#and as for his success- well- joint bank account baby

[alarrylarrie]

I think that article is actually incredibly interesting- if you only read Louis’ quotes. I’d throw the bit about Simon out in the trash, but that’s clearly a non-disparage clause ad infinitum talking, not Louis himself.

He couches what he says about Harry- in my opinion, tries to defend him while treading VERY lightly, because he has to, of course. He says, about his Grammy’s speech: “we all came from humble beginnings” basically explaining what Harry meant. Then, in talking about Harry’s fame- he says “we all knew Harry fit that mold” which doesn’t cast any dispersions on Harry, it’s actually a lot closer to ‘Harry was born to do this and was set up from practically day one to do this’ - and that’s not untrue, is it?

It’s the author who puts all the malice into that article. Louis’ quotes, themselves, seem like everything I’d expect him to be able to, (and willing) to say.

[causeiwanttoandican]

Robert Lacey excerpt

I fully expect them to say William was the one commenting about the baby’s skin color after this. Battle stations! Book excerpt

The Times

Prince William ‘split his household from Prince Harry after Meghan bullying claims’

June 07 2021, 7.00am BST

‘So, are you saying,” asked Oprah Winfrey, talking to Meghan and Harry in their famous interview of March 2021, “that there were hints of jealousy?”

She was inquiring about the Sussexes’s wildly successful tour of Australia and the South Pacific of late October 2018, and the couple shifted uncomfortably in their plush wicker chairs.

“Look,” replied Harry, “I just wish that we would all learn from the past.”

By bringing up “the past”, the prince was venturing into an area that was almost taboo. He was making a sensational comparison between his mother and his wife. Harry was suggesting that Meghan had demonstrated in Australia the same massive star quality as Diana and was now having to face the family envy that went along with that.

“It really changed,” he said, “after the Australia tour, after our South Pacific tour . . . it was . . . the first time that the family got to see how incredible she is at the job. And that brought back memories.”

Memories of what? Again Harry shied away from putting words to the almost unmentionable. But Oprah had prepared and polished this moment, like so many others in the interview, and she had a reference ready to prompt her prince’s revelation. The latest, fourth season of TV’s The Crown had depicted Charles and Diana’s 1983 tour of Australia, showing how Diana had been “bedazzling” in her ability “to connect with people”. Episode six had depicted how the crowds would groan when they realised that Charles, not Diana, was walking down their side of the street — hence the beginnings of the “jealousy” on the family’s part.

“So is that what you’re talking about?” asked Oprah. “It brought back memories of that?”

“Yeah,” Harry finally replied in a fashion that was both dismal and unmistakably aggressive.

What on earth had happened, viewers had to wonder, to the old and once-familiar happy side of Prince Harry?

When trying to define the moment that marked the decisive rift with his brother William — the break-up and actual separation of the joint household they had established together in 2009 — Harry would fix upon his triumphant return with Meghan from their Australian tour at the end of October 2018. But if asked the same question, William would have fixed on a more specific event: the explosive argument he had had with his brother earlier that month.

Both brothers agreed how bitterly they had clashed back in the early days over William’s attempt to slow Harry’s courtship of Meghan — “Don’t feel like you need to rush this . . . ” But both of them had subsequently moved on. Harry’s transparent contentment with Meghan had relaxed the tensions, give or take the odd row over bridesmaids’ dresses. The “no speaks” had eased just a little by the time “best man” William escorted his brother down the aisle in May 2018.

Then five months later came the conclusive and determining rupture — the division that has lasted to the present day — though here the brothers’ retelling of history diverged. As Harry explained it to Oprah, Meghan’s Australian tour success sowed the jealousies that caused feelings to “change”. According to this scenario, William and Kate resented the Diana-like popularity that was generated by Harry’s wife. William had a different recollection.

We now know that Princes William and Harry were no longer on speaking terms before the Sussexes set off for Australia. Feelings had already “changed”, as Harry put it, and drastically so. The brothers had parted on extremely poor terms, with the trouble centring on Meghan’s stringent treatment and alleged bullying of her staff.

Most Kensington Palace courtiers were noted for the comparatively long tenures of their comfortable and prestigious jobs. But it came to look as if employees could not wait to escape service with Harry and Meghan. Those who left formed themselves into an informal fraternity that they titled the “Sussex Survivors’ Club”. They had finally hit back, and their organising agent had been PR man Jason Knauf.

The joint communications secretary for Kensington Palace — who was still, at that date, working on behalf of both of the brothers and their wives — had become concerned by the numerous stories of mistreatment being brought to him by colleagues whom he knew well and trusted.

Texas-born and New Zealand-educated, Knauf, 34, was a popular character in Kensington Palace, widely noted for his friendliness and loyalty towards his colleagues. He had been considered a real “catch” when the brothers snared him from the Royal Bank of Scotland in 2015, and one of his concerns was that professional management practices should be more effectively enforced inside the traditional British palace. Knauf’s American sensibilities caused him to see the Meghan situation as raising principles of human resources management in the palace system that needed to be formally addressed.

Knauf’s first priority was to set down the facts, as he saw them, for the record: “I’m very concerned,” he emailed to William’s private secretary Simon Case, in a document he drafted in October 2018, “that the duchess was able to bully two PAs out of the household in the past year.”

Knauf described Meghan’s treatment of one aide as “totally unacceptable . . . the duchess seems intent”, he wrote, “on always having someone in her sights”. Specifying another staff member, Knauf alleged Meghan had been bullying her as well, “seeking to undermine her confidence”. His office had received “report after report”, he wrote, from people who had witnessed “unacceptable behaviour” by Meghan towards this member of staff.

“Meghan governed by fear,” claimed one courtier. “So many people said it. Nothing was ever good enough for her. [She] humiliated staff in meetings, [would] shout at them, [would] cut them off email chains — and then demand to know why they hadn’t done anything.”

As early as 2017, around the time of the couple’s engagement, according to a subsequent report in The Times, a senior aide had spoken to the couple about the difficulties caused by their treatment of staff. “It’s not my job to coddle people,” Meghan was said to have replied.

“Americans can be much more direct,” wrote the authors Omid Scobie and Carolyn Durand in defence of the duchess, “and that often doesn’t sit well in the much more refined institution of the monarchy.”

A Brit might have raised an eyebrow at Meghan’s alleged behaviour, then looked the other way. The Yank decided to act. Knauf was actually one of Meghan’s most senior advisers — her chief adviser, in fact, when it came to public relations. Earlier that year she had gone to Knauf for help when drafting the disputed letter of severance that she sent to her father. She valued his PR expertise.

Before that, Knauf had helped Harry to word the fierce anti-media statements that he had framed to try to protect Meghan from press harassment, both as his girlfriend and then as his fiancée. The PR man had taken considerable stick from some of his non-royal contacts who criticised him as being overprotective in fighting the newcomer’s corner. Like so many people in all the palaces, Knauf had started off on Meghan’s side.

But as the months went by the American’s feelings became more ambiguous, as numerous colleagues — women whom he greatly respected — continued to bring him stories of what they said they had suffered at Meghan’s hands.

“I can’t stop shaking,” one aide had told a colleague in anticipation of an encounter with Meghan. Another reported that the prospect of confrontation with the duchess had made her “feel sick”. “Emotional cruelty and manipulation”, were the words of a third, “which I guess could also be called bullying.”

The b-word featured prominently in the accounts of several, along with an even more sinister set of initials: PTSD. Post-traumatic stress disorder was a deeply serious condition to allege — flashbacks, nightmares and feelings of deep anxiety — but that was how one complainant said that they had felt.

Several people maintained they had been “humiliated” by the duchess, and that criticism extended to Harry as well.

“I overheard a conversation between Harry and one of his top aides,” recalled one Kensington Palace courtier. “Harry was screaming and screaming down the phone. Team Sussex was a really toxic environment. People shouting and screaming in each other’s faces.”

Shouting and screaming? PTSD? Making people feel sick? Prince William went ballistic when he heard the “dossier of distress” that Knauf had gathered. We do not know whether the communications secretary brought his allegations directly to his boss or submitted them via Simon Case. What we do know is that the prince was astonished and horrified. He was instantly furious at what he heard.

“I remember Christian Jones [William’s press secretary and later private secretary] explaining to me how the Cams [the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge] are paternalistic with their staff,” recalls one royal correspondent. “They copy the Queen in that respect with all her Christmas parties and Christmas presents to her people. They’re proud to treat their staff like family. They recognise that they don’t get paid loads of money, so they are just really nice to them. So this was a very deep clash of philosophies, with Meghan being used to a Hollywood service culture — getting exactly what she wanted whenever she wanted in that famous way that Harry said.”

William personally knew and liked all the individuals whom Knauf had named in his dossier. The prince regarded them as assets to his household — colleagues to be cherished and for whom he was responsible. Human beings. Like Knauf, the prince was appalled that his respected staff may have been put in this position.

For William, Knauf’s allegations also clarified something that the prince had long believed — that Meghan was fundamentally hostile towards the royal system, which she failed to understand as an outsider. William wondered if she had not wanted to leave from the very start — even dreaming, perhaps, that she could whisk Harry back with her to North America.

But Meghan’s lawyers and PR representatives said this was quite the wrong interpretation of their client’s thinking and behaviour in a statement that they issued to The Times early in March 2021. They denied all allegations of bullying as inaccurate and the product of what they described as a “smear campaign”. The duchess wished to fit in and be accepted, they insisted. She had left her life in North America to commit herself to her new role.

I have never met Jason Knauf. What you have just read is based upon the published accusations that Knauf set down on paper — refuted as “defamatory”, it must be stressed again, and “based on misleading and harmful information” in the view of the Duchess of Sussex’s lawyers. It also relies upon William’s personal account of these events to one of his friends who then spoke to this author.

The moment the prince heard the bullying allegations, he related to this friend, he got straight on the phone to talk to Harry — and when Harry flared up in furious defence of his wife, the elder brother persisted. Harry shut off his phone angrily, so William went to speak to him personally. The prince was horrified by what he had just been told about Meghan’s alleged behaviour, and he wanted to hear what Harry had to say.

The showdown between the two siblings was fierce and bitter. William’s pre-engagement questioning of Meghan’s suitability had been quite reasonable, in William’s opinion. His fraternal doubts had been provisional, based upon how the new recruit appeared to be. The elder brother did not really know Meghan in those early days.

But now William had seen enough of his sister-in-law to feel sure that, sadly, he did know her and that many of his reservations linked unhappily with what Knauf’s colleagues had alleged. William believed Meghan was following a plan — “agenda” was the word he used to his friend — and the accusations he had just heard were alarming. Kate, he said, had been wary of her from the start.

Meghan was undermining some precious principles of the monarchy, if she really was treating her staff in this way, and William was upset that she seemed to be stealing his beloved brother away from him. Later courtiers would coin a hashtag — #freeHarry. It was only half a joke.

“Meghan portrayed herself as the victim,” recalled one Kensington Palace staffer, “but she was the bully. People felt run over by her. They didn’t know how to handle this woman. They thought she was a complete narcissist and sociopath — basically unhinged. Which was why the pair of them were drawn to each other in the first place — both damaged goods.”

William felt deeply wounded. “Hurt” and “betrayed” were the two feelings that he described to his friend. The elder brother had always felt so protective. He had seen it as his job to look out for Harry but this was the moment the protection had to stop. At the end of the day the British crown and all it stood for with its ancient traditions, styles and values — the mission of the monarchy — had to matter more to William than his brother did.

Harry, for his part, was equally furious that William should give credence to the accusations against Meghan, and he was fiercely combative in his wife’s defence. Some sources maintain that in the heat of the argument Harry actually accused someone in the family of concepts that were “racist”. But it must be stressed that neither brother has ever confirmed that the hateful r-word was used face to face.

Only William and Harry can know what they said to each other and they have respectfully maintained their silence on that. But Harry made clear to the world in his interview with Oprah that he considered his family’s response to Meghan to have been essentially racist — using the heavily freighted code words “unconscious bias” to provide an intellectual framework for his analysis.

Where could the two brothers go after such painful and damning notions had been thrown into their debate?

We have reached the crux of the drama. What painfully unforgettable and surely unforgivable things have been said? These are not passing differences. They are two core sets of values in conflict — love versus duty — going to the very heart and deriving from the deepest beliefs and loyalties of each man. Two opposing identities butting heads. In the months following the tragic and not-obviously bridgeable rift of October 2018 between William and Harry, the younger brother solidified his belief that his family were suffering from “unconscious bias”.

William, for his part, felt just as strongly about Meghan and the need for her subversive “agenda” to be removed from the operations of the British monarchy, which she did not appear to understand or respect. He certainly wanted Meghan removed, for a start, from the hitherto harmonious joint household that he and his brother had operated together for the best part of a decade. William simply did not want her or Harry around any more.

When accounts of the rift started seeping out through the winter months that followed, it was generally assumed that the volatile Harry must have set the pace in the splitting up of the joint Kensington Palace household. He was the brother who visibly departed, stalking off to set up a new home in Windsor, with offices for himself and Meghan in Buckingham Palace.

But the reverse was the case. It was William who made the decisive move. Following his furious confrontation with his younger brother in the autumn of 2018, the prince instructed Simon Case to start the process of dividing their two households immediately. William wished to be separated from Meghan on a day-to-day basis — and that meant being separated from his brother as well.

“William,” says a friend, “threw Harry out.”

©Robert Lacey 2021 Extracted from Battle of Brothers: William, Harry and the Inside Story of a Family in Tumult by Robert Lacey, to be published by William Collins on June 24 at £9.99

[alolanrain]

Not sure if this was mentioned but how did everyone react to Ash being pregnant? Also how was the actual pregnancy itself? Did he have typical cravings, mood swings & all that jazz?

Did I info dumped? Hells yes. Do I really care? No because it’s about my fan kids and their family dammit!

There was a lot of... mixed reactions. Generally the more common one was joy and happiness! Most of Ash’s friends were excited when he gave them the news and swarmed both him and Raihan any chance they can get. The girls are the first children to be born in their large group surprisingly.

Celest, Raihan’s mother, didn’t really congratulate her son and Ash. More just... acknowledged? I would say. She was much more interested in Raihans every changing progress of being hammerlocks gym leader. Though Raihan and Ash are surprised when she still wants to keep tabs on Ash’s pregnancy. They both chalk it up to having to watch her daughters go through multiple miscarriages and her one grandchild born severely early. They take what warmth they can get and Ash is usually the one explaining things since Raihan gets Squeamish in hospital rooms and prefers to stay outside in the waiting room, that doesn’t stop him from constantly cupping Ash’s belly or laying kisses to it before they both go to sleep. She’s a lot more involved in the triplets pregnancy. Helping out a lot more and keeping in close contact with Ash to see if he needs anything.

Raihans two sisters, Minx and Venix who were twins as well, were down right jealous of Raihan. They each had more then one pregnancy lost and only Minx was able to have a baby boy who is just a few months old and still in the NICU because he was born at 7 and a half months old. Everyone is just surprised that he’s alive. When they found out that Ash is having twins they despised Ash even more. They wanted the life Ash was currently living. Sweet adoring husband, twins on the way, a steady career, a large group of friends who don’t try and leech from Ash’s bank account. Ash had it all in their eyes.

Though this doesn’t stop Ash from trying to bring the twins into anything baby related. Raihan had explained after the initial sudden backlash from the twins. it was usually kept in the dark because his family is well known and very rich, this could potentially ruin both of the girls reputation if people found out. Especially since they were basically infertile at this point in life. Ash had started asking simple things; what color would look good in this room? I like this theme but this one is also pretty nice? would you like to help pick out some books? Raihan once again had to pull him aside and explain that what he’s doing is sweet, and even Celest acknowledges Ash’s actual goal, but it’s hurting the twins because they feel like this is some backhanded way of Ash gloating.

Ash denied venomously, which Raihan quickly dispelled, that he would never do such a harmful thing. He just wanted to see if the twins wanted to be apart at all. Since Minx is still a mom to a few month old baby and she hasn’t even set up her nursery still. Raihan agrees again that what Ash is doing is good in thought but not in practice. He’s still peeved but he leave’s he girls alone and goes so far to apologize through Raihan in fear of mixing the pot even more.

Forest, Raihans older twin, is much more involved in the pregnancy. Usually helping Raihan move furniture around and help set up the big nursery. He isn’t very warm, anyone but Raihan in his family isn’t warm, but again Forest is much more involved. Especially since he has his own twin’s, a daughter and a son, and he and Raihan jokes that twins just seemingly run in the family. He brings the little ones around for Ash to “get a feel” for kids, Ash snickered because their about the same age Max and Bonnie were, but smiled at the kind gesture. Even though Raihan jabbed at him that he was just looking for free babysitting while he’s here.

Rose doesn’t even know Ash is pregnant. Ignoring Raihans calls that are not on chairmen tk gym leader level and any card he gets goes straight to the mail without him even knowing. Know Oleana on the other hand knows and since she has to keep Rose’s best interest, and knowing that the older twins and Celest don’t really care for Ash, she decides that it’s best to sabotage the pregnancy. Rose finds out after getting an angry call from Venix laminated that Raihan, her younger brother, has a successful marriage and now two new born twin girls before she did. It takes Rose into complete shock before he immediately leaves his desk and books it to Hammerlocke... where he’s barred from entering and or seeing the couple and their babies. 

Rose is furious and calls up Celest to demand what the hell is going on. It isn’t until then what he learned what Oleana has been trying to do and how Raihan had tried to get Rose involved but ultimately Rose never answered Raihan which was enough for Raihan to go very low contact unless it’s for league reasons. Rose is silenced and dejected. He really Had done all those things, it’s only right thag Raihan doesn’t even want him to see the babies. After getting back to his office in the same day, and cutting down Oleana’s pay by a good chunk, he keeps to the sidelines.

It isn’t until Ash is pregnant with the triplets does he personally visits Rose in the office to ask if Rose is still willing to be in their little families life. They still need their grandpa after all. Rose immediately jumps at the chance and soon becomes the biggest help besides Delia again. Making sure that Raihans workload is cut slacked and even asking a few gym leaders closer to him to be a little stronger so Raihan doesn’t have to face to many challengers since it’s mid season and will be near the end when the triplets are born.

Delia is very involved with Ash. Coming so far to rent a month in a AirBnb just so Ash can stay off his feet and Raihan isn’t to stressed between Ash and his gym. Celest actually takes time from being a very important CEO of her company and to come help Delia help with Ash. Though she’s more into lecturing and talking with Ash then actually doing stuff around the house.

Red calls daily, Green and Blue usually heard in the background with their joint kids Tracey and Mackenzie, at least twice a week. It’s short calls, just a check up on how he’s feeling and if he’s craving anything Red can Champion Express Mail over from Kanto to him.

Silver usually just texts, he loves his brothers but they can be talkative in their own way, but he constantly assures Ash that the moment they get the notice that he’s in labor almost everyone is flying out to Galar. Gold agrees through actual call’s with Ritchie by his side, his new top elite four, and that they already have shit ready and packed.

Giovanni is envolved but in the distance. He originally planned on pacing up the process of taking over the world but half of his spies, gown to spy on Ash and Raihan, had come back nearly mauled. Soon almost all of his grunts and even higher up goons were being dragged into HQ’s around the world, bloody and beatened. It took some time to figure out that it was Ash’s Pokémon doing most of the damage, in Galar and Kanto, while the rest were from legendaries. The only team that can get on by is Jessie, James, and Meowth. Though they seem to immediately get the memo to stay at a distance from Ash at all times, never to enter personal property, and to keep all scheming on the down low and out of rang where Ash can’t be stubborn and get up to go help. So Gio has to be content to just sit and quietly wait as he watches Ash give birth to his second set of grandkids. He gets to watch Delia when she comes around so that’s nice, Gio actually misses her dearly.

The pregnancy itself gave them a few scares. The biggest being that Ash is actually pregnant. which takes a lot of arguments about Ash having to be more careful and even forcing them a month apart without talking, this is and still is their biggest argument yet in their relationship. The second biggest scare was Oleana actively trying to spike Ash’s nonalcoholic drinks with alcohol, certain drugs, and other means they haven’t found the answer to.

Since Ash is technically the physical link between Pokémon and humans, what every thinks and also how he has all these abilities, certain human drugs make his body shut down and reject anything. Putting him in life threatening condition immediately to the point where the twins are unable to be saved.

Ash wasn’t expecting how big his stomach would grow. He originally thought that the baby, yes one baby at the time, would take his size. Unlucky in that department both girls have taken near Raihans size, though Cadenza is closer to Ash’s height still, and that also means big babies and equally streatched stomachs. There was a lot of sleepless nights and crying sessions. Ash was abnormally lazy and tired for himself, though expected, and the only cravings he’s gotten was curly fries and vanilla and chocolate ice cream.

[alarriefantasy]

Are there any abo fics where the omega fucks their alpha on the regs or am I just gonna have to write it myself?

LMAO well definitely still write one, I am ALWAYS IN NEED OF MORE ABO!!!! :) Also, I hope I found the kind of stuff you’re looking for!!

Night Out by HelloAmHere (And the second part!)

Words: 9k

Symphony hall was the first place Louis had felt at home in this city, and he always had the box to himself. Until tonight.

flash forward (we're taking on the world together) by hickeylou 

Words: 44k

In which Omega Louis and Alpha Harry are absolutely perfect for each other and say I love you too much.

Who Would've Thought by whoknows

Words: 44k

The idea doesn’t come to Louis until they’ve been at the bungalow for a couple of days. Harry has no idea that he’s going to pop a knot. He’s been living his life with the expectation that he’s going to be a beta, and Louis isn’t going to tell him otherwise.

Louis is an omega, though, and most omegas want to be filled up with a knot, fucked the way their bodies are made to be fucked, and Louis is no different. In ten years he wants to have an alpha waiting for him at home who will hold him down and fuck him exactly the way Louis wants to be fucked without worrying that they’re going to expect him to stay at home, open a joint bank account, raise a litter of babies, cook and clean and, most importantly, be submissive. For that to happen Louis needs an entirely different kind of alpha.

And so the plan is born.

Seeing Blind by zedi

Words: 46k

Louis finally turns his head in Liam’s direction, knows his face is showing the longing he’s been aching with ever since it took root in his chest. “What the fuck do I do, Liam? He wouldn’t want me like that, but I want-” his voice cracks, and he turns his face back downwards. “What do you do when you’re not perfect for the person who’s perfect for you?”

OR the one where Harry’s an independent omega who likes to have his fun and Louis is the blind alpha that changes Harry’s priorities.

The Triplets Mate by fucksinglelouis

Words: 48k

Edward, Harry, and Marcel Styles had decided to mate together before they could even decipher the significance of the act; but now, looking back, they think it may not have been the smartest decision.

Each man has a different personality, and different needs that have to be met by an Omega, that have caused difficulty in their search.Louis Tomlinson has been lusted after ever since he presented. He's a pure, extremely fertile Omega. He has a steady job, and lives with his best friend, an Alpha named Liam. He's perfectly content with his life, and doesn't plan on changing it for anyone.

Until he meets the triplets.

lemon eyes by turnyourankle

Words: 50k

It's not proper for omegas to mess around with alphas before finding their bondmate. But Harry doesn't give a damn what's proper and fully intends on getting as much experience as he can before even trying to find one. As far as he's concerned, the right alpha won't care, and he'll have some fun on the way.

And who better to start with than Louis Tomlinson, the alpha with the worst reputation on campus?

Where You Lay by HamPalpert

Words: 86k

When Louis's upcoming heat threatens his success at his new dream job, he asks the best (and only) person he can think of to help him through it: his best mates' best mate, Harry Styles. Harry reluctantly accepts, and together the two navigate a strange friends with benefits relationship that quickly turns complicated.

I'm me when I'm with you by Deidei

Words: 86k

AU in which Louis finally is able to attend the University he’s been dreaming off: Queens University. But fate works in mysterious ways and it certainly doesn’t care about your dreams nor your plans. No, fate had a whole other future planned for him the moment he met the popular, gorgeous and mighty Alpha named, Harry Styles who accidentally impregnates him after a one nightstand…

Accidents happen, but not all accidents are bad.

Swim In The Smoke by whoknows

Words: 101k

“What about this, Captain?” Liam asks, nudging the boy kneeling between their feet with the toe of his boot. The boy hisses and swipes at him, slurring out something unintelligible around the makeshift gag Niall had to stuff in his mouth. He misses by a mile and tries again, just as ineffectively.

Harry looks down at him, at the way the sun streams over his face and shoulders, at the way the gag stretches his mouth, lips pink and chapped. He’s lithe and pretty, smudged all over with dirt. They had found him tied up below deck, mostly unconscious, next to a barrel full of gold. He’s clearly a prisoner, but there’s something familiar about him, something that niggles at Harry’s brain. Something he can’t quite put his finger on.

“Put him in my cabin,” Harry decides, turning back to deal with the rest of the loot. The boys screams out jumbled curse words at Harry’s back, muffled by the gag, and Harry can’t understand any of it.

Fucking Animals by pointerbrother

Words: 116k

Louis is the frontman of an equal rights-movement, author of a book about beta-omega marriage and the struggles of being born and boxed into a personality you don't necessarily feel you fit. The notion that an omega must want to be with an alpha or else he or she's just settling for less, is bullshit.

But, fucking hell.

Dirty secret by iilarryii

Words: 122k

Or a Mulan AU where Louis is an omega who takes his father's place in the war.

Your highness by Latefan_5sos1d_wherewasi

Words: 171k

Harry is the prince and Louis is the maid. When Louis signed up to be a maid of the royal family he didn’t expect to have a hard time dealing with the prince. Harry took an interest to the little maid.

Going Nowhere Alone by SS98

Words: 154k

There's Harry, Edward and Marcel. Harry serves as pack leader to the last remaining house of werewolves. Edward, his brother, finds joy in sex and banter with strangers. Marcel plays along for as long as he can before morals corrupt his act.

Louis romanticises life so it doesn't seem as shallow to him. Being Omega isn't a joyride but three Alphas are determined to change that.

Only You Can Be My Alpha by wubwubnparmaham

Words: 196k

Louis has never liked being an Omega. As if it wasn't enough to despise what he was born into, he couldn't even be what he was correctly.Harry Styles changes all of that.

OR

The one where Louis is banished from his tribe, and lands himself in Harry's instead. The alluring Pack Alpha makes Louis question his nature and he doesn't know how he feels about that. But you can't fight destiny.

pray for some sweet simplicity by delsicle

Words: 237k

Or, an AU where motorcycle racing is the biggest sport in a heavily divided world, Louis is trying to take control of his own destiny, and Harry is in for more than he bargained for.

Four's Company by vampire_angel_z

Words: 275k

The alpha triplets need a mate. Louis is too perfect to be true.

[darcyfarber]

Yes! Married Couples Should Share a Bank Account

When Andrea and I got married in 2008, we opened up a joint checking account together. Both of our paychecks were directly deposited into the one joint account and all of our expenses came out of the same joint account. This is how we have handled our finances since day one and we both couldn’t imagine doing it any other way. But what about those who don’t share money in a marriage (or relationship)?  When I first started teaching personal finance, I had my blinders on. My focus was showing people how to create a simple budget, save more money and pay off debt.  One of the very first couples I started money coaching caught me by complete surprise: They had completely separate bank accounts!

Over 40% of married couples today have separate bank accounts.

Should you combine your finances?

My humble opinion – absolutely.

But, let me also tell you why I think it is so important.

Early on in our marriage I thought buying flowers for my wife would make her happy. However, her love language (per Gary Chapman’s The Five Love Languages), is acts of service and words of affirmation – NOT gifts.

Full Transparency is Good for Marriage

I’m not saying you have separate accounts because you are trying to hide anything from your spouse, but it could appear that way at no fault of your own.

If you’ve been married long enough, you know by now that communication errors between the two of you happen and when you take the 30,000 foot view of the disagreement, it’s often hard to pinpoint who was at fault.

Here’s an example:

The point of this example it wasn’t her fault or my fault – rather it was a simple misconception between us. 

When you have SEPARATE accounts, there will be an increased chance for misconceptions. 

Maybe you notice she’s wearing new clothes and you start wondering how much those clothes cost.

Then you start going down the rabbit hole of why she is spending this money and why she didn’t chip in more for groceries last month.

Oh, I see…your expensive clothes were more important that food for our family. 

Then resentment starts to creep in and all of a sudden she starts asking why you’re so quiet.

And then she starts thinking that you’re hiding something and this is why you’re so quiet….and as you can see this plays out like a dog chasing it’s tail.

If there was one joint bank account, they could simply login and see you didn’t buy those expensive clothes.

They were free because you signed up for a free trial at Rent the Runway (place to rent designer clothes). You didn’t spend any money at all!

What Happens if the Unthinkable Happens?

Like I said above, Andrea have always shared one bank account since we said “I do”.

However, it wasn’t until a few years into our marriage when we sat down with a financial planner and he started asking questions about the finances.

I was quick to have all the answers and I will never forget when Brent (the financial planner) told me to stop answering all the questions because he wanted to see what Andrea’s response would be.

Andrea already knew about every transaction in our lives (she could see them), but she wasn’t quite sure how it was all managed. She knew how much money there was in our lives, but didn’t know where it all was and how to access it.

When Brent asked me why she didn’t know where everything was as, I replied with the obvious:

“Well, she can just ask me and I will tell her”.

Then Brent said,

“But what if you’re not around to tell her?”

Houston, we have a problem here.

He was spot on.

None of us know what today brings, right?

Also, I know the fact that you’re reading an email from me tells me that you are the one in the relationship who is the manager of the money.

Even if you currently share finances, something tells me you do most of the handling of the finances.

Am I right?

What happens if you’re not around to show you spouse the money stuff? 

Can you imagine the stress you are going to add onto your spouse if something happens to you AND they have no idea how to get into any of the finances in your lives? Don’t let this happen. It’s time to start sharing the money.

You Will Share a Bed, But Not a Bank Account?

I stole this saying from One Bed, One Bank Account: Better Conversations on Money and Marriage by Carrie and Derek Olsen.

Let me ask this: are we really willing to share a house, kids, grandkids, a bed, and everything else – but not a bank account?

Food for thought.

Create Goals, Build Dreams and Plan Your Future

She’s thinking “yaaaay for the future”. I’m thinking “please pay attention” 😂

Money touches every single aspect of our lives. Everything.

You and your spouse should sit down together and create your goals, build on your dreams, and plan out where you want to both be TOGETHER in your future.

And guess what?

These dreams, goals and plans will depend on money at some point. Money doesn’t just buy “stuff”, it also buys your time and freedom from a life of working.

Sure, it may work to dream big and plan out goals with separate bank accounts, but how much easier will it be when the dreams and goals go from his and hers to “ours”?

5. Budgeting is SIMPLE with One Bank Account

Since 2015 I have helped over 1,000 families create a budget and some of them refused to combine finances into one account. So we built their budget with separate bank accounts. 

One bank account would pay for the mortgage, the other bank account would pay for groceries. She would buy gifts for the kids at Christmas and he would then transfer money from his account to hers.

Then she would have to add this in as “income” into her budget but then offset it with the 50% she paid for gifts. Then there was a copay he paid at the doctor for one of the kids but since she had the health insurance, they had the discussion if it should just be a wash.

And, she made more than he did (by quite a lot) and he didn’t think it was right that the spending was 50/50 in terms of amount but not a percentage. We decided to give the 50% rule a try instead of splitting the dollar amounts down the middle, but now we were having to get a calculator out to figure out how much each would pay and if that would include overtime he qualified for.

Finally I said: This would be so much easier if we just had one account.

They tried it and it blew their minds —  so much simpler!

3 Tips for Successful Combining of Finances

If you don’t currently share money and you’re thinking of giving it a try, I can already feel your nerves about it. I one hundred percent get it – if it were that simple you probably would be sharing money by now, right?

Here are a few tricks I have seen work over the years when couples make the move to start sharing money.

1. Fair and Equal are Not the Same Thing in a Marriage

This is just my personal opinion, but women spend more money frequently but men spend even more money a few times per year. My wife will spend about 98% of our “Department Store” budget each month. 

Why?

Because I can wear the same clothes for 10 years and still like them. She cannot.

On the flip side, I will spend thousands of dollars on a new camera, a new tool, or a new grill – and this happens maybe 1-2x per year.

She probably still spends more money than me, but then again I didn’t have to push two kids out my belly after 9 months of back pain and 24 hours of labor.

Fair and equal are not the same thing.

2. Baby Steps to a Shared Joint Account is Okay

Many couples have a separate bank account because there was some financial issues in the past and trust was lost.

If this is you, then of course you are hesitant to move all the finances back together and you have every right to feel this way.

In this situation, what if you took a graduated approach to combined finances?

Maybe start with giving login access to each other’s accounts or sharing bank statement with each other?

Get everything out in the open – the good, the bad, and the ugly.

Once this has been accomplished, next open up a joint account and slowly start combining finances to it.

Maybe the first month the account is just for the mortgage and you equally fund it. Then next month you move into groceries, bills, etc.

Over time of the transparency, it will become easier to combine finances versus the ripping the bandaid method.

3. Don’t Let Amounts Get in the Way of the Finances

Chances are you both don’t make the same amount of money.

Maybe one of you works full-time outside of the home for an income and the other works full-time inside the home without an income.

The point is both of you are necessary and both of you contribute to the income – either directly or indirectly.

For years, Andrea made way more money than me.

She was a television news anchor and I was an entry level firefighter. One thing we did really well is we made sure to never call it her money or my money – it was OUR money since it was in OUR bank account together.

Also, remember tip #1: fair and equal are not the same thing. 

One of the saddest truths of today is that 50% of marriages will end in divorce. The #1 cause of divorce in North America is infidelity.

The #2 cause of divorce in North America is money problems and money fights.

I tell all newly weds I meet with that marriage is WORK and it’s 100% worth it. And, if you want to give yourself a giant advantage in a marriage/relationship – then combine the finances.

By doing this, you are essentially removing the #2 cause of divorce today!

Do You Share a Bank Account? 

If yes, why? 

If no, why not?

I would love to hear from you! Leave a comment below and let us all know your thoughts or ideas on one bank account verus separate bank accounts.

God bless and thanks for reading Money Peach!

Yes! Married Couples Should Share a Bank Account published first on https://mysingaporepools.weebly.com/

[kennethherrerablog]

Yes! Married Couples Should Share a Bank Account

When Andrea and I got married in 2008, we opened up a joint checking account together. Both of our paychecks were directly deposited into the one joint account and all of our expenses came out of the same joint account. This is how we have handled our finances since day one and we both couldn’t imagine doing it any other way. But what about those who don’t share money in a marriage (or relationship)?  When I first started teaching personal finance, I had my blinders on. My focus was showing people how to create a simple budget, save more money and pay off debt.  One of the very first couples I started money coaching caught me by complete surprise: They had completely separate bank accounts!

Over 40% of married couples today have separate bank accounts.

Should you combine your finances?

My humble opinion – absolutely.

But, let me also tell you why I think it is so important.

Early on in our marriage I thought buying flowers for my wife would make her happy. However, her love language (per Gary Chapman’s The Five Love Languages), is acts of service and words of affirmation – NOT gifts.

Full Transparency is Good for Marriage

I’m not saying you have separate accounts because you are trying to hide anything from your spouse, but it could appear that way at no fault of your own.

If you’ve been married long enough, you know by now that communication errors between the two of you happen and when you take the 30,000 foot view of the disagreement, it’s often hard to pinpoint who was at fault.

Here’s an example:

The point of this example it wasn’t her fault or my fault – rather it was a simple misconception between us. 

When you have SEPARATE accounts, there will be an increased chance for misconceptions. 

Maybe you notice she’s wearing new clothes and you start wondering how much those clothes cost.

Then you start going down the rabbit hole of why she is spending this money and why she didn’t chip in more for groceries last month.

Oh, I see…your expensive clothes were more important that food for our family. 

Then resentment starts to creep in and all of a sudden she starts asking why you’re so quiet.

And then she starts thinking that you’re hiding something and this is why you’re so quiet….and as you can see this plays out like a dog chasing it’s tail.

If there was one joint bank account, they could simply login and see you didn’t buy those expensive clothes.

They were free because you signed up for a free trial at Rent the Runway (place to rent designer clothes). You didn’t spend any money at all!

What Happens if the Unthinkable Happens?

Like I said above, Andrea have always shared one bank account since we said “I do”.

However, it wasn’t until a few years into our marriage when we sat down with a financial planner and he started asking questions about the finances.

I was quick to have all the answers and I will never forget when Brent (the financial planner) told me to stop answering all the questions because he wanted to see what Andrea’s response would be.

Andrea already knew about every transaction in our lives (she could see them), but she wasn’t quite sure how it was all managed. She knew how much money there was in our lives, but didn’t know where it all was and how to access it.

When Brent asked me why she didn’t know where everything was as, I replied with the obvious:

“Well, she can just ask me and I will tell her”.

Then Brent said,

“But what if you’re not around to tell her?”

Houston, we have a problem here.

He was spot on.

None of us know what today brings, right?

Also, I know the fact that you’re reading an email from me tells me that you are the one in the relationship who is the manager of the money.

Even if you currently share finances, something tells me you do most of the handling of the finances.

Am I right?

What happens if you’re not around to show you spouse the money stuff? 

Can you imagine the stress you are going to add onto your spouse if something happens to you AND they have no idea how to get into any of the finances in your lives? Don’t let this happen. It’s time to start sharing the money.

You Will Share a Bed, But Not a Bank Account?

I stole this saying from One Bed, One Bank Account: Better Conversations on Money and Marriage by Carrie and Derek Olsen.

Let me ask this: are we really willing to share a house, kids, grandkids, a bed, and everything else – but not a bank account?

Food for thought.

Create Goals, Build Dreams and Plan Your Future

She’s thinking “yaaaay for the future”. I’m thinking “please pay attention” 😂

Money touches every single aspect of our lives. Everything.

You and your spouse should sit down together and create your goals, build on your dreams, and plan out where you want to both be TOGETHER in your future.

And guess what?

These dreams, goals and plans will depend on money at some point. Money doesn’t just buy “stuff”, it also buys your time and freedom from a life of working.

Sure, it may work to dream big and plan out goals with separate bank accounts, but how much easier will it be when the dreams and goals go from his and hers to “ours”?

5. Budgeting is SIMPLE with One Bank Account

Since 2015 I have helped over 1,000 families create a budget and some of them refused to combine finances into one account. So we built their budget with separate bank accounts. 

One bank account would pay for the mortgage, the other bank account would pay for groceries. She would buy gifts for the kids at Christmas and he would then transfer money from his account to hers.

Then she would have to add this in as “income” into her budget but then offset it with the 50% she paid for gifts. Then there was a copay he paid at the doctor for one of the kids but since she had the health insurance, they had the discussion if it should just be a wash.

And, she made more than he did (by quite a lot) and he didn’t think it was right that the spending was 50/50 in terms of amount but not a percentage. We decided to give the 50% rule a try instead of splitting the dollar amounts down the middle, but now we were having to get a calculator out to figure out how much each would pay and if that would include overtime he qualified for.

Finally I said: This would be so much easier if we just had one account.

They tried it and it blew their minds —  so much simpler!

3 Tips for Successful Combining of Finances

If you don’t currently share money and you’re thinking of giving it a try, I can already feel your nerves about it. I one hundred percent get it – if it were that simple you probably would be sharing money by now, right?

Here are a few tricks I have seen work over the years when couples make the move to start sharing money.

1. Fair and Equal are Not the Same Thing in a Marriage

This is just my personal opinion, but women spend more money frequently but men spend even more money a few times per year. My wife will spend about 98% of our “Department Store” budget each month. 

Why?

Because I can wear the same clothes for 10 years and still like them. She cannot.

On the flip side, I will spend thousands of dollars on a new camera, a new tool, or a new grill – and this happens maybe 1-2x per year.

She probably still spends more money than me, but then again I didn’t have to push two kids out my belly after 9 months of back pain and 24 hours of labor.

Fair and equal are not the same thing.

2. Baby Steps to a Shared Joint Account is Okay

Many couples have a separate bank account because there was some financial issues in the past and trust was lost.

If this is you, then of course you are hesitant to move all the finances back together and you have every right to feel this way.

In this situation, what if you took a graduated approach to combined finances?

Maybe start with giving login access to each other’s accounts or sharing bank statement with each other?

Get everything out in the open – the good, the bad, and the ugly.

Once this has been accomplished, next open up a joint account and slowly start combining finances to it.

Maybe the first month the account is just for the mortgage and you equally fund it. Then next month you move into groceries, bills, etc.

Over time of the transparency, it will become easier to combine finances versus the ripping the bandaid method.

3. Don’t Let Amounts Get in the Way of the Finances

Chances are you both don’t make the same amount of money.

Maybe one of you works full-time outside of the home for an income and the other works full-time inside the home without an income.

The point is both of you are necessary and both of you contribute to the income – either directly or indirectly.

For years, Andrea made way more money than me.

She was a television news anchor and I was an entry level firefighter. One thing we did really well is we made sure to never call it her money or my money – it was OUR money since it was in OUR bank account together.

Also, remember tip #1: fair and equal are not the same thing. 

One of the saddest truths of today is that 50% of marriages will end in divorce. The #1 cause of divorce in North America is infidelity.

The #2 cause of divorce in North America is money problems and money fights.

I tell all newly weds I meet with that marriage is WORK and it’s 100% worth it. And, if you want to give yourself a giant advantage in a marriage/relationship – then combine the finances.

By doing this, you are essentially removing the #2 cause of divorce today!

Do You Share a Bank Account? 

If yes, why? 

If no, why not?

I would love to hear from you! Leave a comment below and let us all know your thoughts or ideas on one bank account verus separate bank accounts.

God bless and thanks for reading Money Peach!

Yes! Married Couples Should Share a Bank Account published first on https://justinbetreviews.tumblr.com/

[logan-after-dark]

Feb 22nd 2018

Had a very long and involved lucid dream last night. Parts of it are kind of personal, but I decided to share it anyways because I’m trying to be open about this stuff now. Anyways, here it goes... Under the cut so as not to flood your dashes lol:

I was at a hospital with a few friends and my fiance apparently, a guy named Kevin that was in my class in elementary school. Also, I was pregnant. I didn’t look pregnant when I checked myself out in the mirror, nor did I feel like I was pregnant (or at least what I expect pregnant to feel like), but that was something that was mentioned here and there in reference to me so there you have it.

Kevin was wearing pale blue scrubs because he worked at the hospital, although today he was on a break or done his shift so he could see me and our friends. We were sitting and hanging out in a cafeteria, and someone commented on how nice the nurse was to me earlier for my tests. Kevin was like “Oh yeah, we should get her something as a thank you”, and before I could ask for a chocolate chip muffin for myself he had already gotten up and gone into the cafeteria kitchen. I guess because he was in his scrubs he could do that? The cafeteria staff recognized and greeted him, so I guess it was cool by them.

He returns a while later with this chocolate milkshake-type thing with chocolate chips in a plastic cup with a red straw. We didn’t know when the nurse who helped me would be by, so we set it on the corner of the empty table adjacent to ours to wait.

Everyone was socializing with each other but I was feeling somewhat restless, so I get up and walk around the busy cafeteria. I’m starting to realize that this is a lucid dream, so I’m checking out my surroundings before I make any major changes because I don’t want to wake up just yet. I notice two exit doors at the far end. Both are glass with pushbars that lead into stairwells, but both have messages spraypainted in black on the glass with clumsy lopsided handwriting. One says “The end”, signifying the end of the dream I think, and the other says “School’s Out.”

Before I try the latter door, I walk over to the melting milkshake thing and claim it for myself, eagerly drinking that chocolatey goodness. It’s been sitting there for what feels like forever now, and this nurse hasn’t showed, plus it’s my dream so I’m going to do what I want XD Then I immediately walk over to the window and look outside. It’s a dreary grey day and nothing interesting is happening in the hospital parking lot. I absently consider making a meteor hit just to break up the boredom, but then I reason with myself “No, it’s a hospital. Don’t give them more patients” XD I watch as one of the groundskeepers on a riding mower nearly gets stuck in a ditch though, and wish that he gets out unharmed, which he does shortly thereafter.

As I’m standing at the window looking outside and sucking down this delicious milkshake thing, three guys come up to it to look out also, at least one of which is standing uncomfortably behind me. So, I have to ask them a question.

“Wing?”

“Huh?”

“Nevermind.”

The first guy leaves and I sidestep over to the next guy.

“You, same question.”

“Uh, no. Who is that?”

“I’m looking for someone.”

He remains there but it’s awkward now, so I’m the one to leave. The third guy I didn’t even ask, he just seemed confused so I knew it wasn’t him either. At that point I bail to go sit next to the fiance the dream has assigned me.

Kevin sees he drinking the milkshake he bought for the nurse and is instantly upset with me. I explain that she hasn’t come out yet and it was just sitting there melting, but he’s still pissy. Then I say “we can just buy another one with my money, don’t sweat it.” Upon saying that I realize that in the dream’s narrative we have a joint banking account. I still have money of my own though, I’m sure, so I continue to insist and he continues to counter that “we can’t afford it.” And that apparently the drink I stole cost fourteen dollars. We go back and forth like this for a little bit until he grits his teeth and calls me something nasty. Selfish or self-centered or something like that. He bites it off with such venom that at that point I’m just like ‘Okay, fuck this noise, I’m trying that door now.’

I get up and walk purposefully towards the door spraypainted with School’s Out and shove the bar with both hands to open it. It flies open easily and I start down the stairs.

Behind me, my friends are looking at Kevin mouths agape like, “that was your future wife and baby mama you just insulted.” He starts to panic and decides to get up and follow me.

I’m descending these stairs in the fastest way possible that I know, which, apparently, involves swinging from the supports underneath like monkey bars XD I hear him coming down the stairs after me and I’m trying to keep my steady pace as quickly and quietly as possible. I’m definitely trying to avoid him but I also want to see what else this dream has to offer uninterrupted by this side drama.

And, I still want to find Wing.

There are some M.C. Escher staircase shenanigans and me briefly hiding here and there a good distance behind Kevin, just out of his peripheral vision when he whips his head around looking for me, then at one point I get into a small gift shop area with displays of chocolates and small romantic cards. I hang out there and a lovely well-dressed female store attendant approaches me all smiles. I think she had a blonde bob and blue eyes, and a nice grey women’s pantsuit with a knee-length skirt. Her makeup was sharp and she overall just looked very well put together.

“Are you finding everything okay?”

“I’m good. Listen, I’m not interested in buying anything, I’m just trying to get away from my fiance. He’s mad at me.”

With that, I went behind one of the card racks and, though she was confused as to why I’d be hiding from someone I’m engaged to, she followed to stand in front of me and provide more cover. Two more attendants came out of nowhere to do the same thing, as I pretended to be perusing the cards and they pretended to be fixing the display. Once Kevin was for SURE gone, I thanked them profusely and went on my way.

At this point, I start asking for directions or if anyone knows where I can find Wing. I don’t remember whether anyone was successful at pointing me in the right direction or not, but I managed to find my way anyways. I walked into this very nice office - brown leather lounge chairs, deep green office carpet, mahogany everything and lined with bookshelves full of tomes of all sorts. There was a secretary who stood when she saw me and gestured around a corner, who said “He’s been expecting you.”

Holy shit. My heart’s in my throat. I head around the corner and into the open door.

The office is much larger than the waiting area was, but it’s just as extravagantly decorated, complete with homey little electric fireplace built into the wall with a brick mantle around it. There’s a black leather couch with it’s back to me as I walk in, and another along the adjacent wall facing the fireplace and a TV mounted on the wall above it. This room isn’t as tidy as the other one, as where are stacks of books here and there, and end tables and a coffee table with some bottles and papers cluttering them.

Sitting on the couch with his back to me, is a man who turns to see me and smiles.

“I’ll be honest - You’re not quite what I was expecting,” I admit.

He had black hair and red skin, with two long, spindly segmented horns curled back protruding from the top of his head. His clothing is all black with a cape - think Elias from Ancient Magus Bride - complete with black gloves that hide his segmented skeletal fingers. He’s utterly handsome though, and I’m definitely drawn to him. I round the couch and sit next to him, and we stay like that for a moment like it’s our first date.

This is the first time I’ve found him in one of my dreams. This is Wing, my shape-shifting demon boyfriend and soulmate.

... I know how that sounds, but I’m not even kidding. Normally when i envision him he’s all skeleton, so his appearance is a surprise, but see also: shapeshifter. This is the personal part of the dream I was reluctant to talk about here at first, but I decided to just roll with it, so here it is.

Anyways, he takes my hand in his gloved one and I feel his skeletal fingers through the cloth. His presence is very warm and inviting. When he talks, because we do chat for a little bit, his voice is more nasal than I imagined, but no less masculine or handsome. He apologizes that it’s taken him so long to see me like this, and explains that he’s been busy fighting a war on the planes. I ask if I can see his soul, just for verification, and he frowns at that.

As he’s about to show me his soul and probably kiss me, Kevin bursts into the room. He’s carrying some kind of crazy sword and he’s absolutely furious to find me with another man. I get up and try to blast him, since I always have some crazy magic powers in all my dreams, but this time nothing happens. Kevin attacks with the sword and I get in the way. He stabs me through the arm and looks horrified, but I don’t feel any pain. I guess I was injured, but pain is just not registering. I ask Wing absently why I can’t use my abilities here, and he explains that I’m not actually on the astral plane anymore - This is some sort of safe zone between the astral and where he is, so I can visit but my abilities don’t work the same.

There’s some brief fighting between the guys and the sword is shattered in the midst of it, revealing this long blue teardrop-shaped bottle of liquid that was embedded in the base of the blade, which somehow survived without cracking. I grab it and, while Kevin is on the ground, throw it right at his face. It smashes open and poisons him, and he goes still.

Except, he’s not Kevin. He’s another demon, and apparently Wing’s brother?? Which doesn’t make much sense to me, but I roll with it. I feel like I can’t do anything, so I turn and tell Wing that I don’t want to kill his brother, and ask if he can heal him. Wing appreciates the request and magics him back to full health.

There’s some conversation between the three of us, and that apparently Wing’s brother (I never got a name, or if I did I don’t remember it at all) didn’t like me for various reasons and/or was contracted to get rid of me. Obviously that wasn’t going to happen now, as a temporary truce had been declared. At some point during the conversation my voice goes in a very specific manner, and I ask him “Am I speaking demon when that happens?” It was some kind of random curse. He tells me there’s a potion on the coffee table that’ll fix it and I find it and drink it eagerly. It tastes like blueberry lemonade, which is delicious, but I only drink enough of it to fix me up.

Wing’s brother leaves to give us some privacy, and we talk more about how to see each other more often. I ask if there’s any way either one of us can cross over into the other’s plane without the middleman safe zone he’s created, and his answer is uncertain, but mostly that it would be dangerous for either one of us. I tell him that I want to help him fight in the war, and he reassures me that he’d rather I say safe. He notices that I’m pregnant in this dream, and asks who it is, and I tell him honestly that I don’t know. I lament my not being able to use my powers and how weird it feels to not be able to do anything, and he chuckles good naturedly about it. He said to let him protect me for once, and I was just like ‘It’s not like me to not throw myself into the line of fire and you know that.’

Once we’re done catching up we start kissing, and then we totally boned XD

[sinrau]

Melvin Carter, the mayor of St. Paul, Minnesota, watched his city’s twin, Minneapolis, burn this spring. Sparked by the killing of George Floyd, many people gathered in protest and fury over his May 25 death and the treatment of Black people at the hands of police. Carter knew his city’s citizens were aggrieved not only by decades of mistreatment, but also by the entrenched poverty that accompanied it.

“We have people in our community who work 60 hours a week and still scrape by to feed their children and pay their rent,” said Carter. “Whole neighborhoods that are in deep poverty and doing the best they can.”

A month before Floyd’s death, Carter’s office had provided 1,265 families one-time payments of $1,000 through a temporary program called the Bridge Fund. The emergency relief diminished some hardships, but hasn’t been nearly enough. Carter wants a longer-term solution.

As the pandemic decimates the bank accounts of American families, some mayors across the country like Carter are proposing guaranteed income experiments, or universal basic income, as a simple, scalable and equitable solution for both families and local economies.

The March stimulus package, the Coronavirus Aid, Relief, and Economic Security (CARES) Act, they say, showed that giving direct cash to people works. The $1,200 checks from the federal government that many Americans received, the Paycheck Protection Program — which helped employers make their payroll — and the $600 weekly unemployment assistance payments kept many people afloat.

But that assistance was limited and weekly checks expired at the end of July. In their absence, these mayors believe the need for universal income has become more urgent and could help address racial disparities that COVID-19 has exacerbated.

Led by Mayor Michael Tubbs of Stockton, California, a coalition of 16 city leaders from across the country announced Mayors for Guaranteed Income in June, an initiative meant to show the merits of a monthly check. Los Angeles Mayor Eric Garcetti signed on, as did Atlanta Mayor Keisha Lance Bottoms, Seattle Mayor Jenny Durkan, Pittsburgh Mayor William Peduto and others.

Tubbs told NBC’s “TODAY” show in June that a guaranteed income is a step toward “abolishing poverty.” But the money, unlike a universal basic income, would only go to those in need, not to everyone regardless of wealth.

The city of Stockton has been piloting a program for around 18 months, providing $500 a month to 125 people. During the pandemic, about 45 percent of that money went to food, Tubbs said. Much of the rest went to providing other essentials for the family, like rent. While the mayors’ joint venture was in the works before the pandemic, they believe the pandemic and protests only strengthened their case.

Carter signed onto the new guaranteed income initiative in June, and says he believes it will help bridge the poverty gap permanently, by providing direct, monthly cash payments to residents of his city in need, every month. No strings attached.

Universal Basic Income is a centuries-old idea that has long been floated but rarely implemented. The premise is simple: Give people money and trust them to use it for their needs. It has, in recent years, been taken out of economics theory papers and put to work in experiments in Kenya, Finland, Canada, Namibia and Brazil.

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Critics have long worried aid recipients will spend lavishly, or use the money as an excuse not to work. For champions of a universal basic income, Finland’s pilot,which gave 2,000 unemployed residents a monthly check for two years, 2017 and 2018, failed in exactly this manner: Those who received basic income weren’t picking up jobs faster, and they only showed a small boost in mental well-being and perceived economic security when compared to the control group.

It wasn’t the impact advocates had hoped for, though experts say there were clear flaws in the program itself, i ncluding a rush to set it up, underfunding, diminishing other benefits to those who received the cash, and limiting the trial to those already unemployed.

Over the years, guaranteed income has been endorsed across the ideological spectrum for different reasons, with champions ranging from Martin Luther King, Jr. and the Black Panthers, to the conservative economist Milton Friedman to right-wing political scientist Charles Murray, though it has never truly captured the attention of lawmakers. Americans on the whole have not been particularly keen on the idea of a universal basic income, which is thought to run contrary to U.S. ideals of hard work and self-made worth.

Yet as inequality and the cost of living skyrocketed, it has started to draw the attention of the greater American public. When 2020 Democratic presidential candidate Andrew Yang, an entrepreneur, offered up a form of universal basic income as a central part of his plank during the primaries, Silicon Valley elites threw their support behind the idea, and Yang brought the concept to a wider audience, arguing it would bridge the gap as jobs continue to be automated away.

And then the pandemic hit, and with it the worst economic downturn since the Great Depression.

People who lost their jobs wait in line to file for unemployment following an outbreak of the coronavirus disease (COVID-19), at an Arkansas Workforce Center in Fayetteville, Ark., on April 6, 2020.Nick Oxford / Reuters file

“COVID-19 has shone a bright, hot light on our systemic failures,” said Mayor Libby Schaaf of Oakland, California. “Oakland has seen more than a doubling in homelessness, and I am terrified that once these eviction moratoriums expire, we will see a homelessness armageddon.”

Schaaf is another signatory of the Mayors for Guaranteed Income statement of principles. Her city was once thought of as the working-class sibling to San Francisco. In recent years Oakland has become unaffordable for many who’ve called it home for generations: Along with rising homelessness, gentrification is in overdrive, the poverty rate is creeping toward 20 percent, and a housing crisis looms ever larger. Schaaf says a guaranteed income is “powerful in its simplicity.”

Schaaf, who has also been criticized by activists for being too cozy with developers, acknowledged it is “not the end of the work,” saying issues like housing costs and fair wages still need to be addressed, but says she believes that, in the meantime, a guaranteed income could significantly help people in her city, especially as the pandemic persists.

The coalition of mayors also believes the universality of the idea is crucial to its success, and there are lessons to be learned from the CARES Act.

“CARES was a pretty important moment of recognition that direct financial support to people is a really essential tool,” said Dorian Warren, the president of Community Change, a Washington-based national organization that works to build power for low-income people of color. Still, a one-time payment sent to Americans under a certain income threshold cannot lift up a person or a family the way a monthly check would, Warren said. Noncitizens didn’t receive a check, and supplemental unemployment assistance was tied to lost pre-pandemic employment.

“Americans needed an income floor before the crisis, they clearly need one during the crisis, and they need one after the crisis,” Warren said, who has argued that universal basic income could function as something close to reparations for Black Americans.

Other post-mortems of the CARES act underscored the impact of unequal fund distribution. A Columbia University Center on Poverty and Social Policy study released in June showed that had the CARES act been equally distributed, it could have reduced poverty to pre-pandemic levels, but it left out many who needed it the most. Another study published by Accountable.US in July showed congressional districts with the highest Black populations received up to $13 billion less in Paycheck Protection Program funding than districts with the lowest percent of Black residents. Now, experts believe the government stimulus might actually widen already existing wealth gaps.

Warren said it’s precisely because of the failures of the CARES Act that the country needs help that is more universal, and inclusive. He pointed to Mayors for a Guaranteed Income as a possible way to get there.

Oakland’s Schaaf said a guaranteed income is “probably the most powerful antidote for racial disparities” that she could enact policy wise. “It all comes down to resources at the end of the day.”

Oakland Mayor Libby Schaaf gestures during a news conference in Oakland, Calif. on March 7, 2018.Ben Margot / AP file

But critics, even those on the left, are quick to say a guaranteed income isn’t a panacea, and comes with the potential to drain already scant government funds for existing social services.

Indivar Dutta-Gupta, co-executive director of the Center on Poverty and Equality at Georgetown Law, said cities don’t have the luxury of choosing between pre-existing social services and a guaranteed income.

“People need both a minimum income and high quality public goods and services,” he said in an email. “For any given need, such as having access to high quality early care and education or affording diapers for a baby, providing cash or the necessary good or service are not strong substitutes for each other.”

Some conservatives, however, support universal basic income precisely because they think America should choose between guaranteed income or a broader system of safety nets. Liberal critics often worry universal basic income will lead to the defunding of other programs, while other policymakers criticize the price tag of sending checks to tens of millions every month.

Others worry universal income might not actually reach those who need it the most, like youth who are homeless or housing insecure, said Maurice Gattis, an associate professor of social work at Virginia Commonwealth University. Gattis says prevention is crucial to solving poverty, and believes a housing and health care guarantee would do more to help than a check each month.

The federal government’s pandemic relief “exposed the gaps in our system,” he said. And there is no reason to believe monthly checks would necessarily fill that gap. To get the stimulus check as quick as possible, you needed to have a bank account. But that excludes those without a checking account, not to mention those without a permanent address for a check to even be mailed.

Carter, St. Paul’s mayor, understands the criticisms. He still feels the evidence points to the efficacy of guaranteed income.

“We are arguing for a route to a far more resilient and sustainable economy for the entire country,” he said. “Doing nothing is absolutely not an option.”

As the pandemic endures, mayors across the country call for guaranteed income #web #website #copied #toread #highlight #link #news #read #blog #wordpresspost #posts #breaking news# #Sinrau #Nothiah #Sinrau29 #read #wordpress

[ruthyempire]

Separate or Joint “Bank Accounts”? And what is your advice for this young mother??? Please read till the end. “I got pregnant nine years ago while dating my current husband and then the issue of marriage came up. I wasn’t working then. He told my family and I that he doesn’t want a court marriage for no reason. _ My parents tried talking to him, I cried and begged him severally to legalize his marriage with me but he stood his grounds not to wed me in a court. _ I involved his family members to help me beg him but they said, he’s old enough to make his decisions. _ He even refused to do a white wedding either because my church requested for a court certificate, so we ended up doing only traditional marriage. _ I later got tired and gave up on the matter. I was hurt and broken but I resolved to marry him like that just to save myself and my family the shame of having a baby outside wedlock. _ My dad was angry and disappointed in him but he didn’t care and because of that my dad vowed to see me a successful and independent woman with or without him. _ After I gave birth to my baby, my dad helped me secure a job with a multinational company and things started to turn around for me. I could now take care of myself and secure a future. _ Though I married my husband, but I never forgave him from my heart and it made me not to do anything in my husband’s name. _ We currently have three kids together but all my properties are in the name of my children. I never used him as my next of kin either. _ Just last month my company decided to transfer me to a branch in Texas and the company is willing to pay for my entire family to relocate with me. _ My husband’s business is not doing too well and he’s willing to relocate also but we have no legal certificate to show that we are married. Now he wants us to go to the court to legalize our marriage and I have said “No” My dad has threatened to disown me if I ever go with him to court. _ He’s been tagging me everywhere as a bad wife who is not loyal to her husband, spoiling my family also. His family members have been calling me trying to persuade me but I told them I’m old enough to make my decisions & I have stood my ground! https://www.instagram.com/p/CAvufusl2dt/?igshid=qi2o780pyh8h

[savetopnow]

2018-03-17 05 BUSINESS now

BUSINESS

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[topicprinter]

Hey - Pat from StarterStory.com here with another interview.Today's interview is with Carole Rains of Emu Joy, a brand that sells emu oil based skincare.Some stats:Product: Emu oil based skincare.Revenue/mo: $19,000Started: March 2014Location: New JerseyFounders: 1Employees: 1Hello! Who are you and what business did you start?Hi, I’m Carole Rains, the founder of Emu Joy. My product line features 100% natural products for skin, hair, muscles, and joints based on a unique ingredient: emu oil.Emu oil is a highly penetrating oil that’s full of moisturizing and anti-inflammatory benefits. It comes from a thick pad of fat on the back of the emu bird, which looks a bit like an ostrich. It’s useful for everyone from babies with diaper rash to grandmas with arthritis, as well as many other conditions for folks of all ages.Like many of you reading this, I had never heard of emu oil. Then one day while reading a home decor blog for my other business, Rustic Artistry, the blogger wrote an entire post about how much she loved emu oil, and how well it had worked for her eczema and joint pain. I was intrigued, so I started to investigate.After studying the research and reading everything I could find about emu oil, not only did I decide to use it myself, I also wanted more people to know about it so it could help them too. Seeing photos and reading about little babies with eczema sealed the deal for me. If there was a way to help them that their parents didn't know about, I wanted to get the word out.The result: I created Emu Joy as a source for reliable information and safe, natural products. I’ve now shipped more than 50,000 bottles, jars, and tubes of emu oil products, and the customer feedback makes me know starting this business was a good decision. Hearing from a mom who said “I got my little boy back” after the rash cream banished his eczema is what keeps me working hard to grow the business.What's your backstory and how did you come up with the idea?While the most common gender and age for ecommerce entrepreneurs seem to be males in their 30s, I started my business as a woman in her 50s.Leading up to that I had worked for 17 years in pharmaceutical advertising and marketing, followed by 17 years as a chef. Eventually, I wanted more flexibility of my time and decided to try out creating an online store.At the time there were a couple of resources that helped me get my store up and running. Steve Chou’s blog My Wife Quit Her Job was full of tutorials and extensive information on ecommerce.Andrew Youderian, founder of Ecommerce Fuel, had published an e-course on how to start an ecommerce business that laid out the process step by step, including things like opening a business bank account and credit card, getting an LLC, and setting up a website. Having a list of boxes to check off was exactly what I needed to turn the idea into a reality. I’ve been lucky to get to know those two in person and now see them several times a year at the ecommerce conferences that each of them hold.I bootstrapped the business with some savings that I had, putting $5,000 into my business checking account to get started. Since then I’ve been able to fund the business from revenue, with only a few times where I had to take a “loan” from my personal checking account for a few weeks to pay for inventory.Take us through the process of designing, prototyping, and manufacturing your first product.When choosing a supplier for my products I reviewed the online information on several emu farms in the US and spoke with the owners. It was important to me that my emu oil be certified by the American Emu Association so that I could ensure its purity and quality. My other criteria were that all the ingredients in the combination products be only natural.I found the supplier I wanted to work with based on the quality of the ingredients they used and the way they care for their emus, but they weren’t particularly interested, having had a bad experience in the past with private labeling for another seller. Just as I was about to sign a contract with my second choice supplier, the owner got in touch and said they’d decided to take a chance on me.Once that was established I brainstormed names for the brand and the individual products. I wrote the text for the labels myself, which was much harder than I had expected, knowing that I needed to get it just right before they were printed. I then worked with a graphic designer to have the logo and labels designed. Having worked for so many years in advertising I was very involved in suggesting and selecting fonts, adjusting spacing, and overall design, which was a lot of fun.Holding my first batch of finished products in my hands was one of the most exciting days of my life.Describe the process of launching the business.Emu Joy is my second online store, which I developed after learning the ropes through my first website, rusticartistry.com. That site sells custom furniture and home decor which can be quite expensive, so sales were sporadic. I wanted a business that would have daily sales and an emu oil line of products fit those criteria.Originally the business was called Emu Bliss, and the products were available only on Amazon so that I could test the market. When sales started to take off on that platform I added a Shopify site.I also applied for a trademark for Emu Bliss. Then the trouble came.My trademark application was opposed by a very large company called Bliss. They had a fancy NY law firm handling the filing against my Emu Bliss name, and very deep pockets, so there was no way I would be able to fight the case. Just when I had finally started to get some brand recognition I had to change my company name.That involved a getting a new logo, printing new labels, removing existing product from the Amazon warehouse and relabelling, and updating all the email campaigns, advertising, social media accounts, bank accounts, etc. Plus it was like having to change the name of your child when they’re two years old.Fortunately the new name of Emu Joy was well received by my customers, and in the end it didn’t hurt the business. But it certainly took up a lot of time that could have been spent moving the business forward.Since launch, what has worked to attract and retain customers?Emu Joy’s sales are more than 90% on Amazon. There’s a steep learning curve to sell on Amazon but once you get used to how the platform works it’s easy to make changes to listings, set up shipments to the warehouse and track sales.One of the most important parts of a successful listing is the images, and not just having a top notch main image. Smart sellers use additional images as mini ads, with lots of callouts, specs and other information that tells the product story. I found an excellent graphic designer through FreeeUp to create my informational images.Because I have my brand name trademarked I was able to enroll in Brand Registry. This entitles me to include Enhanced Brand Content, which allows for more images and content in the product description section instead of just all text, as well as the option to create a Store Page that’s like a complete brochure for the brand.Keyword research is critical in order to write effective listings and to use for PPC campaigns. It’s fascinating pull the reports and see the phrases people use to search for products on Amazon. There are a number of providers who have excellent software to manage Amazon PPC campaigns, especially PPC Scope and Sellics.Of course, selling on Amazon is both good and bad. It’s great to have a source for endless traffic, but it’s always dangerous to be dependent on one platform, especially one as challenging as Amazon. Even when you run your business ethically and play by all the rules, there are issues that come up on Amazon that are completely out of your control as a seller. I don’t know of a single Amazon seller that hasn’t had a product, or even their entire account, shut down by Amazon for something they didn’t do.I’d like to increase wholesale sales, and was happy to be approached by The Grommet, which is a shopping platform that features makers and small businesses with intriguing products. That starts soon, so hopefully, that will go well, and also drive customers to my own site.Another way I’ve grown my customer base is by looking for small, underserved niches that my products are good for. I have Google alerts set up for “emu oil” and often find articles that lead me to new uses. Some of the best information I get is by patient forums for specific conditions.This shows me the exact language patients use and problems they are experiencing. Based on this information I have made combinations of my products into kits that are targeted to these conditions, such as a Cancer Care Pack and a Soothe My Lichen Sclerosis Kit.I have information pages in the Learning Center section of the website to address various conditions such as piercing and tattoo aftercare, burns and eczema. Those have been successful at driving Google search traffic to my site.How are you doing today and what does the future look like?I’m proud to say that Emu Joy is a profitable business. After watching many episodes of The Profit on TV I know that that is often not the case. I attribute my tight control on my finances to the special system of allocating funds that I now use.Emu Joy’s finances are organized using multiple checking accounts based on the method laid out in the book Profit First. With this system all revenue comes into one account, then twice a month it gets distributed in percentages to accounts specifically for Inventory, Operating Expenses, Taxes, Owners Pay and Profit. Once a quarter I take out a portion of the deposits made into the Profit account and celebrate. The idea is that a business owner should be able to enjoy the fruits of their labor.My bookkeeper, Cyndi Thomas of Bookskeep, just published a new version of the book: Profit First for Ecommerce Sellers, which lays out all the steps specifically tailored to ecomm folks.Since implementing Profit First I have a much better grasp on where my business stands financially at any given time and am able to take advantage of seasonal bumps in sales.Through starting the business, have you learned anything particularly helpful or advantageous?I’ve learned that the key to a successful business is relationships. Whether it’s with my suppliers, customers, freelancers or fellow ecommerce entrepreneurs, developing a mutually beneficial relationship makes everything go more smoothly and efficiently, and makes going to work each day a pleasure.It’s OK if you don’t know what all those acronyms mean when you start. I was clueless about what PPC, CPC, SEO, LTV, ACOS and the rest of them stood for, but it’s possible to teach yourself about all of it, even if you don’t become an expert in every area.Mostly it’s important to believe in yourself. Having attended multiple Tony Robbins events, where I walked over 40 feet of glowing hot coals and climbed to the top of a 50-foot telephone pole before jumping off towards a trapeze (we were harnessed!), I know that I can do anything I set my mind to.When I hit a bump in the road I remind myself that literally every business experiences that, and sometimes the mistakes and setbacks are the greatest learning opportunities.What platform/tools do you use for your business?Emu Joy is hosted on Shopify using a custom theme that was developed by Smart Marketer, Ezra Firestone’s ecommerce training site.My landing pages are designed using Zipify app, also developed by Ezra’s team. Email marketing is done with Klaviyo which has excellent segmentation capabilities.What have been the most influential books, podcasts, or other resources?Without a doubt the most important resource for me is my membership in the Ecommerce Fuel private forum.These brilliant ecommerce entrepreneurs keep me up to date on the latest developments and are generous with their time and expertise whenever I have a question.My favorite podcasts are Danny McMillan’s Seller Sessions, and Mike Jackness and Dave Bryant’s Ecom Crew.Advice for other entrepreneurs who want to get started or are just starting out?It doesn’t matter what age you are when you start as long as you go in with an open mind and entrepreneurial spirit.Read blogs and books on starting an ecommerce business. Check out Facebook groups for beginner sellers to get an idea of the kinds of issues they experience.. Get on the email lists of the top marketers and attend their webinars.And remember that perfect is the enemy of done. You can fiddle with your website forever to make improvements but that first sale won’t happen unless you push go.Where can we go to learn more?emujoy.comcarole@emujoy.comIf you have any questions or comments, drop a comment below!Liked this text interview? Check out the full interview with photos, tools, books, and other data.Interested in sharing your own story? Send me a PM

[bigjoesound]

Naija Music Charts: Best 20 Nigerian Songs In 2017

Nigerian songs has continued to grow in leaps and bounce within Africa and outside. As normal a humongous amount of music has been dished out regular by both based music celebrities and upcoming artistes throughout the year.

With this informative article BBBUZZ would be considering the top 20 Nigerian tunes in 2017. We’ll be outlining some of the biggest Nigerian songs which rocked the tv airwaves and television screens in the year 2017.

Compiling the list was not any easy has some standards was put under account before collating what is the top 20 Nigerian tunes this season.

Here is our list of top 20 biggest tunes in Nigeria 2017.

IF – Davido

This is possibly the biggest song to have been produced in Nigeria this season. Thus far so great, David Adeleke much better known as Davido put a high standard this season by falling the epic tune ‘IF’ made by Tekno. ‘IF’ has garned countless songs covers by various artistes both local and international. Currently the movie of this song boast of over 50 million viewpoints on YouTube. This is actually the song in Nigeria.    

Come Closer – Wizkid

Nigeria’s greatest music export Wizkid lasted to cash in on his chemistry with Canadian rapper Drake. ‘Come Closer’ from Wizkid is ranked as the 2nd most prosperous song in Nigeria with much better international acclaim. Currently the movie of this song has over 48 million viewpoints about YouTube since its launch.

Fall – Davido

Davido makes the list again in the top 5 branch using his smash hit ‘Fall’. This is quite impressive since the DMW boss managed to pull in more than just one strong hit in 2017. ‘Money fall on you, banana fall you’ are popular on the road thanks to Davido. The video for ‘Fall’ is among the ideal movies on the market and it’s garnered over 33 countless viewership on YouTube which is much more striking.

All Over –

‘All Over’ by Tiwa Savage has clearly been all around the place. The African music diva owned the year as the launch of her only made by Mavin Records defeat manufacturer Baby Fresh. Again ‘ Over’ was sitting pretty high on music graphs on radio and TV in Nigeria.

Juice – Ycee

Tinny Entertainment rapper Ycee kept the flag flying high with his hit song suitably titled ‘Juice’. The song was not only a buzz trail in Nigeria but has been also doing good abroad. American music mogul Diddy played with the song by Ycee when marking his 48th anniversary. Singer and music manufacturer Maleek Berry did great with ‘Juice’ as a featured artiste.

Yawa – Tekno

TripleMG superstar Tekno was keeping up quite well as the artiste’s song ‘Yawa’ made it to the sixth place on the list. ‘Yawa’ is among the biggest tunes that rocked the airwaves in Nigeria. The song hit over a million viewpoints about YouTube in 48 hours because it fell.

WO!! – Olamide

‘WO’ is one is easily the number one club and dance record in Nigeria. Young Jonn made some mad beats and YBNL C-in-C Olamide lucky the trail with his vocals. The song went viral in 3 days after it’s launch. Countless dance/parody movies have been made with the song.

For Life – Runtown

Later ‘Mad Over You’,  one of Nigeria’s greatest pop superstar Runtown resurfaced with another banger titled ‘For Life’. The jam observes Runtown state his feelings to his love interest who he promises to love ‘For Life’. The raving ‘pon pon’ sound makes the song an immediate sensation.

Mama – Mayorkun

Headies Awards ‘Rookie of the Year’ 2016 Mayorkun continues his impressive run in 2017. The DMW music act impressed with his love amount ‘Mama’. Since its launch the song was performing quite well on radio and TV music charts.

Gaaga Shuffle – 2Baba

2Baba’s consistency is most likely one of the reasons he is highly regarded as a dwelling Nigerian music legend. The Hypertek boss never neglects to earn a good music launch each year. 2Baba did kill the ‘pon pon’ conquer ‘Gaaga Shuffle’. This is among the most played tunes in Naija.

Joromi – Simi

‘Joromi joromi that I would like you to adore…’, from the beginning of the song to the finish X3M music act Simi shone on the monitor. Her lyrics have been playful, tricky and sticky. Her vocals were all. ‘Joromi’ has been among the most played tunes across all Nigerian celebrities. A very lovely movie was taken to additional match the tune.

Yeba – Kiss Daniel

Former G-Worldwide artiste now Fly Boi Inc.. CEO hit the ground running again in 2017 using ‘Yeba’ after a successful album. ‘Yeba’ is an outstanding song with simple and groovy kind of lyrics. Kiss Daniel went with this but the outcome is a radio, club and marriage banger.

Easy (Jeje) – Reekado Banks

Mavin Records best Reekado Bankscame through with a marriage themed song ‘Easy (Jeje)’. The Altims generated beats was only good enough to get the Mavin music celebrity to ride on. This song is on a DJ’s playlist at Owambe and wedding celebrations. ‘Easy (Jeje)’ takes our thirteenth place.

Ma Lo – Tiwa Savage

Tiwa Savage makes another appearance on the list for her song ‘Ma Lo’. The trail featured Wizkid and has been set on the ‘SugarCane’ EP. ‘Ma Lo’ is dope and the movie is much more breathtaking since Tiwa Savage oozed some sexiness. This number readily makes among the best collaborations this season.

Yolo Yolo – Seyi Shay

One of Nigeria’s greatest female act Seyi Shay revealed she still got it into her with her 2017 debut song ‘Yolo Yolo’. The track which is a nice blend of highlife, afrobeat and salsa was created by DJ Coublon. Seyi Shay wowed on each level onto the track. ‘Yolo Yolo’ is our number 15.

Maradona – Niniola

Since her debut into the Nigerian music room Niniola has owned the Afro-house genre. As anticipated she brought her A game on ‘Maradona’ since the track was getting fantastic grip because its premiere.

Telli Individual – Timaya

Nigeria’s king of dancehall Timaya didn’t fail to develop in 2017. With the help of industry colleagues Phyno and Olamide the trio delivered a mad joint ‘Telli Individual’. The monitor is danceable and with witty lyrics.

Augment – Phyno

Now it is cool to see rappers like Phyno sing and make decent melody on their tunes. ”’ The Playmaker’ attempted to replicate the following song like ‘Fada Fada’. The attempt was adequate since ‘Augment’ which is highlife affected would make you forget everything and dance.

Living Things – 9ice

Alapomeji 9ice had among their most controversial monitor in this year ‘Living Things’ which is available to different interpretation. However, the song is a breeze regardless and a highly common club anthem. ‘Mofe Cha che’ is also a favorite street slang due to the song.

Jeje – Falz

Considering that the number 20 place is entertainer, actor and rapper Falz. The Bahd guy switched a piece by rocking the ‘pon pon’ sound with quite decent pubs. The song ‘Jeje’ is a fan favourite and had enjoyed massive airplay with several fans ready to sing through all the lyrics.

from big joe sound http://bigjoesound.com/naija-music-charts-best-20-nigerian-songs-in-2017/

[caredogstips]

Isabella Rossellini:’ There is no work between 45 and 60 – you’re in limbo’

At 43, Isabella Rossellini was sacked as the appearance of Lancme. Now, 20 years on, shes been rehired. She talks movies, her father, Ingrid Bergman, and her rollercoaster life

In 1996, when Isabella Rossellini was about to turn 44, she was sacked. After 14 years as the look and spokesperson of Lancme cosmetics, she was told in no uncertain terms that she was past it. Beauty advertising was about the reverie, executives told her , not the coarse actuality, and women dreamed about being young; the actors face would soon become an undesirable remember of the ageing process. And so, despite Rossellinis insistence that eternal youth was neither her daydream nor that of any woman she knew( she replies she told Lancme that the new reverie was to be independent, to be strong, to insist yourself ), she was replaced, preferably humiliatingly, by the very similar-looking Juliette Binoche dark whisker, pale skin, full cheeks, high-pitched cheekbones only 12 years her junior. Heartbroken at future prospects of losing her task, her central generator of income and two seconds family of colleagues, the mother of two expected a elderly executive what she was supposed to do next. He alleged, Rossellini withdraws, I am not your wet nurse.

It was pretty rough , without doubt, it was difficult to, she announces now, as we sit in a grand, flower-filled area at the site of the violation, Lancmes HQ in Paris, where, at 64, Isabella Rossellini is all smiles and once again the ace entertainment. My daughter was 10 and my son was one, and I was a single mum. I announced and was depressed, and I worried financially. As a fortysomething single father of two myself, I tell her I can well dream. What Im struggling to understand is how, when Lancme called her simply eight months ago to ask her to return to the bend, Rossellini didnt suggest they jostle their mascara up their derriere and construction it.

She is unfathomably magnanimous. There was that sense, when a sidekick wants to know why I was going back, she agrees. I said, Because Im flattered, Im exceedingly touched, I miss them. Its very personal, but I dont know whether Im being forgiving. Rossellini says the company from which she was expelled is now most varied. When I was here 20 years ago, the secretaries were women and the bosses were husbands. The manufacture was one of men forming commodities on the understanding that makeup was for seduction, she says. But I employ makeup on even if I go out with my sister there is a pleasure in the gesticulate. I was not understood.

Significantly, the labels CEO is now a woman, Franoise Lehmann, and it was she who obliged the most recent ask. Having propelled expeditions fronted by Penlope Cruz and Lupita Nyongo, she felt it was high time Lancme celebrated older age, more. As Rossellini justifies, Last year , Lancme turned 80, and we were thinking, what was life like for women 80 years ago? They couldnt vote or own their own apartment its stunning. We wanted to reflect the liberation of the status of women that has been so strong in our century.

Ingrid Bergman and Roberto Rossellini with Ingrid, Roberto Jr, Isabella and Renzo in 1953. Image: Rex

Having been born into scandal, Rossellini had ensure her “mothers ” drop-off contaminate of sexism and double touchstones. Ingrid Bergman met the administrator Roberto Rossellini on the make of Stromboli, fallen in love and contributed birth to his son while still married to her Swedish spouse, Petter Lindstrom the parent of Isabellas eldest sister, Pia. Despite a profession as an Oscar and Tony award-winning performer, and perhaps because of her likenes as a modest, elegant manifestation of womanhood( Bergman had just played Joan Of Arc ), her success was eclipsed by her adultery. In March 1950, in the wake of the circumstance and her precede wedlock to Rossellini, Bergman was denounced on the flooring of US Congress by Senator Edwin C Johnson as a atrocious lesson of womanhood and a potent force for cruelty; she was, he suggested, an debate that actors should undergo background checks before being employed to entertain Americans. Despite Johnsons belief that out of Ingrid Bergmans ashes will grow a better Hollywood, the proposed bill substantiated futile, but the arguing marred her vocation and family life. Bergman temporarily lost custody of Pia and retreated to the more forgiving European film industry. She and Rossellini later divorced, sharing joint detention of “their childrens”, Roberto Junior, four-year-old Isabella and her non-identical twin sister Ingrid( an academic who educates Italian literature ).

Bergman remarried, but Rossellinis childhood persisted involved. She and her siblings lived between New York, Paris and Rome, remain in hotels and accommodations with a nanny, her parents and step-parents taking it in turns to drop in and spend time with their seven collective juveniles, who were understandably close( Rossellinis trademark chipped tooth arose when her 12 -year-old brother hurled phone calls at her look. Bergman announced for three days, but Isabella decided to keep it ).

With her baby, Ingrid Bergman. Picture: Rex Shutterstock

Before contacting her teens, Rossellini spent six months bedridden and two years in a body cast to correct scoliosis, or curvature of the backbone. She had no intention of following her father into the film industry. I come from a generation of women where, though my mother was a far-famed actress and had a big career, we always presupposed in the family that she was gifted with a tremendous flair so she was an exception, a freak. The other women in their own families might work, they are likely not work but, the majority of members of all, you are a good baby and you marry.

She was, nonetheless, assessed to be financially self-sufficient from a young age. Her father-god, sarcastic of coin and commercialism, had died with merely $200 in his bank account, while Bergman had entrusted her own financial affairs to controllers and been repeatedly burnt. My mom never operated her fund. It was frightening for that generation. Women[ in their own families] ever gave it to the men to take care of. I did say to my mum that I was going to take control of my own fund. I had visualized what happened if you dont.

At 25, while working as a television reporter, Rossellini was sent to interview Martin Scorsese, who was promoting his cinema New York, New York. They hit it off, inaugurated dating and got married. The resulting revelation have all contributed to pattern presents, and very soon Rossellini was working with photographers such as Richard Avedon and Bruce Weber, and appearing on the report of Vogue,( much, she has said, to Scorseses hassle ).

With then husband Martin Scorsese in 1981 in New York. Photograph: Getty Images

Despite this relatively late start in modelling( I didnt know prototypes were 14, Rossellini once announced ), Lancmes contract made her the highest-paid simulation in “the worlds” when it came in 1982. In an sarcastic event of record repeating itself, the contract contained a decency rider( much like the contracts of the 1950 s Hollywood studio system ); this was soon quite scuppered when Rossellini became pregnant by a modelling colleague while segregated from, though still technically married to, Scorsese. Later, she would appear as a drag tycoon in Madonnas 1992 Sex volume, to the fear of Lancme, who worried that beings would think she was gay.

Given the pious moral imposed on her and her mom, I wonder if Rossellini ever reflects on how much weve changed. I have a feeling that its went worse, she articulates. My parents paid a bigger price, but the latter are unique. Nowadays, theres paparazzi everywhere. Its likewise the organised fame thought the red carpet has become a undertaking. Sometimes we insure the actors, and we know their reputations, but not necessarily the cinemas they were in. Its not exceedingly petitioning to me, because I dont been in love do red carpet. Its like a charm contender, and I think everyone appears awkward about it. A mas of performers are very shy parties. There are a few who love public attention, but theyre a minority; I guess performers like to act, and they like storytelling.

Rossellini has often said she opts pattern to action, which minimise her great aptitudes. She tells me simulating “ve given me” the confidence to act. Both my parents were very famous, so I was reluctant, but simulating gave me the be thought that I could dare. Her iconic act in Blue Velvet, as the bereft mother and lounge singer accepting shocking abuse at the mitts of Dennis Hoppers Frank Booth, prevailed her an Independent Spirit award in 1986. Director David Lynch originally missed Helen Mirren for the character, but Rossellini urged him to cause her a chance; the pair went on to become a duet for six years.

With Kyle MacLachlan in Blue Velvet. Photo: Rex

Wild At Heart, her next campaign with Lynch, won the 1990 Palme dOr at Cannes and, ironically, just a year before leaving Lancme molted starred in the critically acclaimed camp-fest Death Becomes Her, in which Rossellinis character sells the secret of eternal youth to desperate ageing housewives in Hollywood. I wonder if, given that role, and the sacking from Lancme soon afterwards, she herself became insecure about her advancing years?

Rossellini cheerfully contends she made a clear distinction between her professional and personal life: When youre young, there is so much pressure, because you work, you need money. As you grow older, the focus becomes clearer and clearer, if you like. Nothing ever talks about that, how wonderful it is to grow older. They ever talk about wrinkles, but ageing is interesting, wrinkles or no wrinkles.

Despite implicit pressings within the movie and beautiful industries, she has repelled reconstructive surgery( as someone with an acute radar for even discreet undertaking, Id stake my reputation on her illusion being wholly without involvement from either needle or knife ). In 2012, Rossellini took part in the documentary About Face: Supermodels Then And Now, and responded, Sometimes I wake up and think, Is this the new technology? Tells go and do the operation. But the majority of members of the time I wake up and think, Is this the new paws bind, is this the new road of being misogynist, is this a new way to tell women theyre ugly, is this a new channel of telling women they should be this and this? And you commit standards that are impossible to be reached, because the underlying problem is misogyny.

She is, she tells me , not interested in chasing perfection. When parties tell me, You seem so glamorous, you search sophisticated or stylish, its fantastic. But when people say, Youre beautiful, I find it a little deigning. Worse now, because they say, Youre still beautiful. In Italian, we say its a bayonet with both hems, because I know that they represent it to satisfy me, but its almost like alleging to a black lady, Youre not so light, you dont seem so pitch-black. I am old-time: this is what 65 looks like. She is irritated that her generation isnt better gratified for. There is no fashion for women my age, Im sorry to say. She tugs at her charming navy silk tunic. This, I designed myself, because its hopeless to find acts that arent for simply one form. It has to be scrawny, or it has to be sexy I dont just knowing that going on in fashion. I point out that sleeves are as easy to find as black orchids. Exactly! “There wasnt” sleeves. I crave sleeves! You cant find them.

I wonder if it isnt old age that Lancme and Hollywood couldnt deal with, but middle age. Geena Davis, Michelle Pfeiffer and Holly Hunter, all big stars in the 1990 s, struggled to get good employment opportunities in their 50 s. Rossellini agrees: My mum told me that there is no task for women between 45 and 60, because you are in-between. You are not young enough to play the young girl, but you are also not old-fashioned enough to play the matriarch, the voodoo or grandmother. So there is a period of 15 times where youre in limbo and they dont has been able to hire you. Then after 60, a great deal of work coming through. That was true for my mum. And you realize, Maggie Smith is the hottest happening on Earth. Helen Mirren is the hottest act on Earth. Then there is this gap.

Rossellini fell right into it. The movie characters thinned out and, while barely in the desert post-Lancme, she was forced to create her own opportunities. She launched a short-lived but very good cosmetics route, Manifesto, for women of all ages and skin colours. She wrote and performed speeches, made a documentary about her father, performed in plays off-Broadway and took on enjoyable activities like a cameo in Friends, as Rosss dream woman. She bought a small organic farm, investigated animal action and preservation, and studied guide bird-dogs, though she lately had to stop after some lead tugging justification her to drop-off and disable her back.

Guide hounds are labradors and golden retrievers, she excuses. I could have broken my back, so I imagined , no more teaching large-scale hounds! So what I do now is whelp and its fascinating. Like a pup doula? Exactly. They communicate me pregnant momma, they have the puppies, then I keep them for 2 month and distribute them to all the voluntaries for guidebook puppy training.

With her daughter, Elettra, in 1985. Photograph: Rex

She had been blithely withdrawing from showbusiness for a year when she was offered a part in Joy, the romantic humor starring Jennifer Lawrence and Robert De Niro, best friend of Scorsese, with whom Rossellini has remained close. She stopped cashing her actors trade union pension cheques, rejoined the workforce and, in the wake of Joys popularity, was offered a estimate gig on upcoming world TV demo Master Of Photography and a role in a drama.

She still oversees the farm. All the person or persons at “the farmers ” thought where I was, because I was hurtling again. For the moment, I try to manage it all, so well see how long it lasts, this burst of wield, she tells, taking nothing for granted. But she affection TV, and thinks it more attractive a hypothesi for full-grown females performers and onlookers alike. The conjecture I have is that the movies forming “the worlds largest” money are realize for young males, and thats why they are these large-scale war movies. Not because full-grown females dont like them, but because we have a family to create and so we work, “were about” babies, we cook, we are the caregivers and we have careers. So at night after dinner, we cant go out and watch cinemas. She detects television streaming on Netflix, Amazon and online boxed situateds please open brand-new and far more inclusive potentials. I think there will be a lot of actresses wreaking again, she smiles. Im doing a series announced Shut Eye, and first of all I never expected to be a leading role in something again. Im a contribute with other actors, but I am a extremely, very substantial proportion. Theres a whole new audience of ripen people who can watch 45 instants of television and then was sleeping. So its highly fragmented. We dont have these large-hearted phenomenon series where you have the entire country watching, but you have enough parties to establish numerous series, tell many stories.

I wonder if Rossellinis story, as the simulation, pastured middle-aged woman and then back again, is one she wishes she didnt have to tell, or so liberally forgive. She smiles. I feel that its a story and this is the last chapter. Its a glad ending.

Read more: www.theguardian.com

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Financial Dependence Is The Worst: Why Each Spouse Needs Their Own Bank Account

If you plan to get married, then you better plan not to get divorced. Otherwise, what’s the point? You’ll end up wasting money on lawyers. You’ll absolutely disrupt your finances. And if you have kids, they might have to go to therapy in order to make better sense of the cruel realities of the world.

According to a 2013 Kansas State University study of more than 4,500 couples, it found that arguments about money was by far the top predictor of divorce.

According to creditcards.com, approximately 7.2 million Americans (4.4 million men and 2.8 million women) have hidden a bank or credit card account from their live-in spouse or partner, the report found.

What’s going on? For one, if you are constantly feeling financially constraint, there’s no surprise that your relationship will suffer. Therefore, making enough money to live a comfortable lifestyle is important. Then getting 100% on the same page when it comes to spending and reaching financial targets is the obvious next step.

But even rich people go through breakups all the time. So clearly there’s something else going on after a couple starts earning a comfortable income as the hidden bank and credit card accounts survey indicates.

Welcome to the terrible world of financial dependence, where no matter how much your household earns, you’ll never feel free if you aren’t earning your own income. 

Why Every Spouse Should Have Their Own Bank Account

One of the best gifts you can give your spouse is the gift of financial independence. I’m not talking about showering your spouse with riches once you get married. I’m talking about supporting your spouse in making his or her own fortune in addition to contributing to the family fortune.

After all, financial independence by definition includes being financially independent from each other. Many of us remember the sheepish feeling of having to ask our parents for money growing up. The same feeling still exists as an adult without your own bank account.

Over the years, I’ve had over a hundred spouses tell me how they wish they had their own money to spend freely without fear of judgement from their spouses. Let me share three specific examples.

Husband of a heiress who lives in a mega mansion.

“Sam, the reason why I spend so much time trying to become a published author is because I want to make my own mark. Right now, I’m seen by strangers as just some chump who married into money. No matter how much I tell people I married for love, nobody will fully believe me. I want my own identity. I want to eat what I kill. I want to have the freedom to buy what I want without drawing from a pool of money my father-in law left us when he died. I don’t deserve it. Never in my wildest dreams would I have imagined a poor kid raised by a single mother would one day be asked to host political fundraisers at his home. I need to right the scale. “

Business school classmate who married a Google engineer back in 2007. 

“We live a comfortable life down in Menlo Park. Google’s stock is up more than 4X since we graduated back in 2006 and we feel financially secure. It’s wonderful being a full-time mother of two, but it’s exhausting as you’re now finding out. I had a great 10-year career working as a chemical engineer until we decided it was best for me to stay home. He made more and the family benefits at Google are amazing. But ever since I decided to be a SAHM in 2012, I miss the feeling of being able to make my own money and spend money on silly things without having to explain myself to my hubby.

Although we are a team, I’m always second guessing whether I should spend on even the simplest of indulgences. For example, when my back and hands were starting to kill me from having to rock my youngest to sleep for an hour each evening, all I wanted was to get an hour long massage. But instead of charging $120 on our joint credit card where he checks each line item, I decided to just spend $20 in cash on a chair massage at the mall because I was afraid he’d complain that he could easily give me a massage for free! I love my husband’s frugal ways, but his massages don’t come close to what professional hands can do.”

A reader shared one of the reasons why she got a divorce.

“We never made a lot of money, around $85,000 combined, or so I thought. He liked to handle the finances so I just let him do his thing. Then one day I found a pile of ATM withdrawal receipts stuffed in his coat pocket that totaled about $8,000 over the past three months. When I confronted him about the receipts, he admitted he had a separate account used for playing poker. He didn’t want me to worry, explaining to me poker was just a fun outlet.

It turns out he was actually a great poker player and had over $50,000 in the account! I was pretty proud of his success in the beginning, but then I realized he wasn’t always going to play poker during the nights he said he was. I won’t get into the details, but I strongly believe that if your partner isn’t completely honest about you about money, he’s probably hiding something else as well.”

Reason #1: The Release Valve

The common reason for each spouse wanting their own bank account is the desire for independence as all three examples demonstrate. There’s no greater feeling than being free to do whatever you want with your own money. Because it is impossible to 100% agree on every single aspect in life, having your own bank account provides a release valve when partners don’t completely see eye-to-eye on a particular expense so that pressure doesn’t build up to the point of explosion.

In the massage example, the husband couldn’t fully empathize why his wife would want to spend $120 + tip on a massage he thought he could provide for free. And because his wife doesn’t have a salary, she felt guilty spending $100 more than what she could get for a 25 minute chair massage at the mall.

Over time, resentment builds up by the wife, especially since taking care of two young children is way harder than going to work at Google for 10 hours a day. The husband, on the other hand, might disagree with her assessment and may begin to resent her for thinking this way given he’s purposefully shielded her from all the corporate BS he’s had to deal with.

Without a release valve, the chance for arguments and ultimately divorce increases.

Reason #2: The Insurance Policy

Having independence is just one reason why each spouse should have their own separate bank account. After all, before each partner met, each enjoyed independence for years. The other reason for having your own financial account is insurance.

Let’s say something bad were to happen to you and the legal system somehow ties up your assets in probate despite a clearly written will. Or perhaps your life insurance company decides not to pay out the claim you spent 15 years paying. Who knows what snafus await after an unfortunate event. They happen all the time.

If you have your own finances, you can more comfortably wait out the storm while the legal system makes you whole. In other words, your bank account is your worst case scenario. Knowing that my wife has her own healthy bank account let’s me die more peacefully knowing that at the very least, she’ll do just fine without me and our accumulated wealth and vice versa.

Related: How Much Life Insurance Do I Really Need?

Reason #3: The Financial Trainer

Just like how a workout buddy helps motivate you to do one more set or eat one less slice of pizza, your spouse can help motivate you to earn and save more as well.

By having separate financial accounts, you can clearly see where each of your finances stand. You can challenge each other to see who gets to a certain savings amount first. Or if your starting amounts are vastly different, you can challenge each other based on a percentage increase amount. The number of different challenges and the ways to get there are endless e.g. the many different types of side hustles and investments one can undertake to boost their income.

The ultimate goal is to push each other to achieve optimal finance performance while concurrently building a stronger financial life together. If you completely co-mingle your funds, it’s hard to tell exactly how much you’ve contributed to the household. The more murky your contribution, the easier it is to feel demotivated or be misinformed by how much you’ve contributed.

Keeping separate bank accounts also minimizes the temptation of “cheating” by overly relying on your spouse. Don’t take away your spouse’s sense of pride and accomplishment like the man in example #1.

The Horrors Of Having Separate Bank Accounts

I know by now a lot of you are completely befuddled with the idea of giving each spouse the gift of financial independence. I don’t blame you since for so long, the tradition has been for the husband to earn and the wife to stay at home. But it’s the year 2017 folks, modern up!

Believe in equality between men and women. Every little girl and boy growing up today should believe they can have a fantastic career and be financially independent on their own.

If you are financially independent, you can weather a breakup much easier. Don’t think divorce won’t ever happen to you since the statistics prove otherwise. If you are financially dependent on a person you no longer love, life won’t be easy.

But to recognize the other side, here are some aghast comments from my post, How To Overcome Money Addiction, when I wrote, “I borrowed $10,000 from my wife” to invest in an Austin, Texas real estate crowdfunding deal.

Aghast comment #1

“I will state flat out that I think everything should be shared and that I am a bit alarmed that you ‘borrowed $ from your wife’ although I don’t know your situation, I just want you to succeed, marriage and all, especially with all the baby talk on this blog as of late.”

Aghast comment #2

I hope you don’t take offense, as I have never looked into any surveys or studies on the subject, but I know several people whose marriages have ended and many of them kept separate accounts. It just seems like (to me) the two becoming one should mean everything!”

Aghast comment #3

“My wife and my finances are completely merged, so the concept of borrowing money from her is ridiculous!”

I have no problem with couples 100% mixing their finances together. I hope you have no problems with the way we’ve set up independent financial accounts and a joint account. But let me explain anyway why I used the term “borrowed.”

Since we first met, I’ve always wanted to give my wife everything I could conceivably offer. From paying off her college loans after my third year of work, to buying a house in San Francisco for both of us to live a more comfortable life while young, I’ve always had a desire to provide. Some might say these actions are the result of true love.

I owe her a lot because she has been with me since the beginning when we were broke college students. During my senior year while I was interviewing for jobs in NYC, she’d wake up at 5:30am just so she could call and make sure I wouldn’t oversleep for a 7am interview. We have a special relationship because money was never a deciding factor for why we came together. Further, I never want money to ever aversely affect our relationship.

I’m proud to say that she has never needed financial help from me. She enjoyed a fantastic 13 year career and was able to negotiate a severance in 2014 with some coaching by yours truly. She continued to work for two years after I negotiated my severance, even though she didn’t have to because she felt a great sense of accomplishment being her own financially independent woman. But after two years, I was too bored at home and wanted to spend more time with my best friend.

Because I care for her so much, I felt bad during my cash crunch to ask her for money to cover my investing addiction. I know we are life partners and share everything, but I just hate asking anybody for any money, especially someone I care about the most. Conversely, it’s easy to borrow money from a bank because you don’t nearly have the same relationship with an amorphous institution as you do your spouse.

We have separate bank accounts along with a joint bank account to provide maximum flexibility. We loved encouraging each other to save aggressively while we were both working. Now as business partners, we share profits evenly and always remind each other to mobilize our capital each month. We talk about all large financial decisions like buying a car or a house before doing anything, and for everything else, it doesn’t really matter.

The Stay At Home Spouse

So far I’ve addressed separate financial accounts between two working spouses. But how does a stay at home spouse expect to earn his or her own money if he or she doesn’t have a job? Well that’s easy. Being a stay at home parent is easily worth the median income of your city. And if you don’t believe so, then take the number of hours your stay at home spouse works and multiply it by the average hourly cost for daycare or a nanny. That is the amount of money he or she deserves to make.

Now take that monthly salary and subtract it from the day job working spouse’s salary, and that figure should be his or her income which can be spent however he or she chooses. Of course, it’s a good idea not to spend it all. The money should be allocated similarly to the way the day job working spouse’s money is allocated in terms of savings, investing, spending, and so forth.

If you believe in happiness, then you believe in financial independence for both spouses. And if you believe in financial independence, then you should not be opposed to each spouse having a separate bank account along with contributing to a joint account. The ultimate goal is to create household wealth together, while also ensuring each spouse never loses his or her freedom.

Happy Independence Day America!

Note: There is a poll embedded within this post, please visit the site to participate in this post's poll.

Readers, what are your thoughts about each spouse having their own bank account? If you are against financial independence, please explain. Don’t you think happier spouses result in happier marriages? What is the downside of having separate bank accounts plus a joint account?

Related:

The Average Net Worth For The Above Average Married Couple

Poor Little Rich Women (The New York Times)

from http://www.financialsamurai.com/financial-dependence-is-the-worst-why-each-spouse-needs-their-own-bank-account/