#and I’m so happy for her that she managed to choose herself and realize that it wasn’t ever going to sway back

[pixiesfz]

so long london v.m x r

plot: the lead up to vivs departure

warning: mostly fluff and some angst

You were mad.

Furious.

You knew another contract wasn’t going to be made for Viv when she came home and told you that he never played her at Everton.

She had scored the most goals whilst being managed under his name, she was amazing at the game. She was a defender's worst nightmare.

You would know you used to be one.

It was when you played for City. No matter how hard you tried, every single game she scored past you. It made you angry whenever her name was on their starting sheet but of course, she would have been on the starting sheet.

She was the best number 11 the WSL had ever had.

Your hate grew into an admiration for the Dutch whenever she shook your hand with a smile “Good match” she would always say “Good goal” you said back, and she shrugged “You made it very hard for me”.

You both would laugh before returning to your teams.

You never realized that your cheeks blushed whenever she shook your hand a bit too long or smiled whenever the ball turned around and she had to turn into a defensive player.

She always used her hands to hold your hips after you got rid of the ball, stopping herself from bodying you over.

You were both relatively shy off the field, whenever there was an event and the teams were allowed to talk you both never talked together by yourselves, always just in a group of people but you always found yourselves looking at one another.

It drove your teammates insane.

Then when the next season arose you were told you would be put on loan to Arsenal, just for a season to let you have more experience with other players as you took over for Leah Williamson as she was out with an ACL injury. You were Manchester blue through and through.

You would be welcome back at any time.

When the news was announced you got many supportive messages from both red and blue teams. Steph, your captain wishes you luck, some of the younger girls shuttered you wouldn’t be there to sneak them treats at games, and some of the Arsenal girls were excited about your arrival.

You quickly become friends with Katie, also already being friends with your Australian teammates.

You were very excited when Viv’s name popped up on your phone late at night.

Viv_miedema: Welcome to Arsenal, I’m very happy you're on my team now even if it is just for a short while (:

You blushed and replied, thanking her.

It wasn’t long until you were training, film camera near you to document your first training. It wasn’t too bad, you were comfortable, but you had to stop yourself from yelling out the wrong names at certain times.

Katie laughed at you when you stuttered with a name but Viv slyly walked from behind and whispered their name from behind you.

“Vivvy the hero” Katie cooed before the tall women walked away, unbeknownst to you with blushed cheeks.

The first week was over and you had opted to sit out on the first game, choosing to sit next to Leah on the bench so you both could analyse and she could teach you more about the team. You were scared the English Captain would not want to help you, scared you would be replacing her but she was nice.

She wanted what was best for her team and she knew it was you.

Your homework session had worked when at training you had easily gotten the ball off a majority of your teammates and kicked it away.

Viv watched you with a smile, determination written on your face.

Katie, her defender scoffed “What?” Viv asked “I can’t believe I didn’t notice this until now,” she said and Viv quirked her brows “What?” she questioned again and Katie gave her a deadpan look “You have a crush on City” she said, using her nickname she gave you.

Viv widened her eyes “No” her voice grew quiet “and Katie covered her mouth in shock “Oh my god you actually fucking do” she said, excitement taking over her as Viv slapped her arm “Shoosh” she shushed Katie.

“How long?”

“We are at training.”

“Balls at the other end”

“Katie” Viv grumbled and Katie laughed, already scheming in her mind.

You were happy in the training, making sure to high-five Leah who laughed at the energy you still had.

Caitlin slapped your back in the changing room as you were untying your shoes “I have an idea” she started off and you shook your head “No, your ideas suck”

“This is a good idea I promise,” she told you and you looked at Steph for help who looked away “Don’t drag me into this”.

You sighed and sat up “what is it?”

“Wanna come on a double date with me?” she asked and you stood up to walk away but she grabbed your wrist, sitting you back down “Please? She asked again, giving you puppy eyes and you sighed “Who is it?” you asked, and the girl clapped her hands, excitedly.

She never told you who the girl you were going on a date with looked like she just told you it was one of Katie's friends, which made you feel a bit better. Katie had a good eye and would only befriend people with good intentions.

“Not that I want to start dating a total stranger but how do I look?” you asked Caitlin and Steph who were sitting on the couch waiting for you to finish getting ready.

You wore a simple pair of denim jeans and a nice-fitting top that sat nicely around your arms. Your hair was up but it was curled.

“You look nice” Steph smiled and Caitlin smirked at her phone “You might need to bring a jacket” Steph yelled out when you turned to your room “No!”

“Your date must give you theirs”.

“I might just put one in the car though, girls are usually the same size so it won’t be oversized Stephy,” you said, using hand gestures to make Caitlin laugh “I’m just trying to romanticize this up a little bit okay, leave me alone”

“All right, we will cause we got to go”.

You played with your fingers in the car, tempted to text Viv asking her to pick you up as Caitlin drove.

The more you thought about it the more you wanted to be in her presence rather than a random girl you had never met in North London.

“Here”

You looked up to Caitlin who looked back at you with a smile, comforting you “Okay” you replied and walked out of the car “Katie and the girl is already there” Caitlin told you as you both walked in “Why don’t you use her name-“ you trailed off before you saw a smirking Katie and a dazed Viv.

“What?” Caitlin smirked “You didn’t think I picked up on your little crush, I’ve noticed this since you were still at City”

“I’m going to kill you,” you told her before you walked up to the two girls “hey babe,” Caitlin said, kissing Katie on the cheek as you and Viv looked at each other “uh hi” you blushed and Viv’s hands rubbed over her thighs “Hi” she smiled back.

Katie and Caitlin looked at you both hesitantly, scared they had crossed a line but when you sat down and filled both of your cups with water they knew they had just given you the right push you both needed.

Now for their last step.

“I actually wasn’t feeling that good” Katie piped up and Caitlin placed her hand on top of yours “Really, should we get you back home?”

Caitlin definitely was not an actor.

“Yeah maybe” Katie sighed, and Viv turned around “Should I take you back?” she asked and Katie shook her head “I drove so I can take her back myself,” Caitlin said “You two stay, Viv can drive you back later,” Katie said before they both quickly got up and walked away, you and Viv watched as they giggled with each other through the window.

“Do they know-“ “No they definitely do not” Viv answered your question as you both laughed “How are you?” you asked the girl who sat up “You don’t want to leave?” she questioned and you shook your head “I mean we’re already here and Caitlin left her card” you smirked, holding up the card that your friend had left on the table.

Viv smirked and then laughed “That’s good because I didn’t want to leave either,” she said and you blushed “Well that’s good”.

You both would label that as your first date, even if it wasn’t planned by the both of you but it didn’t stop you both from going on more. It was on the fourth date that Viv acted differently and it worried you a bit, she was short with her answers and kept on fumbling with her hands.

It was in the car when you figured out “Are you okay?” You asked and she furrowed her eyebrows “Of course” she said and you nodded “You’re just acting a little bit weird I guess” You shrugged and Viv opened her mouth to answer but nothing came out “Viv?” you asked and she shook her head “Can you close your eyes?” she asked with a blushed face, she usually wasn’t the one to blush so you smiled “okay” you obliged and closed your eyes, facing her.

You felt her soft hands grasp your chin and your lips parted at the feeling before she leaned her lips to yours, you smiled before reaching your own hands out to her and pulling her a bit closer as you kissed for the first time, you both smiled into the kiss and only leaned away when you both had to breathe.

“You don’t have to be nervous to kiss me” you assured her and pulled her in again and she graciously kissed you back.

Since Viv technically kissed you first, you decided you would be the one to pop the question for the Dutchie to be your girlfriend. It was on a rare free day and instead of being incognito at the men's City game, you took her to the restaurant where you went on your first date.

“This is cute” Viv hummed as you took her to the same table you sat at the first time, still with two spare seats next to you to represent your missing friends.

You fumbled with your rings the entire time as you waited for the right time to ask her but Viv being the most observant person ever reached her hands out to yours, covering them “Are you okay?” she asked and you nodded your head “yep” you said, your voice squeaky.

Viv quirked her brow at you, not believing you and you took a deep breath “I was just wondering” you said before Viv smiled at you, calming you “If you would like to be my official girlfriend?”

Viv squeezed your hands and smiled “I thought you would never ask” she teased you “You knew!” you realized and she shrugged “Katie is very bad at keeping secrets”.

Viv felt like home.

So when your loan had finished and you had to choose between City and Arsenal you chose to stay at Arsenal for another six months on a contract.

You watched as one night Viv landed weirdly on her knee, her knee had been bothering her weirdly and this would definitely not help. Then when she had felt slightly better Jonas put her back on the field.

You hoped it wouldn’t be too early.

And It almost felt like everything would be fine, especially when she shot a goal against Liverpool, you were quick to run from the other end of the field to jump in her arms.

“I’m so proud of you” you whispered into her ear and used your arms to hide yourself kissing the side of her neck.

She laughed, squeezing you and light-heartedly telling you to get back to your position.

Then she was sent off, Alessia going on for her, you saw her wobble on her knee.

You went off shortly after, subbing on for Leah as she had returned from injury.

You sat next to her on the bench, laying your jacket over both of your legs before reaching your hand down to draw circles on her knee which she nodded at you..

You should’ve seen the signs from Jonas that he was trying to ice Viv out and you hated yourself for not. You held her in her house when she sobbed into your shirt, scared that her knee was going to end her career.

All you could do was hold her.

You were frustrated for her, even when her knee was healed Jonas still didn’t play her, at first you thought it was out of fear but it wasn’t until the last Everton game you realized it could be because he just purely didn’t want to.

You were near the boundary line, watching as Viv stood up, ready to go on and you smiled at her, she smiled back with a nod. Fans cheered as they thought Viv was returning to the field and so did you.

Your smile fell as you watched Jonas walk up to her and pull her back forcefully, turning her to the bench.

You felt hot, anger that had been bubbling had now spilled over, all you saw was red and it wasn’t because you had Arsenal girls surrounded before you.

“Oi!” you yelled out to Jonas as Viv also defended herself “Touch her like that again and I’ll fucking quit! You want to win? Put her on!”

You ran away back to your position, immediately regretting your actions as Katie patted your back “I’m sorry” you said and she crossed her head “Don’t be” was all she said before running back to her spot.

Jonas took you off after the next goal, Lotte going on after you.

You felt defeated as you looked at your manager, tears pricking at your eyes as you could’ve just possibly ruined your career. You were only brought back into reality when a comforting hand grabbed yours.

Viv who also had tears in her eyes “Can we leave?” you ask and she nodded as you both shook hands with your teammates on the bench and walked through the tunnel to go home.

When you reached Viv’s home she turned to you, locking the doors.

“How long do you have left of your contract?” she asked and you threw your head back, trying to remember “End of the season”

“He’s not giving me a new contract” she admitted and you shot up “Viv-“ “City always said they’d have you back right?” she asked and you nodded your head “I get reminded every transfer season”

“I’m leaving Arsenal,” she said as if it was the first time she had admitted it to yourself.

“I don’t want to be at Arsenal if there’s no you,” you told her and she smiled, tears now starting to run down her face “What about at City?” Viv asked and you smiled “really?” you ask and she nodded

“I want to play with you- I want to stay with you.”

[wavesoutbeingtossed]

.

[lizard-on-a-window-pane]

hii! welcome back!! i love love love your writing:)

i’m not sure if you’ve written something like this but the reader is stressed over studying for an exam, she’s in the library until very late at night when one of the marauders (i can’t decide who, you can choose!) finds her dozed and trying to force herself to stay awake. then he finds out she hasn’t been eating properly. then he asks “are you okay?” and that’s what it takes for her to break down into tears? sorry if this is weird! i’m usually a silent reader. so mostly just a lot of angst and comfort, then fluff? thank you for taking time to read this! it’s okay if you can’t write it!

thank you so so much again! so glad you requested 😊 really hope you like it!!

pairing: Remus Lupin x reader word count: 1.4k description: fluffy; i left it up to you a bit at what stage you read their relationship

All the words finally made sense. It was like a puzzle. And it all fit together just like this. Or wait was it a different way? Should you go back to that first thread or follow this new one? Wait what was the first one again? There were some words. You couldn’t remember the words, but you knew how important it was that you put them in the right order…

“Sweetheart…”

What?

“Sweetheart…” you hear again.

You open your eyes and see a bunch of crowded words on parchment right in front of you. You realize you’d fallen asleep on your notes, that they’d bled into your stress dreaming. 

“There you are.” The voice is warm and gentle. You know it.

“You fell asleep, love. It’s late. Thought it was weird I never saw you come back, so I came to look for you.” 

“Remus?”

“Yeah, pretty girl. It’s me. Wake up.” 

You sit up, and Remus adjusts your hair and jumper for you as you rub at your face. 

“I was studying.”

“I know,” he chuckles. “But I think you need some rest now, don’t you?”

“Don’t I need some rest, or don’t I think so too?”

Remus laughs softly. 

“Too clever for your own good. Get out of study mode, lovely,” he tells you, bringing his hand to your head and scratching your scalp playfully.

You lean into it on instinct, loving his touch and his comfort after a long, lonely day in the library. Remus had wanted to study with you or at least keep you company, knowing how stresses out you were about this upcoming exam, but you told him he was too distracting and you’d find him later. That must’ve been many hours ago. 

Remus notices you shifting into his touch, and he slides his whole body closer to you. 

“Hey, you okay?” he whispers. 

“I..” you start, thinking “I’m fine” will come out automatically as it always does. But it gets stuck in your throat. It gets stuck on a lump there that is making itself more and more felt. 

“I…” you try again, but this time your voice completely cracks. 

“Hey, hey, come here, sweetheart. It’s okay,” Remus responds, bringing you into his embrace. He holds your head to his chest, wraps his other arm around you, caressing your back. 

You immediately start sobbing. 

“It’s alright,” he keeps repeating. He holds you close and pets you more intensely. 

“I’m sorry,” you mumble through panting breaths into his jumper. 

“It’s okay,” he says quickly in his warmest tones. “There’s nothing to be sorry for. I’m just sorry I didn’t come look for you earlier.”

“Ugh, I’m so embarrassed,” you admit, pulling back and wiping your face with your sleeves, not feeling brave enough to look him in his warm brown eyes. “You shouldn’t need to take care of me. I should be able to do that myself. I just got a little carried away. I don’t know why I’m freaking out so much over this exam.” 

He shakes his head gently at you and brings his hands to either side of your face, lifting it to look into his and caressing your cheeks with his thumbs. 

“There’s nothing embarrassing about caring a lot, Y/N. You wouldn’t be you if you didn’t,” he smiles adoringly. “And there’s nothing wrong with needing people, love. I’m happy to be here for you. I just wish you’d let me.” 

You nod slightly and manage to keep his gaze. 

“I’m sorry,” you repeat. 

“No more of that. You don’t have to be sorry, okay?”

“Okay…” 

“I mean it, Y/N,” he says with a gentle firmness only Remus could deliver. 

“Okay,” you say more certainly. 

“Good.” 

He kisses your forehead quickly then goes to pack up your stuff. As he’s stacking your notes, your stomach makes a low rumble. Just when you thought you couldn’t be more embarrassed. 

“When’s the last time you ate?” His tone is chiding but teasing. 

“We had that pie…” 

“With me?!” he startles. You nod. 

“Baby, that was ages ago. Come on, we’ll find you something.” 

Remus takes your bag, just tssking at your pathetic objection as he adjusts the strap on his shoulder. He takes your hand, and you walk out of the library together. 

You walk in silence, but just Remus’s presence next to you gives you a quiet peace you’d definitely been missing. You lean your head on his shoulder the rest of the way, and he can’t stop his subtle smile the entire time.

When you get to the common room, he sits you down on the sofa, rubbing your shoulders dotingly and kissing the crown of your head before standing straight up. You’re confused why he’s not already sitting next to you. 

“I’ll be right back, okay?” You pout at his words. “I know, I’ll be quick, sweetheart; I promise.” He turns to go then turns back to you. “Those notes better still be stuffed in your bag when I get back.” He points a finger at your bag then at you, and you giggle and nod. He wags his finger a bit in emphasis, staring at you hard, then turn and bounds up the stairs toward the boy’s dormitories. 

It’s a mere couple of minutes later you hear him bouncing back down, but you’re confused to hear multiple sets of footsteps. You turn and see Remus walking back toward you and Sirius walking toward the door. 

“Hi, Y/N/N,” says Sirius. “So needy, aren’t you?” he teases then is out the door. 

“Where’s he going?” you ask Remus as he settles in next you. 

“He’s going to sneak into the kitchens for us.” You go to object, but Remus softly places his fingers on your lips. “He’s happy to, lovely. No matter how much he denies it, Sirius is a sweetheart.” 

“I know he is, Rem, but I really hate being all this trouble. All over a little exam.”

“It’s a big exam and very little trouble. We’re your friends, Y/N. When are you going to let us be here for you as much as you’re here for us?” 

“I don’t know,” you whisper honestly. You look down and are mortified to feel on the brink of tears again. Godric, you really did need some sleep.

“Hey, don’t cry,” Remus starts, but quickly adds, “Or do, if you need to. Just do what you need to do, and I’m here, okay?” 

He’s the sweetest person alive, you think, and you throw yourself into his arms. He chuckles at your affection but returns it immediately. You shift till his arms are around you, and you lift your legs into his lap, which he lovingly welcomes, pulling you close. 

“You’re really kind, Rem, you know that?”

 “Am I? Not doing much really.” 

“I’ll start letting you help me with things when you start taking my compliments,” you say through a strained, tired smile. 

“I’ll work on it,” he cedes.

You sit in silence together, the fire crackling nearby, Remus’s hands caressing you, and you find yourself dangerously close to sleep. Your eyes feel really heavy, keeping them open a struggle in vain. 

Remus feels you tense up every once in a while before slowly relaxing into him again. 

“It’s okay, baby,” he whispers into your hair. “Just rest, okay? When Sirius gets back, we’ll have something to hold you over, and then I’m sending you to bed.” 

“I don’t wanna go to bed.” You sound like a little kid, and he chuckles at you. 

“You have to rest, Y/N. No more studying tonight.” 

“I wasn’t gonna,” you say, your voice slurred with sleep. “I don’t wanna go to bed because I want to be with you.” Even in your sleepy state, you register Remus tense slightly at this clarification. 

“You’re the only thing that’s relaxing, Rem,” you go on. Your exhaustion is making you honest, your lacking the energy to over-think and filter. “You’re so warm and sweet, and I like how you care about me… and how you smell.” You nuzzle into his jumper. 

Remus is quiet, but he squeezes your body against his. Then softly, before you fall asleep, you hear his whisper, “Yeah, I care about you, darling. Adore you actually. More than anything.” A beat. “Okay, sweet girl. If this is how you’ll fall asleep, I’ll hold you all night.” He kisses your head again and adds, “I’ll hold you for forever if you’ll let me…”

[storiesofsvu]

Decadent Desires Ch 4

Emily Prentiss x reader warnings: language, alcohol, sexually charged conversations and situations, minor kinks slightly explored. Happy (early) Birthday @d33pd3sire-blog !! I hope you have a wonderful day!🩵🩵 (thank you for the kofi)

Emily was blessed with gorgeous weather when she woke up the following Friday, the sun cascading though the sky, flooding the city with the perfect warmth that would last through until the evening. She was pleasantly surprised that she was feeling considerably less nervous about tonight than she had been about your original meeting. Not that she had any better idea what she was doing or about to get herself into, but that she knew you were going to be a much better match. On top of finding you physically attractive she also enjoyed spending the evening with you, the conversation had flowed smoothly, you were smart, quick witted and there was an underlying hint of sexuality that you’d kept just beneath the first layer, ready to reveal once the discussion had finally shifted in that direction. And that was one she was more than eager to explore.

She made sure to arrive at the Conrad with more than enough time to spare, checking in and dropping off whatever she didn’t need in the suite before heading back down to the Summit. The rooftop lounge had an extensive cocktail menu, delectable food offerings and incredible views of downtown D.C. and The Capitol. She grabbed a table and ordered a glass of wine while she waited, looking through all the options on their menu.

The sound of your infectious laugh was what pulled her attention upwards a few minutes later, looking up to find you chatting with the hostess, gesturing in the direction of her table. You had a simple yet gorgeous plum cocktail dress on, the top dipping down to show more cleavage than the last time she’d seen you, the bodice nicely fitted while the skirt flared out. Your hair was loose, curled nicely and your makeup darker, more seductive as you gave her a little wave with a grin before walking over to the table.

“Hope I wasn’t keeping you.” You smiled.

“No, not at all.” She stood from the table, giving you the opportunity to take in her full outfit, form fitting dress pants and a gorgeous red blouse that showed off the curve of her chest perfectly. Her hand landed on your elbow as the two of you leant in, kissing cheeks before you slid into the other chair.

“How was the week?” You asked, picking up the cocktail menu to look through.

“Surprisingly good.” Emily replied, nearly confusing herself at the realization, “got a few of our snags figured out and the pile of papers in my inbox is finally smaller than the outbox.”

“Sounds like you need an assistant.” You teased from across the table, and she huffed a laugh.

“Unfortunately, I don’t think the bureau would like it too much if my signature was forged on everything.”

“Well at least you managed to catch a break.” You offered and she nodded.

By the time the server came by the two of you had managed to shake off any early jitters, slipping into an easy rhythm of conversation. You got a glass of sangria and Emily ordered the cheese and charcuterie plates, tempura shrimp, and scallops to share.

“So, I know you’ve been all over,” you started, taking a sip of your drink, “why choose D.C. to settle?”

“It’s a long story.” She chuckled, “but there were people I wanted to be close to, a few things to keep an eye on here. Just so happened to be close to Quantico.”

“Were you always interested in some form of law enforcement?”

“It was more about helping people, learning how to fully understand the whole psychology of it, why they do what they do. I was always interested in more than just chasing down the bad guys.”

“I’m curious then… why return to the BAU from Interpol?” You asked and Emily’s head titled.

“You know about Interpol?”

“You’re not the only one who knows how to run a background check.” You chuckled, “you may be the fed, but I still like to vet who I spend my personal time with, especially behind closed doors.”

“You’re smart.” She smiled, “I like that.”

“So?” You raised a brow, “what made Washington so much more appealing than London?”

“I missed it. That team had been my family for years and I wanted to come back to them. I knew there was a potential offer hiding in the wings that wouldn’t demote me in a sense and I wanted to help out an old friend. He only trusted me with the job, and I didn’t want the team to fall into jurisdiction of someone who wouldn’t do it justice or only wanted to disband them.”

“How’d you like Unit Chief compared to now?”

“Honestly I think I prefer it.” She laughed, “though I wouldn’t dream of stepping back down into it for the same reasons I took it in the first place.”

“Last thing you want is Bailey directly in charge of your team.” You grinned and she rolled her eyes.

“He’s got his claws deep enough in already.” She groaned.

“Too many politics involved with Section Chief I assume?” You raised a brow and she nodded, a look of near melancholy in her eyes as she switched her gaze to look out on the horizon. “You miss being out in the field, don’t you?”

“Paperwork is menial. And tedious. And so much of it seems entirely fucking pointless. When we were all mainly working from home still, it at least kept me occupied, tied to the job, like I still had a purpose. But now we’re back in the office, my team gets to run off into the face of danger and I’m stuck with the pencil pushers attending meetings that are entirely redundant. The only time I end up opening my mouth is to remind them the BAU is an integral part of the bureau, and they shouldn’t shut it down.”

“Sounds like it’s definitely about time you have yourself some fun.” You rested your chin on the back of your hand, a smirk on your lips and Emily chuckled. When she looked up at you, you could see her eyes darkening just the slightest.

“I suppose it is.”

You were interrupted before things could move further, plates of food now scattered across the table that you were both picking through, loading up your own side plates to get a little bit of everything.

“You mentioned UCONN last time.” Emily started, taking a sip of her refilled wine, “are you from Connecticut or did you just go to school there?”

“Born and raised, figured I may as well take advantage of a rent free college experience while I could.”

“Did you know Heather back then or was it just sheer coincidence?”

“Our parents ran in the same circles.” You replied with a huff, taking a bite of food and you noticed the very brief change of expression on Emily’s face before she managed to conceal it and you laughed. “Before you ask, no I’m not drowning in wealth. The Dunbar’s come from very old money and they’ve always been smart about it, they know how to invest, how to make money into even more money. I’ve never been able to understand it.”

“I assume your parents didn’t either?” She asked and you practically snorted.

“Not in the least. They liked to pretend they knew wealth, shove their way into all the fancy places and while the façade was enough to win over most people, it all came from an inheritance my mother got. Could have been worth something if my father wasn’t blowing it all away on fast cars while mother spent all of her days at the casino chain smoking, binge drinking and consistently losing.” You sighed, taking a large sip of wine, “I’m lucky there was enough left for my college education.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be.” You shrugged, “the discrepancies between our bank accounts doesn’t mean the Dunbar’s were better parents or anything.”

“Oh, I’ve heard.” Emily chuckled.

“What about you? Good relationship with your parents?”

“It’s… complicated.”

“So, no?” You laughed, pulling one from her.

“Mother travels a lot for work, she isn’t based here. We tried to kinda work through things when I was younger but between our careers it just never happened, and I’m fine with that. Spares me the lecture about still not being married or giving her grand kids.”

You let out a louder laugh, “why does it seem that that’s any mom’s only concern with their kid’s lives? There’s more than one way to succeed and be happy and in my opinion that’s all that really matters.”

“Exactly.” Emily smiled across at you, “there’s so much more to be concerned about.”

“Mmm!” You suddenly changed gears as you took your first bite of a scallop, “these are incredible.”

“You haven’t had them?” She raised a brow, “I assumed you’ve been here before.”

“Yeah, Conrad’s a pretty high choice of stay for any visiting politician but I’ve only ever had time for drinks. Try them.” You urged, breaking off another piece on your fork and holding it up to her, your other hand cupped underneath it so it wouldn’t drip on the table. She barely hesitated, lips wrapping around the fork as you gently pulled it out of her mouth, not even blinking before scooping up the last bite into your own mouth on the same utensil.

“Oh my god.” She mumbled over the food, “you weren’t kidding.”

“You’ll learn to trust my suggestions sooner or later, I’m sure of it.” You grinned at her across the table.

“I have no doubt, you wouldn’t guide me astray, now would you?”

“Wouldn’t dream of it.” You smirked across the table at her, and Emily felt a tingle shoot through her body.

A few minutes later the server came by to clear the dinner plates and offer a dessert menu that you turned down, feigning to the server that you’d had enough, and Emily asked for the cheque.

“Not a sweets fan?” She asked, polishing off her wine and you chuckled over the rim of your glass.

“I prefer to get my sugar a different way.”

“So you are interested in moving this upstairs?”

“Well, I sure hope so. I was bargaining on more than just dinner tonight.” Your lips turned upwards in a sly smile that Emily returned, slipping her credit card back into her wallet.

She guided you up to the ninth floor, letting you into the suite first. A small entry way opened up on the left into a large studio space, a breakfast bar splitting up the counter where the microwave and fridge were and the sitting area. A circular table with two chairs, a small sectional that faced the television and a thin divider that hid the bedroom space, the bathroom connected to that.

“Help yourself.” Emily gestured toward the bottle of wine on the breakfast bar, and you wasted no time in pulling down two glasses from a cupboard to fill up. Sliding one across the counter to her you settled in on a stool, unsurprised when she returned with a file folder in hand. “To be completely honest, I’m not even really sure how to do this part.” She let out a slightly awkward laugh and you hummed.

“Don’t overcomplicate it. Think of it as a business transaction with a little bit of negotiation.”

“I guess that’s actually a good place to start.” She took a sip of wine, “I think the first step should be letting you know that this is exactly that, a business transaction. It’s casual, and I don’t want you to think of it as an exclusive relationship. I’m busy, we’re both busy, if you happen to see someone else that’s more than okay as long as everything is done safely.”

“Understood.” You slipped a sheet of paper from your purse, sliding it across to her before resting your chin on the back of your hand. “I figured you’d want a clean bill of health.”

“Thank you.” She tucked it into the back of the folder, “I guess money would be the next step?”

“I’ll save you the headache.” You snagged the agreement from her, eyes scanning the page until you found the blank lines to be filled in about allowance and picked up a pen. “I’m also giving you one hell of a deal, considering I don’t need to do this for money my rates are extremely low.”

“Noted.” She laughed.

“Considering our schedules I’m going to veto the allowance and say we just do a price per date, there’s likely weeks we’re not going to see each other, and I want things to be fair. One hundred for casual dinner and drinks or something of the equal amount of time that’s simply companionship.” You began to scraw notes out on the agreement, “two hundred for a date night and sex. Three for anything longer than a standard date and if you drag me to any of those horrendous FBI galas, I’m tacking on another hundred.”

She barked out a laugh, “more than understandable.”

“I expect you to pick up the tabs most nights, but if there ever is a day that I plan or invite you out onto, don’t feel obligated. Then treats and gifts are obviously welcomed and encouraged but that is up to your discretion, think of them as rewards.”

“And you’re sure about those rates?”

“Considering the costs hotel rooms like this will run you? Absolutely.” You laughed softly.

“Do you have preferences when it comes to gifts?” She asked and you scrunched your nose.

“Not particularly? Gift cards and cash obviously work, I could use a few new pairs of shoes, a dress or two, jewelry’s always nice, standard date type gifts. Could definitely use some new lingerie sets, and I mean…” you glanced over to her, that sly smile back on your cheeks, “new toys are always fun.”

“I do not disagree with you there.” She grinned back, “so let’s talk sex.”

“I am curious, is this about you needing to get off, relieve some of that stress and relax for once, or will you be the one fucking me into next week.”

“Christ.” Emily muttered, the tingling in her body moving lower, surveying you with a gleam in her eye. “I was thinking a mutual benefit but to be blunt I’m the one wearing the strap more often than not and I have no qualms with fucking you into next month.”

It was your turn to feel the fire prickling under your skin, heading south as you tried not to shift too obviously in your chair, “a confident woman with a cock? I love it.”

“You won’t be disappointed.” She assured you and you huffed a small laugh.

“I’m sure I won’t.” You took another sip of wine, “so let’s talk kinks. I’ll tell you right now the hard off the table ones are piss play, scat play, major pet play, age play, I’m not really into anything involving food in the bedroom and please nothing involving feet.”

“You can count yourself safe from all of that.” Emily laughed, pulling a warm smile from you, “I personally don’t like being restrained or blindfolded, but I have no issues tying you up.”

“As long as you’re not using work issued cuffs.” You noted.

“Do I dare ask?” She raised a brow in your direction.

“I dated a local cop in college, those things hurt.”

“Oh, I know.” She laughed back, “I’m partial to silk ties, it’s nice to keep things pretty.”

“Agreed.” You smiled at her before glancing back down at the agreement, flipping through the pages and she watched as your brow furrowed.

“What?”

“There’s nothing in here about how to address you.” You looked back up at her.

“I thought we went over that last week.” She laughed, “just Emily is fine.”

“No ma’am?” You asked and she was very quick to shut you down.

“God, please no.”

“Most women like the title mistress, or mommy.”

“Oh…” Emily’s nose scrunched, “I guess I hadn’t thought about that….”

“I mean some do go with daddy if you’re more inclined.”

“Is that like, an all the time thing? Or just in the bedroom?”

“Could be either. I’ve heard of relationships where it’s constant and I do find that over the top but every once in a while in bed, it’s kinda hot. I mean after all, one really just wants to be a good girl for mommy.”

Emily paused, letting your words sink in for a moment as she tried to figure out how she felt about the whole thing, especially considering she was about to be your sugar mommy.  “Let’s… bookmark it for later.” She looked up at you, catching a small nod but it was the wicked smirk on your face that caught her attention first, “what?”

“Nothing.” You shook your head, “I’m just not that surprised you might be intrigued. I heard you had quite the fun time entertaining Benjamin Reeves last month.”

“Oh god…” Muttering, she dropped her head, running her hand over her face and you let out a playful laugh.

“Walls really do talk.” You teased, flipping through the rest of the file, “speaking of…there’s no NDA in here?”

“I didn’t think it was necessary.” She shrugged, “there’s a piece near the end saying anything involving my work that comes up in conversation isn’t to be publicly aired anywhere but that’s all I really need.”

“Well,” finding the piece you scrawled your signature under it, “you don’t have to worry about me running to the press. Your secrets are safe with me.” You flipped the papers back in order and closed the file, sliding it back across the counter to Emily before scooping up your wine glass to walk around the counter. “Now… I do believe we’re done with the boring part…”

You approached her where she sat on the stool, your wine glass coming to rest on the counter only an inch from her own as her body turned toward you. Her hand found your waist, nudging you closer to her so you could slot yourself between her legs while she leant forward, her free hand brushing your hair back from your face. You could feel her breath hot on your skin, lips parting ever so slightly as you leant in, eyes flicking from her own down to her mouth, the distance about to be closed when there was a sudden, very loud, and repetitive buzzing on the counter.

Emily groaned, her eyes falling shut as her head fell back and you let out an annoyed huff.

“I swear to god if that’s fucking Heather I’m resigning.” You reached towards your phone at the same moment she did.

“Nope, it’s me.” She opened the screen, groaning again as she read the text messages, “and I have got to go.”

“Political crap or serial killer?”

“Serial killer.” She stood from the stool, her hand squeezing your wrist while she leaned, kissing your cheek quickly.

“Go save the world.” You raised your wine glass in a salute to her as she grabbed her bag from the couch.

“Please, finish the wine, feel free to stay.”

“I’ll take the bottle home.” You replied.

“I’m sorry.”

“No need.” You assured her with a soft smile, “next time.”

“Oh. Guaranteed.” She nodded, “get home safe. I’ll text you when we’re back.”

“I look forward to it.”

With another apologetic smile she was gone from the suite, leaving you to dump the remnants of her wine glass into yours, wandering up to the window to take in the city views as you finished it.

_______________

@mickey-gomez @momlifebehard @daddy-heather-dunbar @maybe-a-humanbean @rustyzebra @leftoverenvy @kades95 @dextur @supercriminalbean @emilyprentisssluvr @lex13cm @zizzlekwum @emobabeyy @riveramorylunar @scorpsik @onmykneesformarvel @inlovewithemilyprentiss @regalmilfs4me @ara-a-bird @five-bi-five-mind @inlovewithmiddleagewomen @hotchs-bitch @ollysmulti @kmc1989 @irishavengersassemble @hopedoesntknow @venromanova @waitaminuteashh @noahrex @imlike-so-gaydude @wittygutsy @cx-emerald-cx @momily @nilaues @borinxnovak @soverign @v3nusxsky @blackbird-brewster @mccdreamys-writes @l4yne @obsessedwjill @supercorpstan97 @asolitaryrose3 @honeyycatt @trauma-factory @lisqueen @mrs-prentiss @whitewinewithice

[lenoraah]

𝙗𝙞𝙧𝙩𝙝𝙙𝙖𝙮 𝙗𝙤𝙮

pairing - ollie bearman x reader

summary - reader finishes her finals and finally has time to visit her boyfriend, luckily his birthday is the same day her flight lands.

a/n - hi! this is my first motorsport x insert reader. i hope that it’s some what good and would really appreciate it if you have some feedback and would share it :)

★ ☆ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

”Y/n? What are you doing here?”

“Ah! Dino don’t scare me like that!”

“Sorry,” The brown haired boy smiles sheepishly as he puts his hands up in defense, making the groceries bags slide down onto his forearms. “But seriously what are you doing here?”

“I’m here for Ollie’s birthday since I just finished my finals. I thought it would be a good time since we haven’t seen each other in so long.” Y/n fails to hide the happy smile on her face and is clearly oblivious of the fact that her cheeks were a bright pink color.

The baby blue gift bag that is overstuffed with white tissue paper is being shifted from hand to hand is making it obvious to Dino that she is somewhat nervous even though her face is screaming happiness.

“That’s great. This is great. You’re great. Wait- no, I mean the fact that you’re here. Because Ollie hasn’t been able to stop talking about you all season. Also you are great. Sorry I’m so confused now,” Dino babbles as he shoves his key into the lock of his and Ollie’s current shared apartment. He pushes the door open with his back and drops the bags of groceries on the kitchen counter.

Y/n follows him inside and balances the gift carefully in one hand while the other is busy shimmying off her shoes. She hops on one foot into the living room as Dino shuts the door behind her.

Once she has finally managed to take off her shoes and set them by the door next to the pile of Dino and Ollie’s shoes, Y/n takes off her coat and draped it over a stool at the counter.

She looks at the mess sound the apartment and internally cringes. The mess of racing attire scattered on the sofa. The stacks of documents and notes on the coffee table. The helmet on the floor next to a random dark green dog leash. Not to mention lots of random things laying around everywhere.

“Ollie should be in his room,” Dino walks past the girl with a pile of clothes in his arms.

“Okay, thanks.”

“I’m will be downstairs trying to do my laundry. Call me if he not there,”

“Got it.” Y/n nods to herself and gives him a thumbs up. “And, Dino. Don’t use too much laundry detergent. You remember what happen last summer.”

“Yep, I know. It was fun and all but I don’t want to clean up all of that again.” Dino nods and snatches his keys off the counter.

Y/n stands there waiting for him to leave as Dino stands opposite of her with a basket of dirty laundry. He says one more thing about not wanting to hear any surprises when he comes back. The y/h/c girl nods and shoves him out of the door before he can say anything else.

After she hears the lock click and the faint sound of footsteps disappearing, Y/n takes a deep breath before quietly walking towards Ollie’s room.

The door is slightly open which is enough for her to see that her boyfriend is curled up in his bed. It amazes her that no matter how loud her and Dino were that he is completely unfazed.

Y/n opens the door just enough for her to get in. She sits on the edge on the bed and runs her hand up and down Ollie’s back.

The boy shifts before he slowly rolls over and scowls at her. He face immediately changes into a smile when he realizes who it is.

“Hi,” He mumbles as Y/n gently runs a hand through his brown curls.

“Hi, honey.” She smiles at him and Ollie grabs her by the waist and sits up as he pulls her next to him.

“What are you doing here?”

“It’s your birthday and I really wanted to see you. I missed you so much,��

“I could’ve come and visited you. You didn’t have to come all the way to Barcelona.”

Y/n chooses to ignore him before pressing a kiss on his forehead.

They sit with their backs against the bed headboard and stay in each other’s embrace for a while before Y/n reaches over to the nightstand and grabs the gift bag.

“I got you something,” Ollie takes the bag and puts it between them. He buries his face in her hair and presses a soft kiss on her cheek.

“You didn’t have too,”

“I know but it’s your eighteenth birthday so either it was mail you the gift or give it to you now.”

“Hm,”

“Go on, open it.”

“Okay,”

The boy slowly sets the tissue paper aside while looking at his girlfriend with an eyebrow raised.

Inside is a rectangular shaped wooden box with a painted red heart and a small cardboard box with a ribbon tied around it.

“What is this?” Ollie takes out the small cardboard box first and gives it a good look.

“I was in Ely shopping around on the weekend when I saw this little thing that reminded me of you.”

Y/n shrugs her shoulders with a cheeky smile on her face. Ollie opens the box and takes out a small cream colored bear shaped candle with a smile on its face with a bow around its neck .

“Y/n/n, love, no you didn’t.” Ollie let’s out a light chuckle as he looks at the candle.

“It’s cute, just like you.” Y/n taps his nose and tilts her head to the side with happy grin on her face.

Ollie’s cheeks flush a bright pink color as she teases him.

“What is this?” He takes the wooden box from the bottom of the bag and before he can unlatch the lock Y/n places her hand over his.

“Don’t open it yet,” Y/n gently takes his hand off and laces their fingers together.

“What is it?”

“It’s a bunch of letters I wrote you for different occasions when we can’t be together.” Y/n mumbles against his shoulder.

“This is really great. Really, really great. It’s like I’ll have a piece of you wherever I go.”

Y/n smiles and rubs his arm.

“I’m really glad that you like it.”

“I really do,” Ollie presses a kiss on her forehead. “I love you so much.”

“I love you too Ollie.”

He puts the two gifts back in the bag and sets it by the edge of the bed. Y/n curls under his arm and kisses the bare skin of his collarbone. She hides her face in his chest and takes in the smell of his cologne.

The same smell that she has missed for the past six months that she hasn't seen him.

“I’m really glad you’re here.”

“Me too,”

The couple stay in each other’s embrace and share longing and loving looks. They both might be trying to make a life for themselves and have goals they both want to achieve but they were making time for each other and that was important. The other person was important and they were not going to give them up.

“Happy birthday Ollie,”

[claymorexpunisher]

Brats Have More Fun (CH.8) (18+ Fic)

Pairing(s): Reader/Dominik Mysterio/Rhea Ripley

Disclaimer: This is NSFW and contains consensual kink. If that's not your thing, keep scrolling. I try to tag my work appropriately and if you still choose to click and read, do so at your own discretion... Thank you for the love always and I hope you enjoy!

Summary: Rhea introduces Dom to Fem. Reader during an outing at Reader’s club. Dom tries to talk big game, but Reader sees right through it.

Tag(s): 18+, Sub!Dominik, club owner!Reader, Fem Dom, orgasm denial, overstimulation, blowjob, handjob, pegging, dirty talk, begging, honorifics (“Miss”, “Mami”).

Chapter Word Count: 534

Dom has initially walked into my club talking big game.

He bragged up and down that he was a big man and that the stories that Rhea- his very own Domme. His Mami, who snickered knowingly at me as Dom spoke- had told him involving my job as a club owner/pro domme were just bullshit.

And that because I was much smaller than even Rhea, there was no way that I could get men much bigger than me to submit to let me do whatever I pleased to them.

“Nah, I don’t think you can handle me. Mami has a hard enough time.” Dom had joked, and Rhea and I had continued to laugh, Rhea’s eyes lighting up devilishly because she knew what the result by the end of the night would be.

Me? I took it as a challenge…

~~

“Please, Mamiii… Missss, it’s too much!… Please- shit..!”

A while later, Dominik realized he may have bitten off more than he could chew after Rhea and I brought him into one of the private bedrooms in my club.

“What number is this now?” Rhea asked, delighted with the vision that Dom made, lying on the bed, his legs draped around my hips as I pistoned my hips sharply and drove the strap-on dildo right upon his prostate over and over again.

Rhea was fully clothed, happy to just bring her face in between Dom and I’s bodies, and she busied herself with Dom’s cock and giving it a few lazy sucks and licks, making him shudder as she lapped up every bead of precum that still managed to dribble out of the reddened head with every pleasurable jab at his prostate.

She was careful to keep him right at the edge with me and we both chuckled at the disappointed sound Dom made when she pulled her mouth away from his cock again just to trail her tongue all the way up to his neck.

I smiled as Dom eagerly bared his neck to Rhea, giving her more access as she sucked on the tender flesh already littered with her claiming marks.

“Hmm.. we’re headed to number 5, I believe. It’s too much now, huh, baby?” I giggled softly as Dom gave me a jerky nod in response.

“Y-yeah, i-its too fucking much… Please!” He began to sob, but still didn’t utter his safeword.

His face was beautifully flushed, his eyes bleary with pleasure and his moans and pleas were now coming in a weak and almost raspy cadence, begging us to have mercy on him.

But his hips… fuck, his hips still tried to damnest to roll against mine in jerky motions, trying to work his cock in Rhea’s firm grip and taking me further into him at the same time, muttering soft curses and wondering outloud about how much it hurts yet felt so fucking good, until Rhea stop him with a firm hand over his stomach.

“I’m sorry, Mami- I’m sorry, Miss! I’m sorry, please don’t stop, please-” Dom began to babble and beg until Rhea and I shushed him.

“We’re not stopping until we feel like it. So don’t worry about that, Dom Dom.” Rhea smirked.

“Now, don’t move…”

@theworldofotps @alyyaanna @southerngirl @harmshake @mzv11

@letsgivethisonemoreshot @slutfortheeclaymore @auraravenora77 @niknakattack

@thesamoanqueen @moonwolfdemonprincess21 @babiidee @omegasshyghuleh6661ghosts @xndalynch

@84reedsy @romanstheory @kianaleani @elefrog25-blog @motherknuckers

@phantasmacabre @lxndonorris @girlnred @yo-yo89 @smile1318

@sassginaswanmills @exhaustedclown @aritannahrocks1300 @superlove167 @ayeeitsali

@queencherryberry @truefant4sy @codyswhitebelt @blackmeetsworld @salirophiliac

@kayfabebabe @rhea-the-eradicator @souleatermia @bittersweetastoria @domripley

@wrestlingprincess80 @myluvrrhea @viper-nightmare

[logically-asexual]

another outline for a fanfic i won’t write:

at some point in season 3/season 4 hawk moth and mayura come up with a plan to split up ladybug and cat noir and take them separately.

mayura gets cat noir and hawk moth gets ladybug. they both succeed (nathalie is struggling with the realization that adrien is cat noir but decides not to tell gabriel about it yet.) and they each come back with the jewels to the mansion.

there in his office gabriel is like okay give me the ring and nathalie is like. no. you give me the earrings.

so gabriel is like??? what no. you give me the ring now, it’s my wish. and nathalie is like fine i’ll give it to you but .. have you thought about who you’re going to sacrifice in exchange for emilie?

but of course gabriel hasn’t he’s just like i don’t care what the price is i want emilie back. so give me the ring. nathalie tells him that he has to choose someone because what if the kwami chooses for him? what if they choose to take gabriel in exchange. or worse. adrien.

so gabriel hesitates and then asks well then what did you have in mind. but nathalie doesnt answer and just insists that she’ll make the wish.

gabriel starts to get scared. he doesn’t know what she’s planning and how she refuses to tell him makes him more worried. so he starts carefully walking towards nathalie like okay okay let’s calm down. just tell me what i should do and i’ll make the wish. but nathalie is walking backwards with her fist tight around the ring.

eventually she says no and begins fighting him for the earrings. they’re struggle for a while but in their normal forms nathalie is way better at fighting because of her martial arts training so she manages to snatch the earrings away BUT gabriel is stronger than her as hawk moth so he transforms and is able to grab her by the wrists, take the miraculous (also the peacock), and pin her to the wall.

and he asks her to just tell him what she was thinking. she still refuses insisting that she will only make sure that he is happy with his family. in the middle of it gabriel realizes. that she wants to sacrifice herself.

gabriel tells her that he will absolutely not let that happen. but she argues that she’s already dying. that she already made this choice from the moment she picked up the peacock miraculous. and gabriel is shocked because he didn’t think that nathalie was actually so prepared to just die for their cause. he thought that she was just as convinced as him that when they had the wish they would save both her and emilie.

but now he realizes that that means not only one death he has to choose for the exchange but two. and the weight of someone actually dying is only now downing on him. he tells her no you can’t die. you’re important to adrien and I.. you’re.. you’re important to me too. if emilie comes back and she learns that i let you die in exchange she will hate me.

and nathalie is like well good luck with that because i’m dying anyway.

so it hits him. that yes the exchange is supposedly fair but it doesn’t feel fair. and also the fact that he somehow let nathalie feel like she’s so disposable, that she doesn’t want to live anymore if it means helping him with emilie. he says something about that, like, i can’t believe i made you feel that way. and. do you think adrien feels that way too? (as in. he feels that he’s not important enough, that his father would rather him dead than emilie)

nathalie thinks about adrien being cat noir and says no. he doesn’t feel that way because in contrast to her adrien has a future. he has goals and friends and purpose.

so then gabriel thinks for a while and eventually lets go of her. she’s tired so she falls to the floor while he calls tikki and plagg to reveal themselves and then gimmi. and he asks if he can make a deal with the kwami.

he says i want my wife back and the kwami says what are you willing to pay and he says that’s the thing. i know i would never give up on achieving that, no matter what i will always get what i want. i just did actually (the kwami also thinks of all the alternate timelines where he always wins and knows it’s true that he would never give up.) and gabriel says i will save my wife Unless. you make it so nathalie is no longer ill from the miraculous. then i’ll stop.

and the exchange is in fact equivalent because he’s exchanging emilie’s life, which he was fated to recover anyway, with nathalie’s life, which was fated to be lost since she was convinced to give it herself.

so the kwami accepts.

then the universe is destroyed and rebuilt and now emilie’s device thing that keeps her alive is gone, she’s buried in a cementery where she should have been, the kwamis have taken all the miraculous back to ladybug and gabriel and nathalie are just standing there in front of emilie’s portrait.

gabriel explains to nathalie that he realized he was being a hypocrite by telling her she couldn’t sacrifice herself while also letting her and even asking her to wear the broken miraculous. that he just hadn’t realized how much he was hurting her.

nathalie of course feels awful, like she has selfishly taken his chance away from him and also like she now has lost the single purpose she had in life so how is she going to keep on living?

gabriel holds her hand and tries to reassure her that he would also have hurt emilie with the knowledge that he took anyone’s life to bring her back, and she would hate him for it, as he would hate himself. and he tells her that now instead of having lost all purpose she has to see that she’s free to choose a new one, just like he will.

he smiles at her and she’s taken aback by the sight because he hasn’t smiled like that since emilie. nathalie says something about it being fine because her goal was for him to be happy again and it seems that there’s hope for that after all.

they hug and the end 🥰

[neocitybooty]

I Choose You. [M]

Genre: Smut, Office AU, Multiple Partners, Fluff, Angst, M/F

Pairing: Jaehyun x Johnny x Original Character

Word Count:  4.1k

Warnings: Oral sex, Sub/Dom dynamics, bodily fluids, masturbation, vulgar language, choking, rough sex, multiple partners, unprotected sex

Summary: Carmella requested a transfer within her company and moved to the other side of the world. She soon realizes she bit off more than she can chew once she starts working at the home branch...

A/N: This update took way longer than expected omg. I don't spend as much time on here as I'd like to. But I guess that's also a good thing because spending time with my friends and family is something that I doooooo enjoy. Once it gets cold out, my updates will be much more frequent lol. I had the draft sitting for about a week because I kept getting distracted lol but now I am here!! Please enjoy and happy comeback season!! Fact Check era seems like it is going to be extremely promising~

P.S. I have some goodies in the vault... hint(s)?? mark, jeno, haechan, doyoung

Chapter 10.

“We could just put our names together and name her something like Jaela. I think that’s cute.” Jaehyun was settled in between Mela’s legs, surrounded by lavender suds in their stand alone bathtub.

“I don’t know how you have managed to convince yourself that I am pregnant with a girl.” Mela ran her fingers through Jaehyun’s wet hair as he hummed in satisfaction.

“If you aren’t….well.. I don’t mind if we keep trying.” Jaehyun turned around and kissed Mela slowly. He smiled after pulling away and bit his lip. “There’s nothing else I’d rather spend my time doing.”

“Baby, we need to put sex on hold until we talk.” Mela wrapped her arms around Jaehyun’s neck and rubbed her nose against his.

He groaned in disapproval. Despite his protest, he repositioned himself. “You want to talk in here?”

Mela waited for a bit and thought to herself before responding. Jaehyun loved baths and he’d be more likely to be cooperative if the conversation was paired with something he found enjoyable.

“Yes, let’s just stay in here.” Mela said, playing with Jaehyun’s wet locks. He rubbed her knee gently and hummed as he sunk deeper into the water.

“So you’ve already made it clear that you know I left to see Johnny last night.” Mela started.

“Is that why you were so determined to get me to bed?” Jaehyun asked calmly. “I thought you were genuinely just horny.”

“Don’t be like that.” Mela said but still giggled at Jaehyun’s tone.

“I’m sorry but please don’t make me out to be the irrational boyfriend.” Jaehyun said, surprisingly still calm. “I think I have a good reason to be just a tad bit upset.”

“Jae, I always enjoy you. Please, let’s move away from that.” Mela shook her head but Jaehyun couldn’t see.

“Fine. Continue.” Jaehyun laid back onto Mela’s chest, a clear attempt to mentally center himself again.

“Eun Bi.” Mela said.

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” Jaehyun responded almost immediately.

“Well, that’s quite the response.” Mela said.

“You went to see Johnny to get information that you could’ve gotten from me..” Jaehyun said slowly.

“No, that’s not exactly true. There is some information that slipped past you.” Mela said. “I have evidence too.”

Jaehyun sat up and turned around to face Mela. “Where is it?”

“Aht aht. Not so fast.” Mela said with a wag of her finger. “We talk first.”

Jaehyun looked at Mela from bottom to top. “You’re so lucky I am madly in love with you.” He then rolled his eyes. Mela giggled and laid Jaehyun back onto her chest.

“Remember when I told you the company should take background checks a little more seriously?” Mela started.

“How seriously do we need to really take them? It’s Korea.” Jaehyun retorted.

“Well….if you had taken the background checks a bit more seriously, you would’ve caught that you had a pair of siblings in the system.” Mela told Jaehyun, slowly circling his Adam’s apple with her pointer finger.

“Pardon?” Jaehyun said from below Mela.

“Jae. Eun Bi’s sister. She works or rather….worked right under you..” Mela told Jaehyun softly.

Jaehyun was silent.

“Hey.” Mela leaned forward to get a look at his face. Jaehyun still said nothing. He zoned out, seemingly deep in thought. After five more seconds of silence, he finally spoke. “She would talk about her sister often. She seemed to be very fond of her.” His voice was low and he started to circle Mela’s knee with his thumb.

“Seems you and Eun-bi were actually quite close…” Mela slowly said.

Jaehyun stayed silent.

“Baby, you need to talk to me.” Mela said.

“I thought she was pretty and I made some stupid choices.” Jaehyun shook his head softly. “I never meant for any of this to happen.”

“Tell me everything.” Mela stroked his dark brown locks, as she softly spoke in his ear.

“Promise you won't inflate this.” Jaehyun replied sternly.

Mela rolled her eyes and sighed. She knew she couldn’t confidently promise but she tried anyway.

“I promise.”

“We went out for drinks one night after work, like usual. I already had my eye on her for a few weeks. But we didn’t talk much outside of work.” Jaehyun stopped once he felt Mela’s breath hitch. “Hey, maybe I shouldn’t-”

“No, it’s fine. Please continue.” Mela reassured him.

“Well….I offered to take her home once everyone started leaving. We had sex in the car and then we had sex again one more time in my office about a week later. She started acting weird after that so I figured it’d be for the best for me to end things.” Jaehyun said.

“Weird in what way?” Mela asked curiously.

“She became…obsessive.” Jaehyun started. “She would follow me…..constantly called and left so many voicemails. In her mind, I was her boyfriend. I thought it was very odd. We didn’t know much about each other. My only conclusion was that she wanted to marry me and gain access to wealth.”

“Jae…” Mela started.

“Carmella….it’s not like she would’ve been the first.” Jaehyun said with a sniffle.

“I’m sorry.” Mela backed down.

“There’s no need to apologize.” Jaehyun started to rub Mela’s knee again as he continued his story. “She found out she was pregnant and things became exponentially worse. She threatened to share the story with the news. Harassed my parents for days on end. It was madness.”

“My goodness. Really?” Mela’s eyes widened at the details.

“Yes, really.” Jaehyun shifted his body and Mela moved with him. “I eventually pulled her into my office and told her to stop and that her attempts were futile. I would never agree to commit to someone like her. After that day, I guess she never came back to work. We got the news about her passing about 2 weeks after our conversation…”

Mela said nothing and let the silence consume the entire room.

Jaehyun also kept quiet as his head slightly hung in shame.

“I don’t want you to have a bad image of me. I’m not the same man that I was before.” Mela felt Jaehyun sink into her again.

Mela wrapped her arms around Jaehyun’s shoulders and kissed his cheek. “You don’t have to explain yourself to me. I’m sorry, we don’t need to talk about this any further. I can show you everything. C’mon.”

“Thank God, we are this close to turning into raisins.” Jaehyun groaned and Mela giggled as he stood and she looked at his wet ass cheeks.

Once he wrapped a towel around his waist, he grabbed another one and held it open for Mela to walk into. He kissed her temple as he wrapped the towel around her and inhaled deeply. “The most intoxicating woman I’ve ever met. Thank you for accepting me, baby. I love you so much.”

Mela felt the butterflies form in her stomach as she let the taller man enclose her into a tight embrace. “I love you, too.” She replied softly

-

“So this is it, huh?” Jaehyun ran his fingers through his hair as he reviewed the papers from the manila envelope. “Fuck.”

He stopped and stared at the stills pulled from the security cameras and shook his head. He turned the pages over and put everything back into the envelope.

“I’ll call the legal team first thing tomorrow morning.” Jaehyun said before pulling Mela onto his lap.

Mela laid down and settled on Jaehyun’s chest and he chuckled softly to himself.

“Um, what’s so funny.” Mela asked him.

“Guess you had a good reason for going to see Johnny. Now I don’t have to beat his ass.” Jaehyun responded, a hint of amusement lacing his words.

“Yeah he told me about your past. You two sure are something.”

“He is actually just a sore loser. I was chosen fair and square. Like always.” Jaehyun said nonchalantly.

“I really didn’t think your head could get any bigger but here we are.” Mela propped herself up on Jaehyun’s chest with widened eyes as he stared at her while she made her statement.

“Well…you chose me.” Jaehyun said softly. “I think that counts…for a lot.”

“I…” Mela started, but she stopped once she made eye contact with Jaehyun. She was set to laugh but quickly realized he wasn’t joking. He gazed at her with a subtle bite lip. Half- lidded eyes conveyed want. Mela wanted to speak but she couldn’t. And she didn’t need to. Jaehyun slowly and softly guided Mela’s head toward his face and kissed her. She opened her eyes once they separated but said nothing.

He smiled and wrapped his arms around Mela, his leg wrapping around her as well. She smiled into his chest as he rubbed his chin on the top of her head.

“Jae?” Mela finally said into his arm. “How long until we return to work?”

“Well I am going to be returning very soon…..As for you..” Jaehyun trailed off.

“What do you mean by that?” Mela sat up and moved away from Jaehyun.

“Carmella….” Jaehyun said calmly. “I know we haven’t discussed it yet, but…I think I am going to have the company hire someone else for your position.”

Mela stood from the couch and threw a pillow at Jaehyun. “How dare you?!”

Jaehyun sighed and stood from the couch, as well. He walked towards Mela and once he was within reach, he wrapped his arms around her waist loosely and looked into her eyes as he spoke. “I know this isn’t ideal for you but babe….please. I need you to just trust me. We will talk about it some more.”

“You don’t understand.” Mela said, her voice breaking.

“I promise… I do.” Jaehyun reassured her. “Please. Let’s not get into it now.”

Mela sighed. “I’m tired. I think I am going to head to bed.” She started to walk away and Jaehyun followed, falling slightly behind so he could hug her from behind as they walked together.

Jaehyun laid his head down at the same time as Mela and brought the comforter over them both.

“I understand you might be a bit upset with me.” He said in a low voice. “But could you at least let me hold you?”

Mela’s heart dropped. She hadn’t realized the message she sent Jaehyun once she pushed herself off and threw a pillow at him. He’d seen her upset on multiple occasions but this time…it was different.

She wrapped her arms around his neck and shifted closer to him. “I’m upset but not that upset.”

Strong arms wrapped around Mela and all she could smell was a musky but spicy scent as she closed her eyes and inhaled.

When she opened her eyes again, it was daytime.

-

Jaehyun was nowhere to be found, so Mela sent him a text and then started her day.

“Girl, we have been at this villa for almost three weeks now. I love the time with him but I wish this was under different circumstances…” Mela said to her friend as she plucked an eyebrow hair.

“You mean like… your honeymoon or something like that?” Kay’s voice rang from the iphone.

Mela sighed and put the tweezers on the bathroom counter.

“Now….you know that’s not what I meant.” Mela replied.

“Oh yeah. Of course, he’d bring you to some island his parents bought for him for his 16th birthday. We know this.” Kay said nonchalantly.

“Very funny.” Mela rolled her eyes.

“Who said I was joking? He has an island, Melz. This is a fact.” Kay’s tone didn’t change but Mela grabbed the phone so she could make eye contact with her friend through the screen.

“What are you saying?” She finally said.

“I just looked it up. He has an island!” Kay burst into laughter. “Girl how are you dating one of the wealthiest men in the country and you haven’t googled him. People with money ain’t got privacy. Their business is all over the internet.”

“I have googled him. I never saw anything about an island…” Mela looked around in thought.

“I just sent you the link.” Kay said after a few seconds.

Mela opened it and her eyes widened. Sure enough, there was an article about Jaehyun being gifted a remote island for his 21st birthday.

“Wow.” Mela stared at her phone screen, stunned.

“And apparently there weren’t even any locals so this is the most ethical shit I’ve seen from a rich person.” Kay sounded indifferent but still amused.

“I can’t believe this.” Mela said under her breath.

“What was that?” Kay caught something.

“Nothing. Um, I actually wanted to talk to you about something.” Mela attempted to change the topic, when she heard the door open. “Ohhhh. It’s gonna have to wait. I gotta go.”

“Daddy’s home.” Kay said and winked.

“Goodbye!” Mela said and then ended the Facetime call.

A few seconds later, Jaehyun appeared at the bathroom door. He was dressed as if he went to work. Dark gray three piece suit, and his hair slicked back.

“You’re finally up. You looked so peaceful and pretty this morning. I couldn’t bring myself to wake you.” He stepped into the bathroom and gently grabbed Mela’s waist, pulling her into him. He kissed her softly and stepped back to look at her.

“Good afternoon.” Mela said, smiling at her lover as he began to unbutton his suit.

“Seems like you were having quite the conversation with Kay.” He started to undo his tie.

“I did. And we discovered something.” Mela said.

Jaehyun tilted his head and made a sound of confusion. He started walking to the bedroom and looked over his shoulder to make sure Mela was following. “And what exactly was that?”

“You have an island?” Mela leaned against the doorframe.

Jaehyun stopped undressing and stared at Mela.

“Yes?” He looked confused and Mela scoffed.

“How am I just now finding out?” She asked Jaehyun.

“Well…you never asked.” Jaehyun shrugged his shoulders and started unbuttoning his shirt. “Yes, because I ask everyone I know if they own an island.” Mela said as she followed Jaehyun back to the bathroom.

“Well I am not everyone. I am your boyfriend.” Jaehyun was now naked. Mela averted her gaze so Jaehyun wouldn’t catch her staring at her. But she was too late.

“Just come join me instead of acting like you aren’t horny.” He smirked and turned the shower on.

“I already showered.” Mela said and rolled her eyes, although her face betrayed her and she slightly smiled.

Jaehyun walked to her and started to slip her dress straps down her shoulders and kissed her deeply.

“Well, you should’ve waited for me. It’s a hot day and we need to save water.” He said once he broke the kiss. Mela caved and stepped out of her dress as she followed Jaehyun into the shower. He let Mela get underneath the water and gazed at her as the water trickled onto her back.

“What?” Mela looked at him with a puzzled look.

“You’re so pretty.” He said with a smile. “Turn around for me. I’ll be gentle.”

Mela turned over and Jaehyun placed a hand on her hip as he lined his cock along her wet hole.

“Baby..” Mela whimpered.

“I know I know.” Jaehyun mumbled into her ear as he slowly slid in. “Your pussy feels so tight around me when I do this but I know how much you like it when I stretch you out.” He caught Mela when her knees gave out and started to thrust into her.

Mela moaned softly and put her hands against the shower door. She felt herself clench around Jaehyun and a gentle squeeze around her breast indicated that Jaehyun felt it too.

“You love the way I fill you up, don’t you?” He slid his arm up and wrapped his hand around Mela’s throat. He thrusted deeper as Mela felt herself come undone. She started to tremble as she rode out the orgasm.

“Fuck, baby. We just started.” Jaehyun breathed out, pulling out as Mela continued to tremble. He held her close to keep her from falling and quietly cooed into her ear. “You make this sooo fun.”

“More. More.” Mela said, urging Jaehyun to continue.

He moaned and lined up the tip again and pushed himself into her. Mela’s head dropped as she bit her lip, holding back a moan. Jaehyun’s groans danced around Mela’s ears and he smiled when she clenched around him again. He rolled his hips and relished in the moment as he let his fingers glide alongside Mela’s smooth backside. Deep strokes caused her to slightly raise onto the tip of her toes as she then grabbed onto Jaehyun’s arm for support.

Jaehyun held Mela tighter and slid his free hand between her legs and began to rub her clit. “Oh fuck.” She squeezed her eyes shut.

“Just want to make you feel good, baby.” He mumbled and pressed his cheek onto Mela’s as he continued to stimulate her throbbing clit. “Let’s try for one more.”

‘Yes, yes.” Mela was able to get out, gaining a small chuckle from Jaehyun.

“That’s my girl.” He said before pulling out almost completely and then plunging even deeper into her.

“Fuck!” Mela shook.

Jaehyun immediately softened his thrusts. “Oh baby, I’m sorry. I forgot. Gentle.”

“No, fuck me harder.” Mela whimpered.

Jaehyun smiled and kissed Mela’s as he plunged into her deep and hard, his fingers still working on her clit. He closed his eyes as he felt his climax growing near. A deep groan rumbled in his chest as he focused on his rhythm. Mela squeezed his arm as she quietly whimpered. The feeling of being overstimulated becoming maddening.

“Baby, I’m soooo close.” Jaehyun grabbed a breast again and squeezed it gently as he moaned in her ear.

“Me tooo…Oh shit.” Mela trembled and clenched around Jaehyun as her orgasm rumbled throughout her entire body. This triggered Jaehyun’s climax and he groaned in Mela’s ear as he sprayed her walls with his warm seed. He nearly toppled over but he was able to quickly regain his composure and Mela giggled as he slowly pulled out.

“Right. About that shower.” Jaehyun finally said, still panting softly. Mela was already reaching for the soap, with the bath sponge already in hand.

-

The funeral was short but meaningful. Jaehyun stole glances at Mela throughout to make sure she was okay but said nothing. The ceremony was small and intimate. This was Mela’s first Korean ceremony of any sort. There was an older couple crying at the front. Mela immediately knew it was Joo’s parents. Jaehyun spoke with them for a few minutes after the ceremony. Both of them hugged Jaehyun and to Mela’s surprise, they hugged her too. Their hugs were full of warmth and assurance. It felt as though she was hugging her own parents. After speaking with them, it was time to speak with Jaehyun’s parents.

“Mela, honey. How are you doing?” Jaehyun’s mother was the first to speak. “He hasn’t been bothering you too much, has he?” She pinched Jaehyun’s cheek after wrapping Mela in a warm embrace.

“We should’ve checked in earlier but things have been extremely busy. Please come by for dinner this weekend. I insist.” Jaehyun’s father said with a squeeze of Jaehyun’s shoulder.

“Yes, Father. We will make sure to stop by.” Jaehyun said with a smile. His parents beamed at the couple and they spoke for a little longer before parting ways.

Jaehyun was silent on the way home but he seemed to be in a relaxed mood.

When they reached the villa, Mela was unusually tired.

“Baby, I think I am going to lay my head down for a bit.” She said as she entered the house and slipped out of her shoes.

“Are you feeling okay? It’s pretty early.” Jaehyun said, putting his hand to Mela’s forehead.

“Yeah. I am just tired, that’s all.” She smiled and reassured him.

“Hmmm. Well okay.” Jaehyun said as he softly caressed her cheek as she laid onto the bed and then he pulled the covers over her.

She watched Jaehyun shuffle around the room as he changed and rearranged things. Before Mela knew it, she was fast asleep.

Hours later, she woke up and looked at the time. It read 5:27am. Realization quickly hit that she had just slept for 11 hours. Jaehyun was still fast asleep on his side of the bed, one leg out of the covers, and arms folded under his head.

Mela gagged and ran to the bathroom in confusion. She reached the toilet right as she began to vomit. She blinked back tears as she continued to throw up. Jaehyun woke up and quickly ran to the bathroom and was at the door within seconds. He rubbed the sleep from his eyes and grabbed a pair of sweats and a t-shirt.

“Aw babe. I told you to go easy on the sushi.” He said, his voice still slightly groggy. “Let’s go to the hospital to get you some medicine and make sure you’re okay.” He finished dressing and walked over to Mela where she stayed kneeled in front of the toilet. She had stopped throwing up and grabbed a towel to wipe her mouth. Jaehyun softly rubbed Mela’s back and helped her up.

“Do you think you can do a ten minute drive or should we bring a plastic bag or bucket?” He said softly, while grabbing another small towel into his free hand.

Mela took a moment to respond but she finally said, “Bucket.”

Jaehyun nodded and started to guide her out of the room and to the front door. He stopped to grab a pail from underneath the kitchen sink and they both exited the villa.

On the way to the hospital, Mela threw up again. The duration wasn't as long as the first time but it was still enough to make Jaehyun worry.

The nurse at the front desk immediately stood straight as soon as she saw the couple enter.

“Oh my goodness, is everything ok?” She gasped once she saw Mela’s colorless face.

“My girlfriend isn’t feeling well. I just need to get her checked out and get any necessary medicine.” Jaehyun said, softly wrapping his arm around Mela’ shoulder.

“Yes, please follow me and I will alert a doctor.” They followed the nurse to a room and Mela immediately laid on the bed.

“I feel light-headed.” She told Jaehyun in English.

“Can we get some water, please?” Jaehyun translated for the nurse. She nodded and quickly scurried out of the room.

A few minutes passed before the doctor walked into the room with a clipboard and cup of water.

“Hello, I’m Dr. Moon. I’ll be taking care of you tonight.” He said in English, with a warm smile as he handed the cup to Mela. She took it and gave a hoarse “Thank you.”

“I don’t think she will be able to talk much.” Dr. Moon said, turning to Jaehyun. “Can you tell me what is wrong?

“Well, she slept for over 8 hours, which is really unlike her. Our day wasn’t busy. And then she woke up about thirty minutes ago and started throwing up. I thought it was the sushi, but now I am not so sure anymore.” Jaehyun told the doctor as Mela just watched, far too weak to contribute to the conversation.

“We will run some tests and see what we find.” The doctor nodded as he wrote notes on the paper on his clipboard.

-

About an hour later, Dr. Moon finally returned and he had a smile on his face.

“Oh how fun it is to be young and love.” He said, looking at Mela and Jaehyun.

They both looked at each other and then at the doctor.

“This isn’t a result of bad sushi.” Dr. Moon started. “ You, my dear, are about two months pregnant.”

Jaehyun’s mouth dropped and he brought a hand to cover it. Mela looked at Dr. Moon and then to Jaehyun.

“Pregnant?!?!” Mela and Jaehyun asked in unison.

Chapter 1

[gayboss-too-close-to-the-sun]

In defense of trashy ya dystopias

Okay, I’ll admit it: Hunger Games is an excellent book. It is powerful and well crafted, and deserves to be an eternal classic. I’m not sure any of the ya dystopias that followed it were quite so good, and I understand why they get mocked so often. Still, I think they deserve a better rep than they get.

Now, I understand that some ya dystopias are really, really bad. The only literary criticism that would call them good art would be a reader response based method that just says “well, some people like them so they must be good!” I don’t think that’s exactly how art works, but to an extent, that’s true. If a book inspired someone, encouraged them to read, and broadened their view of the world, who are we to say that it’s not worth reading? No matter how terrible a book is, it can at least make someone a bit more passionate about reading, and that’s value enough.*

First, I have to talk about Divergent. It makes me sad how many people hate that series. There are some valid criticisms, but most of it doesn’t make sense to me. People accuse Tris of being flat and basic, saying she’s an overpowered Mary Sue of a blank slate. That in particular confuses me. Tris isn’t dull and underdeveloped, she’s depressed. She’s reactive because she doesn’t care enough to be proactive. She’s numb, which comes across as her being unemotional. Now, we can debate whether that makes her a bad choice as a main character, but I won’t stand for her being painted as a bad character.

I was horribly depressed when I read Divergent. Watching Tris made all the difference in my life. I related to her when she threw a chair from the roof and watched it shatter on the concrete below, wishing she could follow it. I would have followed her to her death when she convinced herself that dying for her friends was noble sacrifice, not suicide, not the easy way out. I nearly cried when she realized at the last moment that she didn’t want to die, that she had to choose to keep going. I watched her build her life back up, even through the misery, pain and loss. I watched her find happiness, and I broke down when she gave it all up to protect someone else, someone who was trying to throw away his life out of guilt and grief. She sacrificed everything she had to give him a chance to fight through it and become someone better. She would have done the same for me. I needed to keep going, to honor that sacrifice and follow in her lead. Tris taught me to fight, and I am so grateful.

The Maze Runner was one of my favorite series. My longest completed story I’ve written was a trilogy of (unfortunately very straight) TMR fanfiction. I know it’s pretty garden variety dystopia, but it was very meaningful to me.

I think part of what made it special was having a male protagonist. Most ya dystopias are centered on teen girls, the intended audience, and while TMR could have used more diversity of gender in the cast, it was nice to see myself in the main character (although I like to believe I’m not that stupid). Thomas is also a very competent MC, which is always appreciated, and it feels earned more than Gary Stu-ed.

TMR has, despite not having any canonical evidence, a lot of gay ships in the fandom, probably because the boys all have a ton of chemistry and there are no girls (pretty much). I was deep in denial (see my straight fanfic), but TMR still gave my budding queerness a place to grow. While insisting that being gay was wrong and my homosexual crushes were Not Gay, I still managed to have very strong feelings on which Maze Runner ships are correct (Newt X Alby and Thomas X Minho, Newtmas shippers fight me). Being represented, even if I didn’t know it at the time, was so important to me.

Lastly, TMR taught me bravery. It taught me that even if things are just going to get worse, you have to try and make it out. I look at the world around me, and it’s not hard to imagine the Flare, or WICKED gaining power. Us kids have been handed the burden of fixing the world, and I need all the courage I can get. Like I say in my fanfic (the AWWWB series on Wattpad, first book called Good Grief), “Maybe the universe is just cruel. But… if we don’t know what’s outside of the Maze, then we’d better hold on to the fact that it’s just as likely to be a good place as a bad one.” We have to keep hoping that something better is coming eventually, even if it never does. We have to keep fighting.

I don’t have any others in mind right now, but I want to hear about other books (dystopian or not) that made more of a difference than they’re given credit for. Seriously, I want y’all to defend Twilight, to champion the Matched series. Tell me how they changed your life.

*note: books that spread harmful messages are different than poorly written books, but that’s a whole conversation by itself, so we’re going to be idealists in this post and pretend that’s not an element while acknowledging that in the real world it’s a true and harmful thing

[theblurbwitchproject]

Kiki's Delivery Service by Eiko Kadono

Published: June 1, 2021 Publisher: Sourcebooks Fire

The Author

Eiko Kadono is a Japanese author and has published nearly two hundred original works, most of which are books for children. In 1985, she published the children's novel Majo no Takkyūbin, which was later adapted into the Hayao Miyazaki animated film with the same title. Both the novel and the film are known by the English title Kiki's Delivery Service. The book was awarded the Hans Christian Andersen Award, among others, and she followed on this success with four sequels in the same series. She lives in the Kanagawa prefecture of Japan.

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The Story

Half-witch Kiki never runs from a challenge. So when her thirteenth birthday arrives, she's eager to follow a witch's tradition: choose a new town to call home for one year. Brimming with confidence, Kiki flies to the seaside village of Koriko and expects that her powers will easily bring happiness to the townspeople. But gaining the trust of the locals is trickier than she expected. With her faithful, wise-cracking black cat, Jiji, by her side, Kiki forges new friendships and builds her inner strength, ultimately realizing that magic can be found in even the most ordinary places.

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The Vibe: coming of age, whimsical, cosy, episodic adventures, wholesome, quirky, comfort read

The Style: japanese translation, children's literature, middle grade, chapter book, cute illustrations

Trigger Warnings: none

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The Review

Writing this review in 2024, I'd be surprised if you hadn't already seen, or at the very least heard of, Studio Ghibli's 1989 film Kiki's Delivery Service. As with all Ghibli movies, it is a lovingly animated piece with quirky characters and a wonderful soundtrack. Less people may be aware that, rather than being an original screenplay, the movie was based off the 1985 children’s novel of the same name.

According to Kadono, the story itself was inspired by a drawing her daughter drew of a witch flying through the sky with a radio, musical notes dancing around her. When creating Kiki, Kadono framed the character around her own daughter, who was also 12-years-old at the time. Drawing inspiration from her own daughter definitely brought life to Kiki, who experiences thoughts and feelings that all young girls go through in a considered and realistic way. I feel that this is the true heart of the story, and is why it touched so many people when it hit the big screen. The book itself is written for Middle Grade readers, and is a very simple story that adult readers could knock out in a day.

“I want everything to be brand-new - my clothes, my shoes, my broom, too. I want to be reborn. I’m sure Mom’ll say, ‘You’re from a long line of witches, so you need to value the old.” But I’m me. I’m a new witch.”

As with the film adaptation, the novel starts with Kiki preparing to leave home for her “Coming-of-Age” day, an event which kick-starts the year of mandatory independence that every 13 year-old witch is required to undertake. (It gives me a Pokémon vibe; how such young characters are encouraged to leave home to undertake some huge adventure on their own.) Kiki is confident in herself in the way only a child could be. She’s ready to start her life on her terms, but over the course of the story she begins to grow and experience cute developmental moments that show that she is moving on from childhood and becoming more knowledgeable about the world around her. These moments really show Kadono’s understanding of young girls like her daughter. Kiki begins to have doubts and questions about how things work as she settles in her new town, but still manages to make herself a little home above a shop owned by the lovely Osono, a friendly and heavily pregnant baker. If more people were like Osono, maybe kids could actually have more wholesome adventures out in the world??

How can I discuss Kiki without talking about her familiar, the black cat, Jiji? Within the lore of the book, a new-born witches’ mother searches for a black kitten born around the same time as her daughter, so that they can be raised together (super cute!). As they grow, they develop a special relationship and learn to communicate in their own language that no one else can understand. It turns out that Jiji is particularly sassy and can be a little cranky, but always comes through for Kiki when she needs help. While he can talk, Jiji is very much a cat, “Jiji shot her a reproachful glance and then made up his mind to ignore her altogether.” If you liked Jiji in the movie, you won’t be disappointed in his book counterpart; he’s just the best, and a good companion for Kiki as she sets off into the world on her Coming-of-Age day.

“Gradually, everyone’s waving hands below grew harder to see, and all the lights of the town twinkled like a starry night turned upside down. The full moon hung in the sky, watching over Kiki. Eventually even the lights of the town faded, and all she could see below were mountains shaped like the dark backs of animals.”

Kiki chooses to settle in a seaside town called Koriko, and most of the novel focuses around her living in Osono’s spare room and running “Kiki’s Delivery Service”, her own small business. She meets a whole bunch of unusual characters, some of whom would fit perfectly into a Roald Dahl story. Her slow ingratiation into the hearts of the town is well done, considering the episodic nature of each chapter and the simplistic narration. In the witchy tradition of Kadono’s universe, Kiki doesn’t accept payments for her deliveries; she takes small things in return like food or being taught a new skill. In this way, she grows as a person and becomes more self-sufficient, while still experiencing typical tween-girl issues like dealing with crushes, “Mysterious? Is that how I’m supposed to act? Maybe there’s something wrong with me?” The book walks the fine line between simple writing and slightly deeper exploration of Kiki’s character extremely well.

While the film is very faithful to the core characters, especially Kiki, Jiji and Osono, there are a number of plot differences in the book. The young painter who lives in the woods is there, although she doesn’t play as large of a role in the novel. Tombo is also a side character, and while he is still a friend of Kiki’s there are a few major differences in his storyline, although they still have a cute, innocent courtship. The novel gives more emphasis to the various jobs that Kiki completes in her career as a flying courier, and no major crisis of confidence occurs that causes Kiki to forget how to fly her broom or talk to Jiji. Like I said, this is a children’s book, and even small amounts of movie melancholy aren’t present; it’s sweet and heart-warming rather than inserting drama for the narrative’s sake.

“Kiki, make sure you come back, all right? We’re so happy to have a witch as our neighbor. Everyone says that if they go three days without seeing you flying through the sky, they feel like something is missing.”

If you’re a big fan of the Studio Ghibli film, this book is worth checking out, if only to spend a little bit more time seeing Jiji being the sass master that he is, but remember that it is very much a children’s book and therefore a super simple read. I would definitely recommend it for younger readers, particularly if they enjoy stories like The Worst Witch by Jill Murphy. Kiki’s Delivery Service is very cosy and wholesome; if you feel like reading the book equivalent of a hot chocolate on a cold day, it’s one for you.

Rating: 🌕🌕🌕🌑🌑

[Goodreads]

[atopvisenyashill]

I love your post about Targ women choosing to have children on their own terms but I think F&B more so suggests that Aegon IV assaulted Elaena and that’s why she rushed into a marriage and possibly killed her husband to pass off Viserys as his (I just realized as I’m typing this that it’s an old post but I already typed this so 💀💀)

oh tbc im well aware the consent wrt elaena and viserys plumm is dubious at BEST, i just kinda glossed over it for the sake of the joke that targ women are constantly having bastards and trying to pass their bastards off as legitimate lol.

personally, my theory is that given that ossifer plumm is considered a wealthy man, that aegon had elaena marry ossifer to attempt to get his hands on that fortune (similar to robert marrying cersei so that jon arryn & the iron throne can gain access to the lannister gold) and either offed ossifer himself as sort of an ultimate cuckold fantasy (steal your wife, your title, and pass my baby as yours) or ossifer genuinely did just kick the bucket, so aegon forced himself (whether thru literal force or coercion) onto elaena so he could still have access to the plumm fortune.

my point about elaena in that post is more about how, due to elaena’s intelligence, ability to politic, and generally amazing moral compass considering the situation she grew up in, she managed to give both her bastards by alyn velaryon and her “bastard” viserys plumm a great life by doing her second husband’s whole ass job, gaining her own allies at court as well as daeron’s trust, and burying a lot of the scandal of her younger years by being amazing as she navigated adulthood. like, aegon iv doesn't even have a dragon he can feed his detractors to, he's just an asshole so the plumms and the people of the parchments should have put up some sort of fuss but they don't and I think that's at least in part due to elaena being well liked and well respected (and also, very likely people just felt bad for her as a victim of aegon's, which ALSO speaks to how well liked elaena is because look at the way some of the other mistresses are talked about when they're objectively victims!). and unlike most other targ women, she not only marries for love but she spends several years very happy in that marriage and it doesn't even blow up in her face!

what's fascinating in general about elaena is that she lives through a lot of the violent, vile things that a lot of targ women are forced to live through, from being creeped on by valyrian men who feel like they are Owed sexual control of female relatives, to having a bastard, to being married off as a political tool, to extreme isolation, and elaena manages to take all of that adversity and build a mostly happy life for herself, and her children and she does it without attempting to set half the continent on fire. that is amazing in this series and its part of why i'm so excited for f&b part 2 (bc she hasn't been born yet in f&b part 1, all of our info on her comes either from TWOIAF or cersei & tyrion being huge fucking nerds about history).

[livlepretre]

yYou updated at the perfect time for me. I’m on the last day of my vacation, so I’m tanning on the mediterranean beach, sipping sangria and devouring every single word of this chapter - what a sweet way end to my holiday!

The last update gave me such a sad feeling for elena, even though you said she is actually happy. Now that she's decided to ignore Stefan and not allow him to impact her, to take charge of her relationship with Bex and get a sense of control over their relationship (I LOVE that Rebekah lets her, I think she can tell that she needs it), and, of course, to form a new bond with Kol, I can truly feel her happiness. My jaw was on the floor when she confided in Kol about her feelings about the daggering. She hadn't even discussed it with Rebecca to this degree, so I can only imagine how relieved she must feel now that she's spoken up and that Kol has genuinely understood and offered unspoken support.

Of couse my favorite thing about this chapter is Klaus’s misery which is bringing him closer and closer to his breaking point. Him yearning for her, regretting his past decisions and being in pain always puts a smile on my face. My favorite scene by far was him having to sit next to her while she was genuinely enjoying her time and he was just NOT.

I havent seen this mentioned in any comment: I feel like Stefan is actually going off the rails, like what the actual fuck???? was it him alone that killed that entire club?

My theory is that Kol is there to find a way to kill Klaus, as that was his agenda 100 years ago which got him daggered (what else would he be doing in nola anyways??). Rebekah is helping him because she knows she can’t actually be free from Klaus and can’t freely pursue her relationship with Elena (she wants to turn her but klaus is so against it and I feel like Rebekah secretly chooses Elena over Klaus. She chose Stefan over Klaus back in the days in Chicago. OMG maybe that’s what she means by the nostalgia of a farewell???)

Fuck this was such a great chapter I will definitely write more about it once i sober up and reread it lol

Also I wanted to ask you, do you prefer getting comments/asks here on tumblr or on ao3? I will adapt to your preference for future chapters😁

PS im getting progressively drunker as I’m writing this so it might not even make sense fuck me I hope you got the gist of what im rambling about💕😘

ugh, tanning on the Mediterranean beach, YOU ARE TRULY LIVING

going to admit that I was shrieking my way through this comment, thank you so much for sharing your thoughts on this chapter with me 💖

I think Elena needed to just draw some boundaries-- she's done it with Stefan, she's done it with Rebekah, and she's even managed it with Klaus (which: that is HARD work)

I think she was probably able to talk to Kol a little better because they're sort of intimate strangers-- they have the same people in common, she has read and admired his work-- but she doesn't really know him, and so there's no baggage there-- no fear of rejection, really, or of being honest-- because really, what are the stakes? and he catches her at just the right moment, in just the right mood, to want to share that with him

SUCH a great point though, that these are feelings that she has kept so closely locked up inside of herself that she doesn't share them with anyone-- and maybe she managed to share them better with Kol BECAUSE he would have used the gold dagger himself-- because he had that same capability to slay Klaus, someone he loves (even if it's very complicated)

I realized while editing this chapter that it takes forever for Klaus to even have a speaking line, but BOY does that silent smothering agony during the play speak volumes about his state

oh, our boy Stefan is going as far off the rails as it is possible to go

I think actually Elena was the last thing keeping him going and now that she's decided she's done, he's gone, he's speeding downhill on fire and just gathering speed, and there is no one at all who is going to stop his fall. it's actually terrible timing for him that Kol is here now, because Kol is just going to find things to add fuel to the fire and enjoy warming his hands by it-- being an Original, I think Kol is a bit more impervious to the downsides of being a ripper (ummm insanity? but I guess all of the Originals suffer from this anyway?)

As for the club, Rebekah and Klaus ended up killing some folks, but only Stefan was feasting; I think Rebekah and Klaus were doing damage control

Fascinated by your theory as to what Kol is doing here, and just, everything you said. I will neither confirm nor deny-- but leave it to the upcoming chapters to reveal all! Absolutely SCREAMING though that you are still percolating over the nostalgia of a farewell line!

and I am thrilled to get any comments at all, ao3 vs tumblr is really up to you!

xoxo thank you so much for this comment!! hope the remainder of your vacation was GREAT!

[agent-oo-z]

We did it gang! Tavi officially beat the game! I think I may try to re do the final fight tho, it was all kinds of fucky and weird plus the patch dropped like. Just after I finished her playthrough lol. Tavi managed to fully dominate the brain(with the use of all her inspiration of course) and it felt so fuckin good. Anyways expect some cute epilogue screenshots of my beloved robin-hood girl boss murder queen ranger babe.

Some bonus little head canons below the cut 🖤

Karlach’s engine gives out before Astarion starts to burn. I refuse to believe Tavi doesn’t run after her beloved and set up an emergency shade shelter for him. She puts her ranger skills to use! She has her bears guard the entrance and stays inside with Astarion. Checks to see if the burns need treatment, and if they don’t just focused on trying to keep him from panicking. She blames herself because she should have prepared for this before hand.

Although she spends the night with Astarion, she gives him a moment alone to process his own feelings and takes the time to speak with Halsin. She’s mostly planning on telling Halsin that she still deeply loves him but she needs to stay with Astarion and try to find a cure/way for him to walk in the sun for now. Then Halsin is all like “I have so many orphaned kids to take care of and I need to go basically build a new community at moonrise” so it just kinda. Works out? Eventually she and Halsin head back to her room and explain everything to Astarion and are like “we’re not ending anything but we are acknowledging that things are gonna be weird and we’re going to be separate physically”

Atavia sleeps basically 24 hours straight after everything. I’m a firm believer in the “elves don’t need to sleep but they can if they’re super fucking exhausted or if they choose to” so I imagine she just. Conks out. Astarion is kinda stressed at first and panics and wakes her up. Once he realizes she’s just very tired he chills out. They end up properly “sleeping together” for the first time since they met. Astarion makes so many jokes about it.

Tavi talks to Gale about her and Astarion maybe staying with him in Waterdeep until they can get a lead on something to help Astarion and offers to help him search for the crown. Gale is like “of course you can stay, but I must find the crown on my own” and has Tara welcome them in and help them get settled. When Gale finds the crown and is freed of the orb he surprises the two by arriving and preparing a massive feast. Tavi is so happy for him she starts crying and kisses him and then the whole Tav-cule officially begins.

Atavia feels the need to fix all the problems/save all her fiends and so takes all the various infernal metals they collected(stole) on their journey to Damon so he can study them and work towards a solution. She eventually gets a way to get in contact with Wyll and Karlach so they know what progress is being made outside of the hells

[lovingherrscher]

Rebellion -  叛逆の物語

Warning: Contains spoilers of Madoka Magica the Movie: Rebellion, so read at your own risk!

Note: I was really lost that whether I should post this here or not, since this is a very, very old work of mine. I wrote this about 3 years ago I think? Well I did it anyway, please enjoy this! What was I thinking when I wrote this you may ask? I always wanted to make a scenario where I can take Dazai out and see my all-time favorite series, up till now it’s still got some pretty heavy impact on me, so I whipped this up randomly, I couldn’t recall how did I manage to go this far. Again, I’m sorry if there’s any grammar mistakes, or in some case did I make Dazai seems OOC. 

————————————

It's been a while since you two have a movie night, and since both of you got the day off tomorrow, Dazai decided that tonight will be movie night. He texted you to choose the movie on the way home and he'll prepare the popcorn and stuffs. It didn't take too long for you to answer, instead of popcorn, you told him to prepare some tissues and hot chocolate with marshmallows. Dazai was surprised, usually you'd be the one who ask for popcorn, but maybe you just want some change once in a while.

When you're back, everything is already set up. Dazai even place a few extra pillows around the sofa too, so you won't be sore even if you fell asleep. It's about 7pm, the perfect time to start. Yes, you two skipped dinner for movie night. You inserted the disk then went back to the sofa with Dazai.

Puella Magi Madoka Magica

"A magical girl anime? Now that's rare. Why did you choose this, (y/n)?"

"I just wanted to share some new things with you, Dazai. Is there anything wrong?"

"Nothing, let us get back to the movie, shall we?"

The first, then the second episode passed, everything seems normal, at least it was until the third episode. That part when Mami confessed that she wasn't all reliable and that she was only forcing herself to man up made you cry, even though it's the third or fourth time you seen it.

"I don't deserve anyone's admiration."

"I'm just forcing myself to man up."

Eventually, you two reached the eighth episode, where Sayaka lost herself and let the despair take her, so that she became a Witch. It took more than just a box of tissues and hot chocolate for you to calm.

"When wishing for someone's happiness, someone must be cursed in order to keep the balance."

"The balance between hope and despair remains at zero."

"That's how us Magical Girls work."

"I'm...such an idiot."

No matter how many times you seen this scene, it always manage to strike you right in the heart. You could say that you can understand the Holy Quintet's pain. To Mami, it was loneliness, to Sayaka, it was the feeling when you realized you've done everything for the man you love, but ended up didn't have the courage to tell him about how you feel, to Kyoko, it was the guilt when you did something you thought it'd be good but then fucked up. To Madoka, it was a bit lack of self-confident and sacrifice because of the wants to help everyone ends their suffering. Last, but not least, to Homura, it was the burning desire to protect the one you love, using every methods you have to, even if it was the cruelest thing you ever did.

Dazai stays silent as you two reached the next episode, when Kyoko took Madoka to fought against Oktavia, hoping they could get Sayaka back. There was that line Kyoko said, in the Witch's barrier that made Dazai remember his old days back in the Dark Era, when he was still a mafia executive.

"Only people who have been forced into a corner would do this kind of job that disregards their lives."

He, too, wasn't given a choice. Joining the Mafia was his only choice then. Mori took him under his wings and trained him to be an exact copy of him, so Dazai could one day took the position of being the Mafia Boss. He despise both that man, and himself, who would have become an another him if it wasn't for his friend's death.

Those who've been forced into a corner, huh? It's true that there are many people joined the Mafia almost being forced. For example, himself, Kyouka, Chuuya, and the Akutagawa siblings too. They do the kind of job that disregards their lives, knowing they could die any moment if their guard was left down. Well, again, if it wasn't for Odasaku's death, he wouldn't have left the Mafia and would probably be the Boss now.

"Hey Dazai? Are you alright? You have been staring into space for twenty minutes already.."

The sound of (y/n) calling for him pulled him back to the reality, where the movie was stopped and she was looking at him worried. Dazai just pat her head, saying that he's fine and reach for the remote to continue. It was getting late, but neither of you want to stop, so you wrapped the blanket around the both of you and leaned your head on his shoulder as you two continue watching Madoka.

"As long as you protect the one you want, to protect them to the very end is enough."

Why? They're just little girls, right? If that's the case why did they understand life that much as if they've been living for a really long time? Dazai didn't want to admit it, but he feels as if he is going to cry. Their words lingered in his head, reminding him of his past, those were the days that he wanted to forget for good. After Oda died, he went to Lupin almost everyday like a basis, drink until he's drop and then went back to his empty apartment, passed out on his bed before waking up middle of the night because of nightmares.

The tenth episode, which explain pretty much everything about Homura strikes both of them. That part when Homura fell into despair and began to imagine when she and Madoka became Witches, just right after when they battled Walpurgis Night.

"Hey.. How about the two of us become monsters like that, and ruin the entire world."

"Taking bad things, sad things, and wiping all of it clean."

"Destroy. Destroy. Destroy without end. Don't you think that's good too?"

She was desperate to the point that she had thought about becoming a Witch wouldn't be that bad. She can keep on destroying things, no matter it's good things, bad things, sad things, or happy things. Why did it have to become like this? They were so young and pure and filled with hope and dreams.. Just like him. At least before he tried committing suicide.

"I promise!"

"I'll definitely save you!"

"No matter how many times I go back! I'll always protect you!"

It risen a thought in his head, he wondered that if he was gifted with time-manipulation power, would he choosen the path like Homura did to save Odasaku? No matter how many times he have to go back, and probably see him die. Would he still be able to feel anything? Or would he became numb and eventually give in to the despair? No, the real question is, will he be strong enough to choose that path. Homura may looks fragile and weak, even a bit timid, but she was the strongest one. Normal people wouldn't be themselves after seeing their important person dies right in front of their eyes without being able to do anything once, left alone times after times.

"I don't want to be a Witch."

"Although I've seen terrible and bad things, there are still many things I want to protect in this world."

Strangely, this reminds him of his deceased friend. He was always the one looking on the bright side of the problem. Why did he have to die? He was in the Mafia, yet he refused to kill anyone. But everything changes when Mimic came. Because of them, Mori thought of a way to use him like a pawn to get the license, and ended up dragging the innocents in. He couldn't forget how he looks when the owner of the diner dies along with his adopted children. If it wasn't for him that founded out about Ango, then things probably wouldn't go this way, and Oda would still be alive by now.

"Madoka. If someone came to tempt you with miracles, never be manipulated by them!"

"There's no one to rely on anymore."

"There's no need for anyone to understand."

This.. Feels so familiar. He didn't need anyone to understand the circumstances he was going through. He can't rely on anyone as well. How can he possibly tell them? Would they understand anyway? So there's no need to do such a thing. It'll only be a waste of time.

"Return."

"No matter how many times, I will always choose to return. Repeating the same period of time over and over again, searching for the only exit. For you.. A path out of the destiny of despair."

Will there be a timeline, or a world out there where Oda is still alive, and was able to achieved his dream to become a writer and have his novel published? All of the sudden, he wanted to become a little girl and find that Incubator creature, so he can form a contract with him just to see his friend once again. To see him living the life he had always been wanting. A Mafia non-related life, staying in a house with his room that can see the sea clearly, even in days with bad weathers, writing novels, maybe having one or a few cats. But..

"Why does she fight and risk everything?"

"Because she's still pursuing hope."

"No matter how many times, she refuse to quit; therefore repeating this meaningless and endless cycle."

"To her, stopping is equivalent to giving up."

"As long as she believes there's still hope, she can't be saved?"

After the series ended, you two had a short break before continue with the third movie, Rebellion. You simply said that it was the best thing that ever happened in this entire series to Homura. Was that she finally reached Madoka and get to see her again? He can't know.

At the beginning, it makes Dazai wondered was this an alternative universe where they can all live happily. But things aren't that simple, when Homura's journey to find the truth begun. When she regained her memories about Witches, their barriers and her previous battle against them, even about Madoka becoming a God to save every magical girls and she, along with Tatsuya, are the only ones whose memories of Madoka remained.

Her battle with Mami reminds him of when Oda and Gide fought. No magic, no abilities, just pure skills and weapon. But in the end, Mami still have the upper hand. The way she used her ribbons to tie Homura reminds him of the third episode in the series, when she was about to go against Charlotte, Homura did offer to help her, since Mami was lack the experiences and aren't strong enough to deal with such a strong Witch. She ended up losing her head.

"Would you really be okay destroying this Mitakihara City? You should think hard on that before you decide. So you won't have any regrets."

That was what Sayaka asked her. Since she had became a Witch, she would know how it feels like when the despair swallow you whole, filled your veins and become the blood that flows inside your body. Regrets. Pain. Desperate. It feels like your body became the vessel for every single negative emotions out there.

"It really hurts me to see you suffering so much and being unable to do anything about it."

"You see, I had a really scary dream."

"In it, you had gone to a place so far away that I had no chance of seeing you again. And everyone else in the world forgot all about you. Only I could remember you in the whole wide world!"

"I was so lonely and sad. But no one could understand how I felt. Surrounded by that, I started thinking my memories of you were things I'd made up. And I began doubting myself."

It reminds him of when Oda died, almost no one remember or know who he is. To the outsiders, he's just an unknown man. To the members of the Mafia, he's just a low-level member that they don't need to care about. But to him, and maybe Ango too, he was a friend. An important friend who enlightened their paths and their souls. He was luckier, that he didn't doubt himself, because there was something that proves Oda really exist is always with him. The photo they took together for the last time in Lupin, just a day before the storm.

"But you see, I became a magical girl solely to save Madoka. And that holds truth until now."

"So this is a Witch. My emotions have all come back to haunt me."

"I can't remember anything but glimmers of light and regret."

"Ah.. So this is my despair."

He cried. Dazai cried for the first time watching it. He didn't notice tears were rolling down his cheeks until you pulled him in your arms, holding him tight, pecking his forehead and caress his cheeks in the gentlest way possible. You said that it's okay to cry and let it out like this. You wanted to show him this because Homura reminds you of him in many ways. He needn't to ask for the reason, since he had witnessed it already.

"Despite her appearance, she's the most hurt."

You told Dazai that, the first time you saw him, you didn't think he'd be broken this badly. The truth that everyone thinks that way. He seems to be a happy-go-lucky guy and knows how to irritated serious people, lazy and likes to play around. But inside, he suffered from many things. Ghosts of the past that reminds him of the days in the Mafia, his shadow which guilt-trip him over every single small things happened, his anxiety that caused him to fear for failure therefore he has to think of every single possible that can or may happen to deal with them. Yet people think he is the genius, back when he was in the Mafia, he was called "The Demon Prodigy" because all of his plans worked. But they know nothing about him and what he is suffering from.

"I have to die in this world."

Yes. He has to die. That's what he has been thinking ever since a long, long time before. He had countless suicide attempts, yet none of them succeed. They all failed. Why is that he can't die? Why is that the world is trying to prevent him from dying to atone for his sins?

"I had a sickening dream. A dream where you were dead."

"Because I actually do have one regret. The fact that I left you behind."

He cried again, did Odasaku has any regrets when he died? If he had, then what would it be? You turned to him, whispering that he wouldn't want you to die and his regrets probably was that he left him behind all alone back then.

"That's no good, Homura."

"I told you that you shouldn't go off by yourself."

"No matter what happens, you'll always be you, Homura. And I would never abandon you. So don't give up."

"I'm sorry.. I'm so spineless.. I wanted to see you one more time.. And if I had to go so far as to betray that wish.."

"That's right, I knew I could shoulder any sin. No matter what I became, I knew I'd be fine with it. As long as I could have you by my side."

This.. He only wanted to see his friend again.. But it's impossible. He almost screamed due to his emotional burst out.

"Why did such a good person have to die? Why didn't I the one who dies instead?"

You simply pat his head, pulling him closer and embraced him tightly.

"It's alright. I'll always be here for you. No matter what happens, you'll always be you, and I would never abandon you or stop loving you. I love you, Dazai. So please, don't let the ghosts from the past get to you.. No. I won't let them get to you. I swear that I, (y/n) will bring you happiness with my own hands! Even if I have to turn myself into a mere concept, I will still take all those despair from you, I will be your only God that brings happiness."

He was stunned. There hasn't been a single person who has said something like that to him. He was touched. Even though you two have been dating for quite a while already but he had never heard such a bold decision from you. Immediately, Dazai pulled you into a tight hug, his face buried in your neck.

"Thank you, (y/n).. I couldn't imagine how I'd become or what I'd become if you didn't come into my life. You don't have to go that far just to make me happy, all you have to do is stay by my side, that's more than enough already."

You kissed him before getting back on the ending of Rebellion. You knew what was coming, and you're sure Dazai would be surprise by it.

"It was not even curse that soiled my Soul Gem."

"It's the pinnacle of all human emotions. More passionate than hope, far deeper than despair. It's love."

"She was as sacred as a god, and I couldn't help but pull her from heaven and undermine her."

"A being that perform such threat could only be called a demon, I suppose?"

He smirked, paused the movie before turned to you, who was dumbfounded of what just happened.

"(Y/n), did you just say that you'll be my God?"

"Yes..? What's wrong with that, Dazai?"

"Oh, there is. Because I'm a demon that couldn't help but pull you down from heaven and make you mine, forever."

————————————

To be continued...?

[nirikeehan]

>:3 Hi Niri >:3 I has a prompt for you >:3 Thalia and Alora "Characters struggling to talk because they’re about to cry." Happy Firday >:3

HI ED thank you!! Here are two horse girls trying to contend with the disaster of Thalia's love life. I hope I did Alora justice!

For @dadrunkwriting

WC: 913

---

“What? What is it?” Alora implored. 

Thalia wiped at her eyes. “I— I— he—” She couldn’t get the words out. Every breath felt like a choking gasp that clawed at her throat. 

“Deep breaths, all right?” Alora reached forward and grasped Thalia by the shoulders. “In and out. Slowly. Count to three. In, two, three… that’s right. Out, two, three…”

Slowly, Thalia managed to match her breathing to Alora’s gentle guidance. She tried to focus on her friend: the long, straw-colored braid that fell loose over her shoulder, the delicate calligraphy that tattooed her face, called vallaslin by the Dalish. Thalia had wondered what it was like to choose to have oneself marked instead of being forced to endure such things, like she had at the Circle. 

“I’m sorry,” Thalia mumbled, sinking low on the divan they shared in her Skyhold quarters. “I just… don’t understand what happened.” 

“Start at the beginning, maybe?” 

“Ugh.” How could she even pinpoint the beginning? Was it when she first realized the Warden was flirting with her, by the stables at Haven? Or must she admit it went back farther still, when she sought him out in the Hinterlands and saw the way he handled the conscripted farmers, firm but fair? 

Neither, she decided. “So, he invited me to the Storm Coast.” 

Alora’s eyebrows furrowed. “Oh?”

“Alone,” Thalia added. 

“Oh.” The small crease between Alora’s brows deepened.

Thalia’s voice dropped to nearly a whisper. “To an abandoned Warden outpost.”

“Oh. Ohhhh.” Alora placed a gentle hand over Thalia’s. “Did you… you know—?”

“No!” Thalia cried. “Well, I mean, I thought— perhaps— those were his intentions…” She felt her face grow hot. 

“Are you saying they weren’t?” Alora asked, confused. 

Relief washed over Thalia. “All right, so it isn’t just me.” 

A coy grin slipped onto Alora’s face. “I mean. I’m not exactly an expert, but if a dashing older man wants to whisk you away to a secluded, clandestine location…”

“Exactly! Exactly.” Thalia huffed. “But no, that’s not happened at all. We didn’t even make it to the outpost. We just… he found the site where he and his Warden colleagues were ambushed by darkspawn… their bones were still there, Alora. And he just sort of… got sad. In the rain.” 

Alora’s eyes widened in horror. “That… doesn’t make any sense!” 

“Nor did it make any to me!” Thalia sat up, growing more animated from the agitating memories. “And then… last night… he just appeared. Right over there.” 

She pointed to the balcony door, and Alora gasped, hands clutching her mouth. “He didn’t!”

“He did,” Thalia insisted, forcing herself to settle down again on the divan. “It was the most forward thing a man has ever done to me.”

Alora leaned back against the armrest, her eyes as wide as an owl’s as the firelight played on her face. “And?”

Thalia pressed her lips together, averting her face. “He kissed me.” 

“And?” 

Thalia sighed, and again the tears threatened to fall. She thought of the way Blackwall had grabbed her, the ferocity behind the embrace and the mouth pressed against hers. “He… he kept saying I had to end things between us. That it wasn’t right, but he wasn’t strong enough to — to resist me. So I had to be the one to do it.” The bitterness crept into her tone. Her frustration she’d felt for months now bubbled to the surface. Blackwall and his big grandiose statements. Blackwall and his insistence that somehow his love for a lady like her could only be poison. 

Alora’s face fell. “Oh, Thalia. You didn’t.” 

“What else was I supposed to do?”  she demanded. 

“Not what he says! That’s just a ploy, isn’t it? What he really wanted you to do was say—” She affected a higher-pitched version of Thalia’s Ostwick accent. “‘Oh, Warden Blackwall, I don’t care about all that. We belong together, no matter what. I’ll follow you to the very depths of the Deep Roads, if it meant we could spend one more second in each other’s loving embrace.’”

Thalia’s lip curled in disgust. “Is that really what I sound like?”

“Well. I embellished a little for dramatic effect.” Alora shrugged. “But I think I’m right.” 

Thalia scowled; she knew it was true. Neither of them were all that worldly when it came to love, but even Thalia could sense that Blackwall’s deep brooding possessed some element of craving validation. It angered her so much, however, that he couldn’t simply make his intentions plain. She crossed her arms over her chest, stewing. 

“Sooo,” Alora said into the silence, “I’m guessing he got cross and left?” 

Thalia blew out an impatient breath that lifted the wisps of hair around her face. “You guess correctly.” 

Alora swallowed hard. Thalia watched her friend search for words, only to settle on, “Yikes.” 

“I know. I know.” Thalia scrubbed her hands down her face. “What do I do?” 

Alora squinted. “Try to talk to him?” 

“He’s been avoiding me all day.” 

“I know!” Alora pulled in a leg to hug against her chest. “We lock all the barn doors so he can’t escape, and then you climb in that opening that’s in the loft…”

Thalia stifled a laugh. “And then what?” 

Alora gave a helpless shrug. “Love conquers all?” 

“If only.” Thalia sighed.

“Er. Well.” Alora chewed her lip. “If you really think it’s hopeless… there’s always the Commander, yeah?”

Thalia grabbed a throw pillow and smacked her with it. “Oh, stop!” 

[dreamingsushi]

Till the End of the Moon - Episode 26

I’m back from vacation, so now is a good time to get going with this series. I’m kind of anxious, because it started off so well and the last few episodes, we lost a little bit of that character consistency that made it so good to me in the beginning and it has been very frustrating. Hopefully it’s going to keep steering in the right direction and I won’t be too disappointed by the following 15 episodes.

She starts it up quite strongly. She asks Tantai Jin to marry her and make her his empress. Ye Qingyu disagrees with Tantai Jin agreeing to it. He says she needs to go back home and face what she has done, but Tantai Jin says that he doesn’t want to trouble her before the wedding and that she wants to cut ties with the Ye family, so her name should be erased from the family records. Tantai Jin wants to proceed with the wedding as soon as possible and ends up choosing an inauspicious day for it. Ye Xiwu acts cruelly towards her brothers. Ye Qingyu says she’s changed. And on to the wedding.

Tantai Jin’s coat looks like it’s covered with grass. I think... this is going to be the first costume design that I highly disagree on. The wedding starts. When he reaches out his hand for hers, she doesn’t take it. This sounds bad. We also discover that she got all of the nails when she asked him to marry her (but they’re already married, so I don’t get it). Anyways. It starts snowing. He offers his hand again and this time she takes it. Overall, she’s really off, but I guess he’s too drown in happiness to actually notice that she behaves extremely WEIRD!

While waiting for the husband to come to the bed chamber, she gives herself a pep talk that she did all of this for this day. She notices that Tantai Jin must be very happy. She’s super awkward, I wonder how he does not see anything of it. Or I hope he’s pretending? So she was missing one nail. When she kisses him, it created the ninth one and her eye turns purple. I forget about the jade she took for him. She admits that her goal was to kill him and that’s why she came back. After stabbing him with the first three nails. He says he still loves her, but she tells him she never loved him. Why? What’s the help to your mission in saying that? Especially when like 5 episodes ago before you left to free Xiao Lin you were thinking you could spend your life with him as your lover and prevent him from becoming a demon. But when she’s about to send the last of the three nails, the dragon scale protects him. The nails desintegrate. Nothing protects the evil bone/essence anymore. He asks her why she lied to him, but they both fall down together.

Ye Qingyu finally realized that Ye Xiwu cut ties with her family because she knew all along what she was going to do. He tries to convince his dad to leave, but he won’t abandon his daughter.

Tantai Jin has three years left to live. They can’t remove the six nails from his chest. Nian Baiyu is very sad. He wants Tantai Jin to rest, but the king wants to get changed and go see Ye Xiwu. And he’s wearing his wedding clothes, with the grass. Why? So blabla, you betrayed me all the time, I was still nice to you, loved you blabla. I failed, there’s no point to live, kill me. No, let’s suffer together, since you didn’t want my love, here’s a serving of my hatred. And that’s how she made him become a demon god. She shouldn’t have meddled to begin with. But at some point it’s interesting to see that sometimes, the supposedly “good ones” are actually awful people too.

Ye Qingyu gets the permission to go see Ye Xiwu. However, Ye Bingchang is there already. She reveals how she poisoned the porridge. Ye Xiwu blames her for Xiao Lin’s death. Then Ye Bingchang tries to strangle her. Meanwhile... She thinks of the past. Qingyu and Pianran comes just in time. Pianran tosses away Ye Bingchang while Qingyu tends to Xiwu.

And that’s it. I don’t see how they’re going to manage from now on. I don’t see anything. My mind is totally blank. I’m confused. Did she resent him for the death of her granny and Xiao Lin and that’s why she decided to act finally and stopped hesitating? I don’t know.