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dark-night-star-light · 1 year

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Spirit Animals: Against the Tide (Reread pt. 5)

DISCLAIMER: WILL CONTAIN SPOILERS FOR BOOKS ONE THROUGH SEVEN AND BOOKS ONE THROUGH FOUR IN SECOND SERIES.

Masterpost

Chapter 1

“ . . . it was enough to instantly and badly burn any foot, or boot, or paw . . . ” (2). How did the four get on top of Muttering Rock during the climax, then???

“Kings and empires had risen and fallen since his imprisonment, but still, he waited” (2). Foreshadowing Kovo saying that it’s better for kingdoms to fall than for the Wyrm to claim its host?

Kovo and Gerathon bickering like siblings is lowkey funny???

Chapter 2

“‘She’s just jumpy. We all are.’ ‘I wonder why’” (8). Abeke and Meilin’s relationship has regressed significantly . . . damn.

“Except that Abeke’s family usually made her feel uncomfortable and small and worthless, while being with Conor was easy and warm” (9). Abeke’s abusive family literally makes me so angry. Also “being with Conor was . . . warm” . . . she probably means that literally and figuratively, considering what happened in Arctica.

“‘ . . . I saw what happened when Conor and Meilin chose their families over our quest - and when Rollan nearly did . . . ’” (9). Abeke is the only one that hasn’t attempted to choose her family over the quest somehow. Huh.

“The falcon shrieked, which might have meant, ‘Oh, put your shirt back on’” (13). REJECTED.

“‘That’s not fair,’ said Rollan. ‘That’s barely hilarious at all’” (16). He does have a point.

Chapter 3

“‘They probably already know,’ Meilin said unhelpfully. ‘Since someone is passing them information, as you might remember’” (20). Meilin is so mean in this book.

“‘I thought we were friends’” (20). That’s literally so manipulative of Meilin. She was being hostile first.

“‘ . . . you realize that was the second time you were conveniently captured so you could be used as leverage against us?’” (21). The first time was Glengavin, right? But she wasn’t even used as leverage then???

“ . . . every time he thought of Shane, he wanted to punch something . . . ” (21). The third time Conor has expressed interest in punching Shane, you guys. In case you’re keeping track.

“‘I knew that boll weevil in my soup last night looked suspicious’” (23). LOL.

“He had a strong, sinking feeling that this mission was going to end with loss and disaster” (25). The foreshadowing is done with a heavy hand in this book. Not sure if I’m a fan.

Rollan and Meilin arguing for a whole page be like: Actually, I’m right-

Chapter 4

“Nope. Don’t even think about it. I refuse to be eaten by sharks” (34). I talked about this briefly during my Hunted reread, but the tone of the story after the first book is vastly different from the first book’s tone. It gets lighter and more joke-y. This quote is another example. “Nope” is a word that is too informal to have ever made an appearance in the first book.

“ . . . oh, and PS, also had deadly sharks snapping and lunging only a few feet away” (35). This book is even more informal in tone than the past three. Again, it makes sense given the change in author, it’s just interesting.

“‘Hruumf,’ she observed at the sky” (37). This is so cute.

“The top of a rockback whale was clearly no place for her, and hey Jhi was trying her best to do as Meilin had asked” (38). Yeah. Yeah, I wonder why that is.

Chapter 5

“‘Foolish stupid crazy stupid lunatic brainless-’” (41). Ladies and gentlemen, may I present the extent of cursing in this book.

“Then she started pointing to the shark bites and barking orders at everyone swimming or paddling around the whales” (44). She’s ordering people she doesn’t even know? What an icon.

“With a whoop, he did a cartwheel in the sand and fell over” (44). This is too hilarious.

“Uraza turned up her nose, flicked her tail, and stalked off toward the jungle of dark green trees visible at the top of the beach” (45). She’s back to her arrogant self, lol.

“Two islanders ran up as Kalani took off her dripping green seaweed cloak; one took it from her with careful ceremony, while the other handed her a new, dry green cloak” (47). Kalani has servants?

“‘Compassion and respect! So THERE’” (48). LMFAO.

Chapter 6

Does Abeke have trauma from island jungles?

I actually think that Ngaio and Tangaroa’s spirit animal might be the best in the whole series. Really. They literally play hide-and-seek together. That’s so cute. Also totally what I would do if I had a spirit animal.

“She almost missed the freezing wind and icy, insect-free snow of Arctica - but not really” (53). Didn’t Abeke grow up on a hot savannah? She really shouldn’t be preferring coldness to heat.

“‘Probably because he expected you to help them,’ Kalani said. ‘Instead of acting like an embarrassing mule-headed pig’s snout’” (55). This is such a teenage insult, it’s funny.

Ngaio and Tangaroa’s relationship is probably the best spirit animal bond ever.

“‘This lunatic is nearly as old as a whale king. Show a little respect for your elders’” (57). Didn’t she just call him “an embarrassing mule-headed pig’s snout” though?

“Abeke could tell that Meilin was ready to stab something. Fun was not something any of them had time for, not with the future of Erdas at stake” (58). This would be so fun to draw.

“Definitely no falling into the crocodile-infested river” (61). Seems like something Rollan would say.

Can’t Abeke call foul play on Tangaroa for the river stunt?

“It reminded Abeke a little of Kunaya, the kitten she’d rescued on their trip to find Rumfuss” (63). Oh yeah, that reminds me, what happened to Kunaya? Did Finn take her? New headcanon: Donn-Kunaya parent-child relationship.

Chapter 7

“Briggan came back from sniffing the undergrowth, licked Conor’s hand, and sat down on his foot” (66). The image of this is too funny.

“Briggan was trying very hard to look dignified, but it would be very hard for anyone, even a Great Beast, to maintain his dignity while wearing a bouncing orange hat” (68). Grumpy Briggan.

Nightshade Island is cursed because of the First Devourer War catalyst event happening there, I’m pretty sure.

Bruh, Meilin is literally physically abusing Rollan? I hope this is a one-time thing-

“‘Jhi, for the love of Mulop, would you stop rolling around like a drunk chimpanzee?’” (72). Meilin is kind of psychologically abusive toward Jhi as well.

Chapter 8

“‘Meaning people who’d rather throw a meal away than give it to a starving orphan’” (74). That wasn’t Rollan’s code of honor, though? It was don’t steal from sick or poor people, and don’t steal if there’s a better way. I guess there’s a footnote there, then.

“‘If anyone knew where we were going - if anyone spoke of this island to us - if someone helped us get there even just by giving us a canoe . . . ” (75). Why can’t they just ask someone to give them a canoe and not tell them where they were going? They can lie.

“‘I’m not sure his head is going to fit in the canoe anymore’” (76). LMFAO.

Ah yes, Essix’s iconic blood-curdling shriek.

Meilin thinks being with Rollan is like being with a panda: parallels.

“If the word tapu hadn’t already existed, Meilin thought someone would have invented it just to describe this island” (82). That’s probably what happened, though???

“It was a little weird if she thought about it, and a little weird that she liked it, and a little weird to think about Rollan at all . . . ” (83). You don’t say.

“‘I can still control Jhi . . . ’” (85). Meilin feels so toxic in this book? Like more than normal??? It’s concerning.

“ . . . [Tarik and Rollan] looking almost like father and son . . . ” (87). Foreshadowing.

Chapter 9

“Conor, Abeke, and Kalani had spent most of the day lying in a shallow hole, covered with palm fronds . . . They were waiting for it to get dark” (90). Why didn’t they just wait for it to be dark before coming? Then they wouldn't've had to be in a cramped hole.

“Conor wasn’t sure what system she was using for the symbols” (93). I kind of want to know how Kalani is marking the walls so they don’t get lost, as well.

For some reason, I remember them meeting Timone on the island itself, not in the cave system??? Huh.

“‘You can’t take us anywhere near the tribe!’” (94). Is he trying to warn Kalani about the Bile’s effects?

I kind of want to know what Timone was doing wrong with his bond to make Waka resist him before he took the Bile.

“‘That no-good shark-faced backstabbing son of a jellyfish’” (97). Kalani has such descriptive chain insults.

Chapter 10

“If only the Bile didn’t exist in the first place” (102). Foreshadowing the end of the first series?

Kovo, a Great Beast, and one that thinks humans are stupid, gives the Devourer the Bile, a substance that enslaves animals to humans. Very logical of him.

“‘You mean - he would have come to me anyway?’” (103). So that means the first Devourer is literally not even old enough to be bonded. He’s not even eleven years old.

I’m not really a fan of the use-dreams-to-further-the-plot-or-explain-things trope, and this is no exception.

“‘Thank you, Jhi,’ Tarik said. ‘Yes,’ said Rollan. ‘Thank you very, very much.’ ‘Why would it be here, on the beach?’ Meilin demanded” (108). Meilin is the only one that didn’t thank her own spirit animal.

Chapter 11

Wow, they killed a whole-ass Komodo dragon.

“They had to run, and hope against hope . . . ” (112). Hope against hope? Kind of a cool line.

Abeke! Riding! Uraza! It’s mentioned in Tales of the Great Beasts that Uraza was too proud to let just anybody ride her.

Katoa seems so cool. Like if he were human, he’d be one of those chill, laid-back surfer-type people.

Chapter 12

If Meilin has a grandfather, how come she never tries to see him? We don’t ever meet him either. Is he dead?

“They would be furious - for five minutes. Then they would roll up their sleeves and start cleaning it up” (118). Kind of reminds me of Meilin: angry during the war, but afterward she helps rebuild Zhong.

“‘She’s not,’ Meilin said. ‘I thought so at first, but . . . we are meant for each other” (119). Meilin was kind of abusive to Jhi for the majority of this book. There was a cute moment after Jhi found the shell, but before that, it was all verbal lashings.

Is this dream Jhi attempting to warn Meilin?

“‘Worse,’ murmured Jhi. ‘Oh, Meilin . . . I can’t tell you, but you need to know . . . ’” (121). So, she is trying to warn Meilin. Can Gerathon control the animals, too? I mean, she can control the humans that control their spirit animals, but can she control the animals directly? I’m pretty sure she can-

Chapter 13

“‘Has anyone ever told you that your trust issues are all over the place?’” (124). Yeah, get her, Rollan.

“Lenori was on the beach . . . ” (124). Where has Lenori been all this time?

“‘Kalani is a wise and strong queen’” (125). Isn’t she sixteen?

“She looked straight at Abeke. ‘That’s the person who killed my father’” (127). She is in for a surprise. Also, she was good with Abeke in the last book? In one of the previous books, she makes an effort to not let her distrust for Abeke show outward.

“Rollan found himself appreciating the fact that at least his spirit animal had a face” (129). LOL.

“‘I fear that something awful is about to happen’” (132). Heavy hand with the foreshadowing there.

Rollan’s carpet memory with his mom . . . awww.

“He wondered if he and his friends would survive long enough to see a day when they could just enjoy a place like this . . . ” (138). Really, this needs to happen. Canonically.

“‘Float there unhelpfully like a wet piece of silk if the answer is yes’” (140). HA. Also, she should’ve switched that to no.

“‘I’ll go first,’ he offered” (141). So Rollan was scared to get onto the Kingray, but he’s willing to be the first to go into a giant hole?

Chapter 14

“The wolf sniffed at the tentacle and sneezed . . . ” (143). This kind of reminds me of the line in Fire and Ice. Parallels?

“‘Remember the tall ones from last time?’” (144). What is Mulop referring to? What humans? Conquerors from the First Devourer War?

“ . . . being the only underwater Great Beast” (145). But the Great Beasts had to migrate to the Evertree, which is in the middle of Nilo . . . how did Mulop . . . ?

Mulop’s question-answer talking is so funny.

“‘I thought the war was the Devourer’s idea, and Kovo and Gerathon were just helping him’” (148). Yeah, I thought that, too. I really don’t remember anything, do I?

“‘Kovo wanted to rule Erdas. Why?’” (148). I kind of wish easter eggs about why Kovo did what he did were planted while writing this series, instead of Kovo just pacing in his cage muttering about how he wants to crush the human race. Also, he’s a Great Beast. Doesn’t he already kind of rule, in a way?

“‘We also guard the secret of the bond between humans and spirit animals. That is the source of power’” (148). The Evertree???

“‘Very few still remain with their Great Beasts. Tellun’s. Cabaro’s. And mine’” (149). Didn’t Olvan say that the four fallen’s and Kovo and Gerathon’s talismans went missing after the First Devourer War? The Conquerors have Gerathon’s, obviously, but where are the others, then?

“‘It is a terrible thing,’ said Mulop. His deep green eyes bored into Meilin’s. ‘You will wish you had been kinder, little warrior’” (152). So Great Beasts can sense the Bile? Also, why didn’t Mulop, just, like, tell them that Meilin had taken the Bile?

Chapter 15

“‘Essix would have warned me if we were being followed’” (158). Only if Essix knew.

“‘Plenty of boats to carry us straight to Stetriol and into the hands of the Devourer. Aren’t we lucky’” (159). LOL.

“She could see at once that the enemy had planned for this attack . . . ” (159). Okay, so step one: Gerathon looks through Meilin’s eyes. Step two: she . . . tells the Conquerors??? How??? Isn’t she in Stetriol? It’s not like she can send messages? Or does she control them instead of telling them???

“Zerif tucked the Iron Boar back into his shirt, still grinning smugly. Abeke wanted to smash something. Ideally his face” (163). I personally think we should allow Abeke this basic human right.

“A heartbeat later, Essix dropped from the sky and drove her talons and beak at the Conqueror’s face” (164). GO FOR THE TALISMAN, ESSIX! THE TALISMAN.

Chapter 16

Oh, here it is.

“Abeke was taller, but Meilin knew ways of holding people that made it almost impossible for her to break free” (168). Does that mean that Gerathon can only work within a person’s arsenal of skills? Can she force someone to fight if they don’t know how?

“It’s me. I’m the mole” (168). *dramatic music*

“Did my father do this to me?” (168). If he did (he probably did), then he quite literally got himself killed. He tricked Meilin in drinking the Bile → Gerathon can see through Meilin’s eyes → the Conquerors swarm the Lake of the Elephant → General Teng is killed.

Also, why? Why did he want Meilin to have a spirit animal so badly? It is mentioned that Meilin’s mother and all four of Meilin’s grandparents had spirit animals. Maybe he felt isolated and didn’t want his daughter going through the same thing?

Also, how did he even get Bile??? Where did it come from??? Why was he just willing to give it to his daughter? So many unanswered questions . . .

This is referred to several times throughout the chapter as a “betrayal”. But it’s not??? It’s not even close??? Betray is defined as “to treacherously reveal information or secrets”. Meilin did none of the above. So this isn’t a betrayal.

The only person doing anything evil is Gerathon, who they already knew was bad. Obviously, that doesn’t make it any less devastating, but it’s not a betrayal. Thank you for coming to my TedTalk.

“Jhi was being controlled by Meilin exactly the way Meilin was being controlled by Gerathon right now” (170). Which allows room for some level of resistance, right? Also, it feels like they made Meilin ridiculously toxic in this book in particular to foreshadow this. She was less toxic before this and barely toxic at all in the first book.

“ . . . it would only take a moment for Rollan to switch talismans . . . ” (172). Can you not use more than one at a time?

“I’m the mole . . . I’m the reason the Conquerors are winning the war. I’m the reason they’ve always been able to find us; it’s my fault they have the talismans they stole from us. It’s my fault my father is dead” (174). Literally none of those things are her fault. They’re really all her father’s fault. And again, referring to her as the mole is inaccurate.

Chapter 17

Again, saying Meilin is the mole is inaccurate.

“‘Why didn’t the Greencloaks protect her?’” (177). Honestly, yeah.

“‘I’m glad you guys are safe, too,’ Conor said . . . ” (178). Yeah, about that . . .

“Conor stared at him in disbelief, his green eyes wide and confused” (179). I think this is the first time we’re getting canon Conor eye color?

Okay question: couldn’t the Greencloaks have just stopped trying to collect talismans and instead focus on building their army for the war? Because so far, the Conquerors haven’t actually gotten the talismans themselves, just stolen them. They probably wouldn't have either, considering that the Great Beasts only gave theirs up because the four fallen were there. So if the talismans stay with the Great Beasts, neither side will get them and Kovo will never be freed?

Final thoughts and rating:

I like Kalani as a character and her insults are definitely top tier. Tangaroa and Ngaio are definitely my favorite bond thus far. I liked how Conor doubted Abeke in certain places then felt ashamed. It really made him feel more 3D and not like a perfect angel that trusts everyone, because in a situation like this, it’s a bit impossible. The author did a good job of conveying Nightshade Island, like I could picture it in my head, and I usually can’t do that very well. It wasn’t really the physical description itself that was so good, it was the way it made you feel that was done exceptionally. Sunlight Island’s cave system was really cool in my opinion, and I wish it could’ve been revisited at a later point in the series. I enjoyed Mulop’s personality a lot, it’s nice to see the Great Beasts show some character and really come to life. The plot twist was definitely pulled off perfectly, and was clearly foreshadowed with the sleepwalking and whatnot. I think Meilin’s devastation was written quite nicely. I enjoyed Abeke’s slow realization that her family was pretty abusive towards her. I also liked how Rollan’s mother and his feelings about it didn’t weigh the story down too much, only at critical points. A very good choice in terms of writing efficiently.

Meilin choosing to help the whales redeems her a bit, but I still think the way they decided to make her ridiculously toxic right before the reveal was a bit unnecessary. Meilin was definitely more toxic than needed in this book. Personally, I think they should’ve taken it down a couple notches. Mulop not just telling the four that Meilin had taken Bile was a questionable choice. I think easter eggs and hints toward Kovo’s true motive, stopping the Wyrm, should’ve been planted in this book instead of making him out to be this human-hating villain that is bent on ruling Erdas. Just small things, like Kovo perhaps worrying about a “mysterious ancient force” or justifications involving how he will “save Erdas”.

Rating: 8/10

#draeyem rereads spirit animals #against the tide #spirit animals series #spirit animals books #sa spoiler #abeke #conor #meilin #rollan #zerif #tarik #kalani

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let-them-read-fics · 3 years

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What Could've Been

Requested By Anon: "pls do a rosé or jennie imagine where the reader is into them but they just keep rejecting her. then they just cross the line one day and say hurtful things to y/n so the reader just ended up stopped pursuing them. then someone else (could be the other rosé or jennie also of yk what i mean) became interested in y/n and they get all petty and jealous yk djajdua,, COULD BE ANY ENDING HFHSHAU I'M JUST A REAL SUCKER FOR IMAGINES LIKE THIS TYSM"

Pairing: Love Triangle -- Jennie x Fem!Reader and Rosé x Fem!Reader

Word Count: ~ 7,333

Warnings / Misc. -- Angst, Pining, Rejection, Crying, Fluff

Disclaimer: This writing is a work of fiction, and no disrespect is meant for those mentioned herein.

A/N: ⚠️ Important ⚠️ Class, gather round -- we have some things to discuss. I'm not angry, just... disappointed. *dramatic music*

First off, I want to address something with asks: as I've stated before, there's no certain amount of time that any one request will take me. Sometimes I'm more inspired by one than others, and sometimes I legitimately lack the time or brainpower to write a piece that holds true to my standards.

Please, refrain from messaging me multiple times about a request. Once is fine, especially if it's been awhile since you first asked, but I'm doing my best to give you starving fans the content you wish to see, and that takes time.

To those of you who continue to be patient with me: I sincerely appreciate it.

Secondly, I hope you enjoy this. ♡ Happy Reading ♡

PS ~ Anon, I still love you. Now enjoy this fic or you're grounded.

PPS ~ It gets better as it goes on

🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤

"Thank you," you politely say to your driver, handing him some money before stepping out of the sleek black car and onto the sidewalk. The bottoms of your shoes crunch lightly as they come in contact with the concrete, steadily announcing your course towards the performance hall.

You let out a breath as you stand in the elevator, alone with your thoughts in the small space as it ascends.

Your hands nervously palm the fresh bouquets of flowers you purchased on your way here -- the girls just finished a comeback stage, so you've decided to surprise them and show your love. You spent time picking out a personalized batch for each of them, making sure to mix their favorite colors and types, but you went even further for Rosé: you hand picked a larger, special array, choosing them based on their meaning and how much you think she'll appreciate them. Over the years, you've made sure to note her favorite ones; that came in handy tonight, and the florist assisting you definitely appreciated your attention to detail.

Too chicken to go to her first, you decide to bring the other girls their gifts now and save Rosie for last. All of them are unwinding independently in their dressing rooms right now, enjoying some much needed alone time before coming back together later to celebrate.

"Jisoo-yah!" You sing-song, rapping lightly on the door. It's slightly ajar, but you still knock out of respect for her privacy.

In an instant, the door swings open to reveal a very happy unnie. "Y/N! I've missed you!" She nearly shouts, pulling you in for an eager hug. A surprised noise leaves her lips as her hands come in contact with the bundle behind your back, crinkling the plastic slightly in her excited state.

"I got you a present," you say, smiling softly. Jisoo can feel the way your cheeks raise up, brushing against the skin of her neck as your head rests there, and her heart melts. After pulling out of the embrace, she wiggles her eyebrows at you.

"Well? Let me see!" You do as she asks with a chuckle, pulling her bunch out of the hold of the rubber band that's keeping them all together. "I got your favorite." You grin, sticking them out for her to see. Her eyes widen at the sight, and she's touched by the kind gesture. Flowers aren't particularly unique in terms of what companies and fans send them, but seeing the effort you put in makes it incredibly special. She couldn't be happier.

"Y/N, you're the best." She presses a small kiss to your cheek as a thank you, and invites you in right after. Jisoo considers you to be one of the closest friends she has, so being apart hasn't been easy on her. You're the only person she's okay with venting and crying in front of, and she's been needing that lately. Sensing this, you pull a chair up to her vanity and let her fill you in on all the mayhem you missed out on during your time away, holding her hand for reassurance. When she gets a little frustrated, you rub her back gently, telling her to take her time.

Jisoo is beyond thankful for you, and that becomes more and more apparent the closer you two get. Times like these hold a special place in her heart and remind her of why she loves you so much. You truly are a great friend to have, and there's no one she'd rather have in her corner.

----

"Incoming! 3...2...1…" You call out, standing in front of Lisa's door, ready to knock it down and barge in. The greeting is an inside joke between the two of you, though neither of you know where its origins lie.

"Yah! Hold on!" She shouts, nearly tripping and falling from how quick she rushes to the door. You laugh at the sounds of chaos coming from inside, wincing slightly when a thud rings out. Hair slightly disheveled, she opens the door with a huff. "This had better be good, because I almost died."

Wordlessly, you reveal her present and smirk as the halfhearted scowl on her face disappears completely, giving way to a dopey grin. "You remembered?" She asks quietly, running her fingers over the petals of her all-time favorite flower. The fact that she sounds so shocked makes you sad -- not many people take enough time to notice the little things. They'd rather focus on profiting off of the girls' talents than actually caring enough to get to know them.

"Of course I did, Lisa. You're one of my best friends; how could I forget?" The maknae pulls you in for a meaningful hug, allowing the gesture to tell you all the things she doesn't know how to express. She's not always the best with her words, but she makes up for it with her actions.

"I really love you, dork. You know that?" She asks as she pulls away, ruffling your hair lightly. She cracks that smile that seems to make the world stop, and you just shake your head.

"You'd better. Your flowers were the most expensive!" You tease, dodging her when she reaches out to grab you for that one.

"Get back here!" She shouts, chasing you down the hall like a 5 year old, planning to get her revenge.

---

"Jendeukie, open up!" You squeal, pounding on her door while throwing a look over your shoulder. Lisa is dangerously close, ready to tackle you as she continues charging down the hall.

"Y/N?!" She exclaims from the other side of the door, clearly not expecting you to be here.

"Hurry!" You can hear footsteps eagerly rushing towards the door, and just as she opens it, disaster strikes.

Lisa's arms wrap around your waist, pushing you forward and right into Jennie. The three of you fall into her dressing room in a messy heap, limbs splayed in various positions as you yell together on the way down. You manage to keep the flowers out of harm's way, thankfully, and your arm remains stuck out just in case Lisa tries anything else.

"Hello to you, too, Y/N." Jennie groans with a chuckle, the words coming out a little strained from all the weight on her. Lisa stands first, pulling you up right after, and you turn to help your best friend up as well.

"I sure know how to make an entrance, huh?" Your lopsided grin makes Jennie weak in the knees, much like it has ever since she met you all those years ago, and she has to fight to contain the blush that rises to her cheeks. After bantering with Lisa for a few more moments you eventually push her out of the room, shoo-ing her back to her own in order to give yourself some one-on-one time with Jennie.

You stick your tongue out at the maknae one final time before shutting the door and turning around, finding a very soft looking Jennie peering back at you. Her cheeks are pulled back in her signature gummy smile, and the fluffy sleeves of her Chanel sweater engulf her small hands as she cradles her face in them.

Perhaps, if circumstances were different, you'd be hopelessly pining for this 5'4" angel instead of Rosé. Love knows no logic, though, and you're stuck chasing after a certain Australian beauty that never seems capable of giving you the time of day.

"I missed you," she pouts, pursing her lips adorably as she steps forward to wrap her arms around your shoulders. You pull her in and pick her up with a spin, smiling into her neck when she giggles in your ear.

"Well, I'm here now. And luckily for you…." you start, allowing for some anticipation to build, "I come bearing gifts. Well, a gift. Singular." Jennie chuckles at your rambling -- it's one of the traits she finds most endearing about you, and she always hates it when people cut you down for it. It's adorable in every way.

"Oh?" She asks, intrigued as she raises an eyebrow -- she's keeping the act up for you, of course, too fond of the cute smile on your face to tell you that she already knows what it is. You hand over the flowers with a little jig, too excited by how happy she looks to contain yourself.

"They're beautiful, Y/N." She stops herself from adding a, "just like you," to the end of the phrase, wishing she was able to say things like that. You deserve to be reminded of how special you are everyday, and she knows her bandmate fails to do so.

"So, what've you been up to?" You amble over to the couch that's tucked away in the corner of her dressing room, plopping down onto the cushions with a small bounce. Rosé's flowers lay beside you, and Jennie eyes them.

"Same old, same old," she says, finally looking back at you with a tiny grin. "Practice for the comeback has kept us really busy lately, and somebody hasn't been there to tell us jokes at 3AM and keep us going." She playfully rolls her eyes, pretending to be annoyed.

"My most sincere apologies," you hold a hand over your heart in mock regret, bowing your head with closed eyes. "On the bright side, though, I'm back in town for next month or two. I finished the business deals we had to handle abroad, so now I'm all yours."

She knows you didn't mean hers, but that doesn't stop her from pretending.

A happy noise of approval slips past her lips, and she claps excitedly. The sight reminds you of some of the childhood videos she's shown you, the two looking eerily similar to one another. No matter what may happen in her life, Jennie will most certainly remain that innocent young girl at heart, getting scared by everything that moves and loving with her all. She's an amazing person to know, and part of you feels sorry for everyone who'll never get the privilege of knowing her personally -- after all, everyone deserves a Jennie Kim in their lives.

"Are you celebrating with us later?" She asks from in front of her mirror, now brushing her hair to busy herself. She runs the risk of making her feelings too obvious if she doesn't keep herself occupied.

"I was planning to, yes. But that might depend on Rosé." You inform with a nervous chuckle, an anxious smile playing on your lips. When you look up and find her brows furrowed, you elaborate.

"I'm gonna try to ask her out today when I bring her these flowers." You lightly chew your bottom lip out of habit, rubbing your hands together. The mere thought of such a task is daunting, especially with your not-so-perfect track record when it comes to her. You still try to cling to what little hope you have squirreled away in your heart, wishing with all your power that your sweet present will convince Rosé to at least give you a chance.

Distracted by your thoughts, you don't notice the way that Jennie's face falls. Her heart is breaking in silence, splintering into pieces far too small to put back together. She knew this day would come eventually, given that you're a determined person and head over heels for Rosé, but that doesn't mean she was prepared to find out like this. The lovesick glimmer in your eye hurts Jennie even more, knowing that you're probably imagining what it would be like for her to say yes to you. This whole time, Rosé has been stringing you along -- giving you just enough hope to keep coming back to her, using your devoted acts of kindness selfishly -- and Jennie would do anything to make you see that. You don't deserve what she puts you through.

"...Earth to Jennie!"

The brunette snaps back to reality and clears her throat, attempting to gather her thoughts again.

"Sorry, just got lost there for a second." She says, looking back into your eyes after a moment. A curious look plays in them, and she can practically see you debating on whether or not to question her further. She lets out a quiet sigh of relief when you accept her answer, choosing instead to smile at her.

"It's alright. But what's not alright, is that I've been sitting here for 5 minutes and you haven't come over to cuddle me. I mean seriously, a girl's gone for forever and her best friend doesn't bombard her with love?" You shake your head with an amused smile, throwing your hands in the air.

Oh, the things she would do to change that title.

Successfully suppressing the pang of longing that runs through her, Jennie quips back, "A month and a half is hardly forever, Y/N."

"It felt like it, though. I missed seeing you."

She finds you pouting, your arms folded across your chest like a toddler, and her heart melts. Any amount of time without you is too long for Jennie's liking, and she's happy to know you missed her as well.

"Fine, I guess I can spare some cuddles." She pretends to be put out as she approaches you, really playing the part by huffing and looking uninterested. Inside, though, she's celebrating. She can't wait to hold you close again, even if it may lead to her hurting herself with the what-ifs and scenarios that play in her mind.

"Yay!" You shout, pulling her into your lap before laying your head on her shoulder. Her heart beats rapidly at the proximity, and she prays to every higher power in existence that you don't notice it.

She relaxes after a moment, releasing the tension from her muscles as she sinks into your embrace. It's warm and comforting, and she never wants you to let go. Her head rests on top of yours, and she's content just running her hands through your hair, feeling your calm breaths against her skin.

She's so in love it hurts.

-----

This'll convince her, you whisper to yourself, attempting to sound confident -- key word: attempting. If there's one thing you know about Rosé, it's that she loves to be difficult with you. You caught feelings for her years ago when you were first introduced to each other at a company event, and ever since then you've done nice things for her nonstop, hoping that she'd fall for you with time. The longer you wait, though, the more discouraged you get. Regardless, those times that she appreciates your efforts make up for all the rest, and you'd gladly take 100 instances of the "bad" in order to have even just one of the "good".

After taking a deep breath, you knock on the door a couple times.

A sigh can be heard, sounding like a complete 180 from the reactions of the other girls. The subsequent footsteps are heavy -- like she's dragging her feet, not even wanting to get up in the first place -- and they work to dishearten you a bit. Nevertheless, you imagine how happy she'll be when she sees the surprise, and a small smile makes its ways onto your lips. All you want to do is brighten her day, if only for a moment.

An indifferent expression rests on her face when she first opens the door, likely expecting someone else to be standing in your place. Not much changes when she realizes it's you, though a sliver of a smile does quirk up at the corner of her lips.

"Hiya Rosie," you greet sweetly, unable to contain how wide your smile grows at seeing her again. She makes you feel like a giddy school girl, and you can't decide if you love it or hate it.

"What's up?" She asks, more out of common courtesy than anything else. Her body leans against the doorframe, her left arm resting behind the door. She didn't throw it open or invite you in like the other girls, so that tells you that she probably doesn't want visitors.

When you take too long to answer, she asks dryly, "Are you just gonna stare at me?" Her voice is laced with a slight undertone of annoyance -- one that makes you shrink down a bit. You can practically hear how exhausted she is, and part of you feels bad for disturbing her with your presence.

"N-no, sorry." You curse yourself for looking like a fool. "I got you something that I think you'll enjoy." Her eyebrows raise slightly and you can tell she's intrigued, even if she may try to deny it.

"Here." You declare, nervously fixing the plastic as you hold the bundle in front of you. You want it to look perfect for her.

"I, uh, hand picked it."

"Thank you, it's lovely." She says politely, taking them from you and bringing them up to her nose. She admires the gentle, pleasant scent of them, and smiles appreciatively at you.

You blush under her gaze, slightly tripping over your words as you respond, "Of course, I'm glad you like it."

Now, the part you dread: when the conversation dwindles down, threatening to end entirely unless you step up to keep it going.

"Well, how've you been?" You cringe at the overused question, but you're willing to employ it in order to hear her sweet voice for a little longer.

"Look, Y/N, I really appreciate the gift and all, and I'm really happy to see you again, but I don't feel like talking right now. I just want to enjoy myself for a little bit." Her denial makes you scrunch your face up, embarrassed beyond belief as her words sink in. You should've known that flowers wouldn't suffice. Perhaps that last line stung the most -- you try not to read too far into it, but the idea that she doesn't enjoy herself when talking to you nags at your heart.

"Yeah, yeah. For sure." You scratch the back of your neck, awkwardly taking a step away from her door and back into the hallway.

"I'll see you at the get together later though, right?" You ask, kicking yourself when you realize how hopeful you sounded. You have to get better at hiding it.

"Sure," she nods, sending you a smile and little wave before saying goodbye and shutting the door.

Well, that was a bust. Damn. Back to the drawing board, it is -- though your ego will need a few hours to recover.

---

"Lisa, I swear to god, if you come near me with that I'll punt you across this room."

Your very serious, totally-not-exaggerated warning evidently worked against you, because the maknae soon raises her head to look at you, grinning like a maniac. Frosting from the cake she just messily cut into covers her hands, looking threatening as she wiggles them at you.

"I mean in!" You shout as a last resort, slowly backing away. You accidently bump into Jennie in the process, but you fail to realize that it was part of the plan all along: she and Lisa are in cahoots. When the maknae lunges, swiftly striding across the room towards you, you attempt to move out of her path and get somewhere safer. Steady hands on your waist keep you anchored in place, though, and you try to fight them.

"Jennie?! Let me go, she's right there!" You squeal, trying to pry her fingers off of your hips one by one. She merely laughs, whispering a sorry into your ear right before Lisa's hands run across your cheeks and neck. You squirm, leaning further back against Jennie to evade the younger girl as she does her worst.

Now, practically having a face mask of frosting, you step away from the girls and glare at them.

"Bullies, I tell you." You say to Jisoo, groaning when she busts out laughing. It doesn't take a genius to know that you look a mess, and you'd probably laugh at yourself if the roles were reversed. The others soon join in, and a chorus of belly laughs fill the air around you.

"Go ahead, laugh it up," you tell the girls, nodding your head, "Just wait til I get my revenge. I'm coming for you, Manoban." You point a finger at her as you exit the room, grinning when you hear the oooo's that they let out at your threat, and you make your way to the bathroom at the end of the long hallway before you.

On your way back, you hear Rosé's voice filtering in from one of the lounge rooms that branch off of the main corridor. Intrigued, you stop walking and listen in.

Big mistake.

Your ears perk up when you hear your name roll off her tongue, though her subsequent sentences crush your spirits.

"...I know, right? She's honestly so annoying. Like earlier, I was finally getting cozy after our performance and then she just showed up."

Too shocked to leave now, you stay where you are and try not to let her words hurt you too much. She listens to the person on the other end of the line, laughing at something they said. That sound -- one you’ve grown to love more than anything else in the world -- is turning into something you hate. It feels like she's laughing at you; which, in hindsight, she probably is.

"Exactly! She had flowers for me, as if I don't get those almost everyday already, and I guess she really thought that that would win me over. It was sweet but, c'mon, you know?"

Every insecurity you have is nagging at you, and you can't stop the few tears that roll down your cheeks at her brutal honesty. She's really hurting your feelings, and you can't help but want to call her out for it. So, you do just that: you step into the open room, one that lacks an actual door, and say, "Next time you wanna talk shit about someone, maybe you should make sure they're not around to hear it."

Her smile falters slightly, and she spins around to face you. A hint of guilt plays on her features, but you're sure it's only because she got caught -- she definitely meant everything she said.

"Y/N--"

You don't stick around to listen to what she has to say. Her change of behavior surprised you, and you can't trust that she's even sorry for it.

Your pace quickens as you hear her voice become clearer -- she's in the doorway now, calling after you, but you don't even turn around. The salt of your tears greets your tongue, and you're once again reminded to wipe your face as you rush down the hall, rounding a couple corners and darting past countless doors on your way. You just want to get out of this place and be alone.

A new voice slows your strides as it greets your ears, feeling like a security blanket in its gentleness. It's Jennie. "Y/N? Why are you crying?" She came to look for you when you took too long to return from the bathroom.

You're far too embarrassed to look at her, so you simply sniffle and raise a hand up in her direction. "Don't worry about me, Jen. It's not important."

"Hey, yes it is. You're upset and that matters." She steps towards you, saying the words that you had no idea you needed to hear so badly. Your heart aches, still shocked by the fact that Rosé would say such things about you. You thought you were friends, if nothing else, and yet that's never felt further from the truth than it does right now.

When you don't move away, Jennie takes that as a sign to bring you into her arms, cradling your head against her chest. The kind act hurts your heart more for some reason, and you want to pull away. Jennie senses this and decides to rub soothing circles on your back, her warm embrace comforting you as she says, "I don't know what happened, Y/N, but I'm right here. We don't have to talk about it if you don't want to, either, but please don't leave like this. I hate to see you upset."

Something about the way she's holding you, so close and tenderly, is comforting beyond belief and you can't find the desire to leave anymore.

"Can we at least go to your dressing room? I don't want everyone to see me like this."

"Of course, sweetheart. Come on."

Sweet phrases of reassurance are whispered to you as she leads you away, keeping you safe from prying eyes the entire time. Jisoo appears in the doorway of the party room, raising a concerned brow when she sees the two of you approaching. Jennie shakes her head at the unnie before she can utter a word, giving her a silent answer as she uses her eyes to communicate what's happening. Jisoo eventually understands, and she offers a sympathetic nod when you pass by.

-------

7 Months Later

"Hey Jennie, do you think you can go answer the door? I'd do it myself, but…" Jisoo trails off, glancing down at the bowl of partially mixed dough that sits in front of her on the counter. Her hands continue to knead the mixture as she looks up at the younger girl, subtly sighing in relief when she agrees.

There's more than one reason behind having Jennie be the one to answer it.

The brunette grabs a pen as she pads her way over to the door, ready to sign for a delivery package -- that's usually the only thing they get at the dorm, considering guests are discouraged for the most part. Screw YG and their rules.

Being a bit clumsy, Jennie accidently knocks her phone out of her own hand as she opens the door, muttering out a quiet “shit” as she bends down to retrieve it. Her eyes trail over to the stylish boots that set just a few feet away, and her breath hitches.

"Hi baby." You greet with that healing smile that she's missed so much, peering down at her with a look in your eye that makes her heart trip and stumble over itself.

"Y/N!" She shrieks, jumping up from the ground and right into your arms.

"Uumph--" you let out in surprise, making sure to catch her and prevent her from falling. Ever since you two began dating a few months ago, leaving has become harder and harder. Jennie is beyond thrilled to have you back again, and she tries not to think about the next business trip you'll have to take. It's a methodical rhythm -- a month or two abroad and the same amount back home, then you're left to repeat the cycle over and over. Both of you hate it, and you'd much rather spend all your time with her instead. After all, ever since the incident with Rosé all that time ago, Jennie has steadily worked her way into your heart and become someone you can't live without. You were close before, but you've reached a new level now -- and that's about the only thing you can thank Rosé for. By hurting you and showing you how little she cared, she effectively pushed you right into Jennie's waiting arms.

"I'm so happy you're home." She says with a sigh, truly grateful to have you in her arms again. You wrap your arms tighter around her waist and sway a little bit, both of you content with just holding each other for a while longer. The weather outside is dazzlingly perfect; signs of summer apparent in everything around you. Birds chirp their looping songs as they fly through the air, feeling the sun's gentle heat on their wings all the while.

You move your head enough to be level with hers, bringing her in for a long-overdue kiss. She smiles into it, cupping your cheek with one of her hands as she languidly moves to deepen it.

Rosé should've stayed in her room. She should've ignored her stomach's incessant grumbling for a snack; but she didn't.

She gave in, and now she's stuck, rooted in place as she watches Jennie kiss you, the one that got away. It's like watching a train wreck: she can't look away, and part of her psyche knows she deserves this. The apple in her hands is the only thing working to distract her, and she grips it tightly within her clutch to comfort herself. You look good -- so good -- and Rosé doesn't know whether to be happy or not. She knows she didn't treat you right -- then or ever -- but for some selfish reason that she doesn't dare give voice to, she wants you to still be hurting. She wants you to be suffering like she is now, crying into your pillowcase at night when she crosses your mind. She wants you to miss the good times, though there may not have been enough of them, and she wants you to want her again.

You've turned the tables on her, and she doesn't know how to cope.

She realized what she had once it was gone -- once you were gone, too busy falling in love with Jennie to pay her any mind anymore. She misses how devoted you were to her and how much care you put into everything you did; she misses the consistency that you offered; she misses every sweet thing you ever did for her. Hell, she even misses hearing you ramble and seeing you blush when all she did was smile at you.

But you're gone now, destined to be with her member when all she wants is another chance. She'll never get it, certainly not after everything she's put you through, and she resents herself for treating you so badly. All you ever did was care, and she was too self-centered to give a crap.

She deserves this. She deserves to see you happy with Jennie, happy in a way she could never make you. For you, she deserves to hurt; to silently cry in her room when she hears the two of you on call, laughing about whatever new thing you experienced that day. Because it wasn't just the one instance of pain she inflicted on you; it wasn't just that one night at the performance hall -- it was a steady build up of rejection and half-assed excuses, and even she can't blame you for getting tired of it. She wishes she hadn't been so stupid to deny you.

What's worse is that she's actually fallen for you now; she imagines what could've been, what would've been, had she given you an honest chance. She's never tried to deny how gorgeous you are -- that's a given -- but now you're bruisingly beautiful, shining with the happiness that Jennie's worked hard to instill in you again. Shining with the love you hold for that 5'4" angel.

Maybe, if circumstances were different, you'd be in Rosé's arms right now. Perhaps in another life.

---

"Do you want to come in? Jisoo's working on some dessert for the lunch we just made. We can heat you up a plate in the meantime…" Jennie trails off, hoping to persuade you. She knows it's risky, considering the tension that feels almost tangible anytime the three of you are together, but she doesn't want to let you go so soon.

"I don't know…" The uncertainty in your voice is clear, and Jennie watches as a slight grimace crosses your features when you look past her and into the dorm. Luckily Rosé had already found the will power to move to the dining room, so you're spared from seeing her just yet.

"If things get weird or uncomfy we'll leave, okay? I promise." She says, knowing she's convinced you once you give her a little nod.

"Okay. But I'm only doing this because I missed Jisoo's cooking." A playful glint shimmers in your eye as you quirk your head to the side, teasing her.

"Hey!" She groans, pushing your shoulder as the two of you walk down the little concrete path that leads to the front door. "I'm kidding! I missed Lisa's jokes, too."

You laugh at the gasp she lets out, and you make sure to turn around and press a kiss to her temple to stop her from pouting.

"So, Y/N, where did you go this time?" Jisoo asks, leaning against the marble island of the kitchen as she pops a piece of tanghulu in her mouth. The crack of the sugary coating pulls your attention away from Rosé, where it had momentarily been -- she looks awful. Bags rest underneath her eyes, her normally vibrant features crestfallen now as her gaze scans across the food on her plate.

You look at Jisoo as you answer her. "The states. We worked with some local companies and small businesses to get more promotional material out in front of people. It's actually pretty amazing, guys -- you're blowing up over there. They love you." The girls smile at your words, feeling a sense of accomplishment swell within themselves. Back when they were trainees they never imagined that they'd end up this far, and yet here they are, seeing their dreams come true, day after day.

You're just happy to be along for the ride. It's not easy by any means -- people often crack under the pressure and get discouraged by the hustle and bustle of everything that such a major operation entails -- but you've never been more thankful for a position in your life.

"As they should," Lisa smirks, looking self-assured with the little cocky motion she does. You almost choke on the piece of food you just stuffed in your mouth, laughing at how ridiculous she looks.

After successfully not dying, you look at her and shake your head. "Lisa, what is wrong with you?" She puts on her infamous meme face, pretending to be shocked by your question, and you cackle again. The sound makes Rosé jealous; she wishes she were the one making you laugh like that.

Another hour or so passes with the 5 of you just relaxing and snacking together at the table, taking turns trading stories and jokes in the meantime. After finishing your dessert and complimenting the unnie's cooking skills, you make your way towards the kitchen with a groan of, "I'm so full" thrown over your shoulder.

You begin washing the dishes, finding it only fitting seeing as they spent all that time preparing such a good meal. It's the least you can do. A smile tugs at your cheeks when you hear the door open, followed by light footfalls against the hardwood. Jennie.

Warm arms snake around your waist as she hugs you from behind, resting her cheek against your back. Your brows furrow when you notice an unusual thing -- either Jennie grew a few inches in the last 5 minutes, or someone else is holding you. Their cheek reaches a place Jennie isn't tall enough to, and it all hits you.

It's Rosé.

You go to shut the water off and step away, but the sounds of her quiet sniffles give you pause. "Please don't." She whispers into your shirt, bunching the material up within her fingers against your stomach. A pang of sadness pulls against your heart strings, the long forgotten feeling reignited by the waver in her voice. "Rosé," you start with a sigh, ready to launch into the practiced speech of how happy you are with Jennie now and how you've moved on. She tugs at your shirt, slowly turning you around, and you can't find it in yourself to break her heart even further in this moment. Her eyes are filled with what tears have yet to stream down her face, brimming with the salty liquid you hate to see.

Even after everything, you can't stand to see her cry.

So, perhaps stupidly, you allow her to lean forward and rest her head against your chest; you let her fall into your arms, sinking into the embrace she never intended to miss so much.

It was innocent. Completely, utterly innocent, but Rosé couldn't stop herself -- not when you were there again, right in front of her, looking so good it hurt. She wrapped her arms around your neck, pushing her lips against yours in a kiss you weren't prepared for at all. Her mouth moved quickly against yours, knowing you'd be shoving her away at any moment. But she was okay with being selfish again -- she needed you then, and you allowed her to keep kissing you until you realized what was happening.

As you go to stumble away and put distance between the two of you, the door once again opens; only this time, it's actually Jennie. Her eyes immediately dart between the two of you as she notices how Rosie's hands are still holding you close, both of your lips swollen from the kiss. All at once you realize how the situation must look, and you begin panicking. You knew this was a bad idea from the start.

"Jennie, no. I promise this isn't what you think." You shake your head, finally freeing yourself of Rosé's grip as you take a couple steps towards your girlfriend. She takes an equal amount back, scoffing lightly at the memory of the scene she just witnessed.

"Yeah, okay," she says, sounding anything but convinced as she makes her way towards the door. You go after her, but she holds a hand up -- after knowing her for so long, you've learned that that signal means to give her some time alone. Both of you know you'll go after her again later, but she needs some time right now. As she leaves the dorm, the heavy sound of the door shutting is the only noise that cuts through the palpable tension.

"How could you do that?" You ask, voice small, not even turning around to look at Rosé. You doubt that she's even sorry.

She isn't sorry. At least, not for kissing you. It felt good to have you like that, and she doesn't regret it. However, from what angle of your face your side profile offers to her, she can see how upset you are. That's what makes her feel the slightest bit guilty for her timing.

"I spent so much time trying to get you to notice me, and now you choose to do that? You're unbelievable, Roseanne-- I'm finally happy, and what, you want to ruin that?” She takes the blows as they come, staying quiet. “If you've ever cared about me at all then you'll stay away." You set your jaw, willing the tears to go away. You've wasted too many on her, and you'll be damned to look weak right now.

"Y/N, I-"

"No. Don't apologize when we both know you don't mean it. You've always been selfish, Rosé." You bite back, not caring if the words cut her down like her old ones always used to do to you. Earlier, before her little stunt, you were starting to feel sorry for her; clearly though, that was yet another mistake on your part.

You leave without another word, praying that she doesn't further complicate the situation by following after you. Jennie is the only thing on your mind as you hop in your car, having an idea of where she might be.

"Jennie, no. I promise this isn't what you think."

Your worried voice replays in her mind for the millionth time, further tormenting her. She's been cheated on before, so that phrase isn't a new thing to her.

She was always afraid this would happen. She used to lay awake at night, overthinking as usual, wondering when the beautiful thing the two of you created would ultimately come crashing down. It was too good to be true, and she curses herself for foolishly believing any different.

The better part of an hour passes by as she sits on the park bench, reminiscing on all the memories you've made here. The idea of ending things with you and starting over with someone else sinks in, and she hates the feeling. She only wants you -- she's only ever wanted you -- and the thought that things could really be over now hurts her more than she cares to admit.

Your eyes scan across the park, ghosting over the playground equipment until they zero in on her, sitting near the fountain that you shared your first kiss. Such a sap, you smile bittersweetly.

You ruffle through the plastic bag that sits in the passenger's seat, moving the receipt out of the way so that you can pick up what you're really after. Returning your hands to the steering wheel, you grip it while giving yourself a little pep talk before exiting the car. You press a kiss to the present in your hand for good luck, hoping this encounter will go well.

Water spouts from the top of the fountain, the sound growing louder the closer you get to Jennie. Her back is turned to you, and for that you're thankful -- you're not quite prepared to see how she'll be looking at you. Now just a few feet away, you say, "Marry me."

You’ll do whatever it takes to show her how crazy you are about her.

Her head whips around, completely taken aback by your proposal. She thinks that there's no way you're serious, but when she looks down to find her favorite flavor of ring pop in your hand, her eyes widen. You're sick of wasting time, and seeing that she hasn't yelled at you or turned you away yet, you take advantage of the situation.

"Marry me, Jennie," you repeat, taking small, careful steps towards her until you're right next to the bench. "She kissed me, but I tried to push her away. I told her that you're the only one for me."

She blinks, taking in your words as she notices you nervously toy with the plastic wrapper of the candy. She knows you're telling the truth; you're a terrible liar, and you wouldn't be here right now if you didn't want her back. If you wanted to choose Rosé over her, you had the perfect opportunity to do so back at the dorm.

But you don't; you want Jennie, and now you're standing in the middle of your favorite park, proposing with a piece of candy to prove that to her. The things you do for love.

"It just scared me, Y/N. Seeing her wrapped around you like that--"

"I know, baby. I know. But I promise I didn't want it, and it meant nothing to me. I'm so in love with you, Jennie Kim."

She smiles at the dopey grin on your face, seeing how smitten you are.

"Okay," she answers back, yet again looking at your hands.

"Is that a yes?" You ask, slowly beginning to tear open the wrapper.

"Yes, dummy. I'll marry you." She declares, nodding her head with a laugh at how slow you are sometimes.

"Yay!" You shout, stepping forward to pick her up in your arms. You set her back down with a smile, slipping the ring onto her finger as your heart soars.

Jennie kisses you, letting the action convey all the emotions she's been through in the past few hours. "I love you." She sighs, resting her forehead against yours.

"I'd surely hope so, jagi," you smirk against her lips, giggling at the squeal she lets out when you playfully pinch her side. Her kisses are replacing all traces of Rosé, and she's comforted by the fact that you'll so adamantly choose her, everyday.

With a smile, Jennie realizes something: never again will she be forced to dream of having you in another life -- her wishes came true, and now she'll have you in this one, always.

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lilith-of-rivia · 3 years

Text

The Bards Sister Geralt XFemale!Reader Part 1

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

Masterlist

Summary: Geralt of Rivia and his long time travel companion Jaskier find themselves in Jaskiers home land. A place geralt had not only never seen nor heard of. Jaskier is ready to reunite its his family after traveling and exploring the world for 20 years. The one person he missed the most was his baby sister (Y/N). Who he hadnt seen since she was 5. The journal is long, but the pay off is grander then they would ever be able to predict. I know i am trash at summaries.

Trigger warnings: NONE a lot of Geralt and Jaskier in this first part. Your charicter doesn’t come in till closer to the end.

Pairings: GeraltxReader JaskierxSister!reader

Word count: 6,095 longest fanfic I’ve ever written!!

A/N: hello my loves!!! I got my Insperation back!! I’m hopping i will be regularly posting agin!!! I ove you all so much you consistent love and supoort has not gone unnoticed. The constant likes and reblogs truly means the world to me. I love every single one of you so much. Thank you for believing in my writing the way you do. All my love -Lilith ps. I have reviewed and edited but I will be doing a more in-depth review soon!

“Where are we going, Jaskier.” The Witcher’s brooding voice echoed threw the flowered valley. His horse trotted not far behind his companion. Jaskier looked back at him and just rolled his eyes.

“How many times have you led me on endless roads, towards the middle of nowhere speaking little to no words to me no matter how much I ask?” Geralt said nothing. Jaskier snorted looking back towards the road.

“Exactly. No shut up, your brooding is giving me a headache.” The bard was giving the witcher a taste of his own medicine. The idea that Jaskier was leading him to somewhere he had no idea of the location, made him uneasy. Did he trust his bard? Absolutely without a doubt. Would he ever admit it to him? No never.

Their travels continued till the sun was barely hanging in the sky. The air had grown crisp replacing the harsh burning of the full summer sun. Jaskier pulled his mare to the side of the road, climbing off her, tying her to a tree. Geralt followed, realizing they were stopping for the day.

“We still have a couple hours of daylight left.” Geralt said as he took Roach’s saddle and tack off.

“We don't need a couple hours, we are nearly there. Maybe an hour and half.” Geralt cocked an eyebrow at Jaskier.

“Then why did we stop?” Jaskier pulled his saddle bags off his horse, putting them beside a log as he gathered some sticks for the fire.

“Because I have to debrief you as to who we are going to see and you must bathe before we do so. The stream here will do the trick.”

“Gods Jaskier, will you just tell me where we are going? The secrecy is bullshit.” The broot of a man was losing his patience with his friend.

The duo had been on the trip for nearly two weeks. They left Tramieria and headed east. Much further east than Geralt could ever remember traveling. Yet the bard seemed to know exactly what turns to take and when. The closer they drew to their destination the more the witcher could hear his heart beat faster.

“Jaskier if this is some stupid plot for me to protect you from some man who’s wife you slept with again-“

“It's not Geralt-“ Jaskier pinched the bridge of his nose, his stress causing a minor headache. “Just go bathe then I’ll tell you everything.” Geralt studied his friend, his eyes searching his face, his ears tuning into his heart beat trying his best to figure out what he was getting himself into.

With a low grunt the witcher grabbed his last set of clean clothes and the bar of soap from the bard's hand before stomping off to the river.

“Clean EVERYTHING!” Jaskier yelled over his shoulder. Only getting an unfriendly finger in return.

Nearly an hour later, the sun was completely hidden behind the canyon, the glow of the fire Jaskier started illuminating their small camp. Jaskier’s fingers strummed mindlessly at his lute, his eyes fixed on the stars that were making their presence known more, humming to himself softly. He heard his friends footsteps as he approached, his hair was wet at his shoulders. A fresh white Cotton tunic hugged his muscular build, black trousers hugging his legs. He smiled nice for once. All thanks to the lavender and honey soap Jaskier had received as a gift.

“Now don't you look better.” Jaskier said with a chuckle. The witcher sat down across the fire from him, his golden eyes staring heavily at the bard.

“Spill your guts Jaskier.” Jaskier rubbed his hands over his face and nodded. His eyes looking anywhere but at his friend.

“I haven't been completely forward about my family life.” Jaskier’s eyes landed on the moon above them. It was nearly full, he was doing well with time. He knew they would reach their destination well before the next full moon.

“Jaskier.” Geralt’s harsh voice broke the silence. With a loud sigh Jaskier finally looked his friend in the face.

“I’m royalty Geralt.” The Witcher’s expression did not change. He just looked at his friend. He could hear Jaskier's heart beat become uneven and unsteady. At first he thought it was a joke but the nervous energy radiating from his long time friend made him think better.

“My family, they are wonderful people. My mother, bless her, taught me everything I needed to know about writing and music. Convinced my father to let me train at Oxenfurt Academy. My father is a noble and loyal king. He served our people well. Still does to my knowledge. I haven't been back in nearly 20 years…” the bard trailed off, his eyes fixated on his hands, his fingers twildilling with a ring he had on. The ring was that of his family. Their crest engraved into the gold.

“I was never meant to be a noble. I lived for adventure, for more than just sitting on a throne and watching people come and go. I was never fit to be king. My parents knew that. They understood. Understanding people they are.” His voice trailed off again, hopping his friend would say something. Ask a question. Anything. He didn’t know where to go next.

“Why didn't you ever tell me?” Geralt finally asked.

“Because it never came up. My family never needed me. I never needed them. I love them all dearly of course. But we were never the closest people in the world. Well, my sister and I were.” That caught the Witcher’s attention. His eyes narrow slightly, he made sure to not let his expression scare the bard into not telling him more. He was genuinely curious about his family. But he couldn't lie and say he wasn't disappointed that in the 7 years they traveled together he never heard of them.

“You have a sister?” The bard's eyes lit up. His memory raced with images of his tun little sister chasing him around the courtyard screaming, yelling his name. Her giggles and laughs pulling at his heart strings.

“Yes. Her name is (Y/N). She is about to be 25. Big age for a princess. I havnt seen her since she was very little.” His heart started to break softly. His neglect to his baby sitter weighting heavily on him.

“I write her often, as much as I can. She was...well, a surprise to my parents to say the least. I was 15 when she was born. I left home at 20. I was only around for her toddler years. I never got to see her grow, blossom into a young woman. I missed so much.” Jaskier had to fight back the tears, his throat becoming tight and dry. His body filling with regret.

“I just kept pushing it back Geralt. I alwasy said I’d make it home. I alwasy had it in the back of my mind to go back and see her. But I never did.”

“Why now?” Geralt asked.

“She wrote me a few months back. It was nearly a book. It was filled with tales of her new travels around our country. She had been training heavily with an unmanned matester of combat. She traveled the countryside with the man. She referred to him as an uncle. In the letter she asked me if it was true that I’d been traveling with you. She said the songs and tales of Jaskier the Bard traveling with the White Wolf made it to her ears.” Jaskier stopped talking for a brief moment, rummaged around his rut sack and pulled out a notebook. He untied its string and a large pile of papers fell out into his hand. He unfolded the parchment and scanned the writing.

“I wrote her back that week. Only to receive this in return.” He began to read;

“Oh dear Jaskier!! I cannot believe its true. I thought he was only a legend. The white wolf. Please tell him he is a hero here. We love his stories. Many have written books of him. Children run round calling themselves the butcher of Blaviken here to save the damsel and distress. I love his stories, mainly because they involve you. Please come visit me this year. I miss you terribly. I want to hear of your travels with the wolf. Mother said he is more than welcome to stay if he wishes to travel with you. I do miss you Jaskier. More than I think you know. I do not mean to guilt you or make you feel bad as i know you are traveling the world to your heart's content and would never want you to feel as though I do not support you-“ Jaskier stopped reading for a brief moment. A small tear dripped onto the page he was reading. Geralt listened to every word he read. He couldn't help the small tug of his lips when he read about the children pretending to be him. It was a breath of fresh air for the witcher. He had constantly been told he was a monster. To hid your children from him. Yet here was an entire country that loved him, yet he had no idea. Jaskier cleared his throat and continued. “But i miss my brother. And maybe, just maybe. I could come with you. If you deem me fit. I have been working tirelessly with a friend of fathers. He trains me in not only swordsmanship, but Herbology, and monsters as well. I can name nearly every monster that has inhabited the Continent and how to slay it. He thinks I’m ready to leave the nest and I think mother and father are getting a bit tired of me as well. I cannot stand another somber, dull, dinner party with nobles who look at me like a piece of meat. So please. Visit me soon. Come and stay a few days. Catch up with your dear sister and maybe, if he isn't too busy and if it doesn’t inconvenience him, bring the Wolf with you. He’d be a welcomed hero. All my love dear brother. Xoxo Love always, (Y/N) Irene Pankratz

Jaskier folded the letter, placing it inside his notebook before safely storing it inside his sack again. He ran a hand over his face, his eyes slowly moving from his hands to his best friend. They sat in the silence for a while. Geralt’s brain replaying the words he had heard from his friend.

“You could have told me about her Jaskier. Why didn't you? You’ve been in contact with her all this time, planning to see her and your family again. Bringing me along for the ride, yet not a single word in 7 years. Do you not trust me with such a secret Jaskier?” Jaskier was taken aback by his friend's words.

He never knew his secrecy would have such an impact on his friend. When it came to Geralt he learned long ago, the little words, the better. The witcher can only handle so much before he loses interest and stops listening or walks away. He never in a million years would have thought he cared about his life that much. It warmed the bards heart to know his dear friend, the only brother he ever had, cared that deeply for him.

“It has nothing to do with not trusting you Geralt. Is has everything to do with the shame I hold for not seeing her sooner. For treating her like a dirty secret form the world. There is no logical reason for me to keep my family such a big secret. Yet I have. For 20 years.” Geralt’s hands rubbed together softly as he listened to his friend. He understood the secrecy. He was a box full of secrets that nobody could get into.

“Its okay Jaskier. I understand the secrecy. Is that where we are going tomorrow?” Jaskier nodded, a smile appearing on his face.

“Her birthday is the next full moon. I’m hoping my gift will be a good start in time lost.” Geralt looked at him curiously. He hadn't noticed any major item in Jaskier’s possession that could make a good gift for a young princess.

“You’re her gift Geralt. I wrote her back after that letter and told her I’d be back for her next birthday. But that you simply were to busy with your work. I told her that you greatly appreciated her support and that youd consider writing to her in the future. She has no idea your coming with me.” Geralt didnt know how he felt about being a gift. He never ever saw himself as a gift to anyone. More of a burden the a gift. He shook his head at Jaskier and tutted at him.

“Jaskier if your that broke you could’ve asked me for a few extra coins for a real gift.” The witcher attempted to joke with the bard. It made Jaskier smile more. Geralt could be funny, but his humor was incredibly dry, much like Jaskier’s father.

“Geralt! Did you just try and joke around with me??” Geralt rolled his eyes, laying down stretching his muscles as he looked up at the starts.

“Best get some sleep Jaskier, you’ve got a rather big family reunion tomorrow.”

The next morning Jaskier was up and awake before Geralt, a rare sight. He truly hadn't slept more than a couple hours that night. His nerves kept him awake. He feared his sister wouldn’t be as loving as he pictured, she had every right to be mad at him, hate him even. By the time Geralt was up, Jaskier had bathed, changed and had his horse completely ready to go.

Geralt had to do everything in his power to not laugh at his friend. He looked rather ridiculous. His normal bright attire was replaced with a royals outfit. A green and blue velvet tunic and some extremely uncomfortable looking black trousers. His hair was combed back and his face was freshly washed. He even cleaned under his fingernails. He looked rather ridiculous in Geralt’s opinion. He couldn't help the low chuckle that left his lips as he put his bed roll away.

“I don't understand why you're laughing. I have some clothes for you to put on as well.” Geralt’s expression changed instantly, from humorous to angry.

“No. Absolutely not. What I’m wearing is perfectly fine. I’d wear it to meet any king or queen.” A bag was chucked at him, he barely caught it before it smacked into his face.

“This isn't any normal king and queen Geralt. This is my family. And besides, you are no ordinary witcher in my kingdom, you’ll be treated as royalty there. You may as well look the part.” Geralt huffed and threw the bag of clothes back at his friends feet, glaring daggers at him. He hated dressing up with a burning passion. Everything was too tight, not easy to fight in. If anything happened he’d have to rip the seams on every piece of clothing to be able to maneuver his weapons properly. And fancy clothes dont have space for weapons. He didn't like that one bit. Jaskier looked at his friend. His eyes pleading with him.

“Please Geralt. Just for today and her birthday. I couldn't care less what you wear at any other point on this trip.” He had walked closer to Geralt now. About a meter away from him. He extended his hand, the bag in his hand. Geralt looked from the bag to his friend. His teeth and jaw clenched.

He let out a loud huff and grabbed the bag from the bard.

“Fine.” He said through gritted teeth and began taking off his clothing. Jaskier smiled before turning his attention to Roach, getting her stalled and tacked so when Geralt was dressed they could leave.

“If we move with a bit of a haste we could make it there before breakfast.” Jaskier said as he mounted his horse, looking at his friend. His hand slapped over his face. The witcher looked utterly ridiculous in his new attire. The bright red and orange vest a-top a cream tunic, his legs tight in some disgustingly ugly corduroy pants. The pants were obviously smaller than the seamstress he bought them off claimed them to be. The ends of the pants came nearly mid calf on Geralt’s legs. His pasty white ankles and feet shining in the early morning sun.

“Jesus Geralt. Those are worse than the ones I got for Pavetta’s party.” The bard could no longer hold in his laughter. Did Gerarlt look like a nobleman? Sure, but his size, white hair, and bright yellow eyes really didn't help the situation.

“Jaskier, I will kill you for this.” Geralt grumbled angered as he pulled his socks up his feet and over his calves. Luckily for him (and Jaskier) his boots went higher than his pants, making it harder to notice that the pants he was wearing were way too small.

“At least I’m not making you wear a big hat with a feather, those are truly hideous.” Geralt mounted Roach, more carefully then he normally does in fear his pants could bust at the seams.

“I had to wrap you up nice and pretty to present you to my sister.” Jaskier commented as he led his horse; Napoleon to the main road, Geralt and Roach in tow.

The two men rode in a comfortable silence for some time, but as they got closer and closer to Jaskier’s home, all Geralt could hear was his frantic heartbeat. Jaskier’s palms get sweaty and his throat dry, no matter how much water he drinks from his water skin.

“Jaskier. You need to calm down. Your fucking heart beat is driving me insane.” Geralt hissed. They could see the end of the valley they had been traveling in. Geralt looked out in the distance, his eyes saw the castle first. It was very far, but he could tell how beautiful it was from where they were.

“Maybe you just shouldn’t listen to it then.” Jaskier barked back.

“You know I have no control over it, idiot. Take a deep breath. I know you're scared, I understand. But from the sounds of it your sister desperately misses you, I don't think she would ask you to come see her if she was going to hate you.” Geralt didn't talk much at all, that everyone knew. He was a man of few words. But when he did speak it was wiser than most people ever expected. People tended to forget the age of the white haired man, as he stopped ageing physically in his late twenties.

Jaskier smiled softly at his friend's words, he listened to him and took a few deep breaths, calling himself down. Geralt was right. His sister seemed eager as ever to see him again.

The two men approached the entrance to the city. Geralt was more than shocked. He wasn't sure if he had ever seen a city so beautiful in his entire life. The streets were lined in beautiful stone, flowers, vines, greenery all around every corner. The banners that were hanging on the outside of the main gates caught Geralt’s eyes. The crests on them were brightly colored in greens and blues, a very large diamond in the center. Their horses rode into the entrance of the town. Jaskier’s heart was calm, steady, his face was bright and had a smile Geralt had never seen on him before. He was finally home.

“Welcome to Inritha (In-Rithe-A) the capital of Unthya (Un-The-A) Geralt. Welcome to my home.”

Their horses traveled down the stone brick road slowly, the city was buzzing already even with it being the early hours of the morning. Geralt was surprised to see everyone look so...happy, care free. Enjoying their lives. They looked as though nothing was a fret, no monster looming. Geralt was mesmerized by the city. The buildings were built out of what looked to him like limestone, a building material he so rarely saw in other parts of the Continent. The buildings were being taken over by vines and moss, flowers all over. He’d never seen so many butterflies in his life.

“Jaskier-'' his voice was barely a whisper, the bard turning to look at him as they rode side by side. Jaskier couldn't help but smile as his friend admired the beauty he himself had so easily forgotten over the years.

“I know, it's beautiful. I've forgotten myself.”

The two men continued riding their horses up the road closer and closer to the castle. The longer they road tho more attention they got from passer buys. Geralt could hear their whispers.

It couldn't be. Could it?

THE Geralt of Rivia? Here in Inritha?

Mummy look! It's the butcher!!

Has Prince Jaskier finally returned home?

For the first time in what seemed like his entire life, the hushed whispers Geralt heard as he rode through a city were not of hate and disgust. But of admiration and curiosity. The entire time Geralt and Jaskier rode through the city, he never once had the urge to grab either of his swords that were at his side.

The two men approached the gates of the castle, four armored guards stood outside. The put their hand up in motion for the men to stop. One who looked as tho to be the commander of sorts stepped forward poking between both men. Eyes lingering for a long while on the two.

“State your name and what business you have in Inritha at this early hour.” Jaskier dismounted his horse, waking a few feet forward.

“My name is Jaskier Alfred Pankratz son of Dastrill and Alvere Pankratz. This is my companion Geralt Of Rivia, we are here on behalf of my sister, (Y/N) Irene Pankratz’s 25th birthday.” Jaskier bowed his head lowly, keeping eye contact with the commander in front of him.

“Prince Jaskier?!?” The man clearly looked flustered and embarrassed for not recognizing the prince of his own kingdom. All four men quickly bowed their heads.

“Please accept my apology your highness, we welcome you home. As do we welcome your honored guest.” Jaskier smiled and told the men to not trouble themselves with an apology. Geralt continued to watch from atop Roach, still not use to being idolized instead of feared. Honored guest. Geralt thought to himself. He could get use to the new treatment. Jaskier remounted Napoleon the gates to the castle walls opening. The both road threw, all four men bowed their heads as the two walked threw. Not once did they threaten Geralt’s life. They were led by a guard to the stables where they left their horses.

Geralt could hear Jaskier heart beating again in his chest as they were led inside the castle. Geralt tried to concentrate on his friend, to be there for him but he couldn't help but let his eyes wander all over the castle's walls, it was a bright exterior. The walls polished, candles everywhere. Large windows allowing for natural lighting. Nothing dark or gloomy about the castle at all. He felt uplifted..cheary almost. As they neared the entrance to the grand hall where the King, Queen, Princess along with some others were. Geralt could hear the light conversation, and the clicking of silver on plates, they were eating breakfast. But he could still hear Jaskier’s heart beating in his chest. Geralt placed a comforting hand on his friend's shoulder as they walked, giving it a soft squeeze. The action made Jaskier more worried if the witcher was feeling alright, as it was abnormally out of character for the man. But he said nothing, appreciating the gesture.

They got to the door and just as the guard was about to push the doors open Jaskier grabbed his arm.

“Could we maybe skip the loud over dramatic announcements of my arrival? I have not seen my family in years.” The guard only nodded, bowed his head and walked back outside to his post. Jaskier looked over at his friend, as he put his hand on the door ready to push it open.

“Now or never.” Jaskier said as he opened the door. Both men walked into the large room, the talking stopped almost instantly. Geralt stood at the door, not wanting to impose on the important reunion of his friend and his family. He followed Jaskiers gaze to the table ahead of them in the front of the room. The room was lined with huge floor to ceiling windows, the light of the early morning sun shone brightly making the marble floors glisten.

“JASKIER!!!” The loud scream of a girl nearly made Geralt jump out of his skin, his hand reaching back for a sword that wasn't there in instinct.

It made Jaskier jump but the smile that covered his face was even bigger than the one he had seen as he walked through the city. Geralt followed Jaskier’s gaze to a young woman. The sight of her alone made Geralt want to pass out. He wasn't sure if he had ever seen someone so beautiful in his entire life. Her hair was the same chestnut brown that Jaskier had, but it was long, hip length. She had it pulled back slightly out of her face, a few baby hairs framed her face. Oh her face. Geralt thought as though he was looking at a living breathing angel. He heard her chair scrape roughly on the ground before it loudly crashed on the floor. She raced around the long table from her mothers side and sprinted to her brother. She practically threw herself on him. Her arms wrapped tightly around his neck. He quickly wrapped his arms around her, stumbling back a few steps. Everything was quite as the two embraced. Geralt's eyes went to the king and queen who were now standing. The queen looked just like (Y/N) but her hair was black, long stripes of grey peeking through her hair. The crown atop her head glistened in the light. Her right hand was tightly around her husband's arm, her other hand placed softly over her mouth as she looked at her children. Her husband looked much like Jaskier. His hair was the same color as both of their children, but much like his wife’s, much of it had turned grey. His eyes were the same cornflower blue that Jaskier had.

Minutes passed in silence before Jaskier put his hands on his sisters shoulders, pulling her away from him. He put one hand on her cheek as he examined her features. Her pale cheeks were damp with tears. But not sad tears. Tears of joy.

“My sister, how you’ve grown.” Geralt could hear the tears in the bard's voice. He couldn't see him but he could hear everything.

(Y/N) fingers gently brushed over her brother’s face as she smiled at him.

“My brother, how you haven't aged a day. You look just as I remember you. Maybe a few more wrinkles.” She teased. He laughed softly. Wiping his eyes with his hand before pulling her into another bone crushing embrace. She was much shorter than Jaskier, barely shoulder level with him. Geralt was shocked to remember she would be turning 25 in two days. She was still young in the face, beautiful. He wanted nothing more than to see her more up close.

While the siblings spoke their parents moved from the spots at the table, standing behind (Y/N). Alvere was the first to pull him into a tight embrace after her daughter let go. Her fingers gently combed through his hair as she inhaled his scent deeply.

“My dear son how I've missed you.” She whispers slowly into his ear. Geralt was starting to feel bad for eavesdropping. Not that he could help it. He was still standing at the entrance to the grand hall yet he could hear everything.

Jaskiers father hugged him next, it was not nearly as long as the outer two but both men were okay with it. Understanding that their relationship had never been one for long father son hugs.

“It is good to see you again my boy.” His hand clasped down on his son's shoulder.

The four of them stood close together, smiling more than Geralt ever thought possible. It almost made his heart turn. Deep, deep, deep, down the witcher longed for a family that would look at him the way they looked at Jaskier. He often cured the universe for not giving him an option when it came to what he had become. He clung to the few memories he had of his mother. But as years passed they became harder and harder to remember, more painful. But he had. Made a new sort of family over the years. From Jaskier, to his brothers at Kaer Morhen.

“(Y/N), mum, dad, there is someone I’d like you to meet.” Jaskier turned his head towards the door to the hall. Geralt stood tall, shoulders pressed back, his hair framed his face gracefully. Even in the entirely ugly attire he was in, he made himself as presentable and as proper as possible. (Y/N)’s eyes grew bigger when her eyes met his. He once again was taken aback by her beauty. Her eyes were a powerful emerald green matching similarly to the color of her brother's tunic, but brighter. Her mouth fell slightly agape when she realized who it was. The eyes were a dead give away that he was in fact a witcher, but once she saw the silver medallion that rested on his chest, she knew.

Jaskier nodded his head for Geralt to walk forward and he did, his footsteps were light, his pace slow and steady as he walked closer to the royal family. (Y/N)’s hand gently covered her mouth in excitement. Her eyes flickering to her brother who grinned at her.

“A bit of an early birthday gift.” He winked. Once Geralt was closer to the group Jaskier turned so he could introduce them, at his sister's side. All eyes were on him. Even the few people who were still seated at the table were looking at him. He started to feel a bit more uneasy. He started to remember how far away his swords were if he needed them. This alone was beginning to make him panic. He was not used to being welcomed into royal courts unless it was specifically for a hunt.

“This is Geralt of Rivia, one of the most feared, renowned, and skilled Witcher’s the content has to offer. And also my best friend.”

Geralt's eyes were back on (Y/N)’s, his worries dropped more when she smiled brightly at him. Her eyes gleamed.

Geralt bowed his head to the three of them, “ it is an absolute pleasure to meet you, your highnesses.” (Y/N) was nearly blown over by the sultry sound of his voice. She had only heard stories of the witcher. Never see him for herself and definitely had never heard him speak. She never expected a monster hunter to be as handsome as he was. She admired every feature he had. Her eyes fixating on his chiseled jawline, the light gray stubble across his chin and cheeks.

“My, what a pleasure it is to meet such a famed warrior as yourself Geralt!” The king spoke before (Y/N) could, which she was happy about as she did not trust her voice to not waver at his beauty in that moment.

“You my dear are very popular around here. Your stories are legendary. The school children even host yearly plays, Reenacting your most beloved stories.” (Y/N)’s mother added her finger pointing light hardly at Geralt. Her hand came out gracefully from her side to shake the Witcher’s hand. He gently took it, a small smile pulling at the corners of his lips. His attention returned to (Y/N).

“I’m terribly sorry I’m the birthday gift from your brother this year.” She shook her head almost as soon as the words left his mouth.

“Do not be sorry Geralt-'' the way she said his name made him feel as though he could keel over. “I would like to thank you, for protecting my brother for the years you have. He never skips on his gratitude for you in his letter to me. For that we are all eternally grateful for you.” She reached her hand out. Geralt wasted no time in grabbing her hand, shaking it gently. He was dying inside, but he couldn't let her or anyone else see. He took a gentle step towards her, his head lowering softly, his soft lips were placed on the back of her small hand. The small action made the young girls' faces burn red. Her eyes flicked to her brother who smugly smiled, knowing danm well his gift was going to take the cake.

“Well, you both should come join us, we just started eating.” The king said with a smile, with a quick wave of his hand two more places we set.

(Y/N) gently removed her hand from Geralt’s. Walking towards the table, both men in tow. As she reached her spot she moved her plate and glass to the middle seat that had been prepared, leaving Jaskier a seat next to their mother and Geralt a seat next to her. They all sat and waited as food was served to them. (Y/N) could feel Geralt watching her as she ate, her brother deep in conversation with her parents about his most recent travels. But she wasnt listening. Her attention was only on the man seated to her left. She looked over at the man, eyed him up and down then turned to her brother. For the first time she noticed how ugly their attire was.

“Gods Jaskier who dressed you two?” She asked as she sipped her orange juice. Both men looked at her. Jaskier looked a bit hurt and Geralt only snorted.

“I told him the clothes were horrendous.” Geralt said beside the young woman making her giggle. The sound made his heart beat faster. This was also when he realized how sensibly everyone else in the room was dressed, and how much they stood out. (Y/N) was in a thin white cotton dress, it was around knee length and a light sweater was on her shoulders. Her mother and father dressed similarly. Their clothes looking normal, comfortable.

“Oh my dear brother. What have you done to the poor witcher.” She laughed, turning her attention to him. She could see how uncomfortable the clothes made him. The vest was way too tight and he was practically bursting out of his pants, not that she minded, she gladly enjoyed the view.

“He is torturing me. That's what.” Geralt scoffed and she couldn't help but giggle again.

“You're so dramatic Geralt it's truly not that bad.” Her head flicked to her brother.

“Jaskier don't be rude.” She tutted him like a mother, it made Geralt snort under his breath as he took a bite of his eggs. She stood and walked behind him. He was stiff at her movements.

“Do you mind?” Her fingers were on the strings of the vest. He shook his head no and she quickly untied the tight strings, and it fell from his shoulders. She took it off and handed it to one of the maids

“You can burn that horridly ugly thing.” She said as she sat back down.

“I do not remember you being so rude, little sister.” Jaskier quipped.

“What I think is rude is how you made sure you got the more presentable clothing and dressed your poor friend in those horrendous colors. Have you seen his pants, Jaskier?? It's a miracle he can still breath.” Her eyes looked towards the witcher who was already looking at her with a cocky smirk on his face, glad she was putting Jaskier in his place for the ugly outfit choice.

“I can take you to the seamstress later today, if you’d like Geralt.” Her smile was like a drug.

“I’d appreciate that m'lady.” He said softly.

“And I can show you around the city, both of you. But in return I would like to hear some of your stories, first hand if that’s doable.”

“That sounds like a reasonable trade.” Geralt quipped back.

“Then it's a date, Witcher.”

“A date it is.”

449 notes · View notes

aelaer · 4 years

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[1/2] Now this is an actual ask as in asking for help. 👀 I have a problem with Steve and Tony. I spent too much time too early on reading anti/not-friendly post-CW fics about 'Team Cap', and because of that I have been unable to see Tony as a flawed human or Steve as a good person. It's a pattern I've become too familiar with, and even recent stories are often going into that sense. I have been trying for some time now to do something about it, but either the method was bad, or I couldn't

(I tagged a couple people in this post – if you were tagged, the question directed to you is wayyyy at the bottom! Feel free to ignore of course.)

You really hit me with a doozy with this ask. I might offend someone for not thinking the exact same way as them with… everything this topic entails… Steve, Tony, anti-fics. Followers from last year know what happened last time I talked about poor and OOC characterization in fanfic, lmao. Beware The Easily Offended! This Is A Critical Thinking Of Your Hobby Zone! I Am Being Critical Of Specific Types of MCU Fanfic!

Please don’t click the read more button if you can’t handle an opinion that might not match yours. Really. I’m fine with discussing different opinions in a mature manner but if you have issues with people saying they don’t like a specific type of plot, this post is not for you. (The read more button doesn’t appear on the original post for followers using the mobile app, but it works on desktop and in all reblogs. If you don’t see a cut and don’t want to read, just skip it, please).

Yeah. Okay. Moving on. Can’t say folks weren’t warned.

I’ve had this in my drafts for several weeks because of the abuse I got the last time I wrote something critical about certain plot points used in fanfic. I was definitely a bit reluctant to look at this specific topic from an analytical and critical look as I remembered that, but hey, it’s really easy for a coward to use a sockpuppet account and throw abuse. It’s harder to be a minority voice with stark opinions contrasting the popular trend. I’m okay with having a minority opinion amongst the MCU fandom.

(PS - you’re welcome to disagree with my opinions, so long as you’re respectful about it. Remember there are individuals behind the screens!)

Concerning Character Flaws

So the thing about really well-written characters is that they are flawed in some manner. Anyone who thinks Tony or Steve exist without flaws – and I mean real flaws, like arrogance, believing they’re always right, short tempers, and other *real* character flaws that both of these characters have – well, if they don’t think they exist with these flaws, how well do they know the character?

You don’t have to know a character well to be a fan of said character – there’s no rules about that – but if you’re going to write fanfic, and that fanfic entails the character you love against a character you don’t particularly like, I’d say any writer looking to do anything resembling a good job would do their due diligence in figuring out the strengths and weaknesses of both characters before writing the characters themselves. These mental lists of characteristics should be equal for both characters. No, “good abs” is not a character strength if you have no physical aspects in the other character strength column. You don’t have to like a character to still write them well.

Even professionals don’t follow this rule when, say, shows get new writers or comics get different writers, so you might consider me silly expecting those dabbling in fan fiction. But yeah, if an author wants me to take a story seriously as something with quality, I expect the characters to resemble themselves in some manner.

(This level of resemblance varies when you purposefully choose for the protagonist to be evil, be in a completely different time period, etc, but authors who do this *well* still get core personality traits solid, even if morality is out the window or the profession is entirely different. I have a lot of examples from the Sherlock fandom of total AUs that pull this off well – haven’t read nearly enough AUs in the MCU to have a good collection here).

But a resemblance of character, of capturing the three-dimensionality of a character, is what anti-fics simply fail to achieve. The characters they’re anti against usually suffer cases of Flanderization, if they’re not completely out of character altogether in showing traits that were never displayed in the canon, ever. I don’t know why anyone would be interested in such stories, myself, and remain baffled at their popularity. Is there some sort of enjoyment in seeing such a 2D rendition of a character in what is otherwise meant as a serious work and provides absolutely no sense of proper conflict between two characters? Not for me; it immediately takes me out of the story and when it gets too much, I abandon the story. It’s just not enjoyable for me. Turning a canon protagonist into a strawman is just lazy writing and offers nothing to the writer’s favorite, preferred character.

Concerning Steve’s and Tony’s Flaws

Every real human being has some sort of personality flaw that is decidedly unattractive. Some people are really good at showing it very rarely (and are some of the best human beings), but with these two characters we see them at their greatest heights and lowest of lows. Ironically, they actually share a lot of the same flaws, but display them in different manners in canon:

Both men believe they are the best man for the job and will do it without consulting someone who could actually fight against it - or go completely against them. Tony with Ultron is the easy example here. He’s the smartest man in the world and can tackle the issue of protecting it on its own. Steve, same issue, and his job is “helping Bucky”. *He’s* the one who can handle Bucky, the only one who can handle him - big thing in both WS and CW. If both of them had utilized their friends and allies a lot more, a lot of issues could have been avoided.

Both men are sometimes hypocritical. Steve promotes teamwork in all his speeches but again with the Bucky situation. Just… everything Bucky, man. Tony signs the Accords and immediately goes against them with what he gives to Peter, who most assuredly did not sign them (tangent: if he HAD joined the Avengers at the end of Homecoming, I have no idea how that would have gone since Peter would have had to reveal his identity to the UN and then there’s the whole ‘still a minor’ thing, and yeah, Homecoming’s end scene just makes me go nuts). But anyway, their occasional hypocrisy is one of the most realistic aspects of them because most human beings are hypocritical sometimes.

Both men are sometimes arrogant. Tony’s self-explanatory with his genius-playboy-philanthropist-billionaire. One thing he does not suffer from is low self-esteem in regards to his abilities. His arrogance comes from his genius. Steve’s arrogance lies more in his deep-seeded belief that he is on the moral high ground – and one reason I think a lot of people dislike him so much, because moral superiority is very much a faux pas in this day and age for some millennials and many Gen Z folk. He has a very, very solid sense of what is right and what is wrong, and that rubs some folks the wrong way. Tony is more morally fluid – but he is not by any means immoral.

Both of them have a really solid list of strengths as well. As this ask specifically is looking to find the good in Steve, I specifically Googled pro-Steve articles for you to click at your leisure (and one with both). If you need to go back to canon, I highly recommend rewatching The First Avenger and The Winter Soldier, which introduces Steve brilliantly and then lets Steve grow further in the second film.

(Note: I actually prefer Tony to Steve in terms of personal favoritism, but how a very loud segment of Tony fans have treated other characters has led me to be more vocal about the strengths of others, especially Steve and Wanda. So Tony might be in my top 5, but mean-spirited Tony fans have moved me to be a champion of other characters, if only to show other fans that there are indeed Tony fans that do like the other characters and treat them – and their fans – with respect).

Bringing Balance (to the Universe…) Fanfic-Style

This addresses the second part of your ask in regards to the fanfics. And this is where I started running into trouble, too, mostly because, well, just how many Stephen and Steve fics are there? Yeah, exactly. Stephen’s my main guy. So I did some research, outsourcing, and reading.

Here’s two I knew of before cuz Stephen’s in them in some capacity:

Identity Theft by KitKat992 - it stars Peter and both Tony and Steve play integral parts from what I recall. Good story too, very engaging.

A Dysfunctional Senior Year (series) by ApolloLoki97 - this also stars Peter and has a large Team As Family aspect, so it shows the entire Avengers team as just decent people. My favorite part is naturally part 3 because Stephen comes in that one, haha.

And to find other stories, I went into the Anti-Accords tag. It was nice to find fics that didn’t have such a love of hypocritical authoritarianism. Aannyyyyway.

Making Sense of Chaos by SparkedtoLife - mind the tags. Seriously, it’s heavy duty. Yet another Peter fic because he’s way more popular than my favorite character, qq. Lots of Netflix Marvel characters too! Anyway, deals with not only Tony and Steve really well (and has a different dynamic with Tony that isn’t IronDad, so that was a nice change of pace), it also deals with the Accords situation very realistically. And none of those are even main plot points. If you can handle the very serious, sensitive subject that is the main plot point, I highly recommended it. It’s a very masterfully done work.

Atlas by nanasekei - Stony. Treats all characters with respect and both Tony and Steve as three-dimensional, flawed humans with some serious self doubts. Also highly agree with the author that Thaddeus Ross sucks and is basically one of the biggest people to blame for Everything Going To Shit.

Homecoming by an orphaned account - Some Stucky. This is a lovely one-shot of things I basically wanted to happen when the team got together again but didn’t. Sigggghhh. Everyone is definitely in character in this one, traumas and healing and all. And look, another person realizes that trusting Ross is a really horrible idea.

Locks Not Replaced by Riverdaughter - first this writer has a Tolkien-based username so yay. Anyway, the fic starts off by Tony realizing that he almost killed Steve during the fight with his repulsors, and it was only Bucky that stopped him. Do people seriously think he’d survive a shot to the face with that power? This is one reason the ‘Steve tried to kill Tony’ people piss me the fuck off. What do you think those repulsors shoot, fucking rainbows? Honestly, guys. Anyway, mini rant over. This fic is great. Author comes in with a Cap favoritism but treats Tony well, and honestly Tony turning a blind eye to everything and ignoring Ross is what I like to think happened in canon (he clearly dislikes the guy). And also I love the Robin Hood parallels. Love love love. I think this fic is my favorite of the ones listed in this section.

Meeting Your Heroes by Riverdaughter - naturally after reading that fic I went to explore more and found this gem. She’s not incorrect in saying Tony wasn’t a good mentor at the beginning - I think he had his own growth after Peter’s actions in Homecoming especially (though even through Homecoming he was trying, just… not always successfully lmao). Anyway love these two together. It’s great.

Photograph by slytherclaw420 - A scene we deserved in Endgame and didn’t get. Sigh. Definite IronDad feels here. Hopeful Steve, rebuilding of a friendship.

And uh, an honorable mention of sorts:

Balancing the Scales by MoonFire1 - I’m not recommending this fic for good characterization or plot. It really doesn’t have either. The fic was written in retaliation for the nasty Tony fans completely trashing Steve’s character. You should only read this if you want to see the argument from “the other side” and if you want to see an anti-Tony fic like you’ve seen anti-Steve fics. Don’t harass the author though. This is presented as a counterargument to anti-Steve fiction, for those interested to read the other sides arguments. I don’t like the nature of the fic, but I loathe that “not Steve friendly” has 30 fucking pages of works with tens of thousands of kudos, so one anti-Tony fic (with a comparatively small three pages under that tag) really doesn’t compare. Ugh. I hate the anti culture in this fandom so much. Loathe it. It’s such a nasty energy! Why would you indulge in such negativity? But as I’ve mentioned before, I appreciate authors aware enough to tag it so I can avoid it. I wish that part of fandom culture didn’t exist, but well, can’t change it. Just can criticize the fuck out of it on my blog. Maybe encourage people to think less one-sided in the process if I’m lucky.

But there’s probably more good characterization Steve fics to be found, so I am forcefully recruiting two people via tag:

If you’re looking to dabble into Stony fics with good-guy-Steve, if anyone would know of any, I’d imagine it’d be @babywarg.

You don’t know this person, but @cairistiona7 has actually known me the longest of anyone here on tumblr (half my life! HALF! She even knows my real name :P She betaed a LOTR work of mine a decade ago I ended up never fully publishing… thanks again for all your help there…). Anyway, she’s a big Bucky fan, and Bucky friendships is the best thing. So if anyone would know any wholesome Bucky and Steve stories, it’d be her. (Or really I’d take any of your recs, Cair, as I’ll probably enjoy them as well).

I hope this was helpful to you md, and that I didn’t piss off too many of my followers in the process of answering this lol.

#mdcbd #tony stark critical #steve rogers critical #meta #the sokovia accords #character analysis #tony stark #steve rogers #peter parker #since he's in a lot of the fics #fic rec #ask #answered #anti culture

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ravenforce · 5 years

Text

Ithaca Pt. 2

Word Count: 2031

Warning/s: None

A/N: Hey loves, a deal is a deal. You got part one to over a hundred notes, so here’s part two. Natasha’s playing a huge part on this arc. So, I thought it’ll be good for you to get to know her in this alternate universe. Let me know what you think of it in my inbox or the comment section. Xx

PS. If there are any grammatical mistakes I’ve still overlooked, I apologize.

Parts: 1 | 3 | 4 | 5

***

5:30 AM

The alarm clock on Natasha’s bedside table reads. She blinked twice at it before sighing. She woke up earlier than her alarm again, not that she’s actually excited to go to school. Today, she’s actually supposed to tour the new transfer student, which is, by the way, is not her job as the Student Council President but Clint is out of commission for the week for some Intercollegiate archery competition in Washington DC. So, as President, she had to step in and do it.

‘At least, this is gonna be different from yesterday’, she thought to herself as she rolls out of bed.

Living in Ithaca since she’s a child meant Natasha knew the city like the back of her hand, knew almost every single family in town and went to school with the same kids since the beginning of her existence. It also meant being friends with founding family kids like the Odinsons, Tony Stark, Clint Barton, and Steve Rogers since forever ago. She was the only girl in their group until Carol Danvers moved in when they were eight. Maria transferred to their school and was easily adapted to their crew when they were thirteen. The last addition to their gang was Valkyrie and Wanda, who migrated somewhere from Europe when they’re fifteen.

Six years after, a new person arrives in Ithaca. The school didn’t give her a lot of information regarding the new student, only that it is a woman and Stark level intelligent. She tried to dig up info on her own, and thankfully she didn’t have to go far for a source since apparently the new girl is close friends with Tony and best friends with Maria. Maria is one busy nerd to track down though, and they don’t share a lot of classes together. So, Natasha wasn’t able to get too many details from her aside from a departing comment.

“Relax, Nat. She’s amazing; smart but not obnoxious like Tony,” Maria said before practically running towards her next class. She considers herself pretty intrigued.

‘How can someone be as smart as Tony and not be obnoxious? That sounds like an oxymoron,’ Natasha thought to herself.

***

6:00 AM

Natasha is the only founding family kid who liked being awake at the wee hours of the morning. She likes getting ahead of everybody, and she thinks better when the world is still asleep. So, being in school at the crack of dawn isn’t new too for anyone. Even the groundskeepers let her nowadays.

“Good Morning, Miss Romanoff,” the old security lady at the studio greeted her.

“Good Morning, Mrs. Miller,” Natasha smiled before logging in her credentials.

“Early start today?” Mrs. Miller asked politely and jovially.

“Yes, Clint is away for a tournament. So I have to give the grounds tour to the transfer student later,” Nat explained with a smile. Mrs. Miller didn’t respond and just waved Natasha inside.

Natasha’s been doing ballet ever since she can remember. At first, she was doing it because her family wanted her to and all of the founding family children are doing one extracurricular activity every after school. Thor has been sailing since he learned how to walk, Loki, on the other hand, preferred fencing. Clint tried equestrian for awhile but his heart and talents were really in archery. Steve got so good in lacrosse that he ended up with a sports scholarship playing one. Tony chose chess because he deemed contact sports barbaric; he believes the battle of the wits is better than a physical brawl, which Steve always take as an offense.

Being the only girl in their group, Natasha decided that ballet is her yoga. The boys know not to come within a hundred yards of the studio whenever Natasha’s practicing. Ballet has become Natasha’s sanctuary away from the noise and the usual ruckus of the boys. She shed everything inside the studio but today, Natasha finds it nearly impossible to focus on the movements and the music. Her thoughts keep drifting to the conversation she had with Tony the day prior about the new student.

“Nat, what are you fuzzing about? It’s just a school tour,” Tony complained. He was tinkering around his home lab when Natasha arrived and being a regular visitor, she was allowed to roam and look for Tony herself.

“I just wanna know what she looks like. So I know who to look for in the morning crowd,” she whined.

Tony put his stuff down, pull the safety goggles off his face and looked at his friend. If Nat has been any other girl, she would have melted in the way Tony was looking at her.

“Oh, trust me, you won’t miss her,” Tony said simply before smiling and walking out of his lab. “She’s breathtaking, in more ways than just physical.”

Natasha groaned and scrambled to follow her friend and bug him for more information.

***

7:00 AM

Natasha cut her practice short since she couldn’t focus. She showered and got ready in record time. She was leaning against the handrail of the front steps of the school, scrolling through her Instagram feed when she looked up and saw a face she didn’t know. Her fingers hovered over her phone mid-swipe, thankfully she had enough grace at that moment not to have her mouth hanging open as she gaped at the transfer student. She’s wearing a very preppy outfit, which wasn’t really Natasha’s style or the style girls she usually goes after but something about this girl that makes her stomach flutter with nervous butterflies.

“Y/N Y/L/N?” she asked, all trace of her nervousness gone when the girl came to a stop at the bottom of the stairs.

“Who’s asking?” the girl asked.

Natasha watched the girl take her in. She reined in the urge to squirm under the Y/N’s eyes. For God’s sake, she’s Natasha Romanoff. Various girls all over town wants her, she’s by no means gonna squirm under a stranger’s beautiful eyes.

“Natasha Romanoff. Student Council President,” she introduced herself confidently to take back control. “Pleasure to meet you.”

Natasha smirked as the new girl blushed profusely before smiling up at her. “Pleasure is all mine,” she said.

‘Breathtaking is an understatement’ she thought to herself when she saw Y/N’ smile. Natasha’s not a sap, she doesn’t plan on being one but at that moment, she thought she’d do anything to make you smile at her every day.

“I’m here to give you the grounds tour,” Natasha explained before pulling the door open and prompting you to walk with her.

Usually, when she had to cover grounds tour for Clint, Natasha almost always wraps it up under forty-five minutes. She just points which buildings houses which classes, where the important areas are such as the library and the mess hall. Today, with you by her side, Natasha found herself giving her first, in-depth school tour. Literally giving out facts and even stupid trivia when she remembers it.

Natasha walked as leisurely as possible to prolong her time with you but she knew you have a 9 AM class. And she might not be as nerdy as Tony but she’s not gonna skip class, let alone make you on your first day of school.

***

8:30 AM

Natasha’s one of the quiet ones in her crew that’s why she get along spectacularly with Maria. Both of you filled the walk towards the art building with polite small talk about which classes you two take, how you finished a degree at eighteen and in one of the toughest schools in the country at that, and how you’re friends with Maria and Tony. God, Natasha didn’t want the tour to end. She didn’t want you to stop talking, which is new because Natasha finds it annoying when people don’t know when to shut up. She wants to get to know you more.

Her heart sunk a little when she caught you discreetly glancing at your watch but by the number of kids watching the two of you in the hallway, she knew that class is fast approaching. She decided to be a little playful.

“Oh,” Natasha gasped and frowned. “Am I boring you?” she asked quietly.

“What?!” you exclaimed, earning a few curious looks from students in the hallway.

Natasha watched the emotions play out across your face, and she thought you’re even more fascinating. She’s been friends all her life with Tony, another Mensa student, another genius. She thought you’d be obnoxiously cool and a little indifferent like him but in the past hour and a half, Natasha found you brilliant but not condescending, warm, and empathetic.

“No, no, you’re not boring. I was just wondering if I’m allowed to skip the first period on my first day of school because this is by far the coolest school tour I’ve ever done,” you rambled on.

Natasha couldn’t help but grin. If she paid attention to anyone else other than you, she would have noticed several students openly gawking at the toothy smile on her face. Natasha’s reputation was not built on being chummy with just anyone, especially new kids. But she wasn’t looking, she could only look at you. She will be caught dead before she admits to having a school girl crush at first meet but at that moment, in that crowded hallway, she decided she definitely likes you. She just has to find out if she has a fighting chance.

“You’re cute when you ramble,” she said matter-of-factly. “And no, you’re not allowed to skip the first period because you’re here.”

“Oh,” you said before glancing at the classroom door.

Natasha took a step towards you and tucked a stray hair behind your ear. “See you later, Y/L/N,” she said slowly, watching the blush crept up from your neck before dusting your cheeks.

‘Beautiful, so beautiful,’ she thought before turning on her heels and gracefully walking away.

“Blushing doesn’t mean she’s gay. Maybe she’s just the shy type, I can work with that,” she murmured to herself while walking to her classroom. She looked up when she heard soft muttering in front of her.

“Danvers!” she growled. Carol’s pressing a girl between her toned body and the wall.

Carol didn’t even have to look to know who it is that interrupted her. She knows that voice anywhere. “Tasha,” she said sweetly.

Natasha didn’t smile, she only continued to glare until the girl pushed Carol away and scrambled to get to her classroom. Carol swipe a hand through her hair before turning towards her friend. Natasha glanced at her watch.

“You’re ten minutes late already,” Nat started. “And your class is on the other side of the campus.”

Carol ignored the fact that Natasha still knows her schedule. She walked towards the redhead until she’s toe to toe with Natasha. Natasha didn’t step back, she’s used to Carol always invading her personal space.

“I got that class in the bag, Tasha. Relax,” Carol whispered before leaning in, kissing Natasha close to her mouth, and running away.

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kittenfemme27 · 4 years

Text

Bastion: What it means to truly move on.

“Someday, your bird is gonna fly.”

Bastion is the first game released by what is now the critically acclaimed Supergiant Games, makers of other games like Transistor, Pyre, and most recently Hades. But back in 2011 they were a nobody. 7 developers from various backgrounds within the industry came together to make games that could focus on storytelling first and foremost more than any of their previous studios would allow. Bastion was the result of that. Starting out from the idea of a top down isometric RPG, Supergiant realized that they wanted to portray a world that was fractured and broken, and wanted to show the vast and empty sky as a contrast to that destruction, but realized the camera angle wouldn’t allow this. So they came up with the idea that the ground would come up in front of the player as they walked forward, allowing the empty sky to show beneath them since the groundwork would not originally be laid until the player walked towards it. To explain this choice and why the world reacted this way, a destructive event known as “The Calamity” was created in the game's story. Thus, Bastion found its ethos.

Bastion’s a masterpiece. Plain and simple. It's been ported to nearly everything under the sun for a reason, being playable on literally 3 different console generations as well as every OS a PC can run, but coming back to play this game for the first time within the current political and geological climate that we find ourselves within as time goes on only makes it more and more apparent how much the story has to say. Even if you could somehow ignore it’s absolutely incredible music, insanely varied and addictive and yet delightfully simple gameplay, jaw dropping art direction and set pieces, Bastion’s storytelling is at its core and the story it has to tell is one that I think a lot of people didn’t fully appreciate back in 2011. From what I could find online, most people either ignored it in favor of the gameplay, or let the meaning of it glaze over them. And that's really, deeply a shame. Because Bastion is one of the best games I have ever played. And I’d like to talk about why.

Gameplay:

“Kid just rages for a while...”

I want to start first and foremost by talking about the gameplay and how you engage with the world. Combat in Bastion is simple and not exactly groundbreaking. An isometric hack ‘n’ slash with 2 weapon slots and a single ability, with a shield that has a parry mechanic and a dodge roll with fairly lenient invulnerability frames. Player movement is very, very slow which encourages you to very quickly become proficient in dodging and blocking. It’s fun, for sure, if just a little bit easy. But it’s nothing to write home about at first. As you play, though, you’ll begin to uncover Bastion's hidden depth and variety within its combat. A lot of that depth comes from the sheer number of Weapons, Upgrades, Passives, and Skills you can equip in any combination.

You are given 11 weapons, each of which can be upgraded with collectibles found within the levels for a total of 5 times per weapon, and these upgrades form a loose “trees” of upgrades that you can switch between at will. You can make the Spear better at critical hits and critical damage and faster thrusts, or make it better at throwing with more spears per throw, for example. Every single weapon has a 2 distinctive upgrade “Trees” in this way that clearly make it better at one specific aspect of the weapon, but you are free to mix and match these upgrades as you see fit. Maybe you want the Spear to have a high critical hit rate, but also throw 2 spears per throw, you can do that. It’s also worth mentioning that there are no restrictions placed upon you on what type of weapons you want to take. You can take two melee weapons, or two ranged weapons, whatever combination you desire is up to you. The narrator even has a line for literally every combination you can have that you’ll hear upon exiting the armory. Some compare you to legends of yore from the game worlds past, others point out just how plain silly it is for the Kid to carry both a mortar launcher and a rocket launcher.

Each weapon also comes with two skills that you can use during gameplay, ranging from protective skills like one that makes you block all attacks for a few seconds, to damage based skills such as the Bow’s skill that fires a ricocheting arrow between enemies. Even then, there are other Skills that are tied to no weapons at all which brings the total of skills in the game to 30.

In addition, there’s the Tonic system in which each level up confers a slot that you can equip a drink from the bar, for a total of 10 at max level. These function as passives applied to your character that allow even further customization. Some are basic things you’d expect, such as overall more health, or more restoration or ability potions, a flat 15% damage resistance, and so on. A number of these however offer a very very strong benefit in exchange for a side effect. Werewhiskey, for example, gives you a 100% crit rate but only below 35% health. Doomshine offers a permanent 10% crit but takes away 10% of your health permanently. Or Leechade, which allows you to gain health from striking enemies, but makes your health potions only 1/3rd as effective. These can all be stacked upon each other in any order or combination. You choose and be changed at any point between missions..

All of these systems together enhance the very simple hack ‘n’ slash combat to be something with infinitely more depth than presented to you at first glance, and something that you can experiment with as much as you want, since no choice is permanent. Part of the way it encourages you to experiment are the Weapon Challenge missions that crop up each time you obtain a new weapon. They ask you to complete some sort of challenge related to that weapon with no Skills, no other weapons, and in some of them not even the ability to dodge or block. Besting these will net you 1 of 3 prizes, depending on how well you did, With the first two prizes being upgrade materials and the last being a Skill for the weapon the challenge is based on.

Beating Bastion unlocks a “Score-Attack” version of New Game+ that keeps a running overall score during the whole game and during stage specific score for each mission, with a multiplier and a timer to keep that multiplier up. This effectively turns the game into a leaderboard chasing isometric arcade game. Every enemy adds 1 to the multiplier, and resets the timer, so it's up to you to run through each mission as fast as possible and challenge yourself to see what kind of score you can get, and since it lets you replay any mission you want, you can always find ways to get a higher and higher score. One of my playthroughs of this game was on the PS Vita and even since beating it, I've found myself trying to one-up my own score while i’m just sitting around since each mission only takes about 10-20 minutes. The most challenging content in the game is a set of 4 different repeatable combat arena’s with 20 waves of some of the toughest enemies in the game. You can make this even harder by invoking each God within the games Pantheon and raising the difficulty of every enemy you encounter. Doing this raises how many points you get per kill, and in these combat arena’s I’ve regularly topped a million points in just a single stage from precise gameplay.

I think that’s what I find amazing about Bastion’s combat is that despite 3 playthroughs, I never once found myself bored or annoyed by any of it. All 3 of my playthroughs had me switching up Weapons, Upgrades, Skills, and Tonics between every mission just to experiment and see what crazy builds I could make. Every challenge was always a delight and a real test of skill, every mission a romp where I got to find a new weapon and play with it each time. Often, I would die, but that was fine! Losing in Bastion is fun. It’s part of the experience, because you can always go back and change your build to whatever you desire to try again. In a way, it’s fitting for the entire theme of the game. It’s the End of the world, and there are no more rules. Do whatever you’ve gotta do. Might as well have fun with it, while you do.

Art & Sound:

“I suppose all that's left... is to try'n remember this moment.”

I think the other reason that I didn’t get bored on any of my 3 playthroughs of Bastion was the absolutely breathtaking art and music the game features. The soundtrack, composed by Darren Korb, clocks in only at an hour and while that does sometimes mean that there are repeats of songs, I'd be lying if I told you there was a single song on that score that I didn’t absolutely love. Or that I thought was out of place during any section of the game. Each and every song is its own radically different soundscape that, in songs like “Brynn the Breaker”, invokes a feeling of complete and utter destruction around you and a sense of leaning into that destruction. It’s fitting that the first time this song plays, you are almost assuredly going to hear the line “Kid just rages for awhile...” as you wreck each and every enemy and object around you after waking up on a floating rock in the sky. Meanwhile, in other songs such as “Build that Wall”, it's clear that Supergiant was acutely aware of the impact their music could have on a scene. In Caelondia, the games world, “Build that Wall” is a jingoistic anthem meant to inspire the Cael by noting the danger they face from the outside world and from the Ura, a people who live to the east, and implores them to build walls to keep everyone else but keep themselves safe. But the first time you hear that song, you’ll be rolling through the dilapidated ruins of Prosper Bluff, a place overrun by birds ready to rip you apart and barely hanging together by literal boards between each floating island, and not a wall in sight. Guided only by the simultaneously soothing and haunting voice of an Ura girl singing the theme of the people who hate her. In that moment, it sounds much more sorrow and sad than any anthem for a nation ever could.

Darren Korb has stated that the point of Bastions music was meant to invoke a sense of the “American Frontier”, of exploring new and uncharted land, but it’s interwoven with melodic and slow moments of tragedy and despair, featuring lots of slow acoustic guitar and lots of slow vocals when there are any at all. I really cannot praise enough this choice of frontier-ism interwoven into the music itself, as it sells the entire theme of the game perfectly.

The art of the game is just as fantastic, too. Supergiant set out to make sure you could see the sky in a top down game, which sounds a little absurd and like a nearly impossible feat, and yet they succeeded with such aplomb it almost seems like it was easy. Below each stage is a blurred barrage of trees, nature, clouds, sky, sometimes ruins within those things, it reminds you constantly that the world has ended and nature has reclaimed it. Progressing further and further down the set of missions and further away from the Bastion and Caelondia sees you going more and more into what's left of those wilds and away from the ruins of civilization, before reaching the icy peaks in the east of the Ura. It creates this feeling of loss and tragedy at what's lost, a sense of exploration into this new and unknown world, before finally getting to it's cold center as you get closer to the truth of the Calamity.

In general, the art style of Bastion feels like a living breathing oil painting. Features on people are exaggerated with small bodies, yet large heads and eyes and hands or feet. Making them feel like something out of a children's book. Every single thing in the game is full of color and life, down to the animals and the foliage, with the only notable exceptions being the ruins of buildings that are oppressive and gray, and the final cold reaches of the Ura’s leftover ruins. Because of the oil painting aesthetic, the narration, even the surreality of the world coming up before you, Bastion feels a lot more like playing a fairy tale than anything else I've ever played, even things that have tried to emulate that same effect. Bastion reminds us that the presentation of a game, in both its art and its music, tell just as much about the story and the world of a game as the actual story itself does.

Story: (Spoiler Warning)

“Now here’s a kid who’s whole world got twisted, leaving him stranded on a rock in the sky.”

Bastion is a game about a lot of things, but at its heart, it’s a game about Tragedy. A tragedy you can’t prevent no matter what you do, because it has already happened. Setpieces in the game constantly remind you of this, like going through the Hanging Gardens, a place where people used to gather and finding nothing but ashen corpses. Rucks, Bastion’s narrator, will even tell you the names of these people. I remember playing this game in 2011 and being upset at this. I wanted to know about Maude the Tutor, I wanted to hear the life of Percy the Snitch, but I couldn’t. That was the tragedy. It didn’t register with me at the time, but that was the point. I was supposed to be upset I couldn’t know these people, that they died in a tragedy I couldn’t prevent.

The core story of Bastion revolves around a war that took place some 50 odd years ago. Caelondia and her people, versus the Ura. In the modern day, before the calamity, the war was over. There was an Ura named Zulf who was trying to broker peace, even. But the Caelondian’s military-science division, the “Mancers” had a secret weapon. One they intended to use to get rid of the Ura for good. It would cause a genocide of the very land the Ura lived in and cause it to literally fall into nothing, ripping apart the physical earth where it stood before. Worse yet, this weapon was being created by an Ura inventor that lived within Caelondia named Venn under threat to his daughter, Zia. Venn couldn’t stand to aid the destruction of his people and sabotaged the weapon that ushers in the Calamity with vengeance in his heart, so that it would backfire and take Caelondia down with it. Imagine Venns shock, then, when the mancers asked him to pull the trigger.

Turns out an eye for an eye makes the whole world blind. Just like that, the Calamity has already happened. The Ura who were discriminated against in every part of Cael society and the racism and cycle of vengeance and violence within the Caels and the Ura reached a boiling point that caused the literal end of the world.. And that’s where you wake up. In a world already torn apart and crumbling before you. On a rock in the sky.

Tragedy permeates everything about the game. In the Hanging Gardens, you find Zulf as he’s about to kill himself after watching his Cael wife crumble to ash right before his eyes. When you meet the second survivor, an Ura singer who just so happens to be Zia, Venns daughter. She’s mournfully singing the tune of Caelondia that was the anthem used to inspire the Caels to oppress her own people, and her sweet voice sounds like the dying breath of an entire nation. Bastion makes it very clear that these people's lives as they knew them are over. But then Bastion asks you a simple question: You have to keep going, so what are you going to do with that world?

Before you get to make that choice, though, you’re asked to decide the fate of a man who hurts you. Zulf at one point reads the journal of Venn that he obtains from Zia and learns everything about the Calamity. He learns about the Mancers plan to genocide his people. He learns about Venns sabotage. Zulf spent his entire life advocating for peace between the two peoples, and this is what he’s met with. Unable to stand it, he attempts to destroy the Bastion and flees after injuring Rucks. As you chase him, he lures you far from the Bastion and sends the signal to an entire army of Ura survivors to attack the Bastion, even persuading Zia to come with him to try and convince her to abandon the Bastion. In the end, though. You chase him all the way to the heart of the Ura nation and as retaliation for bringing someone so powerful who kills so many Ura, the Ura forces attack Zulf and leave him for dead. You come across his body and are given a choice to either leave him and carry on, or take him with you and abandon your weapon. You’re asked right then and there, can you forgive someone who hurt you and your chance at fixing the world and break the cycle of violence? Or will you press on, like Venn, with vengeance in heart. If you choose to save Zulf, you walk forward with zulf on your shoulder through multiple Ura archers shooting you nearly to death. It’s only once they realize that you’re trying to save Zulf do they stop trying to attack you. This moment of compassion, this breaking of the cycle, inspires the Ura to let you pass. If you choose not to save him, you must battle an entire army, which isn’t even hard for you at that point. It’s a bloodbath. You, a Cael kid from nowhere, end the last of the Ura outside of Zia who knows so little of her culture that she can’t even read the journal her father left over. You succeed where the Mancers failed. The cycle of violence remains unbroken within you and within your heart.

You’re given two options upon returning to the Bastion at the end. You can use the power of the Bastion to reset the world to where it was before the Calamity. You’ll lose all your memories, but everyone and everything that died will be okay and alive again. There’s a risk, though. Rucks has no way of knowing if this plan will work. If it will prevent the Calamity in the end. “Problem with a machine that sets things back to a bygone time,” he says, “Is that you can’t test it.”

Your other option is Zia’s choice, though both her and Rucks support whatever decision you make, they know it’s not an easy choice. Her plan is to turn the Bastion into a floating island ship that can travel anywhere. To forge a new world and look for survivors on other floating islands and carry on in this destroyed world and find hope within that tragedy. Make something new, and beautiful, from the ashes of something dead. Maybe that’s not possible, she thinks, but it’s better than recreating a world with institutional violence, with cycles of hate and vengeance, a world where something like the Calamity could happen in the first place.

Supergiant knew what most people would pick, though. Resetting seems like the only real choice, at first. Maybe the Calamity will happen again, maybe it won’t, but you can’t just let all those people die. The whole game has been building up to fixing the Calamity. Rucks, old and clinging to the past, is sure that resetting it will work and that things will be okay again. He’s a bit like a father figure to you, too. He’s narrated every action you took, made sure you were never truly alone in this ruinous world. So of course you trust him. An overwhelming amount of people chose to reset the world the first time they play. I did, too. I knew that maybe the Calamity would happen again, but I couldn’t just let everyone die. Maybe things would be different, I thought. Maybe this time people won’t let something like a genocide happen again. Maybe Venn won’t pull the trigger. I didn’t know, but it was better than letting everyone die, right? It had to be. I had to hope that I made the right decision. So with trepidation in my heart. I chose to reset everything.

Rucks comforts you when you choose to reset that “No matter what happens next... you done good.” Credits roll. You see pictures of the lives of each character in the reset Caelondia. The lonesome Kid continues his work as a mason on the wall built to keep the Ura out, where he isolated himself after losing everyone in his life. The only person to ever sign up for 2 tours on the Wall. Rucks continues his work on the Bastion, refining it for the future, meaning that there’s still a need for a safeguard like it in the first place. Zia plays a concert on her harp with a mournful look on her face, she found comfort in music but that comfort was equally as isolating and lonely, what with her being an Ura girl in Caelondia. Zulf gets married to his fiancee, blissfully unaware of the impending genocide on his people while he fruitlessly brokers peace. Upon seeing these credits, these images of the lives of these characters, I knew I made a mistake. History is going to repeat itself. Sure they were alive, and so was everyone else, but the cycle of violence remains unbroken and eventually, even if the Calamity that befell the world the first time doesn’t happen again, another will. Rucks final words in this ending are a simple forlorn goodbye. “So long kid... Maybe I'll see you in the next one. Caelondia... We’re coming home.”

Choosing this ending left me feeling anxious at first, and then hollow and empty. I didn’t save anyone, I just clung to the past. I expected things to be different in a world where something like the Calamity could happen in the first place. I knew, then, that for there to be any hope at all I had to move on from the old world. I had to do right by Rucks, by Zia, even by Zulf. They were my friends. They deserved better, they deserved more. They deserved a world without the conflict and violence that Caelondia brings. I understood even more clearly what I had done when, upon starting a new game, Rucks final words echoed over the loading screen. As far as I could tell, the Calamity had happened again. Rucks even makes comments of feeling a sort of deja-vu while retelling the story and is much less confident resetting will work the second go around, for a reason he just can’t quite explain.

Bastion is a story about tragedy, about generational trauma left over from a war, about the cycle of violence and all that it perpetuates. It’s a story about waking up in a world that has already crumbled and fallen apart through no fault of your own and being told there is nothing you can do about that destruction. And there isn’t. Climate change is a bigger problem now in 2020 than it ever was in 2011. People are going to die, it’s just an awful fact at this point. Those in charge continue to ignore that fact and these issues while also continuing to stoke the fires and flames of the impoverished and destitute more and more every day, bleeding them dry for any pennies they might have.

But that’s not all Bastion has to say. It’s not fair for the next generation just like it wasn’t fair for the Kid, to wake up in a world already destroyed, and yet still, people like the Kid and Zia found hope. Within Bastion, you can save Zulf and end the cycle of violence, you can choose Zia’s option and set out on a world that is better for everyone in the end, as ruined as it is. Even in the end of the world and everything you knew, there is hope. Bastion doesn’t just ask, it begs on hands and knees for the next generation to take up this dying world and make it better. Bastion, and Supergiant, believes in the next generation. that it's possible to move on from the past and make something better, to seize control and make a better world while purposefully never forgetting the cycles of violence that led us to the end of the world in the first place. Our great Calamity is already unfolding before us and there isn’t anything we can do to stop it, only delay it. Bastion tells us that it's okay, that we can make something beautiful, and new, and better from those ashes.

In the scene for the Evacuation ending, Rucks tells us that he’s not sure how to live in a world like this, but he’s willing to learn. And excitedly offers to help teach you how to fly the Bastion through the skies. The very first image you see during the credits then, is the Kid finally collapsing of exhaustion and resting while Rucks tucks him in. The next is Zia looking forward on the deck of the Bastion, a smile on her face and hope in her heart. You get to see Rucks later teaching the Kid how to fly the Bastion, finally giving the Kid the family that he so desperately needed, and finally you see Zulf. He’s got a frown on his face, he’s still lost everything in the Calamity after all. More than anyone. But he’s chopping food for everyone else still, helping out where he can. I couldn’t help but think upon seeing his expression that he might hate me for the rest of my life, and that was alright. I’d always just be happy he was alive. Seeing the smiling faces of everyone in the Evacuation made something very clear to me. In the Old World, Zia was an outcast, Zulf was a fool, Rucks was nostalgic, and the Kid was alone. In the Calamity, they found friendship, they found happiness, they found love and family in each other, they found adventure and they found hope for the future. Zia’s final words to the Kid echoed in my head:

"Any moment I'd want to live again... happened after the Calamity. Not before."

And I was at peace. I knew I had done the right thing I had chosen to move on, accepting the world for what it was and not looking for miracle solutions to fix it or change it, but to forge on ahead with what I had and make something better.

Bastion’s story is not directly told to you, especially after the ending. There is no epilogue that tells you exactly what happened, just a few lines of dialogue that you can make of what you will and some pictures of the lives after your choice. it’s never explicitly stated that the Calamity happens again if you choose to reset things. It’s meaning is in between the lines that Rucks has to say. It’s In the subtext. It's in the art, it's in the environment, like the tragedy of finding nothing but ashen corpses around a lone peace talker right before he’s about to jump to his death. It’s in the music, like the haunting melody of an outcast’s voice singing the song of her oppressors while never realizing how much the very city she was raised in tried to exterminate her. But more than anything it's in the feeling you get while you play. Bastion’s story plays out in your heart as much as it plays out in your mind and on the screen in-front of you. What you feel, what you make of it, that’s just as important to the meaning of the story as what you’re hearing and seeing. Obviously this can be said of all stories, but Bastion is maybe the one that’s resonated most in my heart and in my soul more so than any other story. It offers no simple answers, no painless choices, and no easy ways out. Move on, or cling to the past, those are your only two options and Bastion forces you to make a choice.

In the end, I chose a new world. A better world. A world with my friends that would never let the cycles of violence and the generational trauma that caused the Calamity to happen again. Sure, resetting technically brings everyone back to life, but it wasn’t until I chose to move on and move forward that I felt I could even say in my heart that I’d saved anyone at all.

Conclusion:

“I dig my hole, you build a wall.”

“Build that wall, and build it strong, Cause we’ll be there before too long.”

Bastion is, and I'm not saying this lightly, a perfect game. The gameplay loop and combat is phenomenal and addicting, the music and art and aesthetics are so top notch you could honestly create an entire art style out of them all on their own, the storytelling is amazing and has so much to say that I cannot believe something this important was just thrown out by an indie studio nobody had ever heard of while it was only 7 people strong, and how many people slept on it or completely missed the point of the tragedy of Caelondia and the Ura.

This game will live in my heart for a very, very long time and its music and messages it conveyed will stick with me even longer. My only regret with Bastion is that I’ll never get to experience it for the first time again. But, even with the spoilers here, you can. Play it, Kid. You won’t regret it.

“We can't go back no more. But I suppose we could go... wherever we please.”

#Bastion #Review #Played on: PC #Played on: PS Vita

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fe-husband-heaven · 5 years

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Top ten ((or 5)) heroes who will end someones whole career if they hurt their summoner Or.... A private 'one on one lesson' with M!Byleth please? From a fan who heard your wish Ps your amazing

rjdjdj Ngl, that one on one session sounds mad spicy ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) but the more husbands the marrier so I pick the Top 5 (For length reasons) but I'm adding 3 hee hee (ฅ`ω´ฅ)

+++I'm super weak to protective heroes nya-

In no specific order! Just whoever pops into my head first!

1. Grima:

I mean...C'mon..do I even have to say anything? Like, just breathing in the general vicinity of his summoner has Grima on red alert. You see, Grima is in one state and one state only when it comes to humans that aren't the Summoner.

And that state is: "People suck. Except for this one. I like this one. This one is mine. You are not them. Which means you suck. Die."

But when someone foolishly dares to harm the summoner, all bets are off. No one will even attempt to interfere, they can't, not if they don't want to be collateral damage. Grima will go absolutely feral and the dark suffocating aura radiating off of him is enough to bring the greatest of heroes to their knees.

The only thing that will bring him out of such a state is the complete decimation of the person who inflicted harm upon you, or your whimpers at the entire ordeal. He places you over everything else, no matter how much he wants to rip the offender limb from limb.

2. Ephraim:

You see, Ephraim is already looking for a chance to use Siegmund so when he's served a silver platter in the form of a hurt Summoner, he won't think twice about ripping into who ever was the perpetrator.

He's quite protective and it probably stems from his doting brother side but he is just a little wary of anyone you talk to, you don't fight so you're left completely defenseless. When he imagines what sort of fate might befall you, it nearly makes him want to abandon Renais and escort you wherever you go.

His confidence is not ill-placed, he certainly will eviscerate anyone who tries to hurt you, and he has full faith that he can stand up to any opponent. He'd want someone to do the same for Eirika if he were not present so when he sees that you have no elder sibling accompanying you in Askr, he feels his elder brother heart crack.

Those feelings are only heightened by the fact that he's fallen for you, he's plenty strong, so he's more than able to keep both his sister and his beloved, safe. Just stay by his side, he won't let anyone lay a finger on you.

3. Henry:

Those hexes aren't just for show! And he's more than eager to test them out! Especially, after they've given an ouchie to the Summoner.

Henry would just love to test out his most horrific spells, he doesn't think twice about using the most malicious hexes he can think of. And he'd test many all at once, only stopping when you ask it of him and even then he'll secretly slip in a couple more to ruin the others life.

Henry really likes you, and its 'cawse of that that he sticks to you so diligently. Henry isn't at all ashamed of showing his fondness, following you wherever you go so it's to no surprise to anyone that Henry reacts so strongly to you being hurt.

Also, after you get hurt, expect Henry to be everywhere you are. Oh you took a shower? You'll find him on your bed when you come out. A walk through the Askran garden? Don't be surprised if he's up in a tree conversing with his crow friends. He does see one silver lining though, and its that he now has a valid excuse to stick to you like glue nyaha

4. Alfonse:

Now you might be a little surprised. Yes, Alfonse can be overprotective but end someone's whole career? Yes. Yes he can. Did you see how he reacted when Bruno was falsely claiming he killed Zacharias? Yeah, he was going to strike him down for it, now imagine when someone hurts his other half.

You've gone and made him attached so he's going to do everything in his power to protect you. You're not even from Askr. You had no friends, no family, no one to count on when you first arrived so Alfonse couldn't help the mother hen instincts that wanted to keep you safe from harm.

If Alfonse could have his way then he'd probably keep you by his side 24/7, aside from his protectiveness, he also just enjoys your company. It's been a long time since he has allowed himself to accept someone into his life and he'll protect it at all cost. Though he wouldn't want to, if it meant ending the prospects of another's life for you, then so be it.

5. Jakob:

You see, you being hurt greatly upsets his liege which greatly upsets him but his unprecedented attachment to you only makes it worse! When you are hurt, it is as though Corrin them self has been harmed. He's already pledged himself to Corrin but he finds himself compelled to serve you too.

As such any harm to come to you is a failure on his behalf. And he absolutely will not hold back on the just punishment for the scoundrel who dared to lay their grubby hands on you.

Afterwards, he will surely tend to your every need as he allowed such a thing to happen in the first place. When you tell him that it is not at all his fault, he only doubles his efforts to taking care of you.

6. Dimitri:

You have shown him such kindness and did away with formalities that often stifled relationships with his friends that he cannot help but want to remain by your side. He quite adores your smile so to instead see such a pained expression, it is so...crushing.

When someone who gives so much selflessly is treated in such a way, he can't sit by and watch, he'll eliminate anyone who can be seen as your enemy. Anyone.

It's one of the few times that his demeanor changes completely, its almost frightening. We're Felix in Askr, he'd definitely remark about it being his true form. At the very least, Dimitri makes it very clear that you are off limits and any ill will towards you will be met with the tip of a lance.

7. Niles:

You see, the only one to inflict pain on you shall be him, and it'll be in the bedroom so he's not a fan of someone else trying to get in on the fun. He toys with whoever hurt you, a cat looking down at its prey. Whether physically or mentally, he'll ensure the suffering of the offender he can promise you that.

While he might have hated the idea of being at your every beck and call when he first arrived in Askr, now, he is more than happy in getting rid of vermin nipping at your heels.

He does think you would look good with a few chips but he'd like to be the one doing the breaking so all bets are off when someone else interferes~

His unsavory past gave him nothing but torment and abandonment issues but it did allow for various nefarious connections with the underground and information network that he intends to put to use against the little rat who will become his next meal.

Now then, you really should take better care of yourself, he'd be glad to show you how.

8. Ranulf:

Ranulf just radiates "I know shit." energy

And while abandoning his daily naps in your lap and purr inducing scratches behind the ear in favor of getting his hands dirty isn't what he'd call a fun time, he'd more than repay whoever hurt you for what they did.

It's such a hassle but he has claws and he isn't afraid to use him, especially when it comes to you. He's not one to hold grudges but you're the exception. If you don't want the claws, then don't mess with a cat's belongings.

Of course, don't expect him to leave you alone afterwards for a while. The whole ordeal is deserving of a few cat naps together, don't you think?

#fire emblem heroes #feh #fe heroes #grima #alfonse #ranulf #ephraim #dimitri #henry #niles #jakob #djdndn my mans #tbh half of the army is protective but i chose the best bois

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steve0discusses · 4 years

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Yugioh S4 Ep 9: Denial on so Many Fronts

I’ve managed to have a pretty open timeslot this holiday, where I decided I was going to do lots of catch up work. (I have instead filled up my Background Music Playlist with lots of youtube piano covers of Castlevania.)

So of course I find myself back at this blog to fill the leftover time, it being so many weeks (months, actually) since I was able to do a double update weekend (spoiler, I did not finish a second update :) ).

This episode, Yugioh decided to legitimately enter romance territory and y’all it is something. And I don’t mean it in a “Ain’t that something!” sort of way, I mean it in the “That is...something.” Kind of way. And for the first time in forever, I actually have to talk about romance today. For once that is actually something this episode is about. For about 5 entire minutes. It’s staggering.

So lets get into it because the stance the show decides to take against the only valid romantic relationship it’s had outside of Pegasus sure is something.

Duke has managed to get inside Pegasus’ facility/Place Duke works at every single day. Incredible that he finally made it inside of his actual workplace. Whether he just found an open door or Metal Geared up a trash chute is undeclared, since that was all off screen between episodes, but maybe he has to do this like...all the time? Like heaven forbid Duke ever leave his phone at the office because this place seems iron clad and apparently there is absolutely no one he can call to let him in.

Like for reals isn’t Duke upper level management or something? Like a team director for an entire model of card game? Wtv, I guess he got demoted at some point and now he’s at the same level as a Google temp.

Duke used to air on international TV, just throwing that out there. He used to be a very big deal. Course, for all we know, maybe he also got locked out of his game store all the freakin time?

Anyway, he finds some random room he’s decided is the security room and uh...

Starts just mashing buttons.

I assume that he was just mashing the entire time it took for this duel to last, PS, because we all know that password, but does Duke? Is Duke, in fact, the only character left on this show that doesn’t know Pegasus’ password because he wasn’t there in most of S1?

(read more under the cut)

As Joey is playing Mai, he’s noticed that she is freaking out, but only intermittently. She’s going in between personalities like Yugi and Pharaoh.

In the show it makes it seem like she’s “Snapping out of it” as far as the Orichalcos’ effects go. But like...becoming a stumbling crying mess in between card draws is sort of like...not making Joey look like a good guy.

In fact, this episode goes out of their way to try and paint him a hero but they didn’t accomplish that. They start to. It starts to look like that. As Mai is breaking down, she loses her weird Oricalchos ability to no longer feel fear, and Joey takes the opportunity to try and get her to away from the dark side.

Thing is, the duel has already started so it’s kind of moot now since neither she nor Joey really know how to end the duel without killing the other. So it’s like he’s trying to reach out to her the only way he can since this duel wasn’t his choice anyway, but it is in a way that is killing both of them. Symbolism, I guess.

You know, it seemed like the show just needed a way to put a timer over Joey’s head and this was the only excuse they could give because the right thing to have done is just not play anything.

And that whole thing last episode where Pharaoh was like “there is ONE way out of this situation” I assumed would be about a tie. I kind of just assumed a tie would take place like between Kaiba and Alister...instead...it got weird.

First off, Valon--out of all people, Valon the drug card pusher of the wacky accent--decided to be more heroic than any of our heroes who are currently just gawking at a force field.

It’s been like 4 seasons since Yugi jumped and hung off the edge of a clocktower, only holding on by the point of his pyramid puzzle, and I keep seeing situations where we could see Yugi impress us yet again and instead he keeps his feet planted firmly on the ground while random ass Valon just shoots into the air like a rubber band.

Why didn’t I just assume that when Pharaoh said “I know how to beat this.” he meant to punch it directly in the face?

I’m pretty sure it’s an allusion to the fact that Oricalchos takes away your sense of fear that these three are constantly being huge idiots and jumping off ledges and out of airplanes but like...

...they are wearing a lot of padding, to be fair.

(I joke about Joey getting possessed as if he hasn’t been already)

And so Valon, this evil as hell villain who’s probably killed countless numbers of people up until now just starts freaking out about Mai. Like, a lot for this show. Like we even get a really awkward death squeeze. And like she ain’t even dead.

Almost like Severus Snape in that awkward Harry Potter Movie flashback, but Valon actually dated her once (I could go off about the Harry Potter movies but I’ll spare you.) It’s just every time Mai passes out there will be some man crying over her that she doesn’t even seem remotely aware of when she’s awake.

Like remember how Mai got engaged and she forgot? At the time I thought that was super weird but I’m starting to realize she probably just took a nap or something and then boom.

So although none of this is Raphael’s business, he’s so annoyed at Valon for possibly pissing off Darts that he decides to deflect his anger onto Pharaoh--who wasn’t even participating in this duel.

I mean Raphael wanted to kill Pharaoh anyway but it still feels like kind of a reach.

Speaking of reach...I miss our really good storyboarder. Check out that foreshortened hand. Man Yugioh, the whiplash from good to eh. It’s so much whiplash.

So, in a burst of green light, the three bikers vanish.

And I guess now they can just use Mai’s bike whenever, because it’s not like she’s gonna use it. But I doubt very much Tristan will remember that.

And so, this is about where this episode’s romance goes a little weird because Joey just...

Am I supposed to want Joey to break up Valon and Mai? Like I know one time Joey attempted to take a fireball for her (but didn’t, that was Pharaoh, who isn’t currently crying about Mai despite taking a fireball for her), and then another time Joey dueled Marik for her (and lost.) But like...then Joey lost touch with her for over a year and legitimately didn’t seem bothered until just now when she showed up.

Valon not only seems at least 2 years older than Joey, he’s also stuck around with her for longer than a week, which is much longer than the amount of time that Joey Wheeler has spent with her (while she was conscious). And listen I don’t ship, you know me, but I feel like the show isn’t doing a good job to convince me that Valon is anything but loyal to Mai. Just throwing that out there.

It just comes off that Joey is jealous and unable to cope with Mai being around another guy, when it’s like...Joey...Mai was gone for over a year. You can’t claim dibs anymore. It’s possessive this episode to a degree I don’t think the writers wanted to go. It feels like an accident that they wrote him like this.

I guess, story wise, Joey needs a reason to duel and be on this show--but why must it always gravitate around a girl who’s actually just fine without him?

Like Mai right now is a mess but she wants to be this mess. Personally I think he should respect her decision and give her space but I guess this show really wants to go the angle of “If your friend goes off the deep end, dive after them” to which I would like to say “or don’t.”

Like I think this is all on a case by case basis, but...Mai’s MURDERED people (and a gas station). Although one of them was Pegasus, who doesn’t count, this is still a situation where you should maybe avoid your friend and just call the cops already. If there has been a murder, especially if there’s been over 20 murders, it’s OK to finally call the cops. Mai is a SERIAL MURDERER, which should never mean “she can come back.”

I mean it’s not like any of these kids decided to start hanging out with Marik, right? And I mean they kinda all decided unanimously that maybe they should hold back chilling with Bakura? This should be old hat for them now. They’ve had to deal with the murderous betraying friend so many times. Why must Mai be so special?

But I guess that is Joey’s whole shpeal, isn’t it? That’s Joey’s magical superpower? He wouldn’t be friends with Yugi if he was bothered by his friend occasionally going Pure Asshole. And Joey did have a darker background himself (which is something the show keeps telling me but I have never actually seen because we haven’t seen it in Season Zero. Which honestly means I should do a Season Zero next because how long am I going to wait to watch that Joey backstory?)

So I guess I should stop being so practical about it, this is a fantasy story, and the fantasy of Joey Wheeler is that he can actually try to keep the people in his life from going topside and it actually works. The most magical person in all of Yugioh if that’s true because you ever try and change a drug addict? There’s a reason why they have therapists for that.

Speaking of topside,

Kaiba just shows up in the middle of a Joey meltdown and youknow what? He’s barely even that surprised that these guys are in San Fransisco crying on the floor of his ex-competitor’s lobby. He’s just so used to this.

And so, we’re all going to ignore Joey and just try not to notice Rex and Weevil and instead talk about cards.

Ps in the show Mokuba says his brother “swept the floor” of Alister when like...Seto nearly died multiple times. Mokuba’s so ready to lie his face off to save his brother’s face when like...no one asked. He just volunteered this information.

That and Mokuba might not actually know how this game is played (NO ONE REALLY KNOWS) and legitimately thinks his brother did really good in that card game. We still don’t know entirely what the title “Battle Commissioner” even meant and knowing this company it was probably a secret job made to hide lots and lots of illicit insider trading. Because we all know Mokuba wasn’t playing cards.

So, Yugi remembers that he has this key card that is a card with a key printed on it, and figures...it probably opens a door or something. That maybe they should do that thing they came to California to do, and since all (counts on fingers) 9 of them (10 if you count Pharaoh) are here, they may as well all do it together.

Meanwhile, every animator in that studio cried a single tear over the amount of bad hair they will have to shove into every frame between 9 of these people. Crowd scenes wow.

And what’s great about this next shot is that you have no idea which way Joey’s head is pointed. I dare you. take it in.

And so they all go up to the top floor with Duke Devlin while these two are just...still here.

Rex and Weevil are still here. Despite everything.

(forgive me if this is a joke I forgot I read off of tumblr once. I’ve been reviewing this show so long I just...I don’t remember what jokes I’ve already made)

(Also, I can’t believe they stuck in Rex and Weevil but didn’t put in Mokuba into this shot.)

So they open the cryptic door with the cryptic Keycard and enter...Pegasus’ room of toon suits.

I imagine he just pulls these out whenever there’s an event in the city, just like “Hell yes hell yes it’s Bay to Breakers time to be a parrot with boobs for some reason.”

(fun fact, despite the weather, SF is home to 3 clothes-optional beaches. You can see two of them from the Bridge.)

And so Pegasus decides to tell everybody what we already know. Rex and Weevil have overheard this, but they’re busy like...looking for trading cards in all these mascot suits. Whatever makes it easier for this team of animators. Like you never really think about it, but kid’s shows have just a hell ton of crowd scenes. Worse than a Marvel comic right here.

PS, if you are designing a comic or a drawn story of any degree--just never allow a party to be more than 4 people at a time, Kill off anyone you have to in order to make this happen, you’ll thank me later. Never EVER a draw a crowd scene. Once you do, then other people will think that you can draw crowd scenes, and you never, ever want anyone to know that.

It was nice of Pegasus to let Arthur Hawkin’s take the fame for Atlantis, I guess. But like...Pegasus just...he really doesn’t seem to care about the fate of humanity unless it inconveniences his card game.

Bro brought up “how much do you think Pharaoh even knows about America other than it’s a place across the sea that Rebecca lives? Like do you think that he has a good grasp on there being 7 continents?” and I’m guessing...not much. Course this is like a weird America with mesas and deserts in Napa so...I don’t know if the animators have a good grasp even.

Anyway, where do you think the key is?

And What do you think the key is?

So in the show Kaiba sees this card and goes “It’s a worthless card” (because I dunno maybe he forgot for the zillionth time that this was how he got turned into a playing card) and then Pharaoh replies “Maybe to you it is.” and like...

...You know the thought crossed Pharaoh’s mind.

To just put a little Seto in there.

Youknow, it took me 4 seasons but I can deffo see why and how Pegasus did it. If I were in Pegasus’ shoes, how long would it take me before the Kaiba kids are paper? Like 10-20 minutes tops? Especially with how completely insane Kaiba acts this episode?

And speaking of endless denial, Joey still hasn’t quite caught up to the plot.

He’s getting there, but he’s mentally still crying on the floor of the lobby.

Just Joey going all ham about a girl he hasn’t thought about in over a year. And then from the other side of the room, Kaiba is still coming to terms with Ep 2.

Like you have to hand it to Duke Devlin that not once in this entire series has he had a denial meltdown. Even Yugi had a denial meltdown (at several points) but Duke? Duke’s just winging it. Dukes just has no idea what’s happening or what he’s doing and is just winging it every second he’s been alive. He’d fit right into San Fransisco.

Like remember Duke hangs out in the bad parts of the Tenderloin for some reason, he deals with PG&E just deleting your power willy nilly and still making you pay for it, Comcast, Bay Area traffic, and, of course, the entire North Bay lighting on fire once a year, so he’s totally fine when it comes to cards.

And so Yugi, just unable to think of any solution to Kaiba being a wall just holds this up

And so with that, Kaiba has joined the party. I guess.

Well, back to eating this large stack of holiday cookies. Hope y’all have a good one--happy holidays!

It’s been a very weird year, but we’ve had some good news here in the States recently, I’m sure you all heard about it, that Inktober is legally unprofitable so now that means there will be nigh an Inktober ever again, and I am so stoked. I am so excited that the decade of hellish Inktobers is finally over.

That and the other stuff that happened but we won’t get into that ;)

Hopefully I’ll do another post before 2020 but I’m sort of in denial that 2020 is happening so I’m doing my best not to look at the calendar.

And if you just got here, this is where you can read my recaps in Chrono order from S1 Ep1

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wack-ashimself · 4 years

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So get this shit.

I live in low income housing. Rent is dependent on how much you earn. But it is usually 1/2 of your income.

I pay $346/month. If I make $200 more (or less) they adjust my rent. And it is NEVER EVER made so you could slowly afford to move to decent housing. I feel like I am paying for a glorified prison cell, just with more rec time.

Anyways, corna knocked us at work into high gear. It’s been like the holidays nearly non stop. We get a slow day here or there, but not many. So I have been getting about 4-5 more hours a week than usual for this time of year. And they gave us $2 hazard pay. Due to this happening at the EXACT MOMENT of my re certification for low income housing (it is my yearly ‘I got to prove I am still poor enough’) they went ‘you’re making more money, you owe us $60 more a month.’ WTF!? It was TEMPORARY! Asshats. Taking ANYTHING extra when you can. It’s not like my fucking apartment has improved. Or I suddenly cost more to house.

Then I watched as they hired a FUCK ton more people at work, and cut my hours.

Then tell me my hazard pay was done in less than a week.

My point? The federal, state, and local governments do the BARE FUCKING MINIMUM to help people out. I remember when I went for disability (partially blind, anxiety, etc), and it took THREE YEARS to get a hearing. And the whole time I was screaming ‘there’s people DYING because it takes 3 years to get a hearing.’

Here’s my simple rule to ALL governments: if you are not the best for everyone, covering the basics for everyone, in the most efficient means for everyone,

WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU GOOD FOR!?

ps-watch where to invade next. michael moore basically goes ‘okay, america is only good at war, so who can we invade and take their ideas on to improve america.’ A lot was schools, food, education, prisons, but my 2 favorite ones were all in france. Their kids meals for school look like a god damn 5 star restaurant. Their taxes when given out at the yearly audit show where EVERY penny you paid in taxes go. And for many of the other countries, prison was meant to help the prisoners reform and learn from their ways. GO FUCKING FIGURE!!!!

#where to invade next #michael moore #low income housing #pooer #poor #povertt #poverty #america #big lots

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peggysousfan · 5 years

Text

Agent Carter An Au Series

Here is Chapter 16! There’s a lot more of the show in this one to make up for 15 lol and some peggysous fluff in the beginning. Enjoy! :)

(PS. Tio means uncle lol)

Peggy's POV:

I wake up early in the morning, feed Steph, and go to the kitchen to make some tea. I notice Daniel still asleep on the couch, and he looks uncomfortable. Perhaps once we move he'll be able to sleep in his on bed again, and actually be comfortable. I can't believe I told him as much as I did last night, although it is a relief having some of it off my chest, I still wasn't ready for him to know all of that. I like Daniel, i really do, perhaps more than friends...but he showed me last night that he wasn't interested, or that he lost any interest he had. I never forgot the time in his room where we nearly kissed, our lips barely grazed the other...and yet I felt something; and I want to feel that spark again. Thats why, when I slip up and kiss his cheek, I try to compose myself or act as if it weren't a big deal. But last night he turned away from me, and I'm afraid that door is well and truly locked for good.

I look in the refrigerator for the milk to put in my tea, and I notice the label; Daisy Clover Dairy. Damn. I almost forgot I have to find the milk truck with nitramene that Branis stole. Ugh, its going to be a long week. I look over at Steph and she keeps wiggling around as if shes looking for something; or someone. I love how much she loves him, but once we leave I'm afraid of how she'll respond. I look over at Daniel and hes still fast asleep; then an idea pops in my mind. Perhaps its a bad one, but I do it anyway. I lift poppet up and place her on Daniels chest, and the second she realizes who he is, she snuggle against him and falls asleep. More and more am I amazed at how close they are. Its incredible. I can only imaging what her father would say or do if he knew how close Steph was with someone else. Knowing his obsessive and overbearing nature, he would probably get angry and try to prevent Daniel coming anywhere near her. But babies are good detectors of good people, and it seems Daniel is he best.

I hear a noise and look over at the sleeping pair. Daniel laid his arm over Steph to hold her close to him. All I can do is smile at the sight in front of me. If only I had a camera to capture this moment. Normally I wouldn't care for such things...but this is an exception. I turn away and sip my tea when I hear a noise; Daniel is starting to wake up.

"Mmm." He moves around and realizes hes not alone. "Uh, Hey little one. Where'd you come from?" I'm assuming he looks around, but I don't think he sees me. "How the hell did you get over here?" I see his head pop up from the couch and hold her closer. She rest her head on his chest and sleeps soundly.

"I'd be concerned if she were walking already." He looks up and finally notices my presence.

"Jesus Peg! You scared the hell outta me!" I laugh at his declaration. "How long has she..."

"Only a few minutes. She wouldn't sit still and kept looking around for you, so I placed her with you. And of course, she fell right back to sleep." He looks down at her and kisses her cheek.

"You are the sweetest thing ever." And I couldn't agree more.

"Can you believe she'll be 6 months in a few weeks? Because I can't!" I say.

"Seriously? Jeez.. Has it really been that long?" I nod my head and make my way to the couch, and i sit next to him.

"Indeed it has. Its only 5 weeks away, but it feels much shorter than that." He hands her over and she snuggles against me. "Well its about bloody time you little minx." He looks at me and laughs." I suppose she just needed to cuddle with Tio Daniel first."

"Tio Daniel!?"

"Or would you prefer....Godfather?" He leans back and looks at me, his eyes wide.

"Peg. Are you serious? You're not kidding?" I laugh and shake my head.

"So is that a yes?" He quickly leans over and embraces me and starts to lead towards my cheek, but stops himself.

"I don't mind, Daniel." I turn to him. "I do it to you, why should it be one way around." I say boldly. I know exactly why. Women do it as affection, or for thanks and gratitude, sometime its only a friendly gesture. But for men? Its meant for familiar family and spouses. He still looks afraid...I suppose I need to squash that. I lean over and place one hand on his cheek, and kiss the other. "See? no harm. We're very good friends, Daniel. It doesn't bother me." He still looks shocked and frozen.

"Yeah, uh..right. No, uh sorry. Your're right." Hes adorable when he gets like this, all awkward and stuttering, and I can't help but laugh.

"We should be getting ready. I have a feeling its going to be a long day at the office." At this he snaps out of whatever trance hes in and stands.

"Yeah, you're right. I should probably jump in the shower and get ready." I stand up as well and embrace him.

"I'll see you at the office." Steph reaches out one last time and gets her snuggles, and then we leave. I meet up with Jarvis and we look at the housing I will be staying at. Its one of Howard's quieter residencies; But I'm starting to have second thoughts. I take a delicious scone from the table as we continue to walk. As we tour the house and Jarvis describe the layout and such, I speak up.

"I can't stay."

"Mr. Stark insisted."

"But he also wants me to clear his name for multiple charges of treason. If anyone finds out I'm living in his house, I'll be fitted for the noose!"

"Well if it puts you at ease, this isn't one of him primary residences. He uses it more for...private entertaining."

"Its too risky."

"Well if you're sure you wouldn't like to see the master bedroom." Although I know this is a absolutely horrible Idea, I follow him anyway. When we enter the room, I fall in love. The bed is the most comfortable thing I have ever laid on.

"Perhaps a night or two won't kill us." He chuckles and give me the Intel he has on Leviathan; which is nothing at all. The SSR had nothing on them either. The only lead we have in the milk company that has a truck full of nitramene. Jarvis asked about the foreign agents with the odd throats and I explained that the New York hospitals had no record of Laryngotamy patience in the last 3 years."So I've got 2 foreign agents, with no voice boxes, fighting over a milk truck full of experimental implosives. "

"Just another day at the office"

"Ugh, I wish." I explain when the Daisy Clover opens and how I plan on infiltrating it and finding the truck. He insist on waiting with the car, but I tell him no. Hes already been through enough danger. As we have this conversation I explore the room, and when I get to the wardrobe...I am astounded. I'm not sure a theater has as many costumes as Howard does. But the white coat will prove useful. Soon after I hand Steph over to Jarvis, I head to get some work done

When I get there at the Daisy Clover, I use my American accent and a pair of glasses, and the white overcoat as a disguise. I confront the manager and say that there have been many complaints and I am one of them. I go on a rant and scare him enough to get him to cooperate; not many men like a bossy women and it can intimidate them. It seems like forever that I've searched this entire bloody place, but theres no sign of gamma rays or the truck. I look at the paper and notice a truck is missing.

"We've had a guy out sick the past two days. He uses his truck to commune."

"Has he never heard of a bus? Name and address."

"Sheldon McFee, but I don't have an address."

"Leave that to me." I storm off the property, but not without doing some proper inspector work. I shout to put air in one or the tires, and then leave.

Daniel's POV:

I can't believe Peggy wants me to be Stephanie Godfather! And she addressed me as Tio Daniel to Steph...I honestly can't believe that just happened. But of course I ruined the moment by trying to kiss her again. I know she doesn't mind it, but I do. I still can't forget the time in my room when we almost kissed; thats and all the times shes kissed my cheek or my hand. I felt this...spark, and yet we barely grazed our lips against each other. Its torture having these feelings and not letting them out. I really like Peggy, as more than friends, but I know shes probably not ready for that sort of thing right now; and besides she has a kid. Even though I love that kid as if she were my own, shes not. I'll never be able to be her dad, and I think thats what hurts the most. It'll be worse when they find somewhere to move, I won't be able to see them as much; especially Steph.

When I know Peggy is gone I go to my room and look for something to wear after I get out of the shower. But the only clean shirt I have left is the one Steph ripped. Dammit. Guess this will have to do. I jump in the shower and get dressed, and once I'm done, I drink some coffee and head to the office. Peg isn't here yet, but I don't expect her to be; I know shes looking to see if he can stay with the sitters for a while. I know she hates the idea of house jumping, but its the only option she has that lets her live with her daughter. I would say Steph could stay with me while Peggy came by my apartment and stayed for her free time while she worked or was at the Hotel for woman. But I also work and can't watcher her 24/7. I feel horrible that I can't help out more...

"Hey Sousa! What happened to you? Did you get mugged?" Krisminski Laughs.

"What?" I ask.

"Well, your shirt is ripped. So I asked if you got mugged? I mean, Its not like you can fight back with one leg."

"Hey, whoa. We don't know if it was some low life thieves out to steal a gimps money. Maybe it was that girl hes been rushing off to see... Am I right Sousa?"

"Shut up, Thompson." I go to my desk and start looking through the files we have on Stark. I look up at the clock and notice Peggy isn't back yet, and its almost 9:15. Where is she? Maybe I'm the only one whos noticed, but shes always here five till 9; always. I keep looking at the files, but can't help but look at the clock. And then she arrives. Thank God. When she walks by my desk she smiles, but then looks at me confused. She makes a small gesture to my shirt, and I nod, then she laughs softly; she knows its the same one Steph ripped. Hours go by and I get bored, so I look at the horse race chart.

"Whiteby's Prospect. Third Race." I turn round and see Peggy looking over my shoulder, her coat in hand.

"You sure?" I smirk. I know she doesn't really care about these things. Once when I was home and she came in, she noticed the races and laughed at me. She said it was a waste of time and money, and that most of the races were probably rigged.

"Not at all, thats why they call it gambling." We smile at the each other and then I circle her suggestion.

"I have to pop out for a moment, personal matters. Cover for me?" My first thought is somethings wrong with Step. I lower my voice, so no one else can hear.

"Is everything okay with..." At first shes confused, then she gets it.

"Oh! No of course not, thats...no everything's fine in that regard." I sigh of relief. Peggy quickly reaches out and rubs my back comfortingly. "You'd be the first to know if something were wrong, Daniel. I assure you." I nod my head again and smile.

"Okay, good to know." She smiles and leans one hand on the back of my chair.

"So will you do it...?"

"Sure, but you'd own me one." She smiles again and Agent Mills hands me the photos from Spider Raymond's club. "Hey, Thanks a bunch." Peg asks about the folder and I tell her, then she offers to help me look for the woman who killed Raymond. Weird... "I thought you said you were leaving?"

"Oh well-"

"Hey Sousa, you're needed in the basement." Krisminksi says.

"I'm kind of busy"

"Well now you're extra busy. I got a ten ton ball of rocks and garbage with your name on it." God I hate this guy.

"Alright alright, just give me a minute." I put the folder away and the paper with the race. Then turn to Peggy. "Guess I'm gonna miss that race."

"Its probably for the best." She says. Kriskminski orders Peggy to file some reports, so I guess she doesn't get to leave. I hope it wasn't too important.

Peggy's POV:

"I see. Yes, Yes, Perfect. Thank you." I finally was able to gather the information and address of Sheldon McFee. Hopefully I'll be able to find the truck of Nitramene an turn in into the SSR; maybe then I'll get a break around here. I grab my coat and glance at Daniel before I leave. What is he doing? He has something hidden under a file that hes looking at. Gambling on Horse racing. Men...I take a guess and he listens to me, God he is a mess. I tell him that I need to leave on personal matters, and he automatically got worried about Stephanie. I don't think I can adore him any more for that. If anything were wrong with her, not only would I rush out of the this building, but I would grab Daniel and force him to come with me. Hes the first person I would come to if something were to ever happen to my daughter.

As I start to leave, I'm called for me reports to file. The bloody buffoons I work with are so idle. I look around, and make sure no one is watching me, and then I hurry to Chief Dooley's office to make a call; no trace. And he answer.

"I don't have long, so I need you to listen very carefully. I need you to dispose of Howard's car."

"I beg your pardon?" Jarvis says.

"The SSR are looking into Roxxon at this very moment at car sustained damage at the site, and is likely to be teeming with Vita Radiation. Make it disappear." He huffs, but agrees.

"Very well. The linens should be done in the wash in 30 minutes-"

"Now."I say. He asks about the Dairy truck and I give him the Intel I've found and then end the call. I have to know if my face is in any of those photos. This could ruin my career, get Steph taken from me, and... cost me everything with Daniel.

Hours later, when the coast is clear, around lunch, I stop eating the Orange Daniel gave me and sneak over to his desk. But of course nothings ever that easy. The phon on my desk rings, and then the one on Daniels; and I hit my head "Bloody Hell" I whisper aloud. That wasn't suppose to happen.I peak my head from the Desk and see Daniel coming my way. Dammit. I sneak back over to my desk as he answers the phone. Chief Dooley wants me to bring the Vita Ray Detector to the main Roxxon office.

"What was that about?" Daniel asks.

"Oh, just another errand." I reply as I walk away. I go to the file room and pick it up from where I pout it back this morning and then leave for Roxxon.

"Carter about time." Dooley says. Wanker...

"Oh! I didn't know our government had such good taste in secretaries. Whats your name, Darling?"A man says, I'm assuming is Mr. Jones.

"Agent." I say simply. i hand over the detector to Dooley and say I will see him at the office, but he has other ideas.

"Yeah we could use your help" Thompson says. I'm sure you do.

"It wouldn't be for filing would it." I retort.

Dooley explains that the vita rays could still be on the person that handled the nitramen. He wants me to stay and check the woman in the facility because a man doing it isn't appropriate. God help me...I rush to the restroom to make sure none of the Vita rays are on me form when I had infiltrated the other facility and found Branis. Turns out I do. "Sorry Nana." I throw away the watch my grandmother had given to me before she died. I wasn't particularly close with her, but I was closer to her than my mum. She always encouraged my adventurous side and never forced me to learn to 'be a lady'.

Mr. Jones gathers up his employees and they stand in a long line to be tested. For a while there was nothing and i thought this whole thing was pointless, but then I see him. The man who helped Branis make the nitramen bombs. Thompson tests him, but he comes back clear. I ask him to stop walking away and ask Jones about the uniforms. Vita rays hardly saturate a persons skin, but clothing is tainted for longer, and when I suggest to check the locker rooms, Van Ert makes a run for it; and Dooley and Thompson chase him. Men are so quick to act rather than think. I take the stairs and beat him to the lobby.

"May I?" I ask as I take a mans brief case. I take it and wack Van Ert in the legs, and he falls to his feet. Thompson puts him and handcuffs and Dooley watches, out of breath. How he can be sweating this much is beyond me. "May I be pf any further assistance?" I ask. Once he is apprehended we leave to the SSR.

When we enter the SSR, I notice Daniel hard at work, and I catch myself from smiling. He works so hard and yet no one notices his efforts. Our eyes meet and I tilt my head for him to follow, and he does. We watch chief start to interrogation, but I'm not completely paying attention. I look over t him and see his shirt still torn, and i laugh.

"What?" He looks puzzled.

"Your shirt." I point and he looks down and laughs

"Yeah, uhm...its the only one I had left that was clean."

"I'm still sorry that happened,I-I still can't believe it."

"Its not your fault, Peg. Things happen." I hum in agreement.

"Have any of the boys noticed?" I ask. But he doesn't answer. "Daniel?"

"Yeah, but its nothing."

"What did they say?" He turns away from me and watches Dooley. "Daniel. What did they say?" Now I'm getting angry.

"It doesn't matter, Pe-

"Yes it does. It matters to me. What. Did. They. Say." He glances at me, quickly, and then back at Dooley. I reach out to him and hold his hand. "Daniel..."

"They just...thought I got mugged by some thieves..."

"And...?" He shakes his head and refuses to continue. I grab his shoulders and force him to face me, but he doesn't look at me. I place my right hand under his chin and my left in his cheek. "What aren't you telling me?" I ask gently. He takes a deep breath and speaks.

"They said that I got mugged by thieves..."I raise my brow, "Becasue I can't defned myself with one leg."

"What!?" He tries to shuh me to not bring any attention "No. I will not 'Shh' What else?"

"Pegs-"

"What. Else?"I place my hands on my hips; now I'm fuming.

"The other wasn't so bad..." Again I raise my brow. "He said that...it was a woman who did it." I know hes still holding back. "I can't win with you can I?"

"Never." I say and he laughs.

"He said that it was the woman that 'I've been rushing to meet' for the past 2 weeks."

"What woman?" Daniel's seeing someone?I had no idea.But I suppose it makes sense as to why he turned away from me last night...

"No one. There isn't one, I swear" I hadn't realized I was holding my breath, that is, until I released it. "No need to look so relieved." Damn.

"Sorry I-"

"I'm just messing with you, Peggy." I smile and shove him playfully.

"Arse." Before we know it, Dooley walks in the room and watches Thompson beat on Van Ert. If talking doesn't work, brute force does. He sends me home because 'lady's shouldn't e seeing this' As if I haven't seen worse during the war. I glance at Daniel and smile; one more night before Steph and I go to Howard's old house. I'll miss Daniel...

#peggysous #peggy carter #daniel sousa #Peggy x Daniel #agent carter #agent carter series #au fanfic #fanfiction

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egotisticalgold · 5 years

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(Part 2) seem to find a man attractive and interesting enough to do so. Im also very introverted and you know, once you get used to spend much of your time on your own you're not tend to go toward people. I really feel like Im stuck and I cant discover that part of my life. My lower chakras are so closed, I want some spontaneity and sensation in my life I just don't know how to bring it to reality. It makes me feel kinda lame and stuck up, I feel like Im missing out. Idk what to do Im lost ngl..

Hey darling, don’t rush it. Don’t rush yourself, trust yourself. Trust your intuition, you haven’t had sex yet because it’s not meant to happen. You’re 20 and honestly if I am to tell you the honest goddamn truth, I wish I saved my virginity for when I actually felt ready to explore my sexuality with someone I trust that understands my need to wait and need for gentleness. I don’t believe you need to be doing the same thing as everyone else, if you were, would that make you happy? To feel included? But would you be betraying a part of yourself for the sake of fitting in? I lost my virginity for the sake of fitting in and honestly, it changed nothing in my life but now it gave a craving for sensuality and connection. If you feel like something’s genuinely wrong with you and that’s why you haven’t had sex yet, then take it to prayer or write about or just question yourself why 5 times until you reach the root of your resistance. The fact that you know you haven’t met anyone attractive or interesting TO YOU then, what’s the real rush? Don’t fill a hole with something that will impact your future or the way you view yourself. Dig into the hole, perhaps life is calling you to find another way to activate and open up your chakras and yourself creatively. There’s more than one way to be sensual and creative in a fulfilling way. Dig deep, find something that feeds you the same a casual hookup would. If you wanna start going on dates, I think that’s a beautiful first step before you jump the gun so to speak lol. Download a dating app or start pushing yourself to talk or smile at that stranger you’re drawn to. Allow life to flow through you, experience your sexuality through your style, your taste, your way of being. Fulfill yourself, pleasure yourself!!!!! In hindsight I didn’t really know how to fully pleasure another and be present during sex if I didn’t really learn to please myself first. Get comfortable looking at yourself naked or in a sexual way, build yourself up. My advice to you is to just give yourself time to flourish but ALLOW yourself to which means making decisions that feel right to you. And PS the only thing you’re missing out on is making love to a person you have a genuine deep connection with that wants nothing more than your growth and that my dear doesn’t come nearly as often as we’d like.

#questions

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estelwenadia · 5 years

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WangXian's “We catch the same bus home and I always fall asleep, but you always wake me up at my stop” AU

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

Part 5:

With Shijie well on the way to full recovery and his bank account not so empty anymore (Jin ZiXuan had refunded his money just as he had promised and Wei Wuxian suddenly became wei richer), Wei Wuxian gamely resigned from his two other jobs but kept his work at Wen Qing's café (because Lan Zhan always came by in the morning to get his usual caffeine fix - which was Wei Ying's Lan Zhan's Special for that day)

That also meant he had more time to spend with Lan Zhan.

"Hey, Lan Zhan!" Wei Wuxian greeted him one day, over lunch. Lan Zhan's meal was his usual bland diet, but he had ordered red hot dishes for Wei Wuxian, much to Wei Wuxian's delight.

Lan Zhan raised his golden eyes to look at him.

"We have met before, haven't we?" Wei Wuxian asked, scrunching his brows, "When we were in high school, right? Why can't I remember?"

Lan Zhan calmly sipped his soup. "Why is your memory so bad?"

"It's because my memory is bad, that's why I'm asking you!" Wei Wuxian whined.

Lan Zhan decided to pity him, so he said flatly. "Library Pavilion. Punishment."

Wei Wuxian blinked. At those words suddenly elusive memories came rushing back.

So much had happened after he had graduated from high school. The death of his adopted parents, Shijie's hospitalization, and then ultimately, the severance of ties between himself and Jiang Cheng.

It was of no wonder he didn't remember anything that had happened before he had graduated school. The trauma of everything that he had gone through must have cancelled or blocked out part of his memories.

But now, everything was going to be just fine so those memories were gradually returning.

Shamelessly Wei Wuxian re-enacted the scene from a particular fond memory.

"Wangji?"

"Lan Wangji?"

"Lan Zhan? Or maybe, Lan Gongzi? Oh, I know! Lan Er Ge!"

Averting his gaze back to his soup, Lan Zhan muttered, "Ridiculous."

But the tips of his ears reddened, and even the bowl couldn't hide his flushed cheeks.

Wei Wuxian laughed, bright and easy. "Oh Lan Zhan, you were so cute back then! So fun to tease! Your reactions were adorable!"

Lan Zhan fixed him a look. "Were not. You were annoying."

"Heh," Wei Wuxian didn't even try to deny it. He knew he was annoying. "But you still like me anyway!"

He opened his mouth to take in a spoonful of stew. Just as he emptied the spoon, he thought he heard Lan Zhan murmur, "Yes."

Wei Wuxian nearly spat out the food. Swallowing thickly, he croaked, "What?"

Lan Zhan refused to answer. He stared resolutely at his food. It was as though he had lost his courage to talk.

Lan Zhan... liked him?

But all Lan Zhan had ever shown him was how much Lan Zhan was annoyed and irked by his mere presence.

But then again...

Mind reeling with possibilities, Wei Wuxian tried again, "How long?"

Lan Zhan looked at him then. "Cave of Xuanwu."

Wei Wuxian blinked.

Oh. Their school had organised a four day three night camping trip during their summer break. Most notable moments were the archery competition (which he was so sure Lan Zhan hated him when he accidentally removed Lan Zhan's hair tie - a flowy white ribbon adorned with elegant blue cloud patterns), music competition (Lan Zhan won in this with his epic guqin skills, but Wei Wuxian snagged second place, so it's not so bad. Wei Wuxian still remembered how they astounded everyone with their impromptu duet of dizi and guqin at the campfire during a truth or dare game).

And then there was the incident at the Cave of Xuanwu.

Their assigned group (Lan Zhan, Jiang Cheng, Nie Huaisang, Jin ZiXuan, Mian Mian and himself) were exploring the area nearby when a terrible storm suddenly broke. They immediately sought shelter in the cave. Barely minutes later, lightning had struck the cave's entrance, collapsing it. Trapped in an area with no signal, they had no way to contact for help so they ventured deeper into the cave to look for another way out.

It was difficult trekking through the dark, muddy cave. Jiang Cheng had taken the lead, with Lan Zhan in the middle and himself bringing up the rear. Mian Mian had slipped and nearly fell into the murky depths of the cave ravine, but Wei Wuxian had managed to grab her and pull her to safety. He had hurt his arm in the process.

He waved off everyone's concern and together they trudged on deeper into the cave.

Just when they were about to despair, they chanced upon a river, with fresh maple leaves floating on it. Lan Zhan said that there was a way out afterall.

Jiang Cheng and himself, being the best swimmers in the group, entered the water to look for the way out. With his hurting arm, Wei Wuxian wasn't able to swim for very long, and he only made it worse by swimming. Luckily Jiang Cheng had found the way out, so he told Jiang Cheng to guide everyone to safety, and that he would be coming along shortly.

But he hadn't been planning to follow them at all. His arm was hurting too badly and he could already feel fever sinking its claws into his skin.

Little did he expect Lan Zhan to stay behind with him.

While awaiting for rescue, he was delirious and weak from fever, but he could clearly remember lying on something so soft and comfortable, being lulled to sleep by a gentle humming.

"No wonder you gave me such a weird look when you first came to the café!" Wei Wuxian exclaimed, "I was humming that song when making your drink!"

Lan Zhan acquiesced that with a nod. "You look... different."

"Yeah," self-consciously Wei Wuxian brushed the bangs away from his eyes. "I cut it short, then. It is a little longer now!" He now had his hair up in a messy bun. "Don't worry. I will grow out my hair for you, okay, Lan Zhan?"

Lan Zhan nodded, smiling minutely. "Mn.

- while waiting for bus -

"Lan Zhan?"

When Lan Zhan turned to look at him, Wei Wuxian looped his red and black scarf around Lan Zhan's neck.

"This is for you," Wei Wuxian beamed. "Because you gave me your blue scarf."

For a moment Lan Zhan stared at him. "It is not necessary."

Even as he said that, he was carefully clutching the scarf, his face was a faint display of childlike wonder.

The sight nearly stole Wei Wuxian's breath away.

"Do you know when I realized that I like you, Lan Zhan?" Wei Wuxian asked softly.

Lan Zhan shook his head.

Wei Wuxian smiled at him. "In the bus. When you first woke me up before I reached my stop. I was still drowsy with sleep, and when I opened my eyes and saw you, you were the most beautiful person I ever laid my eyes on. I thought an angel had descended from the heavens, for me. My guardian angel. And then, ever since you stepped into my life again, my life has turned out for the better. Shijie is recovering well, I am getting along with Jin XiZuan and his nephew, and my relationship with Jiang Cheng has started to slowly mend. So, really, thank... "

Before he could finish speaking the phase, Lan Zhan's lips were suddenly on his, silencing him immediately.

He still could not speak even after Lan Zhan broke off the kiss.

"Wei Ying," Lan Zhan's voice was so soft, so warm. "Between us, there is no need for any thank you and sorry."

Stupefied, Wei Wuxian stared at him.

Lan Zhan gently took Wei Wuxian's hands in his. "Because the last time you said those words to me, we did not see each other for a long time. Any news of you I managed to get hold of, was not good news."

Wei Wuxian wanted to cry. "Lan Zhan..."

Their bus arrived then.

From then on, they took the same bus home, hand in hand. Sit on the same seat, and Wei Wuxian occasionally sleeping on Lan Wangji's shoulder. When Lan Wangji woke him up, it's for the stop they got off together.

(PS: There will be a bonus scene! 😁)

#mdzs #mo dao zu shi #the grandmaster of demonic cultivation #wei wuxian #wei ying #lan wangji #lan zhan #jiang yanli #jin ling #jiang cheng #jin zixuan #fan fic #fanfic #not beta'd #not beta read #alternate universe #modern au #wangxian #estelwenadiafics

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le-petitmort · 5 years

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Part II – This thing is about to be a thing

In one-point-four seconds I came to the realization that I am quite literally…the dumbest motherfucker ever. First, I never got her digits. Second…I never got her digits. Disgraceful. Where was my situational awareness? It was akin to a scrawny defender putting pressure up court on the opposing team’s guard, not paying attention and running smack dab into a pick set by a seven foot chiseled like a bronze formed by the hands of Donatello, NBA center. Basketball metaphors…get used to them.

Anyway, it knocked the wind out of my sails. The reason being is that I had formulated this grandiose plan for her to make the first move beyond the first move. To engage the conversation. Open the forum. Get the small talk out the way. Allowing me to pitter patter and tiptoe my way past the threshold of awkwardness and straight to the glory road of getting to know her intimately.

By intimately, I’m not talking about straight to boom, boom, out go the lights carnal skullduggery complete with passionate wet kisses, heavy petting and cock to pussy communication. I was angling for dinner first. Not wine, dine and sixty-nine dinner either. I had it built up in my head that I was going to treat this one like a lady. Later on, I could whisper filthy invitations in her ear that would make her coo, as my hand deftly slid up her thigh towards paradise. Getting to that point would be the hard part. Or maybe not.

Maybe, I had put this particular pussy on a pedestal. Perhaps she was a cum guzzling cock whore who jumped bed to bed trolling for fat cock in the ocean of fuckery that is Brooklyn?

Mayhap, she was one of those chicks who secretly delved into her passionate side by stroking the kitty by the light of her iPhone to kinky images on tumblr. Trolling for virtual cock with selfie side boob action, a toothy smile of seduction and a user name like…say…wantonbabygirldreamsandtequilamemories.

Perchance, all that was completely off base and she was raised right by her parents. A pristine catholic girl with of heart and mind of gold, devout in her love of our lord and savior Jesus Christ who would be spending good Friday getting ashes thumbed on her forehead…or whatever it is Catholics do on that religious day. I’m agnostic so, I have zero idea and I highly doubt she’s Ms. Goodytwoshoes since I had already noted in passing that she likes a smoke and a cocktail in the evening. Plus, she wears those fancy stocking that scream “unwrap me Daddy and see the present beneath”.

Let’s get back on point. This is how much I’ve thought into her. The epitome of pussy on a pedestal syndrome. Now, we’ve had an actual conversation. Albeit, a very short conversation. Brevity is sometimes good…except when you don’t get the digits.

The face to face was going to have to happen. Overcoming my fear of ineptitude and delving into my inner rico suave. A little more toned down though, than an unbuttoned white shirt to the navel, smooth talking lothario schtick. But, more than simply me. Yep, this girl has me all sorts of fucked up.

You’re probably wondering, “what’s with all the self-loathing, dude?”. I admit it’s got to be a bit of a turn off so, here’s the back story. No, I am not a virgin who sprawls across the couch in my jockey’s eating flamin’ hot Cheetos whilst penning dirty poems to lewd images on tumblr under a username such as…bigdongdaddysearchingforhootchiecocksluts. I’m also not the kind of man who walks into a room, drawing in beautiful, leggy, big busted vixens like steel to a magnet. I’m somewhere in the middle.

A relationship failure who gets too wrapped up in his work. Which can come off as neglectful to a significant other. But, I’ve had a plan since I was eighteen that I’d be retired on a beach in Mexico by the time I was forty, with my gorgeous wife and two adorable children playing in the sand as I sip a corona and reminisce about all the good times.

You see, I like plans. I don’t like flying by the seat of my pants. Life is analytical. Meant to be linear with a point A, B, C and onward. Peaks and valleys are for the weak. Which is why, when I first spied my dream girl promenading down the crooked sidewalks of Williamsburg, I stopped the initial urge to go in for the kill and went with formulation of a process. Fucking up in love multiple times will do such things to a man.

The plan was off though, for now. I wasn’t going to be able to slap another ”call me, maybe” note on her morning coffee to pique interest. That was already done. Mutual admiration and quite possibly mutual eye fucking were already in play. She had said it herself! Not so much in those words. But, I’d been noticed. How had I not noticed her noticing me? I really am daft at this shit…or maybe I need a lightning bolt of confidence in my life?

Is this moment it? Is that all I needed was the knowledge that there was a connection from across the room that I hadn’t felt? Was there truly distant simpatico? Was kismet closer than the vacuum of my unsure, fearful mind? Do we already have a thing for each other?! Holy fuck. These are the questions whirring in my head at 5 AM. Just like the ceiling fan spinning full speed above my bed. I’m one hundred twenty miles an hour of jubilation and angst. As much as I pride myself on a linear lifestyle, I climb to the mountain summit and hurl myself into a canyon of doubt with every passing second spent thinking about her.

I can hear the city coming to life. The traffic beginning to snarl. The metal clank of bodega doors rolling open. A single bird stationed on it’s perch singing.

I should be ambling into my office, coffee cup in hand starting my so-called work day. Instead I’m counting the minutes before I jump in the shower, clean up and go finish business with my future paramour. Yes sir, I’m forcing myself to project a dose of swagger. Laying here, mean mugging like an NBA power forward who just euro-stepped his way to a thundering game-changing dunk. I’m a winner, baby! Shelve that pitiful shit, bruh. You da man! Get fuckin’ fired up!

Which is why I basically pimp walked my way to the coffee shop when the time came for action. Outfit: casual. A hoodie from my alma mater, jeans with a strategic knee rip, green Nike air force ones on my feet. I popped straight through the shop door towards the familiar blonde at the counter like I owned the place. Ya boy iz in da house! Woof, woof, woof!

“Large straight black and a skinny latte, please.” I winked, expecting she’d question why I was getting two drinks instead of one.

She went straight to brewing and giving me the inflated total. “Twelve even. Name, please.” Ok, babe, maybe you don’t understand that lives are about to change in mere minutes. A whole cosmic galaxy is about to open up. Astronomers like Neil Degrasse Tyson will be talking about the cavalcade of stars falling out of the sky because two lips met at an overpriced local coffee shop in Brooklyn. Guess I’m getting ahead of myself there.

“Stephen…with a P.” I responded.

Apprehension and giddiness course through me. Giddiness seems unmanly but, my excitement isn’t. I’m bouncing heel to toe as our drinks magically appear before me. I check my phone one last time. Knowing her punctuality, we are currently at T minus 2 minutes and counting. Ps. I am not a stalker…to reiterate.

I grab the steaming drinks and fly towards the door, nearly tumbling over a shorty with her nose buried her phone. No time for apologies, I must nail down a cozy table on the sidewalk. I want this first meeting to be something the entire five boroughs of New York stops in awe to witness.

But, there she is coming through the door just as I reach for it. The coffees are in one hand and I can feel them about to crash right into her. I swivel my wrist, going for the save. No fucking way am I flinging a skinny latte across the object of my forever affections. Fuck no. Shit. There it goes. Whoa…steady as she goes. Eye widening panic! Boom goes the dynamite! My fingers grip the cups harder and safely held. Crisis averted.

Cool and casual like that. “Here you go Iona.” I handed over her drink with a smile.

“Iona?” She looked at me puzzled.

My eyes darted, alarmed. “Uh, yesterday…when you made your order here. Uh…you told the cashier your name was Iona?” Now it was time for my own quizzical. “Your name is Iona…right?”

She blew out a breath. The kind that shoots upward, blowing a dangling strand of her bangs from her rolling at being caught in a fib eyes. “That’s a thing I do. To sound exotic.” She gave a quick shake of the head and nodded to the counter. “I change it up every day. Glenda, Marion, Billie Jean...Iona. Whatever I’m feeling like that day.”

Her hand casually reached for a true introductory shake. “My real name is Tuesday…and I already know you’re Stephen…with a P.”

My smile was contemplatively wry. “Isn’t Tuesday an exotic enough name already? I mean…I’ve never met a Tuesday.”

“Yeah, well, a girl has to have many faces. One must stay intriguing and beguiling.”

“I’m intrigued and beguiled.” I shot back. Somehow feeling comfortable in my skin for a change.

The corners of her lips curved. “Mutual.”

Relaxation immediately struck. My entire being at ease. A wordless infinity.

“But, I’m sorry Stephen. Much as I’d like to sit down and get to know you, I have to be to work in five minutes. I’m all about a strict schedule.” Nice! She really is perfection.

“I completely understand that.”

Tuesday fished a hand into her oversized tote, withdrawing a business card which she handed over. “I neglected to leave you my number last night. I was a little jittery over it all…well...you know.” Our eyes locked. Mesmerizing. “Will you call me for dinner?” She questioned as if there was some sort of doubt.

“Absolutely.” I opened the door, leading her through. Two fingers steadied at the small of her back. Feeling a response as Tuesday’s back comfortably adjusted.

She turned to me on the street, one last parting moment. Words breaking apart the sweetest lips I’d ever laid eyes on. “Thanks for latte. I like a man who gets me coffee in the morning…cliché, I know.”

“The pleasure was all mine.”

Tuesday paused, giving thought to one last message. “Just so you know…I don’t do personal calls or texts during the work day. So, don’t bother. I’m married to my career. I have a plan.”

I gave the thumbs up. Fucking perfection.

-bart 4.20.2019

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