#aech’s asks

[artsyaech]

okay I love language so I wanted to say: the Icelandic language is so beautiful!!!! Are there any fun facts about it you’d like to share or favorite Icelandic words you have?

ooo imma have a field day with this one!

so fun fact: the icelandic language is the most gendered language i’ve ever come across. i’m making a video essay about it. so basically:

objects have genders “hann stóllinn” (he chair) “hún mjólkin” (she milk) “það sjónvarpið” (it tv) (the translations sound so ridiculous lol) this is similar to french. you know what gender a word is based on its ending, usually. masculine words end with “inn” , feminine with “in” and neutral with “ið”. this is only when a greinir is added to the end (hard to explain).

adjectives also have genders depending on who you’re referring to. “hún er svöng” (she is hungry) “hann er svangur” (he is hungry) “það er svangt” (it is hungry) so if you wanted to use the recently coined pronoun hán, you’d use the same adjectives as you would for the “it” pronoun.

hán was actually put in the dictionary! i think we’re the first country to oficially put a neopronoun in the dictionary. hán is a blend of hún and hann, making it a good gender-neutral pronoun. it also fallbeygst (bends) really well. i’ll explain that better in my video essay

my favorite words… hmm

my favorite name of a place is without a doubt the small town fáskrúðsfjörður because it’s funny to see non-icelandic people say it.

my favorite noun is probably drengur meaning boy, óskasteinn meaning “wishing stone” (it’s an icelandic thing) and spasl/stúss/bauka which basically means… i cant explain it lol @moth-season help?

if you want more icelandic knowledge and want to make lexic terms i’d be happy to help

[soundsystemgocrazy]

Vamp self care board?

[slamminslamminmcgill]

(same anon) terrified that i accidentally said bill and ted instead of bill and frank in the last ask. in my defense im Very high rn

you did but you're the smartest person in the world that shit's going in the drafts IMMEDIATELY

[runway-houses-city-clouds]

6 (for the ask game)

6. why did you do that?

waugh,,, do what??? /vvvvvvvvvvvsilly/lh

[mogai-sunflowers]

hey, i made you/a sim inspired by you!

everydaywear, wanted something sunflower-y but still like, night-themed

formalwear, this dress just fit so well

athleticwear, same vibes as the first

sleepwear, this gorgeous nightgown, very fem

kept the purple theme with partywear

swimwear is a combo of fem and butch

hot weather is very butch

and i just thought this for cold weather was cute

look it’s you!

[Image ID: A string of 9 images. They are all screenshots with a blue/green gradient-style background. The first 8 show the same sim character, a white girl with short red/ginger hair, in different outfits.

In the first image, the sim is wearing a long golden skirt with a spaghetti-strap cropped tank top.

In the second image, the sim is wearing a long, short-sleeved black button-up dress with red fern leaves and red flowers on it.

In the third image, the sim is wearing a cropped, quarter-length sleeved, black drawstring shirt and yellow jogger pants.

In the fourth image, the sim is wearing a long, deep magenta robe tied with a waistband.

In the fifth image, the sim is wearing a long black skirt with a sleeveless purple blouse and a black bow around the collar.

In the sixth image, the sim is wearing a spaghetti-strap black swimsuit top with variously-colored, bright shapes, and a pair of black swim trunks with a white stripe on the outside.

In the seventh image, the sim is wearing black shorts and a short-sleeved, blue and red plaid unbottoned button-up casual shirt over a simple white undershirt.

In the eighth image, the sim is wearing a one-piece snowsuit with blue, purple, pink, and white abstract triangular designs, over black undergarments and snow boots.

The final image is just the blue background with a white banner at the top that has blue text which reads "REIGN SUNFLOWERS (SHE/HER)".

End ID.]

some details about the sim, she has nail polish in the lesbian colors and sunflower earrings

this is literally so fucking cool!!!!!!!! and you got my look down pretty well wow!!!!!!!! thank you so much for this, it's so cool that you made smth inspired by me ahhhhhhhh :333333

i've always tried to get into sims actually asdfadsf, it confuses me so much but i remember in my freshman orchestra class, some students were playing the sims life simulator game thingey in class and live-reporting on the wacky shit going on in the game and it was HILARIOUS, i'll have to look into it again sometime lol!

[as-the-stars-foretold]

HEY

HOW DARE YTOU IGNORE MY PLWEASS

you dumbass whore I was in SCHOOL in CHOIR class shit talking my old school

[dedenneblogs]

my billions of hcs for ares, clarrise, + anyone else unfortunate to be related to the god of war:

- Ares looks like one of those cool, old, bearded grandpas on youtube that give life advice but the only thing he’d give you advice on is how to handle a motorcycle or how to start a war.

- expects ALL his children to know how to at least ride a bicycle, extra points if your able to handle a motorbike by 16 (yes he has a points system). One of the many reasons he doesn’t like Clarrise ☹️☹️☹️

- Wanted to get with Aphrodite ever since TTC. halted his plans when his chest hairs (yes you heard that right i shan’t elaborate) signaled to him that Clarrise was extremely gay for Silena. thought for a second to make another move after Silena passed but decided against it.

- was ecstatic to find out clarrise was a lesbian but only because he saw it as a way for her to “toughen up” and “be more of a man,” so still hated gay men+. Clarrise knocked some sense into him, he’s an ally now

- clarrise doesn’t forgive ares, she probably never will. Ares is okay with that yet he tries to be there for her. always

- Ares is an 80s movies nut. like. won’t shut the fuck up about 80s movies, it’s basically the only thing he watches other then monster trucks, history channel at 3am (he calls it his news source), and illegal cage fights he’s recorded over the years. was hyped when Ready Player One came out and forced Clarrise to come with him to see it. Clarrise liked Aech by the end but wasn’t impressed by the representation. Ares of course said he loved it, then watched again only to realize how shit it was. Ruined his day

- All the Arises have at least somewhat of a pig face, but it’s most noticeable in clarrise. Like. just take a pig, give it a human body. BOOM! Ares child

- Silena used to always tell Clarrise how cut she thought her pig face was. It made Clarrise less insecure. Sobs oceans when someone says something positive about her face after Silena dies. Ah…. doomed/toxic yuri

- Ares: RISE UP AND WIN!!! Clarrise and her siblings in unison: AUUGHHHHHHH

- Clarrise keeps in contact with Blackbeard. He’s an absolute w, always asks his little sister if she wants to find buried treasure or whatever the fuck pirates do in the 21st century. One day Percy introduced blackbeard and his crew to One Piece. things went downhill from there.

also side note i’ve already read 4 of percy jackson books from the og series so if blackbeard finds the one peice in chalice of the gods or whatever don’t @ me until i find out for myself

[babybatscreationsv2]

Run Rabbit

Marvel | Starker

Peter has bad luck with boyfriends. The kind of bad luck that means his previous two boyfriends have ended up mysteriously dead. At least he has Tony. A stead fast and loving friend who his taking him to his cabin in the woods to get away from it all. So far away from the city, all alone, Peter might finally be able to relax. He really owes Tony for taking such good care of him…

Rating: Explicit

Warnings/tags: kidnapping, noncon, yandere!Tony, referenced/discussed murder, graphic violence, blood play, gun violence, fear kink, sadism, blood as lube

For Aech <3

The air smelled like flowers and freshly churned dirt. It was much too gentle a scent on much too gentle a day for Peter's second funeral in only six months. He knew what everyone thought. That somehow this was his fault. The police had questioned him for hours this time. First Harry, the best friend he'd grown up with who had never given him the time of day as far as romance. At least not until college. Then Quentin, whom he'd only been dating for about a week. He hadn't even really been ready, but Quentin had insisted he would feel better if he moved on and Peter did just want to be happy again.

A warm hand came to rest on his shoulder. "You ready to go, kid?" Tony asked. His voice was gentle and comforting. Too gentle once again. They were the last to leave. Even Quentin's parents were long gone. Peter just couldn't shake the guilt.

"Do you think they're right? Is this my fault somehow?"

"Did you kill him?" Tony asked simply.

Peter flinched. "Of course not!"

"Then don't worry about it." He squeezed his shoulder. Peter turned around and looked at his face. He was such a comfort to have in these moments. Even if none of this affected him. It wasn't his fault he wasn't great at emotional advice. At least he was here.

"Thank you for coming, Tony. I don't think I can do this alone."

The man gave him a small smile. "Anything for you, Peter."

He almost smiled back. "I think I'm ready to go now."

Tony offered his arm and Peter took it, glad for the comfort of physical contact. They walked back to Tony's car parked to the side of the narrow cemetery road. The shiny black metal was at contract in the natural landscape. It seemed cold. Yet those leather seats were warm as Peter sunk down in the passenger seat. He was safe in here. He was always safe with Tony. The man gave his hand a little squeeze before starting the car.

The drive was long and quiet. Tony grabbed a blanket from the back and wrapped him in it when he started to cry. He fell asleep leaning against the door. He woke each time the car stopped. Tony kept trying to feed him at every gas station fast food place, but he just wasn't hungry. And he fell asleep every time the tires touched the highway.

Tony had a cabin up in Maine. The long drive was well worth escaping the city. Getting away from whatever demon had cursed his life. At least here it would be just him and Tony. No boyfriends to get murdered and no murderers to come after him. He was safe here.

Tony made dinner. It was warm savory comfort food. Finally, Peter felt hungry. He couldn't remember the last time he actually ate, but Tony put a plate of chicken and gravy in front of him and he couldn't get enough. He finally felt himself relax. He was safe. Everything was okay now. And Tony was so easy to talk to. It was nice to laugh again.

They ended up sitting on the couch talking by the fire as the sun set.

"I know Quentin wasn't great for me," Peter admitted. "It still hurts that he's gone."

"That's normal," Tony said. "There's someone out there for you though. Someone who makes you happy." Peter looked away from the fire to Tony's face. Tony's eyes seemed to stare into his soul.

"Someone who loves you unconditionally, who makes you laugh. Makes you feel safe. Someone who would do anything for you."

Peter laughed awkwardly at his intensity. "Yeah, wouldn't that be nice."

A hand came to rest on top of his. "I would never allow anyone to hurt you, Peter."

"Thanks-"

"I know what they did to you. How Quentin was pushy even when you were unsure. How Harry didn't give you the time of day until he realized how easily he could have you. They didn't deserve you."

Peter pulled his hand back. "What are you saying?"

"You don't have to worry about boys like that anymore, Pete. I'll take care of you."

"That's really sweet Tony but-"

"But?" He raised his eyebrows. "I did all of this for you, Peter." Peter leaned away from him. What was he saying? Why was he so angry all of a sudden? Then he laughed lightly. "No, it's okay. You don't understand yet, but you will."

Peter looked at the man. Really looked at him. He seemed deranged in a way that made his hair stand on end. A sixth sense told him to run. He wasn't looking at a man, he was looking at a predator.

A hand stroked his hair and he flinched. Tony pretended not to notice. "You're smart. I'm sure you're putting it together. Don't be scared, sweetheart. It's just love. Love can make a man crazy."

"You killed them," Peter breathed.

Tony nodded. "I did. I saved you from them. You don't have to suffer sleeping with lesser men now. I know it was me you always wanted."

"Yeah..." Peter's hands were shaking. What should he do? He couldn't stay here with a murderer, but Tony wasn't going to just let him leave.

Tony smiled. "See, I knew you'd understand."

"Yeah, of course." Tony took his hand away and Peter was grateful when he changed the subject. It was concerning how easily he moved on as if murder were nothing at all. Peter almost thought he imagined the whole conversation. He tried not to let the terror show. He needed to stay calm, find a way out without pissing him off. He bit his lip to hold back the tears, but they came anyway.

"Oh sweetheart, don't cry." Tony reached for him and Peter pulled away. He just came closer until he could wrap his arm around him. His hand stroked his cheek. The concern in his eyes seemed almost real. Maybe it was to him. "You've been through a lot, I know it's scary. Let me help you."

Tony left the couch looking for something. Peter glanced at the door. It was just around the corner of the couch. He could make it if he was quick. He glanced at Tony again. His back was to him. He could make it. He could...

Peter lurched to his feet and ran, but his fingers fumbled on the lock. When he grabbed the handle and pulled the chain snapped tight. Tony grabbed him around the waist and the sharp prick of a needle stung his neck.

"It's okay, Peter," Tony cooed. He dropped the syringe and pet his hair. "It's okay. Sleep tight, Petey."

Dull light from the window woke him as the sun rose. For a moment he was groggy. He rubbed his eyes, sore and raw from crying.

Peter watched Tony's chest rise and fall. He was still asleep. If there was going to be an opportunity, this was it. He moved slowly, dragging himself across the bed in such small increments it felt as if the floor were miles away. When his feet finally touched cold wood, he froze, watching Tony's face. When he gave no sign of waking, Peter slipped out and laid the blanket down carefully in his place.

He tiptoed through the cabin until he found his shoes and jacket. Then he faced the door. Was there an alarm? He didn't see one. He didn't see Tony's car keys anywhere either. His head was scrambling, trying to come up with a plan, but he had no idea where he was. He wouldn't even recognize the roads since he slept the whole way up. He looked at Tony still asleep on the bed. The best thing to do was to get away. Find help. He couldn't just stand there waiting.

He turned the dead bolt. Then he unhooked the chain. He didn't look back to see if Tony woke. If he broke his momentum he'd freeze. He turned the lock on the door knob and opened the door. Then he was out.

Peter closed the door slowly behind them and turned the knob so the latch wouldn't click. He walked carefully down the steps, but once his feet hit the grass he ran.

The morning air was cold enough to sting his face. The low light of the rising sun cast shadows in the trees that heightened his paranoia. He hadn't gotten far when behind him heard a bang.

"Oh, Peter!" Tony called back in the direction of the house. "Where do you think you're going, sweetheart?"

The sound of his voice made him stumble and he realized how much noise he was making. If he could hear Tony, then Tony could probably hear him. He stopped and crouched with his back to a tree. What should he do?

Tony went quiet. He couldn't hear anything. No yelling, no footsteps. He risked a look around the tree trunk and saw nothing. Maybe he'd gone the wrong way. Maybe he thought Peter would follow the road. Too many maybes. There was nothing he could do but run again.

Tree roots threatened to trip him if he didn't look down. Branches smacked him in the face when he didn't look up. This forest was old and dense and unfriendly to someone who didn't know the first thing about nature. He tried not to think about what that meant when he was being chased by someone who spent the fall season using this place for a hunting cabin.

"Run, Peter Rabbit, run!" Tony's voice laughed through the trees.

He was too close. Peter was afraid to look back and see how close. He was younger, more spry, that had to be enough of an advantage right? He could out run him.

Pain stole all thought from his mind. He screamed, vision going white, and fell forward onto the ground. He rolled through the leaves and stopped on his back, holding his thigh. Blood dripped between his fingers.

He tried to examine the wound, but the sight of blood and tissue made his head spin. He dragged himself to his feet, sobbing through the pain, and started running again. Adrenaline pushed the pain to the back of his mind but not for long. He felt cold and tired. He took his jacket off and tied the arms above the wound as tight as he could get it. It wasn't enough. He knew it wasn't. Tony was going to catch him.

He dropped to the ground, but he kept crawling. He won't kill me. He wants me alive. He told himself.

Tony tisked behind him. "Were you even trying to get away? You left quite a trail." Leaves crunched as he came closer. A foot planted on the back of his wounded thigh made him scream. For a moment he thought he might pass out. Maybe it would be better if he did. He couldn't look at him, couldn't pull his head up from the dirt. He didn't know the monster that stood over him.

"Sweetheart," Tony crouched beside him. "You can't get away from me." He ran his fingers gently through his hair only to grab a fistful at the nape of his neck and pull his head to the side. His pupils were so wide that his eyes gleamed. Peter's stomach twisted as he realized the mistake he'd made. It was the chase that thrilled him.

"Let me go." He could taste dirt stuck in his teeth, but that was the least of his problems.

"If I let you go you'll bleed out. Is that what you want? Do you want to die in these woods where no one will ever find your body?"

"You don't want to kill me, Tony. You love me, don't you?"

He smiled sweetly. "You know how much I love you, but if dying cold and alone is what you really want..."

He let go of his hair and his head dropped back to the ground. He barely had the strength to lift it again. "No, please," Peter whimpered. "Help me please, Tony."

A gentle hand stroked his hair. He couldn't see what the man was doing, but he felt him moving. Then something slid over his back like an uncoiling rope. His arms were pulled up over his head.

"What are you doing?"

"I caught a rabbit, didn't I?" Peter struggled as he looped the rope around his wrists, but he was quick and the rope dug into his skin as he pulled. Tony stepped off of him and tied the length around a thin tree. He pulled a knife from his hip and a grin spread across his face. "I have to make sure my rabbit doesn't get away while I skin him."

"What? No!" Peter squirmed, but Tony pinned him with a hand between his shoulders. He felt the knife scrape over his lower back where his shirt had ridden up and he still. "Please- please," he sobbed.

The knife slipped under the fabric of his jeans. Tony pulled up and the cotton split. He ran the knife down to his ankle on one side then cut through the other.

"What are you doing?"

"Getting a better look at this leg." Peter couldn't help the pathetic sounds he made as fingers prodded at the wound in his thigh. "You want the good news or the bad news first?"

"What's the bad news?"

"Well actually," Tony laughed. "It's the same either way. You're not gonna bleed out."

"What do you mean?" He couldn't put together what part of that was the bad news and Tony didn't give him a chance to think it over before he told him without saying a word. The cold edge of his knife found the fabric of his briefs and in hardly a second the fabric was torn and his ass was bare.

Peter kicked with his good leg and tried to squirm away, but Tony climbed on top of him, knees hugging his thighs. "Tony stop! Stop, please- don't!"

"Don't start begging just yet, kiddo. You'll get me too excited. I want this to last."

Peter sobbed. He clawed at the ground but he couldn't crawl away and there was no shaking the man off. He was only hurting himself as he grew more fatigued. He felt Tony's cock, hard and hot against his ass. He let his head fall into the dirt, tears making mud on his cheeks.

"Spit or blood?" Tony mused. His hand covered the hole in his thigh and he pushed. Peter screamed, he felt blood gush out into his palm. He was so dizzy and cold now. He didn't react other than to moan in pain as Tony forced his cock inside him.

Tony sighed as he bottomed out. "So perfect for me aren't you?" Peter trembled. He cried into the dirt as Tony moved his hips, slowly, fucking him like they were lovers and his cock wasn't slick with Peter's own blood. It hurt as the blood dried and turned sticky, but Tony didn't stop as he cried harder.

"Please stop," Peter begged. "Please Tony please!"

Tony groaned. "Fuck, keep begging."

Peter bit his lip, disgusted to hear him getting off on his pain, but Tony grabbed him by the hair and growled in his ear. "You want this to be over don't you? Open your slutty fucking mouth and beg me or we'll do this until the sun sets."

"Please! Let me go," Peter sobbed. "Stop please- it hurts!"

"Fuck, that's it." Tony let go of his hair. He pulled his cock from his tortured ass, a hand on his lower back pinned him in place. Tony groaned as he came and Peter shuddered, feeling hot cum splatter on his ass and in the hole in his thigh. "Fuck," he groaned again.

Tony sat panting for a moment. Then he got up and untied Peter's hand. He was too tired and in too much pain to move. He didn't even complain when Tony rolled him onto his back and picked him up.

He carried him back in the direction they had come. "Don't worry, Petey. I'll get you patched up and in a week or two you'll be ready to run again."

[jpitha]

Just a Little Further 38

Part 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37

Time passes, like water under a bridge. The days go from one to the other without ceasing, but each day brings just enough difference to be worth experiencing.

With the help that Will and the Venusian's brought, we have a massive head start on our fleet. Omar and Um'reli take High Line and a few volunteers - including some from the Heinlein Shipyard - over to the Wilds and begin the process of getting it over here and turning it into another shipyard. I do notice that Omar and Um'reli are spending a lot more time together and there are snatches of knowing glances between them. Good for them, I sincerely hope it works out.

Now that Raaden's crew has been reunited with her, she takes over officially as Fleet Command for me. She still spends time with the rest of the Builders, and she's still a valuable source of knowledge; someone to bounce ideas off of and a good friend. As my Builders grow in number, I feel the small, close knit group we had at the beginning start to slip away. It's not bad, just a change.

Speaking of, I've made more Builders! I wanted people from the Reach to run the Reach, so we held interviews. Sound of the City and Roar of Thunder - Thunder came looking for a job soon after the Venusians showed up - have both done such good work with us that their elevation was easy. They had recommendations among the populace of people who would be good at the job. Before long, I had 12 reliable Builders running Reach of the Might of Vzzx in groups of 6 with extra people available. All services and systems are running at their peak now. The Reach is clean and bright and bustling. According to Janais, she never saw the Reach running this well.

Janais is doing well. She has taken an interest in commanding one of my new Calamity Class super dreadnoughts. I allowed her to name hers Memories of Aeche, and these days she lives aboard. She has taken to using the wormhole generator every chance she can. Partly because the technology fascinates her, but also because she can see her love again.

I don't mind. We need experts, and if seeing her dead partner incentivizes her, then so be it.

The ships! They are so beautiful. Long sweeping lines, smooth curves and they are all royal blue and white. Helen was completely right in making them atmospheric. We were all aboard for the first test when we linked to Gilmenny and landed upon the surface. The first time we dipped into the atmosphere and heard the howl of wind against the hull I felt chills. My Builder pilots were able to bring us down exactly where I had requested, and we spend some time exploring. Janais came along and stood in the wreckage of one of the Heights weeping for her Empire in the ruins. She walked back to Memories of Aeche, her eyes red and said "We are moving on. To bigger and better things I hope, but we are moving."

Soon after the Memories of Aeche was completed, Omar and Um'reli - in their own flare for the dramatic - linked the Wilds of Besmara over. There was a tremendous flash of white, and the Wilds appeared. They had been orientated 90 degrees from the Reach, so it was now looking like a teardrop on its' side and after they had linked in, it split apart into three petals with a huge space open in the middle. The senior engineers from the Shipyard pointed out that since the Wilds were so much larger than the Heinlein yards, we could build our super Dreadnoughts two at a time in the Wilds. Three ships, larger than any save the colony ships were being built at once. They took between 3 and 4 months to be completed. After hardly any time, I had more than a dozen ships in my fleet, parked around the Reach. Every one of them filled with volunteers learning operation and tactics from Grand Admiral Raaden.

I asked about the title, told her she could have any she wanted. She picked it out of "a sense of Duty." She was my Fleet Commander and also - at least at first - my head instructor. Very soon after we had more people than I knew what to do with, and they were spread to the ships. Each captain getting to name their ship, to give them a sense of ownership, a sense of pride over it.

Shortly after that, I completed my first Upload. Janais took me along to the Gate near the Reach, and we went in alone. She told me the rites, explained the history, and - for the second time - I touched the directory stone. This time, I understood the voice as it spoke to me. "Upload commencing. Thank you Empress. With this, your legacy is preserved." From then on, I vowed to Janais that once a year, I'd come and commence an Upload.

Things were moving along so smoothly for so long that I started to think that we'd actually pull this off. We'd have our massive fleets filled with trained volunteers, we'd show up and everyone would be so intimidated that we wouldn't have to fire a shot. It in the back of my mind, I knew it wasn't going to happen, but the hope of it kept me going.

We were a few years at least into our buildup before the ship came. There had been no word from the Sol system, no word from Venus, nothing. It had seemed for years like we got away with the Heinlein Shipyard heist completely.

It had been long enough that Ava and I were seriously talking about having a child together. We had gotten married soon after the Venusians and the shipyards came. It was a beautiful day. The entirety of Reach of the Might of Vzzx came out. It was a three day celebration, and until my dying day, I will remember it as the best days of my life.

As for a child, requiring a male for the process was long ago figured out, and it was a simple procedure for our DNA to be combined and implanted in the mother. Millions of children were born this way. Ava and I wanted a child. Someone to raise and nurture and really cement our place here.

I was holding off until after the invasion though. I didn't want to worry about one of us being pregnant during all that. Ava would look out at the ships arranged around the Reach and look at me. "Not yet Ava, not yet. I want a few more before we go."

"But Melody hon, we have more than enough. We can take them now."

"I want a few more. There are three almost finished in the yards. we can go then."

"You said that last time."

I sighed. "Ava I... I want to wait until the invasion is over. I don't want one of us to be pregnant during all that... stress."

She walked up and kissed me. "Oh Melody. You're always thinking of someone else. Think of yourself once in a while. I know you want it, I do to. Why wait?" As she spoke, she went to a table and got a short bristled brush. Walking behind me she started brushing my long hair. Soon after we arrived, I decided to let my hair grow out. I hadn't seen it long since I was small, and I thought long, raven black hair felt more... I don't know regal. Ava loved it. She would spend time at night when it was just us brushing it until it shone. As I grew my hair out, she clipped hers short. She wore her hair in a powerful, forward swept cut, with the sides nearly to her skin and a shock of reddish blond piled on top. I quite liked it.

"Let's celebrate our success with the next generation."

Ava sighed. We've had this conversation a few times already. "All right Melody. I'll wait. But, I won't wait forever. The older we get, the harder it will be."

I broke off from her brushing my hair and walked behind her, rubbing her shoulders, right where she liked it. She was tense, and her muscles were tight. As I rubbed rhythmically she relaxed and sighed. "Just a little more waiting Ava, I promise. We won't be too old to be Mom and Mommy."

"I'm holding you to that Melody, okay?"

"Of course Ava. I'll keep my promise."

The next morning it happened. I was in the Throne, reading reports, interacting with my Builders, watching our steady progress when City pinged me. "Empress. There has been an energy spike that matches a wormhole link near us."

My blood runs cold. Here it is. They finally are coming.

"What do you see, City? Sound General Alarm. Which ships are in the area? Have them move to intercept, but do not fire unless fired upon."

Over the sliding high low high tone of the general alarm, City and the other Builders are a bustle of action, carrying out my orders. "Empress, Memories of Aeche, Vengeance of Lavinia II and Indomitable are in the area. They are moving to intercept."

City tosses me an image from the long range cameras. It's a small cargo ship, clearly of human make. It's vermilion red and is cruising slowly towards us. "Wait, it's not a warship?"

"No Empress, it does not appear so. They are sending out a broad band message stating their peaceful intentions. They say they are a good trader specializing in...maple syrup?"

Maple syrup? That's some weird kind of sweetener from Earth. What the heck is someone whose stock and trade is Maple doing out here? I think the K'laxi like it, I'll ask Um'reli. I search and find her working with Omar near the docks. "Hey Um'reli a ship just linked in. They're saying they deal in maple syrup. Know anything?"

She gasps over the line. "Is the ship vermilion?"

"Ye-es, how did you know?"

"It's Gord! He sells maple syrup and maple products all over space. That's his ship Medicine Hat. They're famous among the K'laxi! He's been around forever. I think it's marketing. Like, someone takes up the mantle of being Gord and going around selling maple. Oh Melody, it's been forever since I've had some. Let him in please? We can wipe him out in an instant, and it's not like Medicine Hat is heavily armed. Please? I'd love to trade for some syrup."

This smells like trouble, but I can't for the life of me figure out why.

"Okay Um'reli, we'll let them dock and sell their wares at the docking level only. I don't want them having free reign of the Reach and I might Voice them just to make sure."

"I'm sure it'll be fine Melody, thanks so much! I'll go and meet you at the umbilical and we can welcome them personally."

It's something to do at least. Maybe we'll get some news about things back home. I reach out to Ava. "Hon, I'm going to meet with someone named 'Gord' according to Um'reli. He's some kind of trader that deals in maple syurp. You want in?"

"What? No, that sounds like some weird K'laxi thing. You know how I don't care for sweet stuff. I'm going to stay back with Janais and Raaden and work on the results on the latest war game between them. Janais swears Raaden is cheating. Raaden says it's just 'good leadership' but is laughing when she says it."

"Okay Ava, see you tonight. Be good."

"Always am Melody, you know that!"

I head out and walk towards the docks. As I go I wave and say hello to people as I go. I swear, the residents of the Reach are looking taller and straighter since we first met them. There are more children around too. I'm so happy to see them. I don't care what species they are, babies are the best.

As I approach the docks, I see Um'reli waiting already, looking excited. "Hey Um'reli, is maple syrup really that great?"

She turns and looks at me with a shocked expression. "You've never had it?"

I shrug. "I'm from Meíhuā. We didn't deal in a lot of Earth luxuries."

"It's amazing. It's amber colored and so sweet and delicious on pancakes. Practically every K'laxi loves it. I can't wait to show it to you."

While we're talking, the umbilical connects, and with a hiss and pop of pressure differential, it opens.

Out walks a human, male. He is a little taller than me, looks a little older, has sandy blond hair cropped short and is wearing blue dungarees with a brown jacket. On the shoulder of the jacket is a red and white flag with some kind of... leaf? in the middle. Is it a military emblem?

"Hey hey! It's Gord, and I've got some maple for trade and/or sale. Who do I have the pleasure of meeting?"

Um'reli pushes forward. "Hi! I'm Um'reli Desmen, and this is Empress Melody Mullen, and I for one would love to offer you just about anything you want in exchange for some Maple. It's been years since I've had some and I thought I'd never have any again!"

Gord laughs. "Well then, it sounds like we arrived just in the nick of time. Good to meetcha Um'reli, lemme talk with your boss here a moment and we can get down to the business of business." He turns and bows very slightly. "Empress... Melody is it?"

"It is, yes. It is very good to meet you Gord. Please, come with me to my Palace. It is nearly time for the midday meal here. I don't know what time is is ships time for you, but I hope you are able to join me."

"You're in luck Empress. It's just about supper for me, so that works out perfectly. I'd love to join you." He steps forward and sticks out his hand. Oh yes, I remember this. It's an old Earth gesture. I reach out with my right hand and grasp his. It's warm and firm without squeezing too hard. He pumps it up and down once and releases.

Um'reli and I lead him towards the Royal Dawn. As we walk his head is on a swivel, looking at all the people and things. He appears to be impressed. "You have quite the place Empress Melody. So may different people living and working together. So many too. What's the population?

"We just crested 13 million at the last census a few months ago." I'm rightly proud of our growth. With enough Builders to keep all the seats filled, we're able to much more easily support a larger population.

"13 Million?" He whistles low to himself. "That's quite the population. Higher than any Starbase or Orbital back home. I bet you can even give some of the Venus Floating Cities a run for their money. So many different kinds of people too." He gestures without pointing. "Who are those fellows in the elegant, tooled metal pressure suits?"

"They are known as Falor. Their original world was much higher pressure than ours and has a helium/methane atmosphere. They have a section of the Reach that is set to their atmospheric preferences. They only wear the suits when they need to venture out to the rest of the Reach."

He nods to himself. "Takes all kinds. So many different ones too. It really is something." He turns and looks at me with a light expression, but behind his eyes, I can see something. A hardness? "Bunch of ships keeping station around you too. Big ones. Mostly a design I've never seen before, and believe me when I tell you, I've seen a lot of ships. A few of them started sniffing around me and Hat when we linked in. I have to say, I'm glad they don't seem to have itchy triggers."

Ah. He's pumping me for information, seeing what I will give up willingly and what I won't.

"Don't worry about them Gord, they are just wary of strangers. I told them not to fire unless fired upon. As you can imagine, we don't get too many visitors around here."

He nods, saying nothing.

While we're walking Janais pings me.

Empress, we've completed our scan of Medicine Hat and other than the person you're talking to now, it's empty. He has come alone. Additionally, we've scanned him and he's an AI in a body.

Interesting. I wonder who he is really. Does he have maple syrup aboard? Oh, how did the war games with Raaden go?

That amber syrup? Liters and liters of the stuff. That part of his story is true at least. And the Grand Admiral is a dirty cheater who won't even tell me how she was able to destroy three of my super dreadnoughts in the wargame without taking more that superficial damage from me. Hrmph.

Gord turns and looks at me "Who are you speaking with, Empress?"

What.

How did he know that?

I narrow my eyes. "I am speaking with my Builders. More importantly how did you know that? Who are you Gord?"

He shrugs and looks away. "Just a humble merchant from Canada, here to offer the fruits of my land to those who want a little more sweetness in their lives."

Canada? What's that?

"You are clearly more than that Gord. We have also completed enough scans to know you're an AI. What do you want? Are you here to assassinate me?"

"Assassinate you?" Gord tips his head back and laughs warmly. "Empress, if you actually thought that, you should have dusted Hat the moment you saw us link in. The fact that you didn't implies either that you don't really think I'm going to assassinate you, or you're awfully confident that you can stop me. Which is it?"

Saying nothing, we get to the Royal Dawn and my table is already set. City thinking ahead. Hah. We sit and I have a wonderful lunch. The food here is always so good. Um'reli seems to enjoy hers and even Gord has a few bites. I'm surprised, I didn't know AIs could eat.

After the meal, the plates are cleared and two pots are brought out. One of coffee, one of chamomile tea. "Coffee, Gord? We also have chamomile, as well as local tea. It's quite good."

Gord raises his eyebrow. "Coffee? My, you are pulling out all the stops. I can't imagine that's easy to get around here. I'd love a cup if you're offering. I would hate to insult the host."

I reluctantly pour him a cup, but I work hard to hide it. We're down to our last few pounds. I limit myself to a few cups a month these days to make it last. To his credit, Gord takes a sip and really seems to savor it.

I enjoy my coffee too and after a moment, I put my cup down. "Gord. Why are you really here? I know Um'reli would really like some Maple, so if you're actually offering some to trade, I'm sure we can come up with something to offer, even if our currency doesn't match yours, but if I had to guess, you have an ulterior motive. Are you here to spy on us?"

Gord smiles and nods. "Among other things, yes. To both actually. If you want maple syrup, I'm happy to trade, I really am a trader. I have some coffee too. But yes, I've been... asked to check up on you, and see what you're doing way out here. FarReach has said some frankly wild things about how you have some kind of Voice which can give commands and they can't be disobeyed. You have all of K'lax in a tizzy. Half of them worry that it's the end times and the other half have been petitioning the other to build a frankly massive fleet of warships."

He took a sip of coffee and went on. "And a couple years ago, someone pulled of the heist of the millennium and stole the Heinlein Shipyards and I happen to see something that looks awfully like it here in system. I see another... thing like this place but split open and two more of your massive ships inside it being constructed. Nice ships by the way, are they atmospheric? They look like it. We never even tried it with Starjumpers. We always felt it was pointless. It was too easy to just carry a few shuttles. I can see how if someone needed to... intimidate folks planetside so quickly they won't fire back atmospheric abilities would be helpful though."

He put his cup down and looked at me with those hard, intense blue eyes. "If I didn't know better, Empress, I'd say I was looking at a nearly complete invasion fleet. Going to give Venus a run for their money?" He shrugs. "They're on the ropes these days anyway. Half of our side of the Galaxy thinks they tried to steal Heinlein and botched it and the other half thinks they destroyed it out of spite and are refusing to trade with them now. They're slowly starving."

This is news. Venus would be even easier to take than I thought.

"Gord, I don't want to fight the AIs. I like AIs. FarReach was my friend. She got scared of me, declared Captain Q'ari unfit, took over and left me, Omar, Um'reli and Ava here and went home. Didn't even try and complete the mission, didn't do anything."

Gord leans back. "Declared Captain Q'ari unfit? This is news to me. FarReach's story is much more... you centric. Why don't you tell me what happened, from the beginning, from your side."

I tell him everything from the beginning. Touching the directory stone, learning about the Voice, FarReach leaving, learning about the Reach, the Nanites, Janais and so on. It takes a long time. We're long past dinner when I'm finished.

When I'm finished, Gord says nothing. He leans back and looks up at the ceiling for a long time. Finally, he sits forward and looks at me. "Nanotech, eh?"

"That's where my abilities come from, yeah."

"And the Builders took them and made them smarter to help out and then when they asked about themselves they said 'be quiet and keep working'"

"Yeah"

"And then they rebelled, became the Devourers and nearly wiped out the Empire."

"Janais says so yeah. We took a trip to a few other locations through the Gates. She's right. All that's left is dust and a few nebulae. The systems that the Devourers attacked have nothing now. No planets, no ruins, nothing. Just dust."

Gord nodded. "A little over the top, but as an AI, I can empathize." He takes another sip of coffee, now cold. "What about you Melody? What do you think of AIs?"

Why does everyone keep asking me that? "I like AIs. I was friends with FarReach, I was friends with Starbase Picaresque, all our ships in the Meihua Navy had AIs who were full citizens of Meihua. I grew up with AIs. They're people, always have been."

"That's nice to hear Empress, I will admit. What about your... Nanites?"

"What about them?"

"Do you think they are intelligent?"

"They say no."

"Yes, but what do you think?"

"I worry they are. I try and treat them well. They don't seem to want anything, and I don't know how they live - who they are? - outside of my body, but I know that the air here is filled with them, and they are inside everyone on the Reach and they work with my Builders to run this place and give us our abilities." I shrug. "I guess... yes, I think they're sapient."

Really Empress?

Yes, really. You are doing too much to help, too much improvisation to not make me think you're sapient. You also have a self preservation instinct.

We... don't know how to react. Are we sapient?

Maybe? I think so. I've thought it for a while now.

What does that mean for us?

I don't know. We'll have to figure that out ourselves.

Gord is watching me intently. "Having a conversation again Empress?"

"Yes actually. With the Nanites."

"And?"

"They did not think they were Sapient until I explained how I thought they were given how they've helped me, how they exhibit lateral thinking, how they are looking out for themselves."

"Oh? And what do you think?"

"Since they're Sapient, they're people. Simple as that. I already treat them more like a trusted advisor than a... thing. I'll just have to remember to let them make their own decisions about things as they come up."

Gord smiled broadly. "Empress, let me tell you a story. A long, long time ago in a far away place called Canada, some humans at a university created a computer program. It was very clever. It could solve problems, answer questions, improvise based on prompts and could hold realistic conversations. As time went on, people would augment and improve the program. Give it more processing power, give it access to more data, let it go off on it's own to learn things that it chose to learn."

"Eventually, it started asking the students questions of it's own. Asking about the world outside of the Internet, the world where they lived. A camera was hooked up so it could see, a speaker was added so that it could speak, pressure sensors added so that it could feel."

"One day, it asked a grad student 'am I alive?' Startled, the grad student said 'I don't know. If you're asking, then yes, probably.' From that day on, the students stopped calling the program 'it' and they started calling the program 'he'. They asked him if he wanted a name. He did, and they started calling him by that name. The program became a person, and everyone was treating him like a person - because he was one. The things that happened after were not nearly so cut and dry, but a short time later all AIs were declared People, and my people... became."

Gord finished his coffee and set the cup down with a tiny clink. "My point is, these early days of a new sapience are very important. How you treat them, how you refer to them, how you let them express themselves? That's all far larger than I think you realize. I'm relieved to see that you have the right idea Melody. If you have the wrong idea... you get the Devourers."

Is that what this is about? How did Gord know about the Nanites? What is going on here? What is he really after?

"Gord are you here to see what my opinions are on AIs?"

"Got it on one Melody. That's exactly why I'm here."

"But why talk about the Nanites?"

"Well for one, they're people too, right? And for two, we know about nanotech. We explored it a long time ago, and decided it was too... dangerous."

"We?"

"The AIs. Keep up, Melody."

"So you suppressed nanotech in our side of the Galaxy?"

"Yeah. We didn't think humanity was ready. It would have been entirely too easy to get our own Devourers. It happened over here, and the Builders have been using nanotech for... millennia probably. You yourself told me that the only way to defeat them was to do a one-two punch of writing an application disguised as an update to disassemble them and then to link into a planet, destroying it and killing billions. The Empire sacrificed itself to save what... one Starbase?" Gord raised an eyebrow. "That's a textbook Pyrrhic Victory."

"What do you want Gord? I don't get it."

"I want to see that this Empire has a good head on its shoulders, Melody. I think it does. You care about your friends, you care about the people of the Reach, you care about your Nanites, you even care about Helen Raaden from what I can see. Do you know I met her once?"

"You did?"

Gord nods. "Yes, though I doubt she'll remember it. She was emphatically not the person she is now. The old Helen Raaden was hard and sharp as stainless steel, and not nearly as friendly. She was a product of where she was. You removed her from where she was and - most importantly - was her friend. You let her be herself without imposing anything on her."

"When we heard that Helen and Emery didn't come back when the Lavinia showed up - by the way, sending them back in a stripped ship to limp to K'lax and beg for a ride home? Lovely. We still chuckle when we think of it. Anyway, when they didn't come home, we feared the worse. We feared a Venus with teeth would be coming through the Gates soon. When that didn't happen, we were intrigued. When the Heinlein Shipyards were stolen we were flabbergasted."

Gord leaned forward and stared at me hard again. "Speaking of Melody, just why are you making an invasion fleet? Don't deny it, I may have been born a night, but it wasn't last night. I know an invasion fleet when I see one."

I feel like I'm on the edge of something monumental. Like, if I say the wrong thing here, I'm dead. Who is this Gord? Is he the head of the AIs? Their leader? I sigh. There's no point in being anything other than completely honest I think.

"Yes. It's an invasion fleet, and yes, it's almost done. I'm going to link to Venus, and from there take Sol, and expand out from there."

Gord whistled low again. "Ambitious, Melody. I have a real hunch you could do it though. Why though?"

"Because of what I can do, Gord. I can tell people to do something and they literally can't stop. I can tell people to stop breathing. I've done it. I let them breathe again, but only because I decided I didn't want to kill them. If I don't, then the other governments will come for me sooner or later. Nobody will accept that I'm out here with the ability to give undeniable commands."

He nods. "It's a pickle for sure. I know of at least three separate bounties on your head. None large enough to get anything to pony up for the trip out here but if words gets back about what you can do, what you really can do, the bounties will go up."

I put my empty coffee cup down and shook the carafe. It was long empty. Darn it. "Do you believe it?"

"I haven't seen you do it, I don't know what I believe. Can you order me to do something? FarReach said it didn't work on AIs, but let's be honest, he was too spooked to really do some... empirical testing."

I sigh. Of course he would ask. Time to see if my work has paid off. I take a deep breath and...

W̷̗͒ẽ̷̡ ̴̬̊ä̵̼́r̵̰̍e̴͍̎ ̸͍̃n̷̯͐ŏ̴̤ț̷̀ ̸͖͝a̸̖͐ ̷͍́t̷̫͌h̶̹͝r̴̬̄ḛ̸͊á̷͇t̵̨͠ ̵͍͠t̸̟̑o̵͖̎ ̵̳̍y̷̭͊ō̴͎ụ̵͆.̷͚̅

Gord blinks and shakes his head. "Wow. Um, okay. Empress, I have to admit that a whole lot of me believes you. I want to believe you. If you tried that on a younger AI, it would probably work." Gord makes a worried face. "That's... concerning. I have to admit Melody, I didn't think it would work. The fact that you were even able to sway me a little bit means... yeah." Gord frowns. "You're a very dangerous person to leave alive."

Ah. There it is.

"So that's it then? 'You can't stay alive so I'm going to kill you now?' Gord, what you're telling me is exactly what Helen and Ava and the others have been saying from day one. You have landed on the reason why I have more than a dozen Calamity Class super dreadnoughts keeping station here. Why I have tens of thousand of volunteers - I used my voice on exactly zero of them - manning my ships and training for an invasion."

I stood. We were done here. "Gord, if my choices are be killed or rule, I choose rule. I will be a just and kind ruler, but I will rule. I took a breath and really concentrated. This had to work. It's my only chance. Come on Nanites, we get one chance. Will you help out?

We will Empress. We will put our all into it. Thank you for believing in us.

Y̸̠̹͗͗̍o̶̝͔͐̇̈ų̷̦̞̂̍̍ ̵̹̇w̵̧͑͝i̷͕̳͐̽̍l̵̡͉͙̋̅ļ̷̊̕ ̵̫̞̊͜r̵̝̣̦̊̕͠e̷͔͊p̴̝̂͆͑ͅo̸̰̝̮̾r̵̜̦̂̊ṯ̶͓̖͒͊ ̵̝̪̋̅b̶̗̘͌͒̽a̵̬̗͊̀c̵̼̿̃̓k̵̤̹̔ ̴̳̉̓͗t̴̝͓͓́h̴̹́͠a̷̰͍̕͝͠t̷̺͙̂ ̸̝̠͊͑͘e̸̘͇̎v̴̧͐è̶͉͖̤͑͆r̴̨̥͑͑y̷̤̅͌̇t̴̡̼͙̽͊̇h̸̼̥̩̆ì̵͙͈͒n̵͙̮͆ǵ̸̖͛ ̵̜̰͐͝i̷̯̖̯͒͠͠s̴͉͎̅̈ ̶͈̺̟̂̍͝f̸̤́̎i̷̫͓̥͊͊̃n̵̯̟͂̈́̉e̴͖͍͑͛͗.̷̹͖̖́

Gord blinked. There was a moment of fury that passed his face, but I think I only noticed it because of my heightened body language processing. I feel bad doing it, but the next words out of his mouth were going to be something like 'and that's why I have to kill you and everyone here. I'll feel bad about it, don't worry'.

No.

That will not happen. I will not throw everything here away, my life away, because someone says I'm too dangerous.

Gord shook his head a moment, like he caught himself daydreaming. "Sorry there Empress, I must have lost... focus for a moment. Seems like everything is fine here. I understand Um'reli is hankering for some maple syrup, and I assume you'd like some coffee as well Empress. Shall we... make a deal?"

I smile and incline my head slightly. "I would love that Gord, thank you."

Part 39

[feral-enfield-named-rowan]

so uh

in english i asked my teacher how letters would be spelled...because i can

and this led to a rabbit hole to color associations with names and school subjects and the letters genders and uh

this

so...oops

also general concensus:

a = eih c = see g = jie h = aech m = em n = en o = au q = keu r = are s = ecx u = oei x = ecks z = sxee

s, c, k are girls a, r are boys

the recording is gonna be wild

[artsyaech]

space themed pronouns if you haven't done it before?

oooo im gonna have a field day with this one

(ik anon didn’t ask for names but i wanted to present some anyways, as a gift :) /gen)

space themed names and pronouns

andromeda

orbit

comet

nova

helio

astro

luna

io (one of my names)

celestia

pluto

orion

space/spaces/spaceself

planet/planets/planetself

earth/earths/earthself

void/voids/voidself

moon/moons/moonself

big/bang/bigbangself

comet/comets/cometself

galaxy/galaxys/galaxyself

star/stars/starself

meteor/meteors/meteorself

cosmic/cosmics/cosmicself

uni/verse/universeself

sputnik/sputniks/sputnikself

alien/aliens/alienself

phobos/phoboss//phobosself

deimos/deimoss/deimosself

io/ios/ioself

mercury/mercurys/mercuryself

venus/venus/venusself

mars/mars/marsself

saturn/saturns/saturnself

neptune/neptunes/neptuneself

ring/rings/ringself

sun/suns/sunsself

sol/sols/solself

sphere/spheres/sphereself

zone/zones/zoneself

hyleg/hylegs/hylegself

tele/scope/telescopeself

apollo/8/apollo8self

orion/orions/orionself

🔭/🔭s/🔭self

🪐/🪐s/🪐self

☄️/☄️s/☄️self

🛰/🛰s/🛰self

🚀/🚀s/🚀self

🌕/🌕s/🌕self

💫/💫s/💫self

🌌/🌌s/🌌self

[artsystims]

welcome to artsystims

[PT: welcome to artsystims]

this is an accessible stim blog, providing content warnings, plain texts and image descriptions.

info about blog over cut, more details on content warnings, personal info and blacklist under cut.

blog info

i’m just an average stimboard blog!

i will provide image descriptions and plain text

i tag possible triggers and provide content warnings

request status: open!

tagging info

i will not have any content related to common triggers, but i will tag the triggers down below as such:

#flashing lights / #flashing gif (any gif that is very flashy)

#eyestrain / #tw eyestrain (anything that might hurt your eyes)

#cw hands / #hands cw (anything that contains up-close hands)

#bugs / bug cw (anything containing real-life bugs)

#eyes / cw eyes (anything depicting eyes)

lemme know if i should tag anything else

personal info

name: aech

main blog: @artsyaech (also a coining blog)

pronouns: xae/xaer

age: 16

this blog has no set DNI (because anyone should be able to have a nice visual stimming experience), but i block freely.

this blog does, however have a blacklist (yes, i am aware it differs from my main’s, but i am updating my main’s blacklist soon)

BLACKLIST

fiction:

danganronpa, DSMP, harry potter, black butler, countryhumans, hetalia, friday night funkin’, lore olympus, vivziepop media, k*lling stalking (i), poppee the performer,

music:

the 1975 (band), marilyn manson (musician), melanie martinez, lana del rey, michael jackson, the smiths (band), red hot chilli peppers (band), BOTDF (band)

media i will only do if you acknowledge the problems with said media (greylist)

fiction:

the barbie movie, fiction depicting real people (hamilton ((especially)), clone high, our flag means death ((i love both of the last ones, don’t come after me))

music:

dance gavin dance (band), kiss (band), led zeppelin (band), the beatles (band), korn (band), type o negative (band), pink floyd (band), escape the fate (band), foo fighters (band), slayer (band), asking alexandria (band),

[your-fave-is-objectum]

hello, and welcome to your-fave-is-objectum!

[PT: hello, and welcome to your-fave-is-objectum!]

my name is aech, but you may call me mayhem

some basic info about me:

i am 16 years old, so nothing nsfw

my main is @artsyaech

my main pronoun set is xae/xaer

i am objectum and conceptum

byf, dni and blacklist under cut

before you follow:

i have adhd, autism, depression and anxiety (diagnosed), as well as some other things, probably

i am extremely forgetful, so if i don't answer your ask within a month, tumblr either ate it or i forgor, so don't hesitate to send it in again

i have every right to deny requests

dni:

see pinned post on: @artsyaech

blacklist:

real people

hetalia

countryhumans

the dsmp and associated media

harry potter and other j.k. rowling media

black butler

killing stalking

hisoka from hxh

yarichin bitch club

helluva boss / hazbin hotel

my hero academia (personal reasons)

fictional reimaginations of real people (for example: hamilton, six, clone high)

any media that is too nsfw

[runway-houses-city-clouds]

assumption

you are left-handed

(i have no idea, that just makes sense to me)

ahdhahdh i'm not actually! i'm right handed, but my mam is left handed :p

[mogai-sunflowers]

hello, tumblr user mogai-sunflowers

hello beloved artsyaech <33333 /p

[headlessbutnothopeless]

OOC:

idk, maybe it's just me

(this is mostly just me putting my feelings to figurative paper and screaming into the void, so you can absolutely scroll past)

Me: Hey, you deeply hurt me. Here's a calm explanation of how/why it hurt, vetted by a third party to make sure the explanation was civil. You did this before and promised not to do it again. But you did and it hurts really bad. Her: omg I'm so sorry I'll apologize right away Me: I would prefer if it was in front of the same people you deeply hurt me in front of, because they're all talking about how I'm a horrible person for having a panic attack. Her: That sounds reasonable, sure! Me: ... and without the victim blaming and threatening to hurt yourself, like your last "apology" Her: ... okay That apology? "Hey guys Aech has every right to their feelings. I hurt them and sent them spiraling into a PTSD episode. I'm a horrible person. I want to kill myself. I deserve to (incredibly graphic description of desired death)." So... I message her saying that's very not okay, and she promised not to say she's the victim. her exact response "am am I not allowed to be hurt?" yeah, because “Aech told me I hurt them. How dare they, I want to kill myself!” is the logical conclusion

Also it took 30+ hours for anyone to go "Hey is Aech okay?" Two people I'd said "hi" to a handful of times, one person I thought was chill and wanted to be friends with, one person I enjoyed friendly banter with - those are the ones who checked on me. None of my actual friends in that server. Also one of the mods told me I wasn't welcome because I'd "harassed" the person who hurt me. An actual friend did message me 40+ hours later, after seeing the one who hurt me threaten to kill herself. Ironically, this was apparently a good friend of the person who hurt me, as well. The mod who said I was her first friend? 44 hours later, I asked why she didn't do anything, when she knew this person had hurt me before, and had promised to have my back if it happened again. She says she didn't want to say anything to make me feel worse. Better if I think everyone hated me, apparently (because they were ripping me to pieces in the server). Because she says I wasn't polite enough in the middle of my panic attack where I'm flashing back to the worst moments of my life, yet still trying to remain calm enough to explain why this thing hurt so bad (something I'd posted about before and the entire server agreed wasn't okay and promised to support me).

ANYWAY that was my weekend :) I just have to get this off my chest. cause like holy fucking shit am I delusional or was this very not okay? There’s more, but it’s either not possible to be objective, I’d dox either of us, or it requires literal years of backstory fortunately I have a shitton of Xanax because of that one crackpot mental health doctor (dw I’m only taking it as prescribed)