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voiceless-terror · 4 years

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Hey, I hope I'm not bothering you, but I wanted to know if you're still taking requests? My friend cinnamoniic's birthday is coming up (around the seccond week of march) and I know they're a fan! If you have time, could you fit is a short Jontim or Jonmartim? That would be really cool!!! (As a surprise, please only publish this ask if you're able to take the request)

hello, not bothering at all! I don’t know if this is early or late but happy birthday @cinnamoniic !! a silly little jonmartim for my favorite artist!!

Tim is very, very happy to have his boyfriends over for the night.

It’s their first overnight and he’s looking forward to falling asleep in Martin’s arms and cuddling up close to Jon, whatever happens first. And that’s why he’s placed himself right between the two, Jon lying on the side of the bed against the wall and Martin insisting on the edge ‘in case I get up in the night, don’t want to wake anyone up, you need your rest.’ Ever the gentleman.

But it’s been three hours and not once has Martin made any motion to get up. In fact, he’d fallen asleep almost two minutes after they got situated, sprawled on his back and dead to the world. Tim’s glad Martin can sleep so deeply, he deserves it with the hours he’s pulling. But he’s not very happy about the sounds he makes while doing it.

Martin snores. Tim does too, as he’s been told by previous partners, but Martin’s like a goddamn motorboat. It’s deafening. He refuses to wake him and inform him of this fact, though he wishes Martin had warned him ahead of time. Tim doesn’t want to make him feel bad, but it’s getting to be a bit of a problem. It’s not steady enough to be a comforting white noise, as it occasionally turns into whistles or crescendos into loud roars. Martin’s got range.

And if Martin sleeps like the dead, Jon's the exact opposite. It’s not that he’s woken up at all, no, but he’s constantly rolling around, climbing on top of them at strange and uncomfortable angles. Tim wouldn’t mind the clinging so much if he didn’t change position every fifteen minutes with a jab of his pointy elbows.

He also talks.

It’s all nonsense, of course. Snarky little noises, as if he can’t stop being a little shit even as he sleeps. Sometimes it's a steady stream of enthusiastic mumbling, like his sleepy equivalent of an info-dump. Tim hopes he’s got a captive audience in his dreams.

He murmurs something directly in Tim’s ear, having burrowed himself in the crook of Tim’s neck five minutes prior. After imparting this wisdom, he rolls back over to face the wall.

“You’ve got a point, buddy. He is loud.” Tim sighs, staring up at the ceiling, when a thought occurs to him.

Maybe if Jon’s got a Martin to distract him, he won’t be so bothersome. Martin seems to be a heavy sleeper, and won’t be woken by Jon’s nocturnal gymnastics. With this in mind, he very carefully scoots to the bottom of the bed and reaches for Jon, half dragging, half carrying him closer to Tim’s previous position. Jon immediately clings on to Martin, throwing himself diagonally over his chest with a happy little noise. Martin doesn’t wake. Perfect. Tim shimmies over to Jon’s spot, his back to the wall as he closes his eyes to finally get some rest.

Until Jon’s leg kicks back and hits Tim directly in the stomach. He yelps and struggles to catch his breath, glaring at his two blissfully unaware companions. Jon snuggles into Martin’s arms and the snores reach a new crescendo. This is hell.

Tim tries, he really does. He spends the next thirty minutes curled as far into the corner as he can manage, he puts the pillow over his head. But nothing drowns out the noise and Jon still intermittently kicks at his back, albeit gentler than before.

He truly loves the two of them, more than he ever thought possible. Tim reminds himself of this as Martin attempts to break the sound barrier and Jon puts on a one-man show of Riverdance against his back. But he’s got to get some fucking sleep.

He considers waking the two of them and voicing his complaints. It’s not unreasonable; hell, Tim would want to know if he were the offending party. But he can’t bear the thought of Martin’s guilty little face, and he knows Jon will use it as an excuse to stay up the rest of the night. He could just slip into the living room, but that’ll just cause a fuss come morning. No, it’s time to do some strategic maneuvering. It’ll be difficult, but Tim thinks he can pull it off without waking the two. And he’s never been one to back down from a challenge.

Tim squirms down to the edge of the bed, flipping Jon’s pliant body back to its previous position. He almost falls out of bed when Jon surprises him with an emphatic “Recording ends!” but he quiets after that, curling into a ball.

“Good job, bossman.” A nickname he can only use when Jon can’t hear. He’s not too fond of it, now that they’re dating. Tim still thinks it’s cute.

Now for the hard part. For this one, he’ll have to get out of bed entirely.

As he looms over Martin, Tim tries to figure out the best way to go about this. He gives him a gentle, experimental shove but Martin’s dead weight and does not want to move, stubborn even in sleep and now snoring louder in what seems like protest. Tim pushes back the sleeves of his sleep shirt, shakes out his arms. This is why you lift, Stoker. You can do this. A second push: the man budges a few inches, but there’s still not enough room for Tim to slip in. Martin’s always been stronger than him, much to his chagrin, and he’s never beaten him in arm wrestling. He’s built like a brick house, albeit much comfier. But Tim will not let him win in his sleep. That’s just ridiculous, not to mention embarrassing. So he lets out a grunt and gives it his best shot, the push finally managing to get Martin completely on his side.

And directly on top of Jon.

“Shit!” Tim swears, immediately jumping on the bed at Jon’s muffled squeak, his hands starting to pull Martin back when what little he sees of Jon suddenly relaxes, his face going slack. Tim briefly worries he’s killed him but Jon is in fact breathing, an utterly content look on his face as if all he needed to settle was the pressure of Martin’s arm and half of his body. Tim laughs in disbelief, running a hand through his hair when he notices the sudden quiet.

Martin’s stopped snoring. Not entirely, no, but after a minute of hovering over the man, he hears only the lightest of occasional wheezes. God, I’m a fucking genius. He almost wishes someone had been around to see it. He’s debating taking a picture and sending it to Sasha when he glances at the clock- two am. If he wants to wake up slightly rested, and in time to try Martin’s much-lauded pancakes, he’s going to have to cut his celebrations short.

So he climbs back into bed, attaching himself to the large, warm expanse of Martin’s back and burying his face in the softness of his worn sleep shirt. This is how it’s supposed to be, cozy and comfortable and quiet. Just took a bit of trial and error.

Now to see if it’ll last til morning.

At eight, Martin wakes everyone with a shriek upon finding Jon buried underneath him and takes both Tim and himself off the bed with the force of his backpedaling. They land with a painful thump, Tim swearing as his abused back takes the brunt of the fall. Jon peers sleepily over the edge of the bed and gives the two of them a pleased smile, stretching like a cat basking in sunlight.

“Don’t think I’ve slept better in my life,” he yawns, blinking slowly. “What are you two doing down there?”

“A-are you serious?” Martin stutters, still tangled in the sheets and making no move to get up. Tim can’t help his snicker. “I-I was completely on top of you-”

“We should do that more often,” Jon agrees. “I like having you on top of me.”

It takes Martin about an hour to recover from that statement and around the same time for Jon to realize what he said. And Tim, well, Tim’s just happy to finally get some sleep.

And Martin’s pancakes. He really wasn’t kidding about those.

ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29931783

#tma #the magnus archives #my writing #jonathan sims #tim stoker #martin blackwood #jonmartim #happy birthday!!#i am sorry if this is subpar #i hope you enjoy your day whenever it is!!#you are very talented and sweet and whenever you post it brings a smile to my face #lots of love <33 #Anonymous

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iamanartichoke · 3 years

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Fic prompt: If you feel like doing another hurt/comfort with Mobius, I would love a version of that end scene where Loki's freaking out but it actually is our Mobius. So Mobius listens to everything Loki has to say, and then they just kind of...take a breath, I suppose, before whatever they're going to do to fight Kang - perhaps Loki gets some tea, and/or an actual meal, a little sleep maybe (has he eaten since that cake on the train or slept since that brief nap in ep 2??), or whatever comfort-y stuff you want - I just need that sweet fic healing lmao.

@scintillatingshortgirl19 Thank you for the prompt and I hope you like it! <3

Summary: Takes place at the end of episode 6, where instead of saying "Who are you?" Mobius knows Loki and they pick up from where they left off in the void. Word Count: 1956 Author’s notes: I'm not feeling super confident with these prompts, so please don't judge me bear with me as I dust off my little writer-brain gears and try to find my footing with these new characters and characterizations.

Completed prompts.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” Mobius is saying, holding his hands up, but Loki can’t stop talking. The words are spilling from him; he’s tripping over them, and from the look on Mobius’s face Loki knows he’s not making sense, but still, he can’t stop.

“He’s set on war,” Loki babbles. “We need to prepare, Mobius.”

“Hang on.” When Loki pauses to take a breath, Mobius reaches out and places his hands on Loki’s shoulders. It’s almost comical, the way he needs to reach, as Loki towers over him. Yet Loki feels very small, too, and doesn’t protest the contact. “You’re speaking faster than my brain can process words. Breathe, okay? Start at the beginning.”

Loki doesn’t know when the beginning was. It could have been the moment he’d leapt up and grabbed Sylvie’s arm before she could land a fatal blow to their enemy; it could have been all those days (or months, or hours, Loki has no idea; time, for him, has completely ceased to exist) ago that he’d landed in a Midgardian desert and the TVA immediately swarmed upon him.

“You’re not understanding me.” Frustration colors Loki’s tone. “There’s no time to stop; he’s - they’re - coming.”

“You’re right, I’m not understanding you.” Mobius lets go of Loki’s shoulders and rubs the back of his neck. “I want to, but you gotta slow down and fill me in, okay?”

“Maybe we should take him somewhere,” says B-15. Loki had barely noticed her but now he steps back, his gaze flicking from her to Mobius, taking in the confusion on both of their faces.

“You don’t look so good,” B-15 adds, taking in Loki’s appearance. He must be a sight, he realizes; his hair is matted and tangled and he feels grimy, his skin caked with so much dirt and blood from injuries he doesn’t remember getting.

But, what difference does it make? Loki turns back to Mobius, desperate. “Mobius, listen to me. Sylvie and I -”

“Come on.” Mobius cuts him off. He moves in, taking one of Loki’s arms. “You can tell me everything, okay, Loki? I just need you to calm down and to come with me, preferably before you pass out. Hauling around a five hundred pound demigod wasn’t on my to-do list today.”

Loki bites back a sharp retort. He’s vaguely aware of B-15 taking his other arm, and it’s only once Loki’s shoulders slump and he allows himself to be led away from the shelves that the exhaustion hits him. He’s been running high on adrenaline for hours, and now that he’s moving slowly, supported on either side, all of that energy seems to drain from him at once. His knees buckle.

“Careful,” Mobius says. Were it not for him and B-15 holding him up, Loki is certain he would have collapsed. He squeezes his eyes shut and focuses on placing one foot in front of the other, not caring where they’re going. The archives, the time theater, one place is the same as another.

They move through halls that are bustling with activity, minutemen running and disembodied voices crackling over speakers. They don’t know it’s pointless, no amount of hunters in the field will matter or make a difference.

He thinks he says so, or perhaps he just imagines he does. Neither Mobius nor B-15 acknowledge him, at any rate; they only keep moving and after awhile, they arrive at the dormitories, where Loki has not been since the first day Mobius brought him here as an official TVA employee.

“Why are we here?” Loki asks, confused.

“So you can get a shower and a change of clothes,” Mobius says simply, “and then we can have some coffee and you can tell me what happened after the void.”

Loki sighs, and then nods, resisting the urge to insist that everything else could wait (until when?), because Mobius isn’t understanding the precariousness of the situation, but he knows it won’t do any good.

“Fine,” he says instead, giving up. The sooner he does what Mobius asks, the sooner Mobius will listen.

He’d not realized just how badly he needed that shower and change of clothes until he’s scrubbed the dirt and blood from his skin and allowed the hot water to beat over his sore muscles and rapidly-forming bruises. For lack of anything else to wear, he puts on a clean suit, fastening the cuffs firmly around his wrists and buttoning the collar up to his neck.

He’s sick of this outfit; he never wants to see it again but, without his magic, he has no other choice.

In the dormitory kitchen, Mobius is brewing a pot of coffee. He looks up when Loki walks in, and his mouth quirks in a half smile. “Better,” he says, “but you could still probably use some sleep and a meal.”

“Stop fussing,” Loki snaps, irritated with Mobius’s sudden desire to hover over him like a governess hovering over a petulant child who won’t eat his peas. “I hate coffee, by the way.”

“You’ve never had my coffee,” Mobius retorts, sounding unbothered. “Just sit down, okay? You still look like hell, is my point. When’s the last time anyone fussed over you, anyway?”

Loki makes a scoffing noise as he drops down into a chair at one of the small kitchen tables. “I’m sure my mother did at some point, I don’t remember.” Actually, he remembers very well that it was always his mother who looked after him when he was sick or tired or lonely, until he’d grown too old to allow himself to seek her out for comfort.

But he doesn’t want to think of his mother, who is lost to him and perhaps lost to the real Loki as well, the sacred timeline’s Loki, if enough time has progressed and Malekith has indeed run her through with a sword and left her bleeding out on the palace floor.

Loki shudders as he thinks of it, remembering the sight of his mother’s lifeless body projected onto a screen. He’d been helpless to stop it, utterly powerless, just as ultimately he’d been powerless to stop Sylvie.

His mother, dead. Sylvie, lost to him. The timeline destroyed - the end of everything. The weight of it all crashes over him; had he not already been sitting, the sheer despair of it would have brought him to his knees.

Loki drops his head into his hands instead, thinking back to Mobius’s words that first day: you were born to cause pain and suffering and death.

In retrospect, Loki knows that Mobius was merely fighting dirty, using whatever words necessary to break Loki down - the ends justify the means, and all that - but he wasn’t goddamn wrong.

How could Loki have ever believed, even for a second, that he could possibly change?

We write our own destinies now, he’d told that creepy little clock hologram, and she’d smirked, seen right through the words because they were rubbish and they both knew it.

Good luck with that.

Loki doesn’t realize he’s crying until Mobius sets down a steaming mug of coffee in front of him. He lifts his head and rubs tiredly at his tear-stained cheeks, unable to meet Mobius’s gaze as Mobius sits down across from him with his own mug.

“Here,” Mobius adds, reaching into his inside blazer pocket. He pulls out a slim, red candy stick wrapped in plastic and hands that to Loki as well.

Loki stares at it. “What is this?”

“Something better than grapes or nuts,” Mobius says dryly. “It’s a Twizzler. Popular Earth candy. I’d say don’t tell anyone I’ve stashed a bunch, but …” He trails off and shrugs, glancing around at the kitchen with forced amusement. “Doesn’t really matter anymore, does it?”

He pulls out a second Twizzler and unwraps the plastic, then bites into the candy. Loki watches him for a moment, and then imitates him. “Gross,” he says, after he’s taken a bite. It’s a very bland candy, with texture not unlike rubber. “Think I prefer grapes.”

“Well, maybe Twizzlers are an acquired taste,” says Mobius.

Loki finishes the Twizzler anyway, and then takes a sip of coffee. He does usually dislike coffee, but either he’s hungrier than he’d realized or Mobius has a gift, because this cup is actually quite good.

“Okay, now let’s go back to the beginning,” Mobius prompts, after a silence. He drums his fingertips against the table. “What happened? I’m assuming you were able to enchant the murder cloud?”

All of the words that had been spilling from Loki’s lips before, so desperate to be released, now get stuck somewhere in his throat. He wraps his hands around his mug and takes another sip of coffee, wondering idly how long it had been since he’d actually had something warm to drink. Or eat, for that matter. The train on Lamentis, perhaps. A moment ago, a lifetime ago.

“We did,” he finally says. Despite the coffee, a chill breaks out over his skin and he sets the mug down, choosing to fold his arms as if to fold into himself for warmth. “We made it past Alioth and found him - the one who’s responsible for all of this.”

Just like that, the words are no longer stuck. Loki pours out the entire story, starting from when he and Sylvie had crossed the threshold into the citadel and ending with his own tumble back through the tempad’s portal into the TVA.

But he omits the kiss, only mentioning that Sylvie had distracted him to get the upper hand. He’ll never speak of it - either that Sylvie had used his feelings for her in order to betray him, or that he’d fallen for it (of course he’d fallen for it; for a few seconds there, he’d let himself believe - but, it doesn’t matter, it wasn’t real, and there are bigger problems now).

“She closed the portal before I could get back through it,” Loki says. He notices that he’s twisting his fingers together so tightly that his knuckles are turning white. He forces himself to stop. “I can only imagine she finished the job after that because, well.” He barks a laugh that sounds, even to his own ears, broken and pathetic. He used to be so good at maintaining a cool, calm facade but it, like so many other things, had been steadily breaking apart, piece by piece. There is very little left to guard the scared little ice runt who trembles at the core.

“Look at the timeline,” he adds; he laughs again and rubs his eyes against a fresh wave of tears.

For a long time, neither of them say anything. Loki finishes his coffee and Mobius eats two more Twizzlers before another word is spoken.

“So we lost.” Mobius’s voice is hollow. “We lost before we could begin to fight.”

“I’m sorry.”

Mobius shrugs. He runs a hand over his short, gray hair before letting out a laugh of his own. “He Who Remains,” he repeats, more to himself than to Loki.

Loki allows a beat to pass. “We have to try to fix it, Mobius.” The only way to ease the weight of his guilt, Loki knows, is if he goes back and tries to make it right - or to die trying.

“How are we supposed to do that?” It’s Mobius’s turn to rub his eyes. His shoulders slump and for a moment, he looks very tired. Older. Loki studies him and wonders, fleetingly, if the real Mobius is someone’s father. “I don’t even know where to begin, Loki.”

“I might.” Loki straightens. Deep down, beneath the anguish, a seed of determination has taken hold and he focuses on that; a lifeline. “But you’ll need to trust me.”

#charlotte writes #follower celebration prompt series #loki series spoilers #loki spoilers #loki tv series spoilers #loki series positive #loki + mobius (platonic)#hurt/comfort #validatemepls #i was listening to the titanic soundtrack as i wrote this lmfao

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sakebytheriver · 2 years

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Tell me why I came into work today after a singular text from my boss saying our badges no longer work because they're switching the system only to then find out the higher ups knew this was going to happen days ago and they only told THREE(3) people who don't even come into the facility on the daily like the rest of us and then those three(3) people told exactly NO ONE that this switch was happening even though they have all the new badges already since fucking WEDNESDAY and it is currently SATURDAY. But I mean of course they couldn't have given us our badges on Thursday because they were having their 4th of July barbecue that we were not invited to and then they couldn't do it on Friday because they all got a half day and in fact most of them probably just called out instead of coming in at all, (ask me if my coworkers and I got a half day, the answer will not surprise you). And so now all of us are stuck having to go through so many different hoops just to get inside the building while we have exactly one(1) new badge that we have to pass from shift to shift and the next shift manager has to escort all of the staff from the shift before out to the door so they can get out of this goddamn building that treats it's emoyees like replacable cogs in a shitty machine even though what we do on the daily is take care of teenage moms and their babies. We bond with these kids, we bond with their babies and then one day after we are tired of being treated the way we get treated we just disappear from their lives causing even more pain and trauma on these kids who have already been rhroigh so much

No wonder we've been hemorrhaging employees recently jfc 🤦‍♀️

Literally one of my coworkers had worked at this job for 16 goddamn years and when he told them he was leaving, there was no attempt to try and get him to stay just a 'ok here's your last check don't let the door hit you on the way out'

The blood is in the water, the canary in the coal mine has died, the ocean has receeded and the tsunami is coming, but the ones I'm most worried about are the girls and their babies, because this facility was designed to help them, to give them schooling, childcare, therapy, community, healthcare, etc etc but all they get here is a bed and I have to sit there watching in real time as these girls fall through the cracks and management? They couldn't give two shits as long as it doesn't cut into their bottom line

#ignore me #rant #personal #job stuff #dont work in an american teenage group home unless you want to watch teenagers get abandoned

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deathbydarkelves · 3 years

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I decided to make playlists for Cathala and Tarinne plus explanations for why I chose each song because I entered one of those ADHD fugue states and if I didn't finish this task I would die

Anyway here are the two links (they're youtube playlists because I don't have spotify. I would obviously recommend using an adblocker if you're just gonna watch on youtube) and the explanations for each song are below the cut :) Each playlist is about an hour long.

For Tarinne’s:

1. Foggy Nights: I consider this her theme so putting it first as a sort of intro only makes sense.

2. Here’s a Health to the Company: I think this works as an example of her general disposition. She’s a people person, and always a fan of singing these sorts of songs in taverns, on ships, or what have you. It also kind of feels like a sendoff to soldiers, which I imagine symbolizes her joining the Sentinel Army and quickly thereafter fighting in the Third War.

3. Wartime Prayers: Somewhat self-explanatory, this is symbolizing her seeing war for the first time, but I also included it because the last line transitions SO WELL into the next song.

4. The Hollow: This song is an intro to an album I've never heard so I don't know the context, but I really love it because it sounds like someone praying to their deity and like I mean c'mon. Elune. Tarinne's praying to Elune to guide her through the war. Do I need to elabo-

5. Wave Walker: KILL DEATH MAIM AHAHAHAHA

6. Isil Elun’falo: Just a super rad fan-made night elf song that's basically "wow we sure do love Elune" said in twenty different ways for four and a half minutes. But it ROCKS and I LOVE it.

7. Chewing Cotton Wool: This song is about losing a loved one (I did have to check but yeah that's what it is) and I use it to symbolize Tarinne losing her mom during the war. The last line, which includes the song's title, I especially like. It's referring to how morticians (apparently) put cotton gauze in a corpse's throat and mouth to keep body fluids in and make the face look more natural. So there's a fun fact for you.

8. See U Soon (Song for Dad): Just a short lofi piece to rest a bit, and it was also chosen because the title's in reference to Tarinne growing closer to her dad after losing her mom. She still visits him at his leathers and furs shop in Stormwind fairly often, especially after dangerous adventures. She just wants to make sure he knows she's alright ;-;

9. No Lullaby: Right back into it with a song that I use to represent Tarinne's general feeling of not being able to go home because it's not there anymore. She's felt like this since the end of the Third War, but it's especially strong since the whole Teldrassil thing. But I like the ending, "who said you're on your own," because it contrasts the repeating of "alone" in the rest of the song. And it's kinda like "hey, listen, you're not the only one who feels like she can't go home." I mean that's probably how basically every single night elf feels right now skxnks

10. The Moss: This song juxtaposes classic fairy tales with scientific facts about the world and I love it to BITS. I'm using it here to represent both Tarinne's love for storytelling but also her sort of... part-time historian/archaeologist/conservator career.

11. Rasputin: I just associate this song with her for some reason and this was the best place to put it.

12. Electric Feel: Moving on to focus more on Tarinne's relationship with Cathala now. This is an extremely great and somewhat 😏 song that I also included because the electricity theme is appropriate because Cathala has lightning powers and y'know it's from Tarinne's perspective or whatever.

13. Bedroom Hymns: You know why this is here.

14. Movement: I can't talk about love songs without talking about Hozier, okay. This is just a nice, slower song to relax a bit with.

15. Never Let Me Go: I have an entire goddamn music video in my head with Cathala and Tarinne for this song and it’s very dramatic and emotional and I had to include this song or I’d die. Basically just listen to near the end of this song when she's repeating the title over and over, and imagine the two of them seeing each other at opposite ends of a battlefield after the dust settles and they rush towards each other and fall to their knees holding on as tightly as they can because they got separated early on and each thought the other was dead. Then you'll know how I feel when I listen to this song.

16. Nothing That Has Happened So Far Has Been Anything We Could Control: First of all I love the title, and second of all there's a big section in the middle (1:49 to 2:47) that I like to interpret as the two of them grappling with the fact that they're not really quite sure who or what they're fighting for anymore. Their people, yeah, but there's so many alliances and semi-permanent enemies and only-on-every-other-thursday-enemies all intertwined and the world is just so very confusing and they're trying to make the best of it. Elf school didn’t include international, interracial politics in its curriculum. It did however include how to properly plant trees, and AP calculus (this is a joke).

17. In Dreams: I like to imagine this song is something the two of them would say to each other, as a way of saying “even when everything we know is gone, even when the world ends, I will still be by your side. And if I’m not, don’t fear, for I will find you.” It makes a nice note to end on :)

For Cathala’s:

1. muse: Just a nice lofi intro to get us into things :) I don't see this song as her theme, like I do with Tarinne and the first song in her playlist, but I like it quite a bit. I don't actually really have a theme for Cathala yet, I'm currently going with a version of Way of the Monk from WoW's OST but I'm still looking for something better.

2. Frogs Singing: I included this because it's about just appreciating nature, which works because night elf and also mindfulness and meditation is a whole thing.

3. Tongues: This is a song about feeling distant from your peers which is like Cathala's whole existence! She's this weird mix of two cultures and ultimately she feels out of place regardless of where she is or who she's with. Also the theme with not understanding what people are saying works because the poor woman had to learn Pandaren from scratch and that shit ain't easy. I think blizz said somewhere probably that Common is just a language that EVERYONE knows inherently because Video Game but that's bullshit in my opinion. I'll allow spells that let you understand foreign languages to an extent (Comprehend Languages from D&D lets you understand the LITERAL meaning only, which I like), but every culture and species in the universe knowing Common is silly if you think about it for more than two seconds.

4. Kung Fu Fighting: I'm legally required to include this song. Also I prefer the Kung Fu Panda version, I'm sorry.

5. Harder Better Faster Stronger: I vicariously experience having a great work ethic through Cathala and that's why this song is here because she has 999 Determination and does Too Many push-ups every day or something idk. I was gonna say "every morning" but I have a headcanon that elves only need to sleep every couple of days (sort of a nod to "elves don't need to sleep at all" from D&D, and to explain why NIGHT elves are active at all hours of the day) so that doesn't work.

6. What's Up Danger: This song is Cathala's whole Vibe. Almost zero threat assessment skills in this woman's brain. If it can be punched, she will punch it.

7. Eye for an Eye: Fairly self-explanatory, it's a song about wanting revenge so... yeah. Checked that box. It was this or The Vengeful One by Disturbed but ultimately The Vengeful One's religious symbolism probably makes it fit better as a Tyrande theme lol ("I'm the hand of god, I'm the dark messiah." Did you mean: the Night Warrior)

8. Survivor: Cathala's survived a lot of shit and this could kinda be her making fun of herself for it because "Gods, man! Don't I deserve a break!"

9. Ashes: Really the reason I include this song is the last chunk (2:42 to the end) because holy shit. Listen, if I was gonna include a song with fire motifs, it was gonna be a somber one like this.

10. Into the West: This can kinda represent Cathala just trying to fucking breathe and recover from Teldrassil. Also works because I dunno it has stuff to do with the elves in LotR, I haven't seen those movies in a while. It sounds nice and is melancholy so I included it.

11. Like Real People Do: Cathala loves Tarinne a lot you guys have I ever menti-

12. Into the Wild: Tarinne changed Cathala's world for the better and she's super fucking grateful she has her by her side. Kinda goes without saying but you know.

13. Chasing the Moon: I have a vague music video in my head for this of them falling in love and it's very cute so there's that. Also it's in this specific spot because hey she may be deeply traumatized but she's still got a fair number of things/people in her life that make her happy so :)

14. Follow My Girl: I've got a theme going in my head that while Tarinne is fairly certain of her place in the world, Cathala is still trying to find hers. She outlived all her connections on Pandaria because Elf Lifespans(tm) and the only members of her family still alive are distant relatives she never knew very well.

15. Wish That You Were Here: This works both to represent Cathala on Pandaria feeling super homesick, and for more recently after Teldrassil. Either way, it's a message to her parents and sister.

16. Mr. Fear: She does her damnedest to hide it but she's absolutely terrified something like Teldrassil's gonna happen again! That fear drives her to do everything in her power to protect who and what she can. As long as they're not Forsaken, cause she's still got her biases, that compassion even extends across faction lines. She never really got the whole Alliance/Horde thing anyway. Innocent people shouldn't have to die, regardless of who or what they are.

17. Ordinary Day: Not to get super out there but I think this song works as symbolizing Cathala really trying to hold on to her faith in Elune, but ultimately feeling pretty abandoned. I mean she can clearly see Elune's influence everywhere. But Elune sure ain't doing Cathala any favors as far as she can tell! It also ends the whole playlist on maybe a bit of an uncertain/open-ended note, because this "losing faith" aspect is a new thing with her and will definitely be something she continues to struggle with for a while. On a related note, I should say Tarinne is still very much devout but she gets what Cathala's feeling and doesn't force anything on her, and vice versa. And Cathala wouldn't become atheist, the night elves aren't monotheistic and she still worships all the other deities, it's just specifically Elune she's a little :/ on.

#cathala #tarinne #oc playlist

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azulazenin · 4 years

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Fire Lilies

Summary: A flower it's just a flower anywhere in the world, but in the Fire Nation, the smallest gestures can hide bigger meanings. Even for the princess.

Paring: Azula x Ty Lee

A/N: This was originally written in portuguese for the tyzulaweek challenge, and posted on my wattpad account. I tried my best to translate it, so take it easy on me, english it's not my first language 😅

The first memories Azula had around fire lilies came from her early childhood, a time where everything was simpler, when her only concerns involved play with her friends and bully her brother. In that time, Azula was already a terror, a little adorable beast who liked to use the poor plants to train her fire aim, only for the pleasure of watching the immensity of black petals reduced to a pile of ashes. "They deserve it, they're not as pretty as the others." She always thought to herself, but that little act of rebellion didn't last long, Zuko exposed her bad behavior, and Ursa forbade her of keep on destroying the royal garden.

Not that Ursa was capable of stopping her daughter of doing what she likes, but anyway, the flowers did not suffer again in the hands of the princess, and the responsible for that was Ty Lee, by bringing a whole new meaning for the fire lilies in Azula's life.

— You wanna do what in my hair? – Azula was reluctant on letting someone touch her hair, especially the topknot.

— A wreath of flowers! – Ty Lee proclaimed in an adorable enthusiastic sound. — Please Zula, I already asked Mai and she didn't let me. I'm gonna do your hair just like mine, you're going to be so pretty! Well i'm not saying that you aren't already pretty, but…

— Ok! – the princess gave in, fearing that Ty Lee kept on talking all day long. — Just do the goddamn wreath.

Azula sat at the edge of the corridor stairway that connected all the courtyards in the palace, Ty Lee one step above her. With half hundred fire lilies, the little acrobat worked her way through the princess' dark hair, arranging the flowers into a arc to keep bangs away from the eyes and a cascade down a long braid. When finished, Ty Lee was so proud of her job she almost cry out of happiness.

— See? I told you it was going to be gorgeous! – she spoke between leaps, crushing Azula into a hug and giving little kisses across her face.

Azula felt her cheeks burning red and butterflies in the pit of her stomach. Her body used to react like this when she was angry, but she never had those two symptoms at the same time before, and never accompanied by that itch on the left side of her chest. Definitely, it wasn't anger what she was feeling.

— Y-yeah sure, it's not as bad as I thought it would be. – Azula babbled when she saw her reflection through the water of the fountain and stepped away from her friend, desperately trying to get rid of those scary unknown emotions.

But she didn't managed to do it, not that day, nor the days ahead of her. Azula was yet to young to understand that weird feeling close to her heart, to small to know why she always revive it whenever she was close to Ty Lee or fire lilies. But eventually she learned to disguise, to ignore the cold in her belly and sent away the redness of her face, though it was really difficult to pretend her heart wasn't beating like crazy when her friend was close with flowers on hands or asked to touch her hair.

Years later, when Azula was in her early teenage years, her father entrusted her with the biggest mission of her life, and the princess knew very well she could only count on two people to help her. All she had to do was ask, the authority of her title would do the rest, as it was the case with Mai in Omashu, but she didn't want the things to be like that with Ty Lee too. After spending such a long time away from her friend, Azula needed to know if the fire lilies had on Ty Lee the same effect they had on her.

— What an exquisite performance. – Azula said when she entered dressing room after the show, placing the bouquet of black flowers on the table. — I can't wait to see how you'll top yourself tomorrow.

Azula faced the acrobat through the mirror, trying to study her reaction, but apparently, the princess' ability of reading other people's emotions was useless on Ty Lee, 'cause she ended up losing herself in other details. There was no deny that her friend was beautiful, the brown hair and that pair of gray eyes might not be such a big deal in other countries, but in the Fire Nation, it turned her beauty in something rather rare. A woman like that, in the non humble Azula's opinion, should be on a palace surrounded by servents tending to her needs, not in a filth circus at the ends of the world.

— I'm sorry Azula, but unfortunately it won't be a show tomorrow. – Ty Lee responded, awakening the princess out of her trance.

— Really? – the surprise was genuine, but Azula tried hard to pretend otherwise. Not even the conquering of Ba Sing Se could make her so happy as the realization that Ty Lee somehow corresponded those weird feelings.

— Yes, I wanna join you in your mission.

The next time Azula was close to Ty Lee and fire lilies at the same time, the circumstances weren't the best ones. The war was over and lost, her throne usurped by her brother, her facilities were a room that could easily be taking by a cell. Her only company was Zuko – when his duties as Fire Lord allowd him to remember he had a sister – the psychiatric hospital team, and of course, her little acrobat.

Sometimes, Azula was still tempted to hit Ty Lee with lightning as a punishment for her betrayal, but when she stop to think clearly, she comes to realize that she can't have the luxury of cutting from her life the few people that remain.

— Happy birthday, Zula. – Ty Lee wished during one of her weekly visits, handing to the princess a single fire lily through the bars. — I would've bring an entire bouquet, but the doctors didn't allow.

Azula held the freshly harvested flower, breathing the smell that brought back the memories from a childhood that seems to have been lived ages ago. She felt like crying, wishing to be a kid again. If she could go back time, she would've been nicer to Ty Lee, and wouldn't pretend she didn't like when her friend adorned her hair with a wreath of flowers.

— Thank you, Ty. – she said, holding against her chest the flower she would keep until the petals turnes to dust. — Come closer, I wanna tell you a secret.

There was no secret, not anymore at least. There were no expectations to be met nor goals to achieve, only a birth title that no longer stands for anything. There was nothing to hide, and as ironic as it could sound, it was behind those bars that Azula was finally free to do what she spend years wanting to do.

When Ty Lee approached her painted face with the Kyoshi Warriors colors, Azula did not pity to ruin the perfect makeup by sealing their lips with a kiss. Ty Lee frozed for a second, but she soon find out there was no escaping from what she too desired and kissed the princess back until she lost her breath.

— When I leave this place… – Azula said with a determined expression. — I will kiss you every single day of my life.

#tyzula #atla tylee #ty lee x azula #atla azula #princess azula #fire nation

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an-american-whovian · 4 years

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- An American Whovian Reviews: 'Revolution of the Daleks' by Chris Shitnall.

• The Story Thus Far.

When we last left the Doctor she was partaking in one of the WORST Doctor Who episodes of all time. Turns out she's had, like, a billion regenerations -- and started off as a cute lil' black girl who got experimented on by some crazy TimeLord lady. Makes about as much sense as an asshole on my elbow.

I digress, after that whole REVEAL -- the Doctor is arrested by everyone's favorite space rhinos and sent to space jail much like Rick Sanchez at the end of 'Rick & Morty' season 2.

(Just not as good.)

• Recap.

The story starts off with a reminder of an even shittier story 'Resolution' in which the Doctor and "Fam'" defeat a Dalek with spare parts from a microwave. (Fuck you, Chibnall.)

Anyways, back to now: some people have the leftovers of that one Dalek in some facility. This one dude is tasked with transporting it and stops fer a hot cup of coffee -- which he chugs. (That's a thing.) Shortly thereafter, turns out he got drugged by the barista and she's, like, "Bitch, this is my truck now."

• I Loved that Show.

Curtis from 'Misfits' and Mr. Big from 'Sex & the City' meet up with some lady in which he hired some folks to "roleplay" as rioters. (I can't make this up.) He's, like, "Check this out -- I made these robots that can subdue rioters." (Where was he during the attack on the Capitol!?) Actually, Curtis from 'Misfits' supposedly made them from scratch.

Somewhere Davros is rolling in his chair.

• Political Disintrigue.

Mr. Big and the lady are in cahoots. I don't care.

• Elsewhere.

The Doctor is in jail serving her sentence and eating space brownies. She's got a Weeping Angel, Sycorax, Ood l and the Pting as neighbors. (Everyone loves call backs.) Laying on her cot she does her best quirky Matt Smith impersonation when she here's a-knocking.

WHO COULD IT BE!?

• Elsewhere, again.

We cut to the Fam' back on Earth. Yaz is living in a house that's a TARDIS in disguise; whilst Graham and Ryan could care less about what happened to the Doctor. They're, like, "Yaz, you gotta move on. However, someone leaked that footage of the roleplaying rioters versus a Dalek on DailyMotion -- so we should do something about that."

The lady and Mr. Big meet up, again, this time in some forest -- fer more expository conversation. I still can't be bothered.

Later, the Fam' just tracks down Mr. Big, like, it's nothing. Fortunately fer him, he has has guards -- and they shoo off the Fam'.

Ugh.

• Slammer Buddies.

The Doctor sees a Silence and then, say wha'!? Captain Jack is there to break he Doctor out with some doohickey he snuck up his ass. Turns out it's a giant hamster bubble that let's them break out of a MAXIMUM SECURITY SPACE JAIL! I hate this shit . . .

It's great to see Captain Jack, again, but this isn't worth it.

Only 18 minutes has passed. Fuck me.

• Exposition Earl.

Curtis from 'Misfits' is talking to Mr. Big and he's, like, "Dude, did you know there's, like, DNA samples inside that old casing you gave me!? Well, I took the time to clone it! I call it Squiggly."

Curtis from 'Misfits' cloned a Dalek. Fuuuuuuck.

Mr. Big is, like, "Yo, get that abomination out of my face and burn it!" -- which Curtis from 'Misfits' hesitantly obliges. Psyche! Squiggly takes mind control over Curtis from 'Misfits'. Who didn't see that coming!?

• Elsewhere: Part 3.

The Doctor and Captain Jack SOMEHOW just get back to the TARDIS like it's nothing. Fer some reason the Doctor is a bit of a jerk to Jack eventhough he just got her ungrateful ass out of Space Prison.

She's, like, "I gotta find my REAL friends." and meets back up with the Fam'. Yaz gets wet and Jack flirts with Graham. Turns out the Doctor has been gone fer a little less than a year. Cool. They get straight to the point and are, like, "Daleks are back. You know, the same aliens that tried to conquer Earth in series 2 and 4. Oh, no one remembers that?"

Fuck you, Chibnall.

• Hilarity ensues.

Squiggly somehow has a giant facility with other Dalek clones in Japan. Where the fuck did they come from!? Who knows -- and who cares.

The Doctor confronts Mr. Big and he's, like, "I'm 3D printing Dalek casings. It's cool, tho'. There's nothing inside of them. It's not, like, there's a facility in Osaka, Japan with a bunch of Dalek clones waiting to fill these up.

Speaking of which, Yaz and Jack are in Japan and they have a cringey convo about life with the Doctor. Rose and Sarah Jane's talk in 'School Reunion' this is not.

There's still 40 minutes to go.

After their heart to heart -- Yaz still has the audacity to insult Jack. She's fierce!

Anyways, guess what they find!? GUESS WHAT THEY FUCKING FIND!? The Dalek clone farm. Like, we weren't already shown this before. They even do a "Dun-Dun-Dun!" reveal fer this shit.

FUCK YOU, CHIBNALL.

• Facepalm.

Fer reasons unbeknownst to me the Doctor takes Mr. Big along to Japan -- you know, fer reasons. All the while, we cut to scenes of that one lady introducing Daleks to the public. No one still remembers series 2 and 4 -- or any other time Daleks have been on Earth.

At the same time, Jack and Yaz get attacked by a bunch of other Squigglies and I'm getting mad hentai vibes.

The Doctor, still back on the TARDIS, has a half hearted conversation with Ryan and tells hims it's, "Four minutes to Osaka" -- eventhough there's 50+ years of the TARDIS landing places INSTANTENOUSLY!

FUCK.

YOU.

CHIBNALL.

Ryan is, like, "Yea, I kinda prefer being back home than traveling in the TARDIS and seeing all of time and space. By the way, how'd 'The Timeless Children' go fer you?"

The Doctor is basically, like, "The less said about that -- the better." I tend to fucking agree.

Four minutes are up and Jack has and orgasm when he sees the TARDIS materialize eventhough he was just on it not too long ago.

• Git 'er Done.

Everyone's reunited along with Mr. Big as they confront mind controlled Curtis from 'Misfits'. We get more exposition as to how these Squigglies were cloned and what they eat. The big revelation is that they eat humans -- and I still can't be bothered to care.

Somehow the cloned Squigglies can teleport to those empty Dalek casings and proceed to wreck havoc to the masses. I will NEVER grow tired of Daleks massacaring people. "EXTERMINATE!"

(I finally have a non ironic smile on my face.)

Squiggly kills Curtis from 'Misfits' and the only one to give a shit is Mr. Big. The Doctor tries her best at a, "I am the Doctor and I save people!" speech which falls flat. She's got a plan, tho'!

She beeps up real Daleks -- and she's, like, "These REAL Daleks are gonna kill those fake Daleks! It's okay if they come -- fer REASONS they wont kill any humans. Just these fake Daleks. The story demands it."

• Invasion of the Dalek Snatchers.

We finally get the revolution in "Revolution of the Daleks". The real Daleks are, like, "Y'all, mother fuckers, are impure!" All the while, Mr. Big is, like, "I like these real Daleks. I wanna be friends with them -- you know, 'cause I'm a bad guy. Take me to yer leader." (That last bit was a direct quote.)

The boys leave the girls behind to go destroy the Dalek ship. We get some more poorly written dialogue.

Mr. Big tells the real Daleks about the Doctor -- which they should've been already privy to. Luckily, Jack informs the Doctor about Mr. big's treacherous ways and she's got another trick up her sleeve! All the while, Jack and the boys blow up the Dalek ship and the Doctor reveals her ruse. She sucked the Daleks into the spare TARDIS that Yaz was living in and has it collapse on itself.

Aren't TARDIS kind of, like, living creatures? They've been known to have a consciousness. Whatever.

• The Home Stretch.

Fer REASONS Mr. Big is considered a hero. Captain Jack is, like, "I'm out and I'm gonna go find my Torchwood friends. Fuck you guys."

Ryan is, like, "Yea, no more trips fer me either. I wanna stay home and play football with me mates and eat fish and chips." Graham agrees, too. So it's just Yaz and the Doctor now. I'm excited fer that potential porn parody.

Then we get a call back to 'The Girl Who Fell to Earth' and Ryan trying to ride a bike. I forgot that was a thing. They babble about facing off alien threats on Earth and fer other REASONS Grace shows up a, like, a fucking Jedi Force Ghost. 😂😭🤤

• The Good, the Bad and the Fugly.

The best I can say about this story is that Doctor Who, aesthetically, has never looked better. The Daleks inside and out were REALLY well done; and I fucking love the look of the TARDIS traveling through the time vortex. Unfortunately, that's it about it.

This was god awful. Maybe in time I can rewatch this in a it's so bad it's good capacity; but I won't be doing that any time soon. Chibnall has lost his goddamn mind.

Why is everyone so mean to Captain Jack!? I don't fucking get it. Graham and Ryan wanting to leave the TARDIS just 'cause they're, like, "Meh. It's been done.? Why is Mr. Big in this, at all!? Also, somebody fire that composer! I'm tired of his ambient noises.

Seriously, this was bad.

Zero stars.

#an american whovian #doctor who #dw #whovian #review #nuwho #the thirteenth doctor #jodie whitaker #chris chibnall #revolution of the daleks #yaz #ryan #graham #daleks #chris noth #jack robinson #misfits

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fortunatelyhauntedblackcherry · 4 years

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Moonshine - A Beetlejuice Fanfiction 08

Warning: ANGST. With capital letters. So much trauma, anger, crying and death you guys. It was so hard for me to write, it was emotionally challenging, so it might do the same to some of you by reading it. There's also swearing in it.

Beetlejuice floated right through the wall between Rei's and Ari's room. He stretched his back with closed eyes and a huge smile, his bones cracking like dry branches in the wind.

- Oh babes you couldn't possibly imagine how happy I am right now! I heard a genuine scream coming my way! Ah man I haven't heard any of those in a decade, it sounded so... - Beetlejuice opened his eyes. The room was almost empty, only Sirius was inside. Couple of sewing patters were scattered on the floor, next to the already cut-out parts of a cornflower blue dress. BJ blinked at Ari's laptop; the podcast she was listening to has been stopped. - ...kinky. - he finished his sentence in a lowered voice.

He suddenly turned his head to the open window as he realized that a muffled voice came from outside. Sirius scuffled for a bit when he heard the noise and growled when Beetlejuice moved past him. The demon climbed out to the roof, following the noises. Ari was sitting at the farthest end, wrapped in an oversized dark green knitted cardigan. Beetlejuice almost called out to her, scolding her for disappearing when he had such great news but he stopped himself when he realized what the voices were. Ari was crying.

- Babes? - asked Beetlejuice, as he lowered his raspy voice. - What's going on? - Ari quickly turned to the demon's voice's direction. She had a used tissue in her hand. She quickly tried to cover her face with her hair but Beetlejuice saw what she was hiding. Her emerald eyes were all puffy and red, her nose was swollen and full-blooded too, and her lips looked like she didn't drink any water in a week. Her voice was cracking a bit as she started talking.

- Oh, it's nothing, Bug, just... - she beckoned with her hand. Beetlejuice heard as she tried to pull herself together. She let out a huge breath. - ...it's just my mental health issues. They're acting up again. - Beetlejuice stepped next to her as she cleared her throat. - Just gimme a sec, I'll be alright and you can tell me what you have done to my poor sister.

- Nonono, there's something wrong here. - he sat down next to Ari. Her legs were pulled close to her chest as she has enclasped them. She put her chin on her knees, showing as little of her face as she could. - You had a bad day last week when your anxiety was thriving. This is not like that. - Ari smiled lightly. Her wet eyelashes juddered, which made them glisten in the beams of moonlight.

- You really got to know me in the past couple weeks, didn't you?

- Yeah, that... and you also made me sit through 13 episodes of Therapy, which is an awful series by the way, so I'm basically a mind-scientist now. - Ari snorted while she let out a small, sad laugh. - So tell Doctor B, what's going on here, patient number one? - Ari let go of her knees and huffed out. She let her legs dangle off of the roof. She didn't look at Beetlejuice's direction, she just watched the darkness pass by under her feet.

- I... I got to know why do I hear you.

Beetlejuice scrowled and shook his head.

- I'm not following, please explain why does that makes you sad? I thought you wanted to know... - he stopped as Ari rubbed her temples and sighed. She kept her eyes closed while she was talking.

- B., of course I wanted to know! I wanna help, don't think otherwise, it's just... - she clenched her jaw, swallowed her saliva then continued. - The memories. They make me so goddamn angry and sad at the same time.

- I don't get it. - Beetlejuice sounded clueless. He didn't really know what she was talking about. As Ari clicked with her tongue, Beetlejuice moved closer to her and leaned even closer to her ear. His voice was as raspy as always, but he sounded much more sweet and kind. Almost gentle. - Maybe... Talking will help. I don't know, Dr. Phil says it does a lot. - Ari opened her eyes and breathed out. Her breath was jerky.

- The podcast I was listening to, you know, the one about the extraspecial demons, well... - Beetlejuice looked down at Ari's hands. She was sinking her nails into her fingertips. She must have been doing this for at least an hour, since some already left dark purple marks on her fingerpads. Beetlejuice put his hand over Ari's. The cold air made the girl shiver a bit but it also made her stop. - The show started with the hosts talking about how they invited a parapsychologist into the show so he could tell the audience interesting things about demons generally before they start to talk about the different types. So the guy said really interesting stuff, hands down, it really was good, but then he said that after a certain type of trauma, some people develop a weird... "ability". - she used her hands to emphasize the word then let them fall onto her lap again. She sighed. - Do you want to hear the long story of why do I hear you, or the short version? - Beetlejuice flinched his eyes.

- I prefer long and thick things so give it to me, baby. - Ari didn't react to his joke. She'd didn't even smile. She looked like she was was collecting her strength. After a couple minutes of silence, she finally started to speak.

- Bug, have you ever seen how my abdomen looks?

That was a sudden question.

- No? - he said in a kind of shy voice. He didn't wanna upset her more. She seemed just as miserable as furious. - You said no croptops until it's at least 30 °C... Why? - Ari breathed in and layed a bit back. She started to roll her olive t-shirt up on her belly.

Beetlejuice gasped and held his palm before his mouth. The tips of his hair started to turn into red and purple at the same time.

- Who... Who did that to you?!? - Beetlejuice held his hand above the three scars that Ari had on her abdomen. They were shapeless, with rigged edges and at least 5 centimeters long each.

- They've been with me since I was 17. - she sniffled a bit as she let her shirt down. She pulled one of her knees close to her chest again, and put her elbow up on it. - Don't worry, I already got used to them. I don't love them, but they're stuck with me so... - she sighed and look at Beetlejuice's direction. - You sure you wanna hear this story? I might cry. I might get furious and start screaming. You wouldn't like either.

- It's true that nothing is sexier than laughing and screaming of terror, but I'd surely get hard, seeing you deranged with anger. - Ari snorted at the demon's arousing voice. He actually just tried to cover up the fact that all he wanted was to kill whoever did that, and then hug the girl tight.

- Get ready for a love story that is basically horror at best... The kind where the hero still... Gets broken in the end. - she sighed and looked up at the stars. - This fucked up story starts half a year before I got my scars. I started dating a guy named... - she gulped and closed her eyes. - Matthias. - she opened her eyes with a sigh. - Gods, I hate to say his name out loud. It makes me wanna gag. It was a teenage love, I didn't see or didn't want to see his faults and I totally fell head over feet for him. You know what I'm talking about, right?

- Totally. - he had no clue.

- So you know, it was fun in the beginning. He was older than me, so nice and funny. He escorted me basically everywhere, and it just felt so good to be with him. - she sighed. - I thought that he was just worried when he told me I shouldn't go to a party with my friends cause "the world is filled with creeps", but later I realized that he was just simply possessive. - she sighed, sounding annoyed, and looked straight into the darkness of the night. - I started feeling anxious because of him when he started to tell me where could I go and what could I wear. "That's too showing, you can show that much skin only to me!" - she said in a mimicking voice. Then her face turned so dark so quickly. - He told me that if I wasn't acting nice, or behave, or do exactly as he says, that would make him look bad before his friends and a good girlfriend wouldn't want that. Shit, man, we've been together for 4 months only but I was so unstable because of him and massive bullying in school that I turned out to be an anxious wreck. - she clicked her tongue, got up and started to walk up and down, her bare feet tapping on the roof. - We went out one day, and during our "date" he repeatedly told me how I was not smart enough, pretty enough, ENOUGH, and he was with me just because no one else would want me. After he dropped me off at home, I started crying my heart out to my mom. - her eyes got teary again, but there was so much anger in her voice. - Gods she's such a wonderful woman. She taught me how to be brave, how to be strong enough to be myself. And at that moment she made me realize how I'm starting to lose my badass, weird but awesome self because of this stupid cabrón! - she kicked the air. Her breathing was so fast, and her body was radiating so much heat it could almost warm Beetlejuice up. She breathed out with a sigh. - Shit, I must look like a crazy person. Excuse me. I sometimes use spanish words when I'm experiencing a strong feeling. Multilingual things. Cabrón means...

- Pendejo, fucker, asshole, I know. - that sudden cut-in brought Ari down back to earth quickly. She knitted her eyebrows. - I had an argentinian girlfriend who taught me a bit spanish. I can cuss just perfectly. - he tried to sound calm. He really did. But oh boy he was not. The way the emotions changed on Ari's face made him remember some of his past traumas, and that made him feel a lot of different things at the same time. And he was also furious at this asshole of an ex.

Ari sat down again. She breathed out to calm herself down. After a minute of frozen silence, the demon started to talk.

- This whole thing is fucked up, you know. The whole being told what to do and where to go and how to look... - said Beetlejuice in a low manner. His raspy voice sounded... sad? He cleared his throat, even though, being dead, he didn't have to, it just felt good. - I'll totally regret this, but since we're doing this overly honest heartfelt shit that I normally hate, and I'm very much irritated by it, let me tell ya... - he looked at Ari as his hair turned more purple. - I can relate to you. My mother did the same shit to me. She made me feel worthless, a piece of shit that didn't deserve any love. - he sighed and looked up at the moon. He chuckled a bit, his voice went back from soft to normal quickly. - Dear God slash Satan, your emotional bullshit is contagious, Ari. I gotta stop hanging out with you.

Ari smiled lightly.

- You couldn't. You love chilling with me. - the demon scretched his stubbles and let out a tiny laugh.

- True. I'm hooked on that fine ass of yours. - Ari laughed a bit. She looked where Beetlejuice's voice came from previously, and held out her hands.

- You know, I wouldn't really feel it, it won't exactly be a real hug, but if you want to... - Beetlejuice didn't let this opportunity go, he basically jumped into Ari's embrace instantly. He almost fell over her body, and he couldn't really wrap his hands around her, but being this close felt so good. Ari's body radiated so much heat and hearing her heart pitter-patter inside her chest made him forget how she didn't even see him. They both smiled. - Thanks for telling me a bit about your origin story. I know it's hard to talk about these kind of shits.

Beetlejuice let Ari go and sit back a bit, still staying close to the girl. She let her hands down.

- I'm only this honest with you cause you told shit to me too. - the demon lowered his raspy voice. - But if you tell anyone about my problems, even though we are bffffs forever, I'll skewer you like a pig. Understood? - Ari swallowed and blinked nervously while nodding. Beetlejuice continued like he didn't say anything threatening. - Anyway, I still don't know why do you hear me. Are we getting there soon? - Ari nodded again and rubbed her cheek.

- Yeah, sure, buckle up for the worse part of the ride, buddy. - she cleared her throat. - When the next day I went over to his place to break up with him and to tell him that I belong to no one, and he doesn't have the right to tell me what to do, he hit me. He slapped me so hard that my cheek ripped up a bit. - she pulled her hair back a bit, revealing a tiny scar on her left cheekbone. - The next day he called me, told me that he's sorry and he didn't want to hurt me. I hang up on him quickly and got a new number the same day. I wanted him gone. But it didn't take him much time to get my new number. He called me a thousand times. But since I didn't answer, he started to follow me. Watching from the street while I was at school. Creeping around the studio I sang at. - she sniffled as her eyes started to get teary, but she quickly wiped them with the sleeve of her cardigan - You know, I called the cops. I told them everything. And they told me they couldn't do anything until he hurts me. - she chuckled in an annoyed way. She fuckin chuckled. - They didn't have to wait for that for so long.

- WHAT?! - shouted Beetlejuice which made Ari jump a bit. He jumped up in anger, the tips of his hair shining in bright red. - THOSE GUYS SHOULD TAKE CARE OF PEOPLE, NOT TELL THEM TO "GET FUCKIN HURT THEN WE'LL TALK"?!? - he squatted down next to Ari. - Let me guess, that son of a bitch ex of yours caused those fuckin scars?!?

-...yes... - said Ari with bated breath. Beetlejuice scraffed his fluffy hair and unshaven face. - I was walking home late from a rehearsal, mom was at work, and when I was already at our street, he stepped up to me out of nowhere, started to tell me how he's gonna change and after I pushed him, and told him to leave me alone since I fuckin hate him and I don't belong to him... He said that if I don't wanna belong to him, then I'll belong to no-one. And he... - tears started running down her cheeks. - Stabbed me. Again. And again.

- THIS... MOTHER FUCKER... - he bit his fist and started to babble. - I mean yeah sure I kinda get it I'm a bit possessive too, also creepy, but I'm pretty sure he could get an another hot goth chick and...

- HE KILLED ME, MAN! - screamed Ari into the abyss. Beetlejuice froze in his movement.

- W...What? - Ari sat still, hands covering her mouth. Beetlejuice squatted down next to her again. - Babes did I hear that right? - she shut her eyes and sighed. She let her hands go and stared down from the roof.

- Yes. - she said. Her voice was so weak. - A neighbor saw what happened and called the ambulance. I got rushed into hospital and... I went under surgery. They had to remove a part of my intestines asap... They got damaged from the stabs... And while I was knocked out... My heart decided to give up on me. And I died.

Beetlejuice sat down at the brim of the roof. He was shocked.

- I... suppose that's why you have a fixation with death? - he asked calmly. Ari shrugged and lifted her hands up.

- Partly... Other than the fact I was born on Halloween so it's basically in my blood... I think what really caused my obsession is that I remember every goddamn second of being dead. I remember seeing my body, covered in blood, and as I realized what was going on, I started panicking about how much more I wanted to do and how young I was to die. - she sighed with a light, not so real smile. She sounded so damaged. The demon could hear the pain in her voice. - 🎶And so, being young and dipt in folly, I fell in love with melancholy.🎶 - she looked at Beetlejuice's direction after she wiped her tears off with a tissue. - I was dead for 4 minutes before they brought me back. More or less. Looks like that's why I hear you. Many folks who die and come back develop this... "ability" to see or hear creatures from other dimensions. My special power is to hear demons, as it turns out. - she looked at the demon's direction. - Good for you I winded up in this house.

- I'm so happy about that. I couldn't ask for a better breather partner in crime in my dreams. - Ari heard in his voice that he was smiling. Oh if she could see his lightpink hairtips too... - What happened after? - asked Beetlejuice. Ari lifted her eyebrows a bit. - I mean, I hope the fucker got what he deserved and someone killed him. - Ari bit his lips in frustration, and sighed.

- Not exactly... At least he didn't got what I think he would have deserved. - she stretched out her legs. - While I was in the hospital for 8 months, on full-time mental and physical therapy by the way, I filed a report against him and got him arrested. I was so relieved... Then I heard he only got 3 years. - she fumbled through her hair. - Seriously, he fuckin put someone in intensive care for months and all he got was a couple of years then adiós, go on your fuckin way my man?! - she let out an angry growl. - Just because, and I quote, "he was young and could have a bright future", yes, that's what the jury said... - she huffed. - But the good thing is, right after he got out, he violated the restraining order that I got against him. He came to the house that Sofi, Rei, my mom and I lived in. You know, they moved in with us after I got out of the hospital because... For the first 5 or six months, I was afraid to go out without company. So my sisters helped a lot. They even kind of made me forget how my friends left me, because "I was acting overdramatic and why couldn't I just forget and be happy". - Beetlejuice raised his eyebrows and shook his head.

- The fuck is wrong with people... - Ari let out an annoyed chuckle.

- Oh my man, most of them are awful fellas. After this, I didn't even care that I missed my prom. - she swallowed her saliva and leaned back so she could gaze the stars. - So yeah, back to the subject, that pendejo came to our house in the middle of the night and demanded my mom to take him to me cause he wanted to say sorry because he missed me so much and wanted us to start a new chapter. - Ari rubbed her temples. - The police acted quickly this time and put him into jail for 3 more years. - she sighed. - Not that I think that's enough... But it was enough for us to find a new home and move away from him, as far as we could.

Beetlejuice waddled closer to her, and layed down as well.

- You know what's the weirdest thing about you, scarecrow? - Ari chuckled.

- Besides the fact that my best buddy is a demon? - BJ laughed a bit too. - No idea, Bug.

- That you're so full of life, and so goddamn annoyingly positive. If you wouldn't tell me, I wouldn't know you had so much shit to deal with. - Ari put her hands up in the air while shrugging.

- Look, I already know how does it feel to die. By the time I turned 19, I decided I'd try how does it feel to be alive. And when I'm not a mess, oh boy, it's so much fun! - Beetlejuice turned to his side and looked at the girl.

- You’re not a mess babes, you’re a... spicy disaster! - Ari laughed. It was so nice to hear that adorable laugh again. BJ looked straight into her emerald eyes that were gleaming in the moonlight. - You know, doll, I'm really sorry for creeping around. If I would've known, I... - he shut up as Ari gestured with her hand.

- You didn't know. It's alright. I hate being followed, but you're so goddamn chatty that it doesn't feel creepy at all. Plus, you're not human, which makes me more comfortable. It's somehow nice to have you weirdo around.

For a couple of minutes, they just laid there, both watching the stars. It was so peaceful, but something still bugged Beetlejuice and he just couldn't let it go.

- Hey, babes? - Ari turned her head to his direction.

- Yeah?

- If he ever finds you, can I kill your ex-boyfriend?

#alex brightman #beetlegeuse #beetlejuice #beetlejuice fanfiction #beetlejuice oc #beetlejuice the musical #fanfic #fanfiction #lawrence beetlejuice shoggoth #musical!beetlejuice #beetlejuice broadway

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motleyfuckingcruee · 5 years

Text

Rocket Queen

0.1: The Beginning

Henley's P.O.V

It's another day in this hell hole. I'll be completely honest, I deeply miss Los Angeles. I lived there for three years until my parents decided to uproot our lives entirely and move here to Seattle. I'm not happy with this at all. I miss my best friend, Athena Bass. I was incredibly close with her and her brother Thomas Bass. Or as the world knows him, Tommy Lee.

I met Tommy first. He was sitting on his porch, playing a guitar as loudly as he could. It's like he wanted to show off to everyone that he had a guitar. He wasn't that good, but he was practicing. He looked up as I slammed the car door. My parents had promised me and my little brother Nico that we wouldn't move anymore. Little did we know then, that was a lie. Anyways, Tommy walked over to me as I grabbed some boxes from the back of the minivan. I remember being shocked with how tall he was. I nearly had to look all the way up to see his eyes. He had this adorable smile that was contagious.

"Need any help?" He asked, a grin on his face.

I was in a very bad mood, so I ended up snapping at him. "I'm perfectly fine, now fuck off."

Luckily, my parents and Nico were inside, so I wouldn't get scolded for using that language. I was only thirteen then. The friendship grew after that. We hung out everyday, then when I went to school, I met Athena who's my age.

It would be lie if I said I didn't have a crush on Tommy. He was two years older than me, and a very affectionate best friend. Me being young and naïve, thought he was flirting with me. I never confessed my feelings and before I knew it, him and his band, Motley Crue, were off on tour. I gave up on the dream that Tommy would ever look at me the way I did at him. He calls every day, even when he's super busy. He keeps asking if I could come out and visit him, but I doubt my parents would allow me to do that. I asked, and they shot down the idea immediately. They never liked Tommy, but they loved Athena. I was thinking I could try to convince them to let me go visit her, then we could go see Tommy in his new apartment. The lucky bastard.

I've been in Seattle for only four months. In those four months, as Nico would say, I had lost my goddamn mind. I'm constantly sneaking out late at night when I know my parents are asleep. I've mastered the ways of sneaking out of my bedroom window and shimmying down the drainpipe. I usually get one of my new best friends, Madeline Love, and we go to one of the dingy bars that we can find.

She's probably the coolest person I know, other than Tommy and Athena. She's the only one that knows where I go every night. There's two other people in our small friend group; Jake Love, Madeline's brother, and Evangeline, or Eva for short. Jake is a real sweetheart. He's the first guy I talked to when I arrived in Seattle. Well, he approached me. He said I looked lonely, which I was.

Eva is sweet too, just very dramatic at times. This one time, I accidentally slapped her arm and she acted like I punched her in the nose. She was mad at me for two days straight. The whole situation gave me a huge headache. We all laugh about it now. The more she got comfortable with me, the more she calmed down with the dramatics.

"Henley!" Eva nearly yells, causing a few nosy teenagers to look in our direction.

I glare at them before turning to Eva. "Yeah?"

"You should come over tonight! Mads and I were talking about having a sleepover at her place, and you know it's not the same without you!"

I smile at her. That sounds fun, but Madeline and I already had plans. I look around the crowded lunchroom. Three and half more hours and I can finally go get ready for our big night on the town. I'm fucking excited. "Sorry, I can't tonight. What about tomorrow?"

"That works too! We could go shopping and all that." Eva takes a sip of whatever organic drink she bought overly priced. She's into that hipster shit where she only eats and drinks 'organic' things. I think it's just a waste of money, but whatever.

Madeline smiles, pushing her light brown hair behind her ear. "Actually tomorrow works better anyway."

Eva's smile doesn't falter. Madeline and I know that if she knew we were hanging out together without her, she'd have a hissy fit. Eva just isn't cut out for what we do. I love the girl, but if any of our parents were suspicious about what we were doing, she'd crack under pressure and tell them immediately. Then we'd all be fucked. My parents would never let me out of the house again.

"Okay so we'll all meet up at your place tomorrow at like five?"

"That works," Madeline responds, looking as Jake finally sat down.

His sandy hair is falling in his face, making him look like he just rolled out of bed.

"Why're you so late?" I ask.

His face turns red as he looks down at the food he won't eat. "I-uh-fell asleep in class and no one woke me up. I was almost locked in the classroom."

I laugh, shaking my head. "The classrooms lock from the inside. All you had to do was open the door."

Jake's eyes widen. "So you're telling me I didn't have to climb out the window?"

I shake my head. "I wish I could've seen it though."

Madeline busts out laughing. "You're an idiot, Jacob."

"Shut up, Madeline," Jake sighs, his face turning even more red.

"Aw, poor Jakey is embarrassed in front of Henley," Madeline teases.

I giggle, brushing off her remark. She always teases poor Jake for having a crush on me. I don't think he does, but she's hell bent on believing he does.

"Madeline, I will break all your records when we get home if you don't stop," Jake warns.

"Don't take it out on the music," I say, crossing my arms. "They're just beautiful masterpieces. Take your anger out on something else."

"Like what?"

"I dunno," I respond. "Anything but the music."

"You really love music, don't you?"

I nod. "It's just about the only thing that brings me peace since I left Los Angeles."

"I noticed you have a lot of Motley Crue albums," Eva says. "What's that all about."

I know that I can't tell them that I know Tommy personally. Either they won't believe me, or they'll bug me until I let them meet him and the band. I can't let that happen. I'm not going to let Tommy be bothered all the time all because I let it slip. They only just started touring with Ozzy Osbourne, but they've gained a shit ton of popularity in only the few weeks they've been on tour with him.

"They're just my favorite band. Always have been. I used to watch their shows at the Whiskey before they took off," I explain.

"They allowed you into the Whiskey?" Eva asks.

"I wouldn't say allowed. I'd sneak in through the back door. I was friends with the bar tender so she let me stay." I take a sip of my tea. "Besides, they didn't care as long as I didn't drink."

Eva opens her mouth to ask another question, but the bell rings. I silently thank whoever is above. I didn't feel like getting grilled with more questions.

Me sneaking into the Whiskey is true. But after a while, Tommy just started bringing me into their dressing room so that I wouldn't have to go through all that trouble. It was a lot of fun when I could convince Athena to come along. She tried to act like she wasn't having fun, but I knew better. I miss those days.

As I settle in my seat in the AP English classroom, I start to think about tonight. I just have the feeling it's going to be different than usual. That something is going to happen. Whether it's good or bad, I have no clue. Only time will tell.

TAGS:

All fics: @the--blackdahlia @sugar-content @sharon6713 @siliwanoel @charlyallise @lo-bells @lauravic @livingdeadharley @kawennote09 @ozzypawsbone-princeofbarkness @hllywdwhre @abbysdogcollar @nikkisixxwiththebass @waywardprincess666 @tommyleeownsme

@rock-n-roll-soul-frankie @unholy-brat @eak1996 @madsthegroupie @sinningsixx

Duff: @daisystuffsstuff

#duff mckagan #bby #fanfic #duff gnr #steven #steven adler #steven gnr #80s bands #80srock #80s rock #80s music #80s

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staytiny-angel · 6 years

Text

Inside/Out -Two

Inside/Out - Two

Rating: E

Main Pairing: Dean Ambrose/Cassandra Lincoln (OC)

Side Pairing: Seth Rollins/Finn Balor

Warnings: (for entire story) Language, Homophobic slurs, Smut, Violence, nongraphic mentions of Stalking, Attempted Kidnapping and Domestic Abuse.

Summary: Mechanic Dean Ambrose is about to be released from prison after serving three years for manslaughter after nearly beating Randy Orton, the Mayor’s son to death after Orton attacked his ex-girlfriend, the daughter of the town’s pastor Cassandra Lincoln. Having fallen in love with Cassandra himself over the last three years, Dean will stop at nothing to protect her from the still lingering threat of Randy Orton and the judgemental views of their small town.

Authors Note: This chapter is dedicated to the thirsty girl crew in the group chat. They are without a doubt the best cheerleaders a bitch could have.

2 years, 330 days ago

Hey Cassie-girl,

Books are always appreciated, Doll. I've never read the Harry Potter series before even though Seth has been on me to read them since we were kids. They're his favorite. Speaking of my brothers I hope I'm not overstepping but since Seth, his husband and Roman decided to move to Haven for the duration of my sentence, I asked them if they'd look out for you. I'm so sorry doll but even though I'm in here I heard that Orton is getting out of the hospital finally and I don't trust him. You know what Seth and Finn look like from my trial but Ro was still serving overseas so I'm enclosing a picture of him that they let me print out in the library.

Stay Safe Doll,

Dean.

2 years, 326 days ago

Hi Dean!

Those two new guys sound REALLY annoying and they actually call themselves the B - Team? How....strange. The Pastor is being weird and controlling again. I caught him trying to steal one of your letters out of the mailbox before I could get to it, So I bought a post office box. I don't trust him not to try again. I hope this letter finds you as well as you can be under the circumstances and that you enjoyed the newest care package I've included with this letter. It took quite a bit of research to find things that fit the state's requirements.

Talk to you next week

Cassie

Present Day

"AMBROSE!" a guard yelled, "Let's go!"

Dean carefully folded up the worn letter and placed it in the box with the rest of his Doll's letters. 3 years in Statie had gone by quicker then he could have imagined thanks to his beautiful Cassie.

The last thing he could have imagined happening when he'd shown up to a routine roadside assistance call was to come upon an attempted kidnapping but that's exactly what had happened.

*"Randy let go of me!" Dean had jumped out of his truck when he'd realized that the pretty African-American girl was being forced into the fancy sedan parked next to the convertible he'd been sent to retrieve. Looking closer he recognized both Cassandra, the Pastor's daughter, and Randy Orton, the son of Haven's mayor. *

"AMBROSE!" the guard yelled again "Wake up outta Lala Land inmate, don't you want to go home?"

"Course I want out Gallows. Gotta go marry my girl." Dean said with a grin. The prison Grapevine was far-reaching and though not all the guards were as fair or nice to him Gallows and his partner Anderson were old friends of his brother in law and knew the exact circumstances of his incarceration so the two had done their best to make his 'Vacation' at the state penitentiary as trouble free as possible.

"Well then get your shit and let's get you the fuck out of here."

Cassie fiddled with her hair and fidgeted as she waited, she had just gotten a text from Anderson saying that Dean would be out in a few minutes and it was taking everything she had to keep it together. She was startled out of her thoughts by the sound of the door built into the gate opening and the sight of a tall, built man with sandy brown buzzcut hair walking through carrying a box.

This was it, after three years of just letters, phone calls and supervised visits where they couldn't even hold hands, it was time for her and Dean's life together to truly begin.

Dean squinted as bright Florida sunshine blinded him momentarily. Blinking away the spots he looked across the parking lot and froze because sitting on the hood of her bright blue convertible waiting for him was Cassie.

Dean and Cassie stared at each other for an endless moment both unsure of what to do now. They had spent almost the last three years waiting for this moment.

Cassie moved first, hopping off her car and dashing across the parking lot. "DEAN!" She yelled happily.

Dean dropped the box just in time for his future wife to slam into him, wrapping his arms around her waist he picked her up and covered her mouth with his.

Cassie couldn't believe this was really happening, Dean was free, in her arms and currently kissing the absolute daylights out of her.

Finally parting, both panting from lack of air, bright blue eyes stared into chocolate brown for a moment before Dean spoke.

"I love you, Doll" he rasped " I didn't want the first time I said it to be while I was locked up, but goddamn do I fuckin' love you."

"I love you too, Dean." She whispered eyes filling with tears.

Dean nodded, his gaze filled with unspoken emotion and released her to pick up his box of belongings again. "Let's get the fuck outta here doll. I never wanna see this place again."

The two got in her car and started the long drive back to Haven. After a few minutes of silence, Cassie giggled. Dean looked at her quizzically "Cassie?"

"It's just that we've been talking as much as we could for almost three years. Now that we can say whatever we like....its like I don't have to. We know each other." Cassie said through her giggles.

"Your brothers are at the house. They were gonna surprise you but I know how you feel about surprises." She told him.

"They never learn. I just wanted one day just us before the hoard decends. They knew that. That's why they tried to surprise me." Dean grumbled.

Dean looked like he was deep in thought for a moment as they passed an industrial park that had been abandoned years ago and looked like it was still abandoned to this day.

"Pull in here Cassie-girl" Dean stated.

Cassie looked at him questioningly but obeyed and pulled into the park and behind one of the abandoned warehouses. "What are we doing?" She asked as she shut off the car and turned to face him.

"If I have to deal with my brothers for the rest of the day and night...I want some real kisses from my girl first." He said looking at her, the passionate look in Dean's eyes sending a bolt of heat straight to her center.

"Come here babydoll, Daddy has waited long enough."

Cassie debated with herself for about half a second before climbing over the gearshift and into Dean's lap.

"Christ, fuckin' finally." He gasped as her weight settled on his lap and against his already hard cock. "Gimmie that mouth again doll."

Without any more hesitation, the two began kissing passionately, their tongues tangling, Dean's hands pulling at the back of her shirt so he could get to her skin.

Cassie broke the kiss, gasping for air "Daddy, wait for a second." She grabbed the hem of her purple T-shirt and pulled it over her head revealing breasts covered in a lacy low cut purple and black bra.

Dean groaned "Are you trying to get fucked on the hood of this car right now? Cause if you tease Daddy, Babydoll that's exactly what's gonna fuckin' happen."

"But what if that's what I want Daddy? What then?" She said giving him a pseudo-innocent look.

"Open the door and get off me babydoll, You want Daddy's cock? You got it." Dean growled.

Cassie opened the car door and scrambled off him, already heading to the hood of her car. If she was honest with herself she'd been fantasizing about Dean fucking her on the hood of her convertible since the first time she'd set eyes on him, months before that fateful night when he'd saved her from whatever Randy had planned to do.

Dean came up behind her and spanked her ass fast and hard. "2 years, 2 years of Anderson and Gallows sneaking our real letters back and forth so those fuckheads checking letters at the prison couldn't get off on all the dirty, nasty things I wanted to do to my doll."

He reached under the short black skirt she was wearing "No panties? Really, doll?"

"I took them off when I realized we wouldn't get to be alone at the house right away. You told me to pull over before I could show you so we could stop." She gasped as he started to stroke her already soaking pussy.

"Lean forward, hands on the hood babydoll." He commanded, smirking when she obeyed. "That's Daddy's good little girl."

Cassie heard the jingle of Dean's belt buckle and prepared herself to get fucked hard and fast, only to be shocked when she felt her Daddy's mouth on her pussy instead. Dean had dropped to his knees on the pavement behind her.

"Gotta get a taste first, been waiting for so fucking long." He said swirling his tongue around her hard clit before taking it into his mouth and sucking messily.

"Oh fuck, Daddy please!" Dean grinned to himself, he'd made the not so innocent preacher's daughter forget herself enough to curse, something he knew was very, very rare.

"Do you want to come on Daddy's mouth or cock babydoll?" He asked standing as he replaced his mouth with two thick fingers, thrusting them inside and cooking them to hit her G-spot dead on pulling a short loud scream from his beautiful girl.

"Cock, Daddy. Need you inside of me please." She said on a wail as he hit that spot perfectly once more.

"Birth control?" He asked as he finished undoing his jeans and pulled his achingly hard cock out.

"All set Daddy, please, please fuck me." Cassie moaned nearly mindless with pleasure now.

Dean turned her head toward him, kissing her deeply before grabbing her hips and burying his cock inside her with one hard thrust.

Two loud moans, one deep and gravelly, the other high and almost musical filled the air.

"Oh God, finally. Finally fuckin mine in every single way." He growled setting a rapid pace as he reached around and pinched her clit. He knew damn well he wasn't going to last very long and he'd be damned if his girl didn't come on his cock like she wanted to.

Cassie was primed and ready feeling the pleasure coil almost immediately in her belly.

"That's it baby come for Daddy" Dean groaned feeling her pussy begin to spasm. "Shit, fuck!" He damn near screamed as he began to cum inside his girl just as she fell over the edge herself alternating between screaming his actual name and Daddy.

He laid across her back for a moment as they caught their breath before putting themselves back together and continuing the drive home to Haven.

#shai writes #dean ambrose smut.#dean ambrose imagine #dean ambrose fic #dean ambrose drabble #dean ambrose #dean ambrose/oc

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annaphoenix1994 · 3 years

Text

Colter - Old Friends (3)

Whole story masterlist here!

It was no surprise to Arthur that the knawing cold didn't seem to let up by morning. With a gruff sigh, he arose from his cot and fastened his gun belt around his waist, resisting the urge for a cigarette that he felt he desperately needed. He scratched his head before covering his unkempt hair with his weathered hat before opening a tin of biscuits and a can of peaches, quenching his hunger for at least a couple of hours.

He stretched before the old wooden floorboards creaked under his weight as he walked, seeing Dutch and Hosea gathered around the hearth as they discussed their plan.

"So what now, Dutch?" He heard Hosea question.

"We get strong. We get warm. And we wait. When the storm breaks, we need to move, but we're safe here." Dutch explained.

Arthur couldn't help but eavesdrop as he walked by on his way out of the cabin. He felt as if he needed the reassurance since he couldn't provide any type of explanation for himself. He shuttered his shoulders as he closed the cabin door behind him, welcoming himself to the morning wind as it felt to him as it was going to cut him in half.

"Javier," Arthur greeted as Javier was holding his post, a Carbine Repeater in hand.

"Arthur, how you doing?" Javier said through chattering teeth.

"Not freezing is good news," Arthur grunted as his palm rested on the doorknob. "What's he in there fussin' about?" He asked, referring to Micah.

Javier shrugged his shoulders, "Not sure, but he's probably upset because he has to share a room." He replied, sharing a chuckle with Arthur.

"Sure, the poor boy needs his privacy," Arthur snickered as he entered the cabin, greeted by the smell of bourbon and tobacco.

"-up with you boys, because I thought you liked action," Micah continued. "Couple of days on the lam and you lot have all turned yella!" He sneered as he handed the bottle of bourbon to Arthur as he found a seat for himself. "Apart from you, of course." He teased as he looked at his colored fellow gang member, Lenny Summers.

"Shut up, Micah!" Lenny hissed as he took a drag off of his well-needed cigarette. 'I didn't even smoke this much until I got stuck sharin' a cabin with this clown!' He thought.

"I ain't never seen so many long faces," Micah continued, not noticing Arthur glaring at him for his ignorance as he placed a log in the small hearth, presenting his gloved palms to the warmth, a slight jolt running through him as Javier slammed through the door, shaking the fresh snow from his coat.

"I guess... I guess folks miss them...that fell," Bill added, taking a needy drag from his cigarette.

"Well, when I fall, I don't want no fuss." Micah sneered.

Lenny snickered, "When you fall, there'll be a party!"

Bill laughed as Lenny playfully pat his shoulder as he looked over briefly at Arthur, who was bringing his freshly lit cigarette to his lips, letting the temptation take over as he couldn't go any longer without having one.

"A party...probably!" Bill repeated, snickering along with Lenny, not noting how Micah had stood to his feet to walk towards him.

"That funny, huh?" Micah said. "Sure," Bill replied before Micah delivered a blow to Bill's face before he could react, only to be stopped by Arthur and Lenny, who were both clenching their lips around their lit cigarettes as they forced Bill to sit back down.

"Maybe I don't feel like being laughed at by the likes of you two!" Micah sneered before shuttering as Dutch had now made his presence known.

"Stop it!" Dutch hissed. "Now! You fools punching each other when Colm O'Driscoll's need punching, hard. You wanna sit around waiting for him to come find us? All of you, we got work to do!" Dutch preached as Arthur made his way around him to go to his horse.

"Are you sure about this, Dutch?" Arthur asked as he rubbed his gloved hands together.

"Yes," Dutch replied sternly.

"Folks been through a lot recently...we hardly back on our feet yet," Arthur explained, exhaling a small cloud of smoke as he spoke.

"And the last thing we need is to be bushwacked by Colm O'Driscoll. Let's go." Dutch replied, guiding Arthur along with him to their horses.

"I know you hate him, Dutch,"

"He's here for us," He protested.

"I doubt that," Arthur shrugged.

"No, you're just doubting me,"

'Actin' just like a woman!' Arthur hissed to himself. "I would never doubt you, Dutch, you-you always said revenge is a luxury we can't afford."

"This is the right call, Arthur," Dutch insisted. "Take this," He demanded after he watched Arthur inspect the new repeater he had given him. "And this is about more than revenge for business long ago," He explained as he pulled a coil of rope from his horse before handing it to Arthur. "They were talkin' about trains and detonators. Colm always had good information."

"And you think now is the right time to hit a train?"

"Now you might fancy living on deer piss and rabbit shit...I'm getting too old for that life," Dutch teased as Arthur angrily flicked his cigarette into the snow. "Mr. Matthews, Mr. Smith, Mr. Pearson, would you please look after the place? There are O'Driscoll's about!" Dutch warned before leading his clan into the mountains.

───※ ·❆· ※───

"Alright, gentlemen, this is it!" Dutch said as he and the gang rode silently on the outskirts of their target's camp. "Are we goddamn ready?"

"Ready, Dutch!" Lenny, Bill, and Javier said almost in sync.

"Good. Now, Mister Morgan and I, we're going to head up here a little, see if we can't get a sense of the layout of the camp. Mister Williamson, Mister Bell, you two take up a hidden position just outside the camp. Mister Summers, Mister Escuella, you two hold position here. Let's go!" Dutch commanded before he and Arthur dismounted their horses and making their way up the hill to be perched on a ridge, getting a clear layout of Colm's camp.

"Perfect," Arthur mumbled as he pulled out his binoculars, scanning around the camp.

───※ ·❆· ※───

"Who's he talking to? He don't seem very happy." Dutch whispered as he and Arthur were analyzing the commotion below.

"No..." Arthur replied, keeping his binoculars set on Colm and the soul he had just slapped.

"Are they leaving?" Dutch asked as the unidentified man had climbed on his horse.

"Seem to be. Should we go get 'em?" Arthur asked.

"No. Colm can wait. Best to get some of them outta there," Dutch replied. "And much less fun to rob him and his score if he never finds out about it," Dutch and Arthur snickered. "Come on, let's get down there."

───※ ·❆· ※───

Kieran fumbled through his saddlebag on his horse, desperately trying to find the manuscript that was almost stolen from him by Minnie Barlow. Sweat beaded on his cold skin as he knew Colm was closeby, seeing that his solid black stallion was ground-tied a few yards away from him.

"Duffy!" Colm yelled. Kieran jolted as he immediately jogged to his leader.

"Why weren't you gonna tell me about runnin' into Miss Barlow?" Colm questioned with a sly grin on his lips.

"I-I was..." Kieran stuttered as he looked around. "I-I didn't let her get it, though. She almost shot me!" Kieran explained.

Colm chuckled, "You're damn lucky she didn't! And you'll be damn lucky if I don't shoot you right now for runnin' away when Dutch van der Linde is shootin' up my boys!" He hissed.

"I-I didn't run away!" Kieran protested.

"That's not what Phil's cousin said!" Colm argued as he slung his leg over his horse's back before lunging down and grabbing Kieran roughly by the collar, pulling him harshly into his horse's shoulder. "Said you were runnin' away. I'll tell you what: you get outta here and bring me Miss Barlow. I don't care how you do it, just do it," He hissed, his tobacco and whiskey tainted breath filling Kieran's nostrils.

"I'll die out there if I go now, please!" Kieran begged.

"I don't really care if you die or not, boy! Do it!" Colm demanded before slapping him and letting him go. "And don't you come back unless you got her!"

Kieran nodded as he ran to his horse, mounting quickly before digging his heels into the horse's sides, urging him to go as fast as he could. 'Just south-just find my way down south and I'll be fine!' Kieran assured himself as his adrenaline was causing his body to feel like it was taken over by static.

───※ ·❆· ※───

"Maybe I should take the lead on this one Dutch, they're gonna be gunnin' for ya once it starts," Arthur warned as he and Dutch trekked through the snow, clutching a weapon as they snuck through the outskirts of the camp.

"They haven't got me yet, but if you want, I'll wait on your call!" Dutch replied as they soon caught up to the others, who were behind one of the thin wooden walls that made up the perimeter of the camp.

"Hey! Anybody seen that new kid?" Arthur heard a fellow member ask from a nearby cabin.

"The one with the funny lookin' horse?" Another asked.

"Yeah!"

"Colm told him to bring back that Minnie Barlow if he wanted to come back!" A man answered.

"Minnie Barlow?" Dutch questioned as he looked back at Arthur. "She's around here?"

"I wouldn't think so..." Arthur replied, trying desperately to hide the sting of hurt that pinged through him. 'What the hell is wrong with me?' He scolded himself as he tried to subside the feeling, focusing on the task at hand.

"Ah, yeah, can't wait to see that pretty blonde fightin' 'round here!" He heard a man say.

He let himself snap.

He took his place in cover as he fired shots from his new repeater. Seven bullets at a time before it took two seconds to reload. The environment around him became slow and at his pace as he, Bill, Micah, Lenny, Javier, and Dutch shot down each O'Driscoll gang member one by one.

───※ ·❆· ※───

"Good work boys! Now, let's tear this place apart!" Dutch commanded as he mounted his horse. "Arthur, you take that building to the left!"

"Find those detonators, explosives, anything you can!"

Arthur nodded as he followed Dutch's directions, making his way to the desired building as told. He grinned as he approached the suspected explosives, recognizing the SAMSON BROS. SAINT DENIS DYNAMITE case, opening the weathered crate to see the prize possession.

"Here...this looks good...what do you think, Bill?" Arthur asked as he handed the former Army soldier the explosives.

"Looks fine...smells good." Bill snickered as he held the dynamite to his nose.

"Come on," Arthur said as Bill followed suit to join the rest on their horses.

"Did we get everything?" Dutch asked.

"Think so, Boss," Micah replied, handing him a manuscript. "Found this on one of them."

Dutch nodded as he opened the manuscript to see not only a map of a train's schedule but a small map of the whole region with small markers on certain areas such as the western region of the Grizzlies and an area close to Citadel Rock. Dutch furrowed his brows as he continued to study the map. "Did you find anything else?" He asked Micah.

"Found this," He replied, pulling out a small journal-like folder from his coat. Dutch retrieved it from him, seeing a 'wanted' poster enclosed. He chuckled as he knew he could poke fun at Arthur.

There she was.

Her 'wanted' poster opened to another gang leader.

"Looks like a train ain't the only thing they're after," Dutch said, getting the other member's attention.

"What is it, Boss?" Micah asked.

"They're after another outlaw aside from us," Dutch explained, holding the poster up for everyone else to see, noting Arthur's reaction once his eyes finally lay on the woman he had been so curious about. "Minnie Barlow. Sounds like she keeps herself busy by takin' robberies from Colm. Remind me to buy her a drink!" Dutch joked. He looked at Arthur, who didn't pay any attention to what was just said. His eyes were fixated on Minnie's picture: blonde hair, hazel eyes, and a slight scar on her cheekbone.

She was beautiful.

'She wouldn't have to hold a gun to me to steal my heart.' He sighed to himself, blinking his eyes quickly to rid the doubtful thought to keep the focus on what he was doing.

"Lemme see it!" Micah asked as he reached his hands up at Dutch to retrieve the poster. "I can see why Colm's after her. Fine lookin' woman!" Micah teased, hiding his past

Arthur shook his head, not wanting to hear anything else come from his mouth. "Give me that!" He hissed as he took the poster from Micah. "Remember the task at hand here, you fool!"

Micah put his hands in the air, "Oh, I'm sorry, you can have that so you can have somethin' to jack off to later!" He seethed.

"Enough!" Dutch intervened. "Arthur's right, we have far more things to worry about than drooling over a picture! I'm sure you boys can take out your frustrations when we get out of here and find a town, but for the time being, remember what we're doing!" Dutch preached. Micah and Bill groaned as they mounted their horses.

"Arthur, hold these for me," Dutch said as he handed him the manuscript and the 'wanted' poster. "Keep the poster. She has a high bounty on her head. Maybe we can rack in extra cash." He explained. Arthur looked at him almost appalled but soon realized that he only said it because he knew the other men were listening. Dutch knew Arthur too well to know that he was developing an early crush, which wasn't likely of him, but he didn't do a good job of hiding it. "This was something about the train they was gonna rob. A Mister Leviticus Cornwall," Dutch continued. "Mount back up. Let's keep moving!"

Arthur gripped the reins tightly as he was not mentally prepared to face the harsh winds of Mother Nature. Dutch's speech the entire ascent down the mountain went through one ear and out the other as if he had heard it before. As a matter of fact, he had heard it all before.

Multiple times.

"Hey, you see that feller? Wasn't he at the camp with Colm?" Dutch asked over the whistling wind, interrupting Arthur's thoughts.

"Leave him to me," Arthur grunted, nudging his horse into a canter before breaking to a trot to cross the river.

"Alright, we're heading back. Just bring him back alive. He could be useful!" Dutch said as he and the rest of the gang parted from Arthur.

"Okay, you got it!"

"You got the wrong feller!" He heard the young man yell from ahead.

"Not so fast there, partner!" Arthur mumbled as he dallied his rope around the saddle horn, pulling the young man from his horse and into the snow. "You're comin' with me!" He said as he effortlessly tossed the man to where he was laying on his torso.

"Please, please, you don't need to do this!" He begged.

"What's your name, boy?" Arthur interrogated as he tossed the man over his horse's hindquarters before tethering the man's horse to his own.

"I don't know!"

"You don't know your name?" Arthur questioned.

"It's Kieran! Kieran Duffy!"

"Well, I ain't gonna lie to you, this is a real bad day for you Kieran Duffy," Arthur chuckled.

"Where are you taking me?"

"Somewhere you ain't gonna like,"

"Why? What are you gonna do to me?"

"Something you ain't gonna like! So I'd advise you to save your breath for screaming," Arthur demanded.

"No, please!" Kieran begged. "A-Are you runnin' with Minnie Barlow? She threatened to shoot me a couple of days ago and-"

"She was a fool for not shootin' ya!" Arthur replied, not liking that the subject of Minnie Barlow had yet been brought up again to him.

"I-I'm no use to you!" Kieran pleaded.

"You better shut your mouth, you little shit, or I will shut it for you," Arthur threatened.

His horse whinnied at the other horses as they arrived back to camp, "Here we are, you sack of shit. Let's introduce you to the boys." Arthur chuckled as he slung Kieran over his shoulder.

"Don't hurt me, please!"

"Are you trying to test me, is that it? Because I will break every bone in your body!" Arthur threatened.

"N-no! I'm sorry!"

"That's two bones right there!"

📷

"You found the little shit, did you," Dutch chuckled as he stepped outside the cabin as Arthur slung Kieran into the snow.

"Yep...I got him,"

"Very good. Welcome to your new home. Hope you're real happy here!" Dutch explained in sarcasm.

"You want me to make him talk?" Arthur asked as he stood the man up after cutting his ankles free of rope, gripping his shoulders roughly.

"Oh no, now all we'll get is lies! Uncle. Mr. Williamson, tie this maggot up someplace safe. We get him hungry first. I got a saying, my friend: we shoot feller who need shooting, save fellers as need saving, and feed 'em as need feedin'. We're gonna find out what you need," Dutch explained, holding the manuscript briefly up to let Kieran see that it now was in his possession. "I can't believe it! An O'Driscoll in my camp!"

"No, I ain't an O'Driscoll, Mister!" Kieran begged. "I hate that feller!"

"Oh, whatever you say, son! Well done, Arthur!"

"I'm just sorry we missed out on Colm,"

"Oh, there's time enough for that. Now, I gotta figure out if we can hit that train," Dutch replied before dismissing himself into the cabin to talk about matters with Hosea.

"Okay," Arthur replied, looking around before pulling out the 'wanted' poster of Minnie that he was given by Dutch back at Colm's camp. He only had a brief look at her then, but now that everything around him had slowed down, he could really take her in.

"WANTED"

DEAD OR ALIVE

$8,000.00

MINNIE "BANDIT" BARLOW

THEFT, ROBBERY, and ARSON

ARMED AND DANGEROUS

APPROACH WITH CAUTION

LAST SEEN OUTSIDE CITADEL ROCK, NEW HANOVER

#minniebarlow #arthurmorgan #reddeadredemption2 #fanfiction #arthur morgan

1 note · View note

unqueenlybiscuits · 7 years

Note

K-pop hates your nasally tone.

fuck you and your cow

You Don't Mess With The Zohan Script

You don't mess with the Zohan! Come disco. No, no, no.I no disco, I make the fish. Danny, come on, go disco. Oh, okay. Disco! Danny, that looks good. You're gonnabe a hit at your bar mitzvah. So okay, Mr. Big Penachim,I no see you disco. No, no, no. I making dagim.I no disco. A real man, he can discoand cooking dagim. So let's go. Go, go. I get the hummus for you. And for you. Little for me, eh! No. No. Kapara, what is going on! Just some bullshit-uchen. Let's go! Hey, I'm on vacation here.Can't you see this! You promised me time off.Get someone else to do it. Are they gonna hurt him! No one can hurt the Zohan. - Bye, Zohan.- Take care, man. The terrorist known as Phantom... ...was spotted yesterday at aHacky Sack tournament in Beirut. He may be have been trying tobait us by surfacing briefly. We believe he's being kept in a safehouse on the Lebanon border. How is we lose Phantom! Didn't I capture Phantomthree months ago! What, you didn't hearabout the trade! What trade! Zohan, we gave back the Phantom. No! What do you mean,we give back the Phantom! Zohan, relax. It was a good trade.We got back Etan and David. That's all we gotfor a veteran terrorist! Come on, we got hosed here. They threw in a spyto be named later. Come on, Zohan,you have to like that deal. Maybe they're talking about Ze'ev. Ze'ev.Come on, he's not even a good spy. He got caught, for God's sake.He's a stupid. Our plan is to enter the building fromthe front with a team of eight men... ...with an additional 12 menat perimeter positions. Unfortunately, there is a highprobability of collateral damage... ...including property and loss of life,on both sides. Okay, here we go. Excuse me! Come on, is it not saferto send one man into building... ...with minimal coverageto take out the target... ...instead of blowing uphalf the neighborhood! Well, who would do that! Oh, "who would do that!" You know you weregoing to ask the Zohan. Zohan, why you say this! I just laid out an entire planwhich didn't rely on you. Come on, Yaron,you're setting me up. All this talk of civilian casualties,then of course I end up doing it. - But I'm not even asking you to do it.- All right, I'll do it. Give me Avi and Koby as watch,I'll get it done without the mess. Well, thank you. You didn't have to. Oh, I didn't have to, bullschlassah. Have some Fizzy Bubblech. "Kiwi watermelon"! Yeah, is good. "Avalon." Chunky cuts. Zohan, what are you doing!The girls are here. I know, I was watching television. Well, if you want to have fun with us,we're right next door. - Good with the sticky, you should do it.- No, no, no. I am going to dinner with my parents.Just leave me alone. - All right, all right.- It is all right! You don't giggle at the Zohan. You hear me!No giggling at the Zohan. You never giggle at the Zohan. What's the matter, tatele? You haven't touchedyour baba ganoush. What would you think if I tell you... ...I want to leaving the army,start a new life! Why would you do that!You are good at it. It's steady pay. You can't leave,you're one of their best. Besides, you are too oldto take a risk. Stay in the army, play it safe. There's other things I can dobesides war. You don't war. - I was in the real war.- I know, I know the story. 1967. We were surrounded on all sides,outnumbered. - And in six days, we...- And in six days, we won. You won. I'm sorry,I don't have a big, fancy war... ...that lasted all of six days... Six days and five hours.Your generation likes to forget that. Dad, I've done so muchfor the country. When does it end! They've been fighting for 2000 years.It can't be much longer. All of my friends servedthe minimum three years. Why can't I move on!Do something else. Something more creative. Creative, what! You've caught so many terrorists,it's an art. You're like Rembrandtwith a grenade. What will you do! Maybe go to America. What, and haggle overstereo equipment! Wait a minute, Ya'acov. Uncle Levi will set you upat electronic store. You make money, sow yourcreative oats, you come back. No, I don't want to doelectronics store. Then how will you make money! I don't want to say. Zohan, if you can't tell your parents,who can you tell! Come, Zohanele. I want to cut... ...and style hair. You... You fagala? He's fag... Faga... I like hair. It's pleasant,it's peaceful, no one gets hurt. Well, you're only diggingthat fagala hole deeper and deeper. Hello, down there!Hello, in the fagala hole. Maybe he wants Vaseline. Yes, it's so funny. I just want to make peoplesilky smooth. You know the Phantom will try to run,so be ready for this. - Zohan, now!- So let's go. The Zohan. Freeze! I get it, I get it,you guys don't like our country. So we are the bad ones. I'd love to sit and discuss thiswith you, but I'm short on time. I'm just saying.It's not so cut-and-dry. We settled herefor hundreds of years! Good point. None of my ancestors ever steppedfoot in this land. No, you're right. Hey, don't walk away! Come out, come out,wherever you are. Hello, jackass. You think you can oppress my people,landgrabber! But I will never disappear. No one can catch Phantom! So let's go. Very good. Sorry. It's for the cause. Zohan. Zohan, bring it. Why you do this! I feel no pain. No, no, no. I feel no pain. - I feel no pain. This is too much...- No, no, no. I feel no pain. I have told you in other fights. No, no, no. I kill you right now. Look, look, look. The piranha,it looks very painful for you. Is good, is good. Is very nice. Yes, yes. Fizzy Bubblech for me. You like what you see! Time to die. So let's go. Okay, game over. Yeah! I kill! I kill the Zohan! Zohan is dead. The Phantom! Cutting the hair,this makes something beautiful. Instead of shooting it. That's why I had to fake to die. I could have captured Phantom again,but for what! They trade him. I love my country,but the fighting, it never ends. It's like Mr. Scrappy, you bite Coco. Coco, you bite him back. Soon you are both having worms,eating your own poopech... I understand. The pills. Your parents thinkthey know what's best for you. Sleep. It's all about not getting recognized. I know how great I lookedin the beard... but I'll make this work for me,you'll see. Rise and shine, guys.Good morning. Is nice, huh! It's the Avalon. It says I care about the way I look,but I'm still approachable. Oh, you like this! Who wants to go next, guys!Who wants to look silky smooth! Yes. Yes. Oh, where are my two little babies!Oh, come on. Come on out, Scrappy, come on out.Come to Mama, Mr. Coco. Mr. Scrappy. Coco.What happened! Who gave you permissionto do this, huh! Who did! Answer me. Scrappy, was it you!It was you, wasn't it! You're always the instigator. Bad dog. You are a very bad dog.Never again are you gonna travel. Take me to the Paul Mitchellhair salon. - First time in New York!- Yes, my friend. So, what brings you here! I have a dream. I had a dream too. What dream you have! My dream was to come to America... ...and make enough moneyto send for me brothers and sisters... ...so that we all could enjoyfreedom together. - This is good dream.- Oh, yes, it is. - Is dream come true!- No, man. Me brothers and sisterswere hacked to death. But I love the Chinese food here.It's incredible. - Hey, you forgot these.- Those are for you, my friend. Good morning for you.I am here to meet Mr. Paul Mitchell. And who are you! Scrappy Coco.I am here to take a job from him. He isn't in right now. That's good. So I will wait, then. You know what! I'll takeone Fizzy Bubblech, a raspberry. You know,he actually doesn't come in too often. Yes, just tell him I am perfect for this,so let's go. - I am the best.- The best at what! All of this. The cutting, the styling,the making it silky smooth. I wanna know who cuts your hair. Oh, you like this, eh! This is the Avalon,straight from the Paul Mitchell book. I haven't seen that stylesince Luke married Laura. Sister, are you this Laura! You tell Paul Mitchell,Scrappy Coco was here to see him. If I find out he was here... ...or you are keeping himhidden from me... ...I will destroy you. Believe me this. What the hell was this, champ!I'm not paying for that! This asshole cut me off,made me swerve into you! With all due respect,I was in the bicycle lane. You came like a madman.Be glad nobody was hurt. I mean, somebody could've died.I mean, you came... Okay, real mature, sir. Real mature. You do not want to bethrowing bicycles. Look, stay out of my business,Mustafa. "Mustafa"! This is not my name.Who tells you this is my name! Whatever.Salami, bologna, apple sauce. Apple who! My friend, if I were you,I would change the tone. Avoid the pain. Listen, go back to your goddamnedpretzel stand. We got it... - Look what I've got. It's right here.- Please! - I've got it.- Please, let me go. I never work at pretzel stand.You like to insult people! Was that your feet! Yes, it's the feet. The feet uppercut. Here comes the double foot. This is good. Smell it, smell it, smell it.Now take it. - That's for you.- All right, let me go! You said you wanted pretzel! Okay, I'm good. Beautiful. You want some chickens! No, no, no. I fix for you. It's all b'seder. What are you, bionic! No, no, no. I only like the girls. Thanks, anyways. This is ridiculous traffic. Anyway, George insistedwe have the party. - I always get midnight shift.- Could you keep it down, please! I no sleep,I no see World Series Poker. Are you even watching the road! Be nice. He could be a terrorist. - Why Hamdi no get no midnight!- Could you at least change the station! - Hey, that was amazing.- Oh, yes. Where are you from, anyway! Where am I from! Australia. Really!Because you sound Middle Eastern. No, no, no. Similar accents. - Kangaroo. You see!- Sure. This is ridiculous. We're getting out. - Come on, dear.- I've been working longer than Hamdi. - You want me to get you home!- No, I'll grab a cab. You've done enough.That was crazy. Whose lockzie do I have to schluck? Oh, you know you're boning me.I don't know that. It's you. - What is happening!- What's happening! It's bullshaklaga. - We have to go.- Go where! - I'll run you.- What are you doing! This is legal! Scrappy, have another kneidlach.Come on. You're very nice, Mrs. Klayman. It reminds me of my mother's cookingin Australia. Really!It's funny, you don't sound Australian. Yes, no, no, no.This is because I am half Australian... ...half Mount Everest. So this is what you're hearing. Well, Australia,it must be really nice there... ...since they got rid of the apartheid. Oh, yes, the weather is much cooler. So, Scrappy,I understand you cut hair. I will be workingwith Mr. Paul Mitchell... ...as soon as I find outwhere they are hiding him. Oh, Mom, Scrappydoesn't have a place to stay yet. - Really!- Not yet. Well, actually,there's a nice one-bedroom... ...that just opened up upstairs. Nice light, not huge. And they redid the kitchen very well. - This could be good.- Could be good. Could be good. Hey, Mom,do you know where the detergent is! - That's very good.- Oh, my God! What! What's the matter! What's the matter! That's my mom. - It's okay, Michael.- I know it's your mother. She's very beautiful. Michael, I haven't made stickyin two days. - What do you want from me!- Couldn't you wait till I was asleep! - Or dead!- No, Michael. You do... What's he doing now! Why'd that happen!Why'd that happen! It's okay. Let me talk to him. Oh, I can't get up. No, no. You'll feel your legs againin two hours. Michael. Come on, this is nothingto feel bad about. Me sexing your mother. It's beautiful. It's natural. No, I didn't bring you hometo do it with my mother. Why not, huh!You don't want her to be happy! Did you see her! Did you look at her! I don't thinkI can ever look at her again. Michael, her faceduring the big bang-boom! You did not see! She was glowing. Patches. What are you...! Michael, come on. They'll be plenty of timefor you and me. Tonight, I take you to disco, huh!How's this! No, why would I wanna goto a disco tonight! Michael, you should go. It'd be fun! You could use a little stank. Yes, you need your penachimto take a swim. Yeah, a little chicken of the sea.It wouldn't hurt. Disco, disco.Let's do this, Michael. Yes or no! Come on, you get to disco. - All right, fine, I'll go to the disco.- Okay. I do your mother one more time,and then we go. - Wha...!- Seconds already! Oh, yes. Hey. Look at this. This is what you need, man,to let off a little steam, huh! How many times a day do youmake sticky! Two! Five! Twelve! How many times a day!I've had sex once in my life. It was at tennis camp.It was awful. You're too picky, Michael.Maybe that's the problem. Every weed in the desertis still a flower. Look at this. This a big one, eh! But look at the tits.These will bounce nice for you. Your mother, she has huge poopeh. I mean, very wide. But what I see are two big, strong legswrapped around my head, squeezing. So who wants to get somepoontachen? - I wanna get some poontachen?- Well, let's get some. Yes. It's good for you. Nice spinning. This is what I'm talking about.You play this. - I ain't playing this corny shit.- No, no. I need to set themood for my friend. Get out,you Daisy Duke-wearing motherf... - Disco, disco.- Good, good! - Disco, disco.- Good, good! Yes, hello. Hello. Hey, Zohan. Who you looking for! It's okay, no one can hear mein disco, Zohan. Can you believe the poontachatin this place! I'm not Zohan.My name is Scrappy Coco, my friend. What!Of course you are Zohan Dvir. They all think you dead in Israel.I'm not going to tell. Tell what!I don't know what you're talking about. Zohan, it's okay.Don't worry, I'm a huge fan. The way you took outAbdullah Meda in '94. And when you made Melami Benazireat his own shit in '97. I can't believe I'm meeting you, man. So, what the fachmaare you doing here! Come with me. Look, I couldn't takeall the fighting anymore. - What's it all for!- Are you crazy! If I could blow a terroristinside out like you... ...this is all I would do.I'd never sleep. - This is exaggeration.- No, it's not. You made Palami Habdallah's poodlesit on a live grenade. - You gotta show me how you did that.- I don't remember. I was young. So tell me the truth.Why are you in America! I no want to tell you. What! What! Come on. You are the best, Zohan.Whatever you say is good. I want to be hairdresser. You a fagala? I can't believe it. A great warrior, but also a fagalawith the penachim. No, no, no. I like hair. Come on, man, I get you real job. You come by my shop tomorrow. Israeli electronics. Are you crazy! - Everyone will recognize me.- No, you don't look like same Zohan. You have silly haircut now. - I have what haircut!- What! - You say I look silly!- No, no. Who said this! - You said this.- No, no. Nobody say nothing. I don't need your job. I get my own job on my ownat a big salon. You will see. You ever cut a sister's hair before! Yes. Sister, brother, grandma,grandpa, the whole family. I'm good at this. Have you ever workedwith dreads before! This is what you do. No more. This creature slayed. It's not a problem. Okay, he's got me.He's got me. He's got me. Okay. Okay. So we blind him in the eyes.We got you. And we finish him. You back away, I take hold of him.Go! Go! Go out! Go now! Go! This is hair. This is hair. Oh, okay. The joke's on me, eh! A big part of our job hereis making this a fun experience. Of course, of course. For a lot of kids, this is their first cut,and it can be very frightening. - I can imagine.- I don't want a haircut. Get away from me. Let me go. Young man, look what I found here. A nice balloon. Do you want it! It's right here. You shouldn't jump around... ...when this nice woman'sholding a sharp pair of scissors. If you move, she could slip andslice your jugular vein on accident. There's no way to stitch the jugular. All of your blood will be on the floorin four minutes. I've seen this. I've done this.You don't want this. Well, then, at least it's a good time toshave his neck. I would get him quick. When I was your ageI already killed seven men. Maybe you should grow up. I promise you you won't regret. And come back. "Fujigawa"! I don't know that brand.It really isn't... It's not really Fujigawa.It's Sony guts. - Wouldn't it be better with the Sony...- Oh, no, no, no. This is what you want. - Four-hundred fifty.- But the ad says "Sony," and "300." No, no, no. What you going to believe,me or the ad! Four-fifty. Hello, Going Out of Business.Can I help you! Sony, yes. Three hundred. Come in, yes. Very good, very good. Hi. I represent the new ownerof this building. Good for you. Want a birthday cake!What do you want! Yamaha is very good. Did you receive our letterregarding your rent! - This I don't know.- It's being raised to 20,000 a month. No, no, no. This is too much. Eighty-five hundredis all we'll give you. - This isn't negotiable. We can get...- Ten thousand, that's all. We both go home happy. - I'm sorry. We can't settle for less.- Okay, no deal. You come back when youwant to deal. - Sir, you don't understand.- Go. What you still here for! You like me!I have girlfriend. Go. Thank you very much. Hey, look who's here. Come on, not so loud. Don't worry, Zohan.I tell you, they don't recognize you. Yosi. This is good man.This ChocolatÃ© Coco. - Scrappy Coco.- Scrappy Coco. Cooking Who-co! Yes, yes. So you're going out of business! No, no, no, no. Is just a sign.Is good for business. Yeah, so you look me up, man.That's cool. I come for job. Job. So you not big hairstyle! It's not really happening for meso far. So I am here. So let's go. No. No job. What do you mean!You tell me to come here. I can no let you do this.You want to be hair homo. No, so I do this for now.It's all yofi tofi. Is no now. Once you start in electronics store,you never get out. Look at Ephraim. You see! I don't see nothing wrong with that.It's perfect. Ephraim came to America... ...to be racing car driver. But he let slip away. I can hear it. Look. Check your ear. Pinchas wanted to bethe next Bill Cosby. No. Is resistant, no proof.You don't understand! But the store kept pulling him back. Maybe you swimming with the watch. - I'm not swimming...- Is resistant. Yosi wanted to be a hand model. What, you don't like this! Look at this.This is most beautiful. But he got too comfortable here. Press this button, it's free HBO. The electronics storeis a dream killer. And I won't let the Zohankill his dream. You are a real mensch, Oori. You the mensch. Come. What! What's this! You may not go for this,but this place cross the street... - Yes!- They maybe take you. - Is good place!- No, is dump, but they take you. Is on Palestinian side of street. Palestinian! No, no, no.Look, nobody kill you there. Here nobody care. First off, no one kill me anywhere. But Palestinian, no. I've done enoughto my parents already. I just want job for the Zohan. And it kills methe way Phantom bastard... ...getting his buttochim kissedin Palestine now. Buttochim kissed! What's this! He have business. He buy wives. Him! They say his ugly face everywhere. Everyone is runningTo Phantom's Chewy Muchentuchen For the food the heroes eat Kubeh, sambouesk,Delicious muchentuchen You never know who you'll meet You are going to get spoiled. Phantom Muchentuchen! Oh, yeah! This month,order Muchentuchen Happy Lunch... ... and get action figures fromPhantom Presents: Death to Zohan. Unbelievable. This animal gets to live his dream.But, me, l... I can no work Palestinian, no.It's like... I can't do this. Yes, you can. Is your dream to cut hair.You want fight, or you want hair! I want hair. But I'm scared. Is America.You can do anything here. You never done somethingpeople thought was impossible! So you don't want to talk, huh!I'll make you talk. I can do this. Disco, disco, good, good. Disco, disco, good, good. Disco, disco, good, good. Disco, disco, good, good. Disco, disco, good, good. So you have never cut hair before. I have cut my own hairand several dogs. I have the Paul Mitchell book,I have the stamina, the desire... But you have no trainingor experience. Would you hire someonewith experience in something else! In what! Can anyone here do this! Okay. I have never seen that. That is very nice,but that is not going to help me. No hands. Besides, I have no openings. If anything, I need to scale back... ...since they just raised my rentthrough the roof. Out of nowhere, some guy with a tiecomes in and tells me I need to pay. Stop it! I only wish to learn. I will do whatever it takes. Fine. You can sweep up haira few shifts a week. - You won't be...- No pay. No, no, no.But then, I will become stylist, yes! That could be a while. I will wait turn. You will see. I will get nighttime job for money. Soon the whole worldwill be silky smooth. Zohan. - Carmen Electra has the best tits now.- Oh, please. Oh, my God.I wonder how much she paid for them. They're so perky. You know, leave it to herto buy the best tits. It's always first class with that one. You know you don't have to catchevery piece of hair as it falls. Yes, I do. You deserve a perfect floor.One single hair is unacceptable. As you were. Yes. I got this. "Did you seethe new Kate Hudson movie! I think she is even more vivaciousthan her mother." Scrappeleh, that's wonderful.Now, let's practice on Michael. Michael!Could you come in here, please! What! What is...! Oh, Scrappy needs to practicesmall-talking. Can we do this another time! I havea shot at keeping my food down. Michael, I want to practice now. I'm afraid I'm terrible at this.Why won't you help me! Oh, honey.You are good at everything you do. - Got it.- Thanks. So you're making her silky smooth,huh, Claude! - Framing her face!- Yeah, Scrappy. I'm framing her face. This is smart. A nice layered stylewith the soft bangs... ...is good for a bigger womanlike this. - Coco.- Takes the eyes off the moon face... ...and brings it toward the titzim. Coco. I need to speak to you. In private. Private. A secret! They will never get it out of me,I promise you. Coco, Claude is trying to work. Yes. He's very good. So I am ready to cut hair today.So let's go, let's get it on. No. Let's not go. But I am the best. Don't tell me you're the best. - I have the desire, the stamina.- You've been here two days. I run this place for five years. I think I know when you are readyto cut hair. Okay, Jeez! Get a room, you two. No, no, no. I do not touch thiswith your penachim. Out of respect for the working. No, you don't eat where you shit. Or shit where you eat.Whatever the... The smell is bad. This is called a comb. - With the fingers!- Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, no, no. - Scrappy.- I'm sorry. Here, I take your leg up. I'm sorry about this. I'm sorry. - Okay. All right.- I apologize. - Take him where he wants to go.- Thank you. Okay. - Good luck.- It will be fine. - Your limousine has arrived, sir.- You're observant, Tyler. Thank you, Big Mac. I am really late for a hotel openingdowntown. The Walbridge Hotel. I understand, sir. I know theneighborhoods inside and backwards. - We will not let them stop us.- What! I'm not in much of a hurry. Oh, no. You want some coffee back there! No! I will lose them. Nobody is following us. Oh, shit! Have a good time, sir. Debbie, you did a good job. You look very bangable,Mrs. Rosen. Mrs. Paulson, I must tell you... ...when you first came in,you looked hideous. There was nothing attractive. But now, I must say,my schtitzel, it's about to burst. - It could break these any...- What are you doing! We are talking shop. No. No. - Look, Coco...- What! You need to calm down now, okay! I don't think these customerslike the way you talk shop. Nobody say this. Coco, remember,respect for the workplace. I have betrayed my salon. He's trying to kill himself. - Scrappy.- I deserve this. No, no. Just... Just... Easy on the ladies. I didn't mind. Take care, Mrs. Paulson. She did not mind. Let me disinfect the scissors... ...so someone elsecan make someone else silky smooth. I'll just clean up. Rafaela's Salon. What! No. Debbie, she quit. - What!- Sorry. Claude, did you know about this! I should have told you. She's been looking for a new jobsince those rent guys came around. Then why you no say nothing,little bitch! Don't worry,I'm not giving up on this place. You're a good guy, habibi.I just... I don't know what to do. So let's go. Scrappy, I have enough problemsright now. I not the problem. I the solution. I fix. But if you screw up... I can't afford a screwup right now. No, no, no. I no screw up.I am the best for the job. Yeah, but you push and push."When is my turn"! I have to care about salon. - No, no, no.- No, no, no. You care about you. And don't fightin front of the customer. Mrs. Skitzer,I am afraid our stylist is out today. Would you care to wait for Claude! Does he do hair! He's not a regular. Well, that's fine. She say...I mean, only if it's okay with Dalia. Okay. You will not regret this decision. Mrs. Skitzer, let's cut your hair. Just lay back, Mrs. Skitzer.I'll take care of everything. - Oh, thank you.- Thank you. Sexy woman like youdeserves to be pampered. Me, sexy! Sure. Don't be humble. You've got the ass and titsof a schoolgirl and you know it. And everyone else knows this too,believe me. Yes. Let me get your earring off. I love it. Of course you do.I make you silky smooth. I tell you this. All right, Scrappy.You can cut Debbie's clients today. If they want you. Thank you. I'll get to you all soon as I'mall the way done with Mrs. Skitzer. That all you got, Mrs. Skitzer! Come on, baby. Go, baby. Yes. Yes. So who's next! Come on, Scrappy! Thank you, dear. - It's a lot of speakers.- Yes. Yes. It's orgasmic. Oh, my God. Oh, yes! Grab it, Scrappy! For you. Yes. I give this to you. - No. I am sorry, Mr. Paul Mitchell.- Hear me out, Scrappy, please. I'll give you stock options.I'll name a shampoo after you. No, my loyalty is to here.I will destroy you. I heard about this placefrom Joanne. You have to ask for Scrappy. Yes, is the primarycardholder present! Excuse me! Hello, I am callingfrom Spiegel catalogue. Are you between the agesof 18 and 39! We're trying to talk here. Have you ordered from cataloguein past six months! Could you get off the phonewhile you drive! Hey, what's the matter!I trying to make a living, do my job. This is your job. This is job also. This is not Iraq. I am Palestine, I'm not Iraq. And you're not getting a tip. And you are a stupid cow. Jeez. - And we're done. Okay, you, skedaddle.- Thanks so much. - I'll see you later.- All right. I like this, the red hair. I bet she has a pumpkin patchdown below, yes! I don't know. - Did you tap her tuchus?- No. Why don't you go afterthe snatchacheem in this place! They all want you, believe me. Scrappy, I wouldn't be so sure. I'm telling you,you're not picking up the signs. Come with me.I'll show you a technique. It's beautiful. Hello, Mrs. Haynes. How are you!You want the cut and color today! Yes, please. Thanks. Watch. You see! She's going with it.It's good. Yep. - She has a free shoulder. Come join.- I'm good. Mrs. Haynes,you're getting cold here. Claude, come. Keep her warm. Go ahead. Yes. And gently move.Gently move the shoulder. All you want to do is let her knowyou're here for her. Now look awaylike you're not even doing it. We're not doing this. - Same rhythm.- Okay. Push. Push. Push. Oh, you're pushing harder.It's starting to feel good on my end. I am trying to make moneyto start my own business, huh. Would you say you read Spiegelonce a month, twice... Would you just get usto the hair salon! We're gonna miss our appointment. I curse you, and I curse your hair. What is big dealabout this hair place anyway! They get worse every year. Okay, we'll take them to the truck.We'll just talk to them. But we'll find a... Did you throw this shoe at me,my friend! No! Sure looks like it was you. Then who threw it! Okay. You're lucky I'm in good mood.I'll let you off the hook. Nobody spits on me. Thank you for the goat, my friend. Yes. Goat! Goat. Goat! Goat! Goat. I said, "Can we have the receipt!" Yes. Die in hell. Welcome. We'll color your hair Bling-BlingBlond. This is what you need. You know what else they go for! The... I don't know what you have,but mine is the biggest. This...It does not get bigger than this. It's enormous. Scary. I mean: What! I have the biggest. It's the biggest. Take a look at this. Look. - It's not that big.- It's not that...! No, no, no. The bush. The bush is the biggest. And the girls like thisbecause it's cushion. It is no bullshaklaga. He is the one.I never forget a face. So, what do you want I do! Wait. I conference you. Hello! Nasi, emergency meeting.You're on with Hamdi as well. - Hello, Nasi.- Hello, Hamdi. Can you believehow much they pay Delgado! Yes. Why Mets do this! This is serious. We meet! I explain why is emergency. This is not just manwho take my goat. - Zohan Dvir.- Yes. Everyone think Phantom kill him. Phantom not kill him. We will capture,then make trade with Israel. We will be heroes. But, Salim, we are not Jihadim. Wedon't know for sure that this is him. Let's call Hamas, Hezbollah.Let them handle this. - Leave it to the pros.- No. Hezbollah shmezbollah. Hezbollah will take all the credit.This is our shot. Why not let Phantom capture him! Screw Phantom. He hero already. Where's my chainof muchentuchen restaurants! Salim, don't make thisabout yourself. This is about me. And about him. And about my goat! Come on, let's go! This is nice,the walking inside the outside. The park, the people,the horses, the kid. Well, you're always downtown. You should seea little more of New York. Yes, yes, this is good. The talking is good... ...to get to know each otherbefore the bang-boom. I like. Oh, no, no, no.There will be no bang-booming. I just wanted to thank youfor saving my business. - This isn't a date.- No, no, no. I feel you have helped me so much... The right thing to dois to tap you so hard... ...my schtitzel will come outyour poopech. That's what I think. Look, why don't wejust enjoy the park! No, no, no. This is what we do. Hey, look, softball. - You like softball!- Of course, I love softball. What is softball! Teach me how to. I learned softballwhen I came to the States. When you're Arab, it helps to fit in. Yeah, how long you move here ago! Just a few years ago. I couldn't take it there anymore.All the hate, on both sides. Yes, especially yours. Why you say this! You don't know. No, no, I don't. I read this. The Australian-Tibet mediais very biased. Look, both sides crazy. My own family... My brother... ...if he knew I work cross streetfrom Israelis, he would lose it. - Really!- You have the hardcores on both sides. They just want to fight and fight. Nobody will win this way.It has to stop. When will it end, eh! Yes. Okay, so you must be thirsty, no! Here. Where you get this! This! From specialty shopon West Side. This Middle Eastern drink.You know this! Fizzy Bubblech! No, no, no. It looks pretty good. Oh, try, try. It's very good.Try, have a sip. It's not for me. No! Really! This is his shop. Here is photo for compare. For how long this take!I close the newsstand. Make sure you ask himif he ever hit by shoe. And about the prize goatthat can fetch a bowl of onion soup. Look in his eyes when youask him this, for they will be suffering. - You know, I just got haircut.- Go. Look at this. I feel like Hugh Hefnerwith all you little bunnies around here. Okay, okay,let's see who is going next. "Jorge Posada," where are you! That's me. Okay, good-looking guy,you take a seat there. You're next. You know, you look likeyou already just got haircut. No, no. So I guessing you're looking forsomething in the silky smooth area! - Well...- Because I see you have nice curls. You don't want tocut into those curls. We will talk about this over there. Okay, Scrappy, I wait. Is not like I have a shoe to throw. Sure. Yes. Beautiful. Whatever. I don't have time to go watcha goat fetch soap. - What!- What! I don't know. Listen, my friend... ...you want to talk, it's good,but you have to wait your turn. First I have to cut and bangMrs. Greenhouse. - That's right.- Okay. Well, I'm ready for it. Oh, dear. I am sorry, Mrs. Greenhouse.I am not man enough for you today. Oh, Scrappy, it's fine. I don't know what the problem is.I am going to lose business. Oh, no, dear. You're still adorable. The screwingwas really just a bonus. You are an angel, Mrs. Greenhouse. An angel with a magic throat. Oh, Scrappy! No, that could work.One more, please. Let's see what we got. And we're still nothing. Well! He was very cool. Idiot. What did he say! He think I have nice curlsthat go well with a full face. - But was it him!- Well, it looked like him. But hard to know. I tell you this: he didn't seem to carewhen I talk about goat fetching soap. Soup. The goat fetched soup.You ruin everything. Soup! This makes no sense. Screw you. It's him. I know it's him. The goat fetched soup!This is unbelievable. Go to hell. You said it was urgent! It's an emergency.Please, take a look. Yes, yes. Well, that's not a real problem.You can always shave it. No, not the bush. No, inside the bush.Look deeper. Him. - I see.- He lays in there all day long. Maybe it needs some more oxygen.It looks like it's being strangled. So the Palestinian says to the priest: "Okay, but let's skip the bath." Why, are they not clean! No, is good joke. Honey, are you all right!You've been in there for over an hour. What is this stuff! I mean, I took onesip and I repainted the whole toilet. Is Fizzy Bubblech.You'll get used to it, relax. I don't wanna get used to it.My car couldn't. - All right, that's it for me. I'm done.- What! What! Is everything all right! - Is it about the pee-pee!- Stop it. - The pee-pee!- He can't do with his peepeechosetz. Really!He's usually as hard as trigonometry. - Mom. What...!- When did this happen! The last few days. Of course. It's ever sinceyou went out with that Dalia. Your hog is telling you something.She must be the one. The one! Is this possible! Of course it's possible, man. All the beaverim in the worldand he falls for Palestinian muffich. Why should Scrappy careif she's Palestinian! He's from Australia and Tibet.He's not Israeli. - No, no, no.- Oh, no, no, no. Exactly. What was that, a motor boat! You know, Scrappy... ...a special woman is specialno matter where she's from. Listen to your hog. Someone special. Maybe is good. It's good! It's terrific! I mean, you know,you guys won't be together anymore... ...but Scrappy is in love.That's great, awesome. Thank you for your support. - Is a good boy.- Good boy. This is fun. Let's celebrate.Where's the cat! Let's cat-sack, huh! Throw it to me. - Got you.- Let's play, man. Take it, Michael. Look at you. I wanna try it. Is good. Welcome to Hezbollah phone line. For membership information,press one. For negotiation update, press two. For bonus mile information,press three. For terrorist supplies, press four. We have currently suspendedour terrorist supply service... ... as we are engagedin negotiations with Israel. We will resume service as soon asnegotiations break down. Thank you. Great. Come on. Just think of a bomb. They say you can make bomb fromeveryday's material. You combine. Yes, okay.But what we combination! Just think of chemicals. Chemicals, like in science class. Yes. Who remembers this stuff! Hello. Well, can I help you fellasfind anything! Yes, do you have... ..."liquid nitrogen." You need what! Liquid nitrogen. Yeah. Well, I supposewe have some of that. Now, just a moment. - This is it!- Yes, and that's the large container. This works! Oh, it works quite well. Yes. You use! From time to time. Sure. We'll take 12. Look, you can turn off the water... ...but we will find a wayto keep on going. Oh, you like when I spray you,Mrs. Skitzer! Where's the $ 14,000! I have your rent right here.There is no getting rid of me. We don't wanna get rid of you. Mr. Walbridge would actually like torelocate your salon in our new mall. You mean the one you want to destroythis community to build! It is not our intentto destroy this community. I'll take the community, Pancake. My name is Gray, and I'll be back. Nice to meet you, Pancake. Why Pancake! Just for fun. You were amazing right there. Oh, my God. What! I have one. What! I have zikpah. Look at it. It is you. Dalia, I don't know how to tell you this.I cannot make sticky with anyone else. You are the special one. I will only be stiff for you. Who is Steve! Stiff, with an F. - Stiff. Stiff.- Yes. Okay... ...I know you meant thatin a good way... The best of ways. - so thank you. Thank you. Is crazy. This has never happened. One woman... ...one zikpah... ...one life. You see his face!Scared Israeli son of bitch. Salim, this is not bomb. What you mean "not bomb"! It's grade A liquid nitrogen. Guys, I really need to go home. Inaz have a soccer matchin the morning. - I am hero.- Salim, this not bomb. It just go: Well, just go with it. I scraped some off the window. Maybe you know what is! It's Neosporin, it's nothing.I use it for cuts and genital sores. We're beginning to thinkmaybe someone out to get the Zo... The Scrappy. You mean like a competing salon!That's heavy. Don't be afraid, honey.Don't be afraid. Well, I... Yeah, lick this.No, she likes the tongue in the ear. Oh, I like that bet... Oh, I like that. Close with the brenski. Come on, get some salivaon those bad boys. - She likes it, huh!- Of course she likes it. Okay. I could look for clues. It's my shiftfor community night watch. The what!The communism tight crotch! Oh, it's the communitynight watch program. You know, people in the neighborhoodpatrolling it, keeping it safe. We kick some ass. Hey, why don't you let Scrappy Cocotake your shift tonight! - I bet he'd be good at this.- Oori. What! For clues. I know it sounds scary, Scrappy,but you are gonna be just fine. Maybe I can manage one night. Maybe you can pretzel some people. - Thank you for getting the hummus.- The hummus. Where's Patches! Patches. I'm terrified right now.I'm totally terrified. "Shitting my pants"doesn't come close. I wish I was shitting my pants. It's just a patrol. What if something goes down! I don't know if I'd have the courage. What if something goes downand someone got killed! I would have to live with that.I'd be happier shitting my pants. Much happier. - Let's go.- We're supposed to call the police. No. No time. No, no. No. It's good. Drop the paint. Get out of here, Ahab,or I'll cut your eyes out. - Maybe we should let him finish.- No, no, no. What you cut my eyes out with!The Neosporin! My blade, camel jockey. My friend, the beating I give youif you stop the spraying... ...is much less than the beatingI give you if you try to cut me. What are you laughing at! That was just with everyone. They had it coming to them, right! Yeah. Yeah, it seemed like it. Yeah. - Okay, you take it from here.- I got it. Everything's gonna be okay. What you gotta say about that, huh! You're telling meour guys can't handle... ...some neighborhoodnight-watching losers! We can't even put a scareinto these people! The main guy who got in the way... ...is the same one who's bringingold biddies into Rafaela Salon. My aunt goes there. She says besides the sex,the guy gives a pretty good haircut. Don't talk to me about that dump. I've got a huge,classy hotel standing there... ...and it's staringat that cheap garbage. I want it staring at the Supercuts. Now, has anyone made any headwaywith any of these foreign people! I spoke to the manager of GoingOut Of Business again yesterday. I stated our priceand the urgency of the matter... ...and he offered me two-thirds lessand a Toshiba DVD player. The people at Everything Must Gowere just as difficult. They offered me a Blu-ray discand a jar of hummus. What's hummus! It's a very tasty... ...diarrhea-like substance. Grant Walbridge has a vision. A vision for Lower Manhattanto have the first indoor mall... ...with its own 300-footroller coaster. You know, you're lucky I havea world-class superhot girlfriend... ...with a perfectly proportionedass-to-breast ratio... ...or I'd be furious. She is smoking, sir. I'd payto spend an hour with her, sir. Let me in on that. Well, thank you. But if you bitchescan't get those people out... ...I will find other peoplewho will get the job done. However, whenever. Walbridge! This is where I find them. But I don't know if it's same peoplewho try to Neosporin salon. But you caught them writing this crap,so, what do you do! - You don't mess with the Zohan.- Check it. - Disco.- Disco. - Good.- Good. Why did you do thisto Naseef's store, huh! Why you blame the Israelis! We come to work,go out of business. No, no, no.Is not Israeli who do this. I do community watch.Don't worry, it's all taken care of. Not Israeli! Who else would write"Arab go home"! Oh, I don't know,just maybe 99 percent of the world. - You see what he says!- That was joke. Come on, come on.You guys get along here, stop this. Yeah, here it's okay. It's just there,the war is never going to end. You know, we were so close to peacebefore the asshole shot Rabin. Bush, he see the big picture. Bush no want peace,he set it all back. What about Bush's wife!This is a wife I would get sticky with. I would do this. I would do this. - Yes, yes.- What about Clinton! I would do Hillary. The big legs. Yeah, she look strict,like she's going to teach me a lesson. - Yes, discipline.- You know what's funny! I like Chelsea. You're crazy. She has beautiful legs. If I want legs, I'll take Obama's wife.She has legs. This is what happenswhen they talk politics. No, no, no, wife of McCain! She has the ass,and you know she's not getting any.

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motleyfuckingcruee · 5 years

Text

Hold On (Dirt!Tommy Lee x Reader)

Requested:

@the--blackdahlia

Description:

I'm craving some Tommy goodness/angst

Warnings:

Accidental overdose, angst, fluff, GET THE TISSUES READY

THE SONG THIS IS LOOSELY BASED ON:

Hold On

REQUESTS ARE OPEN!!!!

COMMENT IF YOU WANT TO BE ON A TAGLIST! OR GO TO MY BIO TO ADD YOURSELF TO ONE!

(Your P.O.V)

"FUCK YOU!" You scream at Tommy. You storm into the bathroom, slamming the door behind you.

"YOU CAN'T JUST FUCKING STAY IN THERE, (Y/N)! QUIT ACTING LIKE SUCH A BITCH!" Tommy yells through the door.

Tears stream down your face. You knew it was a mistake to confront him about the rumors you'd heard. He got mad because you don't fully trust him. But how can you? He's a rockstar. Chicks want to fuck him left and right. And Tommy can't refuse any of them.

You sit on the floor with your back pressed against the door. You pull your knees up, resting your head on them.

You can't hear anything, so you're guessing Tommy fucked off. Half of you is happy. You're glad the cheating fuck left. The other half is hurt. You want him to fight for your relationship. You guess that's not going to happen.

After an hour or so passes, you finally stop crying. You feel tired and have a splitting headache. You need some aspirin.

You pull yourself up off of the dirty bathroom floor by grabbing onto the also dirty sink. God you need to clean this place up. You pull open the mirror which reveals a cabinet. Multiple pill bottles litter the cabinet. You have no idea what's in most of them. Tommy's the pill popper. Not you. You stick to weed and blow every once in a while.

You finally find the painkillers. You take out four, feeling the headache get worse. You pop them in your mouth and swallow them dry.

You feel your headache go away instantly.

Huh, that's different that normal. You think to yourself.

That's when you feel your body start to go rigid. You feel your heartbeat pick up and you're having trouble breathing. You finally lose your footing. You collapse to the ground, instantly losing consciousness.

------

(Tommy's P.O.V)

I pull another beer out of the fridge. I pop the top open, just wanting to calm down. I've only had two beers so far, and I have a pretty high tolerance. I really don't want to be drunk when I go talk to (Y/N) drunk. That will only make shit worse.

I knew I shouldn't have gave in to that one girl. Now (Y/N) is going to leave me. I love her so much. I fucked up big time, and I don't see a way out of it this time.

I hear a loud thump coming from upstairs. I run up the steps, feeling like something is wrong. Of course, I could just be on edge from the fight.

I pound on the bathroom door. "(Y/N)? You alright." No answer. I feel bile rise in my throat. Even if we're fighting, she'll let me know she's alright. "(Y/N) OPEN THIS GODDAMN DOOR! CAN YOU HEAR ME?"

Still no answer. My heart speeds up. What the hell is wrong? I do the only thing I can think of since the door is locked. I kick it as hard as I can. The door flies open, revealing an unconscious (Y/N).

"Oh my God!" I yell, not sure what to do.

Call 911 dumb ass, My thoughts say.

I run to the phone we have in our room. I quickly dial the three numbers.

"911, what's your emergency?" The operator says calmly.

"M-My girlfriend is unconscious on the bathroom floor. I-I don't know what happened," I try to explain. My eyes stay locked on my almost dead looking girlfriend.

"What's your address, sir?"

I quickly gave her the address. "AND HURRY THE FUCK UP!"

"Sir, please try keep calm," The woman says. "Can you see if she maybe took something that made her pass out?"

I look at the counter, instantly finding the ecstasy I put in the aspirin bottle opened.

She took my ecstasy. That took a few moments to register in my head. SHE FUCKING OVERDOSED ON ECSTASY!

"S-She overdosed," I stutter.

Just then there's a knock at the front door. I look out the window and see the flashing red and blue lights. I hang up the phone.

I run down the stairs, throwing open the door. I lead the paramedics up to the bathroom where (Y/N) still lies.

I'm scared to touch her. I caused this. If I hadn't have gotten mad. If I hadn't have started yelling at her, she wouldn't have needed to take aspirin. I know she was crying hard enough to give herself a headache.

The paramedics take her out to the ambulance. I follow them in my car.

I don't even register what's going on around me, or even what I'm doing. My mind is on (Y/N). How lifeless she looked. Her beautiful (H/C) hair was tangled. Her skin looked so pale. Paler than normal.

Hours pass as I sit in the hospital waiting room. I'm guessing sometime during these hours I called the boys. Or maybe (Y/N) still has Nikki down as her emergency contact. They were best friends before we got together. Nikki wasn't happy with me there for a while, but once he saw how happy she is-was with me, he calmed down.

Nikki rubs my back, but I barely feel it. I feel numb. The woman I love is dying right now because of my stupidity.

At that thought, the tears start to fall. I don't bother to hold them back. What's the point? My love isn't beside me. I don't need to act strong.

I need her.

I feel Nikki, Vince, and Mick all surround me. They try to comfort me the best they can, but I don't even hear what they're saying.

"Family of (Y/N) (Y/L/N)?" A man in a doctor's uniform says.

I stand up with the boys behind me. They consider themselves her family. In a way, we're a weird little family. We've been through hell and back together.

"That's us," I say, trying to keep my voice steady. "Will she be alright?"

"She'll be fine," He says, smiling reassuringly. I nearly fall back into my chair from relief. "We were able to pump the drugs out of her system before it got too serious. She's still asleep, but she should wake up soon. You all can go in."

He bids us goodbye, then walks down the hallway. The four of us misfits walk into the small room. My heart falls at how helpless (Y/N) looks hooked up to those machines.

She still manages to look gorgeous, though.

Nikki pulls up a chair next to the bed. He grabs her hand. They dated a year before we got together. I'm not going to lie when I say I sometimes suspect they still have feelings for each other. . .then again you can't exactly let go of your first love, now can you? Especially when you stay best friends with them.

"What did she overdose on?" Nikki growls.

Oh fuck. I forgot to tell him. He's going to murder me.

"Ecstasy," I say, feeling ashamed. "It's all my fault. She was upset about our fight and gave herself a headache. I was keeping the ecstasy in an aspirin bottle." The tears are coming back. "I shouldn't have gotten so mad at her. This is all my goddamn fault."

Nikki stands up. His chest is heaving up and down. I deserve it if he kills me. I'll take it without a fight.

"YOU'RE GODDAMN RIGHT IT'S YOUR FAULT! HOW COULD YOU JUST KEEP THAT IN THE HOUSE WITHOUT TELLING HER WHAT BOTTLE IT'S IN?!"

"Alright, that's enough, buddy," Vince says, taking Nikki's arm.

"I'M GONNA FUCKING KILL YOU, LEE!" Nikki yells as Vince and Mick drag him out of the room.

"We'll give you kids some time alone," Mick says, shutting the door behind him.

I sit down in the chair Nikki was just in. I grab her hand, rubbing the back of it.

"Baby, please come back to me," I whisper, fresh tears making an appearance. I haven't cried this much. Ever. "I want you so bad. I still need you. I love you so goddamn much. You're my everything, you know that? I'm sorry I'm such a twat. I'll love you better. I promise you that." I lean my head down and kiss the back of her hand.

"You better not fuck that promise up," (Y/N) says suddenly.

My head snaps up. My eyes are met with the most beautiful ones in the world.

"Oh, baby," I say, getting up and hugging her softly. "I'm so sorry, love. I didn't know you'd try to take those pills. I thought you only used the ones on your bedside table or else I would have told you."

She smiles the best she can, trying not to wince. I know her throat hurts. They probably stuck that tube down her throat to get the ecstasy out.

"I couldn't exactly go out of the bathroom, now could I?" She teases, her voice scratchy.

"I'm so sorry."

She shakes her head, cupping my cheek with her hand. "It's alright, Tom."

"No it's not. I shouldn't-."

I'm cut off by her pulling my head down to kiss my lips. I kiss her back, so happy to feel her against me. Alive and breathing. Not dead and gone like I thought she was not even thirty minutes before.

"It's okay, Thomas. If you want to make it up to me, show me how much you love me. Be loyal for once," She says. The hurt is evident in her eyes.

I caused that pain. I hurt the sweetest girl in the world. What the hell is wrong with me.

"I can do that," I say, kissing her again. "I love you so much."

"I love you too, asshole."

Tags:

All fics: @the--blackdahlia @sugar-content @sharon6713 @siliwanoel @charlyallise

Dirt!Tommy: @2dead2function @horrorpxnk

#motley crue #classic rock #rock #rocknroll #rock music #rockband #dirt!tommy lee x reader #dirt!tommy lee #dirt!tommy #dirt!tommy x reader #colson baker #machine gun kelly

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motleyfuckingcruee · 5 years

Text

Close As Strangers (Vince Neil x Reader)

Requested:

@antheasnow

Summary:

Vince calls you one night completely wasted. He ends up cheating on you and you hear it through the phone. Vince does everything in his power to make it up to you.

Warnings:

Fluff, language, angst

Song the title is based off of:

Close As Strangers

REQUESTS ARE OPEN!!!!

COMMENT IF YOU WANT TO BE ON A TAGLIST! OR GO TO MY BIO TO ADD YOURSELF TO ONE!

You throw your bag down on the floor once you get into the house that Vince bought not but four months earlier. He'd only gotten to spend a month in it and then he got sent back onto the road. You miss him a lot. Late night phone calls just aren't working for you anymore. You need him with you now. Holding you. Kissing you. Doing other things to you.

You miss his smile, his laugh, the way he knows how to treat you like a princess even when you're yelling and screaming. Things just aren't the same without him here.

Here recently, every time he calls he's wasted out of his mind or the boys are yelling "hi" at you as you try to talk. Man, you love those idiots, but they're so goddamn annoying. Mick would get them to shut up. Vince just seems distant, and you hate it.

You feel like you did something wrong. Maybe you're being too clingy? Maybe he found someone else? Maybe you weren't doing enough before he left?

So many questions with so little answers.

The phone starts ringing as soon as you sit your ass down on the couch.

"Goddamn it," You mumble.

Nevertheless, your heart beat picks up. You hope it's Vince. You've been missing his voice all day. You get up once again and head to the phone.

"Hello?"

"Hey baby!" Vince slurs. You can see a goofy grin on his face.

"Vince, how wasted are you?" You ask, tired of this.

"None! I'm perfectly fine."

"Vince," You groan.

"Calm down, babe. I'll be home in two weeks," He says.

You feel your mood shoot up. "Really?!" You nearly squeak.

"Yep! I'm coming home baby!" He laughs.

"That's awesome. Vinny, I mi-." You're cut off by the faint sound of a woman's voice. "Vincent who is that?"

It's like he doesn't even hear your question. "Not right now," He says to whoever's in the room.

"Vince-."

"I'm on the phone with my girlfriend," He says, sounding further away from the phone.

"Vince," You say louder.

His voice is muffled. You can't hear a word he's speaking.

Tears spring to your eyes as his soft moans drift through the phone. You hear the woman's voice again. Tears start rolling down your cheeks. You hang up the phone, standing there in shock. You knew something was wrong. Who knows how many times he's cheated on you now?

You feel numb and like you can't move. There's one thing you know for sure. . .you need to get out of this house.

You go upstairs to what used to be you and Vince's room. You pull down you suitcase and start putting your stuff in it as quickly as you can. There's no rush because he won't be home for two weeks, but you just want to get out of here.

An hour later you finish up. You look at the nightstand which has your favorite picture of you and Vince for your two year anniversary.

It has Vince holding you from behind, a huge smile on his lips and his face nuzzled in your neck. Your hands cover his. Your head is turned to look at him and a huge smile is on your lips as well. You both look in love. He's obviously not in love with you if he can cheat on you.

You glare at it. The anger starts coursing through your veins instead of overwhelming sadness. You grab the picture and throw it against the wall with an angry scream escaping your throat. The glass shatters on impact, making it glitter all over the floor.

Your eyes widen. You're not an angry person. You're very calm and don't let anything get to you. This has just sent you over the edge.

You go to start picking it up, but you realize something. He can pick it up his goddamn own. He caused you to feel like this. He can deal with the aftermath.

You pull your suitcase to the front door with bags hanging off your shoulders. You set them down and go back to the phone.you dial your best friend's number.

"Hello?" She answers.

"Hey, Chrissy," You say, trying to keep your voice level. "Would it be alright if I stayed with you for a while?"

"Of course!" She pauses. "Don't you live with Vince?"

"I'll explain later," You say lowly.

"Okay. The front door will be open," She says, not pushing you any further.

"Okay." You hang up the phone.

You go to the front door, picking up the bags you set down and the bag you threw down when you got home. You take one last glance around the house. You look at the pictures of you and Vince. You were so naive. You knew he was a ladies man the moment you laid eyes on him. You were just dumb enough to fall for it.

You walk out of the house, not looking back.

------

Two weeks later and you've finally gotten all your things from Vince's house. Just in time too 'cause you saw Nikki's car with all the boys in it not too far from the house. You really hope none of them recognized you.

You have to go into work today, so that's what you did. You manage a tattoo and piercing shop not too far from Chrissy's house.

You walk in. The smell of rubbing alcohol nearly burns your nose. You make everyone keep the supplies clean. You wouldn't want to get a tattoo that's infected because of the stupidity of the workers. You have no tattoos, which is odd since you work at a tattoo parlor.

You smile at Sebastian and Colin who are sitting at their chairs, ready to work. Sebastian doesn't have any tattoos either, but Colin on the other hand has sleeves.

You go into your office. A shit ton of paperwork is calling your name. You start on it, but you soon hear yelling from outside.

"You can't go in there, dude!" Colin says.

You furrow your eyebrows, but you soon realize who Colin was trying to keep out.

With a head full of teased blonde hair, Vince sits down in the chair in front of your desk.

"`What the fuck are you doing here?" You ask, wanting him to leave immediately.

You hate yourself for this, but you still love him.

"Why's your stuff gone? Is that why you haven't been answering my calls?" He asks. He sounds like he's genuinely confused, but you know that's not the truth.

"I'm supposed to just stay with the guy that cheated on me?" Tears spring to your eyes. If you're not careful, you will have a breakdown.

"I didn't cheat on you," Vince says, laughing as if it's a joke.

"Yes you fucking did. You fucked her while I was still on the phone!"

His eyes widen as if his memory was finally coming back. "I was wasted, (Y/N). I had no clue what I was doing."

"How could you forget me when I was on the goddamn phone?" You ask.

"I'm sorry. It was an accident."

"How can you accidentally put your dick inside of someone?" You laugh bitterly.

"I'm so sorry, baby. I lo-."

"Don't you fucking say those three words. If you really did love me you wouldn't have been unfaithful," You say, tears rolling down your cheeks. "Get the fuck out of here. I don't want to see you again."

He doesn't say anything. He looks at you with sad eyes. He gets up and leaves without another word. Once the door shuts, you allow yourself to breakdown.

You let out all the tears you'd been holding in. Fucking hell.

------

Two weeks pass. Everywhere you go, Vince seems to be there. He'd beg you to go back to him. You wish that he'd just leave you alone. You want to forget him. At one point he even sent you a hundred roses to Chrissy's house. She told you to go back to you. She said it's obvious that he's still in love with you. You almost gave in. Almost.

You get back to Chrissy's place absolutely exhausted. You'd given so many piercings today along with a mountain of paperwork. You just wanted to sleep.

However, Chrissy left you a note on the coffee table.

Meet me down at the beach. We're going to have dinner on the sand tonight. -xx Chrissy

You sighed. Maybe that will help you de-stress. One can only hope. And with that, you go back out the house and to the beach.

Fifteen minutes later, and you arrive there. You get out, looking for Chrissy. Her black hair is hard to see, but you instantly spot the nearly neon shirt she's wearing.

She walks over to you, linking her arm through yours. She starts pulling you down the beach.

"So, what are we eating? I'm starving," You say, forcing a smile.

"You'll see it's a surprise," She grins.

You groan. "I don't like surprises."

"You'll like this one."

She stops at a path that's covered with roses.

"You finally proposing to me?" You laugh, confused.

She laughs, pushing you to go down the path. You do so, looking around at the gorgeous layout.

You finally arrive at a canopy tent thing. You aren't sure what they're called. Standing i front of it is none other than Vince Neil. You cover your mouth with your hand. This is amazing.

"Vince," You breathe out.

He walks over and grabs both of your hands. "D'you like it?"

You nod, completely speechless. No one has ever done something like this for you before.

"I'm sorry. I really am. I was being an idiot. As soon as I realized you weren't going to come back, I felt like there was a piece of me missing. You're my other half. You're my girl. I love you so much. Seeing the way I hurt you, it killed me. I'm so, so sorry. Can you forgive me?"

You look into his eyes you can tell he means it. "Yes. I love you too."

He kisses you deeply. His hands rest on your hips as he pulls you closer. You wrap your arms around his neck. He smiles into the kiss, which makes you smile.

He pulls away. "Now that that's settled, let's eat. I'm starving!"

Tags:

All fics: @the--blackdahlia @sugar-content @sharon6713 @siliwanoel @charlyallise

Vince: @moon-beame

#motley crue #classic rock #rock #rocknroll #rock music #rockband #vince neil #fanfic #fanfiction #reader #reader insert #vince neil x reader #vince x reader #one shot

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