#and im afraid to be around fandom when or if it does lol

[asgardian--angels]

...prayer circle for izzy hands

[devotion-disorder]

UR ART IS SO PRETTY 😍😍🙏🙏 lT MAKES ME WANNA GOBBLE IT UP

Have any tips? I've been tryna get into drawing but i'm rlly strugglimg 😭

First off THANMKYOU FOR YOUR NICE WORDS....🥺🫶🫶

i'm gonna assume you're asking about advice for people that are just getting started with drawing! Now im not a ~seasoned~ artist or anything, i've only been drawing on-and-off for about 7 ish years? so this is all coming from someone who only approaches art as more of a casual hobby... also if you're asking about more technical/ practical advice then feel free to send another ask because I don't really go into that here lol :p

Honestly, i recall that being a beginner artist was tough, because the gap in my skill level and my expectations seemed so daunting. The hardest part was probably having to motivate myself to keep going even when it's hard to see actual progress and, again, the disappointment in "what I draw does not match what I envision in my head". It's hard and sometimes I question what am I even doing all this for. As of right now I can say that this feeling doesn't ever really go away, just that now I've managed to build a bit more confidence in my stuff.

So how I see it is that it's important to find a way to keep yourself motivated no matter what, so that you have it in you to keep practicing, improving, or at least, to just keep drawing. This is something that is gonna look different for everyone so I think it'd be a good idea to explore yourself what can keep you motivated. I was very lucky in that the people around me were also into drawing and were always really nice and supportive, so they played a huge role in building up my confidence - such that I wasn't afraid to experiment and take risks, which is necessary for learning and getting better.

Another major thing for me is to remember to have fun with art, and understand that as long as I managed to enjoy some parts of the process then I've "succeeded" so to speak, even if I don't like the end results. This still applies now...it's frustrating when something I spent time on doesn't turn out the way I wanted, but at least rendering it was fun and relaxing, so it was still a good use of my time. Its about striking a balance i guess; its important to practice and do fundamentals etc etc but imo its equally important to draw things that will make you want to keep drawing. for some this could be doing fanart, for others it could be original art. Social media and fandom-ry is a whole 'nother can of worms, but I will say that they were helpful to me in keeping me motivated and inspired. so basically its this *taps sign*

anyhow i hope that was helpful,,,,, i hope I didn't come off as preachy because im the last person with any authority to be telling other people about art so it was mostly just my own experience with art...but i think its really just about finding your own rhythm and if you keep at it you will get better...either way GOOD LUCK I BELIVBE IN YOU AND I HOPE YOU HAVE FUN🫶🫶🫶🫶

[voxisdaddy]

ABOUT YOUR AGENT 1 POST. I feel like the recent episode, considering he's seen on a leash. and HEAR ME OUT.

I think hes into pet play.

LIKE ITS RIGHT THERE. He crawls and goes fuzzy in the head and would probably fucking whimper when you called him good boy!

Obedient Pet

It's my new babygirl, Agent One! He can take a seat right next to my other babygirl, Vox <3

Fandom: Helluva Boss

Pairings: Agent One x Reader

Type: Headcanons + Rambles | NSFW

C/TW: NSFW, 18+, MDNI, pet play, breeding kink, Sub!Agent One x Dom!Reader, reader written as mostly Gender-Neutral, kinda short sorry, i call him a 'bitch' at one point IM SORRY

In which Agent One is leashed and is such a good boy!

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ To be honest i can't really say i'm into it but like I'd be down for him lol I can imagine he'd lay on the bed whimpering, eyes threatening to roll to back of his head or throw his head back because of just how good you're riding him but then you tug on the leash to make him look at you

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ I see him being hesitant about it when you first try it. Like okay he's a bottom, that's a hard truth for him to swallow, now a leash? Really? He tries it for the heck of it and my, my, guess who turned into the biggest whimpering bitch?

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Lowkey does not want to try anything else degrading because he's afraid of how far his bottom and sub energy will go. He want's to have some dignity when he leaves the bedroom

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Definitely whimpers at being called a good boy! I feel like it gets to him so easily too. Like he could be making a pot of coffee or whatever and you come up behind him, asking him to make you a cup. He replies, "sure", and as you walk away you give his hip a squeeze with "good boy" whispered in his ear then stalk off. He'd freeze up and nearly drop his mug

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Glances around before speedwalking after you and bringing you into the nearest small private room with a harsh tug. He'd scold you; "we're in public", "you can't do that!", "not here!"

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Becomes a frustrated, flustered mess when you tease him about it; "I barely did anything, sweetheart.", "Are you this worked up already?", "it was one little word~"

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Intrusive thought—can we put a lil collar around it and lightly tug on it when giving him head—?

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Kinda unrelated but I feel like he'd develop a huge breeding kink from being leashed? Something about you tugging on his leash while he fucks into you, I see this man as a submissive top from time to time, gets him going and he can't help but want to push deeper as his end nears. Would beg like, "Can I cum inside? Please please Ill do anything. Let me cum inside please—"

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ And once you give him permission he cums so quickly and pushes as deep as he can go

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Oh and also I feel like he'd need your hand combing through his hair as he gives you head. It's not a want, it's a need. Throw in a couple of "good boy"'s in there and he'll moan as his mind goes fuzzy

This probably wasn't exactly what you were thinking/asking for, I'm sorry!

[tree-obsession]

2.2 SPOILERS!! PROCEED AT YOUR OWN RISK

this is a small lore discussion! mostly speculation and theories- i have not seen leaks about 2.3 plot yet, but i have seen a couple about boothill's character stories, so please keep that in mind!

trigger for mentions of suicide(aventurine) and mega corps(the ipc)

we have to talk about the ending cutscene with aventurine and boothill more! i'll start with my fav parts that no one really has brought up yet:

Aventurine intimidating Boothill after mentioning the guards are out- Boothill sounded so offput and hasty while reassuring him they were just knocked out, and we have to talk about aventurine himself just being intimidating more honestly his glare actually did kind of scare me.

Boothill pointing a gun at aventurine was. well. i'm sorry i did actually laugh at that. boothill i think you should research your targets a bit more honestly that guy is NOT afraid of guns. he fully walked into the nihility and pointed at least one gun at himself, and just got out of his own meticulously-planned suicide. threats of death won't work, sorry. also he has good reason to hate oswaldo schneider as well- threats didn't even have to be used, probably! he would kill him too, probably(revenge arc go go go!!)

the convo between aven and jade was. yeah. why he's betting his life again, i don't know (maybe sarcasm? or it was really just banter?) but it does seem like the two of them aren't super close at all, at least from what little i could gather. also if diamond hurts aventurine the entire fandom will kick his ass, emanator or no, so he better be prepared for that too lol. also, it was a pretty common theory aventurine would leave the ipc after exiting nihility, since acheron presumably broke his ties- i wonder why he went back? perhaps he had no plans as to where to go, or he has some ulterior motive?

how did he get out of nihility so unscathed? (for context, i haven't gotten aven's text messages yet, but i'm aware of some of their contents since they've been floating around w/out spoiler tags. the messages are mentioned a bit here if you wanna avoid spoilering!) i know argenti got him out, but 1) why was argenti there, or where did he even find him? and 2) that seems so random- both argenti and jade confirmed it, but plot-wise what's even the point of argenti pulling him out? also argenti said he was in a "woeful state" when he got out, and apparently the stonehearts are willing to give aven a break (which i'm assuming is major, since stonehearts are super important and have a lot of responsibility, plus he just destroyed a cornerstone) so him already being back on his feet when we see the phone call is a bit weird right away. he doesn't even sound sick, and ratio or any other doctor is nowhere in sight! (message spoilers start here) i'm aware the aventurine cornerstone was fully shattered/destroyed while protecting him from nihility- was he really in there for who-knows-how-long without any protection at all? he's apparently having nightmares and the ipc needed to call in a doctor of chaos to treat him, which is concerning considering his mental health and general will to live were extremely low even before walking into the nihility. like he genuinely has some of the worst will to live i've ever seen in a character or human being- walking through the nihility should have utterly destroyed him mentally and physically, but it didn't. 2.3 HAS to give us a whole lotta context, especially with nihility lore (my favorite aeon, i may be biased) and more about the ipc!

anyway, thank you for reading this poorly formatted, stream-of-consciousness word vomit about 2.2's aventurine lore. hope you liked it! drop ur thoughts in replies and reblogs plz they give me life(although i will be very busy next few weeks, so please don't be offended if you want a reply and don't get it, im so sorry!)

2.2 was peak- a bit slow, but the story was some of the best, if not the best stuff hoyo has given us in terms of writing quality. so great! i cried for sure, and that boss battle was just everything- especially the music. robin my lesbian queen if i didn't have to pull for firefly i would get your lightcone for sure...

see you all next time! thx for sticking around (:

[snowblossomreads]

Where has Snow been!?

In hibernation! Sort of.

I didn't know if I should post this but if it's on the blog then I must have hit post. Anyways I'm alive even if haven't posted for months. Why is that you asked?

Well Ill put it under a read more in case you want to avoid my bitching and moaning.

Oh hello there, I guess buckle up for a crash out that has zero nuance.

So why I haven't Ive been active?

Burnout, writer's block, life etc etc. I could go on and on but I'm going to keep it 100 with you and be real. I feel like the things I write don't matter. I know the fandom Alan fandom is small, I know everything that is written isn't going to be everyone's cup of tea, I get it.

But the lack of interaction on the things I've written 'recently' has really disheartened me and still does especially when I put everything into them. There are handful to a lot of likes, a reblog here or there and a comment once in the blue moon. And the first two are nice but it's the third that I feel like is important. Maybe it's because I don't post every m week or two weeks and it just gets lost. Maybe I suck (jk Im not a professional but I know im not that bad) idk.

It just really hurts because whenever I read peoples stories in the fandom I try to leave comments about how it made me feel whether it be long or short. And I put everything into what I right and get nothing almost.

Of course there are regulars who I love and thank for sticking around but the balance is so skewed towards silence that I just want to quit altogether.

But I'm not. Or I don't think I am.

I still have a lot of stories I want to share and tell. And I know people say write for yourself and I do but if I share it I do want people to say something . I do love when people come into my inbox with silly things and I want to be active again and in the community and gush about Alan characters. But I'm also still trying to grapple with the bitter feelings I have as well.

And maybe after reading this it only makes my problems worse because it's giving entitled. Idk, I just want people to comment more and pop by because as @smilingformoney said once "it feels like i'm screaming into a void".

For the folks who say "Well you should do the same." I did. But when you're no longer having fun you tend to stop doing those things.

Anyways...I like sharing my stories, I like reading others stories. Will I get to them all? No. But I know the ones I get to I want to make sure I share them with others because writing is hard and gets very lonely and we have some lovely writers and creatives around us!

Alright, theres my very messy explanation about where Ive been, sorry if it is 'woe is me'.

Thanks for reading if you've gotten this far lol.😅

I hope to come back with something but until then I hope the stories I have already out in the wild can bring some enjoyment! (And don't be afraid to let me know!)

[buffyfan145]

so i read quite a few of your posts and spammed you with likes, i hope you don't mind too much but you are perhaps the most informed person on trop tea i have came across and your speculations make me more excited for s2 😅

so from what i understand, there has been a very little info on galadriel's storyline compared to other characters? all we know is that she is with adar and elrond is trying to save her, then she fights sauron. and as for sauron, he spends most of the season with celebrimbor (can i ask what's that horrible fate of his? i havent read the books).

tbh, my delulu ass hopes that the fact that gal's storyline is so under-the-wraps means that it's going to be smtng special and spicy (instead of her having a reduced screen-time), and the actors being more open about haladriel stuff is bc that "surprise" storyline has to do with them. has it been conformed that they will use their mental bond in the season?

ahhh, anyways, your theory about galadriel going with sauron after being alienated by other elfs is *chief's kiss*. i will personally go and kiss the ring of the writers if that's true! i have also been seeing speculations about sauron chasing galadriel but not sure what's that based on (saw it on twt but then decided to avoid the twt space bc im afraid of possible ship wars ruining my experience for s2 since i saw a couple of sauron and celebrimbor shippers say they will have sexual tension or smtng. totally fine with shippers being shippers but i have had such a bad experience with ship wars that i want to just altogether avoid even witnessing them).

sorry for a long ask/rant! thanks for all your posts, they are really interesting! ❤

That's no problem and thanks so much!!! 😀 Yeah, I keep up with all the spoilers and news now as this show has become one of my major fandoms now and I get like this and those who followed for over the years know when I get into a show or movie series. LOL I'm going to post most of this behind a cut since it's got major spoilers for the season but will say Morfydd has talked a lot about Galadriel's storylines and her getting Nenya is huge part of this too, and her, Charlie, and the writers did talk about her and Sauron's mental bond and that it will be a huge part too. Morfydd did film "Starve Arce", a horror movie which is out now, while s2 was filming but I don't think it impacted production that much since the cast is so large and s2 was filmed over 9 months. Also this season has been confirmed to be Sauron centric so it's more centered around him as the lead, but she's still listed by Amazon as the female lead and has second billing under Charlie. So now to the spoilery parts.

So again Galadriel's main storylines from interviews and the trailers are receiving Nenya and learning how to use it, the mental bond she has with Sauron (which they also confirmed will be a huge part of the show till it ends with season 5) and some sort of creepy vision early on in the season, being outcasted by the other elves and even causing issues with Elrond, she has scenes with Cridan and Gil Galad too as her fellow elven ringbearers, the fight with the barrow wights with a team of other elves, getting captured by Adar, learning from Adar more about Sauron, forming an alliance with Adar including what seems like to use her as bait to lure Sauron out, and then as we saw in the final trailer the big confrontation she has with Sauron and showing him Nenya. Plus, they could still be hiding things from us too as these trailers are only mins and we have 8 episodes total and if like in season 1 they likely are all over an hour long.

Celebrimbor's story is so tragic too. He actually gets killed by the orcs and dies in a horrible manner, which is also likely why the show's rating increased as it's even more violent than season 2. I don't want to spoil it too much, but he will die in the season finale and Sauron does horrible things before that to him both physically and verbally. It's very much like an abusive relationship which is why I don't ship them. I understand that others do but their scenes are going to be so hard to watch. Both Charlies and the writers have called it a friendship or bromance, but those terms seem to suggest they aren't going for it to be romantic either but a friendship that turns violent and more into Sauron/Annatar being master. But this does show Sauron treats Galadriel differently to everyone else.

But yeah I'm hoping there won't be a ship war but I doubt it'll be in this case. Celebrimbor also in the books wanted to marry Galadriel himself in the 1st Age but she fell in love with Celeborn and married him instead. I posted before how that could bond Celebrimbor and Sauron as they'll both end up losing her to Celeborn. If any ship war happens it'll actually be whenever Celeborn comes back as we all know from the books and movies Galadriel ends up with him and they still have to have their daughter as they can't change too much and still have to make sure the LOTR books/movies play out the way they do when this show ends.

I'm still thinking, like others now too, that it is possible she does go with Sauron at the end of season 2. Especially if she fully is cast out after working with Adar, using Nenya, and then all those that die in the battle including Celebrimbor. Sauron still hasn't given out the 9 rings to the men or created the One Ring by the end of s2 so he has to get to that in season 3, and her s3 storyline is a mystery too. It seems like a possibility like others and I have pointed out that they could leave together, whether she's in charge for now thanks to Nenya and her new powers, or not. She will find her own kingdom of Lothlorien and be queen there so we might see that play out but eventually if Sauron's with her it will still end in tragedy as he keeps falling deeper into his dark ways and will go back to Numenor, and her husband Celeborn will be back. We'll get more info as the episodes air but I can see something like that happening.

[isadollie]

So could I make a request for the matchup? Here's the info I wrote down;

-for fandom: haikyuu

-My name is Lorena (also not a native english speaker!), she/her, demisexual (no real preference of gender, i just like people but also quite a low/slow tolerancy for developing romantic feelings) no preference

-likes: being at home/alone, cooking and baking and drawing, scary uncomfortable movies

-dislikes: uggs, loud people

-in my free time i like to just listen to music and think about things or have a good cleaning session

-definitely on the grunge/alternative side, also alternating between masculine and feminine

-short and quite a small frame (at 156cm and 47kg but im trying to gain weight i swear), short dark brown shaggy hair which i dye dark red, brown eyes that do not work (i wear contacts)

-quiet and introverted, if i had to compare to a haikyuu character, in a kiyoko type of way. I find it easier to socialise with other introverts as well. Usually I keep my thoughts to myself unless im around close friends, I legit get silly with them, I like to be direct and honest and more of a listener. Mom friend of the group so I tend to be stern with my friends, lowkey a party pooper as im a hater at heart. That friend that does not like your boyfriend

-i dabble between infp/intp, who knows atp

-my dream present would be smth like a trinket that reminds them of me

-my love language would be quality time and acts of service

- taurus rahh 💪🫶

- a good deal are a bunch of mitski songs (abbey, thursday girl, cop car), red swan, francesca

Thanks so much, you're a peach!

— matchup —

if you'd want a matchup too, make sure to check out this! link

i match you with...

Iwaizumi Hajime!

★ i have a feeling Iwa would love alt aesthetics, personally i think he'd like alt music too-

★ being an amazing man he is, he'd definitely take things slow, he doesn't want to rush anything, his priority is to make you feel safe and comfortable around him

★ scary and uncomfortable movies you say? oh, when i tell you he's in love. he has a whole list of this kind of movies in his notes app, marking the ones you've already seen together. you also rate every movie you've watched, creating a whole tier list out of them lol

★ knowing that you find it hard to socialize, he wouldn't pressure you into doing so. however, if you two meet a whole bunch of his friends when hanging out, he'd check every minute if you feel comfortable enough around them. if you want to say something, he only listens to you and makes sure that others don't interrupt you when you talk

★ he loves to see you being mom of the friend group! it shows him how caring you can be towards the ones important to you, and that just makes him fall in love even more

★ he is soo acts of service guy, you can't change my mind about this i'm afraid. you hate to do this one particular house chore? call him. he'll do that. just like that

★ Iwa knows you don't like loud people, so whenever Oikawa acts a bit too annoying, he just has one more reason to scold him<3

hello, hope you liked it:) your second match was kenma! thanks for requesting<3

[gyunmireu]

ITS ME AGAIN HIII IK ITS BEEN LIKE 😭😭😭a month…. but im here agaian….with a humble request of ur headcanons on dokgo jun in general cuz i wanna hear ur thoughts on our favorite student council president🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

Dokgo Jun Headcanons

Fandom: Best Teacher Baek

Character & Pairing: Dokgo Jun, x reader

Word Count: 851

A/n: anon, Tumblr failed me and didn't notify me abt this ask 😭 I legit found out about it yesterday and was so shocked... I have never written headcanons before, even though it's so common on Tumblr, so this is my attempt. I hope it's enjoyable for you!

•♡•

General Headcanons

— He can be quite child-like when he's in a sleepy state. Like, he's more affectionate and touchy when he's sleepy and he gets easily pouty

— Has a slight sweet tooth and can't handle anything that tastes bitter, super sour or super spicy

— He used to be sleep in weird angles as a child but it was trained out of him so now he sleeps on his back– one step away from vampire-in-coffin style

— Journals everyday; he likes to write about the people he's getting close to and notes down minor information he learns about them, like their likes, dislikes, etc.

— He sees Soso like a weird, chaotic sister that he is responsible for when she gets out of hand; goes full big brother mode on her, lol

Relationship Headcanons

— He's such a serious person that I feel like his lover has to be a good combination of serious and relaxed: if you're not as serious about your life and duties, he wouldn't appreciate it as much... He would be attracted to you if you're someone who is a good, responsible student, or if you're on the opposite spectrum of being a delinquent maybe? In a opposites attract sort of way, I guess. But I think someone who takes their duties and ambitions seriously would be impressive to him!

— If you're equally as serious as him, that's just a recipe for disaster because someone needs to push him to take breaks and relax once in a while. You can totally lure him into taking a break by saying how you need one and his company would be appreciated (would definitely work if he has a soft spot for you)

— In a relationship though, I think he would be...

— Consent king !! Respect is such an important thing for Jun and he would be the most respectful lover when it comes to boundaries; if you want to take it slow, he most definitely would go at your pace

— Oblivious asf too. Doesn't realise when he looks really cool or sexy and so is unaware of the effect he has on you specifically... Like, he knows that others respect and admire him (since he's the president) at a surface level but he doesn't know how they actually feel, ykwim?

— SO awkward at first because he doesn't know how to act around you and it's his first relationship so he's a little afraid of messing it up by mistake (that's actually half the reason why he would go at your pace; it gives him a better idea of what to do)

— Once the relationship is serious, though... You're DONE for. You know how he overwhelms his opponents with his sword technique? That's gonna be him in a relationship;; prepare to be flustered all the time because he's a lover that goes above and beyond (made worse by the fact that he's oblivious to the consequences of his actions like, at least half the time)

— He's a walking green flag tbh; he wouldn't hesitate to apologise if he does something wrong or hurts your feelings

— Would be a little stiff at first because he's not used to talking about his feelings but if you patiently encourage him, y'all would be communication goals fr

— Notices and remembers the tiniest details about you; he's very perceptive, especially about things that have his interest, so if you just mentioned in passing that you like something or have a particular hobby or interest? he's noting it down and you're getting it the next time he buys you a gift

— His love language in giving is quality time and acts of service

— His love language is receiving (from you) is words of affirmation and quality time

→ Slightly Mature HCs/NSFW:

— Jun is so calm and dignified all the time that I can't help but think that in bed, where he trusts you enough to expose himself, he would be okay letting out his suppressed aggression

— Not in a mean way!! He would just manhandle you easily (he's so strong, oof) and he's just, the hungry type. makes you feel like you're going to be devoured or consumed (10/10 I would let him)

— Actually a virgin tho, so the first time would be crazy gentle and he's kinda internally freaking out about hurting you accidentally; it's very cute

— Overwhelms you with his "sword technique" after he learns what makes you feel good and where

— He would be a devoted lover; if you have any insecurities, he's not going to let them exist for longer. would be all gentle aggression as he showers his love especially on the parts that you dislike about yourself

— Secretly loves it when you praise him or when you are visibly admiring his body that he has carefully trained; he will get embarrassed if you catch on though, because it feels very vain (not that you would mind appreciating the finer features of his body and personality)

— Aftercare king !! also, he's the one demanding cuddles afterwards because there's something about holding you in his arms after such an intimate moment; it's the most peaceful and comforting place for him

°•❀•°

all likes, comments and reblogs are appreciated! ♡

[shouyuus]

new ask on the new blog!! i love the aesthetics!

glad to hear that things are going well on your part!! and yeah, i remember back in the days fandom on tumblr was more interactive, but it was also when we were all stuck at home because of external circumstances :’) i wish your bf all the best for finding a job… TT . TT i technically can enter tech, but i study design. i know user interface & user experience is an overlap of design and tech, but it’s highly competitive and i don’t really have the confidence… i don’t have a good portfolio to fall back on, haha. i think… looking at current happenings i am not optimistic about the economy either, but i will stay positive that eventually i’ll find something…

happy 30th birthday btw!!! what are 3 advice / tips you gained abt life or writing? (no pressure) — @anonymilk

you are so right soy sauce is the backbone of any great culinary dish… so are fics… i didn’t know soy sauce is shouyou in japanese! that makes your fic rec blog makes sense. ahhh, that’s so cute that your blog is technically soy sauce with inspiration from hinata and ur own name. i really like urls like that. so much story and meaning behind it XD how was it like setting up a brand new blog? any thing u might have done differently? — @anonymilk oh yes… what does it mean when a series is limited… — @anonymilk

gonna combine ur asks !!! hehe so! yes - the tech market is hard rn but i have faith and he's the best boi so he'll find something eventually; i think you'll def find something too! unfortunately i think in this economy, it rly just is about grinding and sending out a bunch of apps, and then eventually, something will come around.

thank u for the bday wishes!!!! hmmm 3 pieces of advice? i think:

don't be afraid of being silly! growing up is overrated and yes, there's a time and a place for that, but don't let go of the things that bring you joy, no matter how "weird" they are, or how "niche" or whatever. if it makes u happy, then it makes you happy!

sometimes ur emotions aren't a choice, but whenever they are, you're allowed to make the choice to not feel a thing -- this was a bit harder for me to learn, bc its hard to think of being like "in control" of ur emotions without trying to be like deny, deny, nope, nope, nope. but at least for me "choosing" not to feel a certain type of way is acknowledging like "cool okay so, my body/brain is having this type of kneejerk reaction, and that's fine, but also im not gonna let it consume me" and after that, it gets a bit easier to handle

specifically about writing? don't be so hard on urself! :) this is a true passion project right -- we don't make money, we do it bc we want to and it makes us happy, and it maybe makes a few other ppl happy too, and that's a pretty cool thing! ur allowed to take breaks, to step away, to do you and live ur life and come back to this hobby later! it'll always be here waiting for you

T B H setting up the new blog was kinda stressful but FUn stressful. like it took an obscene amount of time to figure out the kind of aesthetic i wanted to have, and then to like... re-acquaint myself with html and photoshop and all that LOL but im rly happy with how it's turning out so far !!!

and yES so a limited series is just like... a mini-series. so in tv that's like 3-4 episodes instead of a 10-12 episode "season" of tv. and i borrowed that term bc instead of having like 10 chapters, this "series" is only rly like... 4 chapters and a bit more so !!! that's all!

[caelumsnuff]

What keeps you here (listening to Redacted, slightly engaging with fandom, writing for it)? I don’t mean that in the annoying ‘omg why are you here if you’re gonna complain’ way. As I think it’s heathy for a fandom to discuss what could be better about their fandom space and what works and doesn’t work for them in the media they’re consuming (and even as someone who enjoys 99% of this place, this fandom’s ‘don’t even say that you don’t like a thing’ is unlike any fandom I’ve ever been in, big or small).

I’m asking ‘cause I’ve been listening to Redacted since 2021 and it became a fixation, but recently I feel it fading a lot (I don’t find the narratives as compelling anymore with Quinn and Avior being the recent ones, HBS was just okay even tho nothing quality wise changed to me, even my enjoyment of the podcast has waned (and I listen to a ton of podcasts of all types so that should have been the one thing that stayed lol, but they are inconsistent then come back and talk about Pokémon Go only for 70% of the episode every episode lol so I think that’s what’s not helping).

So what brought you here and what keeps you here now? What do you think will keep you engaging with his work? What do you think will (or could be) what makes you step away (whether abruptly or gradually)? (Sorry for all the questions. I’m curious. Hope you have a lovely day!)

Thank you for the ask! I know this is long and a little word soupy perhaps, but i hope you can glean some coherent meaning from it.

Under the cut bc long.

I've been here since very very very early in the channel. Like...... 2020 early. I was getting back into listening to rp asmr after having a small interest in it a few years earlier, and i came across redacted, a lil baby VA. Redacted had some unique qualities in the rp asmr scene, and if we're being honest he still does.

My brain kinda decided to hyperfixate on Redacted, i think because he had plot heavy audios and that wasnt super common in this genre of rp. And in the beginning, the plots were actually decently good in terms of writing and whatnot.

At some point along the way, that fixation became something of a special interest eventually. Probably sometime around early 2022 when i decided to join the discord to finally see some fanart and maybe make friends with people in this fandom. That kinda sent me down the rabbit hole of realizing "oh shit yeah these people have wildly different interpretations of these audios", which started to irritate me in regards to a certain magical therapist and i ended up writing a fanfic about it after being afraid to write for literally most of my life. I got very mixed responses, but some people were really kind and expressed gratitude for my writing and that made me actually want to be a part of this fandom, even if i stay in my own little corner. After that point i started to engage with the content far more critically, and decided that i care about his videos too much to not talk about them and critique them.

I can't really tell you why i stay here, not exactly at least. I think plot-wise the videos have declined in quality greatly, which i started paying attention to. I have been known to enjoy bad media. Like a lot. I watched all of Voltron, all of Vampire Diaries, 13/15 seasons of Supernatural, the Twilight movies, and i fucking enjoyed them. Im just a fan of shit media. Its really fun to critique as well! But like..... I don't think Erik is an all around shit writer, i think he's really good at some things. Character building (the base of a character at least), universe building (for the most part), and the line writing is really good actually, i enjoy them. And i think that he's decent when writing darker content and plotlines, look at the Adam plotline, the Ivan plotline, Imperium AU etc. So i guess the answer is i enjoy critically engaging with it and actively critiquing the art, as well as being attached to the characters and the universe. I have kinda yoinked the characters and they are now my little barbie dolls to play with.

Tbh i ignore most of the fandom bc i just..... simply do not care what people i dont know think about me. I think that majority of this fandom has demonstrated not just a lack of critical thinking skills, comprehension of fandom etiquette, and media comprehension skills, but also a lack of basic human decency and kindness. I do not care what people like that think of me. I know who i am, my loved ones know who i am, and im not gonna let children on the internet stop me from making the art i enjoy.

I take breaks from listening to videos every once in a while (like 2 months at the beginning of this year), but i always end up coming back. I guess im curious as to where this all is going, and i really really do want to see this man get better at writing which..... hasnt happened yet but i guess im patient enough to wait lol. I think he hit a new low recently though. I think the Quinn storyline is the first time that the bad writing actually made me like... angry. Like i was MAD, like shaking laughing in my bed mad. It took me an hour to cool down like what the fuck was that man 😭 If i think about it too hard ill get all riled up again.

I.... don't know what would make me step away tbh. Idk what that would take, but i guess it'd have to be worse than the Quinn arc, which is setting a pretty high bar.

So yeah i think i stay here because i love the characters (or the ideas of them), as well as the universe, and i think writing fics for them is really good practice for me. There's also some very sweet people in this fandom who have been nothing but kind and encouraging to me, and i do not want to let these interactions i have with you guys fizzle out just yet. I may not know yall or directly interact with yall a lot, but i really do love you guys in this little corner of the fandom ive carved out.

[kiatheinsomniac]

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ 𝐕𝐀𝐋𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐍𝐄'𝐒 𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐂𝐇-𝐔𝐏!*˚ .♡⋆ˊˎ -

𓆩♡𓆪 𝐒𝐀𝐕𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐃𝐀𝐓𝐄!

❝oh my, hello ! how are u? I don't know how this actually works but I'm gonna try this, I'm here to volunteer for the valentine's day event(?), I hope this is the right way to do it and if it's not, please ignore this message😅 alrighty enough rambling for me, I'm Lari, this is a nickname btw I love nicknamesss hehe, well, I'm 18 years old and I'm a Brazilian girl! So im fascinated in a lot of stuff, I love ocean so oceanography, marine biology, oceanology are like my bestest one, I love photography as well I'm not a big fan of posting my own pics, I actually like taking pictures of others and seeing it later :) I used to be a writer and a poet but I got too shy and stopped doing it, now I only write rarely when I need to get feelings out yk? Oh, I forgot to tell but I'm a lesbian, also, the fandom I would love it to be kny, resident evil village, Castlevania too! you can choose one or idk , I don't mind that much.. My personality is quite hard to tell, i'm quite a introvert and shy, and my mbti is INFJ! I have a wild past of being really agressive or having short temper but tbh I don't think that is the definition of me lately, I can be pretty calm but I can be mean if it's needed and I'm not afraid of people... Although all of that, I'm a cry baby lmao I'm not a person to have friends easy and I don't trust no one but i can be more extrovert with more introvert people and I tend to smile many times mostly when I don't know what to say or just whatever lol I'm into a artist side, I can paint too but it's not my big trait, I play a lot of games but I'm not the time to love the gun games, I loveee farming stuff, like Stardew Valley, Coral Island and that stuff, love it! I guess that's it hun, this is my first time doing it so I don't know if I did right.. Well, wishing u the happiest valentine's day and hope you don't have much trouble doing this request😅 byee!❞ anon

ੈ♡˳ 𝐁𝐄𝐋𝐀 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐒 𝐓𝐎 𝐁𝐄 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐕𝐀𝐋𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐄!

♡ Bela is really fascinated by how much you know about the ocean and he loves your photography! She's never left the village before so you're like a fountain of knowledge about the outside world to her. You're an INFJ and she's an INTJ so the two of you have a similar love and thirst for learning and what you know about a whole aquatic world she's never seen before really gets her hooked on you.

♡ she likes that you're calm but can be mean when needed. You're not a disturbance to her enjoyed quiet and you're not a pushover either; they're traits that she really admires about you. Being the oldest of triplets, she really values calm and quiet.

♡ she doesn't mind that you can cry a lot too. Again, being the eldest, she's used to having to help people and look out for her little sisters. So, it's almost instinctual to her to take you into her arms and hush you and rub your back, shoulders and head as you cry. She'll give off a fly or two to do little tricks and twirls for you to try and amuse a smile back onto your face.

ੈ♡˳ 𝐌𝐀𝐊𝐄 𝐈𝐓 𝐀 𝐃𝐀𝐓𝐄?

♡ Bela puts together a painting date in the atelier. She knows how creative and artistic you are and so she wants to give you a chance to let that out around her. She also encourages you to try your hand at making and painting teacups with her! She'd absolutely love to be able to drink her (blood-infused) tea from a cup that reminds her of you.

♡ considering how much you love farming games, she tells you all about Castle Dimitrescu's vineyards while you paint together. She's going to be the one to inherit it because she's the oldest and most responsible so she'd quite passionate about it. She tells you all about the different grapes and how they can be influenced and what makes Sanguis Virginis unique (other than the blood, of course, it does actually have wine in it too).

♡ she'll take you to the castle library in the evening too and have the maids serve dinner for the two of you there. She's like you in the sense that she doesn't really trust anyone, considering the village she's grown up in, but she does want to show you that she's opening up to you and she does this through touch: brushing her hand against yours, sitting close to you while you read, leaning her head on your shoulder, etc.

𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄𝐒: it's been far too long since I've been able to write about any of the Dimitrescu girlies

missed the match-up event? try ships instead! ☾ ⋆ ﾟlike my work? why not: ∘ buy me a coffee? ∘ comms. ∘ taglist ∘ follow/reblog

[funnywormz]

putting some red dwarf headcanons below the cut bc im feeling kinda crappy and just wanna talk abt them.

please keep in mind that these are my readings of the characters and im in no way trying to claim these things are canon or the "correct" way of interpreting them, this is just how i see them personally. a lot of this is just rlly self-indulgent and involves me Projecting. if you don't agree with me on any/all of these, that's fine, i don't expect anyone to be on board with all of them tbh, just pls be nice to be abt it im sensitive

also just a warning. this post got very long bc i have a Lot to say lol

lister

gender: trans man, he/they

sexuality: bisexual

other: adhd (inattentive type), depression, amputee with prosthetic arm

notes: i headcanon lister as a trans man bc im trans masc myself and i find it very comforting to see him that way. it also fits in well with some aspects of canon, like his pregnancy in season 2. he's also just trans masc swag personified lol.

the bisexual headcanon seems to be shared by a lot of ppl in the fandom, and it's personally the way i see him. i think he has a definite preference for women but is still occasionally attracted to men, and (i am pretending that one scene in series 7 doesn't exist here lol 😒) i don't think he'd be repressed abt it at all. he's horny and not afraid to act on it

in terms of the neurodivergent stuff, i think adhd-i fits with his personality pretty well. i think that combined with his tendency to be depressed makes it hard for him to stay motivated and focused, and often means that he doesn't rlly take care of himself or his personal hygiene and seeks out short-term sources of pleasure like food, video games, alcohol and sex to keep himself happy, but can't rlly focus on long term goals. being the last human alive stuck in deep space definitely doesn't help. often his "laziness" is a result of his lack of energy and motivation rather than being an intentional thing. some days he just spend all of his time curled up on his bunk sleeping bc he can't find the drive to do anything else. he doesn't rlly WANT to be that way, he wants to have fun and actually do things, but it doesn't always happen and he has some rlly bad days at times.

with the prosthetic arm, personally i think they should've given him a prosthetic and had a proper character arc around him learning to cope with a disability back in season 7/8, rather than playing it off as a joke and immediately retconning it. i haven't rlly done much planning for this one yet but i just know i want it to be a thing. i think he would probably have a dope looking robot arm or something bc there's no way he'd just go for a boring generic arm if he had the choice imo. he would love to deck it out and customise it and put stickers all over it despite kryten telling him not to hehe

rimmer

gender: mostly cis man but maybe with a little hint of nonbinary-ness in there that he unfortunately refuses to acknowledge. he/him

sexuality: h for homosexual BABEY!!!!!!

other: autism, adhd (hyperactive), panic disorder, generalised anxiety disorder

notes: i think that it's quite possible that rimmer could have a little bit of gender stuff going on. when he projects his own insecurities abt gender and sexuality onto ace he specifically makes jabs abt ace probably wearing women's clothes in secret multiple times, which is equally as telling as his sniping abt ace being gay.

i also do headcanon rimmer as gay, but deeply, deeply repressed about it. he pursues women and kinda forces himself to believe he's attracted to them, but it's out of his desire to meet his own stupid arbitrary expectations of what he "should" be like, rather than out of any genuine attraction. ik a lot of ppl see him as bi, which is perfectly valid! but personally his pursuits of women read to me as something he does bc he feels he needs to do it to complete his image rather than something he does out of any real desire. he's also got enough internalised homophobia that it'd probably take decades of therapy to make him be normal abt it lol. rimmer wants to be the kind of man that he thinks will receive respect and will meet the expectations his family put on him as a child, and having a wife and children was always part of that image for him. he never really stopped to consider if that's something he actually wanted. i think he becomes more accepting of his own queerness as time goes on, but it does take time.

the neurodivergent stuff should be pretty self explanatory but im gonna rant abt it anyways. as an autistic person myself, i find rimmer very relatable. there are multiple scenes in the series where jokes and sarcasm go over his head completely, and countless times where he misreads body language and doesn't seem to get what kind of behaviour is appropriate for certain situations. he just seems to struggle with social interaction and bonding/making friends in general. he has intense interests that others don't rlly understand, like telegraph poles, risk, cars, morris dancing, etc. he gets pleasure out of organising and sorting things to a degree that seems pedantic to others, and seems genuinely confused when lister doesn't share his enthusiasm for cataloguing the ship's food stocks as a fun saturday night activity. he seems to enjoy routines and predictability, and gets upset when unexpected things happen. he also tends to get obsessive about small details rather than focusing on the big picture.

in terms of hyperactive adhd, it seems to me that rimmer often has a hard time slowing down and relaxing, and seems to need to be constantly on the go and doing things and generally fussing about. he also is self aware abt the fact that he has a hard time being quiet, and needs to talk more and at a faster pace than most other people, especially when he's nervous or distracted. as well as this, he often stims by rocking back and forth and jiggling his leg up and down (this also fits with the autism hc). he also has a tendency to procrastinate and seems to have a hard time studying, despite his attempts to convince people otherwise. it often comes up in the series that he'll get hyperfixated on doing something a bit arbitrary, like making an impeccable study timetable/schedule, or tidying, or sorting things into perfect order, rather than actually STUDYING, which is part of why he continuously fails his engineering exam.

the panic and anxiety disorder thing should be pretty self explanatory too. rimmer is clearly a worrier and has multiple panic attacks in the actual series. he seems to spend most of his time in a highly strung state of near panic, to the point where it interferes with his physical health. the way the canon narrative handles his anxiety, and his neurodivergent traits in general, is often a bit shitty lol, but it seems clear to me that he suffers from anxiety and panic attacks. kryten mentions that he's at a higher risk for those kinds of disorders due to genetics, but i also think that his childhood trauma and subsequent lifestyle (deathstyle??) definitely haven't helped him get any calmer lol

the cat

gender: trans man, he/him

sexuality: bisexual aromantic

other: autism

notes: most of these are more of a "because i said so" situation rather than things with canon evidence lol but still. esp the trans man one. i don't think the cat rlly has much of a concept of his own gender at all tbh, he just decided one day he was more comfortable as a man and stopped thinking abt it after that lol. i see the cat as bisexual bc i don't think he'd rlly give a fuck abt gender as long as ppl are hot and well presented, and i think he's aromantic bc throughout the series he doesn't seem to show much interest in a committed romantic relationship with anyone. when he does show interest in people, it reads more as purely sexual attraction to me than any desire to settle down or have an actual relationship.

i think he's autistic but it isn't always picked up bc his special interest is fashion, which isn't perceived to be a "typical" special interest. he seems very particular abt textures and colours, and puts meticulous effort into his wardrobe and often only wants to talk abt clothes even when ppl want to talk to him abt something else. to tie in with that, he doesn't seem great at reading social cues and often makes faux pas and accidentally insults others without realising it. he seems to generally have a hard time with empathy and understanding that others might not always share his interests and priorities

kryten

gender: nonbinary, any pronouns but generally uses he/him and is fine with this

sexuality: aroace

other: autism (again)

notes: ik that robots being nonbinary and aroace and autistic can be an unfortunate and frustrating stereotype sometimes, but it's just hard for me to see kryten any other way 😅. anyways, although im not aro or ace, i AM autistic and nonbinary and i think robots rule and i adore kryten so WHATEVER!!!! take it up with my nonexistent lawyer or something idc

in terms of being nb, kryten seems to only have the vaguest idea of what gender actually is, and i doubt that he really identifies as particularly male or female. he's most used to being perceived as male, but i don't think he really identifies with manhood. he seemed actively repulsed by male reproductive organs when he was briefly human, which makes me think that if he was human he'd probably suffer from gender dysphoria if he had to live in an amab body, but likewise he seems to have mixed feelings abt being perceived as a woman in season 8. in truth, i think he fits somewhere in the middle.

i see kryten as aroace bc he just never rlly seems to express any interest in sex or romance, even seeming confused by both concepts at different points. he IS a deeply loving and passionate and affectionate person at times imo, but it's always platonic i think. he just doesn't strike me as someone who would get any enjoyment or fulfilment out of having sex or being in a romantic relationship.

the autistic hc should once again be pretty obvious. he has a hard time reading social cues a lot of the time, and enjoys repetitive tasks that other ppl find boring, like ironing etc. he also just generally does and says things that strike others as eccentric without meaning to come across that way and jokes often go right over his head. he's autistic to me. ik that a lot of this is tied up with him being a mechanoid, but im autistic and i love kryten so im claiming him fuck you

kochanski

gender: trans woman, she/her

sexuality: lesbian

other: autism, generalised anxiety disorder

notes: ive seen a few ppl hc kochanski as a trans woman and i rlly warmed up to it. it also makes sense that lister would get a crush on her if he knew she was trans and they had "two of the only trans ppl on the dwarf" solidarity, like i can imagine it being part of why he came to like her tbh.

ik kochanski's statement abt her dave being gay and them just pretending to be in a relationship was immediately dismissed by lister and she didn't argue abt it, but i like to personally believe it's true. i think for a long time she struggled with internalised homophobia and didn't mind getting attention from men, esp bc it validated her gender as well. but in my headcanon it was always uncomfortable for her and never felt right, hence why she broke up with her lister before the accident (although the breakup was also in part due to her lister's struggles with his sexuality as well). much like with rimmer, i think kochanski had high expectations of herself and felt anxious for others to see her as a "real woman", and for a long time it was hard for her to reconcile being a lesbian with those expectations. but she gets there eventually.

at first i was on the fence abt headcanoning kochanski as being autistic, but i decided to do it. she's better at masking than rimmer is, but it still shows through in her very particular sensory preferences and attachment to comfort items and occasional misreading of social situations. likewise with generalised anxiety, i think she has a tendency to get anxious and worry abt things that other ppl might not care abt, and becomes stressed pretty easily. she tries her best to hide it, but she likes to be in control of a situation and know what all of the likely outcomes are, and when she can't have that level of control she finds it deeply upsetting and destabilising. she likes to have predictability and routine and takes comfort in familiar objects and sensations even when those things might seem silly or irrelevant to others.

holly

gender: nonbinary (imagine all of the computer related puns she could make abt this lol he would love it), any pronouns

sexuality: bisexual

other: n/a

notes: holly is so nonbinary to me. it's basically canon already considering that they switch back and forth between male and female presentation multiple times. i don't think gender means a hell of a lot to holly but she enjoys messing around with it and trying out new things. my personal headcanon is that she prefers presenting in more of a feminine way but the default presentation he's programmed with is masculine and she can't rlly be bothered changing it a lot of the time bc she doesn't rlly give a smeg.

likewise i think holly is attracted to men and women and everyone else. i don't think he feels sexual or romantic attraction that often but it definitely happens. they only ever really feel attraction to other ai though and aren't into organic beings in that way, and bc he hardly ever gets to encounter other ai her romantic life is kinda nonexistent lol.

i think holly probably has some Brain Stuff going on but idk what exactly so ive left that blank for now. if i come up with anything i will probably edit this later

OK THAT'S IT FOR NOW sorry this post is long as fuck. hope you guys enjoyed reading me ramble on abt the silly little fellows

[kazuwhora]

hello hello, i see your requests are open now and can i request izana, wakasa, chifuyu and kazutora with an akutagawa!s/o? hope you have a great day/noon/night! ✨🤗

hi anon! sure! I will try my best with izana and wakasa since there's not tons to work with personality wise so forgive me if theirs are a little shorter heh. im gonna include a little blurb from the bsd fandom wiki for anyone not familiar with his character! I like these kinds of headcanon requests so if anyone wants to see more please feel free to request!

"Akutagawa has a black and white "survival of the fittest" view of the world, claiming that weak people should die and give way to the stronger ones. He is not afraid of pain and defeat His ruthless, vicious nature makes him one of the Port Mafia's most dangerous members, feared by both ally and foe. As violent as he is, Akutagawa maintains a generally composed and detached approach. Towards subordinates and superiors alike, he acts aloof, distancing himself from social interactions however possible. Nonetheless, his composure is fragile. Akutagawa is quick to lash out, ridiculing him for risking the bounty by acting recklessly. This quick temper often gets in his way, fuelling his actions to the core of his very being."

SUMMARY: izana, wakasa, chifuyu, && kazutora with an akutagawa!so

CW: hints of toxicity and violence, mentions of sex but not really all that nsfw-ish so otherwise not much else!

IZANA

- this is an interesting one because from what we know about izana, he is very similar in personality to akutagawa in terms of ruthlessness that stems from childhood trauma and isolation.

- in the case of a s/o with this personality, I think it would be a troubling relationship. lots of bitter fights fuelled by nothing but an inability to express vulnerability, while leaving both of you torn up inside and begging for someone to nurture the trauma and allow space for emotions.

- that being said, with toxicity and trauma also comes intense passion and desire. this relationship brings a lot of fire both in the bedroom and outside of the bedroom, with simple arguments often spawning into intense desperate (and lengthy might I add) sex. like, intense. it's almost like sex is the only safe outlet of these pent up emotions, providing a sort of comfort and also distraction for both parties.

- however as I said in general, this is definitely a toxic relationship. one where neither can help the other when it comes to growth and improvement on a personal level. it's unhealthy and enabling, but for a short lived fling it is hot as fuck im not even gonna lie. lots of hate sex too.

WAKASA

- so wakasa is another interesting one alongside izana given the lack of information and content we have about his character so please excuse the slight kc fanon version I have in my head of wakasa lol

- wakasa has a "don't fuck with me because I do not fucking care" type of vibe to him. I definitely think he's the type to completely disengage from the type of behaviours an akutagawa-type s/o might display. this leads to sort of a sense of competitiveness in trying to get some kind of reaction from him, and it has the potential (much like izana) to become toxic in nature

- any attempts to get under his skin are failed attempts, and the way he looks at you with that half bored expression is something that only triggers more of a somewhat emotional response from you.

- with that being said, my fanon version of wakasa is someone who while cold and aloof, is also quite a rational person. he's been typed by the fandom as INTJ which is quite a quick thinker, and I think he probably (despite not showing it very well) has a soft spot for you. but your passion and intensity (as well as your easily triggered dynamic) keeps him from completely being able to express this care in any way other than not engaging with your antics

- as much as there are some similarities with the type of toxicity in this relationship with both wakasa and izana, the intense passion isn't quite the same as it is with izana. instead, feelings of passion are more to the point and driven by pure instinct and desire rather than toxic passion. wakasa seeming like a very literal person, is actually quite mysterious deep down and has a lot (I mean a lot) of hidden desires and kinks that begin to emerge with time. it's rarely a conversation, and more often just something that happens that surprises you. you just have to go with the flow here, and let him take the reigns for once. it might actually be a good opportunity to allow for vulnerability to take the spotlight for once, which is something wakasa is surprisingly in tune with and quite to the point about.

CHIFUYU

- this is something much healthier than the last two. chifuyu, being an enfp is someone that's able to handle this level of intensity in a person while still being able to understand what's really going on.

- call him the trauma counsellor king. he values each and every response to a trigger that you might have. he notices patterns, he makes mental notes of things, and he does this all without making it seem like he's analyzing.

- to be honest he actually loves the spunk you bring on a day to day level. even though most of the time it's driven by bitterness or hate (not always towards him just in general) he is still able to see beyond that and appreciate you for what you are.

- with that being said, chifuyu will not stand for any toxic behaviour towards him. no sir he will not. threats and pushes for fights wont be tolerated, and he will either disengage or try to expose your vulnerabilities in an attempt at forced submission. this can be hard to get used to, especially with having a personality characterized by the inability to accept being vulnerable. but with time chifuyu is one to create a safe space for you to allow yourself to feel emotions beyond anger and resentment, and he encourages this.

- because of this very feelings based approach, intimacy with chifuyu is just that: intimate. he's extremely loving and doting, hoping that his sweetness can rub off on you a little bit. however he's also very accepting of your need for power over him (especially during sex) and will absolutely submit to your needs in order to please you.

- he really likes to put you in a place of pleasure though, so however that may come to you chifuyu is the one to deliver it.

KAZUTORA

- oh boy. this one is a doozy. listen. if we're talking about timeskip kazutora (as is the case with all characters i write about but I feel it especially important to remind ppl of here given his history), we're talking about someone who is quite literally walking on eggshells in terms of his trauma and emotional vulnerability.

- he's pretty good at being emotionally aware of his needs and struggles as well as the needs and struggles of those around him, but that doesn't mean that he's entirely healed or capable of managing toxicity or his triggers. he still slips up from time to time especially when things get hard, and sometimes finds himself falling into his old patterns. after all, he's only human. but this is where things could get messy in a relationship.

- for the most part, like I said, he's pretty good. so let's focus on that part first since I want to give him credit where it's due. he is very desperate for love and dedicated to providing something to his partner. in this case, he will seek to tap into his emotional vulnerability to provide some sort of comfort for you. he wants to see you happy, and calm, because he sees so much of his old self in you that it gets to him sometimes. but at the same time, he struggles with your relentlessness and can become emotionally drained when things get tough. he'll beat himself up for not being good enough to help you, and this is when he'll isolate and fall into old patterns.

- however, akutagawa's personality type isn't all bad. with a s/o like akutagawa, comes an immense amount of protection and loyalty for their loved ones no matter how tough things might be. in this case it might be hard to communicate this, but there will be times when it's needed in order for kazutora to restrain from old habits and ways of dealing with hardships. but he wants to share his healing with you, he wants you to be happy, and more than anything he understands the struggle of wanting to be happy and healthy but being afraid of losing the one thing that makes you you: your attitude and relentlessness. nobody understands this better than kazutora, which is why things between you can get frustrating and very personal for him.

- much like chifuyu, sex is driven towards pleasing you and only you. chifuyu leans more into switch territory however, while kazutora is 100% submissive. in this case it works out well, however he has a lot of boundaries and limitations when it comes to the way in which you function. he doesn't like degradation. instead, he thrives from praise and any sign of love and care. this might be tough for you to execute 100% of the time, but when it comes down to it the way his eyes twinkle for you is enough to make the ice around your heart melt just a little more each time.

[cinnamonest]

I feel like I’ve found my kin, I fell in love with Kakashi when I was like 8 LOL. Can I request some general yandere Zoro headcanons btw? I loved/still love him too 😶

Yes you may ahhh!!!! I love Zoro so much. I love writing for fandoms like this bc shounen anime are... Well, shounen, they're aimed at dudes, so they tend to not have as large of a female audience so there's not a lot of content out there. I love Luffy and there's like zero girl-targeted content for him. I swear I've spent so much time looking for wholesome, decent LuNa (my otp im sorry i just hhhh) doujins that aren't super male-oriented, and there's like... 2. For a 900+ episode anime. 2.

I also love the concept of a yandere in a situation where they CAN'T kidnap you, they're limited by their circumstances, so they have to kind of adjust or go insane. It's an interesting dynamic because it eliminates the norm for yanderes.

I think I mentioned this but I'm not 100% caught up with one piece (I mean, who is?), so I'm just keeping it simplistic and going with kinda basic Zoro and nothing with specific character developments or any spoilers other than his backstory

Yandere Roronoa Zoro (One Piece)

Tws: all the usuals -- yandere, noncon, kidnapping

He meets you while he's lost. I'm sorry I just. Zoro gets lost in the middle of some place they're docked, and you're just such a sweetheart, you see this guy clearly not knowing where he's going, and offer to help him. He's kind of taken aback by your softness and sweetness.

He's not easily made aware of his own feelings. He's a rough and tough sort of guy, and he has dedicated himself to swordsmanship so much that he's neglected to focus on himself and his interpersonal relationships, and he's not really self aware at all of his own feelings, very out of touch with his emotions.

Obviously, even if he tries to shove it down, Kuina weighs heavily on his mind in relation to you. He's another man that has known loss and it's dealt its damage on his psyche. He can't lose another person who's dear to him again.

This results in him becoming insanely protective, one of the most protective yans out there. He's easily one led into paranoia delusions regarding your safety. However, he's an honest and reasonable guy and can be level-headed when confronted. If someone (not yourself, as he thinks you're naive, but maybe another girl like Nami or Robin) tells him he's being overprotective and exaggerating about your safety, he may actually have a moment of self-realization and admit to it. He's capable of being reasonable enough to see it once it's pointed out to him. However... this doesn't stop him. He tries, really, he genuinely tells himself that he needs to stop. But his instincts just kind of take over. It's an impulse, to stop you from doing even the most slightly dangerous things.

Once you join the Straw Hat Crew, he just kinda... clings. It's a silent presence, but he's always there, constantly seems to show up wherever you are. Unfortunately, you can't really... get away from him per se. You're kinda limited to one ship, at least as long as you're out on the sea. Your only option for respite is going to your room or bathing, otherwise, he's gonna follow you, even if he's not saying anything and (very badly) trying to feign indifference, pretending you just happen to be going the same way all the time. He doesn't really know what to say, he's not good with these things, and often he's acting without really thinking too much about it. He won't usually strike up a conversation, he just... is there. Watches. May awkwardly ask a question or make a passing comment.

One scenario I imagine is you jokingly picking up one of his swords and wielding it around giggling and he just flips out, takes it from you and yells at you not to do that, are you an idiot? Do you want to trip and fall and have that impale you? Do you realize how easy it would be for you to slice your arm open by accident? It's startling to both you and anyone watching -- even for someone who gets yell-y as easily as him, it seems like an overreaction. He'll apologize but insist it's a safety thing, really.

And he really tries to hide his more... aggressive nature, because he thinks it will drive you away -- he's a blunt, tough guy with a short-fused temper, and he thinks that's definitely not something women like very much. He tries not to yell at you, not get mad so easy, keep his calm better around you, and might even be nicer to others so that you don't think he's mean. And for the most part, he can manage that. Except when it comes to a very specific, very problematic blonde crew member. His little conflicts with Sanji get worse, to even a point that he's snapping at him so frequently that even Sanji himself is a bit bewildered and caught off guard by it. The others notice they fight a lot more often... and Zoro always seems to instigate it, picking quarrels over the littlest things. In reality, he's afraid of the other's... sleazy nature. He can't have you falling for that bastard. He even starts to get jittery when you're in the presence of Franky, Usopp, hell even Luffy of all people. It's noticeable, and everyone kinda worries for him.

He kicks himself for it as soon as he does it, but he finds himself insulting you nonetheless. It's a terrible habit. He gets so awkward and flustered that it's second nature for him to say something snarky or even rude when you talk to him, and he immediately is just mentally screaming at himself for doing so. This will get a bit better with time, though, if you two talk more often.

Now, even if you can fight, you're never gonna really get the opportunity. In battle, he's clinging to you and protecting you at every moment, even if it costs the others some unnecessary wounds. It's highly uncharacteristic of him, and they notice. He won't leave your side, insisting that you're a weak fighter and that he has to take care of you. You just don't get it, you overestimate yourself, you underestimate your enemies, you're a girl. What, Nami and Robin? Well, they've been at this much longer than you, and they had rough upbringings. You're different. You're soft... fragile. You just can't see it. You're lucky he's here to protect your dumbass.

Due to your setup, well, he can't really kidnap you per se. He undoubtedly would if you two were somewhere else, in another life or another setting, but that's not really an option, and even as a yandere, he would never go so far as to kill or abandon his crew. So, he's stuck with just... slowly, slowly mentally deteriorating.

Now, he's not capable of kidnapping, he's not smart enough to really manipulate you into anything (although he WILL tell you that some of the other guys are out to use you), so, he's left to be the guard dog he inevitably becomes to you. If you avoid him, he'll just follow you. If you don't talk to him, that's ok. If you confront him, he'll just insist he has no idea what you're talking about, and you'll start to feel like maybe you're just paranoid. The others... don't really know what to do, to be honest. I can see Nami/Robin potentially confronting him, but in the end, they can't force him to change his behaviors, and they can't afford to lose him. This results in, gradually, everyone slowly kind of accepting your dynamic onboard. They feel bad for you, really, but... in the end, Zoro's just more valuable to the crew. Sorry. They're not gonna get rid of him, but they don't want to get rid of you either.

If you leave? It may just be one of the very very few things that could ever cause him to leave the Strawhats. It would tear him up, really, it goes against his dreams, his pride, his loyalty, but in the end... his loyalty is first and foremost to you. He'll follow you if you leave. It's a bad move on your part, because this gets rid of the only thing standing between you and kidnapping. Which, at that point, surely will happen. Like his other behaviors, he'll feel bad, he'll try and stop himself, tell himself it's wrong, but you'll end up bound in some dark basement nonetheless. He's one to take a very simple approach. Find you alone, sling you up and over his shoulder and carry you off before anyone can come.

Rejection doesn't faze him. No matter what, he'll remain by your side. Even if you never love him in return. It's just his nature, he's a guardian through and through.

In the end, he'll be right there by your side, scaring off any competitors, clinging to you like glue, ever in your presence like a shadow, forever. Whether you want him to or not. He's just an inescapable force, an unmovable object, and you're wasting your time trying to change your fate.

Now, he's very flustered with anything sexual. Highly embarrassed, lots of shame, and doesn't talk much about it. It just kind of happens. He doesn't talk much during, mostly grunts and the occasional fuck when you clamp down, occasionally asking you if you're ok, if it hurts, if it feels good. It's one of the only very soft sides of him. In the end, he really, truly loves you, and doesn't want to hurt you, he wants you to feel good and just love him. It's a very different side to him, one no one else has ever really seen, it's the most vulnerable he himself has ever been with another person.

He feels shame for it, but initially he'll definitely be one to steal your things, sit outside of your room at night, listening to you through the wall, try and get glimpses of you bathing or dressing. He really, really feels guilty, and he's one that will, once you're comfortably restrained and never going anywhere, just sit down and list out every nasty little thing he's ever done regarding you, just to get it off his chest. He understands if you react badly, and he'll apologize, which is a bit ironic considering how much worse kidnapping you is.

He'll apologize for that, too. He's actually one to do so a lot. He's normally a proud guy, but with this? He knows it's wrong, he knows it's fucked up. He knows he can't stop. And he'll be sorry to the moon and back. Just never sorry enough to stop.

He's actually a pretty vanilla guy. Hand-holding missionary type. And, despite being so embarrassed over it all, oddly romantic about it. It's one of the only things he's ever soft and gentle about, it's almost unbelievable to you that he's capable of being so gentle and slow with anything. But he'll kiss your forehead, really take his time with it all, make you cum on his fingers before ever actually fucking you. Hold your hand, look into your eyes. It would be honestly incredibly sweet if it weren't... you know, taking place in some dark sealed off room after dragging you there against your will.

If he's particularly mad, he can get rougher, but he'll apologize after. It's a lot of harsh grabbing, biting, it leaves bruises that he'll rub over softly, whispering an apology, even if a little part of him likes the way it looks on you.

[yanderelovlies]

✨Galaxy Anon ✨ here!

Haha you forget viví? Friends also have to tease each other until they scream for mercy hehehe suffer pfft. Let me think about it….No.

But I still feel bad viví! Just talking with you is enough for me! It shows you care that you even respond to me and call me a friend! I probably wouldn’t take it until I really want something, I will feel bad and hate spending others money unless it was for food…then spend that money since I love food lol. Well at least you have lots of guts but I know I would feel embarrassed still since my stuff can either be normal to my god what the hell why do you like that?! Not to mention alot of stuff I’m into I really have no one to talk to about most of it since usually they aren’t into it or I’m afraid they judge me. Mostly the latter. So I’m grateful you even care about me so thanks for that.

It does I mean I get whey we use it but damn does it suck. Oh makes sense so like a discount basically. Yeah I get that I mean it’s already stressful keeping your grades up in class but having the pressure so you have a easier way to college? Nerve wracking and stress inducing.

At least you care since unfortunately a lot of siblings don’t care enough or put down there siblings. I think your doing a lot now since you worrying about that and even some parents don’t give two shits about it or claim it’s too hard to understand now. I’m sure you are, more than you think. Your amazing seeing how sweet you are viví.

Yes unfortunately especially now it can cost your life being a Good Samaritan on the road if someone needs help and they can rob or even worse kill you. And all people you wanted to be a good person.

Yeah I knew I made a good call. I maybe would’ve have either freaked out or get very aggressive then, mostly the latter if I wasn’t emotional more prepared than how I first started out when first working there. And for sure I don’t want to also get aggressive to some other customers for one lady attitude and they had nothing to do with it. I have done it before and I’m not proud of it since they shouldn’t have gotten my anger.

Pppfffttt moving on! This isn't bully vi hours for their questionable tastes.

IM THE SAME WAY AND IT DRIVES MY FAMILY WILD. I'm always getting them things and when they go "Hey want something?" I just tell them nah I'm good. Then I get asked, "how come you don't let me get things for you." Because I feel bad taking other people's hard-earned money!!!

Not to be too straightforward, but I would love to hear about your fandoms. It's one of my favorite subjects, and who knows we might have some in common! (Lowkey I miss the hoodie ugh I keep looking at the picture).

It really is though, and the fact that I have to take harder math classes lowkey scares me. I am having a blast with Philosophy, sociology, and psychology. I was having fun with composition until this professor. My last one was cool and even sent pictures of his dogs with every assignment.

Aww making my blush

I'm just trying my best. I even had a little evening outing with them. Did some gift card shopping then just rode around and sang our hearts out.

God going for a walk or jog could get you unalived these days. Which always scares the shit out of me since it's in my exercise routine. So I never go alone or without pepper spray. I also trust no one. I'm polite I say good morning, but I'm always keeping am ear open.

Hey at least you learned from that and made yourself better! Might I also add I have so much respect for you for being able to handle that on the daily. People are just getting meaner for no reason, and you don't deserve it.

[bethandstars]

I've scrolled through a lot of discourse on episode 4 of Loki and I need to talk about it

(good lord its a whole essay im sorry)

I gave myself a headache from crying while watching this. (I joined the Loki fandom post-IW so I’ve never had to see him die before while emotionally invested and boy!!! Is it doing things to my fragile psyche!!). But now I’m rehydrated and more stable and ready to party so let’s go

Right off the bat, I loved this episode — loved it loved it loved it. Silly, manic in-shock Loki is gone and shit is getting real. My thought while watching this was truly “wow this is my favorite episode so far” and damn am I in a minority with this opinion lol.

So here’s my perspective on some of the discourse flying around, and just general thoughts

On the whole ‘Narcissist’ thing:

IMO, Mobius saying this means nothing: he’s mad and he’s spouted lies at Loki to push his buttons before (see: every interaction they’ve had since episode 1).

Loki saying this to Sif-- well, Loki is and always has been an unreliable narrator on himself. The major theme of this show is that he doesn’t really know who he is, deep down, and he’s trying to figure it out. The TVA is taking advantage of this, and even though he’s trying to stay above it all throughout the series, he's still in a really impressionable spot and absorbing what others tell him about himself. (not to mention this scene is literal torture and he’s already proven that he’ll say whatever he needs to to get out of it.)

But he does admit one true thing when he says “It’s because I’m scared of being alone.” (And like wow okay same don’t mind my tears) but here’s a big brain idea!

Sif pulls him up and says ‘You are alone, and you always will be’, which is like, WOW that’s cruel after what he said, but it makes me ask wonder: Sif is sentient in this scene, but obviously it’s not really her. Who’s controlling her? And why is it so important for them to make sure Loki thinks he’s alone? I’d go as far as to wager that Sif never even said this to Loki, the big bad made this up. (he admits he forgot about this ever happening, I doubt he’d remember what she said.)

I think the nexus event on Lamentis that caused the branch was two Loki’s joining sides. Or, Loki no longer being alone. Loki insists while talking to Mobius that “she’s not my partner!” but she was, and they were partners from the moment they grabbed hands on Lamentis — right when the timeline broke off. I think Loki variants teaming up is the biggest threat to whoever is pulling the strings here — that’s why the post-credit scene is so significant. (Is Loki the only person who has multiple variants of himself who've escaped the TVA?)

And here’s where I’m gonna get salty--so I apologize but i need to rant about this-- but it’s seriously pissing me off that so many people are intentionally reading this as Loki/Sylvie and then being mad about it when that’s clearly not what’s happening and why is everyone acting like Mobius with one angry jealous brain cell and no critical thinking about the context of the characters.

If people ship it that’s chill, but for the people who are against it—it’s clearly supposed to be platonic, and it’s so upsetting that in the year of our lord 2021 we still can’t have a man and woman hold hands without people saying it’s proof they want to f*ck each other, like what in the misogyny??? STOP. This show was written by a bi woman and Tom the-most-emotionally-sensitive-man-on-this-planet Hiddleston — let them display an intimate loving friendship goddammit. This isn’t romance, this is Loki learning how to admit he cares for someone who cares for him in return — something he hasn’t experienced a whole lot of and clearly doesn’t know how to navigate.

(You have permission to personally come at me if it actually turns out to be romantic by the end of the show—but as of right now I will die on this hill.)

Him putting his hands on her shoulders to me was a clear indication he wanted to hug her, and I’d like to think he would have told her he cares about her, and that they can figure it out together. Because these are two characters who’ve never had anyone else to rely on and trust, and for the first time they’re not alone.

And I have to think about what prompted this from Loki. He just lost Mobius the moment after he called him friend. The way I see it, he’s just realized the true gravity of what they’re up against, and Loki is suddenly very afraid of losing Sylvie too before he tells her cares about her, of dying truly alone because he never told anyone what they meant to him. (Don’t think about this in the context of him also having watched his entire family die knowing he never told Frigga or Thor how much he loved them either don’t think about it—) He’s realized, finally, that he has doesn’t have to be alone, that he can choose to be close to people and have friends. And god it’s so heartbreaking that he never got to hug her or have that moment with her. I really hope they get that in the end. I hope he gets it with Mobius. I hope they have a group hug. I'm upset again.

Okay, deep breath, ANYWAY.

Hopefully this didn’t come off as attacking anyone else’s opinions.

Personally, I love this character so much, I’m just so happy to be seeing him in his own storyline that they can’t go wrong here. Objectively I think the production is amazing, and personally I love they way Loki’s character has been explored so far. (Yea yea, was I HOPING that the bad-memory loop would morph into Sanctuary and Thanos and like a full exploration of his true worst memories? Yes but let’s be honest my whump needs will never be met in canon and I have to accept that lol.)

Honestly I left all my own meta about this character at the door when the series started, because for me the opinions I’ve formed from the hundreds of (amazing) fics and meta I’ve read on this character and what’s true in canon are basically inseparable at this point, and no portrayal is going to live up to the way Loki exists in my head. Canon Loki and fic Loki are two different characters and I can enjoy both at the same time :) I’ve just loved seeing the character get given the different dimensions he deserves, and written by people who care about his story.

Also, it’s not over! If he was dead and this was it I’d be very upset, but this is the rock bottom of the storyline, and I think the whole next two episodes will be the build back up. I trust it’s gonna be worth it. SO hyped for flaming sword Loki. I would die for Sylvie, but I’m excited to see him on his own again.

My current most pressing questions are:

-what was the fallout of Sylvie’s bombing the timeline? (Have we seen that yet, am I just dumb and missing something?)

-Obviously, who’s behind it all? (Kang? Is there a head honcho Very Evil Loki at the top?)

-How much does Ravonna actually know, and to what extent is she just a pawn too? She asked Sylvie to prune her— she’s probably also been duped here.

-Is everything we learned about the sacred timeline BS? How much of what the TVA workers believe is real?

-my favorite theory so far is that the war of the timelines miss minutes talks about hasn’t actually happened yet, maybe making setting that into motion is the true endgame, leading into Multiverse of Madness?

(Side note: holy HELL im so excited for this soundtrack to drop on Spotify. It’s SO AMAZING I had CHILLS in the end credits.)

Open invitation to discuss anything with me if you feel inclined! :)