#all 5 configurations are interesting to me lol

[deliciouskeys]

[our-transmasculine-experience]

ill have officially been on T for 5 years come early winter 🎉 looking back at all my "first time"s coming out (age 12+13, got kicked out for 2, then 9 days. age 17+18, got thrown in jail for a month each. age 19+20, got ignored and correctively abused)

i never could have conceived being this happy and living how *I* want to, in a state where queers have ironclad protections encoded in law. sure, i went through some genuinely captial F fucked up shit, bein on my own (as an obvious fagdyke) on the streets in the Deep South since early 17. but im 27 now and fucking loving life🥹 and i actually like who i am now!! i have a comfortable little apartment, a nice job, with my 2 wonderful cats, and surrounded by friends who think my being trans/queer/2 spirit is the *least* interesting thing about me(most are queer themselves lol but ykwim). i dont totally recognize the person in the mirror yet (i have a full ass beard yall🤦🏽 still weird to need to shave every day) 💜but we all take different journeys, and at our pace

you hear that baby gays? it *does* get better. the part people rarely want to acknowledge though, is how much work it is to make it better for yourself. its SO worth it. period point blank. YOU ARE WORTH THE WORK. do every queer a favor, and start surviving in spite of them. start thriving and living and succeeding and growing and LOVING for yourself, and if thats too overwhelming. do it cuz fuck em🤘🏼and cuz i love you💕

also, wear condoms EVERY TIME with EVERY SEX ACT and EVERY CONFIGURATION of genitals 😭 there's a condom or equivalent for each variation of bits

holy shit. thank you for this. this is incredible.

[the-marron]

Shipper Tag Game

Tagged by @forerussake , thank you 🥰

1. What ship were you completely obsessed with when you were a teenager, but now you don't care about anymore?

Hmmm, a hard question right off the bat, because even if I am no longer actively seeking the ship content out anymore, usually I retain a lot of fondness for it, so there are precious few ships I used to be into and that I am simply meh about now, but I think it would be ShikaIno, from Naruto. Canon came at me hard, so while I have some fondness for it, it is what it is, and I am not that much into Naruto anymore either way, so it doesn't hurt much.

2. Which ship would you consider your first one?

Simba/Nala? Lol 😂 but in all seriousness, I think it would be BatCat. Or Aragon/Arwen, I am very hazy on the details when exactly I imprinted on those, the timeline is not clear

3. Your first fanfic was about which couple?

Read or written? Read: no idea, I think it might have been some self-insert into Inuyasha universe? Written: Sirius/Remus

4. Do you remember the first couple you saw fanart of?

Nope. When I discovered the internet I discovered all of it at an alarming pace, but my bet would be on either Sirius/Remus or some couple from W.I.T.C.H

5. Have you ever gotten into ship discourse?

I try not to. I have opinions, yes, and I like discussing them with friends, but I try not to make it anyone's problem - everyone will ship what they want to ship and find different dynamics compelling, so I don't think it necessary to crusade one way or another because one ship is superior to another. It's all very subjective.

6. Did you use to have any NOTP or have one currently?

I have quite a bit! Funnily enough I have some canon ships I absolutely dislike and can go off about whenever I catch a poor, innocent victim to listen to my rant.

But my general rule is that I don't like OT3s. In any fandom, in any form, it's just not for me at all. To make matters worse, I am a monoshipper at heart, which usually means that I have a dynamic/ship that I like with characters A and B, and it makes me lose interest in all the other configurations with them. So maybe not an active NoTP but very unlikely for me to read A/C if I committed myself to A/B.

Special shout out to Weilanzun, because this is my most recently acquired NOTP.

And to Batman/Talia Al Ghul which is my longest reigning one.

7. Who were the couple in the last fanfic you read?

Zhou Ying/Bai Ling from Tai Sui 🥺 my poor white half-demon, hopelessly devoted to his prince... And so few fics with them ;_;

8. Currently, do you have any OTPs?

Plenty. I don't abandon old ones, I just collect them together in my jar of ships and rattle it from time to time, to see how they sparkle together.

But from my most recent and long-term commitments: Weilan, Luolin, Heixie, Luo Qingeng/Jiang Yang (do they have a name???) and BatCat, forever and ever

9. Is there any couple that, to this day, you are extremely mad about not getting together?

Well, the story is a story, so as long as it makes sense that these characters do not end up together, then I am okay with it, that's what we have fanfiction for, right?

BUT

I am still not over that wedding stunt DC Comics pulled with BatCat. Months of teasing, of promising the wedding, the freaking wedding albums being released and then the WEDDING DIDN'T HAPPEN. They broke up instead because Batman has to be the dark, sad, lonely something something and you can't be a hero if you have a wife. 50 years and DC Comics is going backwards in this regard :/

10. Is there any ship you used to dislike but now you think they are kind of interesting?

Not sure? Nothing comes to mind. But I am very open to being pulled into/converted into ships as long as they are not on my black list, and even then I try to keep an open mind, in case something clicks.

11. Do you have any ship that, in the past, would've been considered normal but now you would be cancelled over?

Hah, a lot, because I got into shipping as a teenager. So reading romances about other teenagers felt normal and all but now I don't feel the need to revisit them.

12. What is your favorite crack ship?

Ha. Not today, Satan. One moment I am joking about a crack ship and the next I have 10k words written about it and like 3 sad headcanons and a shipping chart ready.

13. What is the couple you read the most fanfics about?

Oh wow, good question. If I like a ship, then I tend to read through the entire Ao3 tag of theirs, sometimes more than once because what if I missed some gem in the first go? So it would come down to the sheer numbers of fics, I think. So that would be either Sterek, Stucky or Eames/Arthur (fun fact: this is also the first fandom that introduced to me the concept of derivs)

14. What do most of your ships usually have in common?

Devotion. Very often the conflict between their feelings and their duties/ loyalty towards something they cared about before they met the other.

I like both sides of the ship to be competent at their respective fields and torn apart by their own choices and priorities. The 'I love you but do I love you enough to abandon everything I am'?. I like both answers more or less equally: both the 'yes, it's us against the world now' and 'I hope we won't meet on the battlefield' are set ups I enjoy immensely. But I also like smart-asses annoying each other into marriage one witty comeback at a time.

15. What you absolutely hate in a ship?

Imbalance of attachment. If the ship seems terribly one-sided, like one character is putting in all of the work and tries and tries, and tries while the other mercifully sometimes acknowledges them, then it's a no for me.

Same with the 'if you patiently wait for this person to like you, even though they told you 10 times they won't, then they eventually will' trope, like someone's love is what you earn through steadiness and hard-work.

I like both parts to be equally unwell about their partner, one way or another. They can be sickeningly domestic and gushing, or they can be crazy in that 'no one defeats him, but me!' kind of way, but they have to be in balance on the insanity scale. I like when characters grow into their relationship and both affect one another, falling more and more in love with each other as they go, but not when one person is a prize the other has to win/outwait/earn.

Thanks again for the tag, that was a nice bit of soul-searching there, very fun 👌😌

Tagging: @baiyubai , @babischlong-six , @mjsakurea, @mejomonster, @elenothar

[afewbitsandpieces]

Deltarune Text Project Update #3

(View WIP Text Project Here)  

After far too long, here’s another update to the Deltarune Text Project - 99% Complete edition!

To Recap:

- There is actually several pieces of dialogue that I have tried to get, but otherwise cannot get anymore because I don’t know the conditions, or some sort of internal data prevents me from getting it again:    - Kris’s name on 1st save file: If I remember right, this has to do with getting completion data on Chapter 1, so since I’ve finished Chapter 1 several times by now, I can no longer get this.    - Green File Select screen in Chapter 1: Essentially the same as the above.    - The last Weird Route Save Point dialogue won’t show up again, presumably because it’s already been completed once before.

There is also several pieces of battle dialogue that I’m not sure can actually be gotten, or I otherwise don’t know how to trigger them in-game:

- Rudinn:    - Rudinn is alright with not fighting. [Spare conditions met]

- Hathy:    - Hathy's beat slows. [Tired]    - Hathy is skipping beats. [Spare conditions met]

- Jigsawry:    - Jigsawry looks happy about its life. [Spare conditions met]

- Ponman:    - Ponman is sleeping soundly. [Sleepy]

- K. Round:    - K.Round looks weak. [Tired]    - K.Round's shuffle becomes lethargic. [Low HP]

- Rabbick:    - You and Ralsei warned Rabbick about Susie. The enemy went on guard... [Warned]    - Rabbick is now nice and clean. [Spare conditions met]

- Clover:    - Clover seems to be getting along with herselves. [Spare conditions met]

- Lancer 2:    - Huh? What was that? [After Susie blocks Lancer's ears from "The Final Blow of Kindness"]

- Rudinn Ranger:    - Rudinn Ranger seems totally flattered. [Spare conditions met]

- Head Hathy:    - Head Hathy blocked the way! [Encounter]    - Head Hathy's beat slows. [Tired]    - Head Hathy is skipping beats. [Spare conditions met]

- Jevil:    - JEVIL got more TIRED! [Hypnosis, if JEVIL is not sufficiently tired]

- Werewire:    - Werewire swung in! [Encounter]    - Werewire and Maus swung down like stringed superheroes! [Unused encounter with Maus]

- Ambyu-Lance:    - Ambyu-Lance and its pet appeared! [Encounter with ?]

- Maus:    - Smells like wood shavings. [Neutral]    - Maus would like to go to its favorite bistro in this marvelous city. [Neutral]

- Spamton:    - $VAULES$ (rarely)

- Swatchling:    - Please enjoy this complimentary shockwave. [Red]    - What? The lasagna has some kind of explosive in it? [Blue, rare]

IN ADDITION: Like the Undertale Text Project, there's now an “X. Miscellaneous” folder of interesting things in the game:   - Chapter & Route Stat Changes (’Power’ Section)   - Character Spells (’Power’ Section)   - Character Titles (’Power’ Section)   - Configuration   - ‘Everyman’ Sightings & Mentions   - Game Over Screens   - ICE-E Sightings & Mentions   - Items     - 1. Equippable Items     - 2. Healing Items     - 3. Light World Weapons & Armor     - 4. Throwing Away Items     - 5. Miscellaneous Items     - 6. In-Battle Descriptions     - X. Key Items (& Lancer)     - X2. Too Many Items   - Missing An Attack   - Sans’s Number   - Save Point Messages   - Toriel Phone Calls

If any of you feel that there’s something else that deserves it’s own folder in the Miscellaneous section, feel free to let me know!

With all that said, if there are any suggestions to make such as missing screencaps to get (and how to get them), folder naming suggestions, etc., feel free to let me know.

(By the way, if you’re [rightfully] wondering why this took so long, it’s a couple of things: one is that both chapters put together are surprisingly long, two is that I don’t have useful tools like an in-game script, save file editing, and room/event numbers like for Undertale, three is that so far I’m going at this completely alone instead of having a group effort, and four is that at one point I kinda just got burnt out and needed a temporary break after so many replays lol)

(By the way #2: For SOME reason, updating the Chapter 2 folder is claiming there’s “upload problems” with 9 out of the total 10593 files and I have zero idea which files those are, so if someone manages to find a spot where some images are clearly missing, please let me know!)

[invinciblerodent]

Now that I'm on this train and there's no getting off, from the name "Rook", I wonder if there will be something of a "chess" theme to the Veilguard characters/companions. As in, I wonder if the core companions are meant to represent a chessboard.

After all, in chess there are 8 non-pawn pieces, and we have 7 companions; together with the player character, it'd work as a basic layout very nicely.

Bishops in Dragon Age chess are called Mages (at least by Solas), and to me that'd be fairly self-explanatory-- but in this interpretation, there being three of them would also kind of lend itself to the supposition that one of them might be somehow different. (the one of them with a hidden agenda, perhaps?). (maybe Bellara being Dalish carries significance? does Neve's ice mage/"ice Queen" association carry more weight than initially implied??? Idk! Exciting tho!)

Rook would (very obviously) be a Rook/Tower piece: the clearest implication there to me is that they're supposed to be steady and powerful (and one of the primary defenses of the King piece, whoever that is). But, between the other "Rook" and the two Knights, there is some room for variation, as the Knight -to me, thinking as a bit of a romantic- is somewhat analogous our dear Grey Warden who is a charming figure who is nevertheless agile and steadfast, but between Harding, Taash, and Lucanis, so far I feel like there could be arguments to make for virtually any configuration.

The King and Queen pieces are kind of stumping me though, because my initial first thought is that the King could be a number of characters including Solas, Varric, or even the Inquisitor, but none of the companions really have that kind of history with the plot. Which either means that the metaphor had fallen apart, and there are 5 characters I'm trying to awkwardly fit into 2 roles that should only fit 4...

..... or that one of them is actually a pawn, meant to be sacrificed. One who could be masquerading as any piece.

(Even a Rook.)

Like this is maybe a bit far-fetched and it's obviously just pure speculation, but, based on the chess game Solas and Bull had played in the banters of Inquisition, it could potentially be an interesting little metaphor to explore here- if for nothing else, then for fanfic titles, lol.

[incarnadinedreams]

Getting to Know You - Tag Game

Oh yay, got tagged in a thingy!!! Exciting!!! Thanks @twilightarc-gm

Answer these questions and then tag nine people you want to get to know better.

1. Three ships: Ships that I consistently read in 2022-23

Gosh this one's hard because I still tend to revisit older/slowed down fandoms from time to time... and also am definitely a multishipper for most characters I like.

Since I've been wholly consumed by MDZS/Jiang Cheng brainrot right now it's mostly some flavor of Jiang Cheng/Happiness. I'm definitely an 'AllCheng, AnyCheng, NoCheng, WhateverCheng' enjoyer.

By volume (by availability on Ao3) that means ChengQing, Xicheng, Sangcheng, ChengXian but I'm down for others like ChengSu and ChengNing and various other configurations too! Somewhat limited by being mostly a novel fan so pairings that tend to be heavily based in CQL canon don't always resonate with me as much.

For non-JC ships I've recently gotten way more interested in Xiyao

Outside MDZS I've been occasionally hitting up some old favorites in less active fandoms like HakYona from Akatsuki no Yona, RoyAi & LingFan & AlMei (FMA), Reylo (Star Wars), Shadolin ot3 (Stormlight Archive), NejiTen (rip lol - Naruto... this is again a remnant of long ago, from the manga-is-still-being-published days... but if I stumble across one of them these days I'll still have a go)

2. First ship: probably Ling/Lan Fan or Roy Mustang/Riza Hawkeye (Fullmetal Alchemist)? Orrrr maybe Kyouraku Shunsui/Ise Nanao in Bleach (with the caveat that I was really into it when the manga was just the Soul Society arc (because I'm old) and not. Uh. Later. When uh. Yeah. Information from much much later in the manga killed that ship for me but you know. Thems the breaks. I'd already dropped the manga ages before that info was released so it was a bit of a shock when something stumbled across my path about it!)

3. Last song listened: "Woodbine" by Windhand playing currently!

4. Last movie watched: This was surprisingly hard to answer - I couldn't remember! I usually end up watching shows/miniseries or documentaries rather than regular movies.

5. Currently watching: I've been catching up the most recent season of the Great British Baking Show!

6. Currently reading: Oooh this is a loaded question... my 'currently reading' pile is too big... currently working my way through what volumes I have of the TGCF and 2HA official translations. Also rereading MDZS slowly and taking notes, just started that recently even though I'd planned to read all this over the holidays... and here we are, almost the end of January...

For non-danmei, 'The Goblin Emperor' by Katherine Addison which I'm struggling to get into/stick with which is surprising given the outstanding reviews/raving I see for it. I'm also somewhere in the middle of 'House of Chains' in the Malazan Book of the Fallen series but that's been lingering for a while now... not sure if that's a currently reading or an oopsie at this point...

7. Currently consuming: Mint tea while thinking about what I want for lunch! It's 2:40pm but I'm also lazy so I'll probably still be thinking about it an hour from now...

8. Currently craving: Honestly I have the biggest craving for some good bbq ribs, baked beans and potato salad but am also way too lazy to go grocery shopping + crank up the smoker (especially because it's just above freezing and rainy today!)...

[whentherewerebicycles]

time to declutter my brain by making some LISTS!!!! 

time available to me in the immediate future:

had amazing weekend in pittsburgh! am flying home tonight so will have about 5-6 hours of airport and flight time where i can work on whatever

i have only one meeting & one tiny work task on the agenda for tomorrow so i will have that entire day

wednesday morning is packed with meetings but i’ll be finished by 12 and then will have the rest of the day to run errands, pack, and do other last-minute trip stuff

thursday morning will be a bit of a mad scramble but then i will have 10-11 hours of sustained work time on the plane to use however i want

things i need to get done: 

pre-trip errands. i ordered a shitload of travel clothes & other stuff that all arrived this weekend, so i need to try everything on, decide what i’m taking with me, and drop off all returns before i leave. i also need to buy dog food, water plants, and pay some medical bills.

campus visit. i’ve gotten too far in the weeds with all the prep work and research, which is fine, like i needed to do that reading and thinking, but also now it’s time to step back from it a little bit and start thinking about the pieces i’m going to pull out for the actual talk. the sooner i can get a detailed outline together the less stressed i’ll feel, so i think i may spend tonight’s plane ride outlining by hand (since writing things out instead of typing helps me organize my thinking more efficiently). i want to think about several possible configurations for that hour, and then i also want to create a to-do list so i have a clearer sense of the stuff i need to prep or script in the next couple weeks.

i know i am going to put a lot of pressure on myself to do this “perfectly” or whatever, but i want to try to gently push back against that impulse. i am so prepared for this interview. the presentation doesn’t have to convey absolutely everything because i will have the entire day to answer questions and bring up things i want to mention. my goal is to not get lost into the details but to keep my messaging simple, direct, and compelling. i also read a bunch of articles in the chronicle this morning about how hard it is for universities to recruit and retain talented admin staff right now, and that made me feel a bit better about going into the interview. interviews are two-way evaluations and if they are interested enough in me for this role to invite me to campus, they are also going to be feeling some pressure to make this a positive experience and to convince me that this is the place i want to be.

IUI planning. i test tomorrow but kind of have a gut feeling this cycle didn’t work! i know i’ll be disappointed if the test is negative but i also think i’m so busy with other stuff that i’ll move on pretty fast and be ready to try again. i just need to reach out to my doctor before my trip to see what she thinks about squeezing something in around the travel and the campus visit - the timing will get a little hairy so it might not be worth it to try this month. we’ll see! but i have to do that before i leave as i need to know if i should take the meds with me & i also will need to set up my sister with the info to call the donor bank for me.

fic comments. lol my goal for this last cycle was to do 14 comments in 14 days and i only managed to do 4!! i will cut myself some slack here as when i set the goal i didn’t know about the job interview yet and didn’t anticipate that other stuff would fill all that open time. but i might try to do a few more on the plane tonight - maybe i can get to 7 at least. 

okay! there’s a lot ahead of me but honestly i think i did a ton of good work in march and that has prepared me to roll into a very busy april in a reasonably calm state of mind. i can handle everything that lies ahead. and wow i’m about to have a very cool travel experience too!! and basically two full weeks where  don’t have to think about my current job for even a second! i know i’ll probably be tired at the end of the trip but i hope it’s also a good brain break for me.

[mulcahhy]

still looking for more mash rp buddies! info under the cut to avoid tag clutter.

i’m 31 (be 18+ pls), in the eastern time zone (gmt -5), a frequent replier outside of life shenanigans (but try to communicate when that happens), and like paragraph / novella style writing but i usually don’t mind as long as story is progressing.

i end up forgetting tumblr exists so if anyone who has previously expressed interest would still like to rp, or if anyone new wants to, hmu on discord! my username is fawnamai. mostly looking for one on ones but not opposed to a small group sorta thing. you can message me here but i have proven to out of sight out of mind tumblr notifications hdkskskskeke.

ship wise i veer towards playing mulcahy in trapcahy, beejcahy, hawkcahy, and sidcahy - or any configuration of them all lol. can play almost anyone but i love my blorbo the most.

uhhh. i’m a big fan of omegaverse or pack dynamics? but that’s not necessary. i like canon or AU. hurt/comfort and angst are fun! also down with hybrids :3. we can talk about whatever!

[eldritchsurveys]

1211.

Does it irritate you when people are late for things, or do you not really care? >> If I made a plan with someone that had a specific time frame, then yeah, it irritates the fuck out of me if they don't show up on time or at least close to on-time (my personal grace period is about 15 minutes). If you have some shit going on like time blindness or whatever then please just don't make time-sensitive plans with me; those are the kinds of people I'd prefer to do something like "hey I'm going to be at xyz for 5 hours, wanna come through and hang out for a bit?" type of plans, where I set a time frame for myself where I can do my own thing and then I'm not just sitting around waiting for someone else.

Are you nervous about anything? >> I am not currently nervous about a specific thing, but anxiety is a part of the emotional cocktail I'm wading through right now. It's formless, directionless, the kind that just latches onto random shit as the day goes by as a justification for its existence.

Is your bed against more than one of your walls? >> It is in a corner, as I prefer a bed to be.

When was the last time someone chased you with a hose? >> This has not happened to me.

Have you ever burned yourself while taking something out of the oven? >> Maybe twice? It's not something that happens often because I am exceedingly cautious.

Do you think seeing a gay/lesbian couple in public is gross? >> LOL???????

Have you ever made out in your room? Last time? >> I have not.

Don’t you just hate running into people you know? >> Uh. No? Maybe this doesn't bother me nearly as much because I don't know anywhere near enough people to be running into them all the time. It's actually novel and interesting when it happens to me.

Who is the last person that disappointed you? >> Me. My body, more specifically. Have you ever felt like you hit rock bottom? >> Sure.

What are you going to have for dinner tonight? >> I have no idea. I don't even want to think about having to prepare food, I'm just so wrung out.

Do you think the last person you kissed cares about you? . Have you ever sold your old clothes instead of donating them? >> I have not. Does your favorite mall have more than one floor? >> I don't have a favourite mall. One mall in this city has two floors and the other has one.

Do you have a crazy aunt? . Do you like family get-togethers? . Have you ever been to an art museum? >> I have.

Would you kiss the last guy/girl that texted you? .

Have you ever injured yourself while you were under the influence of alcohol? >> I don't think so. Unless it was in a relatively benign way that I would also do sober, like stub my toe. Will you talk to the person you love/like tonight? .

Are you still with the person you fell hardest for? If not, do you ever miss them? .

Do you think you’ll kiss someone tonight? . Have you ever kissed anyone with the last name Jones? >> Don't think so. Is it possible to be ‘in love’ with someone, if they don’t love you back? >> I think the state of being "in love", specifically, is a shared state. It is an emotional bond, a mutual attachment. There are other (highly underuitilised) words for un-shared feelings, like limerence. I'm sure this is not a common viewpoint, but it definitely explains why I can't really say I've ever been In Love with anyone outside of the Configuration -- almost all of my meatspace entanglements have been... uneven.

How many times have you cried in the past week? >> Man... like 4 at least. I be cryin'.

If you could have one wish right now, what would it be? >> I don't know, man. Just gonna go with piles and piles of money.

[iheartlexihoward]

vulnerable (pt 5 ; the party) // fez

*･゜ﾟ･* summary: it's the first time you've seen fezco since that night, and things feel different. very different.

*･゜ﾟ･* pairing: fez x reader

*･゜ﾟ･* cws: alcohol, drugs, physical abuse mention, maddy being a no1 friend but possibly missing the mark a lawt

this is part 5 of this series! find part one here / masterlist

as i mentioned in the a/n of the previous part, 4 & 5 were actually all supposed to be the same chapter but i thought it was a lil too much going on so i preferred the format of splitting them ! i didn't want to keep anyone waiting for too long tho so here u go <3 the split is legit just for my personal configuration preferences LOL. i hope u are all still enjoying so far, and lmk ur thoughts <3

just to reiterate, my requests are also open for blurbs or anythin if anyone is interested :-)

------------------------------------------------------------------------

That evening, all the girls had crowded round into Maddy’s room to get ready and pregame a little. As you took a couple of shots, swiped gloss over your lips, and slipped into the outfit you’d spent a millennia choosing back home, you only had one thing on your mind.

You tried not to show how preoccupied you were, not wanting a repeat of earlier. You’d sang along to the songs on the way there, joined in on the laughter and conversations. And when you finally arrived, it took everything in you not to waltz your way out back where you knew he’d be.

Instead, you’d shown restraint. You’d poured a drink with Cassie, lounging on the couch talking to her and Lex until a tipsy Maddy tottered over. She grabbed you by the hand and pulled you up to dance, wrapping her hands around your neck as you both swayed and laughed.

“Spin me!” Maddy had to shout to be heard, glee evident in her tone and unabashed smile. You obliged, grinning at your friend’s antics. When she pulled away from you to twirl under your outstretched arm, you immediately saw him. It was just for a split second, and he was across the room, but you’d know that boy anywhere.

And he was looking right at you.

You smoldered under his gaze, Maddy once again blocking him from your line of vision but the feeling of being watched by him so fucking intense. You were hyper-aware of every move you made, whether it be a swing of the hips, bringing your drink up to your mouth, leaning forward to talk.

When the song ended, you couldn’t take it anymore. Prizing yourself from the girl’s arms, you made your way over to the counter where the liquor lay out and began to mix yourself a fresh drink. As you poured the alcohol, someone came and leaned on the surface to your left. Unable to stop yourself from immediately smiling knowingly, you looked up.

“Hi.” You blinked softly as you spoke.

Subconsciously, Fez returned the gesture, slowly fluttering his eyes. “Hey.”

“How you been?” The mixers were all lined up on a shelf just a little too high for you to comfortably reach. As you stretched to try and grab one, he didn’t even give you chance before turning around and getting it for you, fingers brushing against yours as he handed the bottle over. You thanked him and plucked his joint from him coquettishly, letting it rest between your lips as you used both hands to pour.

“Shit…” When you were done making your drink and had taken a couple of drags, you gave it back. “Better now I seen you, ma. A lot better.”

You turned around to join him in leaning up against the counter, moving slightly closer. Your arms were crossed as you took a sip of your drink, watching the crowd together. Maddy was still dancing (as she could usually be found), only now she’d roped Cassie into being her partner. The two girls moved to the heavy beat, Maddy insistent on putting on a show, weaving around her friend with grace despite the many drinks she’d taken back throughout the evening. You hadn’t drank like usual this particular night. You were definitely buzzed, but when the other girls were taking four, five shots back at Maddy’s, you were insistent on just sticking to a couple. You didn’t want to be too far gone, knowing that night was going to be the first time you saw Fez again.

“What ‘bout you? You been good?”

Your arms uncrossed and your right hand rested on the counter, edging closer to where his was leaning. Fez looked down upon feeling the eventual whisper of contact, your pinky stroking across the back of his hand before wrapping around his. “Better now I’ve seen you.”

As you both looked up, your gaze met. God, you wanted to kiss him, and in that moment it became increasingly difficult to give a single shit about your friends seeing. All you’d thought about the whole week was his lips, your bodies moving against one another, the way he’d pulled you into his lap with so much passion and desperation.

“M’ I gonna getchu to myself tonight?” He put the joint to his lips between a thumb and forefinger.

You smiled and squeezed his pinky. “You always do.”

Fezco looked down shyly, then moved his hand to encompass yours. His larger one slotted perfectly over, warm and consoling. Like home.

“See you later, Fez.” Touching his arm, you pulled away from the kitchen counter and started to make your way back out to your friends, shooting him one last look. “I’ll find you.”

Maddy near immediately collared you when she saw you walking across the dance floor, just trying to quietly make your way back to Lexi. Her arms were thrown around you and a firm kiss planted on your cheek — your hair stuck to the transfer of gloss, you shaking your head to try and free it.

“Where did you go?” she whined, comically spluttering when you accidentally whacked her in the face with your hair.

“Oh my God, sorry.” Giggling, you gestured behind you. “I was literally there. I was getting a drink.”

She gave you a look you couldn’t quite place — somewhere between disbelief and amusement. And then as soon as it appeared, it was gone. Maddy’s arms shifted from around your shoulders, her hand grabbing yours as she rocked back on her heels. “Come to the bathroom, I gotta pee.”

You allowed her to drag you through the hallway, scooting amongst the various people talking and making out against the walls. The nearest washroom was right down at the end, Maddy having to break into a trot around halfway there.

When you reached your destination, you took the initiative of closing and locking the door (not that Maddy would have been able to do it anyway, already tugging her underwear down her thighs and waddling quickly towards the toilet). You sipped at your drink slowly, averting your eyes as she finished up and went to go wash her hands.

“You gotta go?” she asked, turning round to grab a hand towel. You could, you guessed, earlier beverages starting to weigh on you a little. Setting your cup down on the side, you sat down as Maddy watched your face.

“Um… dude,” you chuckled nervously. “You gonna stand and watch me pee for weird sexual reasons, or…?”

“Oh my God, no.” She laughed, looking away. “I’m just… trying to figure you out right now.”

“What do you mean?”

“Bitch, have you seen how weird you’ve been acting recently?” The girl waved an immaculately manicured hand in your direction as you flushed and made your way over to the sink. “Like, I don’t know… just spacey. Different. And really fucking secretive. Like, for a while now.”

“I hadn’t noticed anything.” Your hands lathered, you rinsed them under the warm tap and picked up the towel Maddy had slung to the side.

“Well, we all have!”

“What, you’ve been talking about me?” You weren’t actually mad and you wanted her to know that — but you had to admit, the idea of your closest friends gossiping behind your back didn’t make you feel great.

“Yes! Not like that. Out of concern.”

You scoffed and picked your drink back up, touching her wrist. “Maddy, none of you need to be concerned about me. There’s nothing, I promise. Let’s go dance.”

You tried to tug her away, but she was steadfast. She looked at you for a moment tenderly, empathy clear on her face, like she was trying to reach something inside you. “If you’re seeing someone, we’ll all be so happy for you. Whoever that person is.”

Oh shit. You froze, opening your mouth to speak but nothing coming out. Did she…? Maddy continued, squeezing at your hand.

“It just makes me sad that you don’t feel like you can tell me things.” It almost looked like her eyes were beginning to water, but she blinked and it was gone. Not much could make Maddy ruin her makeup when the night was barely beginning. “I love you. If someone is making you happy, who gives a fuck what anyone else thinks? And you know I would never judge you. I don’t give a shit about any of that. Do you think any of the girls do?”

Okay. Gears were turning in your head. She could have been talking about you and Fezco, and she’d acted weird when you said you were in the kitchen earlier. It was very possible she’d seen something, or put two and two together from previous occurrences. But, it also sounded a lot like…

“Like, literally none of us would care. I promise.” Maddy dragged you in for a tight hug, and you hazily returned it, not exactly knowing what was going on. She pulled away and smiled, mouthing a ‘love you’. Your brain couldn’t compute a reply before she entwined her hand in yours, leading you back out the door and into the overpowering atmosphere of the main room.

So… either Maddy knew everything, or she thought you were gay.

Not that you cared if she did; and anyway, it only made you love her more how sweetly she’d handled the situation. You understood why she could come to that conclusion. Hell, if someone you knew was constantly hiding their phone screen, sneaking out to meet mystery ‘friends’, and had seemingly lost all interest in the opposite sex, you might even think the same. It meant a lot to you that she was worried you were in turmoil, and had wanted to privately talk to you about it. All of this sinking in, you realized that she probably was under the impression yours and Fez’s relationship was akin to his and Rue’s — close, yet deeply platonic. God, if she knew.

It had been around an hour or so when you decided to go and hunt for Fez again. Maddy hadn’t brought up the odd conversation once; in fact, she’d acted like it hadn’t even happened at all. You decided the best course of action was just to try and brush it off. You’d neither confirmed nor denied a single thing, whatever she was actually pertaining to. You hadn’t even said anything back to her. Either way, it seemed good enough for her just knowing she’d said her piece, given you her full support. People didn’t always give her enough credit. While her choices as a girlfriend were sometimes questionable, as you grew closer you’d come to realize she was one of the best friends anyone could have.

You’d slipped your bag onto your shoulder and rifled through for your phone, checking to see if you’d received anything. It was little disheartening when there was nothing, but nonetheless you made your way through the sliding glass doors and out to the pool area. Hayley was a girl in Cassie’s grade, and to say her parents were affluent would have been an understatement. The outside area was massive, with a large poolside patio. Past that was an even bigger lawn area, surrounded by foliage.

There were plenty of areas set up for guests to lounge around in, smoking and drinking. Outside furniture at parties was always a Fezco-magnet, and you often found yourself loitering around there waiting for him to turn up.

It was a little difficult to see in the dimly lit area, and there were quite a few people around. But after a quick scan of the crowd, you spotted him. He was seated away from everyone, slouching on an outdoor sofa with a foot up on the low table in front.

“Since when do you drink Bud?” you teased, trudging up to him and flicking the bottle as you took a seat.

Fez automatically tilted his beer up to look at the label, then broke into a toothy grin. “Uh… I’on know. Today?”

You sidled closer to him slightly, tucking your left leg underneath you and leaning on the back frame of the sofa. “What you been up to tonight?”

“Shit, jus’ chillin’.” It didn’t take a detective to figure out he was extremely high, dragging his words out and pausing before every answer. You always found it cute, the way his eyes drooped and his movement became slow. “Watched you dancin’ a little bit. Enjoyed that.”

Laying your head in the crook of your elbow, you flushed and giggled like a preteen. “That’s really embarrassing for me, Fez.”

“Nah, nah. Girl, you looked fuckin’ good… too fuckin’ good, like… Goddamn.”

You pulled at the arm of the colorful sweater he had on, playing with the fabric between your fingers. Fez moved his arm to rest the beer on your bare leg, a gesture sending goosebumps through you for reasons other than the cold bottle. Stroking the index finger curled around it before poking at the tip with your own, you looked down at his hands. You’d always liked them — they were pretty. Strong. Fezco met your playful gesture, toying with your pointer finger back.

“You been busy?” You looked up at him. He contemplated your words for a while before answering, looking off at the house, up into the stars.

“Nah, man.”

Pausing in anticipation, you leant forward subconsciously. “That’s it? Just, ‘nah’?”

Fez licked his lips then took a sip of his beer, gently making sure your hand was out of the way before he moved. He rested his drink in the same place on your thigh when he was done. “Nah, I ain’t come here to do that shit.”

“Then… why are you here?” Ouch. That had sounded much harsher than you meant it. You scrambled to cover yourself. “Fuck, that came out so wrong, I’m sorry. You know what I mean. Usually you, like, only come to these things to make money.”

He brought his gaze up to your face, eyes raking over your features, sparkling in the far-away lights of the party. “That ain’t the only reason.”

His stare felt like it was burning a hole through your skin, but you held fast. Your voice was velvet when it came out of your mouth. “What else?”

“Shit…” Fez smiled tenderly and turned away, leaning back on the couch. “Don’t make me say it.”

He’d come that night for you. That’s why he was sitting out back on his own, sipping on a beer he didn’t want and smoking himself into another dimension. Fezco had come to a random party where he knew no-one, didn’t like any of the music played, and wasn’t selling a thing. Just to see you.

It had gotten to the point where he always did. The usual money was a bonus.

Silently, you slipped your hand into the hem of his sleeve to graze your fingernails over his wrist. It reminded him of that night, when you’d given it a reassuring squeeze. He didn’t realize until you became closer, when you started feeling comfortable enough to provide him with these small affirmations, how much he adored being touched. It was something he avoided at all costs for years, every bit of contact making him want to scrub himself clean. It reminded him of his childhood. Of being hit.

But then you came along, and you were so soft, so gentle; he couldn’t help but melt. The first few times, he knew he’d flinched away a little, and was worried it would deter you. It didn’t, luckily for him, and over time the anxious feeling whenever he felt your touch began to dwindle. The night he came over was the first time he’d felt brave enough to reach out first.

“Listen…” Fezco’s head was leaning against the back of the sofa as he turned to face you. “Even if I wanted to… I ain’t got shit right now.”

“…What do you mean?” You circled your fingers over his skin, working in tandem.

“I jus’… don’t really got shit. I got fuckin’ raided. Lil’ while ago.”

“You got raided? The fuck, Fez, why didn’t you tell me?”

Fez looked down and rubbed at the side of his head, sucking his teeth. “Shit, girl… you got better things to do than worry ‘bout me.”

He was half-joking, but his voice held such an air of sadness it pained you. You shifted closer, so that your left leg was resting on top of his.

“Do you think I don’t worry about you anyway? Whatever you do or don’t tell me, I worry. I worry because I care about you.”

Swallowing thickly, he studied your hand moving steadily under his sleeve and plucked the beer from himself. His wrist moved upwards, allowing him to capture your digits with his newly freed ones. He fluttered his eyes closed, taking a deep breath.

“I had to do some bad shit as of late… you understand?” he began, voice low. “Shit I think might be sendin’ me straight to fuckin’ hell. ’N’ I don’t think imma good person anymore.”

“You are a good person. Always. The best.” You brought your free hand up to rest on his forearm. “Fez, what did you do?”

“I can’t tell you. ‘Cuz if I tell you… you might never look at me the same. And I can’t fuckin’ deal with that.”

“Nothing could change how I see you. You can tell me.”

He just shook his head slightly and tried to form a response, mumbling out something resembling, ‘jus’ can’t’. Your thumb swiped across his arm and you squeezed his hand ever so slightly.

“It’s okay. It’s what I always say… you don’t have to tell me anything. But I’m here. Always. And I care about you more than fucking life, Fez.”

Nodding slowly, he looked at you so sincerely you wanted to cry. He was in one of his moments where he was struggling to vocalize how he felt, but you knew what he was saying. Me too. Care ‘bout you more than anything.

A quiet moment was shared, you leaning in to bump your head against his, noticing a fallen eyelash on his cheek. Murmuring out a, ‘wait stay still’, you gently picked it off and held it out in front of his lips, a glint in your eye and smile tugging at the edges of your mouth. “Make a wish.”

Fez paused. “That you’ll come home wit’ me, baby.”

He blew.

[bthump]

What are your top 10 favorite ships ever? It doesn't have to be ordered but I'd like to see a ranking if you have one.

ty for asking! This is tentative and subject to change, but I’ll give it a shot based on what I’m feeling rn. Fair warning, I have pretty basic taste in fandoms lol, Berserk is kind of an anomaly for me, I usually get into fairly popular/classic stuff.

1. griffguts (berserk)

I’m putting this in the number one spot because I’ve been consistently into griffguts longer than any other fandom at this point, and I still keep coming up with things to say about them, and also the first fanworks I’ve ever posted publicly have been for Berserk so that has to count for something too. Plus they hit like almost every one of my favourite tropes, they really are the ideal ship.

2. fraser/ray v (due south)

One of those ships that’s not always at the forefront of my mind, but always periodically comes back to catch me off guard with how much I love it. I just love their kinda lowkey fucked up dynamic - Ray is self destructively loyal to Fraser and Fraser is self destructively loyal to his own sense of duty, and it’s something that’s legit explored in interesting ways on the show. But at the same time they just have great chemistry too. Also it’s like my number one comfort fandom.

3. hannigram (nbc hannibal)

Another ship that’s practically perfect in every way. Hannibal is the ideal show for me, and hannigram is just so good. Friends to enemies to lovers, corruption, incredibly together dude ruining his life for love, compelling shifting power dynamics... and the post season 3 fandom was just fantastic for a while, there were/are so many good writers into it and after season 3 they actually often wrote the ship they way I liked it. Plus it’s unsurpassed when it comes to funny tumblr posts.

4. wangxian (mo dao zu shi/the untamed)

More of a recent ship but one of the most fun fandom experiences I’ve had in a while. Tons of great fic, excellent dynamic, delightful canon in all its various forms and adaptations, and frankly, the f/f AU porn fic subgenre has been a fucking godsent oasis in the good f/f porn desert, it would be a top ship just for that. I would highly urge anyone who wants more tropey and unabashedly kinky f/f to check it out.

5. xena/gabrielle (xena: warrior princess)

Xena is another perfect show and Xena/Gab is one of those solid classic ships that’s just incredibly fun to watch. They’ve got so much chemistry, everyone involved in the show was on board with pushing the romance til it didn’t even count as subtext as far as I’m concerned, they had the range to go fun and light, epic and romantic, delightful and tropey, and/or dark and messed up depending on the season or canon AU variation lol. There’s a reason it’s the prototype for like 75% of lesbian romances written since.

6. doctor/master (gay configurations only) (doctor who)

It’s got it all! You want bitter exes who still pine for each other with that classic frenemies dynamic? Three/Delgado. You want villain menacing wide eyed ingenue? Five/Ainley. You want enemies living in weird domestic bliss? Shalka. You want beloved iconic hero fucking over all his friends and the entire Earth for mass-murderer dick? Ten/Simm. You want fluffy romance with ominous foreshadowing? Theta/Koschei. And that’s not even getting into all the fanon and cross-era configurations. It even has its own canonical f/f variation, and even though they weren’t allowed to actually interact on the show there’s at least some fic.

7. hawkeye/trapper (mash)

I’m revisiting this rn so it’s my current thing lol and these two are just wildly fun to watch together. The strength of the gay reading rivals any fandom classic but while most of those classics are like 90% affection and chemistry and 10% jokey gay references, Hawk/Trap is 90% affection and chemistry and 110% jokey gay references - smug ones, not disparaging ones, because the point was mainly to make fun of The Man lol. It’s a very entertaining vibe.

8. d/leon (pet shop of horrors)

Idk what it is about this ship but it’s sent me on multiple wild goose chases through the wayback machine trying to resurrect old fic, I’ve read a ton of the fic multiple times, I’ve read premises I usually wouldn’t be into, idk. It compels me. The ascerbic frenemies who coparent a kid together vibe is just too good.

9. jeeves/wooster (pg wodehouse books)

This is one of those fandoms that just has a lot of high quality fic that’s a lot of fun to read, and I appreciate that. Like, the source material is all about a dude’s valet saving him from accidentally getting engaged like 50 times so you know it’s gotta be homoerotic, and it is delightful that way. But really everyone mimicking PG Woodhouse’s prose to varying degrees in fic is always just an enjoyable reading experience.

10. victuuri (yuri on ice)

This is a tough call lol but man they really were the perfect ship at the perfect horrible time. I had my eye on the show while it was airing but I didn’t check it out until episode 8 - not 7, because while a kiss was great news I wasn’t too into the assumed dynamic of awkward anxious skater/flirty confident seductive coach. Episode 8 was when dom Yuuri made an appearance and that’s when I was like oh okay this is the fandom for me after all lol. Which was great because I got to watch the episode 10 twist in real time and that was one of the most fun fandom experiences ever.

[randomidiocyncrazies]

Tagged by @enbyboiwonder (rather, i saw their open invitation and tagged myself)

Rules: Post the names of all the files in your WIP folder regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous.

Let people send you an ask with the title that most intrigues them and then post a little snippet of it or tell them something about it! And then tag as many people as you have WIPs. (You can make your own post or reblog this one!)

i have... a lot of concepts that i, at some point in time, thought interesting. some are quite recent, while others have been on the back-burner for YEARS (like, more than a decade ago). the list of my WiPs are under the cut, sorted by fandom/category (such as original writing and tabletop rpg projects) in alphabetical order.

some of them i have absolutely no intention to resume working on, but for the others... who knows? maybe inspiration will strike outta the blue—i did recently finish up a fic for a fandom that i thought i’ve left for good...

tagging: @obstinaterixatrix, @dork-empress​, @dragonomatopoeia, @den-liner and anyone else who wants to do it, consider yourselves tagged—i’m always interested in hearing about the creative projects of other folks! (also, no pressure if you’d rather not participate)

2.43

2.43 Pyre AU

Odaoki 5+1 get-together fic

Odaoki names

Attack on Titan

My TOTALLY REAL Girlfriend (Who’s Gonna Live in Wall Sina With Me)

SnK background swap

Dangan Ronpa

ishimondo: courtship for fools (+perspective shift)

GEAR Fighter Dendoh

on legacies

definition configurations

common knowledge

Homestuck

alpha kids food headcanons

Sessionswap

Imperial Uncle

mid-autumn festival

Merchants Mei Yong and Zhao Cai vs corrupt officials???

JJBA

josuyasu home

josuyasu first time

KHR

Gokudera Asuka

MDZS

LingYi 鼓瑟鳴琴

Octopath Travelers

tentative old flames

Stonegard Historian/Sculptor

“alfyn had never let us down”

Original stories

Academy of Verona

Storytale Cycle

Rosen Circle Chronicles

in the cradle of the ocean

Persona series

P2+P4 lift the fog

P3 hidetoshi+keisuke go go go

P4 Twin Dragons fic 

P4 talk of the town 

p4 reborn as personas

p4 background swap

p4 epsilon

p4 while you were sleeping

P4 Adult IT AU (developed with @obstinaterixatrix)

Sk8 Infinity

lol crackship

Tabletop RPG

fifteen years after the passing of hero adair

last rite of the sunset superstars

My secrets are my weapons

olden days, golden years

party of bards

Rivals 2 Lovers

this is [not] a place of honor

[mercurytrinemoon]

On synastry and how to approach it

If you follow me you may have noticed few of my posts where I'm fixating on the fact that I don't know a certain person's birth date. And I said I'm sensing a nice Venus-Mars connection and honestly now that I think about it, I feel like Jupiter is heavily underlined in here as well. So that made me think of synastry a lot (not that I don't think about it on daily basis) and it made me want to elaborate a bit. Also because I see this weird approach where people single out certain aspects and turn them into "make it or break it" kind of deal and that is just wrong.

Actually it's similar with natal charts. The difference here is obvious - you have two individuals which means double the options in which way the energy may go and more potential for aspects to cancel each other out. So while natal interpretations of, for example, planets in the houses will resonate with you, all the black and white interpretations of synastry house overlays belong in the dumpster imho. And I knooow, I knoooow, one of my first posts was about house overlays. It was very generalized one and I did disclaim to take the entire chart into consideration. But sometimes I see these descriptions where people say "oh my god Venus in the 8th house! This is highly sexual aspect!" But what if none of the people have their Mars nor Venus activated, maybe except for a Venus-Saturn square that puts a big dump on the whole thing. Also, this may as well indicate taking care of shared resources (because that's one of the main themes of the 8th). Besides - and that's my personal take - overlays are less important than aspects between planets unless a) you’re putting a stellium in someone’s house b) it's about angles, because having the same planet as someone's ascendant is a big thing and I can guarantee you that most of the people you create bonds with will have that configuration with you.

Speaking of which, the type of people you attract is highly dependant on your chart. Angles are important but so are aspects and planet placements. I'll give you an example based on my own natal chart, because, obviously, I know myself well and I pay attention to charts of the people I come in contact with. As an Aquarius rising, I attract a lot of Aqua personal planets, Leo risings and people with personal planets in Leo - surprisingly not a single Leo Sun. As a Sagittarius dominant person, most of my friends are Gemini Moons or Sag Moons. Surprisingly I only befriended one Gemini Sun in my life + my belowed dog who was a Gemini. My Aries Moon makes me weak for Aries Suns. Sun is opposite Mars (5th house) - it, again, points to Aries (and Scorpios as well). Dominant fire element and Aries in the 3rd (easy communication) helps here a lot. Having Sagittarius in the 11th (house of friends) and Jupiter in the 7th (house of partnerships), I tend to be friends with other Sadges BUT that Jupiter in the 7th makes me very attracted to Pisces as well. So DO take classic rulership into consideration!

That leads me to another point - modalities. I have a lot of mutable energy so I love other mutable energies. SQUARES omg, especially in romantic/sexual relationships. They do bring tension but hear me out. You need trines and sextiles but squares bring spice. I can guarantee you that having a flowing Mars-Venus contact will give you a pleasant feelings for one another, easiness in communication and a natural synchronicity, but it's the square that will make you wanna rip each other's clothes off. Soooo... I mean, whichever you prefer I guess. Squares are also stimulating, with trines the energy flows nicely, squares bring interest... it's a different element, but the same modality... a perfect mix to make you drawn to the other person. It's similar yet intriguing. Another example, as a Sag Venus my tastes concerning arts and music should clash with a Pisces Venus - that’s what a textbook definition will tell you - but surprise, surprise, half of my favourite artists have Venus in Pisces.

Now with oppositions it's a completely different thing. I think they work wonderful when there are yin-yang planets involved. As I mentioned earlier, as a Sagittarius Sun I love Gemini Moons. They compliment each other. The thing is, with opposites you either get each other or you just pass each other. So it fluctuates. I've noticed that especially when there's the same planet involved. Two people having Mercury opposition will get each other so well they will finish each other's sentences one day and then completely miss the mark the next. Like two vehicles driving in opposite directions.

Trines aren't 100% amaaaazing. I know many people who, like me, have inner planets in fire signs and our values, ways of thinking and approach to certain issues are completely different. We do express them in the same manner though, which is by being loud lol. Trines also bring laziness so if you have too many of them the relationship may just fizzle out. Sextiles on the other hand are so underappreciated. Air fuels fire and water nourishes the earth - it’s way more interesting than a trine where both signs are in the same element, imho. Some astrologers will tell you sextiles are "weaker" but that's just stupid. They’re just as important, okay?  

Sometimes you don't even have to have an actual aspect. Whoa, I know, mind-blown. But I see that constantly. Obviously having planets in a tight aspects is very important but let's say you have Aquarius Venus at 5° and the other person has Sun in Aqua at 20°. They don't make an aspect but it's the same sign, therefore you're going to express these energies in the same manner - which makes you compatible (tho I don't like that word). Now the smaller the orb, the more significant the aspect is. I've read somewhere that the aspect with the tightest orb kind of represents the theme of the relationship - I haven't been able to really analyze this theory tho. When it comes to orbs overall, Alexander Von Pronay is suggesting to use aspects up to 7°. I'd do that and then look at aspects under 2° to really see which energies are stronger. Liz Greene said that if you're feeling an aspect, even if the orb is wider, well, you're feeling it and it's there. I suspect it may depend on what energies you're sensitive to. If, for example, your chart ruler is Venus, you may feel Venus aspects more. And then with Uranus, Neptune and Pluto I'd say up to 2°.  

What's actually awesome are so called double whammies. It's when the same two planets are aspected both ways. So A person's Sun is trining B's Venus and B's Venus is sextile A's Sun. Or A's Moon is conjunct B's Sun and B's Sun is opposite A's Moon. I like double whammies cause they provide mutuality. People often ask "wHo FeeLs iT mORe????". First of all, there's no clear answer to that because everyone's different and their charts are different and some respond to the energy one way and some, other. That's why I like to ask people: well, how do YOU feel about that aspect (if you, of course, know astrology well enough to pinpoint the energy). But with double whammies you basically exchange the same aspect so, hopefully, in 99%, it will be mutual.

What I also love is having the same aspect natally. Let's say you have a Mars-Mercury trine natally and the other person has it conjoined. That is awesome. It's like going through the same experiences in life and going "yeah! I went through that too! I understand!" Better yet if then those planets also make an aspect in the synastry chart. It's great. You're going to vibe so much.

About mutuality... A few weeks ago I was watching a livestream from Nina and Shaina from Party Trick Astrology (love those girls) and they were talking about synastry so I asked them a question related to these things cause, you know, I bet they've seen hundreds of charts and I'm always curious about other people's observations. So I asked about mutuality and one of them gave an example of a girl whose Venus was beautifully aspected by a guy and the guy's Venus not being aspected at all. And how this, for example, pointed to the guy being into the girl but not vice versa. And I thought that's interesting because I'd assume it would be the other way around. Her planets didn't activate his Venus so he shouldn't be into her romantically. And I actually experienced that myself one time. I had this Aqua friend and had literally zero aspects to my Venus. Not even a semi-sextile, not even a quincunx, not even a wide generational planet connection. And I didn't see him through these romantic lens. So I guess there are no rules to this. OR it’s all about projection (which btw happens a lot in astrology). That's why I like to look at synastry charts and just get the overall vibe. 

Now with that being said, the shocker. YOU DON'T HAVE TO HAVE ASPECTS WITH THE OTHER PERSON AT ALL. I know, a bummer. Here we, astrology junkies, are in the lookout for the perfect synastry chart but as I look at charts of celebrity couples I often see them having no Sun connections, no Venus or Mars connections, lame Moon aspects etc. That is indeed disappointing. That's why I was so stoked about that Britney-Justin synastry. Because I don't see connections like that one between all the "it” couples of today.

So I guess... astrology is bullshit... Nah, just kidding. But it is complex. Sometimes it’s quality over quantity. And you should approach synastry as a whole, just feel it out, you know? And I’ll leave you with that for today because it’s getting long.

[simlicious]

Status update

 Configuring my new PC takes much longer than I thought, but I have my Sims game stuff sorted out :) I can create new patterns and my ts3 CC testing Any Game Starter profile is active and working. Though I wanted to cut out some CC and had to switch some hairs around, so some of my models got a little upgrade. (I ended up putting all hairs back in after all, because I need to sort through them in a different profile instead of just taking out a bunch without knowing how they look, but oh well.)

I also stumbled upon a beautiful flower texture on which I had worked on in the past but then forgot about, so I finished it. Really lovely daisy petals. And those glitter stripes are so much fun! Sims 4 is also working, new CC and all. I found a lovely surprise in my paypal account today - I am very grateful to the kind person who donated for my website the other day - thank you!!! I’m almost halfway to covering my website costs this year. Oldies but goodies! Since I do not have any old patterns in my testing save, I haven’t actually seen my published patterns for quite some time, so I installed them all in my new sims 3 play savegame. There are some gorgeous patterns that I totally forgot about in there - for example, I really enjoy having the rainbow-colored woods from my wood pattern collection #2 in my game! That wood collection is one of my favorite collections I made. It’s also interesting to see how I developed my skills over the years and I think my patterns have definitely increased in quality. (Some old ones actually make me cringe, but that was to be expected. If anyone ist still playing ts3 in 5 yeas, maybe I’ll have overhauled a few of the older ones by then LOL) I’m especially proud of the quality of the patterns I am currently finalizing! I think you’ll love them.

[menswearmusings]

My Guide to Denim and Chambray Shirts

Photographer Glen Allsop recently posted images of the limited-edition art book of his photos for my favorite Eidos season, Il Cuore di Pescatore (spring/summer 2015). That season, Eidos made the perfect chambray shirt. With the signature “Marcus” collar (a big, wide cutaway with a tall collar band), beautiful mother of pearl buttons, in the perfect…

Read more at Menswear Musings

[ethereal---spirits]

For about a month I had posted on Twitter some translations from the interview with MALICE MIZER that was in Rock and Read 083. Since it would take a lot of time and work to make the whole interview readable to everyone, and because I am not a trained translator nor do I get paid to do this, I decided not to put the whole interview online, but to share some of the more interesting quotes. I’ve decided to put those quotes here, along with a little more. The formatting is the way it is because there were tweets with that character limitation, since I was doing one tweet a day. So here is a bit from the Rock and Read interview with Közi, Mana and Yu~ki. 

Közi: (on the R&R magazine cover) "I was surprised. (Hmm, why this timing !?) Last year, I did a 25th anniversary live and it will be released on DVD, but it wasn't like I was (with a revival!)."

What influenced Deep Sanctuary VI? Mana: "To put it in a nutshell, I played the MALICE MIZER "au revoir" instrumental at the finale (of DSV). Then Közi says "Motto". . .Then there was a great chorus of (Au Revoir) from there.

Közi: “The live is over, and three of me, Mana and Yu~ki are on the stage for a curtain call. Just when it was time to go back and forth, the background music of (Au Revoir) flowed. At that time, there was a microphone in front of me. Then I suddenly said “Motto (more)”, got off the stage and then that great choir happened.

Mana: “As Közi said, it was not a preparation, it was a coincidence.

Yu~ki: “Everybody sings (Au Revoir), l listened on the side, together, three people. . . . It was certain that warm feelings had started to grow at that time. When I said (I want to meet everyone's expectations), I felt that the feeling was OK. It was a suggestion from Mana-chan, that was the basis for more, but there was no reason to refuse it (that's right).”

Yu~ki: “How to make new things, I think that (leader) Mana had professional ideas. But Mana told me "Közi and Yu~ki, you are fine artists. Do what you want to do."

R&R: "Was your idea Yu~ki to fly in the air at the Shibuya Public Hall performance just before the major debut?"

Yu~ki: "That's right. I was also in charge of theater, so I made a lot of effort in directing."

Regarding self-production in the 90's Mana: "I had never thought of getting someone to pull me on (label or such). I was developing activities by being able to complete by myself, so I was able to go alone with them by myself."

About what MALICE MIZER was able to complete by themselves and their communication with each other Yu~ki: "I think the relationship between the members was good. We went to eat curry often." Közi: "Clam ramen and so on."

Mana: "I did not lock the house I lived at that time, so some members came in and out. It was a time when there were no mobile phones, so I came in without a foreboding. Roadies also came well. KAMIJO talked about it at DSVI MC, all roadies lived within 5 minutes of my house." Mana: "I can't think right now (lol). The members came on their own, there was no shelter and there was no privateness, like it was their own home. It wasn't too large for a 1K room, and I was impressed that I had lived like that." Közi: "...It was a octopus room (lol).

R & R on Mana's apartment: "Even though the decor is Gothic and decorative, it was not an elegant life (lol). Mana:"It was not. It can be said that everyone gathered around one kotatsu." Yu~ki: "(imagewise) Can you say kotatsu?" Mana ". . . (lol)"

About Deep Sanctuary VI Mana: "This time, I wanted to reproduce the (active) time as much as possible." Yu~ki: "This time, there was a direction of (festival) as a major premise. I wanted to make it a stage that everyone can enjoy, even for those who have never seen MALICE MIZER"

R&R: "In terms of reproduction, Sakura was the only image of Kami." Közi: "I was completely haunted." Yu~ki: "I was surprised at the time of rehearsal.... He put the orange hair extension and wore the cap backwards as well, as Kami did it. That was Sakura-kun."

On how Sakura must have researched Kami's appearance and playing style Mana: I think maybe. I didn't ask for something (we want it this way) for us. There were a lot of suggestions from Sakura, and for example, the chorus mic. He said that he wanted to reproduce the way of Kami

On Kami's drum kit being used for DSVI Közi: The drum settings and tuning were completely the same as Kami. Mana: We also used the drum set from Kami. Közi: That's right. The drums were taken (from Ibaraki). I went to Kami's alma mater to borrow them.

About what Sakura said about Kami at DSVI Yu~ki: "...I didn't know that those two men had such a deep love of brother and brother, and I was not able to measure how much thought Sakura had put into the songs. I was able to play comfortably just because I really appreciated it." Közi "...Sakura's love for Kami is really great. I think that I was really looking at that kind of awareness. It was also a suggestion from Sakura to post an article on Pearl's homepage and to make a Kami drumstick and put it for sale. And in fact, moved it towards realization."

R & R: "What did you not do? Did you ever think about it?" Yu~ki: "As former director, I have a unique world view of MALICE MIZER. There is a feeling that I wanted to show. I wanted to fly and fly (lol)." Közi: "You will fly away from the stage. (Thank you!) What? (lol)."

On the MALICE MIZER 25th Anniversary Deep Sanctuary VI and Yu~ki not getting to fly   Yu~ki: "But this time it was just a festival. It was a direction of having roadies sing and having fun playing old songs."

R & R: "The MC of Kozi and Yu~ki was also surprising. At that time (in the past), non-vocal members had little talking on the stage." Yu~ki: "There was a struggle, but it's a festival (lol)." Közi: "It was hard! We talked about doing our best (lol)!" Yu~ki: "I think the roadies also spoke well, even though I have my current position." Közi: "You prepared a lot of episodes. But one thing I thought was that the roadies were speaking of good episodes of Mana and Yu~ki. Even though with me, there were no good stories (lol)."

About the MALICE MIZER 25th Anniversary Deep Sanctuary VI roadies' MCs Mana: "I think it was good because I could hear quite a few secret stories that only the roadies knew. I did not ask what they would talk about in advance."

R&R: "Different stories appeared for the two days. It was not informed in advance what kind of episodes would come out?" Mana: "Yes. So, I also heard many for the first time, there were a lot of surprises during the shows."

About filming the MALICE MIZER DSVI DVD Mana: "The design on the final day was almost untouched, but in fact the video shot is only on the final day. I had no plan to film, so on the first day I didn't make room for the camera. I mean, I really didn't want to have two days."

Why only one night Mana: "I wanted to make it a one night legend. After all, when it comes to two days, the contents you did on the first day will be spoiled (for the second day). Because of that (25th anniversary overnight shock), I felt strongly that I wanted to do one night."

Why add a second night? Mana: "However, I heard that many people were drawn to the lottery, so I did it for two days. As a result, it was good to do it for two days. Many people came from afar."

R&R: "There were also customers from overseas. Have you made any changes from the configuration you originally thought by having two days?" Mana: "At first, (Ma Cherie) was not planned."

Mana: "In fact, it was planned to end with (Au Revoir) that I did before (Ma Cherie). Two years ago, the audience moved in response to the excitement of the chorus of (Au Revoir), so I was thinking of closing with (Au Revoir). At first, I thought that it would also be singing."

Mana:  "The day I entered the studio with Kozi and Sakura, while aligning the sequence and checking for problems, I put together songs one after another. At that time, there was no (video) image that the song could enter (Au Revoir). So I quickly decided to make it vocal-less."

Mana: “With (Au Revoir), we might have streamed a live video at the Yokohama Arena on the back screen. At first it was not on the schedule. If you watched Közi and Sakura playing in a rehearsal, I really want to link a special song for us (Au Revoir) with Kami. So, I thought that I wanted to synchronize the live performance with the video that Kami was playing at the Yokohama Arena. Then the production side is...When synchronizing sound and video, the originally planned time changes... However, the result (playing Au Revoir with no singer) worked well, and I thought it was good to have that direction.” 

I hope to have a little more tomorrow. The talk about the future that I did not put on Twitter.