodisiacal qualities. The guy even made his own gas bombs, releasing them among unsuspecting crowds in the public. He was less of a villain and more of just a chaos-loving hoodlum that was too slippery for his own good.

The deputy carried on. “One of the sidekicks has told us that Hawks was exposed to his quirk.”

Oh. Oh dear. That’s some strong stuff to be subjected to.

“We have ordered Hawks to go home immediately and wait patiently instead of heading to a hospital. We will be sending treatment his way.”

Some of the tension left your body. “That’s good to know, sir. May I ask what kind of treatment he will be taking? I know I haven’t convinced you yet, but I want to do anything I can for his well being.” You hesitantly asked. Please, oh please let me make up for everything that has been happening.

You heard a faint chuckle from the other end. “That’s very good to know, because the treatment is you.”

You’re glad he couldn’t see the confusion on your face. “I’m sorry, sir. Are you saying I’ll be the one to doctor him? I’ll need to know what medicine he needs and how much rest he’ll be expected to-”

“Do you know how people affected by aphrodisiac quirks are normally treated?” he interrupted you for the second time. He didn’t even give you a chance to answer before continuing. “Given your questions, I’m assuming that you don’t. We can indeed offer drugs to weaken the effects, but Hawks will still be in great distress and will take a long time to recover, especially since he’s neglected to take his hormone medication with the help of an incompetent handler.” Ugh, you get it already. You screwed up. “But the quickest and most efficient remedy is, without a doubt, sexual contact and allowing the quirk to run its course. That is what we expect you to provide for him.”

What.

You took a full minute to collect your thoughts and ensure that you heard everything correctly. The deputy waited patiently. How kind of him. Once you gathered yourself, you conjured the most constructive response you could think of.

“Huh?”

An overly loud sigh sounded in your ear. Hey, it’s his fault for dropping this bomb of a request on you. “We can’t have the number two hero out of action for too long. The alternative is to strap him to a bed and sedate him for an uncertain amount of time. His rut has enhanced the quirk’s effects; this may even strengthen his arousal for the rest of the season.”

Your face paled. That sounds ten times worse than the way Hawks was already acting. “So, if I were to…be with him,” you blushed at the very thought. “That would provide the best relief?”

“That is the gist of it. You told me you would do anything for Hawks’s well being. Can I hold you to that?”

Your pounding heart was almost drowning out his voice. You didn’t mean to corner yourself like this. “O-of course. I’ll see what I can, um, do.” This discussion was getting uncomfortable.

“I didn’t expect you to be so hesitant. You’re a loyal fan of his, aren’t you? You should be thrilled. Few fangirls get this opportunity.” He laughed at his own joke. You sure as hell weren’t laughing with him.

“Yeah, of course, sir,” you grumbled. “I suppose I shouldn’t leave Hawks alone for too long. I’ll be on my way soon.”

“Excellent,” he said. “You’ll need to take some precautions, of course. Here’s what you need to keep in mind…”

———

You walked out of the local pharmacy, cradling the pills tightly to your chest like some sort of security blanket. The deputy’s advice echoed in your head.

“It’s best that you take contraceptives. Hawks’s mind will be clouded with feral cravings, such as the urge to breed. He is not going to accept condoms.”

You tossed the pills onto the passenger seat in your car.

“Again, Hawks is suffering from both the magnified effects of Libido’s quirk and his annual rut. It’s possible that he will not be of sound mind. If things get out of hand, you have the right to protect yourself.” the deputy paused for a moment. “Just try not to leave any marks on him, if you can. Hawks must look presentable at all times.”

Well, you did have a stun gun that you thankfully never had to use, and hopefully it will stay that way.

The deputy’s help made you way more anxious than before. Were you about to have sex with a horny man, or tame a dangerous beast? You still didn’t know what to make of this predicament.

You take your phone and select Hawks’s number. It’s probably best not to surprise him at his door. Hopefully he wasn’t too riled up and ignores your call.

The phone rings once, then twice, then you hear…whimpers? Shit, was it getting that bad?

“Hawks? Are you there?” you asked calmly.

“Babe.” Goodness, his voice was rough. He sounds like he just ran across the country. “Oh thank God. Talk dirty to me, baby.”

“Wha—no.” This was a mistake. You really weren’t prepared for such levels of horniness. He just blurted that out like it was nothing! “Look, um, I heard your urges are becoming too much to handle. I’m heading on over there to…help you.”

For a while you just heard what sounded like breathless laughs and weeping. Hearing him in such a fragile state had you genuinely concerned. “Y’serious? We’re-ah-we’re gonna fuck?” He was panting heavily between words.

Heat was gathering in your face. “Yes, that’s the plan.”

“Oh, fuck yeah. Get over here-fuck-so I can stuff you, babe. You’re gonna be mine. Oh I can’t wait to fucking have you.” This sounded like a goddamned porno and you couldn’t handle it. There was a strange sound in the background as he rambled, something like wet smacks. You kept hearing it in sync with his grunts and…

Oh.

“Just hang in there, alright?” You said quickly, wanting to end this call right now. “I’m coming.”

“Well, I’m not. My hand’s really not doin’ it for me. Gotta be inside you, babe. Gotta cum in that tight-“

You hung up.

You banged your head against the steering wheel harder than intended, but at least the pain got your mind off of…whatever all of that was. You can’t believe you just heard your favorite hero breathlessly talking about how he wants to bang you while jerking off. You didn’t know it was possible to feel this mortified, but that wasn’t the worst part.

The worst part was the tingle between your legs.

Hawks, one of the top heroes of Japan, the heartthrob of the generation, was lusting for you. It had you both excited and on edge. You remember the deputy’s comment.

“You’re a loyal fan of his, aren’t you? You should be thrilled. Few fangirls get this opportunity.”

You probably would indeed be thrilled if the circumstances were less dire. Your fantasies normally involved something simpler and more romantic, not saving him from his own sex-hazed mind. You still weren’t sure what you were walking into, and that was admittedly a different kind of excitement.

There was no time to waste with the state Hawks was in. Calming your nerves, you started your car and began taking the route to his place.

———

Here you are, at the doorstep of Hawks’s house. His place was surprisingly humble for a top hero, it made this encounter just a little less nerve-wracking. Pressing a finger to the buzzer, you waited anxiously, rocking back and forth on your heels. You really hope he’ll be dressed decently when he answers the door.

Your heart skips once you hear a click and the doorknob twists. It feels like it takes an eternity for the door to open and reveal…nobody.

Instead, you were greeted by a small flock of feathers suspended in the air. They slowly floated a distance away from you before stopping, as if they were waiting for something. You cautiously stepped inside, some of the feathers closing the door behind you. You don’t know what type of welcome you were expecting, but it wasn’t this. The feathers guided you, drifting up a flight of stairs and into a room with its door hanging open. You can hear harsh breathing inside, reigniting your fear. “Hawks?” You hesistantly called out without getting any closer.

A cracking voice cried out your name. “Help me. It fucking hurts. I’m so hot. Make it stop.” He sounded like he was crying. The desperate pleas prompted you to mask your fears for the umpteenth time and approach the room, taking in the sight of the man that has been waiting for you.

Hawks was naked, not to your surprise, but still to your absolute horror. He sat on his bed, skin glistening with sweat and a deep blush spreading throughout his upper body, making him look more feverish than aroused. His chest heaved with the irregular breaths that left his hanging mouth. His hair was even more unruly as usual, some of his locks sticking to his damp face. Your eyes locked onto his, pupils dilated and looking right through you.

He looked awful.

You came closer, trying your best not to stare at the very swollen and throbbing member between his legs. “I’m sorry,” you said softly, stopping right in front of him. “I didn’t think it would get this bad. I-I want to help. Just tell me what to do.”

He was on his feet the moment you finished, nude body just inches away from yours, but you kept your feet planted where they were. As his large wings slowly opened and enclosed around you, you noticed how brilliantly hued his feathers have become, practically glowing a vivid scarlet. It was captivating.

Two clammy hands came up to hold your face, the same hands he was furiously pleasuring himself with just a moment ago holy shit, and his mouth was on yours before you could even react. You gasped in shock of it all, allowing his tongue to slip past your lips. It was less of a kiss and more of just him hungrily ravaging every inch of your mouth, your own tongue wrestling with his to keep him away from the back of your throat. One of his arms lowered to wrap around your waist and pull you flush against his bare form, making you yelp when you felt his erection pressing against you. Hawks’s dick was on you.

You were too overwhelmed by his restless mouth and his DICK to notice the stray feathers hovering over you. A tug and a loud rip made you jolt. Hawks held you still, the sound of expensive fabric tearing making you flinch as your skin was slowly being exposed. The feathers were shredding your clothes.

You pulled away from his suffocating mouth just enough to take a breath and attempt to speak. “Hawks! Wha—” only for him to smother you once again.

“Don’t move,” he uttered between kisses. “Don’t want to cut you.”

With a few more slashes, your cherished suit was now scattered on the carpet in tatters, revealing your body to him, but the feathers weren’t done. The floating blades carefully slid under your panties and bra. You stood completely still, Hawks kissing you with less aggression in an attempt to soothe you as the feathers sliced through the last of your clothes. You were now just as bare as him. He simply held you tightly, face rubbing against yours with the occasional lick against your heated skin. Your eyes were closed shut, unable to process his frantic tongue, his surrounding body that felt like fire, his cock that was now pressed to your stomach you were going to drop dead holy shit.

“Smell so good. Tastes so good.” he groaned, still sounding short of breath. His mouth went down to your neck, sucking at it hungrily and giving the occasional nip, forcing a faint moan out of you. He continued his descent and reached your breasts, molding them roughly and attacking your nipples with hard sucks. Despite the rough treatment, a tight heat was building up in your abdomen, your hands cradling his head as he explored you. He ventured lower, now on his knees with his face right at your womanly mound.

Your heart was pounding when he leaned in, his nose lightly touching you as he drew in a long breath and giving a pleased sighed. His nose pressed in further and poked at your glistening pussy, your thighs clenching in surprise while he happily took in your scent. Fuck, he was really just kneeling between your legs and smelling you. You were ready to protest and tell him that this was getting too embarrassing before something wet and hot slid against your folds, replacing your planned words with a yelp.

Hawks apparently approved of your taste, strong hands grasping the back of your thighs as he brought you in closer to fully devour you. Your cries were impossible to hold in while he lapped at you, mind becoming too clouded with pleasure to stay modest. He moaned loudly into you, the erotic sound vibrating against you, tongue fondling every inch of your folds before his lips closed around them, sucking greedily and almost making your knees collapse. You were getting close, grasping onto his head in a desperate attempt to stay balanced, his mouth now assaulting your sensitive bud. Your blissful whimpers joined the filthy sounds of his feasting when your orgasm washed over you like throbbing magma. Once your legs lost the last of their strength, Hawks set you down gently on the floor, still licking your sensitive lips.

“Ah, Hawks…too much…” You whined weakly.

He got the message and pulled away to immediately climb over you, giving you a clear view of his face glistening with your juices. Bright wings were fully spread out once more; it feels like you were about to be taken by an angel, the most savage angel you could ever imagine.

He came down for a sloppy kiss, spreading your own womanly nectar all over your lips. “Hope you’re nice and ready now. Ready to take everything I’ve got.” He mumbled against your mouth. You couldn’t help but smile and feel grateful that even in such a frenzied state, he was still kind enough not to jump you the moment you were within sight.

You brought a hand up to caress the side of his face, watching his eyes flutter shut as he leaned into your touch like the needy animal that he was at the moment. His body was still unnaturally hot and he was still breathing harshly. It’s time to finally give this poor man some relief.

“Go ahead, Hawks. I’m all yours.” You were indeed ready for everything he has.

Hawks said no more, gripping himself and aiming right for your opening. The moment his head was pushing past your lips, he thrust forward, filling you completely and knocking the wind out of you.

You honestly thought he came right then and there with the totally profane howl that left him. “Fuck…!” he choked, looking on the verge of tears. Despite the seemingly paralyzing pleasure, he wasted no time in moving, his pace quickening at an alarming rate. Your pussy was still sensitive from his wonderful licking, his dick currently sending painfully powerful shocks that you just weren’t ready for, and yet heat began to pool within your core for a second time. Your arms were wrapped around his sweaty form, nails biting into his skin and forcing rugged grunts out of his throat.

The wet slaps of your bodies rang throughout the room, your limbs quivering as he pumped into you faster, his heavy balls slapping against your ass, full and prepared to pour every drop of its contents into your womb. Hawks had buried his head into the crook of your neck, letting you feel every breathless moan right against your ear.

All you could do was hold on and take the increasingly rough pounding. His rhythm was sloppy from the start, but the thrusts were becoming even more irregular as a sign that he was already reaching his peak. Not surprising, given the state that he’s been in all day. One well-aimed thrust hits your sweet spot, making you moan loudly against him.

The sound eggs him on, driving his hips at a bruising pace and fuck it feels so good it hurts. Your eyes shut tightly as another orgasm breaks free, your feminine walls clamping around Hawks, squeezing his own climax out of him. You gasped at the powerful throbs of his cock as it shot out stream after stream of cum inside you. The purely animalistic growl that rumbled through him had you shaking in the best way while you watched his wings twitch and flap, hitting you with a light gust.

After an impressive amount of spurts, Hawks collapsed on top of you. He was heavy, but having his weight on you like this was pretty nice. You rubbed soothing circles around his back, listening to the rather inhuman cooing sounds he made in response.

You just had sex with Hawks, your favorite hero and the very man you were paid to look after. Oh man, how badly have you screwed up your relationship? Not that you two had much of a bond in the first place, but now things will most certainly get even more awkward.

A twitch inside you interrupted your thoughts. What the hell? Hawks’s breathing was accelerating again as he suddenly lifted his weight off of you, and that’s when you realized even though he came, he was still hard.

With newfound energy, he pushed your thighs towards your chest and rammed into you before you could even register what was happening. His new angle had you seeing stars with each thrust, hitting you even deeper than before. The sensation was dizzying, your overstimulated body beginning to throb all over. Hawks had the most obscene expression on his face, glazed eyes watching your tits bounce while his mouth hung open, drool trailing down his chin. You didn’t know such a look existed outside of adult videos, and having it aimed at you was enhancing your stinging pleasure.

Looking down granted you the view of his drenched dick pushing into you, each slam of his hips rocking you into the carpet, which honestly burned like ouch. Thankfully Hawks was reaching his tipping point once again, his hips moving at a bruising pace before one final smack. You were spoiled with another wonderful image of his head thrown back as a choked moan escaped him, another round of cum shooting into you.

He finally slid out of you as he sat back to catch his breath, wings limply dropping to his sides. Finally. You didn’t know how much more your womanhood could take. The strain of moving your legs made you wince. Did he have to pin you so roughly?

Hawks watched silently as you pushed yourself up. You felt behind your back and…dammit, you really did bruise back there. Maybe you should go find a mirror; hopefully it didn’t look too bad. You noticed that Mr. Horny Wings continued to just stare, pupils still enlarged and his dick was still hard what the fuck. He suddenly shifted onto all fours and crawled behind you. The light brush of fingers over your blemished skin made you shiver. They weren’t big enough to be that painful, but you still hissed when he applied a little too much pressure, making him pull away.

“Sorry.” His voice was still raspy as he apologized.

You shrugged. “Don’t worry about it. Could’ve been wor—AH!”

Hawks shoved you forward, manhandling you until you were properly on your hands and knees. Fuck, your entire lower body was starting to ache, and here he was, ready to go another round. The head of his still-swollen dick was already pressing at your entrance. Grasping your hips, he pushed past your puffy lips and re-entered your heat. You bit your bottom lip and took the limitless strength in his hips, his balls sometimes smacking right into your clit and bringing you closer to your next climax.

His pace slowed down briefly in order to lower himself and suck at your bruises. “Nnngh, fuck, Hawks!” The combined pain and pleasure had your insides burning. He moaned and panted into your back, kissing up to your neck and sucking there as well. A pair of strong arms wrapped around your torso, pressing your body against his in an intimate embrace as he plunged into you more deeply.

It was impossible to not moan after each stroke. His face rested on your shoulder, and you reached behind to bury a hand in his hair. Shit, this was all getting so intimate. He was holding you and was so close, you could feel the ripple of his muscles as he caressed every inch of your inner walls. Your third burst of pleasure had you quivering against him as he continued to chase his own orgasm, stars appearing in your vision with each thrust. Hawks sank his teeth into your neck before bottoming out and releasing more cum inside you.

Both of you were lost in your sensual spasms before you collapsed. Hawks didn’t lay on you completely this time, his sweat-soaked form crouched over you, close enough to still be inside of you…

And rock hard.

You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me.

You stayed as you were, your face down and your ass up, as you felt him humping away at you again. You could barely whimper as your tender pussy took another pounding. Christ, why wasn’t he getting tired? If the quirk was getting any closer to wearing off, it sure as hell didn’t feel like it.

It wasn’t long before he came again, grunting with each hard buck as he filled you with his apparently endless supply of cum. Was he done? Please be done. You turned your head just enough to check the state of his erection.

Nope.

Hawks had enough mercy to carry you to his much more comfortable bed before continuing. He took you again.

And again

And again.

You were positively ruined, no more strength left in your body as he repeatedly claimed you with fervor. Whenever it appeared you were getting uncomfortable in a certain position, he would simply switch things up before carrying on. Despite how utterly exhausted and raw you felt, your orgasms kept coming, every surge of pleasure clouding your mind more and more.

You had lost track of time. Was this his fifteenth go? seventeenth? Keeping count was becoming a drag. It didn’t help that Hawks was in too much of a trance to even speak, giving you nothing but moans and growls. At least he didn’t sound on the verge of tears anymore, so maybe he was making progress.

Another orgasm was approaching; could your tired body even handle it? You were laying on the edge of the bed as Hawks stood and fucked you. Even through all of the overwhelming passion, you never got tired of staring at his wings, the dazzling red never failing to mesmerize you. They fluttered rapidly as the tension in your core spilled over, your mouth opening in a silent scream and a blackness closing in on you with every blink.

Your body was finished.

———

Everything hurts.

That’s the first thing you noticed when you woke up and made the mistake of stretching. Your arms and legs ached, a sharp pain shot through your back whenever you shifted, and between your legs…well, the throb down there didn’t at all feel pleasurable anymore.

Still, you fought the pain to sit up and examine yourself. Your nether regions were surprisingly clean, almost as if someone had already taken care of it. With all of the cum Hawks pumped into you, it should frankly be an awful mess down there.

Speaking of, where was the guy?

“Hey.”

Oh, there he was leaning in the door frame. He had obviously tidied up, no longer a flushed and sweaty wreck, and was now sporting a pair of loose pants and a tee. You had never seen him looking so casual. It was probably a privilege very few had, and knowing that ignited something in your chest.

He glanced around before looking back at you. “You alright?”

Realizing you were just gawking at him and haven’t said anything yet, you coughed to ensure your voice was still clear and functioning. “I’m fine.”

He snickered. It was a sound you were used to whenever he knew he had the upper-hand in some way, but something about it felt softer this time. “I just fucked you into high heaven for a whole day.” He could’ve acknowledged it in a less shameless manner, dammit. “I just wanna know if you’re alright. You look pretty stiff.”

A jolt shot through your lower back in perfect timing with his statement, making you flinch. “Yeah, I’m—I’m pretty sore. Very sore,” you admitted.

“Ah,” He stood up straight. “I’ll go get some, uh, pain relief. Be right back.” And with that, he was out of your sight.

You waited patiently for his return, actually observing his bedroom for the first time. It was surprisingly bare, the room of someone who didn’t spend much time at home. There was a window that you didn’t notice and holy shit he was right. It was nighttime; you spent the entire day in Hawks’s bedroom. The fangirl in you was squealing in delight. You told her to shut the hell up.

The man returned with a glass of water in one hand, a pill in the other, and a set of clothes draped across his arm. “Here,” he handed the water and medicine over before sitting beside you on the bed. You gulped down the capsule, sputtering a bit as the cold water flowed down your dry throat. “I’ve got some clothes that might fit you well enough. Sorry about your suit. I’ll give you some money for a new one.”

He’s never sounded so wooden before and you couldn’t stand it. You let out your best good-hearted laugh as you took the offered clothes. “Stop that, Hawks. You sound as bland as your bosses right now,” you joked.

He laughed along with you. “Heh, sorry babe. Just worried that I came on a little too strong at the beginning there.”

You simply hummed in response. His clothes were so warm and smelled like him. Despite being surrounded by his strong scent for hours, you still welcomed it.

“So…looks like you’re feeling better.” You took in his appearance again now that he was closer. There was still a tinge of red in his face, but he seemed overall back to his usual relaxed self.

“Oh yeah, much better. The feeling’s still there, honestly,” he saw your eyes widen and instantly blurted out, “Just barely! I can ignore it and think clearly just fine now.” A boyish smile spread across his face. “Looks like I’ve got a hero. You really saved me back there.”

A ridiculous snort left you after hearing such praise. “Is that all it takes to be the great Hawks’s hero? I’m flattered.”

“Hey, I’m serious,” He looked you square in the face, and you couldn’t look away from his sincere expression. “It’s never been that bad before. Not gonna lie, I’m embarrassed you saw me like that. That was worse than all of my teenage ruts combined. Damn villain’s quirk really messed me up, felt like I was going fucking rabid. I don’t know what state I’d be in if it weren’t for you.”

Your mouth opened and closed, unsure of how to respond to his gratitude. “You’re welcome,” was all you could say. “You don’t need to feel bad about it. It’s…” You looked down at your feet. “It’s not like I didn’t like it. It was very draining, honestly lost track of time at a certain point, but it, uh, it was an experience.”

Hawks nodded in response. “Sure was. Never thought I’d rail a girl so hard and for so long that she’d pass out. I’m impressed with myself.”

“Hawks.”

He hung his head in mock shame. “My apologies, ma’am! I completely forgot that such vulgar language isn’t tolerated around you.” And there’s the infuriating grin that you were beginning to miss.

Both of you were laughing, slowly melting away the tension and stress that filled the room since morning. This…this was nice.

“So, you probably still don’t feel all that great, sooo…” Hawks rubbed at the back of his neck. “You wanna stay for dinner? Already ordered a chicken pizza with some wings.”

“Oh?” You raised your eyebrows. “Taking me to dinner after the sex?”

“Hey now, you know me. ‘The hero who’s too fast for his own good.’ Sometimes I miss a step or two.” He winked before getting up to leave. “You just lay there and rest, and go pee already. Don’t need an infection on top of everything else you’re going through. I already cleaned up the horrifying scene between your legs.”

You shuddered at the crude comment before falling backwards onto the poor mattress that had endured so much today.

Tomorrow, it will be back to professionalism. Back to pretending that you’re Hawks’s superior. Back to sucking up to the Commission. You’re going to cherish every minute of tonight, enjoying the company of Keigo Takami, not Hawks.

A shout echoed from downstairs. “The bathroom’s still empty, babe! Get your ass in there and pee!”

[atlas-of-a-human-soul]

I just read your Riven fics and ommggg they are so good!! Idk if you are making a part three but I will definitely look out for it! I haven’t started the sly ones but I can’t wait!

Come back to me // part 2

Pairing: Riven x light!fairy

Breath caught in her throat, she felt her hands tremble as her eyes lingered on the envelope on her pillow. The handwriting is in the kind of black that speaks of nighttime dreaming. The letters are so typically Riven - messy and yet she could see the effort behind each and every word - To my Sunshine - .

It’s been a long time since he last wrote her a love note, far too long for her to truly remember what it said. She remembers how it made her feel - hopeful, elated, giddy. That’s all Riven needed to win her over - love notes he’d slip in her books whenever she wasn’t looking.

This time it felt different. The note brought anxiety, fear of what the envelope may hide inside. They barely speak nowadays and when they do, Riven is crude and too often she finds herself crying herself to sleep because of how convincing he is with his act. Sometimes she wonders if he’s acting at all or if that’s who he is with everyone but her and it makes her feel guilty. How can she still be questioning his loyalties?

Shaking her head, she releases a heavy sigh before her shaky fingers pry open the envelope. The paper inside is barely ink stained, a few words written for her aching heart.

“Still Your Asshole”

Chuckling, Y/N covers her mouth with an open palm, glancing at the door to make sure no one is nearby. It wasn’t a chuckle that seemed to stop as it turned into a cackle and that cackle turned into a sob. She didn’t know where the sobs came from, she just knew she couldn’t stop. As if the soul could bleed an ocean through the eyes, that was the enormity of her sobbing.

Screaming into her pillow, Y/N felt the rawness of her pain fully. It had revealed its ugly head and she couldn’t breathe. 

Riven may be hers but he isn’t. It takes a moment, a single mistake for him to be uncovered by Rosalind or Beatrix and he’d be taken from her. She’d never get to run her fingers through his brown hair, she’d never get to kiss his lips again or feel his hand in hers. He’d never tease her again, he’d never write her a new note or insist she needs him to teach her to fight. All of it would be gone in a blink of any eye and the severity of that realization choked the light out of her, even if for a little while.

She can’t always be the Sunshine. Clouds will eventually clear, but she needs the little bit of darkness and the sweetness it brings. Even if she’s in pain, even if the sadness threatens to suffocate her, she craves it. 

Riven makes her weak, he makes her vulnerable. She never dreamed she could care for a man like Riven, she certainly didn’t wish it, but she does. It’s more than caring for Riven, she’s way past that. Whatever wicked game he played to make her feel that way for him, it worked. She fell in love with Riven and now it’s consuming her.

Wiping her tears, she stashes the letter under her mattress before walking out in the sun. If she can’t be the light, she can at least get the warmth of another’s light.

She lays down on the damp grass, looking up at the sky. She looked at the sky like a man would look at a withered flower in which he no longer sees the beauty he plucked it for, thus destroying it.

This noble heart that beat only for the most tender of emotions had to be subjected to pain to learn the secret of life:

Love has to come at once, with thunder and lightning like a hurricane that wrecks havoc on your life, to shake you up and break the the heart like leaves off trees, to drag it into the abyss.

She’s in the abyss now.

“You can’t be here”, and then she hears his voice, pulling her away from the darkness. “Come on”, he whisper shouts as he takes her by the hands and helps her to her feet. 

She’s a little dizzy, disoriented by the sudden change in position. His eyes are on her, his face inches away and yet she feels like they’re a thousand miles apart. She doesn’t fight him as he drags her to the greenhouse, closing the door quickly so no one would see them.

“I got your note”, she’s the first one to speak. Riven turns to her with a small smile only for it to fall when he truly looks at her - puffy, red eyes and dry lips aren’t easily mistakable. 

He let out a slow controlled breath, “Is that why you cried?” Riven’s eyebrows furrow as he steps closer to her, his hands on his hips.

“I cried because I miss you!” She shouts, her fingers flickering alight and she knows she’s losing control. A shuddered breath passes her quivering lips, “I miss you and I’m worried about you and I hate you.” She says through gritted teeth and Riven can’t help but stumble back, confused.

“Me?” He raises his eyebrows, pointing his right index finger at himself, “What did I do?”

Scoffing, Y/N shakes her head. “YOU MADE ME LOVE YOU AND YOU’RE NOT EVEN HERE!” Covering her mouth, she turns away from him. She never told him that she loved him before and he never uttered anything close to it either. She feared looking at him and not have him say it back. After all, why would he?

“You love me?” Riven breathes out, still trying to collect himself. Crossing the distance between them, Riven wraps his arms around her. Pulling her back against his chest, he folds his hands over her abdomen. He’s holding on tightly, like she’s a dream he’s afraid to wake up from. 

“You love me?” He repeats in a whisper. Knitting her eyebrows together, she frowns and bites into the soft flesh of the inside of her bottom lip as his lips brush her earlobe.

“Yes”, she leans her head back on his shoulder, relaxing in his arms.

“Good.” Riven whispers and she snaps out of it, slapping his hands until he lets go. 

“Good?” She exclaims, her glare deadlier than a blade. 

“Yeah?” Riven chuckles, scratching the back of his neck.

“I tell you I love you and all you have to say is good?” She deadpans, before throwing her hands in the air, “Unbelievable.”

“Yeah. It’s good, because I’ve been in love with you for about a year now and it’s good to know you finally feel the same way.” Riven shrugs, “But go on. I like it when you’re angry.”

Rolling her eyes, she playfully slaps his chest, “Don’t fucking do that to me!”

“Did you just say a swear word?” Riven’s eyes widen, a grin much wider making Y/N blush.

“You’re really going to nitpick at my language instead of kissing me now when we finally got a moment alone in months?” She raises an eyebrow, tapping her foot nervously.

“I’m actually running late”, Riven wets his lips and yet he doesn’t move away, but closer to Y/N. All he can taste is the cherry chapstick she wore the first time they kissed. That was on a constant loop inside his head.

“We could run?” Y/N tries, but Riven only shakes his head.

“I spent my whole life running. I can’t betray Sky like that. He’s my brother.” 

Struggling to inhale, Y/N whispers, “And what am I to you?”

“The love of my life.” Riven blurts out without a second thought as his hands cups her cheeks, “You’re the only reason why I’m never going to give up.”

“You’re saying all the right words and my heart still hurts”, she sniffles, hoping she doesn’t cry again. She’s had enough of crying for a lifetime.

“I wish I could make it better, I do.” Closing his eyes, Riven leans his forehead on hers, “I love you with all I am. With all I’ll ever be.” Drawing in a sharp inhale, he holds his breath for a moment to stop tears from forming. “If I were a better man, I’d have let you go.”

“Don’t be the better man”, she croaks, her fingers curling his hair at the back of his head. “Be the bad guy. Just be mine.” And she kissed him. With a devastating sweetness, an innocence - as if this were the first time. Strong fingers curved about her jaw and warmth seeped into her bones, her skin, her soul.

The lips held to hers, reassuringly alive. Riven had reassured her by the strength of his arms surrounding her and the steady wilderness in his chest, beat of a heart not her own. 

She was no longer alone in misery. Someone was there, keeping her warm, holding the memories at bay and dangers of the world could no longer get to her. Her lips softened; tentatively, she returned the kiss with all her heart.

Breaking the kiss, Riven’s arms leave her, the warmth going with him. She stumbles, catching her breath. 

Riven glances at his phone only to swear under his breath and she knows something’s happened.

“Listen to me”, Riven swallows thickly, “Stay with Stella and the rest tonight.”

“Why”, Y/N frowns, folding her arms across her chest.

“Don’t ask questions, please.” Pecking her lips, Riven takes a few steps back, “If you love me as much as you say you do, go now and stay with the girls. I’ll try to contact you as soon as I can.”

“Riven”, Y/N raises her voice, unnerved and anxious about his behavior. 

“Sunshine, please”, his voice softens and she nods, licking her lips. Before she can say a word, he manages a smile, “I’ll come back to you. I will.” 

And that’s when he leaves and Y/N does as he asked. But the nagging feeling inside her chest is relentless - something bad is happening and someone is going to get hurt.

Part 4 

[wickedpact]

dear tumblr user crim wickedpact pls write the essay/dissertation about nicky being shakespeare's fair youth (if you have time, ofc!!)

Not To Imply Nicky Was Shakespeare’s Fair Youth But Ive Read The Fair Youth Sonnets & Nicky Was Definitely Shakespeare’s Fair Youth, an essay by me, tumblr user crim wickedpact

background knowledge: our man shakespeare wrote some 120 sonnets about a young man referred to as the Fair Youth during the mid 1590s; there has been some debate among shakespeare enthusiasts whether shakespeare’s interest in the Fair Youth was platonic or romantic (but like. they were definitely romantic). no one knows for sure who the Fair Youth was, but it was definitely nicky and my first and most important piece of evidence regarding this hypothesis is the ‘lmao babe do you remember that guy who had a crush on me?’/ ‘i try not to remember the guy who had a crush on you’ look joe and nicky exchange when Merrick brings up shakespeare during the movie. especially since gina confirmed in a tweet that joe and nicky canonly did know shakespeare

my second piece of evidence is that it just Works (except for a couple small facts like.. the Fair Youth was prolly closer to his 20s than his 30s. and the fact that shakespeare implies that the Fair Youth slept with his mistress at one point. but he doesnt know what hes talking about shhh we IGNORE)

long post under cut

A. The Description Matches

when describing the Fair Youth (who I’ll call the FY from now on), shakespeare says he has a ‘gold complexion’ and ‘beautiful eyes’ and compares him to a ‘summer’s day’. He says the FY has “A woman’s gentle heart" and “An eye more bright than [women’s are], (...) Gilding the object whereupon [they] gazeth”

As much as shakespeare’s perceptions of sexuality and gender are very........  late 1500′s (whoo boy sonnet #20 is a wild ride) ...... the description does match, and also:

  B. The Fair Youth Refused to Get Married

it’s never really said why one way or another (shakespeare assumes it’s because the FY is selfish) but the FY didn’t/wouldn’t take on a wife and have a kid, and this was something that was a real sticker for our man Willy S. because, as he says in his sonnets a million times: beauty doesn’t last forever, but having a child not only passes down the FY’s beauty, but also blesses the woman the FY would have a child with (im not saying shakespeare wanted to bear the FY’s children, but he definitely did)

Whose fresh repair if now thou not renewest, Thou dost beguile the world, unbless some mother. For where is she so fair whose uneared womb Disdains the tillage of thy husbandry?

(ie. If you don’t renew yourself/ have children, you deprive the world and deprive a woman from having your child, since what woman out there is so beautiful that she wouldn’t want to bear your child?)

Like.

1.) if nicky is the FY then so many of these poems center around the idea of nicky growing old sometime soon and that must have been pretty funny to Nicky and

2.)  the fact that shakespeare would have been So Desperate for nicky to find a wife must have been the opposite of funny to joe. considering the ease of his and nicky’s relationship and the fact that being gay in late 1500s england was probably not a walk in the park, it is very likely shakespeare wouldn’t have known they were in a committed relationship-- or at least not known how close they actually were. Thus:

  C. The Rival (aka. Joe)

shakespeare mentions having a poetic rival in regards to the FY in several sonnets. In sonnet #21 he talks about how he’s not like Those Other Writers who use grand metaphors to talk about their muses

So is it not with me as with that Muse, Stirred by a painted beauty to his verse, Who heaven itself for ornament doth use And every fair with his fair doth rehearse, Making a couplement of proud compare With sun and moon, with earth and sea's rich gems, With April's first-born flowers, and all things rare,

(ie. I’m not like other poets who, when inspired by a ‘painted beauty’ use heaven and every other beautiful thing on the planet to make a grand comparison to their muse: he specifically lists the sun and moon as examples as well as other beautiful things)

He then goes on to say

And then believe me, my love is as fair As any mother's child, though not so bright As those gold candles fixed in heaven's air:

(ie. my love [the FY] is as beautiful as any other beautiful person, though I wouldn’t compare them to the stars/heavens (which is what he means by the 'gold candles’. those are stars.))

So shakespeare insults poets who compare their subjects to the sun, moon, and stars (amongst other things) and in the comics, Joe does literally exactly that

That man is the stars in my sky, and the sun that lights my days. That man is the moon when I'm lost in darkness, and warmth when I shiver in cold.

shakespeare also goes on to say in the same sonnet “Let them say more that like of hearsay well / I will not praise that purpose not to sell” which is to say ‘let people who like that kind of language use it, I wont because I don’t want anyone else to have the subject of my affections (the FY)’.

(which is a bit of a contradiction regarding his feelings abt the FY getting married, but these sonnets are full of contradictions. shakespeare was a confused dude; man spent the first 100 or so sonnets convinced the FY loved him back only for him to start wondering if the FY ever loved him near the end)

(not to mention Marriage For Love wasnt really.. much of a thing in Ye Olden Times but thats a different conversation. so shakespeare prolly didnt associate marriage with love/competition? anyways)

Shakesy-boo goes on to complain about this rival several times. In #79, he says

Yet what of thee thy poet doth invent He robs thee of, and pays it thee again. He lends thee virtue, and he stole that word From thy behaviour; beauty doth he give, And found it in thy cheek: he can afford No praise to thee, but what in thee doth live.

(ie. everything ‘your poet’ (as the FY apparently favored this unnamed rival) says about you, he takes it from you in the first place. he talks about your virtue, but learned the word from watching your behavior. he calls you beautiful but only discovered beauty by looking at your face. every compliment he gives you he took from you in the first place)

[and, as a smaller example, he also bemoans the fact that people want to paint the FY in #67, saying, “Why should false painting imitate his cheek, / And steal dead seeming of his living hue?”. and yknow. Joe’s an artist.]

And then another example in #86

Was it the proud full sail of [the rival’s] great verse, Bound for the prize of all too precious you, That did my ripe thoughts in my brain inhearse, Making their tomb the womb wherein they grew?

Was it his spirit, by spirits taught to write Above a mortal pitch, that struck me dead?

(ie. he’s talking about how he’s having difficulty writing abt the FY and is rhetorically asking if ‘the proud sail’ of the rival’s verses was the reason his ‘ripe thoughts’ were killed in their ‘womb’. He then asks (again rhetorically) if it was the rival’s ‘spirit’ (or creativity, maybe) ‘’’‘by spirits taught to write’’’’ that killed his own drive to write. none of the analyses I’ve read really explain what shakespeare means by ‘spirits taught to write’, other than maybe being a joke or reference to something we dont know, but... ‘taught by dead people to write in a way mortal people can’t’ very much sounds like a description of an immortal poet, eh?)

Which brings me to,

  D. Willy Boy Thinks There Are 500 Year Old Writings About the Fair Youth

shakespeare talks about people having written about the FY ‘500 years ago’ from the late 1500s in #59 which......................... would have been around 1100 AD. :thinking face:

Oh that record could with a backward look, Even of five hundred courses of the sun, Show me your image in some antique book, Since mind at first in character was done, That I might see what the old world could say To this composed wonder of your frame;

(ie. Oh if I could look back 500 years and see how you were described in some old books so I could see/reference what people used to write about you)

Which again brings me to,

  E. I’m Not Saying shakespeare Stole From Joe, But:

1.) In #22, shakespeare says this,

For all that beauty that doth cover thee, Is but the seemly raiment of my heart, Which in thy breast doth live, as thine in me: 

(ie, your beauty is due to the ‘clothes’ my heart gives you-- probably means something like ‘you’re beautiful because i love you’. goes on to say his heart lives in the FY’s chest, and the FY’s heart lives in shakespeare’s chest)

so: shakespeare tells the FY he has shakespeare’s heart. in comparison, Joe calls nicky ‘my heart’ in the comics...... :thinking face x2:

2.) In #109, shakespeare tells the FY ‘thou art my all’,

For nothing this wide universe I call, Save thou, my rose, in it thou art my all.

which rings similar to Joe’s ‘he’s all and he’s more’ as well as (from the comics) ‘he is my everything’

and just saying. joe looks pretty #done the mention of shakespeare.

  F. The last One

Despite shakespeare writing 30+ poems about the FY eventually growing old, the very last poem he writes about/for the FY says,

O thou, my lovely boy, who in thy power Dost hold Time's fickle glass, his sickle hour; Who hast by waning grown, and therein showest Thy lovers withering, as thy sweet self growest. 

(ie. you [the FY] have power over the ‘mirror’ (fickle glass) of time as well as time’s ‘harvesting’ ability (sickle hour) and as you grow older, you remain beautiful while your lovers [shakespeare] wither and grow old)

The transition from ‘get married and have a baby before you get old!!!!’ in #1-20 to talking about the FY’s presence in 500 y/o books in #59 to admitting the FY isn’t growing old in #126 kinda seems to imply shakespeare learning of/about nicky’s immortality at some point, and this last poem is him accepting it.

TLDR: not only does it make perfect sense if nicky was the Fair Youth from the FY sonnets, but it also makes perfect sense if joe was the Rival from the FY sonnets. its canon nothing will convince me otherwise

[that-was-anticlimactic]

sk8 headcanons because i am Bored

autistic langa likes frozen fruit a lot—strawberries are his favorite—because he likes the cool texture

reki has lip freckles that really stand out after he’s been in the sun a lot ! there’s like four or five of them :)

just thinking about “all those friday nights / under the lights / under the bleachers together / you and i were meant to be something more than a faded memory / till you and i / something divided us” but matchablossom,,,

“but i’ve already lost it once / what i already won / i’ve lost too much now to care / but i know that something’s still there” ,,, matchablossom,,, ahhhhh

miya and shadow being besties,,, shadow being miya’s parental figure and miya being his adopted nb child,,,

shadow being the first person miya comes out as nonbinary to,,,

adam going to jail,,,

reki having a stuffed animal collection and letting miya name some and then realizing that miya never had a stuffed animal growing up so reki gives miya one of his older ones that he loved as a child and then buys them a new one too… and miya asks reki to name it for them because sentiments,,,

after seeing the girl he had a crush on kiss someone else, shadow takes out his feelings on the only thing he knows how to—skating at s but he’s not in a good mind and he feels sick because he thought he thought he thought he had a chance and he doesn’t pay close enough attention and gets hurt and miya calls him an idiot and patches him up and shadow feels like a kid again but it’s kind of nice to have someone else actually help with his wounds instead of just attempting to wash them and then cover them with makeup by himself,,,

joe and shadow bonding over hating the feeling of loneliness so they make up for it the only way they know how which is being loud and being extra because they don’t feel as lonely if they’re loud

reki, miya, and cherry = adhd club

cherry and reki drawing together… and reki teaching cherry how to be more loose and carefree when he draws and cherry teaching reki how to add more structure to his art,,,

langa stealing and wearing reki’s headbands,,,

langa with glasses

reki’s sisters doing cherry and joe’s hair,,, or even reki, langa, and miya doing their hair and shadow just watches and takes pictures and reki puts cherry’s hair in fishtails because he had practice with his sisters and cherry secretly likes it (and so does joe) and miya and langa just. completely messing up joe’s hair and putting hair clips in it and langa attempts a ponytail kind of like how cherry does his hair at s (and no cherry did Not find it very attractive shut up)

shadow being a scrapbooker and having like ten scrapbooks from his life,,,

shadow not being as good of an artist as cherry or reki but he does it because he enjoys it and when cherry and reki find out they invite him to draw with them

the crew / sk8 fam all going to shadow’s house and doing a couple scrapbook pages together and it’s a mess but it’s them and it’s one of shadow’s favorite pages because he’s never scrapbooked with anyone before

langa is just naturally beautiful and photogenic so the art squad always asks him to model for them if they want to draw people

joe has depression because i want him to

and shadow has anxiety

because i do Not want any of them to be neurotypical

yeah so joe has depression, shadow has anxiety, cherry has add and anxiety, miya had adhd and separation anxiety, langa is autistic, reki has tourette’s and adhd and depression ✌🏻

when miya gets old enough, shadow gets them a part time job at the flower shop

miya likes a lot of pillows

langa sleeps with no pillows (unless reki is partially his pillow)

thinking about after reki’s second beef with adam,,, joe after he tells adam off and they’re away from the crowd, he passes out because let’s be real—there is absolutely no way he didn’t get injured and the worse one is probably a broken nose and a huge gash at the back of his head with like skin peeling and stuff like need stitches so the gang all goes to cherry’s and they help patch reki up

somewhere in that time the love hotel gets brought up and by extension getting hit by the car and getting beat up and joe and shadow are on the verge of slamming their heads against the wall at reki’s nonchalantness

and reki’s p injured so he’s laying in the couch with his head resting in langa’s lap,,,

joe tells everyone embarrassing cherry stories from school like all the time (but joe was a foolish child so cherry gets revenge)

miya likes crime documentaries

joe unironically watched supernatural and that’s part of the reason why he and cherry broke up

(maybe joe just thought dean was attractive—sue him!)

lol wait what if cherry sued adam to pay for reki’s medical bills since they inevitably had to take him to the hospital

cherry constantly tells joe that he will sue him

joe may unironically watched spn, but cherry unironically watched glee

langa wrote destiel fanfiction once upon a time

langa wrote cas bakes dean a pie--

miya is carla’s favorite (after cherry)

cherry and langa with weighted blankets also

sometimes reki steals langa’s but only if he stays the night or langa brings it over and usually if he “steals” it, it’s them sharing it or reki needs the comfort of the weight if he’s not having a good time mentally lol

joe with depression,,, i just think about that a lot sometimes,,, sometimes cooking feels meaningless and, like langa, he only feels something when he skates but it’s only this temporary feeling of joy and life,,,

and shadow with anxiety,,, over-compensating his anxiety by being shadow at night and being over the top and sometimes mean because internalized ableism,,, and if he pretends he doesn’t have anxiety then maybe he won’t feel it late at night or when everything seems to go wrong during a shift at work and he keeps dropping flowers because his hands are shaking and girls don’t like guys with anxiety, right ??? so shadow thinks that he CAN’T have anxiety :/// poor dude

miya with separation anxiety pushing people away before they get attached because if they push them away before they become friends, then they wouldn’t be able to leave them,,,

langa always bouncing his foot in class and all the time because it’s his main form of stimming (look at that boy and try to tell me he doesn’t bounce his legs like there’s no tomorrow i dare you) and sometimes it makes his legs sore and cherry and joe once recommended using a heating pad if it got really sore and langa does sometimes and it makes him happy

reki with ts having anxiety when he has to speak in front of the class / do presentations because he’s hyper-aware of his tics,,, so he always meets langa’s eyes and watches langa the whole time and langa sometimes mimes taking deep breaths which really helps but honestly just seeing langa makes reki feel like he can do anything (because he would do anything for langa)

cherry doodling to stim as a child and always getting in trouble for it because teachers used to like get pissed when students doodled (or maybe they still do and it’s just always been pissy teachers and not specifically teachers when our parents were kids) and eventually cherry got fed up with getting points docked for doodling so he started writing lists and stuff and been realized he had impeccable handwriting (also joe let cherry doodle on his hand during classes they had together so cherry wouldn’t get in trouble)

cherry once had a dream that he was rachel berry and joe was finn uhh *insert last name here* from glee and joe had a beautiful voice when they sang duets in his dream so he managed to convince joe to sing in reality and turns out joe cannot sing and cherry’s glee dreams were never the same (look i am tired lol)

joe likes being the strong one in the group and he enjoys being able to mess around / show off by just casually picking people up (he also does it as an expression of love because they’re basically hugs depending on how he holds you) and one day cherry is like… done with it ??? and just strolls up to joe and just throws him over his shoulder or something and joe combusts because he did Not know cherry can do that and no his face isn’t red shut up he doesn’t find this attractive what’re you talking about

miya wants a sword and keeps trying to convince everyone to get them one for their birthday but no one will agree because ‘they’ll hurt themselves and everyone else it does not matter that all your favorite characters have swords that does not mean You should have one’

langa is the kind of person that puts peanut butter on a cheeseburger

reki’s love language is a mix of gift giving and acts of service, but he tends to lean more towards giving gifts. his receiving love language is words of affirmation but he does Not know that yet (langa does—hence his constant “you’re amazing, reki”—and eventually so does the rest of their gang lol)

shadow likes theatre

miya has internet friends,,, so does cherry,,,

joe posts those affirmations on his story all the time

reki’s texts are sometime hard to read because a) his hands get injured a lot and b) tourette’s but langa (and soon the others) learn how to read reki texts

langa sleeps with a fan on for white noise

shadow was worried (and feeling a little left out but if he doesn’t acknowledge it, then that emotion is not real… that’s how that works, right???) since he was in the hospital when reki skated against adam the second time, so when they all went back to cherry’s to tend to reki’s numerous wounds and also celebrate friendship, miya kept shadow on a face time call the entire evening

langa has an android phone

reki is super comfortable with periods because he lives with five girls—he also usually has a couple of pads and tampons on him at all times because he’s the older sibling lol

langa wears socks with sandals,,, so does shadow,,,

shadow’s feet get cold easily so he wears fluffy socks a lot

cherry keeps his fingernails at the perfect length to dramatically tap them against the table (also to freak people out by doing that)

miya is Not a morning person

miya also likes having the windows to shadow’s car rolled up because their hair gets in their face otherwise but shadow likes them down so it’s this constant struggle

i still stand by cherry suing ad*m and using the money he won to pay for reki’s medical bills (… and shadow’s… and langa’s if he needs any)

i just feel like many people have reason to sue ad*m

ponytail langa rights

joe had really bad acne as a child and teen and cherry helped him feel less self-conscious about it and helped him embrace having acne and that’s one reason why he exposes so much skin as joe because it’s a reminder of personal growth <3

also joe has acne scars on his chin and cheeks

joe has cherry’s calligraphy all over his walls

ik i already said so in reki with ts headcanons but he doodles pictures for everyone in the sk8 fam and they all keep each and every one and shadow even puts them in his scrapbook

let langa punch adam 2k21

let reki punch adam 2k21

actually they All deserve to punch adam 2k21

miya’s favorite movie is coraline

langa can’t snap his fingers

joe and cherry always argue over whether even numbers or odd numbers are best

miya does esports

joe was in marching band and was in drumline

cherry stays up late to look at the stars and he had those plastic stars taped to his ceiling as a child

reki eats tomatoes like apples and it makes joe want to cry

okay if the atla & and the sk8 characters became internet friends… these are who i think they’d be internet friends with…

cherry: katara

joe: suki

langa: sokka

miya: aang

reki: zuko

shadow: toph

note: suki, joe, miya, and aang are all actually besties. aang is the kind of person that would usually annoy miya but they just can’t dislike aang no matter how much he may want to and they somehow find themselves attached

but suki and miya would also get along really well because I know they would and aang and joe would just have fun and like it’s what they deserve so they are interchangeable / all besties

also sk8 characters if they were benders...

cherry: fire or waterbender,,, cannot decide

joe: earthbender

langa: waterbender

miya: firebender

reki: resident nonbender

shadow: earthbender

[hockeyboysimagines]

All good boys go to Heaven but bad boys bring Heaven to you

Chapter 6

Warnings: language, sex, a fist fight, (tw) stalking, lots of angst, and some fluff.

Sorry it’s taken so long. I’ve been trying to get Say it to me softly out, and now it’s finished so this will be updated more regularly. This is a very appropriate gif for this chapter. Stay tuned💕

“Chucky watch out!” Matt turned just as a puck cracked off the side of his helmet and sent him tumbling to the ice. He hadn’t been paying attention during practice, instead thinking all the ‘not sleeping’ he had done the night before. He could hear Noah and Johnny laughing as they skated over and helped him up. He deserved that one.

“Dude you gotta pay attention. What’s going on in there today space cadet?”

He wanted nothing more than to tell them. He was not only thinking about Hallie, but also about the mysterious flowers that had obviously rattled her. So he went with amended version of the truth.

“We’ll actually.” He turned to Noah and leaned on his stick “Has Hallie ever mentioned like a bad boyfriend or anything?”

Noah looked at the ceiling and chewed on his lip for a moment before he shook his head “I don’t think so, not to me anyway. Why?”

He chose his words carefully, keeping his expression cool “Well I showed up at her place yesterday and made her have dinner with me, and while I was there she said she got flowers and she assumed they were from me. But I didn’t send her any, and she got all fucking weird about it.”

“Was there a card?”

He shook his head “No but she was definitely upset. I offered to stay but she said it was fine.”

Johnny rolled his eyes and gave him a shove “Of course you did.”

“I can ask Carly if you want. They tell eachother everything.”

“No it’s okay. I don’t wanna invade her privacy or anything. Just seemed weird to me.”

They went back to running drills but his mind was still elsewhere. The more he thought about it the more her behavior bothered him. She had seemed upset, anxious, and scared and the whole thing had rubbed him the wrong way. He didn’t want to get involved in her business but it was really bothering him.

*******

“Come on Hal we’re going to be late.” Carly complained as Hallie shoved her feet into her shoes. She locked the door behind her and dig around in her bag as they took the elevator and exited her building towards the parking lot.

As they walked through the parking lot, she was still digging for her keys when she felt Carly’s hand on her arm forcing her to stop.

“Hal?”

Hallie looked up and felt the blood feeeze in her veins. Rose petals littered her car, moving very gently in the breeze. She took a step backwards turning her head this way and that but the parking lot was empty. She turned slowly towards Carly who was looking at her alarmed.

She began to shake, eyes filling with tears. She thought when she came here this would be over, that she could finally be free and not live her life looking over her shoulder. But she was wrong.

“He found me.”

**********

“Hal? It’s me open the door.” Matt said knocking. He hadn’t heard from her all day, and was starting to get worried when Carly told him she was sick, but was them confused when she texted him and told him to come over. He heard her shuffle around on the other side of the door before she eased it open, big eyes peering at him through the crack.

“Are you okay?”

“I’m fine, come in. Hurry up.”

She yanked him inside and clicked the lock as she shut the door. He frowned at her.

“Are you okay?”

“I’m fine why?” She breezed past him to pick up her buzzing phone on the counter. As she read the message the color in her face drained.

“Something wrong?”

Hallie stuffed her phone in her pocket and shook her head not meeting his eye.

“No why?”

He shrugged “ you just got super weird when your phone went off that’s all.”

“No I didn’t.”

“You did but it’s none of my business.”

“Your right. It’s not.”

“Maybe I should just go.”

“No!” She grabbed his arm holding him in place “I-I mean sorry. I just had a long day is all. Stay please?” She looked uncomfortable asking him, but there was another emotion he couldn’t identify. Whatever it was, it was convincing.

“I got your mail by the way.” He said setting several white envelopes and a large Manila one down on the counter, and walking from the kitchen to the bathroom. He needed a shower, and went to rummage through the collection of clothing he had accumulated. He had hoped by pulling his shirt off and walking back past the kitchen he could entice Hallie to come shower with him but he found her standing with her back to him, looking at an article of mail in her hand. He could see her trembling from where he stood.

She had opened the large envelope first, noticing it had no return address, but felt bulky and heavy. She felt goosebumps bloom across her skin as a stack of photos slid out and she looked through them. There were dozens, her walking to work, out with friends, her and Matthew. Each photo got progressively closer and some had foul crude writing on them. Mattys face was crossed out on several of them and a few were ripped in half.

“Hallie?”

Matt was standing in the middle of the room, shirtless looking at her, concerned. She thought for a minute about hiding them but she knew that there would be no point. She held the photos out to him and he took them, frowning. His eyebrows furrowed as he shuffled through them.

“What-what is this?” He looked mad now, eyes burning. His knuckles were white as he gripped them ”Who took these?”

She took a deep breath “ His name is Ryan. I dated him for a few months before I moved here, to get away from him. He started stalking me, saying we were meant to be and he couldn’t live without me. I thought I got away from him but he found me. He left roses on my car this morning. And he texted me just now.”

“How long has this been going on?”

She looked down “A few days. That’s where the flowers came from the other day. And I got a weird phone call at my office last week. -“

“A few days? And your just telling me this now?”

“I’m sorry. I thought he would just go away. I was wrong.”

Yeah I’d say you were. We need to go to the police.”

“I already have. They can’t do anything about it. Besides he’s just trying to scare me.”

“ And what happens when that’s not enough for him anymore? What happens then? If you think this creep is going to be content to watch you forever, your wrong. He’s going to hurt you.”

“I know I’m-I’m sorry.”

“That’s it. I’m moving in here.”

“What?! No!”

“It’s not up for discussion. Till this guy goes away I’m staying here.”

She wanted to be annoyed, but in all honesty she was relieved. She felt safe with him in the apartment, and it felt good to get this off her chest.

“And what are we going to tell our friends?”

“Would it be so bad if they just knew about us? I mean really Hal. Your starting to make me feel like I’m just a good lay and that’s the only reason you keep me around.”

She looked hurt for a minute and her expression softened “Matty. I’m sorry.” She put a hand on his arm and rugged him closer “I never meant to make you feel that way. I’m just scared okay. Of this, of Ryan of everything. We will talk about this, but give me some time.”

He pursed his lips for a minute before he nodded.

“Okay. That’s fair.”

She squeezed his arm before wrapping her own around him, her head resting on his chest near his heart. He was so big and safe, any worry she had about Ryan out the window, as she stood listen to his heart beating through his shirt.

She had lived by herself for so long it was weird having a roommate. Especially one who walked around mostly shirtless and slept in her bed. She learned a lot about him in the following days. She learned how incredibly sweet he was, and how much he loved his mom and his sister. She learned he slept on the left side of the bed, that he never had a dog growing up, and that he was not the pest that everyone saw on the ice. She learned that he loved to dance, and they had spent much time slow dancing in her kitchen, and that he could talk about everything and anything late at night. His voice, which had annoyed the hell out of her just a few months ago, now soothed her every time she heard it. She liked seeing him smile at her across the table, or next to her while they brushed teeth, and his presence had become a comfort that she never knew she needed. She had fallen hard for Matthew Tkachuk, just like she knew she would.

One particular rainy Sunday morning she had woken up to his big rough hands barely brushing the bare skin of her back. She rolled over eyes still closed, lips immediately finding his in the dim light of her bedroom. He kissed her deeply, lips moving slowly, tongue pushing inside her mouth. There was already minimal clothing on, so it didn’t take long before he was pushing inside her. She let out a breath, eyes closing slowly. Each time was more enthralling than the last time. He moved slowly, lazily hot breath on her neck. She reached up, running her fingers through his hair. She could her the dull pounding of rain hitting her window, the thick grey clouds making the room dim. But she could see those eyes burning into her own, as he moved above her, curls falling into his eyes. He leaned down and kissed her heavily, as his pushes became faster until he let out a ragged breath as she tensed around him, her own high coming with his.

“Can we stay in bed all day and do that again?”

Before she could answer she heard her front door open and then close. Panic rose in her throat as Matt jumped off the bed, yanking a pair of gym shorts on and banged the bedroom door open. He couldn’t believe this creep was bold enough to come into her apartment in broad daylight, but he was going to kill him before he got the chance to ever do it again.

“Matty wait!” She whispered pulling a T-shirt over her head as she hurried out behind him. To her horror it was not Ryan in her kitchen, but Noah and Carly standing there with wide eyes and open mouths.

“What the hell?” Noah said, eyebrows raised so far up his forehead they were in danger of disappearing into his hairline.

Hallies face had bypassed Red and turned Maroon as she shrank down behind him under Carly’s glare.

“Are you two serious right now?” She asked hands on her hips, looking between them.

“How long has this been going on?” Noah asked. He too was frowning, arms crossed. He knew something was up, and they had become even more suspicious when Hallie started being magically busy the past few weeks, coupled with Matthew being notably absent and coming and going at all hours. They had never though thought in a million years they would find them shacked up together in Hallies apartment.

Matthew took a deep breath and turned to look at her before looking back at their friends “Since that weekend at the lake.”

Carly sucked in a loud breath, eyes huge. She sputtered for a few moments, words completely escaping her.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” She asked after a few moments. She looked hurt. Hallie had wanted to tell her so bad, but she didn’t want to say it out loud. She was so scared that she had even let him in, but now to tell everyone else? That was terrifying.

“Let’s talk about this another time yeah?” Noah said, giving Carly’s arm a gentle squeeze.

“No.” Matt said “Let’s talk about it now. We didn’t tell you guys because we didn’t really know what to say. I honestly still don’t know what this is.”

“But there’s something else too.” Hallie reached behind her to pick up the envelope full of photos and handed them to Carly. She looked alarmed as she pulled them out, face turning white.

“Hallie.” She whispered.

“What the fuck?” Noah said, grabbing a few photos from Carly’s hand, and looking at both of them clearly confused.

“Sit down.” Matt said, patting the counter and walking to the fridge to pull out the liquor “We’ll tell you everything.”

And they did. They started with the lake house and went from there. Hallie and Carly walked Noah and Matt through the details on what had happened with Ryan and how they had come to Calgary to get away from him. Noah was so angry about the stalking, and the fact that she had kept it from them, he gave her a very stern talking to.

“This creep could have hurt you. Both of you.” He said glaring at Carly as well “We can’t keep you safe if we don’t know what we’re trying to keep you safe from.”

“I know, and I’m sorry.” Carly said giving his hand a squeeze.

“Now that we’re all in the loop I think we can agree that you two can’t go places alone for right now.” Matt said rubbing his chin “It’s just the way it is. Until this guy goes away or does something to get arrested for it has to be this way. When we have away games you two have some kind of sleepover or something. Have Jay come too.”

Carly giggled “I don’t really see Jay taking down an intruder, but safety in numbers right.” They laughed and the mood seemed to change. They decided to order takeout, and Hallie realized how much better she felt not keeping secrets. To finally have her and Matt out there in the open felt good, and natural.

After Noah and Carly left, it was just them in her apartment. He was smiling at her, a smile she hadn’t seen before. He walked very slowly towards her, eyes burning into her own.

“Thank you.” He said coming to a stop in front of her, hands resting on her shoulders.

“For?”

“For telling our friends. I know it wasn’t easy, and I know you didn’t want to, and I know your not my girlfriend or anything but thank you.”

“You haven’t actually asked me to be your girlfriend.”

He shrugged “I’m not really in the market for a relationship right now so.”

She gaped at him till he burst out laughing and swept her up, carrying her down the hallway towards her bedroom.

“Come on. Let’s go do boyfriend girlfriend stuff.”

********

As news of their new relationship spread, Matthews performance on the ice skyrocketed. He was having a great season, exploding on the ice and making headlines every game. He was still a pest, and that would probably never change, but he found himself playing with a confidence he didn’t know he had.

Plus it was an added bonus to look up and see Hallie sitting in the stands, looking so damn good with his name across her back. She was a steady constant in his life, and he found that having a real relationship was better than any hookup.

After one particularly physical game, Hallie waited nervously in the hallways outside the dressing room. Noah exited followed by Johnny and came over dropping a kiss on Carly’s cheek and turning to Hallie with a smile. Johnny gave her a gentle bump on the shoulder and grinned when he saw her expression.

“He’ll be out in a second.”

She peeked our from behind Him, as the door banged open and Matt came through the doors of the locker room, wet curls falling around his face with a casual elegance, cheeks pink, tie loosened around his neck. His eyes searched around the room till they landed on her and he smiled.

That damn smile.

He accepted a few pats on the back from his teammates as he made his way over to her, and stopped a few feet in front of her. She looked him over not noticing any injuries or blood and he held his arms out wide.

“ I’m fine Hallie. “

She breathed an audible sigh of relief and fell gratefully into his arms. He was so big and warm and she closed her eyes and breathed him in.

Watching Him fight had been a confusing expression to say the least. She had seen videos of it on YouTube but watching it happen live was completely different than through the tv screen. It was horrible because he was her boyfriend and she didn’t want him to get hurt, but it was enthralling to watch him throw his 6”2 frame around with such confidence on the ice. She wasn’t sure if she wanted to kiss him or smack him and the whole experience had left her emotionally drained.

They made idle chatter as they made their way out of the SaddleDome and into the parking garage, making plans to get together with some other guys from the team the following evening.

Once they were buckled in the car he turned to find her already staring at him.

“What?”

Her eyes were squinted and her head was turned to the side and like a flash of lightning she had hopped from the passenger seat to the back. He wasted no time following her, as they hurriedly pulled at whatever clothing was necessary to come off. She tugged the zipper of his suit pants down, and hiked up her skirt. She was dressed for work, having come to the game right from there with no time to change. She motioned for him to sit but he shook his head and leaned her back against the backseat, coming in between her legs. She settled in, opening her legs. His eyes bugged as he watched her pull the skirt up to reveal she wasn’t wearing stocking, but black thigh highs, and no underwear.

“Hal.” He breathed as she pulled his suit pants down enough and guided him towards her entrance. Her eyes closed and she arched back against the seat at the sensation of him pushing inside of her. He pushed again, adrenaline pumping through him as he quickened his pace, pushing deeper with each thrust.

“Matty.” She breathed, pulling his face to hers so she could kiss him. She fisted his dress shirt in her hands, as she pushed her tongue inside his mouth kissing him sloppily. Her legs began to ache as his pushed became erratic, and she came, him following shortly after. They say breathing heavily for a few minutes before he pulled out of her and sat next to her, situating his suit pants and turning to her. She smiled tiredly at him, eyes closing as he ran his fingers through her hair.

“Take me home.”

********

Hallie felt a twinge of annoyance at the way the girl was so obviously flirting with him and he was doing nothing to stop her. After a long night and a lot of sex, Hallie was overly tired and hadn’t really been in the mood to go out at all. She only had because she promised Carly she would. Matthew had gone to the bar to get a drink and was immediately approached By some bimbo in a short skirt, and that was all it took to bring Hallies mood down even more than it already was.

“Relax Hal.” Carly warned. She could feel an angry heat creep up her neck as she watched him smile at the girl, way to friendly for a guy who had a ‘girlfriend.” She angrily slugged the rest of her drink before setting it down loudly on the table.

“I’m going to the bathroom.” She said stand up and storming towards the ladies room sign, glaring at the back of the girls head who was flirting with her boyfriend.

She burst through the door, startling several girls who were fixing their makeup and blinked away angry tears while she went pee. Who did he think he was? They finally tell their friends the truth and here he was laughing and smiling with some random girl in the bar.

When she exited the bathroom she felt a hand on her arm. She turned ready to chew Matt out, when she realized the hand wasn’t his. She froze. It felt like someone was pouring maple syrup over head, and it was trickling down her body suffocating her as she came face to face with Ryan.

“Hi Hallie. I’ve missed you.”

“Get away from me Ryan.”

“I’m sorry about the photos, it was the only way I knew to get a hold of you after you blocked my phone number.”

“And what about the flowers on my car? How did you find my apartment?”

“I just know that you really love pink roses.”

“How did you find my house?”

He took a step forward and backed her further into the corner. Carly had noticed the exchange from across the bar and stood suddenly knocking her stool back and startling Noah. Matt turned from the conversation he was having to look at her as she jumped over the stool.

“That’s Ryan.”

As Hallie tried to maneuver around Ryan he grabbed her arm.

“Hallie please talk to me.” As she tried to pull away there was a commotion and Ryan’s face went white, a look of terror flashing across it. She turned just in time for a fist to come flying over her shoulder and connect solidly with Ryan’s face.

“Matty no!” She tried to grab on to the back of his T-shirt as he surged forward, punching Ryan again. He was so much bigger than her and she struggled nearly falling forward, until Noah appeared and grabbed Matt around the middle hauling him backwards. Johnny was standing looking at the scene with his mouth open and Carly was attempting to help Noah pull Matt towards towards the entrance. Hallie bit back tears and gave Ryan once last glance before she followed her friends out of the bar.

She burst through the door of her apartment not checking to see if he was behind her or not. She was so angry at him for what he had done she didn’t even want to look at him.

“Look I’m sorry okay?” He said leaning against the doorframe. The cut above his eyebrow had stopped bleeding and he was flexing his fingers, bruises beginning to bloom across his knuckles. “I just. When I saw that guy grab you like that, I don’t know. I just reacted” He looked at his hand and sighed “ it’s cuz I fucking love you okay?”

“You have to stop punching first and asking questions later. You almost punched me in the face!”

“I would never punch you in face Hal-“

“Your fist was two inches from hitting me.”

He looked at his feet embarrassed before she continued.

“And don’t think I didn’t see you flirting with that girl either!”

“What? What girl?”

“The bimbo at the bar who’s chest you couldn’t stop staring at! Thanks for making a complete idiot out of me in front of everyone!”

“This is never gonna change is it? Your never going to trust me.”

“Give me one good reason why I should?! You fill my head with air about wanting to have relationship with me then you flirt with some girl at the bar!”

They were standing ten feet apart, red faced and screaming at each other.

“I don’t need this.” He snapped grabbing his he let and leaving the room. She followed him.

“No you don’t need this and you clearly don’t need me either. Get out!”

“I am. And I won’t be coming back either.” He slammed the door behind him as she stood there, fists balled up at her sides. She listened to him walk angrily down the hallway until his footsteps could no longer be heard.

[lovingastory]

So, on the Slayers Discord we were discussing the way Lina is forced to face the consequences of her actions throughout the novels, and this sparked my Muse. I am really not used to writing fiction in English (not my first language), but I had to try. The story is set sometime after novel 17 and includes  novels’ spoilers up to that moment. It was also heavily inspired by the picture below. Hope you enjoy it! 

The warm late afternoon light flooded the fields, and the air smelled of flowers.

Gourry and I were sitting under a tree, on top of a hill. It overlooked the main road, at a safe distance from the crowds. The countryside was unusually busy – some sort of spring festival, attracting travelers from all over. We had agreed to lay low for the moment, taking side roads and (as much as I hated the discomfort) steering clear of inns.

That’s why Ran had disappeared on the path leading to the closest town. She had offered to get supplies, and ‘to let us be alone for a while’. She had a knack for making inappropriate observations, it appeared.

As if I hadn’t enough things to worry about, at the moment.

“You alright, Lina?”

I glanced at Gourry. “Yeah. Just thinking.”

“I can tell.”

I frowned, and he smiled. “This line here pops out only when you think too much.” He poked at my forehead with a finger, and I swatted it away, out of habit more than real annoyance.  

“It’s a pretty sight, though, isn’t it?”

He turned back to the landscape, and I did the same – a sea of flowers, extending as far as I could see. They were unusual blossoms, ones I didn’t remember ever seeing in our part of the continent. And yeah, they were pretty. I had been so busy stewing over our current predicament, I hadn’t even let myself enjoy the view.

Leave it to Gourry to be the observant one.

“Reminds me a bit of our peach orchards, back home,” I said.

“You’ll show them to me soon enough,” Gourry replied.

“You sure about that?”

I’d have kicked myself for sounding so whiny. What was wrong with me, lately? Yeah, I was homesick. I had accepted that, but there was nothing I could do about it, was there? Except trying to actually get home, and complaining and being depressed wasn’t going to be of any help in that.

“Why wouldn’t I be?”

He was watching me now, his fingers playing with one of the blossoms the wind had swept our way.

“It’s just…” I sighed. “Lately, I’ve been thinking about the consequences of my actions.”

“That’s new.”

“Shut up.”

He smiled, in his warm way, and I quickly looked away. I couldn’t bear it, not just now. “I’m serious.” I said. “The things I did in the past, they come with a price. The way I learned to use that spell…”

I thought he would be confused, but for once he was surprisingly quick in the uptake. “We wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for that spell,” he said. “The world as we know it wouldn’t.”

“Still. When I learned it, I didn’t know that. I was just curious to test my knowledge and my skills. That’s who I am.”

“It’s part of who you are.”  

“But maybe those people hunting us aren’t wrong. I do bring calamity with me.” I brought it on you. I couldn’t say that. Even after all that time, I still couldn’t talk of when he was taken from me.

Gourry said nothing. Because there’s nothing to say. But even as I thought it, I knew he was just waiting for me to elaborate.

“I guess I am afraid that a time will come when we don’t barely escape, or find a way to defeat the next big enemy. A time when who I am properly catches up with me.”

“Lina, you could walk the safe road all your life and still get killed in the stupidest way.”

Those words seemed to be more than just a casual remark. They made me wonder, not for the first time, about his past. We had this silent agreement, the two of us. At least, that’s how I’d come to think of it. There were things he wouldn’t ask about, and I returned the courtesy.

For some reason, what I immediately thought about was Mileena. One small cut, and you are gone. But she didn’t walk the safe road. None of us did.

“Yeah, but there is only so much tempting fate.”

“You didn’t tempt anything. You did the right thing with that Norst guy, you know.”

How could just hearing that feel so damn reassuring?

“Doing the right thing can still be very dangerous.”  

“You’re lucky that you have a proper bodyguard, then.”

In spite of myself, I found myself smiling at that.

I took in the landscape again, the pink and white of the blossoms, the blue of the sky. Yeah, it was beautiful. “I wonder if we’ll remember this, in the future, even when we get home.” I paused. “We shouldn’t overthink, should we? We should enjoy what we have while we have it.”

“That’s more like you.”

I turned to him. He wasn’t looking at the landscape, he was looking at me. He was wearing that smile again, his own kind of smile, almost too earnest. His hand was reaching for my hair.

He deposited a pink blossom there. “It suits you.” He said, jokingly.

“What doesn’t?”

He laughed, cupped my cheek with his hand. I leaned into it. I couldn’t even bring myself to pretend not to yearn for his touch anymore.

Everyone around us saw. Ran did. Even Luke had seen it and used it at our disadvantage, in his worst hour. Did I think I was protecting Gourry, by pretending those small touches, those gestures of affection were nothing? Did I think I was protecting myself – from another heartbreak, like the one Fibrizo had brought on me?

Maybe I was doing a poor job at both things. Maybe it wasn’t just sightseeing we should enjoy while we could.

“Gourry…”

“Lina-nyon!”

I startled, almost fell over. I looked down to see Ran, running up the hill, a big smile plastered on her face.

“I found food!” she announced.

Turns out she had a knack for bad timing, too.  

[skzsauce01]

A Good Man

Anniversary Request Special

Description: Seungmin loves you so much so that he wished he was the one left behind in the plane crash, not your late husband.

Warning: guilt, plane crash, death

Word Count: 2k

Pairing: fem!reader x Seungmin

Chan was a good man— loyal, loving, reliable. Seungmin is a good man too, but Seungmin is not Chan, and he knows it. He knows it well.

He approaches you, bouquet in hand. You turn and smile when you hear him.

“Hi, Seungmin.”

“Hello, Y/N. Where’s Miyeon?”

“I left her with her grandma. She isn’t quite old enough to sit still for stuff like this yet.”

“I see.” He set the flowers by the picture of his late leader. “I should leave the two of you alone then.”

“No, wait, Seungmin,” you stop him. “Would you like to have dinner with us this evening?” 

You’re inviting him to dinner? His eyes slide to Chan’s framed smiling face. No, he mustn’t get his hopes up. There probably isn’t something more to this invitation. You probably just don’t want to be alone on your late husband’s fifth death anniversary. “Sure. Where? I’ll see if any of the boys are free too.”

“No, I meant just the three of us at my place,” you clarify. “I… I have something to say.” 

Seungmin can’t stop his heart from accelerating even though he knows it’ll hurt more later. “O-okay.”

You nod and turn back to the memorial. Seungmin watches as you whisper something into the single white carnation in your hand and set it on the altar before he himself turns to give you room.

He finds it ironic that he was actually the reason why you and Chan were together. You were his classmate whom he reunited with when Stray Kids did a reality show at a site you worked. He was even the best man at your wedding. He remembers that day clearly— that day when he saw you walking down the aisle dressed in white. He’d never felt so sick as he did then when realization and regret hit him all at once. He loves you. Since when, and for how long, he didn’t and doesn’t know, but it was and is too late. 

He finds it even more ironic, however, that he is the reason you two are now torn apart.

He raises his finger and presses the bell. Within seconds, the door is thrown open wide and a bubbly five year old greets him. “Hello, Uncle Seungmin!”

He automatically bends down and scoops the child up. “Hi there, Miyeon. Have you been a good girl today?”

“Uh-huh! You can ask Mommy!”

As if on cue, you pop out from the kitchen. “Yes, she’s been a well-behaved angel. Welcome in, Seungmin.” 

You take the melon he’d brought while he takes off his shoes. Seungmin’s a bit surprised to see three lit candles on the dining table when he walks in, but says nothing of it. He does, however, raise an eyebrow when you off-handedly mention you baked his favourite chocolate cake. He knows the recipe calls for red wine, and for a single mother such as you, anything that does not involve your child usually does not fit into your schedule, let alone cross your mind. 

After dinner, you take your daughter to her playroom upstairs with a large plate of cookies that are obviously meant to keep her distracted for a while.

Seungmin watches as you scurry back downstairs afterwards. You’re wearing a skirt. He doesn’t remember you wearing a skirt since you gave birth. He thinks you’re gorgeous in anything, but the effort you put into looking nice makes him blush a shade darker.

“Shall we?” you dramatize, pulling out the dessert.

Seungmin helps lay out two plates while you serve a slice onto each.

“You mentioned you have something to say?” he asks as you both tuck your chairs in.

Are you blushing, or is it just the heat from these candles?

“I, uh… Let’s eat first.” You smile sheepishly. “I haven’t had this in so long.”

Despite having his favourite dessert, Seungmin cannot concentrate on its taste at all. He watches as you cut through the moist cake with your fork. He can tell you’re nervous by the way your joints are turning white by your grip on the utensil. He’s used to being the anxious one, so this is new. What could have gotten you so on edge?

At last, you’ve scraped every last drop of cream you can procrastinate with into your mouth. Seungmin takes the plates and sets them into the sink before sitting back down in front of you, waiting patiently.

“What I want to say is,” you begin carefully. 

He nods once and leans forward, letting you know you have his attention.

“We’ve known each other for a while now, haven’t we?”

“Yes, why?” Goodness, this sounds like a line from every other friends-to-lover romcom skit. Not that he would mind. As long as you tell him you feel the same way he does, he wouldn’t care if you quoted “Twilight” verbatim. Oh, to be in a lighthearted romcom with you, Seungmin dreams of nothing more. Then again, he reminds himself, these are just dreams.

“Ever since… ever since Chan passed, we grew closer, and I depended on you a lot. You’ve been my cornerstone, and I wanted to say ‘thank you.’”

He nods again, but doesn’t say anything. He knows you enough by now to recognize you have more on your mind.

Indeed, you continue. “And over these past five years, my heart has—”

“Mommy!” A sudden cry sends you both to your feet. 

“I’ll tell you later,” you toss over your shoulder to Seungmin who’s running right on your heels towards the cry.

“Miyeon!” you gasp, seeing the state of your daughter. Somehow, she has managed to squeeze through the gaps between the railing of the stairs and is hanging from the second floor. Below her, her stuffed monkey lays sprawled out on ground level.

“I’ll pull her up,” you decide, but Seungmin stops you.

“It’ll be hard to fit her back through those rails, and she’s crying too much to cooperate.” He stands under your daughter and extends his arms upwards. “Miyeon? Miyeon, let go. Uncle Seungmin will catch you. You’re going to be alright.”

The little girl stops wailing for a moment and looks down only to cry again from the intimidating height.

“Sweetie, it’s okay. You can do it. We won’t let you fall,” you add in. “You trust us, don’t you? You trust Mommy and Uncle Seungmin?”

She quiets down again and sniffles as she looks at you and Seungmin now instead of the floor. Her tiny arms are shaking, and you brace yourself, knowing she’s going to fall soon whether she wants to or not.

Miyeon whimpers once more and closes her eyes. She then finally releases her grip and lands squarely into Seungmin’s awaiting arms.

“Oof. There we go. Safe and sound,” he assures her. 

Once she’s set on the floor, Miyeon again begins to bawl from shock. “Mr— Mr. Bananas wanted to climb. Mr. Bananas wanted to climb!” she sobs, gripping the stuffed animal you’ve returned back to her arms.

“Okay, okay, we understand. Still, no more climbing for you or Mr. Bananas, alright?” hushes Seungmin.

You pick up your daughter and bounce her on your shoulder. “I think she’s learned her lesson. I didn’t think we still needed baby rails, but I guess you can never be safe enough.”

Seungmin reaches for Miyeon. “Let’s put her to bed. She must be exhausted after all that.”

You nod and let him carry the five year old up the stairs once more. You have him wait downstairs though as you change the child, so he heads back down and makes himself comfortable on the couch. On the lamp table beside him, there’s a photo of you and Chan excitedly holding up an ultrasound. It is the only picture of the three of you together.

He runs this thumb over the other man’s face, wiping it free of any dust. “I’m sorry…” he whispers. “I know it’s not worth much, but I’ll keep Y/N and Miyeon safe and happy. I promise.” 

He quickly sets down the picture and stands when he hears you closing the bedroom door. 

“Is she alright?” Seungmin asks when he sees your head appear from around the corner.

You nod, descending the steps quietly. “She’s sleeping now. She’ll forget all about it by tomorrow morning.”

“I wish I could say the same when I get hurt. I can’t even sit in certain positions anymore,” he jokes.

You laugh lightly. “I’m glad you were here, Seungmin. Things could have been a lot different if it were just me.”

“I’m always happy to help. I should get going now though. You must be tired too.”

“Wait.” Your voice stops him at the front door. “The accident… I’m thankful you were here, and I realized it had to be you. You had to be the one to do it.”

His stupid hope is rising again. He can feel it in his chest. “Y/N, what are you saying?”

“Miyeon, she wouldn’t have trusted anyone except you. She needs you, and I… I need you too.” 

Is he hearing incorrectly? His silence and bewilderment prompts you to explain. “The thing is, ever since Chan passed five years ago, you were the only one who’s been by my side, supporting and caring for me, and slowly, I’ve fallen for that. Seungmin, I know I come with a lot of baggage, but would you be willing to give us a try?”

He wants to jump, he wants to cheer, he wants to accept your confession, but none of this makes sense to logical Seungmin, so he restrains himself.

“Y/N, do you realize what you’re saying?”

You nod. “I-I know it’s sudden, but I like you, Kim Seungmin.”

“But you love Chan.”

You hesitate but nod in agreement anyway. “I’m not going to put you second. I—”

“Y/N, I killed Chan. Don’t you see? You should hate me instead. If it weren’t for me, you’d still have your husband, and Miyeon would still have a dad. If I hadn’t stood under that propeller after the plane crash, Chan wouldn’t have had to push me and get crushed in the head. I killed Chan, and no matter what I do— no matter how much I love you too— I can never stand in his place.”

You take a moment to stare at him, trying to read his body language after that confession of insecurity. After a while, you straighten your back and look him right in the eyes.

“You’re right.” He’s startled by your sudden firm tone. “You can never be Chan. You’re not a music-producing insomniac. You’re not Australian. You’re not born with curly hair.”

He swallows and hangs his head.

“But,” you continue. “I’m not looking for another Chan. I’m not looking to replace him; I’m looking for you.”

“Y/N…”

You soften your voice. “When I found out how he passed saving you, I knew I was going to be okay. I knew Chan wouldn’t leave me and his unborn child to fend for ourselves. He saved you because he knew he could count on you, and it’s why I trusted you from the beginning and why I let myself fall in love again.”

You walk up to him and take his hands. “Let me ask this again. Will you, Kim Seungmin, stand by my side, not as Chan, but as someone who loves and is loved?”

His heart pounds in his head, yet he cannot take his eyes off of yours. His throat is tied into knots, yet he cannot stop the words from tumbling out.

“Nothing would make me happier,” he breathes. 

You smile and wrap him in a hug, which he finally returns. Just then, footsteps thump down the stairs and a five year old child waddles into view.

“Mommy?” she calls. She then takes a moment to look around before her eyes land on Seungmin. “Daddy?”