#and elizabeth is not at all ignorant of that - it's why she initially thinks he's too much of a great man to be interested in her

[anghraine]

Speaking of the social context of P&P and Austen in general, and also just literature of that era, I'm always interested in how things like precisely formulated hierarchies of precedence and tables of ranked social classes interact with the more complex and nuanced details of class-based status and consequence on a pragmatic day-to-day level. I remembered reading a social historian discussing the pragmatics of class wrt eighteenth-century English life many years ago and finally tracked down the source:

"In spite of the number of people who got their living from manufacture or trade, fundamentally it was a society in which the ownership of land alone conveyed social prestige and full political rights. ... The apex of this society was the nobility. In the eyes of the Law only members of the House of Lords, the peerage in the strictest use of the word, were a class apart, enjoying special privileges and composing one of the estates of the realm. Their families were commoners: even the eldest sons of peers could sit in the House of Commons. It was therefore in the social rather than in the legal sense of the word that English society was a class society. Before the law all English people except the peers were in theory equal. Legal concept and social practice were, however, very different. When men spoke of the nobility, they meant the sons and daughters, the brothers and sisters, the uncles and aunts and cousins of the peers. They were an extremely influential and wealthy group.

"The peers and their near relations almost monopolized high political office. From these great families came the wealthiest Church dignitaries, the higher ranks in the army and navy. Many of them found a career in law; some even did not disdain the money to be made in trade. What gave this class its particular importance in the political life of the day was the way in which it was organized on a basis of family and connection ... in eighteenth-century politics men rarely acted as isolated individuals. A man came into Parliament supported by his friends and relations who expected, in return for this support, that he would further their interests to the extent of his parliamentary influence.

"Next in both political and social importance came the gentry. Again it is not easy to define exactly who were covered by this term. The Law knew nothing of gentle birth but Society recognized it. Like the nobility this group too was as a class closely connected with land. Indeed, the border line between the two classes is at times almost impossible to define ... Often these men are described as the squirearchy, this term being used to cover the major landowning families in every county who were not connected by birth with the aristocracy. Between them and the local nobility there was often considerable jealousy. The country gentleman considered himself well qualified to manage the affairs of his county without aristocratic interference.

"...The next great layer in society is perhaps best described the contemporary term 'the Middling Sort'. As with all eighteenth-century groups it is difficult to draw a clear line of demarcation between them and their social superiors and inferiors. No economic line is possible, for a man with no pretensions to gentility might well be more prosperous than many a small squire. There was even on the fringe between the two classes some overlapping of activities ... The ambitious upstart who bought an estate and spent his income as a gentleman, might be either cold-shouldered by his better-born neighbours or treated by them with a certain contemptuous politeness. If however his daughters were presentable and well dowered, and if his sons received the education considered suitable for gentlemen, the next generation would see the obliteration of whatever distinction still remained. The solid mass of the middling sort had however no such aspirations, or considered them beyond their reach.

"...This term [the poor] was widely used to designate the great mass of the manual workers. Within their ranks differences of income and of outlook were as varied as those that characterized the middle class. Once again the line of demarcation is hard to draw..."

—Dorothy Marshall, Eighteenth Century England (29-34)

(There's plenty more interesting information in the full chapter, especially regarding "the poor," and the chapter itself is contracted from a lengthier version published earlier.)

[starsaroundsaturn]

why do we accept the way that men (and yes, women too) act towards their partners in the romantic genre?

in this post, I'll be discussing sarah j maas, colleen hoover, the pretty little liars franchise, twilight, the vampire diaries, and many more.

many of these I happened upon as a teenager. even as a teenager, I saw some of these as overdramatic and even problematic, but I could see the appeal.

the love interests, all men in these instances, were obsessed with their partners. they were distracted about them.

regardless of the novel, the protagonist can be the stand in for the reader--I am almost certainly not the only one who imagined myself fighting the white witch in Narnia, eating at the Redwall feasts with my companions, dancing with a special someone at a ball, or saving the world with the spy kids. protagonists are made to be relatable, to be appealing, to be somebody we'd love to be or at least like to listen to throughout the story.

and in these romances, the main character is super special. she is the obsession, the person who drives others distracted, she is so, so wonderful that the love interest cannot resist her.

we all want to be that kind of special. we all want to be seen and known and loved and admired. it's not just human, it's human instinct. we want to be accepted, we want to be loved, because that's family, and family means we survive. we need people.

so this is a really attractive premise. this person who we can see ourselves in--she or he is irresistible.

I think that's where we fell into this pit. he can't resist her. he wants her so much he loses control over himself.

it sounded super romantic.

till it didn't anymore.

she is so special and irresistible that he ignores it when she says no (hoover). he's lost control so much that he obsesses over her and watches her when she sleeps and stalks her, because he wants to be with her all the time (twilight). she's so special to him that she's his (soul)mate, and he can't help it if he acts possessively over her all the time and can't bear men looking at her, because she's just that important and irreplaceable (maas). she might be his student, but that doesn't mean they don't belong together! (pretty little liars).

yeah.

when you say it like that.

but the thing is, if you don't think about it too hard--like a smaller me might not have--it sounds exactly like the dream. it sounds like Mr Darcy falling in love with Elizabeth against his better judgement--but then, when she doesn't want him, he leaves her alone, takes the advice she gives, helps her family when it's needed because he wants to take accountability for his mistakes. only when she initiates does he tentatively bring up his interest in her again. when he's accepted, he's overjoyed, and grateful for her love for him.

huh. crazy.

the fact is, I think we've gotten to be so used to the idea that love is madness that we don't realize when it really is unstable, unhealthy--and awful.

we want people to do great things for us. we want demonstrations of love that often we've lacked in our lives. we want somebody to be willing to drop everything to help us and make it better when we're lost. we want a pair of solid arms around us (and I include myself, uninterested in romantic relationships, in that population). (there's a reason I'm obsessed with friendships and father figures and siblings).

we want passion and adventure and excitement.

and I think romance novels, and those who still romanticize these relationships, look in the wrong direction. they take the phrases madly in love and irresistible in the direction of unstable, passionate desperation rather than steadfast care and devotion.

I loved the phrase madly in love when I was a kid. not so much anymore.

[amberskywrites]

Eternal

Chapter 26 - The King's Protection

Chapter 1 | Chapter 25 | Chapter 27 || Masterpost | AO3 Link | FF.net Link

Fandom / Genre: Nanatsu no Taizai (Seven Deadly Sins) / Canon-Divergent and Hurt/Comfort

Pairings: Meliodas/Elizabeth, Zeldris/Gelda, Meliodas & Zeldris & Elizabeth & Gelda

Overall Story Warnings: Angst with a happy ending, Canon-typical violence, Canonical character death, Canon temporary character death, Cursed characters, Lmk if I need to add anything else!

Chapter Warnings: None, lmk if there’s anything I need to add!

Story Summary:

Eternal…

life.

reincarnation.

silence.

and chains.

For 3,000 long and painful years, these four have been doing all they can to lift their curses. They have failed, again and again and again. With only a sliver of hope left, they try once more.

-

Or, what if Zeldris accepted Meliodas’ offer to go with him 3,000 years ago?

The blast didn’t hit them.

The blast didn’t hit Diane, either.

The air stilled, with the blast colliding with something but not someone. Smoke billowed around just in front of him, but Zeldris could not touch the smoke, the black air swirling against a near invisible surface.

Said surface glimmered slightly, shimmering a faint green and turquoise, and the power settling around him and in his bones felt like climbing into bed with Gelda after a long evening in the kitchen, curling under the covers and drifting into a rare, easy sleep. Zeldris blinked and took a step back, but the power didn’t fade from over him, under his feet just as much as it was in front of him.

Looking up, the source was obvious, floating in the air and glaring down beyond the barrier as though looking upon a particularly disgusting and diseased rat. Hand outstretched, but reclined slightly, and wrist with no tension in it, as though creating the barrier had been nothing but a second thought.

The smoke settled beyond the barrier, revealing Guila, soot clinging to her armor and a clear pattern across her face where she blocked the residual blast that ended up being far closer than she anticipated. 

“Sloth Sin,” Guila said, her brows scrunching ever so slightly in possible annoyance, before smoothing over. “You dare betray the Holy Knights again?”

King ignores her, floating down enough to hover around Diane’s face, turning just enough to look at the injured giant without completely taking his eyes off Guila.

“Are you alright, Diane?” he asks, and Zeldris watches him take in the way Diane favors her forearm instead of sitting upright, the way her other hand lingers but does not yet press against her side, the fact that she has not gotten up yet, all he absorbs within moments, enough for his expression to darken even more.

Zeldris can hear the inhale he forces through a clenched jaw, immediately followed by a forced relaxation of his face, into something almost bored, impassive. The concern lingers, though, and always would where Diane was concerned if memory of ten years ago serves Zeldris correct, but it’s hidden enough that Guila will - hopefully - not be able to use it entirely against him.

“For now,” is the answer Diane gives, and it doesn’t appease King - doesn’t appease Zeldris, either, and he will help in checking her over once they’re out of here - but he accepts it, focusing back entirely on Guila.

“Diane’s not the only one hurt, ya’know!” Ban calls out, hauling himself up from some rubble.

King ignores him more intensely than he initially did Guila.

“I suppose with your betrayal, I’ll just have to end you as well,” Guila says over Ban. “Which is a shame - you would have made a great asset to our cause.”

King raises an unimpressed brow. “I think I’ve seen enough of your ‘cause’,” he says, “and you’ve done enough damage.” He drifts higher and back, and looks down at them all. King signs instead of speaking now.

“Hang back, and let me handle her?”

Zeldris looks to Gelda first, still recovering from the sudden fall - and his hearts hammer against his ribs, because why is she taking so long to recover? What did she realize up there? - and looking instead at Meliodas. She nods once, and he looks to Ban then Diane next, a longer silent conversation before he shrugs in feigned aloofness.

“All yours, King!”

Meliodas fell back to sit in front of Diane, followed by Ban taking post in front of her as well. Zeldris looked to Gelda once more, finally getting up. She stares at Guila for a long moment, and Zeldris can feel the others’ eyes on them, can feel King practically boring a hole into his skull, but he waits. Eventually Gelda returns his gaze, and she nods and steps back, away from the wall of King’s barrier. “Later,” she signs, “I’ll explain later.”

Only then does Zeldris move, following her back but keeping himself between her and Guila. Focus on King be damned, if it takes Gelda minutes to recover from something that she should have recovered from in seconds, he is not going to risk anything.

“You’re going to fight me all by yourself?” Guila tilts her head as she asks, and her voice, mostly keeping a bland tone, takes on the slightest of taunting. “Surely you’d want the aid of your fellow Sins, at least.”

King spares one last glance down at the rest of them, and that is the only warning they get before the barrier around them all dissolves, and instead Chastiefol’s spear form appears beside King.

“No. I can defeat you myself.”

-

Almost as soon as the words leave his mouth, Guila moves, faster than any Apprentice Holy Knight should be able to. King dodges the rapier easily and blocks the following blast with Chastiefol, forcing distance between himself and Guila.

The blast is strong, and King had ‘trained’ with Guila before, testing her abilities and her limits. Her power now feels too much like a Holy Knight’s, when not even two weeks ago they were half as much. But it is familiar all the same, the power she exudes. She jabs and sends explosions his way, over and over again, and it is an easy pattern to follow, once he learns it.

She creates distance, sends a distracting blast, then gets close. If he gets too close to her, she forces distance again and repeats.

King remembers she was calculating, before. Whatever happened to increase her power, to make it feel so much more overwhelming, she’s gotten too comfortable using the brute force of it. As King dodges yet another one of her patterned attacks, still not yet on the offensive, just learning, he can’t help but feel a little disappointed in her for seemingly abandoning her cleverness in favor of raw power.

It becomes almost a dance, with the way he dodges her attacks and she lunges after him. He stays in the air, but she utilizes the Necropolis’ crystal columns to leap from with each new attack.

The seconds tick by, and Guila’s attacks grow quicker, the pattern breaking ever so slightly as she tries to actually land a hit. And then a perfect opening -

Guila raises her rapier high, and King’s eyes are on her but he can feel the heat of the emerging explosions behind him, far enough they don’t instantly hit him but close enough that the moment she detonates them King knows he’d be hit hard. The power appearing is subtle, as she also creates an explosion at the tip of her blade, a distraction to the onslaught appearing behind him.

King snaps his fingers, and Chastiefol transforms just as Guila swings her rapier down, commanding the balls of fire down with it.

The explosion is deafening, even for King, but the thousands of daggers Chastiefol manifested into protect him well. And still, enough to spare -

Because Guila launches herself up, right into his space, but he’s prepared and defense is no longer necessary. Daggers block her attempt to stab him, and she’s forced to spin away, but still King sees she’s sliced by some of them. He brings more of the daggers close, and as one rains them down on Guila.

She runs and dodges the best she can, some of the daggers getting lodged within her armor despite her efforts. He pulls them all back once more and flies higher, ensuring there is distance still between him and Guila, and Chastiefol transforms once more into its spear form.

She’s breathing heavier, but not yet exhausted, and she keeps up with Chastiefol as King commands it with easy turns of his wrist. It forces her back further, though, clashing again and again with her rapier as she is forced to block strike after strike (he could break the rapier - could easily shatter it and stab right through Guila’s armor and truly make her a part of the Necropolis, or perhaps send her soul to Purgatory - but he cannot bring himself to do so, even knowing what she is supporting in Liones. Not with his captain watching, and knowing how he actually feels about killing their opponents; he could stand the aftermath of killing Ban, because the justification would be stronger, but there is no true justification to murdering Guila, not yet).

He lands a strong enough hit that it knocks Guila into a crystal pillar, and there is a loud crack and she doesn’t immediately get up. King finally takes his eyes off her, because as strong as she might be now all so suddenly, even she shouldn’t be able to recover that quickly. He looks instead to the others still on the ground, to Diane watching him with an encouraging smile; to Zeldris and Gelda each a moment away from jumping in still, always ready to back their plays even now, to Ban’s wounds closing, slower than they usually do - even King’s wounds did not last nearly so long, only one person’s ever took so long to heal, why… - and even to the princess and the pig, on the crystal wall behind Diane and out of range of the fight, so the captain would make no fuss about her being in danger again.

All he took in within moments, and just as it processed where everyone else was, did he feel the incoming heat of a gathering explosion behind him. He was not fast enough to whip around, and Chastiefol would take too long to transform again to protect him properly, but when he turned he saw-

The Captain, and the broken sword out, Full Countering Guila’s explosion. King was close enough to see, even through the flames, Guila’s eyes widen and the grimace as she braced for the impact she knew she couldn’t avoid. The explosion flung her back once more, further than before, and she crashed into the ground hard.

When Guila was knocked down this time, Zeldris was by her, his sword aimed to her neck just in case she got back up. 

She did not.

[b-lightwalker]

FNaF Movie Ramble

Long story short, I really like the movie, I really like Mike, Vanessa, and Abby, and I want them to be happy.

There be spoilers beyond this point.

I love the little found family that started forming between Vanessa with Mike and Abby. I know it hasn't gone anywhere yet, but we all know the signs. Please, Mr. Cawthon, let Vanessa take on an older sister/mother figure role like Mike.

I love how Mike has a roundabout way of talking when he's being emotional. He doesn't just say, "I love you," or, "Thank you," to Abby and Vanessa respectively, he rambles and goes on whole tangents about why he feels that way and it works. It works so good. And I am also talking about game Mike.

I love how William was handled. I was surprised he didn't get a lot of screen time, but it works. William is a behind-the-scenes guy. It's not until he comes on stage, front and center, that you realize what he's been doing this whole time. And the scenes he is in, he kinda steals the show. I didn't expect William to have an outburst near the end when the animatronics started turning on him, but of course he would. In his eyes, he made them better than they were ever going to be alive, and not even seconds ago, they considered him a friend. And the sheer confidence of this man to put the Spring Bonnie head back on while actively being spring locked is insane. (Anyone else think William may have forced Vanessa to learn how to treat wounds for whenever he had issues with the spring lock suit?)

William giving a young Vanessa the toys from his victims makes me wonder if game William did the same. Of course, when game William started killing, his kids were long since dead, but still. Imagine, Michael going into his siblings' rooms that aren't touched unless they're being cleaned, and he starts seeing these toys that don't belong to Elizabeth and Evan, but they look like toys they'd like. At first, Michael ignores it, thinking he just didn't notice it at first, even though he knows. He knows everything that's supposed to be in that room and he knows those toys aren't supposed to be there. Eventually, he asks William and he just says he bought them 'cause they reminded him of Ev and Liz. It doesn't 100% work for Mike, but it works enough, so he leaves it alone. After all, people celebrate a passed loved one's birthday, so why wouldn't they get gifts too? Even if they just stay in their old rooms. Then one day, Michael randomly gets a gift from William. I can't think of anything better, so let's just say a cassette tape for his Walkman. It's a tape that Michael would actually listen to, and it's relatively new, so Michael's confused why it's just the tape and no case, but since a gift means a good day, he doesn't question it. At least, not out loud anyway.

I wonder what happened to Aunt Jane. I know she was most likely killed by Golden Freddy, but there's a chance Mike brought her to the hospital and neither him or Abby are visiting 'cause neither of them like her. Imagine your niece and nephew visiting the hospital almost every day, but to see someone who is borderline a stranger to them and not you. I'm absolutely "making" a game counterpart to Aunt Jane, though. She's William's younger sister and she's almost as vile and manipulative. Just not keen on murder. Directly, anyway. Though in the games, she wouldn't have a trigger to want to get rid of someone like she does in the movie, but if she did have one, she'd be willing to kill. Maybe she could talk William into it. She still smells like cigarettes and is the reason the Afton kids hate the smell.

I initially thought Garrett was Abby's imaginary friend, but--save for the fact that it was essentially deconfirmed--it wouldn't make sense for Garrett to haunt his sister and not his brother who he would've known was kind of losing his mind from the trauma of his kidnapping. In any case, I'm currently going with the theory that Garrett is the Puppet and the one behind the "Come find me." message at the end of the credits. We'll see.

Since FNaF 2 is a prequel, I wonder if the FNaF 2 movie will also be a prequel. And if so, will Jeremiah be our protag? I know he was probably just a reference to Jeremy Fitzgerald and nothing more, but if he's not, then game Jeremiah and game Mike are work buddies. And if he is movie Jeremy Fitzgerald, I wonder if he wanted the dream theory book Mike has because he also had weird dreams while working at Freddy's. Maybe. Maybe not.

Tutorial Lady/VHS Lady/Kim and Phone Guy are totally married and their kids are Phone Dude and Tape Girl.

I know Mike being an Afton is basically impossible now, but if another twist is Mike and Vanessa are twins or related in some way, and Mike was given up while Vanessa was kept, I'd be 110% down. Then it'd be found family in the most literal sense. It doesn't 100% work, sure, but it'd be neat. (Imagine recognizing the son you gave up 'cause you recognized his last name 'cause you killed his brother.)

In any case, I really love this movie, and I want Mike, Vanessa, and Abby to be happy. Family dynamic, please, Mr. Cawthon.

[forever-fan]

New(ish) FNAF Au

Do you ever come up with a new AU and go "This is awesome! I can't believe I'm the first to think this up!" and then you do research and you aren't the first, or anywhere near the first to think it? Yeah, that happened to me.

So... yeah. This is a 'William was never the killer' AU. In fact, the actual murderer was Henry Emily. Well, I mean... sort of. He didn't kill Charlie, of course. Let's get into this.

Charlotte Emily was murdered by some random drunk from out of town. The man's wife had cheated on him and he got blackout drunk. After the initial murder, this man is no longer important and can be ignored. All you really need to know is he never confessed to what he did, so the mystery of Charlie's death became a cold case.

Henry Emily is pissed off that his daughter, his only family, is now dead. You see, Henry's wife left him after Sammy died in a car accident. The people driving the two cars were Mrs. Emily and someone who also died in the crash. Mrs. Emily divorced her husband and later confided in friends that she thought he was going to kill her. She also reveals that Henry is very mentally unstable.

Moving on, Henry decides to get revenge on the people who put his daughter outside. As it turns out, three boys locked Charlotte outside while two girls distracted people from what was happening. (La Missing Children) Henry is fucking pissed and is ready to pick off these kids one by one, but he pauses for a moment and thinks.

Henry isn't just gonna put on the Fredbear suit and murder kids, it would be obvious that it was him wearing the suit. (Also, the spring locks are unstable in Fredbear because Henry isn't as stuck up about maintenance as William is about SpringBonnie. This is the reason that Evan's tears triggered the jaws to clamp down a few months prior.)

Henry decides to wear William's spring lock suit. And so, the yellow rabbit lures five children to their deaths. These kids never realize that it was Henry instead of William. Therefore, the kids go all vengeful spirit on Afton.

Now, you may be wondering, "Why would Charlie help the missing kids possess robots and murder her dad?" Well, she also doesn't realize that William didn't kill her or the others. It was a dark, foggy, and rainy night. Charlie could only make out the man's heavy breathing, dark shirt, pale skin, and slurred cursing.

In fact! Charlie only started suspecting her murderer to be William after the Missing Children Incident. All the cops were saying William must have done it (despite lack of evidence) and her dad was saying he suspected William also killed her (despite the fact he was inside doing maintenance in the back, and the fact Henry had said nothing on that matter when initially asked by the cops the night his daughter died). So... yeah. Charlie is confused and upset.

Anyways, in this AU, the Funtimes were never meant to kill. What happened to Elizabeth was an accident and an actual malfunction. The compartment within the Funtimes was made as an earlier version of Glamrock Freddy's stomach storage. The claw was made so Baby could reach things a little farther away and pull them into her compartment. Baby counting the children was a safety feature to make sure no children went missing ever again.

William was distraught and broken when his daughter died. He felt like he was betrayed by practically everyone in his life. Henry called him a murderer, his wife left him (suicide), Michael accidentally ended Evan's life, and now his own creation had killed his daughter. Really, all he had left was Michael, and his relationship with his son had been strained since allegations of William being a murderer first started being tossed around.

Later on, after he realizes the animatronics are haunted, William tries to free the missing children from their metal prisons. Their angry spirits chase him into the back room, where he puts on the SpringBonnie outfit in an attempt to feel any comfort in that morbid moment. And then the final betrayal of William's life happens. The spring locks fail and William's creation kills him.

Michael goes along his journey through the games as normal, except in this world he is a pawn in Henry's sick game. After Michael is scooped and Ennard leaves, I personally like to think that the remnant begins to heal him. So, when we finally get to the fire and he is wearing a mask, it is so that none of the animatronics recognize him and get suspicious. It is not because he is a zombie boy.

Henry's speech is mostly BS because he is a psychopath. The part for Charlie is the only part that really holds any truth on how he feels. But yeah, Cassidy drags William into a personal hell because she is clueless and William is this AU's biggest scapegoat. We are going to completely ignore the canon of Help Wanted, Security Breach, and Ruin. None of that happened in this AU, except for the fact that some psycho dressed up in her fursona and started murdering kids at her job.

But yeah, that's my new goofy little AU. Except, a ton of other people thought of it first, just slightly different.

[bookshelf-dust]

the ones in red are always the prettiest.

gareth emerson x fem!henderson!reader.

word count: 4,215

warnings: swearing, pining, mentions of smoking, eddie playing matchmaker, the sweetest most disgustingly adorable fluff

a/n: i’m kind of in love with this, which doesn’t happen often. it felt easy to write too, if that makes sense. i hope you like it as much as i do!! <333

————

You don’t have friends. At least not really. Not anymore. You keep to yourself: go to class, study as best as you can, try and take care of yourself sometimes even. But you have got Dustin.

Dustin may be three years younger than you, but he’s remains your best friend. You tell him everything, and he knows you better than anyone. He is your one confidant.

Yeah, there may be some things that you don’t tell him, but he sort of knows, in a way. He’s always been smart as a whip. Like how lonely you are. How hard things can get. But he notices. Notices when you shy away from him, sink into yourself.

Yet he’s always there. Always. So when he started high school with you—his beginning, your ending—and found the Hellfire Club, it was like a dream come true. He’d found more kids like him to nerd out with, not that he didn’t nerd out with you, because he did. But he’d found his people. His own little group. And you were over the moon for him.

But that did take him away from you a bit. What with the initiations at the beginning of the year, new members and whatnot, the numerous and lengthy campaigns, Dustin simply making friends and having fun, you just didn’t see him as much. Didn’t have as much time to talk to him. But you were okay with that, because he was so happy.

————

Dustin was sitting at the Hellfire table, today sandwiched between Eddie and Lucas. You’d packed him a lunch this morning when you packed yours, because he’d said he was staying after school for a club meeting, and you wanted to make sure he had enough food, what with how late they could sometimes run.

The cafeteria food wasn’t always the best, and if he was going to be there extra long, he needed some snacks. Seeing Gareth and Mike sit down with trays full of whatever that was supposed to be, he was grateful for your gesture. Dustin dug around for the cookie he wanted, and snagged it, realizing you’d accidentally thrown two in there. So of course, being himself, he wanted to give it to you.

Dustin’s head shot up from where he’d been looking down, his eyes locating you sat at the table he’d been taken away from at the beginning of the year. Your neck was bent, nose buried in a book, and you were occasionally picking through your lunch pail. She needs this cookie, Dustin thought to himself. He hopped up, not thinking anything of it, ignoring the “Where’s he going?” and “Hey! You almost knocked my drink over!” that followed his change in seating.

You resisted the urge to flip your shit over the way Mr. Darcy was treating Elizabeth at the moment. Not that it was necessary, seeing as you'd read the book more than was healthy. Your page flipped with the gust of air that followed Dustin's aggressive flop as he sat down on the bench across from you. "How's Fitzwilliam today?"

"Prickish," you told him. "As al--" "As always," Dustin interrupted and finished for you. You grinned at him, closing the book, but keeping your thumb in to mark the page. "Need something, Dusty?"

He held out the cookie with both hands, bowing his head. "For you, my liege."

"Why, thank you kind sir." Dustin giggled at you, always willing to indulge him, and held his hand out for a high-five, which you reciprocated, before he scrambled back to his table.

"What was that all about?" Eddie inquired, shoving the last of a half-assed turkey sandwich in his mouth, wiping the crumbs on his knees before remembering that was where the holes in the denim were, making him steal Gareth's napkin. Gareth flipped him the bird.

"Just being a kind sibling. Figured she could use a nice gesture." Dustin adjusted the hat on his head. "I don't see how the two of you are related," Gareth started, "She's so quiet, and you're so—"

"Enthusiastic," Eddie finished.

"She's always been shy, but I think the quiet thing came after she got to high school."

"How's that?" Gareth popped the tab on his Dr. Pepper. "She had a pretty tight friend group in middle school, but they sort of grew apart. They got boyfriends, became cheerleaders, clones of one another. She didn't. She likes to read and doesn't give a shit about being popular—that's how we're related—and so I think the more independent she's become has made her eternally quiet. But she's kind of like us, actually, like when she gets excited about something. She's quite the nerd." Eddie smiled genuinely at Dustin, admiring the way he spoke about you, since most people didn't talk about their siblings like that. Mike certainly didn't.

Gareth glanced at you from where you finished off a bag of Ruffles, tipping the dregs into your mouth. Yeah, you were definitely related to Dustin. You dug around in your bookbag, pulling a red flannel on over your t-shirt. It was the same red as Gareth's vest. He pretended like that didn't affect him and went back to the Goldfish he'd gotten from the vending machine.

————

Dustin futzed with his hair in his bedroom mirror while you adjusted his makeshift 'X' belt buckle. He then tugged his hoodie down down, tucking the front into his yellow sweats to display the black emblem. "Here." You handed him his costume glasses.

You'd even sprayed a little blue in his hair for effect. He was the best Hank McCoy you'd ever seen. Dustin and his friend group had decided to go as assorted X-Men this Halloween, and the two of you had worked very hard on his costume. He'd begged you to join in, and you couldn't say no to him, so here you were with a huge white streak of hair on your head, attempting to be your very best Rogue.

You'd made your hair as big and curly as possible, and even spent a little extra on your temporary white hairspray so that it would last, a black headband pushed up your forehead to top it off. Your yellow top was tucked into green corduroy's, which matched the green bomber jacket you'd found at the thrift store. You'd dug out some worn in yellow converse, and Dustin had helped you make 'X' patches for your jacket and shirt.

Lucas and Max were supposed to be Scott and Jean, with Mike having chosen Sean Cassidy. You'd heard he'd been slaving over his Banshee 'wings.'

Some might think that all of you were too old for trick-or-treating, but none of you gave a shit. The plan was to hit the rich neighborhoods, traumatize tiny children, and then you were driving the group to Jeff's house for a Halloween party. Eddie had warned that if you didn't show up in costume, you weren't allowed in.

With a successful haul, you pulled into the driveway, nervous. "Are you sure it's okay for me to be here?" You looked at your brother in the passenger seat.

"Are you kidding? They invited you! They think it's cool that my sister likes Halloween as much as they do. You're gonna be great!" He smiled at you, adding an aggressive thumbs up for encouragement.

————

"Holy shit! You guys look great!" Jeff shouted as he opened the door, ushering all of you in. Jeff was covered in various makeshift nuts and bolts and stitches, opting for a very well albeit lazily crafted Frankenstein. When Eddie appeared, he was draped in a red and green sweater, and turning his cheek, he had some fake scar wax adorning the skin of his cheek. Although his knife fingers were only on his left hand as he waved at the lot of you. "Ladies first," he drawled.

"Thanks, Fred." You wandered into the kitchen in search of a drink as Dustin and his friends mingled. You didn't want to be the obnoxious older sister tonight, especially since he'd invited you to hang out with him and his friends.

You poured your drink, and were digging in the candy bowl when a voice interrupted you. "Wow, things must've really downhill with Xavier if Rogue is hangin' out with us." You looked up to find Gareth grinning at you.

You snorted. "I'm just here for the candy. Hank doesn't like to share." You let your eyes wander over his Dracula costume. His curls were extra defined tonight, and he'd clearly had the same idea as you, with a good bit of black spray weaved in with his natural brown. He was wearing all black under his cape, the red of the underside a stark contrast. Just looking at his cape, you could tell it was well-made and probably expensive. Given the boy, this probably wasn't the first time he'd used it.

He had rings on almost every finger, a dangly stake-like object hanging from one ear. But his fangs were the best part. They weren’t the plastic ones you bend and shove in your mouth, or comically oversized canines. They were small attachments on either of his own teeth, and were just big and sharp enough to be convincing. Honestly, he looked hot. You'd let him suck your blood.

Gareth laughed in response. It was hearty and sweet, and you hadn’t heard nearly enough of it. “Well, I like the costume. Looks good on you.” Oh shit. You were blushing now, weren’t you? You totally were.

“Thanks. I like yours too. The cape is very nice.” You popped a Dum-Dum into your mouth, and Gareth almost choked on his drink watching it move around in your mouth.

“Really? I’m glad you said so because I spent way too much money on it. I’ve been Dracula for the past like, four years, so I decided to at least make it look like I tried.”

“Well I think it’s very cute. It suits you,” you told him, popping candy in your pockets for later.

“Would you like to play a game? I think someone’s setting up Monopoly and you can see Eddie get mad when he loses.” Gareth grinned at you.

“Sure. I’d like that a lot.” He held out his hand, which you took, trying not to think about how nice the calluses felt against your skin, and lead you down to the basement, which you realized was where everyone else had gone off to.

��———

The Monopoly game ended up being much shorter than intended because Eddie got pissed that he was broke ten minutes in and flipped the board with a “I hate this shit!” and laugh.

You were now playing Guess-Who? with Gareth, Max sitting beside you and Dustin sitting beside him, both of whom were finding great joy in the shitty descriptions either of you offered—you trying to make them as vague as possible.

“Do they have red hair?” Gareth asked.

“I don’t know. Maybe more of a chestnut.” You grinned at him and he slapped his hand to his forehead.

“You’re an asshole,” he told you, smiling whilst he did so.

“Yes, they have red hair Mr. Emerson.” You watched him flick down a couple of panels, eyes lingering on his fingers for probably too long. You heard a cough, and turned your head to see Max smirking at you, and then you were blushing again. “Fuck off,” you whispered to her. She shook her head at you.

It was your turn again. “Hmm. Is it Andrew?” You looked up from your board at Gareth, who was already looking at you. He had a look of betrayal on his face. “Yes, Y/N. It’s fucking Andrew.” You clapped your hands in triumph, sitting up on your knees to give Max a high-five.

“You’re a pain in my ass, you know that?” He flicked down all of the panels on both of your boards, putting them back in the box. “‘S not my fault you suck at this game.” He scoffed playfully at you.

“What do I win?” You inquired.

“What do you think? Jack shit.” You rolled your eyes and pulled a 3 Musketeers out of your pocket and tossed it at Dustin. He caught it, thanking you, and then he and Max went off elsewhere.

“I don’t get any candy?”

“Get your own, Emerson.”

“No, I don’t think I will. What’ve you got in there, huh?” You stood, trying to fend off the candy thief.

“Nothing. I ate it all.” You continued to back up as he stood. Nothing about this was serious, though, considering the shit-eating grins on either of your faces.

He was on you in a second, gently pushing you onto the couch, tickling your sides to coerce your hands from your pockets. It worked, and you raised your hands in surrender, ready to give up your candy stash to him. He tickled you for just a minute longer, realizing he’d never heard you laugh like this before, realizing how much he liked it.

He gave up, searching your pockets, pulling free a handful of Kit-Kats and peanut butter cups. “Thanks, princess.” He tickled your side again and planted a kiss on your forehead before plopping down beside you and throwing a leg over yours.

Across the room, Eddie looked at Jeff. “You seein’ this?” Jeff nodded.

“I think our boy’s in deep,” Eddie told him, snubbing out his cigarette.

————

You pulled into the Hawkins High parking lot driving around to park outside of the doors where Dustin usually came out. You pressed the light on above your head so you could see your book, considering Dustin was always late no matter what time he told you to pick him up. A little while later, you heard the doors open, but didn’t look up, knowing he’d find his ride eventually.

Turns out, that was everyone else leaving. Gareth and Dustin had stayed to clean up, and when they finally got outside Dustin followed Gareth to his car so he could pick up some extra dice from him.

Gareth hopped in the driver’s seat, leaning over to open the glove box, but he decided to turn the car on first and let it warm up. And nothing. It wouldn’t start. Dustin asked him if it was something or other, but Gareth stopped him. “No, man. I know exactly what it is. The fuckin’ battery has been on its last leg forever. I guess tonight it decided to depart for good.” Gareth mumbled a “Shit,” under his breath as he grabbed the dice, but when he turned around, Dustin was gone.

The thud of hands on the window startled you and made you jump. Dustin yanked the door open. “Gareth’s car won’t start! You’re the only one left. Think we can give him a ride home?” By that point, the boy in question had made his way over looking for Dustin.

“Dude! Don’t just offer that up to her! She’s probably got shit to do.” He stopped in front of the two of you. “I’m sorry. You don’t have to. I can call Eddie or my mom or something.”

You shook your head. “No, it’s totally fine. I’m right here and there’s no reason for you to do that. I can take you home.”

“You sure?” You told him you were, and told Dustin he had to sit in the back, ignoring his protests.

It really wasn’t a problem, he only lived a little past you and Dustin, and it didn’t bother you to drive an extra five minutes. Not for him. You were about halfway there when Dustin exclaimed, “That son of a bitch! Piece of shit!” from the backseat.

“What?” You asked, confused, but used to his antics.

“We have to stop at Mike’s. He’s got my folder! The one with all the character sheets! I think my math homework is in there too. Can we please? It’s on the way!” It wasn’t. You’d have to take a detour.

Eventually, you stopped the car outside of the Wheeler’s, Dustin hopping out and barreling towards the door, leaving you and Gareth alone in the car. You’d never been properly alone with him before.

When you turned your head to look at him, he was already looking at you. He really had to stop doing that. You grinned at him and he grinned right back, eyes creasing, cheeks reddening.

“Okay, I’m gonna tell you this now before he gets back. You’re so pretty. So pretty. I’ve been thinkin’ about you since Halloween.” He started messing with the rips in his jeans, obviously nervous.

“You think that? That’s really sweet. I think you’re pretty too, Gareth.” His head jerked up to you.

“You think I’m pretty?” You nodded at him.

“Prettiest boy I’ve ever seen.” He leaned over the center console and smacked a sweet and noisy kiss on your forehead, then another on your cheek.

“Sorry. You deserved that.” You burst out laughing, finding it hard to believe he could feel this way about you, but deciding to welcome it anyhow.

The two of you just looked at each other for a few minutes, and he went to say something, just as Dustin burst back into the car. “Alright! Let’s blow this popsicle stand.”

————

Dustin was eating lunch a few days later when Eddie asked him, “Why don’t you invite your sister to sit with us? She hangs around enough, feels weird to have her sit alone.” He was kinda confused at the offer, even though it made sense. Dustin just guessed maybe you liked being alone during lunch, that you wouldn’t be able to concentrate on your book with them. But he took Eddie up on the offer, pattering over to you and presenting the situation at hand.

“Dustin, I’m not going to do that and interrupt you and your friends. You don’t need me in your life like that.” He quirked a brow, realizing that you thought he didn’t want you around like that.

“What? Come on, Y/N. I want you to sit with me and my friends. Let’s go. You can bring Mr. Bingley with you and everything.” He picked up your lunch box and book for you, leading the way.

When you made it to the designated Hellfire table, Eddie pulled out the seat between him and Gareth, bending at the waist. “M’lady.” You snorted and thanked him. Dustin set your lunch down in front of you and then your copy of Pride and Prejudice, fondly patting the cover, before plopping down across from you.

Eddie smirked at himself for getting you over here, having specifically chosen your seat. He was determined to help his boy out.

“What are we reading?” Eddie asked, leaning over to read the cover. He hummed in interest, but you were positive he was just humoring you. “Would you recommend it?” You laughed.

“Only if you’re willing to explore a period romance. But you might like it, you never know.” He grinned at you, smile lines appearing around his mouth. Eddie Munson was too charming for his own good.

“It’s actually pretty good,” the voice to your right said.

You turned to look at Gareth. “Don’t take this the wrong way, Gare, but why do you know that?” He laughed.

“My sister is fond of a bedtime story and wanted me to read it to her. But when I started she had all these questions and I couldn’t answer them, so we put it on pause and then I read it so she could have the full experience.” He shook his hands for emphasis. That was so sweet you felt like you could throw up.

“What?” He was looking at you and you were looking right back, but you realized you must’ve looked how you felt: practically fucking in love.

You straightened. “Nothing. That’s just kind of lovely?” His knee bumped yours under the table, his cheeks getting increasingly more rosy by the minute. You felt like reaching out and brushing your thumb along the spattering of freckles on his nose.

“Okay, now I’m feeling left out. Would you lend it to me?” Eddie asked you, feeling properly scandalized.

“Sure, Edward. You can have it in a few days. I’m almost done anyways, but I’ve read it a hundred times. If there are crumbs in the pages, no there aren’t.”

“I don’t mind. My copy of The Hobbit is missing half of the back cover.”

For the remainder of lunch, you gladly put Jane aside to indulge the boys in all their queries addressing the so-called interests you shared with Dustin.

“Daredevil? Really?” Gareth and you had started to slip into your own conversation, the rest of them arguing over some minuscule campaign detail.

“Yeah, you don’t like him?” You finished off a bag of grapes, offering Gareth your last two.

“No, no I do! Just guess I figured you’d like Captain America or Iron Man. Didn’t have you pegged as a sucker for vigilantes.”

“Oh, I do like Cap and Iron Man. Very much so. I guess I just like the color red.” You looked down at your hands, trying not to make eye contact with him following your attempt at a flirty comment.

Your nail picking was interrupted as Gareth’s hand slipped into yours. You’d been thinking about the warmth of his palm against your own since Halloween. The way his fingers rubbed over your knuckles. How reassuring it was to be in his grasp. You looked up at his gesture. “Is that so?” He squeezed your hand, moving your clasped fingers to rest on his thigh.

“Yeah. The ones in red are always the prettiest.”

————

The noise carrying down the hall was predictable, but starting to annoy you still. You were almost finished with your English essay, but you couldn’t concentrate. Not with the loud voice of the dungeon master or dice clattering or Dustin’s ear-piercing shrieks. You didn’t want to be a dick, but you were going to have to sneak out of your room.

You opened the door, following the sound. You took in the party and all it’s glory as you weaved around the table that had been put up in the living room. They were all too immersed in the game to notice you anyhow. You made it into the kitchen, opening the cabinet and reaching up to grab medicine for the headache you now had. You’d just downed the pills when you glanced over at the table again and met Gareth’s eyes. “You okay?” He mouthed.

You tapped your head in response, finishing the last of the water in your cup before setting it in the sink. You didn’t miss the way his eyes traveled down your bare legs as you escaped back to your room.

Safely back in your place of refuge, you grabbed your keys and slipped on shoes, deciding that maybe a milkshake would help you concentrate on the rest of your homework.

You made it down the hall again, walking to the door. Your hand was on the knob when a voice said, “Where do you think you’re going? You’re supposed to be babysitting me.”

You turned around to face Dustin, everyone’s eyes on you. “None of your business, dusty bun. There are plenty of people to babysit you here anyways.” You flipped him the bird when he rolled his eyes and hurried out the door.

Sitting in your room, milkshake—which you’d snuck back into the house—almost finished, there was a knock at the door. You knew it wasn’t Dustin because he’d never knocked a day in his life—only ever shouting before busting through an entrance. “Yeah?”

The door gently pushed open, and you saw his curls before you saw the rest of Gareth. “Am I interrupting?” You nodded your head. “Yeah, but it’s okay.”

You’d finished your essay and were now doing homework for your science class before you called it a night. Gareth wandered into your room, closing the door behind him. He leaned against the desk next to you. “Need something?”

“Just wanted to see if your head was okay. I know we get loud.” You laughed at him.

“It’s better now. Besides, I’m used to it. Just couldn’t concentrate.” His eyes met your milkshake cup, and he was suddenly aghast.

He looked at you, feigning betrayal, “You snuck out to get a milkshake? I’m hurt.” Shit, his eyes were so pretty. Too pretty.

“You contributed to the headache, Gare. You want to try some? There’s a little left.”

“Sure.” He said. You took another sip and then offered it to him, but he shook his head. “Not like that.”

And then he was leaning down to meet you, fingers lifting your chin. Gareth planted his lips on yours, grinning, obviously proud of himself. His lips were softer than you expected, assuming they’d be a bit like his hands, but either way they were gone much too fast.

“Pretty damn good milkshake.” You knew you were beet red, but you didn’t care. You stood, putting your hands on his cheeks and kissing him again, smiling the whole time. When you pulled away, you ran your thumb along the freckles on his nose, like you’d been wanting to.

“That’s what I was thinking too.”

————

please let me know if you liked this! feedback is always appreciated!! comments and reblogs mean more than you know. <33

[sdktrs12]

“Is somebody jealous?” For brio

Set in a vague post season four timeline -

Beth shuffles through the paperwork in front of her, pulling out the latest inventory sheet, pen at the ready as her eyes scan down the list. “There should be double what’s listed for number eleven and five should be split into two shipments.” Beth sighs as she makes the notations next to each number, hand coming up to adjust her glasses when they slip slightly down the slope of her nose. “Who the hell put this together?”  “You know who.” There’s a tinge of amusement laced into the answer and Beth bites her lip as she glares down at the paper, gaze involuntarily sliding to the bottom where a set of initials has been signed off.   “I thought we agreed that she wasn’t ready for this level of responsibility–”  “Riley’s good, it’s all good. You decided you wanted to keep your hands clean, so you ain’t gotta worry about who’s handling what now.”  “Well, when she’s clearly messing up something as simple as–”  “Elizabeth.” There’s much less amusement in this response and Beth glances up just in time to see Rio’s fingers come up to press into the bridge of his nose, the deep furrow to his eyebrows showing just how exasperated he is. “We’ve run through her system and it works. It’s all good. She knows what she’s doin’.” 

A sharp knot settles in her stomach as her cheeks flush and Beth shifts in her seat, her fingers once again finding the rim of her glasses, adjusting them even though it’s not needed this time.   “I’m just concerned. I don’t understand why she can’t just stick to the system that I–we had in place before. I left very thorough instructions. Why try to fix something that isn’t broken? And frankly, I’m not terribly impressed by what I’m seeing here.” Beth stabs the pen at the inventory list, a little harder than she intended, she realizes as she feels the paper give underneath the pen’s tip.   Rio huffs out a laugh as he leans forward, hands settled atop the counter as he laces his fingers loosely together. “Hol’ up. Is somebody jealous?”   The side of his mouth quirks up with the question and Beth feels her flush deepen as her lips part slightly, an indignant puff of air escaping as she rolls her eyes. “I am not–I can’t believe you would even suggest–all I’m saying is maybe this transition was a little rushed...” Beth flinches as she trails off, unable to control how fast the words stumble out of her mouth, the sharp knot in her stomach spreading to her chest. She tosses the pen down, reaching out to gather up the papers spread out before her, assembling them into a neat pile, ignoring the tiny hole now poked through the initials on the top sheet. “Maybe it would be best if I were to still personally oversee some of these areas until we can find a more suitable replacement. Now, if there isn’t anything else, I think we’re done here.”  Rio huffs out another laugh as he nods his head, sucking in his bottom lip when she reaches out to hand him the stack of papers. He takes them from her, fingertips gently brushing against her own, bottom lip releasing into a grin when he replies, “You got it, boss.” 

Thanks for sending love! 💕 [prompts.]

[midnight-in-town]

Elizabeth's family is one of the most influential, richest, and most powerful families in England. Why wouldn't she immediately report Undertaker to them so they would take the initiative and minimize the damage with their influence in the police department and the newspapers?Why doesn't she show her parents the courtesy to let them know the truth at least a day before everyone else?Have her parents chosen to ignore her emotional needs and allow her to deny her true identity and strength?

Listen Anon, on the one hand, I get that you might want to project a very realistic and 100% logical explanation onto the events of the Blue Sect arc, but the truth is... Kuroshitsuji isn't that kind of story so much. In fact, Yana-sensei often ignores the simplest way to rather craft up complicated plot twists, in order to explore tropes or character developments and to put her main duo at the center of everything. xDD

On the other hand, there is an in-universe explanation that answers your questions and I’m personally fine with it so far. To use your own words, Liz belongs to two very influential and powerful families: one is a chivalrous one but the other is...

...And Lizzie was raised with that duality all her life, taught to protect with her strength all of this family’s secrets.

Primarily now, she's "the Watchdog's fiancée" and I think her family understands (and actually expects of her) that she would make her fiancé (real!Ciel in this arc) a priority upon realizing the truth that he was back and not "in good health", because that is what was drilled in her head since being a little girl.

However, it doesn't mean that she wasn't feeling guilty about this (on top of her inner conflict about which twin to side with, the one she loves or the one she's supposed to be betrothed to?), as she tells Edward in ch144. 

In other words, she was lost and scared and she focused on protecting real!Ciel, rather than trying to do the “morally right” action, even if it bothered her because she knew UT and real!Ciel were up to no good.  I don’t blame her for that and I think that’s unfair that anyone would: she’s 14 years old and the authorities knew something very dangerous was happening and they took their time and had to rely on another kid (our!Ciel, the Watchdog) to figure it out. 

Blaming her is similar to blaming our!Ciel for never telling Soma he has a twin thus for indirectly causing Agni’s death because Soma didn’t figure out that the “Ciel” before him wasn’t his friend. It’s senseless and these kids have enough on their plate already. 

TL;DR I’m pretty sure her parents didn’t expect Lizzie to save England from UT’s crazy BD plans when themselves were worried sick about her disappearance but didn’t have any way of forcing her to come back (unlike Ed who, you know, went all out but indirectly caused more civilian deaths, oopsie). 

It’s a complicated family for sure, and Lizzie is currently in so much anguish that she definitely needs her mom’s guidance to figure her feelings out [x][x]. So blaming anyone for how things turned out is counter productive (unless you wanna blame UT), considering the giant scale of this damn long arc. 

My opinion. :) Have a good day!

[nervousladytraveler]

In Poldark, why could Ross never see the real devious character of Elizabeth, the deceitful, manipulative, cruel side of her character especially the way she played with his emotions, the way she used Francis and Morwenna. Also why could he not see that his obsession with her was causing so much pain to Demelza for years in their marriage. Why was an otherwise intelligent man so deluded and blind?

Hi @Anonymous and thanks for the ask. I’m going to guess that you have sent me this twice since this and one I got a few weeks ago are both very similar–hopefully one answer will suffice.

I haven't been ignoring you, just mulling it all over. And doing so has made me realize I need to re read the books, so I’m really going from memory and impression here and might be wrong on some things. 

Maybe the answer to these questions lies in human nature and in WG’s skillful writing?

Of course we all have multiple sides to ourselves, good and bad, and sometimes people who love us or even just like us, don’t see the bad or at least don't dwell on it (thank goodness). But it can also be frustrating when someone we are close to doesn't see the bad in someone else when we know it is there. Perhaps you have a friend who is friends with someone insufferable? It's hard to take, isn’t it? I think that was the case with Ross–he largely focused on Elizabeth’s positive characteristics (she had some but don’t ask me to enumerate). I also think post his initial infatuation with her, Ross was mostly taken in by Elizabeth when she was frail and needed assistance, as was the case after Francis died. Ross could never resist being the hero and that made him feel better about himself–and was an allure. And Demelza knew that about both of them, sharp little thing that she was.

As far as how this obsession/preoccupation caused Demelza pain, I’m not sure it did remain an obsession throughout their entire marriage. A concern for sure, but not an obsession after the May 9th event. I think Ross learned that he did things that caused Demelza pain and was more careful about what he said and did around her when it involved Elizabeth, though perhaps his efforts were not always successful. At least that is my recollection of how things transpired in the books.

So it comes down to skillful writing. Graham seems to know a lot about human nature (or at least human weaknesses) and his characters are complex in their motivations and therefore their relationships with one another are complex as well. 

And there is a lot about Elizabeth that we as readers are privy to that Ross isn’t. We can assume he was never aware how Elizabeth spoke ill of Demelza to Francis (she referred to Demelza as Ross’s “beggar girl”), and I’m not sure how much he knew about her involvement in pressuring Morwenna to marry or if he just put that to George (now I have to reread Black Moon & Four Swans to check this). Even though it is frustrating to us readers because we see Elizabeth for what she really is, this irony creates an interesting tension when she pops in and out of the frame. 

Lastly, I’m certainly no Elizabeth apologist, but I do wonder if the lion’s share of her deception–at least until 1795 or so–was to herself?

Anyway, I ramble...thanks for asking me. And I suppose if you were referring to the actions and motivations of Ross from the series, then I haven't addressed your question at all.

[richmond-rex]

I’m currently listening to Anne Boleyn: 500 Years of Lies by Hayley Nolan on Audible, and I’m trying hard to like it because it has really good information discrediting some of the beliefs surrounding Anne; but I have to admit that it’s grating me to hear the author stating that the Tudors were “usurpers” and that they were preventing a “more rightful heir” from gaining the throne. I almost screamed in frustration when she blamed H8’s sociopathy on Margaret Beaufort and especially Henry VII, using that one source claiming that H7 once tried to kill H8 in a fit of rage as firm evidence of a miserable childhood (ignoring all evidence stating otherwise); because of course having an overprotective parent (which is all H7 was) is going to cause you to grow up with no conscience. Also is it true that H8 was given absolutely no training in monarchy and came to the throne completely uneducated in that regard, I find that incredibly hard to believe regarding H7.

Hello! First of all, there's so much to unpack here. I think we have to go step by step. A big disclaimer is that I have not read Nolan’s book, so I’m only considering what you told me here. Secondly, I will not be addressing any claims against Margaret Beaufort because, frankly, what did that woman ever do be accused of that — the same Margaret Beaufort who 'of marvayllous gentyleness she was unto all folks' , and who 'unkind she would be unto no creature'? Are we talking about the same Margaret? We know one of her old servants, Henry Parker, was talking about his 'godly mistress the Lady Margaret’ to her great-granddaughter Mary well into the mid-1500s, and we know the time Margaret reprimanded a dean in Christ's College for beating one of his pupils (crying ‘gently, gently!’). I don’t see how she could be considered the origin of anyone’s sociopathy, but I also dislike the term — antisocial personality disorder is a medical condition and I doubt we could ever diagnose Henry VIII with that or anyone else who died five hundred years ago for that matter. The rest of my answer is under the cut! 

Well, now for the rest: I wouldn't say all of the Tudors were usurpers. Henry VII very much was one, as he did unseat England's king at the time of his invasion though that hardly makes him worse than other 15th-century English kings (as I've talked here, Henry IV was a usurper, Edward IV was a usurper, Richard III was a usurper — hell, William the Conqueror had been a usurper four centuries earlier). None of Henry VII's successors would have been usurpers, though (unless we should say every English king after William the Conqueror was a usurper, I guess?). Especially if you consider that they were also the natural successors of the Yorkist line via their descent from Edward IV's eldest daughter and heir, Elizabeth of York. I have no idea who Nolan could be referring to as the 'more rightful heir': the de la Poles, the descendants of Edward IV's sister? The Poles, the descendants of Edward IV's brother? Even if you go by Yorkist descent alone (which not everyone in England regarded as the most legitimate), who would have had a better claim in England than Henry VIII, the son of Edward IV's surviving heir and the son of England's most recent conqueror, Henry VII?

As for Henry VIII's miserable childhood, I don’t think there is evidence of that. We know Henry was well-educated; his father made sure to appoint tutors who taught him in the arts, classics, music, dancing, discourse, courtiership and theological disputation. We also know that Henry VII was personally involved with his sons' education, whilst his wife Elizabeth was involved with their daughters'. It is true that Henry VIII was not initially prepared for kingship but once his brother Arthur had died his father began preparing him for his future office. In July 1504 Prince Henry officially moved into his father's household where it seems Henry VII tutored him personally in some subjects. In August of that same year, the Duke of Estrada, a Spanish ambassador, wrote that 'Formerly the King did not like to take the Prince of Wales with him, in order not to interrupt his studies [...] But it is not only from love that the King takes the Prince with him; he wishes to improve him. Certainly there could be no better school in the world than the society of such a father as Henry VII. He is so wise and so attentive to everything; nothing escapes his attention'. So you can see that Henry VIII was assisted and had at least five years to prepare for the office of kingship, which is more than Henry VII himself ever had.

Lastly, it's clear that Henry VII loved his son. The same ambassador, Duke Estrada, also said in his dispatch: 'It is quite wonderful how much the King likes the Prince of Wales'. There are several entries in Henry VII's privy purse accounts describing items and stuff he bought to his younger son, always referring to him as 'My Lord Harry'. For all we know, Henry VII saw much more of his second son than he ever saw of Prince Arthur who lived in Ludlow, away from court. There is that anecdote about the time Henry VII knighted Prince Henry when he was only three years old: during the ceremony the king picked up his young son and placed him on a table for all to see — a gesture possibly made out of love, fondness, and/or delight in his youngest, though we can only speculate. Henry VII seems to have been determined not to expose his remaining son to danger in the same way that Arthur had been, and some of his more overprotective measures (like the setting of the Prince's apartments, accessible only by way of his own) can be understood as born out of paternal concern, all things considered. The rumours that the Calais garrison was not willing to crown Prince Henry in the event of his death were certainly of great concern to Henry VII.

To sum up, there is evidence that Henry VII did love and care for his son Henry. No doubt their relationship may have been strained at times thanks to Henry VII’s overprotective measures, but it’s also true the king let his son shine on many occasions in his place, denoting both affection and trust. Henry Pole's claim, made in 1538, that the king ‘had no affection nor fancy unto’ his heir should be seen in its proper context: one in which his brother, Reginal Pole, was involved in an ideological campaign against Henry VIII — the message was that not even Henry VIII's own father had loved him. I cannot say if Henry Pole actually said those words (anyone with more expertise please feel free to correct me) or if those were brought up as charges against him, but they do belong in the realm of (real or invented) seditious language. I tried to find the claim that Henry VII once tried to kill his son over a fit of rage in the dispatches sent by Fuensalida (allegedly the one who made that claim according to Hutchinson’s Young Henry), but the only thing I could find was something akin to court gossip, saying Henry VII treated everyone badly for a time (including his son) and spent three hours every night with his eyes closed but not sleeping...... which is?? 

(Here I should comment that Fuensalida not only disliked Henry VII but he was also several times denied access to the king and the Prince of Wales on account of what the English most likely considered to be his rude behaviour. He is also the one who said the Prince was kept closeted away like a girl, not realising that he was specifically denied access to the Prince — perhaps not without reason, seeing how Ferdinand had instructed him in winning the Prince over to their cause. Fuensalida was, of course, only serving the interests of his king, but his skills in diplomacy are somewhat unusual. Even Catherine of Aragon would later complain about Fuensalida’s behaviour). 

In any case, I cannot speak about Nolan’s book as I have not read it but I wouldn’t be surprised if the author makes some unsubstantiated claims, considering the book was not peer-reviewed. That’s exactly how many pop history books work and why it’s hard to hold them to high standards. I hope this answer is not a big rambling mess, but really there were so many things to address, I didn’t even know where to begin. Thanks for the ask, anon! 🌹x

[asherlockstudy]

Tap the nose

I was watching the first Pirates of the Caribbean the other day for the millionth time. There is a scene where the pirate duo Pintel and Ragetti storm in Elizabeth Swan’s house. Elizabeth hides inside a closet and the pirates are searching the room, knowing she must be hiding somewhere in there. Pintel demands that she comes out and promises they won’t hurt her while he rolls his eyes at Ragetti. Ragetti muffles a laugh and taps or rubs his nose in a signal.

After being initially startled, Ragetti understood Pintel’s meaningful look. He looks mischievous and secretive and he taps or draws his finger on his nose. It is a secret. Between them. They are going to attack Elizabeth but they will catch her off guard.

This was the first time I realised I have seen a similar gesture before and perhaps there is an ongoing symbolism that is associated with it. In the context of the POTC movie, it can mean only two things:

Oh we are lying to her

Oh we are keeping our true intentions a secret

Exactly because of the scene’s context the gesture means they are lying to her by keeping a critical secret from her.

But was this gesture created for the movie? No.

Yesterday I made the connection that the gesture is strikingly similar to the one Rhett repeated many times during their second Lie Detector Test.

Rhett tapped his nose on two separate occasions. The first one was when Link asked him whether he thinks they are authentic on GMM. Rhett answers a simple “yes” and then pointedly asks for the next question while he clearly draws his finger on his nose.

This is more like a draw. Regrettably to Rhett, Link draws the attention to the gesture and asks whether it meant he was lying. Rhett repeats the gesture many times, now clearly a tap, and claims its their signaling system that they established when they were children. He never answers what it means and then Link asks if there is something on his nose, in a weak attempt to help Rhett change his answer but they both miserably fail in this one. Rhett doesn't get Link's intention and thinks Link has forgotten. "This and this. You know what that means", he says and repeats the move one last time.

He probably adds a jaw touch in the end which I don't know what it could mean but his expressive face this time makes me lean on the probability that the gesture meant some sort of warning like "ALERT! stop talking". In the context of the video, perhaps Rhett has thoughts about their authenticity in the show. The detector didn't detect any lie there but maybe Rhett didn't agree with a question like that, which could easily expose him not believing they are authentic on the show. And lie detectors are not reliable anyway.

Rhett won't find peace in this video. His discomfort intensifies when Link asks him whether he thinks of him as a silver fox. There is a ton I could write about this moment but let's stick to the gesture, that makes another appearance.

The nose tap can't mean a yes or no. If it meant "yes", Rhett would not have used it after the "authenticity yes" because it would be pointless. On the other hand if it meant "no", he could straight up say he doesn't consider Link a silver fox and save himself from the uneasiness.

So we return to the recurring possibilities of "I'm lying", "this is meant to be a secret" and "Warning!" . Unlike the authenticity case, here the "I'm lying" option doesn't make much sense. I'm lying because I think you are entirely unattractive? Doesn't make sense for a comedian to hide that. I'm lying because I think you are HUGELY attractive? This could be the one, but still signaling this as a lie seems a bit excessive to me.

So, in this second case, "this is a secret, watch out" seems to be the best contender for me. After all why Link would ignore him and insist "just say it, just say it"?

So we have three instances (including the POTC one) where it seems this nose tap indicates that something is a secret and must not be revealed. If Ragetti uses a similar gesture, then Rhett and Link didn't make up their signaling system on their own but they were inspired by something. I did some research.

Where to begin with this? Everything except for the last fits. This is a secret. Don't bring it up. Watch out! This is dangerous. This is only between us.

In short, the gesture means that something is a secret that would be dangerous if revealed. More insight for the origins of the gesture can be read in this tumblr post. The gesture is likely Italian and it's interesting that Ragetti has an Italian sounding name.

Which means Rhett felt a lot was at stake if they revealed two things that are apparently true, 1) that they are not authentic on GMM and 2) that he thinks Link is very attractive and Link knows it.

In truth, I had landed on this conclusion as the only possible one before making all these connections and I doubt I am the only one. But when there's backup it's more justifiable to make a post.

[nordleuchten]

La Fayette in Prison - Part 4.2 - Adrienne in Paris

After six months the dreaded news came. Adrienne was to be transferred to Paris. Virginie wrote:

My mother arrived in Paris on the 19th of Prairial, the eve of the fete de l'Étre supréme, three days before the decree of the 22nd, which organized une terreur dans la Terreur. At that time, no less than sixty people were daily falling victims of the Revolutionary Tribunal. All seemed to forebode approaching death to my mother.

Her children were allowed to visit her one last time and her oldest daughter, Anastasie, argued and pleaded with the guards that she was old enough to be taken with her mother to Paris, that she was an adult and guilty of the same “crimes” as her mother. Anastasie was fifteen at this point in time and the guard refused her, although they were visibly touched by her plea.

Frestel, well aware of the imminent danger, wrote Morris in Paris and informed him about the situation. Morris lost no time and immediately demanded Robespierre himself to release Adrienne - he was ignored. Morris had previously been quite open about this dislike for the revolution and was therefore not really welcomed. He however made it very, very, very clear, that the Americans were quite attached to La Fayette and his whole family and that if, should anything happen to Adrienne or the children, this could quite possible be the final straw for the Americans. He said, and I paraphrase here, Morris himself was a tad more diplomatic, “Our rebellion against England started with a trade boycott. America is one of the last countries that still trades with France. The American government is and will remain neutral, but if something were to happen to Adrienne or her children and the American people start boycotting French goods, well, what is the government supposed to do?” After that, Morris was even more hated by the Jacobins but his initiative proofed to be successful. Adrienne remained in prison but it was made clear that she should not be executed. Americas neutrality was nothing that France could afford to lose.

Frestel had furthermore collected all the jewellery that still reminded in Chavaniac and sold most of it, so that Adrienne would have money while in prison. A number of the servants even gave some of their own money to Adrienne (have I mentioned how great and loyal and amazing the servants were?).

Adriennes mother, the duchess d’Ayen, her sister, the vicomtesse de Noailles and her grandmother, the duchess de Noailles were all executed early in July of 1794. Her mother and sister had fled to safety in Switzerland but decided to return to France to nurse Adrienne’s dying grandfather. After his death, the three women were arrested. Virginie wrote concerning their arrests:

My grand mother and my aunt de Noailles, who had remained along time at Saint - Germain, to take care of the Maréchal de Noailles in his old age, returned to Paris  after his death, anxious to attend once more to their religious duties. They were, soon after their return, put under arrest in their own house, at the Hôtel de Noailles. The danger of their situation filled my mother's mind with terror and absorbed all her thoughts.

They died on the same day. Their local priest was able to get close enough to them to give them the absolution. He later noted that the two duchesses at least were content with their fate because they would both die before their child. On the day of the execution, the duchess de Noailles was the first to be guillotined, followed by her daughter, the duchess d’Ayen who in her turn was followed by her daughter, the vicomtesse de Noailles. A parent should not outlive their child.

I can not imagine what Adrienne must have felt as she received the news. All her live she had been extremely close with her mother and her older sister Louise. She furthermore could never be completely certain that she were not to follow her family members to the guillotine. Her American connections kept her safe for the time being, but that could change quickly.

The downfall of Robespierre and the Committee of Public Safety was Adrienne’s salvation. More moderate forces took over the reign of government and less and less people were executed. Adrienne however was still in prison - and she did not know why. James Monroe, a close and dear friend of La Fayette had just taken over as ambassador from Morris and getting Adrienne out of prison was one of his top priorities. He could not risk a diplomatic misstep in his affair and he therefor did something very clever - he asked his wife Elizabeth Monroe if she would like to visit Adrienne. Elizabeth naturally agreed and soon the Monroe couple visited Adrienne on a regular basis and brought her all sorts of things she might need in prison. Their visits served two purposes (beside cheering poor Adrienne up). They made it clear that America was still very invested in the wellbeing of Adrienne and her family. They also kept Adrienne in the spotlight because it almost seemed as if the new government had simply forgotten that she was still imprisoned - and still without any reasonable charges. Adrienne wrote Monroe on October 3, 1794:

It is likely that I will be the last to leave this place. I believe that the threat of execution is subsiding and if hope persists, there is no danger for me, as I have not the least reason to be held. But the situation of my children so far away from me adds to the sorrow that will follow me to my grave. These cruel anxieties and this kind of torment not being completely without remedy, I beg you to ease my cares by allowing me a moment of conversation with a man who should have your full confidence. Nothing is easier than what I am asking you, and I cannot believe that you would refuse me. (…)I truly need you to look after the interest of my dear children from whom I have been torn apart. It isn’t too much I think after a two-month confinement in the same place, to ask for the consoling confirmation that I have some right to hope for my liberation at the moment of their arrival. You see, my dear sir, that I assume no pride in this because I sense that you have already enough assurances of my appreciation that I am ready for you to undertake new responsibilities. But, I am accustomed to remaining silent when I am not allowed to express openly what I feel. Pardon the candor with which I express myself to you; and doubt not that not only what the United States and its minister has done for me, but what they have willingly attempted to do for me, has instilled in me a very sincere appreciation.

There are many letters between Monroe and Adrienne, a few letters between Adrienne and Washington and only one letter between Adrienne and La Fayette (that I know of). Monroe did not only aided Adrienne in obtaining her release but he also helped her further with her finances and to take care of several relatives and former employees. Here is just one of the many, many examples. Adrienne wrote to Monroe in an undated letter (in all likelihood November 1794):

I cannot finish without recommending again to the kindnesses of the American minister, Mr Mercier, a servant who has served me for seventeen years with fidelity and zeal, and who has also run risks for me and shared with me a month in prison. He has a position at this moment, but I cannot bear the idea that he would suffer poverty. And I need to hope that he will not be abandoned by the United States. A very poor family whose son is the victim with my husband also has sacred claims to their kindness, the father, the mother and five children will be furnished of what aid that will relieve them.

Adrienne was not in a great position herself, but she constantly thought of others.

After a grand total of sixteen months in prison, Adrienne was finally released. Her immediate aim was to get her son and his tutor Frestel to the safe shores of America. She first re-purchased Chavaniac from the government so that Louise Charlotte and her children had a safe place to stay. She also argued with the government that she was eligible to inherit her mother’s properties - they eventually agreed with her. Monroe in the meantime had “found” an American passport for Georges. (Let me know if you all are interested in a separate post about Georges time and reception in America).

Adrienne and her daughters travelled to Austria, there to argue for La Fayette’s release - and that is exactly where we continue next time, with La Fayette’s stay in the infamous Olmütz prison.

[anextraordinarymuse]

Waiting for your thoughts on last night's WCTH. Still not over that opening scene.

NONNIE. THAT OPENING SCENE. 

I feel like I was blessed and assassinated all at once. Like ... *le sigh* Do I even have any thoughts after that? I’ll try to string some together. This is so long ... are they ever not at this point?

Everything about that opening scene is absolutely fantastic. Playful, silly Nathan? Please me with more of this for the rest of forever. This is what we’ve been missing this season: the fun, the levity, the cute little moments of flirting and happiness. This moment was so fun and lighthearted. It was entertaining to see Elizabeth kind of put her foot in her mouth and be awkward for once although who can blame her for telling Nathan to undress because, same, girl. We’re so used to seeing Nathan like this that it’s fun to see the tables turned for a minute. More than that, though, this moment feels like a return to the Elizabeth we’ve known for so many years. She notes that Nathan is cold and instead of ignoring it, she immediately offers relief. There’s also a naturalness to Elizabeth, and Nathan, and their interaction in this scene. Elizabeth doesn’t seem nervous about offering Nathan something hot to drink, or a pair of Jack’s gloves if she has them, or even offering to warm up his serge. She’s nervous about her little Freudian slip of telling him to take off his serge, but only after it occurs to her how it sounds because Nathan’s reaction is so taken aback. Then, when she asks Nathan about the bouquet and he tells her he forgot to give it to her - this moment is so reminiscent of a husband telling his wife he forgot to do something. Even the way Elizabeth looks at him and then chuckles when he sheepishly answers her question is so ... intimate. It’s just the cutest damn thing.

Now, I’ve seen a lot of different reactions to this scene. One that caught me off guard is that some people are upset that Elizabeth mentions Jack here. “I used to do this for Jack on chilly mornings.” People seem to be upset that Elizabeth mentions Jack in this moment, and saying that this is an indicator that Elizabeth will always equate Nathan to Jack, or that the two men occupy the same place in her mind and heart ... and I have no idea where they’re getting that. I don’t feel that way at all. I had the opposite reaction. When Elizabeth made that remark, I thought to myself: this is what she’s missing with Lucas. She never mentions Jack to Lucas, or talks about her past, or anything like that. Elizabeth is comfortable with Nathan; she’s secure in their bond and their relationship, even though both of those things have taken a hell of a beating this season. And Nathan isn’t upset by the comment at all: he looks peaceful, and touched by the thought of it. Watch the little snort/chuckle he gives as he watches her. Elizabeth is sharing something of herself in that moment. It’s not huge, it’s not a crazy admission or even an overtly emotional moment. Just something quiet and honest. Also, expecting Elizabeth to just never mention Jack again is neither realistic or healthy. 

Her mention of Jack doesn’t disrupt the moment or their comfort/peace with another at all. You know what does? A rather subtle mention of Lucas. When Nathan says “I guess she thought that you were the next to be married” there’s a hidden gravity to it because Nathan is making a veiled reference to her relationship with Lucas. At this point, Elizabeth and Lucas have been courting for a few months, so if Florence thinks that Elizabeth is the next one to get married the natural assumption is that things with Elizabeth and Lucas are further along than we (or Nathan) think they are. It's this reference to the (uncertain) future that breaks the moment, not Elizabeth's mention of Jack.

Everything in this scene comes naturally to Elizabeth. She's acting by instinct. The way she helps Nathan into his serge isn't remotely forced, and neither is the way she runs her hands over his back to smooth it down, or grabs his lapels and begins to help him put the serge back on. This is part of what makes this moment feel so intimate: this is a glimpse into the future. It feels like we're looking in on a moment between a wife helping her husband prepare for his day. You know what else I found striking about this moment though? Elizabeth and Lucas have been dating all season, yet Elizabeth isn't comfortable with and doesn't really allow/invite much physical contact. We have repeatedly been shown that she struggles with that. Lucas wants to touch her; he wants her to be comfortable touching him. But that never happens. The few times Elizabeth does allow that physical contact it feels ... maybe not forced, but deliberate. Like she's making a conscious effort to let it happen and be okay with it. It's not natural, it's not a compulsion. In fact, when it comes to Lucas Elizabeth's instinct is not to let him touch her - to withdraw. We have a great example of that in this episode, when Lucas is at the schoolhouse and goes to help her hang the banner and Elizabeth immediately withdraws from him. They hardly touch at all in that moment; Elizabeth immediately pulls away the arm of hers that is closest to him and then walks away without even so much as a brush against him as she passes.

This is the first scene that Elizabeth and Lucas share in this episode. Timeline wise, we can also reasonably assume that this moment comes not long after the moment she shares with Nathan in her house. It's an interesting juxtaposition: Elizabeth can't seem to keep herself from touching Nathan. She does it without thought or hesitation - in fact, it takes conscious thought to stop herself. But the opposite is true with Lucas: her natural inclination is to keep her distance with him, and it takes conscious thought to allow or initiate contact with him. Elizabeth's actions and instincts give her away. Her heart belongs to someone else, and she's instinctively trying to preserve the sanctity of that bond and that relationship (as in, you don't let someone else hold your hand or be in your physical space when you're in a relationship with someone else). The roles should be flipped - Elizabeth should be withdrawing from Nathan and any opportunity for closeness with him, physical or emotional, and seeking them out with Lucas - but she isn't. She says she's in a relationship with Lucas, but she behaves like she's in a relationship with Nathan. And this has been the crux of her struggle this season: this misalignment between word and deed, between heart and head. Nathan and Elizabeth haven't went on a single date this season, shared a single meal, etc. but we have undoubtedly been watching their relationship grow and progress and struggle all season.

And Lucas has finally allowed himself to acknowledge that. He goes to Elizabeth's house in the morning only to find Nathan already there (and inside the house); he goes to the schoolhouse later (and he says he decided to stop by on a whim, but we know that's not true - he stopped by because Nathan was at her house that morning) and catches Elizabeth staring at Nathan as he rides by in a moment where Nathan is oblivious to her regard. When Carson is talking to Lucas about his struggles with Faith, Lucas removes the veil he's put over his eyes. Elizabeth has never been in this with him - not really. He's in the middle of what's basically a lovers' quarrel. I think he's always known it on some level, which is why he's never accepted any of Elizabeth's invitations to enter her home. Lucas doesn't feel comfortable in such a private, intimate space because that space isn't his to occupy. When he finally breaks up with Elizabeth, he uses very deliberate wording: what he says tells both the audience and Elizabeth that Lucas understands and accepts that he's stepped into a place that he shouldn't be in. Let's break that breakup scene down:

Lucas: "Elizabeth, you've always maintained that love is worth fighting for. And that includes when it needs defending."

Emphasis is mine. Now, Lucas leads with this which sets the tone right out the gate, because we know that Lucas doesn't share Elizabeth's sentiments here. He hasn't fought for her at all this season; when Nathan confronted him and told him that he hadn't given up on Elizabeth, Lucas tells him to do whatever he wants and walks away. Lucas has been on offense all season.

Nathan, however, has been on defense. Nathan and Elizabeth actually, though they've been defending from different angles and against different things. Nathan has outright been defending himself as well as his love for and relationship with Elizabeth against everyone; but, in a more subtle way, Elizabeth has also been defending herself, and Nathan, and their relationship. We see some of this onscreen: Elizabeth declines Lucas's offer to confront Nathan about the Jack situation, rebuffs Lucas's attempts to show her physical affection, keeps her and Nathan's issues/conversations/interactions mostly private ... but this next bit of conversation makes me wonder about something else.

Lucas: "... And while I'm not resentful, from what I've seen, and from what you've told me, I believe that you and Nathan still ... Love is not just an emotion. It's also an act of will. It can't be demanded. It can't be forced. I want you to find your true love. And in order to do that, I want ... I need to set you free."

This was such a strong moment for Lucas. He is telling Elizabeth in a direct but compassionate way that he understands that she's not really in this with him - and that it's okay. He's bowing out with grace. But, this also makes me wonder how those conversations between Elizabeth and Lucas went that we didn't get to see onscreen. We know from things we've seen on screen that at least two of Elizabeth and Lucas's conversations were pushed off from the moment so that they could be discussed later. One of those conversations was about Allie after the stunt she pulled at the adoption ceremony. While it's subtle, Elizabeth does defend Allie when she's talking to Lucas by saying something about how she doesn't think that it's just a matter of explaining to Allie why Elizabeth and Nathan weren't together. How did that conversation go later? Has Elizabeth been quietly defending Nathan, and Allie, and her relationship with both in private moments with Lucas? Because it has been made clear this season that Elizabeth's relationship with Nathan, and Allie, is private and she doesn't really allow anyone else to get involved with that. Not really. Elizabeth and Nathan deal with their own relationship and issues, and they co-parent Allie and discuss her behavior and relationships, but no one else is really welcome in those conversations. We don't see Nathan even attempt to have those conversations with anyone else, and any time Lucas tries to talk about it with Elizabeth she shuts him down or deflects. And I do say that Elizabeth and Nathan are still co-parenting Allie, though we've mostly seen Nathan doing it alone this season. Still, it was no accident that when Elizabeth and Nathan were arguing at the parade she says "WE have to find a way to make things alright for her." That wasn't the royal we. Elizabeth means we as in her and Nathan.

And there's the rub, my friends. Elizabeth tells everyone that she and Nathan are not in a relationship but she never stops acting like they are. She chooses Nathan (and Allie) over and over again, without fail. Because love isn't just an emotion, it's a choice (or an act of will, as Lucas says). Elizabeth keeps choosing Nathan. Whether she means to or not, whether she's even consciously aware she is doing it, even in moments where she tries to do the opposite, the result is always the same.

And Lucas has finally accepted that. More importantly, Elizabeth has finally accepted that. She's finally made it to the place where choosing Nathan is no longer frightening. It's no coincidence that Elizabeth isn't ready to remove her wedding rings until Lucas breaks up with her - until after she's offered to give a pair of her late husband's gloves to Nathan. She is finally ready to let Jack go, and to stop hiding behind Lucas. It has been a long, rough season for those of us who have wanted Nathan and Elizabeth together, but we've made it! There is nothing in their way now; we, and they, have made it through all of the obstacles. The only thing left now is one last declaration of love: Elizabeth's.

And I just can't wait!

[novels-lover]

Review of this son of York.

This is one of the most recent fictional novels about the life of Richard III from his childhood to his death, how is it different from other books? Well, it includes the scoliosis of Richard III as something crucial in his life that defines his character, despite the fact that the author seems to have a positive opinion of RIII in other books that she has written releated to him in this novel RIII is not innocent of all the crimes of those that history has accused him over the centuries, rather the book seeks to present us a balanced portrait of RIII, so he is not a misunderstood hero as in other recent books, the truth is that the book does not have success portraying his childhood that ended up being an illogical and simple portrait, his adolescence is affected by scoliosis and the problems of the country at this point the book does present an interesting, dark, insecure, ambitious character but not a bad person, here i would say that the book improves and becomes a quick read although it sacrifices the descriptive details in the process which does not allow you to get involved in the plot or in the scenarios, even so it becomes a good reading it develops the facts in an entertaining way, the ending is very well achieved with a dramatic and nostalgic touch, it is not a bad book but to be recent it leaves out many facts that are known from history of RIII, it is not the best book about RIII not the worst has good moments so I give it 3 stars no five because throughout the book many events become absurd.

SPOILERS

Anne Easter the author of this book has been writing novels about the family and even Richard's mistress who according to her book (A rose for the crown) gave him 3 children, and in this book she finally decided to take RIII as her character main bringing back to Kate the mistress presented in a rose for the crown, the books are not exactly a saga so it is not necessary to read the others to understand this one or any other.

Richard is a child who grows up in hard times, he faces the death of his father and political betrayals, which makes him a strong child who learns about justice and life (the lessons are credible but they are presented to him and absorbed in a rather ridiculous way), he is sent to the house of his cousin Richard Neville Kingmaker with whom he creates a bond, there he meets other childrens who will be his friends but unlike other books in this case Rob Percy is initially the closest to Richard not Francis Lovell, during these years of training Richard experiences a physical attraction a bit sexualized by Isabel Neville the eldest daughter of his mentor the kingmaker , Richard is almost a teenager like Isabel so this adoration is understandable but unfortunately she he ignores Richard because she likes Geroge of clarence Richard's hated brother with whom he can never get along because of the bulling and the incompatibility of personalities Geroge is an idiot ambitious and Richard is loyal and hardworking (the book does not do a great job showing these positive things in Richard at least not convincingly) Richard soon gets over his "adoration" for Isabel, oh by the way around fluttering like a butterfly is Anne Neville ,Isabel's younger sister who is almost obsessed with Richard whom she sees as a hero Why? No idea , he does nothing but treat her with contempt and manipulate her during those years but Anne seems to be determined to be a victim of life from the beginning. Richard soon begins to be independent and gets a mistress named Kate with whom he has a relationship of pure love and passion (quite romanticized and totally tragic: a royal duke and she a poor nobody) they have three children but Kate will hide the last one from him, Why? For Richard not to have this son on his conscience and go to his political marriage guilt-free (despite the fact that he was conceived before he got married which makes this part absurd and stupid, I mean two bastard children have to be accepeted by his future wife but THREE ?? (would be impossible according to kate's logic), the good thing is that we do not read so much of this cloying and silly romance, although it is clear to us that Kate is and will always be Richard's true love.

Richard suffers bitterly, the scoliosis feels that God punishes him and becomes pious (although he sleeps with Kate who is married and not to him obviosly ) the scoliosis bothers him a lot and is worse when he ends up in Exile in Burgundy for the second time in his life because his brother loses the throne, and more painful for Richard is knowing that his mentor Kingmaker is on the other side fighting for the Lancaster house and has also given his youngest daughter Anne Neville in marriage to Prince Edward of Lancaster that affects Richard and he is like: Nooo Anne! They say that Edward is a monster for sure it will be bad on her and now that I think about it, I would like her for a wife because of her pedigree (So Richard was an idiot with Anne but he is a Duke of York so it's okay, not that this Edward is a Lancaster so he does not have permission to be an idiot with Anne ok ....) Richard triumphs as a commander of his brothe York won and he becomes a hero, everything seems to be going well he has a good relationship with his brother the King and even with his sister-in-law queen Elizabeth, but the ugly part is that his duty is to assassinate the deposed King Henry VI whom he kills with his own hands (It sounds like something stolen from Shakespeare's play, it is also done in an absurd way, it is something like "take off clumsy mercenary I will do it ") from that moment Richard is convinced that God punishes him for this murder and the scoliosis worsens which leads him to develop mood swings and outbursts of anger, he goes to rule the north and decides to marry Anne Neville who lost her husband during the last battle of course that she is still stupidly in love with Richard, he leaves his mistress and promises to focus on his wife Anne who is a strong and sweet girl loving him nonetheless his bastards or his scolicis, she bears his mood swings, the love he always keeps in his heart for kate over the years, and waits in the sanctuary for months because Richard is a bit clumsy negotiating for their marriage with his brothers, thir life together is not so bad in general and he is faithful (in body because in mind he couldn't stop thinking about Kate even after Anne's death he falls into her arms again) he treats Anne with respect but he is not the husband of the year, for him Anne is a consolation but she will never be Kate who he sees through the years and he even uses his children as a remembrance of that love, all this while Anne goes around rubbing his sore back, being a good stepmother, a good wife, an excellent consort, and loving him madly, which I never understood, except to make love to her with charm, he does not do much to make her happy. (seriously Anne why did you love him all your life?).

Richard manages the north with efficiency and sees happy how is killed George Clarence his brother, not only he does not care about him but it seems good to him that they kill him as always they hated each other is understandable or should be but is not ( Richard felt gulty and sad for killing Henry VI, he became pious and God fearing but then he goes to support his own brother's murder for not reason apart from their childish fights every three or more years that they meet each other but it seems that was good for the plot so Richard kills someone else )

He becomes King at the death of his brother Edward with the typical version, Edward's non-legal marriage, Buckigham manipulates everything (Richard becomes alcoholic as events progress and does not use his logic much to unravel all the conspiracies), I was surprised that he will not kill the princes (Shakespeare must be disappointed), his niece elizabeth falls in love with him, Why? No idea at this point Richard is not only angry all the time but also a little out of control with the situation but she loves him, and gets angry when he rejects her "I hate you man I will marry Henry Tudor" (as if she had a vote in the bussines) The ending explains well the betrayal and the mental state of Richard I think that the most redeemable in general is this Richard that is dark quite complex but does not convince me especially considering that he was a man who even today generates hate or love, they had reasons to hate him but I saw few to love him, I think only Kate and Edward could consider him a good person in this book because he trated them well almost always, I recognize that the character is well done the author does a good job with him but I am not convinced nor do I like him I think he is terribly poorly balanced and the book for me is full of silly or a little absurd things that ruined the story, in general I am disappointed to know that now with so much information avaliable Anne easter still went for myths instead of go for facts or use her logic .

[wendystales]

Memories - lrh (Chapter Seven)

Memories (also on Wattpad)

Chapter Six ※※※※※ Chapter Eight

The sun and heat were plaguing Los Angeles today. Even in the shade, there was no truce. Despite the unbearable heat, I didn't want to miss a beautiful day locked inside the house, so I decided to accompany my best friend in a photoshoot today.

We parked in front of a one floor house, in fact, it looked more like a shed with a very simple appearance. We entered through the next door, avoiding the reception. As soon as we enter, I see a huge space with several colorful panels scattered, in addition to other objects of scenery and lighting.

When Noah closes the door, a round of applause begins, who are applauding? I see a team of about twenty people lined up and among them, the only one I recognize is Kyleen, who wore a belt with several makeup brushes.

Without understanding, I start to applaud everyone, including the twins. Is it their birthday? Everyone is staring at us, so I approach Leah slowly.

“Who are we applauding?” I ask confused.

“You, duh!” she smile.

I look at everyone, confused. Why are you applauding me? My cheeks start to heat up and I don't know what to do.

In a few seconds, the noise stops and I feel compelled to say something. I get closer to the team, noticing the smile that everyone had on their faces.

“Uh, I don't even know what to say. Everyone should already know about amnesia, however, I would like to say that regardless of my memory, I am very grateful to all of you for all the assistance. If I really am that amazing model that I've been seeing, it's definitely due to you. Thank you so much, for everything and for now, for this reception and all the affection.” I bow a little, ending this speech project, awkwardly.

One by one, everyone comes to hug me. It is so strange. I, the ‘invisible’, not popular, who always stayed in my corner, had become a famous model. Today several people wanted to meet me, say hello or just say ‘hi’. It is strange, but it is good.

After all the reception, I follow Leah and Kyleen into the dressing room, watching my friend prepare for another photoshoot while Noah heads for a meeting.

Because of my condition, all the rehearsals and campaigns that I would do were passed on to Leah, so this month she had a very busy schedule. I make a face when I watch her trying to get into a rubber-like jumpsuit. Her hair was well armed and her makeup was loaded, her eyes were full of gloss. And I like this?

“You are very lucky that I love you and you are in this condition. Because I hate these revolutionary photoshoots.” she snorts, trying to go to the table and put on the huge pearl earrings.

“And I like?” I still question without accepting.

“No, but you always do. God knows why.” she stands upright, taking a little walk, looking at herself in the mirror. “Shit, the panties are on my ass.” she complains, leaving the dressing room and trying to get her panties out of the way.

“My God, Leah!” Kyleen scolds, trying not to laugh.

In the studio, I sit next to Kiki, who between one photo and another was going to touch up Leah's makeup. I am amazed to see my friend shine through the flashes. She makes it look so easy, stopping in several different poses, staring at the camera without laughing, with those big models faces.

“She is amazing.” I comment with the owner of the colored hair beside me, who agrees with me.

After several photos, again I go to the dressing room watching my friend now exchange the jumpsuit for a loose dress. As soon as the new makeup was done, Kiki stops behind me, pasting her face to mine.

“What do you think about doing makeup?” the sparkle in her eyes and Leah's smile in the chair next to me, show me how much they want it.

“Promise you won't make that eye full of gloss?” I ask smiling weakly, noticing the brightness in her eyes grow as she promises.

I lay my head on the back and close my eyes at the command of my friend. The whole process is fast and Kyleen does a very light and simple makeup, just hiding some scratches that I still have on my face and neck. In the eyes, a pink tone makes only the contrast deepening my concave and a beautiful eyeliner, which I would never be able to do.

Taking advantage of the fact that I was still in her hands, Kiki takes advantage and braids the top of my head, leaving the rest loose, making me feel like a princess.

“You are amazing.” I compliment her, giving a long kiss on her cheek in thanks.

I hold her hand, heading back to the studio to follow the rest of Leah's photos.

“So, Marnie, what do you think of some pictures?” Brandon, the photographer, comes towards me. I look at him, scared and saying nothing.

I seek help from my friends and even from other people on the team, but no one helps me. In fact, everyone motivates me.

“I don't know, I'm not dressed up and I'm all hurt yet.” I try to hold on to excuses.

“It does not need to be tidy and we will not publish anything, it is just for you to see yourself and maybe adapt again.” he offers the idea.

I face everyone again, not finding help. I close my eyes, giving up. I reach out to Brandon who lets out a loud celebration and takes me over to the square box Leah used to occupy.

Brandon guides me through the poses and looks. I feel my cheeks warm and I'm sure I'm looking like a tomato. I try to release myself with each photo and command they give me, even release a song to try to relax me, but in the end I start laughing.

In the back of my mind, I hear Ashton's voice, giving Brandon one of my orders as "more cheeky", "more mysterious" and even snarling, which only disturbs me. As I walk my eyes through the lights and camera, in my mind another memory comes back.

I can see Ashton sitting on the chairs with Kyleen, "trying" to help me. I just watched Brandon waiting for him to tell the Australian boy to shut up, but he just smiled. I continue my hard work of ignoring my friend, but it comes to a point where he is snarling and scratching the air, which breaks my concentration and makes me laugh.

I end up smiling with the memory still running through my head. In the end, the photos were beautiful, mostly I left laughing, a spontaneous and contagious laugh. My laughter closes when I see Luke's tall figure enter the studio.

I hold my breath with each step he takes, approaching us. He pulls up his sunglasses, showing his pale blue eyes.

“What are you doing here?” Leah asks while getting stuffed with Cheetos.

“I came to pick up Marnie.” he turns to me, giving a closed smile. I widen and run my eyes over to my friends, not knowing what to do.

“Me?” I question after a bug time.

“Ah yes! Your mother called me saying she was stuck at work. She wanted to know if there would be any problems if I took you to the doctor. I said no.” he shrugs.

Once again, I look back at Leah and Kiki, who are just as stuck as I am. Before I open my mouth, Luke's focus turns to the screen next to me, looking at the pictures I just took. I watch your eyes smile.

“They were beautiful.” I smile to him, when he looks back at me.

“Thanks.” I let out the air again. “Well, if I don't get in the way, that's fine. We can go.” Kyleen brings my bag, handing it to Luke. I say goodbye to everyone, I thank Brandon for the photos and slowly leave with him.

I hold my breath again when he closes the door next to me. What am I doing? Getting stuck in a car with Luke days after we broke up? What's my problem? I embrace my broken arm, closing myself.

The drive way to the hospital couldn't have been worse, or whatever. We were quiet all the time. In fact, I stayed. Luke even tried to pull something up, but I couldn't follow, I just crashed. When we arrived, I almost jumped out of the car and followed as fast as I could inside, leaving him almost alone.

What am I doing? What am I doing?

I notice from the corner of my eye, he is approaching while I check in.

“Are you okay?” I look confused at him when we sit down. “The doctor, are you feeling well?” he points to my leg and arm.

“Ah yes! He asked me to come back just to confirm.” I smile to ease my behavior so far. “I just hope he doesn't order a blood test.” I whisper, already feeling a cold wave run down my spine.

My body freezes even more when I see Luke's hand cover mine and give it a little squeeze. I open my eyes wide and Luke realizes by quickly letting go of my hand, apologizing.

“You have been facing a tsunami of confusion and you are doing well, a needle is nothing close to this.” he jokes in an attempt to relax me and break the strange climate.

“ I'd much rather have my amnesia and all that mess than the damn needle.” out of the corner of my eye I notice Luke trying not to laugh and I end up smiling. I take a deep breath, grabbing his hand, as I look across the hall, falsely interested in the ceiling lighting.

During the fifteen minutes we sat there, he did not let go of my hand. I was rambling about that scene and about us. Not remembering him was killing me. Every day I had at least two to three memories, not to mention the things I read, which leads me to stay with the imagination. However, Luke was still the only person I still couldn't remember and probably the most important.

Even with the diary, videos on social medias and photos. It only sank my hopes of going back. I mean, I know I can let my guard down and try to fall in love with him again, but that alternative is not yet an option and it scares me because it has no attraction.

“May I ask you a question?” I begin, in an attempt to break that unbearable silence between us.

“Sure, as many as you want.” Luke answers, super willing.

“What's the nickname? Why does everyone call me M&Ms?” Luke opens a smile, trying not to get a laugh.

“Well, on the serious side of it.” I wrinkle my forehead. Is there a serious side to this? “It's your initials. Marnie Elizabeth McGonagall, M - & - M.” it’s strange how good it’s to hear my name in his mouth.

“And the less serious side?” I have my suspicions, but I want to confirm.

“That you know! You are crazy about M&Ms. I remember countless discussions we had and then you forgave me because I gave you M&Ms.” my cheeks heat up in shame. Damn obsession with chocolate.

“That's why I wasn't surprised with that thing that separates them by colors in my kitchen.” Luke gives a laugh.

“I don't think I've ever seen you so happy to buy something so useless.” I look at the blonde, totally offended.

“It is not useless, it is for them to stay organized and none feel bad that I am eating one color more than another.” I defend my point, facing the hallway again. I strange the silence and look at Luke. “What?”

He keeps his lips tightly pressed. He wants to laugh. Your eyes carry an amused glow. Maybe he was just teasing me, because he would know that I would say something like that. After all, he knows me better than anyone.

I ignore him again. Still holding hands, we waited for the doctor to call me. Every second that passes makes me more anxious. I start hitting my leg on the floor and I want to poke my nails, but a hand is caught between his fingers and I don't want to disturb him.

For a few seconds, I look at Luke. His head against the wall and his eyes closed, make me more relaxed to analyze it without shame. I admire his long hair falling in several curls, finding himself with a very short beard, but that looks great on him.

I lower my gaze to a stop on his neck. Did we… already have sex? I look at his chest with more concentration, wondering how many times I must have passed my hands over there. I take a deep breath and risk lowering my gaze. Oh my God, did I already suc…

“Do you want to ask anything more?” I jump in the chair, startling me with his voice. Luke carries a mischievous smile as he looks at me.

Oh my God, he saw me looking at him and at him. Oh my God. Is it possible to die for being more ashamed!?

“No, I'm fine.” I turn my face to him. “I am fine!” I say softly. I hear your little laugh and I want to bury myself on the floor.

For my total bad luck, it takes the doctor a few more minutes to call me. And during this long and endless wait, I decide not to ask Luke any more questions. In fact, I decide not to look him in the face, just in case.

Seriously Marnie, did you let him catch you drooling on him!?

“Do you want me to come with you?” he offers himself, when the doctor finally calls me.

“No! It´s okay. I believe it is quick.”

“Good afternoon, Miss McGonagall, how are we?” the doctor gives a friendly smile.

Bad.

I take a deep breath, ignoring my mind, no matter how much we're here for it. I follow the consultation by answering the questions he asks. According to him, I seem to be reacting very well, which makes him believe that my amnesia is only temporary.

The doctor asks me to sit on the stretcher and look at my foot. The first time I saw my foot, it looked like a baby watermelon of so swollen it was. But in the last few days, it had improved a lot, since I was following the recommendation to always let it rest and on ice a few times.

“Are you still in pain?” he questions looking carefully.

“No. Will I be able to take it out?” I question hopefully.

“I think so! Let's do a test, you can come back without the boot, but if you feel pain or any discomfort, put it on immediately and return here, okay?”

“All right!” Unfortunately I would have to come back with the boot, because I didn't bring another shoe.

“I will order some tests too and as soon as they are ready, you can return for us to analyze.” I quietly watch him take the orders, feeling my stomach churn when I see the word blood. Shit.

I try to distract myself and turn my head to whoever is outside. Luke. I look quickly at the door, as if I can see him through the wood. I let out the air, still not knowing what to do about it.

I wish I could snap my fingers and see everything magically resolve, or just sleep and wake up when everything is in place.

"Would you like to ask something, Miss McGonagall?" the doctor leans on his desk looking at me attentively.

My face heats up and I smile nervously. I don't know if that would be something that my doctor could help me with, but it costs nothing.

“Is it possible to forget someone forever? I mean, I've had memories with basically everyone who lives with me, except one person. Would it be possible for my brain to delete it?” he scratches his chin surprised by my question.

“Well, first of all, do you want to remember this person?” I positively nod. “Do you really want to or try to convince yourself that you want to, but, deep down, you are not ready for that yet?” he raises an eyebrow. I open my mouth but nothing comes out.

I want to remember Luke and everything we live in, however, I am also afraid that even with the memories back, things will not be as they were before. I already screwed things up with Luke once, I don't want to screw it up again.

This is too horrible, because he is sweet and I do not believe that I would act like him if the situation was the other way around.

“Miss McGonagall, the brain is still a new field for medicine. It behaves in different ways for the same problem, so everything that involves it is studied and closely monitored. There is nothing to prevent this ‘block’ on a certain person from being created by you. Even if you say out loud that you want to remember, your body knows what you really want, because, even involuntarily, you transmit signals to your brain, maintaining the block.” it makes sense.

“I believe that I am only afraid, as much as I want, fear prevents me.” I say low.

“Can I offer you some advice?” I look at him in surprise, before agreeing. “Talk to that person. Be clear and sincere. Say you are afraid, but despite them, you want to remember everything. Help comes from those we least expect.” again, he gives a sympathetic and compassionate smile.

“Thank you very much, doctor.” I thank before I leave the office.

I approach Luke slowly, who gets up with a smile.

“All very well?”

“Yes, I finally got rid of the boot.”

“And why do you look like that?” he looks at me suspiciously.

“We need to talk.” I announcement tense. I see him frown, confused. “I'm going to need your help with something.”

“Marnie, you're making me worried, is everything okay? Did something happen?”

“Everything is fine.” I assure him. “It's about amnesia. It's about us.”

[lifeofkaze]

An Art of Balance #1

A/N: I can’t believe I’m doing this, welcome to my fanfiction comeback after more than ten years. Jesus Christ, I’m nervous af. Feel free to comment and correct me (not my first language, sorry if sth is wrong), I’d be super happy for someone to beta me in fact! As the quidditch timelines are kind of messed up, I put Skye and MC in the same year, ignoring the fact that they are not supposed to know each other initially. Orion and McNully are one year above them. Enjoy!

 Word Count: ~ 2.800

______________________________________________________________

“What I dream of is an art of balance.”- Henri Matisse

 Chapter 1: New Beginnings

It was a hot day. It was, in fact, far too hot for this time of the year. The sun was blazing down relentlessly on Kings Cross Station, its windows shining in the glaring sunlight. It was not only hot, the air was also muggy as well. Lizzie Jameson fidgeted in her clothes as she pushed her cart through the dense mass of students and parents saying their goodbyes, looking for familiar faces to begin her ride to Hogwarts for her fifth year with.

“Do try to stay out of trouble this time, will you, dear?”

Her mother was walking closely behind her, eager to give her daughter last minute advice on how to behave properly for once. Lizzie rolled her eyes at the huge grey cat towering above her trunk in its cage, only listening half-heartedly.

“Sure, Mum, I’ll try my best… it’s not like I’m asking for trouble, you know?”

She heard the soft laugh of her mother and turned around to see her smiling fondly at her.

“I’m not so sure of that one.”

She opened her arms and Lizzie gave her a hug.

“Oi, Jameson! Over here!”

She looked up and saw a familiar head of black and blue hair waving through the crowd. Lizzie let go of her mother.

“Mum, there’s Skye over there, waiting for me.”

“It’s alright, dear. Go on ahead.”

Her mum gave her another quick hug and slightly pushed her away. “Just promise me to try. Be good, study and write sometime!”

Lizzie just laughed, barely listening anymore, waved and made her way over to Skye, who was standing beside her father in a thick mass of flustered students admiring the Quidditch star. He broke into a smile as he saw her approach.

“Well, if it isn’t Elizabeth Jameson, the second best chaser Hufflepuff has seen in a while!” Ethan Parkin, famous chaser of the Wigton Wanderers, gave her a slap on the back. “Are you ready for another shot at the Quidditch cup, Lizzie? I already gave Skye a detailed briefing on how to- “.

“It’s alright, dad,” Skye piped in, “I can recite your strategies in my sleep, we’ll be good.” She grinned at Lizzy. “Let’s go find a seat and some of the others. I can’t wait to tell you what stunts I’ve been trying out over summer break!”

The Hogwarts Express was slowly running out of Kings Cross station when Skye and Lizzie finally had a chance to look for a place to seat. Having been on the Hufflepuff Quidditch team for several years now, they had gained quite the popularity with their house mates.

Exhausted from greeting what felt like the whole of their house, they finally found the department they had been looking for. Inside sat the rest of their little Quidditch gang, their fellow chaser and team captain Orion Amari and the not-so-impartial commentator Murphy McNully. McNully was excitedly telling Orion what seemed to be the new statistics he had come up with during summer break, while Orion was sitting cross-legged on his seat with his eyes closed and a zoned-out smile on his face. When they entered, he opened his eyes and smiled warmly at the sight of them.

“Ah, there you are! I knew there was a 77% chance of you coming here to join us, we kept seats for you!” McNully shouted excitedly.

“What are the other 23%?”, Lizzie wanted to know.

“You might have run into Penny Haywood or Rowan Khanna first. I think the chances of Rowan actually enjoying our company are at about 16 %. At best. So, I figured she wouldn’t want to sit with us. Which means, if she would have met you first, she would have asked you to sit with her, which you would of course have agreed to, as she is you best friend because you met her back in Diagon Alley before your first year and- “.

“Shut up, McNully.” Skye rolled her eyes at him and looked over to Lizzie. “It’s true though, she doesn’t really seem to like us that much.”

Lizzie shrugged. “No idea really, she actually really enjoys Quidditch. I guess she is just more of the watching type. Or reading about it, for that matter. But don’t you worry about her.”

Lizzie laid back in her seat next to Murphy, enjoying the cool air that was streaming from the partially open window into the stuffed cabin. She leaned forward again, putting her feet on the seat opposite of her and looked at her friends. “So, what have you guys been up to this summer? Ready for a brand-new year, brand-new season?”

Skye’s face immediately lit up with excitement. “You bet I am! Wait ‘til you see the tricks my dad taught me! We will stomp Ravenclaw into the dust in no time, just you wait!”

McNully only shook his head next to her. “Winning against Ravenclaw only makes up 30 % of what it takes to win the Cup, Skye. There are still Gryffindor and Slytherin to beat as well.”

Skye tilted her head, looking at him questioningly. “That’d make 90 %, what’s with the missing 10 %? Luck or what?”

McNully laughed. “I don’t believe in luck. No, it’s way better than that! We’re talking team compositions, daily form, weather conditions, bludger flight path velocity…” He gazed dreamily into the distance. “I could go on forever.”

Skye shook her head. “Don’t. Besides, all that stuff doesn’t help you win a match if you can’t hold yourself on a broom when you need to.

“But it can!”, McNully retorted, “There are so many factors influencing that as well. Just think about the grip factor on the broom handle, or centrifugal powers during turns or- “

Leaving them to their discussion, Lizzie got up and sat down next to her team captain. Watching them bicker back and forth, she couldn’t help but smile fondly. “They will never find middle ground, will they?”

Orion watched them thoughtfully. “Why would they? All the different beliefs we have are but representations of the many sides of Quidditch.”

Lizzie looked at him, processing what he just had said. “I guess you’re right.” She smiled. “How has your summer been?”

He shrugged. “I’ve let myself flow wherever the universe destined me to go.”

Lizzy shook her head at his answer, nebulous as ever. “And have you flown any interesting place in particular?”

“I did spend a lot of time surrounded by nature, reconnecting with myself, finding the balance to focus on what’s to come.”

Lizzie grinned. “So, wandering about in the woods, is that it?”

Orion chuckled softly. She had a way of breaking down his words. “Yes, you could put it that way.”

They chatted on about hiking and the trails Lizzie’s parents had taken her to this summer for a while before they fell into a comfortable silence, watching the trees outside rush by and listening to Skye’s and McNully’s bickering.

*

Lizzie jerked awake when the door to their department banged open and a whirlwind of blond hair burst in. Judging by the golden light outside, she must have slept for almost the entire ride.

“Lizzie, Skye! It’s so good so to see you all, I’ve been looking for you since we left London.”

Penny Haywood smiled her radiant smile at them, letting herself fall into the seat next to Lizzie. Lizzie rubbed her eyes, brain still foggy from her nap. “The train is only so long, and we’ve almost arrived, what have you been doing for so long?”

Penny giggled. “Oh, you know, catching up here and there, saying hello to people… There is SO much stuff I have to tell you later!”

Lizzy grinned at her. “Lots of juicy gossip?”

Penny laughed out loud. “You bet!” She lowered her voice. “Did you know that Billingsley apparently blew up his pumpkin pastry earlier, right in Merula Snyde’s face? And rumour has it, Tonks and Tulip have declared a prank war for this year!”

Lizzy shot an annoyed glance at Skye, who had started talking considerably louder, waving her hands in McNully’s face when Penny had entered. “No, I didn’t know that,” she replied. “Sounds like we’re in for quite a ride.”

“As always with these two.” Penny turned towards the cage where the ears of Lizzies cat had jerked up upon her entering. “Aw, hello Mousey, my sweet darling, have you missed me?” The grey cat purred, rubbing her head against Penny’s outstretched hand through the bars of her carrier.

Skye snorted. “Are you talking to that little devil over there? I swear, if that fur ball so much as touches my quills this year, I’ll make a hat out of her!”

Ignoring her, Penny rubbed Mouse’s chin. “We have no idea who she is talking about, right, Mousey? Such a good girl you are!” She suddenly looked up, waving at someone passing by their carriage. Lizzie followed her gaze just to see whoever she had been waving at quickly picking up their pace. But not quick enough for her to not recognise the familiar face.

She got up off her seat and stepped out into the hallway. “Hey, Rowan! Hey, wait up!” Rowan Khanna, her best friend since the beginning of her Hogwarts journey together, stopped dead in her tracks and turned.

“Oh… hey, Liz… sorry, didn’t see you. How’s things going?”

Lizzie frowned. She’d imagined Rowan being excited to see her, hugging her and asking about her summer, like she always did. She opened her mouth to speak when Penny, who had followed her, spoke up.

“Hello Rowan, how are you? Congratulations again on becoming a prefect, first step to being Head Girl managed!”

Rowan said nothing, looking sheepishly at Lizzie, whose gaze had dropped to the shiny yellow and black prefect badge sitting on the chest of Rowan’s robes.

“Wow, Rowan congrats! You really deserve that,” Lizzie exclaimed. She’d had no idea her best friend had been being chosen as one of Hufflepuff’s new prefects.

Rowan’s cheek blushed a little. “Yeah, well thanks, I guess. See you guys at the station.”

She awkwardly waved goodbye and hurried off. Penny arched her eyebrows. “What was that about? She was rather weird, wasn’t she?”

Lizzie didn’t answer, still staring after her friend. She remembered what Penny had said. “You knew about her becoming prefect?” she asked.

Penny looked at her bewildered. “Of course, she wrote to me as soon as she learned. Didn’t she tell you?”

Lizzie shook her head. “No, not a word. We didn’t write a lot this summer, in fact. I thought she would have told me something that important to her.”

Penny shrugged. “Don’t worry, maybe your letters were just badly timed or something.” They stepped back into their cabin and Penny dropped into her seat. “Do you know who else was chosen?”

“I only know Charlie is a prefect now, he told me as soon as the owl arrived.”

Penny smiled a very innocent smile at her. “Charlie Weasley instantly sent you a letter when he learned he was appointed prefect?”

Lizzie shot her a glance. “Stop looking at me like that. Yes, he did, because we happen to be friends. Just friends, alright? No baseless assumptions before the new term has even started!”

Penny just grinned, prompting Lizzie to roll her eyes. “Actually, I had thought they would choose you, Penny. Top notch grades, loved by everyone, barely getting into trouble, sounds like an ideal prefect.”

“Not since she started hanging with us,” Skye chuckled. “Penny’s been to too many pre- and post-match parties for the teachers’ liking, I guess.”

A light laugh escaped Penny’s throat. “Busted! But how could I say no to celebrating victory with the Skye Parkin?”

Skye said nothing and looked out of the window for a moment. “More celebrating defeat when it comes to last year.” Her attention shifted over to Orion. “Seriously though, do you have a plan for this year? Like, we finished last year in not the best state and we need a new beater as well.”

Lizzie went pale at that. “Merlin forbid, you won’t have me play beater again, will you?”

Orion looked at her calmly. “As you know, to me all positions are equal, merging into one another to form one complete team.”

Skye grabbed hold of Lizzie’s arm possessively. “Oh no, no, no, Amari, don’t you dare taking her from me again. That season with her as beater was mediocre at best. We want to have a shot at the Cup, we need her as our third chaser.”

“Don’t fear Skye. While I think Lizzie made a formidable beater, I agree with you. She’s evolved into a true chaser. No, we will hold try outs to see if a new calling arises in one of our fellow housemates.”

Satisfied with his answer, Skye let go of Lizzie, who was peering out of the window.

“I am really glad to hear that.” She pulled Skye to her feet.

“Come on, girls, we’re almost there, let’s get changed.” She grabbed the bag with her school robes inside and waited impatiently until Skye had dug up hers out of the chaos that was her trunk.

***

They had nearly arrived at Hogsmeade Station when Skye, Penny and Lizzie returned.

Orion was clasping his robe over his sweater, feeling uncomfortable. He hated wearing his school uniform, he always felt confined in them. He was already looking forward to changing into his loose shirt and coat again.

He touched his tie, looking at McNully questioningly. “Good?”

His friend grinned at him. “Not as good-looking as me, but good enough, I guess.”

He pointed to Orion’s neck. “You forgot your necklace, though.”

Orion ran his hand over the round pendant he always wore around his neck, tucking it down his shirt. “No, I didn’t. I am not taking it off if I don’t have to.”

“I know.” McNully waved a hand at him. “I’ve never seen you without it, except when you’re playing Quidditch, which is because all pieces of jewellery have to be removed for safety reasons, since we became friends, which was in our first year, of course, when you took the bed next to me in the dorm and we started chatting and…”

He actually managed to stop himself. “What I want to say, I know you don’t like taking it off.”

The door opened and Penny, Skye, and Lizzie re-entered the cabin. Skye wasn’t looking too happy to be wearing a skirt and robes instead of her signature house sweater and jacket. Orion saw her touching her tie in the same uncomfortable way he had just done.

“Ugh, I hate this uniform so much, it’s just so uncomfortable,” she complained promptly. “I really don’t see why we have to change for, what, two hours, before going back to the Common Rooms and getting out of these. We’ll be wearing them enough during the year.”

Lizzie rolled her eyes at her before reaching for her cat snoozing in her cage. “Can you just stop complaining, please? It’s not like you can change it.”

“Yes, but I can make a point about not liking it.”

“They just want everyone to look proper when the new students walk into the Great Hall for the first time.” Penny casually brushed some dirt off Skye’s shoulder, who shut up immediately.

“Speaking about looking proper, Lizzie, you should really brush out your hair, I don’t think Professor Sprout would appreciate you walking in with hair that messy.”

Lizzy touched her hair she still had tied up in a bun, now worse for wear from the heat and the wind coming from the window. “Oh, I forgot about that.” She pulled her hair band out, shaking out her light brown curls, brushing through them with her fingers as a makeshift brush. “Better?”

Penny looked at her dubiously. “Not much, but it’ll do, I think.” She ran her fingers through a strand of Lizzie’s hair. “I do have to say though, that new length suits you so well, Liz, I’m glad you listened to me and chopped it off.”

Orion watched Lizzie tucking her hair behind her ear. Penny was right, it suited her a lot. Until the end of last year, Lizzie’s long hair had almost come down to her waist. Not being the tallest, it had always made her look younger than she was, almost drowning her.

Now it ended just below her shoulders, the shorter length allowing it to curl stronger than before. She looked much more grown up like that, more feminine. As they were leaving the train, McNully, who was pushing his wheelchair in front of him, shot him a side glance.

“Lizzie looks changed, doesn’t she?”

Orion wondered if he had seen him looking. On second thought, of course he had.

“Is it important how we look on the outside when all that matters is our inside?” he evaded his question nebulously. For once, McNully didn’t reply, following the girls up to the carriages waiting for them.