#THEY ARE NOT ON THE SAME LEVEL

[spaceoutdreamer]

Garçon - Koxie

In French, ç is pronounced as a ss sound while a regular c is (usually) a k sound. "Con" means dickhead, "gare" (in this context) means watch out. Basically, this song uses a pun that can't really be translated.

Earlier, I was driving on my scooter in Paris From a car, at the red light, some guy tells me "Hey ma'am, what time is it ?" I answer "12 pm" He tells me "Hey ma'am, you're crazy hot, how about you give me a lil treat ?" His buddies laugh, I didn't understand at the time. I say "Hey dude, you don't speak to people that way, you wouldn't like people talking to your mother that way." The dude looks at me with a guard doig's face and goes "Ayo, don't talk about my mom or I'll fuck you up" I answer "Calm down Alphonse. I don't know you, you attack me, what's up with that lack of finesse ? Nobody told you to treat women like princesses ?" He goes "Yeah, fuck you !" I tell him "You're not, that's where the issue lays"

Did you know that if you take the cedilla out of of garçon, you're left with garcon, and watch out for dickheads girl, watch out for dickheads Watch out for dickheads, watch our for dickheads that lose their cedillas If you take the cedilla out of of garçon, you're left with garcon, and watch out for dickheads girl, watch out for dickheads Watch out for dickheads, watch our for dickheads that lose their cedillas

I go my way, next light I hear "Hey slut, I can take you whenever !" Yet again it's Alphonse with his stupid face I tell him "Come on, you're digging your own grave, that's cringe. Can't believe you dude, get real ! You think you're Tony Montana, you don't even have pubes." He says "Stop being crass, see where I'm gonna put it in" "You're calling me crass ? Talk about pots and kettles. What a joke. Who do you think you are ? Stop that now" I get off, he gets off, I tell him "Your head's a mess. What are you gonna do now ? Aren't you in a situation. I want an apology, I'm waiting, and I'm not leaving without it." He tells me "No, YOU apologise you crazy witch" "That's a good one, I gave you the time, I shouldn't have bothered"

Did you know that if you take the cedilla out of of garçon, you're left with garcon, and watch out for dickheads girl, watch out for dickheads Watch out for dickheads, watch our for dickheads that lose their cedillas If you take the cedilla out of of garçon, you're left with garcon, and watch out for dickheads girl, watch out for dickheads Watch out for dickheads, watch our for dickheads that lose their cedillas

Here's how some boys talk. How shameful. They deserve a good talking to. Wanna play ? Let's play I tell him "Take your pants off. Lots of talking, not a lot of doing You asked me for a blowjob." Suddenly Alphonse snaps out of it. He stands down and tells me "Ok, fine, leave me alone, sorry." I tell him "Good, you look less stupid. Talking to women that way isn't normal There's a serious education issue. And even so, I'm sure you're not such a bad guy." He tells me "You're right, I feel stupid ! My buddies are pressuring me !" I tell him "Ok, no need to cry !" That's the last thing I needed Alphonse breaks down in my arms I tell him "You look like you need some loving. Come here, give auntie a kiss"

Did you know that if you take the cedilla out of of garçon, you're left with garcon, and watch out for dickheads girl, watch out for dickheads Watch out for dickheads, watch our for dickheads that lose their cedillas If you take the cedilla out of of garçon, you're left with garcon, and watch out for dickheads girl, watch out for dickheads Watch out for dickheads, watch our for dickheads that lose their cedillas

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

the fact that shakespeare was a playwright is sometimes so funny to me. just the concept of the "greatest writer of the English language" being a random 450-year-old entertainer, a 16th cent pop cultural sensation (thanks in large part to puns & dirty jokes & verbiage & a long-running appeal to commoners). and his work was made to be watched not read, but in the classroom teachers just hand us his scripts and say "that's literature"

just...imagine it's 2450 A.D. and English Lit students are regularly going into 100k debt writing postdoc theses on The Simpsons screenplays. the original animation hasn't even been preserved, it's literally just scripts and the occasional SDH subtitles.txt. they've been republished more times than the Bible

[catmask]

does anyone have like an anti aesthetic. like something you look at and can recognize as a complete fashion/interior design/artistic movement and understand it but it makes you shudder seeing it. i am not talking like “its morally bad” “its poorly structured” like just sheerly devoid of joy for you actually invites a repulse response.

[bacchuschucklefuck]

typical tavern scene

[gaytheropods]

I love you garbage truck workers I love you janitors I love you waste water treatment workers I love you sanitation workers I love you

[steakmakesnoises]

Find this moment from that episode funny for some reason.

[curioscurio]

thin people get called "too skinny" like once growing up and then think they're allowed to clown on any post talking about fatphobia. they want skinnyphobia to exist soooooo bad.

[inkskinned]

the thing is there's like, a point of oversaturation for everything, and it's why so many things get dropped after a few minutes. and we act like millennials or gen z kids "have short attention spans" but... that's not quite it. it's more like - we did like it. you just ruined it.

capitalism sees product A having moderate success, and then everything has to come out with their "own version" of product A (which is often exactly the same). and they dump extreme amounts of money and environmental waste into each horrible simulacrum they trot out each season.

now it's not just tiktokkers making videos; it's that instagram and even fucking tumblr both think you want live feeds and video-first programming. and it helps them, because videos are easier to sneak native ads into. the books coming out all have to have 78 buzzwords in them for SEO, or otherwise they don't get published. they are making a live-action remake of moana. i haven't googled it, but there's probably another marvel or starwars something coming out, no matter when you're reading this post.

and we are like "hi, this clone of project A completely misses the point of the original. it is soulless and colorless and miserable." and the company nods and says "yes totally. here is a different clone, but special." and we look at clone 2 and we say "nope, this one is still flat and bad, y'all" and they're like "no, totally, we hear you," and then they make another clone but this time it's, like, a joyless prequel. and by the time they've successfully rolled out "clone 89", the market is incredibly oversaturated, and the consumer is blamed because the company isn't turning a profit.

and like - take even something digital like the tumblr "live streaming" function i just mentioned. that has to take up server space and some amount of carbon footprint; just so this brokenass blue hellsite can roll out a feature that literally none of its userbase actually wants. the thing that's the kicker here: even something that doesn't have a physical production plant still impacts the environment.

and it all just feels like it's rolling out of control because like, you watch companies pour hundreds of thousands of dollars into a remake of a remake of something nobody wants anymore and you're like, not able to afford eggs anymore. and you tell the company that really what you want is a good story about survival and they say "okay so you mean a YA white protagonist has some kind of 'spicy' love triangle" and you're like - hey man i think you're misunderstanding the point of storytelling but they've already printed 76 versions of "city of blood and magic" and "queen of diamond rule" and spent literally millions of dollars on the movie "Candy Crush Killer: Coming to Eat You".

it's like being stuck in a room with a clown that keeps telling the same joke over and over but it's worse every time. and that would be fine but he keeps fucking charging you 6.99. and you keep being like "no, i know it made me laugh the first time, but that's because it was different and new" and the clown is just aggressively sitting there saying "well! plenty of people like my jokes! the reason you're bored of this is because maybe there's something wrong with you!"

[namarikonda]

Jesus showing off his top surgery scars to the boys (John. 20:27)

[nine-aetharia]

i need swifties to shut the fuck up about 'oh so kendrick's disses can be analyzed for hidden meanings but we can't do the same for taylor songs' yeah bc that's not isolated to kendrick. subliminals and entendres abound in rap. taylor swift songs are as deep as a puddle while youre wearing flip flops and your feet still arent wet

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

I know those eyes.

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[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

i vote that next year instead of reading Dracula we do a Jeeves & Wooster Book Club. those two never got the rabid tumblr shipping fandom they deserved (disqualified for the sheer technicality of being published a century too soon). we must correct this injustice

[hekxate]

goro akechi is the most normal man in japan

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt 329

Bruce was admittedly suspicious when Talia requests a meeting, and is admittedly still upset with the entire hiding Damian’s existence from him for literal years. But he also admits that he just… has to take a moment. 

“Run that by me again please?” He had to have misheard, right? Or gotten drugged by something maybe. 

Talia sighs, sounding just as tired as he felt. “Father’s tea supplier has moved to Gotham after an argument, and he wishes to discuss the agreement of him not entering the city- to speak with said vendor.” 

[ofswordsandpens]

I fear that "fire bending didn't come easy to zuko" and "zuko isn't a prodigy" (both true) has somehow snowballed into "zuko is a bad or at best average fire bender".... which simply isn't true, especially by the end of book 3

[causalityparadoxes]

The Master always bringing in diagetic music, (I Can't Decide, Hey Missy, Rasputin, etc) because they've always been a little miffed that THEY couldn't hear the non-diagetic theme music like the Doctor could.

Imagine your best friend swore up and down they could sometimes hear situationally relavent music. Yet you were stuck with a 4 beat pounding in your head or nothing.

Like sooooo unfair. Hand me the aux, I'm leveling the playing field