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#although i do agree as much as the movies are meh it would really have been great seing katniss portrayed by a woc
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my unpopular hunger games opinion is that even though i headcanon, katniss as a woc, collins probably didn’t when writing her. there is no need to give her any props or praise her for writing poc. as far as i’m aware suzanne collins has never complained that the movie white-washed her character or corrected the assumptions which says enough about what she thinks. if people want to complain they should complain how a character who is described with racially ambigous features is always seen as white bc white is the default.
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thisisthewaytomando · 2 years
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youtube
adored this video. I have to say, I agree with most of what he said (&I love video essays) I wonder what his thoughts are regarding the she hulk finale lmao
My opinion is this:
I’ve been a fan of the MCU for most of my life. But it has (imo) deteriorated as he mentions in the video above. I don’t think I could’ve put my sentiments as eloquently tho. I know people have been ranking MCU movies/tv shows for this phase so I’m going to do that (mostly because I can). These are all my opinions and I discuss this with respect (as I said I’ve been a fan like my whole life & I still am rn)
TV/Disney Plus shows
1. moon knight (although it feels separate from the MCU, & I kinda like that )
2. hawkeye (genuinely funny & I enjoyed it)
3. Loki (it’s Loki (#1) and 2 idk I enjoyed it)
4. What if (fascinated me & I’ve read marvel zombie comics although I do know that’s a separate project)
5. Wandavision (last episodes were the best imo, I was wondering what was going on at first )
6. The Falcon & Winter Soldier (Bucky and Sam are my favorite characters but this show sucked sorry not sorry)
7. Ms Marvel (cringey, I know it’s not for my age group but i thought it was kinda boring)
8. I am groot (respectfully wtf)
9. She-hulk (trainwreck, hated pretty much every second of it, with the exception of daredevil of course, imo they did her character dirty. I like Jen but this was just terrible )
MCU Phase 4 Movies (wakanda forever tbd)
1. Shang Chi (phenomenal)
2. Spider-Man No Way Home (I LOVE Spider-Man although Andrew Garfield is my fave)
3. multiverse of madness (more horror, liked it)
4. Black Widow (sorry but meh)
5. Eternals (😡🤮, felt like DC knockoff (and I’m not a DC fan) & I really didn’t like it, was disappointed bc I thought I would )
6. Thor Love & Thunder (🤮, absolutely horrendous)
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why-what-no · 2 years
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Dating Bella Swan Would Include
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Pairing: Bella Swan x Reader
Warnings: Wuthering Heights. God, why did I make this so long.
Notes: Yes, I’m outing myself as a Twilight fan and a Bella simp, fight me. I could treat her right. (And no, I don’t support a lot of what SMeyer wrote in those books).
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When you first heard of Bella Swan, you didn’t really care. She was more of a conversation topic for the guys or the school gossips.
Even when she first arrived, snatched up by Jessica and her friends, you didn’t care at first.
She was just some classmate
Sure, she was cute. But definitely the shy type, clearly uncomfortable with the level of awe she was receiving from the guys in your classes.
You guys first spoke a few days after she arrived. She was in the parking lot, leaning against her car. A book in her hand with a title you recognized.
“Wuthering Heights, huh?” You tilted your head to get a better look at the book title.
She was surprised for a second, not used to people asking her about books. People asking her about anything she liked, actually. “Um, yeah, have you read it?”
“Yep.”
Bella sat up a bit. “Oh, what did you think?”
“Meh.” You shrugged, being honest. “Not great. Everyone kinda sucks. It’s cool that you like it though.”
“But that’s the point.” You were a little caught off guard by her sudden investment in your conversation of your dislike of the book. But also glad to see her animated about something. “The best thing about them is their love.”
“Obsession isn’t love.”
“It’s not obsession.” The pretty brunette argued, mildly stuttering-ly. “Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same.” The halfway triumphant face Bella made when she quoted the book was kind of cute if you were honest.
You chuckled. “Fair enough, I’ll give that book one thing, it had a few good quotes. Although I prefer that heaven quote, personally. You know… I said his heaven would be only half alive; and he said mine would be drunk: I said I’d fall asleep in his; and he said he couldn’t breathe in mine”
You grinned at her, waving goodbye as the bell rang.
Bella just stared after you. Other people in Forks were interested in her, but none except you actually talked to her about things she liked. Even if you didn’t like them as well.
She started to pay attention to you the next day, curiosity about Edward Cullen being replaced by curiosity about you.
Fighting through her anxiety, she approached you in the library the next day.
“What do you think of Jane Austin?” Bella immediate winced at her bluntness as you turned to her in suprise.
But, thankfully, you didn’t comment on that. “Umm, I only got halfway through Sense & Sensibility. So I can’t really say.”
She was a little crestfallen. “You didn’t like that one either?”
“No, I liked it. But I got really busy, and it was a library book. So I had to hand it in before it got due.
“Oh.” Bella had no idea why she was relieved that you liked that book. “You can borrow mine, if you want? I can… drop it off at your place. Tomorrow, maybe?”
While you didn’t quite know why she cared so much about it, you agreed. It was the weekend, and your parents were busy. So there was no problem about Bella stopping by.
Well, no problems except the rain. But for some reason she turned up anyway.
“You could have stayed home. I would’ve understood.” You chuckled helping her out of her jacket.
“I know.” She gratefully took the towel you handed her, giving you the book she had been hiding from the rain under her jacket. “I just… It’s a bit of rain.”
You knew she was lying, it was obvious from the way she looked outside that she wasn’t happy about the storm. You supposed there wasn’t much rain in Arizona. “Okay, well. How about you hang out here until the weather gets a bit better. I can turn on the movie?”
“The movie?”
“You know.” You held up her copy of Sense & Sensibility, obviously meaning that.
“Oh… sure.” She blushed a little. “Can I just call my dad first? Let him know I’m at a friend’s place?”
When Bella returned from the phone, the two of you curled up on the couch. Her eyes were focused on the movie, giving you a chance to look at her properly.
The two of you got much closer after that. When Cullen returned to bio class from wherever he had been, he saw that Bella had already moved to a back table with you
That family moved away soon after that, not telling anyone about it. You weren’t surprised, they had always been weirdos.
When you finally admitted your feeling for her, it was definitely awkward. And for a long moment, you were sure that she didn’t feel the same.
But to your relief, she did. She kissed you gently, like she was afraid of hurting you. Or of you disappearing on her.
So many things in her life were uncertain, with Bella always being the one to make other people lives easier.
But she didn’t have to do that with you.
Most dates included movie nights are your house, cuddling under a blanket.
You’d listen to her talk about the books and songs she liked, just like she would do for you. Bella usually wasn’t comfortable with questions and attention. But she liked knowing you were interested in what she had to say.
Charlie took it pretty well when Bella told him, as you had already been around their house a lot. He was a little surprised, but already liked you. He knew you cared about his daughter.
She normally liked to avoid school dances and stuff, but if you wanted to do it she would go just for you. Letting you pick her outfit, watching you dance with your friends while looking all nice.
When it came to Jacob, he was a little defensive around you at first. Still having a crush on Bella.
And at one point you had to shut that down, telling him that if he really cared about her he would grow up and let them just be friends.
He accepted your relationship after that, becoming your friend as well. In fact, once he got over Bella and found a girlfriend of his own, you four would do double dates sometimes.
You and Bella were a steady couple. You knew she had a hard time letting people look after her or letting herself be happy. But you reassured her that you were on her side.
She was so grateful that you had spoken to her all those months ago.
You guys planned your future. Neither of you wanted to get married too early, letting things happen naturally. But you guys went to Arizona for university, with Bella wanting to be an English teacher
Her mother loved you, just like her dad did. Both of them seeing how much happier Bella was now that you two were together.
Your future apartment was cozy. Filled with her books, maybe a pet, and all of your love for each other.
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lilsuzn · 3 years
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MLQC Victor - NSFW abc headcanons (REMASTERED)
Fandom: Mr. Love: Queen’s Choice
Warnings: Explit sexual content (GN READER)
it's what I posted a while ago, but better - I changed some things, I deleted some thing and wrote new. I think it's much better now
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A = Aftercare (What they are after sex?)
Victor is a man that has his values straight
You are the most important part of his life (even if he sometimes struggles to shop it) and he will do anything for you… and only for you
Other people don’t matter. He only takes what he wants and leaves.
But you - his sweetest, dearest, little love… can ask anything and everything (well, almost - see N).
You crave massages? He will buy the most luxurious oils on the market, might even take a course to perfect his skills to give you more pleasure
Want to take a bath? He will have a bathtub installed if he doesn’t have one already
Pillowtalk, kissing, snuggling, another round? No need to say it twice. He leaves to please you
When it comes to him, he likes to pull you close and tell you all the things he has no courage to say at any other time
Leave no space for misunderstanding in the department of his unconditional, boundless, eternal love and devotion for you
Tell you just how happy he is to have you and how everything is worthless in comparison to you
After he makes sure you’ve been pleasured throughly already, he will want to share a shower
And make no mistake - he will wash you. You can wash him too, if you want, but taking care of that pretty body of yours is his responsibility
B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
His favorite body part is his waist
It wasn’t easy to get that V shaped body and he is extremely proud of this accomplishment…
Especially when he sees your hungry gaze roaming his torso up and down
And you… He couldn’t possibly choose one part
Beautiful legs, rounded butt, soft abdomen and that gorgeous, gorgeous smile
Yeah…
No…
That would be your thighs when it comes to the sexual aspect
You have such a delicate skin there. So suckable. Kissable. More plush than any pillow could ever be
He feels so secure and at ease when they squeeze around his head as you ride his face.
The sound of his hips slapping against them - heavenly
Not much can make him calmer than your lovely, plump thighs
C = Cum (Anything to do with cum)
It should come (hihihi) as no surprise that he loves to spill inside
It’s so intimate… Bonding…
Doesn’t really like to cum onto you for reasons he himself doesn’t really understand
It just feels… somewhat degrading? And he doesn’t like it that way?
Then again cuming into your mouth is a strong YES. Maybe it’s because of how enthusiastically you take him in
How you collect all the spill from your chin and lick it off your fingers like it was some kind of delicious delicacy
That sight makes him hard all over again…
D = Dirty secret (Pretty self explanatory - a dirty secret of theirs)
He has a folder of your photos on his computer
Some of them were taken with consent… Some without you realising…
Because you were in his bed sleeping in your naked glory… And he could only stop himself the first, like 20 (?) times
He sorts them by aesthetic and cuteness/sexiness
Jacks off to them when you’re not around
Most of them are very artistic. He tries his best to make them as good as the ones he was using before you… (see J)
E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)
He slept with a few girls in college, but he saw it only as ‘taking care of his sexual needs’ - no real feelings included
He had one dedicated booty call - a girl who fell in love with him despite him saying that he only only sees her for sex
That period really allowed him to explore his sexuality
So he knows what he likes and what to do, so his partner likes it too
F = Favorite position (This goes without saying)
Everything when he takes you from the back
He’s rather keen on yanking hair, slaping ass…
But when it comes to the person he loves - you, he likes to face each other during sex
He wants to kiss your face, neck and chest. Nuzzle his face into your abdomen while he’s going down from his height
Your legs thrown over his shoulders so he can slap his hips against your soft thighs
Or legs pressed to your sides, hands gripping your thighs
And he can’t even attempt to lie he doesn’t absolutely love when you sit on his lap… or get on top in general
Or when your thighs grip his head when you 69 on the couch while ‘watching’ a movie. Your lips sloppy around him as his tongue pleasures you with most precision and dedication
G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc.)
No goofy.
If they start to joke around, they get spanked. HARD.
H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)
Victor is a passionate swimmer, so most of his body is hairless
But he doesn’t shave his pubes. Finds it weird to be completely bare down there and the first time he had sex with a completly hairless girl, he was a bit taken aback with her baby like smoothness.
Only trims them with a ‘pubes razor’ which is his old razor that he doesn’t use for face anymore, because he got a better one from his aunt for Christmas
Carpet matches the drapes
I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment? The romantic aspect)
No goofy.
Only love and eternal devotion.
He will caress and leave kisses all over your body. Keep you close in the warmest and most loving embrace
No dummies or idiots in bed. Only treasures and loves
Almost like he’s trying to make it up to you for his tendency to be so aloof on a daily basis
The sweet talk doesn’t stop there, but I already said everything about it in A
J = Jack off (Masturbation headcanon)
This man didn’t have time to waste on women when he was building his empire, so he naturally spend quite a lot of his life masturbating instead of having sex
He doesn’t really enjoy porn, though. It’s too cartoonish for him. He much prefers to look through lingerie commercials or nude photoshoots - the more artistic the better
After he reunites with you, he starts to feel all that pent up sex tension and starts to jack off almost every day
Thinking about you. Looking at photos of you. Carving you with every small bit of his being
K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)
First of all - seeing his partner being pleasured. Either by him or by a vibrating toy plugged into them or pressed against their sensitive spots. He doesn’t even pump himself watching. He’s way too consumed with the enticing sights
Double penetration. His huge dick in one whole, dildo in another… Just thinking about it gets him going
He can’t deny himself at least some manhandling (if you consent - obv). Although he doesn’t go full on dom every time (at least with you) he seems to be unable to deny himself some hair pulling and choking... Although he almost does it lovingly? Spanking and whipping will surely also happen from time to time. Can get very rough when jealous
Also a slight daddy kink. When he hears it slip past your lips in the form of a joke - he feels some strange tingling in his groin and it’s not a venereal disease
If you sit on his lap, make a cute, helpless expression and ask daddy to play with you… It just turns him into a primal animal with no self restraint
That he kinda always seems to be
L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)
Where nobody can hear them
Or see them
Anywhere with a stable surface really, but he needs to know you will have full privacy
Would never agree for public sex
All the sweet sounds and expressions he makes you do are his and only his to experience
M = Motivation (What turns them on/gets them going)
Stress, irritation, anger, hurt… Sex is a great way for him to gat this weight of his chest since he doesn’t really like to think those negative feeligs through
Or any feelings, if we’re at it
A nice butt is also a motivation, especially when it’s attached to a fine pair of legs
But both of these factors aren’t a guarantee of a turn on and even if they have that impact on him, he still will most likely not act on it
What he really struggles to control is a real attraction that reaches what’s beyond physical
A beautiful, hardworking and open-minded person is something Victor finds hard to ignore
N = No (Something they wouldn’t do/turn offs)
No sharing
No blood play
No permanent marking
Nothing too forcefull or aggressive
No sex before assigning boundaries and exchanging preferences
O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
As I already said In B, Victor is an oral lover
More into giving than receiving, but would never push his lover away
(you can always 69, right?)
The man is humming in pleasure as his tongue slides along your sex
Is more than willing to go for hours if only you let him
The more you moan the more intense his movements become
His main goal is to please
The secondary one is to be the best at yet another thing
P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)
He has two base modes
One: I love you, my sweet creature - all about measured, unhurried but hard thrust. True, pure love-making
Two: Little girls don’t get a say in how daddy fucks them - you’re tearing up, sobbing, drooling and he gets even more turned on by it. Fucks harder and faster then you both believed possible. Years of engaging in sports come to show themselves
Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
He will participate when the occasion occurs
Might even initiate an occasion
But it’s not really sex for him. It’s a quickie
And when compared to the real love-making with you… it’s just meh
R = Risk (Are they game to experiment? Do they take risks? etc.)
When it comes to taking risks, I believe I already made it clear that he isn’t too into that
If someone walked in you, it would be very upsetting for him
If you got accidentally hurt would break his heart
But experiment he would happily
New toys, new positions, new kinks… He will try anything once
Well, almost anything (see N)
S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for? How long do they last?)
We all have our better and worst days, and this man has a whole company to run. It’s only natural for him to be tired
So usually he won’t last for more than one round. Maybe 3 on weekends
But will last a while if he sets a slower pace (see P)
On vacations however, after a few days of rest his stamina will increase dramatically
Have you seen this guy’s torso? Exactly
He has some stamina to spare
T = Toys (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)
Not against, although he prefers to experiment with positions that to experiment with toys
Will probably never propose any, except when he knows his partner is into such things
If you do - Victor will do his research and find something exciting for you to enjoy
U = Unfair (How much they like to tease)
He really is not patient enough for that
Doesn’t have time for it either
Why would he even want to? They’re unsatisfied = he’s unsatisfied (as I mentioned in K)
He sees no appeal in it. When he wants to fuck, he wants to fuck. No reason to beat around the bush
V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
Victor can be a bit more talkative than usual during the foreplay
Throughs some praise (a lot of it)
Tell you about his feelings (but not too much at that point)
About things that made him jealous…
A quiet Fuck may leave his lips when he enters you and when he’s about to come
In the middle of those two - he’s rather silent
Not much of a moaner
He grunts and growls a lot though. Can get a little bit loud from time
W = Wild card (A random headcanon for the character)
It was a sunny, autumn day. You were walking down the street. You’re fingers entwined. The sunlight was gracing your beautiful features so gorgeously… and he had already been yearning for so long
When you’ve finally reached the Souvenir’s door, the man is all worked up
Not that you could tell from his steely expression
But you sure got suspicious when he got all touchy feely out of the sudden
Not that you would ever mind - obviously
Feather light kisses on the nape of your neck and shoulders. Fingertips caressed your waist to then slide down to your hips. Then he reached for the hem of your dress…
“I love you…” he whispered in your ear
Goosebumps momentarily appeared on your skin as all the intense feelings he had been making you experience from the very day you saw him for the first time in his office travel down your spine in a form of a intense shiver
You wanted him. So bad. For so long.
And there was no hiding his feelings for you at that moment as you turned your head to face him
Soon after stomach was pressed against the kitchen counter. Your naked butt was all out on display for Victor to squeeze and spank as you squirmed and moaned under his touch
Victor didn’t take any unnecessary time to move his long, broad fingers down, to stroke your sensitive slit
He praised you for being so wet, so flushed, so eager for him
X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)
“I love you, too” you whispered to his ear as his arms pressed you as close to his body as possible, while you were still going back from your highs
And after that, from his lips slipped the words of the most sincere adoration… and true love
Words you would never expect to leave his beautiful, soft mouth
Matches the rest of the man
Long and thick
No curvature. Perfectly straight
Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)
Rather average
Ha has periods when he doesn’t even think about it
And he has ones when he can’t stop thinking about it
However he doesn’t go too much either way
Z = Zzz… (How quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
Remember what I said in S? Applies here as well
He’s a hardworking man
Simplu needs to work hard to keep his business growing and to keep his lover pleased
Then he just needs to get some rest. Don’t try to change his mind because he will
If he’s well rested however, he won’t let you sleep
Like, not a chance. You need to come at least five times. He doesn’t make the rules, sorry
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kpop-zone · 4 years
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Don’t Let Go | Lalisa
Roommates!au | friends to lovers | "Why are you awake so late?"
Wordcount: 1,442
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“You know you have your own bed, right? It’s exactly two steps to the right...”
You groaned when a sudden weight on top of you interrupted your process of falling asleep.
“But my mattress is really uncomfortable.”
Lisa mumbled while nestling her head against your body and wrapping your arm around her neck.
“You should really work on your excuses.”
You chuckled in amusement considering that both of you had the exact same lousy mattresses. But in the end, both of you knew that Lisa’s excuse didn’t matter anyways. It had become a habit of hers to crawl into your bed every night to bury herself in your arms. And it had become a habit of yours to complain every night while opening your arms willingly. It was a routine that both of you already knew by heart and you thanked the universe every day for sending Lisa into your life. You could have ended up with some weird roommate who walked around naked all the time or hosted some weird orgies, but instead you were paired with a girl that you considered your soulmate by now. It was truly amazing how fast the two of you had befriended each other and you hoped that you would never lose her out of sight. But when you looked down to see Lisa in your arms with a cute smile on her lips, you didn’t even believe for a second that that would happen. Contently, you sighed before closing your eyes to find your way into a deep, relaxing sleep.
You only jolted awake several hours later when your extremely annoying alarm clock caused you to flinch in shock.
“Noooo, five more minutes.”
Lisa groaned as you sat halfway up to turn off the piercing sound.
“I can’t, I have class.”
You giggled and tried to push her off, but your roommate tightly clung to your body.
“You could skip it.”
She grinned and wiggled with her eyebrows cheekily.
“No I cannot. I already missed two classes this semester, because a certain someone didn’t let go of me.”
You answered reproachfully, causing Lisa to sheepishly lower her head, because she knew fully well that you were referring to her.
“Fine, I’ll let you go.”
She sighed dramatically while plopping back down onto the mattress.
“But to make amends for leaving me here so ruthlessly, you have to promise that you’ll stay in tonight and watch movies with me?”
A pout formed on her lips and you laughed in response. She was such a baby.
“Fine- oh no, wait. I can’t, I’m sorry.”
You had really wanted to agree to Lisa’s plans when you remembered that you had already let yourself be talked into a stupid idea by some other friends.
“Why not?”
Lisa asked upset and you scratched your neck sheepishly. You didn’t know why, but you didn’t really want to tell her where you were going.
“Um...I’ll be going out tonight.”
You beat around the bush, causing Lisa to look at you in amusement.
“Ouu are you going on a date?”
She giggled jokingly, but when she noticed that you were starting to blush, her grin faltered abruptly.
“Yes.”
You mumbled, suddenly feeling guilt washing over you, although you didn’t know why. It wasn’t like you owed Lisa to stay in. You were allowed to see other people; even if you couldn’t shake the feeling that it seemed to be wrong for some reason.
“Oh...yeah that’s no problem. I hope you have fun.”
Lisa flashed you a sad smile as she jumped out of your bed and climbed into her own one where she immediately hid under her blanket. Helplessly, you stood there, fighting the urge to explain yourself. You wanted to tell her that you didn’t even want to go on the date. Seungyeon who had the same major as you had just annoyed you until you agreed to see whoever she had chosen for you. Yet, you stayed quiet. There was no logical reason why you should justify yourself. Therefore, you turned around without saying another word and got ready to begin your day even though your heavy heart begged you to crawl under the blanket with Lisa.
Sparked by that incident, your whole day was ruined. You couldn’t stop thinking about the expression on Lisa’s face after she had found out about the date and you couldn’t stop thinking about the guilt that was tugging on your heartstrings. If you were honest, you couldn’t even look less forward to that date. Still, you tried your best not to be rude; it wasn’t the girl’s fault after all that you were in this unfortunate situation. Therefore, you met up for dinner with her like you had agreed. But it was just so hard to concentrate on her words when another girl occupied your mind. You couldn’t even enjoy the movie that you decided to watch together after dinner although you had really wanted to watch it for months; just not with her. All you wanted to do was to go home. Therefore, you almost sprinted out of the cinema as soon as the movie was over, much to the confusion of your date.
“I’m really sorry, but uhm...I have a test tomorrow morning and I really need to get some studying done.”
You apologized your behavior while ushering her to the car with big steps.
She would probably never go out with you again.
But for some reason that didn’t make you upset. You were more concerned about your friendship with Lisa right now. Therefore, you ended your date rather quickly. After you had brought her to her dormitory, you almost kicked her out of your car before speeding away.
12 am, you read on the display in your car, causing you to curse silently.
Would Lisa still be awake? You knew that she had an early class tomorrow and that she tended to fall asleep rather early. In that case, you wouldn’t be able to talk to her until your afternoon classes would end tomorrow. I can’t wait that long, you thought to yourself before parking your car carelessly and running to your dorm as if your life depended on it. You really needed to make sure that everything was alright between Lisa and you.
Slightly out of breath, you eventually arrived at your front door and unlocked it silently, just in case Lisa was already asleep. But gladly a stream of light fell into the hallway as soon as you pushed open the door and when you stepped inside, you could see Lisa sitting on her bed with her gaze firmly fixed on the door. You sighed in relief before closing the door and taking off your shoes.
“Why are you awake so late?”
You asked sheepishly to break the silence, observing how Lisa fidgeted about on the bed.
“Um...I wasn’t tired.”
She mumbled almost incompressible, but the tired look in her eyes told you that she was lying.
“Really? Because it almost seems like you were waiting for me.”
You giggled and Lisa’s eyes widened.
“No! I wasn’t!”
She defended herself vehemently, causing you to chuckle. She truly was a terrible liar.
Relieved that she didn’t seem to be mad at you, you threw your jacket and purse on your desk chair before getting into Lisa’s bed. You crawled all the way up to her lap and claimed the spot yours when you roommate didn’t protest. Wordlessly, she let you lean your back against her chest and after a while, her arms even found their way around your waist. With a small smile on your lips, you savored the feeling of the familiar comfort in silence until Lisa eventually cleared her throat.
“H-how was the date?”
She asked carefully and you wondered whether that was nervousness in her voice.
“Meh I wasn’t feeling it.”
You shrugged, causing Lisa to suddenly exhale loudly as if she was relieved by your answer.
“Um...That’s a pity.”
She commented though, causing you to turn your head to be able to look at her.
“Really?”
You sounded almost disappointed, but when your eyes met, you knew that there was no need to worry. There was no sympathy in Lisa’s eyes that would support her statement, but joy instead.
“No.”
She grinned before pulling you tightly against her body, causing you to giggle.
“Movie night tomorrow?”
You asked relieved, ready to go back to where Lisa and you had left off.
“Of course, or did you think I’d let go off you after tonight.”
Lisa scoffed and you threw your head back in laughter.
No objections here.
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elpercotreviews · 3 years
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Reviewing My Anime 10/10's *Relatively* Spoiler-Free
Note: What I rank a 10/10 is very specific and obviously very subjective to my own. Something can only be a 10/10 if I already consider it a 9/10 AND I must have rewatched it. I am someone who typically does not rewatch/reread anything, unless it's something I truly absolutely enjoy. With that being said, because of the requirements, I only have 4 animes that I rank 10/10, and tbh only one of those animes would get that ranking from the general anime audience. The rest are SO SO SO specific to my particular tastes that I would be absolutely stunned if someone also had the same four as me, because the requirement is so specific. Imma make another post eventually for my 9/10's because I think that list makes a lot more sense for a general anime audience lmaooo.
Soooo, in order of least personal to most personal (although obviously they're all personal to me lol) we have:
1. Psycho-Pass
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Recommended for people who: are really into that dark dystopian future society vibes, are fans of Ghost in the Shell, like detective/crime stories
Okay, for a few people, this one actually probably makes some sense. At the moment, it has an 8.37 on myanimelist which means this anime is super well liked. I've watched this anime twice, first the original and then the second time I watched the director's cut (yes that exists lol). Overall, I'm a huge fan of the entire Psycho-Pass anime series as a whole. I've watched all three seasons, as well as two of the movies. I didn't watch any of the Sinners of the System ones cuz tbh I literally couldn't find an english sub of that anywhere, it just doesn't exist lol. I think it's okay cuz the ratings for the Sinners of the System trio of movies seems meh. I've actually watched Psycho-Pass the Movie like three/four times LMAO but that's simply cuz a movie is obviously much quicker to watch than an entire anime season. Like just objectively, the Psycho Pass series as a whole is very inconsistent in quality due to the fact that it's all original, so they do technically just make up everything as they go lol. Season two is all right (I think it gets more hate than it should), three is good but season one by far is the absolute best in the entire series. I'd argue the movie is technically my absolute favorite out of the whole IP, but I actually give the movie an 8/10. The movie, because of being obviously way shorter, simply does not have the deep controversial and philosophical lines of thought that season one has. It lacks that extra depth that would make me put it anything higher than an 8. The two main characters have good chemistry as a crime-fighting duo and the main villain's rivalry/relationship with the male lead is super compelling. The female lead is meant to be relatively naive/more on the innocent side which works with the plot as it allows the show to naturally explain and give more exposition as to the actual world and rules of Psycho-Pass without having it seem so ham-fisted or just throwing info to the audience.
2. Violet Evergarden
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Recommended for people who: cry to sad movies, like gorgeous animation, are very empathetic, like vignette-esque storytelling
All right if you even remotely consider yourself an avid anime fan, then this anime is probably also somewhere on your 10/10 list or at least an anime you consider to be "very good." That is, unless you are that very vocal minority who simply really just REALLY do not like this anime for some god forsaken reason. However, in my honest opinion, I think an anime like this just really doesn't sit well with ... how do I put this blunty ... people who do not give a fuck about other people or anyone else's feelings but their own. Basically, IF YOU ARE SELFISH, A NARCISSIST, EGOTISTICAL, OR ANY SORT OF COMBO OF THOSE THREE, YOU WILL NOT LIKE THIS ANIME. And if you do, you probably don't think you're any of those things. Because of the anime's very premise, I find it very difficult to see a very self-centered/heartless person particularly enjoying this anime. The whole premise of this anime is that the main character who, because of her upbringing, doesn't understand feelings/emotions, especially the concept of love, grows as a human and slowly begins to learn what love is. The show does this by showing multiple sets of characters meant to represent different types of love (romantic, familial, platonic, etc). The vocal minority of people I've seen give Violet Evergarden bad ratings all typically argue that although beautiful, the anime doesn't have any substance/doesn't really mean anything. If that's honestly all you got after watching the entire show, then you deadass just don't get it, and you probably will never ever get it. If you've seen or heard of Vivy: Fluorite Eye's Song, than just know that these two animes are VERY very similar in vibe despite being technically different genres. However, I personally found the themes and concepts in Vivy are done much more masterfully in Violet Evergarden which I think is due to Vivy's heavier focus on a story-driven overarching plot/action as opposed to Violet Evergarden's focus more on emotional impact/an episodic format. I've watched the entire series and I've rewatched the main show twice. TBH you can probably skip the gaiden movie AKA the one set at the girl's academy it was highkey pointless. Compared to the opera episode they added as a "special", the gaiden movie was still good but I wish resources were dedicated to something that actually added to the story. ALSO YES I KNOW ITS A GAIDEN AKA A SIDE STORY AKA FILLER SO YES NO DUH IT DIDNT ADD ANYTHING, BUT STILL. As for the main show, I think I cried for three episodes (the one about the playwright/author I forgot lol, the mother and daughter, and the soldier). On my rewatch, I didn't cry but I still deeply cared for and related to the characters. Violet Evergarden is a beautiful anime with a beautiful story.
3. ACCA: 13-ku Kansatsu Ka
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Recommended for people who: like bread and bakeries, don't mind a very chill and slow-paced story, like stories about political intrigue and hidden agendas
Based on a relatively short manga, ACCA: 13 follows the main character Jean Otus as he performs his job of auditing the 13 districts of his country Dowa, while rumors and politics brew in the background that threaten to entangle Jean into a complicated plot. To be honest, I think properly reviewing this anime is impossible for me, because I just can't really explain the vibes of this anime besides "chill" and "intriguing." I think trying to explain anything more than the basic premise I just wrote would spoil a lot of what ACCA is, because it's plot is actually relatively quite simple and straightforward. Compared to Psycho-Pass which has a relatively good cult following, and Violet Evergarden which is universally praised, ACCA is an anime that I've yet to personally meet anyone who has ever even heard of it LMAOO. And almost everyone I know watches anime, so that's saying something oof. ACCA is made by Madhouse, which if you don't know, is a super well known anime studio, producing big hits such as Death Note, Hunter x Hunter, One Punch Man, etc. That's why I'm surprised that ACCA has flown just SO under the radar, but that may be due to the overalls nature of the anime itself. ACCA is an anime where all the characters hold their card close and no one seems to really share their real thoughts. One main criticism the anime has is the lack of deeper connections to characters and that for a main character, Jean Otus is very bland. To be honest, I think that's a very fair criticism and I can understand why this would prevent people from rating this anime higher than an 8 or 7. Due to the very nature of the anime and its plot, I do agree that there is a huge cast of colorful characters that we unfortunately don't really get to know more about. To be honest though, I don't mind this because I feel that's honestly quite realistic, especially factoring in Jean's job. All these places he's going and all these people he's meeting, it's literally just his job. He's not on vacation, these people aren't his friends, so the anime has no real reason to dwell much longer on places past its specific episode. Just like in real life, you encounter so many people and go past so many places that you probably won't ever see again. So for me personally, I didn't mind that the anime didn't explicitly show much about the backstories or lives of the cast, save for the very main characters (as their backstories were plot relevant). I think as viewers of not simply an anime, but a whole other world, I think it should be satisfactory to inherently understand that these are whole "people" who have entire lives that we are not exactly privy to. So although admittedly our understanding of many of the characters was all around quite shallow, I think that works for the scope of the anime, which was relatively simple and focused on just Jean living his life and the political plot stirring in the background until it was brought forward in the second half of the anime. Also I love Jean Otus. I actually completely absolutely adore him. He is literally my profile pic for myanimelist LMAO. I think calling him "bland" is fair from other people's perspectives, especially as the supposed main character of an ANIME, but I feel that if ACCA was in a different format like a novel, I think his personality would have been less criticized. Like I said, I love him soo much. I don't find him bland at all, but actually very interesting and highkey attractive LOL (if only he'd quit smoking but it's part of his charm 😞). Yes for an anime "protagonist," he is quite underwhelming especially compared to others, but I think that makes him very charming!!! Like all he wants to do is just chill, vibe, and do his job lmaooo. I think as a person, he’s very charismatic, and in the world of ACCA the rest of the characters see that as well. Because like, if he really were such a bland person, why would so many people like him and actually trust him lol? As for why it’s technically my favorite anime of all time (my ultimate one is a movie), I can’t give super detailed reasons why to be honest. I just really like the overall vibes of the anime itself, and I think the anime is just super unique and original. I’ve watched a ton of anime over the years, but I’ve genuinely seen nothing like ACCA in the slightest. I mean, just look at the recommended animes on the myanimelist. The recommended animes are all stuff I’ve also personally really liked (like fugou keiji unlimited and the great pretender) but yeah there’s just truly nothing that’s close to what ACCA is, and because of that, it reminds my absolute favorite anime show. I’ve seen the dub and the sub, even though I am a vehement dub hater lmaooo (except for very few circumstances, and this also applies to all non-English media, not just anime). There was only one thing in the entire show that slightly confused me/ seemed slightly unbelievable and I won’t spoil but it had something to do with the overall timeline of some events, but it doesn’t detract from the story at all. Oh and the art style! I really love the art style of the anime. It stays pretty true to the manga, but is also just an overall kind of art style I really like. I really enjoy the more like 2d/flat/drawn art style versus really clean and really detailed stuff, and I’m typically not a big fan of very obvious use of CGI (unless done tastefully like in Demon Slayer). All the backgrounds in ACCA have this painted/drawn style and the anime itself has this like muted(?) filter over it that makes the anime seem like someone’s drawings just put up on display in a way that’s really refreshing and nice. I highly recommend this story for anyone who wants a breath of fresh air and to get away from the typical action-packed high energy of big name anime.
4. From Up on Poppy Hill
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Imma make a whole separate post JUST for this movie so I can explain why I love this movie so so much. And honestly, Imma need a whole separate post in the first place to address the elephant in the room when it comes to this movie (if you’ve seen it, then you know what I’m talking about). And if you’ve haven’t seen the movie, maybe you’ve heard about one of its controversial themes. I’m not gonna say what it is, cuz I KNOW it’ll be super off-putting for a lot of people, but please omg just hear me out. I just love this movie so so much. I’ve seen it like 7 times and counting. I have it downloaded on my computer and on a flash drive. I’ve watched the sub AND the dub however I’ve stopped watching the dub because it makes me sad every time I hear Shun’s voice actor ;-; This movie is legit an honest-to-god comfort movie for me that I could watch over and over and I’ll fall in love with it again each and every time. And once again IMMA MAKE A WHOLE SEPARATE POST BECAUSE I SWEAR PEOPLE ARE GONNA BE LIKE “Yo ain’t this the movie with the -----” and it’s like PLEASE LET ME EXPLAIN. The vibes of this movie, the themes it addresses (yes even THAT theme), the music, the art, the characters, is perfectly presented in a way that I will never stop watching this movie. The only other film that has come close to the amount of times I’ve watched From Up on Poppy Hill would be Legally Blonde lmaooooo. 
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cutelittlestar · 4 years
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Steal My Girl || Peter Parker x Reader {Smut!}
Summary: While on a trip, Peter plans to confess his feelings to you but everything is ruined by a boy who also has his eyes on you. Once Peter finally unveils the truth, things get steamy... 
Word Count: 5.7k
Warning(s): fem!reader, fluff, slight angst, SMUT, language, MATURE CONTENT, 18+ (you & Peter are 18)
A/N: lordtt.....plz forgive me, for I have sinned. This has been secretly written in my notebook for quite some time, and I was always too scared to post it online. Now, I say fuck it. As always, I love you all and I hope you enjoy!!!😘💕❤️ 
For those of you who may be wondering about my other series, Maniac and Lone Wolf, it may be a while bc of college and work (being an adult SUCKS). But, I promise I’ll try and upload the chapters whenever I can! 
*gif is not mine!
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Once again, Midtown’s decathlon team was given another opportunity to travel to a different state for a tournament, where they would compete with other high schools for the national title. Peter was extremely excited because this was your first trip with the team, and he wanted you to have an unforgettable experience; that’s why Peter created a meticulous yet worthy plan that would help him accomplish his goal. His plan consisted of various things, such as taking you to popular locations, exploring the city late at night -despite curfew- and doing spontaneous activities he knew you would love. Most importantly, Peter made this plan in hopes that he could confess his feelings for you. He’s had a crush on you since freshman year, but he was always terrified to tell you the truth. Now that senior year was almost over, the pain of withholding his raw emotions was too unbearable to handle. It’s now or never, Peter thought to himself, and for a while, Peter believed his plan was going to work. 
But, he was wrong. 
Peter’s plan began to crumble the minute that Daniel Miller entered the picture. Daniel was everything that Peter wasn’t - he was perfect, a star-athlete, tall,  and he had an impeccable character that made him lovable. Every girl had a huge crush on him, and they had every right to find him appealing. In the beginning, Peter didn’t really seem to care about Daniel, but now that Daniel was purposefully sabotaging Peter’s plan, Peter was beyond angry. Anytime that Peter was with you, you were whisked away by Daniel for various idiotic reasons. 
The first time Daniel took you away, he lied and asked if you could switch seats with Flash because he was ‘severely’ allergic to peanut butter crackers. You, of course, offered to change seats, completely unaware that Daniel was luring you towards him. Peter felt his blood boil; he clearly remembers seeing Daniel eat a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup a couple of days before. The second time Daniel took you away, you were sitting next to Peter in the dining hall at the hotel before Daniel ‘accidentally’ spilled hot coffee all over his body; once again, you fell for his trap, and you offered to help him, despite Daniel being eighteen years old. The third time Daniel took you away, you were watching a movie with Peter; Daniel somehow convinced you that he needed your help and asked if you could quiz him for the upcoming competition, to which you agreed. Every single time that Daniel succeeded, he would give Peter a relish sneer, mentally gloating that he had successfully stolen you away. 
Although Peter absolutely hated Daniel with every fiber of his soul, It’s not like Peter was going to force you to stop talking to Daniel - that would be a dick move - but if Peter had the chance to throw Daniel off a building, he would happily do it in a heartbeat. However, as you were spending more time with Daniel instead of Peter, Peter’s hope was gradually disappearing. 
Now, Peter morosely sat in his hotel room alone, imagining Daniel constantly flirting with you the whole afternoon and evening. By making up a quick lie and telling Mr. Harrington that he had a stomach ache, Peter was able to sulk in his room while the rest of the group was exploring tourist areas in the city before the big competition. Peter had come to believe that Daniel had won and decided there was no point of trying to win you back; there was no way that you would ever love him, Peter thought to himself, not when Daniel is still around.
Meanwhile, as Peter was sadly believing that Daniel was now professing his love for you, you were sitting on your bed, your room right in front of Peter’s door, completely unaware that Peter stayed behind as well. You, too, lied and said that you were feeling sick, but in reality, you wanted some time away from Daniel. He was becoming extremely annoying, but you didn’t have the heart to tell him the truth. While you assumed that you were going to have some peace and quiet, that dream was utterly destroyed. As usual, Flash opened his big mouth and told Daniel that you were in your hotel room, so now, you were sitting inches away from Daniel as a movie was playing in the background. You pretended to listen to the movie, but you constantly thought about Peter, wondering how he was doing. You felt horrible for leaving Peter alone so many times, and you wanted to apologize but you never had the chance to. 
“You okay, Y/N?” Daniel confronted, noticing how your eyes were not watching the screen. You rapidly blinked, turning to look at Daniel before giving him a half-hearted smile. 
“‘M fine, just thinking about Peter,” you honestly confessed, hoping that Daniel would further question you, wondering why you were so worried about Peter. Instead, he said the exact opposite. 
“Meh, don’t worry about Parker right now. It’s just you and me, pretty girl.” You let out a frustrated sigh, to which Daniel didn’t pick up, and you mentally rolled your eyes, hating how Daniel always changed the topic whenever you would bring up Peter. If you knew that Daniel had this fuckboy persona, you never would’ve given him the time of day. You remained quiet and glued your eyes to the screen, hoping that Daniel wouldn’t notice your disinterest in the horrible movie he picked out. You faked a laugh as something ‘hilarious’ showed up on the screen, but then you felt your phone vibrate on the nightstand. You leaned towards the furniture, detaching your phone from the charger and unlocking your phone. MJ sent you a text; you assumed she sent you a photo of where they were at, but when you read the message, a frown settled on your face. 
Peter is in his room right now, very upset. Do you think you could check up on him? 
Without needing any more information, you turned off your phone and jumped out of the bed. You turned to look at Daniel, who paused the movie, and you gave him an apologetic look, hoping that he would understand what you were about to tell him. 
“I’m sorry, Danny, but I just got a text from MJ. Peter is upset and I have to make sure he’s okay.” 
“What?” Daniel responded in an annoying tone, hating that Peter, once again, was ruining his plans. “Are you serious right now? We’re watching a movie, you can’t just leave me here.” 
You glared at Daniel, deeply despising the way he spoke to you, but you bit your lip, not wanting to argue back and forth. You slipped on your shoes and proceeded to ignore Daniel’s snarky attitude. 
‘Daniel, I don’t get why you’re so mad. I’m checking up on one of my closest friends, what’s your fucking deal?” you snapped at him, causing Daniel to lean back in shock. 
“My deal?” Daniel angrily repeated. “My deal is that you’re paying too much attention to him. We’re having a great time together, I just hate that Peter is getting in the way of that.” 
You rolled your eyes, unable to believe that Daniel actually thought you were having a great time. The boy merely spoke about himself and nothing else, and you found him extremely boring. You let out a laugh, to which he didn’t like, but you didn’t give a fuck anymore. “Danny,” you started, “don’t try to control what I do. I’m leaving and that’s final.” 
You angrily grabbed your phone, ignoring his protests and pleads, but just as you were about to open the door, the idiot had the nerve to open his mouth once again. 
“Whatever, go run to Peter. But, I promise you this, he can’t show you a good time like how I can.” 
You remained still, feeling your blood boil due to his vulgar comment. You were trying your hardest not to chuck your phone at his face, but instead, you turned around and gave him a smirk.
“I doubt that, Danny. From what I heard, you barely have four inches,” you retorted before opening the door and slamming it shut. 
You mumbled curse words under your breath, wishing you could’ve smacked Daniel across the face, but Peter was your top priority. In a quick second, you were now standing in front of Peter’s door, and you anxiously knocked on it. Peter was pulled out of his thoughts once he heard someone knocking, and he got up off of his bed and walked towards the door, opening it halfway. To say the least, Peter was surprised to see you standing right in front of him, and he wondered why you were back so early. Judging by your irritated face, Peter knew something was on your mind and you wanted to get it off of your chest, so he moved to the side and fully opened the door. You walked inside, continuing to spew out profanities, but then you closed your mouth, remembering why you were here.
“Peter, is something bothering you? MJ told me you were upset,” you said, causing Peter to stiffen. Peter hoped that MJ didn’t tell you the real reason he was upset, but he remained quiet, wanting you to continue speaking. You walked towards the bed and plopped down, patting the empty spot next to you, signaling Peter to sit down. Peter obeyed, and you instantly leaned into him, laying your head on his shoulder. 
“You can tell me anything, Peter. I’ll listen,” you remarked, hoping that Peter would tell you the truth. You hated seeing him sad, and you were willing to do anything to make him happy. Peter let out a big breath, slowly working up the courage to say what’s been on his chest for the past four years. You lifted your head, shifting your body so that you were now fully facing him. You watched as a shaky Peter was fidgeting with his fingers. 
“You want me to be completely honest?” Peter timidly whispered, deciding that now was finally the time to say he’s had a crush on you since the moment he laid eyes on you. You nodded your head, eager to know the cause of his sorrows.
“Yes, of course, Pete,” you replied, getting anxious by the second as Peter was stalling time. Peter bit his lower lip, not knowing how to perfectly form his emotions into words, but when he opened his mouth, everything came spewing out. 
“I’ve been in love with you since the day I saw you, and I made this very tedious plan to confess my feelings for you while we were on this trip - but then fucking Daniel ruined everything - and that’s the reason why I’ve been so moody. I was going to take you to various places in the city - and I even bought you a bracelet with our initials on it - but now that I’m saying it out loud, that’s kinda creepy and I’m sorry, and I’m rapidly speaking so I can run away from the inevitable - which is you turning me down because you don’t feel the same way.” Peter heavily panted as he finished his rant, but there was a long moment of silence as you stared at Peter with wide eyes. 
“No fucking way,” you breathed out, unable to register what Peter was saying. All of this time, you thought that Peter didn’t like you, but when he finally admitted his feelings, you were completely taken aback. Holy fuck, you thought to yourself, Peter loves me. Peter loves me.  
“I know, I know-,” Peter sorrowfully replied, rubbing his forehead, hurt that you were ridiculing him because of the way he felt about you. “It’s hilarious that a guy like me thinks that he can get with a girl like you. Hahaha, but it hurts, Y/N, I have feelings an-”
“Peter,” you interrupted him, moving closer until you were inches away from his face. Peter closed his mouth, feeling his heart rapidly beat in his chest as he began to cherish every feature on your face; his heart felt like it was going to explode due to the lack of distance, but you didn’t seem to mind. In fact, you loved the effect you were having on Peter. You delicately placed your hands on his chest, and you discreetly remained calm, despite you being able to feel how strong his chest was.
“I love you, too” you heartedly declared, anxiously smiling as you waited for Peter to respond. You watched the corner of his lips curve upwards, and you lovingly stared into Peter’s eyes, noticing the crinkles around his eyes become more prominent when he grinned, and you absolutely adored it. He was like a ray of sunshine, his smile was more than his mouth; it was his voice and his words, and it was utterly beautiful. 
His eyes briefly widened, but then they became soft as he now watched your cheeks turn pink like a spring tulip. 
“Are you like, serious? You’re not messing with me right now?” Peter managed to say, unable to accept that the girl of his dreams just told him she liked him. You let out a slight chuckle, running your hands up until they peacefully rested on Peter’s neck; you slowly leaned your forehead against his, deeply staring into his eyes.
“I’m a hundred percent serious, Peter. I love you so fucking much.” You drew Peter towards you as much as you could, and in the first second, he inhaled your enticing scent. It smelled pleasant, light, and refreshing - there was a slight hint of fruitiness, but it wasn’t overbearing nor masking your natural scent. The next second, your lips are on Peter’s, and he openly invites you into his arms. For such a long time, Peter kisses you with such delicately and tenderness, and you didn’t want to pull away. This felt right, and you knew that Peter felt the same way. Peter was your perfect guy, and you were going to make sure he knew that every single day of his life until the day he dies. 
Peter departs his lips from yours, despite you moaning for more, and he takes a moment to lovingly stares into your eyes, gingerly holding your face in his hands. Your eyes sparkled with delight, and if Peter could, he would freeze this moment forever, never wanting to move forward. Although Peter’s plans didn’t go the way he wanted it to, the outcome was, nonetheless, just as beautiful as he imagined it. 
“Kiss me again, Peter,” you quietly demanded. 
Peter leans into your touch, finding your lips once again - but then something inside of you changes. The soft tender kiss turned into a vicious, needy make-out session. The sweet, timid, and friendly girl Peter used to know was completely gone and was now replaced with a rough and aroused one. You gradually climbed onto Peter’s lap as you hungrily kissed him, and you feel a patch of wetness drip onto your underwear as your tongues fight for dominance. Peter is so enticed on kissing you that he fails to notice one of your hands firmly grasping his cock through his pants. The sudden touch causes Peter to ripple out a low groan, and you smile into the kiss, content that you were able to make Peter wither from just a single touch. 
You repeat the same noise at a higher pitch as Peter roughly rubs your ass, disconnecting his lips before attacking your neck. You throw your head back in utter bliss, granting Peter more access, and you feel a bruise form as Peter continues to suck on a particular spot. While one hand is stroking Peter’s enormous cock, the other hand snakes its way under his shirt; another moan comes out of Peter’s mouth, and you loved hearing it. 
In a blink of an eye, Peter’s shirt is on the ground, and yours follows as well. You push him down against the bed, and you seductively crawl towards him until you’re straddling his waist. 
Your lips reconnect once more, and Peter’s fingers manage to unclasp your bra, which he recklessly tosses to the ground. “Peter,” you moaned in delight as his hands raked over your exposed chest, firmly gripping your breasts. Just as Peter is about to place his lips on your sensitive bud, a loud banging on the door prevents him from doing so. You let out a gasp, frightened at the sound, but then you hear the voice yell. 
“Open up, Parker!” Daniel angrily announced, continuing to slam his fist on the door. “I know Y/N is in there! We need to talk.” You and Peter stare at each other, not knowing what to do, but then you vividly remembered Daniel’s words. I promise you this, he can’t show you a good time like how I can. A smirk grows on your face as you think of an elaborate and mischievous plan. Oh, you were going to prove him wrong. As Daniel kept screaming, demanding you to come out of the room, Peter became exasperated, completely annoyed that Daniel was ruining your intimate moment. Finally, Peter lets out an irritated groan, but just as he’s about to move you to the side so he can answer the door, you place your hands on his chest. 
“Don’t move, I have an idea,” you say with a sly smug, but before Peter can ask you what your plan was, you let out a loud, compelling, and pornographic moan.
“Oh, God! Peter!” you yelled in pure ecstasy, grabbing your breasts in the process to keep you riled up. “Don’t stop! Keep going, baby.” The banging immediately stops, and you mentally give yourself a pat on the back, knowing that on the other side of the door, Daniel was extremely jealous, embarrassed, and frustrated. Peter’s eyes widen in shock at your reaction, but he’s ultimately aroused once more, loving how you wanted Daniel to know that he was fulfilling your sexual desires. 
Peter disregards Daniel’s presence and attaches his lips on your nipple, causing you to loudly sigh in bliss as Peter sucks on it. The fake moans you were forming were now real, and you held Peter’s head in your chest as his finger roughly rubbed the other nipple. 
“Fuck-” you loudly whined, unintentionally rubbing yourself on Peter’s crotch. A hefty groan comes out of Peter, and he detaches his lips from your breasts, easily lifting you up with one hand while the other begins to undo his pants. You mirror his actions, doing the same to your pants, tossing your bottoms and underwear to the floor. Peter wiggled out of his pants and boxers, his cocks twitching and springing up as your exposed core slowly rubbed itself on his shaft. You can already see the pre-cum forming at the head, and you eagerly lick your lips, wanting to wrap your mouth around his member. 
Suddenly, Peter grabs you by the waist and flips you over so that he’s on top. As you expect him to unleash all of his strength onto you, Peter delicately kisses you, as if he’s afraid he’ll break you. While his touches send shivers down your spine, melting your heart, you’re impatient, wanting more. You softly push him away, and for a moment, Peter thinks he’s done something wrong. 
“What is it? Did I do something wrong?” Peter anxiously asked, scanning your face to see if he could detect what was bothering you. You bit your lip in anticipation, petrified that if you said what was on your mind, it would ruin the mood. A million reasons swirled around his mind and he feared that he’s gone too far; he assumed you didn’t feel comfortable anymore to continue your sexual activities. What Peter failed to realize was that you didn’t regret anything. “Tell me, baby,” Peter reassured you, placing light kisses on your face and neck. You cave into his touch, and you feel your muscles relax.  
“I want you,” you started off, raking your fingers across his chest. “But, I need rough sex, Peter,” you needily whimpered, biting your lip in the process, causing Peter to lean back, his eyes widening. “Please, fuck me as hard as you can. I want Daniel to know how good you’re fucking me.”
You intently stare at Peter’s face, scared that he was going to say no, but then you notice his pupils dilate, his eyes darkening as he listened to your words. The mere mention of Daniel’s name caused Peter to shake from rage, but then something switched inside of Peter, and a huge grin spread across his face. 
“Damn Y/N,” Peter replies, biting his lower lip. A small moan escapes Peter’s mouth as he realizes what you’re asking of him, and he absolutely loves it; Peter feels his cock twitch from excitement as he repeated your words over and over again in his mind, and it drove him insane. Peter couldn’t believe it; here he was, thinking you were going to be an innocent girl, but oh no - he was wrong, and boy did he love it. Peter bit his lip in hunger, his eyes taking in your body once more. The thought of mercilessly pounding into you without anything stopping him caused more pre-cum to leak out of his cock, and Peter was more than prepared to grant you what so deeply desired.
“As you wish, darling.” Peter peppered kisses against the nape of your neck and before you know it, Peter firmly grabs you by the neck. You let out a soft gasp at his sudden change of behavior, but then a whimper escapes out of you as Peter crashes his lips onto yours, and you allow him to take full control. 
“Fuck Peter.” You moan as you buck your hips up, needing him to be inside of you. You were becoming impatient, but Peter darkly chuckled as he brought his face close to yours.
“Oh no baby,” he scolds, a smirk forming on his face. “I’ll be inside you when I want to. You understand?” You feel as if you’re about to cry out in pain and pleasure, but you’re willing to do anything for Peter. You frantically nod your head, hoping it will satisfy Peter. 
Peter’s grip got tighter, unhappy that you didn’t verbally respond. “You better speak right now or I swear, I’ll tease you until you’re a crying mess.” 
“Yes, Peter. I understand, baby,” you affirmed as Peter hummed in satisfaction. Peter slowly released the tight grip he had before rummaging through the nightstand. Peter pulls out a condom but before you even have time to ask him where he got it, he tears it open with his mouth and puts on the safety. Without any warning or hesitation, Peter roughly turns you around, your chest pressed down against the bed. You immediately understand what he wants, and you quickly get on all fours, laying your head on the pillow and perking your ass up, giving Peter a complete view of your core. Peter groans at the sight as you flirtatiously wiggle your bare ass in front of him, and he leans back to admire the view for a short moment. 
“Look at you,” he seductively whispered, causing you to become even more aroused as his words drip out of his mouth like sweet honey. “All ready for me, such a good girl.” 
Suddenly, Peter slams into you, and you let out the loudest noise you’ve ever made, finally satisfied that he was inside you. However, Peter doesn’t move, allowing you to adjust to his large size, but you cry out in frustration, wanting him to pound into you mercilessly. You attempt to move, but Peter roughly grabs your hips, refraining you. Peter lets out a heavy exhalation, absolutely melting into you as he felt your pretty folds swallow him up. It was majestic. 
“Shit,” Peter mutters, “You’re so tight, Y/N.” Peter slowly begins to move, but in an instant, his pace starts to accelerate. Peter pounds into your cunt; it was ruthless, exhilarating, and animalistic, and you rolled your eyes in utter pleasure, your mouth hanging open.
You’re a writhing mess, spelling out incoherent words as Peter tightly held onto your waist and slammed into you. You knew there was going to be bruises due to his death grip, but the feeling of his cock sliding in and out of you made you totally forget. The slight pain was gone as pleasure overstimulated your body, and you arched your back in response, repeating Peter’s name. You clamped onto the sheets for dear life, your head laying on the pillows, your sounds being muffled. The sound of skin slapping echoed around the room, and Peter gasps and curses, becoming a panting mess as he doesn’t intend on stopping anytime soon.
Peter grabs a handful of your hair, forcing your head off the pillow, and your moans become louder. “That’s right,” Peter reassured, releasing your hair and moving his hand towards your neck. “Scream for me, baby. Let him know who’s fucking you this good.”
“Ah, Peter! Faster, please! Ohh fuck Peter, shit!“ you scream, holding onto his arm for support. 
“Can Daniel fuck you like this?” Peter asked, digging his knees deeper into the bed and moving his hips at a faster rate. Peter’s cock was stretching you out, and you were loving every minute of it. 
“No! Peter -Shit!- only you can! Only you can make me feel like this.” You cry out in pleasure, your hair sticking to your sweaty back and chest. Peter groans in satisfaction, your words encouraging him to move faster.
“Exactly, you’re fucking mine - all mine.” Your walls contract around him at his words, and Peter feels a familiar feeling growing in the pit of his stomach. He detaches himself from you, pulling out for a brief moment before forcing you to lay on your back. Peter’s hand gingerly returns to your waist, savoring this moment. Both of you heavily pant as you stare into each other’s eyes, and Peter leans in, passionately kissing you.
“Shit Peter!” you squeal in shock as you feel his cock enter you without hesitation, your nails clutching onto his contracting muscles. 
“Whose pussy is this?” Peter grunted, fully slamming his cock into your pussy. A high pitch scream comes out of your mouth but you’re unable to form coherent words, completely discombobulated. Peter’s cock perfectly fills you up, and you desperately stare into his eyes, digging your sharp nails in his back. “I said,” Peter angrily repeated, tightly squeezing your neck. “Whose pussy is this?” 
“Yours,” you mewl as you began to feel a knot form in your stomach. 
“That’s right, baby,” Peter asserted, sweat trickling down his face, chest, and back. You closed your eyes, completely aroused by Peter’s rough side, and Peter couldn’t help but trace over your body. He admired the way your breasts bounced as he pounded into you, the way your face contorted in total ecstasy, and the way your hair was a mess - a mess that he made from fucking you so good. 
“I’m so close, baby -Fuck I’m s-so close-“ You feel the knot get stronger. Peter continues to thrust into you, watching as your eyes roll to the back of your head. Peter’s fingers find its way to your clit, rapidly rubbing circles, and you let out a whine. 
“Come for me, darling. Come all over my cock,” Peter coaxed you, his words sending you over the edge. Your hands grip onto his arms for dear life as you let out a throat-ripping moan, your body shaking in the process. Peter comes right after you, his hands resting beside your head, firmly clutching onto the sheets as he, too, let out a groan. Peter’s body collapses onto yours, and your fingers find its way to the curls at the back of his head, burying themselves in his smooth hair. For a while, the room goes silent, and all you can hear are the heavy pants coming out of your mouths. Peter is still inside you, but you don’t mind at all. Peter’s body slowly rises and falls as he comes down from his high, and his hands cradle your face; Peter leaves a sloppy yet passionate kiss, and once again, you melt into his arms. 
You whimper as you feel Peter’s member pull out, and you watch as Peter wobbly stands up to throw away the condom. You intently stare at his chest as he walks back to you, and you notice the fresh scratch marks you left. You feel your cheeks turn red, but Peter gives you a soft smile, mentally telling you that it was fine. Finally, Peter gets back into bed and pulls the covers over your bodies. Your turn to lay on his side, lovingly gazing into his eyes. 
“Wow,” was all you managed to say, “That was fucking amazing.” Peter lets out a chuckle, becoming flustered as you continued to praise him. 
“Do you think Daniel heard?” you wondered, softly rubbing Peter’s chest. 
“I think the whole floor heard,” Peter truthfully responded, scratching the back of his head. You lightly laugh at his comment, your eyes glistening with joy, before pressing a tender kiss on Peter’s lips. Good, you thought to yourself, now everyone knows how great Peter is at sex. 
“Are you okay?” Peter asked. “Did I hurt you?” Your heart melted in your chest as you realized how worried Peter was. You shook your head, easing him. “I’m fine, Peter.” However, the dryness of your throat made it hard for you to speak, and Peter knew that you needed something to drink. 
“Let’s get you something to drink, there’s a vending machine right out the door,” Peter offered, to which you accepted. You were desperately craving water, but you also fancied a small snack to munch on. Peter and you got out of bed -despite how sore your bodies were - and you instinctively bent down and grabbed your underwear and Peter’s shirt. Peter felt an enormous grin grow on his face as he watched you, and you returned the smile when you felt his eyes on you. 
You walked towards the door with nothing but his shirt and underwear whereas Peter was only wearing his boxer shorts; just as you opened the door and stepped out of the room, with Peter right behind you, your eyes landed on Daniel, who, as well, opened your hotel door the exact moment you did. Daniel tightly clutched his book bag, but as he turned around to head down the hallway, his eyes found yours. He deeply stared, noticing how your makeup was smeared, your hair was tangled, and Peter’s chest was covered with scratches and bruises. 
You broke eye-contact, your face expressionless, as you turned to the left, heading towards the vending machine that was feet away from where you stood. 
Peter bitterly glared down Daniel, but then Peter mirrored your movements, leaning against the machine. Peter took notice of how Daniel was glued to the floor, and Peter flared his nostrils, disliking how Daniel continued to gawk at you. 
Yet, Peter didn’t mind that you were only wearing his t-shirt in the middle of the hallway. He knew Daniel had a perfect view of your ass, which was barely covered by the thin fabric, but Peter didn’t care because he knew that the moment you entered his hotel room, he was going to relentlessly fuck you again until you couldn’t walk anymore. As you were still deciding what snack to choose from, Peter slightly turned his head to the side, a smug expression cemented on his face as he watched Daniel awkwardly stand in front of your door. Daniel’s face was bright red, most likely due to his rage of knowing what you and Peter were doing, but Peter remained unbothered, rejoicing that he was able to rile up Daniel with so much ease. 
Peter sent a coy wink to Daniel as he wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you into his arms and placing sloppy kisses on your exposed neck while still holding eye-contact with Daniel. You leaned your head back, exposing more skin for Peter, knowing fully well of what he was trying to do. However, you didn’t object at all. A pool of your wetness started to drip onto your underwear, and you softly let out a discreet moan as Peter’s hand tightly clutched your ass. You loved how Peter was gloating to Daniel, reveling in the fact that you were Peter’s and only his. Your lips curved upwards as you heard Daniel let out a huff of frustration, mumbling incoherent words as he stormed down the hallway.  
Once Daniel was gone, you wrapped your arms around Peter’s neck, your fingers delicately playing with the strands of his hair as a giggle escaped from your lips. You placed a soft kiss on his lips before pulling away.
“You’re such an ass,” you joked, shaking your head as you divert your attention back to the vending machine. Peter shrugged his shoulders, not caring that Daniel was probably going to cry in his room, knowing you slipped away from his fingers. “Asshole deserves it,” Peter blankly declared. You bit your lip in frustration, your eyes glancing at the snacks before Peter rested his head on your shoulder, wrapping his arms around your waist once again.
“C’mon baby,” Peter seductively whispered. His hands discreetly snuck underneath your shirt and his fingers started to play your nipples, slowing pitching them in the process. You let out a soft gasp, shocked that Peter had the courage to do this in the hallway, but then you felt yourself become aroused, ready to start round two. “We still have a few hours before everyone comes back,” Peter murmured, biting your earlobe in the process.
You let out a big sigh. “Screw it,” you said, quickly forgetting about the snack and grabbing Peter’s hand. Peter bit his lip, a devious smirk forming on his lips as you dragged him back to the room, eager to continue your previous activity. 
Despite Peter’s plan not going accordingly, he was’t complaining. To say the least, Peter was fully satisfied, especially after the several rounds he had with you. 
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logically-asexual · 3 years
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okay i'm already procrastinating and i don't plan on sleeping any time soon so here we go.
☆ ✩ my personal ranking for every season 1 Sanders Sides episode. ✩ ☆
i think it's going to be pretty similar to @dukeofonions' but let's see if i find something new to contribute haha. i see you didn't include that one about Patton in the Big Game or whatever, so i'm not including it either xd. also i think i'm going to count Accepting Anxiety as one episode only.
edit: i finished and now i dare you to drink a shot of water every time i say the word spanish or a version of the word comfort and become very well hydrated.
#16 I'm in a Disney Show
(i agree with dukeofonions here) i always forget this episode exists. it was ok in terms of being happy for real life Thomas but as a Sanders Sides episode it didn't do anything. the sides were just giving their opinions but it wasn't very funny or interesting. also i'm bitter because it made me look up the episode he was in and i didn't like it at all. i don't know if i'm too old for those Disney shows now but Thomas was literally the only good part of it, everything else was really dull and boring imo. a waste of time.
however, Logan supporting clickbait is one of the funniest things ever, and i'll never forget it.
#15 Becoming A Cartoon
i didn't hate this episode but it was just .. meh.. you know? several factors contribute to this. one, i couldn't feel much nostalgia for Butch Hartman's shows because i watched them in Spanish, and everything feels really weird when they speak English, i don't like how my old cartoons sound in English. two, it was disappointing to me because we were all desperately waiting for Plot™ and instead they give us this short episode about nothing (oh how the tables have turned now it's the other way around haha). and three, i didn't like the style of the animation :/ their faces and expressions freaked me out, Roman's douchey face still haunts me.
#14 Way Too Adult
here i'm biased because i don't like Patton much, and i didn't back when i watched the series the first time either, so this video was a little disappointingwithout the rest. also it wasn't relatable to me because i am still too young and dependent on my parents haha. but Patton is funny and it's funny to laugh at Thomas' struggling.
#13 The Dark Side of Disney
i've never been a fan of Disney movies. i actually never watched Mulan or the Lion King or Aladdin as a kid, so meh. i liked the ending, though, it was cool to see Virgil have fun and be right for once. it does make me a bit uncomfortable because the way Thomas tries too hard with Virgil's mouth movements and his low voice reminds me of a guy that had made me v uncomfortable not long before watching that video. so an icky feel overall.
#12 A New Year of Lying to Myself
this video was actually kind of fogettable to me. i had a hard time connecting the voices in the song to the characters and idk. i don't love it nor hate it, just .. neutral.
#11 My True Identity
pretty much the same opinion as dukeofonions, again. it's a good introduction and it's good that it was the beginning of it all but on its own it's not very special. i think it's awesome on Thomas to have come up with such a clever idea, like choosing the dad, the teacher and the prince and putting them together and match them with thoughts?? that fit so perfectly?? it really is just very impressive when you think about it, that it was just a random idea he had for a short 5 minute video.
#10 Taking on Anxiety
i liked this video a lot because when i watched it i had recently been a lot on tumblr, and found out through relatable posts that i had anxiety. so watching this video was really fun and it made me happy to feel so seen, specially the intro when Thomas just talks about what it's like to have Anxiety and Virgil is so smug about it.
- ★ -
okay now that those are out of the way things are going to get hard... all the following i love with all my heart so i'm going to rank them based on the smallest things.
#9 Growing Up
once more, Patton isn't my favorite. so that's why i'm putting this here, plus the echo at the end askjhsahg, but i love love this video. i remember we were waiting and oh so ready for the angst of nobody taking Patton seriously. and we received!! i love that though Roman and Logan are antagonists here, they're both so happy about Thomas wanting to have a healthy life. and i just adore the way Logan admits his mistake at the end and asks Patton directly. my heart... also aw.. the nostalgia. i remember none of us knew how to spell Patton's name and were writing it in very funny ways until Thomas and Joan told us lol.
#8 The Mind vs The Heart
when i watched this video the first times i didn't like it much, because i only had eyes for Virgil, but later i came back to it and loved it. so taking that into account i'm putting it here. logicality was the first ship i ever shipped in the show because i saw a gifset on tumblr of Patton screaming "what do you know about love?!" and Logan "apparently more than YOU" and the caption said "MARRIED", and i thought hey yeah... anyway. i love them. they're both my dads since that day.
this video is so so so relatable and i love it. Logan and Patton are so much fun arguing and i love how they compromise at the end and work together. im reconsidering.. i might move it higher? no, fine i'll leave it here.
#7 Making Some Changes
this video was absolutely hilarious. i personally couldn't see it as the Sides still once they were acted by Thomas' friends, i enjoyed it more as that bunch being silly and trying to be the sides but failing in so many ways, while sometimes nailing stuff suddenly. i really don't take this one too seriously as an episode. except Joan!Logan and Valerie!Logan, my beloved... i love how Joan acted as Logan and their voice and that they kept their ace ring on.. there's a reason i had them as my icon for so long. and Valerie looks a bit (a lot) like me with the glasses and dressed in dark colors, plus she spoke Spanish and there's .. no words to describe the joy i felt when seeing/hearing that. wait i'm getting emotional...
#6 My Personality Q&A
when i watched this Virgil was my favorite side and i didn't care much about the rest lol. when i heard his answers i related to him SO much it was scary, and also his voice is so soft and it was all very comforting. it was also when i first starting looking at Logan with more attention, because when he brought up Big Hero 6 and Fall Out Boy and said he didn't sing and would recite it like a poem? it only took a couple seconds but my brain said "me" and never went back.
now this video is a little underwhelming to watch for me, most of the appeal for me was in finding out the answers, and also watching it when we didn't know a lot about the sides. now we know more and want to know more so it's not as fun to me as it was first.
i wish so bad they'd do another one, although i know it would be more difficult with a much bigger audience, i think they can manage and i just need it. the chaos.. the energy.. they all being so savage with each other, learning little random facts about them you didn't expect.. i need it.
- ★ -
oh boy top 5 here we go. the next three are practically a tie. i can't choose.
#5 Alone on Valentines Day
i love Valerie, and the idea of this video was perfect and so perfectly excecuted. every side just giving their crazy opinions on how to woo a random stranger, i laughed SO much. first with Logan speaking simlish out of nowhere? at that point i didn't know practically anything about the sims except that it was some video game and the whiplash of Logan going AYO and the rest killed me. then when Roman whipped out that dialogue in Spanish??? my life was completed. i've never felt more happy than i did in that moment gosh. just the hilarity of Roman's drama, the shock of them speaking Spanish suddenly like that, the absolute JOY of seeing a creator i like speak (may i say) perfect Spanish, the other characters' faces after that.. never been happier.
also the conclusion was so cute. Virgil solving the whole problem without wanting to. i loved it.
#4 Am I Original
i think this video speaks for itself. it was fun to watch them all do the ideas Roman had, plus Logan and Virgil nodding at each other, (i love them so much), plus the angst at the end of Roman's perfectionism, plus Roman's just perfect name. this video has it all.
i think Thomas posted it kind of late at night and i watched it at 7am in the classroom as i waited for my classmates to arrive and the class to start. (i usually was like 40 minutes early to school due to mom’s work). i had to contain my laughter and it wasn’t easy.
#3 Losing My Motivation
i started loving this video after a while, when Logan passed Virgil in the position for my favorite side. but once he did this episode was beautiful. it's so funny and i love Logan and Patton's dynamic so much. and the video also so damn relatable in general. i felt so seen with it because they named all the problems i have when procrastinating, down to Patton's vague explanation of his feelings, it's exactly how i feel every time i want to do stuff. and the plot twist! i can hear the dramatic sound effect and see how they all turn to Logan clearly in my head, and it always makes me smile. plus there's so much Logan angst that can be dug up and overanalized. i love to watch it over and over.
#2 Accepting Anxiety
this video was perfect. everything we wanted. we knew it was coming and it delivered perfectly, better than any fanfic done in the waiting time. the week between the parts was agonizing but in a fun way somehow. i remember precisely when i was watching part 2 in my living room. i screamed. and i cried, a lot. i was feeling terrible at that time in my life and Thomas was such a comforting presence and i can't begin to describe how this episode made me feel.
and later it is always fun to rewatch with all their different reactions to being in Virgil's room, the energy of that was on point. Thomas is such a great actor and the characters where just amazingly performed. plus it gave so much to talk adn think about, the idea of the rooms, lots lots of insight into the characters, foreshadowing, so much. it's just perfect i have nothing else to say.
#1 (for purely emotional reasons, ironically) My Negative Thinking
i think Accepting Anxiety is the best episode of the season objectively but my favorite is My Negative Thinking. because i love Virgil and Logan so much and seeing them argue together was and is great. the comfort.. i can't repeat that word enough throughout this post. it's such a soft video while not being overwhelming with Patton and Roman's outbursts. just quiet (mostly) and clear and with perfectly timed humour.
Logan my beloved.. learning spanish... helping me with my own anxiety.. and their debate was so good. and the fact that they were friends i- i can't. Virgil didn't think Logan liked him and Logan told him explicitly that he did and the casual softness of it i cant even. Logan is happy that he tried.. it's just marvelous. Virgil and Logan as best friends will always be my favorite pair, and their dynamic will always be what i strive for in any relationship i might form, with both sides silently comforting each other within their own limits and realistic perspectives. so nice.
- ★ -
so yeah. that's all. thank you if you read all the way up to here. ♡ ♡ ♡
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nekomittchi · 3 years
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My Disney Fab 50 Statues
This is my version of the Disney Fab 50 statues for the WDW 50th Anniversary, and why I picked each one. My list aims much more to park history than the official list does. I'll note which ones are official statues by underlining them. These are in no particular order, but organized by park they'd be in. Magic Kingdom 1) Mickey - Obviously, Mickey, being the park and company mascot, needs to be here, and he's on the official list as well. I chose to put my version in his Philharmagic costume. It's got the hat from Fantasia/Sorcerer's Apprentice, which is well known, but tailored more to the park attraction. 2) Daisy Duck - One of the Fab 6, Daisy is also along for the ride. But unlike the official's "standard" outfit, I'm putting Daisy in a safari outfit to represent Jungle Cruise. Since Jungle Cruise doesn't really have any characters, I'm using outfits, like with Mickey, to represent attractions that otherwise would be left out. 3) Goofy - Another of the Fab 6, Mickey's best friend needs to be represented. Like Daisy, he's also repping a character-less ride. This time he's repping Big Thunder Railroad. As an added bonus, if they put him in a conductor outfit, it could also rep Mickey and Minnie's Runaway Railway, but that's at another park. 4) Pluto - The last of the Fab 6 in this park (the other two I'm placing elsewhere), Mickey's dog Pluto. And since the Park Wishables already put Mickey and Minnie in space suits for Space Mountain, let's give Pluto an astronaut helmet to represent it! And, as an added bonus, it doubles as a take-that at Universal, since Disney can't have Marvel in the WDW parks, and Pluto would be a joke on Cosmo (the space dog in the Collector's museum from Guardians of the Galaxy). 5) Sonny Eclipse - The first statue of mine that's not only unique to my list, but also represents something 100% in the park. I haven't been to Cosmic Rays myself, but from what I hear around WDWNT and WIGScord, it's pretty popular. Or at least Sonny is. So he gets a statue. 6) Merlin and Archmedes - Second statue unique to my list, and the first that's for the history of the park. Sorcerers of the Magic Kingdom was a scavenger hunt-type game that closed down early this year, and Merlin was kinda your guide for it. The game apparently had a lot of problems, but it looked really fun at the same time. 7) Genie - A surprising omition from the official list, and, unlike DLR, WDW actually has an Aladdin ride. The official list does have Abu, but I feel Genie is much more iconic and representitational of the movie. I'm also surprised that Carpet wasn't with Abu. 8) Pirate Dog - The Pirate Dog holding the keys is my representation of Pirates of the Caribbean. The dog might not be the most obvious pick, but as I'm trying to steer away from realistic-looking human characters, the dog was picked. Plus, they also made a Tsum Tsum and a Wishable of him, so... 9) Big Al OR Henry- This one's a toss-up. Either bear would do, and it's surprising to me that Country Bear Jamboree isn't represented. Of course, we know that it's a "less popular" attraction, so... 10) Madame Leota - The hitchhiking ghosts would also work to represent Haunted Mansion, but I think that having a gold statue inside of an ornate glass orb would look cooler. Plus, it only takes up one character slot, rather than 3. 11) Dumbo - One of the original rides from Disneyland, this classic has to be represented, and Disney agreed. Although I cut out Timothy. Didn't wanna take up another slot. 12) Stitch - Another statue to represent a past attraction, Stitch is here to represent Stitch's Great Escape. He's also, like the official statue, in his 626 form, because there's not nearly as much merchandise for him that way. 13) Winnie the Pooh - Piglet is with him on the official statue, but I think Pooh can stand on his own. Or, at least, eat hunny on his own. I mean, the ride is called "Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh," not "Pooh and Friends." Also, Tigger is way better than Piglet. 14) Mr. Toad - Another surprising omition from the list. Mr. Toad's Wild Ride might not be in Magic Kingdom anymore, but he's still fondly remembered, and they even made a Wishable of him (from the Disneyland 65th Anniversary set, but whatever). 15) Maleficent (Dragon) - The first of my statues that's not for an attraction, but a show (okay, Philharmagic is kinda a show, but shush). And she's also considered the "leader" of all of the Disney Villains, who are not represented at all in the official list, which I think is a shame. Sure, we all love the heroes, but who would those heroes be without their villains? 16) Face Clock - The only non-character in my list, the Face Clock is iconic enough for the World's Fair-turned-park ride. Because if you picked one of the dolls, which doll would you pick?! 17) Elliot - I've never seen the Main Street Electrical Parade myself (unless it was when I was 5), but I'd recognize the dragon float from Pete's Dragon anywhere. Bonus points if they could do the statue in such a way that it looked like the float, too. 18) Tinkerbell - The last of the revealed statues, Tinkerbell has come to represent Disney magic, both within and outside the parks, just as much as Mickey. Officially representing Peter Pan's Flight, I'd like to think that she also represents the Castle, like in the company card at the start of the movies. 19) Jose, Michael, Pierre, and Fritz - Yes, I know I've been trying to avoid "wasting" slots with multi-character statues, but... How could you pick just one of the Enchanted Tiki Room birds?! 20) Cheshire Cat - Cheshire and Mad Hatter both made the list (as separate statues), but I feel that Alice in Wonderland can be represented by Cheshire on his own. Plus, cat. 21) Boo - Monster's Inc Laugh Floor is an attraction that I wish was at DLR, so I could go on it, but even better than Sulley or Mike is the adorable Boo. 22) Jimminy Cricket - Yet another surprising omition from the list, Jimminy is almost as iconic to Disney Magic as Tinkerbell is. The official list has Pinocchio, but Jimminy is so much more "Disney" in general than Pinocchio. 23) Dopey - Seven Dwarfs Mine Train represent, as well as Disney's first animated feature. EPCOT 24) Donald Duck, Jose, and Panchito - Mickey's other best friend, here represented with the other two of the Three Caballeros, as represented in the Gran Fiesta Tour ride in the Mexico Pavillion. Like with the other members of the Fab 6, I chose to put him in an attraction outfit, and since I did, the other two had to come along for the ride. 25) Figment - Journey to Imagination (or whatever the current name of the attraction is) might be "meh" as a ride, but everyone loves Figment. Even Disney, who included him. 26) Olaf - I love Bruni. Bruni is probably my favorite character from all of Frozen. But Bruni isn't even named in the movie, he doesn't need to be on a statue. Olaf can represent Frozen Ever After by himself. 27) Remy - I'm shocked that Remy's not on the official list, given that his ride [officially] opens on the first day of the 50th Celebration, and represents the future of the parks. 28) Orange Bird - OB is on the official list, though in MK rather than EPCOT. All of the merch and such I've seen for him has been for the EPCOT festivals, so I'm sticking him here. 29) Rocket Racoon and Groot - Another statue to look to the future, for whenever Cosmic Rewind opens. Also, unlike the official statue, we are not using the realistic style from the official statue. The fur on Rocket looks so bad. Nah, instead we'll do him smooth, like the cartoons. 30) Mushu - Mushu was left out of the live action Mulan movie, but he's designed after traditional Chinese dragons, so let's put him over by the China Pavilion. 31) Marie - Did you really think that this list was not going to have my favorite character on it? I mean, really? Plus, we've got THREE mice/rats on the list, AND a dog, so we need another cat. Hollywood Studios 32) Minnie Mouse - And here we have the last of the Fab 6, Mickey's gal Minnie! Why is she in Hollywood Studios? Because she's representing Tower of Terror, wearing a cute outfit, of course! 33) DJ-R3X - Remember all those Fab 6 characters representing multiple characters? Yeah, R3X here is doing the same. Not only is DJ-R3X the DJ at Oga's Cantina in Galaxy's Edge, but he was originally RX-24, the pilot for the original version of Star Tours. Much better representation than BB-8 or R2-D2 from the official list. 34) Kermit the Frog - One of the more offensive omitions from the official list. MuppetVision3D is great fun, and the Muppets don't get nearly enough love, even with the Haunted Mansion special coming. 35) Chuuby - Okay, so sue me, I'm obsessed with the little merchandising bird. He's just too cute. 36) Woody and Buzz Lightyear - I know the official statue is Woody and Bo-Peep. But I haven't seen Toy Story 4 (or 3), so I want Buzz there. Disney's Animal Kingdom 37) Chip and Dale - Ya gotta have the little buddies! And who better to be wearing cute little Wilderness Explorer outfits? 38) The Yeti - So, the real Yeti might not work in Expedition Everest, but that doesn't mean he shouldn't be represented as a statue! Just make sure it's not realistic fur like that horrible Rocket statue. Stylized only! 39) Simba, Timon, and Pumbaa - Simba is separate from his friends in the official statue, but the trio (Simba as a child) should stick together. Festival of the Lion King is amazing to watch. You'll note a few things on my list: 1) There are no princesses. This was a specific omition on my part. The princesses have their own line of stuff, and are fairly over-used as it is. I wanted to get away from that. 2) As I mentioned with the Pirate Dog, I wanted to avoid realistic human characters. They either look good, or they don't. And I wanted a bit more of a similar style to everything, hence why I'm noting that Rocket should be done in the cartoon style, and the Yeti should be stylized. 3) Everything is tied into an attraction, land, or Disney Magic. Nothing is there solely from a movie. 4) My list only has 3 statues more than the official list. 5) For reference, here are the characters that are on the official list that are missing from mine: Timothy the Mouse (with Dumbo) Piglet (with Winnie the Pooh) Bruni (with Olaf) Bo-Peep (with Woody) Lumiere and Cogsworth Mad Hatter Pinocchio Gus and Jaq Lady and Tramp Abu Dante Miguel Pua and Hei-Hei Joe Gardener Edna Mode Frozone R2-D2 BB-8 Sebastian and Flounder Nemo and Dory Bambi and Thumper Of these, there are no major parks connections for Lumiere and Cogsworth, Lady and Tramp, Dante, Miguel, Pua and Hei-Hei (yet), Joe Gardener, Edna, and Frozone. Edna and Frozone especially bother me, as they're not even the main characters. Why couldn't we get a Jack-Jack instead? And Mr. Mittens and 22 over Joe Gardener? 6) And, finally, here are my statues that are new to my list: Sonny Eclipse Merlin and Archmedes Genie Pirate Dog Big Al Madame Leota Mr. Toad Maleficent Face Clock Elliot Jose, Michael, Pierre, and Fritz Boo Jimminy Cricket Dopey Remy Mushu Marie DJ-R3X Kermit the Frog Chuuby Buzz Lightyear The Yeti
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virtual-toast · 3 years
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Scream Queens VH1 recap - Season 1 Episode 1
Hey what’s up so because I’m bored as hell I’ve decided I’m going to recap the short-lived reality series Scream Queens (not the horror series with Emma Roberts) because it’s absolute top notch reality TV trash. Yes you can still watch the whole thing on YouTube here but I’ve decided to recap it for you in case you’d prefer to read about the trash and drama I guess lol
Anyway Scream Queens was a reality series on VH1 back in 2008-2010 where 10 “up and coming” (generous) actresses would compete for a “breakout role” (also generous) in the next Saw film. They’d do dumb challenges that were vaguely related to acting and of course bitch about each other behind the scenes. Season 1 was judged by Shawnee Smith (post-Saw fame), James Gunn (pre-Guardians of the Galaxy fame), and John Homa (apparently a big-time acting coach??). Season 2 switched out Shawnee Smith for Jaime King and James Gunn for Tim Sullivan. No idea how the show got two seasons but I fucking love it and I’ve watched it countless times over so let’s do a recap!
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Here’s your key players, folks.
The first episode opens with all the girls walking in wearing their ~finest~ mid-2000′s fashion and talking about how “omg I should be the next scream queen cuz I’m attractive / talented” etc. Jo-Anne in particular (who is 26 btw) claims she’s “getting old” and that she’s “ready for something to happen”. lol okay girl. They’re introduced to the three judges and whoo boy, Shawnee may be a decent actress but she should not be a host; her droning nasally voice is torture. We’re introduced to a few more girls including Lindsay who was a child star, and had a Nickelodeon show called Caitlin’s Way, but has since lost her way to her anxiety, and it’s just like holy shit I relate to you so hard though. There’s also Lina who thinks she’s top shit because she had one line in an Adam Sandler movie woohoo.
The judges introduce the first challenge and a pseudo-Jason Voorhees literally BUSTS THROUGH THE FUCKING WALL and sends the girls running and screaming, followed by laughing because omg what a funny prank haha. So basically the girls have to take turns begging this guy not to kill them, with the best performance getting a “guaranteed callback” aka. immunity from elimination. Most of the girls do the typical screaming and/or crying schtick. Michelle literally claims she’s pregnant and then screams “KILL ME WHY DONT’CHA” which is a choice. Kylah tries to seduce him and the other girls are torn between “she should be a porn star” and “holy shit I’m aroused”. Lina literally puts on a stereotypical Asian accent and FLOPS AROUND ON THE FLOOR SCREAMING like what the actual fuck. Jessica gets up and does the “you’re not psycho I’M PSYCHO” thing and the girls are (probably rightfully) scared of her.
But then Tanedra gets up and tells us she has ZERO acting experience and then proceeds to KILL. IT. Watch out for Tanedra cuz you know she’s coming for that crown. Obviously she gets the guaranteed callback. Shawnee announces the girls are competing for a role in Saw 6 and they FLIP. THEIR. SHIT. While at the same time you can tell none of them actually like or care about the Saw series and just want to be famous, but whatever get those dollars I guess.
So they head into the house and start drinking champagne, getting to know each other etc. Of course they all end up in their bikinis in the hot tub and start talking about their training. Cue all of the girls COMPLETELY underestimating Tanedra (despite the fact that she already beat all their asses) when she tells them she has no experience.
The next day the girls go to their first class with John Homa. Right off the bat he’s like, “Welcome to your first acting class, we’re gonna need it.” Like, true but also, rude. He gets out a tray of fruit and tells each girl to take a piece and eat it “as seductively as possible”. Cue several girls giving blowjobs to bananas and the rest basically dry humping the floor while they eat this damn fruit. Homa sighs like his instructions were SO CLEAR even though there weren’t any. He explains how he actually wants them to be subtle and seductive rather than outright sexy/slutty and has the girls sit in a chair while eating their fruit and being all cute and seductive. Great. Then he changes it up so the girls have been poisoned halfway through eating. Everyone does pretty well except Jo-Anne who very clearly buckles under the pressure. Back at the house, Sarah straight up tells the others that the class made her horny.
The following day a surprise picnic appears in the house but when the lid is taken off one of the dishes, a bunch of snakes come out because omg what a funny prank haha. There’s a note telling them where to meet Shawnee where she tells them their first “director’s challenge” (main challenge) is an adaptation of the bath scene from James Gunn’s movie Slither, and guess what, they gotta be naked! Or very nearly naked, at least. All of the girls get working on their scripts and discussing whether they’re going to go with nude underwear, pasties, or au naturale. Did you forget about Crazy Jessica? Well she has a FULL ON CRYING MELTDOWN about having to do a nude scene, complete with mocking the other girls just for talking about it. Like seriously this is day 2 and she’s FREAKING OUT. Sarah specifically says in her talking head, “Jessica is fucking psycho.”
They get to the director’s challenge, Sarah goes first and does really well, so the other girls are intimidated from the start. Jo-Anne once again buckles under the pressure, it’s like her spark literally goes away as soon as the cameras start rolling, it’s honestly baffling to watch. Tanedra and Michelle also do really well, although Michelle gets criticised by some of the others for her over acting. Kylah literally sounds like she’s in a cross between a pantomime and a musical and the other girls flat-out laugh at her behind the scenes. Finally it’s Jessica’s turn, and little miss freak out is just like BA-DING HERE ARE MY TITTIES. Like seriously, after all that, she goes buck naked. WTF. Her performance is still meh though.
Back at the house, Michelle is confident she won’t be on the list and that Kylah will be. Tanedra reads the list which “summons” Michelle, Jo-Anne, Kylah, Sarah, and Jessica to the “grand ballroom”. Cue Michelle’s FULL BLOWN TANTRUM because she was SO SURE she wasn’t going to be on the list and “THEY’RE GONNA THROW THIS FUCKING TALENT AWAY??” You seriously can barely hear her dialogue in this part because there is so much swearing getting bleeped out. Aside from this everyone generally agrees that Kylah should go home because she has no acting talent (lol) and that there’s no way Jo-Anne is going because they all love her.
The girls go to the grand ballroom and honestly if looks could kill, all three judges would be dead because Michelle is fucking letting them KNOW she’s pissed hahaha. They pull Michelle and Sarah forward together and tell them they were the top 2 (so much for your tantrum Michelle) with Sarah getting leading lady (winning the main challenge). Jessica gets pulled forward on her own and basically just gets read for being crazy and told to calm down. Kylah and Jo-Anne are last and are the bottom 2; Jo-Anne basically for shutting down and Kylah for just being shit. In a controversial decision, however, Jo-Anne gets the axe while Kylah lives another week.
Stay tuned for Season 1 Episode 2!
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mythvoiced · 4 years
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Character Interview: Kaeden, Lotte & Taejoo bc I couldn’t pick lmao
( repost, don’t reblog )
BASICS
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NAME: Yi Kiha Kaeden NICKNAME: K AGE: 19 at the time of his death Ageless SPECIES: Grim reaper (lore based on tvN’s Goblin)
PERSONAL
MORALITY: Chaotic Neutral Chaotic Good RELIGION: Abides to none SINS: greed / gluttony / sloth / lust / pride / envy /  wrath VIRTUES: chastity / charity / diligence / humility / kindness / patience / justice PRIMARY GOALS IN LIFE: Momentarily undefined, he stopped claiming souls as a form of rebellion towards a system of neutrality he doesn’t agree with, but he isn’t sure what to do from here KNOWN LANGUAGES: Primarily speaks Korean and other languages he might find/need for his area (Chinese, Japanese, or Thai, for example, as well as English), but as a reaper, he has the ability to speak the language he needs to speak to communicate with a soul PHYSICAL BUILD: scrawny  / bony /  slender  / fit / athletic  /  curvy  /  herculean  /  pudgy  /  average HEIGHT: 5′11′ roughly, although he does wear shoes that make him appear even taller WEIGHT: n/a bc meh SCARS  /  BIRTHMARKS: Covered in scars of various sizes, more on the small side of things, because his skin used to break easily, but he wasn’t allowed near situations that would give him larger ones None ABILITIES  / POWERS: Invisibility, imperceptibility, soul reading, can ‘claim’ souls as a reaper which basically means he cuts their ties to the mortal realm entirely so that they may move on to whatever afterlife they’ve been assigned to, they can not move on without having said ties cut by a reaper specifically assigned to them, first (Kaeden does not know how this works, it’s an instinctual affair, and he does not know what afterlife the souls are then assigned to) RESTRICTIONS: While it is essential for a reaper to be capable of disappearing either entirely or at least within a crowd, people who have met a reaper before (and therefore already been exposed to their general existence) are more likely to spot him and remember him for a longer time after that; even more so if close to death, then the person will be able to detect and describe Kaeden as they would any person, by being more sensitive to a reaper’s presence; he can only read souls that are assigned to him, even if he were to encounter spirits they would appear to him as just that and nothing more, while he would be able to call a soul assigned to him he just met by their name, preferred pronouns, as well as know about important moments in their lives and the circumstances of their death; his soul reading is also restricted to souls that are no longer inhabiting a body (so, souls of the comatose or those astral projecting included) and not of the living, and it is not possible for him to see any soul that isn’t purely human (enhanced humans aka humans with powers but without supernatural genes, aka psychics but not werewolves, count as creatures he can see); he cannot cut the ties of souls that weren’t assigned to him (main reason his stopping to do so is causing problems, because even if other reapers were to find the souls assigned to him, they wouldn’t be able to help them)
FAVORITES
FOOD: Poor taste buds, everything tastes dry and dull He doesn’t need to eat but he does like salty snacks and spicy food DRINK: None Sweet alcoholic beverages, he seems to favour things that taste strongly these days PIZZA TOPPING: Lots and lots of garlic COLOR(S): Navy blue / black / dark grey / multiple shades of blue to be honest / royal purple MUSIC GENRE: Disco to rave music, a huge fan of Todrick Hall BOOK GENRE: Historical nonfiction (he likes to learn) MOVIE GENRE: Action, documentaries, high fantasy SEASON: Winter CURSE WORD: The Fuck Word™️ (lmao, i’m leaving this, it’s perfect) SCENTS: Lavender, roses, incense (all sorts of types)
FUN STUFF
BOTTOM OR TOP: Probably a switch, leaning towards bratty annoying bitchy loudmouthed power bottom (mostly because that’s already his personality, yknow) SINGS IN THE SHOWER?: Doesn’t need to shower, but he probably would
tagged by: @illusinae​ TYSM <3
tagging: @enchcntd​ @intergalacticxmisfits​ (THEO!) @rubiesintherough​ @voxvulgi​ @sweetmarzipan​ @foxcharmed​ @gentleanne​ @zodiachild​ @repetiita​ @tckkis​ & YOU
Lotte & Taejoo under the cut
BASICS
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NAME: Go Kihyun Choi Lotte NICKNAME: Lotto by @enchcntd​ uwu AGE: 24 Unknown, presumably early to mid-twenties SPECIES: Human
PERSONAL
MORALITY: Chaotic Good True Neutral RELIGION: Agnostic Doesn’t really know SINS: greed / gluttony / sloth / lust / pride / envy /  wrath VIRTUES: chastity / charity / diligence / humility / kindness / patience / justice PRIMARY GOALS IN LIFE: None at the moment, he’s rather passively moving through life, his current ‘present’ satisfies him and he isn’t looking for anything more KNOWN LANGUAGES: Korean (fluent), English (solely what he needs for English songs) PHYSICAL BUILD: scrawny  / bony /  slender  / fit / athletic  /  curvy  /  herculean  /  pudgy  /  average HEIGHT: 5′7′ although he does wear large clothes that make it hard to guess what his body, in its entirety, really looks like WEIGHT: n/a bc meh SCARS  /  BIRTHMARKS: A thin one on his left temple that seems to run towards his forehead and disappear under his hairline  ABILITIES  / POWERS: No supernatural/enhanced abilities/powers RESTRICTIONS: N/a
FAVORITES
FOOD: Not much of a foodie so he’ll probably just eat what he’s given/what he happens to. He does really love ramyeon, though DRINK: Nothing too specific, but he likes cold ones PIZZA TOPPING: No particular preferences, he’s just not a big fan of anything too spicy and he also prefers toppings without meat COLOR(S): Light colours, mostly light blue and grey MUSIC GENRE: R&B, mostly, Jazz BOOK GENRE: Not much of a reader MOVIE GENRE: Not much of a movie watcher, either, he’ll just watch whatever is on SEASON: Spring CURSE WORD: He doesn’t curse, finds no use for it SCENTS: Anything soft, nothing too strong
FUN STUFF
BOTTOM OR TOP: Unclear, preferably neither SINGS IN THE SHOWER?: Absolutely, all the time, takes too long showering just because he’s in the middle of a song
---
BASICS
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NAME: Kim Taejoo NICKNAME: TJ, if you feel inclined to, Tae, he doesn’t mind either way AGE: 25 SPECIES: Gifted/enhanced human
PERSONAL
MORALITY: Fluctuates between Neutral Good and True Neutral RELIGION: Agnostic SINS: greed / gluttony / sloth / lust / pride / envy /  wrath VIRTUES: chastity / charity / diligence / humility / kindness / patience / justice PRIMARY GOALS IN LIFE: Earning money, truly. He lives in a dingy apartment downtown but even for that he barely manages rent-wise, and he’d really like to move somewhere where it doesn’t smell like no one’s opened a single window in three years KNOWN LANGUAGES: Korean (fluent), English (conversational) PHYSICAL BUILD: scrawny  / bony /  slender  / fit / athletic  /  curvy  /  herculean  /  pudgy  /  average HEIGHT: 5′10′’, he does look taller solely because of the way he holds himself, but also smaller due to his body build WEIGHT: n/a bc meh SCARS  /  BIRTHMARKS: Tiny scars on his hands, due to glass shards he fell into once ABILITIES  / POWERS: Telekinesis, ergo the ability to move matter with one’s mind; he can manipulate most of the tables he’s usually made to work at in the casino RESTRICTIONS: Can only move inanimate objects, ergo no animals or people; can only move objects he would be able to physically move/have the physical strength to move; can only move objects he’s aware of, he can’t move anything behind a door that he doesn’t know is there; extensive/prolonged use of his ability will lead to increasingly intense headaches and physical as well as mental exhaustion; if he tries to move an object that is already moving, his success in doing so is determined by whether or not the force of movement of the object is stronger than his own, as well as momentum and direction; accidental use is possible if he’s experiencing intense emotions or sensations (this is the main reason he’s so calm and collected all the time, his childhood and teenage years have taught him that accidentally using his powers leads to horrible and painful situations, so he’s reeling himself in at all times).
FAVORITES
FOOD: Warm food, not too fond of anything that is mushy, though. DRINK: Coffee, although he usually tries to keep his hands off of it, not a good influence PIZZA TOPPING: He likes it best with only tomato sauce, garlic, and oregano (we call that a Napoletana, fun fact, ‘s also my favourite one <w<) COLOR(S): Brown tones, warm colours MUSIC GENRE: R&B, Indie BOOK GENRE: Murder mystery, psychological thrillers MOVIE GENRE: He doesn’t like anything too... action, to be honest, he prefers gems like Ex Machina or smart plot twists like Now You See Me SEASON: Summer CURSE WORD: 'Hell’, he really... doesn’t curse much SCENTS: Coffee, freshly baked pastries, he’d live in coffee shops if he could
FUN STUFF
BOTTOM OR TOP: Power/dominant bottom SINGS IN THE SHOWER?: Not really, he’s a lil boring sometimes
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stereksecretsanta · 5 years
Text
Merry Christmas, @greenleaf1316!
Summary: Five times Laura played matchmaker for Stiles and Derek and one time she didn’t have to. Or: Laura’s guide to dating.
Autor’s notes: This is a Sterek Secret Santa 2019 gift for green-leaf, who asked for, among others, Fluff and Feels, Lydia, and Hale Family. I tried to make something lighthearted and it involves Laura and Lydia, although I couldn’t hold back angst completely – there is a mention of Kate and her relationship with Derek, although it’s vague.
I hope you’ll like the story! I admit I had some trouble finishing it because I didn’t have enough time (real life, am I right?) so if there are any mistakes, I’m sorry about that.
Inspired by isthatbloodonhisshirt's fic Get Together (Or So Help Me!).
That said, merry Christmas! May sterek stay strong with you.
*****
Tuples
The Things You Have in Common, Or, The Revelation
Laura doesn’t know what it is about mathematics that makes her think of anything but mathematics.
“A tuple,” says Deaton, “is a list of elements. What’s interesting about them, however, is that they can have different data types. I will explain this further during the math club if anyone’s here interested…”
And Laura is already watching Lydia’s perfect notes, her manicure, then turns to stare out of the window. At least she isn’t the only one to not pay attention to the class – Derek is scowling at his notebook, tightly gripping his pen. He grimaces and carefully whites out the pink heart that was drawn on the margin.
Honestly, Laura doesn’t know what’s the fuss about. Sure, Paige was nice, pretty, and funny, but it’s been so much time already. Things haven’t been that good between them for a while and it was coming, anyone could see it. Yet Derek always makes the same expression when thinking about her.
Paige had to move out because of her parents but it was an opportunity. Even Derek admitted she should go to this music school she's been dreaming about. However, he was marathoning Star Wars later, and sometimes Laura still catches him coming back to the films.
Laura sighs and looks away, a flash of something catching her eyes. It’s a keychain with R2-D2 hanging from Stiles’ bag. Because Stiles likes Star Wars.
And he likes Batman. 
And comic books.
By the end of the class, Laura’s notebook is full of things common for Stiles and Derek instead of tuples, sets, and multisets.
As there’s a bell signaling the end of the class, Laura breathes, “I’m a genius.’”
* * *
“You’re an idiot,” says Lydia.
“Give me one reason for why that’s a bad idea,” replies Laura, raising her index finger. 
“First, you’re making Derek fall into another relationship when he doesn’t want to. Second, you’re not giving him enough time to grieve. Three, what have I told you about amatonormativity? Expecting everyone to be better off in a monogamous-“
“Relationship, yeah, I know. But I’m not making them do anything,” says Laura. “I’m just… creating… possibilities. Just giving Derek a little push. Besides, how much time does he need? Come on, it’s been almost a year, and that thing with Paige wasn’t all that serious.”
Lydia doesn’t answer, so Laura continues, “And hey, at least I’m not heteronormative. So. Will you help me?”
“Of course not.”
 School As A Natural Habitat  
“I can’t believe I’m here,” says Lydia again.
“Shh. We’re observing them in their natural habitat, they can’t know we’re here.”
“They already know we’re here, it’s our school. And since when is school a natural habitat?”
Laura ignores her and lowers her voice. ‘Now we can see as the predator stalks his prey-“
“Wait, Stiles is the predator?”
“Well, it’s not Derek, right?” reasons Laura.
“You’re right.”
“The predator stops, analyzing his prey, his gaze gone cold and calculating, imagining the best way to conquer-“
“You think too highly of Stiles.”
“-but it means nothing when faced with the fiery heart of burning passion and desire. Stiles can’t stop himself anymore – he wants, no, he needs to see Derek-“
“Wait, how did it turn from an animal documentary to a soap opera?”
Laura shrugs. “I just describe what I see.”
“How does your brain work?”
Stiles comes up to Derek, they exchange a few words, and then Stiles nods and goes away.
Laura blinks. “Considering they are perfect for each other, that was rather disappointing.’
“Well, what did you expect?’
“Frankly, the same enlightenment I had during the mathematics. Like, they would see each other just understand, you know?”
Lydia makes a face. “I really don’t.”
“What do you think they talked about?”
“Probably math project.”
Laura slowly turns to Lydia, the hope reviving inside her. “Oh my god, you’re right.”
“What? Why?” asks Lydia, stiffening. 
“They can work together for the math project. See? It’s all about possibilities.”
Lydia looks at her. “It always makes me nervous when you agree with me and it’s always for a good reason.”
* * *
2. Cinema Date To Get To Know Each Other
“Did you know that 0,5% of people find their significant others in a cinema?” says Laura. She has no idea what’s the real number but 0,5% sounds reasonable enough. “That’s why you should go to the cinema.”
Derek gives her his ‘you’re an idiot’ face but honestly, Laura can’t even acknowledge that he tries. He’s no half as good at it as Lydia. 
“You say that like it’s a lot but it’s really not.”
“If you go, you raise the probability of the already possible,” argues Laura. “Which means it’s gonna happen.”
“Look, even I can tell that’s not how it works.”
“Even I can tell you don’t know shit about dating.”
“That makes no sense!”
“Jesus, just go,” says Laura, directing Derek to the door. “Here’s your ticket. Row at the back, seat 10, you’re welcome. Oh, and by the way, you’re going with Stiles.” Laura grins and closes the door in his stunned face.
* * *
“You’re a terrible date,” says Lydia. “Late, focused on other people, won’t accommodate my needs-“
“Your needs are stupid,” replies Laura, rolling her eyes. Who doesn’t like caramel popcorn?
“If you’re hungry we can go to the Red Sun restaurant after the movie.”
“I’m not going there, they always eye me oddly when I’m there.”
“That’s just because you had worn jeans, sneakers, and Wonder Woman shirt back then.”
“My Cat Woman shirt didn’t help either.”
Lydia gives her one of her My Patience Is Eternal But You’ll See The End Of It looks. “Black and white colors aren’t enough to make something elegant, Laura.”
“Whatever. And I told you I was late because it took me ages to convince Derek to come.” Laura straightens, then hides behind her bowl of popcorn. “They’re here! Why are they arguing?”
Lydia watches the boys for a while. “Seems like they don’t like the film you’ve chosen.”
“How do you know that?”
“Lip reading.”
Laura blinks and glances at Lydia. “Sometimes I forget how amazing you are.”
“Then don’t,” advises Lydia. “Derek is entirely against the film but Stiles is trying to defend it. I don’t think it’s working.”
“Free tickets,” mutters Laura, “and they still have problems. Well excuse me, but I didn’t have much room to choose from.”
“About that – why did you choose a romantic comedy?”
Laura raises her eyebrows. “Uh, so that they make a connection between love and themselves.” She barely holds back a ‘duh’. 
“I don’t think that’s how a human brain works,” replies Lydia. “Also, are we going to talk about ethical repercussions of you stalking them?”
“I have good intentions so it’s fine,” replies Laura easily.
“You know, sometimes I’m jealous of how simply you see the world. But no, Laura, you’re stalking Derek and Stiles. It’s creepy.”
Laura mulls it over for a second. “How about I tell them later about it? And buy them food to apologize.”
“You can bribe Stiles and Derek, but it won’t work on your moral judgment.”
Laura frowns. “Wait, you think I’ll feel bad about it later? I won’t.”
Lydia shakes her head. “You sure are something else. Come on, they already went inside the movie room.”
They start walking, trying to remain hidden from Stiles and Derek.
“Oh, it’s like we’re detectives on a case! Hold my pipe, Watson.”
Lydia makes a face. “Sherlock Holmes never said that. How come it’s the first thing that came to your mind? And was it supposed to be sexual?”
“Oh,” notices Laura and laughs. “Man, I’m hilarious.”
3. Bowling Date With Mutual Friends
“Hey guys,” says the waiter and smiles at them. “Double date?”
Laura’s smile freezes for a second. She doesn’t like the thought and is surprised herself to see how much. It’s not the first time someone thought she and Stiles are dating, and the sheer thought that Lydia and Derek would date is ridiculous. Even back when Lydia was dating Jackson Laura was always rolling her eyes at the mention of two of them. 
Derek is the first to react. He looks at the waiter seriously and says, “Never.”
“Oh, you wish you were on a date with me,” shoots Stiles.
“I can’t imagine a fate worse than that,” replies Derek. “I’d die of secondhand embarrassment.”
“I can be charming when I want to,” replies Stiles, defensive. “it’s just that there’s no point to make an effort for you.”
“That’s just it, you have to put an effort to be even remotely dateable. And it’s not worth it,” says Derek. “Dates are just… meh.”
Stiles raises his eyebrows. ‘Evidently, you’ve never been on a date with me.”
“No, evidently, you’ve never been on a date, period,” counters Derek. “You have to make conversation, think of the other person, plan everything, be nice and funny… It’s not worth it,” Derek repeats.
Stiles frowns. “Then how about you go on a date with someone you already know a bit?”
Laura watches in tension, wondering if that’s the moment one of the boys – or maybe even both – will realize. 
“But there’s no one that I know and am interested in.”
“Huh. Well, that sucks,” comments Stiles.
“It’s not that bad,” Derek shrugs. “I got used to it.”
“It’s not a double date,” says Laura, turning to the waiter, “but it will be,” she promises darkly.
“Four cokes and one alley for an hour,” orders Lydia and watches the waiter leaving to prepare the drinks. She sighs deeply and says, “Tell me all about a secondhand embarrassment.”
* * *
“So I take it not one of us knows how to play bowling,” grins Stiles.
“I think I’m pretty good,” says Derek.
“Not you,” replies Stiles coldly. “You’re a freak when it comes to sports.”
“You don’t have to be jealous,” says Derek, condescending. “I could teach you.”
“Aren’t you the picture of an arrogant jock,” says Stiles. “Together with not understanding the basic concepts of math.”
Derek’s smirk falls off.
“Right!” Laura claps her hands. “Do you guys know already with whom you’ll be doing math project?’’
“Lydia?” asks Stiles hopefully.
“No way,” replies Laura. “Lydia’s with me.”
Lydia narrows her eyes thoughtfully. “As long as you promise a few strikes and at least one 5-bagger.”
“Promise.”
“I’m sold,” states Lydia. 
“Don’t leave me like that! I know nothing about bowling.”
No one would believe something like that coming from Stiles. 
“Fine, I may have read about it a bit,” Stiles huffs out. “I know the best techniques and all this shit but it’s not enough. It’s never enough,” he adds bitterly.  
“Come on, how hard it can be?” asks Laura. “You’re just rolling a ball.”
“You have no right to speak,” replies Stiles. “You’re a freak like Derek.”
“And that’s why I’ll be in a team with Lydia and you’ll be in a team with Derek. For math project, too.”
“No way,” says Stiles. “I’d rather be in a team with you, and Lydia can be with Derek.”
Laura grimaces. “You want to play into the waiter’s expectations?”
“Why not? It’s funny,” says Stiles.
“Wouldn’t it be funny if he thought it was a double date but with me and Lydia and you and Derek?”
Stiles and Derek stare at her.
“No,” says Stiles. “That would be just weird.”
‘’You sound like a straight guy,” says Laura.
“Now that’s just offensive.’’
In the end, though, that’s how they play. Lydia and Laura win, although Derek does try to tutor Stiles. He gets considerably better but Laura did get a 5-bagger. She may boast about it.
4. Romantic Restaurant Date
“Derek opened the door for Stiles. They both dressed up nicely. They are still civil to each other. What the hell,’’ muses Laura, watching them through the aquarium, “my plan is actually working.”
“You sound way too surprised considering how confident you were in your project.”
“Oh please,” says Laura. “My idea is brilliant, Derek and Stiles should be together. It’s just that I was going about it the wrong way. I mean, let’s face it – Derek’s hopeless. Stiles is the one who can bring them together.”
“Is that so?” asks Lydia. Just as she opens her mouth to say something more, the waiter comes to take their orders. They talk for a while and once the waiter leaves, Lydia says, “Oh, Stiles is reading a book.”
“Hm?” Laura doesn’t take her eyes off of the menu. If there’s one thing she loves about Red Sun, it’s the steaks. Just imagining the taste of each one is a pleasure in itself.
“Stiles took out a book and now is reading it aloud to Derek,” explains Lydia.
Laura frowns and tries to watch the boys through the aquarium. She thought it was smart to take this table, to observe and not be seen, but it’s difficult to guess what’s exactly going on through the mass of water, algae, and fish swimming around.
“This dork,” she says finally, disbelieving. “I gave him The Manly Art of Seduction book under the excuse of him mentioning dating a lot during bowling. He was supposed to read it and try all of the moves on Derek! It even has a whole chapter about seduction at a restaurant.”
“They are laughing at all the advice,” observes Lydia. “At least they seem to be having fun.”
“I want them to be together, not have fun,” replies Laura, put off. “Can you tell what they are talking about?”
“No way, I can’t see them clearly through the water.”
“I’m going to the bathroom and will try to listen in,” says Laura. “They won’t recognize me like this, right?” she asks, gesturing at her clothes.
“Even I have a hard time believing it’s you,” says Lydia. “You look so nice today.”
Laura rolls her eyes and stands up.
“Basically, the right smile is the basis,” says Stiles now. “Give me your best smile, Derek.”
Laura doesn’t see the expression Derek makes, but it makes Stiles lean back from him. “Whoa, okay, it is an invitation to intimacy but of a deathly kind, you know? You should be friendly and relaxed, not dreadful and deranged. Come on, no smile, no game.”
“I don’t need a game,” replies Derek. “You want to be seductive and shit, you try that.”
Laura’s already passing them but she still hears when Derek asks, “Why are you winking? Jesus.”
Already on her way there, Laura decides to go to the toilet. Once inside, she catches her reflection in the mirror and has to pause. 
She really looks different. Laura has never liked to wear jewelry and fancy clothes because they tend to hinder movements which makes no sense to her. That’s exactly the reason she decided to dress this way tonight.
Now that she thinks of it, Lydia’s words might have a grain of truth to them. Laura is confident neither Stiles nor Derek will recognize her as they won’t even imagine Laura being this elegant – they’d just assume it’s a look-alike. That’s also why Laura didn’t even bother to color her hair like Lydia. 
On her way back, she again slows down her pace to listen to Stiles and Derek.
“It’s your shoe,” says Stiles. “It’s weird. I can’t focus, it’s shape is wrong.”
“It’s a normal shoe, Stiles.”
“And your pants. The material feels strange when I rub it.”
“Shut up and rub. It was your idea to try it out and get better.”
Their voices are hushed so she can’t hear as much as earlier, although that may be for the better. Because, okay, Laura must admit she feels a bit weird. As much as she thought about Stiles and Derek’s relationship, she’s never considered its… physical side. 
She finds her table and sees that the entry was served already. Awesome – she’s hungry and can’t wait to try Red Sun’s food, the restaurant has never failed her. Yet now, instead of eating, she watches Lydia.
She’s beautiful, of course. Lydia’s always taken care to be elegant. Tonight, she has a new dress and earrings which bring out the green in her eyes.
“Well?” asks Lydia.
“Stiles and Derek are playing footsie.”
Lydia raises her eyebrow. “They are lucky the tablecloths here are long enough.” She turns to watch the boys for a second. “Who’d have thought, they seem quite serious about it.” 
Laura makes a face. “We don’t have to do that, right?”
“Why would we have to?”
“I don’t know, it feels like we should do that. There’s always this scene in the movies,” replies Laura. “When characters dress nicely.”
Lydia shrugs, not looking at her.
‘So we won’t play footsie,” repeats Laura to make sure. “I mean, it’s not like you need to train, right? To get more confidence or something. Be charming. Whatever.”
It’s a while before Lydia replies, bringing a glass to her mouth to sip some water and put it down. “Yeah,” she says slowly. “We won’t.”
Laura already knew the answer but the time it took Lydia to answer kind of annoys her. “Yeah. Footsie is not, like, cello, it’s not based on the muscle memory,” she adds. 
“I was thinking of telling you sometime so I suppose it can be now. I’m gay, Laura,” says Lydia. “I like girls more than boys.”
Laura’s mind blanks for a minute, then starts working a mile a minute. “Oh,” she manages through it all.
“I didn’t mean to hide it from you,” adds Lydia, sounding apologetic. “I just wanted to make sure first.”
“Make sure,” echoes Laura. Because Lydia is a lesbian. Right. You need to make sure of it first, huh? Yeah. 
Lydia nods. 
Laura wills herself to react normally. “It’s good that you know now,” part of her brain says. The other one still freaks out, even though, honestly, there’s nothing to freak out about. When she heard that Derek was bi and that Stiles was gay it made no change to her. But this is Lydia. She was, like, dating Jackson. Sure, it wasn’t serious, but they were going on dates and stuff together. 
Lydia nods again. 
The silence stretches between them but Laura has no idea how to fill it in. She gives up altogether when the waiter comes up with their dishes. 
Halfway through the meal, Laura can’t believe her mind is still reeling from the news. She’s always thought of herself as an accepting person. Maybe she has this much difficulty now because they were always so similar, Laura has assumed Lydia was straight, too. To Laura, sexuality has never been a question. She liked boys. What’s there to think about?
Boys.
Laura suddenly remembers about Stiles and Derek and snaps her head to them. Fortunately, nothing’s going on. They are eating desserts and talking, so Laura turns away.
She frowns at the last bite of her steak and looks at them again. It’s actually going really well. Stiles must have just said a joke as he grins expectantly at Derek, who huffs out a laugh and looks at him from under his lashes. 
“Oh, seriously?” she asks, breaking the silence, and looks at Lydia. She’s so frustrated she forgets about the atmosphere for a second. “They are still making fun of the advice in the book.”
Lydia observes them for a while. “Are you sure?”
“It’s chapter 10, ‘Body Language’ and Reading It. And it only makes Derek look stupid,” says Laura. At Lydia’s look, she adds, “I skimmed through it before giving it to Stiles.”
Lydia smiles. “Remember anything good?”
Oh. Laura didn’t know Lydia could make this expression. It’s like… it could mean something. Talking about flirting advice is not flirting itself, right? It’s just talking. How do you flirt? Lydia glances at her. It’s getting worse. How do you talk? “Uh-“
“Can I take your plates?”
Laura startles but nods at the waiter. 
“Can we have a receipt?” asks Lydia. 
“Sure.” The waiter leaves with their plates and Laura blinks. She kind of hoped for a dessert but then again, the atmosphere feels strange. No wonder Lydia wants to end this quickly.
* * *
During the weekend, Laura concludes that she’s a horrible person. No wonder Lydia cut their time short, she has all the reasons to avoid Laura now. She decides to apologize to Lydia on Monday and do whatever she asks, even if it’s taking a break from each other for a while.
However, when she sees Lydia the next day, she hears, “I’m sorry.”
Laura frowns. “Why?”
“I knew it was a surprise to you, yet I got frustrated that you weren’t 100% accepting.” 
“I, uh, I tried,” says Laura with a grimace. “It’s just, well-“ she deflates suddenly. “Yeah. It was a surprise.”
It’s better, but not that much better. During lunch, it irks Laura that Lydia glances at Allison passing them and blurts out, “She’s straight. She’s dating Scott McCall.”
Lydia shrugs. “I’m just looking.”
And it still annoys Laura. She’s never thought she could be this much of a homophobe.
The thoughts of Lydia take up space usually sacrificed for Stiles and Derek, which means that by the end of the week, she finds Stiles just to say, “No plans for the weekend. Do whatever.”
“Oh, that’s good,” says Stiles. “You finished your project?”
Laura shrugs. “Something like that.”
“I’m coming over to Derek to play some video games.”
Laura stares at him. “To Derek?”
“Yep.”
“You’re willingly spending time together?”
“Well, not exactly. We need to prepare this math project and something to motivate us. So we decided that each gets to pick something the other hates to do while we meet.”
“Huh,” manages Laura. “Okay. I don’t get it.”
Stiles shrugs. “What’s there to not get? It’s mutual suffering for the mutual benefit.”
“Right,” nods Laura, staring at Stiles, the shrugs again. “If it works.”        
“You’d be surprised.”      
5. Home Visit
Laura watches as the teabag sinks and resurfaces with the movement of her hand. The teabag’s string stays on the surface of the liquid and Laura thinks about surface tension. Her mother always makes tea when she needs to think about something and Laura stares down at the liquid, waiting for the results, but so far nothing. 
“Oh hey,” says Stiles, entering the kitchen. He looks at Laura for a moment. “You okay?”
“I’m thinking about surface tension.”
“That bad, huh?” Stiles pours himself some coke. “You can come to play sudoku with us.”
“Weren’t you supposed to play video games?”
“Derek’s turn,” explains Stiles. “It’s him tormenting me now.”
“Your fair system truly amazes me.” 
“Honestly, me too,” says Stiles and angles to the door. “Anyway, the offer stands.”
“Thanks, but I think I’ll go watch something.”
Derek’s always watching Star Wars when feeling down so Laura figures it wouldn’t hurt to try.
As The Force Awakens plays, Laura decides to try out Stiles’ method of using the sofa in every way but intended, with legs on the backrest and head on the floor. She still has no idea how to amend her relation with Lydia. 
She sighs and looks to the side, under the sofa. Like this, she can notice something pink standing out from a place just next to one of the sofa’s legs. Frowning, she reaches to take it but it seems to be fixed to the material. Curious, Laura forgets about the movie completely and slides to the floor.
It’s a piece of paper pinned to the material of the sofa. Laura takes the pin and carefully releases the paper.    
She sits back on the sofa, this time normally, and reads what turns out to be a note on a pink, girly  paper.
Derek,
I hoped you were more mature than that but part of the fault is mine, for expecting something from a child you turned out to still be. I don’t hold it against you, sweety. We could still have some fun but I won’t wait forever.
Kate
Laura reads the note again and then again, but the content still doesn’t make any sense. The only Kate Derek could know is younger than them and deep in her goth phase. She’d never use this kind of stationery, with the imprinted hearts on the side. Not to mention that the note seems to written by someone older. The ‘have some fun’ part makes her especially uneasy.
Well, no point in thinking about it. Laura stands up and is already going upstairs before it strikes her as really bizarre that Derek would pin the note under the sofa. She stops, frowning. If he wanted to hide it, he could do that very well in his room, but for some reason chose the living room, used by everyone in the family and the guests. 
This seems like the kind of thing you need to think about. Admittedly, that’s not Laura’s strongest point. What would Lydia do? 
First, she definitely wouldn’t confront Derek about it right away. Slowly, Laura turns away and comes back to still playing Star Wars.
She reads the note one last time and carefully pins it back to place. 
* * *
Laura waits. It’s not until Wednesday that she asks Lydia about the note. She wanted to have the time to think of something herself but it didn’t help. The longer she waits, the more it only unsettles her.
“Do you know if Derek knows someone called Kate?”
Lydia searches her locker for something but the moment she hears the name, she freezes. It’s just for a second, easy to overlook but Laura’s watching her closely. 
“You know something,” she says, surprised. “And I could tell that,” she realizes, amazed. “Like I’m a special agent or something.”
“Or something,” agrees Lydia, her mouth quirking before she sighs. “Yes, I saw them once together. I can’t tell you more, though. Derek wanted me to keep quiet.”
“That makes no sense,” argues Laura. “Why wouldn’t he tell me? I thought he was thinking about Paige all this time. I called him Hopeless Romeo Soulpuzzle.”
Lydia doesn’t answer. “How do you know about Kate, anyway?”
“Found a note from her.” Laura glances at Lydia and bites her lip. “Honestly, I don’t know what to do about it.”
Lydia doesn’t answer for a second. “If I were you, I’d talk to him about it. Say something like, I found this by chance, I admit I’m curious but also a bit worried? And I know it’s not my business but-“
“It kind of is my business, though,” Laura interrupts her. “I mean, I have vested interest in Derek being single so that he can date Stiles.”
“Oh, haven’t you heard? Derek asked Stiles out yesterday but got rejected,” says Lydia.
Wait. What? 
“What?” asks Laura stupidly. 
“Yeah, I’m not sure what this is about,” continues Lydia. “I’ll have to talk to Stiles later.”
“He wasn’t supposed to do that!” says Laura, stunned. “Stiles was supposed to ask Derek out! I got this whole thing wrong. I should’ve given Derek this Manly Art of Seduction book.” Laura blinks suddenly. “Oh well, actually, that’s for the better.”
“How is that for the better?” frowns Lydia, confused by her changed attitude. “Wasn’t your goal them dating? This is the opposite.”
“No, now that I think about it, I wanted to give Derek a push,” says Laura slowly. “Make sure he’s still there. And he is, right? He even asked Stiles out.” She mulls it over for a second, then shrugs. “Oh well,” she repeats. “It will be fine.”
“You sure are easy-going,” comments Lydia.
Laura shrugs. “I should buy him some ice cream. And keep Stiles away from me. I can’t be held responsible for my actions around him right now.”    
Lydia gives her an odd look. “Math club is about to start so you should probably-“
“Oh please,” says Laura, incredulous. “He won’t come to the math club right after he rejected Derek!”
“It was yesterday.”
“Same chance! He should be at home right now, crying in his pillow, tormenting himself and cursing everything that led him to reject Derek.”
“Um,” says Stiles awkwardly.
“I saw it coming from a mile away but it’s still satisfying,” comments Lydia.
Slowly, Laura turns to eye Stiles coldly up and down. “I can’t believe you’re here.”
“We’re going to talk about tuples?” tries Stiles. “Look, don’t be mad, please. We can still be friends, right? Like, see, I’ll give you my keychain,” he shoves the R2-D2 towards Laura.
“I don’t like Star Wars,” Laura snaps.
Stiles frowns. “But this weekend you-“
“I was watching it because Derek always watches it to feel better.”  
Stiles has enough sense to drop his eyes. 
“So what is it about Derek that’s not good enough for you?”
There’s some mumbling that sums up to, “It’s not like that.”
“Well, tell me how it is, then.”
Stiles tightens his lips. “I didn’t exactly reject him, okay?”
“Oh, did you let him down gently?” asks Laura, scathing. “How kind of you.”
“I – it’s not like that,” he repeats, miserable. “It’s just… how can I tell that I can date him? I mean, sure, I like him but how do I know it’s enough to date? We could be just friends. What’s the threshold? How can I tell my liking is different?” asks Stiles. 
“You’re overthinking it,” mutters Lydia.
Stiles shrugs. “Anyway, I said ‘I don’t know if I can’.”
“And what did Derek say?”
This time, Stiles meets Laura’s eyes. “’I understand’.”
* * *
“I bought ice cream,” says Laura, still in the door. “I’m not sure if they are celebratory or if they are to cheer you up.”
“Me neither,” mutters Derek, already sitting before TV.
“Sucks.”
“Mm.”
They don’t say anything more until the end of A New Hope, when Laura speaks up, “I tried to set you up.”
“Hm?”
“With Stiles,” clarifies Laura. 
Derek rolls his eyes and takes another spoonful of ice cream. “You don’t say.”
“Wait, you knew?”
“Of course I did,” replies Derek, offended. “I just didn’t care. I like Stiles, so.”
In a sudden wave of affection, Laura hugs him. “I’m sorry. I feel like an asshole.” 
She stands up to play The Empire Strikes Back but looks at Derek first. “Can I ask why did you decide to ask him out?”
Derek shrugs and busies himself with the ice cream for a while. “He was talking about dating and stuff. That he needs to find someone, everyone has someone, is Danny still with his boyfriend, so I just. Snapped.”
“You snapped? What does that mean?”
Derek fixes his eyes on the ice cream carton, his cheeks coloring. “I said something like, ‘Just date me if it’s such a problem’.”
“Wow, talk about disappointing confessions,” mutters Laura. At Derek’s glare, she adds, “Sorry! But honestly. Did you say something more at least? Explain?”
Derek makes an odd move, something between trying to hide behind ice cream and a shrug. “Kinda.”
Laura groans. “Well, I’m waiting!”
Derek comes back to watching the ice cream. “I said that I like him.”
“You said why?”
Derek sighs. “Do I have to say that again? Because he’s funny and smart, and, and pretty? You know, the usual shit,” he tries, and fails, in nonchalance. “That he lights up the room. That I feel like I can be myself and it’s okay.”
Laura blinks. “Whoa, dude.”
“Shut up.”
“What did Stiles say to that?”
A tiny, stupid smile appears on Derek’s face. “He, uh. He liked it.”
Laura takes pity on his blush and plays the movie.
They are almost finished when Laura suddenly remembers about Kate and can’t stop thinking about it. When the end credits scrolls down, she can’t hold it anymore.
“There’s something under the sofa,” Laura blurts out.
Derek stops licking his spoon full of twirling caramel chocolate. “Wha-?” 
“Something, uh, something bad.”
“What are you talking about?”
Laura stares at the TV. “I may have found Kate’s note under the sofa.”
Derek tenses beside her but doesn’t say anything. It’s not a good sign, though – Derek will always win the silent wars.
“I didn’t know about her,” says Laura gingerly. “I thought you were still missing Paige or something.”
Derek doesn’t answer.
“Did she – was she – I mean, I kind of got the feeling that she-“
“She didn’t do anything,” says Derek, suddenly angry. “I was an idiot.”
Laura darts a look at him. “How old was she?”
“Twenty-eight.”
Now it’s Laura’s turn to stay quiet. She has no reply to that.
“I was an idiot,” repeats Derek. Laura winces at his tone, the self-hatred evident in a few sounds. “She didn’t do anything but she – she expected. She was waiting and kept talking to me and calling me a ‘child’-“ Derek breaks off, turning to the side.
“What happened?” asks Laura after a moment.
Derek shrugs. “She got bored. Moved out.”
“Can I ask you for something?” asks Laura, fiddling with the blanket.
Derek glances at her.
“I think you should throw it away. The note. Burn it in a ritual fire. Flush in the toilet. I don’t know, something, it’s disturbing that it’s still here.”
She didn’t expect an agreement, at least not an easy one, but Derek nods. “Okay.”
“Oh. Uh, really?”
“Stiles wants me to throw acid on it, too.”
“He knows about Kate?”
Derek shrugs. “Mentioned it.”
That requires some trust, right? Laura’s no expert but she can tell this much. This whole thing starts to look rather serious.
“Why is it here, anyway? If you wanted to hide it, you could’ve found a place in your room.”
“I wanted to remember it.”
“But what if someone found it?”
“What, like you did?”
“Oh. Right.” It makes an odd sense, she thinks. To hide but in a way that someone, sooner or later, would’ve found it. To not be able to say anything oneself, but wait for someone to ask.    
“I think I can stomach Return of the Jedi,” says Laura, looking at the TV. “I expect some help in return if I have some trouble with something. Like Lydia.” Wait, that sounded odd. “Something.”
“You two are like that?”
“Like what?” Laura makes a face at Derek’s raised eyebrows. “Gross, I’m not dating anyone,” she says with a shudder. “Although if I had to, I guess it’d be Lydia.”
“So you’re just friends?”
“We are not just friends. She’s my best friend and… I mean, we are not dating, I don’t even want that, but we aren’t just friends either.”
“Huh.”
“Actually, I’m sure Lydia knows a word for it. I’ll ask her about it.”      
“I kind of thought you were straight?”
“I don’t know what I am,” replies Laura. “I’m not straight because I like Lydia, but I’m not gay. I mean, I know the way Lydia looks at Braeden sometimes at the gym and… I don’t look like that at anyone. So I’m not bi either.”
“Huh. So, like asexual?”
Laura lets out the air. “Label is a label is a label,’ she says instead. “I don’t know. I mean, I guess? Whatever.”
+1. Your Everyday Dinner Date
Laura watches as Stiles eats Derek’s fries and Derek drinks Stiles’ milkshake. They argue about C-3PO, then discuss surface tension of the milkshake as Stiles drips his fry in it and Derek watches in horror but knows better by now than to stop him.
“When do you think they will realize they are dating?”
Lydia shakes her head. “They won’t. Ten years later, they’ll still think of themselves as platonic life partners or something.”
“I was thinking they might go down the friends with benefits way, except they have trouble setting boundaries.”
“Or the fake relationship. Everyone assumes they are dating so they decide to pretend to be dating to break up and have it over with, except they can’t quite just pretend.”
“Oh, I like this one,” Laura grins ad settles back in her seat. “Anyways, my plan totally worked.”
“It was a complete failure,” replies Lydia. “Your goal was to make them date.”
“There were a lot of goals, okay, they’ve changed, and many were achieved.”
“You can’t just change the goals.”
“Of course I can,” shrugs Laura. “It’s my plan.”
“I know I’ve said that a few times already, but I’m still impressed by your carefree attitude and easy-going nature.”
Laura bumps arms with her, smiling. She thinks back to the day she found Kate’s note, recalls heading to Derek’s room. Stiles was there then, wasn’t he? And it was just before Derek asked him out. Now that’d be a shitstorm if Laura went in to ask about Kate. “Good to have you to analyze everything.”
Lydia smiles back and Laura thinks suddenly of the talk she had with Derek. “Hey, is there like a name for when you’re friends, but more? Not like dating. Like, someone important, a friend, but not your… I don’t know.”
Lydia shrugs. “One that I just said. Platonic life partner?”
“Oh, yeah.”
“There’s also QPR. Queerplatonic relationship.”
“Hm. That’d suit us more, right?”
Lydia gives her an amused smile. “Is that your way of asking me out?”
“Is that your way of trying to embarrass me?”
Lydia nods. “Fair. Sorry. But is it?”
“Would you rather I call it a tuple like Stiles?”
Stiles grins. “My tuple rocks.”
“Ugh.”
“Jealous much?”
“Stiles,” Laura makes a face. “This is my brother.”
“Your point?”
Sure, Derek’s smitten, but Stiles is just as bad. 
“So I have different options?” asks Lydia.
“Well, we can always stay friends, so yeah.”
Lydia looks at her, curious. “What about dating?”
“No way.” Laura wrinkles her nose. “I’m crossing this one out.”
“QPR sounds nice.”
Laura smiles, suddenly feeling shy. “Yeah?”
“But tuple sounds better.”
“Jesus, no one asked you, Stiles!”
“Yeah, well, no one asked you to play matchmaker, either.”
Laura narrows her eyes. “I know you just want my muffin but fine. Take it.”
“Thank you.”
“Though, seriously, don’t say I didn’t influence you getting together. I should get a gift, like, a fruit basket. Once a month.”
“Okay,” says Derek.
“Okay?” echoes Stiles, incredulous. “Those are terrible conditions!”
“Well, we are together, right?”
“Gross,” says Laura, staring at Derek in abject horror. “You’re sweet.”
Lydia smiles at Laura, getting her attention again. “Tuple is good, too.”
“Seriously?”
“As long as it’s with you.”
“Romantic shit,” comments Derek. “I approve.”
“This is the last time we have a date together,” hisses Laura.
She knows it’s not, though, and really, she doesn’t mind. She doesn’t even care about the name for her and Lydia’s relationship, as long as it has the space to change and shape what they may have. Even if it’s a tuple.
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izartn · 5 years
Text
Just came back from the cinema with my mom; we’ve watched TROS and well... Gods it was just so so so fucking bad.
Resuming my journey these last years: I’m a super recent fan of Star Wars, I only started liking the franchise when Rogue One came out. I loved it and I decided to give a chance to TFA, and all of the previous films. I rather liked the prequels, and I think they are better than the originals; at least I liked them more. (My mother btw agrees with me. She really liked the lore and worldbuilding and all the mythology and Jedi philosophy there, and how Anakin is affected by it in his descent to the dark side. More interesting than the adventure/action and a bit outdated romance of the originals.) 
When I watched TFA after all of the previous movies (again, the first time I was mehmeh about the movie without proper backstory) I was hooked. I felt like the sequel trilogy was mine, my favourite, and it was because of Rey and Kylo Ren. I sensed a truly intriguing enemies dynamic, maybe some potential for romantic angst? And when I watched TLJ, woa. My first time watching a SW film (RO doesn’t really count, it’s outside the main continuity, although it's like second or third in my SW movie list) at the cinema and I loved it. I couldn’t believe how much I was enjoying, how much better than TFA it was, with the lore the force connection... Even CantoBight and Poe’s arc was somewhat interesting. And the symbolism... It felt like the mangas/animes I love, complex and interesting and conflicted. All the themes about reconciling the old and the new were perfect. And of course, Rey and Kylo/Ben relationship was OwO
TROS is bad because it didn’t make me feel anything. I confess I was a bit spoiled by tumblr. I knew Ben was gonna die, that the Palpatine thing with Rey was... not good, and that Poe-Finn-Rose papers in the movie weren’t good. My mother didn’t know any of this. I tell this because when you know some of the things that are going to happen, it may cheapen the experience but nope. She and I had the same reactions to the movie. A big grand what???? are they really doing this??? why is this happening??? from where did all the people come(you know all of the FO soldiers and officers and all those allies at the end and those weirdos with Palpatine acting as a choir)??? WTF. When people were dying or when our heroes were winning, it didn’t matter because it was the same. Things were happening but they weren’t well done or something because they felt pointless a lot of the time or ooc or disconnected emotionally from the audience. To the point that I (reylo, if you hadn’t noticed my former hints about what made me pay attention to the sequels) didn't care about Ben and Rey scenes because they felt absurd. I mean, I noticed the connection and the obsession and at the start, I was, oh they could do something interesting out of this, but lol nope. It felt repetitive, and when Kylo started talking about Rey being Palpatine’s granddaughter ugh. Like it destroyed a big part of TLJ. 
The fight against Palpatine was absurd. They are this super powerfull and young and not seen in centuries dyad-duo-pair (in Spain I think they called it “el poder de dos”) and Palpatine fucking sucks their power and throws Ben out of a cliff and then Rey has to kill Palpatine alone and dies? and then Ben revives her and also dies? my mother and i were like, whatever it doesn’t matter it’s all absurd. same for all the drama of poe and finn. (btw finn in love with rey, really??? i thought we had buried that in TLJ??? for good???) it was funny at the end though, because my mother was “oh now poe and finn should kiss” and i told her, “well a lot of the fandom also think so” and then rey appeared and the three hugged and she was “well now there is a threesome” and I told her, “well there is also a big part of the fandom who ships those three” and we were laughing silently. The end in tatooine was blegh. by then we weren’t even really paying attention. Rey Skywalker was met with this declaration “maybe if they had let Ben live she could have that last name and future skywalker babies to continue the legacy” which was more sardonic than anything for my part, because the movie was so bad that Ben living would have been just another slightly better meh. It was bad either way by then.
So this is all. I’m sad that this trilogy I had high hopes for has ended so badly. Like my mother said it before me: this was another season 8 of game of thrones and wow. So true. Now I’ll go to AO3 searching for good canon divergence and fix-it fics. This has been my vent. 
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sleepyfan-blog · 5 years
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Ink Please
Discord request fill for @trashydragonartist7
Fandom: undertale aus
Characters and pairing: Ink, Dream, Nightmare, Dreammare
Warnings: lying tw
Word count: 1,687
Summary: Dream and Nightmare are about to cuddle when Ink comes over for a chat.  
Tagslist: @anxiety-is-married-to-depression @angelofthehalfmoon @trainwreck-of-skeletons @hisame-amadashi​ @therandomskelekey @capisnotonfire
"I'm really glad that you came. I've missed you..." Dream hummed softly as he moved over to where his other half was currently sitting on his couch.
"You've been busy ever since Ink struck that truce with Error. I'm convinced that one or both of them are up to something, but from what I've seen, Error's just been sitting in his anti-void, watching Undernovella and stealing chocolate from Underfell timelines when he's hungry. What have you been up to?" Nightmare responded with a sigh, one of his tentacles reaching up and curling around one of Dream's wrist - a subtle hand-hold of sorts. 
"Well... Since Error hasn't been destroying things - and Ink has been unable to help create new timelines... he's been going a little stir-crazy. He's been doodling up a storm and helping to fix up anything that's the slightest bit out of order in timelines that already exist. He's also been talking about fighting you and your friends - I mean your evil minions of evilness. To fix the timelines that you're currently ruling... I've been doing all I can to talk him out of doing that... Not that I've told him that you and I collaborated on making that magical mason jar that Blue and I use when he's being completely insufferable and his form destabilizes, so of course you not only know how to make one, you have one on hand in case he is being a terror or a complete nuisance."  Dream ranted, pacing back and forth in front of his beloved. "Blue and I have been desperately trying to come up with anything and everything to keep him from breaking the truce out of boredom. Core's been trying to help as best as they can."
"Ah well I am grateful that you're trying to keep that nuisance from interfering in the dark timelines that he helped to create, and then abandoned to their miserable storylines because that was what the supposed creators that he supposedly worked alongside in order to -" Nightmare started, though the stopped speaking abruptly as someone banged loudly on the door.
Both of the emotive guardians startled and raced for the door, Dream just a touch faster. He peered through the peephole to check who it was and swore under his breath as he turned, opened the closet door and shoved Nightmare inside of it before closing the door shut, whispering "Hide! And please stay quiet!" Before he opened the door, a bright (and fake) smile appearing on his face as he gestured for the person who was at the door to come in. "Hi Ink - how are you?"
"Gooood! I'm super bored though... I helped Captain Alphys repair her training dummies - as well as the walls of her house, but that didn't take more than like... an hour to fix! She was super impressed by how quickly I was able to fix things, and I ended up sparring with her... and then the entirety of Blue's royal guard, which took several hours as they insisted on fighting me individually - apart from Number One and Number two, and Dogamy and Dogaressa! Both of them are really cute couples. So I came to see you!" Ink responded, bouncing a little bit on the balls of his feet "I"m... Bored and I want to do something, but I can't think of anything that wouldn't get me into trouble. I've already pestered Glitchy until he chased me out of that boring, blank space of his. I mean really - why won't he let me decorate the place a little? The Blue Strings and Red Souls are creepy at best."
Dream paused for a moment, thinking "Uhm... Have you tried talking to Outer, to see if he or his people need anything? Their AU is a lot bigger than most, and I'm sure that there's a lot that you could explore?"
"Meh, I was there when the first Outertale was created - that was a lot of fun to help make, you know? SUch space and grandeur... It was stunning to look at, at first... But I know every star, every planet, every asteroid, and comet. I've played cosmic billiards with Glitchy using asteroid belts and danced on planetary dust rings... And before you suggest going to Outerswap or Outerfell, I've done all of that in multiples of those timelines as well... I just wish that there was something new... I'm so bored." INk complained, flopping down dramatically on Dream's couch, pouting for a couple of moments. He then stared hopefully up at the positive guardian "Do you have any ideas? Any clue as to Nightmare and his gang of evildoers are?"
Dream nearly swallowed his tongue as he froze at the sudden mention of Nightmare - who was hiding and irritated in his closet "Uhh... No? Why do you ask?"
"Well... I can't create anything, as agreed with Glitchy... But we've got to stop whatever evil bullshit that Nightmare is up to... Not that you've ever explained how the hell the two of you know each other or anything like that... I'm sure that there's a very interesting story behind that." Ink responded, walking closer to his long-time companion. He was pretty sure he hasn't been to Dream's timeline in a very long time... Or perhaps ever. There were timelines that were spontaneously created - rare as it is that such things happen that way. 
"I... I've told you before, I don't like to talk about my past - and even if I did tell you, Nightmare would do his best to murder you if you gave so much as a hint about knowing said past..." Dream sputtered in protest. 
"I know that the two of you are connected somehow - your powers and his counterbalance each other in a way that I've never seen before... And the way that you talk about him, I'm quite certain that the two of you lived together in the same timeline for a while... Although I can't imagine what that might have been like... Oooh, maybe I could try to do that? I don't like the way his aura affects me much, but it could be fun pestering him regularly... and since he seems to fancy himself as some sort of tyrant of sorts, we could live amongst his people and sow the seeds of rebellion against him... I wonder if it would be fun to be a rebel leader, or perhaps the guiding whisper in their ears... I don't think that I've done a lot of larger-scale strategy like that, but Blue's had a lot of royal guard training - and is very good at instructing others. With your ability to inspire others, my ability to create things - like weapons for those who can't make their magical attacks, and Blue's knowledge of actual fighting training, I bet that we could do quite a lot to help inspire them!" Ink babbled excitedly, his eye lights shifting shape and colors as the plan started to form in his mind.
"And... Uhm... What if they are content to live under Nightmare's rule?" Dream gently prodded, a small frown appearing on his face "Nightmare usually targets darker timelines - most of those timelines I am unable to physically enter, even in pacifist timelines, due to the extremely low positivity... and from what we have been able to observe, he takes them over, not just through force and intimidation. They may be loyal to him because of what he's done for them."
"Oh... I suppose that you're right about that... But he's disrupting the narratives of their stories, which isn't right!" Ink protested "... Although, you not being able to enter those timelines does throw a major wrench into potential plans... I'll have to think about something else to occupy all of the free time I've got, suddenly. Maybe we'll be able to figure out where Nightmare is going to strike next and chase him off before he can get his tendrils in their minds... Bye for now! I've got some thinking and planning to do. See you later, Dream~!" With that, the creative guardian teleported out of the timeline in a flash of rainbow-colored magic. 
Dream silently counted to twenty before he walked over to where Nightmare was, opening the door "I... I think it's safe for you to come out now."
"Thanks... Is he planning on trying to sow chaos and discord in my empire?" Nightmare asked with a huff as he leaves the closet, scooping up his beloved and snuggling the other close.
"I... I don't think so? Long term and large-scale strategy is not something that Ink is good at for several reasons..." Dream responded.
The negative guardian snorts a little bit "For example the fact that he has the attention span of a gerbil and the memory of a goldfish?"
"Hey! Ink's not that bad - and he does his best to adapt to his memory issues by writing things down... But... He is more than a bit scatterbrained, which wouldn't help him in the whole... Plotting to overthrow a supposedly evil overlord. Speaking of, I plan on thwarting your plans for the rest of the day by cuddling you." Dream responded, moving closer to his beloved, wrapping his arms around the other's waist as he rested his head on one of the other's shoulders.
"Well, your sneaky plans happen to coincide with my evil plots for the day. I plan on trapping you in my arms as we watch movies and eat junk food." Nightmare purred in response as he carried the other over to the couch, settling the both of them down on it, grabbing a blanket and draping it around the two of them. he grabbed the remote and started to flick through the movie selection.
"Ah... Our plots align... How fortuitous for the both of us... Mm... Love you." the positive spirit mumbled as he contentedly nuzzled into his other half.
"And I love you... Are you ready to start the first movie? It's about pirates and curses. Adventure on the high seas." Nightmare asked after a moment, smiling gently. Dream nodded in response, and the movie began to play.
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toxicnotebook · 4 years
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This time on Toxie Yells About Books, FANTASY, FANTASY, and MORE FANTASY. I read most of these pre-social media cutoff, so they're not exactly fresh in my mind. So I'm gonna keep these reviews short and sweet:
Smoke and Shadows, Smoke and Mirrors, & Smoke and Ashes
I'm just gonna lump these together since they're a trilogy. And WHAT a trilogy! I loved this!
To summarize: This is about the adventures of Tony Foster, television studio PA and wizard in training. Also, his ex is a vampire. Specifically, Henry Fitzroy. Who's a vampire in this world. Henry is also a romance author who moonlights (heh heh heh) as a detective. Did I mention that the show the studio is working on is about a vampire detective? And the co-star is Tony's current crush?
Listen. These books are so much fun. They are mildly dated since they are early 00s urban fantasy, but nothing that could be considered a deal breaker. I also deeply appreciated that Tony is kind of a slob and messes up- but not in dumb, plot-convenience ways. He fails in smart ways, for lack of a better term.
I highly recommend this series if you're looking for a queer urban fantasy that isn't YA. It is a spinoff from Tanya Huff's Blood series, but you don't need to read them to enjoy the Smoke trilogy. I sure didn't, although I will be hunting the Blood books down. "Henry Fitzroy as a romance novelist vampire detective" is a hell of a concept!
The Shimmering Door
Despite what that awful, awful cover would lead you to believe, The Shimmering Door is, in fact, the title.
This is going to be a weird recommendation, because it's not based on the quality- although it is a good anthology, with only a few bad ones scattered in. I recommend this book to anyone who's interested in 90s fantasy/sci-fi, because this collection captures all of the trends at the time. Or nearly all of them. It's fascinating to see the genre writing trends of a decade just neatly collected. With a truly terrible cover.
If you see it, pick it up.
In Other Lands
Reviewers said this read like fanfiction, and I would agree- but only a very specific type of fanfiction. You know, the type that summarizes most of the canon work, and only fleshes out the scenes that deviate from canon? The type of fanfic only people who have enjoy the original canon can enjoy, since they already have the backstory?
Except it's an original novel. With no prior work.
If you're interested in a bland, shallow outline of a potential book series with no style or character growth, then by all means pick this up.
(But it really is a series outline. Each chapter summarizes a year of school- and I mean it! The chapters are summaries! I know we're doing the whole Harry Potter Deconstructions trend, but this? This isn't how you do it! If you really wanted to tell the story school year by school year, maybe you should have written multiple books instead of publishing a summary of a series that DOESN'T EXIST! ARGH!)
The Starlit Wood
What an unbelievably uneven and just downright frustrating anthology. Read some reviews and decide for yourself if you want to grab it, but I for one felt the few stories I liked were not worth shifting through the garbage they were buried in.
I realize that's a harsher tone than I usually have, but by the end I downright hated this book. At least Marjorie Liu was at her best.
Undead Girl Gang
I really, really wanted to love this, but about a third of the way through I gave up. There was nothing overtly bad about it, but it felt like I was reading a mediocre B-movie.
If it seems like something you'd like, I'd recommend borrowing it from the library first. I do like this idea- it's a fun idea!- and I do think this is the type of book that most of my followers would love. It just didn't gel with me.
Rags & Bones
After The Starlit Wood, I was so happy to read a quality anthology. Only a few meh ones, and they weren't that bad!  I did like that the theme was old stories in general, not just fairy & folk tales. There were some interesting choices, including a riff on a story that was (at the time) out of print! Pick this one up, it's excellent.
Bordertown
Ahhhh yes, the shared universe that helped create a genre. Listen, I'm extremely biased when it comes to Bordertown- it's one of my favorite worlds co-created by one of my favorite editors. All I will say is you should pick up Welcome to Bordertown, and then decide for yourself if you love it enough to track down the others. Sadly, all of the older collections are out of print.
The Machineries of Joy
I love Bradbury, but boy, was it a mistake to read stories full of 1950s anxiety right when the lockdown started! It's good, it's Ray Bradbury at his prime, but uh. Maybe learn from my mistakes, and wait until things have calmed down a bit before picking this up?
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eldritchsurveys · 4 years
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784.
Have you ever worn those Drunk Goggles? >> I vaguely remember seeing those as like a gag gift at Spencer’s or something, but I’ve never worn any. I’ve been drunk, though, so I think I’ve got the experience of wearing Drunk Goggles well covered.
Which decade before the 90s had the best makeup trends? >> I don’t know anything about makeup trends before the eighties, now that I think about it.
Can you agree to disagree, or usually get upset over conflicting views? >> I can be upset sometimes, especially if the thing being debated is something I have a particular personal investment in. But I have learned how to be upset by myself, and not make it anyone else’s problem. (Which leads to a lot of unresolved feelings, I’ve also learned, but hey.)
Does it bug you when long socks are constantly falling down? >> I don’t wear long socks, and that’s one reason why.
Rodeos – entertaining, or cruel? >> I don’t know anything about rodeos and therefore do not have an opinion.
Why can’t politicians debate politely? >> Because it’s assumed that the general public will not remain engaged unless there’s some sort of drama. ...Honestly, I can see where they get that impression, but it can also be alienating for those of us who aren’t looking for entertainment from our politicians.
Who is the best female rocker? Why? >> Floor Jansen is one of my favourites. So is Skin, from Skunk Anansie.
Can you even taste a difference between Cheez Its and Cheez Nips? >> I don’t know, I’ve not had both of them.
What about between Pepsi and Coke or Sprite and 7Up? >> Yeah, I’ve tasted differences between both of those and I have preferences.
Do you care what kind of toilet paper you use? >> Yes, I care. I don’t like either extreme (too rough or too soft).
What color of roses do you find the prettiest? >> I’ve never given it any consideration.
Which celebrity has the cutest butt? >> I don’t know. But Sarah Snook, who plays Siobhan Roy on Succession, has a pretty eye-catching booty.
Do you still have any decent arcades nearby? >> Not to my knowledge.
After a holiday, do you go to the store to get candy on sale? >> No, but I might get some for Sparrow.
Did Marilyn Monroe look better before or after cosmetic surgery? >> ---
Bullfighters who get gored kind of had it coming, right? >> I mean, yeah.
If you make surveys, do you care what people rate them? >> I don’t make them, but if I did, that wouldn’t be a concern of mine. The only time I’m tempted to make a survey is because there are questions that it surprises me that no one ever asks, and that I’d love to answer myself. So I’d be making it for my benefit, primarily, and if anyone else enjoys it then that’s just icing on an already-good cake.
Have you ever accidentally found porn when looking for something else? >> Yeah, but it doesn’t happen much nowadays.
Ever run into those ‘celebrity lookalike porn’ blogs? >> Long time ago, yeah. You know, before tumblr changed its policy.
If you’re not religious, is the Bible basically just an old collection of short stories? >> My understanding of the Bible is that it’s a collection of laws and writings -- stories, poetry, letters, op-ed pieces (lol). The New Testament in particular seems to be just a bunch of letters appended to four different accounts of one dude’s birth and early life and concluded with a really dramatic callout post for the Roman Empire. I am very fond of this giant mishmosh of opinions and dramatically-recounted stories, tbh, it’s really interesting from both a historical and mythological perspective.
Do you think religious leaders just like to manipulate people? >> Of course.
Why do so many fans with OTP’s insist that their ship is real? Even when the writers (or real people that they ship) tell them it isn’t? >> I don’t know. I’ve never really delved into why that’s so important to a lot of fans, although it does intrigue me. I think it might have something to do with the varieties of ways in which people interact with and understand stories, but I’m not able to articulate exactly what I mean right now, I don’t have the words all organised in my brain and ready to go.
Do you draw fanart of anything? >> No, I don’t draw. I write fan fiction.
Do annoying city kids ever loiter outside your library and harass people? >> I’ve never witnessed any harassment outside of a library around here. That seems more likely to have happened in NYC, though.
Do you like to hang out at your local library? >> Occasionally. I used to basically live at the library when I was in the City, because I was homeless. I think I don’t go to the library as often anymore because of that -- it’s registered in my mind as “the place you go and sit in all day because you can’t go anywhere else” and it disorients me if I do it now.
On that subject, do you like the smell of books? >> Some books.
What’s on your Reading List, so-to-speak, right now? >> I’m between books right now. I’m still debating whether I want to try to finish The Denial of Death or whether I want to give it up for now, and the fact that I’ve been debating that for like a week most likely means that I should give it up. I can always pick it up again at a later date.
Read any great non-fiction books lately? >> Sure.
What do you like on your burger? >> Lettuce, onion, bacon, mustard or bbq sauce, some kind of cheese (preferably pepper jack). Jalapeño peppers can be good too.
What do you NOT like on your burger? >> Mayo, sometimes tomato (I go back and forth, it just depends on the day).
Do you like ‘loose meat’ sandwiches? >> I’m not sure what that is, but the name isn’t too enticing, let me tell you.
Have you ever heard of the restaurant Maid Rite? >> No.
What is the best thing to put in a grilled cheese (other than cheese)? >> I don’t even remember what things I like in a grilled cheese, I haven’t had one in ages. Oh! HopCat sells one that has honey and apple in it and that’s pretty good. I do like “weird” grilled cheeses.
Homemade tomato soup, or just out of a can? >> Not out of a can, that’s for sure. There are some premade ones that I do like, but they’re never canned (usually they’ll come in cartons).
Favorite thing to see in museums? >> I like sci-tech museums, so, that stuff.
Have you ever seen an unwrapped mummy in person? >> No.
What things have people shamed you for? >> The kind of music I like, the kind of people I think are pretty, the way I look, the way I behave/my idiosyncrasies, my emotional responses, my needs... I mean, basically almost anything you can think of.
Do you always reply to private messages? (On any website) >> I usually do.
What device do you seem to always be buying batteries for? >> I don’t think anything I currently use takes disposable batteries.
What’s worse – snow, or all the mud after it melts? >> Definitely the latter.
Are there any 'adult stores’ in your area? >> Probably. Not in this city proper, but like... around. Somewhere.
Have you been inside of them/shopped there before? >> I’ve been to a lot of them in NYC.
Do you watch The Masked Singer? Any theories? >> No.
Favorite Alfred Hitchcock film? >> I don’t have one.
Do you like Funko Pop figurines? >> Meh. The novelty wears off pretty quickly.
If so, do you have any? Which ones would you like to have? >> Yeah, having a few is how I know the novelty wears off pretty quickly, hah. I have two Marvel!Heimdalls (from two different movies), a Roland and a Walter from the Dark Tower movie, Jesse and Cassidy from the Preacher TV show, Lucio and Reaper from Overwatch, and Vivec from The Elder Scrolls. I actually had to go looking in the living room because I’d forgotten I had that many. That’s another few items for the donation / giveaway bin...
Which ones do you think they should make (but haven’t yet)? >> At this point, I think they should stop, lmao. There are so fucking many.
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