#Magic Unicorn Horse Care Game

[arodykeism]

time to make your choice only you can be the one

[fizzingwizard]

all sims youtubers want to talk about is cars and fairies, cars and fairies. especially cars cars cars cars cars.

i do not want cars cars cars cars cars. i could care less about fairies. the cars thing in particular i dont understand. sims is not about to become an open world. the most you'll be able to do is drive slowly around your neighborhood. and only in certain worlds (there'd be absolutely no point in doing that in willow creek for example bahahaha). maybe they'll give us a track like the horse racing ones and you can watch the car just go around in circles destination nowhere. for real y'all what are you expecting from a cars pack??? inquiring minds want to know

what I do want ever so much:

MORE INSTRUMENTS. let me make a band. let me be a singer in the band!! expand the singing skill! expand the options on the microphone! karaoke does not cut it! really i just want garage band tho no get famous nonsense. let's busk in the park together. let me play more than just three string instruments x'D flute harmonica saxophone drum kit plz and thank u

more non-American/European locations. they honestly did a pretty decent job on mt komorebi. now how about a world where the beautiful architecture that came in the oasis whatever pack would fit right in? how about a jungle world which is themed around the people who actually live there and not indiana jones.

dine out refresh? uhhh how about REALM OF MAGIC complete redo? like this is the only thing that would sell me on fairies, if it overhauled the magic in the game completely. realm of magic was such a promising yet such an empty pack. I especially hate that your options are "be a nice wizard who cleans things and makes flowers grow" or "be evil," and 2/3 of the spells you can learn are evil spells. and yes your rep does take a hit if you cast evil magic. even if you do it for good (like lighting someone on fire because someone else just hit them with the freeze ray and they're encased in ice... oh you saved their life SO WHAT you still set them on fire you EVIL WIZARD you). like what.

gardening visuals overhaul. I'm stoked about the increased usage for gardening with the cooking skill updates. I just wish gardening looked nicer. the plants that came with base game pretty much look the same. that's why when builders on youtube make gardens and farms they use debug plants to make them look more realistic. the plants that came in cottage living are great. really wish they'd just update all the older visuals for gardening. at this point there's so many cottage-y garden-y games out there that have nice plants and flowers it's like sims y'all can't compete. which is a bummer because gardening is somehow a huuuge part of sims 4. (and while you're at it update the base game food visuals too!!)

rowboats. plus lakes and ponds updated so you can row out on them, and the ability to go fishing on the boat. i think you can on the island living boat?? i dont remember but anyway that boat is too huge for anywhere outside of sulani so how about they just grab one of the many debug rowboats and make it functional. please??? fishing skill would be so much more enjoyable if i could do it in a boat instead of just standing in one spot.

okay my real wish is more boats in general this is really specific but i would buy a boat pack lightning fast. give me kayaking give me white water rafting give me going over a waterfall in a barrel hahahaha. i used to love going out in boats rl but it's now been many years since I had the opportunity. please let me live vicariously through my sims ;_;

new cool rewards in the vein of storm chaser and stuff would be nice...

I know I've made a post juuuust like this before and probably make one like clockwork every time people start going off about cars and fairies cars and fairies. but my wishes, as well as cars and fairies, remain unanswered. so here we are :P

[its-sunny-somewhere-else]

OMORI PONIES for fun as cope. Ironically the real world ones are more colorful than the dreamworld ones lol

Sunny/Omori

Unicorn. I kind of just thought "whatever go dull" at first but then I thought it'd be interesting if part of the reason his dreams and nightmares are so detailed/fucked up as hell is because of some magic going fucked up, seemed cute in a way.

The cutie mark for Sunny is a sun (NAME) but it's also got a crescent moon shape over it, sort of ominous. One random line from the game that stuck with me was an NPC in the dreamworld or something saying "the moon shines brightly today", as the sky in it always fascinated me with how strange it seemed and how it's Always Nighttime and how that goes thematically with his real name being Sunny but not in this world.

Omori's is the demon because ofc his existence is defined by it. Sometimes it disappears.

Colorwise, Sunny's coat is supposed to be a brighter yellow but is very dull right now..

Mari

Unicorn also to match with her brother, and because one of the first things you notice about her in the dreamworld is her teleporting all the time. Seems magic to me!

The cutiemark is a picnic blanket. If I had more space I'd do the basket. It's very iconic Mari imagery, plus it signals both her ability to cook and her care for others!

She's a light purple in the real world, which is tied to everyone being purple in the dream world sort of like how in the game she wanted to dye her hair purple before she died and because of that everyone in the dream world has purple hair.

Kel

Pegasus because I felt like it fit his "free" personality. He's a blank flank in the dream world! He hadn't gotten his yet the last time Sunny saw him. During the four years Sunny was hiding, Kel got one, so he missed out on that. I haven't exactly thought of what it is, though.

He's blue with orange hair because I associate orange with Kel and the blue just seems to work to me.

Hero

Pegasus to match his brother. Without wings how could he catch up with him to make sure he stays out of trouble! hehe. Also makes him seem COOL

His coat is orange, like Kel's hair to show they're related, and his hair is darker blue! His cutiemark is a hero sandwich XD I THOUGHT IT WAS FUNNY he likes to cook, and it's what he's named after! hehe

Aubrey

Earth pony, because those are associated with having more strength.

She also may have been a blank flank, but I think it's funny to retranslate her dialogue when it comes to tagging where she says "I'm not sure Kel even has a talent" or something along those lines to being about his blank flank lol. The cutiemark she has in the future at least is of her baseball bat. How do horses hold bats? You tell me, they do it in the show. CARTOON WHO CARES

She's blue (or maybe closer to teal, I might do that) because it's a nice vibrant color and matches her headband in the future. It goes well with pink or black hair.

Basil

Earth pony, association with plants and farming. Definitely a good pick for him.

The cutiemark is clearer in the real world version. It's a flower, but the center of it is a camera lens. He's obviously the flower boy, and the camera is INCREDIBLY important to his story both in the dreamworld and real world.

[hottubraccoon]

Kamikita; Land of Patience and Glory

south west corner of the continent, primarily human citizens

Costume from Dracula Untold.

Games:

Stemming from their religion, aeon coin games are popular throughout Kamikita. The richer people will use magical seals in place of playing coins, and collecting seals/coins from different people and places is a place of pride for the more adamant players. Soldiers enjoy GK's knight tourneys, specifically their dragon taming and elemental fights.

Clothes:

Humans use silks and cotton a lot more than other materials in their clothes, any furs are saved for large seasonal cloaks, and leather is used in light armour more than average clothing. Kamikita and GK have a lot of style similarities, bright colours and fun patterns, the important distinction is that floral patterns are reserved for royals in Kamikita. But with Birkina and Solistal, humans are easy to find in the crowd. The common patterns in lower class humans are dragons and suns. Formalwear is a kimono and far more plain, still light and colourful, but one solid colour with a solid obi belt. High class often make up for this by bringing delicate sun umbrellas.

Food:

The major foods in Kamikita are wheat products, fruits, and their cattle meat. Because they have such a stable and mass produced agriculture, their hunting, trapping and fishing areas are less practiced, many in the profession coming from other areas in Klenith.

Animals/Plants:

Because this is fantasy Japan, the usual flora/fauna are going to mimic real life. so here I will talk about the fantasy creatures and how they interact with stuff and things :) Due to the coastal conditions here, there are no harpies, hydra or sea serpents, and the travel between Kamikita and Birkina keep the waters a well-traveled and safe area. There are mermaids but many keep their distance and the few that do approach the surface are looking to trade for the fruits of Kamikita's shores. Kamikita is also the only nation to house unicorns, and while pegasus do visit no wild ones are here. The fae and dryads have a huge population in the forests here, whatever their preferences may be, they seem to find it in this nation. Despite the natural flourishing here, treants are scarce. Perhaps they fear the more obvious sightings of dragons here. Outside of the fantastical, cats are hugely popular in the cities. They are lap warmers and aren't owned by any one person, but cared for by their cities as a whole. Dogs are common as workers alongside horses and are cared for the same way on farmsteads.

Ahmet Kurt on Unsplash.

Other Parts:

For Great Kettering. 1 / 2 / 3 / 4

For Solistal. 1 / 2 / 3 / 4

For Kamikita. 1 / 2 / 3 / 4

For Birkina. 1 / 2 / 3 / 4

[zarekthelordofthefries]

I'm thinking (as I often do) about the manner in which to potentially build a D&D-style elfgame-type campaign setting for fantasy adventure games that is also built on a foundation of realism and verisimilitude. Specifically, because I'm me, I'm thinking about speculative evolution. It's hardly an elfgame setting without, y'know, elves, but also other fantastic creatures like dragons and mimics and What If A Spider Was Large.

At the moment I'm particularly focused on the interrelation between real-world creatures and fantastical creatures. It's one thing to speculatively-evolve a biosphere that produces unicorns, it's another for that biosphere to ALSO include horses. In trying to be realistic, how do you have animals with real-life established evolutionary histories, including humans, existing alongside mythic beafts?

I think there's several ways one could handle it, but I feel like the ones that are most conducive to elfgaming environment are just two:

1: Earth Evolution But A Little To The Left. This world isn't Earth, but it has an extremely similar biohistory with some added weirdness. Recognizable real-world clades evolve alongside dragons and giants and sea monsters, which all have their own place in the cladogram. If you're feeling pulpy, maybe some non-avian dinosaurs didn't go extinct. Humans evolved like they did on Earth but have various relatives that are still alive, i.e. elves and dwarves and orcs and such, taking the place of Neanderthals or Homo floriensis but minus the whole going-extinct thing. Maybe also some other clades evolved bipedalism and intelligence, so that you can have your lizardfolk and catfolk and elephantfolk.

2: We're The Alien Invasion. Earth-life is foreign to the fantastical world. Our Earth exists in this setting and humans come from it, along with a bunch of other animals that you Need to have in fantasy stories like horses and bears and lupines, but the main setting is a world of elves and dragons and displacer beasts. Elves, orcs, dwarves, et al are similar to humans only because of convergent evolution, not because they're taxonomically related. Imported bears compete with owlbears for their ecological niches.

There are other paths you can take (maybe the setting is basically Earth but magic turns humans and animals into mythical creatures, like in Shadowrun), but those two feel like the ones that could best facilitate a setting that fits into games like D&D and Pathfinder, in my opinion. Most existing campaign settings fall into Type 1 already I think, at least implicitly or whenever they care to touch on evolution.

I'm not sure which I prefer. They're both valid, but they have their own pros and cons. Type 1 allows you to play with more extinct animals than Type 2, and I'm always a sucker for when a wizard game has a dinosaur in it. Type 2 gives you much more room to play in the speculative evolution space, since you don't have to worry about messing up the balance of an existing biosphere. Type 1 allows for half-human hybrids with less need for justification. Type 2 requires you to be more creative about what "counts" as an elf or dwarf if they have to be aliens. Type 2 makes it a bit easier to justify the existence of six-limbed vertebrates like dragons, pegasi, or centaurs.

I don't have a conclusion or anything to this, I just think it's interesting to think about.

[heckyeahponyscans]

Thoughts on MLP Make Your Mark Ch.4, Ep. 6 "A Little Horse"

Summary: When Pipp gets sick with a sore throat, her friends try to help her, with varying degrees of success. Meanwhile, Opaline decides it's time to put her plan into action.

The funny thing about this episode is it doesn't have much of a plot (most of it is just Pipp's friends trying to make her feel better), and yet I really enjoyed it. Like, Sunny's quest to find a soup recipe from Queen Haven didn't really move the plot forward, but Queen Haven is so melodramatic and funny that I'm never going to complain about her getting screentime, you know?

The humor really hit the mark in this one, too. Deadpan lines which are moved on from quickly. (My favorite gags were Pipp saying "I actually haven't been alone yet" and Hitch refraining from translating the tirade of the seagull playwrite.)

Also, we got a flashback to baby Pipp!

The sisterly vibe was strong between Pipp and Zipp in this episode, from Zipp revealing that she was only watching Pipp's livestream due to the collab with Electric Blue to her reminiscing about sticking a candy apple in Pipp's mane. But we also got to see the softer side of sisterhood with Zipp constantly checking in on Pipp.

. . . and bringing Pipp every single volume of the Adventures of Chevalia. Love that Zipp is a fantasy book nerd, she's just like me fr.

This is the cover of one of the Chevalia books, featuring a pony with similar colors to Celestia, except it appears to be a pegasus.

Along with Pipp's other visitors is Misty! Who the gang haven't seen since the Manesquerade Ball. So we can infer that Opaline has been keeping her close to the castle.

As early as "Traditional Unicorn Sleepover" Misty has liked hanging out with the Mane 5 because they're kind to her and expose her to wonders like chocolate-covered popcorn (excuse me, "ponycorn"). But this shows how much she's grown into these friendships, that it's not one-sided and Misty also cares about the other ponies' well-being.

Misty also brought a present wrapped in newspaper: a mane brush. Presumably her only mane brush. Misty, you are so sweet.

Also her expression when Pipp thanks her is very cute.

I loved Zipp's conspiracy board montage!

And Sunny and Twilight are SO cute in these drawings, awww!

Anyway, Zipp has correctly deduced that an alicorn is the evil pony Twilight Sparkle was talking about. The book from "Manesquerade" told her that alicorns can harness magic other than their own, namely dragon magic.

When Misty rushes back to report this, we see a room in "the lair" that we've never seen before, which looks significantly nicer than Misty's bedroom. Probably either a library or Opaline's room. Opaline declares it's finally time to put their plan into action.

Other random thoughts:

it must be hell texting with hooves

Pipp's webcam looks like a bunny, very cute

During the critter play Pipp mentions Breezies, the tiny ponies seen in G3 and G4.

This board game was already obviously a Monopoly reference (with the top hat) but now it also has the weird shoe!

Previously I noted that Opaline always talks about "our" plans to Misty, which is unusual for a villain. (It's most often the opposite, with the villain's sidekick being like "And then we'll rule the world!" and then the villain snarls at them and the sidekick hastily says, "I mean YOU will rule the world!")

In this episode Opaline says "We must act!" and Misty pushes back with "You mean I must act?" This made me view Opaline's words in a new light . . . That maybe the "we" isn't about feeling solidarity with Misty, but more about tricking Misty into buying into Opaline's plans by feeling like she has a stake in them.

But on a subconscious level, because Opaline is more of a bulldozer than a subtle puppetmaster.

The episode ends with Opaline's sinister laugh; she doesn't notice Misty isn't joining in.

[ginnyzero]

Well, I’m just... utterly baffled. I’m working on another script for Youtube and ran across this Magic Unicorn horse caring game on Google play and it’s 100% game designs from Star Shine Legacy? I mean, it’s extremely blatant rip offs of Star Shine and Tin Cane and Concorde here. Just wow. Wow Babyloft games, Wow.

I know this is 2 years old. I’m out of the loop. I don’t play games from google play. There looks to be an older version or something by Kiddogames too on another site with different graphic styles for the rider and horse. And the rider looks like Alex.

[howaboutsomeschmolly]

Favourite headcanons pt. 2

Schmendrick being bi and not shy about it. One of his biggest heartbreaks was caused by another wizard he fell head over heels for. Said wizard was emotionally manipulative and made game of Schmendrick’s efforts to become a real magician, constantly reminding him how he could have chosen a more fitting companion for himself instead of Schmendrick. Took Schmendrick a while to recognize the pattern of abusive behaviour, not wanting to admit to himself that his partner did not respect him as a person. The last straw: when Schmendrick was asked to pretend to not know him while at a gathering of wizards, so he would “have not embarrassed him”.

Lìr being secretly aware that Haggard would not have kept close anything that did not make him happy and this, deep down, makes him hope that Haggard cares at least a little about his adopted son. Too bad Haggard hasn’t gotten rid of him simply because he is curious to see if Lìr is really the one who is going to take down his castle, according to the prophecy.  

Up to the moment he had reached for his full power, Schmendrick had carried a pouch of gunpowder around his neck. What for? To quickly blow up in the unfortunate case he would have been sentenced to the stake for sorcery in unwelcoming regions and cities while he was still powerless and unable to free himself by magic, instead of slowly burning.  

 Mabruk being the one who had taught Haggard how to “train” the Red Bull to do what he wants. He knows about the unicorns being kept captive into the sea but doesn’t lift a finger. When he is let go, he does not talk out of pure spite.

Schmendrick being mildly claustrophobic due to have been sealed in a barrel by other apprentices for almost an entire day and dared to get out of it, in a mockery of his skills and of him coming from a family of coopers. Nothing paralyzing, but he would start to be very uncomfortable and fidgety in constrictive spaces.

Molly and Cully first met while he was trying to steal hens from her family’s chicken coop and she threatened to beat him up with a log, scaring him away. They started to regularly meet at dusk since then, before they eloped after Molly had become known as “the bandit’s wife” around her small village and everyone was afraid to talk to her in fear of repercussions.

Lìr has almost gotten engaged to the princess in distress sent to him by Schmendrick at the end of the book – feeling it was his “duty” to. She was the one to realize they could never be happy together because he was in love with someone else. She becomes a great friend and a loyal counsellor, one of the few with whom Lìr feels comfortable to confide. When she dies after a horse ride incident, Lìr’s mind begins to go adrift.

Schmendrick and Molly never using pet names between them and very seldom saying they love each other out loud. When they do, it means that the situation is god-awful. Lìr knows that when Schmendrick calls Molly “beloved” it is time to seriously worry.

Sometimes Molly feels the need to be alone for a while. She had been surrounded by people all her life and rarely had the opportunity to go on her own adventures. Every now and then she would announce Schmendrick that she would leave for - dunno, a couple of weeks or a month? - and he would just be like “’kay bye, travel safe and please let me know when you are coming back. Have fun!” because they both trust each other so much.

[wolfoftheend]

Big Jack Horner is just Handsome Jack without a reason to be evil, no no, hear me out, here are the similarities between them. Warning, some spoilers ahead, very little but they are still there.

1. Both were funny.

2. Both were unapologetically evil.

3. Both owned high profile corporations and are immensely wealthy.

4. Both wanted to take control of an extremely powerful thing within the world.

5. Both hired mercenaries which ultimately were the cause of their downfall.

6. Both didn't believe they really deserved their defeat.

7. Both nearly got what they wanted and then lost it at the very end, they were about to win, then lost.

8. Both kinda had a good life before they went evil.

9. Both used any means necessary to get what they wanted to achieve their goals.

10. Death is what got them in the end.

11. Both sacrificed everything to get to the end and again, it's what killed em.

12. Both are a case of enjoyable villainy.

13. Both actually had fucking personality to them other than the 98% of other villains in media and gaming.

14. Heehoo pettiness go brrrrr. (Both were incredibly petty.)

15. Everything was personal to them.

16. Both owned unicorns... Sort of..... (Handsome Jack actually took care of his, Butt Stallion supremacy. Spoilers right here for 'Puss In Boots: Last Wish':Jack Horner cut the horns off of his, the horses driving the carriage of the baker's dozen are actually unicorns with their horns filed off. Look closely at that scene.)

17. Both were incredibly childish. (Refer to 15, 14, and 6.)

18. Both are called Jack.

19. Both are narcissistic as hell. (Refer to some other points)

20. Both are people who you never wanna piss off. (Refer, again, to 15 and 14. Handsome Jack make sure your head is on a stick or a silver platter, scoop something out your eyeballs with a spoon, or will show you the difference between strangling and choking. Jack Horner will also make sure your head is his, or use one of his magical items to "teach you a lesson")

21. How they both talk.

22. Both have not a single further care for another's life and just want more and more money and more and more power. (Well Handsome Jack cared about Angel, and his body doubles but not nearly enough his body doubles to trust them with certain shit.)

23. Both final battle arena's looked fucking sick.

That is all I can say ATM.

[exchangestudentmicha]

Demon Headcannons for the Brothers

AKA I can’t name shit and I am a monster fucker

Also to the person who commented that my last headcannons post was for monster fuckers, this entire blog is for monster fuckers lol

Lucifer

When he’s in his demon form you may notice him puff up and shake his wings a bit, he says its to stretch his wings, but if you pay attention he doesn’t seem to do it around anyone else

He has some big ass talons that he can bring out at will, and holy shit are they SHARP. Like, you know how when a knife is sharp enough it can cut through things like cardboard with little to no effort? Yeah, they’re that sharp

His wings are exceptionally soft and have a beautiful sheen to them, he takes good care of them after all. (That is when his wings aren’t molting)

Yes, he molts. And he hates it. His wings look scruffy and they get pretty itchy, not to mention his feathers get EVERYWHERE. Like they will pop up all around the House of Lamentation for about 3 months after he’s done molting

Mammon

He doesn’t just steal actual valuables, he steals any shiny things that he likes. You’ve actually found a box full of random shiny objects in his room before. Some of them are from his crow familiars, some are just from him finding/stealing them

You’ve seen him on multiple occasions, hopping in the hallways like a crow. It usually only happens when he’s excited though

His wings are very soft, not as soft as Lucifer’s or Asmo’s, but still very soft. And he loves to wrap you in them, even if he doesn’t admit it. He will take any chance that he can find to do it.

Think I’m joking? Spend the night in his room once. If you wake up before him you’ll find that his wing is draped over you like a blanket. And if he isn’t in one of his tsundere moods, you may find him wrapping you up in his wings when he hugs you. (This boi loves you so damn much just hug him)

Levi

He does the snake tongue thing when in his demon form, and yes, he adamantly denies that he does, but you’ve seen him do it multiple times

Speaking of snake stuff though, yes, he can unhinge his jaw. He did it once to eat a taco in the middle of a raid that he was playing through with some of his friends. You still can’t decide if it was horrifying or awesome (or for my monster fuckers like me out there, arousing)

He has venom that he can control whether to inject it or not, its a mix between a neurotoxin and a hemotoxin. So when you’re injected with it your blood starts clotting as you suffocate to death from your muscles not working

Levi does shed his skin every now and then, and he HATES it since he’s usually confined to his tank for a couple days to help him shed and his skin gets all tight and itchy before it happens

Satan

Has hissed at Lucifer at least once in front of you

He doesn’t really show off many horse traits (or more unicorn traits) for his symbolic animal being a unicorn, instead he just acts like a cat

Like, fully a cat.

The only person that he constantly likes affection from is you, with his brothers, depends on the hour, just like a cat. Also, you could’ve sword you’ve seen him cleaning himself with his tongue before, he denies it whenever you ask however

Also, he can breathe green fire. He doesn’t do it much however. It only really happens when he’s exceptionally angry. Like Lucifer did something to piss him off, Mammon stole a magic tome of his that’s from like 1000 year ago and is now irreplaceable, and Levi is playing his video games so he can’t download Ebooks all in the same day angry. Its pretty hard to get him that angry, but when he does you’ll see green fire come from his nose (and see him destroy the House of Lamentation) Its one of the few times that not even Lucifer will confront him

Asmo

He glows under UV light in his demon form, just like scorpions. Y’all found out when you found a video of a person finding scorpions with a blacklight and tried it on Asmo. He now shows it off at any party he goes to

He does actually have a scorpion tail, he just doesn’t bring it out much though.

He does have venom he can use with his scorpion tail, its a mix between a neurotoxin that paralyzes you and an extremely powerful aphrodisiac

In fact, his venom is used in a popular aphrodisiac sold on Akuzon, just with the neurotoxin removed

His charm is ridiculously strong, like, he can probably get nearly anyone to do whatever he wanted, but funnily enough he doesn’t usually use it that much for nefarious means. In fact, usually the worst that he does with it is help his brothers with pranks. He doesn’t see a point in using it to get the people he wants, his looks and natural charisma usually work just as well for that stuff.

Beel

Dude has tried eating at least one of everything in the Devildom, and I don’t just mean food. Remember the pillar incident? Or the Little Ds in Levi’s game? Yeah those are nowhere near the oddest things he’s shoved into his mouth. There’s a reason why Asmo doesn’t buy fruit scented products after all

He does actually have a tail with a stinger on it, its just usually retracted so you don’t see it since its hidden under his jacket

Just like his buggy and snek brothers he has venom as well. It’s technically not as bad as his brother’s venom since it won’t directly kill you, but since it causes pure, agonizing pain, its still not fun at all. But thankfully, just like Levi, he can decide whether to inject it or not. Which is good since his stinger also doubles as an ovipositor

His tongue is really long, like it can extend up to a foot long and is actually a bit rough, do what you please with this information, I know I will ;)

Belphie

His eyes glow in the dark. And you didn’t know until you woke up in the middle of the night and saw a pair of glowing magenta eyes staring at you

He can actually float through using his magic, in fact, he sometimes does it in his sleep, and yes that means you’ve walked into his room and seen him sleeping on the ceiling. He just usually doesn’t float because he’s too lazy

Beel’s and Belphie’s link is honestly kinda crazy. Usually its pretty tame, but sometimes it can border on freaky. They can usually have a rough guess on what the other is feeling, they can feel if something is wrong with the other, and you swear, they always seem to sneeze at the same time.

Just like his brother (and just like a cow tbh) his tongue is also kinda rough, but nowhere near as long as Beel’s

[mimmixereblogs]

Ranting time ! The Bella Sara adventures

Guys, I've just been struck by a flash of nostalgia when I remembered how focused I was on Bella Sara when I was little.

[For those who don't know what the heck that is, it mainly was a collecting cards game (kinda like Pokémon, but less popular and just for the sake of collecting pretty horses drawings) featuring magical horses and scattered lore here and there in special descriptive cards. It also featured a website, and diverse merch as book expending the universe and your usual figurine/dolls sets]

In France, when I started getting into it (compulsively asking my parents to buy me cards and redeeming the codes on the dedicated website), it was already dying — no one else that I knew had ever heard even remotely of it ; it was around 2012-2015 I believe

All the news on the website were at least three years old and the maintenance of said website was getting messier by the days — I've even learnt recently by desperately trying to search for it again that it has definitely been shut down (even though I was able to get back to it -in a rather buggy state- only a year and a half prior, around 2020)

When I think about it now, it holds such a strong feeling of nostalgia, to an almost idealised point ; I remember the open world game where you could buy seeds and plant flowers in the dedicated little dirt or water or sand squares to heal the big tree of life (or smth, I don't really remember the name) the more you did so

You could personalise your character with hairstyle and clothes you gained or bought, and could change their colors with dyes you could also make or buy

And the quests given by horses who would give you cards when you gave them what they asked for! The Wildscape castle that I thought would be an entire new zone to explore but turned out to be a model to use as decoration for your farm. And the gigantic plant leading you in the sky (Jack and the beanstalk way) to a cloud area where there were bovos (floating cows) who could gave you strawberry or chocolate or regular milk

So much undiscovered secrets lied in every corner of it, deep in the dark forest with giant spiders, following the path leading to a cave where there were a witch standing close to her cauldron ... we could apparently put items in it, but I've never found out what

And that's only the open world— all the mini games scattered around the website!! How you could take care of a foal, and design rooms with objects you would gain by entering their card's code— the mahjong firework mini game! The pearl searching/fish gathering underwater mini game ! The one where you could draw an adventure for a 2D paper horse (this one was very glitchy but by far my favourite, I was trying so hard to make it work lmao)!

And, very importantly, the fact that you could take care of all the horses you had collected in cards — I always loved how water horses, pegasus and regular horses/unicorns had each their own type of stables

There are a lot of things I haven't even mentioned, and some of them which I barely remember — this is such a great part of my childhood which I've never had the opportunity to truly share with anyone on whom it had had the same impact, since I started going to social media places only a few years later

SO, if you too had a great time with the Bella Sara website, or the cards or the books in general, hit me up! I'd be more than glad to discuss it with you :D

[fantasy-fields-bitty-center]

UnderTale Gaster Unicorn

Name: Appa

Species: Appaloosa horse

Size: 1.2 - 3.3 feet tall(fullsize) 5 - 7 inches tall(mini) 7 - 10 feet tall(bara)

Personality: Curious, affectionate, caring,

Likes: Cuddles, playing with others, the outdoors, games, learning, reading,

Dislikes: Being alone, being ignored, being inside for to long, aggressive/rude/mean people/bitties, overly messy areas, excessive swearing, small spaces, to much stuff,

Compatibility: Appas do best in mid sized and tightly knit households, preferring tighter bonds than other Unicorns!

Appas prefer more modern or minimalistic houses, they dislike all the clutter and it makes their mind more cluttered as well!

They like to read and letting them have an area to read(for the fullsize and bara) is a good idea(minis with have that area in their bed box),

Frozen(and then cooked ofc) foods will make Appas sick! we are usure why but its best to get their foods from a local garden(they would love to help if you decided to have one yourself!) or from the fresh produce section! Dehydrated fruits are also a good snack for them!

Feeding habits: Unicorns are mainly herbivores, they like homecooked foods!

Additional info: Unicorn bitties are magic and can levitate items easily, even other bitties/people,

Their magic can has a calming or soothing affect,

Zone: Plains, Savanna,

In Universe: They are seen as very good bitties say for the fact they can't eat frozen food,

Difficulty: Basic

Features:

Main colors: Brown, gray, tan, black, white,

Secondary colors: Brown, gray, tan, black, white,

Extra: N/A

Additional info: Solid or piebald patterns,

[bloededhoine]

world building cause twn doesn't part 4: elves!

everyone loves elves! they're a fantasy genre mainstay, archery is so sexy, and they have those E A R S. plus, they play a pretty important part in the witcher universe!

series masterpost

colour code cause i fucking love colour codes - already happened/introduced, probably s2, important background info, stuff that might be in the prequel, extras

background

i'd recommend going through the last parts, or at least the tl;dr's first

elves arrived on the continent about 2000 years before humans, and are divided into 5 distinct cultures of varying importance: aen undod, aen elle, aen seidhe, black seidhe, and aen woedde

elves only came to the continent in one group, but not all of that group stayed. the different branches based on where they settled make up the different cultures

the main two languages in the witcher are common speech and elder speech (aka hen llinge), the former used by most humans and the latter used by the elder races

aen undod

the aen undod are the oldest elven culture, having existed years before the conjunction of spheres

their home world faced some huge catastrophe, so the aen undod left in search of new worlds, leaving their descendants to become all the future elven cultures.

the aen undod spoke the oldest dialect of elder speech, laith aen undod, or one speech

aen elle

the aen elle use a language derived from hen llinge called ellylon, in which their name means "of the alders"

they don't actually live on the continent, having abandoned it years ago for their own world.

however, when the aen elle arrived in this new world, it was already populated by humans and unicorns. unfortunately, these elves are notoriously ruthless and both the native species were eradicated.

the capital of the aen elle world is tir ná lia, and is described as stunningly beautiful, featuring open air buildings made of marble, alabaster, and malachite. here it is in the third witcher video game, by djkovrik on nexus. their screenshots are amazing btw.

[ID: screenshot from wild hunt showing tir ná lia. the city is built on cliffs above a sea, there are waterfalls falling from the cliffs and bridges connecting them. there are mountains in the background and the buildings are fairly small and out of focus, they seem to be in the gothic revival style with ornate windows and steeped roofs. end ID]

the ruler of the aen elle was auberon muircetach, king of the alders and aen saevherne (aen saevherne is the honorary title of an elven mage who has extensive knowledge of magic, geneology, history, and many other subjects). auberon was also ciri's 5 times great grandfather. this gwent card pretty much sums up his vibe: scary yet sexy.

[ID: illustration of elven man with long white hair on a brown horse. he has defined cheekbones and facial features and is wearing a gold crown and blue robes with a red sash, gold belt, and leather boots. he is holding a white unicorn head in one hand. the unicorn's horn is cut off, and is bloody around its neck and where its horn was. end ID]

auberon's consort was another aen elle named shiadhal, with whom he had one daughter, lara dorren. lara is so so so important for the witcher, as she is the beginning of the elder blood, or hen ichaer.

hen ichaer is a gene that carries incredibly powerful magic, and those who have it are usually sources. i talk more abt this in part 3.

for better or for worse, lara dorren fell in love with a human sorcerer, cregennan of lod, and left tir ná lia for him. auberon took this as cregennan "stealing" his daughter and therefore the hen ichaer, and developed a pretty hefty vengeance and dedication to "take back" what was his (yikes).

this also set a precedent of people "claiming" the lives of carriers of the hen ichaer

auberon also formed an elven cavalry known as the red riders or wild hunt (dearg ruadhri in ellylon) and he appointed eredin bréacc glas as their commander. the initial purpose of the wild hunt was to travel to different worlds and capture slaves for tir ná lia, although they later became auberon's tool to find and exploit carriers of hen ichaer.

the wild hunt also uses specially trained mages known as navigators to open portals to other worlds, the most notable of these navigators is caranthir ar-feiniel, who doubled as one of eredin's most trusted men.

the aen elle also live a pretty long time, average is around 650 years, so the timelines are kinda hard to keep track of.

notable aen elle include: auberon muircetach, shiadhal, lara dorren, eredin breácc glas, crevan espane aep caomhan macha (aka avallac'h, also an aen saevherne and lara dorren's ex), caranthir ar-feiniel (also avallac'h's foster son), ge'els (the viceroy of tir ná lia), and imlerith (general of the wild hunt)

aen seidhe

put simply, the aen seidhe are the elves that did not leave when the aen elle did

the aen seidhe don't really have a society like the aen elle, they're pretty dispersed across the world. but, there are certain areas the aen seidhe have claimed as their own.

one of these little civilizations is dol blathanna, also known as the valley of flowers. unfortunately, it's not an independent state, as it was conquered by aedirn in the 1150s. however, then-king baldwin thyssen did allow the elves to retain a lot of their cultural identity and live in peace.

dol blathanna includes the village posada and the capital silver towers, which is where filavandrel aén findháil is from. he's that sexy man right there

[ID: photo of white elf man with blonde hair going to his shoulders. he is wearing tattered green robes and is looking slightly to the side with his lips pursed. end ID]

not that anyone cares, but here's him in the hexer. it's not important to the lore or twn it's just fuckin funny

[ID: old man with white frizzy wig. he is wearing a headband that appears to be rocks on a string. he has what looks like a potato sack tied around his shoulders over a green tunic. he is scowling. end ID]

outside of dol blathanna, there aren't really any places where elves can live with minimal human interaction, although the blue mountains are home to a few incredibly powerful elves

side note: dol blathanna is technically part of the blue mountains, but is in the far southern foothills so they're usually treated as separate entities.

the blue mountains are also a natural border dividing the northern kingdoms from the far east, and where filavandrel went to live after he got fed up with dol blathanna.

they're also the home of ida emean aep sivney, who's also an aen saevherne and future member of the lodge of sorceresses.

next season, we're going to meet the beautiful elven sorceress francesca findabair, also known as enid an gleanna (hen llinge for daisy of the valley)

here she is with fringilla vigo (nilfgaardian sorceress) in twn season 2. note that enid is preggers! that's very odd and i will go into detail on it later

[ID: photo of two women walking side by side. the one on the left is black and has black hair in braids going over one shoulder. she is wearing a silver dress with a similarly coloured floor length coat. the one on the right is biracial and has strawberry blonde hair in a braided updo. she is wearing a floor length blue gown with gold embroidery and a metallic brown cloak. she is pregnant. end ID]

enid is crazy interesting and important for the story of the witcher (and confirmed for season two!), so i won't go too in depth about her now

as i mentioned in part 2, nilfgaard tends to favour elves, leading to a lot of militaristic forces allied with nilfgaard. most notably, the scoia'tael, or squirrels. the scoia'tael are an incredibly ruthless and effective nonhuman guerilla force, generally divided into commandos, units that patrol a given area and eliminate the northern (or simply human) threat.

there are a lot of scoia'tael, so i'll just give you the commanders for now: angus bri cri, coinneach dá reo, iorveth, isengrim faoiltiarna, riordain, and toruviel.

you might remember toruviel as this sexy angry lady from twn, and she is possibly going to get a much bigger role later... pay attention to toruviel.

[ID: young elf woman with white skin and red hair tied over her shoulder. she has a bloody nose and is wearing a light green top with a dark brown leather studded belt. her belt is also around an olive green coat. she looks quite angry. end ID]

the scoia'tael were very well organized, but also quite dispersed, so when nilfgaard needed more specific tasks done, they would assemble specific military units (usually led by some of our favourite squirrels)

the vrihedd brigade was the most important of these units. they were especially notorious for their cruelty in the second northern war, so i'm sure we'll meet at least a few members next season.

their leader was colonel isengrim faoiltiarna (aka the iron wolf), and his officers coinneach, iorveth, riordain, and angus.

francesca findabair is not directly involved with either the scoia'tael or the vrihedd brigade, but she does work quite closely with them very often.

also important to note that not all scoia'tael are aen seidhe elves, most (including all higher ranking commanders and officers) are, but there are a number of nonhumans including dwarves and halflings.

unfortunately, the aen seidhe are slowly going extinct, both from years of genocide from humans and their slow reproductive cycles (elves live a Long time, but can only have children towards the beginning of their lives)

that's why it's so surprising to me that enid is preggers! we don't exactly know her age, but by my calculations she was over 150 in twn (pretty far past the age elves can have children).

because of this, elves are pretty divided between fighting against human rule and seeking coexistence. there are arguments for both camps, mainly that humans are colonizers and should not be trusted for the former, and that elves are dying out already and need to live with humans to survive for the latter.

the most prominent stand for the fight was in the 1060s when an aen seidhe named aelireen led an uprising against humans. most of the elders told her that it wouldn't end well, but she didn't listen and led hundreds of young elves into battle. it was an utter massacre, and basically all elves who could have children died.

yikes

unfortunately, the movement for coexistence was just as unsuccessful. it was led by our man cregennan of lod, lara dorren's husband. the poor simp just wanted to live in peace with his wife, but a lot of humans thought he was a traitor because he married an elf, and he and lara were murdered in 1137 in redania.

the last real push for independence was with the formation of the scoia'tael in the 1260s. I say 1260s because the very beginnings of the scoia'tael were right around 1262-1236 (the start of ciri's timeline) but they became majorly important around 1267. although, even the scoia'tael realized they needed humans to survive and began working with nilfgaard.

however, some scoia'tael are less keen on being nilfgaard's attack dogs, leading to further division amongst the aen seidhe.

black seidhe

remember the elves i talked about in part 2 as being the ancestors of the albans? this is them!

the black seidhe are native to the south, more particularly the valley around the alba river. they are practically extinct, but the nilfgaardians carry a lot of their cultural identity in the nilfgaardian language, a variation of hen llinge.

aen woedde

the wood elves, or aen woedde, is the elven culture we know the least about, they primarily live in the areas around nilfgaardian forests and speak hen llinge.

the only notable wood elf is aenyeweddien, or iskra, a member of the rats, a gang of semi violent youths in the northern realms. we'll learn more about the rats in future seasons.

tl;dr: elves, especially the aen seidhe and aen elle cultures, make up a large part of witcher lore. they are most notable for their long lifespans, magical and historical knowledge, and militaristic alliances with nilfgaard.

[roachzrivia]

It's An Elf Thing

A series of events where the party (mainly Dorian) reacts to the Inquisitor doing weird things. Basically, if video game things actually happened. Supposed to be at least a little bit amusing.

Maybe it's just me who always forgets my horse and walks across the entire Hinterlands before remembering. Idk. I thought of this idea after jumping down a cliff and losing almost all my health because I couldn't be bothered to walk the long way round. Also, the trellis climbing at the winter palace makes zero sense, I'm sorry.How have I put 422 hours into this game? Where did my life go?

Gen, implied Dorian/Lavellan, brief implied Iron Bull/Dorian

Also on AO3 (link in my bio)

“Maker’s breath, can you slow down for a moment?” said Dorian, bending over to catch his breath. “It isn’t as if we’re short of time. Any normal person would allow for travelling time, you know.”

“I am allowing for travelling time,” Lavellan’s voice came floating back to him. “My pace just happens to be faster than yours.” But he slowed down, allowing time for Dorian to catch up.

“Couldn’t we have sent someone else on this task?” Dorian settled himself on the ground. It was damp, but he was tired enough not to care. “There have to be some perks that come with being the Inquisitor.”

“Aside from the castle, the army, and every noble in Thedas wanting to be my friend?” Lavellan sat down beside him, folding his long limbs gracefully beneath him.

“Aside from all that,” said Dorian, waving his hand dismissively.

“Nope, can’t think of anything,” said Lavellan, laughing. He leaped to his feet. “Come on, if we take a shortcut, we can make it by nightfall.” He held out a hand to Dorian, who grasped it and allowed himself to be pulled to his feet.

“Shortcut? There isn’t a shortcut around here,” he said, as he watched Lavellan disappear over the edge of the cliff. “Wait!” He ran over to the edge, heart pounding as he scanned the ground below, hoping desperately not to see Lavellan’s broken body on the ground.

“Ow!”

“Oh, thank the Maker,” muttered Dorian, as he watched Lavellan skid down the side of the mountain, rocks and dirt kicking loose as he went.

“Come on!” Lavellan sprang to his feet. Even from a distance, Dorian could see the cuts and scrapes from the tumble.

“I think I’ll pass on the shortcut,” he said, as he headed along the edge of the cliff, searching for a proper path down.

“Oh, for the love of…” Dorian watched as Lavellan tumbled down yet another cliff, feet sliding on the rocky ground, pebbles and dirt shifting beneath his feet. He took a tumble, somersaulting head over heels, his head bouncing off a rock. He collapsed at the foot of the cliff, body limp and bleeding. “You are going to be the death of me,” muttered Dorian. “You brought this upon yourself. You don’t deserve my magic.” He sighed. “But if I leave you here, Cassandra will probably convince everyone that I pushed you. Very well.” He brandished his staff, reached for the magic, and raised Lavellan back to consciousness with a blaze of green light. “Please,” he called out, as he began to tentatively pick his way down the mountainside. “No more shortcuts.”

Lavellan was already racing away from him, grabbing handfuls of elfroot as he went.

-

“We’ve been walking for absolutely ages,” Sera whined, as she dragged her feet along the path, kicking stones at Lavellan. “When do we get to shoot something? I signed up for more shooting, less walking walking walking!”

The party had been walking for hours. The weather was hot, the road dusty, and no one was feeling particularly cheerful.

“I can’t help feeling as if I’ve forgotten something,” Lavellan mumbled under his breath, chewing on his lip as he gazed around at the small group. “Got my daggers.” He patted the sheaths strapped to his hips, just to make sure. “I’m fully dressed…” He scanned the group. “You’re all fully dressed. Sera has her bow. Dorian has his staff. Bull has… whatever that is,” he said, gesturing at the massive axe strapped to the qunari’s back.

“If I may interject,” said Dorian. “I take umbrage at the comment that we are all fully dressed. What Bull is wearing hardly counts.”

Bull grinned at him. “Would you really have it any other way?”

“I would, actually.”

“Hush, both of you. I’m thinking.”

“Do you perhaps think,” Dorian said carefully, “that you’ve forgotten the horses?”

“What?”

“The horses. You know, the beasts of burden which we spent an awful lot of time and effort securing for the Inquisition, which are, right at this very moment, standing ready for us back at the base camp, half a day’s walk behind us.”

“You mean we could have been riding this whole time?” exclaimed Sera.

“Fuck,” said Lavellan softly, looking back the way they had come. “Horses. I knew I had forgotten something.”

-

“Are we done here?” Dorian watched as Lavellan waded into the lake. The water reached up to his thighs, and whilst Dorian had to admit that the elf did look rather striking in a rustic sort of way, he had been watching this activity for long enough that he was beginning to feel bored. “I would rather we reached camp before nightfall,” he called out.

Lavellan raised a hand in response, and then returned to bending low over the water. He reached down, plucking yet another handful of blood lotus from the water.

Dorian sighed and waited for the Inquisitor to finish.

Finally, Lavellan walked out of the lake, his soaking wet breeches clinging to his legs.

“Ready to go?” Dorian looked pointedly up at the sky, and the sun sinking low.

“Just need to grab a few more herbs,” said Lavellan, darting away to grab at a nearby stalk of elfroot. “And did you bring the pickaxe? There’s an outcropping of obsidian that’s calling my name.”

“Surely the Inquisition could spare someone other than the Inquisitor for this job,” muttered Dorian, as he followed after Lavellan.

-

The party arrived back at camp in good time. The Storm Coast had been wet and grey, as usual, but the rain had finally eased, and everyone was looking forward to a warm meal before crawling into their bedrolls for the night.

“Just a moment,” said Lavellan, stopping in front of the requisitions officer. “Just got a few bits and pieces I picked up enroute that I figured might help the cause.”

“Thank you, sir. Every little bit will help out men in the field.”

Lavellan began opening his pockets. First, out came handfuls of herbs, which he handed directly to the officer. She took them, her arms quickly overflowing as Lavellan laid more and more picked plants into her arms.

“Is this why you fell so far behind us?” Dorian asked, raising an eyebrow. “Planning on quitting being the Inquisitor and becoming a gardener instead?”

“Everyone needs a hobby,” said Lavellan, pulling off his boot and tupping the contents out onto the requisition table. A handful of gemstones tumbled onto the table.

“Now that surely can’t have been comfortable.”

The requisitions officer watched on, eyes wide, as Lavellan opened his coat to reveal reams of fabrics tucked up in his belt and braces.

“For the boats,” he explained, as he laid them on the table.

“And here I thought you had just been eating more than your share at mealtimes,” Dorian quipped.

“Thank you-” began the officer.

“And the metal,” Lavellan said, turning to his horse to empty the saddle bags.

“By Andraste’s sweet arse, how did you manage to carry all of that without collapsing?” asked Dorian.

Lavellan just grinned and continued loading resources onto the requisitions table.

-

“So, the plan is to be as inconspicuous as possible?” asked Dorian.

“That is correct,” said Cassandra.

“To infiltrate the palace without any of the numerous political functions noticing us, and without disturbing the other guests?”

“Yes…” said Cassandra slowly.

“That what in Andraste’s name is the Inquisitor doing?” Dorian jerked his head at the scene behind him. Cassandra’s eyes widened.

“Inquisitor…?”

Dressed in all his finery, and in front of hundreds of guests, Lavellan was scaling the trellis up the side of the palace wall. People were pointing and tittering behind their hands.

“Might want to rethink that plan, Cassandra,” said Dorian, smirking as he watched Lavellan climb up and over the top, disappearing into the depths of the palace.

Later, when Lavellan reappeared, Dorian pulled him to one side.

“I have to ask,” he said. “All of this climbing. Is it another elf thing?”

“An elf thing?”

“You know, because of living out in nature, with all of those… trees.”

Lavellan laughed. “Dorian, darling, not everything I do is an ‘elf’ thing. Sometimes, it’s just a ‘me’ thing. Now, are you saving a dance for me?”

“Of course. If you don’t get yourself arrested or assassinated before the end of the night, it might even be the most scandalous event of the entire ball.”

-

“What is that?” The horror in Dorian’s voice was palpable.

“New horse,” said Lavellan, climbing up into the saddle. “There’s one for you as well.”

“I am not riding that monstrosity. I don’t know who told you it was a horse, but whoever it was has clearly been indulging in too much wine.”

“You’re scared!”

“I am not scared,” said Dorian, eyeing the creature with distaste. “There is a different between scared and sensible and I assure you, right now I am the latter.”

The creature stared back at him; its black, soulless eyes boring into him. It shook its head, and Dorian leapt back to avoid being impaled on the massive horn rising from its forehead.

“Come on,” said Lavellan, voice wheedling.

“Can’t I just ride a normal horse?”

“But we need to match.”

Dorian looked at the second beast, the one which he was expected to ride. It was so thin that its ribcage was visible beneath its black fur.

“I would rather walk.”

“All the way to Crestwood? It’s only a bog unicorn, Dorian.”

“You are an infuriating man,” said Dorian, scowling. “Very well. But next time, please can we use the Fereldan horses? They don’t smell as bad.”

[thecagedsong]

Forgotten Light: Chapter 2: Taken

A/N: remember how I said this was beta? I realized that chapter 2 should have started halfway through chapter 1, before switching to Seth’s perspective. So there will be a bit of repeat with new content at the end, and i’ll post chapter 3 right after this. 

1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7 / 8 / 9 / 10 / 11

Chapter 2: 

           The last hope that being fairy kind might protect Kendra from the curse evaporated when she turned to look at him with blank eyes.

For once, he was smarter than his sister, and it absolutely sucked. Kendra’s eyes flickered over his shoulder, and he lunged forward, pulling Kendra to the side with him.

“Hey,” Kendra protested. He ignored her in favor of glaring at Ronodin.

“Oh, this is interesting, when I got the update, I was sure you were going to turn the key, Seth,” the dark unicorn said. “But you had Kendra do it instead. Couldn’t bear it yourself so you let your sister take the fall?”

“She volunteered, you know how the magic works,” Seth glared, “Stay away from us.”

Ronodin glanced behind him, “We don’t have much time. Celebrant is coming. We need to get into that room.”

“What’s going on?” Kendra demanded in her bossiest voice, pushing him out of her personal space. Of all the things that had to stick around, it was that tone. He was never going to admit he was glad to hear it.

Ronodin spoke before he could. “Careful with the glove. What’s going on is that that we have a dangerous dragon hunting us and our only chance is to get the Wizenstone before he does.”

“Oh sure, because trusting the dark unicorn is so much better,” Seth said. “We can handle this without you.”

“You’re a unicorn?” Kendra asked, “You don’t look like one.”

“Dragons can take human form, and so can unicorns,” Ronodin explained, “Seth, we have no time. Kendra might have been able to figure this out with her memories, but don’t pretend to be any kind of riddle master without her.”

He seemed sincere, but so did everyone else that ever stabbed him in the back. Ronodin wasn’t wrong that riddles weren’t his strong suit.

“When I get the wizenstone, I’m going to have fun unmaking you,” Seth decided. He turned and pushed the door open, “Kendra, I’m your brother. He’s Ronodin, our sworn enemy. Don’t trust him. I don’t have time to explain —”

There was the sound of marching and Celebrant’s gold army arrived at the top of the staircase. The three of them rushed into the room, closing the door behind them.

It was dark, except a couple of magic orbs here and there. Most of the light came from the shining stone on a short table in the center of the room. White and glowing, it reminded him a little of the Occulus, but instead of being completely smooth and round, it had a bunch of sides that cast little rainbows. The polygon to make all other polygons jealous.

“That’s the wizenstone?” he said.

“It’s gorgeous!” Kendra said.

“Wait until you see what I can get you,” Ronodin said, making no sense. Seth was looking over the room. There had to be something, some trick. After the whole game, the prize just sitting in the middle of the room was too easy.

Indiana Jones style? Nothing happened until you removed the wizenstone, then the room came crashing down on you unless you figured out how to use it real fast?

“And we can’t lock the door from the inside,” Ronodin said behind him. “We have to hurry.”

“Who’s Celebrant?” Kendra asked.

“King of the dragons,” Seth replied, “Bad guy. Wants us dead almost as much as he wants the magic rock.”

“What Seth said, Love.”

Seth grimaced, but didn’t exactly have time to barf over Ronodin flirting with his sister. He’d explain everything after they kept the world from ending.

“You seeing anything, horse boy?” Seth asked.

“No, but Humbuggle is the greatest trickster in history. There has to be something.”

“What about you Kendra? Magic eyes see anything interesting?”

“Magic eyes?” Kendra asked. “It looks pretty?”

“Don’t worry Love, I’ll explain it later,” Ronodin said. “And she doesn’t have her abilities right now, the magic is still turned off.”

Seth glared at the unicorn, “Stop that. She hates you and loves your cousin.”

“Focus Seth,” Ronodin said, “He’s coming with the banishment rod, what’s in here to banish?”

“The table? The orbs?” Seth theorized.

“Such high stakes,” Ronodin said with relish, “All we can do is improvise. We’re so close to the action, and we can’t let him win. Probably not the orbs, the rod only works once, vanishing the table might have the desired effect.”

“Kendra said something about a demon guarding the stone, and the rod should be used on that,” Seth recalled.

“You know, it really sucks to have people talk about me like I’m not here,” Kendra said. “Unless you two are messing with me and I’m not really Kendra.”

The door opened and Celebrant walked in.

“Not a very impressive dragon,” Kendra said. When did she get such a mouth on her? Was she always this sassy?

Then again, she did literally tell this guy in dragon form to crawl back into his hole just a week ago.

“The sister forgot, interesting choice,” Celebrant said, baring his teeth in a way that was all predator. “But to more important things, none of you have attempted to claim the jewel?”

“Kendra was warned that the stone was guarded by a demon, hand over the banishment rod without turning anyone to metal, and I’ll give it a go,” Seth offered.

Something about that bugged him. Demons weren’t trolls, comfortable in their lairs forever, they only stayed in a single place when they were trapped, like Granulus and Nagi Luna. Humbuggle didn’t strike him as the kind to let a loose canon like a trapped demon mess around with his game.

“Ah yes, such little threats would scare you,” Celebrant said. His eyes landed on Ronodin, “What are you doing here?”

“Wouldn’t have missed it,” Ronodin promised, then shot Kendra a wink.

“Stop that!” Seth demanded.

“What matters is that we’re all here,” Ronodin said, “And the Wizenstone is right there.”

Celebrant narrowed his eyes, “I don’t trust you.”

“You probably shouldn’t.”

“Don’t try to stop me.”

“Hey, he’s the real threat here,” Ronodin said, pointing at Seth.

Celebrant shook his head, “None of you are threats. Thank you for opening the door and stepping aside.”

He took the rod off his shoulder and turned to Obregon, “Swear yourself to me once more.”

The dragon fell to one knee and started reciting an oath, while Seth desperately tried to think his way around this. He couldn’t overpower the dragons, none of his abilities seemed particularly useful, even if he had control over them. There was the demon.

Celebrant was satisfied and handed his servant the rod. Obregon accepted.

“Quickly now,” he rushed. Obregon strode to the stone, cautious for something to jump out and eat him. When nothing did, he reached out to take the wizenstone. The rock was big and clumsy, Seth might be able to snatch the rod while the dragon held onto it. Seth would use the rod to banish Obregon, then claim the wizenstone himself. It was a dumb plan, but it was his only plan.

Seth set into a ready-to-run position.

Obregon brushed the stone with his finger, then jerked away. He started to shake and cry out, then dissolved into little confetti pieces, armor and all. Only the banishment rod remained whole, clattering to the ground.

Kendra squeaked, backing hard into the wall. Ronodin seemed even more elated than before. Celebrant glared at the stone.

Seth was glad he had waited before charging forward. This wasn’t the opening scene of the Raiders of the Lost Arc, this was the ending.

“Your turn to try, Your Majesty?” Ronodin asked.

“Not yet,” Celebrant growled.

“I take it your golden minions can’t enter.”

“Only those possessed of themselves can enter this chamber,” Celebrant said, not looking away from the wizenstone.

Tregain burst through the door. “I’m not too late!” The prince’s eyes went immediately to the wizenstone, and he scrambled forward.

“Kendra,” Seth whispered, “touch Ronodin with the glove!”

Kendra glanced at the glove on her hand, while Ronodin glanced back to see what they were whispering about. Seth yanked her hand forward to press against his back. Kendra protested, the stone made confetti out of Tregain, the rod clattering to the ground once more, and nothing happened to Ronodin.

“Fascinating, the gloves don’t work in here,” the unicorn said, which drew Celebrant’s attention. Ronodin turned around covered Kendra’s gloved hand with his own, and gave her a smile.

Kendra blushed and shook everyone off her, edging around the room. “Look, until I know more, everyone just needs to stop touching me. Okay?”

“I don’t get it,” Seth said, “Is the demon the stone? I thought they were more…living. With faces.”

“Demons come in all shapes and sizes,” Ronodin said, “But a solitary pure crystal isn’t one of them. There’s an aura for those with eyes to see, the stone is absolutely the wizenstone.”

All shapes and sizes. Dwarves didn’t have the powers Humbuggle had, and as a whole were proud of their size. Humbuggle had shapeshifted into the man in the trial for the Key of Forgetting. Which meant there was no reason his real form had to be a dwarf.

Not Rumpelstiltskin, he was the Sphinx.  Riddle giver, and the final boss.

Seth dashed forward and grabbed the rod.

“Seth, are you sure?” Ronodin asked. Celebrant shushed him.

“All right Humbuggle, you can come out now!” Seth called walking to the other side of the room, away from the stone and the door. “I solved the riddle. Let me give you the answer! It’s really not fair that you only told stuff to Kendra, you know. She’s terrible at sharing important things, and then you made her loose her memory? Come right now, or I’m calling this spell unopenable. Magic can’t make something impossible!”

“Seth, you figured it out?” Ronodin asked, raising an eyebrow but staying put.

“Like I said,” Seth replied, “Kendra, who lost her memory, had all the answers. It’s impossible to solve it without her information, and impossible to solve before the door of forgetting. You can’t make an impossible prison, not even for this stone, or the magic falls apart. And I need to be able to tell you the answer.”

“Of course,” Celebrant said, eyes gleaming. “Little dwarf, come take the boy’s answer.” Celebrant walked forward, standing right beside the Wizenstone. That was unfortunate.

“For the record, you had plenty of shots, Kendra could have easily figured it out before forgetting everything,” Humbuggle said, appearing between Seth and the stone.

Seth slashed the rod down, but Humbuggle vanished before he finished shouting “Begone!”

The rod vibrated in his hand, pointing directly at the Wizenstone.

It disappeared like a coin in a magician’s hand.

“You fool!” Celebrant roared, marching towards him. Ronodin started laughing.

Humbuggle appeared again, between Seth and Celebrant, shaking his head, “Much, much closer than people have come in centuries. Just a tad too slow. And a bit too obvious.”

“Where’s the Wizenstone?” Celebrant demanded.

“Far away. Banished.” The demon waved a dismissive hand, “None of your business anymore. And if you feel bad, imagine how Tregain must feel. He’s been playing for thousands of years, and died right at the very end. Now that’s tragedy.”

“No one was ever meant to own the stone,” Ronodin said, grinning. Of course he would find this hilarious.

“I provided that hint in the poem,” Humbuggle said, “But Seth didn’t trust plain language and instead trusted the rushed words of his sister. If by some miracle he had banished me, I admit, my enchantments and connection to the stone would have been severed. It would have been his for the taking. Completely possible, and a totally fair use of magic.”

Ronodin shook his head, “Even you don’t own it. You just set up contests for others to try to win. Since it is in your custody though, you can use its magic for your games. Interesting way to be beat the dullness of immortality.”

“Enough out of you,” Humbuggle said. With a clap, the banishment rod was back in his hands. “Time for everyone to go home!”

“All your contests are rigged with the slimmest possibility of sending you away,” Ronodin insisted, “Sending the stone away is the most a contestant can actually accomplish.”

“No one likes a heckler,” Hubuggle grumbled. “Return!”

Ronodin vanished.

“Is it too much to hope you killed him?” Seth asked.

“As for you,” the demon said, eyes gleaming, “Better luck next time! Though don’t look so sad. Think about what you’ve managed to accomplish. The curse of Stormguard castle is over, Seth’s a hero, Kendra too, probably. Gloves have lost their power, though you can keep them as a little souvenir for playing. My added passages are undone. Those turned to metal are freed from their curse.”

Good, that would have been a lot of gravestone designing if his friends weren’t turned back to normal. Would the enchantment un-doing affect Knox in the quiet box? How long could Seth justify keeping him there? It’s probably still the safest place on this preserve.

“What about Jaleesa’s arm?” Celebrant asked.

Humbuggle shrugged, “She chose to break the rules knowing the consequences. I am all about action and consequence, it’s part of playing fair. The arm stays gone. Personal injuries are personal injuries.”

“Obregon?”

“He chose to claim the unclaimable. He and Tregain are dead and beyond the power of magic.”

One less dragon to try and gobble him up. How many did he have to kill before getting the title of dragon slayer?

“Kendra’s memory?” Seth asked, without much hope.

Humbuggle grinned, “She chose to lose her memory, knowing the outcome. A price has to be paid just to see the Wizenstone. Much less get as close as you did. Be happy the spell didn’t require both your memories.”

“As we’ve already said, all magic done can be undone,” Seth said, irritated, “How do I undo it?”

“Rules are rules,” Humbuggle sang.

“Those rules are crap. Just tell me the answer!”

Humbuggle shook his head, “You chose to send the wizenstone away. You terminated the contest with a draw. King and Queen are free. Life at Stormguard castle can move forward as it did before.” Humbuggle clapped, “Another parting gift, I’ll send you all home! I salute you, brave contestants. You truly surpassed expectations. You survived and ended the contest, and it’s ridiculous how few people are apparently able to do that.” Humbuggle raised the rod.

“Wait, we still have stuff to do here,” Seth said.

“You don’t really get a choice,” Humbuggle said, “Return!”

There was the quick sensation of being shaken before he landed with a thump on his bed back at Blackwell Keep.

Seth groaned. What a waste of time and energy! It wasn’t even possible to get in the first place, they should have just let the dragons go and kill themselves over it. All they got out of the experience was Kendra’s memory taken from her.

Kendra!

He jumped out of bed and rushed to the door, trying to remember the way to his sister’s room in the dark. He heard the faint sound of the undead, which meant he was back to being a shadow charmer.

Of course, the faint sounds of the undead were like a lower frequency pitch, only there because he knew what to look for, under the sounds of the festival night. He really hated festival nights. At least the barriers around the castle were up.

He made his way towards Kendra’s room down the hall. Going slowly, hands outstretched. There was the clanking sound of Mendigo running towards him.

“Mendio, stop,” Seth said, hoping to prevent a collision when he couldn’t see the puppet.

The puppet didn’t respond, and kept running towards him. This was different than Hugo’s free will, he wasn’t following Seth’s orders at all.

The clacking was charging towards him, and Seth flattened himself against the wall to avoid being run over. There was wind as Medigo brushed past, and a human arm.

“Mendigo!” Seth said, chasing after the puppet. They were heading for the front door, and Seth scrambled after them in the dark. “Someone help!” he yelled over the noise of the festival, “Mendigo is kidnapping Kendra!”

A dwarf and Brunwin the minotaur charged past him on the steps to the courtyard, and the three of them followed Mendigo and Kendra down into a door to a cellar. Seth was soaked immediately by the rain, but he couldn’t stop. He could see by the lightning, but that was almost worse, leaving him with blocks of vision missing as he stumbled over the courtyard flagstones.

In the cellar, Mendigo was weaving through rooms, Brunwin gaining on him, as the limberjack upended crates and barrels.

Seth had a brief moment of feeling like Mario as he jumped over obstacles, until finally Mendigo turned into a storeroom. There was a creaking sound, and Seth had just enough time to see the puppet vanish inside the barrel.

The barrel that had been stolen by a killer. They assumed the murderer had come from the barrel, but they had been looking at it all wrong.

Seth jumped into the barrel after her. But Brunwin snatched him out of the barrel before he landed, keeping him on this side.

 “Let them take me to Kendra!” he demanded, struggling against restraining hug. “Let me go! Let them take me to!”

  Tears ran down his face, and his struggles started to slow down as he got more and more tired. Seth tried to choke down the sobs so he could keep asking, keep demanding. He was the caretaker, he should be able to sit in a barrel if he wants. Then he was just crying, and the constriction turned into a real hug.  

           “Come on,” Brunwin said, “The ones who took your sister can’t take you as well, not now and not like this. Straighten your spine, young man. Come and explain what you know.”

           “But…” Seth choked out. “But…”

           “Kidnappers rarely kill, there will be another chance to rejoice in the blood of your enemies, retreat for now.”

           “Seth? What happened?” Grandpa Sorenson entered the storeroom, and Brunwin released Seth so he could hug his grandfather.

           “They-they got Kendra,” he said, wiping his eyes and nose on his sleeve.

           “Return upstairs,” Brunwin advised, “the boy wishes in his distress to be captured by his enemies as well.”

           Grandpa Sorenson nodded, and started leading Seth out of the cell.

           As Seth walked away, Kendra’s words before she lost her memory came back like a broken record.

           “I want you up front.”

           “Tell everyone I love them…I love you most of all.”

           “I don’t tell you enough, but I’m proud of you.”

           At least she wouldn’t remember what a let down he was.

[roughentumble]

geralt and roachie

@avrupasya​ asked for a fic/continuation of this post of mine, where modern au geralt’s roach is a stuffed animal. sortve told in, like, vignettes, i suppose?

[read on ao3 if you like!]

The one constant in Geralt's short, stressful life, is Roachie. The little brown stuffed horse, named after a fish with similarly colored eyes("I'm gonna' study animals when I'm big!" he proclaims to anyone who will listen, which isn't many, so he whispers it into his horse's mane instead) has been with him long enough that he has no memories without her in some peripheral corner-- clenched in his fist, sitting on his blanket, overflowing from a fit-to-bursting pocket of his shorts. She's been with him through two houses now. He likes to think that she was given to him the day he was born, that they'd never been separated, but he can hardly ask anyone for confirmation. It's just one of those certainties you hold in your heart as a child.

So of course, for his seventh birthday, a dog eats her.

(The kicker is that it isn't even his birthday. It's a government assigned day that may or may not be in the vicinity of the actual day of his birth. It's not like he was dropped off at the fire station with paperwork or anything. He is vaguely, sort of, aware of this, just enough that it feels like an extra kick while he's down.)

She is utterly and completely beyond repair. Her shape isn't even recognizable, and for all his inconsolable tears, she's gathered up and unceremoniously dumped in the trash.

He cries when he finds her, cries through dinner, cries late into the night, cries until he is informed by one of his caretakers through what seems to be a rather impressive headache that if he doesn't stop crying, he would be "given something to cry about," which...

He already had something to cry about. Hence the crying.

He chews on his fist, however, startled into silence by the shouting, and hiccups softly into his pillow. Even as he's left alone, in the dark, he can't settle-- the thought of Roach thrown away like garbage is one that just doesn't sit right with him. He waits until the house is silent, into the wee hours of the morning, then sneaks on silent feet to the kitchen. He rustles through the trash as quietly as he can, pulling out pieces of his old friend, now not simply in tatters but also covered in what was left of dinner.

He nearly loses it at the sight of her, destroyed and filthy. Tears well in his eyes, blurring the world around him, and he sniffles once, weakly, but he doesn't want to wake anyone, and who knows what they'd do if they found him rooting through the trash, so he steels his resolve. Stomps down on the urge to give into another round of crying fits.

The night air is cold against his hot, sticky face. It's refreshing, but he barely notices it as he shuffles into a far corner of the yard. He digs a shallow hole with his hands and reverently lays her body inside. He covers her back up, tamps the earth back down with his palms, and then sits back on his heels. He's a little too young to fully understand what goes on in a funeral-- he's never seen one before, after all-- but he's seen TV, and he knows you're supposed to say something nice, so he says something to the effect of "Roachie was the bestest friend, an' the prettiest horse, there ever was in the whole entire world," and then sits in silence for a few moments longer, sniffling in the cold night air.

He suddenly recalls headstones, and he doesn't have any rocks-- doesn't know how to carve words into one-- but he does see a stick nearby. He shoves it in the ground like a stake and looks over his work. About as good as any grave dug by a seven-year-old could hope to be. He stays there until the cold starts making the tip of his nose and the joints of his fingers hurt, and then he stumbles back inside and curls up in bed.

He's moved to a new house a week later.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

He starts skipping lunches. He goes to school hungry, and comes home hungrier, and devours his dinners in this new house voraciously.

Every penny that would be spent on school lunches gets shoved in his pocket, then consolidated and shoved in his sock drawer when he gets home. Once he's gotten a decently-sized pile, he gathers it all up in his tiny little fists, shoves it in his pockets, and walks all the way to the local thrift store.

He'd gotten it into his head, somehow, that Roach still existed. Some childish idea that'd popped into his head as a comfort, and that got ingrained in his mind as he repeated it to himself over and over at night. He'd seen the rags, of course, what'd become of her after the dog had had it's way, he knew she was buried in the dirt a state away... but the core "soul" of his Roachie, that'd been with him and loved him and cared for him, was out there, in some other brown stuffed horse, waiting to be found again.

He marches into the toy section in the back of the thrift store with the determination of a soldier on a rescue mission.

And at the bottom of the bin, underneath all the teddy bears and off-brand babydolls, is one single brown stuffed horse.

Logic would dictate a coincidence-- but to his little eyes it looks a lot like magic.

He snatches her up instantly and runs to the front of the store, lest anything come and rip her from his arms again. He has to stand on his tip-toes, but he pushes her up on the counter, then pushes over the pile of money and asks if it's enough. The old lady looks at his pile, then pushes her glasses down the bridge of her nose to get a better look at the tag on the horse's ear. She squints, then glances at his wide, desperate eyes. "Well!" She announces. "Would you look at that. That's the exact right amount. Must be fate." Then winks down at him.

He gasps loudly, eyes getting impossibly wider. Fate-- Roach really had been waiting for him! He reaches up and makes a grabbing motion with his hands. "Can, can I... can I hold her, then?"

"She's all yours." The woman says gently, and places it in his waiting arms.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Roach stays with him all the way to the doorstep of the Kaer Morhen Home for Wayward Boys. He's thirteen, and she has a few weak seams, a few patches where the fur's been worn away. She's heavily loved, and he hasn't spent a night without her since they were "reunited". He's worn as well-- tired of the constant cycle of new places, new "families".

A few months later, with no prospect of leaving in sight, he takes back his wish for someplace permanent.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

He rooms with a boy named Eskel, who is about the only bright spot in Kaer Morhen, as far as Geralt is concerned. He is only mildly mocking of a thirteen year old sleeping with a stuffed animal every night, and it's mostly companionable ribbing, so even though the thought of anyone mocking Roachie gets under his skin, he lets it go. Eskel is his friend, after all. Of course, though, because that's the way of the world, some older boys overhear Eskel's teasing.

He comes back to his and Eskel's room that night, expecting to find Roach under his pillow-- he's too old to carry her everywhere, now, so that's where she lives-- and instead she's strewn across his bed.

He's old enough, now, to know that it maybe looks a little ridiculous from the outside, but he's too upset to be self-conscious, and Eskel is nothing if not understanding as Geralt sobs into his shoulder that night, quiet except for the occasional little soothing noise as he strokes a hand up and down Geralt's trembling back.

It's unsalvageable, at least for their inexperienced hands. Neither of them is a seamstress. After lights out, Geralt sneaks out-- this time with Eskel in tow-- and creeps into the backyard. Just like last time, he silently digs a hole and places her inside. That's what you do with Roaches, after all-- you bury them, then you find her all over again. The idea of Roach not existing out there, somewhere, is inconceivable.

He curls up next to Eskel that night, and it isn't the same, and he doesn't quite sleep... but it helps.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

His first Roach had been about the side of a Beanie Baby, and had been a light, palomino sort of color. His second had been more the size of a Build-A-Bear, with slightly stiff limbs and brown fur so dark it was nearly black. The third time he finds Roach, she's a reddish sort of Bay, peeking out at him from behind a large Lego set on the thrift store shelf.

He'd already searched the bins three times and had come up empty-handed, not even a miscolored unicorn, or something else close-but-wrong to show for his efforts, and... there she is, sitting right there, like it's some sort of game. He gasps, and Eskel turns away from the slightly melted Barbies he'd been toying with at the sound. Geralt shoves the box aside and grabs at her, cradling her carefully in his hands. She's already a little on the worn side this time around-- one eye's a bit loose-- and she's right in the middle, size-wise, compared to her other two incarnations.

He loves her instantly.

It must show on his face, because Eskel laughs a little and throws an arm around his shoulders. "So, is this the fated horse, then?" He asks, teasing.

"Yeah," Geralt replies breathlessly, too excited to meet the teasing tone back, "I think so."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Lambert shows up when he's thirteen and they're both sixteen.

He's loud, and violent, and instantly hones in on Geralt's preternaturally graying hair and the shock of white growing out of the back of his head(poliosis, born from stress, though none of them know that term). He's inhumanly annoying, a real pain in the ass, and somehow, against all odds, Geralt and Eskel both instantly adore him.

Maybe it's the way he talks back to their "caregivers", or the way he sometimes gets into fights on smaller kids' behalf, who knows, but the three of them form a little clique fairly quickly. Lambert pretends it's begrudging, but it's not hard to see that it's mostly a front. He's a brat, through and through, but he's their brat.

Which is why he's even in their room-- they're all hanging out, Geralt flipping through a book and Eskel attempting to study, while Lambert fiddles with Roach. He turns her over in his hands, examines the spot where the loose eye had fallen off a year back, picks at one of her loose seams. "I just don't get it," he says, scrunching up his nose, "like. What does it do?" He asks.

"Be careful with her." Geralt says, flicking a glance over at Lambert before returning to his book. "And she doesn't do anything. She's a stuffed animal, she just sits there."

"Well, yeah, no duh." Lambert replies, rolling his eyes. "I'm not stupid." Eskel mumbles 'Could've fooled me,' from his own bed, and Lambert hisses back 'Watch it,' and kicks his leg as he snickers. "I mean, what do you do with it? Give it wots and wots of hugs and kissews?" He asks mockingly. He's holding her by the front legs, wiggling them up and down like some sort of dance and shoving her in Geralt's direction. He's about to tell Lambert to knock it off, trying to bat him out of the way to continue reading when, one of her legs just... pops off. There's a stunned moment where Lambert just stares at the two pieces in his hands.

A strangled noise works its way out of Geralt's throat, and he snatches Roach out of Lambert's hands.

"I-- I didn't mean..." He tries, looking between Geralt and Eskel helplessly, but the tears are already welling up as Geralt clutches her closer to his chest.

"Oh, shit," Eskel mutters and scrambles to his side drawer, which hides in the bottom a small sewing kit. Lambert slips out of the room in between Geralt sobbing and Eskel rushing to reattach the limb.

The fabric is weak enough around the seam, and Eskel is inexperienced enough at sewing, that the limb is noticeably shorter than the rest, but she's whole and in one piece by the end of the night.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Lambert awkwardly shuffles in place in their doorway the next day. "I-- fuck, man, I really didn't mean to..." He mutters, rubbing at the back of his neck.

Geralt holds Roach a little closer. "It's fine," he says tersely, "but no one's allowed to touch Roach anymore. Ever." He says firmly.

"Yeah, no, that works." Lambert tentatively steps into the room and then, when he isn't shooed out and no one starts crying, grows a bit bolder, sitting down on the edge of Eskel's bed. "I mean, except for nursemaid Eskel over here, right?" He says jokingly, and earns himself a punch on the shoulder from Eskel.

"Piss off, ya' little brat." He mutters fondly.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Years pass and Geralt and Eskel age out of Kaer Morhen. They get an apartment, split the costs, because they've basically never not shared a room, and they need all the shoulders to lean on they can get. All they really get is each other, so they settle for that. A few more years and Lambert is shoved out at the healthy age of eighteen-- just like they were. He's invited to their little apartment, and he's loud, and complains that he went from one roommate to two, bitches about how they're both sticks-in-the-mud who don't know how to have fun, and that they snore, and that he'll never get a good night's rest.

It's exactly what they were missing, and Roach watches all of it from her spot on the shelf near Geralt's bed.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Then, Geralt meets Jaskier.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The first time Jaskier comes over, Eskel and Lambert are both at work, so they have the apartment to themselves. Geralt opens the fridge to pull out two beers, and Jaskier flounces past him towards the shared bedroom. "I'm gonna' go root through your stuff without permission." He announces teasingly as he opens the door and slips inside.

Geralt snorts and rolls his eyes, taking his time popping open both bottles. He hears an exaggerated 'oooohh, interesting,' from the other room and carries the beers to his room. "There's really not much here to see." He says as he bumps the door open with his hip.

"Oh, I don't know about that." Jaskier replies from his place on Geralt's bed. "Who's this little cutie, huh?" His tone is light, teasing, and he's got Roach in his lap, playing with her ears.

Panic crawls up Geralt's throat-- she's old, now, and her ears were always a weak point. It's been years since he was sixteen, and her leg had come off so easily back then, so now... he shouts something strangled at Jaskier, maybe 'no' or 'stop', he isn't really sure, and Jaskier looks up with wide, startled eyes. He rushes over and drops the bottles on his night stand before scooping Roach out of Jaskier's hands. He doesn't yank-- terrified of what might happen to her stitching if he did-- but he isn't nice about it either.

He ignores Jaskier's stammering entirely, swiping his hand across her shelf to make sure there isn't any dust, before carefully sitting her precisely where she'd been. His hands tremble a little as they hover in the air in front of her, waiting to make sure she didn't fall, glancing over her to make sure nothing was out of place, that she still had all her limbs. After a moment, he lets out a shaky breath and steps back from the shelf.

"No one touches Roach." He says firmly.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know," Jaskier starts, and Geralt whirls on his heel, grabs Jaskier's wrist.

"Swear it." He says, squeezes Jaskier's wrist tight. "Swear you won't touch her."

"I won't." He sounds a little mystified at the afternoon's sudden turn, but he gently places his other hand over Geralt's. "I promise."

Geralt deflates a little with relief, loosens his grip and lets Jaskier's wrist slip from between his fingers. "She's..." he starts quietly, eyes averted, guilt and embarrassment creeping in over his sudden outburst. "She's really fragile. I... I didn't mean to... just, please don't touch her." He finishes weakly.

Jaskier agrees once more, reaches out and squeezes Geralt's hand reassuringly. They drink their beer in the living room.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Months pass and his friendship with Jaskier deepens.

Then, he meets Yen.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Hmm." She says thoughtfully, arms crossed over her chest. "I like your stupid little horse."

Her tone is light, teasing, and it strikes him right through the heart all the same. But, at least she isn't trying to touch Roach. He pulls her down into his bed, and the conversation is forgotten.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

They dance around each other like that for far longer than either reasonably should. Fuck, then fight, then silent treatment, only to fall back into bed and start the cycle anew.

He cares, really he does, and he knows Yen cares back, in her own way, but it's just all so... much. It's a little hard to take, most nights. As he lays there, unable to sleep, he catches sight of Roach out of the corner of his eye. His bed is cold and lonely, and thoughts of Yen won't stop swirling around his mind, and he just... he just wants to feel settled. Before he can talk himself out of it, he's carrying Roach down off her perch and curling around her to sleep with his old friend for the first time in a long time.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

A few months later, Jaskier uses his spare key to open the door to Geralt's apartment after a few rounds of knocking goes ignored.

He's got snacks, and a six-pack of beer that he deposits in the fridge, before calling out into the apartment, announcing his presence. He gets back a muffled 'in here,' and opens the door to the bedroom to find Geralt planted on the middle of his bed, Roach cradled carefully to his chest. "Sorry," he says weakly, sniffling into his palm, "I- I guess I forgot we were supposed to hang out."

Jaskier's by his side in a moment, kneeling in front of him on the bed, gently brushing his hair out of his face. "Oh, Geralt, what happened?"

He shrugs a little, helplessly. "Yen and I broke up." He pauses for a moment, rubbing little circles into the back of Roach's head, and then adds, "For good this time."

Jaskier reaches out and gathers Geralt up in his arms, lets him tuck his face in the crook of his neck. "I'm so sorry..." He mumbles, nosing into Geralt's hair.

"It's fine," Geralt replies weakly, voice cracking, "it was bound to happen sooner or later. We're kinda'... volatile."

Jaskier huffs out a humorless laugh. "Yeah, that you were..." The past-tense on Jaskier's tongue hits Geralt like a bolt to the chest, and he chokes out a sob. "Oh," Jaskier croons back, reaching up to cradle the back of his head, "oh, it's alright... it'll be alright..."

As he collapses forward into Jaskier's arms, he lets himself be soothed by Jaskier's voice, his arms enveloping him, and the softness of Roach's fur beneath his fingers.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

A few months later they kiss for the first time there, on his bed, in full view of Roach, which doesn't occur to him until later, but once it does it makes some small part of him wish he'd turned her around. She's seen enough of him, she doesn't need front-row seats to... that.

Then he realizes that she was also there for Yennefer, and he feels a sudden surge of guilt mixed with a healthy dose of shame.

His poor little Roachie.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The first time they fuck in his room, Geralt pauses with his hands on Jaskier's hips, blushing faintly. "Do... do you mind if I...?" He asks nervously.

"What is it, dearest?" Jaskier asks lowly, smoothing his hands up and down Geralt's bare chest, eyes all want and smoldering heat.

Geralt clears his throat awkwardly and lets go of Jaskier for a moment to reach up and carefully turn Roach so she was facing the wall. It's deeply embarrassing, but he hasn't been able to stop thinking about it ever since he had the realization about his time with Yen. He turns back around, expecting to be mocked, but Jaskier looks nothing except fond.

He laughs a little, but not meanly, and wraps his arms around Geralt's neck. "Good call," he says, pressing a kiss into Geralt's cheek, "don't want to subject poor Roachie to anything she didn't sign up for."

The complete lack of judgement, paired with the nickname, has a surge of affection swelling in Geralt's chest. He grabs Jaskier by the hips once more, and gently tosses him onto the bed. Jaskier laughs again, delighted, and opens his arms to grab at Geralt, who happily follows after him.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Geralt, look at this!" Jaskier announces from the couch, tilting his phone screen to the side as Geralt scoots closer and hooks an arm around his shoulders for easier viewing. "It's a stuffed animal repair service, but she runs a blog with pictures of the process and calls herself Doctor Beth. Isn't that the cutest thing?"

"Hmm." Geralt hums back. He glances at the screen, scrolls a little, but he quickly abandons it in favor of burying his face in Jaskier's neck and depositing kisses along its length.

Jaskier laughs and snuggles closer, but holds out his phone screen more insistently. "C'mon, Geraaalt," he whines, "you have to actually look. It's cute! You have to say it's cute."

Geralt flicks his eyes towards the screen once more, then away just as quickly as he deadpans the word "Adorable." right into the curve of Jaskier's jaw.

"You are the worst!" He announces, but he's grinning like a fool, and he turns his head into Geralt's affection all the same.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Once the kissing has died down, and Jaskier is seated side-saddle in Geralt's lap, he pulls his phone back out. "In all seriousness," he says, tucked up comfortably against Geralt's chest, "it's actually very interesting. She's really good at her job-- look at this, the bear's practically rags before she reconstructs it."

Instead of trying to distract Jaskier again, Geralt dutifully listens, watching the pictures as Jaskier flips through them. She is rather good, he has to admit, and there is something interesting in watching the stuffed animal go from rags to repaired, in the same way it's relaxing to watch an episode of How It's Made. He 'hmm's again, though it's a more thoughtfully, agreeing sort of ‘hmm’ this time.

"I've actually been following her blog for a little while now, and... I was just thinking..." Jaskier fiddles with the edge of his phone case, "maybe you could... send Roach to her, and--"

"No." He says, swift and firm. The playfulness has left his tone entirely, just the thought of sending Roach anywhere enough to make anxiety race through his chest and his palms turn clammy.

Jaskier's mouth twists into a frown. "Oh... sorry. I just... I know she's fragile and I thought this might help, so I--"

Geralt slides a hand up and down Jaskier's back soothingly. "It's alright. Thank you, for thinking of her, just... I... I can't."

He nods in return and straightens up to press a kiss to Geralt's cheek. "Alright, love, whatever you're comfortable with."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Now that Jaskier's said it, though, the thought won't leave Geralt's head. He scrolls through Doctor Beth's blog when he's alone, gets a feel for her track record.

Roachie is fragile now. Close to ten years with him, and she was already thin in some places before he got to her.

On the other hand, does he really trust some stranger on the internet to treat her right? What if she comes back wrong? What if, somehow, she doesn't come back Roach? He reaches out to run his thumb gently across her snout, looking to soothe himself, and watches as little tufts of fur come away under his feather-light touch.

He's already buried two Roaches. He really doesn't want to do again.

"Well, Roachie," he murmurs into the empty room, "third time's the charm, right?"

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

He is the closest to a nervous wreck that Jaskier's ever seen him in the intervening weeks. He'd packed the box with Roach so delicately, gently surrounding her with bubble wrap so she didn't get knocked around and somehow lose pieces in shipping, and as soon as the box was shipped he took to pacing the apartment and checking his phone every twenty minutes. Jaskier thought it was endearing, if a bit worrying.

It drove Eskel and Lambert up a wall.

There were a lot of movie nights in those weeks in an effort to keep Geralt's mind off of things, but inevitably about halfway through the movie he'd get a bit of a distant look in his eyes and he'd reach down to feel his phone in his pocket, make sure it was where he'd be able to feel it if he got an email.

Waiting to confirm materials, what color cloth to use and what eye matched best with her other in his opinion, what to do about her now rather sparse tail and mane.

Jaskier would touch his arm gently, bring him back to the present, and he'd turn his attention back to the movie, maybe sling his arm around Jaskier's shoulders. It was nice, and very sweet to see him so very concerned, but Jaskier did wish he could do a little more to ease some of Geralt's worries.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

There are, as Jaskier recalls, a few posts where people had sent in video of the results, of them opening the box and seeing their little stuffed animal friend all fixed up. And he knows for a fact Geralt's going to be excited to see Roach again, so when the box finally arrives and Geralt sits down on the couch with it, Jaskier opens up the camera on his phone without much thought.

And then has to set it down almost immediately.

As soon as the box opens, before he could even get his hands on her, big, fat tears start rolling down Geralt's cheeks. Jaskier drops his phone on the table without even bothering to turn off the recording, rushing forward to envelop Geralt in a hug.

Geralt's hands grip the edge of the box so tightly his knuckles turn white, and Jaskier holds him closer, runs his fingers through Geralt's hair soothingly. "What is it, what's wrong?" He asks softly. Geralt shakes his head.

"She just-- she didn't even look this good when I first got her and I--" He's cut off by another sob, and Jaskier holds him a little tighter. "I just can't stop thinking about e- every time she... she broke and I couldn't fix her and I h- had to just... just buy a new one and I... I..."

"Shh, shhh..." Jaskier quiets him gently, pressing a kiss to his temple. "It's alright..."

"I know, I know, she just... she's like new, you know?" He says weakly into Jaskier's shoulder.

That gives Jaskier pause. "Love... are you," he asks incredulously, "are you crying because you're happy?" Geralt nods, and Jaskier can't help the little laugh that escapes him. "Oh, my dear heart..." He murmurs, almost sickeningly fond as he nuzzles into Geralt's hair. "Why don't you pick her up, then? I'm sure she missed you."

Geralt reluctantly pulls back from Jaskier's embrace to look down into the box.

She really does look good as new, and Geralt's almost afraid to touch her. Maybe the new stitching isn't as sturdy as it looks, maybe she'll fall apart in his hands, or maybe she just won't feel right... He sucks in a breath and carefully curls his hands around her. All his breath leaves him in a whoosh.

He holds her in his hands, and something he didn't even know was unsettled, settles in his chest.

As he presses her close to his chest, she still feels like Roach.

Except now she looks like herself again. Whole and complete and strong.

"Thank you," he turns to Jaskier and wraps an arm around him, tugging him in close while the other keeps a hold of Roach, "I never would've done this if you hadn't brought it up. I... Jask... thank you so much."

"Of course, love," he says gently, carding his fingers through Geralt's hair, "got to look out for dear Roachie... where would you be without her, hmm?"

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"You know, she's so much sturdier now that she's all fixed up." Jaskier points out gently, after a few quiet moments have passed. "She could handle... well. Being handled more, again. She doesn't have to live up on that shelf anymore."

Which, kind of had been the whole point, but Geralt hadn't thought it through in so many words. The tears come back with a vengeance and he sniffles into Jaskier's shoulder, clutches her to his chest firmer than he's dared to in years.

That night, he falls asleep with Jaskier behind him, and his old friend clutched in his arms, and it's maybe a little silly, a little childish, but it's the best sleep he's had in his life.