#actually incontinent

[wiliebe]

Jetzt muss der Elefant leider entsorgt werden! 😢😇👶🏻🍼

[wet-thistle]

Soggy soggy little prince OwO

[diaperalex]

Elevators… Perfect place for systematic diaper check… and selfies.🤷🏼‍♂️

[perplexingluciddreams]

Notice something maybe interesting (maybe obvious but I just realise now). With bladder incontinence, certain positions/movements stop bladder releasing, because muscles tense (I think).

At least for me whose incontinence is probably worsened by low muscle tone, that is the case. For example, when I am swinging, my bladder does not leak at all, but then I stop and it is like a flood releases - probably because those muscles relax.

I also have to sit a certain way on the toilet to voluntarily empty my bladder, and when I walk I will only occasionally leak in between steps (only if my bladder is very full).

It is just interesting to me, the effect that muscles have on each other. I don't know if this is the same for other people, but that is how it seems to work for my body.

Maybe this is TMI, but I don't have a good sense of that. Either way, I don't think incontinence is shameful or bad so I will post about it freely. It is just a part of being disabled for me.

[[Please do not sexualise.]]

[mamasvamp]

TW: slight vent, internalized ableism(?)

Honestly I do not like school because every day i get made fun of and it makes me wonder what I’ve done wrong but then I remember that it’s because I’m autistic that I get bullied and I just think I’m so embarrassing

Some of my traits of autism are embarrassing to talk about and I get made fun of for them

I get so anxious in public that I can’t go out without a stuffed animal

I don’t have any friends in my year so I have to eat in the Learning Development Unit at lunch

A teacher is always with me

I can’t do my own hair

I don’t walk normal

I wear a communications lanyard

I have minor urinary urge incontinence and I’m constantly worrying that I’ll have an accident and get bullied more

I cry a lot and sometimes age regress because I can’t control my emotions

I don’t like this stuff about me because it gets me bullied but I can’t change it and it makes me sad, people mock me and whisper to each other about me and I don’t like it I’m sad

I don’t think Herbert or Krolock would bully me for this things but, again, I do not know

[cutiecubbycaleb]

Incontinence comes with it's perks. It's a little embarrassing at first, but when you get to have your bottom look this cute and feel this poofy it takes some of that away. It's all about your perspective on things. Being a SFW age regressor it just kinda worked out for me. Peeing myself makes me feel smol and it took me a while to not be ashamed of the accidents I was having and being scared to wear actual diapers instead of pullups. But thanks to my mommy, @missthorne, I became brave enough to want to wear. And now I feel happier than ever being pamped 24/7.

This was a scary transition but I'm happy to finally be able to live the life I want and not be scared of being judged.

No one is crotch watching you. No one is going to judge you. Wear a long shirt and cover it up. Wear a very long undershirt and tuck it into your pants if you really wanna hide that pamp.

It's scary but it's been so worth it. Now I can be baby brained wherever I go and not be afraid of that.

[incontinenthater]

Hi everyone

i'm a disabled person hoping to meet other disabled people. I have several diagnoses that can be found in my bio.

[bambamatl]

Can someone send me a pack of diapers? Iv never asked for anything on any platform. I get up and go to work too. But I chose electric over diapers and it's gonna be about 5 days before I can get more.

[barcodeboyz]

Tw about rape

I hate him. I just pissed myself in a rental car because I couldn’t wait 2 extra minutes. Incontinence is something I’ve struggled with since the rape. Its not my first time pissing myself in front or people but its the first time I did it in front of my parents and I’m fucking mortified. I hate him. He made me this way.

[octal-codes]

Shout out to autistics who:

Don't know much about their special interests

Likes food commonly disliked by other autistics

Dislikes food commonly liked by other autistics

Enjoy social settings

Use sign language as their primary form of communication

Use diapers or have troubles with toileting

Like childish things or age regress

Are unable to work

Are unable to figure out their gender

[crippledpunks]

shoutout to every person who deals with incontinence. i dealt with bedwetting up until my early teens, and now deal with stress and urge incontinence and for years never wanted to talk about it because of the shame and stigma other people place on not being able to control your bladder or bowel movements.

incontinence is a disability. it's not gross or wrong to talk about incontinence. incontinent people are not dirty or disgusting. if we could control these parts of our body, we would. we're not an inconvenience for being this way, and we don't have to be treated like a burden or like we need to be "fixed".

whether or not you use incontinent products like briefs, pads, diapers, plastic bed sheets, or whatever else, you are loved, important, and deserved to be seen when there are conversations about disability awareness and acceptance. we don't deserve to hide in shame when all we need is to be accommodated and accepted.

[tykeabletay]

Oops 🙊

[briarpatch-kids]

Wearing diapers, needing a bed pad (chux) or wearing underwear liners for incontinence is actually way more common than a lot of people think. When I started having to wear them, it was really stressful and upsetting until a lot of other people in my life were like "hey, I use those too!"

So if you're having accidents, leaking, having too much moisture, whatever the case may be, try incontinence products. They're totally normal and a part of a lot of people's lives. It's such a relief to not worry about having an accident, you deserve that feeling too.

[wronggalaxy]

I've seen people doing "shout out to disabled people with gross traits", so I thought I would do my own, but with traits I've never seen discussed in these posts(an asterisk (this thing: *) after it means it’s something I expirence)

So, shout out to disabled people who:

—Can't always wash their hands after using the toilet. *

—Who wet/mess themselves in bed(and can't clean it up) because "I can't leave bed" means I can't leave bed.

—Who get nosebleeds because they pick their nose so much. *

—Who can take a bath/shower, put on deodorant, and put on freshly washed clothes and still smell 'bad'. *

—Who can't help but get food/drink/blood/snot/etc. on their books/comics/magazines when they try to read. *

—Who eat everything with their hands. *(I've eaten cereal and soup with mine on multiple occasions)

—Who have/have had moldy dishes/pop bottles/wrappers/food/etc in their room for weeks or months or years or longer. *(I just recently had help from a sibling to replace my broken furniture, clean up my space, and throw out trash. Before that I had moldy stuff in my room for up to 4 or 5 years for some of it.)

—Who have never had bed wetting problems, but do struggle to stay dry during the day. *(Bed wetting is valid too, of course, and so is doing both, I've just seen people talk about bed wetting, but not day wetting.)

—Who eat things(specifically non-food things)you know you shouldn't. *(I'll eat just about anything(just not most foods), but I'm big on styrofoam and old chipped paint from my walls)

—Who don't know/can't use "basic manners" *

—And a bunch of other stuff I can't think of right now(feel free to add more in comments/reblogs)

There is no shame here.

[clownrecess]

(TW FOR ABLEISM, MELTDOWNS, ETC.)

Supporting disabled people is more than just supporting us when you think its cute, easy, or beneficial for you.

If your support ends when you see an adult in public with a diaper bulge, you aren't supporting disabled people.

If your support ends when you see someone drooling, you aren't supporting disabled people.

If your support ends when someone has a violent meltdown in public, you aren't supporting disabled people.

If your support ends when someone needs help being fed, you aren't supporting disabled people.

Etc. Etc. Etc.

I know that you dont think its cute or aesthetically pleasing to try and calm me down and be understanding of me when I throw my communication device across the room and slam my head into the ground because someone laughed too loudly, I know that you think its embarrassing. I know you dont think it's all "uwu cute tism" when I can't shower for a week straight and spend the whole day crying, yelling, and biting myself, but if that makes you angry at me, you arent supporting disabled people.

What is your limit to supporting disabled people? What is your limit to being okay with the fact that I am NOT like your nondisabled friends?

Where does the support end and the disgust start? How long until we are "too disabled" for you?

/not at anyone specific

[diaperedautistic]

finding diapers as a continent/semicontinent autistic

(This essay is not in Plain Language. Please tell me if you want a Plain Language version and I will write one.)

I was slow to toilet train: I routinely came home wet from kindergarten and was still wetting myself occasionally in third grade and later. This was mostly an executive function problem; I usually knew I had to pee, but didn't have the executive function to stop whatever I was doing to use the bathroom.

I didn't get much in the way of help for this: I was kicked out of diapers before entering kindergarten. In kindergarten and first grade, I was 'on a schedule', which meant staff would pull me out of class to take me to use the bathroom periodically, hopefully before I'd wet myself. As early as kindergarten, my parents yelled at me for wetting myself, and past first grade, yelling was all the help I got. No one suggested diapers as a way to avoid the shame and humiliation of accidents; it was apparently better for a third-grader to wet herself in front of her classmates than for her to wear diapers.

Eventually, like some autistics, I 'grew out' of it: I learned to absorb the executive function cost of interrupting myself to go pee, or the pain of holding it because I didn't want to interrupt myself, and I stopped wetting myself.

At some level, though, I always understood that diapers were something I needed: when I hit puberty, they became a fetish object; when I transitioned in my late twenties, they shifted to a non-sexual emotional comfort, and I started wearing them more often. As I worked through some of my childhood trauma in therapy, they shifted again, to a radical way of 'rewriting the story' for my younger self who'd needed them, and I started wearing them full-time.

(I want to stop here and acknowledge that I was privileged to be able to make this change in my life: I can afford to live by myself to avoid judgmental family or housemates, and I can afford to buy disposable diapers out of pocket. Many people can't, and I'd love to see diapers as a voluntary adaptation for autistics destigmatized and covered by insurance.)

Once I was wearing diapers full-time, something magical happened: my brain settled back into those same patterns from elementary school, using my diaper when I'm hyperfocused and using the toilet when I'm not. I find focused tasks easier and less stressful, since I don't have to interrupt myself to go use the bathroom in the moment or cope with the ongoing sensory and executive function cost of feeling and knowing that I have to go to the bathroom eventually. I don't worry about burning something on the stove, forgetting important context while programming, or losing the plot of a movie or TV show I wanted to watch. I can get what I wanted to get done more easily, and have more energy and cope left for other things.

Despite the obvious benefits, I still felt ashamed when I found myself wet after a period of hyperfocus; I wasn't 'supposed' to wet myself, and I wasn't 'supposed' to wear diapers.

A couple weeks ago, as part of a larger effort to find better accommodations for myself, I found @endeverstar's wonderful article "Finding AAC as a verbal/semiverbal autistic". It talks about how xe found speaking with mouth words difficult and stressful but was nonetheless forced into a bunch of speech therapy as a kid so xe could be considered "speaking"; nobody offered xem AAC as a kid because xe didn't 'need' it and it was stigmatized. Xe discovered AAC as an adult, quickly realized it was easier and less stressful than mouth words, and is at this point mostly-nonspeaking.

This was me, toilet training, and diapers. Everything suddenly made sense.

I found toileting without diapers as a backup difficult and stressful, but was nonetheless forced to so I could be considered "toilet trained"; nobody offered me diapers as a kid past the 'normal' age because I didn't 'need' them and they were stigmatized. I rediscovered diapers as an adult, realized they were easier and less stressful, and decided to wear them all the time.

Overnight, that last whiff of shame disappeared. Diapers aren't just a fetish object, an emotional comfort, or a way of 'rewriting' my trauma. Diapers are a valid adaptive choice for autistics, even those who are technically capable of always using the toilet!

So, to paraphrase endever*: if you're a continent or mostly-continent autistic person and you're wondering whether diapers might be useful for you -- consider this your permission slip! You're allowed to try them if you think they might help, and you're allowed to keep using them if you find them helpful. Toileting works for abled people, but isn't inherently superior; don't listen to anyone who says you're 'not allowed' to use diapers unless you 'need' them or that you should force yourself to always use the toilet if that doesn't work for you.

Everyone deserves access to the full range of communication methods that work for them, and likewise everyone deserves access to the full range of toileting strategies that work for them.