Tumgik
#and i felt like while i owe A LOT to this community and this app it's been eating every deeper thought that i have recently
train-inthedistance · 10 months
Note
U still around..? Miss ur blog. Hope ur OK.
aaaa i can't believe im being missed :'o <3 im so sorry im not online as much anymore, i miss you guys too :( im more or less ok though, ive just noticed that my visiting of this website has been pretty compulsive when im not doing too well tbh, and ive recently decided i need to get out of this ditch that ive been in for the past idk 10 years or so for real and that it requires energy and mental capacity etc that i don't even really have in the first place so ive deleted the app from my phone and only check my account every now and then :'( i hope i'll be more active in the future though.... pls never hesitate to shoot me a msg if you feel like it, as i said, im still online every now and then just to check what's happening lol
lots of love, hope youre doing ok too<3333333
5 notes · View notes
robineer · 8 months
Text
being a queer kid on the interwebs
YouTube was my first exposure to the world of the internet (and I was honestly kinda screwed up from there). I consumed media but never gave back to it- until PopJam, which was recommended to me by a close friend that I still hold dearly to today.
For context, PopJam was an app where users could create and share art/images. Think Tumblr but for kids and you could make art on it.
It basically was my first experience in being a "social media user," where I viewed content of others and made my own. I owe a lot to it for giving me the right words to really understand what the queer community was and exposing me to more diverse content in general considering I rarely saw non-white or non-east-Asian people being featured (I consumed things such as Dinosaur King, Yandere simulator, Glitter Force, and Vocaloid) or the word "gay" was an insult (any other term was basically non-existent).
Weirdly enough, it made me realize that I liked more than one gender and that I didn't really like being what I was assigned to at birth. I realized that a lot of what I was taught before just wasn't it. I felt more like a human after "rewriting" myself. The online anonymity gave me a sense of hope knowing that the people I knew in real life probably wouldn't like me for it but I could definitely find people who would accept me online.
The app has since shut down and I'm left with some friends, some art, and some memories. While I don't really miss it, I can't say that the experience hasn't left a lasting impression on me. I'm still more comfortable in labeling myself against what I was assigned to at birth. I'm still attracted to people that aren't only men.
And I'm still viewing and posting on the internet.
10 notes · View notes
purlturtle · 2 years
Text
Purlturtle's social media handling
This is how I curate my social media - sharing this in the hope to help others!
First, turn off push notifications. Do social media at your pace - meaning, you decide when you open the app or browser tab. Don't let a symbol in your notif bar, or a little red number in your app symbol, dictate your usage. YOU decide.
Then, ignore the algorithm at all costs. Ignore every "for you" page. Ignore trending pages. Ignore "your friends are following X" messages. Again, you decide who and what comes into your timeline. Check if there are third-party apps that will prevent ads etc. in your timeline - that's something I do for Twitter, and it is SO much better for my peace of mind. I see only tweets from people I have decided to follow, and nothing else. I venture into Tumblr's "for you" page only when I'm terminally bored - and frankly, I could probably use that time for better things. Like knitting, or writing, or eating a snack.
Next, unfollow, block and mute liberally. Learn to recognize types of content and types of posts that upset you, and avoid them through unfollowing, muting, or blocking. Let's say news about turtles bother you, upset you, or even trigger you: mute/filter the word "turtle", "turtles", any variation as necessary. Unfollow accounts that post predominantly about turtles. If someone keeps pushing news about turtles on you, block 'em. Even if they do so with the best intentions: if it bothers you, block 'em. You don't owe anyone your ears, your eyes, your compassion. You don't owe anyone any explanations, either. Insensitive comments? Clowning? Insults? Block 'em. Let's say seeing people's go-fund-mes upsets you because much though you'd like to contribute, you can't: mute/filter the buzzwords. It's okay, I promise. The culprit here is not you preserving your mental health, it's a system that forces people to fundraise for their health, safety, shelter etc. Self-protection and self-preservation go first, any day. (I have muted the names of several countries, even, because the news coming from there is so dire, and I can't help, and even just having to constantly scroll by requests for help or donations or "spread the word" upset me. "The world needs to be watching" doesn't mean I have to put my mental health in jeopardy.) Be rigorous. Be ruthless. Protect yourself.
Lastly, leave a site or community entirely if it's not a good place for you. I was on Reddit for quite a while, and the subreddits I was in were generally nice and kind places (r/LGBT, r/momforaminute, that kind of thing). And still they dragged me down too much. So I left. Completely. It wasn't easy, and it felt like giving up - I was trying to do good things there, after all! But there were plenty of other people doing the same thing, and, self-protection and self-preservation go first. Leaving was the right thing for me to do.
A lot of social media is designed to channel your attention to what's most profitable to the owner. Take back the steering wheel, and send your attention only to where you want it. Look up "how to mute a word on Twitter" or "how to block someone on Tumblr" if you don't know how to do these things - all that info is out there!
I love being on social media, I love the friends I've made here. And by employing the above strategies, being on social media is recharging my happiness instead of draining it - and that's how it should be!
13 notes · View notes
Understanding Bring a Trailer Sell-through Rate
I had been constantly certain that she was going to break up with me,” Perry wrote in his book, noting that he felt Roberts was “slumming it” by dating him. נערות ליווי בראשון לציון It felt hypocritical to make a living by imposing features onto others that I went out of the way to avoid for myself. There's one way to find out. After squeezing acceptable answers out of you, the employee would show you the resulting five-minute tape. As you can see, in order to find out whether it suits you, there are no specific criteria for character traits or appearance. And truly fancy places will go all out with hot breakfast offerings and things like sausage, bacon and omelet bars. Some places will add waffles you can top yourself and drinks. So, take a look at the top three dating websites that make online dating cool. While you’re only looking for that one special person, the sheer odds of finding them online go up when use the top Christian dating apps.
Dating is a headache to begin with, but if you understand the city you’re living in, it might make things a little clearer for you when you get in the game. She ended things in June to get back together with her ex. This saying means that things cannot change their innate nature. They often relate to things like handling money, love, work, loss, friendship, status, health and other things that all people are concerned with on a regular basis. One such group is people of Latin heritage. With the popularity of these types of clubs, you can get pretty selective in choosing a group. If you have that foodie nature, you should be able to get most of these, don't you think? Think you know your proverbs? Proverbs are short and snappy sayings that state some kind of broad advice or general truth. Proverbs often come from religious or spiritual teachings, as well. When this is the case, they tend to be nuggets of religious text that are meant to be applied in secular settings. Cleveland Singles takes on a different approach to your standard speed-dating event in which you are placed into a room with several hundred other strangers, and you have three minutes to make a meaningful connection.
This phrase means that eventually everyone will have to make good on what they owe, whether it's in money or favors. This phrase means that if something is working, don't try to change it. This phrase means that using words to solve problems can be more powerful than violence. Beyond the basics of your sport or activity, you shouldn't have to invest too much more money. This one is harder to detect and harder to solve-all you need to do with an individual trying to steal your money is contact support, but this won’t help you if the website was actually created to steal your money. Attempts to improve cultural diversity have echoed a pattern identified in Chapter 4. That chapter showed individual autonomy was among the most central values motivating the design of IndieWeb’s technical architecture, yet certain types of challenges were only met when served by more communal values such as consensus and conformity. After finding (or creating) a singles sports club, there really isn't much more effort involved. Keep reading for lots more information on singles and sports. Email addresses are a piece of sensitive information. If you are an English language lover who has a handle on proverbs, put your knowledge to the test with the world's most proverbial quiz!
They are so ingrained in the English language that many of them have also become cliches. The English language is full of them. If it's a golfing club you're meeting up with, make sure you have a full set of irons and woods. Black, Jackie. "Meeting Your Match: Cracking the Code to Successful Relationships." AuthorHouse. Once you've selected one, you can usually find a nearby organization by simply typing in your ZIP code or geographic location. The source code led to an astounding discovery: included in the same database of formidable bcrypt hashes was a subset of 15.26 million passwords obscured using MD5, a hashing algorithm that was designed for speed and efficiency rather than slowing down crackers. You can narrow down your options by selecting a specific activity of interest, like cycling, running or softball. Which of these male celebs would you like to go on a date with? Should your prospective date accept your invitation, be at your best behavior and make engaging talk over dinner.
1 note · View note
cowboyjen68 · 2 years
Note
Hi Jen.
I am an older lesbian too. 50 to be exact, but I am just coming out of the closet late. I feel kinda lost. I don’t know where I fit in. I don’t have many common interests with women my age. But I feel like young girls will think I’m too old. I also am having a hard time knowing where to meet girls to date . I like older and younger women but just wondering if you could give me any advice.
I was single after 17 year at around 50. The last time I "dated" Planetout.com was a thing. I had to take a "seflie" run it to KMart and wait a week to get the photo back. Then scan it and up load it to the webite to date "on line". Looking back I should have just been single for a while because that was a marriage that wasn't the best for either of us.
But at 50 ish I was back in the dating pool and uninterested in those in my friend group. We had too much history as friends and I felt no chemistry with any of them beyond friendship. It was weird to be single and around my friends. many whom had been coupled off for many years.
I met my last girlfriend on Tumblr and she was by far the best love and most passion I have even felt in this life time. She and I had to break up but I don't think either of us regret the two years of life and love we shared. On "paper" we were nothing alike but when we met in person the chemistry and joy we brought each other was undeniable. We shared many of the same values and loved learning about each others likes and interests.
When dating I think about things like values, do we enjoy the same general activities. For instance we might not like the same music but do we both enjoy going to concerts enough that we can go to what the other likes and enjoy ourselves. Are we both staying in even if we enjoy separate activities when at home?
Age can play a factor beyond interest. Age plays a role in where we are in life, like home ownership, career and kids so it is important to recognize and communicate those goals.
My advice is dating is for getting to figure out who and what you like and dislike. Not every date turns into a relationship or friendship or even a second date and that is OK. Be honest as you date. If 20 minutes in you realize you have no connection or interest you can kindly finish the date but listen to your instinct and be upfront that you it just will not work.
Lesbians are notorious for thinking we have to be nice and give more of our time and effort when we are not feeling anything or even negative feelings towards a woman we went on a date with. We do not owe anyome more time or effort. THAT is literally what dating is for. To see if we like someone. If we don't, no more dates with them. That is the way dating is supposed to work. That is not unkind, in fact it is the nice thing to do, to not waste more of her time and yours.
If after 3 or 4 dates you find that things have run its course it is still perfectly okay to be honest with yourself and her that you don't want to pursue things longer.
There are dating apps but I hear a lot of nightmares about them so proceed with caution. They might be a great option to meet friends or dates just be careful.
The meet up App has some "dating" options or often local events that encourage things like speed dating or friendship building. Facebook regional lesbian/bi women pages can be active and sometimes even feature. "singles saturday " or "meet for coffee Monday" to encourage dating or real life meet up. You can join and sort of just read through posts until you feel comfortable engaging.
Don't discount someone who is "not your type" just out of hand. It never hurts to have coffee and see if you are right or if there is more to them than reads on paper or their dating profile. I know many a lesbians who ended up with a good friend after a failed date and two lesbians know other lesbians to introduce each other too.
And again. women's festivals. If you can get to one you can see so many other lesbians of so many different backgrounds, types and personalities and that can boost your confidence and surround you with a non judgemental space in which to ask questions and share stories/advice about dating.
Best of luck out there.
Oh yeah.. take selfies with the camera slightly above you so no one has to see up your nose. (experience ).
39 notes · View notes
formulatrash · 2 years
Note
you mentioned on the bird app about a tension between teams and fe itself, do you mean like mismanagement or miscommunication or something else worse
I mean, if I don't say something assume it's because it wouldn't be politic for me to say it.
but whatever, it's my last weekend: the championship has had a not-quite-loggerheads situation with teams for nearly two years now. a huge amount of the goodwill and belief in the series came from Alejandro's force of personality and since his departure matters haven't been able to be smoothed over as they were previously.
teams who are still here have stuck through a lot, including very difficult years where there have been huge publicity losses for the championship. to commit to Gen3 and stay here, they rightly think that the championship doesn't exactly owe them but ought to be borderline grateful and generally do a better job of its own tasks.
in publicity terms FE is bafflingly in the toilet currently - even the Gen3 launch barely made waves - and its response seems to be a strange shrug or outright aggression for being questioned. obviously, that's not ideal; there's been a massive amount of staff turnover and hardly anyone is left from the previous era which has also contributed negatively to the situation. I wrote an article about this before but FE desperately needs to acknowledge where it is and rebuild itself but it just seems to be flailing and making very poor choices, which for a young championship is playing russian roulette with your own future.
FE is secure, it will get to Gen3 and maybe that will magically fix things. there are of course lots of things going on. supply chain issues and problems with trying to keep a global championship going during COVID shouldn't be underestimated but it's also true that FE is doing the opposite of helping itself, in communications terms and it's set up a seething sense of mutiny. it isn't just about PR - things like Valencia were flashpoints for a building fight between the championship and the teams where getting stonewalled by the FIA and Formula E management made things worse.
FE has always been something you could believe in. it might have been deranged, punk optimism but something you felt would rakishly get away with it somehow. the bratty little protagonist skating around getting in trouble and pulling off an Eprix while the bailiffs were at the door. it seems to have lost that sense of identity and become something that it is much harder to have faith in or not be cynical about.
at the point where they lost me believing in it they probably should have been more worried, as canaries in mines go.
24 notes · View notes
cloud9in · 3 years
Text
The Half of It - 2 (Poppy x MC)
Summary: Bea, the town’s outcast is recruited by the school jock to win Poppy’s heart. But what happens when she starts falling for her as well?
HIGHLY recommend you read/re-read part 1
No warnings this chapter
Word Count: 2.6k
Chapter 2: How to write a love letter 101
 “In love, one always starts by deceiving oneself...and ends by deceiving others. That is what the world calls romance.”
- Oscar Wilde
I was tasked with what was probably the hardest piece of writing I’ve done in all of my years of highschool, and I wrote eight different versions of the analysis on David vs Goliath my freshman year. That’s besides the point, it wasn’t like any normal research essay. No. For some reason I found that my one and only letter to Poppy would have to be the best thing I ever wrote in the entirety of the universe. Too bad I had to make it sound like it was written by Carter, that big stupid jock. You can guess how severely depressed I became after reading what he had initially written…
 “Dear Poppy, I think you’re really beautiful. Even if you were ugly, I’d want to know you, because you are smart and nice, too. It’s hard to find all those things in one girl. But even if you were only two of those things, I’d be into it. But you’re, like, all three, just to be clear.”
 Bea reads off the paper, turning her head with cringe and confusion at the confident jock sitting next to her. Carter smiles, “She’s all three, like you know all three backs of football. The running back, the fullback-”
 “Thanks for clarifying...:”
 Carter stares awkwardly, waiting for her to continue on. And Bea does, with a big ass sigh.
“...About me. Some people think I’m the cutest one in my family. Those people being my grandma...who’s dead now...Never mind about my dead grandma. All I’m saying is that I like fries. I like dipping them in my milkshake. Is that weird? It’s actually really tasty. Would you like to try that with me sometime?
 CJ, school quarterback.”
 Bea takes a good five minutes to compose herself. Yeah this was definitely gonna be a long week. She lowers the paper slightly and turns to Carter, a puzzled look in her eyes. “So what you’re trying to say is-”
 “I’m in love with her.”
 That confession definitely would have sent her sprawling a few feet back if she hadn’t been sitting. Love? What was love? And why does she despise it now that Carter has mentioned it. 
“...Have you ever spoken to her?”
 “Well...no, I’m not good with words. Besides, would I be here with you if I did talk to her?”
 Bea rolls her eyes and huffs exhaustingly. “Carter, you're not in love. You’re just stubborn.”
 “No I’m not! It’s love, I know it’s love. Love feels different, it doesn’t feel...real. It almost feels impossible. But we indulge in it because of the thrill, the adrenaline of chasing someone mindlessly...and wanting to be present in everything they do. There’s that ‘what if?’, the question that could make or break that love. Even if the ending isn’t what you had hoped for, at least you know how it felt to feel so much joy, so much want.”
 Carter stares up at the ceiling in thought, his eyes seem to be unfocused, staring at nothing and everything. Bea gazes over at him in part shock and part admiration, a smile painting her face. “...Wow.”
 “...Hm, yeah. I heard it in a dating app commercial once.” 
 Bea gasps and smacks Carter repeatedly with the letter in her hand, clearly disappointed. 
 “Wha- Ow!”
 “And here I was thinking you were being original.”
 Bea eventually sits back in her seat, her shoulders slumping as she reads the letter over and over again, trying to make sense of it. That was the problem though, it didn’t make sense, well maybe the fries part did, but the blonde had a lot of work to do. Carter watches her silently until he can’t hold back the lingering question in his head. “...Haven’t you ever felt it? That screwy feeling that love gives you? Poppy makes me feel screwy.”
 Bea continues to read, her eyes glued onto the words that are slightly falling out of the printed lines of the notebook paper. But her mind is fully elsewhere, she heard his question loud and clear. The only thing she could muster was an annoyed “no” in efforts to not become vulnerable.
 He intertwined his hands together, leaning back on the bench. “...Oh I get it, you’ve never been in love have you?”
 Bea’s legs were already one step ahead of her mind as they sprung her out of the seat. She grabs her bag and swats the papers in Carter’s direction, a scoff leaving her lips. “You want a love letter? I’ll give you a love letter!”
 “Yeah but will it be something that makes her fall in love with me and not walk away like you’re doing right now-” Carter’s voice rings out hurriedly yet Bea can’t hear anything except the pounding of her heart getting louder as she stalks out of the church. Love, love, love, what even is it? Will I ever feel it? There is nobody who could make me feel-
 The blonde was cut abruptly out of her thoughts as she crashed into someone, who was most likely on their respective part of the sidewalk. All of the materials in her arms fell to the concrete and Bea rushed to pick them up, “I’m sorry I-”
A familiar blonde set of locks and porcelain skin came into view and she immediately stopped and looked up. Poppy’s eyes were already boring into hers, a look of slight concern, and maybe annoyance? on her face. 
 “...I’m-I’m Bea Hughes…” She could only stutter, all those moments that she pretended to talk to Poppy in her room were definitely not paying off. 
 But maybe it did pay off because a small smile, masked with sparkly pink lip gloss started to form. Poppy bit her lip as her eyes crinkled with amusement, “...Yeah I know. You’ve only been playing my dad’s services on Sunday for, like, four years. He does favour you...even if you are a heathen.” Poppy peers over at the church that Bea had just come out of and raises an eyebrow in curiosity. She picks up a stray book from the ground and grins with an impressed look. “Remains of The Day...Loved it. Mr. Stevens is quite the character.” Okay, so Poppy has great taste in literature, that’s another thing to add to the list that Bea totally doesn’t have stored in the notes app of her phone. Listen, she has to write a love letter to Poppy Min Sinclair, so every piece of information is vital. 
 Poppy hands the book to Bea, their eyes never leaving each other while standing up. Say something Bea. Anything. It’s almost like the strawberry blonde was waiting, hoping, for her to speak . 
 But she said nothing. No, all the insecure blonde could do is stare into Poppy’s eyes, almost as if she wasn’t afraid to turn to stone. 
 The sound of car tires scraping against the pavement caused Poppy to break eye contact before smiling one last time at Bea. “This is me.” Bea watched the shorter girl stroll past her so casually, the complete opposite of what she was feeling in the moment. She didn’t speak until Poppy closed the car door and the driver took off, a frustrated sigh escaping her lips. “I’m Bea Hughes? Really?”
 ***
Bea sat in front of her tv, a pen and notepad in her hand. She couldn’t think of anything to write down. How do you write a love letter, or a confession? This is the one thing she had trouble writing. The tv blasted on with 1987’s “Wings of Desire”. Bea cocked her head to the side when the man started to profess his love. She put her pen to the pad and started writing. 
 Poppy,
 You don’t know me, and truth be told I see that as a good thing. You know that saying, there are plenty of fish in the sea? Well I am not a fisherman, nor do I think you are a fish. Letters are not the form of communication that I would personally prefer, but I am the one writing to you. So no more complaining. I think you are interesting. Like a book I want to read. I’d even read the author’s notes at the end just to get every bit of you. I don’t desire a lot of things, but I long for a wave of love to swell up in me. That’s what makes me so clumsy: the lack of pleasure.
 Yours, 
Carter 
***
Bea pushes down on her pedals, pacing her breath with each turn of the wheels beneath her. The voice of Carter appears as he races behind her, careful not to send her flying last time. Then she’d never write a letter again.  “Bea! She wrote back!”
 The blonde pulled the brakes on her bicycle so hard a wheel might have popped off. She was out of breath but suddenly the reason for it was different. Bea grabs the letter from Carter’s hands and makes haste to read the words she imagined would sit on the paper. 
  Carter,
 I like Wim Wenders too. Wouldn’t have plagiarized him though.
 -Poppy 
“Who’s Wim Wenders and why’d you cheat off of him? Bea I looked up what plagiarism meant.”
 “I didn’t cheat off of him!...Okay maybe I did but this is a good thing!”
 “HOW?”
 “It’s...it’s like a game. She’s challenging us..but in a good way.” Bea nods to Carter but also to herself. There was a response. She didn’t think that Poppy would write back but she did and it has changed Bea’s outlook on everything. She was in, and there was no way it could stop now. 
 “So...are we back in the game?” Carter’s words jumble Bea out of her thoughts and she stutters, “Yep..yes we are.” No you are. “We are definitely back in it.” Nope just you Bea. 
 Bea leaves Carter with an awkward fist bump before peddling away, her mind racing with a million thoughts. But they always seem to close back into one familiar blonde who danced and did everything Bea couldn’t. She sighed, the adrenaline pumping its way out of her lungs. 
 “Game on, Poppy Min Sinclair.”
***
 Bea spent the following days perfecting her next letter to Poppy. This one would be more heartfelt, and less cringe and plagiaristic like her last one. It would come from her and only her...but for Carter of course. The thing is, when Bea started writing again, she didn’t think about the fact that Carter would take credit for everything on the paper, and that he would be the one that develops a *possible* relationship with Poppy. Maybe she didn’t want to think about that part, but the other parts brought just the right amount of serotonin to make her shitty day better. Everything she read, everywhere she went reminded her of the strawberry blonde, and of the unfinished letter. Bea attempted to step into the life of Carter’s and speak like a jock would, without making him seem like something he is not. But that was hard. Because it was her words, her mind. Carter would take that from her, even if it was unintentional. 
 It didn’t help that Carter didn’t want them to be seen together in public. He would slide to the opposite end of the bench in the church when his football buddies would come in. Bea didn’t take it personal. She of course had other things going through her mind. 
 It took 7 days. One week. To finish the second letter, a very short one. Bea wouldn’t describe herself as a perfectionist, but every word that Poppy would read had to be perfect.
Dear Poppy,
 Okay you got me…
 Now that that’s done, let’s start over yeah? I’ll start by saying that I sometimes hide behind other people’s words. For one thing, I know nothing about love. I’m 17 and I’ve lived in Farmsville my whole life. I hang out with my friends, I keep my head down. I’m a simple...guy. Which is to say, if I knew what love was, I would quote myself. But I don’t. I have a question for you, please answer it in any way you want. Are you happy where you are right now?
 -Carter
Bea sat in the church, silently tapping away at the keys of piano, a simple soft melody following the nod of her head. Carter had found her like that but didn’t want to disturb. Except, Poppy wrote back again, so this was big news. They both sat in confession booths as Bea read the letter quietly, her hand gripping the edges a little too harshly. 
Dear Carter,
 You know that it takes eleven muscles to yawn? This is the sort of weird fact I find myself recalling to keep myself from...well yawning. Or showing anything I feel really. And I find myself doing that a lot. So yeah..believe it or not, I turn to other people’s words too. 
 When you’re a pretty girl, and I know it makes me sound conceited, but sometimes I am, but that’s why you’re even writing to me right? I mean my image is what gives me attention, I’ve grown used to that fact. When you’re a pretty girl, people want to give you things. What they really want is to make you like them. Not like them as in, “i like you”, but like them as in, “i am like you.” You may think I’m different, but I’m like a lot of other people. Which makes me kind of no one. It looks like I’ve found my place but I really haven’t. Just a girl who’s lost in the mix. I don’t know why I feel like I can tell you this, but you provide the sort of safety I always craved. You’re interesting Carter, I like you. 
 -Poppy 
Bea read the last sentence more times than she should’ve. Carter watched her silently as she stared into the lines of the paper, maybe hoping that more words would magically appear. The blonde couldn’t describe the feeling in her chest, but it hurt. Physically. 
 “Uh...can I text her now?”
 “Too soon.”
 “No, I'm gonna do it now.”
 Bea felt herself starting to get frustrated, but calmness always overtook any other feeling she had. She was taught to be rational.
 “You do that and she’ll think you’re just like everyone else.” You’re not like anyone else Bea, she needs to know that. 
 Carter lets out a heavy sigh and pulls out his phone. Bea felt a buzz in her pocket and pulled hers out as well. A message pops up alerting Bea of another income of $50 being sent to her. 
***
 Bea slogged through the crowded halls trying to find the exit but before she can walk any further, a firm hand grabs her and pulls her into a familiar classroom. The blonde turns to scowl at the perpetrator which was probably Bradley, but instead she sees bright red lips and black glasses. Ms. Kingsley. But she doesn’t look too happy.
 The older woman holds up a paper which Bea recognizes immediately as her letter to Poppy. How in the world did she get that? 
 “So...this is why half my class is failing their essays?”
 Bea could make a snarky comment back to her, but the sight of the letter sends her thoughts spiraling once again. She lets out a defeated sigh. I mean how did this woman know she’d  written that letter? Ina Kingsley knew everything. “Look...I’ll be reopen for business soon enough.” Bea starts to turn to leave and looks at Kingsley one more time. “I can’t do this for much longer.”
 Bea couldn’t hold in her feelings for much longer as well. But not even Kingsley knew that. She walked out of the classroom with her head down, hoping to avoid eye contact with the one she wanted to see the most. 
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
End Note: Part two is here woah. Thought it would never come. 
Tags: @samanthadalton @somewillwin @clowneryme @baexpoppy @zigxryanz @uselesslesbianfr @aleiramacaii  @thedaft1 @alexlabhont @iamsimpforpoppy @cloakanddaggerthings @straightlikewetspaghetti 
70 notes · View notes
gyucore · 4 years
Text
in the orb
Tumblr media
pairing: trapped soul! beomgyu x reader
tags: fluff, angst if you squint, reincarnation au, supernatural au
word count: 1.8k+
warnings: implications of death, light swearing
— you were cleaning your grandmother's attic when you stumble upon an old glass orb that just happened to talk on its own
Tumblr media
A cloud of dust scatters around the room after you drop the glass orb on a particularly dusty couch. You've lost it. You've definitely lost it. You're quick to cover your face with your sleeve, fighting back the urge to sneeze. The orb sits still on the couch as it should, a sheet of gray still masking its surface.
This was supposed to be an average weekend. Your grandmother had invited you to her house for some quality time together during your break, and you thought you'd offer to help her clean her mess of an attic, to which she was more than happy to accept. And right now, the sweet old lady was tending to her garden downstairs while you were up here, freaking out.
It's said that people often imagined hearing strange noises when frightened and alone. And you were in a dark and creepy attic at an old person's house. This could just be another case of the common I'm-so-lonely-I'm-starting-to-hear-voices scenario. It's simply wasn't possible for a dusty old orb to start talking when you pick it up. It's just not.
“Hello?” You call out, immediately finding yourself silly for even attempting to communicate with an inanimate object.
The dust in the room eventually settles, and yet still no response. “See, Y/N? You were just hearing things.” That conclusion seemed convincing enough. You felt the need to give yourself a good pat on the shoulder for going along with the sane route.
With that dilemma out of the way, your attention couldn't help but wander back to the large piles of junk occupying nearly every space in the vicinity. One could only hope for your grandmother to clean regularly. “Right, now back to work.”
“What work?”
“Oh, you know. Cleaning.” You answer its question from earlier.
You freeze, eyes wide, a chill running down your spine. There it was again. You weren't sure if you heard it right this time or was just hallucinating, but there was one way to find out.
Silence. You almost called it a day after considering that you were probably just tired and needed some rest.
Half a step outside the door and the voice spoke once more. “Are you still there?”
You pause, brows raised, and back still turned. Somehow, you didn't know if it was safe to face the big ball of dust just yet. “What do you mean? Of course I'm still here. This is my Grandma's house.”
Thank the heavens for modern technology and the invention of smartphones. Speaking of which, you fish for yours in the depths of your pants’ pockets. The voice recorder app should come in handy during times like this. You know, to confirm you're not crazy. With the app on, all you needed to do was have the orb talk again.
“Grandma? Oh! Then you're her grandchild?!”
“Uh, yeah?” The orb apparently knew your grandmother. Strangely enough, that was the least odd tidbit of information you obtained today.
“Her grandchild.. Wow, to think I'm finally meeting you! Or at least your voice?” The orb lets out a giggle and the more you heard it talk, the more human it sounded.
“Sorry, can you excuse me for a minute?”
Never in your life had you thought the day would come where you'd be excusing yourself from a conversation with some sort of decorative object but life has its ways. You were never a stranger to off days anyway.
“Oh, sure, uh, go ahead? I can wait.” The orb swiftly replies. For a second, you could swear something was moving from inside the orb after the light outside the window had hit a clear spot in the crystal.
Heavy footsteps echoed in the room as you dash downstairs, taking your phone out and bringing it closer to your ear, replaying the recording. Sure enough, the voice was caught in the audio loud and clear.
“Holy shit. I'm not crazy.” An exasperated sigh leaves you as you slump back on the wall in disbelief. For a moment, you considered running away and warning your grandma about the cursed object, but part of you was curious enough to disregard the warning signs, and possibly risk your life by going back up there and approaching the thing. You decided to go with the latter.
“Are you back?” The orb asks once you've gotten close enough for it to hear your footsteps.
“Yeah. Just had to do something real quick.”
“I see.”
You wait for the orb to continue but it doesn't. It continues to lie on the couch lifelessly as if it hadn't been speaking to you in the past few minutes.
“Um..” You clear your throat, hoping to get another response
“Oh!" The voice from the orb seemed startled after hearing you talk. “How are you're still there?”
You frown. “Why wouldn't I be?”
“Well for starters, a talking glass orb isn't quite the public friendly concept you'd think it'd be.” It answers. Only now have you noticed that the orb had a particularly low masculine voice. “People don't usually stick around long enough to find out why I can talk in the first place.”
You blink. “Fair point. Though, I don't see the need for you to ask over and over again when I already said I was back.”
The orb chuckles. “You'd be surprised how many times people have reassured me of their presence only to leave halfway. Plus, I can't really see you right now to actually know you're there.”
“You can't see me?”
“The dust.”
“OH.” Not knowing what came over you, you immediately lunged forward and started wiping the orb with one of the dust rags you had lying around. It didn't take long for the thing to clear up and look like its old glorious self again. “How about now?” You ask, inspecting the orb as you hold it up.
“Better.”
It takes everything in you to resist dropping the orb on the floor when a glowing face of a man appears from the inside, smiling brightly at you. “I think I'm gonna pass out.”
The man visibly panics, pressing his face closer to the glass. “Wait no! If you pass out now, I won't have anyone to talk to! I haven't spoken to a single person in decades!”
“But you mentioned my grandma earlier, I thought you—”
“She could never hear me, but I could see and hear her.” The man explains, his voice a little quieter than before.
You bring the orb down, still cupping it in your hands. “How is this possible? Are you a ghost or something? How did you get in there?”
“Wouldn't you like to find out?” He winks, resting his head on his hand. “Take a seat and place me down somewhere soft.”
This seemed ridiculous by all means, but you oblige. The couch should be soft enough, and so you place him down gently while you take a seat on the floor, making yourself comfortable. “You were saying?”
“I—” The man accidentally bumps his head onto the glass as he leans forward, chuckling as he rubs his head gently. “Ow. Sorry. I'm just so happy to finally have someone to talk to. You can't imagine how long it's been. How the world survived without a single soul hearing my heavenly voice for all those years is beyond me.” He cracks a joke and you couldn't help but laugh.
“It's okay.” You say, shifting in your spot. “Go ahead.”
The man nods, the smile slowly fading from his face. “My name is Choi Beomgyu. You can call me whatever you like. I had a friend once, and she was a witch. Oh— not the kind that you hear from stories, no. She was really nice and cared a lot about nature, her friends, and her family. That type of person, you know?”
You nod along, assuring him that you were listening, and he smiles again.
There's just something about his smile that just seemed so happy and endearing. Perhaps it had truly been so long.
“She was this ball of sunshine. And back then I was a pretty different guy. Our personalities might've clashed and we butted heads a few times but somehow we ended up becoming close friends.” A faint smile graces his lips before disappearing as quickly as it came. “But then I got involved with the wrong crowd.”
The statement piques your interest and you draw closer. Beomgyu notices this and tries to talk louder.
“Remember how I said she was a witch unlike the ones in the fairy tales? Well, there were also people who were exactly like those witches. The ones that used their knowledge and abilities for their own nefarious purposes.” Beomgyu continues, his hair slightly covering his face as he looked down. “Let's just say that I got myself in a situation where they ended up hunting me down for my soul.”
“What?”
He frowns. “My friend saw me being chased down the streets one night and helped. We both knew that even when together, we were too weak to go against all of them. They had us cornered in her home, and that's when we knew it was the end for us.”
Beomgyu's voice started to waver as he spoke and you were about to ask him if he was alright, and tell him that it was okay if he didn't continue but the look on his face when your eyes met was enough to tell you that he needed to do this. He must've wanted to talk about this matter for so long, you think.
“She.. pushed me towards her workroom, telling me that she'll keep me safe no matter what. I didn't know what she meant until she cast a spell on me and I passed out. The last thing I heard were her screams. I never found out what happened to her after that, and I can only assume the worst.” He shakes his head, trying to getting himself together in front of his new friend. “Next thing I knew, I was inside her old glass orb. I've been trapped in this thing for years with no escape. No one to talk to— forever regretting how I didn't stop her that time, and regretting getting in the way of those witches in the first place.”
His story nearly brings you to tears, and before you knew it, your hands were reaching out for the orb. “Beomgyu, I..”
“It's alright.” Beomgyu smiles. “In the end, the orb ended up in her younger sister's possessions.”
Your eyes widen. “You mean.. Grandma?”
“That's right.” Beomgyu chuckles. “Though she had never able to see or hear me, unlike you.”
“Oh. That's uh, too bad.” You smile awkwardly, releasing the orb. The two of you sit in silence for a while, both needing a little mental break after that.
Shortly, your attention was brought forth back onto the orb when you hear Beomgyu laugh. You find yourself chuckling along. “Entertained are we, Gyu?”
The laughter stops and his eyes shoot up at you. You hear him mumbling something incoherent before hesitating to speak. “No, no.” Beomgyu shakes his head. “It's just.. It's kinda funny. I'm trapped here repenting for my whole life because of what I've done to her, or thinking about what I could've done.. but you know what? To be completely honest, I was starting to forget what she even looked like. But looking at you now, and hearing your voice..”
The idea popped up in your head and you weren't sure if it was even possible to begin with. But then again, you were talking to a soul inside an orb.
“You were easily granted access to the true nature of the orb, and are the first person to have ever done that without running away.” He kids. “Could it be?”
“I wouldn't count on it.” You tell it to him straight, getting up from your spot on the floor and dusting off your jeans. You knew what he was implying and there was no way that you were even considering yourself to be your great aunt's reincarnation no matter how ridiculous the situation already was. “I'll get back to cleaning. Feel free to talk while I do that.” You tell him before rushing to the other side of the attic, avoiding his gaze as much as possible. You'll figure out what to do with him later.
Beomgyu watches you fondly. You had told him to not even count on the thought of you being the one he's been hoping for all these years but it was too late for that now. 
“Entertained are we, Gyu?” Her voice rings in his mind, and he shakes it off.
“How do you always manage to do such amazing things? I'd appreciate it if you'd stop stirring my heart.” Beomgyu's gaze rests upon your busy silhouette, and he smiles in content.
“It's nice meeting you again, Y/N.”
140 notes · View notes
azuries · 4 years
Text
why i abandoned twitter, ig and closed my main form of interaction (asks)
i dont really want to give a long explanation of why ive been so out of it lately, so ill do my best to keep it brief.
my second term in university, which was like..i guess 5-6 months ago, was the most stressed ive been in, ever.
i was struggling with deadlines, i was way behind my classmates, and i didnt feel like i was doing enough when it came to quality with my projects. i also felt like i was on the verge of failing. it felt worse knowing i had a scholarship to maintain and with my parents warning me constantly that it was possible to lose their job due to the pandemic, i basically felt pressured bc i couldnt afford to fail, despite my lack of motivation and mental capacity to exceed. i was also going through some familial issues, along with relationship issues with some people which i am guilty for not controlling well.
the stress basically piled up in one go and i felt trapped.
in my final day for the sem, i was miserable. i felt like i was in the lowest point of my life and i thought of things to do to myself i wouldnt dare imagine doing now. i felt empty and lonely, and i didnt want to talk to anyone. i didnt deserve to talk to anyone. i felt like i wasnt worth spending time with. i could barely look at myself in the mirror.
i took a break from twitter specifically, for a couple of days, probably weeks. i came back for a short while, but i refused to let myself interact with anyone bc of how ashamed i was. i even locked my account so people wouldnt find me anymore. i was in a really bad place and i never felt lonelier, and as a person who's known to be usually vocal with feelings, i repressed what i was thinking to everyone i knew, and that kind of terrified me. instead of fixing it and confronting the problem, ive been running away from it. the guilt just kept piling up for the past months, and i still feel disgusted with myself for ever thinking i was worth their time and lacking communication like a dumbass, knowing that i was a sorry excuse of a human being and how it would hurt even more if they found out how much of a failure i am.
i was gone from my old twitter for god knows how long now. i avoided talking to my friends because i was so afraid of confrontation, and most of them had connections to the person that was affecting me the most. if one dm'd me, id immediately uninstall the app out of fear. i never had the courage to see their message and panic blocked them. it even got so bad to the point a friend of mine who commissioned me had to follow me up on their order, and i wasnt able to deliver after so many months of waiting. i refunded their money and gave them extra as an apology. i havent checked my business email since it was linked to my twitter and it showed notifs of my friends.
this is the main reason i closed asks and messages. i didnt want to be found, and i was afraid id run into them. if im being honest, i dont think im gonna be fully back anytime soon. im still figuring out my feelings and its still up for debate if im ever planning to talk to them again. i owe them an apology for being gone for so long without at least an explanation, but i feel like its too late for me to say anything, considering how long its been. they probably hate me right now, and honestly they have every right to. i also dont want to blame that person, since they tried their best to make it up to me after what they did, but i simply could not have forgotten how much it hurt no matter how hard i tried. ig that also plays a major factor in why i couldnt talk to my friends since theyre connected to that person as well.
so all in all, yes ive been strayed away from it for a while. even though the pain and guilt is there, i dont think i wasted my time sulking. ive been focusing on my schoolwork a lot more, ive (mostly) repaired the relationship with my parents, and i finally found the courage to reopen commissions again as a way to swear to myself to never leave anyone hanging like that again. i feel a lot more lonely tbh, but at least much more productive. things that happened made me focus on the things i wouldnt have prioritized if i didnt spend most of my time online.
it doesnt mean i regret i met them though. not one bit. spending time with them made my life less of a living hell and i will forever be thankful for the laughs and love they gave me. i feel guilty that i wasnt able to give them the same amount.
if you guys ever read this, im so sorry im too much of a coward to confront you guys myself. i just wish the best for all of you and i hope youre all staying safe and taking care of yourselves. maybe ill come back, maybe i wont. but just know, i truly am sorry for leaving so suddenly, and in better circumstances we can hopefully be reacquainted when we're all in a better place mentally.
thank you for reading, and if you reached the end of this message, congratulations you saw my oversharing 👈👈
18 notes · View notes
homeformyheart · 4 years
Text
first choice (part 2) - noah harris x mc (mtfl)
author’s note: part 2 for “first choice.” there are mentions of characters from the freshman series (emily day, zig ortega, chris powell) – enjoy!
copyright: all characters owned by pixelberry studios. moodboard created by me. series/pairing: my two first loves - noah harris x mc (emma price) rating/warnings: 18+; smut between the 🔥⚡ and ❄💧 icons word count: 4.9k based on/prompt: moodboard aesthetic / prom theme inspired by the royal masquerade choices book. summary: emma and noah’s relationship continues to blossom and hit a few major milestones as they finish out their senior year of high school.
read part 1 if you haven’t. read the follow-up fic, the perfect gift if you’d like.
Tumblr media
first choice (part 2)
2 weeks later
emma blew on her gloved hands to try to warm them up. she was wearing at least three layers, a scarf, boots, and she still felt the freezing cold in her bones. noah looked over at his shivering girlfriend and chuckled, putting his arm around her and rubbing her shoulders.
“how are you not cold?” emma whined, turning her body toward him to get as close to his body heat as possible.
“i’m always warm and it’s technically above freezing,” noah said, bending down to kiss her forehead.
berry high and eastridge had a partnership with a local community program that helped coordinate and fund group college visits. emma had volunteered to help coordinate schedules across schools. it took a little bit of convincing, and promising a lot of kisses, but noah agreed to come on the trip. even though the NAUA scholarship didn’t pan out, emma was hoping that hartfeld’s second chance scholarship might still be an option for him.
“we’ll take a 15-minute break everyone, feel free to grab some coffee!” the tour guide announced as they approached the campus coffee shop.
“oh, thank god!” emma muttered, half-dragging noah with her as she raced to stand in line.
“hot chocolate or coffee?” noah asked, wrapping his arms around her waist once they got in line.
they approached the front as emma still debated her order. “vanilla latte, please!” she said, kissing him on the cheek before going to find a table.
she sat down next to the red-headed tour guide. “hey emily, how easy is it to find flexible part-time jobs on campus? my boyfriend’s a little worried about balancing everything.”
emily smiled. “first of all, you guys are such a cute couple. second, it’s pretty easy to find a job on campus or close to campus. but how to balance it all might be a better question for my boyfriend, zig, who took a full course load while playing football and working to support his family. i’ll see if he can take his break now.”
emily walked to the counter as noah came back with their drinks. emma accepted the warm mug gratefully and sighed as the latte warmed her cold fingers. noah slid in next to her on the couch, putting an arm around her shoulders.
the tall, tanned brunette barista sauntered over with emily, who quickly introduced everyone. emma shook zig’s hand and was surprised that he and noah went in for a fist bump.
“have you guys met?” emily asked, also seeming surprised.
zig nodded. “i helped prep noah for his interview with dean stafford for the second chance scholarship.”
emma’s eyes widened with recognition. “oh, you’re the one chris mentioned when i spoke to him about the scholarship!”
“chris powell? yeah, he’s one of our best friends and team captain. he showed me your film, noah, and we made sure to pass it on to coach with our recommendations. it was a no brainer, especially hearing about your story from emma,” zig said warmly as emily cuddled in close to his side.
emma tensed and looked down. a couple of weeks ago, the hartfeld football coach reached out to noah “out of the blue” and recommended he apply to hartfeld formally. that noah would be a top candidate for the second chance scholarship, so long as he was willing to play football for hartfeld and kept his grades up. the captain of the team then reached out and walked noah through the application process and connected him with zig to prep for the interviews, which not-so-coincidentally aligned with the trip’s scheduled visit to hartfeld. of course, all of that happened after emma found chris’ contact information on the scholarship website and spoke to him about noah.
zig kept talking about how the scholarship changed his life and made it so he could finally pursue the college education he wanted and was able to put the stigma of his past behind him. noah asked zig if he could have a moment alone with him. emma bit her lip nervously as she walked away with emily to give them some privacy.
“is everything okay?” emily asked.
“um, well, he may or may not be mad at me for going behind his back and submitting his football film to chris. i came across the second chance scholarship during my research and thought it would be perfect for noah. i didn’t tell him about it because i didn’t want to get his hopes up,” emma said quickly, a knot of anxiety forming in her stomach.
“well, it sounds to me like he’s very lucky to have someone in his life who cares so much about him and his future. zig and chris also wouldn’t be here if someone didn’t give them a second chance. it inspired chris to create the scholarship, and i really hope things work out for you guys,” emily said reassuringly as zig and noah fist bumped. she walked over to give zig a kiss and emma watched apprehensively as noah approached her, his face thoughtful.
“i’m sorry for going behind your back, babe. you were just so upset about losing the NAUA scholarship, i didn’t want to get your hopes up but i did a lot of research and thought the second chance scholarship would be perfect, since it covers tuition, room and board, and books, with football and boxing fulfilling the activity requirement, so any extra money you make can be sent to your mom. i had to convince ava to help me sneak into the A/V office, and i owe michael a big favor since he put the highlight reel together quickly to make the deadline, so i didn’t have time to explain, and…” emma blurted out. “are you mad?”
noah gave her such a tender look that the tension in her body disappeared. “how could i be mad at my gorgeous, selfless girlfriend who found a way that i could go to college while dealing with her own applications? but i don’t like that you felt as though you needed to keep this a secret. i want us to be a team, okay?”
emma tilted her head up and leaned in to give him a soft kiss. “okay. and i couldn’t just not help you. i care about you, babe. you mean a lot to me.”
noah lowered his head until his forehead was touching hers and closed his eyes. “what did i do to deserve you?”
she laughed. “you chose me, remember?”
“and you chose me,” noah said softly, leaving a kiss on her nose and lacing his fingers with hers as they left the coffee shop to rejoin the tour.
4 weeks later
emma was in front of her house at 7am, waiting for mason. she had texted him a few days ago asking if she could join him for a run. she was pleasantly surprised when he replied but she still wasn’t sure what to expect. she looked carefully at mason’s face as he jogged up to her house, trying to gauge his mood. he gave her a nod and she fell into place jogging beside him. when they finally reached the park and took a break, emma turned to face mason.
“thanks for hanging out with me again, i’ve missed you,” she said, her voice hopeful.
mason gave her a longing look before a small smile appeared on his face. “i’ve missed you too, em. i wish things could go back to normal with us, but i don’t think my feelings for you are going to go away anytime soon. and it hurts to think about you with noah.”
“i felt the same when you were with ava and i’m sorry if i hurt you. mason, you’ll always have a special place in my heart but i also really want my best friend back. i think we just maybe outgrew the old way we used to be friends with all the changes that happened this year, and with us going to different colleges and experiencing different things, maybe we just need to find a new way to be there for each other,” emma said slowly. she had given this a lot of thought over the last couple of months.
mason nodded thoughtfully, seeming to agree. “yeah, maybe we can talk over a milkshake?”
they spent the rest of the morning sharing a malted peanut butter milkshake and catching up on everything and anything. as the sun rose high in the sky, they decided to order food and continue talking like they used to, and emma was hopeful that they would be able to keep finding moments like this to reconnect even when school and life kept them miles apart.
* * * * * emma kept hitting the refresh button on her phone mail app for the results of the photo contest she was expecting to hear about. she was sitting in the park with noah, who was attempting to study for midterms but kept looking over at emma with amusement.
“staring at your phone isn’t going to make the results appear magically,” he teased.
emma put her phone down and sighed. “i know, i’m just really anxious.”
“come here,” noah said, putting his book aside and pulling emma on to his lap. he wrapped one arm around her waist and used the other to draw her face closer to his. he left a line of kisses starting at her neck, working his way across her jaw, and up to her cheek. emma closed her eyes, tilting her chin toward noah so their lips could meet in a sweet kiss. she brought a hand up to the back of his neck and shifted so she could deepen the kiss when she heard the ping! from her phone. she quickly climbed off noah’s lap to grab her phone and read the new email that had arrived.
“oh my god, i won! i can’t believe it!” emma shoved her phone in front of her boyfriend’s face, who quickly scanned the congratulatory email and broke out into a wide grin.
he stood up, pulling emma up with him so he could wrap his arms around her and swing her around. “congratulations, babe. i knew you could do it! remember what i said when we picked that one?” noah asked, setting her back down on the ground and peppering her face with kisses.
after an hour of reading her write-ups for both photo options and looking at each photo carefully, noah grabbed the first one and handed it back to emma. “you should use this one. your write-up definitely brings the viewer into the moment and make it seem like so much more happened than the moment itself. and personally, it means the most to me since i was thinking of you when i scored that touchdown. i was so happy you were finally mine, the adrenaline made me feel like i could do anything,” he said, smiling fondly.
“how could i forget? i made sure to include it in my college applications because of that,” emma said, smiling.
6 weeks later
emma smoothed out the invisible wrinkles in her navy fit-and-flare dress outside of the neighborhood restaurant noah first took her to when he asked her to homecoming. it quickly became a fixture for them as a date night spot, but tonight was going to be the first time she met his mom and sister. to say she was nervous was a huge understatement.
noah took her hand and gave it a squeeze. “there’s no need to be nervous, i promise,” he said gently, giving her a kiss on the cheek before leading her toward a booth in the back of the restaurant.
emma waved shyly as they approached the booth. “hi, mrs. harris; hazel. it’s really nice to meet you,” she greeted tentatively. she was surprised when mrs. harris stepped out of the booth and wrapped her up in a big hug.
“it’s so good to finally meet you, dear. i’m so glad you could join us to celebrate!”
the rest of the evening was pleasant as they recounted how noah got selected for the second chance scholarship. emma and noah held hands under the table throughout dinner, giving each other side glances and small smiles when they thought his family wouldn’t notice. noah looked pointedly in the other direction when they started sharing embarrassing childhood stories, and emma just laughed along until the conversation eventually transitioned to emma’s future.
“so, emma, what are your college plans?” mrs. harris asked.
she saw noah shift in his seat and avoid her gaze. she hadn’t made any decisions yet but they also hadn’t really talked about their relationship long-term.
“um, well, i plan on focusing on fine arts so i’m deciding between the california institute of design and columbia university in new york,” she replied quietly.
mrs. harris clapped her hands. “oh my, those sound prestigious! i’m sure your family would want you to stay close.”
emma smiled half-heartedly and nodded. “yeah, california would be much closer to home.” but on the complete opposite side of the country from hartfeld, she thought glumly to herself.
dinner wrapped up shortly and after saying goodbye and promising to have dinner with them again soon, emma sat quietly in the drivers’ seat of her used SUV. her dad finally caved and bought her a car as an 18th birthday and congratulatory present after her acceptances came in. it was a safe, reliable car, perfect for the eventual long drives to and from college but emma was just glad to finally have a car of her own. emma looked over at noah with a twinge of sadness as she drove silently back to his house, stopping a couple blocks away so they could have some privacy.
“we should probably talk about what’s next for us, right?” she asked hesitantly.
noah shrugged. “we still have time before you have to decide. but honestly emma, i want you to make the decision that’s best for you. promise me you won’t factor me or our relationship into your decision.”
emma looked helplessly at how the moonlight seemed to sharpen the contours of noah’s face in the most romantic way; his eyes shining sincerely with every word he said. how could this kind, sensitive, gorgeous guy not factor into her decision? she sighed and nodded, “i’ll try.”
🔥⚡🔥⚡
he gave her a sympathetic but understanding look before taking off his seatbelt and reaching toward her. emma obliged, turning the engine off and climbing over the center console to straddle his lap. noah lowered his seat back, wrapping one arm around emma’s waist and the other around her neck, bringing her in for a kiss. emma sighed contentedly at the soft, sweet kisses that quickly grew heated. she ground her hips into his, trying to get her body as close to his as possible, as her hands tangled themselves in his hair. she moaned as he started kissing down her neck to suck gently on the soft patch of skin near her collarbone, one hand moving to palm her breast and the other trailing up the inside of her thigh.
they had agreed over winter break to go slow and that sex would be off the table for now, but that didn’t mean they couldn’t still have fun. emma was starting to get addicted to his touch and wanted to speed up her readiness for him even though logically she knew they needed to take their time; noah had more experience from his time in juvie but understood more than she did that he needed to go slow with her. they ended up meeting somewhere in the middle. emma let out a soft hiss as his fingers started stroking the fabric of her underwear and she ached to feel him inside. he pulled back to look in her eyes for permission and when she nodded, her lips swollen and eyes lidded, his finger dove underneath the fabric.
she could sense the smirk on noah’s face before it appeared as her hips started grinding against his fingers of their own accord and crashed her lips into his. he quickly added a second finger and emma moaned against his mouth; she wanted more. as his fingers continued their steady strokes, she unzipped his jeans as fast as she could, cupping him in her hands through the fabric of his underwear before diving her hand beneath his waistband. she felt him stiffen even more once she freed his cock from his pants and started stroking him; knowing that she caused this reaction sent a thrill down her spine.
“noah, please, i need more,” emma whimpered, rocking hard against his hand while trying to match him stroke for stroke.
“since you asked so nicely,” he murmured against her lips, pressing his thumb down on her clit and moving it in slow circles while maintaining his finger ministrations.
emma buried her face in his neck as she felt the pressure build below her hips; her body felt like it was on fire and she came apart shortly after, biting down gently on the patch of skin that connected noah’s neck to his shoulder to keep herself from screaming. panting slightly, she pulled back to look at him as he brought his fingers to his lips and began licking them. emma picked up the pace of her strokes and gave him a mischievous grin, leaning forward to capture one of his fingers in her mouth, tasting herself. noah’s eyes widened with surprise and she felt his cock twitch underneath her hand as she swirled her tongue around his finger. she moved back to lower her head to his cock.
he tried to pull her back up. “you don’t have to do that—” but she waved him off.
“just tell me what you want,” she winked, continuing her strokes as she started licking him playfully.
noah’s hips rose slightly. “you’re not going to have to do much, i’m close, babe. just keep doing— that, yes, god!” true to his word, after a few measured tongue swirls in sync with her hand strokes, emma felt noah clench and release but not without moaning her name. she swallowed as much as she could and grabbed a tissue from the center console to clean up the rest, grinning wickedly at noah.
“you are definitely full of surprises,” he murmured, bringing her up so he could give her a kiss.
❄💧❄💧
8 weeks later
emma stood in front of the refreshments table, trying to avoid constantly looking over to see if anyone was looking at her photos. but of course, she couldn’t help it and was glancing over every 15 seconds. she stopped when a pair of large, warm hands covered her eyes.
“guess who?”
she squealed and turned around to wrap her arms around noah’s neck. he had to take a step back to keep from falling over, and let his arms wrap naturally around her back. he leaned down to give her a quick kiss before she pulled away.
“thanks for coming, babe. let me walk you through it,” she said excitedly, grabbing his hand and whirling around quickly to lead him toward the wall where her photographs were on display at berry high’s end-of-year art show.
noah smiled and listened attentively as emma explained the themes she was going for and why she chose each photo and placed it where she did. he glanced over at the photos as she was explaining, but he cared more about observing the way her eyes lit up as she talked about something particularly moving, the way she tapped her chin when she was gathering her thoughts, or when a light pink blush appeared on her cheeks when she glanced over and caught him looking at her.
it wasn’t long before her family, ava, mason, and berry high friends arrived and she moved to greet them, giving them a similar rundown of her photos. noah took a couple steps back to observe the photos from a distance; he wasn’t that into art but could tell that emma had a real talent. of course, someone might say he was biased since her award-winning photo, which happened to feature him, was front-and-center.
“hey noah, how’s it going?” noah turned to his right to find mason standing next to him, looking up at emma’s photos.
“jennings. i’m good.” he really wasn’t one for small talk. “i’m glad you made it; emma’s been looking forward to seeing your reaction since you’ve always supported her photography hobby.”
mason turned to him, eyebrow raised. “thanks, i appreciate that. she used to always carry her mom’s camera with her everywhere.” he paused and noah, who always found a way to extract himself from conversations when the predictable lull approached, took a sip of his drink.
“i know we’ve had our differences but i just wanted to thank you for being there for emma. she means a lot to me, and she seems happy with you. just don’t hurt her,” mason said, putting a hand on noah’s shoulder as he turned away.
noah held mason’s gaze for a brief moment and nodded. mason gave him a nod in return and walked away. noah wasn’t sure if they would ever be friends, but he knew mason was always going to be in emma’s life, and at least now the two of them had an understanding.
the crowd was starting to thin out as the evening wore on, and soon it was just him and emma. he put an arm around her waist and brought her closer. “i’m really proud of you. your photos are amazing,” he said, leaning down to give her a soft kiss on the forehead. emma felt herself flush from the compliment.
“wait, i have one more thing i want to show you,” she ducked below the refreshments table to pull out a horizontal picture frame. she tucked it behind her back. “turn around and close your eyes!”
noah chuckled but obeyed; even though he was tempted to peek, he preferred seeing emma’s eager expression when she was waiting for his reaction to something. “okay, you can open them now!”
where her photos were before now hung a series of five photos, individually framed, but connected in a large horizontal design. noah stepped closer to look at the photos, there was the goofy one of them from homecoming, the selfie they took under the stars after emma agreed to be his girlfriend, and a few others. he looked over at emma, who looked giddy, prompting his eyebrow to quirk up in interest.
emma leaned forward to flip a switch hidden on the side. it was then that noah noticed a cord from the frame that was plugged in to the outlet below. when he looked back up, a soft light came from each individual photo, lighting up the letters P R O M ? in script.
noah stood there with his jaw open slightly, stunned. “wha-? aren’t i supposed to ask you to prom?”
emma shifted her weight nervously. “well, i wasn’t sure if you wanted to go to eastridge prom and since i’m at berry high, i figured i should do the asking. and i wanted to surprise you since, you know…” she trailed off and noah raised his eyebrow at her expectantly. emma blushed and looked down at her feet. “you said before that you liked that i could surprise you. i just want to make sure i keep you interested.”
he wrapped his arms around her to pull her in for a kiss. “you just keep being you, there’s plenty to like.”
“wait, is that a yes?” emma pulled back to look up at him.
noah just chuckled. “like i could ever say no to you.”
* * * * * emma couldn’t have imagined a more magical night, as stereotypical and cliché as that sounded. berry high had outdone itself with their prom theme, “the royal masquerade,” and the sparkly gold and silver décor. she couldn’t keep the smile off her face as she took in the balloon archway and the gold and silver painted vase centerpieces filled with red and yellow roses on each table. masks and crowns surrounded the vases, along with disposable cameras and costume jewelry, easily serving double duty as décor and photo props.
she turned her head to look at her absolutely handsome boyfriend. he wore a fitted black suit and bowtie with a boutonniere that matched the deep red of her dress and corsage. even though they had coordinated their outfits, she was still stunned when he came to pick her up. she had forgotten how good he looked in a suit. she kept sneaking glances at his profile the entire ride over (he drove them in her car after she made it clear she was not going to ruin her hair and makeup by riding on his motorcycle to prom), wondering how she got so lucky with noah.
“you’ve been staring at me all night, you okay?” he asked, holding out his arm for her as they stepped through the doors of the ballroom.
emma looped her hand in the crook of his elbow, hoping he didn’t notice how she lingered on his bicep. “you just look so handsome tonight,” she said, sighing happily.
noah smirked. “i think you’re the one who steals the show. you are absolutely gorgeous tonight, baby. dance with me?” he grabbed her hand and extended his arm, inviting her to twirl under it. emma giggled as she let him spin her around, the long skirt of her dress billowing out elegantly, before he put his arm around her waist and led her to the dance floor.
after taking their prom photos, dancing with her berry high friends, and enjoying the evening overall, noah quietly led emma toward one of the ballroom balconies. they stepped outside and let the night breeze cool them down.
“did you want to take a break?” emma asked, feeling grateful that she could lean against the railing and take some of the pressure off her stilettos.
noah didn’t answer but just looked at her softly as he rested his arms on the railing on either side of her, enveloping her in his arms. “i just wanted a little bit of quiet to admire my amazing girlfriend. i can’t believe we’ve been together six months already. it seems like not that long ago that we were dancing at homecoming.”
emma felt herself blush. “you are being really romantic tonight, you know that?” she said softly, placing her hand on his cheek and gently stroking it with her thumb. noah leaned down until their foreheads touched and emma felt an overwhelming warmth bloom from her heart and spread across her chest. in that moment, wrapped up in the tender way noah was holding her, she couldn’t help but feel safe and loved. she knew her feelings had progressed for a while now but wasn’t sure if she should wait for noah to say it first. her heart told her that she needed to seize this moment.
“i love you.”
noah’s eyes widened slightly. did she just say—? he blinked a couple times before a wide grin broke out on his face, his eyes lighting up with happiness. “you mean it?” emma nodded, smiling shyly. “i love you too. i’ve wanted to say it for a while now but you beat me to it,” he said, cupping her face in his hands and leaning down to give her a deep, loving kiss.
emma beamed and knew she was never going to forget this night for the rest of her life.
* * * * * summer came and went, filled with graduations (lots of tears all around as noah walked across the stage, with mrs. harris squeezing emma’s hand tightly) and grad parties, working part-time to have spending money for college, registering for classes, and planning out the road trip to school. but emma’s favorite part of the summer was how she finally got to spend it hanging out with ava at the mall like old times, reminiscing with mason at his treehouse or at the beach, helping mack find ways to express her art more productively, and going on lots of dates with noah. despite the memories she made that more than made up for missing out last summer, emma was ready to step forward into her future.
noah secured his motorcycle to the tow dolly attached to the back of emma’s car as she crammed in another box in the backseat. “that’s the last box, right?”
emma nodded, glad her dad got her a car that was big enough for both of their stuff but small enough that she shouldn’t have issues finding parking in the city. she watched as noah went back into the house to say his goodbyes and sent her dad a quick text update that they were getting on the road. their goodbye earlier that morning had been brief; he wasn’t thrilled that she was driving cross-country with noah, but agreed to trust her as long as she sent him updates every couple of hours and called him once she arrived at their scheduled stops.
she climbed into the car and put on her seatbelt, waving goodbye to noah’s mom who was waiting in the doorway. noah gave his mom a kiss on the cheek and climbed into the passenger seat. emma turned the key in the ignition and looked over at noah. “ready?”
“wait, not yet.” he leaned over and cupped her face in his hands before giving her a long, deep kiss. “i love you. now i’m ready.”
emma rolled her eyes but couldn’t keep the grin off her face. “i love you, too.”
she carefully pulled the car out of the driveway, following her phone’s gps toward the highway. she couldn’t help but glance over at noah’s profile next to her, wondering how she got so lucky. noah held out his hand and emma laced her fingers with his over the center console. he pulled their intertwined hands together to leave a soft kiss on the back of her hand, and when he looked back up at her, he was beaming. emma felt a feeling of gratitude and love swell within her for this wonderful man who chose her first.
* * * * * mentions: @khoicesbyk; @nyastarlight; @chetachisblog​; @robintora​;​ @shows-simp-card​; @brycesgirl​;
12 notes · View notes
dbizzy1989 · 5 years
Text
This is my first foray into fan fiction. I’ve been obsessed with Buddie lately and the cookie scene in 3x11 pushed me over the edge. I hope whomever reads this finds it entertaining. Enjoy!
P.s. I wrote this in my notes app and copied it into tumblr, so forgive the formatting errors such as no indentations at the beginning of each paragraph and the line spacing is atrocious. I promise I will do better:)
The party had just ended and Eddie said his goodbyes to the guests. Chris had fallen asleep earlier, Buck put him to bed like he’s done many nights before. He looked around at the mess the guests had left and made quick work of cleaning up. In the kitchen the sound of Buck tidying up could be heard. When the living room was back to normal, Eddie made his way into the kitchen to lend Buck a hand.
The sound of footsteps alerted Buck to Eddie’s presence in the kitchen. “I got this Eddie, just go relax!” Buck exclaimed, turning his head to meet Eddie’s gaze.
“I don’t mind helping, it is my house after all.” Replied Eddie. Buck answered without a word, his exuberant smile said it all. As he went back to washing the dishes, Buck could feel Eddie fall into place next to him. The two fell into their usual rhythm: Buck washed and Eddie dried. It was like this whenever Buck was there. Whenever Buck was there, domestic duties just seemed more easy. For the first time in a long time, Eddie felt he had a partner.
Eddie was alone for so long that it took a while to get used to having someone next to him. Then after a while, he had forgotten what it was like to be alone. Buck, never having someone next to him was used to flying solo. He never knew what he was missing until he met Eddie. They were more than best friends at this point. Sure, they could manage on their own but would much rather share their space together. Just Buck, Eddie and Chris, who was just as much Buck’s as he was Eddie’s. The three created a cohesive family unit that both men had been craving for some time.
As they stood there at the sink, Buck would wash a dish then Eddie would take it from his hand to dry. Eddie wasn’t sure how to describe it but each time their hands touched, he felt something come alive inside. He felt more at peace and more like this was where Buck belonged. Where they both belonged. Quite simply put, this was home. Buck Right by his side just as he was in every aspect of his life. Before they knew it, they were finished with the dishes.
“Teamwork makes the dream work!” Exuded Buck. Hand raised in the air waiting patiently for a high five. Eddie couldn’t help but roll his eyes and let out a shy smile, raising his hand to meet Buck’s. Leaning back against the sink, Eddie took notice of the pack of unopened cookies on the counter.
“Who brought these? They’re my favorite!” Eddie exclaimed as he tore open the package.
“I did.” Buck replied. “Maddie basically guilt tripped me into bringing them. She said that it was rude to not bring something when you’re invited to someone’s house.”
“If that were the case, then you owe me a lot of cookies Buck.” Eddie grinned as he said this, a mouthful of cookie crumbs scattering on the floor.
“Come on Eddie! I just swept up the floor! Talk about rude.” Buck teased. He reached for the broom and so did Eddie. For a brief moment, their hands met. Eddie quickly pulled the broom from Bucks hand and got to sweeping.
“It’s my mess, I’ll get it. How about you just head home, it’s getting late anyway Buck. You helped enough today, go home and get some sleep.”
It was in that moment that Buck’s underlying sadness reared it’s head. What was home for him anyway? An empty apartment and an empty bed is all it was for him anymore. Right now his apartment felt more like a hotel than a home. This place felt more like a home than any place he’s ever lived. To go to his apartment was something he didn’t want to do anymore. He wanted to experience life with Eddie and Chris and Eddie’s house was where he needed to be.
“Yeah...um, I guess I should. If that’s what you want me to do. It is getting kind of late.” Buck replied, the statement sounded more forlorn then he intended it to be. Eddie seemed to pick up on Buck’s emotions.
“I don’t want you to go, you’re always welcome here Buck! I just figured that maybe you needed some space. Not that I don’t enjoy your company but you gotta be sick of my mug at this point!” Eddie joked.
“The only thing I’m sick of is having to go back to an empty apartment. There’s no life there Eddie. Here is where I need to be.” As he said this, Buck looked to the floor. He didn’t want Eddie to see the sadness in his eyes. He didn’t want to have Eddie feel sorry for him. He just wanted to speak his truth. A moment of silence fell between the two men. As he stood there collecting his thoughts, Buck could hear those familiar footsteps closing the gap between them. Next, the warmth of Eddie’s hands cradled his face.
“Buck, you are welcome here anytime. There’s nobody I want in my life and Chris’ more than you. I could never repay you for what you have done for us. And if I’m being honest, you make this house a home for us.” Eddies hands had made their way down to Buck’s. For a moment they stood there together not saying a word yet saying everything left unspoken the past few months. “You and Chris are the reason I get up in the morning. For a while it was just me and him but you stepped into my world without hesitation. Chris loves you so much and I do too. Maybe it’s time we dive into this and see where it goes.”
Buck leaned into Eddie with hesitation. He wanted so desperately to kiss him in that moment. He needed it to confirm what he always knew. Yet he was scared of what that might entail. Would they make it together or would it unravel the tight bond they had worked so hard to create? They were a team in and out of work and Buck didn’t want to lose that. He couldn’t lose that.
Before he could pull away, Eddie softly pressed his lips to Bucks. The nervous tension melted away and Buck quickly leaned in too. But as fast as it happened, their kiss was over. Neither of them knew where to go next. This was new territory for the duo. Neither of them uttered a word, they could communicate without them. Instead, Eddie took Bucks anxious hand and led him out of the kitchen. They settled on the couch for a while, just the two of them. No worries, no cares. Just two men finally acknowledging the love they shared for one another.
“You definitely belong here Evan.” Eddie whispered to the curled up man beside him. “There is no doubt about that.”
123 notes · View notes
l0chn3ss · 4 years
Text
l0chn3ss update
I feel like the last time I ever really active on tumblr was in the year 2016, so i want to address my absence between 2017-2020. Part of it is because I feel like I owe it to my friends and mutuals who I just basically left on read and another part is because I’ve always treated this blog as a personal blog that documents my life and my growth. I put off writing this for a long time but now that I have a huge paper due, now is definitely the time.
You are welcome to skip but I will address a few hard hitting questions I feel should be answered, especially since I feel like I departed like an anti-hero of a bad tv show.
Where I am currently: I am in grad school to obtain a master’s in library and information science. I have a full time job at different middle school libraries, though I work from home now. I also tutor kids on the side to pay for my tuition because I basically make minimum wage. Quarantine messed with my head at first, but now I’m feeling much better and I’m trying to reconnect with friends and close a lot of loose ends.
TLDR: I took an extended break because tumblr mobile sucks and my laptop needed serious repairs. I made a huge migration away from social media in 2018. I prioritized my education and in-person connections, which fell to shit because of my fandom involvement in the past. I did not like the direction of the main fandom I participated in and knew that many of the people I once respected did not respect me in return/ Us versus them mentality. I recognized that I treated my life on tumblr too seriously and took petty drama personally. I am sporadically on tumblr now because I genuinely enjoy the social connection and because I still like running fandom events.
Yes, you can reblog this. I’d love for this narrative to be heard.
Long version: To preface this, this post is being written to give myself closure and because I really am procrastinating on my final big paper of this semester. I’ll be tackling on the points in the tldr in a longer narrative that will appear to be in an expository fashion, which I recognize will be a source of contention, but my intentions are to throw it onto the table so that I can be freed. I can let it go and move on. I’m no longer a 20 years old who cared too much of what other people think and will think; I think differing perspectives are important and I want to give myself a chance to say my piece. That and I recognize that I lost the audience that I once had, so I doubt this will be an issue at all. It’s been 4 or what ever years, let’s just not.
Back in 2015-2016 there was a huge back and forth between three groups of people in the SE fandom. The reason why I’m not listing out the name is because I don’t want this to show up in the tags. I’d say that the three groups could be seen as quite literally the soma shippers (mostly white, demi sexual girls), lgbt centric bloggers (very kid or star oriented, very fed up with soma), and the people who were deemed as alright to soma shippers (c r ona, ste inm arie, jac k im centric people). There was a constant (and understandable) tension between the first two groups while the third was like the weird cousin that everyone in the social circles liked because they sprinkled in soma for the masses. Don’t argue with me on this-- this was literally how the fandom was in 2015 and you know it.
The main issue was that one group felt that they were being inclusive towards identities and sexualities while the other felt that they were not. I remember that one of the arguments was that soma WAS an LGBT ship because people headcanonned the members to be demisexual. However, the other side of the argument was that it wasn’t good representation of a gay pairing. Now that we can look back at this 5 years later, I have two things to say: 1, I now very much understand why the argument broke out because of how heated the topic is, and I do believe that I lean more towards the “other side” now that I’m not wearing rose tinted glasses, but 2, I need to make it clear that demi people are lgbt, but a headcanon is not fact and ship diversity was the main question at hand, not the ship itself. This argument lasted for weeks, destroyed my friendships, and no matter what I felt I did in the moment (which was to mend the fandom), it was taken as an insult.
(Side note: Somethings that I remember was being in someone’s DM’s to encourage them to participate in the large fandom events more, but once they twisted my intentions and rallied their friends, I became their enemy. I also became the mods’ enemy but then again, when was I not? I was made fun of for saying “queergender,” a term that is now currently being widely used, quite openly by someone I wanted desperately to be friends with. I was outwardly mocked by popular users who only apologized behind closed doors but didn’t bother to clear things up with their followers. Adults who were in their 30s quite literally attacked a 19 year old. It was in that moment that I realized I would never become friends with either side, and not because I didn’t want to.)
I bring this up because as I begun to stop writing soma fics, I also begun to see and understand why people moved away from it. It wasn’t the ship itself, it was the culture surrounding it. However, on tumblr we have the ability to connect intensely with the content we produce. Therefore, the ship itself began to be connected with the shippers and their attitudes towards outside pairings-- that attitude being tied into elitism.
I say this with every ounce of love I can because I once had the exact same mannerism. When you become so tied into one pairing to the point where other ships appear to threaten the existence of it and you react negatively towards it, you become rancid. The popular tag “everything is soma” takes a very dark turn. Even if readers consume another pairing’s work, they will be obliged to say “I ship soma more BUT that was cute.” They will read an entirely different topic and wonder why soma wasn’t inserted into it in the background. They will reject pairings that separate the two as if breaking them up is sin and an insult.
The only reason why I stopped writing my soma fics in 2016 was because I saw a real need to fill in the gaps of other pairings. I took what people were saying to heart and I wanted to change my ways and my perceptions. I saw the animosity of the ship culture and rejected it. I wanted to use what little influence I had to make the fandom just a bit more accepting. In 2016, I don’t think the fandom was ready for it. In 2017, they still weren’t ready for it. In 2020, I see hope, but I wonder sometimes if it’s masqueraded pity because of previous treatment.
In the middle of it all, I went from being the soma angst master to becoming the weird person everyone once knew. I was the friend that people excluded from group chats and I just “wasn’t the same.” Cliques grew extremely large in power in 2017 and exclusion hurt like a bitch.
The straw that broke the camel’s back and completely shut me down was in 2017 when I was graduating as a bachelor. There was a fandom event that I decided to go all in to. For context, there used to be a huge debate on how many times a person should enter in an event, but in my mind, the more exposure the better. My graduation and the event took place at the exact same time, which was cool, but what hurt me was what happened after.
I was lucky enough to be accepted into field school (when you travel to do outdoor excavating) for my major. I’m an anthropologist-- it was an honor. I didn’t plan in advance for it, and if anything, I thought that I would be committed completely to the events and my 5 or what ever entries at the time. I’ve always prided myself in communicating with others, so I made sure to let my partners in the event know what was going on. I was so excited to be going on my first ever excavation and no one at the time said anything otherwise, in fact, they all seemed incredibly supportive. 
What I didn’t know was that I would be called out by name in the event feedback response by one person who felt that I didn’t take the event seriously enough and that I should’ve prioritized my time accordingly. Two of the mods let me know because it referred to me directly, though the name of the submitter was not included. It was not only a slap in the face, but a dumbfound moment that reminded me that wow, fandom content really is someone’s life out there. My enforced silence because of lack of internet in the woods actually upset someone and made them believe that I wronged them, because I put my real life ambitions first before a fandom event.
It was then when I woke up and I remember very clearly thinking to myself: I don’t want to be like them. I don’t want to treat my fandom life seriously. I want to participate in fandom for fun, not out of duty. I don’t want to prioritize this life because in the end, if I am hated for putting my work and education first, then I don’t want it.
(For context, I suspect that it was the same person who made a 200 note call out on me during the fandom tension. I respected this person immensely, but I also treated them like the flawed person I believe everyone is. I’m sure because of this, I’m pretty much trash in their eyes, which is totally fine. They have really cute cats so they can’t be all too bad. Don’t look into it too deeply.)
Once my month long field school was up, I was already used to not being on the internet or any of my social media accounts. I didn’t play my mobile games for a month. I didn’t read the news for a month. It was like going cold turkey on the internet, which reshaped my habits entirely. The only time that I had online within that time span was during the weekend, but I spent my time working on my projects and catching up with friends instead of being on apps.
I was also completely fed up with tumblr’s mobile app at the time, so one by one, I deleted my apps. Good bye to tumblr, snapchat, what little I used of instagram, twitter, everything. The only thing I kept was facebook, which was because it is the main platform that I use to message my boyfriend. That meant that any friends I retained from the fandom (who I still contact now) were also friends who had the chance to add me on facebook.
This was the cause of my 2 or 3 year hiatus on tumblr, and therefore the fandom. I occasionally checked back every 6 months to do a few fandom events, but I have several unopened messages and notifications that I haven’t been able to get to. I open my instagram for a few days once a year, and I only go onto twitter if my friends tell me (through facebook) that they dm’d me a post there.
When I left my online persona behind, I quickly strengthened my in person connections. New drama that erupted every other day became replaced with starbucks and boba runs. Reality TV shows replaced fanfiction. Text messages replaced the tumblr activity feed (which still doesn’t work on mobile BTW). I study at cafes unironically with friends instead of typing alone in my room. Overall, it opened my world considerably.
I still like making fun of myself and I try not to take myself seriously. I still make self depreciative memes to send to friends but then double up with kermit heart pics. I’m still a plot bunny, I still write my fics, I still watch my anime, I still play video games, I still sleep at 4am, I still take my depression medication, I still love potatoes, I still use my voice for people who can’t find theirs yet. But I think I’m in a much healthier mindset now, even if I still make stupid shifty posts calling out bad behavior.
Nowadays, I’m working on my Master’s degree in secret. My parents don’t know about it because my mom doesn’t like that I want to go out and do unladylike things like getting an education. I tutor kiddos and I’m really good with younger children, but I’m not going to do anything with kids because I just don’t want to. Instead, I want to work at an archive or a museum to bring my library interests and my anthropology background together. If I had my dream job, I would be a marine archaeologist; however I love my boyfriend of 8 years whom you probably all remember and I really came to terms with my grandeur dreams. I’m extremely happy with living in a small town with loved ones now, and I don’t need to move somewhere far away from my parents to be content. It’s a huge realization.
From 2018 to 2020 I got into actual drama in person while I was job hunting. Adult people suck and honestly it’s kind of embarrassing how ill equipped some people are. Even so, I currently work in middle schools as a media assistant. One of those realms is the library, and honestly it’s like fulfilling a prophecy. As much as I love the social aspect, public schools are an absolute train wreck.
I’m going to wrap this up now. This post is meant to help me close the past and move forward because the fandom culture feels different now. Things from several years ago don’t need to resurface. I want to enjoy my life fully, and fandom life is one of those aspects that I truly did enjoy. I’m going to keep using my voice and act like a fool, but I’m also not going to be losing sleep because of this. People are going to talk about you no matter what, whether positively or negatively, and it’s important to not take it personally.
Idk, go enjoy yourselves. Do things for yourself. It’s more fun that way.
68 notes · View notes
gumnut-logic · 4 years
Text
We’ll Be Home For Christmas 4.5
Tumblr media
Title: We’ll be home for Christmas
Day Four – Five Billionaires and No Wives – Part 5 Prologue | 1.1 | 1.2 | 2.1 | 2.2 | 2.3 | 3.1 | 3.2 | 3.3 | 3.4 | 3.5 | 4.1 | 4.2 | 4.3 | 4.4 | 4.5
Author: Gumnut
29 Apr - 11 May 2020
Fandom: Thunderbirds Are Go 2015/ Thunderbirds TOS
Rating: Teen
Summary: The boys can’t fly home for Christmas, so they have to find another way.
Word count: 4259
Spoilers & warnings: language and so, so much fluff. Science!Gordon. Artist!Virgil, Minor various ships, mostly background. A little angst in this one.
Timeline: Christmas Season 3, I have also kinda ignored the main storyline of Season 3. The boys needed a break, so I gave them one. Post season 3B, before Season 3C cos I started this fic before we saw it.
Author’s note: For @scattergraph​​​. This is my 2019 TAG Secret Santa fic :D
I’ve been staring at this too long and it is late. I hope I don’t regret posting this. Especially as Alan misbehaved and threw an unplanned scene at me.
Many thanks to @i-am-chidorixblossom​ @scribbles97​​​ and @onereyofstarlight​​​ for reading through various bits, fielding my many wibblies, and for all their wonderful support.
Disclaimer: Mine? You’ve got to be kidding. Money? Don’t have any, don’t bother.
-o-o-o-
He didn’t sleep long.
Virgil was woken so they could drag him onto A Little Lightning. Scott marshalled him out of his wet clothes, into a shower and quietly redressed his healing incisions. Lunch was demanded and a sandwich shoved into his hand. Coffee was denied him and orange juice substituted.
He found himself dozing at the table.
Mel and Sam were invited for lunch aboard the boat. Gordon was busy being host, but never quite seemed to be very far from Virgil.
Sam mentioned the whales several times, but Gordon shut him down and at no point did he have a chance to corner Virgil.
Virgil felt sorry for the cetacean biologist. He must remember to talk to him at a later time. Once he had finished processing today himself.
The whole experience was otherworldly. He didn’t quite know how to express it. It was as if the music had shape and form, his mind’s eye producing a kaleidoscope of imagery sculpted by sound.
And it meant something.
He knew it meant something, but he couldn’t decipher most of it. Bits were missing, the shapes fragmented, but he did feel the emotion that travelled with it. Multidimensional, the song communicated in a way he wasn’t capable of fully comprehending.
“Virgil, you should go to bed.”
Scott again.
“Mmm-hmm.”
“C’mon.” A hand landed gently on his shoulder.
“Mmm...” Musical shapes danced in his mind and he realised there was colour. Greens, violets and yellows. Patches torn from an unseen spectrum. It was frustrating to not be able to pull it all into focus and understanding.
“Virgil?”
It would be interesting to try and paint. Yes, maybe that would be a way to understand it better. He visualised forming those shapes with pencil and brush. Three dimensions...no four. They shifted according to time.
Hell. So confusing.
But he could try.
“Virgil? You with me?”
Huh? He blinked and looked up at concerned blue eyes.
A sigh. “Just thinking.”
“I can see that. You need rest.”
He did, yes, but he also needed to think, to doodle, to work it all out. He caught Scott’s eyes. “Sit with me?”
A blink. “Of course.”
There followed farewells, Virgil pre-occupied throughout. At some point Mel kissed him on the cheek, but he barely registered it. Sam said something but was interrupted by Gordon. Virgil felt completely spaced and somewhere at the back of his thoughts he was embarrassed at his lack of response and manners.
Scott didn’t leave his side.
Gordon made excuses and apologies.
John was speaking to Eos...which meant their guests must have left. Man, he was out of it. Brain overload.
Alan had concerned blue eyes so much like their eldest brother.
The yacht’s engine starting up scared the living shit out of him. It shattered his mindscape with aural static, those careful shapes disintegrating.
“Hey, hey, Virgil. It’s okay.” Scott had his hand on his arm again.
Virgil’s heart was thudding in his chest. A blink. A calming breath. A moment. He forced calm. “I’m good.”
He was, really. He just had a lot to think about.
“You sure you don’t want to sleep?”
“I’m sure.” But there was something he did want to do. “Come up front with me?”
Scott frowned at him.
“I just want to feel the sun on my face, the wind in my hair.” And get as far away from the engine as possible.
“Sure.” A pause. “But you’re sitting down.”
“Sure.” Virgil pushed himself to his feet.
They found a niche on the bow, enough to sit comfortably with some back support. They could see Gordon frowning at them from the cockpit.
Virgil caught the thought and had to stop himself from laughing out loud. Apparently, he was as much a flyboy as his big brother.
The boat was moving at a reasonable speed, Gordon, no doubt, wanting to get home fast due to the day’s events. That and now they were behind schedule and had quite a long, final stretch to make it before sunset.
Raoul was little more than a smudge on the horizon already. Virgil stared at it a moment before turning and facing the wide ocean ahead of them that ultimately would contain their island. Wind streamed through his hair.
“It will be good to be home.”
Scott didn’t hesitate. “Definitely.”
Virgil snorted. “Missing your ‘bird?”
“Missing land.”
“You spent last night on land.”
“Not the right land.”
Virgil raised an eyebrow at that. “You seemed quite happy with at least one of the inhabitants.”
That prompted a smile on his big brother’s face. “Fishing for details?”
“Some. Not too much.”
Scott turned to him and shrugged. “It was fun. Mel is an interesting woman.”
Half a smile. “I’ll give her that much.” A curious eyebrow. “See it going any further?”
Scott’s expression was thoughtful. “Maybe.”
“Invite her over for Christmas.”
“Tomorrow?”
“Why not?”
“Late notice.”
“You have a Thunderbird.”
That thoughtfulness increased and a slight smile curved his brother’s lips.
“Invite Sam and Liam while you’re at it. We owe them cake. Alan ate theirs.” And Virgil owed Sam an explanation.
That frown returned. “You sure?”
“Sure. The more the merrier.” A snort. “Hell, have them over for a few days. It will give Melissa the chance to check out our ecosystem, she’ll be ecstatic.” A pause and then quietly. “It will give me a chance to speak to Sam about...” A fractured image came to mind and he realised it meant whale. An indrawn breath. Oh god. One concept. He understood something. He could not reproduce it. It wasn’t just sound. It was something else. A combination of visual and auditory. How? His throat froze up. Hell.
“Virgil?”
“I...” The concept tantalised him. His fingers itched for his pencils, his paints and his piano all at once. How?
How?
He swallowed and realised his heart rate was up again. “I...need my tablet...and stylus.”
Scott stared at him a moment before standing up and making his way aft.
It was a sign of how preoccupied Virgil was that his tablet appeared almost immediately in his hands.
He didn’t hesitate. His fingers pulled up his drawing app, his stylus connected with the surface and lines appeared.
Lines. Curves.
Shapes.
Interwoven.
No.
Not right.
The stylus squeaked across the screen.
More lines. More shapes.
The screen became black with them, so he added colour. It splashed and bled across the lines.
“Virgil.”
It still wasn’t right.
Frustration stirred and he groaned at the image.
A blink.
Sound.
He scratched more lines, but the moment of inspiration faded.
He couldn’t do it.
“Virgil.”
It wasn’t a single dimension. It was many. Visual, sound and...and...
Emotion.
How?
It all came back to that question.
He let the tablet and stylus drop, clenching his eyes shut and rubbing his face with his hands.
How the hell could he communicate emotion?
-o-o-o-
John squirrelled himself away. Eos had contacted him to give her report, but there was something in her tone that told him not to take it on an open line.
So, he waited until Gordon got the boat moving and Scott had corralled Virgil before retreating to his cabin for some privacy.
“Did you receive a clear enough signal?”
“Affirmative, John. The upgrade to Virgil’s comms worked perfectly. I am confident I received the full spectrum of the whale’s emissions.”
“Any conclusions?”
“Tentative. And at least an explanation why Virgil is so relaxed in their presence.”
John frowned. “Show me.” The tablet in his hand, the same waterproof device he had clung to as they were tossed from the boat, lit up and a hologram hung above it.
It was a series of graphs mapping sound waves, several equations scrolled down one side. The frown on John’s face deepened. That was some seriously complex math. “Talk to me, Eos.”
“Multiple carrier waves interact synergistically to create other waves which also carry data. This is truly a multidimensional sound.” The waves on several of the graphs split up to show their originating structures.
“Can you decipher a language?”
“Not a simple language, no. Initial assessment leads me to believe this is at least partially a graphical language. The mathematics reveal vector information is part of the transmission.”
John’s eyes widened. “Any interpretation?”
The graphs disappeared to reveal fragmented moving lines and clouded shape. “These images are calculated using a section of song the mother whale was singing to Virgil.”
“Can you see a pattern?”
“Not presently, however, I am still analysing. One aspect to be considered is this...”
A second grouping of graphics appeared beside the main display. This was smaller and lacked colour, the lines far more fragmented and the whole composition was fogged with what appeared to be static. “What?”
“That is Virgil’s vocalisation while he was in contact with the whale, if it is run through the same mathematical algorithm.” The two graphics were suddenly overlaid together. Virgil’s section fit like a piece of a puzzle into the larger composition, as if it was an unfinished section awaiting colour.
“How? Why is Virgil picking this up, but the rest of us are not?”
The graphs returned along with one new one. “I retrieved Virgil’s EEG readings from his last head injury.” Lines lit up in red on several of the graphs. “Several of the carrier waves create a binaural beat. The result is that at least part of the whale’s communication is nestled in frequencies that resonate with human brainwave activity. Virgil’s, in particular, appear to align well. I hypothesise that this facilitates his receptivity.”
John stared at the lines denoting Virgil’s delta wave production. A flick of his fingers and the graph overlaid that section of the whale’s vocal output. Delta waves were well known for their calming effect and their influence on sleep. It would definitely explain his brother’s thrall and lethargy during each encounter.
The red lines glared at him.
An exhaled breath. “So, no chance of a translation?”
“Not any time soon. The transmission is extremely complex and I have yet to reveal all of the carrier signals, much less decipher the entire data stream.”
Eos fell silent a moment and John stared at the graphs, watching them move in rhythm with each other. “Why hasn’t this been discovered before?”
“Recording equipment. Of the recordings I have examined, only three have managed to record enough detail to even hint at the complexity. Today’s samples are of the highest resolution ever taken. Further clarity would be achieved with multiple recordings.”
Which meant more encounters. The sight of Virgil singing on the whale was eerie and unsettling. He may have held back Scott from going to Virgil’s assistance, but the truth was he had to hold himself back just as much.
“Is it causing Virgil any harm?”
Eos didn’t answer immediately and it gave John the chance to ramp up his concern just a notch.
“I cannot locate any medical effects beyond a tendency towards inducing sleep due to some of the frequencies involved. I would recommend further monitoring, however.”
“I agree.” An indrawn breath. “Thank you, Eos.” He blinked and realised exactly what his daughter had just done. His eyes widened just a little. “Continue analysis. This is an important scientific discovery and you have done some excellent work.”
“Really?” Her voice was ever so hopeful, ever so young.
“Of course. I’m looking forward to working on this with you.” There was definitely work to be done and soon.
“Thank you, John.”
“No, Eos, thank you.”
Her giggle bounced across comms. Sometimes so old, yet always ever so young. Her youth was always surprising as was her need for guidance. “Could you please send me Virgil’s vitals, both during the encounter and now?”
“Yes, John.” More numbers appeared above his tablet. Fortunately, they were all healthy numbers, though Virgil’s heart rate was up somewhat. A flick of his fingers and Scott’s vitals appeared beside Virgil’s. Both brothers’ heart rates echoed each other.
John would have felt like he was spying on his family, but he did it so often for reassurance on Five that it now barely registered. Another flick of his fingers and he directed Five to focus on A Little Lightning. He found his eldest brothers on the bow of the yacht. Virgil appeared to be drawing on his tablet.
“He is well, John. I can see no after effects from his encounter.”
John wondered if he could coerce his brother into an EEG exam when they made it home. Roping Scott in would probably manage it, but the stress on both of them would be considerable and he hesitated to aggravate either of them.
Perhaps further down the track, or if Virgil gave him any reason for concern.
God, he hoped not.
A sigh. He had probably jinxed himself last night acknowledging the vacation they were on. Since he woke up to Virgil’s snoring early that morning, things had changed. Sure, surfing with Gordon had been fun, but seeing Scott stressing over Virgil on the beach and the events that followed right up until they returned to A Little Lightning had been anything but relaxing.
One of Virgil’s piano sonatas started playing over his tablet ever so softly.
Despite himself, he smiled. “I’m fine, Eos.”
“You’re worrying again. This is not good for your hair production.”
He blinked. “What?”
“Several sources state that stress can disable the pigment production in human hair follicles, resulting in white, often termed ‘grey’, hairs. I believe this is a negatively viewed characteristic and I have noted that your elder brothers have encountered this issue already. It causes distress, therefore it should be prevented.”
Another blink. “Both of my older brothers have dark hair. Grey becomes very apparent in contrast.”
“It will turn your hair pink.”
“What?” This conversation was ridiculous. “It is a natural ageing process. There is very little that can be done about it.” A breath. “I’m not vain, Eos.”
She didn’t answer immediately. “But your brothers are?”
“My brothers are my brothers, Eos.”
“Well, that makes little sense.”
“Just accept them as they are.”
“Is it possible to accept them any other way?”
“No, not really.”
“Then that statement is redundant.”
“Eos.”
“Yes?”
Frivolous distraction, Eos-style. She had become quite adept at it. Moving his thoughts off worrying topics. A sigh. “Thank you, Eos.”
She didn’t answer immediately, but then...
“Did you know Virgil dyes his hair?”
-o-o-o-
Scott watched his brother draw somewhat manically on his tablet. The resultant art was far from what the artist usually produced. This was all sharp lines and angles followed by random blob shapes. At first it was all in pencil, but then Virgil started adding colours. There was no pattern, it was all haphazard and, worse, it appeared to be aggravating him.
“Virgil.”
His brother groaned in frustration, his eyebrows creasing his face in half and swallowing the scar on his forehead.
“Virgil.”
But he suddenly stopped, realisation on his face morphing into disappointment and more frustration.
The tablet and stylus slipped from Virgil’s hands and Scott was hard pressed to catch them.
But he did.
Virgil’s eyes were scrunched shut and he rubbed his face with his hands.
Scott glanced at the mess on the tablet and shoved it to one side, turning to his brother. “Virgil, talk to me.”
“I can’t.” It was small and hoarse.
“Can’t what?”
“Can’t...express, explain...trying to understand...it’s a mess...”
Okay, this was well outside his realm, but he knew Virgil. He slipped off his seat and knelt in front him. Gently he pulled those hands away from his brother’s face to reveal worried brown eyes. “Stop. Take a breath.”
Virgil stared at him a moment before the soft command was obeyed and he drew in air. Those eyes closed briefly and his brother’s shoulders dropped. “Sorry.”
“Nothing to be sorry about.”
“I ruined it again. I’ve stressed you out.”
“This time, I don’t think you had much say in it. Mamma Whale was very determined to say hello.” A small smile. “I think you have a music fan.”
Virgil snorted softly and Scott knew he’d broken through even if just a little. “She definitely wanted to talk. I just wish I knew what she wanted to say.”
“You picked up something, though, didn’t you?”
A quiet sigh. “She was happy and surprised.” Virgil looked up and stared out into the ocean, but Scott could tell he wasn’t seeing the waves.
He wondered what he was thinking.
“How could you tell?”
The frown returned. “I don’t know.” A pause caught in thought. “The sound makes me feel? The sound is...everything.”
Virgil stopped speaking, lost again to whatever was in his head.
Scott swallowed and tried a different tactic. “I think you made a mistake.”
Brown eyes snapped to him immediately. “What?”
“You should have asked Mel out. Lost opportunity, bro.”
Virgil stared at him. “What?”
“She had the hots for you, Virg, and you ignored her.”
“Last time Raoul erupted? She tried to climb me like a tree. Kay had to drag her out of the cockpit.”
It was Scott’s turn to stare. “Really?”
“She was very exuberant in her thanks.”
Scott smiled. “She knows what she likes.” And yes, admittedly, she was very good at climbing, after all Scott was taller. His smile widened.
Virgil’s stare intensified until plain, straight human communication got the message across and his brother groaned. “God, Scott, TMI.”
Total innocence. “I didn’t say anything.”
“You didn’t have to. The image is radiating off your skin.”
Scott sniggered.
Distraction achieved.
“Well, I did say you lost an opportunity.”
“That’s fine, Jungle Jim, she’s all yours.”
Scott shrugged. He could always hope. She certainly knew how to press all his buttons. “Still think we should have her over for Christmas?”
“Yeah, Gordon will love it.”
“What about you?”
“I need to speak to Sam.”
“You don’t have to.”
“I want to.”
“Okay.” A breath. “Just take it easy.”
His brother nodded and returned to staring out at the ocean. “It will be good to get home.”
Scott stood up slowly and sat back down beside his brother. “Yeah, it will.”
So good.
-o-o-o-
“Are we there yet?” Alan’s voice was particularly whiny, no doubt, specifically designed to irritate.
Gordon turned away from the helm to look at him. “Do you see an island in front of us?”
Alan shoved his hands in his pockets. “Nope.”
“There’s your answer.”
It had been quiet on the bridge for the last few hours. Gordon was grateful for the time to think. A Little Lightning cut through the water ever so smoothly. It was satisfying to see the swell pass by knowing that they were one wave closer to home.
Gordon loved being out on the ocean. It was his native element. But at the moment he longed for the safety of Tracy Island. That last encounter with the whales had its own sense of wonder, but until he understood exactly what the effect was on his older brother, he wasn’t entirely comfortable.
It was weird and unnerving.
And it worried him.
“They been out there long?” Alan was staring at the two men sitting on the bow of the boat.
“Yeah, couple of hours at least.”
“Do you think Virgil is okay?”
No. “Yeah, he’ll be fine.”
Alan eyed him. “I’m not a kid anymore. I don’t need protecting. Since when have you become one of them?” He pointed at his eldest brothers.
Gordon sighed. “I’m not. It’s just...I don’t know, okay? It was weird and amazing and I need to talk to him and he was spaced out and his singing was...”
“Weird?”
“Yeah.”
There was silence for a moment, but Gordon knew it wouldn’t be long.
Sure enough.
“Do you think Virg can talk to whales?”
“I don’t know, Alan.” It was said on one long exhale.
“He communicated something, didn’t he?”
“I don’t know, okay?” And that was the problem. There was so much they didn’t know. Gordon was itching to get into the in-depth literature, to find out more and fill the gaps in his knowledge so he could help his brother. He would be speaking to Sam as soon as possible, but for the moment, the priority was getting Virgil home.
“Some vacation.” It was said with a pout.
Gordon sighed and shoved on the autopilot before turning to his younger brother. “Alan, out with it.”
“What?”
“What’s bugging you.”
“I thought that was obvious. Virgil going zombie and singing to a whale is enough, don’t you think? As if appendicitis wasn’t dramatic already.”
Gordon stared at Alan. “He is going to be okay.”
“You don’t know that. You just said so!”
“He sang to a whale, Alan. They are one of the gentlest creatures on the planet. If he was going to choose a weird conversation partner, he chose well.”
“But you don’t know what it did to him!”
“It didn’t do anything to him.”
“You don’t know that!”
“Alan-“
“Don’t lie to me!” The words shot across the bridge and slapped Gordon in the face.
Voice calm and quiet and not a little hurt. “I have never lied to you, Alan.”
Blue fire glared at him. “You haven’t? Not even to protect the littlest one? Scared I might burst into tears.”
Gordon stared at his little brother. “What is it?”
“Have you?!”
“No! I’ve always told you the truth. You know that!” He let out an aggravated breath. “What is wrong, Allie?”
“What do you think? First you, then Virgil, and now this!”
“What?!” Him? Virgil? Oh...shit. “Virgil is okay. Hell, I’m okay. Allie, we are all fine.”
“That’s what he keeps saying!” Alan shoved a finger in Virgil’s direction. “He’s always fine, even when he’s not. You’re all the same. Big tough guys, nothing is ever wrong. You could be bleeding to death and you’d ‘be fine’. What is wrong with admitting you’re hurt? What is so wrong with being hurt that you have to hide it?”
Gordon opened his mouth, but nothing came out.
“Well, you know what? I’m scared and I’m sick of hiding it. Virgil nearly fell out of the damned sky with his infected appendix. It could have killed him. And now he’s scaring everyone with this whale thing.” A harshly indrawn breath. “Don’t tell me Scott’s not worried. I’m not stupid.”
Two steps and Gordon was in front of his brother, his hands landing on shoulders that were just that touch higher than his own and tighter strung than Virgil’s piano. “Allie, he’s going to be okay.”
“You keep saying that.”
“Because it is true.”
Something unintelligible and Alan was wrapped around him like a limpet. Gordon held his little brother. It was unusual and alarming. Alan usually went to Scott for comfort. Gordon was for pranks and cohorting. “It’s okay to be upset. It’s okay to be worried. You can cry if you need to.”
“I’m not going to cry!” Alan pulled away and glared up at Gordon.
“What?”
“Now you think I’m the baby that needs to bawl on your shoulder?”
“What?!” The hell was going on? Some conscious part of his brain was aware of the yacht’s engine, the high speed they were travelling and the fact autopilot on water was vastly different from the sky and he really should be paying attention. But Alan needed...something. “Allie, you’ve lost me. What do you want?!”
“I want Virgil to be okay. I want you to be okay.”
“We are okay!”
“Then stop scaring me!”
“I didn’t scare you!”
“You....you terrified me, Gordon. You terrified all of us.”
“I didn’t do it on purpose.”
“Still hurt.”
“Aww, Allie...” What could he do?
“And now, here you are ‘okay’, and it could happen again, and...” A shaky swallow. “I’m scared, okay? You’re fine. Virgil’s fine. But you’re not, and...I’m not okay...okay?”
This time it was Gordon wrapping his arms around his not so little brother. “I’m sorry, Allie.”
Muffled into Gordon’s shoulder. “Not your fault.”
“No.” But he should have realised it was still messing with his little brother. Alan was the least experienced of them all. Gordon had seen things, done things, things that hopefully Alan would never have to experience. Quietly. “I think Virgil is a little freaked out. I don’t think he understands what happened much more than we do. But we are going to find out. I’m going to speak to Sam. We’re going to do some research and we will find out why the song affected Virgil the way it did. But he is okay, Alan. Tracy’s honour. A little shaken up. A little worried. But he is okay. We’ll work through this like we always do.”
His brother’s arms tightened around him just that little bit more, but Alan didn’t say anything.
A rustle of fabric and Gordon looked up to see John standing in the doorway staring at them with a hint of worry in his eyes.
“John?”
Alan startled and pulled away immediately. Turquoise followed his every move.
A slow blink and John stepped onto the bridge. “Eos is deciphering the song. We have a good idea as to why Virgil reacted the way he did.” It was said calmly and factually for such a great discovery.
“You do?” Alan found his voice first.
Those eyes latched onto Gordon’s. “We do.”
The helm beeped.
A blink and Gordon was back at the wheel, scanning their position. A mass of volcanic rock and tropical reef appeared on navigational sensors.
A familiar chunk of rock and reef.
Tracy Island.
Home.
-o-o-o-
End Day Four, Part Five.
40 notes · View notes
sparklemichele · 5 years
Photo
Tumblr media
Política
Coco Cruz X Black Reader
You pulled your car into Romero Brothers Scrap and Salvage yard. As you got out your car you noticed a few guys in leather cuts gathered by Harleys. Where did Leticia send you?
“Can I help you?” EZ asked you.
“I’m looking for Coco Cruz.”
Hearing his name Coco looked over in your direction. He wondered who you were as he threw his cigarette down and headed in your direction.
“I’m Coco. Who are you?”
So, this was Leticia’s father. She failed to mention he was a Mayan.
“Hi, I’m Y/N. I’m Leticia’s guidance counselor. Someone swiped my car and took off the side mirror. She told me to come here and ask for you. You might have a mirror in stock to put on my car.”
Coco took you in before answering. You were cute with your dark brown skin that looked as if the sun itself kissed your skin, your hair was pulled up in a cute afro puff and your body was off the chain especially the way your jeans were hugging your hips and ass. Coco licked his lips.
“Yeah, I think we can help you.” He finally answered.
“I’m EZ.” EZ butted in shaking your hand. “I think we may have a mirror. Let me go check the back.”
“Thank you.” You smiled at EZ before he took off to look for a mirror for your car.
You turned your attention back to Coco.
“Mr. Cruz, I wanted to speak with you a moment about Leticia.”
“Call me Coco.”
“Ok, Coco I wanted to ask what were your plans for Leticia after school? She has yet to apply to any colleges.”
“She doesn’t think she can get into college.”
“She has drastically improved her grades. She can get into the local community college and then transfer to a university in two years.”
“I didn’t realize that.”
“Since living with you Leticia has been doing excellent. You should be proud.”
Coco’s face lit up with a smile and your breath caught in your throat at his smile and his high cheek bones. He wasn’t your usual type but something about him made you shift on your feet. He was oddly sexy.
“I will talk to her tonight about putting an app in to community college.”
“I actually printed one for you.” You opened your car door and grabbed the envelope from the passenger seat. As you turned around Coco slowly looked up at you. He was staring at your ass. You could not help but smile a little as you handed him the envelope. “If you two need help, I will be glad to help you.”
“Thanks. I appreciate this.” Coco took the envelope. “You want to come inside for a beer while EZ looks for your part?”
“Sure, I will like that.”
You followed Coco into what you assumed was their clubhouse. Coco introduced you as Leticia’s counselor from school. All the men who introduced themselves seem very nice but very intimidating. You and Coco sat at a nearby table with all eyes on you both.
“What kind of beer do you like?” Coco asked ignoring everyone’s stares.
“A Bud Light would be fine.” Coco nodded and called out to someone name Chucky to bring you a Bud Light and him a Corona.
You successfully hid your surprised when the gentleman with mostly false fingers handed you and Coco your beers. You wanted to ask what happen but knew that was rude.
“You know Letty mentioned a counselor that has been helping her a lot. That’s you?”
You nodded yes as you took a sip of beer.
“Letty can be a handful I appreciate you taking the time with her.”
“She really is a sweet lady.”
Coco busted out laughing. You could not help but chuckle with him as his laugh was infectious.
“Don’t let that innocent face fool you.” He told you.  
“Oh, come on she can’t be that bad.” You took a hefty swig of your beer.
“Ok. I will let you believe that…….naw seriously though she has gotten a lot better.”
“I’m glad to hear that. She has such a bright future.”
You and Coco talked about Leticia and a little about yourselves as you waited for EZ to come back. You could not help but notice that most of the members were smiling at you two. What was going on you thought to yourself.
“Why is everyone staring at us?” You whispered as you leaned into the table for him to hear. Coco looked around and everyone averted their eyes like they were not staring at you both.
“They’re not use to seeing someone so beautiful come in here.”
That brought a big smile to your face. He thought you were beautiful. You had to remind yourself of your policy because you were getting lost in his brown eyes. He’s not your type Y/N! You screamed in your head. But what if you forfeit your policy just once. He looked like he would turn you out. You thought as you admired his eyes, lips, neck tattoos and tattoo sleeves. Your mind was going straight in the gutter when EZ finally entered the clubhouse.
“About time boy scout!”
“I found you a mirror and installed it.”
“Oh, thank you so much.” You stood up from the table. Coco eyes followed you. “How much do I owe you?”
“It’s on the house.” Coco answered as he stood up.
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah.”
“Thank you so much.”
“I’ll walk you out.” Coco told you as he followed you out. You both walked in silence to your car. You wandered what he was thinking.
“Not that you owe me or anything, but I would like to take you out.” So that was what he was thinking. You leaned against your car looking at him up and down. What would one night hurt? Stop it!
“You know Coco I would love that, but I have a policy that I don’t date my student’s parents.”
You saw a flash of hurt across his face.
“You are not her teacher.”
“I’m her counselor which is just as important.”
Coco smiled and you felt your heart pound in your chest.
“One thing you should know about me is I don’t give up easily on something I want.” Coco walked up closer to you.
“Really now.” You raised and eyebrow at him.
“Yeah, you gonna break that policy for me.”
His confidence was a huge turn on.
“Well we will just have to see, won’t we?” You opened your car door and got in. Coco closed the door for you.
“I’ll be seeing you.”
“You started your car. “Maybe you will, maybe you won’t.” With that you pulled off leaving Coco smiling. You were going to be a challenge and he just knew you would be worth it.
Tumblr media
@rosey1981 @angels-reyes @emmysrandomthoughts @titty-teetee @readsalot73 @kmhappybunny @laketaj24 @princess-of-fuckup @zoogrl05 @hidden-treasures21​ @glimmerglittergirl​ @est1887​ @designerwriterchic​ @jennadoll19-blog​ @deepfrz​ @1000heartbeats​ @piccasoe​ @tashawar​ @whatsthemagicword-now​ @topshopwhxre​ @try-n-pronounce-it​ @fangirlextraordinaire​ @racing-against-the-sunset​
268 notes · View notes
go-events · 5 years
Photo
Tumblr media Tumblr media
GO Rom Com Spotlight: @epi-vet​
The most excellent @epi-vet​ (also Epivet on AO3 and epivet on Spotify) has claimed Persuasion to adapt for Good Omens in the Good Omens Rom Com Event.
For reference, here’s a little background about the source material!
About Persuasion: Eight years ago, Anne Elliot rejected Frederick Wentworth, the man she loved, out of a sense of duty and obedience. Now an ignored and faded spinster, she follows her financially stricken family from their home, only to be reintroduced to the now successful and wealthy Captain Frederick Wentworth. With their roles reversed and Captain Wentworth the eligible and wealthy bachelor, Anne navigates the scheming society that still tries to keep them apart.
We spent some time chatting about how the adaptation is coming so far, as well as future plans for it! Now, get to know @epi-vet​ a little better!
* * *
goromcom: You know how if you open a Tumblr chat with someone you haven't chatted to before, Tumblr tells you two things they post about? I wanted to tell you that yours reports that you post "about #geeky data and #good omens". I can appreciate someone with an affinity for geeky data. Can you share any sort of interesting geeky data with us?
epi-vet: #Geeky data is fun, but my favorite homegrown tag is #QuantifiedFandom. In the real world, I work with a lot of data for modeling and prediction. I liked the idea of using those skills to understand the fandom better by looking at the data crumbs around it. Right after I saw the show, I was intrigued by how quickly Good Omens playlists multiplied on Spotify. Then I did what any totally health sane person would do. I downloaded 300 Good Omens themed playlists and started crunching numbers. Throughout the summer and fall, more and more playlists were popping up. I did a second pretty exhaustive pull of 1400 playlists in December. I analyzed the most common songs, length of playlists, artists, differences between playlist themes (Ineffable Husbands versus Demon Crowley), and more. Two of the top four songs weren’t even in the show (#1 Good Old-Fashioned Lover Boy and #4 From Eden). Bob Dylan’s You Angel You is the most underappreciated Ineffable Husbands song. “You angel, you; You got me under your wing...” Really. Google the lyrics, we’ll wait.
I’m epivet on Spotify where you can find the top 100 songs from Good Omens-themed playlists, the top 50 Ineffable Husbands songs, and my own scene by scene playlist with links to a Google doc explaining each selection and identifying key lyrics because, again, totally healthy sane person here. I’m also running the GORomCom discord-created playlists as well.
goromcom: And I listen to those playlists a lot! Thank you! But on to your rom com! You chose to adapt Persuasion. Has this story been a favorite of yours, or is there some other reason you chose it?
epi-vet: I’m a longtime Jane Austen fan. I love how she pokes at the constraints and absurdities of her time. Persuasion is my favorite because the characters are more mature, more human. Anne breaks off her engagement with Wentworth, and while she regrets how things have turned out 7 years later, she also can still see the reasonableness of her choice. The story has one villain and some unsavory characters, but many of the characters are complicated people who make the best decisions they can (except for Anne’s father who is ridiculous).
The 1995 movie is infinitely better than the 2007 one; I will brook no argument.
goromcom: I wouldn’t dare! :) What's your favorite moment of the story, and are you looking forward to presenting it in your adaptation? Any loose plans for that scene that you can share?
epi-vet: Wentworth’s letter to Anne in the dramatic climax:  You pierce my soul. I am half agony, half hope. Tell me not that I am too late, that such precious feelings are gone for ever. I offer myself to you again with a heart even more your own than when you almost broke it, eight years and a half ago. *swoon*
I’m still working that scene out, so I’ll instead share some fun I’m having making poor Gabriel my comic relief. The book opens with the Anne’s father reading his own entry in the Baronetage. His rank defines him, so reading a Who’s Who provides him the reassurance he needs. Gabriel begins my RomCom loudly reading his visitation of Mary, especially loving the “Fear not, Mary” line. He soon after complains to Michael “[the humans] don’t even cower before us. Really, when was the last time we had to say, ‘Be not afraid?’” He also serves as my Lady Dalrymple in the Italian concert scene from the 1995 movie. Aziraphale is trying to keep Crowley from leaving (due to genre typical misunderstandings), and Sandalphon is pulling him back saying Gabriel needs him to explain the buffet – he’s worried he’ll Fall if he eats shellfish.
goromcom: Oh goodness, so many angel/demon shenanigans. I can’t wait. Other than those details, do you plan to stick very closely to the beats of the original story, or make bigger changes?
epi-vet: I think one of the best Jane Austen adaptations ever is Clueless. When we watch a period drama, we view everything through a buffer of temporal distance. Everything is slightly foreign, and it can soften the impact that a contemporary reader would have felt. I suspect viewers of Clueless, in some ways, have an experience much closer to Jane Austen’s readers’ experience of Emma.
I’m taking the plot of Persuasion and applying it as closely as I can to our characters from the moment the tv show ends. I did lots of character mapping and tried to stay true to the heart of the work, like Amy Heckerling did to Emma in Clueless. I did end up with one original character because I just couldn’t figure out how to work the plot with only Good Omen canon characters.
goromcom: I’m actually a big fan of Clueless as an Austen adaptation too, so I like where you’re going with this. 
Let me see if I can get one more tidbit out of you before I stop! What's an interesting decision you've made in your planning so far--a notable casting decision, a changing of venue, or some other plan you have to paint Good Omens all over your rom com?
epi-vet: Since I’m writing it as post canon in the Good Omens universe rather than putting Aziraphale and Crowley into Regency Britain, I get off easy there. I am trying to take a lot of the dialog between Aziraphale and Crowley from the show and flip it. So Aziraphale is the one who needs to do something or Crowley will never speak to him again. Aziraphale is unforgiveable. Also, I’m including some nods to the Good Omens book. Crowley takes the properly demonic activity of gluing coins to the sidewalk into the tech age with an app. It, of course, backfires spectacularly. I also have a hopefully charming and funny Golden Girls reference.
goromcom: Always down for a Golden Girls reference. Rose is my homegirl. But let’s leave some things undiscovered until your story debuts, and move on to the final question. I am blatantly stealing this last question from The Good Place: The Podcast, but here goes: Tell me something "good". It can be something big or small. It can be a charity you think is doing good work, or you can talk about how great your pet is.
epi-vet: RIPMedicalDebt. For pennies on the dollar, you can wipe out someone’s medical debt. For everyone outside the US, this is a completely bizarre concept, but it’s a big deal in the US. Medical debt happens when you lack health insurance or have limited health insurance. You didn’t charge too much on your credit card. You didn’t buy a house you can’t afford. Something happened to your health, you sought the care you needed, and you are now destitute. These debts don’t get paid back often so they get bundled and sold to various institutions. RIPMedicalDebt buys those debts cheaply and then forgives the balances owed. Individuals, community organizations, churches, and other groups have used them to do immense good.
goromcom: So important, and I had no idea this existed. Thank you for sharing it with us. 
And also, thank you for sharing details of your upcoming GO adaptation of Persuasion, coming very soon now!
20 notes · View notes
sublimestarker · 5 years
Text
Starker smut - Trim my hedges
Tumblr media
Peter Parker was loaded. Most of it was family money, inherited by his parents and his uncle, but he still managed to double that amount. He worked on apps, and sometimes invested in properties and stock, with his aunt’s permission. “You’re only 19, Peter live your life while you’re young” she’d say and if he had a penny for every time he heard it and rolled his eyes, he’d be even richer. But even she couldn’t deny that their luxurious lifestyle had it’s perks - a nice apartment in Queens and a vacation home in the Hamptons. They were currently there, the July sun shining on Peter’s Ray-Bans as he watched his aunt showing the new gardener around. He knew that the staff never stuck around for too long, so he opted for scrolling through his phone instead of watching the man. Peter was forced to meet him later, when May introduced them.
“Peter, this is our new gardener, Anthony Stark.”
“Please call me Tony.” He said and stretched his hand out to the younger man. Tony, in his tank top and his dirty gardening gloves shaking hands with Peter who was dressed in Gucci pants and had a new Rolex on his wrist was a sight.
“Alright boys, play nice.” May ordered, before going back in the house.
“Kid, you should go in too, I’m gonna trim the hedges and it will get pretty loud.”
“Don’t worry, I have these.” Peter fished out a pair of Airpods from his pocket, and placed them in his ears, his music on low volume, so that he stayed focused. He wanted to observe the gardener a bit more. That guy wasn’t May’s usual type - tall, blonde, with muscles and blue eyes, like the precious ones. Peter particularly missed Steve Rogers, or Captain America,as they called him and a guy who he just called Thor. He had fucked them both, leading to their unemployment, thanks to his aunt. He still remembers the vicious arguments they got in.
“If you didn’t want me to have sex with guys who are twice my age you shouldn’t bring them over.” Peter yelled as he saw that May had fired Steve. His nerves got the best of him and he knew it.
“I didn’t bring them over, I asked them to work for me. You should really think of who you’re seen with, your little hookups can lead to bad press.” May shouted back. He hadn’t seen her this angry with him since he gambled last year.
“Bad press? What is this the 60s. I can sleep with whomever I want and the paparazzi won’t bat an eyelash.”
“Though you should be free to do whatever you want with your body, I’m still the adult here, Peter. There should be some limits. I just want the best for you, I don’t want you to get hurt like last time.”
“We’re still on that. I told you it was just a one time thing.”
“Is that why you were cooped up crying in your room for months. Because of a one time thing. Look I don’t want another Bucky breaking your heart.”
“Don’t call him that. Only I can say that. To you and everyone else he’s James.”
“But he wasn’t, wasn’t he. He was Bucky to his wife and kids, wasn’t he.”
“Get out.”
“Peter I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to overstep my boundaries.”
“I said get out.” He screamed, face red and tears welling up in his eyes. He even threw a framed picture at where May stood moments ago.
Peter was snapped out of that memory when he felt his gardener tapping him on the shoulder.
“You’re so deep in thoughts that you didn’t feel that the first few times, huh kid. Anyway, I need to mow the lawn, so I’d suggest you move.”
“You don’t make the suggestions here. If I wanted I could get you fired right here on the spot.”
“Nice try kid, but I know that your aunt’s the boss here. Plus what are you going to do after you fire me? Replace me with a blonde, blue eyed muscular jock.”
Peter clenched his fist in anger.
“May told you.”
“Yeah, she didn’t want me making the same mistakes as the previous gardeners. Though looking at your attitude, I’m sure she won’t have a problem.”
“You don’t know anything about me.”
“Oh, I know everything about you. Because I was you. I was a rich brat, with lots of cash and lots of fuck buddies.”
“Anthony Stark, Tony Stark, my father used to know your father. Wait, the Wikipedia article said that you ran away from home one night and that you’ve been MIA ever since.”
“Yeah kid, I know what it says, I wrote it. The truth isn’t that glamorous or mysterious. One night my old man saw me sneaking in my boyfriend. He banished me, it was a different time then. And I’ve been on my own since then. I was 18 and on the street, it was literally rags to riches, but well riches to rags. I tried a lot of things. Took a few odd jobs, went to community college, even tried to get back into the family business after my dad passed. Well nothing worked and here I am, in what I’m convinced is my personal hell on earth.”
“Why did you take this job then? You knew what you were getting into.”
“Because it’s the only way I can get money.”
“You see that little garden over there - Steve planted marigolds for me when he was still here. They should bloom in a week. If you stay at your job until then, you’re free to leave and I’ll even give you an extra 10 k. But if i seduce you before that, you’ll have to work here, all summer, every year. Do we have a deal?”
“Sure kid. Just don’t go crying when you can’t afford to get a new Audi because I can keep it in my pants.”
The next day Peter set his plan in motion, thanking God that May had to go back to New York to handle some unexpected business. He was going simple - sunbathing while Tony was working. So he sat in his chaise lounge, Versace sunglasses on and a tiny pink thong. Better to leave somethings to the imagination. Plus skinny dipping in his pool was one of his other options.
Seeing that his gardener was coming, Peter rubbed some tanning lotion on his milky white skin, before saying seductively.
“Hey, can you help me with the back.”
“Sure kid.”
He spread the lotion down the younger man’s back, obeying every command to go lower.
Tony’s hands were millimeters from Peter’s ass, when the older man leaned in and whispered in his ear.
“Why don’t you get dressed before your neighbor comes over to greet you.”
“Neighbor? Wait someone’s coming over for the summer? Which house is it, the one on the left of the right?” Peter asked frantically as he covered himself with a towel. It couldn’t be, right. He wouldn’t come back here again.
“Right. Why?”
“Did you see who was there? Was it just a woman, or a man, or a couple with kids?”
“It was a couple. What don’t you know your neighbors? If it helps jog your memory, the man had a sleeve tattoo of a biomechanical arm, can’t miss it.”
“Bucky.”
“You do know them. So, what is Bucky some old guy, whose son you fucked or something?.”
“He’s my ex. And he absolutely mustn’t see me.”
As if on que, there was a ring on the doorbell.
“Please get it.”
“Kid you have to reap what you sew. I’m not bailing you out.”
“I’ll pay you.”
“Get in the house before he can see you.” Peter flashed him a smile, before jogging into the house. Locking himself in his room, he peaked through the curtains to see what was going on. He could spot Bucky and Tony arguing, then his ex leaving. His gardener then climbed up the stairs and knocked on Peter’s door.
“Thank Tony. I owe you one.”
“Cash rules everything around me, kid. Now come on, give me the money, Parker.”
“How about a blowjob, it’s worth more than I could ever give you in cash.” Peter tried his luck.
“The money, now.” Tony said through his teeth, one hand gripping Peter’s throat.
“Yes daddy.” The younger man replied instinctively, and made a mental note of how Tony bit his lip at that. Peter grabbed a pen and his checkbook, writing a quick cheque to Tony.
“There’s an extra grand for your silence on everything that happened.”
“Pleasure working with you kid.”
Peter could see Bucky’s car driving away, thanks to someone telling Ms. Barnes exactly where her husband had been earlier.
A few days passed and Peter tried his best to seduce Tony. From skimpy outfits to touches that lingered on for more that they should have, nothing seemed to work. But he had some tricks up his sleeve.
Tony had almost forgotten about the younger man’s seduction attempts and didn’t think much before accepting his proposal of a movie night. He was lounging on the expensive white couch with Peter in gray sweatpants beside him. The movie was Beach rats, Pete’s pick of course. But when them first sex scene started on the screen, Tony noticed something unusual, Parker was moaning. Taking his eyes from the screen Stark noticed that not only was the younger man moaning, he was touching himself. He didn’t stop stroking his cock when he noticed the gaze on him, he even started thrusting faster.
“Peter that’s indecent exposure.”
“But I’m not exposing anything, Mr. Stark. There’s a perfectly good movie and you’re watching me. Seems like you want to sleep with me.”
“Fine, if that’s how you wanna play it, I’ll watch the movie.” Tony said as he glued his eyes to the tv. He was staying focused until
“Tony” a desperate breathy moan cane from Peter’s lips. Ignore it, your will is strong.
“Mr. Stark, please.”. He’s just some little bratty twink.
“Fuck me, Tony.” You could be his dad.
“Daddy”. With that Peter came, his eyes were closed and his cheeks were a rosy shade of pink. Tony still kept his eyes on the screen, but there was a bulge in his jeans. Peter didn’t miss that and quickly came up with a plan on how to work with that.
“Well I’ll have to do laundry now. Mind if I squeeze past?” He said and accidentally fell into Tony’s lap, grinding his hips, feeling the throbbing member beneath him.
“Wow, Mr. Stark, you’re packing. You know I usually don’t care about size, but damn I’m sure you.” Before he could finish his sentence, Tony pushed him away.
“Don’t touch me, kid.”. Well plan failed.
Tomorrow was Peter’s only chance to seduce Tony. It wasn’t about the money anymore, nor was it a matter of pride. The younger man was genuinely in love and that terrified him.
Maybe if Peter fucked Tony all these feelings would just disappear. He was determined to find out. That morning they didn’t even exchange words. Tony was working by the pool when Peter jumped in. He swam a lap, before tossing his swimming trunks by the other man. Then he decided to practice his backstroke, showing off his “technique”.
“Care to join me? You don’t need a swimsuit. Come on daddy.”
Tony just sighed and started stripping. Peter’s eyes sparked up with joy. He was winning. And more importantly he was going to be fucked in his pool. Looking his crush up and down, he bit his lip. For an old man Tony had a nice body. Toned abs, big biceps, that perfect v that drove the guys crazy and his dick. Peter couldn’t wait to have it in his mouth, running his tongue over the uncircumcised length.
“Earth to Parker.” Tony was right next to him, oh god, he was so hard for the older man. “You know this week I realized that you get flustered by me. You, Peter Parker the handsome rich boy who can have any guy, likes me, an old man.”
“You’re not that old.”
Tony took steps forward and Peter backwards, until his back hit a wall. Peter’s breath hitched and Tony leaned into him, their lips millimeters apart.
“Is it worth it, if you loose all the money.” Peter asked, clearly taunting the other man.
“Everything’s worth it for you, baby boy.”
Peter closed his eyes and pressed his soft lips against Tony. But instead of feeling lips, he felt a hand. Anthony had placed his large palm between them.
“Psych.”. He said, before exiting the pool and drying off with Peter’s towel. Peter shamelessly rutted his hips against that same towel before cuming with Tony’s name on his lips.
The next day the marigolds had bloomed. Peter picked one and placed it behind his ear, as a sigh of defeat.
When Tony arrived he wasn’t dressed in his usual gardening clothes, but instead he was in a rainbow crop top and booty shorts.
“Parker where’s my cheque. I’m dying to go to the bank like this.”
“Oh, I was prepared to give you cash.” Peter said, opening his Balenciaga fanny pack to reveal stacks of 100 dollar bills.
“I want a cheque. I want to have physical proof that Peter Parker couldn’t seduce me.”
“Fine.” Peter pouted, stomping his feet up to his bedroom, followed by Tony. When he wrote the cheque, he handed it to the older man.
“Oh, Peter, one more thing.”. Before Peter could say anything, Tony pressed his lips against his. The kiss was hungry and sloppy, all tongue and teeth clashing together. The older man almost ripped off the buttons of Peter’s shirt, playing with his nipples. Tony pulled down his lover’s pants.
“Going commando? I bet you were watch me work and play with yourself, wishing that I was touching your sensitive cock, huh baby.”
“Yes, daddy.”
“Well you don’t have to wish for it any more, cause it just came true.”. Tony palmed Peter’s erection, swirling the precum from his head to the base.
“Need to taste you, baby boy.”. With one bob of his head Tony could deepthroath Peter. His cock was sensitive, he was ready to come just from that.
“Daddy please.”
“Fuck, baby boy, you have to be needier than that. As much as I like having your pretty cock in my mouth, I want you. Get on your hands and knees for daddy.”
“Lube and condoms are in the bedside drawer.”
Tony kissed Peter reassuringly, then coated his fingers in lube. His finger slid in easily.
“Baby boy, did you play with yourself this morning?”
“Yes.”
“And who did you think about?”
“You, daddy.”
“You know that bad boys get punished. Count how many spanks I’m gonna give you.”
Tony’s hand struck Peter’s bottom, loving how the younger man’s hole tightened around him. After 5 spanks Peter was a mess. His ass was red and he was drooling on the pillow, begging for Tony’s cock inside of him.
“Just a but more, baby.” said the older man. He couldn’t take the teasing either. He had to have his baby boy, now. So he just added two fingers and scissored them, opening up Peter. As the younger man moaned, Tony opened the condom and lubed it up, before entering his lover.
“Fuck, baby boy, you’re so tight for me.”
“Daddy, you’re so big, you feel so good.”
“Beg for me, Peter.”
“Daddy, please harder. I need you, please.”
“Okay, baby.”. Tony bottomed out, causing Peter to let out an almost pornographic moan.
“Right there. I’m gonna cum.”
“Say my name.”
“Tony.”
“Try again, baby boy.”
“Mr.Stark.”
“I won’t let you cum if you’re wrong one more time.”
“Daddy.”
“That’s right, baby boy. Now come for me.”. Peter came, making a mess on his bedsheets. He rode it out quickly, cock softening.
“Help daddy come, Peter. Touch yourself.”
“But I’m still sensitive, it hurts.”
“Do you want me to feel good?”
“Yes daddy.”. Peter touching himself and let out a whimper, his hard cock already twitching in his hand. Tony wrapped his fist against him, causing him to groan out and slow his pace.
“Don’t stop ,baby, I’m almost there.”. Just as Tony came, he could feel Peter’s hole tightening, the boy had come again.
“You did so good, baby boy. I’m proud of you.”
“Thank you daddy. Can you help me wash off, all this cum is sticky.”
360 notes · View notes