#and i tried to choose two examples where i myself don't fall on the same side of the argument

[protoindoeuropean]

in discussions of culture—cultural identity, preservation of culture and so on—, one thing i think is often unjustifiably assumed or unquestioned is the rigidity of culture in question

i say "unjustifiably assumed" even though of course for a culture to be a coherent concept through time, it is justified to expect certain elements to be maintained (in tandem) so that it's still recognizably identified as the development of the same culture, even as it is constantly changing. what i mean is that sometimes people shut down arguments or discussions (often on more sensitive topics) regarding culture as attempts at erasing cultures— while unjustifiably assuming their rigidity, which i, for one, do not subscribe to. and to be sure, discussions can be had about where the limits to how much a culture can change before it loses its identity are and so on (even should be had), but without this assumption that any change of culture is tantamount to an attempt at its erasure

this is best exemplified when there's a clash between a guiding ethical principle and a cultural practice. bodily autonomy : genital mutilation, animal rights : animal sacrifice etc. i think that deeming any argument against a cultural practice as an attempt at erasing a culture is wrong and that's (at least in part) because i think that it is wrong—even kinda disrespectful—to assume that those cultures couldn't accommodate changes to those practices

(it's obviously even more misguided to characterize those kinds of general arguments as discriminatory against a specific culture, but that's another thing)

[trans-androgyne]

I don't really do this like at all but I have no idea where else to express my frustrations and dejection. This is pretty negative so no need to even read it but If you do I really appreciate it. I'm a transmasculine teenager and I remember first coming to tumblr from reddit cause I heard there was more transmasculine folks here and I was like waooww! Sounds great. I expected cool memes or positivity or representation just something I could relate to because I genuinely hated myself for being trans, so much. Can't come out at school, can't transition for like another four years, can't entirely come out to family either, so I can seek solace online. Now tumblr has become by #1 doomscroll site and I hate myself more than ever for newer reasons. Wooow. And this time it's coming from other queer people and it feels worse than anything I read from a genuine right-wing bigot. I keep feeling like my existence is just irrational and misogynistic and hopeless. I don't know how to feel any better about my identity as a transgender male.

Gods, I've been in really similar spots, I'm so sorry. Seeing the same old vitriol from cis transphobes is one thing. But when I stumbled into the discourse about transmascs on here, feeling that hated and rejected by my fellow queer and trans people pushed me to the brink of detransitioning. There are two main ways I pushed through that.

The first was to focus on other transmascs. Sure, I can hate myself for "choosing the wrong side" or whatever, but would I ever, ever say that about another transmasc? I wouldn't. I would never tell them half the stuff I believed about myself. It became clear to me that queer masculinity, especially trans masculinity and manhood, gets pushback both from inside and outside the queer community that it does not deserve. One's gender and gender presentation does not relate to their morality. Queer masculinity is beautiful and radical, no matter what anyone tries to tell you, and I let myself fall in love with it and engage in it out of spite. Even if I couldn't accept it on myself, I committed myself to letting other transmascs out there know that I believed their transmasculinity made the world a better place. After a while, it was a little easier to feel that way about myself too. I still get insecure about it, but I can always lean on other transmascs and transmasc allies about it.

That's the second strategy. I felt so isolated and alone as a transmasc, especially when we were being blamed for predstrogen being banned, that I ended up making a discord server centered on trans men and mascs. I've gotten so many friends and even two new partners out of that! It turns out that there are plenty of people who love transmasculinity even if they aren't transmasc themselves. An example is my trans femme S.O. who loves me being her transmasc stone butch and praises my masculinity constantly :) I suggest to all transmascs ever to surround themselves with as many people as they can that see the value of transmasculinity and don't hold bigoted beliefs about transmascs (because yes, believing that we're all annoying and attention-seeking and self-centered and misogynistic is bigoted). My server is always open if that might help you, but other spaces are out there as well. Just know you deserve to be supported in your identity and there are plenty of people who would give you that support. You are always, always, always welcome in my inbox, or DMs, or anywhere else. Please reach out if I can be of any help.

[painting-warhammer]

C’Tan Shard of the Deceiver in the style of Sonichu (CWC)

I lied. This is my favorite figure. Commentary under cut.

#1: Rule Number One Is That You Gotta Have Fun

The other two figures I painted had ups and downs--days genuinely ruined and many frustrated moments where I just hated everything about this hobby and everything I was making. I'm sure this is no strange feeling to any artist, but since I kinda gave up on art over a decade ago only to pick this up after that decade, it really felt like that heartbreaking moment of making something that you know was bad and not improving fast enough.

I never had that for one second while painting Sonichu. I honestly giggled to myself a lot when I worked on him. When something fucked up (note how I didn't make as good of a glowing effect on the eyes) I just took that as "Well, that's just me being accurate to the original art." When something went well, I learned something that I would be able to apply in the future. If you look closely at the quills and the chest, you'll see that this was the first time I tried edge highlighting to get more of a good lighting effect. On top of that, I just used Baharroth Blue without a base paint, but rather as a base paint that I later darkened with a Tyran Blue shade wash for the creases in the sash. I did the same for the skin near on his abs and arms. (I should have made them blue. Damn.)

I also didn't get so bogged down in being accurate to the inspiration, or became better at knowing what to pick and choose. For example: Sonichu doesn't have a sash, of course. Instead, I decided to go with the color of the banner in Issue #0.

There was a point I briefly considered learning how to actually make a decal, then taking the title to be plastered on the front of the model, but I decided against it. I even considered some yellow streaks to give him a bit of a glow, but if you look at the base you'll see some of the experimental wetblending I tried (and would hypothetically cover later) and it just didn't look good.

Also the feet. Sonichu does have a distinct color for his shoes, but I just shrugged and figured it was more correct to just keep it in line with his hands on the model. I made the hands in the hideous style of the Bad Trailer Sonic, and figured the feet would probably follow the same principle. Besides, the sash had enough blue as it is.

#2: Rule Number Two - Just Don't Get Attached, Too

I said I had fun at all stages painting Sonic'hu, and I meant that. The painting part, that is. Gluing was a disaster.

If you're new to the hobby, understand this: Older models, things from the 90's or earlier, are produced using a plastic resin. It's very light gray (left) while the newer stuff has a dark gray tint and is made with a different kind of plastic.

Now Citadel sells ONE (1) glue, pictured to the left. It's a very good glue for the DARK GRAY plastic. It looks like this. Some people use the one on the right, but the listing on Amazon is apparently sketchy as hell and comes empty because they can scam you out of your money since you can't return or refund liquids. So I never fw it; if I encounter it in a hardware store or hobby shop, I'll pick it up and give it a shot.

This is all to ultimately say that in spite of Citadel selling only ONE KIND OF GLUE, that ONE GLUE cannot hold light gray resin figures together AT ALL.

I don't have pictures, but God was it frustrating. Sonic'hu would CONSTANTLY fall apart while drying. I would be holding his arm in place; the head would fall off. His spines would fall off. He'd flop over on his base. Even after priming him, his arm fell off again, and you can see his face is a mess of when my fingers were just covered and glue and I was just holding him in place frustratedly. I tried like three different glues (not including Tamiya, but Krazy Glue was one) and I don't remember which one worked.

However, whether Tamiya works or not, I actually did have to go back to resin on a different figure recently. I went through my old man's drawer and found this.

It's unreal how good this is. Put this on resin, and the plastic itself comes apart easier than the glue does. It also works okay on the dark gray figures, but I've had the odd part come undone and I went back to the Citadel Glue.

Fair warning though--I'm praising this version of Loctite specifically. There are a few varieties, and I can't say much as far as their quality, but I read online that the ones with an extra long cap tend to dry out and be unopenable later. This Gel Control version doesn't give me any problems like that, though.

#3: Rule Number Three - Wear Your Heart On Your Cheek

My only regret is not going harder with this.

There were some gemstones at the bottom of this model and I literally don't remember what happened to them. I was going to paint them like Chaos Emeralds, originally. Then I saw a paint job of the model that had stones encircling the C'tan Shard like he was making them rise up Dragonball style, and the thought came to mind to get little Chaos Emerald replicas to look as though they were orbiting him. (Unfortunately, Etsy pretty much only had them in a set size, and though Sonic'hu was the largest figure I'd worked on, he was too small to have those orbiting around him.)

I also wanted to learn how to model with Green Stuff using this model; there was a point where I considered making the actual sneakers, but more importantly the Pikachu ears and the one additional spine to bring it up to six total. I didn't not want to do that when I bought it, actually, but after the glue had settled after so much effort I was utterly sick of the prep phase and just went straight to painting.

There's also a little Necron that is at the base of the C'Tan that I also haven't painted, but the reason for that is that I am considering how to do the CWC's "The Classic" shirt on his rib cage. I keep waiting for the inspiration to strike.

So that's Sonic'hu. Honestly, having a shitpost figure was something that helped me be a little less afraid of failure and take chances, make mistakes, and get messy. I would resume tryharding by the next figure, and ultimately paint, in my opinion, my best figure yet.

[bluespiderlully]

Proships' philosophy

Edit: I'll say that I didn't want to start a war in the first sentence of this post, the war for some reason started, sorry guys. If you want to stay away from the battle, you can, just don't be too violent, mustard gas was prohibited in 1925 by the Geneva Convention, it's illegal so don't throw it and be nice, please.

I don't want to start a war guys, I swear, but I've red some posts here and on reddit, or conversations on discord from proshippers, saying thay proshipping is legit just like any other kind of shipping and when someone says them "Hey, I don't like you're shipping these two characters togheter because one of them is a minor and you romanticised the p word or the r word (we'll come to that later, keep that in mind) they completely lose their minds and go berserk; the only thing I'm asking myself is... does this make sense if someone just makes you notice that you're romanticising something that shouldn't be romanticised, and that's objective, in a minor x adult relationship there's often a power dynamic, where one is superior and the other is submitted, of course I'm talking about larger age gaps and not about ships where a character is 17 so they're a minor and the adult character is 18, I think that most of you reading this was in this situation irl, and there's absolutely nothing wrong, but when a character is 14 and another one is 21 well...

The same thing happens in incest, and I am the first person that likes the Jaime x Cersei ship in Game of Thrones, why? Because it's well written, it's realistic. You see this dynamic, Jaime is STRONGLY submitted to Cersei, in fact at one point of the story he leaves her and she freaks out, not because she loves him but because from her pov she owns him, that's different.

Do you want another example? I LOVE the Twin Princes lore in DS3, even in that case there's subordination, Loroian chooses (or does he?) to share his brother Lothric's curse and cripples himself for his sake, defending him from being liked to the First Flame, but he's DEPENDENT from Lothric, you see it in the boss fight and again, this is well written.

But let's come to the r word, toxic relationships are ruining today's literature. Here's your daily reminder that Stockholm syndrome is a medical condition and not romantic at all. I keep seing the bad abusive boy x innocent girl and this is more medieval than actual medieval tales (Lancelot and Guinevre didn't have a toxic relationship).

But again, you can totally write toxic relationships, guess what, it's one of my favourite tropes. I think Hazbin Hotel has a poor writing sometimes but, for example, Valentino and Angel Dust's relationship is very well written, even if what's going on in their relationship is obvious many people are writing fanfictions where they romanticise their relationship... guys... why!? Is everything fine with you?!

I mostly write about KNY and this fandom has a similar situation, I don't get why you all ship RenKaza. This whole thing of romanticising their relationship doesn't make sense in the canon universe, it can make sense in a modern AU, or in an AU where they're both slayers, I think they could get along very well. But people are writing fanfiction where Kyojuro survives and Akaza looks for him, then he finds him, Kyojuro is like "heeey no, you tried to kill me" but they fall in love. Someone who has the intent to kill you doesn't change his mind in a blink of an eye, plus, Akaza was doing his job, he was pretty happy to kill Kyojuro since he wasn't becoming a demon, their whole conversation before starting the fight was "become a demon Kyojuro" "no" "Okay, I'm killing you".

But I've red very good fanfics about Akaza having an obsession about Kyojuro, and these were so good, I can't find the author anymore so *grabs a megaphone and screams in earrape* PLEASE SHOW YOURSELF AND LINK YOUR WORKS SOMEWHERE, IF I WAS A SCULPTOR I'D MAKE YOU A STATUE BUT I'M A SINGER SO THE BEST I CAN DO IS SING YOU A SONG (same for people who will link me this fanfictio). Let's get back to our serious discussion, in these fics Akaza was looking for Kyojuro in his future life too, and Kyojuro's mind was completely fucked up, he was never happy for what happened, he was being threatened and abused, but hey, that's angst, that's not romantic and it's an interesting topic, I can't say the opposite.

So basically ship what you like, there's a way to put your favourite pairing togheter without making it horribly wrong, AUs are a great thing so please use them, and there's nothing wrong in writing about a toxic relationship either, but you have to do it with sensibility, otherwise I can tell you that it's just extremely disrespectful.

[bi-kisses]

I cave. I was a radfem / am still one in theory but everyone is being ridiculously careless with their activism these days. I admit I rooted along for tighter regulations concerning transition particularly for children but it's apparent it doesn't stop there and whenever I tried voicing my concerns to other friends and groups I got belittled and told I was falling into the fearmongering of the TRA. And I also admit I believed that at first but now you can't ignore that the people advocating for the denial of the TRAs demands also cut into women's rights and that of homosexuals and protection rights. It's just too dangerous to play around like that - it doesn't feel like it's worth 'fighting' for if the result is this. Yeah I hurt when I think about the stories of TIMs slithering into our positions and spaces but compared to what is happening and planned to happen law-wise I hurt even more... So I no longer consider myself allied with radfems even though at core I have the same beliefs. I will not act on them. The execution of these are not progress in any way. So begrudgingly - in a two sides only system with no middle ground - I'll cave to their demands for the long run. Also I realise there are more moderate TRAs who acknowledge the two bio sexes (although they they still insist transitioning is possible) who also criticise the TRAs who are one the nonbinary trip (like you) but I honestly think we are all at a point where we can't refuse taking sides when the issue (to vote on) is black and white. Maybe that's just the election fear coming up. So my ask is to you as a kind of mediator/ person between the two sides: what's your take on this? Justified fear to have or baseless concerns? Is taking sides necessary?

Genuinely a really interesting thing to talk about!

I think that, the problem with "picking a side" in this case, is that beliefs aren't the same as actions. So when you hold opinions, they can be very nuanced and have layers regarding the validity of this or that identity, but when it comes to actually calling for societal change, that nuance is.... Flatter.

As a result, yeah, I think we *are* sort of forced to choose one extreme or the other, despite our beliefs falling somewhere in the middle, because there isn't any opportunity right now to push for those moderate views, legally speaking. The options are bodily autonomy for all, including transition, or restricting the rights of women and children.

I agree with a lot of tenants that radical feminists stand for, such as abortion rights, normalization of body hair, fighting porn culture/the sex industry, and being critical of the beauty industry (makeup, cosmetic surgeries, etc). But that doesn't mean I align myself with radical feminists, because ideologies don't own ideas outright, and I disagree with so many other core beliefs.

Radical feminists these days have prioritized their hatred for trans people, predominantly trans women, over the rights and autonomy of women in general. You're absolutely right and it's not an easy thing to admit, if you've been ascribed to a label and/or community for any length of time, that they're on the wrong side of things.

Because, circling back, it has become a matter of those two extreme sides, and radical feminism has chosen to fight for restricting everyone's rights out of hatred for <1% of the population.

To answer your questions directly, I do think there's justified concern. The UK is a great example of how poorly this is turning out. And if you plan on actually engaging in activism outside of the internet, I do think you have to choose a side, or at least a cause, to stake your effort into... Even if you aren't 100% on board with the cause as a whole.

I'll use my friend as an example. She's a trans woman living stealth and has been doing a lot of activist work advocating for Palestine. The committee she's a part of had a controversy because another member was accused of transphobia. This controversy was drawing away time and resources from their main cause, being Palestine. My friend honestly didn't give a shit if someone on the board had transphobic beliefs because that wasn't the point of what they were doing, so she tried to redirect that attention back to their work rather than internal conflict. She had to pick a side there, as a trans person, and she chose the pressing matter over the personal one.

I think it's something we can learn from and relate to.

I want to conclude by thanking you because your ask was really interesting as a fresh perspective. If you'd like to talk more, my DMs and ask box are open.

[phoenixdnasty]

The Problem with Season Five

this is already going to have a lot of you in the replies yelling at me. obviously, massive SPOILERS for s5 of she ra and the princesses of power if you haven't already seen it.

okay, so She Ra is definitely a kids' show, but it has a lot of themes aimed towards an older audience: abuse, war, found family, destiny and knowing who you are. I loved She Ra because it made me feel empowered, made me feel seen. after this last season, however, I don't feel the same. I will, however, talk about what it did well.

What She-Ra s5 did RIGHT

I very much enjoyed seeing the character development for most characters come to the forefront here. For example, SW returned to her original motivations. When she lived in Mystacor with the other sorcerers, her thirst for power was borne of a desire to fight the Horde. When she was rejected, then she chose to do what she did. We see a return to that in s5, where she takes a stand against Prime by enlisting Castaspella to stop her if she tries to take any power for herself. She ends up just wanting to help, to do what she can, which was excellent. Glimmer, Bow and a bunch of other characters are given some love here as well. I especially enjoyed seeing Bow and Mermista take on leadership positions in the absence of Adora; it was an excellent look into another facet of their personalities.

Character interactions in non-serious moments were, for the most part, good. Swift Wind and Scorpia being bros was not something I knew I needed but something I want more of. Netossa basically being Batman and knowing the weaknesses of everyone around her was great and an iconic scene. Bow thinking Catra was super adorable was also an excellent moment in the season and I could watch 9 more seasons worth of that. Something that surprised me was Entrapta's "not good with people"-ness being talked about and addressed by the other characters and explained by her; I wasn't sure if that was ever gonna be talked about in the show.

Side note: thank you Crew-Ra for giving Scorpia her own musical number, it was great.

Prime was also a fascinating enemy. He's this sort of religious figure, this world destroyer who's been around for seemingly centuries, maybe much longer. He's cold, calm and calculated. I've seen it pointed out that he's everything Hordak is not. He's manipulative, knows body language and facial expressions, and has a perfect grasp on how to get exactly what we wants. My favorite aspect of this season was the hive mind control. This was a very interesting plotline to me, and I thoroughly enjoyed HiveMind!Catra as well as Wrong Hordak. I loved the idea of pitting allies against each other and the angst and emotional weight that carried.

Going to use that point to segue into one of this season's strengths: Netossa and Spinnerella. Wow! We get a chance to see what a healthy queer/wlw relationship looks like, and two background characters get major upgrades in relevance. Two diversity points for one being a big girl and for the couple being interracial (in our world anyway), but diversity is the norm is SPOP and we might have to stan forever. It was extremely heartwarming and resulted in one of my favorite scenes to ever show up in animated media (one which I'll be stealing to add to my vows if I ever get married):

It was beautiful and I will absolutely never shut up about it.

There were some beautiful moments this season!! Absolutely gorgeous. A highlight for me cinematically was episode 5, which will probably bother some people when I say what I will below. I will be honest, the new transformation sequence and the scene of Adora holding Catra as She-Ra was powerful and had my heart pounding with excitement. It was awesome.

On the other hand...

What She-Ra s5 did WRONG

I'm going to break my issues with the final season down one by one, starting with the narrative of abuse.

From the very beginning, abuse is the most prevalent theme in the show. Prime (HP) abuses Hordak, Hordak abuses SW, SW abuses both Adora and Catra, and Catra abuses Adora. I liked the Crew-Ra tackling this issue. Abused people abuse people, right?

Why was everyone redeemed in s5? (Well, except for Prime, he was blasted away by She-Ra.) Hordak was given a blank slate to start over, even though he was the reason Etheria was war torn for at least a few decades; SW was given a hero's sacrifice, where at the end of her life she finally decides to do some good; and Catra is immediately forgiven for doing one good thing and all trust in placed in her simultaneously.

Hordak and H. Prime as abusers are pretty cut and dry; at no point are they ever remorseful for their actions, except for Hordak in the case of being abusive to Entrapta. SW is much more of an interesting character to analyze, because her motivations are geared directly towards herself. This seems to change in the final season, when she returns to her original motivations from back when she was in Mystacor. Defending her home. In her pursuit of the power needed to defend Etheria from the Horde, she fell into darkness. She began to abuse Adora and Catra.

One could argue that the hero's sacrifice she was given for redemption was unneeded. SW was an individual addicted to power. She was manipulative, using fake affection as a means to control. She didn't deserve a redemption. The only evidence we have of this supposed change of heart is a line to Castaspella: "...and stop me if I try to take the power for myself." Okay... so, SW, um... what changed your mind? Was it Micah? Because at no point has he forgiven you. In fact, there should've been much more hostility between the two of you (which is a point I'll address in a moment). In all honesty, the relationship between SW and Micah reminds me of what should've happened between Catra and Glimmer, or Catra and Scorpia.

And Catra... My problem with her story is that she was kinda just... forgiven? instantly. no repercussions, no long talks about feelings, no... consequences. Catra got the girl and that was it. A small list of things she did over 4 seasons, in no certain order:

Scratched what was implied were scarring marks down Adora's back

Was the cause of Angella's "death" #angelladeservedbetter

Kidnapped both Glimmer and Bow

Opened a world-ending portal all to ensure Adora failed

Also pushed Adora into what looked like an abyss

Verbally abused Scorpia into leaving

Wanted to pit Corrupted!She-Ra against her friends (dehumanization)

Got Entrapta sent to Beast Island, a deadly place no one ever returns from

And this is just the stuff off the top of my head. We all knew Catra was going to get a redemption, but this one was completely undeserved. She apologized to Adora and Entrapta. Two very short apologies for what canonly was at minimum, months of abuse, manipulation, intent to kill (which is literally mentioned by Adora) and general disregard for anyone or anything but revenge for something that didn't even deserve it. The entire cast should've been outraged. Glimmer in particular had a very big reason not to ever forgive Catra ("I'm not losing another parent!"), but it was all glossed over.

The biggest issue with season 5 was the abuse plotline completely dropped. You can't spend 4 seasons explaining how the cycle of abuse affects you and everyone around you... and shelve it. And we know the reason why it was shelved.

Let me first preface this with the fact that I am super happy we got representation. As a queer nblw who grew up feeling alone, it's so good to see things changing in media. An onscreen wlw kiss on a kids' show is groundbreaking and I'm very happy that She-Ra broke this barrier.

But all representation is not good representation. Catra and Adora is not a good representation of a healthy relationship.

Catra is shown throughout the series to be very unstable. This is even prevalent in season 5, when Adora "chooses SW" over Catra, she runs away. This breaks Adora's heart. The last thing that Catra needs is a relationship when she hasn't even confronted the issues that she has. There's no healing done in season 5, no therapy as the fandom loved to meme about, no long talks about forgiveness and the hurt caused. There's no callback to any of the pain and anguish that Catra put Adora through. Catra may love Adora, but if there is no healing done for the both of them, their relationship will fail. They will fall into the same cycle again. Adora will do something Catra doesn't like, Catra will do what she's done for all of the show, and it will repeat until something breaks.

I'm going to talk about the implications of the ending we have now, and feel free to argue with me.

She-Ra is a kids' show. Abuse is one of the main themes. Catra is shown to be an abuser. Here's what we are teaching younger audiences:

a. if you love someone enough, maybe they'll change

b. everyone deserves a second chance

c. your abuser will change as long as you're loyal and never stop trying to love them

d. things someone does to hurt you mean nothing in the wake of forgiveness

e. if someone who hurt you changes suddenly and wants to be back in your life, you should let them back in

Character interactions for the things that mattered (plot threads from previous seasons, general personality clashes, etc) were absent this season, in the moments where they mattered the most. (The best three in my opinion were Scorpia and Perfuma, the BFS inviting Catra in, and Mermista and Entrapta.) Glimmer and Adora should've had their time to talk. Scorpia should've gotten to say her piece to Catra. SW and Micah should've interacted more. Micah and Glimmer should've gotten more than an introduction!

I'm not going to get into how the entire final season was wrapped around making Catra and Adora get together (a fundamental writing no-no; it never ends up working), or how it was bad writing. I just want everyone to think critically for one moment. There are so many other glaring issues in what was, overall, a stellar show. If there was another season, or some mini episodes where the characters talk out their problems and past transgressions against each other, then I could excuse She-Ra. But I doubt we're going to get any of that. So I won't.

[fezwearingjellybananas]

Rules: List the first lines of your last 20 stories (if you have less than 20, just list them all!). See if there are any patterns. Choose your favourite opening line.

Tagged by @kitkatt0430 thank you!

1. Late Night Rendezvous: Barry pulled his hat low to cover his face.

2. Fixed Point: "When are we?" Jax asked.

3. Frosty Mornings: The chill in the air was the first thing Iris noticed.

4. Tess and Harry: Harry wasn't Harrison.

5. Team Flash: “This certainly seems like quite the predicament,” Professor Martin Stein said.

6. Trouble with Time Travel: Eddie Thawne had a ring.

7. Children of the Revolution: Leia’s blue lightsaber clashed against Vader’s red, sparks flying.

8. Sweet Defiance: Falling in love with a renegade was a bad idea.

9. The Lawyer and the Superhero: Barry froze in the doorway.

10. The Scientist and the Fraud: "I don't know why this is so hard," Tess said.

11. The Annual West-Allen Pumpkin Carving Competition: The one thing speedsters did slowly was age, the Speed Force desperate to cling onto them for as long as it could.

12. Sleepy Cuddles: Dawn didn’t say anything when she clambered up into Barry’s lap, just curled up and leaned in.

13. Hallway Conversations: "Come with me," Barry said.

14. Relaxation: There was a nice smell when David opened the door.

15. Jacket: Barry was shivering.

16. Late Night Cooking: "Zari?"

17. Home: Hal ran a hand absently through Iris' hair.

18. Missed Bus: The bus had left early.

19. First Spark: "It's okay, baby," Barry said.

20. Inappropriate Workplace Conversations: Barry landed in Hal's arms and Hal smiled.

These are predominantly shorter fics, most with just one or two scenes, so I think I try and start what's happening as soon as possible? A few of these are all parts of the same AU so following on from each other rather than stand alone fics, and 11 through 20 are fills for Flufftober so don't all exactly have plots (Late Night Cooking is written to fit another AU, Flash & Hawkgirl, and it's intended more as establishing the relationship Zari and Rip have in that AU because they aren't main characters but I do have quite a few ideas for them), but I think when I write something short I would rather get right into whatever the scene is and establish a little more about it later if that makes sense? Children of the Revolution, for example, is an AU Snippet, I didn't manage to write the whole AU so instead I launched straight into Leia and Luke fighting Vader at the end of Empire Strikes Back and tried to use bits of dialogue later to establish a little more about the setting. Home is a drabble, it only has 100 words and that was a challenge I set myself from the start so I was very conservative with how many I used so an exposition sentence to start would not have worked. Even the one long fic on this list, Sweet Defiance, was at its inception intended to be a short fic, I just got into space pirates plots (more people should write space pirates, it is very fun) and it turned into 25k but it kept its original opening as intended for a short fic, and it does start right in the middle of one plot, but that's not really the focus of the fic, it is important, but it's more what throws them together and the actual plot is Eddie, Iris, and Barry working out where they stand with each other and deciding to stay together.

Favourite openings, I do like the first line of The Annual West-Allen Pumpkin Carving Competition, but I think it's Sweet Defiance (especially if I can inculde the whole first paragraph), that's why it never changed even after becoming a long fic.

Tagging @shrinkthisviolet and @squireofgeekdom if you would like?

[judgement-free-sideblog]

Never underestimate a black suit

Bill Hader x Reader

I'm not even going to pretend I regret this one. It all started in 2009 when I became obsessed with SNL, then he just kept popping up, here an there and the crush just grow, and since thanks to It chapter 2 he is finally getting the recognition he deserves I got this idea last night and I got to write it before it escapes my mind.

One shot: Imagine you are a PA in Barry and you have the biggest crush on Bill Hader but it seems like he hates you because he is dead serious all the time he is around you.

Warnings: Swearing, Age gap (I know he is just over forty but god I love him).

You were pacing on the set, the Steve Allen Theater, hoping for someone, anyone, to give you an order so you could pretend you were so good at your job as PA so they won't fired you. But the damage was done, all thanks to your verbal incontinence and now the most amazing job in the world was about to be over.

You had started working on Barry about a year ago, and you have loved every minute of it, the cast was so sweet and down to earth, and make your job so much easier, D'arcy Carden for example was always thankful with you for the simplest things like bringing her coffee and Sarah Golberg even had invited you to lunch after you helped her with a female problem one time. They were so talented and nice that you could not believe it when the production called you back for the third season to keep working there.

But then it was him, the titular character, the fucking genius whose hard work and imagination have created this magnificent show, Bill Hader. Yes you were 28 and he 42, but still you couldn't explain it, there was something about the way he spoke and the way he walked that made you weak on your knees every time, and his laugh, you were sure something had been fixed in your mind after the first time you heard him laugh.

And then it was that first week of shooting from last year, the retro outfit with the suspenders, you couldn't get your eyes off him and you almost made one of the sound guys trip with Henry Winkler. And then the table scene, you were in the back making sure the extras were in their right place and avoiding look at him because he was so perfect on that scene that you certainly will froze just by looking at him.

This little crush was obvious for absolutely everyone, except obviously for Bill, you were sure that Anthony Carrigan even deliberately asked you for anything when he was talking to Bill to see you all clumsy and awkward, not to be a dick, just to push you to talk to him, but you were certain he didn't liked you, with most of the other members of the cast and crew he was always laughing, but in the limited interactions you had he was serious, asked you for a coffee now and then or to make a phone call but just that, and you were beginning to think your absurd infatuation was making him uncomfortable, so you tone it down, made a composed face and limited to do your job.

But now you had blow it. That morning they were filming the behind the episode, for the new season, at some point Barry had one of those daydreams and he imagine himself married to Sally, so there he was all perfect in a black suit sitting in his chair next to Alec Berg talking about the challenges of the new season and how thankful they were to come back.

"So the cast is amazing, the first two episodes of the season are incredible and you have managed to keep the same novelty feeling on the series, why do you think that is?" The guy interviewing them asked.

"Well I think it's mainly thanks to the cast" Alec started "This guys are just amazing, this season we are actually giving Sally a bigger arc and that is very interesting"

"And the crew too" Bill said then "I mean they make us all look good, even when some scenes are a total disaster, the set designers, the wardrobe and all that" they made a pause and you were there to put water bottles in the table between them.

"Bill I have known that you used to be a PA, you think that gives you a better understanding on how hard it is for and aspiring actor as Barry, and does it translate on the writing?" He asked and against your better judgment you stay there to listen.

"Totally, but on a more personal level I try to no be diva with my PAs, recognize they do a hard work and know them all by name, that sort of things"

And then your verbal incontinence kick in, and there, just a few feet away, your mouth was quicker than your brain and still looking at him you spoke, not that loud to be heard by the three of them but enough for him to look straight at you.

"That's bullshit" you instinctively took your hands to your mouth and turn around before you could saw him react and went away pretending you were taking coffee orders. And here you were just waiting for the "we are gonna have to let you go" speech when one of the other PAs called you.

"Hey Y/N Hader says you have to go to his dressing room ASAP" Your friend Danny said and you felt like something heavy fall down inside your stomach.

"Can someone else go?" You answered trying to find an excuse "I have to walk Kirby's dog" you lied.

"No, he said you specifically, something about a mail he asked you to sent?" You gave him a thumbs up and start walking to his dressing room, already feeling you were fired.

"Did you need anything Mr. Hader" You tried to sound professional, and not dead ass scared.

"Oh sure, Y/N, please come in" Great! He did know your name, so apart from impertinent you were an asswhole. And he was still in that stupid black suit that made him look so gorgeous, not like the tshirts and hoodies didn't. "Do you by any chance printed those documents I asked you to send last week? I seem to have deleted them and Alec is going to freak out" He said as nice and kind as always and the weight in your stomach start lightening.

"Yeah sure, I ... well unless someone says is confidential I make copies of everything, an old habit" You said looking for a flash drive in your purse. Since all the crew sing a NDA at the beginning of the production there was nothing wrong with that, unless of course you put it on Twitter if you wanted to go to jail.

"This is not your first work on a set right?" He asked while you started looking for the documents in his laptop.

"Oh no sir. I worked in Dead to me two years ago, but since they are in a break I try my luck here last year, and HBO has better catering" You said concentrated in your work.

"Oh so you met Christina?" He asked genuinely interested, "how old were you then?"

"26, a bit late to start in this business I know, but well I like it more" You answered with a smile and then pointed to the laptop "There they are".

"Thanks so much, truly a life saver" He said and let go a sigh "And you are never too old or too young to start, as long as you enjoy it, and tolerate your bosses... bullshit was it?" He said raising an eyebrow accusatory. You immediately turn white and then red and multiple apologizes started bubbling in your mouth.

"I'm so sorry sir, I really am, I sometimes speak my mind and say all this stupid stuff, I'm sorry" You finally managed to say. He started laughing, you didn't let go the painful irony of the situation, it was the first time you made him laugh, and probably will be the last.

"I'm sorry" He said finally " I couldn't help it, relax. I'm not mad. It was quite funny what you said, I sound like such a duchebag I know everyone by name" He said making an acute voice and you start calming down "But if anything I'm sorry I made you, or any of the crew, feel like you don't matter. All of you are actually great" He said and smiled again to you. "Also lose the Mr Hader, that's bullshit, you can call me Bill".

"Oh no, I couldn't, I'm already so embarrassed by why I did" you started and he looked at you making exaggerated puppy eyes mouthing please, and it was lucky you were so nervous otherwise you would have exploded with laughter "Ok Bill"

"Ok then you are 28, and recently started as a PA, you want to be an actress?" He said, leaning back on his desk.

"Absolutely not, I wanted to be a writer, I was a writer actually in a newspaper, but it didn't feel right and then I realized I wanted to write stories, scripts, and one of my friends was an extra in Stranger things, then she said Netflix needs PAs and well there I went" You said, it was easy talk to him. "Also I don't have the looks for it and hate to se myself in pictures"

"I don't have the looks for it, and here I am" He said opening his arms "But honestly you keep writing and trying, if it's what you want, I mean I get here"

"Well yeah but have seen yourself in that suit?" Your mouth betrayed you again and you look at your feet to hide your face. "Amm I think I have a dog to walk, bye" You said before he could said anything and run away.

The next weeks were difficult, you avoid being alone with Bill but you kept doing your job as good as always, and every once in a while you will notice him looking at you, thinking on how pathetic you must look to him. Until the last day of shooting, they wrapped up the season and it was amazing. The only thing left was to go for a drink at Henry's place and start looking for a new job, thankfully you had finally written a promising draft and your hopes were high.

Maybe that's why you actually choose to drink at the party, and dance with your friends and some members of the cast, and you were a little more talkative than usual, until Anthony who was talking to you about something you were not actually listening leave you alone next to bill.

"So what's next??" He asked in the middle of the loud music, and you didn't quite got it because he signaled the garden and you followed him. "Finally I couldn't hear my thoughts" He said once you were outside.

"It's really loud, but you all deserve it" You said and suddenly realized you were alone. "What where you asking?" You tried to sound casual.

"Oh if you could get me a coffee" he joked and then quickly add "No I was wondering what's next for you after this is over?"

"I actually waiting good news from Amazon, maybe with any luck I'll get a chance with one of my scripts" You said proudly.

"That's amazing" He said with bright happy eyes "I'm so glad for you, so we won't be seeing you in season four?"

"With any luck no" You answered "You'll have to find another impertinent PA to call out your bullshit" You add laughing.

"Oh I'm pretty sure we will find someone, or I can always call you and ask you to do it for free" He said and you could notice how close he was "You know as a concerned friend"

"Sure, I can do that, my contract finalized yesterday day so I guess starting today I'm just your rude friend that says come on man don't be a duchebag" You said letting go a small laugh but he was looking at you completely serious.

"In that case..." He started and took your face between his hands, he was so tall and you felt so tiny next to him but also it was so nice and comfortable being so close, he lean in to kiss you and stop just close enough to your mouth so you will feel his breath, as if he asked for your permission to continue, and instead of saying something that could ruin the moment you close the distance and kiss him.

His lips felt soft and tender over your lips, and he slowly started deepening the kiss pressing you against him from your waist, and you hold on to the front of his jacket trying to keep him closer to you, hoping for this moment to never end, until the absurd necessity of oxygen force you to split.

"I ... I didn't think it would be appropriate to do that when we were working together" He started, smiling like a child. "I'm sorry if I made you feel like I was avoiding you, Anthony messing up with me by having you around all the time didn't help either"

"Don't worry it's okay, and yeah it would have been super inappropriate but thank god I no longer have a job" you said still trying to make sense of the situation.

"Would you... I mean I love Henry but there's only alcohol in here, do you want to go grab some dinner?" He said pointing the exit.

"I would love that" you answered, overwhelmed by joy and you followed him to the door, happy with all the possibilities the future hold.

[thesilenceanswers]

WHAT I THINK ABOUT:

TV SERIES – SKAM remakes (WtFock)

I think I could define myself as a big Skam fan which is quite dumb as a definition because it’s impossible not to be a big Skam fan once you start watching it.

So, better to say, I’m a normal Skam fan (which means BIG Skam fan) who is truly completely and utterly in love with season 3.

Again, no surprise, I guess.

However, I recently watched WtFock season 3 (unfortunately I didn’t watch it on real-time) and at the beginning the thing that got me so emotional was the concept that another parallel universe was forming.

But afterwards I fell in love with the two characters, even more than in the original one, if possible.

Since the talk about multiverse theory has a special spot in my heart, I decided to analyse that specific clip in WtFock.

WOENSDAG 16:36

1. The settings: colours and music

In my view, music and colours have the power to enlighten the whole mood and to convey a wholeness to a clip. I personally loved the soft colours chosen for this moment: the beige tone and the brownish aesthetic of the setting gave me somehow a sense of warmth and calm. It’s so relaxing and pleasing for both the eyes and the soul.

However, not only the colour palette is perfectly made, but also the choice of music is brilliant.

Every time the intro of ocean eyes by Billie Eilish begins, my world just breaks in two: this song was composed for this moment, you can’t change my mind.

It’s just so so accurate: Sander and Robbe really can't stop staring at each other’s eyes.

2. Lovebird

The beginning of the clip is both intense and light-hearted.

I know it may seem a dichotomy but it's just like that: right in the middle of the cuddles and the kisses the two of them can be so playful with each other (Robbe throwing pillows at Sander, or Sander playing around with the chips)

These two are truly lovebirds and all of these small gestures actually show how comfortable they are with the presence of the other: it's such a tender and soft scene that it warms my heart every time I watch it.

However, the apotheosis of this first part of the clip is peaked when Sander shows Robbe his sketch for the mural. I won’t lie, my heart sinked the first time I witnessed this magic moment (actually it does every time I re-watch it, but that's another story): just imagine how Robbe must have feeling sad and alone for such a long time; but then, out of nowhere, the man of his life just shows him how much he already means to him. Sander is so in love with Robbe that he is already his muse.

But that's not enough: our camera boy wants to portray the man of his dreams also with his camera.

And, again, I find it amazing how the two of them fit so well together: how Robbe giggles trying not to get

photographed and how Sander laughs saying "Allè posé".

But that’s not only by the gesture that we can feel they are so comfortable at the presence of the other, it’s also by how they interact.

I personally love how Robbe feels so at ease that he does not hesitate a moment before saying “Leonardo Di Caprio” when Sander asks him about his favourite actor.

He just simply says what he actually thinks and this really shows how much he already feels connected with Sander.

I know that "favourite actor" is a minor subject, but still I think that Robbe would have not be so relaxed in telling the Brores that he actually loved Romeo and Juliet; and that is because he is trying to hide his real self from his best friends. But that's not the case with Sander: Robbe feels free to be fully himself with him.

3. Sander’s shield and Robbe’s multiverse

However, in my opinion, the most outstanding moment of this clip is the conversation they have about life.

The first important aspect of this turning point event is Sander's behaviour.

At first, we are able to see only the shield he has put around himself for avoiding pain and suffering.

This defence mechanism (this shield) is visible when he says: '' Actually life is sometimes a bit like a movie, you have control over your own life. Choosing what your life is and what it will become".

This statement it's just so Sander-like: it shows the god-like character and the flawless golden boy he tries so hard to be.

But Sander's shield crashes down as soon as Robbe goes on by giving one of my favorite speeches of the show: " The theory (of multiverse) is based on the fact that time is also just a dimension and that besides this universe, there exists several other universes. When you make a decision, the universe splits itself. You can exist in every universe, but then always a little bit different. There could be Sander and Robbe lying in the same exact position as we are right now but, for example, there could be curtains with different colour".

I really find this speech a piece of art, pure poetry and pure genius: it made me shiver in the original one but this one got me mesmerized.

I realized why it is so important for me: I can relate to this view.

However, despite of the profound impact that these words had on me, what I love the most is Sander's reactions throughout the speech.

He is constantly but tenderly teasing Robbe by saying: "Like Spider-Man?" "Like in the flash?" and then the iconic "Yellow curtains" (I see the reference here).

I literally love these little remarks because I find them so genuine: Sander is actually listening to Robbe and he wants to interact with him for letting him know he does care about what he says.

However, I find Sander being so generous in giving those light-hearted comments: even though he really feels deeply what Robbe has told him, he is still trying to cheer Robbe up and to lighten the mood.

4. They never stop

(aka the most outstanding moment of the clip)

It’s just a moment but it changes everything.

Robbe looks directly in Sander's eyes and asks him if he has ever thought like that.

For me the whole world did stop for a moment when I first saw it.

In Robbe's stare I can feel his desire to understand Sander's real thoughts: he does care about him and that's why he wants to get to see Sander for who he truly is.

It's at Robbe's pure and tender care, that is the point when Sander's shield falls.

He stares at the ceiling thinking about what to say.

The music stops and the burden weighing on his shoulders is finally visible as he says 'I have".

With this small statement we get to see the real Sander: the fragile, insecure, lost boy who struggles with his life and who isn't so invincible like he appears to be.

Suddenly he finds himself helpless and falling in a black hole of dark feelings as he let himself go by saying: "Then I feel so lonely. Just don't you sometimes think: why is that I think what I'm thinking. Then you go back to your memories, step by step, and then how you went from one thought to the other. Then you think: why is like this? What if at that one thought I had thought something else, then I wasn't thinking what I am thinking right now. That keeps continuing, it goes on and on and it doesn't stop."

I shiver every time I hear this speech. It is so intense, so powerful and yet so dark.

The first time I heard it, I was affected by it at the point that I couldn't remember where my thoughts ended and where Sander's ones begin.

That was because I completely relate to those thoughts, and hearing them from him got me like his character even more because I could see how human he was.

He is just as complex as we are.

He is passionate, brave and full of life, yet he feels powerless towards the fact that he doesn’t feel the author of his own thoughts and consequently his own life.

[mercurialsmile]

Any tips on writing nonbinary characters? Like, any 'do's and 'don't's? I really wanna get it right, so I thought I'd ask someone who actually identifies as nonbinary :)

Any tips on writing nonbinary/trans characters?

I got two asks for this (maybe from the same person?) and it’s taken me some time to write an answer since this is such a broad... question. 

Thing is, nonbinary is both a gender in and of itself but also kinda an umbrella term? Since you also have people who are agender, bigender, genderfluid, etc. who would also technically fall under the umbrella, but don’t call themselves nonbinary since that’s not the label they want, and since the latter labels are a lot more... specific. 

Non-binary simply means that someone identifies as a gender outside the binary of man and woman and that’s it. 

There’s also the fact that I’m pretty sure I have some opinions other nonbinary people wouldn’t agree with (for example, I dislike neopronouns. Xir/Xe and Zie/Zir are the only ones that’s pronounceable to me. And I straight up dislike nounself pronouns and actively avoid people who only use nounself pronouns since to me, they are. Too hard and complicated to use. I remember reading a really good post on why nounself pronouns are linguistically incorrect in English and how to properly format them to be correct, but I dunno where that post is now) which is also why I have been hesitant about this.

Also it’s a complex... hmm thing. So yeah.

I think the first thing to ALWAYS remember when writing a minority character is that their status as a minority is not their only trait. Don’t use cliches. Don’t make them one-dimensional and make an enby’s entire personality revolving around the fact they’re enby. It’s othering, at least to me, and just plain bad writing. 

Another thing is, even tho I wish there were more books out there about being enby (are there any really out there at all?) for the most part I think cis authors should be careful and kinda tread around writing about an enby’s life and being enby. Unless you have done a shit ton of research, know exactly what you’re doing, and have talked to multiple different enbys (and not just over text either), I would merely have the character. Be there.

1) it’s a lot easier who wants to do all that research?? 

2) still counts as rep (as long as it’s positive)

So how do you write (possibly?) positive rep for a enby character? Let’s go back to pronouns. The most versatile and acceptable pronouns for enby people is they/them tbh. It’s completely gender-neutral. There are enby people who use gendered pronouns as well (She/her, he/him, maybe they use all three!) but writing-wise, it would be easiest to keep to one set of pronouns to make the writing easier to read. I dunno about anyone else, but I for sure would get tripped up and confused if a character’s pronouns change throughout a book. (Maybe it can be written well idk but I don’t think I’d like it personally sorry) so for the most part? I suggest just sticking with they/them. It’s the easiest to write. 

Also, I suggest to never call your enby characters “it”. Yes, some irl enbys like “it” as a pronoun, but to most it’s dehumanizing, so it’s best to avoid it I think. 

Interestingly enough, even tho they/them is the easiest to write with, it can also be a little tricky at times! Sometimes you’ll have to format sentences differently so readers can understand the difference between the singular and plural forms of they/them. Personally, it’s a fun writing exercise to me! So if anything, writing about an enby character can actually help stretch some different writing muscles so to speak. 

And speaking of pronouns, never ever have the narration misgender the character. Never. Hell, usually, I don’t even have characters or even the VILLAINS of my books misgender characters. And my reasoning behind this is: I dislike using transphobia/enbyphobia as a tool to show a villain is evil--their actions alone in the novel should be enough. And two: if even the evilest of villains aren’t transphobic... that says a lot to me. It speaks VOLUMES and is a lot more powerful of an (unsaid) statement then having your villains be transphobes. (but that’s just my opinion ofc!!) 

Now, to me, if you’re just writing about a enby side character, I would just have them. Be there. Not misgendered, everyone regarding them using the proper pronouns, and avoiding gendered language (which can be hard as it is hardwired into us without us even knowing, for instance!) so make sure you edit accordingly. 

Also, and I think this should be OBVIOUS by now, but PLEASE do not write a “forced coming out” scene. Like, where the cis character walks in on an enby character changing clothes or whatever. Like. That is. So over with and done. Ik that terrible trope fits trans men/women characters better, but I think it’s still important to say here, esp if you’re writing an enby character who tries to pass as the opposite of their birth gender or binds/stuffs/packs/etc at all. It’s uncomfortable, possibly triggering, and honestly? Super cliche. It’s bad writing, my friend. 

And whether or not you want to make the direct statement that they are an enby is kinda up to you? There’s arguments for and against it. If you can fit it into the story safely without making anything clunky, go for it! You can either have the character themselves tell someone how they identify, or maybe they’re being introduced and they ask the person they are introducing themselves to to use “they/them” since they are an enby. I’m sure there are other, more creative ways to do this, but yeah. This specific topic is super situational so I would have a sensitivity reader (or two!) to read over what you write to make sure it’s okay. 

Okay the last thing I’m gonna talk about is character description. Ignoring the fact I personally am terrible at it, there’s a kinda huge divide here. 

For one, a lot of authors and I think enby people in general don’t want others to know their birth gender, which is understandable. And with writing, there isn’t any visual clues besides what you write down. The world is your oyster, you can have your character look like anything, the reader won’t know the birth gender unless you use gendered language. 

The tricky thing is this, tho: the stereotypical enby person/character is someone who is skinny white and vaguely masculine. I, personally, despise this stereotype with my whole being. Imo, enby people can dress and look however they want. Clothes are just fabrics we put onto our flesh bodies. If girls can enjoy pants and boys can like dresses and skirts, then enbys can dress however they want to as well. That’s a freedom I think everyone should have. Clothes don’t dictate gender. Enby people also can’t control what they look like. Some people.. just won’t ever be able to pass as androgynous (unless they Really Work at it, like me!!) and it’s unfair to them I think as well. 

That being said, writing an enby with feminine clothing, for example, will probably have your reader think of them as DFAB, unfortunately, unless you are really careful.

Other things that can make your reader think of an enby’s birth gender: describing them having to wear a bra or having a period, describing if they have to shave their face or not or how much facial hair they grow, describing their genitalia AT ALL, describing them with certain face/body shapes, describing their hair length (possibly), if they wear a binder or stuff a bra or pack, describing if they wear makeup and the list can go on. 

Some people would think you should avoid this completely, which is why vaguely masculine is what people go for. it’s the typical androgynous look (which isn’t bad pe se and I don’t wanna insult anyone who looks like that!) but imo what would be more normalizing and important is to have enby characters look how they want, choose if they wanna wear a binder or not, if they wear makeup, and etc. 

Some people might thing the above is completely fine and that it’s important to show anyone can be enby and you’re still valid as an enby even if you might not “pass” for instance or don’t try your best to conceal certain secondary sex characteristics. Others might think you should make your enby characters as androgynous as possible, even in the stereotypical way. 

Which view is right? Dammed if I know, and I don’t think one is or not. But it is something to think about. I think the stereotypical response to a cis author would be to go with the safest option and allow enby authors write about enby characters breaking gender roles, but honestly, it is your character. Whether you make your enby character vaguely masculine to avoid those pitfalls or go balls to the walls and do whatever you want because enbys can dress and look how they want fuck you all is up to you. Do what you think your character would do and design them to match their personality. I don’t think people should be boxed into what sort of characters they are allowed to make. 

And don’t be afraid to make mistakes. It’s okay if you fuck something up by accident or are accidentally insensitive. And honestly? Groups of people aren’t a hivemind. No matter how good your representation is, there will be someone who disagrees with you and thinks you didn’t “write it correctly”

all I can say is: learn as much as you can, always strive to keep learning and listening, and do the best you can. You can’t succeed if you don’t try and you can’t learn without making a few mistakes along the way. 

(And as for trans characters... I myself am not a trans man/woman so idk how to best say what not to do, but I think it follows the same as above for the most part? I’d ask the opinion of a trans man or woman first rather than an enby like me, as even I have fucked up writing about my trans woman character in the past. I’ve learned a lot since then, but I think I am still learning and would rather not educate someone on a topic such as that. Also this post is already long and I am Tired of writing about this topic lol) 

I rambled a lot as usual and I am so so sorry. It’s late and this was SUCH a broad question I didn’t?? Really know how to answer so YEAH SORRY if this is no help at all!! I tried my best!!

[head-and-heart]

Do you agree with what many showrunners fear re: the Moonlighting curse -- that once a pair is together, it's boring? Even Eliza said it would be boring to have Bellarke bc 'they'd be happy and then what'? As shippers we want them happy, but as storytellers, is it boring especially in this genre of tv? This show is a tragedy/angst-fest, so I wonder if making a happy couple of your leads is considered stale from a writer's POV - like they don't find it exciting to write? I'm curious to understand

Hmmm, I agree to a certain extent. Some couples are kind of boring to watch after they get together. But I don’t blame that on any sort of curse - to do so is a writer’s cop-out. It more-so lies in an issue with the way the writer’s are choosing to develop their romantic relationships in the long-term versus pursuing actual canon relationships themselves.

We have to ask ourselves these questions:

a) Is the relationship dependent on the will-they-won’t-they trope in order to function?

For this one, I think of Ross and Rachel from Friends as being a prime example. For ten seasons, the question of whether or not they would get together in the end was one of the largest focuses on the show. In fact, I’d say a significant portion of Ross’s storyline as a character (and Rachel as well, although I think her storyline actually had more to it) revolved around the journey and evolution of his relationship to Rachel. Say they got together in Season 6. For real this time, no more “breaks” or complications … Then what?

Would Ross and Rachel be considered the iconic pairing that many believe it to be (regardless of your personal feelings on the pair, I’m not a huge fan of them myself but)? Probably not.

It’s important to note, however, that it has more to do with a conscious decision on the writer’s part to drag out the ship and constantly have Ross and Rachel struggle with their feelings and milk the hell out of the will-they-won’t-they trope in order to best entertain their viewers. In the case of Ross and Rachel, the entire relationship pretty much depended on them never becoming full-out canon until the very end of the show for that story to work.

To apply this situation to Bellarke, I don’t think we need to worry too much. Because, as much as the media likes to refer to Bellarke as a will-they-won’t-they ship, the narrative itself has never actively strung the readers along in the same way. Mostly because the show itself and Bellamy and Clarke’s respective character arc’s don’t actually revolve around each other. Which means that they can still have an interesting relationship (and an interesting story) without relying on the potential romantic aspect of their relationship to carry them. Obviously, the question on whether they’ll become romantic or not is still there (and there are still many narrative reasons to suggest that it will), but the relationship itself doesn’t function only because of the will-they-won’t-they trope.

Basically, what that means is that Bellarke can develop in any way and their story can still continue. Unlike with Ross and Rachel, it doesn’t depend on the question of their feelings for each other in order to function.

b) Does the story itself end when the romantic pairing gets together (aka. an ultimate resolution to whatever the conflict in the show/book/piece of literature is)?

This is more specific to the romance genre, which quite literally revolves around the romantic couple itself. In a lot of romantic stories, the story ends when the couple finds a way to finally be happy together. And that’s it. And if you think about it, wouldn’t The Notebook be kind of boring if Noah and Allie just got together and instead of focusing on the conflict in their relationship, just let them be happy and carry on? Not much of a story to tell, is there?

But that’s the nature of the genre. It’s interesting to me that you mentioned that perhaps the sci-fi genre makes canon romantic couples especially boring. I actually disagree. Because the plot doesn’t revolve around/depend on romantic couples in order to continue, I think that actually makes it a lot easier for writers to have canon relationships that are still interesting. Those relationships don’t have to move the plot like they do in the romance genre, so it’s possible for them to exist and the story to still be suspenseful and intriguing.

So contrary to what you say, I think that the fact that Bellarke exists in a plot that is constantly moving and changing, even without their relationship, actually bodes quite well. It means that there is opportunity for that relationship to develop romantically and yet never become boring, because of the nature of the story (where stuff is ALWAYS happening and changing, which means that our characters/relationships are always changing too).

c) Will all conflict within a relationship be resolved by making it romantic, thus making it relatively uneventful and “boring”?

This is more specific to relationships where the main focus/conflict in their relationship is that they’re NOT together. Whether it’s because they’re struggling with their feelings for each other, or because they’re part of a love triangle (in some cases) or some other instance where any issues in their relationship that can be resolved by finally becoming canon - that’s what this question is specific to. I think that a lot of couples that are commonly referred to as slowburns fall under this section. Think Chuck and Blair in Gossip Girl. They hooked up and they tried having a relationship but it was never really some solid thing until the end of the series. And then there was nowhere else to run with it, right? The conflict was resolved (and oh my was there a lot of conflict in Chuck and Blair’s relationship :/) so the relationship wasn’t interesting anymore. It literally depended on the constant angst and denial of feelings and fighting and etc, etc.

Again, to bring it back to Bellarke, I really don’t think this situation applies to them because the conflict in their relationship has never been about them struggling with their romantic feelings for each other. It has always been about something else, so if they became romantic, it wouldn’t be a barrier to any interesting conflict/resolution the writers intend to pursue in the relationship. Therefore, their relationship wouldn’t automatically become “boring” just because they’re in an established relationship.

d) Is there room for the relationship to continue developing after becoming canonically romantic?

This is probably the most important question of all of them, and the one I was mostly referring to when I said that I don’t really believe in the moonlighting curse versus poor writing decisions. When writers are writing a slow burn, and they only focus on the lead-up to that relationship becoming romantic but NEVER consider what will happen after they finally reach that point … that’s where they run into troubles. THAT’S when it becomes boring. Why?

Because the relationship has already reached it’s endgame. It’s developed to the highest possible point that the writers ever planned for. They didn’t think about where they wanted that relationship to go after it became canonically romantic; therefore, it stops developing and becomes stagnant.

It has nothing to do with the couple or the characters themselves, and everything to do with the writer and their lack of vision beyond the ultimate goal (a kiss/love confession/established relationship/whatever it is).

This the question we’re currently facing with Bellarke, and here’s what we need to consider:

Is there room for Bellarke to develop after they become romantic? And the answer is this: yes, absolutely. There is ALWAYS room for development. It just depends on how committed to the relationship the writers are, and if they can continue to think of ways to keep the couple interesting and develop it.

In the case of The 100, it’s not as concerning, because the show has typically focused on the development and conflict between characters in relationships that are not necessarily romantic in nature. What this means is that the conflicts they’re used to telling don’t typically revolve around the transition from a non-romantic couple to romantic couple itself. Which means that any relationship probably won’t remain stagnant even after becoming romantic, so long as it gets sufficient focus. For more minor characters, their relationships won’t be developed as much. But since we already know that Bellamy and Clarke are the core of the show (confirmed by Jason Rothenberg himself), it’s pretty safe to say that the writers will never just let that relationship become stagnant. It’s essential to the story that it is constantly changing and evolving.

This is basically my extremely long-winded way of saying that I don’t think it’s really likely (or even possible??) for Bellarke’s relationship to ever become completely stagnant and boring because of the nature of the show, and their significance to the plot.

You brought up a quote from Eliza that she said and I’m not quite sure if it was a recent one or a different one I’m thinking of from back during Season 1. If it’s the latter, that was a long time ago and she said that she thinks it would be better to draw the relationship out a bit more. This is because slow burns are typically more interesting to viewers AND writers and are a lot more satisfying to watch. It doesn’t mean that the couple will never get together, it just means that it’s going to be a long journey. What I think Eliza was referring to is when a pair gets together almost right away and then it just feels … kind of pointless? Personally, I agree that those relationships are boring. They don’t do it for me. I like to see the characters grow and develop with each other first, and then become romantic.

A well-done slow burn (like Eliza was talking about) and a ship that’s been drawn on way past the point of natural development are two very different things.

To be honest, I think it’s also important to point out that Eliza can’t spoil anything to do with Bellarke and she was most likely deflecting that question to some extent. Cast interviews/panels should always be taken with a grain of salt.

also just because two characters get together it doesn’t mean that they’ll necessarily be “happy” right away which means that there is still story to tell

I’m rambling a bit now so I’m going to stop, let me know if you wanted more clarification in a certain area or if I didn’t quite interpret your question properly!

[blazerina]

(😁😁 Ask game! If you get this message, choose ANY fanfic/fanart/other prompt you want, and send that same prompt to three creative people in your fandom! Don't forget to include this message! 😁😁) Prompt: "I can't believe I just said that out loud."

@firefly-hwufanficwriter - this has taken me forever to respond to but here you go! The prompt was: I can’t believe I just said that out loud.

PS This was not what I was intentionally going to write but the inspiration kind of took over and here we are. :) Thanks for sending me this prompt!

“A Regular Tuesday” - The Sophomore - Chris x MC & James x MC

Bridget stared through the oven window at the baked pasta that was almost ready. While she watched the cheese pulse and bubbleover the edge of the glass dish it was cooking in, the smell settled over the kitchen like a cloud, and she began to imagine how delicious it would taste.

“This is going to be sooo good!” She clapped her hands in giddy excitement, as she declared the news aloud to an emptyhouse.  She and her friends had beenliving in Professor Vasquez’s old house for about 2 months now, and they were well into themiddle of their fall semester.  The kitchen was her favorite place to be. It made the house feel even more like home. This is where she could provide for those who meant the most to her. Baking and cooking brought life; not only through nourishment, but time together and and joy from one another’s company as people gathered to break bread at the table.  Feeling confident and at peace, Bridgetmoved to the refrigerator and pulled out some vegetables, closing the door withher foot while humming a Taylor Swift song.

She had been preparing for this meal for a few hoursnow.  The apron around her waist wasproof of that. It was smeared with tomato sauce and chocolate, from the pastaas well as the chocolate pie she made that was cooling on the counter.  This would be the first night in a few weeksthat she and James would have together. Even though it was a Tuesday, she wanted to do something special forhim. He had been majorly stressed lately as he tried to balance his work with the paper, upcoming graduation, finding ajob and his general search for perfection in all things.  Making dinner for him was the leastshe could do to take his mind off of those troubling situations for a while.

The timer on her cell phone rang out and she dropped thelast of some bell peppers into a bowl of salad she was mixingtogether.  As she pulled the pasta dishout of the oven, she heard the hinges on the front door screech as it swung open.

“You’re here early, my love!” She called, beaming as she turnedaround with potholders on her hands, holding out the pasta dish, clearly proudof her creation.

Her face fell when she realized it wasn’t who she wasexpecting.

“Oh, shoot. Bridge! I’m sorry – I didn’t know you werehaving a…a…thing…” Chris blushed slightly as he looked his roommate up anddown.

Her hair was up (which was not the norm) and her diamondstud earrings sparkled in the candlelight that was reflecting from candles she lit on the kitchentable.  She had pulled out all the stopsthis time.  Chris knew that she loved tocook but hadn’t really experienced it much. He was so busy with Student Government or football, that he wasn’taround that much anymore. He made sure of it. Being around her was too difficult these days.

As he continued to take her in, he noticed the gleam in hereye as she nervously laughed, placing the hot dish back into the oven to keepit warm.  Her simple black dress wasstrapless but casual at the same time. Small, white, lacy designs decorated the bottom of her dress and while her heelsaided in her height, she was still small. He smirked at the pink and yellow apron around her waist and the many fresh stains that had been wiped upon it.

“Hey! It’s no problem at all.” She chuckled, taking the pot holders off of her hands and returning toher salad.  “I assumed since it was just a regular ole Tuesday evening, everyone would be gone…” Bridget trailed off while she absentmindedly grabbed a peeler and began peelingcarrots to add to the salad.

“Practice out early?” She asked, focusing on the smallstrips of orange that were landing in the sink. 

Something had been different this year with Chris and she didn’t knowwhat it was.  They had been making an effort to spend more time together, as friends of course, but they had come to rely onone another in a new and different way.  

Bridget knew that she loved James and that James loved her.They weren’t having problems, they were stronger and closer than ever…but inthose moments when it was just Chris and Bridget, there was somethingdeveloping and it made her nervous.  

They had spent more time together over the summer and the past few months, one on one. Bridget was busy with her book and her own writing for the paper, but she still wasn’t as preoccupied with life as James was.

She wasn’t worried about her relationship with James. For the first time in a while, since the whole California debacle, they were in a good place.  He trusted her, she trusted him and they really worked to make time for one another when it felt like things were getting too hectic.  Tonight was supposed to be a prime example of that new-found intentionality that both of them were working to bring to their relationship.

Is it just me? Shethought to herself.  I can’t be the only one that feels like something has changed between us.  The way he stares.  He looks at me different…he’s looking at me right now, I can feel it.  What’s happening - why am I struggling with this? Sometimes I’m sad when I don’t see him or hear from him for a while…be cool, Bridget.  Don’t be awkward. This is Chris – one of your best friends!

Lately she hadn’t been able to stop thinking about move in day, when she and Chris met. Her mind always traveled back to the kiss they shared on the rooftop their very first night together at Hartfeld.  After the kiss that night, she laid awakethinking about their future and all the opportunities that were waiting for her.She was sure that Chris was her one true love and they’d be collegesweethearts, living out their 4 years at university together and riding offinto the sunset at graduation to live their lives and start another adventuretogether.  As things began to unravelwith Becca, the sorority, writing for Vasquez and meeting James, Chris fadedmore and more into the background.

Bridget was lost in her thoughts again before a sharp pain interrupted them. “Ow!”She seethed, quickly dropping the carrot and the peeler into the sink with aloud clang.  

“Shoot.” She muttered, clasping her hand.  “I always do this.”

“You okay?” Chris dropped his gym bag by the door and walkedquickly to her side.  “What’d you do?”

“I’m fine, thanks, it’s stupid.  The peeler missed the carrot and got myfinger.” She smiled sheepishly. “I wasn’t paying attention.”  

Her knuckle was bleeding, but she ran it undersome water anyway.  “So – how waspractice?” She asked again, trying to find a way to fill the void or ease thetension or whatever it was that was happening lately between them.

“Eh, it was alright.” Chris shrugged, opening therefrigerator and scratching the back of his head, absentmindedly.  

He didn’t know what he was looking for. He wasn’t hungry. Hewasn’t thirsty.  He felt like he was in afog.  It took every ounce of strength to take his eyes or hismind off of Bridget. And he didn’t want to.

Look at what I missed out on. He toldhimself.  I don’t know how much longer I can do this…the more time we spendtogether, the more I realize how much I like her…but James. He’s my friend too!And she adores him…look at what she’s done for him…wish it was for me…it couldhave been for me…if I wasn’t so stupid…

“Just alright?” Bridget persisted, wrapping a paper towelaround her injured finger.

Chris snapped out of his mental diatribe with the refrigerator door still open. Without lookingaway from the fridge he answered, “We ended early – it got really hot inside thepractice facility and people were getting sick, so coach called it.  No one drinks enough water.” He grabbed abeer from the fridge and cracked it open.

Bridget raised an eyebrow, looked down at the can and thenback up at him, “Thank goodness you’re perfect, then.” She smirked, biting herbottom lip to stifle a laugh.

“Hey.” He raised the can as if to toast her, “I earned thistoday.”  He took a long sip, let out asatisfied sigh and moved closer to her, as if he all of a sudden mustered upcourage.  He held his breath whilereaching out for her arm.

Her back was to him as she used one hand to mix the contentsof the salad bowl, when he gently grabbed her elbow, trying to force her toturn around.  “Let me see your wound.”

Bridget closed her eyes and exhaled slowly, feeling his skinagainst hers.  “It’s really nothing…” Shesaid slowly, almost whispering as she turned to face him.  

His eyes locked with hers as he took her hand in his.  “Bridget, I’m in love with you.” Chrissighed, but kept his eyes focused on her face. 

“I can’t believe I just saidthat out loud…” He glanced at the floor for a moment, scared, but determined.

“I have to tell you this now, or I’m never going to.  Every day I find myself more and more attracted to you. Themore I get to know you, the more I see of you, the closer we become…” Hetrailed off, still holding her hand, the damp paper towel around her finger,now unraveling a bit.

Bridget couldn’t help her eyes from growing wide. “Chris. I…we…”She stammered, inhaling sharply, not knowing what to say. The two of them werecloser together now, facing each other.  

“I’m so confused.” She confessed, breathlessly.  “What…what’sgoing on between us?”  

“Very good question, Bridget.  That’s what I’d like to know.” James voiceechoed in the quiet house as he stood in the entry to the kitchen, waiting foran answer.

—

Shout out to my girl @joyfulchoices who has taught me and given me a whole new appreciation for Mr. Christopher Powell. Thank you, friend!

[hugee0715]

"I'll look back on this and smile because it was life and I decided to live it."

I read that quote on the wall of a trampoline park while standing next to the restroom, totally covered in sweat. I was waiting for my girlfriend to finish after our 1 hour of jumping around ended.

I was standing there, waiting for her. My girlfriend. The girl I mentioned so many times. I was there with her. In Manila.

On the 10th of April I went to the airport for the first time in my life. I had a ticket and a passport in one hand, a suitcase handle in the other. My brother wasn't believing that I was doing this. The sister he used to have would never do this. For fucks sake, she wouldn't even travel 2 hours to spend a weekend at his place for years.

But now, I was going on a 22 hour trip. 12k kilometers, spending 3 weeks in a place I knew almost nothing about.

10 hours later I was in Beijing. I went through all the checkings and I still had about 7 hours of waiting for my next flight. So I went to an information desk to get access to the wifi. I got a code, I logged in, it was all going very smoothly up until I opened Messenger and nothing happened. I guess all my excitement made me forget that I will be in China for 7 hours, where all kinds of social media that I am using in my everyday life is blocked. So I wasn't prepared and I couldn't do anything. No Facebook, no Instagram, not even Chrome and of course the app store wasn't working either. I managed to send out a few quick emails saying that I am safe and sound, but after a few minutes my gmail wasn't working either. I found myself completely cut off.

I tried not to worry, hoping that everyone would just go with everything as planned even though they haven't really heard from me ever since I boarded in Hungary.

So at 8pm local time I got on my flight to Manila, starting to hear more and more people talk in tagalog around me.

1 am came around and we landed. Stepping out, I felt hot and humid air suddenly hitting me, which compared to the cold and dry air of the plane was a bit shocking, especially because I was still wearing two jumpers and jeans.

I walked down the long, carpeted isles, pulling my little carry on case after me, holding the immigration paper I got on the plane tightly. I already filled it out and soon I was standing in a line, waiting for my passport to be stamped. I was prepared to be asked the usual "What's the purpose of your trip?" question, but the guy really did not stop there. He had tons of follow up questions, about who am I visiting, why, where did I meet them, where am I staying, where I'll be going. But in the end, I got my first stamp in my passport and I was one baggage collecting away from leaving the airport.

I made my way out, with my love on the phone, trying to figure out where I needed to go. My heart was beating fast, I was sweaty, struggling with the two suitcases and the phone. She was full of nervs as well, I could hear it in her voice. It was her mum who I spotted first, she was frantically waving at me from the upper level. I stopped, I was scanning around trying to spot her, she was saying she can see me, but even though I was looking, I didn't really see anything around me. It was all just noise and movement, nothing recognizable. When she was only a few meters away, that's why I laid my eyes on her for the first time. Phone against her ear, a big smile. The black turtle neck I love with jeans. It felt so surreal, I didn't even have the opportunity to freak out. I ended the call and waited till she came closer, her mum arriving shortly as well. There wasn't any of the dramatic things you see on the internet. No running and collapsing in each other's arms. To be honest that seems too cliché. As much as I knew this person better than anyone else, it was still the first time we were physically in the same place.

We went to the car where I met the rest of the family, her dad, brother and sister. I was stunned, speechless at first. I saw them so many times, I heard so many stories and now it was reality.

I sat next to the window on the left side, she was in the middle. Our shoulders were touching. I intentionally moved even closer, I wanted to feel as much of her as possible. The warmth, her smell. Driving through dark streets I never thought I'd see. I looked down and her hand was extended, her palm facing up, waiting for mine to grab it. I took it and soon her fingers wrapped tightly around it. A scene at the airport with running and crying and screaming? No, thank you. This was the best welcome I could ever imagine. So much better than any of that could have been.

Days went by fast after that. Soon her graduation came, on the 16th of April. On the day that marked us being together for a year and a half. We went to the Philippine Arena, the biggest indoor one in the world apparently, but you need that when close to 3000 students are graduating. It was long so so long, but seeing her in her toga, with the make up I put on her earlier made me too proud to notice that I was tired untill it ended at around 11 at night. We stopped to eat at a Jollibee again and then I fell asleep on her shoulder on the way home.

Our days together were full of comfort. No feeling of anxiety, no feeling of having to be a certain way. It was natural, we clicked like nothing else. We had our unspoken roles, working together, managing daily tasks. We cooked, cleaned, did our grocery. We were responsible for ourselves. And we loved every second of it.

I also learned many new things about her. She's taller than she claims for example. And also a lot more thoughtful than she ever made herself seem. The little acts of giving me a glass of water whenever she drinks or leaving me mouthwash in the cup after she used it. Getting me just the right amount of food on my plate and always knowing what to get me at places so I would like them. Waiting for me to get ready and helping me choose clothes. Being concerned about me getting burnt. Maybe half of those things are involuntary, but I don't mind that. It might even make it a little better.

She's the reason I never got scared for a single moment while I was there, no matter what places we went to, how late or crowded it was. I got to experience life like a local, all the filipinos might have been looking at me and seeing a tourist, a foreigner, but I wasn't feeling like one. It was home and now I feel homesick for a city I spent 3 weeks in. Coming back to Budapest was devastating, I don't know if I'll ever feel the same way about it. I used to think it's the best city, my happy place and now? It feels foreign. Like it was never really my home.

On the day I left my brother said that he's going to get a completely different sister back after the trip. I shrugged him off, but he was right. There's nothing I feel the same way about. Especially Ileana, my love for her changed tremendously. I used to be in love with the idea of what we would be like. I remember that almost a year ago, on April 16, 2018, I made her a video as a gift for us being together for half a year. I remember talking about how lucky I am in it. Lucky, because I'll get to fall in love with her twice. And I was right, I did fall in love with her once again. The core parts of her were there, her voice, her mind, her ideas and the amazing conversations. But they all got upgraded. They all showed how there's so much more to her than what a video call can show. The angles I've never seen before, all the habits that she has. And it swept my feet right out of under me.

Malls, lemonade, Inasal, basketball, rice, nuggets, AC, sunburn, late night car rides, flamingos, donuts, happiness. Those words will forever be connected to our days in Tandang Sora. Or at least till we can be together again. Because our relationship is not about being on the phone anymore, that's not us. Us is when we are together. And we'll be together again soon, I promise.

"I'll look back on this and smile because it was life and I decided to live it."

That quote from that bathroom still crosses my head multiple times a day. I decided to live when I met Ileana. I decided to live when I realized that I'll have to do things in order to keep her. I decided to live when I left on this trip.

This is life. And I'll keep deciding to live it.