#Which is just stressful counting with extra string

[elodieunderglass]

All the delightful eggs for Killie posts have been a great motivator for me finally finishing the second sleeve on my sweater and weaving in all those dreaded ends.

This is SO beautiful, I wish I’d made it! GOD the existential horror of The Second Sleeve, let alone the Weaving In Of The Ends. Christ almighty when does it end.

I see you there with your nice even stitches and tension around the colour work, that’s really beautifully done and you should feel very proud.

[cyberjam]

ATSV HEADCANON: they have a crush on you . . . ☆

warnings - none really, super fluffy and adorable :), semi-proof read so i apologize for grammatical errors if there are any! no use of name or y/n, gender-neutral reader!

word count - 2.1k

main masterlist <3

☆ . . . miles morales

I imagine you two already being well-acquainted friends with each other once he realized his feelings for you. For quite some time he had a crush on gwen but now his heart strings are pulling him towards you, so he's struggling when it comes to addressing his feelings.

If you're in the same room as Miles, he will stare. Any conversation that he was having before is long forgotten and all that's on his mind is you.

Miles doesn't need to study, he's one of the top students in school. But he continues to go on study dates with you because he likes being in your presence and sharing his headphones with you while eating yummy pastries.

He has an entire journal dedicated to you. Said journal includes: small journal entries of his day with you, little quotes of the funny/cute things you've said that stuck with him throughout the day, candid drawings of you that he created whenever you two hung out, cute sketches of you and him stargazing or slow-dancing together (and other secret drawings of him saving you as spider-man and cradling your body in his big strong arms but we won't get into that...)

Miles really can't get enough of you. He laughs extra loud at your jokes even if they aren't funny, his heartbeat quickens at the mention of your name, he'll offer you his jacket even if you don't need it, he always smiles when something reminds him of you, he'll share his headphones with you and shyly ask if you and him can make a "study playlist" (he listens to it at night while drawing you), and overall is just madly in love with you.

He wants to be with you more than anything, he's just struggling to find the right time to ask you. <3

"Hey, don't touch that! It's- No! It's not a diary, it's just...secret."

☆ . . . gwen stacy

She's pretty awkward herself. You were assigned to be partners for a project that would play a big part in your final grade, she came off slightly cold and seemed to be annoyed at your presence which made your relationship start off rocky. In reality she was just stressed, juggling her spider duties, getting kicked out of her house, and then school on top of that, it was just a lot. But when you made the effort to plan things and work around her busy schedule (that you didn't really know anything about) she started to become grateful for you.

Your parents welcomed her kindly each time she came over to study and whenever she would leave she was happy with a full belly and a sore face from smiling and laughing with you all night. The project was supposed to be done by the end of the semester but you and gwen were able to finish it the first month you got it. That didn't stop her bi-weekly visits, that then turned weekly, until she was suddenly walking home with you everyday, from and to school.

She likes to compare hands, shoes, and height just to see the difference in sizes. On walks back from school she'll give you a piggyback ride if you ask nicely. She also likes laying her head in your lap, if you run your fingers through her hair she'd be fast-asleep within 5 minutes.

You and her tend to share your oversized clothes together, You always wash her jackets/sweaters after you wear them, which she absolutely loves. She's fallen asleep curled up in your hoodie, inhaling the scent and listening to whatever song you rambled about the previous morning on repeat until she finally asks you to just make her a playlist. Hobie definitely knows about you, only because she slipped up by saying too much.

She enjoys staying over your house during rainy days. She tends to tense up whenever you're watching tv together on your bed and your head falls on her shoulder. During missions in other spider-verses gwen has taken little souvenirs from different worlds and given them to you, she always does it in a nonchalant way as if she wasn't grinning ear to ear on her way back, excited to see how you'd react.

You don't have sleepovers often but when you do they always seem more intimate than your usual hangouts. When you wake up and see gwen flustered on the other side of the bed you never understand why, not knowing that when you were fast asleep she woke up cuddled into you, nuzzling her body into yours.

"I-uhm. I-uh just had a weird dream. Nothing to worry about, heh.."

☆ . . . pavitr prabhakar

It's very obvious he has a crush on you, it might as well be written on his forehead. He follows you around like a lost puppy. He's constantly offering to carry your books, opening doors for you, paying for your snacks, and even giving you hand massages when you've been writing an essay for too long. He's just completely whipped for you and you're not even dating (yet).

You were a transfer student and he was assigned to show you around Mumbai. He found himself getting giddy at your cute reactions to the different sights he took you to. He adored how you were filled with so much curiosity and wonder, the awestruck look in your eyes when you saw the pretty lights at night and just how genuinely excited you seemed to stay and explore Mumbai. Since then, he's been glued to your side.

He's such a gentleman, you can tell he was raised right. Whenever you're talking his full attention is on you, nobody else matters in this moment but you. He'll even get a bit upset if someone cuts you off, ignoring whatever they're saying and urging you to continue. His legs feel wobbly around you, he gets dizzy at the sight of you, and he feels like he's floating whenever you smile at him.

There have been multiple occasions where you've caught him staring at you, depending on how he feels that day he'll either smirk and gently wave or quickly turn away with a blush on his face. He gushes about you to Hobie and Miles all of the time. They know so much about you and they've never even met you.

A true romantic. He buys you a singular flower one week out of the day, always explaining the meaning and where they originate from. (all of them are a variation of romance/love)

He tends to lean into you whenever you speak. More than one person has pointed out that you both tend to mirror each other's actions. He's feigning for your touch more than anything, a simple brush of your shoulders and he's full on putty in your hands.

He won't outright confront you when he figures out you like him, instead he'll invite you on a nightly walk. Taking you up to a rooftop with a gorgeous view, and gently resting his jacket on your shoulders. You'll sit for a while enjoying the scenery before he turns to you and says...

"a person as beautiful as yourself shouldn't wander this world alone.."

☆ . . . hobie brown

What a nightmare. He is constantly teasing and flirting with you. Always doubling over in laughter when he sees you get all flustered and the words you so badly wanna spew at him get stuck in your throat.

I imagine you both to be spider-people, you're a little more stuck-up than he is which is why he likes to tease you so much. Little by little your reactions fueled something deeper in him. He no-longer found himself flirting with you because he liked seeing how aggravated he could get you but because that was his way of approaching you and saying all of the things he wanted to while being able to play it off as a joke.

Besides teasing you relentlessly, he can be really caring and attentive to you when he wants to be. If you're in the medic he'll stop by pretty often to make sure you're okay. The only reason you found out is because you woke up to him fast asleep next to your bedside, feet propped on your bed and his vest laid across his torso like a blanket.

He'll eat the foods on your plate that you don't like. If you fall asleep he'll lay his vest onto your body and even move your position if it looks uncomfortable. If he senses danger before you he'll move you of the way as fast as he possibly can, but if he's not close enough he'll give you a heads up before anyone else. He tends to stare at you sometimes, always smiling gently to himself.

When you two get closer as friends he'll play any song on his guitar if you ask him nicely. He'll even give you lessons if you really want them. Carefully throwing his guitar over your torso, he brings his much larger hands to yours. You can feel his chest against your back, and the waves of his warm breath on your neck as he teaches you how to play. He'll also let you wear his jacket, saying it looks better on you than him. He might let you keep it, only in exchange for one of your jackets. (he sleeps with your jacket on, it makes him feel close to you.)

Hobie often checks up on you during missions, sometimes saying teasing phrases to get you riled up but mostly to make sure you're holding up okay. "you alright there, peaches? you took quite the hit."

Once he finds out you like him, he eases up on the teasing, but he doesn't refrain from dropping subtle hints of his knowingness that you like him. He's just waiting for you to finally say something.

"Yknow, if i ain't know any better i'd say you were doing this 'cause you like me."

☆ . . . miguel o' hara

You worked beside him in Alchemax, the two of you were assigned as partners. At first he didn't care much for you, simply telling you to stay out of his way and that he didn't need any help, but after Lyla practically forced him to be a cordial lab partner and work with you, he started to take a liking towards you. Sadly, it took months for him to tolerate you and even longer for him to like you.

Although he was quite stuck-up and practically seemed on edge most of the time, you were able to break through those confined walls and have a comfortable-playful work relationship with him. Every-time you made a joke or a light quip about his attitude he'd always respond with sarcasm, still not being able to hide the tiny smile that graced his face at your foolish acts.

He always runs his projects by you before submitting them. (and then lyla to triple check) He'll stop by and pick up empanadas from his favorite store, always boasting about how it's the best in Nueva York and you'll never taste anything better. Eventually he brings in a hefty share of empanadas that you two share over lunch time, your conversation flowing naturally without the teasing but with a fluffier feeling flowing through the air.

He pretends to be annoyed when he catches you over-working but he's genuinely worried for you. Always shaking his head in a disapproving way when he finds you fast asleep on your desk, papers scattered, and drool falling past your lips. Quietly scolding you in spanish before throwing his lab coat over your shoulders and organizing your papers neatly.

He tends to act unbothered when you do something that shows you care for him but in reality it makes his heart stutter and his stomach feel all loopy. He hates it because it makes him feel like a middle-schooler when they get their first crush but another part of him absolutely adores it and his main motivation to get up to go to work in the morning is you, although he'll never admit it.

If a co-worker is ever rude to you he will be the first to defend you, not hesitating to get in their face with a nasty scowl painting his features. On Friday's he made it his personal mission to walk you home, you two slowly walk side-by-side, quietly laughing to yourselves as you reminisce on lab accidents and old memories. There's a slight gleam in his eyes when you make it to your apartment door. He turns to you almost hesitantly, before stepping closer to you. He whispers a question, so quiet and soft you almost wouldn't be able to hear it.

"Can I kiss you?"

omg i hope you guys liked it! requests are still open btw and thank you for reading! <3

likes, reblogs, and comments are always appreciated <33

[illbegottenfaith]

bad day - theo nott x reader

a visit from your boyfriend perks you up even on the most frustrating of days

a/n - my first theo nott fic! I’ve written for other fandom(s) so this was a nice change, hope you enjoy :

tropes/warnings - established relationship, a pet name here or there, nothing overwhelming, fluff, comfort, nothing 18+ but a brief alluding to it

word count - 1k

“Off.”

As a general rule of thumb, you were typically the clingier half of your relationship with Theo. There was something about the feel of his skin against yours and the way his touch grounded you that made you feel safe and cared for in ways you were still too embarrassed to express out loud. Theo was always happy to indulge, casually draping an arm across your shoulders and rubbing soothing circles on your shoulder.

However, like all rules, it came with its exception - particularly, when you were studying. You needed to focus on your work, and that wasn’t exactly possible with the delicious warmth of Theo pressed against your back or hip. For the most part, he stayed well away when you needed him to, but something about the adrenaline of Quidditch practice made him extra excitable. Which was how you found yourself pouring over a hellish Charms essay in the Slytherin common room late one night, when you felt a pair of strong arms wrap around your middle and a familiar weight rest in the crook of your neck.

“Theo, I mean it,” you whined as he slid into the seat next to yours, refusing to relinquish his hold on you, effortlessly dragging you onto his lap. Your irritation evaporated at the sight of his boyish blue eyes and his sloping smile. It was a problem, really, how you could never stay mad at him. Merlin knows his ego is bad enough as it is.

“Hey, doll.” His nose nudged yours and you finally relented, wrapping an arm around his neck as he kissed you. His face felt cool against your warm forehead, and he smelt pleasantly of some non-descript yet refreshing soap. 

“My neck is killing me,” you mumbled against his lips as you broke apart. Theo leaned back to get a better look at your wan face, distractedly running a hand down your spine.

“Have you had dinner yet?”

“Yes,” you frowned, “with you. Remember?”

Theo stared at you blankly. “Y/N. I’ve been at Quidditch practice for the past four hours.”

“What are you talking about? We had dinner, then we came up to the common room, and it was, y’know, freezing, and I said I needed to buy more fleece-lined tights, and you started saying something about liking me best without any tights, but then those fifth-years started wrestling each other over that game of -“

“- Gobstones?”

“Exactly!”

“Babe, that was last Thursday.”

Your face fell. “…it was. Merlin.” Theo watched, amused, as you let out a string of curses under your breath as you flipped through your planner, scowling. “It’s this stupid Charms essay that’s doing me in. I haven’t had my head on straight all week. Remember when I wore my earmuffs to breakfast on Tuesday?”

“Mhm.”

“Made a proper arse of myself at 8 in the morning. And I genuinely thought I saw you just an hour ago. I don’t know what came over me.” 

“I didn’t know I was so forgettable of a boyfriend,” Theo teased, as you buried your face into your hands. 

“Stop. I feel awful enough already,” came your muffled voice. Laughing, he took your hands in his own, his features softening at the exhausted look on your face.

“Rough day, baby?” You groaned, burying your face into his chest as he wrapped his other arm around you. Before meeting Theo, you took pride in how fiercely independent you were. Even now, you were more than capable of handling your daily stresses just as well as the next guy, but you still had the tendency of being tightly wound more often than not, and sometimes it just felt nice to have someone hold you while you cried about how awful life was. No one could help you or get you to decompress the way Theo did.

“Rough week, more like,” you mumbled into his collarbone. He hummed sympathetically, hand still running up and down your spine.

“You didn’t say a word.”

“It could have been worse. I thought I’d just…you know. Deal.”

You could hear the amused lilt to his voice. “Deal?”

“Deal with it. On my own, I mean.”

His hold on you tightened a fraction. “Have dinner with me.”

“Didn’t you eat before practice?”

“Hm. Have supper with me.”

“Theo.”

“What?”

You sighed. You were never one to turn in an assignment late but, Merlin - he didn’t make things easy for you. 

“I really need to get this essay done.”

“So you’ll get it done. After supper. I could take a look at it for you. Or your neck. Or both.”

You snorted. “Yeah, sure, because a distraction is just what I need now. You don’t even take N.E.W.T level Charms.”

“So you find me distracting?”

You pressed your lips together, biting the inside of your cheek. “Let me put it this way. If I, um, ‘have supper’ with you now, this essay will not reach Flitwick’s desk by 10 am tomorrow.”

Theo didn't look too happy about anything you were saying. “So what do you want me to do?”

You fought the urge to roll your eyes. Like any other guy, Theo could only sympathise for so long before he was bursting with advice or solutions. You glanced at the clock, getting the distinct impression that he was valiantly trying to stifle a yawn. 

“Go, leave, shoo. Get some rest, read a book, start a fight with some fifth-years, I don’t know. I just need to bully myself into finishing this. I’ll see you in the morning.”

“But I don’t want to start a fight with some sticky-fingered Gobstones-playing fifth-years.”

Still, he reluctantly slid you off his lap, pressing a kiss to your forehead before briefly disappearing. He returned with a huge, ancient book whose weathered cover seemed somewhat related to Potions. He arched an eyebrow as you made a face at it.

“What’s that?”

“What’s that?” You shot back, looking greatly repulsed by the gnarly volume.

“Some light bedtime reading material,” he quipped. You watched his face nervously, the tell-tale signs of fatigue knitted into the creases of his achingly beautiful face.

“I mean it, Teddy. You really should go to bed.”

“Can’t. I’ve got a date in an hour.”

“Do you?”

“Yeah. I’m taking this really pretty girl out for supper.”

You rolled your eyes as Theo settled into his seat, cracking the disfigured tome open.

“Smooth-talker.”

[manicmanuscription]

Technicalities

PolySJM Week: Day One

Prompt: Whose Court Is It Anyways?

Pairings: Eris / Azriel / Fem OC

Summary: Trying to balance a fresh mating bond is hard, even harder when Enora wants to settle down and live her life but her two mates can’t stand each other.

Word Count: 1588

Tags: Angst, Fluff, Arguring, Make-up sex mentioned.

PolySJM Week 2025 Masterlist | Acotar Masterlist

A/N: This went absolutely in a different direction I was going but hey here we are. Happy Poly Week!

Aiding and Abetting traitors or anyone outside of your own court for harmful purposes was treason. 

Trading illegal information with another court was treason. 

Harboring criminals and spies was. treason. 

The Winter Court’s lawbook didn’t technically say anything about hiding The High Lord of Autumn and the Night Court’s spymaster in my bedroom and technically I didn’t aid them, share any sensitive information or harbor any spies but I was pretty sure it was still treason or at least toeing the line. 

Especially since my brother had no. fucking. clue. 

God help us all if he somehow found out about it. Kallias despised the Night Court, and he thinks Eris is a bumbling shit-for-brains dickhead. 

Paranoia about my brother finding out about the two popular political frenemies in my room, at nearly three am, had me straightening my spine. 

“Be quiet.” I snapped for the millionth time as Eris and Azriel were at each other’s throats. Again.

Gods as if this mate bond wasn’t already a political nightmare I had to be mated to two people who loathed each other more than anyone else on the face of this planet. 

They didn’t even hear me over the sound of their bickering -for a spymaster and high lord you’d really think they’d be more mindful about committing semi-treasonous behaviour- and I huffed out an annoyed breath grabbing Azriel’s wrist as his hand moved towards his blade and tugged him away from the red-headed male  

I stepped in between them, giving them an equally harsh glare. “How many times do I have to tell you to be fucking quiet! Do you want this whole damn castle to hear you?” I whisper hissed, rubbing my temples. 

Our love story wasn’t a romantic, soft and gentle one. No, in fact it had been blades, sharp tongues, death threats and blood. It had been attacks and countermoves. All in the name of destroying each other and protecting our respective court’s. 

But eventually I got over my distrust, and so did they. My relationship’s with them slowly blossomed into something beautiful, but it happened singularly. One on one.

Because no matter how much I tried, Eris and Azriel were fine sharing me (after a lot of work and scheduling) but in no world would they ever be in a relationship with each other. 

They hadn’t even acknowledged the golden string tying them together. Unless it involves me or trying to kill each other they simply weren’t interested. 

It hurt to say the least and I was tired. Tired of being dragged halfway across the continent because they refused to have date nights together, tired of all the constant traveling, the lying to my friends and family and worst of all I was tired of them making this mateship -something I’d dreamed of and fantasized about, something that was supposed to be beautiful and sacred- a chore. 

I already have too many chores. I’m Kallias’ emissary and advisor, a princess, and now a soon to be aunt. I didn’t need this extra stress in my life, which I had told them, deciding it was time for us to just pick a place to live and settle down together so I could take some burden off my plate. 

But because I had made the naive mistake of trusting them to act like adults and pick the best spot for me to live -I’d hoped they would overcome their grievances and choose a place and court all together- and because The Mother said nothing can ever be easy for me, obviously that statement turned into a midnight tryst in my chambers where my mates are currently fighting tooth and nail for the spot. Azriel want’s it to be his court and naturally Eris wants it to be his. 

“I’m sorry love.” Azriel spoke, softening his voice and pulling me out of my thoughts he quickly pressed a soft kiss to my cheek as he turned the wrist I was carrying and now cradled my hand to his muscled chest. Eris’ eyes blazed at that and quickly pressed a kiss to my other cheek, brushing a piece of my snow white hair behind my ear. “I’m sorry too sweetheart.” He mumbled, we’re still working on his ability to apologize to others. If I hadn’t felt his pang of guilt through the bond I’d assumed he’d only done it because Azriel had. 

“It’s the middle of the night if my brother catches either of you in here. We’re all dead.” I emphasized the last part. My eavesdropper-protectant charms had broken nearly a week ago and I’d been too damn busy to fix them. 

“You’re right Enora, I apologize for my part.” Eris started.

“Thank you-”  

“Azriel, However? For a spymaster you’d think he’d mastered the necessary skills to be silent by now. I’ve always suspected you were incompetent but now I can prove it.” 

“I don’t need proof to know you’re an egotistical bastard who runs his court with a fresh manicure every week.”

Oh for the love of gods. 

They were arguing for a few more minutes. Their hushed tones lasting all of thirty seconds. I rubbed at the headache building behind my eyes, my pleas for quiet going unanswered until I finally snapped. 

“All right. That’s it.” I whisper-yelled. Glancing at the door as a quick safety measure before ensuring my mates eyes were on me. “I. Am. Done. With all of it! With your constant whining and bickering and ambushing me when I’m with the other.

 As if there are only two faes instead of three in this mating bond. If you ignorant, blinded, self-absorbed alpha males got your tiny dicks out of each other’s uptight assholes you’d see how much you're hurting me. Parading me around the other as if it’s a competition, it’s not a competition.  Instead of you picking where I’m moving, I’ll decide. I’m staying here, in my house, in my castle, in my comfortable bed, in my court since you smug pricks can't act like adults and communicate. This wasn’t supposed to be like this. Everytime you fight it kills me. 

Courting is supposed to be flowers and handwritten letters and-and gifts! and soft spoken words and fun dates not whatever the hell this is! I am tired of the constant traveling, of the back and forth, of leaving a shoe in Eris’ house and the other in Azriel’s. I’m tired of listening to you fight and bulldozing my own emotions in the process. I'm tired of all the lying. gods. Now you are both going to go spend a nice week or two in Eris’ lake house. You’re going to bring me my motherfucking favorite shoes and that stupid bracelet I left there and you are either going to fuck each other or kill each other. - Because sweetheart’s, let’s face it, even a blind man could see you two wanna kiss each other- No. other. options. Because I am exhausted of being yanked around the continent as if. I. don’t. have. work. to. do.” 

Finally, for the first time in an hour silence enveloped my bedroom. 

The only sounds were the quiet breathing of my ragged inhales as I fought to regain my breath after spewing so many words at once. 

A weight lifted off my chest at the words. Long months of dealing with this, and saying nothing, long months of trying to comprise and fix issues that were never mine to solve. If they wanted me they were going to have to learn how to be around me without making me miserable. Because I loved them both so much it hurt. 

A mixture of emotions passed over their faces. A whirlwind of guilt, regret, shame and anger flooding both sides of the bond at once it nearly knocked me off my feet. I reached down for the small decanter sitting on the side table and poured myself a drink. 

Then another one. 

Then all of a sudden the damn burst, both of them recovering from shock. 

“But-” 

“Shush.” I snapped. 

“I-”

“Shush!!.”

“How are we-”

“Don’t even want to hear it.”

“supposed to bring back-” “-kiss him?! As if-”

“Zip. it.” 

“-if we kill eac-”

“Shut. Up.”

“Enora!” “Enora!” They both bit out in frustration. 

“Uh. Uh. I do not want to hear a single peep from either of you. I have a meeting tomorrow with some members of the Court and I swear to the Mother I need at least eight hours if I have to listen to Lord Hennings talk one more time about his stupid new boat.”

“But I-”

“I can’t do this anymore.” My voice broke at the words. “You either go figure your shit out like the plus five hundred year old males you are or as far as I’m concerned I don’t have any mates.” 

The words tasted like bile on my tongue and the weight of them had both of them flinching. Another few minutes of silence passed before Eris took Azriel’s shoulder. Winnowing both of them away, leaving only the heaviness of my words. 

I finished my second drink and walked into the adjoined room. Ignoring the few tears that unwillingly fell and jumped into bed, hoping sleep would soothe my aching soul. 

—— ⭒ ——

Two weeks later, a bouquet of snowdrops appeared on my desk, along with a heartfelt apology letter, smelling of sex and a written promise to figure things out and to take me to the orchestra. 

With both of them in attendance. 

[starsinthesky5]

you belong with me l || joe burrow x reader

description: you and joe have been best friends ever since ohio state and you’ve been his biggest supporter for as long as you both could remember. it was always the same dynamic between you both, friends. very very very close friends. but what if you wanted to be more than just friends?

a/n: best friends to lovers HELLO? you are both so oblivious yet so aware of your feelings at the same time it is crazy. so many little moments that have you like “how the hell are you not aware you’re in love with each other?”.

you’re in denial for a lot of this fic, and Joe pretty much knows what he wants but is a little scared to actually do something about it 

part 2

warnings: language, mentions of sex (no actual smut)

word count: 13.3 k 

—-------------------------------------

Thursday

You had just gotten home from running a few errands, absolutely exhausted from all the running around you had been doing from Christmas shopping and planning for your sister's wedding. You left all the bags in your entryway and collapsed on your couch. 

“Ughh,” you groaned into the pillow. It had been a pretty chaotic week for you and you felt tired and burnt out, and were in desperate need of a night out. 

You heard your phone buzz in your pocket so you moved to lay on your back and pulled your phone out to see who was calling. The name on your screen immediately made you smile and forget about your fatigue, so naturally, you answered it. 

“Hey, Y/N,” Joe said over the phone as he sat down on his couch.

“Hi Joe,” you smiled as you started twirling your his sweatshirt string. Somehow you ended up with a few of Joe’s shirts or hoodies in your closet from when you’d be over at his place or him at yours. Currently, you have one of his old LSU hoodies which was a little big on you, but that made it even more comfier. “How was practice?”. 

“Good,” He breathed out, sounding a little weary. 

“Is something wrong? You sound extra tired,” you ask your best friend. 

“Nah, Just the usual tiredness from practice but I’m fine,” he lied.

You could tell when Joe would lie to you, the tone of his voice would usually give it away. And right now, he was lying to you. “I know you too well Joe, what's up?”. 

He let out a sigh and said, “The Bengals Christmas Party is tomorrow night and I’m dreading it,”. 

“Ahhh, I see. Mr. Hermit Crab has to go to a partyyyy,” you tease. 

“Really funny,” He says, rolling his eyes which you could feel through the screen.

“I know you don’t partially enjoy parties but it’s Christmas, lighten up,” you tell him. “There will be lots of people there to keep you company,”.

“And that’s just the problem. Everyone there is just gonna wanna talk about football and I need one night to just relax,” he says. 

You felt bad for Joe since you knew how all of this would get draining for him. It was already stressful enough that the playoffs were slowly creeping up and the background noise was only getting louder by the day, and then he had 50 other things on top of that to do. He didn’t get any break time once December rolled around. That’s also why it was hard for him to enjoy his birthday, which happened to be next Sunday. 

“I know, I’m sorry. I wish I could do something to stop you from going but you are the face of the team and not going would look bad,”.

As he listens to you, an idea pops into his head. He sits up and says, “You know, it would be a lot more tolerable if you came with me?”. 

Your eyes light up at his offer. Joe always ended up bringing you with him to events like this. Ever since he got drafted by the Bengals, you’d be right by his side at any team activities that needed a plus 1. At first, you weren’t really sure why he’d bring you along with him, and quite honestly you still aren’t really sure since he could just go alone or bring anyone else, but it always seemed to make him more comfortable when you were there and you’d be happy to keep him company at any given time.

“That’s if you're free?” He adds.

“Oh trust me, I am. I’m in desperate need of a night out so this might be the thing I need,” you say as you hop off the couch and walk into your bedroom to figure out an outfit for tomorrow. 

“Everything alright?” He asks as he gets up to figure out his own outfit for tomorrow now that he actually has a reason to go. 

“Yeah, just a triple homicide. Work, Christmas, and my Sister's wedding planning,” you say as you pull out a few Christmasy dresses, none really catching your eye. 

“Damn, December really isn’t our month,” he laughs. “You need a night out,”. 

“You got that right,” you smile. You're just about to ask him what he was thinking of wearing to the party but your sister calls you, interrupting you and Joe’s call. 

“Shit, my Sister’s calling me. Probably more wedding stuff,” you sigh.

“That’s okay,” he laughs. “I’ll pick you up at 6 tomorrow,” he adds.

“Sounds perfect. See you tomorrow,” you smile.

“Bye, Y/N,” he replies before hanging up. You then call your sister back, placing the phone on speaker and throwing it onto the bed.

“Hey Kaylee,” you say as you go back to outfit hunting for tomorrow. 

“Hey, you busy?” She asks.

“A little. I’m trying to find an outfit for tomorrow,” you say as you pull out a cropped red sweater. 

“What’s tomorrow?” She asks.

“Joe asked me to go with him to the team Christmas party,” you said as you dug through your closet for a black mini skirt and sheer tights to go with the sweater. 

“Aw that’s nice,” she says. “You know, with the number of things Joe brings you to or does with you, you’d think that you both would be a couple by now. You are practically his girlfriend,” she jokes, only partly though. 

You immediately stop looking through your closet and turn back to face your phone. “What?” you say as you feel yourself turning red at the mention of being his girlfriend, a thought you buried all those years ago because you thought it was silly. 

“I’m just joking, Y/N, kind of. But I mean, you are doing what girlfriends typically do. I know you’re really close friends and you have been for years, but he brings you to like everything and you’re always doing something together. People think you’re his secret girlfriend for a reason,” she says. 

You find yourself staring off into space as she’s talking. Deep down, you knew she was right but you just didn’t want to look at it that way. You were doing girlfriend duties for him and it became clearer as time passed by. At first, it didn’t bother you much, it was just two best friends doing best friend things right? It was completely normal for you to go to every single one of his games, go to these team events with him, and spend so much time together, right? But as time went on, you started to realize that maybe people’s comments weren’t totally out of left field. It did look like you were his girlfriend, especially since he didn’t have any other girl with him most of the time. 

You had feelings for Joe back when you first met at Ohio State, but you never did anything about them because you thought he didn’t feel the same. You spent weeks spiraling over your feelings towards him, but you eventually gave up because you didn’t want to lose him as a friend in case he felt differently about you, so you buried the feelings and moved on. Or so you thought you buried them. Clearly, that wasn’t the case since you were spiraling, again, at the thought of being his girlfriend and being told that you were acting like it too.  

You never pushed Joe about his dating life because you thought that was boundary stomping. Yes, you two were very close, but you didn’t really want to know the details about his love life for many reasons. You just watched that part of his life from a distance. He had a few girlfriends over the years, none of which stuck around or fizzled out over time. The only consistent girl in his life was you. And that’s why everyone thought you were his girlfriend when he first got drafted.

They were convinced you both were either dating or hooking up, neither of which was true. It was a little awkward when that gained traction, but it slowly faded out over time but still lingered to this day. You both tried to not let it affect your friendship and for the most part, it worked. You ignored and continued to support him in every way possible, but those thoughts of you being a couple were buried deep inside your mind and sometimes peeked through, just like how they were right now. 

“I haven’t really looked at it that way,” you lied. 

“Of course you haven’t. Why would you? Joe is such a great guy and has been a great friend to you for years. Why would you ever think that way,” she laughs.

Being best friends with one of the best quarterbacks in the league had its perks. But you weren’t one to take advantage of that often. You were just there to support your best friend and enjoy the ride. To everyone else, he was Joe Burrow. But to you, he was just Joe. And you loved that you got to see the real him and the guy you met in college was still there regardless of everything that’s changed since then. 

“Rightttt,” you say as you sit down on your bed.

“Well anyways, I’ll leave you to it. I was just calling about what the menu should look like for the pre-wedding brunch but we can talk about that later,” she says.

“You sure?” You ask.

“Positive. Have fun at the party and tell Joe I said hi,”.

“Thanks, Kaylee and I will. I’ll call you soon,” you say as you hang up. You toss your phone to the side and fall back onto your bed. The thought of you and Joe being a couple was stupid, right? You both had been friends for years and never once did he show any other feelings other than friendship towards you, so why was this even a thought? Were you not seeing something that everyone else was? Did Joe ever have the same thoughts as you?

He was the perfect guy. He was kind, selfless, funny, attractive, smart, and charming. Any girl would be so lucky to have him as her boyfriend. Wouldn’t it be nice if he was your boyfriend? He matches your vibe completely and you both have so much in common, plus you already know so much about each other. You would be the perfect couple and people wouldn’t even be surprised if you got together. 

“Nah, this is stupid,” you shook your head as you broke out of whatever fantasy you were dreaming about. 

But was it a fantasy, or was it something that you both wished was reality deep down?

Friday Night 

The next day flew by pretty quickly and you found yourself sitting at your vanity, applying the last bit of makeup before Joe picked you up. You opted for a cropped red sweater, a black mini skirt with sheer tights, and black knee-high boots. Jewelry-wise, you didn’t go all out. Just your usual earrings and necklaces, but you made sure to wear the diamond tennis bracelet Joe got you after he signed his rookie contract. You didn’t wear it often since it was so expensive, but whenever you did, Joe would notice and a huge smile would appear on his face. 

Flashback to 2020

You sat down on Joe’s couch as he brought over two glasses of red wine. He had called you over for dinner tonight at his new place that he bought once his contract money came through.

“I loveee your house. It’s very homey,” you chirp as you pull a plush blanket over your legs. 

“Thank you,” he smiles as he sits down, handing you your wine glass. “If everything goes according to plan, I’ll be upgrading in a few years,”.

“Oh trust me, it’ll go just as planned,” you say, taking a sip of the blood red wine. “You’re about to set the league on fire,”.

“I appreciate the confidence,” Joe laughs as he sips his wine. 

“I’m so glad you got drafted to Cincy. It was already tough enough that you were down in Baton Rouge for 2 years, I don’t know what I would’ve done if you got drafted anywhere else,” you sigh. 

“Sounds like somebody missed me,” he said as he threw his head back into the couch pillow.

“No shit, goofball. I missed my best friend,” you laughed as you playfully shoved his shoulder. 

“Well, take this as an apology,” he says, putting his glass to the side and reaching down to grab something from the side of the couch. He pulls up a small lilac gift bag and places it in your lap. 

“What’s this?” you question as butterflies fill your stomach. You place your glass on the side table and examine the little bag.

“An apology for being away for 2 years,” he says, raising his eyebrows and motioning you to open the bag.

“It’s not like I didn’t see you at all. I went to a few games and you still came back here during your breaks,” you said as you patted his thigh. 

“Still, I wasn’t at your fingertips like I usually am,” he laughs, causing a blush to creep up your face. “Just open it,”.

You nod and open the bag and are met with a beige box. You open the box and your jaw drops at the sight of a shiny, very real-looking, diamond tennis bracelet sitting inside. 

“Joe, what the fuck,” you whispered as you ran your fingers across the big diamonds. “You didn’t have to- This must’ve been so expensive,”.

“Don’t worry about all that. It’s a gift from me to my best friend and saying no would be rude,” he says, grabbing the bracelet and helping you put it on. “In case you forgot, I am a millionaire now, and you never wanna upset a millionaire,” he jokes. 

“Don’t send your minions on me now,” you joke as he clasps the bracelet onto your wrist. “But seriously, you didn’t have to do this,”.

He tilts his head, giving you a look that you never were one to argue with. “Fine, Fine. Thank you sooo much. I love it,” you say as you launch yourself onto him, pulling him in for a warm hug. 

He wraps his arms around you tightly and laughs into your shoulder. His hand runs up and down your back as you run your fingers through his soft hair. You weren’t sure how long you both were hugging; you were waiting for him to pull away, but he was waiting for you to pull away. But at the same time, neither of you really wanted to pull away. 

You appreciated the glamorous gift from him, and you’d be lying if you said you didn’t feel butterflies in your belly when you opened the box. Little did you know this bracelet was his first official purchase from his contract money. He knew that once the money hit his account, he wanted to buy you something to show how much he cared for you, the only girl that has been by his side through thick and thin. 

End of flashback 

Last night’s thoughts were no longer in your head as you reminded yourself that Joe was just your best friend. Nothing more, and nothing less. There was no reason to ruin your bond with a silly little pipe dream. 

You heard your phone buzz from what was probably a text from Joe. You opened the text, laughing at the text, which was a little inside joke you two had made over the years.

Joe: getaway car 

“Getaway Car” was a term you both would use whenever you needed to escape something. Whether it was wanting to leave a college party because you were feeling uncomfortable, wanting to leave an awkward situation, or like right now, when either of you needed a break from life and needed to do something fun. All you would say to each other was “getaway car” and you’d know what was up.  

You smiled at the text, grabbed your purse, and made your way out the door and down to his car. 

Meanwhile, Joe was humming along to the song playing on his aux, ‘Lovers Rock’ by TV Girl. You both had made a shared Spotify playlist years ago back at OSU and would often listen to the playlist whenever you were together, so naturally he had to play it on the way to the party. This song was clearly your addition as Joe’s music taste was a little different, but he’d learn to enjoy songs like this because of you. 

You also used to listen to this playlist during the time Joe was away at LSU and you would miss talking to him since he was extremely busy. He would do the same on those nights when he was alone and couldn’t sleep because he would be missing your silly little movie nights, thinking about if you were having these movie nights with anyone else while he was away. 

You made your way out of your apartment building, spotted Joe’s car, and walked over to it. You knocked on the window since he was too busy staring off into space to notice you walk over. He jumped slightly at the sudden noise but then relaxed as he realized it was just you. He unlocks the door which you swing open, hopping inside and letting out a deep breath.

“Woo, it’s freezing out there,” you say as you rub your hands together for some warmth. 

He stares at you up and down, taking in your outfit which you looked stunning in, his eyes stopping at your wrist which was decked with the diamond bracelet he got you. A smile creeps on his face, which you notice. 

“You look really beautiful,” He smiles as he puts the car into drive and exits the parking lot. 

You blushed at his compliment as you also took in what he was wearing. Black jeans and a dark green sweater along with one of his many diamond chains. He looked so good right now. The way his hair naturally fell into place, the way his mouth was curled up into a smile, and the way his sweater fit perfectly around his muscular arms. He just looked so good. 

“You don’t look too bad yourself, Burrow,” you tease. 

“Thanks for coming with me by the way,” he smiles over at you.

“Anytime,” you smile back. “Remember, just say ‘getaway car’ if you wanna leave if you get overwhelmed or something,”. 

“Aye-Aye, Captain,” he salutes. 

You take note of the song playing in the car and you blush again, and then hear Joe singing a bit of the song under his breath.

"While the others talk, We were listening to lovers rock, In her bedroom," he mumbles.

“Lovers Rock?” You question. “Damn, someone’s music taste def rubbed off on you,”.

“Actually, it’s our playlist that’s on right now. But yeah, I’ve learned to enjoy this kinda music. Might be because of a certain someone,” he shrugs. 

“Hmm, whoever she is must have excellent taste,” you say as you turn up the volume.

“Oh trust me,” he says looking over at you, the look on his face sending shivers down your spine. “She definitely does,”. 

A short drive later, you both arrive at the party. Joe turns the car off, hops out, and jogs over to your side, helping you out of the car before you can even open the door. 

“Such a gentleman,” you tease as you reach to close the car door, but he beats you to it. 

“For you? Always,” he winks as he closes your door and loops your arm around his, leading you into the party. You blush at the contact, but why were you blushing? He’s just being friendly, right?

Before you can dive deeper into those thoughts again, you find yourself already inside the party. soft Christmas music was playing over the speakers as the room was filled with people. You could see why he didn’t want to go now, especially alone. There were a bunch of food stations around the room, holiday photo ops, Christmas games, and the whole 9 yards. It was all a little overwhelming and it looked like Christmas threw up all over the party venue. 

“Merry Christmas,” you whisper. 

“See why I didn’t wanna come here alone?” he laughs. 

“Ohh yeah,” you nod as he leads you over to your friends. 

“Joe! Y/N!,” Jess says as she gets up from the table, a huge grin on her face. 

“Hey Jess,” you chirp as you pull away from Joe’s arm to hug your friend. 

“Hi Jess,” Joe smiles. “Where’s Sam?”.

“Oh, I think he’s over by the drinks with Ja’Marr and Ted,” she says as she pulls away from the hug. 

Joe looks over at you and you already know what he is going to ask, “Go,” you laugh. “I’ll be here with Jess. Yell if you need me?”.

“You got it,” he smiles as he walks over to the guys. 

“I guess Joe strung you along with him tonight?” Jess asks as she sits back down, pulling out the chair next to her for you. 

“Yeah,” you laugh as you sit down. “He didn’t wanna go and asked if I could go with him to make it more tolerable,”.

“Sounds like Joe,” she laughs. “He really hasn’t changed since college has he? He always used to drag you along to all the parties,”. 

“Not at all,” you smile as you see him laughing with the guys. 

“So, first thoughts about the party? Since it’s your first time here,” she asks as she takes a sip of her drink. 

“Verrry Christmasy and grand. Maybe a little Overwhelming?” you sigh. 

“That sounds about right,” she laughs, looking up and smiling, prompting you to turn your head. 

Joe was walking over, a grin on his face and a drink in his hand. “I got you your favorite,” he says, placing the Peach Mojito down in front of you. 

“Thank You,” you smile up at him, squeezing his hand for a second. 

“I’m not drinking tonight so make sure you drink for me too,” he says. 

“Say less,” you say while you pick up your delicious drink. 

“You good though?” He asks.

“I’m great, go with the guys,” you say, flashing him a reassuring smile. 

“Okay. But if you need anything, just come over,” he says. 

“Same goes for you,” you say as he gives you two thumbs up before walking away. 

“Always making sure you’re good before he does anything else. Classic Joe,” Jess smiles, causing you to freeze for a second. He always did that though, right? That’s just what he does with all his friends, not just you. 

“No big deal,” you whisper to yourself. 

“Hm?” Jess asks. 

“Oh nothing, just talking to myself,” you brush off. “So wait. Did Joe go to the party last year?” you ask, changing the subject as you take a sip of your drink. That question was floating through your mind all day, and you needed to know the answer. He didn’t take you last year but he definitely went, but with who? 

“Mhm,” she nods. “He went with Stella,”.

Your heart drops when she says that name. “Ohh right, his ex,” you sigh. 

“Yup,” she nods.  

His ex-girlfriend Stella. You didn’t really know much about her since you only talked to her a couple of times. One day she was in the suite, then suddenly she wasn’t. You didn’t push Joe to tell you what happened, especially since he didn’t seem too upset about it. All he told you was that they both just didn’t work. 

“What happened between them? You know I usually don’t push him about his love life,”. 

“Oh I know,” she laughs. “I don’t really know the full story myself. All Sam told me was that Joe felt like it didn’t fit. Like it wasn’t really what he was looking for relationship-wise or person-wise,”. 

“Interesting,” you say as you sip your drink. You rarely interacted with his girlfriends. Not just because they wouldn’t stick around so why bother, but also because you felt like they didn’t really like your vibe for some reason. Maybe it was because he would always talk about you and spend time with you, but did they care that much? You were just friends anyway and you thought that was obvious.

Joe’s POV

“Sooo, you brought Y/N?” Ja’Marr teases.

“Yes… I did,” you say, taking a sip of your water. 

“Anything going on over there,” Sam teases as he pats your shoulder. 

“What? With me and Y/N?” You scoff. “Please, we would never-”.

“Now don’t lie to me Burrow,” Ja’Marr says. “Don’t act like you wouldn’t go running to her if she looked at you that way,”. 

“Ja’Marr is right,” Ted adds. “It’s kinda obvious you have a thing for her,”. 

“Are you guys drunk?” You scoff. “What’s with the sudden attack?”. 

“Nah, but you might be,” Ja’Marr says. “Wake up Man. You clearly like her. You’re always talking about her, you’re always with her and don’t forget all those times at LSU when you’d be going on about how you wished she was with you right now. Those feelings ain’t die that easily,”.

“There’s a reason that everyone thought and still thinks that she’s your girlfriend,” Sam says.

“That’s just overly invasive fans and their stupid speculation,” you deflect. 

“Mmm, not to mention, have there been any ladies on your radar since Stella? You both broke up in January which was 11 months ago. And the reason was that you didn’t think she was the right person for you,” Ted says.

“Mhm, and does the right person that you’re looking for happen to be sitting there next to my girlfriend?” Sam adds as points over at you. 

You look over at her, smiling as you see her laughing like a hyena at something Jess said. She looked angelic as the soft glow of the lights reflected off her beautiful face; her cute laugh caught your attention even though you were so far away from each other in the crowded room. 

Deep down, you knew they were right. You didn’t want to admit it, but you did have a thing for her and have had a thing for her since OSU. You never brought up those feelings to anyone, not even Y/N. You didn’t know if she felt the same way about you and you were too scared that you’d ruin your friendship if she didn’t feel the same way. 

Those feelings even stuck around at LSU. They actually got stronger since you were away from her for so long. But you once again didn’t want to screw up your bond, so you repressed those feelings as much as you could and tried to distract yourself, but distractions were only temporary. That’s also why none of your girlfriends suck around. They weren’t what you were looking for and you weren’t invested.  What you were looking for had always been by your side since Day 1, but you just didn’t know what to do about it without risking your friendship. You knew you loved her, and she knew that you loved her as a friend. But she didn’t know that you loved her a lot more than how just friends loved each other.

She was the perfect girl. Any man would be lucky to have her as his girlfriend. She was stunning, genuine, funny, fearless, the epitome of a dream girl. Her being your girlfriend was a dream, but it probably would never happen. It never happened all these years you had known each other, so why now? 

But what if she liked you back? You wouldn’t know because you never tried that door, even though you had the key in your pocket all along.

End of Joe’s POV

The party flew by quickly as you talked with the WAGs for a little, ate some yummy food, and Joe made his rounds as QB1 talking to as many people as he could before his social battery ran out. Occasionally, he’d look over at you if he got a little nervous or overwhelmed. The mere sight of you always calmed him down. And once his battery died, he found himself sitting next to you, as usual. 

Joe’s conversation with the guys still lingered in his mind as he watched you chat and drink with your friends. He didn’t know what to do about the feelings he was feeling towards you and how to handle them, so he decided to let it be and just let things flow the way they were. If something was going to happen, it would. If it wasn’t, it wouldn’t. Forcing something would be the last thing he’d ever do with you. 

You were extra giggly for the past hour, definitely drunk since you were on your 4th, maybe 5th drink of the night. You weren’t really sure anymore since you and the other girls did shots at the bar earlier, so it was definitely more than 5. 

“Y/N, how many drinks have you had,” Joe asks as he looks over at you. 

“Hmmm, I don’t know. Numbers are funny,” you giggle as you grab his arms. “You look really pretty tonight, Joey,” you giggle as you grab another drink. “Have you thought about being a male model? I heard Calvin Klein does some pretty fun shots. The girlies would lose it. I know I would,” you giggle.  

Joe’s eyes widened as he blushed a little. You were clearly out of your mind drunk and he knew exactly what would happen when you got this wasted. You’d be all giggly, then you’d have the zoomies, and then you’d crash, hard. He couldn’t have this happen at the party in front of everyone and he knew you’d kick his ass if he let you act like this in front of them. 

“Okayyy, I think that’s enough drinks for tonight,” he says, taking your drink out of your hand.

“Noooo,” you whine as you reach for the drink. “It’s so good though,”.

“And so is weed but you don’t see me being high all the time,” he jokes as he pushes the drink further away from you. 

You raise your eyebrow at him and say, “That’s funnyyyy. Those shades are glued to your face for a reason,”. 

He stares at you for a few seconds, taking in every detail of your face. How your glossy lips were curled up into a smile, how little strands of your hair were falling onto your face, and how you were practically glowing in the soft light of the room. 

“I don’t think you’d particularly enjoy being crossfaded,” he says matter-of-factly. 

“Do you have some right now? Let’s test it out,” You say as your eyes light up.

Oh hell no. How drunk were you? Joe thought to himself.  “Y/N,” he says, staring deeply into your eyes, grabbing both your hands. 

“What?” You giggle softly as you play with the wristbands on his wrist. 

“Getaway Car,” he says.

You immediately sit up in your chair and turn serious at the words that left his mouth, reminding you what those words meant and what they were used for. “Are you okay? Did something happen?”. 

“I’m fine,” he laughs as he grabs your hand that was playing with his wristbands. “But you’re not. You’re 2 seconds away from falling over,”.

“What do you mean? I’m amazingggg,” you laugh as you stand up to prove your point, almost falling over but Joe places his hands on your hips, catching you before you can. His big warm hands were firmly holding you in place as heat climbed up your body at his electric touch. 

“Yeaah, we’re going home now,” he says as he gets up from his chair, not giving you a second to protest. He grabbed your waist with one hand to make sure you didn’t fall over as you said your goodbyes and made your final lap around the room. The hand that was wrapped around your waist caused butterflies to fill your belly. His touch was so gentle and fulfilling, yet had you craving more.

He led you out to the car, his hand still gripping your waist, as you were going on about how much you loved Christmas. 

“I just love giving gifts,” you giggle as you lean your head on his shoulder. “It’s sooo fun getting to see everyone’s reactions when they open the gifts I give them. Speaking of, what do you want for Christmas Joey?”. 

“Nothing,” Joe smiles. “I already have everything I want,” he says, looking down at you. 

You pause for a few seconds as your drunken mind tries to process what he said. You didn’t see him look down at you, but you could feel his gaze on you. He wasn’t talking about you, was he? He was definitely just talking about his life and career. 

“That’s funny. I already got your birthday gift down for next Sunday, but you gotta meet me halfway for Christmas,” you say, quickly dodging those thoughts again. 

“Mmm, still don’t want anything. For either occasion in fact,” he says as you reach the car. He removes his hand from your waist to open your door and then helps you sit inside. 

“Well too bad,” you smile as he sits in the driver’s seat. “I guess I’ll have to figure it out myself,”.

“Have fun,” he says as he connects his phone to the Bluetooth; your playlist once again playing on the speakers. 

You fall back into your seat and bob your head along to the music as Joe pulls the car out of the parking spot, and leaves the party venue. A few minutes later, you’ve made it onto the highway. Your head is leaning against the comfy headrest as you look over at Joe. His tan skin was shining in the moonlight and his pink lips were curled up into a smile. You move your head to look out the window, taking in the gorgeous view of the Cinncinati Skyline, and then notice that Joe drove past the exit that you would take to get downtown to your apartment.

“Joe, you missed the exit,” you say as you flip your head back over to him.

“I know,” he laughs. 

“Uhhh, well are you gonna go a different way or?” you mumble.

“Nah, you’re way too drunk to be left alone tonight. We’re going back to my place,” he says.

“Joe, you don’t have to do that. I’ll be fine on my own and I don’t wanna intrude,” you say, sitting up in your seat.

“Intrude on what? It’s just me in that big-ass house,” he laughs. “Having some company won’t hurt,”.

“Are you sure?” you ask.

“Positive. I know how you get when you’re this drunk and I would be a terrible friend to make you deal with that alone,” he laughs. 

“Yeahh,” you trail off. “You’re such a great..friend,”. It pained you a little to say “friend” and you weren’t entirely sure why. It also pained Joe a little to hear you say “friend”. If only you would put “boy” in front of it, he thought to himself. 

“So it’s settled then. You’re getting the Burrow treatment tonight,” he winks, looking over at you, his eyes sparkling in the moonlight. 

“Uhhh, are we still talking about hangover care or?” you joke, breaking out into a fit of laughter. 

“Dirty, Dirty Mind,” he chuckles as he shakes his head. 

You bit your bottom lip as you stared out the window again, watching the cars pass by one by one you let out a content sigh and got comfy in the car seat again. But then, the song on the aux changed, immediately catching your attention and causing you to flip your head back to him. 

Joe’s eyes light up as he hears the soft music playing in the background, recognizing the song instantly and raising the volume. 

“Ohh yeah,” you say, moving up in your seat and swaying your shoulders as you recite the song lyrics. 

“Because I'm eighteen, And I still live with my parents. Yeah, they're not like yours,” you belt out as you close your eyes and dance in your seat. 

“Well, yours are more understanding. I've never fell in love, I've saved those feelings for you,” Joe sings, looking right over at you as he sings that last bit. He watches you cutely dance around in your seat, his heart softening as he takes in the moment. Something about you sitting in his car seat, after a late night, on the way back to his house, made him feel all giddy inside. 

“So let's do all the stupid shit that young kids do. It's me and you, youuu,” you sing as you open your eyes and point at Joe, who looks a little..lovestruck?

Lovestruck? Please, as if he would ever feel that about you out of all people, you thought to yourself. The alcohol in your system was really messing with your mind right now. 

About 20 minutes later, Joe pulled into the driveway of his house, which was massive. He definitely had upgraded from his last house, just as he had hoped to and just as you said he would do. It was just him in this big house, all alone. He would often get bored since he didn’t have anyone around to keep him company, so he was more than ecstatic to have you over for the night.  

After parking in the garage, he helps you inside the house. He walks you over to the kitchen island, pulling out a barstool with his leg, and motioning for you to sit down.

“First order of business, Water and Advil,” he says as he grabs a water bottle from the fridge, then moves to open the drawer to grab the bottle of Advil. He pulls out two tablets and hands them to you along with the water. 

“Thank you,” you say after you wash down the medicine with the water. 

“Second order of business, getting you something comfy to wear,” he says, grabbing your hand and yanking you off the stool. His warm hand molded perfectly against yours as he led you up the stairs to his bedroom. 

“But I don’t have any clothes here,” you mumbled as he pulled you into his room, still holding your hand. 

“That’s okay, you can just wear one of my big shirts,” he says as drops your hand and walks into his closet, returning to the room after a few moments with a purple LSU shirt in hand. “Is this good?” he asks.

“Perfect,” you whisper as you take the shirt from his hand. “Be right back,” you smile as you walk into his bathroom. 

You peel off your clothes from tonight, placing them into a neat pile on the vanity as you slip on his shirt. It was massive on you, no surprise there though. You smiled as you read the text on the shirt; it was his championship t-shirt from when he won the Natty. You scrunched up the fabric, bringing it to your nose, taking a deep breath, and remembering that amazing night.

Flashback to 2020 – New Orleans, Louisiana 

You looked over at the scoreboard, the score reading 42-25 just as the clock was winding down with only a few minutes left in the 4th quarter. 

“He did it, he really fucking did it,” you whispered as tears started to fall from your eyes, your friends all jumping up and down around you and screaming at the top of their lungs. 

“3..2..1,” Lydia screamed as purple and yellow confetti filled the stadium. The LSU tigers had just won the national championship, Joe had just won the national championship. After years of hard work and dedication, never backing down from a challenge, his dreams had finally come true, and you got to be apart of it and witness it. 

After watching the trophy presentation and the celebrations on the field from the stands, you made your way down to the field, hoping to get a moment with Joe before he was pulled in for media. 

You made your way through the crowds of reporters, players, and families in search of him, but you literally could not figure out where he was. 

“Did he already get pulled in for media?” you asked yourself as you looked around the field, your smile dropping. 

Suddenly, you felt two arms snake around your waist and pull you back into a warm embrace. “What the F-”.

“Calm down, Y/N, it’s just me,” he says, swaying you back and forth. You could recognize that voice anywhere, even in the loudest settings. You place your hands on his and turn your head up, meeting his baby-blue eyes. 

“Joe,” you whisper, feeling tears fill your eyes again. 

“Hi,” he mumbled before you flipped around in his arms and looped your arms around his neck, pulling him in for a hug. 

“You did it,” you said, crying into his shoulder. “I’m s- so proud of you,”.

“Hey, Hey, why are you crying?” he asked, rubbing circles on your back for comfort. 

You pulled your face out from his shoulder and said, “Because, you’re a national champion now, Silly. This is what you’ve been working for and it finally happened. I’ve been fortunate enough to be by your side through the whole thing and can’t help but get emotional when my best friend just had his dream come true,”. 

He stays silent for a few moments before he pushes your head back into his chest. “Thank you. For everything,” he says, his grip on your waist getting tighter. He remembered how you had been nothing but supportive of his dreams since you met. There were days back at OSU when he would come back to his dorm after practice, feeling shitty and lost since nothing felt like it was going his way, and you would drop whatever you were doing at the moment to go and comfort him since he didn’t want to be alone. Those many late nights you spent trying to help him study and catch up on his work so that he could focus on football during the day. And nothing would ever come close to how you refused to miss a single one of his games, even if you were watching back in Ohio. He remembers you telling him that at your friend's bachelorette party, you had the game pulled up on your phone and sat at the bar the entire night watching instead of doing shots and dancing with your friends. 

The day he decided that he was going to LSU was hard for both of you. He could tell how you were holding back from telling him how you really felt, which was incredibly sad and upset, but you knew he had to do this for himself, and he watched as you plastered a smile on your face and cheered him on, even if it broke your heart. 

“You are the most strongest, dedicated, and talented person I know. I am so proud of youuu,” you squeal into his chest. 

Joe felt fireworks in his heart as he listened to you go on and on about how well he did in the game. Those feelings he had for you were so hard to avoid, and right now he felt like ripping the bandaid off and telling you how he felt straight up. But he couldn’t. He wanted nothing more than to kiss your soft lips right now and tell you that he loved you more than anything in the world, but he just couldn’t. Instead, he just enjoyed the feeling of you with him right now during one of the happiest moments in his life. There was no need to ruin it with his pipe dream.   

End of flashback 

You spent a few moments fixing your hair and washing your makeup off before turning off the lights and joining him back outside, but you stopped as you realized something. 

“Fuck, I don’t have shorts on,” you realize. You were just in his shirt, your white lace panties, and your socks, and didn’t know what to do. The shirt was big enough to cover your upper thighs and if you avoided any movement that caused the shirt to ride up, you would be fine.

“He won’t care regardless,” you whisper as you shake your head and leave the bathroom. 

While you were changing, Joe had changed into a pair of sweat shorts and a short-sleeved tee and was sitting on the bed, scrolling through his phone.

“Aren’t you cold? It’s December,” you giggle as you join him in the room again.

He looks up from his phone, heat rising up his cheeks as he takes in the sight of your bare legs and your body which was clothed by one of his shirts. Your cheeks were a little rosy, definitely an effect of all the alcohol you consumed. A feeling of nervousness now filled his body as he watched you put your stuff down on his table, the way your hips swayed from side to side, and how your hair bounced with each step. He realized that he hadn’t given you any shorts or boxers, so you were definitely just in your underwear right now, and that made him want to pass out. Why did he feel like a teenage boy all of a sudden? He had seen you in pajamas many times so why was he feeling like this? Whatever it was, it definitely was not helping the thoughts he had about your relationship earlier in the night because here you were, standing in his room, looking absolutely incredible. 

“You tell me,” he says as he raises his eyebrows. 

“Fair point,” you laugh as you walk over to his bookshelf, a photo frame catching your eye. He carefully watches you as you walk over to the picture, his heart feeling like it is about to beat out of his chest as he realizes what you are looking at. 

It was a photo of the two of you from one of his games at LSU. He was looking down at you, a huge grin on his face as if he was laughing at something you said. You were looking back up at him, smiling at his expression. You both were almost lost in each other’s eyes in this photo, something you hadn’t noticed before. This was Joe’s favorite photo of the two of you and he had managed to keep it to himself, up until now. 

Flashback to 2019 - LSU

You had flown into Baton Rouge early this morning and were going to surprise Joe at his game tonight since he had no idea you were coming. He had been begging you for weeks to come down for a weekend to see him because he missed you, but you kept pushing it off with lazy excuses so you could pull one on him. But little did he know, you had been planning a trip to see him for the past month. 

He caught a glimpse of you in the stands earlier, his entire face lighting up and his heart soaring. He thought he was dreaming for a second as he saw you sitting with his mom, wearing his number, and screaming his name, You waved over at him before the game started, but didn’t get a chance to talk to him as he was pulled into pregame warmups. Now, you were waiting in the tunnel as the game finished, eagerly waiting to see your best friend. 

You were chatting with Joe’s Mom as you waited for him to come out from the locker room. A few minutes later, you heard an all too familiar voice behind you. 

“You fucking liar,” he laughs.

You spin around, your heart skipping a beat as you see Joe standing in front of you. 

You walk over to him, launching yourself into his open arms and letting out a squeal as he tightly wraps them around your waist, slightly lifting you off the ground and swaying you from side to side. “I mm- missed you,” you sputtered, trying to hold back your emotions.

“And you said you were too busy with Jake’s cousin's wedding this weekend,” he says, his hand rubbing your lower back.

“Please, as if I would go to the wedding of my ex’s cousin rather than flying down to see my best friend who I haven’t seen in 5 months,” you say as he lets go of you, slowly sliding you back down to the floor. 

“Ex?” He asked.

“Oh yeah. I forgot to tell you over the phone. We broke up,” you say as you meet his eyes. 

“Really?” He asks, trying hard not to smile. He felt bad that you and Jake broke up, but part of him felt a little happy that there wasn’t any other guy in your life taking his space at the moment. Jake got to do everything Joe would do with you but couldn’t because he was away. The movie marathons, game nights, trying new restaurants, arcade runs, shopping, building legos, literally everything, he got to do, and it made Joe a little jealous. 

He never really got too involved in your dating life. He felt like it was uncharted territory since he was your best friend and a guy. It would be a little weird if he was getting involved. He also didn’t want to give the guys the wrong idea about your friendship. Although, he did have moments where he wished that it was a little more than just a friendship.

“Yeah,” you sigh. “Just didn’t feel right. He didn’t seem invested in the relationship lately anyway,”.

“Mr. Lovebombing not being invested? Shocker,” he teases. You felt your smile drop a little bit at his teasing. Yes, you were over him, but it still stung a little bit since you were pretty unlucky in the boyfriend department and this was just another addition.

He immediately felt bad for saying that, knowing how you felt about relationships, so he pulled you into a side hug. “Sorry, that was jerky,” he mumbles. 

“It’s okay,” you say as you pat his chest. “I should’ve seen it coming,”.

“Well if it makes you feel better, I never liked him anyway, he laughs. 

“Joe,” you say as you playfully swat his arm while pulling away from the hug. 

“Hey, can you blame me? He doesn’t like ‘The Office’. That’s a crime,” he deadpans. 

“I missed you so much,” you laughed, staring deeply into his eyes. God you missed him. You missed his cheery attitude, his million-dollar smile, and the comfort you’d feel when you were with him. Joe could turn your mood around in an instant and make you forget about everything bad in your life. No other guy could ever make you feel the way he did, it was an irreplicable feeling. 

“Me too,” he sighed. “5 months is way too long and you’re so far away,” he mumbled, looking down at his feet.

“I know but hey, I’m here now. And even if it’s for a few days, I’m here,” you say, gently rubbing his bicep.

He looks back up at you with a smile, “Yeah, you are,”. He looked into your chocolaty eyes, searching them for a few moments, hoping to find something in them that he’d been waiting for, but he was interrupted by your laughter. 

“They might have to force me onto the plane back to Ohio. I’ve been here for a day and I don’t want to go back,” you giggle. 

“I can sneak you into my apartment,” he shrugs. “Just act like you’re on the football team and you’re golden,” he jokes. 

While you two were talking, Joe’s mom snapped a few photos of your reunion, neither of you noticing the camera snaps.

“Oh yeahh. I’ll totally fit right in,” you say, shaking your head. “I can be your new star Wide Receiver,”.

“Ja’Marr and Justin might have a problem with that,” he shrugged. 

“They won’t when they see how great of a duo we make, on the field and off,” you wink. 

 End of flashback 

“I haven’t seen this one,” you smile as you look back at him. “Gatekeeping, Burrow?”.

“It’s one of my faves so yes, yes I am gatekeeping,” he shrugs. 

“Well, I’m stealing it,” you say, picking up the frame. 

“Uhh, no you’re not,” he says, slowly standing up from the bed. 

“Ohh yes, I am,” you tease as you turn around to meet his eyes. He walks over to you as you slowly walk backward, moving away from him. 

“Okayyy, I think it’s time for bed,” he says as he reaches out to grab you, but you take another leap back towards the door. 

“Nopeee,” you smirk. “Catch me if you can,” you say, sticking your tongue out at him before running out the door. 

“We are not about to do this,” Joe mumbles as he runs out the door, following you as you run through the halls of his house. Giggles and Laughter echo throughout the house as you run down the stairs, looking back a couple of times to see if he is still there, and he is. Even though he was exhausted, he was enjoying chasing you throughout the halls of his house. The usually quiet halls were now filled with your shrieks and giggles, a sound that he loved to hear. You run over to the kitchen, standing on the other side of the island as Joe runs to the couch to grab a pillow. 

“Joe!” you scream as he grabs a couch pillow, launching it straight at your head but you quickly duck. 

“You asked for it,” he laughed. 

“Oh, it’s on,” you grin as you place the photo on the island, making sure it didn’t get caught in the battle. 

“Whatcha gonna do?” he smirks as he places his hands on his hips, bouncing from side to side.

“Hmm, I don’t know,” you say as you slowly walk over to the comfy chair next to the dining table, grabbing a stray couch pillow and hiding it behind your back. 

He notices you hiding a pillow behind your back, so he leans down and grabs another one. While he was doing this, you ran over and started hitting him, gently of course, with the soft pillow. 

“Got youu,” you giggle as you smack him with a pillow repeatedly. 

“Nope,” he smirks as he grabs his pillow and swings at your abdomen. His strength was unmatched so the hit sent you back a little, almost causing you to fall over.

“Oh, now you’re done for,” you grin as you attack him with the soft pillow and he does the same to you. Giggles and squeals filled the room as you playfully battled it out, neither of you willing to give up. But soon, the teasing turned into a full-blown pillow fight as you both unleashed your inner children, swinging your pillows with wild abandon. Feathers flew everywhere, coating the floor in a soft, white blanket. A couple of swings later, you catch Joe off guard, tackling him to the ground as you place your legs on each side of his hips, caging him in on the floor. 

You hold your pillow above your head in mock triumph. He wriggled beneath you, trying to grab the pillow away, but you held it just out of reach, teasing and taunting him.

“I winnn,” you laugh as you look down, smiling at Joe's disheveled hair and flushed cheeks. You were so caught up in the childish moment that you didn’t even realize you were straddling his hips right now, and his hands were resting firmly on your hips. Your shirt had ridden up your thighs a little and you were definitely showing a little too much down there, but you were so caught up in the moment that you couldn’t care less.

“Zoomies?” Joe giggles as he looks into your eyes. 

“Zoomies,” you nod as you throw the pillow to the side, trying to catch your breath. A million thoughts were now rushing into your head at once. You were literally on top of him right now, but he didn’t even seem bothered by it. It was like he was enjoying it. Was he enjoying it? You move your hand down, placing each one on his biceps and digging your nails into his soft skin. 

Joe was trying so hard not to say something about how you were on top of him right now. He was just enjoying the sight of you above, as silly and sultry as that sounded. He looked down and noticed your bare thighs and the shirt riding up and you seemingly weren’t wearing anything under it other than your underwear, just like he had thought. God, you just looked so pretty and sexy, he thought to himself. Your hair was messy and your cheeks were blush pink, but you still looked gorgeous. You seemed so relaxed and comfortable, and he was trying so hard not to ruin the moment by saying something stupid. 

“You look so pretty,” he thought out loud, his face turning red as he realized he said that to you.

“Thank you,” you smile back, internally screaming at his comment. Was he being extra affectionate tonight, or were you just delusional? You definitely looked like a mess right now, and in no way did you look pretty, but his compliment still made your heart soar. A soft yawn left your lips as you rubbed your eyes, now feeling the ‘crash’ part of your hangover. 

“Crash time?” he asks as he rubs your thighs, your stomach fluttering at the contact. Why was he being so lovey-dovey right now? His soft hands massaged the plush skin of your thighs as you stared deeply into his baby blues, trying to make sense of what was going on. 

“Yeah,” you say as another yawn escapes your lips. You get off of him, slowly standing up as you are feeling the aftermath of the zoomies. Joe holds out his hands just in case you fall over as he gets up. 

“You can sleep in my bed and I can take the couch. The guest bedroom is kinda a mess right now since I’m using it for storage until they finish the basement,” he says.

“Hell no. I don’t wanna kick you out of your own bed,” you say as you pick up the pillows from the floor and put them back on the couch, your legs a little wobbly and your head feeling a little woozy. “I’ll take the couch,”.

“No way. You take the bed,” he says as he picks up the stray feathers from the floor. 

“Not happening, Joseph,” you mumble as you help him gather the feathers.

He heaves out a sigh, “I’m too tired to fight you on this. Why don’t we just share it?”. 

Your heart skips a beat as you look up at him, the look on his face telling you he is 100% serious. Although you and Joe had been friends for years, you had never slept in the same bed together. 

“As long as you’re not a kicker,” he jokes.

“Please, I sleep like a baby,” you say as you walk over to the trash can, throwing the feathers into the bin. “Besides, I’m more of a cuddler and not a kicker,”. 

“So that’s a yes?” He asks, trying not to sound too eager, especially at the mention of cuddling. 

“Fineee,” you smile. “If you insist,”.  

Internally, Joe was screaming. He told himself that he’d let things flow the way they were and let things happen naturally, that’s if something were to happen. He didn’t know if he was just reading into things a little too much, but was it just him or were you acting a little different around him?

Your heart felt like it was about to beat out of your chest. There was no reason for you to get so worked up over sharing a bed with Joe. It was nothing, just you sleeping right next to him, together under the covers, so incredibly close to his body. It was definitely nothing. 

A little later, you're getting ready for bed as Joe brings out an extra pillow for you. You walk over to the bed, open the soft covers, and slide in. His bed was so comfortable; so soft and like a cloud. He turns off the lights and plugs in his phone before joining you in bed. Your heart was beating so fast as he moved into the bed next to you. There was no reason for this to be weird, but you were making it weird. 

You moved back against the pillow, sliding down the bed, and pulling the covers up to protect you from the chilly room and to hide your nervousness. 

“Did you have fun tonight?” You asked Joe as you stared up at the ceiling. 

“Actually? I did. All thanks to you,” he said. 

“Really?” You giggled, moving your head to look at him. You could barely make out his face in the darkness, but you could tell he was looking at you. 

“Yup. You make everything more enjoyable and bearable for me,” he said, turning his head back over and staring up at the ceiling. “Did you have fun? I hope these football things aren’t getting too repetitive for you,”.

“Not at all repetitive. You know I love doing this stuff with you. I needed a break from life and this was just the thing. Thanks for bringing me with you,” you smiled.

“You don’t have to thank me, Y/N. You know I’m always here when you need something, even if it’s an escape from life for a day,” he says as he moves his hand down to yours, entwining your fingers together as he gives your hand a soft squeeze. Butterflies filled your stomach at his soft touch and meaningful words. 

“Besides, I enjoy having you as my permanent plus 1,” he laughs. 

“Permanent?” You ask, feeling the heat rise up your body again. 

“Yeah,” he sighs. “If you haven’t noticed, I’m not having much luck in the girlfriend department,”. 

“Not saying you’re filling in those shoes and are a filler,” he says, quickly trying to soften his words because of how jerky it sounded. “I just like having you with me all the time, Ya know? That’s prob why people think you’re my girlfriend”.

“It’s okay, Joe. I know what you mean,” you say, adding a fake laugh into the mix. Your stomach did a somersault when he said that. Were you really about to have this conversation about that topic right now? 

“But please, I could name at least 100 girls who would be standing at your doorstep in an instant,” you giggle. 

“Yeah, but that doesn’t mean I want any of those girls,” he says, craning his head over to face you, his hand still holding yours, now tighter. 

“I want someone who matches my vibe. Someone who makes me feel normal and doesn’t constantly remind me that I’m a millionaire quarterback. Someone that I can take home to my parents and can feel comfortable around. Someone who can enjoy the simplicity of playing Smash-Bros and building Legos as a date. Someone that appreciates the real me and not the superficial flashy shit,” he says. As he was saying all of this, the girl he pictured in his mind was you. He was describing you. You were what he wanted. 

“You didn’t find that with Stella?” You asked, completely oblivious to what he was implying.

“Nah. She was great at first but as time went on I realized that she was more into the lifestyle of dating a football player than the actual relationship part. And I also didn’t feel fireworks with her,” he said.

“Ah yes. Fireworks. Just like your Mom told us,” you remembered. His mom had told you at dinner a few years ago that when she met his dad, she felt fireworks. Fireworks are what you feel when you meet the right person, according to Robin. You hadn’t felt fireworks with any other guy other than Joe, but you never told that to anyone. And he felt the same. He felt fireworks every time he was with you and he’d never felt that with any girl. 

“Yeah so I’ll probably die alone, he jokes.

“Please, we’ll die alone together,” you say as you take your hand out of hold and playfully shove his shoulder.

“I’m assuming there’s no guys on your radar?” He wonders, hoping you would say no.

“Nope. There hasn’t been any since Noah,” you replied.

“That was 8 months ago,” Joe gasped.

“Why do you sound so surprised?” you laughed. “You know I’ve never had luck with guys. None of them match my vibe and want something else out of the relationship that I don’t agree with. I want someone real, genuine, and serious,”. 

“I could name 100 guys that would be at your doorstep in an instant,” he says, echoing your words from earlier.

“Doesn’t mean I want any of them,” you say, echoing his words. 

“Fair point,” he laughs. 

“Yeah. So I’ll die alone too,” you joke.

“Technically not alone if we die alone together. We’ll have each other,” he said. 

“I wouldn’t want it any other way,” you yawned, feeling another wave of tiredness

“Sleepy time?” Joe chuckles. 

“Mhmmm,” you groan as you stretch out your arms. “Don't ever let me drink that much again,” you mumble as you pull the covers higher. 

“You got it. Goodnight, Y/N,” he smiles as he turns his head over to you. 

“Night, Joey,” you smile before turning over and letting out a deep breath. 

20 minutes passed by and you were still wide awake, not finding comfort in his bed which was odd considering it was like a cloud. Your thoughts about you and Joe were also keeping you from sleeping. Ever since your sister mentioned that you were acting like Joe’s girlfriend yesterday, your head was spiraling and the alcohol from tonight was making it worse. And the conversation you just had with him was making it even more confusing. Sure, you did some girlfriend-type things, but you knew he would never look at you that way. He saw you as a friend and that’s all, at least that’s what you thought. 

Suddenly, you felt Joe’s hand creep around your waist, pulling you into his chest. Your heart stopped and your body froze from the sudden movement. What the actual fuck was going on. 

“Joe?” You mumbled, not meeting his eyes because you were literally about to scream.

“Hm?” He mumbled, half asleep. 

“Your arm,” you whispered.

“I’m cold,” he muttered as he held you tighter. “And you’re so warm and comfy,”. 

Your heartbeat picked up again as you felt his big hand sprawled out against your belly, not to mention that your ass was literally on his crotch right now. His body, although saying he felt cold, was hot. So very hot. 

“Is this weird?” he mumbles, opening his eyes. He really hoped that this didn’t weird you out.

You stayed silent for a few seconds, not knowing what to say or do. You didn’t feel weird oddly enough as that sounded. Something about this felt natural and so right. 

“It’s okay,” you softly spoke. “I’m good,”. 

Joe smiled at your response, feeling like he was flying through the clouds right now as he was practically cuddling with his favorite person. Everything about this just felt so right, and he wasn’t the only one who thought so. 

“Good, you said you were a cuddler so I hope this is comfy,” he mumbled. 

You felt your heart exploding as he moved closer to you. His arm around you felt like a safety blanket, protecting you from everything on the outside. A comfortable embrace that you wished you had around you forever. It felt right.

“Trust me, it’s perfect,” you whisper, closing your eyes and losing yourself in his embrace, too tired from the night to fight back. 

A few moments later, you were fast asleep, finally feeling comfortable and it was all because of him. 

The next morning 

Your eyes slowly flutter open as the golden light shines through the windows. You reach out to grab your phone, the time reading 7:35 AM. You felt your head slowly start to throb, a sure result of your hangover from last night. You were just about to get up but you felt a heavy force holding you down. 

“What the-” you whisper as you look down, noticing Joe’s hand is still wrapped around your stomach. You had forgotten that you were at his house and in his bed, and he was still wrapped around you. 

“Uh oh,” you whisper. You turned your head around and saw Joe sound asleep, looking so adorable as his hair was sprawled out against the pillow and soft snores coming from his mouth. You remember that he brought you here after the party last night, which meant you had no way of getting back home. You didn’t want to wake him up because first, he looked so comfortable right now, and second, you didn’t know how to talk to him after what happened last night. Those thoughts you had about your relationship with Joe only got stronger after the night you had. Although nothing like that happened, your feelings for him surely got more complicated. 

“Don’t leave me,” you heard Joe mumble in his sleep. 

Your eyes widened at his soft words, was he talking about you? You turned your head around to see if he was awake, but he was still sound asleep and snoring again. He must’ve been sleeptalking, you thought to yourself. 

You pulled out your phone again, opening up your messages to beg your friend Lydia to come pick you up. She usually got up early on Saturdays for Pilates so she should respond.

You: emergency! please come pick me up 

Lydia: good morning to you too lol. everything alright? 

You: everything’s fine I just uhh need a ride home

Lydia: home? where are you?? 

You: joe’s house 

Lydia: oh 👀 

You sighed at your friend's text. Now was not the time to have this conversation and you knew exactly what she was going to say. You and Lydia had known each other since Ohio State so she pretty much knew everything about you and Joe’s friendship since you were all a part of the same friend group. She was a huge advocate for you and Joe to be a couple back at OSU, but you always shut her down before she could get too matchmaker-ish. She claimed that she saw something “special” between you two, but your ignorant ass brushed it off over and over, just like how you were doing now. 

You: just pls come pick me up

Lydia: on my way ;) be there in 10

You let out a relieved sigh as you carefully peeled Joe’s hand off from your waist, quickly replacing it with a pillow so he wouldn’t feel the difference, and thankfully he didn’t. You walked into the bathroom, grabbed your clothes from last night, and quickly exited his room. You glanced back at him for a few seconds, taking note of the smile on his adorable face and his arms wrapped tightly around the pillow that he thought was your waist. 

“Man,” you whispered to yourself as you turned back around and made your way down the stairs. 

You waited by the door for Lydia as your mind was exploding with thoughts now that you were sober enough to process everything. What the hell happened last night? Was Joe just being the usual Joe because something felt different about his mannerisms, words, and attitude toward you the entire night? And even this morning, his arm was still around your waist and seemingly wasn’t planning on moving it. 

You heard a car pull up and peeked out the window, seeing that it was your bestie. “Thank fuck,” you sighed as you had to escape the scene. You don’t know what you would’ve said to him once he had woken up. Especially since you were 100% in your senses now. 

You quickly opened the door, softly shutting it on your way out. You ran over to her car and hopped inside without a second thought. 

“Damn, you’re in a rush,” she laughs as she locks the door after you shut it. 

“No rush. Just uhh, need to get home,” you say as you buckle your seatbelt.

“Whatever you say,” Lydia giggles as she puts the car in drive. “So how was it?” She asks. 

“How was what?” You say, raising your eyebrows.

“The sex, dummy,” she laughs.

“What?” You shriek as your eyes widen.

“Don't play dumb with me, Y/N. Is he as good in bed as he is on the field?”. 

You stare at her for a few quiet seconds before breaking out into a fit of laughter. 

“Oh my god,” you laugh as you lean forward. 

“Took you long enough. I’ve been saying this would happen for yeaaaars,” she boasts. “Why else would you need me to come to pick you up from Joe’s house at 8 am while you’re wearing what definitely is his t-shirt and I assume no shorts and just panties underneath?” She adds. 

“You’ve got it all wrong,” you wheeze. “I was super drunk last night from the Christmas party and he just brought me to his place,”. 

“Ahh, so drunken sex? Even better,” she teases as she winks at you.

“Lydia, we didn’t hook up,” you say, your laughter dying down. “He just gave me his shirt so I wouldn’t have to sleep in my outfit from the party,”. 

“Okayyy sure, but that still doesn’t explain why you ran out of his house so early in the morning and why he couldn’t take you home,” she said. 

“That’s a long story,” you say, taking a deep breath and falling back into your seat.

“We’ve got time,” she laughs.

“I don’t really know,” you breathe out, staring up at the ceiling of the car. “My sister mentioned the other day that I’m acting like Joe’s girlfriend and it just got me thinking,” you sigh. 

“Oh?” She says, a smile forming on her face.

“And last night was weird. I feel like he was being extra affectionate but I don’t know if that was just the alcohol in my system messing with me. And he was talking to me about how he hadn’t found the right girl yet, how he brings me everywhere and that’s why people think we’re dating, and how I’m his ‘permanent plus 1’ because he likes having me around,”. 

“Ohhhhh?” Lydia drags out, her face scrunching up as she tries to hold back from saying something about it.

“Don’t get too excited. I already knew that the general public thought that we were together, but I thought we were over that,”. 

“You won’t be able to get over that until you admit the truth. And the truth is that you like him. Like more than just a friend,” Lydia blurts out. “I see it, the public sees it, and I honestly think Joe sees it too,”. 

You stay silent for a few seconds, a little taken aback by her observation and not knowing how to respond to her since you can barely make sense of your feelings.

“Oh my god? You like him don’t you?!” She yells as she looks over at you.  

“I don’t knowwww,” you said. “There’s a lot of thoughts in my head right now and I don’t know what to think. I feel like he’s been acting differently around me, like more lovey-dovey differently but I don’t know if I’m reading into it too much,” you respond. 

“Okay, well what are the thoughts in your head saying?”.

“That I think I like him? Or still like him I guess. But I don’t know if he feels the same and I don’t wanna say anything because if he doesn’t, it’ll fuck up our friendship and I can’t lose him,” you say. 

“He’s so sweet and perfect. Joe knows me better than anyone and knows exactly how to cheer me up, calm me down, and make me have fun. I’ve never met anyone like him before and being by his side since day 1 has been a dream but also crazy. And the fact that he hasn't changed since we met is even more crazy. Even with all the money, fame, and attention, he's still Joe. My Joe," you smile. “The same adorable, nerdy, football player that was my lab partner in chemistry freshman year,”.

“Girl, you definitely love him,” your friend says, looking over at you with a straight face.

“Love?” You ask, your heart skipping a beat. 

“Yes, love. You’ve known each other since freshman year of college and if I’m not mistaken, those feelings have been there since then. You’re doing the same thing you did back then, letting your overthinking get in the way. You’re too afraid of losing him as a friend, but Y/N, what if he has the same feelings as you? This isn’t a matter of liking a boy, it’s a matter of you being in love with someone who you’ve had feelings for since you both met. That’s years and years of unanswered feelings that were being built up inside of you and spilling out right now,”. 

Were you in love with Joe? Have you been in love with him all this time? You find yourself smiling as you imagine you and Joe as a couple. Waking up to his adorable smile and sexy morning voice every day, going on cute little dates with him every week around town, kissing him good luck before every game, getting to curl up on the couch with him after every game, and talking about anything and everything together for hours on end without any limitations. It all sounded like a dream, a dream you wished was reality. 

Lydia looked over at your face, seeing you with a huge grin on your face and a blush creeping up on your cheeks.

“I knew it. You love him,” she says as she playfully shoves your shoulder. "There is a reason why none of your relationships work out. The person who you've been waiting for has been right in front of you this entire time,".

“Again, I don’t know,” you giggle. “I don’t wanna say anything to him because I don’t know if he feels the same way,”.

“I get that, I do. You don’t want to risk your friendship, but here’s my advice. Go with the flow. If something’s going to happen, it will. If nothing’s gonna happen, it won’t. Let things unfold naturally and if he’s there and waiting for you at the door, open it and never let him leave,” she says. “And I have a feeling that he’s gonna be at the door,” she adds. 

You spent a few seconds thinking about her advice. She was right, if you weren’t overthinking it and he really did feel the same way about you, he would be there. And if you were overthinking it, and he didn’t feel the same, you would accept it, bury those feelings for real this time, and keep the ball rolling.

You just had to wait and see.

To be continued! 

part 2

[quinnysnursery]

can you do reader being besties with tara yummy and one day while they are hanging out reader gets upset/stressed over something and starts slipping into little space immediately, in which tara knows about but hasn’t seen yet so she calls reader’s caregiver(maybe chris as readers’s main cg?) to see how to comfort and make the reader feel better?

[❤️] it takes a village | tara yummy one-shot

paring : babysitter!tara yummy x little!fem!reader x background!cg!chris sturniolo

summary : after seeing a particuallry hateful tweets you unexpectedly slip while at taras house...no worries though! she's got ya.

warning/extra tid-bits : use of y/n, explicit language, crying, that's all i think!!

word count : 1,108

divider credit : umm i found all the photos on pinterest :3 (trees from @saradika-graphics)

a/n : for all you can eat pasta HOUSE💜 anon!! also, i finally didn't make the title apart of the final sentence everyone cheer (not proof read, i'm just a girl!)

You and Tara let out a shriek as you saw a moth fly past your eyes, desperately looking for an escape out of the house.

“Did Chris leave the door open?” You asked, looking towards the front door- it was shut. The little stowaway must’ve snuck in whilst the triplets were dropping you off. You and Tara leapt off the couch, determined to save the small winged creature.

It took you two about twenty minutes to get the moth into a cup and outside. 

Once you two were finished with your sidequest, you both flopped onto the couch- letting out sighs of relief. “I’m so tweeting about that.” You chuckled softly, grabbing your phone from the pocket of your sweatpants and opening up the app. Tara gave you a few ideas of how to word the post- laughing about how both of you shrieked at the first sight of the small creature.

You mindlessly scrolled up as Twitter opened- allowing your eyes to land on a tweet you wish you hadn’t.

Your eyes immediately glossed over, a feeling of sadness washing over your body as you processed what you’d read. Were you too childish? Sure, you were known on the internet for being bubbly but childish? Did people really see you as childish? 

“Y/n? You good?” Tara asked, setting down her phone and sitting up straight- a look of concern plastering her face. You let out a shaky breath, closing your phone and trying to blink away your tears.

“Hey…what’s going on?” She asked, scooting over and pulling you into a hug. “Just- Just a stupid comment.” You sighed, trying to brush off the hurtful words. Your mind was beckoning for regression but you did your best to push it away- you’d just gotten upset over being called childish, was regression really gonna help with that?

Tara frowned, rubbing your shoulder comfortingly. “I’m sorry hon, I hate people like that.” She expressed. You knew that Tara suffered from copious amounts of hate comments, ranging from calling her a “desperate pick-me” to slut-shaming her beyond belief.

You sniffled, leaning against Tara’s shoulder. “Are you okay? D’you wanna talk about it?” She asked, earning a soft nod from you. “They called ‘e childish…” You murmured, fidgeting with your sweatpant strings. Tara hummed- understanding that it’d struck a nerve.

“M’ not childish though-even…even if ‘m little sometimes.” You explained, Tara was one of the few friends who knew of your regression. The persian woman nodded, “You aren’t childish at all, being childish isn’t even a bad thing.” She commented.

That was true. It wasn’t necessarily bad to be childish, it just hurt since you knew the user behind the account meant it malicefully. 

“D’you want me to call Chris to come get you? I understand if you wanna cut our sleepover short.” She smiled warmly, you smiled back at your best friend's compassion. You thought it over, eventually coming to the conclusion that you wouldn’t be able to push your regression off for much longer.

“Yeah,” You sighed, “Sorry I just- I think ‘m gonna slip.” You said sheepishly. Tara nodded, pulling out her phone and scrolling to find Chris’ contact. You peaked over Tara’s shoulder, fuzziness growing in your mind as Tara clicked the call button on your caregiver’s contact.

You kicked your legs idly, letting out a soft yawn. Tara couldn’t help but coo, snuggling you closer. “Chris’ll be here soon, promise.” She reassured, bringing the phone to her ear. 

Tara waited for a few moments, it only took three rings for Chris to pick up. “Hey C-” The persian woman’s words were spoken over, “Is Y/n okay? What happened?” Chris immediately asked, worry evident in his voice.

Tara couldn’t help but smile at your boyfriend’s worry- it was obvious to anyone that he cared about you deeply. The perfect caregiver. 

“Y/n’s alright, she’s on the verge of slipping though. Could you three come back and get her?” The black haired woman asked, “Shit-” The muffled sounds of Chris telling Matt and Nick the situation emitted through the speakers of the device. “Yeah, of course.” He finally answered. “We’ll be there in like fifteen, you got her ‘til then?” Chris asked, prepared to stay on the phone. 

Tara glanced at the little who was squished against her shoulder- now mostly regressed. “Yeah, I got her.” Tara smiled, tapping your nose playfully. You wrinkled up your nose, sticking your tongue out at the babysitter.

Chris thanked Tara before hanging up, leaving just you two- and Sugar, of course.

“I think someone’s sleepy.” Tara laughed softly, you shook your head no- but your body betrayed you by forcing you to let out a big yawn. “Oh really?” She teased playfully, helping you scoot down so you could be laid out on the couch- your head now resting on her lap.

“You can take a nap y/n, I’ve gotcha.” Tara promised, earning a sleepy nod from you. You rubbed your tired eyes with balled up fists, letting Tara rub circles into your back. “Mmm…” You whined, “Hm? What’s wrong?” She asked, leaning down slightly.

“M’ wanna story…” You drew out, giving Tara your signature puppy-dog eyes and well, how could she say no to those?

Tara didn’t have any childrens books but she had a plethora of real life stories she could tell. “Well, last week when I was filming with Jake he thought it’d be funny to-” Tara continued on, explaining how Jake had somehow managed to drop an entire box of Crumbl Cookies onto Tara’s lap.

It didn’t take long for you to fall asleep.

You woke to your hair being moved away from your face, a familiar voice murmuring to you. “I’ve got you baby, c’mere.” Chris’ voice cooed, scooping you into his arms and allowing you to latch onto his torso. You whined at the bright lights in Tara’s living room being too harsh on your sleep-ridden eyes.

Once you realized that Chris was making his way towards the front door, you quickly sprung your head up- eyes finding Tara. “Tar…” You whined, causing Chris to stop. “What is it, princess?” He asked as Tara approached you two. “Bye bye Ta’wa…” You smile, stretching your hand out to wave.

Tara’s heart melted, standing on her tippy toes to place a gentle kiss on your cheek. “Bye bye sweet girl. You can come over and play another day, yeah?” She hummed, earning an excited nod from you.

Just before Chris walked out the door, he turned ever so slightly in Tara’s direction. “Thank you, Tara.” He thanked, earning a nod from Tara. 

“Of course, anytime.”

taglist !! :

@mattssturnz @littlestar44 @graceslittlecorner @zivall @hrtz4alex2211 @bimbob1tch @sturnsxplr-25 @cherry-red-heart @pr3ttyf4wn @frlinbruh @jazminepetit-homme @raynaaxx @tyummyz @babybatxxx @natedoeswife @blahbel668 @nicksloverrr @flow3rsturns13 @pkfferoo @pixxiies @mattsturnswhore @17welch17 @pinksikhewei @v33angel @conspiracy-ash

[freedomfireflies]

Pillowtalk*

Summary: An extra for Mine*

Save a horse, ride a pillow.

Turns out, Harry isn't always so forgiving.

Word Count: 4.4k

(This one shot is separate from the events of the last extra!! Just something smutty for fun!)

*Contains Mature and Explicit content! Please only consume what you feel comfortable with!💞 You are so much more important!*

You know you’ve fucked up even before Harry walks through the door.

He’s normally a very patient man. Very forgiving. Understanding.

But you know today will be different.

See, you’ve done the one thing he absolutely hates, more than anything in the world:

You’ve lied to him.

Or rather, you’ve refused him. Refused his suggestion. His offer to help you relieve some tension. And not because you don’t want to or because you feel uncomfortable. Because you know if you’d used your safe word, he would have dropped it instantly, no questions asked.

But you know he’s been watching you for the past few days. Noticing how you rut against him in your sleep. Throw a leg over his thigh and grind down without even realizing. Whimper beneath your breath at the faint contact before curling into his side.

See, you’ve been fighting your subspace for weeks. You’re not sure why it’s kept trying to creep up on you. Maybe you’re lonely. Maybe you’re in heat. Maybe you just need Harry to fuck you into the mattress to set things right.

But he’s been incredibly busy. And stressed. And the thought of bothering him with this has been out of the question. So, you’ve kept it to yourself.

It wasn’t until Asher found you squeezing a pillow between your thighs earlier today that Harry became aware of how serious it was.

Asher had called him instantly and told him before Harry made him put you on the phone. He was anxious to fix it for you, asking if you’d like to come to the warehouse so he could help you out. He’d play with you, kiss you, cuddle you, and make everything better.

But you hadn’t wanted to be a bother. You’d brushed him off, told him you were fine. You’d watch some TV and get over it.

And he hadn’t liked this, instead suggesting that he leave work altogether and come home so he could dedicate the rest of his day to you.

Another proposition that you refused. Insisting once more that you didn’t want to take up any of his time. You knew he was busy, and this was nothing. You weren’t an animal. You’d be fine.

It was your second refusal that upset him. The way you lied just to please him. How you put his needs above your own.

You knew he wanted to chastise you over the phone, but he simply offered a solemn but chilling goodbye before the line went dead.

So, you handed the phone back to Asher with a sheepish raise of your eyebrows.

He tutted sympathetically as he said, “Oh, sweetheart. You’ve done it now.”

It became clear then just how badly you’d fucked up. And you could do nothing but wait for your boyfriend’s return as the anxious pit in your stomach began to form.

This is how Harry finds you a couple of hours later. You’ve been anticipating him, his driver having radioed to Asher about his arrival before he left.

And you’ve done nothing but pace the living room floor, practicing what you’ll say when you see him. Which will be any second now. You can hear him coming up the stairs, the heavy boots on his feet echoing in from the hall. 

He can’t be that mad. He can’t. Not after he hears your side. 

You’ll start with a string of apologies and then an explanation. And maybe he’ll understand because sometimes you don’t think when you’re in this type of headspace, and surely he’ll be able to see that. Surely he’ll listen to reason—

“Hi, mama.”

The normally loving nickname is murmured beneath a low strain of voice, and you look up from the carpet to find the man of the hour.

Shit.

He’s standing by the now closed door, eyes narrowed, and expression stern. His tongue is running over his bottom lip and he casually makes his way into the apartment just as Asher steps out of the room.

“Hi,” you call timidly, hands sliding behind your back as you wait for him to approach. “How was…how was your day?”

“Fine,” he replies after a long moment of pause. “Before I got a rather upsetting phone call.”

You swallow, lashes fluttering the closer he gets. “I know, I’m sorry. I…look, you’ve been under a lot of stress, and I know you were just trying to help, but I didn’t want to—”

“No,” he says simply, bringing your spiel to a halt. “No, I don’t want to hear you speak again until I give you permission to do so. Is that understood?”

Instantly, your lips press together as you nod once. Shit, shit, shit.

“Good.” He takes another step, and it feels as though he sucks the air right out of your lungs. “Do you understand why I’m upset?”

Another nod, wordless.

“Do you understand that I don’t like when you lie to me?”

Nod.

“Do you understand that if you’re struggling or floating away from me, I need to know?” He’s close enough now that you can smell the faintest whisper of cigarettes and cologne. An oddly comforting mix. “That if you lie to me when you’re in your subspace, it’s incredibly dangerous? And scary?”

You hadn’t thought of it like that. In fact, it never even crossed your mind to imagine how he might feel to be put in this sort of position again. Especially after the last time. 

 Guilt crawls up the back of your neck as you fight the urge to look down at the floor, forcing eye contact with the tall man before you. 

You motion your agreement once more before Harry’s hardened expression softens.

“Did you know you were slipping?” he asks gently, now reaching out to brush his palm along your cheek. “Because if this was an accident, and you weren’t sure, then I won’t be mad at you, sugar.”

You could say no. You could get yourself out of this mess with one simple word. Make him happy. Reassure him.

But…you knew. You had a suspicion even if you weren’t one hundred percent sure. And lying to him again will only make the damage worse.

You press your hand over his, keeping it against your face. Soaking up the contact and the few short moments of his relaxed demeanor you have left.

“Yes,” you whisper quietly. Bashfully. You don’t look at him. You look at the collar on his shirt, willing the tears to stay inside. “And I was scared.”

He takes hold of your other cheek now, grasping onto you with concern and love as his brows furrow. “Scared how, mama? What can I do?”

You whimper, fingers slipping around his wrists. “I didn’t want to take you away from your work. It was more important. And I didn’t want you to fall behind or feel like you had to help me. I thought I would be okay, that I could fight it. And I could wait until you weren’t as busy.”

He’s still frowning but it’s softer now. As though he’s in great pain. “My sweet girl,” he exhales, stepping closer until your chests brush. “I never…ever feel like I have to help you. I want to help you. I thought you knew that.”

And you do. But when you’re in that sort of mindset…

He sighs. “I never meant to neglect you. Or leave you here or make you wait. You are the most important thing in the fucking world to me. There’s a reason I have so many men working for me, and it’s so they can take over whenever I need them to. Whenever I have better places to be. Like here. With you.”

A tear falls but his thumb gingerly wipes it away.

“I worry about you all the goddamn time,” he murmurs, and your stomach flips. “It’s hard enough being away from you, but knowing you were in so much pain and so much frustration when I wasn’t here to fix it for you makes my fucking skin crawl. It’s the scariest thing in the world to me to know you’ve slipped when I’m not here.”

You nuzzle into his touch, remorse clouding your vision.

“It’s even scary when I am here,” he whispers, almost as if admitting a secret. “Because it proves how much you trust me. And all I want to do is keep you safe, keep you mine. Keep you. In any way I can.”

“I know,” you finally say. “I know, I’m sorry. I just didn’t want to upset you.”

He scoffs a bit beneath his breath, like it wounds him to hear you say this, and you can see the repercussions of it on his face.

“Sugar,” he breathes, “asking for my attention will never upset me. My attention belongs to you. It’s yours, always, every fucking second of every fucking day. Even if it’s just a headache and you need me to come home, I will. I will always put you first.”

Your heart feels as though it blooms in your chest.

“And if I can’t be there,” he continues, “I know there’s someone else here to keep you safe until I can be.”

With this, he glances over his shoulder toward his second-in-command, who’s now leaning against the doorframe, watching you both closely. 

Surprised, and a bit relieved, you and Asher exchange a small, knowing smile before you look back to Harry. “I know. I’m sorry. Really.”

And you can tell this hasn’t fixed anything, but he seems somewhat comforted by this as he leans forward and presses his lips to yours. His palms pressing hard into your cheeks to keep you close.

“I know,” he echoes, leaning back and releasing you. “But you still lied to me. When you knew better. And actions have consequences, don’t they, mama?”

Your blood runs cold as you nod mutely and watch him walk toward the couch. He’s relaxed yet firm. The air in the room shifting instantaneously while he nods at Asher who begins walking closer as well.

Everything is spinning, your head, your heart, your stomach. You have no idea what to expect next, and as Harry takes a seat, you decide that you probably aren’t going to like it.

“I promised I would always take care of you,” he begins, throwing an arm over the back of the sofa as his right-hand man comes over to sit beside him. “And I plan to keep that promise, even after you’ve been so disobedient.”

You notice now the large pillow in Asher’s hand, and a hundred and one questions flash through your mind as it’s handed to your boyfriend.

“So, that’s what I’m going to do,” Harry says, taking the object from him before tossing it toward the ground at your feet. “Gonna let you ride this pillow until you feel better.”

Oh.

It all clicks now. Makes perfect fucking sense and heat floods your cheeks as you look from the pillow to the two men in front of you. 

Harry nods his chin, the corner of his mouth curling up into a rather sadistic display of reassurance. “Go on.”

And you can’t refuse him again. Can’t argue or try to talk him out of it. He’s made up his mind. In fact, he probably decided on this the moment he hung up the phone earlier today.

Instead, you swallow thickly and slowly lower yourself onto your knees. You can’t deny that you’re slightly…thrilled by the idea. Something you assume Harry knew you would be. No matter how callous the man can be, he always puts your pleasure first. Even when he’s upset.

And yes, this is meant to humiliate you. Which it does.

But you like the idea of them watching you. Of them seeing the way you get yourself off with something as pathetic as a pillow.

“Uh-uh,” comes a warning tut, forcing your eyes up. Harry is frowning, head cocked to the side. “Panties off, mama. You know better.”

You do know better, and you nod mutely as you warily grab hold of your shorts to tug them down, your underwear following suit.

Now left in nothing but your thin tank top, you return to your position on the floor, hands on your thighs as you kneel before the pillow.

The men are far too relaxed as they settle back into the cushions, looking down at you with smug appreciation.

“Come on, Sugar,” Harry pushes, once more encouraging you to begin. “Haven’t got all day.”

And Asher smirks at this, arms crossing over his chest, focused eyes glued to yours.

So, with a deep inhale, you scoot forward, grabbing onto the pillow to angle it the way you need. Then, you straighten up a bit, pushing and fluffing the cushiony fabric just so before pulling it between your thighs. 

Once it’s in the right place and you feel comfortable in your straddle…you lower.

You can’t help but gasp as your cunt makes contact with the pillowcase, the soft yet somewhat rough material like ecstasy as it slides between your bare, silky folds. 

The boys are quiet. Far too quiet for your liking. Not even a hum of approval or a look of excitement. They watch you like they’re watching the daily news. Intrigued yet hardly fascinated. 

You suppose this is a part of your punishment, but it breeds something insatiable in your stomach. Making you want to earn their interest and admiration.

You begin to rock yourself back and forth. A steady rhythm, just to get started. The need you’ve been fighting for weeks returns tenfold, growing stronger with each brush of your clit against the side of the fabric.

Then, Harry speaks.

“Talked to Cal today,” he says to his partner, glancing over as if somehow, that conversation is more important than watching you soak the pillow between your legs.

It makes you frown.

“Yeah?” Asher responds, looking over as well. 

Harry nods. “He’s working on expanding the shipment. Said he found a way in.”

“Good. You think he can handle it?”

“Probably not, but that’s why it’s not the actual shipping container. I’m leaving that to you.”

Asher laughs, and the amused sound makes your stomach clench. “And what’ll you do if he finds out you’re testing him?”

“If he’s really on our side, he’ll understand,” Harry says simply. “And if he has a problem with it…we’ll take care of it.”

The ominous threat has you whining softly in the back of your throat as you squeeze your eyes shut and work your hips a little faster.

This time, Harry chuckles. “She’s cute, isn’t she?”

“Very,” Asher replies, and even without seeing them, you know they’re smirking at you. “Maybe she should disobey more often.”

“Maybe,” Harry agrees. “It’s more fun this way.”

Your head lifts, attention finding them as you plead with your boyfriend to have a little mercy on you.

But the second he sees you looking, he smiles and shakes his head.

The living room falls silent for just a moment as you continue to thrust against the material in search of more.

It’s building, slow at first and then really fast. A very prominent wet patch has begun to form and knowing you’ve most likely ruined this poor pillow makes you whimper as you arch your back.

Your knees slide on the carpet, spreading you open. Over and over and over you rut against the cushion, breathless and panting for air.

And it's nice. Tantalizing, in a sense. But it will never be the real thing. Never be able to satiate your appetite the way you want. Can't fill you, or fuck you, or leave you.

Yet, despite its faults, it helps get you there. And maybe you should have been doing this all along.

Harry’s focus glues to you now, eager to see you come, and it makes your heart soar as you sneak a glimpse of his handsome face. Punishment or not, having his eyes on you is like an honor. Knowing that he could be looking at anyone…but he’s looking at you.

Your orgasm rips through you like a tornado, tearing your insides apart as you practically collapse on the floor. Hips twitching while you attempt to ride it out.

Again, a certain quiet settles over the room, and you feel relieved to know you’ve completed this little exercise, no matter how degrading. You’re ready to jump up onto your feet, crawl into his lap, and bury yourself in his arms for the remainder of the night.

But it seems Harry has other plans, and he hums condescendingly when he sees you begin to sit up.

“Where you goin’, mama, hm?” he calls.

You blink.

“You’re not done yet,” he says, far too pleased for your liking. “In fact, you’re not done until I say you’re done.”

…shit.

“So, go on,” he instructs, once again nodding at you. “Give me another.”

With that, he leans back against the couch, leaving you to wilt under the stares of the two men above you. 

Shaking slightly from the aftershocks, you squirm a bit over the pillow and steady your stance. Then, with a deep breath, you lower yourself back down and drag your pussy over the side of the fluffy material. 

But you’re incredibly sensitive, and you instantly lift up with a mewl as you attempt to get away from the sensation.

“Sugar,” Harry warns, “s’part of your punishment, and you know it. You gonna make Daddy even more upset?”

It takes all your strength to whisper, “No,” before you begin again.

Pleased, they return to their previous conversation, allowing you to twitch atop the cushion as you whine and cry out pathetically from the overstimulation.

Your poor, puffy clit is rubbed raw against the pillowcase yet even through the slight pain, you feel relief. Because this type of ache makes you excited. Makes you want to find reprieve and drives you toward the end. 

So it’s not too difficult to work yourself back up, now grinding against the floor as though you’re a rabid animal in heat.

Your legs are sore, knees bruising from the harsh sting of the carpet. But you don’t mind. You can see how proud Harry is of you, even if he’s not always watching.

This is your punishment. And if taking it like a good girl will make him happy, you will. Take anything he gives you.

The second one is slower to form and unravel but it’s still just as potent. It forces a shudder to roll down your spine as you moan lewdly and tremble from your spot on the ground.

Hoping that this will be enough and that he’ll have a bit of compassion on you, you glance up expectantly.

However, he simply runs his tongue over his bottom lip.

With a slight sink in your stomach, you press your palms into the floor and readjust your straddle.

It aches a lot more now. And it’s so bad, it’s good. Tears are quick to slip down your cheeks as you writhe and buck against the fabric, joints strained, and pussy abused. It's damp between your legs. And while the idea is invigorating, you don't know how much more your body can handle.

“Please,” you whisper, glancing up through the water in your lashes to plead with the man before you. “Hurts.”

“Does it?” he coos, frowning some but it’s incredibly condescending. “Does it hurt as bad as you lying to me?”

You shiver again, choking on a soft, pathetic whimper as you continue to gyrate along the edge of the material. “Daddy, please—”

“No.” It’s so simple, it makes your stomach flip. “Keep going.”

“Please—”

“Mama,” he warns lowly, and a fresh wave of arousal seems to rush between your thighs. “Begging won’t help you today. You’re gonna keep going until I tell you to stop.”

So with a pitiful cry, you continue your thrusts along the pillow, chest heaving from the deep breaths you’re attempting to take.

Harry watches you closer now. Perhaps to make sure you’re all right, and knowing that he’s still worried about you, even when he’s dominating you, is all you need.

You try to make the most of your punishment. Try to get yourself to the next one the way he wants. And it almost kills you, but you carry on. Lowering your shaky fingers toward your cunt as you scoot up to make room.

You circle them around your clit a time or two, indulging in the way it feels. It’s not as teasing as a pillow and it makes you clench in a desperate flutter as you begin to thrust against your hand.

“Uh-uh,” he suddenly calls, a low bark of disapproval. “Did I tell you to touch yourself?”

And you could practically disappear through the floor from the chasting tone of voice as you glance up. “Need to—”

“No,” he repeats, just as unrelenting. “Move your fucking hand.”

“Please—”

“I said no. Would you like to make this worse?”

And that’s the last thing you want. Because the look in his eye tells you he’d happily leave you untouched for weeks on end if that’s what it took to help you learn.

And you’d rather this pain than that.

With a mangled gasp, you pull your fingers from your soaking pussy and instead raise them to your chest. Needing to please him somehow, and he’s always been privy to your breasts.

You take hold of the low-hanging neckline on your tank top and rip it down until your left tit is revealed. Then, you squeeze it in your hand—tight. Groping the delicate flesh as you rut atop the pillow. Exactly the way he asked.

You vaguely catch the way both men shoot you smug looks of approval, endlessly entertained with this little display as you’re left to your humiliation on the ground by their feet.

So, you switch your focus. Linger on the tent in your boyfriend's pants as you picture how hard he must be about now.

You're pleased that this degrading act of remorse is turning him on. And you wish, more than anything, that he'd take out his cock and present it to you.

You'd suck him into your mouth eagerly. Flick him with your tongue before dragging it along the underside. He'd be heavy and warm between your lips. His fingers would bury into your hair as he forced himself down your throat, making you swallow around him.

And he'd groan through gritted teeth. Praise you the way he loves to do. Or maybe he wouldn't. Maybe he'd tell you how fucking pathetic you look with spit dribbling down your chin. Tell you that you can do better. That you need to be better to make him come.

The mere thought makes you stutter, sucking in a sharp inhale as you work your tit and cunt faster to the thought of him.

Always to the thought of him.

“That’s it,” Harry says, tossing both arms over the back of the sofa while his legs spread apart. “What a cute, pathetic little bunny, hm? Look at you, humping your poor pillow just to get some relief. Bet you like it, don’t you? Like showing us how desperate you are?”

You moan again as his words instantly and expertly work you back up that peak.

“Should I start calling you Bunny?” he continues, and Asher grins. “Are you my naughty Bunny, baby?”

Your eyes roll back, hips stuttering through the pace you’d begun to set as you cry a little harder and fight to keep going.

“Please,” you whisper, head shaking quickly. “Can’t…can’t do it—”

“Yes you can,” Harry corrects, a bit harder but still laced with encouragement. “Know you can, sugar. Come on—”

“No…no, hurts. Can’t—”

“Keep going,” he says. “Make us proud, Bunny. Don’t you wanna make Asher proud?”

And you can’t even look at the man in question because you’re so humiliated and so overcome with about ten different emotions. Instead, your focus finds the floor as you suck in a shaky breath.

“You’re all right, sweetheart,” you hear Asher offer, and it makes you whimper as you force your head up.

He’s smiling at you. It’s incredibly proud although still haughty, and it does something to this desperation you’ve already begun to succumb to.

“Go on,” he adds, and you drop to your elbows.

You become deranged. Yearning for this release more than anything in the world. 

You’re a blubbering mess, practically collapsed on the ground as you roll your hips at a swift pace.

“Please,” you whine again. “Need…can’t—”

“Shh,” Harry murmurs, now leaning forward as he rests his arms over his knees to peer down at you. “You’re okay. One more, Bunny, come on.”

This praise and encouragement are nice but not nearly as nice as the smell of him as he gets closer. You’d do anything to feel his hands on you. In any capacity. Do anything to have him hold you. Or kiss you. Or just make it better.

“Think of it as my face,” he adds, and you whimper just from the thought. “Know you love to ride my face, don’t you, mama? So go ahead. Ride that pillow like it’s me, yeah? Make me happy.”

It shouldn’t work so well, but it does. You can already picture the glistening of his chin. The puffiness of his lips, all swollen and red from how he’s licked you clean. The way he’ll pull your clit into his mouth by his teeth before releasing it. How he’ll scratch down your ass to keep you stuck to his tongue.

He’s always so good. So fucking good to you and the moment you imagine it…it hits you.

The noises you make are loud and incoherent, and you feel as though your body is being ripped apart by the cruel hands of the sadistic men before you. Despite the fact that they aren't even touching you.

You begin to weep dramatically the minute it subsides, which is only a second or two later, and instantly, Harry is dropping onto the floor in front of you.

“Okay, okay,” he whispers, quickly pulling you into his arms as Asher crouches as well to pull the pillow out from between your legs. Relieving you of the stimulation. “You’re okay, sweet girl. M’right here. You’re okay.”

He tucks your head under his chin as he strokes your back and cheek for comfort. And it’s so perfect. All you’ve ever wanted, but you can’t stop crying. Even if you aren’t inherently sad. 

You don’t know what you are.

“I’m sorry, Daddy,” you gasp, nose nuzzling into his shirt. Comforted by the warmth of his chest. “I’m sorry. Didn’t wanna make you angry. I’m so sorry—”

“Baby,” he exhales, holding onto you tighter. “I’m not angry. Promise. Could never be angry with you—”

“I hurt you,” you whimper, and you feel his breath catch. “I hurt you, Daddy. I’m sorry. Didn’t mean to hurt you. Was trying to be good. Trying to be patient—”

“Oh, my darling love,” he whispers, pulling you away from his body only so he can shower your face with kisses. “I know, baby, I know. You are so good to me. So patient, so kind. You’re okay. We’re okay.”

Your fingers clutch onto his dark button-up as though he’s going to let you go. “I’m sorry—”

“Don’t have to be sorry,” he hushes you, eyes flicking to Asher as they exchange a certain look before Harry is nodding once and Asher is standing to his feet. “It’s okay. It’s over, yeah? I’m here.”

You sniffle as you watch the other man go, lashes filling with water again. “Where’s he going? Did I make him mad?”

“Never,” Harry tells you, nuzzling his nose against your cheek and snaking his arms even tighter around your frame. “Never, mama. He’s just getting the bed ready.”

You look back, blinking some of the wetness away. “Oh? What for?”

“I wanna hold you,” he says simply, leaving another kiss to your bottom lip to help it stop quivering. “Haven’t gotten to hold you in forever. Just wanna sleep with you in my arms for a bit. Is that okay? Can Daddy do that?”

“Yes,” you say quickly, nodding. “Wanna make you happy.”

“You do, sugar,” he chuckles but it sounds sad. “Always make me happy. You’re my favorite fucking thing in the whole world.”

It’s exactly what you’d needed to hear, making you blush the entire way to the bedroom as both boys help you get settled under the covers. 

Harry instantly pulls you into his chest the moment the two of you have laid down, but before Asher can offer you your privacy…you’re thrusting a hand toward him.

“Stay,” you call quietly, lips pushing into a pout. 

He freezes in the doorway.

“Stay?” you repeat, eyes pleading with him. “Please?”

He looks toward his boss, who frowns a bit before nodding once, allowing him to return to the bed.

Asher is gentle as he takes a seat on your other side. Almost as if scared to cause a rift in the dynamic.

But you simply smile and hum as you nuzzle back into Harry’s embrace.

“There,” Harry smirks, keeping you close. “Better?”

��Better,” you whisper, already drifting off. “Thank you, Daddy.”

“Always,” he whispers back, pressing his mouth to your forehead and keeping it there until you fall asleep.

And it’s better than any dream in the world. 

Next Part:

~ Red* (An Extra)

Previous Part:

~ Remedy*

~ Full Mine Masterlist

~ Other Harry Blurbs

~ Full Masterlist

Taglist: @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite @keepdrivingkisses @swiftmendeshoran @tiredinwinter @straightontilmornin @justlemmeadoreyou @harrysdaydreams @tiaamberxx @peterparker1sgf @myfavfanficsever @littlenatilda @vamprry @fdl305 @tchalametishot @ssaama @indierockgirrl @likeapplejuicenpeach @acesofspadess @stylesfever @narry-heart @virginvirgo @pagesfalling @creativelyeva @char112244 @snwells @finelinesss

[l0bulariia]

the art of hatred - h.j.

while in a psychology class, you are faced with the cardinal sin of upper education; a group project. to make matters worse, your partner is the definition of a "douchebag."

Warnings: first person pov, female reader, uni!stray kids au, han being a general douche, self deprecating speak, hyunjin being hyunjin, reader being slightly egotistical, angst (only if you squint really hard), frat boys, underage drinking, mention of harassment (jokingly), negative speak of greek life, pet names used (jagi, baby, sweet thing)

back to m.list <3

ah! my first (public) fic!! i really hope you all enjoy this because it was genuinely so fun to create. i am so sorry this took so long to come out, i ended up catching the flu over my spring break and this fic kinda took the back burner. i am hoping to get part 2 out on monday!! AHH enjoy!

word count: 3.7k

SC count: 7

The monotony of schooling has never been lost on me. The mindless day and night cycles of spending too much time procrastinating and then stressing about the growing to-do list on my desk which leads to too little sleep only to restart the cycle when the sun rises again. There was very little I could do that would break me out of the downward spiral into my educational burn out that I constantly flung myself into. All of this was true until my psychology 201 class. 

The professor, a middle aged man who bragged about his kids accomplishments and dressed like a cartoon character every Monday and Wednesday at 11:30 A.M. strolled into the lecture hall as per usual. He donned a yellow polo and his classic khaki slacks, all fitted together with the same beaten loafers that I swore were, somehow, cemented to his feet. I definitely didn’t mind this class. It was always easy enough to understand, the assignments never felt burdensome even with the massive habit I have for procrastination, and everyone decently kept to themselves, bar someone needing a pencil here and there from the row behind where I sat in my unassigned-assigned seat. 

I would consider myself a good student. Always keeping my gpa high, attending extra lectures and seminars when the need arises, turning in work on time, introducing myself to professors and faculty, something my roommate insisted was important for “marketing myself.” Being in my second year at a state university, I didn’t see much need for it, especially in a class that I was simply taking for the prerequisite credit, but I went along with it anyway. It couldn’t hurt being on a first name basis with a professor if I ever needed an extension on homework, right? I had decided on this school, along with my major, while I was still in grade school, deciding that a sensible degree in human resources would get me just far enough in life to support myself while still leaving space for the things I truly wanted to do. 

When my mind chose the reasonable and “safe” route, my heart still yearned for the pull of the arts. My vice? Painting. A hobby that had turned into something of a near addiction by the time I reached my last year of highschool, as well as a hobby that had brought me my very best friend, Hwang Hyunjin. A string bean of a man, Hyun had seen my sleeve covered in streaks of an emerald green paint at a university welcome event during our first week of freshman year and nearly exploded in excitement at the prospect of having a friend who shared his love for painting. From that day on it had been constant texts, trips to the dining hall, hours spent in the intramural art studio, drives to the local convenience store for snacks, anything and everything. I was grateful to have met him, no matter how often his and my friends were convinced we were something more than friends, neither of us had ever even considered it. Frankly, to the both of us, it would be like dating my sibling. Unfortunately for me, Hyun was not in this class with me meaning I was bored the majority of the hour and a half lecture, spending time doodling in a sketchbook more than I was paying attention to the words plastered on the powerpoint. 

It was only when my professor uttered the words “group project” did I rip my eyes away from the anatomy practice that was scribbled over the canvas paper in front of me. Suddenly, this man had dropped from my highest ranking professor in the category of likeability to the lowest. He had committed the cardinal sin of large lecture classes. I let out a low grumble as he excused the class to open up the sheet of names he had added into the online course, listing the pairs of students working together. Scanning the document for my name I discovered that I was paired with a “Han Jisung,” a name that was as unfamiliar to me as the other 150 other names on the document. With a shrug I copied down his university email and number with the plan to message him to introduce myself and set up a time and place to work on the presentation once I was back in my dorm for the night. 

The rest of the class droned on until professor polo-shirt dismissed us, reminding us to connect with our partners “sooner rather than later!” I packed my things back into my bag, slinging the tote in which mostly contained art supplies over my shoulder and started my route to the creative art building on the other side of campus. Headphones over my ears, I drown out the sound of lively chatter throughout campus with whatever podcast was highly recommended to me by my roommate for the week. This is only until I come face to face with my biggest dread when it comes to attending a large university, the fraternities fundraising in the campus square. This degenerate sight physically pained the academic portion of me, seeing my peers dance around shirtless, getting pelted with paper plates of whipped cream all in the name of raising a few dollars. I tuck my head into my chest and pick up the pace to avoid any unwanted attention, which was normally a successful adventure. Until I felt the unmistakable wet, sticky feeling of sweetened cream slide down my arm. 

I let out a disgusted gasp, snapping my eyes up towards the table of barely dressed men, all now wearing a look of shock as I stare daggers into every single one of them. After a painfully long moment, one of the members, a short, shaggy haired boy emerges from the gaggle of idiots clutching his stomach as he doubles over in laughter. It is at that moment when I consider throwing away any chance at a sensible life for one of murder and jail time as I feel the slimy, warm whipped cream slide down my arm and onto my tote bag. My attention moves to him as he walks towards me, still laughing as he attempts to get out, possibly the worst apology I have ever heard in my 20 years on this planet. 

“So sorry, baby! Little bit of friendly fire there.” The cackling boy finally manages out.

“Yeah, I can see that.” I reply, moving my unscathed hand to the arm to scoop off the remaining sweetness and flick it to the ground before it dries. The boy watches my hand closely, turning back and giving a smirk to his brothers as he takes another step to me, gripping my arm loosely in his hands.

“Allow me…” He spoke, his voice lowering to the most abhorrent fake-sultry tone that makes me imagine all of the poor girls who had fallen for it in the past. He takes the corner of his shirt which was hanging from his belt loop and wipes the area of my arm coated in a sweet sheen, his eyes darting between my eyes and my lips. At this I reel back, ripping my arm from his grasp, my blood now boiling. 

“You’ve clearly done enough. Go back to… whatever that is…” I spit out the words with barely contained venom as I turn my back to the crowd of men, all now cackling at the actions of their member. I decide, for once, to leave it there, moving back to continue my walk to the studio as I hear them guffaw at my borderline harassment case in the making. As I move my headphone back over my ear, I hear the same man who had “helped” me yell over the growing laughter.

“Come back whenever you want, sweet thing!” 

With a roll of my eyes, I keep walking, waiting for the safe, stale air of the art studio to be around me once again.

“I couldn’t believe the audacity! I mean, if you're going to throw around whipped cream, of all things, at least have a tarp down so people don't have to step in it!” I pace around the easel that Hyunjin is working at as I rant, my hands thrown up in frustration. “And he had the bright idea to yell after me as I clearly wanted nothing to do with his little… party trick!” Hyunjin just hummed in response, a look of amusement on his lips as he placed his paintbrush down and leaned back on his chair, watching me as I walked circles around him. 

“Let me get this straight. You caught a stray glob of whipped cream, and that led you to consider murder?” He held back an obvious laugh, knowing it would bring me back to earth from my angry bubble of nerves. “Jagi, it’s only Monday. I don’t think there is enough spite in the world to keep you going at this pace.”

I shoot a playful warning look at him as I pull a stool up to my own unfinished painting, staring at it as a huff leaves my lips unintentionally.

“It's the principal, Hyun. They think they can just do that because they paid for a group of friends as equally stuck up and dickish as they are!”

All Hyunjin can do is laugh as I let out another grumble and turn my attention to the canvas in front of me, picking up my paintbrush to continue the garden scene I have now been attempting to perfect for over three weeks now. I feel every worry and sliver of annoyance slip away as I guide the brush strokes over the canvas, keeping quiet yet thoughtful conversation going with my best friend. 

I paint for another hour until I look over to Hyunjin’s easel seeing that he had since abandoned his canvas, yet again, to sit on the floor, his overly loved sketchbook in his lap as he traces shapes over the papers.

“Dining hall?” I question, wiggling my eyebrows at him in a mock suggestive way, sensing his boredom even from a few feet away. He lets out his signature excited squeal, even for the sub-par substance our school calls “food” we unfortunately pay way too much for, as he gathers his things, quickly shoving them aside to stand up. I pack up my own belongings and we walk over to the cafeteria. Our days since becoming friends have always been easy, never doing too much to overwhelm us in addition to our course work. I like the life I have created for myself, even if it is a few hours from what I still consider home. 

Our night ends as it always does, sitting on the floor of my dorm, food sprawled across my carpet, his laptop open and playing a Netflix show both of us have sworn we would pay attention to but never do. My dorm became our hangout spot quickly when my roommate met her boyfriend a few weeks into our freshman year, opting to spend most of her nights at his place instead of the room she was supposed to inhabit. I never complained, even though we had been friends long before we became roommates, her incessant cries for me to “find my person” and “live a little” began to sound like nails on a chalkboard. I knew her intentions were good spirited, even if me getting a boyfriend was mostly for her gain so that we could go on her coveted double-dates, however I had told her from the beginning I was at university to get my degree, not a hookup buddy. I let out a sigh as I rolled off of my place on the floor, reaching for my laptop and opening it to the same screen it had been left on since my psychology class ended earlier in the afternoon. 

“I still can’t believe my professor is damning me to hell by assigning this random group project. Who even does that?” My complaints are met by a shrug from Hyun as his attention stays on the pint of Ben and Jerry’s in his hands, scooping away at the chocolate ice cream gleefully. I type out a text to the number I wrote down earlier, deciding now was as good of a time as any to get the ball rolling on the project, even if it wasn’t due for another few weeks. 

I scoff at the message sent back to me, placing my phone on the ground to set aside the annoyance I felt resurface at the blatant dismissal. 

“This project is going to be a nightmare.” I groan, laying back onto the ground, my hands dragging down my cheeks. “Who even assigns group projects in lectures anyway! I don't know any of those idiots! Why does my grade have to depend on them?” I shove my phone closer to Hyunjin, flipping over onto my side to watch him as he reads over the text.

“Oh, ew. Good luck with whatever stick is shoved up your partner’s ass.” He pushes the phone back over to me as I let out another frustrated noise. Great, two annoying men in one day. What could be worse.

Four days have now passed since I had heard from my project partner, and my displeasure for him has only grown. Since the text on Monday, I have already started the work deciding to just get my part started so that when I finally do get a reply I have a better idea of what needs to get done. As I sat in a study room inside of the creative art building I hear my phone chime.

God… This dude was still a prick even after blowing me off when I wanted to meet earlier in the week. I swallow any other choice words I may have for my mystery psychology partner and turn my attention back onto my laptop, finishing the outline for my section of the project I had pretty much assigned myself. The project would be simple enough as long as my partner cooperated, which now seemed like a fleeting wish. Letting out a sigh I continue working, my mind drawing pictures of what this shit show of a project was going to turn out like.

I rounded the corner into the business building at 11:47 the next day, deciding to get there a bit early to ensure there was a study room available. Finally securing one of the rooms in the back of the building and pulling out my laptop and pulling up whatever resources would be needed for the project, shooting my partner a text to inform him of where to meet me. To pass the time I began sketching an idea for another landscape that Hyunjin had told me to attempt.

I watch as the clock hits 12:48, my hands gripping the pencil in my hand so tight, I think it might break. He’s late. What else did I expect? Pulling my phone out once again, I text him again, holding back any rageful curses, just barely. It takes him an exorbitant amount of time to reply, and when he finally does, I only see red. 

When he finally shows up, I nearly bolt out of the room. Of course. Of course it's the same, shaggy haired, cretinous, nuisance of a man that I had the displeasure of interacting with in the campus square at the beginning of the week. He now stands before me, reeking of stale, cheap bear, sporting the most egregious hickey on the side of his neck in a backwards cap and a somehow wrinkled hoodie. 

“How nice of you to show up.” I finally mutter as he enters the room, slumping over into the chair opposite of me.

“Nice to see you again, baby. I would have been here sooner but the brothers and I threw last night. Ended up drinkin’ a bit too much.” The smirk he is wearing makes my very insides turn inside out, either that or the smell of the cheap perfume that still lingered on him from his night-time escapades. 

“That much is obvious.” I scoff, waking up my laptop that had been abandoned in his tardiness. “Lets just figure out who has to do what so you can go back to whatever hangover activities you were attending to.” 

Han sucks in a breath through his teeth, moving his hand over his heart in mock hurt. “Hurts me to have you think I get hungover, sweet thing.” 

I just roll my eyes at him and push my laptop closer, showing him the outline I had prepared previously explaining to him the parts that I wanted him to complete. After a while of me talking and him trying to use what I can only describe as stereotypical “charm,” on me, he leans back in the chair, lacing his fingers behind his head with a look of confusion written clearly on his face.

“See, baby, I was thinkin’ that you could just… yaknow, do that part for me. Be a team player, yeah?”

“You're being facetious, right..?” I question, jaw half clenched as I get the words out. Taking in the look on his face I can tell he is, in fact, being dead serious about me doing every portion of this project.

“Look, I don't even know what that word means… Do you really want your name tied to mine on a project like this? I couldn’t tell you the last time I actually showed up to anatomy.”

“This is for psychology class, you…” I bite my tongue before I can call him every fowl name in the book. I let out a sharp sigh, pinching the bridge of my nose as I try my best to calculate the next words that are about to come out of my mouth. “I am submitting this project with my name on it whether you do your part or not. But I refuse to do the work of two people. You and the brothers of Alpha Epsilon… whatever, can keep your hands away from a girls tits for two days while you do your part of the project.”

“It’s Sigma Kappa Zeta, and I’m just saying, your grade, and mine by default, would be better if you just did the project.” He corrects me, as if I genuinely care about the name of his stupid paid friend group. I get to a point where if I have to listen to him for another moment I will claw my eyes out right here in the study room. I close my laptop abruptly, causing him to flinch in his chair, his eyes wide and locked on my movements. In one quick motion, I shove my laptop back into my bag, throwing it over my shoulder and standing from my space in the room.

“Do the project or don’t, just know that I am not doing it for you.” The not so well contained anger that laces into all of my words definitely sparked some sort of fear in the brown haired boy as I walked quickly out of the room and back into the main atrium of the business building. 

If I am anything, I am a woman of my word. The entire rest of my weekend was spent working on my portion of the project and nothing more. Formulating slides for the presentation, ensuring that my research was concrete, everything was cited in proper notation. I didn’t leave a single point of the rubric untouched. I wanted to give Han the benefit of the doubt, hoping that maybe, just maybe, he would have taken my little outburst as a warning and actually done his portion of the work. I shared everything he would have needed in his email, but nothing more. But as the weeks leading up to the due date wore on, I saw no new activity in the shared documents. There was a gnawing feeling of guilt that lingered in the smallest corners of my mind at how I reacted to his mostly mindless request until I reminded myself that he was also a grown man. He didn’t deserve to be babied through college, no matter how dim-witted he came off. 

The day of the presentation came quicker than I expected as my workload nearly doubled before my eyes. The last week and a half became a blur of midterm papers, stupid assignments that left me more confused than not, and some of the worst wine hangovers i've ever experienced thanks to Hyunjin’s new fake ID. As I took my seat in the lecture hall, I spotted Han entering through the side door, ego emanating off of him like cartoon stink lines. Just as I had expected, he hadn’t even opened the document that I had sent him so I submitted it to our professor unfinished and only with my name on it, along with a lengthy email drafted in my notes when I inevitably have to submit my peer review. 

The rest of the student’s presentations nearly put me to sleep as I mindlessly scribble in my sketchbook, awaiting my turn to completely embarrass Han. And when that fateful moment finally rears its head, it's just as glorious as I had expected. We walk to the front of the hall from our respective seats. Him clad in an unironed button up shirt and slacks, me in my most business casual dress from the very back of my closet. I begin by introducing the topic, giving the prepared background and flipping through my slides with practiced ease. It was clear to my professor that I had put in effort and time, rightfully so. But once Han’s slides appeared on the projector in front of the entire hall, his face paled. I bite back the shit eating grin I know is forming on my lips as I watch him flounder at the sight of the empty slides. Small snickers can be heard from around the classroom, the more astute students whispering to one another about his clear unpreparedness. This beautiful scene carries on for another 30 seconds or so until our professor loudly clears his throat, dismissing us back to our seats. 

Once I am out of view from Han, I can't hold back my smile any more, cheeks burning as the muscles contract further than I think they ever have. Sweet, sweet revenge. My phone vibrates against my desk and as I turn it over, the messages that plastered my lock screen only made my smile grow. 

[legendary-pink-dot]

No Better, No Worse

Pairing: Francisco "Catfish" Morales x Santiago "Pope" Garcia x female reader

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: Blindfolds, restraints, someone asking you to choose between 2 hot men and how dare you

Word Count: 866

Summary: "You're seeing TWO guys? Which one is, you know, better?" It's a simple question, but there's no right answer.

Notes: No use of "Y/N". No mention of Frankie's child.

"You're seeing TWO guys?" whispered your new friend, her tone equal parts shocked and weirded out. "Which one is, you know, better? Not just in bed..."

It's a simple question, but there's no right answer. 

Reducing it to "Well, one of them holds me down while he fucks me hard" and "But the other one goes down on me until I have to beg him to stop, that's just as good" would feel like cheating, somehow.

Thinking about them makes you smile as you grapple with the question: Frankie and Santi. Catfish and Pope. Santiago and Francisco. A pair of best friends and comrades, loyal and devoted. They're electricity and chemistry, and you need both to feel alive.

What a revelation that had been, dating one while becoming friends with the other, and suddenly one evening having that dynamic completely implode and form something new around you.

How Frankie had been a bit hesitant, letting you lead and tell him what you wanted, ever the detail-oriented soldier who prefers to follow, the calm pilot who immerses himself in whatever task is right in front of him. By contrast, Santi had dived straight in and arranged you into what he knew you wanted, as a planner who anticipates every need with a focused intensity that would have frightened you if he'd been anyone else. The sense of safety you felt around both of them had never been in question, despite the things they've done and what you knew they were capable of.

Santi's intensity unfortunately bled into his temper, running hot (but never dangerously around you) at the most trivial things, Frankie's quiet tones the only thing that could settle him. And you were the one who would always bring Frankie back to earth from the throes of his nightmares, more vivid and regular in the weeks after returning from a mission; you could always help him see what was real. In return they both took care of you, validating that your problems were important and mattered, even if they weren't life and death like theirs were. It became a closed circuit of care, flow and movement that would halt if one of you were to break away.

"Come on!" your friend prods. "You must have a preference, right?"

Both men have beautiful curls in their hair, perfect for wrapping around your fingers, at different times and for different purposes, and they both love it when you do. 

Two pairs of callused hands, their roughness patterned differently: Frankie had small indents on the sides of his fingers from years of gripping mechanic's tools, Santi with raised white scars slashing his olive skin from regular training with knives, his favourite combat skill and way to de-stress. Both felt incredible on every inch of your skin, at any pressure, in any configuration.

One night when they restrained you to the bed and put a blackout mask over your eyes, binding two of your senses, you were confident you'd be able to tell which one of them had those differently rough fingers and their tongue inside you. Just when you thought you knew, a wrong but familiar voice would whisper praise directly in your ear, sending you reeling and thrilling you extra at the same time, keeping you feeling alive and on the edge.

You also thought you would be able to tell which man was inside you, but in the end you didn't really want to. They kept the blackout mask over your eyes as they took turns sliding through your wetness and deep into you, switching frequently (or so you thought), both of their mouths spilling nonstop strings of filth to intentionally alter your focus, telling you what a good girl you were to take their cocks like this and how sweet your cunt was just for them. For both of them. The different sensations had fused into a singular, heat building in your core and the resulting climax setting off theirs, and your shared comedown created an abstract form in which concepts like separation and differentation no longer existed, the three of you sweaty and spent and a mess of tangled limbs.

"Seriously, if you were on the Titanic together and only one of them could share the floating door with you, which one would you choose?" Your friend can't believe that you still haven't taken a stand on this.

She doesn't understand, can't possibly know, that it's not just you and Frankie and then also you and Santi. It's you and Frankie and Santi. A higher value to all of you as a three of a kind rather than as a pair, and unable to remove one piece without breaking up the whole. But this isn't information your new friend needs to know; she was shocked and judgemental enough when you mentioned you were dating two men at the same time. The mere idea that you three subsisted together, needed each other in ways you were still coming to understand, would probably blow her mind. Best to keep that to yourself.

You finally settle on an answer that satisfies you. "I can't choose, and don't want to. There's no better and no worse. They're just... different."

[eddiecompetitiondiaz]

🔫🔫🔫

🥂

For the tag game ❤️

🔫 I can always count on you to hype up the hitman's bodyguard AU.

(Below snippet is a bit of what I was writing when we were doing sprints the other day, it might be a lil messy, it is also a lot more than 9 sentences lol)

-

Eddie stares “What is that?” 

Buck picks it up, checking it isn’t broken. “It’s my phone.” He shrugs. Surely Eddie knows he was given a phone. He’s seen Eddie on his own a bunch.

“Your phone?” Eddie snaps. Okay, so maybe he doesn’t know. “Are you serious? You can’t be that dumb.”

Buck is starting to get really pissed off with this guy. “Firstly, fuck you. Secondly, an agent gave me this phone, I assume they wouldn’t do that if it posed any risk?”

Eddie pauses. “An agent gave you that phone? Or Bobby gave you that phone?” 

“Well no.” Buck says “It was some other guy, he worked with Bobby though.”

Eddie suddenly seems to grow an extra few feet, because Buck is sure he’s staring up at the angry sneer directed his way. “He works with Bobby? Any chance you recall Bobby not trusting the people he works with? Kinda the whole reason he asked me to help you?” Eddie snaps. 

Okay, that does make a lot of sense actually, and maybe Buck would have spared it a second thought if the phone hadn’t been so vital to him. It’s the only way he can speak to Maddie. 

Eddie continues before Buck can respond. “You really thought they’d give you a phone? They wouldn’t even trust you out of handcuffs if it didn’t attract more attention than it was worth. 

Buck shoves him. Eddie’s back collides with the car but it doesn’t seem to stop him. “Give me your phone.” 

“No.” Buck snaps, stepping back. 

“No? Do you want to be killed?” Eddie yells, stepping forward.

Buck doesn’t answer. 

Eddie stops a few feet away, hand still outstretched as his face contorts into a grimace. He doesn’t say anything for a long moment and eventually, Buck holds the phone out, staring at it one last time. He might never get to hear Maddie’s voice again. His last string tying them together and Eddie is about to cut it.

He hands Eddie the phone. Silently, Eddie opens the sim tray and pulls it out. 

“Yeah,” Eddie says, this time he's quieter, hoarser. “Yeah, this can be tracked.” Buck turns away. He wants to start walking but he’s not sure which way to go. He opens the backseat door and pulls his bag out. “See mine has a ghost chip, that’s why-“

“Whatever,” Buck says, he shoves the gun into the front pocket of his duffle and starts walking in the opposite direction.

“That’s why” Eddie repeats “you can call your sister as much as you want on my phone without any risk.”

-

🥂 They (me) tried to keep the hangover AU down but she's still striving.

-

Eddie and Buck are sitting on a bench outside their wedding venue. Which is overwhelming by itself. Eddie’s got his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands. Buck's not sure if it’s out of stress from Albert being missing, the bad hangover they're all nursing, exhaustion or the news that he’s married to Buck. 

It’s all four probably. 

Buck can’t sit still, he’s tapping his foot incessantly, twisting the ring on his finger - he should take it off, right? - glancing over at the matching ring on Eddie’s - he hasn’t taken it off, so maybe Buck should leave it on - biting his lip at the sight - Buck doesn’t want to take the ring off, not ever - trying to look away again, failing.

“We’ll get it sorted, Buck,” Eddie grumbles, voice muffled in his palms. 

Eddie’s always comforting, he always knows how to calm Buck down, but just this once, just this once Buck wishes Eddie could have kept that fact to himself, that he could have lied and said something else. 

“Yeah, yeah, I know,” Buck says. He bites his lip again, twists the ring up and then pushes it back down on his finger until it’s tight enough that if he’s lucky, he might not be able to get it off again. He doesn’t need to tell Eddie that he’s got a ring cutter at home. 

[curiousquirks]

Day 7 | Mount Lady x F!Reader (18+)

Massage | Hair Pulling

Content Warnings: AFAB Reader, slight hair pulling, full body massage, Yu curses a lot

Word Count: 1,300

Summary: 

Yu has a stressful day at work but you know exactly what will help her unwind

You heard Yu long before you saw her. The slamming of the front door, the loud footsteps, the keys hitting the floor, the cursing that followed. She was clearly home and not having a good day. She let out a heavy sigh before you heard a shoe being thrown. Then another.

“Finally!” She exclaimed, sounding relieved. “Fuck! My feet are killing me.”

You came out of the bathroom, tying the strings to the robe around your body. It took her a moment to notice you, her attention set on attempting to get herself out of her skinny jeans. She was peeling them off of her hips before she accidentally made eye contact with you. Her eyes scanned your from top to bottom. She successfully yanked down her jeans, as you came closer to her. Your arms wrapped around her shoulders as you placed a chaste peck to her lips. 

“Rough day?” You asked, being met with her head immediately falling to your shoulder as she groaned.

“The worst!” She whined, wrapping her arms around your waist. “My agency had booked these shoots today but AFTER I needed to go for patrol which was a nightmare on its own. I couldn’t rebook anything.” She continued complaining as her head shot up as she started getting more heated. “Then the style department had the nerve to say my ass didn’t look good in those damn jeans either! After I had just spent two hours saving their asses, in heels no less. Not one of them appreciated anything I did or how hot I looked!”

She pouted, resting her forehead on yours before sighing again. “It was kind of a bad day…” She trailed off, closing her eyes.

“I’m sorry, Yu.” You cooed as you reached up to run your hands through her hair. “I barely got to see you in your jeans but you know how much I love your ass.” 

“And I love how much you love it. I just wish everyone would also appreciate it, damn it!” She whined again before she pulled back from you. She placed a kiss on your forehead before she moved away to take her shirt off. “I’m literally flaunting it and they have the fucking nerve not to look?!”

You undid your robe and let it fall to the floor, waiting for her to turn around again as she ranted. She picked up her clothes off the floor and spun around to move towards the bedroom when she spotted your naked body in front of her. She threw the clothes somewhere behind her before she stalked her way up to you. She was grinning but you put your hand up to stop her. She raised an eyebrow but before she could make any comment you pointed towards the bedroom.

“On the bed, I’m gonna massage all that tension out of you.” You explained, moving your way into the room yourself. “Help you relax.”

She was quick to follow, her underwear already having a growing wet spot. She hopped up onto the bed as she watched you grab a body of massage oil before crawling your way onto the bed. You gestured for her to lay down, waiting until she was laying on her stomach before you swung your leg over to straddle her backside. Your fingers moved up to unhook her bra, letting it fall to the sides.

You squeezed the oil over her back, a small squeak escaping her lips at the sudden cold contact. You giggled as you moved your hands down to start spreading the oil around her back. She was quick to relax into the bed as your hands slowly started working out the knots and built up tension in her muscles. 

She sighs as you press deeply into her back, her toes curling as your hands move towards her neck. Your fingers expertly work out the pain in her shoulders, your thumbs pressing into her neck to work out the tension there next. Yu moans as the relief evolves into pleasure as your fingers work at her tired muscles. 

“Fuuuck….” Yu moans, jolts of pleasure shooting directly to her pussy. You make sure to spend extra time in that specific spot, drawing out more moans from her. Her hips wiggle slightly below you. “Oh shit, ohh fuck it feels so good.”

“You like that?” You asked, knowing full well the answer already.

“Mhmm…” She whimpered as you pressed more into her shoulders in the exact right spot. Your name spilled from her lips. 

“Just let it out, baby. You deserve it.” You praised, moving back down her back. You leaned down, your breasts pressing into her skin. “Flip over for me.”

You moved off of her, letting her flip over onto her back. Her eyes were barely open, but still eagerly watching you pour more oil out onto your hand. You scooted down the bed and started applying the oil to her left leg, massaging the muscles which forced Yu’s eyes closed. She groaned as you worked out all the tension from all the running and everything she had to do today. She whispered praise after praise to you as you finished one leg and finished the other. She collapsed onto the bed when you let go of her other leg. She smiled up at you as moved to grab the bottle again, lifting it up to put some more on your hand. Her hand reached up to grab your wrist before she sat up. 

“Hang on a sec,” She said, grabbing the bottle from you. 

She lifted the bottle and let the contents drip onto your breasts. She let her hands move up your body before massaging the oil into your skin, groping at your breasts. She grinned as she pressed her lips to yours. You both melted into the kiss, her fingers kneading into your breasts drawing a moan from you. Your fingers snuck their way into her hair where they entangled themselves. She let her hands drop and wrap themselves around your body, grabbing at your ass instead. Her fingers dug in roughly as your fingers gripped and pulled at her hair. She groaned at the tug, your hand pulling on her hair to force her head back. You leaned down pressing your lips to her neck, your fingers roughly grabbing her hair to hold her in place as you nipped at her skin. 

“Fuck.” She moaned, her underwear absolutely drenched. Her clit throbbed with need. Yu squeezed her thighs together, desperate for any level of friction she could get. “You’re fucking driving me insane.”

You grinned into her skin, your other hand sneaking its way between her legs. She immediately parted them, your fingers pressing the soaked fabric into her folds. She closed her eyes at the contact, letting out a whine as you ran your fingers against her swollen clit. She tried letting her head fall back some but your other hand in her head held her still, tugging on her hair to remind her. 

“Stop teasing me, just fuck me already.” She whined, her hand finding your arm as she let her fingers dig into your skin. “I need you so fucking bad right now.”

You let go of her hair and in a swift motion pushed her back onto the bed. Your fingers hooked under the edge of her underwear and started tugging them down. “You’re so fucking hot, I just wanted touch every inch of your body. Worship you like you deserve, but hearing you beg for me…” You trailed off, throwing them somewhere behind you as you parted her legs. Her eyes were so dark with lust as she looked up at you, a beautiful flush across her skin. “I’m going to undo all that work I just did.”

[pbandjesse]

Today wasn't a terrible day. I don't feel as bad as I did. But I did a ton while I was feeling okay. Which I think just made me exhausted. But James is on their way home and I'm excited to see them. And then go to sleep.

I slept. Okay. I have decided to give myself an extra 10 minutes for every time I have to get up to pee so I woke up at 730. Which was fine. I wasn't in a rush and would still get to camp much earlier then anyone else.

James made us breakfast. And after I got dressed I came downstairs to sit with them. They were going to go to work at noon because of evening hours. And so we weren't in a rush. And James would get some tasks done in the house this morning which was nice to come home too.

It was raining this morning. And the drive in to camp sucked. It was a deeply unpleasant drive. I think I am almost getting car sick. Plus the windshield wipers. And the fog. And the rain. And the flashing lights. It was not a fun drive at all.

I arrived at camp in one piece. And collected my stuff to go inside. I brought the bear I have in the teddy bear hospital so I could brush them out. Which took most of an hour but I think they look great. I also checked in with the owner about the nose I have, to make sure she's happy with the size and color. I am going to work on the embroidery for the eyes tomorrow, but I needed to go to Michael's to color match the floss. But I felt like I was making great progress, and the owner is very happy so far.

I was finishing that up as Sarah came in. She laughed at my small umbrella. Yes it's child sized but it's a perfectly fine umbrella. But then everyone else teased me too! Lou said that it's elf sized, and Heather was like it's because Jesse is small!! And it was very silly. I was being roasted!

I would work on a few small things. I finished going through the York county private schools and then worked on a infographic for bracelet making for next week. Which honestly was my favorite thing I worked on today.

I also started working on a PowerPoint of things to know at camp. Slang and location and FAQ. I will need to sit down with Heather or someone to fill it out more. But it's a good start.

I took a walk up to arts to work on taking all the bracelet string out of its packaging. And counting out the looms. I had 83. I need 140. I would get 29 more cut out in the afternoon, working until my hands hurt. But I was glad I was able to get some stuff done.

I didn't want to ask for more tasks. I will probably ask tomorrow. But today I would just try and work on my own stuff. I did some research for programs for next year. I looked through some schedule stuff. I went and laid on the picnic table in the art building when I started not feeling good. I thought being flat for a bit would help and it did. But I was just. Done.

I was able to hold it together until right after 2. So I let Alexi know I was tired and she told me to go home and get some rest.

I did not exactly do that though. I went to hunt valley and got yarn at Michaels. I color matched the embroidery floss. I looked at all the Halloween stuff. And then after I paid, I dropped off my purchases and tried looking around HomeGoods. But it was overly packed and made me stressed so I left.

I went to goodwill next. But same problem. It was a mess, with carts everywhere. And I saw one thing I wanted but got stressed out and left pretty quickly.

I wanted to eat something. I thought I would go to Chipotle. I was practicing driving without the GPS and was able to get myself all the way to our neighborhood and to the chipotle but I changed my mind and went to five guys instead.

And honestly I'm glad I did. I would end up giving me a few hours of solid energy. I knew that as long as I didn't sit down when I got home I could accomplish a bunch.

And I did! I got home and would jump into putting things away. Cleaning the aquarium. Taking Crabcake out to walk around the studio while I worked on resetting his space. I put the dishes away. I took Ruby the Roomba upstairs. I got a package with another style of baby carrier. Which is accidently cut when I opened it but it's minor and fixable. I was going going going.

I got frustrated when I saw a shelf of paint in the studio has fallen and when I went to try and fix it, that shelf and the self below it both collapsed and everything went everywhere. So I was very upset about that.

There was nothing I could do in that moment though. I put things in baskets and put it to the side. The shelf would have to be repaired later I guess.

Instead I went and fed Sweetp dinner. And went to the basement to tidy up down there. I changed out the shelf next to the dryer, and tried putting things away where I could. We need another set of shelves down there but I think I did a pretty good job with what I had to work with. It's not perfect but it's something. I will need James help with some of the stuff I want to move but I am still proud of the work I put in.

I started sorting the sweaters. Which was still really stressful but I put some to the side and put the for sure keeps away. I still want to figure something out because I still have to many. But I tried.

I was getting overheated and I felt gross. So around 6 I took a cool bath. It helped. I left the AC on in our bedroom. And so when I got out of the bath I was able to just chill and it helped a lot.

I would have some leftover lasagna. And hung out with sweetp in our room. Watched videos and just enjoyed resting.

I'm laying on the couch now. James just got home and they are going to attempt to figure out fixing the shelf that broke. I love them for trying.

I am going to go give them a smooch and go upstairs to sip some water and get ready to sleep. I hope you all have a good night. Sleep well everyone. Have a nice day tomorrow.

[prince-rowan-of-the-forest]

Oh hey what if you wrote anaroceit with one of them(extra love if its janus) having a bad day and so they cuddle and take a nap together?

Fit For Kings

----

Janus is stressed out and overwhelmed by a discussion that quickly devolves into arguing, Roman sets about helping him - and Virgil too - out in the most extravagant and perfect way possible.

----

| Ao3 |

Warnings: one or two suggestive comments (if there's anything i should add please lmk)

Pairings: Anaroceit

Word count: 1596

Notes: Thank youuu for the prompt!! This was really fun to write and really got me back into the spirit I think, if anyone else wants to send me fluff prompts (or... any prompts at all) please hmu :D

I really hope this is good! haha, enjoy!

----

If they were just going to ignore him, Janus thought, then there wasn’t much point in him being there.

So he left, sank out back to his room without a word, flung his capelet and bowler hat unceremoniously onto a chair and snapped his fingers. His outfit, while so familiar, had become too hot, too itchy and almost outright unbearable as the conversation had gone on. It changed into a far too large black and purple sweater he had stolen from Virgil at some point and looser, more comfortable trousers too. He’d crawled helplessly onto his bed and wrapped himself tight in a blanket he had stolen from Roman’s room because he was - as Remus described him - a thieving little goblin and rocked gently back and forth in his little ball. 

It was okay, it would be fine. It wasn’t like this was a super important issue that could hurt Thomas’ mental health even more if it wasn’t sorted right. It wasn’t like Patton and Logan kept advocating against him because despite his ‘acceptance’ they still thought he couldn’t suggest anything helpful. 

So they were arguing with Roman who - while he was on his side and Janus was eternally grateful for that - didn’t exactly know the ins and outs of the situation, it not really being his department. And Virgil had already been having a bad anxiety day and left earlier in the discussion because arguing with Patton got so repetitive and frustrating and - well Janus wasn’t even sure how he himself had lasted so long.

And not to mention Remus had been there, which wasn’t… the most helpful, with the circumstances. He’d been riling up both Patton and Roman, and freaking Virgil out as he did so and honestly no wonder Virgil left when he did. Janus wanted to summon him, since everyone else was probably still arguing, but… he couldn’t deny that he felt a little bad about doing so when Virgil wasn’t faring well himself.

Maybe… less of a summoning, more of a gentle tug? Just to… let Virgil know he could come if he wanted to? But if he didn’t want to come, would he feel guilty and come anyway? But-

Whatever, he’d probably summon Virgil anyway if he started overthinking it too much. He sighed, closing his eyes and gently tugging on the mental string that kept them all connected as sides, whispering Virgil’s name down the bond before closing his eyes and burrowing into the blanket that he kept himself wrapped in. 

“Jan?” Virgil’s voice said, his head immediately popped up from the blanket to find Virgil standing next to his bed, “You okay? You called…”

Janus shrugged, reaching a hand out of his blanket cocoon for Virgil, who took it only to be pulled closer onto the bed. He yelped in surprise, before sitting up properly and moving closer until Janus could wrap the blanket around him too. 

For a moment, Virgil just wrapped his arms around Janus and nuzzled his face into his shoulder. Janus smiled, finally relaxing a little as he buried his nose in Virgil’s hair. Soft and fluffy as it always was. 

“Where’s Ro?” Virgil murmured. 

“Totally not still stuck with the others,” Janus whispered back, feeling as though he would break something fragile if he spoke any louder. He felt Virgil frown against his shoulder and pulled the blanket tighter around them both.

“Did it get too much for you too?” Virgil asked.

“No,” Janus said, “That’s why I’m still up there.”

Virgil chuckled and Janus thought that a win as the corner of his own lips tugged itself up into a small smile without him trying. 

“Is this his blanket?” Virgil asked after another moment of tense but comfortable silence. 

“What? No- definitely not - I’m no thief,” Janus denied reflexively. Telling the truth was always so much harder when he was overwhelmed. 

“And I suppose you’re no liar either?” Virgil asked with a small giggle, before gently tugging at the hoodie he was wearing, “Because this is definitely my hoodie.”

“You must be mistaken, Virgil,” Janus said, pressing a kiss to the top of his head, “Because this is my hoodie, always has been.”

“Of course of course,” Virgil rolled his eyes, “That totally explains why you give it back to me after it’s been washed and then steal it again, every single time.”

“It- it stops smelling like you when it gets washed.” Janus said, cheeks flaming, he didn’t realise Virgil had noticed!

“It’s ok,” Virgil said, smirking and squeezing him a little tighter for a moment, “I know you’re a little schemer, I think it’s cute.”

“Shut it,” Janus huffed, “I’m not cute.”

“But you still called me because you were sad and wanted cuddles?” Virgil said, “and you built a nest on your bed of stuff you stole from us?”

“Only comfy things,” Janus protested, as if that would help. Virgil snorted. 

“You’re not denying the rest though?”

“I deny everything.” Janus said, pressing his scaled cheek to Virgil’s hair. 

“D’you think Roman will come join us when he wins the argument?”

“What makes you so sure he’ll win?” Janus asked.

“Cause he’s Roman?” Virgil said as though it was obvious, “and he’s arguing your point, which was right, by the way, sorry I wasn’t more helpful, but he’ll win.”

“I’m glad you’re so confident in me, Virgil,” Said Roman, coming in through the door that very second, “And you’ll both be glad to know that I did, in fact, win the argument.”

“Hurrah,” Virgil said, raising a fist, Janus breathed a quiet side of relief, so they’d been able to avoid the mental health bullet in the end, “Join us?”

Roman grinned, not moving closer, “I would love to, dearest Stormcloud, but I have a better idea.”

“What could be better than cuddles in a blanket nest?”

“How about,” Roman said with a grin, “A luxury castle break for three?”

“Benifits of moving from this very comfortable cocoon being?” Janus asked, “C’mon Ro, advertise.”

Laughing, Roman walked over and sat down just a little ways away from them, “Onsite sauna, a banquet for just the three of us with anything you could possibly want, the comfiest beds, fit for kings, grand clothes, a guarantee than no-one will bother us until we choose to come back-”

Roman wiggled his eyebrows and Virgil found out that he was just out of punching range from their blanket cocoon.

“You had me at sauna,” Janus huffed, reluctantly peeling himself away from Virgil’s side, “Can I bring this blanket?”

“I certainly have enough blankets there-”

“I’m aware, I totally don’t want this one specifically.” Janus huffed, holding onto it a little tighter. Virgil chuckled and pressed a kiss to his cheek before scooting over to whisper something to Roman, who’s eyebrows shot up before he went bright red and ducked his head with a smile on his face. 

“Sorry, sorry, you can keep that blanket,” Roman said, clearly trying not to laugh, “Promise, now, c’mon, we’ve got a palace waiting for us!”

“I can’t walk,” Janus said, flopping back onto the bed, “Whatever will we do?”

“Well I suppose the only solution would be to take Virgil and leave you here by yourself-” Roman said, putting a finger to his chin as though he was pondering the issue. Virgil rolled his eyes and scooped Janus off of the bed, tossing him over his shoulder as though he were nothing more than a sack of potatoes. 

“Ah- hey!” Janus yelped as Roman picked up the blanket that had been left on the bed and gently draped it over him. Virgil laughed and patted his back gently. 

“This is what you get for trying to be slick.” Virgil said, before nodding to Roman, “Will you do the honours, my Prince?”

Despite the blush that once again overtook Roman’s face at the nickname, he stepped forward and put both hands on Virgil’s other arm, sinking the three of them out to the imagination together.

—-

Virgil put Janus down once they’d sank out, and Roman gently ushered them through the massive palace gateway. 

They’d gone to the sauna, taken a dip in the bath that looked more like a pool to Janus, with beautifully fancy tiled floors and modled golden faucets and so much bubblebath, afterwards they’d gone to the banquet hall to dine on a feast fit for kings. Janus almost forgot the upset from before, as Roman hand fed him chunks of some bread that tasted perfect - still soft and warm - and Virgil giggled as he drank soup straight from the bowl. He couldn’t help but think about how Roman had done such a brilliant job of distracting them and providing relaxation for all three of them, himself included. 

Something he definitely wouldn’t lie about was the way it made him want to kiss both his partners silly and he did just that the moment Roman brought them up to what may have been the most elegantly decorated bedroom he had ever seen. When they had later collapsed onto the fluffiest, most comfortable bed Janus had ever had the pleasure of lying in, both of his partners around him, cuddling each other tightly and Roman’s blanket from back in Janus’ room covering them along with heavy duvets that seemed to radiate the most comfortable warmth…

As he closed his eyes, Janus found he had forgotten entirely about the issue from before. Now as he drifted off to sleep alongside the sounds of their breathing, he felt nothing but safe and warm and happy as can be.

----

Tags: @full-of-roman-angst-trash @reptilianrapscallion420 @your-local-random-dino @cutebisexualmess @glacierruler @roseianxiety @bella-bugatti-frogetti-baguetti (if anyone wants to be added, let me know!)

[greatwyrmgold]

I have strong opinions about translating songs, derived in large part from listening to a lot of anime song covers. And I've been thinking about this because of "Useless Angel," the recent official English version of "DadadadaTenshi".

For comparison, here's the original Japanese. English subtitles are available.

Now, if you compare the official English lyrics to the translation of the Japanese lyrics, you'll notice a few things. The first is that the English grammar and pronunciation are...not exactly how a native speaker would say any of that. (It's not as bad as "Your Affection," you can definitely tell it's supposed to be English, but...writing the lyrics on screen is appreciated.)

Once you get around that, you'll notice that the lyrics are very different. For instance, the tenshi overcomes her uselessness with angelic power, while the angel uses her angel powers to overcome her flaws. Similar vibes, but the literal meanings are pretty different.

But if you were listening to the Japanese lyrics, you'll notice that the English lyrics sound very similar. "Dame [×4] na atashi wo; aishitene!" doesn't mean quite the same thing as "Darn it [×4] not a perfect girl; 'I love you' back!", but it has the same meter, same stressed syllables, and similar phonemes. "Useless Angel" doesn't always sound like it was written in English, but it does always sound like it was written with the melody in mind.

Most Anglophone anime song cover artists (or whoever they get their translations from) don't do this. They get a literal translation from some source or another, then find some way to contort that translation into the song's length, and that's it. Sometimes they don't even bother swapping synonyms around to make the syllable count match; they just get close enough and give some words extra notes or vise versa.

And that sounds like shit!

Lyrics aren't just a sideshow playing alongside the melody; they are the medium through which we hear the melody. Having lyrics that sound wrong—whether because of mismatched syllable count, mismatched syllable stress, or just trying to force words to blend together when they don't—is like playing an instrumental piece with out-of-tune instruments. Sometimes not even the right instruments—like, they didn't have a drummer, so the spare bassist just strummed their bass when the drummer should have hit a drum, and argh string instruments are terrible at percussion why are you doing this?

Song lyrics are not prose, they're poetry. They're art. Much like how anime subtitles should convey the essence of what the dialogue means over a literal translation of the words in the script, and much like how anime dubs need to follow the lip flaps even if that makes them deviate farther from the original Japanese, song lyrics need to be translated in a way that follows the song, that conveys the essence of how the song is supposed to feel.

Anyways, I can't stand most English anime covers, especially covers of songs I like. By contrast, I've been listening to "Useless Angel" on loop for days, interrupted mostly by "Dadadada Tenshi". Half of its lyrics are mumbled word salad, but none of them sound wrong.

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Dirty Laundry (Part I) || Doctor Strange x reader.

Word count: 3.6K Summary: After having sex with Stephen after a stressful operation, you gathered the courage to tell him you want to stop your little rendezvous. Warning: SMUTTY SMUT OVER 18s ONLY. angst. friends with benefits, degradation, praising, fingering, oral (female receiving), unprotected p & v sex, creampied. Strictly do not: claim, repost, copy, translate my stories anywhere else A/N: DON'T LOOK AT ME. I had a dream (but it wasn't a smut) where I was with Stephen in a laundromat- anyways welcome to my first smut story. I told myself I would never write smut because it ain't my specialty but here I am jgdjhdjcd. Will have a prt 2, not sure about part 3 though.

For the last couple of weeks, you’ve been under Stephen’s team as the on-call theatre nurse. He’s asked for you specifically because, one, you’re great at your job, and secondly, he couldn’t get enough of your late-night rendezvous in the hospital’s staff laundry area. It all began when you and Stephen got into a heated argument over a brand-new surgical instrument, which he had no clue how to use. One thing led to another, and since then you’ve been using each other to relieve stress. You promised each other no strings attached, but you couldn’t uphold your end of the bargain. You were falling hard for him, you’ve been in a dilemma about whether to tell him or not.

“Do you happen to have an extra quarter?” You asked Stephen, who was changing out of his scrubs.

It was already late, and it was really humid. You weren't often bothered by the fact that the laundry room was empty, but tonight you couldn't help but feel a little nervous since at this time of night there are typically other staff washing their clothes, but tonight there was just Stephen. If it weren't for the developing affection you have for the man, you wouldn't be experiencing these feelings at all.

“I sure do, but it’s going to cost ya.” Stephen answered flippantly. You rolled your eyes and attempted to turn, but instead you felt his tight grip on your arm, felt the chilly metal of the quarter pushing into your skin against your hand. His touch went right to your stomach, feeling like a sucker punch of lust. 

"Thanks," you muttered and then quickly slid the coin through the slot, then selected your settings, all in an effort to go back to your bag as fast as possible and get away from the uncomfortable heat that his lingering stare was inflicting on you. 

He followed your every move across the room as you both made your way across the tiled floor. Frustrated and nervous at the same time, you turned and boxed him back against the wall. Stephen was surprised but unfazed, your nervousness was clearly evident to him as you ran your fingers through your hair. 

Your height was average, Stephen's was far greater than yours. You raised your head and fixed him with the most intimidating gaze you could muster, “Is there something you want, Stephen?” 

His crooked grin appeared on his face, and he responded in a drawled tone with his silky deep voice, "Yes," and then looped his fingers around the belt you were wearing, bringing you closer to him, his mouth near your ear, “You.” 

It took just a few seconds for his lips to find yours before he twisted you around and pressed you against the wall with his shirtless body. His kiss was intense and molten, like the flow of lava. There is something about the way he kisses you that utterly entraps you, and your whole body burns with desire to be touched by him and only him.

You rested your hands on his sculpted chest and moved your hands over his shoulders till your fingers were entangled in his hair, tugging his head back slightly. Your reward for his deep smothered moan was to open your lips and let him taste you. 

Stephen glides his tongue into your mouth, allowing you to experience his desire for you. How insane you drove him to feel. You moaned into his lips, mirroring his hunger with your own as the two of you lost yourselves in one another.

When you could feel your lungs begging for oxygen, you attempted to draw away from Stephen, but he wouldn't allow you. His assault on your lips turned into desperate pecks as he gripped the back of your head, your lips parted in a gasp. You were so engrossed in him that you didn't notice he had lifted your shirt all the way up to your chest. He yanked the garment over your head and threw it on the ground. 

“Kiss me more.” He demanded when you were still collecting your breath when he gave you another passionate kiss on the lips. You moaned into his mouth as you opened yours for him, your breath trapped in your throat.

Stephen took you by surprise when he effortlessly lifted you up, his hands grasping your ass through your pants, your legs automatically encircling themselves around his waist. You delighted in the way his enormous hands appeared to fit your ass cheeks like they were made for them. 

He drove you atop one of the washing machines, your back arching beneath him as he consumed your lips while ridding you of your pants, your hands pressing on his hard biceps, his arousal grinding into the softness of your heat. You found yourself gasping at the sensation of his hard cock being between your legs while your hips rocked against his. You realised that you would do everything to have him inside of you.

“Say it to me baby.” He growled into your mouth while his face was just a few millimetres from yours and his mesmerising blue eyes held your gaze.

“What?” You asked innocently, breathing hard.

The corner of his lips curved into a smirk, “You want me inside you,” he paused, “I want to hear you say it.”

“And if I don’t want to?” You taunted him, trying not to get lost in his eyes.

Stephen gripped your face, leaning close until his lips grazed yours, and whispered, “Then I’ll make you beg for it.” You copied that little smirk of his; your tongue darts out and wets your lips, making him groan as he watches, “You like begging don’t you? You little slut.”

His hand wandered between your legs as he roughly opened you up. He pulled your laced garments to the side, his fingers slipping between your already wet folds, his fingers rubbing you in slow, sensuous strokes. He was avoiding your sensitive little nub on purpose while holding his gaze on you. 

Your body went rigid against his touch, trying not to give him satisfaction by suppressing your moans. He studied your face closely before leaving traces of kisses on your jaw, neck, and between your breasts. You twisted against him, he knew your body like a map and knew exactly where your sensitive points were. 

The rising and falling of your chest became uneven as Stephen bent down lower, pressing his lips on your pelvic bones, on your thighs—he was making you wait as he peppered kisses all over your skin. Your body was betraying you by flinching as you turned desperate to feel the relief of when his mouth consumes your throbbing clit and his fingers dug deep inside you. But instead, he took his time to admire what was his, “So fucking beautiful, and so wet.”

You were becoming frustrated and annoyed as he stood in front of you doing nothing, but just when you weren’t expecting it, Stephen dipped his head between your knees and licked the taut bud of your clit, relishing the sweet taste of you on his tongue.

“Yes.” You arched your back, your thighs strained, and you came up with a sequence of breathy moans that you didn't know you could make. Stephen parted you, and pressed his tongue flat against your core as he dragged it up, flicking his tongue over your clit with deadly precision as he increased the pressure of his tongue, “Fuck!” You grind your hips against his face, your fingers getting tangled in his hair.

Stephen moaned in response to your reaction, he clamped his lips over your sensitive nerves, he then began sucking and toying you until the noises that were coming out of your mouth were no longer within your control. Your eyes roll towards the back of your head, not knowing how long you can endure one more second of this torture.

“Look at you writhing and whimpering like a little whore,” he growled, pulling back enough for you to notice that his mouth and chin were coated in your wetness. “Do you want to cum? Do you want my cock inside your tight little cunt?”

“Uh-huh.” was the only sound you could muster up to say.

Stephen scoffed, “You want me to fuck you and make you cum? Come on moan it, Bitch.”

"Doctor Strange, please make me cum all over your face and then fuck me senseless right here, you were made to be inside me, please." You whimpered under his stare, your voice raspy and ragged.

A satisfied smile appeared on Stephens' lips, “That’s my good girl.” He dragged your legs to the edge of the machine and buried his face between your legs, licking and lapping, feasting on you with his tongue while his fingers sank into your hot flesh. You twisted and contorted yourself against him while he worked, forcing your hips into him so that you could feel his fingers more deeply.

“Doctor Strange, please.” You cried out breathlessly. Stephen unleashed himself at your plea, he gripped your thighs hard enough for your skin to bruise and you loved it. You could feel your muscles tense up as the knot in the pit of your stomach became unbearable, and when the release finally came, you screamed from the rush of it being so intense. 

Stephen sealed your cunt with his mouth, not wanting to waste any of your sweet, sweet nectar. You meet his lust-filled eyes as you watch him suck his fingers into his mouth, licking them clean one by one. 

“You look like you’re enjoying yourself, Doctor.” You sat up from your position, “Let me have a taste.” You slipped off of the machine and placed your hand on his chest as you tiptoed to catch his lips.

“I am, you just taste so good.” Stephen chuckled, his voice low and gentle this time. He cupped one side of your cheek and sealed your lips with a short and sweet kiss, letting you have a taste of yourself, Stephen leaned his forehead against yours and whispered, “I need you.” 

“Me too.” You told him with your eyes closed, pretending at that moment that he meant it as something else. Stephen unfastened his pants, leaving it pooling around his ankles. You pushed him down to sit on the bench with him looking up at you expectantly. You poised over him, straddling his lap, the hard length of his cock settled against your stomach. Stephen’s arms lifted you up as you wrapped your fingers around his shaft, pointing its head towards your entrance. You slowly drop down on his length, softly whimpering as his size tears your insides apart.

Stephen couldn’t help but allow a guttural groan to escape from him, you felt too good around him, too tight and too wet, he wasn’t sure if he was going to last long, it’s been at least a week since. You gripped either side of his shoulders as you rolled your hips, the pleasure of him building inside you again. 

Stephen couldn’t take his eyes off of you even though he wanted to throw his head back in pleasure, he thrusts his hips towards you as you bounce on him, the sound of the washing machine drowning out the noise your skin was making, “Fuck.” He groans.

Whimpering at the pleasure he was giving you, you reached for your oversensitive clit while Stephen was thrusting up so hard you almost fell backwards. Luckily, he was quick enough to catch you by wrapping his strong arms around your waist. 

Stephen grunts, gripping your hips this time, trying to slow down your pace to prevent the release that was building inside him. He wanted this to last for a while, to see you burst around his cock when he wanted you too, but you wouldn’t let him. You just kept rolling and grinding your hips desperately, leaving him no choice but to jerk against your wild and feral way of riding him.

Stephen’s phone began ringing, both of you jumped and paused to see who it could be. He reached down in his pants and pulled his phone out of his pockets, he sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose, “It’s Christine.”

You furrowed your brows and scratched your head, "Well, don’t answer it.” That came out a bit more defensive than you’d like it to be. Stephen exchanged glances between you and his phone, and he chose to answer his phone. 

You shook your head and scowled at him. You stared at his face, which you now found very irritating and slowly grinded on his cock, you pressed your head into the crook of his shoulder, opening your legs wider, coaxing him deeper. Little breathy moans escape your lips while you try to be quiet. Stephen clenched his jaw and glared at you while he chatted with the 'oh-so-great-Christine'. 

"Sorry, I can’t right now, I’m in the middle of… something—” Stephen’s voice wavered as bolts of electricity ran through his spine when you clenched your walls tightly around him. You roll your hips enticingly around his still hardened cock, one hand cupping your breasts in your palms and tweaking your nipple; one hand rubbing your own clit relentlessly, which forces a loud moan to slip past your lips.

“What was that?” You heard Christine ask on the phone, but you kept going, which got Stephen making faces at you. 

“Nothing—Look, I have to get going, I’m cooking something and it might overflow.” He gave the other woman a lame excuse, which brought an amused laugh out of you, “Alright. Bye.” Stephen threw his phone on the table and gave you a stern look, which you found very attractive, “You’re so dead.” 

“That’s more like it—Ah!” You squealed as he laid you down on the cold steel table, spreading your legs wide, not wasting any time, he began to thrust in earnest, deep, curved thrusts that made your hands reach back to dig into his thighs. Stephen’s lips parted with a grunt of your name as his erection slid home, he swore he could feel every single millimetre of your cunt as it swallowed his dick.

“More,” You moaned through your ragged breath, and he gave it to you.

Stephen was completely engrossed in the feelings both of you were experiencing, all he could hear was your squeals and moans, watching his cock slip in and out of your wet hole. You were saying words that spilled out in gasps and grunts and pants, right there and harder, I’m so close, come inside me. In a violent and furious embrace, he took your mouth, kissing you vigorously and worshipfully. It was very difficult for both of you to breathe at times, but you refused to stop, and he continued to fuck you all the while, feeling you tighten and writhe and finally break in a cry under his grasp. 

“Fuck, baby, I'm coming." He groans loudly and holds you tight to his cock while he pumps his essence deep inside your sweet body. Afterwards, he lets out a sigh and falls backwards with a satisfied smile on his face as his abs clench as he pants. You are unable to stop yourself from trembling and shaking as your cunt continues to pulsate and your heart pounds in your ribcage. 

You lay still for a few moments while trying to catch your breath, and just in time, your laundry finishes as well. You hastily got up and got dressed, and Stephen did the same. While you collected your clean uniform, he cleaned up after the mess you both left. 

Just as you were about to pick up your little basket, Stephen approached you, "Here, let me carry that for you.” He didn’t give you a chance to say no and just carried it. You left the laundry room together, a good one metre distance between the two of you, “Do you want to have a few drinks at my place?” Stephen broke the silence as you approached the car park. 

He knew you only took the train home, but it’s so late now, not to mention unsafe for a beautiful woman like you. You hummed and thought about it, “Sure, but no more funny business.” 

•••

Stephen’s lips parted from yours while he pulled himself out of you for the second time, leaving you filled but empty at the same time. It was a bruising kiss that left you wanting more than whatever you had with him now, it leaves you feeling the effects of something you did not understand. A flood of emotion swept through you, stinging your eyes. You just realised that both of you crossed a boundary into something that felt way too close to lovemaking. You were too caught up in the moment, in the way Stephen made you feel when he touched you, to stop it.

You froze at the thought, staring at the ceiling of his apartment. Stephen turned his body facing you, one of his hands cupped your jaw, “(Y/N)?”

You never imagined how much you would love to have him speak your name, to have him touch you like that. It frightened you. You can’t do this anymore, he already loves someone else, you weren’t anyone special to him, you would be nothing if you allowed this to progress.

“Stop,” you said softly and pushed away from him.

All at once, he did as you asked and he let you go. You climbed out of bed, needing to put distance between you and him. You picked up your clothes that were left scattered on the floor and began getting dressed.

“Did I do something wrong?” Stephen asked, eyeing you carefully from where he lay on his bed.

You ignored his question and said, "I really should go." You turned your back on him the whole time. You were unable to look at him for fear that he would see the tears welling up in your eyes; these tears were connected to feelings that you were unable to describe.

There was a long pause, and then you heard the bed shuffle as he sat up quickly, “At least tell me what the problem is,” he tried to reason with you, “Did I say or do something wrong?”

You regretted looking at him then, but the desperation in his voice caught you off guard, “No, Stephen.” 

Stephen scrunched his eyebrows when he saw that your eyes were glistening with fresh tears, “Clearly it’s not nothing when you’re crying.” Then he started to crawl out of bed while simultaneously reaching for his boxers and putting them on.

You looked away and rushed to go get your bag from where you left it in the living room. Stephen follows you shortly after. He grasped your wrist tightly, preventing you from leaving, “(Y/N), please. I won’t be able to sleep or work without knowing.”

Your eyes flutter as you take a deep inhale, finding the courage to just tell him and be done with it, “I can’t do this with you anymore, Stephen. I really can’t. The more that I spend time with you, the more I actually want to be with you. I could finally understand what they meant by ‘too much pleasure is pain'. Every time I tell myself that you don’t mean a thing to me, the complete opposite happens. I need to get away from you before I spiral down into a hole I can’t climb back out of. I’m not expecting you to feel the same way I do because I know your heart is already taken. Do me a favour and just focus on her. I’m done being your toy.” 

Stephen took in every single word you said, but he was too stunned to speak, “I- I didn’t know you felt that way. (Y/N) I’m so sorry, if only I knew—”

“I don't want to hear it, Stephen. You don’t need to explain yourself to me, we were nothing to begin with. Goodbye, Stephen. ” It hurt to say that, but you still yanked your wrist out of his possessive grasp and headed towards the door.

“(Y/N) wait, let me explain–” Stephen chased after you but had to come back and run inside to get a robe to cover himself up.

You rushed out of his apartment, whistling loudly for a taxi and waving your hand. A taxi parked in front of you just as Stephen was running from the elevators as fast as he could, “Drive, drive, drive!” You frantically told the driver without looking back at your lover.

“Fuck!” Stephen wiped his face with his hand and kicked the air out of frustration as he watched your taxi drive off into the distance. He dialled your number several times, but each time it went straight to your voicemail.

Beep. Hi this is (Y/N), Please repeat the secret code and if you get it right, I will call you back! Beep.

“Hey (Y/N), It’s Stephen. Can you call me back please? I- We need to talk. You’re being unfair by leaving me hanging like this. You might be done talking to me, but I’m not. This might sound like I’m threatening you, but–” Stephen got cut off by the beep and the line hung up, “but I not going to let you walk away that easily.”