#admittedly i'm not as fond of this piece now that i'm coming back to it

[para-psych-doodles]

SMACK!!

[onekisstotakewithme]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

I was tagged by the incomparable @remyfire (a few days ago now, sorry!) so thank you so so much for the tag!!

I think pretty much everyone I know/would tag has been tagged already, so if you haven't been yet, or if you just want to do this, please do! (Answers are under the cut because 20 questions take up a lot of space)

How many works do you have on AO3? 209, ish. (two fics still in the anon stage of exchanges!)

What's your total AO3 word count? 1,377,748 words! (so 1.3 million!!) 217k of that for this year 😅 but of course I haven't published everything I wrote this year so that number is a LITTLE low.

What fandoms do you write for? M*A*S*H and The West Wing, primarily.

What are your top five fics by kudos? Ties That Bind (Star Trek); a wild call and a clear call (that may not be denied) (Star Trek); Uncharted Territory (M*A*S*H); ye who are weary, come home (M*A*S*H); Beautiful to Take a Chance (M*A*S*H). so my readers like the spirk and the beejhawk (plus my M*A*S*H ensemble piece!) even if the actual kudos counts are probably pretty humble.

Do you respond to comments? I don't usually, and I should, but I get a little overwhelmed. I DO try and leave a thank you note in the end notes of each chapter though, because I love and cherish each comment.

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? I'm admittedly not typically an angst writer, so I had to think hard on this one. I go in usually for bittersweet or even happy endings... i guess probably 'a wild call and a clear call (that may not be denied)', if only because it's a pon farr fic and Jim and Spock are essentially 'mated' now, but uh. They don't end up together at the end of the fic.

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Ah. see, this is more my speed. I like to think i write realistically happy endings... the happiest ending? I've written many (not enough 'happy endings' wink wink) but the happiest in context, I'd say, is the end of katabasis. a decision is made to keep going, to keep living. i also have a soft spot for you were meant for me (aka Peg sees Singin' in the Rain and decides to choose polyamory).

Do you get hate on fics? Not so far! But I also don't write particularly controversial subjects on a regular basis... I have had a few comments over the years that misunderstood what I was doing, but I'm reluctant to classify those as hate.

Do you write smut? If so, what kind? Uh. I write smut. I only publish some of it, because I'm so incredibly self-conscious about it. I want to write more, but I genuinely can't tell if what I'm writing is good/hot or not because I do not have the distance to do it. I'll write smut of all kinds (hell, I have a triad draft with everything from oral to pegging in it. it has not yet seen the light of day) but publishing it is another story. I really want to get better at it, but I have no idea how to get over myself. (it's the religious upbringing/repression/whatever but either way. sucks ass.)

Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written? I don't typically write crossovers! I have a few that have chewed on my brain for a few years but don't exist yet (M*A*S*H x Star Trek:TOS) plus a few I think would just be funny (Hawkeye running as a third party candidate in the 1998 election in West Wing). But I haven't. Anyway, someday I'm going to write that MASH/Trek crossover and then it's over for all of you.

Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not to my knowledge!

Have you ever had a fic translated? Yes! My fic "Here's Hoping We Meet Now and Then" (aka BJ gets everyone to help him with the goodbye rocks) was translated into German by my dear friend @vanillatumbleweedscoffee. You can find that translation here.

Have you ever co-written a fic before? I have! And tbh, I love the idea of collaborating more. (HMU). My friend (and beta) and I wrote a Charles/Donna fic back in 2020 or so, called "getting to like you (getting to hope you like me)" and I'm quite fond of it honestly. Plus a few verses that I've contributed to, but I don't know if those count as true collabs... More collabs!!!

What's your all time favorite ship? Ooh. Probably CJ/Danny, punnihawk (BJ/Peg/Hawkeye), beejhawk and Charles/Donna. No, I'm not narrowing it down any further. (Bisexuals? Choosing ONE thing? no.)

What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? Okay. Sad moment of truth: I want to edit and post "make of our hearts, one heart" so badly. But I got so burnt out in the process of writing it, and editing 125,000 words is a particularly daunting task especially considering I think I basically have to rewrite it from the ground up... plus also not knowing if anyone even still wants to read it isn't helping (but that might be all in my head.) Essentially, I want the 125,000 pound albatross removed from its place around my neck. But do I think I'll finish it? I don't know. It has the triad wedding, literally all the smut that's fit to print (pegging! oral! one of my favourite BJ/Peg scenes!)... idk. Is it defeatist? Yes. I want to. I just don't know if I can.

What are your writing strengths? Dialogue. I think I'm pretty good at getting the vibes of characters. I'm good at coming up with plot concepts, and pretty decent at description. I think I'm good at fleshing out character backstories and giving voices to underutilized characters (Peg, Donna).

What are your writing weaknesses? Smut. all the way down. (If anyone out there has read my smut and has suggestions on how to improve... hmu). I can fully admit that I struggle with finding what I write hot, I struggle with sexy descriptions and honestly I just feel very self-conscious about the whole process. But I want to get better at it. I just don't quite know how. Is this too honest?

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? The occasional phrases, sure, but the only language I know besides English is French and that's more of an "I can read it" than "I can write it" situation. So overall? no.

First fandom you wrote for? Lost. (lmao). Followed by Downton Abbey. All of them still linger in their terrible glory on my ffnet account.

(Part 20 continued in reblog)

[cuoredimuschio]

legally I’m probably supposed to ask for more sentences from the bang but you know I can resist line of apsides sooooo 🤲💕

lex!!! i happily excuse you from any legal obligation because i'm always thrilled to write a bit more in apsides, my beloved!!! thank you!!! 💜💜💜💜

here's a chunk from august, 1992:

The wind has adopted a bite, laced a chill into its gusts, but Eddie sheds his coat, tossing it in a familiarly thoughtless heap on the ground. He rolls up his sleeves, one at a time, imprecise, absent. There’s flock of bats where Steve’s work once was. One of many pieces of ink that now adorn Eddie’s skin. All in black. A lot cleaner and a thousand times better, admittedly, than Steve’s amateur doodle. “I still play, though,” Eddie says, yanking him back to the present. “Write a bit here and there too. There’s this, uh, little dive bar in town. Not a huge metal scene, but I grace ‘em with a taste of my unbridled talent every once in a while.” Steve scoffs, but it comes out smothered in the same fondness that stains his smile; he wipes it off on his shoulder.  “Jesus, good to know your ego’s still intact.” The last remnants of the sun are long gone now, but Eddie’s eyes shimmer with a light all their own. “Not just intact, baby. Inflated. Beyond belief.” Baby. The name dumps a heap of sugar into his blood, stirs a jolt into his heart. His chest pulls tight, the same way it had the first time Eddie let that little word drop from his lips, tucked away under the stars, barely a breath and almost lost in the breeze. He still remembers the smell of the ocean that night; it hung so heavy in the air, stuck in every corner of his lungs, the scent of the unknown, discovery, and the deepest shade of blue before black.

[egittae]

Dimitri still remained uncertain of what to make of the man's presence - they had spent some time together, now, had even perhaps come to be what one might have seen as friendly, but there was a tension that lingered that Dimitri could not shake. Not a strain, but a lack that left his mind wanting, searching.

He could not have framed it in any way that slotted into the bounds of logic, and he could not help but remain suspicious but...

The man was family, regardless of proximity. Main or branch house, or even some farflung bastard...Professor Lambert was Blaiddyd, and there remained few enough of them on this earth.

Even if he was unfriendly, even if the casual affection and the laidback manner did not put Dimitri at his ease, he would pay his dues to the blood that came before him, and would treasure the bond, however tenuous.

"Professor Lambert! It is a surprise and a pleasure to see you've attended this...well, I suppose it is not a mission nor a seminar in truth. But I am pleased to see you with us regardless." He approached with an extended hand, the appropriate greeting, he thought.

Then, a laugh. "Oh - you've already begun turning quite red. I'm afraid that's probably our lot as northern men isn't it! I hope that this is the extent of our suffering during our time here."

Meant in jest, but Dimitri still had a long way to go when it came to humor.

The pieces of cloth made it easy enough to spot who belonged to each team. By now he had already managed to spot all of his companions, flying the green banner of…the rat, which was quite the choice for an animal to represent them, but at this point the professor was no longer surprised by it, much less offended. If anything he found it a tad amusing, even more so when he was so used to seeing specific students and faculty wearing colors much different from the ones that signaled their allegiances back at the academy. His own Wolves included.

And one that seemed to undergo that color change was the prince of Faerghus, Dimitri. A sash of red contrasted with the blues of the kingdom in the boy’s summer outfit, the sight odd but at the same time intriguing enough to earn a small curious smile from the professor. “Dimitri! You seem to be in good spirits, that is great to see. Indeed, I too was pulled into this event…as a participant, which caught me off guard, admittedly.” He thought he’d be a staff member or something- as he was usually placed with the faculty. “But I shall not complain. We should simply wait and see what comes to fruition.”

He shook the offered hand without hesitation, his smile growing slightly more fond before a hearty laugh made its way out of it. “Ah…unfortunately there is not much that can be done to hide it, though thankfully a good friend of mine granted me mercy by applying some ointment to my skin to at least ease the burns.” Morion’s help did make things better- Lambert could only hope the sun didn’t fry him any more. 

“Haha, even if worse comes to take place I honestly think it will be more manageable than fighting against the Goddess’ light itself! This body of mine is doing its best to not become that of a fried shrimp.”

[trenchcoatsbi]

I'm going to fucking cry

I q!jaiden am cannonically death thanks to that fucking nuclear bombs

I'm so angry and so hurt and so confused and yet I know that its no one's fault is not cc!jaiden's fault god of course not is not her fault is no one's she has just been focusing more on her mental health which is amazing! But

I'm left there, I died, again I fucking died again and I will never come back and I could never meet my new daughter or be able to make new memories in a new island or see my team again I'm condemmed to be a ghost again meanwhile I WATCH

Meanwhile I watch everything go without me

Being death once in the same canon already hurted even if not as much anymore, now? I'm gone, again and the pain is back and maybe is a good thing, maybe is good that I am back with bobby and maybe there is a slim possibility I'll be able to come back as a ghost

Yet is not fair I didn't wanted to die not again

I wanted to live and be part of things along with everyone, everyone will forget me I know they will

-(cannon divergent llulah anon) jaiden qsmp⭑

sorry this took me a sec to get around to wacky shifts make it hard for me to reply to things sometimes anyway uhm i am not good at comfort, doubly so right now. I would like to say this much at least… I remember you, and will remember you. Perhaps it’s not much, this is coming from a very uhm canon divergent guy (as far as I know?) but as a federation spy in charge of surveilling the islanders for some time I grew rather fond of several islanders, you (Jaiden) among them. It was an honor to have known you even just in my strange distant way.

Admittedly most of my surveillance of you was on “orders” from Cucurucho… That damn bear loved playing favorites and would send me to keep an eye on you any time I was free. I would not say we were friends, but I like to imagine that we could have been. I know your friends (the real ones who got to know you) will mourn you. You weren’t like me, going about trying not to make an impact, hiding from people and planning to hurt them, you had people that loved you dearly. You had a life on the island and your absence will surely be felt.

I hope the afterlife is kind to you. I cannot say I know what it was like on the qsmp (can’t recall dying there in any way that matters so I don’t know what it’s like) but it doesn’t seem to be the worst? those things are complicated though so i cant say for sure. At least you’re with your son, reunited far too early perhaps, but that’s how the world works. I hope you rest well, dying and or dealing with death is never pleasant, all we can do is pick up the pieces, but we never have to do it alone unless we want to do so. Feel free to mourn here whenever you want. -K

[life-of-kalos]

I think you have some really good anatomy when it come to humans and pokemon, and really good skill when it comes to colors and lighting and even backgrounds!! I think something to work on however is consistency, i’ve noticed that your style can be super detailed one minute, or a different style the next, which is totally fine depending on how much time you have! That or it could be one rendered panel and the others are colorless. Some advice could be mayhaps simplifying coloring some asks if you’re worries about putting them out on time, or taking some extra time to ensure a style is consistent across a sequential set of panels? put your efforts into a style you can easily use for asks and save that detailed style for more important panels you want to emphasize! I hope this didn’t sound too confusing, art is hard, but don’t forget you’re doing great!! its all a journey!

You're so right. I constantly change my style. It's mainly because I'm not satisfied with how I draw now so every time I draw I try to change things up in a way I might like. I'm currently going through a "what do I want my style to be" kind of phase so things have been very all over the place. That's honestly why I'm asking for feedback OTL I really want to love my style but I get bored with it after doing the same one a few times lol and admittedly, I use this blog as a way to try new ones out.

I've only recently been testing waters with lighting. I used to only do clean line art with flat color and simple shades but It became boring to me. Now I've been trying messy lines with more detail coloring. I am quite fond of it but there's still a lot more I need to figure out.

I tend to do colorless sketches as a quick way to tell more story without taking too much time. And throw in a detailed piece when there's more of a tone I want to set. It may seem lazy but I really don't have time to color all of my sketches. And honestly I lose stamina after coloring one piece lmao. I haven't really stepped back and took time on this blog because I'm trying to tell a story within this decade haha I'm not very fast at drawing so I cut corners when I can.

But you're completely right. I need to focus if I want to improve. Find a simple style for asks that I can do consistently and experiment on the side. Thank you for your feedback!

[manicmarsupial]

So Close

Another piece of the size-shifter Hosea AU I'm working on with a friend.

Agent Andrew Milton closes in on the Van Der Linde gang.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Agent Milton was having a good day. He was getting closer to eliminating the Van Der Linde gang. Although he felt it was too lenient of him to offer Morgan his freedom if he turned in Van Der Linde. To be honest with himself, he would have ordered Ross to shoot Morgan had there not been a child going fishing with the notorious gunman. He would have concocted a story about a fight and Morgan was shot in self defense. Both he and Ross would be rewarded. He could honestly say he kept his promise that the outlaw ‘won’t swing’. That plan went cock-eyed as Morgan was unwavering in his loyalty, a fact Milton both admired and cursed. If Morgan hadn’t been so protective of the little child, Milton would have rescued the poor boy from a life on the run.

Milton’s informant within the gang wrote to tell him the next camp spot was in Dewberry Creek, or so they were trying to convince the leader. Not particularly fond of staying outdoors himself, but an easily flooded creekbed in the open seemed rather stupid. If Van Der Linde were to actually consider it, Milton would seriously doubt the man’s intelligence.

Fortunately, Milton decided to take a look at the place himself. Luckily he did, as it was empty. Another letter received from his informant told him Morgan and some other deluded soul by the name of Charles Smith had found another place nearby called Clemens Point.

In hindsight, it wasn’t the best idea to have a bloodthirsty idiot like Micah Bell as an informant. While he had managed to convince Der Linde to rob the ferry, he’d also massacred most of Strawberry just for his guns. Milton wondered if he should have tried to utilize one of the ladies of the night instead. They were just whores after all. Playthings to please the degenerates. He could get them out of that life. The more he thought about it, the more he mentally kicked himself for not coming up with that idea sooner. But what’s done is done.

Admittedly, there was a time Milton would have gotten as many agents as he could and stormed the campsite, but he was no longer young and stupid. He had a family. If he did a reckless assault, he’d lose his job and his family would have no income. Walking straight into the lion’s den was only risking his and Ross’ own lives. If the savages opened fire, he’d die with honor. He would get a posthumous award and the agency would provide for his family. That was the worst case scenario. Either outcome he was surely to go down in history for breaking up a notorious gang without bloodshed.

Once again, loyalty screwed him over. He tried to persuade Van Der Linde to come quietly, even giving the rest of the gang three whole days to split up and vanish. Van Der Linde was willing, but Milton and Ross found themselves staring down the barrels of a dozen guns. Admittedly, Milton blew his top. He’d been more than generous with his offer of freedom in exchange for Van Der Linde, but these degenerates refused him. Next time, he wasn’t going to be so forgiving.

The disappearance of Bronte was the least of Milton’s concern, though there were more Pinkertons in Saint Denis now. More importantly, the Van Der Linde gang was going to rob the bank. The actual city bank. Bell had told him it was going ahead. The old man was going to create a diversion, and while the local law was distracted, Dutch’s boys were going to rob the bank. As Milton wrote back to Bell, he’d be lying if he said he didn’t contemplate not sending the letter telling Bell to wear something that stood out so his men didn’t shoot him. Bell replied simply: “white suit.”

Luck was on the agent’s side. He’s seen the old man pass by. Although it went against every fibre of his being to let the dynamite explode, it was imperative he leave it alone otherwise all his effort would be for naught. At least the old man was considerate enough to set it off in an unpopulated area.

As Milton sees the old man undoubtedly making an escape, the agent emerges from the darkness of an alley, resisting a chuckle at the theatrical side of it.

“Well, as I live and breathe, Hosea Matthews, conman and the co-founder of the Van Der Linde gang,” he drawls, mocking a hick accent.

“Andrew Milton...I’d say it’s a pleasure, but I’d be lying,” Matthews replies with fake sincerity.

If Milton has to resort to shooting this man, he would almost feel bad about it. Shame such a talent was wasted with degenerates.

Whatever way this plan went, either Matthews would be dead or Van Der Linde soon would be. Without the leader, the gang would fall. If Matthews dies, Van Der Linde would be so overcome with grief that he’ll destroy the gang himself. It was too perfect.

Milton’s brought back to reality by a chuckle that’s not his own. Matthews shouldn’t be laughing, especially when a gun is trained on his back.

“What’s so funny?” the agent demands.

“You really have cotton wool between your ears, Moron,” the conman laughs, the sound slowly getting deeper.

At first Milton dismissed it as a trick of the light, but it wasn’t. With every step, Matthews was growing taller. Milton hurries to fire his pistol, only for Matthews to whirl around, clamping a serving tray-sized hand around the agent’s own. The now rapidly growing hand clenches tighter. Milton restrains a scream of pain as he feels his fingers contort and crack around the gun. He’s yanked up into the air, pain coursing through his arm.

“Who told you about us?” Matthews thunders.

The impressive buildings of Saint Denis barely reach the giant’s waist.

“If I tell you, will you let me go?” Milton pleads.

“I won’t kill you. Deal?” Matthews smirks.

Knowing that’s all he’ll get, Milton agrees.

“Micah Bell. Since Blackwater. Set up the ferry job to catch Van Der Linde. Promised I’d keep the bounty hunters off his back ‘til Van Der Linde was caught. Give him a blank slate in return,” out of sheer panic, Milton can’t form complete sentences.

Matthews scoffs; the gust is almost gale force for Milton.

“I knew that bastard couldn’t be trusted.”

“Are you going to let me go now?” Milton stammers.

“We had a deal.”

Matthews rolls his eyes.

“I said I wouldn’t kill you. I’m holding up my end of the deal.”

Dark fabric walls ascend above the agent as Matthews releases Milton’s crushed hand, dropping him into a pocket. He counts what’s left of his blessings that he landed softly as the darkness suffocates him.

“Now you stay right there, Andrew,” Matthews laughs, patting his pocket with his enormous hand, slamming Milton against the giant’s body.

He feels sick, both from the pain of his smashed hand and the sudden rocking motion. Matthews’ footsteps thunder along the streets of Saint Denis, no doubt causing property damage.

“Ah, Miss Roberts. Would you like a lift?” Matthews booms, presumably asking one of the trugs.

Milton feels the downward motion as Matthews crouches down, causing the agent to roll forward in the pocket. He tumbles back as Matthews stands.

Milton can hear the muffled faint screams, recognizing Henry McDavy’s scottish brogue yell “I resign my commission!” The screams get slightly louder, followed by a shattering crash. Milton jumps as there’s a loud bang like a boulder falling. He hears more screams as the pocket tilts.

“I’ve caught our rat,” the calm tone of the thundering voice chills Milton to the core.

“How’d you know?” Dutch’s voice sounds far away.

Milton is almost blinded as light streams in, only for the shadow of Matthews’ colossal hand to intrude. He shuffles back to avoid the reaching tree trunk sized fingers, to no avail as he’s grabbed around the waist. His struggles are futile against the immensely strong fingers. He glances around, catching sight of Bell in Matthews’ other hand, wrapped in a fist.

“You didn’t mention Matthews was a giant, Mr Bell!” Milton shouts.

“He’s lying,” Bell snarls.

Unheeding of the argument, Matthews drops both back into his jacket pocket.

“Time to go,” Matthews’ voice rumbles above like thunder.

Milton glares across at Bell, the throbbing pain of his damaged hand nothing compared to the anger he felt toward the hot-tempered outlaw.

“You didn’t think vital information like this would have been crucial to my investigation?” Milton snaps,

“I didn’t know,” Bell snippily replies.

“He’s not exactly invisible like that,” Milton retorts.

There’s a jarring motion as Matthews starts walking. Milton uses the momentum to punch Bell with his good hand. Bell predictably fights back dirty, but Milton has experience. The two continue fighting while being rocked about.

Bell had bitten Milton on the arm several times and nearly chomped his ear off. Milton retaliated by breaking Bell’s nose and knocking out some of the outlaw’s teeth. The agent staggers as a cool sensation and a feel of vertigo make him dizzy and sick. When light stings his eyes, his honed reflexes help him avoid the giant grasping fingers. Bell, with his frantic flailing, manages to sink his teeth onto one of the digits. The enormous hand quickly withdraws.

“One of them just bit me,” Matthews laughs, the resonating sound rattling Milton. 

He doesn’t have time to avoid the hand again and ends up enclosed in a fist. He tries not to vomit as he’s rapidly brought up to the immense, craggy face of Matthews. The giant gives a frighteningly large smirk before looking at some point behind Milton.

“Hey Dutch, got a present for you,” Matthews bellows, dropping Milton into Dutch’s waiting hands.

This was decidedly not a good day for Milton.

[the-final-knight]

Knight Log, volume 2:

It has been a few days since I last wrote in this book, I have been very busy.

There is a plot to assassinate me, Drewp, and The Queen and I am trying to stop them. I think that ive come up with a unique and cunning plan though that may give me the advantage. I shant disclose it here as I fear I am being watched.

The assassin is very clever but some sort of moral code has kept them from killing me thus far. They left me quite wounded from our last battle but I did the same to them. Hopefully it shall be a little bit until our next battle.

The Queen has asked me to accompany her and Drewp to the capital city of Yevrin, which I find very exciting. We are, however, riding in a Zeppelin which I find a little daunting. It's been ages since I've been up that high and I am admittedly slightly afraid of doing again. The Queen has assured me it's safe though and I trust her.

On the subject of The Queen I must say I am quite fond of her. She is definitely the nicest ruler I have served under and she tolerates my slip ups. She's been incredibly kind to me and even went searching in the forest for me after a nasty battle with that assassin. My leg still hurts from that, and I have a limp from it, but luckily no one has caught onto that. A knight must be strong through their pain in order to succeed, that is the lesson I have always known to be true.

I have sparring with people and am beginning to learn ways of how to counter magic uses, these are the most important things I've learned thus far:

Never let them have use of their hands or mouth

Resist mind control

Analyze their movements to prepare for any spell they may cast

Thankfully I have yet to face a magic user who actually has intent to harm me, that's lucky, but luck always runs out.

And now for what is by far the most interesting thing to happen in my life.

Someone is... Trying to romance me. I know, it sounds just as crazy to me as it must to you, imaginary reader. They have been keeping their identity a secret so far but have given me the name Augustus to call them by. Now, this is between you, the book, and me, but this is truly the scariest thing to ever happen to me. Never has someone called me the things they call me. Never has anyone gone out of their way and given me something such as what they have.

They gifted me a golden Zweihander. Can you believe that? Neither can I. I don't even know what to say to such a lavish gift. Thankyou is certainly not enough I know that, but I also have hardly anything myself. Before I came to this island I had only the clothes on my back and a few silver pieces. Now everything has changed for me and people actually seem to care about me.

Needless to say it's overwhelming. But also intoxicating. The Queen said that their pattern of gift giving and masquerading follows that of an old Yervin play. And on the fourth day they will reveal themself. If that's the case I don't have much time to think of something to do for them in return. I don't have much to offer someone like that I think, I have no money or promise. I hope they'll forgive me for that, if not I suppose I can give them their sword back.

Alright I think that's a nice wrap up of the past few days, I'm obviously leaving stuff out because of how much has happened but yeah. Have a good day book, farewell.

Ps: I hope the Augustus will forgive me for threatening to slice their throat.

[druidx]

A Year of Writing - 2022 Writing Wrap-up

I quite liked doing the "Your Writing Year in Review" thing last year, so decided to do it again.

➼ Quick Stats

Total Written - 92,157 words Average Words/Work: 4,388 Started in 2022 - 33 works Finished in 2022 (started anytime) - 21 works Published in 2022 (started anytime) - 36 works Number of Works still in Progress (started anytime): 79 Mostly wrote in: August, October & Dec (4 works each) Longest work completed or added to in 2022: The Ruby Falls (181,884) Shortest work completed or added to in 2022: wip - elo the 'beggar' (96) Top Genres: Fantasy Top WIP(s): The Ruby Falls Top OC(s): Aderyn, Mio, Rowan, Caseswing

Below the cut: 2022's Plans, Work I'm proud of, Work that shows I'm still learning, Breakdown of 2022, Plans for 2023, ICYMI

➼ What were my writing plans for 2022?

❌ Finish The Ruby Falls by April, published by October

HAHAHAHAHAHA! 💀❌💀

✅ Finish some of the then-68 WIPs from 2021 and prior

I managed 7 - 5 Oblivion fanfics, and 2 Starbound fanfics. 7 is better than 0, so I'm counting this objective as completed.

➼ Work I'm most proud of

It's a tossup between Abecean Blue and Tales of the Starbound: The Barkeep's Tale. I'm fond of the descriptions and flashbacks in Abecean Blue, but The Barkeep's Tale shows just how much I've grown and learned as a writer.

The Barkeep's Tale was started in 2015, and while admittedly it was part of a NaNo and I knew then it wasn't perfect, I thought it was reasonably well crafted. But when I rewrote it - nearly from scratch - and read it back, I realised just how much I've improved - mostly in the last 2 years.

➼ Work that shows I'm still learning

The Need for What We Can't Have, Long Past Dawn, and Strawberry Fizz. I can't write men. I can't write gay men. I can't write romance between men! Why are men so hard? (puns not intended)

All of those pieces feel tremendously flat to me. The descriptions are fine, but when it comes to men emoting, the dialogue... I just don't feel there's the same pizzazz as if you asked me to write a feral she-goblin.

➼ Breakdown of 2022

There have been a lot of IRL things going on this year, and I just haven't felt as creative as I have the past few years. The trip to Iceland was inspiring, yet that and the trip to Denmark took huge chunks out of my year (both were nearly 2 weeks each).

That being said, when I look at my stats for complete fics over the years, I can see that 2022 was nearly on par with 2020, with 21 vs 27. And even though I finished more works in 2021, my word count was much lower. I feel like I'm now at a happy balance between word count and finished works.

I also feel like I'm finishing a lot more things recently, even if they are fanfic, where historically I was writing novels and then running out of steam on them. I'm not sure if I can apply that to the past novels I've never finished/ edited enough to publish. Honestly, I don't know what I want to do with them at all...

➼ What are my writing plans for 2023?

Post The Ruby Falls.

Finish stuff. Post more 'For Posterity' items. Study Romance? Read more.

IDK, everything beyond The Ruby Falls is flexible currently.

➼ In Case You Missed It

Here's the list of all my work posted in 2022 (including some older works), separated by universe.

Original Series - Astyria's Star

Summer Prose Challenge 1 ~ 450. At the abandoned council chambers at Gont Point, Astyria considers the perils the people of Ilma face due to the rising acid seas. Read on Tumblr

Summer Prose Challenge 2 ~ 680. A grandmother recites a folk tale to her grandchildren. Read on Tumblr

Summer Prose Challenge 3 ~ 490. Astyria’s nephew has to complete a school assignment. Read on Tumblr

Summer Prose Challenge 4 ~ 920. We join Astryia at a council meeting to hear the options for dealing with Ilma’s climate issues. Read on Tumblr

Summer Prose Challenge 5 ~ 1,120. A talk show host discusses the current climate issues on Ilma. Read on Tumblr 

Original Work - 'For Posterity' Items

The Web ~ 176. How the spider invited its web. Read on Tumblr 

Lost on the Moor ~ 206. A girl with paranormal powers is on Dartmoor. Read on Tumblr 

The Frustrated Writer ~ 853. A girl complains to the reader that she has writers' block. Read on Tumblr 

The Fox ~ 437. A girl meets a fox. Read on Tumblr 

When I am old... ~ 273. A description of a woman's old aunt. Read on Tumblr 

Hungry... ~ 546. A woman's sick husband bites her, and she becomes very hungry. Read on Tumblr 

England Expects ~ 247. An old man reminisces about people taking responsibility for their community. Read on Tumblr 

GM Mutated Cheese ~ 282. A young boy experiments with cheese. Read on Tumblr 

Closure for a Silver Shilling ~ 328. A gravedigger is having trouble digging a grave. Read on Tumblr 

Other Original Works

The Need for What we Can't Have ~ 341. A mining clerk considers his religious colleague. Read on Tumblr

Uncertainty in the Weather ~322. A farmer's daughter reminisces. Read on Tumblr

Starbound

While the Sun Shines ~ 850. Mio enjoys a picnic with some of her residents. Read on AO3 or Tumblr

A Place No Good Man Should Go ~ 420. Oganesson introduces Yasahama to the Black Market. Read on AO3 or Tumblr

Tales of the Starbound: The Barkeep’s Tale ~ 3,240. Just a regular night in the Desert Rose; good times with good hooch and better company. Read on AO3 or Tumblr

Tales of the Starbound: The Miner’s Tale ~ 3,380. The logs of mine guard Devon Parker, detailing a year and a half of adventure. Read on AO3 or Tumblr

The Temple of the Fading Light ~ 592. Mio investigates an ancient temple and learns the dark secrets behind it. Read on AO3 or Tumblr

The ‘Shroom Witch ~ 785. Mio visits an agaran witch for help destroying the Ruin. Read on AO3 or Tumblr

TESIV: Oblivion - Modern AU

Strawberry Fizz ~ 219. Martin and Baurus take a summer holiday. Read on AO3 or Tumblr

Long Past Dawn ~ 646. Martin isn't fond of parties or unwanted female attention. Baurus has a solution... Read on AO3 or Tumblr

Self Indulgent AU ~ 8,274. The Hero of Kvatch is Martin’s Biological Child. Read on AO3 or Tumblr

Spiritus Alco Custodiat ~ 451. A jest from Jena turns swiftly sour. Read on AO3 or Tumblr

TESIV: Oblivion - Vanilla

The Foundling ~ 700. Comic Script. Rhiannon's origin story. Read on AO3 or Tumblr

Abecean Blue ~ 514. Martin extols the virtues of the Abecean Sea; After his death, Rhiannon goes for a dip. Read on AO3 or Tumblr

Rowan Hunts ~ 1,803. Jauffre has gone missing; Rowan hunts him down and brings him back Read on AO3 or Tumblr

A Restless Pillow (Begets No Rest) ~ 1,650. Rowan is an insomniac due to too many people pestering xir in sleep. Read on AO3 or Tumblr

Bring the Fire; Brave the Cold ~680. On a snowy day at Cloud Ruler, Rowan discusses the theory of magical fire. Read on AO3 or Tumblr

No Knight in Shining Armour, Xe ~ 4,780. What happens to Rowan between the end of the MQ and Accepting an Invitation. Read on AO3 or Tumblr

Per Necessitatem ~ 1,940. A description of Rowan performing the Dark Brotherhood's Purification Quest. Read on AO3 or Tumblr

[phantoms-lair]

Ahhh I'm extremely indecisive!!!

...

Okay lucky 74 go

(so this is going to take place before Steve found Bucky)

Steve didn't know what to think about the fact that he had living family in this time. He'd had no children himself, nor brothers and sisters. But he'd had a cousin out west who had a kid, who had a couple of kids, who had a couple more.

Family. And of course it was on his father's side, which he didn't want to think about. But he felt so alone in this day and age, so desperate for a connection.

But he was afraid. Not of the violence Joseph Rogers was capable of, he was more than a match for that. But...would he be Steve to them, or Captain America? Would they see him as a person or use him to prop up their family like the government had tried to use him as a propaganda piece.

So here he is in a suburb in the middle of nowhere, with what he's told is a nice but not too formal outfit, and a bottle of sparkling cider and a pie.

"You must Steve." A woman with grey in her hair opened the door. Come on in. I hope you brought an appetite."

"Always," He admitted. "I have a bit of an appetite."

His relatives shared a smile to themselves. before ushering him in.

"Norville and Scooby are running a bit late, I'm afraid. They were supposed to be helping Ruby with her puppies, but he and his friends always seem to get caught up in things." Scooby? The background information he was given mention the older child, but who was Scooby?

"So I heard you were planning on going to art school? Are you still thinking of going?"

Huh, admittedly his interest in art wasn't something he'd thought would get passed down. "Honestly I'm just trying to get my feet under me right now. No long term plans."

He could go back to art school. That had never occurred to him

"Like, sorry we're late." Norville skidded into the room with a large great dane on his heels. "Scoob and I were helping Ruby and-"

"You and your friends got caught up in another mess." His father's tone was fond, but exasperated.

"Every time." Norville groaned.

"Steve, this is our son Norville. Norville, this is your cousin Steve."

"Just call me Shaggy, Dad. No one calls me Norville."

Steve made a choking sound.

"Sorry, I spent the last few years in Europe. It, um, means something different there."

"Well that's in Europe." Shaggy said, with a determination on his face that said he was NOT going to be called by his given name.

Good for him.

"RI'm Scooby Doo."

And the dog talked. That was..a thing, but he'd seen weirder.

And none of them had made any mention of him being Captain America at all. Maybe this would turn out better than he thought.

[iwantthemtostay]

I would like any and all morsels in the "Yeah. Yes." Scene from the royalty au

Thank you!! (I'm so relieved other people are also into "Yeah. Yes." because I was worried people might think it was a copout lol)

I'm pretty sure the idea of them sitting on a couch, Lexi bringing up the what if and him saying they couldn't but then 'yeah. yes.' and holding her hand is the reason I wrote this fic, lol. It would not let me go. Originally it was going to be inside, but then the rooftop garden came to me, and I think the visual for the original inside idea may have been slightly inspired by this Dan/Blair Gossip Girl scene which I only realised on seeing a gif of it recently.

To start with Fez coming up on the roof, he *is* a bit annoyed, but only because he's worried about Lexi as it's very unlike her not to be considerate and tell him what she's doing and then she apologises for that straight away and he has this rush of fondness for how caring she is to everyone.

Lexi remembering him sitting on the rooftop of his grandma's store has the same effect on him as him remembering she only wants her grandma's ring if she's really in love, they're both storing up every piece of information they learn about each other like little treasures not realising the other is doing the same

"Ion have so much, uh, bare skin." In the beginning of the fic Fez doesn't use slang around Lexi, he's very careful to speak like what he thinks a royal bodyguard should but as he grows more comfortable around her he starts slipping into it, especially when he is distracted by the fact he's talking about her bare skin (he's more attracted to Lexi in her Lexi clothes but this princess outfit really did it for him)

the stars feeling far away - constant, beautiful, eternal - who doesn't love a star motif? Lexi's ideal love feels far away and out of her grasp despite the fact he's right there

Lexi spilling the champagne was an excuse to get the glove off. I did play around with the idea of them holding hands with her glove on which I think would have maybe added to the forbidden feeling but @idontneedtobeforgiven was like 'they have to hold hands skin on skin' and this way it's more like the scene in the Age Of Innocence film (which I admittedly have not watched in full, I just loved the book and Edith Wharton felt perfect for Lexi's academic interest with all the themes of self-determination and fitting into a rigid way of upper class life)

she must sound like a poor little rich girl. I think Lexi really hates the idea of complaining about her life because she knows she has an insane amount of privilege but... yes she is living in the lap of luxury but it is not making her happy and she's putting a lot of pressure on herself. I think the relationship with Fez is a big source of support for her because he is around so much and is very much not interested in her as a princess or putting extra requests on her

What Cassie said earlier about Lexi liking being a perfect princess is in some ways true because she does want to do this right, but she's also a bit annoyed that she's always the perfectly behaved one so she has her moment where she almost pretends to be drunk so she can say what she wants to say

“Lexi.” It’s something like a plea, something almost pained. He does look away now. “We can’t…” While Lexi has acknowledged she's attracted to Fez to herself I don't think Fez has let himself think about it that way because this is his job and he can't risk a distraction that could put Lexi in danger. But when she asks him and asks him to imagine a different world of course he would? And he can't manage any more than "Yeah. Yes." because that would be to give away too much but the firmness of the Yes as opposed to just a Yeah which is sort of dreamy and tentative is very deliberate as he needs her to know that he would be interested in being with her in a world where he could be. The leaving his hand for her to hold is sort of to back this up and as a reassurance, but he doesn't want to take that step for her

A firework goes off in the distance and Fez stays and holds her hand. They've had their own metaphorical firework, and him staying is significant after her little Peyton Sawyer moment and also because he has had a lot of people leave and Lexi's own decisions to stay or leave are going to be a big part of the fic

fanfic writers: director's cut

[elenothar]

Hello hello! 11, 34 and 35 for the fic writer questions!

Hello! *waves*

... you really don't ask the easy questions, do you XD

11. Who or what do you find yourself writing about most?

In every fandom I inevitably glomp onto one character specifically, and that's who any fic I write will be about (there can be other characters, sure, but that one favourite always needs to be in there). At the moment that's mostly Shen Wei for Guardian, which I'm sure you all have already deduced ;)

As for the what... I don't think I've got that one thing I always write about, but quite often I'll have some sort of language thing in fic, even if it's just a minor point. Also couch cuddling.

34. Copy and paste an excerpt you’re particularly fond of.

Oh dear, oh dear, what to choose... From Intelligible:

“The place where I woke up is near here,” he says and only barely keeps himself from wincing. So they’re back to this: a truth, but not the whole truth.

Zhao Yunlan’s attention was already sharp, but now it cuts like a knife, peeling Shen Wei back layer by layer, so very gently that there isn’t any pain to distract from the terrible openness.

“You think this tree is there?”

Zhao Yunlan has always had a beautifully quick mind.

Shen Wei makes himself nod.

A breath hisses out between Zhao Yunlan’s teeth, but his touch is gentle when he taps lightly on Shen Wei’s jaw.

“Look at me?”

Shen Wei has never learned how to tell Zhao Yunlan no and have it stick, too weak for his smiles, his wheedling, his occasional devastating, vulnerable honesty. Too much of him still yearns to be the less burdened man Zhao Yunlan had once enchanted ten thousand years ago, who’d wanted to please Kunlun so badly and given so much of himself that Shen Wei is still finding pieces lovingly cradled in Zhao Yunlan’s hands millennia later.

35. Ramble about any fic-related thing you want!

Hmm, I suppose at the moment I'm thinking a lot about worldbuilding. Most of the canons I find myself drawn to are the kind of fantasy/scifi setting where there's a lot of room to play with concepts, from language to history to music to biology. (Not to mention that most canons are... holey when it comes to worldbuilding; admittedly, that's partly because a fully realised world would take hugely long to show and they want to have Actual Plot.) Guardian is a great example of this - they've got some interesting stuff going on re: Dixing, Haixing, Dixingren, Hallows etc but fundamentally we actually know very little and can only extrapolate from the (sometimes contradictory) crumbs of information canon deigns to give us. So much room to invent random cool shit!

More questions here

[tsarisfanfiction]

3. 14. J. U. 🙃

Sorry this is a bit late, rl slammed me kinda hard last weekend...

I'll admit I'm guessing which numbered ones you're referencing because there were two numbered lists on the same day, oops, but as one of them needed a specific fic referenced I'm hoping I've got the right list!

3) Is there a trope you wouldn’t touch with a ten foot pole?

Hmm... there are a few tropes around that I'm less fond of - ABO springs to mind immediately, as well as coffee shop AUs - but honestly I am a big fan of deconstructing and twisting tropes so if given the incentive and requisite curiosity of "I wonder how this would go if..." I don't think there's any trope that I would say I'd never write (I once said I'd never write a genderbend, then one happened, so...) I'm less likely to write most romance-based tropes, though, mostly because romance isn't something I generally enjoy writing quite so much.

14) What’s the worst writing advice you’ve ever come across?

Oof, that's a hard one. There's quite a few I ignore for one reason or another, mostly because I've reached the point where I write how I write and throwing something different into the equation is just gonna mess me up, but I wouldn't necessarily say they're bad because what works (or not) for me doesn't mean it doesn't (or does) work for someone else. We're all unique people, our minds work in unique ways, and different tips and tricks therefore work on all of us.

One that has screwed me over a few times though is "write at least x words a day". "x" varies, but for me I find that if I can't write that day, trying to force it just makes me hate everything, and then I feel guilty for not writing anything at all and it can take me a while to kick myself out of that and remind myself it's supposed to be a hobby. It's not a requirement, or a chore. This isn't school, or a job. This is something I do in my free time and I shouldn't force it.

J:  What’s your favourite fanfic trope?  Have you written it?

Back in the trope questions again, I see. I should admit that I'm actually bad at these because I can never actually identify "tropes" on demand, if that makes sense. I know a few core ones, but for the most part it's more "what sort of thing do I like?" and yes, I definitely write what I like! Caretaker needing to be taken care of is top of the list, probably, and anyone who reads my stuff will be very familiar with that creeping in!

That being said, if I had to pick a trope I haven't yet written but would like to experiment with one day... Soulmark AUs. They fascinate me, although (like Hanahaki Disease, another one I love to read) there's a prevalence of it being romantic soulmates in almost all the fics I've read, and I have a definite preference for platonic soulmates. But then again, I managed to write a familial Hanahaki, so maybe one day I'll manage to write a soulmark AU that fits both the trope and my own desire for more platonic/familial love fics taking centre stage.

U: Is there a pairing you would like to write, but haven’t tried yet.

Eh, if I'm honest I'm less fussed about writing ships and more platonic pairings, or ones that could fall either way (see: CaeJose from JJBA, which is a fandom I have yet to write for at all). And when we look at platonic relationships, oh there's so many I'd love to dabble in at some point.

That being said, I have just remembered one bizarre One Piece kinda crackship I came up with a few years ago and thought that I might write it but so far haven't... (it was gonna be a Wano arc AU and I thought it up before Wano happened... we're now the other side and needless to say "AU" doesn't even start to cover it ahaha)

Oh, and how could I forget Kaito/Aoko from Detective Conan/Magic Kaito. Admittedly I have something half-baked sat in my drafts so technically I have written something for them, but I've not finished anything worth posting for them. Then again, I've also yet to write any Shinichi/Ran or Heiji/Kazuha, either.

40 Questions — Meme for Fic Writers

Fanfic Writer Ask Meme

[tuffdwightwest]

You Are My Best Friend Chapter 5

When they arrived back into the hall. Astrid and Heather had also returned and Tuffnut had quickly joined in telling stories that got most of everyone laughing. Snotlout stood away though still distracted and thinking over his feelings from earlier. Not just earlier but in general.

Even in their teen years growing up on the Edge. He had always been... fond of him. Perhaps even more then Ruffnut. Even flirting with Ruff he had always found Tuffs reactions kind of amusing. Plus the rivalry with Fishlegs had been fun. He thought about the other night though. Where Tuff said he didn't love Ruff. It was true... he didn't love Ruffnut. At least not like that.

But did that mean he loved Tuffnut? How long had he been harboring feelings for him?

"You seem distracted." Dagurs voice suddenly called. Jerking Snotlout out of his thoughts as he looked over at the Beserker king. Dagur was actually looking at him in a bit of concern but everyone else seemed to still be distracted with their own things. Which came at kind of a relief.

"Its nothing." Snotlout mumbled gaze immediately going back to Tuff which did not go unnoticed by Dagur.

"Oh, I know that look." Dagur stated.

"What? What look there was no look." Snotlout said hurriedly.

Dagur just hummed looking over at Tuff who was currently laughing whole heartedly. "He's not a bad choice honestly. Think he would be interested too. He gives off that... vibe." Dagur said.

"What vibe?" Snotlout questioned.

Before Dagur could answer though Hiccup called everyones attention. Dagur just squeezing Snotlouts shoulder before walking over to Hiccup as he thanked the Beserkers for their visit. Snotlout however found he had enough of socializing.

At least sober and seeing some mead next to him he didn't even care that it burned as he started to down it. Ignoring everything as he just focused on the hopefully blissful feelings it would give.

---------------------

Night fall was finally upon them as the night of partying started to come to a close. The mead had helped and the few others Snotlout drank afterwards. Meaning that he was plenty drunk throughout most of it. At one point he had stumbled outside to go piss when as he was returning he recognized Tuffnut. Sitting outside and just staring up at the moon. A troubled look on his face.

Against better judgement Snotlout stumbled towards the other. Practically falling into him. Not missing how it caused the other to jump but Tuff caught him anyway. "Whoa you're a few bottles down aren't you?" Tuff questioned. Helping steady Snotlout as Snotlout just sat down. Leaning against the twin as it just felt right.

"Yeah." He breathed out before breaking into a giggle. "Every'hing so swimmy." He mused. Tuff just gave him a small smile before looking back out at the entirety of Berk.

"I imagine." He flinched as he heard what sounded like a brawl start in the mess hall. Something that Snotlout caught and without filter immediately called him on.

"Y' so jumpy. What y' scared?" He teased.

Tuffnut just met his gaze for a moment before looking back inside. "I don't like it when people are drunk. It just... reminds me of bad things." He said cryptically holding onto his arms. "I honestly don't even like being drunk myself. I get too serious." He explained with an awkward laugh.

Snotlout just frowned. The energy felt different in this conversation. But he also felt like he couldn't keep up. His brain foggy and unable to focus. "Th'nk its funny." He just said instead.

Tuff just gave a small smile at that before getting to his feet. Holding out his hand and grabbing onto Snotlouts to lift him up. Snotlout gladly accepted the others hands leaning into him as he grinned. "I think you've had too much. You're practically on top of me." Tuff teased.

Snotlout though suddenly leaned all his weight on top of Tuff. Causing them both to fall. Snotlout standing over Tuff with a flirty grin. "Well I love being on top of you~" He teased. Looking down at the other.

Tuff still had an awkward smile on his face but as Snotlouts hand went to rest on Tuffs chest. He found his heart beating extremely fast. His whole body tensed. Neither of them moved at first, as if neither knew what to say. Without thinking though Snotlout suddenly leaned down pulling the other into a soft kiss.

Surprised by how soft the other was. Snotlout let out a happy moan as he attempted to deepen the kiss only to suddenly find him pushed away. Chastised he looked down at Tuff surprised to find tears in his eyes. Immediately concerned he cupped the others face for a moment. "Tuffy?" He questioned.

Tuff looked up at him as he said his name. "So you are aware it's me?" He asked a bit detached. Snotlout nodded not sure why Tuff asked that.

"Then why did y-" Tuff went to start again when Snotlout again just leaned down and kissed him. This time though he was pushed away much quicker and a whine escaped him.

"Stop it!" Tuff cried out. Kicking out from under Snotlout and getting up away from him. Immediately Snotlout grabbed his wrist though causing him to whip around and glare at the other. Snotlout just looked sad and confused though and perhaps that caused Tuff to soften even as he looked a bit wary.

"You're drunk Snotty. Maybe, I should take you back to your hut." He offered.

"Oh what we doin' there." Snotlout asked hopefully. Tuff laughed at that before reaching out and pulling the other to his feet. Being quick to stop him from leaning to completely on him.

"You are going to sleep and I'm probally going to go for a walk to forget this happened." Tuff admitted.

"Do y'u not like me? I really like y'. I thin' I want to be with y'. That always wanted t' be with y'." Snotlout admitted ruining it by again pushing past the little barrier Tuff made for himself. As he crushed the other against the stone. Rubbing against him with his obvious excitement.

Tuff for his self blushed but mostly just looked alarmed at the attention. "Get off." Tuffnut warned.

"Please. You are so soft and wa-" Snotlout didn't get to finish that sentence as suddenly Tuff reached out and decked the other hard. Enough to knock him out. Breathing heavily the twin looked down at the other. Not exactly meaning to knock him out but panicking due to the situation.

Bending down he pulled the other against his lap making sure he didn't badly injure him before sighing. "Maybe if you weren't blackout drunk I would have took you up on the offer." He admitted softly. Which was honestly part of the reason why he was resisting. Well that and he just despised drunk people. They were rude, pushy, got in your personal space and... reminded Tuff of him.

He wasn't the strongest and it would take a lot to drag Snotlout back to his hut. So getting up he found a wheelbarrel before bringing it over to Snotlout and lifting the other in. Wincing as he saw the bruise starting to form. Making sure he was secure though he just started to walk down the hill lost in his own thoughts.

So Snotlout for sure liked him. He wasn't so sure after the flight with Hookfang but this had proved it. Tuff though didn't know how he felt. Admittedly, he had had a crush on Snotlout. But it had started to fade after he kept not showing any interest. Even going after his sister which honestly had made Tuff quite jealous. So his old feelings about the boy had kind of faded. But after tonight and even a few nights ago. It seemed they were starting to return.

As they made it to his hut. He didn't see any of his family around which was kind of a relief. Spitelout wasn't the nicest man. Especially to Tuffnut. Having made his spite of the twin quite known. He had made it all the way to Snotlouts bed and resting the other on it. He tucked him in gently before smoothing back his hair.

Taking his helmet and setting it aside for him. Spotting a stuffie nearby he also grabbed that before handing it to Snotlout. Watching as he suddenly snuggled into it. Which was a good sign. Seemed he went straight from knocked out to asleep. He was viking, a drunk viking, Tuff expected nothing else. Hesitating for a moment after standing up he leaned down and kissed the other on the forehead. "We need to talk when you are clear enough to remember." He mumbled. Turning to leave only to spot Snotlouts mother watching him.

Eyes widening the two met gazes before Tuff muttered an apology and quickly left the others room. Moving quickly through the house and practically breaking into a run after he escaped the doorway. Once a good mile away from the house. He slowed down before sighing. Feeling tears threatening to fall again. Now that he was alone though he figured he didn't mind.

And collapsing the twin just let his emotions go.

Commissioned Piece by YumiKazahaya

[braindeadskeletons]

Speaking of music, I really like to sing, and I think I'm actually pretty good at it. I don't open up very easily at all, so if I'm honest with you I really trust you. And I've been described as the friend everyone comes to for comfort/advice, and I take that role with pride. In public, I can be very affectionate, or not affectionate at all. It really depends on what my S/O would like. But when we're home, I'm usually pretty clingy. (I hope thiat wasn't too much, or too little, info!) (2/2)

okay so I did a huge whoops and deleted the first half of this ask. Here's the first part of it:

Hi, I'm here for a matchup! (Sorry in advance if I do a lot of asks to fit in all my info). My name is Viper, I am Genderfluid, Pansexual, and Polyamorus. I am an ambivert, who normally doesn't leave my house unless asked, but once I do my inner extrovert comes out. But I can only take so much, and after a couple of hours I'll need some alone time to relax. I like to read adventure/sci-fi/horror books when I get the chance. I also am an amateur artist, who listens to music 24/7. (1/?)

Hello there! Don't worry about it at all the more information on you the merrier. Reading this you honestly sound like such an awesome person to be around with and just hangout. Like I could just say something that's been on my mind for a really long time and it's pretty heavy but you completely just listen and understand. You're just someone everybody gets along with you know? Immediately when I read everything two boys came to mind instantly and though they may be the most basic answers I'd say I got the match pretty accurate. Or at least I'd like to think so lol. Thank you so much for sending this in!

I match you with Horrortale!Sans and Undertale!Sans

Alright so immediately off the bat you may be thinking 'how the fuck did I get here?' and honestly that's a valid question. You don't exactly see the two and think that they're best friends who could both share a very cute human. Axe reflects Sans in such a way that really disturbs him. If the human just made one different decision Sans would've been left in the underground to starve with every other monster. He also isn't very fond of how Crooks appears and it kind of haunts him that in another timeline he failed Paps. Axe on the other hand isn't fond of Sans because he feels like he always acts high and mighty. He doesn't like how Sans can sit around and act like Axe is some sort of freak when Sans isn't even a completely innocent monster himself. He just acts like a lazy idiot but he isn't. It also doesn't help that whenever Axe looks at Sans he's just reminded of how his Frisk wronged him. He's reminded that he isn't the monster he used to be because of the head injury he endured and the hardships underground. As mentioned before, one wrong move and at the end of the day Sans and Axe are one of the same. They both reflect the parts of each other that they would rather live without confronting.

There's immediately a lot to unpack here from the start. Getting the two to even begin to compromise on a poly relationship with you is admittedly going to be a challenge. It would require you to be able to firmly hold your ground and get them to sort their shit out. It's a lot of conversation and trust needed in order for this to work out. In the end, they both come to the compromise after a lot of discussion and setting boundaries of what is and isn't alright with them. Sometimes they might clash a bit and have those issues resurface (its very rare since both skeletons when needed are amazing at concealing their emotions) and you'll need to act as the middleman. At the end of the day it's all worth it to them just to see you happy.

Let's start off first with Sans. It's amazing how I've gone on for a bit and I haven't even technically started. The fact that you don't really like going out of your way to go out unless asked to is a bit of a relief. It's not that Sans doesn't like socializing, it's just that a lot of the time he really needs a break to just relax on the couch and nap with you, you know? He's got a lot on his mind and Papyrus often scolds him for sleeping and with Grillby's it can at times be overwhelming when he just needs peace and quiet. Just knowing that his cute datemate isn't going to do any of that helps him relax. It's going to be a lot of just enjoying each other's company even if it's quiet at the start. The silence between you two isn't ever uncomfortable though, just enjoying your company is enough for him. Of course there will actually be times where he does offer you to go to Grillby's and when you say yes he's always really happy to share his favorite bar with you. When you two sit together at his usual spot it's a lot of him joking around with you and absolutely looking at you with heart eyes when he gets a certain genuine laugh out of you. He's actually teased about it a lot the few times you don't accept his offer to go to Grillby's. Sans lives to see you smile with his jokes and he just tells them that they're jealous he ended up with such a cute datemate and they didn't. If you ever find yourself exhausted and you need to go home after you're bone tired just tell him and he'll teleport you right home no hassle.

Once you reach a certain point in your relationship Sans will start to gradually accept your affection. You'll need to ease him into it, since he's really not used to anybody besides his brother showing him any sort of affection. Of course before this he's absolutely bombarding you with flirty puns numerous times but physical affection? That's going to take a while. However once he's used to it you can absolutely smother him all you want. He'll only get embarrassed if it's in a public place like Grillbys but he's good at hiding it for the most part. In front of people like his brother he'll still be a little unsure but for the most part it's like a running joke where Pap yells at him to knock it off and Sans pushes his buttons a little. It often goes a little like this:

Papyrus: SANS! I DEMAND THAT YOU UNHAND THE HUMAN THIS INSTANT!

Sans, a hand on your waist: what human?

Papyrus: THE ONE IN YOUR POSSESSION

Sans, pulling you closer: this human?

Papyrus: SANS

Sans: this one right here?

Papyrus: SANS STOP

Sans, moving his hands a little lower:

Papyrus: SANS PLEASE WE'RE SURROUNDED BY CHILDREN THIS IS A HUMAN CHILD'S 5TH BIRTHDAY CELEBRATION

It's all in good fun and he never goes further than that. The one place he'll draw the line is if you get a little too sexual for him in public. Especially if his brother is right there. He prefers to keep that stuff just between you and him.

Okay now onto Axe! Unlike Sans, Axe would rather stay inside for the rest of his life than go outside. His appearance discourages him from wanting to do so. If you're with him this mentality will probably be projected onto you as well. He won't really ask you to go out anywhere (unless it's somewhere he specifically knows will make you happy) so in terms of that don't expect much from him. Axe is really happy that you don't really like going out either way and you'd rather spend time with him inside the house where it's safe, warm, and he can keep an eye out for you. It's comforting to him that he can know where you are and that you're happy with him. His favorite moments with you are when you've got your head in a book and he sees your face relax as you get lost in your own little world. It's just the cutest thing. Axe absolutely adores the fact that you're clingy because unlike his counterpart (assuming that at this point he obviously trusts you) it doesn't take time for him at all to want to cuddle you, hold you in his arms, kiss you, etc. He's shy about none of it. The only thing you'd really need to look out for is when you try and initiate affection yourself. It's not that it's unwelcomed; he just doesn't take surprises well due to the nature of his underground. Make sure that you let him know what's coming and you'll both be perfectly fine. During the few times that you two are in public together he's not shy about showing the world that you're his. The only time where he might ask you to step back a little is when you're with his brother. He doesn't like Crooks seeing stuff like this because he still has an instinct to protect him from things. Not that you'd ever try anything of course.

An aspect about you that both skeletons greatly appreciate is how you're very honest with the people that you love and that you act as the friend who listens. They've both found themselves in the same position as you and now that you're dating both of them it's a wonderful change of pace. You all can sit down and vent to each other instead of only listening to others rant and you all absolutely trust each other. Honesty and integrity are both traits the skeletons really look for in a datemate. There's basically no secrets between the three of you and for your skeleton boys thats definitely new for them. As for your talent with singing and art? They genuinely can't get enough of either. Whenever you draw something? Sans will literally stare and wonder how he ended up with someone as talented as you meanwhile Axe has already grabbed the drawing and put it on the fridge. If you ever try and talk yourself down both of them are immediately on your case about how you shouldn't put yourself down and that everything you make is a masterpiece. Axe will literally also ask you who the fuck made you think like that and where do they live. He isn't joking. Sans won't be as vocal about it as Axe is but he's listening in as well. With your singing they both love your voice to pieces. Sans will hype you up to every single person at Grillby's and even encourage you to let others hear your talent. If not, that's cool too. He can just sit and listen at home. Axe mostly likes to ask for you to sing to him when he's having a really rough day or when it's late at night and you're both alone. What can he say? It helps him sleep.

[ranposlittle]

Hii I'm a big fan of your writing(●♡∀♡)!!!! May I request a scenario with Kunikida which broke up with his S/O, and then he regrets about it plus his S/O hurt sm? Hope this won't bother you and thankss🤍🤍

Genre: SFW, Angst

Tags: Break up, I used the F-word once im sorry ;w;

A/N: Thank you for appreciating my writing, you anonymous bunny~ thank you for requesting this, too. I enjoyed writing this! Please listen to THIS SONG for maximum angst (stan day6) and I hope this will make you hurt inside, in a good way hehe enjoooy~ ٩(๑>◡<๑)۶

˚ * . ⊹ • ꒰꒱ • ⊹. * ˚

The office chair creaked beneath Kunikida's weight as he stretched his arms up after doing the day's work. His back feels heavy and his muscles sore from doing nothing but sitting and typing this week's report.

Putting his attention back to his computer and the afternoon sun reflecting on the screen, Kunikida squinted to check the time; he still have thirty minutes. While everybody else was rustling about and getting ready to head home, Kunikida decided to check his files and clean up some space on his drive. While doing so, he realized that he can't remember the last time he tidied up his files and quickly scolded himself for being so unorganized. With slender fingers, he clicked on every folders within folders, rummaging its contents and hitting the small button on his keyboard to delete the old items. With each unneeded gunk out of his system, he felt lighter as if his stress was being relieved along with his computer's storage.

Kunikida's eyes never left the screen even if his favorite eye-sore asked him if he's planning to sleep on his desk because he's too afraid to be late for tomorrow, in which he just replied with a deadpanned answer and demanded the man to leave him alone before he hangs him using the very same bandages covering the man's body.

Left in serene silence now, he was able to focus more on his work and in no time, he was almost done with it. The click of the mouse echoed in the empty office as Kunikida went on the folder for videos. He doesn't even know why he bothered since he knows for sure that he doesn't keep such things on his work computer but there it is; a file with a name composed of series of random numbers and letters stared at him from the opposite side of the screen. Kunikida's mind raced as to what the video might be and how it ended up on his computer in the first place. The pointer slowly made its way to the file, he clicked on it twice and the screen turned dark as the video player loaded its contents.

The ocean. The strong blows of wind muffled the sounds of the waves crashing into the shore and the birds cawing around. The camera panned throughout the entire beach, catching some people playing about under the hot sun. Kunikida's memory has started to piece together the beautiful scenery when suddenly, a voice in the video called out his name. The camera quickly turned to the source of the voice and when the lenses focused, his heart stopped. It's you. It's been so long since he has seen your face but yet, you still manage to steal his breath away with just your silhouette.

You waved cheerfully at the camera and he heard himself chuckle lowly. A bright smile plastered across your face as another wave rippled on your sandy feet. It's your first vacation. He remembered it now. He purchased the camera especially for this occasion.

"Aren't you going to swim?" You shouted at him, your face crinkled from the sun's harsh beam underneath your straw hat.

"Maybe later," his own voice boomed in reply. "It's still too hot, you'll get sunburned. Come sit here with me for a moment."

You ran towards him and the shade of the beach umbrella he was under. The sound of your giggles rang on the speakers of his monitor and clenched up on his chest. Your face moved closer to the camera and got out of frame, followed by a snappy sound. A kiss, he reckoned. He can actually almost feel the warmth of your lips as it closed in on his like you always do before and a jolt of pain stabbed in his chest. He wanted to look away, to pause the video and just delete it, but his fingers are frozen in place and his eyes are locked in on the scene in front of him as you moved back into frame with that sweet smile of yours that he fell for.

Kunikida kept on watching as the scene cut off to a view of the sunset. The sound shuffled as he flipped the camera to get the two of you in frame as you shared a kiss. In spite of the pain in his chest, he smiled as he recalled the memory of you.

He remembered how happy the both of you were this time. Even though Kunikida dreaded missing a day of work, he remembered being nothing but excited as he waited for the day of your vacation to come. He remembered how much his heart raced whenever he would see you, his mind clouded with the thought of wanting to be with you every second of the day. He remembered how much you loved him, how you would always whisper those sweet words to him in the most unexpected times, disturbing the butterflies in his stomach. He remembered all the times where he'll get out of the comforting warmth of the bed when you share a night together as he starts a new day. How you, despite being barely out of your dream state, would always wake up before he heads to the door to remind him once more of your love for him and wishes him to enjoy the day ahead. He remembered how those words being the only thing that got him through the day alright no matter what challenge he has to face. He felt like an idiot. An idiot for not saying those words back enough, for not appreciating how good you were to him, for breaking your heart.

Kunikida smashed the space bar, pausing the video to the image of the two of you embracing. His fists balled up as the ache in his heart grew and droplets of tears trickled down his cheeks. Kunikida cursed quietly, wiping the unwanted tears away and looked up to his screen once again. Why? Why is he hurting this way? He's the one who broke up with you. So, why?

He remember that time, too. He entered the room with a heavy heart but he has made up his mind about it. He's been thinking about breaking it up to you for weeks now and he figured that it's time to just face the fact that he's no longer in love with you. He remembered the look on your face when you've processed his words. The tears, the pleading, the quiet sobs– he remember it all.

"Stay," you repeatedly asked him as if you're praying to a deity for a miracle. But he didn't hear you. His foot stepped in front of the other without hesitation as he walked out of your room and your life. Admittedly, he was hurting back then, too. He did had some nights of crying himself to sleep but he knew that it's what was needed to be done.

Kunikida exited the video, shut down his computer and stood up from his chair. It's just a memory, he thought to himself, just an old memory romanticized by nostalgia. He'll get over it once he occupied himself with other important things, he convinced himself.

But by the next few days, he's still thinking about you. He's distracted everyday as the prickling pain on his chest never left him, no matter how much he drowns himself in his work. He was feeling more frustrated everyday as his mind nagged him to see you, to talk to you. He knew it'll probably make things worse but he couldn't think of any other way to settle his feelings. So, here he is, on the corner of Cafe Uzumaki, away from prying eyes and invasive ears. His cellphone on one shaky hand as he hesitantly call you. His thumb moved swiftly across the number pad, his muscles remembering the pattern with all the times he dialed the same set of numbers to hear your voice on the other line. Kunikida gulped thickly as he once again argued with his own logic. He clicked his tongue in defeat and pressed the call button.

He heard the first ring. Then, the second. You usually pick up around the fifth ring so he waited. Third ring. Does he really want to—

"Hello?"

Kunikida's heart beat painfully loud on his chest and his mind panicked upon hearing the familiarity of your voice. His hand shook harder and his throat tightened up as he felt so nervous, he could throw up.

"Hello? Who is this?" You asked once again.

With a couple puffs of shallow breath, Kunikida raised his phone up to his ear and forced his own voice out of his dry throat.

"H-Hi," he said timidly. "It's me. It's... Kunikida."

Footfall echoes as people come and go in Cafe Uzumaki, Kunikida's slim finger rubbed at the porcelain handle of his cup. His coffee has gone cold and his thoughts are too occupied with things to say and imaginary scenarios of how this meeting will go to demand for a refill. He was in the middle of another imaginary conversation with you when a voice softly called out his name.

"Kunikida-kun?" It sounded too real to just be in his head this time.

He caught a glimpse of someone standing in front of him through his peripheral and his emerald eyes slowly lifted up from your frame, stopping at the sight of your smiling face. You're beautiful. You always have been. He keep trying to forget but you're just as beautiful as the day he first loved you.

When he didn't said anything and just stared at you, you took it upon yourself to sit yourself down across from him on the booth. A kimono-clad lady came by shortly, asking for your order. Mocha latte, you said politely. A drink you've always been fond of, just like before, Kunikida thought.

"So," you said coldly, breaking off the silence, "are you just going to stare at me or what?"

His face contorted into a mixture of shock and a concerned frown. Of course you're still angry at him, what was he even expecting? That you'll just run towards him and wrap him in a tight embrace like he didn't shattered your trust and crushed your heart?

Then all of a sudden, you brightly laughed at him. "I was just kidding, Kunikida-kun. You're always so easy to tease."

He stuttered in surprise, weren't you mad at him? Through his disbelief, Kunikida's face soften as he continue to stare at your giggling form. A small smile made its way to his lips as he feel warm inside. He have always had a weak spot for your smile and laughter. Just seeing you happy like this made him forget that things are different now.

"It's been, what," you mused after calming down from your jesting, "two years since we've seen each other? I feel so old now."

The waitress came back with your order in hand and you bowed politely in gratitude. You mirrored Kunikida's earlier actions as you fiddled with the handle of your cup, took a few sips of your drink and waited for him to return the conversation.

"I'm sorry for making you come here. I just, uh, I saw our old video. Our first vacation. Do you remember that?" Kunikida finally said, eyes falling back down on his cold coffee. It's been so long since he has to say his feelings out loud, it feels suffocating and liberating at the same time.

"It was on my computer. I don't even remember how it got there but," he continued, not really waiting for your answer as he unravel his thoughts. "I just can't stop thinking about you since then. About us."

A gloomy cloud descended on your booth as you realized Kunikida's sentiment. The atmosphere around you began to feel heavy, nostalgic and sad. You said nothing but your heart ached inside your ribcages as flashes of memories– the good and the bad– played in your head like a movie.

"I think I made a mistake, (Y/N)." Kunikida said in almost a whisper, "I made a mistake."

"Kunikida-kun, I—"

"I want you back, (Y/N). I want us back. We were happy, you know? We were so happy together and we had it all. You loved me more than anyone ever did and I— I threw it all away. I don't even know why I just had to fuck it all up." Kunikida groaned and buried his face on one hand as he tried to conceal the tears that his eyes can't hold back anymore. He cursed under his breath as he failed to compose himself despite feeling like an absolute fool for crying in front of you like this. But he just can't stop. His chest felt like it's going to burst from all the emotions he was repressing. He just can't stop his heart from hurting, no matter what his logical brain is telling him.

You let him crumble down in front of you. To say that you were heartbroken when he left you is an understatement but you never harbored any ill will towards Kunikida. You took no pleasure in hearing his regretful words and watching him hurt like this. You knew that the both of you are just victims of the circumstances; victims of fate and wrong timings. Neither one of you is at fault. It just wasn't meant to be.

"Listen, Kunikida-kun," you took his free hand and held it firmly on both of yours. "You are one of the greatest things that has ever happened to me. You are one of the greatest men I've ever met. You're right, we were so happy back then and sometimes, I still wonder if I can ever have that again."

Kunikida looked up at you, the tightness in his chest still making it hard for him to breath. His eyes are swollen and the tears still wouldn't stop from dropping down his face but the feeling of your hand on his is such a comforting feeling. For a brief moment, he remembered how you used to hold him like this when he's upset, your loving voice calming him down from any nightmares and just you staying by his side until he was alright is his remedy for any traumatic experience he obtained from saving lives. How amazing it is that you still have that effect on him after all this time.

"But what happened to us also taught me a great lesson about life, and love, and about myself. I could say that I'm a better person now because of that experience. I regret nothing, Kunikida-kun. I don't want you to, as well. Don't think of me and feel regrets about the what-if and the what-could've-been. I want you to feel happy. Be happy that it happened," you continued and Kunikida's eyes flickered as more tears came down. "We got to experience something that other people would spend their whole lives seeking. We got to share something so special that we will carry it with us through the rest of our lives. I'm glad, you know. I'm just really glad that I get to do that with you. I'm glad that it was you, Kunikida-kun."

Your voice broke off as you say his name, tears of unknown reason started to run down your face as well in spite of the kind smile you have. Kunikida's eyes widen for a second, understanding what your wise words mean. It means he's not getting you back. It means his chance had passed and no matter what he does, he knows that things will just stay the way they are. No amount of apology or regret will bring you both back at the time where your love for each other is as bright as the sun that was shining on that one vacation day.

His jaw clenched as another stabbing pain jolted on his chest. "I understand," he said and managing to muster a smile. "I understand," he repeated although it was more to himself this time.

"Thank you for calling me," you said, rubbing your thumbs against his skin. "I'm really happy to see you again. I'm glad we got to talk."

"Yeah. Me too," Kunikida gave you a half-hearted smile. He wanted to say more but there's nothing he can say to change what's already on your mind. He just have to accept it. If there's anything that he can do for you right now, it's to let you be happy even if that doesn't include him.

"Anyway, I've got to go," you said, patting his hand gently before letting go. You stood up from your chair, left some money for your drink on the table and slinged your bag on your shoulder. "Take care, Kunikida-kun."

His eyes met yours one last time, an expression of a certain kind of fondness can be seen on both of your eyes. A silent agreement was made in that moment as you lingered on his presence; an agreement to part but to still cherish the other deep in your hearts for as long as you live. Kunikida stood up from his seat, gingerly walked towards you and gave you a hug.

"Thank you," he whispered softly. You placed a hand on his back and returned his embrace, rubbing it in comfort.

Kunikida loosened his arms around you and let you go. He let you go as he also freed himself from you. He watched as you smiled, turned around and walked away. He envisioned himself that one night, when he turned and walked away from you too despite your cries for him to stay with you. Kunikida can't help but scoffed at the irony of it all.

He sat back down when you disappeared out of the door. He doesn't know if he'll ever have the courage to heal from all this and call to see you again without hurting anymore. He looked outside at the evening sky, his surroundings looked different as hues of purple and pink tinted the whole city. Kunikida exhaled, thanking that he can see the big picture now, it's just a shame that he had to move so far back to the point that he can't go back just to see how perfect it was.