#and I saw that one leak on Twitter HES SO PRETTY and his SINGING VOICE IS SO FUCKING PRETTY IM GONNA COMMIT CRIMES

[vioshipping]

Guys silly Billy just got uploaded. I’m going to lose my mind. I’m going to LOSE IT right now

[princessofprocrastination]

Not The Same (GeorgeNotFound)

summary : you put out a song, but it attracted the wrong type of crowd and caused too many misunderstandings.

trigger warnings : threats (including death and doxing), panic attacks, taking of meds. 

"you're THOSE type of fans, huh?" you read the comments on your newest song release.

and that was the start of your downfall.

-

you and your dad really enjoyed singing. at any opportunity you two got, you would be doing a duet.

whether that would be at at a close relative's wedding or your at home karaoke set up, you two knew how to entertain people.

though singing was your passion, you ended up being too busy with school and trying to graduate with a diploma to even think about singing again.

but you swore to make a career of your singing after high school. you just loved it too much.

but then, you didn't go to college for music, which pretty much shocked your parents and your friends since they knew your only passion in life was singing.

but you took a different direction. you still wanted to sing and you were trying your hardest to find a way to make that your career.

someday, anyway. but you needed to have a plan to fall back into in case anything goes wrong.

you were a realist, after all.

so off to college you went.

you spent long hours studying for tests after tests, sat through hours of lectures, did endless amounts of projects.

in the end, it was all worth the wait and fatigue. you graduated top of your class.

you went off to be an intern, clocked in more hours before you could fully go into the next phase of your life.

and after those long hours, you finally made the decision (with the support of your parents) to take a gap year.

but before anyone panics. your gap year was not all fun in games where you took to rest and lay in bed all day.

you took the gap year to see if the music industry fits you. to see if you even had the chance to succeed.

and if it did, you could finally have your dream job. but even if it didn't you were not going to be upset if you needed to fall back onto your backup plan.

in the duration of the gap year, you took voice lessons, and poetry classes for song writing.

and with whatever you have learnt, you took that into writing songs that you felt really relate to your life experiences.

so you spend at least a couple months writing multiple songs.

after almost 2 years, you finally came out with your first song. and it definitely got recognition. more than you thought you'd get, if you were being completely honest.

and that was what pushed you to sit your ass back on your desk to write more, and go into your makeshift studio and make the words into songs.

your parents were ecstatic to hear that you were finally doing the things you loved. and you knew you'd never get this far if it weren't for your family's support.

and so your music journey began.

it was going well for years. you were finally happy doing the one thing you enjoyed doing.

and you definitely think you were good at it. seeing and hearing the positive feedbacks from your family, friends and listeners. 

you felt good. 

but you lost that feeling when you came out with a new single, called ‘fan of you’. 

you spent a while working hard on that song and you felt relieved when it was finally released. it was like a weight was lifted off your shoulders. 

and you weren’t sure how one thing led to another, if you were being honest. at first, you received good feedback for your new songs. you even gained new listeners and your spotify rank rised. 

but then it didn’t anymore. 

your twitter flooded with mentions and your instagram full of tagged pictures and dms by accounts you’ve never heard of. 

but you noticed a similarity with all of the spam. a guy name george. georgenotfound for short.

you being you, you looked into it. and that was when all of the information hit you. and all you had to look up was your name on twitter, and there it was, the longest thread of tweets you have ever seen in your life. 

you took time to read it all, trying to make sure you didn’t miss anything crucial. 

there must be an understanding. you didn’t know this guy name george. you’ve seen his face on pinterest once a while when you scrolled, yes. but you never looked into him. 

this amazing person took their time to gather every bit of information there was about the scandal, which you were grateful for, or else you’d be scouring the internet for hours. 

to summarise what you read, there was this artist by the name of tia jade who came out with a song a few months prior to yours called ‘just a fan.’ 

it was a good song, some say, and you could agree. it was professionally written and produced. but many fans of george found out that the song was about him. 

not just about him, but about her falling in love with him, when she has never met him. and when his fans started to really listen and analyse the song, it got creepier. 

basically, the song was about a fan falling in love with a celebrity/content creator and that they want to know them beyond their persona online. 

but tia had apologised a little after the song came out, saying that she made that song based on a fan liking a content creator, and not about her falling for george. 

but when you read enough of the issue, it definitely did seem like she was making that song to tell her story about falling for george. but she obviously needed an excuse to cover it up. 

hence the apology. 

and then you read about how they analysed your song, too.

they compared your song to tia’s and found it to have similar stories. stories about how a normal girl is falling in love with the man by the name of george, who had millions of followers on all social medias. 

and if you admitted it to yourself, your song did seem to come out that way. especially if your mentality had been there. clearly your song could have been interpreted in many different ways. 

you scrolled to the very bottom of the thread where there was a video of the man himself, george. he was addressing the issue. 

“i don’t know how this happened twice. i thought once was weird enough, but.” he paused, focusing on building something on his screen. 

“having heard of a song being about me again now makes my skin crawl.” he finished. it was short but enough to make his fans understand where he was coming from. 

you scrolled further to see the replies of the thread. you wanted to know what were people saying about it. 

and you definitely regretted your decision to do that. 

threats everywhere. death threats, threats of beating you up, threats of doxing you. god the negative comments were drowned by the one’s that genuinely thought nothing wrong of your song. 

you called you mom. this was the time you needed her advice. you needed to be told what to do. you didn’t want to accidentally trigger people. 

you and her were on the phone for hours. she listened to you cried to her. she heard the painful sobs that came out of your mouth whenever you reminded yourself of what people were calling you on the internet. 

she heard you cry silently on call when you saw your address and phone number being leaked on twitter. 

but even through all of that, you joked around with your mom. “well, this was a hell of a way to be trending.” 

you did what she told you to do. get a new phone number, stay in a hotel for a couple days while you try to settle the raging crowd of georgenotfound fans down. 

in the span of a couple weeks, you got yourself a new number, a new house and a new car. you weren’t taking any chances. 

you told no one besides your mom of the new changes, just to be safe. 

and no, the threats did not cease. at all. these people did not have a life, constantly up in your dms, telling you to jump off a cliff or them hoping that a robber stabs you and leaves you dying. 

you took your time trying to figure out a way to talk to george. or a way to speak out about this. 

you didn’t want to write a half-assed notes app paragraph apologising when- first of all, you had nothing to apologise for and second, you had too much to say to fit it all in a notes app. 

lucky for you, you didn’t need to start your own channel or make a sit down video on your own. 

your recording label had brought up the idea of a documented series about you and how you became a singer about a year ago, and only started filming and posting the episodes a couple months prior on youtube. 

so you took the series to your advantage. you pitched in the idea to your manager, to which she agreed to immediately, knowing that it was best you talked about it now. 

this was how it played out on the perspective of viewers who watched that episode. 

“bless you.” your producer says after you paused your singing in the mic as you stopped to sneeze. 

you gave him a smile and a thumbs up from inside the booth. 

the camera cuts to another clip. 

the cameraman pans as they captured movers coming in and out of your old house, picking up your heavy furniture and boxes into large trucks to move into the new place.

 it cuts again. this time it shows you scrolling on your phone with a focused face while your manager types something vigorously on her computer. 

the camera tries to focus on your phone, and sees that you were on twitter, reading a lot of tweets under your name. 

you exited the app and slide it away, going into youtube next, reading the comments on your song ‘fan of you’. 

you scrolled far, clicking on some of the comments, trying to read the replies to certain comments you saw. 

the camera cuts into a black screen. which then cuts again into a new scene, where you sat on your new kitchen counter talking to your mother, who sat on the chair in front of you. 

your hair was up in a ponytail. a messy one. you were wearing sweatpants and a hoodie that seemed far too big on you, and your feet covered with fluffy socks.

you were nodding to whatever she was saying to you. it was clear your mind was elsewhere as your eyes were unfocused. 

the scene cuts again. 

you were seen on the couch, your legs were tucked into your arms and your head down, body shaking. it was obvious you were crying. 

you were alone, your mother no where to be seen. 

that was the first time the camera caught you crying. 

the scene cuts as you were going to get up from the couch. 

now, you were in the kitchen again, opening the refrigerator to take a water bottle, then walking to your room upstairs. 

the camera follows behind you slowly into your room. 

it hadn’t been the cleanest. there were a couple shirts on the floor, your bed undone, cups on your side table, your laptop open on your desk. 

you were seen opening a drawer, taking out a small white bottle. you unscrewed the bottle and took out 2 pills, popping them in your mouth, drinking water straight away after that to swallow. 

the scene cuts again. 

this time, you were seated on the couch in the studio, the atmosphere dark and quiet. 

your hair was more kept this time, being help up in a clip. 

you were wearing straight jeans and a slightly oversized sweatshirt. you looked more refreshed this time. but it was obvious you hadn’t slept in a while because of your eyes.

your eyes that usually held a lot of happiness and joy turned dull. 

“it’s been a while since i’ve spoken to a camera.” you offered a small smile. your song ‘just a fan’ was playing in the background of the clip. 

the scene cuts again. 

“when i released that song, i was genuinely proud of the work i had done.” you paused for a while. besides the song playing in the background, it was silent. 

“but i guess the joy didn’t last very long.” the scene cuts there. 

it transitioned to a collage of what people were saying about you. it showed clips of people talking about it on youtube. they even showed george talking about it. 

and it cuts again. 

it showed a different clip this time. a clip of your ex boyfriend and you at the beach on a picnic, that was taken by a close friend of yours. 

this was when you were still in college. 

it showed all the fun memories you two made while you were still together. 

it showed a video of him studying in the library, flipping through his papers and scrolling through his laptop. it was clear he was hard at work, not noticing you filming him. 

but then the scene cuts again. and the music turned somber. 

your ex boyfriend’s grave. 

it was the day you were visiting him. you sat down next to his stone, a blanket under you. 

you were just staring at his stone, not moving. 

and it cuts again. 

“he was one of the most driven person i have ever met.” you told the camera. 

“he knew when to be serious and when to have fun.” you looked down in your hands and played with your rings. 

“all he ever talked about was becoming a surgeon. he worked hard in his intern years and continued being passionate through his residency.” you spoke up. 

“people had only nice things to say about him. the only bad thing they would say about him is that he can be pretty uptight sometimes, especially when he was stressed about something.” you laughed a little. 

“i was a huge fan of him, even when we just saw each other in the hallways. he’s just amazing. i’ve always wanted to be just like him.”

“i wanted to write a song about him but i didn’t the song to be sad.” you said. 

“and that was when the song ‘fan of you’ was created. 

the scene cuts there and goes into another. 

you were in the recording booth again, this time, you were singing into the mic. 

the camera pans to your producer and manager dancing and bobbing their heads to the beat. 

the scene cuts, officially ending it with a black screen with ‘the end’ in a fancy white font. 

you busied yourself with writing new songs as your name got trended again on twitter. 

and george has never felt worse about himself ever in his entire life. 

-

he watched the episode as soon as dream sent it to him. 

“you’re an asshole, george.” dream sends to him, along with the link of the video on youtube. 

as the video ends, he decides to read the comments, wondering what it was like down there. 

it was the worse mistake he had ever made in a while. 

but he knew he deserved it. he did assumed it was about him, just like the last song made with a drawing of his glasses as their cover photo on spotify. 

this time, there was genuinely no reason to think that this song was about him, or anyone with a following whatsoever. he just believed what his chat told him. 

sure, there were some familiarity of the character in your song and him, but the world did have 7.6 billion people living on it. 

“so, here i am apologising.” george says to his camera, live. his tone was very sincere and apologetic. 

“this shouldn’t have gotten this far. they shouldn’t have gotten threats at all, let alone death threats. they shouldn’t have woken up to the world knowing where they live and what their phone number is.” 

“and if you’re watching. i sincerely apologise. i clearly was full of myself.” george finishes. ending the live with a small wave. 

and were you watching? hell yes. 

and that was the day the two of you followed each other on instagram. 

he used your songs as his intros of his live, (with your permission, of course.) you showed in your documentary that you were watching whenever he was live or watching his youtube videos. 

and that was the start to a beautiful relationship. 

you sat on the chair, going live. you waved as people started joining. it went from hundreds, to thousands in seconds. 

as you were talking and clicking on your keyboard and mouse, playing a game, you felt arms around your shoulders. 

you smiled, yet continued playing. 

“why are you live on my account?” he laughs. 

you disconnected the headphones so that he could hear what you were hearing. 

“george, you’re being replaced.” dream said on discord. 

george smiles, giving you a kiss on the top of your head. “that was well deserved.” 

[captaincravatthecapricious]

Painful Use of Powers

Tim and Jon are having a friendly discussion that is rather rudely interrupted when Jon accidentally Beholds something. They powers of the eye have faded after the world is back to normal, and it makes Jon very ill.

Cw panic (not detailed), vomiting (he vomits static so like.... not anything gross just weird), food mention, baby shark

This prompt is from the bingo on my tumblr, feel free to send a prompt, a character, and let me know if you want a drawing or a fic!  The starred ones I already have prompts for, the crossed out ones are ones I have already posted.  Bingo by @celosiaa​!

“It’s… been pretty strange.  About half the people I talk to remember everything about… well, you know.  And the other half don’t seem to remember anything at all.  Just remember before… and then remember after.  I have to wonder if it’s a trauma response thing or ….some weird eldritch thing.  But… not actually that curious, if you know what I mean?”  Tim is sitting on the couch next to Jon.  Once upon a time, they maybe would have been flush with each other.  But it had been a long time since they were that comfortable together.  Jon hopes that one day he will feel safe enough to lean on Tim again.  

Jon half swallows a partial laugh.  Not a particularly humorous one, just a huff of air, really.  “I’m curious… of course I am.  I just… try to avoid thinking about it.  Curiosity is a little dangerous for me…  Which is irritating because being a teacher is about Learning as well as teaching.  And apparently it is down to me to try to revive these children from the fatigue of rote memorization without an independent will to learn!”  

“Ha!  You inspiring people to learn!  Are you sure you don’t just give them that glare of yours and tell them when the homework is due after babbling to them for an hour about whatever.  Bet they don’t get a question in edgewise!”

Jon gives Tim that very glare.  And Tim laughs properly.  Which fills Jon’s chest with hope.  He shouldn’t hang on the every positive response he gets from Tim… but he does.  

“Actually I read something funny the other day!  I was on twitter and I found a threat that had a theory that one of those stupid kids songs brought about the Eyepocolypse!  One of those ones that you sing over and over again until every adult that ever met you just wants to clobber you…. I think it was the baby shark one…  Whatever the fuck that is.”

Static fills Jon’s mouth.  Buzzing through the air.  And he Knows the song.  The words.  The many many many versions.  

B̠̼̙͙̘͚̺̓̋̿͑̓͘͟͞ả̶͎̜̙̩̖̋̈́̆̂̚ͅḇ͕͓̘͖̦̫̥͂̊͂̀͂̇̇̂̚͜͢y̟̬̳̱̦̘͖̗͑͑͛̀̚͝͞͞ s̘̠̪̠͎̻̯̰̏͂̒̍̒̏͞ͅẖ̴̢͕̙͕̟̤̯͆̊͂͐̆͜ą̛̙̞͇̹̪̖͕͈͆̽͗̇͋̍͘͘͜r̡̛͍̹̳͉͕̱̝͔̾̒͛͊͐̾̿̕͠ͅķ̯̼̀̉͒͆̌̈͜͢͡ d̷̪͙͓͔̞̗͂̋̀͆͆̕͜͞ơ̵̲̩̦͐͋̊̔̉̑͢͢͠ͅ d̜̳̜̺̣͓̟̿̽̔̽̑͜ͅo̸̙͈͇̠̣͐̿̾̂̏̇̚̚ͅ d̸͍̞̹̫̤̀̑͒́̒͊̔ǫ͚̮̳͇̤̰̦̖̀̋̋͂͌̋͑͢͡ d̲̜̹̤̘̝͖͗̀͑̆̽͢ǫ̴̛̤̤̗̝̯͒͆̂̿̀̐͝ͅ ḍ̶͈͇͖͔̫̯̥̄̃͋̄͌̀̇̑͛͋͟ö̢̖̥̯̹͙̱̓̀͋͗͟͡ d͔̬͚̤̩̯͛̽̏̈͘o̪̼̬̯̮̼͌̈̎̐́̕ b̷̢͙̮̱̹͓̎͑͂̊̋̋͛̊͋̇a̗̩͍̩̲̾̇̄͐̾b̮͇̖̣̭̫͎̂̽̅̾́̄͠ỷ̷͚̘͕̫̲̩̠̮̬͒͆̾̃̅͑̓̄ s̲̳̖̼̩̙̓̿͆̉͛̃͒͝͠͡h̴̡̺̯̮̼̙̜̋̓̋͐̿͢ͅa̴̳̩̲͓̱̞͊͊̓̑̄͢ͅṟ̷̨̛̬͎͕̮̖̣̜̎̌̂̎͢k̟͍̱͍͛̅̉̏̑͑͌͡ͅ d̸̥͓̻̗̩̮͖̓͛̀͒̈̉̀̕͞o̹̭͓͎̤̝͆͂͆̈́͗d̵̙͕̼̖͔̬͚͕̞͂͑̒̀͢͞͝͞o͖͕͉̘̠̹͑̂̂̽̌̋͜ḑ̢̟̙̝͋̈̾͌̆͐͋͂̓̌͜ơ̛͖͎͖̱̳̘̓̽̒̔͌͐̔͒͢ḑ̵͍̱͙̘̙̇́̃͡͞o̴̧͓̼͔̜̣̲̻̔́̓͒͗͂́͜ͅd̨͓͈͎͚͕̳̝̩̿͋̂̔́̔̈̇̓͜ȍ̷͕͙̝͎̙̼̣̃̍̏͘̕͟͞d̴̩̩͖̙̘͕͓̼̯̊̿́̾͋̄͘̚͞ŏ̞̤͉̱̝̯̔̄̅͊̑͟ w̴̰̥̱̲̦̤̘̠̑̅̉̓̀͢ę̶̛̬̗̗͓͍̟̏̀̓͗͑͢ṇ̙̟̳̅͑̾͆̈́̀͋͢͞t̵̠̯̫̙̘̺̳͋̋̍͒͂̍̌̐̋ f̸̻̭̫͚̮͐̑̉̄̍̓̂͝ȯ̢̨͔͍̥̲̌̅̋̂͋r̢͔̥͈͎̭͔̼̹̀̿̀̂̊̈́̊͜͠ ả̢̡̛͉̙͓͎̩̈̈̑̇̒͢ͅ ş̺̦͍̣̬͔̭̲̅̓͑̿͗̍ͅw̺̺͉͙̩͚̻̣̜̪̿̍̽͒̎̀̚͝í̢̺̥̩͖̹̣͖͚̈́̿̐̏͜m̶̜̯̺͙̯͒̔̈́̍͞͡͠ d̶̢̨̡̛͓̖̥̱̩̹͊͒̔̽̈̎̽̚ò̤̤̪͎͔̺̽̍̋̅̆̔͠d̳͎̥̟̺̰̰̘̿̌̐́̄̌ơ͔̣̝̱̪̟̪̑̒̿̑͆̂̓̍̃d̢͎͖͖̭͓̭́̌̇̊̇̀͗͛ơ̴͖͓̤̝̘̯͓̐̊̓̾̕͜d̷̤̺̫̙̠̜̬̈̆͐̽̚͟ő͕͚͖̳͙̭̞̜̓̊͊͘͘d̴͈̲̰̬̘́̈́̓̚͠ȍ̶̠͙̜͖͉̱̥̄́͛͌̌̈͟d̳̜̮͓̀̓͒̈̌̅͌͢o̺͕̙̺͔̫̍̾̾̍͊

.

The knowledge floods his senses.  Too many words.  Too many songs.  And he can’t stop it until he has experiences every annoying children’s song and rhyme and poem at once and he can’t take any of it in and he can’t thinkcantthinkcantthinkcantthinktoomanywordstoomanytoomany 

sharksharksharksharksharksharksharksharksharksharksharksharksharksharksharksharksharksharksharksharksharksharksharksharksharksharksharksharksharksharksharksharksharksharkDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDoDo

The static crackles in the air, and Jon’s vision goes dark.  

Jon wakes up and throws up.  Or would, if his insides hadn’t turned to static.  As it stands, static floods his mouth and echos around the bin that has been shoved hastily in front of his face.  

He thinks vaguely this must be an unpleasant experience for whoever is guiding him upright and holding back his hair.  

Even so, it is miserable for him.  

This is one of the least pleasant experiences of his life.  Which is saying something.  

It hurts.  It feels like he is being turned inside out and his head sawed in two.  

Once his body is done, his eyes are leaking static is well and he slumps further, head still in the bin, breathing hard.  He groans, pitifully.  

He allows himself a minute.  A minute to try to process the information overload that sent him into this state.  To try to feel more real and less like a manifestation of buzzing energy.  

He can’t drag his eyes open.  He doesn’t even want to try.  

Then he remembers Tim.  

Tim who is almost certainly the one rubbing his back.  

Tim who just witnessed Jon Behold something.  

Tim who thinks Jon has this under control.  

Jon is supposed to have this under control.  

But does he?  Does he really?  Because this Does happen.  Not too often anymore, but it does.  Jon can’t always.  

Sometimes a weak compulsion threads through his words.  Sometimes he something slips through into his subconscious.  And sometimes, the floodgates open like they just did, and Jon’s body is not equipped to deal with that now, if it ever even was.  (Which it wasn’t.  He remembers lying on his office floor… sick and shivering for hours before Basira found him at his desk, having finally found the strength to stand, plagued by a raging headache.)  

Tim wasn’t supposed to see that he is still like this… this… monstrousness that hasn’t gone away.  It hasn’t.  Just a bit weaker.  Still out of control and he should have this under control by now!  It’s been years!  

And he can’t think anymore because it hurts too much, and even the gentle hand on his back is too much like hitting.  Like scratching.  And he knows it is just oversensitive skin and he knows that touch is fine and grounding and good, but his brain can’t tell the difference anymore.  Not after years of hurt have been visibly pressed into his skin.  And not when merely existing is rending his head in two.  

He is breathing hard with a solid band of panic crushing his lungs.  And he’s gagging around more static.  And static is streaming down his face and he can’t let Tim see him like this.  he can’t.  He can’t!  He doesn’t want to lose Tim again.  He can’t do it again!  Not when things are so close to good that it hurts.  

He tries to get up.  To hide, but it sends him retching again.  

Tim is alarmed.  Not about Jon’s use of powers.  He’s… something close to okay with that.  Well… not Okay okay with it.  But it’s still… just Jon.  It doesn’t happen often.  And Martin warned him Long before allowing them near one another, the second conversation they had after Tim ran into him in the grocery store and had to go through the awkward business of ‘yes I’m alive, sorry I didn’t say anything, also here’s Sasha who you thought was dead.  What do you mean you almost got yourself killed because you were left with nothing to live for?’  That had been…. a conversation to remember.  

In any case, Tim knows that Jon isn’t entirely human.  Mostly human, at this point.  But… not entirely.  Sometimes things like this happen, although Martin hadn’t said anything about….. all the static.  Something about ink?  Something about some minor compulsion.  And that Jon is… not cagey about it… but skittish.  That he still expects to be punished for this thing that he clearly can’t entirely control.  He knows that Jon occasionally Knows things on purpose and gives himself migraines.  Much to Martin’s worry.  But accidentally Beholding… well it looks worse than a migraine to Tim.  This looks painful, and like it’s quickly devolving into a panic attack.  

Which… Tim has a sinking feeling is because he is there.  This would be…. the third one he’s caused.  At least that he knows of.  

There was the time that Jon was under the weather and compelled him by mistake.  There was the time when he’d finally gotten comfortable around Jon again and had started joking and something in the tone of his voice or the volume had sent Jon into a messy spiral.  And now this.  He’s been so careful.  He wants his friend back.  And they were finally getting somewhere with easy visits without Martin moderating.  Finally.  

And now Jon is sick and hurting and  afraid and Tim is probably just making it worse.  

Jon flinches away from his hands with a whimper, and his theory is strengthened.  

He stops.  Timothy Stoker takes consent very seriously.  “Do you want me to let you go?  Can you sit on your own?”  

Jon whines again, forehead resting on the edge of the bin.  Dreadfully pale and face crackling with a static that Tim guesses to be sweat or tears… possibly both.  

He would absolutely let go of Jon if he was sure he could safely do so, but… Jon looks as if he might just topple over as it is.  Best not to disturb him too much.  And if he looks uncomfortable with the arrangement, then Tim will try to fix it.  However he can.  

Until then, he ought to call Martin.  But he can’t get up without dislodging an unsteady Jon.  And Jon doesn’t look up for sitting in on a conversation.  

He sends a text instead.  

There’s been an incident.  We’re okay, but if you could come back here soon… Please come back soon.  

Jon cries.  And so does Tim.  Softly.  Briefly.  So many steps they have taken together, and there is still a journey before them.  

Martin’s home.  Jon would cry with relief if he wasn’t already crying.  Finally real tears instead of trails of static.  Every time he’s tried to move has made him sick.  He eventually gives up and leans against Tim.  Shivering slightly.  He wishes he could get some painkillers, but…. he can’t even sit up.  Not even far enough to let Tim get up.  

He did find it in himself to weakly sign for Tim to wrap an arm around him.  

It’s grounding.  And solid.  And warm.  And real.  

But now Martin is here.  Speaking in low tones to Tim.  Hands on his face.  Jon leaning into Martin’s warmth.  Martin wiping his damp face with a warm flannel.  

“Hey, sweetheart.  Jon, what happened?”  Martin.

Jon doesn’t want to open his mouth.  Insides still unhappy static.  He signs, “Baby Shark.”

Tim chokes on a laugh.  

It jostles Jon, which causes him to groan.  But… but.  A laugh is good.  It isn’t derisive.  It’s… just warm.  And very Tim, as he once was when they were together.  As he is, now.  

Tim stays for dinner.  It’s takeout.  And while Jon is still queasy, he manages a little bit of soup before falling asleep.  Still leaning on Tim, Martin cradling his legs.  

[fyexo]

200315 K-Pop Supergroup SuperM On Friendship, Fans And Fun Times

As the South Korean pop group embark on their first-ever world tour, we go backstage with band members Baekhyun, Taemin, Kai, Taeyong, Ten, Lucas and Mark to talk about their latest album.

There’s a cacophony coming from behind a door, backstage at their first world tour. SuperM are recording greetings for fans and media. “Hi, we are…” begins Baekhyun, the group’s unofficial-official leader. The six other members cheerfully join in… “SuperM!” The cadence isn’t quite right and Baekhyun’s cackle, as distinctive as his singing voice, rises above the boyish shouts of genial failure. They repeat the line so many times it seems plausible that if you ever woke one of them abruptly, they’d sit up and shout the phrase automatically.

SuperM are a bona fide K-pop supergroup, and like all supergroups, they’re not running to schedule. “We have to halve your time,” whispers a PR apologetically. SuperM’s greetings and gleaming smiles are casual and friendly, but little can distract from the extraordinary human wall of talent they present. Twenty-six-year-old Taemin, SHINee’s vocalist and legendary performer, sits between EXO’s Baekhyun, 27, and main dancer Kai, 26. Perched on a sofa behind them are members of SM Entertainment’s newer groups: WayV’s Ten, 24, and Lucas, 21, and NCT’s rappers Mark, 20, and Taeyong, 24.

From South Korea to the world

Last October, SuperM’s eponymous first EP entered the US album chart at number one, the cherry on top of a media blitz that included shutting down LA’s Vine Street to perform outside Capitol Records. They’re only the second South Korean group to have reached the top spot (BTS being the first), but that was always part of the goal — their record label, SM Entertainment, put the US in the crosshairs and SuperM was going to be its golden bullet. But although NCT 127 (an NCT sub-unit) have been promoting themselves in the US, it’s a first time for Taemin, Baekhyun and Kai.

“It felt like re-debuting,” Taemin says. “The fact that we’re targeting different audiences felt like a new challenge we were all taking on.” With bleached blond hair and a delicate build that belies a robust physical strength, it’s not just Taemin’s seniority as an artist in SuperM’s ranks that makes everyone listen intently — his manner is assertive without being overbearing, and his earnestness has you believe you’re not just one more addition to a blurry, months-long line of interviewers. “We’ve grown together, we’ve gained confidence and it gets easier as we see the fans’ reactions. It’s fun; it’s working.”

It’s no secret that, in part, SuperM had their work cut out for them. Their union had Twitter fan groups up in arms, with calls for SM Entertainment to allow the members to concentrate on their respective groups or solo careers. When a hazy, distorted sliver of their debut single leaked, naysayers predicted a flop.

The single, Jopping, Taemin points out, showcases the label’s SM Performance dance project and in its fully remixed, remastered glory, it was a swaggering, audacious and riff-heavy bop that took itself as seriously as it didn’t. It was there to be danced to and though much of it was in English, its titanium-strong hooks refused to pander to western trends. SuperM’s style recalls the years before intricate concepts (such as EXO’s alien superpower origins story) came to cradle much of current K-pop. The album might revel in its layers of production, but it’s refreshingly escapist, and shifted 164,000 physical copies in its first week.

Breaking the stage, one continent at a time

With all this in mind, it’s unsurprising that one of Baekhyun’s goals is “for people to say only good things about SuperM”. Their fans, who’ve filled arenas in the US, Mexico and Europe, are noisily adoring and with good reason — SuperM’s stage show is compelling. Theirs is a punishing schedule — mid-interview, Taeyong is unable to smother an enormous yawn — but on stage, their energy lights up the cavernous space.

Choreographed numbers, such as I Can’t Stand The Rain, are mighty and aggressive. With You (a loose, routine-less chance to interact with the audience) and No Manners, where they slither around a simple elevated set, seem easy to emulate, but are completely reliant on mesmerising presence and cohesion. “There are so many different stages and performances at a SuperM concert,” says Taeyong, more matter-of-fact than boastful. “You’ll never get to see this chemistry or these members performing together [anywhere else].” Taemin adds: “The fans have shown so much support, and it pushes me to want to perform to even bigger audiences on an even larger scale.”

K-pop is relentlessly accused of being manufactured, with its performers supposedly just going through the motions, but SuperM subvert this idea with a warm spontaneity and rakishness on and off stage. They’re each other’s most fervent cheerleaders and bearers of the most merciless roasts — the atmosphere is more akin to a lads’ holiday than a multimillion-dollar music project. “Thank you for noticing that,” laughs Baekhyun, who puts it down to a “natural chemistry. If you saw us [just hanging out] you would get even more of that feeling!”

Sailing pop’s high seas

Mark, who was born in Canada — funny, and wise beyond his years — likens SuperM to a ship. “When I practised with these guys, the energy I absorbed was actually very interesting,” he says. “The knowledge and experience is incomparable to anything we [younger members] have. It’s not a competition or anything — it’s something we learn from.

“Taemin would be the ship’s wheel,” he continues, happily developing his theme. “He knows the direction we want to go in. The EXO-hyungs [older males] have a lot of talent — they’d be the sail and that’s where we get the boost. NCT and WayV, we’re like the hull, holding the talent [together]. That’s a pretty cool ship,” Mark grins. SuperM’s concert visuals might well be having a subliminal effect on Mark: during Jopping, a pirate ship bobs across the huge screen behind them.

Thailand-born Ten, known for his quick wit, adds: “Taemin sees stuff very differently to us. [He thinks about] what kind of make-up or uniform [costume] we need to wear, and we’ve never thought about that before.”

The hyungs get a sense of vitality from their younger bandmates, although Taemin and Baekhyun scrunch their faces at the prospect of being old enough to need a top-up. “They’re the foundation for whenever we feel tired,” Baekhyun laughs.

Secret names

Off the back of touring, SuperM have developed a number of in-jokes and nicknames that, when asked about them, sets them off. “Lucas-tonkotsu?” mumbles Taemin with a sidelong smile, making Lucas — all long legs and big grin — double over. Mark slowly chants “B-A-E-K-hyung” which Baekhyun, the corners of his mouth curving upwards, tries to ignore. “There are secret names we like to call each other, but we want them to remain within the group,” he says. Mark nods, “Yeah, they’re just for us.”

Baekhyun raises his eyebrows and looks at his bandmates. “I love you!” he sing-songs with a smirk. Groans and laughter are the only replies.

SuperM — The 1st Mini Album is out now

source: Taylor Glasby @ Vogue

[dailyexo]

[INTERVIEW] Baekhyun, Kai - 200314 Vogue: “K-Pop Supergroup SuperM On Friendship, Fans And Fun Times”

"As the South Korean pop group embark on their first-ever world tour, we go backstage with band members Baekhyun, Taemin, Kai, Taeyong, Ten, Lucas and Mark to talk about their latest album.

There’s a cacophony coming from behind a door, backstage at their first world tour. SuperM are recording greetings for fans and media. “Hi, we are…” begins Baekhyun, the group’s unofficial-official leader. The six other members cheerfully join in… “SuperM!” The cadence isn’t quite right and Baekhyun’s cackle, as distinctive as his singing voice, rises above the boyish shouts of genial failure. They repeat the line so many times it seems plausible that if you ever woke one of them abruptly, they’d sit up and shout the phrase automatically.

SuperM are a bona fide K-pop supergroup, and like all supergroups, they’re not running to schedule. “We have to halve your time,” whispers a PR apologetically. SuperM’s greetings and gleaming smiles are casual and friendly, but little can distract from the extraordinary human wall of talent they present. Twenty-six-year-old Taemin, SHINee’s vocalist and legendary performer, sits between EXO’s Baekhyun, 27, and main dancer Kai, 26. Perched on a sofa behind them are members of SM Entertainment’s newer groups: WayV’s Ten, 24, and Lucas, 21, and NCT’s rappers Mark, 20, and Taeyong, 24.

From South Korea to the world

Last October, SuperM’s eponymous first EP entered the US album chart at number one, the cherry on top of a media blitz that included shutting down LA’s Vine Street to perform outside Capitol Records. They’re only the second South Korean group to have reached the top spot, but that was always part of the goal — their record label, SM Entertainment, put the US in the crosshairs and SuperM was going to be its golden bullet. But although NCT 127 (an NCT sub-unit) have been promoting themselves in the US, it’s the first time for Taemin, Baekhyun and Kai.

“It felt like re-debuting,” Taemin says. “The fact that we’re targeting different audiences felt like a new challenge we were all taking on.” With bleached blond hair and a delicate build that belies a robust physical strength, it’s not just Taemin’s seniority as an artist in SuperM’s ranks that makes everyone listen intently — his manner is assertive without being overbearing, and his earnestness has you believe you’re not just one more addition to a blurry, months-long line of interviewers. “We’ve grown together, we’ve gained confidence and it gets easier as we see the fans’ reactions. It’s fun; it’s working.”

It’s no secret that, in part, SuperM had their work cut out for them. Their union had Twitter fan groups up in arms, with calls for SM Entertainment to allow the members to concentrate on their respective groups or solo careers. When a hazy, distorted sliver of their debut single leaked, naysayers predicted a flop.

The single, Jopping, Taemin points out, showcases the label’s SM Performance dance project and in its fully remixed, remastered glory, it was a swaggering, audacious and riff-heavy bop that took itself as seriously as it didn’t. It was there to be danced to and though much of it was in English, its titanium-strong hooks refused to pander to western trends. SuperM’s style recalls the years before intricate concepts (such as EXO’s alien superpower origins story) came to cradle much of current K-pop. The album might revel in its layers of production, but it’s refreshingly escapist, and shifted 164,000 physical copies in its first week.

Breaking the stage, one continent at a time

With all this in mind, it’s unsurprising that one of Baekhyun’s goals is “for people to say only good things about SuperM”. Their fans, who’ve filled arenas in the US, Mexico and Europe, are noisily adoring and with good reason — SuperM’s stage show is compelling. Theirs is a punishing schedule — mid-interview, Taeyong is unable to smother an enormous yawn — but on stage, their energy lights up the cavernous space.

Choreographed numbers, such as I Can’t Stand The Rain, are mighty and aggressive. With You (a loose, routine-less chance to interact with the audience) and No Manners, where they slither around a simple elevated set, seem easy to emulate, but are completely reliant on mesmerising presence and cohesion. “There are so many different stages and performances at a SuperM concert,” says Taeyong, more matter-of-fact than boastful. “You’ll never get to see this chemistry or these members performing together [anywhere else].” Taemin adds: “The fans have shown so much support, and it pushes me to want to perform to even bigger audiences on an even larger scale.”

K-pop is relentlessly accused of being manufactured, with its performers supposedly just going through the motions, but SuperM subvert this idea with a warm spontaneity and rakishness on and off stage. They’re each other’s most fervent cheerleaders and bearers of the most merciless roasts — the atmosphere is more akin to a lads’ holiday than a multimillion-dollar music project. “Thank you for noticing that,” laughs Baekhyun, who puts it down to a “natural chemistry. If you saw us [just hanging out] you would get even more of that feeling!”"

Sailing pop’s high seas

Mark, who was born in Canada — funny, and wise beyond his years — likens SuperM to a ship. “When I practised with these guys, the energy I absorbed was actually very interesting,” he says. “The knowledge and experience is incomparable to anything we [younger members] have. It’s not a competition or anything — it’s something we learn from.

“Taemin would be the ship’s wheel,” he continues, happily developing his theme. “He knows the direction we want to go in. The EXO-hyungs [older males] have a lot of talent — they’d be the sail and that’s where we get the boost. NCT and WayV, we’re like the hull, holding the talent [together]. That’s a pretty cool ship,” Mark grins. SuperM’s concert visuals might well be having a subliminal effect on Mark: during Jopping, a pirate ship bobs across the huge screen behind them.

Thailand-born Ten, known for his quick wit, adds: “Taemin sees stuff very differently to us. [He thinks about] what kind of make-up or uniform [costume] we need to wear, and we’ve never thought about that before.”

The hyungs get a sense of vitality from their younger bandmates, although Taemin and Baekhyun scrunch their faces at the prospect of being old enough to need a top-up. “They’re the foundation for whenever we feel tired,” Baekhyun laughs.

Secret names

Off the back of touring, SuperM have developed a number of in-jokes and nicknames that, when asked about them, sets them off. “Lucas-tonkotsu?” mumbles Taemin with a sidelong smile, making Lucas — all long legs and big grin — double over. Mark slowly chants “B-A-E-K-hyung” which Baekhyun, the corners of his mouth curving upwards, tries to ignore. “There are secret names we like to call each other, but we want them to remain within the group,” he says. Mark nods, “Yeah, they’re just for us.”

Baekhyun raises his eyebrows and looks at his bandmates. “I love you!” he sing-songs with a smirk. Groans and laughter are the only replies.

Photo links: 1, 2, 3

Credit: Vogue.

[ahtohallan-calling]

chapter 15 of don’t read the last page is here!

masterpost

[kristanna / m / multichap / modern au with actress!anna and vetstudent!kristoff]

"I just want to go back to sleep," she said; really she wanted to go back to this summer, when she had so hated the long stretches of empty days and taken for granted the seemingly endless hours they had spent together laughing and talking and kissing each other senseless and never once imagining how hard it was going to be.

"Then sleep, baby," Kristoff murmured, and by the way his arms tightened around her she knew he wanted the same.

chapter 15: new year

"Why is anyone calling me at eight in the morning on New Year's?"

She burrowed deeper under the blankets, squeezing her eyes shut and willing the whole damn world to just shut up. She hadn’t thought she’d had much to drink last night, but her head ached, and her mouth was fuzzy, and they had never made it to the shower so now she was pretty sure there was lipstick and mascara smeared all over her face, but more importantly this was their day, and she didn’t want anything to ruin it.

"It's not just anyone, baby, that's Sam's ringtone," Kristoff said, his voice still rough with sleep, as he gently rubbed a circle between her shoulder blades.

She ignored it anyway. Anything definitely included overeager calls from her agent who was still somewhat giddy at her newfound fame. Instead she focused her attention on Kristoff’s bare chest, pressing little kisses to it and smiling faintly when she felt his heartbeat accelerate beneath her touch.

Eventually, the phone went silent, but she didn't even have time to sigh in relief before it started ringing again. Kristoff pulled away from her just enough to get the phone and set it on the bed, accepting the call. "Hey, Sam. You're on speaker."

"Hey, kid. And hey to Anna, too. I'm sorry to call this early, wish I wasn't up, either."

"Just tell me what it is, Sam," Anna said, reluctantly turning over so her voice wouldn't be muffled against Kristoff's skin. "So we can all get it over with and get back to bed."

"Good news or bad news?"

"Good first."

"You've gained a thousand new Twitter followers in the last...uh...half hour? And everyone's excited to see you really can sing."

For a moment she was confused; how were those connected, and why did he need to tell her right now?

And then it hit her.

"Oh, god, Sam," she said, her voice already shaking. "But Hans said…"

"Someone didn't listen. They filmed the two of you singing 'Auld Lang Syne'. And, uh...people already noticed you guys matched each other. And the confetti. And came to...conclusions."

Kristoff stiffened beside her. "Can't you get it taken down?" he asked.

"Three different sources leaked it. And it's been reported on already. It happened so fast-- Lena found out half an hour after the first tweet, and by then I was already fielding interview requests for you. By the time we got all the official sources to delete it…"

"A bunch of random people will have already saved it," Anna said, her voice tight. "So it's here to stay."

Sam sighed. "This is on me and Lena, kiddo. Should've been more on top of this, shouldn't have encouraged you so much to go. I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault," Anna said, her vision quickly growing blurry.

"How do you want to handle this?"

"I don't know, Sam."

"I know it's hard, but the sooner we--"

"I said I don't know," she snapped.

For a moment there was only silence. When Sam spoke again, his voice was soft. "I'm sorry, Anna. Let me talk to Lena. We'll come up with a couple of options. You call me later when you're ready, okay?"

She didn't respond. After a moment, Kristoff cleared his throat. "She says okay. Thanks, Sam."

He hung up the phone and tossed it across the room, where it landed in the laundry basket. "Hole in one," Anna said weakly, and burst into tears.

He didn't speak; he just put his arms around her as she sobbed into her hands, holding her close against his chest. "One fucking day," she choked out. "I wanted one fucking day to just be us again."

"I know," he murmured, pressing a kiss to her temple.

"I don't know what to do. Like, where to even start, I--"

She trailed off, too confused and overwhelmed to begin to put it all into words. Instead she turned over in Kristoff's embrace to tuck her chin over his shoulder, inhaling the familiar warm scent of him, and fought to hold back a fresh wave of tears.

"I just want to go back to sleep," she said; really she wanted to go back to this summer, when she had so hated the long stretches of empty days and taken for granted the seemingly endless hours they had spent together laughing and talking and kissing each other senseless and never once imagining how hard it was going to be.

"Then sleep, baby," Kristoff murmured, and by the way his arms tightened around her she knew he wanted the same.

---

She hadn’t meant to actually fall asleep, had intended to lay there all morning with him, letting herself be comforted even though they both already knew the fallout from this would hurt him, too. But suddenly she was blinking awake, her head pounding and her mouth dry, as Kristoff carefully wriggled out from beneath her; somehow he had ended up on his back with her curled around and over his side, her head pillowed on his chest.

“Kris?”

“Go back to sleep,” he said softly as he slid out of bed. “I’ll be right back.”

“No, my head hurts,” she mumbled, rubbing at her eyes as she followed him. “I wanna drink some water.”

“Okay. I’m gonna take a shower.”

For a moment she felt nothing but contentment as she watched him stretch, the muscles in his back rippling with the movement, and amble out of the room and down the hall wearing nothing but low-slung sweatpants. She considered following after him and surprising him in the shower-- she really did want to get all the hairspray out, and there was room for both of them, and he surely wouldn’t mind, and then she remembered the morning’s phone call and felt a cold wave of dread wash over her, tears already pricking at the back of her eyes.

How many more times had the video been shared? How many more people had seen it and wondered if she and Hans were dating? How many people had already been calling Lena asking for a comment on her relationship status?

Now she didn’t feel like crying; she felt like throwing up. What had she gotten Kristoff into? She didn’t particularly care about what people thought about her, so long as they still liked her, but he hadn’t asked for any of this, had never done anything but support her, and now he was faced with either becoming a public figure or watching the whole world believe she was with someone else. And he started clinicals next week, and she was going to be insanely busy as they rushed to get as much done as possible before going to Russia, and already they had both been so stressed and--

“Pull yourself together, Anna,” she muttered under her breath, pinching her arm to force herself back into the present moment. “Throwing a pity party won’t fix it.”

She retrieved her discarded phone from the hamper and shot off a quick text to Sam, asking if they could do a conference Skype call in half an hour. And Kristoff will be in on it if he wants, she added in a followup message. He’s part of this too.

Sure, came the reply only a couple of minutes later. Lena and I think we have some ideas worked out. And of course, no problem.

“Kris?” she called, padding down the hall and slipping into the bathroom. “We’re gonna do a video conference at ten-thirty. I told Sam you’ll be there. If you want to, I mean.”

He pulled aside the shower curtain, shampoo still in his hair. “Of course.”

He said it so easily, without any hesitation, that she couldn’t help but kiss him. He grinned when she pulled away and asked, “Care to join me?”

“We’ll be late for the call then.”

“So we’ll just kiss. And you can make sure I don’t have any more lipstick on my back.”

“Well. When you put it that way…”

They were only five minutes late, both of them still rosy-cheeked and damp as they set the laptop on the kitchen table and crowded next to each other. Anna was still grinning when the dial tone began, but the moment she saw Sam and Lena’s somber expressions her smile swirled away as if it had been swept down the drain with the bubbles.

“Sam and I have been talking all morning. We’ve put together three options,” Lena said without preamble. “Option one, you come out and tell people about your relationship with Kristoff. Option two, you say nothing and hope that people forget about this. Which they won’t unless someone else does something juicier, but it is an option. And option three...we lean into this. Drop some hints that you and Westergaard actually are dating. I can get in touch with his people, see if they want to set up an arrangement, the whole shebang.”

Anna felt her cheeks grow hot. “Why would I ever do that?”

“You’ve gained ten thousand followers between Twitter and Instagram just this morning, while most of the world is still in bed hungover. He’s a huge star, and doing that would raise your profile and the movie’s. It’d be a huge boost to your career, and it wouldn’t have to be forever.”

Anna pressed her lips into a thin line, not trusting herself to speak. Sam, looking torn himself, said, “It’s up to you, kiddo. But we can make lemons outta lemonade.”

“I’m not going to cheat on my boyfriend.”

“It’s not cheating,” Lena cut in, “it’s acting. Same as you kissing him onscreen.”

“It’s different, it’s--”

“I think she should do it,” Kristoff said suddenly. 

For the second time that morning, Anna thought she was going to be sick. She didn’t dare to look at him; instead she kept her gaze just above the top part of the screen, focusing intently on the cactus they had bought last week to keep in the living room. “Because I know you want a pet someday,” he had told her, “but we gotta make sure we’re responsible enough for one, and I figured that’s a good place to start, and yes, before you ask, we can name it.”

Sam was saying something, but she couldn’t hear him over the roaring in her ears. Kris responded, and from the corner of her eye, she saw him nod. “Okay, then,” Lena said, “Anna, I can call his team tonight if you--”

“No!” Anna said, horrified that any of them were even considering it. “I’m not-- Jesus fucking Christ, I could never just-- just do that…”

“Hang on,” Kristoff said, turning off their video and audio and muting the computer before reaching over to clasp her hands. “Anna, baby…”

His eyes were too soft, too full of love; that made it worse, somehow, that he thought this was the right way to love her. “I don’t ever want to hold back your career. We’ll still know the truth, right? That’s what’s important.”

She shook her head fiercely. “No. I-- no. It just feels wrong, Kris. I hate keeping us secret, but I’d hate just blatantly lying about it even more. And I don’t want to boost my career like this, with something just...made-up. And-- fuck, when you weren’t there I realized you and Honey were right, and I...god. I don’t care if that’s the best option. I don’t want to take it.”

He squeezed her hands. “Okay.”

“Okay?” “Yeah. Do you...do you want to go public then?”

“Do you?”

His voice was unsure. “I...can, if you want me to. I’ll just...you know, warn the clinic I’m working with in case of--”

“No. Nope. Don’t say anything else.”

“Anna--”

It was her turn to squeeze his hands. “Be one hundred percent honest with me right now, Kristoff. This isn’t just about me. What do you want?”

She held his gaze, watched as a sadness crept into his eyes and knew that he was going to break her heart and put it back together in one fell swoop. “You. Even if I have to share you with the world. Whatever that means, whatever I have to do, I just...I want to share a life with you, Anna. My whole life, actually, if we can swing it. And maybe someday I’ll be able to be what you need and be able to be in the spotlight with you and--”

“Kris, baby, I--” 

She was starting to tear up again. “You’re already what I need. And I-- I want the same thing, even if you’re never ready to go public. And I love you so much, and I’m so sorry that any of this is even on the table.”

He leaned forward to press his forehead against hers. They both drew in a deep breath that escaped in huffs of laughter when they realized what they had done. “Love you back,” he murmured, giving her a soft kiss. “Should we, uh, turn our video back on and finish the call?”

“If we have to.”

Lena was tapping her fingers impatiently; she stopped, looking embarrassed when the call resumed. “Did we come to a decision?”

Kristoff looked over at Anna; she nodded firmly. “Yes. We’re taking option two.”

“Are you sure? This is an opportunity to--”

“Get a new publicist? Interesting suggestion.”

Lena’s mouth snapped shut. Kristoff and Sam both shot her a surprised glance; she was never harsh like this. Well, she thought, times are changing in more ways than one.

“Alright, then,” Sam said at last. “Whatever you want, kiddo. Guess we’ll just...wait and see.”

[justinswifeyy94]

"We Are Just Your Fans Right?"

Y/N P.O.V.

It was Thursday night after we all finish our late nights at the library studying so we decided to do something fun.

“Oh I got it! Let's go to the hockey rink.” Zane suggested while everyone agreed excitedly.

We were all goofing off in the car as we drove to the Kings Valley Ice Rink. Justin's song Just Friends came on and Hailey and I started singing along. Zane and Jonas groan at us because they won't much fans of Justin's music.

Hailey and I were huge beliebers, we worked two jobs just to get money to buy tickets to go to his shows. It was floor tickets because we couldn't afford those but we didn't mind at least we got to see our idol. We have been supporting him since day one but we never had much luck getting him to notice us on any of his social media's.

We pulled up to the ice rink as we all hop out. Hailey and I both wore our Purpose Merch. Hoodies and sweats. We saw paparazzi outside as we entered but we didn't think much of it. Probably just the hockey players. Zane give me a piggy back ride inside. We all got our gear as we headed to the rink. I was talking to Zane and Jonas as I felt Hailey elbowed me in the ribs.

“Bitch!” I muttered in pain before she started to fangirl. “Y/N! Look it's Justin!” she whispered shouted pointing to the corner of the rink where I saw him and Selena. Justin on his knees on the bench leaning over the table and Selena on top of edge of the barrier reaching for Justin as their lips met each other. My blood started to boil so it wasn't my place cause I'm nothing more than a “stupid fan”.

“Let's go play!” I shouted pulling my helmet down as we took the ice. I kept my gaze on Justin as we played, his team against ours. Everytime he has the puck I kept running into him making him fall and score, I could tell he was getting annoyed but I didn't care. I heard him ask who is that but everyone wished I don't know. This time Hailey had the puck and Justin ran into her causing her to hit the ice hard. She groan in pain as we all rushed to her side.

I took my helmet off and I could tell Justin was shocked to see a girl playing hockey. “That's for hitting me to floor prick!” he spatted at Hailey and that's when I laughed. Zane and Jonas got her up to her feet removing her helmet also. “Nice way to talk to a lady. BTW she didn't hit you to the floor I did. It's not my fault you play like a girl.” everyone ohhh and laughed. I took my hockey stick causing him to trip again and the arena echoed in laughter.

As I was about to walk off he shouted a bit angry. “What's your problem?” I scoffed as Zane and Jonas telling me to let it go. “Shut the fuck up. Let her talk.” Justin said annoyed and that's when I lost it.

I walked up to his face and looked him in the eye. “You are my problem! I can't believe I ever supported you! All you ever did was hurt us. You never cared. We were the ones who were there for you was she left you.” I said pointing to Selena. “But why would that matter right? Cause we were only sending our love and support day and night over a computer where I'm pretty sure you never checked. We are only your fans right?” I asked and he said.

“Right. My fans who will love and support me no matter what.” I clench my fist. “Of cause I see. The ones who you just use to promote your music, buy your merch, cds, songs on iTunes, vote for you… the list could go on but when it comes to our feelings or opinions we are wrong, we are sending hate or what have you right?” he didn't say anything as Selena called out to him turning his attention of me to her. He was about to leave but I stopped him.

“We are all humans right? We make mistakes, you always want us to give you a break but you never gave us a break. She hurt you so much to a point there was no turning back, us beliebers went to bed crying at night that when we wake you might not be there. What was she doing when you were hurting? Besides partying, making fun of you, dating around like you never existed… because I could tell you was us beliebers were doing. A side of crying to sleep, we prayed that God will guide you and bring you back from that darkness, we prayed you would find your purpose again, rise up when everyone had lose hope.” I explained feeling my voice croak a bit. He looked down as he licked his lips.

“Of cause we don't know everything that happened with between you too but we saw enough to want to protect you so you don't get your heart broken again. We are just afraid if you get heartbroken this time there is no çoming back and we will lose you for good.” I felt a tear leaked down my cheek as Justin was about to touch me i stopped him and back away. “You go live your life… but always remember we are not just your fans… we were once your family.” I said before leaving and everyone cheered, clapping as we left the ice rink.

The next day I saw a video of me on ig telling Justin off and apparently it was a huge hit. I went on Twitter and I saw my followers and mention we increasing but one message stand out over all was. Justin Bieber Sent You A Message. I didn't know whether I should read it or not.

Thank you for making me realizing how important you guys are to me. You were right. Without you guys there will be no Justin Bieber and I'm sorry for taking you guys for granted. Thank you for always supporting me and showing love. I love you. - JB✌

[austinhuang0131]

The Destroyer

A story I wrote for a school assignment.

I was sitting on the bus on my way home. It got stuck on the highway, as usual. So I was chilling on my seat in the back, earplugs in, hoping the traffic ends, as usual – I always get a seat on any bus. Maybe it’s just good luck. BANG. About five vans, all in black, quickly surrounded the bus. Around twenty men, dressed in black, all masked, jumped out from the vans. Two men cracked the front door open with a hammer. Using their knives, they quickly controlled the driver and most passengers in the front. I kept telling myself, “Keep calm, man. You got this.” Slowly, they started looking at everyone’s face. I knew it. They’re coming for the person. The person who stood up and took a stand against them. The person who puts justice in front of them. It’s me.

I am a student. But don’t get fooled by my appearance: that’s not it. Before I came here, I had a pretty wealthy life there: My family earned a huge fortune from developing internet in the end of the last century. My father was a reputable person who owns the country’s first online forum, where people gathered and discussed everything. I never worried about my life: My education, my amusement, my everything. But times change. We got a new government there. Corrupt as hell. Savage. Evil. Greedy. Terrifying. All my friends started disappearing, one by one. But my parents never mentioned any of that. “Nothing to worry, kid,” my mother says, “things will get better, sooner or later.” Soon my father stopped working. He looked tired every day. I heard from my “surviving” friends that his website came down because the government didn’t like it. He lost his job. And one day, the officials from the tax office knocked on our house’s door. My parents knew: It’s a raid. My father took out everything that could stop them, but they just tore these things into pieces. “Listen. We don’t care about these pieces of trash of these people. We are doing as we’re ordered to. Now, give way, please.” My parents just kept standing in front of them, silent. These officials took out their pistols. My parents remained still. Tears running down from their cheeks. BANG! My father, the strongest man as far as I know, just lied down, formed a fresh wound on my childhood. My mother cried when she tried to save her husband. “Please! Don’t take our child!” “Shut up!” The officials came in and opened all our drawers. Bunches and bunches of our hard-earned cash carried out onto their trucks. As soon as they emptied all the drawers, they drove away as fast as possible, leaving my father bleeding. He died. My mother didn’t want me to live like that. We moved to hide from the officials. I quit school. But my mother still couldn’t believe I was safe. One by one, my remaining friends over there went disappearing. I began to be afraid. It was another day and my mother finally got a chance to send me abroad. “We’ll handle everything but one,” The man who sent me here, said. “You’ll have to crawl into the cargo storage of that plane. Once the plane leaves the ground, the crew will let you out.” I accepted. My mother spent her last savings putting me into safety. And this makes up my first time riding a plane. Before I left, my mother handed me a bag with some comic books. I like comic books. “Keep them safe,” my mother said, “so that when you miss me, or your father, you can read these comic books.” I landed here. Several hours of tumbling journey relieved from my shoulder. Border agents lead me to their office, where I was given a warm welcome. “We know how much it took to get you here. But anyways, you are here, and you are safe.” They gave me a large box of supplies. I just couldn’t stop showing my appreciation. My foster family lead me away. To their house. They looked after me. As I grew, I started to learn about all these shady stuff that the government did there. They took every rich families’ money. They spent it for their own pleasure. It was another day, one year later. I missed my family so much that I started reading my comic books over and over. My foster mother asked: “Oh, you’re still reading the oldest one in that series?” “There’re newer ones?” I was surprised. She brought me some. It’s the new ones. I opened them and noticed the thinner pages. “Wait, why are the pages so thin? Look at my book. It’s that thick!” By mistake, I tore a page from the book. Pages of paper hidden inside the pictures. I took one of them out. “Bank Statement,” it says. Belonged to a famous official there. 8 figures. Lots of transactions, showing where they got the shady money from, and where they spent it. Then I tore all the pages off. From other comic books, too. More of these pages revealed. “Woah. What the hell is that?” My foster mother was just plain surprised. From all these extra paper taken out from my comic books, I saw one page handwritten by my mom. “Release them to the public. Let their guilt to be known.” “Woah.” My foster father came too. “You really need to. Realize your mother’s dream. For real.” So they booked the community arena for me, while I notified all these TV stations in my city. I did the presentation. I showed all the evidence to the public. They gasped. Rounds of applause. Media probed. Headlines gathered.

“Hey, you. Wake up.” They finally found me. I know what’s going to happen next. “Looking sharp,” I said. I jumped out from my seat and kicked him right in his face, then I took his knife. “Just a bunch of part-time scumbags? Why don’t you guys bring an army here? Like an ARMY???” The other man took out his radio, probably called his colleagues, then took out his pistol. But it’s too late. I threw my knife at him, right in his chest. “Oops, didn’t mean to kill him. But anyways.” I emptied out his pockets and got that nice pistol and some bullets. As I ran out of the bus, the cops arrived. The men in the vans were just damn scared. They probably couldn’t believe this. I shot out all the tires of the vans first, as swiftly as I could, then I tried to shoot as many masked men as possible, at their shoulder. I didn’t really want to kill them, to be honest: Neutralizing them was enough. It was pretty difficult, but I did it. Relief. I walked to a police officer, who just stepped out of his car, and… BANG! BANG! BANG! Damn it! There’s like a…like a whole damn convoy of these vans, but with…like machine guns on their tops! SERIOUSLY? THAT’S LIKE SUPER INSANE TO KILL A TEEN WITH THAT, I thought. Anyways, luckily that officer was still standing outside, so I grabbed the car key from his pocket and got into the cop car. BANG! BANG! BANG! No more time to think. I stepped on the gas. Another lifetime experience began. BANG! BANG! BANG! I turned on the siren and drove on the road shoulder. These brats were also fast as hell, like, they must’ve had special mutated vans with like freaking machine guns from somewhere, like arms dealers, I guess? I drove as fast as I can. “Gas, Gas, Gas!” I started singing that meme song as I was getting closer to 200 km/h. BANG! BANG! BANG! It was getting quieter and quieter. Knew it. I mean, these are vans. They’re like pretty heavy already, thus they couldn’t be faster than a small car. Plus, that was a police car, which is like a special mutated car, so I thought I was fine. These brats finally got out of my sight. Relief again. I started thinking about telling people my extraordinary experience: Imagine if your first driving experience is to drive a cop car, and you tell that to girls? That’ll be like zero hassle of choosing a wife later on. Imagine if your first driving experience is to drive a cop car, and you say that on Twitter? That’ll be like thousands of retweets and followers… “WHAT ARE YOU DOING?” A voice in my head shouted. Sounds like my mother. “It is YOUR CHANCE to BRING THEM TO JUSTICE and LET THE WORLD KNOW HOW SAVAGE THEY ARE! Also, you can’t just get carried away when you’re driving that fast.” Damn. I realized that these brats are completely out of sight. “Shoot. My original plan was to bait them into a cop station…I guess I’ll just wait here.” I lowered my speed to let these brats catch up with me, which they did. “I guess what I need to do from this point is to keep the distance and bait them to that cop station.” Fortunately, I’m familiar with this highway, as I look out during my daily bus journeys. Lucky me. And then I drove into a police station. I drifted in front of the building. Perfect parking skills. “Woah, can’t believe I can do this!” But no more time for self-compliments. Let’s get right into the business. “Woah. Look at that. Who drives a cop car like this?” The reception guy in the front was just amazed. “Hello…it’s me…” I didn’t realize that I was so tired from high-speed driving that I couldn’t even speak fluently. “Wait, you…the government leak guy?” Ouch. “The government leak guy”? That’s a bit too much. “Yeah, I guess. Anyways, man. I just sped on the highway with that car, you know, and then there are these guys…” BANG! BANG! BANG! “…chasing me. So just ‘arrest’ me already. And them, too.” An officer led me to a cell and said, “Man, we got this. You’ll be safe here.” He locked the door. “We’ll get you out tomorrow. No record.” “No record,” I said. I heard the glass shattering. It was these brats. Too late.

There were tons of people greeting me outside the police station just now. Governmental officials, media, or just ordinary people, some of them carrying slogans. “KILL ALL FOREIGN SPIES”, one said. I smiled at it. “Okay…I got this, man.” A woman was helping me with the microphone. “Let me tell you something. You got treated unfairly in your life, and you felt like you lost? No! Fight it. These people never win. That’s it.” I quickly crawled through the crowd and got my bag that I left on the bus from an old couple. “Oh, and the bus driver, too. That was so unfortunate.” I left the scene swiftly to get to the cop car that was going to bring me home. “Oh yeah, by the way.” The driver said, “You have a really nice driving skill.” “Thanks. I mean I tried it on the spot. I can’t believe it worked.” “Here’s a letter from the security services. You’ll probably go to have to change some of your habits to protect your life.” I opened it. A bunch of appreciations, and warnings, and suggestions… “Wait, ‘Wear women’s clothes in public to avoid people recognizing you’? That’s a bit much.” “Wow. But I didn’t write that. It’s the bosses. They probably know what’s best for you.” “Ouch.” I gasped. A notification from my phone popped up. I glanced it over and read it out. “BREAKING: International community condemns the act of attempting to assassinate a 15-year-old teenager, who leaked governmental documents that reveal the severe corruption and terrible human rights condition in the country, on foreign soil.”

I am a student, who is also destroying a country, for my family.

[korean-pop-stuff]

Day6 Concert - EveryDay6 Concert July REVIEW

I had an opportunity to travel to Korea for the second time this past summer from June to August. While there, I had to snag the chance of attending a kpop concert in its motherland to see if it would be any different from a kpop concert in the US (and also because it is about two times cheaper in Korea)

One- or should I say, two- of the concerts I attended were both days Day6 had their July concert on July 29th and 30th of this year (2017) in Seoul, Korea.

Before I go any further, I think I will give a brief introduction of this band (yes, and actual korean pop BAND)

Members

(if you want to learn more about the members, I suggest that you check out their profile on kprofiles here)

Sungjin (93) - Leader, Main Vocalist, Guitarist

Jae (92) - Lead Vocalist, Rapper, Main Guitarist

Young K (93) - Lead Vocalist, Main Rapper, Bassist

Wonpil (94) - Lead Vocalist, Pianist (keyboard, synthesizer)

Dowoon (95) - Vocalist, Drummer

Day6 is a little different because they are a band, but just like other kpop idols, they are signed under an entertainment company. However, unlike other kpop idols, they do not do choreography.

For the year of 2017, Day6 decided to release 2 singles every month of this year and hold a concert once every month.

I had the honor to attend one of these concerts for the month of July, and for both days at that.

It was interesting compared to other kpop concerts I have experienced because kpop group concerts are more about watching people dance and perform which requires me to pay more attention the performers. And in kpop group concerts, there is just tracks playing in the background with the idols singing, and sometimes lip syncing because it is hard to sing and dance and dance at the same time. But a band setting is more relaxed and they play their own instruments and sing with their raw voices with no vocal backup.

I totally enjoyed the whole concert and every single song was amazing. The audio was great as well, which is hard to achieve at many concerts (at least in my experience)

On the first day, I was in the standing section with my friend and on the second day, I was on the second floor with my friend. Both were nice and there were pros and cons to both. The standing section is more fun to be up close with the members and jump and move around, but it was tiring after a while and it was hard to see the other side of the stage where the other half of the members were. The seated section has the best view and people were seated the whole time so it was more relaxing. I was able to see the performances much more clearly and all of the band members.

The band members were interactive with the crowd as well which made the experience just that much fun. For instance, they asked us if we’re having fun, they told us to drink water so we don’t get dehydrated, they got off the stage and walk into between the crowd, they made each section scream to see which section could scream the loudest, etc. And of course there are official fan chants all the fans have to do in certain parts of the song, just as a way to sing along and encourage the band performing (fan chants apply to all other bands/artists/groups in Korea)

We had to buy wrist bands that light up and use them as light sticks and they have light settings, so that was fun to play around with.  Even though I went to the concert as a fan, I still didn’t know every single song, but they became easy to sing along and the fanchants became self-explanatory after a while, so I did not feel left out at all.

Unfortunately, we weren’t allowed to film during the concert BUT I was able to sneak some footage the first day. The security was much more strict on the second day probably because of the amount of footage that was leaked online the previous day so I was not able to get anything on the second day.

If you want to see all the footage I filmed and posted, I have it in a thread on my twitter here.

This picture shown below is the set-list of the concert ↓

A lot of their songs are upbeat and uplifting so they just put you in either a really hype mood or a good, serene mood. ‘Colors’ is a slow jam so the concert started off on a mellow note. Then they came in with ‘I Wait’ and ‘How Can I Say’ which are some of their more popular songs and more upbeat, but not yet uplifting. Then after they talked for a bit, they got into some of their exciting songs. I noticed that they categorized the songs according to their mood and separated them by talking in between. Overall, the concert was a nice experience, there was a nice diversity of songs and styles they performed which prevented the concert from getting boring, and it was even more fun to have my friend there to experience all of this with me.

One moment that really stuck out to me in ‘I Smile’, Sungjin has a solo part in the middle of the song where all the music just cuts out and he’s just belting out his beautiful voice. It was amazing and the whole crowd was silent in awe as he sang. And right after that part, the music just comes in all at once which excites the crowd once more. The whole thing was an emotional roller coaster, but in a good way.

Another legendary moment was when Dowoon and Wonpil sang together and harmonized. It was one of the most beautiful things I have ever heard. Not just because of the harmonization, but also because Dowoon doesn’t sing that much since he is focused on playing the drums. But Wompil mentioned that Dowoon practiced so he can sing and play the drums at the same time just for that performance. I thought that was so amazing and I was surprised to hear how nice Dowoon’s voice was. He needs to sing more often!

The members also talked in between a few songs and made it a very casual environment as well.

It was cool to see how their sound would differ from their music videos/official audios to their real sound, and I would say they are pretty much identical so I thought that was amazing. Every single member could sing too, and a group of talented people who can sing and play an instrument is not an easy feat.

Day6 is amazing and I definitely encourage you to check them out. They are very well-recognized in the kpop community and even non-fans are familiar with the name. They started at the end of 2015, but they have already come a long way. 

If you want to check out their music, here are music videos of some of my absolute favorite  the songs that were performed during the concert:

‘I Wait’

‘How Can I Say’

‘Congratulations’

When I look back and think about how I spent $100 for each night I saw them perform, I have no regrets. I would totally go to another one of their concerts again in the future, hands down.

[melpomenecokr]

﹟ ♡  THIS MONTH IN MUSIC  :  MAY 2019.

                                  ♡♡♡

May was a month that happened and I guess we need to talk about it. 

As barren as the month seemed for impressive releases, there were a few diamonds in the rough, thank God, and as I’m sure you’ve figured out by now, it’s my job to bring them to light, and talk about why these hits stood out among the many (many) misses this month of May had to offer. All complaints aside, I present to you my top five musical recommendations for the month of May. 

Just as they always are, links for purchase and streaming services will be provided at the end of each segment for their respective release. Please remember to support these artists and their music so we can hear more from them in the future. 

#005. “DDU-DDU ddu-ddu (뚜두뚜두)” - SINGLE BY ETUDE♡ (습작) RELEASE DATE: 03 MAY 2019

You all often like to joke with me that I am, for the most part, boy group illiterate, so it may not come with much shock when I say I’ve only knowingly heard a few songs from this group in the past. I tend to listen to almost anything and everything that drifts into my recommended or that I stumble across while browsing MelOn and the like, and I believe that’s how I discovered ETUDE♡ existed in the first place. In the case of “DDU-DDU ddu-ddu” (like the professionals we are on this blog, we’re going to shorten that to just “DDU-DDU” from now on, thank you), however, I actually sought this release out after seeing the video teaser the day prior, because it seemed very intriguing -- and for once, I wasn’t deceived. 

(Just to preface, we’re only going to be talking about the title of this release since this is not an in-depth review, but I would definitely recommend listening to the other two songs, if you’ve got the time.)

“DDU-DDU” is a pop-rap song heavily influenced by trap and EDM with its heavy bass and almost peculiar-sounding beat. Right from when the song starts and the group screams their name into your ear on the first beat drop, you get the sense this is going to be a power anthem about how great and capable they are and how they’re better than everyone else; and as eye-roll worthy as that sounds, that’s actually what makes the title track of this single so great. It knows exactly what it is and it accomplishes its goal perfectly with gutsy raps and surprisingly solid vocals. 

The aforementioned raps are really where this song finds its footing because the chorus isn’t much, but that’s perfectly fine, because with a song like this, the chorus doesn’t have to be groundbreaking. The first rap is delivered by member Yejun, with a slow and suavé kind of flow to it; the kind of rap you would expect to play while the final boss of a video game or the big bad of an action movie makes their first appearance. The punchlines are a little weak, but I think the way this rap flows in itself makes up for that in earnest, it just sounds so good, you don’t really care much about what he’s actually saying. Then, the second rap, delivered by member Saint, follows the chorus and it’s the antithesis of what the preceding rap was; it’s fast-paced, hard-hitting, and really drives home the point of the whole song. I still don’t know that ‘that ddu-du ddu-du du’ is but I fully believe I was hit with it. 

Not to undermine the vocalists, though, because they really did an outstanding job, despite this type of beat and vibe being more fitting for rappers. The main vocalist, Seongwoo, stood out to me because of the way he sang his lines. It’s hard for a lot of k-pop vocalists to portray bravado and confidence with their voices because they are trained to sing in very distinct ways, but he captured that vibe perfectly while still managing to sound stable and light. “DDU-DDU” is the kind of song you play when you need a confidence boost, no doubt about it, and it’s definitely made its way onto my playlist. 

Listen to “ DDU-DDU ddu-ddu (뚜두뚜두)” here and stream the music video here.

#004. “BLAME IT ON YOUR LOVE” - SINGLE BY CHARLI XCX AND LIZZO RELEASE DATE: 15 MAY 2019

These two getting together was completely unexpected on my part, but it was the match made in Heaven that I never saw coming. A snippet of this song actually leaked sometime last year, which had many living in the XCX-verse on the edge of their seats waiting for the project to come back ‘round, and Charli and Lizzo made quite a wave on Twitter when they announced they were doing this piece together. Though I was definitely thrown, I was excited; both artists have a way of being so wonderfully simple and straightforward with their lyrics, but combine that with complex arrangements and composition and messages that it leaves you trapped between two different feelings, and it’s great when music can evoke that strong of a response. 

“Blame It On Your Love” is no exception to this formula these two ladies employ in completely different ways, and their radically different styles come together with a harmony that makes this such a good, and unique song. I wouldn’t be against them forming a duo or doing a collaboration album, to be honest.

Anyway, “Blame It On Your Love” is an eccentric pop song about nervous jitters and different wavelengths making a relationship difficult -- the feelings seem unrequited but it’s hard for Charli to tell because she can’t get close enough to the object of her affections without turning into a nervous wreck, and sabotaging herself when it comes to opening up. Charli’s vocals are broken and slow and create a sense of nervousness and tension that the listener can resonate with, while Lizzo is confident and straightforward (as always) while delivering her short verse near the end of the song. She seems to be giving a completely opposite message than Charli, but because her high-energy rhymes are so different from Charli’s cautious vocals, it works. It’s not detached, either -- it doesn’t seem like it comes out of nowhere, as the production sets the dong up perfectly to have Lizzo give Charli this reality check. Her banter-like ad-libs really make this song so fun and enjoyable, too; despite Lizzo’s contributions seeming relatively small on the surface, she really did her part to make this song the summer-night anthem that it is. 

Overall, I really enjoyed this release, as I knew it was going to be great the moment they announced via social media that they were working together, even if I didn’t immediately know what to expect. I hope these ladies collaborate again in the future; I think when wildly different artists come together and vibe the right way, it can make a memorable spectacle. We need more of that. Some artists are way too full of themselves these days. 

Listen to “Blame It On Your Love” here.

#003. “DEDICATED” - STUDIO ALBUM BY CARLY RAE JEPSEN RELEASE DATE: 17 MAY 2019

If I could only recommend you one underrated artist to stan this year, it would be Carly Rae Jepsen. This is the first time I’ve discussed her on my blog for a while because she sort of fell off the radar after “Call Me Maybe” had the whole world singing in 5-syllable sentences for the better portion of 2012, however she came back onto my life on a better note when “Cut To The Feeling” was pretty much the Pride Anthem of last year. I went back and listened to pretty much everything I had missed from her and when I tell you this girl is not only talented, but pretty much dedicates her career to true retro-esque pop music, I mean it, and I couldn’t mean it more. While I’m sure none of us were as excited to hear “Dedicated” as my best friend’s boyfriend, there was a lot of anticipation surrounding Jepsen’s fourth studio album via her cult following. Now that it’s here, I can verify it was not only worth the wait, but that it didn’t disappoint in the slightest. 

Carly (I’m going to call her by first name for the rest of this segment because I feel foolishly close to her) has the energy and ambition of a pop star with the innocence and modesty of the girl-next-door, and I absolutely love that about her. As much as I need to hear a good, old-fashioned pop song about having sex with a stranger in the back of a stolen SUV every now and then, there’s something so refreshing about Carly’s innate curiosity about love and how desperately she wants to experience it as a young (33 is young, shut up) woman with a big heart. I believe “Dedicated” is the clearest glimpse into her world she’s ever given, and with that, the songs I would like to highlight from this 13-track (not counting the bonus tracks) wonderland of an album are “Now That I Found You”, “Right Words Wrong Time”, and “Real Love.” 

If you haven’t heard “Now That I Found You” by now, I want you to know that I am deeply disappointed in you. This song is everything you’d expect from CRJ and more -- the retro vibes, the high-energy, the stellar vocals and the addictive lyrics blend together to make this not only the song of the summer, but the song of every summer. The delivery of the lovesick lyrics is so earnest and bright that it not only puts you in a great mood, but makes you want to go outside and dance in the rain, regardless of who’s watching, or your high chances of catching a cold. This is exactly the kind of pure, unadulterated pop that Carly delivers consistently without getting stale; it’s so easy to get lost in her world that you won’t even realize 3 minutes and 20 seconds has gone by and you’ll want to replay it 20 times on your drive to work or while sniffing melons at the supermarket. I know this sounds oddly specific, and that’s because it is. I listen to every piece I review 3 times over at least, and this was one of the easiest songs to follow that rule with to date. 

“Right Words Wrong Time” is the second-to-last song on this album, and I think that was done with a concerning degree of intention. It’s a slow, melancholic track about a relationship that just isn’t working because the two lovers are on two different wavelengths. It rings consistent with Carly’s desire for passionate and confident love, as she’s frustrated with her lover for not prioritizing her enough to know what she really seeks in their relationship until its too late. I was considerably surprised by this track, but I think it works so perfectly for this album’s overarching layout and themes because it teaches the listener that you should never settle in a relationship, and you should know when you’ve given enough chances. It’s not a song you could break out in a full-choreographed dance to at any given time, but it doesn’t need to be for the message it’s trying to convey. Carly’s soft vocals and the simple, tastefully-repetitive beat amplify what she’s saying in a way that really resonates with the listener, which is exactly what the lyrics of this song demand. It works perfectly. 

Remember that point about “Right Words Wrong Time” intentionally being toward the end for a reason? Well, “Real Love” ends this album and that same concept must have been employed here, too, because this song ties this album together so perfectly, it could honestly work as a formal outro. It sums up what Carly has always been about, wanting “real, real love” in a cold and unforgiving world when she doesn’t know who to trust or who is telling the truth. It’s such a wholesome desire that I think most people can relate to in one way or another, because at the end of the day, a lot of humans just want real, honest relationships that give them a reason to get out of bed on a particularly tough day, or to reassure them that they’re worth something when the world gets them down. This energetic pop song and earnest ballad hybrid showcases just how much CRJ makes music for normal, everyday people who aren’t glamourous rich pop stars constantly feeling like they’re the best. It’s so honest and I can feel how naked she must have felt writing and putting out a song like this, and it shouldn’t go without appreciation. 

Listen to “Dedicated” here and stream the music video for “Now That I Found You” here.

#002. “90s BXTCH” - SINGLE BY KKUMA (꿈아) RELEASE DATE: 26 MAY 2019

If I had been on top of my game this month, this song almost certainly would have missed the cutoff date to be included in this list -- so I guess my turmoil was a blessing in disguise (though it could have always been included in next month’s, I know, but I like to be optimistic sometimes). 

Kkuma is one of those artists that, even if by some tragedy you don’t like her, you have to respect her because of how iconic her style is, what she stands for, and the fact that she’s probably produced some of your favourite Korean artists’ biggest hits. She’s really been outdoing herself this year by releasing so much music after leaving her fans with very little the last year and a half, and nothing she’s put out has been bad. Period. 

(The reason I haven’t been reviewing them all individually is because I’m nearly certain that she’s gearing up to release an album this year, by the way. I’m not a fake stan, I promise). 

“90s BXTCH” stood out to me this month because of how utterly Kkuma it is -- she’s basically pioneered the 90′s aesthetic in the Korean music industry and she knows that with a song like this, from the descriptions of classic 90′s aesthetics and imagery to the way this song sounds like it could have been ahead of its time during its release in 1996. The chorus references “Sade,” though I’m not entirely sure if it’s referring to the solo artist or the band she was in that was named after her -- either way, Sade is a 90′s icon known for her soulful vocals and unique style, and Kkuma mirrors that in 2019 in a way that is indescribable. It’s a perfect allusion.  

As the single description states, the track is an ambitious mix of 90′s R&B and contemporary hip-hop, and it works so beautifully, showing that old trends really never die because they always come back in one way or another. Kkuma makes it clear through this song that while she’s a simple woman, she isn’t basic; she enjoys the finer things in life but they’re not all she cares about. The song has an underlying message about being true to yourself no matter what everyone else is doing, and also that it’s a beautiful life when you mind your own business and do things your own way. The seamless blend of vocals and rap is done so well that it’s nearly undetectable when she’s switching from one to another, and I love that this woman literally has no rules when she puts out a song -- that she can do whatever she wants and still make something incredible. 

The beat of the song is just as relaxed and confident as the lyrics, and given that Kkuma writes and produces her own music, I’m not surprised by this, though I am impressed by how in-tune she is with her own aesthetic and her own music. Kkuma prioritizes aesthetics a lot in both her visuals and sound, and “90s BXTCH” is like the final boss as all of that culminates and she shows you exactly who she is and what she’s about in just one song. It takes strength, confidence, and self-awareness for an artist to do that, and Kkuma’s got all of that and more. I really hope to see this included on a future album of the same caliber. 

Listen to “90s BXTCH” here and stream the music video here. 

#001. “DUSK V. DAWN (황혼 대 새벽)” - REISSUE ALBUM BY NINEBANG (나인뱅) RELEASE DATE: 03 MAY 2019

If you’ve spent more than five minutes on my blog at any given time after NINEBANG’s debut in May of last year, this probably is no surprise to you. Especially when his age bracket and status as a rookie is considered, NINEBANG is one of the best artists out there right now, and the best male vocalist in the industry, by far. I was elated to see that his second mini-album “Eclipse” was being repackaged into a full-length album, and boy am I satisfied with the new material sprinkled into an already-great work. 

Whenever K-pop artists do repackage albums, I get a bit nervous that they’re either going to add bland remixes or re-hash the same song structure they had in the initial release, or completely destroy the synergy of the original release, if it had any to begin with. As much as I admire NINEBANG, I couldn’t evade those worries with him, and I was pleasantly proven wrong as the new material fits like a glove among the original material in terms of themes and structure. Whoever arranged this tracklist deserves a gold medal, as I especially appreciated how the new songs weren’t just tacked onto the end like an afterthought. 

So, that considered I want to exclusively focus on the new material, as I reviewed “Eclipse” in the past. The songs I have selected to pitch to you are, of course “WANT”,  “Artistic Groove”, and “Nightdrive.” 

Starting with the title track, “WANT” is perhaps the best of this dark, sultry image NINEBANG is exploring with both this album and it’s initial release. It’s a contemporary R&B and Pop hybrid, drawing the listener into NINEBANG’s sultry charms and powerful yet versatile voice. The lyrics are actually pretty simple and somewhat repetitive, but the way they are delivered makes this song the great listen that it is. I actually recommend you watch live performances of this song, too, because they are really something. I’ve never been a good dancer but watching someone not only outsing the industry but move so fluidly while doing so is beyond my realm of understanding. Anyway, “WANT” does its job to make you horny but it also incites this sense of curiosity in the listener, too; like the feeling you get when you know you’re about to indulge in a sinful pleasure but you wonder what the consequences will actually be, and if they’ll even be worth worrying over in comparison to the pleasure itself. This song spells out temptation with bold letters between NINEBANG’s seductive vocals and the spell-like lyrics. It’s not a listen for the faint of heart, but it’s a great song by a great artist, and that’s always worth your time.

Next is “Artistic Groove,” and if you thought “WANT” was a little dirty, we’re just getting started. This song is packed with innuendos and suggestive tones, to the point where my eyebrows were almost flying off my face the entire time I was listening to it. It’s so good, though; the way he lays out his sexuality and sensuality for the listener to explore. It, in turn, can make the listener feel confident and sexy, on top of being the kind of song you just have to move to. It makes a fleeting attraction feel like something deep and profound, like the excuses you make in your head before a hookup, and while that can be a little dangerous for the weak-willed (like me), it’s the kind of unapologetic self-expression and view into the artist’s mind that I like to see in music. I like to know that I’m listening to a person sometimes, and not some untouchable god, as much life as that can give me, too. 

Finally, let’s end this segment right by talking about Nightdrive. I actually wasn’t sure how I felt about this song the first time I listened to it, but it grew on me by the second time, and by the third, I was belting out the chorus to my neighbours’ dismay. This track features another great vocalist, June of GEMINI, who you may remember from last months’ TMIM post. I can tell these two are friends because they work together really well; their singing styles are pretty different and wouldn’t work together in even a slightly different setting, but they made them work in this suave R&B track about a blossoming attraction in the confined space of a car. The way the verses and bridge build up to the loud and funky chorus via both the lyrical structure and the arrangement of the song itself is so smooth and easy on the ears, while it simultaneously builds anticipation in your chest, and I really enjoy getting invested in a song like that. Their chemistry is really what makes this listen so enjoyable, because I honestly feel as though if anyone else released this song, it wouldn’t have been that great. It just goes to show how specific music can be. 

Listen to “Dusk V. Dawn (황혼 대 새벽)” here and stream its music videos here and here. 

This concludes May’s installment of “This Month in Music”! I hope you found something new or learned to appreciate something you may not have before through these recommendations. Please remember to support the artists by visiting their respective links, and enjoy their music legally. Also, be sure to tell me about your own recommendations from this month in the comments, and feel free to respectfully discuss any of the points I’ve made here, whether you agreed or disagreed. 

Love always, see you next month!  ♡ 

[junker-town]

NFL Dad: 6 hours of RedZone with 2 kids under the age of 3

Football’s back! But the kids are still around. One dad’s diary of the enervating journey to heartbreak and bedtime.

Killing time until 1:00 p.m. Eastern during football season used to feel like an eternity. Wake up at 11, eat a breakfast sandwich, set fantasy lineups, and then ... wait. Maybe go to a bar? Yes, I would go to a bar and watch dozens of TVs at once and drink all the beer I wanted for three or 7 hours.

That was another lifetime. Today, I spend my morning at a 3-year-old’s birthday with my wife, daughter (almost 3), and son (16 months). The party, which is three miles from our home, requires us to pack enough provisions for an Arctic expedition, yet I eat no breakfast and pack no food for myself; I am too preoccupied with the high-wire act of keeping two toddlers happy and entertained without resorting to bribery.

Because the kids’ naps (and my job) start at 1:00, my wife and I vow to leave the party at EXACTLY noon. We leave at 12:15. My son falls asleep in the stroller, practically guaranteeing he won’t take his usual 2-hour nap. But that doesn’t mean we won’t TRY to get him to sleep. We arrive home at 1:00. I take off my son’s shoes and dunk him in his crib like Shawn Kemp cleaning up the glass.

I turn on the TV, and Scott Hanson’s handsome visage fills the screen. I instantly have the same feeling that people used to have for news anchors: here is a steady voice to guide me through the coming storm.

EARLY GAMES, FIRST HALF

— The Titans, hosting the Raiders, begin their season with an onside kick attempt; it fails, and Derek Carr will start at midfield. The Browns begin their season by getting a punt blocked, which the Steelers recover for a touchdown. Marshawn Lynch rumbles through traffic for a gain of 14 on his first carry as a Raider. Matt Stafford throws a pick-6. Amari Cooper catches a touchdown. The Jets intercept a Tyrod Taylor pass in the end zone, but fumble the ball back during the return? I can’t be sure about that last part, because I’m reading to my daughter before her nap. Mr. Plumbean has a big orange splot of paint on his roof, and the neighborhood association is PISSED.

On third-and-12, Carson Wentz evades most of the Washington defense and hucks it downfield to a wide-open Nelson Agholor, who races in for a 58-yard score. I have now seen multiple touchdowns scored on offense, plus defensive and special teams scores, AND I’ve read a children’s book. It has been 15 minutes since I turned the TV on.

— At 1:20, with both kids in bed and Marcus Mariota scoring on a zone-read keeper, my wife leaves to run some errands. “Is that my son making noise?” I think to myself as she closes the door. Surely not!

1:22 — He is definitely awake. I go to check his diaper; it’s dry. I sing him a song and put him back down.

1:26 — I leave my son’s room to the sound of my daughter calling me. She needs a diaper change. I sing her a song and put her back down.

1:31 — I leave my daughter’s room to the sound of my son crying. The Ravens intercept Andy Dalton as I pour a bottle of milk. SLEEP, YOU ADORABLE VAMPIRES.

— In Nashville, the Raiders go for it on fourth-and-1 inside the Titans’ 5. Marshawn Lynch sidesteps an unblocked defender in the backfield, then fights two more defenders to move the chains. Now facing first-and-goal from the 2, the Raiders proceed to:

throw incomplete to Amari Cooper on first down,

throw incomplete to Amari Cooper on second down, and

throw incomplete to Amari Cooper on third down.

Goddammit, Raiders! You indefensible slugwits. Did Super Bowl XLIX teach you nothing? THE SEAHAWKS DIED SO THAT YOU MAY LIVE.

And well well well, looky here. It’s Derek Carr taking shots at the Seahawks’ play calling back in June.

"There's no we'll be on the 1 yard line and I won't give it to Marshawn, I'll throw it." http://pic.twitter.com/0yhqrWEFWT

— NBCS Raiders News (@NBCSRaiders) June 23, 2017

ENJOY REGRESSING TO THE MEAN, FRESNO BOY.

— My son is making noise in his crib, but he isn’t crying. He’s probably having fun by himself in the dark room, right? I leave him be. As Andy Dalton throws another interception, I text my wife and beg her to come help. She’s nearby! Parenting: successfully dodged.

— Jordan Howard scores for the Bears to tie Atlanta 10-10 just before halftime. There’s a ton of Twitter chatter about Tarik Cohen, a player I have definitely heard about before today, because I am a fantasy football savant and professional NFL commentator. Like, who doesn’t know that Cohen, uh ... (*opens new tab*)

I only went to this page to add information to it!

... is an American football running back? And that he played the same position for North Caroline A&T? Common knowledge for even the most common fan, says this dedicated NFL expert.

— Chris Thompson scores an incredible touchdown for Washington:

6? 7? 8? More? Let’s count how many defenders Chris Thompson made miss on this CRAZY @redskins TD. #HTTR http://pic.twitter.com/iHnmjE4nnG

— NFL (@NFL) September 10, 2017

Yes, it was pitiful tackling from the Eagles, but credit Thompson for staying on his feet through the contact. Kind of unfair that Kirk Cousins gets credit for throwing that touchdown.

— In Houston, where J.J. Watt received a hero’s welcome when he stepped on the field, the Texans are getting worked by the Jaguars. Tom Savage fumbles, resulting in a scoop-and-score for the Jags, but it’s overturned on review — his arm was moving forward before he lost the ball. The telecast barely has time to show that Calais Campbell has 3.5 sacks in the first half when Savage is sacked and fumbles AGAIN, resulting in another defensive score. For a moment, I thought I was watching a replay of the previous fumble return touchdown, but no: this is a different play, and this time it counts. The Jags go into halftime up 19-0; Tom Savage has been sacked six times while leading Houston to 52 yards of offense.

— Through 100 minutes of RedZone, I have seen one offensive play from the Jets: a 1-yard pass. Granted, I missed some time while parenting, but RedZone knows what the people want: not the Jets, dear God, anything but the Jets.

EARLY GAMES, SECOND HALF

— DeShaun Watson makes his Texans debut; Bill O’Brien has benched Tom Savage. And say what you will about O’Brien’s complete inability to evaluate quarterback talent, at least he’s quick to pull the hook when he chooses the wrong guy, which is usually. Watson completes his first three passes in what is already the Texans’ longest drive of the day — not that the bar was high.

The drive ends in a touchdown pass to DeAndre Hopkins, and I cannot understate the glaring and obvious difference between Savage and Watson. Savage’s movement in the first half resembled the first time in Ratatouille that Remy remote-controlled his blindfolded human friend by yanking his hair. Watson, conversely, looks like a natural biped. I am convinced Bill O’Brien has brain parasites.

— Hey, a Jets touchdown! I saw precisely zero of the plays that led to it. The ensuing 2-point conversion is intercepted, and I believe all the way down to my marrow that every Jets TD this season should come with a pick on a 2-point attempt. I want to look at the final score every week and have reason to doubt that they scored a touchdown.

— T.J. Watt earns a personal foul penalty, and then immediately intercepts DeShone Kizer. He’s got two sacks and a pick in his debut for a storied NFL franchise. I’m going to enjoy this moment right now: it’s the last one before I am shown T.J. Watt’s face repeatedly every week. But at this second? I couldn’t pick T.J. Watt out of a crowd of large, muscular people. It’s nice.

— Matt Ryan finds Austin Hooper wide open for an 88-yard touchdown. “Wait,” you’re saying, “how does a tight end run the length of the field without getting caught?”

Well, my friends, he does it buy putting Quintin Demps into the ground.

RIP, Quintin Demps, conveniently already buried in the grass of Solider Field.

— Quick story from the kids’ birthday party. One of the dads there had a thick orange cast on his hand. He was a bookish guy: slim, glasses, graying hair and gray beard neatly trimmed — a Brooklyn Dad like many other Brooklyn Dads. One of the other dads signaled to his cast and said, “What happened?”

He sighed. “I smashed it pretty bad at Burning Man.” A long pause, and none of us interrupted it. He added: “... as one does.”

— Tony Romo breaks down Seth Roberts’ touchdown, pointing out the Air Raid staple Four Verts. It’s maybe 10 seconds of analysis, but it’s like breathing pure oxygen after YEARS of Phil Simms leaking carbon monoxide into my home. It’s also only one game, and we haven’t had time to get tired of his vocal tics, but Tony Romo is already legitimately great in the booth.

Thank you for retiring, Tony. This is so much better than you making the Broncos good.

— HOLY ADOREE’ JACKSON:

He jumped at the 26-yard line and landed at the 33: approximately 21 feet in the air, in football gear, as three different players tried to stop his forward movement. It’s no surprise he almost went to the Olympics in the long jump.

— Tarik Cohen scores a touchdown on what looked like a wheel route (my attention is not always fully invested in Mike Glennon’s work), and the Bears are giving the Falcons all they can handle. Remember that name: Tarik Cohen. I certainly will and always have, dating back to his youth in Bunn, North Carolina.

— On third-and-6 in the red zone with his team trailing, Kirk Cousins makes a terrible throw that gets intercepted at the goal line. The next time RedZone clicks over to the Washington-Eagles game, Brandon Graham is pulverizing Cousins just as he’s about to throw, leading to a fumble that Fletcher Cox takes into the end zone to ice the game. The replay looks like it could be ruled an incomplete pass, but the refs are like, “Nah, let’s go home,” and I respect that.

— With the Bears trailing by 6, Mike Glennon leads a hopeful but doomed last-gasp drive into the red zone. He gets sacked on fourth-and-10 to end the game, and the Bears all lift him onto their shoulders to celebrate covering the 7-point spread. They’re gonna be the best damn 5-win team you’ve ever seen.

— The Jaguars are up 29-7 with two minutes remaining, and they now have nine sacks. But hey, at least the Texans found their quarterback! He was hidden in the first round of the draft! Who would think to look there?

— The Lions and Cardinals are taking their sweet damn time finishing up their game. Kenny Golladay scores on a deep bomb, his second touchdown of the day, and I rue each of my three fantasy drafts in which I gave him serious consideration but ultimately passed. With the Lions up 28-17, Carson Palmer throws a pick-6. Ballgame.

LATE GAMES, FIRST HALF

— Ugh, Colts-Rams on RedZone. I’d rather watch truck commercials. I grab the remote, because I’m choosing Seahawks-Packers and commercials over the barren puntscape of the RedZone channel during the late games. I try to click over, and nothing happens. Am I in hell? No: I removed the batteries when I gave the remote to my son. Kid loves anything with buttons. Give him a room filled with fans, clocks, and buttons to push, and the only thing I’d ever have to do is change diapers and toss food in a couple times a day.

But before I can change the channel, Scott Tolzien throws a touchdown, but to the defense. The Rams are up 10-0 barely three minutes into the game.

And hey, Colts? Y’all know Colin Kaepernick is free to sign, right? You don’t have to ship your former first-round draft pick to the NFL’s reigning dynasty for their third-string quarterback.

— You and I, we’re friends, right? We’ve gotten this far in this football LiveJournal together, and so it’s time you knew the truth: I am a Seahawks fan, and for the next 3 hours the TV will be on this game. If you are a Panthers fan who wants to read about the 49ers game, you should leave this page now before you get even more disappointed.

— The first quarter is bad, both from my perspective as a Seahawks fan, and for anyone who enjoys fun things. Seahawks defensive tackle Nazair Jones, who has one of the most uplifting stories in this year’s rookie class, intercepts Aaron Rodgers point-blank and rumbles the length of the field for an incredibly rare and joyous Fat Guy Pick-6.

The Seahawks, though, pick up two flags on the play: Cliff Avril had a glancing swipe of Rodgers’ shoulder pads that was ruled a block in the back, and cornerback Jeremy Lane — who was dragged to the ground by Davante Adams grabbing his facemask — was ejected for a retaliatory forearm shiver. The touchdown is wiped off the board.

In #SEAvsGB they missed the initial foul on Adams. And that was a block in the back on Rodgers? I don't think the play was well-officiated.

— Mike Pereira (@MikePereira) September 10, 2017

I do not yell. I do not swear. The person that my children see in this moment is, essentially, the same gentle father who guides them through every morning and every night. Perhaps I say, “Gosh darn it,” which my daughter parrots, which makes me smile even though my blood is BOILING. I calmly pour myself a glass of gin in a mug. The game, somehow, stays scoreless through the quarter.

— My daughter has a habit of repeating the same question over and over; it’s how she sponges up language, hearing the same words repeated until she gets everything in full context. But ohhhhh, sweetie, my daughter, light of my life: If you ask me “What is the yellow man doing?” again, I will lock you out in the hallway. His name is Aaron Rodgers, and he’s screwing us, mmkay?

— Five minutes into the second quarter, the Seahawks get their first first down. BUST OUT THE CONFETTI. But on 3rd-and-7, Russell Wilson — under pressure from Mike Daniels — overthrows an open Tyler Lockett downfield on what would have been a touchdown.

— How have the Packers not scored yet? Aaron Rodgers seems to have two or three miracle 3rd-down conversions every drive before the Seahawks defense can force a punt. The only reason Green Bay hasn’t kicked a field goal yet is Jon Ryan, the finest ginger Canadian punter in the NFL, who pins the Pack deep repeatedly.

— I’m still mad about Naz Jones’ touchdown being called back, and I’m still mad about Jeremy Lane’s ejection. But time and gin are helping.

— My daughter asks if I took any photos of her at the birthday party today. Are you kidding? All I do is photograph my kids. So she crawls up onto the couch and I swipe through pictures of her blowing bubbles and pushing a giant beach ball as the Seahawks only rush 3 on 3rd-and-16 and OF COURSE Rodgers converts! UGH. NEVER RUSH THREE. YOU IDIOT COWARDS.

I don’t say any of that, of course. I am sharing a moment with my firstborn, trying to focus on the sheer joy that she got from blowing some bubbles on a sunny day in the park. That’s the life, man. Just blowing bubbles. Sports are for dopes.

— With a minute left in the half, the Seahawks get the ball on their own 11. With three straight running plays, it’s clear Pete Carroll wants to kill the clock and head into the halftime with the score knotted at zero. But the Packers — anticipating a chance for one last drive — call their final two timeouts before the Seahawks, seemingly by accident, pick up a first down. NOW they call a timeout and try to score.

The next two plays are a 34-yard pass to Doug Baldwin and a Russell Wilson scramble to the Packers 15-yard line. It is incomprehensible to watch after almost a full half of three-and-out drudgery.

So, with two timeouts and the ball on the 15, the Seahawks are forced to kick a field goal on third down, lest the clock expire without getting any points — all because they wasted half their time trying to burn clock at the other end of the field. This team is bad and winning and I hate them.

LATE GAMES, SECOND HALF

— Let’s check in on the action in Los Angeles and Santa Clara.

Tickets for Colts vs. Rams were $6 and still nobody showed up. http://pic.twitter.com/RND1DmDOof

— Jordan Heck (@JordanHeckFF) September 10, 2017

Second half kickoff http://pic.twitter.com/sEQgbtfJIq

— Ann Killion (@annkillion) September 10, 2017

See? I’m not ignoring the 49ers and Rams games! I’m merely giving them the same enthusiasm they got from local fans.

— With the Seahawks facing third down deep in their own territory, I think, “Oh God, Russell’s going to throw an interception here, isn’t he?” But no, I’m wrong. He fumbles instead. Packers get the ball on the 5.

Watching the replay, Troy Aikman blames Wilson for not protecting the ball better. And yes, that is technically factual, but it also ignores the reality of Packers linemen streaming through Seahawks-colored turnstiles on every play.

Just how Tom Cable drew it up. http://pic.twitter.com/RKNMH276QD

— Keith Myers (@MyersNFL) September 10, 2017

Hey, Dr. Aikman, maybe we can talk about the sickness instead of blaming the symptoms? (LIFEHACK: Never go to a doctor named “Troy.”)

Ty Montgomery punches it into the end zone. Packers up 7-3. Crap.

— Jimmy Graham gets mugged in the end zone, and the refs don’t call pass interference. The announcers find it questionable. Mike Pereira says it’s a bad call. I yell, “P. I.!” My daughter yells, “P. I.! P. I.!” because she knows more about football than these refs. Seahawks Twitter ... well, I will spare you the things that Seahawks Twitter said, but this unrelated image sums it up:

MARSHAWN LYNCH http://pic.twitter.com/q5eG5nlvVN

— SB Nation GIF (@SBNationGIF) September 10, 2017

Deep breath. Here is my rational take: it’s the kind of call you don’t get when you’re the away team and it’s not your day, and this is most definitely not the Seahawks’ day.

I close my laptop. I pause the game. When I come back to watch it, after my kids are in bed, I will watch most of the 4th quarter on fast-forward. The frames that click by will look like repeats of each other: Rodgers knocked to the ground, but a Packer with the ball crossing the yellow line anyway. The final 6 minutes-plus of game time will pass that way, the ending so unremarkable I zip past the final: Packers 17, Seahawks 9.

But for now, with sports frozen in time, I read books to my kids. I sing them lullabies. I hug them and kiss them, and their hair is fine and soft like fresh corn silk as I put them to bed.

It is immeasurable how much better this is than football. Even when my team wins.

[dagripster]

Rose Colored Sunglasses: The Art of Distraction in 2017 Media

A Political Deconstruction behind Katy Perry’s “Chained to the Rhythm”

“So comfortable we’re living in a bubble-bubble so comfortable we cannot see the trouble-trouble, so put your rose colored glasses on…and party on.”

Imagine this: You’re at a house party and you don’t quite know everyone there. You make awkward eye contact with someone you might be attracted to, then pretend you were looking at something else and then check your phone. It’s the art of distraction. So when things get uncomfortable just put on your rose colored glasses.

Katy Perry has been shocking audiences with her Wow! factor whether you’re a fan or not. Admit it: You’re like me. When she pops up on my TV or shows up in my timeline I roll my eyes and scroll past it. When she shows up on my timeline being, well, Katy, I half-smile, nod my head and again—scroll past it. If she’s not singing about kissing other girls or dancing with sharks in a cupcake bra she is distracting us.

Take off your rose colored sunglasses and pay attention to this.

Besides Katy Perry, what else is showing up on your timeline? For me I’m constantly seeing oppression, tragedy and political mayhem apart from whatever 90s sitcom is reuniting for a 2010s remake on Netflix. I’m constantly reading about Russia’s involvement with the 2016 presidential election and Trump’s attempt at running our great country (again, attempt.) He’s provoking foreign world leaders and hurting people who rely on him for answers. Members of the LGBT Community are falling back to the wayside and racism is becoming the social norm again after years of regulation. So you nod when it appears on your timeline like me, and then scroll past it. Maybe you’ll even post a half-assed status update about said topic and carry on with your Spotify Playlist. That’s when you’re putting your rose colored glasses on and enter Katy Perry’s ever ongoing house party located within a white picket fence while the world outside implodes because, let’s face it—this drink is on Katy Parry and we’re all slaves to the rhythm.

She’s trying to tell you something.

If you’re not going to listen to her cry for help, then she’ll gladly continue to distract us by playing your favorite song and putting it on repeat. That’s when the cupcake bra comes out from the closet and forced into your personal space. Remember, the drinks are on her!

Now, I’m no conspiracy theorist but I’ve heard my share of claims and ideas. I’m also not a political writer so please forgive any political sways or mistakes, but there is something here.

“Are we tone deaf? Keep sweeping it under the mat, thought we can do better than that…I hope we can…”

I’m imagining members of the Trump administration running around the Whitehouse trying to cover up any nook and cranny that might expose any leak or flaw regarding Trump’s presidential win. And that includes Russia’s involvement. We know it’s there and we know there was some involvement but we just keep missing our grasp because we keep-putting-on-our-rose-colored-glasses. Throw them out!

We think we’re free, drink! This one’s on me! We’re all chained to the rhythm.

I have a few 21 year old little cousins who all live in New York City. I was born there and moved out to Los Angeles when I was 26 to launch my career. They’re all still in NYC and I’m reminded that they’re 21 whenever I open a platform of social media, whether it’s a video filled with screaming girls doing a shot off another girl or the stereotypical hot guy bartender, or on Twitter where I read a drunk rant about one of their ex-boyfriends. Back in the 70s (now, I’m a product of the late 80s) from what I understand and learned about in history class is that this was the age range that was protesting against Vietnam and the draft. They took a stand and stood up for their country and ultimately helped shape the future of our country by showing Americans that we all do have a voice and if we use it wisely and collectively we can accomplish something! Something is wrong with America again, and we need those same voices. But where or where has everyone gone? When I look around, why do I see everyone look the same? I just can’t put my finger on it? Oh, right. They’re all wearing the rose colored glasses on and partying on. We think we’re free, were in trouble, but thank you Katy Perry! This drink is on you! Sure! I’ll be right over!

When I first heard Chained to the Rhythm on my local radio station in my Uber to work I—say it with me—rolled my eyes. “Another pop comeback,” I thought to myself. Lady Gaga returned in 2016 from her 2013 piece in which the self-proclaimed Queen of the LGBT community was now singing about being the rich bitch, the upper class in a song titled “Donatella.” When news broke of Lady Gaga’s 2013 effort that was called ARTPOP a commercial failure, geez? I wonder why? Because as a gay man myself, I was very excited to hear new poetic justice and raise my arms in a Hallelujahfashion, but instead she sang to us about her new social standing and class. In short, she is better than us. Side-eye emoji. Like Lady Gaga, Britney Spears and everyone else in pop culture, Katy Perry was also staging a comeback. I was never a KP fan…until I heard Chained to the Rhythm. I closed my eyes in the backseat of this random Prius I was riding in and listened to the song my driver was blasting. For some reason rather than glazing over the song, my brain chose to listen to each word as if it were a key or amulet in a Super Mario video game we might need to unlock another level.

I imagined a little boy not unlike the one we saw in the news from Aleppo. He was crying, covered in ashes and alone in this dark gloomy desert that very well could have been America. In this ghost town was Perry’s white picket fenced house. It was burned down of course but Perry emerges from the ashes and cradles the little boy and gives him his own pair of rose colored glasses, where he experiences a world of euphoria with life and vibrant colors. He was alright because he could distract himself from what the real world’s issues were. He’ll be fine as long as he chooses not to remember what happened to his parents by removing his glasses because if he does, mother Perry will be there to remind you to put them back on unless you choose to help. There, there.

…Up in your high place liars! Time is ticking for the empire, the truth they feed is feeble as so many times before, they greed over the people, they stumbling and crumbling and we about to riot they woke up-they woke up the lions!

Perry brings along a friend in this statement piece by the means of Skip Marley, the grandson of Bob Marley where he helps deliver her message. He’s a little more aggressive than Perry is and a lot less subtle. He immediately calls the administration liars in their high places in response to these money laundering thieves that run the Whitehouse. He notes how the time is ticking for this empire (can we call it that?) If this administration isn’t more careful or caught, they’re about to wake up the lions, and these lions are angry…and hungry! But how can we if we’re too distracted by these glasses that, let’s face it-are very pretty and with the right filter can airbrush us on the spot! It could be argued that is what Perry alludes to when she says “Are we crazy living our life through a lens?” in the beginning of the track. We have Bob Marley’s grandson is warning us! This has to mean something.

Are you lonely up there in Utopia where nothing will ever be enough?

Let’s face it—we live in America where the ideology of the American Dream is manifested throughout the world. We were taught even as children that getting a good education after High School can promise us a successful lineage into our adulthood. As millennials can see it is just not that easy anymore, or simple. Unless there is some form of wealth that can afford a Master’s Degree or PhD, I think we’re stuck in this in-between place that is America circa 2017. That is why we created the caricature of a lady called Kim Kardashian. She’s fun, right?! She’s pretty, young, her sisters are silly and we giggle a little when we watch a 6 second clip on one of the many social media platforms created for us. But at night, when the world sleeps and the sunglasses are put away, up there in a Kim Kardashian utopia, it must get lonely and nothing is indeed ever enough.  We struggle to pay off a costly student loan that might not have gotten us where we wanted to be while in moments, a sister is driving a car worth the same amount. And she didn’t have to lift a finger! What fun, right? Let’s sweep this under the mat too because we can do better than that…I hope.

It goes on and on and on… ‘cause we’re all chained to the rhythm.

Perry wraps up her statement piece by singing about the endless loop we got ourselves into. If we keep this up we might not be able to get out. Why? Because we’re all chained to the rhythm.

Next time you log into a social media account or talk to Sarah, the co-worker who likes to talk pop culture over by the water cooler at work, think about the lost little Aleppo boy in that imaginary post-apocalyptic America looking for his parents. We need to take a minute to take off those very pretty rose colored glasses because there is still time to set things right. While we should thank those innovators for creating Snapchat, Facebook, Linkedin, Twitter and even whatever outlet it is you’re reading this from, they just helped give us the voice which we are choosing to ignore and distract ourselves. We need to stand up like the way those “millennials” (for lack of better comparison) in the 70s did and stand up to make our voice heard because at this rate, we’re going to sit back in Katy Perry’s very comfortable recliner in her white picket fence house where she is hosting this nirvana of a party and not move a muscle until these glasses are taken away. Then what do we do? We can’t decide to revolt by then. It might be too late. Many of us might even be gone at that point. Otherwise, Katy Perry will continue to distract us with her cupcake bras and Lady Gaga and Britney Spears will shimmy themselves to death and we will continue to hand a Kim Kardashian-type free cash. Like Katy Perry claims in this 3 minute and 58 second song, she will continue to entertain us if we so choose to distract ourselves otherwise we need to listen to the underlying message in what is in fact entertaining us and do something about it.

Take the rose colored glasses off and save us.

Katy Perry is a product of Capitol Records. “Chained to the Rhythm” written by Katy Perry, Max Martin, and Sia. Produced by Max Martin. Released on February 10, 2017. Available on Apple Music and Spotify

[lesbianathene]

Saltlock: The List

i’ve spent the last 3 days compiling all the plotholes i could fine in series 4. tell me if i missed any.

There are times where a camera is in shot, not for any reason, there’s just a camera there.

Theres also a painting that has a ever-changing backlight for no specific reason which did not happen or appear over the course of the previous 3 series’.

If you pause at specific moments within the last episode you can see the green screens and the stunt mats.

John’s blog is now a photo?

John blames Sherlock for Mary’s death for no reason other than “You made a vow”. Mary was an ex-assassin and it was the plot point of the whole episode that someone wanted her dead. She dies and suddenly it’s Sherlock’s fault that she did?

There’s a random clown in episode 3?!

Episode 3 also known as Saw: The Sherlock Special with the random murder island controlled by Sherlock’s psychopathic sister who apparently exists even though Sherlock had written her out of his memories completely - was she just never spoken of again? How the fuck did Sherlock not know she existed.

Apparently Sherlock can’t understand that glass reflects.

Mycroft (head of secret service government things and done some pretty nasty shit) can solve cases quicker than Sherlock is apparently squeamish?

Its an umbrella that is also a sword AND a gun!

Mary sending DVDs of herself after her death at ‘convenient’ points with no explanation as to why she did it??

Someone mailing them for her??

Moriarty making clips of himself saying random shit that would all fit into this Saw Island plan that Sherlock’s sister has that wouldn’t take place for years?

Sherlock rewrote his memories of his childhood best friend as a dog for no reason… also this child had a dog bowl with his name on

No one could figure out that ‘Drowned Redbeard’ died in the well? Did no one check the well?? WHERE WERE HIS PARENTS???

‘Who you are doesn’t matter’

Multiple gay rape jokes

Moriarty playing the song ‘I want to break free’ a song about coming out coupled with the gay rape joke

The humiliation of Molly Hooper, just because she loves Sherlock

A bomb goes off in 221B which erupts in a (shitty) fireball and yet all the decor and the furniture are fine

Bombs apparently don’t go through floors either

The singing drone that appears from nowhere

John and Sherlock can jump out of a two storey window onto pavement and be fine

How did they get from Baker Street to a boat in the middle of the ocean?

How did they get from the murder island to the ancestral Holmes home?

John does nothing when Sherlock points a gun at himself

John mercilessly beating up Sherlock when it’s been pointed out that his organs are failing

The Six Thatchers story appears twice

Scenes get repeated with word and voice changes with no explanation

Mary can jump in front of Sherlock faster than a bullet from a gun

She gets shot in the heart and apparently can still talk for 15 minutes

John just forgetting about the fact that he has a 6 month old child

GIVE YOUR 6 MONTH OLD CHILD A CALL TO SAY GOODBYE I’M SURE SHE’LL PICK UP

Sherlocks sister having 3 different disguises and breaking out of prison for????

John is chained by his feet to the bottom of a well but apparently can get out once a rope has been dropped down

“Sherlock you were always the grown-up” SINCE WHEN EVERY SINGLE EPISODE HAS CALLED HIM A CHILD WHAT????

Freeze-frame ending

26 pages of dialogue that don’t exist

The last episode being leaked 3 times before it aired with no attempt to cover it up

Mary the assassin who is ‘evil’ according to the writers and the actress is now a lovely housewife who is just happy to be out of the way?

Sherlocks sister who just murdered innocent people for fun, nearly made you shoot you brother or your best friend, drowned your childhood best friend in a well, wants you dead, and spent the entire episode putting you through psychological torture can be forgiven with a hug in the end because that’s all the emotionless bitch wanted

There’s a memory drug that short-circuits your brain that is mentioned over and over again for no reason?

Why did Sherlock have trauma flashbacks associated with deep water when they never figured out that Victor was drowned in a well?

“What’s the worst thing you can do, to your very best friends? Tell them your darkest secret. Because if you tell them and they decide they’d rather not know, you can’t take it back, you can’t unsay it. Once you open your heart, you can’t close it again” - WHY WOULD YOU INCLUDE THIS LINE WITHOUT SHOWING SOMETHING TO DO WITH IT?

What was on the note that John gave Sherlock after he told him to leave and don’t come back?

What is Sherlock’s reoccurring dream that they kept mentioning?

The entire “romantic love would complete you” scene between John and Sherlock

Sherlock’s secret sister apparently can take over an entire psychiatric prison through talking?

“Culverton gave me Faith’s original note. A mutual friend put us in touch.” - WHO?! And WHY?!

Where tf did Mycroft go after they were all tranqed?

Who got the power and wifi running in the burned out ruins of the Holmes House?

John still apparently loves his dead wife so much even though he cheated on her every single time she left the room

“It’s not like the movies, there isn’t a big squirt of blood and you go flying backwards” - Molly on getting shot S03E03, then when Mary dies in S04E01 she dies in exactly that way

Mycroft’s in hospital, but then he’s not, but then he is, but then he’s not, but then he is.

Why did Sherlock go to the therapist?

Little girl starts fire in her bedroom, burns down house, but escapes with no physical burns or scars?

Does Lestrade work for every police force in Britain?

What was the point of the busts specifically being of Thatcher? There's nothing of importance regarding it other than she's a prominent British figure

Sherlock ignoring 'Vatican Cameos' (the codeword for danger)

"Play you" and he then goes on to play Irene's composition?

Molly talking to her lock screen

Everyone's “asleep” on this plane apart from this one little girl? Including the pilots?? And somehow the plane isn't crashing???

The 'doctoring' footage talk right at the beginning

Every choice you’ve ever made, every path you’ve ever taken, the man you are today, is your memory of your abuser

The appointment in Samarra bullshit

What’s with all the ‘hacking’ effects over BBC’s channel and twitter?

How did John get from being tranqed to Sherlock to then Mycroft’s house?

Who called the police at the end?

Eurus left murder island and then chose to go back?

Sherlock wasn’t wearing his coat when he’s tranqed, yet is suddenly wearing his coat when he awakes

How did Molly not hear Eurus when she was on the phone to Sherlock?

Lady Smallwood’s name changing every five minutes

John didn’t recognise a damn grenade

Why did everyone think that John’s blog was written by Sherlock?