#The kids are reaching their teen years in this save - so I'll finally be able to test out HSY

[plasma-janes]

Revamping an old legacy save home: The Blooms

[ame-to-ame]

Rereading ayaka is in love with Hiroko senpai!!! Last time I read it I don't think it was finished/I didn't finish it but ack. Now I also want to be in love 😭😭😭

[bestygogirl]

BEST YGO GIRL: Round 3, Group D

Match 4

please use this as an opportunity to say why you like a character, not why you don't.

Propaganda under the cut!

Aki Izayoi

An abuse victim who isn't the perfect passive figure but gets to work through her complicated feelings about power, agency, and family. Even with Yusei's help, she is the star of the show when she learns to control her powers and reconciles with her father, it is so fun that a ygo heroine gets to take such an antagonistic role bu not be shamed for her anger

please vote for my main girl, aki izayoi. aki was led to believe she was a monster from a young age by her father, who treated her powers like it made her unworthy of love. as a result, divine was able to swoop in and take advantage of aki's low self esteem. for years, aki believed herself unworthy of love and was molded into a living weapon at the hands of authority figures in her life. she was taken advantage of, and thus when she finally comes face to face with yusei, she refuses to believe he could provide her with unconditional friendship. who would want to be around a monster, after all? aki also nearly beats yusei TWICE in a duel, bringing it down to a single turn difference. she comes toe to toe with him, and it truly is the result of who dueled better. she remains a fierce duelist, btw. the second season, aki gets her duel runner license, and immediately nearly beats the ass of a tournament winning turbo duelist - to the point where once again, a single card is the deciding factor. that's right: she nearly won. if not for a single trap card, aki izayoi would've won. a fierce duelist who was shaped into a loving, caring woman despite years of being beaten down by the world: aki izayoi. vote for her now on your phones.

Shizuka Kawai

Shizuka is obviously very sweet, supportive and positive, but she is also stubborn and brave as hell. There's the obvious ones: Ripped off her post-surgery bandages after being functionally blind in order to jump into deep water to save her brother without a second thought! Perfect win record, won her first ever duel despite having no clue how to play!

But there's a couple really great less obvious character moments as well:

First off, her message to Jounouchi before Duelist Kingdom: It's heavily implied they hadn't spoken in a long time since their parents' divorce. But Shizuka, a very sheltered pre-teen, was the first one to break the silence and reach out to her big brother - even though they were likely deliberately being kept apart by their mother, who seems to believe Jou is a bad influence on his sister. Jou and Shizuka's mom has likely been repeating this narrative to Shizuka growing up, too: "Your brother is no-good just like your dad. Your brother is dangerous. Your brother is a bad influence" etc, etc. But this doesn't stop her from secretly deciding to contact Jou. Shizuka had no idea when reaching out that he'd do something over-the-top like try and win money for her operation. She just wanted to talk to her estranged sibling and update him on her life, including her illness, which was probably really scary for her to talk about.

Second: This kid breaks out of a hospital, still blind and wearing post-surgical bandages after a major operation, to see her brother. She meets all of her brother's friends in one go and immediately is like "Whatever I'll get in your car strange woman, just get me to Katsuya!!" Then after the pier duel she's still so determined to offer what support she can that she gets on the giant aircraft of a well-known local maniac without hesitation. The first things she sees after years of declining eyesight are: her brother nearly drowning, literal gods being summoned, someone she clearly idolizes as a big sister getting Shadow Game'd, Honda getting dropped into a pit of lava, her brother ACTUALLY dying - and she remains kind, cheerful and brave throughout it all.

Third: Despite her clear idolization and respect of Jounouchi, she actually doesn't just thoughtlessly go along with what he says all the time! Several times in the anime, when she feels Jou is being impulsive, stubborn or unkind, she'll call him out on it. A notable example is in Virtual World when Jounouchi suggests they should just leave Kaiba and Mokuba to go off alone. Shizuka firmly tells him "No, that's not the right thing to do," and tries to go off after the Kaibros all by herself. This is really brave as hell, especially seeing as she's evidently prepared to go against ALL of her brother's cool older friends despite being young, a bit naive/inexperienced, and has seen a staggering amount of dangerous things happen to them all up to that point.

Fourth: Virtual World Duel. Yes she has a miniature crisis after seeing her brother's best friend get dropped into lava. But she recovers and wins the duel with a religious-iconography-power-lesbian card. Love that for her.

Fifth: Shizuka is the only character in the entire series to stand in front of Seto Kaiba and say to his face "human lives are more important than card games." And she's not even one of Yuugi's core friend group, who's seen Kaiba at his most vulnerable. From her perspective, this is not only a giant tall scary-looking older guy with the bitchiest resting face this side of the Pacific, he's also one of the most powerful individuals in Domino City (possibly in Japan.) Kaiba is a well-known public figure who Shizuka had previously probably only seen on the news for things like staggering wealth, general lunacy, and patricide. AND YET, she's the one who marches her little self up to him and tells him to land his damn blimp and get Bakura some medical care. (It kind of works, too! Kaiba is difficult and annoying to all of them and implies he doesn't care if Bakura dies, but after Shizuka makes her appeal, only THEN does he admit that KaibaCorp has excellent trained medical staff on board.)

Sixth: Pulls a truly disturbed prank with Mai and then laughs in the face of her brother's devastation. We love a weird kid with an extremely questionable sense of humor. She's definitely fine after all the Horrors(TM) she's witnessed. Probably.

Anyways vote Shizuka she's a fucking great character and the fandom has been SLEEPING on her!!!!

[praxcrown5]

More Cars OCs and Headcanon:

More Doc family headcanon for a fanfic I'm working on.

This time we're gonna focus on his parents.

I use the terms "sire" and "dam" to refer to a vehicle's bio-technological parents. In Doc's era, and before, it was almost always assumed that you meant sire and dam when using words like father/mother to describe another vehicle. In Lightning's era...not so much.

Also, in my HC, cars reach physical maturity at age eleven, after they have their final growth spurt. Only after this point in their lives are they able to reproduce, and it was very common for cars in Doc's day, especially lady cars, to get married and start families at that age. It is also the age where you can legally drink, live independent of your parents, own property, run for public office, and work full-time somewhere other than a family-owned business...though in modern times it's more common for young cars to stay with their parents until their late teens or early twenties.

*NOTE* I'll do a separate post on vehicle reproduction and growth at some point in the future.

Doc's dam, Annette Elizabeth Longhauler nee Glenrunner (factory designation: CS621949346CU07221925 Cycle 9, Rotation 195, Batch 46A), was the youngest of three children sired by Otis James Glenrunner and Elizabeth Marie Glenrunner nee Owen. She had two older, twin brothers: Carl Samson Glenrunner and James Owen Glenrunner, and was manufactured on July 22nd, 1925 at the Cadillac Factory in Detroit, Michigan. She was modeled a in the likeness of an Old World, 1949 Cadillac Series 62 Sedanette.

Annette started learning internal combustion from her father at five, and by eleven she was regarded by many as the second best mechanic in Dawson county, a rare feat for a female car growing up in the twenties and thirties of Cycle 9.

At eleven, she married the youngest child of the Longhauler Family, an International Harvester Semi named Samuel. Despite Sam being on the road most of the year, they started trying for kids...but, no matter how many times they were intimate, they were unable to sire a flame together.

Diagnostic scans revealed nothing out of the ordinary with her reproductive hardware...meaning that Sam's siring cable was the likely culprit. However, when she attempted to bring the issue up to Sam and his parents, her in-laws accused her and her father of trying to discredit the Longhauler name...and began spreading rumors around town that Annette was barren. The constant harassment from her in-laws and the townsfolk eventually got to be too much...and she would attempt to take her own life. She would have been successful had an Oldsmobile named "Ghost" not used his own body to stop her.

Despite her injuries, Annette managed to push Ghost to her family's garage in Dawsonville, and once her own repairs were far enough along, she took over Ghost's repairs so that her father could better focus on running the garage. She would ultimately befriend Ghost and confide in him, and...much to her father's dismay, they would sire a flame together. Annette received instructions to travel to the Hudson Motors Factory in Detroit, and the plasma "flame" that she carried was used to manufacture a child whom she named Samuel James "Hudson" Longhauler Jr; "Hud" for short.

Annette raised Hud as best she could while still working 60+ hours/week at the garage. It was clear, early on, that he wasn't interested in being a mechanic...and that was fine with her; he was his own person, after all. After Hud ran away in '47, her depression got worse and was exacerbated by having to run the family garage and store after her father and brothers were arrested for making moonshine. She was aware of Hud's racing career, and she made a point to save every news article she could find, displaying them proudly on her cork-board at work.

Annette saw Hud's crash in '54, as the race had been televised, but his sponsor wouldn't divulge the name of the hospital that he had been sent to...and she could only wait for updates in the papers. She hoped that he'd call her at some point, but he never did, and his disappearance after the fact would be the start of an emotional and physical downturn, made worse by Sam's untimely death in '58. Her health never recovered, and she would pass in '59, just two days shy of her 34th birthday.

Personality-wise, Annette was intelligent, shrewd, hardworking, and stubborn. As time went on, she became more brusque, and bitter...but she did her best to tough it out if only to spare her father and brothers from having to worry about her.

Interesting Facts:

Her favorite genre of music was Jazz. She loved fixing and rebuilding engines, and she taught classes on basic engine repair at the local community center. Despite missing him terribly, she never blamed Hud for running away in '47...or for being distant during his racing career, knowing that he was more of a free spirit, like his Sire. Her and Sam's relationship strengthened greatly following the affair, once the social pressure of having a child had been absolved.

Doc's sire was the notorious, Kentucky whiskey-tripper Diesel "the Ghost" O'Twill (factory designation: OR881949C303CU09061922 Cycle 9, Rotation 111, Batch 2A). He was modeled in the likeness of an Old World, 1949 Oldsmobile 88 Rocket Coupe, and was manufactured on September 6th, 1922 at the Oldsmobile Factory in Detroit.

Born into a large family of moonshiners, he was forced to become a tripper at the tender age of seven, literally days after his engine finished growing. His parents cared little for his well-being, and would resort to physical violence any time he didn't instantly obey their orders. Their methods became more cruel with time, but Ghost kept running moonshine for them in order to protect his younger brother (Ivon) and cousin (Sean). In 35', Ghost, Ivon and Sean were almost killed during a routine drop off when the warehouse was raided by the ATF. While nursing their injuries in Morristown, word got out that no one survived the raid. Realizing that this was their one shot to get away from their family...they high-tailed it west, only stopping when they'd reached Atlanta.

Ivon and Sean would open up a restaurant in West End (O'Twill's Place). Ghost didn't much like the idea of settling down, and he would head south to Thomasville after hearing about a guy named Smokey who was recruiting scouts and trippers for Raymond Parkway's moonshine network. Ghost's speed, cunning, and off-road skills were unmatched, and he quickly became Smokey's go-to guy whenever Raymond needed product moved through high risk areas. He would eventually be placed in charge of a group of the best runners and scouts in the region, the aptly named "Still Chasers."

Years later, Ghost was sent on a solo mission to Dawsonville to look for something known only as the "Phantom Still," as Raymond wanted to recruit the owner to his network. He was unsuccessful. On the road back to Thomasville, he stopped a Cadillac (Annette) from committing suicide. They're both injured in the resulting collision, but Annette managed to push him to her family's garage in Dawsonville. While getting fixed up, they became friends, and eventually, Annette tells him about the problems that she was having with her husband and the almost constant, emotional abuse from her in-laws. Once his repairs were complete, Annette asked him if he would be willing to sire a child with her. He agreed...but only after he was 100% sure that Annette's rationale for doing so was more selfless than selfish.

Ghost would have no contact with Annette's family until 1947. While he and his crew were hiding from the ATF in the woods north of Dawsonville, a nine year year old Hudson Longhauler got embroiled in a sting operation meant for them. He gave Hud the option to go home, but the kid chose to follow him and his gang to Thomasville where they would run moonshine together until 1950. He and Hud mostly parted ways in 51' when the latter would begin racing for their mutual boss, Smokey. Ghost would continue running for Smokey until he was killed by the ATF in April of 54'.

Ghost was intelligent, cunning, charismatic...and a self-proclaimed "specialty ladies-man," being easily distracted by lovely, lady cars...but gentleman enough to not to see them as trophys to be won and discarded. He made a point to really get to know his potential partners, investing time and effort into individuals who really seemed to need help...and if they just happened to wind up in their garage at some point, great...but hooking up was always secondary to the emotional connection. He was very loyal to those he called friends, often helping them out in ways that they might not appreciate until years later.

Interesting Facts: He may or may not have had to eat an entire tractor while hiding from the ATF in the Knobs, an area in Kentucky known for its unusual, karst topography. He was somehow able to convince an ATF agent that he was female so that he could sneak a trunk of moonshine through a roadblock. He would Change into a metallic silver paint job with expensive whitewall tires whenever he was in Thomasville for R&R. He became best friends with Hud...and never figured out that that the younger car was his son. Other than Hud, he sired one other child with his scout, Cassie, though they kept it a secret from the rest of the team. He has a very thick, Appalachian accent (Inland South sub-dialect of Appalachian English).

Annette's husband, and the person that Doc thought was his father for most of his life, was Samuel Joseph Longhauler (factory designation: IHC1940KR11360CU11111925 Cycle 9, Rotation 134, Batch 3B). He was the youngest child sired to Spinney and Claire Longhauler. He was manufactured on November 11th, 1925, at the International Harvester Company Factory in Chicago, IL and is modeled after an Old World, 1941 KR-11 International Harvester Company Truck.

At the time he was manufactured, Sam was the largest truck born into the Longhauler family--larger, even, than his uncle Skids whom was an actual logging truck. After his seventh-year growth spurt, he was big and strong enough to haul full loads of corn and rye to Atlanta, and he was eventually coerced by his father to start hauling lumber. By ten he had managed to secure a lucrative contract with the US Railroad Commission, and was hauling lumber all over the southeast. At eleven, his parents arranged for him to marry Annette Glenrunner. Despite being lukewarm to the concepts of fatherhood and children, he and Annette knew that newly married vehicles were socially obligated to reproduce, so they would try every time he was in town. Two years and DOZENS of attempts later, they were still childless. Annette would eventually confront him with evidence suggesting that his siring cable may be at fault...and he would have believed her if not for his parents. They told him that Annette was barren, and he was too afraid of his father to argue. The next time he came home, Annette had a child with her... a child that she claimed was his. He had his doubts right from the start...but since his parents didn't question it, and Annette was happier than he'd ever seen her, he put the matter out of his mind and instead focused on trying to be a good father...despite the fact that he was on the road for much of Hud's childhood.

In '47, Hud got mixed up with a group of whiskey trippers. The ATF tore apart Dawsonville trying to find him...but they found Otis Glenrunner's still, instead. Otis, and his twin sons were arrested...leaving Annette to run Glenrunner's by herself. When Sam saw how much his wife was struggling, physically and emotionally, he quit his job to help her. His father was furious...but Sam stood up to him, earning Annette's respect in the process. This would eventually blossom forth into actual love, and despite all the hell that they were going through, their relationship prospered.

Personality wise, Sam was creative, timid and sensitive. He was much more at home in his uncle's study, studying and drawing maps, than hauling lumber. But the Longhaulers were a family of loggers and farmers, and hobbies like art were considered "idle work." His father would physically and verbally abuse him as a way of getting him to "truck up" any time his behavior "lapsed." By the time he was eight, he had developed such a pathological fear of his father that he took on work that he knew was too much for his body to handle, hoping to earn his father's respect...but it was never enough. Years of abuse, combined with the strain of forcing his body to haul loads that exceeded the recommended weight for his model, left him with deep emotional and physical scars that would make it difficult to form close bonds with people, and--unknown to him--sire children. Later in life, he would develop D.R.A.D, a degenerative disease effecting the bio-technology in his cab where it transitioned to the bio-mechanical and mechanical components of his rear axle. As time went on, the pain became so bad that he couldn't function without immense doses of medication, and he would choose to be humanely euthanized in June of '58 when his condition took a turn for the worse.

Interesting Facts:

He was the youngest of eleven children (he had eight brothers and two sisters...all of whom were various types of trucks). Out of everyone in his family, Sam was really only close to his uncle Skids, and when the latter died in a freak logging accident, he inherited his uncles entire estate...much to the chagrin of his father. He had a photographic memory, and knew the southern and eastern roads so well that he would be commissioned by the US government, off and on, to help plot routes for the Interstate Highway System.

References:

Annette (1949 Cadillac Series 62 Sedanette)

Ghost (1949 Oldsmobile 88 Rocket Coupe)

Sam (1941 KR-11 International Harvester Company Truck)

[my-lunaberg]

Okay, Im pretty sure Ive reached the point at which I originally stopped watching so. yay

To celebrate this occasion I thought I should talk a little about some of the complaints Ive seen about the finale in my for you tab because yeah, I just cant resist looking at it so Ive been spoiled pretty severely and also been dealt a good amount of psychic damage. But hey, its about the journey, not the destination and Im already in Advanced Therapy for my mental illnesses anyway

The two most complaints Ive seen are, it wasnt cathartic and it sends a terrible message. Now, I cant comment on the catharsis bc I havent watched it yet and also Im not even sure if that would be a deal breaker for me. Like, anti-climaxes can be very powerful, Schlatts death is one of my favorite moments in the entire dsmp düfor that exact reason. But that all depends on the execution so I'll save my more detailed thoughts for after Ive actually watched it

The complaint that I wanted to talk about in more detail now is the one about it 'sending a terrible message'

I spend a lot of time watching and analyzing kids shows specifically on the basis of "is this a good show for kids?" Like, kids will watch anything you put in front of them bc they dont know any better so I think its important to put something in front of them that encourages creativity, critical thinking and sends messages of compassion good and other things I cant think of off the top of my head. When analyzing kids shows like this its very important to keep that target demographic in mind because what kids like and need is often different from what teens and adults would consider well-written and thats fine. Theres plenty of kids media that can be enjoyed by teens and adults as well, but its perfectly fine for kids media to only cater to kids and even be actively boring for older demographics.

Keeping the fact that kids media should be analyzed differently than more mature media because its written differently, I dont think it controversial of me to say that, unlike kids media, media for teens and adults doesnt need to teach anything. The way I see it, kids media has messages while adult media has themes. Obviously theres a bit more nuance to this, but Im not trying to write an essay here, Im trying to complain about fandom shit

And I know this might be a hard pill to swallow for some people bc this is the internet where 7 year olds and 17 year olds are basically the same because theyre both "minors" with absolutely no nuance, but teenagers arent children and theyre not so impressionable that seeing a character in a minecraft roleplay be sympathetic towards their abuser is gonna suddenly make them forgive their own abusers if they didnt want to do that before or make them blind or to IRL abuser or whatever man, I dont even really know what exactly the concern is. Like, idk how to tell you this but the line between fiction and reality is not that thin and if the media someone consumes affects them that much theyre either very young or there are some underlining issues that storytellers are not obligated to account for.

Not to mention that dsmp is a story told from a bunch of different perspectives by a bunch of unreliable narrators who are all varying levels of shitty. Like, in kids shows the protagonists and the non-anatgonist supporting characters are role models and vehicles to teach messages, that doesnt fucking apply here, theyve literally made jokes about everyone being an unreliable narrator i dont know why anyone would think this is the kind of series where theyre actively trying to impart some kind of lesson, its literally Fucked Up Shit Happens feat, Fucked Up People: The Minecraft Roleplay

To end this weird long rant, Id like to say that I do understand why people would be upset with the ending (from the details I was able to gleam anyway) and as much as I think complaining about the 'bad message' is invalid and frankly kindof weird, being upset is still totally fine and valid.

Also, if you'd like to discuss this with me I'd appreciate it if you didnt spoil me any further. Like yeah, I already know the broad strokes but I'd still like to have a semi-'organic' experience watching this yknow

Anyway, have a nice day

[barry-j-blupjeans]

12 or 19 with Taakitz? :3

12. “You brought me breakfast?” “Well you said you always forget to eat before you go to work, so I thought I’d make sure you ate something.”

--

Children, Kravitz thought, were designed to sniff you out at exactly the right moments, and pre-teens are even more viciously than the rest. Taako's school is large and slightly intimidating upfront but nothing can compare to being a grown man walking through the hallway as a bunch of eleven and twelve-year-olds rush by you, smelly and glaring and too speedy to even get a good look at their face.

Luckily, some of them have come to expect Kravitz. Unluckily, he had food with him this time.

"Is that Fantasy Wendy's?" a greasy-looking boy asked, falling into step alongside Kravitz. His friends followed, swarming around him. Kravitz held up the bag a little higher.

"Yup," Kravitz said. He turned a corner. He could see Taako's office at the end of the hallway. Almost there.

"Can I have some?" a girl asked from his other side.

"If she gets some, then I want some!"

"Just one fry," begged another. "I haven't eaten anything all day!"

"You just had breakfast, Derek."

"Well, he didn't know that!"

"No, you can't have any," Kravitz said. Several of them booed him. "Sorry! Try saving the world and then I'll get you some Fantasy Wendy's."

"No you won't," said the greasy boy, sourly. Finally, they reached the door. "It doesn't matter that Mr. Taaco saved the world, you'd get him breakfast anyway."

"True," Kravitz said. He knocked on the door and heard a sound from the inside, but wasn't really able to make it out with all the noise around him.

"Not even a single fry?" Derek asked again.

"You know what happened last time," Kravitz said. The door opened and, at long last, there stood Taako. He had his sleeves pushed up to his elbows and the jacket he had left for work in was gone. The groaning of the kids around him died down. Taako looked from them, to him, to the food in his hands.

"You brought me breakfast?" he said.

“Well," Kravitz said, flushing, "you said you always forget to eat before you go to work, so I thought I’d make sure you ate something.”

"Aw, babe," Taako said, and the children scattered at the mere note of affection on his voice. Well, all except the greasy boy, who had been trying to sneak his hand into the bag while they talked. Taako swatted him away. "Keep that up and I'll give you extra homework."

"You don't even teach me," greasy boy said. "And we don't even get homework."

"Do you want to have some?" Taako challenged and greasy boy backed down, muttering a little "no" under his breath and walking back towards his friends. Taako opened the door a little wider for Kravitz. "Come in, Krav. I've got some time to kill."

Kravitz stepped inside, eager to get away from the noise. The door shut behind him, muting it significantly. Taako rounded his desk, sitting at the large chair behind it, and Kravitz handed him the bag. He pulled up a chair for himself as Taako dug in.

"Y'know you can just like," Taako hand a motion with his hands like he was slashing at the air. "Portal your way into my office if ya want."

"I needed the cardio," Kravitz said, in lieu of the truth that he didn't wanna interrupt Taako if he was doing something important. At least knocking gave him a fair warning.

"Uh-huh," Taako said, unwrapping his sandwich. He took a bite, sinking back into his chair. Through a mouth full of food, he said, "Gods, I love bad food", though it came out more as "gowhs I wovh ba fooh". Kravitz sighed lovingly, propping his elbows up on the desk.

"Busy day so far?" he asked when Taako swallowed. Taako made a so-so motion with his hands, opening the orange juice.

"Technically speaking, I literally do jackshit here," Taako said. "But Ren forwarded some forms I needed to sign, so I've been doing those."

He gestured towards the pile of very unsigned papers at the edge of his desk.

"I can see how much those mean to you," Kravitz said and Taako rolled his eyes, taking another bite. "I should probably get going before Lup and Barry blow up another lair."

"Aren't-" Taako paused, swallowing. "Aren't you supposed to like, hang with them so they doooon't do that?"

"They're very convincing," Kravitz said. Taako snorted. "It's a little like talking to your students, actually. Only we're wagering confiscated necromantic objects instead of french fries."

"Exactly like the kids, then," Taako said, grinning.

[huaxxian]

Stone Skipping || CH2 ; 𝘢 𝘣𝘪𝘨 𝘣𝘳𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳'𝘴 𝘳𝘦𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘯

Half a year had passed since [name] and Senku had been revived at the very same day. Experiments were conducted, their home slightly improved, but the two had still made no other progress with the revival serum. Despite that, neither had given up, instead opting to continue trying.

The two teenagers had been gathering sticks in an area near their home, each having an axe of their own. “[nickname],” Senku looks down at their form, who sat in the very same branch he was standing on. Said person looked up at him, tilting their head. “You brought the basket, right?” They nodded in response, silently pointing at the basket below their branch. He nodded thankfully, adjusting the sticks gathered in his arms.

He could see them move to take it from his grasp, but he gave a pointed look, saying, “Don’t you dare take it. I already made you carry three other baskets back home.” A pout overtook their face, but nonetheless, they nodded and sat back down as he cut even more sticks from the upper branches.

rustle, rustle

step, step, step

[name] perked up at the sounds, turning their head to look past Senku’s form. Not even a moment later, an oh-so-ever-familiar form popped from the bushes as he pushed it aside, breathing heavily. The smile on their face widened as Taiju’s eyes widened at the sight of the duo. “S-Senku..! [nickname]!” His eyes teared up.

I found them! They’re alive!

From beside the shorter teenager, Senku smirked at him. “Kukuku, so you finally woke up, eh? You great big oaf, stop making your sibling worry for so long. You don’t want to see them with white hair so quickly, now do you?” He quickly moved down from the tree, offering his hand to [name] after, helping them down.

Immediately upon the teenager’s safe landing on the floor, Taiju started wailing, opening his arms to hurriedly give a hug their way. Not even concerned in the slightest, all [name] did was open their arms, beaming right back.

"You're alive, you're alive!! Senku, [nickname]! I c-can't believe it.."

Well, if [name] wasn't the slightest bit concerned, Senku most definitely was. Placing a foot on his face, the male hurriedly pushed the shortest out of Taiju's way, which ended up being behind him. "Don't hug either of us when you're buck naked, idiot! I'll fucking kill you!" [name] gave his back a pat, shaking their head. "Sen-chan, don't be too mean. You know it's completely just how Tai-chan is." They smiled, turning to the said person. "It's nice to see you after so long.. I would give you a hug, but.. I don't think Sen-chan would let me."

Taiju returned his sibling figure's smile. "It's okay! I get it.." He scratches his head sheepishly, laughing it off. "I think?" They giggled in response, motioning their head to follow them, which he did. Starting their trek back home, Senku spoke, "As of today, it's October 5th, in the year 5738 AD. How long you planning on sleeping in, huh?"

He pointed at [name], who was beside him, skipping as they went. "We've been awake and working for over a half a year now." Taiju blinked in surprise, the information slowly processing in his brain as seconds passed. "Huh?" The brawn of the group looked over to the other brain, confusion evident on his face. "How does Senku know just precisely what the date is..?"

[name] closed their eyes and smiled at him. "Sen-chan just counted, is all." Senku picked at his ear, scoffing. "As if there's another way of keeping track."

Another slow moment of processing.

"..So then, inside that darkness.. the whole time, you.." He glanced at [name] once more. "Did you too..?" His tone of voice had softened considerably, and so had his features. They shook their head. "It was just him, and I knew even then." They smiled and looked forward as Senku pushed aside the branches ahead of them.

"Even if I was able to wake up through sheer willpower alone.. If I were to wake up without means of survival in the midst of winter and with no food supply, it'd be game over. That's why, in order to survive, it was essential that I start in spring."

"That's also precisely why Sen-chan needs an accurate calendar," [name] added, "He wouldn't be able to know otherwise, and luck would be too much of a risk to depend on." Taiju placed a hand under his chin, opening his mouth to ask another question when Senku jerked his head to the front. "Hey, we're here. Don't just stand around gawking, get your ass over here and help out."

Brown eyes widened in astonishment. It wasn't no fancy house, but it was stable and enough. A simple rack made of sticks and vines leaned on the tree's huge trunk, holding several stone spears. "I haven't had enough manpower. [nickname] was of great help, but I didn't want to burn them out than what was necessary. That'd be stupid, I'd be working the only other person in this world death. It took up to an entire day of just drawing up life and survival plans on my own, while they hunted for food and materials. To progress forward into some kind of civilization from here.." He trailed off, glancing behind him to where the two stood, listening to his explanation.

"We've been waiting for you all this time," Taiju pointed to himself, confusion heavily lacing his face. "Yes, you, damnit Taiju. We waited for you because we were both ten billion percent sure that you were alive!" [name] walked forward, now beside the scientist. "You decided to tell Yuzu-chan about your feelings prior to the petrification, and we both knew Tai-chan well enough to know that you wouldn't give up after deciding so."

"Especially not after being cut off in the middle of a man's resolve," he huffed and smirked. "You weren't ball-less to the point of giving up and throwing in the towel after just a measly thousand years!"

Taiju looked down, clenching his fist. It was silent for a few seconds, but as always, with them, it doesn't last long. The fiery determination they had gotten accustomed to seeing had returned ten-fold, and they could only stare as he agreed.

"You're damned right!"

The scientist of the quartet looked over at his assistant. "Can ya get him some damn clothes already?" His nose scrunched in disgust as he pointed shakily at the muscular student, earning a confused and completely innocent look in return. [name] laughed at his obvious disgruntlement, nodding. "I'll go get clothes for Tai-chan!" They waved before carefully climbing their so-called ladder and hurrying inside.

◇─◇──◇─────◇──◇─◇

It didn't take long before Taiju had gotten his clothes, and before [name] was forced to rest by the one and only scientist of the group. The two had bickered back and forth repeatedly; Senku insisted that they take a break, since they apparently wouldn't be getting a lot even with Taiju around. Despite his confusion, Taiju agreed with this, making them reach a compromise.

[name] would rest just as the two wanted them to, but not up in the hut. Instead, they'd be napping on a covered area on the ground near the fire Senku was trying to make.

"When we need to use our heads.. I'll leave the thinking up to the two of you, Senku." Taiju glanced at his napping sibling. "And when we need to use our bodies.. you leave that to me." Senku glanced over as well. They looked comfortable enough, not at all irritated by the grass or the fire crackling nearby. Sleeping like a baby, they simultaneously thought, amused.

Senku turned towards Taiju once more. The time humanity took to climb from the stone age to our previous civilization.. was two million years. But, we're going to dash all the way back to the top all at once. "We'll take back the world and I'll identify the scientific cause on why we turned into stone, and how we were revived.. with the help of [name]."

Careful not to shout as he usually does, Taiju nodded and added, "And then.. I'll save Yuzuriha!"

"Three high school kids.. are going to build civilization from zero. We'll become the Adam and Eve of this world." Senku smirked widely, standing up and placing his hands on his waist. "Now, things are starting to get exciting!"

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The two were calm and quite frankly, inspired by each other's goals, only to panic as [name] sleepily moved around, adjusting their place during their sleep. They covered each other's mouths and stared worriedly down at the shortest of them three, but fortunately, they didn't wake up. Taiju and Senku looked at each other and nodded, vowing not to cause anymore noise.

Senku pointed at their tree house and mouthed, "Bring them up." The other caught on to this instantly and carefully scooped them up in his arms, making sure that they were comfortable and left asleep. Then, without much difficulty, Taiju brought them upstairs, his friend following in tow. He placed them down on their make-shift bed, pulling the extra animal skin they had used as a blanket over them not long after, patting their head affectionately.

Taiju blinked and turned to Senku. "Wait, so was it just you guys this whole time?" The male in question raised his eyebrow. "Yeah, it's just been us." Taiju stared at him, expecting him to say something. "Why are you staring at me like that for??" He opened his mouth, pointing as he whispered, "You didn't tell them about your fee—"

Senku quickly put a zip on his mouth, grumbling.

◇─◇──◇─────◇──◇─◇

The next morning, [name] had woken up to Senku and Taiju still sleeping. It must be pretty early still.. They pushed the blanket away from their form, standing up silently. The teen carefully walked down the ladder, keeping an eye out on the two until they were out of their vision. A yawn escaped their mouth as they stretched their arms and shoulders, shaking their head as they did. What to do..?

[eye color] eyes looked around. They could go hunting for food like mushrooms and animals, but it would be more efficient for Taiju to do it, because he was literal brawn. Though, maybe I should come with Tai-chan later on if he does end up gathering food.. He might take poisonous mushrooms along. [name] could make more jars or baskets, but Senku would most definitely scold them for working too hard. Again.

Honestly, they can't see what he's talking about.

So instead, they opted to walk towards the high school primate's statue. If they could remember correctly, which they could, Tsukasa Shishio's statue was not too far from Yuzuriha and the camphor tree.

True to their memory, it really wasn't far. No animals in sight, nor any other statues in his area. Nature's green, green, and more green is all that could be seen. Pretty, [name] smiled to themselves, gathering the bunch of dahlias and other flowers into their arms. Without much struggle at all, they weaved the bunch into a gorgeous flower crown, one that would surely fit snugly on Tsukasa's head.

They brought it on the male's head, fixing the vines and the petals softly, making sure that his vision wasn't obscured whatsoever. Next, they took a few steps back, admiring their work. As I thought, it does fit Tsuka-chan. [name] nodded in approval and sat down on a nearby root, humming a song they especially liked from back then.

I wonder how everything became like this.. A time-lapse would be interesting to see.

They looked down on the dirt. It was devoid of rocks, unlike the last few areas they've been in. Upon realizing, the teen immediately takes a stick and begins drawing on the ground. Three pairs of nubs.. three heads too. Leek for hair, spiky hair, wavy hair.. Rocket ship. Proud, they grinned and tilted their head, staring down at their work.

It wasn't the best of art, of course. It was merely three little chubby figures that represented the trio that they so deeply treasured. Their proud green faded, and soon, a frown had taken its place. Something's missing.. Quickly, [name] erased the rocket ship outline with their foot to make space. Then, without a shadow of a doubt, they added one more figure.

Long hair and buffy arms.. It's Tsuka-chan!

The grin from before returned anew. The rocket ship outline was quickly drawn again, and for this time, they were satisfied.

"I wonder if Tai-chan is already awake.. or Sen-chan.." They yawned and stood up, brushing away the not-so imaginary dirt around of their skirt. [eye color] eyes glanced behind to check on the statue one last time before smiling. "I'll see you soon, Tsuka-chan.."

With that, they turned back, walking back home.

◇─◇──◇─────◇──◇─◇

When they had arrived, the two were already awake and kicking, arranging their respective areas. Taiju had noticed them first, and with a happy shout, had alerted Senku as well. "You're back," the scientist nodded towards them in greeting. In contrast to his reaction, Taiju immediately got down from their little hut and bounded towards his sibling, hugging them tightly.

"Keep hugging them like that and they'll run out of air, you big idiot." Senku retorted as he followed suit, albeit less enthusiastically and more calmly. [name] only smiled in return, patting the taller on the back. "Big oaf, you up for gathering food?" Enthusiastically, the male in mention nodded his head, quickly taking a basket from nearby. [eye color] eyes glanced at the scientist, as if waiting.

Feeling their expectant stare, Senku snickered and picked at his ear with his pinky. "Of course, you're joining him too [nickname]. Keep him out of trouble, and make sure the idiot doesn't get himself attacked or poisoned." He pressed a hand against his mouth, as if trying to block the snickers.

Not that he was actually trying, though. It was actually the opposite.

Satisfied and amused, [name] closed their eyes and smiled, taking a basket as well. Taiju immediately dashes off, leaving a trail of dust behind him, and causing it to spread everywhere. [name] coughed and looked away from all the sand and dust before waving at the scientist. "We'll make sure not to take too long, Sen-chan.."

Senku gave another nod before turning away. The [hair color]-haired teen hurried, and with some effort, was able to catch Taiju before he could get too far from them.

"[nickname], what should we gather first?" [eye color] eyes looked around cautiously, taking in the environment. From what they could tell, there were some pigs nearby. The rustling as well as their familiar grunts is what gave it away. They quickly pressed a finger to their mouth, to which Taiju immediately silenced himself, waiting for their next order.

"There are pigs nearby. We don't know where the mushrooms are at right now, and since the pigs seem to be a closer choice, let's go with that.." [name] spoke as softly as they could, but loud enough for Taiju to still understand their message. He nodded in determination and moved to single-handedly take any pig on, but stopped as they placed a pale hand on their arm, halting him in his position. He looked towards his sibling in confusion, tilting his head.

[name] smiled at him and shook their head, motioning him to stay still, so he did. Taiju watched curiously as the teen quietly grabbed onto a branch and pulled their upper body up, causing them to now stand. Surprisingly enough, despite all the movement, the rustle of leaves seemed natural, as if it was just a rustle of the wind and not a teenager climbing a tree. He could only watch as [name] looked down at him from their position above, saying, "Please stay here, Tai-chan.. I'll bring them to you, so brace yourself to catch one or two, okay?"

Taiju beamed up at them. "Okay." He responded, lowering his stance and opening his arms wide. His sibling smiled at his determination and switched from tree to tree, getting closer to the area of the pigs, as evidenced by the growing sound of grunts. Few adults.. few young ones, [name] mused to themselves. Some squeals were pitched, but majority weren't.

I can't overwhelm Tai-chan with too many pigs. I can't trap them when they're this close either. The very best I can do is to get one or two younger pigs.. But how do I? They glanced around. They moved to another tree, one that was to the left of the pigs. Tai-chan is to the right. The pigs can't move to the north, there's no entrance or exit there. It's blocked. [name] quickly stood still and observed keenly from above.

There were four adults, but only two piglets to be seen. Sen-chan would be satisfied with one, or at the very most, two of them.

And so, they formulated a plan.

Without further a do, they dropped from the tree, not bothering to cover the noise. The pigs became alert, and soon enough, their eyes had caught on to the teen's form. They grew increasingly loud in sound and scattered, moving towards their left, the other remaining direction for escape. Quickly reacting, [name] ran towards the two mini-groups (stomping and making loud noise with their feet all the while), forcing the piglets to separate from their adults. This time, they moved towards Taiju's direction, just as they had planned.

[name] immediately began creating even more noise, as well as increasing their speed. In panic, the pigs hurried even closer towards Taiju's direction.

Any moment now. [eye color] eyes made contact with familiar brown ones, and they nodded. Taiju shouted as he tackled the two piglets into his grasp, making the shorter of the two smile and stop abruptly. With heavy breathing, they helped him place one piglet in each of their baskets.

"That was a good idea, [nickname]!" Taiju laughed and gave them a particularly hard pat on the back in congratulations, causing them to lose all the air they had regained and double over, coughing all the while.

"Ack— I'm sorry [nickname]!!"

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"Wow, you guys got so much," Senku stared down at the two's baskets, which now sat on the floor. "You got some crazy cheats going with your endurance there, Taiju.." He trailed off as he glanced to his assistant. "You didn't just dash wherever did you? [nickname] looks like they went through a hurricane." The scientist laughed as he pointed at them.

He wasn't wrong there. The poor [hair color]-haired teen had their hair all over their face, with tangles way more than they'd like. Leaves, petals, and even sand had gotten into their hair as well; Senku could only wonder what the hell Taiju had put them through to come back this haggard. [name] only smiled patiently as Taiju turned red in embarrassment, causing him to laugh even more.

"He did exactly that, actually.." Their words only made Taiju shout apologies, to which they shook their head at in amusement. "I couldn't stop him at all, sorry Sen-chan.." They chuckled and jokingly bowed their head in apology. Senku snickered again and walked towards them, patting away all the sand away from their hair. He removed the leaves and petals along the way, tugging gently at the strands that had gotten tangled.

"Don't you worry about it at all. I can't blame you when he's like this." He ignored Taiju's pouting at the side and only continued fixing his [hair color]-haired friend's head. It didn't take much arranging to actually clean [name] up, and soon enough, all was well. They smiled at him gratefully and he returned it slightly before backing away and moving towards the baskets.

Taiju watched in curiosity as he sat on the ground, expecting him to do something completely different, only to see him blatantly separating what they had found. [name], on the other hand, watched in amusement at their brother's reaction as Senku began listing them all off. "Amanita virosa, poisonous! Hypsizygus tessellatus, brown clamshell, edible! Amanita muscaria, Fly agaric, poisonous! Can't you just tell that thing's no good?! It looks like it came from Mario!"

With every mentioned name, Taiju's confused and aghast expression worsened, making them chuckle. "Calm down, Sen-chan.. That was a pretty good haul for the first time. I'm sure Tai-chan will take that into mind next time?" The two looked over to him. One stare was filled with doubt, and the other was one of utter patience and belief. Taiju doesn't respond, only choosing to blink at them in confusion. Senku sighed, "He probably won't, you know. Oh well, I'll bid you good luck when the time comes."

The scientist takes a few of the edible mushrooms and placed them on the sticks over the fire. The trio surrounded the fire they had made in silence, waiting for Senku's word. He first handed a decent-sized one over to Taiju, then proceeded to give an even bigger mushroom to the other teen. [name] blinked slowly as Senku gave them a stern glance. "Get some more fat in your bones, you look like you could get blown away by the wind any moment now."

From beside the [hair color]-haired teen, Taiju also added, "You always ate too less during lunch time too! Get some more food!" He immediately begins handing more mushrooms over to them, with Senku following right away. "I don't think I can stomach t-this much, you two.." [name] gently pushed the food away and just stuck with the one the scientist had given them. "But, I guess I can try eating this one at least..?" they smiled.

It wasn't the best compromise, but it satisfied the two males enough to leave them alone for now. Taiju took the first bite, making [name] and Senku stare expectantly. "D-Delicious!" He shouted in glee, "What'd you season these with?!" Senku grinned and begin taking normal-sized bites into his food as well.

"Just regular old salt that [nickname] and I extracted from the sea water. With just salt added, humans can eat just about anything. Salt is also indispensable when preserving food, and probably was the primitive man's greatest discovery." He explained. Taiju, upon finishing his mushroom, thanked the male whole-heartedly. "For all the things things I'd never be able to figure out! Both of you. I'll repay you in kind with determination and strength!"

He then finished his food and stood up, puffing his chest out in determination. Without even a warning, he took a basket and scurried off, shouting, "All right!! Time to go gather on the back side!"

Senku had opened his mouth to tell him that it was okay, but he had already been too far from their sight. He shook his head and turned to his side, where they sat with an amused smile and a still completely unfinished mushroom. "I don't get how you can keep up with him. He has too much stamina, he has got to be cheating with something." He grumbled, and gathered the sticks his friend had left into his hands. "Should you really be asking me that, Sen-chan? You have known them longer than I have, if anything, I'm surprised you've survived this long.." [name] chuckled and continued eating.

"Speaking of which, the back side is near towards the cave where you came from, right, Sen-chan?" The scientist hummed in confirmation. "Yeah, why?" He glanced over his shoulder, seeing them stand up and brush away any dirt that could have gotten on their skirt. "Maybe we should follow Tai-chan, he might assume there's someone else out there aside from us if he sees the pot.." Not expecting it, Senku let out an amused scoff. "I wouldn't be surprised if he did, he is a big oaf after all. Sure, let's go. His mind can go to absurd places and it'd be easier to explain when we're there."

[ Author's Note ] // So far, these are all the chapters I've pulled from quotev. As of this very moment, I'm working on two separate chapters: a 100-hearts special, and the next regular chapter. For those of you who found this in Tumblr, I made a poll before on what the readers would like for the special. As it turns out, 'Crossover Traveling' won. No one really expressed what they wanted aside from my friends, who I asked personally. I ended up choosing Kimetsu no Yaiba as your destination. That's all for this note, thank you so much for reading, and for your time!

[castielific]

Title: Fancy and the tramp

Story status: Complete, 8 chapters

Rating: Explicit

Tags: Dean/Castiel, Alternate Universe, Fake boyfriends, pretend relationship, homeless!Dean, rich!Cas, family, angst with a happy ending, temporary breakup, getting back together, coming out, past!homophobia, self esteem issues, Dean Winchester has a sexuality crisis, first time, homelessness, bed sharing, pining

Sex tags: anal sex, switching, bottom!Cas, bottom!Dean, first time, frottage, marking, blowjob, fingering, barebacking

Special warning: Contrary to what the title may presage, there are no spaghettis in this story. 

Summary: 

"Okay, let's be clear on one thing from the start. This is not a lifetime movie and I'm straight, so no falling in love, get it?"

"I get it, Dean," Castiel nods.

Well, that's it then, apparently Dean is going to a fancy engagement party with his new fake boyfriend. What a weird day. 

Link to AO3

Chapter 1 under the cut:

************

"Come on Ricky, you owe me that money!" Dean says on his phone, taking a step forward when the line of the coffee shop shortens. 

"I don't owe you shit, Dean. You still owe me the last three months of your rent," his ex landlord says on the phone.

"And I'll pay you, you know I will. But to get the money, I need a job, and to get that job I need some new clothes and-"

"Yeah yeah, I know the deal. You think no one has told me that one before? No bueno, man, I'm keeping your deposit," Ricky grumbles. 

Dean groans in frustration. "Come on, all I need is fifty dollars so I can buy a pair of pants without any holes in it. You give me fifty, I get the job and I pay you back, how does that sound?" he tries to negotiate. 

"Like a fucking lie," Ricky spits just before hanging up.

"No Ric-fuck!" 

The woman in front of him in line sends him a dark look. Dean rolls his eyes at her. Like she hasn't heard worse before. 

Ricky was his last shot. It was a long one, he really does owe that bastard some serious money. Guess he can kiss the job interview at two goodbye. It's some kind of assistant job. It sounds easy enough, buying coffee and picking dry cleaning and stuff. It was still a long shot anyway. Dean's only real job experience is being a bagger boy when he was seventeen and it lasted about two months before his dad decided to move them further east. 

So far, he'd always managed to get by doing repairs or cleaning at gas stops and motels. The older he gets and the harder it gets to find that kind of random job. People are more willing to give a few bucks in exchange for manual tasks to a kid than they are to a nearly thirty years old guy. Now they just tell him to fuck off. 

And since it's always been casual and off the book, the only official work experience he has is the bagger thing. He doesn't even have a high school diploma because he dropped out long before that. Not exactly a stellar resume. Which explains why he hasn't found work in eight month and is currently living in his car. Thank God he has Baby. 

He had been too ambitious thinking he could get his own place. It could only pay rent for about five months before he went broke. He's never had a home before, and had no idea that having an apartment cost so much. In motels, you don't exactly have to pay for water or heat or utilities. There was a bunch of stuff he hadn't planned for that ate up the last of his meagre savings. Ricky threw him out after three months when Dean couldn't scrape up enough money to pay rent anymore, putting a violent stop to Dean's pipe dream of living a normal life. He hoped it would be simpler to get a job if he had an actual address, had even thought about scrapping up enough to maybe get his GED. He's not sure what he's going to do now. 

He's always wanted to be a mechanic. If his dad ever taught him anything, it was how to take care of the Impala. John taught him all the basics and Dean got the knack of it. As a teen, he spent days reading car magazines and working on the Impala, trying to learn as much as he could about how cars worked and how to repair the different parts. He knows enough by now that he could easily work in a garage, but he's got no diploma, and hasn't found anyone willing to hire him on faith alone. 

The line of the coffee shop shortens again, the barista asking her order to the goody-two-shoes in front of him. Dean looks regretfully at the display of sandwiches. He searches his pockets and only comes up with three dollars. Of course, the cheapest piece of food cost four dollars. Dean sighs. Guess just a coffee will have to do today. 

He won't have another choice but to go to the soup kitchen tonight. He hates it there. The food is crap and he wants to punch the prancy people serving it. They always try to give him some Jesus bullshit with his food, like Jesus is ever gonna put a roof over his head and find him a decent job. Neither Jesus nor God nor whatever gives a crap about him. Not that he blames them. Hell, if they exist they're probably not big fans of the guy that used to slip into church as a kid to pick the lock of the donation box

"Just an americano, please," Dean says regretfully when the barista asks for his order. At least it will keep him warm and fill his stomach for a short while.

Halloween just went by and the weather is becoming really cold. He should use the last of Baby's tank to go as far south as he can before winter really hits. He probably won't get farther than Wichita though, and the thought makes him shiver. No one wants to get stuck for a winter in Wichita. Maybe he could go and see if he can make a few bucks at the nearest motel, that kind of place always needs a handyman's help. He hasn't tried the one on Corn Street yet. He's noticed only two lights are still working on their sign, he could offer to help with that. If he makes fifty bucks, he might be able to reach Austin. 

Dean stops on the sidewalk in front of the coffee shop, pondering if he should walk to the bar a few streets down or the motel. Sometimes Benny, the owner of the bar, lets him use the sink in the back to wash up. If he's lucky, he'll even get some leftovers from last night. It's generally just some stale pretzels, cold fries on good days, but it's still better than nothing. He's got two cans of beans and a car with an near empty tank to his name right now, so he's not picky. 

Dean takes a look at his watch. It's eleven thirty already, the leftovers are probably already in the trash at Benny's. The motel is probably his best bet. 

"I'll give you a hundred dollars if you pretend to be my boyfriend." comes a hoarse voice, way too close to his ear. 

Dean jumps, nearly spilling his coffee on himself. He spins to the right to face the man who just talked and is met with a pair of clear blue eyes. Way too close again. He waits a second for the man to take a step back as he realises as close Dean turning brought them, but the guy just continues to stare at him, head slightly tilted to the side. He's wearing an oversized trench coat over a dark blue suit that looks expensive. He's so close a gust of wind makes the bottom of his coat brushes Dean's shin. 

"Dude, personal space," Dean reproaches, taking a step back. "And fuck off, I don't swing that way," he adds, not meanly. It's not the first time he's getting hit on by a dude. Sadly, not even the weirdest. He's strictly into chicks though, so no dice.

"Two hundred bucks," the man insists. He looks ready to fall on his knees and beg, eyes going wider and wider as he throws a panicked look to the right of Dean's shoulder. "It won't take more than ten minutes and all you have to do is nod along," he begs, making Dean wonders if he's in danger somehow. Maybe he has a stalker or an abusive ex? 

Dean follows his eyes to a woman coming closer. She's very elegant in a grey pantsuit and a long white fur coat as she walks straight toward them. He can feel her eyes judging him even from thirty feet away, looking at him from head to toes. If he wasn't already self-aware of the number of holes in his jeans, he would definitely be under that gaze. 

"Five hundred dollars," the other man whispers just as the blond woman reaches them. 

"Castiel, dear, you should have told me we would have company, I would have notified the restaurant," the woman says, sending a clearly disapproving look toward Dean as she deposits a kiss on the other man's - (Castiel, apparently, what kind of name is that??) - cheek. 

"Mother, let me introduce you to my boyfriend," Castiel says, looking ill at ease. He's obviously not a very good liar. 

Dean blinks a few times as their attention turns toward him. Castiel seems to be trying to communicate something with his eyes, and Dean frowns in incomprehension for a moment before he gets the hint. 

"Huh. Dean. Winchester," he finally says. "Ma'am," he adds when she just continues to stare at him like he has grease smeared all over his face. He's pretty sure that she wouldn't want to touch his hand if he were to offer it to shake, so he doesn't. 

"Naomi Novak," she introduces herself. "What a delight to finally meet Castiel's new companion," Naomi says, her deadpan tone contradicting her words. "Of course, I would have preferred not to be ambushed by such an announcement. Castiel, you know, that Le Délice hates it when we change our reservation last minute. Who knows if they will even have a table for three," she declares, already composing a number on her phone. 

"It's okay, mother, Dean won't be joining us for lunch."

"Oh, is it because your attire isn't appropriate?" Castiel's mother asks, looking at the holes in Dean's jeans and the big leather jacket that used to be his dad's. "I assure you they won't say a word about it if you're with us," she reassures. 

Dean squirms a little, wondering what the hell is even happening. Ten minutes ago he was buying a coffee and going at his day like a perfectly normal person (well, albeit a homeless and jobless one). Now, his fashion sense is being criticized by the mother of a man who is pretending to be his boyfriend. Did a piano fall on his head or something? Has he finally lost his mind?

He looks to the man beside him. He's scratching the side of his neck in nervousness. The move makes his coat fall a little over his wrist, revealing a freaking Rolex watch. Dean looks back to the woman, eyes sliding on her diamond earrings and the huge rock around her neck. 

You know what? That's not okay. His stomach has been crying for food since last morning, and he's what? Supposed to help this stranger by saying no to free lunch at one of the most prestigious restaurants in town? Fuck no. He's gonna eat like a king and make a few hundred bucks off the back of those rich assholes. 

"In that case, it would be my pleasure to join you," Dean announces with his most charming smile. 

"What?" Castiel can't help but bark. "But y-your work thing?" he tries, sweating. The round panic eyes are back. Dean sends him his best shit eating grin. They both know he now either has to invite this stranger to lunch or reveal the lie to his mother. The guy is trapped and may as well continue to play along.

"It's not as important as a chance to finally get to know your mother, honey," Dean answers. "He's told me so many nice things about you, Naomi. Can I call you Naomi?"

"Of course, dear," Naomi says. She looks a little wide eyed too, probably thrown by Dean turning on the charm to the max.

"Perfect! We shall go now, we don't want to miss your reservation. I do hope it won't be too much of a bother for them to add a chair to your table," Dean says. He should probably tone it down with the pompous tone, because he nearly added an English accent here. 

Naomi leads the way, and Dean is going to follow when a hand grabbing his arm makes him fall a few steps behind. 

"What the hell are you doing?" Castiel hisses.

"Acting as your boyfriend?" Dean says innocently. By Castiel's glare, he's not fooled. 

"I asked you to nod silently for ten minutes, not to do method acting for a whole meal," he reproaches. Naomi sends a look behind her shoulder and Castiel smiles at her like there is no worries, indicating for her to lead the way, 

Dean shrugs. "I had some free time."

"I'm not giving you more money than planned, if that's your goal," Castiel says with a suspicious squint. 

"I'm fine with the five hundred as long as you're also paying for lunch," Dean says, wiggling his eyebrows as they walk toward the restaurant. Something passes on Castiel's face that Dean can't quite identify. The other man stares at him for so long that it's a wonder he doesn't trip. He finally relents with a long suffering sigh as they enter 'Le Délice'. 

Apparently, Naomi Novak is prominent enough that they don't mind changing her reservation after all. They're seated at a table near a legit indoor fountain. Dean is looking around, trying not to let show how impressed he is by the place. The walls are made of stone and covered in frescos that he always thought you couldn't see outside of a church or castle. A waiter gives him a leather covered menu and Dean opens it eagerly. After a few niceties to Naomi, they're asked what they want to drink. Dean has an inkling that he probably shouldn't ask for a beer in an establishment like this. 

"Same for me, please," he says after Castiel ordered some wine with a name Dean can't pronounce. At least, he hopes that's wine. Who knows. Hell, in this place the bottles of water are probably more expensive than his usual brand of beer. 

Dean starts to second guess his decision when he realizes that the menu is in french. What is it with rich people and France? He just wants a damn steak, how do you say that in french? Is there even steaks here or is it just frog legs and snails? Oh god, he hopes not. 

"I think I'll take the duck today," Naomi notes. "Nobody cooks it better than chef Francis. How about you Dean? Have you ever come here before?" There is a mean glint in her eyes that says she knows perfectly well he hasn't. Hell, from the side eyes he got from everyone as they crossed the room, everyone here knows he's not from their world. There are three holes in his jeans, threads hanging from the bottom and his dad's leather jacket probably should have ended up in the trash about three years ago. Even now, it's still too big for him and the sleeves are so scruffed that they're nearly paper thin. The original dark brown color has turned to a light beige in most places from wear. His scruff is just the bad side of too long now, and he hasn't had a haircut since April, strands starting to fall into his eyes. At least, he's wearing his best plaid shirt and managed to wash up last night, so he's not smelling too rank. Why would Castiel pick him out of all the people in the street at that moment to play his boyfriend? It makes no sense at all. From the guy's obvious discomfort as he hides behind his menu, he probably realizes it. 

"Actually, Naomi, duck sounds like a delicious idea," Dean says, voluntarily ignoring her question. To be honest, he’s never even eaten duck before, but it's poultry so it probably taste like chicken. You can't go wrong with chicken, right? His stomach certainly likes the idea, gurgling so loudly that he has to hide it behind a cough. 

Castiel ends up ordering some fish and soon their drinks arrive. Dean barely has time to sip at his red wine before Naomi pounces. 

"So, tell me everything, how did you two meet?"

Dean nearly chokes on his drink. Castiel seems to gulp down his whole glass. 

"We met at a coffee shop. Dean was in line in front of me and we started to talk," Castiel explains, not quite meeting anyone's eyes.

"How quaint!" Naomi exclaims, clasping her hands in delight. "I'm just sorry that you didn't tell me about it sooner, Castiel. How long have you been keeping this charming man a secret?"

"Not-," Castiel clears his throat, "-not long."

"Well, it's nice to finally meet you Dean. I sure wish this luncheon will give me the chance to learn everything about you."

Luncheon? Who even talks like that outside of Downton Abbey?

"I do hope I'll get to keep some mystery, we wouldn't want this guy to lose interest," Dean says with a wink. He pats Castiel's hand on the table. Should he hold it or something? How open on PDA are gay people those days? Not that he knows more about how heterosexual couple act in public anyway, especially in those crowds. It's probably safer to keep the PDA to a minimum here. 

"You have to at least tell me some things. For one, what career path are you on?" She looks like a shark circling her prey. 

"I'm a mechanic," he lies. He'd rather stay as close to the truth as possible. It's a little unfair that Castiel is letting him do all the talking when his initial demand was that he stayed silent, especially since it's his skin that Dean is apparently saving, but the guy looks like he's swallowed a potato whole. 

"Oh, that's...interesting," Naomi says in that insincere tone of hers. She looks like he told her he was fucking children’s corpses every full moon. He's two seconds away from telling her that he's actually jobless, penniless, and homeless, just to see her face, when Castiel intervenes. 

"How is Anna's engagement party coming on?" 

Thankfully, this seems to be a subject Naomi loves because she tells them about every aspect of the future party all the way through their meal. 

Duck, as it turns out, is actually very good. It's more like red meat than chicken, which is a great surprise. Although, Dean isn't a fan of the way rich people put tiny quantities of food in very large plates. He eats all the dinner rolls and scrapes every single bit of sauce out of his plate, yet he's still hungry by the end of it. He nearly starts crying when the waiter asks them if they'll take dessert and Naomi declines. He's starting to wonder if that little piece of duck was worth sitting through lunch with her. 

"That sounds like you're turning this into a wonderful event, mother, Anna must be delighted," Castiel compliments. 

"Oh, you know your sister," Naomi waves it off. "It sure feels like a nice opportunity to introduce your new beau to everyone."

Dean frowns. What's a beau? Is that him? That's not him, right?

"I wouldn't dare take any attention away from Anna," Castiel tries to refuse. 

"Don't be daft, you know your sister won't care. Everyone will be so happy that you've finally found-" she passes a long look, over Dean, like she's doubting anyone would actually approve of him. She certainly doesn't seem to, "-someone," she finishes lamely. 

"Oh shoot, I don't think I'm available that night," Dean tries to play off. 

"I'm not sure I've told you the date of it yet."

"Cas did," he says. The other man perks up at the surname, but whatever, 'Castiel' is a mouthful. "And I have this huh work thing, you know? Bummer," Dean says with a fake pout. 

"What kind of 'work thing' can a mechanic possibly have on a Saturday evening?"

Dean tenses up, pursing his lips. "One he can't get out of?"

"Nonsense, you're coming," Naomi brushes off. And that is that apparently. Shit. There is a vein about to pop on Castiel's forehead. "Castiel, dear, you look a little white. Was the fish okay?"

"I-Yeah-I-Actually, do you think we could possibly cut our lunch short? I am indeed feeling quite unwell."

"Of course, my dear," Naomi says, leaning forward until her hand touches his forehead. "You're as clammy as a fish. I should come home with you, and make sure you're okay," she announces, taking her napkin off her lap and deposing it on the table, ready to stand up. 

"No!" Castiel stops her, a little too brusquely. "I-Dean will take good care of me, don't worry," he says, getting up and grabbing Dean's arm so he does so too. Dean follows his lead, all too happy to get out of here. "Stay and enjoy your tea, mother."

"If you say so," Naomi says, sending an unsure look at Dean, obviously upset at being brushed off in his favor. "Call me this evening, or I'll worry all night."

"Of course, mother," Castiel acquiesces, kissing her cheek. Dean hovers behind him. Is he supposed to kiss her too? Wave hello? Shake her hand? 

"Dean," she says as what is apparently a sufficient goodbye. Thank God. "I'll be sure to see you on Saturday," she reminds just as they're walking away. 

Cas turns on him as soon as they're outside the restaurant. 

"What was that?!" he asks, not quite yelling. He starts pacing, rubbing a hand through his already pretty ruffled hair. 

"You owing me five hundred bucks? Dude, you're lucky I don't charge you more for the fresh hell I just lived through."

"You went through hell? You?!" his pacing gets faster and Dean has an idea that if he stops pacing he might punch him in the face. 

"That's what you get for asking this kind of stuff from a perfect stranger," Dean shrugs, pushing a pebble with the point of his shoe. His red sock is peeking out from a tiny hole near his big toe. It's such a contrast to how grand everything and everyone looked in there. It's making him feel like shit. He's maybe feeling a tiny bit guilty for trapping Castiel like that too. He doesn't seem like a bad guy, albeit one with a psycho mom.

Cas turns on him, eyes glaring and mouth open in what will probably be a flow of reproaches. He stops himself before he says anything though, seeming to deflate. He closes his eyes and takes a deep breathe instead, shoulders falling. "I'm sorry. You're right. I should be thanking you. I have no right to make you any reproach when I brought this on myself."

"It wasn't so bad, though, was it? I mean, I think I sold it?" Dean asks, a little hesitant. He even used pedantic talk and everything. 

"You did as well as could be expected."

"That's not much of a compliment…". 

"I shouldn't take more of your time," Cas apologizes, taking his wallet out. Dean goggles at the amount of cash in there. 

"You really shouldn't have that much cash on you, that's, like, asking for trouble."

Castiel squints at him like he's wondering if that means Dean is gonna rob him for a moment, before he hands him a wad of cash. 

Dean's eyes bulge out, "That's way more than five hundred dollars."

"There's also an advance in there to buy some clothes for the engagement party."

"The what now?" Dean blinks dumbly for a second until his brain catches up to what is happening. "Dude, no, I'm done!" 

"You were the one to push it so far in the first place," Castiel reminds. Accuses, really. 

"I just wanted to eat fancy food, okay! Not, like, go steady."

"There will be lots of food at my sister's engagement party," Castiel tries to persuade. Badly. 

Dean gives him a nonplussed look. The cash feels heavy in his hand. He's never had so much before. This could help him get a new start. What's a night of playing Downton Abbey compared to the many many nights he might not have to freeze his ass off in the backseat of his car thanks to it?

"Why are you even doing this anyway? And why would you choose me? Do I look that desperate for cash?"

"No," Cas says after what's definitely a too long pause. Dean scowls. "You were in front of me in the coffee shop line. I heard you talking on the phone. You said you needed some cash to buy a new outfit for a job interview. Begged, really."

"Where the fuck do you get on listening in on other people’s conversation?" 

"I didn't listen, I just heard."

"You know, what? Fuck you," Dean spits, "I don't need that bullshit in my life right now." He has enough cash to get to Austin and replenish his stock of food, even buy some new clothes. At least this way he can keep his dignity rather than being insulted by a bunch of rich assh-

"Please," Castiel begs, following him as Dean storms away. "You don't understand…"

"Oh I understand perfectly," Dean says, stopping and turning around so brusquely that they nearly bump into each other. "You think you can shit on other people from your high horse and that they'll still do your deed for a few hundred bucks. Well, I'm not your freaking puppet, man."

"I have never shitted on any-" he stops himself with a frustrated groan, before turning on the puppy dog eyes. "Dean, please. Listen to what I have to say at least?"

"I know what you're gonna say. I've seen that movie before, Cas. You're going to bring me to that party, so you can parade me around like I'm some earned price or some shit. Meanwhile you get to appease mommy dearest and the clan of hyenas putting pressure on you to find a husband, while still having the satisfaction of giving them a huge fuck you by bringing a guy like me instead of the golden boy they're dreaming of."

"I-" Castiel stops himself, pursing his lips. "That's actually not that far from the reality."

"Of course it isn't. Told you, I've seen that trope before. Except this is real life and your plan sucks, so you can keep your money and I'll keep my dignity. Just grow a pair and tell them all to fuck off, will ya?"

"You sure do like saying that to people," Castiel sulks. "Are you sure you can't do it for me?" 

"Oh believe me I would love to tell your mom to fuck off, but I like my balls attached to my body, so that's a hard pass."

Castiel laughs slightly at that and Dean can feel his own anger start to abate at the sound. "Good self-preservation instinct on your part," Cas mumbles. The puppy look is still there, except now it's making him feel like he's kicked the puppy.  

"You know, we're in the 21st century, right? You shouldn't feel pressured to the point of inventing a boyfriend. Who gives a shit about that nowadays?"

"My family does," Castiel answers in a long sigh. "You don't get it, how could you... I have three brothers, Dean," Castiel explains. "Two sisters. My little sister, who is just nineteen, just got engaged. I was already seen as the irremediably unwed one and now I…," he pauses, sending a nervous look at Dean, looking ashamed.

"Oh come on. How hard can it be? You're rich, objectively good looking. Do you have weird kinks or something?"

 "I-I wouldn't know. I've never even been in a relationship before," he confesses, looking at the ground.

"When you say 'relationship', you don't mean you've never…" Dean inquires. Cas' cheeks redden, and Dean blows like he just got punched. "Wow. That sucks."

"Yes, it's very pathetic."

"What? Eh no, it's not pathetic. Surprising, yeah. But, to each their own, you know?"

Cas inclines his head like he's not sure he does know. 

"I'm sorry I tried to drag you in all of this. You seem like a good man. You don't deserve-"

"-to be served on a platter to your family?" Dean asks, searching Castiel's gaze until they exchange a smile. 

"Yes. That." The man is still looking dejected. The money is still in Dean's hand. That duck really was good. Damn it.

"The food better be freaking awesome," Dean relents with a frustrated grunt. Castiel seems instantly relieved. "And you're not pretty woman-ing me," he warns, pointing a finger at the other man. "I'm choosing my own clothes and I don't give a shit if I don't know which fork to use for fish."

Castiel's head is tilted and he's blinking owlishly, like he doesn't understand a word that Dean is saying. Figures. He's not sure how he could convince anyone that he's this dork's boyfriend, honestly. Naomi certainly looked like she wasn't fooled. 

"I'm sorry for the way my mother behaved toward you. I assure you, being yourself will be amply sufficient to the task."

"Dude, the way y'all talk, where do you come from, Victorian England?"

"I-I don't think I have English ancestry, no. Why?"

They blink at each other for some time. 

"I must be a freaking masochist."

Cas' face scrunches up even more in incomprehension. 

"Okay, let's be clear on one thing from the start. This is not a lifetime movie and I'm straight, so: no falling in love, get it?"

"I get it, Dean," Castiel nods. 

Well, that's it then, apparently Dean is going to a fancy engagement party with his new boyfriend. What a weird day... 

You can read the rest on AO3

[stuckinapatriarchalbullshitland]

Underrated///Brie Larson's Album

So ... Ugly.

The truth is that I did not expect to discover that Brie had started singing so young. Finally Out Of P.E. It was released in 2005 when she was sixteen years old. She was basically still a child and the video above proves it. For me it is inevitable to compare her with Taylor. First, because Taylor started in music a year before Brie and they both share the same year of birth, 1989. Except that Brie started working in the film industry at the age of ten. I think even before that too.

But what I come to. FOOPE (the album). It was very underrated at the time, because the lyrics of the songs were very teen. There was no PR circus behind the album. In fact, she said this about the theme of it:

"I really don't have a lot of experience with guys ..." (cough, cough, Camila, cough, cough)

But outside of that, the lyrics on the album are pretty sad. Three of her most emo songs are Loser In Me, Invisible Girl and my favorite, Ugly.

Lyrics:

"Ugly"

My insides are turning inside out

Leaving my heart, my flaws all hanging out

What's so interesting about little ol me

All I see inside is so ordinary

I can't look at myself

I can't find nothing special hiding in me

I can't look at myself

U tell me it's there to see but all i see is so ... ugly

It's not like I'd put a gun to my head

I really try to listen to all you've said

If I could only sleep a long while

Maybe tomorrow I'll feel a speck worthwhile

I can't look at myself

I can't find nothing special hiding in me

I can't look at myself

U tell me it's there to see but all i see is so

I'm lucky to have a liar as good as you

I wish I could feel as good as you do

So I'll follow your lead

Hoping to see something good in me

I can't look at myself

I can't find nothing special hiding in me

I can't look at myself

U tell me it's there to see but all I see is so ... ugly

My insides are turning inside out

Leaving my heart, my flaws all hanging out.

If Brie has said that the album is based on her personal experience, I can't imagine what her life must have been like as a teenager in the industry. Not just with this underrated album, but in Hollywood.

I remember she said she described herself for a long time

That she is an introvert with asthma, which was her story for a long time. "I'm an introvert, I'm scared, I have social anxiety." And she doesn't identify that way anymore.

But for me it is sad to know that. That she lived so long under this depressing concept of herself and what she went through with Captain Marvel has only made it worse.

From what I have been able to see in her videos, she really has the undervaluation issues about her. I don't know if folks have noticed, but Brie loves to mark her name on clothing and purses.

In psychology that shows someone who is more than self-centered, she has self-esteem problems. She talks about someone who needs reinforcement of the appraisal and apparently Brie is still dealing with the old demons of hers (plus she talked about having eating problems for a long time).

I don't have the video where I saw that part or read it, but it's what I remember.

I don't know why I feel that her ability to recreate very dramatic characters comes from her own personal experience, where Brie has the opportunity to let that part of herself flow into the dramatic characters that she plays and at the same time free herself, purge herself of that side. of herself who, with what I've seen, is still struggling.

I guess that's why her participation in the Hot Ones web series with Sean Evans still breaks my heart a bit where Brie was commenting on her "unintentional participation" in the Kardashian-Jenner photo of the Met Gala bathroom in 2017, where she said that he didn't know any of the cool kids and at the same time he was fingering his face with hot sauce. Sean Evans told her to take care of her and she surprised said something like "thank you for taking care of me". Not with those same words, but the same meaning and that was what broke my heart because it makes you understand that they never protected her from her. And no, I don't mean her family or friends but her work environment. The industry. That shit hole where she's been since she was little.

I think what has saved Brie even though it doesn't suit her career much is being away from the main focus. Having had to fight a lot to be where she is, because despite the fact that she has become recognized after the Oscar and more for her drama in Captain Marvel and the MCU, she is not a new face. She has worked her entire life in the industry with more or less luck and that's the screw of the show. Reaching the top is one thing, sticking to it is quite another and you have to be willing to fight to get there.

For one reason or another I identify with Brie and hers struggles with hers, I guess that's why I like her so much, even though there are a lot of bigger and more popular names than her.

Despite her struggles, she remains true to herself and that is something that I will always admire and love.

[ilovereadingandilovebreathing]

Ooo I have a few weakness for irondad stuff ._. Could you maybe write Peter taking care of his dad? Or maybe Tony noticing how strong Peter is and how much he has to hold back during hugs? Or hmmm what about comfort cuddles? Honestly anything would be fine though ^-^ cause I love what you write and as long as you have fun with it I'm pretty sure I'll love it! But yeah! I hope maybe these suggestions help ^-^

IronDad writers have literally been making and breaking my whole life these last few months LOL How about all 3?? Great suggestions, Nonny! I appreciate you. This helped immensely.

Random AU in which May is dead and Tony adopted Peter. Shocking, I know, but you said dad, so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Characters/Genre: Tony Stark & Peter Parker (IronDad & Spiderson); mostly hurt/comfort, tbh

⚠️ warnings: mentions of gun violence (yes I brought up Ben. Don’t hate me.), crying, broken body parts

•••••••

“Hey, Pete.” Tony tried to keep his tone light as Peter fluttered around him like an anxious little bird; the boy muttered quietly to himself as he pushed various pieces of furniture a few inches to one side, looked over the set up, and then pushed some of them back the other way again.

“Pete.” Peter seemed to not hear Tony at all as he breezed toward the kitchen at a brisk pace, quickly returning with a cold compress which he absently laid on the coffee table just out of Tony’s reach.

“Peter!” Tony’s tone was loud but not angry as he called out to the teen; Peter jerked to a stop, seeming to come out of a trance as he stared and blinked at Tony for a good five seconds before speaking.

“Yeah? Why’re you yelling?”

“Because I tried to get your attention in a normal person way, but apparently you’ve focused all of your energy on scuttling around like a frightened hen instead of allowing your ears to pick up sound outside your own head.” Tony accentuated his comment with a grin to show Peter he wasn’t truly upset with him, but Peter’s face fell anyway, his eyes wide and shimmering as he pointedly only looked at Tony’s face. “Oh, sh- Awh, buddy...”

[[MORE]]

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Tony. I didn’t mean to upset you. Please just relax. I can go to my room if that’ll make you feel better. Or I can just leave all together, I guess; I’m sure Rhodey or Happy could-”

“Kid. Stop. Before you give yourself whiplash.” Tony sighed and gestured for Peter to walk toward him. “Come here.”

Peter stayed frozen in place, a look of horror washing over his features that might have been comedic if Tony didn’t know it was genuinely wrought from a place of fear.

“Pete. You’re not gonna break me, kid.” Tony grimaced when Peter flinched, catching the mistake far too late. “You know what I mean. Just get over here or I’ll come over there.” Tony reached for the crutches propped nearby, wrinkling up his nose and making a mental note to get to the lab to make a suitable replacement when Peter wasn’t looking. If that was possible.

“No! No no no! I’m coming; I’m coming. Don’t move!” Peter scurried over to Tony and stopped inches from the side of the couch; his eyes shone even brighter than before, and Tony braced himself for the inevitable flood. Peter hadn’t cried since everything started, and he knew it was only a matter of time before the kid’s guilt shattered him to pieces.

Tony shimmied back so that his side was against the back of the spacious sectional sofa, patting the now empty space beside him. Peter eyed him warily, finally looking at all of Tony before letting out a shaky sigh.

“Please, Tony.” Peter whispered, his voice catching painfully. “I....I can’t. Not yet.”

“Okay.” Tony reached out a hand, and Peter took it slowly, eying Tony in case he tried anything. Tony smiled stiffly and rubbed his thumb over the back of Peter’s hand while studying the boy’s face carefully. “It’s not your fault, Peter.”

Peter jerked violently and dropped Tony’s hand; he stared in disbelief at his mentor-turned-father, his mouth slightly agape and nostrils flaring. “That’s...how can you say that?” His voice was low, but his tone was bitter and biting though Tony knew Peter’s ire was not aimed toward him. “You wouldn’t be in this situation if it wasn’t for me.”

“I mean, you’re not wrong.” Tony sighed at Peter’s shocked expression. “You definitely played a part in this situation, but so did I. And so did the idiot who didn’t know how to stop or redirect a pair of ice skates. I guess he was shocked that a toothpick could pick up such a hunk of meat.” Tony snorted but immediately ground his teeth together when his comment didn’t soften Peter’s gaze at all. “Look, Pete. Times were had. Mistakes were made. Tonys were dropped, and a foot was broken, but it’s not the end of all things, okay? I’m not a fragile little porcelain bird; I don’t always shatter when I fall, but this time just happened to be a bad break. No pun intended.”

“But that’s the point!” Peter was actually on the brink of a breakdown, his voice manic with fear and guilt. “You’ve done so much in your Iron-Man suit, and you’ve ended up okay. I’ve been so careful to control my powers, but the one time I decide to have a little fun, I screw everything up by being careless, and now you’re hurt!” Peter threw an arm toward Tony’s left foot which was encased in a red cast and propped on a stack of throw pillows that had come with the couch.

“It was fun, though.” Tony drew up a fond if not slightly devious smile. “I haven’t been carried around like that since I was a kid. I felt like a five-year-old. And the look on that guy’s face. I’ve never seen a man more terrified of me. Did you hear how he said, ‘T-Tony Stark?!’” Tony brought his hands to his mouth in a cartoonish manner, eyes comically wide and teeth chattering like a frightened Scooby Doo. He quickly dropped the façade and smirked devilishly. “I wonder if he thinks we’ll sue. We’ll hold off on making a statement; that’ll be plenty of karma for my foot.”

Peter’s brow creased at “we,” but he stayed silent, pulling and twisting at the edges of his sweater’s sleeves and worrying his bottom lip between his teeth.

“Pete, I can’t truly have fun with the situation if you’re all pouty like that.”

“What’s fun about this?” Peter grumbled and slouched with his arms crossed.

Tony laughed out loud, startling Peter with the boom in his tone. “Now you look like the five-year-old. There’s plenty that’s fun. I can order Happy around in a way I haven’t been able to since Afghanistan. He’s even better than you at the worried hen impersonation.” Tony just wrinkled his nose at Peter’s sidelong glare. “Pepper won’t dream of getting on my case right now; at least, not like normal. A short break from Stark Industries stuff is a nice change of pace. Definitely no Avengers stuff for a while which is fine with me. I need time here to settle in with my kiddo.” Tony’s features softened when Peter’s cheeks heated with a blush; the teen refused to meet the billionaire’s gaze, so he continued on quietly. “My son. My adopted child named Peter Parker who is one of the best things that’s ever happened to me, regardless of what has happened or will happen. Sleepless nights and broken feet and all.”

Peter worked his jaw painfully, his lips curling and uncurling as he fought with himself.

Tony lightly snapped his fingers and gestured for Peter to meet his gaze, smiling a closed-lipped smile that reached to his eyes before quietly but firmly declaring, “I forgive you, Peter.”

Peter didn’t react at first. He stared at Tony for a moment with his jaw clenched so tight Tony worried he might break a tooth, but then twin tears broke free when Peter blinked for longer than normal, and his face crumpled. He let his head fall forward into his hands as quiet, broken cries tore up and out of his throat.

Tony reached out and tugged lightly on Peter’s sweater until the boy finally acquiesced and dropped onto the very edge of the couch, sitting parellel to Tony. Rolling his eyes, Tony sat up and pulled Peter into his arms, cupping his son’s head with one hand as he cried into Tony’s shoulder. “I know, buddy. I know. It’s okay. I’m going to be okay. And so are you.”

Peter finally wrapped his arms firmly around Tony’s midsection, clinging to the back of his sweatshirt, and Tony tilted his head to rest against Peter’s.

Tony gasped when Peter’s hug became just a bit too hard, squeezing the air out of him, and he felt Peter stiffen in his hold and try to pull away. Tony, however, had no intention of letting go of his kid until his cries died down, so he held Peter tighter and reclined back against the couch, giving them both a second to readjust before sliding his hand back into Peter’s messy curls.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” Peter was muttering repetitiously into one of his hands which was balled in a tight fist against his mouth, trying in vain to keep in his cries.

“I forgive you, Peter. For everything. I’ll never get mad at you for loving me.”

“But I hurt you.”

“On accident. While showing how much you love me by having fun and hugging me. I’m not mad, buddy, so I need you to get out whatever guilt you��re feeling, okay?” Peter took in a gasping breath, and it finally clicked for Tony; he rested his chin on Peter’s head and murmured into his hair. “Not that I don’t think you love me or anything, but what’s really got you so worked up?”

“What do you mean?” Peter stuttered quietly.

“I know you feel bad about dropping me, but we both know I could’ve gotten out easily and that it was the other guy’s fault, not yours.”

“But I snuck up behind and surprised you.”

“So? I could’ve told you to put me down, and I know you would have. Please, kid, you gotta tell me what’s had you creeping around me like a hand-shy stray kitten for the past few days.”

Peter was silent save for his cries, and Tony looked toward the ceiling and closed his eyes, willing himself to be patient.

After a full minute of silence, Peter sighed heavily.

“...You know what happened to Ben?”

“Only what you’ve told me.”

That wasn’t entirely true. Tony had definitely dug up what he could on Ben Parker’s murder, and, putting Peter’s and his pieces together, he knew Peter had his powers when his dad’s brother, a police officer and Peter’s guardian at the time, was shot outside of a gas station in Queens while trying to stop a mugging. Unarmed. Tony had come to understand so much about Peter after reading about Ben’s case.

Tony’s wandering thoughts halted when Peter cleared his throat.

“It’s just...I was there...the night he died. I was in my crummy old Spider-Man costume, watching Queens from a building near the gas station.” Peter sighed a deep, trembling sigh, and Tony felt tears drip onto the hand that held Peter against him. “I heard them yelling, but I figured it was some drunk guys fighting over a lotto card or something, but when I really listened, my enhanced hearing picked up his voice. I tried to web over, but...it was too late.” Peter’s voice cracked and trembled. “So now, knowing that I have these powers that can do good...that could have done good...I don’t want to do anything else, you know? I never want my powers to be a bad thing, so it just sucks so much that I hurt my dad-” Peter cut off with a sharp intake of breath, biting his lip hard and squeezing his eyes shut though tears still leaked out. “That I hurt you, especially after everything you’ve done for me. I just feel so bad.”

“I know.” Tony readjusted them so that Peter’s head rested against his shoulder; his tone was low and even in Peter’s ear. “I know you get your moral compass from Ben and his self-sacrificial nature, and I’m so glad you had someone as loving and dedicated as Ben to raise you during your formative years.” Peter shook against him, his breath coming in short bursts, and Tony wrapped both arms around Peter to secure him as closely and tightly as possible. “But, Peter, you have to drop this guilt, okay? I know I didn’t know Ben, but he wouldn’t want this for you. He’d want you to be living it up and happy with me. Not mulling over something you didn’t have control over. Multiple somethings.”

Peter continued to whimper into Tony’s neck, and Tony just held his newly adopted son, hoping his words sunk in as he allowed the boy to cry himself out as he needed to. The stress of the last day, really the last year since May’s passing, had really worn Peter down to the bone. Despite his healing abilities, Tony had noticed the frequent glaze that settled over Peter’s eyes and the hoarse undertones in his voice. The kid was sleepless, running himself ragged at night being Spider-Man and searching for May’s killer. (Peter has never confessed this, of course, but Tony knew there was a reason Peter just couldn’t seem to make curfew....Plus he’d used FRIDAY to make Karen tattle, but for now, Peter could believe she was keeping it all on the down low.)

Tony had heard (read: read online) some teenager adoption stories that were outright horrific, but the majority of adoptive parents just warned about emotional instability, pushing boundaries, and the critical step of forming strong relationships. Tony had definitely experienced the first two, mainly before he’d even had a reason to adopt Peter, but he often worried about that last part. Was he forming a strong relationship with Peter, built on boundaries and actual bonds? He doubted this often, especially when Peter exploded or they disagreed loudly, but right now, with his kid in his arms and finally, if not too carefully, hugging him back, Tony told those fears to back off.

Peter was his kid, and Tony loved Peter Parker more than any other teenager in the world.

Superpowers, broken foot, crying mess, and all.

[yeahishipthatsowhat]

Revenge [Billie Eilish X Marvel - Bury a Friend AU]

TRIGGER WARNING: This story has torture, death, manipulated suicide, slight gore, and psychological manipulation involved, please don't read this if you are affected or triggered by any of the above. This is your warning, this fic has been tagged accordingly.

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Peter has been bullied for years, he's always the new kid when he's forced to move from state to state for his uncle's job. He had high hopes for Midtown High, but it all crumbles down after he becomes a target of a certain groups hate. His only friend came in the form of Bucky Barnes, a senior like himself, who had approached him on the first day with an offer of friendship.

But even Bucky can't save him in the end.

------------------------------------------------------------

He was blindfolded, a gag in his mouth, and his hands bound behind his back. His head hurt, and he was being dragged somewhere, the cool air on his his exposed flesh, and the sound of fallen leaves being crushed in his wake.

. . .

He hurts, everything hurts, Steve had taken his time roughing him up, Tony watching with a smile on his mouth and a plethora of other ways to hurt him falling from his lips.

Nat had brought a taser. . . both her and Thor had a fun time using it on him.

Clint used him for knife practice, he had only brought three blades, but he was good shot, not once missing his target.

Wanda and Strange, liked to play games with words of malice. Telling him of all they would do to him and those he cared about. Hurting his mind more than his body.

But despite everything, the worse was when he came face to face with Bucky.

Bucky was bound, with a cut in his lips and beginning of a black eye forming on his face.

"I'm so sorry Peter, I tried to stop this, but I can't"

The tears leaving Bucky's eyes were real, and Peter knew it.

When they uncuffed Buck and gave him a gun. Peter knew what would happen next.

. . .

They talked about it, and for the first few days it was great, no guilt, no anger, just some good laughs about poor Peter Parker. But then the things started happening, strange and unexplainable things.

. . .

Steve's heart would race whenever he saw a flash of color. He swore he saw a blue sweater, that blue sweater, at the end of every hallway, but when he'd do a double take no one would be there.

Tony had a feeling he was being watched, his skin prickling when he thought he was alone.

Thor had been getting shocked all day, nearly getting electrocuted in Mr. Banner's science class.

Clint found himself missing things. Things he knew had been left in one place but weren't there when he came back.

Natasha had slipped during gymnastics, a tight lightning like pain shooting through her legs as she when to jump.

Wanda had nightmares that didn't seem to go away when she was awake.

Strange found it harder to focus, a splitting headache every time he looked at his books.

. . .

The small things got worse and worse every day. Laughs and smiles were traded in for baggy eyes from restless nights and the weight of suffering on every shoulder. Spring break might ease the tension they all felt.

. . .

Peter had been missing for a whole week before the first one cracked.

. . .

Tony had gone paranoid, eyes following him behind every corner and through every door.  He couldn't go to sleep, the eyes keeping him up at night, and when he finally fell into slumber, his dream were filled with the image of a beautiful boy and the roses that emerged out of the wounds of his rotting flesh. Inside each rose was an eye staring straight back at him, unblinking and crazed.

Tony could feel a gaze on his back, someone had to watching him, following him. And Tony could only take so much.

He darted past his parents calling out for him, straight out of his house, running and running until for the first time in a week he felt like he wasn't being watched.

To bad he wasn't paying attention to where he was.

The Medical Examiner said he was dead a few minutes after impact with the car, but Rhodey would guess that it felt more like hours.

.

Wanda saw him again today. The sweet boy with the soft brown hair and the pitch black eyes. He was always there, wherever she went. Sometimes he would be alone, and Wanda felt a sense of relief if he was by himself. But when he brought friends, that's where the true terror played out in front of her eyes.

One time he brought a man with horns on his head to her family dinner. She had to watch her family get slaughtered and served as she dined with the demons who ate the flesh off the bones of her loved ones.

Another time the boy brought a small child with flaming eyes with him. They played and played and she had to watch as flesh melted and the world burned in front of her desk in Physics class.

The worse was when she saw her body decomposing, still locked in her head as her she brought her rotting hand to her face and watched she the flesh fell apart.

She couldn't bear it anymore.

"Stop this, please stop the things I see"

The boy simple looked at her and hummed before smiling and walking away.

"Come with me and I'll end the visions"

And so she followed the boy, tripping over rocks and roots, feeling the ocean breeze on her skin. He was the only thing she could see, his hand reaching for hers.

"Come to me and the awful things you see will be no more"

So she stepped forward, a leap of faith, and her foot felt no earth beneath her.

The newspaper read "Fatal Accident: High School Senior Falls Off Cliff"

.

Thor wanted nothing more than to lay in bed and sleep, but the blankets shocked his skin every time he moved. He'd never heard of static cling that hurt so much. Plugging in his phone to charge left him with either mild discomfort or a 2nd degree burn.

Nothing electronic in his house would work for him, everything automatically going haywire and shutting off the moment he got to close.

He probably shouldn't have been out in the rain. But sometimes a storm can move in when it's least expected.

And who knew lightning stuck twice? Or three times? or even five? Or enough that the all that was left was burnt flesh and the smell of a Christmas ham.

.

Clint knew where he put his wallet when he went to shower, it should have been in the same place as always. But lately he was missing things. Missing his bus when normally he's never late. Missing his notes he just took last class. Even missing a catch and breaking his pinky finger.

Clint knew he had put his phone on the wireless charger. He remembered it so clearly. So why did he hear his phone ringing down stairs?

Perhaps the worse thing he ended up missing was not his phone, but the first step on his way downstairs.

He tried to crawl to his phone, his head bleeding and body in pain, but for some reason when he reached where he had thought he had heard it earlier he saw nothing. But a familiar tune of his cell phone ringtone played from up stairs.

Its sad how many teens don't pay attention to where they place their things. You never wanna stick it somewhere you'll regret later.

.

Steve awoke in pain, blue and purple bruises covering his body. Perhaps the guys had been a bit to forceful during practice last night? Suddenly he felt dizzy, and then the feeling of something warm dripping into his chest.

Blood. Another bloody nose. He'd been getting them at least once a day every since. . .

No matter, he'd just have to make sure he was fully focused and in tip top shape for the game tonight.

Its hard. They're losing by one, a two point conversion would get them the win. Just before the play Steve sees the blue sweater, it's dirty and covered in blood. He can feel the pain in his chest and the start of a dizzying nose bleed only after its too late.

He's tackled and underneath two teams. By the time he's uncovered, well . . . let's just say the journalist and activist for higher standards of football safety have their martyr.

.

Natasha couldn't move. It's like she's stuck in place, her muscles tensed as if they're ready for a zap. It takes two whole minutes before she's able to move again.

It happens randomly, in the middle of class, at the beginning of lunch, at the end of dinner, even in the dead of night. Its never really harmed her much, except when she was running for a jump in gymnastics and suddenly her legs gave out.

The doctors say it's 2 weeks in the cast, and by day three she's has had enough of it. It's hard enough trying to get around the house, but her cat sees to have it out for her, dashing in front of her legs every time she tries to move.

Natasha just wants to take a nice bath, soak and relax. The cast's not supposed to get wet, but she's smart, setting up a ledge on the bath to place it.

The bedroom, the kitchen, and the living room, she checks everywhere but can't find her phone. Even from her home phone, but till there's no sound. She must've left it on silent, but there's no way she's gonna be able to relax in the bath if there's no music.

The silence freaks her out to much.

So she takes he dad's old two-in-one radio and cd player, pops in one of her favorite artist and gets the bath ready. Leaving the door open a crack so she's not suffocated by the steam.

When she's finally in, the warm water feels like heaven, her body sinking into the tub. It's nice even though the water isn't filled to the top.

She's too afraid of getting her cast wet.

Suddenly, amongst the sweet sounds of music coming through the cd player, the tub starts filling, water steadily coming through the spout. Natasha has a second to think 'I hate this stupid old house' before reaching to turn the water off. But her hand never touches it. Her body seizes, body fuzzy with static, and bolts of pain lacing through her body.

Her body is lowering into the water, and there is nothing she can do. Panic sets in as her head slowly sinks into the water, and she can barely breathe let alone hold her breath.

She opens her eyes in the tub, trying to stay calm, when she sees it. The familiar black of her cats tail.

Except when the cat turns to look at Nat, it's eyes aren't the usual green she's used to, but instead a stunning red. Maybe the lack of air has gotten to her?

She can feel the pain leaving her body, for a moment she thinks she's in the clear. But then the cat brushes against the player, and she watches as it makes its decent towards the tub.

She screams, the air leaving her lungs, bubbles coming to the surface as the player makes contact with the water.

Was Natasha really so upset about her injury to do this to her self? She seemed so distant the past couple of days. How could they not have seen this coming?

.

Stephan thinks little of wasting a day away by doing nothing but watching tv. But lately he can't focus, his head erupting in pain when he starts to study. Even documentaries are off limits. So he's stuck with children's shows and mindless classics.

Stephan figured a few pills might help the headaches and the sleepless nights. And they do, but only for an hour or so.

One day Stephen ends up staring at a book for a solid hour, unable to focus and read more than a sentence before it becomes too much for him, slamming the book shut and practically running to the bathroom.

Just two pills he tells himself. But it doesn't last as long the second time around. One more pill won't hurt. Two more will make it better. Maybe one blue one and one green one might make it easier. Add in a sleeping pill for when he can't make it through the night. Two sleeping pills might make the nights dreamless.

Every time he takes them it he feels like himself again, but the effects never last long, he needs more and more every time.

Stephen really should be paid attention to the warnings. He was practically chugging the blue pills, green ones sprinkled in, and the red ones, well, he used those more often than he liked.

He's reading one day, yeah that's right, actually reading, when his vision starts to go blurry, his mind drifting, NO, he can't stop now, this part is the climax, the part where all his questions get answered.

He tries to get up to get more pills, but the moment he's off the chair his vision blacks out and he falls on the ground. It takes a second to regain his train of thought, when he abruptly throws up, the taste of bile on his tongue.

When was the last time he ate, really ate, not just a snack? Had he been that focused on reading, on finally being able to connect with the world again that he skipped meals? What day was it? When was the last time he drank water, besides to wash the pills down? How many had he taken?

He questions himself till his head pounds with pain and his vision goes spotty. He sees movement in the corner of his eye, but his head is foggy, he can't tell what it is.

A second later his book falls near his head, it's pages open, but Stephen can't make out anything. He looks over the page, yearning to be able to read the ending before he's gone.

He eyes are heavy, his chest hurting, he wants one last glace at the page. Then he sees it, the one line he can make out, 'A delicate thing like you will be fun to break, Peter', and the blood in his veins run cold. He said that once, to a boy, a boy in a blue sweater, whose blood had stained his shirt.

He's almost out when a thought crosses his mind. 'I don't remember a character in the book named Peter.'

Poor Stephen Strange, so absorbed in his books that he missed the world around him. What a shame that in the end all be had were printed words on a page.

. . .

Bucky arrived at school after Spring break, his heart and head just a heavy as before. He had been away for the entire week, his friend Sam inviting him on a trip out of state.

He kept his head down, focused on getting to class a making it through another day.

He was shocked to enter homeroom and find flowers on seven desks. He looked around trying to find answers when he over heard a conversation.

"Can you believe it?"

"They're all dead."

"Scott said that they were all accidents, but the way they died . . . and all during break, there's no way that all seven of them died by accident."

"Could it have been a suicide pack?"

"They all had good lives, why end it short?"

"I don't know man, but did you hear about Peter?"

The bell rang and The conversation ended as both students took their place in class.

Peter? Bucky's chest tightened. What about Peter? Did they find his body? His poor body broken and bloody, tear tracks down his soft delicate skin. Bucky never did know what they did with his body.

He was nearly over taken with guilt and pain, the beginning of tears prickling in the corner of his eyes.

"Hey there Bucky. I missed you."

Bucky froze, the air around him stilled, his heart nearly stoped before pounding loudly in his chest.

The boy walked in front took of him, took the seat before his own, say down, and turned to face him.

Peter was the same as before, but not. His soft brown curls framed his face, he rich brown eyes staring straight back at Bucky's own. His lips just a pink and pretty as before, the smile that rested on them kind but guarded.

The thing that had changed, wasn't his body, but the air around him. He wasn't as weak and small as he seemed before. The feeling of vulnerability gone, replaced with a strength Bucky never knew Peter possessed.

Bucky's hand reached out to touch the boy's cheek, stopping right before he touched him.

"Peter" the reverence in Bucky's voice was palpable.

Peter moved his cheek to Bucky's hand, eyes closed and a gentle breathe leaving him.

When Peter looked back at him, Bucky couldn't help but smile.

He should be afraid, scared, frightened by what Peter is, or what he can do. Not in this moment he feels nothing but peace.

One by one they all fell. Justice or Revenge? It doesn't matter, it's done now.

[legacyfragmented]

The people hath spoken. Time for me to just wordspew, I suppose. Forgive the gob if I do go on.

                 I. ZACK FAIR

         This is where we start, because this man will always be one of the greatest friends and mentors to Cloud, that he has ever had. Keep in mind that these are my thoughts and interpretation. They may differ from your own, and that IS ok.

         Cloud had a dream when he entered ShinRa and sought the coveted position as a member of SOLDIER. It was more than any ‘ Sephiroth is so cool, I want to be like him ! ’ type deal. More than his promise to Tifa that he would become a hero and save her, if she ever needed it. It was based off the fact that he wanted to prove his worth, to himself and everyone else. That he could mean something, BE something.          Be something more than the angry kid with no dad, who got into tussles and kept to himself.          His lack of progress in entering SOLDIER after he set out to Midgar was. . . a blow. It was. && though he was determined to rise up, make a name, it was a difficult task to manage.

             && then he met Zack.

         Due to Cloud being ostracised by his peers, he had never truly had a friend before. Even though he cared deeply for Tifa ( whichever way you spin it, he cared about her and her opinion. ) they had never gotten the chance to be close as kids or teens. But Zack and Cloud instantly connected over their “ backwater ” backgrounds and from there, a friendship took root.          Zack who took up Angeal's role of the mentor, the heart and soul of SOLDIER's pride. Zack who took Cloud under his wing as Angeal had done him. He believed in him. && that was something he had never really had before, either. Sure, yes, his mother knew he was brilliant, but that's his mother. A woman who had only her son left once her husband died, who worried about Cloud going off to chase his dreams on a whole other continent.          Cloud admired Zack's attitude and spirit. As Zack saw the potential in him, HE saw the hero in HIM. && unlike Sephiroth, an unknowable and untouchable force, Zack was there, telling him to ' hang in there ' on his dreams of SOLDIER. Giving him a hope that he scarcely felt before, and being an encouraging presence overall. I mean, he picked Cloud out of a lineup of Infantrymen and everythin'. Zack was a bruhv.

         That's all without mentioning how fraggin' hard he fought to protect a Mako-Poisoned Cloud on their journey from the Nibelheim ShinRa Mansion to just outside Midgar. That could be a post of it's own, but I shall save the space.

         Instead, let's jump right on those last hour or two. In the back of that lorry, Zack laid out a grand plan for the two of them. Mercenaries, they would be. Boring stuff, dangerous stuff. . . as long as the pay was right ! Poor Cloud though. Addled, dazed. He soaked it all up, though. Every word, including the need for money, how the price need be right. He took all that, as the Buster Sword was passed into his hands and Zack began to drift into the lifestream, and his fragmented mind twisted it as it did his memories. It was unavoidable, as in that state he was susceptible, and Zack was the person he trusted most after all that happened. Of course he latched onto that          Zack's death, I feel, was the final straw for what stability he had. Such that when he regained his bearings, he would not recall him or their friendship.          When he did though, he wasn't given much time to grieve proper, as he should have had ( and as Aerith should have been able to as well !!! ) as there was still the Planet to save and Sephiroth to defeat. Afterward, when they were left with the pieces to pick up and a world ravaged by the tyrants that once held their lives in but a palm. . . Cloud attempted to finally make good on Zack's dying words. To be his living legacy and live for them both. To live with honour.          But that was difficult. He had almost half a decade of his life taken from him and lost himself for months after he finally regained his freedom. In a way. . . he didn't know how to live in a world where he wasn't fighting for his life. && that too is a whole other post I WILL BE MAKING.

         Left with a mountain of guilt on his shoulders and people who loved him, but who he could not relate to as they moved on and he didn't, it was easy for Geostigma to alienate him all the more. He was dying, how could he carry on his best friend's name?

         Now we get to the scene which inspired this particular post.

         Listen when I say seeing Zack made me cry like mad. . . && still does.

         But to Cloud, it was most definitely so much more. Zack, who he had never been able to properly tell goodbye, to thank for all that he had done. For his friendship and unwavering faith. . . standing right behind him, as Aerith had hours before. Even in the afterlife, Zack had his back.          I'll address this in my post about her too ( look at me, planning ahead like a loon as if I won't take ages to do that. ) but Cloud didn't turn around for several reasons, but of course the two most important were that he was afraid––certain, even--that he would disappear like the spector of the past he was. &&. . . because he felt he failed to hold to their agreement. Sure, he became a mercenary and even, to some, a hero. . . but he didn't live or protect Aerith as was asked of him.          But it's undeniable that having Zack there to encourage him, as he always had, gave him the necessary boost to defeat Sephiroth's remnant once more. Not just that he could do it though, but that he knew that he could do it. Zack helped as much as the rest of AVALANCHE did when they boosted Cloud for the fight earlier against Bahamut SIN.          Then later, seeing Zack standing there ( looking all cool, the goof ) with Aerith. . . it helped too. To see him. And when they walked away, he felt like he finally had some sense of peace. They were alright. . . && they didn't blame him for things that he was now accepting were out of his hands. It was what he needed, really. A push only they could give, for him to forgive himself and truly start to live up to his promise.

         That. . . that is what my Cloud is doing. He's living for Zack, for Aerith. . . and even for himself. Maybe not as much as he should yet but, every step counts. Oh, he has his times. There's no way you come back from all that without having as many bad days as good, especially as you heal. && that. . . that too is something he's attempting. To heal. His mind is healed, Tifa say to that, but his heart and soul have yet to seal the cracks up and put up some plasters on the wounds he's been licking for years. But he knows he isn't alone now. He knows he needs to settle into something real, to put the sword down ( but always keep it within reach ) and find whatever happiness he can.          For Aerith and Zack, his mother, for everyone that died in Nibelheim, for the people that have died, the voiceless and nameless. . . he lives.          && more than anything. . . Cloud hopes he makes him proud. That he can be the person, the good one, Zack saw when he asked him ‘ We're friends. . . right Cloud ? ’

[irepookie]

Infinity

Summary: QUEEN AU where Roger (akaRow) is a teen single dad and aspiring rock star

Warnings: fluff fluff fluff and some cursing.

Words: 2090

I changed the names Cause I feel more comfortable writing it that way (idk why) but I could re-change them if that'd help you getting more into the story.

Rowan Queen: (tho you can imagine Ben as well. This is my take)

Chapter 1: I'm here

Written from his mother's POV, which gives us some insight on the family background and history as the first day of the rest of their lives unravels.

Gina Marie Queen (neé Thomas) had always been ahead of her time. She was never a fearful woman. Not for men anyway. She hadn't had a father -that alcoholic piece of shit was nothing close to that.-

And for all she knew, she hadn't had a husband either -another waste of space-. She had finally kicked him out hers and her son's life after 10 years of hell when that drunk asshole's rehearsal fits had made her lose the daughter she had been longing for since she could remember.

He could throw plates at her, and she'd fight back burning his beloved match tapes. Or intoxicate his food. Those were her favorite paybacks.

He could verbally abuse their son, and wake up with pink hair the next day. (Rowan's idea when he was 10)

But the night he had pushed her and she had broken waters at month number 5, that was it.

It should have ended earlier, she knew. Her unborn daughter shouldn't have had to suffer the consequences for Gina to finally throw his shit out the window and soak them in the Jack Daniels bottle he hid under his side of the bed and light them with the lighter he'd switch his bloody cigars.

But unfortunately that's what it had taken.

And she would have strangled him in his sleep if she had known Rowan would be taken care of while in jail. But she wasn't. And someone had to think of the rebellious trouble maker too.

And when her son -yes, she decided that rebellious trouble maker was, more or less, worthy of the title despite being the spitting image of the his father- became a father, Gina feared her granddaughter would have the same fate. Row had it in his genes and , as much she had tried to raise him as best as she was capable of, that fear never faded.

So when the phone rang

"Rowan Queen?"

""I'm his mother"

"I'm from the Hospital's maternity aisle. We call to inform you that his daughter's mom has disappeared after giving birth..."

That was all she needed to hear before dropping the phone and leaving it hanging upside down

"ROWAN EUGENE QUEEN! GET YOUR FUCKING ASS HERE THIS INSTANT!"

"I've got rehearsals with the band..."

"YOU GOT SOMEONE PREGNANT, YOU IDIOT??!"

"Me? No!"

"WELL THINK AGAIN!"

"Mum..."

"Just got a call from hospital saying your daughter's mother has disappeared after birth!!! And they called us!"

He was high school's infamous Playboy. Blonde, Blue Big eyes, and a charming smile. And on top of that, one of the four members of a wannabe rock band. The Hot Drummer, they call him .Gina knew. She didn't need to hear about his reputation to know the likelihood of him getting someone pregnant was high. But she had pictured it differently.

She grabbed him by the wrist and pulled, but he didn't move. He kept staring at nowhere.

"Rowan!!!"

No reaction.

She had to slap his cheek in order to get him out his shock

"What do you want?!"

"We're going to hospital, right now"

"What? Why?"

"To work this shit out!!"

"But we have to rehearse"

"Fuck that shit Rowan! They've just told us you got someone pregnant and she run off! That's the most important thing right now so get in that this instance!!"

He did as told. It was a tense car ride. And Gina remembered Elsa. Her baby girl. And how for her father's fault she wasn't there.

"So what now?" Row asked

"We're putting her up for adoption, unless they can contact the mother, although I don't think she should have a say. But if you're the so called father and your name is in the file, we can leave your part signed and then go home."

"Oh"

Gina thought she caught a hint of disappointment in his voice.

It had to be her imagination. Disappointment over what? Missing the wonderful experience of being a teen dad? Ha.

He did look thoughtful. He hadn't even turned on the radio.

Something was off.

But she figured he'd just want to get this whole thing over with, and that he'd sign her over to a better family. As anyone with minimum common sense would

Right?

Then, as they waited for the application, he asked if he could see her.

Her answer was immediate "No"

"Why?"

"How come Why? Why on Earth would you want to see her?"

"Well I'm here. You've been freaking out , and freaking me out as well. Might as well see who this fuss is about"

"A baby. That's it. You don't need to see one. They all look the same. Small, Wrinkly, like a large prune. There you have it"

"Well I wanna see my... That small wrinkled prune"

Damn. He had said <<mine>>. He already considered her his.

Gina changed her strategy.

"Your name is on the certificate, right. But that means nothing"

"Why would it be there otherwise?""

"A mistake. Or maybe the mother just wants to tangle you up."

"The mother's gone"

"Yes. For now. It's called Baby Blues, and when it's gone She'll have you exactly where she wants to. Because I'm guessing she won't be no straight A student either, and you'll have to sustain them both -if you ever make it to college- and you'll end up getting married, and maybe you don't even love her, but divorce is even more tedious than getting married. That's why I've Never done it. So you'll both be stuck as cashiers in whatever low cost store, and then she'll confess that you were her high school crush but that the kid is actually her ex boyfriend's and then you'll throw a fit, and you'll get in a fight and you'll end up grabbing whatever is on your reach to hit whoever's on your reach...."

"Wait mom. I just... I just wanna see her." Row cut her off " Whoever the fuck she may actually be, I'm the one who's here. And I ain't signing anything without knowing who I'm making decisions for. That's all. I just want to see. I don't even want to touch her or whatever. Just knowing who's the reason I had to turn the boys down today. Then I'll sign the paper and we'll go home."

"She's in the NICU anyway. Doubt they'll let you in"

"What's NICU?" Gina caught genuine concern in his voice.

"Nothing bad." She reassured.

They handed the files, and she took them "I'll fill them"

She got through the first page, and he was gone.

Shit. That stubborn bastard.

She didn't want him to be a father. He was 19 for fucks shake. Had never had one of his own. He had only moved out a couple months ago. Nothing lasted much for him. Wether it was a girlfriend, a job, clothes... His longest pet had reached one year alive. And he couldn't go long without getting injured

Not even his drum kit had survived the move, and was litterally patched up. She'd consider herself guilty of murder if she allowed a baby to be on that list. Not to mention the alternative was that she'd be the one, sooner or later, to take over. Because he was never patient and would stress too much -if he didn't lose interest first- or get fed up and cause her shaken Baby syndrome. And just as she was too young to be a grandmother, she was too old to raise a second kid.

So she stormed inside the NICU aisle ready to get him out of there. And what she saw was quite breathtaking. The look in his eyes was priceless: such fondness and marvel... Only comparable to when he had first seen that red Ludwig drum set through the glass of the local music store.

"I've never seen something so awesome in my life!" He had said.

They had never been able to afford it. He had tried to get a job after school, to save up everything. But it hadn't been enough. And he'd go everyday to that street, and just stare at the shiny wonderful kit for hours, hands on the glass, knowing that the likelihood of ever owning it was almost non existent.

He ended up making acquaintance with the owner. They tried to bargain for it, but his lowest price was way too high for them. He did get to play it once tho, and it was an undescribable experience. Murray, the owner, let him give it a try out of pity when someone else bought it, as a farewell. And had never seen anything like it again.

Now this baby was, technically, his -regardless of what biology could say- and he was about to give it away.

Gina did know on first hand it was, having been a volunteer on midwife assistance with her aunt. And 10/10 woman who swore to never want anything to do with their child changed their minds as soon as they laid eyes on them. Only those who really followed through -take it away, I don't wanna see it- walked out there with empty arms.

Now Row was looking at that baby ad if she was a treasure, but that meant nothing in the long term. His father had done something similar to Elsa's sonogram.

Her poor little girl. So young.

So helpless. She had been so naive thinking he would ever change.

But she wasn't gonna make that mistake again. She loved her son, but he really wasn't good at anger management.

She couldn't expose another innocent child to such danger.

"Rowan, come here now. You've seen her. Got what you wanted. Met her. Now let's get this over with"

His hand was resting on the top of the incubators glass, even if he had unglued his eyes from the tiny being inside and nailed on her now, as if he had been staring at the sun for a long while and was now blinded.

"Why the hurry?"

Was she hearing correctly?

"How come Why the hurry? Because we both have things to do"

"I've already cancelled the one plan I had..."

"Well I still have an errand to get done."

He didn't reply, eyes back on the child

"Rowan" she approached him, making sure not to look at the kid. "Rowan Eugene Queen, look at me when I'm talking to you" she ordered in a strict tone

"What?"

"Papers. Signature. Now"

"I'm thinking about it"

"Thinking about...?! Thinking about what? What's there to think? Sign these and we'll go home, and we'll never have to look back at this! Nobody has to know."

"And what about the raisin?"

"The what?"

"Her. What about her?"

"She'll be fine. Adopting couples love newborns. She'll go to a fit, nice marriage and will be very happy. And we'll resume our lives"

"And I'll never see her again?"

"Why do you care?"

He just shrugged and turned his attention back to her. Gina watched him watch her. Goddamn. She was losing him.

"Are you the father?" A nurse asked, walking towards.

*Don't say it. Don't say it. Don't say it*

Gina prayed.

"I suppose I am" He said it so naturally, with such a bright genuine smile that Gina almost forgot how critical those words were.

"Well, I'm Callie, and I'm on charge tonight. Congratulations, Mr... Oh, Queen." Her eyes widened When reading the tag on the incubator. "We're glad at least someone's here"

"Yea, well..." He scratched the back of his head nervously

"Don't worry. Her mom will get over it." She turned to Gina "You must be Gran..."

"No I'm not" Gina snapped harshly before she could finish the sentence "We were leaving"

"We were not"

"Rowan, I will not repeat it. Sign those bloody papers and get your ass back in the car"

"What if I don't want to?"

"This is serious! There's no other way!"

"Yes there is!"

"You can't be serious!" What 19 year old would ever choose this?

"Well I am"

"You don't even know what serious means! You have no sense of responsibility! You've never finished anything you've ever started!"

"Maybe I want to change! Maybe I can grow up if you stop pestering the shit outta me day In day out! This is not your decision!"

"I'm not letting you do this Row!"

"Then go! Leave me the fuck alone and stop getting in my way!"

Before Gina could answer, a small cry came from the incubator.

And she found herself walking backwards.

It was right she couldn't stop him but she wasn't gonna take part on it.

So she turned around and left, as the nurse explained Row how to hold his newborn daughter.

"You're not gonna break her, I promise. You'll do fine. Because you're here. Just because you're here I know you're gonna be a great dad. You already are" Callie said, putting his trembling arms on the correct position before lifting the small white bundle out the incubator.

They usually didn't do it unless it was necessary for a feed or a change, but she thought this was even more important: they had to meet each other properly: The little one needed to hold on to someone after being abandoned. And there was something in the young boy's eyes that told her he needed just the same.

So with a reassuring smile Callie placed her on Rowan's arms, who brought her closer to his chest by instinct, a small smile already on his lips as he took in her features.

She was gorgeous. And he didn't know why, but he found her to be the most perfect thing he had ever seen. He instantly knew he was gonna protect that wrinkled prune at all costs.

"Hey there, lil'raisin. I'm..." He swallowed the lump in his throat "I'm your Dad and... I'm here now."

🎶🎶🎶🎶🎶🎶

Hope you guys liked it

It's my first fic on Tumblr so I still don't have the formatting completely handled and my phone won't let me select all the paragraphs at once to put it all in regular font.

Let me know what you think. Thank you all!!😍😍😍😍

~Pookie

[deiupvote]

It's been a while since I've been able to update, I'm sorry if this post is as long as my prior one. Alot has happened in the last few months and I haven't been able to post information about it until now. It's nearly impossible to explain the situation without a long backstory so you'd have to have seen my prior post. I'll try to give a short summary here.https://ift.tt/2A6qbhq I spent almost 20 years living with my mother. I have 3 younger siblings. 16 of those years I suffered through abuse. Had her hold a knife to my neck, kicked me down the stairs frequently, beaten me with extension cords/bats/fists/chairs/belts/etc, beaten me unconscious & bloody countless times, verbally abusive aka telling me i was worthless and how she couldn't stand me or how I looked like my dad daily. I lost count of how many times I woke up to heavy closed fist punches to the face at like 3am on school days because the dishes weren't washed or I didn't fold her laundry or whatever and then being forced to do chores until I went to school. Teachers weren't helpful. Family turned a blind eye. My dad wasn't around. This wasn't once in a while. This was everyday. I didn't have much freedom as she rarely let me leave the house (Deadbolt lock on the front door and I wasnt allowed to have keys) or get a few hours of reprieve outside of school where I did horribly because the only thing I was interested in was people liking me instead of actual schoolwork. I've called the police on her a total about 2 times. She never got in trouble and the police generally believed her over me and she'd dismiss all my allegations. I was a really skinny kid, I was not a threat and I couldn't defend myself. Either way, I hated violence so I never raised a hand to her or took it out on anyone else. My only reprieve was all the ways I sabotaged her food, the satisfaction of making eye contact as she ate off of a spoon I rubbed between my buttcheeks or when she enjoyed a cup of my special home brew lipton tea. Lots of little malicious compliances which usually ended with punishment.It was just her and I (my older sister was taken away very early) until I hit my teens when my younger siblings were born (not all at the same time). She didn't beat them as bad and treated them fairly better. I was alone for most of it. I didn't really connect with them because they were always around her and I tried to minimize the time spent around my Mother when I hit my teens and after when I started having slightly more freedom. After abusing me for years then carrying on to abuse my siblings, lying to me about having a place to live if I went to college, countless other reasons, and her literally laughing at me when I told her I was homeless.. This is after I explained how it's been hard for me and how the abuse affected me. She's never owned up it. Never apologized. Nothing. I was done. I decided I was going to ruin her life. Regardless of whether it makes me a bad person or not. I had photos of my own bruises/cuts/etc saved from YEARS with my mother. My little sister sent me a few via social media. I compiled it all and went to CPS. They went with police to do a check and coincidentally got there while my mother was beating my sister. Cue an emergency removal and her losing her kids. I reached out to her job and made them aware she lied about her degree (I was the one who wrote all her resumes and etc). She lost her $75k+ salary job days later and got blacklisted. I even deleted every single gmail account and etc I made for her just because fuck her.But as this is an update and not a repost of how trash my past was, I'll try not to repeat myself too much.UpdateI'll give an update on me personally first. My camera was stolen and instead of trying to get another one, I decided to take a break from photography. I appreciate all of the support you guys gave me after my first post. It's been extremely hard, taking pictures was the only thing I really did that helped me feel okay but I'm learning to build resilience. In the mean time, I swallowed my pride and moved into a homeless shelter in my city specifically for people with jobs & a savings. I'll be able to continue saving while I work on bettering myself as a person. I created an action plan and mapped out all my goals and how I want to achieve them. Up until recently, I wasn't even planning on being alive. Sorry if that's too dark. I honestly always had these thoughts wishing my mother would have finished the job with me and made life easier. But as of late, I'm becoming more and more curious of what I'm capable of if I gave myself the chance. I've been able to visit my younger siblings and have gotten to know my little sister abit better because of the experience. I feel like a horrible person for admitting I still feel nothing for them or really anyone, but I won't let my feelings get in the way of the promise I made to myself or them. I've also only drank 3 times in the last 4 months compared to every other day in the past, which isn't great but its a change.My younger siblings are still with CPS but I can't go into detail. My mother was supposed to go to a hearing to get them back but things got complicated (important). My mothers best friend's son (who I've known 8yrs) does his best to relay all the shit my mother tells her while they talk on the phone all day. Things had gotten worse for her. She hasn't been keeping up with her mortgage payments. Her fiance, my youngest siblings dad, is no longer her fiance anymore and is trying to file for custody. I heard she was a wreck then went ghost but it didn't make me feel better. There weren't supposed to be any winners. Honestly, I wasn't even going to update. I initially just wanted to tell someone for once but one thing changed my mind. Something I was not expecting months after I set this all in motion. A phone call from my mother. In the past seeing her calls, even after movingg out, would set me on edge but that hasn't been the case lately. It was just another thing that happened. Just another event. Meaningless but at the same time... She always had my number but NEVER reached out. Even when things first started going to shit, I doubt she even gave me a second thought. But I'm sure you're all curious to know what was said.My mother is gone. A few weeks after my post, the state I'm in brought felony charges up against her. She left the country shortly after and went to her home country in South America. I have no idea how she was even allowed to leave but they didn't take her passport. She avoided specifics on that part. She mentioned staying with a family friend temporarily and tried to frame it as a short vacation. She didn't even start off with a hello, she started the conversation by ordering me to go somewhere quiet before launching into a sob story about how things have been going for her. This is after months of no contact. After laughing at me for being homeless and denying she ever abused me months ago. Just yammering away like it was nothing but I let her talk. It was surreal. I felt so cold just listening to her talk. It was like talking to a stranger. She mentions losing out on "so much money" and how she doesn't know how all it happened and then finally she hits the topic dujour.Cue her bringing up my little sister and the night of the emergency removal. She starts complaining about how she misses my little sister and brothers, mentions something about how it messes up tax season?, and then she had the audacity to start trying to convince me that I should go talk to the caseworkers for her to back up her claim that " she never abused them or me and I should know that..." She said that to me. After everything. Of all people. 9 minutes into the conversation. Like nothing ever happened. But it wasn't anything new. Of course I cut her off but at that point my mind was already made up. I asked her if she remembered when I used to make iced tea for her all those years. She was a little thrown off but said yes. I paused for a few seconds before slowly telling her in detail about all the ways i sabotaged her lipton iced tea. She tried interrupt me once but I didn't stop talking. I told her about how I'd always put too much sugar and she'd never taste it and keep drinking more which was why I always insisted. There was just silence on the phone but I know she was listening. I told her waiting until after dinner when I got home from school to shower so I could rub her spoons between my buttcheeks for maximum damage and how I'd mix it into her food to mask it. At this point I'm not even sure she's listening anymore but im still describing specific days I remember doing it that I know she would remember. She finally LOUDLY interrupts me screaming at me disgusting evil things. She cursed me the way she used to back in the days when shed be standing over me with an extension cord beating the skin off of me when I was younger. She's blaming me for ruining her life and how she wish she had a better child (All without knowing that I directly caused the destruction of her current life though she's speaking about the past). I just let her waste her breath. She couldn't touch me or my siblings. It only lasted a few seconds. Now I remember spending years daydreaming of all things I'd say to my mother if I had the chance but I just bottled it up with all my other baggage and kept trying to exist. A lot of people from my original post also gave me some ideas.When she finally shut her mouth I calmly told her "Look Mom, You don't know what abuse is and honestly its your own fucking fault this is all happening to you. Also, my bad for pissing in your iced tea." Then I just hung up the phone and blocked her number. That was the last day I drank. I haven't talked to her since. I'm not sure she's aware (or maybe she is) how bad of an idea it was to leave the country with all this going down, even if it was for a few weeks. At this point im done with her. I don't want an apology. I just want to move forward and be a better person. I know that's hard to believe after everything I just told you but it's the truth. I try my best to put as much positivity into the world and share it with the people around me as much as possible. But fuck her. I don't know if she knows it was me but I didn't tell her. I'm sure she can guess though if she really tried. Anyways.. That's my revenge. It's still actively fucking her life up but im not taking any active part in it. I wish it wasn't like this. I wish I had a real family that loved me and I knew how to love back the right way. I wish I had a real relationship with my mother and none of those things happened. I wish I could have turned out like one of the happy people in the world but I can spend spend all day wishing. Sorry for the super long post. This is my last update. Wish me luck next year.TL;DR - My mother abused me for most of my life. I had to drop out of college and support myself after she basically drove me to homelessness. She laughs at me about me being homeless and denies abuse. So I ruined her life by reporting the abuse my siblings and I dealt with resulting in an emergency removal by CPS & her getting criminal charges, exposing her lies to her job which she lost, putting her in a situation that ruined her engagement, and ultimately causing her to flee the country which might result in even worse charges if/when she comes back. via /r/ProRevenge