#also its funny that hes the only one with a unique model

[whats-an-absurdly-long-username]

no i dont have a favorite.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

last set of tsumsitter ssr groovies 👀

THE TIME HAS COME

First is Pomefiore!! (Edit: The initial version of this Groovy is on the left; Rook is missing the golden Pomefiore markings on his robes. There was an update to fix this. The updated version is on the right.)

The trio is framed by a border of colorful lights, which reminds me a lot of old-fashioned movie theater signs (though not as colorful). If you look closely at the top and bottom, it seems they are posed for a candid photograph and it’s being posted to Magicam or something?? Rook and Epel look super crisp here, which I love!! I think Epel is posing with his hands held behind his back. This paired with his smile and the slight bird’s eye view of his face makes him look super cute please don’t beat me up for saying that, Epel. And Rook is being showy and familiar as usual, even putting one hand on Vil’s shoulder. Vil isn’t cringing or uncomfortable with it, which goes to show that he and Rook are truly good friends.

As for Vil, it’s rare to see him posed casually like this. Most of his cards feature him posed in very “model”-like and mature ways, so to have just one hand on hip, leaning forward slightly, and gripping his grimoire is unique for him (I mostly associate this pose with Ace, lol). His smile is quite casual too—it’s not quite the full catty smirk he has in his live2D model, it’s a lot more subtle and playful.

BahacTeHWWRVwkkwwm YHE VIL TSUM STeALS THE SHOW ThoUGH 😭 (You can tell it’s smiling despite the lack of a visible mouth) from how its eyes!! The placement of the Tsum is also funny. With Pomefiore’s peacock throne in the background, it forms sort of an angelic halo around… the sentient stuffed toy… Proof that Tsum Vil is a heavenly being/j

Next is Ignihyde!!

The Shroud brothers return to Cyberspace, that blue void with tons of ethereal floating screens, particle effects, and code www I don’t know what those three pink balls of flame are in the background, but there being three of them is a consistent theme for Ignihyde. Three pink fireballs, three Shroud brothers, three heads of Cerberus! I wish I could say more here, but I’m basically a Malleus when it comes to tech—

Idia’s pose isn’t anything we haven’t seen before (just at different angles of it, I suppose). But!! It feels different here and adding Ortho definitely adds to it. The Pokémon trainer energy of the initial art carries over to the Groovy. Idia looks like a smug, tough trainer looking down on you with a cocky grin and his face half-shadowed.

Ortho floats almost menacingly next to his big brother, his face entirely shadowed. His aura is like a phantom (fitting) or even like a Pokémon on standby waiting for the chance to fire off a Hyper Beam. This might be me overthinking things, but I wonder if the amount of light on the brothers’ faces references the original Ortho. Robo!Ortho’s face is entirely darkened because his parallel has passed on. Idia’s face is only partially shadowed because while he was close to stepping over to the “other side”, he ultimately found hope and was able to continue living, this time for himself and on his own terms.

I LIKE HoW TSUM IDIA HAS ITS OWN sCREEN TO WORK OFF OF TOO 😭 IBRO IS MAkING A sUS FACE TOO, IT’S GLEEfUL AbOUT WhAtEVRr it’S UP TO… That makes me think that it’s hard at work… I dunno, hacking something systems fnksgwiwozlapaeb Watch out, a Tsum near you might infect your computer and then bounce away happily after ruining all your programs and files.

Last but not least… Diasomnia!! THIS ONE’S MY fAVORITE OF THE SSR TSUMSITTER GROUP, WHICH I WAs NOT EXPecTING AT ALL 🤡

The violet backlight is fantastic—it adds an interesting lighting to the illustration and highlights the green flames and Silver and Sebek’s bright eyes. And speaking of Sebek and Silver, LOOK AT THEM JUST LOOK AT THEM???????? More specifically, Sebek’s arms (they look ultra meaty somehow) and Silver’s whole face(that lopsided smile??? HELLO?????)!! On either side of Malleus like that… Peak bodyguard, I REPEAT, PEAK BODYGUARD

With Lilia bringing up the rear, the three form a perfect squad to surround and to protect their liege. cbsjsbevejwlw I like that Lilia is different than Silver and Sebek; he’s hanging out upside down (as he usually does) and bears a huuuge grin, completely having fun in the moment. (… How does his hat stay on like that when he’s fighting gravity though?)

Up front and center is Malleus of course! He’s wielding his spindle staff like a king might a scepter. This with his fierce face gives the impression of a leader marching into battle with his retainers. You get a real good shot of his teeth and reptilian eyes here which I’m sure the Malleus stans are going feral for right now—and with the limelight shining down on him, he looks almost hopeful for once instead of downtrodden or gloomy.

THE TSUM MALLEUS LOOKS SO FUNKY PLACED tHERE cnsnwveuxvDFsFjqk Just. Cheekily There on Malleus’s shoulder… Because Maleficent and Diablo is a known combination, the image of those two as master and minion comes to mind. Imagine Malleus blasting you with lightning, pausing to listen to his Tsum whispering a suggestion into his ear, and then telling you the Tsum has advised that he blast you with a second strike 💀

Aaaaaah, the Tsumsitter SSR Groovies are some of the best in this game 😭 So glad they’re finally over though, it’s stressful saving rolls for what you know would be a limited event with multiple SSR banners, lol

[ladysomething]

not really unique but maybe some kind of actors/movie star au where max and charles are the two it boys of hollywood and therefore have always been pitted against each other as rivals. however, they’re casted together in a movie with an esteemed director that neither want to refuse. then they fall in love woopty doo !!

firstly it's not your job to make the concept unique! that's on me baby! so don't stress about it, and I love this idea!!

also... this one got so long haha

ok so to keep the past tension, for sure they were on like. a Disney channel show together growing up. pit against each other like Zendaya and Bella Thorne.

they were playing best friends and had amazing chemistry, but secretly couldn't stand each other. Max is definitely a repo baby, whereas Charles is so pretty he gets a lot of opportunities. they both resent each other because of it: Charles thinks Max gets everything because of his dad, whereas Max thinks Charles get everything because he's pretty.

eventually they have a big fight on set, and the show gets shut down because of it. maybe they get physical - maybe they just refuse to work with each other anymore

Max is the first one to rebuild his image - he works and works on as many movies as he can, trying to only be in Serious Dramas so people know he's a Real Actor

whereas Charles kind of disappears from acting for a while and instead turns to modelling

cut forward, they're both very successful in their fields. Max already has an Oscar, whereas Charles is getting brand deal after brand deal

and then, like, Scorsese or Greta Gerwig or somebody incredible goes to Charles and pitches a movie to him

some kind of really angsty, dramatic, gay love story set on the Italian coastline (heh heh, just because I think I'm funny, let's make the movie be based on Give Me That Fire lmao) (even though that was set in London) (lets make it GMTF but set in a restaurant on the Italian coastline lol)

anyway so Charles turns them down at first and says he doesn't act anymore, but Greta Gerwig is like, "No, I want you in this part, and you can have first pick of your co-star."

So Charles, "I want Max."

Max is tentative at first, doesn't want to work with Charles, but Gerwig says that Charles picked him and so Max ends up agreeing

it's super awkward between them at first, so they end up having to do some bonding exercises to try and ease the tension, and while they do it they apologise to each other for their behaviour as kids and congratulate each other on their successes

filming is much smoother from there, and Charles and Max end up admiring each other's skill

Charles appreciates how hard Max works, and how much more he achieved that his than his father, while Max is impressed with how good Charles still is even though he hasn't acted in years

they end up kind of being like ... "Hey, you're not too bad?" and spending a lot of time together outside of filming

maybe Charles spends a couple nights in Max's hotel room

they film that really intimate sex scene from GMTF and afterwards they're both so emotionally spent but also a little turned on from the tension and the kissing, even though its a Film Set and they're not actually that sexy to film

Max absolutely falls in love first - he realises what he's feeling for Charles, and pines hopelessly from a distance

meanwhile Charles is terrified of being Known and Knowing Somebody, and he can't let himself fall in love

but Max is so sweet and charming and the more time they spend together they more he realises just how wrong he's always been about Max

anyway, by the end of filming they're both hopelessly in love but neither have admitted it

they part ways, Charles going back to modelling, Max moving on to his next movie, and then they're reunited for the press tour

they end up confessing their feelings during the tour and having an intense affair, but at the end of it they decide to go their seperate ways because of how busy they both are ... though obviously neither of them actually want to seperate. they just think the other person does.

anyway the movie comes out and everybody loves it, they praise their acting and the range of emotions Charles showed and how well Max embodied this lonely chef and the chemistry the two of them had and how well it told the story of these people who had been in love and who's relationship had fallen apart, but then who had wanted to try again anyway despite it (yeah obvi it's a metaphor for Charles and Max's relationship in this universe too haha)

it ends up getting nominated for a bunch of Oscars, and Max gets nommed for best actor and Charles for best supporting actor

idk if Max wins but Charles definitely does

and at the after party they find each other and it's just inevitable, really, that they'd kiss again

anyway from there they'd basically just make it work, because they admit they're in love and want to give it a go, so they do

Max keeps acting, and Charles gets to choose between modelling and acting, whatever he wants. idk exactly how it would end aside from them being very happy!

[cashweasel]

🏨 gimme those blorbo rooms fdsfdsfsfsd, since it’s Pinterest can I ask for more than one? XD if so ima ask to Karimas and Shaheens OH and also Gideons (low key I know what valens/yazans looks like but its a good excuse for u to get to share) so if u want to Valens and Yazans wild be fun 😌

K BYEEE <3 😘

LOLL im glad you asked and yes i will give you all of them 😌😂😂

Karima: she’s obsessed with collecting room decor and she has a crochet corner, half of her decor is crocheted too honestly 😂 I think she also has a thing for animal print stuff esp curtains and pillow cases, she’d keep small ceramics stuff she made with daemon everywhere

Shaheen: idk why it was funny to imagine his college dorm lol he uses space very efficiently also his desk is very important 🧠

Gideon: his room is so big and so empty but he’s barely home so who cares, the only notable thing about it besides the diabolical toys collection on display is the display cabinet he keeps all his medals, plane models, pictures, uniforms etc in

Yazan: yazan’s room as you know is a Dumpster 😂 it’s impossible to find anything in there and it’s never tidy, also so many posters and records + ofc drum corner

Valen: very pretty but his room is an entire house in itself you need directions to where everything is 💀 Texas king bed with a canopy, mirror above bed/on ceiling, maximalist unique decor and very beautifully coordinated color wise. Also huge portraits of himself obviously lol

[OC headcanons: Picture Edition!]

[ms-scarletwings]

I am sorry to bother you but I have to say, I feel Dib got treated too harshly most of the time. It's the point of the story yes but at times it just feels flat out sadistic for no reason.

It's why the Gargantis Array comic storyline sucks to me, it was just two issues of buildup to make Dib a gross fat joke and humiliate him across space. Jhonen just really seems to love torturing Dib more than anyone and it's rarely even deserved.

Oh, this is the opposite of a bother, friendo!

I actually have a lot of reading to still do on the topic of the comics. I’m woefully only really up to good knowledge about issues 46-49 and a lot of bits of pieces otherwise. If what you’re saying rings true, that is sad to hear, but pretty interesting still. I’ve always in the back of my head been a little afraid that Dib’s karma could be flanderized to the point of making him a butt monkey. Especially when we all know that’s supposed to be Skoodge’s job! (waka waka)

As for the show, honestly? I think they managed the balance just fine. It’s not so much that the show was specifically cruel to him, but that sadism broadly was one of its central themes and there were no efforts made to exclude Dib from that. And why should they have? He’s not an innocent woobie, and in fact is actually in the seat of a very ambitious antagonist against the real main character’s goals. Arbitrary events of misfortune and pain were the bread and butter of the series back then, and almost no one was spared. Jhonen (who cameoed himself in the show just to choke on a fish and die for a joke) also from what I hear injected a lot of his own qualities into Dib, so I imagine it probably IS very entertaining to him to give the boy the works.

From what I have seen of the comics, that looks like a much finer line to tow. And this more of an off the cuff ramble, but you know what I think??? I think they made Dib a touch way too sympathetic actually. There’s so much more focus on just him and Zim’s side antics, and the more time you take Dib off world and away from the rest of the Earth side characters, the fewer reminders they give you about how many of his problems are majorly self inflicted and how much of a disturbance he can be to society. And, for better or worse, a less dark overall tone in the comics means that the moments of overtly black comedy are going to stand out a little more against the modernized background by contrast.

And there’s another elephant in the room that kind of gets to me, personally. As well as I can put it well, the art style change kind of really affects the lens he can be viewed through. Maybe more than most people want to admit. And I’m not dissing the rounded down, brightened up change, it’s not a better or worse direction from the show… but it is a different one with different strengths and weaknesses.

Like, look at Dib’s early season model sheets for a base of reference.

Now compare him alongside the comic and Florpus interpretation of Dib Membrane. OBVS I am simplifying a ton here, there’s a ton of room for more range than these examples.

I’m not here to say he’s a better or worse Dib visually, he’s still Dib to me! But is notable how comic Dib actually breaks a ton of the “rules” of what kind of character they wanted Dib to be. To put it one way, they sanded down some of his edges and he’s not as apparently “skrungly” as he used to be.

What I like about the change is that it actually gives the better impression of him actually being the lil dorkass kid he’s always been. He’s got a slight aesthetic shift that shows off his unique interests and it definitely sets him apart from Zim, who actually retained most of his own show design. He’s still got some funny lookin’ qualities and he’s so much more endearing

One of the downsides of all that, however, is probably that he’s so damn endearing and as a default.

I dunno if you ever watched Little Shop of Horrors, amazing musical btw, but, it’s supposed to have this whole tragic ending where the main character’s, Seymour’s, long chain of mistakes catch up with him and he meets his demise. In the movie, they casted Rick Moranis for the character, and he played such a puppy-eyed, adorkable Seymour that it made audiences suddenly too bummed out to even appreciate the dark ending. They hated it so much that the crew actually just changed the ending completely so that Seymour gets a consequence-free happy ending with everything he ever wanted. Even though he’s literally a serial murderer of sorts. You were always supposed to feel for him, but not to the point where watching him fail just makes you feel horrible.

I think Dib works kinda like that on a meta level.

If there’s any ruling on what goes over that invisible line when it comes to handling his character, I think Florpus Gaz nailed it right on the head. Dib is never supposed to just utterly break under the weight of his world. Can he sometimes crack? Yeah totally, especially in the “brink of madness” sense. Or if it’s funny. The golden rule is not to give him more than he can handle, and Dib CAN handle a lot of bullshit. He may be a frustrated lil squirt but he’s been at this for a very long time, and it’s hype af watching how he’s not slowing down even in the face of that. Dib and Zim’s biggest POSITIVE shared trait is the strength of their spirits against a world that is ultimately callous and cruel at every turn to them.

Every second you write Dib where he’s wallowing in despair or feeling sorry for himself is a second you come closer to that line and it’s what you need to dish out in wary moderation.

So I guess the TL:DR of what i think I’m getting at here is… it’s all about perspective.

But I really should read more of the comics.

[drifloonz]

would luv more general steven(or s!3v3n) x reader hcs..

i am so sorry you caught me in the middle of vc. some of these. also i accidentally closed the fucking tab and had to rewrite all of this. i hate being a writer on tumblr.

some of these are by my friends. some of them r by me. some are funny. some are serious. Some are all and or both

i just realized these are only general steven headcanons i am so fucking sorry i was tired and it was like 4-6 am. take them anyways i'll edit like a few actual x reader ones in

_______

he doesn't get outwardly super scared, but he DOES shiver or make discontented noises when he's scared. playing horror games with him is kinda funny. if you make him play a vr horror game he will hate you forever and ever. it's rly funny tho.

he tries way too hard. with everything. pre-incident? being a role model, being cool, being a trainer, being a champion for like one month, being stereotypically romantic, etc. post-incident? being scary, being intimidating, etc.

despite this he is still very dorky and awkward. at least pre-incident. it was common. type of guy to lean on a wall but he falls

he wears light cologne. i'd say he wears axe 3-in-1 but that'd be way too rude to both me and other stevenlikers.

pre-incident he trips over his words sometimes, sometimes his tones too flat, sometimes he speaks too loudly or quietly, etc etc. Basically. 'tism.

he's good at clue, the board game.

pronounces gif like "g.i.f" ( like it's an acronym ). please, god, make fun of him for this.

his hands are always cold for no fucking reason post-incident. if you hold his hands in the summer it kind of helps the heat go away. love wins

really wanted a guitar. he's a dork so he does air guitar sometimes when no ones looking or does guitar motions while holding a long thing that isn't a guitar. He would play guitar hero and be absolutely mid at it but blue and red think he's the coolest fucking thing ever for it. This is inspired by somebody elses hc i think(????). if u read this. ur a real one and r so true.

because of this if you actually got him a guitar i think he'd make a small genuine smile. he has executive dysfunction and depression so itd probably take a while for him to actually do anything with it, but he rlly appreciates the gesture.

also kinda has a good singing voice but is better at backing vocals.

he organizes things a bit too much, which stopped during his spiral phase, but for example his pc boxes are like. a living dex, or just by pokedex number. he prob never completed his dex tho. mike though who did/almost did, has Entirely unorganized boxes. after the incident he obviously stopped caring bc depression so like. yeah. so his rooms a little unorganized and his house in general. he will silently appreciate it if you organize it for him.

never allowed miki to have eggs bc 1; gen 1 limitations. idk how that'd work in universe but that'd probably be why it didnt happen in the pokepastas. 2; as you can tell. he's kinda overprotective of miki. also charizards aren't like. very regular pokemon you find and he wouldn't want to breed her with a ditto. and would only want to allow her to if she actually found a for-life mate.

and for the x reader-ification of this in the edit bc i misread the ask, he'd also do it if ur dating him and u have a pokemon. for example, whatever starter you have and miki would b cute. straight couple.. yuri couple.. yaoi couple... love is love and miki doesnt care. its cute and they act all cuddly and snuggly with eachother probably. kinda reminds you of u an steven too

speaking of miki is larger than normal charizards and probably is built a little different literally and figuratively. stevens tall. miki is taller though. at the very least post incident Corpse Miki is. how unique she was did not help stevens rage ( getting a new one would not be nearly the same especially due to that + he would never. ) but it was a smaller factor in everything. also i do not think that thang can lay eggs post-incident. sorry if u wanted a fucked up missingno charmander.

even if the trade incident happened but miki came out alive he'd still go on a depression spiral. he probably wouldn't kill mike in the end, but he'd be much quieter, and would be even more paranoid. would probably willingly move away from mike or separate their rooms at the least. if u were dating him during this time you could probably at least still recover him from this state since its less serious but the tension would be palpable for a while.

mike is your number 1 wingman for steven swooning. he's kind of bad at being a wingman. or he's good at it. whichevers funnier in your opinion tbh. but he knows what steven likes ( at least he hopes he does ) so he gives you tips and tricks for wooing him. or he gives steven tips and tricks on wooing you because he knows both of you n hangs out with both enough to know.

this is a headcanon with basically no basis but theres a part of me that kind of likes steven and mike being born in johto or somethin'. which is why he goes to johto in doors open after the incident. he's running away from his past + kanto + it's his home region. At least for a while. so he sometimes likes to travel around with miki and you there, or to other places.

he double-checks a lot of things way too much. like if things are locked, if things are properly in place, and if wires are properly connected and not fucked up or tangled or broken ( iykyk ). if you check for him and reassure him everythings fine he'll calm down slightly, but his paranoia goes "okay but what if they didnt check enough."

if you told s!3v3n he was being a bad boy like a fucking dog when he does smth you dont like he probably would actually look like a dejected puppy for a moment and sit in a corner ( /j. maybe. )

s!3v3n's got big fuckin shadowy hands. and claws. good for backscratching or massages oddly enough, if asked for....????

steven will try to impress you by playing a videogame and doing something cool. he probably fails or almost fails at it. but its kind of endearing and cute anyways.

he's left-handed ( definitely not projecting ). for symmetry, mike is right-handed. also miki is ambidextrous. How can a Charizard be ambidextrous you ask? You know. For fun. Daisy is also ambidextrous though which is the more normal option.

i mean... steven is probably also ambidextrous with anything other than writing/drawing ( PROJECTING HARDER ).

ultimately kind of silly ( He has murdered three )

hope you enjoy :)

[thetonethetollandthethunder]

Arc of A Scythe analysis, chapter 6-10

—

Chapter 6!

-Ooo! This is the chapter we see the new order scythes!!!

-99.9 percent on-time service…stuff like this makes me wish i was in scythe—

-I find it very funny that the middle seat is just as bad as disease and government, Neal always makes this small funny bits intentionally or not

-GODDARD ID RECOGNIZE THAT ROBE ANYWHERE

-Elegy of scythes <3

-This is fucking terrifying though, imagine you’re finally on your way home, you can’t wait to see your family, they’re all waiting for you, all you want is a nice flight home, and then it’s announced you’re gonna die. Thats fucking scary man

-This scene really shows how fucked up Goddard and is Elegy are, how cruel they can be

-Yes business man, gleaning is necessary, but not in this way, this way is just despicable

-Chomsky is too excited for this PUT THE FLAMETHROWER AWAY SIR

-Oh god Goddard is using the word Alpha, do you think he considers himself an alpha male? I do NOT wanna think about that

-“Yet even in dreams I often find myself gleaning…” god almost all scythes must be so fucking traumatized man-

-Jesus what a good chapter, a great way to start the new part!

—

Chapter 7!!

-Faraday is lowkey a good professor, no wonder you high school au freaks like using him for that /hj

-I for one, CAN imagine Faraday with a mace, he’d look fucking awesome

-Banned weapons are encouraged, that is SCARY!!!

-No wonder a lot of scythes (esp young ones in the new order are bloodthirsty, it’s this cycle of encouragement and being exempt from the rules of society, sure the older scythes preach about gleaning with honor but when you’re young, especially around citra and rowan’s age, you’d be hard-pressed to listen and be much more interested in the bloodsports of Goddard. That’s how he gets you!!!

-Also as someone who has started journaling my scythe journal would be UNREADABLE I have AWFUL handwriting

-Killing 5 people a week, and 260 a year is INSANE!! Again it’s no wonder a lot of scythes are so desensitized to this shit, and even revel in it, you kind of have to, just for your own sanity

-“Good scythes don’t get days off.” *COUGH COUGH* GODDARD *COUGH COUGH*

-“The idea that not all scythes were good was something neither Rowan or Citra had ever considered. It was widely accepted that scythes adhered to the highest moral and ethical standards. Even the ones who sought celebrity were seen to deserve it.” OHH YOU FUCKERS HAVE NO IDEA I LOVE WHEN I HAVE FORESIGHT THE CHARACTERS IN THEIR CURRENT PRESENT TIME DONT!!!!

-“If you do not cry yourself to sleep on a regular basis, you are not compassionate enough to be a scythe.” OUGH THAT LINEEEEE!!!!

-“She doubted rowan cried himself to sleep.” It all happens on the inside, citra!

-“I prefer to see each person I glean as an individual deserving of an end that is unique.” I love how the first book shows how compassionate and truly worthy of the title Scythe Faraday is. It’s that compassionate that makes him stay as one even after the title is gone. Because that’s what he truly is.

-“I find fire a horrific way to glean and would never use it.” ROWAN WOULD DISAGREE OHOHOHOOOOO—

-Its here where I think Rowan gets a lot of his moral code, or at least starts to think about it, to him Faraday is a model scythe, the scythe anyone should strive to be, and when he eventually sees scythes the complete opposite of him, his way of thinking as Scythe Lucifer becomes more clear.

-“I am an accomplice to the world’s oldest crime, and it will only get worse.” AAAA THAT LINE MAN

-“All they do is play games and watch cat holograms.” Oh Neal you really don’t know shit about how people actually use technology—

-I think me and Rowan would have similar handwriting (bad)

-“Rowan found it increasingly hard to parse his feelings about her.” ROWAN FELL FIRST AND HE FELL HARD MAN!!!!!!!!!

-Ben mention :(((((

-This entry of Curie’s journal really fucking hits you man!!! Especially the “I don’t know” at the end like UGH!!!!

-AMAZING CHAPTER AS ALWAYS!!! It’s really laying the groundwork for future character development!

—

Chapter 8!!!

-We get some foreshadowing to Citra’s gleaning method! The theater part if you can recall!

-Also the “No, I lost. Twice.” Is SO funny

-“It was the only time in all my years as a scythe that I had been thanked for what I do.” And you’ll be thanked SO much more soon Faraday!

-Them becoming more violent and thinking about gleaning is SO interesting esp since its so early, just shows how much it can affect you.

-Foreshadowing to where Rowan chooses which Scythe he chooses to glean when he becomes Scythe Lucifer

-GOD you can FEEL his guilt of having to choose between these 4 people!! How horrible and awful he feels to take their lives away as he learns more UGH

-AND he’s thinking about Bias’s unlike SOMEONE *cough cough* SCYTHE GODDARD *cough cough*

-“Does it ever get easier?” Rowan asked. “I certainly hope not,” the scythe said.

-Bradford Ziller is such a shit name lmao

-Rowan not wanting to admit he’s the one who chose him is soooo!!

-“They had bitten her. Good for them.” HAH that’s such a fun line

-Oop! There’s an error on my copy of the book! There’s a quotation mark at the end of “How was any of this fair?” When there shouldn’t be because it’s not dialogue! Interesting right?

-Even if he has a stupid name, you can really feel the terror and panic on Bradford, really good stuff

-The fact he wants to be aware and awake when he dies is sooo interesting man

-Rowan and Citra’s love is continuing to blossom!!

-“I fear for all of us if scythes begin to love what they do.” *STARES AT GODDARD*

-Amazing chapter as always!! Two more to go!!

—

Chapter 9!!

-Esme!! I always remember her being an underutilized character, let’s see if I was right though!

-Idk why but I hate mentions of food, esp greasy foods in books, makes me ick a lot idk I’m weird

-“Well, she could learn self-control tomorrow. Today she wanted pizza.” ICONIC LINE!! Such a mood!

-Luigi mario :)

-Elegy of scythes are back!!!

-Oh Esme there’s gonna be *so* many mass gleanings later on you have NO idea

-VOLTA

-Esme you’re life is gonna be FUCKED GIRL YOU HAVE NO IDEA!!

-A utopia where everything is perfect would be boring, most ppls lives in Scythe are boring, that’s what I think makes Scythe interesting compared to other dystopian books because its a utopia that turns into a dystopian whilst giving ideas of how that utopia itself was already a dystopia even if it wasn’t a tradition one

-Shorter chapter! Still good tho, not as interesting as others however

—

CHAPTER 10!!!!!

-TYGER!!

-Rowan you’re scaring people—

-Rowan’s disobedience is what makes him soooo interesting to me mam!!

-Lmao Rowan is worried about Tyger stealing Citra, already getting jealous!

-Apparently ppl ship Citra and Tyger which…I don’t see??? At all????

-We get some more Citra-Rowan interactions!! Very nice!!! Makes my Citran heart happy <3

-Emo-Nanites <3

-“We are not the same beings we once were. So then, if we are no longer human, what are we?” UGH ANOTHER GOOD LINE!!

-Another short chapter though not as short as the last one! Liked it more than the last though!

—

SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG, but here’s the next 5 chapters, those last two chapters didn’t have much but everything else was great as always!! Next time we’ll be doing chapters 11-15! Hope you’ll join me for it!!!

[critical-thinking-is-mandatory]

I find it so funny when stans say that Adrien and other rich kids in the show are "groundbreaking representation" or something because they're not. It's an overused trope that makes all of us appreciate how damn broke we all are because at least "we don't suffer like rich people do". What I mean is, you have Adrien, who's born super mega rich, but is trapped in this golden cage and isn't allowed to be himself. There's a clear link to his suffering and his status as a rich model. He also has an "emotional support poor", Marinette, who is "the only one who understands his pain" and is also "the only one who can ground him". Because unlike rich people, poor people don't have trouble with complicated relationships to their families. And this is very striking in miraculous, every poor person has a good relationship with their family (the biggest family issue was maybe the Luka/Jagged thing but even that got resolved immediately) while the rich kids all suffer abuse. And they do nothing about it not because the writers want to showcase how hard it can be for abuse victims but because they think that's the job of the poor friends they have, mainly Marinette. She is supposed to fix Adrien's family problems for him accordung to the bible, she was Kagami's first friend and had to talk to her mom to let her compete in the friendship game and she even tried to help Chloe's family situation! ... Sorry this got so long, it was just a thought I had and I felt like sharing.

Anon, you're literally so right.

Like, how many characters exist that are just like "privileged child of terrible parent feat. optional heroism or redemption"? I can think of at least 4 in Avatar: tla ALONE. (All of which were done miles and miles better than Adrien.)

Virtually every show, movie or book you point a stick at will have somebody from a privileged background with shitty parents/guardians do something that sets them apart from their background. Virtually every princess archetype is "wah, my parent is so mean by making me get married for the good of the kingdom (my only job). Being rich is terrible."

Like GIRL. "Rich character with sad background" is so overdone!

And Miraculous has got not one, not two, but at least 4 characters who are rich with sad backstories :((( Adrien, Felix, Kagami and Chloe. This isn't even including Lila, Prince Ali, Gabriel or Zoe. And, objectively, none of these characters have any compelling storyline. Kagami I have a soft spot for but objectively, she is also on this list.

None of them are compelling 'richy rich with sob story' characters. Sure, we can pity them, but they're not *compelling*. We're not inspired or moved or awed by them. None of them are original or interesting or unique.

But you're right, anon. They feel like a slap in the face. It's like, its almost like the creators are romanticising the working class. "Oh being rich is so hard, I wish I was like the normal people who work every single day and are so happy because money can't buy happiness."

it's really, really tone deaf, and honestly? Annoying. Like, at least if you're gonna make a rich kid with a sob story at least make them unique or compelling, like Batman or Zuko or Toph.

[imtrashraccoon]

Hello! It's me again with another drabble! This is the first of five or six planned bonus chapters (?). For a slight change of pace, I wrote this one from Papyrus' POV as it seemed a bit more entertaining, but let me know if you liked this or not?

Timewise, this takes place a little over a month or two after the humans fell into the Underground, somewhere between Day 7: First Kiss and before Day 10: Dress Up.

First Day, Previous Day, & Bonus Two.

Bonus 1: Scarfs Part 2

Papyrus finished buckling the last strap, securing his chestplate to his person, before turning to the dresser to put on his gloves and scarf. He was rather proud of his armour, especially because it was unique, thanks to Sans helping him model it after a character from a comic book. Over the years, he'd had to improve it or do repairs whenever someone got a lucky hit on him, however, certain elements had always remained the same like the colour scheme and his favorite red scarf.

Speaking of which, his scarf was missing. He knew he had it yesterday after getting home from work, and after changing out of his armour, he'd put it on the dresser with his gloves like he always did. Had he misplaced it?

As unlikely as this was, he couldn't rule out the possibility all together, despite how meticulously organized he always was. He was of the belief that everything had its place and that was where it should be.

He started looking around just in case. He did remember being rather tired last night so maybe he'd just slipped up? He frowned and shook his head. As if... He didn't mess things up, he was the Great and Terrible Papyrus!

His scarf wasn't in the washing machine or dryer. It didn't seem to be anywhere in his room or in the bathroom either. It didn't make sense to be downstairs, but it was the only other place he could've left it.

Had someone stolen his scarf?

Sans would often try to pull pranks to mess with him, but he should know better than steal his favorite scarf. Usually his pranks were more obnoxious or messy though. Like there would be a ransom note demanding some stupid fee in exchange for seeing his scarf in one piece again or something.

He wouldn't put it past Frisk to take something without asking as they were a child. They may not know better or may not realize this was a big deal to him. Still, they were a smart kid and seemed to have a decent sense of social cues, plus, you were very proactive in taking care of them. There was no way you wouldn't notice if they'd stolen it.

That left you as the only remaining possible culprit. Unlike the other two, you had a more believable motive. He remembered that you really liked how soft his scarf was and had even called his armour cool. Still, you were also smart, as evidenced by how quickly you'd managed to convince him and his brother to spare you and Frisk. He liked to think you were smart enough to know stealing from anyone, let alone him, was a pretty bad idea though.

He found you and Frisk where he expected you'd be - in the living room. Frisk was playing with Doomfanger by teasing her with one of those feather wands he'd bought her. The cat was absolutely fascinated and he couldn't help but smile at how cute they both were.

You were huddled up on the couch with a blanket and a book. Normally that wasn't suspicious, however, you were practically cocooned in the blanket like you were freezing cold, despite the temperature in the house being rather warm. You also hadn't acknowledged him like you usually did whenever he entered the same room. He hadn't exactly been trying to be quiet either.

He narrowed his eye sockets suspiciously and stalked up behind you. He was an expert at moving silently when he wanted and despite how much you hated it, he found it quite funny to sneak up and startle you. Maybe it was slightly cruel, but he really liked how you sometimes jumped from the shock and how your surprise would morph into anger. You were especially cute when annoyed at him and he really couldn't help teasing you about it.

That was his intention this time as well and he was just about to hug you, when he spotted the reason you were this huddled up in the first place. Hidden underneath the blanket was his red scarf, although it was mostly covered save for a gap where the blanket had bunched weirdly by your neck.

"Oh You Did Not..."

You let out a cute little gasp when he wrapped his arms around your shoulders, crossing over your chest and gripping your upper arms firmly. He was careful not to dig his claws into your skin too much but it was a bit tricky as he hadn't put his gloves on yet.

"Thought You Were So Sneaky, Huh, Precious?" he whispered in your ear.

He could see how quickly the realization that he knew what you'd done dawned on you. It was slightly cathartic to watch your eyes widen and your cheeks turn pink with embarrassment. He wasn't content leaving this here though, no, he was going to take this even further.

"Yeah..." you murmured. "I'm sorry for taking it, but I really like your scarf." Glancing up at him over your shoulder, you asked, "Any chance I could borrow it for longer...?"

He didn't miss the way your blush deepened slightly and he couldn't help the smirk that now graced his skull.

"I Do Not Take Kindly To People Stealing From Me..."

He could hear your heartrate steadily increasing the longer he kept you trapped like this. It was a bit strange that you hadn't even tried to get away, even if you were completely trapped, he had expected you would at least try.

You struggled to speak for a moment, opening and closing your mouth as you tried to say anything at all. "...I didn't actually steal your scarf..." you finally muttered. Although it was apparent that you knew how weak of an excuse this was when you couldn't make eye contact with him.

He hummed softly and shook his head. "Then, What Do You Call This? Because 'Temporarily Borrowing Without Asking' Is The Same Thing At The End Of The Day..." He loved the shocked look you gave him when he said that. It seems he'd taken your next excuse right out of your mouth.

You squirmed a little bit but predictably, couldn't get out of his grip, even if you weren't currently tangled up in the blanket on top of everything. "Look, you can have it back if you care that much..." you grumbled.

He clicked his tongue at how quickly your tone had gone from embarrassed to annoyed. That wouldn't do... You were the one in the wrong here and it seemed he would have to subtly remind you of that fact.

"Oh I Care A Lot, Precious~" he purred. "There Are Consequences For People Who Cross Me...And I Happen To Be Quite Creative When It Comes To Punishments..." He could hear your heart skip a beat at that.

"Oh This Was Turning Out Deliciously."

You glanced at where Frisk was still playing with Doomfanger, they didn't seem to have noticed the exchange somewhat surprisingly, but he tilted your head back to look at him again. You seemed worried about something but not actually scared, thankfully.

"Tell You What," he whispered. "I Know A Way To Make This All Go Away..." He could see the curiousity flicker in your eyes and couldn't seem to wipe the smirk off of his face.

"You do?" you asked softly.

He nodded in an admittedly smarmy kind of way. Moving his hand from your chin, he cupped your cheek and leaned closer to your face. He paused for a moment and when you gave him a slight nod, pressed a slow but gentle kiss to your lips.

He was fully aware that his sharp teeth could seriously hurt you if he wasn't careful. Still, this wasn't a new issue, although some of his previous lovers had actually preferred if he was rough, you were much softer than anyone else. The last thing he wanted was to hurt you afterall...

Your skin was absolutely addicting to touch, even if he'd only had limited contact so far. You were squishy and yet there was a certain firmness at the same time. You'd explained that you had a whole skeleton that held everything together which was more than a little mind blowing for him.

When he finally pulled away from the kiss, he took an unbridled amount of satisfaction in seeing how flushed and out of breath you were. It just gave him a small thrill whenever he could see the effect he had on you.

"Positively Adorable..."

He finally let go of your shoulders and drew back slightly, but not before whispering one more thing. "Could I Have My Scarf Back Before I Have To Leave For Work, Precious?"

You were apparently stunned speechless and could only nod in response. There was a hint of a frown on your face though, but he wasn't about to leave the house without an important part of his uniform. Not even if you begged him...

Probably not anyways.

[lets-try-some-writing]

Hi I hope your well I really enjoy your content it makes my brain go brrrr with thoughts

One that’s currently stuck in my hamster wheel is Starscream knitting like a madman and I hope you wouldn’t mind answering but I was wondering the autobots reaction to receiving the items Starscream knits and them finding out about Starscream side hustle? And how Starscream gives them the stuff like does he chuck it at them during battle or does he sneak it to them at random moments or does he know where their base is at and just walks in like it’s normal and aggressively hands them the knitted goods. What does this birdcat dooo????

I have a lot of questions and scenarios running in my head like Starscream does chuck the knitted stuff at the autobots and everyone on the battlefield take real good care not to damage it because Screamer will throw a fit over it all except Megatron he don’t care

Anyways have a good evening/day or whatever time it is

HA! I love this thought! Starscream just straight up waltzing into base like its no big deal is fantastic! I will gladly do a little writing for this!

Special Delivery

Starscream is the self proclaimed greatest knitter ever, and as such he must have every bot bask in the glory of his works, even the Autobots. However since he can't exactly mail them a package like he does for his human customers, he has come up with interesting round about solutions when it comes to getting the Autobots his knitted Knick knacks.

He has a unique way of delivering his "gifts" to each Autobot, purely because he likes watching them squirm. Starting with Bumblebee, Starscream thinks it is downright hilarious to toss his black and red box with a sweater or some other clothing item covered in curses at the scout. Starscream usually drops the box from the air and he always aims for the helm, simply because watching Bumblebee flail as a box gets dropped on him is funny. Bumblebee does not tend to appreciate these gifts and more often than not flips Starscream the bird as he rubs his helm and gathers up the box. Bumblebee will then take the box back to base and hang up whatever Starscream made in his closet. He isn't fond of wasting things, especially when the things Starscream makes are surprisingly tasteful when they aren't covered in slurs.

Bulkhead get's his "gifts" delivered to him under the guise of other things like bombs. Starscream thinks it is the greatest thing ever to throw down a canister modeled to look like a bomb but really only containing his knitted items. He always has a wicked grin on his face as he watches the large lumbering wrecker scramble to get as far away as possible, usually getting into some rather poor positions before realizing Starscream's trick. If no one else is around except him and Starscream, Bulkhead will hurl the worst curses he can come up with on the spot. Usually it ends up being rather pathetic but Starscream only finds it funny as he flies away, prepared to pull the same prank another day. Bulkhead tends to huff, grab the canister in anger, and crush it, not caring for the knitted item inside.

Arcee gets her "gifts" via the cruelest jump scares ever. Starscream knows of her sour history with Arachnid and has made it his goal in life to be as bothersome as possible when delivering her "gifts". He usually attaches the box to one of those human made spider robots and then drives it toward Arcee, usually scaring her as the sound is similar to what Arachnid makes when she is near. Arcee tends to blast those spiders, and consequently the box, into nothing but slag and smoldering cinders. And so Starscream also tosses her boxes during conflict, which when opened, have small spider figurine pop up like some sick jack in the box. These "gifts" receive similar treatment to the ones attached to the robots and Starscream can't bring himself to mind the loss of the knitted item as he basks in Arcee's terrified expression and occasional cries of horror.

Ratchet gets his "gifts" the most tame way due to how much respect Starscream holds for the medic, although he will never admit it. Ratchet's gifts are always politely shipped to Agent Fowler's home address and the agent then brings them with him when he visits the base. If Starscream wanted to he could have left a tracker in the box, but to him that feels a little too much like foul play for his tastes, and so he never bothers. When Ratchet receives the box he always looks at it in distain but opens it up nonetheless. There is usually either an aggressive note or a holodisk with a recorded message of Starscream taunting him. Ratchet tends to sigh, destroy the message as quickly as possible, and pull out whatever knitted thing Starscream sent him. So far he has received several collars (a jab at his loyalty to Optimus) which he has destroyed, a few aprons with all sorts of nasty curses on them, and a few blankets depicting Starscream's glory (Ratchet has given those to the children to use on movie nights).

Wheeljack gets his "gifts" in the form of a high speed chase through the skies when he is in his ship, or during his rapid escape from Starscream who will tail him from the air if Wheeljack is stuck on the ground. In both situations, Starscream will airdrop his box toward Wheeljack, often beaning him directly on the helm when he is out of his ship, causing some canisters on the outside to explode into a sticky mess to keep him from outright blowing up Starscream's "gift". Wheeljack then tends to return to base in a foul mood with either his ship or himself covered in any number of substances, sometimes even glittery ones. The box has to be cut off his frame or ship and then he is forced to take a solvent bath just to get all the gunk off. By the time he gets around to opening the box he only finds himself more infuriated by Starscream's snarky notes and obnoxiously taunting knitted goods. The one time Wheeljack wore one of Starscream's knitted capes into battle to try and mock the seeker via imitation, he ended up getting the stupid thing caught on a rock nearly sending him hurtling off a cliff. He has since stopped bothering attempting to get back at Starscream, the laughs of the seeker are still too fresh in his mind.

Ultra Magus received nothing from Starscream for months, putting the commander slightly on edge. And when he finally did receive a box, it was quiet, no fanfare whatsoever, and instantly a cause for concern. The box is generally left just... hanging around in the middle of nowhere with a beacon attached meant for Ultra Magnus. When the commander turns up to collect the thing he is always on edge as the box is often left just inside of a confined space or an area perfect for an ambush. He brings a long stick with him whenever he goes to get the boxes, the stories the other members of the team warning him against collecting it directly. He then uses the stick to poke the box, often with no visible reaction, at which point he will collect it with no small amount of paranoia and open it there to check for trackers. When he finds none, he will finally open the box, always finding an angry looking stuffed version of himself about the size of his digit... which have exploded a few times, leaving Ultra Magnus in shock. He then becomes hyper alert for weeks afterward, and when nothing happens and he starts to calm, his box explodes again, renewing his paranoia.

Where Ultra Magnus gets his boxes in the most quiet ways, Smokescreen gets his "gifts", in one of the most loud. Starscream has paid a group of Vehicons in high quality energon and a few favors to chase Smokescreen around while on the battlefield and stalk him on patrols. The Vehicons hardly ever do anything besides being the most irritating things on the planet. They will carry around boomboxes blasting awful earth music and sized up nerf bullets and squirt guns. They then use their varied tools to harass poor Smokescreen, shooting him in the optics with water or nerfing him in the side of the helm to distract him. And once they have bothered him to the point of him pulling out his blasters, they will do a taunting dance and yeet one of Starscream's boxes at him. Smokescreen either blasts it to bits or takes the box and often finds knitted keys to the omega lock or an imitation of some other relic. Starscream's goal was for his imitations to be aggravating for Smokescreen, but the rookie in all his social obliviousness has just considered them neat and keeps them on a shelf in his room.

As for Optimus, it is not the delivery that Starscream puts all his malice into, no, its what he gives the Prime that he focuses on. Whenever there is a lull in battle, Starscream will calmly walk up waving a white flag, hand Optimus a box, and retreat to continue fighting or flee. When Optimus returns to base and opens the box, if is always some hideously ugly clothing item or something obviously meant for more... scandalous displays. And yet Optimus, after calling upon his long cultivated Archivist passive aggressive glory, always manages to make the items look good. A monstrously colored abomination of a scarf far too long to be any good is fashioned into a surprisingly stylish headwrap and combined with a solid colored sash to make a rather elegant, albeit a bit eccentric, adornment. A set of sized up human... dance clothing... is cut up and instead fashioned into something more useful like a satchel. Capes covered in depiction actively mocking Optimus's origins in the wilds are reworked, given a bit of fur lining and a brooch. Optimus will then wear those same capes like some terrifying warlord and own every insult sewn onto them. Starscream finds Optimus's work around's infuriating and has continued to try to make something so hideous or insulting that Optimus can do nothing with it.

So far he has failed.

The Autobots aren't quite sure what to make of Starscream's knitted goods, but most handle them on a case by case basis and write it off as one of Starscream's quirks. The human children on the other hand, find every instance of Starscream's boxes hilarious. Miko has a whole scrapbook devoted to the stuff that Starscream sends and how he sends them.

[what-if-nct]

hi hi hi today's reminder is a list of nct members i expect/want to see releasing solo albums (excluding taeyong bc he already has one out, dojaejung bc I have a strong feeling sm wants to push the unit as opposed to the solos, and markhyuck bc i will pay big money for them to take a nap):

1. ten: call me delusional but it is definitely happening by the end of 2024. he can sing, he can rap, he can dance, he speaks 618292 languages, he has the visuals, he has the brand recognition plus he's heavily associated with taem (hit the stage and superm) and i just Know they're gonna push him as the next taemin

2. taeil: at least a mini album before he has to enl*st or i will fucking riot

3. yuta: much like ten - can rap, can sing, can dance, beautiful specimen of a human man, super funny, plus he is one of the most popular members worldwide. it would make Big numbers, but it seems unlikely because he'd eat up nct japan. I'd still love to see it tho, i adore his voice

4. winwin: i just know even in a full solo album he'll end up with a collective 2 minutes of lines and I'm very curious how that would work

5. chenle: my baby. dream has a solid vocal line, so i wouldn't call it a hard carry , but he definitely is the backbone (watch their killing voice, he is the soul of their live singing) of their vocals. the harmonies, the ad libs, and he absolutely kills his own parts, and he's super versatile. this is one of the more unlikely ones on this list but I'd be very interested in listening to that

7. renjun: brilliant singer, i love his voice, he has such a pretty tone that deserves to shine more. also it would top the charts because each and every nct member would buy five of each version just to collect all the photocards. they could ask sm but they wanna do it right. want a fansign call? good luck, you're going up against 20 grown men who would kill for him no questions asked

8. xiaojun: he has never not been the star of a song he's on. take off, moonwalk, make a wish. he's the resonance era golden boy, just a well of potential. the boy is a Star

9. yangyang: universe era golden boy. he's quickly reached Mark/taeyong/Doyoung levels of fitting every single song, and has the unique advantage of sm knowing this and actually putting him on songs. again - sings, dances, raps, models, very funny boy. he has the Range

10. Kun: who's surprised here? honestly his voice is so severely underutilised, it hurts my heart, he has the absolute prettiest singing voice. give him the reins like taeyong and he'll produce an absolute masterpiece

bonus duos bc i thought of some while i was writing those:

1. any/all pairs out of xiaojun, renjun and yangyang: renyang bc besties and their voices would compliment each other, junjun because their unbreakable love cover is the third most watched youtube video in my history, xiaoyang bc again would compliment each other super well and it'd be a fun mixup in the wayv Duos

2. renjun and winwin: i just need to see the rest of them spontaneously combust

3. taeil and chenle: your honour in my heart they are Besties

4. Kun and Chenle: obviously

5. Johnny and Hendery: they would vibe. i know they barely know each other right now but i just believe they would Vibe. also you specifically would love it, and the world should revolve around your wants and needs

Hiiii! Ten definitely has a solo album around the corner. Like he's definitely been preparing for it like if not by year's end for sure in the beginning of next year. Like its just inevitable. I'd even just accept an ep from Taeil. Something cause once Sehun enlists it's only a matter of time for Taeil. Plus Taeil is injured so just one solo song will do. Till he returns.

I hope yuta does a rock album, like its just so him and needs to happen. If Yuta brings back screaming from kpops distant short visual kei past. Like a full rock album from Yuta would be everything. I also have songs I'd like for him to cover. Hatefuck - Motionless in white, Closer - Nine inch nails, Sinematic - Motionless in white, throne - bring me the horizon, I have a playlist I'll just send it to him.

Sweet baby Renjun, definitely needs a solo album soon, his voice is so pretty and needs to be highlighted. Chenle too!! Oooh and a Renjun and Chenle duet would be wonderful. Xiaojun, just put him in the studio and let him go it's what the world needs. I would love to see a Yangyang solo, I loved lowlow so much I need more Yangyang. I would like for him to also cover peach by yixing, it would just fit him. It's what Yixing would want. Of course Kun needs to have an album, it would be a beautiful album of ballads with just one unhinged song that no one expected.

Speaking of Yixing, I need Winwin to really go for it. I want multiple solo albums from Winwin and for his career to really prosper in China, make sm beg him to comeback but he's just too famous and busy. I used to be worried but I need Winwin to get only the best and succeed. But I really feel like SM is purposely holding him back cause they know the power he'd have.

Speaking of hear me out Renjun, Yangyang and Winwin, there's some untapped power there and I kinda need that. We have more than enough proof how good Kun, Taeil and Chenle are together, it's just destined. Yessss Hendery and Johnny would be best friends if they aren't already. And you are too kind but if I had one wish granted by sm it would be Hendery and Johnny duet that's it. Also Johnny, Jungwoo, Jaemin and Hendery there's something here. Not just cause they're all my biases. They're all the same level of weird and a little out of their minds. I don't even want a song. Just put them in a room alone with a camera I want to see what happens.

[da-birb-writes-sometimes]

Lucille/Rose/Angel and with any pronouns (henderqueer)) I'd like romantic, only expecting one but fine with having multiple as well, even a platonic one would be fine! I see myself as fun and unique, and fairly confident to a degree, I like to make people laugh and friends would describe me as funny and smart, but if you want to go based off moots here then the highlights are 'fruity' and 'funky little dingus'

I play guitar and love love music all the way, I model and love makeup and all things pink and cute and considering girly and love going shopping especially if its someone else's money /hj and cooking baking all that kind of stuff, I date to keep around and want a long term relationship for the most part, and really just want someone who will support me and my interests and take care of me, while also being realistic and help me keep a realistic view of progress and ambitions. Anyone who's mean for no reason is a no and I need someone who won't play around or make me feel unloved

I like giving things to others as well as getting things, and it's the same way for doing things together and physical touch

Anyways

I am lesbian for real stuff but when its fiction I don't care really, I'm a INFP-T and Libra, not sure about the rising and whatnot, don't know what an enneagram is either

I like vintage and 50s/60s/90s clothing the most and would describe it as very feminine no matter if it's more gothic or preppy, as for physical I'm a redhead with freckles everywhere and a mix of a pear and hourglass, my hair is shorter and kinda shaggy but im currently growing it out

Well, well, well, if it isn't Rose! First off; happy birthday! *forces your match into a cake so he can surprise you*

Vil Schoenheit

Support, honesty, and care; Vil is there with a realistic yet care-filled hand on your shoulder. He would help you build achievable goals for yourself, reassure you and also hold you accountable. He wants to see you achieve everything that you set your heart to, but will also be there to offer you support when needed. 

He is also in a relationship for the long-term, he would only trust his heart to few, in the off chance someone could burn it, but not you, he knows that he can trust his heart with you, his angel. And in turn, he would take care of your heart with the utmost love.

Vil would offer breathy laughs at your jokes and humour, and if you caught him off guard, even a good-hearted laugh. He appreciates your wit, and may even counter every now and then in a friendly battle.

He is also happy that you’re confident in yourself, but if you ever have an off day, he’ll also be there to build you back up.

Vil has connections with the modelling world but also knows that you should make your own name. He would be your number one supporter and would give you a reassuring smile during photo shoots or runways.

Going with his connections, if you have difficulty finding something your style in stores, Vil will either custom order it or make it himself; be it super pink 90’s fashion, gothic 50’s, or preppy 60’s. He would roll his eyes in jest at the ‘somebody else’s money’ but it’s all in good fun… and if it makes you happy, then it’s worth it.

He would hum gently whenever you played the guitar, adding to the melody but not taking away the attention from the song either. He would also listen to your music taste since it’s a way of being closer to you… a piece of you that not many see.

Vil would appreciate anything you get for him since he knows your love language. He also enjoys going on little outings… just hopefully the tabloids don’t interrupt your date. Because of said tabloids, he would at most hold your hand and kiss your temple in public, but behind closed doors, he would be a bit more affectionate (kissing your freckles becomes a hobby of his).

Hope you enjoy your match-up, and your b-day, Rose!

Also, he would be there every step of the way as you grow your hair out, and knows plenty of cute styles for the awkward stages.

[feralnumberfive]

Okay this may be an odd ask, but are their any planes that you think that your blorbos would like, either in the sense that they’d just be interested in it or they’d actually want to fly it?

I'm so sorry to be answering this like three weeks after I got this, but I've spent time pondering this because I was so excited when I saw this ask! 💖 I saw this ask when I hopped on here during my break to make a post about the weather, and let me tell you when I saw this my heart soared (pun 100% intended). I've been trying to figure out what blorbos I want to use and what planes would best match their personality, what they would like to fly, and one that would be their favorite

You may be thinking "Pine, how does a plane match someone's personality?" 🤨 Very valid question, but performance, characteristics, handling, and role are important in aircraft and they all have their own unique "personalities" too oddly enough! I know I sound off my rocker for saying this, but trust me it's true

I'm going to use just three different characters because two of them came to my mind at the mention of "planes" and one because, well, he's the blorbo this blog is dedicated to! I'm not going to be very descriptive of these because then this post would be waaaay longer than it already is, so you're just going to have to trust me on my choices 👍

First we'll start off with none other than Mr. Luther Hargreeves!

Something neat about the show is that it actually shows us what kind of aircraft Luther is interested in! In his room we can see multiple aircraft models and paintings. From what I have seen these include a: Spitfire, B-24, B-52, Lancaster, A-36/P-51A, Ju-87, Short Sunderland, a handful of little made up airplane trinkets, and a USS Macon (ZRS-5) airship.

He also has a few rocket models, but I'm not really going to pay attention to those and more so focus on the planes instead. Excluding the last two items I mentioned, we can notice two interesting patterns amongst these aircraft models and paintings.

All of these models are of WWII aircraft, besides the B-52 and ZRS-5, so Luther really likes aircraft from WWII!

He likes Allied aircraft! The Ju-87 is the only Axis WWII aircraft out of the bunch. He especially loves Commonwealth aircraft. He has two different paintings of Spitfires, the Lancaster model, and the Short Sunderland model, which were all used by the Commonwealth (and sometimes other Allied countries but I'm not going to make it complicated)

So I'm going to give Luther the Supermarine Spitfire (no specific variant) for his favorite plane since he has three of them amongst the two paintings in his room.

I think Luther would then love to fly the X-15 since he likes space/rockets too and the X-15 is a rocket powered plane used by NASA

And finally, I think the Bristol Beaufighter best matches Luther's personality. The funny thing about this plane is that as soon as I saw this ask I knew I would be including Luther, and my mind immediately associated "Bristol Beaufighter" with Luther though I didn't know much about the plane. I knew of it, but didn't really know the role it played in the war so after looking it up, I think it fits him personality wise!

Next up is no one other than my beloved Armin Arlert!

For his favorite plane, I am going to give him the H-4 Hercules aka the "Spruce Goose" since he loves the ocean and was fascinated by flying things

A plane I think he'd want to fly is the Grumman Goose. Again, it's a floatplane but this one is way smaller than the Hercules and I think it would be fun to explore smaller bodies of water in. It can also land on land too so overall it's a neat little plane to explore in!

The plane I think best matches his personality is the E-2 Hawkeye. Like Armin, this aircraft isn't a fighter, but is instead used as an advanced battle management and strategic planner for its allies

And finally, the blorbo ever, Five Hargreeves!

He was a little bit difficult to choose for since he doesn't have anything related to aviation in his life besides causing the Hindenburg to crash, but since I've been interested in aviation for basically my entire life I know what planes boomers are attracted to lol

Five's favorite plane would be the P-51D Mustang since it's such a hotrod of an aircraft and a fantastic fighter. Like I said about boomers, this is a plane that they love (gotta be 100% honest nearly every avgeek loves the Mustang) Five wants a 1970s Corvette Stingray and while this may not be from the same era, hotrods and WWII fighter planes go together like bread and butter so I think he'd love it. The P-51 is also a timeless aircraft, just like how Five is like a timeless person (lol)

As for the plane I think he'd want to fly, it would be the Hawker Hunter. I think Five would like something that can go fast but also something that isn't too flashy but is still a classic aircraft. I think Five would also appreciate this old plane, that is certainly outdated, but is actually still used to participate in combat just like him

Lastly, and I hate to be that person but I'm totally going to be that person, I think the F-22 Raptor matches Five personality wise. I feel like this is too obvious of a plane to give to Five (I was actually going to give him the Me 163 for this one) but I feel that the most deadly assassin in his world deserves the (potentially) most deadly plane in our world. The F-22 is stealthy, fast, extremely agile, extremely maneuverable, and just like Five it can kill without ever being seen by the enemy. If it does have to engage in close combat, it is a fearsome opponent and almost always has the upper hand

The fun thing about this is that there are sooooo many other aircraft that would match these characters too so the possibilities are almost endless. Thank you so much for this fun ask, and I am so sorry for not being able to answer it until now! If I ever want to ask my doctor about an autism diagnosis and they ask why, I am going to show them this post 🫶

[theteethofgod]

Week One of Random Horror.

Stream of consciousness reviews below (heavy spoilers)

Insidious: Chapter 2.

⭐️⭐️⭐️1/3

Typical that our first spin would land us on a sequel - luckily I watched the first one all the time as a kid so I’m pretty familiar with both plot and characters.

I’ve got to be honest, the majority of my enjoyment of this film came both from how damn good it looks and its commitment to being a Ghost Story™️. The lighting is wonderful, especially for a Blumhouse horror which typically either under light or simply take no creative direction with it whatsoever.

Narratively it’s above average. I am a sucker for a sequel that expertly fills in the gaps from the original and the scenes of Josh in the Further recontextualised without really uprooting some of the best sequences from the first film. Also a big fan of the comic relief of the two idiot ghost hunters trying to contact their dead boss via haunted dice - honestly kinda giving Shakespearean comedy in some places.

Despite some strong scares early on and a very clear love for its neo-gothic aesthetics the film falls flat in the third act. I remember a lot of discourse around whether or not a cross dressing serial killer is transphobic but honestly the bigger crime here is that they do nothing with him. I appreciate the attempt at the twist that the ghost isn’t actually “evil” just desperate to relive a stolen childhood but nothing interesting was done with it and it did feel like the film decided that it was time that you understood that and dropped everything else in favour of conveying this singular idea.

Was it scary? No

Was it fun? Yeah.

Would I recommend? Watch the first one, if you like it keep going.

The Blob (1988 Remake)

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2

The fact that I have gone my entire life without seeing this is outrageous. I believe that I naively dismissed it due to the ridiculous title (I have never seen the original either). Turns out that this is a properly nasty film. Characters are introduced, fleshed out, made funny, gentle, awful, or just irritating and then all are dissolved in a screaming, writhing mess of stunning practical effects. This film has no regard for horror conventions when it comes to violence: children are dissolved on screen and the sheriff off - his acid eaten body floating past the woman he was on his way to rescue in her final moments.

I can only assume that the twist would have been even more effective had I seen the original - the “alien” turning out to be a US government biological warfare experiment feels uniquely post-Vietnam. Even without the impact of the original story being subverted, it was a great reveal that breathed some brand new tension into a second half that could have fallen flat once the blob had used all his tricks (there’s only so much “oh no he’s on the ceiling” a film can make fun).

Was it scary? Kinda.

Was it fun? Fuck yes.

Would I recommend? Yes absolutely it is on youtube go watch it.

Bone Tomahawk

⭐️⭐️⭐️1/2

I literally watched this film for the first time like a week ago so of course it would come up immediately.

I don’t know why but the first time I watched this I was absolutely convinced it was a lot older than it is. Maybe it was the first kill where they just bash a totally stiff mannequin around. Maybe it was because I just don’t associate the 2010s with 2 hour long horror western hybrids. Either way, this film is a lot of fun. I’ve read plenty of debate around whether or not it qualifies as a horror film but I think these people are too caught up in base aesthetics. Monsters come to town and kidnap the doctor, a cowboy, the sheriff and his deputy (who defo have something going on, it can’t just be me), and a sketchy outsider must hunt them down and get her back. The film uses the classic western formula but supplements the Cowboys vs Indians model for Cowboys vs Other, whilst maintaining the native presence as kind of mediators - aware of both sides and choosing, fairly, to say fuck that we’re not getting involved.

That’s not to say it’s some kind of radical colonial horror. Instead I think this was simply included to acknowledge the issues of writing a genre that inherently requires the Other in a period of genocide and displacement.

Mannequin kill aside, the gore is fantastic. There’s one scene in particular that is just absolutely sickeningly brutal and I loved it so much.

Not all that much to say about this one - it’s a slow burn character drama against the backdrop of western horror. It’s fun it’s gross there’s cowboys.

Is it scary? No

Is it fun? Yes

Would I recommend? Yes!

The Omen

⭐️⭐️1/2

Full disclosure: I have tried to watch this film many times and this was the only time I managed. Nothing about this really resonates with me. There’s two main subgenres of horror that never really move me, religious and children/family. I was raised not only atheist but completely removed from any form of religion, genuinely believing that Jesus was kinda like santa in the sense that it’s something you tell kids to make christmas more fun. The idea that people genuinely believe in souls and hell and the like is something that I really struggle to empathise with, no matter how much I’ve tried. I also can’t think of anything worse than being married with kids so the whole Desecration Of The Nuclear Family also falls totally flat. Luckily for me this film combines the two and then goes on for all of time. Damien is not threatening, his nurse is not threatening, the dogs are not threatening. The baboons were kind of scary but not exactly the antagonist.

The priest and photographer both had insanely good deaths - the latter felt a little cheapened by how impressed the film seemed to be with it, but good all the same. The graveyard scene was beautifully lit and I was briefly engaged when he got his arm impaled on the fence.

I don’t like this one. It’s boring and I have nothing to say about it. I hope I never have to watch it again.

Is it scary? No

Is it fun? No

Would I recommend? No.

Hatchet

⭐️

I hate this fucking movie. Perhaps unfairly, but hear me out. 2000s horror is perhaps one of the most cohesive periods in the genres history. The post-9/11 practical effects torture porn dirty warehouses rusty metal and that awful brown/green diseased colour scheme that feels like it infects everything it touches. Controversially I do not attribute this to the classic Saw -> Hostel -> Worthless Derivative Imitators that every History Of Horror book will. Instead I think that we do not pay enough attention to the 2003 Texas Chainsaw remake. Tobe Hooper’s OG commentary on the meat industry finds new thematic relevance in the wake of mass loss of life - especially an event such as 9/11 which saw people trapped amongst the dying and the dead, knowing it was only a matter of time. What is that if not the experience of the slaughterhouse. “Torture porn” (which is a whole discussion in itself) was not about the act of killing, it was about the knowledge that you will die. Combine this genuinely compelling emotional foundation with some of the most ridiculous chinese-whisper warped tropes from the classics (sex being thematically important -> some of the horniest shit you’ve seen in your life, for example) and you get the weird offputting hybrid of the schlocky and the cliche with the genuine zeitgeist of the destruction of the body and sudden outbursts of violence.

How the FUCK do you fail at parodying that. By the time Hatchet came around (2006) these themes had become so codified that if you ask anyone about horror, even now in our “elevated” era, they’ll probably default to describing them (aside from maybe the classics, but that’s a given). Hatchet fails to nail down a single piece of commentary on the genre aside from “sexualised girls” (who incidentally are the funniest part of the film for this exact reason). The villain is cool looking and the practical effects are genuinely outstanding but for a horror comedy that consistently seems desperate to reflect on itself it ends up creating nothing more than a below average replication of the genre with perhaps one or two jokes funnier than your average bottom tier slasher. The whole time I just wished I was watching Scary Movie.

Was it scary? No

Was it fun? No

Would I recommend? No

[mindrole]

lately im properly keeping off my wrist, ive never had an injury (at least not from strain, ive hurt it def though, i got launched off a treadmill once when i was a kid) but i fear it, so i'm being vigilant. i'm fine tho. but its really boring cuz i usually doodle to fall asleep...

but i was thinking like, cell series character designs are really great, i think there's a wonderful uniqueness to them in the design philosophy, but

isn't everyone so difficult to draw....?!?!!! usually i feel like... after the first few times i don't need to pull up a reference anymore, but with the characters in this series no matter how many times, i still look up refs, btw did you know shinano has two tone hair? it's not a shadow.

shinano in fact is up there in difficulty... i think balancing his facial proportions is difficult... he should be so cutes and so adorables but he's not like, karen or izu. the hair is also kind of a challenge, namely his hair after he got a haircut.

the character i think is easiest to draw is ryuu. definitely. i've seen people say hatsutori is deceptively difficult to draw. i agree... even though i feel like by some miracle i understood how to draw him much better than others, he's REALLY hard!!!

the funny thing is, recently the last ryuu i draw, i said "i looked at a ref for once"? well its cause i usually ref my own art. usually it's fine. for ryuu who is easy for me to parse it's usually fine, but i realized recently the bangs were wrong the entire time, so i wanted to try being on model at least once (whether or not i apply it correctly next time is a big "maybe"). also i always draw the bunny ears too short, but that's usually something i am very conscious of (because it is a moe point that i hate that i neglect. MOE IS KING)

of course you'd think... well you draw miwa almost every day... you must be proficient in that? the answer is NO. in fact, he's the only character i am pulling up a picture from the actual game to draw almost every time. CONSISTENTLY. dita's look is easy enough to understand i guess, but the usual look, what's with those bangs?!?!?!!! WHY? i draw his bangs too long, but honestly that's not something i'm interested in rectifying. if anything, i've literally never seen anyone draw him 1:1 to the one picture we have, i feel like everyone struggles. genuinely have not seen any two artists draw him the same. so i am not worried about trying to be "on model". it's his fault for having such a weird wig in the first place. i mean, look, im gonna put it under a readmore and i genuinely want to know if you guys think it's fucked or not. i think it is. usually i have like, the one canon picture we have right, and then 3 of my drawings to ref how i did it, it's a struggle every time. but he's too funny. a character who haunts the interlude and doesn't have a single line in it, only ever talked in the one com report. so i keep drawing him because there's so many jokes to make at his expense. it's very cursed. i think having this blog made me a little obsessed.

for the dita look like i said in another post there's a lot of inconsistencies so i just take what i like. though for the most part i follow the design in the interlude. there's not much to comment about, aside from how i'm wondering where his ahoge is actually placed on his head. i just decide on the fly because i can't tell. it's not consistent between appearances. i won't talk about the scarf i'll start foaming at the mouth im not kidding

not even going into the characters i find near impossible like theodore. i'll cry. i'll be here all day. haruki is hard to draw too...

anyway, here's your serving of miwa's fucked up wig that haunt my nightmares every day because i hate drawing this hair so much:

i hope he DIES in com for this, is he stupid?

i hope everyone finds out he's 60+ years old and he has to hold a press conference apologizing for lying about being a recent ex-teenager

[sugar-petals]

SuperM as Boyfriends Headcanon

↪ caro’s note. extra long version because i miss ‘em. best boys, they’re all bf material to the moon and back ♡

5k words | bullet points

○ warnings ⚠️ 18+, dom/sub play, shibari, female reader, grinding, poly mentions, threesomes, face-sitting, femdom & vanilla, smut and fluff

⌈ ten

— motto: they won’t underestimate me for long.

most of your social environment is gonna be confused by ten at the beginning 

and don’t really get what he’s all about

or think he’s like whatever, some random guy in a tank top

acting peculiar

finding him kind of hard to gauge

some of your family and relatives might even think he’s totally unusual and a sneaky fuckboy making you mad 

they seriously wonder what you see in him

down the line that perception has turned by 180 degrees

as it should

ten becomes more irreplaceable, relatable, beautiful, perfect and impressive the more you know him

he’s not as mysterious and impossibly badass as everyone assumes

his personality is very approachable to you 

and you find him interesting in every aspect, looks to hobbies to background to personal habits

and also opinions because ten is a guy who really thinks stuff through

so you gotta be roughly on the same wavelength 

he likes discussing controversial and complicated stuff a lot for sure

being far wiser than his age suggests 

you are the first to share those things with him until the rest of the world catches up to this gem of a person

spending so much time with you

in the most personal way he can

he takes you to see the floating markets in bangkok, you spend the summer in thailand

wakeboarding and playing badminton

his entire family knows you inside out at some point this shit is serious

it’s very important to him to go back to the roots every now and then

and that you have been around his home city as well

getting to enjoy the area and time together eating the most savory delicacies

renting a boat and paddling you around to the important spots, he can explain any question you have

this kissing is gonna be so romantic 

who needs a vacation in venice when you can go to thailand with none other than ten himself as your ferryman let that sink in

except eating durian there he is, the boyfriend who can do anything!

with seemingly no effort

ten does little kind services of love for you throughout the day

he pours you herbal tea, fixes some furniture (he’s surprisingly good at tinkering), comes home from the bakery with your favorite pastry, does the laundry with your favorite fabric softener

he also goes on a huge shopping spree with you monthly because fashion is key in this household and it’s tremendous fun

you giggle when he puts on oversized shirts deliberately to look funny

everyone in the clothing store will think oh man what an adorable pair

ten will model the living hell out of the entire stock

and buy you the cape you really really want as a birthday present

said item turns out to be your favorite couple accessory

because you can sit next to each other on a bench at the river and wear it

what’s not to love about a portable blanket

of course he will take to instagram and make it such a cool thing, photographies of you wearing really cool coats and jackets

mirror bathroom selfies together as well, with a back hug, the classic

and not just for insta

you snuggle a lot generally

ten is always available for affection

and accepts all PDA

he’s a kitty after all, he loves the warmth of your body more than you know

remember how taemin said ten’s hands are always cold, newsflash not anymore since you stuff them into the pocket of your hoodie whenever you can

and hello sir your paws will be nice and cozy on my waist

or hand in hand when you waltz through your apartment

time for dance is a must

oh my god ten is so good at all of this

although say he’s definitely faster into latin than standard genres

tango argentino, he loves flamenco as well

don’t believe me? ten is a diehard rosalía stan!

vamos

so, no-brainer, expect a lot of dancy stuff 

that escalates into wild, passionate fucking

which probably looks like an aggressive form of couple exercises

you poor sore souls

ten’s lil kitty butt is falling apart from all the “i can handle a bigger one!”-level pegging and you have aching legs all over

favorite position? full nelson

if you ask me ten’s ass is probably so carved out by the end of this you could fit lucas and kai in there from head to toe

this is not for the faint of heart

sex with this guy is extra cardio

and if you’re into that a threesome is gonna go down sooner or later

with our girl lisa

there. i said it

miss manoban in those knee-high boots, grinding her thighs between yours and you finishing off on ten’s face? the fucking hottest thing ever i need a moment wow

i don’t have to tell you how orgasmic this is gonna be

steamy sex life with ten very recommended

⌈ kai

— motto: you’re like a precious rose. i’ll protect you forever.

to be straightforward with you

he is in so heavily in demand it’s madness

to give you an idea of the scale

mark is basically occupied by yuta until the end of time 

but kai has an entire idol fanclub on top of all erigoms

those sharp moves did not go unnoticed

he gets an inkigayo sandwich every other day

jesus christ

if rent-a-sexy-bf.com was a thing kai would be the most requested

his phone would be blowing up with contracts like

and you also have to pass kyungsoo’s vibe check

and taemin’s

the road to being kai’s gf is indeed the way of the samurai

i mean honestly: kim jongin is without a doubt the hardest member to get a date with

this has got to be the most selective man of the entire industry or something

if he likes you he REALLY likes you

and he will be the one showing initiative

because he wants to make it clear he isn’t just spending time out of politeness or something

although it’s pretty logical that if kai was unable to reject someone he would no longer be an idol but a harem husband busy every hour of the day

seoul would be able to found its own village 

kai town

where like 70% of the population is pregnant

but since kai wants to keep on dancing obviously and he wants to lend his heart to only one person 

seoul has to settle with a singular nini family house instead of a kai district

where you and the man himself are a full-fledged household basically since kai’s nieces double as actual kids

if you wanna be a young ass ‘mom but not mom with kids’ and be married to kim kai this is it

does he have a thing for milfs or something

that thought just came to my mind

anyway you’re mommy anyway wink wink

fucking til’ dawn until even his muscles hurt

going raw at the gym together

him cooking the most random food with the infamous waffle maker

cuddling with an army of teddy bears surrounding you

walking the dogs with the sexiest dancer alive 

and the sexiness is only the tip of the iceberg 

we know he’s all-round amazing

kai is the king of figuring out ways to chill out with you anywhere anytime

and yes innocent chilling

...unless you’re in the mood for something else

up to you

anyway

sweet innocent chilling for now... with the stunner... just smooching at best things aren’t going raw or anything

on the couch in the kitchen in the car when it’s parked somewhere in nature

kai takes you very seriously and is a great listener

he’s literally so respectful and open-minded i can’t

he will keep your secrets and stand up for you if it’s ever needed

yes he is extremely caring and invested

kai does not tolerate others being shady towards you

if there’s an instance where you are hurt and unable to assert yourself don’t worry. he knows how to confront others with measure but a firm determination.

kai takes a lot of that responsibility but only to the degree where you are comfortable

i think you get what i mean by that

and he is diplomatic instead of plain patronizing

you have a right to be protected. it means he not only treats you well, but also makes sure your well-being isn’t disturbed in any other way outside of the relationships

outside influences aren’t to be underestimated

and since kai is a godly man you encounter a lot of jealousy from others

a matter he will take into his hands since he knows he’s the reason

standing up for you also means saying no 

to these jealous voices so this is an important boundary he has to draw

that all kinds of hellbent people want to get into his pants and take his stage image too literally is not up to you to fix

kai is there for you to enjoy and love not to defend

that’d be exhausting and beside the point 

kai prevents stress and negativity to come to you

i hope i explained this well he doesn’t do this to be bossed up or make you weak it’s because he wants to make life easier for you

guys being protective will be chalked up as chauvinistic these days. often rightfully so 

but what i mean is that kai support you in all regards so you won’t be at a disadvantage or feel terrible about something

⌈ taeyong

— motto: we’ll take good care. enjoy the pleasure.

he’s the type of boyfriend who will ask you about things he missed out on while he was busy

things um from the internet

while mark literally knows that one by heart already taeyong will ask you things like what the wellerman song is

and you thought it would be something nsfw

i got you fooled

did we forget that the man literally watched nct memes on youtube

taeyong is both even more 18+ than you think but also even more innocent than you think it’s complicated

this man is just hard to describe he’s so different, i mean every person is unique but he’s an original it’s the extra mile you know

anyway

sea shanties

bopping to it all day since he just heard it 

singing it while he prepares dinner based on a youtube recipe video as he often does

he’s the most adorable person ever ever ever

asking you why shanties are back in fashion 

(good question, requires a deeper sociocultural analysis i reckon)

planning to remix one for his soundcloud lmao i kid you not

maybe your favorite shanty 

featuring fast-pace rap and all

creating his own previously unknown phrases and shit like that you know him

palazzo rocco lemon detox flashbacks

he’s hilarious i swear

taeyong will produce his own shanties for you can you imagine

as he says: my happiness is your happiness

watch out he will drop a shanty music video with extra krumping moves

taeyong is a never-ending source of pure crack

prepare to laugh a lot like, a lot lot

how can a man who seemingly has such a serious outlook on life and such a bonkers kinda face be so lighthearted

it’s like he’s peter pan or something

especially since he has to manage like over 20 brats in nct his cutesy behavior towards you as his gf will stand out to you

yeah so to be clear we all know he’s the cute one in the relationship

and guess who wears the pants

that’s always you ma’am don’t deny it

or wait 

not for long actually because they come off um physically

but not metaphorically

because who doesn’t wanna sit on his face tbh

your favorite reserved spot

he loves it

taeyong has such a thing for your body it’s ridiculous

mister lee got a sexy mama

and you have such a thing for the gloriousness that is him

but neither of you will not admit it as openly as other people would think

all there is... is being flustered

baekhyun probably has to play some cupid now and then

and give you some ideas

like gifting taeyong plushies and things like that

baekhyun knows what taeyong is all about so the advice is very welcome

but most things you find out for yourself

by being a little braver with him you know

you walking around naked in the apartment or basically fresh out the shower with nothing but a towel

will shake up taeyong so immensely, he will back himself against a wall without you even pinning him there lmao!

jeez he’s so deep into kinky stuff but easily shook anyway

i quote him again: “born to be cute, i dunno!”

you can imagine the overwhelm when you rub yourself against him like it’s nobody’s business

it’s so much fun to give taeyong a regular horny meltdown not gonna lie

this man was grinding his whole body all over the superm stage and now he’s basically freezing up and drooling

how many denied and ruined orgasms he’s gonna get, so much overstimulation all the way  

you’ll lose count of it

and just how wet you’re gonna be

is a thing for the history books

taeyong isn’t such a big deal in nct for no reason god gave him every talent 

so great sex is obviously in his repertoire

i think you’re gonna break some records for most fucks per week

you know... guys like lucas taemin kai and baekhyun spend more time wooing and teasing and flirting

but taeyong gets down to business

one glance is enough

⌈ lucas

— motto: the hottest couple around.

ah, big boy

you really got this man’s attention

doing nothing much at all really

he probably just saw you walking around talking to friends

carrying an impossibly huge veggie burger munching and enjoying yourself after going on a jog

yeah boy that’s how you catch his eye

they say love begins in the stomach and that is the true meaning

or the nose, your food smells really good, lucas is going crazy, he’s seeing stars and shit

anyway

the towering burger isn’t the only thing he wants

lucas cannot get you out of his mind no matter how much he tries to distract himself 

with more good food, movies, games

fooling around with wayv or the superm maknaes, and working out

he’s admittedly... a little himbo head over himbo heels with you the feels got to him

he’s not gonna say it’s a date he’s just gonna invite you just because

to hang out in the kitchen while taeyong cooks and baekhyun comes up with the idea to play twister

imagine lucas with his long arms and legs bending himself all over the place

fighting with kai who almost crashed his shoulders into taemin who avoided the accident quickly

making you lose a round

obviously lucas will hustle until your team wins

mostly because he’s so tall and baekhyun is so small which is a huge advantage when stacking each other over the map

let’s just face it baekhyun only suggested this game to bite everyone’s butts and to see you have skinship with lucas

which is definitely a successful plan of the leader

yukhei is in paradise 

jumping around his room like an oversized bunny after you went home

don’t lie, you fell hard for him as well he’s just such a presence

emotionally, physically

a gentle but persistent giant

he’ll do anything to make your relationship happen once he knows you’re interested

if there’s someone meant to be a boyfriend it’s gotta be him come on

he will cave in after a while and admit he can’t just forget about you 

not gonna lie

your ex is gonna be shaking in his ratty boots

his poor eyes will literally jop from their unexpecting sockets

when he sees lucas hanging out with you

with his shining blonde hair and tall stature, that perfect shapely body, with great fashion on top of that

looking like your guardian angel

man, xuxi really does

pulling you out of your slump that’s been going on for months

and bringing back smiles and a good time he knows how to do that best

and big big hugs of course

you can imagine how soothing and grounded it feels with such huge arms around you

he will make sure that feeling is always there when you need it

because you deserve that treatment

which means he will come over very very often

yeah get ready for how yukhei is a lot more driven than you think just dial and he will be there

underneath the meme surface is someone very determined who really really wants you

yukhei is chaotic good incarnate but in that area he isn’t messing around

his brain is like: “gotta be with her”

on repeat

he must call you, he literally can’t sleep without tying loose ends together as quickly as possible

no second wasted with this guy, even far down the relationship timeline

i really pity your ex 

i mean someone dating any superm member would drive their former partner completely nuts 

but lucas is a special case

he has that kind of look and aura that makes other guys dig themselves into the ground like wiggling worms or cope by fanboying over him

i don’t wanna make this sound like a competition and yet — congrats on your noodly blondie boyfriend alright

⌈ mark

— motto: two nerds in love.

how to explain this. mark is a perfect balance of a lover, a talker, and a shy bean

with a tendency toward bean

and flicking the bean

you know

cutting right to the chase are we

mark is very invested in pleasing you as good as he can

and defeating his awkwardness

because if we know one thing it’s that he always strives to become better and better like he can’t help it

and isn’t afraid of almost biting off more than he can chew

how many subunits is he part of at this point is it gonna be nct hollywood as well god dangit

back to the point mark doesn’t treat relationships and sex as something static which is a good and rare thing

he does his best and always looks for room to improve

while being very nervous, very bilingual, it takes two languages or more to express what he thinks about you let that sink in

that’s very shaky first date sex while being extremely in love with each other

lucky you

and an afterglow where he plays the guitar for you

that’s so nice 

he can play it while laying down and shit

while singing

not rapping, actual full-fledged serenading

we’ve heard how that sounds in the relay cam

are you dating some kind of teenage heartthrob or something huh

mark will make it very clear he’ll stick around, this bad bitch is here to stay

or actually, he’s a good bitch, don’t misunderstand

mark doesn’t have a lot of edgy in him unless rap is concerned

he’s the kinda guy to get lost in IKEA with 

having a good time 

as often as his schedule permits

you really have to make use of your time together 

this man might as well the busiest idol out there

and you are no different because birds of a feather

you’re both mr. and ms. independent 

out and about very often

so meeting up becomes something special during comeback season

or wait mark always has a comeback going on

which is a double-edged sword but something you both know you signed up for 

which is why you spend a lot of time around NCT dream, 127, and SuperM 

sm’s publicity agents have to work extra hard i’m telling you

a dating rumor is the last thing both of you would need

since you befriend several members you gotta stay on the low as well

but hey the rage of jealous people of the public is nothing compared to the force of nature that is yuta nakamoto

who seriously thinks himself threatened and robbed

in case you are feeling possessive as well...

...you might have to fistfight yuta

to be able to be with mark

who is basically property of osaka at this point

yuta is a scorpio that’s just the way it is

unlike taeyong who wishes his rap buddy the best, yuta kinda wants to be mark’s wingman and see him date, live his best life

but also have mark for himself to fawn over and to adore, to be fascinated by

we get it yuta. bisexual struggles. very understandable

you have to promise in person that mark doesn’t forget about the holy gaming nights with yuta 

which is hilarious since that’s not up to you but mark’s memory

bestie, yuta uses everyone as a scapegoat don’t sweat it too much

regardless you put a weekly reminder on the fridge

so the roaring lion yuta would be pacified

he doesn’t want to lose his sweetheart can you blame him

the ultimate but also most risky solution is obviously inviting yuta for movies 

which will be appreciated but also cause a storm

mark will definitely break a sweat when you start a popcorn war or try to prove who hugs mark the best 

caught in the middle of mayhem is mark lee’s specialty what did you expect

this either ends with murder or a chaotic open relationship down the line

yuta really is attached but who wouldn’t be

it could be worse mark has double the love you know 

⌈ baekhyun

— motto: you wanna know why i’m your candy?

baby tell me are you ridin’?

in fair verona where we lay our scene...

that baekhyun always wants to woo you — his way, which proves to be very interesting to say the least — is never hard to miss

putting in effort is mochi default mode 

no matter what stage of the relationship you’re in

he might as well regularly serenade you under your balcony in the backyard just because

probably singing ‘baby we can stay up’ and wiggling his ass in all directions because he’s a dirty boy gone wild

yeah. nowadays romeo is twerking instead of feuding with tybalt

that’s good for him and everyone involved

you in particular because you get some very racy eye candy

you know how baekhyun is

at least nobody’s around seeing him put on an 18+ show like that

your little guy is one unhinged fella

if it starts pouring he will grind up and down the next lantern and belt out ‘singing in the rain’

you bet he can do some actual pole dance

he’s strong and bendy you know

and loves to gyrate his whole bag of bones like... he wants to hit you with all the body rolls

in the rain

what a freaky man

but hey you wanna stay up for sure 

doesn’t take long until you beckon him to come upstairs

where the only way to alleviate him of his wet clothes—

oh well he has those roger rabbit vibes and you can’t be mad at it

he will play off all his hormonal antics

baekhyun is hilarious

and so perverted, he can keep up with your spicy idea of playing patty-cake don’t worry

how do i know you’re an extra nsfw kinda person?

who else would like baekhyun

he says juicy things all the time

and does juicy things

yes. finally a couple on eye level indeed. 

when baekhyun asks are you ridin’ you ask how hard 

bruh

this is gonna be fun

and remember

beside handing you sacks of money

his priority is always to make you smile

i’m kidding about the bags but

baekhyun is so rich it’ll show in your relationship, but he’s more about the interactions with you rather than the lifestyle

baekhyun didn’t hustle for a bentley he hustled to sing and get out of sm alive alright

financial stability: important

luxury: very nice to have, he can make you the presents you want to have and travel a lot together

but smiles: baekhyun priority

because he so badly wants to know you love him and adore him, he sometimes feels so insecure

of course you do

you always reassure him with your reactions

it’s very important to him don’t underestimate it

baekhyun has always been talking about his ideal type in terms of how he can cheer her up

so even the naughtiest sexy time evenings are gonna be filled with all giggles

anyway other than that your pussy will be dripping

because this guy is as horny as all other members of super m combined

and you have your ways of leaving him tongue-tied and wrists-tied

taemin’s impact

superm isn’t short of bondage supplies we all know that

so yeah. shibari baekhyun is gonna happen

since he does pilates imagine what kinda shapes you can bend this lil guy into

and take some pictures

privé is in trouble 

bondage model baekhyun is bursting onto the scene

you might even run a risque blog that features cropped pictures with him

heh — you think people will recognize him by his body?

nope

first: you only upload HD pictures that aren’t whitewashed

baekhyun is basically never photographed like that

second: who expects baekhyun to be featured on a bdsm blog with his girlfriend

and this is the guy that drives you around in his expensive car with his big black shades on 

well what can i say

nothing is the way it seems

⌈ taemin

— motto: i’ll unfold a whole new world for you.

taemin is cocky, he’s sensual, and: a very smiley person as we know

least boring relationship ever

he will prance toward you whenever he can to involve you in cuddles

touch-starved taemin is a thing

kkoong can tell you about it, he needs kisses and embraces so often

might as well pepper him with it no problem

and put him into your oversized sweaters when he eats ice cream on the sofa, watching movies, and you brush his ever-growing hair

he’s smol he’s gonna fit into them don’t worry

and on the other hand he likes a rough and tough girl who thinks of him like a boy toy

who acts tsundere or like his bodyguard

working out almost daily to the point of sweat all over

a gal probably able to pretzel minho lucas and chanyeol into one giant bundle

taemin truly has the taste of a divo

multi-layered as always

so you couldn’t say the relationship is always the same in sentiment, the vibe of the dynamic could be different every day

we love a complex man

what would be volatile to others is actually an advantage up close

because taemin understands every difficult facet of himself and his partner 

even if those facets might be contradictory

or something that’s felt shameful about

he will accept and listen anyway

the same goes for getting what drives you

taemin is like a walking psychology velvet couch with fancy swirls as arm rests

point is he isn’t fooled by the surface of the world

he knows what has to be known

which also means your looks aren’t the part he prioritizes

and not even outward personality and habit is what he’s drawn to

it’s the mentality and values underneath

that’s true compatibility to him and he can feel it

he’s really really smart

and also finds it important that you get along with shinee and superm, that you think they’re nice to be around and vice versa

especially kai as taemin’s absolute bearly bestie. if kai thinks you’re shady and you don’t like kai either

or if you’re permanently super awkward and taemin’s moodmaking doesn’t help

we have a problem

but fair enough

kai and taemin are basically one soul at this point so if taemin likes you jongin does anyway 

bff telepathy

in fact jongin was probably the one introducing you to taemin lmao!

because he knows you go well together instinctively and he is correct

so not to worry then

and it’s good on taemin to think longterm and not see you as a person outside of social interaction y’know

cough cough he thinks about marriage, you might be ms. lee one day

here he goes again taemin is just very mature seeing you as well-rounded in every aspect of life

without letting his dick make the important decisions at the detriment of making this a relationship of two lives not just two bodies only

but obviously don’t assume taemin is no horny devil. we all know he dreams of the freakiest scenarios and fantasies in this whole group

going kinda crazy about the thought of making you cum which he always wants to try with new methods

which occupies his mind more than a big bowl of super spicy noodles which is taemin’s favorite meal so

at the same time taemin junior is definitely the same clingy attention whore as his sparkly owner

limp wrists from all the handjobs on your side

and very swollen lips from giving all that head on his side

this is gonna be interesting

he puts the 6v6 in 69

equals 69v69 am i right

but i’m serious that’s gonna be a lot of oral action

you definitely ask each other about having sex very often, daily if you have the time and find a nice spot

and how on earth do both of you keep your hands off each other sleeping in one bed

taemin is touchy as hell with no shyness, and you squish squeeze and grope this guy like the mochi he is

ah when things go both ways

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