#and i will say it feels important to me that he regains his memory but equally important that it doesn't happen right away

[commsroom]

when it comes down to it, however much i think about eiffel's memory, whatever my reasoning might be, i think there's a much simpler core explanation for why i feel the way i do. i've said before that, if eiffel did regain his memory, i would want it to happen through 'an eiffel version of change of mind' i.e. a personal inner journey where the narrative he tells himself amounts to some greater reminder, self-confrontation, and self-realization. and that's just it:

eiffel regaining his memory wouldn't be a cop out to me for the same reason that lovelace not actually dying isn't a cop out: it's not just a story beat, it's a catalyst for character development & a better understanding of lovelace as a person. eiffel has spent his whole life trying not to be the person he is, and i just don't feel wolf 359 is the type of story to let him off the hook for that, when the ending is as much about accountability (to ourselves and to others and all the ways those responsibilities overlap) as it is about hope. i think there are ways you could argue that eiffel can still be eiffel without regaining his memory, but i think i've convinced myself that the symbolic resurrection / self-confrontation and acceptance of all the people he's been in the past, in order to move forward, is the more compelling option, especially for what it parallels, and the "eiffel is still eiffel" part is non-negotiable. it doesn't even feel like a question to me.

(and it makes the most sense to me in the context of eiffel's survivor's guilt - "of course i was fine. the driver's always fine." - and tendency towards a type of self-sacrifice and self-punishment that the show ultimately denies him / that doesn't address his real problem. he thinks sacrificing himself for the people he cares about will make up for something, but it won't. having him make that sacrifice and then keep living and keep being doug eiffel, with everything that means, feels like the natural extension of constructive criticism.)

in another story, or in a more theoretical context, there are all kinds of questions you could ask about whether eiffel's memory loss means he's a different person now, but in this case... i think it's better understood in narrative terms and what it represents for him as a character than any broader philosophical conclusion about the nature of the self and human consciousness. (and it is in no way as absolute as people sometimes behave like it is, considering he still has a concept of, like... everything. but that's a whole other topic of discussion.) most importantly, i just don't believe wolf 359 is a story about ideas as much as it is a story about people, these people, and in order to (hypothetically) continue to tell a story about doug eiffel, well. he has to still be doug eiffel. one way or another.

[sadnymi]

「 ✦ Silent treatment. ✦ 」 Mattheo riddle x reader

Summary: Giving Mattheo the silent treatment after an argument wasn't the best idea after all

Words: 5k

Warning: [smut , heavy smut , strong language NSFW]

On days like these, I feel an overwhelming urge to rearrange Mattheo's face. Despite our discussions and my heartfelt pleas, he seems to have a remarkable talent for ignoring everything I say.

The memory of our conversation echoed in my mind: my desperate pleas for him to leave that wretched boy alone, the hollow promises he'd made to appease me.

And now, that very same boy was lying in the hospital. Quite a coincidence, isn't it?

The cold shoulder was the only response I could muster, a potent cocktail of disappointment and anger simmering just beneath.

"Look," he started, a cocky edge to his voice, "that jerk had it coming. You can't just let people walk all over you."

My blood ran cold. He wasn't remorseful, he was proud. My icy glare intensified.

"So you think injuring someone and getting them suspended is the answer?" I countered, my voice laced with controlled fury.

He shrugged, a nonchalant act that did little to hide the flicker of unease in his eyes. "He'll learn his lesson," he muttered, avoiding my gaze.

“ so , are you “ my voice tinged with disappointment as I turned away, leaving him behind. Maybe I wasn't that hungry after all

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"Ah, I see you're in the mood for a silent treatment today," he remarked dryly as he leaned against the nearby wall, his tone laced with sarcasm. "Must be a new strategy in the art of communication, or perhaps it's just your way of keeping things exciting."

"Either way," he continued, a smirk playing at the corner of his lips, "I'm impressed by your dedication to the cause. Who needs words when we can communicate through meaningful silence, right?" His eyes sparkled with amusement as he waited for my response, clearly enjoying the playful banter.

"Meaningful silence?" I scoffed. "That's a new one, Mattheo. Very poetic."

He chuckled, the sound low and rich. "Hey, I'm just trying to keep up with your level of dramatics."

I crossed my arms, feigning offense. "My dramatics? You're the one who turns every situation into a Shakespearean tragedy."

He raised an eyebrow, his smirk widening. "Is that so? Well, I suppose every play needs a leading lady."

I couldn't help but smile despite myself. "And what role do you think you play in this drama?"

He leaned in closer, his voice dropping to a whisper. "The charming rogue, of course. The one who keeps the plot interesting."

I shook my head. "You certainly do that, Mattheo. Whether I like it or not."

His grin was infectious. "I'll take that as a compliment. Now, are you ready to break the silence and actually talk to me?"

“actually I have something to do “ i said

As I turned to leave, Mattheo's taunting words followed me. "Ignite me, Lady Macbeth."

I couldn't help but roll my eyes. "Don't flatter yourself," I retorted.

He grabbed my arm lightly as I tried to walk away. "Don't roll your eyes unless you want this conversation to continue somewhere else y/n "

"I have something important to do," I replied coolly, trying to free my arm from his grasp.

He persisted, asking, "Like what?"

"Visiting a patient in the hospital," I said, finally pulling away and smiling.

Mattheo chuckled. "You'll regret this little act, baby."

"I thought we were in a play," I quipped before turning and walking away.

Truth be told, I had no intention of visiting that snobby Gryffindor in the hospital. Mattheo's broken promise irked me, but I couldn't muster any sympathy for the boy who got what he deserved.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆

As the days went by, Mattheo's attempts to regain my attention became more evident. He started showing up unexpectedly in places I frequented, always with a casual excuse or a playful remark.

But today , today was something else , he deliberately sat closer to a group of giggling Ravenclaw girls, laughing a little too loudly at their jokes and engaging in animated conversation.

I couldn't help but notice, my eyes flickering over to his table every now and then. It was frustrating how effortlessly he could draw attention, even when he wasn't trying. I busied myself with my own friends, trying to ignore the pang of jealousy that crept into my chest.

However, Mattheo wasn't done with his antics. As the meal progressed, he caught my eye from across the room and winked mischievously. It was a subtle gesture, but it made my heart race in a way I didn't want to admit.

Feeling a surge of annoyance mixed with curiosity, I excused myself from my friends and made my way over to his table. "What's with the show?" I asked, trying to sound unaffected.

Mattheo grinned, leaning back in his chair casually. "Just trying to keep things interesting," he replied with a shrug. "Besides, it's not every day I get to make you jealous."

I scoffed, crossing my arms over my chest. "You wish."

He chuckled, his eyes sparkling with amusement. "Admit it, you were totally watching ."

“ well played riddle well played “ I walked away

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆

The days crawled by, each one painted in shades of frosty silence between Matteo and me. Rumors swirled around the school like rogue Bludgers. Had we finally called it quits? The question hung heavy in the air, fueled by Mattheo's brooding demeanor and my own steely resolve.

One particularly dreary afternoon, I found myself drowning my sorrows (or at least trying to ) in a big cup of apple juice in the library. Lost in a dusty tome about ancient magical creatures, I barely registered the approaching figure until a shadow fell across the page.

Looking up, I encountered a smug face I vaguely recognized – Zacharias Clifton, a Quidditch player from Ravenclaw notorious for his greasy hair and even greasier personality. "Mind if I join you, lovely?" he drawled, his voice dripping with a forced charm that made me cringe.

Before I could muster a response, he slid into the seat opposite me, invading my personal space with a confidence that reeked of entitlement. "So, I hear you're single these days," he continued, his eyes gleaming with a predatory glint.

I gritted my teeth, the urge to hex him into a toad growing stronger by the second. Just as I was about to unleash a verbal scathing of epic proportions, a familiar voice cut through the air.

"Actually, Clifton, she's very much taken."

Mattheo stood in the doorway, his usual swagger amplified tenfold. His gaze, however, wasn't directed at Zacharias, but at me. A flicker of something that looked suspiciously like possessiveness crossed his features before he turned his attention back to the unwelcome visitor.

"See your broomstick awaits," Mattheo said, his voice laced with a dangerous edge. "Don't let me keep you from your precious practice."

Zacharias, his face a comical shade of purple, sputtered something incoherent before gathering his dignity (or what little he possessed) and retreating with a disgruntled scowl.

The library door swung shut with a satisfying thud, leaving Mattheo and me alone in the hushed silence. My heart hammered against my ribs, a chaotic rhythm that seemed to echo in the stillness.

Mattheo took a tentative step forward, his hand hovering in the air for a moment before gently settling on the back of my chair. "Can we talk?" he murmured, his voice a husky whisper.

"Yeah, just not here," I managed to get the words out, my voice barely above a whisper.

"Lead the way," he said, his arm tightening around me possessively as we walked out of the library

The anger that had simmered within me for days threatened to fade once I saw him, and it just hit me how much I missed him.

As we made our way to our secret chamber (the hidden chamber we found last year and claimed as ours),tucked away from the curious eyes and whispers of Hogwarts, Mattheo's touch took on a possessive edge. His hands found every excuse to claim me, a silent proclamation to the entire school that I was still his .

With each step down the narrow passage, Mattheo drew me closer, his fingertips tracing tantalizing patterns on my skin. The sensation sent delightful shivers through me, igniting a quiet thrill of belonging in his arms amidst the bustling halls of our magical world.

The soft glow of the hidden chamber beckoned us, casting an enchanting ambiance that mirrored the intimacy between us.

As soon as we were finally in , I turned to him,my voice tinged with anger."What was that all about ? A show for the audience ? "

He met my gaze, a playful glint simmering beneath the surface of his seriousness. "Just reminding everyone that you're happily taken."

"Happily?" I scoffed, pushing against his arm, "We haven't spoken a word to each other in days!"

He leaned even closer, his voice dropping to a husky whisper. "And whose fault is that, love? " His warm breath tickled my ear, sending shivers cascading down my spine.

My cheeks burned, a mixture of annoyance and something else entirely swirling within me. "Yeah, going to blame that all on me now?"

"No," he paused, his eyes searching mine. "I just don’t understand why you're so mad about what I did to that perk."

I sighed, "it’s not about him , Mattheo… You know that," I conceded, my voice softer than I intended. "It’s about the promise you made and broke. You know how much I hate that."

It stirred up emotions I'd rather forget. Let's just say, coming from a family where promises were often broken had its drawbacks.

"So you've chosen to give me the silent treatment instead of talking it out? Is that your solution y/n?"

I scoffed, crossing my arms defensively. "I didn’t expect it to drag on this long. I was upset,but Maybe then I get tired of being treated like an afterthought."

"An afterthought?" he scoffed back, incredulous. "You haven't spoken to me in days!"

"And whose fault is that?" I shot back, my voice rising. "You waltzed over to those Ravenclaw girls like they were the only ones who existed!"

"That was a stupid attempt to get your attention, alright!" he snapped, his frustration boiling over. "I never meant to make you feel like an afterthought."

"But you did!" I yelled, my voice echoing in the damp chamber.

He ran a hand through his hair, his frustration evident. "I messed up, okay? I know that! But instead of talking to me about it, you shut me out."

"And what was I supposed to do?" I countered, my voice softening slightly. "Sit back and watch you flirt with every girl who walks by?"

"It wasn't flirting!" he defended, his voice strained.

"Then what was it?" I challenged, narrowing my eyes. "Because from where I was standing, it looked an awful lot like flirting."

"That's not fair," he said, his voice low. "And what about what you said? Visiting that perk in the hospital? Was that supposed to make me feel better?"

He was so close that I could feel his breath on my face

"Maybe I overreacted about Michael," I mumbled, finally breaking the silence.

"Maybe you did," he agreed cautiously anger in his eyes and lips so close to mine

“it’s really fucking rich of you to push the blame into me “ I screamed in his face frustration boiling over

“yet i was the only one putting in the effort to fix things!” He said back with lips so close to mine

“you didn’t even —” pulling me close. In a rush his lips were on mine I didn’t get to finish the words . It took a few moments for me to come to my senses; letting my eyes flutter closed as i kissed him back. The kiss wasn't gentle or sweet. It was needy and heated as mattheo’s tongue moved against mine.

In an instant, I found myself pressed against the wall, his mouth devouring me hungrily. His hand on the back of my neck drew me closer, while the other rested on my waist, kneading the flesh there. He pulled away slightly, speaking against my lips “ jump”He ordered, and I complied wrapping my legs around him

"Mattheo—" He silenced me once more with a kiss.

His black hair was hanging down into his face, so i pushed it back. 

As he ended the kiss, his hands reached for my robe, tossing it aside. Next, his fingers trailed to the hem of my shirt, pulling it upward. Throughout, his gaze remained locked with mine as he removed the shirt, adding it to the pile on the ground. . “If you just wanted a dirty fuck , you should have just asked” 

Gently placing me on the bed, he observed as I sank into the soft sheets. He removed his shirt and joined me, straddling my hips without a word. His eyes held mine as he pushed up my skirt. "This stays," he stated firmly, maintaining direct eye contact.

He then moved to hook his fingers in the waistband of my underwear. Slowly, he pulled down the lace material, causing me to close my eyes in response to the sensation.

"Matt, what are you doing?" I asked breathlessly, feeling his warm breath against my thighs.

His hands glided up and down my thighs, eliciting a soft moan from me as I savored the sensation of his skin against mine. It had only been a week, but I missed this closeness immensely.

My eyes flew open as his hands gently spread my legs, his face drawing closer between my thighs.“ You’re so wet for me.” he chuckled cockily “ i this a new kink we just discovered “

“you’re so full of Yourself .” I didn’t help the smile that comes

“and you’re about to be full of me, so what does that make us?” He Murmuring as His hands wrapped around my thighs, pulling me closer to his mouth.

“ Merlin's Beard! “I moaned so loudly

never breaking eye contact as his tongue lapped at my wetness. I moaned loudly, the sensation overwhelming me as Matt's tongue explored my wetness. Each flick of his tongue and gentle suck sent waves of pleasure coursing through my body, making me tremble beneath him. My heart raced, the sound echoing in my ears as I expressed how much I had missed him.

"God, Matt, I missed you so much," I moaned, my mouth agape and my toes curling into the sheets. My hands instinctively tangled in his hair, urging him on with each movement. I cried out his name as the intensity built, feeling like I was on the brink of ecstasy.

But then, it stopped.

Confused and desperate, I lifted my head from the pillow, tears in my eyes as I struggled to catch my breath. "Why... why did you stop?" I cried out, my voice a mixture of frustration and need.

Matt flashed me an amused smile, teasing me further with a kiss to my aching clit. My breathing quickened again as he kissed along my inner thigh, deliberately avoiding where I wanted him most.

"Matt," I whimpered, regretting the frustration I must have caused him. His kisses trailed back up my body until he was face to face with me, watching me quiver beneath him.

"Please," I begged softly, feeling the desperation creeping into my voice.

“ what is it my sweet girl? “ He brushed my hair aside and planted a gentle kiss on my forehead. "You've been teasing me all week," he murmured, his eyes filled with desire. "Wearing those short skirts, laughing with my friends, giving me the silent treatment."

He kissed me again, his touch sending shivers down my spine. "I've wanted nothing more than to take you right then and there , to fuck you senseless that my name will be the only thing you remember " he confessed, his voice husky with desire.

His lips trailed down to my earlobe, where he bit it softly, eliciting another moan from me. His mouth continued its journey, claiming every inch of my body with his tongue and teeth, until he reached my chest.

I arched back, silently pleading for his attention on my breasts. With a teasing hook of his finger, he slid down the neckline of my top, removing the lace of my bra in the process. His mouth captured one nipple, sucking slowly while his free hand caressed the other.

His actions sent shivers down my spine as he licked, sucked, and bit, creating a delicious rhythm that had me gasping for more.

"I'm sorry," I cried out, tears welling up in my eyes. "I missed you so much, and seeing you laughing with those girls hurt."

"I know, my sweet girl, I know," he whispered, his head buried between my legs once more. "Let me make it up to you."

With renewed fervor, he sucked harshly on my clit, his fingers pumping in and out of me rhythmically. The combination of sensations overwhelmed me, and I couldn't help but moan in pleasure.

As my body reached its peak, I gripped his hands tightly, feeling the fluttering release of my orgasm. I moaned his name loudly, I moaned his name probably too loudly for ghosts in the castle liking, pulled him up for a passionate kiss, savoring the taste of myself on his lips.

“Turn around,” he says,

I obeyed his command to turn around, and he slowly unpinned my hair, letting it cascade down my back in loose waves. He pushed it over one shoulder with deliberate care, his fingers trailing down my spine, igniting goosebumps along my skin , his fingers trailing down my spine, brushing the skin on my back.

His lips found their way to my neck, planting soft kisses that trailed down to my shoulder. Then, I felt his fingertips running along my skin again, sending a shiver of anticipation through me. His touch entered my hot, dripping core, and I couldn't help but let out a loud moan, begging for more.

"Do you like that?" he asked, his voice filled with desire.

"Yeah," I managed to say between moans.

“Is this why you were shouting nonsense at me? Because all you really wanted was me to fuck you senseless? Huh?” His words were like fire, and as he added another finger, I couldn't help but scream in pleasure.

continued to pump his fingers into me, increasing the intensity with each stroke. his finger got faster and faster His thumb pressed onto my clit, sending waves of pleasure through my body, gripping the bedding hard as the third finger carefully joins the others hitting my g-spot continuously , trying to close my legs, his free hand keep them parted I felt my orgasm building stronger than ever before, my body unable to contain the pleasure.

He turned me around, kissing my cheek softly before returning to my open mouth, sucking my bottom lip between his own. "That was so hot," he grunted, concern lacing his tone. "Are you alright baby ?"

I took a moment to gather my thoughts, my chest heaving with each breath. Despite the intensity of the moment, my predominant feeling was one of satisfaction and desire.I hummed

“ need words my love “

"Yes Matt I’m alright " I managed to say, pulling him down for a deep, passionate kiss.

His hips pressed against mine as we kissed, his covered arousal rubbing against my heat, sending a surge of desire through me. I trailed my hands down his muscular back until I reached the waistband of his sweatpants.

"Baby, stop," he murmured, concern lacing his tone. "Are you sure you want to keep going? I don’t want you to feel overwhelmed."

"I've never been more sure about anything," I whispered, kissing his cheek. "I missed you, I want you."

He moaned as I touched his erect member through the fabric, his breath hitching slightly. "You need to stop, love," he managed to say, his voice strained with desire.

"Sorry," I replied, pulling my hands away quickly. He leaned down to kiss my neck softly, causing me to close my eyes and wrap my arms around him.

"You never have to apologize," he whispered against my earlobe before whispering, "I’m going to make love to you," and pressing his lips to mine in tender kisses. then onc again pressing his lips to mine in sweet, sweet kisses.

one of my favourite thing about mattheo is how gentle he can be. He can be so passionate when he wants to and right now i can feel the love behind his kisses. 

Feeling his cock tapping against my clit a few times, I couldn't help but let out a moan as he guided himself into me. Taking hold of my leg again, he used them both as leverage to push himself fully inside me. I moaned into his ear, my breath hitching in anticipation.

"Fuck," I whispered, watching him mutter under his breath as he slid in and out of me slowly. The sensation was incredible; I could feel every inch of him dragging over my most sensitive parts.

"Keep those pretty eyes on me, baby," he whispered, and I opened my teary eyes slowly, doing as he said. He smiled, his gaze filled with desire. "That's it, good girl ."

Still buried deep inside me, his movements began to pick up speed. My breath caught in my throat as pleasure surged through me.

"Oh," I gasped, my head dropping back as my mouth fell open in pleasure.

"You feel so fucking good," he grunted with each thrust. "So fucking mine."

I hummed in response, words escaping me as Mattheo continued to drive me wild. With each thrust, my moans grew louder, reaching a crescendo of pleasure.

"Mattheo," I moaned, his name leaving my lips like a prayer.

"That's it, baby," he replied, his lips devouring mine softly. "So beautiful, moaning my name like that."

With a gentle touch, he pushed my hair out of my face before placing his hands on my cheeks. His eyes roamed my face while he continued to thrust into me at a slow, deliberate pace. I looked at him with half-lidded eyes, my chest rising and falling with rapid breaths.

As he started to thrust harder, I grabbed a fistful of the sheets, feeling the intensity building within me. His hips bucked against me, his face buried in the crook of my neck. The faster pace and increased pressure caused my eyes to roll back in my head. I was on the edge of my high, having come so close moments earlier.

"Mattheo, I can't wait any longer," I screamed out, wrapping my legs around his torso tightly and intertwining our hands.

"Not yet," he grunted, turning his head to meet my gaze. He continued to move in and out of me, keeping eye contact as he held himself up by his forearms. I was so sensitive that the delay in my orgasm began to ache, and I felt the need to let go.

"Please, let me cum, baby," I pleaded, sounded desperate, begging him not to pull away at the last minute again. "I can't..."

And just as I was about to reach my breaking point, he freed one of his hands and snuck it between us, his fingers expertly rubbing at my clit and pushing me over the edge.

"I need you to do something for me, pretty girl. Want to try something?" he asked, and I nodded, willing to do anything he asked in that moment.

He kept everything slow, almost torturous, building up the tightening pressure inside of me with each pass before thrusting so hard the next time that I felt like I was going to pass out.

"Don't be nervous," he murmured, kissing my forehead. "Just relax and let go. I'll keep going until you tell me to stop." His soft tone sent flutters through my heart, and I nodded in response.

My breath hitched as his hand returned to my clit, igniting a fire in my belly. His hard thrusts hit my g-spot, and I screamed out, clinging onto his hand as if my life depended on it.

"Shit," I hissed, feeling him deep inside me, the pleasure building into a heavy weight in my gut. A tingling sensation hummed through my limbs.

"Let go, baby," he ordered, and I did just that as waves of pleasure crashed over me. It was an intense release unlike anything I'd ever felt before, leaving me shakily tilting my head up, tears in my eyes as I watched clear fluid gushing out of me each time Mattheo pulled back.

When he noticed me watching, he withdrew entirely, bringing his soaked fingers to my clit and rubbing fast circles that made me cry out loudly as my muscles spasmed again. Without his presence inside me, an unbroken stream of fluid rushed out, spraying over the bed sheets.

"Oh my god," I whimpered, needing a moment to focus on the overwhelming sensations. Mattheo made a noise of appreciation, reentering me, the wet sounds now more intense as he pushed in again.

"That's my good girl, you just squirted for me, baby. See how good you are," he praised, his words adding to the intensity of the moment.rl you just squirt for me baby see how good you are ”

Pounding into my g-spot hard enough to make my legs shake, he elicited another wave of pleasure that rolled through me. Instinctively, my body responded to Mattheo's instructions, bursts of arousal shooting out of me as I moaned softly with each pump of his hand.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck," I gasped in sync with his movements.

"Holy shit," Mattheo rasped as he drew his fingers out again, groaning when he returned to my clit and easily worked even more wetness out of me. "You just keep fucking cuming, baby."

I could barely process what he was saying. "Please, cum inside me, Matt," I wanted to mention that I finally got on pills this week but couldn't find the energy to.

"Yeah?" He breathed, "Want me to cum inside this pretty pussy?" Thrusting hard, his fingers still circling my clit, I moaned out his name as I squirted again and again. My pussy started to quiver as he continued to fuck me through it, crying out loudly when I felt him coming inside me as well.

Wetness splashed out of me in endless spurts, soaking my cunt, his hand, and the bed. It felt like I was coming for hours, amazed at what my body was capable of.

"You okay, my love?" He asked, concern evident in his voice as he looked down at me. My eyes were closed, and I gave no indication that I was listening to him, feeling like I had passed out for a second.

"Hey angel, open your eyes to me, please," Mattheo implored, kissing my cheeks and rubbing his thumb soothingly.

"Yeah, I just need a moment," I managed to whisper, feeling drained. "I think you ruined me, Matt," I added with a weak smile.

He chuckled softly, giving me kisses all over my face. "Yeah?" he teased.

"In a good way though," I reassured him.

With a small grunt, Mattheo pushed himself off of me and sat up from the bed. I reached out for him, not wanting him to leave my side yet. He chuckled at my antics, lightly grasping my hand and stroking my fingers before letting it go and stepping away.

"Just going to grab a few things to clean you up, love. I promise I’ll be right back," he assured me.

Nodding, I closed my eyes again, too exhausted to do anything else.

"I brought you some water, darling. You should drink a little," he said as he sat back down on the bed next to me, helping me sit up a bit. I complied lazily, sipping from the glass he held against my lips.

"Now, spread your legs a little, sweetheart. I need to clean you up. Not too sore?" He asked as he gently cleaned me up with a washcloth, my body still sensitive .

As he cleaned me up and tidied the sheets, I felt sleep starting to take over me, comforted by his warmth and embrace. He kissed my face a few times and chuckled softly before I finally drifted off to sleep, feeling content and loved.

"I don’t think I would ever be able to walk again," I joked softly .

"I would carry you then," he replied affectionately.

"Since it’s all your fault, so yes," I teased, feeling a mix of emotions.

"I’m so sorry," he apologized sincerely

"Matt—"

"No, listen. I’m really sorry for everything. It was all my fault from the start. I shouldn’t have promised you that and then go and break it the next day," he admitted regretfully.

“ I’m so sorry too “ I hugged him tightly, hiding my face in his neck as he wrapped his arms around me, pulling the blanket over us.

"Can we sleep here tonight?" I asked, wanting to be close to him.

"We can do anything you want, baby. I will do whatever you want," he promised, kissing my forehead.

"I love you so, so much," I whispered, feeling sleepiness creeping in.

"I love you so much too, my love," he replied, kissing my forehead back.

"Baby?" he said after a moment.

"Yeah?" I replied, feeling sleepy.

"Did you ever think about kids?" he asked, surprising me.

I laughed softly. "What?"he said

"I’m on pills, baby. I finally managed to get them," I explained, resting my head on his chest as I got ready to sleep.

"Baby?" he said again, and I hummed in response.

"Just for your information, I’m going to hit that Zacharias boy so hard tomorrow he can join Michael in the hospital, and Michael doesn’t have to feel lonely anymore. I’m telling you now,"

"I was thinking about hexing him into a toad, but we can decide tomorrow," laughing while giving him one last kiss I said .

[steddiehyperfixation]

don't you forget about me (part two)

(part one)

Steve doesn’t know how long they sit there in silence, waiting. It’s making him insane. The seconds pass too slow; the seconds pass too fast. His mind is a storm; his mind is empty. He’s feeling too much; he’s not feeling at all. He paces the room; he sits catatonically against a wall. He needs to get out of here; he needs to stay. 

He’s been here before, just barely over a week ago, tense and anxious and despairing and waiting for news. But waiting to hear if Eddie will ever remember him again really should not feel this much worse than waiting to hear if Eddie will ever fucking breathe again. Steve thinks there must be something wrong with him. He’s being selfish and stupid. His pathological fucking need to be loved is not what’s important right now. Eddie is alive and awake and okay and that’s the only thing that really matters. That’s the only thing he should really care about.

Steve’s pacing again now, yanking his hands through his hair as he does laps around the room until Eddie finally appears in the doorway. 

Eddie must’ve just cracked a joke or something because the nurse is laughing as she pushes his bed into the room and he’s got this adorable grin on his face. Steve’s heart twists in his chest and he nearly bursts into tears all over again because god does he want nothing more than to press a kiss to those dimpled cheeks. 

“Good news, boys,” Eddie announces. “My brain is fully intact.”

“There’s no physical permanent damage to his brain,” the nurse elaborates. “His amnesia is likely a result of psychological trauma and the temporary disruption of brain function from blood loss and lack of oxygen that occurred at the time of his injury. But there is no obvious reason why he shouldn’t regain his full memory, given time.” 

So there’s hope. Steve breathes a sigh of relief. 

“That is good news,” Wayne agrees. 

Steve asks, “How much time?” 

The nurse gives an unhelpful shrug. “Impossible to say. It could be anywhere from days to months, or even years. I’m sorry, there’s no way for us to know.” 

Years. “Okay.” Steve pinches the bridge of his nose. He can keep it together. He can. “Thanks,” he tells the nurse. “I, uh-” He makes the mistake of looking at Eddie who looks right through him, and Steve can’t keep it together anymore actually. “I gotta update the kids,” he mutters, backing his way towards the door. Wayne nods in acknowledgment; no protests this time at Steve’s excuse to leave.

“See ya, Harrington,” Eddie calls after him, casual, impersonal, like they're nothing more than acquaintances passing by each other in a high school hallway.  

Steve can’t get out of that hospital fast enough. 

He makes it to his car in record time, slamming the door shut and sinking heavily into the driver’s seat. A ragged sob tries to claw its way up his throat now that he’s finally alone, but he forces it back, staving off his breakdown for just a little bit longer. As much as it was an excuse, he really does have to update the kids. 

Steve fishes his walkie out of the glove box. “Code - whatever, I don’t know. Code Eddie,” he says. He doesn’t remember the kids’ system of codes, nor would he be sure which one this news falls under even if he did. 

“Is he okay? Is he awake?” comes an immediate, eager response from Dustin. “Over.” 

“Yeah, he’s awake, and he’s fine, except he’s got pretty bad amnesia. The doctors say it should be temporary, but right now he doesn’t remember anything since May of ‘85,” Steve explains, trying his best to keep his voice even.

“Steve, come pick me up and take me to see him,” Dustin demands, “right now. Over.” 

“Me too. Over,” Mike chimes in before Steve can respond. 

“And us,” Erica adds as well. 

Steve pauses for a second, both to steady his own breath and to make sure no one else wants to jump in on this too, before he reminds them, “He won’t know you, any of you.” 

“I don’t care,” Dustin says, bossy as ever. “Just come get me. Over.” 

“Jesus Christ, kid,” Steve mutters to himself. He sucks in another breath; it wobbles dangerously. He’s just about reached his limit on how long he can keep himself from falling apart. “I- I need a minute, alright?” he manages through the walkie. “Can you just give me, like, an hour? And then I’ll take you guys to visit Eddie.” 

Steve doesn’t wait for a response before he slams the antenna closed, tosses the walkie aside, and finally, finally lets himself shatter. That sob rips free from his throat, followed by another and another and another. Tears flood from his eyes; his nose runs. It’s an ugly, gross, visceral cry that leaves him exhausted and raw and aching to be held by the time the last sob shudders out of him. Drained and hollow, he craves the embrace of someone who knows him, someone who loves him. 

He sweeps up his broken pieces, wipes the mess of tears and snot off his face, and drives to Robin’s house.

“Steve, oh my god.” Robin pulls him into a hug the second she opens the door and sees the look on his face. Steve clings to her. “What happened?” 

“Eddie’s awake,” he mutters dismally. 

“Oh! Not the tone I’d expect you to deliver that news in, but okay.” Robin pulls back, looking at him with narrow-eyed concern and confusion as she analyzes his puffy eyes and red nose and swollen lips. “And you look like you’ve just been crying because…?”

“Because he doesn’t remember me, Rob,” Steve sighs. “He doesn’t remember anything from the past 11 months.” 

Robin’s eyes go wide now. “Shit,” she says, so plainly it startles a short laugh out of Steve. 

“Yeah,” he agrees. “Shit.” 

She asks him more questions as she walks down the hallway so they can talk in her room. Steve once again reiterates what was said at the hospital. 

“So you didn’t tell him you two were a thing?” Robin asks, closing her door behind them. 

“Of course I didn’t.” Steve flops back onto her bed. “I didn’t want to spook him.” 

She sits beside him. “You didn’t want to spook him,” she repeats, looking down at him with raised eyebrows, “but you told him about Vecna.” 

“Well, yeah. I just-” He lifts his arms to gesture vaguely into the air as he tries to explain himself. “I mean, imagine how you would feel if you woke up in a hospital and some random guy you’ve spoken to maybe twice was by your bedside telling you you’ve been in a relationship with him for the past 9 months.” 

“Uh, I don’t know, dingus, probably about the same as I’d feel if said guy told me I’d nearly died fighting some evil twisted creature from a hell dimension,” Robin retorts.

Steve drops his hands onto his chest with a huff, shaking his head. “No, trust me. He seemed far less surprised by that than he did to hear that we were even just friends,” he says, a bit bitterly. Tears are pricking at his eyes again as he looks up at his best friend. “You didn’t see the way he looked at me, Robin. All he saw was King Steve.”

Robin softens, snark replaced with sympathy. “That sucks, Steve. I’m so sorry.” 

Steve sighs in agreement that yes this really fucking sucks. He sits up and scoots back so that he’s slumped against the wall, hitting the back of his head against it. “I think I’m a horrible person,” he admits, just venting now, “because of course I’m glad Eddie’s alive and all I really want is for him to be okay, and I know the nurse said he should remember eventually, but there’s still some sick part of me that thinks maybe it would’ve hurt less if he had just died.”

“I don’t think that makes you a horrible person,” Robin assures him as she settles next to him, shoulder to shoulder. “I think you’re just grieving, and grief is weird sometimes.”

“It was one of the worst things I’ve ever felt,” he mutters, “when he looked at me without recognition. To see it on his face, just the- the absence of everything that we’d built. I’ve never felt so- so- I don’t know, it was like I couldn’t breathe. He just- he doesn’t know that I love him. He…he doesn’t know that he loved me...” 

Because that’s what it is, isn’t it? It’s not that he’s lost someone that he loves, it’s that he’s lost someone who loves him. Because Eddie’s not gone, just his love for Steve is, and that’s what’s tearing him apart. It’s the fact that there’s one less person in the world who loves him. It’s the fact that Steve’s got this big gaping hole inside of him that’s always made him so desperate to be loved, liked, wanted, needed; and his biggest fucking fear is becoming obsolete. He could probably trace it back to his parents, the first to forget him, the first to stop loving him, but the fact remains that now Eddie has fulfilled that fear too. Now Eddie has carved that pit a little deeper, a little darker, validating the voice that whispers within it and tells Steve that he is forgettable, unlovable, so easy to abandon and erase. 

“Well, I love you,” Robin tells him, like she can read his mind (which, at this point, she probably can). She slides an arm around his shoulders, hugs him close. “And I’m not going anywhere.” 

Fragile as he is right now, Steve falls apart again in her arms, and she holds him together. Because she knows him, because she loves him.

It’s a quieter cry this time, soft and sniffly. Whereas the last one wracked through his body and left him fatigued, this one flows from him almost gently, and when his tears finally subside and he lifts his head from where it had been buried in his friend’s shoulder, Steve actually feels a little bit better, a little bit stronger. Which is good, because he’s gonna have to face Eddie again soon. 

“Thank you,” he says quietly as he pulls away from Robin, wiping at his eyes and glancing at the clock on her nightstand. It’s definitely been an hour by now, probably more. He stands. “I have to go, I promised the kids I’d take them to see Eddie.” 

“Then I’m coming too.” Robin stands with him. “For moral support.” 

Steve gives her a grateful smile. “I love you so fucking much, you know that?” 

“Yeah.” She grins at him. “I know.” 

~ 

The nurses have changed his bandages and upped his morphine, so Eddie’s considerably hazy now but at least he can raise his headrest and prop himself up a bit without nearly blacking out from pain. He’s boredly flicking through channels on the shitty TV in front of him, alone since Wayne had to leave for work, when Harrington returns followed by a very unexpected group consisting of Robin Buckley and four strange children. 

“Sorry,” Harrington announces their presence with an apologetic shrug, “I know you don’t know them anymore, but they insisted.” 

“Eddie!” a pudgy, curly-haired kid shouts before Eddie can even react, coming barrelling towards him and trying to hug him. 

“Ow!” Eddie yelps, pain flaring even through the extra morphine. “Fucking Christ, kid! Be careful!” 

The kid jumps back immediately, eyes wide. “Shit. Sorry.” 

“S’fine,” Eddie grumbles.

The kid looks at him expectantly for a moment before seeming to realize, “Oh, right, you don’t remember me. I’m Dustin.” 

“Ah, so you’re the guy I sacrificed myself for,” Eddie mutters, and Dustin looks a little sheepish. That means these must be ‘the kids’ Harrington had been talking about earlier. He surveys the group for a second. “Actually, I think we have met before,” he tells Dustin. “And you too.” He glances at a pale, dark-haired kid. The other two - a Black boy with a flat-top and a younger Black girl - look less familiar, though. “There was this, uh, open day thing at the high school for next year’s incoming freshmen; I talked to you about Hellfire.”

“Yeah!” Dustin’s whole face lights up, so bright and infectious it makes Eddie grin too. “Yeah, you did!” 

“So you guys joined the club, then?” 

This sparks a very animated conversation about D&D, the rest of the kids (Mike, Lucas, and Erica, as they soon reintroduce themselves) gathering around his bed now too to join in. It makes him feel a bit more like himself again, familiar, normal. Except, of course, for the fact that they’re not only talking about how they defeated Vecna in Eddie’s “totally epic” and “sadistic” campaign (adjectives courtesy of Dustin and Mike respectively), but also filling in more pieces of the story of how they defeated him in real life too. Still, it’s nice, fun. He totally understands how he could’ve gotten attached to these kids.

At some point, Eddie glances over to find Harrington hanging back and just watching them talk, fondly, wistfully. Robin whispers something to him and he sort of smiles, just a trace, and whispers something back. They seem close, intimate. Eddie wonders if they’re dating, and then he wonders why that thought makes him feel a bit sick. He waves them over. Harrington looks like he’s about to protest, but Robin gives him a Look and he allows her to grab his hand and drag him to join the crowd around Eddie’s bed. 

“So, what’s your deal, Buckley?” Eddie asks her. He doesn’t know her very well, they’ve only crossed paths a few times in the bandroom, but right now that makes her the most familiar person in the room to him. “Are you and Harrington a thing now? Is that how you’re involved in all this?” 

Robin wrinkles her nose and drops Harrington’s hand. “Ew, no. Definitely not.” 

“She’s my best friend,” Harrington says. 

Eddie snorts, doesn’t know why he finds that so comical. (He’s starting to get tired and it’s making him loopy. Or maybe it’s just the morphine.) “You've got a funny choice of friends nowadays, don’t you? Me and band geek Buckley and a bunch of nerdy freshmen.” He looks at Harrington with incredulous amusement. “Who would've thought, huh? Steve Harrington, collector of geeks and freaks.” 

Harrington doesn’t seem to find it as funny. He shrugs. “Yeah, well, it’s better than King Steve, collector of asshole bullies and shallow one-night stands.” 

“Yeah, ‘course it is,” Eddie agrees through another huff of laughter that breaks off into a yawn. “Didn’t mean it as a bad thing, Stevie. Was a compliment.” 

“Alright.” The barest hint of a smile flickers across Harrington’s face now, but then he’s looking away and corralling the kids and saying, “We should head out, let you get some rest.” 

And Eddie kind of wishes he’d stay.

(part three!)

taglist: @romanticdestruction @daydreamsandcrashingwaves @paintsplatteredandimperfect @hallucinatedjosten @mugloversonly @estrellami-1 @alongcomesaspider @thatonebadideapanda @tell-me-a-secret-a-nice-one @dragonmama76 @wxrmland @nuggies4life @sirsnacksalot @myguiltyartpleasure @marklee-blackmore @vinteraltus @sebastiansstanswhore @0happyeverafter0 @scarlet-malfoy (only tagged people who explicitly asked to be tagged; if you would like to be added or removed from this list please lmk!)

[bby-deerling]

helloooooo!!! Conrgats on 250 followers!!! You absolutely deserve it, I love how you write for law and zoro :)

for the event, may I request law + gone too soon? thank you for writing!!

hiiiiiii anon!!! thank you so much for the praise, lovely!!! it means the world to me <3

law + gone too soon (sfw, gn!reader)

wc: 987 masterlist

ft. a bit of angst, manga spoilers, strawhat!reader

Law hadn’t expected his personal feelings to cause a snag in his plans.  He wasn’t one for getting entangled in affairs of the heart, having a near endless amount of more important things to do; however, there was just something about you that piqued his curiosity, giving him no choice but to lurk around you like an oversized, slightly temperamental black cat. 

When your crew splits up in Zou, he prays you’ll go with your Captain, and curses under his breath when he realizes just how difficult it will be to ignore your proximity while submerged under the waves in the Polar Tang.  Unknowingly, you throw wrenches in his plan to avoid you, routinely seeking him out in his office, especially late at night when sleep is unfortunately not an option for either of you.  He offers you sleep aids, but you simply tell him his company is enough to put you at ease; while he, whether he likes to admit it or not, enjoys these moments with you, he finds himself nearly unable to breathe until he knows for certain you’re fast asleep on his office couch.  Your presence is nearly suffocating to him, but he just can’t seem to pull himself out of your orbit, no matter how hard he tries.

One evening, after the victory in Wano, you’re on your way to check on Luffy and Zoro, and bring a bento box to Chopper, who refused to leave their side.  You wave a cheerful goodbye to Usopp and Franky, sitting by a fire near the docks; Law nearly lets you walk away, content to simply catch a glimpse of you, but he is ultimately unable to resist the urge to catch up with you and join you on your walk.

“It’s getting dark.  I’ll walk with you.” he says, his tone not giving you much of an option to refuse, though he hopes you wouldn’t, if he gave you the choice.

Neither of you ones for idle small talk, you both cover a wide range of topics, from comparing types animals you’ve both dissected, to your varying experience of both having doctors for parents, which spills over into sharing some of your favorite childhood memories.  Law’s stomach flutters, unnerved by the way you get him to open up so easily, especially by your ability to coax him to delve into the good parts of his past that were so few and far between, but he finds himself once again succumbing to the overwhelming urge to be close to you.

When you reach the castle, he stays outside and waits for you, trying desperately to regain his composure and cursing himself for going after you in the first place when he knows he is playing with fire.

“Payment.” you say playfully on your way back to the docks as you drop a small drawstring bag of coins in his hand, a sly grin across your face, “For safe passage across the River Styx.”

He examined the commemorative coins plastered with Big Mom’s image as the two of you continued to walk; you must have gotten one of your crewmates to keep an eye out for them on their journey to retrieve Sanji.  A deep pain pulls at his heart when it sets in that you had asked your friends to go out of their way to bring back trinkets for him.

Law is speechless, but you simply smile, amused at the brief drop in his walls that was written all over his face.  “Fitting for the man who defeated Big Mom.” you say, poking him in the arm.

“I had plenty of help.” he says, trying to fight the blush spreading on his cheeks.

“I know,” you say with a smirk, “but I don’t care for Jaggy.”  Law lets out a chuckle at you using one of Luffy’s nicknames—he picked up a long time ago that, like your Captain, you’ll use them for people you don’t think much of, and is grateful that he’s more than Traffy to you.

Some sly, teasing remark inquiring if you care for him is on the tip of his tongue, but it gets stamped out by the rational part of his brain that reminds him you’ll be parting ways in a few days, likely to never see each other again.

“Me neither.” he says, hoping you didn’t notice his brief hesitation before he spoke.

He had returned you to his destination, but both of you were frozen, staring at each other and choking down a multitude of unspoken feelings.

“I’ve got something for you as well.” he finally says, breaking the silence, placing a small, white square in your hand—a piece of his vivre card.

“Don’t read too much into it.” he warns, pulling the brim of his cap over his eyes, knowing he’ll turn too soft if he can see the gratitude brimming in your gaze.

“Thank you, Law.” you say, squeezing his hand; your tone of voice tells him that you indeed had read too far into it, and were treating it as the cowardly confession that it was. 

Tilting his hat upward to get a good glimpse of his face, you glance around to make sure no one was watching before pressing your lips to his cheek.  Wordlessly, you reach into your pocket, tear a piece off of your own vivre card, and place it in his palm, covering it with yours.  A mutual, silent, bittersweet understanding hung in the air—there was no way this could happen now, but you both agree to keep a shred of hope for someday.

As you walk back to the Sunny, he finds himself calling your name—only your name, no -ya tagged on the end.

“Take care of yourself.” he says, heart melting at the smile you give him in return.

“You too, Law.” you reply, waving goodbye to him as you disappear up the ramp of the Sunny and out of sight.

And when he’s dizzy, bleeding out, and being carried through the cold ocean currents by Bepo, he allows himself, if only for a second, to wonder if you’re watching the scrap of his vivre card burn up in your palm.

[evermorehoon]

❣︎ ⎯⎯ reshaping reality

idol pairing: jake x reader

wc: 2.3k

genre: angst, fluff!

warnings: memory loss, separation, some crying of course, unintentionally recreating a meet cute, happy ending!

A/N: well say hello to my comeback work! idk I felt bad about the first one so I made this one to compensate and give y/n a happy ending. seeing as I did write this quite quickly, it might not be good since im very rusty and my fluff is ass😭 but anyway, feedback and appreciation is appreciated in any form so enjoy♡

here's part one in case you wanna refresh your memory (unlike someone lmao)

It was difficult watching Jake slowly regain his memories from a distance. You wanted to be with him, help bring back old memories, maybe even dig up old feelings.

But it had been weeks now and no one wanted to overwhelm him, especially after learning about the deaths of his two best friends. He was inconsolable, his head aching horribly from the crying and struggling to piece things together.

You'd left a questionable impression on him, seeing as his only memory of you is you crying by his bedside and being thankful that he was alive. Who were you, why was my family looking at you so sadly, what are you to me?

“I wondered about this for a while now,” he said aloud to the two memorials in front of him. The pictures of his friends were propped prettily on the table, allowing him to speak as though they were listening to him.

“My family seems to know her but no one wants to tell me who she is. Do you guys know?”

Silence.

“Maybe she can help me remember some of the last few years..”

He was told that there was a chance he wouldn't recover his memories due to the extensive brain damage. His head hurt every time he tried to make himself remember something but flashes of your face would appear in his dreams. He knew you must've been important enough to constantly cross his mind. His next step was to find out why.

Sometimes you'd sit on the edge of your bed, staring at your wedding dress as it hung from the closet door. You would set it out and just look at it. It was a beautiful dress, not a speck of dust on it from how well you cared for it. You were skeptical of wearing it again as it took you back to the worst day of your life.

You knew you could never marry another, especially in this dress. Perhaps the universe was telling you that it wasn't meant to be. That you should slowly move on.

But you'd look down at the rose gold promise ring given to you by your then boyfriend for your one year anniversary together. The engagement ring felt too painful to wear and you never had the chance to even see the wedding ring.

Maybe he won't remember you again, but his heart might.

It had been several months since you'd last seen Jaeyun. He was slowly making up the last few years, having given up on trying to remember old memories he decided to just make new ones. Even if it meant leaving you out of the picture.

He had managed to relearn some of his degree without having to do it again. He was still the quick learner he'd always been but he was made to take it easy at work, his colleagues reintroducing themselves slowly so as to not overwhelm him.

“How was the wedding?”

Jake blinked in confusion when it came up in conversation with a few of his colleagues. He looked completely clueless, shrugging with a nervous chuckle.

“What wedding?”

The others exchanged confused glances as one scratched their head, the air suddenly growing thicker with silence.

“Seriously, guys. Who got married? Was it maybe Jaein? He seems pretty nice.”

It's clear his smile was genuine. And, judging by the look of pure curiosity in his eyes, he was never told that he was in an accident on his wedding day. He was always puzzled by the picture of him and another woman smiling on his desk.

The conversation had died down rather quickly as the others left him hanging, leaving him to return to his desk with a puzzled expression. He sat down with a click of his tongue before looking down at that picture once more.

It had been sitting there for months since he never had the heart to take it off his desk. Looking at it gave him a little warmth in his heart. It gave him a seemingly comforting yet rather unfamiliar feeling, like looking at the woman in the picture was all he was meant to look at.

Then the glimmer of the rose gold ring on his left hand caught his attention. He tilted his head, gently fiddling with it. Taking it off felt wrong as his finger felt empty without it.

“I have to find that girl…” He thought to himself, trying to find a good way to approach you.

According to you, you missed him and you were happy he was okay. You were also in a significant amount of tears, so you must've been very close to him.

But then he sighed. It had been months since he'd last seen you, who knew if you even wanted to meet up with him. He was the one who decided to remake memories instead of hurting his head trying to remember the past.

He couldn't seem to understand why his family didn't say anything about you. Perhaps they thought he would remember you considering how big of a part you played in his life.

But how would you react if he suddenly asked so many questions? About the ring, the picture on his desk, your reaction when you saw him? Perhaps you'd be a little too uncomfortable with his presence after he left you behind without thinking.

Then, he'd thought of an idea.

Meanwhile, for you, the last few months were just numb and depressing. You thought it was for the best, letting him move onto a different path and ensuring his happiness. You felt selfish in wanting to force him to remember you so you could go back to your old life.

However, you went back to work as normal even with a somber look in your eyes. The house you lived in didn't feel like a home anymore. You couldn't smell the delicious 2am ramen he would cook as a late-night snack for you two. The house was cold and lifeless without his warm aura and hearty laughter to fill the rooms.

You missed him terribly. You sometimes wanted to cry when you remembered that you would never wake up to his fluffy bed hair and sleepy expression or his sweet smile that could light the town.

But alas, you never thought you could experience it again. All love ever did was break and burn and end. At least, that's what you thought. You hoped and prayed that maybe he'll remember that you were meant to be.

Jake had moved back to his parents house as his family helped him in every way they could. He sometimes sat in his room, scrolling through his gallery, seeing you in so many pictures.

His heart swelled with warmth when he saw your smile. He chuckled when he saw videos of you two laughing together. How was he not with you right now? It's clear you two were in love, so why couldn't he bring himself to finally talk to you?

He seemed a little… afraid. Yes, afraid of what would happen. Just because you were lovers before the accident doesn't mean you still love him. Maybe his presence will interfere with your healing, maybe you've made peace with this and moved on.

But he'd never know unless he tried. So he gathered up the courage to think of something, some kind of way to ‘accidentally’ run into you.

And judging by one of the pictures in his gallery, he may know just the place.

The coffee shop. As cliché as it may be, you found solace in the atmosphere of a good coffee shop. It was a good environment to work in, all while having even more coffee than before. Your caffeine intake increased steadily over the past few weeks as it was the only thing that could calm you down these days.

Seated in the back of the café, your gaze fixed on your laptop with a cappuccino by your side as you typed. You mastered the ability to block out the world, not allowing your mind to wander because it would almost always make its way back to him.

“Are you using this?”

You froze almost instantaneously, your fingers slightly shaking from how quickly you stilled. That voice was familiar, you remember hearing that same sentence years ago.

It's when you look up, your heart sinks to the ground. There he stood right beside you.

His round glasses and coffee brown eyes, just how you remembered him. He looked like he hadn't aged a day as he looked like the same Sim Jaeyun you met in the university library all those years ago.

“What?” You asked softly, trying to confirm if all of this was real.

“The plug.” His voice sounded much more mature as he pointed to his laptop bag.

You didn't know whether he was intentionally recreating the day you first met or if he's still trying to jog his memory. His face was still uncertain so it was clear he didn't remember doing this before.

You shook your head, allowing him to sit opposite you and plug his laptop in. He couldn't seem to take his eyes off you, his heart felt warm and calm now that he was face to face with the woman he sees in his dreams and in his pictures.

“Is there something on my face?”

Your voice knocked him out of his thoughts as you asked softly. He shook his head, trying to play it off.

“Uh, no… you just look familiar..” he chuckled softly before looking down, realizing that it probably wasn't the best thing to say at that moment.

It was possibly the most awkward encounter you two have ever had. Neither could speak, focusing on typing some documents and whatnot. You would look up occasionally at him, noticing his little habits and knowing he never changed one bit. He still tapped his lips gently when he was thinking (one of his cutest habits in your opinion).

That was until you decided to speak up rather quietly and cautiously.

“Do you remember now?”

He looked up at you, unsure of what to say. He couldn't say he did, because he didn't. All he had was a feeling. A magnetic pull toward you that he couldn't avoid.

“No,” he said softly as he shook his head.

“What are you nervous about?”

“Nervous? I'm not nervous…”

“You fiddle with your ring when you're nervous.”

He looked down at his hands, unknowingly fiddling with his rose gold ring. He was slightly surprised by your observation, not knowing that you'd known him long enough to memorize his every habit.

The conversation died as quickly as it began, the two of you going back to working again. He could tell you seemed uneasy and uncertain. The last thing he wanted to do was to make you uncomfortable.

“Do you want me to go?” He asked. He didn't seem like he wanted to leave but, if he did, it would mean he'd leave forever.

You thought for a few seconds before speaking.

“I want to start over.”

There's that familiar warmth in Jake's heart every time he sees you in the café. You greeted him with a warm smile, now on your second meeting.

You had somehow agreed to completely wipe the slate clean. You thought to yourself that you would never know if he still loved you unless you went through everything all over again. Life had given you a reset button, and who were you to deny it?

Sure you would grow a little impatient here and there but you constantly reminded yourself that you're taking it easy for his sake. To him, you're a familiar stranger even though he's the love of your life. You pretended to learn about habits and hobbies and interests you already knew.

It felt like you were falling in love again. He was just as beautiful, funny, and smart as he was when you first dated. His hangouts were just as sweet as before.

You watched him with fondness in your eyes as he'd cover his mouth with one hand while he laughed. His adorable laughter rang through your ears like a soothing tune.

The hangouts turned into weeks of courting and into months of dating.

Everyone was thrilled to know you two were back together again. But the uncertainty of whether he wanted to marry you or not still hung over your head. He seemed to have given up on remembering, making a scrapbook of new memories of you two.

And just when you thought it couldn't get any better, he proposed once more. He'd gotten a new ring to replace the one that haunted you at times. He'd moved back in with you, filling the house with his radiant warmth and turning it into a home once more.

Time went by so quickly that you couldn't believe you were back in the same position as a few years ago. Standing in a white dress with a bouquet of origami orange flowers, which Jake picked and hand-made.

Walking down the aisle and clutching onto your bouquet, it all felt like a dream. Your future husband waiting for you at the altar with the biggest smile on his face, surrounded by the people you love most. Everything was finally coming true, all because you took the chance to let it all begin again.

I feel like the ending is a little rushed I am so sorry😭😭

[fuyuu-chan]

Your Smile Is The Only Thing I Would Love To See

Pairing: Neuvillette x Reader

Sypnosis: You never saw Neuvillette smile until...

Genre: Fluff

Fuyuu-chan: Just bored so I made this, I hope y'all enjoy 🫶

Warning: Not proofread

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You've been friends with Neuvillette for a while and never did he smiled at you but you're okay with that as long as his comfortable around you.

But of course over time you and Neuvillette became closer and closer to the point he slowly started opening up to you.

And one time you visited his office in Palais Mermonia, it's been raining for a while but you came over because it's the day where you two spend time together but what greets you as you entered his office is him crying silently.

You rushed towards him and put your hands on top of his hand as you said "Why are you crying Neuvillette?"

He looked up as he saw you looking at him worriedly.

"Ah (name) you're here..." He said as he looked away.

You cupped his cheek to turn his face to face you as you brush away his tears using your thumb "Yes I am here, now can you tell me why are you crying?" You said softly.

He calmed himself first but it still rains outside and after a few minutes he told you the reason of his troubles and you listened to him.

After telling everything to you, you smiled at him for comfort. "I understand what you feel Neuvillette, I've been there before, but if I overcome it don't you think you can do the same? Besides you're strong and if you can't do it alone don't worry as I will always be by your side to help you"

He looks at you as you say that as he smiled at you. "Thank you (name)"

You got startled as he smiled at you for the first time but regained your composure back "Your Welcome... And your smile is beautiful, you should smile more often it suits you"

He looked away a little as he coughed a bit because he felt a bit embarrassed. "Thank you... But why do you look so happy when I smiled?"

You chuckled.

"It's because it's you, it's natural to be happy when you see someone smile especially when you're the reason they did, but most of all it's because your smile is the only thing I would love to see" you smiled gently as you said that.

Neuvillette's eyes widen as he heard you said that.

"I would love to see it more often" you continued as you shyly smiled.

He looked at you as he smiled again "Alright then"

You both then smiled at each other as the rain slowly stopped and a rainbow begin to appear outside.

Finally you saw him smile this is definitely a memory to treasure or are you going overboard? You know what it doesn't matter cause for you this is important and you will be forever happy to see him smile more often. To see the person important to you smile and happy (especially if you're the reason for that and in this case you are and for future as well ;) ) is enough for you to live happily.

ฅ⁠^⁠•⁠ﻌ⁠•⁠^⁠ฅ

Please do not copy, translate, repost to any other social media

[bonefall]

Looking for advice since you're great with stuff like this: I'm struggling with how to have a character fundamentally change. A character in my cat story loses his memory and ends up working with the main characters to stop his own plan he made to destroy the world (and after the plan is stopped, he regains his memories). I want his time in the Starless to change him, make him less obsessed with power, but I'm really starting to struggle with whether or not that makes sense and how to work that.

Hmm.. well, first bit of advice I always give is that characters are not people. They are writing tools. That doesn't mean they shouldn't be "realistic" or that connecting to the human traits in the audience isn't important.

It means that a character exists to tell a story.

By "tool" I mean "machine." Every trait is a piston, and ideally they work together to drive your story along. What are you saying with each trait? What is your beginning point for the story, and their end? What do you want to explore? What do you want the audience to take away?

So if you feel stuck on a character, find the larger message you want to impart with them. The job they're doing in your narrative.

What do you want to say about power?

What do you want to say about why Character X wanted to destroy the world? Why was he wrong? What feelings and information lead him to that conclusion?

What is his redemption arc doing for your themes?

Every writer answers those questions differently. For example, I feel strongly that power doesn't corrupt, it reveals. When you finally have the influence to make others do what you want, you make them do it. I don't see "power" as being like... a magic, abstract thing, it's influence over other people, and those people are ALSO individuals with their own reasons for following the leader.

Digressing; what I'm getting at is that, as a writer, I have a lot of thoughts on power itself. I got this way with a lot of reading and interest on the topic. You might find it insightful to experience more art, essays, and commentary on the subject, if you ever get stuck, and develop an opinion you feel strongly about.

Not just about power, as broad writing advice.

Anyway.

If I was writing the character, these are the things I'd be thinking about specifically and changes I'd be making on personal taste. I don't know your full story enough so, hopefully it's insightful;

First of all I'm always SUPER wary of the "correct but demonized radical" trope. Does my villain have a point?

Am i just giving them a Kick-a-Baby scene to make them wrong when they should be completely right otherwise

What are my themes and tone? This is VERY important. Steven Universe is about family and emotions with low stakes violence; the Diamonds are essentially abusive grandparents that Steven is coaching through intergenerational trauma. They fit the universe they're in. Jack Horner does not belong in SU.

So I'd look at Character X's purpose.

Knowing me, I'd actually take out full amnesia entirely. I have memory problems related to trauma so I'm a lot more familiar with major, important details blotting out RIGHT when I need them. Enough that I can put myself in the shoes of someone like BB!Fallenleaf who remembers a lot but the details are fuzzy.

So personally I think I could write this villan to be VERY funny lmao

"Hello. I am Gnagnathor the Destroyer."

"No you're not. He has three horns. You have two."

(DID I USED TO HAVE THREE HORNS?????)

I also just find it more resonant when a character still remembers what they did, why they did it, and is able to refute themselves with their own growth.

To me like... when a character remembers NOTHING to the point where they're not informed by their actions or history at all, how are they really still the same person?

in general though I find total amnesia uninteresting. I wish it was less popular.

What did Gnagnathor DO with his power? What did he WANT from it?

The simplest version of this I know is "Gnag was hurting and wanted everyone else to hurt too. Now that he has a happy place, he doesn't want that."

TO BE CLEAR THATS FINE. That's a REALLY common power fantasy and it's not automatically a bad story. It's popular for a reason.

Personally I feel strongly about the idea, though, that people with power don't change unless they lose it. There's no reason to.

People don't change until you break the environment that contributes to the behavior.

Especially with victims unfortunately-- the ugly truth is that a lot of problematic behaviors exist because they protected the victim from their abuser's actions. You need safety to really start to unpack that.

You can personally identify it and address it as much as you want, when your abuser starts to use That Tone you will still seize up. Just try to yank yourself back into your head when you're disassociating during a screaming session; your reward is raw distress.

That said, not all villains HAVE to have tragic motivators like that, or be ex-victims at all. Leveraging power to get what you want can be as ugly as just being taught the people you're hurting are subhuman.

Or making up justifications for why This Is a Good Thing Actually.

Some people will lash out violently when these justifications fall apart, because accepting it would mean they're Being Bad

Most people have an innate desire to Be Good. Like... the vast, vast majority of people. Some sense of morality is observable in all intelligent social animals; dolphins, chimps, elephants.

Tangentially, if you understand that people don't WANT to be bad and that the natural response to a scolding is defensiveness, you understand that convincing people of something is a LOT easier when you approach with kindness.

AND IN TURN: be wary of those who are flattering while trying to convince you of something. This is Manipulation 101.

So back to Gnagnathor

Do I want to talk about environment and how it changes him to be away from power? How traits that previously earned him wealth or influence are suddenly incredibly taboo, so he can't use them here?

On that-- HOW did he get his power in the first place? Re: I'm very wary of the "correct but demonized radical" trope.

Were his minions following him because they have serious issues and he exploited their desperation? .....are you centering the experience of the poor, sad abuser over his victims

Or are they ALL united over something important and legitimate? With the redemption of their villainous leader, how are you planning for that to frame all of their former followers?

(This is why redeeming minions is usually a lot more productive than doing it to the leader, imo. Redeeming Zuko means you can explore the familial legacy, the indoctrination of the Fire Nation's children, their justifications, the way systems make monsters out of people. Redeeming The Firelord would probably have caused Azula, one of his victims, to pick up his slack and now, suddenly, you have a VERY uncomfortable situation where Ozai is thrashing one of his abused children but Good This Time.)

(Not to mention that, again... why would he do this. He has power. He's doing what he wants and is used to this situation. It would be a numbskulled narrative choice.)

Aaaand that's about all I can say without essentially being a cowriter or editor. It's on you to figure out what you're trying to do and say here. I'm a good writer on this subject because I think about it a lot, which has lead to my strong opinions and point of view. Your art is a reflection of you.

[pepsiluvr0209]

White Ferrari (Final)

buckle in guys

WARNINGS: Angst, mentions of death and just overall sadness

Matt Sturniolo x Reader

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"I let you out, at Central."

It had been one day.

One day of Matt never leaving your side. He practically had to be dragged out of your room for tests and to rest, since the lack of sleep the boy was getting was detrimental for his healing.

"Baby you need to eat." You look at Matt who stared back at you, sadness engulfing his eyes. He had been by your hospital bed for the past couple hours and you started to get concerned.

"I don't want to." He mumbled, tiredly grabbing your tubed hand and playing with your fingers. "I just want to be with you."

"Can you eat here?" Matt just shrugged. Just then you started coughing erratically and Matt jumped up, cradling you gently so you could stabilise yourself. After your breathing evened out, he reluctantly let go and instantly latches himself back onto your hand. This happens about once every 10 minutes and Matt feels his heart break with every episode.

"See this is what we can't do." You sternly say turning to look at him in the eyes. "I want you to take care of yourself."

Matt fiercely shakes his head and you can feel his larger hands start to tremor in yours. "I don't need to take care of myself." He says quietly looking down. "Because when we get out of here, I-I'll have you." He says with confidence.

You've experienced a couple heartbreaks in your time but nothing could compare to the pain you felt in that very moment.

"Matt-" You start.

"No. I don't want to hear it."

If you look close enough you can glistening streams flowing from his ocean eyes down his pale cheeks. You reach out to run your fingers over his stubble which was poking out since he hasn't had the opportunity to shave in a while. Matt's hand still interlaced with yours, he watches you as your intertwined hands caress over his face. You watch back staring at him with a bittersweet smile.

"I love you."

"I love you more." And he reached over to plant a gentle kiss on your lips.

Now, you weren't stupid. As soon as you regained consciousness the Doctor's gave it to you straight, and of course you were destroyed to find out that there was nothing they could do.

But what upset you the most was Matt.

We had everything planned out and it's all going to shit, because I can't physically be there with him. Create more memories with him. We're never going to go on 2am drives together again, never going to play fucking Mariokart with him again, and do stupid little things like shared face-masks, long hugs and deep talks, movie marathons and cooking monstrosities in the kitchen.

But he will do it with someone else.

He can marry another girl, and have kids, live right by Nick and Chris and go to Central with her.

While I'll watch and always know that it could've been me.

Maybe in another life.

The Doctor's told me it was a guy driving a white Ferrari. Had too much to drink and paid the consequences for it. They're burying him the day before my funeral.

It's such a weird thought. My funeral's in a couple days. Would I have scarring from all these wires? Would I be wearing my hospital gown? Who would show up?

Would Matt be there?

Would it be sad? Fuck, would they serve food after?

A guy came in for my will the other day and I told him all of my stuff me and Matt basically shared so he can decide what to do with everything. Obviously I gave my parents and Matt's brothers a respectful amount, but honestly I could care less, my stuff isn't as important compared to him.

"What are you thinking about sweetheart?" Matt gently moved my stray hairs from my forehead to the side.

"Nothing." I smile. He smiles back, and I can tell he knows I'm lying but he is perfectly fine living right now, without knowing.

I inhale sharply. "Matt?" He hums in response, sensing my hesitation. "How fast are you gonna move on?"

"I don't want to talk about that y/n." He says sternly.

"Why?" I retaliate, my brows furrowing. When he doesn't answer I huff and say quietly. "I've got just over 24 hours left Matt. I-It hurts to cough and sometimes I throw up blood-"

"No, no, no, no." He says loudly. "You're gonna make it baby. T-The Doctor's, they don't know jackshit okay. I-I- You can do this, I kno-"

"Matt... it's okay."

"No, its not." He sobs. "How could you leave me. It's not fair." He cries into my bed. "It's not fair, it's not fair. It should've been me."

"Shh, no it shouldn't have."

Matt hiccups. "Y-Y-es."

You feel hopeless, all you can do is stroke his hair and reassure him that it's going to be okay, when you both know damn well your not telling the truth.

Once Matt had calmed down, he rested his head on your bed, right next to your bandaged shins. Both of you were holding hands, his thumb stroking yours. You both were just staring at each other, no words to convey the amount of love both of you were pouring out of your tired eyes.

Suddenly Matt quietly speaks up, drifting his eyes from yours and onto the crisp white bedsheets. "I don't think I'll ever be able to move on from you." He mumbles. "I-I just... You were with me through everything. I can't comprehend how you're not going to be here one day, a-and it scares me that when you are gone-" He tremors again and you just hold his hand tighter. "That I won't know what the point of everything is without you. You're my everything a-and you're just gonna leave me." He starts crying. "I don't want you to leave."

"I don't want to leave either Matt. I don't- I don't want to die." You cry with him. Everything hitting you all at once.

Eventually you both fell asleep and when you woke up medics were by your side. You glance at Matt's sleeping figure then around to look at everyone. "It hurts."

A nurse crouches down to face you. "We're going to give you painkillers, so when you pass it doesn't hurt as much."

You nod, and you can feel tears falling down your face. "Okay." This was real. It was happening. "H-How long do I have left... To live?"

The nurse looks at you sympathetically. "Judging by your vitals we estimate a couple hours." She reaches out and caresses your hair. "It'll just be like falling asleep. In the meantime we'll all leave and I'm going to unhook you to some of these machines, so you can at least be more comfortable."

You can only nod. Your whole body is flooded with pain and you realise that this is it.

You're going to die.

You can feel Matt stirring, just as the nurse unhooks you off the last machine, and everyone leaves.

"W-what's going on?" All of a sudden he's alert and checking his surroundings.

All you can do is softly smile at him and try your best not to burst into tears.

"Matt." You manage out. "It's happening."

Matt swore his whole world fell out of place. You continued. "They um- They gave me pain medication so I won't feel it and the-the nurse said it's like falling asleep."

"How long?" Matt felt like he didn't even recognise his own voice.

"A couple hours."

Matt gulped, but it felt like he swallowed a rock. "So what are you going to do?"

"Lie with me... please?"

Matt didn't even feel the rough scratch of your sheets or heard the creak of the bed. Facing you he said, "I can't even process this."

"So don't."

He just nodded and went down under the covers further. "Can I please hold you?... Just one last time."

It took everything in you not to start sobbing right there. "Yes Matt. You can."

So he gently took your body and moved it towards him, cradling you into him and holding you like if he lets go you would leave. Because you just might.

He was gonna miss you.

God, he was gonna miss you so much.

After an hour you spoke up.

"What were we going to do if we got to Central."

Matt looked down at you and smiled. "Well, last time I went I saw the prettiest bookstore ever and I instantly thought of you, so I figured that would've been our first stop. And of course, knowing you that would eat up a couple hours."

You laughed a bit, which made tears form in Matt's eyes. He's never going to hear that again.

"And then what?"

Matt sniffed. "And then I made a dinner reservation."

Your eyes gently shut and your heart rate slowed.

"Best carbonara in town. So naturally I had to take you there. Uh- It was an outside booking, and already a nice day, so I thought you would've loved it."

"Mhm, keep going." Snuggling into his warm chest, trying to ignore the pain shooting through you at a rapid pace.

"And then there was this park." He said softly. "Big open area, moonlit pond... fairy lights."

You smiled into his chest, the pain becoming numb as you felt it slowly encase you. "That sounds beautiful."

"It is, you would've loved it. They have little paths where you can walk around." You felt your pulse slowly fade. "And when we would get to a spot, I would hold you and tell you that I love you. And that I want to spend the rest of my life with you. That your all that matters to me. I would list every little thing I love about you. Your hair, your eyes, your joy and how much you make my life better. You know why sweetheart? Because I love you. I love you so much okay? So whenever you feel like you have to let go, just know that I love you and that I will always love you, forever and ever and ever......"

"Y/n?"

"Sweetheart, are you awake?"

"Y/n? Oh my god, no, please."

"Y/n please wake up. Please."

"No, not yet."

"Not yet."

"Don't leave me."

"I love you."

ₓ˚. ୭ ˚○◦˚.˚◦○˚ ୧.˚ₓ

Rain was pouring down heavily, as Matt got out of the car, double checking to see if he missed anything.

Matt felt heavy as he stepped along the gravel path, trudging towards the place where he spent most of his time.

He gently sat down next to you, ignoring the uncomfortable wet soil. Staring at you Matt remembered one of the things he bought and held it up to you. "I got you more flowers." He softly smiled. "I know your probably sick of them by now but they were half off so, you know."

Sighing he plucked at the grass in front of him. "Not much has happened. Except, you know Alisha? From my management team. I told you about her a couple weeks ago. She's new. Anyways, she-uh... She asked me out on a date. A-and I told her I'd think about it. She's great but... she's nothing like you." He mumbled. "I don't think anyone's ever going to be like you."

There was a brief silence until he spoke up again.

"Do you remember when I told you I'd never move on from you. I-It's true. Nothing can ever compare to you... But I know, for reasons I'd never understand, you would've wanted me to move on. So I thought I'd do this as um... closure? Just in case, but one of my biggest regrets is never doing this sooner because I was too scared." He lightly chuckled.

Matt stood up and reached into his pocket, suddenly feeling nervous.

"At Central." He whispered just so you could hear. "After the dinner and after we would explore the park and find the spot. And I was gonna tell you how much you mean to me and how I want to spend the rest of my life with you." Matt slowly pulled out a small box from his front pocket. "And then I was gonna get down on one knee and ask you to marry me." He whispered. Matt opened the box and gently placed it on the soil, littered with flowers he got you.

"I hope you would've said yes."

He stood in front of your grave.

"Goodbye, sweetheart."

ₓ˚. ୭ ˚○◦˚.˚◦○˚ ୧.˚ₓ

"If you think about it, it'll be over in no time

And that's life."

WHEW

No bc I sobbed so hard writing this like goddamn

Shoutout to whoever said to put this out or they'd touch me wtf😃

But you guys rlly loved part 1 so here is your finale <3

Stay tuned see ya

[taestefully-in-luv]

Our Time | JJK (Three)

Summary: After an accident and being in a coma for three months, you finally wake. But the last nine years of your life have been completely erased. You rely on none other than your best friend, Jungkook, to help regain your memories and yourself. But what happens when the truth of your missing time starts unraveling and it isn’t all it’s made out to be?

Pairing: Jungkook x Fem Reader (Detective!Jk x Graphic Designer!OC) side pairing: Seokjin x Reader

Genre: crime au, fluff, heavy angst, smut, romance, darker themes, amnesia au. Best friends to ???

Word Count: 12.8k

Warnings: swearing, frustrations of amnesia, mentions of sex dream, mentions of alcohol

a/n: an important chapter 🤭 please let me know what you think! Send an ask if you want to be added to the taglist or just want to chat :]

© taestefully-in-luv

Previous --- Next

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You are aware that everyone has something like a telltale tic that gives them away when they lie. Body language speaks louder than we think. Whole conversations happen with just the body alone. Arguments, comfort, affection, sex and even a fist to the face. The body speaks even when our mouths refuse. 

You’ve been told all your life that when you lie you always avoid eye contact and shrug awkwardly. Even with knowing that information, you still do it. Because your body speaks for you. Just like how you’ve told Jungkook for years that when he lies he always, without realization, touches or tugs at the skin of his neck while he speaks. His body moves on its own to speak without him having to do it himself. 

Of course there are times you don’t catch it. Heat of the moment, you can’t always observe every little detail and pick up on someone’s body language. But there are times when you do.

Jungkook has been quiet with you since he practically dragged you out of his apartment. No matter how gently he pulled you away from that place, you know when you’re not welcomed somewhere. The drive to your house is only five minutes—if that—but it feels like an eternity of dreaded silence. But his body is speaking. And it’s asking you not to ask any questions. 

It’s too bad that don’t have the patience for that. 

Having patience has never been a trait you’ve had and you doubt that’s changed in nine years either. 

“Jungkook.” You say his name as softly as you can but he still flinches, knuckles turning white from his grip on the steering wheel.

He lightly clears his throat before glancing your way, though his eyes never meet yours. “What’s up?” 

“Do you…” You keep your gaze on him, determined to get at least some answers to what you just saw. “Do you really live there?”

Jungkook’s grip stays the same, his body not tensing more nor tensing less. He expected this question. He keeps his eyes on the road as he answers you, “Yeah.” 

Truth.

“Oh.” You nod slowly, his answer almost throwing you off guard. You didn’t really plan what to say if he answered with ‘yes’. “I’m surprised.” You say honestly, “It barely looks lived in.” 

You watch Jungkook carefully but he stays the same. Tense, expectant, worried. 

You keep going, “Ah, but you are mostly having meals with me at my house so I guess that makes sense. You’re more at my place than yours, huh?” You tilt your head cutely, giving him the indication that you’re trying to lighten the mood and make him more comfortable. 

It works. Your eyes go to his hands and you see how his grip loosens and he’s nodding his head, though it looks hesitant. “Yeah, exactly.” He tells you but his eyes stay on the road still.

You nod, smile appearing on your face. “Exactly.” You repeat. 

He relaxes more as he turns into your neighborhood and he finally glances at you, eyes on yours for the first time since the apartment and he actually gives you a timid smile. 

You’ll take it. For now. But your curiosity is only growing. You know so much is being kept from you and it feels deeper than you first assumed. Jungkook is proving that. You have questions but you’ll have to be smart about how to get your answers.

“Hey,” You start conversation again, gently speaking once more and thankfully, Jungkook doesn’t flinch this time. He only turns his head to look at you for a second, raising his brows before his eyes go back to the road ahead. “Why don’t we still go to the park for ice cream?”

“Oh?” He looks a little surprised. You wonder if he’s surprised because you’re letting this entire apartment thing go. “You want to?”

“Mhm.” You lean back in the seat, legs stretching in front of you. “I read doing as many things as possible could help with this amnesia thing.” You didn’t actually read that but it sounds believable. “Let’s go or what?” You just want him to relax and smile again. 

Jungkook is quiet for a moment, his teeth lazily chewing his lips before he nods. “Yeah, that sounds good.” And then he releases a long breath and you swear you can see his nerves releasing as well. 

You study him for a moment longer, mind whirling in questions and assumptions. But you won’t allow yourself to come to any conclusions.

Not yet.

~

“I can’t believe I’m not friends with Jaewon anymore. I really thought we would be tight forever.” You say right before licking your double scoop ice cream. “Did we have a falling out?”

Jungkook chuckles, “Not at all. He got a girlfriend, moved to France and I think he’s been married for a while. I know they have two kids together.”

“Jaewon has children?!” You look at Jungkook, expressing your disbelief. “I remember when he and I went around looking for these adorable stickers that came with some snack to finish his impressive collection and,” You pause to lick your ice cream again. “He found only one cake left at the same time as these two kids. They were clearly wanting the stickers too. So I said, ‘hey why don’t we just give it to them?’ you know, because they’re just little kids. But he looked me dead in the eye and said ‘fuck them kids.’ And now he’s a father.” You snort, “Truly amazing.”

Jungkook laughs with you, “Isn’t it?”

“I’ll have to stalk him on Instagram when I remember.” You say while mindlessly licking your ice cream again before you remember another old friend. “What about Seri? Are we still friends with her?”

“Seri?” Jungkook tries to hide a peculiar smile. “Were you ever really friends with her?”

“I mean, kind of?” You shrug. “I’m guessing we aren’t close then?”

“y/n,” Jungkook hides his teasing smile behind his ice cream cone. “You never liked her.”

“What? Yes I do. She just annoyed me sometimes.” You quietly huff out, looking defensive.

“Why is that?”

“You know why,” You roll your eyes, bumping into his side. “Sometimes she took her crush on you too far. Like, it’s cool that she likes you—well, liked—but sometimes she made it her entire personality.”

“Uh huh.”

“I’m serious! She is great other than that.”

“Uh huh.”

“Okay, wouldn’t you get annoyed too? I remember one time I was sick and instead of asking me if I was okay she asked if you were free to hang out then?!” 

Jungkook laughs at this, head thrown back before he shakes it. “That’s hilarious.”

“Sure.” You look displeased. “She has other good qualities though.” 

“Oh, y/n, y/n, y/n.” Jungkook puts a hand on your shoulder and he spills a little secret. “It’s okay, you don’t need to pretend. One time you admitted to me how you truly feel about her.”

You stop walking and he stops too, blinking at him in surprise. “I did?”

“Mhm,” He drops his hand and starts walking again, urging you to follow. “Years ago.”

“Oh.” You nod your head, feet moving again. “In that case, yeah, she also chewed with her mouth open all the freaking time. She talked way too much during movies and not to mention, she tried hooking me up with her brother! And we all knew he was trash.”

“Wait, Seri tried hooking you up with her brother?! He is literally in jail now.” Jungkook looks peeved, “You never told me that. Why didn’t you tell me that?”

“I don’t know.” You shrug. “I think I planned on it. But wait, why is he in jail?”

“He’s a fucking creep.” Jungkook says, annoyed. “He paid for prostitution, got mixed up in drugs…honestly, the list goes on.” 

“Well, not surprised.” 

“None of us were.” Jungkook agrees, “But anyway, back to Seri.”

“You know she told me that you two made out at Misuk’s 22nd birthday party. I always meant to ask you about it.” You mention this as easygoing as possible. “So did you guys? If so, you definitely made her dreams come—”

“—You definitely did ask me about this,” Jungkook cuts you off, his tone is lighthearted. “Much later, but yeah, you asked.”

“Oh.”

He glances at you and smiles, “I was never interested in Seri. You know me, I didn’t hook up with anyone I wasn’t seriously interested in.”

“I guess.” Your eyes trail across the park, landing on a pond nearby. “Oh! Let’s go over there.” You point at the small body of water before continuing your conversation, “Anyway, what’s Seri up to now?”

“No clue. I don’t follow her on anything.” He hums, “But do you remember her friend Mijoo?”

“Mijoo…wait, the girl who was dating the guy that Subin is into? Wait, I mean was into since she clearly isn’t anymore. You know, with a whole marriage coming up.” 

“Yeah!” Jungkook’s fingers wrap around your wrist to lead you to the pond, “You like this side of the pond better.” He tells you as he guides to the other side where some trees are. “Anyway, Mijoo ended up marrying that guy. But the point is, she works at the company you work at. You two aren’t close but I think you were acquaintances before you started working from home.”

“Oh.” You nod in understanding, “That’s cool!”

Jungkook is offering information about your life. Maybe because he believes it’s harmless.

You two stroll through tall grass that sways left to right, completely abandoning the concrete path. The sun is setting now, the sky a mix of pinks and purples while the sun is a deep, glowing orange. You and Jungkook finish off your ice creams before getting closer to the water.

“It’s pretty, right?” Jungkook stares out over the calm water. “We can see the sun set here.”

“Do we come here often? It kind of feels familiar.” You admit to him, heart picking up but you can’t place why.

Jungkook doesn’t tear his eyes off the sky or the water, his mind figuring out an answer when he settles for, “Sometimes.”

Truth.

“Do you…” You focus on the feeling in your chest. You can’t tell if it’s discomfort or if it just feels unknown. “Do you like it here?” You ask, voice quieter than before. You aren’t sure why you even asked that, really.

Jungkook’s chest stops moving. Like he is suddenly holding his breath and it doesn’t go unseen by you. “I don’t know.” He finally answers. Tongue pushing against his cheek and you know, like usual, it means he doesn’t intend to elaborate. 

“Then—”

Suddenly, Jungkook chuckles to himself. “—By the way, when you were like 27 you got us kicked out of a bar.”

“Huh?” You stare at him, his eyes still on the water. “Why did I get us kicked out?” And why is he bringing it up?

“Some random guy tried to fight me.” He shrugs like it’s no big deal. “I didn’t even notice that he had beef with me. Anyway, you noticed.” He cracks a smile. “And you tried to fight him in my honor or something.”

You stare at him, bewildered. “No way.”

“I’m serious,” He turns his head to face you, big smile growing on his lips. “You hated the way he talked to me, I guess. And before I knew it you were pushing him and claiming he was going to hit me.” He starts cracking up. “I had no idea, seriously.”

“Wow, I am so cool.” You nod subtly, “Best friend of the century.”

Jungkook’s smile goes from big and wide to soft and shy. “You are.” Then he rolls his eyes. “But the guy was friends with the staff so they kicked us out instead of him.”

“Of course.” You roll your eyes too, giggling. 

You realize he isn’t just telling you things he believes would be harmless. No, that’s not it. He’s telling you things to compensate for the fact he’s not really telling you anything. He’s feeding you stories to distract from his own story. The one you’re more curious about and you know he knows that.

You both share a moment looking out at the pond. Water as calm and still as can be. The complete opposite of whatever is going on with your heart. There’s something about this place that feels so familiar but you can’t place it and it drives you crazy.

You only see the top half of the sun now, the bottom half dipped into the horizon and the sky is lacking as many colors as a dark and deep blue starts taking over and a few stars start to shine.

“This looks like the perfect place to share secrets.” The words spill mindlessly from your mouth before you feel your entire body go as still as the water. 

‘Doesn’t this place make you want to share secrets?’ ‘Oh? What secret should I share with you?’ ‘Something juicy.’ ‘How about the first time I—’ 

“y/n?” Jungkook’s voice interrupts your thoughts. “y/n…” His hand comes to your shoulder and you feel his worried gaze on you. But you can’t focus on that.

You’re trying to focus on breathing again.

What was that?

Sunset. Another sunset. Water. Ducks. Rain. Sunshine. You. Jungkook. Tree. 

You try to make sense of what you’re seeing in your head. The voices. Your voice. Jungkook’s voice. You and him. Here. 

You stare at the water, blinking fast now as you try to make sense of the images in your head. Suddenly, you’re breathing. But you’re breathing too much.

“Hey,” Jungkook steps in front of you, both hands on your shoulders. You find his eyes and you find comfort immediately. 

Was that your imagination? Did you remember something? Did you brain make that up? You swear that felt real…felt like it’s happened.

“J-Jungkook.” You feel the panic set in. Your lips tingle and your hands are growing sweaty. “I think I kind of…” You pause, mouth going so dry it feels impossible to speak. You urge yourself to calm down but you only feel anxious. This feels new—brand new—unknown and scary. 

“Hey, hey.” Jungkook rubs his fingers into your shoulders, “Okay, it’s okay.” He remains calm, his voice smooth and steady but the concern is evident in his eyes. “I’m here.”

You nod your head quickly, trying to let him know you understand but you feel lightheaded. “Please hug me.” You request almost silently. “Plea—”

Jungkook brings you close to him, your body melting against his. You inhale him as you breathe and his scent automatically gives you a sense of comfort but almost instantly it feels like ten different images start shooting through your brain. All hugs with Jungkook. All ten images are different scenarios of Jungkook’s arms wrapped around you. Even some you recognize…like the hug he gave you the day he thanked you for coming to his police academy graduation. And one hug you don’t recognize at all.

Overwhelmed, you push Jungkook away.

“Sorry, I just…” You mumble, eyes darting around the park. “I think I know this place.”

Jungkook tries his hardest not to frown but he does. “You’ve been here a lot.” He says, almost nervously. “I thought it would be a place to…” He stops, eyes falling to his empty hands. “There’s a lot of memories here so I thought—”

“—Are some of those memories not good?” You ask him, trying to keep your voice calm.

“Not every memory that lives lost in your head is a good one.” He says, his voice just as calm. “But I am here with you for every single one.” He lifts his eyes back to you. “I promise.”

For the first time, you don’t want to avoid a memory because it could be overwhelming. You’re suddenly wanting to stay away because you’re starting to gather that not everything is rainbows and sunshine. Not just your life but other’s lives as well. Your best friend for instance.

“Hey,” Jungkook walks closer to you again, his hands finding your hands. His fingers playing with your fingers and the touch feels like how you yearn for. You don’t remember it ever feeling this way. “I didn’t mean to scare you.” He says quietly, his voice only for you. “There are so many good things running around in your brain and I can’t wait for you to know them.”

You might be curious about a million things right now. But 24 year old you, with a huge crush on this man before you, has something else to be curious about.

What exactly is your relationship with Jeon Jungkook? Because this feels like something you know, you just don’t know it yet.

~

You know it has to be around 9pm by now. The sun has long set and the night sky is dark and cloudy but it feels nice. Jungkook parks in front of your house and you know his intention is to just drop you off because he doesn’t make a move to turn off the engine or take his seatbelt off. Usually it would be fine—going home by yourself for the night—but you imagine your best friend returning to his apartment and the thought makes your heart pinch.

“Want to stay the night?” You throw out the idea with obvious enthusiasm. “It’s Friday!”

“Stay the night?” He repeats your question quietly, eyes looking ahead. 

“Yeah.” You finally reach to unbuckle the seat belt that feels tight against your chest. “I don’t really want to hang out by myself. I’m still wide awake.” You try to give a solid reason. “You don’t want to keep being with me?”

Jungkook’s head immediately turns in your direction and his eyes are big and guilty on you. “No, no.” He shakes his head now, “That’s not…of course,” He pauses, gulping down his spit before continuing. “Of course I’d still love to be with you, y/n.” He tells you, eyes still looking guilty. “Is that what you want?”

You feel it’s a bit easier to breathe. Because the seatbelt is no longer caging you in? Or because he still wants to be with you? Either way, you’re content. “Yeah.” You say, nodding in the direction of your house. “Let’s go inside and have tea or something. We can watch a movie.”

Jungkook nods slowly, his fingers messing with the buckle of the seatbelt before he’s getting out of his own restraint. “Okay.” And then he’s turning off the car.

You both walk to your front door in silence, side by side and you feel a mix of emotions swirling inside your belly. You cringe at yourself and laugh internally because why does it feel like the kind of nerves you have after a first date? 

You walk slowly and so does he. He’s right next to you and you feel fucking nervous. And you know what doesn’t help? When his knuckles barely brush against yours on fucking accident and you both quickly bring your hands to yourselves. How strange. How awkward. But also, how interesting.

Once inside your home, you head to the kitchen to make some tea. Jungkook accompanies you but he’s only sitting at the counter, fingers laced on top as he stares down at his hands in silence. Since waking up from the coma, you have felt a strong, lingering sadness inside of Jungkook but lately, especially after today, you feel it’s only gotten stronger.

You blame yourself, of course. He’s your best friend and you know with everything that has happened that he’s taken it hard. You don’t blame him, you have lost nine years of your important friendship with him and you imagine that must be tough for him to live with. But what really worries you is that he lives alone in an apartment that feels like the furthest thing from a ‘home’ and he isn’t able to talk to you about it. Is he afraid he would overwhelm you?

“Here.” You slide a cup of tea across the granite countertop. “It’s hot, though.”

“Thanks.” He murmurs, eyes lifting to yours and you wish you could make the apparent sadness in them go away. 

You decide to lighten the mood with a small, teasing grin. “See? I can do things for you too!”

Jungkook’s big eyes only look more sad as he responds, “You always do things for me, y/n.”

“Ah really?” You keep your gaze on him, grin falling into a tender smile. “Like what? What’s something that I’ve done for you that I have no idea?”

Jungkook cracks a half smile, “You’re trying to get things out of me, huh?”

You respond with a smirk, “Tell me something harmless, Jungkook.” 

Jungkook hums out cutely, eyes narrowing before he reaches for the cup of tea and blowing on it, eyes locking with yours, taking his sweet time as you wait. 

“Oh, come on.” You place your elbows to the counter and lean your chin into your palms, “I can handle it.” 

“Okay.” He says before taking a small sip of the tea. “I was working really late one night…on a really important case.” Jungkook stares down at the cup of tea in his hands before setting it back down. A certain look flashes across his face but he shakes it off. “I was so stressed and you showed up out of nowhere. I swear, the only times Jimin smiled at work is when you’d show up.” He rolls his eyes at this, “But anyway, you showed up with takeout and homemade cookies. And you hung out with me for a while to kind of,” He pauses to think about it. “I don’t know, I think you just wanted to distract me from the stress for a while before I got back into work.”

“Homemade cookies?” You tilt your head, “Since when do I bake?”

He chuckles, “You got pretty good at baking.”

“Oh wow.”

“Anyway, I remember when I thought I finally got a good idea on how to crack the particular case and I didn’t even have to tell you anything.” He bites down onto his bottom lip, perhaps suppressing a smile. “I swear you saw the look on my face and you knew immediately. You left me to it and I got the furthest I had ever gotten. Anyway, I swear I wouldn’t have without you showing up that night to kind of get me out of my head so I could have fresh thoughts, I guess.”

“Wow, I’m amazing. I’m like your support detective.” You soften, dopey smile growing on your lips. “I should have become one too.” You say, obviously joking.

“Well, you’d be good at it.” He tells you, fingers wrapping around the warm tea cup again. “You’re the whole reason I wanted to become a detective, anyway.”

Your eyebrows climb up your forehead in genuine shock, “W-What?”

“Oh, right.” Jungkook’s eyes stay on the tea. “I didn’t tell you that until years later, huh?”

 You straighten your posture and point at yourself, “I’m the reason?”

Jungkook’s eyes stay lingering on the cup in his hands, “Yeah.”

“Can I ask why?”

He finally tears his eyes off the cup and looks at you with a smile, “I’d expect you to.”

You stare at him in complete awe, your dopey smile returning to your face. “Okay then—”

Suddenly, your phone is ringing in your pocket. You’re quick to slide it out and see who is calling you and you glance at Jungkook in apology when you show him the screen to show Misuk is calling. 

“Hello?” You answer on the fifth ring.

“Hey!” Misuk sings out, “Sorry it’s kind of late but Subin and I were thinking of having breakfast at that café she likes. Want to come? Like 10ish?”

“Oh,” You look at Jungkook again, his attention on the tea. “Yeah, that sounds nice. Can Jungkook come too?” You ask, innocence in your voice but Jungkook looks up at you immediately, worry in his eyes before he’s shaking his head. 

“Umm,” Misuk is quiet on the other end for a moment before continuing, “I was thinking it could be a girls thing?”

“Since when did we only do girls stuff and exclude—”

“It’s okay.” Jungkook whispers to you, head still shaking. 

“Fine,” You keep your eyes on him, “Girls thing it is.”

“It’ll be fun! The three of us!” Misuk tells you, “I’ll text when I’m on the way in the morning. See you then.”

“Okay, see you. Bye.” You lower the phone from your ear, pressing the ‘end’ button before placing your phone on the counter. “Sorry, it’s a girls thing.”

“It’s okay!” Jungkook gives you a trying smile. “You should spend time, just you three. They’ve missed you, too.”

“Yeah,” You nod at him. “I guess you’re right.”

“Should we watch a movie now?” Jungkook stands from the stool, taking his cup of tea with him. 

“Ugh, another movie to spark a memory, huh?” You watch as he makes his way to the living room, your feet dragging behind him. 

Jungkook turns only for a moment, “No. An old movie we both love. A movie you already know.”

You can guess why, but the pressure to not try hard to remember something you’re supposed to know suddenly makes you feel so much lighter. And Jungkook probably knows you’ve had enough for the day. “Perfect.” You answer, “That sounds perfect.”

~~~

Waking up drenched in sweat in not how you expected to greet this Saturday morning’s sun. You lay here, eyes wide and on the ceiling trying your hardest to replay the dream you just had. You aren’t laying here trying your best to rewatch a nightmare. No, that’s not why you woke up with sweat gathered at your hairline and a racing heartbeat. You’re trying so hard to replay every little detail of this dream because it was hot. Steamy, sexy hot. Not hot as in heat and that’s why you’re sweating. 

You close your eyes, images of the dream swarming behind your eyelids. Hands. Hands all over you. Lips. Lips all over you. Tongue. Tongue all over you. Your eyes spring open again, your chest still heaving from the dream as you try to dive back into it. But the dream is fading. And it’s fading fast. Suddenly, you can’t remember any of the details anymore. And it pisses you off. 

After showering and getting ready for your breakfast hang out with the girls, you quietly slip out of your bedroom. You walk through the hall and you stop dead in your tracks when you spot Jungkook. He’s innocently sleeping on your sofa, mouth slightly hung open as soft snores escape. He looks peaceful. You swallow hard, your fingers smoothing down your blouse as you keep watching him. 

How would Jungkook feel knowing you just had a very steamy sex dream about him? His hands, his lips, his tongue. Lucky for him—and lucky for you—you don’t remember too much about it anymore. But you know the dream happened. But as much as you wish you could remember every little detail and play it in your mind on repeat to fulfill some delusional fantasy of yours…you’re actually glad that it can’t distract you for the rest of the day.

Because it fucking would.

You check the time on your phone.

9:32am

You need to head out. You take one last look at sleeping Jungkook before turning on your heels to grab your purse, shoes and keys to your car. You have yet to drive your own vehicle so it’ll feel a bit fun—brand new car to you—and Dr. Lee says you can drive short distances now.

You pull into the same café that Subin brought you to that one time, eyes on the lookout for a parking spot but it is Saturday morning and it’s looking busy. Finally, after driving in circles, you see someone pulling out and you rush to take the free spot. 

Inside the café is just as busy as the parking lot. Tons of full tables, servers running around in panic about some wrong order and the hostess remaining calm as customers complain about the long wait. Luckily, Subin and Misuk got here before you and they already have a table. Somewhere near the back again, by the bathrooms. 

You spot Subin, waving her hands around with a huge smile on her face. You return her smile while walking closer to the table that her and Misuk are at. 

But you run into someone—literally.

“Oh sorry!” You apologize quickly, “I—” You stop speaking when the same feeling as last time comes back to haunt you. You glance down at the name tag again.

Nabi.

“Oh…no, no.” She shakes her head, smile on her lips. “It’s okay. Really…it’s okay…” She tells you, her eyes suddenly looking everywhere but you. Her voice is soft and kind. And so fucking familiar. 

“You’re the one who served us last time.” You tell her, trying your best to make eye contact. “You probably don’t remember—”

“—Ah, no. I remember.” Nabi finally looks at you and there is undeniable kindness in her eyes as well but there is also something else. She glances around again, her eyes going to other tables, to the windows, behind her, behind you…before she finally looks at you again. You see concern in her eyes. “Have a lovely meal.” She says quickly, bowing her head before walking off. 

Weird.

You shake off the familiar feeling before approaching the table your friends are at.

“Hey!” You call out, still a feet few away before you’re pulling a free chair out and sitting down. “This place is poppin’, huh?” You say while glancing around. 

“Yeah.” Subin agrees right away, “Crazy, right? It’s only been open for like, what? Two years probably? I saw a Tik Tok about it and had to check it out.”

“Not even going to ask about whatever Tik Tok is.” You mumble, eyes going down to the menu in your hands.

“I told you about it!” Subin whines, “You need to download it!”

“Eh,” You shrug. “33 year old me is off social media apparently. I’m trying to respect her wishes.” You joke, eyes scanning the menu when you see an omelet that catches your eye.

“And how is 24 year old you liking that?” Misuk chuckles, “Are you surviving?”

“Somehow I am.” You laugh as well before your mind thinks of something else…”Hey…do you guys know why I deleted my social media?” You look up from your menu, “I didn’t think much of it but,” You look between your two friends but they don’t have any answers written on their faces. “Well, Jungkook mentioned it was maybe around six months ago…and here’s the crazy thing…I ran into this guy who said I randomly ghosted him around the same time!” 

Misuk’s brows pinch together, “A guy?” She then glances at Subin who looks as confused as her.

“Yeah!” You nod quickly, “I thought maybe he was an ex. So I started connecting the dots! Maybe we broke up and I wanted to lay low after the breakup? And that’s why I del—”

“—A breakup?” Subin asks, her eyes going between you and Misuk. “I don’t think you were…dating anyone…” She says slowly, carefully. Eyes darting between you and Misuk and you can see how she’s silently asking Misuk to help out. And as usual, Misuk doesn’t get the hint.

“Maybe I just didn’t want to make a big deal about it?” You question more to yourself. “Maybe I was trying to be lowkey…”

“Did you tell Jungkook?” Misuk finally contributes. “Did he know who the guy was?”

“Huh?” You finally set the menu down to the table. “No, he wasn’t with me. And when I mentioned it, he had no idea either.” 

“Well, I feel just as clueless.” Subin admits softly. “Maybe the guy got the wrong girl.”

“No,” You look down, teeth nibbling on your lips. “I think he knew me.”

“Well, maybe it just isn’t important.” Misuk decides to say, her eyes going back to the menu. “What’s important is you regaining memories that probably matter more.”

“Workin’ on it, boss.” You say blandly, with the roll of your eyes. 

“Hey,” Misuk’s tone grows softer. “I know.”

“Anyway,” You shake your head and plaster a smile on your face. “Subin, your pictures were this week, right?”

And immediately, Subin’s face brightens. You love how in love she looks. “Yes! Oh my god, I have a few that the photographer sent me. Let me show you!” She is quickly grabbing her phone and finding the photos. 

You take her phone and start scrolling through a few images. Your heart melts at the sight…Subin looks gorgeous in the arms of her soon to be husband. You don’t even remember his name. And his face in these photos definitely don’t ring a bell.  “You look amazing.” You breathe out, “And so happy.”

“Thanks.” Subin blushes at the compliment, “Garam is the love of my life. And I can’t believe we waited this long to get married and what not!”

“Well, we all know y/n doesn’t believe in wasting any time when she knows something is right.” Misuk chuckles, “Remember when she switched her major the second she realized she loved digital art more than environmental science?”

“Oh yeah,” Subin covers her mouth while she giggles. “She didn’t even have experience in it, right? But she looked us in the eyes and said, ‘I’m going to do this as my career.’ And the next day went to her advisor and made the switch.”

“What can I say?” You smile, feeling proud. “I knew it in my gut that it was what I was meant to do.”  

“I also remember that Subin and I were so against it.” Misuk shakes her head, still smiling. “We asked you to at least think about it!”

“I swear maybe she would have thought about it but Jungkook was totally on her side.” Subin sighs out, “He took one look at what she created on her tablet and said—”

“Isn’t this what you’re meant to do?” You say, almost dreamily as you remember your best friend’s words. “He even went with me when I went to talk to my advisor. He waited outside the door and when I was finished he took me drinking to celebrate.”

“Went drinking?” Misuk avoids your eyes, “Not surprised.” 

“Misuk.” Subin says quietly before brightening again. “How are things with Jungkook? He’s taking care of you?”

“He’s the best.”

“The best.” Misuk scoffs.

“Misuk.” Subin says her name louder this time. “It’s—”

“—I don’t know what went wrong with you and Jungkook, Misuk.” You cut in, face falling more serious. “But Jungkook is my person and I hate seeing how you clearly have beef with him. He’s being civil so why can’t you be?”

An inevitable silence falls on the table. As well as inevitable tension. 

You take a deep breath, trying to calm your fiery nerves. “Just tell me what happened already. I can’t stand—”

“No.” Misuk says, voice calm but there is something cold to it. “Not yet, anyway.”

“Why?” 

She looks at Subin who is, as usual, speaking with her eyes. “I just can’t.” Misuk tells you, finally looking your way. “Nothing would make sense anyway. Let’s just drop it. I’m sorry.”

You scoff. And you scoff loudly. “Okay.” You feel peeved but you don’t want to ruin the breakfast. “I’m going to use the bathroom really quickly.” You begin standing from your chair and point towards the wall behind you three where the bathrooms are.

Neither of them answer with words. 

You walk into the hallway and immediately lean against the wall, sighing out quietly as you try to remain calm. You hate not knowing what’s going—in regards to so many things. Your ears perk up when you can hear Subin and Misuk’s voices from behind the wall.

“You need to go easier on him, Misuk…” You hear Subin’s quiet voice. “This has been hard on everyone. But especially—”

“—Good.” You hear Misuk cut her off bitterly. “I hope he’s fucking suffering.”

Your entire face twists into a look of confusion…what the hell is happening?

“You don’t mean that.” Subin says. “He’s your friend too.”

“Why are you always defending him?”

“I’m not. But we don’t even really know—”

“Drop it, Subin. It gets us nowhere.” 

And then there’s silence. Like their own inevitable tension rises around the table now too. 

You finally tear yourself away from the wall and go inside the restroom. More questions and even less answers. Great.

~

It’s already late afternoon when you return home, tired eyes land on Jungkook who is on the phone while sitting on your sofa. You raise a hand to lazily wave at him and he nods at you while he continues to speak on the phone.

“I know.” He talks into the phone quietly, “You swear he has—Okay, okay. Got it. I can be there in 20.” Jungkook doesn’t even wait for the other person to respond before he’s ending the call. “Hey.” He stands, slipping his phone in his pocket and smiling at you. “How was time with the girls?”

You eye him suspiciously. It feels like how you’re seeing everyone nowadays. “Fine.” You look down at your feet as you take your shoes off. “What have you been up to?”

“Just relaxing.” He tells you, “Working on some stuff too.” He glances at his open laptop that sits on your sofa as well. “But I actually got to head out for a while.”

“Sure.” You respond, feeling and sounding detached. You walk into the living room but before you can sit down, Jungkook’s fingers wrap around your wrist and you struggle not to look into his eyes and crumble. 

“What’s wrong?” Jungkook questions you softly. His fingers still wrapped around your wrist and you swear you feel the heat seep into your skin, like the feeling of first dipping into a hot bubble bath. “You okay? Tired? How’s your head?”

You don’t mean to pull away so quickly, freeing your wrist without much thought. “I’m fine.” 

Jungkook’s brows pull together, his eyes going to his fingers when he examines how empty his hand is now. “O…kay.” His eyes go back to you, “Are you sure?” “No.” You say honestly. “But it’s whatever.”

“It’s not whatever.” Jungkook steps closer to you, his eyes searching yours for answers. “Talk to me, y/n.” He doesn’t rip his gaze off your eyes. He’s staring at you intently and it feels so confusing. “Please…talk to me.”

You feel sucked into the way he’s looking at you. You see his concern so clearly. You see so many thoughts and feelings taking over his eyes and you can read them but some don’t make sense. Not now. You force yourself to look away.

“I said I’m fine.” You sit on the couch, hand going to the top of his laptop and you shut it yourself. “Aren’t you leaving?” 

Jungkook stands here, unsure of what to do. You can see that. You can see how he struggles with how to handle this. You stare at nothing. Hoping there isn’t any readable expression on your face. But you guess there is.

“Y/n…” Jungkook says your name. And suddenly you wish you forgot that too. 

“What?” You finally snap at him, eyes landing on his figure. But you gulp, guilt settling in your chest when you see how he winces. You close your eyes for just a moment, collecting yourself even though you don’t even want to. “I’m so—”

“—Don’t be sorry.” He cuts you off, tone gentle. “It’s okay if you can’t talk to me but is there anything I could do? To help you?”

You open your eyes again, staring at him. You just stare. Expression hardening because you can’t help it at this point. But Jungkook takes no offense. Instead he tries to smile for you and he takes a seat right next to you, his leg pushed against yours.

“What is it that you need?” His fingers go to your chin, barely touching it as he guides your face to tilt in his direction. “Tell me what you need.” He softly demands, eyes boring into yours and you feel trapped in his trance again.

“You.” You reveal without meaning to. You never intended for that to be your answer. But your mouth forced the word out and you’re left here wondering why that felt so natural. 

Natural for both of you.

Because Jungkook nods in understanding, his fingers brushing against your cheek now and you decide now is the time to crumble. Crumble because his touch. And crumble because you are best friends so answering that the thing you need is him could also still be platonic. You release a long, tired breath before your head falls to his shoulder. “I’m stressed.” You decide to admit.

“I know.” His other arm comes around your back, hand gripping your side. “I’m sorry this is so hard for you. I really don’t know what to do anymore.” He is the one with admissions now. “I see how hard this is for you and I don’t know what’s better or what’s worse…but these are still doctor’s orders, y/n. You—”

“—I know.” You squeeze your eyes shut, “But what if my memories never return? Am I just going to be a stranger to my own life forever? Your life forever?”

Silence fills the space between you both. 

Maybe it’s not something either of you want to have answers to. 

“I never want to be a stranger to you.” He finally responds, “But let’s give some things some time.”

You sigh out, lifting your head from his shoulder before you look up at him. “Can you promise me something?”

Jungkook gives you a determined nod before speaking, “I can promise you anything.”

“Do you promise this is the best for me? Me not knowing so much?” Your eyes are pleading and you swear you see Jungkook’s heart in his eyes and you see how it breaks into pieces.

“I promise you that this is best for you.” He tells you, no regret anywhere heard in his words. Truth. “So promise me…that you’ll always trust me.”

“Okay.”

“No,” He shakes his head, troubled smile on his face. “Say it.”

“I promise.” You tell him but his troubled smile only grows as his eyes turn somber.

“You will probably break that promise later.” He whispers, “I—”

His phone starts vibrating in his pocket. Another phone call. “Sorry,” He slides the device out and you see Jimin’s name. “I got to go.” He sighs, standing from the sofa now. “But I’ll come over after and we’ll do something fun, okay?”

You nod, “Okay. Umm,”

“What is it?” He asks you.

“Nothing, nothing.” You try to shake his last words out of your head. Why would he say that? “Be safe and come back to me later.”

Jungkook’s eyes expand at your words before he cracks a smile. “I always do.”

~

You fixed yourself something light and easy for dinner. Surprisingly, you had an appetite to eat. You could probably thank the four hour nap you took earlier and the two different sessions you had in your bed where your fingers met the sensitive parts of your body, having yourself come undone and although you feel like some tension has been released…it wasn’t totally satisfying. 

You’ll blame the dream that you can’t even remember for the ache between your legs that still lingers.

You’re sitting at the dining room table, plate growing emptier as you take one last bite of your late dinner. It’s around 8:30pm and Jungkook still isn’t back. You assume he’s off doing something with Jimin. His ex-work partner that you realize he isn’t necessarily fond of. But they’re clearly working together on something…despite the fact that Jungkook isn’t a detective anymore.

Of course this piques your interest. You’re dying of curiosity. You have an idea…but…

You sigh out, pushing the chair back and ignoring the way the wood screeches against your tiled kitchen floors. Once standing, you grab your plate and the glass of water and head towards the kitchen sink to run the hot water.

A couple minutes pass, your hand lazily squeezing the sponge as you scrub the plate clean, your eyes zoned out and focusing on nothing at all. You continue to scrub the plate in soapy circles before you suddenly see something in your head. Eyes narrowing at nothing now as you try to focus on the image that your brain has randomly come up with. The same lake and boats from your dream. You’re just recalling an old dream. You scoff to yourself, you wish you could remember your sex dream.

You laugh a little before it dies on your lips when you see another image that makes no sense. 

A boat, floating at the dock. It isn’t the same boat from your dream…a different—

You drop the plate to the sink when your ears ring in someone’s scream. 

What the fuck?

You look around quickly, but you’re met with silence. You wipe your hands on the towel that rests next to the sink, quickly drying them before rushing out of your kitchen and going to your front door.

You know you heard someone scream.

You swing the door open, stepping outside, your head whipping in every direction.

But the neighborhood looks unbothered, the stars in the sky look unbothered, the blades of grass look unbothered. You see a few houses down, an older couple sitting on their porch, quietly talking and laughing to themselves. Completely unbothered.

Someone screamed, right? You heard it, right? 

You remain outside for a few more moments but the night carries on like nothing happened.

You didn’t imagine the scream, right? You know you heard it. You were standing at your kitchen sink, washing dishes, remembering a dream about boats on the lake water…when someone screamed. That wasn’t part of your dream, right? But it sounded so real. 

Giving up, you decide to go back inside your house. But a strange, eerie feeling sticks to your skin and you want nothing more than to wash it off. A shower it is. Maybe Jungkook will be back by the time you’re done and you can forget about all the things your brain is forcing onto you—things that don’t make any sense at all.

It’s around 9:30pm now when you leave your bedroom, feet taking you into the living room so you can relax on your amazing sofa…you’re shocked now that you hated it at first glance. It’s definitely the best couch you’ve ever had the pleasure of owning. A dull pain resides on the other side of your skull, pushing against your forehead in rage. You wish the headaches would start to ease but it seems lately, they’ve only gotten worse.

You decide to go to the kitchen first and take your night dose of medications, realizing it’s time you can take them. Hopefully it’ll help. It’s been a long day and you can’t wait to totally unwind and grow invested in some TV show so you don’t have to think about your own life. And you can’t wait for Jungkook to get home so he can do that with you. He looks stressed too and he probably also needs to focus on some fictional problems instead of his own.

Once you’re cozy on your sofa, wrapped in the blanket Jungkook always uses, you check your phone for any messages and you feel yourself grow a little warmer when you do have one.

Jungkook 9:38pm

Hey I’m on my way to your house 👍🏼 Want me to bring you anything?

You smile, typing your reply.

y/n 9:44pm

no no just you🐸

You click your phone off and shake your head, laughing at yourself. All it takes for you to feel better is Jungkook. You’re so whipped, probably. 

It only takes Jungkook 24 minutes exactly to walk in through your door since his text. Not that you were paying attention to the time but of course you were. You missed him.

“You’re not sleepy yet?” Jungkook is bent over, looking at you through the fringe that falls over his eyes as he takes his shoes off. “I figured you’d be knocked out on the couch by the time I got here and then oh no, I’d have to sleep in the bed.” He jokes, making his way over to you.

“I took a long nap.” You say, eyes on the TV. “So I’m not very sleepy now.”

Jungkook’s lips curve into a soft smile, “Did the nap help make you feel a little better?”

You finally glance at him, “Yeah. Also,” You nod towards the hallway, “You can sleep in a bed. You just choose not to.”

Jungkook’s smile fades, his eyes following yours, a solemn expression falling onto his face when he looks over to the hallway. “No, that’s okay.” He murmurs. “I like the couch.” And then he takes a seat right next to you.

“Does that mean you’re sleeping over again tonight?” 

He blinks at you for a few seconds before he’s smiling sheepishly. “Sorry, I didn’t even think about that.”

You laugh, “I’d rather you be here, anyway. Your apartment is too far for my liking. Doesn’t feel like we’re neighbors enough.” 

Jungkook’s eyes are so soft on you. You hate it. You love it. You want more of it. You want less of it. 

“It feels a little colder out tonight.” He says, fingers tugging at the blanket that’s wrapped around you. “Mind sharing?”

You chuckle, unwrapping the blanket from yourself to share with your best friend. “Do you remember when we rented that cabin in college but you and I wanted the outdoors experience so we built a tent like 10 feet away from the cabin?” 

“You only packed one sleeping bag.” He deadpans. 

“You could have gone inside and got blankets if you really cared that much!” You throw back and he shakes his head in an instant.

“Then it wouldn’t have been the total outdoorsy camping experience!” He retorts, “It would have defeated the whole point of us building that tiny tent. That you claimed you knew how to build because of a YouTube tutorial.”

“And I swear I did! But we had no service! So I couldn’t look at the video…” You pout but Jungkook starts laughing.

“And then we had to actually read the instructions. Imagine that.” He rolls his eyes, playful smirk on his lips. “Well, I did. You wanted to give up.”

“Anyway,” You nudge his shoulder with yours, both of you completely covered in this blanket now. “This reminds me of that time.”

“Because we shared the sleeping bag?” He asks you innocently. 

You nod, “Yeah. I thought we were going to freeze to death at night but I learned really quickly how freaking hot your body is.”

“Oh, thank you.” He teases.

You snort, “Not what I meant.”

“It’s not like you don’t think that too, though.” He says, eyes on the TV screen now. 

You whip your head to look at him, his eyes totally avoiding yours as he watches whatever you have pulled up on Netflix. He’s got such a teasing grin splitting his face in half. You stare at him in disbelief before you start laughing, “Wow. Is that something I told you and I have zero memory of it? And don’t lie, once I get all my memories back, I’ll know.” 

“You might be surprised at what stuff you might remember.” He continues to tease you and it feels…strange yet familiar. More of your suspicions seem to be checking out. 

“Is that so?” You decide to play along, “What kinds of things will I remember? You know, that are in relation to you thinking you have a hot body?”

“I never said it’s what I thought.” He bites down onto his bottom lip, another smirk being poorly concealed. 

You scoff, heat creeping up the back of your neck. “It’s not what I think either.”

“Mhm.” He finally looks at you, “You sure?” 

No, you aren’t sure. Well, you are sure that he’s hot. Yes, of course. But you aren’t sure what is going on here. More confusion wraps around you both just like this blanket. This doesn’t feel how you always remembered. No, this feels different. But it feels familiar. Like it isn’t totally brand new but it is. For you. But you’re wondering if this is brand new to him.

Yes, you have your suspicions. And little by little, you will uncover the truth. But for now, you’re not going to jump the gun. No conclusions yet.

“Hey,” You finally look away from him, eyes going back to the TV as well. “Are you sure we never went to another lake?”

“Lake?” Jungkook’s attention is mostly on the show now. “What lake?”

“No…I mean, was the only time we ever went to a lake was during that trip to the cabin?”

“Yes?” He finally glances at you, confusion in his eyes. “Why?”

You shrug, “I don’t know. I feel like I was remembering that dream I told you about where I saw your tattoo. That same lake…the boats.” 

“It was a dream, right?”

You think about it for a moment, eyes losing focus. “Yeah, you’re right.” But you aren’t so sure. 

“I told my parents and your parents that we would visit not next weekend but the weekend after. They’re very excited.” Jungkook changes the subject, his tone lighthearted. “It’ll be so nice to be in Busan for the weekend.”

“I agree.” You say, your eyes widening when you remember something your mom told you. “Did you know Mrs. Jung remarried? Apparently to a guy half her age!” 

Jungkook starts laughing, eyes crinkling in the process. “Yes and did you hear the best part?” He asks, eyes on you. “Apparently the guy she married has the same last name as her ex-husband so she didn’t even have to change it.” 

“Wow, lucky her.” You chuckle, “I don’t remember my mom saying that part.” 

“It’s hilarious. I thought the guy was her son when I first saw them walking out of her house! But imagine my shock when he kissed her. On the lips. I still didn’t register it wasn’t her son so you can probably guess my confusion and level of disturbance.” Jungkook shudders when he recalls the memory. “Mrs. Jung is loaded though, so I guess he’s the lucky one.”

“Jungkook!” You slap his thigh, “Money isn’t everything! Maybe he’s deeply in love with her!”

“I never said he wasn’t! I’m just saying, he got lucky. Sugar mama and all that.” He snickers when you gape at him. “What? I’d love having a woman pay for all my shit.”

“You’re a gold digger now?” You cock a brow at him. “I’ll have to keep that in mind when I’m being your wing woman at bars again.”

“You’re the worst wing woman.” He rolls his eyes, “Every girl that would get interested in me, you’d scare them away.”

“I did not!” 

“Yeah, you would.” 

“No.”

“Really?” He leans away from you, eyes narrowed as he smirks. “You don’t remember when a very pretty girl tried hitting it off with me but you totally ruined it when you—”

“—I thought she was bothering you. Don’t get me started on this again. She had so many red flags, you cannot be serious. I was helping you out.”

“I didn’t care about her red flags! I was just looking to get laid.” 

“I thought you didn’t hook up with anyone you weren’t seriously interested in?” 

Jungkook’s eyes widen and he starts talking nonsense, clearly getting playfully defensive. “Do I need to remind you why I was out in the first place?” He challenges you. “Because if I remember correctly, you told me I should go out and find someone! You told me I needed to get laid because I was annoying you with how stressed I was with my training after the academy. It was during my first year in the investigation department.”

“Oh yeah, you were kind of unbearable.” You snort, “But come on, she was such bad news. And don’t make me remind you of Haesoo. I had every right to feel protective over you!”

“Oh god, Haesoo…” He cringes in his spot, “Okay, she was something else.”

“She was the worst.” You say with a straight face. “I’m your best friend and she openly admitted to me ‘girl to girl’” You mock with the roll of your eyes, “That she was using you for sex. I had to tell her that you’re a person. But she said, ‘he’s hot, all men are trash so I’m not hurting anyone’ I was so fucking pissed.”

“Yes, yes. I remember.” Jungkook smiles at you fondly. “My hero.”

“I am your hero, you’re goddamn right! You didn’t see through her evil ways but I did. I wanted to put her in a headlock.”

“Somehow I’d love to see that.” He grins teasingly at you. “It’s not like I was serious about her.”

“You totally liked her.”

“Okay fine, but only because she did witchcraft on me or something.”

“I’ll accept that answer because I think it’s true.” You say, “But honestly, you got better at standing up for yourself. Haesoo was during your time at the academy, right? You were what? 21? 22?”

“Yeah.”

“You were still pretty shy back then but I think sometime after you graduated and you started your first 6 months at the police station—before you did your one year in the investigation department—you kind of…grew up a lot. Stronger, I guess. Not as scared of confrontation.”

“Well,” Jungkook leans back into the sofa, “I guess in my years of being your friend, I finally learned something.” He chuckles.

“Thank god for that, huh?” You lean back onto the sofa as well, your body shifting to properly face him. “Who’s the worst guy I ever dated?”

“Hmm,” Jungkook looks up at the ceiling, thinking about it. “Dusik for sure.”

“What?! He was so nice!”

“I didn’t like him.”

“You never told me you didn’t like him!”

“Yes I did!”

“When—”

“—Oh.” Jungkook bites down onto his lip, “I guess I never admitted it until way later. You don’t remember…”

“Give me a reason.”

“I just didn’t like him.”

“Why?”

“Because I didn’t.”

“Why?”

“Seriously? You sound like a talking bird that only knows one word.”

“Why?”

He raises a brow at you, showing you he’s not enthused. “Stop.”

“Why?”

“Because he was probably the closest thing you had to a real relationship.” Jungkook purses his lips, eyes going to his hands. “And I just didn’t think he was good enough for you.”

Your mouth falls open, “Seriously?” 

“Seriously.” He responds childishly. 

“You didn’t approve of him because…you just sound jealous.” You snort, not taking this too seriously but Jungkook isn’t laughing.

“I was jealous of him.” He admits before the panic settles in his eyes. “Not in a weird way. I just hated that he was stealing you from me.”

“He didn’t steal—”

“—According to you, this was our biggest fight.” He reminds you, “You forgot about plans with me three times because you were with him. I wouldn’t have minded as much if you would have properly canceled. But apparently I was forgettable to you.” He sulks in his spot, an adorable pout on his lips but you can see that he’s still a little bitter about the whole thing.

“I know. I’m sorry. But hey, you got your revenge! You didn’t talk to me for four days. I hated those four days so much.”

“I hated it too.” He finally smiles, “At the time, those four days were like, the worst days ever. I wish I could go back. To when that was the worst thing.” He mumbles softly, smile still barely on his lips. 

“Hey,” You lean into him, eyes on his as you poke his cheek with your finger. “You also know you’re not forgettable to me, right? I literally have amnesia and my brain is still full of you.” 

Jungkook’s smile drops from his lips, eyes on yours with much more intensity as he processes your words. 

You are about to back away from him, a sudden tension growing between your bodies but before you can, Jungkook’s fingers go to your hand, you’re both twisted in one another’s directions. He’s so close. You’re so close. Your gaze drops to his lips when his tongue pokes out to lick them. The heat basically rolls off his skin and warms you up, reminding you of the night you two spent in that tiny tent—not that anything happened…it’s just the warmth, the close proximity. Not to mention, it might have been the first time you had not so innocent thoughts about your best friend.

His fingers leave your hand and you gulp, feeling the sudden absence of his touch but it doesn’t last long…not when his hand rests on the side of your face, fingers behind your ear, thumb brushing your cheek.

“Your brain isn’t full enough of me.” He whispers, eyes still boring into you and once again, you want to crumble. Crumble for a million reasons and right now, you can’t even name one.

“I don’t know if that’s even possible.” The words dribble out slowly. The tension growing, a force that pulls your bodies closer.

You stare up at him, both of your hands sliding up his chest and you feel his heart hammering against it. It’s strong. It’s loud. It’s alive. 

Jungkook is lost. You’re lost. A trance being shared between you both and you know for a fucking fact that this isn’t new to either of you. You have no proof but this moment might be evidence alone. This cannot be the first time you two share a moment like this. You refuse to believe this is a first. 

“Jung—”

“—Did you want to watch something like a movie?” Jungkook’s hand drops from your face, his cheeks flushing as he leans away from you, eyes going back to the TV. 

You feel like someone ripped a rug from beneath your feet. You stare at his side profile, body gone still as you process what just happened. And what is currently happening. 

You laugh internally again. Your hands coming back to your own body and you face the TV as well. “Yeah, a movie sounds good.” 

It seems your brain is playing tricks on you lately. Making you see things. Hear things.

But you cannot be imagining this. No, your brain can’t make you imagine a feeling, can it? 

Your gut is telling you one thing and you’ve always been one to listen to it.

~

Jungkook snuck out early this morning, leaving you a note that said he has some things to take care of but he would be back around dinner time.

You won’t feel annoyed, not today. You’re tired of questioning every little thing and today you just want to not think about all the things you don’t know. Today you just want to be lazy and binge watch an entire series or something. Today you just want to be a normal person. A person who doesn’t have amnesia. 

You made a sandwich for lunch and ate while watching a show. You’re already on episode 5 of Strong Woman Do Bong Soon and you realizing love is real, it has to be, because these two main characters are making you swoon. 

You make dinner as well, eating while continuing the show. You’re not even ashamed to admit you’re on episode 8 now. Meaning, you’ve watched eight hours of this show just today. You check your phone to see the time.

7:02pm

Jungkook still isn’t back and he hasn’t texted. You know you shouldn’t feel worried or anything. But you’re going to call him anyway.

Your heart feels calmer when he answers on the third ring.

“Hey,” You say into the phone. “I was just checking if you were uh, still coming over today.”

“Yeah.” You hear the smile in his voice. “I just came by my place real quick to shower. I’m about to head over though. Sorry, um, my plans ran a little longer than I thought. I should have let you know…”

“No, no, it’s okay.” You say, relief evident in your voice. “Sleep here tonight, too.”

“Okay.” He tells you softly, “I’ll see you in a few minutes.”

“Kay, bye.” You hang up the phone, already feeling lighter knowing he’s only five minutes away.

Just like magical clockwork, your front door opens and Jungkook is walking through. He grins at you, slipping his shoes off as he empties his pockets of his things. Wallet, phone and keys being placed on the little table by your entrance.

“Hi.” You sing out, patting the spot next to you on the couch. “I started a show today and I love it!”

“What show?” He asks, walking into the living room, eyes on the TV. “Oh! Strong girl! Yeah, this is your comfort show.” He tells you, plopping down right next to you. “We love it.”

Your mouth falls open in surprise, “I’ve seen it before?!”

Jungkook chuckles, “Yeah. You watch it every year.”

“Oh damn.” You nod to yourself, “I guess I really do love it.”

“Mmmmmm…” Jungkook leans back into the couch, eyes closing. “I’m so tired.”

“You do look a little tired.” You admit, fingers ruffling through his hair and he sighs in contentment.

“I almost fell asleep in the shower.” 

“Don’t tell me you’re already ready for bed? It’s barely 7!”

“Not bed…but what if I take a one hour power nap?” He cracks open one eye to look at you, “Super quick nap that gets me ready for a night full of binge watching the rest of this show?”

“Hmm,” You pull your fingers away from his hair. “Just one hour?”

“Just one hour.” He nods in excitement, “I promise I’ll wake up and hang out with you for the whole night.”

“Okay, deal.” You say, “Only because you do look pretty exhausted”

“You got no idea.” He tells you, “It was…a really long day.”

But he doesn’t elaborate. But you do have an idea what it could be about…

“Can I ask you something?” You blurt, your brain wired to demand answers. 

“Hm?” He sits up from leaning back, eyes focused on you.

“You were with Jimin, right?” You ask him, the words leave your mouth slowly as you gauge his reaction.

“Yeah.” He tells you and you know he’s being honest. But you aren’t done asking questions.

“And…” Your stomach feels uneasy from nerves but you continue, “Is it because…are you trying to…um, trying to figure out who caused my accident? Since it was a hit and run?” 

Jungkook tilts his head, eyes becoming unreadable. 

You reckon it’s a solid assumption. He was a detective after all.

Jungkook’s hand goes to his jaw, eyes going to the ceiling like he’s trying to figure out his answer when slowly you watch as his fingers slide down from his chin to his throat, fingers caressing the skin before he’s softly tugging at his neck and he finally answers, “Yeah.”

“Oh, okay. I figured.” You reply, eyes still on his fingers. “I kind of guessed that’s what you were up to.” 

He drops his hand and offers a timid smile, “Mhm.” 

Your insides are twisting.

“Well, I’ll let you sleep for an hour!” You stand from the sofa, “You better wake up when I tell you to, Jungkook.” You smile now, “I’ll be in the kitchen, think I’m going to make something.”

“Ah, okay.” Jungkook puts his feet up before laying back on the couch, blanket draped over him. “Can you turn the light off too?”

“Yup.” You walk towards the wall and switch the light off. Light from the kitchen still on and you start going towards it. “Have a nice nap.” You say before disappearing into the kitchen, only Jungkook’s distant hum in the background can be heard.

You take a seat on the uncomfortable bar stool and only one thought echoes in your mind.

He lied.

You sit here for like 30 minutes, trying to make sense of his lie. Why would he lie? But if he’s not doing that? Then what is he doing? What exactly has he been getting up to? You know he really was with Jimin. All the phone calls, the texts, the ‘going to take care of some things’. But if it’s not about your accident…then what is it about?

You sigh, feeling defeated because you can’t come up with a logical explanation. 

You don’t want to feel upset about the lie because he asked you to trust him so you will. And he does look utterly exhausted. You feel sorry for him…the state his apartment is in, losing his job, clearly working on something with Jimin. He’s tired. Not to mention, he takes care of you. 

And you want to do something for him. Something that will—that’s right. He did mention something…

You stand from the bar stool, excitement and nerves running through your veins as you rummage through the kitchen. You check every single drawer, cabinet, closet. You even looked in the fridge—desperate times, desperate measures. But nothing. No recipe books anywhere! You quietly go into the living room and search as well, eyes glancing at your knocked out best friend every now and then. Thank goodness he is a heavy sleeper. His snores are honestly louder than your rummaging, though.

There’s no way you don’t own any recipe books…you even remember the ones you had in college. You remember owning some as a 24 year old. So where are they? Jungkook said you got great at baking and he seemed to enjoy your homemade cookies—whichever ones they are. But there is no book around or papers or anything with a recipe on it!

But then a thought hits you. He didn’t…no, why would he? But maybe? You instantly remember the attic. How Jungkook put a bunch of stuff in there to not accidentally overwhelm you with a million things. It’s possible…? It wouldn’t hurt to look, right? You swear you’ll be careful. Eyes looking for recipe books and that’s it!

Alright, you made up your mind. You glance at sleeping, snoring Jungkook again. There’s no way he would wake up anytime soon…he’s completely passed out on your sofa due to exhaustion. You look towards the table by your front door, eyes on his things. His wallet, phone and of course, his keys.

You tip toe over to the entrance, one last glance at Jungkook before swiping the keys off the table. The jingle louder than you anticipated, head snapping in his direction but he only snores louder. You release a breath in relief. You look towards the hallway, a determined look on your face as you walk over there. 

But a look of annoyance quickly falls over your face. Right, it’s an attic. It’s locked. And it’s you know, on the freaking ceiling. You huff out quietly, trying to think of what you can do. Right…there’s a ladder in the guest bedroom closet. But you’re hoping you can do all of this quietly. 

You stuff the keys into your pocket and go inside the bedroom, quickly going into the mostly empty closet when you find the 6ft ladder leaning against the closet wall. You pick it up, thankfully it isn’t very heavy at all and bring it out into the hall, right below the attic door.

You listen for Jungkook’s snores and when you hear them you sigh out. Good. He’s still in deep sleep. You set the ladder up, climbing it quietly, stopping every few seconds to make sure you still hear Jungkook’s snores. Once near the top, you reach for the keys in your pocket. Feeling slightly uneasy being this high up. 

You try to steady yourself, fingers searching for the right key but you have no idea which one it could be. So you begin trying them one by one. Nope, not this one. Nope, not that one. You fiddle through the keys when you spot a small gold one and you decide to try it. You try to get it through the key hole when your shaky fingers fumble the keys and they fucking drop. You feel like you’re losing your balance, heart sinking to the bottom of your stomach. They landed on the metal step right next to your foot. Fucking lucky they didn’t fall to the ground. But damn, it was loud.

You try to calm your breathing.

Your ears paying close attention to every sound around you and a huge lump forms in your throat when you don’t hear the consistent sounds of Jungkook’s snores. 

You’re frozen in your spot. Skin feeling cold but sweaty. Like you’re doing something you’re not supposed to.

After what feels like an eternity your entire body fucking relaxes when Jungkook starts snoring again.

You swear you could laugh and cry at the relief you’re feeling. 

You carefully step down to easily grab the keys again before stepping back up. Your fingers are still shaky but you manage to find that small gold key again and you try to fit it through the keyhole. You try turning it and bam. The door unlocks. 

You wish you could scream in celebration but you remain quiet. 

It’s unlocked.

Feeling giddy, you quickly step down from the ladder and move it to the side. You reach for the long string and pull hard, the door coming down and a wooden staircase follows. You’ve done it. You’ve opened the attic and now you can do as you promised, you can find the recipe books and get the hell out of there before Jungkook even knows you went in.

You take a hesitant first step, glancing once more behind you, his snores soft and consistent before you finally climb the steps and go inside.

It’s dark, dusty and maybe a bit creepy. You reach for your phone, turning on the flashlight as you look around. You find the light switch, turning it on and suddenly the entire attic is glowing in a soft yellow. 

Boxes everywhere. You don’t even know where to begin looking. But the nearest boxes are probably the most promising, right? Your fingers slide over the top of one of the brown boxes before you decide to pry it open. But you aren’t really sure what you’re seeing. A bunch of books, loose papers and random notes. It’s your handwriting. But you don’t know what anything means. So you ignore this box.

You open the next box but there isn’t anything but old clothes in that one.

Next box is a bunch of notebooks.

You groan in frustration, okay maybe this pile wasn’t as promising as you thought so you decide to move on to the other side of the attic. A few boxes that are less dusty than the rest. Okay, maybe this is more promising.

You open the first box you see, fingers lifting each flap open and when your eyes land on the thing lying on the top, your jaw immediately drops. Your heart is thumping more wildly than you’ve ever known, chest tight and stomach dropping completely where all the butterflies reside. You stare at what you’re seeing. In shock? Disbelief? Your hands are still just as shaky as you reach for the thing that rests at the top of this particular box. 

Fingers wrapping around the frame, eyes blinking rapidly as you try to make sense of what you’re seeing. 

Well, you had your suspicions. But not this far. You thought you and Jungkook perhaps maybe hooked up before during these past nine years, or that you did confess to him at some point or you don’t know, but not this. 

You aren’t sure if it’s shock, disbelief or your own selfish happiness. 

You lift the frame up, a smile growing viscously on your lips. “Well, holy shit.” You mutter to yourself. “No fucking way.”

You stare at the framed photo. You and Jungkook, together, in a wedding gown and tux. The year 2016 engraved at the bottom. 

Jungkook isn’t just your best friend.

No, he is also your husband.

~

Next

[fanfic-inator795]

SPOILERS FOR “THE END”

Okay so, much like the ending of Amphibia, I’m sure this ending’s gonna be controversial for some people for being so bittersweet and for it also ending with the two BFFs splitting seemingly forever… but honestly? I fucking loved it.

While the penultimate ep felt slightly rushed and just a tad unsatisfying due to all they had to cram in and wrap up, I love that this show’s finale was ultimately focused on just Molly, Scratch, and the latter’s series-wide arc of changing for the better and “being brought back to life”, as the TGAMM show bible put it.

Having believed in the Wraith feeling since the start, I was afraid that the Todd reveal would feel rushed given that the crew lost the 3rd season of set-up they wanted, but thankfully it managed to feel fairly natural since - while Todd himself may have been a more subtle hint that you’d only notice if you were paying attention- again, Scratch’s arc and the clear changes we see from him are made known throughout the series. So by the time you finally get to the big payoff, it feels like a natural conclusion.

For all the info dumps we got, I also felt like the ep was pretty well paced as well, still having jokes that made me laugh so it never felt too heavy or melodramatic. I also love that all the major characters in Scratch’s life got to play a role in this one final adventure. I also love that - for as important of a role that Adia played in helping Scratch regain his memories - it wasn’t framed as Scratch choosing his old BFF over his new BFF, but simply Scratch choosing to be brave and live the life he always wanted deep down instead of continuing to run away/hold himself back.

As for what could be seen as the Most controversial bit - Scratch forgetting his time as a ‘ghost’ - I feel like this was incredibly well crafted too. Like anything else in TGAMM (and as Molly herself says) there’s still that spark of hope hinting at Scratch still remembering Molly and the impact she had on him. He’s going to live with those memories and the importance she gave to enhappifying in his heart, even when he doesn’t consciously remember these things.

What’s more, the show also subtly but beautifully emphasizes that even if Scratch won’t fully remember Molly and the others until he’s officially died, the time he spent and the things he did for others as a ghost still mattered - they’re still going to be remembered by Molly, the McGees and their friends, and I LOVE how they also brought back Scratch’s silly toboggan-sneeze curse as just another way a part of ghost-him is going to stick with all of them no matter what - no matter how far apart they are.

While I would have liked one final song (which, I guess we arguably did get that in the credits) I also feel like ending the show on Libby’s Maya Angelou quote was the perfect summation on the show’s core themes - to not just do good for others, but for yourself. To live your best and happiest life.

In my opinion, this truly was just a master class in satisfying series finales. We didn’t need any big final battles or a ton more drama, just one last beautiful character piece that isn’t afraid to be somewhat bittersweet in order to fully sell its message while also still being just as fun and enjoyable and lovely as the rest of the series.

Really, the only thing that makes me kinda sad is that Scratch never said goodbye to GhostShark - but hey, he’ll see him again eventually, and honestly my hc is that the Jeoffs are taking care of Sharkie for him in the meantime. Other than that, this was a 10/10 finale for me, absolutely no notes.

Now… obviously this was the finale that the TGAMM crew was always leading up to, I assume once they realized that they weren’t getting a s3 they asked Disney to give them one final ep to wrap things up. If that wasn’t the case though and this was always meant to be the s2 finale, I guess s3 would be about Todd slowly remembering his life as Scratch and eventually coming back to Brighton alongside Adia to help Molly stop Jinx’s revenge or whatever. But… eh, I personally don’t think that’s needed.

I think the show ended perfectly, leaving just enough ambiguous for fans to still imagine how Molly and Scratch’s adventures are going to continue one day while at the same time being super satisfying - probably the best series finale that we’ve seen out of any modern Disney cartoon.

[onyourhyuck]

MRS NA? | NA JAEMIN. | PART FOUR.

— Prologue: “I’m not your servant, I’m your wife Jaemin.” + “Okay, I sense I may have said this wrongly to you.”

— Summary: Wherein Go Yeeun wakes up from a coma and meets Na Jaemin claiming to be her husband and have five children together.

— Genre: jaemin series. Romance. Found family. Mystery. Smut. Crack. Fluffiness.

— Notes: THIS IS A JAEMIN SERIES ON MY BLOG. reblog and follow me for more daily updates.

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Go Yeeun walks down the plains of the farm. The animals were groomed and dressed into newer coats. The different hairbrushes for the horses had to be used which took longer than doing a simple hairstyle for yourself. Taking care of a farm alone was no joke a very hard job and task. Many of the animals were very important and so Yeeun had no choice but to take care of them, because her lovely husband who works a 9 to 5 job couldn’t do that. Yeeun doesn’t remember anything to say to Jaemin. She doesn’t know if she actually agreed to these chores, to do them. But she took a wild leap and believes her so called husband.

Was he even a husband at this point? Yeeun has been stuck for two months trying to regain her memories of Jaemin and the five children. Nothing came to mind. Sometimes her dreams feels like a puzzle more than a dream with no meaning.

At this point the young woman feels so misplaced. Like a red wine bottle placed between two beer aisles. She feels like a stuck out sore thumb that you can point out in a second. Something about this place doesn’t feel like home. This place feels new and foreign to Yeeun.

And she cannot believe she chose a life like this? I mean a farm? Chores all day? Take care of children all the freaking time and when the kids go to sleep, Yeeun has to deal with an emotionally unavailable husband who barely makes an effort to understand her? This life sounds far from perfect. Far from normal. Far from what Yeeun believes she would have wanted in the past before her memories were erased from her mind.

Opening the backyard door, the young with the black long hair stuck in a messy bun wearing rain boots and overalls sweating from head to toe because she was doing everything to make the animals happy and all fed and cleaned, the overalls had stains of mud and reeking of cow’s straws from the hay. Not expecting anyone to be home. Yeeun’s round beautiful shaped eyes resembling a diamond nearly widen at the sight of the man with a slight tone and muscular build in the kitchen making himself a hot coffee. He wore a reddish and white flannel with crossed squares, a white tank top that make his muscular chest and pecs visible at times.

As much as Yeeun was shocked she was slightly confused too. Why was he back so early? He only left three hours ago.

The woman takes off the boots and then comes forward watching him sip the warm coffee. “What are you doing here back so early?” Yeeun questions with an eyebrow raise and he looks back seeing that Yeeun was already finished with her chores. He smirks raising his eyebrows at the question. “Oh hey bunny lips.” He smirks twirling around like a jelly bean with his body.

Jaemin leans against the counter as his eyes watch Yeeun’s figure. She looks slightly exhausted from doing chores all morning until afternoon. It makes him become smug as he saw Yeeun sit down with a groan as she looks at him.

He turns around when Yeeun was waiting for his answer clearly and he opens his mouth. “Ah. I’m just so good at my work that I finished early. Aren’t i a good husband my darling wife?” The tone he used was somehow mocking and a bit condescending.

Yeeun frowns but doesn’t say anything. She already feels slightly annoyed at him since the last time. They haven’t really spoke much. Not like they had much to talk about unless it’s about children. “Right…” Yeeun trails as she sighs. “Why don’t you help around the house then if you’re so good at your job?” She now blasts an invitation to Jaemin, that wasn’t so much of an invitation.

She is tired of doing chores all the freaking time. Jaemin should take some responsibilities around this household too.

His expression fell down. “But Yeeun that’s your job.” He expressed with an obvious hint that he won’t be doing that since it’s meant to be ‘hers’ to do and not Jaemin’s end of the deal.

The woman wasn’t pleased with the answer and any minute now Yeeun feels the boiling pent up rage inside her stomach aching and screaming to come out and tell her so called husband off right now. Yeeun would’ve divorced him by now, just saying she would’ve picked those papers up in a heartbeat. But Yeeun was thinking about the children and so she didn’t do that; the children matter the most. So Yeeun feels only more and more angry and frustrated at Jaemin’s lack of responsibility.

Yeeun slants upwards on the chair at the table as she takes off the boots now, with a stomp on the ground now. It’s clear that her body was showing anger but her voice was silent. He could imagine fire burning on her eyes whenever Yeeun looks at him.

It is also slightly misogynistic isn’t it? Yeeun is a woman so why is she doing the womanly house chores in the house? Surely Jaemin is a bit more modern than that considering his not so-fatherly acting decisions.

“Look are you here to just come and go? You’re meant to be here in this house too and as long as you’re living here you should do some chores around to help.”

There was a moment for their eyes to make contact. Jaemin stares at the woman telling him now this as she’s staring back at him unamused by how his blank eyes were slightly different than before. He looks like he didn’t want to help at all but when Yeeun phrased it like this he feels like he has no choice but to do it? He just never did a single chore in his life. Jaemin opens his mouth to say something but nothing came out so he closed it, and he raised his finger and puts it back down when his lips sealed. Yeeun’s voice comes off as a tired and annoyed sigh.

“I’ll be fair on you. You can wash the dishes on Saturdays and Sundays. And you can also do the laundry on those days too.”

Really? Jaemin couldn’t believe it you’re seriously giving him chores to do on his alone time! On his weekend where he doesn’t have to go to work. It’s the only time he can relax without the children wanting his attention too. And usually he would be at the bar or hanging out with his friends too.

He gave a slight frustrated fake smile at his wife. “Yeeun can you be slightly more lenient on me? I work. I want my alone time too.”

“Funny. I want my alone time too but I don’t get any at all.” Yeeun shot back and Jaemin felt his brain shutting instantly down. Fair enough, it looks like Yeeun has him cornered.

Hands running through his hair as he stares back at Yeeun and he gives her a slight nod as he sits down now in front of Yeeun as they’re at the table watching their faces. He was staring at her as he spoke now with a perusal sweet smile. “Alright how about just Saturday and i clean the dishes.” Jaemin now asked with both of his eyebrows turning up raised, as his voice was clearly trying to convince and change Yeeun’s decisions.

But she was too stubborn and Yeeun wasn’t the type of woman to fall for Jaemin’s tricks from getting away from doing his own chores. Yeeun was fair considering she does everything around here so it was fair. Jaemin was just avoiding her and her demands as his wife.

She leans forward and slams her hands in front of the table shaking it a bit which then flinched Jaemin as he wasn’t expecting Yeeun to really be this commanding and close to his face when shaking that table that held their elbows together on it. “I’m not your servant, I’m your wife Jaemin.”

Yeeun’s words echo in his ears. She feels more like a servant than a wife right now, and Jaemin’s eyes widen a little.

He groans a bit back at her words but he was now truly feeling like there’s no way he can get out of this now. Jaemin sighs.

“Okay, I sense I may have said this wrongly to you.” Jaemin replies to her as he looks at Yeeun again and he finally nods, without much choice, he doesn’t like this at all. “I’ll do the chores on Saturdays and Sundays.”

He then adds quickly causing Yeeun’s expression to falter downwards. “But on one condition.”

Yeeun has a bad feeling now that he’s saying one condition, and she can only think of bad things right now. “What condition will that be?” She sighs.

Yeeun’s expecting the worst.

He smirks leaning closer. “I take you on a date how about that?”

She furrows her eyebrows. “Why a date?” This was very sudden and somehow when Jaemin always suggests something there will always be some weirdly suspicious motive behind it all. Yeeun can’t help but shake this off.

He hums a bit. “Do I need a reason to take my wife on a date away from the kids?” He now stated and it makes Yeeun silent.

He had a point and she has no comeback to say to counter this so Yeeun trails quietly. “Have we went on a date before then?”

There was a little silence as Jaemin smirks and leans closer nodding. “Oh yeah. We did before once. You can tell how that went.” He states with a flirtatious laugh and smile as he’s now suggesting something completely different.

What did he mean? Yeeun thought.

“How did that date go?” She said confused and Jaemin found it surprisingly very innocent reaction of hers. He leans a bit closer and wraps one arm around Yeeun as he shifts her weight and chair to move even closer towards him where he sat in the chair. His playful eyes never leave Yeeun’s confused and curious eyes. It’s clear that she has no clue, and of course she has no clue.

She has no memories. No recollection. It just makes this more or so funny for Jaemin.

When their faces are even closer he whispers to Yeeun’s ears. “How do you think we made Yongsoo, bunny lips?”

The heart raced like crazy. The eyes widen like sweats coming down the Iris pupils. She grew redder on her complexion now and Yeeun snaps away from Jaemin as she scowls now. “Oh god do you have to say this to me?” Yeeun complained, it was unpleasant and it made her flustered. Embarrassed.

Jaemin on the other hand was loving her reactions. He just loves it when she rejects him so equivalently to how much she’s squeamish at the thought too.

It only takes more for Jaemin to throw in a baby-making joke there and there to have his wife Yeeun leaving him alone.

“You asked. Don’t be complaining to me.” Jaemin smirks as he looks back at Yeeun caressing some of the strands behind her ears.

He took a moment to admire her red cheeks. Somehow she has a feeling there’s a bigger motive behind his ‘date’ he’s asking her to go on right now. “So is that a yes then?” He now asked her again with a playful smile. “Don’t leave your husband hanging here, Yeeun.” He sweetly adds.

She groans mentally. Yeeun looks at him with a flat expression between her eyebrows and eyes. “Okay I guess we can go on a date.”

“Perfect. Thank you, Darling. Get ready because we are leaving at 6.” Jaemin remarks standing up and leaving the kitchen which makes Yeeun widen her eyes.

She wasn’t expecting it to be this quick? Now she’s left thinking what was his whole deal with this deal thing. They really haven’t been communicating much to be going on a date despite having children together. Yeeun sighs. This is going to be a long day.

The children were all rousing up at their father when they now were told they won’t be home with Yeeun or him. They were shocked at first. Haewon, the cute little girl with two braids holding her bunny plushie was the first one to speak out with a pout clearly not liking this. “Awh I want mommy. I don’t want uncle Jeno. He’s not fun at all. He thinks he’s funny like Kevin Hart.”

Oh wow how awkward Jaemin thought, he wonders what his best friend has told his children last time when telling a joke considering they all find him extremely unpleasant right now, or maybe they want their mother so bad they don’t want anyone else right now. Usually the boys like Jeno when they get babysat by his friend.

But now? Yeeun completely changed them. Jaemin was left there trying to make his children calm down and not be so disappointed. He didn’t expect the children to be so attached to Yeeun but hey, they are and they really look up to her so much.

“Dad can you take Jeno on the date instead? Mommy can stay with us.” Insu the one with the slight wispy lips on his words whenever he talks now said tugging on Jaemin’s wrist.

Jaemin laughs a little. “Come on what will me and Jeno do on a date if we go together? Anyways we won’t take too long.” He said now as he would huddle the kids as he kneels down. “Be good to Jeno, kids, and I mean it.” When he brought them in a circle to tell them the rules again. He was serious with them now and he spoke with intentions of not having them repeat what they did last time to Jeno…

He starts to list their mischievous pranks they always do and get in trouble for when they get babysat.

“No paper bombs.”

“No filling the water tub until it overflows.”

The boys whine when he said no more pranks with the bathtub. Hanuel was enjoying that one, especially when it was his idea. Despite being the eldest he was a genius at pranks.

Jaemin looks back at Insung, the twin with the wider cute ears sticking out. He flicks his son’s ears warning. “And that counts no playing with fire, Insung. I mean it.”

The boy nods slowly, he looks disappointed when his father said no to fire. Jaemin really doesn’t know how these kids came up with these ideas.

“Alright. Be good kids. Mommy and i will come back home soon.” Jaemin said now and the front door revealing their mother coming out wearing a new outfit that they never once saw on their mother before. She looks more dressed up and she even put on makeup?

Haewon gasps wowing first as behind Jaemin Yeeun was walking outside the house. “Whoa mommy you look so pretty.” Her daughter exclaims and she was literally eyeing her mother as if Yeeun was like a real life-doll.

The eldest boy Hanuel and the twins Insu and Insung were watching their mother with a jealous eye. Why did their mom go with their dad? She was meant to be with them watching their new episode of their cartoon show on tv!

Yongsoo was already crying. “Mommy nooooo nooo don’t goooo.”

The children didn’t want their mother to go and have fun with their dad because let’s be honest, they love Yeeun too much to let her go right now and their attachment issues? Are severally attached. They like Jeno but they can’t compare him to their amazing mother who does everything for them. She knows everything they like. Meanwhile Jeno doesn’t know anything except bad jokes and he ends up getting pranked by them.

The last time Jeno actually babysat them, he woke up ducktaped in the pig pens. He spent the next hour that day with the pigs, his entire body covered in the grey thick duck tape. And the kids were all making a mess at home too with the freedom they had back then.

Yeeun was surprised to see her children so unhappy and it somehow made her heart beat so much. She gives them a loving smile all and hugs them all in a crowding manner and a huddle. “Oh you guys, I’ll be back soon and I promise when I come back I’ll buy you your favourite ice lollies on the way yeah?” The children seem a little more obedient and happy with that deal.

The two men, Jeno and Jaemin now make eye contact as they try not to smile too much. Jaemin has to give it to Yeeun. She has found a bond with the children he couldn’t do at all. Yeeun was so good with them now.

And not to mention how beautiful Yeeun looks right now Jaemin found his eyes stuck on Yeeun. The short sleeve top with slight pale-ish green colour really goes well with that milky soft complexion. The little handbag strand on her arms and the long flared jeans with the boots? It was definitely an outfit that he likes. It shows off every curve and every beautiful detailing Yeeun so much.

Yeeun sighs and looks at Jaemin who she saw staring at her in a very obvious and different manner and direction.

“What?” Yeeun blurts out confused, she looks down at her outfit and then back at her husband. “Do I have something on my face?” She half panics and Jaemin shakes his head. “No, no,”

He clears his voice. “Nothing. I was zoning out.” He brushed away the own thoughts of Yeeun looking beautiful. “Get inside the car Yeeun, we gotta go.” The woman was brought to reality and she nods getting inside the passenger car.

The car clicks and she looks out the window waving at the five children. “You sure your friend can handle them?” Yeeun would ask looking at the driver seat where her husband was sitting now starting the engine with the key in the car hole and they soon drive off slowly leaving the farm and their house property. The drive in their town roads were slowly coming into view and Jaemin let’s out a soft laugh at Yeeun’s question. He trusts Jeno. They went through high school, through kindergarten. They were friends since they were very small at this point Jaemin would put his life on the line for Lee Jeno.

With one hand Jaemin would drive the steering wheel on the car turning round the corner while his left hand was now moving forward to hold Yeeun’s hand softly. He looks back at her for a second only because he needed all his attention on the road as he was driving. “Don’t worry about them being okay, yeah? Jeno is someone I trust with all my heart. He will take good care of them until we go home.”

The hand contact was something new it made Yeeun’s heart race as she saw their hands touching now a lot longer than a second too. She sighs. Jaemin was right this was a date and not a worrying therapy session about her children. “You’re right. So where are you taking me then? Some fancy restaurant?” Yeeun smirks guessing.

She hopes it’s a fancy restaurant where she can have steak or something like that. It would be a perfect date in her book. If Yeeun had to pick. The steak and wine combination for a date at a fancy eloquent restaurant would be an amazing date to go with Jaemin at.

The mention of a fancy restaurant makes Jaemin laugh and shake his head, he was amused to say the least that his wife has high expectations. Well. He’s about to lower them and say goodbye to a fancy restaurant idea. “Oh no no darling. No fancy restaurant.” He smirks.

“I’ll be taking you somewhere more fun and traditional bunny lips.” He smirks wiggling his eyebrows forward which makes Yeeun already think something so bad.

She shouldn’t be having negative thoughts but the way Jaemin was lowering her expectations of what their date was gonna be like. Well. Yeeun was seated in the far tightly as she lets her husband drive them to the secret location.

The drive to the place Jaemin was taking Yeeun to was a bit far from their home but not that far if you don’t walk. By far it was a decent drive. He would come out of the car and Yeeun opens her car door by herself. She wasn’t even sure why she expected Jaemin to open the car door for her, he was walking ahead and when he saw behind that the woman was not following he yells in front motioning a waving hand at her to follow him. “Come on, we can’t miss this tickets!” He yells.

‘Ugh he can’t even open the door and wait for me?…’ Yeeun sighs in her head thoughts.

The area they lived in was always the countryside and almost kinda poor-like with working class. So when she starts to walk following Jaemin behind who bought their fair tickets. It was like an open fair that opened up today. He took her to a local fair with many running games available to do. They walk side by side and Yeeun’s eyes widen at how many rides there was too.

It wasn’t something Yeeun expected, that’s for sure.

He saw her expression searching everything she’s seeing as if getting information where she was at. Jaemin smirks and grabs her hand now. “Come on, don’t get lost. Take my hand.” The man lead her and Yeeun let’s him taking her hand as they held hands while walking amongst other people.

Somehow the warmth in her heart grew when Jaemin was holding her hand so tight leading her to a certain stand where it caught her attention. They were selling all sorts of prizes if you manage to shoot the running duck toys on the wall with the shotgun that has pebbles in it.

Yeeun raised an eye at one of the prizes. It was a a bracelet made up of string but it had a little gemstone in the middle, it was something the young woman noticed first.

Her husband looks at Yeeun and stands behind her to see what she was watching so intensely. “Ah you want the arm bracelet, Yeeun?” Jaemin smirks and he thinks it’s an easy one way job to get for her right now.

He didn’t waste a second but motions to the stand owner. “One shot gun. I want that bracelet up there as the prize. How much do I need to shoot?” The stand owner looks back at the prize and then looks back at Jaemin. “Five ducks.”

‘Five… there’s no way he can manage to shoot five ducks right?’ Yeeun wasn’t sure actually. She can’t remember if he was good at shooting or if he knew how to work it out.

When staring at the man grabbing the shotgun and getting it ready with a proper aim at the running ducks on the walls. It’s like goose hunting. He was chasing the ducks with the aim trying to get one. He was silent and focused when Yeeun was watching him and it feels almost intense right now. Even the owner of the stand was now watching Jaemin with not much expectations.

But even if no one was believing in him. Jaemin shown no fear and no mistakes. The shotgun runs up and he ends up getting the first duck. It struck so quickly that when Jaemin reloads the shotgun it makes Yeeun’s eyes widen trying to make sense of how quick the pebbles were shot at the duck.

He got one, and that one duck turned into four other ducks as he manages to shoot all five remaining ducks to win the bracelet prize.

Jaemin smirks as he takes the bracelet and puts the shotgun back. He then whistles approaching Yeeun on the side. “What’s with the surprised look?” He laughs a bit seeing Yeeun pale as she wasn’t expecting her husband to be so good at aiming with a shotgun.

“I didn’t know you knew how to shoot?” Yeeun said back with a laugh. Jaemin’s smirk never leaves his face as his big round eyes and his long fluttering eyelashes poke at Yeeun’s expression when taking a step forward holding out her arm. The softness of his touch makes her heart race so much more prominently; and his breath was deep as Jaemin’s soft still eyes looking down at her wrist as he tied the bracelet on her wrist finally. “There is a lot of things you don’t remember about me, bunny lips.” Jaemin’s deep and low voice spoke with a smirk as Yeeun looks up at him taking back her wrist when he was done putting on the bracelet.

There was silence between them but Yeeun and Jaemin were brought back to reality when the smell of food passing the fair streets makes her stomach tingle. The growling sound makes Yeeun feel slightly exposed.

She completely forgot to eat earlier today. Jaemin looks at Yeeun with a soft laugh when seeing her become slightly shocked to hear her stomach make such a loud sound. “Hmm, hungry Yeeun?” He grins and she looks at Jaemin with an eye roll. “No, I’m starving.” She emphasised.

There was Yeeun again, with her little eye rolls thrown at his words as he asks the most obvious questions. They begin to walk somewhere more quiet. The fair was getting quite busy the later it gets and so on. Jaemin didn’t really want to eat dinner filled with crowds. And he most certainly prefers some alone time too with Yeeun. It’s a luxury to be alone like this after all. They might as well make most of it.

There was the coastal sea and the brick walls that you can watch the sea crashing against. Yeeun puts her handbag down on the brick wall as she leans with her elbows forward watching the ocean waves crashing down, back and forward, upwards. It sounded so magical to be close to the sea like this and Yeeun closed her eyes inhaling the air.

It feels so cold and refreshing. It makes Yeeun’s body feel so much better. Currently she was alone waiting for someone to come back. Jaemin told her he’s getting food so he told her to wait here for him until then.

When Yeeun was wondering where the man could’ve gotten lost Jaemin appears behind her and leans on the brick wall. He takes out a foiled food. Yeeun was expecting something cleaner, less greasy. The sight of the filled up sandwich with chopped up meat and melted cheese makes Yeeun salivate but also, she wasn’t expecting to be eating greased up meat and cheese.

Jaemin hums taking a bite of the sandwich too. “Here you take a bite you’re hungry aren’t you?” She scowls and shakes her head. “I’m good, you eat up. I’ll eat at home.”

The words she said makes Jaemin smirk as he took another bite and puts the sandwich under Yeeun’s nose which makes her smell how good it actually was. She was just stubborn to want to take a bite out of something that’s greasy and more un-healthy in her eyes.

“Come on, Bunny lips. Don’t be stubborn. One bite?” Jaemin urgently said as he watches her fighting her inner urges and conflict.

Yeeun murmurs. “No I’m fine, not hungry anymore. Looks unpleasant.”

But the moment her eyes were watching the sandwich Jaemin takes a bite out again she couldn’t help but gulp. Her hungry stomach was growing more hungry watching Jaemin eat and she slowly comes closer.

“Fine. Give me one bite…” Yeeun trails as Jaemin smirks giving her the sandwich in the foil paper. When he saw the girl take a bite out of the sandwich it fills his loving eyes on her. He loves seeing Yeeun try the food he eats only.

It’s something he’s used to. Yeeun wasn’t so used to this kind of food, but when he saw her obvious reaction it was clear that she loved it. The moment the bite she took from the sandwich Yeeun let’s out a soft moan and nods as she ate. “Mhmm…” It was clear that his wife loved it, and she was wrong about this food. Jaemin smirks. “Is it good?”

She gulps down chewing the sandwich, she takes another bite going back for seconds, it makes Jaemin almost proud he introduced Yeeun to some good culture over here. “Oh god how come i didn’t find this earlier?”

Yeeun exclaims.

He chuckles and he motions his hands to the sandwich. “Let me take a bite too—“ Yeeun moves her hands away and she shakes her head. Jaemin laughs as she moved away. “Okay okay you eat up, it’s good you’re eating.” He states giving up. It’s obvious she won’t be sharing as it’s too good to her right now. Like a new addiction probably.

Yeeun and Jaemin turn to the ocean view as it was nighttime with a cold breeze running against them and their clothes. She finished eating the sandwich now but Jaemin and Yeeun continue to watch the waves crashing.

“Hmm did you ever travel, Jaemin?” Yeeun asked the man and he softly smiles. “No, but I wish I did.” He sighs.

“Many people born in these deprived areas don’t have the money to travel.” Jaemin started to state the facts. The poor people stay poor.

Yeeun looks at Jaemin softly and she gives him a gentle smile as her hands brush over his hand intertwining their fingers together. Somehow holding hands became natural today. They never held hands before until today.

“Someday we can travel. I’ll make it a promise.” Yeeun softly said to him. She spoke in a soft spoken tone that Jaemin couldn’t even imagine to hear from her ever.

It was different. They’re now speaking openly with softness. It wasn’t like before at all.

Jaemin’s eyes watch Yeeun’s as she said that she would make this come true for him and it made his lips seal together in a thin line.

Sometimes he can feel this invisible thread pulling him towards her heart even more.

The pull, the rough drag, the urge to kiss Yeeun too. Deep inside beneath his harden skin and his high iron walls Jaemin keeps up, there was this heavy heavy gravity of Yeeun’s words resting at the end pit.

And it’s changing him very slowly, breaking at the iron walls he keeps on.

Their bodies were still but Jaemin’s head tilts on the side and softly moves closer letting their lips touch softly. The kiss feels like standing on top of the finest silk or on top of a cloud. Yeeun’s eyes closed and Jaemin’s hands brushed up on her face caressing his thumbs down her cheeks, deepening their soft kiss, she feels the hitching breath stop and her cheeks growing warmer.

The sound of their lips leaving, it was like a wet soft small sound between them that their kiss made when it came off. Jaemin looks down at Yeeun and he slowly brings his hands down her face, admiring how beautiful Yeeun looks tonight.

“I want to apologise for you know…not helping around the house and for not being there for the kids.” Jaemin trails awkwardly. He wasn’t the best at making apologies but it was his goal to give one to Yeeun.

Yeeun was the most shocked though. An apology from Jaemin?

Perhaps Jaemin was changing, Yeeun thought. “Thank you, Jaemin…”

Meanwhile back at home the children were having the time of their lives with their uncle Jeno. But it must be the opposite for their uncle right now, because this feels like utter hell on earth.

Jeno was tied against the stairway railings now with his hands handcuffed by dog leads. One of the children, he can’t remember who, managed to tie his hands with dog leashes!

“Whoever tied me come untie me! Your parents will be hearing about this.” Jeno warns as he sighs, he wishes judgement day came and took him now because he can’t deal with babysitting five rotten devils.

Hanuel the eldest was watching tv with a tub of ice cream and a large spoon. “Uncle Jeno you should really stop shouting, it’s pointless.” Hanuel smartly suggests.

“Be glad you’re not stuck with the pigs like last time.” The older boy said again with a smirk as Hanuel went back to eating the ice cream.

Jeno wants to roll his eyes at the boy’s smart-ass attitude. This kid is meant to be the oldest but why was he the meanest?

Then the twins, those twins were making a mess in the kitchen playing with pots and pans. They rattle and rattle everywhere. Meanwhile their older sister Haewon was trying to bake a cake right now. She’s making the cake batter.

‘Oh how brilliant,’ Jeno thought. Jaemin and Yeeun are having the time of their lives but back home it was chaos running wild like a spreading fire.

Then Jeno’s thoughts stop when Yongsoo was by the top of the stairs with a skateboard. The youngest boy was there ready to roll over with a skateboard down thinking it’s going to be a smooth ride, but Jeno was there in the way and he will be crashed into.

“Oh… Yongsoo! No! Don’t slide down.” Jeno shouts but he came too late to warn the boy as he rolls down with a skateboard and crashed into Jeno’s back knocking Jeno out cold while Yongsoo was sliding down with a little ‘Weeeeeeeee’ happy sound coming out of the boy’s lips.

Jeno will never be babysitting here again, even if Jaemin paid him like this time! He won’t do it again!

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Sorry this took so long, chapter 5 is coming out this week too!! I decided to release 2 parts this week because I was very far behind this series </33

@onyourhyuck please refer from translating copyrighting and plagiarising my work thank youu! Reblog this fic and follow me for more updates on my blog this is a series!

[understand-that-i-love-you-not]

"Cold? Dragon Young"

[Context, visiting Dan Heng's room to offer affection, though he seems...oddly busy]

"Come in"

Out of the blue you come in on the archives commonly where your boyfriend resides at the express. You come opening the door, not finding it necessary to knock, he would hear your footsteps ahead of your action.

You enter to see Dan Heng working on the data bank. He seems to just be standing, posture straight. arms tucked in front with one raising to support his chin, a habitual action when you're in deep thinking.

You felt rather silly, so you proceeded to hug him abruptly from behind

"Hello" was all you muttered while your face was planted on his clothed back, taking this opportunity to relish his scent, especially he's got his long-lengthen coat undressed, leaving him on his black long sleeves.

His body forces forward to your impact then immediately regaining posture. He seems unfazed

You then move your palms from his stomach, trailing them in a slow but very intimate motion, up and down. Still he stays at where and what he was.

You stopped your hands at the top of his shoulders, shaking his whole body a little as if telling him you were in the room. What was it he was busy with anyway? was it so important he has to put you aside at the moment??

You got a bored so you proceeded to leave him be for a moment, walking out. Maybe he is busy right now.

Before you could leave he grabbed your wrist.

"Come look at this"

He led you to the data bank that had his spotlight earlier. Happily you complied.

"I was just imprinting these on the data bank when we got back from Jarilo IV"

From the data bank it showed slide shows of photographs of your memories from when you were trailblazing the said planet.

"Ohh..." was all you could mutter in a descending, adored tone.

"Look! this was when March tripped and got ice cream on Stelle's face!! haha...and that's us in the background..."

"Oh this was...when we sneaked a small stroll out of boulder town when we were supposed to be on the hotel....hehe, luckily Stelle didn't see us when she went with Bronya and Seele. Honestly! it took a while for me to convince you to walk with me"

"It was too risky...we were luckily the lot didn't see us" Dan Heng added "I couldn't sleep you know~"

You stood silent...in awe of special moments you all shared at your adventure, and of you and your lover's

During your observation, you felt arms snake around your waist.

It was Dan Heng's turn to offer you the same attention you did for him just now. This action made heat crept to your cheeks, and sending fluttering butterflies to your stomach.

This...isn't fair...how come he can make you feel this way but when you did it to him he didnt budge at all?!

As a 'comeback' you jokingly and mischievously planned.

You proceeded to turn to face him.

You snake your arms to cling on his neck, forcing your head forward to place your soft lips on his sweet ones.

This shocked Dan Heng, his eyes remained on shock, his arms now levitating on your body, unable to move.

You pulled your lips away by a few centimeters, which you stared at before completely distancing you face to look at his.

Dan Heng was back from his brain circuit to stare at your eyes, still in a shock and his lips were slightly parted.

You keep staring at him, asking him if you can continue.

He softened his gaze, then stared to your lips "Why did you stop?"

You wasted no time and kissed him again, this time he reciprocated. It was very intimate, he seemed like he really needed you at this moment. Your body slowly leaning backwards due to Dan Heng's strong arms caging your waist, all the while he leans his upper body on you to feel your lips more. You understood what he wanted. You both slightly parted your lips, your hand reaching for his cheek while his supported your neck.

You pulled away, catching for breathe

Dan Heng didn't know what to say, he felt a little embarrassed after unintentionally heavying his body weight to yours.

You chuckled "I'm tired...we should go rest, we had quite the adventure no? mind if I stay for the night?"

Dan Heng looked down with red tinted cheeks "of course, my bed's not all the comfort you would look for though"

"That's alright, the bed is not that I mind, it's you that I want to be with in my sleep"

Dan Heng looks down, then faced you to place a kiss on your forehead...

[arundhatimorningstar]

maid of honor | bradley bradshaw

The pre-wedding dinner for the groomsmen and bridesmaids was in full swing, and the lively chatter of guests filled the air. Y/N, adorned in a sundress, was helping with some logistics when Y/F/N, the bride, approached her with a mischievous grin.

"Y/N, I have a surprise for you," Y/F/N said, excitement dancing in her eyes.

Y/N raised an eyebrow, intrigued. "A surprise? What is it?"

Before she could receive an answer, Y/F/N turned towards the entrance of the hall and called out, "Bradley, come here for a moment! I want you to meet someone special."

Bradley, the best man and one of Bob's closest friends, looked puzzled but followed her lead. Bob was a friendly and easy-going guy who had always become friends with all of Y/F/N's friends, and Y/F/N had befriended all of his as well.

Moments later, Bradley entered the room, and Y/N felt her heart skip a beat. Her breath caught in her throat as she locked eyes with him after all these years. Bradley's surprise mirrored hers, and they stood there, momentarily frozen in time.

"Bradley, meet Y/N Y/L/N, the maid of honor and one of my dearest friends," Y/F/N introduced with a genuine smile.

Y/N's heart raced as she tried to regain her composure. She wasn't prepared to face Bradley again, especially not in this unexpected manner. The memories of their high school days flooded back, both sweet and bittersweet.

Bob, who had walked over to his fiancèe, seemed to sense the tension between Y/N and Bradley, but he played it off as excitement for the wedding. "Now, let me introduce you to Bradley," he said, turning to Bradley. "Y/N, this is Bradley Bradshaw, one of my closest friends and the best man."

Y/N's eyes darted between Bob and Bradley, and she managed a slightly nervous smile. "Hi, Bradley. It's nice to meet you again."

Bradley's heart pounded in his chest as he replied, "Hi, Y/N. It's been a while."

Bob and Y/F/N excused themselves, citing "important engaged people business", leaving the two of them standing awkwardly in each other's presence. It was as if time had transported them back to their high school days when shyness and unspoken feelings stood between them.

Y/N decided to break the ice, feeling the need to say something. "So, you're the best man? That's a big responsibility."

Bradley chuckled softly, relieved that she initiated the conversation. "Yes, it is. But I couldn't say no to Bob. We've been friends for a while, and, to be honest, no one can say no to Bob." His smile widened at the giggle he elicited out of her.

Their conversation flowed more freely after that, a mix of nostalgia and curiosity about each other's lives after high school. They talked about their studies, careers, and the various experiences that had shaped them over the years.

As the night wore on, Y/N and Bradley found themselves gravitating towards each other, drawn by an inexplicable connection that time hadn't erased. The shock of their unexpected reunion was slowly replaced by the comfort of familiarity.

Bob and Y/F/N watched from a distance, exchanging knowing glances. They had sensed the unspoken feelings between Y/N and Bradley, and they couldn't be happier for the possibility of something rekindling between them because of the two of them.

In that moment, Y/N and Bradley realized that fate had brought them back together for a reason. Their hearts, though hesitant, had never truly let go of what they felt all those years ago.

As the night progressed, they found themselves stealing glances, laughter shared, and subtle touches that spoke volumes. It was a dance of emotions, with both surprise and delight intertwining in their hearts.

Little did they know that this wedding celebration, filled with shock and surprise, would mark the beginning of a new chapter—a chapter where love would find its way, breaking through barriers, and leading them to a love that transcended time and distance, a love that was truly meant to be.

[yenalogyy]

Nakamura Kazuha | Been a while IV

The two arrived at his apartment, as Kazuha seated herself on the cozy sofa in the middle of the room. She glanced around his well-kept place. With a warm smile, she finally spoke, breaking the silence, "Looks like you've got yourself quite a neat apartment."

He chuckled, the corners of his lips curling up. "You're just saying that to be polite. I'm sure your place is bigger than mine."

Kazuha shook her head. "No, really! My place is like, half the size of what yours is."

"Then I'll gladly take your compliment," he replied with a grin, feeling at ease in her presence. He fetched two glasses and poured apple juice into them before placing them gently on the coffee table in front of her.

As they sipped their juice, He couldn't help but be curious about her. "Have you met with some of our old friends during your stay?" he asked.

Kazuha sighed wistfully. "I haven't, unfortunately. I haven't even told anyone that I'm going to be here for about a week, since I'll be quite busy taking care of some stuff." She smiled, her eyes reflecting memories of their shared past. "Enough about me, what about you? Are you still in contact with Yunjin-unnie? Chaewon-unnie, perhaps?"

He leaned back, reminiscing. "Well, it's been around two weeks since I last talked with them, and that was about them ranting about their workplaces," he said, rolling his eyes playfully at the thought.

Kazuha giggled, recalling how he had always been the patient listener in their group. "That's just like you. Listening to what they have to say without saying anything, or even asking about anything in return."

"What can I do, right?" He chuckled. "Why don't you ask them to meet up? I can text them if you want to."

"Oh no, you don't have to do that." Kazuha waved her hands, declining his offer. "I can text them myself, though I'm not sure if I'm able to. It's been a long time since I last contacted them."

"Why not? I'm sure they'd drop any schedule they have just to meet you."

Kazuha hesitated, her gaze drifting downwards as she thought about the reason behind her reluctance.

"You know what? I'll text them later," she finally replied, giving a determined nod. "I'll do it once I get home."

"Great," He said with a supportive smile. "So, what were you doing prior to our meeting?"

"Oh, you know, walking around and all. And you?"

"I met up with Han, just catching up with our lives."

As they continued their conversation, He couldn't shake the feeling that something was amiss with Kazuha's visit. He decided to press further onto the matter, sensing that she was avoiding the topics of her activities.

"I'm curious, Zuha-ya. What are you really doing here? Surely it can't be just any holiday since you're busy, right?"

Kazuha's eyes shifted to the right, a subtle sign that he had learned over the years - she was about to tell a white lie. This only fueled his suspicions, and he couldn't help but wonder what she was keeping from him.

Just then, her phone lit up with a call, and she quickly picked it up, hoping he hadn't seen the contact's name on the screen.

"May I use your balcony, Y/N? I have to pick up this call."

"Sure," He replied, though his eyes never left her figure as she walked out onto the balcony. Unfortunately for her, he had caught a glimpse of Chaewon's name on her phone.

Why would she lie about not being in contact with Chaewon?

Not long after, Kazuha returned from the balcony with a somewhat uneasy expression on her face, but she quickly regained her composure when she noticed his curious gaze.

"Everything okay?" He asked, pretending he hadn't seen Chaewon's name on her phone.

Kazuha forced a smile. "Yeah, just a friend checking up on me. Nothing important."

He couldn't shake the feeling that something was amiss, but he decided not to press further. Instead, he changed the topic. "So, about what you're doing during your stay here?”

Kazuha chuckled nervously. "Can we… not talk about that? Please?”

He realized he had been too aggressive earlier about prying into her affairs. He leaned forward, placing a hand on hers. "I'm sorry, Zuha. I didn’t mean to pry into your business like that.”

Her smile returned, this time more genuine. "It's alright, Y/N. I appreciate your concern, but it's just something I can't discuss right now. I promise I'll tell you everything once I can." He nodded, relieved that she wasn't upset with him.

[galaxywhump]

Home Again

Trope: Not Used to Freedom

Fandom: Original Work

[SV-240 masterlist]

[blue for completed]

Timeline: post-captivity, set after Ghosts of the Past.

contents: recovery from slavery whump and forced relationship, hospital setting, childhood trauma, mention of therapy.

~~~

“Jonna Schulte visited me yesterday.”

Nathaniel is looking out the window, so Wren can’t see his expression, but he does notice the tension in his shoulders.

“I know.” Nathaniel’s voice is forced, stiff. “I talked to her.”

“Yeah, I heard you talking.” The emphasis Wren puts on the last word goes unnoticed. “So, what’s the deal with… all that? She didn’t tell me much.”

“We were married, it didn’t work out, so she left.”

Nathaniel spits out his words like they’re poison, as is the topic at large, but Wren doesn’t want to back out. It’s too important, and too confusing.

“She said she didn’t want to abandon me.”

Nathaniel inhales sharply and crosses his arms. “I don’t know what she did or didn’t want. You can ask her.” He finally faces Wren, his gaze like the dark sky before a thunderstorm. “‘I don’t want to talk about this.”

His tone is harsh, and it makes Wren freeze. There it is, the tension he’s felt for so long, his instincts urging him to run, and he feels so small and insignificant, but not in the same way that SV-240 made him feel. He doesn’t feel like a human being confronted with the unimaginable loneliness of being trapped on a distant planet. He feels like a helpless kid.

“I’m sorry,” he mutters, looking away, his heartbeat deafening, his hands shaking.

Nathaniel seems surprised by Wren’s reaction, but he doesn’t add anything. The sense of immediate danger slowly fades, though the implications linger in Wren’s mind.

Nothing has changed. The events of the last two years did not overwrite his earlier memories and instincts, not that he really expected otherwise. What Daniel had put him through made him discover mechanisms within his psyche that he wasn’t aware of before, and which he figures must have come from his childhood. Now he gets to see their root cause with new eyes, and he doesn’t know if he’s ready for it.

Between living alone, struggling with the way his body and mind work now, and going back to living with his father, he’s not sure if there exists an option that isn’t terrible.

“Do you need help packing?”

He nearly jumps in place and shakes his head.

“No, no, I’ll do it myself. It’s not a lot.”

His hands are shaking as he puts what little he’d taken out back in the bag and zips it up.

As much as he wanted to leave the hospital before, now he wishes he could stay.

***

When they exit, there are people waiting for them, a small crowd gathered near the entrance, the sight of which causes Wren to stop abruptly, his eyes going wide. And then there’s noise, voices, and they don’t sound angry, but they’re too overwhelming for Wren to register anything. He stepped out of the hospital and fell into a void, and he’s frozen in place, gripping the strap of his bag so hard his knuckles turn white.

Someone grabs his arm and pulls, and his immediate reaction is to try and free himself, but when he manages to tear his gaze away from the crowd, he sees it’s just his father, so he forces himself to move, to put one foot in front of the other, to get the hell out, away from those people, everything is too much, too crowded, and it isn’t until he’s seated in the car that he can breathe again.

He exhales and leans forward until he rests his forehead against the back of the front seat, but he has to straighten up when the car starts. He blinks and his gaze flits towards the window, but he has to look away when he sees the crowd again.

“What happened?”

Wren winces. He can feel Nathaniel’s eyes boring into him, but he doesn’t want to look. It’s not like he knows what happened, anyway; for all he knows, he left the hospital building and regained consciousness in the car.

“Sorry,” he says, and Nathaniel doesn’t push, he never does anymore, he only wants uncomfortable conversations to end, and that’s exactly what happens. The drive home passes in silence, and Wren spends its entirety swallowing back tears.

***

Unlike him, the house hasn’t changed at all. It’s still neat, but unremarkable, average in just about every way; Nathaniel never flaunted his position by going for unnecessary luxury. Still gripping the strap of the bag tightly, Wren enters, and the inside is the same too, because it has always been comfortable, and that was enough. There are some new things, things he doesn’t recognize, but they’re minor, they don’t matter.

The door closes behind him, and something about the sound both sobers him up and sends him back to a day he’d rather not reminisce about. He can’t breathe, he can feel tears coming again, and this time he can’t hold them back, so he rushes upstairs, to his old room, which is also the same, the only difference being the boxes strewn about the floor. His things, brought back to the place he had escaped years ago.

He’s home.

Tears overflow and he furiously wipes them away. All he wants to do is sit on his bed and wallow in emotions that he can’t even identify, but he hears his father’s footsteps on the stairs, and he knows he has to appear at least a bit more put-together. He sits down on the bed anyway, unzips his bag, and starts unpacking it.

“Hey,” Nathaniel says after a symbolic knock on the doorframe. “Need any help?”

At first Wren wants to refuse again. These are his things, he can handle unpacking, and having his father here will probably only lead to more tension, more awkwardness, but…

He looks at the boxes. The bag he can handle, but with how he’s feeling he’s not sure the same can be said about the boxes. Besides, if he’s left on his own, he might just burst into tears and accomplish nothing, and his room being a mess will only drag him further into misery.

“Actually, yeah,” he says, looking up from the bag with a slightly forced smile. “I don’t know what I’m going to put where yet, but if you could help with the boxes, that would be great. Just… clothes on one pile, other stuff on a different pile, something like that.”

“Sounds doable,” Nathaniel laughs, and Wren does too, and they get to work, mostly in silence, sometimes making small talk or commenting on their finds.

“You still have this T-shirt?”

“Yeah, it’s living its best life as pajamas now.”

“Mhm. And this one?”

“Pajamas. Or, uh, for cleaning days.”

“This one too?”

“Yeah.”

“There’s a hole in it.”

“Exactly. It’s perfect.”

They laugh, Wren through tears, because of course he’s crying, because he hasn’t seen these things in such a long time, he thought he’d never see them again. There are tears in his breaking voice too, which go unaddressed; it feels absurd, this elephant in the room, his silent breakdown and its cause, but he convinces himself that it’s better this way, that they can both pretend that everything is fine, even when nothing is.

Their conversations are normal, ignoring the context that is anything but. Catching up, how much has the city changed? It must have changed, it’s been… a while. Food. Food is a normal subject. They can get takeout, whatever Wren wants. Not from that one place, though. It closed down a year or so ago. 

It’s strange to think that normal things were happening while he was away. A silly thought, of course he’d never think that everything was put on hold when he was kidnapped, but somehow it still hits him hard. The restaurant closed down, and he was busy being a captive. He doesn’t even know what was going on with his father when he was presumed dead, but he doesn’t want to start that conversation yet; he can ask about it later. Right now he focuses on dividing his clothes into categories with some semblance of sense before putting them in the closet.

The last thing he reaches for is his running T-shirt, and he pauses, holding it up, rubbing the slippery fabric between his fingers.

“I think I’m gonna go for a run,” he says, his idea verbalized as soon as it appears in his mind. Nathaniel, busy collecting the now empty boxes, looks at him with a frown.

“Are you sure it’s a good idea?”

Naturally, Wren starts doubting himself, and maybe it is a stupid idea, but it’s an exciting one, and he doesn’t want to just give it up.

“Yeah, I… think I need it. I miss running.”

“Alright,” Nathaniel says, still seemingly unconvinced. “Now?”

“No.” Wren shakes his head. “I’ll wait until the evening. So it’s less warm.” And, hopefully, so there’s fewer people. He doesn’t say that part out loud. Being concerned about the weather is normal. Freaking out after being one of the only two people on an entire planet is not. He wants to be normal, and if he can’t, he’ll at least pretend.

The food they get from a place Wren knows well tastes different from what he remembers, but maybe he just doesn’t remember it well, it’s been so long, after all. They talk for a bit about nothing in particular, and when the silence threatens to turn awkward, Wren suggests watching something light, maybe a game show, and they do just that, joking and trying to guess the answers before the contestants do. It’s a familiar scenario in a way that fills Wren with unease as time goes on; he’s relieved when evening comes and he can excuse himself to get ready.

Putting up his hair to keep it out of the way and warming up before leaving the house is a routine he hasn’t forgotten, but it’s not as nostalgic and uplifting as it should be, because he used to do this on SV-240 too. Back then it made him feel better, but the price he pays now is that it’s become tainted, linked to memories of running laps around Daniel’s house, of working out alongside him. That, however, is reduced to a triviality when Wren leaves the house and faces the world outside.

Running laps within the safe area around the house, guarded from the dangers of the planet, was one thing; being faced with the startling realization that he can go wherever he wants is something else entirely. He’s no longer confined, be it to the house, the spaceship, or the hospital. He’ll have to go back home eventually, but he’s the one who gets to decide when that will be.

He’s free.

He sways on his feet a little, and has to take a deep breath of Earthly air. For just a moment he considers turning back, going back inside, but above all he feels… excited. Energized. He wants to get the most out of his newfound freedom, so he braces himself, chooses a direction, and starts running, maybe a bit faster than he usually would, and a wave of euphoria the likes of which he hasn’t felt in a long time spreads throughout his body, through his every nerve. His shoes hit the pavement at a steady pace, and his breathing falls into a familiar rhythm. That’s all that matters.

When he comes back home, he’ll have no choice but to face his thoughts. His first therapy session is coming up - how should he approach it? How much can he tell his therapist? He’ll have to bring up something, think about the last two years with Daniel, recall some of the physical torture, because he can’t imagine himself talking about anything other than that, even though it’s the other memories that give him nightmares each and every night. Is he going to have one tonight, in his old room? He doesn’t want his father to hear it. His father… The time they spent together was nice, and Wren knows it’s nothing new, nor was it a one-off. There have always been days like this, filled with casual, lighthearted conversations, joking and laughter, and yet, when he was away, he could only remember the other days, raised voices, disappointment and contempt. He got a reminder of that earlier, Nathaniel’s reaction to his question about Jonna, Jonna, his mother, who didn’t want to abandon him, who’s one message or call away…

He never wants to stop running.

~~~

taglist: @faewhump @inky-whump @whole-and-apart-and-between @whatwasmyprevioususername @procrastinatingsab @funky-little-glitter-bomb @goneuntil @redstainedsocks @luminouswhump @lonesome--hunter @as-a-matter-of-whump @renkocchi @whump-only @muddy-swamp-bitch @girlwithacoolcat @watermelons-dont-grow-on-trees @sophierose002 @whump-headspace @to-whump-or-not-to-whump @kixngiggles @ohwhumpydays @whumpsical @wibbly-wobbly-whump @stab-the-son-of-a @his-unspoken-words @pumpkin-spice-whump @onlyhappywhenitpains @suspicious-whumping-egg @morning-star-whump @burtlederp @there-will-always-be-blood @springwhump

[starsfic]

Punished

So I was re-reading LadyBugOut by @miraculouscontent and I had a thought that occurred to me when I was reading this chapter. In the very next chapter, it's mentioned that people could hear Miss Bustier and Marinette arguing and the class jumping to the latter's defense. It wouldn't surprise me if this got reported to Mr. Damocles, even if said reports didn't come from the class (which some probably did, let's be honest here, someone told their parents).

Caline had been what had been best described as a rough two days.

First had been her attempt at regaining peace in her classroom by asking Marinette, very politely, to delete BugOut, followed by the confrontation by her students. Second had been Ms. Mendeleiev’s rather harsh pointing out of her faults. After all that, Caline had tossed and turned all night, trying to decide what to do.

She wanted to deny that Mendeleiev was right. Her methods had worked for years, after all, at least from what she saw. She wanted to believe that she was wrong. Marinette was just lashing out, acting out, definitely not acting like the wonderful good example Caline knew she could be. But the thought of that brought up the memory of her students’ angry faces and Max’s cold words, and she felt sick to her stomach.

She still wasn’t sure what to do now that she was back in school. She still felt sick, although that might’ve been the lack of sleep in general. Caline glanced up and felt her stomach twist at the sight of her classroom door.

First, she needed coffee. Next, she needed to at least teach for the day and then figure out what to do.

However, her plans were stopped by a clearing of the throat.

Mr. Damocles hovered behind her, staring at her. “Ms. Bustier, can I have a word with you?” He sounded strange, almost angry.

“Oh,” She forced down the twist in her stomach and tried for a smile. “Of course, Mr. Damocles-”

“In private.”

Her stomach twisted even harder but she managed a nod. “Of course, sir.” Hopefully, this wasn’t what she thought it was. Maybe he just wanted her thoughts on something? The school dance was due to come soon and God knew how many emotions rose up during that time.

Damocles led her upstairs to his office. He opened the door for her and Caline stepped inside, sitting down. She faintly tasted bile at the back of her throat as the door shut, and he walked past her to his desk. There, he folded his hands, staring her down.

“May I help you with something?” she had to say then, praying that it wasn’t what she thought it was.

“No.” Mr. Damocles frowned, unfolded his hands, and then refolded them. “Ms. Bustier,” he finally said. “I recently received some reports from students’ parents.” Oh no. “I must note, none are from the parents of those in your class.” He pulled out a folder and set it down. It made a small thunk and Caline felt sweat start to bead up. “However, they are all concerning a fight-”

“I wouldn’t really say it was a fight,” Caline had to speak up then. “I was just trying to-”

“Make Ms. Dupain-Cheng delete a blog that has developed into an important resource?” Damocles flipped open the folder and turned it to her. Caline reached out, flipping through the pages. Through most of them were the words that had come from her:

“I advise that you take it down.”

“I’m positive you could take it down with one click if you had to.”

“The blog itself going down would have the best chance of fixing things. It will make it feel like this whole thing has been a mistake.”

“...I can explain-”

“I must advise you that, if it were more than a simple public blog, I would have to go to the police for this,” And that made her freeze. Mr. Damocles stared at her, his brows furrowed tight, and Caline realized that, no, he was actually angry. “However, as far as I know, BugOut does not have any special government protection. It is, however, an important resource.” His hands clenched tighter together. “That does not even mention that you crossed a line by telling a student what she can and cannot publish on her own social media.”

The sweat rolled down her skin. Was it just her or was it hot in here? “I felt like it was more important to protect my students,” she said, her claim sounding weak even as she said it. “Alya and Lila were being hurt by what it was saying.”

“Was Ms. Dupain-Cheng threatening them? Posting humiliating pictures of them? Doxxing them?” Damocles shook his head. “No. Ladybug was simply posting the truth, as she has the right to do. Her intention was not to harm, but to protect herself.” His brows furrowed tighter and tighter. “Next time, I would consider what it was actually doing before speaking up.”

Caline looked down at that, feeling her face grow hot. “So, am I being punished?” she said, gripping her knees and forcing back the bile in her throat.

“Yes. I want you to apologize to your class, especially Ms. Dupain-Cheng,” Well, that took the choice out of her hands. Something was pushed into her vision, and she looked up. It was a brochure for some kind of training. “This is for a training course on setting boundaries between educators and students,” Mr. Damocles said. “I would recommend you take it.”

Bustier was almost impressed. A few months ago, he would be trying his best to not make waves, at least with Chloe. She just wished it wasn’t aimed at her. “Thank you, Mr. Damocles,” She took the brochure and took in a deep breath. “I… apologize.”

He opened his mouth, probably to say that she didn’t need to apologize to him, but Caline was already up and moving. The sooner she moved, the sooner she got away from his anger.

The sooner she could forget the hot shame that welled up, deep inside.