#One has to appreciate the contrast between the two reunions.

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Heartbreaking Goodbye.

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[schleckermaul]

𝙥𝙝𝙮𝙨𝙞𝙘𝙖𝙡 𝙙𝙚𝙩𝙖𝙞𝙡𝙨! ಸヮಸ + ╰(*´︶`*)╯ — by @panwati

do they appreciate hugs? would they prefer to give hugs or receive hugs? what kind of hugs do they like to receive and/or give?

generally speaking, break hates phyical affection, hugs inclusive. there's exceptions, of course, sharon being the most notable. while he doesn't give or receive hugs often, there's less of a barrier between the two of them, touch more casual and expected. with break being her personal servant, they spend a lot of time together and kind of revolve around each other, physically?

(not to swing too far, but break also learns to rely on sharon more throughout the manga, so he starts seeking out touch more just for the sake of it, by himself. like here. and in more dangerous situations, they also start sticking to each other more! like here and here. it's a more genuine form of affection that break is still learning.)

he also hugs reim sometimes, but that's only because he knows it'll piss reim off in certain situations. (like here.) that being said, the barrier i mentioned also isn't as present between the two of them, only that they don't take advantage of it as much as break does with sharon. they're just ... next to each other a lot. which seems like a very quintessential way of describing their relationship, at each other's side. when they're genuinely affectionate, it's kind of begrudgingly.

and if we're talking about isola, he definitely has an easier time with his ladies. ismael is allowed to hug him, and he's learning to return that love without tension. nicolette is also a big one, where he's started seeking out touch just ... to know she's here. considering he was fully blind since entering isola, hugs are also a way to reassure himself and the other person of each other's presence without the influence of mad hatter helping him out. he's hugged oz upon their reunion, and he sticks to zhilan like a gummy.

still, most of the time, hugs aren't exactly wanted, and break prefers being the initiating party just so he's prepared and actually open to any affection. and when he hugs, he fits himself against the other person, arms wrapped around a waist, or an arm, or shoulders. it makes it easier to retreat, should he want to. (a stark contrast to the last hug we see from him in canon, which was all clinging desperation.)

[mocacheezy]

Finished watching The Super Mario Bros. Movie, (there's a good quality version on soap2day.to) so here are my thoughts:

🍄🍄🍄🍄🍄🍄🍄🍄🍄🍄🍄🍄🍄🍄🍄🍄🍄🍄🍄🍄🍄🍄🍄🍄🍄🍄🍄🍄

Good stuff:

The animation is super fun!

It's very colorful, but not in the way that it will make your eyes burn

Music I love the remixes of different songs from the games (especially the super star one at the end). There are also quite a few songs that are older and meme-y and they were so cool to hear!

I enjoyed the characterization of pretty much all characters

No Forced Romance I absolutely fucking ADORE that there was no on-screen forced chemistry when it came to Peach. Yea, Bowser is madly in love with her (or the concept of marriage, jury is still out on this one), but Peach? Nah. She has a bit of a rosey tint to her eyes when she first sees Mario, and Mario also likes her, but the movie doesn't force it past this. There's no "Saving the other", or "Victory kiss" or the like. They are traveling together to save the Mushroom Kingdom and Luigi, not to find a romantic partner. DK also pokes fun at Mario for a bit, and Toad also banters about it, but Peach doesn't confirm or deny anything, and Mario just says he's being friendly... Like, I genuinely think these two have a 'good friends that might become more' kind of relationship in this movie. And I love it, and I adore that we didn't have an animated kiss of any kind. It was so refreshing, and I was pleasantly surprised there wasn't any hand holding in that field of flowers.

The brotherly affection between Mario and Luigi

It was so good to see. It was wonderful to see them both excited, both of them supporting each other, and the reunion had me feel such joy. This is the kind of sibling love I sometimes wish I was capable of experiencing with my siblings. AND THERE WAS NO FIGHTING AND HURTFUL WORDS OR ACCUSATIONS HURLED AT EACH OTHER!!! This, this is so rare in the movies or shows I've seen before. It does make sense, siblings do stuff that annoys the other, but these two really stick together and care for eachother and rely on eachother.

Luigi not being just a scared incompetent guy He was terrified in that forest, got kidnapped, and when faced with a terrifying turtle looking creature that was very ready to start torturing him, he STILL denied knowing Mario for as long as he could. His line about "not knowing every guy with a mustache" made me smile a bit because it's TRUE, it's a GOOD POINT and EXCUSE, even if it didn't work. And he doesn't give up, he doesn't break down and think how hopeless everything is. Hell, he sees things and remembers Mario and how he always comes to his aid. I was also ecstatic that he ALSO BEATS UP BOWSER WITH MARIO. This movie isn't Super Mario, it's Super Mario Brothers!!!

Bowser. Jack Black did an amazing job. The animators and script writers have my undying gratitude. Bowser is now permanently on my Blorbo List. I will now stop talking or this post will be all about Bowser appreciation and gushing over the character and animation.

THE CREEPY ELEMENTS I had a Mario game for my Nintendo DS, and I could never play it because the water level with the eel scared me too much. I was terrified then, and seeing the eel now had me freeze up. A big NOPE. And not just that either, the skeleton Koopa, the masked lil guys, the creepy parts were very creepy. I adore it. And the bats looked adorable :> Meh stuff:

I didn't really like Toad at the start. I found him pretty darn annoying even. But his bravery as a sharp contrast to everyone abandoning their Princess is admirable, and he did grow on me as the movie progressed.

Seems that every situation requires an exclamation of "mamma mia". Now both folks on the internet and folks I've met irl do use it, and say they use it quite often, but there are also other phrases that could be used. Every mother in Brooklyn has hiccups at this point. And yes, I know it makes sense because this is one of the catchphrases Mario has. But still, I personally found it a bit meh/repetitive. I am not Italian tho, so my opinion on the matter can be discarded.

... honestly, there weren't many things I didn't enjoy about this movie, it was a nice one!

I give it a 10/10 + a golden star because THEY GAVE BOWSER A MINI PIANO!!!!

I also now have at least a few story ideas, because listen... I need that Koopa Wizard pinning after Bowser, I need this in my life-

In conclusion, 10/10, it's a nice time.

[existentialmagazine]

Review: LOS LEO’s newest bedroom-pop single ‘Six’ captures theatrical builds, simmering beats and a poignant tale of distance and love

After originally releasing their debut record ‘I Had a Dream Last Night’ exclusively to vinyl at the beginning of the year, the multi-talented upcoming artist LOS LEO now finds themself sharing their releases with the same building anticipation of your favourite TV shows. Over the next twelve weeks, LOS LEO will be releasing a new single from the album and promoting the deep discussions and hypothesising that surrounds them, with the season finale set to release on September the 22nd. Their newest offering from the release comes in the poignant form of ‘Six’, a bedroom/indie-pop fizzler you won’t be able to get enough of.

Flowing into his luscious bedding of sound with thumping electronic beats and shimmering synth, the experience of ‘Six’ immediately makes itself known to be one of instrumental fluctuations, evolving as you listen through and heavily intertwined within the emotions that come into play. A quick thudding of drum beats line an instrumental intermission, scattered with bright electronic pops, all deeply connecting you with your own racing heartbeat. Once again settling back down for the verse, the instrumentals soak back into a tranquil base with a slightly more prominent beat, but quickly things soar through an electronically growing mass of pulsations. LOS LEO sings atop this creative production of sound with their own glaring emotional undertones, softly but powerfully delivering every line with a bittersweet edge to it, capturing both the butterflies and the aching beneath them. Moments drenched in heavy vocal effects add another melancholic layer to the song’s development as LOS LEO seems to almost shout their pained words whilst they reverberate more deeply into the sound’s base. The track only continues to diversify, littered with beats you can never quite place the development of; rising drums that grow in intensity; protruding heavy synth and vocals that become more desperately emotive towards the song’s climactic end. All in all, there’s not a moment of the theatrically racing two and a half minute release that won’t have you deeply intertwined within its sound, inspired by

After LOS LEO headed abroad to write their debut album, the lyricism of ‘Six’ really found itself spilling out of their mind with a deep-rooted emotional connection and cathartic hope. Leaving behind someone they deeply cared for, ‘Six’ explores all the themes that come with growing distance and love, placing a reunion in the hands of fate and a longing to reconnect as true soulmates destined to be together. Opening with the painful introduction to and ending of their love story, LOS LEO sings ‘six months down and we’re on your front porch… time’s run out, goodbyes will never hurt so much’, immediately unleashing the devastating pain in his heart whilst he’s physically torn away from the one he wants most. With LOS LEO still thinking back on them despite the oceans between them, lines like ‘my heart beats now somewhere across the water’ emphasise their bond that exceeds just the physical, a connection of souls that are lost without their burning flame beside them. As time passes though, LOS LEO watches as their lover begins to move on with another, wrapped up in lyrics that plead for answers and a yearning for things to be as they once were: ‘if I head home now, will I sink or swim?’ Every heartfelt word of ‘Six’ resonates so profoundly, perhaps due to the nature of reality seeped into the song’s lyricism, telling such a bittersweet journey of love and two completely contrasting spectrums of what could be: someone still just as in love despite any time or distance apart, and someone who’s already moved on before the dust has settled.

Check out ‘Six’ here to appreciate LOS LEO’s catchy but meaningful soundscape and personal lyrical journey that’ll leave long distance lovers everywhere aching along too.

Written by: Tatiana Whybrow

Photo Credits: Unknown

// This coverage was created via Musosoup, #SustainableCurator.

[iredreamer]

(1) Hi! I'm the anon whose questions about 2.04's editing/lack of score etc. you answered in a 17 May post - no problems about taking a little while to get to it, I really appreciate your answer! Now I have thoughts about 2.06, in particular that final amazing exchange between the Ann(e)s, when Anne was both angry and anguished at the thought that she might not be enough for Ann, without children. It came to me today that I was reminded of the devastating "you came so close" 1.06 scene, when

(2) Anne cries in bed with Ann, exposing both her love and need for Ann’s affections, and sadness that she can’t (she thought) enjoy it in the long-term, stable way she craved. I haven’t liked a lot of the pacing of this season, and your great analysis a while back re the detachment of the camerawork (e.g. steadycam vs handheld, medium-range vs closeup) compared to S1 highlights another reason S2 seems less emotionally engaging. But this 2.06 scene went a long way to make up for all that! (3) And regarding pacing, I had found the scenes of Anne dealing with others (men) in her business ventures etc. to be somewhat too numerous, since they detracted from Anne/Ann scenes. But I guess they were meant to help contrast the public Anne from the one that only Ann sees on a regular basis, and to also show why Ann's full acceptance and love is so important to Anne ...

Hello friend :) lovely to read your messages. You mentioning the 1x06 scene compared to this scene made me think about a couple of things I wanna share...

It’s a rant, baby!!!

The – You came so close – scene is one of my absolute favorites, one I’ve tried many times to analyse and failed. It’s so personal for me that I really can’t put into words what it all means and what it makes me feel... but I digress. What I love is that these two scenes have some similarities but also Anne’s reaction is quite different.

In the 1x06 scene Anne completely breaks down because she sees her future, the future she longed for her whole life – I thoroughly intend to live with someone I love. I thoroughly intend to spend my evening hour with someone who loves me, someone who is there all of the time, to share everything with – completely vanish after she allowed herself to hope that it could become something real. And we see complete desperation, she doesn’t hold back at all – she tries at the start, but really, she doens’t try that hard. She’s not trying to be strong or stoic or anything of the sort. She makes herself completely vulnerable and I think she does it because she knows there’s nothing she can say or do in that moment to make Ann Walker change her mind. There’s nothing to lose because nothing actually became real. She also understands Ann and why she “can’t commit” to her, so she’s not mad or confused about Ann’s choice in the end. The whole thing doesn’t really come as a surprise to her. It still hurts her but it’s a kind of pain she knows.

What happens next is that Ann Walker, as always, surprises Anne (in the hilltop scene) and shows her that she’s brave and strong enough to commit to her, to face whatever may come next. At this point – after season one, after the reunion, and the wedding – things change significantly between them. Ann has made her promise and with that promise she’s basically saying that she understands all the implications of her choice. Their relationship is at a new stage and it is very different from the one we see in the 1x06 scene. They moved past all that. Or at least they should have.

When in 2x06 Anne sees that some of the things she thought were settled between them can still jeopardise their relationship she’s completely caught off guard. And we see how scared she gets as soon as Ann mentions children. This scene is quite different from the – You came so close – scene for a number of reasons:

their relationship is at a very different stage;

Anne – till that moment – was sure that their union was a strong one and now, all of a sudden, she’s not so sure anymore;

Anne’s completely caught off guard by what’s happening;

Anne has a LOT to lose here because the future that was only a possibility in season one now has become a reality;

everything is new – what happens in 1x06 happened to Anne before, many times – but this, now, her commitment to Ann, Ann moving into Shibden, their life together and all that, is a completely different thing, it’s new and Anne has no previous knowledge of how to navigate it all.

I think that these things are what make Anne react a little bit different this time around – we still see her be vulnerable and scared but in this new scene she handles the situation in a very different way.

Again, she has so much to lose here now that the future she longed for actually became a reality, and her fear to lose it all is even greater. Plus, she finds herself in unknown territory. She has no idea how to handle the whole exchange with Ann, she’s not sure what’s the best thing to say, she’s not sure what could happen next, she’s not prepared for this kind of pain. She doesn’t know it.

What does it feel like when your wife leaves you? What do you do after? I imagine those are some of the things that really hit Anne in that moment. And she has no answers to those questions. It’s all new. And she’s terrified to find out what the answers are. From all this, I think, comes the way she reacts and the fact that she tries very very hard to not break down till the very end. The pain she’s feeling, the extreme fear, the confusion are very new to her. And she doesn’t really know how to handle them properly.

She tries to rationalise and be strong, she doesn’t want to break down and cry. She’s calm at the start, trying to understand what Ann si saying. Then she can’t stay still anymore and she raises her voice. Then she reacts in a very impulsive way burning the letter. Her voice shakes when she tries to communicate what she’s feeling and what she needs from Ann. She raises her walls at first because she thinks she’s about to lose Ann and she won’t let Ann see her be vulnerable if that’s the case.

But finally she shows her vulnerability. And at the end it is Ann Walker who – with her caring touches, and extreme delicacy – let’s Anne know that she’s not going anywhere, Anne can break down if she needs to, she doesn’t need to keep it all in, she can feel scared and vulnerable because ultimately she’s not alone anymore. She won’t be left alone with her pain – Ann Walker is there with her.

I think both these scenes really shed light on how different the Ann(e)s are when it’s time to share and communicate things that scare them. In the scene from 1x06 it is Ann Walker who pushes Anne Lister to be sincere and open up about what is bothering her and in this new scene it’s Ann Walker the one who doesn’t shy away from dicussing difficult, potentially painful matters. Anne Lister is the opposite, when things scare her – when she’s scared she might lose Ann – she tends to not address the issue. For example she doesn’t open up about what happened with Mariana (even tho Ann Walker gave her more than one chance to do so) and in this latest episode (2x07) she doesn’t address the fact that she won’t be able to introduce Ann to her London friends.

Anyway, I’m not really sure where I’m going with this but yes, the last scene of episode 6 was the best scene of the whole season and really the whole episode was just exquisite.

[yurimother]

LGBTQ Manga Review - Alt Hanakage Double Feature

I often proclaim that Yuri is for everyone and can be made by anyone; that the quality of the story and characters exists regardless of the creator's sexual, gender identity, origin, or any other status. Some of the greatest Yuri works, both in the general opinion of Yurijin worldwide and my own slightly divergent beliefs, have come from such diverse authorship. However, while "Yuri is for everyone" is both a hardened personal stance and a historical fact, the genre is about lesbian content (if not always lesbian identity) and thus dramatically benefits from the presence of lesbian creators. In my 2020 article Yuri is for Everyone, I wrote an equally true statement aside "Yuri is for everyone," that "it is still important to prioritize the voices of those with the experiences and identities depicted in a work." Alt Hanakage is one such voice.

There are a surprisingly high number of Alt Hanakage's creations available from English publishers, considering that the vast majority of her work is doujinshi, alongside a few short series from Funguild's Cherish label. While her manga focuses on adult characters, the individual content is quite diverse, spanning the gauntlet from a silly appreciation for abs in Boyish2 to the incredibly dramatic Sexual Liberation (a problematic favorite of mine). However, the feature that kindles my deep, enduring appreciation for this artist is just how queer everything she writes is. As Hanakage has openly admitted, her own experience as a lesbian informs her writing, inspiring her forthright presentation of LGBT identity and issues.

Lilyaka manga publishes two of Hanakage's Yuri doujin in English. The first, Senpai no Kohai, is a reunion between a young woman and the girl she used to admire, based on an event from the author's life, but with a more romantic turn. And the second, Put a Ring on My Finger, communicates the frustration of Japan's LGBTQ+ community, as they remain barred from marriage equality. Eager to check them both out, I put aside my admirative opinion of the author to examine each doujin.

Senpai no Kohai follows Sayuri, an office worker who glimpses her former college kouhai, Nakayama, walking down the street. Sayuri is shocked to discover that Nakayama is the newest employee at her company, making them Senpai and kouhai again and bringing the former's old feelings bubbling back to the surface.

The story is compact, given that there are only two short episodes. Each issue has a conflict and a revelation that comes with a resolution and advancement of the women's relationship. Hanakage creates depth for both characters, giving each a short, narrated flashback centered on a pivotal moment of their past together. By having them reflect on this shared period, we see how it affected them both individually and how it colored their bond and inevitable romance. It does not feel repetitive, as their stories contrast each other, with Sayuri explaining the events that led up to it and Nakayama revealing the metamorphosis she experienced in the aftermath. Lastly, both characters' experiences will be relatable to many queer people as they struggle with common issues like unrequited love and discovering one's own identity.

There are a few less satisfactory aspects of Senpai no Kohai. The central conflict of the second episode sees Sayuri pushing her junior away, apparently disgusted by her own queerness and wanting to protect Nakayama from it. It feels a bit too forceful and dramatic, jarring with the realism the rest of the doujin exhibits. The manga needed more time than the limited space of a single doujin episode to explore the self-devaluation because, as is, the rapid escalation amounts to little more than melodrama.

Furthermore, while the character designs were appropriate for the adult characters, there are occasional, uncanny discrepancies with their proportions. For example, in one panel, a character's legs appear excessively longer than her torso, and in another, her shoulders are awkwardly wider than her hips. Hanakage also employs excessive use of screentones with mixed results. While the shading occasionally makes panels pop, its prolific presence can crowd the page. In a few pages, it engulfs the linework, muddling expression and dialogues as overabundant smatterings of patterns override figures, backgrounds, and objects simultaneously. Lilyka's low-resolution "common" ePub definitely did not help the situation. Fortunately, the publisher allows you to download purchases in various formats, the rest of which were higher quality.

Ratings: Story – 6 Characters – 8 Art – 4 LGBTQ – 9 Sexual Content – 2 Final – 6

Ring On My Finger is, by comparison, a much shorter work, just about ten pages long. It has no little plot, and the characters do not even have names. This choice allows the two women in this manga to act as blank canvases for readers to attach themselves, empathetically or sympathetically onto. Amplifying the emotion experienced as they read, the women reflect on 30 loving years together by reading an old letter.

The short and touching speech, accompanied by simple flashbacks and a lack of details, elegantly describes the moments of extreme jubilation and sorrow of queer couples: Sharing a drink and an "I love you," holding hands to warm up in the winter, and laughing long into the night together, but at the same time, enduring the withering jeers of strangers, stand up against the careless comments of the ill-informed, and shedding tears into each other's shoulders as they cry themselves to sleep. It is a beautiful and emotionally resonating survey of queer romance.

A single central expression encapsulates these days, one which many consider the ultimate ceremony of love, marriage. And, as same-sex marriage remained outlawed in Japan, a ban recently held up by a district court in Osaka, it is with tears in her eyes that Ring On My Finger's character swears, "until the day I can marry you in this country, I will not give up." It is both a lamentation and a hopeful wish, a prayer that the injustice end.

I have written before that I am privileged enough to have been born at a time and in an area where those I was exposed to openly embraced queerness. Indeed, I never experienced discrimination firsthand and was not even in elementary school before my state legalized gay marriage. Before I graduated high school, this right was ubiquitous across the country. However, I still understand the tremendous effort getting to that momentous day and the indignity so many suffered through and continue to experience, particularly as the looming fear of that right getting insidiously snatched away looms for so many in my country. So, while I cannot speak on the emotions firsthand, I genuinely feel that Hanakage has masterfully conveyed them.

Ring On My Finger was another reminder of the cruel, tumultuous reality queer people experience every day, sent via a hopeful and impassioned plea, desperate to communicate the unbearable pain and overwhelming love. I dearly hope that it reaches the eyes and minds of an audience unaware of these feelings because it is the type of short, simple work that could help to spark compassion. And I sincerely recommend you get a copy of the doujin on Lilyka right now. It is available with a "name your own price" tag, so you have no reason to ignore it.

Final Rating – 9

Check out Senpai no Kohai and Ring On My Finger digitally on Lilyka today.

Reading official releases helps support creators and publishers. 

Special thanks to Ring On My Finger editors Leroy G. & J.F. and letterer Salina U.

I would love to thank the translator of Ring On My Finger, and the localization team for Senpai no Kohai, unfortunately, Lilyka made the unfortunate choice not to credit them.

This review is made possible by the support of Avery Riehl and the YuriMother patrons. Support YuriMother on Patreon today for exclusive articles, early access, and to help fund LGBTQ+ content.

[guzhuangheaven]

Guzhuang Appreciation Month: badass dialogues

(but in the novel)

legend of ruyi :: ep 5 // ep 78

This drama is so amazing, demonstrated by these two scenes. Here you have Ruyi and Hongli watching the same play at two different stages in their lives. In episode 5, they are still clearly in love and are happy watching the play together, leaning lovingly against each other and moving in unison as one. They are also being watched fondly by Aruo, who has yet to have ideas of betraying Ruyi. Many years later, in episode 78, we have Ruyi and Hongli watching the same play, but they are physically far apart and their emotional distance from each other is also clear on their faces. They are literally being divided by the presence of Ling Yunche standing between them.

I find the parallel between the closeups of Aruo and Ling Yunche the most heartbreaking, because Aruo, despite how happy she looks for them in ep 5, would eventually try to break Ruyi and Hongli apart. And yet for all her efforts, she never succeeds because Hongli never actually believes her. On the other hand, Ling Yunche never tries to get in between Ruyi and Hongli, but just the mere presence of him is enough for Hongli to drive a wedge between himself and Ruyi. The presence of Aruo and Ling Yunche in this scene drives home the stark contrast in how the relationship has deteriorated between Ruyi and Hongli, and how Hongli went from trusting Ruyi despite all evidence against her to believing the worst of her despite no real evidence. 

What is even more heartbreaking is the play they are watching. It’s not made very clear in the drama, but the plot of the play has great significance in the novel. The play they are watching is called 墙头马上 / Over the Wall and Atop a Horse. The play is based on the poem 井底引银瓶 Silver Vase at the Bottom of the Well by Bai Juyi.

The poem by Bai Juyi, writes of a broken relationship/friendship where two people once lived happily in harmony, then one person wronged the other, causing the other person to leave and never come back; the relationship is thus severed. 

When the poem was adapted into the play 墙头马上 / Over the Wall and Atop a Horse, the play tells the story of Pei Shaojun falling in love at first sight with Li Qianjin when she was standing by a wall and he was on a horse riding by her house. The two then eloped, and lived together for seven years, having two children together, before they were discovered by Pei Shaojun’s father. Upon the discovery, Li Qianjin was condemned for getting into a clandestine relationship and Pei Shaojun caved to parental pressure and divorced her. She went back to her hometown. Many years later, after having achieved political success, Pei Shaojun went looking for Li Qianjin again, and just happened to discover that the two of them were actually engaged as children. In the play, they then reunited, got remarried and lived happily ever after.

There is however a plot point in the Ruyi novel, where Qingying does not like the ending of the play, feeling that the happy ending was forced. In the novel, Hongli and Qingying only know each other in passing at first. Then on the day that Hongli chooses his wives, Qingying is made to attend by her aunt. Before the selection ceremony, everyone is invited to watch a play, and Hongli chooses Over the Wall and Atop a Horse. Qingying, because she dislikes the happy ending, asks the theatre troupe to change the ending of the play so that in the end, Li Qianjin does not actually get back together with Pei Shaojun but stays firm in her resolve to end the relationship between them. After the play ends, Qingying leaves before the selection, but Hongli becomes intrigued by her changed ending and chases after her. This conversation below ensues, in which you can see clearly how Qingying’s belief on the matter stayed constant with her through the years. In fact, she practically predicts her own fate later with her changed ending.

~*~

Qingying stepped lightly ahead, her gown fluttering in the breeze like a white butterfly in flight. Aruo’s face was robbed of all colour and she was crying in despair. “Gege, what is wrong with you? Everything was well, why did you change the ending of the play? If Huang Hou Niang Niang hears about it, what will you do?”

Qingying shrugged. “At most, Aunt will just scold me a little. I just don’t like that ending. Today, I finally got to see how it should be played out. I’m so happy!”

“Gege might be happy,” Aruo said miserably, “but today is the consort selection. If Gege you are not chosen, then what would we do?”

Qingying’s aunt had already intended her to be the Third Prince’s bride, and now that was not successful, she should be pushed to the Fourth Prince instead? If they needed this one forced marriage to prolong their family’s glory, would that mean all women of the Ulanara clan were little better than slaves? It would be better this way. Regardless of whether she succeeded at being chosen to be a prince’s consort or not, she got to see things done her way, for once.  

She only managed a few steps more when suddenly a voice called behind her. “Qingying Meimei!”

No one had ever called her that before. Everyone in the palace simply called her “Qingying Gege”. Curious, she turned her head to find that Hongli was chasing after her.

Thinking that he must wish to reprimand her, Qingying made herself as small as possible.

Hongli only laughed. “I chased after you to comfort you. Xiyue Gege was rude in speech, I feared that you would be offended.”

“Offended? About what?” Qingying asked in a low voice. “Fourth Prince, do you mean to mention the fact that I was rejected by the Third Prince?”

Hongli nodded, frowning. “I only fear such talk will destroy your reputation.”

Qingying laughed, all her teeth showing, against all rules of decorum, which seemed to astonish Hongli.

“I don’t care!” she declared. “There are many things that women can’t necessarily decide for themselves, such as marriage, or family. But at least, I can decide whether to mind those mocking talks, whether to care about them and let them hurt me.”

Hongli looked sad for a moment, whispering, “Your family…” But then he trailed off. Then, with a humourless smile, he said, “Over the Wall and Atop a Horse is the play I chose myself, why did you not like the ending and asked them to change it? I pick a plum blossom, lean against the wall. / You ride off among the bending poplars*. Is that not a lovely image?”

“Yes, it is very nice, it’s just…” Qingying thought a moment then said, “Over the wall and atop a horse we gaze at each other. / I know you, too, must be heartbroken*. From this beginning, the play is full of conflicts, ups and downs, all very compelling, yet in the end, there is a forced happy ending, everyone is forced to be happy, I really don’t like it at all.”

[* excerpts from the poem by Bai Juyi]

Hongli looked displeased, asking, “To be able to mend a broken mirror, husband and wife reunited and at peace again, is that not good?”

“When Li Qianjin was being insulted by Pei Shaojun’s parents, he did not protect her. He watched her leave in humiliation and did not stop her, as if all the love and years they shared did not matter. Such a heartless and weak man who dares not protect his woman, why would Li Qianjin want to get back together with him?”

Her voice was soft, but also full of conviction. Even though it went against Hongli’s beliefs, he wanted to keep her talking.

“To be reunited and together in harmony is the wishes of all families on earth. If Pei Shaojun is willing to start over, why would Li Qianjin not forgive him?”

“Why must a woman always forgive a man for his failings? Wouldn’t that teach the man that it doesn’t matter what hurt he causes? I don’t care, if he hurt her, she shouldn’t forgive him.”

“Women must be soft and gentle, and give into her husband. If she sacrifices a little, bears a little hurt feeling, they can be reunited, isn’t that happiness?”

“If she must be hurt, must sacrifice herself for this forced reunion, then it is already not a good marriage,” Qingying said stubbornly. “In my eyes, Li Qianjin is a woman who is willing to walk away, to severe the relationship, because all trust is gone.”

“If she walks away, wouldn’t that mean she spends the rest of her life alone? Everyone has their own difficult moments, if Li Qianjin is so stubborn, Pei Shaojun is put in a difficult position too.”

“Who isn’t in a difficult position?” Qingying asked. “If the woman can understand the man’s difficulties, can a man not understand a woman’s pain of being cast aside and humiliated?”

Hongli thought for a moment then laughed. “Qingying Meimei, you are much too unbending.”

Qingying merely nodded. “It’s better to live the rest of your life alone, rather than live to old age with someone who already betrayed you once. So it might be harmonious today, but if a conflict arises, what is to say Pei Shaojun will not just forsake Li Qianjin again? It is easy to change mountains**, that is the principle here.”

[** there is a Chinese saying that it is easier to change the course of rivers and shapes of mountains than to change the character of a person… aka old habits die hard but with more stakes.]

Hongli still did not agree with her logic. “Women should place obedience before all and be pliable. If she does not restrain herself and be more accepting for the greater good, then she would just suffer.”

“If one must accept being humiliated for a so-called happy ending, then I don’t want that kind of happy ending,” Qingying repeated.

“Then is Over the wall and atop a horse we gaze at each other so easily forgotten?” Hongli asked, astonished.

Qingyin turned and stared at Hongli. “If it is not easily forgotten, then why didn’t Pei Shaojun protect Li Qianjin? Hasn’t he too forgotten how they once loved each other when he cast her aside?”

Hongli could not argue against her, and finally admitted defeat. “Meimei, you really are something, I don’t know what else to say.”

Qingying laughed in delight.

“Meimei,” Hongli said, stepping closer to her, “you argued so animatedly, you must love Over the Wall and Atop a Horse. Why don’t we go back and hear the play again?”

Qingying hesitated, thinking that it would be a great loss of face if she were to return now. But Hongli was looking at her so earnestly, she found it hard to immediately refuse.

“I’ll go back first, and prepare good tea to wait for you.”

He said ‘wait’, as if he would not move the day along if she did not come. Her heart softened, and she suddenly stopped in her path.

…

[And then of course Qingying comes back to attend the selection. Hongli, who had originally intended to choose Langhua, changes his mind and chose Qingying to be his di fujin, but then Yongzheng interfered and put a stop to it… But the play is one massive foreshadowing plot device that doesn’t get explained much in the drama, but packs a punch when you read this scene.] -h

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 305: Worst Intervention Ever

Previously on BnHA: Shinomori, whose name took me an entire week to memorize, was all, “nice to meet you Deku, I’m ten feet tall, do you want to know how I died?” and without waiting for an answer explained that he kicked it from old age at forty thanks to good ol’ OFA. Deku was all “wait a minute, then how come All Might, who’s fifty-five and is definitely dyeing his gray hair, is still alive?” First and Shino were all, “we really have no fucking clue but we think it’s cuz he’s quirkless, JUST LIKE YOU!” So basically, since quirkless people don’t exactly grow on trees these days, Deku is probably going to be the last user of OFA. The chapter ended with Nana being all, “psst, Deku, about my grandson. Uh, can you kill him?” which is sure to lead to a very interesting conversation this week.

Today on BnHA: Nana And The Gang are all “so, Deku, how can we put this delicately. The thing is, we’re pretty sure that AFO really fucked my grandson up, so on the off chance you can’t save him, how would you feel about, you know... [throat slitting gesture].” Deku is all “idk you guys, I kinda feel like he’s really just a traumatized child at heart and he’s in a lot of pain and stuff and so I should try to help him.” The Vestiges are all “BUT WHAT IF YOU CAN’T” and Deku is all “BUT I WANT TO TRY, DAMMIT” and the Vestiges are all “well when you put it that way, we, uh, were just testing you, so congrats, you passed!” The chapter ends with First being all, “ANYWAY SO WHY DON’T YOU TWO SHY BOYS STANDING OVER THERE IN THE SHADOWS COME SAY HELLO” before we CUT AWAY FOR ANOTHER WEEK, goddammit.

seriously, Nana

just... have you met Deku?? look, if you really want Tomura dead, just sic him on the U.A. first years and tell Shouto and Honenuki that it’s a training exercise

oh my god lmao

we’re too far away to see Nana’s face here so I will just assume that she turned and is staring DIRECTLY INTO THE CAMERA for this one line lmao. “I just wanted to clarify in case anyone felt inclined to take my dialogue out of context and spend an entire week complaining about it”

oh my god?! are you all purposely trying to make me sad??

someone stop me before I launch into an impromptu rant about all my Tomura feels. WHY IS NOBODY STOPPING ME. oh my god but yes, exactly. he’s just in pain all the time. this is exactly why I think Tomura has such high redemption potential even though so far he seems to lack so many of the redemption arc essentials such as feeling remorse, wanting to change, and taking responsibility for his actions. the reason why I’m willing to overlook all that in his case is because Tomura has essentially had zero agency his entire life. AFO molded him into a killer by making sure he was in constant mental agony, and making it so that the only thing that even slightly relieved that agony was killing peeps. like, please don’t think I’m making excuses for him or anything, but if you take a child and manipulate their existence to make it virtually impossible for that child to grow up as anything other than a killer, and basically never give him the chance to be anything else, then no shit he’s gonna be a killer?? he’s basically never had the choice not to be. it’s never been an option for him. anyways I feel like I am EXPLAINING MYSELF SO BADLY but nonetheless I am prepared to die on this hill

anyway so now Nana is all “that’s a rhetorical question btw because Our Hearts And Minds Are One so we can feel everything you feel bro.” so yeah, that’s interesting

now Banjou is getting started on the “let’s try and talk Deku out of wanting to save Tomura because it’s insane” part of their OFA Mystical Space Void Reunion agenda

look, Banjou, I feel you, I really do. you guys don’t think it’s realistic that Deku can defeat Tomura without killing him. so if it’s a choice between killing Tomura vs letting Deku and everyone else in the entire world die, then duh, you think Deku should kill him. I get it! and if this were a real life mass murderer I’d totally agree with you. but the problem is that this isn’t real life, this is a sympathetic shounen villain with a tragic past who might as well have FUTURE REDEMPTION ARC RECEIPIENT stamped on his forehead at this point

so First is all “look, there’s absolutely no doubt my brother has fucked this kid up good and proper by now”, which, again, fair

though, that’s kind of exactly my point though. everything that Tomura is, everything he’s done, he’s done because of AFO. AFO has so effectively shaped his personality and his worldview by this point that it’s all but impossible to penetrate that. he’s AFO’s puppet. but the problem is that rather than treating him like a victim, you all are treating him like a casualty. like he’s already a lost cause. but good luck trying to convince Deku of that

WHOA WHAT, RANDOM SUPER-IMPORTANT AND BIZARRELY UNRELATED EXPOSITION DROPPED IN JUST LIKE THAT??

way to still not reveal Sixth’s name, btw. THE PEOPLE WANT TO KNOW, DAMMIT. but also so this confirms something we basically already knew already, which is that not even AFO can steal OFA. it literally can’t be taken away by anyone unless the owner wills it. SO SUCK ON THAT AFO YOU EGG

(ETA: so I have no idea why this was omitted from this translation, but apparently the Sixth’s name was revealed as “En”, which is obviously not his full name but at least it’s something. also he most likely has a fire or smoke-related quirk based on the kanji used, 煙.)

so Banjou is saying that Deku’s “lack of an iron will” could be a disadvantage against AFO. hahaha what?? Midoriya “I’ll break all of my bones without blinking an eye just to protect someone” Izuku lacks an iron will? do tell

he says this is going to be a test of Deku’s determination. well yeah, no shit. but just not in the way you guys think

OH HELLO AGAIN

darker hair again here! but I don’t trust the contrast in these scans at all after last week. his coveralls are way darker than they looked before too, and you can clearly see he’s standing in the shadows now

(ETA: yep, once again the raw shows that his hair is considerably lighter than what’s shown in these scans here. although there’s no mistaking now that his hair is consistently being colored in this slightly darker shade, and it’s not just the lighting.)

anyways lol First was saying something about how AFO can’t steal OFA, and they’ve spent all this time cultivating it as the ultimate weapon against AFO, and blah blah blah. go on then, keep lecturing

NANA GODDAMMIT NONE OF THIS IS YOUR FAULT

girl what?? you did everything in your power to protect your family, and AFO, fucked up man that he is, targeted them anyway. there is one person and one person only to blame for what’s happened to Tomura, and that potato-faced asshole needs a good kick in the balls

NANA GODDAMMIT DON’T MAKE ME COME OVER THERE

SO HELP ME GOD!! I WILL GIVE YOU THE BIGGEST HUG YOU’VE EVER HAD!! THAT IS A THREAT

so now Nana is all “I’m just going to call my grandson a Thing to ensure that fandom has only the freshest, grass-fed no-hormones-added discourse this week”

I don’t even need to drop into the tags to know exactly which specific people are going to respond to this, and what kind of posts they are going to write lmao. everyone’s all caught up in the “that thing”, and meanwhile I’m over here completely hung up on this “nay” that’s appeared out of NOWHERE you guys. look at that. she really said “NAY”

Nana, my love, my dearest, I feel you girl I really do. but he’s not an unforgivable manifestation of pure evil, Deku is exactly right actually, he’s a boy in pain. you guys need to stop questioning Deku’s shounen protagonist instincts here and just let him work his sparkly magic. “let’s try and convince Midoriya Fucking Izuku that he can’t save someone” is a plan that is NEVER going to turn out well you guys

“DEKU GODDAMMIT WHAT IF WE CAN’T SAVE HIM” lmao it’s like an intervention

“DAMMIT DEKU JUST ADMIT YOU HAVE A SAVING PEOPLE PROBLEM!”

RED ALERT IT’S ANOTHER CLOSE-UP OF THE BACK OF MISTER TWO BON CLAY’S HEAD OMG

(ETA: I was too distracted with freaking out about Two and Three to really appreciate how ridiculously handsome First looks in this panel. but on my second readthrough it stood out so much that I had to go back and add an extra bullet point just to talk about how hot he is. look at him. wtf.)

THAT IS DEFINITELY AN UNDERCUT. THE PLOT THICKENSSSS. also those are fucking exhaust vents on Mister Three’s neck. MISTER THREE COULD YOU POSSIBLY BE RELATED TO THE IIDAS, PLEASE TELL ME YOUR SECRETS I’M DYING OVER HERE

so now Deku is launching into what will undoubtedly be a “saving people problems require SAVING PEOPLE SOLUTIONS” heroic counter-speech!

I mean, they can already feel the “lol nah I’m gonna try and save him” feelings running through him lol. ~OuR hEaRtS aNd MiNdS aRe CoNnEcTeD~ and all that. this is just a formality, but that doesn’t mean I don’t love a good shounen protag speech

oh wait hold up, do you mean to tell me that the whole “hearts and minds are connected” thing I was just mocking just a paragraph ago actually allowed Deku to feel what Tomura was feeling?? like literally feel it??

YET AGAIN these Tomura feels are pounding on my front door you guys?? they just will not quit?? people my house is already full of feels, does it look like I need you to sell me any more of them?? -- what do you mean, they’re free??

AW YISS THAT’S IT DEKU. THAT’S SOME GOOD SPEECH RIGHT THERE

I appreciate the contrast here between the Douchebag Triumvirate of Overhaul, Muscular, and Stain versus the Misguided Twosome of Gentle and La Brava. never let it be said that Deku doesn’t know the difference between a redeemable villain and an unredeemable one

OH NO -- OH MY GOD

someone please help me I need directions to the OFA Spooky Galactic Nebula Realm in this fictional Japanese manga land. it’s not on google maps. I need to give these two babies a big hug and wrap them up in a blanket and treat them to some McDonalds Happy Meals please help

other things: (1) ENDEAVOR CHILLING OUT IN DEKU’S “PEOPLE I HOLD DEAR” PANEL LMAO NEON DISCOURSE EXTRAVAGANZA, (2) “ONE FOR ALL IS A POWER TO SAVE, NOT TO KILL” I’M ABOUT TO CRY DEKU I LOVE YOU SO MUCH HOW IS IT EVEN POSSIBLE TO FEEL ALL THIS LOVE, (3) [SLAMS HANDS ON TABLE] THERE’S YOUR MOTHERFUCKING IRON WILL!!!!!!!! -- I’m sorry, please don’t call security, I’ll be good

I just randomly remembered that Deku is still saying all of this in his muffled “FMMPHHMMPHMM” voice and I’m somehow cracking up lol. so actually it’s a very good thing Their Hearts And Minds Are Connected, otherwise they’d no doubt be all, “...what?”

(ETA: so I completely missed this on account of it literally not being visible in the scan at all, but in the raw you can clearly see Baby Kacchan and Baby Shouto fanboying over All Might in two of these panels, and excuse me, ma’am??

thank you very much Deku for including them in your montage, particularly since you’ve never seen Baby Shouto before lol. amazingly accurate image you managed to conjure up, all things considered.)

SDKFJLSKHG -- AS IF ON CUE???

HE’S SO ADORABLE HELP?? Trippy Space All Might looks like he’s about to cry, and First is all “don’t crack a smile... you have to be Firm and Serious here... dammit, don’t smile” omg

anyways! YOU GO DEKU. “MY QUIRK MY RULES, BITCHES” damn, son

KLJLKKHLG TRIPPY SPACE ALL MIGHT LITERALLY ACTUALLY IS CRYING ALL MIGHT HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME

“I JUST... [CLENCHES FIST] REALLY LOVE SAVING PEOPLE” FUCKING HELL LMAO THIS IS THE WORST INTERVENTION OF ALL TIME

Deku is literally all “sure, maybe I’ll have to kill him, but have you guys also considered, MAYBE NOT??” it’s no use Nana he’s too powerful

LMAO FIRST

“like I’ve been saying this whole time, you should definitely try saving Shigaraki Tomura.” “but, uh... First, didn’t you just -- ” “shut up”

(ETA: clearly it’s not just his brother who inherited those smooth-talking genes.)

so now Deku has turned back into a sixteen year old and his clothes have gone missing again. just OFA things

dskljdlsklgk

yes... sure... “testing” you...

HEY

FIRST OF ALL, DAMN YOU HORIKOSHI YOU MADE NANA CRY. even if I’m pretty sure they’re actually tears of happiness/relief. and SECOND OF ALL, “TELL MY BOYFRIEND I SAID HI” DJSKDLKJJL ANYWAY MAYBE GRAN, NANA, AND MR. SHIMURA WERE IN A THROUPLE

[SCREAMS]

WHY WOULD YOU END IT THERE?? WHY WOULD YOU END IT THERE!!!!!

(ETA: and two-to-one odds that we cut away to some other scene once they finally start to turn around next week. I’M CALLING IT NOW. giving myself a week to brace myself for the rage.)

fucking hell. well if anyone needs me I will be adding Horikoshi fucking Kouhei to the list of irredeemable villains, peace

[imagine-lcorp]

Written In The Stars (One Shot)

Request

Hi! Can I request something like Lena falling in love with an alien reader?

A/N: Hey guys!!! First one shot of the year!!! Let’s hope we can keep the rhythm this time...also I broke my phone so I’ll probably be less active on the app...the writing is still going tho so yaaay! Anyway, I hope you enjoy this one and as always, let me know what you think! Love ya beautiful people! 

Lena Luthor x Alien!R//Word Count: 2,204 -------------------------------------------------------

When she was younger, Lena Luthor used to look at the night sky with infinite awe. The map of stars that hung above the Earth had been the place where she could find solace and a sense of peace. The stars were never alone, always needing one another to form their constellations. They reminded her she was also not alone even if it seemed like it.

However, as she grew up most of that wonder translated into scientific interest, which started to diminish as she found herself enthralled by more practical sciences. The sky, as vast as it was, was a mystery she recognized she couldn't unravel in her lifetime. She needed to focus on more earthly things, but she was content to be another curious viewer of such canvas of light.

Being a curious viewer, however, was something that changed abruptly when the existence of extraterrestrial life was proven by no other than Superman. Even more when it was known the Earth had been a refuge for many more aliens than it was possible to believe. The stars had reached the Earth, and they came bearing their own cosmic forms of life.

The population had been divided between those that accepted and welcomed the space travelers and those that rejected the idea, defending their right to their land and planet, fearful of an unstoppable invasion, living with the enemy and whatnot. For a while, Lena found the latter to be a matter of great concern. She wanted people to feel safe and believed they had the right to know who among them was or not an alien.

It wasn't until Kara came to knock that idea off, presenting her with an alternative story and reminding her that those aliens too had a right to their own freedom. She opened her eyes to the reality most of them lived. They were mmigrants of desolated planets, seeking shelter from wars and just like Superman, seeking a new home after their planets had been shattered. There were a few bad seeds, yes, but most of them were only looking for a better life. Wasn't that enough to give them a vote of confidence?

Her alien detection device was then transformed into an image inducer, a new gadget that helped aliens conceal their true appearance if they wished to look physically human. It was great to blend with the crowd, and it was a great success in the alien market.

"Miss Luthor, Kara Danvers is waiting for you in the conference room." Jess told her one day as she arrived to the office.

"Kara?" She found herself surprised by the sudden visit of the journalist. "Does she want another interview?"

"No, she has come along with someone else. She said she only needed a few minutes with you."

"Alright." Lena said leaving her purse on her desk and taking a couple of files from Jess to revise them later. "Let's see what it is."

Lena Luthor entered her conference room to find two figures chatting amicably at the room table. One she could recognize immediately, with her golden locks and bright smile, the other she had no idea who it was but as soon as your eyes were on her she was curious to find out.

"Lena!" Kara said rising from her chair, with you following suit. "Thank you for meeting us in such short notice. We promise not to take too much of your time."

"Kara, of course. How can I help?"

"Well, actually, I would like to introduce you to (Y/N) (Y/L/N)." At the mention of your name, you stepped forward, extending your hand to Lena. "It's a pleasure to meet you, Miss Luthor."  

"Lena, please." She said taking your hand.

"Then, please, call me (Y/N)." You said with a firm grip and a kind smile, something rare for Lena to see during those days.

"(Y/N) is the leader of an alien race residing in National City." Kara continued with a proud stance.

"Is that so?" Lena replied with a raised eyebrow and the hint of a smirk on her lips. "Is (Y/N) your real name?"

Lena's words prompted a chuckle from you, and you decided to clarify before there were any misunderstandings.

"It's my chosen Earth name. I don't think you have enough tongues to be able to pronounce the real one." You said with a playful smile. "Also, I wouldn't go that far. I am what you would call a representative, and it is of a small group only. Miss Danvers here is just too kind."

"She is, indeed." Her smile only grew bigger as she saw Kara fail to conceal a little pout.

"Well, you're still a great representative." Kara said.

"But to what do I own the honor of you visit?" Lena said gesturing to you to take your seats again. Kara smiled at you and moved along with you towards your seats.

"Right." You said pulling a small box from your jacket. "I'm here to deliver this."

Lena took the little box from your extended palm, her curiosity growing as she inspected its contents. Inside she found a little black matte icosahedron, nothing extraordinary by the looks of it.

"What is this?" She finally asked.

"The alien community wanted to thank you for creating the image inducer. It has helped a lot of people, especially those of us that don't exactly fit into the human shape." You started to explain as she inspected it.

After the launch of her device, Lena recalled, the company had received countless letters and e-mails, most of them in gratitude for helping the aliens in National City as they were still fighting for acceptance within the human population. It helped them find jobs, housing and places to be without having to worry about their looks or if other people reacted negatively to them. It helped them feel safe.

Only then Lena understood the impact it had on other's peoples lives and how her work had helped them accomplish that.

"So this is a thank you gift." You moved your hand and placed a finger on one side of the icosahedron.

Lena was startled as the other sides of the new device in her hand started to open. Suddenly the room was filled with a clear colorful light, but it was more than that. It was lines and spheres and points and spirals well defined. It took her a moment to realize what it was but Lena found herself looking around the conference room with a fascination she thought she had long lost. As the conversation followed, you explained Lena the device in her hand was a space chart. It contained information about several planetary systems, their galaxies and stars, and common routes to reach them, you said as if it was nothing but a travel guide.

Lena turned her eyes towards you a few seconds later, ready to declare her own gratitude when she noticed your expression. You were staring at a far corner of the room, not with the usual distant look of a daydreamer or that of someone who has lost interest in the present moment. You were looking with intention and, more than that, with longing in your eyes.

"It's wonderful. Thank you." Lena finally said, pulling you out of your thoughts. You blinked a few times before the smile returned to your face.

"If you ever wish to know a bit more about what's out there, you can always consult it and if you need help navigating it, I'll be more than happy to help."

Lena thought about it for a moment more. While she had long ago left her intentions of unraveling the skies, she saw a chance within those stars. This was the opportunity she had been hoping to find in National City. If she could gain the trust of the alien community, she would be able to expand her work and better help not only them but the whole city. To help put the world back together instead of tearing it apart. She was more grateful then to you, for giving her that chance.

Besides, she thought, it was also a chance to fulfill her curiosity about you.

It wasn't long after that meeting that you were back at her office, teaching her how to use the space chart. Her attention bouncing from the lines of stars and planets to understanding the technology behind the device. While her studies on science and astronomy made it easy for her to identify the structure and functioning of the chart, and the several celestial bodies it showed, she still had to learn how to translate that into terms she knew and relearn the names people used to refer to their own planets and stars. You did your best trying to explain how both things worked, which she highly appreciated.

As days passed, Lena took a new liking to your teachings which turned into more personal reunions. You didn't limit yourself to talking just about stars or planets but about the different cultures that inhabited them. Mentions of your home planet became more regular and you even used it to contrast the big differences between Earth and the rest of worlds you had known. Lena was delighted to indulge in such conversations, taking in as much as it was possible.

The way you talked about your home planet, your country, if such concept even applied, your family, your house, everything, was enough for her to look at you with the same awe she used to look at the stars when she was younger. She knew she wouldn't get to know all the stars in the universe but just knowing you, she thought, made up for it all.

"The sunsets there were hours of golden light washing over the citadel, and the nights were, oh, the night was too beautiful with its waves of light across the sky." You told her one day as you both had finished one of your reunions.

You were leaning against Lena's balcony, both of you observing the sun go down behind the city skyline.

"You know, I don't think you have ever showed me where you're from." Lena said, crossing her arms and taking a step towards you, seizing the opportunity. You had showed Lena at least dozens of planets, especially those closest to Earth's solar system but yours, for everything you talked about it, somehow still remained a mystery.

Lena felt a slight pang in her chest as she saw the smile in your face turn sad.

"No, I suppose I haven't." You said and after a moment, where you seemed to ponder a few options, you moved your head, signaling Lena to follow you back inside her office.

You took the space chart from her desk, activating it and moving your hands again until the hologram in the room moved, showing a single planet in the center of the room. You took a few steps back and gestured to Lena to take a closer to look at it.

"Here it is."

The planet, surrounded by seven moons, was a very Jupiter look-a-like. Lena was instantly enthralled by the colors and the stripes, swirls and waves that formed the planet's atmosphere. The hologram displayed a name in a language Lena certainly didn't know and that made her wonder just how many tongues she would need to pronounce it correctly.

"It's beautiful." Lena said, still looking at it.

"It was." You replied, and she turned to look at you with a confused frown and a question clear in her face.  

You moved the chart once more, reducing the image to show the whole system your planet used to be a part of.

Lena saw other nine planets but only one caught her attention as its name was being displayed in an alphabet she actually recognized.

"Krypton." She whispered, eyes widening in shock.

Everyone already knew the story. How the almighty Kryptonians had traveled to Earth when their own planet had been destroyed. But no one, including her, had thought too much about what it had meant for the rest of their own little universe. Lena imagined it then, an explosion setting a chain reaction. Not only one but several worlds shattered, with their people trying to escape the path of destruction.

Lena's eyes landed on you once more, finally understanding the longing she had once seen in your own eyes. She also knew, in some way, what it was to lose your home. So she approached you, slowly taking your hand and muttering an apology, for whatever little comfort it could give you.

"It's alright." You said looking intently at her with a reassuring smile. "I found a new home."

"And I'm glad you found it here."

You made her feel at home, Lena thought and, as she smiled back at you, she thanked the stars for giving you both the chance to find a home along each other, and hopefully, one day, a home for you both.

[half-filled-inkpot]

Go Stream Your Name Engraved Herein NOW

I’m tired of people dismissing the depth and beauty of works because they don’t understand the cultural and historical context and are unwilling to delve deeper. I’ve heard the vocal confusion and dismissal of the short film Bao and the complaints that the Mahjong scene in Crazy Rich Asians was too long and too difficult to understand for people who’ve never played Mahjong. But I won’t let this mentality negatively frame the reception of Your Name Engraved Herein. I’ve read too many interpretations of the movie that will influence how many people will watch it and hinder appreciation for it and I cannot sit idly by. So here’s why I appreciated and loved Your Name Engraved Herein and think that what other people interpreted as shortcomings are actually in fact strengths. 

In 2019, Taiwan approved same-sex marriage, marking a step of progress in Asia. Reviews of the film Your Name Engraved Herein view that this forward direction should be celebrated more throughout the film, believing that the heavy mood and painful scenes of bigotry hindered the potential of the film. Many have thought that the toxic values of the past dominated the film’s atmosphere, casting a somber mood and making it difficult to stomach. But I think these elements were essential in reminding us that not everyone had the opportunity to love openly and celebrate, and although Taiwan has made progress, what about those that grew up under a time where such rights were denied? 

I think the film is an intimate and beautiful homage to the people who lived through such a difficult time and had to fight for such rights--the director’s own experiences, the reference to activist Chi Chia-wei. Despite the tough topics and the painful bullying that we see, I think the film ends with beautiful light and hope. 

Spoilers ahead

Where critically acclaimed and famous Taiwanese films like Us and Them and You Are the Apple of My Eye use flashbacks to create an air of nostalgia and to remind us that maybe all we have to share is our past, untouchable memories, Your Name Engraved Herein uses flashbacks and time leaps to instead paint a more hopeful future. Their first love was an epic story. It’s painful realizing that they never got the same privilege as so many of us to have a happy family or spend life together, growing old. But where the protagonists in Us and Them and You Are the Apple of My Eye only have the past, our Jia-Han and Birdy have the future for the taking. Jia-Han’s younger self once held reservation and denial but he has instead transformed into one willing to accept his love and act on it, searching for Birdy despite the years. Despite the time and distance, they still share the same lively and youthful banter. While one may interpret the ending scene of what could’ve been and what they were cheated of, I like to think of it as a reunion instead. They are finally able to return to maybe the most tumultuous but also happiest time of their life. Now, with the recent change in Taiwan, they finally have a chance to make more memories together. 

I loved the framing of the story and think it demanded audience engagement. The movie opens with Jia-Han meeting Birdy. We then see that Jia-Han is reminiscing about his story with Birdy to the priest from Montreal that works at the Catholic all-boy’s boarding school. Immediately, Jia-Han’s and Birdy’s connection is apparent. They have furtive glances, genuine concern, and intimate moments. Birdy at first seems free-spirited, without fear of the opinions of others and authority. He’s vocal, righteous, and a bit rebellious. Jia-Han, in contrast, is more timid, constantly aware of the opinions of others and the rules. While he knows what is wrong and feels bad about it, he often follows or acts as a complacent party. But as Birdy and Jia-Han witness the detaining of activist Chi Chia-wei, we see that Birdy is more introspective and serious, unable to turn a blind-eye of the issues still prevalent despite the recent end of martial law in Taiwan. And Jia-Han, in the presence of Birdy, is more carefree and happy. It’s as if they have switched and turned off their outside persona. Birdy’s impulsivity gives Jia-Han joy and only Jia-Han’s presence can qualm Birdy’s inner thoughts and worries. We get to see how these characters deeply value each other. As the evening sets and the world around falls to slumber, it feels as if they are the only ones in the world and we, as viewers, are fully immersed in their story. The cinematography is halting as we see them zoom around in the city alone, untouched and in their own worlds. 

Jia-Han feels as if the world revolved only around them. So when Ban-Ban walks into the picture, I was awed by Jia-Han’s portrayal of jealousy and felt his pain because he was unable to walk by the side of Birdy in the way that he wanted to. The actor’s body language sells a stellar performance, but it is the dialogue and outburst at the father who is attempting to tend to Jia-Han’s wounds that show Jia-Han’s raw and powerful emotions. Whether or not it was intentional by the director, I think at this moment we question the timeline and framing of the story. What events led up to this moment with Jia-Han’s major head wound? When the priest says “If he doesn’t love you, don’t force him to” and “care doesn’t necessarily mean love,” I was stunned by this exchange, thinking that it was quite evident that Birdy and Jia-Han had love for each other. But then it made me ponder if this narrative told only from Jia-Han’s point of view was a deliberate choice made for us to question perspective and reality, how our vision becomes tainted when our feelings are involved. The powerful performance and film raised such immediate questions, causing wonder as we viewed the film in real time instead of afterwards, which made for a delightful and thought-provoking experience. 

In a truly climatic point, we finally see how all of the events led to the current moment. We see how Jia-Han gets a head injury and how the priest becomes his confidant. This pivotal mark not only has an approximately two hour momentum, but it is also powerfully performed by our two leads who at this point are passionate, protective, and broken-hearted. We witness a full range of love. Initially, at the beginning, we saw subtle and restrained affection, fleeting touches, and silent companionship. But as the story progresses, we see that these feelings can no longer be bottled. There are moments of visible and passionate concern and instinctual attempts at protection. This development shows the complexity, beauty, and pain of love. It is truly a breath-taking thing to see come alive on screen. While Jia-Han at this point becomes ready to vocalize and admit his feelings, Birdy is unable to and their lives diverge. 

A time leap gives us privy to Jia-Han’s closure. After he visits the resting grounds of the priest from his high-school days, he is able to offer his support to who is hinted to be the priest’s lover, reassuring that he was a good man, that the love was true, and that he will go to heaven. The reveal that the priest is gay encourages viewers to rewatch the dialogue with this new information to help drive our new interpretations. 

Already, I have re-watched this tear-jerking film a number of times. The steady pacing makes each scene seem essential despite the long 1 hour and 54 minute run time. Yet it passes quickly and we are left yearning for more. Aesthetically pleasing, the beautiful shots underscored by the accompanying, swelling music provide stunning visuals. As the camera focuses on the two leads, their outbursts don’t appear as overly done or too dramatic. Rather, the performances feel heart-breakingly real. In part, I think this is built on the focus on the details. The camera seems to linger a little longer on the faces of the actors, making us fully digest what they are conveying to us. This attention to detail highlights everything spoken and unspoken. 

I highly recommend this film. It reminds us that not everyone is fortunate and we all still have room for progress. But simultaneously it is tender and heart-warming, moving and touching, poignant and thoughtful. The powerful dynamic between the leads, the artistic filming, and the strong performance elevate this film to a truly inspiring, epic love story. Everything about it feels deliberate, personal and handcrafted gift for us to truly treasure. So I will cherish it and share it and I hope you do too.

[vaguely-gestures-to-the-void]

Hindsight: My thoughts on Loki (2021)

Welcome back folks. Read the innocence dying inside me as I accept that this show eats my expectations for lunch and leaves me like it's going to buy milk.

As a side note from what I said in my first review, here’s an interesting article. Apparently I was clowning because the Gobi desert scene was filmed (probably? idk) with the tech from the Mandalorian. I think the studios were the same. Oh well. https://www.atlasofwonders.com/2021/06/loki-filming-locations.html

Episode 4: THE NEXUS EVENT

Pre-title scene

The new perspective of Asgard is incredible.

Oh baby Sylvie, what did they do to you. Also, RAVONNA??

The TVA through a child’s eyes is heartbreaking. The mixed use of shots that were familiar (the feet walking into the TVA) and new (the TVA logo on the floor) convey how though routine, this is an alien experience for Sylvie.

She too wants to help the man being dragged in. Maybe Sylvie was a better person than Loki, the TVA taking her away was what changed it.

We don’t see Casey, but iIt’s the same ‘sign here’ guy. The changing perspective and music really alters the mood created, contrasting the whimsical procedure we followed in episode one.

She hadn’t even said much in her life. They knew how to influence the audience’s emotions, that's for sure. Props to the actress, I felt genuine concern for her before I remembered that she’s acting.

TVA

Ravonna probably underestimated Sylvie as a Loki, a mistake that cost her greatly.

The golden doors.

Ravonna looks tense and a bit fearful.

Scattered throughout the episode are eyes watching. George Orwell’s 1984, anyone?

Big Brother is watching.

Mobius! He’s a good friend to Ravonna, but there’s a power imbalance.

Ravonna is shaken. Her past failure is haunting her.

Someone edit the “What? How?” into “Wow.” It’ll be a service.

Lamentis - 1

Loki’s apology and Sylvie reflecting on her childhood are the conclusion to the previous episode. Faced with death, Loki realises that her goals were hindered by his actions. His apology is the first time he acknowledges he had something to do with it. Sylvie’s offering her emotional vulnerability in the form of memories. Her mind and experiences are her most prized possession because they’re all she has of the person who she was as Loki, her childhood and what she was supposed to be. Her glorious purpose, what really makes a Loki a ‘Loki’ was her life.

THEY TRUST EACH OTHER. THIS WAS WHAT CAUSED THE NEXUS EVENT.

C H A R A C T E R D E V E L O P M E N T.

Ravonna pointed out that Loki will always be a “lying scourge” but they went against this. In any timeline, this could cause a nexus event. They found a middle ground.

“That should be setting off alarms if someone steps on the wrong leaf.” I had a whole idea about entropy and the timeline being an isolated system but I struggled to define an isolated system, and thus I couldn’t use the whole irreversible process causing entropy to grow causing a br- if you have a clue of what I’m going on about, or want to know more, I’ll explain my thoughts. I can understand why this isn’t scientifically accurate and I’m no physicist.

The unbranched timeline means all the things that were speculated - Wanda’s kids, what happened on Saakar, all of it - is gone.

“Any news on C - 20?”I called it! B-15 is having doubts! Her subtle unease building up throughout the ep is perfect!

Most settlements have a street design that can be from space. Sharru doesn’t.

“No. We may lose... ...you’re amazing!” Damn it literally took the end of a world for Loki to change as a person.

“Their smiles. If that isn’t people accepting their deaths I don’t know what is. Man, I just want both of them to be happy.

Please don’t let that be the love theme, it’s so pretty.

The music fading into the TVA theme as they get separated is so sad.

Time Theater 25

Back to square one in terms of trust with these two, but now they have history and hurt feelings too!

Oh Mobius.

Cycles are a part of who Loki is within Norse mythology (from what I know, correct me if I’m wrong). This scene is conflict.

Loki needs both Mobius and Sylvie to incite change. One can empathise whilst the other believes in him.

Mobius believes in Loki like no one else in the TVA. He treats him like an individual, they developed a bond in episode 2, so his disappointment and anger were genuine. This is reflected in their dialogue.

Even when Loki was going through all the Feels in ep 1, he didn’t shout at Mobius. It makes it more heartbreaking when Mobius laughs and dismisses him after the “TVA is lying to you” thing. His laugh was so bitter, it’s like his belief that Loki would be the variant to prove that variants were individuals had been shattered. What Mobius doesn’t realise is that Loki was genuinely trying to warn him. The trust between them was fragile but Mobius needed to come to his own conclusions before he could see that Loki had broken out of the mold the Time Keepers set for him.

“Just kind of an asshole and a bad friend.” Y’all, Mobius doesn’t rise to Loki’s baits. He’s so hurt.

I can’t be the only one that thought Loki was going to be brainwashed when they saw the red door. Turns out it’s just a time cell.

I love Mobius but he makes me feel so conflicted. Oh shit, he’s my problematic fave.

Watching Loki get his ass handed to him by Lady Sif shouldn’t be this funny.

This particular memory reflects what Mobius will talk about later, Loki being abandon by the people around him.

Putting Loki through a memory that was physically and emotionally painful was nasty. If you hear something horrible, over and over especially from a friend it would take a toll on your self-perception. Mobius was hurt by Loki leaving him, he’s getting revenge whilst doing his job and getting into Loki’s head.

Ravonna’s office

Ravonna has hang ups from failing with Sylvie. Who she is and what she knows is going to be interesting.

Heck I just realised are Mobius’ lapels not real? They look fake.

I wonder whether the “mastermind” thing was foreshadowing the next ep.

Am I the only one who thinks this isn’t the first Loki Mobius has dealt with? Could that mean there’s a reunion next ep?!

“Variant pet.” There’s a culture of dehumanising variants within the TVA.

The cuts showing both B-15 and Mobius’ faces reminds me of ep 1, but now there’s a new angle to things. B-15 certainly sees things differently.

Time Theatre 25

Lady Sif would kill with short hair. Or long hair. It’s Lady Sif, she’s a badass.

Loki’s exhale reminds me of how he tenses before a fight.

Notable things about this scene:

Heavy use of metaphors to trade jabs.

The lights are shifting in a consistent pattern, scanning the room almost.

Shots are constantly moving and cutting.

Loki’s speech pattern changes when he’s lying. Nice touch there.

When they start arguing in earnest, the shots are close ups of their faces, not circling around each other.

Loki was at first willing to talk to Mobius if he was treated with respect, the way they engaged in episode 2. He also wants to trust that Mobius won’t kill him. Mobius dismisses him (rightly so, his trust is gone) and Loki’s pride about ‘not working for anyone’ gets in the way rather than listening to each other. Loki’s behaviour is cyclic and his lying about Sylvie affirms Mobius’s understanding that Loki won’t (or maybe can’t) change. I wouldn’t be too surprised if Mobius is a Loki, the man’s uncannily good at reading him. He deduces that Loki and Sylvie have a bond and unsettles Loki to get answers out of him, because he knows that’s the only way he can force Loki to reveal his cards. He definitely wasn’t expecting Loki’s earlier admission to be the truth. What Mobius did was not right, but it sure was effective.

“No. Not partners.” I believe this. They had an understanding, but their goals differ. Maybe just give Sylvie her own show.

“Guess you don’t do partners.” MOBIUS WHY ARE YOU SO BUTT-HURT? Probably to make Loki feel bad ik, but it’s still funny to think Lightning McQueen is salty.

That memory really hurt Loki. He stuttered.

Loki fixates on Sylvie rather than his own freedom. This was the cue to Mobius to start interrogating.

Bruh, the feeling they were experiencing better be friendship.

This made me uncomfortable because I was so sure we weren’t gonna get a romantic subplot that I related the characters to my actual family relationships. Marvel. Why?

The music combined with Mobius’ subtle shift in demeanor from irritated to mockery was very unsettling to me. I never realised how good an actor Owen Wilson was.

“Our interests are aligned.” Once Mobius tells him the truth, Loki does the same. I really hope this is the extent of their relationship. Just let them recognise one another as equals. Please Marvel.

Mobius’ hands twitching, the slight swallow. Yeesh, he certainly doesn’t think Loki’s lying, but he’s not about to accept it.

Loki’s head shake is sad. He knows he can’t convince Mobius.

“That I can respect. I mean the lies you tell yourself.” This was the best writing imo. Loki doesn’t make any final attempts to connive his way out of the situation because telling the truth to someone he’d trusted had failed. He willingly walks into the Time Cell.

Time Theater 47

B-15 being unable to support herself, having to rely on the structures around her to stay upright. This woman deserves so much y’all.

WE NEED HER NAME MARVEL.

You better appreciate her beyond shipping her with Sylvie or istg.

The music is so mournful. It just emphasises how much everything changing is going to hurt not only the main characters. Lives change because of the TVA and the events of this episode, it’s not overlooked by the writing or music.

The poster and the 1984 parallels. Exquisite!

Sylvie not sitting straight made me snort.

Ravonna Renslayer’s office

More Theremin music! This time I’m pretty sure it’s Carnival of the Animals, XIII. Le Cygne (the Swan) : Le carnaval des animaux: No. 12, Le cygne (arr. For theremin and piano) by Clara Rockmore.

Fun fact! Clara Rockmore influenced theremin music and the instrument and was a virtuoso of the instrument. Give her a google, it’s worth it. Also look up Leon Theremin, he was (among other things) a Soviet spy. There’s a great Wiki spiral for anyone there.

Mobius was probably being lined up for a high position in the TVA. Damn.

TemPads are personal, or have different levels of clearance.

Mobius didn’t stop interrogating Ravonna throughout that scene. He knew that she wasn’t telling him the whole truth.

Sleight of hand wasn’t shown how Loki and Sylvie do it, they didn’t use misdirection.

Ravonna knows something is up with Mobius. Maybe he hasn’t been around for long if this is his ‘career case’.

The pacing becomes really fast like in the end of episode 2 as conflicts get resolved. Buckle up comrades.

2050 Roxxcart Disaster

I don’t have much to add, it’s a powerful scene.

They use close ups whenever a truth bombshell is dropped.

The music varies considerably between these scenes, each one has a different tone.

“We’re the same.” With what she knows of B-15, Sylvie knew not to be smug when delivering the news about B-15’s life.

B-15 crying in the rain hurts.

“I looked happy.”

TVA archives, Time Cell, Time Theater 25

The floor opposite Mobius is FE3, above it is 3FG.

Oh Mobius.

C-20 deserved better, I'd love to see her later in the series.

The music goes from mournful to harsh and we’re left in silence when it cuts to the Time Cell.

“You told me to shut up.” Loki can be salty sometimes.

“Do you really think you deserve to be alone?” Mobius is rattled, he wants to unsettle Loki.

The music starts to build somewhere between “...your connection... “ and Loki saying “‘WE?’”

The faint tinkling reminds me of the Avatar (blue people) score.

“How about the word of a friend?” This is Loki’s olive branch. When he admits Loki was right, their trust is tentatively reinstated.

The music is finally back to that chaotic theme we know. I think it’s the TVA’s theme.

“You can be whoever, whatever you wanna be, even someone good. I mean just in case anyone ever told you different.” Mobius corrects what he says in the first ep.

They are friends y’all I’m so sad.

Mobius can lie through his teeth like it’s nobody’s business.

Pruning hurts, Mobius’ face is in agony.

Loki’s tears. GIVE THEM ALL JETSKIS.

Ravonna takes a moment to compose herself.

Time Keepers (the final smackdown)

Why are the last 10 minutes always so insane?

Loki’s eyes only show hurt. I’ll leave.

Ravonna’s so sharp, she instantly catches Sylvie’s wet hair.

All of our expectations from the trailers always get yeeted out of a window because the scenes are never really what we think they are. I get that that should be expected but it’s refreshing that the writing is never what we think it is.

Did anyone else notice the egg timer/infinity sign murals on one of the hallways to the left of Sylvie?

Ravonna is so cold (and yet I’d simp for her).

The M.C. Escher staircases I see you set designers/CGI folks.

B-15 just gets knocked out. They better not kill her for no reason or I riot.

I’m pretty sure that Sylvie ripped off one of Ravonna’s TVA badges (or buttons) when she fought her.

Sylvie’s the better fighter, she’s had to use it more often though.

The elevator doors stay open.

It would be so funny if we get an elevator scene where Sylvie is just dragging Ravonna somewhere.

They really led us on with the Time Keepers, particularly the middle one. I was somewhat convinced there’d be something more to it. I’m interested to see where it goes.

Ep 4 review

I really don’t have much to add with these last two episodes. I’ve definitely come to appreciate that no matter whether you liked the writing of the show or not, it’s never what you expect. Is that a good thing? I guess that that remains to be seen. Nonetheless, I appreciate how much effort went into this series. It’s been a fun romp, I’ll be back with my reviews of the final episodes. I’ll also stop posting Loki content to my blog because the Gods know that my followers don’t read this lol.

I’m just going to survive until the season is over and then hopefully keep my sanity together until the next Marvel content or at least Dr. Strange.

Here's the link to my episode 3 review.

Thank you all for being here, you're wonderful my loves.

[cienie-isengardu]

The development of Law’s relationship with Zoro - Part 5: Zou, The Kindred Spirits (Reunion)

<<Part I: Before Meeting>> <<Part II: Sabaody Archipelago, The First Meeting>> <<Part III: Punk Hazard, The Alliance (A)>> <<Part III: Punk Hazard, The Alliance (B)>>  <<Part IV: Dressrosa, The Breaking Point (The Plan Failed)__ (Saving Law)__(Protecting Law)__ (Birdcage, Pica and Doflamingo)__ (Aftermath)>> <<Part V: Zou, The Kindred Spirits (Traveling Together)__(Searching for Nakama)__ (Reunion)__ (Ninja-Pirate-Mink-Samurai Alliance)__(The Last Moments before War)>>

In the absence of Law, Straw Hats rarely mentioned their ally. Zoro did so once (chapter 814), when the matter of Sanji leaving the crew for his marriage with the 35th daughter of Big Mom was discussed. Pirate Hunter in serious tone talked about their current situation and what was awaiting them in nearest future:

“Just think about it!! We’re currently on a course that can’t be changed. Remember what Caesar said about his business. Doflamingo’s biggest trading partner for SMILE was Kaido. When we destroyed the research lab on Punk Hazard, that got Doflamingo mad. And now that we’ve destroyed the factory on Dressrosa, the next guy down the line to snap on us is Kaido of the Four Emperors!! Just like Jack, the guy who wrecked this place he’s not some far-off menace anymore… it’s only a matter of time before he comes down on us!! The reason we’re aligned with Traffy is for the fight ahead. And Kaido’s also got his sights on Kinemon’s group for reasons we don’t understand yet. We’re set up for an imminent confrontation with Kaido!!!

Zoro was fully aware about the seriousness of the situation and did not take lightly the matter of confrontation with angered Kaido. In contrast to Luffy whose idea of alliance is another name for friendship, he understood the alliance was done for pragmatic reasons.

And then, Zoro vented his frustration at Sanji and how him leaving the crew complicated everything and even argued with Nami. Luffy decided to go after the missing crewmember, against Zoro’s objection. Once Luffy and Nami met with Pekom to learn more about Sanji’s past, they were told that Black Leg’s marriage was a political deal between Big Mom and Vinsmoke Family (Germa 66) and had nothing to do with Straw Hats… except Sanji becoming Big Mom’s underling. That of course didn’t sit well with Luffy who was determined to bring Sanji back no matter what. As it turned out, Zoro was sitting outside the building and listened to all of it.

Of course, asked by Luffy, Zoro denied being worried and again said to let Sanji go. Zoro’s words sounded cruel and harsh, but in the face of upcoming fight with Kaido, could stream from pragmatism. He wasn’t happy about the situation.

Then, Luffy and Zoro for the first time met Nekomamushi who jumped on them with “Garchu of Gratitude”, literally crashing both with his big body.

And so, when Law finally came back, chaos greeted him:

Luffy was laughing, Zoro was ready to cut in pieces the local King of the Night (under whose care Law’s crew was the whole time), while the said ruler was bleeding to death. Law wasn’t around Straw Hats for like two days and most likely the sight was pretty confusing… or not, since Straw Hats have a knack for making ruckus.

Frankly, at this point in the story Law already had a chance to see irritated Zoro, but not to the point of picking a fight with a heavily injured person.

Luffy noticed Trafalgar and his crewmates. Turned out, Law came with Heart Pirates to give an introduction...

...only to ignore them all in favor of discussing with Luffy some matters.

Despite Law’s dark reputation, the Heart Pirates as a group seemed to be the complete opposite of their stoic, emotionless captain. At the same time, the lack of “emotional involvement” does remind Zoro to some degree, whose similar lack of openness and dwelling on sentiments was also met with crew’s critique and insulting/booing The best seen after Vivi’s departure; all crew members called him out on his lack of heart.

Law finally was informed about the situation with missing Sanji.

↪ The same as Zoro, Law was unhappy (frustrated?) by the turn of events.

↪ Zoro and Law again were in close range of each other.

Law explained to Luffy that Zou was supposed to be safe place to lay down for a while, but now Kaido knew about it and that put everyone in danger. The waiting for his return with Sanji was not an option.

This moment is similar to the one from Dressrosa, when Law confronted Luffy about their plan. Then, it was Straw Hat who worried about the people of the country if he did not fight Doflamingo. Now it was Law who worried about Minks (maybe because of Bepo?). Zoro, like last time, did not take part in the captain talk.

Law’s worry about Minks delighted the natives; the alliance already saved them and even now pirates worried about their well-being. What gave another chance for a great party,

There was no sight of Law, even though his crew was having fun alongside Straw Hats. Zoro found a drinking buddy in wolf(?) Mink. It seems like Law is not fond of partying and maybe drinking too. This time Roronoa and Heart Pirates didn’t try to force him into anything.

Chapter 816 & 817 brought to light the connection between Wano and Zou and who Momonosuke truly was. The two Mink leaders took samurais, Straw Hats and Law (who wasn’t a witness to the revelation about the Kozuki clan yet was invited) to meet the ninja, Raizo (chapter 817).

Law and Zoro, again, were in close range of each other, both traveling at the end of the group. They most likely didn’t talk to each other, or at least the manga (and anime episode) did not provide any indication of that… unless the “chatter” sound effect above Franky & Nami included them too. Then again, Zoro and Law are the quiet type of people who don’t talk just for talking sake.

In a secret place, the group finally met Raizo. Luffy, Usopp and Chopper were the most excited about meeting a true ninja and wanted to see his ninja techniques. Even Zoro and Law added their requests to the long list of their demands.

↪ The additional “murmur” added to Law’s bubble speech makes it looks like Trafalgar said his request more under his breath than aloud like Luffy, Chopper and Usopp (which may be a reason why he looked quite shocked / surprised once Raizo showed clone jutsu). Manga did not provide where Law and Zoro stood then, but based on this chapter episode 769 clearly kept those two close to each other. What could mean Zoro heard Law’s murmured demand.  

↪ Zoro once again proved to be a “dark” character with his dangerous request for ninja. In a way this is ironic, because it’s Law who has the epithet of Surgeon of Death - and asked about clone jutsu - while it’s Zoro who had macabre/deadly interests.

↪ Luffy, Chopper and Usopp may be the noisy fans but they were at least openly enthusiastic while Law and Zoro hardly showed any appreciation. Their faces shown in the bubbles speech contrast a lot with the happy smiles of Luffy and Usopp.

↪ Anime added a little moment when both, in a serious yet emotionless (threatening?) tone told the ninja to hurry up with showing them all his skills. That only added to the contrast between the happy trio and these two.

Raizo got angry at such treatment and explained to them that ninjas operate in darkness and do not show their skills just like that. Yet upon seeing depressed Luffy, Usopp and Chopper (in anime, Franky, Law and Zoro were visibly disappointed by that too), the man presented various techniques - including the one asked by Law and throwing shurikens. Anime expanded this scene and showed openly smiling Law and Zoro at Raizo’s performance.

↪ Once again, close to each other while keeping some distance from Luffy, Usopp and Chopper.

Whilst Robin was working to read the red poneglyph, the group separated for awhile: the samurais, Luffy, Chopper and Usopp went outside, to look at the city while the Mink Leaders, Nami, Brook, Franky, Zoro and Law waited inside the secret place. Despite their previously shown interest in ninja, Zoro and Law stayed with the more mature (adult) part of the group. Actually, Law’s choice to stay there is understable. The red stone could provide useful knowledge - albeit, did Law have any idea about the poneglyphs or the secret history is unsure. By staying, he ensured his chance to learn anything interesting in case Robin or Mink leaders decided to share something new. Zoro could have gone with the other group but for whatever reason, he stayed too.

Next part: Ninja-Pirate-Mink-Samurai Alliance

[gagmebucky]

this is, how you say, filthy? yeah, this is filthy.

anonymous asked: bucky w #38?? love you

“Really? ‘Cause I think we can, and we are,” he says with confidence that shouldn’t be so attractive. “You've been teasing me since the day you and my sister became friends.” Wrenching you forward, fabric loops around your waist, and he grinds the clothed erection against you. “You feel that, bunny? That’s all you.” 

(38.) “You’re not wearing anything under that, are you?” (includes best-friend’s-brother!bucky, dirty talk, unprotected sex, voyeurism/exhibitionism, multiple orgasms, overstimulation.)

do not repost.

—

There’s something about your best friend’s brother. 

Beyond the fact that he's got the whole gorgeous and reserved thing down—make you chase him when it should be the other way around—but it’s that he maintains a respectable reputation, the epitome of a true gentleman yet it’s the complete opposite.

And, you’re the only one who knows. No one realizes that James Buchanan Barnes is as silver tongued as he is a sweet talker.

“Hey,” you remember him addressing you on a particular morning after staying the night. The rest of the house was still slumbering, and you two were the only ones in the kitchen. A genuinely sweet expression contrasted hotly in your belly as he curiously inquired, “Have you given any thought to how good you’d look wrapped around my cock?” 

You were appalled, gasping a few steps back. Behind you, footsteps descending downstairs didn’t stop him from following you, and continuing innocently, “Or, on your knees with my big cock stuffed between your pretty lips?” Before you could respond appropriately aghast, your best friend was sluggishly ambling in, and he was gone and handing her a coffee like he deserved a brother of the year award.

How about the time you were checking your mail? 

Likewise, your next door neighbor had strolled over, leaning on your mailbox to tell you matter of factly, “I gotta say, I really appreciate how you leave the curtains open when you masturbate. A free show all for me.” It was prideful and self-satisfied that he invaded your privacy in that way. As you processed it, before you could deny such intent, he was whispering in your ear with wicked promise, “But, truthfully, given how fucking sexy you look, next time I’m taking it as an invitation.” 

Or, your personal favorite, in the middle of church. 

“Y’know, you ought to be ashamed of yourself,” he spoke lowly next to you as you lined up for communion. “Coming to church in a cockteasing dress like that,” he tsked, somehow managing to dance his fingers underneath the hem without anyone noticing. “I’m supposed to be worshiping God, not how fuckable your ass looks. I’ve got half a mind to take you over my lap, bunny.”

Just thinking about it sends shivers down your spine. There’s times where you doubt whether he uttered such vulgar language to you because everyone else insists and compliments how he’s a reputable and admirable man. But how true is that when he talks casually about fucking you until you can’t walk so you’ll have to stay on his cock.

It’s not like you can tell anyone; what are you gonna say? ‘Hi, yes, best friend? Your brother has been saying the most deplorable things to me, and it’s gotten to the point where I have to bring two pairs of panties when we hang out.’

And it isn’t like you want it to stop—you just want the ache to stop. Scratch that, you want the ache to be soothed. It’s become downright cruel. Whenever you hear his name, smell his cologne, think about him, you’re overwhelmed in licentious need. 

Seemingly innocent touches, secretive croons privately and publicly, that bastard thinks it’s funny when you’re breathing heavily, and people are wondering if you’re okay. You plan to wipe that smile off his face; you’re gonna beat him at his own game.

The annual family reunion is stationed in the Barnes backyard. The sun shines, the pool sparkles and barbecue smokes in the air, the blue-eyed brunettes laugh and catch up. As always, you’re invited, and you arrive in a short dress and no underwear, with a mindset rivaling his. 

Unintentional and chaste, you don’t mean to brush your ass against him; your dress rises unbeknownst to you in front of him as you pluck a flower; it’s pure happenstance your eyes connect with his amid suck-suck-sucking on a popsicle. 

His glare burning into you should warn you this is dangerous, but you still shoot him a bright smile before disappearing into his house. 

His sister, your best friend, has asked you to check inside for more seasoning, and the sweat gathering in your center is grateful for the break. You do feel some guilt for doing it behind her back, but a part of you argues it’s all his fault—he is the one who started it. 

So, you slip into the kitchen and force him from your mind. Mr. Barnes is running out of cayenne pepper and dried basil leaves, and you have the important task of retrieving the re-ups. With a hum, you walk past the granite island and push to your toes at the spice cabinet. The Barnes household has many, labeled similarly, in glass bottles in a swivel rotation. 

The sliding door opens and rattles behind you, but you don’t bother checking. You continue leisurely browsing the cabinet until your skin prickles with goosebumps and that baritone voice growls accusatory through the air, “You’re not wearing anything under that.” 

You spin, bracing your hands on the counter, and take in his unhinged form. The sight floods heat in your center at his icy blues, dilated black, sharp jaw defined by a clenching tick, the sexual frustration coiled in his broad form. 

“You’re not wearing anything under that,” he repeats with primal edge. “And you’ve been doing everything to make sure I know, and it’s driving me fucking crazy—exactly what you wanted.” 

A gasp falls from your lips. “James—” you attempt to begin your innocent act, but he’s not having it.

“Every chance you got, you were bending over so I could get a glimpse of that pretty pussy of yours,” he hisses, pushing forward with enclosing strides. “Flashing me like ‘don’t you wanna fuck me swollen and leaking your cum’?” 

His words sink in like fiery fangs, pumping electrifying heat into your veins. Your thighs instinctively press together when a roaring throbbing flares below. It worsens as he crowds you, your lower back careening into the counter while he towers over you. 

He grasps your throat, fingertips angling your jaw upward. “If you hadn’t left, I would’ve. You would’ve been wrapped around my cock in front of my whole family.” The grip tightens, blue eyes feral. “That excites you, doesn’t it, bunny? I bet you’d like it if I dragged you out there and showed everyone how fucking crazy you make me. How about it then?”

“J - James!” you moan, and you don’t mean to, your hands slapping over your mouth. “I - I don’t know what you’re talking about. I haven’t done anything!”

He chuckles, low and humorless. “No? The pure princess doesn’t know what I’m talking about?” he mocks, a wry smile as he asks with faux innocence, “So I guess that means you’re not wet?” 

You most definitely are, but you’d sooner diddle yourself in front of his family than admit it to him. You stick your nose up, as much as you can, and stammer an unconvincing, “Nn—n - no!” 

“Then what’s this?” Without warning, he’s shoving your dress up and slotting a calloused hand where you’re bare and drenched. “It’s a fucking waterfall down here, bunny. You’re dripping down your thighs, and you expect me to believe this little innocent charade?”

“Oh, God,” you whimper beneath the sinful knead of his fingers. You almost drop but he catches you with the hand that releases your throat. “You started it!” Your fists curl into his shirt for stability, yet your lips still stretch into a goading smile, never mind the fact you’re practically a puddle in his palm. “I - I hope everyone saw your hard on because it was so fucking obvious.” 

“Laugh it up, bunny,” he hisses in your ear while you moan at his fingertips encircling your clit, and he returns to span your jaw. Your gaze is fixed on him, deep depths glowing in authority. “‘Cause you’re the one who’s gonna fix it.”

He’s your best friend’s brother, and doing him is totally against girl code, right? It’s especially bad considering she’s right outside, and you’re in their kitchen for God’s sake. “We - we can’t, James,” you try but he’s rolling his thumb across your clit. “F - fuck!” 

“Really? ‘Cause I think we can, and we are,” he says with a confidence that shouldn’t be so attractive. “You've been teasing me since the day you and my sister became friends.” Wrenching you forward, fabric loops around your waist, and he grinds the clothed erection against you. “You feel that, bunny? That’s all you.” 

He’s huge, and you tremble with the last shred of common sense; laughter and loud talking drifting through the glass doors. There’s people outside, yards away, and you’re supposed to be doing something although it’s getting hard to focus on anything that isn’t him. “Everyone is outside. They could walk in—”

He laughs, only a twinge of humor is there. “I think we both know you want that.” For a moment, he releases you, going to undo his pants: solidifying you two will be doing this—doing each other. “Besides, you should’ve thought about that before.” 

A rush of adrenaline pairs with disbelief as your stomach dips. “You won’t do it,” you goad weakly, and, in a likewise manner, you stumble past him. Out of the corner of your eye, you spotted the label Cayenne sitting on the edge of the island counter. “All you do is talk because you don’t have the balls to actually—”

An arm hooks across your waist, pinning your back against his chest, and his hand tangles in your hair, twisting your head up and on his shoulder. “Is that right, bunny?” he growls. You can feel him positioning something hot and silky nuzzling your folds. “Say it again.” 

Throat bared, eyes on the ceiling, acutely aware the head of his cock is smearing wetness along your slit, you take his dare. “You won’t,” you breathe because you hope to God he will. 

With haste, he’s plunging forward and slamming you, bending over the cool counter in the process. An upheaval of blazing sensations besieges you as your pulsing channel clamps around the thickness. Something a hybrid of a gasp and shriek tears from your throat, and your hands smack for purchase at the granite edge. 

“Now, tell me again, I don’t have the—” His hips draw back then ram in until his balls are nestled against your clit. “Does that feel like you were right, bunny?” 

“Oh, God. J - James—Bucky,” you breathlessly moan. Your nipples are chafing through braless cotton. The mass settled in your stomach hurdles to half-mast after seconds of him inside you, and you writhe in search of forecasted relief. “You - you—you’re inside me. And, God, I - I need you to move.” 

His hands caress your ass then sharply crack down to send a shudder down your spine, channel spasming momentarily at the shot of pain, and your hips still in their wild rocking. His lips are grazing the curve of your neck, an infuriating quirk branding your skin. “Then you should apologize.”

“F - for?!” you splutter, astounded by his audacity. 

Another smack resounds against your left cheek, and his hold reaffirms against your scalp. “Taunting me all this time. With your hair flips, no bra so I can see your nipples and skimpy pajamas that’d rip so easily, walking around looking that good with no regard for how irresistible you are.” The praise has you twitching around him, and he practically purrs. “I’ve gotta say, you feel even better than I imagined, and trust me, I’ve been imagining.” 

“You started it—y - you started it!” you snap with a crack in your voice. “You should apologize to me.” With sexually frustrated spite simmering inside you, you clench and unclench your inner muscles around him, an effectively provoking act that has him moaning deep in his throat. 

“F - fuck!” he rasps. “That’s not fair, bunny, but if you want it, then you’ll fucking get it.” 

He wrenches your arms back, hooking his forearm at the junction of your elbows. In that position, he pulls you backward and forces an arch in your back. Then he’s driving into you brutally and reaching places you never knew you had.

The head of his cock is nudging over a raw spot repetitively. Each stroke burgeons with a fever, rising to overtake you in flames, and you quiver with every slap of your skin. Breathy sounds become louder, and his palm quiets you. 

“Out of all the ways, places to get my cock inside you, and you pick now?” he’s a breathy taunt. “When whoever can see? Do you want everyone to see how depraved I can get you? Huh, bun—”

Far away, your name rings out, the unmistakable voice of your best friend, then again, “Yo!” but this time it's much closer. It’s the third call, the silly stress of syllables only strides away, that the realization sets in, and fear of being caught strikes you. 

“Shit. My sister,” he mutters, a flicker of annoyance before he assures you, “If you think I’m gonna stop fucking you, you’re wrong, bunny.”

He frees your arms, and it allows you to stand somewhat straight. Your hands splay out on the counter, supporting yourself as he remains buried in you to the hilt. Smoothing down your dress, he gives the appearance he’s simply behind you, from the waist down hidden by the granite.

Just in time because the door slides out on a faltering call of, “Hey!” as your best friend spots you. Her vindicated smile turns questioning at the positioning, a thick and arched eyebrow raising. “Just wanted to know if you found the cayenne and basil,” she explains, confusion clouding, and you know she’s wondering why her brother is pressing against you like that. “What are you guys..?”

Possessing a coherency you can only marvel at, James is reaching beyond you to pluck the askew cutting board, knife and green leaves laying atop. “There’s no more basil so your little friend wanted me to teach her how to chop it up fresh,” he answers easily, a soothing tone unlike the primal one you’re used to. “You know, she’s just so cl - clumsy...” The maintenance of charm trips up when you purposely squeeze around his cock, a sense of satisfaction through you at the interrupted insult. 

“Y - yeah,” you speak up, hoping he hears your underlying delight, hoping the overlying will convince her. “The cayenne is right there. I - I’ll bring the basil out after we’re finished,” is your urging excuse because he’s throbbing hot inside you, and the pit in your stomach is pleading for release. 

“Okay—” she begins to say her goodbyes, but James slams his hands down on the counter, a rough motion that jolts you on his cock, and a low moan bubbles in your chest. 

“No, no. You can stay. This’ll only take a second,” he cuts in, an initial strain of his voice that levels out with secretive wickedness. “I want you to see how good she’s getting at this.” 

You hide your shock, trepidation at the continued pause and risk of your activities, and attempt a smile. Bastard. “O - okay,” you shakily agree. A part of you is surprised he might jeopardize his fasade while another isn’t when it’s at your expense.

His arms shadow around you, nonverbally directing you to pick up the chef’s knife, and you do. A calloused palm covers your hand, gently guiding the sharp blade up and down. 

It’d be cutely domestic if not for him trailing his other hand below; down underneath the hidden part of your dress, fingertips teasing your clit. The knife clatters as a shiver ripples through you. “I - I can’t do it,” you quickly say, doing your best to be apologetic. “Sorry.”

“I’ll do it,” your best friend volunteers, oblivious, taking the board to her side of the island. “It’ll be faster that way.”

“Yeah - yeah,” you nervously assent and shift your weight in hopes of deterring his tactful touch—it doesn’t. Instead, his caress heavies and three rough digits spiral around your bundle of nerves, and your stomach drops in anticipation with sparks spearing through you. 

You're not going to cum around his cock with his sister right there, you insist to yourself. You won’t, you refuse. Your hands encase around his flexing wrist, tugging to stop because the heat is ascending up your toes. 

“O - oh no,” you whisper because you might cum around his cock with his sister right there. Your nails dig into the smooth counter, juxtaposing to the calm demeanor you force upon yourself. Lasering your focus on chopping does nothing to distract from the clawing sensations inside you, a tremble weakening your knees, and attempts to wriggle away from the reactive touch are unsuccessful.

“J - James,” you hush underneath the loud and incessant chop of sterling on wood. “Not right h - here—”

“You started this,” he hisses quietly in your ear, and you can feel the smugness in the upped pace against your clit. “Now, you’re going to finish.”

“Okay. That’s done so,” you hear your best friend saying. “Let me just get this. And this. . .” Sweeping freshly minced basil onto a plate and picking up a half full bottle of red spice, she’s trekking off in the opposite direction without another look. “Keep chopping and bring it out here when you’re finished.” 

James’ hands clasps over your mouth, “James—!” as the inferno swallows you up. Your walls flutter tight, but his fingers keep going. It’s too much, and your legs are jelly. Thankfully, he’s catching you, and whisks you both down behind the kitchen island. 

“Oh my fucking God,” he groans behind you in reverse cowgirl, legs strewn about on wooden floors, huddled against the bottom row of cabinets. “You’re like a fucking vice when you cum.” With no regard for your sensitivity, he’s got his hands on your hips and bouncing you up and down. “It’s like being balls deep in my own slice of heaven.” 

“W - wait,” you gasp. Smarting shocks bite at your nerves as you struggle to handle the barrage of sensations brought on by the unrelenting pound of his thick and long cock. “James—I can’t—wait—”

“Wait?” he repeats, sounding equally amused and aghast at the prospect, an animalistic growl to his voice. “Oh, I’ve been waiting, and it’s been torture. Even worse now, knowing you’ve been holding out on me with this tight, little pussy.” 

The words physically hurt, a contradictory billow of pleasure intertwined with pain. You whimper, an involuntary reaction that snaps your bent legs shut.  

But only for a second because he’s breathlessly chuckling in your ear. “Nuh-uh. Nope, bunny. Not so fast.” He curls his ankles around yours and prises them wide open. “You’re gonna take my cock, and you’re gonna cum around me, again. It’s only fair.”

Your mind threatens to disconnect with your body because the reality is surreal. You can’t be in your best friend’s kitchen, with her supposedly honorable brother mercilessly fucking you through an orgasm where anyone can catch you. 

His hands are pawing at your dress, palming your tits and roughly massaging, pinching your pebbled nipples between his fingers. All the while, your thighs are spread wide, and his cock hammers in and out of you at a climbing rate.

Your hands smother your mouth, muffling shrieks and whimpers, as pain and pleasure surges through you. Ravaged completely, you squeeze your eyes shut and ride it out when everything swells excruciatingly. 

“Oh - oh, God...” you whimper and your hands flail out because you’re convinced you’re floating. “James—Bucky—please—”

“That’s right, bunny,” he coos in your ear, a new strength burrowing into you. “Beg. Sounds so pretty when you do.” His hand drops and takes advantage of your clit, fingers rubbing fiery static through you. “I said, beg, bunny. Beg me to cum inside you.” 

You shake your head but you’re already obeying. “Will you p - please cum inside me?” 

“Fucking finally,” he rasps and blasts you full of hot plasma, forearm anachoring you down to fill you up as deep as possible. It’s lighter fluid to another powerful orgasm, rippling across you into oblivion.

With a whimper of his name, all pleasure is wringed out of you, pain transitioning into bliss, eventually into numbness, aftershocks zapping you, residual contractions around him that have him groaning. 

It’s otherwise communicated as a cool down time, but the screech of a door gliding open rips that from you. “Hey?” your unaware best friend calls. “Buck?” 

“Oh no,” you whisper and somehow manage the strength to get up. Before popping into view, you blindly adjust your dress, ruffled with your nipples out due to unabashed fondling. Liquid is trailing down your inner thighs as you straighten. “H - hey. Just - just dropped something.”

Surprised but with no reason to assume you’re lying, she smiles and pads over. It dwindles into confusion, glancing at the un-chopped basil. “I thought you guys were...” The emotion increases as she realizes. “Where’s...” 

You feel eyes between your trembling knees, then fingers skimming along the wetness drenching you, and he finally springs beside you. “I was pretty sure we had another thing of dried basil in one of those bottom compartments,” he explains suavely, cool as a cucumber. “My mistake. I’m sorry.” He flashes a contrite look. “Let me do this quick—”

“No, no. You already do so much,” she insists and takes the duty from him. “You guys should enjoy the rest of the cookout.” 

“Oh. I think we’ve enjoyed it more than enough in here,” he says, a secretive quality only you can discern as always. While she hums in half hearted attention, he leans down and speaks to you lowly, “Fucked swollen and leaking my cum. Felt better and looks better than I ever thought. So, if you think I’m done with you, then, oh, bunny, you have no idea who I am.” 

[send feedback here / my masterlist here.]

[aspiringprofessionalnerd]

Wei Wuxian and the Trauma of the Burial Mounds

Sorry folks I am officially In My Feels after therapy this week, and then I came online this afternoon to see that @hunxi-guilai has knocked it out of the park with their analysis again. I love to see that people are talking about the portrayal of WWX’s trauma on a larger level, and I wanted to add my two cents:

Pre-Resurrection

First of all, I want to acknowledge that WWX is far from the only person who experiences trauma throughout the course of CQL ahem Jiang Cheng . Even WWX endures various types of trauma throughout his first life. But what I’m so impressed (and gutted) by is the way in which the show establishes that it is WWX’s first stint in the Burial Mounds specifically that breaks him (or, at least, catalyses his breakdown). 

We know WWX has had a difficult childhood and teen years. He lost his parents at a young age and had to survive on the streets for an unspecified amount of time, facing physical and logistical hardships like running from dogs and battling starvation (no cultivation training yet, so no opportunity to train inedia) as well as the grief of losing his parents. Yet, remarkably, aside from his lingering fear of dogs, these incidents don’t seem to leave too many lasting physical or emotional scars. WWX is able to jump around and play with his adoptive brother on his first night at Lotus Pier, and when we see him in his teen years at Cloud Recesses Summer Camp he is a warm, bubbly individual with no reservations about physical contact (on the contrary, he’s more gung-ho about it than LWJ would like). He remains open to new experiences and new people, and even though he uses humour to obfuscate at times, the people close to WWX can still see through to his deeper intentions (take, for example, Yanli reminding Jiang Cheng that WWX is serious about the important things). Moreover, once the Jiang siblings and WWX return to Lotus Pier, we gain a greater appreciation for the past things WWX has survived, including years of verbal abuse some awkward family dynamics. Madam Yu’s words obviously hurt him, but even so he bounces back almost immediately and diverts his attention to comforting Jiang Cheng despite the fact that he is still recovering from Teenage Mutant Murder Turtle injuries himself. I think there is an important distinction to be made here: it’s not that criticism and harsh conditions just roll off of WWX. He DOES process and internalise them, but he keeps going and maintains his faith and openness in spite of having these negative experiences. Clearly, he is a remarkably resilient person. 

After the massacre at Lotus Pier and Jiang Cheng’s loss of his golden core, we see WWX wrestle with more complex emotions: grief, guilt, and concern. It’s obvious that Wei Wuxian is suffering acutely, but he’s still doing it in a way that’s very true to his character as we know it. He’s crying. He’s seeking physical comfort from Yanli. He’s proactive, looking to plan and problem-solve. Yes he balks a little at what JC’s core recovery will involve, but his overall reaction is primarily one of satisfaction and relief. 

We don’t see too much of WWX between the mountaintop ordeal and his dropping into the Burial Mounds, but I think we have enough material to say that he is still in command of his own mind and maintains his sense of agency. You can tell that our Wee Sweaty Boi has been through the wringer, but he’s still quite animated and even cheeky when facing off against Wen Chao and Wen Zhuliu in the teahouse. That dog speech? Damn. Classic WWX. He might die, but he’s not going down without getting the last word. It’s only when they are all riding swords to the weirdest and most out of place glam rock score in the entire series wtf over the Burial Mounds that we see an inkling of genuine horror cross WWX’s face.

Take now, by contrast, WWX’s reactions and interactions post-Burial Mounds. His flinchy moments inspired such a visceral reaction in me. I’m a repeat trauma survivor as well, and when I saw the way that WWX jerked back from NHS’s hand, it was deeply uncomfortable to watch precisely because of how familiar it was. This is an instinctive, almost animalistic response to touch, and it’s a FEAR response. Moreover, this isn’t some rando about to bump into him; this is one of his best friends from childhood. This is the reaction of someone who has survived by believing that the only possible safe space he has is within the confines of his own body; if anyone touches that, it will shatter. Wei Wuxian’s logical mind can tell him that NHS is not a threat, but his trauma-brain can’t turn off the panic simply by knowing that. (And why should he trust his logical mind, anyway? As we get glimpses of in the first few moments of the Burial Mounds, it’s as much the voices of people he knows and loves as the voices of unnamed resentful souls that prey on him during those three months. The psychological trauma in the Burial Mounds was not just the introduction of external threats, but the convoluting of things WWX knew and loved into instruments of torture so that even once he returned to the world, he could not shake those negative associations.)

We get an equal-but-opposite illustration of WWX’s trauma in instances like his reunion with JC and LWJ or his soup session with Yanli. There’s a deadness behind the eyes, an uncanny stillness. Wei Wuxian is in survival mode, going through the motions of what ‘should’ be his return to normal life but wondering why it doesn’t feel right this time. Wei Wuxian had told himself in the Burial Mounds that all he needed to do was survive the Burial Mounds themselves and then everything would be alright: he would go back to Lotus Pier, JC would be healed, and he would make up a new version of the plan that had been shot to hell (I’m convinced that WWX DID originally have a plan for how to navigate life in Lotus Pier post-golden core; however, he never got to put that plan into place because he got dumped into the Burial Mounds before he could enact it). But Wei Wuxian returns, and what he’s told himself isn’t true, because in all his planning for returning to Yunmeng he didn’t account for the fact that what it took to get there would fundamentally alter him. As a result, Wei Wuxian doesn’t fit anymore--not because the world has changed, but because Wei Wuxian has changed. And he can’t talk about that with anyone.

Why not? Sure, in part it’s because he feels bound to keep the secret about Jiang Cheng, but I think there’s another aspect here that’s been significantly overlooked: namely, that Wei Wuxian is the ONLY person to survive the Burial Mounds in any kind of living cultural memory. The problem isn’t so much that he can’t tell people as it is an issue of no one being able to understand or relate to his experiences even if he did share them. After all, how do you convey to an outsider what it was like to survive for three months in a place where every single bit of torture was customised to draw on YOUR individual, personal fears and hurts? Significantly, this is also the point in the story where we see Wei Wuxian begin to answer questions by in turn asking, ‘Would you believe me if I told you...?’ The question is rhetorical: he doesn’t expect people to believe him (although it still hurts when they don’t), but even if they do believe, it’s still not enough because they don’t understand. IMO, the rest of WWX’s issues leading up to the cliff at Nightless City stem from him trying--and failing--to come to terms with the loneliness of that knowledge.

Post-Resurrection

After WWX comes back, we see a shift in him. He’s no longer focused on the fact that no one will understand him; he’s decided that having someone (namely LWJ) believe him is enough. This resolves many of the auxiliary issues that had been plaguing WWX before his death, but it does NOT resolve the original trauma of his first experience in the Burial Mounds. WWX continues to have nightmares, and what are they about? Not Lotus Pier. Not Qiongqi Way and his sense of guilt. Not Shijie getting stabbed right in front of his face. Not his final, distraught moments with LWJ and JC. Nope, his nightmares continue to revolve around falling into the Burial Mounds all those years ago: an experience for which even death and rebirth are insufficient to ease the pain. 

I’m convinced that even at the end of CQL Wei Wuxian still has a LOT of healing to do, and I think this healing is not something that can happen through Lan Zhan’s love alone. Thank goodness for fanfic and headcanons, eh?

**Gentle reader, this turned out to be more like 50 dollars than two cents. Thank you for reading to the end if you’re still with me!

TL;DR I believe Wei Wuxian’s turning point moment in the story is his dumping into the Burial Mounds. It’s easy to get swept up in how many terrible things happen to him AFTER that in the lead-up to Nightless City, but I genuinely think he could have endured the loss of his Jiang family, the censure of LWJ, and society turning against him if he had not been psychologically broken during his first three months there. The writers, directors, and Xiao Zhan give us a very raw, real version of what trauma looks like with their depiction of post-Burial Mounds WWX, and it is utterly harrowing.

[no6secretsanta]

Day off.

Hey, it’s me, Apricot! I was so happy when I received the e-mail that you were my giftie @marykedoesart . I hope you like it!! <3

(from ApricotMori_ (twitter))

- Oh, boys! It’s such a shame you have to go, but don’t forget to come back soon, alright, Shion? And Nezumi…

- Yes, madam? 

- I know how happy you make my son and that brings me joy all the time, but that doesn’t mean you can’t hurt me… Stop buying those muffins near your home and come visit me. I’ll give you fresher ones for free, alright? 

Karan’s voice was sweet and caring, filled with that tender mother-like tone she has always had. Yet there was a little drop of anger noise between those words. She was smiling widely, her eyes were hidden by the curvature on her lips, and she was caressing Nezumi’s cheek. However… Shion was aware of how those words pierced Nezumi’s cool mask and shattered it.

That’s how her mother was like, a kindhearted woman, but also a strong one who would not accept anything but the best for those she appreciated dearly. And, yes, her muffins were the best around the city, and, yes, she appreciated Nezumi a lot. Shion would sometimes joke about how she just quitted on being his mother, because she put Nezumi under her wing. How could she take for granted that he tasted somebody else’s muffins?

“Elyurias was scary, but your mother has some guts”, Nezumi once admitted to Shion, so Shion couldn’t help but laugh at the image exposed right in front of his eyes.

Nezumi’s façade was somber and he was frightened because he couldn’t just play a stage to run away; Karan knew him better. She would immediately perceive it. 

- Mom, it’s been my fault. He never eats them, it’s me who asks him to go and buy some when I have to work until midnight… Stop scaring him.

- Oh! So Nezumi, are my muffins still your favorite ones?

- Of course, my dearest lady. They always have been and they always will be.

Nezumi bent down with his right palm against his chest, as elegant as someone from the realms.

He never lied; it was nothing else, but the truth. He wasn’t picky with food, but when it came to muffins that weren’t Karan’s, he would find all the excuses: too dry or not sweet enough, or whatever else. Those were the only exception.

They shared their farewells. The two boys started walking downhill with paper bags full of bread and Nezumi’s favorite desserts. The food was fresh, the smell was soothing, and it was still warm, so the bags felt nice against their torsos. It contrasted perfectly with the night that was starting to fall over them. As it grew darker, people would come back to their homes to get dinner, so the streets were kind of lonely except for the two figures that were walking and talking something unimportant, but still could steal some laughter; once or twice.

- If Your Majesty wants to, there’s no way this faithful servant could stop him… But, for real, Shion, the last time that didn’t turn out well. 

- I’m not sixteen anymore… Besides, if I start rubbing my nose with yours again, you can now just kiss me.

- Hmph.

Nezumi smirked. “Who has given so much confidence to this hopeless idiot?” he thought while grabbing Shion’s paper bags.

A bell announced Shion’s arrival to the liquor store, an item a little too classic for that kind of business, but it was good that some places still had those old rarities.

The city that once existed inside big walls was no longer there. It turned out way better than Nezumi could have expected. It grew at a record rate and now tall buildings full of better and eco-friendly technology stood there. Poverty was a word that couldn’t be used; everyone could afford to cover all their necessities without any class distinctions. People were able to choose their path and chase after their dreams out of government influence. 

After so many years, people that were from West Block and people that were from No. 6 had come to understand each other’s destinies. None of the citizens arbitrarily decided nor pulled the trigger of the lives each had to endure. It was all government faults and it had been clarified, cleaned, and restructured.

Forgiveness came; hatred and revenge was something from the past. When Nezumi first stepped into No. 6, he inhaled deeply; the fragrance of freedom, the sense of safety, and the vibes of certainty. It invaded him like air inside his lungs.

After more than 12 years later from that step, he still felt the same way. It was good. No, it was beyond good. Not the city conditions precisely, but to trust and rely on someone and received foremost from that someone. What a lesson life had given him. No. Nezumi didn’t believe in destiny or faith, the lesson was given by no one else, but Shion. 

He still could only trust and rely only on Shion, and even if there was only one person to trust, Nezumi could also come with some more forgiveness about his past choices.

- Nezumi, mmh, why are you smiling so peacefully? 

Shion came out with bottles of what seemed to be grape juice, but it was wine; the cheapest kind. He couldn’t be entrusted to do that task because he would go in and buy the one already known. Shion only had alcohol at West Block, that particular day, next to Nezumi. None of them had money to waste, so they accepted Rikiga’s gift: the cheapest wine and also the only one that could be found on those God forgotten streets. 

Shion had opportunities to learn the names of other types and brands of alcohol at some fancy reunions he was invited to, but he didn’t try them. Not once. He wanted to preserve the flavor from the one that tasted like treasured memories.

- You’re starting to lose your sight sense. You are not getting any younger, Shion. You should go to the doctor to do a checkup.

- Hahaha. We are the same age, Nez-

- Whatever. Give me that bag, your doll prince hands will tear.

- I no longer have those hands. Don’t be silly, Nezumi. Better use your free hand to hold mine.

- Mngh… Gotcha, prince.

Shion found that abrupt answer: weird. It did not matter how pierced Nezumi’s tongue was, he would always let Shion speaks before giving a comeback. However, even if it was weird Nezumi was smiling so relaxed and he seemed to be lost in his thoughts. It had to mean he was letting himself be comfortable around the idea surrounding his mind. It was a good sign.

Nezumi still has a hard time putting his guard down, but he’s been able to do it lately, and that was what mattered… But still was an opportunity for Shion to tease him a little bit.

- Maybe you were thinking of me. 

- You think too highly of yourself.

- I’ve learned from the best.

- You’re a fast learner with theory, but not an accurate one with practice.

- Remember your words, Nezumi.

- I always do.

They arrived home.

A small mouse, black and fast, had given his welcome and earned a piece of bread… There was no way that tiny friend would let Shion or Nezumi step inside if they didn’t greet him with some treat first. Maybe that little mouse stayed next to Shion just to have a life free pass to try what Cravat always did when delivering the letters back on the days they lived at the bunker.

- You spoiled him. Such an obedient mouse turned into a brat at the hands of another brat. What a tragedy!

 Nezumi said and put everything in their kitchen while Shion took a bath. Later they just changed roles. 

“They were still in the happier stage of love. They were full of brave illusions, so that the communion of self with self seemed to be on a plane where no other human relations mattered”

“I don’t ask you to love me always like this, but I ask you to remember. Somewhere inside of me there will always be the person I am tonight”.

- Tender is the night, F. Scott Fitzgerald

- Remind me again why are we reading this book? When we finish it, you will be crying like a little girl.

- I don’t care. I pretty much just like listening to you.

- What am I going to do with that cheesy mouth of yours?

- I have some ideas, but we can discuss them later when we go to bed.

- Mmnh, mmnh.

- … And I wanted you to listen to that quote.

- You still are an airhead, jeez. Shion, we’re not 16 anymore. Shion, you’ve changed. And so did I. We became more mature; more adult-like. But your naive essence remains the same… Pretty much. Quite impressive if you ask me.

- Hey! That was meant to be cute all the way.

Nezumi was absolutely teasing him, having his small revenge for a couple of hours ago. He was more than charmed by Shion’s idea to spend the night. And… the cheesy mouth had been cute all the way. Yes. Nezumi still has a hard time taking sweet actions, but he, at least, could acknowledge them. Specially when they came from his unique airhead: Shion.

With a smile on his face and his body stuffed with good humor, he filled two cups with the crimson liquor and gave one to Shion.

- Yeah, yeah. Look if you try to bite me just once, this wine will end up as your personal hair dye.

- This hair you love so much? 

- You’re right. Your pastel yellow pajama pants will be, then. Why do you have such a bad sense of fashion anyway?

- I don’t know, probably because I have no eyes for anything that is not you.

- For real, Shion? Are you trying to flirt with me that way? Tsk, tsk, it’s worse than Shakespeare.

- It still is the truth. 

- Hopeless.

- …ly in love.

- Oh, shut up! You’re scaring Tsukiyo.

Contrary to his words, the mouse was having a good time with a few more pieces of bread. Tsukiyo cheep cheep-ed and it sent the two boys into a burst of hysterical laughter.

They hadn’t even tasted the wine, and they were already having a good time. 

They wanted to remember something tasted and shared more than 12 years ago. Something that, at the time, brought them eases and some sort of comfort from everything that had been going on, and they succeeded. They succeeded at being two dorky teenagers when they deserved it. They teased each other, they fell on the floor and they laughed when life wasn’t being any good. By that time, alcohol was a small escape, more like an excuse because it was not the way to; kind of an accessory. By this time, as accessories just decor, wine was again unnecessary. It also turned out it wasn’t to their liking. The two cups just cooled down at the table when Nezumi thought of something that also made the two of them happy back on those days.

A dance.

With the widest smile, Nezumi took Shion and pulled him closer. Just like that day, Nezumi had a crave to feel Shion’s warmth against his. 

- Let’s see how much your Majesty has improved.

- …

Shion wanted to say he never danced again after that day, but once again, as it always happens, he got lost in the pair of grey eyes that looked deeply into him.

After so much time spent together, Shion could, at least, recognize his silly grin and react differently than just standing there thunderstruck and unable to move.

Their feet waltzed around. Nezumi’s movement was elegant and even more precise than when they were 16 years old, and something melted inside Shion’s heart.  “On his travels… he danced. There were times he was so carefree he would just… dance”.

Shion giggled and let the sudden twirls of his heart guided his steps. They had no music. The only rythm heard was their foot stepping here and there, Nezumi’s one, two, three, and Shion’s silly laughter.

- What is it, my stubborn child? Tell me so I can laugh with you. - It’s nothing, Nezumi. You’ve become better at this and I haven’t. That’s it. - I wouldn’t say that. I’m quite impressed by his Majesty’s performance. And Nezumi did start laughing at the unison with Shion. It was so easy to be together, so easy to enjoy their presences, to be gentle and kind to each other.

Nezumi’s heart was also melting while dancing. For similar, yet, somehow, different reasons. He was feeling some sort of happiness. There was still a long way for him to go through, but after so many years of hatred and guilt, he had slowly learned to move on from the darkness and let the light come into his life.

It was such a ridiculous way to explain it, but Nezumi couldn’t help it. Some things are just the way they are… and it was the most accurate way to express the process he accidentally went through on his travel.

He left for the sake of running away from a tumult of overwhelming feelings and as an unexpected consequence: he freed himself from chains that were holding him, blinding him and pining him down as some kind of martyr.

He wasn’t a martyr anymore. He deserved to make his own life choices and enjoy new experiences… He called it hope and hope brought him freedom.

Freedom brought him back to Shion.

Shion had also changed. At first glance, Shion would look like he had been sharpened by a knife, but then he would smile and make the whole world stop for a while. He turned calculative, strong, determined and even ambitious, but he was still the warm human being Nezumi met at 12 years old, he was still the warm human being who came back from hell.

Shion never lost his humanity. He found a meaning to this world while restructuring the city. A meaning he told Nezumi would rather keep to himself.

It was fine that way for Nezumi. But sometimes he would just wonder… or maybe he was just projecting his discoveries onto Shion: Shion also found freedom.

Maybe he wanted to experience all the shapes and shades of humanity that were attached to this lifetime. 

- Would you life to travel this time with me?

- I’d love to.

Maybe such an intense, expansive, and complex experience was a good starting point to approach all the variating tones of life. Nezumi once had a taste.

-… and I love you.

- Shion you keep on being so cheesy.

-…

- But I love you too.

And as Fitzgerald would agree, even if the way they loved each other had changed, changed or would change, they’ll remember that somewhere inside of them they would always be the same as they were when they met… when they saved each other’s life and when they drifted apart, and, of course, when reunion came.

[pynkhues]

I just want Beth to be like, fuck boomer. How can she be so forgiving for everything he did to her and Annie?

I’ve only watched the episode once at this stage, anon, but the impression I got was that she did say ‘fuck Boomer’, and that she wasn’t forgiving of him at all. As soon as she saw him pop out of the septic tank, she knew what Rio was asking, and she never wavered in delivering him, which is huge, huge growth for Beth (and Annie and Ruby too). I’d argue too that trying to take him to Marion was smattered with three very different sets of motivations.

Annie was doing it for Marion.

Beth was doing it for Annie.

And Ruby was doing it for Beth. 

None of them were doing it for Boomer.

Overall though, I think this episode marked a really substantive growth in terms of Beth’s handling of a rotten egg, and that it represented a natural evolution from the horror of what happened to Lucy, and the initial disaster of her handling of the Boomer situation in the early parts of s2, in a way that felt true to her character and true to her moral descent, which is less a plummet off a cliff, than it is a stagger down the stairs. 

So let’s break that down a bit:

Annie + Boomer + Beth

The first real scene of violence (as opposed to threatened or inferred violence) on this show is actually through Annie, Boomer and Beth. 

He tries to rape Annie, and Beth first holds a toy gun on him, and then smashes a bottle over his head.

This scene is a really clear precursor to what happens later in the series, but also a very distinct character set-up for Beth, because it shows that she thinks quickly on her feet, will protect her and hers (aka Annie and Ruby), doesn’t think things through (was there ever a plan of what to do with Boomer in the treehouse?) and has a lot of barely contained rage, simmering beneath the surface of her. 

Beth + Rio + Dean

In a lot of ways, that barely contained rage manifests with Beth getting Rio arrested, an act motivated out of a conflicting cocktail of fear, anger, vindictiveness, and - as I’ve argued on here before - genuine hurt. The scene at the end of 1.10 is such a good cliffhanger, and they explode that cliffhanger back open with 2.01. 

Rio gives her the gun, manipulates Beth’s trust, and then uses that trust as a weapon against Beth to get her to willingly give him back the gun as he shoots Dean. 

It’s a scene that punctuates Rio’s ability to do what Beth can’t.

The Girls + Boomer

And yet, for Rio, that immediately seems to build into a desire to get her to do it. 

He’s just shot her husband, and now he’s strongarming, goading, and - in 2.04 - positively gleeful at the prospect of getting her to shoot someone too.

Boomer is really the first person who’s framed as a dead man walking on this show, and by the time the show articulates that explicitly in 2.01, it comes with a loaded, complex history. Boomer’s Annie’s boss, her would-be rapist, and now the fiance of their sort-of-employee? It’s a mess from the word go, and it falls out as a mess because Rio’s overshot, because Beth isn’t ready. 

That whole mess just falls out and falls out and falls out across season 2, until it culminates in: 

The Loft

Which not only parallels with 1.10/2.01, but also the Boomer arc. 

Rio gives Beth Turner as a gift, a lesson, and a punishment combined, and once again, Beth isn’t ready for any of it. 

It compounding with the games and then the abandonment and then the kidnapping, means Beth shoots the wrong person in a way that calls back to 1.01. It’s an explosion of desperation and then an ill-thought out rage that resets the board for s3.

Season 3

In a lot of ways, Rio’s taken a step back from Beth this season, and I think in no small part, that that’s manifested in his desire to see Beth get her hands dirty. That desire is absolutely still there, but he’s downloaded a lesson plan, and he’s pivoted his approach. 

Now, it isn’t about getting a gun in her hands, it’s about making her complicit with the gun in his. 

Beth + Rio

This is really started in 3.02/3.03 with their reunion, and the extension of the shift in violence in their relationship which was escalated in 2.13. 

Namely though, it reiterates a set of rules that haven’t always appeared so plainly, but have certainly underpinned many of their interactions. 

1. The gun is in Rio’s hands and he makes sure she knows that it’s there (he tells her he’s planning on killing her). 

2. Beth scrambles to save someone (in this case herself through the pregnancy lie).

3. She plays along (she goes to the OBGYN with him).

4. She tries to negotiate (their whole conversation at the bar in 3.04)

5. She suffers the consequences (lets him strongarm into her business.) 

And then it escalates.

Beth + Lucy

I’ve talked about it before, but Lucy’s death was a marked shift for the show, because it wasn’t about making Beth do it, it was about making her complicit in the crime. 

Again, it follows a formula, albeit this time, not over two episodes. It’s in a handful of scenes.

1. The gun is in Rio’s handsand he makes sure Beth knows that it’s there (he presents as a clear and obvious danger to Lucy, echoes language he’s used with Beth when trying to kill her to emphasise his intentions. I talked about this a lot in the post I linked to above).

2. Beth scrambles to save someone (she tries to tell Lucy not to finish the new template.)

3. She plays along (she goes out to the van with Rio and his guys).

4. She tries to negotiate (passionately this time! But - notably - for herself, Annie and Ruby first, Lucy second - her first moral slip in this particular sense). 

5. She suffers the consequences (Lucy’s killed).

It’s a stark contrast to 2.01, because Dean survived, and an even starker one to all of the other scenes of violence on this show so far, because Lucy was an innocent, unlike Dean, Boomer and Rio.

Hell, she’s even unlike Annie and Mary-Pat, who have both experienced awful sexual violence in this series at Boomer’s hands. There is no situation ever in which any person deserves that or invites it; however, in talking about the violence on this show, it’s important to acknowledge not only their respective traumas, but the way they play as morally grey characters in the storyworld versus Lucy, who was never presented to us as anything other than ‘good’. 

The brief foray between Beth, Max and Rio that falls out of it forms a compelling, but short-lived exploration of the ramifications to this, and is in no small terms about highlighting two things. a) Beth has never been as innocent as Max, who wets himself in the heat of the moment, and b) that she’s stumbled down a few stairs in terms of what she can do, while c) still letting her guilt guide her course of action. 

Beth + Boomer

Which is why this episode was, in practically every way, an escalation of what Beth’s capable of, even if it did perhaps feel like it wasn’t. 

1. The gun is in Rio’s hands (a fact Beth instantly accepts when Boomer pops out of the septic tank). 

2. Beth doesn’t scramble to save him. At all. This is huge for her and a really, really marked shift in terms of her character. Like I said at the start of this post, everything she did in this episode was for Annie’s benefit, not for Boomer’s, but I’ll come back to that in a tick. 

3. She plays along, but it’s different this time. She’s both falling into line, while creating her own space. Yes. She’s going to bring Rio Boomer. But she also might need more time within that, and she’ll fight for that when it’s for her sister (taking Boomer to say goodbye to Marion), but she won’t when it’s for Boomer himself at their expense (she’ll steal away the urn and threaten to throw it away when it’s too much). Beth bossed up in a big way. Not in a pretty way, sure, and not in a way that perhaps immediately presented as empowering, but it was  - she did what needed to be done to deliver, not just play along.

4. This is why I think Beth’s negotiation here was important and needed to be in there. The shift in her own morality in this episode has been both a logical evolution of the series and a really stark one. She needed to know she tried, and it’s no accident that her brief, half-hearted efforts at negotiating for Boomer’s life with Rio came after Boomer was appealing to Annie again, and again, and again, and again in that car. 

We’ve seen what Beth’s like when she’s fighting for a life. 

She wasn’t fighting for Boomer. 

If anything, she was providing the most base of comforts to her sister, and likely herself too. 

They tried.

5. She suffers the consequences. She doesn’t fight it. She doesn’t spring from the car, or start her filibuster like she usually would. Which means she doesn’t just suffer Boomer’s death. 

For the first time in the series, she accepts it. 

And she lets it go. 

And sure, maybe it’s not a fuck you, but for Beth? The woman who can’t even divorce her husband? I think that’s pretty huge. 

I also think that the end of the episode where Annie tried to give peace to Marion just reiterated how much this episode was about her for Annie, not about Boomer (which is why it’s also important that the show reminded us that Marion was racist, and that she chose Boomer over Annie anyway, which I really appreciated). 

And going off that final montage? None of them mourned him like they did Lucy, which, well. Says a lot, particularly when paralleled with their respective guilt spirals in 2.04 after disposing of Boomer the first time.