#also I know they only talked about Ashton losing their clothes but I think we should just assume that Fearne was also naked

[essektheylyss]

I will be honest, I'm gonna be thinking about the Ludinus simulacrum faceplanting into the lava and cackling to myself about it for weeks.

[cass1opi4]

PART 2 OF CLOSE AS STRANGERS RIEGHT NEOW.

close as strangers part II - ashton irwin

an ashton irwin x reader

she/her pronouns (requested)

✦ ─ ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ ─ ✦

TWENTY-THREE MISSED CALLS FROM: no caller id.

ONE HUNDRED AND THIRTY FIVE UNREAD TEXT MESSAGES FROM: A.Irwin

the musty glass of water sat on her bedside table, as it had done for the past three days. the unbearable sadness that she’d felt before ashton had returned to her body, her bones aching with every movement, her body heavy.

she didn’t know why she felt such a way, she broke up with him. she’d understand the depression if it was the other-way around, but she had no reason to break over her own decision, right?

basking in the misery of things that only you could’ve done to yourself is the worst form of torture anyone could ever put themselves through.

INCOMING CALL: cliffocondaᯓᡣ𐭩

she let it ring, staring at the phone as she hesitated on her next action, her teeth sinking into her lip.

she couldn’t ignore her best friend, not now, not ever. honestly, she needed him. everything hurt and not even she could fathom why, michael could fix that. michael always fixed that.

“hello?” his soft voice spoke, waiting patiently for an answer he never got, something he was used to. he’d always known how awful y/n was at phone calls. “you there?” silence once again was all he was met with “bunny, i need you to talk to me. when did you last hear from ash?”

her heart jumped to her throat at the mention of the name, of course michael didn’t call to ask if she was okay - ashton was a better friend to him. ashton was more hurt. “why? is he okay?”

“i don’t know. it’s- that’s why i called you, last i heard you guys were fine, now ash is missing. only context clue here is that yesterday he told luke he wanted to make things up with you, whatever that means?”

“fuck me.” she sighed, dragging her hands across her face, eyes nervously darting to the apartment door as a knock was heard “mike, look, i’ll call you back. i think i’ve found ash.”

the door knocked again, slightly more aggressively this time. she frowned, dragging herself up. “one second!” she yelled out, brushing her hair out with her fingers, makeup still lingering on her face from that morning.

the girl shakily moved over toward the door, opening it only to confirm her fears, yet also the sight was comforting.

three days after their breakup, ashton irwin stood at her door, clad in clothes that made him far too appealing to her, a single white rose gripped in his hand.

his expression was enough to kill her ten times over, the first time they’d seen eachother in six weeks and three days, and this is how it had to be. “i don’t want us to be over.” he spoke shakily, scanning her face for a reaction.

“don’t do this, ashton. we won’t work.” y/n teared, going to close the door, only for ash’s foot to stop her from doing so.

he shook his head “i don’t believe that.” he stated firmly. “i don’t believe that we won’t work, for four fucking years we’ve worked, i’m not going to throw all of that away because you think i care about my job more than you. nothing is more important than you, ever.”

she remained quiet, knowing ashton’s words were honest, though she believed he deserved more than what she could offer.

“i would give it all up for you in a heartbeat, baby. everything. never in my life has anything made more sense to me than this. than us. than you.” he took a deep breath, sinking down to his knee. “you’ve been the best part of me for forever, you make me who i am, for that i am so grateful. i don’t want to lose you over your own overthinking, n/n - marry me? let me never let you doubt my love again.”

she pouted, tears pouring as she slapped ashton around the back of his head. “you could’ve done it when i didn’t look a mess.” she choked out.

“you still haven’t answered.” ashton’s nervous look was enough to make anyone let out a giggle, the boy looked as if he was about to pass away on the spot.

“yes, dummy. of course i’ll marry you.”

[kindahoping4forever]

I Want Your Midnights // Ashton Irwin

Happy 2021 everyone! Thank you to everyone who feverishly (yet politely) requested a follow-up to Under The Christmas Lights; those holiday fics were really fun but kind of a lark and I didn’t expect that any of them would get that kind of reaction! I hope this continuation lives up to your expectations. 

Big, big thanks to @cal-puddies​​ for setting me back on the right path more than once while I was writing this - I honestly gave up about halfway through and she (lovingly) refused to let me give up so if you enjoy reading this, it’s because of her tbh.  

Warnings: Equal parts fluff, banter and smut, mentions of quarantine, frantic resolution of sexual tension, protected sex within a new relationship, references to consensual voyeurism, masturbation and oral sex on a male, oral sex performed on a female, discussion of and use of sex toys, single joking use of the word “Daddy”

Word Count: 5675

Hoe For The Hoe-lidays Masterlist

Masterlist // Taglist and Ko-Fi linked above

Let  me  know  what  you  think!

11:29pm, December 30

“So we really overestimated our self-control skills tonight, didn’t we?”

Ashton laughs raspily at your comment, the sound travelling from your phone speaker straight down your spine, giving you chills. You prop your head up on your pillow, gazing towards the direction of your window, towards his bedroom window, a sight you’d become quite accustomed to these past few nights.

You’ve talked to Ash everyday since your feelings for each other became obvious and ever since your Christmas encounter when your intentions for those feelings became explicit, you’ve spent your nights engaging in some sort of mutual self-pleasure either via text, phone call or window watching.

Tomorrow the quarantine you both agreed to will be over and you'll safely celebrate New Year's Eve together; earlier, the two of you decided you should forgo your nightly socially distanced rendezvous in the interest of building anticipation for your imminent in-person one. But you were already in bed when Ashton called to ask if there was anything he should bring tomorrow and one suggestive comment led to another and before you knew it, your hand was between your legs yet again.

“It’s my fault, I asked what kind of chips you wanted me to bring, I should’ve known that would get you hot and bothered,” he jokes, the sound of him pulling tissues from the box on his nightstand now a familiar tune to your ears.

“Pretty goddamn slutty of you, honestly,” you laugh giddily.

“Can’t imagine what you would’ve done had I asked if I could bring soda as well,” he cracks himself up.

You giggle, “Ohhh, listen, if you talk Dr. Pepper to me, I’ll have no choice but to break quarantine and have my way with you right now.”

“Explain how that’s supposed to deter me from the subject,” he teases. You hear his sheets rustling and know he’s settling back into bed. He exhales loudly before admitting, “I’m nervous for tomorrow.”

"Aww, why? It’s just me… just us.”

Ashton is quiet for a beat before answering. “I think part of it is it’s been a long time since I’ve had something to look forward to,” he ponders. “But also… I can’t remember the last time I wanted something… someone… this badly.”

Your heart feels like it skips a beat, like it always seems to around him, since the day you moved in over a year ago. “It’s gonna be good, Ash,” you quietly reassure him, reassure yourself. “We’re gonna be so good.”

10:45am, December 31

You wash your breakfast dishes in record time, focused on all you need to do to finish your work day and get ready for tonight; it’s only when you’re drying your hands that you mindlessly glance up and notice the sight before you.

You look up just as Ashton, midway through his daily workout, is reaching to peel off his white tee that’s mostly soaked through; you find yourself staring as his muscles flex, tighten and relax again as he pulls the material off his body and then uses the discarded shirt to wipe the sweat running down his chest and neck.

He takes a swig from his water bottle before he starts up again and you hear yourself audibly gulp as he bends and stretches, giving you the opportunity to admire his ass and thick thighs in his athletic leggings. You watch his body and lose yourself in thoughts of him hovering above you, moving over you the way he's moving over his mat on the deck.

The alarm on your phone set to remind you to clock back into work snaps you out of your lusty daze. You silence the noise and then quietly cackle to yourself as you type out a text to Ash: “Watching you stretch is really making me look forward to the stretch I’ll be feeling tonight.”

You hang by the window, waiting to see his reaction. He reads your message and a self-satisfied smirk spreads across his face; he looks towards your kitchen, hoping to catch a glimpse of you in all your surely flushed glory, but you’re already gone.  

4:07pm, December 31

Despite your mind's best efforts to distract you with wild thoughts about tonight, your work day finally ends and you head upstairs to get dressed. You stand in front of your closet, weighing your wardrobe options when your phone's text chime sounds out.

You scoop it off the bed, clicking on a message from Ashton reading, "If you need suggestions, you could wear your green dress… I’ve been thinking about taking that off of you for a while now.”

You shake your head at how instantly your heart speeds up once that image is in your mind. You bound over to the window to find him standing in front of his, waving with a cheeky grin on his face. You greet him by holding up the dress he mentioned in one hand and your middle finger in the other. “No spoilers” is your texted reply as you pull your curtains closed for the first time in weeks.

5:10pm, December 31

The doorbell rings and you’re shocked you can hear it over the sound of your heart pounding in your ears; you make yourself count to ten before you answer it. You take a deep breath and turn the knob, opening the door to reveal Ash beaming at you excitedly; one look at him and you feel any nerves that were nagging at you dissipate.

“Hey neighbor,” he greets you with a chuckle.

It takes you a beat before you realize you can reply with more than the shy wave you’re used to and you step forward to wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him into a tight hug. You breathe him in, grateful to finally decipher the scent you’ve caught occasional wafts of over the fence and have spent so long trying to pin down. It’s sweet, spicy, woodsy and fruity all at once; you can’t wait to have it all over you by the end of the night.

You pull back to study him, it’s the first time you’ve really gotten to look at him up close and he’s stunning. You never noticed his dark hair was dyed but now you see the light roots at his hairline, softening his face; some stray curls have fallen out of place and you sweep them aside, revealing the laugh lines crinkling around his eyes as he smiles at you. His eyes are deep pools of hazel you already feel yourself drowning in and his cheeks are much rounder than you realized, growing bigger the more he grins at you. His lips… well… his lips look soft and shapely and suddenly you feel like you might die if you don’t taste them this instant.

You place your hands on either side of his face, running your thumbs over his beard before closing the gap and pressing your mouth to his. It’s everything and nothing like you’d imagined your first kiss would be: soft, slow, cautious yet undeniably heated. You feel his tongue slide over your bottom lip and you allow him to deepen the kiss; he murmurs as your tongue connects with his for the first time and he pulls away to check in with you.

You offer him a sweet smile that quickly turns into something more frisky. “I think we can do better than that, we’ve spent the past week listening to each other cum,” you tease.

Ashton smirks at you, stepping inside; in one swift motion, he kicks the door shut behind him and scoops you in his arms, backing you up against it, lips crashing into yours. Suddenly it’s like your mouths can’t move fast enough, feverishly trying to make up for lost time. You kiss him like you’re trying to commit his taste to memory and maybe you are.

He breaks away to mouth over your neck, immediately licking and kissing over the parts of your skin his beard scratched moments before; you run your hands through his curls, marveling at the fact that’s something you’re allowed to do now. His mouth ends up sucking over a spot behind your ear that’s such a specific turn on for you, your mind races to remember if you told him that during one of your phone sessions or if he just knew. He bites down a little and you cry out, pushing him back, ready for more.

You slot your lips with his again, already missing his taste on your tongue. You walk him backwards as you kiss, trying desperately to lead him to the nearest surface, any surface where you can get him between your legs.

You make it to your desk at the other end of the living room and you thank your past self for taking the time to put away your work from earlier, although it would’ve been fun to see Ash do the cliché “impassioned arm sweep” to clear it. You hop up on the edge and spread your legs, pulling him close, needing as much of him on you as possible.

Ash groans when your hips move against his and you grin at the feeling of his cock straining against his pants, brushing over your clothed heat. “Hard for me already, eh?” You tease, biting at his lower lip.

He gives a lighthearted scoff. “Please, I’ve been hard for you since I saw you in this dress through the window before I walked over here,” he rasps, gliding his hands up and down your body in the form-fitting outfit to illustrate his point. “You look incredible, by the way.”

You rut against him again and you both moan. “God, I can’t wait any longer, Ash, I need you,” you rush out, breathless.

“Yeah?” He checks, looking over your face, noting the desperation in your eyes. “I have a - ”

“Yeah, please, Ash, fuck,” you pant, out of your mind with desire.

He kisses you hurriedly as his hands skillfully slide under your dress and tug your panties down your legs, setting them aside; he reaches to retrieve a condom out of his coat pocket. It briefly crosses your mind how absurd it is that he’s still wearing his coat and you’re about to move to help him out of it but then he’s pulling his cock out and you can’t focus on anything other than getting your hands on him.

You give him a feather light squeeze before starting an agonizingly slow rhythm on his shaft and reaching down to cup his balls like you’ve seen him do; he’s as thick and heavy in your hand as you imagined and you feel yourself becoming wetter with every stroke. He brushes your hands aside so he can roll the condom on and you capture his lips in a lusty kiss because you’re not sure what else to do.

One of Ashton’s hands cradles your head as you kiss him, the other trails between your thighs and starts teasing your clit; he murmurs into your mouth when he feels how wet you are, how after just a few touches, you’re already rocking into his hand. He breaks the kiss to push your skirt up over your waist so you can both watch as he lines himself up at your entrance. He glances at you and with your eager nod of approval, he starts pushing in.

You inhale sharply at the sensation and he pauses, eyes darting up to yours. “No, it’s good, more,” you insist, hooking your legs around his waist. He continues to slide in and you feel your eyes roll back, your teeth sinking into your bottom lip. It's obviously been a while since you've had anyone inside you but the fact that it's Ash and the size of him… what a way to get back in the game.

He groans as he starts moving in you, slowly at first, eyes trained on your face to make sure you’re comfortable. You pull him into a kiss that’s all tongue, tangling your hands in his hair, needing to feel as much of him as you can in this moment. You've started moving along with him, your body asking for more, so he carefully lays you back on the desk, gripping onto your thighs so he can ramp up his pace.

The sound of his hips hitting yours, your clothes rustling together and your intertwined grunts and moans of encouragement for each other fill the living room. He lets go of one of your legs so he can move his hand back down to your clit and as he rubs circles on it, you curse under your breath, stunned you already feel as undone as you do.

"I'm already close," you whisper, gripping his arm as he leans in, bracing himself on his hands on either side of you.

"First of many tonight," he smirks, trying to maintain his sexy cool demeanor but failing as you both burst into giggles at his remark. He lightly encourages you, "Tell me what you need."

You squeeze your clothed breasts and use your legs to bring him even closer to you. "Hard. Just. Hard," you pant.

Ash growls, grabbing your legs again, pushing them up towards your chest, fingers digging into your skin as he thrusts with force. You cry out at his renewed vigor, at the change in angle making him somehow feel even thicker and longer inside you. You bring your hand to your clit and it only takes a few seconds of pressure for your breath to catch and your body to start shaking.

"Ash… fuckfuckfuckfuck oh my god," you breathe, pawing at the collar of his coat, your back arching up off the desk as your orgasm crests.

You're not sure if he was holding off waiting for you to finish or if the intensity of your body climaxing around him does him in but Ashton follows you over the edge less than a minute later. He gasps your name as he cums like you've heard him do many times over the phone but hearing him say it as he hovers above you, knowing your pussy is the reason for his pleasure is a different experience entirely.

He collapses on you briefly and you revel in the tactile experience: his lips pressing gently against your neck as he comes down, the texture of his wool coat under your fingertips as you rub his back, the unexpectedly satisfying scratch of his beard on your skin.

Ashton's lips travel back up to yours in an unhurried, relaxed kiss before he pushes himself back over you, joking, "We've really got to work on that impulse control thing, don't we?"

7:52pm, December 31

The two of you enjoyed a nice dinner comprised of delicious food and compatible conversation; you’ve talked a lot over the past few weeks but being able to finally be so close, being able to touch his arm when he says something sweet, feel his laughter vibrate the wood of your table - there’s an air of normalcy and domesticity that wasn’t there before. It’s nice, almost like there aren’t strange global circumstances that led to this evening, like you haven’t been basically dating from a distance.

You stand up to clear the table and when you reach for his plate, he grabs your hand and pulls you into his lap, hugging you tight and thanking you for inviting him over. He helps you carry the dishes to the kitchen because of course he does and when he stands at the sink to rinse them, you wrap your arms around his waist and press your face into his back, because that’s something you've always wanted to do.

You move to the living room, coffee mugs in hand but they’re soon forgotten with the return of Ash’s lips to your neck and your hands in his hair. You’re not in the hurry that you were earlier so everything feels much more relaxed; you’re able to appreciate the little things more, like the way he hums into your kiss when you brush his hair behind his ears, the quick pecks he sneaks in as he’s pulling out of a long liplock with you.

He finally undresses you, laying you gently on the couch in your underwear. “For someone who said they’d been waiting to get me out of that dress, sure took you a while,” you tease, gasping as his hands massage your breasts through the lace you’re wearing and his mouth peppers kisses over your stomach.

“Looked too good, wanted to enjoy it a little longer,” he smoothly replies, hooking his thumbs in your panties, glancing up at you to make sure it’s okay for him to continue. You nod, lifting your hips to aid the process. He kisses his way back up your legs, beard dragging across your skin, murmuring, “Something else I’ve waited too long to do…” before pressing a series of wet kisses directly over your clit.

You squirm against his face, eager for him to get into it but Ashton seems determined to take his time, slowly teasing up and down your lips, moving over to nip at your thighs and then returning to your pussy, tongue lavishing attention everywhere except where you want him most.

You’re just about to speak up when his fingers spread your lips apart and his tongue starts fluttering at your clit, causing you to suck in a breath instead. “God, Ash, yes, like that,” you encourage, fighting to keep your eyes open so you can watch him work. It feels so much better, looks so much more erotic than you ever could’ve imagined.

His mouth remains attached as he slips a finger inside you; the way your hips start grinding against him tells him when you’re ready for another and you moan as his tongue and fingers find an alternating rhythm to please you.

You paw at your tits, pinching your nipples through your bra as he works you. He pulls off to catch his breath, pushing himself up near your face to check in. “This working for you?” He asks, panting.

You affectionately swipe over what you thought was sweat on his beard, groaning at the realization it’s actually moisture courtesy of you. “Are you fucking kidding me, dude?” You laugh. “The other night I came thinking about you doing this and it’s already better than both the fantasy and the toy I used.”

He grins with pride. “Good,” he winks at you before diving back in.

Ashton eats your pussy with confidence, attentively listening to your sounds to determine what you like best. It’s when he sets one of your legs over his shoulder, angling your hips up slightly, that you start sounding really desperate and he smirks to himself. “Aww, ready to cum already? I was just getting started,” he taunts playfully.

You let out a guttural moan at his remark, gripping his hair a little bit rougher, holding him to your body a little bit tighter. He grabs on to your hips as they try to speed up and you murmur incoherent praise as you cum on his tongue.

He continues to lick at you, cleaning you until you push him away, clamping your legs shut. He massages over your thighs tenderly before moving up to kiss you. With a twinkle in his eye, he asks, “So what other fantasies of yours can we best while I'm here?”

9:24pm, December 31

After an enthusiastic but quicker than either of you would’ve preferred blowjob on the couch, you and Ash end up back in the kitchen, ready for a snack. You giggle to yourself as you stand in just his shirt, digging through your kitchen junk drawer, searching for a rubber band to help grip the jar of nacho sauce neither of you seem to be able to open.

“It’s not funny, how humiliating that I’m showing such weakness on our first date,” he jokes through gritted teeth, trying his hardest to turn the lid.

You grin, enjoying the show of Ashton clad only in his boxers, pouting as he loses the battle against a jar of cheese sauce. “Yes, you’ve fed me, done my dishes and made me cum twice since you’ve been here but I clearly still need you to prove your worth as a mate to me,” you smirk, passing him the rubber band you discovered. “Although I have to say, if you want to keep trying to open that yourself, I don’t hate watching those tattoos dance while you struggle.”

He laughs sarcastically as he fits the band over the lid and effortlessly pops it open seconds later. “Easy, I don’t know why you were so worried,” he giggles loudly before he even finishes his sentence.

He begins pouring the cheese over the chips you set out and you slide yourself under his free arm, fitting easily into his side. “New Year’s resolution, you clearly need to work on your upper body strength,” you tease, playfully biting at his shapely bicep.

He snorts, smiling as he passes you the plate of food to put in the microwave. He leans against the counter, observing you fondly while he wonders out loud, “Are you a New Year’s resolutions person?”

You move to get the other toppings out of the fridge; you stop and think before passing him the goods. “I mean, I’ll make them but I never really follow through. It’s like after the first week or so it just kind of slips my mind... maybe I’m making the wrong resolutions, I guess.” You shrug, setting the heated plate on the counter. “You?”

Ash shakes his head, hopping up on the counter so he can easily look at you and dress the nachos at the same time. “I never really understood why the calendar resetting is supposed to be this all-powerful impetus for change. If you want to do something, you should just do it no matter what the date is,” he says passionately, with furrowed brow.

You nod, pouring two glasses of soda. “It’s important to make goals but the rigidity of a resolution kind of just chains you to one thing when the whole point of a new year is that you don’t know what it will bring," you point out. "I think that's what's slipped me up before. Instead of saying 'I'll work out five days a week' I should be saying 'I want to live healthier.' It shouldn't be about the thing, it should be about the change you want to see."

You notice he's gone quiet and you look up at him inquisitively. You find him gazing at you, enchanted. "I agree," he reassures you. "I was just enjoying hearing you talk about it."

You feel your cheeks get warm and you pause to take a sip to collect yourself. "What I do like about New Year’s is the opportunity to reflect on the year you’ve had and let that inform what your next year will be like," you share. "So. What's one thing you didn't do this year that you wish you had? And not something because of quarantine, that's a copout."

Ashton doesn't hesitate to say, "I wish I had gotten to know you sooner."

10:53pm, December 31

You chuckle at Ash's wide-eyed interest, “No, I haven’t used that one to get off with you yet.” You take the thick blue dildo from his hands and smack it on the headboard of your bed, yanking on it to demonstrate the suction cup. “It’s more of a shower toy… or sometimes I’ll stick it to one of my chairs and ride it.”

His cock twitches with interest and he absentmindedly gives it a subtle squeeze. “Well we’re gonna put a pin in that, I guess,” he mutters, peering back into the drawer. “Also I like that you said ‘yet.’”

You smile widely at him, enjoying his enthusiasm. You’d finally made it to bed and were getting ready to ride him but when you opened your bedside table to grab a condom, your toy collection caught his attention and curiosity took over; you’ve spent the last five minutes watching him eye your toys, eagerly asking which ones you’ve used during your phone conversations with him.

He jumps as a pink contraption he doesn’t recognize starts to rumble out of his grasp with the push of a button. You giggle and reach over, unfolding it, placing the top portion of it over the back of his hand. “I used this one last night,” you admit, clicking the second button, watching his jaw drop as he feels the toy start lightly sucking at his skin.

“You’ve definitely had a much more fun quarantine than me,” he laughs, shaking his head in disbelief as he turns up the settings of the vibe. “What do you even need me here for?”

“You’re a lot nicer to talk to,” you say sweetly, leaning in to give him a playful kiss.

“I also would’ve accepted ‘your cock is much bigger, Daddy,’” Ash deadpans. He waits a beat before bursting into loud laughter, clarifying, “I’m totally kidding.”

“Well we’re gonna put a pin in that, I guess,” you tease, reaching down to lightly give him a few strokes. “Although I don’t know if I can say that first part, you haven’t seen my other drawer… I’m totally kidding.”

He scoffs, kissing you hard, placing his hands on either side of your ass and moving you closer to him. ”What’d you do with that condom?”

You pat around the bed for a few seconds, triumphantly holding up the stray package you found lost in the sheets. You roll the condom on him while he continues rifling through your belongings. “This is cute,” he declares, rolling a purple bullet vibe across his fingers. “And tiny. We could probably use this right now, huh?”

You raise your eyebrows, surprised but impressed at his openness. “Yeah, if you want, that’d actually be great,” you agree.

He beams at you, tossing you the vibrator while he settles back against the pillows; you set it aside and sling your leg over him, leaning in to kiss him thoroughly. You lean your forehead against his as you line yourself up over his cock and start rolling your hips back and forth, teasing the both of you by running your pussy over him; you watch him bite his lip, not sure whether to cry out from pleasure or object in frustration. Finally, you reach to guide him inside you. You take him a little easier than last time but the stretch is still deliciously intense and Ash can see it on your face. He plays with your tits while you adjust, watching you closely to see what you like.

You eventually start moving, lightly bracing yourself on his chest as you get going; you set a moderate speed, eager to let him fill you but cautious of trying to pace yourself, trying to pay attention to what he seems to respond to. You switch from rocking to a bouncing motion after a couple minutes and his hands move to squeeze your hips, helping you along; you notice his eyes haven’t left your breasts since you started moving like this and you whimper, running your hands down your front, stopping to pinch and play as needed.

Ashton's hands soon replace yours again and you arch your back, allowing him easier access. He gives a low groan, you’re giving him such a show, he’s not sure where to look. You’re leaned back and bracing yourself on his thighs, hard nipples jutting out, begging for attention; you expertly work your bodies together and he finds himself hypnotized watching his cock disappear inside you over and over again.

You love how he’s staring at you; it’s making you feel wanted and bold and you decide to tease him a little. “Working so hard to take all this cock, does it look as good as it feels?” You murmur, lifting yourself off almost entirely and then sliding back down on him with ease. “You like watching me fuck you?”

A growl escapes his lips and his hands roam your body wildly. “Doing so good… look so fucking good riding me,” he says, voice rasping with desire. “Better than I ever imagined.”

He feels the overwhelming need to make you moan for him and he sneaks his hand between your folds; you jolt at the contact, letting out a yelp and he smiles at his victory. He reaches over and grabs the vibe, tapping your leg to ask if you’re ready. You answer with a breathy “uh-huh” as you continue riding him.

He clicks the button, setting it to the lowest speed and presses it to your clit to gauge your reaction; you shift your rhythm, slowing to allow yourself to feel the new stimulation. You lick your lips, mumbling, “Oh, that’s nice,” as you grasp his hand to move the toy over just a bit until you’re moaning outright.

Ash holds the vibe on you for a bit longer until you sit up to change position. After a short spell of trial and error, he slips the bullet between your bodies and you help him once again fit it against you until it’s giving you the kind of stimulation you need. You roll your hips a few times, testing the setup and within seconds you’re whining, his cock hitting inside you in just the right place and the vibrations making you squirm above him.

He runs his hands up and down your thighs, watching you work yourself on him, using his body and your vibrator to build your climax; he gently rocks up into you, not wanting to disrupt you but between your movements and the stray buzzing of your bullet, he’s starting to become overwhelmed himself.

“Ash! Fuck… good… fuck,” you mutter, falling forward, place your arms on either side of his head to prop yourself up as you keep fucking him. “Close. God, I’m so close. Please.”

He recognizes that tone of desperation in your voice and knows just what to say to help you over the edge. “Fuckin’ me so good… ‘bout to make me cum for you… need to feel you cum around me first,” he wraps his arms around your back, panting in your ear. “Come on, baby, you deserve it.”

Your breathing speeds up and you whine his name as you start to pulse around him, losing your rhythm, clawing at his shoulders. He holds you as you cum, riding it out until you can’t take it anymore and you reach between you, throwing the vibrator across the bed, not even bothering to shut it off.

Ashton chuckles softly at your frenzied action and notices what looks like a wince as you rock yourself lightly on him. “Hey, I can finish another way if this is too much for you,” he offers.

You shake your head vigorously. “No, it still feels good,” you tell him insistently. “I’m just tired. Maybe you could…”

He gathers your meaning and pulls you down into a sloppy kiss before you move your mouth to his neck, slowly sucking to leave a mark, humming as his beard scrapes your skin; he grips your ass tightly with both hands and starts fucking up into you. He begins cautiously, wanting to make sure you’re still feeling good and as the noises pouring from your lips reassure him that you are, he increases his speed, thrusting up with force.

Your moans blend together in perfect harmony until yours trail off as you lose your breath; before you know what’s happening, you feel yourself cumming again and hard. You bury your face in Ash’s neck, hands tugging roughly at his hair. Feeling you squeeze around him again and with such intensity is enough to set him off and with a few loud grunts, he’s filling the condom.

He sighs deeply, rubbing your back as the two of you come down; your breathing falls into a synchronized rhythm and you bask in how nice it feels just to lay with him for a minute.

"Well that was something," he comments, pecking the top of your head as he helps you off of him, laying you on your pillow.

You quickly pull him back in, planting a quick kiss on his lips before he gets out of bed. "No, you are," you coo.

12:39am, January 1

"Ash… Ash… we missed it," you laugh softly, pressing kissing along his collarbones until his eyes flutter open.

"Huh?"

"We fell asleep and missed midnight," you explain with an amused smile. "Happy New Year."

He lifts his head up, looking around the room in confusion. After you’d both cleaned up, you climbed back in bed, intending to relax and chat until it was time to watch the midnight countdown on TV. Evidently, once the cuddles started, exhaustion from the night's activities overtook you both and you awoke to the sound of fireworks going off in the neighborhood.

"Oh," he frowns, rolling on his side to face you. "Well. Happy New Year." He leans in and gives you a soft kiss that easily could turn into more but you pull back, wanting to say something.

You run your hand up and down his side and say, "I'm glad we did this." He raises an eyebrow, smirking at you and you playfully pinch his arm. "You know what I mean. I'm glad you came over. I'm glad you're here."

Ashton's face softens and he scoots closer to you, placing his head next to you on your pillow. "Me too," he responds sincerely. "Sorry we missed midnight though, wanted to kiss you."

“Well lucky for us, we’ll get another midnight in about 23 hours,” you grin, reaching over to scratch his beard.

He slips his hand around your waist, pulling you to his lips. He murmurs against your mouth, “Do over at my place? It’s a date.”

————-

Taglist issues again so my apologies if you get notif’d more than once (or not at all)

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[morningfears]

Linger

Rating: M | This is smut! No one under 18!

Summary: Calum gets a little handsy while you’re out at a bar with friends. (Fingering in public, basically.)

Word Count: 2.1k

The bar was crowded, typical for the late summer evening, and the sounds of revelry could be heard from the parking lot as you stepped out of Calum’s car. It was the one bar that everyone in your friend group loved - it was also the bar where you and Calum had met - so it was no surprise that you ended up there, ready to spend the night catching up on things you’d missed throughout the week. 

It wasn’t often that you all went out drinking, not anymore, but tour was fast approaching and you were all eager to take advantage of your time together as a group while you still could. There was no telling when you’d be able to do this again, without the added pressure of work, so you and Calum abandoned your plans to spend the night alone together at home.

As you weaved through the rows of parked cars, Calum’s hand found the small of your back. His skin was warm against yours and you breathed a quiet sigh as you climbed the steps to the patio where the rest of your friends were already waiting. He was always glad to spend time with the boys, however, he’d made it clear that he’d had other plans for the night.

Right before he left for tour, Calum got into a mood. He was a little clingier, a little more hands on, and today had been no different. He’d taken every opportunity to wrap his arms around you, to touch you, to kiss you, and you weren’t complaining. The touches were light, loving, and the kinds of touches that you most associated with Calum. However, that changed after you’d gotten dressed for the night out.

The outfit was nothing special, nothing Calum hadn’t seen you in a million times, but the way he’d reacted to seeing you dressed in the black mini skirt you knew he loved never failed to bring heat to your cheeks. He’d - only half seriously - propositioned you to stay home and let him remind you of just how much he loved seeing you in that skirt but the girls were blowing up your group chat. Though it pained you to turn him down, you reminded him - and yourself - that you could always enjoy yourselves when you returned home.

He’d agreed, he knew that you were right, but there was a glint of mischief in his eyes that told you he wasn’t going to relent entirely. Not without a little fun, anyway.

“There you guys are. Thought you’d gotten lost on your way.” Ashton is grinning, happy to see the two of you, and you return his smile in kind as you take the seat in the corner.

“L.A. traffic is a literal nightmare. ‘Sides, we both had to actually put on clothes suitable for leaving the house. We’ve been living in sweats,” you retorted with a laugh as you watched Calum settle into the seat beside you.

“We’re not even late. You guys were just uncharacteristically early,” Calum pointed out as one hand found your thigh while the other reached for the drink menu in the center of the table as if he didn’t already know what he wanted.

The conversation quickly shifted to plans for the future as Michael, the person who’d drawn the short straw and was tasked with grabbing the first round, headed to the bar with Crystal. Sierra, grinning and bright, gestured to Luke’s recently bleached hair before she pointed at Calum’s nearly completely faded pink curls. “How do we convince them to keep these for longer than a few more weeks?”

They’d both dyed their hair for the Wildflower video and you’d fallen head over heels for the pretty pink that Calum had donned. You knew that he was planning on either buzzing it again or bleaching it but you enjoyed the pink tint that remained. Without thinking, you lifted your hand to run your fingers through his curls and Calum leaned into your touch with a glance in your direction and a slight tilt to his lips that hinted at his amusement. He returned your touch with one of his own, a squeeze to your thigh, and that was that.

“I’ve tried everything,” you assured her as you gently tugged at the curls and bit back a grin at the groan Calum released. “But even the puppy dog eyes aren’t working. He’s not budging on the pink. I think I talked him out of the buzzcut for the time being, though.”

“Why do you hate the buzzcut so much? I like it.” He knew why, you’d explained yourself time and time again when his head was between your thighs and you were incapable of doing anything but whine his name and grip his shoulders instead of the curls you wanted to tug, and his grin told you that he just wanted to hear you explain yourself.

You rolled your eyes and tugged at his curls once more, relishing in the increase in volume of his groan. “You’re really annoying. You know that, right?” You weren’t serious, he knew that. It was exactly the answer he was expecting, accompanied by heat rushing to your cheeks when Ashton howled in laughter, and his grin grew as he shot you a wink.

That was one of his favorite things to do - making you flush and either lose your words entirely or retort with a roll of your eyes -  and though you’d whined at first, you loved it more than you’d ever tell him. It was never explicit, usually just him asking you to explain something that sent your mind straight to the gutter instead of letting it remain unspoken, but it was a game that he liked playing and one you had yet to grow tired of.

As always when you were with the group, the conversation never lingered on one subject for too long. It was always chaos, sometimes controlled but usually a complete clusterfuck of tangential comments masquerading as a coherent conversation, but there was no shortage of laughter. As the night wore on, as the patio grew darker and the conversation grew stranger, your sides hurt from laughing and your cheeks hurt from smiling. Your group was in the corner, away from prying eyes and listening ears, and Calum’s hand never left your thigh as you both enjoyed your night out with friends.

As Michael and Luke found themselves in the midst of a playful argument, both men pointing fingers and giggling uncontrollably as the alcohol tinted their cheeks pink and emboldened them, Calum’s hand drifted a little higher up your thigh. You wrote it off as nothing, used to his touch and even leaning into it, however, you were quickly proven wrong as his fingers dipped beneath the hem of your skirt.

When you turned your head, glancing at him questioningly, Calum kept his eyes on Michael and Luke but squeezed your thigh as a warning not to let on that anything was happening. It had been a while since he’d tried anything in public - the last time ended with the pair of you locked in a bar bathroom for a little too long before Ashton, the only sober one in the group, had to drag you out and take you home - and you found yourself a little too excited by the prospect as you shifted a little closer to him.

Calum was always better at feigning nonchalance than you. He was good at keeping the easy grin on his lips and laughing in the right places in the conversation. You, on the other hand, had a hard time concentrating on anything but Calum as his hand drifted higher up your thigh and his fingers brushed the lace of your panties.

You kept your drink in your hand, teeth nipping at your straw, to keep yourself from sighing as he teased you. He knew that he had time, Ashton had just started telling a story that he’d heard a million times but knew the others were pleasantly tipsy enough to want to hear again, so he took his time just brushing his fingers over your heat. He wanted to see you squirm, to watch you struggle to keep quiet, and with the combination of alcohol and the setting, he knew that he would get exactly that.

Every time Calum touched you in public, he had a sort of routine. He would surprise you, slip his hand between your thighs when you least expected it, and then lull you back into a sense of complacency as he took his time working you up. He alternated between brushing your thighs, his fingers warm against your already heading skin, and brushing his fingers over your clothed heat as he felt the material begin to dampen. He waited for your shoulders to relax, for you to return to the conversation and offer a comment or two on the topic at hand - whether you believed Ashton should bleach his hair, too, or leave it dark -, before he brushed the lace aside and let his fingers brush through your wetness.

You gripped your glass a little too hard and thanked your lucky stars that the conversation surrounding you was loud enough to cover the gasp you released as his fingers found your clit. You tried your hardest to keep your face neutral and when that failed, you returned your straw to your mouth and pretended to focus on the drink in your hand. Beside you, Calum hid his grin behind his beer and shifted to get a little closer as your thighs threatened to close around his hand.

You swallowed your desire to close your legs as Calum’s fingers rubbed lazy circles over your clit. He said something, responded to something Ashton said, but it all sounded like white noise as you shifted enough for him to finally slip a finger into your heat. You couldn’t focus on anything but him as he finally gave you what he’d been building up to for far too long.

It was never frantic in situations like this, though you imagined it would be, and you were almost in awe of how slow he seemed to be moving as he took his time with you. Every drag of his fingers, every time the hell of his hand bumped your clit, you wanted to whine at him to hurry but you knew that you couldn’t. You had to sit back, content with what he was giving, and stew in silence lest your friends catch on and tease you about it for the foreseeable future. And that was one of the things he loved. He loved hearing you whine and beg, your lust clouding your patience, but moments like these were his favorite as he was in control of the pace.

When your free hand moved to his knee, your nails digging into his leg through the material of his jeans, he decided to take pity on you. He’d teased you enough, had taken his time, and you’d been patient enough to keep the attention away from what was happening beneath the table. So, when Luke stood to grab the drinks and pouted at Sierra for her to join him, causing everyone to devolve into giggles at his clearly lovesick attitude, Calum took the opportunity to give you what you’d been waiting for.

He moved his fingers as quickly as he could to avoid drawing attention. It was an awkward angle, one that made touching you the way he really wanted to a little difficult, but he did the best he could with the space he had. It was enough to draw soft sighs of pleasure and to have you struggling to keep your eyes open as you barreled toward your end.

He was grateful, just as you were, that it was dark out. Even under the lamps littering the patio, your face was hidden in shadows and only he could see the way your eyes fluttered shut and your mouth opened slightly when you finally fell over the edge. It was a sight reserved for him and him alone, something he would never tire of seeing, and he let his hands linger between your thighs as he drew out your high as long as he could get away with.

When it finally became too much for you, when you nudged at his hand and shifted uncomfortably at the overstimulation, he removed his hand and wiped his fingers on a napkin. Though he wasn’t normally one for public kisses, he couldn’t help himself as he leaned over and pressed a soft kiss to your lips. He heard coos from the others and lifted his hand to show them all the finger as you buried your face in the crook of his neck.

The haze of your orgasm lingered over you as a summer breeze blew. The night wasn’t exactly what you’d expected but any night with Calum was more than perfect. And you couldn’t wait to return the favor once you made it home.

________________________________________

Author’s Note: Is this good? Not really. But it was fun. And it was inspired by a fantasy I had for this person (and if that person, by some miracle, happens to read this.... sorry). I was reminded of it when I read this fic for Spencer Reid (I know. I’ve been watching CM) and needed to write. The fantasy was..... Different. A little rougher, a little more ending in a broom closet or something but this felt more Cal. I dunno. Anyway. Yes. This was a struggle to write but I desperately needed to write something. I feel so useless being so unproductive when I literally have all the time in the world. Ugh. Okay. Anyway.

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[cal-puddies]

is it warm enough for you inside me? || calum hood

this is 100% a joint effort with @kindahoping4forever​. So if you are lucky enough to live in the midwest of the US, then you know we had a random one day snow storm the other and I was talking to crystal about it. mind you i was drinking so i launched into the tropiest idea i could and this is what came out. Make sure you give her extra love too because she doesn’t realize how fucking good she is at writing.

Cal had been your best friend for a while, you couldn’t exactly remember when you met, but you’d run into him and Ashton and he quite literally ran into you, knocking you on your ass and it’s all history from there. 

The two of you had decided a get away was in order, work stress for you and him being home from tour for too long, you both needed a break. 

And getting there was a disaster, Cal had mistaken AM flights for PM flights and booked because they were a good deal, and you didn’t actually see the tickets until last minute only to realize you needed to be up at 3 am and it had been midnight and you were tipsy and still not fully packed. 

Then the airline lost your bag. You had to wait in the airport for hours to get a rental because they were all out and you were 12 hours early.

To make matters worse, you still had to drive in a snowstorm over two hours to get to the cabin he’d rented. And you, of course, trip in the snow almost immediately. And it wasn’t light, fluffy snow, it was the super heavy, super wet stuff, and it of course soaked you through. 

So that brings you to now, tired and cold, with no extra clothes for the night except what Cal decides he can spare. It leaves you in his hoodie and your panties. The two of you sitting in front of the fire, making s’mores. 

He’s wearing the crotch hole jeans and telling  you about how he had to teach Luke about graham crackers. 

“You’re kind of being an asshole.” He mentions. 

“This isn’t exactly what I had in mind for a fun getaway. I haven’t slept in two days and I don’t know If I’m getting my bag back or I just have to wear the same clothes for the next four days.” You gripe. “And I’m fucking cold.” You groan. 

Cal nods in understanding. “I know I messed up the flights but you don’t have to take everything out on me.” He reminds you. 

You relax, because he’s right and you’d be equally as annoyed if he treated you like this. You head for the couch and throw a blanket over your lap. 

And not too long after that is when you propose the alcohol gets cracked open for the "scientific warmth", and when you cheers to your first drink, he calls a truce.

“Sorry for being a jerk, just everything that could, did go wrong” he murmurs, clinking glasses.

“Murphy’s law.” You mumble, agreeing. 

Downing your shot, you can't help but get one last jab in, "I can feel you getting likeable again already!" and then as it usually goes whenever one of you gets in a Mood, it's immediately as if nothing happened. 

You're laughing about the way you fell in the snow and doing impressions of the unhelpful airline employees who couldn't help with your bag situation.

And Cal notices you hogging the blanket on the couch, so he just climbs on next to you and helps himself, “you already got my hoodie so you gotta share.” 

“I’d share anything with you,” you mumble under your breath.

Which he doesn't hear because Cal is making a show of getting comfortable with you on the couch, “so cozy, so comfy,” and he pulls you against him for maximum comfort for you both.

And you lay there together for a while, talking about everything and nothing, his hands are slipping under the hoodie after the third drink because you are warm in his hoodie and his hands are cold.

You gasp at his touch but not entirely because of the temperature change. Calum hood could touch you 100000 times and you’d still never be ready for the full on butterfly feeling

He nonchalantly drums his fingers on your  bare skin because he's Cal and hasn't noticed how your breathing has changed, doesn’t notice you seem to hold your breath and you’re not laughing as much, because what if your stomach feels weird to him and he’s grossed out. 

You kind of panic and you know you need an out of this situation. So you end up exaggeratedly yawning, “think I’m gonna head to bed Cal, I’m exhausted.” You mumble. But you know you just need to put some space between you for even just a few minutes, you don't know how much longer you can pretend that your face is flushed from drinking. 

Cal agrees “yeah, we should get some rest so we can fight the airline for your fuckin bag,” so he’s behind you, rambling, and when you make it to the bedroom in your little cabin, you realize Calum must have booked one with only one bed. You stop short in the doorway.

He finally makes it to the door and bumps into you. He takes in the room and kind of laughs, “coulda sworn I asked for two.” He scratches the back of his neck. 

“It’s cool, I’ll sleep on the couch.” You shrug, turning to walk away, it’s too crowded in here now. 

“Don’t be ridiculous, you’ll freeze, we’ll share.” 

"Great" you sigh, and while he's gone back to the living room to make sure everything's locked up, you quickly rearrange the bedding to form a makeshift pillow wall down the middle of the bed,  so you have at least some hope of being able to rest. You rush to the bathroom to pull yourself together as you hear him coming back down the hall.

Cal thinks the pillow wall is ridiculous when and is rearranging the bed when you come back, he gives you this look like ‘what is wrong with you?’

“What?! My back hurts from tensing up and shivering; I just wanted some extra support.” 

“I can rub your back, and if you're still that cold, we should probably snuggle up skin to skin. You know, transfer body heat and all that.” He explains. 

You groan internally as he strips down, to his underwear and snuggles into the bed, “here I’ll get it warmed up for ya.” He smiles, and wow he’s looking so cute smiley and snugg in the bed, cheeks tinted pink from the alcohol. He makes a show of kicking his legs and rolling around to warm up the bed, and then looks at you, “c’mon! It’s warm, hoodie off.” 

“Calum.” You roll your eyes.

"Just tryna help, love," and next thing you know he's pouting with those plush lips and god, you really could not have made this a worse situation for yourself if you had tried. You fidget with the hem of the hoodie for a beat longer before you offer an exasperated "Fuck it" and tear it off and hurriedly slide under the covers.

“That’s my girl.” Calums grins, pulling you into him. He wraps his arm around you and starts absentmindedly rubbing your back, “isn’t this better? The bed is warm, we’re cuddled up together rather than having all those pillows to make sure we both stay cold?”

You roll your eyes to yourself at his ability to remain totally oblivious to the situation. It's so Calum. This isn't the first time your attraction to him has gotten the best of you but it's definitely the closest you've come to having to address it. Wrapped up in tattooed arms, bare chest pressed up against your back, this is the closest you've been to Calum, period. "You were right, 's great, Cal. Thanks" you say warmly but in a tone you hope makes it clear the conversation doesn't need to continue.

He stays quiet for a little bit, burying his face against the back of your neck. “Glad we decided to get away.” He murmurs, and you get goosebumps as his lips brush against the back of your neck. “Are you cold? Here, turn over, against me.” He says softly.

You can't think of a reason not to so you flip over as requested. He runs his hand vigorously up and down your arm, that he's decided entirely on his own needs warming. In a genuine but light tone, you ask, "How are you not tired? We got up so early and everything that went wrong... hell is literally freezing over right now. Why are you not sleeping?" 

Without even a beat of hesitation, he shrugs and answers simply, "Guess I'd rather talk to you."

You let out a little sigh. Cal was aloof. No idea what those words meant to you, no idea of the total effect he was having on you, and you’re not even sure he’d care if he did know and that was annoying enough.

You must still have a notable amount of liquid courage in you because you hear yourself press him, "Well. Let's talk then. Tell me something I don't know. And make it interesting, Hood."

And he decides to match your courage, “I think you’re pretty.” He murmurs, in case you don’t hear him and he can take it back.

You purse your lips in thought. Normally you're a big believer in the "go big or go home" mindset but the problem here is if this goes wrong, you can't go home because of the storm. His admission isn't much but coming from Cal, it's kind of a lot. Realizing you need to respond before either of you lose your nerve, you take a deep breath and move the slightest bit closer to him on the bed. "You got me drunk and naked during a blizzard just to tell me I'm pretty?"

Cal lets out a sigh of relief and grins at you, “best laid plans darlin... what did you wanna hear, about how I wanna kiss you, or suck your clit instead?” He decides to be brash right back.

You grin back at him while your mind is going a mile a minute. You search his eyes, trying to decide how much of this is him trying to get a reaction out of you, hoping this is for real and not just a game of chicken that flirty friends might play. You clear your throat and smirk, "Well. I guess I did say make it interesting, now didn't I?"

“Right, right.” He nods... “so you definitely wanted to hear about how I’d kiss down your body, paying attention to your neck and nipples because I know you like that. Maybe a couple hickies? Then your thighs would just be covered in marks...” he watches you shift, “should I go on?” He smirks

You love that smirk and you hate that smirk. That smirk that lets him get away with anything but also let's on that he knows he can get away with anything. You wish your breathing hadn't become so shallow as you lean in and say in a much lower voice than anticipated, "You know... I'm realizing I've never been a big fan of stories." You lightly drag your finger down his chest, stopping to trace over his many tattoos. "Always preferred 'show' over 'tell', you know?"

“I think I know that about you.” He pushes your hair off your shoulder and pulls you closer, pressing his lips to your neck, he feels your body tense for a moment as he presses another to your cheek. “This ok?” He checks.

You exhale loudly, letting out a breath you didn't know you were holding in. You smile faintly at him, the flirty confidence you'd been hiding behind finally slipping. "Yes..." You answer, running your hand down his sweetly concerned face, enjoying the roughness of his stubbly cheeks. "More than ok. I've just... I've been wanting this." You hook your fingers under his chin and bring his face to yours, fitting your lips against his before he can respond to your confession.

Cal grins into the kiss; happy to have the permission. The kiss is needy, he’s nipping at your bottom lip, sucking it, and then he’s moving his lips back to your neck, pulling you against him, grabbing your ass to pull you closer. He pushes you over onto your back as he starts to kiss down your body.

Your fingers instantly thread thru his hair as you watch him move down the bed, pressing his lips to your skin any and everywhere he sees fit. You gasp as he palms over your right breast, loudly sucking a mark just below it. "You don't waste any time, do you, Cal?" You comment shakily, closing your eyes.

“Well... I’ve been wanting it, too.” He smirks at you. “So pretty.” His tongue pokes out, teasing your nipple. “Wondering how you taste, how you sound.”

You inadvertently let out a yelp when the chilly air of the room hits your skin dampened by his kisses at the exact moment he says the word "sound." You both chuckle warmly at the coincidence and for a second, you forget that this is not normal, that this is uncharted territory. You remember that it's just Cal. His mouth closing in on your other nipple yanks you out of your thoughts and you relax into the feeling, murmuring "That's nice, Cal" because you know he likes encouragement.

Cal kisses back up your body, pushing himself flush against you so you can feel that you’re getting him hard. He presses a couple sweet kisses to your cheeks before moving back down leaving open mouth kisses against your thighs, marks and nips decorating your skin

Cal hooks his fingers in your panties and gently pulls them off. He notices your breath catches as you feel him between your legs and he looks up at you, eyes meeting yours to check in once more. You bite your lip and nod. Satisfied with this exchange, he wraps his arms around your thighs, bringing you closer to him and his tongue darts out to lick a stripe down your center.

Cal hums against you as he slowly licks over your clit, “so worked up.” He grins at you. “Can you turn the lamp on? Wanna see you.”

You snort at his request but oblige him, making a big show out of extending your body up and over to reach the bedside table. "Not exactly the type of stretch I've been hoping for tonight, Hood," you tease.

He cocks an eyebrow, licking into you, staring you down. He presses his thumb to your clit, “you want stretch, darlin? I’m sure I can make that happen for you.”

He circles your clit with his thumb a few times before attaching his lips to it. He continues to eat you at a torturously slow pace and you groan, bucking your hips against his face, resulting in him murmuring an unintelligible protest against your pussy and reaching out to steady your wild hips.

“Acting like no ones touched you in months.” He teases. “Fuck, youre delicious.” He rests his head against your thigh and flicks his tongue over and over your clit, moaning. He flicks his eyes up to you to see your face

He sees your lips are moving but no words are coming out. He smiles to himself as he asks a question he feels he probably already knows the answer to, "You ready to cum for me, darlin?"

Your fingers tangle in his hair and he buries his face back against your core, licking, sucking, nipping on the super sensitive flesh, listening to your moans and rambling

He hears you find your voice just enough to get out a strained "Jesus, Cal" and then feels your body finally tense and relax beneath him. He laps at you a few more times before you're pushing him away. He presses a kiss to each of your inner thighs and then raises himself over you, to kiss you, tongue moving against yours with grace, offering you a taste of your arousal, taking away the breath you had barely just caught after your orgasm.

“Was it everything you’ve wanted?” He teases, against your mouth. He drops his hips against yours, needing you to feel him. You pull out the kiss and Cal immediately goes back to kissing your neck, “it was more than I thought, you sound better than I could have imagined. Better than I’ve thought about when jerking off.” He admits.

You press a small kiss to his shoulder and decide you can't get him close enough so you run your hands down his back, drawing him near, "Can't say I was disappointed." You roll your hips against his, eliciting the type of sharp groan you were hoping you'd receive. "But tell me, what else have you thought about?" You reach between you and find his hard cock between your bodies and give it a light squeeze thru his boxers.

“What haven’t I thought about?” He chuckles, gripping you and flipping you so you’re on top, “this has crossed my mind a lot. Bet you look so pretty when you’re riding cock.” He hums, “think about your lips wrapped around me.”

You lean over him and trail short wet kisses all over his chest, "Oh yeah? Reckon I'd look pretty good with your cock in my mouth?" You tease

“I’d be willing to bet on it.” He winks. “Should we find out? Or are you wanting more.”

You both grin at each other like fools as you work together to get his underwear off. You figure you've both waited long enough for this and waste no time licking up the sides of his cock before taking as much of it as you can into your mouth

“No what the fuck.” He breathes

You pull off of him as quickly as you took him in and chuckle, "Thought you said you thought about this a lot, is this not what you expected?" You smile at him playfully while you give his cock a few gentle strokes. You lean down to roll your tongue briskly over the head before wrapping your lips around it and gently begin to suck.

“No, this is perfect, baby, thank you.” He groans, wrapping his hand in your hair. He moans as you work his cock up and down, flicking your tongue over the tip before licking down his shaft to suck on his balls, drawing out a low groan. “Baby, want you on my cock, please.”

You react audibly to his words and lazily drag your lips across his cock and chest as you make your way back up his body. You lay next to him and he wraps a hand around your neck, pulling you to his lips, murmuring nonsense against them. You pull back and kiss along his jaw because you've always wanted to do that and now you can, "How do you want me?"

“Be a good girl and ride me for a little, yeah?” He asks. “Just wanna see you on top of me for a bit, and then maybe I can get it from behind.” He murmurs, holding your neck tight.

Just the thought of Cal bending you over like you've always imagined has you feeling weak and your eyes fluttering shut, "That... sounds like a fantastic plan." You peck at his lips a few times more and sit up, "So tell me, does a stud like you keep condoms with you at all times or are we going with the honor system here? I'm on the pill and like, I know you so I'm fine either way..."

He hmmms... “I didn’t assume to bring any... like don’t get me wrong, I would have thought too if I thought this was possible. But I can be a responsible adult and wait, as much as I don’t really want to…”

Of all of the unexpected events of the day, hands down the most surprising for Cal has to be seeing the wide smile that spreads across your face. Before he can ask you about it, you're capturing his lips in yours again, "Good boy," you beam and then bound off the bed into the living room. He's confused until he sees you rushing back into the bedroom, digging thru your purse. "You know, I've always wondered what your move would be in this situation, although I appreciate you not assuming anything," you triumphantly toss a shiny packet at him on the bed. He raises an eyebrow at you as you toss your bag aside and climb back on the bed. "Don't flatter yourself, Cal, it's not specifically for you, I just like to be prepared," you tease.

“Oh yeah? Just gonna fuck a random mountain man then?” He quips with a soft smile to let you know he’s joking.

"I didn't take you for a role playing guy, but if that's what you're into, I'm down"

“No no, if we're gonna do this, we’re gonna do this as ourselves. I don’t wanna pretend I wouldn’t have you if you weren’t you.” He admits. 

“Another point for Hood.” You grin. “Now, are you gonna put that condom on or do you need a hand?”

"I'm never gonna say no to you putting your hands on me," he taps the bed next to him, indicating you should come closer. He rubs over the top of your thigh as you tear open the wrapper and give his cock a few firm tugs before you roll the condom onto him.

Cal grabs for your hips, sitting up for a kiss and to guide you over him. He grabs his cock in one hand and slicks it through your folds. “Think you’re ready?” He checks, “it feels like you’re ready.“ he murmurs

"You have no idea how ready," you groan and begin to sink yourself down onto him.

Cal groans from the sudden delicious change of your body on top of him and you wrapping around him “can’t believe we’re finally doing this, you feel amazing.” He admits, laying back. “Show me how you like it gorgeous.” 

And you can’t help but love all the affection and terms of endearment he’s showering you with.

You take his hands from off your hips and place them on your tits. He takes the hint and begins playing with them and then you're rolling your hips, trying to find a rhythm that satisfies you both. "Fill me even better than I thought you would," you tell him.

“Oh? So you’ve been thinking about my dick?” Cal gets cocky, and he grins. “You can take it slow, I wanna enjoy you on top of me, I can rail you in a bit.”

Calum lands a hard smack to your ass.

You roll your eyes, partly at his smug demeanor and partly at how much it turns you on. "You want slow, Cal?" You lean back, bracing your hands on his legs. You raise your hips until his cock is nearly all the way out of you and then slowly lower yourself to take him all in again. You repeat this slow dance again and again and the way Cal is gripping your hips along with the soft curses slipping from him tells you the sensation -not to mention the sight- is driving him wild. "This more what you had in mind?"

“Exactly.” He confirms, slowly moving his hands across your skin, up over your breasts, tweaking your nipples, lightly holding your neck, and down back over your thighs, he might be in you but he wants to make sure you feel him all over your body. He bites his lip watching you, “feels so good, pretty girl.” He praises. “You let me know when you’re ready to switch.” He lets his thumb linger over your clit, pressing soft circles over it.

"Ah... that's so good, keep doing that." You moan contentedly and lean into his touch, bouncing on his cock just a little more aggressively. "Love this but honestly just about ready for you to wreck me"

“Happy to.” He guides you off of him by your hips, “let’s get ass in the air.” He directs. He watches you turn over and settle on your hands and knees, wiggling your ass. He can’t help himself as he leans in to slick his tongue through your folds another time, listening to your breath hitch at his unexpected action. “So good,” he murmurs as he kisses the back of your thigh and up to your lower back. “Nothing’s gonna beat the view of you on top of me, but...” he lines up and sinks in, “fuck you feel good.” He makes quick work of upping the rhythm since you’re already so wet for him.

He moves his hips against you, hands alternating between grabbing at your ass and holding on to your hips for leverage. You can't believe how good he feels from this angle and you want to tell him but all that comes out is a series of whines. He seems to get the message, though, since he responds with "Feelin good, pretty girl?" and a loud slap to your ass as he drives himself in deeper.

Your arms give as you drop your face to the bed, chanting and whining his name. “Gonna cum for me, pretty girl?” He teases, rubbing a hand over the newly smacked flesh, landing another one, he grins at your little yelp. “Taking it so well.” He groans. And then it’s just skin on skin and the moans filling the bedroom.

You can't help but move your hips back against him as you feel yourself nearing your end. "Fuck, gorgeous, get what you need," his encouragement sending you over the edge. He slows down, letting you ride out the orgasm at your own pace, groaning at your satisfied sounds and the feeling of you pulsing around him. Once he feels your body relax, he gently alters his rhythm once more, searching for his own release.

He grins, still watching you while chasing his orgasm, your body still moves for him, he’s watching the nothing fall out of your moving lips, your fingers curl into the sheets, it’s when you finally find your voice to say “cum for me cal” that he loses it, holding his hips tight against yours as he spills into the condom.

Cal stays buried in you for a few beats longer, hands absentmindedly rubbing over your ass as he catches his breath. He gives one last "Fuckin hell," under his breath as he eases himself out of you, you murmur in blissful agreement. You feel him affectionately run his hand down your spine and leave a small kiss on the back of your neck before the weight on the bed shifts as he gets up to dispose of the condom.

When he comes back, you exhaustedly cuddle against his chest. He kisses the top of your head and listens as you fall asleep. “Guess we’ll talk about us in the morning.” He whispers, kissing your head again. 

You’re both awoken by your ringing cell phone, cal is wrapped tightly around you, and you have to fight your way out of his arms to go answer it. 

His eyes are barely open as you climb back in bed with him, he scoops his arm around you and pulls you in. “My suitcase came in this morning, they are going to bring it here.” He grin. 

“That’s good, but I was liking you in my hoodie.” He murmurs, eyes closing again. 

“Know you wanna go back to sleep Cal, but, can we talk?” You ask and watch as he nods, “about last night… I want you to know that I hope it’s not just a one time thing.” 

“Could be a two time thing,” he murmurs, pushing his hand between your thighs and kissing your cheek, “are you thinking something else?” He checks, as you push against his chest. 

“I was thinking maybe like… we try… us.” You admit, “if you want to, no pressure.” You quickly sputter out. 

“Of course I want to.” He sighs. “Just wasn’t ever sure you wanted that.” 

“I do, I want that.” You kiss his nose, “so let’s try.”

Tag list: @cocktail-calum​ @1dthewantedlove​ @youngblood199456​ @lustingforwunder​ @calumsphile​ @neso-k​ @rosecoloredash​ @radmcqueen​ @justayoungandwisefangirl​ @itsnotmyblood​  @lietoash​ @pushthetide21​ @5sosfanficrec​ @therealmrshale​ @fallfrxmgrace​ @lukashemmos​ @justarandomgirlthatyoudontknow​ @5sos-microwave​ @madbomb​ @sweetheartmendes1000​ @literally-anythin​ @lfwallscouldtalk​ @clemmingstylins0n​ @ccnicole02​ @lustingfor5sos​ @buteverythingiscopacetic​ @rosesfromcth​ @bodaciousbonzi1996​ @ashtontotheirwin​ @captainam-erika-trash​ @xxgendurvikixx​ @jazzyangel242​ @bluebabycal​ @rhiannonmichellee​ @iovehemmings​ @glitterycalum1205​ @katcontreras​ @cashtonasfuck​ @ificanthaveu​ @kindahoping4forever​ @here-for-the-uproars​ @canterburyfiction​ @opheliaaurora​  @queer-5sos​ @banditocth​ @gigglyirwin​  @glitterycalum1205​ @rebelwith0utacause​  @inlovehoodx

gc tags: @sublimehood​  @5sosnsfw​ @angelbabylu​ @aspiringwildfire​ @irwinkitten​ @lashtoncurls​ @myloverboyash​ @singt0mecalum​

masterlist || ashton || calum || luke || michael

wanna be tagged? go here

[hemmoangel]

Dr. Gay Dreamboat Pt. 1

AN: I am giving the people what they want! Here is my comeback one shot’s first part. I hope you all enjoy it because this series is going to be STEAMY! 

Basically, Ashton is a doctor and Luke is his hot femboy nurse who has the hots for him...enjoy 

Warning:There will be smut and mentions of smut throughout the series! Bottom! Luke and top! Ashton, of course.  DO NOT READ IF YOU HATE GAY STUFF! Also, be sure to like a reblog if you enjoy! 

Here’s the link for ao3 :) :

https://archiveofourown.org/works/29210262/chapters/71721195

Working as a pediatric nurse had its perks. For example, Luke enjoyed socializing with children—they always had interesting stories to tell, and he liked wearing comfy clothes to work every day. He felt so professional in his little white scrubs. He also enjoyed stealing the candy from all the jars at the receptionist's desk. They always kept lollipops or gummy bears for the children who had a hard time handling vaccinations. But perhaps, the most exciting part (for most of the nurses, in fact) was how attractive he found his boss.

It wasn't the reason he had initially wanted the job. He was excellent with kids, and the registered nurse position required only a three-year degree. It paid more than enough to support his dog himself. It was a lovely job all around. The people were friendly, and there was such a diverse clientele that Luke met people from all over Sydney. It was social job with excellent pay; he couldn't ask for more. Except for the fact that his boss was a dreamboat.

They met at the interview—Luke was a blubbering mess. He wasn't exactly the smartest interviewee, so he rambled any time the man with fluffy brown hair and deep hazel eyes asked him a question.

"Are you from around here, Luke?" His voice had hit Luke's ears like velvet. It felt like a question he would receive at a gay bar, but he definitely wasn't imagining this guy at a gay bar during something as important at a job interview. Right?

"Oh, yeah. I grew up here...all my life," Luke swallowed thickly. He watched the doctor's hands, searching for a wedding ring. He didn't find one.

He's probably too busy for a love life, he thought and bit his lip.

"That's great. You'll easily relate to the patients then. They need someone kind and familiar with the area. It soothes them. I think you'll make a great nurse," The doctor, Ashton, assured. Luke had never heard such eloquent words in his life. He wanted to marry this man and have kids with him. But then, Luke realized that he had only answered two questions. Were his responses really that good? He was a dumb twink with nothing in his head except this doctor's dick for crying out loud!

Maybe Dr. Ashton Irwin saw a bright future inside of him too.

After that, Luke made it his personal mission to get on the handsome doctor's good side. Any chance that he had, he would ask his opinion or ask how to pronounce the name of some ridiculously long prescription just so Ashton would allow their arms to brush. Sometimes, Luke could smell the aftershave or cologne that he wore. It made his head spin.

He was always looking for new ways to get close to him.

"Dr. Irwin, I really love the new murals that you've picked for the examination rooms. The kids are going to love all the pretty colors!" Luke gushed, snacking on one of the children's lollipops in the office break room. He sucked it to stain his lips red.

"Oh yeah? I think so too. I was a hyper child, so I'm sure I would have loved all of the mind-numbing rainbow," Ashton laughed, looking over at Luke, "Hey, isn't that one of the lollipops we give to the kids?"

Luke blushed, "Yeah...just one. I really like the cherry ones," he felt like a child being scolded. It almost  was electrifying. He was hoping that his scrubs made him look particularly attractive today. They always did give his bum a certain heart shape.

"That's funny, Luke. You always light up the office," Ashton said softly, unaware that he had just made Luke's entire week. Oh, what he wouldn't do to sink to his knees right there in the break room and risk this man's entire PhD.

The room was thick since they were alone. Luke could hear the coffee machine whirring and the hands on the clock slowly tick tock. He ached to hear more of Ashton's praise. And maybe he was delusional, but Ashton only ever spoke so softly about him. It caused him to fantasize about being the doctor's fem-boy wife. They would have so many kids. Ashton was so thoughtful when it came to children, Luke was positive that he would want a million with him. Plus, what could be better than a man who already knows where the prostate is? Maybe he needed a therapist, but he was only human. When he saw the stretch of veins in the doctor's forearms or caught the glimpse of a sweet smile stretch across his lips, Luke felt true love.

"Yeah, I am pretty thrilled with the rainbow myself. I love representation," Luke pretended to flip his hair.

"That's why I chose rainbow walls. We deserve to be well accounted for in the office just like everyone else," Ashton flashed Luke a sincere smile.

Luke was a puddle. Just like at the interview, he was unsure of how to answer. The love of his life was at least a little gay too! He diverted his eyes back to his sucker, crossing his legs and trying to fight back a burning blush. He couldn't help but hope that Ashton had been flirting with him at least a little bit. They always shared carried good conversation and cracked small jokes between the two of them. His heart wished for the best, but his himbo brain warned him of being too rash. He loved this job, and he didn't want to lose it over an assumption.

But in that same vapid brain, devoid of all thoughts except cock and becoming someone's breeding bunny, he thought of a plan.

Luke was going to seduce his boss.

"Well, our lunch is over, Luke. Time to head back," Ashton threw away his trash from lunch, washing his hands before putting his white coat back on. Luke liked the sight of the doctor's figure in his scrubs.

"Yes, sir, Dr. Irwin," Luke stood, making sure to bend over a little when he threw his sucker stick into the bin. He listened for any sounds of disgruntlement, but all he heard was Ashton's footsteps as he walked to the door.

Luke followed, grateful that Ashton had waited to hold the door for him. Could he get anymore dreamy?

"You're with me in room 5, Luke," Ashton said, "Just a 9 month old's check up, but I need a nurse to help me when they get their first round of shots. Usually when the mums try to help, the baby ends up crying more. No biggie. It's still slow since school isn't back in session." He was checking over the baby's medical record. Luke was checking him out. His future husband knew everything. He had to be good in the bedroom.

"Yes, sir, Dr. Irwin," Luke gushed, correcting his tone when he heard himself. He hoped he didn't sound too smitten already. He had a hard time controlling himself around Ashton, especially when he was talking all smart about doctor stuff.

"Luke, don't call me sir. That's for when we're alone in the break room," Ashton teased without looking up from the paperwork in his hands. Luke gasped under his breath, feeling his cheeks burn hot.

Maybe his plan wasn't so vapid after all.

[suchalonelysunflower]

“Unsteady”

(Ashton Irwin X fem!Reader || Angst)

Summary: Based on the song “Unsteady” by X Ambassadors. You and you husband Ashton, got into an accident. As the months pass, Ashton is starting to lose hope.

Warnings: ANGST, mentions of Drunk Driving, hospitals, coma, accidents (kinda explicit) panick attack, a lot of crying, swear words, death, blood, violence, overall sadness, bad English (not my first language, my apologies)

Word Count: 3.9k

A/N: here I am with another Ashton Angst. Hope you like it 🦋 and remember that reblogs and likes always help and feedback and comments are always welcome! I would love to hear your thoughts 💙 You can check my other works HERE.

”Hold

Hold on

Hold on to me

'Cause I'm a little unsteady

A little unsteady”

‘Her hand is too cold’ Ashton thought ‘She must be very cold’

You were lying in the hospital bed, unfazed. Ashton knew you couldn’t feel anything, at least that’s what the doctors told him. But he couldn’t help but wonder if you were cold. If you could feel your skin becoming more like ice every second but were unable to ask for a blanket.

He would give you the sun if you asked.

But you couldn’t.

Ashton hasn’t heard your voice in over three months, and damn, how he missed it. He misses you, all of you. He often wondered what he’d do if when you open your eyes. Would he cry? Kiss you? Pass out? He didn’t know. All he knew is that he’ll be the happiest man on earth once you did.

But your hands were cold against his. Your body numb in the bed. And he was by your side, unmoving.

The nice nurse came in, he liked her and knew you would too, once you meet her “It’s four already” she said, smiling kindly to Ashton. He nodded and stepped aside to let her work.

He became familiarized with the routines pretty quickly. He memorized the medicines, the sounds of the machines attached to your body, every single technicality. Ashton always hated not to know, so he spent many nights next to you studying everything he could so he’ll be up to date. It became his life mission to make sure you were treated correctly and that you were safe.

“Her hand is cold” he muttered

“Okay, I’ll make sure to bring something warm for her when I come back” the lovely nurse smiled. Ashton breathed a small ‘thank you’ as she left, taking his usual spot in the chair next to your bed, holding your hand.

“You will love her” he said to you. He read that talking to you could be helpful, since you could probably hear him “She’s very nice to us, to you. And she has that ‘loving granny’ energy you talk about. I don’t know if she’s a grandma, though. She’s probably around 52… you would know better. You always do”

His eyes landed on your face, you look beautiful as always, but you didn’t move a muscle. Ashton squeezes your hand, waiting for a reaction of any kind, but getting nothing as a result. He felt the tears coming back, they haven't left since that night, and his voice broke as he tried to hold them.

“Baby, please come back” he pleaded “I - I know you’re trying to fight when you feel like flying. I know you’re there, Y/N. Please, hold on to me. Come back to me” breaking down as he couldn’t contain the tears any longer, he whispered ”I - I miss you”

“Ashton, you can’t be serious” You said giggling.

You were coming back home after a concert. The last concert of tour and you were ready to have your husband all by yourself again. You looked at Ashton as his smile spreaded through his face, making all of his dimples pop out and your heart flutter. His hands were on the wheel, but his eyes kept drifting from you to the road.

“I mean it!” He said with a laugh “Don’t tell me you didn’t think the same thing when you saw them!”

“I did, I’m not gonna lie” you admitted “But do you think we are ready? I mean, a kid is a lot more responsibility than some plants in the garden”

It was not the first time the ‘baby conversation’ popped out. But it was always dismissed, stating that neither of you were ready for that yet. Tonight, however, one of Michael’s friends brought her baby backstage and your mommy instincts kicked in. You were pulled towards that baby like a magnet, impossible to deny how cute they were, specially in a little 5SOS hoodie customized to their size. Ashton saw from a distance how good you were with that little baby that he felt the need to have one of your own. Falling in love with the thought of you being a wonderful mother to your child.

“I know that, but think about it, love. The tour’s over, the boys and I already decided to take a little break before starting to work on a new album, we all want to dedicate some time to our families, so I’ll be around for anything you need. Not to mention that we are financially stable and completely in love” Ashton grabbed you hand and brought it to his lips, kissing it gently “Plus, think how beautiful you’ll look with a baby bump”

“Yeah, all bloated and irritable”

“Still beautiful” He fixed his eyes on you, still smiling “Look, if you’re not ready then we can wait but -“

“Let’s do it.”

“What?”

“I said, let’s do it. Let’s try for a baby”

Ashton’s eyes gleamed under the night sky as he looked at you with adoration. You were both smiling like fools. It was decided then, you were going to have a baby! You were so immerse with happiness at that moment,, maybe that’s why you didn’t see the car heading towards you.

“You should go home for a bit, mate” Michael said as he placed his hand on Ashton’s shoulder. He didn’t move.

It was visiting hours, Michael, Luke, Calum and their girls came today. They always do. Making Ashton company as he patiently waits for you next to your bed.

“I’m fine”

He really wasn’t. His hair was a mess, he had dark circles under his eyes and he can’t even remember the last time he ate a proper meal or took a real shower. But he didn’t care. All of his attention was on you, all of his hopes, his prayers, his pleads, all came back to you and the chance that you’ll open your eyes.

“You’re not fine, Ashton,” Michael pleaded again, but got no response from him “Look at me” He squeezed Ashton’s shoulder, turning Ashton around to look him in the eyes. The same hazel eyes that a few months ago were filled with love and spark, that now were empty and sad “You need to go home”

“But-“

“Go home, Ash. If not for you then do it for Y/N”

Ashton was taken aback. Michael never spoke with such authority as he did at that moment. He knew he was right but still he couldn’t leave you.

“Mike and I will stay with her” Luke said “Visitors hours don’t end until two hours from now. That’s enough time for you to grab some things from home”

“And for goodness sake, take a shower” Cal intervened.

“We’ll be here and we’ll call you if anything happens. But you can’t take care of her if you don’t take care of yourself, you were hurt too”

Ashton felt like he was being cornered by his three best friends. They were right, of course they were. But this was harder that it seemed and he didn’t know if he was ready to face it.

“I- I can’t” he mumbled looking down, feeling three pairs of eyes on him “I can’t go home without Y/N,, I don’t think I’ll be able to take it”

A pitiful look was exchanged between the three men. All of them hurting for him, for you.

“I’ll go with you, mate. You don’t have to go alone” Calum said, extending his hand to his best friend, helping him getting up.

When they reached the parking lot, Ashton tossed his keys to Calum, not saying a word. He was not ready to sit behind the wheel again. So Calum drove them through the familiar streets of LA, back to an empty house that was once filled with songs.

Ashton held his breath when he opened the door and stepped in. It was all too familiar but at the same time so strange. Everything was like the way you left it, the news paper on the kitchen table, next to the glass of wine you didn’t get to finish. The pair of shoes you decided to change at the last minute were still by the door and your perfume invaded the house as a ghost. Every inch of this house had your presence in it, but you were nowhere to be found.

Calum placed his hand on Ashton’s shoulder, something they all seem to be doing a lot lately, as he took in the empty house “Take all the time that you need” and he did.

Ashton walked through the deserted halls, stopping in front of his and your room. He placed his hand on the doorknob but didn’t have the heart to open it, knowing you won’t be there waiting for him like each night. He felt the tears coming up again and his breathing was uneven. It took all of him to step away from the door and head towards the guest room. At least he knows it won’t smell like you.

After a much needed shower, he went to the basement. The basket filled with laundry was still there, you told him you lost track of time and forgot to put it back up. He was glad you didn’t. Ashton grabbed a few shirts and jeans and put them in a bag, he also put a few of your clothes in there, thinking you’d feel more comfortable once you wake up. He couldn’t ignore the pain of smelling your perfume so close to him after so long. He didn’t want to.

He was about to head out when he walked by his music room. The door was open, so he was able to catch a glimpse of a few books you recommended him, but that he never had the chance to read. Maybe he could read them to you, he thought.

Stepping into the room he found thousands of papers scattered around the coffee table. Bunch of scratches and unfinished songs he was ready to show you.

It wasn’t a secret that you were Ashton’s muse. Every song he wrote was inspired by you in every possible way. And you were his number one fan, always encouraged him to do what he loves and to do better by himself. Always taking care, not only of him, but of everyone else. No kindness in the world could compare to yours, no love in the world could compare to yours and now…

Where were you? Why? How could this happen? Why you?

A million questions ran through Ashton’s head, making his senses go black as he ripped apart every piece of paper he could find. Not really paying attention to the damage he was causing as he threw everything in his way. Glasses, picture frames, drumsticks, the drums themselves… all for what? What did it matter? How could anything matter if you were not there?

Calum heard the thundering sounds and cries of his best friend and ran to him. But, to his eyes, it was almost impossible to describe the broken scene that played before him.

Ashton was crying out of rage, sadness, hopelessness and some relief. Letting it all out as he trashed the music room that was once a comfort for him. The tears were mixed with his sweat, grunting and panting as he destroyed every piece of himself in that room.

“Ash!” Yelled Calum as he stepped into the chaos, trying to reach his friend “Ash-Ashton!” He managed to dodge a few pieces of glass and plastic from the broken drum kit.

He reached him mid rage, grabbing his fisted hands with all the strength he could use “Ashton fucking stop! You need to stop!”

Ashton froze as he opened his eyes and found Calum staring at him in fear. Trembling and falling to this knees, he found himself unable to stand on his feet. Tears streaming down freely.

“She’s gone” he sobbed. Completely broken.

Calum let his guard down, softly saying “She’s not gone, Ash. She’s not gone” He grabbed the tall man and pulled him into a hug. Ashton didn’t put on a fight as he let himself be comforted by his friend “She’s going to be fine. You hear me? She’ll be okay”

“We were supposed to start a new chapter together. We- we were going to start a family and… it all happened so fast, Cal”

He cried even harder “Cal, I don’t remember if it was my fault”

“You were hit by a drunk driver, none of this is your fault”

“I should’ve paid more attention! It should’ve been me! I should be the one in the fucking hospital bed”

It was all too much. It all hurt too much. It’s just,, it wasn’t fair. You didn’t deserve this, being connected to a machine, fighting to stay alive when he was the one driving the car. Three months without opening your eyes, without hearing your laughter, or your off key singing. He would do anything just to feel your arms around him one more time, to hear your voice saying that everything was going to be okay. He needed you. He needed you desperately. How could he live without you when you were all he knew? How could he sing about love when you’re not here to hear it?

“This house doesn’t feel like a home without her” He sobbed “I- I don’t know what I’ll do, I can't lose her”

“You won’t” Said Calum, fighting his own tears when the image of you fighting for your life came to mind. But he knew he had to stay positive, for Ashton, for everyone “We won’t lose Y/N, she will wake up”

“Cal, I -“ whispered Ashton in a broken voice “I don’t think she will”

“Y/N?!”

Darkness. Everything was dark and everything hurts. Where was he? Why,, why couldn’t he move?

It took him a second to figure out that you were upside down, still inside of the car. He called your name one more time, but there was no answer. His eyes needed to adjust, he needed to find you. But then..

“A-ash?”

Your voice was weak. Barely even a whisper filled with pain.

“Y/N?!” Ashton called, his hand immediately trying to get to yours. He didn’t care about the broken pieces of glass and concrete that cut through his skin, he just needed to hold your hand “It’s okay, you’re okay”

“Ash” you cried in pain. Squeezing his hand, trying to hold onto something real “I can’t move. Everything hurts”

“Don’t move, Love. Don’t move until they come for us, okay? They’re going to help you. You’ll be okay”

Ashton tried to remain calm for you, soothing your cries by running circles in your hand. “Just hold onto me, baby. Hold my hand. We’re gonna get through this, okay? We are going to be fine”

You could only cry in response. Every ounce of pain hitting you from different parts. It was almost intolerable, but Ashton tried his best to comfort you and you got lost in the sound of his voice, starting to drift away.

“Don’t let go, Y/N. Baby. Don’t let go of my hand, okay? I need you here with me, you understand me?”

“Ashton, I’m tired”

“No, no no no, baby stay with me. Tell me, what names do you like?”

“N-names?”

“Yes, Love. For the baby”

“The baby…”

Ashton was crying, but he wouldn’t let you see it. He squeezed your hand.

“Yes, yes the baby” He could hear your breathing slowing down “You can’t go to sleep, love. Baby, hold on”

He could hear the sirens coming closer, they were going to be okay.

“W-what about Alex? Do you like that one?” You could only hum in response “Stay with me, Y/N. What about Rose? You told me you liked that name, remember?”

The lights of the ambulance shined in the pavement. They were here. Help was here.

“Rose…” you said faintly

“Yes, yes baby. We are going to have such a beautiful family” Ashton cried as he felt your hand gave in “And you’re going to be an excellent mother.”

“You’ll be an excellent father”

“Y/N?”

“I’m so tired, Ash. Everything hurts” you cried.

“Baby no, don’t leave me. Just hold onto me, keep holding onto me”

He was panicking now, feeling you fade away.

“I love you” you said.

“Y/N?! No, baby c’mon. Hold on, please. If you love me don’t let go. Don’t leave me here”

Ashton didn’t feel when the door of his car opened next to him. He didn’t feel when they pulled him out of the car and into a stretcher. He just wanted to know that you were okay.

“Y/N?!” He screamed at the paramedics, trying to find you among the crowd that has gathered around the wreck “Where’s my wife?! Y/N!”

All he could hear was “She’s losing a lot of blood!” “We need to take her now” “I don’t feel a heartbeat, we’re losing her” as he saw your figured being pulled away in another ambulance, away from him.

He yelled, screamed, cried and kicked, trying to get to you somehow. He needed to be with you. He needed to know that you were still with him. That you were okay.

He didn’t feel when they injected him with a sedative.

From that moment on, everyday was the same. Everyday hoping that it might be different.

After the wreckage of your home, Ashton came back to the hospital to find you still asleep on the bed. He thanked the boys and said goodbye, promising them that he’ll be fine.

“I went home today” he said as he sat down on his usual spot, cupping your hand in his, letting your wedding bands touch “everything is where you left it. I - I didn’t dare to put everything back, I know how mad you can get when I move your stuff” Ashton let out a sad laugh, holding your hand even tighter “I’m sorry if my hands are a bit rough, I.. well let’s say you wouldn’t want to come into my music room for quite some time. I’m sorry”

Ashton looked at you. The bruises and cuts from the accident were almost fully healed. Your hair was longer, but it wasn’t as soft as it used to be. Your eyelashes rested peacefully over your cheeks, it was almost like if you were dreaming.

“I wish you could tell me how stupid I am. Believe it or not, I miss your nagging” he sighed “I miss everything. I miss you”

The machine that was connected to your heartbeat played its usual melody, filling the gaps that were created by your silence.

“I can’t help but think that this is all my fault. Everyone tells me it’s not, that I wasn’t the one driving drunk on the streets of LA. But then I look at you and, fuck Y/N, I don’t even know if you’re in pain and it kills me. If I could trade your life for mine I would, darling, in a heartbeat.”

‘“ I should’ve paid more attention to the road. I should’ve moved out of the way or.. I should’ve done something to avoid this” silent tears rolled down his cheek, he didn’t even attempt to wipe them away “We had so much ahead of us… we were going to start a family and I.. I can’t help but think that I took that away from you, from us”

‘“ I need you here, Y/N. I need you here by my side. I can’t live without you, I don’t want to live without you, baby. You are my everything, my Y/N, my love. Without you I’m unsteady, you’re my rock, my ending and beginning, my North Star.. Y/N you’re my home. And I know it sounds selfish but I’m not ready to give you away. I love you. I love you so fucking much, Y/N. Please don’t leave me, don’t let go. Come back, baby. I need you”

He cried through every word, every confession. He cried for everything they had and all that they could have if she wakes up. He cried so hard he didn’t notice when her Heart Rate went up all of the sudden.

“Y/N? Baby don’t. No no no no don’t let go” The beeps were faster, violent, shaking up Ashton from sorrow. Having him screaming at the top of his lungs for a doctor.

It all happened so fast. A sea of white coats surrounding the room and pushing Ashton out of the way and into the hall. He tried to step in again, but a nurse cut his way.

“I’m sorry, sir. You can’t go in there” he said, sternly.

“B-but that’s my wife.. That’s my wife!”

“Sir, I will need you to stay calm and stay here while the doctors work. Okay?” He went into the room, opening the door just enough for Ashton to see two paddlers hit your chest.

Ashton punched the walls out of frustration, almost breaking his hand and making it bleed. He rested his head on the furthest wall and slowly fell to the ground, sobbing his heart out.

He stayed like that for a long time before the doctors and nurses stepped out of the room, all of them ignoring him as he stayed on the floor. It wasn’t until Y/N’s head doctor appeared that he got up.

His eyes and face were puffy red, his hand was bruised and swollen. But he couldn’t seem to find a care. Not now. Not when his Y/N was all alone. Not when there’s a chance that she’s not there anymore.

“Mr. Irwin” said the doctor in a low voice that made Ashton’s world fade to grey, swallowing the lump he had in his throat “Mrs. Irwin went into cardiac arrest. It seemed like all of this got the best of her. Her vitals were…”

But Ashton couldn’t hear her anymore. In his mind everything was pure bullshit. All of this speach saying how sorry they were and that you’re in a better place, bullshit. You were gone. You were really gone. The universe could fall apart right there and there and he wouldn’t bat an eyelash. His universe died with you.

His eyes were an empty void. He could see the mouth of the doctor still moving. But all he could think was you. You and your perfect smile, the way your eyes shined every time you talked about something that you were passionate about. The way you looked in your wedding day and how nothing could even come close to the feeling of happiness when you said your ’I do’s’ How you would dance on each and every concert, cheer him up from the side of the stage, waiting to be kissed once it was over. And now you were gone.

He would never hear you laugh or say I love you again. He would never see you walk around the house in one of his shirts, trying to call his attention. He would never feel you close in the mornings, cuddling until you eventually had to let go. You were gone. And he wasn’t ready for that. He will never be ready for a life that doesn’t have you in it.

“... So would you like to see her?” The doctor said. Calling Ashton back to the real world.

“I’m sorry, what?” His shock was palpable. Voice sounding broken and weak as he was. Lips trembling as he held his breath, afraid that he misheard her.

“She’s stable, at the moment. She asked for you. She mentioned something about a rose....”

You were okay? You were awake?!

Ashton burst into the room without a second thought. Tears falling as he saw you looking at him from the hospital bed, smiling weakly. He stood there for a second, whispering as he thought it might be a dream.

“Y/N?”

“Ashton....”

”If you love me, don't let go

If you love me, don't let go”

[karajaynetoday]

clear eyes, full hearts, can't lose | ashton irwin

image source 

hello friends! yes it is after 2am in my timezone, OOPS. But the inspiration struck, and the writing gods blessed me with motivation and words, so here’s part 3 of charlie rose, ten fingers, ten toes. apologies for any typos, i’m a lil delirious right now. Thank you so much to everyone for their lovely feedback and shares with the previous parts. Also shout out to any Friday Night Lights fans who got a lil kick out of the title of this one lol. Enjoy!

Read Part 1 here | Read Part 2 here 

Word count: 4.1k

Warnings: none

(This is a fem reader insert)

More writing here | send thoughts/feedback/suggestions here | if you’d like to be on my taglist go here

After your quiet moment of togetherness on the beach that evening, you felt more comfortable around Ashton than ever before. Previously small touches were held for longer; instead of accidentally waking up in each other’s arms, you purposefully went to sleep that way; and Ashton’s hand slipped into yours whenever he could manage it.

Charlie Rose still crept into your bedroom every morning for her favourite snuggles, and then she began joining her Uncle Ashton out on the deck for some morning yoga every day as well (which was possibly the cutest thing you had EVER seen). Charlie tried her best to follow all of his poses and stay as quiet as she could, but her favourite part was when the yoga was over and Uncle Ashton used her as a body weight for his push-ups and bench presses, bopping her nose between each rep and earning a giggle in response. Again, a contender for the cutest thing you’d ever seen. 

You spent your days on the beach or relaxing in the villa, and your nights eating out and then stargazing on the deck. You were getting far too used to paradise, and you had to keep reminding yourself that the holiday would soon come to an end. You noticed Ash spending more and more time looking at emails on his phone as your time in Maui progressed, and it started you thinking about how busy his life was about to become. Tour was kicking off a few weeks after you were due to return from Hawaii, which meant Ashton would be criss-crossing all over the US for a few months, before a short break and then heading to Europe and eventually Australia. 

As you watched him build yet another sandcastle with Charlie on a lazy afternoon, you realised just how much effort Ash was putting into spending time with Charlie and making memories with her. Of course, you’d had a lot of Charlie Rose quality time as well, and spent some nice one-on-one time with Alice that you hadn’t really had since Charlie had arrived (naturally, Alice had tried her best to pry information from you about exactly what was going on between you and Ashton, but you didn’t quite know yourself yet, so you’d brushed it off the best you could). But Ashton had barely gone a few weeks without seeing Charlie her entire life, and especially now that she was a little bit older, she was definitely going to know that he was away, and you weren’t quite sure how she’d take it. You also weren’t sure how you’d take it, either. 

Your mind was running into overdrive with increasing anxieties, and you just didn’t know how to voice any of them. On your final night in Maui, after another incredible beachside dinner and a trip to get Charlie’s favourite ice cream, you were folding clothes from the dresser into your suitcase quietly while Ashton was in the shower. You know you needed to talk to him about how you were feeling, but not quite knowing what that even was was driving you up the wall. You hated the overbearing sense of uncertainty. Did Ashton even want something more than a holiday romance from you? You’d only kissed again a handful of times, and despite increasing tension between you, the only thing happening beneath the sheets of your shared bed was some very wholesome spooning (not that you were complaining). Was more-than-friends even on the table? Did you want it to be on the table? Could you handle months of Ashton being away on tour, and the critical eye of his fans and the media? Were you reading into everything too much? Oh god, why were you like this?

You were snapped out of your trainwreck of thoughts by the bathroom door opening, and in your peripheral vision you saw Ashton step out with a fluffy white towel wrapped around his hips. You busied yourself with folding more clothes, but your hands faltered as you felt Ashton come closer, and you sucked in a breath when he slipped his arms around your waist and pulled your back against his bare chest. 

“Why are you packing already, darlin’? We’ve still got the whole night to enjoy.” Ash whispered against your ear, before pressing soft kisses down one side of your neck. You closed your eyes for a moment, enjoying the sensation, before all of the anxiety you’d been grappling with came flooding back into your mind and without meaning to, your entire body tensed up. Ashton immediately sensed the change in your demeanour, and stopped what he was doing. He let go of your hips, and gently tilted your head to face him.

“What’s on your mind?” He tried gently, knowing that you hated confrontation (Ashton’s love for it was a huge part of what intimidated you in your first few interactions all those years ago). 

You sighed, before turning around to face him completely as you perched on the edge of the bed. Ashton sat down next to down, and loosely linked his hand with yours. 

“What… what are we, Ash?” You whispered, not wanting to meet his gaze as your heart started beating faster and faster.

“What do you want us to be?” Ashton countered, squeezing your hand softly.

“I want…” You trailed off, closing your eyes and inhaling deeply. “I want us to be as close as we are, always. I want to have you by my side, while we get to be Charlie’s godparents and watch her grow up and support her achieving her dreams. I want everything we’ve had in Maui, and I want more, but I just… I don’t know how this all works, once we’re back in LA and I’m stuck working a 9-5 while you’re touring the world meeting incredible, probably attractive people, and then I started thinking about what would happen with Charlie if we didn’t work out and I… I don’t know how to make this work. “ Oh god, you were rambling now, but every anxiety that had crossed your mind in the last few days was tumbling out and you couldn’t stop it now.

Ash waited for you to stop talking, and took your other hand in his. 

“That’s all valid, babe. I don’t know how this works either. I’ve had relationships while I’ve been on the road before, sure, but this is different. Because it’s us. You… You mean more to me than anyone else, but I know it’s scary. For both of us.” Ashton said softly, raising your hands to his face and kissing them. 

“Charlie’s going to be important to both of us for the rest of our lives. We’re going to be there for her, like you said, and that means we’re also unavoidably going to be around each other. If we date and it doesn’t work out, we can’t let that get between us being the best godparents Charlie Rose could ever have, because I know we both love that little girl more than anything… but, I also don’t want to let the fear of us not working out hold us back from even trying, you know?” 

Damn it. Why did he always have to be so wise? A wordsmith, of sorts. 

“I know, Ash. I know it shouldn’t hold me back, and I’ve let fear hold me back from a lot of things, too many things…” You paused, as your mind flashed back to the last time you had a serious conversation about a relationship with someone. Someone who’d ripped your heart out and stomped on it several times over. You shook your head, trying to shake away the memories. 

“But I don’t want you to think that I don’t want to give us a chance. I do. But I’m a little out of practice at this, and the last time I tried, it didn’t go so well.” You grimaced, as the flashbacks continued no matter how hard you tried to block them out. 

“And I respect that you’re going to need time to feel comfortable with whatever this is. I can’t promise to wait forever, but I can tell you that right now I’ll give this a chance, if you’ll let me.” Ashton spoke firmly, ducking down to meet your eyes.

“Okay. But slowly, right?” You looked at Ash properly for the first time all night, and his hazel eyes gazed back at you steadily, with a glint of excitement at your agreement. 

“Slowly. I will cancel the romantic beachside dinner with a string quartet, and put a hold on asking you to move in the minute we land at LAX.” Ashton said solemnly, before cracking a grin at what must’ve been a slightly panicked expression on your face. 

“I’m kidding, you dork. We’ll take it slow. I’m going to be gone for a while anyway, so we’ll have to kind of take it slow thanks to circumstance anyway. But you’ve got to let me take you out a few times before then, deal?” Ashton stuck his hand out, and you shook it, rolling your eyes at his antics.

“Pleasure doing business with you. Now then, I should probably put some pants on…” Ashton murmured, looking around the room for his clothes and getting up from the bed to pull some shorts out of his suitcase by the door. You were, quite frankly, ogling his toned back and shoulder muscles, when a knock at the door snapped you back to reality.

“Charlie wants both of you to come read her bedtime story, please!” Alice’s voice sounded through the door, sounding tired and a little on edge. For a tiny human, Charlie sure knew how to make a big performance out of bedtime. Ashton finished getting dressed, and he tugged your hand into his as you made your way over to Alice and James’s room where Charlie was snuggled into her cot. Tonight’s book of choice was from the Little Feminist collection you’d bought Charlie when she was a baby, and you read all about Malala, and Ruth, and Frida, and Rosa, until her little eyes closed and her breathing steadied. You and Ashton took turns to lean into the crib and kiss Charlie’s forehead silently, before making your way back to your own bedroom for one last sleep before your scheduled return to Los Angeles. 

Leaving Maui felt much harder than arriving - not helped by the tantrum Charlie threw when you explained there was no time for yoga or sandcastles. After James had calmed her down and negotiated one final quick walk on the beach while the rest of you checked out of the hotel, you made your way to the airport and onto the first flight and then the second with ease. You’d learnt your lesson from the previous long-haul flight, and Ashton had downloaded a few more Charlie-friendly apps onto his iPad that she happily engaged with. She barely left Ashton’s side for the whole flight, and you started to wonder if she’d sensed his impending departure on tour. Sure, Charlie was only small, but her emotional intelligence was remarkable (I mean, as her godmother you were maybe a little biased, but maybe you had a child prodigy on your hands, who knows?!) and you weren’t looking forward to seeing them bid each other farewell in a week or so. 

You and Alice shared an iPad and watched a few episodes of Friday Night Lights. It was one of your favourite shows that you’d binged watched together one summer, and rewatching it brought you comfort (and a fair dose of fangirling over Tim Riggins, and a recurring debate on whether or not he should’ve ended up with Lyla or Tyra). It was an emotional rollercoaster, and the small town of Dillon in the show reminded you of the one you’d grown up in (albeit a little more Texan, and a bit more enthusiastic about American football specifically). After landing at LAX and disembarking, you made your way to the long term parking garage and helped James and Alice load their luggage and Charlie into their car. You were about to get in yourself, when Ashton cleared his throat behind you.

“Can I give you a lift? You’re just around the corner from me, it’s not out of the way.” Ashton said brightly, pre-empting any excuses that you were about to come out with about you being a bother. You agreed, and he took your suitcase from your hands and led you towards his car that was parked nearby. The car ride home was quiet, and when Ashton pulled into your driveway, you didn’t want to unbuckle your seatbelt and get out of the car. Because that would mean that the magic of vacation was truly over, and you didn’t like that idea at all. 

“Come on, slow poke. I’ll help you carry your stuff inside.” Ashton tapped your nose, disrupting your internal dialogue. You reluctantly followed his lead and got out of the car and headed inside, groaning to yourself about the idea of having to do laundry and all of your unattended life admin the next day, to ready yourself for a return to work on Monday. Ashton pulled your suitcase into your bedroom, and laughed when you flopped down onto the bed and moan in annoyance into the pillow.

“Post-holiday blues, gorgeous?” His tone was teasing, and you could hear the stupid smirk on his face. 

“Not all of us have the luxury of a rockstar lifestyle, Irwin. No more late nights or sleep ins for me. Back to the daily grind.” You sighed, pushing yourself up onto your elbows at the edge of the bed.

“Well…” Ash crouched down so your faces were level. “How about I make it a bit less of a travesty by taking you to brunch tomorrow? Just us.” He shot you a wink as he spoke.

“Just us?” You felt yourself smiling, and oh yes, there were those butterflies again.

“Just us. Pick you up at ten.” Ashton beamed as you nodded, and he quickly pressed his lips to yours before you could say anything in response. You reached up and linked your hands behind his neck in an attempt to deepen the kiss, but Ashton caught onto your arms and untangled them, before pulling away.

“Slowly, remember? Gotta keep something up my sleeve for you, darlin’.” Ashton smirked, pressing one final kiss to your lips and standing up to his full height. “I’ll see you tomorrow at ten. Sweet dreams, babe!” He shot you another wink, and strolled right out of your bedroom without another word. Damn, he had you good. 

Brunch was delightful, there was no other way to describe it. Conversation between you and Ashton flowed easily, but there was also comfort and content in the silences you shared as well, sipping coffee and eating your smashed avocado. Ashton had a few days of final rehearsals and meetings this week before flying out for the first tour date on Friday. On Thursday, you were scheduled to babysit Charlie, and you’d suggested to Ash that perhaps you could go to the nearby park and play on the playground. He’d agreed, and was going to see if Calum wanted to come along and bring Duke. Charlie Rose loved her godparents, but she also loved dogs, especially ones that were a little more Charlie-size friendly. She did not love Calum (yet), but that was mostly because he liked to rile her up with arguments about who Ashton’s best friend was (logically, it was Calum, but emotionally, Charlie was definitely giving him a run for his money). 

On Thursday the sun was shining, so you headed to the park with a bubbly and chatty Charlie Rose in tow (once you’d ensured you’d both slip, slop, slapped for sun safety, of course). Charlie had insisted on wearing her brand new overalls that Alice had hand-embroidered her name and a series of colourful roses onto, and a bright yellow sunhat to match her seemingly sunny disposition. The park was fairly empty when you arrived, and you easily spotted Ashton and Calum resting on a park bench by the swings. Charlie spotted them also, and tugged on your hand for permission to run over, which you gave her.

“Charlie Rose! How’s my best girl?” Ashton’s voice boomed across the park, as he lifted Charlie up into a hug and then swung her around, causing Charlie to shriek with excitement. You reached the park bench and set down the tote bag you’d brought along, and Cal stood up to hug you hello with Duke in his arms. 

“Thank god you’re here, mate. We were starting to get some weird looks from the mums over there.” Cal muttered, pulling away from you and setting Duke down on the ground.

“Duke! My best puppy!” Charlie yelped excitedly, wriggling out of Ashton’s arms to greet her favourite furry friend, who patiently stood still while she petted him softly and wrapped her arms around his neck.

“Gentle, Charlie,” You reminded, crouching down to her level. “Did you say hi to Cal? He brought Duke to the park, just for you.” You gently prompted, smiling encouragingly at your goddaughter, who eyed you suspiciously before fixing Calum with a glare. 

“Hi. I guess.” 

You had to stop yourself from cracking up at Charlie’s blunt tone in greeting Calum, and you could see Ashton doing the same. Cal just smiled at Charlie, before producing a tennis ball from his back pocket and offering it to her.

“Wanna play fetch with Duke, Charlie? I’ll let you have the first throw…” Cal offered cautiously. Charlie grabbed the ball from his hand and bounded off with Duke on his lead, and Calum scrambled to follow her. 

“You got it, Cal?” Ash called after him, half-serious, half-laughing.

“Yep! Got it! We’ll be best friends in NO TIME, just you wait!” Calum called back, as Charlie stopped a few metres from him. She liked to push the boundaries sometimes, but Charlie Rose also knew the rules, and not to go too far from her grown ups when you were out and about. 

Countless rounds of fetch, a few turns on the swings and one too many trips down the slide (both Calum and Ashton almost got completely stuck) later, it was time to take Charlie back home so that James could come by after work and collect her. Ashton offered to walk you back, and Charlie clapped her hands in delight when he let her climb onto his back for the journey home. She kissed Duke goodbye and mumbled some sort of farewell to Calum (which was progress), and you headed out of the park towards your house.

You’d noticed that Ash had grown reserved on the walk, but he was still listening intently to the story Charlie was telling him about how proud she was of Duke for learning how to play fetch. When you arrived home, he set Charlie down on the couch with an exaggerated groan and a kiss to the forehead, before heading into the kitchen to get himself a glass of water. You followed, sensing that something was up. Ashton was facing away from you at the sink, but he didn’t flinch or react when you brushed a hand along his shoulders reassuringly.

“You okay?” You asked quietly, trying to meet his gaze.

“Yep. Just gotta do the pre-tour goodbyes to my two favourite girls. Sucks, but no avoiding it.” Ashton said, his tone laced with sadness. He gulped down the rest of the water in the glass, and set it on the sink, before turning to you and pulling you into a brief hug.

“Time to rip the bandaid off.” Ash whispered, pressing a soft kiss to the top of your head before heading back into the living room.

“Charlie Rose, can I talk to you for a second?”

Charlie looked up from where she was playing on the floor with a teddy bear you kept here for her, and cocked her head to one side, eyeing Ashton curiously.

“I suppooooose.” She drawled out, making you chuckle. This child had a flair for the dramatics. Ashton crossed the floor of the living room and picked up Charlie, sitting her on his lap as he settled onto the couch.

“Do you remember how I get to play my drums with Calum, Luke and Michael?” He asked slowly, brushing the hair that had come loose from Charlie’s pigtails out of her eyes. She nodded, looking up at him curiously.

“Okay, good. So, there are lots of people that like to hear us play, all over the world. And that means I have to go away for a little while, so we can play our music for them.” Ashton continued, and you could tell he was struggling to keep it together. 

“Oh! So we get to go on more airplanes, like Maui?” Charlie said, excited at the prospect of another adventure.

“You don’t get to come with me this time, Charlie Rose. Maybe you and auntie, and mama and dada can come visit me for a bit of it, but I’m going to go by myself for a little while. But I promise I’ll still FaceTime you lots, and read you stories, and you can tell me all about your adventures with auntie, okay?” Ashton was trying to keep his voice calm and steady, but it was starting to waver, especially as the realisation dawned on Charlie Rose and her bottom lip began to wobble. Ashton noticed, and pulled Charlie in close, whispering reassurances into her ear and rubbing her back as she began to sniffle into his shoulder. 

“What about auntie?” Charlie asked, her voice muffled into Ashton’s shoulder. You sat down on the couch next to Ashton, and rubbed a hand along Charlie’s shoulders.

“What about me, Charlie Rose? I’m not going anywhere, lovebug.” You coaxed reassuringly, giving Charlie a small smile when she turned to look at you and rub her face.

“Yeah, but… but won’t you b-b-be sad that Uncle Ashta’s gone too?” She hiccuped, looking at you with worried eyes and a frown, as her tiny mind tried to process everything that was happening. You saw Ash glance at Charlie in wonder, but then admiration, when he realised what she was trying to say. 

“You’re right, lovebug. I will miss him,” You began, pausing to note the flicker of a smile that crossed Ashton’s face. “But, just like you, I’ll get to call him on the phone heaps, and then maybe we can go and visit him on tour, won’t that be fun?” You tried to speak as brightly as you could muster, but you could feel the anxiety and emotion starting to build in your own chest. If only you could get away with throwing a temper tantrum, but alas.

“Mmm, fun. But… how will you sleep?” Charlie asked, confused.

“What do you mean, bug?” Ashton asked, bopping her on the nose which made her wrinkle her face in confusion. 

“How will you sleep without snuggles?” Charlie asked so innocently that you had to stifle a laugh and partly a cry, because honestly, you had no idea how you were going to cope with the next month or so apart from Ashton. It seemed silly, given you’d been friends for literally years before this, but something had shifted in those close moments you’d shared in Maui, and the sense of content you’d found with Ashton at brunch and the park and other places in between was going to be hard to go without.

“It’s going to be tricky, Charlie, you’re right. But remember, you can always feel your loved ones and how much they care about you, even if they’re not with you, right? And you can do anything you set your mind to, can’t you?” You said softly, as Charlie reached over to you for a hug and pulled you closer to Ashton in the process.

“Yes, we can.” She mumbled, giving you and Ashton slobbery cheek kisses in response.

“What does mama say to auntie when I get frustrated or sad, can you remember?” You prompted, returning Charlie’s kiss on the cheek.

“Oh! Clear hearts, full eyes, can’t lose!” She exclaimed, proud of herself for remembering. You laughed, and Ashton joined you, throwing his arms around you and Charlie in one warm embrace.

“Almost, lovebug. Clear eyes, full hearts, can’t lose.” 

You knew getting through these next few months was going to be a challenge, but in that moment, it felt like you were ready for anything that the universe was going to throw your way. 

More writing here | send thoughts/feedback/suggestions here | if you’d like to be on my taglist go here

Taglist: @suchalonelysunflower​ @blackbutterfliescal​ @redrattlers​ @loveroflrh​ @spicycal​ @notinthesameguey​ @metalandboybands​

[talkfastromance4]

So what about a head canon for how the boys are in bed? You can do one at a time, if that’s easier for you!!

I can do them all! It will be undercut though cause idk how much i’ll ramble and this is also just my own personal ideas! (also will be doing it in the order of CALM) ;)

and this is my first time doing headcanon so i’m a little nervous i hope it’s okay

Calum:

i see him being really intense, like focused on pleasing you

LOVES foreplay and teasing

kissing you all over, anywhere he can really

likes praising you but also likes hearing he feels good as well

“good girl”

we already know he’s oral king, like those lips? oomf

and he loves sticking his tongue out so homeboy knows how to use it

to let you know he’s in the mood he’ll constantly be touching you

fingers tapping on your thigh or his hand is on the back of your neck, thumb and fingers massaging lightly

he’ll whisper in your ear what he wants to do to you

then smiles innocently when he sees the blush on your cheeks

fingers you in public, don’t @ me but phew he loves seeing you lose control but keeping quiet

his eyes are focused on you as he’s thrusting into you, watching you come undone beneath him

loves sucking on your neck and marking you up

adventurous in trying new places to have sex and switching up positions

“Yeah? does that feel good?”

loves sucking on your boobs

Ashton:

D A D D Y

we all know it. he knows it. we’ve all been known.

kinky, likes tying you up

and i feel like he likes talking? like what he’s doing to you, what he’s gonna do to you

praising as well

he’s very eloquent in interviews so it only makes sense he’s a talker between the sheets

likes it rough, man handling but then can also be so so soft and tender

rough sex after being away from you for so long or you were teasing him

��daddy’s got to show you what happens when you tease”

i see him being a big sexter? goes back to the talking thing

very descriptive

loves experimenting new things i.e wax play, ice play, toys

will fuck you anywhere tbh

the shower, a hot tub, his car, the dressing room, his drum kit

A N Y W H E R E

when he’s soft he’s slow and deliberate

teasing kisses up and down your body

i also feel he’s really into biting? (I am and since we’re both cancers idk i’m just thinking out loud here lol)

smacks your ass a lot, he’s a drummer after all

Luke:

oh my boy luke

very giggly and fun loving

also loves foreplay

neck kisser. like he comes up behind you and kisses your neck until you melt against him

teasingly slow

takes off your clothes slowly

takes off his clothes slowly

he’s all about the hype and anticipation

sensual dom for sure

loves making you feel good, asks repeatedly if he makes you feel good

praise kink as well (all of them honestly but who wouldn’t?) anyway

likes having you ride him...idk i feel like he LOVES watching you

watching you control your own speed, watches you moan and come undone

he moans A LOT

likes hopping in the shower with you and just loving on you

when he’s in the mood he’ll find you wherever you’re at so if you’re in the kitchen or on the couch, he’ll ravish you

loves eating you out

loves watching you go down on him

uses a vibrator on you to (again) watch you come undone just with that

finger game is STRONG cause hello guitar

Michael:

he is the KING of moans

i mean, how he sings? COME ON

very vocal in bed, moaning, groaning, panting, the whole works

loves teasing your thighs with his beard

also has strong finger game

i feel like he can be SUPER kinky

like the kinkiest out off all of them

he has cat ear headphones for goodness’ sake

so maybe he has cat ears/bunny ears for you to wear?

likes it quick and fast so he can get you off a lot

likes pinning you down

riding him on his gaming chair is a big m o o d

loves having you suck him off WHILE he’s playing video games

and drunk sex? he’s the best

he can go for hours tbh

so touchy feely

so intune with what you like

“mmm” is used a lot by him

talks as well, wants to make sure he’s making you feel good

pulls you into closets at the guys’ houses

tour bus bunk sex HELLO

i see him very loving and then immediately wants snacks after cause same

• • • •

Taglist: @galcalirwin @cashtonasff5sos @wokeupinjapanisabop @myloverboyash  @rotten-kandy @tea4sykes @jannimoeller3 @loveroflrh @iovehemmings @cxddlyash @princesslrh @here-for-the-uproars @katiaw2 @g-l-pierce @fairyintheglass @gosh-im-short @banditocth @dezzym17 @wildflowerxcth @lukeisbaby

[kindahoping4forever]

I’d Rather Be In Love // An Ashton Irwin 5 + 1 Fic

I had been feeling a bit off creatively so while I was on my Tumblr break, I started playing around with the 5 +1 fic format, mainly as a writing exercise; coming up with the overall “theme” and then thinking of the vignettes that would fit in with it is actually a pretty cool brainstorming activity. I don’t know what it was about this particular idea I had but once this popped into my head, I couldn’t stop writing and finished it in about a day. It’s a bit of a departure stylistically (and tonally?) for me so I was wayyyy needy and insecure about it so thank you (as always) to @cal-puddies​ for encouraging me and to @ashtonangst​ for hyping me up when I needed it.

Description: Five first times and one last time with Ashton

Warnings: Boyfriend!Ash (I mean), implied smut (it’s only implied, I know, I’m shocked too), mild angst, a lot of fluff (I know, I’m shocked too)

Word Count: 3,707

Masterlist // Taglist // Ko-Fi

Let  me  know  what  you  think!

————-

The First Meet

“I’d get comfortable if I were you, I’ve been sitting here for 20 minutes and haven’t seen a bartender yet.”

You’re not usually the type to talk to strangers in bars and you’re especially not the one to break the ice but there was something about this man that had you feeling bold. You’d been sitting at the back bar, people watching, waiting for your friends to arrive and he caught your attention as soon as he walked in. Hair slicked, perfectly styled save for one stray curl dangling in front of his eyes, crisp leather jacket and black jeans matched with a pressed button down shirt, impractically left unbuttoned enough to reveal a variety of necklaces and an alluring amount of chest hair. You never realized you found chest hair attractive until now. Huh.

He fixes his eyes on you and any nerves you were feeling are immediately drowned in a sparkling sea of hazel coloring and amused curiosity. “Is that so?” He replies in a voice tinged with an accent you can’t quite place. “This kind of thing happen here a lot?”

You grin, impressed by his smooth way of asking “do you come here often?” without actually saying the unoriginal phrase. “I’m a regular, can’t say that I’ve seen it before,” you eagerly take the bait. “The guy served me and a few others, dipped and hasn’t been back. The big crowd is always at the main bar at the front of the house, which is why I like to sit back here at this one.”

“I came back here for the same reason,” he smiles, sitting on the stool next to you, listening intently to your story.

“Smart man,” you flirt, trying not to think about how he’s now close enough you can smell his cologne.

You’re not sure how long you sit and talk with him - it feels like both a fleeting moment and a lengthy dream. You learn his name is Ashton, he’s a musician and like you, he was here to meet friends who ended up cancelling at the last minute. He asks you about your evening, your job, your life; you’re surprised at how easy it is to talk to him and how actually interested he seems in your answers.

After a while, Ashton looks around the bar and with still no barkeep in sight, he turns to you with a mischievous gleam in his eye and advises, “Keep a lookout?”

You watch enchanted as he confidently strides behind the bar and makes himself a drink. You raise an eyebrow at him and he holds a finger up, telling you to hold on; he reaches into his jacket and pulls out some cash that he leaves under a glass next to the cash register. “I’m thirsty, not a thief,” he explains as if this sequence of events were a totally normal thing to watch happen.

He sits his glass on the bar in front of where he was sitting and then stops to evaluate you for a moment; you feel yourself blush under his gaze. “Whiskey girl,” he declares, letting out a surprisingly adorable giggle when your shocked expression tells him he’s guessed correctly.

He serves your drink and casually comes around back to his seat, no one any the wiser. “Impressive,” you compliment, raising your glass to his. “Bartending skills aren’t too bad either.”

Ashton chuckles and you think to yourself you can’t imagine ever tiring of the sound. “To our friends and their flaky ways," he toasts. You clink glasses and his eyes never leave yours as you take your sips. He leans in and his hand grazes your arm; the feeling is so electric you nearly jump. "Glad they didn't show up, I think I'd rather spend my time with you."

————-

The First Time

"Should we take this to the bedroom?"

"I thought you'd never ask."

You snort at his cliched response and then gasp as he stands up from the couch, lifting you off his lap and locking your legs around his waist in one swift motion.

You were quite proud of yourself for not going home with Ashton that first night, even after talking at the bar until closing. You’d met him for drinks a couple more times that week and tonight when he asked you if you wanted to split some food at the bar, you figured that was dinner adjacent enough that this was essentially a date and you could reasonably justify inviting him back to yours.

You resume kissing as he starts down the hallway, accidentally bumping your back into the wall more than once. He briefly pulls away from your lips, muttering against them, "I have no fucking clue where your bedroom is located."

You affectionately snicker into his neck while pointing him in the right direction; your laughter sets him off and by the time he reaches your room, you're both giggling wildly. He drops you down onto the bed and you start wrestling with each other’s clothes. You immediately reach for his belt buckle but he grabs your hand and sternly warns, "The giggle train stops here, sweetheart, once the clothes come off, it's serious business."

This, of course, only makes you laugh more until you feel his lips on your neck and suddenly things feel a lot less hilarious.

Your hands and mouths eagerly get well acquainted with each other; you feel like you might burst into flames if things don’t progress sometime soon but you also feel like you could live off his exploratory kisses and surprised gasps if you had to.

You bite your lip to keep from smiling as he raises himself up from between your legs, hair goofily out of place thanks to the way you were tugging at it. Despite your best efforts to hide your amusement, he notices and playfully bites at your neck in protest.

“What did I say about your attitude, missy?” Ash taunts, smiling against your skin. “I’m putting in some of my best work here, you’re gonna give me a complex.”

You pull his face towards yours, kissing him deeply and hungrily. “Guess maybe you should try harder,” you tease, putting the emphasis on the word harder, reaching down to palm him.

He groans into your mouth and ruts into your hand. After a few more minutes of teasing, you pull away and direct him to the condoms you keep in your bedside table. You both get yourselves situated and when he finally enters you, you say a silent prayer of thanks to your friends for ditching you that first night.

He’s as attentive and communicative in bed as he is in conversation and your chemistry easily translates into one of the best first encounters you’ve had with someone. In the afterglow, you and Ashton lay there, catching your breath, joking and talking as if you’ve been lovers for years. You’re taken aback by the familiarity and fondness you feel but it doesn’t make you as nervous as you thought it might.

You excuse yourself to the bathroom and when you return, Ash is looking around the room, collecting his clothes that were strewn about.

Without thinking, you blurt out, “You’re welcome to stay the night.” Not wanting to be That Girl, you quickly try to save it. “It’s pretty late, I’m sure you’re tired, probably just want to crash… so… it’s cool if you’d like to do that here. Or, you know. You can go home. That’s cool too.”

He smirks at your obvious panic, walks over and kisses you. “I’d rather stay.”

————-

The First Doubt

“Is it weird I haven’t met your friends yet?”

Ashton’s quiet and it takes you a few seconds to scrounge up the courage to turn and face him; the question had been on your mind but you didn’t mean to let it out on a post-dinner car ride like this. It just happened.

"I don't know… is it?" He glances over at you before turning back to the road. "I'm not being an ass, that's a serious question. Is it? I just hadn't thought about it."

“You’ve met my friends?” You weakly offer, losing your nerve to have the conversation.

He makes a face. “I mean, just a couple of them,” he counters. “And that wasn’t even on purpose, that was just me not leaving your place in time before the brunch brigade showed up.”

You chew your lip, trying to think of how to word your concerns. “It’s just… we’ve been seeing each other for a minute and I think it’s going well -”

“It is,” he interjects, reaching over to grasp your knee reassuringly.

You lace your fingers in his, holding them in your lap. “I guess I was just thinking about it because of the other night when you made plans with me but forgot you had plans with them and I know they didn’t mind postponing but I wouldn’t have minded if they had just hung out with us,” you shrug.

“That option didn’t even cross my mind,” he admits quietly, eyes focused ahead.

“That’s kind of what bothers me,” you say, forcing a laugh so you don’t sound quite as pathetic as you feel. “Do you not think we’ll get along? Are you afraid they’ll embarrass you in front of me? I can’t think of anything I’d do that might embarrass you, but…”

“Baby, no,” he insists, giving your hand a strong squeeze. You smile to yourself - it happened so naturally, he might not realize it, but it’s the first time he’s called you “baby” outside of bed. The car pulls up to a stoplight and he turns to look at you. “You’re not even a little bit embarrassing, they’re definitely going to embarrass me but there’s nothing I can do about that and I do actually think you’d all get along.”

The light turns green and satisfied with his comfort, you’re prepared to drop the topic; it’s quiet for a couple minutes and then Ash is talking again. “If you want me to set something up, I can do that,” he thinks out loud. “I honestly just haven’t thought about it because when I think about wanting to spend time with you, I want to spend time with you… don’t tell anyone, but I like you a lot better than them.”

You grin and lean across the car to kiss his cheek, giving his hair a good tousle. “This is actually probably something that would qualify as embarrassing, huh?” You giggle, trying to finger brush his hair back into place. “Probably shouldn't do that around the boys.”

He flashes you a beaming smile and a light-hearted shrug. “I mean… I’d rather you didn’t.”

————-

The First I Love You

“Oh good, you're here! Can you reach that container on the top shelf with the blue lid? I don't know where the step stool went."

"Happy to see you too," he jokes. "I knew you were only dating me for my height."

"Please, you're not even that tall," you jab, pecking his lips lightly as he hands you the item you requested.

Ash looks around your kitchen, overwhelmed at the mess; he's glad he arrived early so he can help you get things in order. It was his turn this week to host game night for his (and now your) friend group and you offered to hold it at your place; when you insisted on also providing the food, he never imagined you'd go all out like this.

He lightly smacks your ass before peeling off his jacket and walking over to the sink, to turn on the tap and start washing your collection of dirty dishes.

"You should really let me buy you that dishwasher like we talked about," he declares. "Save you so much time and energy, babe."

You press a kiss to his neck tattoo and then hoist yourself to sit on the counter to continue your conversation. "And like I told you, I wouldn't use it enough to justify it," you insist. "My lease will be up next year and I really only need it when I have people over, which is never."

"Well with the way everyone's feasting tonight, I'd say that's definitely going to change," he chuckles, handing you a bowl to dry. "What's on the menu tonight?"

You happily rattle off the list of food you'd spent the day preparing: homemade pizzas for dinner, dips and salsas for snacks, various cookies and mini cakes for dessert. For most dishes, you'd provided both vegan and non-vegan options and had placed them in specifically colored containers to keep track.

Ashton stops the sink and comes to stand between your legs; you look at him curiously as he takes the plate you're drying out of your hands and sits it aside.

"It's really sweet that you went to so much trouble," he says thoughtfully, playing with the hem of your lounge shorts. "You know you didn't have to."

"I know… But I wanted to," you pause a second, evaluating the large stack of containers on the counter opposite you. Your eyes widen and you start rambling, "Oh god, I'm trying way too hard, aren't I? I didn't even think about it, I just went for it, how embarrassing, they already like me, why did I do this? We can stash this stuff and just order something, like normal people would, Jesus Christ, who makes pizza from scratch for game night, I cannot believe ---"

Your rant is cut off by your boyfriend's lips quieting yours. It's a sweet kiss; passion-filled but soft and ultimately reassuring. He laughs softly against your lips, "I love you."

You pull away to study his face, you're not sure why your first instinct is to ask if he's joking but judging from the fondness in his eyes, you know he's not.

He senses your uncertainty and doubles down on his statement. "I love you and I love that you care enough about something as stupid as game night to do all this." He kisses your forehead. "And everyone else is gonna love it too."

You pull his chin towards you and kiss him slowly, deliberately, joyfully. When you're done, you pull him close to you, wrapping your arms around his broad build, burying your face in his neck. "I love you too, by the way," you share.

“Glad to hear it,” he responds. You can hear the smile in his voice. Suddenly, he’s hooking your legs around his waist and lifting you off the counter, carrying you out of the kitchen towards your bedroom.

You giggle, “Ash, what are you doing? Everyone’s gonna be here in less than an hour, we’ve got to set up!”

He shakes his head. “They can wait, I'd rather show you how much I love you.”

————-

The First Fight

“I honestly didn’t think it was worth mentioning.”

“It’s just wild that you thought this would be uninteresting to me."

You take a deep breath. “I never said I didn’t think you’d be interested, I said I didn’t see why you were so upset, seeing as it wasn’t going to affect you at all,” you state as calmly as you can.

“My girlfriend moving across the country sure as fuck sounds like something that would affect me,” Ashton snipes.

“For a few months, during most of which you’ll be on tour,” you emphasize, patience beginning to wear. “Also love how you only ever call me your girlfriend when you’re mad at me.”

“I’m not mad, I’m disappointed.”

“There’s no way you actually just used that phrase right now, you’ve got to be fucking kidding.”

He huffs and begins pacing around the room while you sit on the couch, shaking your head. He borrowed your computer while you got ready for your date - which would have been fine except you’d left your email logged in, making him the inadvertent audience to new messages in a thread titled “NYC housing options.”

“You don’t even like your job,” he says incredulously.

“No, you don’t like my job,” you clarify.

“I don’t like how stressed and upset it makes you and I don’t understand why you’d want to devote months of extra hard work and more training for something that doesn’t even fulfill you,” he says matter of factly.

“The doors this could open for me have the potential to make my job more fulfilling - ” you start to explain.

He cuts you off, “Why don’t you just do something fulfilling in the first place?”

You purse your lips, getting angry. “Well, we can’t all be pure intentioned virtuoso artists like you, Ash.”

“Don’t be mean, I’m just trying to understand what’s happening,” he says, exasperated and scowling.

He sits on the opposite end of the couch, running a hand through his hair. You can tell he’s not just mad, he’s hurt. You’ve had fights before but they were trivial and easily resolved; this was something else entirely.

You inch closer to him. “I promise I wasn’t intentionally keeping it from you,” you say carefully. “I legitimately thought since it wasn’t a done deal that it didn’t matter. I’m just being considered for the program.”

Ashton toys with the rings on his fingers, avoiding your eyes. “But why wouldn’t you have told me it was even a possibility, why wouldn’t you have wanted to celebrate that your boss thought of you for this? If it’s something that exciting and important enough to you that you’re considering upending your life for it, why wouldn’t you want to share that with me?”

“I don’t know,” you confess. “...I guess I just didn’t think it was that serious.”

“It’s serious enough that you’re already looking at apartments,” he notes, jaw clenching.

You’re silent; he has a point.

You exhale slowly. “I think part of me was maybe afraid that something like this might happen,” you share quietly.

“So then you did keep it from me,” he accuses.

“No, I think I was just… procrastinating?” You lamely defend.

Ash is cool and eerily reserved as he responds, “Just to be clear: I’m not upset about your offer, I’m upset that you clearly don’t care enough to include me in the important parts of your life. I share everything with you.”

You blink in disbelief. “That’s not fair, you’re not listening to me at all.”

He shrugs, disinterested. “Tell me where I’m wrong.”

“Tell me you’re not just mad that I’ll be too busy to follow you around on tour like some starry-eyed groupie,” you toss out, irritated.

He scoffs, “At least the groupies are honest about what they want from me.”

You bite the inside of your cheek to keep your hot, angry tears from falling; you refuse to let him see you cry. “You should leave,” you announce flatly.

“Gladly,” he agrees darkly, standing up. “I'd rather be anywhere else.”

————-

The Last Night

“Thank you for being here for this... you didn’t have to be."

“Of course I did, don’t be ridiculous,” Ashton says. “I want to help plus it'd be kind of shitty for me to let you do all this on your own.”

You shake your head appreciatively. “Yeah but going from literally stepping off of a tour bus to loading all my stuff into a moving van is a lot.”

“Well I didn’t literally do that, I drove my own car here,” he jokes.

“You’re the absolute worst,” you deadpan.

“I’ve heard that before,” he grins.

You stick your tongue out at him and then yelp as he grabs you by the waist, wrapping you in his arms, pressing an absurd amount of kisses to your face.

Giggling, you escape from his embrace and go back to stacking the boxes left in the room, making sure everything is correctly labeled and sealed with tape.

"What room do you want this sorted into?" Ash asks, holding up a bag filled with various tubes of lotion.

You squint, trying to see which products are inside. "Uh… that can be bathroom," you direct, pointing to a box to his left.

He holds up a stack of plastic novelty cups. "Kitchen?"

You shake your head. "I actually use those on my desk - that box is over here." He passes them to you and you blow a kiss in response.

You both quietly continue organizing but you keep feeling Ash's eyes on you, studying your demeanor. Finally, he asks, "So… last night in your very own LA apartment… how are you feeling?"

You honestly hadn't stopped to ask yourself that question yet so you use this moment to take a break and ponder your feelings. You flop yourself onto the bare mattress that’s been left in the middle of the room for you to sleep on and stare at the ceiling.

"...Fine? I mean, it's weird," you share, sorting through your thoughts. "Obviously I've lived other places but this… y'know… this move feels different."

He smiles softly at you and sits on the edge of the mattress. "That's because it is," he states. "Bigger milestone, bigger plans…" He mindlessly digs through a box by the bed, you reach out and lightly rub his back.

"Definitely bigger as far as how much I'm moving - how do I have so much stuff?" You joke, gesturing around the room.

He snorts. "I was thinking the same thing," he teases. "See, I should've asked you to move in with me as soon as you got back from New York last year. You could've made do with just what you had in that small ass apartment, problem solved."

You laugh heartily, your exhaustion and excitement making his joke a lot funnier than it actually is. You check your phone for the time and sigh. "Think we should call it, babe. We can finish up in the morning."

He sets aside the box he was looking through. "Well we already packed up your TV and stereo, what do you want to do for the rest of the night? It's still kind of early," he shrugs.

“What’s the opposite of christening a place?” You coyly ask, striking a pose. “Because I vote we do that.”

Ashton smirks, moving to lay beside you on the bed. “Nothing I’d rather do.”

————-

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[littledrummeraussie]

as we burst into color. / getaway series

Word count: 3600+ Warnings: Smut. Again: blink-and-you-miss-it Dom!Ash. Kinda public sex, but not really. Author’s note: The fifth part of my getaway series. Shout out to my friend for requesting this months ago - look, I finally made it! Sorry for breaking you during the process. ❤️  Thank you all for being such lovelies! Feedback is always appreciated, and stay safe all you beautiful people. ❤️ If you missed the previous parts:

getaway masterlist. / masterlist.

The late afternoon sun peeked through the curtains of your little forest cabin, painting everything gold and yellow from floor to ceiling. You’ve spent the majority of your day sitting in the open window, enjoying the sunshine warming your skin as you shared the cookies that Ashton insisted on baking. You played along when he put half of it in his mouth, leaning closer to make you bite off the remaining part, brushing your lips together just for a second and trying not to choke on laughter afterwards. He braided your hair as you talked about music and their upcoming plans, pulling you closer and pressing a kiss on your temple when he was finally done. You wished you could stay there forever, wrapped up in each other’s love and embrace for eternity.

Then he slipped off the windowsill, telling you to wait until he gets back and then disappeared in the direction of the back porch. It was in Ashton’s nature to be full of surprises. Sometimes you could see the exact moment when an idea was born in his mind, his eyes suddenly turning into sparkling orbs, mouth twitching into a smile he couldn’t hide even if he tried his hardest. It wasn’t any different this time around, his bouncing knees and the dimples appearing on his cheeks both telltale signs that he was planning something – and honestly, you couldn’t wait to find out what he had in store for you.

Ashton appeared some time later, the smile still sitting on his face as he pulled you up and covered your eyes with his hands. He laughed as you questioned his intentions, but promised that you will be having fun, you only needed to trust him. With pressing his front against your back he started steering you in the direction where he came from, making sure you’re not tripping over anything on your way towards the porch. Even after days spent in your little getaway house he could still manage to come up with the most unexpected ideas. One of them being…

”A hot tub?”

”Told you I have a surprise for you,” he grinned at you, wrapping his arms around your waist as he pulled you closer. ”What do you think? You wanna jump in with me?”

”Tell me you packed me something?” you blinked up at him, and Ash just rolled his eyes, pressing a kiss on your nose.

”Of course I did. Though you could be naked as well, I wouldn’t mind it,” his hand slipped down to your ass, lightly squeezing it. ”It’s just the two of us, nobody will see you other than me.”

”You saw plenty of me in the last few days,” you answered, but a smile played at the corner of your mouth. ”Let me change and I’ll meet you back here?”

”I’m not going anywhere,” he gave you a wink then started pulling off his shirt. ”And as I already have my trunks on, I’m just gonna get right in.”

”You do that, Superman,” you laughed, playfully pinching the soft flesh on his waist, and he pulled away with a giggle, shooing you away from him.

You blew him one last kiss as you made your way back to the house, smiling to yourself. Ashton really did put a lot of effort into your week away, and you appreciated every little thing he came up with. You just hoped he knows how much all of this means to you – and you hoped he felt that you were also trying your best to make him feel loved.

Rummaging through your bag you’ve found the bikini he packed away for you, and you needed to stifle your laugh. Of course he chose this one, it was his favourite. Ash liked to play with the strings on the sides, untying the knots then tying them back together. It was a game he liked to tease you with – how long can you keep a straight face while he slowly undressed you under the water. You were never actually caught before, though the blush on your face must have given you away a few times. Not that anybody cared.

Ashton was already soaking in the water by the time you’ve got back. His head was thrown back as he enjoyed the last rays of sunshine, the purple bruise still visible on his jaw. He flashed you a smile when he caught sight of you, eyebrows wiggling as he motioned you to come closer. You sat down on the side of the tub, giving him a questioning look.

”I hope you’re not tricking me into an ice bath…”

”You think I would be capable of doing such things?” he leaned forward, splashing the water your way.

”Do you even have to ask?” you laughed as the warm water landed on your thigh, and he just settled back with a satisfied grin.

”I haven’t seen this bikini on you since Calum’s pool party.”

 Calum’s pool parties were famous, and there was only one strict rule you had to keep to: swimwear was mandatory. There was no way you could avoid being pushed or thrown into the pool by one of the guys, so it was better to keep your clothes safely stashed away somewhere, and just wear something fitting for the occasion. Ashton was really excited about the upcoming gathering, saying how it would finally give you some time to get a breath of fresh air and a few uninterrupted hours where work and commitments didn’t matter.

Ash made it his mission to get you into the pool as soon as he could, picking you up in the kitchen when he saw you in your bikini and running outside to jump into the water with a shout. He kissed away your breathless protests when you finally surfaced, pushing the wet hair back from both of your faces, laughing as you pretended to be annoyed with him. Throughout the next two hours he played the same game with you, throwing you into the pool when you least expected it, jumping after you to pull you to his chest for kisses and hugs as peace-offering.

The two of you pulled away to one of the corners for some time, nuzzling into each other as you shared sweet words and naughty thoughts, Ashton’s fingers slowly playing with the strings keeping your bikini bottom up on your hips. His smile was soft and beautiful, skin sun-kissed, eyes sparkling with mischief and love. You were more than happy to get lost in that moment with him, and you were sure he already had plans for when you finally got back home later that evening.

But then a few missed calls on your phone caught your attention, and your stomach flipped when you realized they were from your boss. You quickly called her back, already knowing what she will tell you, and when she ended the call with a “get here ASAP”, you knew that your fun afternoon was over and that it will end Ashton’s happy mood.

”Ash, hey,” you crouched down next to the pool to run your fingers through his hair, trying to get his attention.

”You’re ready to come back?” he grinned at you, hands already sliding up to your waist to pull you into the water.

”I can’t… I have to go…” you sighed, already hating yourself for what you were about to say.

”What’s wrong?” he furrowed his brows, looking at you questioningly.

”I’m needed in the office. It’s an emergency.”

”Oh,” he let go of you to push himself out of the water and sit next to you. ”I guess it can’t wait, can it?”

”Seems like it,” you pouted at him, brushing the hair away from his forehead. ”I’m so sorry. But if I go now I might be able to get back for one last dive.”

”Sure baby, it’s okay,” he shook his head, giving you a half-smile. ”Not your fault.”

He repeated your exact words back to you from that time you needed to skip breakfast because of their interview, and it just made you feel even worse. You both knew these things were not something you could control, but it did not change the fact that you needed to cut your time short with him and your friends. You leaned forward to press a quick kiss on his lips, and he hummed in agreement.

”Take the car,” he brushed his thumb over your cheek. ”Keys are in my pocket.”

”Thank you. I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

”I know. Check in with me?” he asked and you just nodded, squeezing his shoulder.

”I will. Love you.”

”Love you too. Take care.”

You gave him one more quick smile before going inside to change into your clothes and letting Calum know that you needed to go. He made you promise that you’ll be back later, and with that you left his house, making your way to the city and your work emergency. The next time you checked your phone it was well past midnight. You’ve never checked in with Ashton.

 You locked eyes with Ashton as you slipped into the water, and he immediately reached towards you, pulling you close to sit in his lap. He wrapped his arms around your waist and you grabbed onto his shoulders, lightly squeezing them. He had the same soft, beautiful smile on his face like on that day.

”Finally, I’ve thought I’ve lost you in there for a minute,” Ashton pushed a lock of hair behind your ear as he searched you with his eyes.

”Sorry, did I zone out?” you asked, and he just nodded in return.

”What were you thinking about?”

”Calum’s party,” you confessed, your fingers slowly tangling into his necklace. ”How it could have been such an amazing day, but I needed to fuck it up. Big time.”

”Hey now, we’ve been over this,” he tilted your chin up to look back at him. ”We both made mistakes, and bringing them up again and again won’t change anything. It’s just gonna ruin our present moment.”

”I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to–” you started again, but Ash just shook his head, pushing a finger against your lips.

”Shh, stop with that. I want to spend this beautiful evening with you, making new memories. So… no more wasting our time on the past. Okay?”

His hazel eyes shone in the setting sun, making you lose yourself in the different colours of greens and browns looking back at you. You cupped his face as you leaned closer, capturing his lips in a kiss. Ashton hummed softly, pressing his lips back against yours as his hand slid up your back, pushing his fingers into your hair, slowly untangling the braid he previously made. He brushed through the tangled strands, curling them around his finger as he pushed his tongue in your mouth, making you both moan. He lightly nipped on your lips as you pulled back, still cupping his face in your palms. You nuzzled your face against his cheek, laughing as the short hairs scratched against your skin.

”You’re so scruffy,” you brushed your thumbs over his growing beard, and Ashton laughed back at you.

”You like my weekend look?” he pulled you closer, rubbing his scruff against your neck.

”Ash! That tickles!” you laughed into his hair, and he repeated his nuzzling, pressing a kiss on your collarbone.

His embrace and the warm water bubbling around you eased your worried mind, and you happily snuggled up to his chest, leaving small kisses on his chin and face, lightly sucking on the skin of his throat. Ashton’s sighs got more breathy against your ear, his hands on your back slowly sliding down to your waist to pull you even more into his lap. Your making out got more frantic, tongues and teeth working on another set of hickeys, bodies pressed together until you started giggling against Ashton’s lips, fingers slipping into his hair at the nape of his neck.

”Hmm, I felt something.”

”Yeah? What was it?” he pushed his lips against the corner of your mouth, already knowing what you were thinking about.

”A snake…” you whispered into his ear, looking back at him with a grin.

Ashton bit his lip to hide his own cheeky smile, but pressed his hips forward to grind his hard cock against you. You hummed against his cheek as his hand made its way up your back again, back down on your side, then slowly up again, his fingers sneaking under the cup of your bikini top, softly massaging your breast. He kissed away your moans as his thumb circled your nipple, giving it a light pinch as you bit his bottom lip.

”You’re terrible,” you laughed into your kiss, his fingers still teasing your hardening nipple.

”I can stop…” he grinned, licking a line up to your ear to whisper his next words. ”If it’s too much for you…”

”Don’t you dare,” you tugged on his hair with a whimper, pulling his face back for your next kiss.

He was more than happy to kiss you back while his hands found their way up to your neck, his fingers doing quick work on the strings holding your bikini top up. When he was done with the first knot he quickly undid the other set around your back, pulling the fabric off to throw it back on the porch. His hands slid up to cup your breasts, massaging them with his palms and fingers, his lips slowly pulling away from yours to make their way down on your neck, nuzzling against your collarbone. Then you felt Ash wrap his arms around you as he slightly tilted you backwards, lips closing around one nipple to suck and bite on it, switching to the other, giving it the same attention. You threw your head back with a moan and he grinned against your skin, giving one last lick to the hard nub.

”You are absolutely gorgeous,” he pulled you back to his chest, and you grinded against his cock again.

”I want you so bad,” you whined against his lips. ”Fuck, Ash, I need you.”

”Not so quick, baby,” he kissed your jaw as he grabbed your ass, pulling you over onto his thigh, pushing it against your pussy. ”Don’t want it to be over so soon.”

”Ash, I–” you licked your lips as you rested your forehead against his temple, already moving your hips, looking for any kind of friction.

”Yes baby, just like that,” he slowly guided you as you rubbed against his thigh, helping you find the perfect spot where every movement was a delicious little stroke against your clit. ”You know exactly what you need, don’t you? Come on, don’t be shy to take it. It’s the sexiest thing ever.”

You moaned into Ashton’s mouth as he helped you grind against him quicker, working yourself towards an orgasm. Ash tugged on your bikini bottom until it slipped out of the way, making you rub against his thigh without anything between the two of you, the skin-on-skin contact the perfect friction against your swollen clit. You buried your face in his neck and he bit your earlobe, hot breath tickling you as he whispered.

”So desperate to cum, aren’t you love? You can’t stop grinding against me, you need it so badly. So fucking beautiful, baby, your needy little sounds as you try to make yourself cum on my thigh. Do it,” he kissed into your ear, hands still guiding your hips. ”Don’t hold back. Cum, baby. Cum for me.”

It was too much to take – the hot water around you, his touches and his encouraging words in your ear, his body under yours giving you the pleasure you needed. Ash pulled you in for a kiss as your orgasm washed through you, slipping his tongue in your mouth as you still worked your hips against him. You were shaking from head to toe as you slowed down, collapsing against his chest with a whimper. His lips were in your hair as he wrapped his arms around you, fingers caressing your skin as you tried to catch your breath.

”Always so beautiful,” Ashton brushed his lips against your ear, fingers sliding over your hips and into the knots of your bikini bottom, pulling on the strings.

As he slipped it off you reached for his swim trunks, rubbing your palm over his bulge, closing your own fingers around his hardness. You started to stroke him through the fabric, feeling how his cock already pulsed under your touch, and Ash threw his head back with a groan, giving you the perfect opportunity to finish a hickey on his neck. You were both desperate for the other – while you tugged off his shorts to finally feel his hot flesh in your hands, Ashton slid his hands between your legs, teasing his fingers over your sensitive pussy, rubbing them against your clit as he pulled back.

”Fuck, turn around,” he lifted you off of him, pushing himself up to sit on the edge of the tub. ”I need you to ride me.”

”You’re so bossy, ‘shton,” you let out a breathy laugh as you did as he told you, sitting back against him. ”It’s so hot.”

”Come on, babe, I need to feel you around me,” he wrapped an arm around your middle, the other sliding up to your chest to tweak your nipples.

You moaned against his neck as you reached for his hard cock, rubbing it over your wet lips and you could feel Ash grab you a little harder, holding you up against his chest. You pushed the tip of his cock against your entrance, slowly sliding down on his length, taking every inch he could give you. You rested your back against his chest as you let him stretch you, getting used to his size inside you. His lips skimmed over your neck, peppering small kisses against your skin as he slowly pulled his hips back, sliding his cock in and out of your pussy. You clenched around him with every thrust, wanting to be filled up again and again, wanting to keep him as close as you could.

”Look at you, like a fucking piece of art,” Ashton moaned in your ear, hand sliding down from your breast, over your stomach, pushing you down on his cock to take as much as you could.

You opened your eyes, catching glimpses of the last rays shining through the leaves above you, the sun painting your wet skins golden in patches. You let the heady feeling of being fucked like this take over you – in that moment you did feel like a piece of art with Ashton’s arms wrapped around you, nipples hard and breasts heaving, his hard cock pounding you into oblivion. You matched the movements of your hips to his thrusts, fucking back against him until your thighs shook, body ready to come again.

Ashton’s fingers slipped between your legs, fingertips circling around your clit while his hips rocked against you, pushing you towards your next orgasm. His lips never left your neck, kissing and whispering against your skin, his words heavy with lust as he finally lost himself in pleasure, his teeth lightly sinking into your shoulder, cock pulsing inside you. You slid your hand over his, guiding it back against your clit to press his fingers over it, helping you ride out the last of your own pleasure while he slowly fucked his cock in and out.

His arms held you close as he slid back into the water with you, resting his back against the side of the tub, breathing heavily as he came down from his high. Ash pulled you back into his lap, letting you curl up against his chest as he kissed your hair, brushing the wild curls back from your face. He nuzzled closer, brushing your lips together in a sloppy kiss, holding onto each other as your trembling bodies calmed down. You looked up at Ashton, the colour of his eyes slowly changing back to a light hazel, the smile on his face soft and sweet. There was a moment between the two of you as you brushed your thumb over his cheek, and he pressed a kiss against your knuckles.

”What’s that smile about, little moon?”

Ashton shook his head with a blush, tilting his face up to push his forehead against yours, kissing you soft and slow. You held onto him as you kissed back, giving in to the moment. You did not need words to let the other know how you felt – you could feel his heart pounding against your palm, the same fast paced rhythm that made you dizzy too as he nuzzled his face into your neck. His fingers drew wet lines on your back as he breathed you in, and you smiled as you felt him finish the small sun pattern on your shoulder blade.

”Yeah,” you sighed against his hair, kissing his temple. ”I feel the same.”

”You’re the sunshine of my life,” Ash hummed softly, wrapping you in another hug. ”My beautiful, beautiful sunshine.”

”I think it’s your time to shine now,” you smiled back at him, rubbing your noses together while your fingers caressed the moon tattoos on his arms.

”Actually, I think it’s time to get out of the water,” he laughed, pulling your wrist to his mouth, pressing his lips against your skin.

”Yeah, maybe that’s a good idea,” you kissed him one more time before pushing yourself out of his lap.

Ashton held your hand as you got out of the water, reaching for the towel he left on the bench for you. As you wrapped it around yourself he started giggling, and you looked back at him questioningly. He crossed his arms on the side of the tub, resting his chin on them, his smile crooked and full of mischief.

”What now?” you asked as you picked up your discarded clothes, and Ash just snorted again.

”Told ya you won’t be needing that bikini.”

part 1 // part 2 // part 3 // part 4 // part 5 // part 6 // part 7 // part 8 // story tag.

[pixiegrl]

For the prompts, 29 and 15 with Lashton? Love your writing!

Hello anon! This was for a prompt on tumblr for Lashton, in a waiting room with “Is there anything I can do to help?” It ended up being goofier and fluffier than intended but @calumsclifford gave me the idea and I ran with it. Enjoy!

As always it is also on ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26431231

Calum hiccups and immediately starts crying again, loud broken sobs. Luke tips his head, counting to 10 and willing himself to not just, get up and leave Calum. Regrettably, Luke is the only one with a car and he can’t just leave Michael at a hospital. He also can’t just abandon Calum here because then Michael will have to deal with an upset Calum on top of the injury and Luke will never hear the end of the whining.

Calum’s sprawled over Luke’s lap wailing at the top of his lungs. Everyone in the ER waiting room is shooting them concerned looks, but it’s 2am on a Monday so no one is actually coming over to check on them.

Luke’s counting to another set of 10 because Calum won’t stop whimpering about Michael’s “never going to recover” and “it’s all my fault,” when Luke hears someone clear their throat next to him. Luke glances over, immediately embarrassed that there’s an attractive guy with light brown curls, hazel eyes, and an old All Time Low shirt with his hands shoved into his pockets staring at the two of them. The one time Luke’s got a snotty Calum in his lap, his curls look flat and greasy, and he’s exhausted would be the time that a hot guy with good music taste comes over.

“I couldn’t help noticing that your friend seems very, uh, upset. Is there anything I can do to help?”

“Michael is dying!” Calum wails, flinging himself further into Luke’s lap. The guy looks alarmed, taking a step back.

“He’s exaggerating! Michael is fine! He fell off a skateboard trying to do a “cool trick” and landed on his wrist funny. He thought it might be broken, but he’s going to be fine Cal! I’ve been trying to tell you that for the last 3 hours,” Luke huffs, trying to smack Calum upside the head. At any other time, Calum would have latched on to the fact that a hot guy is talking to Luke and tried to drop hints that Luke is very single and very bisexual and would love a boyfriend. Now, Calum’s too worried that Michael’s at death’s door over a small enough injury.

“He’ll never be able to play guitar again!”

“In 6 weeks, he’ll be perfectly able to play guitar Calum.”

The guy snorts and tries to hastily cover it up with a cough, when Luke looks over at him.

“What are you even doing in an ER at 2am on a Monday?”

“Oddly enough, something similar. My brother Harry tripped off his skateboard and landed on his face. Thinks he might have broken his nose, so here we are,” Ashton says, waving his hand around the waiting room. He pauses before sitting down a few seats away from Luke.

Luke feels a spike of heat in his chest. The cute guy is sitting near him! Calum is not scaring him away. Maybe he’s Luke’s soulmate. Wait, now Luke sounds like Michael and Calum and he refuses to be them.

“Is he going to be okay?”

“This isn’t even the worst thing that’s happened. Michael got burned once, totally got half his face and his eyebrows and Calum was inconsolable. I think Michael ended up having to hold him while the doctor was trying to bandage him up. Whenever Michael gets an injury, Calum acts like Michael’s on death’s door.”

“Because he is Luke! How can you say you’re his best friend and then just disrespect him like this?” Calum yells, muffled by the fact that his face is pressed into Luke’s jeans. Luke rolls his eyes. The guy smiles and Luke feels his heart skip a beat. Is he sharing a moment with a stranger in a waiting room? Is he in a rom-com?

“Ashton.”

“Hm?”

“My name. It’s Ashton. Since Calum here said your name, I figured it was only fair that you know mine too.”

“Well nice to meet you Ashton. What do you do when you’re not taking care of brothers with broken noses?”

“Taking care of little sisters who are just the right age where the wrong nail polish color is the end of the world, working at a coffee shop, playing drums.”

Luke perks up, “We’re a band. The three of us. Michael’s guitar, Cal’s bass, and I sing. Play guitar too, but not as good as Michael. We’re looking for a drummer.”

“You guys any good?”

“You could come see us practice for yourself.”

Ashton hums. He gives Luke a once over. Luke goes a little red, ducking his head to stare intensely at the back of Calum’s head. God, he needs Michael here to handle this Calum’s a terrible wingman. Next time, Luke’s going to break Calum’s wrist so he has Michael with him as a wingman.

“I don’t just give out my services for free you know. Drumming is alot of work and I deserve something in payment.”

“Oh? I mean, I work in a bookstore, Michael’s in a music shop, and Calum teaches football we don’t have like alot of money to go around. It’s why we don’t have a drummer yet.”

“You’re in luck because I’m a cheap drummer. All I ask for is a date with a very cute, blonde singer.”

Luke’s startled. Luke’s so startled he’s not sure he’s still breathing and he considers asking the nurse at reception if he’s still alive. There’s no way Ashton’s asking Luke out on a date. This is not happening at 2am on a Monday in an ER waiting room.

“Uhhhh, I would have to check my work schedule. I'm very busy selling books to bored teenagers and very excited children,” Luke says. He’s staring at a point over Ashton’s left shoulder, hoping that if he doesn’t make full eye contact with Ashton he won’t do or say something embarrassing.

“Well, I’m also busy selling coffee to angry businessmen and stressed college students. I think the best thing we could do is exchange our phone numbers so that way we could text each other about our schedules and set up a band practice day. Or a date. Whichever comes first. But just so you know, I know a really nice pizza place around here that I love to take a certain singer to.”

Luke’s too shocked to argue with Ashton. He simply nods, taking his phone out of his pocket and handing it over to Ashton, unlocked and everything. Ashton smiles, entering his information and texting his own phone before handing it back. Luke notices that he saved his name with a little drum next to it. As if Luke has more than one Ashton in his phone that he wants to text on the regular.

They chat for a bit about music, their jobs. Luke tells Ashton about Michael and Calum, that they’ve been friends for close to 5 years now, that Michael and Luke didn’t get along at first until music became involved. Luke shares that Michael and Calum have been dating for just as long, that Luke’s painful single (not for lack of Michael’s trying to find Luke someone). Ashton tells Luke about his siblings, his mother, that he’s just broken up with his boyfriend (he looks at Luke shyly when he says it and Luke grins at the idea that Ashton wants to go on a date with him already).

Luke loses track of time until the doors leading to the hospital wing swings open and Michael comes out, all pink hair and disheveled clothing, brace on his left wrist and a lollipop sticks out of his mouth, grinning around it. Calum lets out a cry that Luke can only imagine wives make when their husbands return from war and runs towards Michael flinging himself into Michael’s arms crying. Michael looks startled, but unsurprised, patting Calum on the shoulder, leading him back to Luke.

“The doctor said it’s just a sprain. I gotta keep it in the brace for a few weeks and come back for a check-up, but it’s nothing serious,” Michael says.

“But it could have been!” Calum wails again. Michael rolls his eyes, fond, pressing a kiss to Calum’s forehead.

“Considering the crying your boyfriends doing, I thought you were on death's door,” Ashton says. Michael looks over at Ashton confused.

“Who are you?”

“The man Luke abandoned me for in your time of need,” Calum says, glaring at Luke. Luke throws his hands up in mock surrender. Michael looks like he’s fighting back the urge to laugh.

“Ashton. Apparently, I’m Luke’s new boyfriend.”

“He’s our new drummer! We’re not dating! We haven’t even been on a date yet,” Luke rushes out, leaning over to smack Ashton. Ashton lets out a delighted laugh. Michael’s grinning maniacally now. Luke needs new friends.

“I would call this a first date.”

“You’re not allowed to call Michael’s trauma a date,” Calum protests.

“If it gets Luke a first boyfriend, it could be my funeral and they could call it a date,” Michael says. Calum lets out another wail and collapses onto Michael’s shoulder.

“I feel like you missed the part where I said he was our new drummer.”

“Oh I heard that but it’s not nearly as important as you getting a boyfriend.”

Luke jumps up starting to usher Michael and Calum out of the waiting room, “Well it’s 3am on a Monday and we have to go now because you are very injured and we should all sleep,”

“You should call Luke he’s very free all the time for dates!” Michael calls over his shoulder. Luke really needs new friends.

(Ashton still texts him at 5am, letting him know that Ashton’s brother is fine and that Ashton is also very free any time for both band practice and dates.

“You should send him a dick pic.”

“I’m not sending him a dick pic, Michael.”

“How else will he know you’re interested?”

“Are you breaking up with me for the waiting room guy Luke abandoned me for?”

“Not when I don’t know what his dick looks like and I’ve seen yours...on second thought, Luke send Ashton a pic of Calum’s dick instead.”

“I’m quitting this band,” Luke moans, flopping face first into the couch.

“Hey, if I hadn’t injured myself you wouldn’t have a boyfriend,” Michael protests.

His phone beeps. Ashton’s sent him a little heart emoji. Okay fine, maybe Michael and Calum aren’t terrible friends. It did get Luke a date with a cute guy.)

[daniellesimagines]

Try It Again (Ashton Irwin) - Part 1 *

submitted by @palayeeeroyale

Trigger warning: Rape, PTSD, having to use a safe word (idk if being in a ‘needing to use the safe word’ situation is a trigger but i’d rather be safe than sorry)

~

Seven months ago, someone had violated you sexually. It wasn’t like you were asking for it; all you had on that day was your boyfriend’s hoodie over a Green Day shirt, and a pair of skinny jeans. And it wasn’t like you didn’t try to put up a fight; it was just you couldn’t. You didn’t know what he drugged you with, or how he got it, but you knew one thing: this guy wanted you to suffer. 

This drug paralyzed you – you couldn’t move, scream, and blinking was barely an option – but your mind was wide awake. It was some drug that doctors used, so you don’t know how he managed to get his hands on it. But you could remember everything: the pain on your lower half, the disgusting smell of his breath, the sound of him getting off to your agony, everything. 

This, obviously, fucked you up mentally. 

You had nightmares every night for months, waking up drenched in sweat and breathing heavily. Eventually, that turned into sleep paralysis – your demon being the man who made you no longer feel safe no matter where you were – and this made you freak out more because the feeling of being paralyzed made you have panic attacks at 3 in the morning. 

But if there’s one thing that’s been the biggest help throughout all of this, it’s your boyfriend Ashton.

Your journey through recovery would’ve been a whole lot harder if it weren’t for him. He’s comforted you through all the nightmares, been so gentle around you, held you after a panic attack or PTSD episode, being more than willing to wait for you to be 100% ready to have sex again, among many other things. 

You feel guilty that he has to basically take care of you – you even tried to convince him to leave you, but he completely dismissed the idea of that in your time of need. He’d tell you that this was not your fault, that you shouldn’t have to suffer through this at all, let alone all by yourself. He’s been there for you for 4 years, and he isn’t gonna stop just because one guy couldn’t keep it in his pants.

You’ve gotten better since the incident. The nightmares were less frequent, and the sleep paralysis barely made an appearance anymore. You were getting less startled by every little thing, and you were able to talk about it more to your therapist without breaking down into another episode. 

Now, you and Ashton were sitting on the couch, watching a movie with his arm wrapped around your shoulders and your head on his chest. Well, you weren’t really watching it, you were just feeling content in your loving boyfriend’s arms, listening to his heartbeat and feeling the rumble in his chest whenever the movie’s characters did/said something funny. You looked up at him, just wanting to admire your beautiful boyfriend.

You take in his features for a bit before he looks down at you. He smiles sweetly and lovingly at you, and you at him. You both lean in to kiss each other, a quick but loving peck, before pulling away only a few inches away from your faces. Your eyes flicker down to his lips before meeting his again, and he does the same. 

You both lean in again, but this kiss lasted longer. It wasn’t teeth-bumpingly aggressive, but it was passionate and slow. He carefully rests his hands on your waist, and you give him the okay to continue by wrapping your hands around his neck. He pulls you onto his lap, and you lick his bottom lip so make this kiss deeper. You two explore each other’s mouths for a bit when a feeling you hadn’t felt in a long time started to build up.

Desire, lust, want, longing, horny – whatever you wanted to call it.

You tug on the hairs on the nape of Ashton’s neck, causing him to let out a deep groan, before backing away. You chase after his lips, this kiss lasting shortly before he pulls away again.

“Baby, we need to stop here,” he giggles. He isn’t mad about having to stop, he just wants you to feel safe.

“But I don’t wanna stop,” you inform him. He furrows his eyebrows in confusion.

“But-”

“I think I wanna try again.” 

His eyes widen in shock, “Baby, are you sure? I don’t want you to do this for me, I want you to-”

“This isn’t just for you,” you say truthfully. Though you did feel bad that you’ve been depriving him of sex for over half a year, you also wanted to be close to him again. “I really want to do this.”

He looks at you hesitantly, still unsure if he should let this continue. You kiss him deeply, grinding down on his lap, cutting off his thoughts and making him groan again.

“Okay, okay!” he giggles at your eagerness. You laugh along with him. “But as soon as you’re feeling even the slightest bit uncomfortable, you promise me you safe-word out,” he says seriously.

You nod, “I promise.”

“Pinky swear?” he holds out his pinky finger. You take one of your hands that were on the back of his neck and wrap your little finger around his.

“Pinky swear.”

“Ok, you remember the safe word?”

“Red light?”

“Yes. Now if you feel the need to stop at all, you yell that out, ok?”

“Okay,” he smiles at you, leaning back in once more to continue your makeout session.

His tongue immediately entered your mouth and you continued your grinding, wanting to hear more of his sexy noises. You felt his hardening length grow underneath your butt as he runs his hands up and down your body.

He puts his hand underneath your bottom and lifts you up off the couch. Without ever disconnecting your lips, he carries you to your shared bedroom. He drops you both on the bed, putting himself on top of you. He pulls away to kiss you down your neck. 

The feeling of another person on you gives you an unsettling feeling. You shake it off quickly though, not wanting to stop this early on. Ashton starts sucking and licking on that one spot on your neck that causes you to moan out.

“Ash,” you breathe out. He looks at you with a smile.

“I’m gonna take your shirt off, okay?” he states. He wants to make sure that you know exactly what he’s doing, so you aren’t surprised or scared at all. You nod and sit up. He threw your shirt off into some corner of the room before asking, “Are you okay? Still wanna continue?” You nod and he returns to your lips. 

You start to unbutton his shirt, him shrugging it off as soon as the last button was undone. You two keep shedding clothes until you were both nude, him in between your legs with his length in his hand.

This picture brings back that unsettling feeling. The feeling was accompanied by an image – an image you’ve been trying to forget for seven months. But when he asks “Are you sure?” again, you ignore the feeling and nod to him, wanting to be physically close to the love of your life once again.

He pushes himself in and lets out a guttural moan. You bury your head in his shoulder so he doesn’t see the discomfort in your face and the tears in your eyes. You try your best to fight the memories and just let yourself enjoy the moment, but it was a losing battle. You didn’t want to stop for Ashton’s sake but you were close to another episode. You had to get out of this. You didn’t want this anymore. You need it to stop.

“Y/N…” Ashton moans.

“R-Red light!” you cry, “Red light! Red light! P-Please stop! I can’t!” 

Ashton immediately pulled out and threw himself to the opposite end of the bed as soon as you used your safe word. He was no longer erect – his body is now full of pure concern for you, who’s crying into your hands. He doesn’t try to come closer, knowing that the last thing you want right now is to be touched. So he just sits there; watching the women he loves sob and hiccup because of him and her traumatic past.

“Y/N? Baby, do… Do you want me to leave you alone for a second…?” he asks softly. 

He isn’t hurt when you nod your head. He understands that you need a minute to collect your thoughts. He stands up off the bed and puts his underwear and sweatpants back on. 

“Okay, princess, I’ll be in the living room, alright?” You nod again, and he sighs.

He wants nothing more than to hold you and tell you how much he loves you. But he knows that doing that may make this worse, so he quietly exits the door with glossy eyes.

You sit curled up, naked on your bed, crying and whimpering for a few moments. When you finally manage to calm yourself down, you let out a final sniff and wipe your wet hands on the sheets below you. 

You put on your underwear after finding the place that Ash had tossed them, put on one of his button-down polka-dotted shirts. Looking at yourself in the mirror, you wipe off the wet stains on your face and brush away the hair that stuck to your forehead and cheeks. You muster up the strength to walk out the bedroom with your arms wrapped around yourself.

When you walk in the living room, you see your shirtless boyfriend standing behind the couch with a glass of water in his hand, watching the movie that you two had left on. Or maybe it was another movie that had been on autoplay. You honestly didn’t know.

You walk over silently to stand behind him, and wrap your arms around his waist and resting your cheek on his back between his shoulder blades. He lets out a breath of relief, glad you aren’t mad or scared of him. But the next words that you said nearly stunned him to silence.

“I’m so sorry,” you whisper, choking up again. He leans over the couch – making you release him – and rests his glass on the cushion, not really caring if it spilled since it was just water. He spun around and wrapped you up tightly in a hug.

“Princess, you have no reason to apologize. I’m not upset that we had to stop, not even a little bit,” he rubs your back as you press your face into his collar bone, “In fact-” He pushes you back slightly by your shoulders. “-I’m extremely proud of you.” You raise an eyebrow in confusion as he continued. “I was so afraid that you wouldn’t say anything and just let me continue. That you weren’t gonna push me off for my sake,” he pushes some of your hair behind your ear, “I don’t wanna be the one who scares you, or puts you in pain. You know that. If I found out that I came inside you when you were silently suffering, I’d never forgive myself. I’m so glad you ‘red-light’-ed out, baby. Please never be afraid to tell me that you’re uncomfortable.” As he tells you this, you see tears build up in his eyes before a few fell down his face.

“But… But what if I’m never ready?” you swallow thickly.

“Then me and righty are about to get really reacquainted,” he jokes, shaking his right hand in the air, making you laugh that beautiful laugh he loves so much. 

He can’t wait to make you laugh for the rest of your lives. But until then, he has to worry about jumping over this hurdle before he tries the next one.

Part 2

[jawnjendes]

try new things! | 3. confident

Ashton talks you into having a threesome with each band member.

AN: im gonna be deadass here. i published the masterlist on accident and it got notes, as well as the 2 previous chapters. so now here i am again, 3 years after the last chapter was posted. enjoy it fuckos.

previous | next

It was much easier getting in the mood next time around. Ashton invited the guys over for video games, pizza, and beer. Calum gave me a friendly wink and looked at me for longer than usual throughout the night. The stolen glances were a little exciting, given that some of the heat was still lingering. Calum's time was up, though. It was only one guy for one night and that was it. However, it did feel like the threesome thing was the elephant in the room, even when we were all distracted by Super Smash Bros. They all knew it was going to happen at one point, I just wished I knew how eager Michael and Luke were, if either of them were thinking about it and getting excited butterflies.

That thought was answered very fast that night.

“What was it like, Calum?” asked Michael at one point when the alcohol was seeping into our systems. Tipsy or sober, I did sort of expect that from him.

“Doing what?”

Michael pointed at me as he slouched in his seat, clearly at ease.

Calum’s eyes went to Ashton’s. It was like before, when he was silently asking for permission to defile me. Ashton, who had his arm firmly around me, quirked an eyebrow before speaking.

"Ask her, not me."

And so brown eyes locked onto mine. I nodded once, trying to be as stone faced as Ashton and failing at it.

“You’ll have to wait and see,” Calum finally replied as he turned back to Michael, grinning like he was in on the biggest secret.

He sighed. “I wanna know!”

“Why don’t you ask her, then?” Luke suggested.

“Yeah, Michael,” I egged on, feeling confident thanks to the liquid courage. “Or better yet, why don’t you come find out for yourself?”

Ashton suddenly placed his free hand on my upper arm, making me look at him. “You sure you wanna do this now?”

I nodded, looking him dead in the eye. I was inebriated to the point where I felt like I could take charge and not care about the repercussions from the guy who was always in charge. I was definitely looking forward to the during and after of it all. How often does a boyfriend of mine have hot friends that I can consensually fuck?

I looked back at Michael, who was now sitting up straight, eyes wide with anticipation. Didn’t have to ask him twice.

“When am I gonna get fucked, though?” Luke whined, breaking the tension in the room.

That little moment where he sighed and slouched distracted me for a moment. I looked at Luke, but he was looking up at the ceiling. Was he just horny or did he actually want me? Did he have an awkward-but-not-really dream about me too?

“We’ll get to you,” Ashton suddenly replied, squeezing my upper arm. “Trust me, she’s not going to let me forget about you.”

If I wasn’t reeled back in by my boyfriend, I would have been blushing redder than a tomato. Instead, Luke did it for me, which was endearing.

“Well,” I said, standing up. “Shall we?”

Michael was quicker than Ashton. He walked over and grabbed my hand, pulling me into the bedroom, my boyfriend quickly following after us. Once the door was shut, they both got their hands on me, Ashton behind me and Michael in front of me.

“Couldn’t be patient, could you?” Ashton growled in my ear, his big hands running up my shirt.

I bit down on my lip at his words. I reached towards Michael’s collar, unbuttoning his flannel while he began feeling under my skirt. He had a smirk on his face as he closed the gap between us, while Ashton kept talking in my ear.

"You were supposed to wait until our guests left, baby," he sternly told me. "But you couldn't keep your legs closed, huh? Michael, you wanna take her to the bed?"

The man in question had his fingers hooked around my panties, but paused his actions upon the command. It was odd in the sense that two out of the three friends seemed to comply with Ashton's needs in a situation like this. Almost like they had done this before. Was Luke going to be the same way?

I didn't think about it much as Michael's gentle hand took mine and walked me over to the king size bed. I was already dazed, I didn’t even take a second glance at the armchair where Calum and I fucked the week before, and I did that a lot since that event.

Also, it made sense why Ashton got us a king size bed not too long ago. If he hasn't had a threesome before dating me, then he's definitely thought about it and wanted to be prepared for it.

"I'll be right back," Ashton said. "Don't have too much fun without me." He stepped out, but then ducked his head back in the room. "And don't kiss each other."

As soon as the door closed, the tension heightened. It seems as though I was the only one to feel it. Michael was sat on the bed and pulling me towards him, hands around my wrists and then the backs of my thighs as I got closer.

"You nervous?" he asked me like he wasn't groping my ass.

"No," I replied a little too quietly. I really wasn't. Most of the nerves were let out the first time I had sex with a different man while my boyfriend watched.

Michael seemed to like my docile tone, smiling and leaning in. For a hot second, I thought he was about to do what Ashton said not to, but his nose just ran along my jawline instead. Then, he scooted back on the bed, beckoning me to follow. I practically crawled over him as he moved back, and then I was properly straddling him.

"Think you can handle being on top?" he teased.

"Think you can handle me?" I replied, gently pushing his chest so he was laying back.

My little burst of confidence quickly dissipated as the door opened. I jumped, somehow forgetting that there was someone else who was supposed to be here. I looked back and saw Ashton entering the room again, and I smiled timidly.

Michael chuckled at my reaction, his hands moving up my thighs. He took my dress with him, lifting it up. Ashton crawled onto the bed behind me, reaching over to take my dress off the rest of the way.

I was left half naked while the two men with me were still fully clothed. It left my core leaky and hot for more. Just the fact that I was sitting on Michael's crotch, eager to make him hard was adding to it.

"I had to make our guests leave early," Ashton told me as his hands went on my shoulders. "All because your naughty pussy couldn't wait another day."

His breath touched my neck, making a chill go down my spine. I looked to the side, knowing Michael was looking up at me with a smug grin. Just a minute ago, I was so confident and ready to ride him into oblivion. Now I was being put into my place because I was horny via tequila.

"You wanna do the honors, Michael?" Ashton said as he grabbed the back end of my panties and pulled them down.

Then, he was pushing me forward, so I was lying on top of Michael completely. Still, I had the least amount of power here. My bare ass was out, and Michael didn't even hesitate to slap the cheek.

I didn't know what to do but hide my face in his neck. It was only going to get more deliciously painful from here.

Ashton and Michael took turns spanking me. With each one I was digging my nails deeper into Michael's shoulders, almost tearing at his shirt. I groaned and bit into the crook of his neck, which made his hips buck up into mine. He did it once, and then I was lurching forward every time a spank landed, keeping the friction going. I could feel his erection growing the longer we kept at it, and all I wanted to do was ride him until my legs gave out.

"Have you had enough?" Ashton asked when I was whimpering. His hands were groping the curve of my ass, almost like he was soothing the sting.

"Mhm," I mumbled from the crook of Michael's neck.

"Don't think he heard you," Michael cooed, gently nudging me to sit up.

So I did. I pushed myself up on my arms, only to be pulled back further by my ponytail. Then, Ashton's hot breath was on my neck.

"I asked you a question," he growled while his free hand went for the clasp on my bra. "And I expect you to use your words."

"I'm sorry," I mumbled, humiliated but so turned on at the same time.

"Yeah, I bet you are." His large hand moved to my stomach, trailing up to grab a breast. "You gonna give my friend here what he came here for?"

"Yes," I replied. "Yes, I want to."

"Good girl. You know what to do."

My ponytail was released so I could look down and undo Michael's jeans. I could feel his eyes on me as I felt his hard cock rubbing between my legs. It was just as thrilling as last time, being watched as I fucked another man.

Ashton helped move my panties to the side as I sat up on my knees. Michael's breathing quickened as he met my core, and we both sighed when I sank down on him. We sat like that for a moment, while Ashton got his mouth on my neck. It was the push I needed to start moving slowly.

But I couldn't do it sitting up straight, as much as I wish I had that talent. I shrugged Ashton away to lean forward, planting my hands down on either side of Michael's body, and I went to town.

"Fuck," Michael breathed out, then he picked his head up to plant his face in my chest. He got his mouth around a nipple, and it set my entire body on fire.

How I wanted to look back and watch Ashton's face. Was he upset that I pushed him away? Was he turned on by my little bursts of boldness? Surely, he had to be getting off on what was happening in front of him.

"Mm," I groaned, as I found the right spot. I went slow at first, enjoying the sensation.

The feeling was fleeting, as always, because someone always had to be in control. Suddenly, I was flying backwards, losing my rhythm as a hand went around my neck.

Yeah, Ashton didn't like being challenged.

"You dirty fucking girl," he growled in my ear. "Did I say you could move? Did I say you could fuck my friend the way you wanted?"

"I'm sorry," I choked out, my hand frantically going for his wrist.

Ashton quickly deflected the movement. "Nope. Michael, grab her hands."

Then, my hands were being held down on Michael's abdomen. His grip was just as tight as Ashton's. I couldn't move at all. I might as well have been tied up.

"Think you can fuck her like this?"

"Fuck yeah."

I whined as I was filled up again, it wasn't as slow or as mind blowing as when I was in control. I couldn't look around to see Michael's face, nor Ashton's. Still, it was hot as fuck, being held down and used, and I wanted more of it. I gave an experimental tug at Michael's grip, just to see.

"Mm, no you don't," he chastised, tugging back twice as hard.

"How cute, you think you can break free," Ashton mumbled in my ear. His free hand reached down to pinch my ass cheek, followed by a harsh spank. "Not here, babygirl. You need to earn it."

I whimpered once again. I didn't even try to wiggle my hips, the only thing I was able to move. Ashton still had his hand on my ass, which meant he was very close to physically restraining me even more. I moaned quietly, while Ashton and Michael were filling up the room with their noises. Ashton wasn't even fucking me, he just got off on restraining me while one of his friends did the fucking.

But I knew, once this part was over, Ashton was going to be insatiable. Just like last time.

"Okay, let her go," he ordered after a while. Then, he took my waist. "Here babygirl, face me."

I was pulsating between my legs as I removed myself. My heart pounded when my eyes met Ashton's once again. He watched me as I grabbed Michael by the base and sank down on him again.

"Michael, hold onto her," my boyfriend said darkly. "And let her fucking have it."

There was no time to breathe, as his cock pounded into me. I let out a loud moan and squeezed my eyes shut, bracing myself on the mattress, until Ashton took my hands and placed them on his shoulders.

My eyes opened, and I saw the look on his face change. I could barely process it before he was leaning in to kiss me. It was tender, a complete turn from the harsh front he usually put on in the bedroom. The sudden softness almost made me forget that there was a third person in the room.

"Baby," Ashton mumbled, cupping my face.

His thumb rubbed my bottom lip, and I opened my mouth and gently suckled on the tip. Then, Michael thrusted in a particularly intense way, and I groaned against the digit, almost biting into it.

And just like that, the soft moment was over. Ashton's hand was around my neck again, and Michael was growling as he got closer to his end. He grabbed my ass, nails digging into the flesh while Ashton brought his lips down to my nipples, only driving me more wild. I keened and moaned, my thighs shaking the more I tried to clench them together. My toes curled, feeling the coil in my body tighten every second.

"Fuck, oh fuck," Michael growled. "I'm gonna come…"

"Okay, okay, stop moving," Ashton told him.

Michael stilled and pulled out, his breath heavy and shaky. I felt the same way, except I was not as close to orgasm as he was.

Next thing I knew, I was deepthroating his cock, with Ashton holding the back of my head to make sure I didn't move. I choked around the girth so much that my eyes teared up, I wasn't sure I'd be able to see it through.

But Michael certainly did.

"Oh, oh fuck!" he cried out, his hips moving erratically. He let out long, guttural moans while he spilled down my throat. "Aahh, fuck yeah. Fucking take it all."

I moaned around his cock, trying to lap up what I could. However, once I was let go, I was drooling his cum, and Ashton saw it.

He just scooped up whatever he could with his finger and got back into my mouth. "We'll try that again in a minute."

At first, I thought he meant that I was going to have another go with Michael. Then, I realized my ass was pressed up against Ashton's crotch. He was still rock hard, and only the first half of the night was done.

[nightwingshero]

Rosemary, abatina, dill, hollyhock, and sweet pear for whoever you feel like talking about! 💜

Thank you, hun!!! I did a mixture, because I’m missing some old OCs of mine, and some need serious development. Yeah, so it got really long, I am so sorry!

Rosemary: What's their fondest memory?

Blair: It would probably be laying out in the backyard with her dad while they watched the stars, or her dad buying her that nice telescope that he’d use with her. It meant a lot to her that her parents indulged when it came to her interests, they were always supportive. Most of her time was spent at aquariums, the observatory, zoos, and just doing a lot of stuff with her parents. Science fairs were always a blast, because her parents would help. 

Emma: This would be either her and her brother Mark playing in the pond they had or playing football on the beach in the summer. Em would also work on an old Mustang, one she’s still helping him build, and Ash would come over most days and they would all just have a huge dinner in the backyard. Georgia gave decent weather for it. Most of her fondest memories are with her family or Ashton, because they grew up together and did a lot together when Emma’s family moved there. A beautiful, sunny day in Summer always takes her back. 

Quinn: There were times where they would travel back to Russia to visit the remaining members of his mother’s family, and he would love it. Quinn absolutely adored his babushka, and the stories she would tell. His mother would tell the same tales, but it wasn’t the same as how his babushka would tell it. There was also sailing with his father. That was something Quinn thoroughly enjoyed, and it was something they continued on doing until his father died. 

Wren: Definitely playing piano with her mother! That is probably the most precious moment for her. When she plays it now, she still feels as if her mother is there with her. Not only that, but her music teacher was her one good thing growing up. Mrs. Hall taught Wren how to actually play, and when Wren would sneak to lessons (under the guise of studying or going to the library), Mrs. Hall would often bake cookies and brownies for Wren, as if she were her own grandmother. Wren attended her funeral when she passed, and it actually felt like she had lost her grandmother when she heard. But those are memories she holds dear. 

Abatina: Are they very picky or particular about anything?

Blair: Not really, no. Blair is rather easy going and goes with the flow. I think the one thing would be don’t touch her work station. It’s organized chaos with an actual system that only she knows, and she will absolutely lose it if you mess with anything because that’s her life’s work you’re messing with. I think that could be said for any scientist though, and she is very verbal about it. It’s a light reminder, or a happy request until you get too close and she becomes slightly frazzled and makes you keep your distance. 

Emma: She can be an absolute control freak and has to have things a certain way (whether that’s because she was in the Marines or if she inherited it from her mother, who’s to say?) No eating in her cars, don’t touch her guns, and if you’re going along with her on something, you’re following her lead. Ashton, Nora, and even Roach give her hell for it, but honestly? Sometimes she can’t help it. Emma has a habit of taking control of a situation when it calls for it and she’s a super organized and neat person. Everything has it’s place, things are cleaned or done a certain way, and she would rather just do it herself. 

Quinn: His hair and shoes. Listen, Quinn is very boyish in looks (there’s a reason Ryan Gosling is his faceclaim) and his hair is usually neat or done how he wants it. He’s not overbearing about it, he just takes his time with it because he does put care into his appearance. His shoes are shined, his clothes match and his outfit is sharp, he doesn’t go more than a few days without shaving. Once the Collapse happens, it’s one of the things he can control, so he does. Grayson often jokes he’s the prettiest guy of Armageddon, but Quinn laughs with him. 

Wren: She doesn’t like it when other people drive. Having been in a traumatizing car accident, she prefers to be at the wheel for that sense of control. It’s honestly makes her so damn anxious when that’s not the case, and Quinn drives like a damn maniac from time to time in New Dawn. She will cling to something for dear life, and absolutely will backseat drive. It leads to a lot of spats between her and Jane, Quinn, and Ivy. 

Dill: Do they have any rivals?

Blair: I would say that one of the biggest would be John Constantine. Blair is skeptical when it comes to the mystical and supernatural, needless to say, she absolutely does not believe in magic. However, when the Particle Accelerator went off, someone close to her was wearing a totem or a spiritual pendent that got mixed into her meta powers (it’s how she can cosmic project and do some of the things she can with energy manipulation...it also helps balance out her going supernova and such), so...some of her powers are part of the arcane. Johnny knew that the second he met her, so when she gave him grief and became skeptical when he was helping Ollie bring Sara’s soul back, he just smirked at her and went “hate to burst your little bubble, love--” and honestly, they’ve been at it from there.  

Emma: Ha! Emma is competitive and very proud, so yeah, she has rivals, some more fun than others though. For example, her rivalry with Nikolai (and sometimes Price) is who can drink the other under the table. Yuri...well, they ended up in a fist fight on a misunderstanding when they first met, so while he’s working with her and the 141, there’s definitely some rivalry there with them trying to one up the other. She’ll spar with Ghost to see who is better too. Honestly, she’s always up for a challenge, and its something she shares with a lot of her fellow Marines back home--including her cousin and her teammates. 

Quinn: John fucking Seed. Listen, they hate each other, full on loathing, because Quinn isn’t afraid to point out that he’s in a cult and we all know how John is when someone makes him feel insecure and inadequate...with Quinn he very much does, even if that isn’t his intention.  It also doesn’t help that John notices how Quinn looks at his wife from time to time, and he doesn’t appreciate it, but the biggest thing is that Quinn openly challenges him on everything. To Quinn, he wants to poke holes in his logic and show that John isn’t at all what he thinks he is. Quinn is a natural leader, he had been in the Navy, he knows what that looks like and he’s quick to call John out on shit. Wren gives him a bit of a run, too, their rivalry just happens to uh...turn into something else. 

Wren: Holly Pepper and Mary May Fairgrave. Those are the two that gives her the most trouble. In any other scenario (and in most AUs), Wren and Mary May get along just fine, but in canon? Wren straight up punches her in the face. There’s more to it, of course. Wren is being worn down by people wanting her to do this and that for the Resistance, her constantly being pulled in every direction and being forced to give to people without them giving in return. And Mary May wouldn’t shut up about the truck, while saying Wren was dragging her feet on what the Resistance needed done (mostly because Wren was sleeping around with John, but they didn’t know that yet), and Wren just gets overwhelmed with frustration and anger, and straight up punches her in the face and tells her “if you want the truck so damn bad, go get it yourself”, and storms out. Holly Pepper later becomes an issue because she knows John slept around with her, and Holly loves shoving it in Wren’s face. So...Holly ends up dying because she straight up attacks Wren, and Jane helps her with it because she knows that John has a soft spot for Wren. Plus there’s that little shit Quinn in New Dawn...they’re a lot of fun. 

Hollyhock: What's their biggest goal right now?

Blair: Currently, it’s to find her place and stride with the team and her powers. She just wants to not have to lay awake at night and worry she’ll lose control again and hurt her friends and loved ones. Her whole life has changed, and there are still things that are throwing her off. She needs to find her footing again and feel more confident in what she’s become. Helping people, including herself and teammates/friends, is what’s most important to her. 

Emma: As of right now, it’s to regroup and hunt down Makarov. She’s still healing from when Shepherd took out the 141 base and tried to kill her, Ashton, and Nora. The stitches are still healing a bit, but she’s pumped up and ready to take him down. Her goal, and focus, is doing whatever Price and Soap need her to do. It’s almost tunnel vision at this point. 

Quinn: Take down the Highwaymen and fix whatever bullshit Whitney and Wren have going on. He won’t at all pretend he knows what fucking type of politics they have in New Eden, or what rules they’re going by, but it’s very damn clear that Ethan is no good and needs taken down. Him and Grayson came because Carmina asked Rush, and they were never ones to back down from a challenge, not when it comes to helping those in need. So, he’s gonna take down Mickey and Lou, allow Grayson to avenge Rush while protecting Prosperity, and then stand with Wren and Whitney as they take over New Eden.

Wren: That depends on if we’re talking Far Cry 5 or New Dawn, but she’s mostly taking out the head Seed and establishing peace. She’s trying to do what’s right, and whether that’s for herself (which is the eventuality of her changing sides) in Far Cry 5, or for their people and her family in New Dawn (overthrowing Ethan and opening New Eden to more freedoms.) It’s all revolved around Eden’s Gate though, and she agrees to help Quinn and Grayson because she still cares about Kim and Nick, and much of the others, so it’s just a pitstop on her plan. 

Sweet pea: If you had to choose a favorite dessert for them, what would it be?

Blair: Crème Brule, strawberry shortcake, or chocolate lava cake. You could say all of the above, to be honest, she loves sweets. Blair is always snacking, and they’re usually little cakes, fruits, or something sweet. There’s a reason crepes are her favorite breakfast foods, fruit and sweet? Yes. Which I guess you could  add porfait on the breakfast menu too, in that case...anyway, snacking is usually something her and Mick has in common, though she’s not constantly looking for it the way he is. Mick finds food in missions and randomly...Blair is more disciplined than that. She will grab stuff for him a lot of the times if they’re in the same room or if she’s working near him. Leonard just stares between them, he’s not sure what he thinks of their comrade (he also lost his more recent memories, so he can shut it.)

Emma: Dark chocolate cake or tarts. Anything that has a bitter or sour tinge to it, because she’s not really a sweets person. Not when it comes to that, at least. She loves her mom’s sweet tea (and homemade lemonade). But she just would have something like raspberry butter cookies, cherry pie, or even an old fashioned ice cream (yes, with bourbon). She loves dark chocolate though. And tiramisu. 

Quinn: Oh, he loves the Russian desserts his mom would make, and honestly, Quinn has such a sweet tooth. Bird’s milk cake, Russian rugelach, waffle cakes, and especially kartoshka. He would help his mom (or babushka when they would visit Russia), and would eat them with Russian tea they would make. He also enjoys many flavors of gelato. 

Wren: Cheesecake. Without a doubt. She has always been, and will forever be, in love with cheesecake. And all kinds, if we’re being totally honest. She will eat any flavor, she feels strongly about it. You wanna piss her off easily? Eat her cheesecake. Wanna get on her good side again? Bring her cheesecake. John does. Whenever he’s in trouble, he throws a cheesecake on it. She’s constantly eating it to the point Whitney and Rowan have both reminded her that it’s not a meal. Does she listen? No. 

[irwinkitten]

do we get soft little princess content any time soon?? i'm missing dad!ash and his little princess

this has been sat in my inbox for like, weeks. i’m so sorry i’m this disaster who cant keep up with thingshowever for the first time in well over a year, i finally got that little princess update because i re-read it and i’m soft for my babies. warnings: sugary sweet fluffword count: 1.2kish. it’s a small one lmao 

masterlist for the little princess series

masterlist for all my writing

part twenty three

-

Landing back in LA felt like chaos personified, especially after the extended honeymoon the two of you had, but neither of you realised it was what you needed.

-

Lay next to Ashton, his body practically glowing in that post sex haze you were both in, you found yourself thanking whatever deity put him in your life.

“Baby?” Ashton’s eyes were watching you, his body shifting and you matched his movement, lay facing him. His arms pulled you closer, a kiss to your neck, leaving you with a soft smile as you hummed in appreciation.

“Just thinking.” 

“What about?” His eyes were curious now and you hesitated. But it felt right, at least, to talk. But not with your husband-god you still couldn’t believe that-looking so delicious lay next to you.

So you shifted your leg over his hip, pushing yourself to straddle him, a strangled moan escaping his lips as you rolled your hips against his, leaning down to press a kiss to his lips.

“In the morning. I think another round is in order.” 

The following morning had you both showered and in light clothes. You’d cooked breakfast and finally decided it was time to talk.

“You ready to hear what I was thinking about last night? Other than having you in every way possible?” The tease brought a blush to his cheeks with a smirk before he nodded.

“Honestly, part of my mind was stuck on the baby we lost. How difficult it had been for all of us. You especially.”

He frowned but didn’t interrupt as he held his arms open to you, and you took the silent invitation, settling in his lap as his arms wrapped around you tightly.

“What brought this on baby?” 

“I didn’t realise how sad we were till I saw your smile when I met you at the altar. The smile you had when our little girl realised that her daddy loved her just as much as she loves him and that you wanted her too. And last night, god it felt like when we were first dating all over again.” The giggle that escaped you as his lips found your neck, trying to pull your skin from his reach.

“All mine.” He muttered, making you laugh.

“Alright caveman. But everything we went through, I couldn’t see how sad you were, and I’m sorry. It was your baby too and my only reaction was like I was the only one suffering.” Ashton shook his head almost immediately.

“You had to feel every moment of that. I wasn’t expecting you to get over it, love. But we’ve got time on our side.” His voice was reassuring and soft and you couldn’t stop the smile from overtaking your lips.

“How about we spend longer out here? I’d feel bad asking your mum to keep our little girl for a month-” 

“It’s our honeymoon. We’ve got a village to help raise her and I think we needed to get away from everyone to really accept the recovery from losing the baby. I don’t think anyone is going to begrudge us this time together. I’ll talk to Luke and see if he can take our little miss for the last couple of weeks, that way it’s not all on my mum. And she’ll already be home when we get back.” 

“Sounds like a plan. Now Mister Irwin, there is a private pool with a view to die for and you’re wearing far too many clothes.” The coy smile you gave him as you made your way off his lap, had him smirking in return.

“I could say the same about you, Mrs Irwin.” You laughed as you shed your own clothes, stepping out to the secluded area as you heard Ashton’s footsteps join you.

-

The chaos that surrounded LA made you groan as the two of you collected your luggage, both of you having gained some colour to your skin in the Hawaiian heat.

“Is Luke meeting us home or here?” You questioned as Ashton checked his phone.

“Home. He doesn’t want to bring her out into the chaos we’re going to cause with the paps.” You snorted at that before you made your way to the pick up point. 

“Are we waiting for an Uber or-?”

“Taxi service for the Irwin’s.” Your head snapped around from Ashton to the source of the voice, grinning when you found Calum stood next to his car.

“Cal!” He laughed as he greeted you with a warm hug, giving the same treatment to Ashton before helping you both get your bags into the car.

“A little princess of yours wanted to hold a welcome home party. We kept the guest list to bare minimum because apparently she only wanted her favourite Uncles to be there as well as Shay. However, Shay is currently away for the weekend with Marc and so you get to deal with all of us.” You couldn’t resist giving Calum a deadpan look, waiting patiently before he laughed.

“It is just the three of us there and she did want to have a party for you both, but she then realised that it meant sharing you both and she’s missed you both too much to share at the moment.” Calum’s second explanation made your heart ache.

It’d been the longest you’d ever been away from her. Ashton had to stop you from facetiming her daily because he knew it would drive you insane. But it also gave him a chance to stop acting on his own urges to facetime daily to check in and see her. 

“I’ve loved this time away, but I genuinely don’t think I could leave her for that long again.” You shared a grin with Ashton once you were both in the car and Calum was pulling away from the airport.

“We fully don’t expect to see either of you at all this week because she will monopolise your time and we may or may not have been encouraging it. She’s really missed you guys.”

The rest of the car journey was filled with details of the flight, and the check in attendants amusement at how you didn’t even flinch at her saying that you both needed to pay the extra luggage fee. It was worth it in your eyes and it meant that your little girl got spoiled too.

When you got home, you’d managed to get the suitcases by the stairs before an excited scream came from the garden.

And then she was in your arms, the collision of her body into yours sending you stumbling back a little bit as she held onto you tightly.

“Nice to see that her old dad doesn’t even get the scream of delight.” Ashton teased, and it took her a second before she pulled away and wrapped herself around Ashton, not even caring at how he still picked her up despite the fact that she was getting bigger.

“Missed you too princess.” He murmured softly and your arms wrapped around both of them. 

Despite the honeymoon, she was what you’d missed the most.

It took the three of you a moment to finally pull away. You were unwilling to let go of her, but you finally moved and headed out to the back, grateful for Calum to give the three of you that moment in privacy. 

Ashton followed and your little girl hung onto him which made the other three laugh.

“Pay up. I know my niece well.” Luke crowed in amusement and you laughed as both Calum and Michael handed him some notes.

“C’mon little bird, you let me down!” Michael whined, but she merely stuck her tongue out as she rearranged herself when Ashton sat down, keeping herself firmly in his lap, but her hand had reached out for you.

You smiled as you took the spot next to Ashton, pressing a kiss to her temple.

“Your mommy’s missed you baby. I know you told us everything you did with your nana and uncle lu, but fancy telling your dad and I properly now? I want to hear everything you did on the zoo trip.” 

“But you went on a bigger holiday!” She protested, a pout on her lips.

“Yeah mom and dad. You went on a bigger holiday so you’ve gotta tell us all about it.” Michael teased, wiggling his eyebrows at you both.

You shot him a dirty look which earned a round of laughter from the boys and you sighed as your daughter stared at you in confusion.

“Your uncle Mikey is being silly, princess. So what do you want to know about our trip? Because your daddy and I did so much, and we’re definitely going to take you back so you get to experience some of the stuff we did!” 

This seemed to be the right thing to say as her stern glare that had been directed at Michael shifted to a look of pure excitement and joy.

“Really? Oh please, what did you do that we’re gonna do?” 

Ashton grinned as he launched into the first story of many, the sun sinking into the ground slowly as she listened with rapt attention, the look of awe never once leaving her face.

It felt good to be home again.