#also its just july 10 and ive already made like

[mekatrio]

JUMPING IN JOY!!! WOOHOO!!! AWESOME!!!!! i came across that resource bc i was curious about my belief of zelda being more popular in western countries than it is in japan, so i looked around the internet to see if anyone had made any studies or research on that, to 'prove'/'show' whether this is actually true. unfortunately i didnt come across any big study that explored this specifically, but i did find that im definitely not the only person who believes that zelda is more popular in western countries than it is in japan:

i came across that epic awesome resource from prev post because i was looking around for resources about this subject matter and was listing down whatever sources i could find about it. but since im going to be spending my time reading thru the resource from prev post, i think ill take a break from looking for other sources and just post what ive gathered already! this is what i hv found (under a read more cuz its long 🤭) :

- a newspaper clipping on webarchive published in december 1998 that talks about oot's success in the west (they anticipated to ship 1 million units but are now anticipating to ship 3 million units), and that nintendo had spent $10 million in marketing (idk if its domestic or overseas or overall marketing)

- nintendo's webpage listing the top 10 highest selling titles on their consoles from the nintendo ds and onwards. im pretty sure these are the global figures, not domestic. what's interesting to me is that, with the exception of wind waker hd (wii u title that sold 2.37 million units), there had been no zelda titles that entered the top 10 highest selling titles on a nintendo console, at least not until the nintendo switch w botw + totk. and not on this page at least.. maybe theyd be on the top 10 for previous consoles like the n64 and gamecube 🤔

- youtube video Obscure in the West, Big in Japan by Retrohistories that talks about this study; Making Local video game history index by Akito Inoue!!! now this is super super super super interesting to me. to sum it up super densely, basically researcher Akito Inoue goes thru lists in both english and japanese, lists like Metacritic's Top 100 Games and Famitsu's Highest Ranked Games and many many other lists like these, and gives the listed titles a score out of 100. each title gets two scores, one for it's 'popularity' (possibly not the right term) in the west, and one for it's 'popularity' in japan. bla bla bla many statistical contingencies and whatnot, the video and this study explains this much better than i ever could, but essentially this info can be plotted on a graph, where the higher on the y axis = more acclaimed in the west, and the higher x axis = more acclaimed in japan. and this is what the zelda titles look like!

the 'most acclaimed titles' in the west vs japan are so different!!! thats so interesting!!! also this study was last updated in 2018 so thats something to consider. but its like wow.... why is it so different???

also not zelda related but IDC, but this is what final fantasy titles look on this graph!

its so interesting....!! what could be the reason for these disparities!!!! why does the west hate my boy squall!!!

- this site that lists down lifetime sales of various zelda titles, published in july 2023 and if im not misunderstanding, was published by J. Clement!

- and lastly, a bunch of resources from Ishaan Sahdev, who wrote The Legend of Zelda - A Complete Development History which i posted about in prev!! the resources are as followed:

- Breath of the Wild is the Highest Selling Zelda in Japan in 19 Years on the resetera forums, with this nifty graph made from info from Media Create, a japanese company that gathers and analyzes video game data:

- and this article, Zelda: Breath of the Wild is Beating All Expectations in Japan on Sahdev's website which uses this same graph, and talks about botw's domestic success in more detail (havent completely read this yet)

- two other posts on the resetera forums also by Sahdev, which have these useful figures:

- The Legend of Zelda - Series Sales page on the zelda wiki, which is maintained by Sahdev! (would you look at that, there are actual decent pages on this wiki!)

- and of course, The Legend of Zelda - A Complete Development History, which i believe will go into more depth on how Sahdev acquired these figures, which im very excited to read about!! this dude rocks!!!!

[aroaceofthesea]

Anyways a bit of a recap of my life these last few weeks bc its crazy how much stuff ive done what do you mean its only the 14th of july it feels like summer should be ending soon and ive been very inactive on here:

Starting with sant joan lol (aka 24th of june) some friends came over and we hadnt really seen each other in a couple years (like yes but not really really like it was always super awkward but it was super cool this time😋😋)

Then the next day when they left one of my best friends came home too :) he was at the town next to mine and we spent the afternoon together :)

Then we did diving classes with my mom and also some family friends im now an open water diver that was pretty random ngl

Then after like. 2 days. chilling with just my mom (my sister was like 100% of the day every day with some friends that were around) some friends from a summer camp i did last year came over😋😋

They spent like 4 days i loved every day ngl we played cards a lot we went to the beach we did so many things how did we have time to play mao so much thats crazy lol (also so many crazy rules @ ppl that i know irl i have so many great rules to add when we play again weve gotta do iit)

When they left it was sad :( but i had no time to mope bc i had exactly 15 minutes at home so i kust took a shower and then went with another friend to canet rock (catalan music festival) it was super coool :) had the opportunity to see oques grasses live again♠️🪿 (though they didnt play bancals😭😭 one of my fave songs ever)(they have too many epic songs to play them all they need an extra hour at least ngl) anyways it was crazy loved almost all of it (not miki nuñez why did they put that guy in there) and yeah it was super cool

Then i went home arrived at like 9:15 am and proceeded to sleep almost 25h until 10 am the next day im told i missed a sushi lunch with family friends :(

The next day some friends were like who avalon :) so ofc i was like meee (usually during summer im not in the city but i was that say so ofc i was like i gotta go) (just so you gt an idea i couldnt talk like at all like half my sentences were whispered bc i had lost my voice at the festival and that game is like. you gotta talk or why are you playing lol) anyways luckily they guy i had gone with to the festival was also there and also couldnt talk so at least i wasnt alone😅😅

Then i was going back home and on the way home i met one of my only remaining childhood friends lol she went with me to elementary school (or idk what you call it until 6th grade whatever) and plays the trumpet with me and we spend a lot of the summer together and it was nice to see her she had also gone to that festival (its a very very popular festival and ppl my age could go basically for free so a lot of ppl went) and also had no voice lol but it was nice to see her

Then with my parents we went and had a pizza :)

Then i spent the week in barcelona (were talking about this week already) and tuesday a friend came over bc hes from outside but had a play in barcelona like every night that week (he plays the trombone hes reaaally good) so we spent the mornings together and then the afternoons he went there (i wish i could go they were playing with fucking dagoll dagom (catalan company that made famous musicals in catalan like mar i cel and they are closing the company this year😢😢) like hoow i wanna go😭😭)

Then friday i went to my summer home and there were my mom and also that friends brother and father lol so anyway weve spent the weekend together and it was rlly fun

And also like i was looking for cool concerts around here this summer bc festa major concerts are just 🔝🔝 you get to see your fave groups for free and like even if they are pretty popular when it isnt in a big town or a very well connected one maybe you have 100 or 200 ppl to very known bands like its crazy anyway i was checking (using the very efficient method of looking where each concert of each group was and putting it on google maps) and i was getting kinda depressed bc there werent any of the bands i like most and then i was like ok whatever lets check buhos AND THERE WAS ONE YESTERDAY (THE DAY I WAS LOOKING) AT LIKE 20 MINS so obviously we went and like even though i was basically alone (bc the guy i was with is like 14 and he knew some friends that were also close and went too so he spent most of the time with them and i didnt have any friends close) it was a buhos concert so obviously it was super cool also rlly cool bc they are like one of the only bands i like that didnt play at the festival from last week so rlly cool that ive gone to concerts of all my fave bands in just a week i love this (also i was like. 3 meters away from where the tahirt they threw fell😭😭 i wanted a buhos supporter tshirt thats sad)

OH ALSO yesterday too we went to the beach and we played volleyball with random ppl and it had been a whilr since we did that bc they usually see my sister who is very good and they are intimidated but my sister wasnt there so ppl kept coming and asking us to play (we have a net which is like telling ppl pls comee if youre less than like 7 or 8 ppl) and it was rlly fun (even though that one guy was very very annoying but the rest were rlly nice lol)

So yeah now you know basically everything about my life the last 3 weeks

[darewolfdq]

I posted 10,027 times in 2022

10 posts created (0%)

10,017 posts reblogged (100%)

As a reminder ^^^^ I don't post jack crap on this account xD if you like my art just go follow my art blog <3 this is reblog hell <3.

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@birch-forest

@missazura

@quartzwax

@starfleetrambo

@clownmoontoon

you all are very cool people.

I tagged 9,595 of my posts in 2022

Only 4% of my posts had no tags

#hc - 1,512 posts

#saved - 640 posts

#dl - 598 posts

#tumbler - 462 posts

#splatoon - 455 posts

#empires - 323 posts

#pokemon art - 290 posts

#pokemon - 272 posts

#boost - 201 posts

#minecraft - 195 posts

lol lookit all my brain rot.

Longest Tag: 132 characters

#survival ref‚ cursed‚ cloaths‚ videogame humor‚ tumbler‚ humanity‚ humans‚ knowlege‚ history‚ stores‚ my art‚ saved for a rainy day‚

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Link to my art blog : https://darewolfcreates.tumblr.com/

4 notes - Posted July 21, 2022

Hey look, it me.

#4

Hello! this is my trash blog! I do everything on this account so if your just here for my art you can go over here: https://darewolfcreates.tumblr.com/ Its still a work in progress but if you like my art feel free to check me out over there :] I like to tag thing on this account tho so feel free and rummage though my tags. see what you find. This post is a stand in for the moment. Ill make a real pinned post eventually but Ive put it off long enough so here we are.

4 notes - Posted May 6, 2022

How the hell is this one above my new pined post??? I literally just made this as a temporary thing.

#3

See the full post

8 notes - Posted July 10, 2022

Well I guess I cant complain too much about what posts of mine are the highest grossing. I don't exactly post here much... Im expecting my art blogs year of review to be more exciting.

#2

By Plucking one you shall reveal

HEY YALL GUESS WHOS GOT BRAIN ROT!

the second one was actually the first one I drew, the arms were supposed to form Grian’s wings but I think including the ear wing was a mistake because it doesn't translate as well into wings with it :/ oh well. I also liked the idea of like... watcher wings folding out from within Grian’s parrot wings? I really wanted to color the second one but I couldn't  decide on coloring him in with pale colored pencils of making the rest of Grian really bright using more paint pens. Background were done in photopea. Does the glitch background look familiar? its the same one I made for my Pokemon comic xD. I was too lazy to make a new one so i just reused the one I already made. bonus pieces without the backgrounds:

See the full post

129 notes - Posted May 12, 2022

Finally an actually half decent post on this list.

My #1 post of 2022

Cant stop thinking about the moments right after Pearl killed Bdubs and Impluse.

544 notes - Posted July 23, 2022

somehow this one doesn't surprise me one bit. This is like the most traction Ive ever gotten on a post ever. I'm glad to share this brain rot with all you lovely people.

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[woosansang]

i realized tht ive sent u my cats (i think) but not my dogs :0

here!! the pic order is oldest to youngest so theyre crystal (white german shepherd yellow lab mix, 10yo), shiloh (pug, 8yo), and gracie (pug, 6yo) !!

the only one w major-ish health issues is shiloh, she has an infected tooth so were waiting to get her in for it to be removed :( gracie is a chonk (roughly 42lbs/19?kg) and even tho the vet has said multiple times tht shes healthy (on top of pugs having a natural disposition to be fat and the fact tht shes v active and energetic), ppl insist shes unhealthy even tho they dont interact w her..? like yeah sure lets not listen to the owner of the dog 😭

as for crystal, iirc her hind legs actually have two different bone structures-- like theyre literally both the different breeds ejfjfk shes v sweet and loving and im still in denial tht shes gna be 10 in october (bc the reality of me being 20 in july will fully set in djfkfk) the only major health thing shes had was last week and shes already better,, she had an inflamed pancreas :(

uhh as for personalities: crystal is the friendly one! shes (obvs) rly protective tho but for the most part shes friendly; shiloh is actually the laziest lol shes v calm unless it comes down to food and walks. shes also the one tht barks the most; gracie is more on the nervous side around new ppl and will hide behind my legs on walks if theres other dogs around sndjfj she doesnt bark a lot unless shes excited and shes woken herself up. by barking. (theyre not rly barks, its more of a "rly loud rly high pitched yap") ejdjjf theyre all v precious to me :>

omg this is the best present to receive rn bc i'm sick and sneezing my lungs out so this made me smile so much thank uuuuu <3 <3 <3

i tend to like bigger doggos for bigger cuddles but your pugs look so soft and sweet too <33333 i have a black curly coat retriever myself :D ahhhhh i just wanna give them all so many pats!!! <3 :D <3 :D i love animals so so so much especially doggos so feel free to drop pet pics in my inbox literally any time. you have sent ur cats through before yes, but it was with your gif requests so i havent posted it yet until all the reqs are all done, thats why hsdjsd

[ririsann]

TOKYOREV 219 SPOILERS

new theory ish?? its more of just evidence of something that’s been speculated for a few weeks now.

OKAY so yall know how there were people thinking that haruchiyo (sanzu) would be the one who would kill senju because of takemichi’s vision?? i dont think that its haruchiyo anymore but instead takeomi??

because look. 

senju knows that takeomi has different ideals than her and without communication, they’re gonna end in some fight.

though we see inupi telling draken that guys from tokuhara tandai are heading towards senju + takemichi, we can assume that senju can beat them 

this honestly really confuses me since takemichi’s vision has senju dying in his arms at the amusement park, though it technically could be at a different time (with theories, anything is really possible.. thanks wakui). takemichi and senju are both wearing the same clothing as in the present moment, and it starts raining in both present and is [raining] in the vision.

i really dont believe that senju is gonna die to the guys from rokuhara tandai because shes one of the three deities for a reason. obviously she’s gotta be strong

it doesnt look like senju has any blood on her or anything, so i really doubt that the rokuhara tandai guys would play dirty with weapons, though that could’ve easily been a detail that wasn’t drawn so it creates more confusion for us (the readers).

usually im pretty good at making conclusions with theories but this has so many possibilities that my brain is processing.

ive seen a bunch of theories on who could be the actual leader of rokuhara tandai since terano south was simply a representative (unless that was a translation error?? but i rlly don’t think so since it’s so widespread. i also haven’t seen the raw manga at all so i can’t confirm anything myself)

maybe it was an early fight between senju and rokuhara tandai?? who knows i just wanna cry i dont want senju to die and i just wanna see mikey again </3

also july 14th might be important?? since most of the other events that ended with things like death were on important dates

　⊳ moebius - aug 3 - summer festival (natsumatsuri) - draken almost dies (original timeline, he dies)

　⊳ valhalla - oct 31 - halloween (”bloody halloween”) - baji dies, kazutora is sent to a sentence of 10 years, valhalla is integrated into touman and creates the 6th divison lead by hanma

　⊳ black dragons arc - dec 25 (christmas) - black dragons is handed off to takemichi, yuzuha + hakkai are free from ab*se by taiju, black dragons is put into dormancy, black dragons join touman under 1st divison (takemichi)

　⊳ tenjiku - feb 22 - shinichirou makes black dragon gang (?) years ago - emma dies, izana dies, kisaki dies, tenjiku is disbanded, touman disbands shortly after, hanma takes a break from gangs (?)

ill try and search up something about july 14, which is only a week (+ 3 years) after takemichi first time leaped to the past? i’m not exactly sure if it will have any significance, and the tokyorev wiki only shows so much so it’s time to reread and take notes :/

(edit: ill still reread and see if i missed anything but someone already made a theory on the date of july 14!! here, cr to @.BOSSMANJIRO on twt)

anyways that was my rant/info dump so do whatever you want since people have already said this stuff i’m pretty late to the party

[bbarican]

10:25 am // wednesday; july 28, 2021

good morning, tumblr! first of all, how and why is it still raining? what happened to the one day of sunshine we got and then just disappeared?

work today is kind of slow so i have enough time to just write both on here and on my planner

ive been feeling really nauseous since last night tapos after eating breakfast this morning, i felt like throwing up again; i have no idea why, maybe its a pms thing, but i hate it and nakakawalang gana to do anything cause of it, although eating chocolate helped alot though but its not like i can eat chocolate lang the whole day

i also just wanted to come on here so i can write down what ive been thankful for for the past few days and weeks and so that i can look back to this post when im feeling down so here's the list ive been putting off writing cause ive been so preoccupied:

im very thankful for:

my job and how much im learning every single day; yes its rather challenging but its also so so so fulfilling

my family and my friends for always being there for me through thick and thing and kahit sobrang busy naming lahat, pag nagusap naman kami, its like we were never busy to begin with

realizing that i can be happy on my own; may times na id still look for company but i realized na im so much better off by myself kasi especially right now, i only have and want energy for myself and for the people around me that i genuinely care about

good music, good food, and hella funny tiktok videos

realizing that i lost a little weight; its a hard goal to set especially since i have 0 time to work out, but comparing my older photos to theo nes i have now, i can definitely see and feel a difference so atleast thats a good start

the places ive been to na dati nirereblog ko lang sa other tumblr ko but now i have the same photos i was reblogging! i miss travelling so much it breaks my heart na its so hard to travel na regardless if its local, lalo na if international pa

my brothers and friends having the chance to work hard for their dreams too; thirdy got into benilde and is just waiting for classes to start basically and my brother just needs to book a flight to florida, find a place to live in, and wait for classes to start nalang as well. tapos narealize ko din kahapon na all 6 of us sa barkada namin, kahit hindi na kami close doon sa isang friend namin, are working as designers already; walang halong inggit anymore (especially from me) just pure support for everything we're doing

so yeah, i should probably start working na din after fixing my planner

i hope you guys are doing okay and are safe since maulan parin and everything; please always double mask if you can and drink lots of water!

if youve made it to this part of my post, thank you for reading everything! im excited for august to arrive; tell me what youre excited for! message me and we can be excited together!

[howaminotinthestrokesyet]

Radio Friendly Unit Shifter: The Complete Nirvana Videography

Heart-Shaped Box

Nirvana had originally wanted Kevin Kerslake to direct this video, who had written the initial treatment in July 1992. By the summer of 1993, he had written at least five treatments, which included a shot of Kurt Cobain kissing William Burroughs and another of the entire band hanging by their necks from trees. Yet by the end of August, the band decided to go with Dutch photographer Anton Corbijn. The director seemed initially apprehensive about agreeing to do the video as he had heard Kurt Cobain could act overly detailed in production. He would say, “But then I looked at it and I thought that actually it was pretty good. I was very amazed by somebody writing a song and having those ideas as precise as he did." The video begins with the band standing in a hospital room around an old man receiving an IV drip, then moves to a surreal Wizard of Oz type of outdoor setting. The same old man in a Santa and later Pope hat climbs on a crow infested cross as they sing the song. The video also includes a young girl reaching for fetuses in a tree, while at the same time an overweight woman appears with human organs painted on her chest with a pair of wings. Many of these ideas were actually conceived by Corbijn, not the band as he always came up with the ideas on his own for any of his videos. Upon the promotion’s release, Kevin Kerslake sued the band for copyright infringement, as the case would be settled out of court. Upon its release, the clip became the most played video on MTV eventually garnering two video music awards for Best Alternative Video and Art Direction. Dave Grohl, Krist Novoselic, and Pat Smear accepted the awards as Kurt Cobain had already passed. New Musical Express named it as the 11th best music video of all time, while Time magazine called it the number 10 music video ever saying it was both “beautiful and terrible.” In 2016, Dave Grohl reunited with the young girl from the video, who had this to say about the reunion. “Today reminded me that I peaked at 6 years old but I was the most badass kid on the playground. Today was the absolute coolest. Or in Dave's words seeing each other today was a 'historic moment'! What a legend!”

Sliver

A music video for the song was released in 1993 to promote the compilation album, Incesticide. The video would be directed by longtime collaborator Kevin Kerslake. The clip begins with Kurt Cobain holding his young daughter up behind some cardboard as she dances along to the first few seconds of the track. The video moves to Cobain’s garage, where it shows the band performing the song. Dave Grohl is playing on the drums, even though he never played on the original song. Cobain only sings into a microphone, but he's never seen playing guitar. He is wearing a red mohair sweater that Courtney Love had purchased for him from a fan at a Nirvana show in Belfast, Northern Ireland. His whole garage is filled with toys and decorations the singer had placed in storage just before the release of Nevermind that he had collected over the years. The collection included a Chim Chim toy monkey that was given to him from the Japanese band Shonen Knife.

Come As You Are

This video would actually be the first one directed by Kevin Kerslake, who was hired after such a negative experience with the director on Smells Like Teen Spirit. The concept would be developed by Kerslake as Cobain could not come up with any ideas, so he let the director develop the video. The singer’s only requirement was that some kind of reference be made to the cover of the Nevermind album. The clip shows the band in a dark room as water falls around them obscuring their form. Other images include Cobain swinging from a chandelier, a dog wandering around the room, a baby swimming in a pool, and a pistol falling underwater. The end of the video shows the entire group lying on the ground as Cobain kisses the camera.

Lithium

This video originally had a concept of doing a short animated story about a female girl named Prego. This girl lives in a forest, when she finds some eggs and takes them to a king in a nearby castle. Unfortunately, both Kevin Kerslake and Cobain discovered that it would take four months to produce the video, so they abandoned the idea. Kerslake instead created a collage of concert footage for the video made up of their 1991 Paramount Theater concert and other footage from the 1992 film, The Year Punk Broke. Biographer Michael Azerrad would make this critical comment about the clip. "Although [the video] was enlivened by Kerslake's neat trick of using more violent footage during the quiet parts of the song and vice versa, it was something of a disappointment from a band and a song that promised so much."

You Know You’re Right

Chris Hafner directed this video released in October 2002 to coincide with the single of the same name. The clip shows a montage of The band in either concerts or interviews, but giving the impression that they are actually performing the song. The video would reach number two on Billboard’s music videos chart. New Musical Express would go on to nominate it for Best Music Video in 2002.

In Bloom

Two versions of this video exist. The first one showed clips of the band walking around New York City and performing at Maxwells in New Jersey. In the clip, one can see Krist Novoselic in some shots has hair and others a shaved head. The reason for that comes from the fact that he had to shave it as punishment for a mediocre performance during a show at the Pyramid Club. They made this alternate version for a compilation dvd on the Sub Pop label, Sub Pop Video Network Volume One. The second version, which most people remember is called the Nevermind version. This promotional clip would be directed once again by Kevin Kerslake and released in November 1992. Kurt Cobain’s original concept for it was to tell the story of a young girl born into a Ku Klux Klan family until she realizes the evil nature of her parents, but the concept seemed much too difficult to work out. He then switched it into a parody of 1960’s television shows like the Ed Sullivan Show. The entire video was shot in original cameras of the period in Kinescope, while the band did the entire song without a script. The actor playing the host was Doug Llewellyn, who had worked as the reporter interviewing people after their case on the People’s Court. Cobain wanted to make a funny parody video to show that there was another side to Nirvana. He felt “so tired for the last year of people taking us so seriously . . . I wanted to fuck off and show them that we have a humorous side to us.” The entire band would wear suits during their performance, while the Nirvana frontman had glasses that eventually made him quite dizzy. He would later say in a Melody Maker interview that they wanted to parody groups like the Dave Clark Five, but not the Beatles. He would never mock the Fab Four due to their influence on his songwriting. In the clip, Novoselic is wearing short hair, which he liked so much that he never changed it. They eventually destroy all of their instruments and the stage by the end of the song. In Bloom would go on to win the 1993 MTV Music Video Award for Best Alternative Video.

Smells Like Teen Spirit

This video would be directed by first timer Sam Bayer. The director believed that he actually got hired because the work on his résumé seemed so below average that Nirvana thought that it would represent the opposite of anything remotely corporate. The concept developed by the band was to stage a school concert that ended in a riot. The idea had been based on the films Rock ‘n’ Roll High School starring the Ramones and The 1979 film, Over the Edge. The clip begins with the band playing the song during a pep rally in a high school gym as cheerleaders wearing sweaters with the anarchy symbol on them cheer along. Every so often, the camera cuts to a janitor dancing alongside his broom. The video ends with the apathetic students going from the bleachers to the gym floor in a full-scale riot. The apathy from the students was actually real as they had been sitting on the bleachers all day. Cobain was finally able to convince Bayer that the students should be allowed to mosh at the end of the video. The singer said, “Once the kids came out dancing they just said 'fuck you', because they were so tired of his shit throughout the day.” The Nirvana frontman hated the directors final edit of the video so much that he went in himself creating what became the final version. Upon its release, Rolling Stone’s David Fricke would say that it was “the greatest gig that you could ever imagine.” The video would go on the win MTV Video Music Awards for Best New Artist and Best Alternative Video. In 1999, the video was named the number three music video of all time on a list put out by MTV. VH1 named it number 18 in the greatest television moments in the history of music as alternative music now became a “commercial and cultural force.” At the end of 2019, the video had been viewed 1 billion times on YouTube.

[macklives]

hey so this is gonna be a long-ish one. ive decided its been far too long since i did a session, and we did so many i can often forget what happened. i started in july and im pretty sure its been more than half a year now since this whole blog happened. and in that time, we’ve gone through 88 sessions and i want to know if i remember the relevant plot points and what we got up to in the last few sessions. a refresh/reminder if you would.

so i hereby commence my own little recap of act 5 because yeah no, its too much to do a recap of everything and i have andrew for that after every few acts. but i wanna refresh my mind on act 5 for now. so here we go.

1. alternia.. fucked up place. but its a place the trolls live on so what are we gonna do about it? overthrow the government? seems about right, lets do that with the next troll that gets introduced and if its not kanaya idk what andrew is doing by not having introduced the best troll yet. why the long wait? it was the second introduced? i honestly expected it to go in order when i first read act 5, because first we had karkat talk to jade which was the first new piece dialogue in the comic besides the main kids, but then we had kanaya with rose, which was followed by tavros, then terezi (iirc). so id assume we were following that order but nope karkat got fully introduced, then this random fucking juggalo called gamzee made its way into the comic. imagine my surprise.

2. theres been terminology throughout act 5, that i do not fucking know and will not remember and probably never will. like tf is a perigee again? i made a doc somewhere ill probably find it.

3. karkat’s introduction... short but very sweet. and by sweet i mean we got to know the depths of the angry edge lord. and by depths i mean karkat got angry at gamzee for typing in a way that he didnt like so he yapped like a chihuahua. nah, but seriously, i do like karkat tho, hes growing on me but only bc hes a bitch baby and his whole personality makes me want to mock him so thats the reason im not that annoyed and think hes funny, and the most harmless troll. even more so than tavros. and thats saying something. 7.5/10 bc im generous.

4. then gamzee... the high juggalo troll who has the worst typing quirk imo, i cannot for the life of me read it. but hes chill, i actually really like gamzee. hes funny and the least problematic as of right now. 8.5/10.

5. terezi’s introduction next i think. she likes playing as a lawyer with her stuffed dragons, ie by roleplay, shes blind, can see through licking, and she likes eating chalk, maybe its even nutritious. shes good. 9/10. 

6. uhh in the process of these intros, there are teams being made? karkat joins gamzee and terezi in, i THINK, the red team?? bc terezi likes red?? could be wrong, i dont remember the teams except that its red/blue to represent sollux’s duality in those colors. terezi then tries recruiting AC but AC is like lol sorry i have to ask this friend of mine who has authority over me for some goddamn reason and terezi goes yuck tf i hate that guy................... yeah thats all we have on the teams. pretty sure sollux had smth to do with karkat about the making of the leaders, and they did the “i hate me” and the “no i hate me more than u hate u” or whatever the fuck that was. they got embarrassed afterwards and deleted their messages. im pretty sure they have no messages because everything ends up being mutually deleted so their logs are actually empty. ngl, kinda enjoyed their convos, made me appreciate their characters. i hope we get more because its good content. i also dont know what order this whole thing is in, who contacted who first? couldnt tell you. ill remember later on. and since im basing this off from memory alone, gotta deal with what i remember. uhhhh so yeah. we havent met all characters yet so the teams have not been officially decided but we got the bases, which is that.

7. god i found it, and the only thing im looking at right now is the terminology list i made and what the fuck?? what the fuck?? you miss a few weeks and suddenly the word nubslurping comes up and you forget what the fuck youre reading.

8. im PRETTY SURE aradia is seen after that whole team fiasco?? or its sollux... maybe. wait. its sollux, right. i just knew someone gets introduced mid way through is all. actually, someone gets introduced after every 20 pages. i have no idea. but ik aradia and sollux go hand in hand.

9. oh shit. OH SHIT! RIGHT! I REMEMBER! so this occurs in the latest session i did, and not the beginning of act 5, but AG and aradia team up, right?? and sollux fucking gets manipulated by them and ??? idk??? they make him find the game, reprogram it and then make him believe its going to end the world (which in hindsight is true, but anyways) so he refuses to play it which was AG’s plan all along so she steps up and becomes leader in his place. but aradia says sollux will still play the game no matter what, but she never went through with the plan for AG but it was apart of a prophecy? that sollux wouldnt be the leader at all? that he’d still play? but it had to go according to plan so it could succeed??? we just dont know why yet. anyways, point being, she still cares for sollux since she did it for him rather than for AG. and thats what i recall. god tf i forgot about that whole drama until writing down “sollux and aradia go hand in hand” which gave me violent flashbacks to the memory.

10. oh and id give aradia 9/10 and sollux 7/10. i do like sollux but if i put him higher than karkat, id get crucified. so im keeping them around the same.

11. man i really like sollux and aradia tho, i may have put him at 7, but i really like their dynamic and i really hope they make up and aradia explains herself about AG. because from one side it looks shitty. and while sollux is rude and never makes up his mind, he apologized to aradia after going off, and that was the only time ive seen him be sincere, so im pretty sure he cares for her to some extent. and i think its somewhat mutual? considering the whole “did it for him” thing. man, i see potential because i actually like both their characters. theyre well written. may not have the best personalities, but i appreciate well written characters and homestuck has the best ones ive seen in a while.

12. oh shit, hell yeah, the more i write, the more im connecting the dots and remembering. however, the more i write, the more i want to just make an analogy post but thats not for now. jesus christ its not all about analogies, mack, this is a recap. but.. how does andrew do it? to not go off track??? hard. telling ya.

13. anyways, didnt we break the fourth wall at some point and have the demon gods or whatever the fuck speak to us in third person for the first time in the comic, after having only gone into second person narrative, right after we were introduced to sollux and his “virus”? the uh, the phrase “the demon was already here” was said, or something along those lines. first line in homestuck to give me the creeps ngl and i appreciate it bc it gives me motivation to know what the fuck its about. its cool bc you have no idea where its going and it sure doesnt have anything to do with the current plot, since the trolls’ session/game doesnt have fucking demons so im curious as to what the fuck that was about. and if i really have to make a theory, i feel it has something to do with aradia’s voices in her head which also connect to the gods rose heard when she started disregarding rules and told dave to look at derse without listening to music bc it was as if he was purposely blocking away their calls. like holy shit, that gave me the shivers. while i do want to know more about wtf happens after act 4, trolls are taking priority right now. just like we did with the intermission. no discussing the kids unless necessary. treat this as its own separate comic. and THEN we can connect.

14. ANYWAYS, tavros’ intro???? that comes afterwards?? with the fiduspawn that made me gag a little on the inside? yep. remember that. fuck that lol. -1/10 but tavros himself is MAYBE a 6/10? i wish we explored his character more in his intro bc right now he just looks like a character made only to be a victim rather than have any depth and i feel thats robbing someone of their full potential. give me more personality andrew, rather than a quivering boy who falls prey to bitches. im expecting more throughout the comic honestly and i hope he gets growth so hes not looked as a “victim” but rather his own character. he is still sweet, and i like him because i want to protect him, but id rather have more info, you know what i mean?

15. oh hell. kanaya had a chainsaw at some point. that made me happy. and didnt she cut off tavros’ legs?? and he got robot ones? and some creepy dude was looking and we called him saggy tits bc hes sagittarius? right? neat. that did happen. pretty sure saggy tits is ACs friend that tells her what to do. the more u know. OH and they all have colored blood similar to their text colors lol. that i remember... so tavros has brown, terezi has blueish green, um. karkat has grey the loser. and apparently it forms a rainbow which is nice. rainbow is good.

16. i dont remember anything else actually

17. wait no i do. AG appeared. shes a petty bully. idk what to say about her. we didnt get that much, except that she hates tavros but is okay with aradia. she also looks like a bottle opener. actually, i think she teamed with aradia to gain leadership rather than to “be friends”. and while that is similar to how karkat did it, meaning the gain, the motivation and how they earned it is entirely different. kinda seeing a trend tho. the leaders of the red/blue teams are both characters who wanted the role, but never had it to begin with. only to win their way into the position. but rather than ask non-stop like karkat did, AG manipulated others so she could be successful. not too sure if she also used aradia for that, or is actually motivated to become friends since they were “past enemies” and she needed a rebound. pretty sure its somewhat both. while AG did mostly use aradia to speak with sollux, what she doesnt know is that aradia is a bad bitch who never even thought about AG and only followed through with the plan bc she had a plan of her own. i guess we’ll look into that later. i lowkey want to know their history.

18. OH AC!!! she appeared for a second as well. love her. shes amazing. 9.5/10. and you may ask yourself, why am i saying “i love this character” but none of them are 10/10?? weellllll its because, and i cant stress this enough, 10/10 belongs to kanaya, i dont make the rules. im waiting for her introduction, shes my favorite and its obvious. sorry.

19. oh huh seems i forgot about the term “lusus”. which.. is.. their parents but not really, its these fucking weird ass creatures that the trolls fought in a cave or something as a child. i dont fucking know. terezi hatched hers and it died? gamzee’s also died but his goat sea dad was never really there to begin with so while it is sad, its more sad that gamzee never saw him? um.. karkat killed his own by exploding his computer bc sollux said dont run the virus and karkat said u cant tell me what to do and did it anyways. so thats on him. but apparently theyre supposed to die, to become prototyped during the game, right? yeah. i remember now.

20. thats.. about it? idk anything else, nothing is coming back to me apart from the shit above. huh.... im surprised how quickly things do come back to you the moment you rant about the plot tho.... handy trick.

cool. neat. fun. this took me too long. but im glad i remember a little bit.

[favoriteliar-archive]

creator tag meme

rules: answer the questions and then tag 10+ other creators to answer the questions! thank you @iridescentides and @neve-campbells !

i’m not tagging anyone since y’all have probably already done it but if you want to do this, say i tagged you!

first creation and most recent creation of 2020

this stozier color palette was my first one of the year! and this luke patterson gifset was my most recent! its really interesting to see how much ive grown just based on these two gifsets

one of your favorite creations from 2020

reggie/julie gifset :’)

a creation you’re really proud of

mmc stanley uris gifset

a new style you tried this year and a gifset that uses it

multiple gifs on a canvas! since i started doing it, i’ve created some pretty cool gifsets i think! including this jatp + poofing

your favorite coloring

im obsessed with the coloring in this the turning gifset! idk what it is but i popped off with it ngl. also this gifset of stanley barber’s room is really nice too i think

a creation that took you forever

considering i drew each logo by hand and had to basically create the dirty candi one from two references, this jatp + bands took so long

your creation from 2020 that received the most notes

this miles morales gifset i made for cinematv! but if we’re just talking this blog, then its this stanley barber gifset

a creation you think deserved more notes

i’m gonna post a lot of edits tbh so: this asher gifset! lesbian tracer! classic art mobile headers! lukereggie gifset!

a creation with a favorite scene/quote

i dont really gif like.. specific scenes or quotes but i do love this scene of luke dancing lol

a new fandom you joined and a creation you made for it

buzzfeed unsolved! i made this “the moment i fell in love with shane madej” gifset

a creation you made that breaks your heart

stozier + you are my sunshine i may have actually cried while making this because of the bathtub gif

a ‘simple’ creation that you really love

this aesthetic ianowt gifset! it was my first time trying to edit like that and it was very fun and turned out good :)

a creation that was inspired by another one

this ladynoir gifset was inspired by one of my all time fave gifsets

a favorite creation created by someone else

this itsv gifset is what i wish i could do! same with this absolutely stunning jatp gifset!

some of your favorite content creators from the year

god there are too many to count. off the top of my head, @thewonderwoman @prettybitching @lukehan @iridescentides @bisexualsdean @dianaxprince @kieumyvus @steventrevor @lyrasbelacqua @ranbooscatgirl @nora-reid @miriammaisel @naaleys @sunsetlukes

a for good measure, another a couple more creations of yours that you love

wonder woman gifset! jatp + soulmates! mmc sophia lillis! pink lemonade richie tozier! reggie + color palette! jatp + family! jatp + names!

[princessmadafu]

Summary of Warby’s Judgment, 5th August 2020

For those of you who don’t have time to read all 65 paragraphs in full:

Introduction

(1) MM's "Five Friends" only spoke to People if they could remain anonymous.

(2) The 5F are not sources for anything published by DM/ANL, just the People article of 18th Feb 2019.

(3) Warby grants MM protection of the 5F, "which at this stage is necessary in the interests of the administration of justice. This is an interim  decision." In other words, witness protection; it will prevent the tabloids hounding the 5F and publishing things that may prejudice the case. He also notes that the case has been going on 10 months, is going slowly, and is still far from trial, and his judgment may change with circumstances, "if and when there is a trial at which one or more of the sources gives evidence." (I like the "if and when" here!)

(4) Warby tells MM's team to get a move on. He wants witness statements and a Costs and Case Management Conference so further pre-trial steps can be taken.

The Procedural Background

(5) MM is suing ANL over The Letter on the grounds of "misuse of private information, breach of duty under the GDPR [General Data Protection Regulation], and copyright infringement." Further details as per his judgment on 1st May 2020, the Strike-Out Judgment.

The relevant issues:

(6) In the S-OJ, ANL says the contents of The Letter were not private or confidential, MM had no resonable expectation that they would be, and their publication was a defence of the right of freedom of expression of ANL, readers and Thomas Markle.

(7) ANL claims MM's own conduct forfeited or weakened any expectation of privacy, and she had knowingly allowed The Letter and contents to enter the public domain.

(8) Six pages of details submitted by ANL; the publication of the People article was "sought and intended", "caused or permitted" and "acquiesced in" by MM. This is inferred because (i) the article contained detailed personal information that could only have come from MM herself (ii) the silence of Kensington Palace and MM on whether MM had consented to the 5F talking to People (iii) MM has not complained to People about publishing the article.

(9) This is the bit where MM claims she didn't authorise the article, didn't know what the 5F were doing, only later discovered it, didn't know they'd talk about The Letter or its contents, only 1F made a passing reference to The Letter and that the summary of the contents of The Letter was wrong anyway.

(10) Since the S-OJ, MM's case has been amended, and more information has been provided by her team. More relevantly, ANL has requested further information:

(11) ANL requested that MM identify the 1F who made the passing reference to the Letter and the other 4F who spoke to People.

The Response and attendant publicity:

(12) "The Response": MM's lawyers responded in a Confidential Schedule, and the 1F is now Friend A, and the others are Friends B to E. The 5F "deliberately chose to speak anonymously."

(13) The bit where she claims her wedding generated £1billion, which far outweighed the public funds spent on security.

(14) At one minute to midnight on 30th June 2020 MM's lawyers emailed a letter and attached documents to ANL's lawyers, received at midnight, claiming the docs had been filed at court. They had not. These docs were The Response, an Appendix of press articles, and the Confidential Schedule.

(15) ANL's solicitors immediately forwarded the email to ANL.

(16) At 4.58pm UK time 1st July 2020, the Mail Online published an article headed "Meghan Markle names the five friends behind People article". Brief description of the article, and we first hear of the "long-time friend, former co-star, a friend from LA, a one-time colleague and a close confidante."

(17) At 5.09pm 1st July, Mail Online publishes another article about the £1billion tourism windfall, according to "documents released as part of her High Court battle against the Mail on Sunday".

(18) Around 11pm 1st July, there followed another article about how MM was left "unprotected" by the monarchy, according to "leaked court documents". It also referred to docs seen by the Press Association news agency about the identification of the 5F.

(19) On 2nd July 2020, the paper-version DM ran with "Meghan: The Palace Hung Me Out To Dry" on the front page, plus pp 2-3; MM says she did discuss The Letter with close friends but never authorised them to talk, and more on the £1billion.

(20) All these articles were clearly based on The Response, but not on copies obtained from the court. A non-party can obtain copies, but only after the docs have been submitted, processed and accepted for filing. Which these weren't. They weren't accepted for filing until 11am on 2nd July 2020.

(21) The docs were submitted for filing as confidential and not for third parties without permission of the court, as they contained private information. They were accepted for filing on this basis. Only The Response is available to third parties, but it wasn't available until 11am on 2nd July, after the articles had already been published.

(22) Widespread international coverage before 11am on 2nd July. ANL's suggested third party seems improbable, whereas MM suggests all third party reporting comes from ANL. Warby did a little digging himself, eg Newsweek, and concludes that all third party reporting came from ANL.

(23) MM says ANL "had been astute to publicise its own case" even before this; cites article from 16th Jan 2020 about MM's private texts with the now ex-BFF JM.

(24) On 6th July 2020, ANL lawyers assert that using a Confidential Schedule as part of The Response is illegitimate, and the Schedule should be fully reportable. If no application for an injunction was made by 9th July, they would presume that MM accepted that the Schedule was not confidential.

The Application and attendant publicity:

(25) On 9th July, MM's lawyers made the application now being ruled on about the confidential nature of the Schedule and the privacy of the 5F: no publishing, communicating or disclosing anything in the Schedule or anything that might identify the 5F; no third party applications without permission of the court; and MM must be allowed in proceedings to refer to the 5F as ABCDE, not by their names.

(26) The application comes with two witness statements, one from MM's solicitor containing evidence about Friend C, the other from MM herself containing the bit about each of these women being a private citizen, young mother, etc blah blah clickbait, emotional and mental well-being...

(27) ANL lawyers suggest MM briefed the press about this application before they had received their own copy. Application filed at 8.32am, served on ANL at 8.30am; 8.45am Sky News already asking ANL for a comment; 9.30am title page of MM's witness statement "posted on the Twitter feed of someone called Omid Scobie" who quoted a "close source"... (I love the "someone called Omid Scobie"!) and the quote about the five innocent women, young mother blah blah... (I can imagine the pages of word salad poor Warby had to go through to condense all this politely; the blah blahs are purely my own.)

(28) Evidence supports ANL that MM's team "have been energetically briefing the media about these proceedings from the outset." Warby quotes emails to media representatives from James Holt, Sussex Royal's Head of Engagement and Communication, including a confidential summary note and a "crib sheet".

Relevant Procedural Law

(29) This is mostly technical stuff that Legal Anons will explain much better, but very basically, it starts with a list of who is allowed to see what, who needs the court's permission to see it, and who can be prevented from seeing it.

(30) "The records of the court": The Court has broad powers beyond those noted under (29) supra, and can provide access to the records of the court under the common law principle of open justice. (This is Warby telling MM that he's in charge, not her!)

(31) Parties may request further information, the Court may order information to be handed over; provision is made whereby information may not be used for any other purpose than court proceedings.

The evidence

(32) On 23rd July 2020, a third witness statement was submitted by MM's lawyers, this from Friend B. Three statements from ANL lawyers were followed on 27th July by a further statement from Friend B in reply.

(33) MM's evidence:

(1) B says she and the other 4F spoke on condition of anonymity, and it was B who organised the interviews after speaking with Jess Cagle (editor of People). She gave two reasons for anonymity (i) to avoid media intrusion into their privacy and (ii) to avoid the appearance of seeking publicity for themselves. MM played no part in this, wasn't aware of it and didn't know until after publication. B and the other 4F want to remain anonymous and refer to how media intrusion will impact on their kids.

(2) MM's lawyers say evidence and hearsay evidence from Friend C (as per (26) supra)

(3) MM's statement is short on facts and gives no good reason why her 5F's anonymity should be preserved.

(4) MM's lawyers give four reasons for anonymity: (i) to protect MM's privacy (ii) to protect the 5F's reasonable expectation of confidentiality (iii) none of 5F have been identified or confirmed as talking to People (iv) none of 5F is a party to the action and none is a witness. They are concerned 5F will be intimidated by the publicity and will not agree to be witnesses in support of MM at trial.

(5) MM's lawyers say ANL is exploiting its position as a major media presence, running MM articles to whip up interest in the case, boost revenue and gain litigation advantage.

(34) ANL's evidence:

(1) MM did not impose restrictions on what could be done with The Response, there was no commercial advantage, publishers are allowed to publish stories about any litigation they're involved in, there is no litigation advantage, and no need for ANL to whip up interest in the case as MM is doing it already, all by herself.

(2) MM's concerns and criticisms have no evidential support, there is "scant evidence" for her privacy concerns for the 5F, the 5F were always going to be drawn into the court case, and there's no justification for giving evidence anonymously.

(3) Press cuttings show that Friend B has previously publicised her friendship with MM, the inference being it was to raise her public profile.

(35) Friend B's second witness statement in response to the press cuttings, puts the cuttings in context and denies that it undermines her first statement.

Some matters that are not in dispute

(36) Three matters:

(1) The importance of the common law principle of open justice. Anonymity must only be granted if justified and necessary for the administration of justice.

(2) 5F only gave interviews on the promise of confidentiality from People.

(3) None of 5F has yet been publicly named, and it is not part of ANL's case that knowledge of their identities is already in the public domain.

(37) ANL has not put forward any justification of it being in the public interest to know who 5F are at this stage.

The rival contentions

(38) MM claims the Confidential Schedule is justified to protect 5F anonymity.

(39) Legalese paragraph citing previous cases where breach of confidence has occurred.

(40) More legalese about who should be allowed use of disclosed documents, ANL are trying to maximise publicity and make money from revealing 5F, and the Schedule is part of the statement of case and therefore only available to MM, ANL and their legal teams.

(41) ANL says in this particular case, anonymity is "a derogation from the open justice principle", and the need for anonymity has not been established by "clear and cogent evidence".

(42) Legalese from ANL lawyers about hearings held in private and the  limited circumstances that this is allowed; three paragraphs citing previous cases.

(43) Legalese about when a private individual can expect privacy, even if the private individual at the same time has a public persona.

(44) ANL's lawyers insist that the Schedule is part of the Response, not part of the statement of case, and should therefore be available to anyone, without the need to request permission from the court.

Assessment

CPR 5.4C

(45) (I'm presuming this means rule 5.4C of the Civil Procedure Rules.) Warby questions why 5.4C distinguishes between a "statement of case" and "documents filed with or attached to the statement of case". He says the "procedural archeology has not been carried out", meaning that it's a bit in the rules that no-one knows why it's there.

(46) Not persuaded that the issue of anonymity is decided by the definition of "statement of case", and Warby sides with MM lawyers that the rule was probably there to exclude from automatic inspection any documents that didn't form part of the body of the case.

(47) "The definition seems to me designed simply to make clear for the avoidance of doubt that "statement of case" does not just cover the main pleadings (particulars of Claim, Defence and Reply) but also Further Information about any of those documents." So in other words, MM technically can separate from the main body of the statement of case anything, Appendix, Schedule or other doc, that she doesn't want a third party to see; an application by a third party will have to have a valid reason before the court will give permission to make it available.

(48) "It is true that a party might abuse the process by placing information in a Schedule or Appendix without any justification for doing so. But such abuse is open to scrutiny and could quite easily be controlled and put right by the Court." In other words, Warby is warning MM - if she's abusing the process, he'll put his foot down and squash her hard. Cites a previous case where the judge decided to "revisit the appropriateness of maintaining confidentiality."

(49) The Schedule, by virtue of it being a "document filed with or attached to the statement of case" was already inaccessible to a third party without permission, and there was no need to make it a Confidential Schedule. It remains closed to public inspection without permission.

(50) This case has two other Confidential Schedules attached, to which no objection has been made so far.

(51) Is the factual and legal status of the Schedule justified? Warby thinks so, and approaches it "through the prism of confidentiality":

(1) ANL does not dispute that the information is confidential in nature, just that MM cannot rely on privacy rights, given her public behaviour. ANL is aware of the need to preserve the confidentiality of sources.

(2) ANL has information that requires an obligation of confidence, "subject only to any public interest that overrides that obligation."

(3) The information is not in the public domain, therefore the obligation remains.

(4) "It is clear enough that ANL is threatening to disclose the information, unless restrained. It invited this application, making it plain that it would consider itself free to publish the names if no application was made." (This strikes me as ANL covering its own back, forcing the principle of confidentiality so that they can't be accused of witness intimidation of 5F. ANL's lawyers have thought this through very carefully.)

(52) This is a procedural application for the protection of witnesses, not an injunction. Cites other similar legal cases.

(53) ANL criticises the lack of evidence that 5F need anonymity. Warby disagrees, as B and C have both made statements; B that she coordinated interviews subject to confidentiality, and C that she would suffer if the evidence and hearsay were to be made public. Warby states that the evidence supplied by and about MM and 5F is "credible and persuasive".

(54) How to reconcile anonymity with open justice.

(55) Open justice has two strands: (i) Human Rights Act`confers the right to a "fair and public hearing". This is concerned with trials at which final decisions are made, not interim or pre-trial processes. ANL has not invoked this. Rather ANL lawyers have chosen (ii) the established common law principle of open justice, which goes beyond the Human Rights Act, in that it does apply to interim processes. Cites other previous cases.

(56) "Open justice tends to foster public confidence in the impartial and fair administration of justice, to deter inappropriate behaviour by the Court, to ensure that evidence becomes available, and to limit the risk of ininformed and inaccurate comment about the proceedings." Not all these factors apply here. Cites similar cases.

(57) Open justice exists to "allow the public to scutinise the workings of the Law." However the Court needs to scrutinise applications for the disclosure of information and weed out anything that does not advance public understanding of the legal process.

(58) Warby slates both parties. In full:

"It is in this context that the parties’ tit-for-tat criticisms of one another for publicising details of this case in and through the media are of some relevance. Each side has overstated its case about the conduct of the other. The defendant has not made good, for present purposes, Mr Mathieson’s contention that the “real motivation” of the claimant and her husband is “to afford them an opportunity to wage their own campaign against the press rather than to obtain the remedies at which the proceedings are ostensibly directed”. Nor does the evidence persuade me that the similarly hyperbolic assertions in the claimant’s witness statement are soundly based. It is however tolerably clear that neither side has, so far, been willing to confine the presentation of its case to the courtroom. Both sides have demonstrated an eagerness to play out the merits of their dispute in public, outside the courtroom, and primarily in media reports."

(59) Ditto:

"This approach to litigation has little to do with enabling public scrutiny of the legal process, or enhancing the due administration of justice. Indeed, in some respects it tends to impede both fairness and transparency. This will be a judge-alone trial, not a trial by jury. But to fight proceedings in court and through litigation PR or sensational reporting at one and the same time is not designed to enhance understanding of the legal process. For a party to file and immediately publicise prejudicial and partisan characterisations of the other’s litigation conduct in the media before a hearing certainly does not assist. Equally, the defendant’s coverage of this litigation has provided readers with a good deal of information about the claimant, her views and her attitudes towards the Royal family, which is no doubt interesting to the public, but it has done relatively little to provide insight into the “workings of the law”.  The coverage has selectively highlighted aspects of the defendant’s case and features of the claimant’s case that are novel and interesting to the public. The focus is on sensational reporting of information that happens to be contained in the claimant’s statements of case. There are references to to the proceedings, but some of these involve speculation about what disclosure might be given, and who might or might not be a witness."

(60) ANL haven't explained convincingly why it is necessary to name 5F. In Warby's judgment "at this stage", public disclosure would have little value as there is no guarantee that any of 5F will be winesses.

(61) Confidentiality can enhance freedom of expression or protect a whistle-blower from attack. In this case 5F sought to defend MM from hostile media coverage, and their anonymity not only protected them from adverse consequences but also increased the information available to the public about MM. (LOL, try disinformation! It was mostly lies and we all knew it!)

(62) "At this stage", continued anonymity is fine by Warby, as it upholds the agreement made with People and shields 5F from the "glare of publicity". However, "at trial, that is a price that may have to be paid in the interests of transparency." Disclosure could "undermine fairness and due process". Press articles can be misleading and inaccurate, citing a press article about JM and whether a "named individual" will still back MM in court after their recent falling out; this is the sort of pressure 5F would be under were their identities revealed.

(63) For these reasons Warby grants the application.

(64) Other things Warby is not prepared to address at this time.

The form of order

(65) These orders will remain in place until trial or further order. They will be kept under review, and re-considered at the Pre-Trial Review. Changes will be made as required in the light of changing circumstances.

[blackgirlblues]

Being A Black Girl: And Chasing Your Dreams.. Yikes.

Hi, 

It’s me, your resident black girl back with some new shit to rant about. I’ve been posting a few screenshots of short poems and paragraphs I’ve been writing on my phone as a way to heal and get over Capricorn boy from my last post on here and I see you guys like and reblog. Thank you for showing love, although it makes me sad that so many of you seem to be going through the same range of emotions I am. I’m sorry. 

I know it’s a lonely place to be in. 

But, on the bright side, I’ve got a lot of new followers joining the diary/manual/rant page that is blackgirlology and it’s nice cause I think it’s becoming a little bit of a community. So, in a way, were never really going through any of these emotions alone. If you’ve found this page-you’re part of a community. Bask in it. 

Anyways, that aside, a lot has happened since I last spoke to you. I don’t know if any of you may remember, and for some new people this will be a surprise. But I’m actually a singer songwriter from Ireland. Moved to London a year and a half ago to pursue my music dream and that’s how I met Capricorn boy whos been the source of all my poems. 

Throughout this time in between, I’ve been trying to chase my dreams, and chase them relentlessly. and this summer i did just that, let me tell you, what im about to tell you guys, is to put it simply, wild. I’ll just cut to the chase. 

It all started in July. I’d been in London for quite a long time now, over a year and now have a manager who’s my best friend first and foremost. We’ll call her Maya. I met her in my first week of moving to London in the student halls I was staying at and we became best friends pretty quick. She studies music business, so it made sense and she just naturally ended up taking up the role as my music manager. Shes seen everything. The songs I wrote about Capricorn boy, the tears, everything. And she saw everything this summer. 

I saw an ad for a record label opportunity in London. It was advertised on my university facebook page; a new indie label, looking for demo submissions for a competition they were setting up to find their new signee. I sent a screenshot to Maya who agreed I should send my stuff in. I did, they liked it, I got a meeting, we were sent terms and conditions for the competition. We signed it, the rest was supposed to be history. 

Big yikes. 

There’s so many layers to this story that I will be shortening it, just because it can get very draining for me to talk about or even write about. I’ve healed from it i think, but I still want to put it here and write it about to finally close that chapter and be done with my feelings about what happened to me and my music. 

Basically, the whole competition, the record label, the dickhead CEO, it was all a scam. I had accidentally signed away the master rights to my new song to a record label started by a fake CEO who was committing fraud and known for tricking young artists into handing over their master rights so he could profit off of them, for power. 

It was a mess. Another contestant told me and Maya when we were outside of their office. Just minutes before we were under the impression that I was doing an interview for Billboard Magazine. Honestly, I never truly believed it. Shit was too good to be true. 

But she told us everything. How he was actually a run away from Spain, where he was caught and exposed for doing the exact same thing to artists there, how he didn’t have any money to fund the competition he had somehow roped all of us into, how he was illegally avoiding paying his team, how none of the creatives we had collaborated with for photoshoots etc were paid, how everything was a lie, how he didnt have any connections, and how he was trying to convince me specifically to sign a 360 deal with his label. 

Which, guys, I’m not stupid. After the first week of being with the label for the competition and letting my song live through their disastrous marketing campaign, Maya and I long decided that regardless of what they said, I would not under any circumstances be signing anything with any entity of their company. 

After being told the truth, I had to sit down. You see, when I came across this opportunity, I thought this was finally the life I’d been manifesting coming true. I had begun to grow in my spirituality and start journaling, writing down my manifestations, and getting to work with a record label who would later offer me a fair contract before I turn 20 was one of the manifestations I had written down every night before I went to bed. However, what I’d gotten was the exact opposite. 

I remember, me, Maya, and 2 of the girls from the competition all stood around in a circle outside of their new office that the CEO also hadnt paid for wondering what our next move would be with this new information. There was still 2 other contestants inside who had no idea what was really going on was an elaborate scam. One of them wanted to go in and expose them on the spot. I said no, we had to go in and pretend like everything was normal until we figured out what to do afterwards. 

So in I went, plastering the fakest smile on my face and pretended like I still thought I was about to be speaking with Billboard Magazine. Once I got out, I broke down in Maya’s arms. 

I went home to my flatmates, Ellie and Bea and cried for hours before I had to go work a 7 hour shift at a pizza place. 

I stayed in bed, and cried, and cried. and cried again. I didn’t get out of bed unless I needed too. The only people I talked too were my flatmates E and B and Maya. 

Everything was sorted out eventually, a lot more happened, but as I’ve been writing this article for you guys, I realised that all of that stuff is no longer relevant to my journey and isnt something I want to bring back into my energetic circle because I’ve made peace with the fact that a lot of people who betrayed me when I was at my lowest, peace with the fact that these contestants who wanted to “work together” to get out of this mess, actually wanted to save their own asses and leave me in the cold. 

But I still got out of it and I’m still here. 

I nearly got sued by a man with less than 20 pound to his company account online, but hey, I’m here.

I guess why I’m telling you guys this really short account of my summer is to both record it for myself but also to say its okay to flop, its okay to fail. I did both this summer. and thank god i did. it was the best thing that ever happened to me. 

following your dreams is scary, doing it as a black girl is terrifying because society has already kind of set you up to fail. there’s already misconceptions about what you do, who you are, where you come from and how good you’re going to be at what you do. its almost like we cant fail and we need to work 10 times harder to obtain half of what the average white person will get. and sometimes it can feel like we dont have any space to fail or make mistakes because of this but let me tell you thats not true. 

if anything, the universe will put you in places that will force you to grow through the mistakes you make. and thats exactly what happened to me this summer. 

i chased my dream so relentlessly i ended up in an environment i thought i manifested, i thought was good for me, only for the universe to show me that that specific environment i’d been wishing to be in is the furthest from what i need right now in my life. 

this so called failure showed me that not everybody who smiles can be trusted, and that people can be way more deceiving than i ever thought, especially when push comes to shove and they need to save themselves. you start to see the real them when it starts to get tense. the people who seem to be around you when you’re doing good will most likely dissapear when things start to go south, including some of your oldest friends. you will get radio silence on their end. be upset. cry. but after that be glad that this situation revealed their true colours. 

and then never put any more energy into them again. 

this failure showed me how fucking strong i am. how resilient and kind i am even in the face of disrespect and actual evil. it showed me how much i can care for someone who i believe is at a risk of losing it all, and showed me that this will not always be reciprocated. and for a while i thought that meant that i had to harden myself up and grow a shell. but i dont think so. i will not allow the things ive been through to make me into a hard person when i was born soft. i mean now, im a little rough around the edges, jagged enough to cut anyone who comes too close with some of that bad energy, but soft enough to hold myself tight and glue myself back together when i need to. soft enough to hold the people who held me this summer. soft enough to help people who i know deserve it. 

im a good person in a shitty world, i don’t need to match the world and become a shitty person to survive. 

after all of this happened, i stopped writing music. 

i haven’t written anything properly or produced anything in months and sometimes i get worried that ive completely lost my talent. but thats another thing that this failure taught me, i can never truly lose whats meant to be mine. i know that i was put on this earth to create change, to inspire, to be an activist and a voice for people who dont have one. i know i was put here to do it through a creative medium and right now i still think that is music. 

i think i just need to stop being so scared to start again, to learn my craft again.

i used to be so scared of failure but now i am so thankful for it and the lessons its taught me. i had so much hurt and pain and hatred in my heart for the universe for, in my head, doing this to me. but then i realised that the universe never does anything to you, it does it for you. all of this happened in my best interest and while i definitely didnt understand at the time, i get it now.

thank you universe for the worst summer of my life. 

and my black ass will be continuing to chase my dreams relentlessly, failing, tripping and falling on my ass until i get to the very top. 

besides, if everything had just gone right, that wouldnt have been very interesting, would it?

[dailyaudiobible]

06/21/2020 DAB Transcript

2 Kings 1:1-2:25, Acts 13:42-14:7, Psalms 139:1-24, Proverbs 17:19-21

Today is the 21st day of June welcome to the Daily Audio Bible I am Brian it's great to be here with you as we collectively twist the knob and throw open the gateway and step into a brand-new week. It is all out there in front of us. Let’s live into it with all of our hearts as we stay in close step fellowship with Jesus, the power of the Holy Spirit to lead and guide us into all truth. And that will make for…that will make for a good week. So, let's step into this week doing that and doing what we do every day, taking the next step forward as we continue the journey through the Bible. And today…I mean it's a special day because we’re beginning a new book in the Old Testament the book of second Kings. But there’s not really a lot to talk about second Kings that we haven’t already talked about, even all the way back to first Samuel, second Samuel and first Kings. These were all one…one scroll. They were…they were all one book at one time. And, so, things have been broken up into chapters and verses over time for ease of reference, etc. etc. And this has happened over many centuries that have preceded us. So, we will be picking up where we left off. Of course, the book…the books of Kings are telling us the stories of who reigned in the kingdom of Israel, which is the 10 tribes in the North and the kingdom of Judah which is the king…which is the tribe of Judah and Benjamin in the South. So, let's pick up the story. Second Kings, chapters 1 and 2 today. And we’ll read from the New International Version this week.

Prayer:

Father, we thank you for your word. We thank you for this new week that we have walked into and we thank you for what we were greeted with as we come into this new week from the Psalms, that there is nowhere that we can go that you are not, that there is no where we can be to flee from your spirit - up, down, left or right - does not matter which direction we go or how far we go we cannot escape your spirit, which means that your presence is perpetually available to us, which means that you are present to us right this moment if we would simply have eyes to see and open those eyes and become aware. So, come Holy Spirit as we move into this new week. Lead us deeper into Jesus. Lead us on the narrow path that leads to life. Lead us into all truth we ask in Jesus’ name. Amen.

Announcements:

dailyaudiobible.com is home base, and that's where you find out what’s going on around here.

Today in the United States it's Father's Day. And, you know, fathers as with mothers are celebrated at different points of the year in different regions and different countries, but today is Father's Day. And, so, happy Father's Day all of you fathers out there. I’m a father as well. And, so, you know, I think of the great privilege that it has been to be a father to my children and I think of the profound impact that they have had on my life and…and just showing me the heart of God by forcing me…by forcing me to…to not only receive His fathering but to give…to give it back to my children the best flawed, stumbling way that I can. And, so, yeah…as we remember our fathers today let's remember them in prayer. Let's lift them before the Lord. It’s a difficult job to be a parent but it is…it is how the gospel advances forward from generation to generation. And, so, happy Father's Day. All of you men out there, happy Father's Day.

If you want to partner with the Daily Audio Bible you do that at dailyaudiobible.com. That's the website like I mentioned a second ago and I thank you…thank you for your partnership. If you’re using the Daily Audio Bible app you can press the Give button in the upper right-hand corner or the mailing address, if you prefer, is PO Box 1996 Spring Hill Tennessee 37174.

And, as always, if you have a prayer request or encouragement, you can hit the Hotline button in the app, which is the little Hotline button up at the top…top right…top right-ish part of the app or you can dial 877-942-4253.

And that's it for today. I’m Brian I love you and I'll be waiting for you here tomorrow.

Community Prayer and Praise:

My Abba you have called me. I hear you - to listen, to absorb, to feel, to understand, to reach back, to pray. Please give me the discernment, the wisdom, the words, the energy to answer your call. My 21-year relationship with multiple sclerosis will do its best to get in the way but you have called me to pray and to call the DAB, the DABC and to write on Facebook. Thank you I love you so much my Abba. This is Adrian from Maryland and I love my DAB family.

Hello, my name is Javier I am 26 years old and I live in Florida first time caller. I’ve been listening almost a month now and I just wanted to thank everybody for…for…for…for this application. It has changed my life most definitely. I just love listening to…to every word that comes from the Bible and to be a part of a community of love and peace. I…I battle with my…with guilt and…and…and just a lot of sorrow and I know I’m going…well I am going through some warfare and I…I just feel guilt over my pats sin. And I just ask everyone to pray for me to have strength and that I can trust and continue to fight this war in Jesus’ name. I thank you and love everybody so much. This honestly has changed my life so so much.

Hi DAB family this is Julie I’ve been listening since January and I’ve called in a few times. I took care of my mom for six years in my home. She had stage IV colon cancer and then she died in March and I thank everybody for the prayers at that time. God has placed it on my heart to pray for and ask for prayer for kids in the United States, kids in my area and your area who are in foster care or kids who need to be in foster care or kids who are still in a bad situation in their home or a relative’s home. These kids are often so scared and sad and angry and afraid. They don’t know if they’re gonna be able to stay in a foster home, if they’re gonna to a bad situation at home. And there’s so many kids and not enough people to take care of them. Help me in praying for these children for their safety. And pray that there’ll be more people willing to help these kids, foster families or mentors or whatever we can do to help them. Thanks DAB family.

Good morning DAB community my name is Nyia and I’m a black woman in America with a 26-year-old son and a husband and I am gripped with fear. I cannot sleep. I love God, I know I trust Him, and I know He has not given me the spirit of fear. But in these times, I have become so fearful. I do not want my family out there. When my son is a car I cannot think, I cannot breathe. When my husband leaves the house to go to the grocery store, I am paralyzed with fear. This is not healthy for me. I have prayed and prayed, and I cannot get fear away from my heart. And I’m asking for your prayers. I am praying with all of you guys that the Holy Spirit will come and bring peace in America and bring justice for African Americans all around the world. And I’m asking you to just pray for me and my family and I will continue to pray for you as well. May God bless us all during these trying times. I thank you so much.

Good morning this is Sonia in Austin Texas and I am calling for a sister that called back a couple months ago and she was very sad because she’s a single woman, she’s never been married, she has no children and it was coming up on Valentine’s Day and she wasn’t able to celebrate that with a significant other and Mother’s Day would be coming up and she said that there’s just all these reminders at her job and everything else that, you know, she just didn’t fit in these categories and there just was a lot to celebrate. But she did say on June 16th 1989 and today is June 16th 2020 that she gave her life to the Lord and she can celebrate that. And sister I want you to know that I am celebrating with you today the most important decision that you have ever made and will ever make in your lifetime and that is to become a follower of Christ. In we here at your family, the DAB family, we rejoice with you, we love you, you are not alone. God is with you every day. And I just want you to know that I have been thinking about you and praying for you and I will continue to do so. If you want to reach out to me, I have a funny email is called bugtickle@gmail.com. And sister, I’d love to become a partner with you and just know that…that you’ve been on my heart. And congratulations! Today is your day. What a beautiful day. Heaven is rejoicing remembering the decision that you made. Well, my time is up, and I want you to know that we love you and your so in our thoughts. Congratulations again.

Good morning Daily Audio Bible this is Cheryl in southeastern Washington. Got through…got through listening to the Daily Audio Bible with Brian. Thank you, Brian and Jill for this ministry, this podcast that we can come together and listen to the word and…and to hear what God has to say and to also listen to the prayer requests. Right now I want to…I heard a prayer request from Patricia in New Orleans just asking that God take her pain away. And I’m just letting you know Patricia, I’m gonna be praying for you that God will completely heal you and that he would just bless your socks off Patricia and thank you so much for calling in. And just know that Cheryl in southeastern Washington is praying for you. God bless you, God be with you, God heal you. And thank you Daily Audio Bible family. Love you all. Bye.

I can’t believe. These words have been, a cry for help and a battle cry as our world gets swept up in the spirit of baseless hate that’s overtaking us, hate for those who don’t follow COVID rules, hate for those who do follow the rules, hate for mask wearers and non-wearers, for Chinese people where a virus began, for foreign people after we closed our borders and now again for our black people. I can’t breathe. Why? Is this hate infiltrating me and changing the into a hateful person? God forbid it. Our world is changing but God You aren’t changing. We again find ourselves in a desert. We walk towards it originally to escape persecution fear and yet we became fearful and we began to persecute each other. God help us to overcome the fear of being unable to breathe because the desert temperatures have become too hot, to overcome the fear of dying from thirst because we forget that You are our living water, to overcome the fear of dying from hunger because we forget that You’re very word is enough to sustain us, to overcome the fear of abandonment because we can no longer see the one who leads us who is up on that mountain. Help us to overcome the temptation to build up golden idols because we forget Your promises to return to us, because we forget that the mountaintop is not really that far. It is and has always been within reach. It has been within reach through the grace of Your cross and Your Holy Spirit but even if we…if we still feel that if we can’t climb because we can no longer breathe, Lord You have promised to climb down to us again and You have sent us Your breath of life to help us to hold on until You get here. Help us to breathe Lord, help us to hold on. In the name of the Father in the son of the Holy Spirit be blessed family and be a blessing.

[ksjsflower]

16th of July - Jungkook X Reader

part 1

genre: humor, college!au, jungkook! fuckboy au, future smut and angst

words:idk dude

It was at times like this that you wondered whether the whole universe that we live in is just a tiny fraction of something way more powerful. Could it be destiny? If there even was such a thing, you were almost certain it had struck you when you had least expected it to. Thursday, 16th of July, 2016. The day you knew you would remember your whole life and all of your next lives.

The 16th of July 2016, Thursday. You were 19, just graduated from highschool, ready to start college. Oh, were you in for a ride. During your high school years, all you ever thought about was how fun college and moving in with your best friend, Nana, would be. Nana was actually more like a sister to you. You guys met way back when you were 5 at a playground. It was at the moment she stepped on your sand castle and started crying and apologizing you knew you two were gonna become friends.

However, moving in - not so fun actually. Both of you had a mess at home, and of course, your mothers were worried sick about you two 'becoming independent and growing up so fast'. The first day you two arrived at your dorm was chaotic. People were running aroung, bumping into each other like there's no tomorrow, everyone was all up in their business. Until.

'Dude, the guy with curly hair and a leather jacket by the lockers has been staring at you for about 2 minutes now.' Nana whispered to you while you were trying to balance your books for the classes you both got today.

'Uh, what? Where and who and why?' you crinkled your nose when a certainly heavy book pressed your pinky. 'I could use some help over here, stop looking around for boys, its the first day for fuck's sake..' you rolled your eyes.

'Alright, FIRST of all, - she was getting ready for another one of her rants - 'it's kinda hard not to notice when there's quiete a few people over here if you didnt already realize that, that his eyes out of all the people he can look at, only look at you. For t w o minutes. Even three now, cause' I just checked and he is still looking, only now he has a smirk on his face probably because your hair is a mess from holding 20 books and I am talking to you about him not so subtly cause now hes looking at me haha-''

You were so confused as to why she was rambling to you while looking behind you as if something was approaching. Nevertheless, you didnt think much of it. You just thought it was another one of Nana's silly actions, until you felt a hand on your shoulder the same moment Nana abruptly shut her mouth.

You slowly started turning around not expecting the smell that came from behind you to be strong cologne. You hated cologne, so it left you wondering for a second why you actually enjoyed inhaling this particular one.

But when you actually did turn around surprising yourself when you didnt drop any of the books you were holding, you were met with a face of a boy. A rather good looking boy. Man, probably the best looking boy you have seen in the last 10 years. When your pair of eyes met his doe like pair, you were left speechless. Thank God you werent the one who was going to start the talking because as soon as you opened your mouth you were cut off by his own voice.

'Are you guys new here? I saw you going around looking all confused and shit so if you need any help, you can ask me, I dont bite,' - he mused in a rather interesting tone,you couldnt decipher if he was being flirty or if his tone was usually sensual like that. - 'Yeah, I'm sure thats why you were looking,' Nana jumped in very awkwardly and as to prove her point, she added an unpleasant laugh at the end of her statement which made you want to face palm yourself right in front of his face.

'Yes, of course. Now why else would I be looking? I am a well mannered man.' He gave a smile so charming you were sure you would have flown to another dimension right then and there if it werent for all the books you were holding.

He must've noticed your lack of response which is why he took half of the books you were holding to himself. 'There you go.. saw you struggling for a little while. Also, I couldnt help but notice your little friend over her talking about me? Or am I possibly wrong?'

You finally spoke up and mentally congratuated yourself for not stuttering. 'Uh, yeaahh.. you're probably seeing things, we were just trying to find the right classes and stuff..'

'Seeing things? Damn, didnt have to word it like that, makes me feel undesirable,' he gave a breathy laugh while faking being hurt by putting his hands on his chest.

'Oh, I am sure that it does' you answered sarcastically. Cmon, this guy looked like sex on a stick. Feeling undesirable? Certainly not his case.

'See, you get me. I was not mistaken when I thought I felt a connection to you the moment I saw you across the hall,' he gave you a cheeky grin which left you rolling your eyes at the back of your head so hard you were sure they were gonna stay there.

'A connection? Please. And here I was thinking that this was a fuckboy free college.' You sighed dramatically which left Nana bringing her fist to her lips to stiffle her laughs.

He did look a bit taken aback by your response, but nevertheless managed to cover it up with a smirk in a span of 0.02 seconds. 'Arent you a fiery one, huh?' He smiled yet again in his seemingly natural flirty self.

'You havent seen anything yet.'

'Oh, so you're implying that we are going to have more talks in the future?' He smiled at you but his eyes were rather daring.

'You wish. Keep dreaming boy. Theres only one first impression and youve ruined it, so we aint talking any time soon.' - Nana once again let out a wheeze, only this time it was loud and you shut your eyes tightly wanting the ground to open and swallow you.

'Its alright, it doesnt have to be anytime soon, I can wait if its you who Im gonna talk to.' His comment left your cheeks tainted a light shade of pink, but you couldnt let your resolve crumble infront of him. Who did he think he was all confident trying to seduce you without even knowing your name?

'Nah, Im good. You didnt really understand what I meant. We aint talking anytime soon is supposed to mean that we are never talking after this again, kapeesh?' you were stating to get tired but you wanted to continue bickering with the unknown boy for some reason.

'Baby, dont underestimate me. Never is a strong word. - plus.. if we aint gonna talk thats okay we dont have to talk, we can always do other things.' he winked at you after throwing the innuendo right at your face. You scrunched your nose at the pet name but chose to ignore it.

'That was extremely pervy of you saying that to someone you have quiete literally just met. - you paused to flick your hair behind your shoulder. 'you should congratuate yourself, ive never started hating someone as soon as I did with you, you are the first one to accomplish that , you should feel proud, man.'

'I can be a lot of firsts to you, you know. I feel honored to be honest.' he announced proudly for some reason.

'Bold of you to assume you would be my first. Dont underestimate me, baby.' you threw back repeating his exact same words.

Nana was getting ready for the good part when suddenly you cut her fun short. 'Nana, lets go.' you grabbed your books from his hands harshly with one hand and pulled your best friend with the other free hand.

As you two were walking away you ignored Nana's whispers of protest when suddenly a voice was heard from behind you two.

'I'm Jungkook, by the way!' he yelled over a few people passing by.

You stayed quiet and opted for giving him the finger while he was still facing your back. Jungkook did not know why that action pulled the biggest toothy smile on his face, but was certainly glad you didnt get to see it.

'Well... at least he was cute?' Nana added while you two already walked away.

'Yeah. Cute.' you answered emphasizing both words as to let her know you thought he was everything except cute.

Well, college was going to be a lot of fun.

[impressivepress]

Trotsky on the Russian Revolution

THE political struggle has a logic all its own. A man may be an adept at walking the tight-rope. He may strain every nerve in doing so, and be entirely successful in avoiding a fall either to one side of the arena or the other. But in the class struggle man cannot walk the tight rope. The more he tries, the more obvious it becomes that he is on one side and not the other.

Something like this has happened to Trotsky in his History of the Russian Revolution. For all his pretensions that it is “an honest study of the facts, determination of their real connections,” his book is none the less—or all the more—a bulky, three-volume pamphlet against Leninism, and above all against Lenin’s Party. It would indeed be strange were matters otherwise, when a man fought Lenin’s Party, off and on, from 1903 to 1917, and again from 1927 (to take only the date of his formal expulsion) up to the present day.

From the introduction onwards, when we learn (Vol. I, page 16) that social-democratic (i.e., revolutionary) criticism of Tsardom before the revolution was “nothing more than a safety valve for mass dissatisfaction, a condition of the stability of the social structure,” Trotsky’s monstrous idea of what constitutes a revolutionary Party of the working class is only equalled by his contempt for the one he had to deal with in Russia. This makes his book of great value to those reformist leaders, particularly in the I.L.P., who are now moving heaven and earth to restrain the revolutionary rank and file from joining forces with the Communist Party in this country. No wonder these leaders advertise Trotsky’s books and use his language at every convenient opportunity.

Trotsky’s mantle casts the glamour of revolutionary experience (even that of a renegade who declares that it is not socialism which the U.S.S.R. is building) over I.L.P. attacks on the revolutionary Party of the British working class—for the most part in exactly the same language that Trotsky used for many years about Lenin’s Party.

The amazing description of the rôle of a revolutionary Party in prerevolutionary times, just quoted, is no slip of the pen. Trotsky quotes without a tremor the secret police report on the Bolsheviks just before the war. “The most energetic and audacious element, ready for tireless struggle, for resistance and continual organisation.” But he abstains from giving even elementary flesh and blood to this bare skeleton—from drawing even a summary picture of the actual Bolshevik Party, in its cells, district committees and Central Committee, struggling, resisting and organising. Why? For a very good reason.

During these same years Trotsky was bitterly fighting the Bolshevik policy and working frenziedly for the liquidation of their organisation. This bitter fight went on from 1903 to 1913, in which latter year his attitude was well summed up in his own letter to the Menshevik leader, Chkheidze (April, 1913): “What a senseless incitement seems the rotten discord which is systematically excited by the specialist in such work, Lenin, that professional exploiter of everything backward in the Russian Labour movement . . . Lenin has made Pravda the implement of sectarian intrigue and unprincipled corruption . . . Lenin has to play systematically at hide-and-seek with his readers, talking of unity from below and making a split above, representing conceptions of the class struggle in terms of sect and faction. In short, the whole structure of Leninism to-day is built up on lies and distortions, and contains the poisonous seed of its own decay.” And Trotsky called for the wiping out of all “factional” differences, i.e., the uniting of all groups of the Social-Democrats, opportunist and revolutionary, irrespective of their policy. Trotsky himself described his purpose as “the destruction of the very foundations of Leninism, which is not compatible with the organisation of the workers into a political party, but flourishes magnificently on the dung of factional differences.”

Not only did Trotsky declare himself in this sense, but he worked for it too. And it is not accidental that the chronological table at the end of volume I, which comes from the pen of Trotsky’s “distinguished translator” and disciple, Max Eastman, omits (i) the foundation of the Social Democratic Party in 1898; (ii) the all-important Second Congress of the Party in 1903, at which the Bolsheviks split from the Mensheviks (including Trotsky); (iii) the “August Bloc” of all the Menshevik elements which Trotsky organised to fight the Bolsheviks in August, 1912; (iv) the historic revolutionary manifesto against the war published under Lenin’s direction by the Bolsheviks in September, 1914. For the Trotskyists the long years of relentless struggle for the Party, building it up group by group, hammering out its policy step by step, in incessant battle not only against the police but also against opportunism in all its forms (including Trotsky), don’t count—they are merely “a safety valve for mass dissatisfaction,” at best “sectarian” prehistory.

So when the war came, with its natural disorganisation of the revolutionary movement, at first Trotsky sees only “a dreadful desolation in the underground movement,” in which “only scattered groups, circles and solitary individuals did anything” (p. 60). That “only” is a political autobiography in itself. Trotsky does not suspect—or suspecting, he hides—that it was Lenin’s battle for a revolutionary illegal Parry, mercilessly fighting opportunism on all fronts during those previous years of “the dung of factional differences” which alone made it certain that, however much the Tsar’s police arrested, seized, broke up, of the machinery and the leadership, the class conscious workers always built up a new Party organisation around even a single Leninist, and sometimes even without him. That is why the police report which Trotsky himself quotes, without apparently understanding, speaks of the revolutionary activity of the Leninists leading to strikes and disorders, in all the larger centres “since the beginning of the war.” Nothing else could happen, after 10 years of Bolshevik work.

It is essential to understand this. At the present time so-called “Socialists” are glibly talking of the “crushing” of the working class movement in Germany by the bourgeois White Terror, and blaming its “break up” on the German Bolsheviks, while paying lip service to the splendid fighters against Hitler who have made their appearance all over the country. They hide from the workers—just as Trotsky does in his History—that the fighters have been schooled and inspired by the relentless fight of the German Communists in previous years.

So again when Trotsky comes to the revolution of March, 1917. The rôle of the Bolsheviks, so eloquently attested by the secret reports of the police to their superiors, is reduced by him to the very barest minimum, frequently to vanishing point. He speaks of the great political strikes at Petrograd in October, 1916, with a passing reference to “Bolshevik leaflets distributed”—ignoring the manifesto of the Petrograd Bolshevik Committee and its three days’ discussion at many factories which launched the first strike of 60,000 workers and the similar lead which led to the second strike of double the size. He refers to the 575,000 strikers of January and February, 1917, the 150,000 who struck at Petrograd on January 9th (“Bloody Sunday”) the continuous strikes in February, the 90,000 who struck on February 14 on the day the Duma opened—and completely ignores (apart from a passing reference) the intense Party work which lay behind these strikes, backed by the tremendous prestige of the “Leninists” which even the police recognised. It was expressed in the existence of no less than 15 sub-district committees, with live connections in scores of factories, and numerous illegal leaflets which called the strikes referred to (Fleer: “the Petersburg Committee of the Bolsheviks in the War Years”).

No wonder, after the foregoing, that Trotsky describes the actual mass movements which began the revolution, from February 23 onwards, as an initiative “taken of their own accord by the most oppressed and downtrodden part of the proletariat, the women textile workers” (p. 120). Again and again he underlines this point, declaring that two days later, when the Petrograd Bureau of the Bolshevik Central Committee called for an All Russian General Strike, they were “watching the movement from above . . . they did not lead” (p. 129); and “the masses had almost no leadership from above” (p. 135). He even discovers that the Vyborg subdistrict committee was “opposing strikes,” because it was against action on that particular day, February 23.

What are the facts? The facts are that the Bolshevik Party of course did not “launch” the revolution against absolutism. The first strikes at some factories on February 23 may or may not have been started by members of the Bolshevik Party. But neither these nor the other strikes would have played the part they did but for the immense work of the Bolsheviks in the preparatory period—the 480 strikes at Petrograd with 500,000 participators between July, 1915, and December, 1916: of these, over 250, with 350,000 strikers, political, for the most part led by the Bolsheviks: the minimum figure of 87 leaflets and other publications in not less than 300,000 copies, issued illegally in the factories and barracks of Petrograd by the Bolsheviks during the war period: the contacts with dozens of works and factories already mentioned.

In point of fact, however, in its manifesto shortly after February 14, the Petrograd committee for the first time declared that “the time for open struggle has arrived” and called for fraternisation with the soldiers as well as for strikes. And the immediate response came, not from the women textile workers as Trotsky alleges, but from one of the Bolshevik strongholds—the giant Putilov Works, 30,000 strong, where a stay-in strike on February 18 was countered with a threat of a general lockout on February 20. The workers at mass meetings in the shops on February 21 refused to surrender, the state controlled management closed down the works on February 22, and 80,000 workers of Petrograd poured into the streets the next day in support of the Putilov Works. The next day they were 200,000. This movement of the biggest detachment of the Petrograd proletariat, one to whom that proletariat was accustomed to turn for a lead, “escaped the notice” of Trotsky.

Only much further on in the book (pp. 167-8), he admits grudgingly that “the mystic doctrine of spontaneousness explains nothing.” But even so he goes no further than to refer to the revolutionary experiences of the masses, and to “scattered workers . . . capable of making revolutionary inferences” and “progressive soldiers seized, or at least touched, in the past by revolutionary propaganda.” But what workers; where did they come from; from whom did they learn; what inferences; who “touched” the soldiers? At long last, very cautiously, we learn in one sentence (p. 169) that they were “educated for the most part by the Party of Lenin.” That this is an afterthought is shown by its total lack of connection with anything that went before it. The party of Lenin, up to that point, has been scarcely more, in Trotsky’s representation, than a vague shape in the background which gave little leadership. And no wonder. If Trotsky said more, he would have to reveal that Lenin’s party educated them for years in a life-and-death struggle against the Trotsky-Menshevik alliance!

Of course, Trotsky makes great play with the wavering and confusion in the Bolshevik leadership, during the first month after the March Revolution, singling out Stalin in particular. These waverings have never been concealed by the Bolshevik Party. Lenin’s writings on the subject were republished in his collected works, while Stalin recalled his own mistakes as early as 1924, when Trotsky first resumed his attacks on the Party which had been interrupted or restrained since 1917. It is amusing, however, to see Trotsky attacking Stalin for his shortlived advocacy in March, 1917, of a union of Bolsheviks and internationalist Mensheviks (p. 317) on the ground that thereby he was sweeping aside Lenin’s wartime struggle “against social-patriotism and its pacifist disguise.” For all through the war Trotsky had been specifically attacked by Lenin for his refusal to break with these very Mensheviks, i.e., “social-patriots in pacifist disguise.” Lenin called Trotsky’s group “lackeys of opportunism abroad” (1915) and “waverers even more dangerous than the social patriots” (1917). While Trotsky, on these very grounds, was attacking Lenin’s “policy of group selection and sectarian intolerance” (No. 146 of his paper, Nashe Slovo).

And in the present volume itself. Trotsky gives every kind of psychological explanation of Menshevism except that of bourgeois elements in the ranks of the proletariat (pp. 185-7). He represents their pre-revolutionary rôle as that of putting the bourgeoisie “in touch with the more moderate upper layers of the workers, those with a tendency towards legal activity around the Duma and in the trade unions” (p. 237), a typically vulgarised apportioning of functions between the Bolsheviks and Mensheviks (as though the Bolsheviks also did not “tend” to legal activity in these institutions), which slurs over the fact that the Bolsheviks did so with a revolutionary, and the Mensheviks with an opportunist, purpose. Trotsky actually declares, in black and white (p. 239) that the bloc of the Menshevik leaders of the Petrograd Soviet with the big industrialists of the Provisional Government, after the March Revolution, “meant their break with the proletarian movement.” So that, prior to 1917, the Mensheviks were part of the proletarian movement, according to Trotsky of 1932! And this individual has the assurance to proclaim himself the “defender” of Lenin against his unworthy followers.

But apologies for and whitewashing of the Mensheviks’ anti-revolutionary rôle are a natural and inevitable complement of Trotsky’s systematic concealment and depreciation of the importance of the Bolshevik party organisation. One may note in passing that Trotsky, after flagellating Stalin to his heart’s content, cleverly passes over the fact that the majority decision on the question of unity (adopted before Lenin’s arrival) was that it was possible only with those Mensheviks who held a genuinely anti-“patriotic” standpoint, and that in any case the Bolsheviks would only go into the forthcoming meeting with the Mensheviks unofficially and for information purposes (Proletarskaya Revolutsia, No. 63, p. 155). The lordly Trotsky, as ever, knows only leaders: all the rest and the Party organisation as a whole may pass their resolutions if they please—they remain mere cyphers, “the dung of factional differences.” And even long after Lenin’s arrival, we learn, the party only “finally fell into step” with the workers (p. 368) in October—when, as Trotsky is too modest to recall, he had become one of the Party leaders.

One curious detail of this policy of never representing the Party as something vertebrate, alive, fighting and radiating energy: Trotsky even contrives to suggest that the enormous growth of the Party in membership and influence, from 12,000 in March to 240,000 in September, was something spontaneous. On pp. 430-1 we learn that “the Putilov workers had gone over to the Bolsheviks . . . the growth of the class struggle almost automatically raised the influence of the Bolsheviks . . . the factory and shop committees went over to the Bolsheviks much sooner than the Soviet . . . in the fundamental questions of economic life the Petrograd proletariat . . . had gone over to the Bolsheviks . . . The influence of the Bolsheviks in the metal workers’ union had grown still more swiftly,” etc. If the phrase had occurred once or twice there would have been no special meaning in it, but repeated so persistently, and in the light of all that goes before, its special meaning is unmistakable. Trotsky implies that the Bolsheviks were not a fighting organisation, alive at every point from Lenin to the remotest cell, which battled for its new members and won them from the enemy, but a revolutionary shadow which the enlightened workers at a certain stage (coinciding, so it happens, with the time when Trotsky at last came in) were good enough to clothe in flesh and blood. The history of the Bolshevik Party, in other words, began in 1917. The truth is the very opposite, as every factory in Leningrad could tell: but Trotsky’s objective does not coincide with the truth.

Up to the moment of Trotsky’s entry into the Bolshevik Party in July, 1917, this picture of the Party holds good. At the beginning of July the famous armed demonstration of the Petrograd workers and soldiers, known to history as the “July days,” took place. Then (to quote Lenin), out of the growing fury of the masses at the renewal of the Imperialist war by their “revolutionary” government, “followed the explosion of their anger—an explosion which the Bolsheviks tried to restrain, and to which they naturally had to try and impart the most organised form possible” (Lessons of the Revolution, July, 1917). The measures which the Kerensky Government took against the militant workers, on that occasion, opened a new and decisive chapter in the history of the Revolution.

Trotsky’s one concern in his second volume—devoted almost entirely to the preparation and the aftermath of the July days—is to show once again how the Party was not merely failing to lead the masses, but even distrusted by them. Again and again this theme recurs, like a haunting refrain. “Even broad circles of the Party were beginning to lose patience. . . . ‘Why don’t they get busy up there?’ the soldiers and sailors would ask, having in mind not only the compromise leaders but also the governing bodies of the Bolsheviks (p. 19). . . . ‘We have to play the part of a firehose,’ said a Vyborg Bolshevik (p. 21). . . . The masses did feel that the Party was irresolute (p. 26).... The Bolsheviks were caught up by the movement and dragged into it (p. 29). . . . The workers and soldiers had not yet acquired the conviction that they ought to come out only upon the summons of the Party and under its leadership. The experiences of February and April had taught them rather the opposite (p. 74). . . . From their mighty mass movement the political axis had been torn out (p. 76).” And so on, without end.

The political contradictions involved in this tangle of sham analysis are innumerable. If the “political axis” could be torn out from the mass movement by the betrayal of the opportunist parties—the Mensheviks and Socialist-Revolutionaries—how could they be at the same time rising in revolutionary impatience against the Bolshevik leadership? And particularly, if the Party, they left, was “irresolute.” If the experience of February and April had taught them not to follow the lead of the Party, while in July the Bolsheviks had to be “dragged” into the movement, how was it that the July days were—after a brief period of White Terror—followed by an unexampled growth of confidence in the Bolsheviks? Experience in other lands (the German Communists in 1923, for example), teaches that, if a revolutionary party at critical times lags behind the masses for a few weeks, let alone months, it forfeits their confidence for years to come. But, according to Trotsky, this didn’t happen. On the contrary, he suddenly makes a somersault and announces, in imitation of Lenin (p. 79), that the Bolsheviks were nevertheless right in not making a revolution—the masses were not yet clear and homogeneous enough!

The difference between the Bolshevik Party and the Trotskyist understanding of the masses was never clearer, by the way, than on this point. So far from agreeing with Trotsky’s estimate of the Party’s position at the time, Lenin, on the contrary, wrote that “the Bolshevik organisation alone had moral authority in the eyes of the masses, and induced them to renounce violence. . . . Our party did its revolutionary duty, moving together with the justly indignant masses on July 4” (A Reply, July 26-27, 1917). Again, Trotsky (forgetting his own earlier remarks on the impatience of the masses), writes in the best “blood and iron” style that “the workers and soldiers could not understand (the need for a new revolution). . . . The front and the provinces needed time to make their own inferences from the adventure of the offensive. . . . The Petrograd workers and soldiers had to test the situation with their own experience. . . . The offensive must be given time to exhaust itself” (pp. 87-89)

They had to be taught by hard knocks, says this dispassionate arbiter from the heights of Olympus. Whereas Lenin—while agreeing that the situation in any case was not ripe for an insurrection—points out that the main point is quite a different one: “On July 4, there was still possible a peaceful transference of power to the Soviets, there was still possible a peaceful development of the Russian Revolution. . . . The movement of July 3-4, was the last attempt by means of a demonstration to impel the Soviets to take power” (A Reply). “Precisely before July 4, the slogan of transference of power to the existing Soviets was the only correct one. Then it was possible peacefully, without civil war, for then there were not the systematic acts of violence against the people, introduced after July 4. . . . After July 4, the transference of power to the Soviets became impossible without civil war, since power from July 4-5 passed to the military Bonapartist clique, supported by the Cadets and Black Hundreds.” (They Don’t See the Wood far the Trees, August 19, 1917.)

Trotsky mentions this view of Lenin’s, as he mentions everything, but, in true opportunist fashion, without connecting up events and conclusions. On the contrary, Trotsky makes it quite clear in another connection that he does not agree with this estimate of July 4. Whereas Lenin was most insistent that “the Kerensky ministry is undoubtedly a ministry of the first steps of Bonapartism” (July 29), that “power passed on the 4-5 of July to the military Bonapartist clique” (August 19), and that “power has already been seized and consolidated by them” (September 1), Trotsky revolts against this view—which he carefully represents as Stalin’s (Vol. 2, p. 324)—asserting that in that case there would have been no necessity for the Monarchist General Kornilov to have resorted to insurrection shortly afterwards. That Lenin had already most inconveniently replied in advance to this very point—the Tsar was also in power after the crushing of the Bolshevik—led insurrection of December, 1905, but it took him two general elections before he felt strong enough to re-establish the full dictatorship—is of course of no consequence to Trotsky.

Why is it of consequence to us, however? Partly because it throws light on Trotsky’s differences with Lenin in his estimate of the character of the revolution itself. Lenin said, again and again, that the revolution had actually brought about in real life—and thereby had outgrown—the old Bolshevik slogan of “the revolutionary democratic dictatorship of the proletariat and peasantry” (Works, English edition, Vol. XX., Part i, pp. 120, 125, 133, etc.). Trotsky, on the other hand, asserts that “the régime which issued from the February revolution . . . was a living and exhaustive proof of the fact that such a dictatorship was impossible” (Vol. I, p. 328-9). Lenin said that, owing to lack of organisation and class consciousness among the workers and peasants, which the Mensheviks made worse, the Soviet power was surrendering its authority to the capitalists (Works, Vol. XX, Part i, p. 116). Trotsky, by skilfully sliding from the revolutionary peasantry in particular to the petty-bourgeoisie in general, and from them to the petty-bourgeois parties—Mensheviks and Socialist Revolutionaries—suggests that it was the peasantry (as part of the petty-bourgeoisie) which was “compelled to choose” between the proletariat and the capitalists, i.e., that the Mensheviks and S.R.’s really had no choice but to act as they did.

And, whereas Lenin insisted that the dual power thus created was “strikingly unique . . . unparalleled in history,” because the power of the Provisional Government rested on the support given to the big bourgeoisie by the second government—the Soviet, representing the workers and peasants—Trotsky “simplifies” dual power into “a temporary correlation of powers” through “dread of interference of a third force,” and professes to find numerous parallels in the English Revolution of the XVII. century and the French Revolution of the XVIII (Vol. I, pp. 223-7). Actually, the examples Trotsky quotes are the very opposite of Lenin’s definition: since they show alternative governments fighting for mastery, and not one ruling by grace of the opportunist controllers of the other, as in Russia.

That is quite natural. Trotsky’s whole purpose is to blur the distinction between the Russian Revolution and its predecessors. The distinction that not only were both the proletariat and the peasantry motive forces in the Revolution (Trotsky’s chapter on the peasantry in Vol. 3 is entirely disconnected with all that went before), but that the Soviets which they created were seized upon by the petty bourgeois parties and monstrously utilised as a footstool for continuing capitalist rule. Why should Trotsky blur over this fact? Because it confirmed the Bolshevik conception which Trotsky had fought against for years. The whole course of 1917, and particularly the rôle of the opportunist parties, were a ruthless condemnation of Trotsky’s own political creed and policy right up to 1917—and after it. After all, one cannot fight for half one’s political life for a bloc with the Mensheviks and against the Bolsheviks without committing oneself to an unpleasantly notorious extent.

Incidentally, it is not without significance that Trotsky passes very hastily over the question of how his own organisation—the “Mejrayontsi”—came at last to join the Bolsheviks in July, 1917. Half a page, with a declaration of his own, favouring fusion, quoted from Pravda, is, he thinks, quite enough (Vol. 2, p. 311). Why this coyness? For a simple reason revealed in the Review of the Lenin Institute (No. IV., published in 1925), where Lenin’s notes at the Mejrayontsi conference are reprinted. Trotsky at that Conference opposed immediate unity with the Bolsheviks, which Lenin had suggested; he declared that he could not call himself a Bolshevik, since “the Bolsheviks have debolshevised themselves”: and secured the rejection of Lenin’s proposals. Moreover, as late as the end of June, Trotsky was still paternally reproving (in strangely familiar terms!) the “difficulties in the way of unity due to Bolshevik habits of sectarianism” (Vperiod, No. 5).

Trotsky hides the facts about his own hankering after some bridge between opportunism and revolution—right up to the point when opportunism called in military dictatorship against the masses—for exactly the same reason that he does all in his power to belittle and discredit the revolutionary party, up to the moment he vouchsafed to confer his adherence upon it.

Trotsky’s “History” is much more an apologia of his past—and his present. To many people it may seem strange that one who played a not inconsiderable part in one stage of the revolution—from 1917 to 1923, should descend to counter-revolution. But the history of every revolution knows such cases. And we may safely refer such questioners—as well as those who, to-day also, attack the “exclusiveness” of the Communists, to the remark of Engels that “the movement of the proletariat inevitably passes through various stages of development: at every stage a section of the people stick fast and go no further.” Marx, on the same subject, observed that revolutions have a marvellous facility for throwing out their dross.

~

by Andrew Rothstein · (Marxists Internet Archive, 2008.)

—

Labour Monthly, Vol. 15, December 1933, No. 12.

[notafightr]

It fic exchange!!!

so here's my reddie fic for @disneyfan567​ for the it fic exchange event! no trigger warnings, sorry for any mistakes or lack of skill this displays as i havent written in a long time and this is the first time ive written in this fandom

(°﹏°)

  Eddie was 13 when he moved to Ohio. Sonia decided she had had enough of Derry, and the small town was doing more harm than good to her delicate son. To describe Eddie's reaction, reluctant was an understatement. He was leaving his 6 best friends, his only real friends, all because of his mother's glorified temper tantrum.

  The past 3 years were (in)arguably the best years of his life. He met his best friends, more of a family than his own (which really just consisted of his overbearing mother), he had irreplaceable experiences and memories with his best friends, these friends entirely shaped and nurtured his character. So to have his mother rip all of that away from him, well it understandably upset him. Most of all, he didn't know how he was going to cope with the frequent flashbacks and nightmares that taxed him emotionally and mentally several times a week, dutifully owed to that short, albeit rather traumatic summer of 89’.

  For 3 long, yet oh so short years, Eddie coped with these strains through the support of his friends, especially a loudmouthed, annoying boy with Coke bottle glasses and slightly bucked teeth, named Richard Tozier, who couldn't find it in him to ever stop annoying Eddie, or stop telling him how much he loved him, or stop picking flowers for him on walks because he knew even though Eddie denied it, they really did make Eddie happier than he cared to admit.

  How do you cope with a demon clown terrorising you and your friends’ lives for an entire summer, haunting you as your worst fear, using unholy tactics to scare you in unimaginable ways, trapping you in its crack den, and almost killing you miles below land level, all at the ripe age of 10? Hopefully you found yourself down there with your 6 best friends. You also let your mind do the forgetting. Well, what it can. There's some things you can't forget.

  Until you leave Derry.

  Eddie started forgetting the moment the plane took off, whether he realized it or not. He managed to remember his friends for a short while, but vaguely. He didn't remember the poems Ben gave him every birthday, or that the friendship bracelet on his left wrist was made by thee Beverly Marsh. He didn't remember that the reason his room was always so tidy was because Stan Uris couldn't help himself every time they chose Eddie’s place as the hangout spot (when Sonia wasn't home of course), or all the scary stories Bill liked to tell at their weekly sleepovers at the ass crack of 3 am. He didn't remember how Jessica and Will Hanlon were by far the superior parents of the friend group and the snacks they so generously provided to said group were the best he ever had, no doubt that Mike directly inherited their kind and generous traits.

  When he woke up at the end of his plane ride, he didn't even remember that the lily flower in his hand was given to him as a parting gift by Richie, whose parents picked him up from the airport after he gave one last hug goodbye at the gate and waved Eddie off with flower in hand. Even after intently looking down, confused, and finally remembering it was indeed Richie who gave him the flower, he still didn't remember Richie’s endearing flower giving habit.

  He promised them he'd stay in touch, but it wasn't long before the initials BH, BM, SU, BD, MH, and RT were just meaningless letters next to a series of unknown house phone numbers.

  It wasn't until he forgot one particular conversation with Bill during a sleepover one night in 6th grade that he forgot Richie completely.

  “Bill?” Eddie whispered, lying down in Bill’s bed, not even sure if Bill was awake.

  “Y-yeah?” Bill replied after some silence.

  “So, we're best friends right?”

  “Well y-yeah, I m-mean all-” Bill started before being interrupted.

  “No I mean like, I know the seven of us are best friends obviously, but I mean, we’re best-best friends, you know what I mean? Like even before the lucky seven it's always been us right?”

  “Oh. Yeah I s-suppose.” Bill reassured him.

  It took Eddie a second to try and gather his thoughts and articulate what he was trying to say.

  “Well, I feel like, Richie’s different from all of you.”

  “Yeah n-no sh-shit Eddie, that k-kid can't k-keep his mou-” Bill was again interrupted.

  “No, that's not what I mean. I mean,” Eddie again had to organize his thoughts in his head, which proved to be difficult when not even he knew what he was thinking. “I mean I feel different with him. Like when he gives me flowers and stuff, and he's the only one that calls me Eds. But I know you're my best friend. My best-best friend. Am I wrong? Maybe Richie is my best-best friend?” At this point it felt like Eddie was just saying it out loud for himself.

  After a few seconds, which felt like several minutes to Eddie, Bill giggled.

  “What?” Eddie asked, almost panicked.

  While Bill didn't necessarily believe this, the thought amused him greatly. “It s-sounds like you have a c-cr-crush on h-him.”

  “Wh-... you th-” Eddie just about got whiplash from Bill’s statement. “You think I have a crush on him?!”

  “I n-never said that… I j-just said it s-sounds like you do.”

  “I'm not… I don't like boys like that. My mom told me what it means if you do and what happens, and I don't think I do,” he backtracked.

  At this point, Bill was almost asleep. “Okay Eddie, that's fine,”

  “I think maybe you're just both my best friends,” Eddie assured, but undoubtedly he said this more for himself than for Bill. Bill probably succumbed to slumber before Eddie could even start.

  Once any evidence of this conversation having occurred left his brain, any trace of Richie was buried deep under newer things. The others were already long gone. The nightly nightmares he experience fizzled out eventually, but they did resurface every once in a while. On the other side of the same coin however, he did have dreams about the good times with the losers. He never remembered them when he woke up, though.

  Not to mention, he was frequently frustrated at his lack of motivation to clean his room properly, wondering why his always clean room in Derry suddenly had no place in his new life in Ohio. Where's a Stan Uris when you need him?

  He tried to make friends. For a bit he was even in a nice friend group of people he clicked fairly well with, they were funny and kind and they welcomed him with open arms. But nothing felt right. They were funny, but it hurt to laugh at their jokes, they were nice, but almost too nice. If anyone so much as cracked a your mom joke, Eddie's first thought was an annoyed “Stop trying to be-” but always stopped short right there.

  Stop trying to be who?

  He didn't know. He didn't remember.

  So at the end of his sophomore year, when he asked his mom to sign his permission form for the classes he wanted to take the upcoming school year, his mom declined.

  “Eddie Bear, we're moving back to Derry this summer.” Sonia said apologetically, understanding he'll have to say goodbye to the friends he doesn't have.

  “Wait, what?” confused was an understatement. He had to rack his brain for a moment to even remember what “Derry” meant.

  “It’s getting difficult for me to support us financially here, so we're moving back near your Aunt Jodie and she's going to help us a little bit. We should start packing no later than the end of May, we’ll be out of the house and into the new one at the beginning of July in time for you to to get settled and start school at Derry High.”

  Eddie had never felt more indifferent in his whole entire life, while also feeling an inkling of hope he didn't quite understand. If anything, his biggest curiosity was why he didn't feel even a whisper of sadness for leaving the people he knew in Marietta, Ohio. While Eddie didn't care about moving back to Derry, and it meant almost nothing to him on the surface, the Eds inside of Eddie couldn't help peeking through.

  So they moved back. Eddie finished packing up his belongings before the deadline his mother gave to start packing had even passed, and he didn't bother telling any of his “friends” (perhaps acquaintances is a more applicable word) that he was leaving because the truth was, it was more trouble than it was worth. They would no doubt care more than twice as much as he did, so he left without so much of a trace of a goodbye.

  Now that Eddie was 16, he could drive. While Sonia wouldn't buy Eddie his own car, not over her dead body, she did allow him to use hers when it was available, and given her physical state and social life, it was almost always available. After a solid 8 hours of unpacking his things in his new, snug room on an otherwise uneventful July evening, he picked up his mom's keys.

  “Bye Mom!” he shouted loud enough for his mom to hear without bothering to hear her response as he shut the door.

  He shoved the key in ignition. Despite not having been in town for 3 years, he was still able to navigate the area without assistance. He drove to the coffee shop that he had vague memories of visiting during middle school winters for hot chocolate with some friends whose faces he couldn't quite remember yet.

  Walking in it didn't look much different. Not that Derry would care enough to update the coffee shop, or any shop for that matter, for any reason.

  “Hi, how can I help you?” a blonde girl at the register asked uninterestedly.

  She definitely hates her job, Eddie thought while pointlessly perusing the menu, already knowing what he planned to order. Sophomore year was not academically kind to Eddie, and a caffeine addiction to compensate for the mass amount of all nighters pulled did occur.

  “Can I just have a black coffee with sugar?” he asked while digging through his tattered black wallet he received as a birthday gift in seventh grade. He then flinched his head up in response to hearing another employee drop an entire pitcher of coffee on the floor.

  “Oh, fuck,” said worker pointedly exclaimed, which not only stirred a giggle out of Eddie, but his voice in combination with his oddly familiar black curly hair caused his heart drop, though completely lost as to why.

  “Your name?”

  “Hello?” She asked after a moment.

  “Hello!” the blonde girl repeatedly nagged, trying to catch Eddie’s lost attention.

  “What? Sorry I missed that,” Eddie finally grounded himself. Unfortunately his attempt to catch the other employees face failed as he stayed turned away and then hurried to his hands and knees on the floor.

  “I need your name for your order.”

  “Oh yeah of course, Eddie.” Not even seconds after his response, he heard something nearly inaudible, completely not understandable from the employee on the floor, which was confirmed by the blonde girl, which Eddie now gathered from her name tag to be Sarah, who exasperatedly asked about the other employee’s struggle.

  “You alright down there?”

  “Yeah, I’m just peachy, Sarah,” hearing the voice even clearer instilled a visceral reaction even stronger in Eddie once again.

  Sarah took Eddie’s cash, distributed his change, and set his cup down on the back counter for when the other employee to make when he was done cleaning up his mess. He picked a seat close by the counter and waited. After a few minutes, longer than probably usual, given time dedicated to cleaning up the coffee on the floor, Eddie heard his name called by the same antagonist and saw his coffee set on the counter, but employee was again out of sight. Eddie grabbed the coffee and with no reason to stay he made his way back to the car.

  Drinking his iced coffee on his way home, at a stop light he picked up his drink and studied it curiously. He noticed the boy who made his drink must have added his name for some reason because when Sarah set it down for him to make, there was nothing written on it. However, clearly on the cup, was his name:

  While looking at the little flower next to his name made him smile, it was a cute gesture, it filled him with a familiar sense of longing and loneliness, as if he was missing something. He got home, finished his coffee, continued unpacking, dreadfully argued with his mom about leaving the house without telling her where he was going, and went to sleep. It was less of a need for caffeine but more of an eagerness to learn about a curly headed, clumsy employee that brought him back to the coffee shop the next day.

  So he came back. He came back at the same time too, to have his best chance of the boy being on shift.

  “How can I help you?” Sarah asked.

  “Black coffee with sugar, Eddie.” successfully staying on track with Sarah this time around.

  Again, she set the blank cup on the counter and just like before, his name with a dainty doodle of a flower beside it. Unfortunately, even if he wanted to say anything to the employee which Eddie now knew wears a big pair of glasses, his introverted nature wouldn't allow it. Back to home it was, to continue setting up his new room.

  The next couple of weeks was the same routine, and quite lonely. Being in the middle of summer, with no school to be his vessel of socializing, and no friends, it was him, his lonely self, and his mom. For all intents and purposes, him and his lonely self.

  However one morning, in a hurry as he had a family gathering for brunch to attend to, he knew he wouldn't be able to get to the coffee shop in the evening so he came in the morning, despite knowing the shift would likely not be the same.

  He walked in and noticed it was in fact not Sarah at the register but didn't look further.

  “How can I help you?” The boy at the register was looking down.

  “Just a black coffee and sugar. Eddie.” He got the cash from his wallet and told the boy he could keep the change as he was already late to his aunt's house and confident he could do without the dollar and 74 cents. As he walked to the counter to get his coffee as soon as it was ready, he noticed the boy scribbling his name and a flower on the cup but his brain didn't process anything other than how late he was. He took his coffee eagerly and made his way back to his car, knowing his mom (who was already there after being picked up by her sister) was no stranger to yelling at Eddie for “caring more about himself than his family”.

  On the drive to his house he allowed himself time to think and thought about the boy at the register. He was familiar to Eddie and not just because he's seen him every day for two weeks, making his regular order with ease.

  The Coke bottle glasses.

  The flower.

  The unkempt, black, curly hair.

  But that was still too out of reach for him. He thought about it for as long as he could without having an aneurysm from working his brain too hard and decided he would come back the next morning for the same shift.

  Sonia greeted Eddie outside before he was able to come inside.

 “Eddie bear, why are you so late?”

  “Sorry ma, I was up late finishing my summer assignment and I stopped to get coffee when I left,” Eddie started despite knowing this wouldn't be enough to appease his mom.

  “Aunt Jodie is being very kind to help us out and this is the first time seeing family since we've gotten back, you should show your gratitude properly. Say thank you when we come in.”

  “I will, Ma. Why didn't you just wake me up and take the car here?”

  “Aunt Jodie wanted to catch up with me before everyone else got here. She took us to breakfast. I figured you'd have enough autonomy to drive yourself here on time. Are you feeling well? Did you sleep enough?”

  “Yes, ma!” Eddie spoke as he got out of the car and locked it, handing the keys to his mom. “I just overslept. Sorry for being late.”

  However, while his cousins and aunts and uncles were asking him how Ohio was and if he was sad to leave his friends and if he left a broken hearted girlfriend back in Marietta, all he could think about was the coffee shop employee who never failed to doodle a flower next to his name.

  He got home late, worked on his summer assignment, because against what he told his mom, he had in fact not started yet. He made sure to wake up at the same time as the morning before and headed to the coffee shop. To his pleasure, the boy was at the register.

  “How can I help you?”

  Eddie stared at him.

  “Uh,” He couldn't help but chortle as Eddie stared, wordlessly, and then it appeared as though a freight train of memories hit him square in the head.

  “Oh my God,” Eddie nearly dropped to the floor. “Richie? Richie fucking Tozier? Is this a joke?”

  “Ya know Eds, I was starting to think you really forgot me. Or maybe you just hated me.” Richie allowed himself to laugh.

  “I… I did forget you? But how? We-” and at that moment Richie could visibly see It creep itself back into Eddie’s memories.

  “Holy shit? You forgot about that too? Do you have amnesia? What happened to that pretty little head of yours?” Richie put his hand on Eddie's forehead and pretended to feel his temperature.

  “Oh my God,” whiplash had struck Eddie again. “I need to sit down,” He started to move to a chair nearby when he remembered more. “The others! Beverly, and Ben, and Stan and Bill and Mike!” he quite literally felt like someone waking up from a 20 year coma, rediscovering everything that happened before he fell asleep.

  “They're peachy. Stan's actually getting back from visiting his family in Florida today.” Richie informed him. “Any reason you never stayed in touch like you said you would? Left a man hanging.”

  “It's like, wait- those initials were yours!” Suddenly three years of wondering who those house numbers in his binder belonged to clicked. “It’s like I forgot you guys as soon as I left,”

  “That soon? Ed's, you wound me,” Richie teased. “But you're still wearing the friendship bracelet Bev made.” He held out his wrist and displayed a bracelet of the same pattern but in different colors. “What’s she got that I don't?”

  For the first time in 3 years, Eddie let out a genuine laugh.

  “Are you busy, cutie? I'm on break in 15 minutes and I can get someone to cover the rest of my shift,” Richie asked, hopeful.

  “Yeah that's fine.. uh.. have you been working every day? All day?” Eddie asked, concerned.

  “Well the past couple of weeks at least a couple of us from the gang has been visiting family or doin’ some crazy shit so I figured I'd make use of time and make some money, we're doing a road trip in a couple of weeks.”

  “Oh that's cool-”

  “You're invited, if you want, obviously. What better way to celebrate you coming back than a road trip? Ed's, just wait till’ they find out you're back-” Richie cut himself off when he noticed another man walk into the shop and they both decided to end the conversation there so he could order. “Okay hold on I'm gonna take his order, and I'll be out in 10 minutes, you can wait here if you want?”

  “Sounds good,” Eddie couldn't help the smile on his face, it's contagiousness showing in Richie's smile.

  After waiting for a bit, Richie came from the back out of his uniform, a bag on his shoulder, and a rose in his hand. He held it out to Eddie.

  “Do you just, carry flowers with you?” Eddie looked at him curiously.

  “No but I- after I saw you yesterday morning and I passed this one on my way to work, something told me I should grab it.” Eddie took it. “Flowers still get ya goin’?” Eddie punched him in the shoulder.

  “Thanks, Rich.” He smiled.

  “Where to now, spaghetti?” Richie put his arm around Eddie.

  “For 3 glorious years I never had to hear that, don't call me spaghetti!”

  “Okay Eds, answer the question!”

[j4nn4s]

rules:

always repost the rules

answer the questions given to you by the one who tagged you!

give 11 questions

tag 11 people

i was tagged by @isakvdhflorenzi, ty miss lorena <3 1. Is the social media presence of the characters important to how you view the quality of the remake/show?

hm well skam nl is my favorite and their social media game is trash LMAOOO so generally No but i do feel like remakes who DO have such a good presence kind of elevate the show and i think it’s pretty heartwarmin to see some remakes go sm farther than skam with social media and puttin out educational and IN CHARA resources like skames does this so well and i feel like in that way, the team is really really spreadin skam’s spirit via these resources (like joana’s billion bpd awareness ig accounts and lucas rubio’s yt channel)

2. Least favourite clip of the show? Why?

tbh there are definitely some duds but probably one of the clips with sana gettin herself into a hole in s4 just bc some were hard to watch cus cringey or yikes .... idk i cant think of others LMAO

3. Which character did you feel the most connected to and why?

ijeoiqjiwoij even tho even is my all time fave skam chara, i have to say isak for all of these reasons 

4. Your least favourite part of every season?

season 1 - tbh even though i really enjoyed this season, it does take a while for it to build up like i rmr at first not being that interested until ep6 maybe ?? which is hard when you’re trying to get your friends to watch but they have to wait until ep6 before shit starts RLLY buildin up and gettin wild

season 2 - hm ig noora chasin after william ??

season 3 - bro NOTHINGGG call me a purist but its such a refined masterpiece like the pacing is good the characterization is so good ugh i deadass cant think of anythin

season 4 - i always felt a little ??? w noora being sana’s bff ig bc from s1-s3 it didn’t Feel like they were that close like even in noora’s pov, sana wasn’t really a part of it that much ?? like eva was more of noora’s bff ?? so i feel like it would have made more sense if maybe sana spoke more with chris or vilde bc sana and vilde eventually seemed to get closer esp with kosegruppa and chris has always been by sana’s side ?? idk that always confused me

5. What is your opinion on the cast’s participation on social media? Do you prefer it when the cast aren’t that involved like the Skam cast, or do you like a lot of content like the Fr cast do?

tbh i don’t care much abt the casts LMAOOO if anythin it kind of brings more harm as seen with the harassment axel and maxence get and also can bring more controversy like with irene (which honestly is p sad considerin how much i love skames bc now i feel super :/ watchin it like she shouldve just had private accts at this point)

6. Favourite song you found from Skam or the remakes?

OMFGGG love this question .... def doorman by slowthai and mura masa bc its one of my fave songs now and i got it from skam nl <3 ugh taste

7. If you could decide which characters from Skam got a season, who would you choose?

OOOHHH ugh torn bc i like isak’s pov but also i want even’s so might have to forfeit isak season for even season ....... hm so probs vilde, sana, even, noora (maybe not w william tho) and honestly maybe jonas too ??

8. Are there any moments that you liked in the show that everyone else seems to hate?

IJXDWQOIJJ yes .... remakes-wise, people hate skam nl s2’s last half but i enjoyed it for the most part ... i think the pacing was off for the last ep but personally, clip 50 made up for it and is p god tier imo ..... and also don’t think the first half of ep10 is enough to discredit the entire season bc i rlly loved seeing liv’s pov and have sm fave moments from the season 

but skam wise, omg might get a lil controversial w this one IM SORRY !!! im bein honest and its Just my opinion ok 

personally s2 got me more invested than s1 and i don’t think its a super bad season like i didnt really say many problems wrong with it until i got on tumblr wiejioqjoiqjq i was sort of interested in the questions that the noora/william dynamic brought up which is, as expressed in william’s war speech to noora, that nothing is ever black/white which i feel was a huge message and feeds into the ‘you never know what ppl are going through’ theme of the season ... like i like the idea of someone like noora, who can have a black/white mentality (as seen in the first clip of s2 when she tells vilde that they can’t have the tannin company as their sponsor bc they objectify women or smth but misses the context and what it could mean for the bus monetarily bc shes caught up in bein ‘woke’) having to break out of that and see more than one side ... and i think remakes like skam austin expanded on this idea well like when zoya was like ‘must be so nice being right all the time’ which i Do feel like is an important for youth to know today .... bc i think its so easy to get caught up in the idea of being so objectively right and morally superior that people lose sight of the more nuanced characteristics to life ... (omg long ramble BUT)

also LMAOOOOO this one might be more controversial as it pertains to bench scene s4 ok oops again doNT GOTTA AGREE !! ........ but i feel like the scene had a lot of good intentions ... i was def kind of cringing a bit tho bc i understand the subject’s sensitivity and how these topics are hard to talk about but i genuinely feel like they both made Some points and should listen to each other .... like as Hard and as maybe ‘unwoke’ it is to admit, unfortunately you sort of do have to answer the tough questions bc that way we learn from each other .... and i perfectly understand why some ppl wouldn’t want to do this and i certainly am tired abt havin to answer shit abt my sexuality or stupid male questions abt women but if u dont answer them, people do go lookin for answers still and the internet is such a shitty place that its pretty easy (esp with youtube’s algorithm) to lead you to ignorant ppl and perhaps radicalization .... questions help us to better understand our community and sometimes they can have good intentions too but we have to ask and answer them or else people will make up answers (which ive literally seen and its honestly worse to see fake as shit and UNINFORMED answers bc ppl did not want to ask you or ppl of ur identity, esp when they’re already startin from a place of hate .... but i rather have ppl ask me patronizing questions than have them spread false info bc that can do much more harm in the long run) however i DO think that isak should also consider sana’s side and i sort of wish we saw him conceding more bc they both have smth to learn from one another, like sana shouldn’t just be learnin from isak, isak needs to learn from sana too

PHEW SORRY QWIOJQWIO girl i just got opinions on some things this is when my desc rlly comes in handy .... oqjdwqioj

9. What did you learn from the show?

omg honestly too much to write here tbh ..... but if it says anythin im (very slowly) in the works of a three part skam essay about basically how skam teaches us to be better humans and how to better treat the people we care about diowjqioj essentially the three biggest themes of the show: you never know what someone is going through so always be kind, always communicate with your friends, and no person is ever alone and i feel like these are definitely rlly good messages to live by (also livet er nå BITCH !!!)

10. What is your favourite headcanon about your favourite characters?

omg tbh i could not tell u at all how the skam charas are doing except i hope even is okay thats all im thinkin of ok .... OIWXIOJX omg remakes wise tho ..... honestly im so bad at this girl IDK !!!!! LMAO i have to really think i have a bit of vdh and dutch even but thats bc we know like Zero abt them so its easier oijwiojqio idk liv and noah bein cute as shit ..... OH WAIT personally i feel like janna got a bunch of pansexual energy so my BIGGG hc is that she’s pan also bc she’s one of my all time fave charas and my fkn url so itd be dope if she was pan ok boom

11. What is your opinion on fanfiction in the fandom?

tbh i don’t read skam fanfiction but i don’t mind reading some from the remakes (tho still its rare) ... eiojeioqw i just don’t trust anyone but julie to write skam charas bc i think that’s how precious the show is to me LMAO like idk everything ive seen of skam fanfiction and ficlets and one shots, i could never get into bc the tone is just so out of character or there will be lines that just take me out of the fic bc im like this !!!! is not !!! how the chara acts !!!! so yeah idk not rlly a fan bc of my purist ass but i dont mind others reading it

Questions:

1. Favorite quote of the show?

2. Which country would you like to see have the next remake? Do you have any headcanons?

3. Which season would you rewrite and how would you rewrite it?

4. What clips do you personally like or don’t mind, but others hate?

5. Which songs do you think SKAM or the remakes should have included? For which moments?

6. Who would you give SKAM season five to and what topics and themes would it cover?

7. What moment spoke to you or touched you from SKAM the most?

8. How did you find SKAM? How did you feel about it right after watching?

9. Have you shared SKAM with any friends in real life? What did they think of it?

10. Of the remakes, which characters are your favorite of their SKAM counterparts? (Ex. who is the best Vilde remake? Eva? etc.)

11. How do you feel about the SKAM (and remakes) tumblr fandom?

I tag: @smileykeijser @whatadaze @queenofpurgatoryx @itlukey @skamyeets @shaykeijser @megeliz01 @isakcijser @wackpainterkid @axelauriantblot @kar-d-momme

(omg ik some of yall have been tagged so just ignore if u dont want to do it ok im srry it was in the RULES!)