#The Deviant 1 Review

[dispatchdcu]

The Deviant #1 Review

The Deviant #1 Review #thedeviant #deviant #comics #comicbooks #news #art #info #NCBD #comicbooknews #previews #reviews #Amazon #image #imagecomics

Writer: James Tynion IV Artist & Colorist: Joshua Hixson Letterer: Hassan Otsmane-Elhaou Cover Artist: Joshua Hixson; Dani; Andrea Sorrentino; Sean Phillips; Christian Ward; Bermejo Publisher: Image Price: $5.99 Release Date: November 15, 2023 Christmas shopping reminds Michael that he can’t wrap Christmas presents. His friend Derek agrees: he’s terrible at it. Why does this bother Michael so…

[melaniem54]

Review: Dearly & Deviant Daniel (Dearly and The Departed #1) by L.A. Kaye

Rating: 3.75🌈 Dearly & Deviant Daniel is the first in a new series, Dearly and The Departed, by L.A. Kaye. Centered firmly in the popular trope of main characters who’re able to see and converse with the dead/newly departed, Kaye’s MC is Mortician Keir Dearly, of Dearly & Son Mortuary, a business that’s been handed down through generations of Dearly men. He’s been able to see and talk to the…

[spiderbitesandvampirevenom]

that anon yesterday really ground my gears so lets quickly review some historical facts:

1. white men get accused of rape, pedophilia, and incest, and more often than not escape any form of tangible consequence. this is especially true when their victims are people of color.

2. men of color get accused of rape, pedophilia, or incest, and get lynched before there's even a trial. these accusations often come from white women to escape consequences for sexually assaulting the man in question.

3. rape and pedophilia have been used as forms of colonial-imperial violence to enforce white supremacy by both white men and women who, shocker, almost always got off with any consequences. and yes, its an issue that is still incredibly, horrifyingly relevant today.

4. people of color have been systematically painted as sexual deviants, incestuous savages, rapists, and child predators by white society from the moment they met us, which was then used to justify hundreds of years of enslaving, torturing, raping, and murdering people of color across the globe.

so, to review and add it all together:

rape, pedophilia, incest, and other forms of sexual violence are, first and foremost, an extension of violence, NOT sexual desire. treating sexual violence as solely an expression of desire is a privilege of white heteropatriarchy. when people of color open admit to wanting to engage in acts of sexual violence, they get killed. when white people do it, they make a new porn category for it.

[lo1k-diamonds]

✔ Advent Calendar 2024 💜

It's the most wonderful time of the year🎶

It's here, the giving season! And while I love advent calendars and already have one for coffee and one for chocolate, I thought what about one for fics? Though I won't be writing, no - I'll be reviewing and recommending wonderful treats! You'll get juicy suggestions, and our lovely writers will get some love for Christmas! And at the end? I will post a bitey gift :p

How does it work?

Every day, I'll reblog this post and add a card with the fic of the day - I'll give some details, a quote, and a fleeting thought. The selection is based on what I've read this year that got my attention, 1 author a day, multiple AUs and tropes! (check the warnings for the fics individually!)

I hope you check them, and if you do, don't forget to show them some love ✨💜

🎄Here we have it, folks! You'll find every suggestion in the list below:🎄

The Demon Is In The Details by @colormepurplex2

Demon!Jimin x f.Reader / Crossroads AU / angst, smut

"You’re now mine forever, little mouse."

⟢ So absolutely delicious how one mistake changes everything, not just for some silly humans, but also for a demon who thought nothing could surprise him anymore! [my review]

——✨Bonus! Beware The Thorns✨

Yoongi x Jungkook x Jimin x f.Reader / Mafia, Step-Sibling AU / Taboo, angst, smut

"There is only one thing left standing in our way, angel."

⟢ I have no excuses - this is potentially the most indulging, deviant, steaming hot fic I've ever read! It lives in my mind rent-free, thanks Leah! [my review]

Sweet by @oddinary4bts

idol!Seokjin x f.Reader / Idol post Military AU / angsty, smut

It feels like, maybe, you were his all this time too.

⟢ There are so many sweet things about this story: the way that Jin thinks and feels, that he apologizes and expresses regret, that OC is believable and well-rounded, that they both take a chance, and make a decision, not because of a momentary lapse of judgement, but out of genuineness... It's a little treasure! [my review]

✨Bonus! To Give a Helping Hand✨

Idol!Jungkook x f.Reader / Idol AU / smut

He’d be feral with you – he’s feral just thinking about you.

⟢ I don't think this fic needs introductions, and I have reblogged it before, but still, couldn't keep myself from mentioning it again! [my review]

Effet Mer by @spideyjimin

Jungkook x f.Reader / Healing AU / angsty, smut

Hot sex with Jungkook in Nazaré is a combo you never thought you needed.

⟢ There. Is it a spoiler? Potentially. Do you all need to read about what goes down? Absolutely! [my review]

The Price by @daechwitatamic

Yoongi x Hunter!f.Reader / Snow White AU / angst, smut

Maybe you do love him. You just can’t forget - not for a second - how little it matters.

⟢ Unhappy ending? Nonsense! It hurts just a little - just right - just perfect. [my review]

✨Bonus! Of Ruin✨

Prince!Taehyung x f.Reader / Supernatural AU / mystery, fantasy, smut

"Even when I think I’ve seen the true measure of you - you surprise me again and again."

⟢ This is one of the best stories I've ever set my eyes on. It's compelling, rattles you to your bones, and you'll be thinking about it for eons! READ IT! [my review]

The Taste of Sin by @shadowkoo

Taehyung x f.reader / Warlock/Witch AU / angst, smut

This is exactly why they say to never mix business with pleasure. It makes such a mess of things.

⟢ Woah, this was intense! The warnings and things made me approach this with so much caution, only to be swept off my feet! [my review]

Spin Cycle by @miscelunaaa

Jungkook x f.Reader / Uni AU / slow burn, strangers to lovers, smut

He’s never going to complain about a girl having sweater paws while wearing his hoodie.

⟢ I read this by the pool side with a glass of wine and couldn't put it down. It's such an easy, good read! Also, confession: I forgot it had smut! And it's good too! I guess the story just really is that good! [my review]

Lifeline by @downbad4yoongi

Namjoon x f.Reader / First responder AU / brother's bf, smut

I won’t break…but it never hurts to try.

⟢ Wait, hold up, time out - can we just talk about how hot this fic is? But first, let's address how the propelling event of this story is the bane of every woman's existence. [my review]

Protecting the Bloodline by @kth1

Prince!Hoseok x Human!f.Reader / Vampire AU / angst, smut, royal

Little dove… In a world full of twisted beings, how have you turned into such a kind woman?

It's so hard to find words to describe this story... It's both incredibly beautiful and so full of pain, that I just... I'll start by recommending it. [my review]

Vigilant(e) by @yoongihan

Lawyer!Yoongi x Prosecutor!f.Reader / Law AU / angst, smut, secrets

We can’t be casual.

When I started reading this, I had no idea where it was going, but it turned out to be a perfect light read to swoon over Min Yoongi. [my review]

Of Crowns and Daggers by @mrsparkjimin18

Prince!Jiminx Princess!f.Reader / Arranged marriage AU / royal, angst, smut

We’re not so different, you and I.

⟢ I really like royal AUs, but add a sprinkle of plotting, inner conflict, and romance, and the combination is an absolute delight. [my review]

Bewitching by @taegularities

Prince!Jungkook x Human!f.Reader / Vampire AU / angst, smut

I think… falling in love with you was– was inevitable anyway. But the fear…

I blush every time I read this. It's such a perfect blend of deep, maddening love and fear... of overpowering longing... It's achingly gorgeous. [my review]

Jealousy by @mikrokosmoslove

Namjoon x f.Reader / FWB AU / f2l, fwb, angst, smut

Yeah, but that also means it ends when one of us starts dating!

I didn't expect this entry, but when I read it, it automatically clicked for me—fwb is a sweet downward spiral. We all know how it ends and still fall for it every time. [my review]

Timeless Rhythm by @bratzkoo

time lord! hoseok x archaeologist! reader / Adventure AU / mystery, romance, fluff

The rest, as they say, was history. Or perhaps, in your case, it was the future.

Woah, this was so different and refreshing! Going on such adventures always risks the timeline, but we wouldn't have it any other way! [my review]

Wicked As They Come by @caelesjjk

vampire!yoongi x reporter! f reader / Fake dating AU / romance, smut

Don’t forget who you’re talking to with that smart fucking mouth, little monster.

I'm here to discredit this author - this is not just mostly porn - this is mostly awesome porn with a sprinkle of feelings - and our asshole vampire Yoongi doesn't do feelings 😏 [my review]

Safe Haven by @kth1fics

Werewolf!Jimin x Princess!f.Reader / Supernatural AU / royal, shifters, angst, smut

He does the things he does because he loves you.

This story is absolutely endearing, with a perfect sprinkle of sacrifice, lifelong love, and perfectly timed confessions 💜 [my review]

Angel by @sailoryooons

Mafia!Yoongi x Sex worker! F. reader / Mafia AU / Semi-established relationship, smut, fluff

I need you to do whatever it is you need to do to protect yourself.

As far as Mafia AUs are concerned, this fic is the standard. If I had to choose a top, this would be in the top three, at least. If I had to choose a perfect Yoongi, you know it—this one would be it. [my review]

Fists and a Smart Mouth by @pars-ley

Namjoon x (f)reader / Cowboy au / E2L, angst, smut

I can assure you, I'm more of a 'violence is the answer' type person, in case that wasn't obvious already.

Ouf, this was a hard pick (because all Ley's stories are great), but it was also super easy. Of course, I didn't choose it because it features Namjoon. I chose it because the mystery takes its time to unravel, revealing a gripping plot until the end. [my review]

——✨Bonus! Red thread of fate✨

Vampire!Seokjin x human!(f)reader / Soulmates au / Angst, fluff, smut

Does listening to my heart not make you thirsty?

It's not often that a vampire fic delves not only into themes of fate but also into selfless, boundless love, and this story is one of those with an interesting catch within it. [my review]

Alpha by @borathae

Alpha Dom!Jungkook x f. Omega sub!Reader / ABO au / E2L, angst, smut

We really shouldn’t be doing this, fuck, this shouldn’t happen.

Step aside while I shamelessly drool all over this piece of indulgent heaven. [my review]

——✨Bonus! Bonded✨

Alpha Dom!Jungkook x f. Omega sub!Reader / Arranged Marriage au / E2L, angst, smut

I just needed to know that this wouldn’t be lost forever.

The way I consumed this sequel. When I finished reading Alpha, I didn't know what could happen next, and this direction surprised me. [my review]

The Surface by @moni-logues

prince merman!Hoseok x sea witch!reader / The Little Mermaid AU / angst, smut

You could bend reality, but that didn’t mean you always saw it clearly. The heart had tricks of its own.

Can you imagine how excited I was when I saw a Little Mermaid retelling? And then realized I'd be the sea witch? Fuck yeah! [my review]

Saudade by @chateautae

idol!taehyung x choreographer!reader / Secret relationship AU / angst, smut

I was doing it for you! The reason was all for you, for us!

It's always interesting for me when authors use words native to me to describe feelings that are not translatable - like saudade. So yes, I had to read what Taehyung was up to, and I was not disappointed [my review]

The Creamed Pie by @moccahobi

Succubi!Seokjin x human!reader / Demon AU / slow burn, angst, fluff

If you're trying to live like a human, you're failing.

This story is such a spark of fun! Everything, from the lore to the characters, the relationships, the name of the shop, the quips and the way it doesn't take itself seriously -- until it does. [my review]

——✨Bonus! Amor Erratur✨

Yoongi x reader / Dystopian AU / angst

Oh how he would love to be married to her. 

This story is set in a dystopian world, and it is so out of the ordinary and unique not just because of the world-building but because of Yoongi. [my review]

Seven Days by @hisunshiine

nurse!jungkook x teacher!reader / FWB AU / age gap, angst, smut

Every hour, every minute, every second, he’s in love with you.

As soon as I read the summary, not only did I think it was a clever idea for a series and someone had to do it, but I also knew I'd end up feeling very personally about it. [my review]

Oath in the Moonlight by @jamaisjoons

crown prince!namjoon x cursed maiden!reader / Soulmates AU / fantasy, angst, smut

Because I no longer want just one night. Not if it’s with you.

This is such a rich, fulfilling story, with captivating worldbuilding, dramatic twists, and lots of love. [my review]

Christmas Fix by @yoonia

Taehyung x (f)Reader / Secret Baby!au / S2L, angst, smut, Christmas fic

I suppose this is what people call a Christmas miracle.

I had to leave the most Christmassy fic I've read for the end. Leave it to none other than the Queen to make a new classic filled with drama and plot twists.[my review]

Down Bad by me 💜

Vampire!Jimin x human(f)reader / Soulmate AU / angst, smut

Kissing you was not on the agenda, and it threw him off. How the fuck was he supposed to let go of you now?

I can't review my own fic, but this is my gift to you 🥰🎁✨

[tin-wufborf]

Tin's Favorite Sterek Fics (Part 6)

Hello, hello, hello, and welcome to the sixth installment of this little series of mine! Thank you all again for likes and shares on the previous parts. You all continue to blow me away with your support for this project of mine. Once again, smooches and squeezy-hugs to you all! But only if you want them.

As a quick heads up, we're entering into the "December 2012" era of fics, so you might start seeing a bit of a Christmas theme going on for a for a little bit. Generally, I don't prefer Christmas fics myself, but I'm a sucker for kid and pack fics (you may have already been able to tell), and those tropes tend to work well in a Christmas setting. Consider yourselves warned!

Okay, that's all from me for now. Ta-ta!

List and link to previous/next part(s) below the cut.

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DISCLAIMER: This is me warning you all that some of the fics I've included in this list may cover explicit, dark, and/or "taboo" subject matters. I cannot express enough how little I care what anyone thinks about any of that; all I want is for you to use caution when reading anything I've listed here and to please review and heed whatever tags the authors have provided in order to keep yourselves safe. Your experience from this point on is your own responsibility, not mine and not the authors'.

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Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11 | Part 12 | Part 13 | Part 14 | Part 15 | Part 16 | Part 17 | Part 18 | Part 19 | Part 20

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Nothing Satisfies Me But Your Soul by fadedhues (NR | 1/1 | 1,259)

“My name is Death,” he sings softly, and it’s fucking pretty, like he’s singing a lullaby to the winter sky, “and the end is here.”

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must be a devil between us by hoars (NR | 1/1 | 2,081)

"What? Why would-- Derek, why would your daemon encourage mine to touch you?" Stiles fakes calm well, but his heart gives him away.

"Because Luminera is a deviant." He shrugs. He accepted Luminera's reckless behavior years ago.

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souls of mischief by hoars (M | 2/2 | 2,695)

Stiles’ first memory of his mom is green.

Her green eyes, her green dresses, her green scarves, her green blouses and her green barrettes.

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with the darkness fed by Rena (NR | 1/1 | 2,835)

It takes him several tries to dial the right number; his hands are slippery with blood (warm and sticky and bright red) and his entire body is shaking with the aftermath of puking his guts out, his breath is burning in his lungs and the phone keeps eluding his grasp.

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What Could Have Been by thingcalledlove (G | 1/1 | 2,971)

The camera zooms in on the face of a very beautiful woman who looks vaguely familiar.

“Who’s the babe?” Stiles jokes, turning to look over at Derek.

“My mom,” Derek replies with a glare.

“Oh, shit, dude, I’m sor—” Stiles breaks off his apology as his eyes drift back towards the screen. Beside Mrs. Hale is another familiar face. One he hasn’t seen in a long time. His mother.

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I Don't Want To Be Saved by Lapin (M | 1/1 | 3,132)

And everyone, everyone has their own ideas about this relationship, they all say the same things, they all do. "He's not good for you," "It's Derek," "This is the fourth night in a row," "What kind of asshole dates a high schooler?" "I'm not okay with this."

But Stiles pulls the red hood up, wanders from the path, and he's picking flowers, and he's breathing, "My, what big teeth you have," and Derek bares his fangs, and yeah. Fuck them.

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Will Wonders Never Cease by thecheekydragon (T | 1/1 | 3,632)

Sheriff Stilinski wonders how Derek Hale fits into his working theory of a gigantic, two-ton pissed off moose shot-putting his son’s jeep.

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Practically Perfect by betp (NR | 1/1 | 3,688)

WE NEED A NANNY PROBALLY. Reqirments: - eyes light up - wants to go places - can travel between dimentions - likes cheesebergers - a wear wolf - lisens to good music - SUPER STRONG - favorit color is pink - has friends who can fly - will merry our Dad

There is a stick figure drawing of a werewolf with red eyes and bared teeth, marrying Stiles on a cloud.

Or, "The one that has next to nothing to do with the kids." This is a straight-up unapologetic Mary Poppins AU.

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Laura is Badass by hoars (NR | 1/1 | 5,079)

Laura's not expecting two teenage boys to burst into the bakery, brandishing lacrosse sticks yelling about “Kidnap!” and “Pedobears!” and “Sex slaves are illegal!”

She’s flabbergasted.

“Cupcake?” Derek offers.

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When You Stop Believing in Santa You Get Underwear by owlpostagain (T | 1/1 | 7,817)

There are some salvageable things though. A virtually untouched heavy slate sign that says, engraved in an ornate script that confirms at least one person in the Hale family had a sense of humor (Stiles has a horrible suspicion it might have been Peter), When You Stop Believing in Santa You Get Underwear.

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Beltane by DevilDoll (E | 1/1 | 8,254)

"Watching Stiles heal someone has always been a little uncomfortable for Derek, like he's seeing something intimate and private that shouldn't have an audience. That's nothing compared to how it feels." This is an AU in which Stiles has magical healing powers.

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Your Words Are Robbery by dedougal (E | 1/1 | 12,127)

When Stiles is dragged back to Beacon Hills, he has to face everything he left behind.

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cool story, bro by drunktuesdays (E | 1/1 | 13,087)

Based on a truly ridiculous conversation with Kalpurna about a hypothetical Stilinski Twins situation that ended up sounding something like:

“FUUUUUUCK, is it a sweet valley high situation where Stiles is very aware that his twin is way more attractive and confident than he is, EVEN THOUGH THEY'RE IDENTICAL, and he always ends up with the hotter significant others and more friends and Stiles guesses that's why he's attracted to the pack at first, because it's something that's just his, not his twin's too. But of course, Stiles's twin gets bit and now he's part of Derek's pack, and Derek doesn't snap at him like he snaps at Stiles, never slams him into things, fucking FIGURES, STILES'S TWIN GETS EVERYTHIIIIIIIING.”

Kalpurna/good ideas OTP.

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Stay. by paradis (E | 1/1 | 15,537)

He leaves because the press of Derek’s lips and the sting of his teeth against Stiles’ neck are still burning his skin, and he can’t stop touching them, but then he remembers Derek telling him he’s not pack, he never was, and that he doesn’t belong here.

He leaves because Lydia asks him too, but he doesn’t go back to Beacon Hills because no one asked him to come back.

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What To Expect When You're Expecting (A Litter of Sourwolf Puppies) by Brego_Mellon_Nin (E | 1/1 | 17,422)

The Sheriff sighs and plops down in a chair opposite his son.

“Stiles, I’m going crazy here. We need to get you to a doctor. You sleep like you’re trying to get into the Guinness Book of World Records, and your eating habits are bizarre! You vomit around the clock and for some reason only the tea your mother used when she was pregnant will get your stomach to settle down for any length of time. Is there something you aren’t telling me? Can werewolves get guys pregnant? I’ve noticed how you look at that Hale kid-”

Stiles meeps and flails, sloshing tea down his front. Luckily it’s not scalding anymore, but still hot, so he jumps up and wrenches his shirt off.

“God, dad, no! Guys can’t get pregnant, that’s ridiculous, it’s like...”

“Like werewolves being real?” his dad questions, deadpan.

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Home by coffeeinallcaps (E | 1/1 | 18,464)

Derek has bought a beautiful house. Stiles can't stay away. (In which everyone hangs out at Derek's place all the time and Stiles tries but fails not to fall for a certain socially inept alpha.)

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Assistant to the Consulting Detectives by idyll (T | 9/9 | 18,674)

Stiles is going to NYU and ends up working for Sherlock and Joan.

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Metamorphsis by happyevraftr (E | 1/1 | 20,755)

Life isn’t easy for Stiles Stilinski. This is a truth he’d come to accept a long time ago, so it’s no surprise when an enemy pack shows up in town with a mysterious Alpha that’s hell bent on revenge. Things escalate quickly when Erica goes missing and Isaac is attacked by the new pack. As if that isn’t enough to handle, Stiles own body begins to betray him and he must decide whether to die as a human, or live as a werewolf.

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The Birthday Fic by seussian (E | 1/1 | 21,066)

It's Derek's 30th birthday, and Erica and Boyd have been kidnapped. Again.

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Tutor!Verse series by betp (10 works | NR-M | 41,579)

They meet when Derek is seventeen and hates history almost as much as he hates his ex, Kate, and Stiles is sixteen and taking junior-level history classes. Then they fall in love and do dates on each other and I didn't mean for any of this to happen. By which I mean Sterek fic!

1. Not Another Sterek Romance (It Is Absolutely Another Sterek Romance) (T | 1/1 | 2,405) In which Derek is the worst at history and Stiles wears glasses. 2. Boys, Interrupted (NR | 1/1 | 1,329) "I am the result of your academic ennui," Stiles summarises. 3. Jeepin' (M | 1/1 | 1,368) Stiles warns Derek four days in advance, resulting in Derek unable to concentrate in any of his classes that Friday, because all he can think about is his impending gay deflowering, which--jesus fucking christ. 4. Peer Pressure (T | 1/1 | 1,615) "Can't even answer a simple question, he's too good for that. I hope he knows what we do to kids who are too good to talk to us." 5. Golden (NR | 1/1 | 947) "It's like a recipe for a summer romance movie from the 80s." 6. Catch Me a Catch (NR | 1/1 | 1,828) In which Allison will never understand Stiles' sense of humour, Scott will never understand what Stiles sees in Derek, and Derek wonders what he would spend his free time doing if he'd never met Stiles. (The answer is CoD and literally nothing else.) 7. Education (NR | 1/1 | 2,990) "I'll try anything once." He pauses. "With you. Only with you."

In which Stiles and Derek have been dating for three years, and Derek decides to try something new. 8. Viridian (NR | 1/1 | 5,967) "Dude, forget Stiles." 9. Biological Imperative (NR | 1/1 | 2,206) "I want to have children with you someday," Derek interjects firmly. "Not that I know why I seem to think that would be a good idea." Tin here. Just wanted to pop in and say that this part (part 9) is the conclusion to this series as the next part is a WIP reboot of the series.

10. i brought my pencil (NR | 3/? | 20,924) Your typical, classic nerd/jock au, but with a shittier attitude. (A reboot of this series. Sorry guys.)

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[shepscapades]

Hiii I LOVEEEEE your DBC AU so much!!!!! You've given me a concerning level of brainrot =w= I just have question about the new part that just came out: why is Etho going crazy? Is it bc of the trauma? Or is it smth else?

HI thank you!!! <3 It’s been mentioned here and there (I think I talked about it in the Part 1 post), but it’s probably not a bad idea to recap every now and then for any new folks. (I then proceeded to write everything out more detail than I’ve ever talked about it before!) so hopefully this makes things a little more clear! Gbjdghkvjm

Etho, who was still trying to get used to a full range of emotions on top of his first life series, had a REALLY hard time with how Last Life ended— the adrenaline and fear of Death Games’ Survival of the Fittest and being pit against all of his friends is one thing, but something about his relationship with bdubs was so much more important to him, and he essentially blames himself for bdubs’ permanent death in the series. He vividly remembers (has recorded + logged the memories of) himself telling bdubs he wouldn’t give him a life unless he killed one of the other reds— remembers bdubs saying he’ll kill to earn the life, remembers him looking so earnest and determined, vividly remembers the moment the message rang out that Bdubs had gotten his kill, and the message that Grian had killed Bdubs shortly after.

Etho never quite forgave himself for being the self-perceived reason bdubs dies (after all, he should have just given bdubs the life if he really cared and wanted him to survive), and he takes this grief back with him as they return to Hermitcraft Season 8. As someone who’s very new to feelings of guilt and failure, you can imagine how hard he took this— reviewing the memories again and again, trying to understand why he made those decisions, realizing how selfish he is, comparing his “failure to protect bdubs” to when he was first assigned to Bdubs, when he sacrificed himself to keep Bdubs safe.

As the moon situation escalated and hermitcraft got increasingly busy, Etho couldn’t find it in himself to confront bdubs (maybe not seeing himself fit to deserve bdubs’ forgiveness, or fearing Bdubs’ disappointment or anger with him) and his fears and regrets kind of slowly ate away at him until it shut him down. It’s actually a recurring theme for Etho that, because of the damage he sustained from the creeper blast that caused his deviancy, his systems are actually kind of fragile when it comes to pushing them to their extremes. When he feels an extraordinary amount of overwhelming emotion, his thirium pump starts to work in overdrive, and thirium starts leaking from all of the places his shell is cracked— his face, his shoulder, and his arm.

So the idea is that, Etho returns to Season 8 trying to… more or less forget about what happened— except he can’t, he’s obsessed with what happened, and his emotions start to overwhelm him until thirium starts to leak and whatnot. But I think deviants are fairly used to “dismissing” warnings, as sometimes their thirium pump will skip, their temperature will rise, or other system updates may happen when they feel certain emotions, and Etho is so distracted (or. Trying to be distracted) that he doesn’t realize he’s dismissing Thirium Loss notifications until it’s too late. He begins to shut down with Last Life on his mind, and the system errors that follow are all garbled out.

This technically happens before the moon destroys the server, which means etho is offline, or broken, or what have you, when the server gets destroyed, and this is actually what truly glitches him out. When Xisuma and Doc try to reboot him at the beginning of season 9, Etho’s system is caught on a glitch: Etho had shut down thinking about last life, so his programming is trying to eliminate the threat who killed bdubs as an attempt to fix what happened (bdubs dying). Etho’s trying to eliminate grian (who isn’t a threat anymore, because this isn’t last life, last life was ages ago) but he’s not thinking straight and can’t process anything beyond the Desperation+Fear+Guilt. Since Grian’s not in the room, he goes for the next best thing: the person who might be able to tell him where Grian is: the server admin. Doc just gets in the way of Etho trying to get to Xisuma, so Etho “decommissions” Doc in an attempt to remove him from the equation.

So um. Yeah! That should be everything more or less explained… hopefully it also clears up some details you may or may not notice in the comics! Etho starts leaking thirium throughout the destruction comics, Etho goes for Xisuma first… Etho having memory flashbacks of Last Life. If anything is particularly confusing feel free to ask more questions! But it’s kinda nice to be able to write out how I’ve logic’d out all of this happening in my head hehe (i plan on posting the DBHC Etho playlist soon with a brief explanation of each song in Etho’s timeline, so hopefully that will help too!) :]

[evidence-based-activism]

Hello, is it true that the difference in crime patterns between men and women matches sex and not gender identity?

Hi!

So, unfortunately, there is shockingly little research on this. There are a lot of anecdotal reports and some non-peer-reviewed attempts, but little to no peer-reviewed and/or professional reports.

In addition to that, this topic has become severely (even unconscionably) politicized. (The issue with this will become apparent later.)

As such, I will report on what we do have ... but please keep this limitation in mind.

---

The main peer-reviewed publication I can find on this topic was a 2011 Swedish study [1]. Sweden's population data collection makes it possible for them to conduct a "population-based matched cohort study," which provides reliable results. Their paper directly states:

regarding any crime, male-to-females had a significantly increased risk for crime compared to female controls ... but not compared to males ... This indicates that they retained a male pattern regarding criminality. The same was true regarding violent crime. [emphasis mine]

Unfortunately, this is where the politicized nature of this topic causes problems. Likely given the vitriol aimed at any researcher who publishes data "unfavorable*" to transgender individuals (e.g., the threats aimed at Hillary Cass [2] or the fact that some evidence has been deliberately suppressed by interest groups), the author attempted to walk back the facts laid out in this article.

*I use the word unfavorable here because that is how the community perceives it. I want to be explicit, however, in noting that much of this work would ultimately be beneficial for the community (e.g., the Cass review). It simply does not fit into their current narrative.

Thankfully, this unscientific distortion has been addressed [3]; unfortunately, this occurred after some had already misused her comments. To summarize, the attempted refutation does not consider taking the birth sex into consideration, instead attempting to draw conclusions about the entire transgender cohort as a whole. Given the claim being made is specifically about transwomen, such reasoning obviously cannot be used to refute said claim.

---

Unfortunately, this is the only prevalence study I can find. (Again, likely due to the politicization of this topic.)

There is some other work that is tangentially related. For example, this study [4] finds that both being male and "masculine" are related to greater aggression, and this study [5] finds that both being female and "feminine" are related to reduced deviance.

Unfortunately, however, neither study (1) provides the necessary information required to draw conclusions about transgender individuals or (2) is actually concerned with criminality itself (i.e., both aggression and deviance are not necessarily criminal). In fact, both studies are more so lending support to the idea that female gender-socialization (i.e., acting "like a woman") is what underlies these differences.

In other words, the fact that more "femininity" is related to less aggression/deviance does not necessarily mean males with a "feminine" gender identity are less aggressive/deviant. It's also simply possible that women express less aggression/deviant behavior the more they conform to "feminine" gender roles.

This possibility is supported by the data from [1] indicating that transmen exhibited male-typical levels of both crime and violent crime. It's possible, here, that this arose from their conformation to masculine gender roles.

In addition, this "performance of gender" may also contribute to why it appears that gay men commit less crime than straight men and gay women commit more crime than straight women [6, and this post]. And, of course, this sexuality-based difference likely means that the crime rates for transgender people should also be split by sexuality, such that the rates for heterosexual and homosexual transgender people are examined separately.

(I also want to make a note here that the fact that the evidence for a difference in crime rate between gay and straight women appears to be strongest specifically for traffic offenses. In addition, the other two studies above concern aggression and deviance (e.g., tobacco use, marijuana use, etc.), both of which can be non-criminal or at least non-harmful. I'd personally argue that feminine gender roles require over-suppression of aggression, to a point that is maladaptive. In other words, I am not suggesting that "masculine" women are harmful to society.)

---

I sometimes see people reference the demographic make-up of transgender prisoners in an attempt to determine their crime rates, and I understand the urge – given the conspicuous absence of data on this topic – but I want to emphasize that we cannot determine a prevalence or incidence rate from such data. There are simply far too many secondary factors that would affect such data (e.g., do other demographic differences affect what transgender people are accused of/reported for/convicted of? Are they more or less likely to receive a particular sentence? etc.) along with the simple and frustrating fact that many reports categorize data by "legal" instead of "biological" sex.

That is not to say this information isn't useful. If you're willing to do a bit of digging and statistics, it is. But it also can't be used to answer Anon's question.

---

All in all, early research results suggest transwomen maintain male-typical criminality whereas transmen may attain male-typical criminality. Other work supports the possibility that gendered socialization and/or performance of gender roles is also related to crime patterns. The degree to which this "overrides" biological sex patterns is unknown.

Hopefully, some better research on this topic is conducted! Until then, we will simply have to proceed with these preliminary results.

References under the cut:

Dhejne, C., Lichtenstein, P., Boman, M., Johansson, A. L., Långström, N., & Landén, M. (2011). Long-term follow-up of transsexual persons undergoing sex reassignment surgery: cohort study in Sweden. PloS one, 6(2), e16885.

Editor, J. B., Social Affairs. (2024, April 19). Hilary Cass: I can’t travel on public transport after gender report. https://www.thetimes.com/uk/healthcare/article/hilary-cass-i-cant-travel-on-public-transport-any-more-35pt0mvnh

Murray, K. (2021, April 21). ‘Long-term follow-up of transsexual persons undergoing sex reassignment surgery: Cohort study in sweden’: a review of dhejne et al’s findings on criminal convictions. Murray Blackburn Mackenzie. https://murrayblackburnmackenzie.org/2021/04/21/long-term-follow-up-of-transsexual-persons-undergoing-sex-reassignment-surgery-cohort-study-in-sweden-a-review-of-dhejne-et-als-findings-on-criminal-convictions/

Dolliver, M. J., & Rocker, D. L. (2018). Addressing a divide in the conceptualization of the gender-crime relationship: A comparative test of gender and sex using general strain theory. Deviant Behavior, 39(12), 1552-1565.

Nofziger, S. (2010). A gendered perspective on the relationship between self-control and deviance. Feminist Criminology, 5(1), 29-50.

van de Weijer, S. G., van Deuren, S., & Boutwell, B. B. (2024). Same-Sex Relationships and Criminal Behavior: A Total Population Study in The Netherlands. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 1-16.

[antisocial-mochi267]

JIMIN fic recs oneshot PART 1

Hope it helps to find you the great fics! Hope it helps!! And please leave a comment/like/reblog or any reviews guys the writers should receive the appreciation they deserve (I'll be eventually adding more fics here)

Minors strictly DNI

And if you want recs about any particular trope or au I'm always willing to help 👀🤗

Oneshot :-

Fluff :- ☁️

Angst :- 🥀

Smut :- 🔥

Crack :- 🎃

Personal Favourite :- ✨

1. you.Me.us__ ☁️🔥🥀 (stalker, yandere , thriller) @kosmosguk

2. Driver's license __ ☁️🥀✨ (coming-of-age, one-sided!au, brother's bestfriend!au) @gyukult

3.while you are at it __ ☁️🔥(pool boy jimin, divorced reader). @aureumjeon

4. I need you __ ☁️🔥🥀(exes to lovers, oneshot, idol au) @hisunshiine

5. Crystal snow __ ☁️🥀✨ (figure skating!au, fantasy!au, king jimin, supernatural power). @minniepetals

6. Vampire's garden__☁️🎃(College student jimin, fantasy, dark fantasy, vampire au). @ebonyinktea

7. soliloquy __☁️🎃 (Angel jimin× human reader). @kinktae

8. schrödinger’s cat__ ☁️🎃✨(guardian angel jimin, comfort) @dovechim

9. Azure blue__☁️🎃✨(Adventure, Fairy!Au ) @jimlingss

10. The pull of the tides __☁️🔥(surfur au, Strangers to lovers) @goldenscript

11. Fairytale__☁️🎃(merman jimin × human reader) @gukyi

12. Rock bottom __☁️🥀🔥✨( Idol!Jimin, establishedrelationship!AU, marriage! AU) @jkbabiey

13. Boats against the current __☁️🎃✨ (Hogwarts au, opposite to lovers). @gukyi

14. Into the wilderness __☁️🥀🎃✨ (camp counselor!au, unrequited love!au, friends to lovers!au) @gukyi

15. Lover to lean on__☁️🥀🔥🎃✨ (neighbour au, flower shop au, it's more complicated) @sketchguk

16. Paper bandits __☁️🎃(highschool au, S2F2L) @vantaenims

17. Blowing dandelions __☁️🥀🔥(badboy jimin, e2l, childhood friends, college au). @httpjeon

18. Grinch in law__☁️🥀🔥✨(fiance to marriage, bad to good mother-in-law, established relationship) @mercurygguk

19. Cut me free__☁️🥀🔥(Demon Yandere jimin ) @sopejinsunflower

20. Earnestly yours __ ☁️🎃✨(Highschool au , enemies to lovers , actor au) @gukyi

21. Theophany (To Paint a God) __☁️🥀🔥 (college!au , Old Friends to Lovers , Best Friend’s Brother!Jimin , Bisexual!Reader , Dancer!Jimin , Painter!Reader) @ilikemesometaetaes

22. Hello__ ☁️🥀🔥✨(exestolovers!au, high school pining, adult love, slice of life au ) @gyukult

23. Only you __ ☁️🔥 (single dad jimin, best friends to lovers au) @personasintro

24. Hell-ish__☁️🎃 (establisedrelationship, kinda fun date) @jtrbluv

25. 20 things and continuing I Hades about you__☁️🥀🎃✨ (dj famous jimin× pa reader) @readyplayerhobi

26. Just a little bit of love(is all you really need)__☁️🎃 (gymnastics au) @gukyi

27. Poster boy __ ☁️ (highschool au, social anxiety, comfort) @versigny

28. He's pretending__☁️🎃✨ (Enemies-to-lovers (kinda, jimin is in deniel but lowkey wipped) Daemon!Jimin x Faerie!Reader, fantasy au). @crystaljins

29. Adonis __☁️🎃 (firefighter jimin, s2l ). @xjoonchildx

30. Red gardania__☁️✨ (ballerina au, secret admirer, kinda e2l ) @joyfulhopelox

31. Shake shack __☁️🔥🎃(stranger to crushes to lovers) @kth1

32. The happiest place on earth __☁️🎃🔥 (Disneyland actors au, slice of life au) @dovechim

33. The midnight pack __☁️🎃🔥 (wolf au, S2L) @jjungkookislife

34. Terrible liar__☁️🥀✨ (F2L, pinning , comfort) @writtenwhalien

35. All that glitters __☁️🥀🎃✨(kinda soft Yandere/ tsudere jimin , Obsession) @deepdarkdelights

36. Deviant affairs __☁️🔥🥀(new Yandere stepbro jimin ) @yandere-society

37. Believe it __☁️🥀🔥✨(friends to enemies to lovers (it’s more complicated though)+ bet AU , high school to after high school) @writtenwhalien

38. Love you a latte__☁️🎃(Yandere Jimin, Stalking, Masturbation, obsession, it's kinda angsty though) @worldwidemochiguy

39. Heartbreak Insurance__☁️🎃✨ (insurance agent jimin× fraud reader, S2 F2 L) @jimlingss

40. Wicked obsession __🔥☁️(University AU, friends with benefits, unhealthy obsession) @peachypinkygloss

41. Love pages__☁️🥀(Yandere, highschool au, supernatural kinda) @jimlingss

42. The devil's own luck__☁️🥀🎃✨ (demon jimin , Slice of Life). @jimlingss

43. Beneath the water __☁️🥀🔥🎃✨(merman jimin× human reader, mermaid au, fantasy au). @jungshookz

44. His hoodie my hoodie__☁️🔥🎃✨ ( S2F2L, college au) @yoongihime

45. Kiss the girl__☁️🎃 (Disney land prince jimin×waitress girl, f2l, whipped) @sketchguk

46. Devil's advocate__☁️🎃(devil jimin ×human reader) @7cypher

47. No need for dreaming__☁️🎃(roommate au, clumsy jimin, frenemies to lovers) @ve1vetyoongi

48. Nine to five__☁️🎃🔥(softie smut, fwb2L, Dr. jm) @jiminrings

49. Just a taste__☁️🥀🔥🎃(Vampire jimin, established relationship). @yoonieper

50. Safe haven__☁️🥀🔥✨(royal king’s guard werewolf!jimin × princess reader, forbidden love au, medieval royal au) @kth1fics

51. Spiral__☁️🥀✨(Time traveler Jimin, teenager! reader, underground fighter! Jimin, time jumps, violence, blood, supernatural) @i-am-baechu

52. Red flag__☁️🎃🔥✨( richboy!jimin x mystery!reader, strangers to enemies to lovers to potential plaintiff) @xjoonchildx

[calchexxis]

Bleed For Me - Chapter 1

Written for Amestris_Duran. Read on Ao3.

In the sunless city of Artemestra, there are three types of people; the Pure, who were born without the taint of sorcere, and who make up the majority. About eighty-four per cent of the population is designated pure by age thirteen. Then, there are the Aberrant—those cursed with sorcery—although that aberrancy rarely manifests before puberty. They make up roughly twelve per cent of the remaining population, though many are purged before they can fully mature.

The remainder are the Touched.

They are the most blessed and the most cursed. The ones granted gifts by the Watchers On High with which to hunt the aberrant and protect the pure. All children who display the signs are taken to the great Fortress-Cathedral of Saint Ilya, Patron of the Holy Hunt, and are trained to become the finest hunters of monsters and nightmares. They are the holiest of holies, and the noblest souls, for their very flesh is made sacrosanct by the Watchers and by countless hours spent in purification. Each one trains endlessly with their gift, of which thousands have been recorded in the annals of Saint Ilya, to best serve the Papacy of Artemestra.

There are many general names for these gifts; Kenning, Blessing, and Ordainment are among the most commonly used in ritual and amongst the populace of the pure. Among the hunters themselves, though, as well as their supporters, only one name is ever used.

They call it ‘the knack’.

Knacks are studied extensively by clerical scholars of the faith. They are examined, cross-examined, peer-reviewed, and codified so as to best assign their use in the Deviants War that we wage every dawnless night of our lives against the minions of the Vast. Whenever a new knack is discovered, it’s a sign of great good, and of the Watcher’s favor, although it has been over two decades since the last time a truly unique knack was recorded in the annals.

That knack belonged…belongs to Gabriella von Zeidlr, and I have loved her since the day I first laid eyes on her.

I took the corner hard, grinding my heel into the concrete pavement as I bolted down the alley. Greaternight fell heavily in the lesser districts of Artemestra, where the miracles of sunlight enjoyed by the high districts only dimly reached, and the alley was almost pitch black for it. The streets were lit by towering streetlamps of heavy steel, their precious sunstones held within a cage of thrice-blessed silver and gold, but they were few and far between down here, nothing like bright enough to fend off what was chasing me.

The funny thing is, I’m not even really sure why I’m running. In theory, I suppose I could make for one of the gates demarcating the district borders. They’re beastly things of the heaviest metal attached to great clockwork steam engines that lift and drop them at the command of the gate engineers, and are more than enough to hedge out an aberrant. I would have to be very lucky to make it that far, but again, in theory, it was possible.

I’m not running toward the gates. I’m not running anywhere.

I’m just running.

Tears streak down my cheeks as I bolt past the polished windows of backalley shops. Though nothing else of them is clean, the panes are always polished, because it is said that a clear reflection turns back ill will and the sorcery of the aberrant.

All it shows now is the juddering zoetrope of my passage as I sprint. My long red hair flies behind me like the torn pennant of a beaten army, and my lightly armored habit and skirts flare raggedly around my ankles, the hems stained with blood and mud. My lungs are burning with exertion, and the muscles in my legs feel like they’ve been filled with molten lead, but still, I run. It has nothing to do with where I’m running, after all.

I run because she’s chasing me.

I run because it’s the only thing I have left to give her.

There’s a whistle of passing air, and then the dim cut of light at the far end of the alley ahead of me abruptly blackens as a figure lands between me and it. I only get a glimpse of her, but it’s enough to set my heart racing anew. She’s as beautiful as the day I met her. As beautiful as every day that I was blessed to see her thereafter.

Even in the dark, her skin was like pale gold, and her hair fell like straight sheaves of buckwheat over her shoulders and down her back. Her stature was heroic, with broad shoulders, and a lean, sharp jaw, and she was still wearing her hunter’s garb; a tunic of silk stitched with silver prayers, over a long flare skirt slit nearly to the waist, offering sinful flashes of gorgeously muscled thigh and calf. Gabriella’s thigh sheath was bare of its guardless silver athames, lost in her last battle, but still…

Morning, bless me, but she is as beautiful as the day she died.

“Oh, Mirabelle.” Her voice was the same husky rasp as ever. The voice of someone leaning in close, breath hot on your ear, to tell you a secret. “Where are you running to?”

I throw my shoulder against the door to my immediate left and bash it open, barreling into the building—an old, abandoned hostel—because it is my only other route besides turning my back on her and retreating. I’ve never turned my back on Gabriella von Zeidlr in my life, and won’t do so now.

Her laughter follows me down the hall, and despite myself, I smile. Every inch of my body is slick with sweat as I hit the stairs and take them two at a time. In my single glimpse of her, limned in the dim light of the alley, I saw her as I knew her in sunnier days, and in all respects save for one, she was the same as ever I remembered her. The Gabriella I have had the great honor to fight beside, to support, and to heal at the end of her missions, had always possessed eyes of the most fervent emerald green.

The Gabriella chasing me has eyes the color of blood.

It occurs to me as I take another turn into an empty hall that the word ‘chase’ doesn’t really do justice to what Gabriella is doing. Chase implies, in my own mind, some measure of equal footing, although I’ll admit that may be my own linguistic biases showing themselves. Rather, I will call what Gabriella is doing now ‘pursuit’. 

The aberrant has touched her, and she is no longer the hunter that I knew. Now, she is the predator and I am the prey that she pursues. I am the mouthful of meat and blood that will sate her when she finally catches me, and she will catch me at her leisure, not mine. I know that no matter how far or how fast I run, I won’t escape. I know that she could catch me at any time, were she to truly try.

Instead, she pursues me patiently. She lets me tire myself out, wear myself down, and only once I have collapsed onto the floor, panting and gasping for breath, unable to do more than swat ineffectually at her claws, will she fall upon me. I’m not sure what it says about me that the thought of that makes me smile all the wider. Nothing good, I’m sure. I don’t care, though. I no longer care for the doctrines beaten into me since my girlhood, nor do I care for the imprecations of the priests or their condemnations. The day that Gabriella von Zeidlr died, I lost my mind, and now I am fleeing her pursuit for the last time because it is the only way that I can show her my love anymore.

I take turns blind, sprint up stairs, but no matter how far I go or how quickly I move, I cannot escape the sound of her laughter. Every moment, I swear I can feel her breath on my neck and her teeth scraping the skin just beneath my ear, but when I cast my gaze back, the hall behind me is empty. She haunts me now much as she ever did.

But all pursuit comes, eventually, to its timely—or untimely—end.

The last hall I turn down is a dead end, but I keep running. I run for the room at the end of the hall and throw myself against the door. It holds fast, sturdy despite its age, and I stagger back, pull the pneumatic pistol from the holster at my hip, and blow the lock to splinters. The silversteel stake fired from the barrel buries itself in the floor beyond the door that I kick open, and there, at the far end of the room, is a window.

I don’t remember how many stories up we are, but at this point, I don’t think it matters, so I run for the window, and I don’t slow down. I run, jump, and curl into a ball with my arms and legs guarding my vitals as I throw myself at it.

But my reflection is not what greets me in those half-polished panes.

Perhaps I should mention now what Gabriella von Zeildrs ‘knack’ was that made her so terribly dangerous. It gave her eyes where no eyes should be, and doors and windows where no one ought to be able to reasonably reach. Every reflective surface, which was said to be a shield against the touch of sorcere, became, for Gabriella, a gateway.

In the annals, it is called: Mirrormere.

A pale hand, whose fingers taper to delicate claws, emerges from the wide window pane to catch me fast by the throat. Her grip is like iron, and I choke as my momentum comes to a crushing halt. My vision swims, and I flail helplessly against the corded muscles of her arm, but to no avail. The glass ripples like water, and beyond it, I can see not the alley that should be past the window, but instead the distorted image of Gabriella, with her eyes of arterial red meeting mine.

She drifts through her glass gateway like a wraith, suspended in the air by some unearthly will. I am worn to the bone; my red hair hangs lank and matted to my face and shoulders with sweat, I grip her wrist with no strength in my fingers, and I can barely muster the energy to kick my legs at her as she emerges fully into the empty room.

And then she smiles at me, and tears cut tracks through the dust on my cheeks as I see the predator glint in her eyes and the flash of dim light off of her bone-pale fangs.

“Caught you.” Even in the dimness of greaternight, there is something luminous about Gabriella as she carries me across the room, suspended above the floor like a puppet.

Something that stirs a primal warmth in my belly.

I throw a kick at her abdomen anyway. I won’t give up. I won’t let whatever is left of my Gabriella see me roll over and die, even though that’s exactly why I’m here with her. Maybe it’s madness, but I cannot live without my Gabriella. I will not live without my Gabriella. It matters not that I didn’t tell her the truth when it could have meant something—that I only ever dared to show my love for her in the polished shine of her weapons and the careful stitching of her armor and garment wards. It matters not that the only time I allowed myself to touch her bare skin was to wipe away the blood from her wounds and suture them closed, when all I wanted was to kiss each scar on her body until I reached her lips.

I showed my love for her in all of those ways and more.

Now, I show it one last time in this game of cat and mouse.

“Mirabelle…” Gabriella’s voice is a husky purr as she says my name. “Why did you have to come back?” I swear I can hear a hint of her old voice in there. Something almost like grief colored with exultation. “Why did you have to tempt me again?”

I work my jaw soundlessly, trying to speak around a closed throat.

She continues to drift forward, carried by whatever unseen will has untethered her from the laws of gravity, until my back is pressed against the wall. I kick again. I scratch and claw and fight with all my fading strength, and Gabriella just watches, smiling beatifically as I drag red lines on the skin of her hand and rest, land my knee against her gut, and kick at her knees, until I quite literally can more no more, and only then does she accept the kiss of terra firm once more. 

She lowers down until her bootsoles settle softly onto the creaking floorboards, then continues to lower herself, bending at the knee and letting me slide down until I’m seated and slumped against the wall. Her grip loosens, then pulls away, leaving a palm-shaped bruise on my throat, and I gasp for air as she takes my chin between a finger and thumb.

“Mirabelle.” Her voice is a rosy whisper as her eyes start to glow from within, going from red to luminous scarlet. “My darling Mirabelle…you’ve always taken such good care of me.” Gabriella presses the pad of her thumb to my lips. “Let me make your death sweet.”

I kiss the soft skin she offers me. It’s all I have left in me. She smiles all the brighter at that. Her hand falls to the hem of my skirts and lifts them, pushing them past my knees as she reaches between my legs. I shiver as I feel Gabriella push my soaked underthings aside, and I don’t miss the way her smile widens further when she feels the state of me. I am not ashamed anymore, though. I’m not ashamed of the way I used to muffle my voice at night as I cried out her name while I pleasured myself, nor of how I let my eyes linger on her in the baths, or how my hands would rest on her longer than necessary when I was tending her wounds.

“That’s my girl,” Gabriella murmured as one finger—then two—slipped inside of me, and one arm looped around my back to cradle me against her. “That’s my Mirabelle.”

Another shiver rolled through me as I leaned against her and tried to pretend that she still smelled of sandalwood and blade oil, and not like a butcher’s shop. “I’m sorry, Gabby,” I choked out even as I rocked my hips against her fingers. “I sh-should have been with you…should have—”

“Ssshhh…” Gabriella nuzzled against my neck, then lolled out her tongue and ran it up my neck and over my cheek, lapping up the trickle of tears that were left there before moving her lips to the lobe of my ear and whispering, “You’ve never done anything wrong in your life, my Mirabelle.” She curled her fingers and pressed the pad of her thumb to my clit, dragging a ragged cry of pleasure from my lips. “You’re sweet and darling, and perfect in every way, and I have thought so since that day I laid eyes upon you, and every night thereafter. Don’t you know that every hunt was not to protect this blighted city, but to protect you and you alone? For you? My raison d'etre?”

Gabriella’s fingers find new and pleasing places that even my own had never touched. I wonder if it’s because she knows and has known me so well for so long, or if it's simply because she is the one touching me. Her cool skin soothes the fire inside me, even as it coaxes more lewd sounds from my throat. I don’t even try to hide it. I don’t try to muffle myself anymore. I spread my legs further, giving her more space, and mumble her name over and over as she draws back to stare lovingly into my eyes.

I can see her there.

My Gabriella.

I can see her behind the predator she has become. I can see her horror and her guilt and her hatred at what she’s doing and what she’s become. I can see the raw revulsion in her, and I know that she would end herself before harming me if only she could. But the aberrant has taken her, chewed her up, and regurgitated this monstrosity shaped like Gabriella von Zeidlr, and now there is nothing like enough mortal left in her to stop herself.

Oh, blessed morning. She looks so hungry.

I will never have my Gabriella back, but I can still take such good care of her. So I roll my hips and throw back my head, I moan her name and let her see the wanton creature I become every night after I part ways from her. I let her see, in my eyes, her own reflection of that noble huntress; with her gold hair caught in the darkling winds of greaternight, framed by the moon, and flashing like an orphan strip of morning. I let her see, in me, how I would kneel at the altar of holy morning each night that she hunted and pray fervently for her return until either she came to fetch me—bloodied and victorious—or til I collapsed from exhaustion and hunger, as I did the night she died.

Her jaw is hanging open as she grips my waist and starts fingering me with a greater tempo and lust. Her eyes are practically coals, now; burning with need and hunger, and I watch saliva pool at her lips and teeth to drip down her chin as her eyes track away from mine to fixate on my neck.

Then she curls her fingers one more time, pressing against some rough, sensitive spot inside of me, and I cum with a ragged cry. I feel myself spill over her hand, soaking my skirt and thighs, and in that instant of deafening pleasure, her jaw unhinges and she lunges for my neck.

And stops.

I look down at her, waiting for the pinch of pain that will herald my death, and instead find her jaw locked around neck, but stopping just shy of piercing the skin. Gabriella’s fangs are pressing firmly, indenting the flesh beneath them withing breaking it, and I know that just a little more will be my end. The moment she tastes my blood, whatever fragmentary will remains to her will dissolve like candy floss in the rain, and I will die.

“Don’t grieve for me,” I whisper as I watch blood spill from her eyes like tears. “For without you, I am already dead.”

And I turn my head, baring my neck further, and driving her fangs just slightly into my own flesh.

The moment my blood wells from the pinprick wounds and touches her tongue, Gabriella tackles me to the ground, pushing me to floor as she bites hard on my throat. I cry out, half in pain and half in pleasure as she begins to drink deeply, and at the same time her fingers continue to work inside me. I clutch at her feebly, no longer fighting, as I stare up at the window that looks out and up into the skies of above sunless Artemestra, and as my body grows cold, I climax again to my Gabriella’s fingers.

It’s the last thing I feel as this lightless world fades away.

[lemonhemlock]

No because all the anons talking about the Aemond x TB OC self insert fics are so real. Because those are so ridiculous derivative it is crazy

-White haired Targaryen looking child of Rhaenyra, probably named Visenya is either 1- takes after her mother because genetics don't exist 2-is the one trueborn daughter of Laenor and Rhaenyra who was conceived during consummation

-Can sword-fight, ride, talks like a 21st century woman, is a #girlboss and a 3rd wave feminist

-Takes Aemond's eye out as children instead of Luke being the one to do it

-Aemond somehow falls head over heels in love with her because she is #notlikeothergirls and just really really super hot

-Aemond abandons his family, his brothers, his sister, his mother and all the people he cares about to go fight for Rhaenyra because apparently the SI is just so hot and he is so in love with her

-They probably repeatedly have amazing super hot poorly written pre-marital sex but SI ofc doesn't get pregnant but there is no explanation like moon tea or anything

-Aemond calls his family out for being misogynistic haters or something for some reason????

- 639363 pages of Alicent bashing

-Aegon is the devil himself

-SI and Aemond get married and have children with white hair who they name after Rhaenyra and Daemon

-Author somehow managing to sneak in their own opinions that Rhaenyra is the one true heir and her and Daemon are innocent little saints who do no wrong

Just explained the plot of like a min. of 50 of Aemond x TB OC fics

i mean.... yeah :)) good for them for having their fun, but, bless their hearts, i had to check out

at the end of the day everyone can relate to this feeling of frustration when the majority of fics skew in a direction you're not a fan of. and every author should absolutely feel like they can post whatever they want and enjoy themselves; the target audience isn't always you and that's fine. but i simultaneously feel like venting these annoyances with like-minded people in your own space is also not a crime. sometimes we don't like stuff and want to gossip about it. it's really not that serious, everyone has the thinnest skin imaginable these days

it's like we've forgotten how to interact with one another. not liking something is not a personal affront to the person who does like it. it does not require outrage at the expressing of an opinion. it does not require a silencing campaign. you shouldn't expect others to keep quiet all the time just so your feelings won't be hurt. the fuck. especially when, i repeat, the tags can always be muted. what are you even doing interacting with the posts if the mere act of verbalizing a dislike bothers you so much?

there's a world of difference between occasional banter and sending authors hate, leaving disgruntled reviews, telling people to kms or insinuating that on your blog, casually accusing them of being illegal sexual deviants and whatever other deranged insults stans trade like candy and we definitely should stop acting like these two things are the same. you don't have to turn everything into a fight in the trenches

Anonymous asked: Yeah while I don't expect Alicent to be portrayed in every fic as the best mother who has no bad qualities since nobody is perfect it's becoming tiring to constantly read about how she's always trying to actively destroy her children's lives and is to blame for most things including the upcoming war while Rhaenyra is an amazing mother who truly loves her children and can do no wrong, like the worst she'll do is maybe arrange some unwanted marriage to her OC daughter or betroth her to another man who is not Aemond. I've come across to stories in which Alicent was abusive to Aemond for no reason other than she's a bad mother, was physically recoiled by his lost eye, turned and indoctrinated him into a religious extremist just like she's always portrayed in many fics or even tried to have Rhaenyra's daughter be assassinated just to prevent Aemond from defecting to the other side by marrying her and not the Baratheon daughter the greens want him to marry. To some extent I do believe it's very hard to avoid some OOC-ness from these characters since they're being put into new scenarios that didn't happen in canon and everything about this is being left to the author's personal interpretation which will naturally spark some debate whether or not what a certain character's actions are believable within their universe, however, due to the formulaic nature of a lot of those fics most characters (especially green ones if we're talking about Rhaenyra's daughter OCs) are brought to insane levels of OOC just to make their story work. Like yeah, if Aemond has constantly been abused by his mother (not physically necessarily), by Aegon, by his grandfather and, on top of that, Alicent and/or Otto try to have his beloved OC assassinated well, chances are this will make him denounce his family and switch sides sooner or later. Something that would've never happened under normal circumstances. Oh and I've also noticed a trend in quite a few of these fics of using Alys in cheating tropes and always turning her into an evil witch and seductress who tries to separate Aemond from the OC and use him for her own benefits…all I'm going to say is you don't want to see how demented and misogynistic people get about her in the comment sections. Anyway I'm sorry about extending this discussion about Aemond x OC fics and I hope it hasn't attracted too many weirdos who are spewing hate in your inbox!

i pretty much agree with you, anon, not much more to add. :))

[sukunasun]

I'm not the person who sent the sex scenes ask but your writing, altogether, fascinates me so as a lit buff I'll gladly get your recommendation/influences list, for smut and non-smut if you will. I'm soo curious

from one lit buff to another pls send me a list too. or just one book shall do. but make it a rly good one.

warning: keep in mind that these are my preferences so feel free to discuss, disagree, or discard my suggestions completely because 1) read whatever you like. 2) erotica isn't usually my genre of choice (says the person who writes about dick and fictional men) so i have yet to fully explore the plethora of great books waiting to be read.

3) some of the writers and works i've listed below touch upon strong /controversial sexual themes, deviant sexualities, and a tad bit of psychosexual analysis. they are not inherently smut or romance stories but i'm focusing on the writing and how said themes and subject matter are dealt with. they might also require some further reading to get some context, i find understanding and analysing a book makes the experience more worthwhile beyond any initial judgement/review.

4) these are less influences and more informants because i have nothing to pull from irl so i rely on writers to tell me what love and sex is like for them. i wouldn't ever dream of writing this well since my pool of experience is merely a puddle. the fact that my writing fascinates you is praise beyond what i actually bring to the table, so thank you anon, i hope to reach a point where i write about these themes as poetically and profoundly as these writers do.

Delta of Venus by Anais Nin (a great introductory erotic work)

"You do not know what you are missing by your microscopic examination of sexual activity to the exclusion of aspects which are the fuel that ignites it. Intellectual, imaginative, romantic, emotional. This is what gives sex its surprising textures, its subtle transformations, its aphrodisiac elements. You are shrinking your world of sensations. You are withering it, starving it, draining its blood. If you nourished your sexual life with all the excitements and adventures which love injects into sensuality, you would be the most potent man in the world. The source of sexual power is curiosity, passion. You are watching its little flame die of asphyxiation. Sex does not thrive on monotony. Without feeling, inventions, moods, no surprises in bed. Sex must be mixed with tears, laughter, words, promises, scenes, jealousy, envy, all the spices of fear, foreign travel, new faces, novels, stories, dreams, fantasies, music, dancing, opium, wine."

Lady Chatterly's Lover / Women in Love / Sons and Lovers by DH Lawrence (ah yes...the one and only)

"They threw off their clothes, and he gathered her to him, and found her, found the pure lambent reality of her forever invisible flesh (…) the body of mysterious night upon the body of mysterious night (…). She had her desire of him, she touched, she received the maximum of unspeakable communication in touch, dark, subtle, positively silent, a magnificent gift and give again, a perfect acceptance and yielding, a mystery (…)"

Les Liaisons dangereuses by Pierre Ambroise François Choderlos de Laclos (the revenge...the jealousy...the utter malice!)

"I shall possess this woman; I shall steal her from the husband who profanes her: I will even dare ravish her from the God whom she adores. What delight, to be in turns the object and the victor of her remorse! Far be it from me to destroy the prejudices which sway her mind! They will add to my happiness and my triumph. Let her believe in virtue, and sacrifice it to me; let the idea of falling terrify her, without preventing her fall; and may she, shaken by a thousand terrors, forget them, vanquish them only in my arms."

Fanny Hill by John Cleland (this is so old but its most known for its genitalia euphemisms, a.k.a. 'how else do i describe a cock without calling it a cock')

"...and now, disengag’d from the shirt, I saw, with wonder and surprise, what? not the play-thing of a boy, not the weapon of a man, but a maypole of so enormous a standard, that had proportions been observ’d, it must have belong’d to a young giant. Its prodigious size made me shrink again; yet I could not, without pleasure, behold, and even ventur’d to feel, such a length, such a breadth of animated ivory! perfectly well turn’d and fashion’d, the proud stiffness of which distended its skin, whose smooth polish and velvet softness might vie with that of the most delicate of our sex, and whose exquisite whiteness was not a little set off by a sprout of black curling hair round the root..."

Venus in Furs by Leopold von Sacher-Masoch (see also: Bad Behavior – Mary Gaitskill. includes 'Secretary')

“Oh, I am suffering frightfully.” “Poor friend!” she brushed my disordered hair back from my fore-head. “I hope it isn’t through any fault of mine.” “No—” I replied,—“and yet my love for you has become a sort of madness. The thought that I might lose you, perhaps actually lose you, torments me day and night.” (...) “I can no longer live without you, oh wonderful woman,” I said. “Believe me, believe only this once, that this time it is not a phrase, not a thing of dreams. I feel deep down in my innermost soul, that my life belongs inseparably with yours. If you leave me, I shall perish, go to pieces.”(...)“It shall never end,” I cried excitedly, almost violently. “Only death shall part us. If you cannot be mine, all mine and for always, then I want to be your slave, serve you, suffer everything from you, if only you won’t drive me away.”

The White Hotel by D.M. Thomas (a fictional fmc writes to a fictional freud and psychoanalysis ensues)

Emma by Jane Austen (my fav austen book and the prime example of the friends-to-lovers trope. matchless wit and charm. knightley still makes me swoon to this day)

James Joyce's letters to his wife (i picture nanami writing this while huffing and puffing in anxiety as his stuttering, fountain-pen gripped fingers spill ink alongside his guts onto paper)

"My darling Nora, I am panting with eagerness to get your replies to these filthy letters of mine. I write to you openly because I feel now that I can keep my word with you. Don’t be angry, dear, dear, Nora, my little wild-flower of the hedges. I love your body, long for it, dream of it. Speak to me, dear lips that I have kissed in tears. If this filth I have written insults you bring me to my senses again with the lash as you have done before. God help me!"

Lust, Caution / Half a Lifelong Romance / Love in a Fallen City by Eileen Chang (see also: Cosmopolitan Love by Sijia Yao as a further read in understanding the ideas of chinese love and western love)

The Kites by Romain Gary (i recco'd this a few months ago and i'm bringing it up again!)

"I really don't know where I had come up with the idea that love could constitute the whole of life's work and meaning. Probably I had inherited this total lack of ambition from my uncle. Perhaps, too, I had loved too early, too young, with all my being, and there was no room left over in me for anything else."

Crash by J.G. Ballard (i read this after watching the movie adaptation, it's definitely edgy but also violent so proceed with caution)

Tropic of Cancer by Henry Miller (gah. i had to power through this but he writes so viscerally. sex is life and also death)

"She rises up out of a sea of faces and embraces me, embraces me passionately--- a thousand eyes, noses, fingers, legs, bottles, windows, purses, saucers all glaring at us an we in each other's arm oblivious. I sit down beside her and she talks--- a flood of talk. Wild consumptive notes of hysteria, perversion, leprosy. I hear not a word because she is beautiful and I love her and now I am happy and willing to die."

Frenchman's Creek by Daphne du Maurier (my beach read pick about the constraints of women and the timeless fantasy of lusting after a pirate or what it ultimately symbolises—freedom)

"There was silence between them for moment, and she wondered if all women, when in love, were torn between two impulses, a longing to throw modesty and reserve to the winds and confess everything, and an equal determination to conceal the love forever, to be cool, aloof, utterly detached, to die rather than admit a thing so personal, so intimate."

THANKS FOR MAKING IT TO THE END. these are some that piqued my interest, there's a whole lot more i can't remember atm but i hope they're enough for now. do look them up before diving into them in the case of any triggering subjects. and check out other works by these authors too if you like them. thank you for sending in this ask and happy reading!

[dubraskaramos]

THE LITTLE GIRL WHO LIVES DOWN THE LANE 👱🏻‍♀️🔪👦🏻

Synopsis:

Rynn, a thirteen-year-old girl, lives alone with her father in a house at the end of a lane in rural Long Island. With her father absent most of the time, she has become an independent and feisty girl, making use of the great prodigious intelligence with which she was blessed.

However, a little girl being alone most of the time is the best way to attract deviant and foolish people...

Hi, and welcome to my first review. In this case, I will be talking about “The Little Girl Who Lives Down the Lane”—an unnecessarily long title, but enchanting enough—published in 1974 by the writer Laird Koenig. This book also has a film adaptation, but in this article, I will only discuss the book.

In this review, I will be looking at the most notable characters in the book. You can skip any of the characters I am going to talk about, but if you read them in order, it will be easier to connect the dots.

I hope you enjoy this as much as I do :)

I. The beginning (Chapters 1-6).

At the very beginning of the story, Rynn, our protagonist, is preparing to celebrate her 13th birthday. Despite getting to celebrate her birthday alone—since, apparently, her father is too busy to pay attention to her— she seems to be happy with the solitude that's around this special date: October 31st.

Her birthday ritual is interrupted when a man comes to the door, coming into the house without permission, when Rynn opens the door.

The story goes slowly. It takes time to develop itself through the pages, especially at the beginning. You get to know Rynn, her daily lifestyle, her environment, her desires, and the people that are around her. You don't know what's exactly wrong when you start reading and follow the story through the lines, but there's that peak of interest—even if the reading starts to get too slow for the sake of your concentration capacity—that keeps you going even when you want to stop just for a minute.

The first 5 chapters, I would say, go slowly without a hurry, and it's within those chapters where you start to get a little bit of consciousness and say, “There's something wrong with this little girl.”.

It's obvious that her father's nowhere to be seen. He's not inside the house, and Rynn doesn't want anyone to enter her solitude and peaceful life. She just wants to live her life alone in that comfortable house, take care of all the responsibilities that come with it, and stay like that without further interruptions.

The first time we see her interacting with someone else is, precisely, on her birthday, October 31st. A knock on the door resonates around the house, making her turn off the music and take a cigarette to fill the room with its smoke. She opens the door and sees him, a man standing right before her eyes: Frank Hallet.

There's something uncomfortable and weird about the fact that there's a man inside the house that's not her family or friend, an adult alone in the living room talking to a little girl with such “confidence.”. You feel like you're standing next to Rynn, wondering what to do and how to feel, where to run, and how to affront a situation in which you are so small and helpless.

We'll talk about this man later on because there's so much tea to spill about him.

He insisted several times on getting to meet her father, asking questions such as, “Where is your father?” and, “Why are you celebrating your birthday alone?”. She always replied the same thing, “My dad's a poet,” and, “I can't disturb him while he's working.”. During this first chapter, we get to know about her muse named “Gordon.”.

Although the situation remained calm—even if it was uncomfortably weird—things were going smoothly until the man decided it was a good idea to spank the girl, but not before making some rather weird comments. Rynn, furiously, turned around to face the man. He leaves the house without any regrets but rather laughs at the fury in the girl's eyes! Seeing the man walking down the lane, the girl closed the door and locked it.

And from this moment, we get to know Mrs. Hallet, Frank's mother, and Miglioriti, the fond policeman.

II. Miglioriti

Miglioriti is one of the first characters we meet in the book, if not one of the most charismatic and important. He's a grown-up policeman who shows up at her door right before chapter 6.

The purpose of introducing him right before the first plot twist is simple: you know there's someone who could find out what she's doing, and at the same time, it fills you with that uneasy feeling of expecting the worst-case scenario now that you know that the authority is rounding her house.

I'll be honest: I was hoping for him to get more protagonism in the plot of the book, but at the same time I think it was a genius idea to make him leave the town just in time. He's not just another selfish adult who doesn't care for Rynn; he is there for her and everything she needs him for, and he's the only adult who was able to go through that ice heart of hers. He won her heart and her trust even if she wasn't ever really honest with him at all.

Even if I think his character was able to be and do more, I think he's a neat character. Its purpose is clear; you know he's a threat, but you still can't help but feel comfortable and uncomfortable at the same time in his presence. He is charitable and kind to Rynn, providing her with intellectual, gentle, and, to a certain extent, brotherly company.

I wouldn't say that the relationship between Miglioriti and Rynn was paternal. I feel that if that had been the case, Miglioriti would have been more present in Rynn's life, and things might have even gone a lot more awry in the plot. Instead, Miglioriti appeared at the right moments, offering support and calm to Rynn, who was too smart for her own good and the good of others. He knew she was smart and clever, too clever, and he didn't look down on her like other adults did. They were on the same level without neglecting Rynn's childlike position.

Miglioriti's presence was a constant that I expected as the pages turned. I wanted him to appear, even though I knew that his presence would be anything but good for the plan that Rynn and Mario were trying to sustain.

By the time he confesses to Rynn that he's leaving town, I felt like my whole world was falling apart. Rynn would now be alone, and she coughed at not being able to confess the truth to Miglioriti because she simply couldn't. It wasn't a viable option to tell him all the things she'd done, nor was it an option to let him know that she'd dragged Mario into her crimes as well. She couldn't complain or refuse; she didn't have the power to refuse.

Miglioriti is a supporting character, you could say. He represents an understandable obstacle but also a helping hand; a contradictory world that draws you in.

I am grateful that Miglioriti did not end up dead.

III. Hallet

Here I am going to touch on the subject of the Hallets, both Frank Hallet and Mrs. Hallet. What can I say about these characters? They are hateful, and they pretend to be so from the beginning.

Both Frank and Mrs. Hallet are recurring characters in the plot, mostly because of the feeling of being stalked by them. On the one hand, Mrs. Hallet detests foreigners, anyone who has not been born and raised—by family lineage—there, and above all, she repudiates Rynn. As for Frank Hallet... he is a deviant.

While the fact that Frank Hallet is a deviant makes it all the more twisted, I was fascinated by the way the author managed to make you feel small and helpless in front of authority figures, especially Frank Hallet. When Frank enters Rynn's house without permission while she is with Mario, I feel genuine dread of the situation. Every move, word, and sound the character made me feel like I was just another little girl standing in that room, knowing that at any moment this man could lose control of himself. There is one part in particular that I loved precisely for this reason: when Frank Hallet throws Gordon, Rynn's mouse, into the fire, the only thing that connected her to her completely lonely past that no longer existed.

At that point in the book, I felt, as I mentioned, like another little girl standing in the corner of the room with Rynn and Mario, watching their every move in horror. I felt helpless and powerless; I couldn't imagine what must be going through Rynn's head.

Both of them—Mrs. Hallet and Frank Hallet—are antagonists who don't need to be overly dramatic to work. They prove that to be a good antagonist in a story, all you need to have, in my opinion, is the following: a purpose, a questionable ideal/moral/ethics, and a personality of your own beyond the circumstances.

The main problem I see in today's series and books is the need to make the antagonists exaggeratedly tragic, with convoluted backstories, as if they wanted to tell the viewer that the antagonist of their project is valid because he has very strong reasons behind him. Humans, if we are honest with ourselves, are very simple. We function according to our belief systems, and that is more than enough to make someone a perfect antagonist.

Frank Hallet only needed his weird attitude, his deviance, and his personality to disturb us. Mrs. Hallet only needed her great hatred towards foreigners and towards Rynn to drive us to despair.

I found both of them to be excellent antagonists. They served their purpose.

IV. Mario

Mario is my favorite character, along with Rynn. From the very beginning, he is presented to us as an intelligent and charismatic boy who manages to bring out the more childish and humorous side of Rynn, a girl from whom we had barely seen a small smile.

From the beginning, Mario's intelligence is clear. He was able to deduce, just by looking at Mrs. Hallet's red car, that Rynn was hiding something. That little clue was more than enough for him to decide that he wanted to know and discover the secrets that Rynn kept inside her house.

Mario was not only a very intelligent boy, but he was also cunning and very perceptive. He had such a strong will that he could play along with Rynn, with whom he fell deeply in love.

Mario is my favorite character because he represents this deep love that would do anything for the one he loves. Despite being in love with Rynn, he is able to put that aside and think clearly when the situation calls for it. His magic tricks not only serve to make Rynn laugh but are also his most useful weapon.

Mario was a well-used character from the middle of the book onwards, but he started to fall off the wagon towards the end. Personally, I feel like there could have been better ways to remove him from Rynn's scenario the way Miglioriti did. As the book ends, Rynn becomes more and more alone, losing all the important connections she had—Gordon, Mario, and Miglioriti. The way Mario goes off the rails is through pneumonia. Maybe it makes sense that he would end up there given the overall scenario, but for some reason, him ending up in the hospital felt like a bit of a disjointed development.

Objectively, I think Mario could have been better used in the finale. And if I put my sense of objectivity aside, Mario is the best character, period.

V. Rynn Jacobs

Let's talk about Rynn, our protagonist. Rynn is a girl who was left living alone with her father in that house at the end of the lane, where she tries to live a serene and quiet life, but above all, a lonely one. From the beginning she has had no interest in having relationships with other people; she lives for and by herself, she does things by herself, she goes to the bank alone, to the hardware store alone, to the market alone…

At first, Rynn is cold and strategic. She thinks through each and every step with precision, even if it takes time to find solutions to the chaos she ends up in. She knows how to handle herself in a world full of adults who want to look down on her.

From the beginning you could already tell that things were not going well with Rynn, her situation, and her house. The event that occurs with Mrs. Hallet will end up confirming everything, and even then you are left wondering if Mrs. Hallet was just exaggerating or if the girl was really hiding something in the basement. Rynn, who almost never shares her thoughts with us, ends up creating an aura of suspense around her, a veil of perpetual uncertainty.

At first we mistrust this girl. Despite being the protagonist, we remain on the sidelines of the things that happen in her head and what happened in the past. We know nothing or very little about her, who she was, and her life beyond her daily routine from which we begin to make assumptions. Chaotic, cold, and ingenious, Rynn manages to captivate us with that brilliant brain of hers.

As the chapters go by and Rynn is forced to let Miglioriti and Mario into her life, the heart of this girl becomes weaker and weaker, to the point where she allows Mario to be part of this lonely world that she so desperately needed to maintain. But why would Rynn, being so calculating and strategic, let a policeman and a child enter this world of hers and her father's? I thought about this question for a while.

Let's start with Miglioriti. Miglioriti is a policeman, which means that Rynn's secret was in imminent danger if only this man was in the vicinity of her house. Despite this, she made a very clever, albeit risky, move: she allowed him to enter her house, as if she had nothing to hide, and offered him a cup of tea. I suppose that at first Rynn just wanted to make Miglioriti understand that there was nothing to fear, that her father was at work and that she was not alone. The shot was twofold, because Miglioriti turned out to be a suitable companion, the very thing she had been looking for for so long without realizing it. Rynn constantly looked down on those who were her age, thinking that they had nothing interesting to share with her, no important thoughts, no poetry, no literature, and no knowledge. Miglioriti was an older figure of authority who was able to see her for what she really was: a person, not just a child, as if her entire being depended only on an empty label on which all the older adults placed the word "ignorance."

Now, Mario. Mario the magician. Why would Rynn let him into her life in the intimate, personal way that she did? I could say there are several reasons, but I think the main one is this: Not only did Mario see her for who she really was, but in addition to being pleasant and somewhat intellectually challenging company, Mario was able to not ask questions and help her get Mrs. Hallet's car to a place where she couldn't be incriminated. By inviting him into her home and spending an afternoon with him, sharing thoughts and experiences, Rynn tried tooth and nail to defend the secret world she had kept in the basement, but Mario, shrewd and stubborn, continued to ask questions. Rynn knew that anything could happen if she opened the basement door and let Mario see the things she was capable of when fear and anger got the better of her, and she knew that if there were two in the basement, there could be three depending on his reaction. Still, she let him down. That was a leap of faith.

A leap of faith that came, in my opinion, from a great need in her to be able to trust someone, anyone, whoever. She wanted to know that she could trust someone, not be alone forever. At that moment when Mario came down, I could only imagine Rynn clinging to all her hopes as tightly as possible, afraid that he would slip from her hands and she would be forced to abandon that dream of not being alone, at least not that alone.

Now let's take a deeper look at why Rynn committed murder.

Rynn grew up under the tutelage of her father, a man who, we can assume, was very kind and gentle, for Rynn remembered him with a certain neutrality but also protected his words with decorum. Leslie Jacobs was a poet who passed on his passion for literature and knowledge to Rynn. Rynn's mother, we might say, was not to be trusted. The woman cared nothing for her daughter, and both she and her father knew it. Before her father went away, as far away as he could, in the face of his illness, he asked Rynn to promise that she would keep herself safe in this life, that she would never let others walk all over her, and that she would try to carry on no matter what.

Rynn took her father's words very seriously. Rynn saw no other way out than to poison her mother. We would think that it is an absurd thing to do, to kill someone! An action that would undoubtedly lead to the deprivation of your freedom, that freedom that you so sought. Rynn, however, and I want us to remember well, is still a child. When her mother came to the house to claim her as her own, Rynn would be 12 years old, and she was alone, without her father. The life that her father wanted her to maintain for as long as possible was threatened by a woman who had never been of any importance to her, nothing more than a woman who did not love her or care for her. As Rynn said, it is surprising how much information you find in a library; Rynn's brain was a library of knowledge, perhaps questionable.

Rynn eventually became fond of Miglioriti, fell in love with Mario, and they both left her at almost the same time. She was left alone again, just that this time she did care. This time it hurt her.

In the end we see the story repeat itself: Rynn alone, with someone at home who intends to stay there with her forever. Rynn alone, with no one to trust. Rynn and the buns.

Conclusion and Review

I consider this book a classic, one that everyone should read at least once in their life. The aura of mystery and suspense that the novel carries—especially in the first 6 chapters—makes you immerse yourself in its pages and in that engaging narrative. Laird Koenig, in my opinion, did a good job of establishing the tone of suspense throughout the book.

One aspect that I think could have been better executed is also found in the first 6 chapters. While it is not a heavy read, at first it feels like it moves very slowly. I don't think it is a problem, but rather an aspect to note. These first 6 chapters work wonderfully to feel the immersive environment that the author tried to create.

I think the characters are very well executed. Although I feel that Mario could have been developed better, all the characters fulfill their purpose. No character is superfluous or missing.

Now, as for the ending... I don't consider it to be a bad ending; maybe the way I try to describe it is that I expected more. I expected a lot more from the ending. I can't say that the ending is bad because it continues with the tone of the novel; it's an ending that isn't predictable, and also, it feels like a genuine consequence of Rynn's somewhat careless actions since she starts to fall in love with Mario. When I think about the muffins, I feel a little better knowing that Rynn is, after all, smarter than she seems. The ending seems adequate to me given the circumstances and the tone that the novel had been taking; I just expected more.

The relationship between Rynn and Mario captivated me. I can only imagine what would have happened if my 13-year-old self had read that: I would have exploded with love. While I don't think their relationship needed to be romanticized that much—at the end of the day, Rynn is a murderer, and Mario became her accomplice—I do understand the point of it: they both needed a safe place and found it in each other. Sometimes people who commit bad actions aren't necessarily bad.

Rynn is a killer. Throughout the book we grow fond of her and hope that her secret won't be discovered, even if we know it's wrong. I think part of that is because we know what kind of people the murdered people were, since we know what kind of people Rynn and Mario are.

Finally, I would like to say that the book does its job. It is very good; it kept me hooked page after page, making it difficult for me to put it down to go to class since I read it during my long 4-hour breaks right before my class started... And I can only say that the ending left me stunned.

★★★★☆

4/5

[zurgles]

Tarot Decks I Own (as of June 2024)

I got most of these (after the RWS) when I last quit smoking a couple years ago (think I made it five years) as a deal with myself - I could spend my cigarette budget on indie tarot decks. I started up again but it was a good incentive at the time.

I have also traded and given decks away so there are more that I’ve had and lost, but this is my current collection of 27 tarot decks (I’ll make a separate post for oracle and misc decks). I also tried to get these in a way that corresponded to the majors order to help limit my spending but it got pretty neurotic with swapping out deck positions and stuff so I’ve stopped worrying about that as much. It kinda helps me remember my collection though.

I put in parentheses the year I got them in, more or less. I added pictures and I'll update with links to other posts if I ever do deck reviews.

1. Shadowscapes (June 2014)

2. Universal Waite (2016-17?)

3. Numinous Tarot (Sept 2018)

4. Britt's Third Eye Tarot (Oct 2018)

5. Sakki-Sakki Tarot (Nov 2018)

6. Ophidia Rosa (~2020, trade)

7. Cosmic Tarot (2019, trade, trimmed)

8. Next World Tarot (Dec 2018)

9. Persephone Tarot (Dec 2018)

10. Fantastic Menagerie, 2020 reprint (2021)

11. Naturescapes Tarot (2020)

12. Thoth Tarot (May 2019, trimmed, rebacked)

13. Tarot of the Sweet Twilight (June 2019)

14. Spirit Keeper's Tarot, Vitruvian edition (June 2019)

15. Halloween Tarot (July 2019)

16. Medieval Scapini Tarot (July 2019) (bday gift - partner)

17. Tyldwick Tarot, first edition (August 2019)

18. Deviant Moon Tarot borderless (Nov 2022)

19. Golden Tarot of Klimt (Sept 2019)

20. Cult of Tarot (participated, gift from forum creator ❤️)(2020)

21. Tabula Mundi - Manus perfectus (2020)

22. Tarot of Magical Correspondences (2020)

23. Baba Studios Fairytale Tarot (Sept 2019, trade) (no guidebook)

24. Dust ii Onyx travel edition (June 2020)

25. Mine (doodlebob tarot) (March 2019)

26. Spirit Keeper’s Tarot, Revelations edition (2021, unopened)

27. Fantastic Medical Tarot (majors only deck, gift)

[sunnydaleherald]

The Sunnydale Herald Newsletter, Saturday, May 3

GILES: That symbol on the ring... I believe it's the rune for fidelity, but, uh, it doesn't connect with any of the sects that I've studied. BUFFY: What about this? On the inside. It's a sun and three stars. Haven't we seen that somewhere? GILES: Let me see. No, I-I don't think this, um, represents any... BUFFY: Wait, it's right here. Sun and three stars. Yuch, check these guys out. Told you it looked familiar. GILES: Oh, the Order of Aurelius. Yes, you're right. BUFFY: Ooo, two points for the Slayer, while the Watcher has yet to score!

~~BtVS 1x05 “Never Kill a Boy on the First Date”~~

[Drabbles & Short Fiction]

A Secret Held Close (Angelus/Spike, T) by xaeyrnofnbe

Secrets in Caritas (Angel/Spike, T) by enbeecastiel

Sunrise (Angel/Spike, T) by enbeecastiel

Identity Theft (Connor & Dawn & Buffy & Angel, G) by Greensword101

left a violent mark in the oak tree hollow (Xander & Willow, T) by NahaFlowers

It Could Be Springtime (Angel/Spike, G) by MadeInGold

Season 1 Fan-Fic Episode (ensemble, not rated) by telperion66

[Chaptered Fiction]

Shadowed Suspicion Chapter 373 (Jojo's Bizarre Adventure xover, T) by madimpossibledreamer

always gray, never simple, Chapter 2/? (Wesley/Lilah, M) by welcometocaritas

origin of species, Chapter 8/15 (Angel & Cordelia, T) by eagle_eyes

Cherry Teeth, Chapter 5/8 (Buffy/Spike, M) by Splitterregen

High on a hill, it calls to me, Chapter 1/3 (Giles/Jenny, M) by mabm121

Corrigendo Tabulam, Chapter 49/? (Willow/Tara, not rated) by lyrical_echoes

Buffy and the Slayer, Season 1, Chapter 5/12 (Buffy & Dawn, T) by SunnydaleSentinel

Heartless, Chapter 13/100 (Buffy/Angel, Buffy/Angelus, T) by LSquared1501

His Last Slayer, Chapter 2/4 (Buffy/Spike, T) by VoronaFiernan

Chasing the Light, Chapter 10/? (Angel/Lindsey, E) by CloudSeeker

One Girl in all the World, Chapter 17/? (Dawn & Buffybot & Spike, Willow/Tara, M) by wi11der

Something Red, Chapter 7/? (Faith & Willow, Willow/Tara, ensemble, not rated) by Little_Bites

[French language] Le test de grossesse, Chapter 4/6 (Buffy/Spike, G) by MissKitty28

She's my wife, Chapter 11/? (Spike/OC, Buffy/OC, M) by HannibalLecter29

so I'll be everywhere that you'll be, Chapter 3/? (Buffy/Spike, ensemble, E) by ForASecondThereWedWon

Once More, With Fangs, Chapter 4 (Buffy/Spike, Adult Only) by Cazzy

Fifty Shades of Spike, Chapter 1 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by Pyewacket

Have a Little Faith, Chapter 6 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by Melme1325

Animal I Have Become, Chapter 3 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by Melme1325

Can't Get No Satisfaction, Chapter 4 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by Melme1325

Unused Key, Chapter 4 (Dawn, Buffy, Willow, Charmed xover, FR15) by btvsforever

Risque Roommates, Chapter 13 (Buffy/Faith/Spike, Adults Only) by shithappens

Indecent Proposal, Chapter 30 (Buffy/William/Xander, Adults Only) by harrisxander2

[Images, Audio & Video]

Icons: tvmovie20in20 Round 16, BtVS (TV) 1-7 (ensemble, worksafe) by nondenomifan

Artwork: Post NFA alone time. He listen to her heart (Buffy/Spike, slightly NSFW) by isevery0nehereverystoned

Manip: Deviant & Willing (Angel/Spike, worksafe) by fatalfaeri

Gifset: BEST OF BTVS: Cordelia Chase — Season Two (worksafe) by clarkgriffon

Artwork: Completed drawing: You think we're dancing? (Buffy/Spike, worksafe) by glitterswitchcraft

Gifset: [Buffy/Angel S3 - Angel's return] (worksafe) by anjelia3

Artwork: thought I’d try my hand at some spike fanart (worksafe) by oh-so-eepy

Artwork: alternative ‘dark willow’ inspired by this post because…yeah, it would’ve been SO impactful for willow to just look like willow during her villain arc (depiction of blood, otherwise SFW) by mistyintherivers

Artwork: PLEASE DO NOT THE CAT (Buffy/Faith, worksafe) by incognitoduck11

Tattoo: Buffy tarot tattoo (worksafe) by twjg3

[Reviews & Recaps]

Rewatch: S1 E5 - Never Kill a Boy on the First Date by torturedspike

Mothman’s Buffy Rewatch, Season 5, episodes 8 and 10, “Shadow” and “Into the Woods” by mothmans-wedding-photographer

PODCAST: S5. Ep13. Why We Fight by Investigating Angel

[In Search Of]

ISO: [tillow fan artists] requested by pearlofthewoods

ISO: does anybody have any spangel or trans angel fic recs (non-explicit pretty please) from sites other than ao3? requested by xaeyrnofnbe

ISO: Where do people post BtVS fanfic? requested by ReadyParsley3482

[Community Announcements]

SAD’s June Event - WANDERLUST 2025 by SADmins

[Fandom Discussions]

[ask by earthenterran] Thoughts on Cordelia and Angel?? answered by explosionshark

Eliza Dushku’s physical acting as Faith is so good by fiercestpurpose

[About Dawn fining Tara's body] by femmedefandom

I get what they were trying to go for in the aesthetic of “Dark Willow” but my god it just seems so cheesy and performative looking by femmedefandom

What is the deal with Drusilla torturing Angel and wanting revenge when he’s actually a good person [...] but once he loses his soul (and is once again the cruel guy who destroyed her life), she’s buddies with him suddenly? by the-girl-from-another-time

xander and willow are both abused and neglected children by automatonwithautonomy

DAWN LITTLE SISTER OF ALL TIME???? she was literally created FOR buffy she only exists in Buffy’s life BECAUSE of her role as protector by sexcromancy

There’s no way Older and Far Away just happens directly after buffy beats the shit out of spike and verbally abuses him with no follow up by ironic-dysgraphia

What are songs in Buffy The Vampire Slayer and/or Angel that are mentioned, referenced, or briefly sung but are never actually played as part of the show's soundtrack? by Big-Restaurant-2766

Connor Had A Tear by RivenHyrule

what was Darla's role in Angelus's gang when they were terrorizing Europe back in the day by voldy1989

If you could rewrite the “Empty Places” episode, how would you do it? by Big-Restaurant-2766

why did Holtz never manage to destroy Angelus or Darla back in the day by voldy1989

Is it possible that Liam had learned to wield a sword before his death? by FoxIndependent4310

Oz's season 4 hideout/lockup/cage by GreyStagg

Foreshadowing Joyce? by SBscarlett-222

Unseen: The Long Way Home chapters 1-3 by CrunchyPeanutButt3rr

I found the Angel sign in Galway! by bridgetterobertson

What Buffy The Vampire Slayer dynamic is your least favorite and why? by Big-Restaurant-2766

[Articles, Interviews, and Other News]

Juliet Landau, Amber Benson, Julie Benz, Clare Kramer, Emma Caufield, Jonathan Woodward Exclusive... by Re-Vamped with Juliet Landau

CONVENTION: ICYMI James Marsters' Nightmare Weekend Chicago schedule by dontkillspike

Submit a link to be included in the newsletter!

Join the editor team :)

[ghnosis]

here is my entire Contextual Review document if you'd like it - warning it is 40 pages.

Abstract  

“’Tis the Night of the Witch: Supporting Difference within Dark Fan Communities”  

Though attractive due to its counter-cultural nature, heavy metal can be sonically “challenging” (noise metal, thrash), and/or ideologically challenging, featuring grotesque and misogynistic lyrics and prioritizing a cisgender, heterosexual, male gaze. In contrast, the Swedish contemporary metal band Ghost embraces the queer/female gaze through lyrics explicitly referencing female empowerment and overt gestures toward leftist progressive politics.  

This thesis explores queer fan readings of Ghost and the online community surrounding the band. Many Ghost fans go beyond passive listening - they create extensive fanfiction surrounding the story and world of Ghost, actively writing themselves into a Satanic clergy absent of real-world connections to church burning, fascism, or violence associated with some extreme forms of metal. This fanfiction is often explicitly sexual in nature, and is winkingly acknowledged and encouraged by Tobias Forge, the band’s founder. The Satanic Ministry depicted in queer Ghost fanfiction is a Carnivalesque, topsy-turvy world in which Satan is good, God is bad, and anything “deviant” is to be celebrated.  

The project will employ an autoethnographic approach, drawing on and adding to feminist literature on identity, sexuality, and conceptions of the self as subject. The thesis is supported by data drawn from one-on-one interviews with Ghost fans on the microblogging site Tumblr, as well as data drawn from Ghost fans’ posts on the same site. 

REST OF THE THING UNDER THE CUT

Introduction 
 

Research Question  

How do “deviant” fans read the band Ghost? 
 

Subquestion 1: How are Ghost fans different from other heavy metal fans? 

Subquestion 2: How does this queer fandom intersect with the broader subcultures and genres of metal?

Subquestion 3: How is the Ghost fandom community different from other fandom communities? 

Subquestion 4: How do queered Tumblr fan practices impact Ghost fan practices? 

Research Question: How do “deviant” fans read the band Ghost? What informs this reading? 

This research investigates the contemporary metal band Ghost’s fan community on the microblogging site Tumblr, and the ways in which band founder Tobias Forge acknowledges, supports, and encourages queer readings of his work. The thesis defines “deviance” via Gloria Anzaldúa: “[d]eviance is whatever is condemned by the community.” (Anzaldúa 2021: 75) Though heavy metal is sometimes a celebration of deviance, with lyrics celebrating horror, death, and the macabre, there is a limit to the types of deviance that are “allowed.” Queer fans are often sidelined or made invisible: academic writing on metal began in the early 1990s (Weinstein 2000, Walser, 1993), contemporaneous with much queer theory (Butler 1990) - however, it was not until 2015 that a monograph examining queerness in heavy metal (Clifford-Napoleone 2015) was published. 

In her monograph on the history of queerness and heavy metal, Amber Clifford-Napoleone questions the way Judas Priest is remembered in metal history in the wake of singer Rob Halford’s coming out in 1998 (29 years after the band was founded). Does a musician have to identify personally as queer to be “read” as queer by their fans? Tobias Forge has not made a practice of discussing his own sexuality and is in a committed “straight” relationship, but early participant interviews posit Papa Emeritus IV, the latest incarnation of his on-stage character, as queer. Unlike Halford’s direct adoption of leather as a winking nod to the queer leather community, Forge does not directly refer to queer community portrayals in his characterization of Papa Emeritus. What, then, leads to fans’ queer reading of the character? 

This thesis investigates Ghost’s anonymized performance, and its potential for a new kind of fandom. Band members’ identities were not revealed for the first eight years of Ghost's existence (2010-2018); frontman Papa Emeritus and his backing band of Nameless Ghouls wear masks and elaborate costumes on stage and conducted interviews in character. Early interviews implied that the band had been commissioned by Satan himself, and that the identities of the band members were irrelevant to this unholy message (slavghoul 2020). 

Though the Ghouls are referred to as “nameless” en masse, and wear nearly identical costumes onstage, fans give each musician a unique nickname and characterization. The Ghouls do not speak onstage or in interviews – their characterization is entirely developed based on onstage presence/body language and existing “fanon:” “a series of details and characteristics that are shared by most...[fanfiction] stories, but that have no factual basis in the original media text.” (Stasi 2006: 121, Kaplan 2006: 136). Fans develop fanon as a community; one fic writer may interpret onstage behavior as evidence that a Ghoul is queer, which then provides evidence for a second fic writer to interrogate and expand that interpretation. 

How are Ghost fans different from other heavy metal fans? 

Historically, the metal community has lionized a wide variety of societal deviants, including murderers, domestic abusers, and Nazis. Further, metal aesthetics borrow heavily from the specific deviance of 1970s gay culture - Rob Halford of Judas Priest famously co-opted the leatherman look for his stage persona (Clifford-Napoleone 2015: 36). But queer identity does not seem welcome in metal space. Sociologist Deena Weinstein, one of the first scholarly researchers of metal, refers to an “attitude of extreme intolerance” towards specifically gay male identity (2000: 105), though she is careful not to label the entire subculture homophobic. Robert Walser, writing in 1993, briefly explored the divide between glam metal and other subgenres, citing an interview with Anthrax drummer Charlie Benante identifying the use of keyboards in metal as “gay.” (Walser 1993: 130). Anthologies like Black Metal Rainbows, conferences like ISMMS 2023 (“No Outsides”) or monographs like Queerness in Heavy Metal Music problematize this exclusive inclusivity: where is the space within metal for those “condemned” (Anzaldúa 2021: 75) within both societal and metal community? Why denigrate queerness in a genre that elevates other societal ills? 

While “traditional” metal fans often focus on the musicians’ virtuosity and technical prowess, Ghost fans are interested in the imagined inner lives of the musicians, and the differing versions of masculinity on display within their performances. This ties Ghost fandom less to metal fan practice and more towards queerer and more “female” modes of engagement with media: namely, women’s writing relationships: fanfiction. This type of musical fandom can be tracked back to Elvis (Hinerman 1992, Wise 1986) or the Beatles (Ehrenreich, Hess, and Jacobs 1992). Boy bands of the early 2000s such as *NSYNC and Backstreet Boys inspired fanfiction (Busse 2005, 2016). Halberstam questions their allure – “at least part of the appeal of the Backstreet Boys depends on the production of seemingly safe and almost unreal masculinities... a safe alternative to the misogyny and mistreatment” of real-life relationships. (Halberstam 2005: 178). 

The fanfiction Ghost fans write most closely resembles “bandom:” fanfiction about emo bands like My Chemical Romance and Fall Out Boy.  Bandom provided a “safe space” for teenagers of the 2000s to explore ideas of sexuality (queer and straight) and dating with men they would never really date, men they felt would “understand” them because of the constructed self-images band members presented online (Hagen 2015), and the lyrical content of songs. Billie Joe Armstrong, Gerard Way and others of their pantheon discussed anti-anxiety prescriptions, progressive politics, loneliness, and queer sexuality openly (in a way that A-list celebrities of the early aughts did not), creating space for deviant fans who had given up on fitting in to fit into a new space. Similarly, the masculinities on display did not reflect the predominant sociopolitical climates of their times. 

Bandom, like most slash (fanfiction describing the imagined relationships between two male characters) arguably springs from lack of female representation in media:  “...there’s nobody but the two men... to justify the sexual display, so the concept of slash arises.” (Green, Jenkins, Jenkins, 1998: 17) Musical fandom, in this sense, is no different. Erotic fanfiction about Ghost appeared almost immediately on the microblogging site Tumblr. The band plainly acknowledged and encouraged this highly sexual reading of their work as early as 2012, when the now-defunct “Ghoulish Perversions” Tumblr was linked directly on the official Ghost Facebook page. (https://www.facebook.com/thebandghost/posts/297668790339417). Ideas of sex as currency in music are not new to Ghost (Fast 1999, Roach 2018, Wise 1990, Frith and McRobbie 1990), but the sexuality represented by Papa and the Ghouls suggests a more equal exchange than historical “cock rock” (Frith and McRobbie 1990: 319) implied. Ghost’s lyrics directly reference female sexual pleasure, Forge’s in-character banter as Papa Emeritus, and the onstage relationships between male Ghouls and female Ghouls (indeed, perhaps the inclusion of female musicians at all) invites a different reading of this male musician/female “groupie” dichotomy (Frith and McRobbie 1990, Vasan 2010, Fast 1999, Savigny and Sleight 2015).  

“There is a void in my guts that can only be filled by songs,” Jessica Hopper writes in her introduction to The First Collection of Criticism by a Living Female Rock Critic, (2021: xvi), then maligns the genre that spawned bandom in “Emo: Where the Girls Aren’t.” (ibid 257) Sonically heavy music with lyrics suggestive of teenage heartbreak and rage appeal to societal outsiders, but emo’s lyrics “proved this is a genre...made by and for boys.” (259) Emo is by no means the only genre to draw clear definitions of in- and out-groups; the 2017 collection Under My Thumb: Songs That Hate Women and the Women Who Love Them spans genre and music history, from doo-wop to Taylor Swift. Questions of gender exclusion often arise in metal studies; scholars like Rosemary Lucy Hill, Laina Dawes, Jasmine Hazel Shadrack,, and Sonia Vasan have made careers interrogating women’s participation in and engagement with metal. This thesis asks: Are Ghost fans, like media fans before them, using fanfiction to reclaim space within a genre that pushes deviance out? How is Ghost’s positive response to that fanfiction lending credence to queer readings? Centering the marginal, queer response to Ghost builds on feminist academic work on fanfiction and women’s participation in genre (Jenkins 2013, Busse and Hellekson 2006), filling a crucial gap: What does it mean for queer fans when the Satanic anti-pope onstage celebrates their queerness? What does it mean for young trans men to see a more relatable masculinity on display? Ghost is uniquely positioned to answer. 

How does this queer fandom intersect with the broader subcultures and genres of metal? 

Ghost faces “controversy regarding genre adherence” (Thomson 2021: 50) within the metal community. This is not in and of itself unusual; Robert Walser attempted to make sense of genre coherence in metal in 1993, using the band Rush as an example of metal-not-metal: Rush’s music “...meets the criteria of the definition of heavy metal held by most outsiders but fails the standards of most metal fans.” (1993: 7) Similarly, Ghost appears in publications that deal with hard rock and metal (Metal Hammer), routinely tours with bands that the metal community accepts and welcomes (Metallica, Amon Amarth), and plays metal-focused festivals (Hellfest). But detractors use words like “try-hard,” “corny as hell” and “thirsty” (Krovatin 2018) to describe the band, and even positive interviews sometimes question “whether Ghost belong in our world at all” (Alderslade 2019). This hostility raises several questions: Is Ghost’s primarily-female audience (slavghoul 2020) damning in a genre whose audience historically skews white, cisgender, and male (Walser 1993, Savigny and Sleight 2015, Vassan 2010, Dawes 2013)? Are the people who call Ghost “gay” (s_g 2022) simply following a tradition of linking anything of low social value to femininity and queer identity (Pascoe 2011, Halberstam 2005, Benshoff 2015)? A vocal subculture has sprung up on the social media site Tumblr who deliberately reads Ghost as queer in a positive light – a sort of metal “protest exegesis.” (Faxneld 2017: 12) It is this subculture, its participants, and related phenomena that this research explores. Through interviews with Ghost fans and autoethnographic exploration of the fan culture, I seek to understand which elements of Ghost’s backstory and stage performance read “queer (positive)” to queer fans. It is possible that Ghost is serving as a “gateway” to heavy music, a bridge between pop culture, Top 40, and extreme music, mirroring 2010s queer and female interest in pop punk. It is possible that Ghost fanfiction is a unique space of queer joy, a niche of rebellion in an otherwise hostile environment – a worthy rebellion in the contemporary era.  

Are genre-specific elements like Ghost’s lighter sound (analogous to pop punk versus “true” punk) making the band (and by extension, the genre) attractive to newcomers? Or are deviant fans attracted to Ghost’s Satanic stylings, critique of organized religion, and critique of Protestant/Catholic social mores? How does existing scholarly work on genre, gender, and metal (Vasan 2010, Hutcherson and Haenfler 2010) engage with these ideas? This research explores Ghost fans’ experiences in fandom space, seeking to understand queer contemporary subculture and queer readings of metal. What do queer Ghost fans like about Ghost, and why? What can this tell us about fostering and supporting queer joy in the 2020s? 

How is the Ghost fandom community different from other fandom communities? 

Fanfiction, fan art, costume, and roleplay are methods to “inhabit and explore” (Jenkins 2013: 19) the world of a beloved media property, expanding its “archive” - fan texts are situated within the world of the original text, yet stand apart.  The online environment allows fans a greater level of access to media creators (and vice versa) than ever before, with mixed results: situations like Anne Rice’s attempts to litigate against fanfiction writers speak to a troubled historical relationship between fan and creator, one in which there are “correct” and “incorrect” interpretations of a piece of media. When authors, showrunners, or film directors keep strict hold of their material, there is less room for fans to interpret media on an individual or community level. 

Most fanfiction can be separated into two modes: fanfiction about fictional media (i.e. Star Trek) or “real person/people fic (RPF):” fanfiction about living celebrities (Arrow 2013). These two modes do not often converge: while it was possible to meet Leonard Nimoy at a convention, Spock exists only in the imagination. While it may be morally “appropriate” to write about salacious adventures between two fictional characters, writing fanfiction about two living men, with real lives (and access to the internet) raises questions of parasociality. But Papa Emeritus is at once tangible and intangible: fans can purchase meet and greet packages to take photos with and speak to Papa, but Tobias Forge now conducts interviews out of character, sharing his own interpretations of Papa as a person outside of Forge. The thesis follows Roach (2018) in delineating RPF fandoms as an “independent” (168) area of academic study, apart from fictional media fanfic. The research queries the liminal position of Ghost fic as at once RPF and not-RPF: is Ghost attractive to fic writers because of this liminality? Musician Brian Warner performs under the stage name Marilyn Manson, but Brian Warner and Marilyn Manson are not portrayed as two distinct people the way Forge and Papa Emeritus are; the abuse allegations by five women against Warner/Manson are reflections on both “people.” While it is possible for Tobias Forge to commit a crime, Papa Emeritus exists in fleeting moments, usually onstage, and is therefore unlikely to behave poorly. Does this make him “safer” for modern fans to relate to? Further, each Ghost album introduces fans to a “new” Papa Emeritus. Each Papa is played by Forge, but each Papa has different characterization and personality. Does Papa’s shifting identity support a varied fan reading? How is Ghost fanfiction at once similar to and different from band fanfiction that came before, and what does this mean for fanfiction as genre? 

Why is Tumblr the social media of choice for queer Ghost fans? 

One aim of the research is to question the role Tumblr itself plays in queer Ghost fan self-expression. Tumblr scholars Katrin Tiidenberg, Natalie Ann Hendry, and Crystal Abadin describe Tumblr as a “silosocial” (2021: 12) platform; a platform on which users cloister themselves within specific shared interests – in this case, the band Ghost. Each silo holds its own “shared practices, vernacular, and sensibility” (13). Tumblr advertises itself as a “welcome back to weird,” (Tumblr iOS App Store) a “beautiful hellsite” (Tiidenberg et al. 2021: 210) on which new users can find “fandom, art, [and] chaos.” (Tumblr iOS App Store) Tumblr, unlike most other modern social media, is not linked to users’ legal names, and the site’s features “welcome multifaceted self-presentation" (Tiidenberg et al. 2021: 13): users can create any number of “side blogs,” separate spaces to discuss one fandom or area of interest. In the below image, three of my blogs are listed: my main/personal blog (which has been redacted), my primary side blog, Ghnosis, and a third side blog for video game content. All three blogs share the same following list, but have different lists of followers based on which users are interested in which content. Users choose blogs to follow based on content, not on the identity of the blogger. (Tiidenberg et al. 2021: 13) In this way, users interested in a queer reading of Ghost can easily locate and follow others interpreting Ghost through a queer lens. 

The research queries the role specifically Tumblr-style silos play in offering a carnivalesque reading of the band’s Satanic messaging. The definition of carnival and carnivalesque I employ derives from Mikhail Bakhtin, writing on Rabelais’ oeuvre. (Bakhtin 1984: 7-17) Carnival is “of the people” and is rooted in “folk humor.” ( ibid. 4) Tumblr, with its language of social justice and meta-humor (Tiidenberg et al. 2021) is a carnivalesque space in contemporary internet, where real-name or video (real-face) content reigns supreme. Bakhtin’s carnival is not merely an event to attend and watch; the people “live in it, and everyone participates because its very idea embraces all the people.” (Bakhtin 1984: 7) Ghost fans, by writing themselves communally into the Satanic clergy, choose to “live in” this world whose “very idea” makes room for them: Satan is good, God is bad, the deviant is a cause for celebration. Bakhtin further links Carnival to the Church and the Church calendar, as well as to “ancient pagan festivities” (ibid. 8) and the cycles of birth, death, and time. Ghost’s albums describe the rise and fall of civilizations and of Satan himself, while their short video “chapters” depict the rises and falls of previous Papas, up to and including their births and deaths. Bakhtin defines a “peculiar logic of the ‘inside out’... the ‘turnabout...’” (ibid. 11), a queer logic. “No dogma, no authoritarianism, no narrow-minded seriousness can coexist with Rabelaisian images...” (ibid, 3): the language of the carnival “mocks and insults the deity” (16) while dealing with the body, typically the belly or “lower stratum.” (18) Bakhtin argues that the folk humor of the carnival degrades: “lowering...all that is high, spiritual, ideal, abstract” to the “sphere of earth and body” (19). The carnival takes the highest element of medieval life (the Church) and lowers it to the earth, the belly, the bowels, and the sexual organs. So too can no dogma, authoritarianism, or seriousness coexist with Ghost’s silly Satanism, or Tobias Forge’s debasement of the Catholic Church in songs like “Idolatrine.” If fans are only “out” (as Ghost fans, as queer, etc.) on Tumblr, is this because Tumblr itself functions as carnivalesque space, a place to take one’s mask off, to revel in low culture?  

2b. Aims  

Investigate the social and creative values of Ghost Tumblr fan subculture using autoethnographic experience and textual/thematic analysis of Tumblr posts related to Ghost, as well as responses to semi-structured interviews with other Ghost fans.

Gain a deeper understanding of queer music fan identity by bringing together existing literature on queer identity/deviance (Anzaldúa 2021, hooks 2015, Benshoff 2015, Halberstam 2005), fanfiction (Busse 2005, 2006), and heavy metal fandom (Dawes 2013, Black Metal Rainbows, Vassan 2010, 2011).

2c. Objectives  

This research aims to view the band Ghost and the Tumblr community that has sprung up around them through a queer carnivalesque counter-reading, prioritizing deviant and “outsider” ideas of fan participation in heavy metal music. 

Feminist and gender studies explore the individual within the context of the social, investigating the marginalized without the frame of “wrongness” of the privileged. Peggy McIntosh, in her seminal 1990 text “White Privilege: Unpacking the Invisible Knapsack,” describes whites (privileged members of society) as thinking of themselves as “morally neutral, normative, and average, and also ideal.” (ibid. 2) Gloria Anzaldua, Cathy Cohen, Jack Halberstam, and Judith Butler equate queerness with deviance, an oppositional position: “’Queer’ also provokes different assumptions and expectations. In the ‘60s and ‘70s it meant one was from a working-class background, that one was not from society...there is still more flexibility in the ‘queer’ mold, more room to maneuver.” (Anzaldúa 1991: 252). The Ghost fan embodies that which American society defines as other, that which even other heavy metal fans deem inappropriate and incorrect (Clifford-Napoleone 2015: 381). The Tumblr Ghost fan declares, via Tumblr posts, their queerness, their deviance, their intense interest in sex with the band’s demonic creatures. Ghost fans’ deviance strays from black metal church burning and goregrind shock value; the carnivalesque spirit of queer joy marks their fandom as unique. Tobias Forge looks out on his audience and sees “wiggling” and “dancing,” not moshing or fighting. (slavghoul 2020) 

Harry M. Benshoff, defining queerness in relation to horror films, calls queer “what opposes the binary definitions and proscriptions of a patriarchal heterosexism... queerness disrupts narrative equilibrium and sets in motion a questioning of the status quo and... the nature of reality itself.” (Benshoff 2015: 119) This carnivalesque approach is also exemplified in Cathy J. Cohen’s idea of queer politics including even “heterosexuals on the (out)side of heteronormativity,” (Cohen 1997: 452). Queer does not necessarily have as much to do with sexuality as it does an “unruly, defiant, and angry” (Benshoff 2015: 119) form of activism, which encompasses not only same-sex relationships but also addresses “issues of race, gender, disability, and class.” (ibid.) Queer, deviant identity “revels in the discourse of the loathsome, the outcast...” (Sue Ellen Case, “Tracking the Vampire,” cited in Benshoff 2015: 119) Are queer Ghost fans using Tumblr as the only place in which they can perform this revelry safely? 

Deviant identity is not merely reserved for those who are “actually” homosexual – Benshoff draws a lineage between the late 19th-century homosexual Decadents (Benshoff 2015: 132-133) and the “ostracized high-school student and loner” (Benshoff 2015: 133) of 1970s and 80s films. (ibid) The Breakfast Club’s John Bender (played by Judd Nelson) is certainly no homosexual, but he is a “long-hair” who is feminized as he is ostracized, much the way Marilyn Manson, Gerard Way, or other such deliberate deviants are. Though the masculinity embodied by 1980s stoners or 2000s emo icons certainly differs from Halberstam’s boy bands, they raise questions of queered/deviant masculinities.  Do Ghost fans read Tobias Forge, as a leather-clad metalhead, as deviant in the same ways they are, despite his apparent straight sexual identity? Or are they linking Forge’s open respect for Satan as figure with homosexuality in a positive light, as Per Faxneld connects the Decadents directly with Satan? Is “queerness” really an attempt to categorize another “unreal masculinity?” 

To exist within a body deemed non-normal by society – a raced body, a fat body, a female body, a disabled body, a queer or trans body –  is to understand on some level that your body, your very existence, is up for public discussion and invites public commentary at any time. (Young 1990) Discomfort regarding trans or intersex bodies is discomfort with a body that is difficult to incorporate into societal roles (Fausto-Sterling 1994). Does Ghost facilitate a reclamation of the trans body, the disabled body, or the fat body as a site of pleasure for the person within that body? Does this play into carnivalesque rules of what is valuable or beautiful in society? 

2d. Gap in existing research, original contribution to knowledge 

Do public (via the internet, or via signs at concerts) expressions of deviant, explicit, queer sexual desire for Papa Emeritus or the Nameless Ghouls function as a publicly-staked claim in one’s own sexual pleasure? Is out-loud expression of a sexual appetite that cannot be satisfied through chaste heterosexual sex a form of “protest exegesis,” (Faxneld 2017: 12), a king-for-a-day dichotomy flip of decades of music in which the sexual power is in straight men’s hands? The Ghouls and Papa caress the microphone, their guitars, gesture seductively at the audience, continuing a lineage of musicians symbolically making love to the audience (Fast); but how is this performance read by the audience? How do Ghost fans feel about the band’s outspoken appreciation for queer and trans identity?  

The texts to be examined belong both to the fans (Tumblr discussion, fanfiction) and to the band (music videos, official merchandise, YouTube skits). When the subject of Ghost fanfiction comes up in interviews, Forge uses words like “fantastic” (s_g 2022) that the band belongs to the fans as well as to him, and the “text” of the band itself seems to adapt to incorporate this view. Forge noticed that his fans were more female-presenting than expected (slavghoul 2020, ghost-band-aids 2020), and that they had a ravenous appetite for Papa and the Ghouls. Over the decade the band has been performing rituals, the stage show has become more and more explicitly sexual, with the band members swapping robes and hoods for sculpted masks and tight pants, “put[ting] more emphasis on carnality.” (ghost-band-aids 2019) Each Papa is more explicitly sexual than the last, though he has always been a sexual figure – an interview with Metal Hammer UK from 2012 features Papa Emeritus I referring to himself as John Holmes, “the 13-inch-cocked porn star,” in a mix that also includes Hitler, the Pope, and Dracula (Doran 2012). 

Are Tumblr posts about Ghost only about Ghost? Is it possible that they rely on and refer to Tumblr “subculture” (Tiidenberg et al. 2021: 117-128) itself? Through years of belonging to this community, I have noted certain patterns appearing in fan works. Some posts are about queer identity, some are about religion, some are about a sense of community and belonging, some address neurodiversity. Through a combination of autoethnographic examinations of my experience in fandom as an ADHD/OCD/queer woman, as well as through a grounded theory framework (consisting of interviews and categorization of naturally-occurring data (Tumblr posts)), I will investigate these patterns. The research aims to bring to academia what Tumblr users have been saying for years – that there is something queer and neurodiverse about Ghost, and it is useful to explore when contextualizing modern ideas of deviance and belonging. 

Theoretical Contexts 

This thesis draws on an interdisciplinary body of scholarship to interrogate an under-examined area of contemporary subculture: queer Ghost fans. Existing work examines ideas of deviancy/belonging and its relationship to queerness (Anzaldúa 2021, 1991, Benshoff 2015, Butler 1990, Cohen 1997, Halberstam 2005), queer methods of “reading” traditional media (Benshoff 2015, Petrocelli 2023, Halberstam 2005) or questions what is meant by “community” in extreme music. (Dawes 2015, Riches 2015) This research uses all three areas to ask: why Ghost, why now? 

Contemporary Context: Metal Studies 

The work of metal studies scholars such as Jasmine Hazel Shadrack, Laina Dawes, Rosemary Lucy Hill and Sonia Vasan on gendered and raced participation in metal fandom forms one basis for this research. Metal studies’ intersections with religious studies (Metal and Religion Conference 2022, Unger 2019, Spracklen 2020) and specifically with Satanism (Thomson 2020, Swist 2019, Weinstein 1991) inform the culture in which Ghost exists. Amber Clifford-Napoleone's Queerness in Heavy Metal Music (2015) provides a queered history of the genre, including textual and subtextual analysis of the work of artists like Rob Halford (Judas Priest) and Joan Jett, and the “meanings” of their queered performances for fans. Robin Wood and Harry M. Benshoff’s work investigating queer readings of horror films and the monstrous homosexual lends support to my argument of heavy metal and queerness – an area Clifford-Napoleone did not broach in her text. Catherine Hoad investigated heavy metal fanfiction in a 2015 paper, but her research investigated RPF (real people fic), not character fic.  

Gloria Anzaldúa’s ideas of oppositional queer deviance and her work navigating “borderlands” forms a great deal of the vocabulary and specific definitions of queerness this work employs. Additionally, the work of queer and feminist theorists like Judith Butler, Audre Lorde, bell hooks, Monique Wittig, and Luce Irigaray help define ideas of queerness without biology. Ghost fans define their queer identity as revolt: J Halberstam’s arguments for “low culture,” Harry M. Benshoff’s idea of disruptive queerness, and Cathy J. Cohen’s idea that queerness is a “fundamental challenge to... heteronormativity” (1995: 445) help flesh out these conceptions of joyous queer rebellion. In this vein, Per Faxneld’s discussion of Satanic feminism, particularly his definitions of counter-readings, and Mikhail Bakhtin's conception of the Carnivalesque as a low-culture parody “pressure release” form my ideas of Ghost as queer and trans joy.  

Historical Context: Fanfiction Studies 

Fanfiction studies, particularly the work of Henry Jenkins, Abigail Derecho, and Mafalda Stasi form some of the “language” of fandom this thesis takes. Outside of fanfiction studies, Anzaldúa’s ideas of queer reading and writing lend themselves neatly to fanfiction, as does Trinh’s (1989), Cixous’ (1976), and Irigaray’s (1985) ideas of marginalized/women’s writing. Henry Jenkins provides a tidy religious link via the origins of the word fanatic (the genesis of the term ‘fan’): “certain excessive forms of religious belief and worship.” (2013: 12) This is particularly apt in the case of Ghost fans; Ghost’s Satanic stylings and framing of their concerts as “rituals” seem to bring the older religious definitions back to the fore. This is not unusual in metal: Walser's 1993 text Running with the Devil addresses mysticism and the occult in early metal, while witches and Satan remain popular figures in metal song titles and theming. This research seeks to understand the religious, carnivalesque element of Ghost fan identity, a conception of Ghost and of self that I have begun to define as a Ghnosis. This is a portmanteau of Ghost and of the concept of Gnostic knowledge, as informed by Hans Jonas: “knowledge of God,” (Jonas 1958: 34) or in this case, of Ghost. This Ghnosis mirrors the Gnostic idea of a more personal experience of God, unmitigated by an authority figure within the Church. Further, it mirrors William’s interpretation of the Gnostics as working to investigate multiple meanings and contradictory elements of Christian texts (Williams cited in Faxneld 2017: 11), and Halberstam’s conception of queerness as “consciously cultivated multidisciplinarity.” (Halberstam 2003: 363) 

Tobias Forge is clearly making some Ghost lore up as he goes along, leaving the problem of a linear narrative to the fans – and specifically, the theorist fans – to solve. How do fans piece the Ghnostic puzzle together, given vague and contradictory “canonical” information? What informs their reading of the Satanic Abbey and its inhabitants as queer or queer-friendly? Is it formed from individual interpretation of songs, concert footage, and concert experience? Do Ghost fans recognize themselves in the fic they write and read, or in some of the band’s cast of characters? Do they feel seen or known by Tobias Forge, or more likely, by Papa Emeritus? How do fans make sense of the seemingly random (and sometimes contradictory) “story” Forge is telling about Ghost? What is Ghnosis, and how are fans developing it?  

Theoretical Context: Carnivalesque queer Ghnosis 

The Gnostics were labeled as heretical because they opposed the structural power of the Church. If any given person could find their own personal version of God, what use would most people have for religious officials? Per Faxneld argues that Satanic feminism is a “protest exegesis,” (Faxneld 2017: 11) a counter reading of common Christian mythology. Faxneld follows Kurt Rudolph, who traces this idea to the Gnostics. I read both Faxneld and Bakhtin, as well as Ghost fans themselves, through Jonas’ and Pagels’ ideas of Gnostic thought, and through a queer lens. Ian Barnard, writing on the work of Gloria Anzaldúa, articulates the ways she plays with language to “inver[t]... hierarchies (from queer/mestiza = degenerate to queer/mestiza = transcendent:” (Barnard 1997: 39) this is the way in which Ghost fans use the word “queer.” Queer is not a slur; it is a transcendent, freeing space. Anzaldúa writes of borderlands: physical, psychological, sexual, spiritual. For Anzaldúa, “the Borderlands are physically present wherever two or more cultures edge each other..” (Anzaldúa cited in Barnard 1997: 39). The Ghnostic space, the Ghost Tumblr space, is such a borderland. Ghost fans bring together those raised on AC/DC and those who found sanctuary in musical theater, those who reject Christian teachings of taboo by deliberately celebrating them. The carnivalesque relates to the body, specifically the lower stratum, in opposition to holy sacredness. It revels in the taboo and the low culture. Carnivalesque space allows laughter; at the world, at prescribed doctrines, at those in power, forming a “pressure release” for an “oppressed, frightened, bound” community (1984, p.95). “In hell, Harlequin turns somersaults, leaps & skips, sticks out his tongue, and makes Charon & Pluto laugh.” Like queerness, the Bakhtinian grotesque “present[s] a contradictory and double-faced fullness of life.” (62) Carnival space is a pressure release. Ghnosis means being in on the joke. Metal detractors call Ghost’s music “gay,” mock the band’s use of corpse-paint-like makeup without obeying sonic rules of black metal, but Ghost fans recognize the topsy-turvy playfulness of the act. Bakhtin reiterates that the carnivalesque is “of the people” (141-160) - Ghost is not metal for metalheads, they are metal for queer weirdos. 

Bakhtin describes the carnivalesque as a “...brilliant parody of the medieval doctrine of faith, as well as of the methods of defending and teaching it: through quotations from the Scriptures, intimidation, threats, and accusations of heresy.” (227) Ghost parodies the Church in a similar manner; songs like “Con Clavi Con Dio” or “Year Zero” deliberately play on common Christian/Catholic prayers or liturgies, making them silly and demonic. Early interactions between Ghost/Tobias Forge and fans play on ideas of the threat of hell: early MySpace posts from the band were signed with variations on “burn in hell.” For those raised in the Church and who experienced it as punitive, Ghost’s lyrics offer a different kind of inverse salvation.  

Ghost’s music and album imagery (drawn by Polish artist Zbigniew M. Bielak with direct and extensive input from Tobias Forge) plays on the carnivalesque lower strata. Infestissumam’s album art features a Satanic pope leering over a child in utero, “a daughter to fall for a son.” Prequelle, the beginning of the story of Cardinal Copia, seems to flirt with Bakhtin’s ideas on the carnivalesque mouth: the cover (figure A, below) prominently features the gaping mouths of rats, themselves denizens of the “lower stratum” of society. From out of these gaping rodent mouths came Cardinal Copia (figure B), an “amusing and comic protagonist” in the Ghost canon. Unlike previous Papa(s) Emeritus, Copia (at the time of his debut) was not a full anti-pope. He is considerably sillier than previous Papas, depicted riding a tricycle through the halls of the Satanic abbey, performing balletic leaps, or spending time in his bedroom drinking juice boxes. Copia is an underdog, a nepotistic farcical mama’s boy. 

Methodology 

This thesis employs a feminist autoethnographic research design, drawing on models of enquiry developed within cultural and media studies. The core of the research is based in grounded theory ethnographic methods – grounded theory asks “What’s happening here?” (Glaser cited in Charmaz 2006: 20) Radical feminist work can only be achieved when it is done as a collective; when the margins are examined and moved towards the center, when it reframes the conversation to prioritize the lens of the excluded. My interest is to elevate the voices of those often maligned in heavy metal culture – the queer, the deviant – and prioritize their reading of Ghost. By examining my own experiences and those of the Ghost fans I interview, I am able to cross-reference my results and my own perspective, giving priority to the phenomenon (Charmaz 2006: 22) of Ghost fans themselves and letting the data collected lead the work. Ghost fans will help tell me “what’s happening here,” and the literature review places it within the academic conversation. This research is iterative and cyclical; as a grounded theory project, it returns to the data repeatedly to search for emerging themes. The narratives formed by the data guide the shape of the research; each one-hour interview I conduct is primarily a narrative of the Ghost fan’s experiences in life that led them to Ghost. Tumblr as a social media is based on narrative; users’ posts, small snippets of their lives or opinions, act as naturally-occurring data. Posts are artifacts, archival records, and written private records, which I will analyze narratively and thematically. By reblogging a post, I add it to my own archive while simultaneously spreading news or information to my followers (Tiidenberg et al. 2021: 116), establishing rapport with the rest of the community.  

 Data collection strategies function similarly to “natural” use of Tumblr as a social media. Users have two main functions upon viewing a post: “liking” it saves it to a hidden personal list of likes, while “reblogging” it allows users to add commentary, shares the post with a new group of followers, and creates a new web link to that post. Upon reblogging a post, users can add further narrative to the post, or classify the post under a “tag” (“user-generated, but machine-readable descriptive labels” (Tiidenberg et al. 2020: 27)). These tags are “uniquely multifunctional” (ibid): in my case, they are used for community outreach (tagging a post “#the band ghost” adds it to Tumblr’s collection of posts under that tag, possibly sharing my post with more people as well as providing a broad categorical framework for my research findings (via tags like #dissrelated, #fanart, or #tourvideos.)) The act of deliberate tagging transforms what would be casual scrolling into research: initial, thoughtful, coding and categorizing. There are three general categories of tags I use when coding a post: 

“Community” tags: tags that the Tumblr Ghost community uses. These expose my blog to more Ghost fans and help categorize otherwise miscellaneous posts (ex. #thebandghost, #shitghosting) 

Descriptive tags: tags describing what the post refers to (ex. #ghoulettes, #copia).  

Content tags: what form does the content in this post take? (ex. #tourvideos, #tourgifs, #fanart, #headcanons)  

“Research” tags: Posts that refer primarily to my research (conference appearances or publications, field notes, diaries). Posts like these help me hash out ideas while keeping myself and my research transparent to the Ghost community I am a part of. (ex. #dissrelated, #getting a PhD in Ghost) 

Tags shift and change as themes emerge in the research. Perhaps, as I talk to fans, post content (fan art versus tour videos) may not matter as much as the themes in the art (what are the tour videos depicting? Why is that a significant moment for fans?). I will return to tags periodically to assess their continued use. 

In the above image, the green arrow indicates that the post was reblogged from another blog (username redacted). The blue arrow indicates the first text added to the post (often the original poster’s narrative). The purple arrow indicates additional commentary added when another user reblogged the content. The orange arrows are my personal tags, coding these images under “terzo” (fan slang for the third Papa Emeritus, here an example of in vivo coding (Charmaz 2006: 55)). In vivo codes, per Charmaz, are “symbolic markers of participants’ speech and meanings.” (ibid). Fans use nicknames like Terzo to distinguish each Papa Emeritus from his predecessors and specify each Nameless Ghoul. Preserving the character names rather than the musicians seems, from early interviews, to create a dividing line between “actor” and character. In vivo coding often takes place during the interview – in order to understand participants in their own words, I need them to define concepts like “edgy” or “theatrical.”  

In keeping with grounded theory methods, I revisit my data frequently, re-examining it and the chosen tags/codes. I conduct 10 interviews per month, usually clustered towards the beginning of the month. I then move to initial, line-by-line coding of the interview transcripts. Charmaz calls line-by-line coding an “early corrective” (ibid 51) in grounded theory: paying close attention to line-by-line coding “forces [the researcher] to look at the data anew,” without tying participants’ ideas to the literature or forcing data into a preconceived idea. Initial coding also prepares me to adjust my interview strategy or return to previous interview participants for clarification, focusing the inquiry. 

This research takes an iterative, exploratory approach to data, following grounded theory guidelines for “probing beneath the surface and digging into the scene.” (ibid. 23) As more interviews are conducted, more categories, codes, and subcategories may emerge. Returning to data repeatedly throughout the process helps create rich, “thick” data (Geertz 1973 cited in Charmaz 2006: 14): conclusions arrived at through the research will be formed from my own field notes, interview participants’ personal accounts, and extant data: memes/narratives found by scrolling Tumblr. “Thickening” data requires working towards a “detailed and dense description” (Latzko-Toth, Bonneau and Millette 2017: 201) of participants’ experiences of the Ghost fandom: “What rewards do various actors gain from their participation?” (Charmaz and Mitchell 2001: 163) Why might Papa Emeritus III come across my Tumblr dashboard more times than other Papas? Are fans talking about Terzo in interviews? How? How do the posts I reblog and the ways fans talk about Terzo relate? What can we learn from these fan discussions? 

Data and data gathering strategies  

I exist at multiple places on the participant-observer spectrum with each post. My own writing, my own fan art, and my sincere, excited responses to fandom “events” place me as a complete participant in the subculture. Other decisions I make, such as the decision to order a hand-sewn Ghost plush from a fan in Italy, place me in the role of participant-as-observer: the plush is a tangible example of my research, as well as a tangible example of fans’ devotion (someone wrote a sewing pattern, sewed plush, and sewed them of a sufficient quality to sell them for $30 USD). My blog also functions as advertisement for and information on my research: potential interview participants can scroll my blog and get a sense of “me:” what university I study with, what conferences I may attend, or snippets of my academic writing. I continually revise and update my posts asking for participants; the more interviews I conduct, the more I develop an idea of what Ghost fans need to hear in order to feel safe, as well as what information might be extraneous for them. Interview participants share my blog with their friends, potentially garnering new interviews for me and new perspectives on Ghost and queerness. 

Tumblr has a feature called "Asks,” through which users can (anonymously or otherwise) submit questions to bloggers. This feature allows me to exist fully as a researcher without requiring a potential participant to reveal their identity, as in the below example.  

When I am conducting interviews, the grounded theory focus may sometimes position me more towards compete observer: sometimes, participants may refer to ideas I understand as a Ghost fan, but in the interest of not speaking for Ghost fans, or not making speculative assumptions, I need to ask clarifying questions that place me somewhat outside of fan space. In the following interview excerpt, I ask a participant to explain what is meant by “Swiss Ghoul is good to the ladies.” Having seen Ghost live, as well as being immersed in the Ghost milieu, I can assume that the participant is referring to the way Swiss Ghoul interacts sweetly with the Ghoulettes. Asking for clarification feels a bit awkward, as though it is removing me from Ghost fandom. As I conduct more interviews, framing clarifying questions without removing myself from the fandom space becomes easier. 

NG19: Swiss first grew on me when I saw how he treated Aurora on stage! Aside from his antics it felt comforting to see how good he was to the ladies, again connected to my upbringing and the women around me not typically being treated well.  RJ: what does it mean to be good to the ladies?  NG19: He always has great chemistry with them on stage. I like how sweet and playful he is with them, given that female band members can be overlooked and ignored so often. I also liked the moments where he'd kneel down for her. It's unusual and exciting to see a woman shown that kind of respect and attention. 

During the interviews themselves, I move across the participant/observer spectrum. Some participants use a style of syntax that is more formal than is typical of Tumblr; they sometimes refer to the highest degree of education they’ve completed. Ghost fans interviewed to date seem extremely interested in being “helpful” to me, or making sure they are providing good data. Getting them to relax, to speak to me as just another Ghost fan, is a balancing act. In vivo codes formalize this process. 

Qualitative Interviewing 

My call for interviews asks for “queer Ghost fans” as a starting point. By advertising via tags like #thebandghost, I am seeking specifically fans who have a “hyperfixation” on this band. It takes a specific sort of fan to care enough about a property to create a sewing pattern for a plush toy. It takes a specific sort of fan community to care enough to purchase such a plush toy. Who are these devoted Ghost fans? Some content I reblog (such as the painting of Copia showing his top-surgery scars to the ghouls, itself a reference to Caravaggio’s The Incredulity of Saint Thomas (1601-1602)) is aesthetically pleasing, but also refers to my research: is there something worth investigating from a religious and queer perspective in the Ghost fandom? Is this type of art a one-off, or is it emblematic of a wider pattern?   

What forms does this research take? How does the research fit into the community of Tumblr? Is it disruptive? How do you balance existing within and without the Ghost community?  

“Data are produced from social interactions and are therefore constructions or interpretations... the significance of data depends on how material fits into the architecture of corroborating data.... In other words, qualitative data and information are always already interpretations made by participants as they answer questions or by researchers as they write up their observations. Neither research participants nor researchers can be neutral, because... they are always positioned culturally, historically, and theoretically.” (Freeman, de Marrais, Preissle, Roulston, and St. Pierre 2007: 27 cited in Teddlie & Tashakkori)  

Interviews begin with a question about identity markers (chosen by the participant, with clarification from the researcher if requested) and inviting participants to tell me about how they found Ghost. Questions dealing with thematic content (fanfiction, queer readings, the concert experience, perceptions of “heavy” music) stem from the conversation. A conversational, informal tone is more important to me than rigidly standardized responses; follow-up questions depend on the direction the participant takes the conversation. Ghost fans frequently self-identify as autistic or anxious; making them comfortable to share with me is paramount. 
Each time I conduct an interview, I finish by asking the participant to share my blog/my call for interviews with their followers, expanding my reach. Word-of-mouth (snowball sampling) is the primary way I gain new interview participants; the success of my research quite literally depends on the trust and rapport I earn from other Ghost fans. All interview participants are homogenous (they are all Ghost fans active on Tumblr). Pilot interviews included non-Tumblr Ghost fans and the data produced more noise/less consistent results. I attempt to place more emphasis on following the data than looking for “ideal” participants – I used words like “women” at the beginning of the research and quickly found that although many participants were assigned female at birth, they no longer identify as women. By keeping my parameters fairly open, I can continue to follow emergent trends I find through interviews, rather than assuming I know where the data will take me. Is being assigned female at birth part of the socialization process that leads one to be a devoted Ghost fan? Or will other, more important elements emerge as I continue to conduct interviews and return to the transcripts to categorize and code? 

Interviews are text-based.  While I may be missing some data by using this method (body language, tone, use of filler words), text-based interviewing allows me to perform more interviews (transcription is done for me, I can easily keyword search across transcripts), perform in vivo coding as the interview participant is typing a response to the next question, and allows me to, crucially, make Ghost fans comfortable. Tumblr is a heavily textual social media site; this is how Ghost fans are used to communicating. Text-based interviews also allow participants more anonymity. The only personal information I collect is an email address, solely for communication; I have no way of connecting information shared back to the individuals involved. Participants do not need to worry about the way their voice sounds, or their pronunciation in English. My participants can safely continue to occupy positions of liminality: “out online, closeted in real life.” In copying and pasting the text of the interview from Tumblr to a Word document, I conduct initial coding on the interviews, quickly skimming for emerging themes, and giving agency to the participants. Some participants choose to provide additional context or correct their typos in the transcript after the interview has concluded. As new themes emerge, I return to older interviews to re-code and re-examine the data. Trends in data move forward and backward in significance as they are reiterated or ignored in subsequent interviews. 

Autoethnography: diaries, field notes, analyses, theory applications 

An autoethnographic approach based in grounded theory methods makes my research largely feel “natural” to casual use of Tumblr, and helps me center my research in Ghost fandom and the cultural experience of each new Ghost fan I talk to. My observations are largely nonreactive and covert: If a user notices that my blog (titled ghnosis) reblogs their post, they will not necessarily navigate to my blog to look at it or see it as out of the ordinary. The name relates to Ghost, as most Ghost blogs do – many flavors of “ghoulette,” “ghoul,” or “sister of sin” appear in Ghost-related blog titles. If a user chooses to navigate to my blog, they will see my pinned post and recognize that I’m a researcher. The act of reblogging posts is a part of the Tumblr ecosystem, so even though it’s ostensibly a direct interaction, it’s well within the way the site works. Most posts exist to be reblogged. 
 

In general, I try to follow unspoken Tumblr rules – using descriptive tags rather than adding textual content directly to a reblog, not reblogging personal posts, keeping my Ghost blog focused on Ghost and relegating more “personal” content (including, usually, selfies) to a separate blog. The functions of Tumblr (adding narrative/field notes to a post, tagging/categorizing/coding) are complements to grounded theory practices, and joining the two makes my research much less disruptive to the Tumblr Ghost community. Reflexive journaling on myself as researcher (biases, methodological decisions, the PhD process in general) functions both as field notes and journal, but is also a transparent effort to build trust and rapport with the rest of the Ghost community. Interview participants will sometimes ask to be kept in the loop on my research process – they recognize that academic work has a much longer turnaround time than other online forms of writing, but they are excited by the idea that someone is writing their thesis on Ghost and are excited to be a part of that work. Some interview participants send links to posts related to neurodiversity/queer identity and Ghost fandom, or fan art they think I might be interested in. Sharing milestone achievements (such as passing ethics review or conference panels), “aha” moments, or preliminary data (the below example is tongue-in-cheek, though others are more serious) keeps interview participants informed on my work, and may help others feel comfortable conducting an interview with me. In the below screenshot, a user who conducted an early interview with me (and remains one of the strongest supporters of my work) responds to point 2 of my post.  

In the below diagram, the white circle with the black dot inside represents my original post asking for interview participants. Each black dot represents a reblog. As participants reblog my post, it moves further away from my direct circle (at time of writing, I have 171 followers), pushing the post outside of my followers to new groups of Ghost fans. Healthy rapport with previous interview participants makes my research more successful in that it literally spreads my call for participants to new Tumblr silos. 

Ethics and risk  

Engaging with autoethnography brings to bear my own experiences, though where necessary I will follow Choi’s ethical concerns with regard to her own autoethnography, cross-referencing my recollections through participant interviews and ensuring I have permission to share anecdotes or stories that are not my own, or where they intersect with my own. I have examined Tumblr’s Terms of Service, Community Guidelines, and Privacy Policy, and do not believe my research will violate these, nor will it violate meta-Tumblr notions of privacy and the sanctity of Tumblr space. Casey Fiesler (2019, 2016) has produced a great deal of writing on feminist ethics and online communities for academics, and Tiidenberg et al’s text on Tumblr itself (2021) is a wealth of information on sharing Tumblr content without violating users’ privacy or sense of Tumblr as protective, liminal space. Katrin Tiidenberg has produced ethics guidelines for the Association of Internet Researchers (AoIR) as well as an individual article (‘Research Ethics, Vulnerability and Trust on the Internet’ 2018) to found my understanding of an internet ethics of care. I am committed to ensuring the protection of a community I consider my own. Viviane Namaste’s “Guiding Principles for Critical Feminist Social Theory” (part of her piece ‘Undoing Theory,' 2009) are crucial to me when examining lenses that are beyond my experience. Namaste posits three areas of specific focus for theory when it relates to “everyday women [and]… their lives” (ibid 27): relevance, equity in partnership, and ownership.  

Although Tumblr users are open about their experiences of queer identity, neurodiversity, and other “protected characteristics,” and certainly have a sense of privacy on a maligned and “forgotten” social network, I am not interested in connecting specific sentiments to specific usernames. I am interested in giving credit and attribution to Tumblr users when they are interested in being attributed. Throughout the course of my research, I will, to the best of my ability, work with the Tumblr community to define us in our own words. My primary goal is to ensure that “the knowledge produced will be useful to the people and communities” (Namaste 2009) that I am studying; as a member of the Ghost fandom, and as someone seeking active participation from the rest of the community, I am writing as much for them as for myself.  

My ethical duty to the Ghost community is to attribute intellectual property where it was necessary and wanted by the original posters and to ensure that everyone knows, to the extent possible, what I am doing as a researcher, why, and how it might impact the community. I give back to this community by helping place various Ghost lyrics and lore within the wider occult/esoteric community, and I write and share my own Ghost fanfiction on the same blog I use to ask for research help. I am a member of this community, I am not ashamed of kink or the fic I write, and it is not my intent to shame or make a spectacle of anyone else’s fic.  

As of 6 April 2023, this project has received RIEC ethics approval.  

As of 4 October 2023, this project has received RIEC ethics approval on revisions.  

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[pedanticpunk]

☢️ Modern Era (Peak Ruination)

Dune (2021)

Stellan - as Baron "I will have you, on a desert planet, worship a giant meatball for 166 minutes, and you will not question it." – Skarsgård

Era: Post-Thor ("Daddy has mouths to feed and sons to raise"), Pre-Dune 2 ("...and more sons to raise"). Peak Stellan? Objectively yes.

Ruin Method: Makes Butler method-act like Bill for months just to ghost his calls. "Sorry Austin, the Baron only takes communiques via spice-induced vision."

Odette's Verdict: "LOTR is better". ---

Film: 8.7/10

Skarsgård Impact: 7.8/10 ★★★★☆ ("Stellan devours scenery like the Baron devours… everything.")

PSSP: 68% (Stable)

Harkonnen Hospitality Rating: "1/5 stars. No towels, only betrayal. Would not get murdered here again."

Succession (2021)

Alexander - as Lukas "What if I was a tech bro with a God complex, a p*ss fetish, and the worst texting habits known to man?" - Skarsgård

Era: Post-The Northman muscle, pre-Infinity Pool meltdown.

Ruin Method: I will eyef*ck you into giving me your entire family empire.

Odette's Verdict: Not enough therapy in the world. ---

Series: 9.5/10

Skarsgård Impact: 9.4/10 ★★★★☆ (Points for power moves, deducted for oversharing.)

PSSP: 19% (Catastrophic Collapse)

Would I let him buy my company? I don't think I would know what is happening before it's too late. Would I let him send me weird DMs at 3 AM? Unfortunately, yes.

Eternals (2021)

Bill - as Kro "I couldn’t help but wonder... what if the real eternal love story was a Deviant licking your face for 7,000 years and still getting ghosted?"– Skarsgård

Era: Post-It Chapter 2 (post-clowning), Pre-John Wick 4 (pre-waistcoat villainy). Dad did Marvel, why not me too? Peak Bill? Debatable.

Ruin Method: Slides into your DMs with "we’re the same, you and I" after you tweet a single sad meme. Blocks you before sunrise.

Odette's Verdict: "Bill was in it? When?" ---

Film: 6.5/10 (5.9 if you watch it during a Marvel burn-out)

Skarsgård Impact: 7.2/10 ★★★☆☆ (The man can monologue for 20 minutes of screentime and you still think it's the best thing at the cinemas that week")

PSSP: 61% (Stable)

Insert jokes about the Skarsgård thirst being eternal *here*

The Northman (2022)

Alexander - as Amleth "I couldn’t help but wonder… what if the real Viking fantasy was screaming into a fjord naked while your abs do 90% of the acting?"– aka a feral himbo with a PhD in daddy issues – Skarsgård

Era: Post-Big Little Lies (post-suburban rage), Pre-Infinity Pool (pre-rich-people rot). Peak Alex? Objectively yes.

Ruin Method: Convinces you to raid a village for "honor," then ditches you to monologue at a volcano.

Odette's Verdict: Swedish man playing the Northman, the bar is low here. ---

Film: 7.8/10

Skarsgård Impact: 9.7/10 ★★★★☆ (The man grunted his way to an Oscar snub.)

PSSP: 15% (Catastrophic Collapse)

Viking AirBNB Review: ★☆☆☆☆ - No hot tub, just blood eagles. Host left me for a ‘prophecy.’ Would raid again.

Barbarian (2022)

Bill - as Keith "I couldn’t help but wonder… what if the real horror isn’t in the basement, but in trusting a man who seems too perfect?" aka hot guy mumbles his way through offering you a glass of wine while you're rambling about your favorite film - Skarsgård

Era: Post-Clark, Pre-Boy Kills World. Was it the best Bill? No.

Ruin Method: Ghosts you after getting your Hooker/Canned heat LP. You’d still defend him.

Odette's Verdict: "Awww, he actually looks nice here for once." ---

Film: 6.2/10

Skarsgård Impact: 8/10 ★★★★☆ (He weaponized awkward eye contact.)

PSSP: 42% (Critical Condition)

Detroit Airbnb Review: ★☆☆☆☆ - The host left me one bottle of water and 37 hidden tunnels. I would not survive again.

Infinity Pool (2023)

Alexander - as James "What if I was a rich failson with a humiliation kink, and Mia Goth made sure you’d never look at me the same way again?" - Skarsgård

Era: Post-Northman brute, Succession was still a thing (perhaps James in alternate timeline?). Best Alex? No. Hottest Trainwreck? Yes.

Ruin Method: I will make you question your morals and your attraction to me.

Odette's Verdict: Why is he barking? ---

Film: 6.3

Skarsgård Impact: 9.2/10 ★★★★☆ (Points for commitment, deducted for feral degradation kink on main.)

PSSP: 11% (Catastrophic Collapse)

Resort Review: ★☆☆☆☆ - ‘All-inclusive’ meant all my dignity. James cried in my lap after I said ‘no.’ 10/10 would ruin again.

John Wick: Chapter 4 (2023)

Bill - as the Marquis "I couldn’t help but wonder... what if the real High Table power move was to not blink while ordering a man's death in a €5000 waistcoat?" - Skarsgård

Era: Post-Clark, Pre-Boy Kills World (pre-screaming). Is this Peak Bill? Oui.

Ruin Method: He ghosts you after making you book his same-day Michelin-starred revenge dinner. You’d still Venmo him for the wine.

Odette's Verdict: "He looks like he has a B2B SaaS startup that never got picked up." ---

Film: 7.1/10 (It's a JW film, what do you want from it?)

Skarsgård Impact: 8.8/10 ★★★★☆ ("The man delivers his French like it’s a threat. And it is.")

PSSP: 33% (Critical Condition)

Yelp Review: "The host promised ‘a night of elegance.’ I arrived to find 37 corpses and a non-refundable tasting menu. The Marquis called this ‘ambiance.’"

Oppenheimer (2023)

Gustaf - as Hans "I am here for the awards because I can act like Dad on the big screenz." - Skarsgård

Era: Post-Vikings typecasting purgatory, pre-???. Still suffering from success like DJ Khaled.

Ruin Method: I will make you take me seriously, whether you like it or not.

Odette's Verdict: "Awww, he looks like a divorced math teacher." ---

Film: 9.3/10

Skarsgård Impact: 8.7/10 ★★★★☆ (Points for range, deducted for lack of hair.)

PSSP: 82% (Minimal Threat)

Would Trust This Man With Nuclear Secrets? No. Would Let Him Mansplain Physics? Maybe.

Boy Kills World (2023)

Bill - as Boy "I will have you, a white woman, yell boy for 111 minutes and you will not question it" - Skarsgård

Era: Post-John Wick 4, Pre-The Crow (aka "If I have to get shredded, I'll try to do a franchise.")

Ruin method: I will have you defend the poorly executed fighting scenes.

Odette's Verdict: Why are we not watching the Raid? ---

Film: 7.2

Skarsgård Impact: 8.4/10

PSSP: 58% (Stable)

The action isn’t poorly executed - it’s authentically exhausted. You try doing 47 takes of a hallway fight sequence after three months of keto.

Dune: Part Two (2024)

Stellan - as Baron "I will have you, a desert messiah, worship my nephew’s corpse for 165 minutes, and you will not question it (aka floating through the plot like a rancid birthday balloon)." – Skarsgård

Era: Post-Dune 1 (already greased up), Pre-Mamma Mia 3 (MERYL SAY YES AND MY LIFE IS YOURS).

Ruin Method: Forces Butler to actually drink the Baron’s bathwater for "authenticity." Still won’t follow him back on Instagram.

Odette's Verdict: "I can see why Academy voters skipped this one" ---

Film: 9.1/10

Skarsgård Impact: 8.5/10 ★★★★☆ ("Stellan’s least sweaty performance.")

PSSP: 65% (Stable)

Harkonnen Yelp Review: "0/5. No brunch, just war crimes. ‘Moisture for the moisture god’ my ASS."

The Crow (2024)

Bill - as Eric "I will 10000% make this about me by saying it's not about me." aka THE BILL AWAKENING - Skarsgård

Era: Post-Boy Kills World’s mute himbo arc, pre-Nosferatu’s emo vampire era. Best Bill? No. Was he chasing his big-tiddy goth fantasy? Absolutely.

Ruin Method: Slides into your DMs with “u up?” at 3am, then shares his off-key industrial demo. You’d still set it as your alarm.

Odette's Verdict: "0/10, but post a shirtless BTS pic pls." ---

Film: 5.8/10

Skarsgård Impact: 7.3/10 ★★★☆☆ (2.6 of those stars are for the line delivery alone)

PSSP: 48% (Critical Condition)

Nosferatu (2024)

Bill - as Count Orlok "I gotta make up for that line delivery while staying on theme" - Skarsgård

Era: Post Crow, Pre Locked. There is a theme here.

Ruin Method: You respond to his "Art thou free this eve? (I hunger) text, forces you to look at his creeping shadow while he hums Wonderwall.

Odette's Verdict: "Nepotism is bad. Not the best Robert Eggers film. Fight me. Also, ew - toxic. " ---

Film: 6.9 (Odette is right, pacing was off - don't lie to yourself)

Skarsgård Impact: 9.8/10 ★★★★★ (The man hisses in iambic pentameter. Enough said.)

PSSP: 48.06% (Adjusted for inflation, you can't be ruining real estate just because).

Transylvania Airbnb Review: ★☆☆☆☆ "Host demanded I renounce daylight. ‘No mirrors’ policy strictly enforced. Would let him curse my bloodline again."

Locked (2025)

Bill - as Eddie "You will discover your new kink, your directorial signature, and the OG psycho of your dreams will pass on the torch in the most fatherly way possible, while I'm making you my baby mama." - Skarsgård

Era: Post-Nosferatu. A daring experiment of Bill flying solo in a high-stakes heist gone psychological. The best Bill for now.

Ruin Method: I’ll steal your car and your heart, all while schooling you on the real consequences of street smarts and dump you on my way to get my kid.

Odette's Verdict: Absolutely not. --- Film: 6.7/10

Skarsgård Impact: 8.9/10 ★★★★☆ (Points for survival skills, deducted for not eating before the heist.)

PSSP: 29% (Critical Condition)

Would I let him steal my car? No. Would I watch him slowly lose his mind again? Absolutely.