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I’m feelings, so gonna just talk about how important the Voice of the Cold is to me as a low-empathy person who most definitely also has alexythimia (struggle to identify emotions on yourself and on others).
(this’ll probably get very rambly and a bit personal, so be warned)
Like– do you have any idea how it is to grow up like this? People will look at your face, expecting it’ll tell them something, and then getting unnerved/uncomfortable when they come out with nothing. Being constantly told how weird you look. Asked if you’re mad or sad when you literally not even in this world anymore. Constantly being told how your words (blunt in their honesty) hurt others.
Standing in a funeral, everyone around you is crying or just looking vaguely sad, and you feel left out, or even guilty, because all you feel is annoyance and discomfort and you want nothing more than to leave.
Constantly seeing in movies– killers are unfeeling and uncaring. Monsters are like that because they don’t have empathy. The flat-faced, monotone character being presented as a weirdo till their shown “the power of love”.
And you see yourself in those characters, and you get those characters, but they’re the bad guys, they’re the ones in need of changing. Are you the bad guy? Do you need changing?
So you try. You hyperfixate on psychology and the functioning of emotions. You try to understand those around you. You try to be someone fun, someone they’ll see as ‘good’, you try to sound more emotional than you actually are. So that you can separate yourself from the image of that unfeeling bad guy.
(It doesn’t matter if it hurts your face. It doesn’t matter if the words aren’t natural. It doesn’t matter if when alone in your bed, you’ll cry yourself to sleep from the exhaustion of it all).
You get tired of it. And the few drops of care about being seen as a bad person leaks out as the mask cracks. You don’t care anymore, you just want everyone to leave you the fuck alone.
You’re alone. You try to understand yourself. You try to be kinder to yourself. You try to build a persona that’s more comfortable and true to what you really are.
An unfeeling monster Someone with a fizzled connection to their own body’s emotions.
An uncaring asshole Someone who needs to go through several logical analysis if they want to understand someone else’s emotions.
And you’re fine with that. You learn to be fine with that. You learn which form of expressions doesn’t hurt you, and which ones you just shouldn’t force yourself through. You learn your honesty can lift others up and not just put them down. You learn how to be there for friends, and when to pull away when it becomes too much. A part of you will always feel alone, but you learn to be ok with that too.
And when you see this part of yourself portrayed so masterfully, with all its strengths and weaknesses in full display, and with a understanding you never saw before, you feel like crying and jumping from joy (and you do, because those forms of expression don’t hurt as much anymore).
#somehow. this completely derailed from being about Cold to this prose-y thing lol#Prose is the easiest way for me to express myself so–#slay the princess#voice of the cold#Sal Writes#Sal Rambles#(since it’s both)
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Dreaming of the Perfect Tan Summer Sportcoat
I don’t know what it is about a tan summer suit or sportcoat, but even when I was a teenager I liked how it looked. One of the first suits my parents bought for me when I was old enough to be part of the buying process was a shade of tan (though in a gabardine wool or something). And looking back, I think I’ve bought, worn and sold around 10 different tan jackets—all looking for the perfect one. Unfortunately the fashion cycle that makes certain color hues popular have just not been on my side this past decade. Usually there’s something about the color of the tan that turns me off—sometimes it’s too yellow, sometimes it’s too beige. Sometimes the fabric isn’t great or the style details aren’t to my liking. I think I’ve explored most of the different variations that you can in this realm. Read on for an overview of those, and at the end are links to the long list of great looking tan sport coats and suits this season from my favorite retailers.
Cotton khaki twill
The easiest to ones to find are unstructured and made in cotton twill fabric like you’d find on chinos. Ralph Lauren, Brooks Brothers, J.Crew all make them. In fact two of the first ones I bought were cotton jackets like this. They can be a slightly more dressed up alternative to a lightweight jacket, but as a warm-weather fabric, the dense twill is not your friend. That said, since they exist on the casual end, they’re easy to throw on and look good with jeans, and even just a t-shirt underneath.
A J.Crew khaki jacket, Obidos, Portugal, 2010
Cotton suiting
Cotton suiting is also a route I explored, and in fact that was my very first foray into this realm. In 2008 I bought a cotton sateen stretch suit from Express, which I wore for a few years, including at my university graduation. Today, I’d avoid the sheen of something like that and go for Drake’s in cotton drill, which is another twill. It’s not going to keep you very cool in the hottest, most humid temps, but on the flip side it can be worn in the cold months and still look good. Drake’s creative director Michael Hill wears their cotton drill suits, and favors them because they gain so much character after lots of wear, much like a pair of raw jeans do. Other brands like Brooks Brothers, Southwick, Hickey Freeman, and Samuelsohn make tan cotton suits, too, in poplin. But of course, I prefer the style and design of the European makers.
Express cotton sateen stretch tan suit, 2009
Pure linen
Linen is the natural summer fabric choice for something like this, for those who embrace the wrinkles it brings. Heavier Irish linen has a better drape than lightweight linen like most Italian mills make, but almost defeats the purpose of linen if your intent is to have something that wears cool in the heat. Either way, a broken in wrinkled tan linen sportcoat is an awesome thing. Worn with pale blue shirt and white or off-white trousers, you can’t go wrong. I’ve never owned a pure linen jacket myself, though I almost pulled the trigger on one last season from Spier & Mackay in a light brown glen plaid fabric.
Spier & Mackay light brown linen jacket I tried but returned, 2020
Linen blends
I have, however, owned one in a linen blend, which is probably the best way to go. Wool-silk-linen is a fairly typical blend of fabrics that helps even out the wrinkle of the linen fibers while also adding visual texture all its own. One such sportcoat I had that I felt was just about the perfect color was from PoLo Ralph Lauren (I ultimately sold it because I preferred the design and styling of other makers). There’s also just a plain wool-linen, like the gorgeous and perfect Sartoria Carrara jacket at No Man Walks Alone made in a Marling & Evans cloth from last year.
Linen-blend Polo Ralph Lauren tan jacket, Southern California 2014
The most recent tan jacket I owned looked like a linen blend but was in fact something different: hemp and wool. After buying and reselling time after time and feeling neurotic about it, a few years ago I just decided to buy something and accept it. I wore it a few years but ultimately, the beige color just wasn’t my favorite. Actually I owned two different hemp jackets over the years; I’d owned then sold an earlier, chunkier fabric that was much more “greige” and was 100% hemp, which I was dissatisfied with the length of back in 2015.
Chunky hemp Eidos jacket, 2015
Finer-weave hemp-wool blend Eidos jacket, 2018
This season’s outstanding crop of tan jackets and suits
This season it’s like every shop I normally buy from has a tan jacket in a beautiful, just-about-right color. When it rains, it pours! Where were all these 5 years ago?!
That previously mentioned No Man Walks Alone x Carrara jacket is the top choice right now (though it’s sold out in nearly every size at this point).
My new favorite entry-level tailoring shop Natalino has a pure linen jacket in what they call “rope” that looks very appealing in the studio photos.
Drake’s is also carrying pure linen suit separates in a warm shade of tan that feels just right.
The other stand-by’s for entry-level Suitsupply and Spier & Mackay typically do something in an attractive shade of tan or light brown each year, this year being no exception. Spier’s is a linen-wool blend jacket in a lighter tan called “sand.” Suitsupply’s best offering is a light tan in an unstructured model.
The Armoury has a wonderful linen herringbone jacket (albeit in their ventless Model 12).
They also have an all-silk hopsack cloth tan jacket in their Model 3 that looks really great.
Anglo-Italian has a slightly darker tan linen herringbone in their excellent single breasted model, as well as a khaki suit.
Polo Ralph Lauren has a 3-piece suit separate in plain cotton stretch, and a jacket in a bizarro stretch fabric combo that nonetheless looks pretty good.
How about you? Does the tan summer sportcoat hold such a powerful sway over you as it does me? Let me know in the comments below! And which of the ones I linked is your favorite?
(Help support this site! If you buy stuff through my links, your clicks and purchases earn me a commission from many of the retailers I feature, and it helps me sustain this site—as well as my menswear habit ;-) Thanks!)
If you’re just getting into tailored menswear and want a single helpful guide to building a trend-proof wardrobe, buy my eBook. It’s only $5 and covers wardrobe essentials for any guy who wants to look cool, feel cool and make a good impression. Formatted for your phone or computer/iPad so it’s not annoying to read, and it’s full of pretty pictures, not just boring prose. Buy it here.
Eidos wool solaro suit jacket I tried on in a shop and was desperately tempted by, 2017
Honey brown Eidos jacket in a super lightweight wool/silk/linen. The color of this jacket was a mistake (the factory mixed up which fabric the coats were supposed to be made in). I might’ve bought it, but my size sold out and the next size up, pictured, was just too big. 2017
Eidos beige with teal overcheck jacket in wool/silk/linen. Eidos always tended greige with their beige/tans, and I just never loved it. I sold this later. 2017
Catch and release D’Avenza jacket in a cotton blend of some kind I tried on via eBay.
This Polo Ralph Lauren wool/silk/linen jacket is probably the ideal color; I sold it only because I was starting to ramp up Italian jackets from Eidos. 2014
Totally unstructured Brooks Brothers tan canvas jacket that fit terribly in the shoulders. 2013
Read more at Menswear Musings
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I'm so frustrated bcs I think I dont have the capability of eloquently expressing myself, my sentences always comes out too short or too long for my liking.
Whether in writing or in speaking, give yourself permission to fuck up. To sound silly, or stupid, or to miss the point, to be long winded, to trip over your words. Communication is an inexact science, we're all learning all the time. I have a hard time with face-to-face communication, always have—my mind runs a hundred times faster than my mouth can keep up with. It's taken me years, and years, and years to go from being mostly nonverbal for all of my teenage years, to now sometimes being treated to the compliment that I am capable of being quite eloquent. Talk to yourself aloud, have whole conversations with yourself. If you're writing, always read it back to yourself aloud, this is SOOOO crucial to identifying if you've got the tone, timing, and cadence you're aiming for. And just keep doing it, keep fucking up, until the day you start to notice you aren't so much anymore. That would be my advise for speaking/communicating.
But if you're talking about writing, here's my advise (from someone who writes for fun, in absolutely no official capacity whatsoever, and was routinely rapped on the proverbial knuckles by high-school teachers for breaking all the Cardinal Rules of writing). Sometimes the best way to write is to just scribble it all out, dump it onto the page, and then take a step back and get out the fine-tooth tweezers. Being able to identify what about a certain phrase or sentence feels wrong can be the easiest way to find the solution. Asking, "Why doesn't this feel right? Not enough flavor? Not descriptive enough? Too descriptive? What do I want to do here?" Whatever the answer is, is what you attempt to remedy. A lot of times when I write, I find myself getting very flowery, lots of very long drawn out sentences peppered with descriptors and visual cues, and at times the little Fanfiction.net Troll in my brain screams, "PURPLE PROSE!!!" So I'll rewrite the same sentence, deleting nothing, again and again, in a bunch of variations, and then compare them all side by side. Ultimately, everyone's trying to accomplish something different with their writing. For me, I don't care if I break a lot of rules or sound silly, I'm trying to convey an emotion. I want to give you a feeling. Sometimes the words sound silly, the paragraph looks ugly, but when I read it to myself again, it takes me somewhere—it takes me to the feeling. And that's when it's right, for me.
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Do you have any tips for writing fanfiction?
Hey, Anon, thanks for the ask and sorry about the delayin replying. I’ve been writing fanfiction for so long that I’ve gotten into abit of a routine with it so I had to have a think about what I actually do. These tipsare based on my own writing practice, experience and approach to fanfic.But I would encourage you to keep asking this question, keep chatting withother authors (some might be kind enough to comment here) as you search for your ownunique writing style and practice. Everyone’s will be different and, as long asit works, I say stick with it. I’m assuming that you’re a new or aspiringauthor so I hope one, some or all of these tips prove useful.
1. Get In The Zone: Find the time of day when yourbest writing happens. For me (rather inconveniently when there’s work to bedone), this is first thing in the morning. For others, I’ve heard it’s themiddle of the day or late at night. But you will know this time when you find itbecause words and ideas will flow freely and easily, faster sometimes than yourfingers can keep up. Revel in this time, use it well then stop writing when theenergy runs out. Nothing good was ever produced by pushing past inspirationinto frustration or exhaustion. That said, inspiration can strike at any time – while watchingan ep or taking a walk or going about your work or trying to fall asleep. When itdoes – whether it’s an opening line, a plot point or snippet of dialogue – jotthose ideas down.
2. Watch (and Rewatch) Your Source Material: Thismay sound obvious (and not much of a chore for a fan) but watching whatevermovie/show/whatever you’re working from helps you to pick up the jargon of thatworld, to absorb the particular milieu, to know the people, places and canon(before you presumably diverge from it). The best fanfic gets both the bigpicture and the little details right. Without these firmly in place, you riskwriting a story that doesn’t ring true to the basic characters, tone orsituation you’re attempting to emulate. You want to extend a reality you love,not break it. So always be on the lookout for any little thing that mightfracture this reality and cause readers to fall out of a world they (you mustassume) know equally well. As a reader, there’s always a jolt when this happens, a dishearteningplummet. So know your stuff before you put pen to paper.
3. Get the Voices Right: Unlike character which canbe ambiguous, changeable and open to interpretation, every fan becomes attuned tothe particular voices of their favourite characters. When reading, you don’t need to work toknow when an author gets this right. You can just hear it. You can also (unfortunately)hear the tiniest slip in consistency and truth. I have written for somecharacters with very distinctive voices, voices I really didn’t think I couldemulate: both Ten and Donna in “Doctor Who”, Jack and Liz in “30 Rock” and,more recently, Gene Hunt in “Ashes to Ashes”. My particular trick for writingthese characters, for practicing their voices, was to write out the dialoguefirst then fill in everything else. Obviously this is only going to work forfics like this, this and this that rely heavily on banter. I love this kind offic. I love reading ‘em and I love writing ‘em. But even in fics which meldprose and dialogue, writing the dialogue out in isolation can help since theseaspects use slightly different writerly muscles.
4. Spellcheck is Your Friend: There will probablyalways be errors in your writing but do your best to avoid preventable andobvious mistakes. These can destroy your credibility as a narrator and takeyour reader out of your story. Personally, I am a compulsive editor. I wouldn’trecommend it. But I would recommend reading through your work at least once andrunning spellcheck before posting. Reading aloud can also help to identify anygrammatical errors or issues with flow. You can, if you find a friend willingto act as beta, outsource some of this work.
5.Don’t Be Afraid to Start Small: I’m a fan of theshort, self-contained fic. I’ve written lots of them and significant work must still go into making them work. So don’t aim to produce 25,000brilliant words right off the bat. Just 1-2,000 solid ones of which you can be proud.
6.Write What You Want: If you’re lucky, readerswill request fics of you (I have never been good at fulfilling these requests).If you’re unlucky, they’ll complain about directions you take or detail whythey refuse to read what you’ve written (this is pretty rare). But you can’t, Ibelieve, force inspiration. It’s either there or it’s not. For me, I beganwriting fanfic because there just wasn’t any for a pairing I shipped. So Iwrote it myself, for myself. I wrote what I liked and wanted to read (I stilldo). This is a medium in which fans have complete autonomy. They choose to go frompassive consumer to active creator. So just do what you do. Do whatever youwant. Turn back time. Bring people back from the dead. Unite lovers. Mergeworlds. Create characters. Make it sad, happy, dramatic or funny or both. You have the power. Claim it. Play with it. Revel init.
7. Start Strong and End Strong: You gotta have agood first line, in my theory of ff. That’s where it (literally) all begins. I always like to openwith something concise and intriguing that immediately communicates a little (butnot necessarily all) of what I’m planning to work with. Don’t be fooled intothinking you gotta start at the beginning. You don’t. You can enter the storyat any point. You can enter late – and leave early, as the saying goes. Thisis a screenwriting principle that ensures that only the most relevantinformation is included in a scene. It keeps the pace of a piece up, controlsthe dissemination of information and keeps audiences engaged. I think thisprinciple transfers rather easily to the page, especially since most of us areemulating material from the big or small screen. In order to imitate thesevisual mediums in written form, you might like to think of paragraphs, breaksand sentence structure as editing techniques that can guide the reader’s pace, growingperception and emotional experience.
8.Avoid Clichés: Clichés can occur at the level ofexpression, character or narrative. At the level of expression, these arewasted words that hold no meaning so find a fresh way to express what you mean.At the level of character, keep words, thoughts and actions rooted in thecharacter. “Show, Don’t Tell” is another well-known writing principle that can help maintain authenticity. As much as we may identify with certain characters, make judiciousdecisions about how much of yourself belongs in them. When writing intimaterelationships, less is often more. I know many shippers (myself included) spendyears sometimes LONGING for couples to express what they mean to each other,physically and/or verbally. By all means, let your beloved characters express –but not everything and not all at once, would be my advice. Allow them to maintainsome sense of mystery and sovereignty. At the level of narrative, clichés canactually work, especially if used with awareness. I had such fun writing a OneBed! fic for Jack and Liz, in which I paidtribute to some of the many reams of MSR fanfiction I had previously consumed.There were so many of these stories in that fandom that they became a categoryof their own, boasting a set of (increasingly ironic) conventions. Some fanfictraditions, it must be said, deserve to be embraced, extended and celebrated.
9. Read: Reading is the easiest way to absorbgrammar, to expose yourself to different writing styles and to become moreadept with language. So read books of all kinds. And read fanfic from your favefandoms. But read it actively, critically. Figure out what works and whatdoesn’t and why. Figure out what you enjoy, don’t and why. Apply theseinsights to your own writing and keep applying them. Keep improving. The more you read and write, the better you’ll get.
10. Avoid Comparisons: My best experiences of readingand writing fanfiction have been in strong, supportive communities. Generally,the more supportive the community has been, the more prolific I have been. These communitiesare wonderful spaces to inhabit, filled with peeps that love their shows,defend their ships and support their authors. Authors are always hungry forfeedback, and is it any wonder? Writing, creating and sharing takes work, love,thought and guts. You have to claim a little corner of a fandom and boldlystate that you have something to say that’s worth listening to. Sadly, you will probably never receive the same amount of energy back as you putin. This can lead to authors comparing their output and input, judging theirwork on its stats rather than on its merits. It can lead to them competing forthose few meagre reviews that roll in. This is partly why it is so important toreview fanfic, particularly fanfic you love and authors you read consistently.It’s part of encouraging and creating a sense of community in which people feeltheir voices are heard and their contributions valued. So be generous with others. Encourage and share. Read, review, reblog.Treat your fellow writers as your community, not your competition. Viewfanfic as a labor of love, an act of generosity that sometimes gives back. And if you don’t get the response you wishfor then make sure you hit that internal heart button and give yourself somekudos for trying, for creating, for loving something and letting it show.
Good luck. :)
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im putting you up to what you posted and I'm asking you to answer all of the writing questions. also the url change had me confused for half a second but im in love
This is why I’m my own worst enemy
2. Favorite part of writing.
Creating a whole world, a whole other life, that people can someday enjoy and find comfort in when they’re feeling down
3. Least favorite part of writing.
Writing, like the fact that your ideas and storyline isn’t instantly onto the paper is insane
4. Do you have writing habits or rituals?
I mean I probably do but I can’t remember
6. Favorite character you ever created.
A teenage greek goddess I pulled out of my ass named Arendellia, she was a badass who died and I really just liked what I wrote involving her
9. Least favorite trope to write.
the opposites attract, in my opinion it’s cliche and unrealistic, I prefer the characters have similar interests but different approaches to things if that makes sense?
10. Pick a writer to co-write a book with and tell us what you’d write about.
Natasha Preston, and we’d wrote the sequel to The Cabin cause it’s been a year and I’m still not over the ending, I need a sequel
11. Describe your writing process from scratch to finish.
first I get a new notebook, I need a clean space for my ideas, then I wrote down a prologue or a description, it allows for my brain to fully process where I want the story to go, then I write until I hit a male characters name, cause I hate coming up with male names, if I have one picked out I’ll see if the image in my brain matches the name, if I can’t find a name that fits the project is discarded, if I find one that fits I write until I don’t know where to take the story next then I continue to formulate my ideas into actual scenes until I reach the end, then I close it up in a box never to be touched again until I accidentally find it while cleaning one day
12. How do you deal with self-doubts?
I either won’t show anyone or will preface saying “it’s not edited yet” or “I know it’s garbage lol”
13. How do you deal with writers block?
I listen to music, and write stories based off of the song titles, like I always try to write a chapter and if after a chapter I don’t think I have a story I move on, sometimes I’ll get a completely new idea but it really helps to get ideas flowing
14. What’s the most research you ever put into a book?
I’m currently waiting to write a book until I have all of the details, it revolves around Greek mythology but I want to be so accurate, not white wash, or erase the different sexualities of the Gods and I want to be accurate to the myths (a bit) but so far that’s the one
16. Where do you take your motivation from?
My brain telling me that it’ll leave me if I don’t get the ideas out of my head
18. What’s your revision or rewriting process like?
I learned in 7th grade that I need to do a complete rewrite which sometimes I do, other times I’m being nostalgic and read an old story then realize I’m an idiot so I edit it lol
19. First line of a WIP you’re working on.
‘"Coffee looks absolutely lovely on you, madam," I glare at Cody while attempting to pat myself dry.’ From that Dying in LA story I talked about earlier
21. Post the last sentence you wrote in one of your WIP’s.
’"I told the director to go suck a dick. It was the worse thing imaginable,” I groan into my hands.’ Same story, and it’s only the second chapter but yeah
22. How many drafts do you need until you’re satisfied and a project is ultimately done for you?
Bold of you to assume I actually finish my writings
23. Single or multi POV, and why?
As big of a fan that I am of different perspectives, I prefer single POV, I feel as though the character is more personal. Rarely do I do multi
24. Poetry or prose, and why?
Prose, my poetry is rather depressing and I just can’t
25. Linear or non-linear, and why?
Linear, otherwise in my opinion it doesn’t make a whole lot of sense
27. Do you share rough drafts or do you wait until it’s all polished?
yes and no (I’ll explain in next answer)
28. And who do you share them with?
the unpolished, I share on Wattpad because it’s easier to detach myself if they don’t like it, but I wait until polished for people I actually know
29. Who do you write for?
Myself, it’s a way for me to cope with life, and writing and rewriting an event that has happened to me helps me move on from the situation
31. Hardest character to write.
Men.
32. Easiest character to write.
Villains
35. Tell some backstory details about one of your characters in your story ________.
the main character in “Dying in LA” had a rough childhood (shut up at the cliche) and used acting to escape, she moves to LA when she’s 19 having fail after fail at auditions, she’s about to give up when she gets her big break. (Sorry I’m terrible at back stories)
36. A spoiler for story _________.
Oof I want to spoil DILA (Dying in LA) but I won’t, um, I started this story about this girl who gets kidnapped and um I’m kinda planning on killing her so there’s that.
38. Have you shared your outline of your story ________ with someone? If so, what did they think of it?
Bold of you to assume I’m not just BSing my way through my story
39. Do you base your characters of real people or not? If so, tell us about one.
Yes. Um, I’m gonna tell you about the real person cause I based so many characters off of this person. Oof okay, it was any ex. For years he was in EVERYTHING I wrote, the story usually focused on the what if’s or the repercussions of our relationship and the fall out of it. We just complemented each other so well the thought of writing something to try and capture our time together comforted me so much. I still get flashbacks of our time together and sometimes his personality shows up in my writing but it just goes to show how the people in your life stay with you.
40. Original Fiction or Fanfiction, and why?
Both? I think there’s upsides and down sides to both but both are so amazing and are fun to explore
44. Best piece of feedback you’ve ever gotten.
Be confident in your writing and it will show, don’t be afraid to take risks
45. Worst piece of feedback you’ve ever gotten.
“Great job! Keep up the good work!” Um???? what good work???? be specific please!
46. What would your story _______ look like as a tv show or movie?
DILA would hopefully be done in a CW style where like it’s light hearted but a real plot and seriousness lies beneath? I actually don’t know?
47. Do you start with characters or plot when working on a new story?
Plot, my guy
48. Favorite genre to write in.
Realistic Fiction
49. What do you find the hardest to write in a story, the beginning, the middle or the end?
the middle, most likely I already have the end and beginning planned
51. Describe the aesthetic of your story _______ in 5 sentences or words.
Dying in LA: fame, used, lost, forgotten, greed
52. How did writing change you?
It gave me a place to express myself and cope with life and the struggles I’ve been through
53. What does writing mean to you?
Everything, it gives me a voice when I feel like I don’t have one
54. Any writing advice you want to share?
Keep writing, practice really does make perfect
Also the url is the best (any numbers missing means I already answered them, check under #asks )
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1. Favorite place to write.
On break during school or work.
2. Favorite part of writing.
The exciting, vibrant, fuzzy feeling I get when something comes out really good.
3. Least favorite part of writing.
Writer's block.
4. Do you have writing habits or rituals?
Not writing but still holding onto the someday mantra.
5. Books or authors that influenced your style the most.
I don't really know, I read a lot. Like A LOT a lot.
6. Favorite character you ever created.
Justin Gabe Leon of The Consequences of Beth. He is supposed to be like the good guy, but he is way worse than anyone realizes.
7. Favorite author.
Stephen King.
8. Favorite trope to write.
Hurt/Comfort.
9. Least favorite trope to write.
Anything with a bad ending.
10. Pick a writer to co-write a book with and tell us what you’d write about.
l'd write a story with my middle school best friend that shall not be named. Likely a romance because we both are reluctantly prone to writing them.
11. Describe your writing process from scratch to finish.
I write like crazy and professionally for like a week and then I get busy with something else and the inspiration disperses and I only write sometimes. Like only when I get an idea or something. A lot of fanfictions to be honest.
12. How do you deal with self-doubts?
I tell myself it is in my head. Most everyone who had read my stuff thinks it has a lot of potential.
13. How do you deal with writers block?
I try to write through it. If I'm really stuck, I rewind and rewrite already written scenes until I get a further idea of what to do with it.
14. What’s the most research you ever put into a book?
Probably when I wrote a fanfiction of Soul Eater and I needed some information about some secondray characters. Most of the time i go by a write what you know mantra.
15. Where does your inspiration come from?
My inspiration comes from other writers works.
16. Where do you take your motivation from?
My motivation comes from nothing except random feelings of "what the hell am I doing with my life."
17. On average, how much writing do you get done in a day?
On average, I write very little. It's mostly whatever I have to write for class.
18. What’s your revision or rewriting process like?
I rewrite as I go. Then again at the end. Then repeat. It just keeps going.
19. First line of a WIP you’re working on.
“I was woken by the gunshots.”
20. Post a snippet of a WIP you’re working on.
Amidst a dreary fog, a young woman finds herself disoriented by looming lights, becoming closer and larger by the second. Her vision glares and the few paces she could see in front of herself fade away. She blindly throws her arms out to keep upright as she continues towards her destination and, more importantly, away from the glowing orbs behind her. Just as her vision begins to return, it is enveloped in darkness again. Had the lights dispersed? She glances over her shoulder for a moment. They are still there, but smaller, and concealed by the trees. She sighs relievedly and turns back around. A cold chill rushes past her. Annoyedly, she tugs at the strings of her hoodie. The thick fabric falls over her eyes. Before she can even reach up to move it out of her view, she kicks herself in the heel. Flailing about wildly, she stumbles forward. Long blades of grass grab at her ankles.
A strangled yelp escapes her as she finally hits the ground. Her palms burn, sending worse tingling sensations up her arms until they give out completely. She fights to sit up again, flailing backward and landing on her butt. Cold rainwater soaks through her jeans. She grimaces.
Then, she gasps. Little shards of rocks cover her palms, trapped in tiny cuts. She brushes them away the best she can. Most of the pebbles fall onto her lap while others remain deeply embedded. Cursing to herself, she looks around for something to work them out with. More of the same tiny rocks surround her. They stretch far in front of her and even farther to her left. It’s a driveway.
Scrambling to her feet, she begins to dash down the road. Nothing appears in front of her or changes around her. She slows to a stop, breathing heavily. It’s too dark to tell if she is heading in the right direction. Everything is either black, gray, or disguised by scattered, glittery orbs. The lights begin to form into one, brightening the path in front of her. Not too far away is a house.
Despite how long she has been looking for it, it’s nothing extravagant. A simple trailer hidden by trees and lined by bushes. It’s hardly visible at all in fact. As she gets closer though, she notices good elements to the structure. A small porch leads up to the door, beside it is a bush, and between the two is just enough space for her to slip between.
Crouching down, she pulls dead leaves and other muck over her like a blanket. Another sickening feeling moves through her as the moist goo makes contact with her bare skin. Or maybe the twists through her gut are caused by the sound of gravel crunching under the wheels of a car. The vehicle stops and the lights go out.
A door flies open and someone steps out. He wanders cautiously towards her without shutting the door. Of course he saw her and of course he is going to be smart about confrontation. She closes her eyes and listens to him walk. Each stomp is closer than the last. Then it stops again and her eyelids turn orange.
The yellow circle from a flashlight luminates the siding above her head. It rests there for a moment before dashing across the house. It reaches the woods and turns around again, following the same path before landing on her. Their eyes meet and he drops the flashlight.
A minute passes and neither makes an effort to retrieve it. It’s all so overwhelming. He anticipated a startled racoon; or even a deer; not the cowering eyes of his highschool sweetheart. Her name and everything else he wants to say attempts to seep between his lips, but he bites down before his thoughts become verbalized. If he allows himself to say, or do anything for that matter, he’s terrified of what he would do.
The light was on them for merely a second, but that's all it took for him to recognize her and hear him. Six years should have been more than enough time for them to become strangers, but with her expression it is obvious she had no trouble identifying him as well. Picking up the flashlight and redirecting it to her, he takes in her aged form. Her hair is the same length and she bares the same expressions. Her name fights at the tip of his tongue again, the only thing he can think to say. “Beth?”
21. Post the last sentence you wrote in one of your WIP’s.
Not again, not again.
22. How many drafts do you need until you’re satisfied and a project is ultimately done for you?
Yeah, haven’t figured that out yet.
23. Single or multi POV, and why?
Single, definitely single. It can get confusing and I find it to be a bit of lazy writing... don’t come after me.
24. Poetry or prose, and why?
Definitely poetry. I write a lot of it to decipher my feelings and it just sorta sounds cool.
25. Linear or non-linear, and why?
It depends on the story. I definitely have a habit of writing non-linear. I’m not the type to start with a whole bunch of background, you learn as you go just like when you meet someone.
26. Standalone or series, and why?
Standalone. I don’t like it as a reader because I want the conclusion within reach and I have a feeling a lot of my readers feel the same way. I can live with torturing with a dead character or two but I cannot make them die of anticipation.
27. Do you share rough drafts or do you wait until it’s all polished? 28. And who do you share them with?
I used to share rough drafts with people, but now I don’t even share polished stories. I don’t want to upset people or make them worry about me or get a bad review or to have my ideas stolen and done better... yeah, they are kinda for my eyes alone.
29. Who do you write for?
I write for my future readers and for my own enjoyment.
30. Favorite line you’ve ever written.
My favorite line I have ever written has to be “Don’t let the probable be more important than the definite.”
31. Hardest character to write.
The hardest character to write is someone very positive.
32. Easiest character to write.
The easiest character to write is Madeline from The Locket.
33. Do you listen to music when you’re writing?
Sometimes. It depends on where I am when I am writing.
34. Handwritten notes or typed notes?
Handwritten. It’s more memorable based on some studies I’ve read on studying and I have an addiction to notebooks.
35. Tell some backstory details about one of your characters in your story
Bethany is the accidental baby of a successful business women who abandoned her and an abusive, alcoholic father. She pushes people away to avoid being hurt and doesn’t really want anyone around anyways. Then she befriended the new boy at school and kissed him during a spur of a moment, last minute spiteful action against her late father. An orphan, she must trust the one person who doesn’t let her push him away.
36. A spoiler for story
Peter dies at the end.
37. Most inspirational quote you’ve ever read or heard that’s still important to you.
“It’s not the absense of fear, it’s over coming it.” - Emma Watson.
38. Have you shared your outline of your story ________ with someone? If so, what did they think of it?
No, I’ve never shared an outline. I shared verbal ideas with my friends in middle school and “finished” stories with friends in elementary school.
39. Do you base your characters of real people or not? If so, tell us about one.
No, I don’t base my characters off of real people. I think it is wrong. It is a way to deal I’m sure, but it is also hurtful.
40. Original Fiction or Fanfiction, and why?
Both. I write fanfiction for practice and fiction as the “real deal”.
41. How many stories do you work on at one time?
I work on one and will do random little prompts in between.
42. How do you figure out your characters looks, personality, etc.
My characters are the first thing that comes to me. I don’t really know how I think of them, they mostly come from my dreams.
43. Are you an avid reader?
Yes, I read and read and read and read some more.
44. Best piece of feedback you’ve ever gotten.
The best piece of feedback I’ve ever gotten was from my 5th grade teacher after just I started writing and finished my 1st “novel”. I still have the sticky note hanging on my wall she stuck on the inside of my notebook.
45. Worst piece of feedback you’ve ever gotten.
The worst piece feedback I’ve gotten is when my media teacher (I write articles) told me I’d make a good librarian because I’m organized, punctual, and love to read... but wouldn’t make it as a writer.
46. What would your story look like as a tv show or movie?
My story would definitely be a movie. It would have a cloudy, depressing filter on it like in Tim Burton films, but be live action and happy in parts.
47. Do you start with characters or plot when working on a new story?
I start with the characters. I get attached and I form the world around them.
48. Favorite genre to write in.
Realistic fiction.
49. What do you find the hardest to write in a story, the beginning, the middle or the end?
The middle of the story is the hardest to write. When I begin I know how I want to start and end and am “faking it till I make it” in the middle.
50. Weirdest story idea you’ve ever had.
The weirdest story idea I’ve ever had was definitely based on some dream I’ve had. There has been a lot of odd ones, but the one I actually made into a book idea was about a dystopian family with a father who is a part of a cult who kidnaps children and chemically manipulate the brains so they appear different then they really are. Or feed them to a giant, invisible man to keep them from killing the entire cult.
51. Describe the aesthetic of your story in 5 sentences or words.
My stories are dark with a sarcastic overtone.
52. How did writing change you?
Writing has made me more sensible to myself. Like, I understand me more.
53. What does writing mean to you?
Writing is a way of living and of communication.
54. Any writing advice you want to share?
To just do it. You don’t have to do it now or for the next twenty years. Having a colorful language and huge imagination is what makes you one, not how many words you have written.
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Self Conscious
Collection: Tim and Annie
Year: 1967
Characters: Annie Thompson, Timothy Turner
Content Warnings: Discussion of negative body image, body shaming, weight talk
Rating: T
Style: Prose
Summary: After Danny’s birth, some of the things Kenneth - and her mother - said about her body come back to haunt Annie. Annie struggles with the way her body has changed.
Kenneth used to comment on her body make her feel bad about not having a flat stomach, and her Mother too. After the baby she has even more of a tummy, along with stretch marks and hyper-pigmentation.
Annie had felt self conscious about her body to start with… and then she started dating Tim. She gets so anxious about him touching her stomach in particular. Whatever muscle tone she had is gone, she’s squishier than she was before, as her Mother’s friends used to sneer.
It actually makes her feel a little sick. He kisses her stomach and she tells him to go away.
Tim is so worried and confused. He sits up on the edge of the bed. “I - okay. Do you - did I do something wrong?”
He didn’t even kiss her skin, he’s been lying with his head in her lap and kissed over her pyjamas on impulse.
She didn’t have a problem with it when she was pregnant, and it was the easiest part of her he could reach from his position.
Annie shifts uncomfortably. “Not wrong? Just uncomfortable with that.”
“Oh,” Tim says, expression clearing a little, even though he still looks a little worried. “Um - having my head down there, or the kiss, or…?”
Annie curls up a little, her arms going around her middle.
“I feel gross….?” she shrugs her shoulders a bit.
Tim frowns even more. “Like… sick? You’re not in pain, are you?”
Wondering if she’d developed a hernia or something. It can happen sometimes
She shakes her head.
“I saw myself sideways in a mirror…..Daniel is more than six months old, I should have lost the weight already.”
Tim opens his mouth to respond and then closes it again. He doesn’t even know where to start with that.
“I - What. No. You *shouldn’t have* done anything at all other than recover and enjoy time with your baby.”
Annie looks at him and he can see her walls being placed. “That’s sweet of you to say Tim. But I need lose the weight. Get my body back.”
Her tone tells him she doesn’t want to keep talking about it.
He wants to argue with her, but will respect when she’s telling him she’s done talking about something.
"Do you want me to take the spare room tonight?” He asks her instead. Sometimes she does, when she needs space.
Annie nods and ducks her head.
Tim smiles a little and pats her ankle once before getting up .“Of course. Yell if you need anything.”
He pulls on his dressing gown and slippers to go next door. “See you in the morning.”
“I love you.”. Her voice is quiet
“I love you too. So much.”
He gives her a dorky little wave and slips out of the bedroom. He always hopes asking him to sleep in the guest room isn’t a Big Thing. He doesn’t want to seem upset. He’s not mad. He just wants to give her space if she needs it. It doesn’t have to be some big drama. And he’s adamant that it’s never done in a fight. There have been nights when she needed space initially but ends up waking Tim up when she slips into the spare bed with him.
It’s a few days until her body image issues come up again. She’s rushing around looking for a blouse that she swore was in the closet. So she’s in just her jeans and a bra.
Tim wanders into the bedroom doing up his tie. “Are you sure its not in the laundry bag still? Remember Danny spit up while you brought it in to be put away?”
He stops short, seeing her half undressed does things to his insides.
He doesn’t mean to look but he really can’t help it.
Annie goes pale when sue realizes he’s looking at her and grabs a tshirt to pull on quickly.
Tim frowns and reaches out to take her hand, but let’s his drop when she turns away from him with a short “I’ll go look.”
He stands still when she just brushes past time out of the room. He feels terrible.
They don’t get the chance to talk until later that night. He’s been mulling it over all day, all through his classes and tutorial.
She’s cleaning up the already tidy living room when he snags her hand and pulls her down to the couch with him.
“I’m sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable this morning.”
“I wasn’t dressed.” Annie huffs a little and wraps her arms around her middle. Looking a little like she might pick a fight.
“I know, I should have kept my gaze down. I wasn’t thinking. It’s just….you’re gorgeous. I got distracted.” he tries to give her little grin.
Annie makes an upset, angry noise. “Don’t tease. Don’t - lie to me.”
Tim looks at her startled. “ I’m not–what do you think I’m lying about?”
Sure he was exaggerating about the distraction a bit.
“I’m not - gorgeous,” Annie replies, body held tight and tense. “I’m not anything. It’s cruel to make fun.”
“What? Why would you think I’m making fun of you? You absolutely are gorgeous.”
Tim’s just, it’s not in him to think like that.
She finally turns to face him and she’s crying a little and her face is all scrunched up. “Stop /saying/ that! I know you’re trying to be nice but its not *working*. I’m - I have too much of a stomach and stretch marks and marks all over and I need to be *better* than this.”
Tim just looks at her. Not sure what to do.
He stands up and holds his hand out to her. “Come with me.”
She eyes him warily
“ Humor me?” He looks at her and wiggles his fingers.
She sighs, exhausted, and lets him take her hands. She just wants to hide.
He leads her up to Danny’s room, where the little boy is sleeping soundly.
He moves her so she’s standing in front of the cot and he moves behind her, wrapping an arm around her and putting his hand on her stomach. When she tries to move away from him he kisses her head and just holds her tighter.
“Tim, please.” Her voice is just a whisper.
“Your body brought this wonderful little boy into the world.” his voice is just as quiet.
“Six months ago,” she counters “More than.” she adds bitterly.
“Only.” he replies. “Your body grew with him, every stretch mark is a sign of that.”
Annie swallows.“He’s out now.”
“He is. And he has a beautiful mummy who focuses her time and energy on him.” Tim kisses her head.
Annie closes her eyes and shakes her head.
“And,” Tim continues, “Your body keeps *you* safe, feeds you and helps you grow, and I love every inch of it. I love all of you so much.”
Annie let’s herself lean into him.
“I don’t.” she whispers, voice breaking.
Tim kisses the side of her face. “Oh love… I do. So much. I wish you did.”
Tim turns them and guides them from Danny’s room. “let’s leave him sleep and go talk.”
Annie wants to protest. But she knows Tim won’t let it rest.
She sighs and lets him lead her to their room.
Tim sits down resting his back against the headboard and Annie does too, pulling the covers up over herself.He turns his head to look at her, sees she’s trying to make herself seem small. Trying to hide.He just wants to pull her close.He wishes he could make her see how he sees her
How much he wants to be with her. All of her. How much he’d still want that even if her belly wasn’t from pregnancy
She’s never been stick thin. Even before she was pregnant. And Tim found her insanely attractive then. He’s in love with her for her. He feels very out of his depth.
He shifts down on the bed so he’s laying down more than sitting up and lifts his arm. “Come cuddle?”
Annie sighs but lies down, her head on his shoulder. Taking the covers with her so they’re between their bodies and she’s still bundled up in them.
Tim wraps his arm around her shoulders and shifts a little bit so he can kiss her head.
“You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met. And if I have to tell you that every day for the rest of our lives, I will.”
Annie sniffs and presses her face into his shoulder.
“I just… can’t see it,” Annie mumbles into his shirt. “All I can see is… a mess.”
“I wish you could see you through my eyes.” His arm tightens around her.
Annie manages an exhausted chuckle. “Me too,” she admits
She still can’t totally believe him. But she does believe he could love her *despite* it
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You know what you dared (anyone really) me personally to send all the writer asks so FUCKIBG ALL OF THEM BETCH
1. Favorite place to write. - I really like taking my laptop with me and writing at parks or in hotel lobbies when my fam travels, but its comfortable and familiar to write at my desk in my room2. Favorite part of writing. - letting characters be sassy and snarky. also letting characters heal.3. Least favorite part of writing. - actually putting words on the page lmfao4. Do you have writing habits or rituals? - i put on my writing playlist and if i can grab a diet coke bc it helps me feel like im ready to be productive5. Books or authors that influenced your style the most. - ooh, for writing style Caroline Lawrence’s books influenced me a lot when i was younger and more recently @lbardugo and six of crows6. Favorite character you ever created. - ahhh probably Linde, a shapeshifter who rejects all human concepts including gender7. Favorite author. - again, Leigh Bardugo. also @canipetyourdragon but like technically shes not published yet 8. Favorite trope to write. - enemies to lovers lmfao9. Least favorite trope to write. - ahh idek 10. Pick a writer to co-write a book with and tell us what you’d write about. - @canipetyourdragon and we’d probs write abt some wacky adventure11. Describe your writing process from scratch to finish. - 1) have an idea and daydream abt it for a month 2) worldbuilding/character building for a g e s 3) finally get around to writing a shitty draft 4) s u f f e r 12. How do you deal with self-doubts? - whine at someone and then remind myself that nothing starts perfect and i have time to make it better. tbqh a lot of the time i remind myself that Six of Crows started as smthn like 31,000 words and is a lot longer in the final form and, no offense to leigh, was probs kinda crap at first lmfao13. How do you deal with writers block? - i remind myself that its not gonna get written if i dont write it, i sit my ass down, and i write something. anything. any stupid sentence. and then i write another one.14. What’s the most research you ever put into a book? - hoo boi am i bad at research n o t m u c h 15. Where does your inspiration come from? - a lot of my inspiration comes from music and other books, i have playlists that remind me of my characters and story on spotify and those help a lot16. Where do you take your motivation from? - i remember that i’ve always wanted to be a writer since i was like 5 and could barely write my name and i think about how much i want that to be a reality.17. On avarage, how much writing do you get done in a day? - ehh i’d say maybe 400 words on average? the least ive written recently is 100 words the most was 1,50018. What’s your revision or rewriting process like? - ah i havent worked on one story enough to know yet19. First line of a WIP you’re working on. - No matter how many she saw, Siora couldn’t get used to Outer Land bars.
20. Post a snippet of a WIP you’re working on. - “In a shocking plot twist, the rich Kitonian girl used to be a thief,” Linde said, mimicking some sort of announcer.
“Are you just here to add sarcastic commentary?” Siora glared at them.
She seems to glare at them a lot, Dema thought.
“That’s the whole reason I’m following you,” they said, then added, “Don’t give me that look, you know I don’t really care about the war.”
“My question is why is Siora still putting up with you,” Asteria laughed.
“Don’t give me any ideas,” The Beati girl grumbled, a smile playing on her lips.
“Oh yes, don’t encourage her. She might try to hurt me with one of her toothpicks.”
Dema laughed, “Don’t insult a lady’s knives, it’s not wise.”
“What’s a lady?” The Gerum asked, feigning confusion.
“Dema is a lady,” Asteria kissed the girl on the cheek, laughing.
“Doesn’t seem very ladylike to me,” Siora snorted.
“Like you’re one to talk,” Dema shot back.
“If anyone here is a lady, it’s me,” Linde said, sticking their nose in the air.
“You aren’t even a girl!” Asteria shrieked, grinning.
“Fair enough,” They nodded.
21. Post the last sentence you wrote in one of your WIP’s. - “Yep, now we’re just doing a final check to make sure we have everything,” The girl said without looking up.22. How many drafts do you need until you’re satisfied and a project is ultimately done for you? - ahh depends i havent really “completed” any big projects, but for short stories usually only one or two23. Single or multi POV, and why? - multiple because i have so many characters and none of them is really the /main/ character24. Poetry or prose, and why? - i love prose but tbh im a poet at heart i write a l o t of poetry
25. Linear or non-linear, and why? - linear, otherwise i get too confused26. Standalone or series, and why? - standalone, because i think the story im working on rn is only one book long. altho i do have another story in this world planned dont tell anyone 27. Do you share rough drafts or do you wait until it’s all polished? - i share as i write
28. And who do you share them with? only sharing with @canipetyourdragon tho29. Who do you write for? - myself and my future readers30. Favorite line you’ve ever written. - for prose? “You complain so much I’m starting to think it’s a religious observance,” Siora said, leaning against the wall. the answer is dif for poetry tho31. Hardest character to write. - a s t e r i a i love her but shes not fully fleshed out yet. also shes so good32. Easiest character to write. - linde that snarky bastard33. Do you listen to music when you’re writing? - yep i have a playlist that reminds me of my story34. Handwritten notes or typed notes? - both35. Tell some backstory details about one of your characters in your story. - Siora was raised to be the right hand guard of the princess, but was exiled when she died.36. A spoiler for story? - the villain gets redeemed37. Most inspirational quote you’ve ever read or heard that’s still important to you. - hm i really dont know. writing wise, i love the quote “if the muse is late for work, start without her.”
38. Have you shared your outline of your story with someone? If so, what did they think of it? - I tell wyna about all my story shenanigans and schemes, and so far i think she likes it lmao39. Do you base your characters of real people or not? If so, tell us about one.- not characters i like. sometimes background redshirts are based on people i hate so that i can kill them40. Original Fiction or Fanfiction, and why? - both. I love writing fanfiction, but i also have a lot of original stories to tell41. How many stories do you work on at one time? - only one at a time for me42. How do you figure out your characters looks, personality, etc. - a lot of the time it just comes to me, but i also answer ask memes like this as that character43. Are you an avid reader? - y e s 44. Best piece of feedback you’ve ever gotten. - hm im really not sure45. Worst piece of feedback you’ve ever gotten. - most unhelpful? “it sucked ass” - daedalus46. What would your story look like as a tv show or movie? - o h dude i would love to see it as a movie it would be a really cool fantasy aesthetic omg the effects for the shapeshifters would be so cool to see
47. Do you start with characters or plot when working on a new story? - this story actually started with setting48. Favorite genre to write in. - YA isnt a genre is it? technically fantasy i guess49. What do you find the hardest to write in a story, the beginning, the middle or the end? - the middle for sure50. Weirdest story idea you’ve ever had. - idk abt story idea but when i was 12 i killed a character by turning him into a tortilla ¯\_(ツ)_/¯51. Describe the aesthetic of your story in 5 sentences or words. - fantasy eclectic influence and design.52. How did writing change you? - honestly writing poetry gave me a way to express my feelings safely. it honest to gods helped me stop self-harming.53. What does writing mean to you? - to me it means putting my ideas and thoughts and self into the world in a way that people (hopefully) read and enjoy54. Any writing advice you want to share? - start writing and dont stop. if you think that its crap, remember that everything starts as crap, and if you think no one in the world wants to read it, remember that i definitely want to read it if you tell me about it.
tysm for asking omg!
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actually you know what? 1-54 lmao. (or just whatever ones you want to answer.)
This took way too long cause my niece has been a wiggleworm all morning and I’m up and down chasing her ever 5 mins lol.
1. Favorite place to write.There is a park about an hour away from me that I go to, if able, when I’ve got writer’s block. I’ll walk about a mile into the forest and sit by a creek that runs into the river. It’s a trip but is worth the effort when I just really need an isolated place to think.
2. Favorite part of writing.Character creation. Even in fanfiction, I always change up the background/personalities a little to add my own touch and present them in a new light. I also love learning and researching so I’ll just look up random things and see if I can’t design something or someone around an idea or belief.
3. Least favorite part of writing.Editing… moving on. I guess I should say editing my own work. Sometimes because I wasn’t the happiest with how a chapter turned out and sometimes because I really don’t feel like re-reading what I just wrote 3 times over only to read it again later and still find typos and parts that just don’t flow quite right.
4. Do you have writing habits or rituals?I have to be listening to something. Music, tv, the ambiance of a coffeeshop, etc. Unless I’m at my favorite place I can’t write in silence, but even there it isn’t quiet.
5. Books or authors that influenced your style the most.Toni Morrison morrison is the first name that pops into my head just because I re-read at least one of her books each month.
6. Favorite character you ever created.Childlike Evergreen for an idea that I’ve been playing with. She’s so cute and nothing like her character as an adult lol
7. Favorite author.Kristen Cashore, author of the Graceling series.
8. Favorite trope to write.
9. Least favorite trope to write.
10. Pick a writer to co-write a book with and tell us what you’d write about. 11. Describe your writing process from scratch to finish.1. Take pen and paper. Write everything that come to mind then end up trashing more than half of it.2. Write nothing but dialogue to go with everything written in step one.3. Combine both into a word document.4. Edit and make look pretty for others to enjoy.
That’s actually how I do it. I will plot out and idea with rough imcomplete details. If something need dialogue to get it moving a have a seperate journal that I write nothing but raw dialogue in. I color code everything so that it’s easy to reference back to and see what goes with what. Then I literally just splice the two parts together including every possible word before editing and cutting most of it out.
12. How do you deal with self-doubts? I’ll go through some of my older pieces that I’ve never published/shared and compare it to my current work. Idk, seeing how far i’ve improved always give me a boost in confidence.
13. How do you deal with writers block?First, I walk away from a project because trying to force something out can ruin a piece and just spend a little time each day writing something, anything, just so that I’m always keeping up with my practice. I’ll also read a bit more and get out of the house more often cause my writer’s block stems from cabin fever most of the time.
14. What’s the most research you ever put into a book?With my current piece that I’m writing. I took the idea of herbal medicine and looked up different plants what were used as medicines/ healing aids. Example: Belladonna, deadly nightshade, tincture was used to help aleviate thing like motionsickness, nausea, and even menstrual cramps. I thought it was interesting and since I was writng about dragon slayers and their perpetual uneasiness with transportaion, added into the story. In general though I always do a fair amount of research because I’ve not experienced all there is in the world and want to be able to make a connection with readers by presenting believable and accurate ideas.
15. Where does your inspiration come from?I’ve always felt more comfortable expressing myself through the written word and grew to love books and storytelling when I was little.
16. Where do you take your motivation from?Same as question 15?
17. On avarage, how much writing do you get done in a day?If I’m doing computer work, anywhere from 1500 to 2000 words. I could easily do more if I let myself, and I sometimes do, but I always walk away from it at some point during the day so as to not overexhert my hands since they already hurt my after a while of handwriting or typing.
18. What’s your revision or rewriting process like?For revisions, I can just cut and add in the document. If i doing a rewrite I will create a new document and write it side by side. I feel like i make more changes that way which is the point of rewrites.
19. First line of a WIP you’re working on.He wiped the sweat from his brow as he came upon her silhouetted form on the forest floor.
20. Post a snippet of a WIP you’re working on.“What is you plan to accomplish with this stupid ritual?”
“Oh, I don’ even know it’ll work. I just read about it thought maybe I’d give it a go if the opportunity presented itself. Your cerlestial mage appearing was just that.”
21. Post the last sentence you wrote in one of your WIP’s.Lucy had been so caught up in herself that she failed to asking how Bickslow was holding up. 22. How many drafts do you need until you’re satisfied and a project is ultimately done for you?Nothing is ultimately ever done for me. that’s propably why I’m still sitting on a collection of shortstories that I’d like to get published but haven’t yet.
23. Single or multi POV, and why?No preference. Both come fairly easy to me but I think that if done well, single POV provides the most entertainment.
24. Poetry or prose, and why?Prose. I’ve taken poetry classes and had to read said poetry in front of 100+ people in college. I still cringe when I tell that story…
25. Linear or non-linear, and why?
26. Standalone or series, and why?Standalone. I just can’t imagine writing multiple multichapter things centered around the same idea. Idk
27. Do you share rough drafts or do you wait until it’s all polished? 28. And who do you share them with?Rough drafts are for my eyes only. Occasionally a beta when I find the need but that’s rare.
29. Who do you write for?For the sole purpose of manipulating the emotions of readers. Basically, I like to write trash that’ll make people cry when it suits me. Nah, I write because my head is full of all sorts of ideas and I just have to get them on paper so to speak. Sharing my creative writing is something new for me but so far, I’m not regretting that choice.
30. Favorite line you’ve ever written.You showed me the world, then left.
31. Hardest character to write.Gray… never was a favorite of mine so I just can’t connect with him.
32. Easiest character to write.Lucy
33. Do you listen to music when you’re writing?Most of the time.
34. Handwritten notes or typed notes?Handwritten. I waste a lot of paper and wish that I didn’t but it’s just most comfortable for me to handwrite the roughest form then expand the ideas on the computer.
35. Tell some backstory details about one of your characters in your story ________.
36. A spoiler for story _________.
37. Most inspirational quote you’ve ever read or heard that’s still important to you.You aren’t the man who will make or break me. I have learned those men do not exist… I do not need you in my life. But I really, really want you in it
38. Have you shared your outline of your story ________ with someone? If so, what did they think of it?Meh, I’ll talk to my brother about ideas sometimes. He’s not a writer but he’s a good listener and is one of the few people that actually seem to enjoy it when I talk about writing with him.
39. Do you base your characters of real people or not? If so, tell us about one.I do and my favorite one is based off of my best friend from college. This girl and I met a week before classes began and she really like how my name was spelled. We hit it off from there. I’ve actually written a story based off of that first interaction between us. She’s a family woman and has such a passion for teaching english. She’s got an attitude and does what she wants, but she was the mom friend that i needed because I usually play mom for my other friends lol
40. Original Fiction or Fanfiction, and why?Both. All of my original works are based off of real stories from real people that I know. My fanfiction is where my creativity shines though especially when working with a universe like Fairy Tail.
41. How many stories do you work on at one time?However many that suits me. My exception to this rule is only 1 multichapter fic at a time due to how much time and research I invest into the piece. I’m also far more critical about editing chapter versus oneshots.
42. How do you figure out your characters looks, personality, etc.
43. Are you an avid reader?Yes. Reading is what makes the writer.
44. Best piece of feedback you’ve ever gotten.One semester I took a research class and had to design and conduct my methods and gather data. There was one part where we had to develop how we were to gather the data we sought and my instructor told me that it was hard for him to critique my methods because I had already done so in the proposal. I figure leaving a guy who writes for a living unable to write anything is a good thing lol
45. Worst piece of feedback you’ve ever gotten.Taking a creative writng class with people who don’t love writing as much as I do. To elaborate, we would be required to write something of our own creation and you could tell who loved writing based on the feedback they gave. I can’t begin to say how many people took to giving me grammar advice because they couldn’t think of anything to say about the content…
46. What would your story _______ look like as a tv show or movie?
47. Do you start with characters or plot when working on a new story?Characters.
48. Favorite genre to write in.Adventure/drama
49. What do you find the hardest to write in a story, the beginning, the middle or the end?Always the beginning.
50. Weirdest story idea you’ve ever had.Oh god. Please no. Umm when I was like 15 I started writng this story about elemental angels and they had to save the world or something like that. Idk, when I look back on it I think that it’s weird
51. Describe the aesthetic of your story _______ in 5 sentences or words.
52. How did writing change you?Writing has helped me to become more confident in myself and also helped me to cope and move forward from the abuse I lived through when I was little.
53. What does writing mean to you?Writing is literally what saved my life so it’s everything.
54. Any writing advice you want to share?Write. If it’s something you want to do then do it. You only get better the more you pratice it. If you don’t know what to write, try a word promt challenge and write about whatever comes to mind. Just let your ideas flow.
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Author Spotlight: LaTessitrice
First up, I would like to make it VERY clear that my arm was twisted into doing this by my fellow mods. I was harassed! Bullied! They threatened to give me wedgies and swirlies and all sorts.
I got nominated a few times but I always declined as I thought it was icky doing it for myself. I still do. BUT. I am now the only mod standing who hasn’t been featured, and it was decided that we should all have one so that you have an idea of why we love Wintershock.
So without further (grudging) ado:
01. What about Wintershock as a pairing appeals to you?
The two characters are the heart of it, and how I think their dynamic would work. Darcy is one of my favourite MCU characters, especially in the fic world, so she’s always a go-to when it comes to ships. Then when Bucky Barnes came onto the scene, the pair seemed a natural fit to me. He’s been through hell but at the core he’s a brave, loyal man. He’s damaged but with enough care, the old, charming Brooklyn boy might emerge again. Darcy’s also brave and loyal, but we’ve also seen that she’s a good caregiver and persistent too. She’s the kind of soul that Bucky needs to help him heal - someone who’s seen enough weirdness but isn’t battle-scarred and has the softness and optimism to keep him believing in people.
02. How did you first encounter the pairing?
I think I first read something before The Winter Soldier had even been released, as part of a WinterShieldShock soulmate story. I liked the dynamic, although at that time there was precious little fic featuring Bucky, and his characterisation was mostly guesswork based on The First Avenger and the comic arc. Then in late 2015 I watched The Winter Soldier again and for some reason it really grabbed me that time around, which led me seeking out more Bucky-centric fic. I found Lefty’s Road Trip series (then in progress) and, as everyone says, it’s a gateway drug. I was hooked!
03. Do you have any specific Wintershock headcanons?
I think both characters are extremely protective of each other, in different ways. Bucky is constantly paranoid that Darcy’s relationship with him will lead to her being hurt - or worse - and Darcy won’t stand for anyone who blames Bucky for what he did as a prisoner of Hydra. Tony’s got salted coffee many times for little barbs he’s flung Bucky’s way.
Sometimes Bucky’s desire to protect Darcy results in him pushing her away, but the two of them are both so stubborn it’s a rock meeting an immovable force. Bucky’s not very good at expressing what he’s thinking and feeling - mostly because he’s not very good at understanding it anymore - but Darcy knows it almost instinctively, and won’t let him simmer in unhealthy emotions.
As for tropes: soulmates (obvs), fake marriage, and a nice big dollop of ABO. Mutual pining in many forms is also my big go-to. Love it.
04. Do you associate any particular songs with Wintershock? If so, which one?
Did you mean: do you have playlists set up for the fics you’ve written and also for Wintershock in general. Why yes, yes I do!
A few choices - Fear by Sarah McLachlan, The Foreboding Sense of Impending Happiness by HIM, Maps by the Yeah Yeah Yeahs, Wild Horses by the Sundays (a big favourite for many ships), Carry by Tori Amos, This Is Love by PJ Harvey, You’ve Got the Love (Florence + the Machine) - okay I’m stopping.
05. What Wintershock fic by someone else would you recommend to others to read? What about this fic appeals to you?
Well, first up has to be Three Weeks, Ten States, and One Million Reasons to Fall for You aka the first part of the Road Trip of Champions. Beyond that, anything by Pollydoodles, my sometime writing partner. She manages to write comedy, romance and drama with an equally deft and compelling touch. And for a sweet, smutty and short intro to the ship, Making A Point by Becisvolatile.
06. What kind of Wintershock story would you love to read that hasn’t been written yet by you or others?
I definitely have other Wintershock stories planned, which I’ll write once I’ve finished the many, many WIPs I have. I like fairytale and mythology AUs -- anything with a Persephone/Hades spin is a winner in my eyes but I’m not aware of any yet. And I do think the ship is lacking good, plotty, long-form but complete ABO. Someone should get on that.
07. Out of the Wintershock stories you’ve written, which is your favourite, and why?
If You Were My Love. Hands down. It’s about the easiest thing I’ve ever written, the reception to it was *amazing* - I wasn’t expecting much feedback at all and yet people really seemed to respond to it. It marries some of my favourite tropes - soulmates, mutual pining - and drops in a twist ending that I’m proud nobody really predicted. I think I managed to blend drama, romance, angst, and action, with a dash of humour, which is no mean feat for something that’s only novella-length. Plus I’m really proud of some of my prose in that story.
08. Quote a favourite extract from one of your stories. What is it that you like about it?
He can’t remember ever being this happy. Not even when she said his words, because that was an incomplete joy, hamstrung by confusion and the fresh scars of his recapture by Hydra. When she told him she loved him probably comes a close second, but being this close to her—it’s indescribable. Like he’s got warm bubbles of champagne running through his veins.
That she trusts him enough to sleep beside him, unguarded and vulnerable, means more than she will ever understand. He tries to pretend that he believes he is a person, a human being warped and worn by the whims of the universe, but he will never rid himself of the knowledge that he is a beast. He will never be able to clean his hands of the blood they have shed, but tonight he used them for an entirely different purpose, the callouses moving across her delicate skin with a gentleness he hadn’t know he still had within him. Somewhere under the blankets are the words are on her hip, words he worshiped in an entirely new way tonight.
He never thought he would ever be warm again, that the cold would haunt him forever, the bone-deep chill as much a part of him as the metal arm. And yet, she melted that away. That’s what Darcy gave to him: warmth.
This is from one of the IYWML outtake pieces, a short and fluffy morning-after-the-first-night snapshot that I think really captures that post-orgasmic emotional and physical chill. Again, people really liked some of the description, and I think (hope) people can really feel the happiness that Bucky’s feeling in this moment.
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rambling;
i have nothing good to post, so i thought it might be fun to compile some answers to various ffxiv- and rp-related memes and questionnaires i’ve done on my private accounts! please enjoy my screaming.
8. Is there a character that embodies your good traits, or traits you wish you had? Several characters? Which ones and what traits?
i wish i was handsome and suave like all my characters thanks
13. What’s something you’ve never thought about your character?
a certain someone recently decided to remind me that francel's house has no bathroom... and i had honestly never considered, in two whole years of playing him, where he goes to pee?
"do you mean poop" francel is a delicate maiden i will not consider this
(we figure there’s probably an outhouse... somewhere...)
3. What’s something that surprises you about your canon?
Wiltswys: You think me cold? Well, fie on what you think! I wanted something better than tilling salty fields and spilling small fry out the nets, and occasionally taking a passing sailor into my bed for more o' the same!
LISTEN THIS IS THE MOST VULGAR LINE IN THE GAME I SWEAR TO GOD
i have done this quest at least... 4 or 5 times now and it never fails to make me scream. and every time i do it i have to zoom in on her and look at her face because she is a really cute roe girl, so i wonder what her taste in sailors is...
19. Give me an appearance-related headcanon of your choice.
LAUGHS OK hmm what have i never said before...
i have definitely mentioned that i don’t think francel likes his appearance very much — he especially wishes he had lighter-colored eyes like stephanivien and aurvael...
i personally want to think that chlodebaimt looked very different from francel BUT, although i have never datamined the necrose knight (i really should), a friend of mine took screenshots and his eyes at least look like francel's eyes
...but they might very well have just used a generic house haillenarte knight model for that, so who knows what chlodebaimt looked like?
i also like to think that baurendouin (francel's father) persists in the belief that his youngest son will do great things because he at least superficially resembles driancoin de haillenarte (the haillenarte founder you see in the haldrath flashback scene). i mean, i doubt portraits of driancoin survived or anything, given the nondescript statues of thordan's knights, but i’m sure comments about him did?
"he was fair of face and fair of hair" idfk some shit like that
5. What do you hate about your canon?
i am always, ALWAYS so tired of hearing people complain about how “no one ever” treats the wol like they’re “a normal person” ah, yes no one no one ever has treated you nicely never mind the fact that people regularly apologize for turning to you in their hours of need, and for asking you to kill things, and you usually just dismiss their applogy no one!!! has ever!! been nice!! to the wol!! i know the entire arc of my francel writing career has been bitching about similar things but at least i find new ways to do it
ok wait i have to vent more about how people still persist in the NO ONE WAS NICE TO THE WOL BUT HAURCHEFAAANT!!!!! delusion like tataru fucking made you clothes recently IS THAT NOT THE ULTIMATE EXPRESSION OF LOVE? YOU'VE FINALLY BEEN REWARDED WITH SOMETHING PHYSICAL AND TANGIBLE!! STOP COMPLAINING ABOUT HOW YOU DON’T HAVE FRIENDS!!
24. What’s a song that reminds you of your character?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1B7VKiJhU_s “Dear Jack,” by Jack’s Mannequin.
lately, i’ve been listening to this... i don't like every part of this song, but lyrically, it is such a perfect francel song
dear jack, i write you as a friend dear jack, i write for fear the end is coming soon to you it's not so clear it's clear to me it's clear as glass
dear jack, wherever you are, hold tight wherever he is, shine light right there be strong i dare
i had songs for you i had all your music written out the words came when i heard you screaming i had plans for you until the plans fell through now there is no turning back, my dear jack
11. Something you like to look at.
i have complicated feelings about haurchefant these days, but sometimes i go and look at this mug and cry about his handwriting
like from a lore perspective i know he can't be writing in english because they write in eorzean but until then, my friend...
14. When writing for specific characters, is there anything you have to do to get in the specific mindset?
yes! but it depends on the character. for ramza... i either read shakespeare (for real — i have lifted quotes wholesale from hamlet and the tempest) and/or listen to "rather be" by clean bandit? seriously, that is my most strong ramza association... which is weird because the song and the game are like 20 years apart? or i listen to the FFT ost...
for francel i have a whole playlist, but most importantly i either go on twitter and look at wolchefant fanart or read bad wolchefant fanfic on ao3... (don’t judge me; it keeps the bitterness alive)
18. Is there anything you really wish you could do that you feel is outside your current ability? A concept that you wish you could pull off but are uncertain about?
UMMM... hmmmmmmm...
i dont know... i don’t really think any plots are outside of my current ability, but i admire my friends for being so consistent and on the ball with their dignified prose? i can be dignified too, but at some point i'll crash and start writing intensely silly tags
i would like to do more plots where francel is a badass for whatever reason, but that’s just wish fulfillment
17. Which character is the easiest to write? Why do you think that is?
francel is the easiest to write because he has the ugliest emotions
ramza is the hardest because he is always so virtuous
everyone else has varying levels of self control, but with francel i can usually succumb to base impulse reactions. i like his unguarded nature...
6. When writing a character, do you find it easier to work on their external or internal ticks first? oh, internal, definitely. i think my tags suffer from the fact that i often don’t describe what my characters are doing or what is around them? just... just assume on my behalf lmao.... so IF FRANCEL IS CAUGHT UP IN INTERNAL TL;DR there's a 90% chance he's doing that kicked-puppy stare at the floor
5. Has fandom ever ruined a pairing for you? XIV, hard mode: no Haurchefant/WoL.
LMAO THAT HARD MODE...
xiv's fandom has rarely "ruined" pairings for me, as in "i liked them before but i hate them now solely because of fandom"... that said, i think i kind of liked the idea of zephirin and aymeric as a rivalry ship, but i hate when fandom takes the "oMG ZEPH RAPED AYMERIC WHEN HE WAS HELD CAPTIVE" route...
i think this perception of zephirin as this horrible awful evil man comes from the fact that the information on the ward happened after the game was released, so... in the span of time between "zephirin killed haurchefant" and "wait actually zephirin is a virtuous man," people formed their opinions, you know?
but it's still really annoying, and to some degree the misconception persists...
i was also okay with guydelot and sanson at first, but i’m a little annoyed by them now, too... it’s not for any particular reason — i just think the fandom is annoying in the "THEY'RE SOOO MARRIED!! EVEN THE OTHER QUEST NPCS SAY THEY'RE LIKE A MARRIED COUPLE!! THEY’RE SO CANON!!!" way and i’m like Please Shut Up. that said, i guess it’s mostly jealousy because none of my pairings are ever canon, but whatever...
so i guess i'm going with zephirin/aymeric, guydelot/sanson... and oh btw like. urianger/moenbryda to a degree? i remember when the wind-up moenbryda item came out and the english item description was like "you don't want to know what urianger did to this" or something like that, like, i just took it as — like urianger probably dressed it up in a little maid outfit and had it serve him tea or something equally otaku-like?
but the entire fandom was like OMG HE JERKED OFF TO IT OR USED IT AS A SEX DOLL OR SOMETHING and i was like ... okay. like if that's how you're determined to see it, fine, but fandom always takes the worst possible interpretation of something i swear to god
13. Unpopular opinion about XXX character?
LAUGHS WELL I GUESS MY USUAL TIRADE: i don't think of haurchefant as the perfect cinnamon roll angel and actually he annoys me a little...
my friend just finished running coerthas quests on her balmung alt and like... even she commented on how brusque and condescending he seems to francel? and she has no reason to be tainted by my perception of him, it's just... it’s just that he is brusque and condescending.
back when i liked haurchefant/francel, i told myself that it was just how he acted in the heat of the moment and i was sure he was gentler later... but now we’ve seen so much of haurchefant that from the way he treats francel it really feels more to me like francel was just a friend of convenience. i don’t know. i’m bitter. maybe i’m just bitter because it’s easier to cope that way.
14. Unpopular opinion about your fandom?
um... well, i think everyone in the ffxiv fandom also agrees that the fandom is annoying...
something i sometimes worry about, but which is not exclusive to ffxiv, is like... people who rp wind up with such a different impression of things than people who just play the game?
i'm not judging either side on this but... i have rp friends, and i observe the rp community on tumblr/balmung, and i also have friends that are just gamers? and you know, like. sometimes rpers get carried away and invent all these narratives, like i know some tumblr rpers had a bunch of "plots" where a murder mystery happened in ishgard and it was all full of like noble OCs and intrigue or something?
but my gamer friends will sometimes be like, “ishgard is so boring.” so they... see it differently? you wind up viewing the game differently based on what you do in it.
there's also the divide between the english version of the game and the rest of the world, which i bitch about a lot but
just as an example, in english the nobles of ishgard are kind of broadly characterized as being unintelligent and shallow and foppish, whereas the other versions of the game really take a much more neutral approach?
or well i can really only speak for the japanese, but in general the german and french versions of the game are loyal to the japanese, however, 2.0 content was often based on the english...
so, for example, 2.0 content was EN->FR, but ever since 3.0 most of the patches have been JP->EN/DE/FR
however, the EN version continues to make changes, whereas DE and FR don't really change many things!
so i worry a lot about the different perceptions people have of the game, and what that means, like, when i write fanfic...
does my interpretation of coerthas align with other peoples' interpretations of coerthas? probably not. that’s something that’s deeply distressing, as a writer and as someone who prefers to have control, but i don’t know...
17. Instead of XYZ happening, I would have made ABC happen...
STARES INTO THE VOID it's it's too late for any of this
2 years ago i would have told you without hesitation that i wanted haurchefant to be alive and for him and francel to have eloped together, but now i just...
i've learned to play with the cards i've been dealt
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every 4th question
*_* Thank you so much!!
(yall about to learn way too much about me I’m sorry)
4. name three authors that were influential to your work andtell why
Well since I’ve done a crap job of reading published fictionfor months, these authors haven’t been read for at least…seven months or morenow. But I still think about their work a lot:
Haruki Murakami: His books 1Q84 and The Wind-Up Bird Chroniclewere so beautiful to me—I know some think he’s overrated (and I haven’t readKafka on the Shore I’m afraid to) but those two books are so many things I loveabout fiction—aspects of magical realism, rich sensory details, and justlengthy prose that is never boring to me. So much of the fantastical is in hiswriting, so many strong images coupled with emotions, it’s just a joy to readhim, and I try to put some similar level of strong imagery in my work partlybecause of his influence I think.
Jean M. Auel: I read her Earth’s Children series when I was13, again when I was 18, and since I was 22 I’ve been really wrapped up in it,though not as heavily as I was seven months ago—I still think about it a lotand miss the protagonist, who’s been a huge comfort to me over the years. Itinfluenced my first college major (anthropology) and was the strongestinfluence on my passion to be a writer. Her prose is also rich in detail, butmore in a “textbook” kind of way which I think most readers found boring, but Iloved it, it helped me get wrapped up in the prehistoric world Auel builds.Also gave me a passionate love for strong women healers who are independent yetstill multi-faceted. :) (sound familiar?)
Hayao Miyazaki: He’s most well-known as a director ofseveral beautiful animated films from Japan. But in 2012 I read his mangaNausicaa of the Valley of the Wind and honestly it changed my life. Anotherstrong woman as a protagonist, and also such a beautiful message behind theentire work taken as a whole. Only added fuel to the fire of my passion forpost-apocalyptic narratives, which influences my original fantasy writing alot. But also that manga is so much about transformation, and compassion, andthe strength of humanity, I feel like I try to put that strength in all mycharacters in some way, even in fanfiction. Nausicaa is such a beautifulcharacter in so many ways…I could write an essay (kind of have already but it’sjust a messy ramble and over three years old now lol).
8. what time are you most productive?
Umm unfortunately either right before I eat dinner (I’m notsuper hungry in the evenings, I only eat to take my medicine, and I hate howtired eating dinner usually makes me) or really late at night after I’ve wokenup from an unplanned nap. On weekends I love to get writing done in themornings, between a small breakfast and just some snacks for lunch, but thatdoesn’t happen as often as I want.
12. favorite place to write
On my bed with my cat next to me (the only place I’m ever onmy laptop honestly)
16. easiest verse to write
Is this referring to universe as in what fandom do I mostprefer to write in?? I hope I’m reading that right…if not you can correct me!But obviously rn I only write for Elementary…but I hope to explore fantasy AUs,including Pacific Rim and His Dark Materials! And of course my vampire AU whichwill be so so exciting for me to write… I just love fantasy, so I suppose that’seasiest for me.
If my mind is playing tricks on me and this question isreferring to POV or tense…I’m really confused.
20. favorite character to write
Well this one’s obvious…Joan Watson. I’ve projected myselfon her an embarrassing amount really, but also she inspires me. I’m so happythat I took the plunge and finally started writing fanfiction because of her.
24. favorite scene you’ve ever written
I haven’t written a lot of fic yet, but my favorite that I’veposted online is…The First Night. It’s the most I’ve gotten into Joan’s head Ithink, that’s probably why I like it so much. And it’s just the tip of theiceberg of all the closure fic I want to write (I guess others call it fix-itfic but I see closure fic as a bit different than fix-it) which is why I was sodriven to write fanfiction in the first place (for the first time ever, it was so scary).
28. worst review you ever got
Everyone commenting on my fics has been so kind! I have nocomplaints in that area! But I will say there was this workshop in college…ohit was a dark time. Anyone ever have those writing professors who just abhorgenre fiction and look down on it and of course all you want to write is genrefiction and ugh…Well I wrote a story with two vampires who were enemies, andthe protagonist I was writing, the ideas for her were in their infant stagesand I just took a risk…and it didn’t pay off. Everyone was confused, no one hadanything good to say…that I remember. It was no fun.
32. alternate title for (insert story title)
Since you didn’t choose a title I will choose one myself!>_
36. one-shot or multi-chaptered story?
To read? Multi-chaptered story all the way. I love lengthystories, I will gobble them up every time if it’s characters/pairings I love!But this doesn’t mean I dislike one-shots, I love one-shots. I love both reallyI can’t say I have a strong preference for multi-chapter, I just have alwaysloved long stories, I love spending a long time with characters and gettingcloser to them that way.
To write? Sad to say I suck at plot so one-shots are mydeal. Or vignettes, if we want to be flattering. (I’m sure there’s a differenceI just haven’t learned it yet.)
40. which one of your stories would you most like to see asa movie/series
*shuffles feet* Love Is Touching Souls (which is a WIP but Ihave several chapters planned) It would give me so much closure and thegreatest joy to see my Elementary AU played out on screen by the beautifulactors…(sans Mycrosoft of course we all know I hate him…except that moment whenJoan smacks him the face. Which is what really happened in 2x23.)
44. do you write linear or do you write future scenes if youfeel like it?
So far I prefer to write linear, but I’m so impatient andfrustrated with myself because of that…I feel like I can never get enough done!I do a lot of planning…and if I feel really strongly about a scene I’ll write asuper rough draft or a snippet of it. Several of my WIPs just popped up thatway…including most of Love Is Touching Souls.
48. three spoilers for (insert story title)
Well, uh, you get spoilers for the future chapters of LoveIs Touching Souls cuz that’s the only long fic I have going! (Besides the Vegasfic which I will never abandon I stg it’s just on hold!)
Spoiler 1 involves the roof of the brownstone post 3x24.(will never be as good as @disheveledcurls‘ “and miles to go before I sleep” - please go read it if you haven’t and comment she deserves it - but I had to tryand express my paltry headcanons, it’s the least Joan and Sherlock deserve fromme)
Spoiler 2 will involve Joan discovering Moriarty’s lettersand deep discussion with Sherlock about the difference between Joan andMoriarty, which y’know we really should’ve gotten in the show I mean c’mon.
Spoiler 3 involves Joan in Peril because I have to write itokay I have to. It was one of the first stories I came up with actually (afterthe very first fic I ever started that should be chapter 3 of LITS, whichinvolves Sherlock in Peril so I just love writing my faves getting hurt I’mmean. But I also love Joan in Dr. Watson Mode so I couldn’t resist).
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Landscapes, abstracts and architecture, a world of line and form, texture and atmospheric mood. A vision intended to evoke sensations, even emotions in the viewer, especially wonder, awe and appreciation of beauty. Camera in hand, this is the vision I seek to express through the lens.
Women on the Ganges, Rishikesh. From Ganga Calm.
It’s a vision which does not often include people, unless they are a feature of the landscape. My photographs may be intimate captures of nature, of the works of people, with elements of design, but with people, the glass third-eye I carry feels like an invasion when in close proximity to a human subject.
My friend and guide, Amit, on the Ganga River, Varanasi, India. From the post: The People Who Change the World
It’s only as I write this that I come to understand: it is not so much the invasion which unsettles me, but the intimacy. It is not so much that I am asking the subject to reveal themselves to me, but that I must open myself up to them. The glass between their eyes and mine is a lens which works both ways. The most beguiling intimacy a camera ever uncovers is the relationship between the subject and the photographer, looking eye-to-eye.
My Rishikesh Yogi, Rahul. From Inspiring Lights.
Most of these photographs from my month in India don’t attain this level of intimacy. Most people weren’t even aware of the camera. But I’m stretching, reaching out, getting more comfortable with exploring people as a subject.
Chandni Chowk market, Old Delhi. From The Wash Between the Detailed Lines.
It’s easier for me in countries like China and India, with human beings so abundant everywhere they become the landscape. The implied intimacy of proximity often overwhelms Westerners, feeling their personal space to be constantly under duress. In such a tumult of humanity, it’s easy enough to set up in the maelstrom and fire off frames with telephoto or even a normal lens; implied intimacy rendered in pixels.
Jewels and Pigeons, Varanasi. From Marker on My Way Home.
But that eye-to-eye through-the-lens, that’s a level of intimacy I still struggle with, I’m still developing in a growing appreciation for the intimacy this growth fosters. Easiest, of course, with people I’ve already developed a relationship with, shared experiences with. Introduction by camera? That’s much more difficult.
A Boy and His Bicycle, Varanasi. From The Look.
Sometimes, while framing a landscape or empty alleyway, someone enters and a moment of connection is captured, a moment which startles me with its intimacy. So startling, I’m compelled to set the lens aside after the shutter release, and offer an apologetic nod: so sorry to invade your space.
Ganga Angel, Varanasi. From The Angel
And then there’s this moment. A fleeting one. Literally, two ships passing in the night. Camera, with the right lens, already in hand. One brief opportunity for just a few frames. One of these frames renders perhaps the most perfect moment I’ve ever captured.
As the ships pass, and the photographic moment passes, I lower the camera. Only then does she look at me. The eye-to-eye has the emotional impact of a soul-to-soul. I feel touched by something divine.
Would that have been a better photograph than the one I have here? Perhaps. Perhaps not. Certainly, something of that very intimate connection would have been lost, both in the photographic sense and the personal connection. The lens would have been a filter between us.
I’m not sure I’d be willing to trade even that briefest moment of personal intimacy for a better photographic one. In this moment, I’m thinking not.
Intimate Strangers
She Ran, Bengali Tola, Old Varanasi, India. From Bengali Tola.
Angel of The Ganga Ganges River Varanasi Uttar Pradesh, India
Taken during travels, 2017
This week’s WordPress Weekly Photo Challenge is “2017 Favourites“. Nice. An end of the year retrospective on our favourite photographs of the year.
Even as I began reading the challenge particulars, I had several images in mind. As I read, however, the editors at WordPress added a second parameter: meaning. “Instead of a specific theme or topic, we invite you to share your most meaningful photo from 2017.” Well, that upped the stakes.
As I reconsidered my photographic options, I realized the best photograph I’ve shot this year is, in a few respects, also the most meaningful. The meaning I’ve chosen to write about here is a personal one.
And there’s a metaphorical level of meaning below the one I write explicitly about. It’s a personal journey as well as photographic.
Last week we found ourselves getting small, with Diminutive. This week, let’s take a closer look at People. Or find something else to inspire your creativity in this photograph of an Angel on the Ganga, in Varanasi, Uttar Pradesh, India.
The Pic and a Word Challenge is a weekly creativity prompt offered Sundays.
Each week I provide a photograph of mine along with a single word. The challenge? Use the pic and/or word as points of inspiration to create something — a photograph, a painting, prose, poetry, fiction, non-fiction, longread or just a few words. You are welcome to use these two elements (photograph and word) literally, thematically or metaphorically. If you create both images and words, all the better.
To participate:
Use any title you like
Your response can be words and/or an image
You may use my image in your post, or any image you have created
Place the challenge’s Pic (if you use it for inspiration) and Word prominently in your post
Mention that you are responding to the Pic and a Word Challenge
Add a link to this post in your response
To help us find your response — whether on WordPress, Instagram, Flicker, Tumblr, etc. — you can also:
Add a comment on this post to announce your response
Apply the tag/hashtag “Pic and a Word Challenge” or “#picandawordchallenge” to your post
Each week, I’ll list the previous week’s responses at the end of the new challenge. I may also share some on my social media: Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Tumblr, etc.
Last week’s challenge: Diminutive
Challenge #118 ~ Diminutive
The word for last week’s Pic and a Word Challenge #118 was Diminutive, along with this photograph of the crescent moon in a darkening sky over Bowen Island and Howe Sound in British Columbia, Canada.
Four bloggers got small this week for Diminutive. 😉 Thanks everyone! =)
Forest Memories, by Dancing Echoes
Diminutive, by WoollyMuses
Diminutive, by Stuff and what if…
Diminutive, by Temperature’s Rising
View all the Pic and a Word Challenges, including the current challenge, on the Pic and a Word Challenge tag page.
This fleeting moment. Camera, already in hand. One brief opportunity for just a few frames. Landscapes, abstracts and architecture, a world of line and form, texture and atmospheric mood. A vision intended to evoke sensations, even emotions in the viewer, especially wonder, awe and appreciation of beauty.
#beauty#India#intimacy#meaning#photography#Pic and a Word Challenge#postaday#relationships#reveal#Wordpress Photo Challenge
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FOR MY EYES ONLY: The challenges of writing meaningfully in a diary or journal
I close my eyes and take a deep breath in. The smell of the fresh, thick parchment and the texture of the leather binding in my hand carry me away from my well-lit bedroom. I find myself in a dark room with a small, wooden writing desk and nothing but a kerosene lamp for light. The faint scratch of my quill is audible against the paper as I quickly transcribe the events that have transpired that day. I picture myself saying the events aloud in my head as I select each word with care and purpose. My eyes fly open to begin writing, yet I'm faced with nothing … I'm back in my 21st-century room with a mechanical pen, staring at the empty page. I have no words.
A "book lover’s book"
I've always wanted to write a journal, a collection of daily entries encompassing all my raw, uncensored emotions. When did I first became interested in composing a diary? I have no idea. The precise moment when that interest became a desire, however, I can pinpoint in the summer of 2011. Kate Morton’s well-crafted The Distant Hours (A "book lover’s book," as I affectionately call it) had just been published and I couldn't put it down.
As I sat, enraptured in Morton’s story, I came across a paragraph that would have more of an impact on my aspiration to record my life's moments than I could've possibly imagined. It read, No two people will ever see or feel things in the same way. ... The challenge is to be truthful when you write. Don't approximate. Don't settle for the easiest combination of words. Go searching instead for those that explain exactly what you think. What you feel. Although I can't speak for its intention, the passage secured itself as a challenge in my mind. What I was writing about—good, bad, sad—didn’t matter, if I was able to express what it was I experienced and what I felt. This challenge has since made what should, theoretically, be a therapeutic pastime, slightly stressful. There are several studies and professionals who stress the therapeutic or otherwise beneficial properties of keeping a journal. A journal can inspire creativity, reduce anxiety and act as a confidante, and many believe that it can even lead to moments of personal growth and acceptance. Unfortunately, I have yet to experience any of these rewarding outcomes. Each time I attempt to record my thoughts or feelings about anything, I seem to lose all focus and lapse into an anxious state. I sit, for what feels like hours, trying to find the perfect combination of words to adequately describe how angry I was that someone cut me off in traffic or the tranquillity I feel as I drink my morning tea. Although I'm aware that what I’m writing is for my eyes only, I can’t seem to get past the urge to write as if I have an audience hanging on to my every word. I want the ideas to flow and connect, but despite my efforts, organic feelings and random thoughts just don’t seem to work that way.
Most journals aren't interesting
The problem, I've come to realize, is my love for romanticized readings of journals. In many of the "book lover’s books" that I adore, such as The Distant Hours, at least one or more of the characters are developed through a diary. The author describes their world with intrinsic detail and showcases how even the smallest instances can greatly affect their lives. Every time I read a new novel of this genre, I become attached to the beautifully phrased prose which carries with it clarity and and a high degree of emotion. These journals provide me with the chance to travel through time and experience a moment in someone else’s life as if I was present. My issue is my longing to express myself in a similar manner. I want my journal to be romantic in nature so that I, too, may relive moments of my own life. If I were to ask a group of individuals, most would agree that this isn't a true representation of what a journal is. Sure, there are moments of tender and eloquently phrased musings and description, but is every entry so articulately crafted? I would guess that the answer is "no." In the passages about feelings and experiences, most journals consist of uninteresting observances, personal beliefs and seemingly random spurts of creativity and nonsense. While its content may be deep, dark or inspiring, each diary itself is uncomplicated. Fancy words and perfect structure aren't required to create a state of nostalgia.
A change of mindset
After considerable reflection, I've determined that I need to alter the mindset with which I approach the pastime of writing in a journal. I must switch from desiring to compose a journal to wanting to write a truthful representation of different elements of myself. Although I don't believe I'll ever settle for the easiest combination of words, I must uncomplicate the process and learn how to express myself simply. Several beautifully crafted books and unique writing tools lie waiting for the moment that they can greedily soak up any ink I choose to introduce to the unmarked pages. My hope is that someday soon, I'll find myself at my small, wooden writing desk with a kerosene lamp, diligently writing something that, whether romantic or not, will hold meaning to me. «RELATED READ» CREATIVITY AND JOURNALING: Tools to enhance your journaling practice» images 1. Pixabay 2. Amazon 3. Pixabay Click to Post
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Goodbye 33. May 2017, El Paro and the Coming Storm
#timeisafiction
its hallucinations play with me all month long. There is chaos, more meetings than I can handle, and a collective frenetic energy that penetrates deeply. I’m here somewhere, in the middle ground between the familiar places of overwork and exhaustion practicing the fine art of stay(ing). Juggling commitments, dreams, everyday cray, needs to eat.sleep.laugh.cry.care. I welcome it with reverence at times. On most days though, I feel like I have a bunch of dropped balls on the floor all around me trying to keep from tripping as I concentrate on the remaining ones in the air.
I realize today is May’s great finale so I pick this one up. Blogging. Blogging feels like one of the easiest balls to drop and the hardest to pick up. Being here, in the always on community, grates against my training, my comfort, my pace of reflecting, processing and sharing.
Here, in Puerto Rico, our month opened with a majestic and traumatically diverse paro nacional. The morning, predawn hours—reserved for the most militant--were rainy and dark, as were the experiences of cacerolada a combative good morning wake up call for the Governor that reminded us of the violences that police offer without scrutiny, under the law, before the arrest(s). Still others, blocked the airport, entrails of the island’s tourist economy reminding the nation that to stop, we had to also disrupt the experience for those who quietly go on entering and leaving, slash the symbolic myth Puerto Rico lo hace mejor.
Even today, the 1st of May is a day that still sits uncomfortably inside me, just at the edge of my being, my current shape + self. I dream of widening our movement circles, of caring for the caretakers of justice, of our minds, of our bodies. Of healing. But that day, like so many others this month make clear a series of challenges to unite from the point of our differences.
So, I offer you a few observations in no particular order. Call it intuitive rambling. Or simply, a deadline. Ha. How’s that for contradictory slippage that represents the distance between #timeisafiction and #internalizedcapitalism?
It hurts to grow.
Radical longings are made tangible in their presence. I march to with La Cole to the convergence. When we arrive, the first clash is sonic. Macharan macharan conmigo no te equivoces/candela te voy a dar/no me mires/no me toques drowned out temporarily by our national macharran marc and stares that reflect varying degrees of contempt and curiosity. Through force of habit, I drop out of consignas to sing the lyrics. Preciosa te llevo dentro …I feel a distinct friction between that world and this one, where unions, and others are grouped in t-shirts of the same color look at us.
Let it expand.
Others spoke of moments of unison. Nos reconocimos con capuchas y to’. Although we are urged to turn away from the police who are activating their anti-motin act from the mainstage--No se dejan provocar. Repeated slowly and emphatically, getting the exact opposite result--.
As some push me in an effort to run, I like others, head in the direction of the conflict. Many arrive to support one another. Vinegar, seattle, water, attention. Later, expressions of discontent and ya basta, take down the glass houses. A little taste of their own medicine. But the government responds with an outpouring of support that makes you question the claim that austerity is the only way.
Pisando nueve meses.
Amidst everything else, I have been entering a new stage of work: closer than ever to moving in to the first homespace for CEPA. I feel ready to burst, final stages of the preparations, soon it will be time to play. I feel a certain irony (or is it synchronicity) that this experiment for creating an actual solidarity economy projects a shared launch date with JCF taking power.
Until then, I use it when I can to train in the difficult work of connecting. If May has reminded me of anything, that’s the only work that is. Connecting. I am still in awe of a student movement that has done that again and again. In the scope of their vision, in their demands, proposals and process. Connecting to the unimaginable—a glimpse, a grasp, a daring.
And last but not least, Oscar finally came home. I wasn’t one of the ones who fought for his release and I shied away from the fanfare and celebration feeling like a fraud at first. I respected him but I didn’t feel him. Until I stood with others on the bridge with women who met monthly, reminding us all of him locked away—nearly 36 years for defending an idea—that Puerto Rico might be free. When he arrived on Sunday, I surprised myself when I silently cried, salt water in the air and on my face. His clarity was a palpable presence: it had survived those years of imprisonment, no taste of bitterness in the air. Just healing.
Oscar radiated a clarity, a trust wrapped in gentle conviction. He spoke like a Diasporican. And then I saw myself too. Going beyond ideology. Solnit’s prose like a whisper encouraging me to push on. When you fight, sometimes you win, when you don’t, you always lose.
These are moments where I witness the beauty in those words. There is so much to win. The falling away of false pretenses. The power we liberate together.
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