#without doing my research and providing real ways to help

[inkskinned]

the thing is there's like, a point of oversaturation for everything, and it's why so many things get dropped after a few minutes. and we act like millennials or gen z kids "have short attention spans" but... that's not quite it. it's more like - we did like it. you just ruined it.

capitalism sees product A having moderate success, and then everything has to come out with their "own version" of product A (which is often exactly the same). and they dump extreme amounts of money and environmental waste into each horrible simulacrum they trot out each season.

now it's not just tiktokkers making videos; it's that instagram and even fucking tumblr both think you want live feeds and video-first programming. and it helps them, because videos are easier to sneak native ads into. the books coming out all have to have 78 buzzwords in them for SEO, or otherwise they don't get published. they are making a live-action remake of moana. i haven't googled it, but there's probably another marvel or starwars something coming out, no matter when you're reading this post.

and we are like "hi, this clone of project A completely misses the point of the original. it is soulless and colorless and miserable." and the company nods and says "yes totally. here is a different clone, but special." and we look at clone 2 and we say "nope, this one is still flat and bad, y'all" and they're like "no, totally, we hear you," and then they make another clone but this time it's, like, a joyless prequel. and by the time they've successfully rolled out "clone 89", the market is incredibly oversaturated, and the consumer is blamed because the company isn't turning a profit.

and like - take even something digital like the tumblr "live streaming" function i just mentioned. that has to take up server space and some amount of carbon footprint; just so this brokenass blue hellsite can roll out a feature that literally none of its userbase actually wants. the thing that's the kicker here: even something that doesn't have a physical production plant still impacts the environment.

and it all just feels like it's rolling out of control because like, you watch companies pour hundreds of thousands of dollars into a remake of a remake of something nobody wants anymore and you're like, not able to afford eggs anymore. and you tell the company that really what you want is a good story about survival and they say "okay so you mean a YA white protagonist has some kind of 'spicy' love triangle" and you're like - hey man i think you're misunderstanding the point of storytelling but they've already printed 76 versions of "city of blood and magic" and "queen of diamond rule" and spent literally millions of dollars on the movie "Candy Crush Killer: Coming to Eat You".

it's like being stuck in a room with a clown that keeps telling the same joke over and over but it's worse every time. and that would be fine but he keeps fucking charging you 6.99. and you keep being like "no, i know it made me laugh the first time, but that's because it was different and new" and the clown is just aggressively sitting there saying "well! plenty of people like my jokes! the reason you're bored of this is because maybe there's something wrong with you!"

[aksm]

People knock on Rhoam for being a bad dad cuz he's distant and stern to little Zelda and say how Rauru is the goat (heh) for taking her in like his own daughter. Like Zelda had her real parental connection with Sonia and Rauru. But frankly that's a little reductive.

Rauru literally descended from the heavens, married a priest, started a kingdom. Man didn't really know much strife yet. There's no looming threat of calamity or prophecy yet. Things are peaceful. Things are fine. Things are great. Zelda dropped in during this time, talking about a doom that's going to happen tens of thousands of years in the future.

This sad, lost princess.

Of course any reasonable person would take her in and calm her and tell her she is fine and listen and support her.

Rhoam not being able to be this kind of figure for Zelda is tragic. Just read this poor man's journal entries:

"It has been a year and three months since her mother passed. Perhaps she is held back by heartache too deep to heal. If the Ganon prophecy wasn't looming over our heads, I would tell her to take her time... To wait until she is ready. But our situation is dire and leaves no room for weakness—even on behalf of my beloved daughter. My heart breaks for Zelda, but I must act as a king, not a father. I must order her to train relentlessly at the fountain." Pg 4.

"In truth, I understand Zelda's feelings. Painfully so. She lost her mother, her teacher, before she could learn from her. Ten pointless years of self-training, without so much as a book or note to help her find her way... Those in the castle talk behind her back. And I, her only family, scold her for her shortcomings. No wonder she wishes to hide away in her beloved relic research. I'd love nothing more than to console her... But I must stay strong. She MUST fulfill her duty, just as we all must. Even if she comes to despise me." Pg 6.

"I have been told my Zelda went to the Spring of Wisdom... This will likely be her last chance. If she is unable to awaken her power at Lanayru, all hope is truly lost. If she comes back without success, then I shall speak kindly with her. Scolding is pointless now. I forced 10 years of training on her... and after all that, it seems her power will stubbornly awaken some other way. Perhaps I should encourage her to keep researching her beloved relics. They may just lead her to answers I can't provide. For now, I sit anxiously, more a father than a king in this moment. I sit and await my daughter's return." Pg 7. (He fucking dies and never gives Zelda this bit of closure uuuugggghhhhhhh Zelda I'm so sorry Rhoam I'm so sorry)

It sucks because most people remember the cutscenes (duh it's more immersive and important) and in the cutscenes of the first game Rhoam was mostly shown as being stern and mean to babygirl Zelda, who is closed fists explaining herself to him at the verge of tears. And in contrast everyone in the first royal family of hyrule in the second game treated her with such kindness and we can see how happy she was being there with them.

Rhoam was shackled by duty. By prophecy. By the looming calamity. And from the day he named his daughter 'Zelda' he shackled her as well.

And what does Zelda do with these shackles? She accepts them. She tolerates them. Because she loves her father and her kingdom and knows there's a power dormant in her that can stop the calamity that she must do her best to unlock. She does this dutifully. She does all the training, she does everything that is required.

But it still doesn't unlock. So she tries other ways. She isn't just going after the 'relics' because she's scholarly and nerdy and wants to learn about them. She does it because she's pragmatic. She knows her sacred sealing power isn't present in her. She knows she might not be able to control it or even unlock it in time.

So she tries this alternative approach. The Divine Beasts, the guardians. Ancient tech that was used to prevent the calamity of their time. And she awakened the tech. And her father chose the champions for each divine beast. And they were all prepared. And it's all thanks to Zelda.

And then... Fucking tragedy again. Ganon probably learned his lesson from the last time he was thwarted and immediately went for the tech, corrupting it and turning it against the new users. Against Zelda.

It's never really stated how fast it all turned to shit when the tech betrayed them (or maybe I don't remember) but every account points to it being almost overnight. The champions died. Rhoam died. And suddenly, suddenly Zelda unlocks her sealing magic.

I always always hate the literary trope of using tragedy to unlock a great power that could've actually stopped the tragedy from happening in the first place.

And it's no different in BOTW. I hate that Zelda had to go through all this to unlock her powers.

And then what happens next?

She's stuck in limbo (in an almost mocking parallel to Rauru in the next game with his imprisoning arm) holding Ganon back. For a hundred years.

This young woman had gone through so much only to be trapped with a calamity seeking to destroy Hyrule for a century.

Does she know her father died in the war? Does she know the champions died in battle? Would she know Link would survive in the Shrine of Resurrection? Would she know how long it would all take? The century she would have to wait?

I think she didn't. I think it all happened too fast. I think ultimately, she decided a stalemate with ganon was an agreeable outcome. I think in her mind she probably thought she failed Hyrule. When the divine beasts turned she must have been distraught. Distraught might not even cover it tbh. But at least... At least when the kingdom was brought to it's knees by the corrupted tech and was waiting for the final blow, she had the ability to ensure the final blow never came.

And oh boy I have a looot more to talk about regarding Tears of the Kingdom. But I do want to have a couple of more playthroughs of it to really formulate what I want to say.

[writerthreads]

How to write a gripping fight scene

By Writerthreads on Instagram

Context

Provide the readers with preliminary details about the basics:

When is the fight? Where is the fight? Who are the characters involved in it?

Before you write the scene, it would be helpful to pre-plan the events and know the basic "itinerary" of the fight. This could be how it was initiated, which characters fight each other and how, and the way the fight ends.

Identify the backstory

The key to how to write a fight scene or battle scene is Goal, Motivation and Conflict (GMC). 

Ask yourself:

Why is this fight or battle taking place? (This supplies motivations, what each fighter or army has to gain or lose)

What each party wants (the goals). Goals may differ for the same conflict. One soldier may want to prove themselves worthy of promotion, for example. Another may just want to survive to see family or a lover back home. In a battle scene, what does the unit want, versus the individual?

What are the potential conflicts in the scene? For example, an argument might break out within ranks, or a sadistic leader might find themselves without aid at the peak of battle because their troops secretly despise them. A single, larger conflict could have smaller, breakaway conflicts that add further, lesser tensions to an already dramatic scene.

(From NowNovel)

Use characterisation in action

A fight scene can seem long and boring. To spice things up, you can provide readers with a bit more insight to the character as they fight.

Why does the character make the choices that they make in the fight?

How does each choice reinforce their characterization?

How does each choice impact their internal and/ or external goals?

Is this conflict getting the character closer or further away from their goals? How?

What are the stakes for each character? What do they stand to win? What will they lose?

What type of fighter is the character? What are their physical or mental abilities? (Remember that not every protagonist will be a trained assassin, so they’re prone to make sloppy mistakes during a fight.)

Use the fight scene to reveal necessary information about the characters. Be sure to give the reader a glimpse into the character’s soul and not just into their fighting skills.

(From NYBookEditors)

Use all the senses

To make the scene truly gripping, you have to make it visceral. Hit the readers with all the senses other than just sight. Sounds and textiles are particularly helpful and make the scene much more memorable.

So, next time you want to write one person's sword hitting another, you can describe the clang of the two steel pieces hitting each other, the smell of fresh blood in the air, and how heavy the sword welder's arm feels after parrying for ages.

Know the limits of each weapon and magic (if applicable)

Before you start writing, do some research about the "code of conduct" fighters in your time period had and how the weapons work. If you're very dedicated, you could try some classes in martial arts or fencing to get a rough idea of what the specific fight scene should feel like.

The ending

Let the readers know what the results of the fight are. Did one side clearly win? Were the results unclear (not in the sense of bad writing but of a draw-like scenario), or was it a Pyrrhic victory that incurred so much loss that it wasn't worth it?

One pet peeve of mine is a fight that ends when a Super Boss Weapon is revealed and ends the fight immediately. It's a quick way to finish the scene with no hassle, but in my opinion, it seems lazy and makes me wonder why the Super Boss Weapon wasn't used in the beginning. Unless it's justified, eg. the Super Boss Weapon had to be charged up, I get very mad when it happens. (But this opinion is very personal and you can obviously ignore it!)

Conclusion and disclaimer

Hopefully these tips will help you pen the perfect fight scene! I have minimal experience in fight scenes and all the fighting I do in real life is fencing (badly).

And as always, our tips are just tips and not rules -- you obviously don't need to follow them since they're just a guide to make your writing better! Good luck in writing your fight scene! :)

Sources: NowNovel, NYBookEditors

[cemeterything]

So, I really like body horror and horror in general, but I’m also physically and mentally disabled, and I tend to notice a lotta ableist/eugenicist folk flocking to the horror genre. Do you notice that too? Or am I just like, paranoid?

Also, do you have any suggestions for horror movies (especially body horror ones) that AREN’T oozing with Hollywood flavoured ableism? Would really appreciate it bc I’ve been getting so dispassionate about the genre lately thanks to certain kinds of fans.

i don't think you're paranoid, there are definitely people who engage with horror in ways that can have ableist implications and be very upsetting if you actually experience those reactions to your own conditions in real life, because for you it's not just fiction, it's your lived experience. the line between horror and ableism (and other forms of bigotry, like homophobia, transphobia, racism, etc.) can be a very fine one, and it's important for people who enjoy horror to be self aware and willing to listen. and at the same time, there are disabled people (and queer people, and people of color, and people from all kinds of marginalized groups) who find comfort and empowerment in horror and reclaim and make use of it to express their lived experiences. a lot of horror fans are disabled. i'm one of them, you're one of them, and i know there are more than a few on this site and in the world at large, enough to form communities. i'm friends with some of them. it's a complex issue.

the way i see it, you can't control your instinctive reactions to seeing something you're not used to or expecting, which horror often uses to its advantage to shock a response out of you, sometimes with ableist implications. you can, however, become more comfortable through exposure and learn to think critically about and control how you respond outwardly, especially if you're prepared to have those experiences, which in choosing to engage with horror you probably are unless you're being tricked or forced into it. so if you're a horror fan and want to avoid (or minimize) being ableist, take care not to let portrayals of mental and physical disabilities in fiction create misconceptions of what those conditions are actually like in real life. it's horror; it's not usually intended to be an accurate or flattering depiction (and even horror that DOES portray disabilities respectfully will still likely reflect experiences specific to the creator that aren't entirely accurate to actually living with them, because nobody's experiences are completely universal, and it's fiction). use it as an opportunity to learn more. do research, or talk to people if you have anyone willing to share their experiences with you. unpack your fear and sit with it and examine it. try to understand it so you can control it instead of letting it control you. thought crimes aren't real and don't harm anyone, but how you outwardly express yourself is something you can change and improve if you become aware of any issues. horror can help dig up those issues and get you to confront and consider them, and that's worth making use of.

that last part is directed more at horror fans who aren't disabled, but i included it because i hope it might be helpful in making you feel more comfortable and secure that there are ways to engage with horror without being ableist about it, and people who do so. unfortunately i don't have any recommendations because i think that horror is very personal and my ideas of what does or doesn't make good horror might be completely different from yours, so i'm unsure i could provide you with what you're looking for. i hope this was helpful to hear, though.

[khaire-traveler]

Hello, I am from Gaza, due to the shortage of medicine in Gaza, my mother who is a type 1 diabetic and was supposed to undergo urgent eye surgery, has not been able to get insulin or any medical care for the past three months. . Some members of my family fled to the southernmost part of Gaza (Rafah) in tents. But my parents and sisters have nowhere else to stay. They are forced to stay in the Nuseirat refugee camp, which has been bombed since the beginning of Christmas. "I am on my knees asking for your donations. Please help me. where you can.

Goal: $700

**"DO NOT DONATE TO THIS PERSON; THEY ARE MOST LIKELY A SCAMMER!!! DO DONATE TO ORGANIZATIONS SUCH AS THE PALESTINE CHILDREN'S RELIEF FUND!!!***

All the casual readers need to know is do not donate to this person; they are almost certainly a scammer (I say this after looking into it further). Scammer, please, by all means, continue reading. I'd love to hear your defense. c:

Let's dissect this, friends. One incorrect piece of information at a time.

List of Scammer Red Flags Within This Ask

This account has quite a few posts, but all of them are reblogs dated only up to three days ago. The only original post is their pinned post, and even that was posted three days ago. They even reblogged sending this very same ask to another person who asked for a link, as they did not give one. This, too, was dated three days ago. This is fishy to me.

After looking into your claims about having a Type 1 Diabetic mother who needed "urgent eye surgery" without any access to insulin for supposedly three months, I doubt the validity of your statement. It sounds like your mother has pretty severe diabetes, seeing that she needed urgent eye surgery. Sounds like she's reached the criticality of risking blindness as a complication. That's pretty intense, and I highly doubt she would last three months without insulin. "Without insulin, people with T1D will die from hyperglycemia within days or weeks." She is no longer with us. Why does she need money for treatment if she is deceased?

This is a very real article discussing the very real consequences of the fall of Gaza's healthcare system. There is no healthcare system in place currently - nothing substantial or official. There are freelance doctors providing support where they can, humanitarian organizations with their limited authority and ability attempting to provide aid, and medical professionals of all kinds trying their damnedest to put their skills to use in ways they've never had to before. So I ask you, where the fuck is this money going? Are you going to pay ANERA $700 for your deceased mother's insulin?

Seems you have done your research on these tent and refugee camp locations. However, there was an unfortunate airstrike on the Nuseirat refugee camp in early March. From my understanding, it may no longer be standing at all. Even if it is, I doubt, very much so, that you are there. I'm not sure where you are, but I feel it is not there. And where are you posting from, if I may ask? I'm curious how you've gotten internet access. Although I'm aware it's possible, from my understanding, it's extremely difficult to come by.

The Internet thing leads us into our fifth point. How will you access this money? If you were to say, run out of Internet connection, where would this $700 go? How will you get it out of your PayPal account? From your local refugee camp ATM?

PayPal does not work in Palestine, dumbass. You are as bright as a black hole and twice as dense.

-

If you need genuine help, I'm sorry, but this isn't the right way to ask for it. I wish I could do more for you. I wish I could go there myself and give you the relief that you need. I'm not sure what money could do for you in Gaza, especially when medical care is literally impossible to find with many doctors having, unfortunately, passed away and many more fleeing the country, but if you're real, I hope you receive the care that you need. I hope you find somewhere safe to reside.

But I do not think you need help. I think you are someone preying on the kindness of others, taking advantage of a goddamn genocide to earn some extra money. Your money is soaked in the blood of innocents. Innocents who could've used it themselves. Scammer, you disgust me. Children have fucking died while you were busy trying to earn some extra cash, profiting from their suffering. Fuck you, truly. There's a special place in the deep, deep depths of the afterlife, waiting to drag you kicking and screaming to the consequences of your actions. I hope you regret this scam. I hope it haunts you.

[gumnut-logic]

Along the Way (Part 7 and The End)

Sweetapple | Dear Mr Tracy | Along the way - Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7

It's finished! ::runs around the room like a loon:: Though I have to say that I doubt this will be the last we see of Mr Sweetapple as there are several threads that need a good neat tie up :D

All the wonderful thanks to @onereyofstarlight for staying up extra late and answering my poke across the Tasman Sea for a last minute read. I hope Alex gives you some nice sleep ::hugs tight::

Also, special thanks to all of you for supporting my geeky fanboy Alex :D There will be more as someone sent me some OC asks about Alex and I've realised that the only way I can answer them is by writing fic. (some other OCs of mine might pop up in fic at some point,too, for that exact same reason) ::so many hugs to all of you for being so kind to me::

But anyway, I will stop my excited rambling and present you with the last chapter of this fic....which has taken so long to write - so many apologies. Though I am excited that I'm writing again :D

I hope you enjoy this :D

-o-o-o-

Alexander Sweetapple’s head was spinning.

Not so much from the concussion he had no doubt he had, thank you, Mr Holographic Scott Tracy, but more from the fact that Virgil had just kissed him.

Not Mr Virgil Tracy, Head of Research and Development at Tracy Industries, no….more ‘ohmigod, I finally found you and you’re alive, I want to hug and kiss your brains out’ Virgil Tracy.

The man was covered in concrete dust and grime, there was more grey than blue on his uniform bar the scratched patches where his now discarded exosuit had sat.

Alex had proof Virgil had hugged him via all the dusty patches on his damp clothes, on his arms, and in his hair.

Virgil Tracy had hugged and kissed him.

For real.

Alex stood beside his mum while Virgil assessed the condition of her ankle and she went about embarrassing her son every way possible.

To be honest, it had been such a day that she was welcome to show Virgil Alex’s naked baby pictures for all he cared. She was safe and that was all important.

A glance over at the remains of the museum building prompted his heart to add a few extra beats per minute to its routine.

Alex let his jaw drop as he watched the roof float away.

Oh god.

“Alex?”

Virgil’s voice was so rich and deep.

“Alex?” And then Virgil grabbed him. Was he trying to hug him again. That would be nice. “Whoa! I think you need to sit down.”

Okay.

He folded himself smoothly down onto the pavement beside his mum.

“Hey, honey, look at me.” Her fingers were suddenly in his hair. “Allie, how the hell did you do all that with a head injury?” She peered closely at him. “Virgil, what do your scanners say?”

And yes, Virgil was waving a yellow light over Alex. “Concussion, bruising…” He frowned. “You’re both wet. You’ve been in the river?”

“Nearly drowned. My foot got stuck and Allie pulled me out. Some water, possibly sewage, may have been inhaled. My recommendation is to watch for symptoms of infection. In both of us.” Dr Sweetapple was in the house.

He turned to Virgil only to find his friend’s eyebrows fully deployed.

They were very nice eyebrows.

Virgil caught his stare. “Thunderbird One, I need to leave the danger zone. Ten minutes there and back for patient transport.”

“FAB, Thunderbird Two. Make it quick, we need your help in the industrial sector.” A pause. “How’s Alex?”

“Concussion, but well enough…and safe.” Virgil still had his eyes.

“Good to hear. Thunderbird One out.”

“What are you doing, Virgil?” The words slipped out without thought.

Virgil looked down at his wrist control poking it. “You both need medical supervision. I’m providing it for you.”

A good hundred metres away, Thunderbird Two rose up on her struts and her module door slid smoothly open. Two hoverstretchers darted out across the road, gliding around obstacles until they reached Virgil’s side. He pulled out a control surface and reconfigured them into hoverchairs. “Sorry to rush this, but time is short. Alex, stay put while I help your mother.” He held up a gloved hand and Alex was forced to settle back and obey.

Besides, the world was spinning again, and after all, Virgil was technically his boss.

He let his head fall into his hand and closed his eyes, suddenly ever so tired.

So this was what an adrenalin drop felt like.

Ugh.

“Alex?” Virgil’s voice was soft and his gloved hand gentle on his arm. That was really nice. “Alex? You with me?”

He blinked. Oh. “Yeah.”

“Let’s get you up.” Virgil nudged him, both hands holding his arms to steady him.

The world wobbled, but a few steps and Virgil had him snug and safe, strapped into the hover stretcher…chair…whatever the hell it was.

Virgil was running, Alex and his mother beside him, until they were all swallowed by the green of Thunderbird Two.

At some point, Virgil must has triggered the chair back into a bed because Alex was lying down and Virgil hovering over him, once again with a scanner flickering yellow light. “You can go to sleep, Alex. You’re okay and you’re safe.” A gloved hand gently brushed away the hair from Alex’s forehead. He knew this should mean something, but he was so tired.

Thunderbird green danced as his eyelids drifted closed.

Somewhere something was roaring just like a Thunderbird launching, but he had no energy to care.

-o-o-o-

Jeff stepped into the elevator only to almost collide with his mother. “Mom?”

“I’m meeting Thunderbird Two.”

“Why?” Was Virgil hurt? Why hadn’t John told him?

A hand on his arm quelled the sudden panic. “Virgil is fine. We have visitors.”

“Who?” Did he have to draw the information out bit by bit?

“Do you remember Alexander Sweetapple?”

“Of course, I do. Gordon thinks Virgil might be…interested.”

“He is.” She held up a finger so close to Jeff’s face, his eyes crossed. “And you are not going to say a thing. Yes, he’s breaking protocol, but he has good reason.” She looked away and let her finger drop. “The poor boy has been terrified all day. Thank god, they finally found Alex. And I don’t blame him for not wanting to let him out of his sight.” His mother stared up at Jeff with all the fire he knew she possessed. “Your son is bringing home his first romantic interest ever and you are not going to spout security blather all over him. This is our house and we can have guests. Especially important guests.”

Jeff took a step back. “I wasn’t going to say anything!” Virgil was bringing home Alex? As a love interest? “What the hell happened?” He really needed to speak to John about keeping him updated. He knew his orbiting son was selective, but this was ridiculous.

The elevator doors opened and his mother glared at him. “Something good. Don’t ruin it.” She stomped off into Two’s hangar, detouring into the medical supply cupboard on the way, just as the hangar doors started their opening sequence.

Jeff stepped cautiously out of the elevator. He had no idea what warranted his mother’s ire. Okay, maybe he had had some words with his eldest at one point, but that was nearly a decade ago.

His priorities were a little different these days.

Two roared in, a little faster than the norm. Virgil was obviously in a hurry. She spun on her turntable and the moment she settled, her forward hatch was lowered, Virgil standing between two hoverchairs.

Jeff hurried after his mother, cursing his cane, as Virgil strode with the two chairs towards them.

“Grandma, this is Doctor Lolly Sweetapple. Doctor Sweetapple, this is my grandmother, Doctor Sally Tracy, she and my father will be taking over your care.”

The two doctors exchanged greetings and slipped into medical babble two seconds later.

“Dad?” Virgil gestured him over. “You remember Alex?” Why was there so much hesitation in his son’s voice?

“Certainly, the creator of Siliwrap.” The man was obviously asleep. “How is he?”

“Concussion, bruising, he and his mother need monitoring for possible lung infection. They were caught in contaminated water.” His son swallowed; his expression hesitant. “I wanted them here, Dad. Grandma has the skills and the tools.” He looked away. “I just couldn’t leave them to the system.” His eyes fell on Alex and Jeff’s heart clenched.

“We will look after them.” He dropped a consoling hand to his son’s shoulder.

Vulnerable eyes looked up at him. “Thanks, Dad.” His hand was squeezed and Virgil was again moving. This time running back to his ‘bird.

His mother immediately took over and bustled them all into the elevator before they could acquire new coiffures a’la rocket engine.

As the doors closed, Thunderbird Two accelerated out on to her runway and the elevator shaft roared as she took to the sky.

-o-o-o-

Alex rolled over in bed and sighed into his pillow. He was extremely comfortable. Temperature was perfect. Pillow was soft. “Mmmmm….”

“About time you woke up, Allie. You were starting to worry me.” His mother’s voice was always reassuring.

“He’s fine, Lolly. Concussion is healing and there is no sign of any lung infection. See, look at the scans.”

Alex frowned. That was a female voice he didn’t recognise. Also, why was his mum in his bedroom?

“You’re giving me equipment envy, Sally. My god, the science behind this is amazing.”

“Virgil has them in development, don’t you worry. A good percentage of our breakthroughs do get filtered down into the market. Unfortunately, there is a difference between the ability to make a device for International Rescue and making devices in efficient, ecological and economic mass production. Our teams do their best.” A snort. “And your boy is part of that team. His devotion to Siliwrap is all to his credit. Alex is saving lives as much, if not more, as any at Tracy industries. You should be proud.”

“Oh, that’s a given. He’s always been a little obsessive, especially regarding the Thunderbirds.”

Wha-?

Alex flung his eyes open to find his mother lying on a bed beside him, smiling. She had her ankle wrapped and raised and was obviously talking to the owner of the other voice, an older lady dressed in a purple jumpsuit.

Both were smiling at him.

“Where am I?”

Yes, that’s the first question out of any alien abductee’s mouth, no doubt about it.

“You’re on Tracy Island, Alex. You and your mother are safe and our guests.” When Alex didn’t respond as his brain automatically overloaded. “I’m Mrs Tracy, Virgil’s grandmother.”

“Watch it, Sally, he may combust on the spot.”

Thanks, mum.

His mother was grinning at him. “I swear he’s been looking for the location of this island since he discovered his first Thunderbird.”

“Mum!”

“Shhh! You’ll wake him up.” His mum was pointing behind him.

“Lolly, don’t worry, Virgil sleeps like the dead. Especially after a rescue like that.”

Virgil? What?

He twisted around and found a third bed behind him. Virgil lay sprawled face down on it, snoring softly into his pillow.

“Don’t worry, honey. He’s just tired. Our boys exhaust themselves and then wonder why their bodies shut down.”

It was only then all the events leading up to his current situation fully loaded into his brain.

Virgil.

Virgil had kissed him. His chocolate eyes held such relief and joy…

The scene played back in his head over and over, declaring that it had happened. That something Alex may have dreamed about but never really considered actually possible, had happened.

He stared at Virgil.

Gone was the uniform and in its place a simple black t-shirt outlining a lax bicep hanging off the edge of the bed. Alex’s eyes tracked down the length of Virgil’s arm to his hand.

Such strong hands.

The emergency responder had a blanket draped over him, obviously placed there after the advent of slumber, likely by his purple grandmother.

“Why is he here?”

Mrs Tracy walked around Alex’s bed so she could face him. “Now, don’t you start worrying your head off, young man. He is fine. He’s in the bed because otherwise he’d be asleep in a chair and that is not acceptable self-care. He wanted to stay here with you and it was the bed or out. Exhaustion did the rest.”

He stared at her a moment, his thoughts spinning.

“How are you feeling, Allie?”

Huh? He turned back to his mother. “Mum, your ankle…”

She waved him off. “Hon, I’ve done worse tripping over kids in the waiting room. Nothing to worry about.” She frowned at him. “How’s your head?”

How was his head? How was he in general?

There were aches, yes, now that attention had been drawn to them, but generally, considering that he’d just been through a major disaster, he felt okay. “I’m okay.”

His eyes drifted back to Virgil.

“Don’t you think of getting out of bed just so you can sit at his bedside, Alex. I know how you boys think, so don’t think you can pull one over on me.” Virgil’s grandmother was proving to be as bad as Alex’s mother.

“Don’t worry, Sally, he’s been very well trained from birth.”

“How did you manage that? I’ve been trying for nearly thirty years with the grandkids. Their father is just as bad.”

Alex’s eyes widened. Their father? Jeff Tracy. The Jeff Tracy who gave his name to Tracy Island. That Tracy Island that was ever so secret and Alex was currently resting his butt on. Well, the bed his was resting his butt on was on the Island. It was simple transference of molecular ownership.

Perhaps this was not the best moment to realise that he was wearing a black t-shirt very similar to Virgil’s and that it was not one he owned, nor was it one he was wearing the last time he was aware and conscious.

He pulled up the blanket and found black shorts. “Where are my clothes?” Perhaps the step up in octave was a little ridiculous on his part, but it had been a very stressful day.

“Your clothes were ruined, Allie. Jeff and Mrs Tracy were kind enough to supply and dress you in some replacements.” His mother was ever so matter-of-fact, as usual.

“Jeff Tracy saw me naked?!”

Okay, he had to admit, that was supposed to be inner voice and not shouted at the top of his lungs. In any case, it proved that it was possible to wake up Virgil Tracy, no matter what his grandmother said.

“Alex? What?”

He turned to find Virgil pushing himself up off the bed, hair sticking in all directions, obviously still half asleep.

“Honey, the man brought up five boys. One more is nothing new.” Mrs Tracy was as matter-of-fact as his mother.

Great. A team up.

“Virgil, go back to sleep.” Mrs Tracy bustled over to her grandson and attempted to get him to lie down.

But Virgil had caught sight of Alex. “Alex! You’re awake!”

Mrs Tracy actually rolled her eyes as Virgil threw off his covers and climbed out of bed. He closed the distance between them on bare feet. “Hey, how are you feeling?”

Alex couldn’t help it. “You look adorable.” Because he did. Big tough rescue operative with puffy eyes and hair sticking up all over the place, not to mention the black t-shirt and shorts that hid absolutely zero anatomical detail. And above all, he was smiling, as if ever so happy to see Alex…which was some kind of miracle and honestly how hard had he hit is head?

“You’re not bad yourself.” That smile turned to one of appreciation.

What?

His mother did mention a concussion…

“Okay, it’s obvious Virgil is not going to listen to his doctor’s advice, so Lolly and I will leave you two boys alone.” Mrs Tracy poked at his mum’s bed and it detached from the wall, hovering quite happily and easily nudged out of the room.

“Allie, take it easy, love. You are recovering from a concussion, after all.”

Yeah, yeah, mum, whatever. Virgil’s eyes were such a beautiful shade of brown.

Both women muttered to each other as they left the room, closing the door behind them.

Virgil was poking Alex’s bed controls with his fingers. “Good. You’ve rested.” His eyes were tracking over medical readouts. Alex’s medical readouts.

“I’m okay, Virgil.”

The man looked up at him again. “Good.”

Alex frowned as Virgil lifted a hand up and gently brushed Alex’s hair clear of his left temple and the abrasion there. “Grandma’s treated you well.”

Alex wanted to fall into that gentle touch. His eyes may have at least partially closed.

“Are we okay?”

Alex’s eyes snapped open.

“I mean…” Those eyes looked down and away. No, come back! “…we haven’t talked about-“

Alex was suddenly kissing Virgil. There had been space between them, but now it was gone, Alex had his arms around those truly magnificent biceps, and startled lips were pressed up against his, ever so warm, and god, Virgil was kissing him back…

There was a brain whiteout for a moment as Virgil’s arms returned Alex’s eager embrace…and then Virgil’s tongue was in his mouth and…

“Whoa! My bad.”

Alex pulled back.

“No! No, you two just keep doin’ what you were doin’ and I’ll just put this coffee down and-“

“Gordon, what do you want?” Virgil hadn’t let go of Alex, but his head did turn towards his brother.

Alex was busy dying on the spot. Why did he do that? Kiss Virgil? Him?

“I brought you coffee! You know, life blood and all that.” Coffee? “Uh, you might want to get back to that tonsil hockey you were playing. Alex looks like he’s might dump you for the coffee.”

“Go away, Gordon.”

“Going away, leaving, like a tree. Happy for both of you. ‘Bout time, Virg.”

“Gordon!”

“I’m gone!” And he was, the door sliding shut behind him.

Virgil turned back to Alex. “Sorry about that.” A slight shrug. “I have brothers.”

Alex blinked. “I have sisters.”

Virgil’s smile was a sight to behold. “So, we’re okay?”

Alex had had a very hard day, his head was a bit of a mess and there were several truths he was ignoring to keep his sanity. But right now?

He tugged Virgil closer. ��More than okay.”

“You want some coffee?”

But Virgil’s lips were brushing his and… “No, I’m good.”

The coffee went cold.

-o-o-o-

FIN

[my-autism-adhd-blog]

I started coming to terms with being autistic last year. As a female person in a very community-involved family I was throughly trained on social skills. I thrive in social situations. In realizing my autism I start experiencing how much it costs me. I'm... not really there. I just play through the skripts I learned, without feeling a thing. I even trained to become a psychologist. I'm really good in reacting exactly the right way. But I feel stuck in people-pleasing all day long. But now, with coming more into contact with my real self, I feel like I'm losing all these skills. When I feel myself, when I allow myself to be me, none of it makes sense anymore. It feels like I can either hvae no sense of self and know exactly how to act/speak appropriatly. Or I can be myself but nothing people do makes sense at all. It feels like becoming myself makes me loose all my skills. I'm afraid to fall out of society if I allow myself to be me. I'm afraid about this confusion I find in myself- I knew exactly how to act. It's only know that I realize how shallow it is. How none of it makes sense to me and I do it anyway. Can anyone relate? Do you have tipps for me how to procede? I feel so lonely...

Hi there,

It sounds like you’ve been masking and lost your sense of identity. There are some sources that go over this:

Hopefully these can help. Maybe my followers can provide some insight too.

Thank you for the inbox. I hope you have a wonderful day/night. ♥️

[aspd-culture]

Contributing to the conversation, I think it’s, I’m gonna be honest, more likely that emotional abuse would boost the chances of aspd forming because children as a demographic are routinely gaslit, emotionally abused, dehumanized, and treated as property both by their caregivers (be they family, guardians, or teachers) or peers (other kids in school). Being dehumanized routinely as a child and thinking this is all you are to others, it would make sense that being on the receiving end of ‘antisocial treatment’ (as in, things that would prohibit social camaraderie and communal relations) would contribute to an antisocial mindset that persists in life.

Aspd is very specifically also a heavy impulse-based disorder too, underdeveloped frontal lobe and prolonged emotional trauma before the healthy development of that lobe that manages impulse control in social settings met with emotional abuse, it’s probably also why a lot of kids who do develop aspd could also end up with an exception for the person who treated them like a person but one person obviously cannot offset All of the damage the rest of their environment caused. I think aspd is perhaps somewhat more underdiagnosed *because* people don’t provide a lot of support to pwaspd when they’re adults because the adult with aspd has so thoroughly alienated themselves through their disorder that people just don’t care if they get help or communal care. Because it’s easier to just let pwaspd fall through the cracks because they’re “evil” and “don’t deserve it”.

So now you have someone who has spent their entire lives being proven left and right that they’re not cared about so “why the fuck should they care about anyone else, care is obviously conditional on my behavior and even when I mask, I’m not good enough”. Anyways, yeah, I absolutely think prolonged emotional abuse is absolutely a valid and understandable cause of aspd when we look at how we treat kids.

On the one hand, there is a lot here I completely agree with, but I do have some points I feel there is more to/have some nuance/etc.

So yeah, absolutely agree that emotional abuse seems a much more likely culprit for the development of ASPD than others (assuming of course that we're putting these in a vacuum, because realistically most children suffering other types of abuse likely experience emotional abuse as well. Not arguing with that at all. The reasons you mention here all make a lot of sense to me, and I want to add that one known to be a big one is teasing; many researchers believe that specific experience is very damaging to a child at risk of developing ASPD. Part of that is what you mentioned - the gaslighting and general disregard for the trauma teasing can cause and the hurt associated with it makes the child feel like they will not be protected in other situations. Because the child doesn't see this the way the adults do - as something "trivial", unimportant, and incomparable to "real" trauma - they don't realize that the adults involved would respond differently to other types of pain. They just believe, given their experience, that the adults will always minimize and disregard the problems they come to them with and therefore do not bother to ask for the help they know they won't get in the future. This creates the need to be self-sufficient and protect yourself and, without intervention from adults, the ways to do that are limited and generally either violent or manipulative. Children dealing with any type of disregard for their problems may also learn that they can manipulate the adults into reacting the way they need them to - a seemingly helpless, caring, "gentle", naïve, etc. child will get more help than the average one - and take that as a normal part of life.

I'd argue that dehumanization is less related to ASPD personally, not in that it can't be but in that it isn't a specific risk factor. Generally, that dehumanization of children is universal not pointed, and the child will see that children are treated like this, but adults are not, and that will stick in their development as it does to all children. The things that are generally considered large risk factors for ASPD's development are things that lead the child to believe will be a problem their entire life, and therefore their brain develops to tolerate that. An example here is that all children deal with restrictions and rules older children and adults do not have, and cannot do things older children and adults can do. They see this and rather than learn it as an issue with society, they simply become impatient to grow up. Dehumanization is a serious trauma that arguably most kids deal with, and it needs to be addressed and fixed for the good of children as a whole, but I don't think it specifically lends itself to ASPD if that is the only kind of emotional abuse the child is dealing with (again, putting these things in unrealistic vacuums for the purpose of this conversation). Now there is a MAJOR exception to this:

Dehumanization that goes to demonization absolutely is a heavy risk factor for ASPD. If you treat a child like they are all bad, or even actually call them a demon/devil/terror/etc. frequently and consistently enough, especially if they hear you doing it behind their back to other people, then they will take that in as a part of their identity. Children don't understand the fluidity of identity, which is why their current interest will always become their favorite thing, their answer to "what do you want to be when you grow up" will be intense and certain yet change every few days/weeks, etc. so when you identify them as a bad kid or worse, then they will behave that way because they think that is what they are supposed to be. This attempt at correcting a child's behavior generally leads against its own goal and makes the child believe you *want* them to be bad because that is what you told them they are. But the general dehumanization of children is honestly an overall societal problem and considering how low the prevalence of ASPD is (even accounting for under-diagnosis), I think it's probably not a leading factor. That's just personal opinion though, a good portion of my response to this ask is.

It's really important to me that we address the belief that impulse control issues are inherent to and a major part of ASPD, because that genuinely is not the case. While it is a part of the diagnostic criteria, I'd like to point out that only 3/7 of those need to apply, and impulse control doesn't need to be one of them. Allow me to explain why this is important to me before anyone writes off this please, because this one actually is not opinion based. ASPD is well known to be a disorder heavily based on trauma in the overwhelming majority of cases - purely genetic ASPD without any trauma exists but is not common at all afaik. Discussing the majority who are traumatized, it's important to note that a lot of types of trauma *do not allow for impulse control issues*, at the expense of the child's safety and emotional/physical wellbeing. It is dangerous for a child dealing with trauma bad enough to cause a personality disorder to not be able to control themselves, and part of what ASPD is is a means of self-preservation in the face of a seemingly hostile, dangerous, and uncaring world/society. Thus the symptoms we see in ASPD - aggression, defensiveness, self-sufficiency, distrust of others, manipulation, lying, charisma, etc etc etc - are things that would have kept the child safer and get them ahead. For the children who were at risk if they were not able to control impulses, that symptom has quite a low chance of developing. Therefore, I don't think it's fair to say that that is an inherent part of ASPD. Our understanding of the neurology of ASPD is also very undeveloped - all research of ASPD up to and including current has been and continues to be biased and ableist, specifically mostly including inmates imprisoned for long sentences due to violent crimes, especially extreme ones and repeat offenders. This is naturally going to lead to the idea that ASPD is always or almost always associated with poor impulse control - because your average person with ASPD is not going to be included in these studies to get an accurate representation. Until we do get a largely unbiased understanding of ASPD, I don't think we can decisively say anything about the neurology of it, and I've seen several researchers and mental health professions alike agree with the idea that we don't know anything conclusive about that at this point for various reasons, including admittedly the lack of cooperative response many pwASPD would give a study like that.

I also have some notes on the issue of underdiagnosis, because I think it's based in a similar concept to what you said, but for the opposite reason. The people most likely to be diagnosed with ASPD are ostracized and isolated, as far as I've seen. The problem with underdiagnosis really comes in with the opposite type of ASPD which may well be the majority. That is the people who have crafted a seemingly normal adjustment to life and society - people who have friends (whether they're actual friends or just a front to seem normal), have healthy or at least long-term relationships of some variety, seem caring and kind, and are generally either well-liked or at least have no more effect on the people around them than neutral. It's not the ones who have been mistreated and openly get dismissed as bad and evil even into adulthood who don't get diagnosed, it's those of us who *don't* fit that stereotype. It's something a lot of us fight tooth and nail to get people to understand; I'm aware I seem empathetic and caring but that is both possible for pwASPD to learn to be and possible to fake. It is that dismissal and demonization of pwASPD that leads to diagnosis - but not from the people being demonized or dismissed by society.

All in all I don't entirely disagree with any point you make here and I think all of it is an important piece of the discussion of the risk factors of ASPD, but I think this understanding is missing a good amount too.

Plain text below the cut:

On the one hand, there is a lot here I completely agree with, but I do have some points I feel there is more to/have some nuance/etc.

So yeah, absolutely agree that emotional abuse seems a much more likely culprit for the development of ASPD than others (assuming of course that we're putting these in a vacuum, because realistically most children suffering other types of abuse likely experience emotional abuse as well. Not arguing with that at all. The reasons you mention here all make a lot of sense to me, and I want to add that one known to be a big one is teasing; many researchers believe that specific experience is very damaging to a child at risk of developing ASPD. Part of that is what you mentioned - the gaslighting and general disregard for the trauma teasing can cause and the hurt associated with it makes the child feel like they will not be protected in other situations. Because the child doesn't see this the way the adults do - as something "trivial", unimportant, and incomparable to "real" trauma - they don't realize that the adults involved would respond differently to other types of pain. They just believe, given their experience, that the adults will always minimize and disregard the problems they come to them with and therefore do not bother to ask for the help they know they won't get in the future. This creates the need to be self-sufficient and protect yourself and, without intervention from adults, the ways to do that are limited and generally either violent or manipulative. Children dealing with any type of disregard for their problems may also learn that they can manipulate the adults into reacting the way they need them to - a seemingly helpless, caring, "gentle", naïve, etc. child will get more help than the average one - and take that as a normal part of life.

I'd argue that dehumanization is less related to ASPD personally, not in that it can't be but in that it isn't a specific risk factor. Generally, that dehumanization of children is universal not pointed, and the child will see that children are treated like this, but adults are not, and that will stick in their development as it does to all children. The things that are generally considered large risk factors for ASPD's development are things that lead the child to believe will be a problem their entire life, and therefore their brain develops to tolerate that. An example here is that all children deal with restrictions and rules older children and adults do not have, and cannot do things older children and adults can do. They see this and rather than learn it as an issue with society, they simply become impatient to grow up. Dehumanization is a serious trauma that arguably most kids deal with, and it needs to be addressed and fixed for the good of children as a whole, but I don't think it specifically lends itself to ASPD if that is the only kind of emotional abuse the child is dealing with (again, putting these things in unrealistic vacuums for the purpose of this conversation). Now there is a MAJOR exception to this:

Dehumanization that goes to demonization absolutely is a heavy risk factor for ASPD. If you treat a child like they are all bad, or even actually call them a demon/devil/terror/etc. frequently and consistently enough, especially if they hear you doing it behind their back to other people, then they will take that in as a part of their identity. Children don't understand the fluidity of identity, which is why their current interest will always become their favorite thing, their answer to "what do you want to be when you grow up" will be intense and certain yet change every few days/weeks, etc. so when you identify them as a bad kid or worse, then they will behave that way because they think that is what they are supposed to be. This attempt at correcting a child's behavior generally leads against its own goal and makes the child believe you *want* them to be bad because that is what you told them they are. But the general dehumanization of children is honestly an overall societal problem and considering how low the prevalence of ASPD is (even accounting for under-diagnosis), I think it's probably not a leading factor. That's just personal opinion though, a good portion of my response to this ask is.

It's really important to me that we address the belief that impulse control issues are inherent to and a major part of ASPD, because that genuinely is not the case. While it is a part of the diagnostic criteria, I'd like to point out that only 3/7 of those need to apply, and impulse control doesn't need to be one of them. Allow me to explain why this is important to me before anyone writes off this please, because this one actually is not opinion based. ASPD is well known to be a disorder heavily based on trauma in the overwhelming majority of cases - purely genetic ASPD without any trauma exists but is not common at all afaik. Discussing the majority who are traumatized, it's important to note that a lot of types of trauma *do not allow for impulse control issues*, at the expense of the child's safety and emotional/physical wellbeing. It is dangerous for a child dealing with trauma bad enough to cause a personality disorder to not be able to control themselves, and part of what ASPD is is a means of self-preservation in the face of a seemingly hostile, dangerous, and uncaring world/society. Thus the symptoms we see in ASPD - aggression, defensiveness, self-sufficiency, distrust of others, manipulation, lying, charisma, etc etc etc - are things that would have kept the child safer and get them ahead. For the children who were at risk if they were not able to control impulses, that symptom has quite a low chance of developing. Therefore, I don't think it's fair to say that that is an inherent part of ASPD. Our understanding of the neurology of ASPD is also very undeveloped - all research of ASPD up to and including current has been and continues to be biased and ableist, specifically mostly including inmates imprisoned for long sentences due to violent crimes, especially extreme ones and repeat offenders. This is naturally going to lead to the idea that ASPD is always or almost always associated with poor impulse control - because your average person with ASPD is not going to be included in these studies to get an accurate representation. Until we do get a largely unbiased understanding of ASPD, I don't think we can decisively say anything about the neurology of it, and I've seen several researchers and mental health professions alike agree with the idea that we don't know anything conclusive about that at this point for various reasons, including admittedly the lack of cooperative response many pwASPD would give a study like that.

I also have some notes on the issue of underdiagnosis, because I think it's based in a similar concept to what you said, but for the opposite reason. The people most likely to be diagnosed with ASPD are ostracized and isolated, as far as I've seen. The problem with underdiagnosis really comes in with the opposite type of ASPD which may well be the majority. That is the people who have crafted a seemingly normal adjustment to life and society - people who have friends (whether they're actual friends or just a front to seem normal), have healthy or at least long-term relationships of some variety, seem caring and kind, and are generally either well-liked or at least have no more effect on the people around them than neutral. It's not the ones who have been mistreated and openly get dismissed as bad and evil even into adulthood who don't get diagnosed, it's those of us who *don't* fit that stereotype. It's something a lot of us fight tooth and nail to get people to understand; I'm aware I seem empathetic and caring but that is both possible for pwASPD to learn to be and possible to fake. It is that dismissal and demonization of pwASPD that leads to diagnosis - but not from the people being demonized or dismissed by society.

All in all I don't entirely disagree with any point you make here and I think all of it is an important piece of the discussion of the risk factors of ASPD, but I think this understanding is missing a good amount too.

[breelandwalker]

So you have recommendations for where to research signs of baneful magic having been performed on you or your home? Or do you have a list of signs to look out for just in case?

This is an excellent question (sorry it took me so long to get to it, this month has been BONKS) and it provides a good opportunity to talk about ambiguity and alarm systems.

Most sources that talk about how to detect signs of baneful magic will usually talk about random illnesses, accidents, bad luck, general misfortune, that sort of thing. And while it's true that these CAN be signs of baneful magic being directed your way, it's hardly a foolproof system, as these are also things that can and do happen without any magical interference. Plus, it creates kind of a self-fulfilling prophecy. If you view any misfortune as a sign of being "cursed," then you tend to start looking for more signs and take note of every little thing that goes wrong, including things that you might normally brush off.

The only real way to know for sure that you've been cursed is to literally watch someone perform a baneful spell directed at you. Everything else is the magical equivalent of hearsay and guesswork. (Yes, even if someone TELLS you they've cursed you, since there's also a neat little trick that involves telling someone to expect the worst and then letting them suffer with the anxiety and pessimism, believing that doom is on the way, while you do next to nothing apart from encouraging the assumption. Bit of Headology for you there.) And even THEN, it's not a sure thing, since spells don't work 100% of the time.

In my experience, the best plan is to be proactive and to look to mundane examples for inspiration on how to structure magical solutions. If you want to know whether someone or something has intruded on your space, what do you do? You set up physical indicators and install some kind of security, right? If you want to know whether deer are getting into your garden, you put up a fence high enough to be a deterrent, you check the beds for prints and nibbled produce, and if you want to go the extra mile, you set up a trail cam. So do the same with your magical protections and your list of personal omens.

Add a layer to your home/personal protections that reflects, diverts, or nullifies spells sent your way that are unwanted, disruptive, or harmful. This might take the form of a defensive mirror jar or a ward that burns away or entangles those undesirable spells. It can be something you add to existing magical protections or a separate spell dedicated to the purpose, whatever works best for your needs.

In addition to this, add an entry to your list of personal omens that is specifically for Disruptive Incoming Magic. Make the sign something you're not likely to see on the regular so that you can immediately recognize it when and if it turns up. In all likelihood, you'll never need it because the possibility of actually being cursed is SO much lower than social media would have you think, but it's nice to have the failsafe.

(I fully recommend creating a list of personal omens to any witch who wants to look for signs btw. Make a list with easy-to-spot examples and clear meanings that takes natural occurrences into account. It's a great way to simplify things and not drive yourself to distraction wondering whether that spider on your floor is a Sign of Something or...just a random spider.)

So now you've got your prevention in place and you have an indicator to let you know if something does show up. It's still not foolproof, but it certainly helps.

In the meantime, just remember that witches experience accidents and illness and runs of bad luck with the same relative frequency as anyone else. The fact that something bad / a series of bad things has happened is not necessarily an indicator of the presence of baneful magic. Sometimes Shit Just Happens.

But when in doubt, you can always do a quick cleansing of your space and reinforce your protections to clear away anything unwanted that might be in the space. If nothing else, it's due diligence and it will probably make you feel better.

Hope this helps!

[meatballlady]

The Hidden Prophecy Hypothesis

Here I am throwing an idea into the mix for s2 theorizing. Maybe it has been mentioned before, lmk if there are related metas out there already!

(disclaimer to not tag Neil!!! I don't want this to be shot down if it's a real possibility)

Here's my proposition:

At its core, the idea is that there is an information disparity between A/C and the audience, based on some source of knowledge that was not directly mentioned in S2 (i.e. hidden from the audience).

Between the events of S1 and S2, A/C came into contact with some sort of information about the future/H&H's strategy(ies)/etc. I'm calling this the hidden prophecy, but it could really be anything at all! A copy of Hell's plans from Shax, human prophecies, thorough reading of past assignments, etc.*

Immediate interpretation of the prophecy: In order for the apocalypse to happen, Aziraphale and Crowley need to kickstart it together.

Another main point of the prophecy: The trigger for the prophecy's events will be that someone (some angel?) will show up alone unexpectedly and ask them for help.

Also included are some vague details/triggers for the prophecy (which end up happening in S2 but aren't clear until after they happen)

Obviously A/C are not fans of this idea. They have an ongoing disagreement about the interpretation above, in fact.

Aziraphale believes there is a deeper interpretation of the prophecy if they research it enough. i.e. that they can work together without accidentally starting the apocalypse

Crowley believes they shouldn't fuck with it - that they should avoid each other entirely once the triggers start happening, to completely avoid any risk of accidentally kickstarting the apocalypse by working/being together.

* my partner believes this has to do with the second Agnes Nutter book. There are still many many ways to get a prophecy to someone even if the pages were burnt.

Cue season 2.

Open questions this could provide answers for:

Do the characters have more information than the audience and if so, why does it still look like they're flailing? They don't know "what's actually going on", they just have different expectations/starting points than the audience.

Why Crowley reacted very poorly to Gabriel showing up, and why he was so angry about leaving "so. this is how you want to do it." He thinks Aziraphale has ruined it already by asking for his help; also he doesn't want to stop talking to Aziraphale yet (he never will ofc)

Why Aziraphale got so pissy when Crowley said he wouldn't help with Gabriel "but if you won't, you won't." He thinks they can work together on the Gabriel thing, so obviously they don't need to avoid each other yet!

The weirdness about the apology dance: There was additional context to it, even though it was, ultimately, about the Jimbriel thing. Crowley was apologizing for being wrong about needing to not work together, not for not wanting to take care of Gabriel

Why they continue to look for clues outside of the Jimbriel question. They are looking for other prophecy triggers/apocalypse triggers.

Why Aziraphale acts with urgency around the ball. He is suspicious that Crowley was right and this is his last chance to host something for him.

Why the Metatron wanted Aziraphale (and possibly Crowley) back in Heaven

The final fifteen. They finally realize that Gabriel wasn't the trigger; the Metatron was. Aziraphale is still desperately insistent on working together, despite "realizing" Crowley may be right that they shouldn't. Crowley wants to work together but thinks they can't. They're both conflicted - about being right or not, about what the prophecy actually meant, and about how they will move forward. Maybe they both now agree that they shouldn't work together (which in s3 we will find out is actually incorrect), but they also both don't want to stop.

Loose ends from s1, such as the second prophecy book, the lack of mention of A/C addressing "the really big one" (i.e. because they already have and just don't bring it up)

Why "they aren't talking" now, per Neil - they think that it would move the apocalypse along to do so.

Why I like this idea (so far):

It doesn't retcon the final fifteen (only provides additional context)

(the additional angst potential for the final fifteen)

It is easy to explain to an audience

It is an "elegant" solution, i.e. doesn't ask more questions than it answers

Understanding of S2 would not be required to understand S3 - it just provides additional flavor to s2.

Open questions this doesn't seem to provide (direct/immediate, at least) answers for:

Maggie

The flashbacks

The 25 Lazarii miracle

The Halo

What Crowley was doing in Heaven

The discontinuities

[is-the-owl-video-cute]

"We don’t even know how the human brain works in full and you’re over here trying to diagnose (or un-diagnose?) random teens on tumblr because you think them applying to themselves a label that makes sense to them is harming any of you?" The "endogenic" label is harming the OSDDID community. Actively so, actually, by examples you provided. You mentioned yourself that some people may self-identify as endogenic because their trauma has been deeply hidden and buried within their mind. If you are diagnosed with DID or OSDD, that is a childhood trauma disorder. It confirms that there is trauma that happened in your childhood- and the best, healthiest option for you would be to find where it is being held, and help that part of you process the trauma, usually through therapy. It may be long, and grueling, but it is ten thousand times healthier than denying you have any trauma and never working through it.

Now, let's say you are diagnosed with DID or OSDD, and instead of following the recommendations, you instead say "Nope! I'm endogenic which means I have no trauma! My entire system is actually just here because God willed it! (real explanation some people give)" Despite the fact that this person has a CHILDHOOD TRAUMA DISORDER, and there is ZERO significant medical research even suggesting you can have DID without childhood trauma, you go on to deny you have any trauma and keep it deeply buried. You have switching triggers that don't understand. You blackout for days. You are dealing with constant mental anguish and symptoms of unresolved trauma, all because you have used something based on no medical science to deny that your childhood trauma disorder is caused by childhood trauma.

So yes, creating an outlet for people with a very serious and debilatating childhood trauma disorder to deny their trauma is, very much, harming us.

Okay so here’s the thing, anon. You are not these peoples psychiatrists. You are not their therapists. You do not know them. You are making blanket assumptions about their mental health based on tumblr posts. Do you realize how asinine that is?

Do you not realize how insane it is for you to say “these people are suppressing trauma in an unhealthy way because I read their tumblr bio and they used word I don’t like so I know them better than they do!”? You realize that’s insane, right?

And again, I cannot emphasize this one enough, if you have multiple guys in your brain meat, you’re a system. You can go full armchair psychiatrist and try to gatekeep plurality for… whatever unhinged reason you use to justify that, but ultimately if a person is actually people I kinda think they’re gonna know that about themselves better than you do. Attacking random mentally ill strangers online and trying to force them to unearth a childhood trauma isn’t exactly making you the hero of the story.

[timemachineyeah]

Please disregard if there's no way to answer this without it being invasive but... re: your recent post about your job supporting your fatigue and disabilities... would you mind saying what industry it is? I have a friend with disability/chronic debilitating illness who is trying to figure out how to envision a working life while managing ongoing pain, surgeries, fatigue, etc., and I think he despairs of any place ever being willing to accommodate him for a few hours a week. We google things plenty, but the difference between a helpful listicle and a real person's anecdote is everything.

sure. my job is kind of niche so I don’t know how easy it would be to go hunting for it specifically, and I do kinda worry about giving its title since afaict only one company uses it (though more than one does this same basic thing) and my job is very regional, but maybe describing it would help you somehow

basically I work for an archive / news service. technically, I’m a journalist, but realistically what I do is more akin to gophering and data entry. I work three days a week - two short days in my county and one long one in one of the neighboring counties. on days when I leave the county I get hours for my driving time and miles reimbursed.

I don’t get a lot of flexibility on how many days I work, but when I started the job I got to pick which three days I would work, so got to decide whether one long rest or two short rests would suit me better. On the days I work I have a deadline (5pm) but can work whenever I want to meet that deadline. Sometimes it’s 9am - 11am and other times it’s 1pm - 3pm. Sometimes there’s no new cases and work is 20 minutes from my couch.

And basically what I do is compile a list of potentially interesting lawsuits filed in the county, go to the relevant courthouse to read the actual legal complaint, summarize and log the ones that meet certain criteria in a simple sentence, and get scans of ones that meet even stricter criteria to upload to our archive, all of which gets sent out to our subscribers on mailing lists.

Then, journalists and lawyers pay to get these updates or access these databases for their own reporting or research. I often know local headlines a few days to a couple weeks early because I was the one reading the source material.

I work an average of 7 hours a week. My short days are usually an hour or two. My long day is 3-7 hours depending on which county I’m going to and how unique or complicated the filed cases are. It does not take long to do the actual work. Most of my hours come from driving rural highways and listening to podcasts.

It’s the kind of job there’s not a lot of. But while it’s the best I’ve found, I’ve found very part time work with lenient employers before. It is possible. You just gotta be specific about it.

I will say, while most jobs are not looking for employees that part time, those that are will thrilled to hear that’s enough hours for you. Employers who need one specific skilled task that only takes 7 hours a week often struggle with retention because, well, how many people are gonna take that as a stop gap until they get more full time work? And then all the rest are likely to be disabled people like me, who have retention issues for reasons of health. That being said I’ve worked this job for years now, and I’m not letting it go without, like, some other better guarantee. Because while I’m happy to provide hope that these jobs do exist, it is also true that they’re tough to find.

[netherworldpost]

The results are in and as I said, overwhelming.

I have been looking at polling systems and forms and what-nots — there isn’t a significant difference for the sake of this project, as a form can be fed into a math widget and made into a poll.

As a public domain research and development post:

(ie if you want to do this with your world or company etc, do so, and tell me about it, I love data)

The system I will be using is…

Google Forms.

The other systems I found largely cost $15-30/month and almost all want users to register, or in some way provide an email address.

I explicitly want to keep this no-barrier and open to responders answering as many times as they like. Honestly, “this poll was frequently spammed” will be a hilarious footnote.

This isn’t a serious system.

It’s for entertainment — both in the real world (me behind a computer crafting it) and in fiction (the storylines I am writing for the Netherworld poll takers are, hopefully, going to be very funny). As in, my characters themselves are going to create mischief for the poll takers.

For the email portion: I always want to email you via my mailing list once or twice a month about our shenanigans.

I cannot abide this as a barrier of entry. If you say “I like your shenanigans but no” I still want you to be able to enjoy the shenanigans.

Furthering the public research and domain essay portion of this post — if you run a project, you have to meet people where they want to hear about it.

I like emails.

I don’t like messaging apps.

I am wary of social media for every reason you can imagine plus a week-long course I can host of more reasons.

Broad communication styles will help keep us (and your projects) moving forward.

I am explicitly wary of Google’s, hmm, softening, stance on using AI without solid guardrails and will be writing questions accordingly, and will include notes not to give over details about a character or realm (etc) you are protective about in this context.

I love data.

I love polls.

I love ridiculous charts and graphs.

Thank you nearly 300 similarly minded poll takers!

More soon.

[eri-lessthan3]

Right, as my rimworld ice playthrough is nearing it's end (?), I suppose I should introduce the colony!

Behold, the Lanwell! Our humble abode, where we have survived checks the days 463 days, wow!

Let me show you around!

The brightest room we have is the Schneider's throne room, since she is soon to become a countess! And yes, we are so rich that we can afford to keep the braziers constantly lit (this wasn't always the case ;p). This room also functions as a place for people to hang out and listen to music or look at the art collection that is way too big for this small room ;P

Right next to it are the main rooms, from which it all started. The kitchen, which used to be our only room at some point, with a nutrient paste dispenser, fueled entirely by uhhhhh... friendly donors! ^^

We also still have our wind turbines as a secondary power source, though we are mostly reliant on chemfuel generators now! Some of which we stole from ancient vaults, and these guys are very efficient :3

We also have our little storage room right next to it. It is mainly a freezer, buuuut it also stores a bunch of random junk, since this is usually how I end up playing rimworld anyway >.<

Next to the kitchen is the heart of our colony, the hydroponics! This is the only reason why we can live and prosper, as it provides us with food, clothes, medicine, beer, wood, money, and even chemfuel from rice, if we run out of it! Thought this room has seen some destruction before, we obviously need it to always function :3

Our colony grew right from that luscious heart. We have our workshop area, our personal bedrooms (don't mind Dorgo, he is just jealous and he really wants some jade sculptures in his room -.-). Although unfortunately, those two rooms on the left are empty. Rest in Peace, Vulcavein. We also have our research room and a hospital, which is often the target of enemy drops, for some reason >.<

To the right of those rooms, we have completely incorporated this space between our base and the mountains. We have a rec room, which used to be a school, we have our temple to Ithalux, with his sigil painted on the floor. As we are also transhumanist, we have neural superchargers and biosculpter pods, and speaking of that

Say hello to Cambiar! He is currently undergoing age reversal procedures, so he probably can't hear you, actually. Anyways

We have a rather empty, yet surprisingly comfortable prisoners barracks, even though if we ever do get prisoners, they usually don't stay here for long...

And yeah, we also have our small gene-tailoring room from that one time I bothered to go out onto the map for a secret vault, and also bothered to bring this stuff back, but we never used it, and we can't regularly loot vaults either, as it can get to -60 degrees with no problem. Our feeble human bodies must stay inside of the base for most of the time. Speaking of that:

This is the reason we have our mech friends! They help us run our base, defend it, and are our only real way to go outside during the winter without freezing to death. Although we don't really do that anymore, as there is no reason to leave our perfect colony.

Speaking of that, meet Manuel, our first and only android! He is also part of our defences, but he is quite helpful around the base, and he can venture into cold without risking his life that much. In fact, we had to send him on a mission to destroy a mech cluster at some point, and together with our mechs (which uhhh, were hard to control that remotely) he dealt with that easily, definitely nothing went wrong. And he doesn't have to eat, which means that he can caravan forever, I think.

I suppose I could also present these few bedrooms, with Schneider's royal one standing out the most. She has to have one, as we are planning to leave this hostile world and join our new friends in the Broken Imperium. Now that I say it, that name doesn't bring much hope, but it should be fiiiine.

For that, however, we will need to protect a royal for quite some time, and thus we have prepared quite the room for them! You can also see our devilstrand growing zone, as we try to extract the most out of this rocky soil. And uhh, don't look at the top, there is nothing to worry about there ^^'

For you see, we have our small factory over here! Thanks to the VFE - Mechanoids, we can produce steel and plasteel out of basically nothing! This used to produce components instead, hence why the weird layout, but our fabricors can do that on their own. We also have a medicine production facility, though it is currently off. And we have our magic neutroamine generator! Don't question how it works, don't look into that room! Better focus on our neat android workshop, which really didn't need so much random junk there, but I am just figuring stuff out ;P. And yeah, this is why we need the neutroamine!

Yeah, there is nothing more to see of this colony! Just a bunch of monuments and steam power plants, and that is all ;P There is no need to open those doors, they just lead to empty monuments we had to construct for quests and such :3

And that was the tour ^^

Now, the reason I did this is that we will try to leave this planet once the "summer" starts here, and I will try to not save scum too much. I really enjoyed this colony, but I feel like it is time to move on. I have so many other rimworld ideas either way. So yeah, hopefully see you in the stars!

[corvus-ace]

gotta catch em all: persona 5 edition!

full disclosure, this au started as a joke.

so for the last two-three-ish weeks i've been playing with the idea of a pokemon au for the p5 cast, it's been living in my head rent free, and it's been developing with a speed i definitely was not expecting but am not about to question, and there is definitely an impending fic in the making. so i decided i'd try something new where i actually introduce an au on here before i start posting the fic itself to my ao3 and yes this is partially because my co-developer-slash-beta-reader-slash-best-friend has art pending for this. just gonna do brief introductions (as brief as i can manage anyways; proper character introductions are coming soon!) so without further ado, here we go :D

setup: this is obviously set in the world of pokemon; however it is not set in any particular region. this is partly because i wanted to keep my options open when selecting pokemon for the main cast. in addition, the main cast have been aged up to college age, with the pts in the 20-23 range (as of right now akira will be 22 and the rest will be adjusted around that). pokemon journeys begin around 17 or 18 and there's not as much pressure to start a journey as soon as you're old enough, which is why akira is only just starting his. non-thief confidants will be making appearances, though most will be only minor. also, morgana is not a pokemon - he is still a cat, and he can still talk. this will be explained much much later. for now here's the main cast:

akira: the one on a journey! he lives with sojiro, who runs a pokemon cafe in a small town, and futaba, his little sister in all but blood. he likes to run a mixed-type team and calls home often

ryuji: trainer who specializes in electric types! he was supposed to start his journey right at eighteen but wasn't able to due to his leg injury. he grew up with his yamper, which evolved into a boltund a few months into ryuji's recovery; the boltund is his best friend

ann: fierce fire type trainer who loves to travel! she's in a long distance relationship with shiho, who lives in a neighboring city. her starter pokemon was fennekin, which sparked her love for fire types; she's very protective of all her pokemon

yusuke: ice type trainer whose real passion isn't pokemon battles but pokemon art! he has a goal to paint every pokemon, and he's slowly working his way through every one he can find, starting with his beloved frosmoth. but he can't explore the world just yet....

makoto: the youngest steel type gym leader in her city's history! at only twenty, she was able to beat out several older candidates for the position of gym leader through her sheer skill and her coordination with her pokemon. her skarmory is a force to be feared

futaba: a young intern whose mother was a pokemon researcher! she mainly works remotely from her dad's cafe, but she's dead set on someday being able to visit her mother's lab. she's great with pokemon, with her umbreon providing comfort from darkness

haru: unwilling but skilled psychic type gym leader! her father used to run the gym and insisted she take his place when he retired, and she's plenty suited to the task. but she has other interests and plans for her future that only gothitelle and her other pokemon know....

goro: dark type gym leader who is rarely at the gym! he wants to run the gym, but an organization beyond his control is set on wresting control of the gym from him. they can't get control without defeating him, though, so he and his corviknight are on quite the trip

sumire: the trainer with an uncertain path! her sister once ran a grass-type gym in their city, but she's been in a coma for months. she's not sure how to move forward. fortunately for her, mimikyu found her at her lowest and could help her choose a future....

i'm really looking forward to posting this au, both in the form of actual fic on ao3 and fleshing out the details here on tumblr! i've got big plans for the story, which is shocking for someone who struggles with plot so often, so i think this'll be a fun experience. can't wait to share more :3

[isthedogawolfdog]

The Ultimate Masterpost/Masterlist of Wolf Books And Resources

Introduction

Hello hello, and welcome to the ultimate post on wolf resources, brought by me, a person with too much free time who recently had coffee for the first time in years and I can feel it. Before I start I want the reader to know that this will be a very long post, so be prepared! Maybe grab some water or something as you may be here for a while. (ending note, it took me five hours plus a few minutes to make this, it’s long).

So a while ago I made this post upon being asked for book recommendations on wolves, and I happily provided a brief but not entire list. I wanted to create a more extensive list, but have yet to have an opportunity to do so. Now that time has passed, I’m finally going to be making it. I remember how hard it was to find solid resources when I first started personal research on wild canids, so hopefully this post can help other wide eyed individuals who are hungry for the good Knowledge.

I few disclaimers before I start: 1. this list is not at all an exhaustive list of all resources, as there are likely many more I am leaving out. 2. Along with that, I am not an expert, I am simply someone who is neurodivergent and needs something to tether me to the real world or else I will lose it who has some free time and a deep love for animals, especially canines. I am pursuing a degree in wildlife conservation and rehabilitation, but even that is the extent of my knowledge. 3. This list will mainly focus on books, but if I have time I will add some other resources to (ending note: I had time :) ).

Without further ado (adieu?), it is 11:20 in the morning while starting this, lets get on with the books!

Quick Side Notes

Real quick, the following are names you will want to keep an eye out when researching wolves:

- Rick McIntyre (wolf interpreter; has recorded more sightings of wild wolves than any other person, he has a treasure trove of information and it is a dream of mine to meet him one day, now retired)

- L. David Mech (wildlife research biologist; focuses on large carnivores, mainly wolves, A+ dude who I would love to meet one day)

- Douglas W. Smith (wildlife biologist in YNP; project leader of the Yellowstone Gray Wolf Restoration Project, another dude I’d love to meet, now retired)

- Mark Bekoff (biologist and animal behavior extraordinaire; I’ve seen some info   such as intense vegan ideas (?), but I don’t think he would be labeled as an ARA, on the advisory board for Project Coyote (which I’ve heard has some ARA tendencies though I’ll have to double check), has worked with Mech)

- Thomas McNamee (author; served on the board of the Greater Yellowstone Coalition, I don’t think he’s a biologist but I may be wrong)

- Carter Neimeyer (wildlife biologist; was also a trapper for the government and a wolf recovery coordinator in Idaho, now retired)

- Daniel R. MacNulty (assistant professor and I think biologist?; involved in the Yellowstone Wolf Project since reintroduction (1995), hard to find info on but he created a very important book along with others Wolves on the Hunt which will be covered in this post)

- Other: Nate Blakeslee (author), Jim and Jamie Dutcher (authors), Aldo Leopold (author and biologist), Ernest Thomas Seton (author and naturalist), Daniel R. Stahler (biologist, YWP lead biologist to be specific).

Another note is that I was originally going to create a google doc with more info on these books, including ISBN numbers, cheapest ways to find the books, basic info, etc. but I realized that I could also put that here to prevent me doing extra work as this post already has so much. I will list the Amazon (hate the mega corporation, but I realize its the only option for some) and Thriftbooks, but eBay, Abebooks, and others may be of use too. Note: This post was written and published on 7/25/23, so prices may vary in the future!

I also may add that at the end of the majority if not all of these books is a long reference section filled with amazing resources. I usually highlight any of interest and save them in a doc for future use!

Some of these books are older and may be more expensive. If the book is old enough, sometimes there may be a pdf of it available online, all you need to do is google it! To find only PDF’s, search up the following: filetype:pdf (insert book name here).

An example using a real book is as follows:

I am all for supporting authors, so I’d recommend buying said books to read if possible instead of using certain sites that allow you to use them for free. Unless it’s like, a mega corporation run by shitty people, then have at it.

Lastly, the longer ago the book was published the more you should fact check it with more recent information. I’d venture to say anything before 1981 or perhaps even 1990 should be fact checked, juuuuust in case. For example, a the first book listed under books to avoid was published in 1981, and is now considered outdated. I am going to include books published before or around that just to see how ideas and theories on wolves have changed over the years.

Now that we got that covered, it is 12:03 PM, on to the books!

American Wolf by Nate Blakeslee

This book is an amazing source about wolf 06′s life, aka 832F, in YNP.  Not only does it follow the anonymous identity of the hunter who killed 06 and gives an insight on his part of the story, but it also follows the ordeal of wolves in court during 06′s life (2006 - 2012) and has personal insights from Rick McIntyre who followed and recorded data and sightings on 06 from her birth to death. I will warn you though, every time I read and reread this book I am brought to tears because of 06′s beauty and final days, as well as the reaction even the biologists had upon her death, who usually are professional and try not to be emotionally invested in the animals (which isn’t always the case). All above, a 10/10 book which will leave you stunned and amazed and bawling.

Find it at a bookstore or on Amazon for $13.99 and Thriftbooks for $4.39 to $5.79.

The Alpha Wolves of Yellowstone Series by Rick McIntyre (not in order, The Reign of Wolf 21, the Redemption of Wolf 302, The Alpha Female Wolf, The Rise of Wolf 8, and more to come!)

Rick McIntyre is a name you will see a lot on this list, namely for his knowledge on wolves, which he not only got from viewing wolves in the wild every day for roughly 9,000+ days but also from working in YNP, beginning as the worlds first Wolf Interpreter with the social/public side, and then along with the biology side of the project. His books cover the in depth lives of the wolves he’s watched over the years along with various science tidbits and research. An all around 10/10 series from someone who you may just catch watching wolves in the park early in the morning if you’re in the right place at the right time! Note: will also make you cry.

You can find some of these at a bookstore, but I’ve had hard luck with others. Wolf 8 and Wolf 21 are usually in stores, but the others are usually bought online via Amazon or others.

(In order)

- Wolf 8: Amazon $17.95, Thriftbooks $13.89

- Wolf 21: Amazon $17.95, not seeing any on Thriftbooks at this time

- Wolf 302: Amazon $25.99, Thriftbooks $17.49

- Wolf 06: Amazon $17.99, Thriftbooks $22.40

Wolves on the Hunt by L. David Mech, Douglas W. Smith, and Daniel R. MacNulty

This book may just be the biggest published treasure trove of information on wolf hunting accounts there is. From elk and bison to beaver and snowshoe hares (and fish!), this book covers real life, in the moment accounts of wolves hunting their prey. It covers wolves in YNP, Voyageurs National Park, Isle Royale, Glacier National Park, and so on and so forth, giving you an array of wolf hunting behavior in various areas. A must have that took me a while to get through.

Find it at a bookstore or on Amazon for $54.00, not seeing one on Thriftbooks.

War Against the Wolf: America’s Campaign to Exterminate the Wolf by Rick McIntyre

I know I’ve spoken highly of all the books on here so far, but I cannot emphasize how important this book is. War Against the Wolf is the end all be all of history accounts of how society in the US’s views have shifted and altered throughout history. From the moment white people came to the US and starting killing wolves, to the present day, it covers a lot, really helping you understand what wolves have had to go through. !!Trigger Warning/disclaimer for this book!!: I will note that a lot of topics touch on the cruel and terrible treatment of the wolves, coyotes, various wildlife in America, and the Indigenous in this book. If you have a big sensitivity to animal abuse and cruelty, maybe skip this one, as it covers horrendous treatment of animals. Regarding Indigenous peoples’, the book will mention a few ways the Native Americans were treated poorly, whether it be through being paid less for bounties for animal carcasses, to the scalping of the Indigenous along with wolves and others (yes you read that right, wolves and other carnivores such as cougars and coyotes were scalped by mainly white dudes who wanted them for a bounty). Though this book is very important in understanding the trials wolves have faced, it is not worth triggering yourself.

Hard to find in bookstore, if possible, but it’s $25.19 on Amazon, not seeing one on Thriftbooks.

A Society of Wolves: National Parks and the Battle Over the Wolf by Rick McIntyre

This book is somewhat of a beginner-ish/introduction to wolves. It was made around the same time as wolves were being/thinking about being reintroduced into YNP. It covers basics, like the life and growth of pups, the pack dynamics, hunting behavior, etc. but nothing too in depth. It’s a bit of a lighter read, but still a very good one!

Very hard to find at a bookstore, if possible, but on Amazon for $18.69 and $6.89 on Thriftbooks.

Decade of the Wolf: returning the Wild to Yellowstone by Douglas w. Smith and Gary Ferguson

It’s been a hot minute since I read this one, but from what I remember is has “portraits” of wolves, AKA snippets of their life in YNP. It has a fair amount of details regarding their lives and iirc some insight on their behavior. It’s truly a sweet book and really made me think about their individual lives and quirks more than I already did.

Haven’t seen it in a bookstore, but maybe? On Amazon for $16.95 and Thriftbooks for $6.69.

Books That I Have Yet to Read or Haven’t Read in a While

Now, here is a list of books I’ve read too long ago to recall correctly, or just haven’t read at all. These books are also important, and I’m excited to get my hands on them (whenever that happens) or reread. This list won’t be as in depth as the above one, but it will lead to certain links that’ll give you a description of said books.

A Wolf Called Romeo by Nick Jans

About a wolf who befriended various dogs in Alaska (wolfdog speculation?). $13.99 on Amazon.

Vanishing Lobo: The Mexican Wolf in the Southwest by James C. Burbank

About the disappearance of Mexican wolves in the south/southwest. $3.72 on Amazon.

Canids of the World: Wolves, Wild Dogs, Foxes, Jackals, Coyotes, and Their Relatives by Dr. Jose R. Castello

About various canines throughout the world. DISCLAIMER: Through a few sources and research of my own I have discovered a few things about this book: 1. the coyote section is very poorly put together and one shouldn’t take too much info from it, if any, due to many inconsistencies and mistakes. And 2. there is a section on foxes about arctic foxes specifically, but the animal pictured is actually either a silver marble color morph (no, not a Canadian Marble fox as that is not a thing and so help me if I see it again I will smack someone on the head with a stick) or a Georgian white color morph on a red fox (pretty sure it’s the marble but don’t quote me on that!) and is NOT a arctic fox. All that being said, probably don’t rely on this book too much without other info, sources, and double checking claims. $21.99 on Amazon.

Biology and Conservation of Wild Canids by David W. Mcdonald and Claudio Sillero-Zubiri

Not just about wolves, but a great in depth read on canids. $37.83 - $88.00 on Amazon just for a paperback.

The Wild Canids: Their Systematics, Behavioral Ecology and Evolution by Michael W. Fox

Not entirely sure what this book entails, but I’m looking for it anyway! $26.95 on Amazon.

Wolves: Biology, Ecology, and Conservation by L. David Mech and Luigi Boitani

A very good and must have book for canine lovers in general. $30.00 on Amazon.

Wolves of the World: Perspectives of Behavior, Ecology and Conservation by  Fred H. Harrington and Paul C. Paquet

Although very expensive, I’ve heard good things about this one, so I’m betting it’s worth it. $72.95 on Amazon.

The Grand Lady of Yellowstone: & Other Wolf Stories by Brad A. Bulin and Carolyn Bulin

A lovely book on what I believe is mostly wolves in YNP, but could also be about ones elsewhere. $14.95 on Amazon.

Wolf Island: Discovering the Secrets of a Mythic Animal by L. David Mech

Another lovely book by the legend of a biologist himself. It’s also more recent, so it’s likely to have up to date information.

The Wolves of Minnesota by L. David Mech

$23.04 for paperback on Amazon, cheaper in hard cover.

Wolves of Denali by L. David Mech

$27.02 in paperback on Amazon.

The Arctic Wolf: Ten Years with the Pack by L. David Mech

$29.80 hard cover on Amazon.

The Way of the Wolf by L. David Mech

$17.46 on Amazon.

Wolves of Isle Royale by L. David Mech

Want a break from the Yellowstone wolves? Check the books based in Minnesota out! $28.24 on Amazon.

Yellowstone Wolves: Science and Discovery in the World's First National Park by Douglas W. Smith

$32.55 on Amazon.

The Wolves of Yellowstone by  Michael K. Phillips and Douglas W. Smith

$19.99 on Amazon.

The Killing of Wolf Number Ten: The True Story by Thomas McNamee

$11:94 on Amazon.

The Return of the Wolf To Yellowstone by Thomas McNamee

$9.65 on Amazon.

Wolfer: A Memoir by Carter Neimeyer

A book on a wolfer (a name dubbed to one who kills wolves, usually way back when with violent techniques) turned advocate. $8.62 on Amazon.

The Wisdom of Wolves: Lessons From the Sawtooth Pack by Jim and Jamie Dutcher

The book I am currently reading. Not about wild wolves but instead about a pack that was captive bred and brought in for a film. $11.99 on Amazon.

Books on Wolves to Stay Away From

The following book(s) are things that are either poorly written or completely and utterly false. Keep an eye on these and take what they say with a grain of salt. 

The Wolf: The Ecology and Behavior of an Endangered Species by L. David Mech

This book was amazing at the time of it’s publishing, but throughout the years Dave Mech even admitted that he wasn’t fond of it’s popularity, mainly due to the section on “alphas” and wolf hierarchy that we now deem false. For these reasons I probably won’t read this book and wouldn’t really suggest it due to it’s outdated material.

Online Resources To Look Into (and Avoid)

The following resources are sites or other material you can use to find more information on wolves:

- The International Wolf Center (where I get a lot of my wolf news)

- The International Wolf Center YouTube Channel (a great place to observe and learn about wolf behavior, body language, etc. while you watch the ambassador wolves on camera interacting. Their FB is mainly promotional stuff but it also is a good source for information on upcoming events about wolves)

- The Wolf Conservation Center (they have a YouTube channel too, but I have yet to actively check it out, but I’d suggest looking into it for fun just in case. I think the FB group is similar to the IWC’s FB as mentioned above)

- The Voyageur's Wolf Project (the wolf study project in northern Minnesota)

- The Voyageur’s Wolf Project YouTube Channel (lots of trail cam footage and cool stuffs!)

- The Voyageur’s Wolf Project Facebook (here me out; FB is a cesspool BUT the VWP actually have a lot of very good posts on their page about the wolves they work with, just, maybe be wary when going into the comment section)

- I am hesitant to share this because I don’t want a sudden rush of people joining to clog up systems, but it’s still a good tool. If you go to this site or this FB page, you may be able to get access to the ancestry and lineage of the wolves of YNP, available on ancestry.com. I think you need an account on the site, but hopefully you don’t absolutely need to do the genetic test for yourself in order to access it. If you are able to figure out the instructions, please be kind, courteous, and not pushy when you contact the person who runs it because they are a person too.

- Bonus: You know I have to plug my favorite game; if you’re into more casual learning, the video game Wolf Quest, a game I’ve played going on 12 years now, is completely based on realism down to the genetics and behavior of the animals in game. The developers get a lot of their information from the IWC and wolves in YNP, even directly from biologists! Their blog also shows some interesting facts being implemented into the game, so it’s a win win.

A couple things to avoid is, of course, Facebook groups and general social media things. The above groups mentioned may be okay (just be wary of the comment sections), but any sort of media that seems problematic, AKA people interacting with wildlife, any ARA behavior, general endangerment of animals and other people, should be avoided. I’d also venture to say that anything that really pushes the dominance/alpha theory is a no go. I know some biologists still use the term loosely, but that’s for a few reasons that I will make a post about in the future.

Conclusion

In conclusion, I hope this post was helpful for as many people as possible. My instinct is to try and keep this information, frankly because I’m worried something bad will happen if I share it, but my therapist says that’s just anxiety, so hopefully she’s right.

Of course, you do not have to look through all the books and resources here. These are all from my personal research and I try to be thorough; you will not be any less of a “smart” person by not looking into everything.

(tw slight mental health talk ahead, just for this paragraph) So... yeah! It’s 3:23 PM as of now. I’ve spent roughly five hours on this post and I hope it helps maybe just one person. Wolves have quite literally saved my life, in fact the first time I read Rick McIntyre’s books I was in an inpatient hospital for an eating disorder. The wolves and their stories reminded me that I have to keep going, not for me, but to help them. I’m doing better now, and am planning a tattoo in wolf 8, 21, and 06′s memory for helping me through that dark time.

Anyway, enough with the sappy stuff, go on and gain some knowledge, I hope this helped! <3