#Like bro I'm not going to tell you about my personal issues with this manager

[keepingthepeaceinouterspace]

Officially (but unofficially because my boss wasn't supposed to tell me yet) I'm getting moved to the boss I don't like!!! My current boss likes her and I had to be like "yeah so my concern here is that I have repeatedly see her through her teammates under the bus and undermine her direct reports and she's a terrible listener so."

But my manager did flag what I had said about my lack of interest in this role so now the VP is going to have a one on one to discuss the change with me 😅🙈🤣

[linkuei-scum-without-s]

First time posting a headcanon so I'm kinda nervous but I'm give it a shot ( BTW ENGLISH IS NOT MY FIRST LANGUAGE )

So I got a random headcanon about the lin kuei bros ! But Cats AU :D

Okay okay imagine living in a house with a three Cats you just found them homeless on the street and feel sorry for them so you took them in ... Orange cat, Gray cat and a black cat in your house

And if you're going to ask me how did all turn into a cats... Then the answer is Shang Tsung... Don't ask how ... It's just Shang Tsung that mf turned them into a cats ... Maybe just to laugh at them....

Anyways living with the Lin Kuei cats it's the best thing!! If you manage to gain their trust ..... Only with Tomas and Kuai tho.. You don't wanna get near Bi-han... Trust me... This bitch would give you a new scrach everyday... He's the kind of the bratty cat

Hiss 24/7 when every you get closer to him

Sometimes attack you and you'll have either Tomas or Kuai trying to stop him... Or both of them by pulling him from his tail....

Man he's a cat with trust issues so it's gonna take a while until you gain his trust

But to be honest... I believe Tomas would be the first one would Trust you... After seeing you how you're so caring to all of them... Even his brat older brother

He will be the type to be a clingy cat that's how I imagine him

When ever you sit down expect him in less then a second to be on your lap.... (HE'S SO ADORABLE KWHWKWJEJ)

Also whenever Bi-han give you a new scratch Tomas would be the one treating it... By licking it.... He's trying to apologizing instead of his bro

Like "I Apologize for my brother action.... He's just like this all the time... Here let me treat your wounds! " but in cats language...

Tomas is loves cuddles as well whenever you go to bed he'll climb up next to you and sleep

He's so wholesome

As for Kuai Liang... He's a calm cat... When you first let them in... He won't do anything just watching you around...

He's believe in 'Action speaks Louder then words' so he'll only trust you by you're action... And since you are so caring about them... And can take his Older brother's behavior he can tell you're a nice person so he will trust you a little... Still calm tho

Likes to sit besides you if you were watching TV or reading a book whatever you're doing he'll sit next to you... Either sleep or watching what are you doing

Btw when you go to bed he will be sleeping next to your head... He loves your hair... He think it's soft so sometimes when you woke up you'll find him sleeping on it like a pillow .... If you have a short hair he will be leaning on your head

He will try to convince his brother that you're harmless and never meant to hurt them but it's not working... Bi-han thinks if he give you a little cance you might going to stop him on his back or betrayed him...

Man the last time you were trying to wash them all.... It went well with Kuai and Tomas they both let you wash them peaceful.. Somehow Tomas was playful in the water and it got you confused actually for both of them... Them were so calm for cats begin in the water.... You didn't think about you just that's they might have got used to water somehow... Or they are a special cat who would give no pain in the ass to their owner when they are washing them

Anyways after finish the and dry them off you turn you're head to the last target .. Bi-Han ... man if you Know anime JJBA you will know what I mean when I say the fight you just had with bi-Han is the same fight between Jotaro and Dio trust Man and all of this happens while trying to get him into the bath top... You got.. A lot of scratches A few were on your face as well not only a just scars you have got but you had too chase him around the whole house whenever you get closer to him will attack you and hiss so good luck with washing him...

But if you manage to gain his trust (and it's a hard challenge trust me) he will be less aggressive ... Might even let you pet him (he will try so hard not to purr) doesn't attack you anymore... But he will always be cold with you...it's just his way of showing he trust you btw at rare times you'll find him sleeping next to you on the bed.... All the time he prefers to sleep alone

This is so random I just wanted to make some headcanons but always so nervous to post it but right now I decided to give it a shot.... Plz don't hate me of you don't like it ;-;

[jaegersdevil]

three plans - eren jaeger

College!Eren x Fem!Reader

summary: eren needs help asking you out!!

cw: use of y/n, very rushed ending, mikasa & jean are dating (briefly mentioned), eren and jean actually get along, the dorms are massive at my fake college (i'm talking like 2-bedroom apartment-sized, ok).

w/c: 3.4k

Eren was about to leave. He sat on the couch in Jean Kirstein’s dorm and waited for him to return from his management class, cursing himself repeatedly for asking Jean, of all people, to help him with his issue. 

To be fair, you weren’t the worst issue Eren could have, but his situation, or lack of situation, with you was… an issue. Eren would consider himself a confident guy until it came to you. He had barely spoken to you, becoming speechless whenever you were nearby.

Despite having class together, he was sure he wouldn’t know what to tell you if he bumped into you on the street. So, yeah, it was a sizeable issue, considering he was harbouring the world’s biggest crush on you. 

Toying with the hem of his sweat shorts and chewing on his bottom lip, Eren sat in silence. He was well aware of Jean's invitation to play NBA 23 on the PS5, but he was too nervous to even think about taking up the offer. He’d rather sit, wallowing in his anxiety, than play a video game. So, yeah, maybe this issue was larger than he thought. 

“Ok, what do you want?” Jean’s voice and the slamming of the dorm door simultaneously cut through the quiet, making Eren jump in his spot. 

Upon realising what he was about to tell Jean, Eren turned red. He opened his mouth to say ‘never mind’, 'forget it’, or even your name, but nothing came out. 

“Woah, bro, you good?” Jean threw his backpack onto his desk chair and tilted his head. Eren nodded and then shook his head before nodding again. Jean scoffed out a laugh and held his hands out. “Okay, let’s start with making sure that you’re breathing. You’re breathing, right?” 

Eren put his hand on his chest, feeling the rapid rise and fall of his chest before letting out a ‘yes’. 

Jean’s eyebrows furrowed; he’d never seen Eren like this before. “Eren, calm down. Wait, you’re not dying, are you?” Jean’s sudden panic caused the brunette to shoot up from the couch. 

“No! No, Jean, I’m not. But I’m the most embarrassed I’ve ever been right now, so can you just stop asking me questions, please, and I’ll tell you what’s up.” 

The smirk on Jean’s face dropped when he realised how much this was affecting Eren. Jean didn’t speak as he nodded and sat on the couch Eren previously sat on, urging him to continue. 

Eren glared at him. “If I hear one word out of your mouth—” 

“Yeah, I got it.”

Eren sighed as he ran his hands over his face. “I like this girl, and—” 

Jean’s eyes widened. “No way! You’re like this over a girl?” He exclaimed. 

Eren clenched his jaw and tilted his head when the 6’2” boy jumped up and began shaking his shoulders. “Bro!” 

Jean’s hysterical laughter could be heard down the hallway, piquing the interest of Sasha and Connie, who smiled knowingly before they left their dorm. 

“Forget I ever told you, Kirstein,” Eren said lowly, shoving Jean’s hands off his shoulders. But before he could leave, the dorm door swung open. 

“Jaeger, what’s going on?” Sasha’s voice was twinged with mischief, Connie following close behind. Eren wished the floor would swallow him whole. 

But before he could make his great escape, Jean sported a cheeky grin and hooked his arm around the shorter boy’s neck, pulling him into a loose headlock. “Eren likes a girl, and he’s sooo shy about it.” 

“Y/n?” Connie said. Everyone paused their movements, Eren trying to escape Jean’s death grip and Sasha moving forward to tickle him. 

“How—?” Eren started before Connie cut him off. 

“Don’t think we don’t notice how you practically stare at her in Finance and search for her at the courts. You’re the most un-subtle person ever, Eren.” 

Connie knew he had hit the nail on the head when Eren turned a deep shade of pink, making his friends whoop in laughter. 

“Eren’s whipped!” They teased, ruffling his hair and poking him in the ribs as he attempted to leave. 

“No, don’t leave! We’ll help you!” Sasha called after Eren when he walked out the door. 

Eren stopped in the middle of the hallway. Was he really about to take girl advice from a bunch of idiots? Did he have another choice? He knew he'd get teased relentlessly if he told Armin and Mikasa. But he'd already told these three, and they were the biggest loudmouths in the universe.

Groaning, Eren spun on his heel and trudged back into Jean’s dorm. 

“Fine.” 

 —

The night before, after telling the boys and Sasha about his issue, Eren was given a plan and told to follow it. 

It was the first class of the day, and Eren held his usual black coffee in one hand and a note in his other. He rolled his eyes and shoved the scrap piece of paper Jean, Sasha, and Connie had written on in his pocket before running a hand through his hair. There’s no way he was going through with this. 

“Ready for the plan?” Connie asked, a giggle slipping through as he shook Eren’s arm. 

Eren forgot he had Finance with him. “Yeah, bro. Totally.” 

Connie smirked, adjusting his backpack strap on his shoulder. “Get ready. Phase one is in motion.” 

Eren was about to ask him what he meant but was instead rendered speechless when he spotted you disappearing through the doors to the lecture hall. 

“Come on,” Connie pulled Eren along, nearly tripping them both. Meanwhile, Eren was running through what to say to you. His palms were sweaty, his breathing was shallow, and he licked his lips nervously.  

He saw you giggling with one of your friends, someone he had yet to know the name of, but he could barely take his gaze off you. So effortlessly gorgeous with kind eyes. Shy and reserved, but he’d seen you at parties and knew that you were the opposite when you were with the right people and in the right place. He hoped he’d eventually be someone you could be yourself around. 

“Go,” Connie’s voice brought him back to reality, and before he knew it, he was shoving Eren in your direction. 

“Con—” 

“Hey, Eren.” Your voice. 

Eren stood straight as a board, frantically looking at Connie behind him. Fuck, fuck, fuck. 

He then focused his attention on the wall behind you, trying to remember the notes on the paper and the plan he was told to follow. The plan!

“Oh! Uh—hey, Y/n. What’s up?” He internally cringed at his attempt to talk to you.

“Not much, just freaking out over the quiz today,” You laughed, playing with your pen. 

Eren’s eyes widened. 

“There’s a quiz today,” He said it more to himself as a realisation than a question, but you nodded. 

“Yep, on topics 3-6.” 

Eren sucked in his cheeks. How could he forget? 

“Eren, you okay?” You asked him. He exhaled and nodded, throwing his thumb over his shoulder. 

“I should probably sit.” 

You held back a laugh and nodded again, not knowing what more to say. Eren would have slapped himself had he not been in a lecture hall with 300 others. 

“Bye, Y/n,” He rushed, turning around and making a beeline to where Connie sat a few rows down. 

He wore a devilish smirk when Eren plopped into the seat beside him. “So, loverboy? How did it go?” 

Eren shook his head, flustered. “Nothing happened. We’re moving on.” 

Connie’s jaw hung open. “No, the plan says—” 

“Fuck the fucking plan, Springer. It’s not happening. I can’t do it.” 

Connie felt a pang of sympathy for his friend. “Eren—” 

“Nope, I’m spending the rest of my life alone.” 

Eren didn’t dare turn around to look back at you in fear you’d have realised his intentions and laugh at him for his attempt to flirt with you. 

Connie opened his mouth to joke about something to quarrel Eren’s anxieties, but the lecturer spoke loudly over the microphone and announced that there was, in fact, a quiz. 

Plan #1 = A Fail

“I just don’t understand why we can’t tell the rest of the group. I feel like this is a friend group issue,” Connie complained. 

“This is not a friend group issue, Constance, this is a me issue, and I have come to you to help me. If I wanted their help, I would’ve asked them,” Eren said firmly. 

Connie threw his hands up in defence and nodded, mouthing a ‘sorry.’

Jean shook his head. “I agree with Connie."

"Me too!" Sasha cut in.

"We should tell them.”

“No! I’m not telling them, and soon, I won’t be telling you about this anymore," Eren mumbled.

“But, Eren, you know we love helping you! I’m sure they would love it too,” Sasha urged, sighing when the brunette shook his head. 

“Not happening.” 

The two boys and Sasha groaned and began arguing their points. 

“At least tell Armin and Mikasa. I think they deserve to know what’s going on,” Sasha hinted, smiling widely when Eren glared at her. 

—

“You what?” Mikasa’s yell made Eren step forward and cover his best friend’s mouth. 

“Shut the fuck up,” Eren whispered. "You can’t tell anyone.“

He took his hand off Mikasa’s face and rubbed his eye with his knuckle. 

“You can’t talk to a girl because you’re scared?” Mikasa provoked, covering her mouth with her hand to muffle her childish laughter. “This hasn’t happened before.” 

“Thanks, dipshit, I know,” Eren rolled his eyes before pacing the room. 

Eren was usually the shit-stirrer of the friend group, but his friends could tell when he was in distress, and clearly, not being able to speak to you was turning out to be a bigger deal than they initially thought. 

“You really like her?” Armin asked.

Eren was shocked when he didn’t hear an ounce of humour in his best friend’s voice. “Yeah.” 

“Okay, let’s devise a plan, then.” 

Eren shook his head. “No, no more planning. I’ve already tried Sasha’s plan.” 

“Wait, Sasha knows?” Armin’s eyes widened. 

Eren laughed and nodded. “And Jean and Connie.” 

“Wow, so much for being our best friend, Eren,” Mikasa joked, ruffling his hair. 

“Get off me, and fine. If you want to make a plan, talk to them and I’ll see if your plan is good enough to use.” 

—

“This is a shit plan.” 

Armin gawked. “You haven’t even read through all of it yet.” 

Eren shook his head. “I don’t need to read all of it to know it’s shit.” 

Armin rolled his eyes and scrunched up the piece of paper in his hand. He grumbled something as he did so and found the trash can in Jean’s room to throw it in. 

“Ok, fine. Think about it this way,” Jean said, ripping another page from the notebook. “You’re Eren fucking Jaeger, okay? You’re hot and you’re great with girls, and if Y/n is the one you really want and she’s as great as you say she is, then there’s no doubt in my mind that she’ll like you too. But bro, gonna be honest, this is sad to watch.”

“Shut the hell up,” Eren mumbled, a smile gracing his cheeks. But nonetheless, he cocked his head in contemplation and with a surge of confidence, he was off. Jean’s words were next to hopeless, but he was right about one thing. 

Eren really wanted you. 

You sat in the coffee shop on the edge of campus like you did every Thursday afternoon, except this time, you’d be getting a visit from Eren. 

You hadn’t expected him to stumble towards you in class last Monday morning, but you were glad he did. You’d been wanting to talk to him since the first time you saw him and you counted your lucky stars that he initiated the first conversation before you had to. Although calling it a conversation would be an overstatement, it was a few words at best. Nonetheless, since last Monday, you’d been looking for him more than you usually did. 

But, sitting in the coffee shop like you did most weeks, you didn’t expect him to put up a chair beside you. In fact, you would’ve never anticipated the hard set of his jaw with the contrast of his nervous eyes, but you weren’t complaining. 

“Hey, Y/n,” Eren greeted, his hands laced together on the table. The corner of your lip drew upwards at the sudden company.

“Hi, Ren,” You replied sweetly. You didn’t miss the way his cheeks tinted pink at the way you used his nickname. It was cute when you said it. 

“Uh—I was just wondering if you..” He trailed off, and you tilted your head, urging him to continue. “If you, uh, had the notes for class last week? After the quiz?” He said in a rush. Your shoulders visibly slumped at the mention of class but nodded, alas. 

“Yeah, I can email them over to you, or text, whichever is easier,” You smiled; however, Eren noticed it didn’t reach your eyes like it normally did. 

“You can text them to me, that would be best. Here, let me give you my number,” Eren grinned, and you felt a spark in your chest. He had the prettiest smile. 

You passed him your unlocked phone and watched as he typed in his phone number. 

“There you go,” He slides your phone across the table. “Thank you.” 

You locked your phone without checking the screen beforehand and nodded. “It’s no problem, Eren. I’ll have them to you by tonight.” 

Eren beamed and pulled his bottom lip between his teeth to stop smiling. “See you next week at the game?” 

You drew in a sharp breath. “Yes! I’ll be there. It starts at 7, right?” 

He nodded and stood from the chair. “On the dot. See you there.” 

You stared out the window with warm cheeks as he left. Scrambling to pick up your phone, you open it to see Eren’s contact. 

Ren :)

Your heartbeat increased when you saw the photo of his face on the contact. He must’ve taken it while you were clicking around on your laptop to locate the class notes. 

Oh yeah, this was going to be an issue.

Plan #2 = A Success

You texted Eren later that night with the notes from class attached. He swore he stopped breathing when he saw the unknown number on his phone screen. 

“What’s up, Eren?” Reiner asked when he saw his friend in a state of shock. 

Eren whipped his head towards him. “Oh, sorry, nothing.” 

Porco squinted at Eren from behind his glasses, a small smirk growing on his lips. 

“You need new glasses or something, Galliard?” Eren snapped. The boys around him started whooping and shaking his shoulders when they heard his attitude. “Get off me.” 

“Love troubles, Eren?” Pieck joked, complaining when Sasha pinched her bicep, but then her eyebrows flew up when she realised she was right. “Who is she?” 

Jean, Connie, and Armin sat silently on the couch, Sasha, Pieck, and Mikasa on Jean’s bed while the boys prodded Eren for answers. He was becoming more snappy than before, so they knew they’d hit a soft spot. 

However, Ymir noticed that the three most talkative weren’t talking. “You know,” She threw an accusatory finger at the boys on the couch and then at Sasha. The room went silent as everyone watched the interaction. 

“We know nothing,” Connie said, shrugging his shoulders. 

But, then he winked. Fucking Connie.

The room went loud with shouting and laughter, and Eren knew he’d have to tell them eventually. 

“Fine! Calm the fuck down and listen because I’m only telling you once.” 

Ymir laid back on the giant beanbag with a shit-eating grin alongside Historia. 

Eren stood in front of them all, wringing his fingers. 

“Today, Jaeger,” Ymir rolled her eyes when Eren took a second too long, earning her and the others that snickered a glare. 

“Okay, her name is Y/n, and she’s in my finance class, okay? I’ve tried talking to her too many fucking times, and I’m hopeless. So there, are you happy now?” 

Uproar. 

Eren had boys shaking his shoulders with words of encouragement while the girls laughed and teased him for his crush. 

“You should give her your jersey for next week’s game!” Armin suggested. 

The room fell quiet. 

“Arlert, you are a genius!” Connie yelled, and Mikasa and Sasha ran out of the room to get Eren’s spare jersey from his dorm. 

But, Eren was stuck in a whirlwind of things to say, things not to say, ways of giving you the jersey, how to text you, how not to. Even though it was an overload of information, he was sure he had a sound method of getting the jersey to you. 

—

Over the course of the next week, Eren and you had been texting non-stop. A random text from you on Friday night about which diner in town was the best for ice cream sundaes had sparked a debate over what flavour ice cream sundae was the best. He then messaged you a photo of a dog he saw on his morning run on Sunday.

Despite not seeing each other until Friday due to busy schedules, Eren felt he had known you forever, as cheesy as it was. You agreed and disagreed on the same things except for the ice cream sundae dilemma.

—

“Don’t fuck this up or all of our hard work would’ve been for nothing,” Jean mumbled in Eren’s ear 3 hours before the game. Both of them were already in their game day suits, Eren with his black coffee and Jean with his new pair of Jordans.  

“Gee, thanks for the words of encouragement, horsey.”

Eren had texted you half an hour before to meet him at the coffee shop, hoping you could make it. You responded immediately, accepting. Oh, how his skin tingled and the nauseous feeling in his stomach settled at the sight of the little ‘x’ at the end of the message. 

This plan may be the best one yet. 

Jean left Eren alone at the coffee shop to make his way down to the basketball court, saluting him as he walked off. Eren shook his head and rolled his lips between his teeth. It was now or never. 

“Eren!” You called from across the grass, waving at him. He swore the smile on his face couldn’t get any bigger, but when it came to you, he didn’t know what was possible. 

“Hey, how are you?” He asked, a grin playing on his lips. You laughed until you stopped in front of him. 

“I’m great now. Are you excited for the game?” You questioned, lacing your fingers in front of your body. 

Eren nodded before he realised why he asked you to meet. “I, uh, actually wanted to ask if you wanted to wear my jersey tonight, to the game? It’s totally fine if you don’t want to, but I just thought I’d ask anyway–”

“Of course, I’d love to,” You said shyly. Eren sighed in relief as he passed you the black material. 

You giggled as you unravelled the jersey, admiring the ‘Jaeger/4’ on the back. Your heart leapt in your chest and your stomach was full of butterflies. You let out a little noise of happiness and peered at Eren. 

He watched you with such adoration, it shocked you at first, but then the feeling of his eyes looking at you so intensely was something you wanted for the rest of your life. 

“I—”

“God, you don’t know what you do to me,” Eren blurted. He’d never felt so vulnerable and embarrassed, but those lovely eyes of yours assured him that whatever he was feeling was okay. “Sorry.” 

Your eyebrows flew to your hairline. You weren’t expecting that. 

“Don’t be sorry, Eren,” You said softly, your voice void of any indication you were making fun of him. “The feeling’s mutual. I was actually going to tell you that I can’t stop thinking about you before you interrupted me.”

“Really?” He laughed in disbelief—he never thought he’d meet someone like you who’d want him back. His friends were right.

You nodded, playing with the collar of the Jaeger jersey in your arms. You smiled and felt your cheeks get warm. “Now, go. I don’t want to get in trouble for keeping you from warm-ups, you’ve got a game to win.” 

Eren brought his fist up to his ear before he pointed at you and stepped backwards. “I’ll look for you in the stands, okay?” 

You giggled and nodded. “Score a point for me, Ren?"

“I’ll score multiple for you. And maybe I’ll buy you an ice cream sundae after the game.”

You gasped, and your smile grew impossibly larger, your cheeks hurting from grinning and the cold.

“Chocolate and banana?” You call after him.

“You bet! I’ll even get you extra M&Ms.”

And once he was a fair distance away, you spun around, screwed your eyes shut, and laughed excitedly.  

Plan #3 = The Winner

[cosmicstarlatte]

Customer Service (Obey Me!)

━━━━━━━━━━ ✦ ━━━━━━━━━━

They try contacting customer service. 🤷‍♂️

»Characters: Demon Bros

»Tags: Certified Shitpost™️, Pathetic Lucifer is my favorite Lucifer

»Notes: It's been a while since I've done a shitpost bulleted fic so ♡reblogs♡ are appreciated. I've had this wip since March apparently? 💀

Lucifer:

A hand on his hip and the phone in the other

This man means business

"Don't talk to me, I'm trying to keep my level of anger"

Held onto his anger for two hours waiting for the next agent

The annoying hold music only fueled him

Tried to be reasonable with the agent when he got patched through

But they were new

"Look, just get me your manager."

Waited another half hour for them

The problem got fixed rather quickly actually

smirked in satisfaction...Lucifer always wins.

If only he noticed the two stuck pages in the manual, he would've not wasted his morning

Mammon:

If he wasn't broke he would've paid someone else to make the call

Waited for an hour but it felt like eternity

"Yeah ain't there a satisfaction guarantee on this anyway!? The customers always right!"

Tried to get a replacement for his earbuds

And a refund while he was at it

Scammy? What?? Nooo....

"They fell in the wash! It's not my fault! Did I get insurance? Who has the money for that?"

Him and the agent went back and forth for a while

The agent finally caved and promised to replace the earbuds

"Finally! Ya better send 'em quick! -click-"

...

He realized he never gave the agent his address & had to start the process all over again

Levi:

Lol

Tried online chat but his specific issue needed a real agent because...of course it would

Tried to pay one of his brothers to make the call for him

They rather stab themselves or wage war against Diavolo than call customer service

Took anxiety medication before trying to call

Waited three hours on hold but played something soothing in the meantime

helloooo ruri and friends crossing

He stopped when he heard the hold music stop

"Hello thank you for calling Akuz-"

click

"It's not that important."

Satan:

This is how a pro does it.jpg

Drank his little coffee and ate his fresh little pastry

See, he set an alarm to call customer service right when they open their lines

Had the number typed and ready to go with a press

BEEPBEEPBEEPBEEP

Finally!

-dialing tone-

"Hello. Your wait time is 2 hours and-"

...

...

...

Slammed his phone on the floor and it broke

Went to go fight the company in person

His issue got fixed

The company had to tighten their security after this incident

Asmo:

Is that one lucky demon that happens to get patched through quickly

He was having problems with his devilgram account verification

Just as he started speaking about his issue the agent freaked out

Turns out they were a huge fan and could automatically tell it was the REAL™️ Asmo speaking

The issue got fixed and Asmo stayed talking with the agent because they sounded really cute

One thing led to another and...it went from a customer service hotline to a phone sex one real quick

This always happens when he calls customer service akskjfksls

Beel:

Collected all the snacks he had

Even cooked an entire feast

He needed everything he could get before making the dreaded call

After an hour of waiting (and barely any snacks left) he finally got to an agent!

It was a pleasant experience for both sides

Beel is getting sent replacements for his shoes plus a discount voucher for his next purchase

güd boi™️ as usual

Belphie:

Almost fell asleep while waiting

The music soothed him, they had classical music playing

He's not really sure how long he waited if he's being honest

When he finally got to the agent he sounded so weak the agent was concerned

"Mm? No I'm always like ...losing... consciousness ...it's normal...zzz..."

The agent was still so concerned they sent someone to the HOL to check on him

Beel ended up making the call for him

⬦You might also like: Coconut︱Devil-Mart⭐︱Waffle House

[aikoiya]

LoZ - Yiga!Link is a Riot

I gotta say that the concept of Yiga!Link is effing hilarious. Especially if it's Zelink.

Because, think about it.

In this situation, Ganon has literally everything lined up perfectly. Link, his eons-long, multi-life arch-nemesis is essentially his minion & he likely doesn't even know it.

Kid's probably deep into the sauce too, man.

Then, either along comes this pretty little princess & he's like, "yeah, sorry bro, but I'm gettin' me some of that." Maybe he was kidnapped as a baby & Link & Zelda met previously as kids? Maybe she did something for him that he'd never forgotten, then when they remeet, she does something for him that seals a huge crush on her, & thus can't bring himself to kill her? I dunno, there's a lot of ways this could go. OR, he learns personally that he's the Chosen Hero, the very person he's supposed to despise & kill. Meaning that if the other members learn about it, they'll likely kill him. His whole life comes crashing down around him. The first blow to the cult's programming.

Like, it'd just be such a power move on destiny's part.

Like, as dangerous as Ganon obviously is, he simply does not win for very long. He always looses eventually.

And this would just cement that fact. Like, he had his effing arch-nemesis in the palm of his fucking hand & didn't even know it & he'll still fucking lose.

I dunno about you, but I'd be pretty damn demoralized after that.

I might just need the next 10,000 years dead before my next reincarnation to mentally recover.

---

At the same time, it does make me wonder. Why do non-Sheikah Yiga stick with them? Like, we know the reason why the Yiga was originally formed. A Hylian King from 10,000 years ago forced the Sheikah to decommission their technology, fearing it'd bring about Hyrule's demise. (Which, despite how unfair it was, he was... actually right. Makes me wonder if he actually learned that the Sheikah Tech could be taken over. Maybe he'd been an accomplished mage & had managed to use his magic to take control of the machines, then realizing that he likely wouldn't be around for the next Calamity, he ordered the Sheikah to find a way to prevent the machines from being possessed by magic. But no matter what they did, they couldn't manage to figure it out, or maybe they did for a while, but the king kept testing them to make sure it was fixed. However, much like hacking in real life, there will always be new ways to exploit the system, thus the king was left with no choice but to decommission them.)

But, anyway, what exactly do they tell their members to get them to want to stay? Hell, why were they even still a thing in BotW? Why hadn't they made their move? There were no more guards, or soldiers, only a few trained Sheikah, all of which were either too old to keep fighting or were swiftly getting there, & there'd been no royal family besides Zelda, who was keeping Calamity Ganon sealed away.

Why didn't they take over the rest of Hyrule, asserting their dominance & killing all the loyalists so that when the Hero returned, he'd be an outlaw, thus making his journey harder? (It certainly wouldn't have been the first time something like that would've happened in the series.) In fact, why reveal themselves to him when they meet? Just wait till his back is turned, then Eightfold Blade him in the back! Or have a Yiga replace the Sheikah & Hylian innkeepers/Stable Managers, then when Link rents a bed for the night, give him a poisoned complementary meal! Then, when he collapses, just execute him!

It's that easy! Or it should be, because they're effing ninja!

I mean, they were perfectly fine with killing Dorian's wife, who Dorian had been a member of the Yiga before, thus they've no issue with the act of killing.

Which, btw, why didn't they instead kidnap her, maybe even his daughters too, & use them as blackmail to keep him under their thumb?

LoZ Wild Masterlist

LoZ My Fanfic Masterlist

[arcadiabaytornado]

please tell me that i wasn't the only one being uncomfortable about chloe and david's relationship in lis 2.

like, i'm not saying their relationship is inappropriate, or that i don't think chloe would reach out if she found out he was alive, or that they wouldn't manage to form an emotional bond (being two of arcadia bay's only survivors and both losing joyce price do that to you) especially considering the fact that chloe is still grateful david saved max from jefferson and stuff.

i'm saying that i'm CONVINCED chloe would never see david as a father figure. imo they exagerrated their bond in lis 2. like, c'mon, the guy is calling her ''her daughter'', not to mention he said something like ''your old man doesn't fear the cold'' or whatever in the phone call. like— bro's acting like her actual father. and while i can totally see david desperate for chloe to consider him that way (i think we'd seen a hint of that in bts) i can't see chloe going that far. she can probably have a great relationship with him (after a lot of talking, mind me), but she's not gonna call him ''dad'' either.

(anyway that was longer than i thought lmao sorry for the ranting)

I have such complicated feelings on David and Chloe's Lis 2 relationship, and a lot of my thoughts line up with yours!

I'm not actually opposed to Chloe and David being on speaking terms after the storm. If you combine the facts that: A: They aren't living in the same house anymore and Joyce isn't around to enable David. Therefore, David has lost all the power he had over her. B: They were both one of the few survivors of the storm. I think it makes sense that they would reach out to each other after something so traumatic. C: They both share a grief for Joyce. D: Chloe seemed a little more open to David after she learned he saved Max. E: David seems to have pulled his shit together. Then...yeah I see why they would be in each others lives.

However, their relationship was a little much (at least in my opinion), considering a big issue in BTS and LIS is David trying to force himself into a Father role. That is a role Chloe has always been shown to hold for William, and while step-parents can be 100% a parental figure, the child in the situation needs to be open to that. And Chloe always been hesitant about the idea.

Personally, I would have preferred them to talk, but with David being more of an uncle figure than a father figure if that makes sense?? Like yeah, they're closer now, and they're a part of each other's lives, but David still isn't the Father figure he tried to force himself to be. I think it would have really shown his growth if he could have accepted that and rebuilt his relationship with Chloe outside of the "Dad" box.

That isn't what we got, but it's what I would have preferred! So, yeah, a lot of my thoughts align with yours. I'm not opposed to them speaking, but I do wish their dynamic was toned down a bit.

[celabi]

I feel like I should put a TW here but I don't know what terms to put specifically so I'll just say I talk a lot about the negative aspects to autistic special interests (specifically really intense ones since I feel like special interests don't get shown in this sort of light much even though it is absolutely an experience that comes with autism?) , mentions of dizzy spells, sleep deprivation, fainting, lack of eating (not intentional/not eating disorder related), overall bad living habits, meltdown mentions, minor mentions of self injurious self-soothing stims, honestly near the end this just becomes a word vomit of me obsessing over Scara with an autistic reader in general near the end because genshin and this man specifically have an absolute chokehold on my poor weak autistic ass and 90% may or may not be my personal experience lmao bye- I probably missed some TWs but like just know there's a lot- I don't know I am going insane lmao

Okay so I know the consensus headcanon wise with scummy Scara is that when it comes to the reader doing things or asking for things his spine is essentially the equivalent of a wet tissue some left on a counter and forgotten about but like- What if he were in a scenario where the reader doing whatever they want was an active detriment to their own health?

Like the main idea in my head since it's an issue I myself suffer with really greatly is like what if he was with an autistic reader who experiences extremely intense special interests and forgets to perform basic tasks like eating, showering or even sleeping as a result of their interest being so intense and unmanaged? Cause it's like on one end bro wants to be supportive towards them and their interest, especially if like they've mentioned that they bring up the thing so much because they're autistic and it's their special interest, no way in hell is bro gonna skip the chance to be seen as an ally to the reader in that sense. Bro would probably yell at the fucking sun like an absolute mad man for making everything so bright and overstimulating if his poor darling ended up being overloaded by it and had a meltdown- But on the other he's watching them develop intense dizzy spells and like seeing them struggle to take two steps to the couch or to a chair while dazed as hell and whenever it's brought up they're just "Oh it's fine, I was just up till 6 in the morning last night because I was doing something related to my interest-". Or like he'll ask them when the last time they ate a proper meal was and they'll just "Oh I forgot I had to do that" or "Well I ate a chocolate bar like a day ago so that should be fine right?" And bro is just internally panicking like "No that is not fine how are you even alive?????"

And it's like he can't just cut the interest out completely since it's basically integral for the reader to have their special interest fix daily otherwise it can be really detrimental to them mentally and he doesn't wanna put them through that distress but like it's not like he would be able to like introduce them to a healthier routine either since like Motherfucker does it look like he knows what a healthy routine is?

Like bro is literally just out here like

"Babe I love you and I'm glad you're passionate about something but please, please go to sleep it's almost 7 in the morning I'm worried" he says knowing full well he was probably playing Valorant or something and would probably end up pulling an all nighter- Don't question how he knows they were up, it's definitely not like he's monitoring them through some cameras he managed to set up in their room

"Sweetie please tell me you ate something yesterday- Wait what do you mean you skipped dinner last night???? No a packet of chips doesn't count, You're lucky I happened to bring some extra leftovers" yes he probably invited himself over to make them a proper meal tailored to their preferences after this 🥰

The reader has an incident where they end up fainting while doing basically nothing cause their body was just done and Scara's immediately invited himself over for the week just to make sure they don't have any other complications or episodes- Probably even offers to bathe with them just in case they end up fainting while in the bath or shower-

Also not related to the health negligence but still on the topic of him with an autistic reader I love the idea of him letting the reader like scratch and claw at his arm (he doesn't care since he already does it himself) whenever they're experiencing a meltdown just so they can like get the "self-soothing" from it without them doing it to themselves- Although he probably struggles with giving them space when they need it- Also bro probably feels so fucking bad in the early days of like learning how to help them out when they're having a meltdown when he finds out him constantly asking questions about what happened made it worse for them since they can't physically speak in that state and asking questions just draws their attention to that and makes them feel even more helpless and overstimmed than before- He had his heart in the right place though :(

And God forbid if anyone makes an offhand comment about the reader acting a little "weird " socially bro has a whole "Uhm actually they're autistic you dick-" essay ready to go even if the person was nice about it- Qnd God forbid they did mean to mock them, bro is immediately on offensive mode even though he'll probably end up getting his own ass beat-

He probably doesn't care if he has to help them cut their own food because they struggle with the actual motor function required to do it properly- He'll happily do it for them- If they're in public and he has to do it he doesn't care, if anyone wants to give him or god forbid his darling weird looks then they can mind their own fucking business- Maybe he'll have to remember that person for later, just to make sure they get the memo-

ALSO assuming he's also autistic (hahaha not me projecting myself on him at all lmao) the dynamic is just the "Me and the autistic bad bitch I pulled by also being autistic-"

I don't even know if this is comprehensible or if I've just gone insane lmao- I nearly fainted at work yesterday because I stupidly stayed up till 4 in the morning playing Genshin because I have yet to manage my intense special interest towards it yet and my brain is scrambled to all hell- No thoughts, head empty, Only Genshin and Scara with his autistic bad bitch reader-

Also tried to make this open for anyone else who has autism too but it's probably really heavily injected with my own personal experience because I don't know how else to like talk about those things so like- I tried to make it open but it's difficult-

👀👀👀👀 wow I loved this so much it’s so interesting <3333 he just he just he just 🥹🥹🥹 trying to help reader while also trying to help himself r ahhhhh “bae go to sleep it’s 3 am” but he’s also awake and can’t sleep ahh in love. He’s always reminding you to do things he knows you would have looked past on, like showering and sleeping , and he’s no cook, but will whip up 5 course meals when he knows you haven’t been eating 🥺🥺

[youremyheaven]

girl your moon post was so accurate for me too! my father has rohini rising and is such a narcissist and a master at gaslighting. he resorted to manipulating ppl's perspective of me ig so they wouldn't believe me when i started calling him out after a liiiifetime of his crap. he is extremely two faced and a lot of ppl find him really sketchy, but those he manages to fool he fools really well. the only positives of this is that at least i can see these patterns in people easily. frankly, confronting a liar is so taxing bc even if you do manage to outsmart them they'll just make some excuse. like girl. i also know this hasta moon girl that is a pathological liar and every time i see her i just can't take anything she says seriously bc i just always feel like she's lying out of her ass ab the most menial stuff. her family has had issues w her bc she skipped school for months and no one knew ab it bc she would tell such bold lies like, "call my teacher. here, have the phone so you can talk to her ab my grades" and everyone was like, ig she's doing well in school otherwise she wouldn't offer to call? i genuinely worry thinking ab what if i have a kid and they have a moon nakshatra and express it negatively like this omg i'll go crazy. anyways thank you for your post it was so interesting to see such thoroughly explained examples 🤍 it reminded me of ariana grande as well who just seems so shamelessly manipulative to me too. like when she's like "for total transparency i'll say that..." i'm immediately like ok. so you're lying 😂

im glad 😭😭😭that my Moon post resonated with so many of you, it means so much to me

Im so sorry about your father. I agree with what you said about confronting liars, I confronted someone about something deeply hurtful that they said to me and they literally said "i don't remember" 😭😭 idk how these people sleep at night bro like do they not have a conscience??

I'm happy every time some shady person is exposed in the media, including Ariana who I've found sus for yearsss ,, it's so hard to be an intuitive bc u can't even explain why u feel the way u do so no one believes you when u say that somebody is not what they seem on the outside, u get torn apart for speaking the truth but sooner or later the truth will be seen and will be heard and I truly believe that.

I hope you remain protected from abuse of all kinds in the future and always surrounded by kindness and support. 💛💛

GIRLIEEE what u said about kids is sooo 😭😭I do think about that from time to time but i believe that kids are a manifestation of our karma so the more we focus on bettering ourselves and thereby bettering our actions, we can design our lives to be drama free. What kind of children we have depends on what kind of parents we're capable of being (and you are completely in control of how you behave/treat others) so don't feel too powerless about ur future kids!!! Focus on yourself and your healing and the rest will flow💛💛💛 also if you believe in manifestation 👀just believe that you'll manifest healthy and wonderful children

This blog is a hobby of mine but what makes all my research and writing meaningful is the fact that not only do I get to learn more about astrology, I get to reach people who perhaps might benefit from the things I share. I love to hear about your guys experiences related to the things I post bc sometimes I genuinely wonder like is anyone even reading my 5k words slander on a nakshatra lmfao

Thank you so much for taking the time to tell me about your experiences, I appreciate it so much 💛and i believe many others will also feel seen

[tossawary]

Hello ! Once you mentioned an au where airplane!sqh transmigrated into post-canon pidw as the og sqh and seduced mbj. I was wondering how you think he would manage it ? (Sorry for my english btw)

Hello! Thank you for taking the time to communicate with me in a language that isn't your native one!

Ooh, I vaguely remember that one. Oh, that was ages ago. Hm, that could go a bunch of different ways, depending on what story you wanted to write.

The first thing to come to mind is just straight-up telling Mobei-Jun that he's not the Original Shang Qinghua, but a different person. Either he reveals transmigration or he claims that he's a Shang Qinghua from another universe. And Mobei-Jun allowing the excuse out of boredom and vague curiosity at first, just to see what Shang Qinghua will do and maybe torment him a little before killing him again. But eventually coming to believe it.

Along those lines, another option is claiming amnesia. That would go very similarly, I think. I tend to headcanon Mobei-Jun as actually being quite sharp and extremely observant, when it comes to things he cares about. With Shang Qinghua, most of the time, Mobei-Jun is just without the context or emotional processing abilities to come to the correct conclusion with his observations.

So, I have difficulty imagining a universe where Mobei-Jun couldn't actually TELL that Original Shang Qinghua and Airplane Bro are different people. I don't think they were that similar at all. I imagine Original Shang Qinghua as a Jin Guangyao or a Su She type, whereas Airplane Bro is just... there's no one like Airplane Bro. He's a weirdo. He talks like no one else on this PLANET. I headcanon him as talking with his hands nonstop. I don't tend to write this angle as much as I possibly should, but he's a pervert, head over heels for Mobei-Jun, in his own clingy-with-commitment-issues way, and I headcanon Original SQH as looking down on Mobei-Jun. Airplane Bro is SO BAD at hiding that he's a transmigrator.

Based on these personal headcanons, the third option that comes to mind would probably go along similar lines. Instead of revealing transmigration or claiming amnesia, Airplane Bro would apologize profusely and beg for his life, and PIDW Mobei-Jun would allow it probably out of boredom and vague curiosity. Like, he and Luo Binghe have already conquered the world already. What else is he going to do rather than keep the resurrected traitor around as his own personal jester for a while? Why the fuck not?

And then I guess Airplane Bro would just do what he always does, which is be himself. Weird as hell. Strangely useful. Completely inexplicable in his manners and knowledge. Incredibly entertaining to watch fumble around, like some kind of cultivator physical comedian, or like watching a mongoose scream at a lion. I've always held the headcanon that Mobei-Jun thinks Airplane Bro is funny. Like, Airplane Bro's bitchy commentary on PIDW's Luo Binghe's latest harem drama almost makes putting up with it bearable.

He's also willing to risk his life to save Mobei-Jun, despite the ice demon showing him no respect at best, treating him like shit at worst. If I had to come up with a more serious plot for this fic than a dark romantic comedy, I think it would be kind of fun to have Airplane Bro go up against PIDW Luo Binghe for PIDW Mobei-Jun.

So PIDW Mobei-Jun has to have this horrible, "I'm in love with the impossible creature possessing an undead traitor and acting like my court jester," moment. And then he has to have some, "AND LUO BINGHE IS GOING TO KILL HIM," moment.

Mobei-Jun: "Wait, my jester has killed the Demon Emperor."

Mobei-Jun: "...How???"

Mobei-Jun: "Wait, does that make me Demon Emperor now???"

Mobei-Jun: "...I'm not keeping the harem."

Mobei-Jun: "...I'm keeping the jester."

Even odds whether or not Mobei-Jun actually takes the position as Demon Emperor or forces Shang Qinghua, who killed Luo Binghe, to become "Demon Emperor".

On one hand, I think it would be funny for Mobei-Jun to install himself as Shang Qinghua right-hand man and straight-up refuse to deal with this shit. Nope. He has built his entire career on being someone else's lackey and he's not cleaning up the harem problem. On the other hand, I think Airplane Bro deserves to fuck Demon Emperor PIDW Mobei-Jun if he wants. Very sexy.

[windlion]

Malevolent podcast scream-along part 2, let's go!

Roll out of hospital bed, defeat a demon, stagger out into the morning streets with a complete lack of medical discharge-- yep this fits the genre

Ep title: "The Hill." Could it, perhaps, be a Silent Hill?

Let's just assume John-the-Passenger is providing some convenient CON boosts

And either John gave him control of the hand back or this impromptu jam session is a lot more impressive than it first seems

This hits me every time but you guys did not look into the currency value for the supposed time period and I'm just all ". . . well it's already an AU anyways"

(Otherwise SOMEONE lost a hat with like several years' wages in it and I hope those were smaller bills or Arthur is going to be one even-more-conspicuous MFer)

Speaking of: did you really just waltz into a store and ask for a big ass gun, ammo, flashlights, and a crowbar. Did you. Really.

WITH NO ID AND NO STORY

Could you *at least* have presented that in a less suspicious way!

Jon from TMA and Arthur solidarity in being absolute shit at telling lies

Actually they probably had f' all ID requirements in the time period

And then *everyone* is shady/eldritch as fuck! Woo!

You might mention the murder as a reason to be buying a gun?!

Writer nitpick: this is just personal opinion but I like my bullshit to feel grounded, so there's a solid baseline of reality vs Everything Else. . . but it could also be an entirely valid approach to have the narrator being increasingly unreliable and detached from reality because: Cthulhu.

OH delightful it's Creepy Old Lady, round two

*sounds of distant death* Arthur, "Time to be a good Samaritan and die horribly!"

This clearly is going to end well!

"Everyone is *wrong*" YOU DON'T SAY, JOHN

I am waiting for the partner to Come Back Wrong and for that to be why he's not being charged with murder yet because there was not actually a corpse - aside from the possibly-possessed janitor

Arthur: "This is not fast-forwarding fast enough for me!"

John: "You can only trust me, Arthur."

Time to go find your boat with a head in it!

Okay, fine, any boat can have a severed head in it, just give it time. I believe in you, boys

Just two bros. In a boat. Singing love tunes. Chilling 0 ft apart, because one's possessing the other.

John. Eldritch Buddy. You want to sound a little less like a sociopath there, dude

"This is fucked up, clearly we're in the right place."

*squints* ancient graveyard . . . in the US. . . there for centuries . . . why is it European. . .

did you just get suckered into being the new lighthouse keeper

Rude to go tearing up someone's floorboards!

*facepalm* you are not final girl material, Arthur

just got the job and quit again that quickly, for shame

I hope you're prepared for a long swim

Eldritch entity you swing wildly between anger management issues and "Deep breaths, try not to panic"

"Ohhhh Arthur" that's alarmingly sensual

"No part of you is lost to me" *side-eyes*

One thing that's noteworthy to me is that they're not comfortable with silence, that everything has to happen back-to-back, no pauses. Be more confident, linger uncomfortably in your

"I wonder if the voice he heard is this" OR JOHN YOU DIPSHIT

Time for the next cult hideout!

So the mansion was the Black Goat's, who's in residence here?

Oh that's who, howdy, ma'am

and then they find the homemade porn!

Is no one else concerned with the quantity of A names

. . . are you about to become a triple occupancy?

Tentacles! For everyone!

Good times when your eldritch beastie bestie has a mental time out

"Or we could kill her"

You actually took a surprisingly long time to get to the murder plan, you okay?

Uh, eldritch bestie, you should have raised your alarm earlier if you had concerns

Trading off murder sociopath duties, good times

My dude you are definitely not coming across as the most hinged of individuals

. . . this would be an interesting time to just panic and let Satan take the wheel now that Satan doesn't want to drive

exactly 0 people surprised who was responsible for the first death

"Oh this is going to end well" Glad we're on the same page again, bestie

"You must be this much bitch to get admittance" "WELL I GUESS WE'RE BOTH GOING AREN'T WE"

I will be more surprised if any of these people live than the obvious alternative

*looks up from filing nails* Oh, they're dead? Smeared across every surface in the room? You don't say

"Maybe someone's still alive" Do we need to go through this again? Not genre savvy, are we?

Eldritch bestie you are extremely inconsistent, which I suppose ties in well to insanity and gaslighting

"This is our life now" look at that, commitment!

Meat puppet does not enjoy the meaty aspect v much

. . . Why was it so heavy if it was only half?

Ewwwwwww. That will be all.

"did you see it" "DID YOU FORGET I AM BLIND"

Oh, we're doing this again are we

Eldritch bestie you better be paying your rent

Hand in unlovable hand~~~

No really, Lovecraft, what was with all the tentacles

Oh, someone else paid their rent!

I am somewhat amused that everything swears by Christianity aside from the favored F bombs

Right, so this is definitely someone else's playground, eldritch #. . .4?

"We lose guns more than anything else" XD

"It sounded like you" *waving lighter*

And that's Eldritch #5 on the horizon

Time for a screaming head or leviathan maggots?

Eeeeeeey old friend!

Why you lying, why you always be lying

. . . Okay I was worried that was going to be even worse than it was

Aw bestie with domestic daydreams

What's some B&E after a spot of murder?

John did you just make Arthur piss himself over an opossum

A mole-faced possum, you act like you haven't seen one before!

Why you gotta be running from snuffles, what did snuffles ever do to you but SCREEEEEEE

Oh it's you again! Great unhinged minds think alike

And then we're done with ep 10 and time to stop again~

[digitalstowaway]

BRO the exotic vet post is SO true. I have 3 sick pets right now and all my vets are booked till January and I cant find ANY information on how to treat them without antibiotics

I have a pet rn who had to take a trip the emergency vet last week but can't be seen again until later this week. I've been trying to see what I can do to help him rn bc he just seems a little off. But all of the previous reddit posts about similar issues are just "go to a vet."

I saw someone say their reptile would not be able to handle the hour long drive to their emergency vet in their condition and had to wait for their regular clinic to open. Still, the comments didn't seem to understand. It was like. How dare this person not further injure/stress their pet and try to make them comfortable until they could make a trip they could manage. I'm sure that was a difficult decision to make, but I'm sure it was the right one.

It's not an option all the time 😭 exotic vets aren't super common in some areas and get booked up super quickly. Sometimes we have to do our own care.

I hope your pets do well until they can be seen by a vet <3 I know it takes a major toll when your pets aren't feeling well. They can't tell you what they need.

[astraltrickster]

Along the lines of my previous post, and looking at other things currently going down in media ("which ones?" well this post was written on October 16 2022 if you REALLY want to be able to search up specifics, but until everything I've suggested in this post or something like it comes to pass, feel free to fill in from your own imagination because it's a recurrent issue, that's WHY I leave it vague)...I really want to see serious studies done on the psychological impact of repeatedly discovering that the people behind some of your favorite media, behind the stories and bits that helped you through some of the worst times in your life, are just...truly horrible people.

This is More than it ever has been - we're in the middle of the third "once-in-a-lifetime" economic crisis that most people really feeling these hits have lived through, which means that a lot of what we're finding out about is the horrific workplace abuse that's ALWAYS been rampant in the entertainment industry and in many ways is only getting worse under these conditions because the victims have fewer options to escape than ever before, and Twitter exists to let celebrities show their asses themselves, rather than the info having to come out as hard-to-corroborate rumors in gossip mags.

To be clear - I'm not saying it's Better if it happens and we just don't know about it. I'm saying that I want this study to happen as a first step to dismantling celebrity culture as we know it.

In fact, I also want studies on the flip side; just basic observation shows that it's become common for people to be - understandably - extremely guarded about public figures after finding out that a once-beloved children's author fell down a rabbit hole into becoming a political lobbyist for hate groups, or that the rapper they always enjoyed for his eccentricity ended up using that eccentricity to pass his descent into violent bigotry off as a Bit far longer than anyone should have let him get away with, or that the original dev behind their first favorite horror game would sell most of his audience out to fascists to save a buck now that he's rich, or that all along their favorite gamer funny guys were enacting all the toxicity and abusive bullshit of the dark side of both Bro Culture AND corporate entertainment culture behind the scenes, and used that "yeah we're all friends here~" vibe to excuse it and even make it WORSE than average (note: despite the timing, this is NOT vaguing a SINGULAR instance; I'm vaguing MULTIPLE, probably including a few that haven't happened yet); or that their favorite pop stars were patrons of a literal sex trafficking torture ring straight out of The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo - ...the list goes on, and on, and on. So, what does it do to public figures - especially small-time ones, without PR people and social media managers - whose worst crimes are basic, common human flaws such as "was a shitty friend 15 years ago" or "thought they were lovingly roasting their friends in middle school, realized later it was actually just bullying" or "didn't do anything from it besides say some really stupid shit to an insignificantly small audience many years ago, but believed the bigoted misconceptions their parents/culture taught them until the vast amount of information and experiences shown on the internet taught them better", to have that understandable fear taken out on them?

Hint: as someone who has one foot in each side - as someone who's gotten attached to shit that turned out to be monstrous and that very much gives me a fear of getting attached to anything or anyone (on a healthy parasocial level [which does exist, this issue has just kinda skewed the definition of that word], or even personally), and as someone who's been an actor since age 6 - I can tell you that the answer is...Nothing Good. I have nightmares about getting involved in something with more reach than the community theater scene (which I do hope to do one day!), wording something poorly or even outright Being Incorrect about something, and suddenly having people out for my blood. I have nightmares about finding out that my best work friend secretly hates my guts, or is abusing people as soon as my back is turned. It keeps me up at night thinking about all the abuse in the entertainment industry AND the normalized abuse online born from the understandable concern that ANYONE could be the next example in the above paragraph and resulting fear of attachment.

It's...it's bad, guys. It's bad, and we need serious studies into just HOW bad, and we need to use those studies as a jumping off point to DO something about it.

[derealfeelz]

Values: Friends (Kodoku's Lilacs, The Life of a Flowstar No. 28)

I know a few posts ago, I made a post called "Lone Wolf". I guess this is somewhat a sequel, especially since it's talking about my friends and that post was talking about how I wanted to be alone. I'm still the type of guy to be alone, but I still like to talk to my friends then and there, I do got the majority of one I met from school on Snapchat, since it seems like they all use it. Before I do start tho, I'm not gonna name anyone out for reasons.

Funny enough, unless someone manages to get ahold of my email or phone (if they can unlock through it), no one that I know of knows of this page lol. The reason why is because I'm a lil shy and paranoid with showing people stuff, even tho this is being posted public. I even do a bunch of other stuff online that they don't know I do, although I feel like if someone were interested enough and sits down on a computer like me, they'd probably fine out what I do, and hopefully they do that when we're all put of school if they ever do, because that'll be embarrassing.

Anyways, let's get to the topic.

I have a bunch of friends that I can value, especially my virtual friends from 2018-2021 (when we started drifting away from each other, we can still contact eac other if we wanted to). My virtual friends, at the moment of writing this, felt like my true friends, the funniest friends I had. The reason why is because the state before where I'm at now, no one really liked me, then I moved schools and I only got one friend, then moved to where I am now. I wish I could've met them irl now, it's making me a lil nostalgic with those days, playing Minecraft and a few other games, the good old days. I did have this one "friend" tho that had anger issues and although he was somewhat cool we had fun memories, I had to distance myself from him because of his issues and his response wasn't very cool, that's why I don't really go out to the virtual world to make friends.

Now onto my current irl friends, the truest ones. If you remember the situation I mentioned with me and the principal in my recent hospital trip, it was something on Snapchat and I'll explain it fully in a future post, but I accidentally had my friends involved and I thought it was GGs for me lol, but somehow it wasn't. They understood that what I did was kinda stupid, but they also knew the principal was the bigger bitch because of the situation, and I promise you he got mad over something stupid. I feel like they got my back on anything, and that they'd have a good time if I ever came over, just scared tho because my stepdad knew about them and I believe he mentioned that it might be a good idea to tell them about him.

Speaking of the last sentence, I did have a "girlfriend" (Idk if it was even a relationship tbh) for like a month, and when her mom knew about my stepdad, it didn't turn out well, not like visited us, just had her daughter ghost me and not speak to me in person. I say it's fucked up, although Idk the history, but they both could've just made up and I could've had someone for longer (The mom didn't see okay anyway). Won't talk about it anymore as it should've been kept personal and not spoken online, but fuck it, the bros had my back. Anyways, I think in my next post, I might talk about my type of gf that I may like, even tho I'm not interested in a relationship atm. Anyways, peace, always get the bros over hoes.

Sincerely, Kodoku.

[caatws]

Looking at vol 3, at merchandise, taking in some of the conversations people are having it's not escaping me that the stories people tell matter. They have an influence on everything.

I'm prepared to be the odd man out in saying It's not Infinity War that caused the story we got in vol 3. It's not Endgame either. It's James Gunn. The ball was in his court and he dropped it. Gamora still had potential whether from the year 2014 or if she had been ressurected. Using 2014 Gamora was a chance to explore what the guardians had meant to her and her to them at one point in time, and what the ravagers mean to her and her to them currently. You could easily merge these two things and have a rich arc for Gamora that honored who she is and how powerful having family and a purpose can be. It could have shown that Gamora's ability to be more than what Thanos made her has transformed the lives of two different groups of people. All of this could have been done as a subplot while Rocket remained the Protagonist. If vol 3 had been the ensemble story vol 1 and 2 had been it would have been so easy. Instead vol 3 moved away from an ensemble to become the Rocket show. Everything that couldn't be directly linked to him or dealt with quickly while focusing on him received minimal attention. Until the end where suddenly everyone has these life changing revelations and the team disbanded. It ends up working for most of the characters because where they were ending up could still fit around Rocket's story, like Mantis taking off with creatures she just met or Nebula deciding to be responsible for kids they rescued from Rocket's abuser. It's sad because if Gunn really felt it was impossible to have vol 3 be any different he still could have done more with Gamora by connecting history of abuse to Rocket's abuse plot.

There's also a strange irony in how during vol 1 Rocket tells Drax that we all have dead people but it's not an excuse to get other people dead along the way. A whole message about how you may be the protagonist of your own life/story but that doesn't mean other people aren't important. But vol 3 ignores so much of Gamora's life. There was no room in Rocket's story for the family to collectively hurt about losing somebody else. Gamora never should have been killed in the first place but there was still a story that could have been told that did more with her than what we got.

i see where you're coming from anon! i think personally my anger will always be mostly placed toward the russos bc they started us on this messy path in the first place.

i've been an Endgame Hater(TM) since day 1 in 2019 lolll so i might be biased. like at least none of gunn's gotg media has tried to make thanos out to be a sympathetic villain or even suggested that thanos truly "loved" gamora or nebula. but i think gamora was just the biggest fumble in a series of epic fumbles the russo bros managed to make in a 5 hour long story. it's been 4 years but i could still write essays upon essays about my issues with endgame and how it also made iw worse in retrospect. like i was willing to go with the gamora storyline in iw if there were some kind of twist to it in endgame - like if the sacrifice didn't rly fully count so gamora could mess up thanos' plans or avenge herself in some way, or something along those lines - but...nope

but i do agree there were a lot of things that gunn still could've done differently to at least try to recontextualize the events of iw/eg in the gotg framework, especially given the themes of abuse and surviving it at play, that he failed to. he seemed to take an overall unserious approach to the gamora situation instead i guess which lol that's an interesting interpretation of events but ok!

[sanjeev18]

This is the last text Srishti, after this, I'll probably not text you again.

See, not that you owe me anything, if at all, you only gave me happiness, and a new hope. And it's my insecurity and inferiority complex that made you say what you said today.

Srishti, I know who you're, I know who I'm. So in a way for me you're already a celebrity, so in general, I never could imagine you would even talk to me, let alone being friends with you, but there are certain things which happen by universes conspiracy.

Before saying anything else I just wanna say, I love vishwa more than anything else, and I'll as long as I can, of course it's all over between us, she too defenestrated me from her life, but I just wanna clear one thing, I never had, nor have, any any any kind of romantic inclination towards you, I had to specify this because when a guy is just texting these long texts, intentions are often misinterpreted. But of course you're free to have your opinion.

I don't even talk to anyone, I don't believe in friends, yes, that's right, I don't even have one genuine friend. At such point, you came, and god I believed in our friendship, and I repeat again, I always saw you as God's blessing, I mean the Srishti pandey, who has like tonnes of better people to talk to, is my friend, it has to be God's grace, what else, but the way you are supposedly leaving, my faith is getting dim, and I need my faith to remain, so please don't abandon me. I do not need any friendship commitment from you, I don't need you to talk to me, I don't need you to play with me, I just need that whatever good you ever thought about me that you considered me worthy enough to talk to, remains, and my desperation doesn't change that. I didn't text you for last two months right? I wasn't gonna even now, but Srishti, I was dying, I'm suffering, every single day, you know how painful it is to love someone unconditionally for 3 years, crying all night, still not having any dare to say a simple hello to them, and in the end they tell you that they don't even consider you a friend! I mean friend is the most normal thing. Imagine the worthlessness I feel. I have lost my entire self belief, confidence, everything. I'm struggling to focus in chess, all motivation is lost, so who do I go to? That's why, I just texted you, cause it always soothed my heart, that I have a friend to talk to to, and that is you, deep down, I always knew how could you actually consider me a friend, par I thought that's just my insecurity..par even you said it clearly. Of course I must accept it. But yes, I'll fight a little bit, cause years later, I don't wanna say, man thodi koshish karni thi.

Yes, and Srishti, we have personality difference, and I know, I'm just too hard to be friends with, the sufferings I have been through has made me like this, and it's really hard to change, but I'll and I'm trying. But about chess, I'm good, I strongly and completely believe that I'm good and strong enough! And even though it feels so hard to get up right now, I'll manage it on my own.

I just want you to be free from any grudges, don't think galti kardi isse baat karke and all. I'm not itna bhi aisa. I'll stay away. If texting you was as easy, i would never really have stopped cause there were tonnes of things I wanted to talk about.

One more thing, you said I annoyed your friend?

Wow, I won't go much in past, but let's come to January 2020 when she unblocked me, I suppose she had no issues with me then,

Bro, you know she blocked me because of my stories, cause yes, they were full of my feelings, and I used to share tonnes of such stuffs. Writing is what gives me peace, vishwa and me kabhi baat kiye hi nahi, vo bas Meri stories dekh leti thi toh bhi I was like my God.. that was all.. agar usse Meri stories se problem thi, mute Kar deti, par usne block Kiya.. cause of course she had power, par chal she did unblock me and said she didn't mean to hurt me and she admitted she was wrong in blocking me I suppose.

Uske baad se lekar aaj Tak, mene ek story bhi aisi share nahi ki Jo indirectly bhi vishwa ko awkward lage ki uske liye he.. kiya bhi toh I hid it from vishwa, I was always and still scared ki kahi vo vapas block na karde. I haven't slept well in last 6 months, I go to sleep at 5 am. And wake up at 10.. you know, it's impossible to sleep, every single day, where did I annoy her?

Lockdown huaa toh normally ek friend ki tarah ek game ke liye pucha tha bas, usme Kya annoying, itna unworthy? Bas isliye ki i had feelings? Man, it hurts. Then she had you call and tell me ki usko annoy hota he.

Tujhe pata he Tere Bolne ke baad, I deactivated my insta, and vowed ki ab kabhi vishwa ko text nahi karunga..

And I was doing great and fine, even chess wise and life me I was like now I'm good, par then in May, I kind of started worrying again ki kahi vishwa mujhse nafrat toh nahi karti, kahi usey aisa toh nahi lagta ki me bura hu cause I texted you anonymously..

Toh since I couldn't clear it with her, first time I texted you on WhatsApp ki bro does she hate me and all.. mene tujhse help nahi maangi bro.. mene bas tujhse clarify karne bola. Then you suggested ki I should send her memes.. 4 months hence, I have only sent her two memes! Annoying?

Yeah now what actually was annoying to her was something that made me wanna kill myself, I cannot even describe the pain,

Bro, she was playing online 15+10 against different players. No it doesn't concern me, of course not, we are chess players we will play, par mujhe kaisa laga hoga, I was thinking all time ki shayad vishwa busy hogi, khelti nahi hogi isliye mere saath nahi kheli..me toh ussi moment me soch Raha tha ki world should end right now.. the pain I cannot even put up in words..

I wanted to text her there and then, par I refrained cause of course fear of getting blocked, falling in her eyes.

Toh I waited for few days, suffered, then Socha maybe I should try to ask her once more about playing. Toh then I dared to ask her to play, and iske baad ka I already have told you before..

Yeah the only thing I feel bad about is texting her that I miss her, given I'm not really in any kind of in that place with her, should never have texted her that, and that was the only time I actually wanted you to help me, you know why, cause bro, I didn't want to lose our friendship, since we were on talking terms back then, and I was so scared after texting vishwa that, and I thought ki vo tujhe bolegi then of course vo Teri best friend he toh you'll also hate me, toh isliye mene tujhe saamne se bataya ki mene usse aisa text kiaa. Then you said ki you'll ask her, toh I normally added ki ask her to not hate me or block me and I will not repeat it. Uske baad toh you know what happened. Vishwa didn't reply, you did, asked me angrily to stay away from her. And even threatened to block me. Uss din ke baad I never texted you Srishti, until today, and now I realize I shouldn't have, it was better to be in delusion that we are friends. Wasn't really bad. Ab I don't know why you think I annoyed her, and tujhe beech me laaya. Haa irritate toh Hui vo, par if I'll send you the texts I never send her, tu khud sochegi ki..

Srishti, I may not be as high class as you guys are, yeah I'm not, I can't even look in your eyes. Par I too have feelings, and I do value and treasure some people in my life, I want to talk to them, I feel like being with them, and I too feel like fighting for them if even with them.

But all this said, the bottom line is I'm nobody, and I must leave. I am. But please please, let's end it on a good note.

Cause I know, one simply doesn't say "I don't consider you a friend" to someone you know is going through hell.. and not a person like you, so bada Dil rakh, and remain assured I'll not always text you. I just don't want my blessing to go away like this.

[minteyeddevil]

this is living rent free in my head

a teen!MC that before the devildom was bullied, but after returning to the human realm, their confidence was up the ROOF, because the pacts with 7 of their big bros protect them from anything

when their bullies start to mess with them again, they threat with summoning x brother, but the bullies just laugh it off like the 8th grade syndrome

UNTIL ONE DAY MC HAS HAD ENOUGH WITH THEIR SHIT AND SUMMONS ONE OF THE BROTHERS.

how would they react?

i'm sorry

(Hey don’t be sorry! If I had the ability to summon a demon to help me with assholes messing with me I’d do that too lmao xD)

---

Lucifer:

The Avatar of Pride is immediately in full demon form the moment he is summoned, and towering over everyone. He is ready to make heads roll, but the moment he just hears high pitch screaming, he kind of recoils and looks to see a group of teenagers running away from him. He notices MC behind him, just smirking all triumphant and he gives a deep sigh, trying his best not to roll his eyes.

Of course when they explain how that group of teens had been bulling them, he doesn’t lecture them too hard about summoning him for more urgent issues; he gives them charms and small potions to use instead that could help defend them. If things really don’t get better with the bullies, he will find a way to take care of them for MC.

Mammon:

Boom! Avatar of Greed is in the house and ready to rumble! He’s looking all over for the things he needs to fight, only to find a group of teenagers staring at him in wide-eyed horror. He notices MC standing behind him, anger radiating off their body, and he picks up right away that, even though they are scared shit-less, these teens have been trouble for MC. He bears his fangs and towers over the group, growling at them that if they don’t leave MC alone he is going to devour their souls.

They scream in horror and run away as fast they can, leaving behind a smirking Mammon and a finally relieved MC. He gives them a fist bump and tells them if those bastards ever bother them again just to call him up. He’s got a few tricks up his sleeve he can use on them.

Leviathan:

MC summoned him? Something must seriously be wrong! He’s in full demon mode, tail slashing around as he appears in front of them, only to freeze when he sees a group of teenagers staring at him. Confusion is splayed all over his face, until he turns back to MC, seeing how they are bruised up and shaking. Rage fills him suddenly and he turns back to the teens snarling, “Did you hurt MC?!” The fear only heightens in their faces at his question, and he lunges for them, managing to snag on by the arm while the others run for their lives.

“If you lay another finger on MC, I will personally cut you up into tiny pieces and feed you to Lotan,” he growls at the teen, nails tearing up their shirt sleeve. Seeing as how they are just a puny human, he figures a threat is enough to make them go away, and they certainly do so with lightning fast speed. He turns his attention back to MC, checking them over and making sure they are okay.

Satan:

He appears fully composed, not even in demon form yet, as he turns to address MC first. He wants to know what is going on, taking in the whole situation before acting out. Though coming face to face with the bullies he has heard about before, he slowly begins walking up to them, his demon form slowly creeping over him. His eyes seem to slit as he leans down to be eye level with the group of teenagers, fangs showing as he address them. “If you have any value for your lives, I would avoid tormenting MC further. Because if I find you touched a single hair on their head, your lives are forfeit.”

They stand stock still, frozen in pure fear, until Satan gives a deep hiss at them and they run away screaming. He chuckles to himself at how pathetic those humans were, and turns back to MC, talking to them about a book he found that they could use to help them come up with ways to get back at their bullies.

Asmodeus:

He literally poofs up next to MC, full demon mode on, and first coddles over them to make sure they are alright. He frowns at the bruises and cuts, telling them he will tend to them in a moment, as he turns to the group of teens, a malicious smile on his features. “Oh little humans, you’ve made such a grave mistake. Hurting my precious MC like this...oh, that just won’t do.” He will magically bind them together and hang them from a tree, upside down. He could easily kill them, but seeing as they are merely humans (and not to mention it could cause trouble for MC), he sees this as a fit punishment for them.

He walks MC home, taking on his Human Realm form, and helps tend to their cuts and bruises, telling them to always call on him when they need his help.

Beelzebub:

Beel is a giant brick wall of a demon, so the moment he appears before MC, he is towering over these teenagers. All he has to do is frown and glare down at them, and they will immediately take off running. Hell, they may also stand there in complete awe of the demon, but he would just take a step forward and snarl, they’d be screaming and scrambling over themselves to get away. Part of him would want to give chase, even eat them if he could; but he stays put so as to not cause trouble for MC.

He pats them on the head and asks them if they are alright now, hoping that he did a good job in helping them. He might ask them to take him to the nearest restaurant or fast food place to get something to eat though, since he hardly ever gets to be in the Human Realm, lol.

Belphegor:

Half asleep, but in his demon form, Belphie will show up and cross his arms as he stares down the group of teens in annoyance. “Really? These humans have the nerve to mess with you, MC? Pathetic.” He’ll start walking towards them, a dark smirk on his features as his tail slashes behind him, but the moment they start screaming and turn around to run, he stops. “Ugh, I don’t wanna chase them. Too much work.”

He’ll walk over to MC and yawn, telling them that they interrupted his nap. If they need help with these bullies again, it’s cool if they want to call on him again, but he would much prefer if they call one of his other brothers, so he can just stay napping instead, lol.