#also i know ive seen someone else going around saying the same thing im just thinking about it again

[sonicunleash]

thinking about that one post that went around where it was like. arguing that stores and restaurants shouldn't be obligated to hold a 12 hours a day open 7 days a week schedule (correct), but then went on to argue that NOTHING should be open late, and also that the people who are ordering food late are all like. self-centered well-off office workers who don't care about your time and thats just. so ridiculous to me as someone who works fast food nights.

like.... i can barely remember any late night customer that matched that description at ALL. 90% o the time people who come in the last hour of us being open are people who worked late-night, low-wage shifts like me, who are likely physically hurting and tired and just want some affordable, low-effort food after a hard shift. And idk the assumption that all these people are just entitled bitches that are a part of the problem just feels inhumane to me? I really feel like there's better ways to make your point without throwing minimum wage late-shift employees under the bus. I promise most of your grievances would be better helped by better pay and a bigger staff (which stems back to having better pay).

[pumpkinsy0]

tldr: @buddyaldridge is a 30 year old weirdo proshipper who talks shit about ppl behind their backs, block em and report if you can/want to

just wanna let everyone know theres a omegaverse mpreg dallyboy writer whos been an all around WEIRDOOOOO cause their brain is LITERALLY porn rotted and they cannot fathom ppl actually having fun at all, their @ is @buddyaldridge aka @pelopsides previously known as @madelynprior

in 2020-2022 the outsiders tumblr they used to be @madelynprior and theyre a hardcore dallyboy stan which is already fucking weird, but on top of that, they would make teen pregnancy omegaverse smut fics which??? and im not gonna give you the ss, nigga im givin yall the LINKKK to see it with your own eyes so you know im not crazy

how ik its them is bc on their acc RIGHT before they switched to their buddyaldridge acc, and before that acc was named “pelopides”, they used to go by “madeleinepryor”, how ik its the same person is bc on a good chunk of their post, theyd tag it as “#madeleinepryor dispatches” on top of that, they just straight up linked their ao3 acc😭😭

heres what the link goes to, they linked their ao3 acc, they just changed their username on ao3 as well from madeleinepryor to greasers

now me calling them a proshipper isnt me talking out of my ass, they say it themselves like ughhhhjjj

as for them talking about other ppl, i wont share ALL the screenshots bc idk if the ppl theyre talking bad about would rlly feel comfortable w those being posted, if they know, they can feel free to post it on their own accord, so like i said, wont share, but i HAVE seen some and i can conform that they have done it, its ABSOLUTELY NOT above them

for now ill post the ss i CAN post rn which just proves my point

now ignoring that theyre talking smack, theyre just so odd and obviously didnt rlly think this through bc 1967 is ALREADY IMPLIED in the 60s, youre just incapable of reading things that arent about teen boys getting it on w each other PLEASE get a grip on reality😭😭

theyve talked about 14 year olds and their post on their acc just to shit on them, once again, GROWN ASS PERSON TWEAKIN OVER THE IDEAS OF A 14 YEAR OLD🗣️🗣️

NOW maybe your asking “how do you know the discord user and the tumblr user are the same person” AND I WILL ADMIT, while i DO have strong feelings they are the same person, its not 100% proven, HOWEVER buddyaldridge DOES go by buddy and that discord users name is buddy, so while its not concrete, the link IS there, once again, feel free to come to whatever conclusion you wanna come to about that

but what ISNT disputable is the fact that theyre a proshitter

additionally just this??? reblog from them????

on its own, not MUCH, bit considering the fics they make this is SO weird like??????

and finally, ive heard that theyve specifically came for me about my haitian shepards and maybe even my heritage, saying that they hated race hcs??????like using me as an example, they ss my acc and talked shit, someone contacted me about it and they dont have ss of it specifically, but they can vouch for it, and im not just gonna dismiss that, bc while they dont have ss, they do have ss and proof of everything else, so i do believe them, and theyve said if they find it they would show them to me, do what you wanna with this info

ANYWAYS buddy, your brain is unironically pornrotted, ur being a lil baby who cant do anything but cry and moan online on discord of all places and ur doing all this as a 30+ year old, and its CRAZIER bc youre doing all this while having “minors dni” in your pinned post, while also writing about minors, in a fandom MOSTLY OF MIDDLE SCHOOLERS!!!! (aka minors!!! ik age is hard for you to grasp) on top of that, literally ANY and ALL race hcs is way more believable and enjoyable than any “ideas” you’ve been cooking up in that odd demented, shriveled up pea brain of urs

anyways yea, that all i have to say, and im speaking for myself here, but i mean this with every fiber of my being, i dont know how you function in life but i DO NOT want you to go any farther, and i think others would/DO feel the same, ive seen what makes you cheer and i am PROUUUDDD to make you BOOOOO, you shouldnt be near minors at all, fictional or non fictional, you should BARELY be near other adults

plus if you go onto their acc rn, notice how when anon called them out, buddy aint even say they were wrong?? JUST SAYIN🗣️🗣️

im tagging everything i can tag bc i DO NOTTTT want mfs interacting w their blog, and want as many ppl as possible to be aware, dont say anything to them, dont give them attention bc obviously they’ll think this is funny and post it on their shitty discord server or whatever and giggle like they arent a grown ass nigga w bills to pay, trying so hard to cling onto their high school days, making fics about a canon middle schooler getting banged and pregnant, pls block and report do whatever u wanna do, just plssss dont let this proshitter on this damn sight near kidssss😭😭

dont take this as me WANTING drama, i dont, i just dont want ppl coming in this fandom thinking posting this shit and doing this is ok, youre bullying ppl for doing harmless things meanwhile your just making straight porn about a weird ship left n right, thinking YOUUUUU of all ppl have the place to talk about anyone or anything like your opinion on anything is valid😭😭

you NEED stones thrown at you

if anyone has anymore ss send em to mmeeeeee, but in the mean time ill be doin my own thing wooooo‼️‼️🔥🔥

[coffeesleep-ooc]

Binghe nicknames

Today im reflecting in LBH’s nicknames, like, SQQ’s nicknames for him, fandom nicknames for him and SQH’s nicknames for him

why you ask? Because my brain is full of sv brainworms, that’s all

Now, this may have some inconsistencies bc it’s what I believe and im by no means chinese…let’s start with the most common ones to name a small Binghe

We have things like bingbing, binghe, white lotus, little sheep and bunhe. The first two look fairly straightforward no? From what ive seen, in chinese using a character of a person’s name repeatedly like this denotes a cutesy way of calling them, and calling someone by their name alone (as long as it has enough characters for that) is a sign of being close. LBH obviously loves SQQ calling him Binghe, nobody else gets that privilege! Even NYY calls him A-Luo and not Binghe, even though that is another way to denote closeness, I don’t believe its the same for him!

let’s go with bunhe, this is (as far as i know, do correct me if im wrong) a fandom’s name for the lil guy, im guessing it came from the english part of the fandom since its a play on his name and in chinese the term for bun would be bao/baozi(?) depending on the type of bun so it wouldn’t be as cute to call him baohe(?) sounds like another person entirely lol

but! Bun makes you think of a round white and soft ball, safe and sweet, unless you are of course, not chinese like me and at first you thought of a golden brownish ball of hot bread, which would work anyways bc freshly made bread it’s delicious and soft. Anyways, i kinda prefer the chinese imagery of bun for this dumb reason ill present to you: Bunhe is a soft round baby, you can nom his cheeks and squeeze him and call him only to see him following cutely! Its the best! But also, when you break the surface you reveal there’s a spicy filling that will leave your mouth stinging and your stomach warm and content, the problem is though, that your white little bao is now in pieces and you can’t reconstruct it, the white surface has been stained with the spicy red from hell and the bitterness of betrayal…but the sweet exterior is still there and it has shifted to become a delicious dish filled with the flavor of home.

am i getting too lost?

lets go back to nicknames! SY gives him the nicknames of little white lotus and little sheep. The second one is pretty self-explanatory, LBH follows him around everywhere like sheep tend to do (also, this is why little duckling also works) but! The consensus in the fandom is that he has curly hair right? Well, imagine a little boy with fluffy hair following you around and trying to help you with everything? It’s impossible not to want to pat his head and squeeze him, so little sheep it is.

now, i’ve seen that sv fandom uses white lotus a lot! SY himself uses it if I remember correctly, but i feel like sometimes we forget where it truly comes from and what SQQ is saying when he calls LBH that, its true that LBH is like a flower, whilting or flourishing on command like SQQ is his sun, his earth and his water. But from other novels i’ve read, I’ve realized that calling someone a white lotus is not necessarily a compliment! In chinese slang a white lotus is someone that looks pure and kind, respectful and pretty, just like the lotus flower peacefully and beautifully resting on a pond, but it also tells us that such a person has a hidden agenda, a hidden side to their personality just like the lotus has roots in the dirt, underwater where we can’t see, its growing and taking advantage of the nutrients of the deepest parts of the earth, so it’s someone “muddy” and “dirty” that presents themselves kind, pure and innocent!

Which means- that SQQ is calling LBH this to remind himself that even though this cute lil boy is obedient and sweet now, he will (in SQQ’s mind at least) torture him and show his true colors later on the road, after he has been utterly betrayed. I quite like this nickname because of how innocent it looks at first, and how sweetly SQQ is usually portrayed while calling LBH this, but he actually knows deep down that he is possibly playing with fire, and even so, he chooses to care and to ahow love to LBH -sobs-

LBH post canon ends up with a lot of trauma, attachment issues and insecurities, and SQQ calling him white lotus shows that he knew about LBH’s bad sides since the beginning. BUT. He. Doesn’t. Communicate. That!!!!! This dumbass!!!! (Affectionate)

Now, there’s also the nicknames SQQ-SQH use to differentiate the Binghes, and i find it incredibly funny too. There’s Bingge (Bing from his name and Ge from older brother), not only called older brother bc he is the original, but also because he is ruthless and cool beyond expectations (we see in the extras, that he is very intelligent and cunning, but equally as shizun starved smhw) he is strong and much more serious and bitter than his counterpart, not to mention the sheer number of women he has (which, as stallion power fantasy, would make him “more manly” but that’s another topic), so, older brother it is!

Sv LBH is usually called Binghe or even ‘my son’ by SQH, which i find hilarious bc SQQ hates it, he doesn’t want to acknowledge SQH as LBH’s father even if he is the creator. This is obviously a running joke but it makea me think of SQQ then accusing SQH of also marrying his own son (MBJ) which would be extremely funny and SQH would be mortified.

anyways, LBH is also calles Bingmei (Bing for his name and mei for little sister) and this is where it gets interesting, because they clearly could have chosen didi (little brother) but didn’t! And this reinforces the comedic role of LBH, he isn’t just a gay protagonist, he is a gay protagonist that - following the advise of his (unknown) creator/shishu - acts like a total maiden throwing a massive tantrum to get SQQ’s attention, he cries like a little girl, he tugs on SQQ’s sleeve with big watery eyes and becomes his housewife. Not only that, but his insecurities are exaggerated by his acting and it gives the impression of him having a massive maiden heart that will die dramatically if her husband doesn’t pay attention to her 25/7 (no, the 5 is not a typo), and it’s true that he has a maiden heart, but he can live without the 25/7 attention, he is just that dramatic. And obviously lets not forget about the picture of a previously ruthless stallion protagonist in the transmigrators’ minds actually turning into this kind of person that acts frail and cute for his husband, it’s just too much for them, and so, he gets called little sister, like a spoiled younger sister, the apple of her parent’s eye. Honestly when i first read that nickname I couldn’t stop laughing for a long while.

finally im going to babble about LBH’s nicknames for himself, we have, this disciple and this husband which are very contradictory but funny when used together. This disciple is not a special title or anything, because for LBH, he is *not* someone that should be special in any way, he just wants to be special to SQQ, who he adores and admires and wants to always protect. Many ppl call themselves ‘this disciple’ to address SQQ, its a way to denote their status and their willingness to be taught by him, to have a familial relationship outside of blood. Now, this is important to LBH bc he feels like he belongs somewhere calling himself this, especially bc he had no home before, and after when he was part of the peak he was singled out as special but in a bad way, so I believe that he just wants to belong somewhere, to a home. Later on, its also important to him because its a reassurance that SQQ still recognizes him as his family. This disciple, for SQQ is like a threat, but for LBH is a way of asking ‘do you still want me?’ ‘Do you see im the same person you shared your home with?’ And that SQQ doesn’t dare reclaim him at first hurts him bc he yearns to go back to being his disciple, cared for and protected under his master’s sleeve. But LBH also wants more than that if he can have it, and this is when the abandonment issues kick again. He calls himself ‘this husband’ in tears, because he got what he wanted and what he was sure he didn’t deserve for being himself, it’s again, a reassurance of his position in SQQ’s live and in his heart, it means he has the power to *stay*, which is the most important thing for him.

Ill finish here bc im getting mushy and weepy and i need to write and read more fic, thanks for coming to read my babbles and do tell me if there’s something or some nickname i missed and you want it studied too! 💖

[ciaran]

"do you think people are so simple, so easily understood—while you yourself are above it all, the sole experiencer of complexity and contradiction?" tbh that's often an idea that i fight off, but when i complain about not being understood by other people, they try to stroke my ego saying that i'm just smarter and superior and it bothers me. i don't want to be smarter than everyone else, i learnt so much just so i could communicate better and now i don't even have that. i just don't know how to make it possible to be understood.

i was also told that i was smarter and better than other people and that they would never understand me and i hated that. like i want to be known, i want to communicate, i dont want to be an island. i think what helped me personally was giving up on the idea that there is going to be some perfect magical knowing that opens me surgically and instantly lays us bare to each other. and to treat even superficial, ordinary conversations as though they are real connections. the eye contact i make w a woman at work when i refuse to play along w a weird joke on her behalf is Also connection. and i think like, most people are not going to Know me. they arent going to see me deeply or find me interesting or be able to understand what im trying to say. but one thing is...im willing to iterate. im willing to say the same things over and over in different ways until a way of saying it clicks, or until it sinks in...ive waited years for my mom to understand what my brain is like and she still doesnt get it but ive come a long way since what was when i was a teenager. i repeat myself a lot, i repeat myself to a lot of people, i find old ways of saying things and new ones. and these...processes of trying to be understood by others should not be a diminishing or a culling of the self to only that which is intelligible to an audience, hopefully, but there is a method to finding...common ground. and the way to find common ground is to listen to people closely, to listen to what they say and how they say it, and to find those threads...im not saying i find it easy. but when you look at what youve experienced, your feelings...the range of human emotion is not infinite. we all know shame, listlessness, terror, lust, the loneliness of being on the outside of something, the hurt of not being heard. don't look for people to have felt things in the same way, shape, or intensity as you. look for ways to say, when you catch these notes, "i know what that feels like, even though it was different for me - i know what you mean." what does being understood mean to you? does it mean that you talk and someone Gets you? or does it mean that...you look for what is inside you in the world around like piecing together a puzzle? listening to others, not because you are their therapist or anything of the sort, but because in the story they tell you might find some trace of yourself? all human connection should be selfish because unselfish connection is worse, its charity. if you have friends, i hope you are their friend for your sake as much or more than their sake. and if you listen to people closely, i hope you do it because you're looking for that point from which you start building connection and understanding. and sometimes people have to be taught to understand you, but often they want to learn, if you have a way of teaching it. you must imagine people as eager too, and lonely, and in need of being seen. you must imagine that someone out there feels what you do and the only way to find them is to talk to people.

[lains-reality]

i think im finally (starting to at least) get nondualism. i think i just understood it intellectually before? i have been feeling very stuck and scared that i was just repeating the same cycle i did when i practiced loa. i felt like i was switching between knowing i wasnt the ego to getting attached again and not understanding i wasnt that. today i remembered seeing someone say that you can see that you are not the ego by either observing or self-inquiry. i found self-inquiry annoying and like it never got me far and observation felt impossible since i believed the ego to be me, so i thought more on self-inquiry just for the hell of it.

i thought about the body first. it exists. where? the world. the world just is, i said. well there are other things in the world, why do i take myself for this? because i observe the world through it? because it doesnt go out of my awareness? but it does. just like everything else, i am not always conscious of my body. as far as i know, everything only exists in my awareness. i dont know of it elsewhere. even things i know i dont know exist because i am Aware i dont know of them. i am aware and so the thing exists not the other way around( not really before either cuz everything is now) but im always with my mind am i not? nd tells me i am not but even when i dream its still the mind influencing the dream. this point is where i usually got stuck before but i continued. i asked myself, when has the mind disappeared from my awareness? i thought about meditation. when you meditate, you may notice a thought or a feeling, but you allow it and are indifferent to it, then it disappears. eventually you arent having any thoughts, and you are likely not aware of the body. also made me think of the void state which i havent experienced but everyone ive seen describe their experience described what i did. everything was gone but their awareness. its called the void state for a reason, theres NOTHING.

so anyway it made me realize that i really dont know that anything else exists but me. yknow truly realize it lol. everything fades from my awareness on a day to day basis but i am still there. i just felt like sharing esp since it could help someone who is struggling. ive sent you a couple asks before and youve been very helpful so thank you

thank you for this!

also about always being with your mind - in your sleep there's no mind!

and with thoughts dissolving - they do that already. when you think a thought, it dissolves when a new one is made. thoughts are constantly passing through and soon they'll slow down. :)

[definitelynotshouting]

MMMMMMM SPACE AU IS GOING TO MAKE ME BRAINROT ABOUT THE LANGAUCW BARRIERS AAAAAAAAAAAA

thinking about the fucking ✨I n t i m a c y✨ of learning each other’s body languages and routines/habits and slowly falling in love with the more subtle parts of each other rather than through simply getting to know each other. ALSO ALSO ALSO WITH ALIENS!!!!!! I cannot fucking BEGIN to stress the importance of physical touch. Coming from someone who grew up shipping spirk, PHYSICAL TOUCH IS LITERALLY EVERYTHING. The small gestures, learning each other’s cultural and personal boundaries and adjusting to that even if it’s smth small like, avoiding touching direct skin. Showing that they care, and are considerate at the same time. Other things like trying each other’s native foods that they love, or watching the stars in complete silence together. Just UGH, language barriers are so fucking important to me bc it literally leaves them to fall in love with ALL of each other. Not just their upfront personality, or sense of humor, or manner of speaking, but EVERYTHINNGG. GOD IM GOING TO GO INSANE BC OF THIS WAYAGGGHHHHH.

ANON NO JOKE THIS IS SUCH A HUGE REASON WHY I INCORPORATED A LANGUAGE BARRIER INTO THE INITIAL IDEA OF THIS AU. You are SO right for this its about everything you said and also the expression of love to learn someone else's language even imperfectly just so you can communicate with them. Im so ill in the brain abt it like oh my GODS i love space aus that really lean into the cultural differences and cultural exchange of it all

Also anon you will LOVE that fact that glossy and i were talking the other day about the concept in your other ask-- we've determined that Scar and Jellie's species (now officially called Tsabii) has a huge thing about colours. Ive been picturing their planet to have a lot of deserts and warmer climates with only a few extreme cold ones, as well as a lot of underground cave systems, so colour is something very important and traditional to their people. We decided Tsabii actually translates roughly to "spectrum/all colours/all spirits" and is basically their own word for people as a collective. And instead of saying something like "you make me incredibly happy" you'd say something along the lines of "you have bright colours"

Scar, at some point down the line, tells Grian almost offhandedly that he's the "most colourful person [he's] ever seen." Which is like. Probably one of the most smitten and romantic things a Tsabii can ever say to someone else. A bit like saying aishiteru in Japanese. It's not something you'd ever say in public because it's practically verbal pda, incredibly intimate, and basically declaring this person the center of your world and happiness. And Scar just. Says it to him. With perfect, calculated casualness.

Of course Grian doesn't understand the connotations of that. He's out here assuming Scar just really likes the colour red. And ohhhh my gods the fun we've been having turning that concept around, its been making me insane

Anyway tldr; anon u are so right for everything and i am solemnly shaking your hand

[p0th]

ik im probably rlly late to the party but what is objectum, like is it a role play thing, is it a coping thing? I need someone to explain it to me like im 5 bc i genuinely just don't understand what it is lol

So the literal definition of being objectum is someone who's attracted to inanimate objects, whether that be platonic, romantic, sexual, or somethin else. However, looking at it with only its literal definition doesn't really account for the intricacies that such a label brings.

I just want to point out that while some people see objects as alive (the label for that being POSIC), others dont. Animism is also a similar term for where people percieve inanimate things as having souls. Personally, I dont see my object as alive, but do sometimes use gendered terms to describe them and feel comforted by their presence. People can also be objectum and be attracted to actual people too.

Being objectum is also more common in autistic people. Object personafication is a common trait seen in autism and other disorders and i can see how that can lead people to being objectum. Though I have never been formally diagnosed with anything, i am probably neurodivergent & maybe that has a part in me identifying as objectum idk!! Theres a study on autism in objectum ppl here if u want to glance over it: https://www.nature.com/articles/s41598-019-56449-0

For me, I started using the objectum label coincidentally around the time I started finally figuring out that i was aroace and not attracted to real people. I realized that the love I feel for my friends is equivalent to the love I feel for my hobbies and interests which was also the same love i felt towards certain objects. I drew this out cuz i think its a lil confusing how im saying it LOL. Theres also a thing called "conceptum" which is the attraction to concepts which I think i actually fall more into, but I just go by objectum because it is more general.

You know how people will swear they have this great relationship with nature? How they feel so so connected to plants and how they love watching the ocean and how they wish they could live outside forever because the forest is a part of their flesh and blood? How they feel more alive feeling the earths fresh air and how nature teaches them things they never even knew about themselves? okay, so, why is this normal to say but once u turn it around into something that’s an object it is insane talk!! I feel like there's this interesting dynamic where its okay to be super attached to nature but kinda weird to be super attached to inanimate things but i think i am rambling & getting off topic!!!

Personally, I dont really have objects that im attracted to in the same way I would be attracted to a human. It is very broad for me. Others though, have certain objects that they really like and thats fine. For me, going by that label just makes me comfortable even if i dont fit into the literal definition. I like computers in general, not just my own personal computer. Objectum for me is just another way to say that my love for inanimate things can be just as great as my love for animate things. Theres just so much complexity and nuance in it that it is hard to describe unless you've experienced it yourself.

As for it being a coping thing, I've heard some people say its a result of not being able to trust people due to past trauma, but i dont believe that's necessarily true for the majority of people and not too good to generalize. Ive grown up surronded by friends and in a loving environment and am able to maintain relationships with living people, but also use the label of objectum because it makes me comfortable.

I can very much see how someone can look at someone saying theyre attracted to objects and just cringe a little bit and thats okay LOL. At this point, I have been exposed to so many concepts -being online so much and surrounded by so many diverse people- that i just dont even pay it mind. But, I know a lot of people have literally never heard of this label before and are just weirded out by it. I think honestly people need to think about the limitless potential a relationship can be when in the hands of such a complex being as a human. At the end of the day though, it doesn't hurt anyone but its also okay to be a lil unsure of it as an outsider. Just be kind to others!!

Im sorry if this is a bit of word vomit, if u cant tell i got a lil too into it & my thoughts tend to be rlly scattered LOL. thank u 4 the ask & plz let me know if u need any clarity on anythin cuz i know i am very hard to follow at times !!!

[funnywormz]

🏳️‍🌈Rimmer...

send me 🏳️‍🌈 and a character for my lgbt headcanon and a doodle

HELL YEAH >:3

my headcanons on rimmer bounce around a little bit but these are the most constant ones/my favs! some elaboration/explanation below

gay: i headcanon rimmer as gay (specifically homoromantic)! he is just gay to me. i cannot imagine him with a woman, and all of his attempts to act straight and manly in canon feel kinda silly like he's trying Too Hard. i could go on a rant abt this topic for hours but ppl in the rd fandom already somewhat know what im talking abt lol. he's at least some flavour of queer no doubt abt it

asexual: ive seen this headcanon around a bit and iirc at least one half of grant naylor has said that rimmer doesn't rlly feel attraction or have much libido and his attempts at sexual pursuits are just him trying to prove something (this also relates to him being gay but yknow)......... this headcanon has grown on me a lot and i like it. personally i feel like it fits him and makes sense for his character yknow. i don't rlly have much to say abt this one lol i just saw someone else with this headcanon one day and was like "oh yeah that checks out. asexuality be upon ye" and that was it. also a character with a nickname/alter ego called "ace" literally being ace is too good of an opportunity to pass up tbh

nonbinary: probably the most niche/unpopular of these headcanons but hear me out. rimmer does a lot of posturing and protesting around his sexuality but he also does the same thing with his gender, always trying to prove himself as a manly man despite that not being who he is, making snide remarks abt ace wearing woman's clothing, the moments when he wears women's clothing himself, the fact that low rimmer is blatantly gnc etc......... also he's been a hologram for most of his life? death? existence? now and the entire human race is extinct. gender and sex and whatever are kinda completely irrelevant to him now. and i think that for rimmer, gender was always more of a cage that he forced himself into rather than something he ever had genuine enthusiasm about. also im nonbinary and i love Projecting and also generally fucking around with characters' genders

(side note: ik ive been using he/him exclusively for rimmer here, and im doing that bc those are his pronouns in canon and what ppl are familiar with, but personally i headcanon his pronouns as he/she/they/xe)

(side side note: im aware that rimmer is far too repressed and confused to ever realise that he is gay much less that xe is ace and nonbinary LOL. these are not things i would expect her to ever fully realise abt himself. but like. in theory. deep down. in an ideal universe. this is how i see him truly being below all the internalised issues etc)

[mothmage]

Body thief Armand !! ?

for a bit of context, this is the first few lines of the word document:

Title: Bacchus, Recumbent

Summary In 1992, Raglan James stole the body of a vampire. In 1982, someone else did it first. Or: A study in gluttony and in deprivation.

Tags: gore, hedonism

this one is still in the "frantically jotting things down with no capitalization or punctuation" phase, which makes it horrible to read snippets of lmao. it's 75% armand eating and having sex and doing drugs and having human-body experiences in a way that's very different from lestat's bodyswap adventure, and the other 25% is just the most soul-crushing grief i've ever written and also gore and my agenda for armand to eat people. the idea for this fic was co-developed in another ask game a while ago, with people in the comments adding things (@molloyboi super heavily co-developed this).

anyways skipping over the horny fun parts and going straight to the armand-style misery, if you want a horribly poor grammar and spelling and no punctuation snippet of armand having an emotional crisis after trying cocaine, see below (tw vomit, blood - not from a fight or anything):

he takes a knife to daniels chest slicing shallowly below his collarbone. daniel hisses but holds armands head as he latches on sucks.

he pulls away when the blood stops flowing and starts to coagulate making a face. he isnt used to that. he drops to his knees then sucks daniel off. when his cock hits the back of his throat and makes him gag, he has to pull off to literally vomit blood and alcohol and bile and chunks of food.

daniel steps back makes a gagging noise then is like oh boss armand baby.

armand coughs wipes his mouth then stares at it swirling down the drain. he starts to cry then and looks up at daniel with snot and tears running down his face. im sorry daniel im so sorry.

hey no come here its all right. come on stand up lets get you cleaned off.

clean, he stands with his head against daniels chest those big familiar hands rubbing up and down his unfamiliar back.

i didnt mean to waste it he mumbles pressing a kiss to the scabby line across his collarbone. im sorry i didnt mean to waste it

to- he laughs presses a kiss to his head. my god armand it’s fine. the human body has a lot of blood as you well know. im fine.

he shakes his head but cant make daniel understand and cant make himself stop crying.

daniel sighs turns off the water. come on boss he says quietly. he leads armand out to their pool to the hot tub that daniel had insisted on.

hes glad now as daniel leads him in. he hisses at the temperature. it’s too hot.

daniel steps in still holding his hand. just go slow give it a minute.

he does and it becomes comfortable. he steps all the way inside and settles beside daniel curled up around him. daniel drags him over to sit on his lap draped across his chest. not like a child but like an octopus. armand loves to sit like this. it feels powerful normally. daniel couldnt move against the strength of his vampire body. he shivers now. hes just a child again a skinny little foolish child like hes always been. all masks removed.

NOW so you arent misled about the true vibes of this fic, here's a bonus bit, less of a snippet and more like notes to break into scenes later:

when he returns he drags daniel to italy, to the monuments. searching for the body thief he tells him. but sightseeing all the while. ive never seen this in the daytime the colosseum or the pantheon. with all the crowds. he delights in it curling his arm around daniel and letting the crowds press them close together. everybody is hot and everybody smells and he drapes himself over daniels back during their picnic lunch to press his nose into the space behind his ear and breathe him in. he smells the same even if armands nose has changed. they take pictures that daniel cant bear to look at but armand tucks away for safekeeping. they go to the finest restaurants in the world and order dish after dish. armand stands naked in the hotel bathroom admiring this new body of his. it’s putting on weight, fleshy around the hips and thighs, the way his own body is. it feels more like him every day. he cuts his hair into a sort of mullet like a rockstar, has daniel hold onto it while fucking him from behind. they go to clubs to bars to shows, pick up men and women in droves. every hotel room hosts an orgy and daniel goes along with it all, whatever armand wants. but what he wants is daniel and daniels body can’t keep up. so he purchases a harness, a silicone cock that straps onto his thigh, and rides it while daniel’s own recovers. daniel falls asleep more than once, w his hands gentle around armands hips and his cock bouncing limp in his lap.

then they go to new york, try coke again at the club and dance until the sun comes up then dance their way through the park laughing and giddy. they fall into the grass daniel groaning and armand laughing.

[daydark4k]

Going on a bit of a rant here about some problems ive noticed about bootwt.

I feel like it's become increasingly exhausting to be in this community, and ill explain why because i have left it behind.

A lot amazing work has been done by the community to make it a safer space for minorities, but in a way this has put the community on a pedestal. It feel like everyone is expected to be an activist or they are a bad person nobody wants around. 

There's a huge difference in being an ally, and an activist. An ally is someone that will speak against shit when they come across it, do their best to educate themself, stand behind people in every way they can.

An activist goes a step further and seeks out ways to make change. Organizing charity events, going out of their way to educate others, uplift voices and being constantly posting about issues as they come out. Taking on the problems of others is not an easy thing mentally especially if you have your own issues.

Are you a bad person for not making a twitter post when some shitty cc says a stupid thing again? Bigotry is constantly happening and will continue, no matter what the community is like. But, if you were to watch the news, get overwhelmed and have to turn it off instead of tweeting about it, you wouldnt be a bad person right? The victim on the news could have their entire life changed by a tramatic event and you cant even have the decency to watch and give your empathy?

There's this overwhelming crushing expectation in this community of being an activist or else you dont belong. If you dont post wishing a happy holiday, happy heritage month, your deep supportfor the people that were discriminated against, then you dont care. People do it like its a checklist. it's not enough to simply care silently. It feels very performative as an outsider. It's always makes me feel so awful for watching ranboo and wanting to be a part of the community. The guilt is horrible. But if im not kept up with all the bad parts of it, im not doing it right.

There is also ableism. If you are uneducated or make a mistake speaking over minorities because of social issues you might experience, even if you try to be better it's held against you forever. These mistakes are valid and wrong. It's very important to have the attitude to improve yourself and see your mistake. As long as you are trying, why do people feel the need to kick you out of your safe space? I am not active on social media but i have seen this happen to many in the community.

I just hope for a space away from the hell i deal with. I just want to see and share silly art.

It's absolutely amazing the efforts of bootwt to make a good place for everyone. People work so hard and im grateful and amazed at what they have done. Racists should be bullied away. Ignorant people who do microaggressions but are willing to be educated and be better should be educated. Jumping people does not help anyone, help people realize their mistakes.

I hope the community continues the amazing work they have been doing. But lessen up on the expectations of others to also be activists like them. Communities are made up of all kinds of people. Everyone wants different things, some people need an escape from constant negativity. We should try to get along, point out each others mistakes and become better. Not put the community on the highest pedestal expecting everyone to be the same.

I hope this doesn’t come across like im a bigot trying to justify myself. I was really scared to post this but if I’m the only one who feels this is a problem just ignore me

i originally wasn't going to respond to this, but i want to break down some of this and explain it because i feel like i know what you're trying to say, but there's a lot of stuff in here that is misconstrued.

"It feel like everyone is expected to be an activist or they are a bad person nobody wants around"

you are not a bad person if you aren't an activist! i hope no one feels obligated to always be on the front lines fighting with people to make change. ranboo's community in the recent months has been one of the most active communities i've been in when it comes to rooting out bad people and making sure they know they're not welcome. if you feel unwelcome, why? you say it's because you don't want to be an activist. you don't have to be! but sending support and love to people who need it isn't activism. being educated and constantly evaluating yourself and your biases isn't activism. that's a part of living in the world we were born into that's entrenched in horrible bigotry that's been taught and ingrained since birth. ignoring these things doesn't make them go away, and the least you can do is acknowledge it and work to not continue the cycle of pain that so many minorities are subjected to. You say the community is supposed to be a safe place. how is it supposed to be safe if there are people who get away with saying and doing horrible things? its not enough to not be racist, ableist, antisemitic, sexist, homo/transphobic etc. you have to be anti- all of these things, and have a genuine love for the people who are affected.

if you feel like these things are too much emotionally for you, you are more than welcome to step away. no one expects anyone to be on the internet 24/7 or to always engage in the negative topics. hell, i've stopped talking about certain ccs and stopped constantly criticizing their actions because i know they wont change. i recognized it isn't healthy for me and there's no point to it. but when it comes to support, to making sure that everyone knows that bigotry isn't welcome, that is a very important aspect of a community. that's the DEFINITION of what a community is! and, if those of us who have followings and have thousands of people who look to us as a reflection of ranboo, don't do these things? how does that look from the outside? at this point it doesn't even correlate to ranboo anymore. me wanting people in bootwt to be educated and respectful people doesn't exist only in the online community, it exists in real life too. i want others to be aware of the impact they have on others. I would think that any fan of ranboo's would want that too, considering its one of the biggest things ranboo advocates for his fans. to be good people.

you correlated being an ally and being an activist, and you said that "An ally is someone that will speak against shit when they come across it, do their best to educate themself, stand behind people in every way they can." is that not what the community has constantly asked for? that's all minorities are asking for. you just described the community! then you say "There's this overwhelming crushing expectation in this community of being an activist or else you dont belong. If you dont post wishing a happy holiday, happy heritage month, your deep support for the people that were discriminated against, then you dont care." isnt that just being an ally, by your definition???? wishing people happy holidays to respect their culture and important days, and standing behind people who have experienced discrimination so they know they are loved and those hurtful things aren't welcome here? if you miss something or are late, that's normal! even if you after the fact say "hey, sorry i missed it but happy x hope your day was well" maybe one person will see it and will feel seen.

"it's not enough to simply care silently." im going to be completely honest. no. no its not. its not enough because being silent ALLOWS bigotry to exist. im going to link this article i researched specifically for this post, because it explains how silent racism works and is ingrained in our society

"It feels very performative as an outsider. It's always makes me feel so awful for watching ranboo and wanting to be a part of the community. The guilt is horrible. But if im not kept up with all the bad parts of it, im not doing it right."

no one expects anyone to always be caught up on which new cc was racist. we want people to be able to recognize bigotry and uplift the people who are hurt. to say, both online and in real life, when its safe: "hey, that wasnt cool, that hurts people." you shouldnt feel bad for wanting to be apart of the community. people are allowed to want to be apart of it. its a fun place to be sometimes! but also, people are allowed to distance themselves and not forgive some of the bad things they experienced.

"There is also ableism. If you are uneducated or make a mistake speaking over minorities because of social issues you might experience, even if you try to be better it's held against you forever. These mistakes are valid and wrong. It's very important to have the attitude to improve yourself and see your mistake. As long as you are trying, why do people feel the need to kick you out of your safe space? I am not active on social media but i have seen this happen to many in the community."

i do agree with you on this one. I don't like how the internet holds grudges. people aren't allowed to change and things they did are always held against them. BUT. on the other hand, if you have hurt people, those victims are not obligated to forgive you. this is a balance that isn't easily achieved in a large community, much less so on the internet. these are things that happen in all communities and its not fair sometimes.

at the end of the day. if you don't want to be an activist, then don't be. if you only want to see art and funny bits, mute terms. the more that these things are discussed and called out however, the easier its going to make it for the future. i don't think its fair to blame hurt people for making you feel bad about yourself. that's something you need to reflect on yourself and recognize why you feel that way, whether it be guilt or ignorance.

im not gonna be responding on this any further, go ham in the comments with thoughts if you want

have a nice day!

[malt-rants-and-stuff]

Hiii malt :3 ask game time… thoughts on shirashiro (shirahama tashiro) GO! And any other shirahama ships you feel strongly about :3

SUNNYYYYYY HIIII okay okay i feel like we all know i have unending thoughts and ideas about shirahama kyouji and his relationships right this is common knowledge now. shirashiro is so... i have feelings about them

in canon context. mmm i love them but i cannot see it but also it does definitely compel me. ive entertained the thought of them before but for me it just comes down to them being more fun to think of as platonic. howeverrr, if they were to be together or at least if they were to like each other? well then there would be thoughts I could have.

like, say you have this friend. and for the purpose of this thought bubble we will say that this friend is named something that starts with a T. so say you have this friend and youve known each other since middle school. you are both close and arent, best friends yet acquaintances, you know what i mean.

say this friend who's name ends in ashiro goes to the same high school as you and you drift apart for a little bit. he has his friends and you're content just existing. but then one day you suddenly find yourself hanging out with them and things spiral. say you find yourself liking his friends, opening up to them in the strange trying-to-be uncommitted way that you do. say your friend invites you to join clubs with him and you are there to watch him amble around through life trying to find a Something for himself. say you watch him and you realize just how well you know him. accidentally of course. you'd never go out of your way to know someone like that who isn't a girl you're trying to date. obviously. but you find yourself recognizing what he's doing and why he does it and you try to help but there arent really words to say about this sort of thing.

say you think about the high school experience, growing and growing and somehow changing in ways you didn't expect. say your friend joins a certain club and you arent too into it but you come along just to see how things are. and while youre there you see your friend, who you have know for a good amount of time, act in a way you haven't really seen before. and you know that to anyone else it wouldn't be too out of the ordinary and to be honest its not that big of a deal but you still find yourself noticing it anyways. and you both want to quit that same club. for the same reasons (for sure, definitely) and you get to quit and leave and he's still there and he stays and it sticks to you.

i was going a lot of places with this but halfway though i went outside and became normal again and also kinda lost my train of thought so forgive me im just gonna explain where i was going with this in a not neurotic way (lies)

so shirahama. that guy. i like to think he would have a crush on tashiro in middle school that you can only have on your best friend. i think he would be seeing everyone around them dating and falling in love and go "i want that. how do i get that?" and then find himself falling for tashiro. i think tashiro has no thoughts about dating shirahama until second year (and give me a moment on that one.) and i think that shirahama forces himself to move on from his crush to "grow up" so to speak in between middle and high school. i think that even then he never lets himself forget about it and it haunts him and he can never get a date because he wants it to keep haunting him. shirashiro join the ping-pong club, two go in one comes out. absolute bloodbath. and in the end shirahama gets what he wanted. his friend is somehow a lot happier in his weird little Club with his weird little Thing that he has with the president ("previous president!" shirahama gives him a look that says the distinction doesn't really matter to him but the look thrown back makes him realize it should) and vice president. and you see now here is where i come back to that part about second year.

because. the thing is. well. tashiro does think about shirahama. maybe not in the same way all the time or as often or as deeply. but he does. he thinks about everything and everyone, really, so it shouldn't really stand out so much but it does. second year comes and relationships bloom (or he thinks they do) and festivals are had and its... fine. and then it just sort of happens. like it jumps into him mind "oh wouldn't that be something." and he acts like it wouldn't be and that he never thinks about it again but he does and its hilarious. a grand old comedy show. shirahama walks out stage left and tashiro has forgotten where he was supposed to stand. it can never happen at the right time and their feelings chase on the tails of one another and its just a fun time. tashiro kind-of-sort-of-not-really gets over it by third year but then oops, what's this, he's grown taller and shirahama cant help but notice the little ways tashiro has changed since way back when and now he's back in the pit. cue laugh track.

and yeah that's kinda how they are in my mind. but now if you want to get into other shirahama ships... well hold on i will continue in another reblog

[lacefuneral]

hi!!! i love for custom blog theme,, do you have a link to the code or creator 0:?

ya!

so my theme is actually a heavily modified version of redux edit #1 by lopezhummel (current url: holyaura). i always remind users that most tumblr themes are old and that you'll need to replace all instances of "http://" in the code with "https://" so tumblr will save the theme. i had to do it with this one

these are the modifications i made to the theme. i edited this theme over the course of at least a year or so and don't quite recall how i did all of these things. but to the best of my ability:

i moved the "left side img" to the right side of the screen. i also made this element "responsive" so the image will never get cropped when you resize your screen. this was a bitch and a half to figure out and i truthfully do not remember how i did it

i deleted the text in the drop-down navigation so it appears as a little line that is otherwise not noticeable. this type of theme, the "redux edit," used to be very popular because having a drop-down menu let you cram a bunch of links that lead to sub-pages on your blog. i've done away with my sub-pages, but i still like the format of the "redux style" tumblr theme, for its minimal UI and for its customization options.

i separated my mobile description from my web description for formatting reasons. basically, most elements in tumblr themes are connected to specific text fields and toggles. i simply went to the section that was connected to my blog description and deleted it. the web description has to be manually typed inside of the CSS/HTML editor when i want to change it. whereas my mobile description is whatever i type in the "description" box of the normal tumblr theme editors.

i added code someone else made ("NoPo" by drannex42 on GitHub) which allows you to hide posts with certain tags on them. i did this to hide my pinned post, as it looks bad on desktop.

i replaced the tiny pagination arrows at the bottom with images that literally say "next" and "back" because the arrows were far too small/illegible. i know they aren't centered in the container i'm not sure how to fix that lol

i added a cursor

i installed a working music box ("music player #3" by glenthemes), and then added music by uploading MP3 files to discord and then using the links of those files as the audio sources. iirc i also had to make this element responsive and i aligned it so it would sit on the left side of my screen. i made the "album art" for each one the same strawberry pixel art

the moth is just a PNG i added and then moved around so it was behind my sidebar using the options that came pre-packaged with the theme

if you want something like the strawberry shortcake decoration at the top (called "banner" in the theme) your best bet is to google "pixel divider"

theme didn't support favicon so i added that in so i could have a little heart

ALSO:

this theme is. really weird about backgrounds. any background that i have ever set for it, i've had to do weird shit in photoshop. like making the background HUGE, mirroring it, etc. - because it would crop the image weird, or there would be a gap where there was no image. idk man, it's haunted. i'm sure there's a way to fix this but i am NOT tech savvy enough. anyway, patterns are probably your best friend. and if you DO want something that isn't a pattern, it's going to take a lot of trial and error. but i love this theme so i deal with it 😭

the sidebar image and the floating image do not scale. if your image is 1000 pixels, it will display at 1000 pixels. you'll either have to edit the code so that the theme scales the image for you, or resize any images before you add them

my white whale of theme editing (aside from the Weird Background thing) is that i cannot get infinite scrolling to work. i have tried every code out there. all of them break my theme. it makes me sad because like. i have music there for a reason. the idea is that people would listen to it while they scroll. unfortunately, the way it's set up now, the music will stop every time someone clicks "next" or "back" 💀

anyway sorry for rambling but i hope you enjoy the the theme and customizing it in the way that you want to!

[silvyslayer42]

ok so (explanations under the cut)

in order of worst to best we have-

F - satosai. get out of my face, satosai.

full disclosure though- i used to really like satosai, but then i grew as a person and part of that is realizing satosai is painful amounts of overrated and mid (im joking obviously, though i do truthfully dislike it, no shade to you if you do. plus i still look at ship content of it sometimes because it’s there in mass amounts and they’re cute sometimes). also some satosai fans are so annoyingggg (you know the ones) and will go after other saiki ships and be like “anyways satosai better” and i do genuinely think you’re annoying and should get off of my page if you do that.

E - kuboyasu x teruhashi. it goes in E tier for “Eh?” because i do not get it

i have nothing to say about them, to the point that it’s not even funny. this is like, a very sober crackship to me. im sure someone who does really like this ship could sell me on it but it hasn’t happened yet. i see this ship around sometimes and just get so confused. i do not see the chemistry

D - kubosai. even more confusing than the last one in some ways but i kind of see the charm of it.

again though, nothing much to say. they work aesthetically, like—the bones of a good ship are here, but there’s no meat to tear into. in their canon/close to canon versions i cannot see it at all (probably because i like other ships with both of them a lot more), but in a good fic or au i do very much indulge in the BAMF x BAMF content. yeah idk what else to say, they’re so low on here because i just do not think about them as a romantic pairing or seek it out. i don’t know why it’s so popular (unless there’s some solo chapter with them as a duo that ive never seen)

C - imuteru, hii x satou, and makoku (with one u). yeah, I know, C tier for “Contreversial Take” i suppose.

OK LET ME EXPLAIN OFFICER-

imuteru used to be higher up on the list, but then terusai took over my body and soul, and i just can’t really see them together anymore. whenever i think of imuteru i think of unrequited imuteru on imu’s end and that makes me sad :( for some reason this same effect didn’t happen with teruchiyo or mikoteru but that might be that those two have other ships with the characters aswell idk

satou x hii would be further up because i do really like them together and i think the whole luck balancing thing is super cute, i just don’t think about them enough to put them higher. yes, your boos are understandable, and your tomato throwing. someday i’ll decide to read a fic about them and it’ll probably become B tier idk

.. ok now you REALLY HAVE TO HEAR ME OUT. makoto x kusuo could be so funny. this is a true crackship, and one laced with the absolutely most fatal drug cocktail you’ve ever seen. in a world where makoto isn’t literally a walking incest joke and is just a protective and pretty idiot it slaps so hard. kokomi would hate it, kuusuke would hate it, his parents would be questioning how kusuo managed to bag a famous actor without mind control. it is utter chaos and so so much better for it. i think they should be more popular and it’s probably my worst saiki k take. still, putting them any higher is basically saiki k fandom sacrilege atp so.

B - nendou x saiko, mikosai (+mikoteru and teruchiyo which weren’t on the tierlist for some reason), kaisai, and yumekai. now we’re getting somewhere. i quite like all of these.

nendou x saiko is just very fun to me. idiot for idiot but it’s in the romcom rich guy who doesn’t know shit meets guy who doesn’t know shit either. silly x tries to be serious but can’t really pull it off. i think they can both mutually make each others lives better + their interactions in canon were great. i wish they were more popular

oh boy mikosai!! oh boy, mikosai… mikosai is the first sight of my polyship i like to call “psychicshipping” which is where i ship all of the PK psychickers together romantically as a weird kind of OT4. i have so much to say on mikosai and a lot of thoughts about them, and i do genuinely like them as a pairing a lot, BUT. it ranks lower than the other psychicships because the fandom put a bad taste in my mouth with it. often, i see a lot of people hating on terusai in favor of mikosai or saying that mikosai is somehow more valid and im like “?”. it often feels like mikosai is the het saiki ship for teruhashi haters, which SUCKS because i do see the vision. like, THIS:

this is great, yk? they look good together and the dynamic is great, but the way the fandom treats and characterizes them is not even close to how they should be, at least to me it’s not. this image sums up my feelings on them pretty well:

closing thoughts: i should be the only one allowed to ship mikosai because only i understand them NEXT

mikoteru + teruchiyo bonus round because i like them too and they deserve to be here: these ships are both great in my professional opinion, but their paragraphs get combined because i don’t have a lot of vested interest in them specifically despite really liking them. I think teruhashi’s problems could all be fixed if she had at least one girlfriend (preferably more) and that is my only thoughts really. i get very happy when i see people making ship content for either of these, please make more yuri content with teruhashi now thank you !!

kaisai!! this was the first saiki k ship i read a fic for and the first ship i enjoyed. it’s very nostalgic to me because of that. to me they give “greasy gamer who could be blown over by a ghost of wind boyfriend who likes getting himself into trouble x stoic but secretly sweet boyfriend who subtly protects him” which is a rare and overlooked dynamic i think, and something you can’t really get from kubokai. kubokai might still be better but that doesn’t mean kaidou doesn’t have two hands now does it? closing thoughts: i think they’re very cute and need more people to see that, romantically or platonically.

yumekai. i think they should’ve been canon in the end idc idc. i might like other ships with these two more but that does not mean i won’t acknowledge how much i like them. they are honestly one of the best het ships in the entire fandom and need more recognition!! they can be angsty mutual pinning. they can be toothrottingly fluffy. they can be so infuriatingly stupid (they are always stupid but shush). they can be the incarnation of young love. they can and should grow old together. the only reason they aren’t higher up is because, like i said before, i like other ships with either of them so much already so there’s not enough room in my heart for them 😞

A - mikosuka (plus aikechi and torikechi bonus rounds that will both be getting their own paragraphs this time), saikechi, torisai, kubokai, and nendou x hairo. OH YEAH BABYY! all of these are solid and the fandom hasn’t ruined them, in fact all of the stuff ive seen of them slaps. 10/10

mikosuka. please be more popular aaa!! the only reason it’s not is because of how much toritsuka got done dirty in canon for the “pervert character” trope- and how much the fandom just despises him. they’re hilarious in a “married couple who do nothing but fight all the time but everyone can tell they love each other anyways” way to me, not to mention how they’re also a part of psychicshipping. i do think they work better as part of a polycule with saiki to center them, but i saw a post about how aiura could’ve been mistaken and toritsuka might’ve actually been hinted as her soulmate and it’s been a majority of my thoughts since. i think they should get married after a long journey of selfdiscovery for them both where at the end of it they decide they both like life better with each other. i think they should stay in a “will they won’t they” like idiot love interests in a bad but popular tv show forever. i live laugh love mikosuka. i think they both deserve better (mostly aiura but toritsuka too in some ways). closing thoughts: brain running wild all the time 24/7 for these guys forever and ever.

aikechi. i hadn’t really thought about them before making contact with @/no-psi-nan’s posts about them but now my eyes are OPENED!! honestly before that i just saw them in the polypsychiccule as connected via their mutual love for saiki but not with each other directly, but now they are so much more than that to me. he’s the right amount of calm to nicely contrast her passionate fire in a way that the other two just aren’t. they are the pinacle of competent 4 competent while still being idiots in their own ways. aiura shows a picture of him to someone and says “this is my loser pissboy husband. i love him so much”

torikechi. i started liking them in a similar way that i started liking aikechi but the vibes with them are so very different than aikechi. compared to toritsuka, akechi is the cool one and that is crazy 2 me. really really dumb x only a little bit dumb but extremely unhinged in other ways. akechi can finally talk at someone who and be halfway listened to without annoying the other person because of toritsuka being used to ghosts randomly appearing to talk to him all the time and he is ecstatic. toritsuka is just happy to be here and also very confused tbh.

saikechi. what’s there not to like about saikechi tbh. a lot of canon backing and the childhood friends trope? peak. the potential that this ship has for angst and hurt/comfort is sososo good gahhh!! akechi being torn up about saiki leaving and saiki feeling guilty. saiki thinking that he’s done something horrible and not expecting forgiveness, but receiving it anyway :((( aaaaa!!! “you really shouldn’t forgive me. you should hate me” x “i already forgave you, and how could i ever hate you when i love you so much?”. like??? hello??? they make me cry. they make me so happy. they can help each other heal and become better. they could even make each other worse if you play your cards right (you’d be evil for it tho). closing thoughts: screaming crying shaking sobbing throwing up clawing the ground and punching my pillow because of how much i care about them

torisai. they are so funny lmao. also they complete the psychicshipping love square

(^the psychicshipping love square. pink line between names means those two characters are dating, in love, married, etc.) so ofc i love them. as mentioned, i think they’re very funny (a common trait of a lot of the ships i like) and i think saiki could fix him (/j). not much to say since they are my head empty ship but yeah i like me some torisai

kubokai. do i even need to explain?? like torisai there’s not much i really feel i need to say about them but like. who doesn’t like kubokai? these two could not go an episode without doing something gay and we love them for that. not to mention the piles upon piles of content for them. closing thoughts: ofc i like kubokai, who doesn’t like kubokai?

nendou x hairo. HELL YEAH BABYY!! <- my reaction when i see a post about them. underrated as hell, just like how these two are as characters. they’re my sillies. the silliest gay couple ever. aso shuichi agrees trust me. also that chapter where they got mistaken for a couple was so fucking funny. it’s a shame like no one knows about it since it’s basically softcore in some parts so it didn’t get animated

S - terusai and aichiyo. MY FAVS! i eat breathe and live on this. i have a current pintrest board of these ships because i love them so much.

aichiyo. give me more aichiyo content, NOW. aichiyo is seriously my favorite aiura ship, and i look it up on this godforsaken website, and you know what i find? LIKE THREE POSTS. THREE. THATS BASICALLY NOTHINGGG. and there’s not really a lot of fics ive found about them either (if you have recommendations i want them. please). that episode where they interacted was so gay it outshined nearly everything else. like- they’re so in love!! *shakes you* listen to me damnit!! they love each other!! they’re just so adorable i don’t know what you want me to say. look at them LOOK AT THEMMMM

(^made by @/wowneh_toon on twitter) closing thoughts: they make me feral

terusai (ending with this one instead of going in order because they are my number one favs out of any saiki k ship to have ever been concocted). AAAAAHH!!!!!! I LOVE THESE TWO SO MUCHH!!!! terusai is the kind of ship that grows on you the longer you’re a fan of the show, and now it’s my straight up comfort ship. anyone who disagrees is WRONG this whole fandom is WRONG and im not afraid to say that. if you don’t like them at least queerplatonically i think your takes are immature and stupid and im blocking you. terusai is perfect for a fluffy future au where teruhashi is the breadwinner and saiki is her housewife. infinity/10 best romance ever written no complaints. there’s so many terusai moments and chapters (remember when teruhashi was about to confess to him as kuriko and he was blushing???like??? how could anyone see that shit and still think he genuinely hates her… i know i sound so mean here but idc im so so tired of this fandom and the absolute DISRESPECT terusai goes through on a daily basis) thank you aso shuichi for gifting the world with teruhashi and terusai. closing thoughts: i love them and if you don’t i do NOT want to hear about it. id fight the whole fandom over them if i had to im not kidding.

phew that was a lot of writing. i hope you enjoyed my ramblings because all of these came from deep within my heart. also my opinions are all cosmic truths so if you disagree then i guess we’ll just have to both live with you being wrong 🤷

[askanonbinary]

Hi, so I think I might be non binary, but im really confused. When I was younger, I sort of had this image for myself, I wanted to be a woman, with a man, and have kids, but now that I think about it, it never really felt right, I think I just wanted to fit in with society, I didn't really like anyone and barely even knew what gender was back then, and didn't know being queer was a thing. I mean i still dont properly tbh. Also what the heck even is gender, because, I mean, I don't feel right being a girl or a guy, and I know i feel more comfortable being a girl (I am afab) but at the same time being a girl doesn't feel right either. Like almost I prefer presenting as more stereotypically masculine but I prefer more feminine terms, like pretty etc, but my gender feels neutral. Is that valid? I mean i still prefer to be more girlish, so am i just faking it? Or maybe i dont prefer to be considered as a girl but ive just always been seen as one and i live in a cis and heteronormative society, and im only trying to be female so i fit in? I mean, i don't even know why I feel more gender neutral, considering I don't really even understand what classifies you as a certain gender. Also i don't like guys I don't think, I think I just used to think I liked them because I identify with them more, but then my first 'girl crush' turns out to be genderfluid/non binary, but I still like them, so how does that actually work. Like I don't really get how some genders don't feel attractive to me but others do? How do I not like men but like basically anyone else? And how do I even go about being queer, or figuring stuff out, or just maybe even acting more comfortably with my gender, im so confused? Im sorry if that sounds weird, I'm only recently discovering I'm queer, and don't really know how to go about it, plus my family aren't very understanding and I dont have many queer people around me that I can ask for advice, all the other queer people I know are only starting to figure it out too, I have no idea what or who I am yet, is that valid?

; well firstly I'd like to say you're going to feel confused for a while, because this is a new and confusing process. Often when someone grows up in a world with desires and expecations set by others ( get married, have kids, etc like you mentioned ) plus the additional how you should be / act ( be cis, be straight, etc, ), it's really confusing to then realize you don't fit into these very restricting boxes. And so genuinely, don't feel bad for being confused and for being complicated. Those are probably the most " normal " ( as in, common ) things you could be really. Difference is the most common thing there is, so don't stress that you don't fit into one or two neat little boxes ! No one really does do they

; secondly, how you feel about your gender vs how you like being referred to & expressing yourself are all three separate things, sometimes they're similar sometimes not. But if you feel neutral, but prefer feminine terms while also wish to present masculinely, then that's okay ! You're okay to be that and to feel that, totally okay. ( also side note: what " classifies " you as a certain gender is whether or not you want to be classified as that gender, simply speaking. You want to be nonbianry ? You're nonbinary. Want to be a girl ? You're a girl. Want to be a mix of both or three or four ? Then you're that ! And everyone is going to be nonbinary, etc, a little differently. There's similarities and common experiences but it's your identity, so it's going to be specific to you !! )

; thirdly, when realizing you're nonbinary ( and / or when beginning to question your gender at all ) often orientation comes after, and vice versa. ( I know that the moment I found out liking people other than men was an option, I wondered if being a man was an option too and then it simply took off from there and now I'm where I am today: just as confused as I was before much more confident that even if I don't always have the right label, I'm comfortable being me in whatever phase " me " is that day or even that minute, and if that changes then it changes ! ) So if you right now don't feel attraction to men, you don't feel attraction to men ! And I get it, knowing " why " or " how " you like one gender but not the other is confusing, especially with how diverse gender is in the first place. But just, trust that you know what you want, and stick to that while navigating all these terms and experiences !! You'll get through the initial panic, don't worry.

; and fourthly, it's not weird or anything: this is literally the place to ask questions about these sorts of things, and if anyone is going to understand your experiences even just a little it's going to be the people who went through / are going through them too. So no worries about that !! And if the people you're asking questions from answer back with a question themselves, you can find the answers together.

; and lastly: you're valid, your identity is so valid and it has been forever. No matter how confusing or complicated or different it is, it's valid. Even if you never 100% find a label / labels that describe you fully, you're still valid ! And your identity sure as heck is real, I mean it's your identity and it's right there. Seems real and valid enough to me no ?

; good luck figuring out your identity and everything else, and I wish you luck on being confused !! :]

- Mod Xela

[izuom]

favorite kpop group(s) tag game!

tagged by : @writingmochi thank you for the tag lissie!! (and ofc for always having me included in these!)

sorry i cuss a lot

who is your favourite kpop group?

oh boy.. i hope i’m able to answer this without having to list down more than 10+ groups all at once (i’m being serious) but if having favs that you’re constantly updated to then : bts, txt, le sserafim, enhypen, nct dream, riize & aespa!

which member sparked your interest first?

i’m having the toughest time now but here we go

bts : JUNGKOOK! who else other than our used one of the main rappers (WE LOST TO RAPPER JUNGKOOK BEFORE 2015 AND IM STILL BITTER but out of honesty that sadnesses washed away the moment when he decided to birth outro : love is not over and let’s just say i’ve never been fine since then) bro has been an all-rounder since day one and to that he was the one that made me to discover bts (touché)

txt : yeonjun (duh) i was once a bts popper so the moment we were getting a new boy group under bh i just knew i had to check them out. i mean yeonjun is literally every moa’s first love so it’s almost understandable for him to be the first member for you to be interested to LOL

le sserafim : huh to the yunjin (are we serious? that woman slayed on her first day job) it’s mesmerising to see that source music *blood coughing* decided to give us a closure…………… but miss it girl yunjin, duh she’s a starstruck i know it’s getting out of the phrase but i’ll always be grateful that she becomes an idol. the world (read kpop) wouldn’t be the same without her existence. 

enhypen : SUNGHOON!!!!! ON AN ICE RINK!!!! SKATING!!!!! LIKE ???? IVE NEVER SEEN AN IDOL WHO WERE AN ICE SKATER BEFORE LIKE ??? THATS THE MOST PUREST BEAUTIFUL FORM SOMEONE COULDVE BE???

nct dream : mark! bc he was one of the members that were introduced first as part of the nct u sub-unit. i first watched him performing the 7th sense debut performance on music bank and was surprised to see him in the other remaining sub-unit under sm (but then i figured it out that nct IS a group that consists few sub-unit) (i was confused, still am)

riize : wonbin. any attractive man with long hair never not makes me HOOKED on a first sight. he’s majestic. AS HELL. he plays the guitar very well too?? 

aespa : karina!! also i think this was everyone’s normal occurrences of having karina as the first member that sparked your interest in aespa bc same. i only know her first in aespa like she’s mentioned in every fic or edit or on stan twt like… she’s everywhere it’s crazy. (the power she holds)

who was your first bias?

INTERESTING

bts : hoseok. man do we need to replay my first love? HE WAS THE MAN OF MY LIFE.

txt : soobin,, ARE WE SURPRISE AGAIN 

le sserafim : chaewon! i think the answer is there.

enhypen : sunghoon (forever will) 

nct dream : jisung. bro when i say that i used to have a serious crush on him? 2018 zu was a jisung’s whipped era.

riize : sungchan! 90s love was a life experience. (man decided to just make a cameo and slay as fuck) i know we are suppose to talk about sungchan in riize but he’s my first bias in riize ONLY because i knew him first alongside with shotaro (sungtaro slay) 

aespa : KIM MINJEONG. YOU CANNOT TALK TO ME ON HER. SHE WAS MY FIRST LOVE??? 

who is your current bias?

basically just the same except for bts & nct dream :D

bts : yoongi (i am a joke)

txt : soobin (salute for being this loyal)

le sserafim : chaewon

enhypen : sunghoon

nct dream : renjun (....... surprise surprise)

riize : sungchan (eventho i highly think this won’t last long….fuck)

aespa : ningning

what makes them your current bias?

bts : I KNOW CRAZY. i’ve been there for hobi since 2014 esp around those times when no one was there to appreciate him truly as one of the members (DARK TIMES FOR ME, we do not talk about that) but then 2017 yoongi came in. it’s just something about yoongi himself that soothes my soul in peace. the way he thought of things in his own perspective without disrespecting anybody and the way he’s just a full walking comfort a person could be for anyone, for me particularly. his godly, incredible amount of times he’d shown off his talent in rap, producing and things he’d done. i can talk about yoongi that people wouldn't be able to understand bc he’s so ?? what a person is supposed to be. is there anything to prove why i decided to change a bias? 

txt : when soobin was introduced as the second member of txt (gurl) when i told you that soobin introduction film was… a first love at sight moment, it was true. soobin has been the love of my fucking life since then. actually no there’s so many things that i love about soobin. so many things, it’s unexplainable. i can confidently say that his voice caught me off-guard on a first listen. i know it’s dramatic as hell (ANYTHING I SAY ABOUT MY BIASES ARE SO QUESTIONABLE BUT I AM BEING SERIOUS) he has the rarest vocal on his falsetto? he’s doing it effortlessly too? if that’s not enough to actually prove my point of him being my bias then idk what is. man is majestic as hell too. (BONUS POINT!)

le sserafim : AAAAHHHHHHHHHHH god chaewon… honestly, i wasn’t a wiz*one bc produce 48 was shitty as hell. (I WATCHED EVERY MNET SURVIVAL SHOW EXCEPT FOR THIS) neither do i like the final debut lineup for iz*one. i just couldn’t pinpoint what was missing but that’s not the point of that rn. well. for me, i think the majority of people would have agreed with me about this but chaewon is better off with le sserafim. (AUDIENCE GASP) i COULD NEVER say that she caught my attention even the tiniest bit when she was in iz*one, but she did ON A FIRST SIGHT OF HER DEBUT IN LE SSERAFIM. the way that she kept on improving and i didn’t even know that she can dance so well???? (this woman is literally everyone’s type and it’s FUCKING understandable) i watched their documentary too and i love her even much more than i should’ve? i think having chaewon as my bias, it’s emotional. i am emotionally attached to her and i don’t want to seek therapy. 

enhypen : *internally crying, hysterically screaming* are we ready to hear the part of me losing almost entirely of my sanity? i was away from home for the first time for my college, and never really bothered to get updated with my kpop life. those days were.. hectic (as everyone did) but long short story i was on tiktok, at my room, at home since for so long, AFTER my hectic first sem and i just so happened to stumble upon a sunghoon edit on an ice rink, skating WITH THE TIMOTHEE TREND SONG (2020 WAS 4 YEARS AGO TOO?? GOD) AND IM LIKE ??? WHO IS THIS? I NEED TO KNOW WHO IS HE. yk i haven’t watched iland yet at that time (and probably shouldn’t so that i wouldn’t have to endure the trauma that show gave me), and only decided to watch it bc of him. I JUST LOVE LOVE skater park sunghoon a lot more than myself (that should be considered as normal btw) and i never regretted checking out on iland bc if i don’t i wouldn’t have known just how unique his talent is? you can ACTUALLY tell he has the most unique way of dancing, as if he’s dancing with every bit of his skating method and combining it to his dancing style and it’s just ?? beautiful… god park sunghoon i love him a lot.

nct dream : crying as i type this, i love renjun a lot. man is so demonically pure. i haven’t been on nct shit for SO LONG until last year (only applicable for nct dream) and i am attached as shit as they wanted me to be. i think re-stanning nct dream (i will say this forever if i’ve to prove how much they mean to me) was the peak of the third quarter of my life last year. but as for renjun, he’s just so easy to love? for me, his own persona to things as a person always never makes me so deeply attached. (like the fucking loser i am) renjun have a lot of things you can say a lot of things to, like his vocals? (ik you can confidently say that sm has the most vocals out of that shitty company) but i LOVE to listen to his voice. he’s singing with his emotions and my soul thaws in silence every time. HES ALSO SO ROMANTIC LIKE??? MAN CASUALLY JUST ASKED HIS TEAMMATES TO HAVE A MATCHING FRIENDSHIP RINGS LIKE? 

riize : as for sungchan, i think i'm still learning about him. I know i’ve seen him a few times (more than 10 times on screen as for the appearance of the inkigayo and being part of nct) but i still have a lot of things to learn before i can list things down. (gurl you’re in love with another member)

aespa : i love everything about ning yizhuo. i honestly have no idea how i changed my bias but i could never say no to people who can sing well. her vocals?? i can listen to her singing on a daily basis. shes a stunner, a mother=my type. well, her whole existence stands out the most when i first discovered aespa. i just love ningning, she’s so loveable, i love her except for she idolized that one problematic rat. 

who is your bias wrecker

bts : i love them all equally. (jungkook)

txt : taehyun. stfu 

le sserafim : kazuha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i love my woman a ballerina 

enhypen : jungwon. 

nct dream : zhong chenle (hes so attractive???????????)

riize : eunseok 

aespa : minjeong……………………

which member are you currently obsessing that aren’t your bias/bias wrecker

bts : i’ll skip them (they be on military, i’ve no one to be obsessed to recently)

txt : beomgyu. (DAEGU MEN STAY AWAY FROM ME)

le sserafim : YUNJIN. she needs to stop 

enhypen : heeseung. i think i’ve problems with the 01 liner. 

nct dream : none i guess. (i'm still obsess with renjun)

riize : ….. sohee. i think out of the groups, sohee has the most valid reasons and i'm fully to blame for this. i watched the lee hyori’s red carpet to their sampled track of love 119 (THEIR BEST SONG YET WHAT THE FUCK) which is none other than the infamous emergency room ost AND WHEN I TELL YOU IVE BEEN OBSESSED SINCE. and that obsession didn’t stop there, i decided to check more to his vocals compilation and i stumbled upon his predebut covers… WORSE: his sofa cover has been playing on my mind all day since i first heard of it, it’s unhealthy. i’m gonna k word myself 

aespa : none too. 

when did you first discover the group?

bts : 2014. boy in luv was a superior era. 

txt : 2019…. that guessing the morse code at the end of introduction films of every member's era? good old days

le sserafim : on their debut

enhypen : end month of september 2020! (funfact : enhypen was formed on my birthday) 

nct dream : on their debut (them hoverboard era)

riize : on their debut days

aespa : early year 2022 (embarassing as fuck)

have you ever been to one of their concerts?

bts : gurl, no. they did a tour for the red bullet on june 2015? THAT ONE TIME ONLY. what did you expect from me? to go? i was 13. 

txt : they don’t even know my country exists? so no. 

le sserafim : no. (hybe better put malaysia when they do tour one day or else im burning down the whole building as it should’ve)

enhypen : no. (they skipped us.) 

nct dream : they did a tour last year in may…… but miss girl decided to only stan them back in june and was obsessed and mentally ill for not attending. (ONLY BC I AM NOT A FAN) i was late to the party, im sorry and now they be skipping us. 

riize : no. 

aespa : ???????? NO

what are some of your favourite songs by this group? 

i’ll list 10 songs!

bts : butterfly / dimple / coffee / love is not over (full length version) / epilogue : young forever / pied piper / outro : do you think it makes sense? / the truth untold ft steve aoki / spring day / hold me tight 

txt : 20cm / dear sputnik / 0X1=lovesong (i know i love you) ft seori / maze in the mirror / ghosting / skipping stones / fairy of shampoo / blue orangeade / farewell, neverland / eternally 

le sserafim : impurities / easy / perfect night / no celestial / antifragile / smart / blue flame / swan song / good parts (when the quality is bad but i am) / sour grapes

enhypen : just a little bit / criminal love / mixed up / chaconne / not for sale / blockbuster ft yeonjun of tomorrow x together / shout out / blind / given-taken / bills

nct dream : dive into you / teddy bear / 7 days / boom / my youth / better than gold / dunk shot / arcade / poison / love again

riize : …. i’ll list from most to least fav (I LOVE ALL OF THEIR SONGS) love 119 / talk saxy / get a guitar / memories  

aespa : lucid dream / dreams come true / drama / thirsty / next level / life’s too short / don’t blink / i’m unhappy / illusion / better things 

tagging : @my313 (no pressure bestie!) / anyone who want

[basiltonpitch]

I neeedddddd to know your predictions based off the trailer (of Benvi in particular, I really do care about other things in the show but I love them the most)

ooooh okay so.....not all of these predictions are actually serious some of them i just think would be FUN but i dont think they'll actually implement lmao. also....as usual i dont know when to shut the fuck up and stop typing SO. predictions under the cut!!

my prediction for benvi is: devi ghosts ben post-boinkening (basically confirmed; the trailer insinuates that they havent spoken since); ben goes after margot because she likes him (and we all saw how well it went the last time ben started dating someone else bc devi wasn't an option), it implodes, devi retaliates by dating ethan because he's hot or whatever the fuck (and honestly good for her im sure he's a tool but like.....rebound arm candy isnt necessarily a bad thing.....except in this case it is bc that is Also going to implode.) i think it would be HILARIOUS if margot and ethan ended up going out lmfao but. i doubt it. after both their rebounds fail (ben's i want to say around episode 2 bc i dont think they'll drag it out super long, and devi's probably episode 5?) they're still.....skirting around each other, in a will they/won't they kind of situation. i can see fab & eleanor trying to talk some sense into devi but devi just not listening bc she's stubborn as hell and of course she knows there's something there with ben but they've done this back-and-forth dance for so long that she's still nervous about taking that full leap.

and well. then she ends up getting like...accosted in new york (which im guessing the trailer may have been a bit misleading about that exact scenario because, ya know, it's a trailer) and ben tries to play knight in shining armor and well. we all saw what happened lmfao. cue devi icing ben's face n devi being like "why did you do that?" and ben just says "for you" or smthn cheesy as hell. this is probs around like? episode 7 i'd like to think? and they probably at least partially get their shit together but like. lbr it's ben and devi. so it can't be 100% smooth sailing. like you said im excpecing a tatbilb sort of thing - they agree to date & then break up before going to college. (we all know devi gets denied for early decision from princeton - this could play into her actually going to a school in new york - something prestigious, ofc, she graduates as valedictorian).

based on the trailer....im honestly torn on whether ben goes to prom or not! i know you said smthn about him perhaps going home and changing, but part of me also thinks - what if he didnt go at all? what if he stays home, because he knows this is gonna be one of his last good memories with devi and he just cant do it? i know we havent seen a lot of bts for season 4, but we have seen bts of maitreyi + lee + ramona in their prom dresses, and i dont recall jaren being there at all or wearing a suit (the only suit bts ive seen is of him in 2x10). so......maybe he doesnt go, but he comes to her after. idk exactly how that will play out but thats what im hoping for!!!

and of course, they end up going to the same school - thats been something ive been sure of since, well, forever lmao. i'm 100000% convinced that the last shot of the show is going to be devi coming up to ben in the library of their college or vice versa and if im wrong i will eat my mf words

as for other predictions....

i'm with you on thinking it might not be kamala's wedding anymore, but i'm still not sure who's wedding it would be - perhaps another family member? a family friend? who knows.

i think treleanor is going to break up, which is TRAGIC because they r everything to me <3 but i feel like they're the kind of couple to come back to each other after years apart so im holding out hope for them 🤞 in treleanor we trust u know !!!!

paxton's.....there. idk. he's there. devi probably like. goes after him or whatever in the midst of the ben/margot/ethan bullshit bc she doesnt want to be alone and shes like oh i finally like myself maybe i can have this since i can't have what i really want but ya know power dynamics due to him being sherman oaks staff or whatever so. im HOPING as the party with the upper hand in that scenario he turns her down or whatever. maybe she even waits until after this to go after ethan - make both ben and paxton jealous, kill two birds with one stone

i have no idea what else im hoping for and this is straight up a Wall of text aksjdss;d im SO SORRY u know how i get !!!!!