#Less Romance
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conversations of amatonormativity and consent overlap a lot and should be discussed side by side more frequently. because when you live in a society that teaches you that you’re supposed to want sex and romance, that you may want to say no in the moment but you shouldn’t say no forever, any statements about consent get muddied. you cannot at once preach that consent is vital and “you can always say no” and also insist that people should give sex and romance a try, even when they express disinterest, telling them “eventually you’ll find the right person.”
#also people who are really strict about consent when it comes to sex#seem much less concerned when it comes to romance#and then suddenly pressuring is fine and even charming depending on its presentation#aromantic#aspec#aromantic awareness week#asexual#hd posts#amatonormativity
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Honestly this gets at my chiefest complaint/frustration/discomfort with fandom as a whole. Which is: in their rush to defend the artistic merit of fanworks I think a ton of people have really valorized transformation and remixing and reinterpretation in and of themselves, when imo those are all quite neutral actions. When done well, they can expand and build upon and subvert meaning in really powerful and thought-provoking (and fun!) ways. When done poorly, they are just as likely to flatten and oversimplify and decontextualize and completely erase meaning. The simple act of changing something does not imbue the choice to do so with creative validity. It is entirely possible for a cover song to be bad (or just boring!). To exactly the same degree that it is possible to transform a pretty shallow and straightforward work into something deeper and more nuanced and subversive, is possible to transform a work into a vastly shallower and less interesting shadow of itself. As with nearly everything in art, it's all about the execution!
But the second you voice this position (which should honestly be a pretty uncontroversial one imo), you get people shrieking at you about being gatekeep-y and pretentious and betraying the sacred fandom etiquette of Don't-Like-Don't-Read.
And like...listen. I was not raised in a barn. I am 150% capable of quietly back-buttoning out of a fanfic I think is bad or boring - which is exactly what I do when I encounter them - and I am obviously not advocating for stupid ships wars or any kind of harassment or leaving hatemail in people's AO3 inboxes. (Which some people will also accuse you of the second you say anything less than lavishly positive about fandom, in true piss-on-the-poor fashion.) Literally all I am saying is that you can't have your cake and eat it too - that if fandom and fanworks (in the broadest sense) have artistic merit then fandom and fanworks (in the broadest sense) are fair game for artistic critique. Which means, in practice, that I can go on my own blog and make a post exactly like this one - critiquing broad trends, or stating that some interpretations are bad actually, or pointing out that subverting or talking back to or reading against the grain of canon is very different from simply ignoring it, or saying "fandom's culture of collage/remix/fuck-canon-I-do-what-I-want can lend itself to to really creative and interesting art but also to a lot of really bland homogenized cut-n-paste art, not to mention some pretty troubling decontextualization." And that if you feel this rains on your personal parade, you are then free to DLDR by back-buttoning out of my blog and/or blocking me so you never have to see my hot takes again, rather than clamoring in my notes about how I should let people enjoy things.
#i am enjoying myself! if my preferred mode of fannish engagement is different than yours you can go nobody is stopping you#i'm just tired of people acting like chucking canon out the window only ever leads to beautifully subversive queer romance#just as often it leads to people chucking out anything unique or challenging or thought-provoking in the original text#in favor of making two personality-less background white guys kiss to the tune of plot beats we've all seen 10 billion times#i'm not even condemning anyone for enjoying a tropey low stakes romance sometimes!#but i AM allowed to observe that fandom has a marked preference for tropey low stakes romance#over (eg) touching ANY canon engagement with imperialism with a thirty foot pole#and to like. draw some critical conclusions about that lol#fandom#my posts
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"MC was stolen away by the monster because it wanted to breed them"
"MC had was forced onto an arranged marriage with an evil overlord"
"MC was made to-"
Blah blah, give me an MC that leaps at the opportunity to be with the monster/overlord/whatever morally grey character!!
An Orc threatens their village if the MC doesn't join their clan because they want them all to themselves? Hell yes! MC is already packing their belongings and leaping into the tree trunks that are arms.
Overlord/lady apologises to MC that they were saddled with this horrible marriage? What do you MEAN? You're the best damn spouse they could ask for! Moonlit walks through a Gothic castle and blooming gardens? A library? Minions?! Who on earth would pass this up?
A monster offers trinkets to MC as courting gifts, hoping they won't be terrified by their grotesque figure. MC is making little gifts back and keeps the window open to their bedroom on cold nights so the monster comes in for warm cuddles.
Give me an MC that is ecstatic to be chosen by the thing everyone is terrified of! I want a love story without the "but they're evil/a monster" bullshit!
#dont get me wrong#i love the arranged marriage/forced companionship trope (to a degree)#but i want one where the MC is ALL for it#if anyone has any good recommendations for books/shows/fics#please give me!#i want more romance but less of the questioning everything sides#writing#romance writing#monster lover#monster fucker#monster boyfriend#reader insert#lemon#monster girlfriend#monster#monster x reader#monster wife#overlord#overlady
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DA2 companions: Family edition
#Aveline and Varric are honorary Hawkes ofc#I'm gonna add a small reference to hawke to each companion (except the hawke siblings). kinda like the romance outfits but more subtle#anyways. this is ancient it's been in my drafts for months but gave them a few touch ups and they look a little bit less like ass#varric and aveline I drew this past week and I feel like it's very obvious but I'm not redrawing the other 3 just for stylistic coherence#dragon age#dragon age 2#dragon age ii#da2#da2 fanart#da fanart#dragon age fanart#carver hawke#bethany hawke#aveline vallen#varric tethras
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lucanis is a 'I could sit in our quiet kitchen on a grey tuesday afternoon drinking coffee and talking with you about nothing much in particular forever and be the happiest man who ever lived' romantic, not a 'classic tropes and grand gestures' romantic. this is a distinction and conceptual gap I personally feel is crucial to understanding what's going on with him when romanced. for all his almost painful sincerity and clear depth of feeling he's not a very effusive guy by nature, but in the history of time no one has ever, with their whole soul, chest and being, been so genuinely and openly happy to just do laundry and taxes with you.
#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#lucanis dellamorte#rookanis#rook x lucanis#his enchanting bordering on comical low-keyness in all his dealings and quiet but unflinching devotion is the point!#that is where the joy is stored. To Me. the mutual 'your company could make hell paradise to me' level of just...#*liking* between him and rook gets to me. they're best friends who enjoy doing everything together and also in love.#diversity win two demisexuals living the dream out there and incidentally also sometimes killing dragons together <3#it's less about the butterflies in my stomach excited love more about the calm safe home/best friend kind of love. if you see what I mean#less dramatic and narratively explosive more realistic and soothing and exactly my shit haha#also I think he's autistic and leaning on romance tropes is more like scripting for him (not inauthentic in terms of the feelings#just some 'well as I understand these are the steps to *express* these feelings' not quite spontaneity going on)#but that is very much a personal headcanon and fully vibes-based and no one has to agree with me on it haha#if/when he proposes to rye I don't think he plans it all out or anything he'd just gaze at him in some very mundane everyday situation#and suddenly go '...hey do you want to get married' like he's noting that they're low on onions or something#because he's so utterly enchanted with rook's existence and being anything else seems kind of irrelevant right then#(rye knows him very well and is not particularly taken aback by this. if anything he'd been fretting#over popping the much bigger question of whether lucanis wants to get buried side by side with him lol#(reader... he said yes. and they were gravemates. (oh my god they were gravmates)))
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And please tell me why you'd want your chosen studio to take over in the tags!! :] Orrr why you don't trust any of them >:]
#dragon age#polls#I'd get too salty if I said why I wouldn't want larian or bethesda to take over. and idk owlcat very well#but obsidian is my choice if need be#the game would probably be short and there may be no romances but obsidian is usually good at creating solid games#mostly non-offensive too. I just wish they'd represent m/m romances better and be a little less creepy with their f!npcs ngl
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4. 星际幼儿园 (Interstellar Kindergarten)
Interstellar Transmigration
Author : 水晶翡翠肉
JJ ID: 5403971
SJ: Clear
CF: None
Tofu: None
Others: Less Romance, Focus is on childcare.
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bandom gay allegations
extended edition of this diagram i made some months ago. as always, feel free to scream at me about all the ones i missed
#i tried to find a way to make this less of a mess and i just couldnt so here you go#bandom#im Not tagging everyone im sorry#my chemical romance#decaydance#fall out boy#patrick stump#andy hurley#joe trohman#william beckett#pete wentz#gerard way#frank iero#mikey way#ray toro#panic! at the disco#ryan ross#awsten knight#travie mccoy
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the way that one line from the new epilogue in an astarion romance is going to HAUNT me

just. what a profoundly intense thing to confess to someone.
like, just these six months of newfound happiness with you exerts a force on his heart equal and in direct opposition to two centuries of endless torment, the gnawing hunger and exploitation. this flashbulb-bright fraction of his long life holds the same gravity to him as years upon years of darkness and suffering.
in all likelihood, he hasn’t even known his lover for as long as his worst memory lasted, that year sealed away to go mad from starvation and sensory deprivation, yet he still tells them this brief time has been so fundamentally and powerfully important that the weight of even that unimaginable hell is vanishingly small compared to this present he has now and the future ahead of them both.
how am i supposed to act normal about this.
#i need to lay down#just drop this in there right at the beginning why not!#that’s INTENSE. and completely sincere considering his demeanor at the party. god#he’s so… nice. in the romanced epilogue. i expected him to be a little smug and jokey#if tav told him the others weren’t doing so hot without the two of them around#but he takes it so genuinely and with visible disappointment?? literally shocked me#i thought he would say oh of course their lives have taken a turn without our impressive leadership lol!#and then redirect into something a little less flippant#but man. he just gets sad. astarion six months into a loving relationship is like a stray cat that instantly gets cuddly when you adopt it#dude went cotton candy marshmallow saccharine sweet in a HEARTBEAT#bless the others with your presence he says. i’ll always be here he says. we have forever after all he says.#head in my hands. how could they do this to me#astarion ancunin#astarion bg3#astarion#bg3 epilogue spoilers#bg3 spoilers#baldur’s gate 3 spoilers#bg3
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This wine tastes like pigs blood!
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#lan wangji#jin zixun#wei wuxian#su she#(Su She needs to have his carrie moment before he can have his Carrie Moment.#Which means he needs to exist as a punching bag before he can hit 'em with the rebound).#My first draft of this comic had WWX slurping LWJ's wine per actual scene canon#As it really is a great scene of how WWX is willing to absorb the scandal and harm that befalls others.#It had a lot less to do with it being LWJ and more so that WWX just happens to be the kind of person who refuses to turn a blind eye.#It could have been any Lan who was being pressured (inappropriately) to drink (do not pressure anyone to drink irl PLEASE).#Because this is a romance plot it of course *is* LWJ. But don't forget that in this moment they aren't on great terms.#It's not a knight in shining armor moment - it's a 'you were being treated unjustly and I have the power to absolve you from that.'#And as we are very soon about to see - WWX certainly cannot turn away from those who need aid he can provide.#And like Jin Guangyao; that kindness is also his downfall.#By the way - that you all for the amazing community commentary on the last comic. I really loved reading everyone's thoughts!#Suyao shippers...I get it now. You had me at 'wen ning and WWX parallels'. I'll be back with a treat for you soon.#And yes 'everyone' does include the ironically named tumblr user jin zixun.#Who blocked me right before the character makes his pd-mdzs debut.#I hope you are well. You seem like you were having a real bad time yesterday.
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The idea of Zuko discovering that he has feelings for Katara after he joins the Gaang is just so delicious to me. Like the idea of this boy wrestling with a crush that (he thinks) will never be returned because she’s clearly determined to hate him forever - that’s like candy to me.
Even after they’ve resolved the conflict between them, my favorite headcanon is that Zuko is completely convinced Katara would never be interested in him as more than a friend, and frankly, he feels honored that she would even offer him that much.
Meanwhile, Katara is like actively having an inner meltdown over the fact that there’s a WAR going on, and she can’t stop fantasizing about kissing this boy who was her enemy until 5 seconds ago.
just *chef’s kiss*
#I just love pining when the character is determined to not allow the pining to get in the way of their very genuine love for their crush#And I think that’s exactly how they would both be#Just like yeah I’m in love with that person#And they will never love me back but it will never make me love them less#Ride or die romance#Even better when BOTH characters act this way hahaha#zutara#zuko x katara
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the choice between Edward & Jacob is not a question of which relationship is healthier or which partner is best suitable for Bella. neither is correct. neither is best. neither produces a happy ending for Bella. at the end of the day this is still a vampire novel. any choice Bella could make would yield, at best, a bittersweet happily ever after.
if she chooses Edward, she gets the terrifying Breaking Dawn ending: a girl who rejected her call to grow up has hung her love & her eternity on an emotionally stunted partner who hates himself marginally less than he loves her. she's a teen mom with a kid she never wanted who perpetuates the generational trauma passed down from her parents. by keeping this child, the Cullens have set the stage for an uprising/cold war against the Volturi who are likely to take revenge in order to maintain power. Bella is living in a tenuous "dream come true" wrapped in a nightmare & doesn't realize it.
choosing Jacob is the true coming-of-age ending that rips the stitches out of a wound that never fully healed. even if we ignore the fact that she ends up with a man who sexually assaulted her (we must bear in mind Jacob's character is influenced by smeyer's racism, but it did happen), they can't have a secure romantic relationship. based on the high imprinting rate of the pack, Jacob will likely find his imprint in his lifetime & will lose himself to the imprintee. he will no longer be her Jacob. he will inevitably abandon her (whether he wants to or not), & she must reconcile with the reality that she will always be inadequate to Jacob's imprint. & say he never manages to escape the vampires? he will presumably not age for a long time, meaning the relationship Bella always feared with Edward (her being an old grandmother while he stays forever young) remains a possibility. this is the story of a girl who slaps a Band Aid on an open wound & calls herself healed while flinching every time she sees the shadow of the knife that cut her.
if she chooses neither (team therapy), her healing requires her to lose or be at least partially disconnected from everyone she cares about. Bella must spend the rest of her life shut out from one world while never fully existing in her human world ever again. she must always keep secrets. she can never go back home. even in the unlikely event that she manages to escape the Volturi, the threat of being hunted by vampires will never leave her. in addition, she must face her worst fears (aging, losing Edward) while always keeping in mind the immortal life that could have been hers, if only.
even the "healthiest" option produces scars that will never quite heal.
Twilight is a horror. Twilight is a vampire novel. Twilight is gothic. Twilight is fiction. neither Edward nor Jacob is a "bad" choice because neither will give Bella her happily ever after. the choice between Edward & Jacob is simply a matter of which horror story you prefer to read.
#twilight#twilight renaissance#bella swan#the twilight saga#edward cullen#twilight saga#twilight meta#not to be a downer but the edward/jacob feud is silly#i understand this feud will continue in perpetuity because controversy & drama will always garner attention in online spaces etc#but the idea that either of these men will provide the happy story some people in this fandom want is an illusion#because no matter what happens The Twilight Saga still operates in the context of the vampire/gothic genre which by design can't produce#a 100% happy ending.#'oh but it's a YA romance so-' yeah so the black walls get wallpapered. they're still black underneath & nothing changes that#'this story is a romance' and 'this story is a horror story' are two ideas that can coexist.#i wish we were able to debate the choice between Edward & Jacob while still bearing in mind neither choice is wrong#i think this fandom would be a lot less toxic & mean to each other for no fuckin reason but oh well
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i’m putting them all in the 1850s now. starting with these two for no particular reason
this might be a really specific niche that nobody cares about except me, but it doesn’t matter. i can draw whatever i want.
i’m not a huge fashion person so if things are off don’t be super mean to me
#humanstuck#homestuck#vriska serket#equius zahhak#neigh8ors#?#they HAVE to be french and german (prussian technically) you know? they HAVE to#they’re still 16 here just to make things less confusing#is this even homestuck fanart anymore#their hair is all wrong…#this won’t be a romance by the way
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zzzzz
#hypnos hades#fanart#hades game#hades 2#hades#art#PLEASE I BEG OF YOU I NEED TO ROMANCE HIM#please please please please#ahem#anyways#i watched the technical test and blanked out and 30 minutes later this was on my laptop screen#i have an essay due in less than 2 hours but we ball#hypnos my baby boy.... ough.......#crawls back into the crevice from whence i came
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Gideon would not be some suave fuckboy picking up chicks like skittles and somehow having Harrow as the person that settles her--Gideon has been starving for home and belonging since before she was born, Gideon doesn't know how to interact with strangers even if she barks out something aggressive or recites some line she's read, Gideon nearly blacks out when a girl she finds pretty implies the most minuscule of interest in her.
Gideon is also, without question, submissive when it comes to her relationships, and while she spits like a startled cat at Harrow (rightfully so, I will point out, as their relationship before Canaan House was violent and cruel and oppressive), she responds immediately and desperately to even the faintest taste of approval.
Even when we're in her head, even when we see her make some brazen statement or thought, even when she lashes out and tries to be bigger and bolder than she feels, we still see how awkward she is. She's an unsocialized teenager without peers. She's an absolute mess with no experience. She's the isolated teen who learned everything from material marked as too explicit for her a bit too young and took the scripts of them and then nearly choked on the reality of talking to a pretty girl who wasn't beating the shit out of her in a circumstance she could rightfully resent.
She sat there wanting Harrow to kiss her so bad, Nona dipped down to offer her relief that fell hollow as soon as Gideon knew it wasn't from her morbid mistress of bones. She's a performative little shit. An anxious, floundering, helpless butch who is quite literally dying to have someone use her, want her, and who doesn't know what to do with it other than artlessly throw up her feathers.
#now HARROW#what holds Harrow back is being an incredibly repressed nun who needs to feel 'inspired' in some way to act#but she WILL act#and I don't even think she questions it a lot#she's had people hyping her up her whole life and I think her confusion with romance is less about feeling insecure#and more about feeling undeserving due to the nature of what she has cost and what her responsibilities are#gideon nav#tlt
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