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nnightskiess · 5 months

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everytime you leave, part five

₊° - 𝐲𝐞𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐟𝐞𝐫 𝐨𝐟 𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐛𝐞𝐫𝐠 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: 𝘵𝘪𝘴𝘴𝘢𝘪𝘢 𝘮𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘢𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘺𝘦𝘯𝘯𝘦𝘧𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘰𝘵𝘵𝘭𝘦 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘰𝘴, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘴𝘩𝘦 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘰𝘭𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘨𝘪𝘳𝘭 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘰𝘵𝘵𝘭𝘦 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴.

everytime you leave, masterlist

☾ ⋆*·ﾟ:⋆*·ﾟ:⠀ *⋆.*:·ﾟ .: ⋆*·ﾟ: .⋆

𝗽𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗱𝗼 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗰𝗼𝗽𝘆, 𝗿𝗲𝗽𝘂𝗯𝗹𝗶𝘀𝗵, 𝘁𝗿𝗮𝗻𝘀𝗹𝗮𝘁𝗲, 𝗿𝗲𝗽𝗿𝗼𝗱𝘂𝗰𝗲 𝗼𝗿 𝘂𝘀𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗶𝗺𝗮𝗴𝗶𝗻𝗲 𝗼𝗻 𝘄𝗮𝘁𝘁𝗽𝗮𝗱 𝗼𝗿 𝗼𝗻 𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝗽𝗹𝗮𝘁𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗺𝘀. 𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗽𝗲𝗰𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗮𝘂𝘁𝗵𝗼𝗿’𝘀 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸 <3

With the sound and sensation… of her heart beating loudly in her ears, Yennefer found it hard to fall asleep. Unease, restlessness, but yet also the feeling of being in control, of being right where she should be, accompanied her daydreams as she tossed and turned beneath the covers. The windows rattled as another harsh gust of wind slapped against the walls of Aretuza, but while it had been a sound that had kept her wide awake during her first few weeks, it served as a comforting lullaby now. At least in this room, void of judgemental stares, void of feelings of envy and hatred, she could come closer to who she was before coming here. Alone and imprisoned with only her thoughts to keep her company. The wind continued to howl as the dancing flames in the fireplace barely managed to keep her from freezing. It was a particularly stormy night on the Isle of Thanedd. So high up this hill, at the foot of the ocean, Aretuza was often the first victim of the land’s ruthless weather. But it was nothing like she’d seen before. It was as if the rain pelting against the glass and the wind crying out were both begging to be let in, to comfort the newest addition to the Brotherhood. Yennefer could only imagine how you must be feeling right now. Cold and frightened of the unknown. She knew, because she had felt the exact same. And alone, most of all. Sure, she favoured some people over others, but Yennefer could never truthfully admit she had friends. That would be a lie. No one had ever been her friend, and being in Aretuza hadn't changed that. If anything, she'd shut down each and every attempt at a friendship, suspecting they made fun of her behind her back anyway. And she’d prefer to not have any friends. She’d stay to learn what she needed, to take care of herself as a mage in this world. Then she’d go and use that power and knowledge to live her own life. She was the worst of her class anyway, so what use would the Brotherhood have with her?

Her mind wandered back to you as the wind howled again. Somehow, as she’d looked into those eyes that had spat fire at her, she’d seen recognition. Familiarity, something kindred. It had given her a sensation she’d never felt before. Hope. Because there was hope in the power she felt rumbling through her veins the minute you locked eyes. She’d seen you as easy prey for the other mages the minute she’d watched Tissaia bring in your defeated form, seen you tattered and burned and bruised, and heard you banging against the door. She felt a little bad at the relief that washed over her, thinking that perhaps you'd be the next freak show with all those burns, that maybe you'd be even worse than her in classes and she wouldn't have to face Tissaia's wrath anymore. Then the littlest voice, hidden behind thick walls inside her, had wondered if maybe, she shouldn't pit against you. Maybe, she could finally have a friend, one as ruined as she was. Someone who understood her, who could see past the ugliness. But no, you were just like everyone else.

Yennefer closed her eyes, her eyebrows furrowed as she bit her lip until it bled. Her body was restless— it itched, it burned, it pinched and it was feverishly hot and piercing cold all at the same time. Yet her mind was even worse. The number of different things she smelt made her dizzy and nauseous— from the smell of blood, fire, and scorched earth, to that of summer rain, something flowery and, funnily enough, that of an apple tart. It was so specific, that it kept plaguing her, keeping her up. As if it was part of a memory she should have remembered and that it wouldn’t leave her senses until she did. Then there were the flashes of memories she saw when she closed her eyes— from the sun peaking through the thick canopy of treetops, a cellar stocked with food right before a harsh winter, muddy hands ploughing through the earth, the feeling of the cold water of a lake dancing against her thighs, to horses crying out and galloping in hopes to diminish the flames burning them alive. She heard screams, the soft trickle of a river, a song being hummed, and the bubbling of a large fire. Surely she must still be hallucinating, a direct result of the herbology class that had gone wrong today, where Tissaia had given them something to chew under false pretences just so they could learn to always keep their wits about them and stay alert. Because these rushes of smells and sensations weren’t hers, not all of them, at least. Perhaps this was another one of Tissaia's tests. They’d probably all wake up tomorrow, exhausted from the lack of sleep, and have the hardest test ever to train how well they’d do in the difficult circumstances of little sleep and even less concentration. Because Yennefer had none left of the latter. And when Yennefer couldn’t concentrate or control herself, she’d grow irritated, but more importantly, she’d become a danger, waiting to explode. Because that was Yennefer— she’d never implode. When she was annoyed, everyone would know. When she was mad, everyone would have to deal with it. Perhaps she was born like that, or she’d made it part of her defence after coming here. She, herself, was her most-priced possession now. But on the other side of the hall, hidden behind thick bricks and in the dark of the night, you were waiting for not the explosion, but the implosion. And when it came to you, an explosion would inevitably follow after that. You would only explode after imploding, after being hurt, defied and beaten. And after the events that had happened, you were waiting for another big bang to occur.

With your body shivering from the cold, you jumped as the windows clattered once more, the pelting rain finding amusement in it. They were making fun of you, you were sure, pointing fingers and not even trying to hide their grins and chuckles behind their hands. You were defeated. You were heartbroken. Exhausted to no end. But while everything in you screamed for sleep, a louder voice screamed with images, smells and sounds that had painted the nightmare of the last few days. It terrified you. Not even a few days here and somehow the mage in you had been unleashed more often than since your birth. Perhaps that was just an aftershock of this conduit moment Tissaia had been talking about. Or was this place some sort of amplifier? Or was everyone plagued by their terrors and were they just better at shutting them out?

You released a shaky breath when you swallowed back a sob. In the cold of this room, during this storm, all you longed for was your mother’s warm embrace, the way she’d comfort you with a hummed song, or how she’d bake her favourite tarts during the first day of winter. But you didn’t deserve warmth, nor did you long for it. Not anymore. Not after you’d seen what followed heat. The destruction it had left. You didn’t deserve to long for your mother or your family when you had been the one who’d brought them to their doom. And even while you tried to get those images to comfort you, an unfamiliar sensation washed over you. It had hit you as hard as the wind making the windows clatter. Unfamiliar sights and smells ensnared your mind. You could smell the waste of fruit and vegetables combined with the rotting of wet hay. You saw a pigpen, a well and a table full of kids. There were only three chairs, but no one seemed to mind eating their platter on the ground. A happy family, you presumed. But then your body shook with a sensation you’d only recently truly learned and embraced— anger. It grew warm, made beads of sweat tickle your forehead and made you let out a whine in pure fright. Not again. Not here. The only comfort you found was the humbling realisation that your hands and fingers were still freezing. So long as they were, nothing would happen. You saw a couple of kids again, heard them laughing, and watched as you were then pushed to the ground, your body jolting in your bed in real-time.

The wind cried out again, and you were back in your room. You had wanted to stay awake, not wanting to be caught off guard in this place, not feeling safe enough to rest, nor liking the way the door wasn't locked, meaning everyone had acces. But after all these visions had kept you restless, you’d prayed to fall asleep and just be rid of them. Only, how could you sleep in a room as cold and damp as this one and in total darkness? How could you be sure there was no one lurking? And why had that thought even crossed your mind? The sudden thought of it made you shoot up in your bed. Though you’d never truly realised the root of all these weird things happening in your life had been chaos, you had always been a girl very trusting of your gut, your inner instinct. That was exactly why your heartbeat stammered and bounced between your two ears.

You pushed your legs over the edge of the bed and let your eyes search the darkness to see if there was any proof of your suspicion. You racked your brain to try and remember if there'd been anything useful in this room to defend yourself with, but you figured that they'd taken that away, seeing as you could harm yourself with it, too. The windows clattering in their hinges caught you off guard as your head snapped to them, where they still mocked your fright. The air changed and grew a little stuffy, as if a palpable sense of power had engulfed you, trying to dominate you. It elevated your senses and your chest rose up and down in shallow breaths. Your body started to prickle like it would whenever you’d fallen asleep on a limb resting in an uncomfortable position. You squeezed your eyes shut, frozen in fear, longing for your mother like a young child. You pushed a quiet sob out at the realisation that you didn't even remember the last time you'd hugged her. Your heartbeat sped up, but it wasn’t the warmth of tears that you felt on your face.

It was a hand, cupping against your lips, pushing harshly to muffle any sound that would escape.

“Not a sound.” Hushed a voice, which you could only hear because it had spoken so close to your ear. Stricken with fright, you fought your head out of their hold, eyes snapping open and immediately looking into the lilac eyes of the girl who had given you such a warm welcome earlier. With the same big eyes she had pierced your gaze mere hours before, you took in her face again. You reached forward, both your hands pushing at her chest to create some distance.

Yennefer stumbled backwards.

“You come into my room, unannounced, and jump at me from the dark?” You voiced, eyes wide and breathing fast.

Yennefer didn’t feel like wasting her breath on starting a discussion with you, not this time, not when she was already this exhausted.

“You’re too loud, quiet your damn mind or I fucking will.” Yennefer huffed, standing back up to her full height, as much as she could. She watched you, eyes full of fire, but her bottom lip pouting out made her look less intimidating than she wanted to be.

Baffled, you reached forward again, an accusatory finger pointed Yennefer’s way, “Get out of my room!”

"You know that they let a girl die in that bed four days ago?" She stated matter of factly, ignoring how your eyes widened, then glanced around your room. It was as if Yennefer found joy in tantalising you, “Why’s your fire out? Do you want to see how long it will take you to freeze to death? Desperate to set the record of how quick someone can die after arriving?”

Yennefer shrugged, continuing her one-way conversation, "Good luck with that then, they won't let you if they don't want you."

“I said get out.” You sneered in a whisper, still aware that Yennefer was in your room, during this time of night. You didn't know if this visit was breaking any rules, though you supposed it did. And Tissaia had warned you to keep to yourself for now.

“Why? It’s finally quiet, isn’t it?” Yennefer challenged, staring at your idle form on the bed.

She was right, you quickly realised. The thoughts were gone, the sensations now a mere memory.

You wondered, “Did you do that?”

“I can’t control your mind, we haven’t learned that yet. You did that yourself.” Yennefer grunted out the last part with a bitter taste in her mouth, realising that with your arrival, she might have to prove herself even harder. You weren't as useless as she deemed you to be when you'd looked halfdead already when Tissaia had carried you in. But she wouldn't let you have the satisfaction, “Be grateful, me coming here finally distracted you from those damned apple tarts of yours.”

Shocked, confused and intrigued all the same, you sat back up, “How did you know that?” You could faintly smell them already even at the mere thought of them.

"Know what?"

"About the apple tarts?"

Yennefer's shoulders tensed in irritation, “It’s something mages can do, transfer thoughts and visions... memories and such. Someone I know showed me that before. But that was by touch... and now I was on the other side of the hallway.” Yennefer let her words carry out in wonder, her voice dying down as the words she spoke found a place in her mind.

“But how did you know they were mine?”

“Didn't you come here covered in burns? All I saw was fire at first. It made sense.” Yennefer watched intently and saw how her words had struck you harder than she’d meant. But she couldn't let herself feel bad about it, not when you already had one on her without having even attended a single class, “Besides, all of us longed for home the first few weeks we came here. Don’t worry, they’ll chant that out of you, too, together with all you loved and knew of your life before. A puppet for the Brotherhood," Yennefer huffed, her thoughts wandering off, "That was your mother? Humming?”

You locked your jaw and threw off the linen sheets still half draped around your legs, being overcome with heat, hatred, and frustration. All the results of losing control of the situation.

You knew you should tell her to go and take control of the situation before things would go very wrong again. You could push her out if she didn't listen. But the way she'd asked if it had been your mother... well, it had irked something inside of you. So, instead, with a defying grin, you shot back, “You had quite a lot of siblings, a nice family, two loving parents, yes?” You decided to play by her rules and watched the tension in Yennefer’s uneven posture grow.

“Have.” Was all the lilac-eyed girl declared through gritted teeth.

“But didn't you just say that once you’re brought here, you begin a new life, fully devoted to the Brotherhood?" Yennefer's earlier explanation made it clear that some of the things you'd seen, had belonged to her mind. So, you added, "Or are you truly so keen on going back to the family that had you sleep among the pigs?” You knew it was low, that it went too far, but you could not help yourself. You were hurt, and she had known and made it hurt even worse anyway.

Yennefer took a step forward, hands balled in tight, white-knuckled fists, breaths puffing out of her nose. She hid her surprise and hurt and masked it with anger, as she always did. You were a worthy opponent in this clash, but she knew she had the upper hand after having seen flashes of your life.

“At least I have a family to return to.”

Within an instant, startling even Yennefer who masterfully hid it behind an intrigued glance, you jumped up. Face to face, you could feel Yennefer’s warm breath tickle your skin in intervals, your own fanning that of Yennefer as well. She watched intently, waiting for what would happen next. Letting you make the next move so she would know exactly how to one-up you.

But what had started as eyes reflecting hatred, turned to eyes full of tears soon after. She quickly realised she’d gone too far. She’d brought someone down to the lowest place in existence, a place that wasn't foreign to her, and she hated how the sudden feeling of euphoria and power tapping against her chest had disappeared. The scars on her wrist started to pulse as if they were berating her.

The fire in your eyes and belly had just been lit as if a Witcher had stood behind you and cast Igni over your shoulder. You watched as Yennefer’s eyes softened slightly and a sense of understanding replaced the harshness. You could not watch the change happen for too long, because her face disappeared from your view entirely a second after.

Yennefer’s only instinct was to duck when the shrill sound of glass shattering with high force rang through the room. Shards and glass particles danced around you before falling to the floor in a cacophony of deadly crystal rain. Where other pieces fell idle on the floor, some had thrown themselves into the hardwood floors, sticking out like shiny traps.

You had ducked down not long after, trying to peek through the arms that had shielded your face from the shards. The floorboards buzzed in the aftermath.

“Get a hold of yourself!” Yennefer yelled above the rain and wind that had finally been welcomed inside, as the piercing cold slapped against your faces. Your panic only intensified when you realised you had been the one behind this blast as you looked down at where you stood, the shards having stopped in a circle around the two of you. There had been no fire for your chaos to latch onto, so it had taken the next best rumbling thing to attract— the storm outside.

Yennefer’s words had caused the implosion inside of you before the explosion currently unwrapping around you had introduced itself. What terrorised your thoughts even more, was the realisation that a slight vortex of wind had started to take shape around the room, slowly collecting whatever stood in it.

The storm had answered your beckoning, but now you kept quiet, so it decided to do its own thing.

“Cut it off!” Yennefer shrieked, her hands flailing around her in the dark before finally coming across one of your wrists. She found the other not long after and used them to harshly yank the two of you fully onto the ground. She squeezed the blood out of your hands, no doubt leaving bruises in the flesh. Then she yanked again, a silent but urgent plea to stop whatever you were doing, and to stop it now.

Instantly, the room went oddly quiet, aside from the occasional object slowly losing its movement and coming to a spinning or falling end. It was as if the world had stopped momentarily, as the howling and clashing of the storm now seemed further away than it ever had before. Another yank on your wrists made you look up into Yennefer’s violet eyes. Your ears popped, and you could breathe again. Sound returned and so did the realisation of the severity of what had just happened. The room was in complete disarray, and, to be fair, so were the two of you.

“What did you do?” Your lips quivered as your eyes took in the destruction and the broken windows, making it easy for the wind to blow your hair into your faces. Still, you could clearly see the violet eyes of the girl in front of you going wide from the accusation.

“How is this my fault?! What the fuck did you do?” Yennefer ricocheted, panic increasing, “You razed this place!”

You inched closer, upping the tension between you, and spoke through gritted teeth, “Because you couldn’t leave me alone!”

The heavy wooden door creaked open, and in walked Tissaia and two other mages, all clearly just woken from their sleep. The two of you turned to the door and you were pretty sure that the women could hear your heartbeat even from their distance.

Tissaia took a step further into the room, examining the damage, cupped her hands in front of her and then inspected the two of you. You pushed yourself back up immediately, but not before sending a nasty glare Yennefer's way. You didn't want to know the amount of trouble she had just gotten you in.

“Can the two of you explain what in the world has happened here and why you are out of bed?” Her stern gaze that spat fire was directed equally between the both of you, and you felt some sense of relief that maybe you wouldn't get all the blame. “Now.” Aretuza’s rectoress spoke slowly, intensifying her stare to make the severity known, if the state of the room hadn’t already done so.

Yennefer stumbled up, locking her jaw and grinding her teeth together. Neither of you said a word.

“Very well. My office.” Tissaia turned around, exchanged a look with the two mages who no doubt were having to stay up to fix the room, and disappeared into the hallway, expecting the two of you to follow her.

“Now you’ve done it.” You huffed and left the room, leaving Yennefer to mutter something under her breath before eventually following, too.

Tissaia was already sitting behind her desk when you arrived and motioned to the vacant seats by dipping her head. Yennefer rolled her eyes and stayed back as she watched you sit down without a protest. Tissaia’s eyes now went to Yennefer,

“Sit or I will make you wish you’d sat on your own accord, piglet.”

Begrudgingly, Yennefer stumbled forward, hating how her uneven posture made her feel small and frail instead of powerful and confident as she sat down.

“Talk.” She directed her venom towards Yennefer first, but the girl shrugged,

“You should really replace the windows of this damned place more often, they’re not prone to this kind of storm, as it seems.”

“They’re protected by Aretuza’s chaos, they’re indestructable. Would you be so kind to tell me how two young mages were able to break a Brotherhood barrier or should we start by why you were not in your own room after curfew?” Still, her stare and harsh words were directed towards Yennefer, who was beginning to find the entire situation all too unfair.

“I don’t know who she is, but clearly it was a misjudgement to take her in. Her control over her chaos is utter shit.” Yennefer started, nudging her head to the left, not sparing you a glance, too frustrated with the situation you’d gotten her in by almost blowing up the place.

“What were you doing in her room?” Tissaia repeated herself, growing impatient at Yennefer’s choice of words.

Yennefer didn't say a word, not wanting to admit to Tissaia that you had already managed to link minds with someone on your first day. Perhaps this was just a fluke, a one time thing. She would not bury her own grave by giving you indirect praise.

"Y/N?"

Your face was set in stone, but Tissaia's glare made you crack, "She came into my room and wouldn't leave."

“And?"

Now Yennefer sat up, "And she tore the place apart, that's it."

"There will be no pointing fingers until I know what happened exactly.”

“I don’t know what happened,” You spoke truthfully, “I felt restless, kept seeing things that had never been seen by my own eyes each time I closed them.”

Yennefer sank into the chair— great.

Tissaia’s face changed at this information, but she kept silent.

“I had lost control again before I realised it was slipping out of my grasp and everything happened all at once. Yennefer found me like that. That is all. Then I wanted her to leave, but she wouldn't.”

Yennefer’s head whipped to the side, her big eyes narrowing and her brows starting to furrow. What were you doing?

Tissaia wrapped her hands together and rested her chin atop of them, staring in a way that made you feel as if she could see right through you. For all you knew, she could, but you desperately hoped that wasn’t a thing mages could do and that it was limited to smells or visions of apple tarts.

It was an awkward couple of seconds as Tissaia kept staring. At last, she sighed and sat back in her chair, tapping a soft rhythm on the armrests as her gaze shifted between the two of you.

“You will spend each afternoon after class in this office and you won’t leave until you’ve succeeded the task I’ve given you. Starting right now.” Tissaia lifted up her finger to signal silence before Yennefer could butt in. Then, she shoved a golden tray across the desk. On it— a vase with one single flower, a blushing pink carnation, and next to it, an empty glass, “You will both transfer the water from the vase into the glass. I want no droplet left in the currently filled vase when you’re done. And if the glass shatters or the flower dies, you will reverse those mistakes as well. Understood?”

Yennefer sank down in her seat. This was advanced stuff considering she had only started at Aretuza a few weeks ago, and her levitation work was abysmal as well, to say the least.

“But I’ve just come here, I don’t know any-” You swallowed down your words at the look Tissaia gave you, the concern of blowing up not only a simple vase but Tissaia’s entire office lost into the background.

“Use your chaos.” She spoke each word with fervor as she looked at you both, as if to convey an ulterior message. One unknown to you, for now. “Control it. Bend it to your will. Direct it, don’t be directed. Learn from each other. But keep it bottled. Always. This world is in balance because all of our chaos is bottled, it is guarded, it is dealt with delicately. And you will now learn to do so, as well.”

She looked at you, then at Yennefer, and she watched your focus shift to the tray in front of you, where the sound of water being poured into a glass appeared. Then, Tissaia stood up and, before she left the room, put out the fireplace. She gave you a sharp look, and you know she'd done it because of you. Her footsteps dissipated in a slow fading echo and the two of you sat in silence for a beat.

Yennefer turned in her seat, confused, and watched as you stared at the carnation.

“Why did you do that?”

“You shouldn't have been in my room, but I was the one who got you in trouble, ultimately.”

"Oh- fuck off," Yennefer rolled her eyes at your chivalry, sensing you were one of those morally good people. The kind of people that wouldn't survive this type of world, but she knew you'd learn soon enough. "Did you forget the part I badmouthed your dead family?"

Your hands clenched, but you willed yourself to keep in control, "I said some unnecessarily mean stuff myself, do you remember?"

"So what? You want to be my friend now?"

"If this is you as a friend, then yeah, because I don't want you as an enemy, coming into my room at night for hell knows what." You bit back but with a slight air of lightheartedness.

Yennefer chuckled dryly and shook her head, “As if I should believe you after what went on between us. Barely even a day here and you're already acting like all the others— sucking up to Tissaia and upholding the peaceful act that we should all be friends.”

You turned in your seat, “You're doing a terrible job of hiding your jealousy."

"You fucking wish."

"Well, what is it, then? Because even if I haven't been here for long, I already know you’re sticking out like a sore thumb among the others-” You saw the split second of hurt on Yennefer’s face as she thought her looks were alluded to, “-by sticking your nose where you shouldn’t.”

“Ah, you seem to know me so well after we’ve only- what? Met twice? Tell me then, why do you think I hate this place?”

“I think you hate it because you don't fit in, and that terrifies you, because you've never fit in anywhere."

Yennefer finally turned quiet. You knew you had hit the nail on its head even before the words had left your mouth. It was too obvious, the insecurity practically painted onto her forehead.

Yennefer stared at the flower that seemed to mock her mood with all its glory. She’d been here for weeks now, and each day, she’d wanted to go back home. Sure, it had been exhilarating to find out she had chaos inside of her, but what good was it if she couldn’t even lift a stupid little pebble? Her conduit moment had forced her into this life, and she hated the lack of choice, yet, she didn’t want to go back to her old life either, to being unwanted and treated worse than the cattle she'd had to sleep next to. But this place… it had brought out the worst in her. Frustration, unhealthy competitiveness, resentment, envy, insecurity, hatred. It had even turned into an attempt to end her life during the first night. Perhaps she had been a little too harsh on you after all. Instead of crying yourself to sleep, you were stuck here with the crazed hunchback you no doubt thought she was. How else could you? Yennefer could feel the way people stared at her, and while it had been awful in her old life, those stares had turned unbearable here. She felt like the ugly goose in a lake full of swans. She was the ugly goose. And if she hadn’t been so self-aware, she would have still known she was by the number of times she’d been called names back home in her village.

But you… you were one of the swans. Perhaps the brightest and most promising of the bunch even when she first saw you filled in muck and burns. Maybe exactly because of that. It showed a conduit moment far greater than freezing a cat or making your mother fat. And if she needed proof, it had been shown to her on a silver platter just now, as the chamber had fallen victim to hazardous destruction by your doing. It was unfair. Powerful and pretty shouldn’t be allowed to coerce together. One could not have the best of both platters, but Yennefer knew that in this environment, that was exactly what was wanted. Being powerful earned respect…fear... but being pretty meant that people would hang onto your every word, would agree with everything you said and would move mountains for you, no questions asked. And, it didn't hurt to get some good attention for a chance. One day, Yennefer knew she would get that chance. But being powerful… well, no ascension could change her chaos. Not really. And the only way she could ascend and become beautiful, was if she was skilled and powerful enough to earn it. No court would want an ugly mage, but a pretty mage lacking the powers a sorceress needed to possess was useless to them, too. She was stuck between a rock and a hard place, and it had been people like you who’d put her there. People who'd had it all from the beginning, and then whined because they thought they had it worse. Still, she couldn’t help but spark a tiny flicker of intrigue towards you. She was certain you held more magical capabilities with no knowledge of the entire chaos ladder than Sabrina held after months of practice and studies.

“How did you do that, back there, in the room?” She wondered after a while, brushing off how she'd left you hanging on your clever observation.

“You say it in such a tone that makes me think I should be proud of it.”

“Because you should.”

“No, I should not, if you hadn’t pulled me out of it, I would’ve likely taken the entire tower down with us.”

Yennefer licked her lips, “So, what I’m hearing there is an unspoken thank you for not making you a mass murderer.”

Your heart clenched at the awful irony in that, but then you saw the tiniest pull of Yennefer’s lips turn them into a small smile.

Quietly, and feeling defeated as you looked at the golden tray on Tissaia’s desk, you muttered, “It all wouldn’t have happened if you hadn’t said those things.”

Yennefer’s trying smile disappeared soon enough, her eyes inspecting the tray as well, “Perhaps.”

“If you try a little harder, it could almost start to sound like an apology.” You quipped back, not missing the fact the girl had at least shown the slightest hint of remorse. Still, her words had hurt, and your heart was still breaking each moment your mind went back to the family you no longer had.

Yennefer shrugged absentmindedly, still in deep thought.

“Well, it’s a very timid one then. You should work on that.”

“What we should really work on is Tissaia’s task. I’ve only just touched upon levitation work, water bending is something else entirely.”

“I’m afraid that tonight I’ll ruin not only my chamber, but this office as well.”

Yennefer watched you shift in your seat uncomfortably, staring at the never-ending rain tapping against the window. Then she huffed out a chuckle, liking the dry sense of humour that had slipped past your lips, even if you didn't seem to be aware of it. Maybe especially because of that reason.

“Tissaia said that a healthy balance is needed. Power must come from something, a sacrifice has to be made.” Her voice lulled you out of your worries.

You thought about it, “The water is practically already there, so that means-”

Yennefer nodded, “-we can use that very same water as a balancing factor while we transfer. It’s already there, there’s no conjuring it. Making sure our chaos is trapped within that water and stays there at all times and doesn’t bounce off, is key.”

“You know a lot.”

Yennefer made a face, “These are the basics that get repeated to us each and every hour. It’s simple.”

“The existence of chaos doesn’t sound so simple. Two days ago I didn’t even know what it meant. I still don’t.”

“Yet you throw it around without care.” Yennefer rolled her eyes, not liking how you sounded just like Fringilla who always acted like she had no clue, but then succeeded within the first attempt. “Maybe you should sit this one out before we go blind by the shards of glass flying into our eyes.”

“She said the both of us.”

“Right, I forgot you were her little lapdog.” Yennefer stood to pick up the vase and inspected it. She pulled the flower out and watched the water dance inside as she swirled it around.

“A carnation,” You noted, continuing as Yennefer turned to you, “You know each colour holds a different meaning? The pink ones have a motherly kind of-”

“I don’t care.” Yennefer huffed in frustration and dipped the flower back into the vase, not having the faintest idea how to get the task done, but she’d felt the rejection in the soft sigh sounding from behind her, “Unless that information will help us out.”

Dejected, you stood up and looked around the office— there were bookcases filled to the brim with books that, no doubt, held a lot of knowledge of chaos and powers; trinkets lined the wooden surfaces above a large chest that looked macabre yet intriguing, pots of plants you didn't want to touch were lined up atop the windowsills, cabinets filled with vails and jars of what you assumed were different kind of herbs, all kinds of different shaped, sized, textured and coloured stones were sprawled out in an organised mess on a table in the corner and finally, the most normal thing in the entire room— a globe of the Continent.

The large bell coming from the tower suddenly broke the silence, ringing thrice to signal the hour of the night.

“Maybe we can find something in these books?” Yennefer followed your actions and she started to let her eyes roam across the bindings to find anything that sounded familiar enough to help. You felt your attention get tugged to the far right, to a row just above your eyesight.

Giambattista's Forces of Elements.

You pulled out the book and read the index, eyes then quickly falling onto the last of the long row of chapters.

Fire Magic and its Dangers.

“What’s that you got there? Elemental Magic?” Yennefer hummed, pulling the book out of your hands and skimming through it, “How to change the weather… how to manipulate the earth… how to… water, water-” She mumbled to herself, “Fire magic?”

Your head leapt up in curiosity, “What does it say?”

Yennefer looked at you, but as soon as she saw the word forbidden in the same sentence, she, too, became intrigued,

“Within the bounds of the usage of chaos, fire magic is strictly forbidden because of its destructive nature and the corrupting effects it has on those who use it. It often leads to dangerous consequences that can cause permanent corruption of one’s chaos and mind and often leads to death. It is the only type of magic that can both destroy and consume and asks the user to tap into the negativity stored inside, making it tempting for one’s chaos to lose control-” She stopped to look at you, but you ushered her to go on,

“The usage of fire magic often comes with a heavy price, for with this kind of chaos, the sacrifice is far greater than the result.”

“Chaos comes at a cost.” You nodded, having learned that the hard way.

“Starting to learn already,” Yennefer mumbled absentmindedly before skimming further through the book, “Here- Standard Practices of Bending Water. To bend water to their will, one must first focus on the balance to keep their chaos strapped within bounds before continuing to ground one’s existing being to find the balance around them. A strong mind and solid and rested soul are the key to directing an elemental force that can both bend, mend, block and destroy. As water isn’t afraid to burn in fire, fade into the sky, drown into the dark shroud of the earth or shatter against sharp rocks in rainfall, it is the most versatile element there is. It can dissolve into different kind of shapes depending on the mage’s needs. Water is both our up and down and can be found both above us in the sky or below us in the earth and is therefore the easiest found elemental balance, but not the easiest used. Great-” Yennefer muttered before continuing, “Because of its many states and forms, it is hard to use chaos to bend water to your liking. Young mages might find chewing or burning dried mint or lemon skin beneficial to hone this skill, as those are known to have natural properties that can help remove impurities from water, removing any contrarian factors and thus making the transition to use one’s chaos to bend this element easier." Yennefer clapped the book closed, "Well, that was a load of bull.”

“It didn’t say anything about transferring water?”

“Nothing about incantation either.”

“There are incantations you can use?”

“Another thing learned,” Yennefer sighed out uninterestingly.

Your eyes examined all the books in front of you, “You know, kindness would suit you."

“Like that’s ever gotten anyone anywhere in this world.”

“Wow, someone must have really hurt you for you to be this bitter.” You huffed, done being kind, proving Yennefer’s point, and walked to Tissaia’s cabinet full of herbs. You read all the labels on the pots, which were thankfully placed in alphabetic order, “Here, mint leaves.”

Yennefer put one in her mouth, started to chew, and grabbed the vase with water in one hand, the empty glass in the other.

“The book said to ground yourself first.”

“I am grounded.” Yennefer snapped sharply.

“I can see that.” You shot back.

Yennefer felt the inside of her mouth tingle from the mint and tried to focus on the water. If she could just make a ripple, anything, to show she could move the water, she’d feel a lot better.

“Maybe try removing the flower. It might interfere since it’s a living thing and could use the water as power to stay alive?”

Actually, Yennefer thought, that wasn’t such a daft comment, but fuck did she hate how you had been the one to make it. She watched as you plucked the carnation out of the tiny vase, twirling it in your fingers.

“Or, maybe, you could use the flower, too? Since it holds chaos, right?”

Once again, Yennefer hated how sharp your observation was. Tissaia had said to use whatever was at hand to provide the balance they needed, and you had heeded her advice. She looked at the flower dangling in front of her, stared at you before whisking it out of your hands and setting her teeth into a few petals. They didn’t taste nearly as good as they smelt, but that was of no importance to her now.

"What are you doing?!" You couldn't help but ask, finding it incredulous. But Yennefer ignored you, liking how she knew what she was doing this time, and you had no clue. It let her ease up a bit again. She'd had hours of lessons, you hadn't.

“If this all doesn’t work, we could just pour the water from one glass to the other,” Yennefer sighed, surprised that you let out an honest laugh.

“I don’t think she is one to fall for such tricks. Suppose she wants to see us do it.”

“Right,” Yennefer muttered, licked her lips, rolled her neck and clenched her jaw shut again, severely focusing on the water. Seconds passed. A minute. Then two. Nothing happened. She was feeling the exhaustion from the lack of sleep now, and her mind was still a little fuzzy from the class experiment. Yennefer started to shake and you reached out to stop her trembling hands, “Maybe you should-”

“-maybe you should shut up and let me do it!”

A cold splash hit both your hands as the water from the vase got blasted out. She looked at the water soaking up the floorboards, then at you.

“At least it’s out of the vase…”

Yennefer glared at you, “I almost had it! I could feel it start to move!��

“Sure, it just went the wrong way. It really looked like you knew what you were doing." You were starting to grow sick of how she kept snapping at you, "Look, we can just try again. There’s a pitcher over there."

You refilled it for her, “Go.”

Yennefer stared at you, at the way your brows were furrowed at her in slight annoyance... but also in slight intrigue, as if you were desperately waiting to see what Yennefer could bring forth.

Yennefer bit off another petal and chewed, starting all over, but with more confidence this time. She looked to her left again, right into your eyes and felt she could take a deeper, more grounded breath this time as it travelled all the way to her lower abdomen. Her fingers tingled, her chest warmed up, then her neck, then her arms and ultimately, her hands. The water started to bubble, splutter and dance against the edges of the vase as if Yennefer was tumbling the vase around, but her hands were frozen in place. You leaned in, amazed, this being the first time you'd seen the good kind of chaos. Yennefer closed her eyes, her ears ringing and her heartbeat now loudly pulsing inside her head. Her chaos was speaking to her. It was making itself known, just not loud enough yet for her to answer.

Tissaia approached the room, surprised by the silence. In her line of work, that never really meant good news. She made sure to take each step with great care to not announce her approaching presence. Once at the door, she peeked through the gap and watched. The two girls looked to be in great concentration. Tissaia noticed the opened book, the pot of herbs and the half-chewed-up flower lying dormant on her desk. She could feel the girl’s exhaustion from their previous endeavour, and their chaos hadn’t been spared by trying to get this task completed either.

“Watch your breathing, the water stops when you stop,”

She could hear your muffled voice and watched as Yennefer only nodded and made work of the advice instead of snarking back a reply. The sound of tiny singular drops falling into the empty glass filled the room, but from Tissaia’s spot in the hallway, the only proof that something seemed to be happening, was the gasp that Yennefer released.

Smiling softly to herself, Tissaia took a deep breath and opened the door, catching the two of you by surprise. She made a point to look at the items you had gotten by going through her stuff, without permission, then eyed the glass.

“It’s been a long night, perhaps tomorrow, after some hours of sleep, you’ll be able to transfer more than just a few teardrops.” She took place in front of her desk and leaned against it, watching as you stared at her, still bewildered, “Go now, off to bed. I want to see the two of you here tomorrow.”

“My room-”

“Is back to its original state. I suggest you keep it that way.”

You sauntered off, but before Yennefer could exit too, Tissaia held her back by her arm. She intently stared at the mage’s violet eyes, looking for something behind them, then let go. Tissaia turned around and watched the two of you disappear, knowing something had been set in motion.

*⋆.*:·ﾟ .: ⋆*·ﾟ: .⋆

-𝗻𝗻𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁𝘀𝗸𝗶𝗲𝘀𝘀

#yennefer of vengerberg x reader #yennefer imagine #yennefer of vengerberg fic #yennefer x reader #yennefer of vengerberg imagine #the witcher imagine #the witcher fic #everytime you leave

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jessiexcorner · 1 year

Text

‘Destiny is she.’

Kerack.

Just a small town with not much going for it, though it was known for its alcohol and the pirates that used to raid the people there centuries ago. 'Not anymore.' Yennefer thought as she drank. After the red death, the once-powerful kingdom fell into shambles. At least they still had their beer going on for them.

"TOSS A COIN TO YOUR WITCHER!" Yennefer winced, hearing the familiar song buzzing in the back.

"Ugh. If I have to hear that blasted song one more time, I'm going to kill myself." Yennefer turned to see the drunk bard who wrote it.

"Jaskier?" He turned his head to look up to see the sorceress. He gasped.

"You! Oh No! I've had enough of you! Y-you harlot witch!" Yennefer rolled her eyes.

"What? Your girlfriend dumped or something? Also, I'm a sorceress, not a witch."

"No, you ruined my friendship with my only friend! Just cause you had problems in your relationship with him didn't mean you had to ruin mine!"

"We didn't have a relationship."

"It doesn't matter now! I don't need him; I have plenty of friends. And women who want me!" Yennefer turned to order another drink. She didn't want to deal with this right now. A few gulps later, a young girl with blonde hair walked straight toward them.

"Hey! I know you!"

"You do? Oh no. Did I sleep with you?" The girl ignored Jaskier and continued talking to Yennefer.

"You're Yennefer of Vengeberg, aren't you?" Yennefer sighed.

"Look, kid, I don't sell magic anymore. Find someone else."

"Actual, I have a proposition for you."

"Not interested."

"I think you will be-"

"Get lost, kid, before I put a curse on you."

"Weren't you the one looking for a way to conceive?" Yennefer froze. Yes, it's true; that is what she wanted a way to be able to have a child again. But it's not as if she announced it to the world.

"Who told you that?" The girl shrugged with a smug smile.

"Call her destiny." Yennefer scoffed.

"Destiny?" The young girl nodded.

"Everyone knows about her. There's a legend on her. They say that if you ever want to change all the bad that has been done to you; change the fate you've been given, then follow the river upstream to the cottage in the woods. There be a woman, full of grace and beauty, but be careful what is said to her for destiny is she."

"First of all," the drunk bard who had been listening in began, "that doesn't rhyme."

"It's not supposed-" the blonde tried to argue.

"Second of all, who's 'they'?"

"What? No- Look, that doesn't matter, I'm not even talking to you!"

"You know he has a point," Yennefer said.

"Huh?"

"Who is this 'they'?" She said with a cheeky smile. The blonde girl turned redder than the drunken bard and stomped in anger.

"You know what! I don't care! I did what She told me to do and delivered the message! I'm leaving!" She marched out of the bar.

"Say, did you catch her name? I think she fancies me." Jaskier mumbled. Yennefer took a deep breath and finished her drink. 'let's find out who this destiny person is.' She thought, heading out.

. . .

'Well, what do you know there is a house.' Yennefer thought. She noticed there was a protection spell around the house covering it like a thick fog. She walked towards the house, trying to create a pathway for herself. 'Damn,' This was harder than she thought it would be. 'Why would anyone need such a potent protection spell?' As she tried to move through, it became harder to breathe. Yennefer could feel a headache coming on, it felt as if something was pushing her to fall asleep. She falls and gets knocked out by the gas. Before she falls completely unconscious she notices the end of a flowy robe walking towards her.

Yennefer wakes up feeling as if she has the worst hangover of her life, she notices a blanket covering her and a bed. "What the fuck?" she mutters noticing her surroundings for the first time. A bedroom with a fireplace, cozy and warm but what stuck out the most was the fact she didn't remember how she got here. The door to the bedroom opens before Yennefer can investigate her surroundings more thoroughly.

"Ah, you're not dead. Good." a woman with (h/c) hair wearing a simple white flowy gown exclaims. Yennefer startled immediately turns defensive shooting a gust of magic toward the woman who waves it off as if it were nothing, almost as if, annoyed by Yennefer's reaction.

"Now, is this any way to repay hospitality Yennefer?" The woman says practically scolding Yennefer like a misbehaving child.

"You knocked me out!"

"No, you knocked yourself out." She sat next to the violet-eyed woman, raising her hand near her making Yennefer flinch from the unexpected movement.

"Relax, I'm only helping your body get rid of the poison from the mist." She sighs moving away after she is done, Yennefer does feel a bit better, less like she had a massive hangover. The woman stands and walks near the fireplace, lighting it with a flick of her fingers, sitting down on a couch with a tea set on a table. "Well? come sit," She points at the other chair meant for Yennefer. Yennefer gets up and slowly walks to the woman sitting on the chair. "Cream?" She offers the raven-haired woman.

"..No," Yennefer declines not wanting any other foreign substances in her body.

"Suit yourself." The woman shrugs, pouring some cream for herself, and lifts her cup taking a sip.

"Why did you want me here?"

"Oh, did my little birdy not tell you?"

"No, well, yes but- that's not- look do you really have a way for me to conceive or are you playing games with me? Because i should warn you i am not in the mood." Yennefer huffs.

"Of course!" The (h/c) haired woman claps her hands making the tea set disappear, with a small vial and a contract replacing it. "This little bottle of magic can bring back anything that was lost. It'll fix you right up, grow back your uterus, and let you keep your good looks," She winks with a smile at Yennefer, who looks at the paper carefully.

"And I’m guessing this contract I am supposed to sign ensures I do your bidding?" The stranger's grin widens.

"Clever girl. it is fair, after all, i am only asking very little in return for a high reward." Yennefer scoffed but then again she was desperate she wanted this, badly.

"And what would that small favor be?" She questions the woman. "Am i to find you someone and bring them to you?" she rolls her eyes sarcastically commenting.

"Well, yes, that is exactly what I want you to do."

"Right. Sounds simple enough."

"Hm, simple." she hums in agreement, "I just need you to bring me Geralt of Rivia."

...What? "No, no! Absolutely not! What could you possibly need him for?" Yennefer protests, making the other woman rolled her eyes.

"I'm not going to eat him, or kill your lover boy,"

"He's not-"

"Come on Yen! All you have to do is bring one witcher here, and I'll give you the ability to conceive again, don't you want that choice back?" The woman circles Yennefer, "They took everything from you, yen. They took your right, your decision. Not only am i offering you your freedom, but i am also giving you an option that doesn't require sacrificing your beauty or power." She twirls a lock of Yennefer's hair around her fingers. "and all you have to do is bring me one measly man." Yennefer hesitates. This can't be real, this had to be a trick, but what could she do? the dragon plan didn't work, Geralt was an arse and she had nothing and no one left. "Tell you what, since you have so many issues with me," The woman picks up the vial and hands it to Yennefer. "You can try the potion of mine, and once it works, and it will believe me you will know if it does. You will bring me Geralt." Yennefer's face reads of worry. "Come on you, poor girl, what do you have to lose? You already tried everything. What, you're worried about your man? What do you think I will do to the witcher? Think I will kill him? He's more likely to end me before I can touch him." Yennefer lets the words of this woman influence her, but she couldn't understand what she wanted with Geralt.

"..Fine, deal, if this works...I'll bring you your witcher."

"Lovely!" The woman smiles waving her hand making a feather appear and floats into Yennefer's hand. Yennefer pauses, feeling the softness of the feather.

"...Before I sign this, I want to know your name, your real name. I have a feeling it isn't 'destiny'" The woman chuckles once again walking behind Yennefer, placing her soft hands onto her shoulders.

"(Y/n), a pleasure to meet you, Yennefer."

#the witcher #henry cavil x y/n #henry cavil x reader #yenneferthewitcher #geralt of rivera #geralt x yennefer #geralt x you #geraltxreader #geralt of river x reader #henry cavill geralt #yennefer of vengerberg #yennefer x reader

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nnightskiess · 1 month

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everytime you leave, part seven

₊° - 𝐲𝐞𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐟𝐞𝐫 𝐨𝐟 𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐛𝐞𝐫𝐠 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

everytime you leave, masterlist

☾ ⋆*·ﾟ:⋆*·ﾟ:⠀ *⋆.*:·ﾟ .: ⋆*·ﾟ: .⋆

The central hall was as well-lit as ever, despite the rumbling storm clouding over Aretuza. A handful of mages were already sitting around the tables, chatting away and waiting until the table with superiors was completely filled so that supper could commence. Your time among the other mages had not been made particularly easy when you'd taken a stand with Yennefer that first time, but it seemed that there were a few mages who you had intrigued with it. Anika, who you had learned was the only person close enough to a friend that Yennefer had, often sent you gentle smiles now. Triss still went and brought you healing elixirs every now and then, clearly a request from Tissaia, and she would never leave without having had a small chat with you. You were still too closed off and shaken by your past to properly let anyone in, and your sorrowful looks and distant behaviour weren't tempting your classmates to approach you. Sabrina would often glance your way, but you didn't like how she seemed to feel superior to the others simply because she'd been in Aretuza the longest. Fringilla never really appeared too interested in you, too occupied in mastering her Chaos to even notice you, so you didn't bother. Celestia was a different case. The mage was older than you, and the combination of her light hair and golden complexion made it hard for her not to stand out. She often observed you, sometimes to the point that it made your uneasiness make place for irritation. You didn't know why she did it. Frankly, you didn't even want to know, if not for the impending fear that she was trying to see right through you. And Johannah and Abigail, well, they had never looked your way again, but it was better that way. They weren't the type of people you wanted to have around, not even if their friendship was crucial to your survival in Aretuza.

It was because of your lack of friends that you tried to show up in the central hall before the others did. There was something peaceful about picking a table in the empty hall and waiting if someone would join you, instead of having to choose where to sit down with dozens of sets of eyes on you. Many a time, it was Triss and Sabrina who would accompany you. Well, Triss first, feeling pity over you, no doubt. Then the redhead would wave over Sabrina, who accepted the invitation out of curiosity over you and would not leave it up for debate to rope in some of the others. But Yennefer never sat with you again. Besides the times you would see her during your lessons or after classes in Tissaia's office to finish your punishment, she'd avoided you like the plague. She was often quiet during your shared detention, but her silence was never unsettling. It seemed as though she had come to terms with the fact you were going to be around, and that collaboration was necessary if she wanted to become the powerful mage she dreamed of.

You picked a table beneath the tall stained-glass windows, knowing it often remained unoccupied. A cupbearer appeared, pouring you a glass to hold you over before supper would begin.

"Do you think this endless rain will ever cease?"

A soft hand was placed on your shoulder and you watched as Celestia sat beside you.

"I suppose not, it would make the place lose all of its riveting charm," You muttered sarcastically, bringing the cup to your lips.

The woman beside you let out a dry chuckle at your disinterest, "Aren't you a delight. Is that why you turned some people in your village into cows?"

Your head snapped to her and her eyes bore into yours, the hint of her smile now gone. Her stare pierced right through you. Then she shook her head, and she grinned, "Don't worry. It's not the worst conduit moment out there."

You swallowed, a little cautious by the sudden topic of conversation, "Last week the rumour was that I turned my mother's hair green."

Celestia accepted the cup that was put in front of her, taking a big sip all while observing your face. She hummed, "So, which one was it then?"

"Why do you want to know?"

"You can tell quite a lot by someone's conduit moment." She shrugged and leaned to face you better.

"What was yours?"

She grinned, wickedly, as if talking to you had been the most entertaining part of her day, "I'll trade you mine for yours."

"Whatever are the two of you gossiping about?" Sabrina sat down in front of you, eyeing you and your rigid posture with clear interest.

Celestia barely acknowledged the girl, eyes still boring into yours. Maybe you were imagining things, or maybe the sudden panic and stress were sending sharp pains to your temples, "Sabrina made her mother fat, did you know?"

Bemused, the blonde nodded, "Hm, I did. Why are we talking about this, though?"

"About what?" Fringilla approached, Darallis and Jutta in tow, following her like puppies in the hopes of Fringilla's grace and power rubbing off on them.

"Y/N's conduit moment."

"Why?"

Finally, Celestia turned to the others and you could breathe again, "Because I want to know what really happened! It must be pretty embarrassing if she hasn't taken to gloating about it."

Sabrina brightened, "What I really want to know is what happened in your room that night when they instructed us to stay inside after we got woken up by all the noise. Jutta told me she could hear yelling before it felt like the walls came tumbling down."

Jutta perked up, ready to defend herself after having seen the accusatory look you'd shot her way, "I was only worried."

Celestia's faux sweet tone made the girl blush in embarrassment, "Hush, we all know you were scared."

Suddenly, the table fell silent, and you knew why when her voice sounded from behind you,

"To my office, pup."

With wide eyes and a stomach rumbling in protest not to leave the hall before you'd eaten, you turned around, "What?! Why?"

"Did you or did you not cut off your garments?" Tissaia pointed at the uneven ragged edge of your dress.

Mouth agape, you stopped, "I-... it was too long."

"And so will your detention be, which I will now extend for the foreseeable future." She gestured for you to stand up.

"But supper-" You hadn't been able to eat after the disgusting plant Tissaia had given you to chew on last night to try and control your mind when it was reeling had made you throw up. Its taste and sensations had finally faded off an hour ago, and you were starving.

However, the look Tissaia gave you shut you up. There was something in her eyes you recognised now. Desperation? Urgency?

All eyes were on you when you got up and followed her out of the central hall, listening to the clicking of her heels against the cobblestone halls. When the two of you were out of earshot and had walked into the hall of her private wing, she deemed it safe enough to speak,

"I fear I will have to speed up some of your lessons, going by what I just interrupted. We will start right away." She turned, eyeing the hem of your dress, "And we will get it tailored for you."

Tissaia opened the door to her office, expecting you to find your usual seat as she went and poured herself a drink. She knew she'd need it with today's private lesson.

You sat down in the chair across her desk much like you'd done every other night for the past three weeks when you'd practised your Chaos with her. Your fear of fire was still very much there, the knowledge you now could control a tiny flame hardly doing anything to your fast-beating heart whenever you walked passed a fireplace. You'd also still been summoned to sit out your punishment for the night Yennefer had come into your room. Even after three weeks, you still could not fight off the confusion after Tissaia had made it known to you that she'd been aware the two of you had lied, or that Yennefer had just as much blame for it as you had. How had she known? You make matters worse, neither you or Yennefer had managed to fully transfer the water without breaking the vase or killing the flower, but, as you'd learned from each other, you were now closer than ever. You knew it.

It worried you that Tissaia's desk seemed to be empty this time. Usually, she always had something already prepared for you. The mystery of what was to come installed some sense of unease in you.

"We humans are made of so much more than skin and bone. We have a mind that thinks of its own, a heart that wants one thing and a soul that desires another. When you will find your way into the world, at court or wherever else the Brotherhood will find need for you, you will understand that a person is made of thoughts and feelings often inconsistent to one another. They might think one thing but say another. They might promise to do this, but end up committing to that. Us mages need to be able to poke through that resolve and shield to ensure the balance of the Continent will not be compromised. I am not talking about dallying men trapped in a marriage and keeping it secret that they're in love with another damsel, I'm talking about statesmen, Kings and Queens promising to keep the peace but going to war."

She rounded her desk and, for the first time ever, sat down in the chair next to you.

"Ensnaring one's mind, uncovering its hidden motives, its fears and its memories, hearing its thoughts and taking in its senses requires a great deal of focus and expertise. Next month, we will start dipping our toes in mind control. All of the girls will be new to it and will know just as little as you do now," Her exclusion of naming you with the other girls, didn't go unnoticed, "But I fear that while they have nothing to lose when a silly little secret or their true feelings get uncovered, your very life could be forfeited when your not-so-little one gets out."

She leaned forward, eyes hard as she tried to make the severity known.

"I do not say this to frighten you, but you cannot let people know what you did, what you survived, and what you can do. And if you do not want to find yourself in just such a predicament, you need to first handle blocking out the prying eyes and ears of your novice classmates before you'll have to ward off suspecting and nosy individuals at court. Do you understand?"

You nodded, letting the information sink.

"Use your words, pup."

"I understand."

Tissaia always knew how to make you feel little, but you couldn't care less right now, sensing what was at stake. Her words scared you.

She sat back, seemingly satisfied with your compliance and attention.

"Keeping someone out of your mind is not the same as taking a peak in someone else's. It requires a different kind of focus and works its energy on another wavelength. While the lesson will start with reading what's deeply hidden within the minds of your classmates, the only thing that you will focus on, is how to keep them out."

You pursed your lips, insecurities taking over, "That's... that's nothing elemental," You thought of the candle and the pitcher of water, the gust of wind, then swallowed.

"It is not. It is a new territory entirely, but one you ought to master sooner rather than later."

She watched you, hearing the many thoughts swirling within, almost growing irritated by the new words already forming before the others had left your brain.

"You've gotten in trouble by not blocking someone out before." She smiled softly when she saw the quick realisation on your face.

"When you knew I had covered for Yennefer?"

Tissaia dipped her head, "I discovered a lie that time, but when you're a mage, especially one at court and surrounded by people trying to bring your Kingdom down to benefit themself, you cannot let yourself waver, you cannot let anyone inside your head to manipulate it, put falsities and insecurities in there and to dig through your weaknesses and knowlege."

"I understand," You repeated before she could ask you to confirm. She needed you to know the severity and importance of this lesson and the ones going forward, but, going by the focused frown of your brows, she knew she had you in the right mind space.

"But first, I will tell you what one can expect to experience when diving into someone's mind. It is good to know what you'll want them to ward off of before you know how to." She continued when you kept your intrigued gaze on her, begging her to continue. You might still not like what had happened, how you'd ended up here, but you weren't daft and knew as well as anyone that this was of importance to your survival. You might still have a death wish, to reconnect with your family, but you had a feeling your death would likely not be fast and unsuspecting if the day ever came.

"Once you've fully mastered the craft, you will instantly find what you are looking for to save yourself the time to plough through one's entire mind, but for you, it will be an overwhelming feat. Smells will fill your nostrils, you'll hear sounds and voices, feel sensations through your body as if you were there to live the memory that's playing out before you. They can be short moments in time that you'll get to see as if you were there yourself, or flitting images of memories tucked further away. It will be an overwhelming feat and you won't know what to focus on. If you do not learn to quiet your mind or block someone out, they will see all that you have ever thought, felt, tasted, heard, smelt and sensed."

You swallowed, taking it in, and then your eyes fluttered to the wall behind Tissaia, where an embroidered banner flag of the Brotherhood hung. As you let her words settle, you realised the explanation sounded oddly familiar to what you'd experienced on your first night here. You'd seen stuff... heard things, that hadn't been entirely your own— they had been Yennefer's. And while you hadn't had an explanation for it then, you'd been given one now.

Tissaia watched an unreadable expression settle on your face.

"You best tell me before I find it out myself."

Though her voice was stern and demanding, her eyes were filled with a careful curiosity as you looked up, "Getting into someone's mind...I think I already did that. Once. That I know of."

She tilted her head to the side, intrigue flashing across her features, "Why do you think that?"

"That night the storm came into my room," You said, not knowing how else to explain it, "There was a moment where I- where we... Yennefer and I, were in each other's head. I think- ... I think it was what sparked my Chaos to implode."

"Both your Chaos." Tissaia reminded you, clearly not wanting you to forget that Yennefer's Chaos had been just as much to blame for the destruction that had occurred, "And if you don't learn to control it, you'll not only implode but explode as well. Which is why we need to start with blocking your mind off right now."

☾ ⋆*·ﾟ:⋆*·ﾟ:⠀ *⋆.*:·ﾟ .: ⋆*·ﾟ: .⋆

Tissaia had carefully observed both mages throughout the first two weeks, sensing their chaos and how their fizzing rumbling seemed to grow in sound and sensation whenever they were near each other. Whether that was calculated or on pure accident, a happening of fate, she wasn't sure yet. She also wasn't sure what it would mean for the future of the Brotherhood. Young mages this powerful, able to break a Brotherhood barrier, were extremely scarce. Hells, to find any mage at all was already a gift these days. She needed to handle this delicately, think twenty steps ahead and figure out what this could mean for the survival and respect of mages in the Continent. Tissaia had scribbled down all possibilities for the two of you, of the Kingdoms to send you to and how and where the Continent would benefit most from your presence, maybe keep one of you at Aretuza to join her board of teachers once you proved your worth years later, or perhaps you could be of use for something else entirely. But before she could be certain that she had found liquid gold in two of her newest students, she needed to be sure your excellence wasn't just a momentary fluke.

As usual, Yennefer strolled into the classroom late, wanting to hide her eagerness to control her Chaos by annoying her rectoress.

"You're late," Tissaia stated, watching as the deformed girl's eyes immediately sought out those of yours down the end of the line. "Be a good little piglet and go sit across from our weakling pup."

All the girls watched as Yennefer's face grew with frustration and hurt, but sat down nonetheless. You locked eyes momentarily before Tissaia demanded your attention again,

"Today will be the next step in controlling your Chaos, and in controlling that of others," She started, giving you a quick look, the message clear as day, "But we cannot control the senses of others before we can sit back and watch them from a distance. Every great puppeteer has first spent hours watching a human's movements before making his puppet an extension of himself." Tissaia walked along the row of girls, staring at them intently to sense the state of their Chaos before their task. She peeked in their minds— Annika thought of her sisters, Fringilla of how she was going to be the best out of them all, Sabrina of the praise Tissaia would give her when she succeeded, but as her eyes locked with those of Yennefer's, she stopped her step. Mixed with the frustration clearly meant for her, she could sense something else. A pull... a hint of intrigue... a fastly beating heart and a clear view of Y/E/C coloured eyes. She ignored the glare Yennefer was still sending her way and continued,

"Look at the girl in front of you," She ordered, "Look until a door becomes a window. Seek to understand your partner's greatest fears."

Tissaia didn't even need to lock eyes with you to see the worry flash across your face. Despite the hours spent blocking out Tissaia's prying mind into yours, and having finally succeeded the past week, you were still unsure if you could do it on the spot, with so much pressure in your body. All the practising had left you fatigued, and you weren't quite sure if you had enough energy left to control your Chaos. And to have Yennefer see the destruction of your village, to know you were capable of such terror... and to let her in on the secret you had with your rectoress would mean the end of your deal. But above all, perhaps the thing you feared most was for her to see what lay beneath that all. That even while she'd been distant and rather unkindly to you, she was the closest thing you had to a friend after the hours spent together. You weren't exactly sure how she would take such pitiful news.

"With our eyes?" Yennefer wondered, not taking hers off yours for even a second. She tried to stall long and hard before blinking each time, hoping an unbroken connection would help enlighten something in yours. If only she could find an answer to the questions swirling beneath her chest.

"No, piglet. With Chaos." Tissaia stopped to stand in front of the row of seated girls, watching her two most promising young mages with great intrigue. If she was right about her suspicions, well, let's just say that immense power could bring immense victory or immense doom, depending on which side the coin fell on.

"Thought transference should flow through you, like learning to dance or swim or kiss."

Feeling Tissaia's eyes on you, you willed yourself to keep eye contact with Yennefer. Surely your rectoress was aware of the consequences that could doom your whole secret bargain and her prestige and authority among the Continent if you failed. Despite the lessons, did that mean she had faith in your potential, or that she held no belief that Yennefer would even succeed at looking beneath the sheath of your mind at all? Tissaia de Vries confused you immensely. She had blamed and belittled you right after the first day she'd brought you into her office, but lately, it was as if something had shifted within her. You often caught her looking at you already with an unreadable expression, and you did not know if you were supposed to feel scared or honoured to have Aretuza's rectoress attention.

That same buzzing that had plagued your head recently, but which you had quickly grown used to as well, reverberated through your head once more as you tried to look at whatever lay behind Yennefer's violet eyes. A crackling sound popped your ears right open and your chest swelled with the same sensation you'd felt right before your Chaos had torn your room apart. It worried you for as long as the feeling lasted until a wark blanket seemed to be draped over you, engulfing you in serenity. You felt something tickle beneath your skin, like nimble fingers gently prying and pulling at the threads of your Chaos, wanting to reach out and wrap it in a hug. It was comforting. It was peaceful.

Yennefer's jaw tensed as she clenched her teeth, desperately wanting to get this right, to prove she was not just a waste of space, that she was just as capable and worthy as any other young mage. But her skin tingled too much to pay proper attention. It was as if a thousand tiny ants were crawling above and beneath the surface of her skin. She imagined her Chaos reaching out to yours, clawing at it to pull it closer. A ringing echoed in her ears, and then a blood-curdling scream sounded. She winced slightly in surprise but stayed focused. Determined to dig further, she furrowed her brows in concentration, fighting the urge to look at the rest of your face instead of only your eyes. But no matter how hard she tried, something pushed her away, taking her Chaos away in that progress. She felt warm suddenly, and a thin layer of sweat coated her upper lip when she tried to ward off the serenity wanting to calm her restless Chaos down.

"Stop pushing me out," Yennefer spoke softly under her breath, in a focused trance. She knew she'd seen heaps of your memories before, and it had been through a wall, so she was sure she was going to have to succeed now that she was looking right into your eyes, just like the small glimpse Istredd had helped her see. She could do it then, so she had to do it now.

"I'm not doing anything." You replied, your voice barely above a whisper as well. But you were, you were clearing your mind with all your might while blocking out her Chaos each time it jabbed at you. With your concentration at an all-time high, your Chaos reached out to hers, gently guiding it out of your mind while keeping the bond composed and undisturbed.

"Well then maybe you should." She muttered, a little aggravated, for if you did not aid her to let her in, then how was she to succeed?

You blinked, your tone sharp but your hurt evident, "Or maybe you should try harder."

It was all that was needed to get the girl to blink and break her intense stare. She was taken aback, but at the same time knew she could have expected such a retort from you after her comment. She straightened her posture as much as she could and closed her eyes for a few seconds before staring right back into yours again.

Tissaia stiffened her expression as she watched the encounter, eager to see what would happen next. But no other word was exchanged between the two of you, for the next forty minutes at least. It impressed her how both of you were managing to stay still and focused for so long.

Suddenly, you saw a flash of what you could only presume was the Yennefer's past— a tiny fire, a table surrounded by children, the smell of straw and... Yennefer being sold for nothing more but four marks, then being pushed into Tissaia's arms. You perhaps had not seen her biggest fear, but you had seen something that had elicited the same feeling.

Your heart clenched as you felt a wave of unfamiliar emotions hit you all of a sudden, and you realised it was what Yennefer had felt during the flitted memories you had seen. It wasn't an excuse for her harsh behaviour, but you could not help but feel sympathy at the newfound information.

"I'm sorry."

Yennefer licked her lips and tilted her head, confused, "Whatever for?"

You shook your head, not wanting to bring it up in a quiet room full of your classmates, or with rectoress De Vries's eyes burning in the side of your face, or perhaps just not at all.

Suddenly, you realised you didn't really know any of the girls sitting around you. You didn't know their deepest struggles, their biggest fears or their most openly wide gaping wounds. You didn't know much past their names or how far they were with their Chaos. But as you had caught a quick glance in what had only been an hour of Yennefer's life, you suddenly felt closer to any of them than ever. She was different, but all the same. You shared struggles, you shared pain and you shared a longing for a life that would never be again. She wanted to be loved, and you wanted your family back. The two weren't so different when you looked at it.

Your momentary lapse of focus had let the girl in front of you slip through the cracks of your mind, and you watched it happen before your eyes the second it did. You knew Yennefer hadn't seen or smelt any apple tarts this time, going by her startled expression.

"Your village was pillaged, they set it ablaze. You burned with it." She muttered stoically, matter-of-factly, and her face dropped the second you had regained focus and realised the severity of your predicament if she looked a little further. She'd heard the childlike laughter of your siblings, the feel of a horse's mane through your fingers, felt the parental love and then it had all been replaced by death. Yennefer felt guilty for sensing the slight pang of jealousy when she'd realised you'd had a big and loving family that had been your entire world, but it had disappeared as soon as she'd realised what you'd lost, what you'd seen and experienced.

Your chest heaved with the effort it took you to push her out again and to lock away the details of what she'd seen.

Abruptly, as if stung by a bee, Yennefer stood up and crossed the distance to where Tissaia was seated, puffing her cigar and hawk eyes already watching her.

"Y/N's biggest fear is fire."

All the girls broke their connections and stopped to watch. Tissaia stared at the girl in front of her, "Of course, the girl who came here almost burned to a crisp is afraid of fire. Anyone here could have made that assessment."

"Well, it is."

"Is it, pup?"

All eyes now went to you.

Yennefer was right, of course. But there was one thing you feared more than anything else, and the one thing that had come true. Hurting and losing the ones you love. But, perhaps, now that that fear had already happened, there was something else weighing heavily on you— you were afraid to have to tackle this life you had been thrown into alone. It scared you immensely.

"Is it really your greatest fear?

"No." And perhaps it really wasn't. Not anymore. Not after weeks spent working with fire.

"She's lying. I saw what I saw!" Yennefer's frustrated eyes flitted from Tissaia to you. She remembered what else she'd seen make an entrance into her mind, but had deemed insignificant then— cliffsides, the view from on top of towers and the fast beating of your fearful heart that came with it, "Heights. You're afraid of heights."

That's when you realised Yennefer had seen what you had wanted her to see. You had successfully warped her imagination and shown her whatever you had carefully created.

When you didn't say anything, Yennefer glanced back at Tissaia in a plea.

"You take weeks to lift a stone. You can't bend water. You struggle to perform the simplest physical tasks. And now you put me and my lesson to shame by making things up?"

Yennefer's resolve crumbled slightly under Tissaia's hard glare and crushing words, but it was what was said next that dealt the final blow.

"Your worst fear makes such sense. Even if you were a beauty, still, no one would love you."

Tissaia was right, of course, and perhaps it had been exactly the reason why Yennefer lay tossing and turning in bed later that night. She knew that the ugliness of her features had started to seep through to her personality as well, like some sort of shield to keep people from hurting her. If she was rude and brash, no one would realise how their words and stares would hurt. Surely they'd stop after coming to that realisation. And if she hurt them first, they would never dare hurt her in return. It was a play of dominance, a change she'd had to make after arriving at Aretuza, for leading with kindness had never worked out in her old life. Time and time again, her efforts at making friendships and helping villagers out, hovering around them so she wouldn't be alone and could pretend to be part of their conversations, had only ever resulted in harsh hand gestures, cursed words and turned backs to send her off. Which had then resulted in a scolding and beating from her step-father, who'd felt ashamed that the villagers had come complaining about his strange stepdaughter. Yennefer knew she wasn't lovable. And if she ever found someone willing to look past her deformities, they surely would wince and run when they'd realised how rotten she'd become on the inside as well.

Then she heard it— a set of soft knocks on her door. She'd almost played it off as a sound born from her sleep-deprived state, but no, someone was really knocking on her door. She kicked her sheets off in a huff, made it to the door and threw it open, ready to give them a piece of her mind. She had half expected one of her so-called friends to knock for some late-night gossip. And although the girl in front of her was a classmate, yes, she wasn't exactly a friend.

Taken by surprise, Yennefer's voice was small when she muttered, "Y/N?"

"You were right. I don't like fire." You pushed out, as if you could no longer bear to live with the deceit. "And I don't necessarily like heights either."

"Why couldn't you have said that when it mattered?"

Yennefer stared at you, brows furrowed, jaw locked and a clear mix of fury, defeat and annoyance etched into her features as you had been the one behind her humiliation when you'd kept silent.

You didn't have an answer to her question, so you stood there and watched her. She raised her brows, clearly waiting for whatever you'd knocked for to come out of your mouth.

"We weren't set out to like each other, were we?"

Yennefer snorted, opened the door further and walked off to the fireplace. It was a clear invitation to enter her room, so you took it. Her perceptive eyes watched as you approached, standing right beside her in front of the fireplace, hands tightly clasped together behind your back. You might have felt a little more confident around flames, but reaching out to warm your hands to them and risking letting your Chaos take over felt a little too daring.

"I did extend you an olive branch, or have you forgotten?"

"You couldn't have approached me at a worse time," You sighed, remembering the absolute horror you'd felt as the trauma of what had happened had still coursed through your veins when Yennefer had slipped into your room that very first night to introduce herself. "And your approach wasn't exactly tactile or peaceful either, but I've grown to accept that's just how you handle things— impetuous and direct."

Yennefer would've glared at you, had your tone not been soft instead of accusatory. You were merely stating the obvious without further judgment.

You added, somewhat amused, "I still think it wouldn't hurt to be a little kinder, though."

Yennefer nibbled her lip, taking your words into consideration. She looked back up at you, contemplating hard. Everything inside of her wanted her to push out a harsh retort so you would back off, but you weren't hurting her. Not really. You had come here, for her, to apologise. You weren't here to make fun of her, nor did you look at her differently whenever your eyes met hers. Nor did you ever gape at her hunched back or crooked jaw. And you weren't being rude to her, you were... merely pointing out her behaviour. It was a welcome feeling to be treated like a normal human being.

"What if I were to ask again?"

It was quiet for a little while, only the cracking of the fire filling the silence. Yennefer felt her insecurity eat at her and was ready to take her words back when a gentle grin tugged at the corners of your mouth,

"I'll have to think about it."

Yennefer cracked the tiniest smile in return, feeling normal under your gaze. Then, you turned on your heel and she watched you walk towards the door. You lingered in the doorway,

"I'll see you at detention tomorrow. Somehow I just know tomorrow's the day we'll finally transfer water."

As you left, Yennefer was just as restless as before, but for the right reasons this time.

☾ ⋆*·ﾟ:⋆*·ﾟ:⠀ *⋆.*:·ﾟ .: ⋆*·ﾟ: .⋆

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