#and i doubt i can do art for each chapter anymore

[a-small-cretur]

//Office AU

Outfits for the gala

Link to the fic here

been a while I got the time to draw something meaningful, school is just trying to kill me

[mrs-snape5984]

“As long as I'm with you, I've got a smile on my face…”

“Save your tears, it'll be okay. All I know is you're here with me…” (“Here with me” by D4vd)

Suffering from ME/CFS makes me feel like my whole world is falling apart in front of my eyes. Since I’ve already lost so much joy and so many abilities due to this devastating disease, my continuing loss seems to increase even further.

As some of you might know, do I love to write my own stories about Severus and Julia just as much as I enjoy using my tumblr blog as some kind of journal, whenever I’ve commissioned another artwork. It’s my way of rolling out a red carpet for the artists of Snapedom…it’s my way of honouring them for their talent in their profession. Commissioning those amazing people and letting them make my ideas and fantasies come to life, is my very own manner of coping with my physical and emotional pain.

And now, this coping mechanism seems to crumble into pieces as well as everything else, that I’ve already lost! It hurts me to admit, that my brain fog takes advantage of my capability to create vivid images with my words. My thoughts are getting blurry and chaotic. I’m struggling to find the right words to express my emotions (it’s even worse in my native language German than in English!!)…and this scares me to hell!

My mind was the only place, where I could find some shelter from my infuriating and terrifying reality of losing myself to ME/CFS. What if I forfeit my only - just barely existing- talent now?? How should I flee this nightmare of existence if writing wouldn’t be an option anymore?! How should I express my gratitude towards all those marvellous artists of Snapedom, who are all weaving my emotional comfort blanket with each piece of their art?!?

I don’t want to give up on my writing…and I won’t…even though my pride would probably fade away with each badly written chapter of my fictions…and with each unworthy post on my blog. I must admit, that I’m already acknowledging the loss of quality. 🥺

I found an inspiring poem about the importance of staying resilient, no matter how difficult the hardships of life might become, and I want to share it with you:

"KEEP GOING" (Better known as "DON'T QUIT") by Edgar A. Guest

When things go wrong, as they sometimes will, When the road you're trudging seems all uphill, When the funds are low and debts are high, And you want to smile but have to sigh.

When care is pressing you down a bit, Rest, if you must, but DON'T YOU QUIT!

Life is queer with its twists and turns, As everyone of us sometimes learns, And many a failure turns about,

When he might have won if he'd stuck it out, Don't give up though the pace seems slow, You might succeed with another blow.

Often the struggler has given up, When he might captured the victor's cup.

And he learned too late, when the night slipped down, How close he was to the golden crown,

Success is failure turned inside out, The silver tint on clouds of doubt, And you never can tell how close you are, It may be near when it seems afar,

So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit, It's when things seem worst that you mustn't quit.

My dear @mmad-lover, I can’t stress enough how grateful I am for your dedication to this stunning piece of art and believe me, it was worth every single second of waiting! Paula, I was incredibly touched to hear, that my request seemed to be something special, something personal to you. I can assure you, that, indeed, all of my ideas have a profound meaning to me and I’m glad that you’re such an empathetic person, who sensed that particular importance of your art to me. Your devotion to this drawing is palpable in every single detail, every line of your brushes. You created exactly the mood, that I wished for Severus and Julia. It doesn’t matter that the world is burning to the ground around them, they will always have each other’s backs! Just like I’m relying on Severus for more than 21 years now. Thank you for everything, you precious soul! I’m glad that I met you and I hope, we’ll stay in touch. 🥹

🖤Severus & Julia🖤

🖤Sevy & Jules🖤

[ganondoodle]

I only just found your fancomic and art now and I’m really curious as to where Farore, Nayru and Din fit in with your AU, and where Courage fits in with it all too; is the first Link/hero that Hylia chose supposed to be the reincarnation of Courage?

Well, you see, i kinda took the zelda lore and remixed it until it tasted good to me uwu

actual answer is i rewrote the lore .. or put it in a different context so it might be confusing at first and i dont know just how much into detail you want me to explain bc .. theres alot .. like ALOT

to sum it up rly shortly:

in my AU/comic the gods (here a rough sketch i did last time i redesigned them, tho this is only nayru, actually all three are one entity but also not, like three bodies melted together at the hips down)

-each created a world, and once life started to thrive there they chose a mortal to call them to come to them, the gods then killed them and used the mortals spirit to create a deity, not mortal, but no god either, as their servant

"Courage" (not actually their name, just a word to call them since their language is long lost) is the first one to be created, but fails the purpose the gods had intended for them rather quickly; so they abandon them and flood the world until nothing but Courage survives, out of madness/desperation Courage then destroys the ancient statue of the gods and promptly discovers a path to another world through it

and that is the second world, in which "Demise" (also not his actual name) resides, he is the deity of that world and has so far succeeded, although not quite like the gods intended; he was told essentially the same prophecy we hear in the intro of skyward sword (invasion of a monster etc.) this monster is in this case Courage, who attacks Demise, who in turn seals Courage away quite easily, which isnt how the prophecy went, he was supposed to die, which makes him doubt the whole plan and starts intentionally delaying working further on it, so long in fact that Courage, now mishapen (similar to the imprisoned) and mindless, breaks free of the seal Demise then kills them, but loses one of his blade spirits in the fight (he used to have two here in my AU), now that the gods plan is not doable anymore (since Courage is dead) they abandon him and his world alot of stuff happens here, inclusing mortals turning to war, then against him, and him destroying his version of the triforce as he saw it as the source of the conflicts; but in the end his world dies a slow death by drought, just like Courage he destroys the ancient statue of the gods in his world and woop theres a path there

which is Hylias world, so, Demise is taken by wrath and grief as this world was allowed to thrive while his own died seeks to reach the the gods in revenge by all means necessarry but is quickly stopped by Hylia, who instead of sealing him like she was ordered to, spares his life, bc who she encountered was not what she was told, and wishes to know why that is, why the gods would lie to her

this is where the comic itself starts, the first encounter of her and demise is the first chapter :3

it is a theme that courage is very similar to link and demise to ganondorf (tho my hylia not that much to zelda hmmmm) but here it has no ACTUAL connection, and the triforce trio as we know in canon has no actual great lineage, no reincarnation, just mortals manipulated by the gods to make them do their bidding after all three deities revolted against being used as the gods puppets

as you can see, im very bad a summing anything up, i hope this didnt sound too lame or something, there is alot of thought and heart put into this story (i even have the background stories of each deity from before they were deities, even tho it doesnt come up in the comic) and i hope i will keep my motivation and passion for this giant project alive enough to get at least more than one chapter done (i have a bad track record of failed comics, im horribly afraid of abandoning this one too bc i put so much more work and love into it already, i guess it depends on the support from you guys how far i will be able to go qwq)

feel free to ask me anything about it, cant promise to respond right away but i cherish nice asks to a point that i dont want to post answers bc then its gone from my inbox lmao

anyway, its 3 am, goodnight and perhaps ... hopefully this gave you a rough idea of what im going for >o<

[ksbbb]

ur okay to answer all of the questions? 🤭😅😆

😂😂😂 for you? I will 🫂

list 3 positive things about your current fandom(s)? A lot of material to work with considering we have to fill in gaps. Multiple characters to use. Lost of works to explore and plus there’s so many head canons that you can get lost and have a whole day to fill. 😂 they finished the show too. I will add that. Some shows get canceled.

A head cannon you weren’t sure about at first but you have come to like?

Liam not being able to cook. It sounds silly but at first I wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt and I enjoy the thought of Theo being the cook and perfectionist with it.

a character that fandom has helped you appreciate?

Derek Hale. LISTEN. Don’t come for me. Originally I didn’t like Derek because he was mean to Scott at first and I didn’t like how he threw Isaac out of the loft with no place to go. 😤 however, I’ve come to the conclusion through the fandom that he has grown and he went through a lot. He also did come back to help Scott.

say something nice about a ship you don't ship (it can be another ship in your fandom, a mutual's OTP, etc)

Stalia. Stiles helping Malia and them looking out for each other was always really sweet to me.

Something you see in fics a lot and love

Theo moving in with Liam. I think we have established this happened for real in our teen wolf world.

Something you see in art a lot and love

Theo and Liam in Theo’s truck driving around.

your favorite tropes to read/write/draw

Enemies to lovers

Sharing a bed

Reluctant friends/allies

you hope more people will come to appreciate ___ (a ship, a trope, an episode, etc)

Season 5 . Yes it was a little rough and a lot of holes, but we got Theo and the chimera pack. It also gave a horror type vibe which I loved .

Plus plus… we were introduced to

A ship that isn’t your OTP but you enjoy

Scisaac. I don’t think anything else needs to be said.

a blog (mutual or one you follow) that has made your fandom experience brighter

@thiamsxbitch @wolfboy88

If you’re a writer or an artist what work are you proud of making? 

Hmmm. I think I always come back to this but

your favorite type of fandom event (gift exchange, ship week, secret santa, prompt meme, etc)

Thiam gift exchange was fun. I also liked the thiam reverse big bang and seeing all the artwork

Compliment someone else in your fandom

Well… that’s hard fjfjfj. I like everyone but I will say that green zone is the best written fic I’ve read in a long time. @chasing-chimeras

A ship that always makes you smile 

Scira . 💙💙 so wholesome

A character that always makes you smile

Scott

A thing in canon that everyone loves that you also love

Morey. I mean, Jeff didn’t screw that up in in the show. The movie we won’t discuss .

tiny detail in canon that you want more people to appreciate

The development of Derek and Scott’s relationship from angry stand offish allies to brothers. I think it’s cute and now that I like Derek I love it. 😂

Your first fandom

Vampire diaries but I wasn’t a writer or artist for it

Your current fandom

Teen wolf

All American

Shadow and bone

Supernatural

a fandom you're not active in anymore but that you still really like

Vampire diaries

A fandom friend you have known the longest

@waterloou 🫂

the fandom you're curious about because of a mutual

Hmm 🤔 idk. I’d have to think but one tree hill has been on my mind to watch because of you @thiamsxbitch

how has fandom positively impacted your life?

I met some fantastic people and for that I will be eternally thankful

A piece of advice for taking care of yourself in fandom spaces?

Take breaks and don’t look at numbers. It’s easy to get lost in it but what’s important is that you enjoy what you’re doing. If you don’t like it and it becomes a constant stress for more likes or comments, then it’s time to step away.

It should be fun

[late-to-the-magnus-archives]

Blood and sand - Chapter Fifteen

“Only one can win the Games.”

And no one had yet. “I know, sir.”

“You’re throwing away your life.”

No, no, damn it, no. “You can change it. It’s your rules! You could make it different,” said Luke.

A pause. Hastur went entirely still, a billowing ocean frozen as a portrait. “Not anymore.”

Written for the @malevolentmadnessmixup. Art by @aktrashpanda.

>>>>READ ON AO3 OR BELOW<<<<

----------

Chapter Fifteen: John

Luke felt like a whole new person as he exited the stairs.

They deposited him in the hallway, not in the arena, and he was grateful. He didn’t want to see anybody just yet.

For the first time in his life, he had what felt like a major plan. This was far more concrete than escape into the Dreamlands and find a way to bring back Parker. This was specific. This was detailed.

He refused to believe it was out of reach. It could be done. All he had to do was get the adults who’d been kind to him to agree.

Though there was also the problem of Arthur.

Arthur couldn’t see. He couldn’t fight like this. Did he have magic? He’d used some occasionally, rarely, but generally had fought more like a cornered dog than anything else, all teeth and desperation.

This was going to be tricky.

Luke stepped aside for larger warriors who marched by, hoofs stomping and claws grasping. He peeked in the dining room, but none of his adults were there.

He went to the dorms; not there, either. Hm. He stood and thought.

The medical wing. Maybe. Luke made his way down the hall toward it.

What do you know? All four of them were in there.

Arthur had a black eye. John sort of hovered by him, robes torn, black ichor staining them. Oscar lay flat on one of the little beds, holding an ice pack to his face. Dennis lurked in the corner, looking disgruntled and bloody; stitches lined his cheek.

Luke looked around. “What happened?”

And all four of them looked caught.

“Luke?” said Arthur, sitting up, and evidently unaware of the many, many black tentacles hovering around him, as though to protect him from the world.

Luke frowned. He crossed his arms, stern as Parker with a witness. “No one was bleeding when I left.”

“Shit,” Dennis replied.

Arthur sighed. “I have no fucking idea,” he said, and lay back down.

Then John decided to answer. “That one,” said John, pointing at Oscar, “is here illicitly.”

“I am not,” said Oscar.

“And that one,” said John, pointing at Dennis, “is fucking pissed about it.” Arthur snorted. John snorted. They shared a deeply inappropriate laugh, a sound somehow so intimate it made Luke feel like he was eavesdropping on something.

“So?” said Luke.

Oscar sighed. “So we’ve discussed it, and I must leave by morning. I’m sorry, son.”

Discussed it seemed to be code for we all beat on each other until we got tired. Damn it. Part of his plan was about to walk out the door. “I need some teaching before you go. Please.”

And Oscar sat up.

Several of the nurse-things immediately swarmed him, hovering and translucent, but he waved away whatever they said with his hand and his attitude. “Happy to,” he said.

Luke looked. Oscar was exhausted, tapped out; he had more than a few bruises, and hadn't even addressed them. Luke frowned. “It can wait a bit.”

“Nonsense,” said Oscar.

“Did you all fight, or something?” said Luke.

“Or something,” muttered Arthur, and he and John laughed again at nothing.

Well, whatever. Inside jokes weren’t meant to be understood. “Thank you, sir.”

“Of course, son,” said Oscar. “It’s why I’m here.”

“To hell with you,” muttered Dennis, and scowled as they both walked out.

#

Luke explained the plan as he healed Oscar.

Oscar had doubts about the plan as he was healed.

“You’re only going to get one shot at this,” Oscar said. “And it’s risky. If someone’s got some kind of resistance…”

“That’s where John comes in.”

Oscar looked thoughtful. “And Arthur?”

“I don’t… know what to do about Arthur.”

“No one does right now. Normally, being blinded would be enough to get him excused from the Games; it’s not entertaining for you-know-who. However, it wasn’t an injury. He was blind already when he came in here, and the arena won’t let him go.”

“He wouldn’t leave, anyway,” said Luke.

“You’re right. You’ve got the breadth of him.”

Luke doubled down on the plan. “This has to work. It will. Have faith, sir.”

Oscar laughed as if surprised. “From the mouths of babes… All right. All right, son. I’ll help as I can before leaving.”

“Thank you, sir.”

Oscar turned and put his hands on Luke’s shoulders. “May the blessing of light be on you—light without and light within,” he said softly, eyes closed as if praying it, as if willing it. “May the blessing of the rain be on you; may it beat upon your spirit and wash it fair and clean, and leave there a shining pool where the blue and Heaven shines, and sometimes a star. And may the blessing of the earth be on you, soft under your feet as you pass along the roads, soft under you as you lie out on it, tired at the end of day, and may it rest easy over you when, at last, you lie out under it. May it rest so lightly over you that your soul may be out from under it quickly, up and off and on its way to God. And now may the Lord bless you, and bless you kindly. Amen.”

Luke found himself tearing up and wasn’t even sure why. What Oscar prayed to may or may not be real, may or may not hear him; but Oscar’s care and Oscar’s faith were very real, and there was a preciousness to both. He felt blessed. Watched. Maybe even cared for. Every little bit helped. “Thank you,” Luke whispered.

Oscar patted his back. “Of course. Let’s talk about this spell of yours.”

#

Luke returned to the medical ward alone.

Arthur was asleep, snoring lightly—almost a cute sound, sort of buzzing—while John stood over him, hovering, his many tentacles in the air.

Luke couldn’t help making comparisons. Hastur was symmetrical, beautiful and horrible, perfect to look at and absolutely maddening. John was just… a mess. His sides were not symmetrical. He stood hunched, angling, most of his face (if he had one) hidden in his robe, golden eyes gleaming in its gloom. He was so wide he almost seemed round; tentacles poked through his hole-ridden robe all over, as if those were the only limbs he had.

All the eyes fixed on Luke.

Luke swallowed. “John?”

“Yes.” The growl… it was Hastur’s, only not room-rumbling.

For Parker. “I have a plan for what to do at the end of the games.”

“Here’s my plan: you can go to hell,” said John.

Wow.

“You took me from him,” John snarled in Hastur’s voice but not Hastur’s voice, and the more John spoke, the more Luke knew he would be able to tell them apart. “We weren’t ready. I was hidden in him, damn you! Do you know what we had to do to make that work?”

“No, sir, I don’t,” said Luke. “And I’m sorry it happened, but it had to. Please listen. I have a plan. That, and I know what you are.”

John stared. The gold of his eyes flickered and darkened, like a fire burning down to embers. “Do you?” he said, low.

Luke felt a little insane being so honest. ��Yes. You’re the missing piece of—”

Luke didn’t even see John move.

Suddenly, he was grabbed. He slammed into the wall, pressed against it, wind knocked out of him.

“Don’t you dare finish that sentence!” John snarled, all monster, and his mouth didn’t fit right—saliva slid between his teeth and to the floor, hissing, burning into the tiles.

Luke shook. Fear briefly stole his words. If this went well (and it had to), he never wanted to fight anyone again after this. “Okay,” he agreed. “Okay, I won’t. I promise.”

John changed. Something about his form trembled, shifted, and Luke suddenly got the impression he was… embarrassed? He dropped Luke. “Sorry,” he mumbled. “Not used to… being able to act.”

What a weird thing to say. Luke still shook, but he stood. “I understand.”

“No, you don’t,” John snapped.

Except he did. “I do, though,” said Luke. “Everything is different for me. I’m on my own, and I’ve got weird magic powers, and my brother is still dead, and it’s all different.”

That shouldn’t have worked, yet John seemed stunned. His mismatched tentacles drooped. “I heard you telling Arthur. You’re here for Parker.”

For Parker. Parker’s resurrection was not guaranteed. Still, it was an opening. It was… vulnerable. For just this moment, John was listening, and Luke dared not let that slip by. “Sir, no one is meant to win this contest.”

John raised his tentacles, and magic bloomed. Suddenly, the sounds of this room—shouts outside, footsteps, medical drips and running faucets—all dimmed. “Explain that.”

Such a growl. It would be scarier if Luke hadn’t heard Hastur’s first. “He never meant anyone to win. Not really. It’s why they’re always bringing in new warriors. There can’t be a last one standing, then. Hastur wants to die here.”

John stared. He looked like a statue of himself, frozen.

“I know a way we can win,” said Luke.

“He wants to…” John stammered.

Luke waited.

John exhaled shakily. “You mean you can win,” he said with more suspicion than Luke had ever heard in his life. “Arthur needs this. If I have to rip your fucking head off to ensure he gets it, I will.”

Yikes. “Nobody wins if I die,” Luke dared, because it was true. “The plan requires my magic. If I’m out of the picture, they’ll just bring in more warriors forever, and there’ll never be an end.”

John shuddered. “Arthur needs this.”

“He needs to be freed.” Luke clenched his fists, trying so hard to sound grown. “If we win, and it goes how I think… that Charlie Dowd guy will be freed, too.” He couldn’t be sure of that, and yet he was sure. If the games were done, Hastur wouldn’t need Dowd anymore. And if this were Luke’s new job (or whatever they were calling it), surely Luke could ask for that favor. He could try, anyway.

John, fortunately, seemed to be buying what Luke was selling. “He’d be free,” he murmured, thoughtfully.

“Yes,” said Luke. “But I need your help.”

John sighed. He turned his round, uneven body to look at Arthur.

“I don’t know how he can fight,” Luke said softly.

“I’ll take care of Arthur,” said John.

“I mean… since he’s blind,” said Luke.

“I fucking said I’ll take care of him!” John growled.

Yikes and yikes. “Yes, sir.”

John studied him. “Why did you do this to me?”

Oh. “Gave you a… a body?”

“Yes. Pulling me out of him. Ripping me away. Why?”

“To save his life.”

John hunched. “I was hurting him?” he said in a shockingly small voice.

Luke gentled his tone “Yes,” he said.

John drooped. “Fuck,” he said.

“You’re not hurting him now,” said Luke quickly.

John looked at him. “You’re a fucking weird kid.”

Luke looked down, years of self-preservation kicking in. “Yes, sir.”

John didn’t apologize. He returned to Arthur, hovering again.

Luke got the weirdest feeling that had actually been a compliment. John was very strange. “Don’t you want to hear the plan?”

“When Arthur is awake.” John’s tentacle-tips touched Arthur’s face.

Arthur made a sound and pushed at them, stubborn even in his sleep.

John made a pleased sound. “Arthur will wake soon. Then we will have your plan.”

“I’ll go get some food,” Luke said because he needed to get away, and made up for it by bringing back enough for all three of them.

#

The god called Lilith came for Oscar in the morning. It was very early, barely dawn, but Luke followed Oscar out because he wanted to see.

It didn’t really explain anything.

The woman was beautiful; from here, she looked almost human, with long dark hair, and softly violent skin, and eyes that gleamed silver. Something about the way she stood was so strange, just beside her blindingly white chariot and its enormous winged-lions. She stood, he realized, like saints he’d seen around Catholic churches—somehow inhuman, above human, and held her hand out over the sand, palm down.

Oscar knelt and looked up at her with such intensity, with a look Luke could not for the life of him name, but knew he’d never seen its ilk before. It felt intimate. It felt private. His cheeks heated.

This god—this Lilith, who’d come to fetch her weird priest—looked directly at Luke for one moment. Luke startled. Her face was that face—the face of the weirdo guy who’d gotten Luke into all this. It was narrower, the lips fuller, but unquestionably the same.

Utterly confused, Luke stared.

She seemed to find that funny, and laughed, and—

Bells-pealing-bright-dancing-sharp-white-ephemeral…

Luke came to on his hands and knees and shook his head. They were gone; the weird flying chariot and its lions were gone, along with her, and her priest.

Weird. So very weird. And the way Oscar had looked at her… Luke really couldn’t put a word to it. It was an agony, of sorts, but it was ecstasy, too, and so hungry, and so determined, and Luke would never forget it.

The suns were barely risen, and Luke decided to go back to bed. He wouldn’t be talking about this. He wasn’t sure what he’d seen, but he knew at least that some of it was meant only for them.

[chapter sixteen] [masterpost]

[dominimoonbeam]

Stargazing Underground

I’m ALMOST done with edits on this one and on to formatting and publishing so I commissioned @slushrottweiler​ to do some character art! There is something magical about SEEING your characters. Or any characters! Seriously, go commission Slush if you’re looking for an artist!

STARGAZING UNDERGROUND is another sci-fi romance and I can’t wait to share it! It’s about these two getting stuck in a no-tech underground prison together and having to learn to trust each other to survive.

Chapter One under the cut. <3

CHAPTER ONE

Alarms sounded over screams and explosions, all echoing up through the airducts to chase them. He crawled behind her, into the dark and away from everything. When she couldn’t crawl anymore, he dragged her.

His muscles screamed, raw pain warring with the dull agony of exhaustion.

He got them all the way to the end of the narrow duct, farther than they’d ever made it before, where starlight pierced the darkness. He twisted around and kicked until his back hit the cold metal wall. Tipping his head up, Iris stared. Tears gathered against his vision when he saw the sky out that long rectangular shaft. The air was colder, cleaner, and his breath shivered from his lungs with pained longing. Almost there.

“Go,” Verona whispered. “I’ll follow.”

She said it but her limbs didn’t move. Her muscles didn’t even flex with the thought of moving.

Her arm was broken. He had seen it clearly before they made their escape. Neither of them had been in any condition for it, but it was their last chance, their last hope—their last move.

If it was just her arm that was broken, he wouldn’t doubt her ability to climb out of there. If anyone could do it, Verona could. But it wasn’t just a broken arm.

Iris gathered her in his lap, her back to his chest so that maybe she would smell the air too. Her blood oozed across his naked abdomen and soaked into his pants.

“Leave,” she urged, as though he’d said all the things he’d been thinking. “I would have left you.”

Tears spilled over his lashes and a grim smile tugged at the gashes in his lips. “Liar. If you’d left me from the start this wouldn’t have happened. If you’d left me…” he choked on the last hour of his life. It was too much. They’d been circling their own deaths for months, clawing to survive, fighting together against everyone else in that pit, but the last hour had been the worst of it all.

“Go,” she said again, voice thinning, but with the persistent nudge of a friend urging him onto a shuttle to leave home and see the galaxy. Like he was making a big deal out of nothing and would laugh later at how he almost didn’t go. But there wasn’t going to be a later. Not for him and not for them.

“It won’t change,” she said matter-of-factly, but it made swallowing hard because he knew what she was really saying—after months in that place with her, he knew everything about her. She didn’t use many words, but he heard her now. He heard her in her movements and her stillness, and right now, broken and bleeding out in his arms, she was promising to love him the same even if he left her there to die.

And she meant it. He knew she did. She would think no less of him, and it would not tarnish her understanding of his feelings for her. She would not hurt if he left her now. She would understand.

Iris Eleusine tipped his head back and stared at the sky far above, stars blinking back mercilessly. “I can’t.” He was so tired. When had he last slept? Last eaten? One hand throbbed, crushed, and one side of his face was swelling up under split flesh. He was filthy, caked in blood, sweat, and worse.

Verona gave a tired grunt. “You can make it,” she said.

He could make it. He could finally escape and at the very least, die on the ground under the naked sky. He could, but he curled his arms around her. His hands pressed over the largest gash in her side, determined to hold her together for as long as possible. “I won’t.” He was capable of escaping, of crawling out of that place. But who would he be if he did? And what was the point if she wasn’t with him?

CHAPTER TWO

...four months earlier.

[mehoymalloy]

20 questions for fic writers

Thanks for the tag, @mr-jaybird! No tags for me, but please feel free to steal and tag me if ya like!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

22

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

237,427

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Critical Role, Horizon, and Stray Gods!

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Prometheus Bound (Horizon; Aloy/Tilda), Sing for Me (Stray Gods; Grace/Persephone), and then my oldest series (Fine Art and Forgeries), which are all takes on canon scenes from Tilda's POV, coincidentally by order of publication: Study of a Young Woman, A Scene from Two Views, and The Gallant Conversation.

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I do! I genuinely appreciate every one, and if someone takes the time to say something to me, I like to return that gesture in kind (though I think I fell behind in the chaos of Stray Gods Prompt Week, I'll have to go chapter by chapter and see lol).

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Prometheus Bound, by a long shot.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

What's a happy ending? (I'm joking, that would likely go to Radiance (Horizon; Regalla/Nasadi).

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not to my face lol.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I do! I enjoy writing fucked up people fuck each other (though Sing for Me's the exception to that, and I do have some healthier smut on the way in the form of Liliana/Otohan and Grace/Athena).

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

Nope!

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Nope (I hope)!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope (not that I'm aware)!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Not yet, but a friend and I are planning to co-write a couple fics in the future!

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

I truthfully don't read much fanfic anymore, and while I'm tempted to say Imogen/Otohan as that's what's had me in a chokehold for the past nine months, that's also a more recent development. So if we're talking all time, I'd say my most read ship was (and I'm dating myself here) Hermione/Bellatrix. Can you tell I've always enjoyed enemies to lovers as a trope?

15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

I don't have any I don't intend to finish!

16. What are your writing strengths?

I think I'm pretty good at describing settings and imagery as well and introspection.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

DIALOGUE.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

It's something I would likely never attempt.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Horizon, specifically Forbidden West!

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

God that's a hard question... From a technical standpoint, I think A Dance With Danger is the one I'm most proud of. It really challenged me in many ways (altering a canon scene in one BIG way, writing lots of dialogue that still managed to flow well in a relatively short time, and most of all, writing an Imogen/Otohan first meeting in canon context, and early on in the campaign at that).

Runner ups would likely be Prometheus Bound, Let Me Lay Waste to Thee (Critical Role; Imogen/Otohan, THEE fic that started everything lol), and When the Darkness Comes (Horizon; Silga & Untalla aka MY GIRLS).

[goforth-ladymidnight]

On ACOTAR Faeries and Lying

I don’t know if this has been talked about before, but I think SJM really kneecapped her faerie characters by taking away everything that made them, well, faerie. Pointy ears and eternal youth are not enough for me. There’s some great faerie lore that we’re introduced to in the first few chapters of ACOTAR: their aversion to iron, addictive food, their inability to lie, etc. And then later on it’s revealed that faerie food just tastes really good, the aversion to iron was a ruse, and they can lie. They lied about lying.

Lucien leaned back in his chair, smiling with feline delight. “Of course we can lie. We find lying to be an art. And we lied when we told those ancient mortals that we couldn’t speak an untruth. How else would we get them to trust us and do our bidding?”

I think the only reason that was mentioned was because of a “provision” in the Treaty:

“That was all a lie. There was no provision for that in the Treaty. You can kill as many innocent faeries as you want and never suffer the consequences. You just killed Andras, sent out by Tamlin as that day’s sacrifice.” [Alis]

Imagine if there was a provision after all, and Tamlin meant it when he said that he would take on Feyre’s life-debt and let her return to the mortal lands. That way we have no reason to doubt Tamlin when he says that he loves her, because faeries can’t lie. I’ve seen the argument that he was only using her to break his curse, when he made it clear in canon that he wouldn’t use her that way:

Lucien: “By the Cauldron, Tam—there isn’t much time, and you’re just sulking and glowering. You’re not even trying to fake it anymore.“

Tamlin: “It was a mistake from the start. I can’t stomach it, not after what my father did to their kind, to their lands. I won’t follow in his footsteps—won’t be that sort of person. So back off.“

That’s not why I bring this up, though. Amarantha hated humans because of what a human general (Jurian) did to her sister. What if it went deeper than that? What if Clythia thought Jurian actually loved her, and it was a lie? Yes, we know it’s a lie; we’re told that Jurian betrayed Clythia, after all, but it holds a lot more weight if humans are the only ones who can lie.

In popular faerie folklore, faeries are very good at getting what they want, and it never involves lying. Trickery, yes. But not outright lies.

Feyre’s bargain with Amarantha was as close to faerie trickery as we got.

1. Amarantha turned Tamlin’s heart to stone, so technically Feyre didn’t win the Third Trial (”Stab each of these unfortunate souls in the heart”), but that was overlooked in the text.

2. When Feyre “won”, Amarantha claimed there was a loophole in the bargain in that she didn’t specify when she had to free Tamlin from his curse. The text tries to claim that she lied to get her way out of it, but it was technically true. Now, she could have said she didn’t make bargains with human pigs, or that she had lied and what were they going to do about it, she was queen, so there... but she didn’t. Because ACOTAR faeries can lie, so there’s no real weight to Amarantha claiming there was a loophole.

Finally, we get the scene where Amarantha tries to tear Feyre apart for winning, since there’s nothing in the original bargain that says Feyre can live. But Amarantha doesn’t just want to kill Feyre; she wants her to admit that Feyre never loved Tamlin.

“Say that you don’t truly love him,” Amarantha spat, and my body twisted, breaking bit by bit. “Admit to your inconstant heart.”

She doesn’t want Feyre’s love to be true. Maybe it’s just me, but if faeries can’t lie, then Amarantha’s rage here is magnified ten-fold. In her mind, her love for Tamlin is true and Feyre’s is false, because humans can lie and always will. Consider this minor tweak:

“Say that you don’t truly love him,” Amarantha spat, and my body twisted, breaking bit by bit. “Admit to your lying human heart.”

I think it could have been a much stronger story that way, even though I am still fond of it as-is. More than anything else, I wish this story had defined rules and stronger worldbuilding. It’s good, but it could have been so much better.

[maccca-chino]

Fanfiction Q&A

tagged by @thepagemistress , thank youuuuu! <3

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

a whopping 4 can you tell I don't write fics often!

though there actually used to be a few more short oneshots, but when I fell rather violently out of love with SPN, which they were for I just. couldn't stand to see them in there anymore (and I didn't like the writing itself anymore either) and I ended up deleting them... ^^"

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

41,198 (and the deleted fics would only have added around maybe 1000 words? 2k max but I don't even think they added up to that much)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

the only fics left are for DBH now, I have considered writing for Sandman, but tbh. there's sooooo many good writers in this fandom, anything I want to exist as fics is pretty much already there or in progress of being made and so I'm rather content to focus on art, slow at it though I may be :'D

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

er, well since there's only 4 of em:

1. no one can tell where your heart is (885, still in progress. and has been for a while I am so sorry)

2. lay bare the fire in me (328, .....the same as above. but I do have outlines for both fics, they WILL get finished dammit :'D)

3. and I don’t dance, but here I am (87, ...which is the sequel to 1 I couldn't wait to write even though the main fic isn't done yet xD)

4. freedom is a length of rope (34)

also yes, I am indeed very fond of the lower case titles

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I usually do or try to, even if it's just a short answer, because I love engaging with people over things that are important to me (and with comments I don't have to start the conversdation so to speak).

I do however have a few comments left in my inbox that I have not answered due to the crushing guilt of not having updated in so long.

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

freedom is a length of rope (technically also in progress to have a more hopeful ending added, but the longer it exists, the more I want to. keep the angsty ending it has. also guess where that title is from lmao)

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

and I don’t dance, but here I am though the in progress fics will likely end on the same level of everything is good and nothing hurts

8. Do you get hate on fics?

no, people have been very nice and also so infinitely patient with me! TAT

While not hostile, the weirdest I got was someone trying to convince me to let them sort of cowrite the fic with me? I respectfully declined because I did (I do TAT) have the general story outlined.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

...haven't yet, but the two fics in progres will have it. We'll find out h kind then I suppose.

No sure I'd ever be confident enough for pwp.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

I have not and don't know if I would? If I did I'd probably only very loosely do it, because I am not confident I could do each included world/fandom justice. That's easier with art for me than writing.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not to my knowledge, but with barely any existing and only half of em finished I would be surprised :'D

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

I.. don't think so.

13. Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

no, and tbh I'd probably be very intimidated to try.

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

....ohhhhh noooooo, I hate picking favorites :'D

but I think one that's been with me since forEVER is Ace Attorney's Wrightworth (or NaruMitsu as I got to know it hehe).

In newer terms I think Dreamling will stick with me too.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

freedom is a length of rope like I said, the more I think about "fixing" what happened in chapter 1 in an additional chapter, the more I find myself leanign towards "no. this works better as an angsty oneshot"

maybe one day.

16. What are your writing strengths?

hmmm, not sure I write enough to really find em. minimalism? Shorter stories in a more minimal style I'd say.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

hilariously, I think that's also minimalism. because writing longer overarcing storylines when this is your go to becomes difficult.

Or maybe that's just "long interesting storylines that aren't super predictable or cliché"

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic.

well, I am German, so if the opportunity presented itself for a character where it works I could.

as far as writing in general in English goes. idk, I spent a lot of my time conversing and writing in English even outside the internet, and it's hard for me to judge how well lI'm doing in terms of er. written eloquence? I try my best and that's all I can do really.

For languages I don't know, I'd probably try to find someone who knows them or make really sure I've got it correct, I don't trust google translate enough :'D

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Supernatural

unless we count the NaruMitsu proposal RP I wrote with a friend in ICQ, but that was never published outside that chatroom xD

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

no one can tell where your heart is

as far behind as I am with updating it and as much as I feel like I bit off a bit more than I should've with it, it's my baby ;w;

Offering this up for anyone who feels so inclined to answer and tagging @wizardofgoodfortune , @wordsinhaled and @academicblorbo but no pressure! <3

[br1ghtestlight]

20 questions for fic writers

1. How many works do you have on Ao3

23

2. What’s your total word count?

109,996

3. What fandoms do you write for?

bob's burgers, inanimate insanity and there's like one steven universe fic in there. i have written for other fandoms in the past but not on that account lol (and mostly unpublished)

4. Top 5 fics by kudos

zeke running away fic, genderfluid gene fic, louise hat fic, bob mom fic, tinimmy week fic (the problem with naming all my fanfics after really long complicated song lyrics is that i simply will not actually call the fanfictions by their Actual Name. also not linking them bcuz im lazy)

5. Do you respond to comments?

i always try to respond to comments but tbh people dont comment on my work very often?? i also dont reply to comments on my old account bcuz i dont have access to it anymore

6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

i dont know if ive ever written anything angsty tbh?? thats not really my favorite thing because it makes me too sad. out of my published fanfics probably the fic about bob's mom wins by default and out of my unpublished wips uhh maybe my louise and tina focused fanfic. it has a happy ending (maybe) but its a real downer at times. or maybe my tinimmy fic is bittersweet depending on how you read it

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

maybe my fanfic where bob gets a garden LMAO or my genderfluid gene fic

8. Do you get hate on fics?

no!!! actually a secret about me in that my almost 10 years posting art fanfics etc online i have never gotten a single negative comment on anything ive made. i feel very lucky :)

9. Do you write smut?

never have and never will (nothing wrong with it in most contexts but im asexual and smut is extremely Not My Thing. i actually tried writing a smut fic once to challenge myself a few years ago and spent like 1000 words describing the way the candles were lit in their bedroom before i realized its simply not for me and thats fine)

10. Do you write crossovers?

no but if my hyperfixations ever gave me an opportunity to crossover maybe?? any bob's burgers character on the infinity train would be hilarious. any hfjone character would be heartbreaking

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

i dont remember but im gonna go with probably not

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

nope

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

NO I THINK IT WOULD BE REALLY FUN but im too much of a perfectionist w/ my writing and i would be worried about dragging the other person down with me. maybe if my ocd ever gets medicated idk

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

it depends on my mood but right now i have been thinking abt tina and jimmy jr a lot. not even romantically their relationship is just so interesting. jimmy jr/zeke/tina is also great. marshall lee and gary.... bryce and liam??

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you will?

i have like over 30+ wips so thats probably a lot of them FJDMDMSJSKS something i would love to finish at some point but probably never will is a fanfic about how bob and linda overcame the cycle of abuse with their own childhood memories vs how they are with their kids. maybe i could write that with somebody else and we each do like a chapter at a time (they write linda's memories and i write bob's etc)

16. What are your writing strengths?

people always tell me that im really good at capturing character's voices and personalities and making them feel in character?? i always want my stories to feel like something that could actually happen in-universe and make it make sense with the characters etc. i think part of this comes from working w/ my own ocs and thinking so hard about how different people express and communicate things and then applying that to other characters is easy. and bcuz of how my autism works i can memorize how a person or character constructs sentences and create new sentences inside my head in their voice :D i really pay attention to peoples speaking patterns & how they phrase things

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

probably how perfectionist i am about grammar and using certain words phrases punctuation etc that it takes FOREVER to get anything done. i also think im too wordy. i can turn a fifteen word sentence into a fifty word sentence easily which is great for essays but kinda annoying when you're reading a silly bobs burgers fanfic

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language?

i dont mind doing it for my ocs but to my knowledge none of the bob's burgers characters speak another language as their native language?? so i cant see it coming up in anything i write

19. First fandom you wrote for?

i dont really wanna say bcuz its embarrassing and i was pretty young LMAO but it was like youtuber fanfic on wattpad (wayy before whatever youtubers you're thinking of they were never famous)

20. Favorite fic you’ve ever written?

hmm either my tinimmy week fic or my genderfluid gene fic it changes depending on the day. right now its my tinimmy week fanfic <3

[writingdotcoffee]

#249: Finish More Things

And we’re past the 6-month mark. Now 2023 is closer than 2021. Have you started on the projects you want to get done this year? Have you finished them already? How is it going?

For me, 2022 has been the slowest year in maybe a decade. Often, I found it hard to focus enough to make meaningful progress. The next six months will be pretty busy if I want to hit my goals for the year.

I’m not too worried, though. Goals are just goals. Sometimes you hit them. Sometimes you miss. Sometimes the goals you set aren’t worth completing anymore.

What is a good goal anyway? Not in the management sense. Sure, specific and measurable goals are great, but that’s the easy part. How do you find a goal that’s worth working towards? How do you know that you’re working on the right story?

Well, you don’t. Nobody knows for sure. Even bestselling, traditionally published authors miss the mark sometimes.

Grand plans are great, but they aren’t really worth very much. Instead of getting hung up on that, I want to focus on a single goal for the rest of this year: finishing things.

Because I don’t have as much time as I thought I’d have, I’ll be focusing on smaller projects that I can finish rather than more ambitious ones that will bog me down because I don’t have enough time to see them through.

I’d rather finish 10 short stories than write 10 chapters in a book. You learn significantly more by taking something all the way over the finish line. When it comes to art, finishing more things almost always pays off.

Will you be a better photographer if you do 5 photoshoots or 50? Will you be a better poet if you finish 5 or 50 poems? Will you be a better artist if you finish 5 or 50 illustrations? Will you be a better songwriter if you finish 5 or 50 songs? Will you be a better writer if you finish 5 or 50 stories? You get the idea...

Some argue that if you work on 50 stories, you will spend less time on each, and they will be of lower quality than if you focused on five stories. That is, unfortunately, wrong. Creativity adds up. You grow as a writer with every finished story. Any proficient artist will do a better sketch in a minute than a beginner would in 3 hours. That applies to writing too.

Taking forever to write each story will prevent you from acquiring the experience needed to become proficient. It’s a vicious cycle.

When in doubt, finish more stories! There’s still plenty of time left in 2022.

About the Author

Hi, I’m Radek 👋. I’m a writer, software engineer and the founder of Writing Analytics — an editor and writing tracker designed to help you beat writer’s block and create a sustainable writing routine.

I publish a post like this every week. Want to know when the next one comes out? Sign up for my email list below to get it right in your inbox.

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Past Editions

#248: Serious Procrastination, June 2022

#247: Learning How to Fail, June 2022

#246: Your Art Is Like a Journal Entry, May 2022

#245: Writing + Headspace, May 2022

#244: Making a Mess, May 2022

[thelightofthebane]

(right from the start you would be) My Light in The Dark

Pairing: Malec

Rating: M

Summary: What if Magnus couldn’t forgive Alec for breaking his heart after the deal with Asmodeus? What if Magnus left New York and never looked back? What if Clary never got her memories back? What if the parabatai duo was so broken for their lost loves, they couldn’t function anymore? What if broken hearts led to broken souls? What if one left and the other disappeared? What if Magnus came back to a New York where Alec Lightwood vanished a century ago? What if What if What if

Or, Second chances might take longer. But they always seem to find their way back to each other.

This fic was created for the Shadowhunters Reverse Bang 2022: Presented by the @malecdiscordserver

Art by the lovely @hopesilverheart

Chapter 1 - I’ll never worry about letting you break my heart (I'll break my own)

||| Then |||

“I’m not the first person he’s loved, and I won’t be the last. Breaking up is gonna hurt like hell, but it’s the kind of hurt he can recover from.”

“But what about you? Can you recover?”

Alec couldn’t.

Magnus’ heartbreak was stamped under his eyelids – a permanent reminder of his choice, of his sacrifice.

Two broken hearts for magic and immortality.

Did they even have the same value?

Alec didn’t think broken pieces could be worth something, but then again, his dealer was a Prince of Hell. Alec’s misery might’ve been a banquet for Asmodeus. Perhaps he would feed on it for the remainder of Alec’s days.

Oddly, it was a fitting punishment.

Because Alec destroyed the most beautiful thing in his life.

Could you be forgiven for hurting the person you loved more than life itself?

Numbly, Alec felt that the Angels didn’t care.

You’re a warrior, not a lover.

Your hand should kill and destroy, not touch tenderly.

Kill the demons.

Destroy himself.

Maybe do both while you’re at it. Alicante was falling in fire and ashes and blood all around him. Would it be a mercy to die while protecting his city? He wouldn’t care. But if he was going to die fighting, at least he wanted to give his siblings a chance to flee and live.

“We got this,” Alec stated with more conviction than he really felt. He notched five arrows and aimed at the swarm of flying demons coming to his and Izzy’s direction.

“We got this?” His sister looked at him like he had gone crazy already, but didn’t protest further. She readied her whip, already dreading the outcome.

However, before the demons could get any closer, all of them exploded in a big cloud of ash, flames and ichor.

It was brief, but Alec could see the red sparks floating in the air before blinking out of existence.

Magic.

Magic, although destructive, still lingering with familiarity.

“I’m sorry I’m late.”

And if the magic wasn’t already a dead giveaway, that voice sealed the deal. Alec’s entire body tensed, and he had to muster all his self-control to not flinch.

Turning around, he had to swallow hard – both words and tears.

Because his boyf– no, ex-boyfriend was there.

Magic and power circling him like a cloak.

“Traffic was hell.” He joked, but it fell flat on his ears. There was no humor there. Magnus’ voice was indifferent, almost detached, and he barely deigned throw a single glance to Alec’s direction.

Alec wanted to say a lot of things.

I’m sorry.

Forgive me.

I lied.

I love you.

Are you okay?

Are you happy?

Do you feel whole again?

You shouldn’t be here.

Asmodeus… If Asmodeus finds out, he will take your magic back.

Get out of here.

It’s dangerous.

Protect yourself.

Stay.

Go.

I love you.

I love you.

Please, Magnus.

Believe me.

But he stayed quiet. Which was a good thing, as he only then realized Magnus wasn’t alone.

There wasn’t a better word to describe what he was seeing than ‘army’. A whole army of Downworlders marching into Alicante – warlocks, vampires, werewolves, seelies. And despite each faction having their own leader, there wasn’t a shadow of doubt as to who the highest in ranking there was. The one they were all looking to in expectation.

Automatically, Alec stood straighter, posture rigid yet respectful. Even Isabelle acquiesced, doing the same.

“Magnus,” Catarina called, breaking the wordless, intense eye contact between Alec and Magnus.

“Lead all the healers to the nearest empty building you find. Take any volunteers to build wards around it and to retrieve any fallen.”

Catarina nodded once then turned around, soon being followed by a group of warlocks and other Downworlders.

After shooting one last glare at Alec, Magnus turned to the large army, casting a quick spell to make his voice louder.

“All the warlocks, with me to seal the rift. As for the others, either help the Shadowhunters to kill the demons or take the civilians to a safe place. I will also need coverage for the warlocks sealing the rift.”

“We can help,” Alec offered, but only received a cold glare from Magnus.

“We don’t need your help, Shadowhunter. Instead of wasting my time, why don’t you go help that parabatai of yours to deal with the Morgenstern boy? He is still a threat for my people and the cause of this mess. After all, you like to fix things, don’t you?

Alec’s jaw dropped. That jab… Magnus knew. Somehow, he knew what Alec had done.

Before he could spiral into a hurricane of despair, anxiety and fear for having broken the deal in some way, Izzy took his hand and pulled him away.

“Come, big brother.”

Looking at Magnus one last time – who wasn’t even looking at him anymore, but walking away instead – Alec’s shoulders slumped in defeat and he nodded.

After… He could talk to Magnus after.

And hopefully clear things between them.

Yes, Alec could only pray – to any angel who hadn’t abandoned them yet – that things were going to be alright.

~*~

In the end, even with the four of them – Jace, Clary, Alec and Izzy –, only the redhead was able to take Jonathan down with a new rune given by the Angels. They were all exhausted, mildly hurt (though nothing that an Iratze couldn’t help with) and a mess of blood and dirt, but at least they were victorious. The warlocks were able to close the rift and the Downworlders were already retreating from Alicante. Some of the leaders stayed back to negotiate with what was left of the Clave’s representatives, and Alec was sure Magnus was one of them.

He knew he had to go report to Jia about Jonathan’s demise and check with Underhill for updates about the New York Institute, but he couldn’t. He wouldn’t. Not without talking to Magnus. Alec felt that if he missed the opportunity, it would be the end for good.

He couldn’t afford that. Not again.

Losing Magnus… would break him forever.

Four hours later, Magnus finally left the Gard alongside his fellow Downworlders. He opened a portal so all of them could go back to their respective cities, staying behind until he was the last one to cross it. But before he could take even one step towards it, Alec called his name.

The portal didn’t close, but Magnus didn’t go into it either.

Fortunately, they were alone, the early hours giving them the privacy they so needed.

“I see that you got your powers back, that’s good.” Alec began after the silence stretched for a while.

Magnus didn’t reply for a long moment, and Alec was already expecting to be ignored and be left alone. But then the warlock turned and looked at him as if searching for something.

“Once, I said you would blow up the very ground you stood to make something right. It seems that lying is included in your efforts.”

“What?” Alec said faintly.

“A meeting with the Clave? Really, Alec?”

Alec.

Not Alexander.

Alec.

He never thought he would hate the sound of his nickname so much.

Alec remembered that Halloween night. Magnus asking if he could go to Maryse’s shop too to help with the decoration, a hopeful gleam in his eyes for the first time in many days. And Alec having to refuse because he had a meeting.

That part was true. Though not regarding the other party.

“I know about the deal with my father.”

Alec paled. He opened his mouth to protest, but Magnus lifted a hand to stop him.

“Do not fret. I sent him to limbo. Your deal with him is null and my magic is safe.”

Alec’s shoulders slumped at once in relief.

“Why?” Magnus whispered, his voice broken and defeated. “You had no right to choose for me again. First, asking Lorenzo to take his magic back, then my father. Do you even care about my opinion at all?”

“Magnus, you were so miserable. It felt like you were slipping through my fingers. I thought…” Alec’s voice also broke. “I thought you were already going somewhere I couldn’t follow. And I couldn’t help but wonder if the next time I tried to catch you, it would be too late.”

Magnus clenched his jaw, barely containing his frustration and sorrow.

“I was trying to get better. That night I even decided to stop drinking. I knew how worried you were and I wanted to do better for you, for us.” His hands started shaking and his unglamored eyes were full of tears.

“Magnus, what I said… I don’t… I swear… I still lo–”

“Shut up!”

Around them, streetlamps exploded and glass panels shattered.

“Don’t you dare say those words. Don’t you dare taint what is left of me.”

Alec shook his head hard, using all his willpower to keep the tears from falling.

He wouldn’t break apart there, he wouldn’t.

“I thought you were different, but I was wrong again. Tell me. Tell me how you differ from Camille, because honestly? I can’t see a single difference right now.”

Alec flinched hard.

Stabbing him with a Seraph blade would’ve hurt less.

“You… You’re comparing me to Camille? I didn’t… I never… I–”

“You never cheated on me, yes, but hurting me? You lied, you betrayed me.” Magnus’ voice was harsh.

“I only wanted to make you happy again. I lov–”

“Don’t!” Magnus hissed, his slithered pupils becoming even thinner. “Don’t you dare.”

Alec missed the warmth.

He could take Magnus’ anger, but not that coldness.

The indifference. The hate.

Not again. Not again. Not again.

He knew he deserved it, this time, for going around Magnus’ back, but it hurt nevertheless.

And Magnus’ next words sealed the deal and finished shattering his already broken heart.

“You are no better than Camille.”

A pain like no other burst inside Alec’s chest.

It was even worse than when he had felt his parabatai rune ripping apart by Jace’s brief death months ago.

“Go live your life, Shadowhunter. I hope to never see you again.”

And with finality, Magnus turned and entered the portal – which snapped shut a second later.

Between one moment and the other, Magnus was gone.

Alec’s bow clattered on the asphalt.

His knees soon followed.

Alec didn’t care that they had won. He barely heard the loud cheering of fellow Nephilim celebrating their victory while the first rays of morning shone brightly over Alicante.

“Alec?”

“Big brother?”

Everything hurt.

And a traitorous part of him knew that pain would be a part of him until his last breath.

He felt familiar hands touching his shoulders and arms.

For the first time in his life, he didn’t try to keep the leader persona and hold his feelings in. He didn’t care that other people could see him.

Letting the tears roll down, Alec broke down in his siblings’ arms.

||| Now |||

Magnus’ boots echoed through the large hall, occupied by only another soul beside him. He bowed his head respectfully to the Elder and waited.

His visits to the Spiral Labyrinth had become increasingly frequent lately due to a magical instability – both angelic and demonic – affecting not only the Shadow World in its entirety, but the ley lines in more than one dimension, and Magnus had been appointed as one of the leaders of the Warlock community to aid in the damage control.

When he finally thought he was going to get a day of peaceful rest, he received the summons from one of the High Elders, leaving him no choice but to comply.

“We received a request from one of the Hidden.” The Elder spoke, turning to him slowly. His eyes were pure black, very similar to one of a demon’s, but they held kindness and wisdom in them.

Magnus’ eyes widened slightly. The Hidden were communities of Downwolders scattered around, living peacefully in-between veils of this dimension and others. They were like gatekeepers, helping to keep the connection between time and space, the mortal and immortal. Their localization was a secret, ever-changing, and one could only enter their realm with their permission. The Council of the Spiral Labyrinth kept tabs on them, helping them to hide even from the Seelie Queen and Unseelie King. Shadowhunters didn’t know about them either, so if they ever had any problem with demons, they dealt with them by themselves.

“As you already know, the current instability in your world was caused by the destruction of one of the nine hell realms.”

Magnus nodded. An internal conflict between the Princes of Hell had caused one of the dimensions to collapse into itself. He knew Edom wasn’t far away from the same fate without Asmodeus and Lilith’s still weak state. Small rifts had been opening in all continents, and only the ever-growing alliance between Shadowhunters and Downworlders were keeping the invasion of demons at bay. If even the Hidden were being affected by it, things were more severe than he had thought.

“Three days ago, the Blue Hidden were attacked when a rift opened at their borders.”

Magnus frowned, trying to rack his brain for what he knew about them. Since the Hidden didn’t have names for their different communities, they were classified by colors to facilitate their tracking by the Council. To defend themselves, they either trained their own or hired high-skilled beings to protect them. If Magnus wasn’t mistaken, Blue Hidden had the latter.

“Wasn’t their guardian able to defend them? Or could their warlocks not close the rift?”

The Elder shook his head. “They’ve dealt with that already. The issue therein lies on the gravity of the attack. The rift didn’t bring low level demons as per usual. It was a Greater Demon.”

Magnus blanched. “What?”

“The instability caused one of their veils to almost be ripped apart. A Greater Demon took advantage of that. Fortunately, their guardian was able to kill it, but not without great sacrifice. He seems to be on his deathbed and the people are in panic. Their leaders came personally to request your assistance to heal him.”

“I’m flattered by it, but you know well that healing is not my strongest suit. An experienced healer, Catarina Loss for example, would be of much more help.”

“And yet, they insisted on you. They made it very clear that the only warlock they would grant access to their lands was you.”

“This… doesn’t make sense. Why me?” Though, considering it was an attack by a Greater Demon, perhaps some dark magic still lingered, and a healer wouldn’t be enough. If they thought Magnus was skilled enough to help, why not?

“They are very desperate. They call this guardian of theirs Protector of Light, and they are terrified of losing him. They really believe you are his only chance of surviving.”

Sighing, he nodded.

“Very well. Where do I have to go?”

The Elder waved his hand, making a piece of paper appear. “Come to this city and wait there. Within the next few days, the veil will get thinner there. You will be able to feel the exact spot to open a portal.”

Magnus took the paper, and his face fell immediately.

Of course.

Of all places…

“And while you are there, could you do this old fool a favor?” He waved his hand again and a package appeared. “I need you to deliver this personally to the head of the local Institute. The content is fragile, and I wouldn’t want to fall in the wrong hands.”

“Isn’t this supposed to be a task for their High Warlock?” Magnus forced himself to say, trying to not sound like a whining child.

“Lorenzo asked to delegate this to you since… What did he say again? Ah, that you are very easy with Shadowhunters.”

Magnus gritted his teeth. That asshole.

Plastering the fakest smile he could muster, he hummed.

A century.

It has been a century since he last visited that city. That loft.

A century since he last saw…

“Well, I guess it’s time to go back to New York then.”

~*~

“Nice to meet you, Mr. Bane. I’m Rinoa Goldstairs, Head of the New York Institute.”

Magnus smiled politely, but was already regretting being there. It had taken him two days to muster enough courage to approach the Institute, and at least three hours to knock on its door. If times hadn’t gotten better and relations between Nephilim and Downworlders hadn’t improved, he was sure a bunch of Shadowhunters would have already surrounded him with blades, thinking he was there to attack them.

The worst part was that aside from the Shadowhunters’ behavior, something more friendly and respectful, nothing else was really different. At least, not physically. The walls, the screens, the stained glass, the fucking floor was the same. If that new Head hadn’t changed the damn Head’s office too, Magnus would cry.

He might’ve gotten a bit too distracted by the past threatening to hit him at full force, because he totally lost track of what Ms. Goldstairs was saying.

“…you are a legend, Mr. Bane. Everyone knows about you and the four Shadowhunters that made history here in the New York Institute.”

“Is that what they are calling now?”

“It’s just sad that it didn’t have a happy ending after the Battle of Alicante.”

The Battle of Alicante was how the invasion of demons due to Jonathan Morgenstern’s attack was named in the Shadow World’s history. At least the Nephilim had enough decency to not erase the Downworlders’ contribution to their aid. From what Magnus had heard, it was thanks to some mysterious Shadowhunter who took the position of provisory Inquisitor and made sure that the Downworlders were not only remembered, but also given rightful credit to the salvation of the Nephilim’s capital.

“May I ask you what happened to those four Nephilim you mentioned? I thought this Institute would still be under the Lightwoods’ control considering how long they managed it for before. No offense to you, of course.”

“None taken.” Rinoa smiled, already typing something on the screen. “From what I know, the only Lightwoods still alive live in Idris and they came from the youngest’s lineage, Maxwell Lightwood.” Suddenly, four images popped on the screen.

Clary.

Jace.

Isabelle.

Alec.

Magnus’ heart clenched. Seeing Alec’s photo after a century… In the beginning, he had only felt anger and resentment. Now it was a never-ending sadness. He didn’t want to admit it, but he missed Alec more than he missed any other lover he ever had in his life.

All the photos were from the time Magnus met them – young, full of energy and fire in their eyes.

“Clarissa Adele Fairchild,” she tapped on the redhead’s picture and it transformed into a more recent photo – of a beautiful old lady with bright red hair, ink on her arms and a joyful smile. Though Magnus noticed, there were no runes. “Punished by the angel for the overuse of her gifted runes, lost all her memories of the Shadow World alongside her runes. Passed away thirty-five years ago.”

Another pang in his heart.

Oh Biscuit…

“Jonathan Christopher Herondale and Isabelle Sophia Lightwood,” Rinoa double-clicked and both their pictures also turned into their old selves.

They still had their angelic beauty, wrinkles and all.

And again, no runes.

“Both requested de-runement, later integrating themselves with the mundanes.” Magnus’ eyes widened in pure shock. “Jonathan married Clarissa, and they had kids. Isabelle stayed in a relationship with the vampire Simon Lewis until the end, but no marriage or kids. Jonathan passed away forty-eight years ago, and Isabelle passed away twenty-nine years ago.”

Then, Rinoa moved to tap on Alec’s picture, and Magnus swallowed the lump already forming in his throat.

He didn’t know what he feared more – seeing how Alec also got old, and remembering their fight over Magnus’ immortality, or hearing about Alec’s death, thus remembering the fragility of Shadowhunters’ mortality.

However, what appeared was a big question mark and a sign of error.

Rinoa hummed. “Right, nobody knows.”

“What do you mean nobody knows?” Magnus tried to keep a detached voice, but didn’t know if he did a good job considering how he was feeling almost hysterical now.

“One year after the Battle of Alicante, around the same time that his siblings got de-runed, he disappeared. No body, no angelic signature. No rune or magic could track him.”

Magnus felt his knees go weak, and only centuries of self-control prevented him from breaking down entirely after Rinoa’s last blow.

“Alexander Gideon Lightwood vanished from the face of Earth a century ago now.”

[ihassheepquake]

DC's Stargirl 3.02 "Chapter Two: The Suspects" has aired on the CW, and I'm here to talk about it.

Episode 2 baby!!

A little flashback to begin with, fun. Can we talk about how fancy Gambler's little trailer is? And he's being staked out by Sportsmaster, also fun. Sometimes ex-coworkers just need to beat the shit out of each other. And Sportsmaster definitely came to murder this bitch. I like how we're getting these little gaps filled in. And the Shade has come to play too! Now he could do the kind of damage we saw at the end of last weeks episode. But similarly to Cindy, I don't think he'd do that much damage when he doesn't have to, and I doubt he'd need to with Gambler. I wonder if these flashbacks will become a standard of this season.

I really do believe Cindy. I think they're right to be sus of her, but I don't think she did it. Honestly, I think Starman did it. And I don't believe this is Starman.

Now, what are you up to Cindy? Is she trying to undo what Dragon King did to her?

Something about Tigress trying to fit in is so funny. She joined a rotary club! I can tell I'm going to love this subplot.

Big fan of this interrogation.

If this is the real Starman, he's a massive dick. I don't think I want someone like him as a hero. And he's kind of a shitty influence.

Omg Cameron. It's like he can't even do his art anymore.

Barbara and Paula trying to bake together!!!

"The killer has many names" seriously Thunderbolt? Gods, I love/hate genie logic.

Something about Shade living in Zarick's house still gets me to this day. I miss my boy Joey. But thank you Shade, you've got a good point! Why would he make a big show of it? We know he could get away with it unnoticed, so why wouldn't he if he really did kill Gambler? But he and Sylvester are unnecessarily assholes to each other.

Does Courtney have a stronger connection to the Staff than Sylvester does? She just ripped it out of his hands, and he was holding on tight. When he got it from her, she had a loose grip. And he seemed surprised that she managed to get it.

The biggest hint that this isn't the real Starman, no man would ever have such a profound realization about his own problems! (I only jest [a little]).

At least Shade acknowledges his massive ego. The green in his powers lately, a result of his fight with Jenni last season? She had some black in hers too for a bit if I remember correctly.

"So who else is there?" Someone you haven't met.

Oh shit, Cindy has the laptop!

Before they find out? Before they find out what?? Did they do it???

I suppose all these questions and more will be answered next week on DC's Stargirl 3.03 "Chapter Three: The Blackmail" (???)

[jadiealissia]

Share your WIP snippets!

I am curious what everyone on here is working on! Feel free to reblog with your snippet, or if you're feeling shy, you can DM. I'll read everyone's snippets as long as I don't get thousands or something (which I doubt lol).

I'm currently working on editing Taylaron's Story, so here's a paragraph from the chapter I was working on today:

The early train was indeed empty, so at the very least my effort was not in vain. Though it was a short trip, I couldn’t help but close my eyes. Snippets of dreams ebbed and flowed as I fell in and out of consciousness. First, I dreamt that Elawynn was healthy again, though another problem arose that I couldn’t quite remember when the voice of the announcer snapped me awake. Then, came the nonsensical array of plots about my mum, each separated by a brief wakefulness when the train rocked me out of dreamland. I could only remember two scenarios; her stuck in prison, and her back on Niranni again. Partying again. She didn’t want anything to do with me anymore.

I still have a lot of editing to do for that chapter but at least I'm slowly getting there :) Maybe this passage will be quite different by the time I release it!

Please reblog with/send your snippets! If you don't have writing to share, feel free to share your art or anything else, I'd love to see!

[tubul-taylorsversion]

Our education system is deeply flawed, without a doubt. There are many facets as to why this is is, and why this should be rectified. The one I would like to explore is something that is very close to my heart. I think schools should allow kids to specialise their subjects as they join High School (I speak for India, that is). If schools were about learning new things or topics, or broadening the vast extent of all possible knowledge that could be learned (which is how they should be), then by all means, boards should allow children to do as many subjects as possible (as long as the gain is holistic) but with the advent of standardised testing, mugging up certain subjects that will have no use to us at all in the future as ‘general knowledge’ is pathetic. As a neurodivergent, I’m great at exploring topics that require a deep understanding, history however, shakes me to my core. My mind is STEM orientated, and instead of putting my energy into further advancing my hold in the field, I’m being forced to learn about ancient, dead, narcissistic and misogynistic rulers of the long, lost India. Introducing such topics in grade school is a great idea, philosophy, civics, current politics and economics ARE integral in our day to day lives and should NOT be considered ‘too heavy’ for young kids to take. It stimulates their mind and I think that is the fundamental reason behind human existence. However, when the time comes, and everything rides on a high-school mark sheet and diploma, students should be allowed pick and choose the subjects that they wish to pursue. The illogical and pathetic idea of kids taking on 10 exams, work 50 chapters each is BARBARIC for subjects they despise. For me, Biology, Math, Chemistry and Physics are what will be of use. For someone else, it could be History or Art. The point is, our base of general knowledge should be strong enough for us to venture into specialised fields that we’re interested in for us to be good at it. Schools don’t remain institutions of education anymore, it’s a fight for who can rise to the top and crack a good college. Our marks depend on that. Being forced to study subjects of no particular value in my future is a futile effort of a so-called holistic education the board intends to give us. It’s futile and utterly stupid, it is beyond my understanding how you let children’s brains rot as they cripple under such extreme, unnecessary pressure. Please. Fix this.

[aforrestofstuff]

Chapter 149 Expert Review Time

Hey gamers what’s up time for another CHAPTER 👏 REVIEW 👏

It was looking kinda bleak last time for pretty much everyone so I’m hoping things improved this time around, but it seems Murata and ONE are kinda going through their “I’m going to put my characters through the MOST” phase so… that feels unlikely. But nevertheless… still excited to see my favorite boys.

The 10000th Psychic Sister cover. Murata, I’m begging you. There’s literally like 30 other characters to choose from. I know you like drawing boobs but imma need you to put the pencil down for a minute and take a walk because this just ain’t IT.

“Summer is coming” it is July. Summer has been here for ten years. I’m so fucking hot all the time. Everything has been evaporated out of me and I’m literally a raisin.

The Psychic Sisters covers are just so devoid of life a lot of the time… I wouldn’t mind if it was them fighting or engaging in everyday activities but when they’re posed for the camera and deliberately placed there to look sexy it just sucks all the human out of them. The cover/splash page is a great chance to show characters in a new light!!! It’s mostly set away from the story so you can do whatever you want! Choosing to make 80 fanservice covers is just wasted opportunity for what could be additional character development. It’s gotten to a point where even the smegma-slinging bitchboys on Reddit are complaining about the excessive sexy covers…. When PussySlayer384756 complains that there’s too much tittage being shown, that’s how you KNOW we’ve got a problem. Now, idk how the fan climate is in Japan but I can’t imagine they’re feeling much different over there either.

Also, her anatomy is… janky. Her tit is bigger than her head, her belly is too long, and she’s got like 4 spare ribs. Like, I’m by no means an art expert but it doesn’t take a chef to know the soup is shit, you know what I mean? I feel like page after page of Murata drawing obscene muscle men has made him rusty on what should be (somewhat) normal-looking people.

Darkshine learns what TRUE peak male performance looks like.

You’ve gotta wonder how Darkshine even got to the S-Class to begin with when he pussies out of nearly every single fight… except the one where the opponent was literal water. Everyone says that he just joined the association for additional validation, and I believe it… this boy is not cut out for actual hero-ing. 99% Of the time HE’S the one who needs a hero.

It kinda bothers me how useless he’s been post-Garou fight, especially when we spent like an entire chapter trying to console his ass. I get that’s part of his character and development… but it’s begun to slow things down. We get it. We don’t need to see him be insecure every time a new enemy pops up. One was enough. We would’ve gotten the same effect if he just sat out the entire time post-consolation, because everything that’s happened to him on the surface has been kinda redundant.

Here comes the boooyyy 🎶🎶

Nice callback. I’m glad Metal Bat is finally here. Bitch runs slow as fuck.

It’s nice to see him act on his own agency instead of orders from the hero association. He’s clearly much happier when helping out on his own accord, and has a ton of initiative too. The chapter he got with just he and King meeting up and slingshotting themselves to the fight was really a breath of fresh air from all of the fighting. It’s moments like these where ONE remembers that people like OPM for the characters, and not necessarily the pretty action sequences. I really like this duo. I like Metal Bat. I like it when they’re given time to be themselves and not just vessels for the next fight scene.

I know I said I wanted the heroes to die but Murata I’m begging you please don’t kill the child. You can kill Puri, though. I hate that fucker.

Child Emperor regularly visiting and eating with Bofoi even despite being his lab assistant would be a lot cuter if Bofoi wasn’t the human equivalent to a dog turd. I might’ve overstated that… seems like Bofoi is just using him as an errand boy. The clear lack of respect he has for CE is very indicative of his character and is not necessarily a bad thing plot-wise, but I would still like to beat him with a cane. Additionally, it’s clear that he’s not going to help the heroes here. At least, I don’t think so. His “fuck them kids” attitude seems to be a pretty big pillar in the building of his character and I doubt ONE would jeopardize that just because he’s written himself into a corner. Oh, well. We’ll see.

It’s very sweet that even when near death, CE still thinks of Zombieman. Aaaaghh it’s so GOOD when the characters actually LIKE each other. I know realistically not everyone is gonna be friends but man… it would be a lot cooler if we got more insight on their chemistry. Pleaz have more Metal Bat-and-King-esque chapters. I wanna see how everyone gets along.

Also, the concept of Puri just manifesting drilling powers and carving through solid rock with nothing else but pure strength and determination is so funny. A little convenient, sure, but I really don’t care because it’s actually done well. Their reunion scene is hilarious. More stuff like this pleaz….

I don’t even know what to say about Genos here. Dude, I know you made an oath to protect Tatsumaki or whatever, but there’s no shame in a good bail. You can’t even bail anymore because your damn legs are gone. See, this is what happens when you make promises. The secret to keeping your legs intact is doing the bare minimum. Hope this helps ❤️

He’s making a valiant effort but… I’m afraid he just ain’t gonna do much while roleplaying as a worm. Maybe he’ll make a chrysalis and come out as a butterfly. Wait, that’s caterpillars. Fuck. TATSUMAKI IS A GONER, BRO. WE NEED YOU TO BE THE DEUTERAGONIST!! IF YOU DIE WE LOSE 70% OF MERCH SALES NOOOOOOOO

Local man has a heart attack in front of thousands of little monsters and somehow saves the world, more at 5.

King I’m begging you please get that shit checked out that’s not NORMAL.

Yeah, I like this conclusion. Very tasteful cliffhanger. I mean we know King ain’t gonna do shit but SOMEHOW black sperm is gonna get punted like the little cumstain he is. Can’t wait to see the events that unfold next chapter… it seems like every scene that involves King turns out to be really funny and I’m super looking forward to black sperm seeing Jesus.

Also, a little off-topic but I just really like the way Murata inked his pants. Got a real comic book feel to it. I mean, he’s just really good at drawing clothes overall (save for Fubuki’s body-tight dress that is 100% not how women’s clothing works but I digress). Fucker understands fabric physics like I understand how to make a bomb ass chicken parm. I respect it.

In conclusion, lower everyone’s expectations of you and you might get to keep your arms and legs. This has been Life Lessons from Forrest. You now owe me 50$.