#also anon i didn’t know if you just wanted a general one sentence answer to this but

[hetalianfrog]

My apologies, lad (I’m unsure of your pronouns, apologies if you didn’t like me using that word), but I don’t think you understood what I was trying to convey earlier. Of course, I suppose there is a bit of a language barrier as well as you staying up late.

Anyway, there’s nothing wrong with “incurable” disorders. After all, I have some, but that doesn’t make me some miserable or hateful twat. Sure, it sucks, but being a jerk comes down to choices people make. It is human to love, but also to suffer together. I like the thought of them(Hetalia nations or whatever you’d like to call them) helping each other through their own suffering, especially considering the things they go through.

Also, I understand that hearing a different perspective may be hard as well as awkward to respond to. I understand that you’ve gone through some stuff yourself, and that you prefer to focus on the happier side of things when it comes to headcanons. Which is fine, I’m open to hearing others ideas and interpretations.

Personally, I’m a sucker for angst and somber things (since I do enjoy horror and thrillers after all), but I suppose that makes sense for me. It’s alright if you don’t like those things, to each their own. While I do prefer angst, I don’t really care for historical Hetalia all that much. I can see why you’d prefer the human AU since it would give you some more freedom in some aspects.

I guess this is to say I see nothing wrong with not wanting to do mental health headcanons, but the way you worded it came off in a weird way to me. I’m assuming that is partially due to the language barrier though.

I was first enticed by your blog since you mentioned being French and liking FrUK. I think I’ve seen some British people who like FrUK, but I hardly see any French people that seem to enjoy it. In other words, I was interested in your point of view on their dynamics, personalities, etcetera.

Im assuming you’re fine with us communicating this way. Unless you don’t want me flooding your inbox like this, in which case I understand.

/genuine /not-mad (these are tone tags, for indicating tone over text; I was using them earlier, but I was unsure if you use them. I have decided to not abbreviate them this time)

- Arthur Anon

Sorry, I think my sentences may be strange, I don't speak English perfectly haha... 🥲 (and sorry for not having answered, it was night in France so I was sleeping)

Before, around 2010, there were a lot of French FrUK fans, but today there are almost none 😔

I also like dark things (I had a big period where I was really into the anime Corpse Party, but I never played the game because my parents would never have accepted 💀) but I have a lot of difficulty integrating them into the canon... I'm generally quite sensitive (except for watching horror, it doesn't make sense) so afterwards I feel bad for the characters 💀💀💀 But my headcanons are pretty dark... Especially since the majority come from my conversations on Character Ai, which are themselves dark

Well, aside from depression or other darker stuff related to that, I already had a conversation on Character Ai, where I was France, and I was talking to England. I started the conversation with dark topics, and the AI ​​followed... Which ultimately meant that England turned out to have a serious psychological illness and killed me by beating me with a chair (I don't know whether to laugh or cry at the cause of France's death 💀)

And so it became one of my many headcanons (except I don't kill France at the end 😔)

and I don't really use a tone tag, because I generally put a lot of emojis in my sentences, or onomatopoeia... Or sometimes I just have no emotion, lol 👹

[xxx-wounded-angel-xxx]

Thank you so much for answering my "Poly!Lost Boys x Male!Reader with anger issues." Request, I appreciate it! I like the headcannons so I was wondering if you were okay in writing a fic about it? It doesn't have to be super long, or anything and I don't want to stress, or force you into writing something you're not wanting to do. I was just wondering if you were okay with it! I really like your posts btw.<3 🍃anon

Thanks! I wrote quite quickly your Hcs this morning in the hospital waiting room as my doctor was late, so I wasn't entierly satisfied with it. I hope you enjoy this longer fic I based on it! It was nice to take a break from the Eddie in Santa Carla fic I'm currently working and kinda stuck on. I hope you enjoy this 🍃anon

Looking through the thrift store, you were on a hunt for a leather jacket. Your old one was too used, and to be honest with yourself it was also gifted to you by someone in your family you did not likes and it was getting hard to stand this jacket because of it.  You saw a nice brown one, but after trying it, it happened to be too big. You looked at a dark one just to notice how it was ripped on a sleeve. Putting it down, you were getting ready to give up, and wanted to leave the choice of your future beloved jacket to your dear boyfriends. With the good sense of style they had, you were sure your boys would choose something really cool for you, and it would be a nice memory tied to the piece of clothing.

The boys were the greatest thing that happened to you in a while. You met them, one night on the boardwalk. You had already heard of them, of course, the four bikers terrorizing the boardwalk, always touching each other, exchanging sloppy kisses between milkshakes and cigs. You were admiring them. They were hot, and so confident in their sexuality… you wished you were like them. And one night, they noticed you. They came to you, and flirted, and somehow at the end of the night you had four very hot boyfriends. You were proud to call them yours, and were even more to be theirs.  “Yeah, you thought, I’m gonna let them chose my jacket.”

But as you were turning to leave the shop, a surf nazi bumped archly in your shoulder, and started to talk to you as if it was your fault. You saw red, and in a burst of anger your fist collided with his face. It was over, your self-control had left the picture. You saw yourself launching punch after punch at him, and dodging the surfer’s attack the best you could. But as one of his friends joined the fight, you saw from the corner of your eyes blond curly hair joining on your side. You could always count on Marko to have your back when it came to fight.  The fight turned into general fight, Lost Boys against Surf Nazis, until you were separated and kicked out of the boardwalk by security guards.

Now calmed down, you knew that you could say goodbye to the boardwalk, at least for the night. You silently followed your boyfriends where they were heading to, feeling bad to have completely ruined the night with your impulsive behavior.

As you sat on the sand close to your boyfriends, by the bonfire they had gotten by making its precedent owner scram, you saw your Paulie turn to you. “You okay Sugar? You’ve been quite silent. They didn’t hurt you too bad, did they?” Worried, Paul started to look you up and down, looking for an injury.

“No babe, I’m okay. It’s just… I’m sorry for ruining the night” you blurted. It was now Dwayne’s turn to be worried. “What do you mean, love? I don’t get it”

“If I didn’t start this stupid fight with this scumbag, you guys would not have to join in and we would not have been kicked out of the boardwalk for the night. If it wasn’t for me and my fucking anger issues, we would be having a fun shopping date…”

You did not get to finish your sentence as David interrupted you. “We’re not mad, you know? And we would certainly not love you less for what you did. So, what, you have anger issues? Have you seen Marko? The babe starting so many fights despite his height…” This time, it was Marko who cut David, by an outraged loud “HEY!”, hitting the platinium blond in the shoulder. “See?” David said with one of his usual smirks. “Marko has a short temper yet we still love him. Don’t worry about that kitten. But we sure would be less worried if you were like us…” “Not yet, David. But one day…”

Feeling better about yourself, you let yourself go in Paul’s embrace, and fully relax as he sloppily kissed you. Your boys knew about your anger issues, and yet they still loved you no matter what. Finally, it wasn’t that bad of an evening.

Read on AO3

[nuttyrabbit]

I genuinely liked all the obscure Sonic Facts that Greeny would post about! It sucks, but I found them really interesting!

However, the constant Ian Flynn bashing was really annoying. I understand not liking his writing style, it’s not perfect and can be criticized. But I swear to fuck, he would complain about the tiniest things!

Then he would talk about Flynn stans and how they sucked his dick constantly. I’m sorry to say this, but Greeny was hate-sucking Ian’s dick constantly!!!!

I don’t usually follow drama in the Sonic Fandom, since I’m too old to be getting angry over stupid things. I just stay in my lane, occasionally read fanfics for my ships, reblog theorizing/positive posts and cute fanart. Like, I think fandoms should be fun, so I try to have fun.

I followed Greeny since, as I said, I like the trivia they posted about and wanted to learn more.

At some point though, I think I became embarrassed to like IDW Sonic because of how much Greeny and their group would criticize Flynn and Evan. I took a break from the comics because the zombot arc had exhausted me, but I think reading the constant criticism made me not want to pick it back up. I still haven’t picked IDW Sonic back up.

I also feel like it’s gotten worse over the years. Like, I don’t remember seeing this type of stuff, or at least not as much complaining, back when I first started following Greeny.

Eventually, I stopped having fun and enjoy my time with Greeny’s posts. I felt like it made me more ashamed of what I enjoyed, and that’s not how I want to spend my time. It wasn’t even thoughtfully negative, it was just mean-spirited.

I recently stopped following Greeny, I think before Frontiers came out. He had made a post bashing the Flynn’s dialogue in one of the leaked cutscenes at the time (when Sonic first encounters the voice). Then he made another post translating the Japanese of that scene… and it was literally the exact same fucking sentence!!!!

I realized then that I was done with Greeny, that he was going to criticize the English dialogue for the entire fucking game. And I didn’t want to deal with it.

I wanted to try and enjoy Sonic Frontiers with being ashamed!

Sorry for the super long rant. Didn’t expect this ask to be a novel. I know you weren’t really talking about Greeny, but I’ve been holding this in and I just needed to air out my grievances.

You don’t have to answer or even post this ask, I just needed to get this off my chest. Again, sorry.

Honestly anon, I'm glad you posted this because my experience was very similar. For a long time I followed Greeny because they had good insights and made good posts, and even thought they acted cunty sometimes and had opinions that I thought were outright ignorant, I generally let it slide because things were relatively civil

But then yeah, the Zombot Arc brought out the worst in her and a lot of people, including me. God going back to my posts from that time is exhausting because I was furiously debating every one of these people and we were all being brick walls about it, and I could feel the discourse get naster and nastier.

It was around that time I remember her and the other people in her group just getting meaner in general and becoming very hateful towards Ian specifiaclly. Like they didn't like him a ton before but it became downright vitriolic and it felt like even discussing the guy in anything other than a negative light was a reason for them to jump down your throat

Even after the Zombot arc ended, shit remained so toxic that it was one of the reasons (well that and just my focus shifting from Tumblr in general) I just kinda left this site and didn't really look back, because it was getting to the point where I was dreading every issue coming out for the inevitable fucking discourse.

From the looks of it, it seemed like it only got worse with time, especially with the release of Frontiers.

Here's my ultimate fucking take. Greeny is entitled to her opinions, however crudely worded or wrong or bad faith they may be. But people are also entitled to call her out on her opinions and attitudes or just flat out ignore them, much as they are with anyone else's opinions, including mine.

The only reason I got involved in all of this shit was because I vented an opinion on Twitter and it got out of hand. Most of the time, I'm like you and just content to vibe in the fandom and talk about whatever, and I'd like to go back to that. I'd much rather be talking about my fucking OCs and my verse than dumb fandom drama bullshit

But like I said, I'm glad you sent this both to get it off your chest and to give me the chance to do the same. At this point I've just had so many bad experiences in this fandom (some of them of my own doing I will freely admit) that it's hard to care anymore. But I don't think anyone should be afriad to speak up about anyone in this fandom, even someone like Greeny or Crusher or a popular artist or whomstever the fuck

[ruki--mukami]

Let me just say that open interactions on your blog are such a great idea! It's so interesting to see how the same starter develops a completely different story depending on the character Ruki is interacting it and their previous dynamics.

As a reader, I just wish some of them could sometimes last longer as some stories are just dropped in the middle.

Anyway, I am having enormous fun!

🧩 Thank you so much, Anon!! I’m glad to hear that you, as a reader, have been enjoying the open interactions and have fun reading them. I’m well aware some people who follow my blog might follow for one or the other (asks vs. rp reblogs) but I’m elated if there are people who are content with even just reading the replies that I have written for each person and their OC. 

It’s definitely a fantastic way for me to both indulge myself in settings I’ve always wanted to see Ruki in while also furthering his relationships with other characters. And it’s also quite the fun challenge to write it in a way that would make sense for each dynamic to respond to. For instance, I wouldn’t want an academy scenario since I know not everyone goes to school. Especially with the scars this time around. I tried writing that sentence in particular so that it could potentially be a big deal, or it might just be any ordinary day if the OC has already seen him exposed before (i.e., love interests he has been interacting with since forever).  

It’s also more entertaining for me, as a writer, to keep each plot different, just because writing the same exact story each time gets dry for me very quickly. Furthermore, it’s fun for me to incorporate traits specific to each OC that Ruki can comment on (in hindsight, there were some missed opportunities that I regret but oh well—that’s what the second round of replies is for!) just like how I write my asks. I try to write each answer in a way that, if taken out of context, it wouldn’t make sense for any other scenario/character because that’s just how unique they are. From his lovers to the people he only interacted with a few times, I’m always excited to see how the plot will turn out. 

Sorry for rambling—all these factors that go into each response are just very fun for me to explore. I have a little criteria checklist in my head each time I write in general, so the open interactions add a new level of challenge for me. But seriously, Anon, I commend you if you truly take the time to read each thread in full—I honestly didn’t expect anyone to go that far, ahaha. I regret how the stories seem to drop in the middle as well (trust me—I probably only finish about 1% of my rp threads, the rest end in cliffhangers due to my own fault💀✋) but that’s because I try to reply to everyone in a timely manner while not leaving anyone out (to those I still haven’t replied to yet, I’m so sorry I swear I’m not ignoring you—it’s just a poor time management+sporadic motivation issue, if it’s something personal, you would know by now since I like to be transparent). 

For the people I do roleplay with, please don’t hesitate to let me know if there is a particular thread you’d like me to prioritize. My system right now is currently: reply to the open interactions + those who didn’t partake and have their own thread so that I can still interact with everyone. There have been times when I considered prioritizing writing speed > quality for the sake of finishing the stories, but as someone who enjoys taking my time and writing things poetically, I prefer to make sure everything sounds acceptable before hitting reply, rather than writing whatever idea comes to mind then sending it off without any revision. 

Anyway—TL;DR, I’m ecstatic to hear you’re having as much fun as I am with this, and for those who partake in not only my open interactions but just anything to do with my blog in general, thank you so much. It’s always a joy to rp with everyone and I look forward to helping everyone develop their characters as someone who runs a canon blog. Also I haven’t forgotten about the previous open interaction and hope to reply to those when I get home from my outing currently. 🧩

[pashminalamb]

omg Interrupted?? kaiser and sae?? im actually happy to see some kaiser cuz i feel like i never see a lot of him 😭 his character is intriguing ngll

but u know i went straight to saee. i can totally see him just pulling up the silent treatment when something doesn’t go his way 😭 his eyes so pretty tho i wouldn’t even mind the glares. i loved reading their reactions since neither of them have probably ever actually been degraded?? they in their own world doing whatever they want but reader didn’t take their shiit. i ate it all thank you for the meal

-💜

OMG??? YOUR NEW WORK??? i'm speechless, IT WAS SO GOOD 😭😭 i enjoyed reading it a lot (especially michael's part hehe)the reader being the dom one this time sparked something in me 😟– 🌷

Maam. MAAM??? MY DEAR MADAM. INTERRUPTED??? I am. In shambles. Absolutely. Demolished. Broken. Fhhhhhooooo that fic made me realize quite a few things abt myself. Like. “fun” stuff wise. 👀👀 A whole new door just opened for me in the realm of reading fanfics. 😮‍💨😮‍💨 You really outdid yourself with this one seriously. And I hadn’t read a Kaiser fic before this one but I’ve heard a lot abt him and read a lot of hcs and just know general stuff abt him and suffice to say you did a great job with his part. Seriously tho. That fic? 🤌❤️✨ Mwuh. It was amazing. I cant wait for the next part!! - ✨ anon

Thank yuu Lav, tulip and Starry ໒꒰ྀི ๑ ´ ˘ ` ू ꒱ྀིა I'm glad you liked my work. Honestly? the drive behind this idea was from don't bully me nagatoro and a bit of the scenes of boys over flowers as well as the days i got bullied as a child but we won't talk abt that

and the line "Men have to be dominated." i am not sorry and i will repeat it again. men need to be pegged

Reader did not take their shit (and i'm turning everyone into a dom here). But i'm really glad you guys enjoyed the fic, it was the first time i wrote for blue lock with a dominant fem! reader and since it was so well received i plan on writing more.

For Lav : *sigh* where do i even start with Sae. I know for a fact that when things don't go his way, he will try his best to force it. It's the only thing he knows... until you reverse the tables on him. If you're feisty, he'll treat you like a brat. and if you are serious about it catching him his wrists and pinning him down (weight doesn't matter here. he is gonna be surprised and fall back). Dirty talk to him and tease him. He will put up a fight but at the end of the day, he is nothing but a brat himself ꒰ᐢ⸝⸝•༝•⸝⸝ᐢ꒱⸒⸒ and you're the brat tamer

For Tulip : good. the boys need to be dominated ( •̀ - •́ ). and especially kaiser since he came new on my blog (poor king got dommed). I saw Art's (my bff) camera on my desk - and yk how that panned out as an idea. and there is more that's coming cause honestly... if i had to put my personality in one line : not submissive. I write subby themes, sure but i also write dominant content. and there is only so long that i can hold out for before giving into my... thots and writing this. more kaiser content is coming - with a new edition to 'your words, my hurt.' bring in the sadness and reconciliation

For Starry : I see thou hath awakened. (ง'̀-'́)ง and i will happily take responsibility for that spare no man

And i'm glad you liked Kaiser. It was my first time writing him and it was also the time he got dominated. And i have news- i'm writing 'your words, my hurt' for Bachira and Kaiser- but i'm really glad you enjoyed the fic and starry, i still have your first message in my inbox hanging. I'm gonna take time in responding while eating breakfast or something cause i wanna take my time, savor sentences and answer it as well - i promise i'm not ignoring you lovely ꒰ᐢ⸝⸝•༝•⸝⸝ᐢ꒱⸒⸒

As for interrupted, i'm deciding to sleep on it. Like let it be on my blog for now and not do anything abt it. Cause a lot of people liked it- instead i'll be focusing more on the half written wips i've got which includes a total of everything you can imagine and now that Christmas is near; i'm working on a new rin fic that i wanted to release for the holidays, fluffy things and then some.

Hope you guys like this one (esp rin's cause i've been thinking abt this for 2 months now and i can't get over the idea of it - tb to the time with me in bed with my tea and being sick - remember that phase?)

[jeanmoreaux]

atlas complex anon logging on for the last time

i finished it like two days ago and i have been trying to process it and i truly just….don’t know what to do with it 😵‍💫

the other death was SO PAINFUL ACTUALLY and i am choosing to believe it didn’t happen (bc objectively it didn’t! if you think about it!!! *eye twitch*) — bc why would you write such a lovely passage A LOVE CONFESSION IF YOU WILL and then fucking MURDER HIM…AND THEN YOU DONT EVEN TELL US PLAINLY WHAT HAPPENED (again, i choose to believe he lives on, mr security camera man)

tbh both of those deaths confessed their love and then she was like “that’s nice please drop dead xoxo”

(me trying to be vague about spoilers but also who fuckin cares nobody is reading this book)

anyway here’s the deal. i think it was all bad writing but i got so lost in the sauce in the last 15% that i could convince myself that i Appreciate the Ending?? like sorry i just am stuck on IN EVERY CULTURE THERE IS BREAD…but also what the hell even happened in this book and why was it even more convoluted than it needed to be

need olivie blake to pay for my therapy

so excited to hear from you!!! yeah, that second death. OOF. literally hated it. and right after that wendy cope esque love confession SOBBING FR. he has been my bestie from day one and he will remain so forever. i love him!! and it wasn’t that his death didn’t hit me, but it hit me because i Did Not Want Him To Die and not because the death was written well and executed well narratively speaking. ngl i read it and was like. this is so stupid. why like this?? after all the build up why at all but WHY LIKE THIS. also yeah the crumbs with the scenarios and security camera make for a range of possibilities of what *actually* happened but i have to say it felt a little cheap to me. like blake could not decide one way or the other and instead just kept all the options open which felt very unsatisfying to me. the entire thing is similar to what blake did with gideon’s last pov chapter (and both together exemplify my issue with the ending): keeping options open and lines blurry so that you can headcanon you own way out of the mess she made. which is not the great move she might think it is because instead of writing a scenes where she can actually evokes emotions because she commits to a thing completely and unequivocally it’s all so vague that the reader is never made to fully grapple with one outcome or the other. you’re left in limbo and that’s why you feel so disconnected from everything happening (at least that’s how it was for me). i love open endings but what she did wasn’t an open ending (given that it’s the last 30% of the book lmao) but a lack of narrative commitment.

i am so glad you appreciate the ending!! wish that were me!!!! i would so love to mske my peace with it but i Can’t. these characters deserve better. i read the last two chapters and just thought ‘that was it? wow. i feel absolutely nothing. what a shame.’ tho i agree the bread line being a banger. it is Very good. and that’s the thing there are some good parts and lovely sentences and sentiments (the love confession you mentioned might be one of my favourite passages of the entire series!!) but as a whole tac simply did not deliver in a way that makes the last chapter or the ending in general hit for me. idk it’s nicely written but the emotional impact is minimal because the narration did nothing to build up to it in a meaningful and nuanced way???? like i get it and i understand it and i like it out of context but it has no impact IN context because the story preceding it doesn’t warrant it. or maybe i am just too bitter to see it lol. veryyy real possibility.

also you are so right what even happened in this book??? sooooo convoluted. instead of paying for my therapy i want blake to rewrite the book istg like pls i am begging on my knees.

((also this answer is veryyyy vaguely worded too. but i am sure you Get It.))

[seungisms]

how often will skz and y/n have sex?

𝐁𝐀𝐍𝐆 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐍

chan always feels so guilty for being so needy around you all the time but he just can’t help the small twitch of his cock every time he looks at you ! you’re just so pretty and sweet to this guy and all he wants is to spend the rest of his life between your legs making you cum over and over again but his busy schedule doesn’t allow him to do so *sigh* unfortunately you guys will only have time to get intimate around once or twice a week and due to being so exhausted after practice, chan will mostly relay on lazy, slow fucking at midnight to take care of you. also relies a lot on his hand when he doesn’t wanna bother you cause :( he hates being so desperate and doesn’t want you to feel obligated after a stressful day :( feels bad once you start to notice your panties going missing day by day, having no clue most of them were stuffed under his pillow stained and painted in his cum. hates that he’s not around much to stretch your tight cunt out as much as he’d like but he always makes it up to you in the end.

𝐋𝐄𝐄 𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐇𝐎

despite being the ultimate boss bitch and constantly working his ass off, minho has no problem fucking you anywhere and everywhere and he’ll become the neediest most desperate asshole to exist if he even goes a day without getting to feel your warm pussy clench around his cock. you could literally just be visiting this guy at practice, trying to be the cute and loving girlfriend that you are by bringing them some food and he’ll be pulling you into the nearest empty room all the while ignoring chans’ scolds, fucking you up against the wall without mercy. constantly takes his stress and pent up frustration from work out on you so it’s safe to say that time isn’t a problem for him and he’ll be fucking you around four or five times a week at l e a s t ! absolutely obsessed with the sight of you crying on his cock and feels like there’s not enough hours in the day to fully enjoy the sight of your trembling figure beneath him, cheeks stained with tears and eyes dreamy and glazed, sucking cutely on his fingers as he fucks you nice and deep. quickies are also essential with this guy.

𝐒𝐄𝐎 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐁𝐈𝐍

he loves ! loves ! loves ! playing with your pretty pussy so much, to the point that chan will sometimes send him home during practice cause he’s repeatedly messing up the choreo, too distracted by the thought of finally having you wrapped snugly around his dick. unfortunately there’s not enough hours in his busy schedule to fully indulge in the sight of you completely fucked out and needy for him so he heavily relies on quick fucks whenever he can :( finds any excuse to have you over in the studio when he’s working late nights, feeling guilty as you struggle to keep your eyes open, looking oh so sweet drowning in his sweatshirt. but it’s not long before he has that very sweatshirt bundled up around your tummy, panties eagerly pushed to the side and cunt fluttering around his cock, small praises of ‘you’re taking such good care of me angel’ falling from his lips omg !!!! defiantly counts more on fast fucks before shows and getting you off in cramped closets at parties (he just loves making a mess out of you when he has the chance, no matter how risky it is) really depends on how much time he gets off from work so he only has the chance maybe around twice a week but he’ll always manage to sneak a little soft, slow fuck in there somewhere to make it up to you <333

𝐇𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐆 𝐇𝐘𝐔𝐍𝐉𝐈𝐍

could practically live with his face buried between your legs devouring your cunt until you’re trembling, sensitive and begging him to stop but unfortunately he has bills to pay and playing with your pretty pussy hours on end doesn’t cut it 🙄 gets easily frustrated and snippy with you and claims it’s cause he’s stressed at work but really he’s just sulky he hasn’t painted your cute cunt with his cum in what feels like days when really it’s been six hours calm down?? also has a lot of nights where he’s too tired from practice to do anything about the almost painful throbbing of his cock so cockwarming is a must in your relationship ! loves the closeness and intimacy it provides and lets out the prettiest gasp once he finally sinks into you, your cunt wrapping snugly around his veiny dick - the warmth and slight quiver of your pussy coaxing him to sleep in no time. if he wakes up earlier than usual you can bet your cute ass he’s gonna start his day off with some slow fucking; softly pushing his hips against your own, slowly stroking his cock deep against your slick walls and watching dreamily as your eyes flutter open, sleepy whines and incoherent begs falling from your pretty lips. chan always scolds him for being late to work but it’s worth it when he can fuck you like *god* intended him to. on busier weeks he’ll only have time maybe once or twice a week but during his breaks it’s honestly hard to get him off you, he’ll be begging for that pussy hourly.

𝐇𝐀𝐍 𝐉𝐈𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐆

no matter how much you guys fuck it’ll never be enough for this guy 😭 comes home from practice everyday all gross and sweaty and the first thing this mf will do is blackmail you into taking a shower with him, promising he’ll keep his hands to himself but before you know it your face is being pressed into the cold tiles of the shower wall and he’s hiking one of your legs up to fuck into you deeper, your small whines and the warm slick of your walls coating his dick with every thrust only making him press into you harder and slower, the slight curve of his tip stretching you out so well - leaving you sobbing on his cock and wondering how tf this maniac comes home from a full day of practice with enough energy to fuck you dumb?? number one enthusiast in public sex, while the other boys are getting styled and prepped right before their performance he’s too busy fucking you over the sofa of an empty dressing room, or propping you up against the wall of a cramped closet space and eating your pussy out until you’re left raw, sensitive and covered in his spit, already knowing his stylist is gonna give him shit for the scuffs on his knees from kneeling down so long. he’ll be ready to go again as soon as he’s left that mf stage <333 if he had his way he’d be fucking you every free hour he has but since the world doesn’t spin in han jisung’s favour he settles for five/six times a week !

𝐋𝐄𝐄 𝐅𝐄𝐋𝐈𝐗

bless his heart, he can’t handle quickies - he always somehow makes them romantic and slow af and ends up being late to practice so he’s banned them altogether :( very much a ‘🥺🥺 i love you so much, lemme hold your hand while i go down on you 🥺’ type headass, even though you specially asked him to fuck you stupid but okay ig <3 just loves taking his time with you. unfortunately the rare times he actually has free are late nights after the studio and he’s always so sleepy and ready for bed but he doesn’t mind suffering from exhaustion the next day as long as you and your cute pussy are taken care of ! whether it’s in the form of some lazy, gentle fucking or softly eating away at your slit until your cheeks are stained with tears and you’re pathetically grinding against his tongue - as long as you’re falling asleep with your needs taken care of then he’s happy. also l o v e s when you take care of him too, he hates begging and coming off as desperate but some days all he wants to do is come home from work and fuck you into the mattress, and the fact that you allow him to use your body like he owns it makes his heart so sore. so sweet and considerate and wishes that he wasn’t so busy all the time so he could actually take care of you like you deserve. makes love to you maybe once a week, if at all, when he’s extremely busy - but on his calmer weeks you can bet he’s putting that cock to some good use.

𝐊𝐈𝐌 𝐒𝐄𝐔𝐍𝐆𝐌𝐈𝐍

this guy practically l i v e s with his cock stuffed inside your tiny pussy whenever he’s not busy at practice ! always manages to make time for you and has no problem fucking you in the dorms when he’s too tired to make the trip back to your apartment. doesn’t care if he’ll be late for work most days - if you’re not cumming around his cock, fingers or on his eager tongue then he isn’t leaving for shit. literally just hits the older members with ‘at least i’m getting some pussy unlike some people’ when they scold him for being late 😭 another smug bitch in the fact he’ll have no problem fucking you with other people around; if you’re out for dinner with the other boys it won’t be long until his fingers are brushing under your skirt, filling you up with his slender digits and curling them deep against your slick walls just to watch you fall apart in front of everyone, claiming sickness knowing full well the glassiness of your pretty eyes and the flush on your face was due to him stretching you out knuckle deep. fucks you good and deep each and every time so you can’t even be mad at this mf. nothing stops him from getting his dick wet so he’ll probably be fucking you around six times a week at least.

𝐘𝐀𝐍𝐆 𝐉𝐄𝐎𝐍𝐆𝐈𝐍

he’s young and has a scarily large amount of energy so you bet he’s gonna be drilling that cunt on the regular <333 he doesn’t like upsetting his hyungs though so he’ll sometimes have to leave you in the middle of getting you off and will feel so bad for the rest of the day for leaving your cunt wet and empty of his cock, spends the whole of practice thinking about it :( cause everyone is so whipped for him he gets more days off than the others and istg he doesn’t let you leave his bed until he’s made an absolute mess of you, both his cum and your own staining your cute folds, lips red and bruised from his eager kisses and pussy sore from his endless abuse - he swears there’s no better sight. whenever he is at work though he loves sitting in a corner by himself, earphones in while on facetime with you, watching as you tease and fuck yourself with your own fingers - your quiet begs of release making him wish he could ditch practice and replace your digits with his throbbing dick, promising to himself that as soon as he leaves he’s gonna fuck you so good and deep that it’ll ruin your own fingers for you (he also loves how much of a good girl you are that even when he’s not physically with you, you still ask him to cum :’)) tires to make as much time for you as possible but as much as he likes fucking you dumb he also really likes video games :/ so probably around three/four times a week at most with this dork !

[letarasstuff]

Ranting

(A/N): This was requested by an anon, I hope you like it :)

Summary: In the middle of midterms, Spencer's daughter has enough and for the first time in her life, she rants to the team

Warnings: one swear word, school, school stress, mental breakdown, shitty friends, a bit of angst (but there is fluff to balance that out), weird grammatical sentences that are according to google correct

Wordcount: 2.3k

✨Masterlist✨ _____________________________ As a teenager, Spencer was pretty closed off. But this had several reasons, like being a child (or moreover a teen prodigy) at college and getting his first Ph.D, or that he hadn’t had a safety net of people he could have gone to. So as he became a father himself, he tried everything possible to assure his own daughter that her feelings and thoughts are always welcome and valid.

Unfortunately (Y/N) herself has developed the same habit starting high school and ever since Spencer can’t do anything to get her to open up to him. It’s not like they don’t have a good relationship, they have one of the strongest father-daughter bonds the BAU has ever witnessed. The girl simply has other ways to cope with her feelings and how to act them out in the safety of her own four walls. Her father learned to accept it, knowing that he can’t and won’t force her to talk to him.

So what follows now not only shocked Spencer. But also his work family.

It’s the time every teen in high school dreads: Midterms.

A word a teacher can mutter and a shiver goes through the rows of students in the classroom. Or at least it feels like it to (Y/N). She takes her school work very seriously. In her mind every single grade determines her future.

The rational part in her knows that the grades in her sophomore year doesn’t matter. That they are even long forgotten when she graduates. There is just so much pressure on her. But it isn’t coming from her father.

Spencer is pretty laid-back regarding school. He knows his daughter is trying her best and that it’s just the tenth grade and not the end of the world. School is not everything life has to offer, especially he has to know it as a scholar and profiler flying through the country in a jet back and forth.

It’s (Y/N)’s classmates, who pressure her to get good grades.

“We depend on you and your notes”, Tyler exclaims as he jogs next to her through the busy hallway. “Ty, I know. But I don’t have the time to get them done for all of you to understand by tomorrow. They are still a mess that only I know to see through. I still have to finish my history project and I go to my Dad’s work this afternoon, which means I won’t get much done and I still have to do the homework I got today before sorting my notes for the test in two days.”

At her locker, the boy still doesn’t let go of the subject. “Do you want to say that our grades don’t matter as much as yours? Because this would be a true selfish statement.” Maybe it is the lack of sleep, because she pulled three all-nighters in two weeks, or the fact that she is slowly getting fed up being treated like an unpaid private teacher, but (Y/N) can’t stop her sassy answer. “Tyler, you wouldn't even know how to tell apart your ass from your head if it weren’t for me and my help in biology. You wouldn’t even know how to spell selfish if I didn’t let you copy my answers in spelling tests in elementary school.”

Done with the day and her friend’s shit, she slams the door of her locker shut and leaves a flabbergasted boy behind. Half an hour later the teenager enters the bullpen with her visitor badge clipped to the pocket of her sweater.

On the way there she was fuming. The audacity of her friends. It’s not only Tyler, who tried to get her notes of a unit, she was the only one listening, even though the teacher said loud and clear that this will be important for midterms. A few other friends out of the group she usually hangs out with texted her the same question of when her notes will be given to them. Understandably, (Y/N) comes into the office in the worst mood anyone from the team ever saw, including her own father.

“Hey Sweetheart”, he tries to greet her with a hug. Even though both of them are not big on touch, they are extra affectionate with people they are close to.

To everybody’s surprise, the girl takes a step back, effectively avoiding his open arms. “Hey”, she grumbles out before taking a seat in the chair already waiting for her. Nobody is allowed to sit in this one, except for her. Not even Derek has ever put his butt on this one, knowing the sacredness of it.

Without sparing anyone another glance, (Y/N) gets the needed stuff for that history project out and continues working on it. The team resorts to throwing a questiongly look to Spencer, who shrugs his shoulders with a look of despair. So everyone resumes their work without even daring to say a word.

The general silence is occasionally broken by an unnerved sigh leaving the teenager’s lips. “Is the conference room occupied?” She asks, her voice clearly showing how annoyed she is. Her father shakes his head. “No, not that I know of. Do you need help with your school work?” This is obviously the wrong thing to say. “Do I look like a baby? I don’t need anyone to help with that, I have been going to school for ten years now, I think I can handle this project as perfectly fine as I did since day one. It’s just your keyboard typing that will be the reason for my first grey hairs if I don’t get out of here soon.”

Quickly (Y/N) gathers her stuff and storms off into the conference room. Immediately the team crowds her father’s desk. “What happened?” “Who hurt her?” “Go, talk to her!”

“Guys, I don’t know what’s going on. I’m at the same loss as all of you. The only thing I know is that (Y/N) is under pressure, because it’s midterms. But judging by the way she reacted, I don’t want to go near her. It’s safer to try to defuse a bomb than talk to her in that mood. Last time I saw something similar, her favorite show was declared finished, got a revival and then didn’t get one and nobody mentioned it again. She was so mad, I think it took three years of her life.” A silence of uncertainty spreads through the room.

“What about we give her some room until she calms down?” JJ suggests, being unsure herself how to deal with a teenage girl. But the rest agrees and goes back to filling out their paperwork.

This continues for about 20 minutes, till a loud bang and a frustrated scream is heard followed by “DON’T THEY WANT TO GET IT OR ARE THEY JUST STUPID?!” Alerted by that, seven people (yes, even Dave and Aaron leave their offices, while Penelope was already in the bullpen) storm into the round table room only to see a more than outraged (Y/N).

“Sweetheart”, Spencer speaks to her in the gentlest voice they ever heard from him and slowly moves towards his daughter, “What’s going on?”

Her response is delayed by several deep breaths she has to take in order to be able to talk without seething. “ALL OF MY SO CALLED FRIENDS ARE ASKING ME FOR MY NOTES, like do I look like a personal tutor? And when I tell them that I got a life, a life outside of school and grades, because otherwise I go completely bananas, just like all of you say, they get mad. Now they act like I’m the most selfish person in the whole world. I’m so done, can’t they understand that they are old enough to take care of their own stuff? I’m not responsible for them, their grades or anything regarding their lives. Otherwise I would be the mother of at least four toddlers and one baby and at the age of sixteen I’m not ready for that kind of responsibility. I know friends are there for eachother, and I really don’t mind helping them from time to time. But what they are doing is terror. Terror.

“Oh and don’t get me started on their tormention if I get something lower than an A-. Then they suddenly transform into geniuses, like they suddenly know everything possible. Of course, I’m the dumb one. I should have studied more.

“I am under an insane amount of pressure, because I know they rely on me, but enough is enough. I tell them that if anyone asks me for anything school related again and they act like I owe them an answer, I’ll cut off all ties to all of them. What am I, a roboter just there for their needs, without some of my own?”

After her long rant, (Y/N) takes a couple more breaths. It’s pretty much the only sound right now, because the team is stunned. None of them heard her talking, no ranting, like that. Not even her Spencer has seen her like that.

Realizing what she just said, the teenager fidgets nervously with her hands. “I’m, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to, you know, blow up like that. I, I really don’t know where this came from.” Nervously she scratches the back of her head. It really wasn’t her intention to let it out like that. Her plan was just to come home tonight and deal in the confinement of her own four walls with all of her feelings. It’s easier to be honest to yourself when you are alone than having an audience watching you losing it.

Suddenly (Y/N) finds herself engulfed in a massive bear hug. “Oh, my sweet sweet summerchild. You needed to rant to us and I’m so happy you did. Even though your uhm, friends, sound like big douchebags, we can help you sort something out”, Penelope tells her while keeping her arms around the teen.

“Just like lil mama said, we are here for you, Baby Reid. Don’t ever be afraid to tell us something, may it even be as small as you having stubbed your toe.” Morgan ruffles her hair and gives her a reassuring smile.

Just like them everybody shows her their support, be it encouraging words or affectionately gestures. Rossi invites her to a calm and quiet dinner at his mansion, cooking class included. Hotch assures her that she will get through this rough patch, with or without these fake people. JJ suggests (Y/N) comes over to her home and she can participate in a family game night at their home.

When it’s Emily’s turn, she makes sure to get her message loud and clear by looking the teen in the eyes (not as deep as it sounds, because some people make an intense stare really uncomfortable): “If those kids give you a hard time again, tell me. I’ll pay them a visit in classic protective godmother fashion, because nobody traits MY godchild like this. Just give me their names and I’ll handle the rest.” Obviously she doesn’t say this aloud in front of everyone, else Hotch will have her head, knowing she goes through with her threats. Instead she whispers it into the teen’s ear. Still, it makes (Y/N) smile, having such a strong support net.

Sensing the family’s need for time of their own to talk about the whole situation, the team leaves the room. Spencer gestures to her to take a seat after moving two chairs opposite each other. He wants her not to feel trapped.

“Do you still want to talk about it? It doesn’t have to be now, we can do it tonight, tomorrow, in a week or in a month. Just, please don’t shut me out. I know it’s difficult to be a teenager, especially in times like these. But it won’t do you any good keeping all of this for yourself. Today you took it out through anger. How will it look next time?

I don’t want to pressure you into talking. We don’t need to. We can find other coping mechanisms. We can try and reduce your stress. Anything. But we both know that this is not the right way.” While speaking, he takes his daughter’s hand, making her look up to him.

(Y/N) nods. Her eyes fill with tears. “I just can’t keep going like this.” She whispers, feeling all the stress, pressure and the intensity of the last few weeks crashing down on her. Quickly Spencer gathers her in his arms, letting her cry in his embrace.

After calming down, she looks up to her father with bloodshot eyes. “We can talk tonight. But I need you to do me a favor.” “Anything”, he assures her, stroking a hand along her back. “I, uhm, I need a new phone. I may or may not have thrown mine against the wall after getting a text from Tyler.”

Spencer looks at the crooked cell laying on the floor, the screen cracked. “I think we can get that sorted”, he tells her with a smile and gives her a kiss on the forehead.

The two of them leave the office earlier, having many things to talk about and many problems to solve. But with the help of her family (Y/N) gets through this, a time where people unfortunately only like her for her smarts and not being herself.

Taglist:

All works:

@dindjarinsspouse @big-galaxy-chaos @jswessie187 @kneelforloki

Criminal Minds:

@averyhotchner @mggsprettygirl @herecomesthewriterwitch @ash19871962 @ellyhotchner

[belphiesreverie]

Yandere god gojo X demi-god or fallen god reader? 👀 Since I know you like AUs

First jjk request and it’s an AU??? I’ve clearly been blessed, thank you anon 😌✨

I’m gonna go with the fallen god for this one, but I might do a demi god reader variation at some point 💕

He likely didn’t pay any attention to you whilst you were just an ordinary god. You didn’t particularly stand out, just went about your duties silently in the background. However, when you fell from grace, that’s when he became intrigued. He had always considered you average; not particularly hard working but also not too lazy, never starting trouble but occasionally getting swept up in someone else’s, not overly social with the other gods but also not a complete loner. So for you to become a fallen god truly caught him by surprise. What could you have done that angered the heavens so badly?

He had asked around with both his and your acquaintances and friends, hoping one of them could answer the question, but they all simply said you never told them and they had stopped associating with you. You and him weren’t particularly close hell, he’d only learned your name after you fell but he was confident that he could get you to tell him. After all, he seemed to be particularly favoured by the heavens, getting away with more than you could ever imagine. You’d probably feel so honoured that he even bothered to talk to you that you’d spill right away

Except you didn’t. And this only increased Gojo’s interest in you tenfold

Quickly enough, Gojo became a constant in your life. An annoying constant. Like a fly that just won’t seem to stop following you and buzzing around near your ear

He’d tried everything to get you to tell him what you’d done. And by everything, I mean he just pestered you in the hopes you’d find him so annoying that you’d give in one day and just tell him to get him off your back. But you never did

Gojo doesn’t know when he stopped caring about why you had been banished from the heavens and started to just genuinely enjoy pestering you and vying for your attention, but he was acutely aware that it had indeed happened. He noticed right around the moment you’d mentioned that he ‘hadn’t asked about the incident in a while and if he wasn’t interested in that then he could finally leave you alone’. Except he couldn’t. In that moment, all he could think about was how that was the longest sentence you’d ever spoken to him and that he wanted to hear your voice again

Quickly, his actions moved from general pestering to openly flirting and trying to get any reaction out of you at all. From all his time bugging you, he had only ever seen you scrunch your face up in annoyance or just sigh at him. And whilst he did find those reactions cute in their own way, he wanted to see more positive reactions. He wanted to see you smile at him, to laugh at something he said, to blush at him. And he was determined to get you to. After all, there was absolutely nothing he couldn’t do

Day after day, he’d appear in your home or by your side as you’re walking around to try and get any reaction apart from indifference or distaste from you. He’d bring you flowers or chocolates or buy you that cute pendant you were looking at for a little too long. He’d try and engage in conversations about topics he’d noticed you’re interested in, hoping to hear you say more than one word at a time to him. He’d try and play with your hair, hold your hand or give you a hug, ignoring when you swiftly attempted to avoid his affections. He’d throw pick up like after pick up line at you in the hopes of getting even the smallest reactions out of you

Gojo may not be the most patient man, but he’d keep trying. After all, he’d gotten some micro reactions out of you already. The smallest quirk of your brow, the slight widening of your eyes, he caught everything and latched onto those reactions. Because Gojo may not be patient, but he sure as hell was persistent

His patience, however, finally gave way when he had seen you with someone else. Someone that wasn’t him was making you smile, making you laugh, making you blush. Your attention was solely on them and you didn’t try to desperately avoid their physical affection. And seeing this, he snapped

Walking into your home later that evening, you were in incredibly high spirits. Not only was your date a complete success, but Gojo hadn’t bothered you all day. Maybe he’d finally given up and found someone else to bother. Or perhaps all the work he had to do couldn’t be ignored anymore. Whatever the reason was, you were just glad that he’d left you alone

Turning on the lights to enter your living room, you came face to face with the most horrifying sight you’d ever seen. There Gojo sat, covered head to toe in blood with your date’s head presented on the coffee table surrounded by flowers and chocolate. You wanted to scream, to run, to do anything but stand there. However, Gojo’s piercing eyes seemed to keep you rooted to the spot

He could see you were scared of him, you were absolutely terrified. This was simply just another new reaction that he got to experience from you and if he was being honest, he quite enjoyed it. He did feel a little bit bad about most likely traumatising you with this sight but it was a necessity to help you learn. Learn that you belonged to him and that he could get away with doing this to everyone you ever loved

Why? Because the heavens favoured him and nobody would care for what he did to toy with a fallen god like yourself

[wonlouvre]

hiii i love your writing so much! i wanted to request maybe a junhui + reader barista au >< the plot can be anything i'm just a sucker for fluff aaaa

hope you have a great day <33

you | w. jh.

pairing: barista!junhui x g.n. reader genre: fluff warnings: mentions of food (please tell me if i missed anything!) word count: 1.2k+

💌: i am currently working from home and finally managed to finish this! thank you so much for requesting anon! i hope you like it:’)

The coffee shop you frequent has a newly hired barista. You assumed that said barista is new because ever since you started taking comfort in their coffees and pastries while studying, this is the first time you’re seeing the tall and handsome man. He’s really handsome, you have to admit and emphasize that. Most especially up close, where you can fully grasp almost every detail of his sharp features; you can tell he’s out of this world. 

“Hi! I’m Junhui,” he happily greets before taking the cap off of the pen he’s holding, “What can I make for you today?”

Junhui. You remember his name and his voice. If you can fall in love with the sound of a voice, it would be his. 

You reciprocate his happiness by answering his question in great delight (pretending you don’t have two final papers due by the end of the week). You notice how Junhui’s smile grows as he gets your order down. Although he really won’t be making your drink as he takes charge of the cashier, you don’t mind. After punching in your payment, he hands you the coaster that would buzz once your order is ready. You thank him and leave a generous amount of tip. 

Not because you’re trying to impress him or give him any special treatment. You just think he deserves it. Actually, everyone in this coffee shop deserves it for how they have given you a place to study comfortably and at the same time a place to have fresh brewed coffees and baked goods. Junhui is now a new addition to the staff that you’re grateful for. 

The first meeting with Junhui was good and you thought you were off for a great start. You thought he would remember your name, your usual order or maybe even your face. But to your dismay, he doesn’t.

At all. 

It’s a little disheartening. Just a little bit. You’re pretty much torn on how you feel about him anyway. For one, you’re used to the regular baristas here greeting you every time you come in. It doesn’t matter what time or day it is. But, how come Junhui doesn’t even glance up at you unless you’re talking to him directly? 

On the other hand, you also don’t know why you have so many high expectations for him. Do you fancy him? Or are you just attracted because he’s handsome? 

Nonetheless, you ignore your disappointment and continue going to the coffee shop like how you always do. What you feel doesn’t matter anyway. What matters at the moment is you getting through the semester without any failing marks so that you can get the stress free vacation you’ve been yearning for.

You can always go to the library, but a warm cup of coffee and a decadent slice of chocolate cake is too good to turn away from. 

“Hi Junhui,” you shyly greet as you stand on the counter with your wallet at hand. 

The coffee shop is quiet right now as it is almost nine in the evening. You haven’t been going during your usual late afternoon study session due to circumstances so you haven’t seen Junhui on his regular shift. But tonight, it seems like he took the night shift. This is the first time you’re seeing him after a while. 

“Hey.” Junhui smiles, his pen ready. “I’ve been excited to see you all day.”

That last sentence makes you blink in confusion. Huh? You look behind you and the rest of your surroundings to check if he’s really talking to you. When it’s just really you that he’s talking to, you silently point a finger to your chest, confirming if it’s really really you that he’s talking to. 

Junhui only laughs. “Yes, you. Now, what can I get for you?”

You narrow your eyes at him. “What have you done to the Junhui of this place? Who are you?”

“Y/N, are you going to order or not?”

You gasp in horror (dramatically). “Did you just say my name?”

Junhui rolls his eyes. “You know what, no free cookies for you tonight.”

“No!” You hold a hand out in surrender. “Okay, okay. One cafe latte please.”

That night was both amusing and bewildering. You have no idea where the sudden turn around came over Junhui, but you will take it. 

From then on, Junhui’s smile is a little different and you can see it in his eyes. He still rarely calls your name but when he does, it’s genuine. He still asks for what you’ll be ordering, but it doesn’t bother you anymore. 

“I think scrolling through every Instagram story is not a good idea if you really want to get at least an eighty on that essay.”

In this particular study session, Junhui has kept an eagle eye on you. He’s not taking any excuses from you when he clearly ordered you to not touch your phone in exchange for a free slice of cheesecake. 

You pout when Junhui picks up your mug, pouring the refill he promised when you reached three hundred words. “Can’t I take a break now and have the cake?”

Junhui gives you a “in your wish” look while planting his other hand on his hip. “Nope. Your goal is to finish tonight so all that’s left to do is to review and revise.” 

“Since when did you become so strict,” you grumble and return your attention back to your laptop. 

“Ever since I started giving you free pastries, that’s when,” he replies and takes the chair opposite your side. 

You scowl. “I can always pay. You’re the one that’s declining.”

“I’m not complaining,” Junhui says and picks up one of your notes. 

Junhui admitted later that it was hard for him to approach you differently from how he usually addresses every customer in the coffee shop. Not because he doesn’t like you. Of course not. It was difficult because just like you, he found you cute and even cuter whenever he hears you call his name or whenever he sees your happy smile as you tell him your order (even though he already knows). 

Junhui’s guess is you make him speechless and that he gets stuck with his regular programming as a cashier slash barista catering to the caffeine needs of everyone. As much as he wants to be your Junhui, he can’t help but be blown away by you, your face, voice, presence.

You.

However, when you started to visit the cafe late and during his off, he knew he needed to change and develop your awkward encounters into something else, something intimate and affectionate in the sincerest way possible. That’s how he ended up finally and excitedly calling your name. 

That’s also the beginning of the best relationship you could ever ask for.  

“Shouldn’t you be going back to work?” You ask, confused as to why he’s lounging around. 

“Sweetheart, my shift ended thirty minutes ago.”

Your eyes widen, immediately looking at the time. It’s way past ten and you’re still here. Way past closing hours. Way past Junhui’s shift. You can’t believe you lost track of time. 

“I’m so sorry,” you apologize and quickly gather your belongings. “I didn’t notice the time.”

“Hey, hey,” Junhui calls and holds your hand to stop. “It’s okay. Calm down.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” You pout and zip close your backpack. 

Junhui just gives you his signature grin and waves a hand. “I told you it’s fine.”

“Is that your excuse to keep me to yourself and stare at me all night?”

Junhui giggles. “You got me.”

[holden-caulfield]

Hi! Hope everything is great with you! ❤️ are you taking requests now? I have an idea for a Draco x reader fic. If you want to write. It’s ok if you’re not feeling it or if you’re not taking request ☺️

I was thinking about plot with something like that the reader and Draco are always on each other and fighting, but secretly like each other. They fight to make the other to notice them or to interact. One day the reader borrows a book at the library and made some notes in it (even if she’s not supposed to, just a bad habit that she has). She just writes some thoughts or comments regarding the book or life in general. And then Draco borrows the same book after the reader and sees that there are notes in the book but don’t know who made it. He likes the notes and decided to write his own notes in the book. The reader borrows the book again and see the notes that Draco wrote. So maybe they go back and forth writing notes in the book or even change to another book. Then I don’t know about the plot only that they end up together and it is a fluff ending ❤️

Oh. God. This request was e v e r y t h i n g, i loved it so much, thank you lovely anon!🤧

Wouldn't You Like To Know

↪︎ 𝐦𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

Summary: draco and reader hate each other but a common interest might change everything.

Warning: none :)

Word Count: 1207

//

Nothing could make you angrier than that slytherin prick, Draco Malfoy, and yet you couldn't bring yourself to loathe him. There was something just so intriguing, so intoxicating about the boy that made you forget about how much of a haughty twat he actually was.

He seemed to be always picking on you, always having to comment on your choice of clothing of the day or stating how 'immensely insufferable' you were. You obviously never backed down, taking every chance you got to talk with the slytherin, even if it was just to insult his incredibly unnatural, yet entrancing hair or his arrogant ways.

You hated the boy, but you couldn't ignore him. Even though you very much wanted to on certain occasions.

It was saturday, a moment to finally be able to relax a bit and forget about lessons for a while, but someone decided to importune you. It was way too early to engage in a full battle, so you saved your efforts, leaving him in the hallway with his clique and a snarky reply. He had a rather surprised look on his face at the lack of interaction, but you couldn't notice it.

You made your way to the library; it seemed to be the only place you could find solace in. Reading had always been a way to unwind for you, therefore it was no surprise that the library was exactly where you were headed.

You skimmed through the long shelves of books, stopping your finger on a very old-looking volume. You took it out carefully and found yourself a cozy spot in the library, near a window so that you could see the lovely morning unfolding.

It was a copy of your favourite book of all time and you could swear the vintage-like look of the tome was due only to your continuous readings. You loved that book, every time you read it feeling like the first time and successfully taking your mind off of whatever you were worried about.

You started reading it for the hundredth time, taking your time while doing so, and without even realizing it you were starting to underline certain sentences. The quill and ink in front of you on the desk seemed to be begging you to use them and that you did. You highlighted all of those phrases that struck something you, you wrote tiny notes near the words you found the most interesting and you realized that when it was too late. The damage had been done, so why stopping?

You kept reading for a long time, the sky visible through the windows changing vastly beside you until it was already past lunch-time. You closed the book lovingly and put it back where you found it, sure to be able to return later, and took off towards the great hall.

Unbeknownst to you, that was also someone else's favourite book because when you came back, more notes had been added. Tiny messages in the most elegant calligraphy you had ever seen were adorning the pages you had previously stained. What really surprised you was that most of those short lines were actually replies or simple comments to your own.

'This is my favourite line.'

'I'd argue that the best line is actually at the next page.'

'This passage, i will never get tired of reading it.'

'How could one get tired when it's the best piece of literature ever written?'

You were completely shocked but somehow your heart warmed at the gesture: a stranger liked your same exact book and took the time to reply to the silly comments of some heedless student, it sounded almost romantic.

You immediately took a quill with the intention to add more comments but froze as you dipped it in the ink. What were you going to write?

You stopped to think for a moment and the most obvious question came to mind, so you retrieved the quill from the inkwell and wrote onto the last page, the only blank one.

'Who are you?'

You let the ink dry and placed the book back in its place, planning to come back the next day and find an answer.

It was silly really, to be so excited just because a couple words exchanged with a stranger. It had no meaning either: said stranger might have had the same habit as you, writing in all the books they read, or maybe said stranger only found your comments funny and wanted to add their own.

Nevertheless you returned to the library the next morning, very early given the fact you hadn't really slept the previous night, excitement flowing freely in your veins and keeping you awake. You hurried to the chosen section and grasped the book, clutching it in your hands as you brought it with you towards your usual spot.

You opened the book and quickly browsed through the pages until the last one. A reply was there, but not the one you were expecting.

'Wouldn't you like to know...'

What now? You couldn't just keep writing there, you couldn't just change book and keep on writing on every single volume in the library...

Defeated, you stood up, book opened in your hands as you walked through the library you knew by heart, trying to decipher who your mysterious correspondent could be.

"You?!" your eyes shot up from the book to meet his grey ones, Draco Malfoy.

"What? Can't even visit the library now?" you replied, eyebrows raised. You noticed he was oddly eyeing your book and slowly closed it.

"Why do you have that book?" he asked again, almost ignoring you with his eyes still set on the tome.

"I was reading it? That's what i usually do with books, you know."

"Are you sure? Because i have a feeling you write in them." your displeased frown soon turned into one of stupor.

"You?!" he nodded, smirking; for the first time you noticed a tinge of genuineness in his smug grin and the thought that maybe, just maybe Draco Malfoy wasn't the bully everyone thought passed through your mind.

You didn't know what to say and apparently neither did he for you both remained still and silent, staring in each other's eyes. It wasn't awkward: you looked into his grey orbs with longing, as if you had always known he could have been what you wanted and finally were able to see this side of him, the side of him you were in love with even if you didn't know it existed.

He cleared his throat then, making you focus back on reality.

"Although i enjoy the library, i think we should find a different place to talk about... this." he motioned to the book and your dreams completely shattered. He was probably not pleased with the discovery, one of the students he hated most exchanging notes with him. "Maybe at hogsmeade, tomorrow, at 8?"

"You don't hate me?" as relief washed over you, surprise did too.

"Not really, i actually quite like you, but i thought you hated me so i played along." you smiled at the unexpected confession and he furrowed his brows. "So, is that a yes? Because i can go back to hating you if not and forget everything."

You chuckled lightly, rolling your eyes. "Wouldn't you like to know, Malfoy..."

//

Taglist <3

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[atinymonster]

drunk baby monster

ateez 9th member.

when jiyu turns twenty and chaos ensues during her first time trying alcohol.

inspired by a lovely anon’s ask hehe ✨✨ and this all happened on jiyu’s birthday this year (march 15th)!! i had midterms around the time so i totally lost track of jiyu’s birthday 🤧🤧

⚠️: mentions of alcohol

➴ taglist: @banhmi07, @jiyeons-closet, @jaeminpeachy, @mochibabycakes, @euphoriamingi, @marsophilia, @studioreader, @goddessofdestructionbeast, @dkdlwhs12

➴ masterlist

Jiyu warily eyed the soju bottle in front of her before her eyes flicked to the men sitting around her on the couch.

“I know I asked this at least ten times already within the last half an hour, but are you sure this is a good idea?”

Wooyoung whined, shimmying closer to her before giving her his best puppy eyes. “You have us in case something goes wrong!”

“What do you mean if something goes wrong?!” she asked, not feeling at all reassured for this first experience.

She trusted them, she really did, but did she trust herself or her unknown alcohol tolerance level? No, she really didn’t.

“If you don’t want to try, don’t feel pressured, Ji,” Seonghwa reassured, patting her head.

“No!” she denied, slightly startling herself with how loud she was, “It’s not that I don’t want to try it, as embarrassing as it sounds, I’ve always wanted to try drinking soju the day I’m of legal age,” she sheepishly explained what used to be a childish wish of her’s.

“But I’m just embarrassed about what could happen when and if I get drunk...”

There were endless possibilities of what drunk her could potentially do—she could accidentally fire off embarrassing Universe private messages to ATINY, or just drunkenly interact with ATINY in general, or she could babble about the most random things in the world while crying or laughing, and the list goes on.

And she just knew Wooyoung, San, and Yeosang were ready with their phones to record the momentous occasion and not let her live it down for the next few years.

“I’m pretty sure we’ve all done some embarrassing things when we were drunk at least once in our lives,” Hongjoong reassured with a chuckle. Despite turning twenty, Jiyu was still such a little baby to them.

“It can’t be like Yeosang hyung where he started texting the group chat about how much he loves us before texting out the ponytail song,” Jongho reminded, snickering at the horrified and betrayed look said man gave him.

“I thought we all mutually agreed to forget that ever happened!” he hissed.

“That actually did make me feel better though,” Jiyu admitted, ignoring Yeosang’s pleas about wiping that memory from her head.

Sighing, she reached towards the bottle before slowly filling the shot glass. “All right, if I do anything embarrassing, please do me a huge favor and just forget it happened. Otherwise it’s moving out of the country for me.”

San snorted at how dramatic she was. Surely she wouldn’t do anything too embarrassing; it was Jiyu they were talking about—the one member that sometimes acted like the oldest despite being the youngest, and the one that often times held the few braincells they all shared.

But he had never been so wrong.

They found out she had a decent tolerance level, but that was where she went wrong. At some point along the way, she overestimated herself and had gotten just a tad bit too tipsy.

“Okay, we’re taking these away,” Hongjoong stepped in when she started giggling and hiccuping in the middle of her sentences. Taking the two soju bottles and shot glass, he and the other six were shocked when she started to whine.

They’ve never heard that sound come out of her mouth in all of the time they’ve known her. It was like a child whining when their mother took away their favorite toy.

“Someone please tell me they got that on recording,” Wooyoung stifled his laughter as he watched their maknae be reduced to a giggly mess at the hands of too much alcohol.

“I got it!” San proudly chirped, having been recording since her fourth shot. “She’s so going to kill us for this, though...”

“Did I ever...mention that...Seonghwa gives the best hugs?” she slurred, falling onto said man and hugging onto him.

Seonghwa had no idea how to handle a drunk Jiyu—he just returned her embrace while the others hooted, laughed, or just awed at how different she had become.

“So she’s a cute drunk,” Yunho concluded, chuckling when she started playing with and petting his hair. “You never see her like this on a daily basis.”

“It’s endearing, yet freaking hilarious,” Yeosang snorted, swatting her hand away when she started to reach for her phone. He had been in charge of keeping her away from the device since she didn’t want to accidentally drunk call or text anyone, especially ATINY.

Suddenly, Hongjoong gasped before shooting up from his spot on the couch. “We still have schedules and practice for Kingdom tomorrow! Why did we let her drink tonight of all nights?!” he whisper–shouted.

And that’s where they all knew they had royally screwed up. Schedules for the next day had completely left their minds when celebrating their maknae’s birthday.

“It’s okay! Maybe if she drinks enough water, she’ll just...flush it out of her system,” Yunho offered before standing up and running into the kitchen to fetch a glass of water.

Meanwhile, Jiyu started to develop little hiccups, something the boys found extremely adorable despite their earlier panicking. The red flush across her cheeks also added to the cuteness.

“And have I ever told you guys,” she started, slightly tripping over her words due to her hazy mind, “I love you this much!” Dragging out the word ‘this’ she proceeded to draw out a huge circle with her arms before falling back onto the couch in a fit of giggles.

“I shouldn’t be thinking this otherwise Jiyu will actually slap me into next week, but we should get her to drink on our days off a little more,” Wooyoung snorted as he tried to help her sit upright before steadying her.

“I got water!” Yunho announced, coming back out and carefully handing her the glass. “Alright, please hold with both hands so you don’t spill, baby monster.”

The two older ones couldn’t help but grow soft at how adorable she was, holding the glass cup with both hands like a little kid before bringing it up to her lips and drinking up the water.

“It’s hard to believe she turned twenty,” Seonghwa commented, adoring eyes watching the way she placed the cup back onto the table before looking around for someone to hug.

“Yunyun!” she called out to the group’s giant teddy bear, holding her arms out and looking up at him expectantly. Yunho had no complaints—he enjoyed hugs from her, as well as giving her hugs.

“We need to get her to bed soon. Hopefully she can sleep off the hangover, too,” Jongho noted, seeing as it was way past the time they should be sleeping during promotion weeks. They had to wake up again in a few hours, and yet here they were, one tipsy while the others were watching over her.

“One of us should sleep in the spare bed in her room tonight in case she needs something,” San suggested. Yunho volunteered considering how tight she was holding onto him.

“Yay! Sleepover with Yun!” she cheered before letting out a small hiccup. Yunho giggled and patted the girl’s head.

“Alright, take these water bottles with you and let’s tuck this baby into bed,” Hongjoong handed Yunho three water bottles, and they all brought her to her room to coax her to sleep.

“Please don’t have a hangover tomorrow, baby monster,” Wooyoung teased, poking her forehead before bringing the comforter up to her chin. “Otherwise you’ll really be a baby monster tomorrow...”

Snuggling into the cool comforter, Jiyu pulled it up farther so it covered her mouth. “Who’s...baby monster?” she wobbly asked.

“You are,” Yeosang answered, discreetly plugging the charger into her phone and leaving it on the nightstand. “A twenty-year-old baby monster.”

Leaving her phone on the nightstand would prove to be the worst mistake Yeosang could’ve made that night when Wooyoung’s horrified shriek woke everyone up a few hours later.

“Guys we’re so screwed! She called Sunwoo, she’s actually going to kill us for not stopping her!”

[nabrizoya]

honestly would LOVE to hear your thoughts on the nikolai duology because i really only see blanket praise or blanket hate for it whereas I see a lot of wasted potential. Bardugo's actual writing was beautiful as ever for the most part, but the choice of the plot/beats feels baffling to me. I love Nina, but her parts felt so separate from the rest of the book until the very end, and even that felt off. I liked the first 2/3 of KoS enough, dealing with the monster, political tensions, 1/2

and even the cult of the starless saint was at least interesting because dealing with people trying to rewrite the narrative of their greatest enemy (who hurt these young leaders in deeply PERSONAL ways) was really compelling (making him literally come back was. a choice) but I feel like somewhere in the last third, KoS went in a wholly differeent direction, and RoW has this vibe of feeling like she definitely wrote it after reading the show scripts or even seeing some footage. idk. 2/2

I will try to be brief (1/12)

Hey anon! Thank you so much for asking this even though it took 38756588247834 years to answer this I’m so sorry !! The Nikolai duology was good—wonderful too maybe because of the myriad of themes and topics it discussed and explored, all in addition to how beloved these characters are. For me, it’s the end of KoS as it is for you, and the entirety of RoW in particular that irk me the most.

I have very little issue with KoS, and I agree with everything you’ve said. The political tensions, the sort of urgency in trying to secure a country at the cost of personal reservations, preparing for a war that seems unforgivably near the door, etc. was all thrilling. After all, it is the first installment in the duology, and it’s supposed to set the course for the upcoming books.

KoS managed to introduce the stakes and the circumstances, lay the rails for what the characters will face and what it might mean to a vast set of entities connected to the events. And it’s hardly out of sense to expect Rule of Wolves to pick up where the previous book left off and carry forward the themes and plot points introduced in the first book.

Except, RoW failed spectacularly in that aspect.

Rule of Wolves: the second book, and the supposed finale to the Grishaverse and the Nikolai duology; it fails to continue the other number of threads that KoS set up for it, effectively compromising the characters, their characterizations, the themes and other political tensions and stakes. The due importance that should be given to the heavy set of topics that get brought up in the povs are not through, nor are the small details that Leigh added to the conversations evolve into something worth talking about, which are the actual points that could have been given some more page time to explore than just making them facts or points of nostalgia for the characters.

If you take a step back and analyze the whole timeline, events, characterization, objectives of the arcs and the plot points etc. etc., all the way from Crooked Kingdom to Rule of Wolves, there’s so much that is left out and tied in, quite haphazardly, which leads me to believe that Leigh wanted to attempt writing a duology that is more plot-driven than it is character driven. And we know that Leigh writes character driven stories brilliantly, and SoC, CK and TLoT are testament to the same. Heck, even TGT has more consistency than whatever TND has.

So, objectively? Plot possibilities? Characterization? Potential? Personal goals? Addressing the very serious themes it brought up, in little or major light, but give no proper elaboration about them?

The lost potential readily compromised the characterizations of many characters, and it all amounted to their arcs being very underwhelming.

I’m dividing this into four parts and here’s the basic outline.

Writing and Plotting

The Plot, Possibilities and Potential.

Characters, Characterization, Character Potential.

Remedy (what I think would've worked better to tie this all up)

This can get very looong, so be forewarned.

I. Writing & Plotting

Now, Leigh Bardugo’s writing is exceptional, no doubt. The sentences are short and flowy, and convey the tone, psyche, environment and the setting and its effects on the pov character marvellously. It's also immersive. It’s the same in Rule of Wolves, except, a little or a lot weaker.

The two main parts of this is that one, that Leigh slightly overdid showing a lot more than telling, and two, that the RoW (and perhaps KoS too), was more plot driven than character driven, the latter of which is actually Leigh’s strength.

In Rule of Wolves, Leigh’s writing seemed very choppy and snappish. The descriptions were lacking, or maybe that’s just me wishing for more internal conflict and dilemma, and going back and forth in one's own head for a bit. It felt like she showed more than she told.

Example being how Zoya ‘snaps’, ‘drawls’, ‘scoffs’, or ‘scowls’ less, and even if that’s supposed to be show Zoya beginning to be a little less unpleasant than she usually is, the tone in those chapters was not strong enough to distinguish how and why the character was acting a certain way. Nor pinpoint an explanation on what brought that change about. (And there were many instances like this with many other characters), which resulted in the characters themselves feeling so off to me.

Leigh’s characters are important to the story. They carry tremendous weight and actively contribute to the plot. Except, by focusing a lot more on the plot, some parts of these characters’ relevance was not up to the mark. It is greatly due to how weak the plotting and pacing of the book was, tbh, more than just her writing.

Consider: Mayu Kir Kaat. She is integral to the story, but she is thrust into responsibilities, and that doesn’t give us much time to see her as a person, and then as a person with a duty, like we see with most other characters. Whatever parts of her we did see were very circumstantial and timed, which is probably the reason why not many we’re unable to appreciate Mayu as much as we should. (Maybe fandom racism also plays a part, so, well,,,).

Like, we know from Six of Crows and with The Language of Thorns, how great care went into describing the characters’ state of mind, which further heavily influenced their choices and decisions. This time though, I think she wanted it to be more plot driven, hence the whole crowded feeling of the book and general worry about oh my god too much is happening, how will all this be solved and all that.

And this, I think, greatly hampered Leigh's writing, leading to unsettling and rather unsatisfying character arcs. Not to mention that there was quite little space given for the characters to develop or let them grow in a satisfying way which touches on most of the elements and themes that get brought up with regard to their powers and potential,,, and when it was indeed brought up, it was all in vain since they were never followed through.

That's one of the biggest problems for me in RoW: Plot points brought up in KoS were not brought forward in RoW.

II. The Plot, Possibilities and Potential.

Phew. Truly buckle up because this train has too many coaches. And to discuss them all, let’s keep the starting point as Crooked Kingdom.

a) Parem

Now, by the end of Crooked Kingdom, we know some important things about the parem.

It's dangerous asf for the Grisha who have to sacrifice their will and capabilities for a short time superpower high that they didn’t even ask for

Which means they are more often than not forced to consume the drug

Shu Han is the creator of the Parem and are also creating a new kind of soldiers called Khergud (who additionally require Ruthenium, but we’ll talk abt that later)

Fjerda snatched the formula after kidnapping Bo Yul-Bayur, keeping him away in the Ice Court and in their possession, and used the Parem to further their own heedlessly heinous agenda

I think it’s easy to understand how KoS started off on the right track, considering that Kuwei Yul Bo is mentioned, the antidote and jurda is brought up and so come the political tensions alongside it (what with the impending war, the demon, the lack of funds in the coffers and security and peace for the country alongside safety for the Grisha).

The point is, parem is a character of its own. CK was its inception, and its fate was decreed along with its lifespan and its doom. Ideally, by the end of RoW, parem should have been vanquished while addressing its nature as a deadly drug, the addiction and aftermath, and the key person who will guide the plot: Kuwei Yul Bo.

Parem is a political tool that pitted countries against each other, making one another their allies or enemies. (Though parem is not the only one factor). Ravka doesn’t yet know about Kerch’s neutrality. The Shu made their move to assassinate in the end, just as Fjerda cleared the air about their goals.

Point is, parem is weapon, a new kind of warfare that keeps getting alluded to in KoS. The first book gave a glimpse of how the Shu and Fjerda are using parem, thereby exploiting, prejudicing etc. the Grisha in their countries. Khergud whose humanity is washed away with parem + ruthenium, and the Fjerdan Grisha (are targeted) drugged and exploited while be subjected to torture, training and imminent death, parametres of these outcomes being severely gendered.

Ravka too wanted to weaponize it and create a usable strain that would still give the Grisha their powers but at a minimal cost, until Nikolai’s conversation with Grigori convinces him out of it and to use only the antidote for the Grisha.

And when are the contents of this conversation brought up again?

Never.

Another aspect of parem (that the conversation also covers) is this: that what was once merzost, parem is its strange cousin. Parem parallels breaking the bounds of Grisha norms unnaturally, while merzost takes it a step further to break the bounds of nature itself, which comes with a heavy price. They're both the same with little differences. Amplifiers are in tune with this discussion, hence the conversation between Zoya and Nikolai about how, and whether or not the abomination in him, the parem, and the amplifiers are tied together. This gets brought up again in the conversation with Grigori.

Parem parallels the superpowers, something that Zoya too manages to achieve once the corruption of the amplifier business is resolved, which makes her realize how in tune with nature the Grisha must be, and how limited the Grisha powers until then had been. And why the amplifiers were a corrupted piece of magic.

Zoya was supposed to be the conduit in that sense that she reversed the Grisha norms and understood the importance and nature of small science. This is alongisde parem getting abolished or resolved in the least, be given a redressal.

Yet instead in RoW, we barely see any of Zoya’s powers, nor even her experimentation and hunger for power which would give her protection. We don't see how she begins to realize that while power was indeed protection, it was also a responsibility. Not clearly, anyway.

So like, not only is this entire discussion thrown away in Rule of Wolves, but no matters are resolved either. Parem did not reach its end like it was supposed to. Merzost with regard to parem would have been an excellent thing to address, with or without the Darkling being present, because the blight is there. But that doesn’t happen.

What happens instead? We get one chapter of Grisha getting the antidote during the face off at the start of the book, the women in Fjerda are not brought up again and instead we jump to Shu Han. Kuwei is also conveniently forgotten because hey, the Zemeni are here so it’s all sorted!

RoW could have (should have actually) sought to address both the political and medical (?) aftermath and implications. Maybe it did succeed in showing the political side of it, with regard to Mayu, Ehri, Makhi and Tamar’s storylines. But that’s only in Shu Han, whose state of affairs we had NO idea of until RoW. No idea, so much that it was completely out of the blue.

And what we did know (get to know about in KoS) is Fjerda and the affairs there remained… unsolved.

(...sorry).

b) Grisha Powers

Re: From the conversation between Nikolai and Grigori, and Juris and Zoya, about how parem and the amplifiers are parallel to each other in terms of being abominations, a corruption of Grisha powers. Now the theory of it is not entirely explained, but we do know that the parem and whatever Zoya learnt from Juris was meant to move along in the same direction.

But we don't see another mention of it, except maybe we could dig a little deeper and realize that it all adds up because Zoya is the Grisha Queen of Ravka, Summoner, Soldier, Saint, all of it rushed and unnecessarily magical in a war so dire and realistic in RoW.

Welp.

c) Spy business

Just… genuinely what even was Nina up to in RoW? A spy, sure, but only to garner information on the pretender?

Why couldn’t there have been two responsibilities for her to uncover: the lies or truths about the pretender while the Apparat causes hindrances, and Nina trying to seek out more documents of the locations and labs where the Grisha women are being tormented and the other Grisha being weaponized? It could have been a leverage to discredit Fjerda in front of everybody in the Os Kervo scene. Imagine if Nina whipped out the documents of Grisha labs and brought the truth of the exploitation and killing and kidnapping etc. in front of the convention of all nations. All of it together would have upped the political tensions by quite the notch.

Even then, there’s a possibility that it wouldn’t matter either because the Grisha aren’t exactly valuable to all the nations. But killing and exploiting is still wrong so maybe it might have worked? Or see, even if it wouldn’t have, the slow and sluggish realization of Mila’s identity by Brum, and alongside writing it as a tragedy where Nina’s efforts seem to have gone to waste, or where Nina is telling Zoya about not accounting for Prince Rasmus’ word and she informs her about the documents she has snatched? Something could have been done here?

The point is, KoS focused on Fjerda and its unraveling, and it wasn’t continued with and through in Rule of Wolves. Instead it sought to find the problem in a whole new country, Shu Han, and fixed it within the same book leaving the other country as it is.

d) Ruthenium and the Blight

Ruthenium, the metal that is an alloy of regular metal and Grisha made steel, could have been utilized more significantly in the books.

I mention it in association with the blight because while on one hand it is true that the blight is an area full of nothingness, ruthenium as a metal could have been utilized to show the effects of rushed industrialization that is leading to the ground losing its essence. This is supposed to be advanced warfare after all. Besides, Makhi loses someone very dear to her. Perhaps ruthenium is more dangerous in Shu Han because the Shu use it to create the khergud, so the constant manufacturing of it has been leading to the metal leeching the lands of their fertility, along with the blight.

And so also to broker peace, Ravka could have provided aid in some ways. :

1) The Darkling sacrificed himself, as a result of which the blight vanishes. While the blight took away her niece, the possibility of a blight persisting despite the ending of RoW could be attributed to ruthenium.

2) Ravka could provide the reversing effect to the alloy of ruthenium and metal using Grisha and otkazt’sya engineering and ingenuity to replenish the lands.

All in addition to whatever will be Shu Han’s policies to bring lushness to their lands.

e) Women and War:

Holy fucking Shit, where do I start with this?

Whatever we saw in Fjerda was haunting, and we see it from Nina’s chapters. There’s literally no resolution for it, nor is it ever brought up again, at all. In Zoya’s chapters, we see through her eyes the brunt that Grisha faced with the war, and in a country that has refused to recognize Grisha as the citizens and considers them expendable.

Add to it her own narrative of how the women are never mentioned, let alone the ones that she has lost or has known to suffer, at the hands of the war, at the Darkling's torture and powers. The description of these women suffering, often being forgotten and thrown aside as mere casualties… where or when was it ever going to be brought up again?

Like, switching between such horrifying things happening in Fjerda to whatever was happening with Zoya and Nikolai and Isaak is such a contrast, horrifyingly demeaning and insulting, even more so when it failed to align with the importance of parem and offer a solution to both these problems.

Now switch to Rule of Wolves, where the Tavgahard women immolate themselves on Queen Makhi’s orders. Not only is that such a cheap and insensitive thing to do, it gets treated a simple fucking plot point in the book, and it barely gets addressed afterwards. Women in Asia have a vastly complex and complicated history with fire, and this is a serious criticism that culturally affects readers in personal ways. And what gets done about it? Fine, Zoya feels baaaad, sorry oops why would the women do that?!?!?

Where is the adequate sensitivity to the topic? Where is the continuation of the pain Zoya feels for many people, despite them being the enemy? How does she honour them? Where is all that dilemma and pain? Why does she not think of them or just get a line or two to talk about them?

Where is the due importance for this suffering given? Structurally and culturally?

f) Soldier, Summoner, Saint / Yaromir the Great

We never really get any explanation for why Zoya deserves to be the Queen, and why she is the best. But we do get to see why Nikolai isn’t the one supposed to be on the throne, and it’s not just because of his parentage but also because of his failings and doubts and the need for acceptance with the secrets he carried.

Here's the thing though; it’s not just about her showing mercy. It’s very subtle, and in good sense, should actually have been given a little bit more importance that be loosely brought up at random times.

Keeping aside the fact that Zoya is representative of Ravka—a woman, a Grisha, a Suli girl who changed the course of war and who knew what it was like living in poverty, being as an underprivileged person of the society in addition to the trauma from then and the state of living at her aunt’s place—which is meant to be covertly apparent, the other reason tracks back to Yaromir the First, who with the help of Sankt Feliks of the Apple Boughs—the one who raised the thornwood—lead Ravka at that time into the age of peace.

The Darkling testified that in his POVs, that while Feliks and Yaromir worked in tandem for Ravka, Aleksander worked for safeguarding the Grisha. In one sense, Zoya is supposed to reflect that moment in history in the present moment, except she is Queen and Sankta, and Grisha, all three at once.

It is brought up in one of the Darkling’s POVs and once in the conversation with Yuri in KoS. Other than that, we never actually get any more hints of this explanation in the text, which is the reason why the entire ending felt so so rushed, and like a fever dream, that even if it was a plot twist, it was kinda very baseless when it should have been more ohhhhh sort of a thing.

g) The Starless Cult and Saint Worship

This cult had immense potential to blossom into many things, some of which were indeed touched upon in KoS when Zoya says that she saw a bit of herself in Yuri, and brings up time and again how easily she’d been led and had not been aware enough of what’s right and wrong, just as she supposes Yuri is too. And to some extent, there is truth there, because in the Lives of Saints, we do see why Yrui comes about to hail the Darkling and how it parallels Zoya’s, of being helpless and ten being saved by a different power/ their own power, respectively.

That’s where it forks, that Zoya is older and realizes the path that Yuri has chosen and understands that it won't happen until he realizes it himself because the Darkling’s crimes are so obvious.

Even then, there’s still more potential: This cult could have been the mirror that would make Zoya reflect on the questionable methods of the Darkling, and the ways in which she might be mirroring them, despite or not it is the necessity because of the war. How she is training soldiers too, just as the Darkling did, and while the need to take children away from their homes just as soon as they were discovered Grisha was abolished, it was war, and they needed soldiers.

So like, there’s quite a big narrative going on here, how mere children are pushed into one path of becoming a soldier and the whole system that was that the Darkling followed to train the Grisha and all of that. All of this in addition to the juxtaposition to the Grisha being seen as elite despite them being hunted, and the people who are not Grisha frowning upon them. This is also the work of the Darkling, which actually paves the way to see how there can be a world where the Grisha are not feared or seen as abnormal, despite or not they are given a Saint-like narrative.

This cult could also have been the segue to discussing Yuri and his brainwashing, and the sort of cult-ish behaviour of believing in something firm when you couldn’t believe in yourself, or not seeing the magnitude of the crimes of their supposed Saint, alongside always staying focused on becoming a soldier only and never actually thinking beyond what is told.

Some of these are very subtle and some are brought up, but never given too much of an explanation.

Genya brings up another good point in the funeral chapter, about how Fjerda seemingly taking into the whole Saints thing could mean that if the Darkling moved there, he could very well sprawl his influence there to bring in supporters. Which leads to another discussion that gets brought up towards the end of the book: about Nina telling about the Ravkan Saints to Hanne and therefore to the Fjerdans,,, which doesn’t exactly sit right with me. It’s still a very nascent topic, and I think SoC3 will explore this path of faith and personal beliefs etc. but leaving it just there, while talking so much about Saints in both the countries,,, don’t exactly know how to put it into thoughts here.

But regardless, the cult of the Starless had different potential to talk of (blind) worshipping of an ideal without critically examining why the person must be put on the pedestal in the first place (and if it is simply power, then there is actually a narrative right there, which RoW gets right, about the people valuing the power still, as a result of which the monarchy still persists at the end of RoW. Even then, there’s more discussion awaiting there).

Not sure if any of this makes sense, but I’ll leave it at this here for now.

edit: 05/07/2021 | I think what I was trying to say here is that we do not have any kind of narrative evidence to seeing how and why it seems right that the Fjerdans will worship Ravkan Saints; is it merely because they are all Grisha? Or is it because of the segue explore this path of faith and personal beliefs and all of that, of the talk of the monastery and the Grisha there being of all identities, that a monastery is in Shu Han, that it has Djel's sacred Ash tree so far away from Fjerda... much to think about.

III. Characters, Characterization, Character Potential.

Mostly going to be about Nina and Zoya, but I’ll bunch up the rest of them at the end.

a) Nina

*head in hands*

I severely mourned how poorly Zoya was written in RoW, but then I realized that more than Zoya, it’s Nina whose potential was severely undermined and wasted. On one hand, I’m glad she uses her powers and quick thinking,observation and her own tactics to analyze the population and opt for the best way to make them see the truth she wants to show them (eg: making Leoni and Adrik and Zoya saints and also showing that the Grisha are the children of Djel via people’s belief to Joran and Rasmus’s mother).

But then, it’s like you said; her parts were so offbeat and outpaced and completely disjointed, when in fact, Nina is the thread that ties all the characters, their plotlines and potential, together. Nina is connected to Zoya and Hanne, two equally important characters and main characters of the duology. Whatever scope Nina has, they are greatly in parallel to Zoya and Hanne. And it’s all literally there, in the text! What a waste.

Though keeping aside these parallels, Nina’s own journey from Ketterdam to Ravka to Fjerda, while is spoken about, doesn’t touch some other parts that I see potential in. Or this is just meta.

Nina has grief not just from Matthias’ death but also from the loss of her powers as Heartrender. So much of the Second Army was built on being a soldier, and perhaps the Darkling was not outright disdainful of racial differences in his army, yet he still stripped every part of the children away until they weren’t children anymore in his view. They’re all soldiers… (albeit his soldiers, preparing them to do his bidding because hey, give and take right?). Nina was a soldier, and she is a soldier still under Zoya’s role as a General, but an ‘other’ of a soldier. That’s her only identity, and the loss of her powers means that she’s a different kind of soldier.

I imagine that this entire time, some small part of Nina longed for normalcy, or whatever settled as normal for a life like hers. In the sense that she wants to go back, but what is back and where exactly did she want to go back to? What was the before and after and where did things go wrong or change? There’s tragedy in the realization that whatever you were before what you became is not a place you can return to, and that’s a different kind of loss that she has to bear, and all by herself. She has powers over the dead now, a strange power she learns to grow to, but all the places she has been, all the lives she has led and people she had been, everything might seem like they’ve all been locked away in some strange place leaving her barren and indisposable.

She’s off to Fjerda as someone she isn’t, figuratively and literally. In KoS, Nina brings up many times how odd she feels as Mila and in some capacity longs to be Nina Zenik again. This ties in with the previous point of returning to somewhere, but where?, but is also a segue towards body dysmorphia, the thing that Nina and Hanne’s storylines parallel and connect too with in a small way. It’s a great line to follow to discuss what her discomfort with her body means to herself while it means something entirely different to Hanne, who is also not entirely comfortable being who they are. (This discomfort further which leads to gender dysphoria, while for Nina, it will be about learning to accept her powers. I’ll add on to this in a bit,).

I'm mourning the lost potential of that experience being a parallel to Hanne’s own feelings, of a discussion between people being uncomfortable with their bodies, something that can mean multitudes to each person and on their own accord.

In parallel to Zoya, I like to draw it from the fact about Nina wanting to go back to who she was, while Zoya actively tries to lock her past away and drown it somewhere or throw it to the storm, never to hear of it again. She has no identity other than being a soldier, and that’s enough for Zoya, because who she was before she was a soldier is not pleasant. But moving from being just another expendable shell of soldier under the Darkling’s rule, Zoya becomes the one third of the Triumvirate, and then the King’s general, all of which bring self-awareness of Zoya’s capabilities and challenges that are bound to excite her. But all of these also compel Zoya to be many other people to others as she slowly grows to realize that power is not just protection but also a responsibility, and it will inadvertently mean confronting her past of her lost identity, realizing the how of the Darkling, and how harmful it was. As Genya puts it perfectly in Rule of Wolves, that they were all taken away when they were young kids, not even barely children, and then thrust into responsibilities that didn’t allow them to be anything else other than what the Darkling told them to be.

Back to Nina; a few other great parts about Nina’s arc could have been about her connection to languages, as language being a mode of strengthening identity, in addition to growing to her powers. In RoW, there’s this line that goes ‘how sweet it was to speak her language [Ravkan] again’, and the feeling of homesickness. Like, Nina is trying to connect to Ravka through what she knows best—language, and then stories. In that, Nina realizes a part of her identity, which could also act as a segue to Zoya reclaiming her own heritage and ethnicity. Not only that but Zoya and Nina’s stories are literally so intertwined that it’s hard not to see how their choices and line of thought affect one another’s arcs, in the grief they have and how they choose to treat it, and also show why Zoya is particularly protective of Nina (and keeps wishing that she doesn’t become the monster Zoya had become, in the sense that Nina is more mature in handling her grief than Zoya was and the entire mercy plotline ties Nina, Zoya and even Genya together. More meta, haH).

And that’s why the ending doesn’t make sense. Even though the part about her not being comfortable as Mila is not brought up many times in the continuing chapters (and that’s why perhaps naming Nina’s discomfort as body dysmorphia may be wrong), there’s still the part of Nina readily accepting to be who she was a Mila and remain in Fjerda that seems iffy to me. Especially when Nina and Hanne literally a few chapters ago think about running away (it may be just another alternative they might be fantasizing about, but I think it still means that they both want to be their true selves without hiding any parts of it away). So her staying as Mila… well, it doesn’t exactly add up.

I’d also add the part of Nina’s story mirroring Leoni’s, and how she is from Novyi Zem and being a part of the Second Army meant that she had little to no connection with her past, her culture etc. But maybe that’s just wishful thinking on my part that Leigh went for that arc.

edit: 05/07/2021 | I don't agree with my point anymore about Nina not having the kind of ending I assumed she might have, considering that it is very well possible for Nina to treat her identity as Mila as a fresh start, as a Grisha with a command over the the dead and begin a new normal that is suited for her. You can read more here.

b) Zoya

For one, white passing Zoya is not canon to me. I simply pretend I do not see it.

See, her race was handled very badly. Making her half-Suli was supposed to show the struggles and the trauma that the ridiculing of her identity by other people has caused to her. Except, not enough time nor text is given to thoroughly discuss it. Not to forget how problematic of a narrative in itself it is to make Zoya white passing.

It would have made more sense to make her dark skinned and predominantly Suli-looking than whatever yt bs she was put through. Her not being white-passing would have led to conversations about tokenization, or people caring little about her and not giving her any respect because she is Suli. Or being called beautiful to the face and praised just for it or a harmless tumble in their point of view.

So like, instead of making the ‘mistake’ of seeking for acceptance, seeking appreciation and love, from her mother at first and then the Darkling, Zoya instead makes herself someone to be feared, if respect was not what she deserved. The iciness is a part of her and has always been, but all of it soon became a shield, an armour that she vowed to harden her heart with. Just the sheer impact of this narrative and her reluctance, and seeing Nikolai love her for beyond who she thinks she is… if all of this was canon, I’m pretty sure I’d have built a shrine for this duology.

Let’s now talk about her grief, and...

…

Okay it’s not for me to point fingers at how Leigh chose to write about grief because there’s no one way or one proper approach to go through that pain, and if that’s how she chose to write about grief for Zoya, fine! But I really wish we’d have gotten a little more into her head to see how the trauma has affected her thoughts and how she struggles against why and what exactly it is that Juris wants her to do. That enough time and text was dedicated to Zoya’s feelings and the mayhem it caused her, as a result of which the dragon’s eye took its cue and made things more unbearable to her because she was the only one to bear them all.

Like, I feel like Zoya was overwhelmed throughout the book and in between she had some skyhigh responsibilities to discharge and it’s all so inconsistent and poorly woven,,, it completely dissolved her character from KoS and made it 10000000x more miserable for me to read her POVs. And honestly, what even were her assignments that the Kirkus review mentioned? Never an inch of text in RoW is given to decipher her complications of her mind, the muddled sense of hopelessness and fear that grips her time and again. Why overwhelm her so much that you fail to do her mental state and capacity any justice?

I’m not going to be harsh about how much David’s death bothered me-- no actually fuck that; what’s the point? Fine, he died. All because you wanted to make his death a plot device to make Zoya reconcile with loss and deal with it? Where was Genya’s grief? Literally no point of having a death in the book at all, and it didn’t even achieve anything. (I’m still trying to wrap my head around why David’s death was important and maybe if I find some straws, I’ll consider…)

There were so many other ways around it; could have brought back Lada and killed her off, or have the Darkling piss her off so badly or just. Something. Instead of whatever happened with David. I think this is too harsh and insensitive of me to say about Leigh, but still… there’s a myriad of other ways to have gone about it. Helping Zoya deal with her grief with Nikolai at her side, to understand that the rage that was fueled from her loneliness, like it had been in the past, could now be a weight that Nikolai was willing to carry with her… Helping someone with their grief, staying and choosing is also a love language you know?

So in that regard, I won’t regret saying how flat the garden scene was to me. Zoya’s lines, though tinged with grief, were so out of what I would expect KoS Zoya to say. Maybe it’s also because of how bitter I was reading about David's death, despite that part being spoiled for me.

The cost shouldn’t have been David’s death, especially not when his death too wasn’t properly handled at all, and Genya’s grief was never spared a second thought beyond bringing Titanium.

+

Now let’s talk about how Out of Character Zoya was throughout the book. Her punchy attitude was missing, and even if she was warming up to her friends, we see little of the iciness she continues to retain. Another part of this is about exploring her relationships, particularly with Nikolai and her growing feelings for him. I wish we’d have seen them grapple with more of their confusion and propriety, if only for the yearning™. Besides, no matter how cute their scenes were, they were mostly (like maybe some. 70%) awful to read them, simply because it felt so odd to see Zoya be so open with Nikolai, all of a sudden.

A part of this definitely has to be the fact that we don’t know just how much time has passed between the end of KoS and the start of RoW, and we never, never see any description of they regarded their feelings for each other and how they understood it themselves. I don’t actually know how exactly I can put this into words in a manner that will make sense, but the only scenes where I appreciated Zoyalai were in the Ketterdam chapters, ONLY. The rest was… bleh lmao. Their scenes were so cute and brilliant, and if only we’d seen more of the internal conflict and had given some more time for them to practically approach their feelings but still end up in the puddle of it. If only.

Their scenes apart were the good ones, because that’s where we finally see Nikolai feeling the loss, no matter how temporary (on the verge of being permanent since it’s the war), of not having Zoya with him, of not being there with Zoya because who else would it be if it wasn’t her? Zoyalai had good scenes but they barely lived up to the mark lol. Their feelings are never thoroughly explored, nor their mental capacities.

While we’re talking about Zoyalai, let’s also talk about how lame it was for Zoya to say that Nikolai was the golden spirited hero all along, from the very start, when canonically we know Zoya had little to do with him in the earlier books, that she may have only been physically attracted to him and never saw him as more than just some guy with a responsibility to manage, and had sooooooo much distrust about him. And that it was only in the next few years of working with him and alongside did she grow to recognize his efforts and relish in the hope that he was building for Ravka, inadvertently making Zoya hopeful too.

Nope. Instead, we’ll just throw in some destiny bs that he was the one all along rather than show that the beauty of their relationship did not stem what they perceived of each other, but was instead built on strong respect and admiration for one another and their capabilities. 100% destroyed their relationship for me.

+

Some good parts about Zoya’s arc in RoW was how she acknowledged her past mistakes, and the nuance that was touched upon in seeing sense in becoming a soldier from the start, that offered her a chance to be anything other than a bride. That some part of her was grateful for the Darkling for teaching her how to fight, while still keeping Genya’s words in mind about how they were mere kids, children who had only one path to traverse because the Darkling (who wanted their acceptance and loyalty) nor the Kings of the country let the Grisha be anything else other than pawns of the war. That she recognizes her mistakes as a teen and how self centred she was, that her being snotty had at times cost some peoples’ lives too. And she doesn’t take the blame all up on herself, because it’s not hers alone to bear. Super good.

Also, the way Zoya comes to view power as responsibility instead of merely as protection was something cool to read about. It’s not clear in the books, but Zoya actively tried to not be the Darkling while still continuing to build an army for the war out of necessity, and actually sharing some parts of the dream that the Darkling had for the Grisha. I can’t articulate this so perfectly, but the point is, Zoya trying to avoid becoming a tyrant like the Darkling was an active process that she was constantly trying to change, and where Zoya could not recognize her own feelings and inherent thoughts about warfare that in some ways did mirror the Darkling’s, by the end of book, Zoya is much more self-aware and conscious of herself and her power than she was at the start of the book. And this was well done.

+

Now, what is up with YA and making people turn into giants or animals lol wtf. Why couldn’t we have seen Zoya use her dragon powers in a way that symbolizes the conditions of her dragon amplifier and the power of the knowledge she obtained from Juris? She is a Saint, and we’ve seen that their powers allowed them to cause ‘miracles’ and such, as we see at the start of KoS and at the end.

Why couldn’t we have seen Zoya dabble with her newfound powers and completely lose her shit in anger during the wae, only to rein back in mercy, just as someone from Fjerda begs for forgiveness since they see her then as a Saint? Adrik and Leoni used their powers in Fjerda, so having Zoya bring about a conundrum of all orders and do something about it would also have been cool, wouldn’t it? In the funeral scene we see her turn water into ice, thereby making a path for Genya. Why couldn’t we have had more exploration of the importance of the dragon’s eye and the general nausea of being overly empathetic every. damn. time? Why didn’t we get to see her powers? Why couldn’t we have seen her fail in them and realize that the reason she was not perfect was because she was trying to be strong on her own and was not relying on others and joint effort?

Her turning into a dragon was genuinely the most baffling part bc here’s a war that’s so serious and dire with metals and bombs, and then here’s this magic that will solve all of it entirely. Like I’m not saying it was bad, (I am actually saying just that) but I also don’t know what I am saying, except that the ending felt like a fever dream.

…?

Not sure if I’ve managed to convey it properly, but well. Zoya felt out of character throughout RoW, and that the only place I saw KoS Zoya was in the final Os Kervo scene where Zoya finally agrees to be the queen.

c) Nikolai

Nikolai’s arc was very satisfying and brilliant to read about in RoW. In KoS, he seemed very much like a passive character, one of the reasons why his stunt with the Shu in RoW was appreciable, no matter how ill-timed of a plot turn it was. His journey throughout this book was also introspective to see why others deemed him unfit as the King, and even if they were his enemies who thought that in want to dispose him from the throne, Nikolai realizes that him being on the throne is not of much value and that this book was entirely about him seeing his privilege and making decisions to counter and correct the mistakes he’s made. That was nice. Oh, also his father not being an antagonist was a pleasant surprise.

I don’t have many complaints about him, except perhaps wanting some more internal conflict and elaboration about his feelings for Zoya. Them being apart was where it was satisfying, and then in the Ketterdam chapters. His arc could have been better in KoS, but that’s to blame the plot for the characterization.

d) Hanne

Now, from the very start, their arc was super good and it only got better and better until… the ending. Except it’s so odd that Hanne, a poc, has to now live as white person, while feeling comfortable in their transmasc identity. Icky, no? That you need to eliminate one part of your identity in order to feel safe and comfortable about another? Add to this the whole white-passing Zoya thing,,, doesn't exactly send off the right message.

Together with Nina, the ending seems uncharacteristic for both of them. Them coming to accept their powers and knowing to use their powers on their own accord was brilliant, though the entire husband business felt very,,, eh to me, even if it did make sense. The ending about their name and their new identity was too vague.

e) Genya, Leoni and Adrik, Kuwei, Mayu,

Genya is the one who faced the most disservice along with David. While there were exceptional parts to both of their plotlines, it's still sad that even if David's death was necessary, we don't get to see the entirety of her grief and the possible anger, and that her kindness is simply used as the justification for lack of portrayal of grief.

It really did take me by surprise, mostly because I wasn't a fan of the original Shadow and Bone book, but seeing David's conscience and self-awareness, along with Genya's (and Zoya thinking of how she wouldn't let any harm come to them, which shows a bit of her development towards her character development), was plenty refreshing. David and Genya were genuinely the highlights of the book and to kill David off was just. doesn't sit right with me.

Leoni and Adrik deserved more page time. They’re saints and immensely capable (no wonder they’re now the Triumvirate), but a few more pages for them to shine would not only have been nice, but also a necessity.

And now, Kuwei...

....

I mean,,, parem should have been the plot, alongside the entire weaponry and the discussion of making a city killer. But uh… that didn’t happen.

There's not much I have to say about Mayu, Tamar and Ehri, except that their plot was superb, only very badly timed.

There's more to talk about them in the remedy tho.

IV. Remedy

Here’s the deal. Before KoS release, there should have been a Nina novella.

Nina is a very important character. All of her potential, alongside many other parts of her personality--from dealing with grief, to accustoming to her powers, to growing stronger--there could be so much to do with her as a protagonist, alongside another character: Mayu.

A whole book dedicated to Nina in Fjerda with Hanne? Brilliant. Show Stopping. Mind blowing. It gives SO much page time to explore not just Nina and Mayu, Hanne, but also Zoya, Leoni and Inej. All together.

How?

Nina’s plotline carries the entire medical effects of the use of parem, just as Mayu’s will carry the pain she feels about her brother being a part of the khergud program. The novella will give ample time to flesh them out as characters and protagonists, each dealing with plot problems and problems of their own--like the loss of ones powers and newfound responsibilities, and the shared loss of a beloved person in parallel, even if neither Nina or Mayu interact on page.

Fjerda and Shu Han could be tied together with one chapter as a POV from Zoya (or maybe two), who, along with the Triumvirate and Nikolai, are completely at loss with the political scenario in the country, and are debating over what should be the course of action. Zoya receives news from the scouts, and missives from Nina, and Tamar takes care of the information she garners from the rest of the network, including Shu Han.

Like, the entire surprise of finding a Zoya POV, from a character whom until CK we’ve known as cold hearted and stern and not giving a fuck about anything or anyone, be humanized in that one chapter, thereby building up the anticipation for her arc,,, the very potential,,, *chef's kiss*.

And by the end of book, we could have an POV--or maybe a cameo if not a POV--of Inej meeting Nina on one of her travels of slave hunting. Inej could help take care that the women that Nina has rescued (as Nina does in KoS) reach the Ravkan shorelines safely. But, for a price.

The entire parallels between Leoni and Hanne and Nina could be set up, while also building up the narrative for the Saints’ plotline with Adrik's, Leoni's and Nina’s powers (like it was at the end of KoS). KoS and RoW would thereby continue it by tackling the weaponization and the antidote, Sainthood and the rest of the politics of it all.

Coming to Shu Han: one key aspect that I’d love to have explored would be the importance of art, during or despite the war. Of how war or pain chips away culture, while detailing on the ill effects of it from the commoners' perspectives, from the soldiers etc. Art is integral to Shu Han and could be portrayed by Mayu’s pain finding balm in poetry, of seeing glimpses of Ehri poring over poetry also mayri ftw, of politics that Makhi is weaving against Ravka, etc.

Or also add some more length to Zoya’s POV and explore a bit of Tamar and Tolya and Kuwei’s interactions and perspective added to it, of missing a home that they seemed to not know, or know; of discussing culture and differences on the basis of where they’re from (maybe the twins are from the borders, while Kuwei grew up near the capital or somewhere distant from the borders etc.), all while directly pointing at Zoya’s heritage and how it ebbs at her conscience, no matter how much she wants to bury it.

POTENTIAL !!!

Like,,, Nina novella would have been too powerful. It would have been perfect. I think I’d excuse bringing back the Darkling too if this was the case. (Or maybe not).

But welp.

Hey, thanks for reading! Not sure if you could make it this far, but if you have, you honestly deserve a medal for sitting through this all. I can’t imagine how tiring it must be to read through this, considering it seemed to take it more than month to compile this there’s also me procrastinating on it too so i’,mbhbdhshfsdn

Drop an ask if you want to talk more about this!

Sincerely, thank you!!!

[captnjacksparrow]

I wish people would stop caring about the canon pairings and marriages in Naruto/Boruto because they should have absolutely no relevance for SNS shippers in terms of validating said ship. Those who say we are delusional because “Well, Naruto married Hinata so she is THE one he loves!” (I'll focus more on Naruto's marriage here... Is Sasuke's even a marriage?) simply don’t get that it just doesn't really matter who Naruto and Sasuke married because that in no way diminishes their feelings for each other. The main plot of the series revolves around the bond between Naruto and Sasuke. It is their story. They are each other's most important people and this was established back in Land of Waves arc even before the dramatic events that take place on the bridge - the whole point of that very first arc was making this a fact right from the beginning, because the story has always been and was always supposed to be about the two of them and the profound love and understanding that grows between them ever since they exchanged glances, smiles and pouts as lonely little broken kids. No reason to list all proof of their feelings and bond here, it has been done extensively, and if somebody watched the show/read the manga and missed it, they are missing half a brain. That these boys love each other more than anyone else is absolutely obvious.

So what about the canon pairings? Kishimoto stated time and time again that his focus was never romance, and that is not because he can't write romance as we know it (he clearly did), but it’s a matter of concept: what HE considers romance is the attraction that unites people with the purpose of marriage (confessing your romantic love for japanese people is the same as saying you want to be in a relationship, because feelings shouldn’t be voiced without an intention), and that, to him, is NOT the greatest expression of love, nor does it represent the most special bond two people can share.

It is understandable that westerners put so much weight into marriage because we consider it the epitome of love. Well, the truth is marriage in Japanese culture is mainly the only socially admissible means to have children and has very little to do with romantic love. In fact, in Japanese literature, it is much more common for unmarried couples to love each other than married ones. Obviously, there is no absolute truth when it comes to feelings and human relationships, what I'm doing here is generalising social norms and expectations (not exposing my opinion on them - that would turn this rant into something else entirely). A large number of Japanese marriages are loveless (and arranged, but no point getting into that either) and what motivates choosing a spouse is their ability to fulfill familial duties, meaning: is the woman good mother and consequently wife material? Is she going to devote her life to taking care of her children, house and husband, the noblest of acts for a female? Is the man willing and capable of putting his occupation above everything else, working extremely hard and for long hours, with total dedication and diligence for his job, to the point of not even seeing his family most of the time, as an honorable man should do as a provider? That's what makes a GOOD married couple: two people following their expected and strict gender-roles in a nuclear child-centered family (again, please, this is not MY opinion!). What a Japanese man should want in a woman is for her to be a dedicated housewife and mother, since having children outside of marriage is not only frowned upon, it is not acceptable at all, and not being married with children is not respectable enough (same with being divorced). Marriage is, therefore, NOT a symbol of undying love and a deep and special connection between two people, rather, it’s a partnership established with the goal of having and raising children.

Do these descriptions ring any bells?

In conclusion: the pairings were, in fact, created for the sole purpose of bringing forth the next generation, and that was made CANONICALLY true. Would it have been better if they hadn’t gone down that "safe" route? Hell, yeah! It would have been fucking amazing and could even have been groundbraking, for several reasons. BUT as unsatisfying as it may be, the fact is they chose a very TRADITIONAL depiction of marriage that has little to do with feelings, and that in itself shouldn’t be taken lightly, since it leaves the strongest bond, which is grounded on genuine love, untouched. In this scenario, justifying romantic love through marriage alone won’t cut it, and trying to discredit the obvious unmatched connection and feelings between two characters because they never got married to each other or married someone else is ludicrous. Yeah, a married couple can love each other deeply and above anyone else, but that is just not what marriage is ABOUT in Japanese culture and definitely not what Kishimoto wanted us to believe was the case here after dedicating 699 chapters to a story about the special bond between two boys that didn’t culminate in marriage. 

You know what IS a symbol of romantic love in Japan? Being willing to die together when the love you feel goes against your moral obligations, holding on to the belief that you will be reunited in the afterlife, where you will be free of any burden and able to love freely.

Are more bells being rung?! 

Oh, some bonus info: We also tend to associate sex with romantic love. Well, Japanese married couples with children rarely have sex, if at all. After a woman becomes a mother, she is no longer considered sexually desirable and becomes a mother figure to her husband as well (what happened to Hinata’s big "attributes" in Boruto? Huh). This is especially true when couples sleep in separate rooms and the mother shares a bed with her children. (Hinata co-sleeps with Himawari and we know Naruto sleeps in a separate room. Just saying.)

What's your say?

Is Sasuke's even a marriage?

Geezz!!!! LoLLLLL!!!! This sentence just made me cackle so hard for a good 5 minutes, Anon!!!!!

Hmmm.... So let's get back to your ask.

Well, I don't know how to react to this ask, Anon. Because, I don't know whether you are from Japan or you have a very close Japanese friend who might've told you all these cultural thing about marriage and relationships.

So, what I am going to do is to analyze from the facts you have provided , combine with my own cultural relevance and provide my answer. If there is any Japanese readers who are reading this, you can confirm or dispel this by sending me an ask. But again, I don't want exceptional case like, 'No, my family is different'. I want to know about the general lifestyle of a common citizen and their married life.

Having said that, this ask made me just yell at myself, 'Goshh!!!! Seriously???'

Because whatever you said, It fucking exist in my country too and is still followed by almost 70% of people in my country and I absolutely detest it. That is,

Most of the marriages here are loveless nd arranged - Check

Is the woman good mother and consequently wife material? Is she going to devote her life to taking care of her children, house and husband, the noblest of acts for a female? - Check

People following their expected and strict gender-roles in a nuclear child-centered family - Check Check

What a man should want in a woman is for her to be a dedicated housewife and mother, since having children outside of marriage is not only frowned upon, it is not acceptable at all, and not being married with children is not respectable enough (same with being divorced). - Check Check

Marriage is, therefore, NOT a symbol of undying love and a deep and special connection between two people, rather, it’s a partnership established with the goal of having and raising children. - Awww!!! A million Check.

That's why I was envious of Western people in this aspect, because they have a freedom to choose their own partner without any time constraints and when they do, their marriage can be said to be 'The Epitome of Love'.

My parents marriage is also an arranged one. And whenever they have disagreement and that leads to verbal war, they let out this words, 'I'm here with you because of my 2 daughters otherwise I would've left you long back'. So... Yeah. Here, most of the marriages are child-centered. Again, it's not just my opinion. Majority of the arranged marriage based family revolve around their child.

And I was born, a year after my parents' marriage, and If I hadn't been born, then people will question my parent's fertility factor and start to discriminate them. So, I can boldly claim that, I was not born out of Love or something. I was born because of social obligations.

But it doesn't mean, my parents don't love each other now. How should I say???? It's like a Stockholm Syndrome??!!!! Like when you stay with a person for a long time, you will eventually start to develop some feelings over the course of the time. It took them 15 years to come to a complete understanding of each other. It's the same case with many couples here.

Considering all these, Sasuke never even stayed with Sakura enough to make her understand him, So I wonder what kind of couple are they????? Weird!!!!!

In conclusion: the pairings were, in fact, created for the sole purpose of bringing forth the next generation, and that was made CANONICALLY true.

Awww!!!! Man, Seriously???? I made this claim long back in this post where I said, these women were used as a tool to bring out Next Generation Kids. My claim was based on Analytical Perspective.

And then one of the rabid SS stan reblogged my post and pulled out a hetero card stating, 'They are married and blah blahh...' when in reality, I never discussed about their sexuality in that post. That post was purely based on the number of pages each hetero couples shared with each other against the number of pages Sasuke & Naruto shared together.

Now, you have provided a cultural perspective for those shitty canon pairings.

On one side, I feel the need to smirk, because I am right.

But on the other side, I feel bad like, 'Is this how, this show must go on?? What are you trying to convey from this?'.

You know what IS a symbol of romantic love in Japan? Being willing to die together when the love you feel goes against your moral obligations, holding on to the belief that you will be reunited in the afterlife, where you will be free of any burden and able to love freely.

Hmmm.... It's interesting to know this. Anon.

This is where it differs slightly in my country.

Romantic love here is,

No matter what happens, I'll stand with you, You are just not alone. I will leave my fucking clan, parents, relatives if they don't approve you and we will start a new life somewhere.

[[Here, marriages happen mostly between their clan members. If you love a person from another clan, you will be ostracized or tortured or honour killed by your very parents. It just differs from clan to clan. I was subjected to this same problem and that's why I hate my Clan and left my parents. And this is also one of the reason why I love Itachi. Because we share similar Ideals. That is, Not to be obsessed over your clan and think beyond this restriction.

Also, here in Asian Culture if someone is willing to leave their family (when they don’t approve you) and prefer you over everything.... It means.... that's some Love beyond Comprehension. Just like how Naruto was willing to leave his Family (like Sakura and Kakashi) and like to stand with Sasuke... Just like how Naruto was willing to leave his own family and go on a long mission with Sasuke]]

So does it remind you of anything?????

It's the whole SNS dynamics starting from their childhood to VoTE2. That's why I started to ship SNS, because it represents the true love we always wish for.

Would it have been better if they hadn’t gone down that "safe" route? Hell, yeah! It would have been fucking amazing and could even have been groundbraking, for several reasons. BUT as unsatisfying as it may be, the fact is they chose a very TRADITIONAL depiction of marriage that has little to do with feelings, and that in itself shouldn’t be taken lightly, since it leaves the strongest bond, which is grounded on genuine love, untouched. In this scenario, justifying romantic love through marriage alone won’t cut it

This is very true, Anon.

I mean, they don’t even have to take a groundbreaking route. 

They should have given everyone an open ending, just like Kishi left at chapter 699. What is the need of a marriage, if Naruto is going to adopt Kawaki??? If Orochimaru was going to create a Baby Artificially?? If Rock Lee is going to have a child out of nowhere???

But I am happy that SNS bond is the only one that wasn’t diminished in this hot mess called Burrito. So, atleast we should be happy about that.

When someone pulls the marriage card, I just block them immediately because they are not even worth having a good conversation. NH will pull out the Last movie and SS will pull out, ‘Sasuke called Sakura ‘My Wife’.... So, it’s just pointless.

So, to conclude

Considering my Analytical perspective, I already made earlier in other post and your ask which provides some insight about Japanese culture which eerily resembles the culture I belong to, It all makes sense that this whole pairings and trash is just for the sake of bringing out Next Generation series and those boys never loved those girls whole heartedly. And I agree with you on this.

[rinharu-purple]

On Jealousy

I owe this analysis/answer to an anon ask which I've accidentally posted, though only with the introduction sentence and then couldn't retrieve.🙈

Dear anon, this analysis is dedicated to you.

I HOPE YOU SEE THIS!!! 🙏🏻💫🙏🏻

Thank you @sin-with-quiche for proofreading and @lunabai78 for the spiritual support 💕💕💕

---—-----—

We have quite a number of moments in our journey with Gavin... Some are funny, some are cute, some are...mmm over the edge

(。-ω-)ﾉ

If you ask me whether Gavin is a jealous man, I would give you two answers:

1) Pre and early relationship... Absolutely!

2) Established relationship... The fitting colloquial term is "territorial".

In order to look at Gavin's attitude towards other males and whether to categorize them as jealous behaviour or not, first we need to describe jealousy .

Jealousy generally refers to the thoughts or feelings of insecurity, fear, and concern over a relative lack of possessions or safety.

The word stems from the French jalousie, formed from jaloux (jealous), and further from Low Latin zelosus (full of zeal), in turn from the Greek word ζήλος (zēlos), sometimes "jealousy", but more often in a positive sense "emulation, ardour, zeal" (with a root connoting "to boil, ferment"; or "yeast").

As you can see, there are different set of emotions that might boil or ferment the reaction of jealousy in one's belly.

My personal take on this is that jealousy arises from two simple things 1) Lack of self-confidence 2) Lack of trust towards one's partner (in terms of romantic jealousy). You don't get jealous when you know you're one hell-of-a-mate and are with the right person. Which is why as we will see in a minute Gavin fits the bill at the beginning but afterwards his jealousy isn't actually jealousy at all!

So which sets of emotions lead to his jealous behaviour and in which conjuncture?

We know that Gavin is completely attuned to MC. This also applies for his reaction towards the presence of other guys around her. So the type of jealousy he displays is attuned to MCs type of reaction to the source of his jealousy. He observes MCs aura and attitude carefully and then reacts in an either desirous, protective, territorial or downright pouty manner.

If he sees the person is overstepping their boundaries like TNTs Tyson or the guys catcalling her during Romantic Date, he gets protective. If he sees someone from his inner cycle being only the slightest overfamiliar with MC as in his phone call with Eli, he gets territorial and draws boundaries. If he gets ditched by MC and walks on her having lunch with another guy all the while she's being touched by him and she's not showing any protest, he pouts in the corner and stabs MC with his words "Too much of anything can get boring after a while" (love this moment and how Joe delivers this line with a strong tonation on the word - boooring-)

If he sees the person is actually drawing MCs attention, well... This is where we can look more into. Because this is actually a stereotypical example of making one jealous. Seeing your love interest with another person in an over-friendly manner.

In Trio Date, he worries that MC might have a crush on Kiro and a close relationship with him. Which is understandably an alarming situation for him, because he isn't that close to her himself and Kiro is... well... Kiro. Pretty much everyone's into him 🌟. But Gavin doesn't show any aggression or envy towards Kiro. On the contrary, he praises him for his charm and even says that he can see what people mean by that as in confessing to being charmed by Kiro himself. I really praise how elegant Gavin acts in the face of this situation 👑 Needless to say, it's a Gavin date, meaning the canon couple in this scenario is Gavin x MC (On a side note pretty bold and disrespectful of PG to put another LI in the supporting male role in a date for another tbh) And also RIP Chandler, the poor guy didn't do anything wrong ^_^

At this point I need to let one thing out of my chest though. I can't say that I appreciate him telling MC when and where to wear revealing clothes <spoiler alert> only for him. Even though we don't actually see him seriously forbidding her to wear them I think it would be better to leave her be the judge of it. But considering the fact that she gets catcalled even at his presence I can kinda see why Gavin gets protective here. On a side note, his girlfriend isn't better on this matter either. MC covers Gavin's body at the beach during 2021 summer event in CN server so that other girls don't drool over him 🤣 These two have some homework to do in that department I tell you that 😅

In the more mature phases of their relationship, we no longer see Gavin feeling himself threatened by the presence of another male. AT ALL! All Gavin jealousy after this point is only because someone is overstepping their boundaries and making "his girl" uncomfortable.

Gavin might be the one acting jealous the most frequently among the LIs, but he never ever gets possessive over her, limits her freedom or makes unconfirmed self proclaims on behalf of her. Being possessive over someone objectifies them and the moment you objectify a person, you no longer need to be in a relationship with them tbh. Leaving your partner room to breathe and respecting their personal space is important and Gavin does this the best alongside with Kiro. We also never see Kiro getting possessive, limiting or doing anything of that nature with MC.

Further in their relationship Gavin still acts jealous, but in an extremely cute, pure and harmless way. Be it against prankster ghosts, animals she's met in the middle of the desert, a wild child, service dogs, birds and co. Basically anyone and anything that diverts her attention from him for more than a nanosecond can be perceived as a threat but an adult male 😂At his core, Gav-babe wants MC all for himself but his jealousy is actually only adorkable.

(´∀｀)♡

In the main story, however, there is a certain LI which becomes the magnet for Gavin's firsthand jealousy and even kinda provokes this. And this is actually what I am dying to write about in this post😈. It only happens at the beginning of the story, but I love it so much and therefore it must be in this post.

Gavin shows signs of jealousy towards one particular LI at various occasions and that is...

Gavin shows obvious signs of jealousy towards our genius scientist and that is completely understandable! Lucien is the one who makes his advances first and is the most straightforward one throughout the main story. Plus, he lives right next to MC and, let's be honest here, is the only one who toys with MC's poor hormones the most. Just to give one example:

Gavin and MC don't become quite a couple before CH12 and S1 Gavin has some issues with self-worth and confidence (towards MC). When he meets MC again after 6 years, he is perplexed and is fairly clueless as to how to approach her romantically. Lest Gavin making the wrong moves, he acts weirdly around MC which further confuses her. Gav-babe is really weird at the beginning of the story 😅

The first time we see Gavin getting jealous about Lucien is in CH2, when he and MC spend a prolonged period of time for the first time as they investigate the time warping incident. Our birdcop is hopelessly in love with MC so when he sees her become so red on the phone with another person, he gets worked up.

Fun trivia, Joe's reaction to this moment can be found here

The second instance is when MC spends two nights in a row with Lucien in CH5 and then falls asleep in her office.

It is crucial to remember at this point that up to CH5, MC seems to be most romantically involved with Lucien and spends most of her time with him. LuLu mercilessly teasing her and flirting with her doesn't help much in that sense either because he is actively making advances on her. Thus announcing his candidacy for "Mr. Love". So when Gavin catches MC spending nights following Lucien, having phone calls with him, living right next door to him, working closely with him and blushes because of him, it's fairly understandable that our birdcop gets fairly jealous because at that point in the story Lucien seems to have a better shot at love with her than he does.

Btw, MC flatlines on his question as to who is the resource of her flustering this time around and doesn't explain herself ;)

Interestingly though, in the third instance, where Gavin sees MC and Lucien, he isn't jealous at all! In the famous "Rude Awakening" moment, the vibes we get at first is as if Gavin walks in to MC and Lucien. But actually our protective boyfriend is there to save MCs life. What's more, he doesn't give credit to Lucien's provocations, such as when he calls Gavin "dangerous" or pulls MC behind him, stays extremely close to her and plays the "protective boyfriend" in front of him. On Gavin's defense, the one actually saves MCs life and protects her is Gavin here as he deflects the bullet shot at her.¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Furthermore, he asks Lucien to take MC home, albeit not before telling her that he will be contacting her later, signaling to Lucien that he shouldn't stick along for long. A highly subtle way of "marking his territory", much like a wolf would. God I love this scene both in the main story and in the anime.

It is necessary to mention at this point that the chapter following this scene revolves around Gavin and MC clearing all kinds of misunderstandings between them and MC trying to bind with him. Hence laying the first stones in the temple of their relationship. After that point we no longer see Gavin showing any kind of jealousy towards anyone. So mark CH7 people ;)

----—-----—-----—

You know what I would love to see? Gavin getting jealous over Shaw. I wonder whether he even knows that MC spends time with him 🤔 Too bad that PG has left the idea "brother conflict".

If you would like to read another perspective on this, Cheri has posted her analysis here

[letarasstuff]

Breaking Protocol

(A/N): This was requested by an anon. I hope you like it, I really enjoyed writing for JJ for the first time :)

Summary: What will happen, if JJ isn't technically allowed to tell her family about the Anthrax Attack, but tries to do it anyways?

Warnings: Mentions of a sick child, Spencer eats Jell-O, so food

Wordcount: 1.8k

✨Masterlist✨ __________________________________

JJ always says that even though she is a communication liaison for the FBI, she is a mother first. This is something she promised her daughter when she first began to work there. And she is set on keeping that promise.

But today it turns out to be more difficult than ever. Hotch’s strict instruction to keep the information about the Anthrax Attack in the circle of the BAU and the military forbids the mother to say anything to her family. Still, her family is constantly on her mind.

If she is right, Will planned a trip with one year old Henry and 14 years old (Y/N) to the park. JJ can’t think about anything but her most important people in the world laying in the ER, coughing their lungs out and spluttering blood, while she is stuck at the office with the power to warn them.

Spencer comes into her office, asking for a certain file. “Spence, what would you do if your family is in potential danger?” He stops for a second to think about it: “Given the fact that my mother is in a sanctorium with guards and medical staff, I consider her pretty low risk and can’t put myself in a situation where she is in real danger. So I take all of you and since I see you as my family and the people that keep me going I think I would do anything to keep you safe.”

She looks up at him with her blue eyes. “Even if it means to break protocol?” “Especially if it means to break protocol”, he answers her firmly, exactly knowing what she means. Spencer knows that her little family means the world and more to her. If anything happens to them she would never be the same.

Meanwhile JJ sits there contemplating putting her job on the line for an eventually that maybe isn’t even true, Will runs around the house frantically.

“Maybe I can go and get some? I’m sure we can’t disturb mom at work”, (Y/N) suggests as she tries to console the crying Henry in her arms. Her stepdad considers the offer. They originally wanted to go to the park to have a small picnic and maybe even invite JJ to meet them there on her lunch break. But Henry caught something overnight and the only thing he does is crying and puking.

Will is looking for any kind of medicine, but he can’t find anything appropriate for children. “I guess you are right. Do you know which one we need? I’ll try to get him to sleep or calm down at least. Thank you so much, (Y/N), you are a lifesaver.”

“Of course, I do anything. When I get lost or something at the pharmacy I can still call you, right?” He nods while taking his son out of her arms in order for her to be able to put on her shoes. “Good, then see you soon. I’ll hurry up.”

(Y/N) takes her bike and decides to use the shortcut through the park. It’s a nice sunny day with a warm soft breeze going through the bushes. In moments like these the teenager knows that the world is alright. That somehow everything will be good. Always.

Buying the needed medicine for her baby brother takes place without any complications and soon she is back on track with her bike. Shortly before reaching her house, the teenager’s phone is ringing.

In case that Will needs something else (Y/N) has turned her ringtone on. Surprisingly it’s her mother, she sees after descending her bike and looks at the caller ID.

“Hey Mom, is everything ok? Did something happen?” As sad as this may sound, but in 90% it’s the case that she was hurt on her job or anybody else when she calls (Y/N) during her workday.

But JJ is relieved to hear her daughter safe and sound. “(Y/N), honey. Everything is fine. Did you go to the park with Henry and Will?” Slowly the girl continues her way back, pushing her bike. “No, we didn’t. Henry got sick overnight, so there is no way we could have taken him. I think it’s just a stomach bug. Will and I couldn’t find any medicine for him, so I did a quick run to the pharmacy. I’m actually on my way back right now. Why are you calling?”

Once again the mother tries to not answer her question. “Aw, poor Henry. Can you tell him that Mommy will be home soo- Wait, to which pharmacy did you go?”

Puzzled by her mother’s sudden harsh tone (Y/N) stops in her tracks. “Mom, what’s the problem? You never call me during work except when something happens. Is anybody in the hospital? Did you get kidnapped? Is this your last call to a loved one? Mom, answer me!” Panic sets in as the silence grows from JJ’s side.

“Honey, please tell me you didn’t go to the one on West Street. Please.” Her begging tone alarms the teenager further. Is this a clue?

“I did, Mom. I took my bike, went through the park to West Street. It’s the closest one and Henry really doesn’t feel good, so I had to hurry up. Can you please tell me what’s going on?!” But her mother stays quiet for several moments, as if she is calculating something.

Being finally fed up with her, (Y/N) speaks again: “If you don’t want to tell me anything, don’t bother call-” She is suddenly cut off by a huge coughing fit.

“(Y/N)? Honey, are you ok?” The agent’s mind goes into momma bear mode, completely ignoring any protocol in the world. But her daughter isn’t able to answer. Too stunned is she by the fact that she just coughed up blood. How is that poss-

“(Y/N), please answer me”, she begs again. “M-mom, I just c-coughed blood.” JJ feels like her heart stops. This can’t be happening.

“Stay calm, (Y/N). I- There- I’ll send people to you. They will come and get you. They will explain to you what this is, they know more about it than I do. I’ll call Will and tell him that you are not coming home. Penelope will ping your phone, just don’t move.”

After a few more reassuring words JJ hangs up and bolts into Hotch’s office. “Hotch, (Y/N) got infected, she rode her bike through the park and back to get medicine for Henry and I told her to stay where she is. That somebody is going to get he-”

Aaron stops her rambling by putting both hands on her shoulder. “I’ll let Doctor Kimura know. Meet them at the hospital.” “Bu-” Again he cuts the blonde off. “No buts. You always say that you are a mother first. Your family, especially your daughter, needs you now more than ever. Go and be a mother.”

Encouraged by her boss’ words she makes her way to her car, simultaneously calling Will to let him know what’s happening.

Shortly after this the small family sits in a hospital room. (Y/N) lays passed out on the bed, paler than anybody has her ever seen. JJ grasps her hand, mentally kicking herself for not calling sooner. For letting regulations destroy her family. Will holds Henry, who finally is asleep, in his arms and tries to console his girlfriend.

“You weren’t allowed to say anything. Also, I wanted to go to another park if Henry wasn’t sick. There was absolutely nothing you could have done differently.” His accent is thicker than ever.

Before she is able to respond, a nurse enters the room with an inhaler in hand. “What is this?” Ever since (Y/N) was admitted to the hospital, the mother is careful to know what they give her and what not.

“This is a cure for this strand, Doktor Reid found it in Nichol’s office. We already tested it and it’s 100% effective.” More or less convinced JJ let’s the nurse do her job, watching her every move like a hawk.

And then they wait again. And wait. And wait for the cure to kick in. For (Y/N) to open her eyes. To be able to form a sentence. A coherent sentence without being interrupted by a coughing fit.

Once JJ leaves her bed reluctantly, Will forces her to take a walk and get a coffee from the cafeteria. On her way back she visits Spencer’s room, who is already awake.

“Hey Spence”, she smiles softly at him. He stops shoving a cup of Jell-O into his mouth to smile back. “Hi. How is (Y/N) doing?” A frown quickly spreads onto her face. “Still not awake. But the doctors say she will be fine. I wanted to thank you. If you wouldn’t have put your life on the line, none of the others would be alive. Thank you, for saving my daughter”, at the end the blonde’s voice breaks. She can’t imagine a life without her oldest child. Without anyone of her family.

“Hey, it’s alright. (Y/N) is fine. I’m fine. Everybody got their own happy end. Now go back to her, I’m sure she’ll wake up in no time.” She nods and gives him a hug before going back to (Y/N)’s room. There she sits back in her seat, handing her boyfriend his own cup of coffee.

A few minutes later a small groan is heard. “Can anybody turn off the sun? It’s unbelievably bright today.” Not registering what’s really happening, the teenager finds herself in a big family hug with Henry on her chest. “Woah, did I fall asleep during our picnic or something?”

JJ smiles through her tears of relief, seeing her daughter being her confused self again. “No, I’ll explain it to you later. Get some more rest, we’ll stay with you.” “Rest, this sounds nice.” Just a few minutes later (Y/N) is asleep again.

Luckily both she and Spencer make a quick recovery and even get a “Welcome Back to the Living” Party (organized by the one and only Penelope Garcia). From this moment on JJ makes sure to warn her family one way or another. Hotch generously lets it slip, acting like he doesn’t know about it after this close of a call.

In the end the only thing that matters is that they all are back to being healthy and make up for the missed picnic.

Taglist:

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@dindjarinsspouse

Criminal Minds:

@averyhotchner @mggsprettygirl @herecomesthewriterwitch