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#also i’m so sorry i feel like i keep ranting here lol. i’ll be less insufferable from now on sorryyyyy
sandsucks · 6 months
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when i get proper sleep….i will be a changed man i promise
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halsteadlover · 5 months
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Just a little rant here about my personal life so feel free to skip lol
I know nobody is gonna read this and I’ll probably delete this when I’ll come to my senses but right now I feel so depressed I just need to get this out of my chest. I always felt tumblr like a safe space so here I am.
I don’t know if you remember the times where I took some time off because of anxiety and my mental health.
Lately it feels like it’s getting worse and I really don’t know what to do, I don’t know if many of you will relate (I really hope not) but it’s just like I don’t know how to be happy and I really hate it here man. I’m so tired of feeling like this, always worrying and having anxiety about something I don’t even know about. I feel so crazy sometimes you know? Like there’s nothing wrong with me, I’m honestly so grateful for the things god gave me. I’m healthy, I have a loving family (even if sometimes they’re overbearing to the point of crazy), I get to study for my dream job, I have a bf that puts up with my ass, friends even if few of them, there’s nothing wrong there are so many worse things people go through and I don’t even have to right to rant about any of this. So why do I feel like I don’t deserve any of this?
I have such deep trust issues it’s ruining my life and relationships, I don’t know why. I hate myself and I sometimes think I don’t deserve to be loved, I’m not that speciale and I’m so damn insecure that every good thing that happens in my life I can’t help but think it’s gonna fade in a minute, that something bad might happen, that I’m so easily replaceable.
Sometimes I truly think that if I disappeared no one would notice or miss me, I thought about doing it but I’m so damn scared. I don’t know where this is coming from, maybe the bullying had something with it I don’t honestly know but I’m so tired of feeling like this.
Why can’t I just love me? Why can’t I enjoy a single good thing that happens to me? Why do I keep sabotage myself by thinking I don’t deserve any happiness and it’ll soon fade away?
For example, these last two days I took three different exams and even though I’m relieved I can’t help but think I’m such a failure, that my parents are so disappointed in me for taking so long to finish a degree I was supposed to finish years ago.
I had an anxiety attack yesterday morning while I was with my bf and I sobbed for hours while he held me but if you ask me what triggered it I wouldn’t know how to answer you.
Why am I like this? Why am I not normal?
It’s just a bit of everything and I honestly don’t know what to do.
But please don’t judge me. I’m aware these “problems” are nowhere serious like some others and I’m so sorry for being so dramatic it’s just… I don’t know guys, I just want to be happy, to feel loved without actually thinking about the worst.
Am I soo pretentious? Do I sound so ungrateful? Complaining about these things when I have everything some people unfortunately dream of? I don’t want to sound like that and I feel so guilty about having these thoughts.
I know you’ll think I’m an attention seeker, fishing for compliments or things like that, I’ve been told that before here and I’m so sorry if it seems that way but trust me it’s the opposite of that. I’m telling this here because I guess it’s easier behind the screen, when no one knows you and can really judge you, but I also thing you’ll judge me anyway but at least it was good for me to let this out.
If someone reads this I hope you won’t think of me any less, and if you’re feeling something like this too I’m so sorry and if you want to talk my inbox and DMs are ALWAYS open for you guys, I’m here even if it takes me some time to answer.
Sorry if something doesn’t make any sense, I didn’t even read this back I’m just cried my eyes out while writing this post and now I have a headache. At least I hope the sleeping will be good lmao.
But tomorrow will be better, I’m sure of this.
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YALL I found my old diary from when I was 13 and I was NOT prepared for how much it swings between “pretentious wannabe Romantic poet” and “cripplingly self-aware middle schooler”
So right away this is hardcore. Comes with a warning that my ghost will haunt whoever reads it after my death.
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“The account of Ocean Waves [for some reason, I was convinced I would be published under that name lol] ^ otherwise known by a less appealing name, is enclosed. Please do not read until you are sure my name is carved into a headstone. If I am killed for the sole purpose of reading this, however far-fetched that may seem, I will hunt you down.”
Happy reading,
- Ocean.
P.S.- You can, however, read this with permission. Good luck with that. Also, if you do decide to kill me, I would prefer a peaceful death. And by the way, I would prefer even more if you didn’t try to kill me. Oh, and if this is read while I’m still alive, I will still hunt you down.”
Already, you can see the makings of a future historian in the works.
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“In this somewhat girly journal [it was Disney Princess themed] is the somewhat boring account of a 13-year-old girl. I, Sophia [last name], also known as Ocean Waves, am recording things in here in hopes of future discovery. As I will not share this to [sic] the outside world, I hope this journal will be preserved so that future civilization may find out about my time. However, as a writer and an artist, my goal is to be noticed, not especially famous.”
I give some hilarious takes here:
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“I also have artist’s block. I tried drawing a picture earlier; but I didn’t feel like finishing it. I wonder if I’ll ever draw with a passion again.”
(No, younger me, you were just undiagnosed with ADHD.)
Notably, I don’t think I was the Medieval history expert I thought I was at the time:
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“I don’t wish to have a boyfriend, and at 13, I don’t think I’m ready to. In the dark ages, girls my age would have already been grandmothers. I think that’s revolting.”
I get very pretentious about my English classes, although I have to say, I still agree with my criticisms of the school system.
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“This is my own personal thought, and I prefer it not to be read, as I think differently at night. I think the school system does not have a very good idea of what language arts should be like. We spend hours picking apart and dissecting poems, like they are carcasses and we vultures. Poems aren’t made to be dissected, they’re made to be felt. And all we write are expository essays. Of course this is important, but there’s no way to express how we feel. After all, who decided to put “art” in “language arts” when there is no art to it at all; just mindless examining? I’m sorry for my rant [not sure why I keep apologizing to my private diary], but that’s what journals are for. Until tomorrow,
- Ocean”
I also write about my own art with self-loathing that would put a sexually-repressed 17th century Puritan to shame. You can see me dot my “i” with circles now because I saw a Buzzfeed video once that said people who do that are creative. And I get very passionate about Edgar Allan Poe for some reason:
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“I experimented with my new copic markers today, and everyone who saw my drawings seemed to like them. I’m disgraced to say that I had a sense of overwhelming pride, but I’m not used to people noticing my art too often. In first period (aka so called “Language Arts”), we read “The Raven” by Edgar Allan Poe. Most people in the class didn’t seem to appreciate it, but I did. It tore open the hearts of both the reader + the main character, exposing his grief + longing towards Lenore, who [sic] he can never see again, so much that the stoic raven drives him to insanity and later, death. And to think that Poe got barely any recognition in his time! I’m not expecting much publicity from my books, but I do hope I’ll be able to write gripping + chilling stories like Poe did, without his own troubles (…)”
… In summary, I think 13 year old me would be very happy to know that in the years since, I majored in English, still draw, still single, and own a Poe anthology I bought while visiting the museum dedicated to him in Virginia.
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haeresyys · 2 years
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Gonna just rattle off some of my general Dottore thoughts + headcanons here
THIS IS KINDA LONG LMAO I’M SO SORRY IN ADVANCE ENJOY MY FUCKIN... MADDENED RAMBLINGS IG??? This bitch has been living rent free in my fucking head for months now and I don’t know how to evict him
We haven't gotten confirmation either way on how the Segments work I don't think, so I'm headcanoning them as at least partially organic until further notice jgksdjgk
Also I know we got that shot of that weird THING where Dottore's eyes should be when his model got posted, but you can pry red-eyed Dottore from my cold dead hands !!!!
(I personally think they just fucking slapped some textures under there because we're not supposed to see what his eyes look like yet. Think Kaeya's eye under the patch)
The way I draw him, he does have scars around his eyes underneath his mask, though I've probably tweaked how they look about half a dozen times by now. I'll post him later probably
My idea with that oneshot I wrote is that, despite his best efforts not to, Dottore is still capable of feeling emotions. Beyond basic things such as anger though he is... Not very well in touch with them. He insists he doesn't feel guilt in disposing of the other Segments. (If anything he almost sounded happy abt it while talking to Nahida bc it sounds like they never shut the fuck up lmfao) It only starts to sink in that maybe he does have some regrets when he starts having those nightmares.
He had countless pairs of eyes to give himself different views of the world, and now he only has himself. But he keeps pushing onward and shoving it back down, because to accomplish his goals, no length is too far. Dottore is completely and utterly ruthless, I think we all know this by now.
That also lends credence to how he could end up playable as well. I personally see him eventually getting a Cryo Vision, as (iirc) it's been shown that basically every Cryo user we've gotten so far has gotten theirs due to family conflict. And when you think about it, what he did to the Segments could be interpreted as him effectively killing his brethren or maybe some kind of extremely convoluted suicide WHDFHDSF it could honestly go either way
It's still too early to say on the Vision front tho lmfao it'll likely be a good year before he's playable
Moving back onto the Segments for a moment, the reason he gives in-game for creating them is... A lot more understandable than I expected. Giving himself multiple views of the world and effectively stopping time for that version of himself. The lengths he goes to in pursuit of knowledge are genuinely fucking impressive, and also go to show how utterly unhinged he is.
I saw this on Twitter first, but Dottore is extremely focused on preserving the past. Even outside of the Segments, there's lore in artifact descriptions and the like that point back to him as well, and though he keeps it under tight wraps, his conversation with Nahida gives a lot more insight into his mindset + who he is as a person than at first glance.
He says it himself: Humans have a hard time making peace with themselves. Wouldn't that also imply things like the passage of time? Growing older, and one's own mortality?
CHRIST I KNOW THIS IS A LOT BUT I THINK DOTTORE IS THE MOST INVESTED I'VE BEEN IN A CHARACTER IN A LONG FUCKING TIME LOL I AM FILLED WITH THOUGHTS™
There's a lot of potential with his character, and I think that's part of why I love him so much. He's just so fucking fascinating to me. Like. I know I haven't done RP shit in a long ass time (definitely FAR less than I used to), but Dottore is the closest thing I've had to a muse in years. Getting into his head is so unbelievably fucking fun for me
Anyway rant over lmfao back to your regularly scheduled whatever
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kunimikat · 4 years
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How they act after you break up with them.
(I made sure to check but there might be small grammar errors, and this is a long one so strap in 🙇, but hope you enjoy angst+fluff here) but not me actually feeling bad for them after-
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Is more out of it then usual.
The reason you broke up with him is because you felt like it wasn’t a real relationship. And more like you sometimes got to talk during class, and sometimes out of school.
He writes in his a separate notebook of ways he could’ve done better
Starts comparing himself to other guys more often
Leaves earlier then everyone else to got to dorms.
Mumbles even more then usual, and sometimes the only person that can snap him out of it is Aizawa.
Sometimes takes it out on his friends
“Hey Deku!-“
“Not right now Uraraka.”
“Oi, Deku nerd, the-“
“Can you not right now Kacchan?”
“HAAH?-“
“Midoryia! Would you like to study?”
“Maybe later Iida...”
Todoroki offered him soba but it resulted in Midoriya slowly slurping up soba as he looked into the void of people
He shut everyone one out and didn’t talk barely most of the week.
He’d take out a lot of his anger during training.
It somehow finally clicks into place how bad you feel and how much you miss him when All Might pull you aside and asks. “Uhhh...Is Young Midoriya ok? I’m getting real worried....ITS NOT LIKE I DONT WORRY ABOUT MY OTHER STUDENTS HAHAHA! HOW’S-
There’s 15 minutes of your life awkwardly telling All Might how all your classmates are doing.
Which made you want to jump off the top of UA at the moment.
You decide to head to his dorm and ask him about it, cause you feel like it’s your fault.
You walk in on him crying, clutching the shirt you bought for him on his birthday.
You almost dropped to your knees in guilt at the sight
You rushed over and sat by him, comforting him, though it wasn’t much as you started crying too.
Basically a crying festival for an hour.
“Please....Please Y/N I love you so much, I promise I’ll make it work, and I’ll do my best to make it up to you, just please...PLEASE don’t leave me.” You kiss him on the lips and then his hand, “Babe it’s not all on you, I promise I’ll do better this time too, I’m so sorry for being selfish, I love you, ok?” Another crying fest.
After you start dating again:
Always makes sure you’re comfortable, and checks into your dorm before he starts a study session.
Helps you with your work before his. ( Though you insist he doesn’t as he’s gotten points off multiple times for turning in his work late.)
Goes on dates every time you have some free space in your schedules. Somehow ends up in an All Might merch shop 80% of the time.
!!CUDDLE SESSIONS AFTER HERO TRAINING AT ALL TIMES!! Even in Recovery Girl’s office, though many times she bops you both on the head and tells you to get out.
(If you both like All Might) You both geek out over new All Might stuff, and his old interviews while wearing an All Might onesies.
(If you like a different hero) You could spend hours bickering on who’s best hero, pulling up recordings and articles on the. With you holding your favorite hero plushie and him wearing All Might pajamas.
And waking up early just to take a long route to school together.
Makes sure to say ‘I love you’ at every small moment, and compliments you, though he can’t take compliments himself-
If it’s a permanent breakup:
“I...I understand, but why?”
Tears well up in his eyes and he for once he keeps eye contact with you, without looking away
It takes everything in you to not breakdown
“I’m sorry Izuku, I just don’t think it’ll work out in the end.” He grabs your hand and holds it both of his. He puts it to his forehead, nearly on his knees at this point. You try not to cry with him, but you knew it wasn’t going to end up a happily ever after in the end. And you wanted to break it off before that could happen.
“Izuku, I know, I know, I’m so sorry, I wish it couldn’t end like this-“
“Then don’t let it. Please Y/N don’t let this end.”
You eyes welled up as you put a hand over your mouth while repeating ‘I’m sorry, so sorry Izuku’. You looked away from him as you slipped your hand out of his, you close your eyes painfully, the tears finally running down your face. You couldn’t help but look back one more time, and almost wanted to run to where he was and take it all back. He sat on his knees, his head in his hands as painful sobs wracked his body. You quickly leave the room, shutting the door behind you.
You both were pretty quiet and emotionless the whole week.
Midoriya was even worse then before,
It got to the point where sometimes he didn’t eat or sleep
He barely responded to anything anyone said
Hell, even Bakugo was worried at some point
Midoriya would always go back to his dorm and cuddle with the gifts you gave him while you were dating.
It took a long time for him to get over it, and even when he thought it did, he still gets emotional over it
Even after highschool it pains him to see your off doing your own thing without you at his side the whole time
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Quieter then usual
Is so deep in thought, sometimes forgets he’s in class or what he’s doing
During tests, or while working on assignments he’d be so deep in thought he didn’t realize he broke his pencil, or used his quirk on his desk
Instead of having his usual outburst on people he’d just walk off, or click his tounge and walk off
Even during Hero Lessons he’d be less calculated, and not as pumped up
When anyone tried to ask he’d just say “Fuck off, I’m fine.”
His grades slightly dropped
He had bags under his eyes, and had even worse posture then usual
When it came time to leave, he’d be the first one out, and no one could find out where he’d go
A permanent frown was on his face at all times (basically him most of time but with a deeper frown)
No one knew what to do at this point
It didn’t click with you until one day during Hero Lessons
He was sparring with Kirishima and all of a sudden he fainted
Everyone was surprised to say the most
You rushed with Kirishima to Recover Girls office
You both almost busted the door off it’s hinges
She wacked you both on the head but quickly tended to Bakugo, surprising you both as she checked on him
“Oh....I wouldn’t have expected this from Bakugo.” You and Kirishima had confused looks on your faces. “Well he passed out from exhaustion, which I usually see with that foolish Midoriya boy. This one usually keeps up with himself, something must’ve happened.” She cut herself off as she saw the look on your face that said it all. She beckons Kirishima to follow her out, as he still wasn’t getting what was happening.
You finally got a good look at him, and saw just how exhausted he looked. The bags under his eyes, his bruised body, and how pained he looked in his sleep. You hugged the non-bruised part of his arm, and finally let the tears you held let go. “I’m sorry Katsuki...I’m sorry I didn’t see it sooner.” Before you realized he woke up, he placed his free hand on your head, rubbing small and soothing circles on your head. “S’okay, let’s make this work.” You knew you didn’t have to say anything else as you both stayed like that until Recovery Girl came in to kick you both out.
After you start dating again:
Comes to your dorm everyday to get you up knowing you’d oversleep if he didn’t (also wants to see your sleeping face...not in a weird way)
Cooks you breakfast in bed on off days,
You guys cook something together when you have a movie night
Instead of yelling most times, he just makes sure he understands your side of everything before jumping to conclusions
Makes sure he isn’t too rough with you verbally (lol not sure physically)
Brings you to his parents house during some free time since you get along with his mom and dad well
Won’t admit it but adores the fact that his parents love you
Whispers ‘I love you’ when he’s made sure your ‘sleeping’ (you’re not, you just wanna hear him say it all shy like)
You guys go on training dates, where you both train together, then have a picnic where you just trained
Him being more open with PDA, like holding your hand, or laying his head on your shoulder, etc. just small stuff
He loves playing with your hair and twisting it around his fingers while cuddling or studying
You both cheer on your favorite hero during a fight on TV, or you pick a random channel on TV and you just listen to him rant how stupid something is while you lean onto his shoulder at 2am (somehow got him to stay up this late)
If it’s a permanent breakup:
“No...no...you can’t, you can’t be serious”
He sounded so broken. His fists clutched so hard you thought his bones would pop out
Anger was evident in his face, and he honestly scared you with the face he was making
“Y/N....are you joking?” You frown and step back a little, did he really think everything you said was a joke? “No Bakugo, I just think this isnt gonna work out in the end.” You heard him click his tongue, then just look at you in shock, then anger. He looked down, his bangs covering his expression. “So you’re just gonna end it like that? No working anything out, just break up? It was one fucking mistake Y/N.”
“Yeah one big mistake, you don’t suck faces with some other person on accident, Bakugo.” The venom in your voice slicing through the tension filled air. “Can you just fucking forgive me? I won’t do it again.”
“You said that last time, Katsuki, then you go and clown off again-“
Before you could get anything else out Bakugo already had his quirk going in one hand, and the other holding your shoulder down. You both looked surprised, even as he backed away. “No..nononono fuck Y/N baby I’m sorry-” you smacked the hand that reached out for you. You started packing everything, Bakugo’s eyes widened as he just stood in shock. Before he knew it you were leaving already.
“N...NO NO Y/N PLEASE, I’M SORRY-“ he grabbed you by the arm that reached for the door knob. You quickly shrugged him out of his grasp, and opened the door. “Goodbye Bakugo, I hope well for the next person with you.” And you slammed it in his face. He stood there, it’s like the emotions he felt before were completely wiped when you slammed the door on him. It was 8:03pm, he should start getting ready for bed anyway.
For a few weeks he was unresponsive, and only talked when he needed to
His movements were sluggish and he’d often stare at nothing
Bakugo didn’t even glare, or really do anything when Midoriya tried talking him
Or shittyhair, dunce face, raccoon eyes, or soy sauce face
They were all the same, and just molded into one voice every time someone tried talking to him
After a while he got over it, but he still regrets what he did
You helped him through so much yet he went off and did stupid shit
Even after highschool, he’d still keep up on you frequently through social media
Basically stalking you on there, guessing he never truly got over it once he felt tears subconsciously stream down his face as he saw you with someone else, happier.
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He felt like he didn’t do anything wrong, and he was confused at the throb in his heart every time you looked away from him or ignored him.
So he did ask you, and all you did was look at him like he just hit you.
Why did you look so hurt?
Todoroki shrugged it off, thinking you’d come back like you did after every fight you guys had
But you didn’t, and that’s what took an actual toll on him
More emotional
A permanent frown on his pretty features most of the time
All he mostly eats is soba
He didn’t know how to handle this in all honesty
Sometimes he’d just stare at you, and even when you looked back he’d just stare...
Sometimes he’s so out of it he doesn’t realize he’s either froze the entire classroom or was a living breathing radiator, or both (rip Momo, Satou, and Tokoyami)
He’d ask Midoryia for help but it came out as a fumbled mess most of the time:
“Midoryia...how do you hurt....them, a lot...without...? Can you help?
Midoryia is just like:
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(Sorry I had to add that in I was cackling sm from it)
“I think you should just talk to them Todoroki.”
That was harder to do then he expected, you mangaged to avoid him pretty well,
One day he was just fed up and as soon as the bell rang he took your hand and left the class
He takes you to an empty classroom, his left side nearly giving you frostbite
You were about to yell at him before you saw his broken expression
“What...what did I do for it to be like this?” You we’re now quiet as you saw the confused and hurt expression on his face. Him barely being able to control either of his quirks, he was shaking, yet still held a confused expression. It just clicked with you, Todoroki wasn’t used to the sudden emotions or feelings, and when one of the people he’d usually go to to talk about it wasn’t there, he started to crumble.
You hugged him tightly , not caring if his quirks messed up your uniform. “I’m sorry Y/N....I’m sorry I’m not enough, but-“ You cover his mouth as tears fell from your eyes and onto the ground or his uniform. “I- I-I’m so sorry Todo...it’s just you never gave me affection and I was being so selfish and petty about it, I just- I didn’t realize that you went through your own experience for it to turn out like this. It’s not your fault, and I love you the way you are Shoto.” Todoroki didn’t even notice the tears come down his face as you kissed him over and over again. A small ‘I’m sorry’ from you every time. His quirks calmed down and now you were holding each other in a random classroom. You’re heart nearly stopped as you looked up at him and saw a small, teary eyed smile.
After you start Dating again:
Todoroki was much more observant
He’d stay up late readings articles saying “How to understand emotions” or “Is there other good food then Cold Soba” wait-
Regularly gets you gifts, even though most of the time you make him return the stuff since he’s been getting so much with his dads card
Endeavor ended up yelling at you both in a 7/11 while you were stuffing your faces with a soba flavored chips
You both figured out a way to get Todoroki to express himself without words
He’d slightly activate his left side if he wanted any sort of attention, and his right side was if he was feeling stressed or upset
He subconsciously goes to your dorm now to check up on you to make sure you’ve had a glass of water, dinner or anything really (He just wanted a reason to go to your dorm)
You played with his hair once, and he’s never going back
When cuddling he’d lay his head in the crook of your neck, hoping to feel you playing with his hair
You push him to start taking therapy sessions to understand what emotions he’s feeling and how to express them
Takes you in your free time to an empty field just to hear you talk, and learn more about you
And he’d always wake up early and made sure to get a few snacks for you before you woke up and brought them to your dorm room (Last time he tried to cook he almost burned the kitchen down)
Overall Todoroki just loves giving you small head pats now, you don’t know where it came from but you didn’t complain
Poor bby stuttered so hard the first time he said ‘I love you’ you giggled
Ended up making him feel embarrassed and like he did something wrong, but you quickly kissed him/praised him
He can’t stop saying it now, one time you picked up his pencil, before you could hand it to him just a sudden “I love you Y/N” the entire class looked at you both in shock
“STOP SUCKING FACES OVER THERE!”
“SHUT UP BAKUGO”
“HAAAH?”
Todoroki is the happiest he’s been.
If it’s a permanent breakup:
“Over? What do you mean we’re over?”
You felt so horrible by the the pure confusion on his face
But the rude things he said to you, over powering your want to get back with him
Lately Todoroki has been more protective, and rude. Insulting everything you do, belittling you slightly. It just added up and you were tired of it
Todoroki tilted his head to the side, deep in thought.
“Y/N your being on the dumber side again, are you hanging out with them too much?” You were taken aback by how nonchalantly he insulted you and your friends. “Excuse me? Todoroki did I hear you right?” You stepped foward leaning your head toward him. “Of course you can, or did Bakugo’s yelling make you not hear so well?” The fact he said it with no emotion, or nothing to it was making you clench your fist. “The hell has gotten into you Todoroki?” You shove his shoulder a bit. He frowned at you heavily making you flinch. “Well if you didn’t go and ignore me most of this week maybe I wouldn’t be like this. I usually hold my tongue but you’ve been rude this entire week.”
You stood there speechless. “Well Ex-fucking-cuse me Shoto. Maybe if you didn’t insult me all the damn time I wouldn’t ignore you, or wait for an decent apology.”
You drag out the last words as you glared at him, Todoroki giving one back. “I’m only telling the truth so you don’t look dumb. I’m helping you out Y/N, I thought you’d understand.” You scoff in utter shock, you couldn’t help the sudden urge to slap some sense into him. Now he stood speechless, the force in that slap causing his hair to look messy, and a red mark on his cheek. Tears were in your eyes as you clenched your fist, biting your lip from cussing him out on the spot. “Your lucky I don’t beat your sorry ass, just...just the the fuck out Todoroki!” You pushed him toward the door. He looked at you with no emotion in his face as he saw you start to bawl your eyes out. “Just...just get the hell out Todoroki, it’s over, we’re over.” He felt a pang in his heart, but choose to ignore it and just left.
It only actually came to him during the night as he was about to walk to your dorm after a nightmare, when he realized the entire conversation
He tried knocking on your door but you didn’t answer, even though he could hear your music
He went back to his dorm, sat on his bed and just had a full mental breakdown
Realizing his main emotional support that helped him through mostly everything was gone
He felt he said stuff his father said to you already which made it even worse
He tried texting and calling you but you had him blocked on everything
He repeated the entire conversation in his head, just now coming to how disgusting he really did sound
Todoroki for that whole week was an emotional wreck
During hero training if he was thinking about you or what he did he doesn’t notice poor Satou trying to get out of his wall of Ice.
Is always with Midoryia at some given time,
He kind of clinged onto people in his circle that gave him attention of some sort
When he some time passed he eventually got over it
After Highschool you both kept in touch, but it pained him when he saw you engaged and happy with another person
But he was happy if you were happy.
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Heyyy so this is probably the longest thing I’ve written since like my last Wattpad fanfics I used to do(yikes). But hope you enjoy, and don’t be afraid to request! I’m taking them now so go wild.
Sorry that they were all confusing it’s my first hcs+scenario thingy, but I have a few other things in the works so... 💃🕺
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andypantsx3 · 3 years
Note
Hii can I request a deleted scene for "if I could keep cool" that tells chapter 2 from Shouto's POV? I would absolutely love to c what was going through Shouto's head when he figured out that Y/N was just a cleaning lady and what was the moment that made him want to ask her out when he saw her at his house afterwards! Thank u!!
I accidentally got carried away, so this bad boy is 1.9k!! My apologies lol. I hope you like it!!
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It wasn’t every day that someone told Shouto Todoroki to go fuck himself. 
Particularly not quirkless civilians, and never those he’d rescued. 
There was usually a lot more breathless gratitude, some bowing and scraping, and—mystifyingly—a lot of phone numbers, handkerchiefs, and very unsubtle attempts to get a hand or two around his biceps. Shouto didn’t really know what his biceps had to do with it, but he’d seen the same thing happen to Midoriya and Kirishima as well—and Bakugou once, before he’d nearly gnawed the woman’s hands off—so he assumed it was just another social cue he’d never understand.
As little as he cared for social cues, however, he was certain that there was usually a lot more thank you and a little less go fuck yourself involved in the whole rescuing process.
But then, he’d also never told off a civilian for having been kidnapped before. 
A civilian who, he’d come to realize almost immediately afterward, hadn’t deserved it.
When he’d asked his mother her advice over the phone, she’d told him the best thing to do was to be honest and try to start fresh. “White flowers mean forgiveness—tulips new beginnings,” she’d advised him.
So Shouto had ducked into the nearest florist and brought back an apology in hopes that you would accept it. 
He might have known, however, that you’d manage to turn even a simple apology completely on its head.
The clatter of cleaning supplies in his kitchen on Thursday afternoon told Shouto you’d let yourself in for your usual shift. He followed the sound, only for it to halt at his approach, the kitchen seemingly empty as he drew nearer.
He stopped short, fighting down a surprised swell of amusement when he realized you’d ducked down, hiding yourself behind his counters as if anyone, especially a pro hero, might be fooled by that.
“I know you’re there,” he said, keeping his tone even.
He heard a muttered swear word, and then you were rising slowly to your feet, wearing a sheepish expression, and clutching a bottle of windex like a weapon.
You looked just as you had the day of your rescue, though obviously a little less harrowed by a kidnapping. You were dressed casually in jeans and a simple shirt, no indicator that you were an employee of a cleaning service—Shouto felt at least a little justified in his mistake from last week.
You were clearly a college student, the backpack dumped at his kitchen island was evidence of that much, overflowing with textbooks and notes as it was, and you looked just slightly disheveled, like you might have come straight from class.
It was part of some nebulous, unassuming appeal to you, now that he had occasion to notice. He’d remembered your features twisted up in disdain, but they were open in surprise now, your eyes wide, fixed on him. His own eyes were drawn to the scrunch of your nose, a little curl of embarrassment that he suddenly found himself unable to tear his gaze away from.
“I, uh, thought you weren’t supposed to be here,” you admitted to him with a visible cringe.
Shouto almost laughed. He didn’t know much about you, but it was clear to him now that you weren’t anything like a crazy fan. You looked like you’d rather be anywhere but here at the moment. In fact, you looked rather like you might bolt any second.
A strange feeling shifted in his chest, and Shouto cut right to the chase.
“I owe you an apology,” he said simply.
You startled so violently that you dropped the windex. “W-what?”
Shouto sighed, admitting, “My manager schedules the cleaning days. I didn’t realize that you were—that is to say, I thought you were a fan who had broken in and managed to get kidnapped while you were at it.”
You gaped, another confused little expression that Shouto found himself fixating on with an intensity that surprised him. The weird feeling in his chest shifted, burning a little hotter. 
He wondered absently what other expressions he could get you to make.
“Oh, I, um...nope. Not a fan,” you said, and the feeling grew more insistent. 
He paused over the phrasing—not a fan. 
It had never bothered him before, when someone was a bigger fan of a classmate than they were of him, or weren’t really a hero fan at all. Shouto honestly did not quite understand why hero work was so tied up in fandom in the first place, and only attended fan events because his manager’s temper was not a thing to be trifled with. 
He wanted to be a hero who put people at ease, but ease was the last thing he felt with people clamoring all over him. Fighting villains was infinitely more preferable.
So why did your admission that you weren’t a fan of his niggle at his brain, like a particularly insistent parasite?
Who were you a fan of, if not him? 
“...Well, glad that’s cleared up now. I’ll just, uh, go then,” you said, grabbing an armful of the cleaning supplies and shoving it back under the sink hastily.
Shouto had moved before he knew what he was doing, getting himself in between you and the door out to the hallway. 
“Wait,” he said, feeling uncomfortable. “I want to make up for what I said to you. You...didn’t deserve that, especially not right after you’d been kidnapped by a villain.”
He watched you eye the space between his hip and the counter, like you were considering making a break for it. As he watched your face, he felt some strange hope that you might try it, a certainty he would catch you. 
...Why did he want to catch you?
You waved a hand. “It’s fine. You saved me, we can call it even.”
Shouto’s mouth turned down minutely. He’d behaved badly, but surely you’d credit him better manners than that. “It’s my fault you were taken in the first place. I’d like to apologize properly.”
Your face did something weird, then, another distracting little curl of the nose. “You don’t actually have to go fuck yourself,” you blurted.
Shouto stared at you, caught off guard.
“Uh, I mean. You saved my life,” you babbled suddenly. “And yeah what you said to me was super rude, but what I said to you was also super rude. So, um, I’m sorry too. And I really would just like to call it even and forget about it because it’s super embarrassing for both of us and I could literally die thinking about it.”
You stopped suddenly, looking self-conscious like you’d realized you’d been rambling. Shouto almost wished you hadn’t.
“I hadn’t really planned on it,” he said quickly.
“Hadn’t planned on what?”
“Fucking myself,” he clarified. You choked on a shocked laugh, and he let a small smile tug at his mouth—there.
Finally.
Finally you looked a little more comfortable with him. 
Shouto tried hard not to look too pleased with himself.
“Oh, well that’s good, then," you said. Then you puffed up a little, adding, "That’s probably a job for your actual secret lover.”
Good lord. “Not you, too.”
You threw him a smile, and Shouto’s heartbeat tripped over itself. “But I have evidence. I saw that homemade soup in your fridge once with the love note attached.”
It took him a moment to focus on what you were saying, but Shouto recalled the soup in question. It had been quite good, even if Bakugou had spent almost a half an hour ranting about what a weak ass little bitch he was for catching a cold. It had almost been worth it, the soup was that delicious. “Ah yes. That secret lover.”
“Cute pet name, too,” you said.
Shouto let out a low laugh, recalling the note. “You fucking fuck, was it?”
You laughed too, tension easing from your shoulders. Shouto’s eyes hungrily traced even that small movement.
A dawning sense of what was happening finally settled over him as he pronounced, “As it happens, however, I did already plan more of an apology.”
You looked up at him, your brow furrowing. “You planned...more of an apology?”
He gestured to a tall vase of white tulips on the kitchen counter. Your eyes went a little rounder as you observed them. You looked like you weren’t sure if they were for you, as if there were another previously kidnapped cleaning girl lurking about, who might be in need of an apology.
What a fascinating thing you were.
“I’ve been told that they mean forgiveness and new beginnings. I had hoped that we might...start over,” Shouto explained. He couldn’t help but feel self-conscious.
“I didn’t bring you any flowers,” you blurted.
He covered up a surprised laugh with a cough, the feeling in his stomach burning hotter. “I hadn’t expected them.”
He watched you turn back thoughtfully to the bouquet, certain now.
Over the phone, his mother had also said white flowers carried connotations of honor and purity. Two notions, Shouto realized with a growing sense of curiosity, that may be entirely inapplicable to his feelings about you.
He didn’t know much about you, but he knew for certain that he’d like to know more. And as he watched you reach out to pluck at a petal, wearing a shy little smile, he thought that yes, honor and purity had very little to do with his intentions at the moment.
You thanked him for the flowers, and Shouto made it clear to you that he hadn’t meant what he’d said about you being unwelcome here. He wanted—no, desired your return now. 
“That’s good to hear, thank you,” you said. Then your smile went a little mischievous. “As you can see, though, it didn’t really deter me.”
Shouto let himself smirk. “If I hadn’t seen the cleaning supplies already on the counter, I would be concerned that you’d come back for revenge.”
“There’s still time,” you joked. “Maybe I was going to play the long game and fill all the bottles with Sprite.”
The mulish statement surprised him into another laugh. “I hope the flowers are enough of a deterrent.”
You looked over the flowers again, then smiled up at him. His eyes caught on your mouth.
“The bribe has been accepted. Your countertops are safe from me.” You paused, then added, “For now.”
The hot feeling was everywhere now, simmering just underneath Shouto’s skin. He left himself lean towards you, relishing in the way your breath caught in a tiny hitch. “Be warned that I will do whatever it takes to ensure the safety of my countertops.”
You complained that he hardly used them, but complied nevertheless. Then you bullied him out of the kitchen, that tiny little scrunch back on your nose.
Shouto let you have your way, making his way over to the couch and settling on it with a book he had absolutely no intention of reading. Instead, as he watched you clean, he considered things.
He had always been straightforward about his goals. Once he’d chosen heroism as his dream, he’d let nothing stand in his way, working diligently all through UA, shooting nonstop through the ranks before breaking into the top five this year, one of the youngest to have ever done it. 
He was deliberate about what he wanted. He worked hard for what he wanted.
And as he wandered back towards the kitchen, questions ready in his mouth, he knew what else he wanted.
He wanted to know more about you.
He wanted to spend more time with you.
He wanted…
Well, he rather thought he wanted you.
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I was going to edit this but every time I went to touch it, I made it worse. I hope you liked it anyway!
Garbage Fest masterlist & schedule.
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onlythebrave-mp3 · 4 years
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my top 2020 fics!
okay! so i recently jumped back into this fandom after a couple of years, and started reading fic again, and i wanted to rec some of my favorites that were written this year. there’s ten on this list, and i probably could’ve done like 30 but this is already so long lol. it’s kind of in a general order, so #1 is my fav for this year, but i tried not to focus on the ranking too much because it stresses me out and i don’t need any more anxiety so it’s ended up being a pretty vague system.
1.  Our Lives, Non-Fiction (113k) by @indiaalphawhiskey 
listen. I’ve reblogged this fic like 10 times. I’ve read it twice already and it came out less than 3 weeks ago. It is an instant classic, right up there with fics like TIF or Wear it like a Crown. It has gorgeous, gorgeous writing, a thoroughly developed plot and well written character development, and such a compelling story. It is a marcel/louis fic, and I usually shy away from that kind of thing, but i’m so glad i didn’t this time because god, this one is so good. Seriously, if anyone ends up reading it, come and rant to me about it and we can cry together. Halfway through the second chapter, I created a note on my phone so I could keep track of everything I loved, and my comment on that fic is essentially a love letter to @indiaalphawhiskey. It's just so good. If you’re going to read one fic off this list, read this one. 
2. Loving You's a Bloodsport (106k) by @rosesau
okay i’m pretty sure this one made me cry like four times, which is a feat for me because i’m not usually a crier. Its soulmates with a little bit of a twist, and the plot is so well developed. Harry and louis’ feelings and their progression are written so vividly and i wish i could forget that i read it so i could go and read it again for the first time. It's also got some enemies to lovers, which is my favorite trope, and all of the side characters are beautifully developed as well. Prince!Harry, soldier!Louis, angsty soulmates. What more could you want? Oh and if you’re not convinced enough, here is a quote that fucking follows me around because its so beautiful: “Love and hate are two sharp knives balanced on a very fine line and I’ve cut myself on both because of you.” (ohmygod)
3. Mine Would Be You (114k) by @crinkle-eyed-boo
okay this one is listed at number three but it really should be 1c lol. I started this one at 11 pm like an idiot, and i don’t think i slept that night at all. It's Exes to lovers, and it's so well written. It switches between the past and the present, it's  heartbreakingly beautiful, the breakup and resolution are both so realistically written as well, and there's a great ot5 plotline too that i really loved. This one was also an instant classic- i bookmarked it before i even finished reading it. It's also got beautiful art and Louis and Harry are both artists in NYC, which I'm a slut for. Please read this one, it's so good.
okay i just realized how long this got so i’m putting the rest under the cut
4. The Murmur of Yearning (93k) by @mediawhorefics (for some reason tumblr isn’t letting me tag them??) | mediawhore on ao3 
I just finished this one, and my goddddddd it's so good. I read it in a day, and it's essentially 100k. Which isn’t that unusual for me except I did skip a class to get through it (an exam prep class. Not my finest moment but I passed. so.) There are tons of original characters that draw you in, and the whole world that is created is so fascinating and detailed. There's also no homophobia, so if you like historical fics but get triggered by that kind of thing, this is for you! Also, if you’re worried about the non-con elements, I'm sure you could message the author but also feel free to check in with me! I’ll definitely be rereading it in the near future and am totally up for discussing and crying over this fic with anyone.
5.��Remember Me Fondly by @bluejeanlouis | kiddle on ao3 
ahhhhhhh this one made me sob too! It's set in both the present and the past, and I fell in love with all of the characters. This one is also heartbreaking, but I promise there’s a happy ending. Also, they way this fic deals with the fame and the homophobia and tours that harry and louis went through -even if it isn’t actually canon and is set in the 90s- is so vividly painful and realistic. It's written half through a journalist’s eyes and half through harry and louis, yet the switch in pov is so seamless and fluid and adds so much to the piece. 11/10.
6. Nothing But You On My Mind (83k) by @absoloutenonsense | nonsensedarling on ao3
okay. I started this in the middle of the night, and told myself I'd read one chapter to see if I liked it and then I would go to sleep. I'm pretty sure I read like 6. It sucks you in right from the beginning, and there's such a well developed plot. And it's so unpredictable and all of the details are so nuanced and tiny and then you look back at everything after you’ve finished it and go oh. Ohhhhhh. This one is also enemies to lovers. Are we sensing a pattern here?
7. An Invincible Summer (44k) by @twopoppies | Brooklyn_Babylon on ao3 
so as you can see this one is only 45k but i just love it so much that i’m rec’ing in anyways. It’s such a gentle, exploratory piece of literal art, and I kind of want to stay in the world that was created forever. Its set in the 1940s on a farm and i know @twopoppies has said that it started off as an excuse for barn sex, but it such a vivid story and its heartbreaking and emotional and uplifting all at once and please please please go read this. The only critique I have of it is that it's only 40k.
8. Somewhere in Between Lightning (99k) by @nauticalleeds, @shiningdistraction, and jassy117 on ao3
So this one's exes-to-lovers as well, and it's written in such a realistic way. Also i’m in love with the concept of louis on love island, despite the fact that he said he hates it. There's a sauna scene that I still think about sometimes. It's got just the right amount of angst and fluff and pining and despite the fact that it's set on a show that is usually pretty dramatic and unrealistic, this is written in a really beautiful but pragmatic way. I love it. i’ve got it  downloaded on my phone so I can read little snippets of it sometimes if I have to wait somewhere.
9. You’ve Got My Devotion (Hate You Sometimes) (95k) by @harryrainbows | lucythegoosey on ao3 
god so this one incorporates some of Fine Line into it, and wouldn’t say it's a song fic so much as it is written as a canon compliant fic that ties harry’s songs into it and its done so fucking well oh my god. Harry and Louis are exes in this one too (lol i'm sorry) and the build up of them getting together and the pining and longing is written really well.
10. At Risk, I Fold (15k) by @bearmustard | clare328 on ao3 
so i know this one is only 15k, but I put this in the list anyways. It's canon compliant, and it does mention the stunts (as stunts), but don’t let that deter you. Harry and Louis are written almost exactly as i’ve imagined them, and this one is such a heartbreaking look into the resilience and love and bravery that they have. It made me cry despite the fact that it’s not really a glum fic. The only reason it is last on the list is because it's shorter and i was mostly intending this to be a long fic rec. The love that they have for each other really shines through in this one, and it’s super gentle and soft and sad and happy all at once and just please go read it.
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nancydfan · 3 years
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So I have been a fan of resident evil for a while now and I have to say without a shadow of a doubt Ethan is my favorite protagonist. I feel like the rest of the protagonists in the series are kinda the same, you’ve got the police/army guys (Leon and Chris) who are determined to save the world, and then with the rest of them they’re kinda the same, badass people willing to give their all to get rid of evil and return the world back to normal. And that’s fine, except it’s a kind of story that’s been told over and over again and not just in resident evil.
That’s why I love Ethan so much. He is a breath of fresh air that the series needed. And while yes, you can argue that his type of storyline has also been used a lot, it’s something that has never been explored in resident evil.
With the rest of the protagonists, they choose to fight. They volunteer to put themselves in horrifying scenarios for the greater good.
Ethan isn’t like that.
He’s literally just your typical average dude. He has a normal job, and has a relatively normal life which he was happy to spend with Mia until she went missing.
In RE7 Ethan doesn’t volunteer to deal with the horrors that he faces. He just wanted his wife back, and even after 3 years he still loves her enough to drop everything and rush out to find her.
When I finished RE7, I liked Ethan as a main character, but it was RE8 that made me fall in love with him. In RE7 there were a lot of times when he just didn’t respond or kind of reacts underwhelmingly, but I think this is less of his character and more of Capcom trying to make you feel more like Ethan and having him react too much might take you out of feeling like the main character is you.
Of course his actions are still very reflective of him, like when he first enters the house and has to “kill” Mia the first time, when she reaches out to him he reaches right back, implying that he regrets what just happened and that he still wants her to be okay, no matter what is wrong with her.
I know Jacksepticeye said one of the reasons why he doesn’t like Ethan is because he doesn’t have a character arc, but I disagree. Like I said, Ethan goes from not being very vocal at times/ underwhelming reactions in RE7 to I feel the exact opposite in 8; he talks a lot more with lines that make sense, and you can feel his emotions at times even with just seeing his hands. Now one can argue that Capcom just wrote Ethan differently, which I can see.
But I feel as though Ethan has changed- in the first game, he’s scared and confused, and finally ends on frustration as the game nears its end. In RE8 he is angry, angry that his life keeps getting turned on it’s head because of some stupid mold. He is angry, and fueled by his grief and determination to save the only family (he thinks) he has left. He is 100% done with everything and has honestly given his last fuck a long time ago.
And again, this is what makes him special- he doesn’t necessarily care about the mold, about Miranda or any of the “bigger issue” things- he just wants his family. In 7 he just wants to get his wife and get out of there, and In 8 he just wants to save his daughter. He didn’t sign up to be a hero, to save the world from it’s own creations. He just wants his family.
And honestly that’s what makes him more human and alive to me than the rest of the protagonists- the rest of them kind of just feel like characters with their (almost cheesy) need to take on insurmountable problems to save the world. But Ethan is different, he’s just a man who probably just wants to do his taxes in peace and have a normal, quiet life. The rest of the protagonists, though I’m sure would love to quit, wouldn’t change their jobs or their situations because they know someone has to do it and it might as well be them. But not Ethan. If he had the choice than he’d make it so none of this ever happened, and that he and his family never have to be involved in something like this again.
Which is why I think this is what makes his sacrifice so much more tragic. With any of the other protagonists yes we would be sad but we’d find comfort in knowing that they died doing what they loved (saving people), and wouldn’t have it any other way.
But Ethan is different.
He didn’t want to sacrifice himself- we can see that in the way he struggles with Chris to get out, to stay in one piece for his daughter because he wants to be there for her. He went through hell and he just wants to see his little girl grow up. And when he hears Mia’s alive that want only grows more because he has a chance to have his family back, but I think he knows he can’t. He’s falling apart, his body has dealt with so much and kept him alive but not for much longer. And so even though he desperately wants to go back with Chris, after hearing Mia’s alive he knows he can let go. I think another part of why he was fighting so hard to escape with Chris is because he didn’t want Rose to live without both of her parents, but when he hears Mia’s alive he realizes that Rose will be okay, she will at least have one parent. He is so tired, so tired of fighting that even though he hates the fact that he can’t go back with her (you can physically hear the pain in his voice when he says “Goodbye Rosemary”), he knows that it’s something he has to do.
And he isn’t happy or content with sacrificing himself. In fact this is the last thing he wanted, which again is what makes it so heart wrenching. After all the pain he’s been through he doesn’t even get to see his daughter grow up, doesn’t get to grow old with his wife, his painful adventure to get his family back ends just as painfully as he pulls the trigger to destroy the mold.
This is why Ethan is special to me. Ethan is just a man who wanted to be happy with his family, not some stereotypical stone cold hero who would gladly give up his life for the greater good. He is truly unique and in a way I saw myself in him and his personality, which is what crushed me so much when he died. I wanted him to have a good ending and he got handed a shitty end. I really hope Capcom gives him a good resolution, one where he doesn’t have to be a main character at all but at least give us something where we know he’s okay and reunited with his family.
Sorry for getting weepy and deep lol, it’s just I really love Ethan and have no one to talk about how upset I am at his ending lol. Thanks for listening to my rant!
Oh my dear nonnie you’re always welcome to rant in my inbox. Long or not, thoughts, etc. that’s why my box is always open :)
And just so you know, I’m currently crying in an airport lobby over Ethan Winters 😆
I’m on mobile so I won’t be able to properly respond probably except to say you are absolutely right on all of these things. He really is such a stark contrast to the rest of the RE heroes and that’s what makes him so special to me too. He is just a man. A man who does everything he can for his family. All he wants to do is be left alone to love his wife and raise his daughter. I keep thinking of that scene in re8 where he’s talking to the doc. That is the Ethan Winters Capcom refuses to let us see all that much. Easy, happy, carefree moment. There’s a lightness to his voice. He doesn’t care about the problems of the world. That isn’t his job too. And it’s unbelievably tragic that not only does he get pulled into this twice (with three years of suffering for Mia before Dulvey and then the heartache of her “murder” and Rose’s kidnapping), he then dies in the end???? He doesn’t even get the reward to live with his wife and daughter? WHAT DID ETHAN WINTERS DO TO YOU, CAPCOM!!?
also overcome? Miss me w that bullshit. Y’all blew him to smithereens.
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I swear if Capcom doesn’t bring him back in some way I don’t know how I’ll proceed w this series. I love Leon and Claire and Jill a lot too but nothing like Ethan. And I’m super not interested in getting my heart ripped out every few years. Especially w a new protagonist.
Ethan is just the perfect representation of deserved better. He pays his taxes on time, probably helps that old lady down the street whose husband just died. Tells the same joke we’ve all heard a thousand times to the point only Mia and him are laughing at it. He would be there for every parent teacher conference and up at 130 with a flashlight chasing away the monsters from Rose’s closet. The world may be crazy somewhere but he’s content to just be here with his family.
And Capcom took all of that away. I don’t think I’ll ever not be angry about it.
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jacepens · 3 years
Note
Hey, how u doing? I wanted to ask for you for indications on washette fanfics, what are the best that you have
p.s. and yes, I do want to hear as well about yours in that list as well, 'cause they're gold
Hey! I'm doing alright:) Thanks for asking! What about you? (is this the correct tumblr to anon etiquette?)
Oh goodness this is such a loaded question because the answer is many. I hope you're alright with a big list sorted by category <3
Fluff! Fluff!!
The French Mistake
One of the first washette fics I read, so it holds a special place in my heart. A little silly, a little lams, ultimately very cute and good time.
Under the Arches of Moonlight and Sky
Just very good, cute, soft weary bed sharing. (this is only wholesome, I swear)
Let's Dance
Short, sweet fic with dance instructor George and our beloved two left feet Laf:)
I Like You Better in Real Life
Did someone say Influencer/Youtuber!Laf and President!George?? No??! Well start and read this fic. Seriously, it's a longer one, and just really damn cute. A bit of slow burn in terms of internalized homophobia (done in a good way) and trans Laf?? Yes. It's really so good.
The Prince
Ok, ok, it's one of mine. The one chapter is deceiving, it's decently long and featuring Prince!Laf and Royal Knight!George!:) Also magic!! angst, fluff, denial of feelings but then of course love confessions;) after angst though, don't worry haha.
Fathoms and Foundlings
Ooooohh boy. This. This one. Mermaid Laf and regular ol George! So so so well written, I mean, the feelings, the war, the weather, literally everything you can name, it's spectacular in this fic. Be warned, it is incomplete, but I remember when the latest chapter was released when I lost all hope (plus the author is still active) so I definitely don't count this one out of being updated!:) But, I'll be honest, I'm unsure about it being finished BUT I still think you should 1000% read this because you really will not find something like it anywhere else and it's just so cute!! Did I mention fucking amazing?
Whom can we trust now?
Platonic washette!! Really well written and just altogether really well put together!:) comfort after Arnold's betrayal! Seriously, I highly recommend this fic it's just so perfect of their relationship and cuuute.
The Particulars of Language
Oh goodness. Oooh goodness. This is so so cute. A nice little blend of angst and fluff and did I mention internalized homophobia? (In a good way, if that makes sense) Also so well-written by an incredible author, I just- language confusion. Need I say more??
Marque
Ok, ok, it's been too long since I read this one, so I will say, it is very tentatively going in this category. I just love soulmate au washette! Angst! Kidnapping? ...no final chapter. So I'm not sure, it could've been planned on ending very happy and fluffy! I do believe overall, this leans on the darker side, but I know I really love this one and they love each other. I want more washette soulmate aus.
Breaks your heart, puts it back together
what's my name, what's my station
Oh God oh fuck it's this one. (said with love). Brutal? Hot? Expanding my vocabulary?? An incredibly beautiful use of metaphors??? Actually feel like crying when I read it. Yeah. This is amazing.
May the Melody Disarm Us
Oh Godd oh Fuck it's this one. (maybe I should change this section's title) this one isn't even angsty per se, it's just like...brutally beautiful. They love each so much but oh my god. The metaphors, the way the author sets the scene and environment and everything! Ugh. So so good.
Let Down My Guard
Oh dear lord in heaven above preserve me. I'm gonna be dramatic but there are simply not enough words in the universe I have that can describe how I feel about this fic and how damn incredible it is!! And boy do I mean it when I say this one breaks your heart and puts it back together. I have seriously never sobbed over any piece of fiction like I did this. Just ahhhh. The feelings they develop for each other, the confusion of cultures, the secrets revealed?? I didn't even tell you Laf is a mermaid yet. Just- please. Please read this. It will rip your heart out, but it will put it back together. But really, this is just a fucking masterpiece and so so beautiful.
Porn With Plot
that dress you like
Very nicely done smut + feels! (Did I mention how nicely it's all done?) Oh! Did I mention genderqueer Laf? Yes.
Mon General / My Marquis
Ok the only reason this is going in this category is because I find the others up there more heart-breaky than this one. I love this one!! The historical details! Their loving relationship!! Very very good and lovely. With some angst of course.
The Mistranslation
Oh God oh Fuck it's this one. (I'll be saying that a lot). Would you like all these categories put into one beautiful fic?? Here it is, here. It's incredible. Please read it. It's free serotonin. (Did I mention incredibly written??)
The Things I Would Do to You
Ahhh ok. So. Super duper sweet, lots of angst sprinkled throughout but Laf's visit to Mount Vernon + feels + (smut). Need I say more??! Seriously, this is wonderful.
Not So Easy to be the Teacher's Pet
Oh. Oh god it's this one. So this is borderline Oof (Laf is 17) but if that does not bother you, then you are in for a treat!(??) Ok but really, lots of feels, denial of feelings, way-too-sweet-for-his-own-good Lafayette and poor confused George. Just fantastic.
Devil to Pay
Hoooo boy. If you like pirates or sea adventures, (hot pirate captains. I'm just gonna say it) then I'm literally begging you to read this. Kidnapped noble Laf?? Slowly falling for the pirate captain Washington?? Not to mention so many maritime details and wonderful emotions, beautifully crafted just. Spectacular. Please, read it if you haven't. Even if pirates don't appeal to you, they will after this fic.
A secret weapon
Ahhhh!!! Thiiiiiis. Is everything. Ok, yes, it includes more than washette, but I mean come on, it's (sexy) demons. It's desperate Washington trying to win a war and fight his gay feelings (guess which fight he wins?) But also, super well written and detailed and feels!! I adore this fic, and the whole series is a treat. Go read it. It's wonderful, you won't regret it.
Oof (not in a good way)
The Sweet Enjoyment of Partaking
If the not-so-sweet side intrigues you more, this is one of the few washette fics that I do love and is...not so nice. It's really good as a not nice piece! Pretty straightforward and fucked up. Ya (I) love to see it.
Transmutation
Oooohhhhhh. This is a fic I didn't read for a while just because I didn't know what it was but boy let me tell you, it is soo good. I'll say it's not as oof as the fic above, but oooh maaaannnnn. I don't know how to describe it just, don't expect sweet things, but if darker takes are your thing please go read this. You will not regret it. It's so damn good.
OW
Day One Way, By Night Another
Ok ok here me out. This one might seem a bit random and it is. It's very short and for the longest time I didn't read it until I did and said ow because ow!!? I find this has the most impact going in unarmed so...watch out. (but like check it out. it's just so unique I really do love it)
Once More, With Feeling
Oh GOD. This one is quite brief and straightforward but if you are looking to rip your heart out with feels and angst then boy do I have the perfect fic for you. But seriously, it's so well-written and just expresses all the feelings so so perfectly. But at what cost? (Pls read it)
A Beautiful Tragedy
Hello darkness my old friend. Ok but seriously, this fic still remains so impactful in my own mind just as the writer. It's not a happy ending, but I try to leave you with hope. Pretty music that I highly recommend listening to, I don't know. I think it's really good, I don't say that often about my own stuff soo if you're ok with heavy amounts of angst and pretty aesthetics then check this ok!:) (but guard your heart, sorry not sorry<3)
Porn Without Plot
Betrayals and Allies
So, admittedly, this one very tentatively goes into this category because I find compared to the others, this one has less feels and less focus on it, but don't get me wrong this is very emotional!! It displays their relationship and love so cutely (and smutily..? new word) and as extra bonus it fills in the gaps of the deleted scene from Turn. You know the one;) It's very good!!
Cold Nights
Look at me adding another of my own. This is super duper short, but I kinda like how the emotions turned out. I think this was the beginning of my first dive into my current style of writing so that's cool I guess? But yeah no, it's porn without plot lol.
What Good is Honor When You're Starving?
Oh dear, another of mine in this category. I barely put this here, but the main focus is on the smut, but there are many many feels aplenty. Oh wait, did I mention vampire Laf? George definitely not falling in love... but really, I like how this one turned out!:) Good sexy vampire times (with feelings)
Ah wow! You stuck with me! Thank you! I...tried to keep it brief. This is not an exhaustive list by any means btw, there were a few (many) I decided to cut because I wanted this list to be all encompassing of many authors, styles, etc.
But anon, thank you for the ask and giving me the chance to rant about my favorite fics! My apologies on taking so long to finish, I hope you can understand my life has been a little hectic, but I always try to make time for washette;)
Thank you!!<3
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alirhi · 3 years
Text
Loki ranting
Okay. I had this thought in my head of like just compiling links of all the Loki shit I've posted/reblogged so far so that when I get into a conversation about the show and how it fucking disgusted me, I can just be like "here. here's this masterlist post, go read all this shit. This is my entire argument, and not only mine, but a lot of stuff posted by people far more intelligent and level-headed and eloquent than I am, whom I happen to agree with." Because the alternative is constantly getting fired up all over again, and that is exhausting.
BUT! I'm stupid and don't know how tumblr works. Apparently I can't just be like "give me all the Loki-tagged shit I've got" I can only search all the Loki-tagged shit on all of tumblr. And I'm not scrolling back through all of my posts. I talk too fucking much for that shit 😂
So, I'll try to remember all of my grievances with how the MCU has treated Loki, and all of the excellent posts made by other, equally upset fans, and put it all together here under this nice, neat little cut for everyone else's sanity and scrolling convenience...
For people who actually read my shit fairly regularly - bless you, you crazy, patient people. I love you! - this is going to be a lot of repetition of shit you've already read. Probably at least twice. I'm passionate and I have a terrible memory lol. Sorry.
Anyway, first, for those who don't know me and haven't been following my explosions of rage for the past couple of months, some quick background: I do not read comic books, so Loki's Marvel comic canon means nothing to me. I know almost nothing about it. The reason I'm so in love with the character in the MCU is because I am an eclectic witch and the deity I've actively loved and worshiped the longest in my life (literally for as long as I can remember) is Loki. So when he was mentioned in The Mask, I squeed. When they named Matt Damon's character after him in Dogma, I cheered.
When Thor came out in 2011, I just about died from happiness. I was hungry for any representation of this underappreciated god, no matter what it was. I didn't even bitch about how underpowered he was, because at least he was there. But I'm getting slightly ahead of myself.
I can hear anyone reading this going "Why Loki? Isn't he, like, evil? Like basically the Norse version of The Devil?" Because I heard all this shit irl all the fucking time. And no. So let me give you a quick rundown of who Loki actually is.
Loki is a Trickster God. He's often referred to as the God of Mischief. He is not and never was evil, simply chaotic and hedonistic. Loki Laufeyjarson was the son of Laufey (that's mama; they changed her to a man for some reason in the movie) and Fárbauti. Right from the start, from his name, we get a sign of how Loki goes against traditional norms of the time, because in Norse culture, families were patrilineal, and surnames were "son/daughter of father" (which would have made him Loki Fárbautitason), not the mother. But Loki's surname is matrilineal. Feminist icon woo! lol
Though he's a Jotunn, Loki is counted among the Gods (Aesir) in Norse tradition. Depending on his mood, he is alternately helpful or disruptive to the other Gods. I'm not gonna sit and teach a whole text class on him lol but I'll use my favorite example of Misunderstood Loki - the conception of Sleipnir!
So, get this shit. This is also part of why I DO NOT follow Odin and never fucking will (a very small part, but still part of the reason). So, the other Norse Gods are petty motherfuckers, and they wanted some shit built but didn't want to pay the dude doing the building. So they were like "okay, if you can get it done in X amount of time, we'll pay you, but if you can't manage it NO MATTER WHAT, this whole thing is free." And they made sure he had NO help, nothing but him, his materials, and his Very Good Horsey. And this guy and his horse were fucking BAMFs. So it was looking like he was definitely gonna get it done in time, and Odin was like "nah, fuck that shit. I'm cheap." and so he sent Loki to distract the work horse. Loki transformed into a mare and lured the horse away, got fucked, got pregnant, gave birth to the 8-legged (for some reason) horse Sleipnir. Odin rides Loki's son into battle. Um. Kay.
So Loki helped Odin be a petty mf, and Odin got himself a new pet out of the deal.
Oh, also, because he's smart af and a shapeshifter and a master magician and genderfluid, Loki "fails" to fit the super fucking toxic and narrow Norse/Aesir view of "a real man". He prefers intelligence and manipulation to solve problems rather than violence, he's not afraid to behave like a clown if it gets shit done, and that grosses the Aesir out, so they constantly ridicule him for being "less than a man".
Loki is the God of the outcast and the misunderstood. The marginalized people from all walks of life. He is the God of the LGBT community. In modern terms, he's pansexual, polyamorous (married to Sigyn and they are deeply in love, but boy gets around and I've never seen any indication that Sigyn gives a shit) and genderfluid.
Okay. Focus, Ali. This is part of why I usually post multiple rants instead of one big long one XD The longer I ramble, the more I get sidetracked and forget the original point.
So. Loki's awesome, and being a Trickster, is powerful as all fucking hell. There's not much he can't do.
And now we come to Thor (the movie, not the deity). Loki's there! 24-year-old Ali is spazzing! All is right with the world!
Oh lord, they've actually done him justice?! Amazing! He's complex and nuanced and emotional, just like the real Loki! I loved this movie. Loved. It. The climactic thing with trying to blow up Jotunheim never really made much sense to me until someone made an excellent point the other day about Loki being raised in a racist society that was racist against his own race, he just didn't know it yet, poor child. Baby Thor was never corrected when he pledged to commit mass genocide, so Baby Loki probably absorbed the lesson then that Jotunns=evil and killing them all will win his father's love. Anyway, 2011 Loki was a beautiful, heartbreaking portrayal of the God I've loved all my life and spent 24 years longing to see depicted on the big screen.
Then The Avengers happened. And I saw another Loki very close to Norse mythology - mainly, how he's treated. In the beginning of the movie, he's sick, exhausted, and in pain. He can hardly stand, he stumbles and needs help when he walks. He was very obviously tortured, and the sickly blue light of the scepter's control is in his eyes. That gets less and less pronounced as the movie goes on, showing Loki working his way free of it, but in the beginning, he's a mess. Because he was tortured and used by Thanos. Marvel directly confirmed this, and that he was under the scepter's/Mind Stone's control. Loki's actions are not his own in The Avengers. He's under both threat and Thanos' direct control. The movie actually shows The Other directly threatening him to keep him on task, because this is not Loki's plan. It is not what he wants. He's being used and villainized... Just like in real life. It hurt to see this done to him, but the accuracy was too beautiful to ignore.
Thor: The Dark World comes out. I've heard people complain that this movie is the weak link in the Thor trilogy. I disagree. I think that's Ragnarok, for a bunch of reasons, but we'll get there. (And for the record, I loved Ragnarok, too. It was a funny movie. Infinity War and the Disney+ series are the only portrayals of Loki in the MCU that I truly fucking hated.) Anyway, good, fun movie. Had its faults, as all movies do, but it still followed Loki's real-life arc in a way. How? By having Loki dragged back to Asgard in chains and imprisoned underground. Again, not super happy that this happened to my love, and having to see it on screen was painful, but at least in the MCU he's not chained to a rock with venom dripping on his face for eternity, so there's that. (poor Sigyn. how tired do her arms get, holding up that bowl? best wife ever, amirite?)
In TDW, we're shown Loki's love for Frigga, who favored him and taught him magic as a child. We see his bravado; his attempts to mask his true feelings, especially grief. We see him slowly coming back to himself after the events of The Avengers, and slowly mending his relationship with his brother. He accepts that Odin will likely never love him, but Thor just might, because they were close when they were young. "I didn't do it for him." No, no my sweet, you did it for your brother, and a little out of guilt for what happened to your mother.
At the end, Loki fakes his death and escapes, taking the throne, and I have mixed feelings about this. Not the writer's choices here; I love that completely! A natural progression in Loki's story. But my joy is tainted by how closely they're following the Eddas now. Because Loki's escape from his prison heralds the beginning of Ragnarok. And Loki will die in Ragnarok. I don't want to see that play out in front of my face. I won't be able to handle the grief (spoiler alert! IW broke me. I almost walked out of the theater. Loki's death was legitimately fucking traumatic for me. I don't even care how pathetic that is. That grief was real, it was intense, and I still shake and cry when I think about it.)
Marvel announces that Thor 3 will be called Ragnarok. The internet treats this as a shocking revelation. I roll my eyes and mumble "duh" to myself and move on XD
Then they say Ragnarok will be a buddy comedy. I throw up a little in my mouth and no longer want to live on this planet. If they're going to make something called Ragnarok, could they at least treat it with even a fraction of the respect they've shown these characters thusfar? Jfc. I mean, I'll see it anyway, because I'm a whore for Tom Hiddleston lol. But come on, people!
I hated that they made Hel the long-lost older sister and Fenrir her fucking pet/attack dog. Those are my favorites of Loki's children! Hel is such an incredible badass that the early Christians named their dimension of eternal torture after her! They were terrified of her, to the point of naming the place that terrified them most after her. That's awesome! And Fenrir's just the best. I love wolves. Those two details, and Odin's retcon of "we're not Gods! ...lol, except your sister. she's totally a Goddess. and def gonna kill literally everything, so... good luck! byyyeeeee" pissed me off royally.
The rest was great. I genuinely liked this movie. Still do. And they finally used The Immigrant Song! That was pretty cool. If they'd thrown in Bring the Hammer Down and Thunderstruck, I might've called this movie perfect. XD
I wasn't totally in love with their portrayal of Loki in Ragnarok. Yes, the falling for 30 minutes line was funny, as was "I have to get off this planet" and "YES! That's how it feels!" And "Get Help" was funny as hell. But also, like... There is no way Loki would have been the dumb one in that first encounter with Hela. Also, he can teleport and project copies of himself and shit, so... He would not have been that desperate to go straight back to Asgard and bring her right along with them. Loki's not stupid. But whatever. Movie's gotta movie.
What I did love was seeing the slow mending of his relationship with Thor continuing, and the badass fighting on the bridge. I also loved that, like Real Loki, Movie Loki helped when help was needed, was quick and clever, and while he was carrying out the main plan, he was also planning ahead and grabbing the Tesseract. Yes, that drew Thanos right to them, but that's a whole other thing. Loki never would have left that thing on Asgard to be destroyed or lost.
And now Infinity War. Hooooly fucking shit. You know what? No. I'm not going into this. He was killed, years of character growth were erased forever, my heart fucking shattered. The end.
Endgame. IW hurt me so bad I didn't see Endgame until this year. I actually watched Civil War first (for context: I had actively avoided all Cap movies until this year because I fucking hate Steve Rogers. I find him insufferable. Did not realize what I was denying myself until I watched CW and finally saw the charms of Bucky. When he appeared in IW, I was so lost. XD I was like "...who dis? Murder Jesus?" also I just... didn't care. I was numb by then from crying through most of the movie over Loki)
So, anyway. Endgame. Loki picks up the Tesseract in alternate 2012, escapes, fans go "yay! he didn't actually die!" I go "yes he fucking did. Five years of his life, gone. Five years of growth and change, erased. Loki is dead. This will not be the same."
I was more right than I could have predicted. Now we come to the point of this rant. Sorry it took so long, but you were warned lol.
The Loki series makes me so angry I actually get sick to my stomach. It was fucking TRASH. When I praised Marvel for following Norse mythology so faithfully earlier? Yeah. I DID NOT MEAN TREAT HIM THE WAY THE OTHER GODS DID. I did not mean paint him as a pitiful clown, a joke, a caricature of who he truly was, with his pain and suffering played for LAUGHS.
This is supposed to be 2012 Loki, newly freed from Thanos' control. The Loki we saw in the beginning of TDW - snarky, exhausted, nihilistic. The Loki who rolled his eyes and said "get on with it" expecting to be killed.
The bumbling clown flipping on a dime from posturing to calling himself weak is not 2012 Loki. That is not ANY Loki. That is Tom Hiddleston in a black wig doing what he's told by a shitty writer who had no fucking idea what he was doing and was salty about his (bad) original script (for something totally fucking unrelated) getting killed.
In Episode 1, Loki is mocked, imprisoned, stripped against his will, tormented, belittled, and given a flippant summary of all the trauma Actual MCU Loki suffered that this one skipped out on, with no context, no acknowledgement of the trauma he's already lived quite fucking recently, and with the narrative twisted to not only erase all the abuse he's suffered, but to make it all his fault. And this is supposed to make him want to help these people?
And worse, IT FUCKING WORKS. WHAT?! I CAN'T- FUCKING WHAT?! Remember when I said LOKI IS NOT FUCKING STUPID?! So why is he STUPID?
Episode 2, he's a child. Mentally, this Loki is a fucking child. Now we've erased all the growth and development of his entire adult life. He's dopey, impatient, impulsive, desperate for a pat on the back and actually shows it. Yes, abused and neglected children crave the positive attention we never received, and we often grow up to be a bit emotionally stunted. But not all of us, and not Loki. Not as we've seen him EVER in the rest of the MCU. Playful and a bit callous at times? Absolutely! But not a big dumb fucking puppy.
Episode 3, a ray of hope, despite Sylvie! (I hate Sylvie) Loki casually admits he's pan/bi; labels never come up, but he admits to being with both men and women! He sings! Not really relevant to whether I approve of his portrayal or not lol but Tom has a beautiful voice, Norwegian ("Asgardian" lol) is a gorgeous, entrancing language, and I could watch that one bit on loop for eternity and never get bored. And then, finally, we see a glimpse - a glimpse - of Loki's power! He stops a falling building and pushes it right back up! Are we finally getting to see what he can really do? Will the next episode bring us Loki in all his glory?
Nope. 4 and 5 we see him mocked and pushed around and utterly irrelevant. Again. We see tiny reflections of what he could maybe theoretically do in other random Loki variants, but the "main" (lawl. main. it was the Sylvie and Mobius show. Loki was never the main anything.) Loki? Nothing. He wears his heart on his sleeve for no reason, bonds with the man who imprisoned, taunted, and gaslit him, is killed, and continues to be a moron and a joke. Always the clown. Always the dumb one. The one with the bad ideas. The inferior Loki.
Don't even get me started on that finale. I can't. This already took so much out of me. Fuck Marvel. Fuck this fucking show. I just... I'm done.
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makeste · 4 years
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if there is a timeskip, how far ahead do you think horikoshi will move along the story?
okay, so... I sat here for a while trying to work out how to phrase this less harshly lol, but I think I’m just gonna be blunt: I really, really hope that Horikoshi does not give us any kind of timeskip. there are precious few things that could potentially push me to quit this series, but a timeskip is one of them. I’m not saying that to be dramatic, I’m saying it just as a fact, because it’s happened to me multiple times before. in my experience, nothing else out there ruins a story as easily or effectively as a timeskip.
but let me try to break down and explain my loathing of them a bit more in depth.
1.) they make it so the audience misses out on character development. this is probably the thing I hate the most about timeskips. so here’s the thing; there are two different kinds of shounen timeskips. the type where the characters (mostly) stay together throughout the timeskip (think Naruto), and the type where the characters split apart during the timeskip (think One Piece). and I hate both of them equally, and let me explain.
I am reading the series because I am invested in the characters and their relationships. I want to see these relationships grow and evolve. timeskips make that impossible, because the whole point of a timeskip is that it skips right over everything so the audience doesn’t get to see it. and so, if the characters stay together during the timeskip, that’s a huge chunk of time during which their relationships are continuing to evolve, and the audience is missing out on all of that. that’s like starting a book and then finding that the entire middle section of it is blank. like, sorry about that, we decided this part wasn’t important enough to write down. if you’re lucky we might show you little bits and pieces of what happened during flashbacks, but otherwise you’ll just have to deal with it. boooo.
on the other hand, if the characters all go their separate ways to train on their own during the timeskip, then in a way that’s even worse. like yes, we’re technically not missing out on any relationship development, because no relationship development is even happening. those relationships are just put on hold for the duration of the timeskip. like, to use One Piece as an example, that means that the crew was together for like six months or however long, and then they all split apart for two whole years. they were apart for four times longer than they were ever together as a crew! like, you brought this found family together and bonded them so strongly only to rip them apart again?? for two years?? and for what! so that they could become boringly overpowered?? well, speaking of --
2.) they make fights predictable and/or disappointing. now for me, this one isn’t quite as bad as the character development one, but that’s mostly because I don’t care about fights as much. that said, post-timeskip fights are usually a dime a dozen, and I hate it. because here’s the thing: the whole purpose of the timeskip was to power up the character offscreen, so that they come back ready to kick more ass. which is great in theory, but in practice, post-timeskip fights tend to feature one of two brands of disappointment. either the protagonist character powered up so much that they easily win the fight, or else they still struggle even after all of that training and effort. the latter is just frustrating, because it’s like, so then what even was the point? but meanwhile, the former is also disappointing in its own way, because there’s no challenge anymore. yes it’s cool for like two seconds, but then what? if all I wanted was to watch someone reliably and effortlessly kick ass all day, I’d go become a fan of a bandwagon sports team. for me, the appeal of shounen is that the characters are learning and growing and struggling. if you make it easy for them then where’s the fun in that? if your character no longer faces any real obstacles then it stops being an interesting story.
and last but not least, 3.) they change the tone of the series (usually for the worse). so this one is interesting because this is one of the main reasons why a lot of people advocate for timeskips in the first place. ‘they help to make the series more mature’, or something along those lines. people are interested in seeing what kinds of storylines would open up with an older, more experienced cast of characters.
except that when people say more mature, what they usually mean is one of two things. either more romance, or else darker/grittier story content (read: more character deaths). which, just speaking personally, I have approximately zero interest in either of those things. if I wanted a grimdarker shounen series I’d be reading Attack on Titan instead. if I wanted more romance, I would read... well actually don’t really know what I’d read lol, because that’s kind of the point I’m trying to make here -- I don’t read romance, because I’m not interested in it (insert aromantic disclosure here). as an element of a more complex story, sure, that’s fine. but as a focus, I’d just as soon not. nine times out of ten I will lose interest in it. that’s 100% a personal preference there of course, but yeah.
anyways, but the point is, I started reading this coming of age story about teenagers at a superhero academy because I like coming of age stories! I like reading about younger characters and their adventures, learning about themselves and the world around them, making mistakes and getting stronger and the like. this is a specific genre that has a specific appeal to me. there’s an idealism and an optimism inherent in it, and I really don’t want the series to go changing that up. especially if there’s no need to change it up. which imo there really isn’t. as it stands, BnHA is already an unexpectedly mature story in a lot of ways, and it’s already exploring a lot of darker and more complex themes as it is, and doing an excellent job of it imo. basically, if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. most of the time you’ll just end up ruining what was so appealing about the series to begin with.
so yeah! thus concludes my impromptu rant post about timeskips lol, and I’ll just belatedly add in a disclaimer as well that this is just my own opinion of course, and ymmv. but for me personally, I think that shounen series in particular rarely come out better after a timeskip (in fact I can’t think of any off the top of my head to tell the truth). also in BnHA’s case I really don’t think there’s any need for one at all. maybe if we get another short one, like the three-month timeskip that took place just before the start of this arc. but even then, there is just so much going on currently in the manga that it would feel weird to just fast-forward through it. TomurAFO is still on the loose. Dabi just blew up hero society as we know it. All Might is prophesized to die in the near future. the entire Billboard Top Ten was pretty much wiped out. and so on and so forth, and that’s not even getting into all of the character development that recently took place.
it just feels like things are too chaotic right now to skip ahead very far. I want to see what’s going to happen in the immediate aftermath of all this. and I don’t feel like the villains will leave the heroes alone to recover for very long. like, I can’t really figure out where someone would even put a timeskip, I guess is what I’m saying? there’s nowhere that feels natural. I could see them skipping a few weeks ahead maybe, but no more than that. anything more, and one has to assume that Tomura simply comes back to wipe out the rest of the heroes and/or the world lol. unless they shove him into another cryotube or something, I suppose.
so yeah, I think we’ll either get a very short timeskip or none at all. at least I am keeping my fingers crossed for as much. I don’t think it needs to happen or should happen. again, ymmv, but at any rate that’s my answer.
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mashiraostail · 4 years
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Hiiii, i was wondering if i could request some vlad king and gang orca taking care of their s/o pets. Like if the reader was out of town and asked them to take care of their dogs👉👈 i feel like vlad is such a good doggy dad that the dogs play together and i feel like gang orca would be lost but doing his best and if he was taking care of a cat i like to think it would love being around him because cats love fish and he would just always have his s/o cat cuddling on his lap. Im sorry for ranting lol i love your work you're doing great💕
awwehehe this is so cute since you mentioned dogs for vlad and cats for kugo that's what i went with! also indulged myself and included kugo/ jiro/shoji content bc that seems like such a GOOD FUNNY AND WHOLESOME trio and i wanted more content than we got smh 
Sekijiro Kan/Vlad King: "Hey Sek, I need a huge favor.” You look up from your phone at the taller man who is currently scrunched into the corner of his couch scrutinizing a piece of paper with really terrible handwriting on it.  “Sounds dangerous.” He replies without looking up and you snort dropping to the cushion beside him.  “Only a little, but I think you’re good for it.”  “Alright then, so what’s the favor?” His eyes flick up to you. “I need to go visit a friend out of town.” You sigh, “she had a baby last month, I used to work with her husband and she asked if I wanted to spend some time back home with her for her birthday next week, I should be about five days.” You rest your hands on his knees, “so while I’m out there..would you mind watching Kilo for me? I hate to leave him behind but It’d be a pain to travel so far with him I know he hates trains.”  “That’s a huge favor?” He raises an eyebrow at you, “sure I can watch him. I bet they’ll get along fine.” He glances at his own dog curled up under a chair.  “But only If you can figure out what the hell Monoma tried to write here.”  For all intents and purposes, Kilo was a good dog, a little stupid, but a good dog nonetheless. To be honest, he’s really honored you trust him with the task, you’re the only person he’s met that seems to love your own dog as much as he loves his. Plus it also meant that Kilo had to like him a fair bit which was also a relief, as a dog owner he knew any potential partner was only as compatible with him as they were with his dog, and his dog loved you, he was sure you felt the same way, any partner that Kilo didn’t get along with would be impossible for you to get along with, he found it more than a little reassuring that Kilo seemed to enjoy his company. Past all that, and maybe even most important this was a perfect opportunity to introduce the two dogs. He was sure it was no secret to you but this wasn’t exactly a casual fling, with the way things were going it felt pretty inevitable that he’d ask if you wanted to move in together; but if the two didn’t get along well then..that’d be an issue. Though he was sure if things got tested out now you’d have some time to at least try to get the dogs to be comfortable with each other or hopefully think of some sort of workaround. In his eyes, this was a blessing for him as much as it was a favor to you.  “Are you sure you don’t mind keeping Kilo at your place?” Sekijiro is slightly embarrassed to say how early he arrived at this park, he wanted to tire his own dog out before introducing the pair, he’d advised you to do the same so you were walking to the park, you'd called him on your way.  “Of course I don’t mind babe.” He tosses a ball from his seat on the bench and watches his pudgy bulldog trot over to it, “it’ll be easier this way, right?”  “Yeah that’s true, I just don’t want Kilo wrecking any of your stuff, he always means well but he gets into trouble sometimes-”  “Don’t worry about it, he’ll be a model student by the time you get back.” He hears you laugh into the receiver at that. “I don’t doubt that, I’m almost there, I’ll see you in a few okay?”  “Yeah sure thing, can’t wait.” You huff out another laugh at him before hanging up.  “Sekijiro!” You chirp brightly at the sight of the man, he’s too busy taking you in to respond. Kilo’s trotting a foot or so in front of you on his leash, that old joke about dogs looking reminiscent of their owners was certainly true in your case, you both looked delighted to see him and beyond that, you were practically glowing... Maybe he just had a thing for people who were good with animals.  “Hey Sek?” You lean down in front of him.  “Hey! He welcomes Kilo between his knees, the mixed breed was a bit larger than his dog who was currently bounding back to him with a ball and sufficient slobber hanging from his mouth, the size difference in mind though Kilo was a hell of a lot less bulky, he was practically streamlined, Sekijiro had seen how fast the dog could run with his own eyes. He could see why you took so much pride in the dog, he was definitely beautiful his coat was long, wavy, and shiny and he had big blue eyes and admittedly the cutest pink nose and spotted tongue Sekijiro had ever seen.  “Thanks so much again for doing this I really-” An excited bark pulls your attention downwards, “look who it is!” You sing, crouching down to pet the panting dog, “you sure look tired. Sekijiro is working you too hard.” You frown at him as he hops up to rest his front paws on your thighs. “Don’t be ridiculous.” Sekijiro laughs, “but he is worn out, I guess Kilo is too though.” Kilo’s head is on his knee, the larger dog is panting too.  They seem to notice each other, and approach with a lazy curiosity. They sniff around each other for a bit but after that return to their respective activities, seemingly unbothered by each other and the proximity of the other dog to their owner. Kilo didn’t mind your cooing at Vlad’s dog who didn’t seem to mind Kilo’s head in his owner's lap. With that little bit of reassurance, you hand him Kilo’s leash and a bag of his stuff; food dish, some toys and treats and the like, and then you part ways after promising to call him when you get to your home town safely.  All in all the coming days are pretty uneventful, Kilo joins them on their daily walks, eats at the same time with no trouble, finds a comfortable place to sleep each night.  “Is Kilo alright?” Your voice is nervous in the receiver.  “He’s better than babe, seriously they’re getting along great.”  “God that’s such a relief.” You sigh, “the pictures you’ve sent are cute..gosh I miss him.” You pout a little. “Gee I miss you too babe.” He mutters it with a playful edge to his voice and you gasp,  “I was going to say I miss you too but forget it!”  “don’t be mean!” He complains back, “I was kidding! And anyway I miss you. How’s it been out there?”  You go off on your usual tangents before ending up back at square one.  “Oh! I called you for a reason actually!” You remember, “I’ll be a little bit late getting back on Sunday, one of the trains is going to be down so I’m taking a later one, I should be back around midnight now would you mind-”  “Of course not babe, I’ll get you from the station so-”  “No no! It’s okay you’ve already done so much that’s not what I was going to ask! I just wanted to be sure you wouldn’t mind keeping Kilo around for the extra time...I can get a taxi, seriously don’t wait up for me!”  “Well just come to my place when you get back right?”  “I wouldn’t wanna wake you up-”  “It’s been way too long since I saw you last, so I don’t mind, if you won’t let me pick you up from the station at least come right here.”  “You’re convincing.” You laugh a little, embarrassment heating up your face, “I guess that’s fine with me then...” A distant sounding voice pulls you away from the receiver, “Sek I have to go, I’ll call you again soon though!”  “Don’t worry about anything babe.” He reassures you as you hang up.  There is one minor spat over a rope toy but it’s resolved easily enough and the pair seem to get on swimmingly after that, even sharing a couch cushion and occasionally resting their heads on each other, they become incredibly fast friends, which is probably the biggest relief on the planet to Sekijiro. Watching the two of them play tug of war in his living room or witnessing their schemes to get leftovers off the counter on Thursday night essentially cement his vision of a future with you.  If you were being totally honest it was embarrassing how attractive you found Sekijiro getting along with your dog to be, you’d never got the obsession of handsome guys holding cute babies but seeing some of the photos he’d sent to you over the almost 6 days you were gone made butterflies crop up in your stomach the likes of which you’d only felt when he was actively trying to fluster you...but this seemed totally unintentional. To say you were incredibly eager to go home and see him (jump his bones) felt like an understatement. It’s past midnight when you get back and the place is mostly dark, you see a vaguely bulldog shaped blob partially under a blanket on the couch, but the snoring it emits gives away it’s identity easily. You leave your bag at the door and venture into the apartment, poking your nose into the bedroom.  Of course, Sekijiro is there, dead asleep on his back, and who’s with him but Kilo, his head resting on the blood hero’s chest one of his hands resting on top of it.  “Oh Vlad-” You coo, you practically sing it at him.  “Wha-whatsitwhat-” He rubs his face as he picks his head up, “oh, hey welcome back ‘s good to see you, missed you-”  “You’re so sweet-” You’re already at the side of his bed, leaning down and kissing him.  “What’s-” Sekijiro takes a minute to process everything before he realizes it’s Kilo’s head on his chest making you act like this.  “Oh no way, he’s been a total angel-”  “I’m so glad he likes you so much-” You murmur it between kisses, to his lips and various other spots on his cheeks and jaw, “you guys are adorable together.”  “I’m glad you think so-” He cuts himself off with a yawn and turns into your lips, kissing you again before speaking, “you weren’t kidding about that late train huh? It’s almost 1 AM, you must be exhausted, there’s plenty of room for you in here so come on.” 
Kugo Sakamata/Gang Orca: “Hey, Kugo...” You approach him from behind and wrap your arms around his shoulders, leaning against the back of the chair he’s sat in.  “Yes?” One hand comes up to cover your forearm the other stays dutifully at work.  “You love me, right?” You rest your head against his and he pricks up at the inquisition.  “Of course I do, why would you ask a question like that? Is something wrong?”  The way his hand subtly squeezes your arm isn’t lost on you.  “Hmm..no nothing's wrong.” You lean into him and close your eyes as he sighs good-naturedly. “Then what? Did you just want to hear me say it?” He leans back into you, “I guess I could entertain that...” His thumb swipes a long stroke over the skin of your forearm, “I love you, dear.” He can feel you prickle up at that behind him. “I love you too Kugo.” You squeeze him tighter and he huffs out a quiet laugh. “I’m glad to hear it. Now is that all you needed?” He puts his pen down to bring his other hand up to your arms, “I’m a bit busy. You’re welcome to stay there if you like though I just need to finish some paperwork and make a few phone calls. After that, we can do whatever you like for the night.”  “Well, now that you mention it there was just one more thing. I’ll be fast I promise.” Your hand slides underneath his lapel and into his jacket.  “Don’t worry I can make a bit of time for you then, what’s the matter?” You make eye contact with him through his darkened computer screen.  “My boss invited me to this big conference next week, it’s a pretty great opportunity and I could meet some important people..” You explain, biting your lip, “it could be really good for me to branch out even she thinks so, and getting some more experience will be great, and it’s pretty close to my hometown so I figured I'd stop in and see some old friends after I got done..It’d be about 5 or so days and I’d really like to go.” You sigh and he seems more than a little confused based on his reflection.   “That does sound like a great opportunity for you, you’re right..what’s the problem then? Do you need advice about something?” His confusion doesn’t quell even as you kiss his temple. “I probably will later but for now the problem is Luna.” “Your cat?” Kugo piques, “why is she a problem?”  You sigh, “if I’m not around no one will be there to feed her and make sure she stays out of trouble.”  “Oh is that it? That’s no problem at all dear, I can look after her for you. Is that what you were going to ask me?”  “You don’t mind?” You perk up, “I don’t want to trouble you...and I know I could just as easily leave a key under my mat and have a neighbor do it but I trust you so much more and-”  “It’s no trouble, really.” Kugo laughs a little, "I pass by your apartment all the time on patrols, I’m sure the interns won't mind if I make a stop and head up to check on her every now and again.”  “Oh! You can totally bring them up if they like cats!” He laughs at that too.  “Was that all?”  “Mhm.” You nod and use the motion to nestle into him a bit, “Thank you Kugo.”  ”It’s really my pleasure. Leave it to me, alright?”  All things considered, Kugo’s also pretty honored to be trusted with the task of watching your pet cat, he knows how much you love and worry about her, you dote on her all the time, and if the copious amount of photos you send him of her say anything she’s definitely your pride and joy. For the most part, you spent the bulk of your time with Kugo at his own home, due largely to the fact that he was larger than average and he existed a fair bit more comfortably there, but he paid you visits in your apartment from time to time and had met the cat, she seemed to like him plenty which was a relief as well.  You stop at Kugo’s before you leave and give him a list of things to double-check when he stops in, though you reassure him that there shouldn’t be any problems, Luna was pretty independent and mellow she didn’t like going outside so he didn’t have to worry about her escaping or anything like that. He tries to stop in at least 3 times a day, before, during, and after patrols, he knows that’s probably overkill, you spend all day at work and have never had an issue but he hates the idea of something happening to the feline on his watch. Plus even if he wouldn’t readily admit it he saw this as a perfect time to get on the cat's good side, you said she already loved him but he wasn’t convinced. He knew how much you loved her and any vision of your future that he had always featured the mellow feline so in his mind it was imperative they got on well. On top of that, he was glad you trusted him with something as small and delicate as Luna, she fits pretty comfortably in his hand and was as fragile as she was petit, but you never seemed off-put by the idea of him holding her or petting her, in fact, you encouraged it. The way you even wanted him near her when you weren’t around to supervise put him at ease about his strength and size, he always worried about breaking delicate things, but that wasn’t a worry you seemed to echo.  “Is something going on in that building?”  Shoji looks up at your complex as he pauses by it, “you’re stopping here a lot since yesterday.”  “Huh? Oh. Actually no... well nothing of importance to you. I’m...catsitting.” Jiro holds her breath the hold in the laugh, “Catsitting?”   “Yes...my partner is away at a work conference, the cat in question is theirs.” Kugo nods, “if you like cats you can come up and meet her, she’s actually quite friendly.”   Kugo was pretty used to Luna at this juncture, but whenever other people met her it was easy to see why you were so proud of her, she was quite the stunning cat, a long dark grey and black coat with big green eyes and a swishing tail, her paws were colored as if she was wearing boots.  “Wow...she’s really pretty, I’ve never seen a cat like this.” Jiro was crouched on the ground, stroking her neck.  “I was surprised too.” Kugo confesses, “they found her in a box on the side of the road about a year before we met. She was only a kitten then. Her name’s Luna.”  She seemed to like the pair equally alternating between them, rubbing against their legs and shuffling her head into their palms.  “She is very friendly.” Shoji remarks as she purrs at him, attempting to climb into his lap.  “She’s good at getting into trouble, but she usually means well. You can stay with her for a minute.” He sets off to double-check the usual; food, water, litterbox, the loose window that she’s always wiggling open despite having no desire to climb out of it, he waters a few plants and straightens up anything she knocked over as well. When he returns she's overturned on Shoji’s lap.  “You’re getting along well.” He swipes a pillow she’d knocked over up and replaces it on the couch.  “She’s really sweet!” Jiro is scratching her stomach. “I’m glad to hear it.”   “Hey..sorry if this is too personal or whatever but I didn’t know you were.. dating someone... We didn’t snoop or anything though!” She swears, holding both hands up, the cat looks disgruntled at the loss of attention.  “It’s alright I trust you.” Kugo waves her off, “Luna looks too comfortable anyways, you’ve clearly been petting her this whole time.” He adds with a small chuckle. At the sound of her name, she rolls over and winds around his feet, circling through his ankles and pawing at his pants until he lifts her up.  “To answer you though yes I am seeing someone.” He holds Luna with one hand, his ring and middle finger scratching the patch of grey fur on her chest.  “Are they a hero too?” She wonders, straightening up.  “No...no they’re not, I’m not very public about this sort of thing.”  Shoji contemplates that, “they have a nice apartment.”  “That is true, it’s a good job, and they do have a pretty keen eye for decorating” He agrees, looking around amicably.  “Have you guys been together for a long time?” Jiro blurts out before feeling color float up to her cheeks, “sorry I don’t mean to be rude... I just never pictured you like this I guess I’m curious-”  “It’s okay, most people don’t, and yes, we’ve been together a while now.” Kugo raises a hand to calm her, “but like I said before I’m not very public about things like this which is why you wouldn’t have heard..though either way, even when we do go out together... most people don’t assume I do that sort of thing, and to be frank, we aren’t the most...visually compatible pair..” He says that with a distinct fondness in his voice and then continues, “like you said, you don’t really picture me in this sort of light, most people don’t so hero gossip tabloids tend to leave me alone for the most part, I get a fair bit of freedom when it comes to this sort of thing because of that. There are probably plenty of photos of us together out there, though people usually assume they’re my manager or a secretary or just a friend.” Luna is purring loudly in his hand, her body largely slack against his chest. He walks her over to the couch and sets her down, which she warbles angrily at, “to be honest though I prefer it this way. I’m a private person.”  “That makes sense...well, their cat sure likes you.” Shoji points and Kugo chuckles.  “I’m fond of her myself.” Kugo admits, “everything is as it should be here so we can head out again, sorry for the tangent.” He scratches Luna’s neck and sighs, “as for you I’ll be back tonight. So try to behave until then, for my sake alright?”  Jiro tries not to laugh at the sight. “I didn’t think you’d actually bring them up! Did they like her?”  You sound delighted about it over the phone that night.  “I may have knocked a few intimidation points off of myself, but yes they thought she was cute.” He was sitting with her, contemplating staying the night here. He was embarrassed to say it but this was the longest you’d spent apart in a while and despite any appearances, he had gone soft and was starting to miss you, being around your stuff was nice even if he didn’t fit too well in your bed.  “I don’t think you’re very intimidating at all.” You peep back thoughtlessly. “Well, I’d sure hope not.” He chuckles and leans against the couch, “she’s been good too I was,..expecting her to break more.”  Truthfully Kugo wasn’t sure what he was expecting, he never had pets growing up and hero work didn’t give much free time to consider one, it took a day to get comfortable with her, and even now he was watching his every step for her. “I’m glad to hear that!” You laugh, “she’s a pretty great cat isn't she?”  “I have to agree..” Kugo wouldn’t mind having her around all the time, the longer he sat on your couch and contemplated it the more he realized he wouldn't mind having the both of you around all the time. Was this some sort of emotional sign to ask you to stay with him? He’d give that more thought at a later date.  “Kugo are you listening?” “Of course I am.” He was not. You don’t seem perturbed though, chuckling and then sighing fondly, “I’m gonna go shower then call it a night, I miss you two though.”  Kugo looks down at the cat on his lap and he nods, “we miss you too. I’ll be up for a bit longer so call or text me if you need anything.”  “You shouldn’t stay up so late Kugo it’s bad for you-”  “I know, I know, I’ll turn over a new leaf when you get back.”  “Sure you will.” You snort, “I love you Kugo.”  “I love you too, I’ll see you soon.”  You wanted to see Kugo first thing when you got back but you were so exhausted that you can’t help sulking to your own place, things had gone well enough but all the commotion and travel really drained you. You were sure it wasn’t anything spending some time or even a night with Kugo couldn’t fix though. When you shoulder your door open though there’s Kugo, sitting on your couch.  “Kugo, you’re here?” He’s holding some papers in one hand, the other is holding Luna’s back, keeping her against his chest.  “I was just checking in on her but every time I tried to leave she started..making a weird noise.”  “Weird like how?” You chuckle, suddenly feeling much better.  “Sort of like screaming. But cat-like. I sat down and she clawed her way up here, then fell asleep and almost fell off, but I caught her and she hasn’t moved since.”  “And... how long ago was that?”  “What time is it?” “Half-past 6.”  “2 hours ago. I didn’t want to wake her.”  “Kugo.” You laugh and sit beside him, “you’re so sweet.” You wrap both of your arms around one of his and lean into his shoulder, “I missed you so much.”  “I missed you too.” Kugo sets the papers down on the pile by the arm of the couch, “It's sort of embarrassing but I even stayed here a few nights because of it. I can’t remember the last time I went even 2 days without seeing you.” He appreciates the way you seem to melt into him at that.  “That’s not embarrassing it’s sweet, you’re so cute Kugo...” You lean up and kiss him, “such a big softie aren’t you?”  A soft hum is his reply as you pull away, “was she any trouble? Be honest.” “I was worried at first that I’d screw it up somehow but it went fine.” He confesses as he lifts the cat off his chest and she’s sleepy and limp in his big hand, purring contentedly.  “She was acting up the 2nd day but I think she was just confused about not seeing you. Then she got used to me and was alright.”  “That’s cute..” You yawn and clamber onto his lap, “god all that traveling tired me out...you’ve been stuck here for 2 hours but I might have to trap you a little longer to take a catnap of my own. I think Luna’s onto something...” You nestle into his shoulder, grateful to feel his arms come around you.  “Don’t worry about me.” He hums as Luna curls up in the sliver of space between your bodies, “I just want to finish reading over some things. Then I'll bring you both to bed.”  “You’ll stay tonight?” You yawn again and he hums, you can tell he’s smiling even though you can’t see him. “Would you like me to?”  You nod into his shoulder, “yeah, I would...”  “Alright then I will. Now go to sleep, you need it.” 
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jksofficialwifey · 4 years
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Royal Spies and Everything Nice
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Summary: It's hard being a princess who's also an undercover spy, but with the help of your rival and sort of boyfrienemy Prince Jeon, maybe you'll make it through alive.
Tags & warnings: fluff, angst, some violence, just beware- jk. Rivals2luvers, some shrek characters make an appearance cos i smoke cracK das wut i smoke. Smut in the end, a lil cussing etc.
Pairing: Jungkook x Reader
Commissioned for @nochusyn 💋 tysm for being so patient ilyyy and im so happy i didn't d13 so i could finish this! Shsh xx (if y'all wanna commission me just message me here on tumblr!)
Wc: 10k+++
A/N: I almost di3d writing this so pls read it n check it out char- begging? Lol jk. But fr, I was so sick with 39.5 fevers and I didn't even know when i would finish it but I'm so happy I finally did today! This is also like a late jk bday present. Ily all and JK always! 💜
Once upon a time in the futuristic land of Royalea, a secret spy academy was made for royals to train and become professional spies. After years of suffering from invaders and having their kin kidnapped and slain by the same invader rebels, the royals wanted to put a stop to it all, they wanted to protect their children, their future heirs.
They had learned from their past mistakes and devised a plan to become stronger. They strictly trained their children at a young age to help in preparing them to face all kinds of enemies. So that when the time comes, they will be able to protect themselves. They won't be the ones cowering in fear, feeling helpless and begging for mercy at the hands of their enemies.
They will be the ones invading other lands and eradicating anyone who threatens to come in their way. That is how they innovated their land. With their newfound courage and mindset. Within just a few years of establishing the academy, they had the latest gadgets and technology the neighboring countries would envy. Their princes and princesses trained brilliant in combat. To them, it didn't make their heirs any less poised and graceful just because they knew how to fight. Those times are done, and they knew what was most important having witnessed the chaotic events that happened before.
Although most of them thought that- not everyone did. A few royals still wanted to live the traditional way, they preferred to raise their royal children by the book and with grace, as they say. They reasoned that their heirs' responsibilities were to lead a land, not play as guards. They were curious about the superb technology their land had now, but they limited their use of it. Your parents were one of those traditional royals.
The queen was about to enjoy the morning's prepared feast, when she caught you in the corner of her eye wearing a cloak heading for the door. You were probably planning to sneak out before breakfast again. "Y/N, come back here dear. You were trying to sneak out again right? Where have you been running off to these days? I hope it's not where I think it is, because I've told you not to go there-" The queen had ranted but you cut her off. "It's not where you think it is okay? But even if it was, why won't you let me go anyway? How will I be safe If I don't know how to defend myself?"
"You know why we forbid you to go to that place. You're safer here. You don't need to become a brute to be safe. That's why there are guards to protect you, you have your own knight Hoseok to protect you-" The queen rambled and explained only to be interrupted by you again. "Well I don't want to just rely on the guards and my knight, your majesty. I wanna be able to protect myself whenever and wherever. You say I'm safer here, but you can't always assure that. I don't know why you won't just let me be a-" It was the queen's turn to interrupt you, "And I don't know why you keep on insisting to disrespect and disobey me. Don't finish that sentence or you'll regret it princess. Actually, If you won't listen to me then maybe you'd be better off inside your room the whole day. Guards, please escort Princess Y/N to her room and make sure she doesn't leave the palace."
"This is so unfair! Why are you doing this to me?" You exclaimed. "You know why, my child. It's because I only want to keep you safe. I'm doing this for you so don't dare to disobey me again, or you might have to stay in your tower for a year again." The queen warned. You didn't bother to retort anymore, it was futile.
You were bored, your breakfast was sent to your room but you didn't have the appetite to eat. You were supposed to be assigned to a new mission today, it just sucks that your mother had seen you on the way out. All of it sucked. This castle you're in, your mother, (though you loved her deeply, she can sometimes be so difficult and strict.) everyone on this planet, Prince Jeon, wait… Jeon Jungkook. That's it! Maybe if his panties aren't in a twist today- maybe he can help you get out. It won't hurt to try though, so that's what you decided to do. You took your phone and messaged him.
To Agent 🐰: 9:18 am
Hey bunny I need your help.
To Agent 🦊 princess: 9:19 am
And why should I help you? 🤔
To Agent 🐰: 9:20 am
Because I'm stuck here and I can't fight you if I can't get out. So come here and get me 😜
To Agent 🦊 princess: 9:21 am
Touché. But what's the magic word princess? 😉 you need to say it.
To Agent 🐰: 9:22 am
Ughh. Fr? Fine. Pls help me my furry prince and hurryyyy.
To Agent 🦊 princess: 9:23 am
I'm otw my princess. And for the Nth time I told you I'm not a furry!
Jungkook arrived to the palace after a while, the queen was always delighted to see his presence. "Prince Jungkook, It's a pleasure to see you. If you don't mind me asking, what brings you here today?" the queen inquired. "It's a pleasure to see you too your majesty. I actually came here to see Princess Y/N, is she busy?" Jungkook said albeit knowing you were stuck in your room.
"Oh not really. Let me ask the maids to get her for you."
"Um, if you don't mind your majesty, I can just go into her room myself. If that's okay?" Jungkook asked. "Of course that's okay dear. You know where her room is right?" Jungkook nodded.
Jungkook was taking a little too long, you thought. If only you had another choice, you wouldn't conspire with that annoying prince. After a few seconds, you heard someone knocking on your door. Could it be him? "Jungkook is that you?" you inquired. "No, I'm not Jungkook miss. I'm just your friendly neighborhood spiderman." you opened the door and there stood the handsome ebony haired prince. "Spiderman your ass, what took you so long? I've been waiting here for ages!" You whined. "Sorry princess, I did try to hurry a little for you. Anyway, what's the plan?" The prince said as he sat and made himself comfortable in your bed.
"Hmm. I was thinking maybe you could convince my mother to let me go out with you today," You looked at him directly, trying to convey what your plan is with your eyes. "Even though I'm supposed to be grounded. Maybe you could tell her that we're gonna practice archery, or we're gonna conquer other lands, whatever just do your thing. As gross as it is and I don't know why but, she's quite fond of you so- help me get out of here." Jungkook stares at you and notices how your long brown wavy hair falls over your face. He always thought your hairstyle matched perfectly to your face. You were actually kind of perfect to him. But he'll never tell you that of course, even if you or someone threatened to kill him.
"And what do I get by helping you princess?" He smirked. He loved teasing you and making you irritated, he thought it was kind of cute how your face would turn red from anger after he irritated the shit out of you and when you get flustered. Everytime he teased you he couldn't help but think you were sort of cute. "You can get the satisfaction of me letting you get more points on the top spies leaderboard." You replied smartly.
"As if you'd let me do that without chewing my ear off. Please give me something that's actually factual."
"Fine. Hmm, how about me promising not to insult you for a week even if you annoy the hell out of me?" You suggested smiling a little manipulatively at him. "Eh, that's lame. How about you do me a dare and maybe I'll agree to your planposal." He retorted and smirked arrogantly. You hated when he smiled like that, he's always so cocky and just because he looked handsome as hell- not that you'll admit it out loud ever, doesn't mean you'll fall for his insufferable cute ass. Wait did you just say handsome and cute? Ew. You meant evil. Yes that's what you meant… Anyway.
"Please don't say planposal ever again," You rolled your eyes at him. "Regardless, it depends on what the dare is. If you want me to run around naked and flash the whole kingdom then that's not gonna happen baby." You told him strictly.
"Don't worry princess, as satisfying that concept is for me, I don't wanna be the cause of blindness and curse the whole land." What the heck did he mean? Did he just insult me? "Whatever, Jeon. Just tell me what you want." You demanded.
"I want you." What? Did his last tiny brain cell die and now he's talking nonsense?
"What?" you replied flustered by his weird statement.
"I want you to do this mission for me. That's my dare. Why are you flustered though? Did you think about something else?" He taunted and smirked again, It's like he never stops being cocky when he's around you.
"Of course not. I'm not delusional like you. And what mission is it that you can't seem to do it yourself? Is Prince Jeon a little scared?"
"I'm not scared. It's just no fun to do it myself when I can have my princess to do it for me. That's my condition though if you want me to help you get out of here. I'll help you escape, and you'll help me when you're out. Is it a deal?"
"Hmm, tell me what mission is it and maybe I'll agree." You proposed. "You'll know when you do it, so I'm not telling you right now. Also, I want you to do another little thing for me." He grinned evilly. You have a feeling you're gonna hate him even more for what he's about to make you do. Nevertheless you agreed, if that meant he'd help you get away from your mother today. [INSERT PIC]
You were finally able to get out of the palace thanks to Jeon Jungkook's annoying face. You don't know how he charmed your mother, but at least she bought the act that the two of you were practicing your archery skills. You got what you wanted, but at the cost of your ego. You couldn't believe you actually praised Jeon Jungkook in public and embarrassed yourself on social media. Anyhow, the two of you were now on the way to the academy riding your respective monocycles. (the ones the guys in Men in Black used to ride, if you've seen the movie.)
It didn't take long for you to arrive, and before the other royal spies could see that you two came together, you already told Jungkook to maintain some distance beforehand, and act as if you didn't just hangout awhile ago.
You parked your monocycle and just as you were about to go inside the academy, you noticed how Jeon Jungkook gathered the attention of some girls and even boys too. Maybe it was the way his hair still looked perfect and fluffy in the wind, or the way he walked so gracefully just how a prince should. Either way, you couldn't deny how popular he was. He was every prince/princess' dream guy. No one could resist him, and maybe you couldn't too, maybe that's why you loathe him a lot.
In Prince Jungkook's defense, it wasn't his fault he was born so damn beautiful. He didn't pretend that he didn't notice the stares and the attention people gave him. But he also wasn't so cocky about it. He was still quite humble if he might say, and he was a shy guy too. He didn't actually care about everyone's attention, well maybe except one. It was still confusing to him how you always thought he was cocky because he was popular, as if you weren't cocky and popular too? He wondered if you noticed the other princes gawking at you when you walk by, or the insecure princesses rolling their eyes because they can't be you. You weren't even just a princess, you were one of the best spies in the academy too.
You were practicing your knife throwing skills when you noticed a presence beside you.
"Go on continue, don't mind my gorgeous presence here." He said.
"What are you doing here Jeon? And what do you want? I'm busy," you retorted. "I just wanted to remind you about our deal princess. The mission I want you to do, it's at 1800. Just wanted you to be ready."
"I'm always ready Jeon."
"I know but you might need a good luck from me personally for this one, that's why I came to see you before you go. Good luck my princess, be safe." He said and left you wondering if the mission was truly as dangerous as he hinted.
It turned out that the mission was quite harder than you expected. You had to overthrow a mad king, but not just any mad king- he was a retired superspy too. It didn't help that his army were giant killer robots, and although you've trained at a young age, it was still a little difficult to defeat them alone. You understand now why Jungkook made you do this mission, it was a trap.
That insufferable prince- he'll see when you get out of this hell hole, if you get out of here alive he'll really get his ass kicked. "Ballsacks!" you cursed as you barely dodged the laser beam the giant robot just shot at you. You were debating now if you should call reinforcements but you didn't wanna lower your pride for him even more. You didn’t wanna give him the satisfaction of knowing you're failing this mission.
Just as you thought you were gonna get crushed by one of the ginormous robots- to your surprise, the nasty thing got blown into bits.
"I knew these bubblegum bombs would come in handy someday," the voice spoke. "It's really unprofessional of you to leave your gadgets behind princess. You should be thankful I decided to bring them here to you." Of course it was the insufferable agent rabbit.
"What are you doing here Jeon?" you inquired rudely.
"What does it look like I'm doing Y/N? I'm saving your ass from getting killed." he retorted, and you were taken aback when he called you by your first name. It was a rule that agents should call each other by their codenames, you wondered if he forgot about that. "How dare you call me by my name! You know that isn't allowed. Call me by my codename you idiot, and I don't need you to save me, I can save myself thank you very much." You retorted.
"You called me by my name first! Whatever, and sure you can, you were obviously not about to get crushed just five minutes ago. I didn't even get a sincere thanks from you 'cause in case you forgot, just like how you forgot your gadgets, I saved you princess." he said snarkily. "Well, I didn't ask you to, but fine thanks a lot! I'm so grateful you saved me. Happy now?" So what if he saved your ass this time, it's not like he saved the world? And you were only in this predicament because of him anyway. This was his mission and he made you do it, maybe it was your fault for underestimating the mission hence, you only brought a few gadgets- but that's not even such a big deal. So why is he blaming you and making such a fuss about this? You really despised his ass.
"That still sounds so insincere princess, but sure I'll accept that, we have bigger robots to fry right now anyway-"
"Don't stop attacking them annihilate them fast!" The mad king exclaimed as he instructed his gigantic robots to attack the two of you even harder. You heard his minions reply and called him Agust, maybe that was his name. Jungkook and you were hiding at this point, their attacks were getting stronger and you really needed to finish this mission fast but that's still a problem for now. Luckily Jungkook thought of a plan, and he decided you should use the remaining bubblegum bombs to destroy all the massive robots, but you had to chew the gums first before blowing it on them.
You blew the last one on the king and successfully eradicated his existence for good. It was satisfying to defeat him albeit it wasn't that easy.
"Ugh, finally we can go home now." Jungkook whined. "Yeah, mayhaps I can't believe we could work as a team." You added. "A team? I did all the work though? Without me you'd probably be-" you cut him off, "Yeah sure, whatever but I still helped blow the gum bombs! Anyway, we better leave now my mother's probably worried."
"I would be too, if I had a daughter like you." he remarked. "What's that supposed to mean Jeon?" You glared at him. "Oh nothing, nothing my princess." there he goes again smirking like a cocky idiot. Gross. He didn't even stop grinning when you rode your monocycles all the way home.
~♡~
"Prince Jeon, Princess Y/N, It's late. What took you so long?" The King inquired. You were surprised to say the least that it wasn't your mother, the queen who was waiting for you when you arrived. "Sorry if I took her out so long your majesty, we decided to visit my kingdom after practicing archery and got distracted. We didn't realize the sun had already set when we were done, my apologies." Jungkook smoothly reasoned.
"It's fine, next time just don't stay out too late. Though Y/N dear, what happened to your dress? It's as dirty as a peasant! Is that how a princess should behave and carry herself? You're lucky your mother isn't here and on an emergency meeting right now, or you'll be grounded for life!" Your father added. "Dad I-" you were about to defend yourself and explain when Jungkook cut you off.
"It's actually my fault, your majesty. Please don't blame Princess Y/N. We were playing at the castle, and mayhaps we had too much fun. I apologize again, your majesty." Jungkook looked at you in a conspiring way, as if to tell you to ride along with his story. "Very well. You should stop apologizing son, accidents can happen." Wow. Your father didn't get mad at the obnoxious rabbit prince, but he got mad at you, how fracking fair. It's totally fine. You truly felt great. "Although you both should always be mindful of how you look and your actions, you are royalty after all." The king added.
"Of course dad, even though I didn't ask to be born like this…" You quipped, voice lowering a little as you finished saying it. "What did you say Y/N?" "Nothing dad, can I go eat dinner now? I'm hungry as heck. Bye Jeon, have a safe trip on the way home." You told Jungkook and were already heading to the dining area when your father decided to say something that stopped you from going there completely, "Mind your language dear, also it's truly quite late, aren't you starving Prince Jungkook?" The king inquired, staring at Jungkook to check his reaction. "Um, It's late your majesty I should be heading home, and I don't know if Princess Y/N wants me to eat with her…" You glared at him and mouthed 'What the fck Jeon? You frackin pig!' well obnoxiously he looked like a rabbit with his big bunny teeth, but the way he was acting now- he was like a starving pig. The king ignored what Jungkook said and told him, "Nonsense boy! I'm sure Princess Y/N will be delighted to have you join us for dinner. I already ate actually, but I'd love to join you both for dinner again I could get some snack- you can't always have enough snacks!" The king exclaimed enthusiastically.
"But dad-" you try to dissuade him to no avail, "No buts my lovely daughter, Prince Jungkook will be joining us for dinner. You should probably change your clothes before you eat dinner, Jungkook and I will head to the dining room first. Come along now Jungkook," The king beckoned as Jungkook followed him to the dining room. You were planning to have a peaceful dinner tonight, but of course Jeon Jungkook would ruin that as fracking always. When will he ever stop annoying you?
You went to your room begrudgingly, and changed into some casual clothes that were still appropriate for dinner but also for having an annoying guest eating with you. After a short while, you finally joined them to eat. You sat beside Jungkook and your father was at the center of the table. It wouldn't have been awkward if your father didn't start to ask obnoxious questions.
"So Prince Jeon, what have you been up to these days? Searching for potential wife candidates?" The king inquired. You glared at your father. Jungkook almost choked on a piece of steak he was eating, but he managed to answer after drinking some water. "Uh, I've been busy with my duties your majesty. Ensuring the safety of my people and thinking of ways to stop the remaining rebels. I haven't really had the time to look for potential wife candidates."
"Oh. It's good to hear that you prioritize the safety of your people Prince Jeon. But you're not getting any younger. Soon enough, you'll need a good wife to be your future queen and help you lead the kingdom. Do you have anyone in mind right now?" The king probed. "Dad- stop being so nosy." You said, annoyed and a little embarrassed. "I'm not, I'm just asking the boy if he has an idea or a person in mind to be his future queen. So do you, Prince Jeon?"
"Um- as I've said your majesty, I'm too busy to think about marriage right now. I'm still young though, so I'm not that in a hurry to get married." Jungkook replied a little uncomfortable but still respectful. "That's comprehensible. I think Y/N here," Your father said while looking at you, "is the same too."
"Although, I have someone in mind for her already." The king announced, making Jungkook feel something weird inside him. Jungkook wondered what the king meant- or who he meant? For some crazy reason, he can't imagine you marrying someone. Or someone else… Of course not that he wants to marry you! But- maybe it wouldn't be so bad at all too. "Okay, this conversation is over dad," You told the king. "We're done eating and Jungkook has to go home, so goodbye everyone I'm going to my room now." You stood up and went to your room in a hurry.
"But Y/N I'm not done talking you brat! I still haven't finished this delicious croissant-" The king quipped disappointedly. "She's quite a disrespectful brat sometimes, I wonder who she got it from- forgive my daughter Jeon."
"It's okay your majesty, I was about to leave too. I'll be going now if you don't mind-"
"Wait-" Jungkook stood up and sat again because of what the king said. "I hope you're not mad at her, she really is a little hard to handle." The king looked at him pitifully, "Oh, I'm not your majesty. Though I won't disagree with you on that statement- about her being hard to handle I mean…" he joked.
"Yes, she is quite stubborn. But I'm sure you can handle her quite well." Jungkook was confused again, what did your father mean? "I'm sorry your majesty, I don't really get what you're trying to say?" The king looked him in the eye gleefully and said, "I'm saying, I like you- for her. I think the both of you would make a perfect match." Jungkook blushed, oh. So that's what he meant.
"Don't you agree Prince Jeon?" The king teased him further. "I-... Yes I suppose so, your majesty." He shyly replied. It would be rude to disagree, or say awful stuff. "That is- if you're not secretly a couple yet, are you not?"
"No!" Jungkook replied a little too loud. "I meant- no we aren't yet your majesty. We're not secretly seeing each other…" he backtracked, calmer now. "Oh, you aren't yet. That's alright, the two of you are still young- there's still a lot of time. We're just excited for your wedding and to see our grandchildren! But all in God's perfect timing- anyway sorry for keeping you here, have a safe trip home Prince Jeon! Hopefully you'll be calling me dad soon." The king whispered the last bit as Jungkook was finally on his way out of the palace, but he still heard it to his dismay, and it didn't help in making the forming blush on his cheeks go away. The thought of getting married with you isn't so appalling to him- but having kids right away… it was weird to think about. The whole conversation was weird to think about and yet it was the most constant thing on his mind the whole night.
~💜~
You were lucky the queen was still on an important meeting as you made your way out of the palace, or so you thought- when your father, the king shouted your name in your lawn. Of course he made you go back to your room, and unless you had important things to do outside you won't be able to go out. And because of that, you resorted to call the bunny prince for help again. So now, you're waiting for him to be your knight in shining armor and take you away from the palace again. After an hour of agony, he finally arrived and managed to convince your father with a shitty excuse to let you go with him. If you weren't seeing things, you might've thought they were whispering some secret information to each other. Your parents always looked like they were so elated to see that prince in the palace. Your dad was being weird now too. Men are such eerie creatures, you thought.
"Hey Jeon. What were you whispering about to my dad a while ago?" You called to him as you rode your speedy monocycles. "What?" Mayhaps he didn't hear you, as the wind gushed too loud. "I said- nevermind." You didn't bother to ask him what they talked about anymore, maybe it didn't matter anyway. You were nearing the academy, and you parked your monocycle right away when you arrived. Not bothering to look at him and see his fangirls flocking over him again.
You were practicing with throwing your dart knives when you overheard a girl and a familiar someone talking. "Baby! You're always so hot and perfect! you're on the top spies leaderboard again, marry me please!" Her rat-like voice annoyed you, so you decided to stare at her in hopes that she'll feel a little embarrassed at least. But to no avail, she only continued her mouth breathing sentiments."I don't mean to be rude Princess Fiona, but I'm not ready to get married right now." or ever with you, Jungkook wanted to add- but he only did in his mind.
And of course, the cause of this headache inducing fiasco is no other than Prince Jungkook, why are you even surprised? Why can't they be annoying somewhere else? Probably a million miles away from you? "Oh, I don't mean right away silly. Maybe in a few weeks or months? I just know we're meant to be my prince." Gawd, you're actually praying for her future husband. Hopefully he can stand her annoying rat-ogre voice. "I'm sorry Fiona, I really think I'm not the right guy for you. Although I heard Lord Farquaad seemed to have feelings for you." Jungkook suggested. "What? Lord Farquaad? Ew, he's a midget gross. Is that why you won't marry me? Are you jealous baby? You don't have to be!" she squealed and giggled, you had to stop yourself for aiming at her face, it wasn't the knife's fault and you were against animal cruelty anyway.
"No," Jungkook sighed, she wasn't getting it. "I'm not jealous. I just think you're better off with Lord Farquaad, and I'm better with…"
"Better with who? Oh please tell me Prince Jeon who's better with you rather than I?" She seemed to look around at other girls, hoping to find the answer to her question when Jungkook still couldn't reply. She only stopped when she noticed you looking at her too, so you looked away from her and turned your attention on a laser gun that was displayed instead. You were planning to tune them out fully, when she spoke something that triggered something in you. Something you didn't quite like.
"When you said you were better off with someone else, did you mean to say you were better off with someone like Princess Y/N? Are you serious Prince Jeon? She's not even that pretty, or that great of a spy." Hearing her utter those ill-founded words made your blood boil, how dare she point out your flaws and insecurity? You were already one of the best spies, yet you still trained to be a better spy everyday, even if you being a spy was against your parents' wishes- maybe that's why you couldn't control your next actions- you threw one of the dart knives at her direction.
Lucky for her, it missed her face by a centimeter. Actually, if you wanted to hit her you could've, but you just wanted to shut her up. And shut her up you did. She was too shocked to speak at first, too in awe at what happened. Until she regained her senses and confronted the perpetrator. "You! Y/N how dare you try to impale my face with that dirty knife! My father will hear about this!" she pointed at you looking mad and ogre-like at the same time.
"Oh stop being too dramatic Fiona, maybe it was an accident, I'm sure Y/N didn't mean to throw it at you." Jungkook said glancing your way, though it looked more like he was trying to save your ass rather than comfort the ogre like princess. "But I did though Jungkook. I meant to aim it at her to shut her up," You replied looking Fiona directly in the eyes. "See Jungkook? She didn't even deny it!" she exclaimed.
"Which I only did because of what you spoke about me. You had the audacity to insult and slander me, yet you got scared of almost getting what you deserved. Please Princess Fiona save it for someone who cares, it's not me or Jungkook but mayhaps another ogre does." You kept your knives and walked away from them. "Come back here you bitch! You still have to pay for almost murdering me!" she screamed wanting to follow you, but Jungkook held her back from doing so.
"Fiona stop harassing Y/N. You won't follow her nor will you continue to insult her, if you as much touch her hair or be near her- you'll be hearing from me. And I also won't hesitate to tell your father about what you're doing." Jungkook reprimanded her and left the fuming princess to follow after you.
Jungkook found you at another training station trying some new gadget that was actually quite useful to distract and even escape rebels, if you were in a hurry. You didn’t seem to notice him yet or you pretended not to, so he made his presence known by speaking first.
"That seems really handy, you could totally make use of that a lot when needing an escape for extremely hard missions." You were still ignoring him so he spoke again. "Not saying you always escape hard missions-" You interrupted him. "Then what are you saying Jeon? Just because I needed a little help from you on that difficult mission, doesn't mean I'll always need someone or something to save me. For the record, I don't always rely on gadgets to defeat enemies, I've successfully completed a lot of missions without them."
"I know that Y/N, I'm just trying to give you some advice." he retorted. "More like you're trying to prove to me that you're always right."
"But aren't I babe? I'm indeed always right,"
"Don't call me that, hearing you call me it just gave me a disease." You chided. "Oh really? I bet you secretly like it though, just like you like me." He boasted. "Wait what? Where did that come from? Are you on crack or did your last brain cell finally decided to leave you?" How dare he assume and say such horrendous things? He's probably hallucinating or something.
"Excuse me I don't do crack, but you don't have to deny it. I get it you're shy, and you were jealous of Fiona that's why you acted up a while ago-" he's truly insufferable. "Me Jealous? Please don't delude yourself, wake up from that dream it isn't healthy." You wanted to leave his delusional ass once more, but he prevented you from doing that when he cornered you to a wall and got too close for comfort. "I can prove it you know, that you're jealous," He was breathing hotly on your face, staring deeply into your eyes and slowly, he seemed to inch his face closer to yours- as if planning to steal a taste of your lips, you were so flustered that you decided to close your eyes. Waiting and kind of hoping to feel his soft lips on yours, but it never came.
Because just before Jungkook could kiss you, you heard someone cough, and the both of you decided to break apart from each other. "Ehem. Agent Y/N and Agent JK, I'm going to assign mission partners, you should both probably be at the assembly hall so you don't miss it." Your instructor said looking at the two of you weirdly. You both awkwardly looked at him back and nodded.
💜
"Agent Fiona and Agent Farquaad, you'll be partners for this mission and probably the succeeding ones too." Your instructor announced, Fiona grimaced seemingly disappointed with who her partner was but not bothering to say anything. Meanwhile, Farquaad had a smile on his face as he was partnered with the gal he liked. When your turn came, you couldn't believe the luck you just had to be partnered with the guy you wanted to avoid the most.
"Agent Y/N and Agent JK, you’ll be partners for this mission and the succeeding ones, as you both are the best spies in this academy." Your instructor said with gleam in his eyes. Did he plan this? Did he think you and Jungkook got along well because of what he almost saw a while ago? What the hell? What is he doing? You were having an internal monologue, as you were still having a hard time processing the fact that you'll have to spend more time with annoying Prince Jungkook again. You couldn't believe it, you wouldn't. Your mental breakdown was interrupted by someone's disgustingly familiar voice speaking to you,
"So, partners huh? I'd say I'm glad to be partnered by a top spy in our academy, but I'm not really sure I am. Maybe 'cause I loathe it as much as you do?" You glared at him. "As if I'll be partners with you," you retorted and stormed off to find your instructor to plead with him.
"Um. Excuse me sir, can I please switch partners?" you pleaded to your instructor when you found him. "Agent Y/N… I'm sorry, but I chose your partners for a reason. Also, Agent JK is one of the best spy princes. I don't understand why you don't wanna be partners with him?" He replied.
"I know sir, but- we just don't get along that well, and actually, I think I can handle a mission on my own just fine." you explained. "I'm one of the best spies as you've said, and we all know that's true so… Please?"
"I'm really sorry Agent Y/N, but my decision is final. Your partner is Agent JK, and if you have problems with each other right now, then hopefully this mission will help you guys resolve it, and make you feel closer." Your instructor paused for a bit, you didn't know why but he was seemingly and suddenly in deep thought. "If you don't mind me asking and I don't mean to be nosy, but are you guys having a lovers quarrel or something?" he inquired.
"W-what? Of course not sir! Me and him lovers? Not in this lifetime. Why did you even think of that if I may ask?" you were flustered but curious. Did your instructor think of that because of what he saw a while ago? You didn't even know what truly transpired between you and Jungkook in that moment, you just knew that it felt right and wrong at the same time. "I think you realize that I saw you both a while ago, you two were pretty close to each other. I just thought you might be dating. It's a little disappointing that you aren't but that's okay." you fought another blush that threatened to show in your cheeks because of what your instructor said.
"But sir- why would it be disappointing?" you asked dumbly. "It's a little disappointing because you two look great together. You're both compatible in my opinion," he said looking at you seriously. "You're both top spies, both popular within the academy and even outside of it, you're both competitive, but you complement each other. Should I tell you more?" you didn't know if he was asking rhetorically or if he really wanted you to answer that question, so you just looked at the walls of the academy instead. But you also thought about what he said, did you and Jungkook really complement each other?
"If you don't have anymore questions Agent YN, I'll be going now. I still have some tasks to do, but remember that I'm rooting for both of you." he smiled at you knowingly, and your instructor went back to his room. Whether he meant that in regards to you both being spies, or the concept of you and Jungkook dating, mayhaps it was both- you didn’t know. But you were more scared than curious to ponder about it and find out.
You still went home together with Jungkook despite of the awkward air around the two of you, even if you didn't wanna be partners with him mayhaps you didn't have any choice, so why bother complaining about it anymore. You both chose to stay silent during the ride on the way home, not really talking until you arrived at the palace.
👑
"You got home late again. What have you both been doing that's taking up your whole time and day?" The king inquired immediately when you both arrived. "Dad- we were just…" You replied until Jungkook cut you off again, he seemed to be doing that frequently these days.
"We were just hanging out as usual your majesty. Actually- we're hanging out too much because…" Jungkook hesitantly took a peek in your direction, "Because- we're dating." what in the name of crippled hairy ballsacks is he on now? Mayhaps he's really lost it and now cursing you.
"What the hell are you talking about Jeon?" you yelled and glared at him. He looked like he was trying to talk to you telepathically with his eyes, because he obviously can't do it with his mind. "Y/N- can you just play along-" he whispered to you. Your father wasn't all too happy with the way you screamed and cursed though, so he reprimanded you again. "Princess Y/N! Your language!" he also yelled brows furrowed in disappointment. "Have you forgotten your manners? A princess doesn't act like a tasteless fool!" he chided, you ignored him and pretended that you didn’t hear him. You just wanted to go to your room and disappear forever.
"And you Prince Jeon, is what you're saying the truth?" The king said as he looked at Jungkook pointedly. "Are you and Y/N truly dating? Why haven't you told us this? When did you both even start seeing each other?"
"Your majesty I can explain. Please don't be furious at us- or at least at Y/N that much-" Jungkook reasoned. "We wanted to keep it a secret for a while, as we were afraid of your reaction."
"Well aren't you afraid now? You just confessed your relationship in front of me." The king said. "We still are. Though I thought maybe you needed to know now, because secrets aren't meant to be kept forever." Jungkook explained.
"And is that truly the reason why you keep visiting Princess Y/N here and having all your rendezvous?" The king inquired again. "Well obviously dad, didn't you hear what he said?" You retorted smartly. You decided you were going to go with whatever this ballsack show Jungkook wants to play, if that meant your real secret won't be found out. (that is if they don't know of it already and are just letting you go for now.) Anyway, If this fake relationship is your escape pass then so be it. You were still planning to confront Jungkook about this shit show later though.
"Stop being sassy you brat, I wasn't talking to you, I was clearly asking our prince here." your dad scolded you. "Did you even court her properly Prince Jeon? I hope you did everything you can to truly deserve her heart."
"I- I did…Your majesty. I can tell you all about how I wooed her during dinner. That is if you'll allow me to stay for dinner?" Jungkook somewhat smoothly replied. You gave him a grim warning look- because he was really pushing it. Though mayhaps, you supposed him staying for dinner wouldn't be so insufferable- since you could talk to him after, and discuss what's going on in his heinous mind.
"Alright, Prince Jeon. You can stay for dinner, and maybe you can convince me if you're truly fitting for my dear Princess Y/N." The king replied.
👸🤴👑
Your father and Jungkook chatted amicably, though the king interrogated Jungkook a lot about your relationship. The king asked about how you both realized you were in love with each other, which was awkward because you weren't really in love. You let Jungkook do all the talking since he's a better liar in your opinion. Your father even had the audacity to ask when was your first kiss together? To which Jungkook almost choked on his water, while his cheeks burned red. It didn't seem like he'd stop interrogating Jungkook soon, so before he could ask Jungkook more personal questions like, if you'd slept together already- (It was common for the new generation of royals in your land to sleep around even before being wed.) You decided to interrupt and end their conversation.
You excused yourself from the table, telling your father you were full, and took Jungkook with you. The king surprisingly allowed you to go without a lot of fuss, but he did shoot you both suggestive looks. When you got to your room, Jungkook seemed to be relieved that you stopped the king from torturing him even further. Maybe using the word 'torturing' was a bit harsh- but that was kinda what Jungkook felt when your father asked him all those personal questions. Not that he was truly in pain, but more like he felt weird thinking about all the little white lies he told the king. He wondered if in the future it might come true? Would he still feel awkward or would he enjoy it? He was interrupted from his pondering when he heard your adorable voice, he realized you were talking to him.
"Hello?? Earth to rabbit prince? I was asking you a question but you seemed to be on planet mars or something," You commented while sitting on your bed. "Oh, sorry. I was just thinking about some stuff and things…" He was thinking about the possibilities of you and him- was what he wanted to say, but he'll probably never say it even if he was blackmailed by an enemy. "Stuff and things huh? Are you the main lead of Walking Dead now? Anyway- I was just asking you why you suddenly decided that we should fake date?"
"I-" Jungkook sighed while sitting on the chair near your bed, "I thought you had the idea why already," he simply replied. "Well, maybe I do have an idea." you told him. "But is my idea correct? Did you do it so I could go on missions without having a hard time sneaking out on my parents?"
"I guess. Mayhaps, I wanted to help you in a way." he shyly admitted, avoiding looking at your direction. "For real though? Why? What's in it for you?" you inquired, curious as to why he did such things to help you. "I don't know, maybe just because," was his curt reply. "Just because? What kind of answer is that? It doesn't make sense. I still want to know Jungkook," you probed.
"Maybe it's just because I can okay?" you looked at him still unconvinced. "Fine- maybe because I feel a little bad for you. You have boomer parents who still think you should stick to being a prim and proper princess, when we both know how much you want to be an amazing superspy too. And you already are," He told you, looking at you proudly. "But, I know how much you want to protect yourself and the people you love. I know that you love being a spy and going on missions. So maybe, that's why I made the whole fake dating show." He proclaimed.
"Okay...that seems comprehensible. You didn't have to do it, but you still did anyway. So I wanna thank you for that." you told Jungkook honestly. "Actually I was mad at first, I was confused about what your plan was. I didn't realize you were doing it for me. But when I did, I guessed it didn't seem so bad after all." you confessed looking at him shyly. "It's okay, I didn't tell you about it beforehand too. So I can understand why you were mad." he replied.
"Uh… yeah. Though, I'm still sorry for being rude. I guess we'll have to get along because we're partners now anyway." you suggested. "Okay, I guess we should try to be friends since we're partners now." Jungkook replied. Maybe being friends with Jungkook wouldn't be so bad.
👑
Your first official mission with Jungkook was at a nearby kingdom. It was reigned by the Kim family, and now ruled by their obnoxious tyrant son, Kim Seokjin. His beloved parents have been deceased for a few years now, that is why he's became king, and is doing whatever he wants with the land. Your mission is to teach him a lesson; and that is to learn how to share his wealth to his people. He doesn't care about anyone but himself. He's using up all the land's wealth for his selfish needs, and leaving his people to die of hunger and starvation.
Meeting King Seokjin was quite amusing. He didn't even spare you a glance as he sat on his throne, and looked at his face in his handheld mirror. He seemed to focus on his face only, quite a narcissistic trait. He also didn't seem to take you both seriously when you told him that he should change his ways- before it's too late. That is why you had no choice but to make him listen to you even if you had to exert a little force.
You had shot the wall near where he was sitting with your laser gun, (you also finally decided to bring a few gadgets just in case.) therefore catching his attention, finally. "What the hell? Are you deranged? Why did you do that you imbecile! You could've hit my beautiful face! I could have you killed for trying to scratch my gorgeous face you know!" King Seokjin exclaimed. "Well we had to get your attention you narcissistic king. You won't listen to us." Jungkook answered him for you.
"Stop acting like a spoiled child, and help your people. They need you." You retorted. "Who are you peasants to even tell me what to do?!! Actually, how did you both even get inside here? Guards!" the tyrant king screamed. "We're just people who were sent to teach you a lesson. Your guards are asleep if you must know. We kind of knocked them out, sorry about that your majesty." Jungkook quipped.
"Who are you heathens? I don't have time for your tomfoolery, so if it's money you want then just tell me how much and maybe I'll give you some." King Seokjin proclaimed. "We don't want any of your dirty money. What we want is that you learn how to share them with your people." You chided. "Share my money with commoners? What kind of ridiculous thing are you talking about? I'll never share my wealth with useless peasants! Never!"
"The useless peasants you called are the ones feeding you, and are the source of the food you eat. You don't even pay them for their rice and crops, you only know how to take but never give back." "I don't care what you say! I'm not sharing my money with slaves or anyone else even til I die!" he screamed. It seemed like he truly wasn't gonna cooperate or change his ways, so you had to resort to doing things by force yet again.
"Fine, you're really not gonna change? Then we'll just have to make you then." You announced to him. "Oh. please make me!" King Seokjin mocked. "Oh we really are, until you learn your lesson you selfish king." Jungkook retorted. And before he could reply or notice, you were both tying him up on his chair that he loves sitting on. And when he realized what you had done, it was too late and he couldn't move anymore. "What are you doing? Let me go! You'll pay for this you crazies!"
"I think we won't be paying for anything unlike you, your majesty. Now if you don't want us to carry you and leave you outside for the townspeople to beat up- you'll give us the money to pay your people." Jungkook demanded. "How dare you threaten me?! I'm not scared of you buffoons! And I'm not giving you any of my money! If you don't untie me this instant, you'll truly regret it! I promise you both!" He exclaimed. "I see you still won't cooperate with us, Okay. Let's go agent Fox."
Jungkook motioned for you to untie King Seokjin on the chair, only to tie him up again as Jungkook carried him down his throne. You were about to go out and leave him on the streets for the townspeople to beat up, when he suddenly screamed and begged you both not to. "Wait! Are you really gonna leave me out there to get beaten up?! Please don't! They'll ruin my beautiful face! Ok- Okay! I'll tell you where my money is and share them to my people! Just put me down please!"
"Are you seriously gonna help your people now? Do you promise?" Jungkook inquired. "Yes! Yes I promise! Now please put me down." King Seokjin replied. Jungkook put him back on his throne and you both waited for him to do what he promised. After getting some money from his secret vault, he then fulfilled his promise of paying the people he's been indebted with for so long. You both went with him to visit the townspeople he neglected and left to starve. Surprisingly, he paid them without so much fuss and no complaints from him. Even the townspeople were shocked at his sudden actions.
After giving the people the money they deserved, You were both surprised to be invited by the King for dinner. He explained that he wanted to thank you for making him realize his selfish ways, and he wanted to show you how grateful he was by letting you enjoy a good meal. Not wanting to be rude and mayhaps you were both kinda hungry too, you accepted his offer of dinner.
The dinner with the king went well. Mayhaps too well that is. You were just finishing your dessert when you felt a little light headed. You didn’t wanna think about it too much and ignored it, but then you felt dizzy. You decided to ask Jungkook if he felt the same weird feeling you felt but when you looked at him sitting beside you he was already knocked out on the table. Something seems amiss. "Excuse me King Seokjin, there's something wrong with your food. Did you put something in it?" you asked struggling to stay conscious. You knew you were right, when you looked at the treacherous king. He was grinning. "Oh. Did I? It's such a shame you caught on too late my dear. Have a nice slumber!" You were really gonna kick his ass when you regain your strength. But for now you had no choice but to succumb to the darkness inviting you so enticingly. Your last memory being King Seokjin's taunting and laughing face.
You woke up confused and unsure of where you were, til you remembered the events of yesterday. The narcissistic king. The dinner. Jungkook. You guys blacked out. It was morning you guessed, but you couldn't really see anything since you had been blindfolded. Your other senses were more alert since you couldn't see, but you just wanted to feel if Jungkook was there with you. If he was near you. "Agent Bunny…? Are you here? Are you near me?" you called, you were glad the crazy king didn't tape your mouth to shut you up so you could call out for your partner. You were starting to get nervous because you didn't hear Jungkook respond right away. What if King Seokjin did something to him? Where did he take him?
You wanted to escape at that moment and find Jungkook, but you realized your hands were tied up. You couldn't do so much but try to thrash around and be free. Your gadgets were probably confiscated too, so you couldn't use them. You were still trying to escape when you heard a muffled sound that made you stop. Was it Jungkook? "Agent Bunny! Was that you? Are you okay? I'll get us out of here, don't worry!" Jungkook tried to reply, but of course all you heard was his muffled voice. You thrashed again as if it'll help you, when the traitor king made his presence obvious. "Oh you should worry. If you don't stop moving around, the rope that's holding you might snap. And you wouldn't want to know where you'll be falling into." he chided.
The rope that's holding you? What did he mean? Weren't you sitting down on a chair? Wait- is that why it feels weird and unstable? Are you… hanging in the air? Ballsacks. "Fine, since I'm feeling a little merciful today, I'll let your partner or is he your boyfriend? give you a little warning." the king said as he removed the cover on Jungkook's mouth, "Y/N- I meant- agent Fox! stop moving! The rope that's holding your chair is weak, If it snaps you'll fall into a piranha tank!" In Jungkook's haste to warn you, he forgot and called you by your real name again.
You didn't really mind his mistake that much right now, until the obnoxious king taunted you. "Wait- did I hear that right? Did your boyfriend just call you Y/N? Is that your name princess? It is isn't it? A dreadful name for a dreadful girl!" You weren't actually tasked to kill him but you just might. How dare he slander your name? Just he wait til you get out of here alive, you'll absolutely kick his ass! "Shut up you're the dreadful one Kim Seokjin! How dare you call her that, and insult her name!" Jungkook defended you.
"Yada yada. You're the one who should shut up. Do you want to be muffled again?" the king threatened your partner. "Let us go you foolish king! What do you gain from doing all of this anyway?" You inquired. "And what if I don't huh? What are you gonna do about it? Nothing! You can't do anything you tied up fools! You asked me what do I gain from this? A satisfying revenge! And now your boyfriend is gonna see you get eaten by piranhas, but he won't be able to do anything but watch." He retorted.
Of course it makes sense how Jungkook was able to see where you were right now, the king didn't blindfold Jungkook like he did with you. But he covered his mouth instead. "You're wrong, King Seokjin. I'm gonna save her and you can't stop me!" Jungkook screamed furious at the king. "And how are you planning to do that? You can't even get up from your seat. I'd tell you I'd like to see you try, but I've already wasted too much of my precious time for this nonsense." King Seokjin yawned seemingly to show his boredom and annoyance. "Guards! Pull the rope and bring her down." He ordered to them, but before they could pull the rope and feed you to the piranhas- a commotion happened.
And there stood, two people you didn't expect to see. "Our instructor was wondering where you two were ya know? Tsk. For supposedly being the best spies you two are getting rusty." Fiona the ogre looking princess said. "Anyway, sir told us to find you guys and save your asses, that's why we're here. I don't like you but sir asked us to save you both- so it's whatever." Fiona said as she got rid of the guards who were still trying to pull you down. Of course Agent Farquaad came with her too, and he was the one who helped untie Jungkook. Seokjin was still shookt at how his plans crumbled ever so quickly, that he just stood there mouth agape.
For the first time in your life, you were kinda relieved to see her. You finally got out of your restraints and you wanted to face King Seokjin right away, but Fiona's next words stopped you. "Now that we've saved you both, our job here is done. Though next time, try to do your job better idiots so we don't have to do it for you." she told you as they were about to go, you didn't have the time to get mad at her so you just ignored her, but before they actually did she told you one last thing. "Oh I almost forgot, there are rumors about rebels planning to attack this dumb king who hostaged you. They might be on the way here now. We'd love to help ya guys, but we have other rebels from another city to take care of. So ttyl!" and then she scurried off with her partner.
Well it's not like you can't fight the rebels yourselves, but an earlier warning would've been nice. You moved closer to Jungkook who was keeping an eye on the now submissive king. "So bunny, what's the plan now?" you inquired. "I guess we wait for them to arrive and defeat them all." was his reply. You nodded in agreement, of course that's what you're going to do.
The rebels arrived not long after, and it was quite a taxing battle, but nothing you weren't used to. They carried high tech weapons too, but you managed to steal some from them and use it on them. Just as one rebel almost shot King Seokjin, you managed to pull him to the side just in time and save his plumpous ass. To say he was shocked that you saved him, was an understatement. He was literally in awe that you still saved his life, even if he had tied you up and almost fed you to the piranhas.
The act was actually enough that he started to mayhaps have a change of heart. After a hundred butts kicked and a few exhausting hours later, you finally defeated the rebels. Police reinforcements came to collect most of them (because a few rebels always manage to escape) and took them to jail, meanwhile you've never wanted more but to get back home already and just lie on your bed for a month. Your partner looked exhausted too, but still undeniably handsome. Not that you'll ever admit that to him. You were actually missing home, even though it's only been a day. Your parents would probably- oh glob, your parents! They're probably worried sick now. You hope you'll still be allowed to go out after this.
You were so busy worrying if you'll get grounded, that you didn’t notice the narcissistic King coming up to you. "Hey." He called out, breaking you out of your thoughts and surprising you. What did he want now? "I just wanted to say, thanks for saving me. You shouldn't have, but you still did anyway. And I'm sorry for everything. Promise, I'm being sincere this time." He seemed sincere with his apology, even though he couldn't really look you in the eye that well. You could say he was embarrassed? Or guilty? Maybe both. Still, you wanted to tease him and so you probed. "Are you really being honest now? Or is it another act of yours to deceive me again?"
"I'm being sincere this time I swear, I really felt awful about what I did to you. What I did to you both." he corrected. "I realized how selfish and crazy I've been, and I'm honestly sorry for that." "Well it's great that you realized your mistakes. I forgive you I guess, I don't wanna hold grudges for too long anyway." you replied. "Really? Thank you so much! I swear I'll prove to you that I'll change for real this time." he exclaimed getting your partner's attention, making him check up on you both in case something's wrong.
"Is everything alright with you two?" Jungkook asked. "Yeah bunny. He was just apologizing that's all." you replied. "Oh ok. Wait- he apologized? For real? How unbelievable." he then sent an accusing look at King Seokjin. "Yes he did. He seemed genuine so let's just let bygones be bygones." "Yeah. You sure he won't drug us to sleep again?" "Jungkook-"
"I won't. I should've never, it was truly wrong of me. I'm sorry for taunting you and for every wrong thing I've done. Believe me, I really do feel shitty for hurting you guys who saved me." King Seokjin heard your conversation and decided to apologize to Jungkook too. "If there's anything I could do to make it up to you guys, just please tell me. I'll do it in a heartbeat." "Hmm. Maybe there is something you could do." Jungkook suddenly had an idea.
👑
"Princess Y/N! Where have you been? we've been worried sick about you! Your mother couldn't sleep waiting for you!" Your father said when you finally arrived home. "Dad it was just a day, we were invited by our friend King Seokjin to stay for the night because it was getting late." you reasoned.
"King Seokjin? Is he the gorgeous man standing next to Jungkook right now?" your father inquired. "Yes dad," "Who is he? Why didn't you both tell us about him?" "He's our new friend, we helped him and he felt grateful so he made us stay for the night."
"It's amazing how you can plan quite a perfect lie my dear, you may have fooled your father- but we both know you can't fool me." the queen finally appeared. "So tell me Y/N, where were you really?" "Mom… I can explain-" "Were you at that spy academy of yours? Or going on those nonsense missions weren't you? I'm very disappointed in you Y/N. I thought you had quit being a useless spy. But of course, you had lied to me." she scolded you. You didn’t know what hurt more, the fact that she was disappointed in you, or the fact that she thought and probably still thinks- you're a useless spy.
"She isn't a useless spy, she saved me for crying out loud!" you were surprised to see King Seokjin was actually defending you. Maybe he truly had changed. "It's true your majesty. She isn't a useless spy, in fact she's one of the best spies in our academy. She's one of the best spies I know." Jungkook added. "Spectacular, but I don't recall asking you both for your opinion. So I suggest you both stay out of this. King Seokjin it's nice to meet you but you can go home now. As for you Prince Jungkook, you should probably leave too. I had a feeling you influenced her, and I was right." the queen reprimanded.
"Jungkook didn't influence me! I wanted to be a spy on my own. I just don't understand why you won't let me. Do you not love me mom?" you exclaimed. "Enough Y/N! Not another word from you, or you'll be spending your whole life in your tower. You're grounded for a year, and that's final. Guards, escort Princess Y/N to her tower and make sure she stays there for a year." you can't believe your mother right now, she had done this before when she first discovered what you were doing in the academy, and now she's doing it again. "Darling, don't you think you're being a little too harsh on our daughter? Locked for a year in her tower? Isn't that quite too much-" the king interrupted but the queen silenced him. "No I'm not being too harsh on her, you're too lenient on her that's why she keeps being a brat. She needs to learn how to listen to me, I'm her mother and the queen after all.
You lashed out on some of the guards on the way to your tower, you were just so upset you couldn't believe it had come to this. You could've escaped them easily, but you didn't want to be disowned by your family. So you decided to take your punishment.
You scrolled through your phone for the nth time today, and you were bored. Luckily, she at least let you had your phone. You wanted to see if you had new missions to do, but you felt conflicted too, because you can't disobey your mother this time. You were just planning to take a nap again when a strawberry hit you on the face. You looked at your window to find out where the strawberry came from, and you were in awe to see it was your bunny prince on a drone airplane. "Jungkook? How did you- why are you here?"
"To get you out, of course. Who else would help you other than me?" he cockily said. "You didn't even tell me you were coming. Anyway, thanks for wanting to take me out of here, but I can't. Even if I really want to escape, I can't anymore Jungkook." you refused. "You can't or you shouldn't? I know you're afraid of disappointing your mother again baby, but I think she'll understand. Besides, I think she was just angry at that moment. She probably wants to let you go back to your room now."
Your heart warmed at his pet name for you, but you still can't agree to go with him. "Exactly, Kook. Maybe she'll want to end my punishment sooner, but what if she finds out I disobeyed her again? She'll be furious, and I don't want my punishment to be extended." "Well what if she doesn't find out? I'm sure she can't see me when I'm this high on the ground. And I promise I'll bring you back home before they check on you. Come on princess, do you really wanna stay here alone in your tower, for a year?" he persuaded. "I don't… but ugh, I hate you Jeon Jungkook. Fine, just let me get my stuff." you caved in. How were you supposed to say no when a guy as annoyingly handsome as prince Jeon asked you?
You hopped on the airplane drone and went away with your handsome prince. You and Jungkook just flew around the land, it was awe inspiring to look at the villages and people from above. When he finally brought you home you felt a little glum that the day had to end. You were relieved that you weren't caught by the queen though. You were relieved to have Prince Jeon with you. You texted your instructor about your current situation and why you can't go on missions for a while. He told you he understood, he truly is the best instructor.
Jungkook came to see you again the next day. He didn't take you away this time, he just stayed with you and you two talked all day. Jungkook visited your tower everyday, and you couldn't help but fall for him each passing day too. One night, the two of you finally shared your first kiss and it felt amazing. He didn't come back the next day though, which made you feel worried that he didn't feel the same way. Unbeknownst to you, he was actually planning how to get you out of your current situation- while he couldn't stop thinking about your kiss too.
"Y/N, it's been 3 months since you've been locked here in your tower. I don't mind visiting you but, don't you miss going on missions with me? Don't lie, I know you do. We need to get you out of here." Jungkook declared. "Jungkook is that why you didn't come yesterday? 'Cause you were planning my escape from here?" you inquired still a little upset, he didn't come to see you yesterday. "Yes actually. Why? Did you think about something else?"
"No… I just thought- nevermind it doesn't matter." "Of course it matters princess, tell me what's on your mind." he asked you moving closer to touch your cheek fondly. "I thought you didn't like our kiss… And that you thought it was a mistake. Am i right?" you asked honestly.
"No you aren't baby. I loved our kiss, I couldn't stop thinking about it. I'm sorry I made you think that way, I really was just busy pondering how to get you out of here. But I have a plan now, and that's why I'm here to ask you if you'll agree with it."
"You do? You have a plan? Why do I have a feeling it's gonna be chaotic… But fine- I wanna hear it anyway,"
"Run away with me."
Ballsacks, he's kidding right? Your Jungkook is kidding right?
💜
You made a decision that day that changed your life. You ran away with Jungkook and lived at his palace. You were finally free to go on missions without worrying about what your mother would say. Jungkook kept your existence at the palace a secret at first, putting you in a secret room no one else knows but him. But of course as all secrets do, all secrets will be revealed. His parents found out that you were now living with them, and they were shookt but thankfully they let you stay.
They advised you to tell your parents though, so your parents would stop worrying about you. You did tell your parents about your whereabouts, you missed them after all. But you also told them you couldn't live with them, if they can't accept you for being a spy. You only talked to your father, the king. As your mother didn't seem interested to talk to you. You hoped she'll accept you for who you are someday.
3 years passed and you've decided to return to the palace, your home. You're full of nerves as you're worried about how they'll react to you coming back, but also because you have an important thing to talk about to them. You had returned to inform and personally invite them to your wedding. Your relationship with Jungkook grew stronger over the years, and one lovely night he proposed to you, which you accepted of course. That's why you're now getting married and elated to be one with him.
You're with Jungkook as you faced your parents. They looked quite surprised to see your presence again after a few years. Your father smiled at you and he seemed happy to finally see you again. Your mother on the other hand, still looked indifferent as before. "My dearest princess, I'm so glad you came back." your father told you. "I'm happy to see you too, dad." you smiled at him. "Actually, I'm here- I mean we're here, because we wanted to tell you something very important. Jungkook and I are getting married."
They didn't seem surprised to hear that actually. You guessed they figured out why you came today. "We want to personally invite you to our wedding. It'd be great if you both were there." you added. "Of course we'll be there. It's a good thing we didn't have to push through with the arranged marriage we planned for you guys before. It's spectacular that you fell for each other naturally." the queen surprised you all when she replied. She didn't seem to mean it with malice but with all honesty.
"Wait- you were planning to make us have an arranged marriage?" you inquired, you weren't mad anymore just shocked that your parents had planned to wed you with Jungkook after all. "Yes. Well it was because Jungkook's parents are our friends, and your marriage would be great to strengthen our kingdom. We're sorry if the knowledge infuriates you now."
"It doesn't. I'm just surprised that's all. Anyway, mayhaps we're truly meant to be as I'm still marrying him now." you said quite fondly. "The preparations have started as the wedding is in 3 days, the stylists will come soon so please tell them if you need something. I already picked yours and dad's clothes, I hope you don't mind. Can I stay in my room for tonight? Jungkook can take the guest room." you asked. "Wait Y/N. I wanted to apologize for being a cruel mother to you." the queen's words stopped you. "I'm sorry for locking you in the tower which made you runaway from us."
"I'm sorry for not believing in you, I always knew you were a great spy- I just didn't wanna acknowledge it because I was scared of losing you. And I did anyway. I guess I'm just sorry for being a bad mom and for everything my dear. I hope someday you'll be able to forgive me." you could feel the queen's remorse through her words and facial expressions, and you realized there wasn't really anger anymore. You were just sad for the lost time. "Thanks mom, that's all I've ever wanted to hear. I just wanted you to be proud of me. And you aren't a bad mother, I understand now why you did those things. Though they're quite questionable, but I forgive you. I already did a long time ago." You hugged each other and were finally glad to be on good terms again.
👰
Your wedding day came, and everything went perfect. You wore the loveliest wedding dress, and Jungkook wore the fittest suit. You only invited your close friends and family, you actually just wanted a simple wedding. The selfish but now kind King Seokjin, came too. Along with your fellow agents, Fiona and Farquaad. They all watched as you two sealed your newly formed union with a short but sweet passionate kiss.
After the glorious event, you were now inside Jungkook's room fidgeting and anticipating- what to do for the remainder of the night. You had just finished taking a relaxing bath, and were now dressed in your nightgown. Were you finally gonna do it with him after abstaining for years? Thoughts ran through your mind while waiting for Jungkook. He had to go somewhere for a bit because of some emergency prince duties. He was even busier now, that they want him to take over as the new king. But surely he'll make time for you on your wedding night right?
You were getting sleepy waiting for him when after a while, the knob to his door slowly turned. And then came your prince- and husband, the person you've been waiting for. "I'm sorry I took so long baby, the council and the advisors were just so-" "It's okay Kook, just come here and lie with me," you called. You didn’t even realize the implications of your words until you said them, and you couldn't take them back. You blushed furiously at seeming so desperate.
"I will my love, I'm just gonna take a shower first, then I'll come join you in bed" he chirped. After Jungkook's long agonizing shower- (or it just seemed long to you, when he really didn't take that long) he finally joined you in bed. Though, you couldn't face him because you were so embarrassed of your daring words awhile ago, that you may or may not have meant. You pretended to be asleep, but of course Jungkook knows you too much to know you were just pretending. "I know you're awake baby, don't pretend to fall asleep on me now. Not when we haven't made love yet."
Jungkook's words made you a little wet, okay maybe a lot. How can he be so irresistible? You tried to take a peek at his face but failed miserably, as your attention went to his beautifully sculptured body. He was lying so close to you without any clothes on! You almost saw his dick if not for the sheets covering it. "Like what you see my love? I didn't put any clothes on yet, 'cause It would be stupid if I'm just gonna take them off in a bit. I've really been waiting for this night Y/N," he said, touching your back through your nightgown tracing your curves.
"I'm finally gonna claim you and make you mine, can I make love to you now my love?" Jungkook sincerely inquired, and you gave him your permission because you wanted him to. You wanted him to make you his and you wanted to make love with him too. And you showed how much you loved each other all through the night. You loved it when he treated you so delicately, and he wasn't in a rush. You loved it when he sucked your perky nipples until they were so sensitive and swollen. You loved it when he thrusted inside you while kissing you at the same time and holding your hand. You loved your partner in crime Jeon Jungkook, the most loyal agent and bunny in the world. Your prince and your husband. And you're pretty sure he loved you too.
And they loved happily ever after. Fin. 🧚🏻‍♀️
A/N: tysm for reading! If you enjoyed please reblog and leave a nice comment! 🥺💜
Btw! This is the pic dat's should've been on the insert pic but tumblr luvs to f- me raw in the ass, so it re-arranged it. I'm only on mobile so i can't do sht so im very sorry!
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sitp-recs · 3 years
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Hi! I love your blog and the efforts you put into reccing. My question is less about recs themselves and more how you organise your recs 'behind the scenes.' As someone who is hyper organised in some ways and frantically disorganised in others, it would be really cool to know the process that goes into maintaining a rec blog like this if you're happy to share (and of course absolutely no worries if not) <3
Oh my gosh I am so flattered to see you here! As a reader, there are few things cooler than one of your all-time favorite authors saying they appreciate your blog, thank you so much <3 sorry for the extremely long reply ahead, it’s been so long since I’ve answered anything that wasn’t a reclist I got a bit too excited here 😂
First of all, I feel you on a spiritual level re: being organized for some things but not for others; in fact, I struggle a lot between those two sides of the same coin when it comes to fandom. I’ve always been a bit of a chaotic reader - I don’t keep track of my reads, my 600 bookmarks are all mixed without tags, my phone currently has 85 open tabs - most of them fics I wanna read or reread, plus the epics I save on my Marked for Later list... and then never read them lol.
All in all, I’m a complete mess at keeping track of my reads and because my memory is not very good with specific details, I used to take a lot longer to put a reclist together when I started doing this. In this sense, you could say I don’t really organize my blog at all 😂 I try and give up on queueing, I lose links to old reclists and never add them on my masterlist, I don’t even have a backup in case my blog gets deleted, that’s the level of chaos we’re talking about here lol give me danger or nothing
But if we’re talking about making the lists and feeding the blog on a regular basis, after a while you kinda... fall into a routine and get used to your own process, I think? It’s still hard work but reasonably time-consuming once you find a method that actually works for you. I have good memory for titles so first I’ll go through my bookmarks, then depending on the request I also check AO3’s tags to find fics I’ve read before but haven’t kept track of. I only rec stuff I’ve read and enjoyed - unless we’re talking about tropes that aren’t my jam, in which case I either leave the room to people more familiar with them or I tag other reclists, or I highlight fics that I’ve read at some point and might work for someone else. To be honest most of my lists feature the same fics over and over, some of them are quite similar if you look closely!
This process has been working well for me so far, and despite being quite energy-consuming, it’s also a nice therapy! That’s why I keep doing it now that I don’t have as much time to read and write single recs. One thing that helped me along the way was accepting that I wouldn’t be able to deliver every ask, or make the “ultimate reclist”, and that’s okay. I try to encompass as many tropes and authors as I can, but truth is I’m not a fandom authority and there’s a lot I haven’t - and won’t - read. So once I let go of the pressure to deliver perfect lists and really internalized that these are just a few personal suggestions, things became easier.
On that note, reccing is something that can get stressful pretty quickly - either because you’re too perfectionist and feel like you gotta know everything, or because some people come at you being rude and demanding - so setting boundaries to both yourself and the others is necessary and healthy imo! Wow ok this really became a tl;dr rant and I’m not even sure I got to answer your ask properly, but I appreciate you taking the time to send it! It’s always fun to take a minute and reflect on these topics. Hope you’re having a great weekend! Welcome back!
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relaxxattack · 3 years
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ayo! (wait this might be a bit of a jumpscare dishdks i apologize) i’m op of That Post and was wondering what your opinions were on the whole woobification thing? /gen
because it’s a Tiny Bit widespread within the dream apologists to sort of,, overdramatize stuff like l’manberg hurting him. like they’re not a 100% wrong but if you look at it subjectively you can see some sort of bias going into that sort of thing that makes the character’s mistreatment a bit more blatant and intentional which,, it really wasn’t? and there wasn’t That Much of it either. especially on twitter (tumblr is much better about it) people just jump to conclusions it seems and yeah. since you brought it up i was wondering if you wanted to write a bit about it from your perspective!
we’re kinda from different corners of the fandom but i still notice that once you are too attached to a character you start taking certain evidence and giving it more weight than it actually has. there’s a blurry line between “taking away a character’s humanity” and woobification and it’s extremely difficult to find a balance when said character shows pretty much nothing of his emotional life (e. g. putting up the intimidating villain act in front of only c!tommy, pretty much everything he does making rational sense with no emotional subtext) and a lot of the fandom instantly jumps to one side or the other while it’s like.
we don’t know by far enough to say “he’s traumatized” or “he isn’t traumatized” or “he was villainized and it hurt him” or “l’manberg didn’t affect him at all”
as a very analytical person people constantly jumping to conclusions grinds my gears, but that’s about it for my own view of the situation - sorry for the rambling.
in general i agree with you that both dehumanization and woobification is Bad and i really hope getting Actual Context sorts this out (e. g. him saying he was betrayed by his friends doesn’t mean it wasn’t partially his fault or that they were allowed to leave him, but it also shows that he did care about that happening. mentioning the cat doesn’t mean anything about what happened to c!tommy but it also shows that he did care about what happened to it. it’s just always interesting to get more information about the way he feels because he usually does a very good job at hiding it.) because man.
it’s like being stuck between a rock and a hard place, especially if you also are attached to the character and are expected to automatically agree with everything the people on “your side” say. it just ends up with everyone being mad and the character being mischaracterised overall.
oh wow hello! i didnt expect the op of the post to find me you’re right lol
and yes i agree! you seem to have a lot of very good thoughts tbh.
and by woobification, i mean exactly what you’ve already pointed out— the people who will say l’manberg purposely villainized dream, the people who will say wilbur faked his mental illness to manipulate dream, the people who are pretty much always talking about how badly dream was treated by people who were acting only fairly for themselves, usually.
for example people who act like dream was a perfect peacemaker before tommy showed up, or that tommy started most conflict. these are just actual lies that are told by c!dream himself to justify his abuse of tommy, and people fall for them incredibly easily because not a lot of people watched early dsmp and know that truthfully it was chaotic even then, and that dream was chaotic too. not to mention wilbur soot tried very hard to secede peacefully with l’manberg and dream jumped directly into war with no warning. and then people say he was forced into their war when, no, he started it.
theres also people who will say like, dream and sapnap for example are such good friends. i’m sure they cared for each other, but dream on multiple occasions has done horrible things to sapnap with no regard for his feelings (like leading fundy to sapnaps pets during the petwar, leading tommy to sapnaps pets during the other petwar and encouraging him to kill them, handing mars over to tommy to use as leverage against sapnap, etc). george he’s been less awful too but he certainly spoke over him and ignored his feelings enough that george felt hurt. he had places in his hall of attachments for beckerson and mars. george and sapnap were right to walk away from being treated like that.
there’s also what you just said here — “dream puts on a villain persona for tommy”— but honestly he acts like that around quite a few people (example: eret) and it’s usually when he’s revealing crucial info, which leads me and many others to believe that ‘persona’ is actually a more truthful version of him.
there’s the fact that he really isn’t safe for people to be around (or at least he wasn't before the prison) because he was planning to come up with ways to control every single person by stealing and threatening their attachments (some of which were not items but were living animals, or a real breathing person).
and then people will say dream was doing exile to enforce rules, or to keep the peace— when it’s very clear in canon it was a deliberate plan to get tommy on his own and into the prison. (from the way he was framing tommy for multiple crimes, and having sam set up the prison, and kidnapping tommy instead of correctly exiling him, all at the same time).
not even going into how he wants to kill and revive people for fun or make tommy immortal.
it’s just— ignoring all these actual facts and saying “oh he misses his friends, let’s get him some friends now” reminds me of like. when people would put flower crowns on pictures of serial killers. and then, there’s hardly anyone on the server who wasn’t subject to dream’s plans, so there’s absolutely no one i would be okay with him interacting with.
just remembered about the torture thing, and wow i still hate it so much. it’s someone’s sick revenge fantasy twisted into a way to get a manipulative villain sympathy, and it’s just gross to me on every account. i do think dream is traumatized-- just not by l’manberg, which was a conflict he started on his own terms. i would think l’manberg did affect him, because he was scared of losing control.
i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again— my ideal ending for dream would be for him to be sent far away from dsmp to an island full of therapy animals and super strong therapists who have never met him before. and for him to get a shit ton of therapy until he becomes a halfway normal person. and then eventually he could get integrated into society again; but a different one with new people. (although maybe dteam + bbh + puffy can visit him, they might still like him.)
none of the people on the server (who have all been affected by dream) should be burdened with befriending him or rehabilitating him— look how that turned out with sam! sam had a personal grudge towards dream and it ended with the poor dude being tortured every day; and sam himself falling into corruption and literally cutting off his boyfriends arm. like we can all see thats fucking awful right?
no one who was affected by dream should have to deal with him ever again. and contrary to popular belief, that includes a LOT more people then just tommy. dream isn’t just tommy’s antagonist, hes almost everybody’s.
the only person on the server who might also be able to stand to help dream is techno, and that’s from sheer lack of ability to give a shit. but techno is probably THE furthest thing from a good therapist there is lol, and dream needs better then that.
this kind of just ended up being a rant about my thoughts on c!dream, so im so sorry op. especially since it was probably negative for you. i hope you’re doing very well.
i guess in the end it’s true what you said— people will highlight or ignore things based on what characters they like, and it’s especially easy to do in this fandom, where half the content doesn’t even get watched and then we become a big echo chamber of half-truths.
considering dream has hurt so many of the characters i care about, i almost can’t understand how he could be someone’s favorite or comfort character— but he is nonetheless, and it would be unfair of me to be rude about that.
essentially it just bothers me to see someone who was a perpetrator of accurately portrayed abuse and manipulation (using both those words in their actual definitions, not just as random buzzwords lol) being given the flower crown edit effect. especially since he’s hurt the characters i care about a lot.
ANYWAY all of that being said (this got LONG im so sorry op) i am so so excited to get dream’s pov, because although i disagree with his actions strongly i actually find dream’s character very interesting and cool, and watching his POV is going to insanely fun. i cannot wait to see what theories get confirmed or denied
ALSO incase it wasn’t clear this is all /nm at you! you seem lovely and smart, and neither of us can help what characters we get attached to :]
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Text
warning: suicidal thoughts
An anon sent me an ask but the content might be unsettling / triggering to some of you, so I wanted to put it under keep reading and you can choose for yourself if you want to read it or not.
Remember, I'm not a doctor. I probably need therapy way more than you (you're reading the smut, I'm writing it XD).
I'm just a person. But there was a time, long ago, when I wanted to scream into the abyss and I really wished the abyss could scream back.
It never did.
But this time is different, because this time someone chose me as their abyss and I'm choosing to scream back.
from anon:
What you write hits me so hard. The use of mental health is amazing and it makes me feel better to know someone else goes through this...but I wanna scream. I'm so alone. I don't want these thoughts anymore but its a weight I've had on me for weeks and I've nobody to talk to. Literally, no one. My friends have school in the morning, my parents don't want me to go downstairs. I'm in bed and I don't like this anymore.
I'm not expecting you to answer this post especially as its an anon one and you cannot privately answer because then it will have to be public and thats just an odd thing to have on your page but jesus... I needed to rant. I don't even know you and you don't know me.
But it hurts.
Everything fucking hurts and I don't wanna put up with it anymore. I will try my hardest not to end everything but its so fucking hard. I don't even know if I'm strong enough anymore.
I'll try not to.
I don't need to burden a stranger with my death....heh...
Sorry, I'll stop this stupid thing now.
Idk if I should even send this. Oh well...Imma do it anyway.
Also I hope you have an amazing day. You are a great human. :) Be Happy ~
Ah, where to begin.
All of my works have a part of me in them. There are bits and pieces of my story, my thoughts, my feelings, mixed with fiction. Even if you collected them all, you wouldn't know everything about me. I have avoided certain parts, deliberately been vague, chopped up and rewrote things.
You didn't come here for me. You came to read BTS smut (yeah, I see you, you ain't sneaky about it). You came to imagine choking on Jeon Jungkook's dick or getting fucked by Min Yoongi (or literally any other member; I'm just listing the two I write about most lol).
But I'm the writer.
And I can't help but put part of me in everything I write.
I know this feeling, the loneliness you speak of, even if you think I don't.
I don't know what it's like for you, but for me, it was always this way. Ever since I could remember, being surrounded by people and still feeling utterly alone was there. My childhood? Kinda shitty. The details don't matter - what matters is that the only solace I had was reading books. I read so fucking much when I was a kid, because I could not stand the loneliness that seemed eternal. I felt pain and I didn't know if it was because someone inflicted it upon me or if it was because I was doing it to myself, thinking that was what I deserved.
So I read.
And I started writing myself.
For me, this is solace. This is the place I can be anyone, anything, and I can create a world that is all mine. It is still lonely. Maybe even pathetic. Think about it, I'm literally writing porn about dudes in South Korea who don't know I exist and pretending they care about me (I'm aware that they don't). If they knew, at the very least they would be disappointed in me. Disgusted, or worse.
I've accepted I'm not a very good person.
But I also think that, maybe, just maybe, someone out there reading my stuff takes a pause and forgets about their worries, their fears, their sadness, and they feel 1% better. Maybe. I don't know. I'm not you. Maybe someone out there reads my stuff and they fall asleep dreaming about fucking BTS instead of being awake all night thinking about their pain.
Therapy? Mmm, a big stretch.
But it's something.
I'm not trying to save the world one BTS smut story at a time (LMAO what if that was my tagline tho). I'm just trying to work through my mind, my pain, and I'm posting it here. Maybe it helps you. Maybe it doesn't. Maybe you're only here to learn how to suck dick (I do write a lot of blowjob scenes, but honestly, it's practice XD).
The number of times I have typed and wanted to say something about myself to you, my readers, and then deleted it because I think, "nobody cares about you, they just care that you write porn."
It is reflected in this part of head+heart
“They’re taking so much from you... You keep giving. That’s dangerous. Their selfishness will hurt you. They’re think of you less and less as a person and more and more like a factory. They’ll treat you like a thing they’re entitled to and not like a human being with feelings.”
I'm not saying that's all of you. In fact, if you've read this far, it's definitely not you. But it exists. Not just me, but for BTS too. Anybody who is a creative goes through this feeling.
I am going to do what I continue to do. I won't pressure you into reading. I won't tell you how to live your life. I won't give you meaningless advice that you can't listen to right now because you're visiting the dark place and even good advice can get twisted there, morphed into something it's not because your mind is tricking you.
Life is cruel. Unfair things happen. You can't control it.
There are many paths in life. Everyone has good and bad in them. "Who said people are animals of wisdom? / For me, obviously, we are animals of regret." And yet. "There is nothing permanent in the world. / Everything is just a happening passing through." Happiness is not forever, but neither is pain. The you of right now is not permanent.
Living just to chase a perfect life will leave you unfulfilled. Living for the sake of living is harder. It seems meaningless. Happiness is so fleeting when pain is so crushing. Living to get hurt, living just to float along, living to constantly have to decide what is good and what is bad, only to figure out that the only person who can determine those things is you, because this is your life.
The only person who can live your life is you. You are the only person who can see your tomorrow. So, I ask you.
What if you live like that?
:)
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