#and had significant time to scroll my phone and play with my dog

[dragons-and-yellow-roses]

.

[jaetyun]

Finding out they’re not your Boys Planet picks; a thread! (k group ver!)

s.hanbin, gunwook, seunghwan, junhyeon x gn!reader

genre: fluff (it’s suggestive with seunghwan but nothing actually happens)

a/n: i’m soz it’s so short! i was v busy and had little time to write more. i will be making plenty more parts, rest assured! tysm to my fave anon for the req 🫶

after the first elimination, the air was tense. you could glance around the room and see everyones heads hanging low, losing motivation to work. reluctantly, mnet decided to give them a day out. visit family, walk your dog, run away to another country while you still have the chance, the choice was theirs! some trainees decided to see their significant others, only to find out their first picks!! spoilers: it wasnt them 😔

trainees after the cut!!

Sung Hanbin

the moment the boy left the building, he began giggling. he quickly dialed your number, giving it a ring.

“hello? who is this?”

“psst! it’s your #1 boys planet pick..” he whispered with a goofy smile, his hand up to the speaker of the device as if he was talking on a walkie-talkie

“kim jiwoong? how’d you get my number?!” your innocent joke made hanbins smile drop, losing all the childish love-drunk emotions as before. “nevermind. i was planning to surprise you with dinner but you should just go with jiwoong.” though you couldnt see him, you already knew the face he was making. to a *tea*. with his tongue stuck out, following by a whiny pout that you couldn’t help but gush over.

“baby, you know i was playing. come over!”

hanbin narrowed his eyes, his pout getting replaced by a thin line. “is he actually your first though?”

“well… that’s-“

you were immediately left with the call hanging up, making you groan. you held you phone away from you, counting to 5 with your other hand before you felt a familiar vibration.

“why didn’t you call me back to beg for a second chance?”

“i didnt have to.”

“just like you didnt have to vote for me?”

you sighed out, sending an unimpressed face through the screen (that hanbin definitely picked up on!) and clicked your tongue.

“sung hanbin. you’re over 70 countries first pick!”

“i don’t want 70 countries, i want you~“

you sighed at his comment, laughing lightheartedly before cracking another joke (he seems not to appreciate your humor these days!)

“what so if you ranked second but i was voting for you, you’d be okay?”

“…”

neither of you were particularly good at lying. often times it was great for communication! but a lot of times, it means petty back-and-forth’s like this.

“baby, i am voting for you. but the app makes you vote 6 people”

“blocking you as we speak..” he whined, very unsatisfied with your response. you began softly mumbling ‘nooooo!’

“okay okay! you can take his place as my first pick.”

“…and you have to stop voting him!”

“babbyyyyy :((”

hanbin scoffed, pulling the phone from his ear yet again. “beep beep beep!”

“okayyyy!! i’ll stop voting for kim jiwoong.”

he smiled, now suddenly going back to his gushy nature. “if you say so~ you excited to see me?”

you were happy to have your puppy-like boyfriend back, humming a response.

“so excited! were are going?”

Kum Junhyeon

when you heard a knock at the door, you curiously looked through the peephole. who would show up at this hour? you swore you didn’t have any packages. your eyes light up, immediately opening up the door and embracing an exhausted hyeon.

“how did you get here?” was the first question you managed, running your fingers through his hair. he muttered something about an off day and you chose not to question it.

“youre just in time, i was just getting around to voting” you hummed, gesturing to the couch where the mnet app was open. you began your routine you’ve been doing since the voting first opened, scrolling through the trainees clearly on a mission to find someone specific. junhyeon peered from behind your shoulder, smiling at how cute you looked as you proudly voted for your boyfriend.

“wait! i was right there” he pointed to his name, chuckling at the way you began scrolling back over to his name. his smile faded quickly though, watching as you clicked gyuvins name and scrolled past. he then chuckled at you again, shaking his head before resting it on your shoulder. “kum. not kim you goof”

he felt your shoulder tense, making him smile at the way you sheepishly went back to his name, voting him instead of replacing gyuvin. junhyeon tilted his head unsuspectingly. “did you mean to vote gyuvin too?”

“i uh.. actually forgot to vote for you.. but its just-”

“do you not vote for me?” his eyebrows furrowed, raising his head off your shoulder suspiciously.

“well no! its just, i was just trying to get gyu-“

“so gyuvin is your first pick??”

you stammered, unsure of how to respond. junhyeon pouted, shaking your shoulders in an attempt to get a word out of you.

“well he’s cute!”

“am i not?”

“you’re.. getting there” you pinched his cheek, making him tilt his head in confusion.

“getting there?”

you began mocking his “junhyeon is fiveeeee” making jun look at you with 😐

“so im cringey and gyuvin is really cute?”

“….”

junhyeon grabbed your phone from you, resetting the vote and picking himself. he furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, pointing the phone at you. “why cant i submit?” you attempted to grab the phone only to have him yank it away from you.

“you have to vote 6! not just you.”

you watched as he began randomly clicking trainees, submitting it for you before you could argue. you could only sigh, gently taking his hand in yours.

“nice to see again you too i guess.”

Park Gunwook

after planning a meetup, you decided on a cute park to waltz around in. gunwook had showed up first, kicking rocks while scanning the area every so often for you. the moment gunwook locked his eyes on you, he wrapped an arm around your shoulder with a grin.

“miss me?”

“of course i did! ive been watching just for you, i’m proud of you so far” you kissed his cheek, making gunwook do that smug grin he always does. that was all the push he needed to keep working hard. the image of you watching him excitedly and reacted at everything he said made gunwook giddy, already ready for his next mission to impress you more.

as the two of you continued walking, gunwook suddenly looked to you with a sympathetic pout. “you know, i kinda feel bad for you.”

you wordlessly tilted your head, wanting to hear an elaboration.

“it must be so boring watching each episode when there‘s nobody that even compares to me” he sighed out dramatically, looking off into the distance as if he was saying it to some hidden camera. you laughed, hitting his shoulder lightly. gunwook doesn’t relent, staying in character effortlessly as he continued what he was doing.

“am i right?”

“not really. there’s matthew.”

gunwook stopped what he was doing, sending you flying backwards with the sudden halt. he then sat in silence, trying to process this new information.

“oh.. matthew…. yeah him…” he pretended to ponder this for a second, his eyes looking up as he slowly nodded. what he was thinking of exactly, you weren’t sure. he then shrugged in an attempt at nonchalance.

“that kid-“

“he’s older than you..”

“that adult, is like, really weak. i beat him in arm wrestling easily” he continued, flexing his arm to further show off.

“that’s not why i like him babe.”

“it’s not??” his eyebrows furrowed in confusion. not in a condescending manner, gunwook was genuinely confused as to how that has nothing to do with matthews appeal. you laugh, shaking your head softly.

“then why??”

you began to mimic the iconic ‘i love you, i want you, seok matthew’ hand gesture only for gunwook to start groaning in annoyance. he waved his hand, an ‘oh please’ expression. he then did his signature salute, shaking his hand dramatically as a reference to when his hand had a tremor from nervousness. you hit his shoulder, laughing lightheartedly.

“baby. i mean he’s cute.”

“well.. i *am* younger than him..” he says, twisting your words on you. gunwook began raising his hands, but before he could even raise them above his chest you gently held them with your own, stopping whatever aegyo he was about to do.

“you are plenty cute gunwook.” his eyes furrowed, clearly unsatisfied.

“if i’m stronger, and cuter than him. then why aren’t i your favorite??”

“who said anything about favorites?” you asked him with a pout.

“well is he?”

“…”

“see!” he whined, dramatically walking off with small stomps.

you followed up after him, giving him a free teasing pokes to his arm. “is my baby jealous??”

“am not!”

“yuh-huh!” you teased further, making him scoff at even the idea of being jealous.

“let me show you how… how.. unbothered i an by this!”

he then grabbed your hand (in a *totally* non jealous way!) and dragged you with him as you continued to waltz around the park.

“it’s okay gunwook~ he may be my favorite trainee but there’s no replacing you!”

“there better not be.” he mumbled, giving you a slight side eye. he then paused, turning around to face you and before pointing at your face.

“…. but i’m not jealous!”

Lee Seunghwan

you had decided to wait for him outside of the building, the butterflies you had forgotten about creeping up onto you when you finally saw him again. his eyes lit up, quickly embracing you as if the world was gonna crash any second. you kissed both his cheeks, smiling at his usual clingy behavior.

“you’ve been having fun?” seunghwan pouts, shaking his head quickly.

“oh baby it’s terrible, only you could fix the stress i have right now” he slyly wrapped his arm around your waist. you sighed, but did nothing to stop his roaming hands. seunghwan buried himself in your neck, trailing soft love bites all over your neck and collar bone.

“really? in public hwan?”

he let out a bitter laugh. “after those trainees, i need some stress relief.”

you clicked your tongue, gently combing through his hair.

“you mean daeul and junhyeon?”

“you’ve been watching??” he looks up at you, a shocked expression. you could only nod at him, continuing your soothing motion with your hands. “i actually really like them! especially daeul.”

seunghwan narrowed his eyes at you, looking at you hesitantly. he was quite offended honestly! how could you like daeul after the side eyes he sent the boys way..

“what? more than me?” you sat there and thought about it, which only offended your boyfriend further. “i was joking babe.”

“shh! i’m thinking!” he rolled his eyes, taking your hand off his scalp. he mouthed dramatically ‘WERE. OVEERRRR’ making you click your tongue again.

“babe! it’s not that big of a deal”

“it is though, cause what do you mean you can’t pick between your *boyfriend*… and daeul” you stammered, trying to defend yourself

“well he’s just cute!”

“can he sing as well as me?”

“well no but-“

“can he dance as well as me?”

“i mean no..”

“can he rap as well as me?”

“… no…”

“and is he better looking than i am?” seunghwan finished, an expecting look. you pouted, shaking your head slowly. he joined you, shaking his head much faster than you.

“so why is it a hard choice?”

you stuttered again, avoiding eye contact. “you’re just jealous!”

he gently grabbed onto your waist again, bringing you closer. “yes. i am. im not sharing you with anyone else. not even hanbin” he said, *finally* walking you away from the entrance of the building. you continued to bicker with him, punching him on the arm at one point. he stuck his tongue out, not even able to blow a raspberry before you touched the tip of your tongues together jokingly. his grip your waist tightened, with his eyebrows furrowing.

“i’ll *show* you why i’m better than lee daeul.”

“in public??”

[ikeromantic]

Playing His Part

A Mitsuhide Akechi fanfiction. This scene is set well after the events of the romantic epilogue and features Mitsuhide and MC in a modern setting extended story. Approx. 1200 words.

First: Mitsuhide and the Maiden

Previous: Enemy at the Gates

Mitsuhide sat in the sterile waiting room, glancing out at the view of the city below. Clearly, everything here was meant to leave him feeling unsettled and in awe of the man that could command such a space. But he was not easily impressed and these minor discomforts were nothing to the horrors he’d lived through. 

He felt the phone in his pocket buzz. Once. Twice. Again. Annoyed, he took it out to turn it off. This instant communication had its uses but it could interrupt at the worst times. The messages were from Sasuke and Miyake. They wouldn’t write unnecessarily. His eyes scanned the text. An attack at the hospital. Everyone safe. The enemy, a false doctor, escaped. 

It seemed he would have little time to cut the head off this snake. So be it. 

The door to Tanaka’s office slid open. The space beyond was brightly lit and dripped with color. Jewel tones of ruby and sapphire and emerald. A palette of rich, deep colors that plaid out in harmony across a variety of antique vases, silk scrolls, and paintings. It was, after the relentless white of the waiting area, almost blinding. Mitsuhide might have appreciated the ploy, had he not been the intended victim.

Still, he played his part, glancing around with genuine surprise as he entered the hallowed space.

Tanaka himself was less impressive. Balding and slightly overweight, he sat behind the desk like an ōgama from a folktale. All the toad needed was a spear and rainbow breath to convince Mitsuhide he was dealing with a yokai and not a man at all. He did not get up, only eyed the kitsune warlord the way one might a dog that has just shat on the floor.

Mitsuhide bowed low. It was always wiser to appear less to a man that tried so hard to appear regal. “Tanaka-san, thank you for seeing me on such short notice.”

He nodded, his expression grim. “What is this about?”

“I wanted to come to you directly with this information.” Mitsuhide began to spin his story for the crime boss. A tale of missing shipments, faked payments, secret books. And the honey atop it all, the bait to catch a snake. “I noted there is a significant shipment going out tomorrow night. It’s nowhere in the reports sent to your office, but I have the dock reservation, the driver payment . . .” He let his voice trail off as if nervous. 

Tanaka’s lips were a thin, pale line. His jaw jutted out and his eyebrows drew down heavily. “I assume you have proof?”

“Yes, Tanaka-san. I can send it at your word. I didn’t want to accidentally alert anyone to my knowledge as I don’t know who is involved.” Mitsuhide stumbled over the words, gripping his clothes tightly. It was tempting to end this now. To leap across the desk and strangle this man, this villain, that caused him so much pain already. But he would not likely survive the attack, even if he took Tanaka with him. That was not acceptable. He must live, if only to kiss his little one when her eyes opened again.

“That was . . . wise.” He steepled his fingers. “Why don’t I know you? Juni? That was your name?”

“Akechi Jūbei. I’m only a low level accountant, sir. I would not expect you to know me. Had this theft not been so . . . clear . . . I would never have put myself before you.” Mitsuhide bowed again.

“Provide this data to Ana. She will review it and let me know if you are wrong. For your sake, I hope you are not. For mine,” Tanaka chuckled, “I hope you are.”

Mitsuhide was led from the room a few moments later by Ana. They entered the elevator and got off at the 10th floor. 

“This will be your room while I verify your information.” She gestured to a small, basic apartment. It had a bed, a television, a toilet, and a sink. Barely enough space to turn around in, but better than a hole in the ground.

“Thank you, Miss Ana. I’ll send you the files now.” Mitsuhide sent the signal to Souta and hoped again the boy’s talent matched his ambition. 

She nodded and shut the door. It locked behind her, which was expected. He didn’t mind much. The lock was a temporary annoyance. Even now, Daiki was faking his way onto a security detail while Itsuko joined a janitorial crew, and Souta would be here shortly as IT support. The building would be infiltrated and Tanaka’s vulnerabilities made plain. 

This was always the hardest part of any plan. Waiting. Mitsuhide laid down and shut his eyes. At first, he tried to focus on the details of their plot. What could happen, what should. But the darkness behind his eyelids was haunted by his little mouse. He missed her so badly he ached. Only a few days had passed but it felt a lifetime. 

Though he would never admit to it, he imagined her warmth pressed against him. The sound of her steady breath in the cool, dry air of this room. It calmed him, just a little. He did not sleep, but he did relax. Waiting until the workday ended and night fell.

No one came for him. They did not bring him food or water or check to see if he was still in his room. Mitsuhide sat up and pretended to turn on the television. He used it to hide his quick check for where the camera in this room was placed. It was above the door, barely visible but for a tiny gleam from the lens.

He checked his phone, knowing none of his team would write him here, where it might be observed. But an accountant would check his phone. Then he stood and went to the door. Tried to open it. Knocked. “Hello? Excuse me! I would like to get some food!”

Mitsuhide kept this up for several minutes until someone came. He timed it. Eight minutes to react. Distance? Or lack of concern? It was hard to be sure. 

“I would like something to eat,” he told the guard. A young man with a pale face and wide eyes. He looked like a conscript. Barely into adulthood and already in a bad place. 

“There’s no food on this floor.”

Mitsuhide frowned. “I’m very sorry to bother you with this, but I have been in here for hours! Surely I could get something? A vending machine? Delivery?”

The guard shook his head. “I’m sorry but no.”

“What if we split it? I could pay and we could share a snack together. I bet you’re hungry too.”

“I -” The guard glanced up and down the hall. “There is a vending machine on the second floor.”

Mitsuhide shoved some money into his hand. “Get whatever you like. I’m not picky.” He took advantage of the motion to hook the small, magnetic key on the guard’s wrist. 

“Fine. But don’t make any noise while I run downstairs. The other guard will come and we will both be in trouble.”

“Of course.” Mitsuhide smiled. “I don’t want to make trouble for either of us.” He hid the key up his sleeve smoothly.

This was proving to be a useful night. He had an entry key for at least the first ten floors, an avenue to blackmail Miss Ana, and he now knew the guards worked in pairs. Yes. A fruitful mission all around. The lines of his plot were firming in his mind.

Next: Serendipity

[huazibae]

been looking over our pictures and videos and i can't help but think nga best foot forward ka lang sa una. very ma effort. after 1 year, wala na dayon? why? bcos i'm just your lowkey girlfriend nalang? it makes me feel like you're not in love with me anymore. we used to video call all the time, even when i'm studying, even when you're sleeping. what happened? kabalo ka gid bala love nga time lang gid kag effort ginapangayo ko simo. you don't even have to spend money. kasakit lang nga sagay ko hmbal sa imo, himuon mo lg kaisa dayon the day after kalimtan mo na dayon.

tudluan ta pa ka paano? can't you find a way? don't you love me enough to do it? bcos "pag gusto may paraan, pag ayaw maraming dahilan", right? indi time management problem sa imo, it's commitment. if you're really my boyfriend, please act like it. i know you have a life outside this relationship, i know you have you priorities and responsibilities and whatever. pero gin miga mo ko. that should mean something. i'm important, too. and i hate that kinanlan ko pa ihmbal sa imo nga ari ko di para lang madumduman mko.

as a friend, this is my advice:

1. indi ka katawag kung ara si kuya mo sa kwarto mo? then gwa. may tawo gyapon? find a fucking place then. find the time. is a 30 minute undistracted video call too much to ask?

2. when you invite me to do things with you but forget? ibutang sa notes mo, set up a reminder. kesa magtulukay lg ta mag vc, bisan 30 min nalang napangayo ko hu, make it worth it man.

3. love language: quality time. how? hagara ko maglntaw ta movie and actually finish watching it. vc while doing our own thing. play online games. set up a time maka vc ta and talk together, bisan 30 minutes lang. learn to play the games i like bcos i play with you and your friends.

4. pay attention sa mga ginahmbal ko nga gusto ko that way kabalo ka sang ihatag sakon sunod. a bracelet? really? if it isn't obvious to you yet, i'm a sentimental person. bisan bato lg ginhatag mo sakon pero ginhmbal mo nga may significant meaning na, i would've liked it more. there wasn't even an explanation as to why you gave me a bracelet. you just assumed i would like it bcos it's jewelry and i'm a girl, amu na? an example of a gift: maco had plans to give a girl a necklace with a pendant that has a picture of her and her dog. why? bcos she loves that dog and maco knows that. another example: me giving you a wallet bcos you complained yours was old & damaged and you needed a new one. i don't even need a wallet or a necklace. give me a shell and tell me it reminded you of me and i'd keep it forever. it's the THOUGHT that counts. panumduma mn ko.

5. set a time na makastoryahanay ta without any distractions. is that too much to ask? you reply slow and i notice it. bisan mag vc ta ga scroll ka. you're not giving me your 100% undivided attention and it hurts. gaka tempt ko magbalos. how? example: 10 minutes before ka nagreply, okay so ma reply ko sa 30 min after. yes hungdon ko dugayon magreply to see if magkalabot ka, pero wala. another example: ma scroll ka? oki me too. then nd ka pagsapakon sa call.

6. no conversation starters? talk ta sa gab'e and in that day, ilista sa notes mo ang mga natabo sa adlaw mo nga gusto istorya sakon. is 30 min of undistracted talk too much to ask? am i that boring that after every reply masaylo ka dayon sa lain na app until you forget to reply to me? if you're talking to someone and they keep looking at their phone, isn't that rude? indi man sakit nga indi interesado ang ginastorya mo sa imo? ubusa nalng anay tanan mo nga scrolling time kag tanan mo nag ulubrahon. i'm saying okay lang nga ipaulihit mo ko pero tani nd man ko pagkalimti. you spend too much time sa everything else, you forget about me. daw mabalos ko. gamay nalang gid nga push mabalos nako.

7. i do not feel seen. why? do you not feel the cold replies? the slightest changes? are you that oblivious or do you not just care enough? PAY ATTENTION. ask what's wrong with me. ik it's my job to communicate to you how i feel kag nd ka manogpakot, pero tani mn lg ma notice mo that not i'm not okay and care enough to ask. also, kadamo bala sakon gina send sa imo na post tapos isa lang sapakon mo? bisan react nalang tani. huhu. gaka hurt ko na daw wala mo ya gina sapak bisan amu nalang na. yes, ik it's a small thing. yes, oa ko. can you handle it or not?

8. if you care enough, ask about my cycle and also keep track of it. so you'd know when to not piss me off.

9. when you say you'll do things with me or anything related to me, ibutang sa notes mo para indi mo malimtan. example: naghmbal ka mahmbal ka na if ma post ka kpop girls, was that a one time thing lg? from the conversation we had daan abi ko many times mo himuon. MAKE IT CLEAR. yes it's a small thing but doesn't it say something nga nadumduman ko gane pero ikaw wala? CRAZY. another example: the notes i gave you, i thought you were going to open one everyday. scam? nalimtan naman? exactly what the notes/reminders are for. use it.

10. it's also crazy that you keep planning things na himuon ta maglagaw but magkitaay na ta gani mangkuton mo naman ko ano gusto ko himuon. if ginhagad mko, plan the fucking date. and make sure YOU HAVE THE TIME. kasakit paasahon. yes i still can't get over the time na ginpaasa mko. why? bcos you haven't make up for it.

11. you offered to be my "pahuway", then be one for real. when i'm with you, gusto ko ikaw na ang bahala sa akon. i want you to comfort me. i want you to be present. i want you to pay attention. i want you to care. ipabatyag man sakon nga palangga mko. anhon ko na mga i love you mo kung wala ko man gakabatyagan? just bcls you love me doesn't mean i feel it.

12. EFFORT. ATTENTION. TIME. tani wala ka nalang nag super effort sa una, para indi nako sagay reklamo subong. consistency, love. you know that's how i fell in love with you. you shouldn't have set the bar that high. subong kung ano nalang makwa ko simo, bisan bare minimum, g nlg gyapon ah. AT LEAST, diba?

13. take pictures. of me. of us. candid. posed. how? care enough to find out. check the pinterest board we share. yes, this is me asking to do the extra mile.

do i need to call you out everytime you mess up?

as your girlfriend, all i can say is that i don't want us to be over. i don't want our relationship to end. amu na grabe gid pilit ko simo magtadlong. pero even that sounds wrong, bcos if palangga mo gid ko, ngaa kinanlan dal'on ka pa sa pilit? basi indi mo lg gid ko guro amu na ka palangga para mag effort as much as you did before. ano kulang ko love man? ano gid ang wala sa akon love haw? anong sala? ngaa daw nd mo gid ko kaya palanggaon the way i needed to be loved? am i too much? sobra2 gid ginapangayo ko? nakapoy ka na sakon? nakwa mo na tanan na gusto mo sakon? natak'an ka na? indi mo na ko kaya? gusto mo nga mag break na ta? ako gid bala nagpakita sa imo kung ano ang tuod nga pagpalangga? na crush mo gid mn ko sang elementary? importante gid man ko sa imo? nahadlok ka man nga madula ko? do you really care about me? ga stay ka nalang kay naluoy ka sakon? kadamo gid pamangkot sa utok ko love. despite that, nd ko kaya bayaan ka. nd ko kaya nga ako naman mamaya. nd ko kaya nga ako una masuko. so i won't. indi tka pagbayaan. i'm staying. i'll take the risk. bisan sakit. bisan kapoy. kay palangga taka. kay palangga ta gid ka.

i'm sorry if this is too much.

[outerbankspreferences]

50 Wordless Ways To Say I Love You - Drew Starkey

#22. Listening to them while they vent

Word Count: 1930

MASTERLIST

SERIES MASTERLIST

 It had been three weeks since you and Drew had officially gone public with your relationship. It was something he was more nervous about then you. Drew had watched firsthand the struggle Rudy and Elaine went through and he didn’t want to expose you to that form of hate. The two of you had talked about before, but Drew was always hesitant insisting you guys wait.

 At first you thought he might be embarrassed of you and your relationship. You weren’t famous, and you didn’t really enjoy all the attention on social media. That’s what made you agree to go on date with Drew in the first place. He wasn’t stuck up and posting his whole life on social media like everyone else.

 You had assured Drew that you would be fine, and you wouldn’t let the hateful comments get to you. In all honesty, you hadn’t really expected to get much hate. You figured that there would be some, everyone loved Drew, but you were hoping that his fans were able to see how happy you guys were together. Both Elaine and Maddie C. had warned you not to be naïve about it, but you were too stubborn to listen.

 You and Drew had both made a post to your social media accounts of pictures you had taken together through quarantine and filming season two. You had also gone ahead and made all your social media public, so if his fans wanted to, they could follow you too. All your friends had congratulated you guys, and Drew’s cast mates did the same thing.

 The day after you guys had gone public you had checked your Instagram in the morning like you always did and noticed that lots of people had commented on the pictures you guys had posted. Not half as many commented on yours as they did Drew’s and when you felt happy when you first started reading the comments. Most of them were wonderful and kind while others were hateful. You brushed off the mean comments and choose to reply to some of his fans that were being kind to you guys.

 Drew had figured that with all the hype of filming for season two coming to an end, your guy’s relationship would be the last thing the fans cared about. He worried about you and didn’t want to see you hurt over what people would say. He had heard the horror stories from Rudy and Chase about how much hate their significant others went through, and he didn’t want to risk that for you.

 Drew had kept a close eye on you for the first couple weeks to make sure you weren’t spending too much time on your phone. He also always checked your social media and the comments, coming to your defense if needed. He knew firsthand how easy it was to fall down a rabbit hole of reading hateful comments about yourself and what it can do to your self esteem. All the cast had kept a close eye on you. You were the only one who never used Instagram, and they all knew how much you hated the attention on yourself so when you guys started to go public Drew had asked them to discretely keep a close on eye you when he couldn’t.

 Maddie B. had brought it up one night when you were over at her place for wine. The two of you had been talking when you checked a notification on your phone assuming it was Drew, but Maddie watched the way your face dropped when you looked at your phone. “Is everything okay?” She asked completely forgetting what she had been talking about.

 You moved around in your seat pulling your knees to your chest. “Uh yeah fine, I guess. Just the hate gets to be too much I guess.” You spoke up suddenly becoming much more interested in your drink. “Have you talked to Drew about any of this?” She questioned farther. “No, I told him I would be fine if we went public. I just don’t want to upset him, y’know?” You responded almost questioning you reasoning. “I think you should say something to him about it, he’ll understand Y/N.” Whether you said anything to Drew or not, Madison would, so you took the easy way out and decided to talk to him about.

 When you got home, Drew was sitting on the couch playing a video game with Austin. The two of them were hollering at the television when you got into the apartment. Nether had noticed you even came until you dropped your bag on the couch next to Austin. “Jesus Christ Y/N. you gave me a heart attack.” Austin chuckled to himself, before moving over so you could sit between them. “Sorry, what are you guys playing?” You asked grabbing at the bag of chips that they had been eating. “Call of Duty (sorry I don’t play video games, it’s the only one I know lol)” Drew spoke up shifting so you could lean into his chest.

 You watched the two of them play for a little while when you decided to take a shower. You and Drew lived in separate apartments, but you had kept some of your things over at his place for when you spent the night. “I’m going to get in the shower.” You spoke kissing Drew in the cheek before getting up. “Do you mind getting me another drink before you go love?” Drew asked giving you his best puppy dog eyes. You smirked at him, “yeah of course, you want one too Aust?” You asked the blonde next to you. “No, I’m good, thanks though.”

 Once you got his drink you headed towards Drew’s room to grab some clothes. You figured a hot shower would make you feel better and then you could finally talk to Drew about what was going on. You turned the water on and waited for the bathroom to heat up before hopping in the shower. Once you got in you realized that you didn’t have any shampoo or conditioner at Drew’s place. You sighed before grabbing his and using that instead. You stood there letting the water roll down your face, your mind wandering to a place you were trying to avoid. All the comments you had read coming back to you and you hadn’t realized you were crying until your eyes started to burn. It was one of those silent sobs not wanting the boys to hear you.

 Once you got out you dried yourself off before changing into your shorts and one of Drew’s t-shirts. You looked in the mirror, wiping your face with a cold cloth trying to cool your skin so it didn’t look like you had just cried your eyes out. You took a deep shaky breath before opening the bathroom door. You looked down the hallway and the apartment was now dark and you assumed everyone had gone to bed, so you head towards Drew’s room. You opened the door to see Drew laying on his bed shirtless. “How was you shower bub?” He asked scrolling through his phone. “Uh- it was good, but I didn’t have any shampoo left so I used yours. I hope that’s okay.” You spoke throwing your clothes in the laundry basket. “If it was such a nice shower, why were you crying?” Drew asked and he didn’t need to see you to know you were caught in a lie. He had walked by the bathroom planning on joining you when he heard your quite sobs. He decided to let you have your moment and question you when you got out. It broke his heart to watch you hide your feelings from him. “I got soap in my eyes.” You lied even though you knew he wouldn’t believe you. “A lot of crying for soap in your eyes. Please Y/N, talk to me. I just want to help.” Drew spoke softly, getting up from the bed coming over to you.

 He wrapped his arms around you from behind, placing his head on your shoulder inhaling the smell of his shampoo in your hair. “You can trust me I just want to help you.” He whispered into your skin. That was all it took for you to lose it all over again, crying for the second time that night. This time it wasn’t silent, it was loud and broke Drew’s heart all over again. Your body went weak into his and he sat you both on the floor while you cried into his neck. Austin had heard the commotion from his room and ran in only to see you being held tightly in Drew’s grip. Austin gave his friend and understanding nod, and slowly closed the door giving you two some space. You clung onto Drew like he was going to slip away any second. “Please love, you’re scaring me. What’s wrong.” He spoke softly not wanting to overwhelm you.

 “I don’t know what I did Drew. I tried so hard to get them to like me. I thought posting pictures of us together and pictures of you would make them happy. I thought they would be happy for us. I thought it wouldn’t bother me, and now it’s all I can do is read everything they’re saying about me. I mean they’ve been saying awful things. And I just don’t know what I did to them.” You got out over choked sobs and long stutters.

 Drew didn’t need to wonder who you were talking about he had seen some of the comments on your social media. He figured if it was something you couldn’t handle that you would come to him but clearly, he was wrong. He was angry with himself for not seeing that you were hurting, and angry at his so called ‘fans’ for treating you the way they had. He sat quietly waiting for you to calm down again. He didn’t know how long he had been sitting there for when your breathing had normalled. When he thought that it was okay to speak, he took your face gently in his hands guiding you to look at him, “oh baby, it’s okay. I wish you would have come to me sooner. I could’ve helped you.” He spoke softly as too not overwhelm you more. “What can I do to help you?” He asked searching your eyes for answer but all he could find were tears.

 “Just hold me please. I just want to be with you.” You whispered, and despite the hot tears running down your face Drew placed a soft kiss to your lips. Drew wrapped his arms around your waist in a tight grip moving you guys to his bed while you clung onto him like koala. Once he got you both settled comfortably, he spoke again, “what they’re saying about you isn’t true Y/N. They don’t know you like I do, like we all do. You’re the kindest person I’ve ever met. Please don’t believe what they’re saying. They’re just jealous of how amazing, talented and beautiful you are my love.” His words almost made you start to cry again, and you could tell how sincere he was being. You snuggled your head further into his chest and inhaled his comforting scent. “I love you, Drew.” You whispered and thought maybe he didn’t hear you, but his grip tightens around you and he kissed the top of your head. “I love you too beautiful.”

TAGLIST: @lemur46 @taylathornton @drewstarkeysbitchh @jjmaybankzz

[puckyess]

4 Times His Teammates Said “I Love You” + 1 Time He Did | Ryder Donovan

S/o to @penaltbox for being my favorite brainstorm partner and encouraging the hell out of me. Inspo: @that-fandom-stuck-in-your-head 

I found the one TikTok that was deleted, so now all TikToks are linked!!

** FEEDBACK IS APPRECIATED **

Words: 7.5k

Shay Donovan 

You weren’t allowed to have favorites on the team outside of Ryder, but if you did it would be Shay hands down. The relationship you had with him was like that of a brother. He watched out for you and you for him. You’d play the part of his best wingwoman and he supported your relationship with his brother. You’d fight like siblings too. He knew exactly which buttons to press and you knew how to get under his skin. You knew each other well and this is what made you two Ryder’s worst nightmare. You constantly ganged up on him with his brother. You were able to get Ryder to do/fall for just about anything and that made you Shay’s favorite secret weapon.

The boys had some free time this weekend and wanted to make the 5 hour drive to Duluth to spend it on their boat since it would probably be one of the last times they would get to do so with the season ramping up. Ryder’s annoyance for you and Shay began promptly at 6 a.m. He was not a morning person and you definitely weren’t either, but Shay insisted you both get up early so that you get to the boat at a decent time in the day. He did not however, set his alarm for 6 a.m., rather 6 p.m. and was awoken by his brother’s shouts to get out of bed. You, on the other hand, were just running late because you thought you could get ready in a shorter amount of time than was realistic. By the time you and Shay make it down to Ryder, who already has the car packed and ready to go, he’s huffy. “You guys know I hate when you tell me a specific time and then you show up late”.  “Well this should be a fun trip, right Rizzer?”, Shay speaks up with fake enthusiasm. You shoot Shay a look from the front seat as a signal to shut the hell up, to which Ryder appreciates.

The first hour is pretty smooth, not a whole lot of talking going on in the car. Everyone just appreciating the sunrise, or at least that’s what you thought until you glanced in the backseat and saw Shay sound asleep. At your “awh” Ryder moved his eyes from the road to the rear view mirror. “So that’s why it’s been so peaceful”. Even though you laughed you gave Ryder’s hand that was on your thigh a light squeeze. “Don’t be so grumpy Rydes. This is going to be a fun weekend, I just know it”. He can hear the smile in your voice without even looking over and he knows you’re right, flashing you his signature bright smile of his own.

As if he knew he was being talked about, Shay begins to stir. The quietness is disturbed immediately upon his awakening. He takes over the AUX and the road tripping can finally begin. Him and Ryder argue over music, whether to play alternative or country and which has more of a summer vibe, until finally a summer playlist, containing both is chosen. You pick up your phone, scrolling through some Tiktoks when you find one you just have to send to Shay. You watch as he gets the notification and opens it immediately. The music is broken up, replaced with the voice of a guy saying, “Send this to someone you don't like. You look like a rat, and you are so fat. I would be so sad, if i looked like that”. You’re dying laughing in the front seat at the offended look on Shay’s face and the death glare he’s receiving from Ryder. “I hate you” is all Ryder spits out, as this is a regular occurrence in any car ride. You love how you can get Shay in trouble without even really trying and how Ryder only yells at his brother when you’re the one who sent it to him.

The rest of the ride is spent on the highway and though you love the singing of the boys in the car with you, you’re getting pretty bored just watching the trees pass by so you say, “Let’s play a game!”. They both look at you like you’re 12.

“What? It’ll be fun I promise”. They shoot you skeptical looks, but ask what the game is anyway.

“It’s like license plate bingo kind of. You see the type of car first, you call it out and then you get to punch whoever you want”, you say with a shrug.

“Ooo, I like this game”, Shay says rubbing his palms together as he studies the list of “rules” you sent him: Slug bug, no punchbacks. PT Cruiser, get a bruiser. Tacoma, put you in a coma. Kia, wouldn’t wanna be ya, could be substituted with kia kick. Big truck, no luck. Subaru slap. Jeep jab. Honda hit. Train, feel the pain. You read them out loud to Ryder so that he can play too while he drives. Ryder shakes his head as you continue down the list, clearly not as impressed as Shay was.

“Where do you come up with this stuff, Y/N?”, but he agrees to participate nonetheless.

The rest of the ride is now much more exciting, everyone on high alert for a vehicle that would allow them to inflict pain on a passenger. You and Shay are admittedly better and much more active in the game since Ryder has to also pay attention to the road. As a result, he also ends up taking most of the hits, both from you and his brother. Everytime you would excitedly jab him, he’d give you puppy dog eyes. He was easy pickings, as he was right next to you, but the sad eyes did make you choose Shay as your target a little more often.

After Shay slugs Ryder in the arm for about the fifth “Kia, wouldn't wanna be ya”, his personal favorite, Ryder expresses his annoyance for the game. “This is abuse. I can’t even play right since I’m driving. The only person I can hit is Y/N, and unlike some people”, he says, shooting you a look, “I don’t enjoy hitting my significant other”.

You just roll your eyes at him, but Shay is quick to jump in, unhappy that Ryder is squashing his fun. “Awh can widdle brudder not take a few punches? You’re going soft, Ryder” Shay says with his fake baby voice.

You know it grates on Ryder’s nerves like no other so you call the game quits before they engage in an argument in the small space. Luckily, you were just pulling into the drive leading to where the Donovan’s call home. Getting out of the car Shay throws an arm around you, “I liked our game, Y/N. Very fun. We should play it more often”.

You all enter the house long enough to drop off the bags and pack some snacks for the boat. Shay leans over to you. “Want to see something funny?”, he asks with a glimmer of mischief in his eyes. You raise your eyebrow at him in response. “I’m going to get Ryder in trouble with only four words”, he promises. You use your hand to gesture him on to whatever it is he has planned.

“OW, Ryder! Ryder, stoppp!” He suddenly yells. Ryder, who was digging through the fridge, turns around, giving Shay a confused look as if to say “Wtf”.

“Ryder, seriously! Stop!”, he continues yelling.

“Knock it off!”, their mom calls down from upstairs. Ryder’s clued into what’s happening now, giving his brother a little shoulder check as he passes him to drop the strawberries on the island, just in time for his mom to come around the corner.

“Ryder stop!”, Shay yells at his brother one last time for good measure.

“Seriously, Ryder? You two are home for not even two minutes and you’re already trying to test my patience? And with a guest in the house. Did I teach you boys nothing?”, she reprimands her sons and you have to hide your smile as Shay’s plan plays out accordingly.

She’s bringing you in for a hug then and eventually her two sons the same. She catches up with the boys for a few minutes, but knows they’re impatient to get to the boat so she doesn’t chat for long.

Once she leaves the room you turn to Shay, “I have to say, I’m impressed. I didn’t think it would be that easy.” Shay has a very pleased smirk on his lips.

“I used to do it when we were kids, all the time. Good to know it still works now too, isn’t that right, Rydes?” he says nudging his brother.

Ryder looks back and forth between you and his brother, shaking his head. “You were in on this? You two are the worst. I’m about to drive back to Wisconsin and leave you both here”, he says with a huff.

Unfortunately for Ryder, your antics with Shay weren’t finished yet. While he was driving the boat, Shay had found a Tiktok that he wanted to make, but he needed your help to do it. You were lounging at the front of the boat when Shay brought it to you, explaining his plan.

“Okay, so I’m going to sit over there and just act like I’m on my phone, but I’m actually going to be filming. You’re going to put your fingers like this”, he says showing you  his thumb and pointer finger touching like in the ok sign, “and then tell him to do that on his chin, but put it on your cheek. “I want to see how many times it’s going to take him to get it right. My bet is 5. You in?”.

You felt bad goading your boyfriend like that, but you knew he was the perfect victim for it. You loved Ryder, but he was a little slow to catch onto things sometimes. The punchline of jokes? Not his thing, he’d get it a few seconds after everyone else and even then, sometimes you weren’t really sure if he even got it then. It was a wonder how he played such a fast paced game and came up with chirps on the fly. Mulling it over once more, you finally nodded your head. “Yeah, I’m in, but $10 says it’s going to take him 8”, you say with a wink.

Shaking on it, he says, “I like the way you think. You have a deal”.

Getting up you go over to your boyfriend, trying not to feel guilty. “Babe, I have a test for you”, you say as innocently as possible.

“And what is that?”, he asks, giving you his full attention.

“Put this,” Showing him the same sign Shay showed you, “on your chin”, demonstrating for him, placing the ok sign on your cheek.

He narrowed his eyes at you. “Is this a tiktok or something?” he asked, looking around for your phone. Your eyes widened with fake offence as you pointed to your phone over on your towel. “Babe, do you see me filming? My phone is way over there. It’s fine. Just put this on your chin”, you said, once again demonstrating for him.

He looked around, still suspicious. “You’re not going to hit me right? This isn’t another one of your ‘beat up on Ryder games’?” You shook your head, promising him you wouldn’t even touch him. Satisfied with that, he gave in to your request, like he always did and copied your actions. Meanwhile, Shay was trying his hardest to remain camouflage but his brother’s predictable actions were making it very difficult to not start laughing behind his phone.

You repeated your phrase again, “Put this on your chin” and he again mirrored your movements, putting his ok sign on his cheek and looking at you expectantly. You tried again, enunciating the “this” as you watched him. He again put his fingers on his face.

You tried not to laugh, repeating the phrase, trying to clue him in as you said the words slowly this time. “Put this on your chin.” He studied you real hard this time, but copied your placement exactly with his ok sign on his cheek.

You tried again, “Put this,” showing him your ok sign in front of his face and speaking slowly, “on your chin”. This time the poor boy grabbed your wrist, bringing your ok sign to HIS cheek and waiting for your approval. This time you had to let out a little chuckle and as you glanced over at Shay he was ready to bust a gut trying to hold back his laugh. You tried to compose yourself, as you tried to get your boyfriend to do the simple task.

“Put this on your chin” you practically yelled at him. Even though he was frustrated with what you were saying, he had a big smile on his face because you did. “I’m not fucking stupid” he said through laughs and grabbed your hand with two hands this time and put it on his cheek.

You were really laughing now, pulling your hand away and trying one last time. “Ryder. Put this. On your chin”, you said hoping this time would stick. But nope. The boy really put that okay sign on his damn cheek and really had the audacity to look at you to say he did it right.

You took a deep breath, trying to catch your breath from laughing so hard. “On your chin”, and he just looked at you, processing what you just said and then finally his hand shot to his chin and he started laughing again. “Oh shit”. You started cheering for him and Shay practically exploded from his spot as he fell to the floor laughing.

“Oh my god. That was too good. I’m so posting this”, he said between laughs.

“I believe you owe me 10 bucks, Shay. Pay up”, you responded with your hand out.

Ryder once again was stuck looking between you and Shay. “You set me up!” he accurately accused. “And you BET on it? You bet against me?” he said, turning to you. Seeing the hurt look on his face you felt bad.

“Rydes I didn’t bet against you per say, I just guessed how many times it might take you to catch on to what I was saying. I love you though”, you say as you run your fingers up and down his arms at an attempt to get him to forget your tricks. He’s not pleased with your answer though.

Now you’re pouting and sticking your lip out at him, throwing Shay under the bus. “It was Shay’s idea!”.

“Dude!” Shay exclaims.

You roll your eyes at him, “Oh like he didn’t already know”.

The slight frown on Ryder's face had turned into a small smile as he spoke to Shay. “I can’t believe you turned my own girlfriend on me. You guys are being extra annoying today”.

“It’s all for the tiktok, bahd” Shay answers with a shrug, unbothered by his brother’s annoyance.

You, however, spent the rest of the afternoon trying to suck up to Ryder.

“I hate you,” you said as you passed Shay to get to the cooler to fetch Ryder a drink for the fifth time as part of your penance. Shay just grins up at you, shooting you a wink. “I love you too, my little partner in crime”.

---

The following weekend you’re out with the guys, walking down State Street and a car passes your group. Shay glances at you and then Ryder and an ear splitting grin takes over his features. Lightning fast he hits Ryder, yelling “Lamborghini, hit you in your weenie!”.

You stop in your tracks as your boyfriend doubles over in pain and you double over in hysterics. The guys, as well as the few passerbyers who had heard Shay’s outburst look on in confusion.

As you finally catch your breath you move to help your still struggling boyfriend. You crouch down so you can see his face as you ask if he’s okay, but his grimace tells all. There’s nothing you can really do for him but let him breathe it out so you stand back up, high-5ing Shay. “That was pretty good,” you say shaking your head at the memory of what just happened and your road trip from last weekend.

“How long did it take ya to come up with that one?”.

He proudly announces that he’s been thinking of new ones to add to the list all week.

“Whoever introduced you two was a real idiot and is 100% regretting that decision” Ryder says from his still bent over position. You only offer your hand to help him stand straight in response.

Shay’s animatedly trying to explain the game to the boys, who all seem very excited to play. They spend the rest of the walk to KK punching each other and calling out the phrases as they search the cars lining the sides of the road. You walk a few steps behind them with Ryder leaning on you for a little support and maybe some protection.

“You’ve really created a monster now” he sighs, watching the boys.

All of a sudden he strikes your arm. “PT Cruiser, get a bruiser!”, he hollers and takes off down the street, suddenly fine. He looks back at you with a big grin.

You shake your head, “Smooth, Ryder Donovan, smooth” and you chase after him.

Mike Vorlicky

Being in a group chat with a bunch of hockey players meant that you were no stranger to your phone blowing up with nonsense, but you knew the boys were at practice, as Ryder had left for it 15 minutes ago, so when you heard more pings from your MacBook- 4 in a row to be exact -  all from Mike, you knew something was up. Quickly checking your phone, your brows knit as you read the succession of messages, confirming your suspicion that something was definitely up.

“Y/N! SOS.”

“I know you have your phone, I NEED YOU”

“Come on my ass is about to be shipped back to Edina”

“Y/N! I hate to do this, but Ryder got hurt on the way to practice. I mean like really hurt”.

The messages didn’t make sense, but the last one had you calling Mike immediately.

“Oh, thank God-'' he answered, but you cut him off, wanting to know about the status of your boyfriend.

“What happened? How is Ryder? Where are you?”. The pause on the other end of the line had your heart beating in your ears, filled with anxiety and worry for your boyfriend, at least for a moment.

When you heard “Dude she’s gonna kill you” from Cole in the background, a different emotion filled you.

“Mike Vorlicky, what the HELL is going on?”

Despite the anger and annoyance in your voice, Mike still let out a smug chuckle. “I knew that last one would get you to answer your damn phone. But listen-“

“So he’s fine? Nothing happened?”, you asked just to be sure.

When Mike lets out a nervous chuckle you release the breath that you had been holding. “I should hang up on your ass right now, Vorlicky. You can’t just-“

“No seriously, Y/N this is important. You can yell at me later, but will you pleaseeee, pretty please with a cherry on top please bring me my practice jersey? I was serious about coach shipping me out. This is like the third time. He’s gonna bench me next game and my parents are coming to this one...”.

Even though you were extremely pissed off at him for even speaking into existence your boyfriend getting hurt, you also couldn’t deny him or any of the boys when they needed your help and he knew that. After letting out a groan you asked him where the jersey was and made your way over to his dorm. Getting into his building was scarily easy and the jersey was surprisingly right where he said it would be, laid out on his bed. It’s a wonder how he forgot it.

Minutes later you were pulling up to the practice facility and walking through the glass doors that led to the rink. You were met with cool air and smiling faces. As the boys noticed you began to head your way, but not before Mike rushed over. He was coming so fast he barely had time to stop before he hit the boards and wrapped you in a hug, “I love you so much right now I could kiss you” he said, taking the jersey from your hands.

“Don’t even think about it, Vorlicky” Ryder called to him as he made his way through the boys to give you a quick kiss before the whistle blew signifying practice starting, just in time for Mike to slip the jersey over his gear.

Owen Lindmark

Cooking had never been your thing, still having never really gained that skill even after living on your own. But as much as it was not your best quality, it was even less so for the boys that were about to come crashing through your door any minute. Dating Ryder was amazing and equally as amazing were the 20 other boys who’ve you’ve come to call close friends that came along with him.

You had just gotten an air fryer and were excited to test it out. You’d been promising the boys you’d cook for them for weeks and figured what better time to do so than now. They had a big rematch coming up that weekend against PSU anyway so you had told Ryder to invite some of his teammates over for a mini team dinner.

You were pretty impressed with yourself you had to admit. Not only had you planned a full meal and dessert, you had timed it perfectly so that everything was just about finished as you heard the door unlock.

“Honey, I’m hooommee”, Shay called out as he dropped his bag in the pathway of the others behind him.

You shook your head as you stirred the marinara sauce one last time, knowing that the pet name bugged Ryder even though it was a movie line and he was so obviously joking.

“Dude it smells amazing in here”

“What’re we having?”

“I’m starving”, and curses could all be heard as the crew continued to pour into the apartment, the noise and chaos level instantly rising.

You cleared your throat and very dramatically tapped your spoon on your wine glass to gather the boys’ attention.

”First of all, everyone is to wash their hands before eating, please and thank you. Salad is already on the table. You guys can grab yourselves a plate, the pasta is over by the sink, the sauce is right next to it and then the chicken’s already been cooked in the air fryer so it follows your guys’ diets (kind of) and parmesan melted on it so you can just put that on top of the pasta. I have bread in the oven that I’ll bring out when it’s done. Oh and dessert for when everyone’s ready”. You barely finished your spiel before the boys were shoving each other to get in line.

Shay of course had battled his way to the front of the line, claiming seniority, Mike unsurprisingly behind him, followed by Lex, Owen, Cole and Dylan. For being as large as Dylan was, he had been easily bullied to the end of the line. Ryder stuck around, wrapping you in a hug and placing a sweet kiss on your forehead.

“You’re amazing for doing this. The boys haven’t shut up about it all week. You really went all out didn’t you, babe?” He asked with a proud smile on his face. His little acknowledgment coupled with how proud he looked made you blush. You knew he wasn’t lying about the boys obsessing over this meal either, as you had been receiving daily texts from each of them about it.

“Don’t get too excited, you haven’t even tasted anything yet. What if it’s the worst Chicken parm, you’ve ever tasted in your life?” You asked pouring on the dramatics. It was your first time using the air fryer after all, you had no idea how it would turn out and you were a bit nervous, but had warned the boys ahead of time that they may be ordering pizza instead.

Your disclaimer was countered by moans coming from the living room, a chorus of them actually. You and Ryder share a look before busting out laughing. “I guess there’s your answer for ya.” He replies, followed by a “No one better be having sex out there”.

You shoo him along so that he can eat with his friends and you can grab the bread out of the oven. After slicing it and putting it on a plate you deliver it to the vultures in your living room and prop yourself on the armrest of Ryder’s chair, rubbing his back as he eats.

The boys don’t stop gushing about your cooking as they continue to shovel food in their mouths. “This is seriously- the best meal- no, scratch that- food- I’ve had in months”, Cole says between bites.

“Hey, I just made you that really good burger and Mac cheese thing last week and you gave it 5 stars!” Dylan protests.

You and Owen lock eyes and instantly start laughing. “Dyl, did it come in a red box with a glove on the front?” You ask, still giggling. His eyes light up, happy that you recognize it and he nods.

“Dude, that’s Hamburger Helper!” Owen howls.

“And an insult to Y/N’s cooking”, Alex chimes in.

”Even this salad is more gourmet than Hamburger Helper, sorry bro”, Cole adds.

At this point everyone’s laughing at Dylan’s expense, yourself included. He’s immediately apologetic, hoping he didn’t truly insult your cooking, which just eggs the boys on assuring him that he did in fact insult you.

“Yeah, that’s like comparing Wayne Gretzky and Shay in hockey, but for cooking”, Mike chirps, feeling the need to get involved.

”Nice one Mikey. Dylan fucks up, but let’s roast Shay”, Shay retorts.

You grin, loving being a part of the relaxed banter that’s going on but wave them off. Dylan attempts to grumble out his weak defense, claiming that he’s from Canada and didn’t know about Hamburger Helper, just making you giggle harder.

“Okay, okay okay,” you say in an attempt to calm yourself and the room down. You were wiping tears from your eyes. “I’m going to go get the dessert so you clowns can get out of my apartment”.

Once in the kitchen you opened the cabinet by the fridge and felt around for the plate of brownies you knew you’d hidden up there so that the boys, specifically your boyfriend, wouldn’t pick at them before dinner. You felt a pair of hands on your hips. You had expected it to be your boyfriend, but with his body slightly pressed against yours you knew it wasn’t him.

“Need some help?”, the voice confirmed your thoughts. It was Owen.

“Please”, you said, accepting his offer.

He grinned once he pulled the plate down and saw the perfectly proportioned brownies. You had used one of those baking pans that had individual brownie shapes so that every piece had four edges, the best part and Ryder’s favorite.

“I love these, my mom makes ‘em like that. Smart to keep these hidden from Ryder”, he says with a wink. Though his tone is light toward the end with the little chirp at Ryder, you don’t miss the hint of sadness that laced his voice in the beginning. And he doesn’t miss the look of concern on your face either.

He puts the plate down and leans against the counter. “I love you for doing this tonight. I really can’t thank you enough. I needed this, the laughs, the home cooked meal”, he confesses, running a hand through his hair.

“Missing home a little extra?” You ask, knowing exactly how he feels.

”You could say that. I know the guys and I don’t say it enough, but we love you and appreciate how much you take care of us and keep us sane. What you do for Ryder is obvious, but stuff like this that you do extra for us, making a really good dinner and dessert, always letting us hang out here, and come to you with our problems. It means a lot”.

Not really having words for all that he’d just told you, but wanting to show him you really did care for him too, you wrapped your arms around him and gave him a good squeeze.

“Awh, O. I don’t know what to say. You and the boys are like family to me. You always have a second home here.” The sentimental moment is broken up by Mike shouting about dessert and someone telling him to shut up and stop being rude.

“I guess we better get this dessert to the boys so they can get out of your hair”, he says grinning.

Before letting him go you pull back and say, “Tell your mom I said hi when you call her later”. He picks the plate of brownies back up and you make your way toward the rowdy group occupying your living room.

“You know me too well. But I surely will let her know. I’m sure she’ll appreciate you keeping me alive”, he says with a chuckle.

Dylan Holloway

Everyone was huddled close together in the dimly lit booth as it came down to just Roman and Dylan, each with two fingers on the full pitcher in the middle of the table. The two boys were half out of their seats staring each other down. Roman had a smug smirk on his face as he watched Dylan sweat it out across from him, his mind clearly going a mile a minute.

The guys had just swept PSU and were definitely feeling themselves tonight. They decided to opt for the usual celebratory tradition of KK and Fingers, a game that Dylan was historically terrible at.

It was Dylan’s turn and he was still shaking his head, both at himself for overthinking a simple drinking game and at Roman who was continuously chirping him, which was not helping him decide. He only hoped the winning luck of the night would continue as he began counting down, “Three, two, one - two!”, Roman yanked one finger off the pitcher as Dylan left his two on, for a total of three fingers.

The team erupted as Dylan threw his hands in the air, “Fuck! I always lose this stupid, fucking game”.

“Drink up, bud!”, Roman chided him, pushing the pitcher closer to him on the table.

Dylan just groaned and stared at the full pitcher of unknown alcohol with a grimace.

“Come on, Dyl, you know the rules. Or at least you should, you’ve lost enough times by now”, Shay chirped from behind him. You felt bad for the guy because Shay wasn’t wrong. Of the handful of times you had watched and played the game, Dylan had lost all but maybe twice.

“You’re right Shay, maybe we should spice it up this time, eh? What do we think boys?” Mike suggests with a devilish smile and a rub of his palms. You don’t miss the look that he shares with Roman and your eyes narrow in on the boy who suddenly has a mischievous look in his eyes.

“Dylan, I dare you to go ask that girl for her number”, he challenges, nodding toward a blonde who had been looking over at the group.

Following his gaze you notice who exactly it is that he pointed out and you choke on your drink. You want to stop Dylan before he makes a fool out of himself, but he easily gulps down the pitcher and quickly makes his way over to the girl waiting for him. You can’t get your words out as you’re sputtering and coughing from your drink.

When you finally catch your breath you give Roman a shove and hiss “Fuck you Ro. What’re you doing? Aren’t you talking to that girl?”. He doesn’t answer, just shrugs as he watches on with a smirk plastered on his face, as if he knows exactly what is going to happen. Ryder nudges you in confusion at your little interaction with his teammate. Moving closer to him you filled him in on the unknown drama that was going on. “I played wingwoman for Roman a couple weeks ago so that he could pick up this same girl. Of course with my 90% success rate, he got her and I guess kept her. He’s been texting me about her all week”.

Suddenly understanding, he said “You have to go save D. The guys will never let him live this down” and you knew he was right. A freshman hitting on an older guy’s girl? Even if it was on a dare and even if her and Roman were just talking, it would still be embarrassing on Dylan’s part and chirp content for the team for the weeks to come.

So with a flip of your hair and a pat to Roman’s head you strode over to where Dylan was flirting with the blonde. He was really pulling out all the stops trying to earn this girl’s number, you had to give him that. You would even say that it actually appeared to be going well, but judging by the look that was on Roman’s face, you knew it wouldn’t end well.

“Excuse me, mind if I borrow him real quick? No? Ok great, thanks! I’ll give him back in just a second!”. You gripped his wrist with both hands and all but yanked him off the barstool until he was stumbling toward you, very confused. Once you were a few feet away, you steadied him with your hands. He was clearly annoyed with you.

“What the hell, Y/N? what’re you doing? I need to get back there. Things were actually going well”.

“And you will, D just listen to me for a second. I’m trying to help you here”.

“Help me? What’re you talking about?”.

“Dylan, Roman’s been talking to that girl for weeks now. He’s just trying to set you up because he knows she won’t actually give you her number because she’s with him so you end up coming back to the table empty handed and the guys can chirp you for weeks about trying to get with Roman’s girl”.

Realization washed over his face as he took in the situation. He glanced over at Roman’s now displeased but confused face and back at the girl who was seemingly waiting for him to return to the empty seat next to her.

“Whatever you have to do to get that number Dylan Holloway, do it. You can’t come back to that table empty handed, got it?”. He nodded furiously. “Good boy. Now go charm her pants off!” And with that you sent him on his way and returned to the group, all of whom were looking at you with quizzical faces.

You just shrugged it off saying, “He just wanted me to check if he smelled like beer. I guess she hates that stuff, only drinks Claws.” With that, Roman shoots you a look, knowing that was a load of shit and a jab at him. Her hatred of beer and love for white claws had been one of the many “fun facts” he had shared with you over the week. His attention turns as the guys erupt once again in cheers as the girl plants a kiss on Dylan’s cheek and sends him back to your table. He smiles victoriously as he stops in front of Roman. “I hope you don’t mind sharing your girl, she seems pretty into me”, he says and drops the napkin with her phone number on it on the table in front of Roman. The “ooos” and hollers from the boys are golden, but pale in comparison to the look on Roman’s face. Ryder fist bumps him and Dylan leans in to give your hand a squeeze, “I love you so much for that. The look on his face? Totally worth it. Really saved my ass. I owe you”.

+1

Ryder wasn’t one to overuse the phrase “I love you”. He held great value in those three words and reserved them for times when it was just the two of you or for when the moment deemed necessary. Today was one of those moments.

He had gotten home from practice early to find you out on his balcony wrapped in a blanket and your computer on your lap. He hadn’t thought much of it as he shed his bag and went to wash his hands and make a snack, but the door was cracked and he could hear a familiar laugh that wasn’t yours. He stopped what he was doing and listened for it again. As if right on cue, his baby sister’s laugh found his ears. He debated with himself whether or not he should make his presence known. Curiosity eventually winning out, he decided to wait it out and see what his two favorite girls were talking about. He’d be lying if he said his heart wasn’t ready to burst at seeing you voluntarily FaceTiming his baby sister.  

His snack forgotten, he sat himself on the couch out of view and just listened and watched. He watched the way your hair fluttered with the breeze, how you focused your attention on the girl on the screen, and nodded your head in agreement with whatever she was saying. He watched the way you interacted with his sister and couldn’t deny the feeling that was consuming him.

Even more so he watched the way Clara’s face lit up as you spoke to her, a look he’d seen before, one she reserved for her big sister. It was one of idolization, respect, and love. He watched her smile and her head tip back as she laughed with you like you were her best friend. Mostly he watched as the two of you had become part of each other’s lives in a way he hadn’t even known.

He listened to the beautiful sound of your laugh mix with hers and to the way both of your voices were so animated with each other. He listened as you spoke naturally with her, your kindness genuine instead of just treating her as some little kid. He knew she hated that but had unfortunately had her share of heartbreak by girls who only used her to get to him. He hated that he had caused her any kind of pain, but loved that you had somehow found a way to right his mistakes. He knew right then and there that he’d never take you away from her and she wouldn’t let him.

His thoughts were broken up by you reentering the apartment.

“Having a stalker moment there, Rydes?”, you ask him with eyebrows raised.

Deflecting the question, he clears his throats and instead asks what you guys were talking about. “Didn’t you hear the whole conversation already?”, you tease him. He just rolls his eyes, so you divulge as you pull stuff out to make dinner.

“We were just checking in. She was making sure you were still alive, taking your vitamins, treating me right, our usual. She had some drama stuff, but V is busy getting stuff ready for the baby so she didn’t want to bother her. Oh, and we’re planning your sister’s baby shower! Well, Clara’s in charge but she wanted my opinion on some details”.

The feeling he had before as he watched you two only intensified as he discovered what you had actually been talking about.

“What do you mean your usual?”

You’d stopped adding ingredients to the pot as you looked up at him, realizing you had just let Ryder in on something you hadn’t planned on. “Um. You know how you FaceTime Clara every week? Well uh, I do too...that’s ok right? That’s not like weird?”

He processed the information you had just told him. You actually took the time out of your busy life to get in touch with his sister every single week and were asking him if that was ok? He hadn’t even imagined you doing that, but you continued to amaze him. The smile he gave you was so warm and full of love. “Of course that’s okay. I love that you do that and I’m sure she does too. I saw the way she looks at you, you know. The same way she looks at V.” Your heart swells at his comment and you almost start crying on the spot.

“So she’s coming to you with drama huh? Anything I should know about?”. You laugh and default to “girl code” aka Ryder doesn’t get any deets. Despite his best efforts, including puppy dog eyes, he doesn’t get anything out of you.

“You’re MY girlfriend, you can’t let my sisters convert you to their side already” he whines.

You laugh and respond with “Well would you rather I convert to your brother’s side? I’m sure Shay could pitch a good argument.” He looks offended that you’d even say such a thing and grumbles out a “no”.

After he’s decided he’s done pouting he comes around the counter and wraps his arms around you from behind, nuzzling his face into your hair. “You told Clara I treat you well, right?” He questions, still thinking about your conversation with her. You’re surprised to detect nervousness in his question and that he’d even ask that. Turning in his arms you answer him, wanting him to see the conviction in your face when you say “Of course, Ryder. You don’t ever need to doubt that, baby”. He looks relieved and surprises you again with a confession.

“Good. I want Clara to see how she should be treated. What good love looks like, a healthy relationship, ya know?”.

Tears start form in your eyes and it takes you a second to find your voice. Eventually you do and you gently pull his face down to yours, running  your thumb over his cheek. You melt over the way he leans into your touch. Even though your voice is barely above a whisper, it’s strong as you tell him, “You’ve made me the happiest I’ve ever been. You show me what love is everyday and inspire me to be better for you and for me. You are such a role model to her Ryder. When she looks at us, I promise you all she will see is genuine, pure love.”

His heart is beating so hard as he absorbs your words. He takes your wrist and pulls your hand to his lips. He kisses your palm then cups your face in his hands, bringing your foreheads together. His own eyes are glassy and throat thick as he tries to put what he’s feeling into words that will convey the same amount of strength and emotion. “Every time I think ‘she can't get any better’ you surprise me. Well not surprise me because I’m not surprised you get better, but- fuck! I can’t get my words out right now.” He can feel you smiling and takes it as a sign to keep going.

“What I’m trying to say is you keep loving me and showing me that you love me in new ways that I didn't even know existed. You’re always taking care of me before games, after games and practices. Even just asking about practice and my day and coming to my games, waiting up for me after road trips. The highs of winning and you right there with me are amazing, but what I love most and what are even better are when you sit there and watch us lose, me lose and you just know how to deal with me afterwards. I can’t tell you how much it helps me to have you hold me after a game or offer dessert or just let me bitch about it. The lows are better because you still want me after. Like even if I couldn’t play hockey anymore, you’d still want me. You still believe in me to do better next game. You inspire me to be better. Off the ice especially”, he takes a deep breath then and as badly as you want to say something, you don’t interrupt him knowing he still has more to say. 

“You’ve shown me what it feels like to be loved. Really, truly loved. You take care of my friends, regardless of what they need and you do so out of the goodness of your heart. Watching you with my family, I can’t ever imagine you being anywhere else but a part of my family, Y/N. The fact that my favorite people in the entire world love you makes me so happy I can’t even describe it. You’re FaceTiming my baby sister of your own free will, planning a baby shower with her for my other sister? You keep up with Shay and get Boden out of his shell. I couldn’t dream it up better if I tried. I don’t know what I did to deserve you, but somehow I was blessed with you and I swear to you, promise you I will never stop loving you, ok? I love you with my whole heart and then some, Y/N”.  

The tears are absolutely streaming down your face and into his hands and his into yours. The moment had gotten so intense and so fast. These were rare between you two, preferring to keep the relationship light and fun, but occasional moments like this where you attempted to pour your whole heart and soul into each other would occur and you were left breathless every time. But of course, you couldn’t resist a good chirp.

“You’re gonna have a hard time topping that for a proposal, Donovan”.

[uwumessenger]

Hey, could you do RFA and V reacting to MC who turns into a dog for one day? weird I know lol

yes!! and sorry for taking oh so long fjdjndnd if u see dis i hope u enjoy eht

let's assume u do understand english as a dog and dont think in dog language. also this is super silly haha i had a lot of fun with it while trying to make it realistic!

+ btw since some ppl asked, yes my requests are open ! im just going in order so feel free to continue sending them in !! i only have 5 requests in my inbox now as of 5/11/2020 so ill get around to yours soon :)

Yoosung

when he wakes up and cant find you he immediately panics

calls your name and lifts anything that can be lifted to find you

he even checks the fridge!! wink wonk

when he finally quiets down and hears your barking he goes into panic mode AGAIN

when he finally finds you (as a dog) his mind begins racing

wait...is it our anniversary?!?!!! what exact day did MC join RFA again? um um is it my birthday? is it MC's BIRTHDAY???

ignores you and does a group call with zen and seven, trying to figure out what is happening

seven verifies that it is not a day of any importance

poor yoosung is just SO CONFUSED

but how do u even tell someone u transformed into a dog

i dont think yoosung would ever find out you turned into a dog

everyone would help with searching for you, and of course panic again bc the way you met them was lit rally bc u walked into your own kidnapping

yoosung is the physical embodiment of panic

but he takes care of you normally (LUCKILY HE DOESNT TURN YOU INTO THE POUND OR SOMETHING–)

when u turn human after 24 hours you explain EVERYTHING

and now he feels better

Zen

a few nights ago, zen had a psychic dream that you turned into a dog so

he brushed it off as a nightmare and his symptoms appeared bc the AC was broken and it was extra hot that night

but when he woke up and opened his eyes to a whole ass dog next to him

he FREAKED OUT

at first he didnt know what was going on but then he remembered his dream

so he tells you to bark once for yes and twice for no

are you MC?

bark!!!

are you hungry?

bark!!!

this goes on for 25 more minutes until you stop cooperating and trot away

hes very glad that at least youre not a cat

he feeds you and allows you to go do your potty business outside by yourself then cleans up after ur finished

he doesnt want you to be alone with nothing to do while hes at rehearsals so he asks yoosung to watch you!

but doesnt tell yoosung it's you lol

when he comes back he just chills w/ u until ur back to your ol' human self :')

Jaehee

initially she'd be pretty calm, thinking that you had to leave early to go do something

but after checking her phone every 2 seconds and searching every nook and cranny yet not recieving a text/finding a note from you, she begins to panic

she calls all the others, wondering if they knew where you were or what you were up to

no one knew what was going on so everyone panics!!!!

tbh she forgot about dog MC until u start scratching her

eventually jaehee starts considering the idea of u turning into a dog....but....what are the odds...

after trying everything you could think of to tell her it's really you, you realize that she wont catch on

after shes done getting ready for work she starts to wonder how to care for you

eventually decides on just bringing you in to work and hiding you the whole day

luckily jumin had back to back meetings so he wouldnt have any time to check in on what jaehee was doing

she tries to feed you something you absolutely hate and when you refuse to eat it she says

wow, MC hates eating these too

you wag your tail, jump, can dogs nod? if so you nod your head, etc etc trying to tell her that IT IS ME IT IS MC!!!'sisj@;!/&:&82

wait...there's no way. am i crazy or did you turn into a dog?

jaehee decides to bring you home instead of turning you into a shelter just in case

when you turn human again you guys strategize a plan, should this ever happen to either of you again haha

Jumin

when he wakes up and sees you (as a dog) and elizabeth playing he thinks hes still sleeping

intense eye rubbing

he calls for you and you keep running to him

but he doesnt understand :c

similar to yoosung, he double checks to see if it was a significant date or anything

now he starts to panic

on the RFA panic scale, he is at the tippity top eue

calls off from work and calls for all the help he can get

you can communicate with elizabeth i guESS so she helps you communicate with jumin

jumin looks crazy as hell rn with a cat and dog on his bed, trying to talk to them

elizabeth points at you then points at your jacket on a chair 900 times and then jumin finally connects the dots!!!

oH SO MC TURNED INTO A DOG???

you and elizabeth are like ugh oh my gosh finally

jumin calls off all the emergency protocol stuff and simply chills with you and elizabeth until youre back to your human body

now you and elizabeth have a stronger bond...how beautiful.

707/Saeyoung

luckily seven has security cameras, so when he sees you in dog form, youre sitting at his computer

the cctv footage of you somehow transforming into a dog plays and hes like oh what how is that eVEN POSSIBLE?

downloads the cctv footage to save it forever

unfortunately no dog food or anything there so he feeds you whatever is in the fridge and okay for dogs to eat

he has his fun, taking photos of you and imitating paris hilton

when vanderwood walks in to check on him, seven cant stop laughing as he explains the situation

he shares all of his photos with the rfa chat and no one believes him

and then he stops and starts thinking

??? MC are you naked? like when we sleep and you transform back....are you gonna be naked?

oh my gOSH

unlike the others he doesnt stay up and goes to sleep with you

whatever u do, do not let seven make a birthday slideshow of u </3

V

V would freak out, but definitely try to communicate with you as a dog before doing the absolute most

checks for human you everywhere, and when he realizes youre nowhere, he begins to consider the fact that you may have turned into a dog

googles it

he questions you, like zen does, and begins to think hes going insane

he texts you, just in case human you did go out and forgot to tell him

but while texting he scrolled up and saw a text you sent him a day ago while you were shopping

"if i were a worm would you still love me"

he picks you up and sits with you on the couch

worm, dog, human...i love you regardless. but not in an immoral and weird way. :)

spends the rest of the day taking you out to do dog things

like walking at the park and taking cute photos of you

at the end of the day he actually showers you, and talks to you until you both fall asleep

when u guys wake up he says,

i didnt waste $17 on dog shampoo for nothing...why dont we go out and get a real dog now?

yES LETS DO THAT

[d-l-dare]

“Accidental Fame”

Perfection is something we often struggle with in our daily lives, whether you realize it or not. It lies in the things we do and the things we say. To some, they need not try because they know what they put out in the world is perfect enough for them. For others, the harsh reality is that perfection isn't something you can toss around lightly. It is instead something that needs to be carefully crafted for hours on end until there is no small detail overlooked.

I sat on my bed, scrolling through the short, minute long videos on my phone. I found myself mindlessly entertained for a good thirty minutes, passing by and feeling like a few seconds had passed. Why was it so easy to be so involved in such short videos by these random people all over the world?

There was one video where this girl was talking to her dog as though it was a person, telling it that its rent is past due and they needed to pay it. The dog tilted its head in confusion and I couldn't stop saying "Awe" in admiration of how cute it was. It made me wish I had a dog.

I scrolled again to be greeted with a video of someone talking about something political. I just rolled my eyes to it. Why does everything have to be political? Why can't we all just try getting along instead of beating up on each other because of an opinion?

The same kind of scrolling continued on for hours without me even realizing how much time had passed. Why were these so addicting? I needed to go to work soon. I threw the covers off myself and stood from the bed. I made my way to the bathroom to start a shower before throwing on some work clothes and heading out the door.

*** My co-workers greeted me as I walked through the door to my job at Happy Harold's. I hated working in the back and flipping burgers for several hours a day. I wanted to be out there interacting with some customers, making some laugh and potentially meeting my significant other. I had one person in mind I'd like to impress out there, a regular, but being stuck in the back here I never get a chance to interact with them. I'll sneak a peek at them every once in a while when I head out to clean the bathroom or take the trash out, but otherwise I never see them.

It was a pretty slow day at work, which was understandable, as there was ice covering the roads outside. I was lucky to have made it here. I didn't live very far, I could have walked if I wanted to but it was too cold out there.

Because it was so slow, a few friends of mine started talking about some videos floating around online, the short sixty second ones. They mentioned how easy it would be to go viral on there, by being funny or showing some cleavage. I wasn't a big fan of showing off my body, so I opted out of that. That was when one of my friends brought up the fact that the person I like has been seen on there a few times with a decent following. I had to see if for myself. They opened their phones and showed me some dancing videos they'd made. I knew I needed a piece of that. And I had just the idea on how to do it.

*** Shortly after arriving back home, I pulled my phone out and began recording. I tried making sure I looked good before I pressed the button, of course. I propped my phone against my couch and began dancing to one of my favorite songs I had playing in the background. After the video was recorded, I took a look back at it and realized how bad it was.

I practiced dancing before jumping back and recording again. I played the video back and I got a phone call from one of my best friends from work, causing the screen to switch. I answered and she and I began talking about some stuff that went down over at her place earlier that day. Something about her boyfriend yelling at her for something she didn't mean to do.

After our conversation was over, I switched back to the app and realized it was on a different screen. Did it get uploaded? I couldn't believe it, it was sitting up on my page. I watched it and it was even worse than the first time around. I was about to delete it when I noticed how many views and likes it had received. Both were somewhere close to the one thousand mark. I checked the comments and it looked to be flooded with nothing but nice compliments. Some of the things they said were a little vulgar, but I paid no mind to it.

I continued scrolling down. The last comment on the page nearly made my heart stop. "Who's that guy standing behind you?"

[mysticalenergy]

24 HOURS WITH MR H

24 hours with Tom Hiddleston Written by Sharon Lane and posted in the facebook group The Amazing Tom Hiddleston This isn’t your typical fanfic so please don’t expect it to be.  The idea of the story came to me one night when I was posting my last pic of the day in the group and it happened to be one of Tom laying down.  One of the lovely ladies, Barbara, said goodnight and wished Tom and I a good night.  The idea grew from there so, thank you Barbara, without you I wouldn’t have written this. The story is a glimpse of a fictional day where I put myself in a relationship with the lovely Mr.H and runs from midnight to midnight. Don’t take it too seriously, it’s just meant to be a bit of fun.

I picked the photos then wrote the story around them.

PLEASE NOTE:  I do not own any of the pictures used in this story.

He's just called out to me and told me to haul my butt into bed so I'll bid you all goodnight and we'll see you in the morning.

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Good morning everyone. It's very cold here this morning so we've decided to stay in bed and snuggle for a while.

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‘Much as I would love to stay and snuggle, the day awaits...and I need coffee. ‘Come on you gorgeous man, time to get up and go about our day.’ I told him as I rolled out of bed. ‘Mmmmm, no.  Just let me stay here,’ he pleaded. ‘Nope, sorry babe.’  I said as I leaned over and kissed him, ‘Come on, let’s go.  I’ll put coffee on, see you in the kitchen.’

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'Darling put some music on,' he called out from the bedroom.  Walking over to my phone, I scrolled through the music and found what I was looking for.  He came into the kitchen, walked over to my phone and held it out to me. ‘This is your idea of breakfast music?’ he asked. Smiling, I nodded, ‘Sure is.  Helps get me moving.’ I said as I started headbanging around the kitchen.

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It's quite cool this morning (2°C or about 35°f) so he suggested a run to warm us up...fine for him but I've got a torn meniscus so it hurts. ‘Come on darling,’ he called out with a sly grin, ‘Keep up.’ ‘Yeah right, very funny.’  I sulked, ‘You know how much I miss running with you.’ ‘I’m sorry,’ he said, ‘once you get your knee fixed you can join me again.  Should I just walk with you?’ ‘No, you run, I know you love it.  I’ll just walk for a bit.’

------

'Oh come on love, join me for a quick shower', he pleaded. 'Much as I would love to, I have a feeling it won't be very quick if I join you.' I answered. He smiled that lovely smile of his then I got this look as I went to back out of the room. 'Oh I don't think so' he said, 'I want you here. Now.' At the risk of breaking the internet I'll put the phone down now just in case I accidentally take a pic of what's below. See you soon....maybe.

------

As predicted by me, it wasn't a quick shower however, we're finally ready to start getting some errands done. He's just realised how cold it is out so is now telling me I need to get a coat and to hurry up as it's getting late.  I've just reminded him it's his fault because of the shower. ‘Come on darling, get a wriggle on, it’s getting late,’ he said. ‘Well, if you had just let me get dressed instead of insisting I have a shower with you, we would have been ready and on our way but no, you had to have me in the shower.’ I answered. ‘...and on the sink, and in the bedroom.’ he smirked as I smacked his wandering hands. ‘Stop it,’ I giggled, ‘we’ll be late.’ Anyway, we're off. See you soon.

------

Yelling at me because I'm taking pics instead of sitting having brunch with him. He's so sweet. ‘Can you get yourself over here and join me?  Why this incessant need to take photos of me darling?  You’re a funny one.’  He said as he beckoned me over.  ‘Show me.’ I showed him the photo and he chuckled, ‘oh that’s just delightful.’ ‘Well you shouldn’t yell at me when I’m trying to take photos,’ I said as I elbowed him in the ribs. ‘Point taken.  Now, what do you want to eat?’

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Babe, where'd you go?' I called out. He answered, 'I'm out the back love, just charging my phone. Did you need something?' 'Only you my love, always just you.' I said. 'Well you have me darling, always and forever.' He smiled

------

He wanted to know why I kept stopping to post things on Facebook so I told him... 'I'm giving everyone in my favourite group a run down of our day.' He looked a little quizzical, 'Why would you do that? I'm sure no one really cares what we do.' I laughed at him and assured him people are interested in him. 'So when did you start your little jottings darling?' 'Late last night when we went to bed.' I answered, 'and I've been posting what we've been doing.' 'All of it?' he asked. I nodded, 'yep, all of it.' 'Even the shower?' he questioned. 'Of course' I answered, 'I told you, all of it.' 'Oh God' he said covering his eyes and putting his head down.

I'll let him sweat for a bit then let him know I didn't give details

------

I took pity on him and told him I didn't spill details about the shower then I disappeared into another room. I heard him get the guitar out. He loses himself in the music when he plays, then I had a wicked thought. I've seen women doing the naked challenge with their significant other and some of the reactions have been hilarious. I thought to myself, 'why not give it a go?' So, I stripped off and went padding out to the living room stark naked....

------

So, it got a little steamy after my last post. If this were my fanfic I'd kiss and tell but as it's a group post I'll just leave this pic and leave it up to your imagination for the rest...

------

We managed to make it out the door again....just, which was a good thing as Tom was lucky enough to be invited to read from Shakespeare’s first folio, a 400 year old book,  I don’t think the smile left his face the whole time he had it.   We came back home and he continued reading from my Shakespeare book which is only a baby at 94 years old.

------

'Hey Tom?' 'Yes darling, what is it?' he asked. 'What was it like touching a book that's 400 years old?' I queried as I touched the hands that held the book. 'It felt wonderful, like I could almost hear the voices of those who held it before me.' he enthused, 'an unforgettable experience.' I looked at his boyish face so full of enthusiasm and couldn't help myself. I turned to him and uttered the words, 'Shakespeare sucks' then ran as fast as I could when I saw this look on his face. It took me a full 5 minutes to calm him down and reassure him that Shakespeare doesn't suck and, is indeed, the greatest playwright ever...or maybe Marlowe. He's still sulking a bit

------

He's still a little upset with me over my Shakespeare comment. 'But I was only joking.' I assured him. 'You shouldn't joke about that darling. You know how I feel about Shakespeare.' he sulked. I apologised as I hugged him, 'I'm sorry, you know I love his plays and you know I adore listening to you read his poetry to me. Forgive me?' He sighed deeply, 'darling of course I forgive you. I can't stay mad at you but please, don't say it again.' I assured him I wouldn't. 'I won't babe, I promise. Now, how about I buy you a coffee?'

------

“Tom, should we take the dogs for quick walk?  We’re heading out to dinner tonight remember so a walk might tire them out a bit.’ ‘Bobby just heard you say the ‘W’ word darling, we have no choice now.  Look how excited he is.’ “You’re such a softy when it comes to Bobby, just look at your face when you watch him.’ I told him. “Yes I know love but you’re exactly the same with your boy Paddy,’ he chuckled. Grabbing the leashes and, Tom with Bobby and me with Paddy, headed out for a quick walk. Back soon...

------

'Babe, have you seen my....' I stopped dead in my tracks...'laptop'. There he was, sitting at the table with my laptop, totally focused on what he was reading. Suddenly feeling very nervous I asked, 'um, what are reading babe?' He didn't answer. Thinking to myself, 'please, please, please, don't let him be reading my fanfic,' I approached the table and touched his shoulder. 'Babe?' I softly said as I looked at the screen. 'Oh no' I thought to myself. There, on the screen, was one of my fanfics about Loki. And, it was the darkest, most erotic one I'd written. He looked up, expressionless, 'Did you write this?' he asked. Nodding, swallowing nervously, I said, 'Yes. I'm sorry.' 'Why are you sorry?' he asked me. 'Because it paints Loki in a dark light and I know that upsets you.' I replied. He was silent then as his eyes raced across the screen finishing the story. 'Don't apologise darling. If you enjoy it, you should keep doing it. Have you written more?' Again, I nodded then showed him the files. He read them, then gave me a kiss and told me I should keep writing because he wants to read more.

------

'Darling, it's time to get ready.' he called out. 'Ok, won't be a minute.' I answered. I finished feeding Bobby and Paddy then put food out for the cats, Ruby and Jagger, and rinsed a couple of glasses on the sink. Looking at the time I headed into the bedroom to gather my clothes and get ready for a shower. As I entered the room this is the view that met me. Would you understand if I said I suddenly didn't want to go out?

------

'Busted Mr H. Get your fingers out of your mouth and stop stealing the food.' I laughed.

'But darling, I'm starving. Do you think they could hurry it up a bit?' he moaned.

'You'll be fine my love, you won't starve I promise.' I assured him.

He pulled me close, 'but I am starving darling, I'm starving for you. Let's just skip out, go home and order pizza. I want you all to myself.'

'Sounds like a plan. Let's go.'

Giggling like a couple of school kids, we made our escape and are currently headed back home.

------

He was very reserved on the way home and behaved like a perfect gentleman, so I got a huge shock when we'd no sooner got through the door, and he grabbed me, pinning me against the wall. To be continued....

------

He's gone for a shower while we wait for the pizza and I picked his phone up looking for a pic he'd taken earlier when we took the dogs for a walk and found this. Master of the selfie and donut lover.... I wonder if we've been missed at the dinner yet?

------

What are you thinking about my love?' I asked him, 'you're looking very pensive.' 'You have the most beautiful eyes darling,' he replied. 'They're breathtaking.' 'You're making me blush,' I responded as I leaned forward and rested my head under his chin. Wrapping his arms around me and pulling me close he whispered, 'I wish we could stay like this forever.' 'Mmmm, it would be lovely but all too soon you'll be called away again.' I murmured. 'Shhhh love, let's not think about it. I want to be selfish and think only of us for a while.'

------

Are you not so hangry now?' I asked him. 'Feeling better with a full stomach?' 'Definitely feeling better now.' he smiled looking up as I walked back into the room with a cup of tea and his beloved chocolate hobnobs. 'Babe, would you read to me. Please?' I asked as I snuggled up beside him on the couch. 'Of course darling. What should I read?' 'Anything really. You pick.' https://youtu.be/FRtG0h7gxsI

------

'Darling? Um, hello. Darling, can you hear me?' he called. I jumped when he touched my arm, 'sorry babe, what did you say?' 'What has you so engrossed?' he asked then laughed as he tapped my arm again trying to get my attention. 'Shhhh,' I scolded then giggled, 'I'm watching you go to war.' 'Darling, how many times have you watched this?' he asked. I shrugged, 'lost count now shhh.' He leaned over and kissed me then settled down to read as I focused my attention back on Henry V.

------

I paused The Hollow Crown to make a coffee and turned to see Tom on his knees, hands together in front of him.. Feeling slightly puzzled I looked at him and quietly asked, 'What are you praying for?' He smirked a little and quietly kept mumbling so I went to turn away. 'I'm praying that you'll see reason and come with me when I have to go back to work. I don't want to be separated from you.' I sighed, 'we've been over this.' He stood and walked over to me, ' I know we have. Let's not get into it tonight ok. I just want you with me.' I smiled and reached up, cupping his cheek with my hand, 'I know,' and kissing him lightly on the cheek said, 'I'm making coffee then watching the rest of Henry V. Do you want coffee?' 'No thanks love. I'll come sit with you soon though.'

------

Walking in he found me on the couch sobbing while the end credits for The Hollow Crown rolled on the TV. With a slightly bemused look on his face he came over to me and gathered me in his arms. 'Darling, why are you crying?' he asked gently as he wiped the tears from my eyes, 'you know what's coming yet everytime you watch it, this happens.' 'But you died,' I sobbed. Giving a quiet chuckle he shushed me, 'I'm here love, it's OK. I'll never understand why you put yourself through this.' he said as he held me. 'Because it's wonderful,' I sniffed through my tears.

------

I finished sobbing much to his relief. He said I'm not allowed to watch The Hollow Crown for a while because he hates seeing me upset but thinks it's funny too. That only serves to make me a bit snarly then he gets that sassy look, then I get sassy and well...i won't be watching for a while. He gave me this look and I bounced off the couch to the DVD collection. 'What are you doing?' he asked. 'Well clearly you can see what I'm doing. I'm getting a movie to watch.' 'What movie?' he questioned, 'no more movies that make you cry. I forbid it.' 'Oh you do, do you?' I replied, arms folded. 'Yes!' he growled. I laughed, 'Tom, your Loki's showing.' And I pulled out The Avengers at which point we both burst out laughing.

------

'Don't give me that look,' I said. 'It's your turn.' 'I swear I did it last time,' he replied. 'Nope, I did.' I assured him, 'your turn, off you go.' 'But, it's too cold,' he grumbled. 'Oh for goodness sake, stop being a princess,' I told him. 'It only takes 2 minutes.' Sighing deeply and wiggling his way forward on the couch, he slowly stood and stretched. 'Bobby, Paddy' he called, ‘come on, toilet time.’ And with that he disappeared with the 2 dogs running behind.  2 minutes later he was back and put his hands under my shirt. I squealed at how cold they were. 'Payback's a bitch,' he smirked.

------

'Please babe, just one more pic? I promise it's the last one for the night.' 'No darling. It's time to put the camera away and settle down for the night.' he told me. 'But I said I wanted to do a day in our lives. That's 24 hours, not 23.5.' I complained. 'You don't have to do anything, just sit there and let me take your pic.' 'And you promise this is the last one?' he asked. 'I promise it's the last one you have to sit for,' I said. 'But that's not what I agreed to,' he stated. 'Is this the last one?' I grinned, 'technically no because I want to get to 24 hrs but I promise it's the last one you need to sit for ok?' He considered it for a moment and, as I was about to take the pic, he closed his eyes and put his hands up. 'Still using it,' I laughed as he grabbed me.

------

'Come on love, time for bed.' he called out. 'I won't be a minute, just finishing up here.' I told him. 'No more pics now my love. It's time to put all that away and give yourself to me. 100% of yourself to me and in turn I give you 100% of me.' 'I'm just posting the last one babe. The 24 hours is up.' 'Tell them all I said goodnight.' he said 'I will. Now, open your book and get ready to read to me.' Heading into the bedroom I pushed the 'post' button, put my phone down on the bedside table, climbed into bed and lay with my head on his chest as he started to read to me.

And on that note, I bid you all a goodnight from my love and me.

The End.

[crushedbyhyperbole]

Beyond Broken - Chapter Two

Have you read chapter one?

Warnings:  There’s mild homophobia from a secondary character, and implied repercussions by that same character.  Really he’s just old and set in his ways.

For more chapters see my Thor Odinson Mobile Masterlist

The Lonely Man

On Saturday Jess ran the emergency dental clinic until two o’clock when Sadie came in to replace her. She made it to David’s a little after three, taking a detour along the costal road by Ocean Beach Park.  The previous night had really stuck in her head, like the spark of connection with another equally tortured soul.  It was absurd and she knew it, but she found herself driving passes around the block anyway, searching.  It was a futile venture.

William Sr. was full of smiles when he answered the door.

“There she is!”  He beamed brightly.  “My favourite girl.”  His hug was firm and sincere.

“Ahh, Bill,” Jess chuckled, “not so loud or Daisy will get jealous.”

He winked at her with a cheeky grin and waved a hand at her as if to say ‘nonsense’.

“How’re you keeping? I hear you’re still looking after my David.  He really loves your company, you know.  You keep him sane, and me, if truth be told.  He’d be in the house every night moping around getting under my feet if he didn’t meet you almost every evening.  And you know I appreciate you helping out with the dog an all.”  Bill didn’t wait for a reply but pottered eagerly into the kitchen.  “Coffee, tea?”

“Coffee, please.”  She’d need it after the horrific night sleep she got the night before.  “I’m doing ok, thanks for asking.  David an I really keep each other sane.  He keeps me occupied so I don’t think about things too much.”

Bill’s eyes darkened as if a shadow had passes over his face momentarily.  Jess knew it was still hard for him.  It was hard for them all.

“He tells me you’re still enjoying your Sunday night meet.”

Bill only smiled by way of a reply.

“Sugar?  Or are you still sweet enough?”

“Sweet enough.”  She winked.

Daisy came running in at that moment and jumped up at her legs, laddering her tights and smearing mud up her shins.  Luckily the knee-length pencil skirt she wore was spared the muddy make-over.

“Oh you stupid dog, leave the girl alone!”  Bill bent, strained to pick her up.  “Davey boy, come get this dog back in the utility room, she’s getting mud all over the place.”

“No harm done.  I can live without the tights.”

“Hi!” David enthused, breathless, wearing a toothy gurn and wide eyes in place of a smile.  He grabbed Daisy and took her back to get her cleaned. “We’ve just been down to the old stream.”  He called from the other room.  “All the rain has turned it into a river and a lot of the land has flooded.”

“Surprised they haven’t concreted that over to make a car park yet.”  Bill scoffed, handing her a steaming cup.

“Thanks.”  She sipped and sat with William Sr. as he resumed his afternoon TV session.

Watching the news was unbearable.  People were still talking about Disintegration Day.  This new D-Day had surpassed the world war II D-Day by quite a significant factor.  Each city in America, and around the world probably, was erecting monuments, naming all those lost in what they were now calling The Infinity War.  She didn’t pretend to know what that meant but it didn’t change the harsh reality of the outcome.  We had lost but not without trying, apparently.  The scale of this attack was far greater than that on New York and The Avengers had been powerless to stop it.

Jess knew very little about who and what The Avengers were, besides work talk and her talks with David. There had been public out-cry, people slating the group for their failure, calling for them to be brought to justice for bringing this war here to earth.  What had become clear in the following weeks was that this Infinity War had been universal.  Half of all life in the whole universe had been wiped out. How can a small group of people such as they fight a war that large on so many fronts?  It was impossible.

Just leave them alone.  Jess thought each time she heard the criticism.  They’re people too.  They’ve lost loved ones just the same as us.

“You ready to go?” David smiled down at her.  How long had he been there?

“Yeah, sorry.”  She shook herself free of the stupor that had gripped her, taking a long swig of her cooled coffee.  “You sure you’re not up for a late lunch, Bill?”

David shot her a daggered look.

“Nuh-uh.”  He grunted without taking his eyes off the TV.  “I’m not one for these trendy wine bars and fancy restaurants.  You go enjoy yourselves.”

She chuckled, if only he knew how few trendy wine bars and fancy restaurants there were left.

“Why did you insist on inviting him?”  David pouted from the passenger seat.  His feminine side was really showing through more and more lately.  Silas was the likely catalyst for this development.

“He’s got feelings.  And inviting him at least shows we care. Besides, he never accepts.”

She pulled away down the cluttered street.

All but the big towns and cities were becoming more and more run down as time went on.  There were fewer sanitation workers now, hell, there were fewer of every kind of worker, but the same number of streets.  The Stark Foundation’s Disaster Relief Initiative had been put into place two  months ago, where the homeless and unemployed were all suddenly employed and homed thanks to vacancies and empty homes created by D-Day.  It was taking a while, but humanity was gradually getting itself back on its feet.  Things would never be the same but that didn’t mean it had to be all bad.

Jess’s dinner plans with David were mostly a ruse, just as the dog walking was, and virtually everything else in David’s life.  They grabbed something quick in an uptown bar before David shot off to meet his lover.

“I don’t know why you don’t tell Bill that you’re gay.”  She’d said to him once, a few months back.

“Because he’ll disown me and it’ll probably kill him.”  He’d replied, swiping through grinder on his phone.

“Has he said as much?”

“Yeah.”  David had stopped scrolling and turned his phone to her to reveal a sultry looking man with dark chest hair and a shaved head. “What do you think?”

“Too cliché.”  She’d sipped her cocktail and rolled her eyes. “What were his exact words?”

“To quote…”  David had dropped his phone into his pocket and stared at her with an irritated glare.  “’When are you going to get a girlfriend, huh?  Double-you-Jay started dating Jess before he was your age.  I swear, boy, you better not turn out to be one of them fairies or I’ll skin you alive and disown you.’  He also added ‘you’ll send me and your mother to an early grave, damned boy.’”

Jess had accepted that, yes, maybe William Sr. was a bit of a homophobe.  It had been a long time since she’d heard the old man refer to his eldest son as double-you-jay (W.J. for William Junior).  Bill got over that phase when she and Will got engaged. Maybe he didn’t think of him as a man until he was on his way towards marriage.

So that put Jess squarely in the realms of helping David lie to his father and covering up for him while he went and got laid.  It did make her wonder what kind of relationship it was, and would it last if the people in it could only see each other a few hours a day in clandestine meetings of sordid debauchery?  And they were debauched, David had told her as much.

Whatever works for them.  He’s happy.  Let it go.

At 7pm she found herself back on the boardwalk at Ocean Beach Park instead of back at the practice catching up on paperwork.  Heels and a skirt that limited your leg movements were not things one should wear for negotiating uneven terrain; she stumbled a few times on her way down to the waterfront.  The clouds weren’t all that dense yet, some of them looked more white than grey, which was a change.

She leaned against the railing by marker twelve, it really was a beautiful spot. The regal trees and grassy expanse of the park at her back, dissected by well worn footpaths and clusters of flowering shrubs, clean pale sands stretching along in front of the silvery-wood deck of the boardwalk, and beyond, the deep Prussian blue expanse of the Atlantic mantled by tempestuous skies, all perfectly framed by minimum human clutter.

“No dog today?”  A deep voice scared her into an undignified squeak.

Clutching her chest, gasping, she whipped around to face the man.  

“I apologise, if I scared you.”  The lonely man held his hands up in mock surrender.

“No, it’s ok.  Well, I mean, you did, but it’s ok.”  She panted a little, leaning forward to catch her breath again.

There was more light than when she’d previously seen him.  His hood was down revealing dark-blonde hair that was short at the sides and longer on top, a neatly trimmed beard and the most perfect teeth she’d seen in quite a while.  His smile faded quickly as he searched her face with concern, one crystal clear, almost iridescent, blue eye and one hazel eye scanning her reaction.

Heterochromia.  That was rare.

“Once again, I apologise.” He lowered his gaze and began to turn away.  “I shall leave you be.”

“No!”  She lurched forward with her hand outstretched to stop him. “This is kind of your spot anyway, I’m just squatting here.”  She rolled her hand in a beckoning motion.  “Please.  Stay.”

“Very kind of you.”

His accent was strange, English maybe but she wasn’t quite sure.  He leaned on the railing at just over arm’s length from her, respecting the unspoken boundaries that strangers should about personal space.

They stood a while, looking out across the water.  It was comfortable, she didn’t feel awkward until she suddenly remembered his question.

“No dog.”  She said, nodding embarrassingly, giggling a little at how stupid she sounded.

The lonely man dipped his head forward, a smile playing on his lips.

“She’s an energetic one. I trust your gentleman friend is doing his duty this evening otherwise you will have a rampant puppy to contend with tonight.”  He rumbled a short chortle at his internal imagery.

“He has.”   David was family, not a ‘gentleman friend’.

She continued to look out across the water, feeling the chill of the metal railings bite into her forearms through her white chiffon blouse.  It had been a mild day up until now, but with the light fading and the wind beginning to pick up she wished she’d brought her jacket from the car. Her sweater vest only did so much and, honestly, she hadn’t intended to stay so long.

“It doesn’t look as though it’ll storm so hard tonight, the air feels a bit lighter.”  She glanced to her right to see him nodding.  “Will you miss the rain?”

He looked at her then, with a pained look, mouth and brows set into a solemn expression.

“There are other things than rain to cleanse the spirit.”  His tone was almost sagely.  He offered her a thin-lipped smile.

“I suppose you’re right.” Jess had almost forgotten the cold by then.  Her mind was quiet.

They stood in the failing light until ten o’clock rolled around.  The lonely man was the first to break their mutual silence.

“I suppose I should let you go.”  He rumbled quietly.  “Shouldn’t keep you here any longer with my captivating presence.”  He flashed her a brilliant smile and she couldn’t tell if he was being sarcastic or not.

“I’m not exactly handcuffed to the railings here.”  She laughed. A light feeling she thought she’d lost bubbled up delicately in her chest.  For the first time in ten months she felt like she might be able to find herself again, if only she could let herself feel something other than agonising loss.  “But I should go.  I’m the designated driver.”  She raised her eyebrows and sighed.

“I hope your gentleman friend doesn’t keep you waiting again this evening.”  The lonely man called after her.

“Me too.  It was nice to meet you.”  She waved from the start of the trail that would take her to her car.

“Likewise.”

[lovemesomesurveys]

Do you feel comfortable wearing tube tops? Noooo. You’ll never see me in a tube top. I don’t even wear tank tops. Has something someone said today annoyed you? Not so far, ha. I haven’t interacted with anyone, yet. It’s only 4:33AM.  Can you hear the crickets chirping at night? No. Do you like listening to new music, or just sticking to your favorites? I like new music, but I do love listening to my good ol’ favorites. I have a playlist that consists of a variety of music, new and old, from various genres and decades, that I just click shuffle and listen.  So far, where have you been on vacation? I haven’t gone anywhere this year, yet. 

Did you ever feel that there was something you couldn't tell anyone? Yep. Old stuff and ongoing, current stuff. Do you tend to gossip, even if you don't mean it to cause harm? It does happen. I’ll see something on social media about someone I know and tell my mom or brother. Family gossip stuff. Not to talk shit, but it’ll be like, “omg did you see what so and so posted/did/whatever.” Or like if someone is pregnant or broke up or whatever.  My main gossip is celebrity stuff, though. ha. When was the last time you were bitten by a bug? I don’t recall. It’s been a long time, thankfully. Have you ever gotten your hair permed? No. Do you have a pair of sunglasses that are worth over $200? I don’t have any sunglasses. I don’t wear ‘em, but if I did I sure wouldn’t spend that much. Not anywhere close. Would you ever go on a trip to Europe? Absolutely. I’d love to. There’s so many places I’d love to visit. Are you brave when it comes to trying new foods? Nopeee. I have the same few foods I rotate between. It’s a small list. When was the last time you saw your significant other? I’m single. Is there a friend that you can always go to for advice? I can go to my mom. Have you ever been to a town/place where the people were just creepy? No. Ew, I hope I never go somewhere like that. What's the fastest you've ever driven in a car? I’ve never driven a car. If you see a piano, are you tempted to go over and play a little something? I would. Especially because it’s been over 10 years since I last played.  Is there someone you know who bakes amazing sweets? Yeah. Are you ashamed of your singing voice? I can’t sing for shit, but it doesn’t stop me from singing to myself or around my family. I try to sound as decent as I can, ha. I’m not like those people on American Idol they show that can’t sing well at all, but they think they can and they’re just on there wailing. lol. Has anyone teased you with the "K-I-S-S-I-N-G" song? Yeah. Have you ever had a dream where you could understand a foreign language? No. That would be weird. What time is it where you are? 4:45AM. Do you have anything important to do tomorrow? I have my Bible study stuff. Have you ever owned a beanbag chair? Yeah, when I was a kid we had one. If you own a laptop, do you have a case for it? I do. What was the last movie you purchased on DVD? I don’t even remember. I haven’t bought a physical DVD in yearssss.  Are you a fan of retro things? Yeah. Do you do your own laundry? No. I need help with that, which my mom does. Have you ever used pastels? Yes. Is there a song you're listening to at the moment? No. Would you be considered to be knowledgeable about World War 2? Not really. Have you ever been in possession of a hundred dollar bill? Yes. Is there one food you cannot give up, even though you know it's unhealthy? I don’t eat healthy at all, but the worst thing I eat is probably ramen. I love it, though.  Will you bother having a party for your next birthday? Nah, I’m old. I just like doing something lowkey with my parents and brother. Although, last year my aunt and cousin came over for a game night and cheesecake for my birthday and that was fun. I’d be up for that again. If you're with someone right now, do you think it will last? Who was the last person you flipped off? I have no idea. That’s not something I really do. Like, ever. Do you currently have a job? No. What was the last movie that was unable to capture your interest? Hmm. I don’t remember.  Have you heard of the Irish actor Jonathan Rhys Meyers? The name rings a bell. Do you have something to do, that you would rather not do? There’s a few things. Are you, in any way, feeling hopeless right now? I’ve felt that way for a long time. Is there someone you just need to call and talk to? No. I don’t like talking on the phone. Are you one of those people who can eat anything and not gain a pound? Yes. I used to like that about myself, but it’s a problem for me, currently. These past few years I’ve lost weight due to health stuff and as someone who was already thin...yeah, not good. It’s caused problems for me. Are you nails painted at the moment? No. It’s been a few years since I’ve painted my nails. Is there a song you've been listening to lately on repeat? There’s a few songs lately that I always like to listen when listening to music. I just hit shuffle on my playlist, but there’s a few I like to just add to queue to make sure they come up. Lately, it’s been a couple Billie Eilish songs. Do you know who you're planning to ask to your grad prom? I’m 30 years old. I did go to prom; though, but I didn’t have a date. I just went with friends. When was the last time you went shopping? A few weeks ago. Is there anyone who did something absolutely hilarious today? Not so far. Again, it’s really early and I haven’t interacted with anyone, yet.  Are you having one of those days where you feel unattractive? “one of those days” is everyday for me, old sport. I feel unattractive and I am unattractive.  Do you like hot dogs? No. Do you ever get bored of your music collection and get new songs? I like to check out new music and add it to my playlist to add to the rotation, but I love my old stuff, too. Have you ever bought a designer purse? I’ve been gifted one. What's the limit on how much you would pay for a shirt? I’d say like $30. I mean, I’d obviously prefer cheaper if I can find a good sale or have a good coupon, but if not then yeah about $30. Would you ever like to see the Walk of Fame? Sure. Is it currently humid where you are? No. Have you been in any sort of physical pain today? Of course. Have you ever heard of the German movie Das Boot? Nope. Who were the last people you hung out with? My mom and brother. Has someone ever called you "obnoxious"? Not that I’m aware of.  Most commonly, do you obey rules, or break them? I’m more of a rule follower. Do you like making funny faces in pictures? Nah. Is there something you look back on and go "I can't believe I did that"? A lot of things... Are you good at offering advice? I think I used to be. At least, my friends seemed to think so since I was the one they always came to for advice. I wouldn’t say I am now, though. No one should ask me anything. When was the last time you had to resort to a map? I just use Google Maps if I need directions. I’ve never used an actual map. Your significant other: have you told them you love them lately? What was the last thing to confuse you? Life. How many different colors have you dyed your hair? 3. Do you know someone who always spells "bored" like "board"? No. Are you wearing make up right now? No. I haven’t worn makeup in over a year. Is there a phrase that you use a lot? Words and phrases, yeah. Are you old enough to vote? I’ve been old enough to vote for over 10 years now. Do you have a favorite pair of earrings? Yes, the rose gold Minnie Mouse earrings I got for Christmas. Have you ever been to Disneyworld/Disneyland? I’ve been to Disneyland a few times. Have you dated someone more than twice? Not more than twice, but twice. Are you a fan of Keira Knightley? I’m indifferent.  Have you ever resorted to alcohol to make you feel better? It never helped. Maybe briefly, but it was always short lived. Do you own a full-length mirror? Yeah. Do you ever go on PerezHilton.com to get all the celeb gossip? I see his tweets. Have you heard about Mel Gibson's rant/freakout? Yeah. That was ages ago. Do you wish your bedroom was bigger? Yes, that would be nice. My room is quite small and I have too much stuff. Are you aware of the significance of the date April 14th, 1912? I am, actually. Do you ever just lay back and watch the stars? No. Lately have you had much time to relax? You would think so since I spend majority of my time at home in bed. I wouldn’t call it relaxing, though. Not for me. I have health stuff, physically and mentally, and feel like crap, so. Did anything important/changing happen to you in March 2009? That was over 10 years ago, I don’t remember. I guess nothing that important happened. Nothing memorable, at least. Have you ever felt like a "new person"? Yes, but not in a good way. These past few years have changed me and not for the better. Do you own any expensive jewelry? Yes. What size is your TV? 32 inch, I think. Do you occasionally creep on people on Facebook? Nah. I don’t spend a lot of time on Facebook and what little time I do spend I’m just scrolling through my feed “liking” stuff and sharing an occasional post. I won’t say that I’ve never done that, though. ha. Who hasn’t. Has there been someone in your life that just wouldn't leave you alone? Yeah, in the past.  Do you hate to use public bathrooms? Yes. I very rarely do. Do you find most remixes of songs to be good or bad? It really just depends. I’ve heard good ones and I’ve heard shitty ones. There have been some I liked better than the original. Write something to someone who means a lot to you: Nah. I’ll just say goodnight!

[dvp95]

can’t breathe when you touch my sleeve - chapter 3

pairing: dan howell/phil lester

rating: e (eventually)

warnings: none

tags: alternate universe, slow burn, fluff & humour, tiny bit of inner turmoil wrt sexuality but trust me it’s not that deep, eventual smut, idiots in love

word count: 3,385 for this chapter (12,653 total)

summary: Dan keeps making a fool of himself in interviews, to the point where it’s basically a meme. Now he’s got to sit down for the better part of an hour and sell his show to the YouTuber he’d had a massive crush on when he was a teenager.

read from the beginning on ao3 or on tumblr!

read this chapter on ao3 or here!

Dan has been dreading the seemingly-inevitable call from his family, now that filmed interviews are being uploaded and live interviews are starting in the next few days, so he’s almost disappointed when it never comes.

Surely his parents know he’s in London. There’s promotion for his show on a couple different channels they watch, and his dad has always been fairly good at keeping up with entertainment news. Adrian follows him on Instagram, but - and Dan isn’t proud of this - he can’t remember if Adrian still lives in Wokingham or not. He can’t even remember how old Adrian is without doing the math.

So maybe they haven’t been keeping up with Netflix shit, maybe Adrian isn’t home to tell their parents that he’s in town, but surely, surely some well-meaning friend of the family will say something? That’s always been the case when he comes to town.

After almost a whole week, though, Dan cracks. He calls his mum. It goes to voicemail.

That makes him panic a little, but she texts him an, at work … call you when I’m home x. So, questionable ellipses usage aside, Dan is comfortably reassured that his entire family isn’t dead.

Dan busies himself with catching up on the Heatwave cast interviews he hasn’t watched yet. Patrick doesn’t like to watch them and Jaime couldn’t give a shit one way or the other, but Dan is unable to allow a video of him to exist without knowing exactly what it contains. That’s a control thing, mostly, but he also doesn’t want to be blindsided by a new Daniel Interview Meme that he doesn’t understand.

He types his own name into the YouTube search bar and feels his heartrate pick up when he sees a thumbnail from BBC Radio One.

Thinking about Phil makes his heart race like he’s a teenager with a crush, and he presses play just so he can listen to Phil talk. He can barely remember what he said in the interview, so completely caught up in Phil’s eyes and grin as he’d been.

The interview itself is good. Nothing special, in terms of the actual things they talk about, but Dan can feel the difference in the way he speaks to Phil versus the way he’s spoken to anyone else - comfort. He had been so immediately comfortable with their back-and-forth, only awkward because he’d been trying so hard not to think about what Phil looked like under his nice clothes.

Dan wonders if anyone else can see the difference or if he only notices because he’s so attuned to his own body language, has the advantage of knowing the whole context.

He scrolls idly through the comments and feels heat rise to his face.

Yeah. People noticed.

Lots of comments are just about Dan or the show or the lack of Patrick or Jaime, but there’s more than a few that are about Dan and Phil’s apparent chemistry. Phil, being an out gay man with no partner and a fanbase, probably has to deal with these types of comments all the time, but it’s new for Dan.

Dan shakes his head to try and clear it. He doesn’t want to get stuck in YouTube comments and feel impotent irritation every time someone replies, ‘uh, Daniel Howell is straight’, like they know him. Like he’s ever said that.

He’s been photographed with women, because he’s casually dated them over the past decade, but he’s never said he’s straight. And it never works out with them anyway.

Dating girls is fine - they’re all softness and little sighs and hands that look so extremely small wrapped in his own - but he doesn’t think he can ever be with one for a significant amount of time. That thought is one he usually keeps locked in his mental box, but. He doesn’t shy away from it this time.

Even if he could admit it to himself proper, it’s easier for Dan to just not talk about it publicly. He hasn’t dated anyone seriously enough for it to be an issue in ten years. Nobody needs to know that every time he’s inside a woman he remembers why it never progresses past that.

It’s fine. It’s always fine. It’s just, if he’s completely honest with himself, 'fine’ isn’t what he wants to settle for.

“Moot point anyway,” Dan mumbles to himself, clicking over to Phil’s channel for a distraction. “Not like you’re gonna do anything about it, you big fucking coward.”

Phil has uploaded the video he told Dan about when Dan was busy trying not to stare at his mouth. It’s such a welcome distraction that Dan almost doesn’t clock the title and thumbnail for the buffoonery they are.

IS MY DOG PSYCHIC?

The title doesn’t change when Dan blinks. Neither does the image of Thor, edited to be wearing round glasses in front of a crystal ball.

“What,” Dan says, clicking on the video before any of it really sinks in.

“Hi guys,” says Phil. He already looks like he’s trying not to laugh. “I know you read the title and you’re like, what, but I promise it is not clickbait! As I’m sure many of you know, my grandma had 'the gift’, and sometimes I think she passed it on to me. The question is, did I pass it on to my son?”

Phil pulls an over-exaggerated thoughtful expression and then breaks, giggling and shaking his head at himself.

“I know it’s stupid, but, I also figured it might be funny? I dunno, you tell me.”

It’s exactly as silly as Dan expects it to be. Phil sits on his floor with Thor while the dog 'reads’ his tarot cards. Dan can see why this video gave Phil a hard time in editing. There are a lot of close ups of Thor and the cards, filmed more like a comedy skit than a vlog.

He finds himself laughing along and getting way too invested in what the tarot cards mean, and he knows first hand how much work Phil put into this, so Dan clicks the share button before he can overthink it.

tbh watching amazingthorgi do anything could make a believer out of me, he tweets alongside the link.

Most of America is asleep still, but that doesn’t stop hundreds of people replying. Dan’s really got nothing better to do while he waits for his mum to call, so he settles in to respond to some of them. He makes a couple bad jokes, commiserates with some of them over not being able to have a dog yet, and ignores any mention of Phil.

Maybe that’s childish of him. He is sharing Phil’s work, after all. He sighs and replies to an innocuous question about how he knows Phil. met during this and then he let me meet his dog so now he’s not getting rid of me, Dan says with a link to the BBC Radio One interview.

His phone chirps with a Twitter notification and he taps it warily, still scrolling through replies on his laptop.

@AmazingPhil @danielhowell You saw his face now you’re a believer? He’ll tell your fortune anytime! It’s accompanied with dog and sparkle and crystal ball and, inexplicably, sock emojis.

Dan laughs, the sound of it almost surprising him. It’s impossible not to feel some kind of way when Phil is the way he is, so cheerful and dorky and fun.

He likes the tweet, but responds by messaging Phil - do you have me on notif or are you just always online - because he doesn’t want to add any more fuel to the fire that is Twitter stans. He can already imagine the argument threads about his sexuality that he usually tries so hard to avoid.

The thought of strangers picking apart something he’s not even comfortable with himself is abhorrent, makes him itch, and he puts on some older AmazingPhil videos to calm himself back down.

That depends

on?

Which one is lamer lmao

Phil’s voice filling the lonely hotel room and his words taking up space on Dan’s screen where something anxiety-inducing might have otherwise been is almost enough to make Dan as comfortable as Phil’s physical presence does.

Almost. It’s unreal how much Dan wants to reach through both of his screens to pull Phil closer.

Dan hides his smile in his hand, even though nobody is around to see it, and replies, tbh those are equally lame so you might as well go with the truth

I was on Twitter anyway. I really shouldn’t be, I’m supposed to be responding to emails. Phil keeps typing, then stops, then repeats that process a few times before he finally adds, I should go do that, but you can call or facetime me if you want to keep talking or whatever? It’s easier not to type/text while I’m doing emails lol

And, in a third message, a string of numbers. Phil’s phone number.

Well, that sounds better than using Phil’s videos as background noise. Dan shuts his laptop and gets out of bed to fuss with his hair.

“You’re such an idiot,” he tells his judgemental reflection. It, thankfully, does not respond.

Once he’s gotten his hair into some semblance of order - it’s mostly still straight from yesterday, but it got all sleep-mussed and a bit wavy in the front overnight - Dan tosses on a shirt and video calls the number Phil gave him.

Phil picks up with a big grin and sleepy eyes, and Dan almost hangs up on him to stop the heart palpitations in their tracks. “Hi!”

“Hey, you just wake up?” Dan asks, getting comfortable in the hotel room armchair. It feels weird to lie back down in bed while they’re chatting. Phil is at his desk, phone propped up so he can use both hands to type. His glasses are a little crooked and his shirt is too big on him, exposing his collarbones whenever he leans forward. Unfortunately, he looks like serious wank material right now.

“Yeah, had my first coffee already, though,” says Phil. “You would not like me before my coffee.”

“Barely like you now, mate,” Dan says to try and hide his blush at the idea of seeing Phil first thing in the morning. Phil just laughs. It’s tinny through Dan’s phone speaker, but it still makes Dan feel warm.

“You’re awfully chatty for someone who doesn’t like me,” says Phil.

“I’m only bored, don’t flatter yourself,” says Dan. “My mum’s supposed to call me in a few hours, so I’m just kind of waiting around til then.”

“Oh, yeah, you haven’t had the chance to go home yet, have you?” Phil’s tongue pokes out between his teeth as he concentrates on whatever he’s reading. “My mum would be going out of her gourd. When was the last time you went home?”

Dan doesn’t really like the way that Phil keeps calling it 'home.’ Wokingham hasn’t been home in a very long time.

He doesn’t want to get into that, though, so he just shrugs. “Uh, Christmas?”

“Dan,” Phil says, looking appalled. “It’s August.”

“I don’t live here,” says Dan. “And I’m busy. My family gets it.”

Phil hums, a little disapproving still. Dan has to bite his tongue so he doesn’t say anything scathing, reminding himself that some people actually like their parents.

It’s not that Dan doesn’t love them, because he does, it’s just. Complicated.

“Do you get to see your family often?” Dan asks, desperate to get the attention off of how shit a son he is.

“Not as often as I’d like,” says Phil. He sounds so genuinely sad about it, like he really would like nothing more than to go visit his parents every weekend. “My brother lives in town, so I see him a lot.”

“I didn’t know you had a brother.”

“Yeah, he’s -” Phil cuts himself off, then, and gives Dan an apologetic sort of look through his screen. “You don’t want to hear about my family.”

“I do,” Dan says, and he’s surprised by how much he means it. He shifts in the armchair. It isn’t that comfortable. “Dude, I already know every song on your iTunes, what’s so weird about telling me stuff about your family? They clearly mean a lot to you.”

He has no idea how to interpret the expression on Phil’s face, but whatever it is shifts into a smile as he turns back to his computer. “Okay, his name’s Martyn, he’s older than me, we work together -”

This time, Dan cuts him off. “You do? I haven’t seen him on your channel.”

“He’s not really interested in being on camera. We actually run IRL Merch together, although honestly it’s mostly Martyn.”

Phil explains the business to Dan, who feels himself getting more and more awed by the amount of stuff Phil does on any given day. It isn’t just sitting in front of his camera and then in front of his computer for a handful of hours.

Granted, Dan never thought that being a YouTuber was easy, or everyone would do it, but Phil seems to add things onto his plate that he doesn’t really need to do.

Dan listens for a little while, changing positions in the armchair a few times before he gives up and flops back onto the bed.

“Phil,” he says, holding his phone high above his head and making a face at the angle. It’s fine, really, Phil has barely been glancing at him this whole time. Now that Dan has some kind of idea about the number of people Phil works with, he gets the hours of emails thing. “Do you ever take a break? Hang out with your friends?”

“What friends?” Phil jokes, but Dan senses there’s some truth behind it.

“Okay, first of all,” says Dan, “big mood.”

Phil’s laugh seems like it’s surprised out of him, and his eyes flick to his phone again. They linger on Dan for a long moment before turning away again. Although, to be fair, that may be lag from shitty hotel wifi. “Is it?”

“Yeah, man, like I’ve got any fucking friends. Second of all, you need to take some breaks or you’re going to burn the fuck out.”

“Trust me, I know,” says Phil.

“I know Thor already reminds you to take breaks,” says Dan. “But he can’t force you to. I can.”

“You’re gonna force me to take breaks?” Phil hums, his eyebrows raising. “How exactly are you going to manage that when you’re back in Atlanta?”

“I can be very annoying with nothing but an internet connection,” Dan promises. “You wanna see?”

“No, no, I believe you, and I need to get this done, please don’t.”

They both laugh, quiet, and Dan curls up on his side to just watch Phil work for a little while. Phil runs his fingers through his hair every so often and mouths along to whatever he types. Dan has no idea how one person can simultaneously be the hottest and the most adorable thing ever.

“I have a brother too,” Dan offers.

“Do you?” Phil asks, more surprised than Dan expects him to be. “That’s not on your Wikipedia.”

“He doesn’t like the attention,” says Dan. It’s a half-truth. Most of what he says about his family are half-truths. “But you’re not, like, a stan account or the media or whatever.”

“Technically, I am both,” Phil jokes. “I’ll keep it to myself, though, don’t worry.”

Dan isn’t worried. He trusts Phil not to go blabbing about him on the radio, even with something as small as Adrian’s existence.

It feels a little strange to trust someone so immediately, and part of Dan wants to pull back, put some distance between them, because the combination of trust and a deepening crush can only spell disaster. He’s not going to do that. He’s only got Phil nearby for another two weeks.

After they’ve finished their media circus in London, then Edinburgh, then Dublin, Dan is off to France with Patrick and Jaime. They’re only hitting a handful of international media press, but that’s more than they were asked to do last year. It’s exciting to be expanding this way, to have something to point to and say, 'I did that before I was 30’.

And when they’re done with the press tour, Dan… goes home. Back to Atlanta, where his apartment is being sublet during his summer travelling.

They don’t even know yet if Heatwave will get a fourth season. It’s a bit of an industry joke that Netflix shows rarely make it past the third. Dan doesn’t even want to consider how Atlanta will feel without a steady filming job down the street.

Probably not much like home. Nowhere feels all that much like home, if Dan’s honest.

“Hey, you still with me?”

Dan blinks away the doom and gloom of his uncertain future and refocuses on the conversation he’s supposed to be a part of. Phil is looking at him now, the sort of undivided attention that makes Dan’s cheeks burn.

“Yeah, sorry,” says Dan. “I’m still here. Have you made a dent in those emails?”

Not the most graceful change of subject, but Phil allows it with a small snort. “No, for I am Sisyphus, doomed to answer a dozen emails only for another dozen to arrive.”

“Maybe if you didn’t have, like, three jobs, this wouldn’t be a problem,” Dan points out. “I get maybe two important emails a day. It’s great.”

“Maybe,” says Phil. He’s still just looking at Dan, his chin resting on an open palm.

“What?” Dan asks, feeling a smile tug at his lips.

Phil smiles back, brighter. “Nothing.”

There’s a warmth in his face, visible even through the mediocre FaceTime quality, that makes Dan’s stomach twist all up in knots. He doesn’t know how to handle that at all. “My mum’s calling I gotta go bye,” he says in one breath, hanging up before Phil can even react.

While he waits for his heart to stop pounding, Dan stares at the hotel ceiling and wonders what the fuck is wrong with him.

–

Dan’s mum does call, eventually. He’s been fucking around on Guild Wars and cursing the wifi for god only knows how long, refusing to check his phone so he doesn’t have to be faced with another message - or the lack of one - from Phil. Dan finishes the raid and then calls his mum back.

“Daniel, hi,” she says, sounding frazzled in the way she always seems to.

“Hey, mum.” It feels weird, now that he’s got her on the phone, but he pushes past that discomfort. “I was just calling to let you know that I’m in London.”

The sound of a door slamming comes through before his mum says, “Well, yes, dear. I know that.”

She doesn’t sound upset with him. More than anything, she sounds confused. Like she doesn’t know why he’s even telling her this. Like it hasn’t even occurred to her to nag her son for a visit. Dan has to swallow past a lump in his throat, not sure why he wishes she was angry.

“Oh,” he says. Allows a long moment of quiet to pass, just in case she wants to explain herself. She doesn’t. “Well. Okay. Do you - are you busy weekend after next? I could come see you before we leave for the continent.”

“That’s quite short notice, dear,” his mum says, and Dan experiences a dizzying rush of relief and distress before she continues. “But I’m sure I can make some time for dinner.”

Dan exhales. Dinner. He can do dinner.

“That sounds good,” he says. Another half-truth. “I’ll text you?”

“Yes, yes,” his mum says, already sounding distracted. “Text me and we’ll make a proper plan. Work hard til then, okay? I love you.”

“I love you too. Bye.”

The call ends almost as abruptly as his call with Phil, but Dan is okay with that.

im going to see my fam before i leave england jsyk, Dan texts to Phil. Phil sends him celebratory emojis in response. And maybe dinner with his family will be horrible, maybe it will be great, most likely it will be slightly uncomfortable, but at least he isn’t disappointing Phil on top of everyone else he’s let down.

[calumbringbackthewatermelonshirt]

Music for the Soul

a/n: wow, yet another piece that was supposed to be a one shot but I got carried away with.

Cal had officially decided his soulmate sucked. Who in their right mind played the cello at all hours of the night, especially some fucking irish dancing sounding tune? Sure the way the music skipped and danced, seemingly alive was beautiful, but at 2am? On a night when Cal had and early tour promo the next day? Hell, the only reason he’d be interested in finding her would to tell her that this shit wasn’t okay. Eventually she slowed it down to a soft melodic tune, something sweet and sorrowful. It sounded like something out of a movie soundtrack, and executed just as perfectly. Still, every once and awhile, she would stop and repeat a specific few bars over and over again until she could play them at quadruple the correct speed. While Cal may have been pissed at her timing, he had to give her credit where it was due. The discipline of her playing, the emotion conveyed through her music, it was like living art. It was all he could think about as her sorrowful tune lured him into sleep.

In your opinion, your soulmate had some weird fucking taste in music. The songs were just strange. They were, as far as you could tell, bass lines for the most part. All of them were decent, composed of a few deep notes hitting in repetitive patterns, occasionally switching to a more powerful rift. They weren’t bad, but they weren’t your taste either. To you, it sound like a pop/rock sort of mix, songs played on the radio probably. You weren’t sure though. Your musical knowledge was severely limited, seeing as you almost exclusively listened to the same types of classical music you played. The tunes were catchy, though, often implanting themselves in your brain with no hope of a resolution to a song you didn’t know. They distracted you as you played, and you found yourself adding them into your own songs. It was pretty fucking annoying. Especially when you were onstage. Once, you even caught yourself adding one of the basslines into a Beethoven, having to improvise so you didn’t embarrass yourself in front of Carnegie Hall. But, sometimes, you would pick up your own upright bass and pluck out the same tunes that ran through your head all day.||

“It feels good to be back in New York.” Luke was breathing in the smog of the city, the smell of hot dogs from the vendor across the street.

“What makes New York all that special, huh, Luke?” Cal, personally, didn’t give one fuck about the city either way. He did appreciate how easy it was smoke in this city, however.

“I don’t know man. I guess I just love the energy. The vibes, ya know?” Luke pulled a face as he spoke, raising his eyebrows up and down. Calum gave him shit often, but it was all in the name of friendship.

“Listen. I got all of us tickets go see a concert at Carnegie Hall. Y’all need some culture.” Ashton had been scrolling through places he wanted to visit on his phone. Being in this band took him all over the world, but Ashton barely got time to travel.

“Bro, why? No offense, but that’s not really our scene. How about we try and visit a club of some sorts instead? Discover the next big thing?” Michael was being truthful. Classical music really wasn’t their scene.

“Classical music is quite beautiful if you take the time to listen, Michael.” Cal kept thinking about his soulmate, her own music resonating in his ears. Her music, classical music, truly was beautiful.

“What the fuck, Cal? Since when are you some musical snob?” Luke was confused. He really didn’t know much about his dark haired band member.

“Oh, fuck off, won’t ya?” Cal took another drag of his cigarette, exhaling the smoke out of his lungs as he gazed at the skyline. He hadn’t ever told anyone about his soulmate. Everyone had their own versions of discovery. Some said their entire worlds turned to color as they touched for the first time, some had tattoos that matched the same in their partners, some even having necklaces that matched their significant others. Cal loved his, though. It really fit him, he thought. A few unlucky people didn’t have soulmates, destined to be alone. Cal had, for the most part, convinced everyone in his life the same was true for him. They were sorry for him, pitiful. He didn’t care, however. Cal knew, and while he had no intention of finding his soulmate, he was still content to listen to the soft melodic tunes flowing from the strings of his soulmate’s cello. ||

“Again? A-fucking-gain?” Your best friend, Emily, was freaking out. For no reason, in your opinion.

“Yes again. They somehow found the decency in their hearts to invited me back after my botched attempt at Beethoven. I can’t believe I let that fucking bassline get to me in the middle of a performance.” You were still incredibly angry with yourself. You prided yourself on your professionalism, your dedication and perfectionism. So when you let a few fucking notes corroded into a symphony like that? It was fucking wild that she let it happen.

“Bitch. This will be the second time in two fucking months you’ll have played Carnegie Hall. At twenty. You’re not even old enough to drink, and you’re selling out the most famous concert hall in the United States. Fuck you, bitch.” Emily took a sip of her coffee. The two of you had attended Julliard together, had been roommates all four years. Emily had been a surrealistic painter, however, as opposed to your musical capabilities. The two of you posed a nice contrast to each other, her flighty and always down for adventure, while you were studious and always considered every decision carefully.

“Whatever. I’m just ready to go on the tour. People just don’t appreciate the arts like they used to. This is pretty much a once in a lifetime opportunity, and I’m hella excited. I even did a little shopping and got a few dresses.” You had splurged a little, sure, but it was totally worth it. Like you had told Emily, this was a once in a lifetime thing. You were damn sure to make the most of it.

“You’re still going to the concert with me tonight right?”  Emily had been blabbering on nonstop about this concert for weeks. Normally, you would have insisted she take someone else, especially this close to such an important concert. But, for reasons you couldn’t explain, some strange feeling had said you need to be at the concert, persistent and foreign to anything you had felt before. So you had told Emily that you would go with her.

“Yeah. I mean, I said I would. What the name of this band again? I keep forgetting.” You didn’t really care about the band, but it was supposedly sold out at Madison Square Garden. You figure that you had a decent chance of meeting your soulmate among almost twenty thousand people. Especially with that damn feeling you couldn’t shake. It made you start thinking about everything, all the variables and potentials. Without noticing, you started absentmindedly tapping out the bass line you soulmate was playing on the table with your nails. Emily noticed and smiled a little. She had already been lucky enough to have found her soulmate already, and while you had resisted as much as possible, she was always trying to help you find the one.

“5 seconds of summer. I really think you’ll like them, even though they’re not exactly your scene.”

“Wait, I think I’ve heard of them actually. Aren’t they that one band with the song young-something?”

“Youngblood, dumbass. I thought you were going to listen to some of their songs.”

“I’m sorry this Bach is really kicking my ass. I should get going, actually. I need to practice some more before tomorrow night.” You gave Emily a quick hug and walked to where your car was parked on the street. Maybe you could find the time to listen to a few tracks, at least.||

“Well, well, well. Here we are. Madison Square Garden.” Luke was standing in the middle of the stage, looking out over the stadium that would soon be filled with almost twenty thousand people.

“Madison Square Garden, sold out.” Ashton corrected Luke. They deserved it after everything.

“You good, Cal?” Michael, Luke and Ash were all standing together in the middle of the stage, but when michael looked over and their fourth bandmate, he found him sitting almost dejectedly against an amp. Michael studied his bassist for a moment, taking in the furrowed brow and almost scowl on his face.

“Hmm? Yeah, yeah, I’m great. Madison Square Garden.” Cal stood, brushed himself off and walked to join his other bandmates in the center of the stage. He had been finding himself thinking of his soulmate more and more each day. Sure he had always wondered about her, but why couldn’t he get her out of his head lately? He was starting to get concerned that it would interfere with performance tonight. She hadn’t even been playing much lately, and yet she was in his head more than ever. ||

“Why did I let you convince me to wear this? It’s not me.” Emily and convinced you to wear a tight and short blue plaid skirt, doc martens, and a white tube style tank top to the concert. She had even done your makeup and hair.

“Shut up, you look hot as fucking hell.” Emily was really paying attention to you. She was bouncing on her heels with anticipation, and was even more excited for being first in line. She had dragged you out here about five hours prior to when the concert door opened and the line had just started forming behind the two of you about an hour ago. Still, if it made Emily this happy, you supposed it was worth it. The concert was supposed to start in less than half an hour, but all you really wanted was to be at home, running though pieces on your cello. Instead you settled for fingering through them and humming the melodies softly to yourself. It was barely audible, but as you closed your eyes and concentrated in the music, your expression slowly slipped into a smile. ||

Cal couldn’t quite figure out why, but he was nervous. For the first time in about a year. His feelings had been all out of whack lately. No matter how hard he tried, Cal couldn’t stop thinking about how nervous he was for the show tonight. He was sitting with his head in his hands in the dressing room when it started. The melodies of Bach, Beethoven, even a few du Pre. They weren’t the same as before, though. No, this time, his soulmate was singing. Her voice was soft, like she didn’t want to be heard, but Cal could still tell there was a sort of power behind it. This voice made him feel the same way that hot chocolate on a cold day did, warm and safe. It lit him up from inside, calming him and wiping out any nerves that he felt, leaving mere shadows of the butterflies in his gut. Cal’s lips curled up, and he stood. Cal had never felt more excited to get up on stage. As he did, he couldn't help but sense that you were in the crowd, watching him, perhaps even dancing as he sang. It gave him a different kind of rush, the type that alcohol nor sex could. When he was on stage, all the other boys could tell there was something different to his performance that night. Something more energized and excitable. Tonight, passion reverberated through the basslines he played. ||

@marshmallowtraver