#Let's be honest author just doesn't know how to write women it's. it's literally that.

[kyouka-supremacy]

uh, i agree with lack of female characters in bsd :( so disappointing. i am angry how authors push them in the far back. at least kyouka, yosano, and lucy got their spotlight! this is why yosano's backstory is so important <3

Ye I knowwwww let's talk about it bestie 😔😔

All the female characters have so much potential and their abilities are pretty cool yet they barely get any screentime ;;;;;; Really praying we'll get to see any more of them soon, even if it's Teruko. And Yosano's story was amazing!!! It added so much depth to the character, unironically I consider it the peak of bsd. Anyways stan all of bsd women ❤️❤️❤️

[canonfeminine]

　　HERE'S YOUR COFFEE.. AND MY NUMBER

☕ . . . Barista! Leo Valdez x Customer! Reader.

in which: Leo has a favorite customer, and it's most definitely you.

authors note: I don't have much to say for this one LOL. I'm writing this right after I post my poll to see what fic you guys would like from me so this is one of the options ! also I like to think that the store Leo works at is a mom and pop shop and the parents who run the place love Leo and gave him the job as soon as the place opened 🤭

warnings: literally none

Was it wrong for Leo to have a favorite?

He didn't think so. I mean, It's not like it was obvious. His job was to make caffeine drinks for teenagers, college students, and thirty year old women with two kids. Who would know (or care) that he liked one customer more than another. As long as the quality wasn't getting worse for one customer and way better for a second one.. Why do they care?

When Leo says they, he means his coworkers. He might have talked about one customer a little too much (and how pretty they were) and one day, the people who worked around him were like: "Wait.. do you have a crush on one of the customers?"

Which Leo responded with: "Uhm.. No?" (He's rubbing the back of his neck and blushing like crazy. He also sucks at lying)

So ever since that day, Leo's wonderful peers have been his wingmen and wingwoman. Every time they'd have a break, the people on the job would go into the back and talk about ways Leo could smoothly give you his number. At first, the meetings were really embarrassing. They'd often joke around about how Leo had a crush on somebody who he only saw for a good few minutes a day, but as it went on for longer, they would actually give some good advice.

So Leo, taking all the advice he'd learned from his fellow people's, decided to shoot his shot. And he didn't just pick a random day, no, he might have checked the weather for the week and picked the coldest day because, lets be honest, who doesn't want a hot drink on a cold day?

The day you came into the shop was definitely cold, but that didn't stop you from wearing something cute. As soon as one of Leo's coworkers saw you, she basically pushed Leo to the front desk without saying a word. "What in the world are you—" he stopped talking when he saw you walking up to the front desk. "Well, look who it is." He smirked.

"Hi, Leo." You smiled back, glancing at his name tag and back at him. Not that you had forgotten his name, but it was hard to remember stuff when you were around him. "Can I get a [insert usually order] please?" you asked.

"And will that be a to-go order?"

"Unfortunately, yes. I have a job interview in like.. " You turned your phone on to check the time. "thirty minutes? and I can't be low on energy. I'm trying to get the job, not lose it. "

Leo laughed. "I bet either way you'd get it." If his eyes could form hearts, it would. you were so, so pretty.

[ little time skip hehe ]

It didn't take that long for you drink to come to you (mostly because Leo was high on energy and was making it for you) But before he gave you the drink, he wrote a little something on the side of your cup.

"I'm going to be very honest, you're cute. I'm going to put my number below this just in case you think i'm cute too." He signed the letter with his name and a little red heart that he used a red sharpie to make.

"Here's your drink." Leo handed the coffee cup to you, purposely giving it to you in a way so that your hands could slightly touch. "Thank youu." You said, smiling. "See you next time I come in?" You asked.

"See you next time." He shoot you a pair of finger guns (which was extremely nerd & cute thing for him to do.) "Good luck on your job interview!" he said before you walked out the door. He wasn't happy that you had to leave, but at least you leaving meant his heart wouldn't beat so fast. The only this that he could hope was that you saw his note on the side of your coffee cup.

[aris-ink]

I'm so tired of hearing everyone being pressed about that tea blog, even right now I'm getting dms. it's an honest place that provides receipts and warns readers which content creators to stay away from? the person who runs the blog and the anons there talk about tremendously important things, and only encourage action bullying and harassment for real offenses that people deserve to hear about.

like for example:

sexualising santa by writing christmas fics

including corruption kink in fics. (especially if you're someone who slept around. us sluts have to stop hurting innocent women by writing fanfiction 😔)

having fun with astrology (don't you know that's the devil's tool, you zodiac freaks?)

having a kofi. what's wrong with you? so you tell me you spend hours writing and editing and you dare to suggest someone gives you a tip for it? 😭

being upset about not getting enough engagement. clearly you're just untalented and bitter, darling. 💖

other readers enjoying things they don't. (that's just going too far.)

being religious and liking bts/expressing sexuality. um, don't you know if you believe in God you should be on your knees in church looking at Jesus instead of Jungkook's abs? 🤨 in fact, you should be on your way to becoming a nun, so...

writing yandere fics.

this is all so true. hey, anyone here ever read or watched twilight? oh? I hope you didn't, because we all know fiction equals reality so..... I'd be really concerned for the local morgues.

AHSHDHDHDDH anyways, now that I'm done with the sarcasm, as always, please give me a break. I've reached the image limit but I'm sorry. making fun of authors for how they write, encouraging our works to be reported, making fun of authors with kofis or who express their feelings towards little engagement.... telling a Muslim woman that she cannot be Muslim and write her fics (the fucking audacity), then making fun of her for getting stalked. treating people who enjoy/write fics that include sex and aren't "pure" as less and depraved. accusing writers of sending asks to themselves when they get a nice message. twisting their words. this behavior is absolutely disgusting, but besides that it's so lacking in logic and critical thinking skills that it's just sad, and this is who is getting you down, guys? 😭

you're wonderful, keep doing you, and let these amazing little anons and blog runner keep doing them. 🤷‍♀️ YOU know who you are, your followers know who you are, and it doesn't matter what a bunch of bullies have to say. I personally don't care either. what they gonna do? report my fics? I got enough followers to get around, they're enough for me. send me a rude message? oh no, anything but that.

😭💀 sending lots of love to anyone who ever felt alone and targeted. I promise you, literally no one who is worth your time cares. ❤️

[magical-bigbang-noona]

More toxic 💩 driving me crazy how stans will turn a blind eye to anything their idols do.

WTF is wrong with Kim Heechul? I mean, he's another one who I felt was problematic but again, even I shrugged some of it off. Now he's giving a not really much of an apology for his latest drunk screw up on a friend's video blog.

Yeah, he was drunk. That's not an excuse. The stuff he said against feminists and one certain group of women was ignorant and offensive, though not surprising from a privileged Korean male. Korea is not exactly the capitol of feminist tolerance. Still not an excuse.

He gave the standard "if what I said bothered you" &" I'm sorry you felt that way" victim blaming, non apology which is classic passive aggressive no responsibility taken, sorry not sorry, the problem is with you not me crap.

I stupidly looked at the comments and almost unanimously are the female stans saying he was just "telling it like it is" and has nothing to be sorry for. Wow. How these girls can just throw their own gender under the bus for a crush I will never comprehend and hope I never do.

Same with Kris Wu. Yes, sentencing in China is harsh, but you know, maybe he shouldn't have been RAPING GIRLS while he was a celebrity there. But we got girls crying over his prison sentence and how long it is and blah blah blah.

And once again, I'm pissed because while I wasn't into his music I did like his work as an actor. Yet again, warning niggles for years like I had with S* but yeah, I ignored them too. And that is on me. I'm not claiming I'm completely immune,I need to learn to not ignore red flags, but when I'm faced with proof that a celebrity I had a crush on or admired committed crimes against another human or willingly broke laws with full knowledge of what they were doing and are not really sorry for it other than getting caught then yea, I usually feel horrible and betrayed and then write them out of my life. Not slam the blinders down and go, nah, I like him so he couldn't have done that, end of story.

Take Deng Lun aka Allen Deng, another C-drama celeb I loved. Watched a bunch of his serials. Then he gets indicted in the Chinese crackdown of celebrity tax evasion. Like, in the millions of dollars, somewhere in the neighborhood of 16 million USD. He knew what he did, he deliberately hid his income, he said he did it because "everyone was doing it" (sound familiar?). To be honest a lot were and yes, it was quietly ignored for years til citizens made such a big protest about the differences in treatment that the authorities decided to make a show of coming down on celeb tax dodgers.

He was wildly popular and then literally lost all of his jobs and lucrative endorsements overnight. And fans were crying and metaphorically rending their shirts, saying they are with him and he didn't deserve to lose his status and poor him, we need to let him know he didn't do anything wrong, and meanwhile I'm just upset that someone I liked so much was involved in that.

Just because someone is a celebrity it doesn't mean they couldn't possibly commit crime. Or if they did they had to be a completely clueless, innocent babe in the woods and it's not their fault.

Take TOP. He was and is my bias. Do I think Korea's laws on certain prescription drugs and marijuana is unnecessarily strict? Yes. Doesn't matter.

Do I think he had reasons he turned to marijuana use? Yes. But he still knew how stringent the laws were, he used it, and got caught. And yeah, he lied too at first. Am I happy about that? No. But the situation was what it was.

Regardless of his mental state, and personally, if you think mental health care is bad in the States it's pretty much non existent in comparison in Korea, he was aware of the laws and as a citizen he has to adhere to the law, even if I, a fan in the States, thinks it's stupid and too harsh.

He screwed up. He was liable, he paid his penalty with lenience that yes, considering his life long mental health conditions is justifiable,and the fact that he was so sorry and upset he took an overdose and almost died was also a factor, he admitted his guilt, he was truly sorry for everything, he got the help he needed, and carried out the rest of his duties as quietly as the press would let him.

I never thought of him as a saint who did no wrong. That he deserved none of his penance and was a lily white angel just because I like the man a lot.

I mean, this is simplifying it all, and don't get me started on the almost repeat of the same situation with B.I. of iKon and how I thought and still think YG is a swirling cesspool that harbored a lot of shady crap and when the pins were down they threw their own artists under the bus to protect themselves. They made for a bad environment IMO and yes, I even hold the Co. and YG himself as a terrible influence on S* and feel it all had more than a hand in that whole mess. But in the end, S was a 30 yr old man, not a child, and he knew damn well what he was doing and what the people he was associating himself with were like.

As the saying goes, you lay down with dogs, you get up with fleas. So the continuous infantilising of him and saying how he never could have possibly even put a toe out of line knowingly just because you can't deal with your crush not being a blameless ethereal being is just infuriating to me and always will be.

[addoration]

hey! what's this odyssey retelling that everyone is so heated about? no one is saying its name/the author's name in their posts or tags and i can't find it on google. thanks😅

the author's name is sarah underwood and i believe? the upcoming book's name? is "lies we sing to the sea" - it claims to be a "sapphic and feminist retelling of the odyssey."

idk how much you know but there was an interview a while back circulating (which has been since taken down so i can't link it) where she claimed that she hadn't read the whole source text (ie the odyssey) and ofc that got people upset because how can you claim to write a quality retelling if you don't even know the whole of the material? i mean, sure, you could argue that you only need to read the parts relevant to the retelling - but lets be honest: everything informs and connects to everything else. the context is important. everything is so inter-connected and holistic that i personally believe that to not read the whole source material when writing a retelling of it is foolish. i understand that the text can be daunting and a bit inaccessible, particularly if one doesn't have a background in classics or if one is using a verse/older translation. however there are multiple guides out there that help make it more easy to break into, plus audiobooks on youtube exist i believe! imo there is literally no excuse.

im pretty sure i rb'ed a post a while ago with screenshots from the interview but i can't find it on my blog now, so i don't think i tagged it :/ but if i remember correctly? she also admitted to reading and keeping up with what sells well, with the implication that she's writing in a similar style/genre simply in order to make money. n i mean - i get it! authors need to live too. but i personally found her easy admittance of this fact a bit of a suggestion that she doesn't really care about what she's writing, and simply wants to make money off it. the fact that she hasn't fully read the odyssey doesn't help her case. is she really passionate about this project? does she really care about what she's trying to say?

also as the previous post ive rb'ed states, there have been multiple stories as well as scholarship focusing on women in the odyssey and what underwood is doing is not completely original. which again - fine! very little these days is. but if youre gonna put something out into an already saturated market, shouldn't you want to put out your very best, your passion project, something that youre 100% proud and happy with? idk man but if i were her, id be nervous and feeling like i haven't done my best.

anyway, you didn't ask for commentary but you got it regardless. sorry to clog your dashes haha ive said my piece and am happy to just ignore the existence of underwood and her retelling from here on out.

[sleepy-cephalopod-studies]

Review: The Sewing Circle, Axel Madsen

Rating: 0/5, Couldn't even finish it

Every day, millions of readers consume books suffering from "Man Writing About Women" Syndrome. Don't let this happen to you.

Any apprehensions you have about a man writing about lesbians and bisexual women are absolutely justified in this intentionally titillating, gossipy rag. The Sewing Circle is a fascinating subject of study, and if the author were someone competent and capable of organizing and conveying information, would be a great read.

THIS thing is so poorly compiled and edited that I was doing a running tally of every time I saw the word "was" mistyped as "as" and even saw that Greta Garbo's name was mispelled...in the chapter about her own childhood. Greta was great, but she wasn't "Great Garbo." An editor would be greatly appreciated to reel and rein in Madsen's many grammar mistakes, and diatribes that go nowhere, constant name-dropping and then literally dropping the name after a single mention and no explanation to who they are. Not everyone reading your book knows the various Hollywood executives, producers, costume designers, and starlets of the 1920s. Instead of simply dropping a name and giving no anchor or context to who they are outside of the single sentence they're discussed, maybe add some context to who they are and why it matters you're mentioning them at all.

While I understand that many of these women were secretive and closeted about their true sexual orientation, and thus there's a LOT of secondhand evidence and hearsay/rumors involved, that doesn't mean it's a free pass to write like you're part of the Daily Enquirer. If I wanted to consume flimsy gossip about celebrities with dozens of grammatical errors and meaningless conjecture, I don't need to pay $30 for a hardcover--Twitter and internet forums exist for free.

I also want to stress how voyeuristic this author approaches the relationships of these women. If I were being fair, I'd say that Madsen is trying to approach the subject with the allure of the "secret lives" of these celebrities like the magazines and reporters and fans did in this era (and still do today, let's be honest). But if you're going to invade women's privacy and explore their deeply-held-secret sexual identity, I believe an author shouldn't treat it as a raunchy expose. Otherwise it just comes off as just as lacking in empathy and just as creepy as tabloid reporters and men who fantasize about the secret bedroom lives of lesbians and bisexual women in real life. Again, I don't need a nonfiction book to do that for me; I get that unsolicited uncomfortable and misogynist experience for free.

If anyone has recommendations for books about the Sewing Circle that are more factual and empathetic (and ideally, written by a sapphic woman), I'd definitely love to hear them because this is a very interesting subject of history for me and I want to learn more about it without rolling my eyes and spotting basic spelling errors every few minutes.

[ladyofwinterfellxx]

Dating Lisa Rowe Headcanons

Word count: 1k

Request: Yes | No

Film name: Girl, Interrupted

Pairings: Lisa Rowe x Fem!reader

Genre: Fluff, angst, smut mention

Warnings: Psyche ward, Reader is mentally unwell, Mentions of self harm, Smoking, yk- Girl, Interrupted type stuff.

Synopsis: what its like dating Lisa Rowe

Request navigation

Authors note: I’ve gotten really into “Girl, interrupted” lately, and I really like Lisa, so I thought I’d write for her because I relate to her a bit. Hope you like it :) Since Lisa is in the women’s ward the reader is depicted as female. (Just to make it easier Susanna and Lisa never kissed or anything) sorry if this is ooc or anything, i'll get better at writing her as i watch the movie more.

When you first came into the ward, you intrigued her. You weren't kicking and yelling like others usually did. You were quiet, and calm. She watched you carefully as Vallery showed you around the floor, observing your behavior and how you carried yourself.

As you roamed and hung around the ward, she’d come and tease and pester you quite often.

She would take a liking to you quite quickly, but it would take a lot for her to trust you completely, especially if you came after Susanna left.

If you came when Susanna did, She’d bring you along with her and Susan.

You’d probably have to be the one to make romantic advances, to be honest. Yes, she knows she likes you, but getting her to admit her feelings is like talking to a brick wall.

When you did confess, she’d tease you endlessly. but she’d accept your feelings and you’d start dating.

“Aww, you couldn't help falling for little ol’ me huh?”

“Lisa you literally like me too-”

She may act like a tough guy constantly but she softens up when you are alone together.

She’d call you sweetpea or doll face, maybe Hunny or darling once in a while.

She’s definitely the big spoon when you cuddle, but will little spoon once in a while if she’s having a bad day.

Painting each other's nails ofc

Getting her to open up is a tough job, but she’ll cave after a lot of convincing.

She’ll eventually open up about Jennie, and tell you how she misses her.

Comforting her when they give her shocks. Plz hold her after it really effects her.

Trying to keep her out of trouble

getting used to her sneaking up on you constantly, and her teasing you when you jump.

Speaking of teasing, this girl LOVES to tease and pick at you. All in good fun, of course, it's her love language.

she likes PDA depending on her mood, If she’s not having a good day she’s not as touchy, but when she’d in a good mood she’ll likely always have an arm around you or a hand on your thigh. PDA is a whole other story when she's jealous, though.

She’s very possessive, and makes sure everyone knows your hers. that being said, she doesn't exactly get jealous often.

She knows your hers, and Everyone knows not to mess with Lisa, let alone her girl.

When she does get jealous, she’s all over you. Maybe John’s standing a little too close to you or someone has had your attention away from her for a bit too long for her liking, she’ll either

A) Come up behind you, wrap her arms around your waist and start kissing your neck

B) Straight up pick you up bridal style and walk-off

or C) cause a scene to get your attention

Like most things, it depends on what mood she’s in and what the situation is.

(Smutty stuff below)

(ngl if she chooses to walk off with you 9 times /10 she’ll get you alone and roughly finger you to remind you who you belong to-)

^ I mean she almost always ends up doing that anyway but yk-

Speaking of that-

100% the dom in bed, she loves having control over you and your pleasure (or pain-)

3 words. Rough, fast, and messy.

You two don’t get very long to yourselves, so things almost always have to be quick.

But when you two do get alone time, she’ll take her time and really draw out yours and her pleasure.

(End of smutty stuff)

She’d take you with her when Her and Susanna run away.

She’ll do pretty much anything you ask her. Ned to see your file? she’ll get it for you. want a certain nail polish color? its sitting on your nightstand waiting for you. Want a certain book or something? she’ll get Vallery or one of the other nurses to get it for you.

Dates are pretty rare, but she’ll sometimes manage to convince Vallery or someone to let the two of you go off grounds to the ice cream shop or to go on a walk.

her letting you cut her hair for her

almost always sleeping with each other, either you in her room or you in hers.

she’s not very cuddly, but she will when she’d in the mood for it or when you two are sleeping. She like to either spoon you or one of you laying on the other's chest.

almost always getting dragged into her crazy antics

sharing cigarettes together

her being quick to defend you from anything and anyone

If you came before she ran away, your definitely gonna be friends with Jennie.

Knowing everything that's happening on that floor comes with dating Lisa, she knows everything about everybody and often gossips to you when she hears something.

You trying to get Lisa to ease up on Daisy

almost always sharing clothes

If your shorter than her she’ll tease you, calling you munchkin or shortcake.

if your taller than her? she’ll ask things like “how's the weather up there?” or little things like that to annoy you.

^ sometimes you catch her standing on her tiptoes to seem taller,

She’ll throw hands with anyone who tries anything to hurt you. Oh? this person said something about your illness? oops, their nose is broken now. So and so made you uncomfortable? she’ll make their life hell.

She lowkey likes when you play with her hair, brushing it, braiding it, or just twirling it in your fingers. she loves it.

This girl LOVES praise, she may not act like it but complimenting her always makes her melt. plz tell her how pretty she is, how much you love her and how proud of her you are, bb girl deserves it.

Playing cards together surprisingly often

Even though she may not seem like it, she’s a very good listener. If you need to rant, or just wanna ramble about something she’ll listen, giving you her full attention.

She’s good at remembering things, whether its a random childhood memory or something silly, she remembers everything you tell her.

She gets very interested in your hobbies. if your musical, maybe you play guitar or something, she’ll listen and watch you play. she’ll definitely want you to teach her. If your artsy she’ll watch you paint or draw very intently, occasionally doodling with you. If you write she’ll read anything you write, whether its a poem or a story, she’ll read it and tell you what she likes. she’s surprisingly good at constructive criticism, so if you want feedback she’ll give it to you.

^ if you give her any artwork or poems she’ll hang every one up in her room.

If your more on the anxious side, she’ll do the talking for you. Need something from a nurse? she’ll ask for you. Feel uncomfortable getting food from the cafeteria? she’ll get it for you. feel uncomfortable bathing? she’ll come in with you.

overall a protective and pretty good girlfriend

[thosch3i]

The finale of Ultimate Note airs 12/9 (tonight in China) for VIP. Thank you to this drama for bringing me my favorite Iron Triangle ❤ Longer discussion of why I love it so much, and why I strongly recommend it to book fans (especially those upset with certain previous adaptations) below the cut, apologies if it’s not fully coherent at times because I haven’t slept enough and also it’s almost 1am. But your TLDR is basically: characterization, plot, pacing, relationships are the best of any DMBJ drama. Iron Triangle especially.

First, the pacing of this show is excellent. Pretty much all cdramas I’ve seen or heard of have been inundated with filler, and the previous DMBJ dramas fall victim to this as well. Ultimate Note took 36 episodes to cover 4 book arcs, whereas previous adaptations have taken more episodes to cover far fewer. There’s really not any content you’d be wanting to skip, as almost all of it is plot-relevant or character-relevant.

Second, the plot is the most cohesive out of any DMBJ adaptation. Frankly, this isn’t saying too much, given the novel plot can also be confusing as all hell sometimes, but Ultimate Note goes above and beyond in pulling in information from later books and, if I heard correctly, common fan theories, doing their best to fill in the plot holes left by the author to create a more complete story.

Third, the female characters are actually done well. (As well as they can be, given the source material’s unfortunate habit of fridging its women.) For example, A-Ning’s decision to go the Tamutuo wasn’t because she was ~in love~ with some man. She is a determined individual who has made her choice about her path a long time ago, and she is willing to risk death to achieve her goals. Even her death was done about as well as it could have been--it wasn’t drawn out to the point of it being sickeningly cheesy, and Wu Xie tried his best to honor her goals and bring her to the Palace of the Queen Mother of the West (even emphasizing to Pangzi, “if you died, I would carry you too”). In addition, Chen Wenjin wasn’t stuck in some ridiculous love triangle. She loved Wu Sanxing, of course, but her loving a man isn’t made out to be her entire personality. Her goodbye to Xie Lianhuan is poignant but not mushy. She’s steady and sure in her goals, and she knows what she has to do in order to save herself. Yuncai’s character, as well, I think was handled about as well as it could’ve been given the source material. Her relationship with Pangzi wasn’t overexaggerated and nauseating, and I think their relationship was more tolerable in the drama than it was in the novel overall. (In addition, I prefer how they handled her death in the drama versus the novel--instead of just killing her offscreen, they give her a redemption, and show how she’d grown attached to her new friends, Pangzi especially, resulting in her hesitation to deal the final blow.)

Related to the above point: no added forced romances that destroyed the female characters’ personalities and reduced them to just love interests for men, thank god. Pangzi and Yuncai’s relationship was already there in the novel, but nothing about their relationship was distorted in the drama to the point of being annoying, and Yuncai is shown to have her own goals for cozying up to Pangzi (at first, at least). If you want to get technical about “added romances”, you could honestly argue that it’s Pingxie. (And Hei///hua, but I’ll be honest and say they’re not my cup of tea, so I won’t really be discussing them. However, I do think their characters, while also exaggerated for humor at points, were also done well, and their relationship--while AFAIK was not a really a thing in the books at all?--was written in a way that the development made sense, and their personalities compatible.)

But anyway, while Ultimate Note does make Pingxie seem closer to each other than they were in the novel, we do have to remember that the novel is from Wu Xie’s point of view, and he’s a little bit of a blockhead when it comes to noticing how much Xiaoge cares about him. (IIRC, he wonders if Xiaoge even considers him a friend in Zang Hai Hua...after Xiaoge’s literally called him his “only connection” to this world in book 8.) However, from an outsider POV, it’d be natural for us to see Xiaoge worrying more over Wu Xie. Because from Wu Xie’s perspective, what did he actually see? Xiaoge dropping in to save him a few times and often vanishing or turning away right after, leaving Wu Xie with mixed feelings and confusion about his value to Xiaoge. Xiaoge being aloof before they set off to Tamutuo, claiming that he is a person with no past and future, and that no one would remember him if he disappeared. (Xiaoge smiles before telling Wu Xie that he’s on Wu Xie’s side--that’s a smile that the viewers see, but that Wu Xie doesn’t.) Most of Xiaoge’s visible worry for Wu Xie in the desert was also when Wu Xie himself was not there to see it. During the scene where the fungus was growing in Wu Xie’s stomach, he was entirely out of it while Xiaoge visibly panicked about hurting him, and after the fungus was dealt with, Xiaoge only stood off to the side--only to smile faintly to himself, relieved, after Wu Xie wakes up. (Again a smile that the viewers see, but that Wu Xie doesn’t.) But because from an outsider POV we can see all this, while Wu Xie remains partly ignorant, lines like “thankfully, I didn’t bring death upon you” and Xiaoge calling Wu Xie is only connection to the world seem that much more logical, now that we can see some of the depth and development of how much Xiaoge does care about Wu Xie.

That brings me to the primary reason why I love Ultimate Note, because the main selling point for me on any franchise is not actually world-building or plot, but rather the characters and the relationships between those characters. And for DMBJ, the relationship I’m always looking for--and the relationship that the entire franchise ultimately centers around--is the Iron Triangle. And the mutual trust and the strength of the bond between this Iron Triangle is unmistakable; no one is treated as expendable.

As much as we have joked about Xiaoge's double standards with Wu Xie versus Pangzi, the end of the Banai arc especially and the last five episodes have cemented the importance of Xiaoge and Pangzi's friendship. Their relationship is often the weakest leg of the Iron Triangle in DMBJ adaptations, but Ultimate Note has nailed it. Pangzi helps carry Xiaoge out of Tamutuo, and Pangzi's the one who primarily takes care of Xiaoge after he loses his memories. There's also Xiaoge's clear worry over Pangzi after Yuncai's death, and his assurance that Pangzi won't die as long as he is here in the later episodes when the two of them are separated from Wu Xie--showing that the Iron Triangle is a triangle; Wu Xie isn't the single connection that Xiaoge and Pangzi's relationship hinges upon.

Pangzi and Wu Xie's friendship doesn't need much explaining: the two of them bicker like they're brothers, and they could probably star in their own buddy-cop comedy together. Both Pangzi and Xiaoge are shown to be clearly worried for Wu Xie after the Xie Lianhuan reveal, and even though neither of them quite know how to handle it, they are there for Wu Xie. And of course, there's the scene where Pangzi pours out the water while they're waiting for Xiaoge to leave the meteorite. Wu Xie cries for Pangzi when they're in the Miluotuo cave and he chooses to carry out Xiaoge first, and once again, his worry for Pangzi after Yuncai's death is palpable. Even when Wu Xie has to leave Pangzi in Banai, he instructs Xiaoge to look after him (not that Xiaoge really needed the instruction, anyway--that’s his best friend, too).

Wu Xie and Xiaoge's relationship needs even less explaining: anyone who's watched the show can attest to how much they care about each other. From Wu Xie's frantic scrambling to grab the tapes upon hearing they were from "Zhang Qiling" and Xiaoge's introduction in the show being him stopping outside Wushanju to stare up (longingly?) at the sign, we see their relationship unfold in all of its quiet pining and lingering looks. When Xiaoge claims no one would know if he disappeared from this world, Wu Xie doesn't hesitate in promising that he, at least, will. Xiaoge smiles before telling Wu Xie that he's on his side, and Wu Xie vows to walk with Xiaoge until the very end. During the entire Tamutuo trip, Xiaoge is visibly worried for Wu Xie--when the parasitic fungus grew in his stomach, that worry was the most clear. But Wu Xie worries for Xiaoge too: insisting on going to save Xiaoge from the snakes that night when they all went blind; swearing that even if he faces death, he would wait for Xiaoge to leave the meteorite; telling Xiaoge that he will take him home. (Related: the soft, almost vulnerable way Xiaoge tells Wu Xie “take me home” in episode 31.) Not to mention--even when Xiaoge loses his memories, he still remembers Wu Xie. (And Pangzi smiles knowingly right after that scene.)

There are too many character/relationship moments I could write about, but one that stuck out in particular was when they were facing the spiders, and Wu Xie stopped Xiaoge from cutting his hand and using his blood to make the spiders retreat. At this point, Wu Xie and Pangzi don't know the extent of how Xiaoge was (mis)treated as a child (and used as a blood bag, apparently), but they know about how "A-Kun" was captured used as bait. Wu Xie and Pangzi would never ask Xiaoge to bleed for them, no matter what. Not now, let alone 10+ years later. (I won't name names, but if you know what I'm talking about, then you know.)

Which brings me to my main point: the characters in Ultimate Note are the closest to their novel selves I have ever seen in a DMBJ adaptation, and this is objectively the best adaptation of the DMBJ novel. (Whether you prefer another adaption or not is your opinion--I absolutely love the Time Raiders movie, even though that plot is literally all over the place, and Xiaoge is decently OOC--but Ultimate Note is the best adaptation of the novel, and the characters are the most true to what they actually should be.)

You can see the innocent and naïve Wu Xie, but you can also see the developing confusion, frustration, and anger he feels because he's been lead around by his nose his entire life. And he is angry in the novel; he is a bit of a hot-headed bastard; he's not just a naïve child. I remember seeing some complaints that Wu Xie felt "OOC" in the first episode for being so furious with his San-shu, but I think his reactions were spot-on with how he felt, and how he wanted to react. A similar point is the scene where Wu Xie slammed Xiaoge against the car--aside from just being some fun fanservice, in the novel Wu Xie really was furious at Xiaoge for vanishing on him and never contacting him after leaving the Heavenly Palace in the Clouds. A lot of the novel is Wu Xie's inner thoughts, which are difficult to portray in a live action adaptation, but he really did pretty much want to pick a fight with Xiaoge about disappearing, and  Ultimate Note decided on how to express this frustration in a way that suits a drama adaptation. In addition, you can see how Wu Xie’s past experiences like the trip to Tamutuo has changed him in how he manipulates Panma into bringing him to the lake; and you can see how almost losing Xiaoge and Pangzi to the Miluotuo changed him as well, when he thinks he’s lost them for real in episode 36 (leading up to his decision to put on his San-shu’s mask by the end, despite the fact that “some masks, when worn too long, can no longer be taken off”).

As for Pangzi: even though he has scenes that were clearly exaggerated for comic relief, he has plenty of moments that build his character and the Iron Triangle’s bond. These include him pouring out the water while he and Wu Xie are waiting for Xiaoge, his grief over Yuncai’s death, his standing by Wu Xie during the hotel auction scene, and his almost mother-hen-like worry about Xiaoge while they’re entering the Zhang Family Mansion in the last five episodes. Not to mention, he’s really quite a smart and perceptive character, despite his goofiness: he sees through Xiaoge’s worry about Wu Xie, and he knows when to step in and liven the atmosphere (see: Wu Xie being all awkward about his gift to Xiaoge in episode 31, and Pangzi being there practically just for emotional support). Also in episode 31: Pangzi telling Xiaoge that he’s getting more and more humane (the implications about Wu Xie here are pretty obvious). All in all, Pangzi is a funny person; he is often comic relief, but he’s also a steadfastly loyal friend and someone who loves deeply and without regret. Initially we saw more of his humor, but we definitely got the depths to his character by the end of Ultimate Note.

Finally Xiaoge, who I’m discussing last because he’s my favorite character: for once, I can see the humanity behind the title “Zhang Qiling”, and in a way that isn’t OOC. Xiaoge isn’t treated as a free source of bug-repelling blood; he isn’t treated as some overpowered, untouchable idol; he isn’t treated as a rescue machine for whenever another character needs it. He is a human, not a god. For the rest, I think his actor’s words speak for themselves. (And now I really don’t trust anyone else except him with Xiaoge's character.)

Ultimate Note succeeded in capturing the nuances of its main characters: Wu Xie’s loss of his “tianzhen” and slow maturation to the man he will eventually become by Sha Hai; Pangzi’s outwardly humorous pseudo-caricature but inwardly deeply loyal and loving spirit; Xiaoge’s vulnerabilities, painful humanity, and the “heart” given to him by his mother, hidden beneath a seemingly impenetrable armor. This is an Iron Triangle that feels like the Iron Triangle, without needing say so much in words. This is an Iron Triangle with mutual respect and a friendship I can see and believe in.

In conclusion: Ultimate Note does the story justice; it does the characters justice; it does the relationships justice; and it did all this with a low budget and almost no promotion. You can tell the crew definitely cares about the source material.

My only complaint is that they couldn’t film the finale.

Rambling over! All my love to the Ultimate Note cast and crew <3

[redteabaron]

Different anon… Here is the thing though, Drogo/Dany isn’t a parallel to sansan. People who make that comparison either lack severe reading comprehension, which is not surprising for this fandom, or they want to use it to validate sansan. (Tyrion was the older guy Sansa was forced to marry. Dany and Sansa have opposite journeys and their marriages are a part of that.) But sansan’s mirror is Jorah/Dany. Book!Jorah is an older guy who has a creepy obsession with a teenage girl. He dumps his trauma on her, he projects onto her. But he is also her advisor, her confidante early on, his protector. There are also the same BaTB elements sansans love to talk about. She even refers to him as her bear. But he was lusting after her ever since they met and then he assaulted her. He forced himself on her. She is uncomfortable with his actions, but she doesn’t possess the necessary language and she doesn’t understand consent (we know this because of how she frames her relationship with Drogo but also how she expected Lhazareen women to be ok, even be thankful for being married to their rapists, and her dubcon relationship with Irri) so she recontextualize what happened and chastise Jorah for kissing her not because she is a teenager and he shouldn't and she didn’t consent to but because she is his Queen. That's the language she has, so she expresses her discontent, disapproval, rejection with that. Sandor was verbally, psychologically, physically abusive to Sansa but he also occasionally protected her in King’s Landing. He lusted after her, made sexually inappropriate comments to an 11 year old child but he was also the only one in KL to have honest conversations with her. Then he assaulted her, held her at knife point. She was afraid of him kissing her, killing her, she had nightmare about the assault which she clearly registered as a sexual one despite what his fans claim his intentions were. Sansa has a habit of romanticizing/redefining these things. Sansa thinks Arys Oakheart was preferable, that he was kind because he beat her less hard than the other Kingsguard. She remembers Tyrion as someone who were kind to her, someone better than Joffrey even though he molested her and she had him in her nightmares too. She separates Littlefinger and Petyr in her mind because just like with the other men before him the thought of her sometimes-protector at the same time being her abuser is too much for her. Just like Dany she recontextualizes what the Hound did to her and turns the assault into a song to cope with it.

These two pairings has the same dynamic, the difference is fandom’s response to it. (The slight differences are that Dany had actual amiable feelings for Jorah -not romantic love or sexual feelings but friendly, sisterly love for him- and she as a Queen had a lot more agency than Sansa as a prisoner had. She isn't as powerless as Sansa, she could have easily banished him, punished him, even ordered his death.) But no one in fandom writes essay after essay why and how could and should Jorah and Dany end up together. It’s an outrageous suggestion. Dany is a main character, she is the heroine. She is a Queen. Why should she ever end up with someone as lowly as Jorah? Someone as old, as ugly as Jorah? But Sansa, meh she is not an important character. And she needs to be punished, first because she was a child making childish mistakes. Secondly, she is shallow, she refused to be raped by her older, ugly husband. So she needs to end up with an older ugly guy to humble her. Even when the author expressed his distaste of the trope of a noble girl running away with a lowly guy in medieval stories, nah that doesn’t matter here. Sansa being of high nobility, a princess won’t have any factor at all who she’s gonna end up with. They had to keep assuring themselves that she is not a main character so she could even end up with a villainous character, that she is not a Stark so she could end up with people who hurt/fight against her family. The hypocrisy of this fandom, and their selective reading is most clear when it comes to these two “couples”. Almost all sansans (whether it is the actual shippers or those who think it’ll happen because well it’s Sansa what else she’s gonna do besides being a reward bride for some hideous guy) hate Jorah/Dany (as they should) while trying to justify how and why Sansa should end up with the hound. Let's forget the abuse and pedophile, let's assume those never happened, even then it makes no sense. There is not a narratively satisfying way, a logical reason how Sansa could be with Sandor. But they ignore all that because it doesn't fit in with their vision, with their interpretation of the books and characters. Because admitting Sansa is a main character and more than a reward for their pedo fave has a ripple affect, it challenges all their theories, they all crumble. And they just can't let go of their 2 decades old theories, they just have to be right, they must be right. That's why they all took the show's ending as a personal offense, especially the QiTN Sansa. I just can't wait for the books!

Yeah, agreed. jorah and sandor are mirrors of each other. I mean I hope they both die without any glory or honor, personally. I don't really care if they have sacrificial deaths for the greater good - or whatever framing the show had intended - jorah and sandor were also whitewashed and made more pitiable/likeable.

Whenever dany x dr*go is used to validate literally ANY pairing, I am suspish. In particular when we acknowledge that dany absolutely couldn't consent - she was 13 iirc - and was sold off by her abusive brother to a man twice her age, but Sansa reimagining her trauma about Sandor's assault to something less traumatic is considered being hateful to Sandor because he's unattractive. (And I never really listen whenever ppl give me shit or deny it was assault; pertaining to my job, I'm pretty fucking aware what assault or intention-to-assault looks like, and I think most ppl do to, they just seem to lose awareness when it comes to their ships or certain characters).

I think it has to do with Sansa being the archetypal "Pretty Popular Girl" - the one who like feminine things, sort of fussy, likes feminine colors and just in general is feminine. She seems to remind people of the classic mean popular girl we saw popularized in 1990s-2000s high school movies - the one who gets her comeuppance in the end when the non-feminine girl somehow triumphs in whatever way, or she's the one who learns her lesson and stops being quite so feminine, or hooks up with a most-popular guy. The Mean/Pretty Popular girl has to be humbled in some fashion. Fans who don't like her, tend to view this as a way for her to pay for the error of her ways.

Like being a prisoner of war. Or not wanting to fuck tyrion. Or not wanting to run away with sandor.

I mean...all of asoiaf, beyond the politics and magic, is all about trauma and the human response to it - which is varied and depends on circumstances, personalities, and a lot of other things. One of the more vile things GOT did was whitewash jorah and tyrion the way they did imo. Jorah was a predator, circling Dany, regardless of whether she thought of him fondly, he just happened to not be violent towards her - she cries when he forces a kiss on her. Tyrion was a predator who molested her when he acknowledged she was a child "but he wanted her anyway". I've seen a lot of ppl react more sympathetically towards Dany. I haven't seen much recrimination against dany for refusing him the way we see sansa being hated for not wanting tyrion or sandor, hell, even petyr.

But - Sansa, imo, in the larger or at least circles of the fandom that have been around longer, is a more ideal whipping girl for the outlet a lot of ppl crave. See again the popular girl trope. She can't fight, she has no magical creatures, she is not a Chosen One of any kind. She has her wits and her ability to observe and adapt who has no choice but to navigate survival surrounded by people who have more agency and power than she does. That's it. I guess in a world of amazing abilities and magic and warfare, this is very boring, particularly when she doesn't weaponize her femininity or sexuality, where she's beautiful without being dangerous or magical or erotic. And I guess ppl feel that because of that, she needs to be punished for not being as extraordinary as she should be, OR, because she was the "Mean Popular Girl" (she wasn't) she must be humbled, and the ones to do it are the ones she refuses.

It's really delicious knowing they don't get "to have her" 🤢. Hopefully they just both fuck off to the ends of the world or die, idc they deserve zero thought.

[booknerdteen]

★★★★★ 5/5

"Just remember: the choices you make today will be felt by who you have yet to become."

Plot

Clara is a seventeen-year-old who is special. She is an Everwitch. Which means her magic is tied to all four seasons. She is the first Everwitch to appear in almost 200 years so it's a relief when she arrives. But being an Everwitch has its struggles. She has to go through each season while changing and becoming a different person. So she has a personality type for each season. She is forced to evolve and change and move forward but she still remembers her past traumas, with the death of her parents and her best friend Nicki, Clara can't afford to get close to anyone emotionally. So she is moved to a Cabin in the Woods where she can't hurt anyone.

As an Ecological disaster starts to get out of hand, Clara is forced to get out of her comfort zone and use her powers, but she needs training if she's going to be able to save the world.

So she is paired with botanist Sang who is a spring witch and can soothe her worries while training her. But Clara finds herself starting to get attached to Sang, and the last time she had done that - she had killed 3 people.

While still grieving and suffering the loss of her loved ones, Clara can not let this Ecological disaster kill anymore witches so she trains with Sang and develops her magic to the fullest. She starts to let her guard down and trust Sang but getting emotionally attached with him will end bad + she has been planing on stripping herself of magic when the Eclipse arrives. So Clara is left with the ultimate decision. Will she forever live without magic and never have to hurt anyone again while letting other witches die? Or will she take up the duty that has caused her so much pain and loss while risking the people she loves to save the entire world from the ecological situation?

Yeah... theirs a lot going on.

Clara

Surprisingly enough, not annoying. I thought she would be an annoying Character to follow but that honestly wasn't the case. Clara was so realistic. The way she tries to isolate herself so she wouldn't hurt anyone and the way she's so honest with herself. It's beautiful! What's also beautiful is seeing her struggle but still be herself. While changing through the seasons she was still true to herself.

Sang

Sang is a really warm and sweet Character that I adore and can't wait to see more of! (Will we?) I loved how protective he is of Clara! Also, the way he can be both careful and careless at the same time!!!! His love for Plants and Nature really brought out that environmentalist in me to protect what we have because we never realize how much we have until it's gone ;)

Paige

Yessss! This gurl is puuurfect. She's badass, loyal and SO FREAKING hot. I just love her. That's all I'm gonna say.

The Seasons

This book makes me appreciate each and every season even though I'm not a big fan of Summer. ☀️ This book brought out both the good and the bad in all the seasons and that was really nice to see. Also, I loved seeing how they were all connected and had a part to play in keeping the world sane and orderly.

Writing

The writing wasn't my favorite part of the book. In fact, it was the worst BUT the book did make up for that with the plot and great characters so... I'm not complaining.

Confusing things...(bear with me cause these are quite a few)

What is the connection between humans and witches? / What's up with the humans?

So in this world witches rely on humans and humans rely on witches. But what is their CONNECTION. We get that they need each other but do they like each other? And since when do ALL the humans know about witches? Ok...I get that this is a fictional world and the author can do whatever but it at least has to be realistic. I don't understand how everyone could just be ok with the Witches...I don't mean to break the fun but humans are ✨ complicated ✨. There would be some dumb people who are against the witches even though they are literally saving their lives every day.

If Clara's behavior is supposed to be changing every season, isn't it supposed to

be more obvious?

We're in Clara's head but it doesn't feel like she's changing and becoming a different person every season. Other people that know Clara point out that's she's so different from last season's Clara but I don't see any difference.

I was also really confused with the little Epigraph we got at the beginning of each chapter because they were so beautiful and I kept searching "A Season for Everything" on Google and I didn't get where the author got the quotes!! But all those quotes tied up for a precious surprise at the end which is always lovely.

Overall

Overall this book made me CRY. It is a beautiful addition to my nature books and will always hold a place in my heart.

"Women are discouraged from being direct and saying what we think. That's why I love winter: It taught me to stand up for myself when the rest of the world is happy to walk over me."

Thank you Sourcebooksfire and Netgalley for an Advance Readers Copy in exchange for an honest review.

[batfamfucker]

I have never understood the argument that trans people literally just living their lives and transitioning to become who they've always truly been is sexist. "It takes us back 100 years" NO IT FUCKING DOESN'T!!! TRANS PEOPLE MERELY FUCKING EXISTING DOES NOT ENDANGER FEMINISM!!! Stop making it about you. Women who were assigned male at birth are not fucking misogynistic for fucking transitioning and stating so is transphobic. You are not brave, you are not raising awareness of a 'terrible issue', and you are not a true feminist if you agree with JKR on any of this. JKR is not a hero, she is not some God send who's 'finally standing up for women during this misogyny', she is a transpbobe who is being protected by bigots, wealth, and childhood nostalgia because some people don't want to believe that the books they grew up reading were written by someone with a moral compass made of such cheap fucking plastic it could break with even the slightest of insecurity.

The term "People who menstrate" is not sexist, it is not taking anything away from cis women, it's just inclusive to trans men and non-binary people. Stop saying shit like 'if you menstrate you're a WOMAN' or 'only women menstrate' because, not only is that trans erasure, but it proves that you do not believe trans men to be real men, or trans women to be real women, or even some fucking cis women to be real women because guess fucking what!!! Some cis women don't menstrate!!! For a variety of reasons!!! That doesn't fucking mean they ain't women though does it???

Stop hiding behind fake feminism to support your transphobia the way that fake 'Christians' hide behind religion to support racism, homophobia, etc. That trick is getting old.

Feminism was created to allow women to be equal to men, but, like every movement, it had evolved and adapted to become more inclusive due to the needs within society through different time periods. Modern feminism is not just about women being equal, it's about everyone being equal and no one being discriminated against due to gender inequality, that includes women, non binary folk, and men. And before some of you @ me by saying men are not oppressed, I understand they have significant privilege, but can you look me in the eye and tell me that men don't also have unrealistic standards placed on them, that toxic masculinity is not a thing, and that society does not expect things from men that are unfair and unjust just because they are men? Hell, me even having to make a post about this issue proves my point because ya'll won't even keep your mind open for two fucking seconds to realise that trans men are real men, and having gender neutral terms for menstruation is vital to ensure that they feel safe and accepted within our society, it is not women erasure to support trans people, but claiming it is is fake feminism.

And if you're so opposed to fighting for men too, as this suggests you may be, then go ahead and fight for just women. But if you're going to do that, fight for ALL women. INCLUDING trans women. Not just white, cis, straight women. If you clearly care about all women, as you claim to from the glass pedestal you've put yourself on, show it by actually fucking supporting ALL women. That means trans women, that means queer women, that means women of colour, and women who have other religions beliefs than your own. I better see you supporting black lives matter and black women, I better see you standing up against the dangerous stereotypes that Muslim women face, I better see you fighting against homophobic dealth penalties in countries where being gay is still illegal and punishable by death for queer women, ect. Fight for these women the way they have fought for you, for the way trans women have fought for you, even as you still fight against them. We're on the same side so why the fuck are you fighting them? You've got the wrong target.

If you want equality, then fucking prove it by fighting for equality for all women, not just equality for you. Because let's be honest, you don't actually care about people's rights unless they're your own, that's what this is really about.

So to JKR, and anyone who 'stands with JKR', with all due respect, of which you are due none, fuck off. Just fuck off. Take your 'subtle' transphobia and your fake ass 'feminism' and keep it away from me. Stop making this about you, I know some of you are bored during quarantine but you can't seriously be desperate enough to start the pettiest beef for even an ounce of the putiful attention you crave. Grow the fuck up, mind your own business, and stop dragging trans people when you have literally nothing to do with their lives, because, shockingly, their lives do not revolve around you. Find something actually meaningful to do with your life, travel the world, follow your dream career, maybe even write a book. Or, maybe, don't, because if you're supprting JKR, I can only imagine how it'd turn out. Don't want to let another generation of kids down when they realise the author's a terf now, do we?

[thefloatingpoem]

I don't want to be disrespectful, but I don't understand your issue with sherlock and "queerbaiting." I'm all for representation in media, however, realistically not everyone is gay. John has said multiple times in the show that he isn't gay, and he was married to a woman. Two men are allowed to be close friends without having to satisfy a tumblr-worthy homoerotic fantasy. As I said, I fully support representation, but just because two characters aren't gay for each other doesn't make a show bad

There are many things I’d like to unpack in your ask, nonny.

It’s difficult to know where to begin. I’ll start by saying I’m glad you agree that queer representation is important. So let’s start there, with the textual representation of queer people in Sherlock.

The characters who are textually queer in Sherlock include: 

-Moriarty (confirmed most recently in TFP when he jokes about his bodyguard having ‘more stamina, but is less caring in the afterglow’), -Irene Adler (established as gay during the Battersea scene with John, in which to his assertion that he’s not gay, she replies, “well I am. Look at us both.” More on John later. She also nonconsensually drugs and whips Sherlock, which I think is extremely out of character for a professional in the kink community) -Culverton Smith (who has an honest to god hard on when he’s suffocating Sherlock and breathes his fear of death in and says in the most rapturous voice, “lovely”), -Eurus, (who suggests that the victim of her brutal rape could have been a man or a woman and she wouldn’t have noticed)-and to some extent Magnussen (who creepily kisses Sherlock’s hands, among other weird bodily power things he does, like flicking John’s face).

Perhaps you’ve noticed that this is a list of villains, all of whom are queer coded, and most of whom to some extent have the hots for Sherlock and violate Sherlock’s bodily autonomy when he is otherwise incapacitated (other than Eurus, because equating queerness with incest would be a little much even for this show).

So for our queer representation on this show we get 6, count em, 6 queer monsters, 6 queer psychopaths.

Forgive me if I’m less than thrilled about this.

BUT I was willing to overlook this, I was willing to forgive this, because to my view, the plot was inching forward towards a realistic portrayal of queer love—a nuanced and hard won happy ending, a love narrative that would speak to the complexities of human nature and queer identity.

Let’s turn to that question for a while. Queerness does not exist in a vacuum. It exists within a highly oppressive heteronormative framework. And so when you tell me, John has said many times that he isn’t gay, I say unto you: so did I.

My only way of surviving a homophobic environment was to swallow whole the lie that I was straight, to try as hard as I could to believe I was straight. This is compulsory heterosexuality. The result of this doublethink was that I had no interest in romance or sex. But I publically feigned interest in men for many years. I worked hard to convince myself that I was straight and normative. I was trapped deep in a subconscious closet. We often talk about the closet being something that we know we’re in and we want to be out of it. But I tell you, I honest to god thought I was straight. I thought I would marry a man and have children and live in the suburbs. As it turns out, none of those things have happened, thank god. But I spent many years of my life telling people I wasn’t gay.

By the way re: John and his marriage to a woman, being married to someone of the opposite sex has virtually nothing to do with whether you’re gay or not in a world where visible gayness is met with violence, death threats (my gf has literally been chased with a knife), rape threats (this has happened at least three times that I can think of off the top of my head), judgment, discrimination, and hate. Also, many people, like a younger version of myself once did, believe that they are straight and do their best to act accordingly, including marrying someone and finding out later that they were wrong in doing so. All this being said, John could easily be bi or otherwise queer. Suggesting that his marriage to Mary should preclude any and all attraction to men or taking that as proof of straightness is frankly biphobic and erases the bi experience.

But let’s move away from the personal significancer of a John Watson coming out/discovering himself narrative, and towards addressing your other comments.

Regarding your comment, “Two men are allowed to be close friends without having to satisfy a tumblr-worthy homoerotic fantasy”: From my perspective, summing up what the Johnlock fandom does as “tumblr-worthy homoerotic fantasy” is infantilizing and doesn’t give full credit to the depth of thought and nuance that goes into these transformative works.

I can name on one hand the pieces of mainstream media that tell a story like mine. Blue is the warmest colour is one, Carol is another.

The work these fanfiction authors are doing for representation by taking mainstream stories and queeriung them is monumental. But it is still not mainstream media representation. And we deserve that.

And now we come to the queerbaiting portion of my response.

Tropes are what tell us what kinds of archetypal stories are being invoked in the telling of a new story. In TV, there are many different kinds of tropes: plot tropes, lighting tropes, musical tropes, dialogue tropes, camera angle tropes, etc. For example a long lingering gaze in television codes romance for us. It’s a romantic trope. 

For more on tropes, here are some useful resources: http://thorinlock.tumblr.com/post/132779606878/romantic-shots-in-bbc-sherlock

http://ifyouhaveenoughnerve.tumblr.com/post/76422437022/the-unabridged-dictionary-of-johnlock-tropes-157

http://tvtropes.org/

As a culture, we tell a lot of straight white love stories that end happily. Most of our romantic tv tropes come from these stories.

As a culture, we don’t tell many gay stories, and usually when we do, they are tragic and someone dies (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/BuryYourGays). A common trope in stories about lesbians that I hate is that one woman leaves the other for a man—and that’s supposed to be a happy ending.

The point is, the filming and story telling tropes of romance are all over this show and these characters. Close shots of them gazing into each other’s eyes, the soft looks they give each other when they think the other won’t notice, the soft lighting accompanying these scenes, the dialogue, especially in the scene in ASiP at Angelo’s. As an exercise, try imagining that scene if Sherlock were a gorgeous woman.

JOHN: So you’ve got a boyfriend then?


SHERLOCK: No.


JOHN: Right. Okay. You’re unattached. Like me.  Fine.  Good.(modified from this transcript )

And then John licks his lips.

This is where it becomes queerbaiting. When the BBC tweets “Sherlock’s in love, but with who?” in order to promote s4, in which Sherlock’s romantic life is not shown to be developing at all, that is queer baiting. And it’s cruel.

More on queerbaiting:

https://www.autostraddle.com/how-do-we-solve-a-problem-like-queerbaiting-on-tvs-not-so-subtle-gay-subtext-182718/

http://www.afterellen.com/tv/471593-lets-end-queerbaiting-2016

Basically, the idea of gayness between Sherlock and John is a running joke on the show, a joke which has no pay off. Perhaps your sexuality has never been thrown in your face, or laughed at. Perhaps you have never been threatened violence or stalked or whistled at. But I have experienced all of this, just for holding my girlfriend’s hand in public.

So in sum, we have a show using romantic film tropes in order to make a joke about my sexuality, a joke at the expense of the marginalized.

Of course I’m upset and angry.

If this is a show about an epic platonic male friendship, that’s fine.

(Epic platonic male friendship is the oldest, most done narrative in existence, by the way. This is an excellent if somewhat dry book about the cultural shift in the twelfth century from tales of epic brotherly love/devotion between knights to tales of chaste courtly love between men and aloof women).

But in that case, stop it with the romantic TV tropes, stop teasing queer fans on twitter, stop making homophobic “no homo” jokes for the straight audience to have a laugh at my expense, and for god’s sake, stop writing all of your villains as queer coded psychopathic monsters. Was that really necessary??? It’s homophobic and it’s bad, lazy writing, and we deserve better representation than that. We deserve more than psychotic gay villains and desperately unspoken hidden subtext and winks and nudges on twitter from the creators. We deserve real representation, no hinting, no winking, no implying. Real, textual queer representation.

My last comment to you, nonny, is this: Indeed, not everyone is gay. And neither is everyone straight. I’m tired of never seeing myself or any part of my identity reflected in mainstream media.

For more information about media’s skewed representation of the world, see this GLAAD report.