#and just thinking about the way he constantly forces physical contact even when

[ohcarolina]

and there's so much stuff in my head that just makes it all so clear. like right now he's putting our son to bed and he's just arguing with him... never a nice word to his literal flesh and blood, he only ever cares about me in an extremely uncomfortable hyperfixated way. and i remember when he proposed i hated every second of it, i felt so awkward and i actually had like a rage in my gut... and then i said yes because i'm a dumb bitch who could never say no. i know this all sounds really horrible reading it from an outside pov...

[ihrtsevyn]

٠ ─ BLUSH, BLUSH, BLUSH, YOU ARE NOW MY BIG FAT CRUSH . . . 𖤐 | j.g x reader

SYNOPSIS headcanons of johnnie having a crush on you :)

WARNINGS no specific race/age/gender specified. nothing explicit of any nature. lowercase intended. very loosely proof-read.

WC: 1028 >

. . .

johnnie's crush on you developed out of the blue, in all honesty. it wasn't love at first sight, like he was struck by cupids arrow. it was more of a quickly approaching train from a distance coming towards him while he was tied down to the tracks. it took him a while to finally catch onto his feelings, but once the realization hit, it hit him hard.

He was always attracted to you physically, but getting to know you more made that attraction grow emotionally as well.

. . .

He'd find himself thinking about you constantly. he'd wonder what you'd be wearing today and if anything you wore would correlate with his outfit so he could point it out. he'd think about you at gatherings when you're not there, always thinking about how he'd have 10x more fun if you were there.

he's always trying to strike up a conversation with you. if there's an opportunity johnnie can take to talk to you, he's gonna take it. sometimes he'll even approach you before having a conversation starter ready in his head.

tries to make you laugh. he'll do whatever he can to hear that pretty laugh of yours that he's grown to love. he'll embarrass himself and draw enough attention to form a crowd if it'll get a half-hearted chuckle out of you. he'll even bring out timmy if he really wants to force that laugh out of you.

gravitates towards you. at parties, or just friendly dinners, johnnie will always find a place next to you. sometimes he doesn't even try to, his body is just naturally attracted to your energy. most of the time he does look for you first out of the crowd, and if he can't find you he goes to jake and asks for you. on more than one occasion he's asked someone to trade spots with him to get closer to you.

plays with your hair. he does it unconsciously. if you're standing or sitting close by him he'll find himself zoning out and pulling on a strand of your hair, softly twisting and twirling it between his fingers. if you have boundaries on your hair and don't like it to be touched or just have really short hair, he'll instead substitute it for your accessories. tugging on whatever bracelet, belt, or necklace you have on.

talks quieter around you. whenever you two are having a conversation his voice gets significantly softer. he'll go from screeching at jake to whispering at you. his entire demeanor eases and he's suddenly right in front of you exchanging hushed whispers and quiet laughs.

avoids eye-contact. if you're someone that makes intense/unwavering eye-contact with people when talking, johnnie simply wouldn't be able to handle it. his eyes would dart in all types of directions before finally landing back on you, he'd only be able to hold it for so long.

protective of you. in any heated discussion johnnie will be there to back you up. if someone's talking shit he'd be the first to defend your name while insulting the person who's talking down on you in the same breath. if one of your friends are playing a cruel joke on you, he'll be the first to rush to your side and shield you from prying eyes.

creates a playlist for you. one of his most listened to playlists is the one he made for you. the title is your name with a simple black heart and the run time of it is at least 2 hours or more. if you recommend any songs to him they'll go directly into that playlist without fail. he likes to keep the playlist on a loop when he's doing mundane tasks around the house.

always finds some way to mention you. it annoys literally everyone with how much he brings you up but he can't put a stop to it even if he wanted to. the most random things could remind him of you and some poor soul has to be stuck with him fawning over you again because somehow an empty baskin robbin's cup in the middle of a parking lot reminded him of you.

indulges in your interests. if you loosely mention that you're interested in something, johnnie will go into full research mode and figure out the lore behind whatever game/movie/tv show/book you're interested in. anytime you have a conversation about that topic he'll bust out a random fact in hopes that it'll impress you.

genuinely wants your opinion on things. he cares about your point of view on things, so it's only natural that he goes to you for advice and to hear your thoughts on certain things.

a bit more affectionate with you. it's the little things that someone would really have to pay attention to take notice of. his affections simply include fixing your jacket that's sliding off of your shoulder, pulling your hair from under your jacket, putting an arm out in-front of you if you've ever came close to running into someone, asking if you've eaten, letting you fall asleep on his shoulder on long car rides, etc . . .

responds to all the tik toks you send. you could send 20+ tik toks over the course of an afternoon and he'd watch every single one of them, responding to each of them with either an emoji or a drawn out text. it might take him a while to respond to all of them but he will eventually.

always picks up your calls. it doesn't really matter where he is or who he's with, if you're calling he's gonna answer. he could be mid-shit on the toilet or at a loud overcrowded party with blasting music, it doesn't matter. he'll always answer even if the call ends up being just 2 minutes because you wanted his opinion on what shoes you should wear. he'll never regret answering the phone for you.

waits patiently for you. even though you might not return his feelings, he still has love for you. he will patiently wait for you as long as he needs to if it meant you'd return his affections at some point.

. . .

i haven't written a fic in so long and just busted this out in my sleep deprived state lol. if anyone has any requests or ideas they'd like to see me write out please let me know! :) i'd be happy to take requests and i hope you guys enjoyed this small fic. <3

[llamagoddessofficial]

What would happen if MC was a sea diver? Maybe she was exploring a ship reck and the siren boys bumped into them? How would they react?

Sans: He's much more calm, when she's a diver. There's something about her already being in his territory... rather than meeting her on land and wanting to drag her into the water, he meets her in the water, and needs to not give her any reasons to stop coming to the water. No need to be scary. Just take it slow.

They had a very tender moment at their first meeting. After first sighting one another, they spent a long few minutes just watching each other. In the same way that you wouldn't expect to see an actual orca while scuba diving in relatively shallow water, Mc wasn't expecting to see an orca siren. There was also an undeniable magic to the moment, staying still as possible and holding eye contact with a highly intelligent creature from an entirely different world to your own. When he did draw in, it was slow, mutual studying - she looked at every line and scar, he pretended to care about her equipment so she wouldn't be weirded out by him constantly staring deeply into her pretty eyes. The only physical contact they shared was a single brush of her hand against his (the only part of her not covered by wetsuit) before he left, cautious not to overstay his welcome and intimidate her.

He follows her around but rarely initiates contact. He enjoys 'playing'; showing her interesting things, retrieving lost items, introducing her to new and exciting wildlife and dive spots. He's going to get her to trust him. He just has to be patient.

Red: Y'know those videos of sharks coming right up to a diver for scritches? That's him. Unlike Sans' cautious and slow approach, Red was very Red, and upon spotting her just bulldozed right over to her. She tried to be a responsible diver and not interact at all with wildlife, staying on the seafloor and slowly backing away from him, but Red wasn't gonna let that happen - and what's she going to do, swim away? Cute. She can't outswim him. On their first meeting he squeezed any part of her he could reach before she could pull out of range again (arms, legs, hips,) tapped on her scuba mask, blew bubbles at her, and bit a chunk out of one of her dive buddy's flippers as a warning. He's brazenly flirting.

He 'behaves' when she gives him attention. At first she was genuinely intimidated, but now she treats him like an overenthusiastic large dog. Funnily enough he does genuinely like scritches, especially on the parts of him he can't easily get to, like on his tail and behind his main fin.

He and Sans usually manage to alternate what days they show up to see her, but when they do see each other they frequently get into scraps. Especially if one of them thinks the other is too close. Sans doesn't like Red's forwardness with her, and Red doesn't like a crazed lonely orca being anywhere near his fragile human, but both are unwilling to kill and reveal their bloodthirsty natures. They force themselves to get along... especially when sight of the two giants fighting immediately makes her evacuate the water.

Skull: He was probably living in a wreck she dove in. It's nice and dark, but spacious, and full of interesting trinkets he can collect. On their first encounter, Skull spent most of his time silently stalking Mc in the dark water. She didn't notice him until the very last second; you can imagine the shock and terror at shining a light into a shadowy corner and illuminating a massive grinning face.

She doesn't entirely know what he would've done to her, in the confinement of that wreck, if she hadn't shone the light into his face and startled him long enough to get the fuck out of there. But from that point on, no matter where she dives, if neither Red nor Sans show up Skull will always be there. He makes his aquarium counterpart proud by stealing her things. She doesn't understand why - he gives the items back eventually, so does he even really want them? Is he a kleptomaniac? Is this just a way to get her attention? Who knows. At least he doesn't eat her. He absolutely could; despite regularly diving in groups, nobody ever sees him coming until her kit is already missing.

[lees-chaotic-brain]

Its always about gojo being clingy, but what if reader will be clingy and we will pepper him with love♡

Thanks for sending in requests! I love hearing from you guys, like seriously, it makes my day. Invade my ask box with requests or just to ask questions about me anytime!

I really like this idea. I'm kinda mad I didn't come up with it tbh lol.

CW: fluff, a little angst, spoilers for the first half for season two, female reader, trust issues, betrayal, cuteness

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Gojo x Clingy Reader

Gojo Satoru hadn't realized how much he needed, how much he craved to be loved, until he met you.

Before he met you, he had been fine with physical and emotional contact, sure, but it wasn't like something that he enjoyed and sought out.

The first time he met you was in high school.

Instantly, he had noticed how beautiful you were. Even then he had admired how you freely doled out affection, and always wanted to be around those you loved.

Not only that, he always felt a little envious of those you freely gave out love to, like your partner at the time, or Shoko, your best friend. Although, he was so dense back then even he didn't realize he was jealous.

While he always appreciated and savored the hugs and high fives you gave him, he didn't realize that he wanted more until much later in life.

After Suguru left, everyone in your small group of friends became a little more distant, and drifted apart as the years went by after you graduated high school.

Then you re entered his life, as beautiful as you had been, if not more. But your signature signs of affection, and open and loving personality was subdued, the pain of Suguru's betrayal causing you to withdraw into yourself.

This was the first moment that Gojo realized how much he missed you. The you that once burned so brightly with warmth and care, not the version of you that stood before him now with prominent eye bags, a forced smile, and barely an ember of what you used to have.

From that moment forward, it became his personal mission to help you heal. To become comfortable with loving and trusting the way you used to be.

It took time and a lot of effort, but after jokes, reminiscing about high school, getting coffee, being there for you on the hard days, holding you when you cry, and constantly reassuring you that he wasn't going anywhere, you began to open up again.

And somewhere along the way, he realized two things.

One, by helping you with your anxieties and guilt and hurt over Suguru, he had begun to heal a wound he didn't even know he still had.

Two, he had fallen completely and hopelessly in love with you.

For the first time since Suguru had left, your smiles reached your eyes, genuine and sweet. You began showing affection again, leaning your head on Shoko's shoulder, patting the students on the shoulder or high-fiving them, returning Gojo's hugs after the two of you spent hours talking about all of your good memories from high school.

After a lot of thought, and late night rants to Shoko, he asks you out.

You agree happily, telling him that if he had waited any longer, you would've just asked him out to get it over with.

And once you started dating, hoo boy, if he thought you were affectionate and clingy beforehand, he had another thing coming.

He comes home from a mission?

You're waiting with his favorite dinner and all the baked goods his sweet tooth could desire.

You insist on feeding him as you sit on his lap, informing him that it was your job as his girlfriend to take care of him.

Afterwards, taking a bubble bath with him, washing his hair, massaging his scalp is a must.

Then you wrap yourself around him and order him to cuddle you for hours on end.

And if he thinks he is going to get away with leaving your side for even a second over the course of the next couple days, he's wrong.

Part of it is you needing reassurance that he isn't going anywhere. The other part of it is just your nature. You need to take care of the people you love, to cuddle them, cook for them, hold them, love them. It's just how you are.

If it was anyone else, Gojo would probably find it annoying and overbearing, doubting their intentions, or just flat out disliking it. But if it's coming from you, well that's a different story.

If it's coming from you, there is nothing he wants more than for you to love him, because your outgoing and affectionate personality was part of the reason he fell in love with you in the first place.

─── ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ⋅ ⋅ ───

Note: This is a little shorter than my normal fics, sorry. I really loved this idea and couldn't wait to write it, so I started it before remembering that I'm swamped with schoolwork. I'm so sorry, I hope that I did it justice even though it was a little rushed. Feel free to send in any more requests you might have!

[bouncybongfairy]

Not A Peep

Simon (Ghost) Riley x Fem Reader Smut

Summary: You're a medic on Task Force 141 and Ghost finds out you have a thing for him when you get flustered stitching him up. Once you guys get back to the barracks, he fucks your throat under a desk.

Word Count: 1.0k+

Ref Account: @kaionyx

TW: Dom Ghost, Face Fucking, Rough Smut, BJ Under Desk

<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3

It was easy to separate yourself from all the stories being told while studying to be a combat medic. Tales about women falling for soldiers and then being immortally traumatized from watching the war take its effect on him. Whether it be emotionally or physically, the horror stories were gruesome. One teacher talked about how she had to treat her fiance after he’d been shot in the arm, apparently it fucked her up for a while. In a way, you would mock the fact that anyone would put themselves in that situation. Falling in love with someone with such a high risk job. It seemed like common sense not to put your heart on the line, especially when it could affect your job. 

That was until I met Simon and you started to understand that those wives tales weren’t so far fetched. The two of you didn’t talk much but it always felt like there was so much tension. Constantly making eye contact, becoming flustered and tongue tied whenever he spoke to you. Avoiding him when you could, not liking the feeling of your heart racing when you did. He held so much emotion in his eyes, like he was projecting his thoughts through eye contact. On a recent mission, a bullet brushed past the area above his hip bone; creating a laceration that needed stitches. Barding into the tent and pulling his pants down and shedding his gear.

 Immediately you get on your knees, pulling everything you needed to treat him out of your tactical vest. Looking up just before starting the first stitch, he was already looking down at you. His eyebrows were furrowed and his eyes were narrowed onto you. Blood was running down, trailing down the contour of his v-line. Hands started shaking slightly, especially as he started to moan and curse in pain. Even though you were fully aware his reaction was from discomfort, you couldn’t but imagine if it… wasn’t. 

He was watching you like a hawk, swiveling his head to watch you whenever you grabbed gauze. All hope that he didn’t notice you acting flustered was ditched when you started feeling dizzy, swaying a little. He grabbed your arm to prevent you from falling, your partner taking over. Now back in the barracks, you took a long hot shower. Trying to figure out why you got so in your head, the water began to run cold. Prompting you to get out and get dressed, walking back into your room. Ghost who was stripped of gear, laying back on the bed supporting his weight with his elbows. 

“Do you need me to redress that for you?” you asked, assuming he was waiting to see you about his wound. 

“No. Do you need me to undress you?” he asked, sitting up. 

“I- What?” you asked, taken off guard. 

“Do you. Need me to. Undress you?” he asked slower, like you were too dumb to answer the question. 

“I don’t understand-” you began saying. 

“No no, I saw you today. The way your eyes widened when you were on your knees in front of me. The desperation and neediness was so potent I could practically smell it on you. I could have taken you right there if I wanted, forced myself into your throat. So hot and bothered you couldn’t even do your job, I consume your thoughts. Don’t act like I don’t” he said, backing you against the desk that was in the corner. 

“I don’t-” he interrupted. 

“Wanna say something you regret,” he said, running his thumb over your bottom lip. Dipping it into your mouth, feeling around to see your reaction, “I think it safe to say that if you didn’t want my cock, you wouldn’t be sucking my finger like a whore. Would you?” he asks, you shake your head and in response he gives you a sharp smack on the cheek.

“Would you?” he asks again, giving you a chance to correct your answer. 

“Yes sir,” you say, melting at the way he looked at you. 

“Good girl, get under the desk.” He said, which you did without hesitation. 

He unzipped his fly, struggling for a second to free his member but finally got there. Sitting down in the office chair, rolling into the small space under the desk. Completely trapping you inside the small space. No longer being able to see above his shoulders, not that it mattered when his cock was right in front of you. Every time your lips finally encased his tip, he would use his hand and pull it away. You reach up and try to take his length into your hand. His voice booming through the room as he pulls away a couple inches to look you in the eyes. 

“Put your fucking hand down, you haven’t done anything to deserve it,” he said, scooting back in, using his hand to guide your head down. 

After all the teasing, the feelings of his cock pushing past your lips felt like heaven. Ever since you met him all you could think about was him ravaging you. Using your body for whatever he wanted. A loud groan coming from the back of your throat, his other hand was stroking your cheek. Slowly starting to push your head down further, you gagged which made him chuckle. 

“Fuck, I knew i’d eventually have you gagging around my dick,” he cooed, letting his head fall back. You looked up, now being able to see his exposed jawline. Reaching your hand down and starting to play with yourself. Spreading your wetness around and circling your clit. Moaning as drool and pre-cum started sliding down his shaft. He grabbed your hair and starting to fuck your mouth. His eyes were rolling back, feeling feral hearing the wet slobbering and slapping sounds. There was a knock at the door which made you squeal and try to pull away. 

“Shhhhh!” He hisses before clearing his throat and answering the door. However just before he does, he presses your head down, applying pressure with both hands on the back of your head. Forcing your lips all the way down to the base of his cock. 

“Yeah!” he yelled, Soap opened the door but remained in the doorway. 

“Have you seen y/n? We have training soon,” Soap asked while you were digging your fingernails into his boots, swallowing around his length which hurt slightly.

“Yeah, I think she went to get some fresh air,” Ghost said, stars were forming in your vision. Soap thanked him and promptly exited and Ghost finally let you pull back. Gasping for air and wiping the tears out of your eyes. He moaned as the cold air hit his dick just after getting used to your hot throat. 

“That’s a good girl, just breathe. Yeah, you’re a such a good fucking girl,” he snarled and pulled you back down on you. 

He stood up and balled his fist in your hair, and pinning his hands onto the top of the desk. Essentially locking you into place and he obliterated your throat. Making sure your nose was pressed into his base with every thrust. Not bothering to pull his cock out as he started came. Warm cum flooding down your throat and into your stomach. He pulled out, not wasting any time putting his dick away. You rested your upper body on the now empty chair that sat in front of you. Ghost squatted down and grabbed your wet chin to look up at him before speaking, 

“Firstly, you should thank me for feeding you before training. Secondly, I didn’t make you cum because you left scratch marks on my boot,” he said, walking out of the room.

[prettysweetprettysweet]

i really do feel genuine queerness radiating from the narrative in Cherry Magic Thailand in a way that it might not have in other people's hands. the thing that truly roped me in from the beginning was how Karan's love for Achi, beyond the inherent goodness of it, also created a vast spectrum of negative emotion for Karan that most queer people could immediately recognize and sympathize with. specifically, how uniquely queer it is to have your love and attraction to someone be so closely married to terror at the thought of disgusting them that the concept and feeling of love is tainted for you in ways that it isn't for straight people.

i was hooked by episode 2 when Karan recognized that putting himself out there in even the smallest ways was causing Achi discomfort, and he resolved to just...settle. i can settle, i can settle, i don't need more than what we have right now. i won't make him any more uncomfortable than I already have. i'm being selfish, i need to retreat and keep a distance so he doesn't have to think about me when he doesn't want to, so he doesn't have to dwell on bad things.

he is so concerned with the thoughts and feelings of others that he constantly allows it to branch into self-denigration in relation to his queerness. like after he and Achi were forced to have physical contact by the party game, he's so preoccupied with Achi's fear and discomfort that one of the first things he says to him is "they shouldn't have made us play that game. what guy would be okay with kissing another guy?" and its like...Karan, you would! you would love to kiss the guy right next you and thats okay! to me it seemed like he was giving Achi a pass in case he was disgusted, like 'its okay if [my] queerness grossed you out just now.'

and as @poetry-protest-pornography pointed out here, Karan's confession of love is weighed down by so much negative emotion. right out of the gate, Karan is apologizing for having these types of thoughts and feelings about Achi, taking Achi's willingness over the past few weeks to get to know and be known by Karan as an act of charity, and apologizing for betraying his trust by wanting more. like, you gave me a good thing and i perverted it and made it bad. i'm so sorry.

this resonates with me so much because his internal dialogue was so similar to mine when i came out, but in the context of my relationship with my mother. in the months after i came out to her, every time i saw her i was looking for clues in her body language that confirmed my agonizing suspicion that she was disgusted by me. every time i saw her, my first thought would be 'she's thinking about it and she's disgusted with me, i'm gross to her.' and when i saw her minutely reacting to parts of my own body language that were too butch and masculine (that i hadn't really spent a lot of time thinking about prior to coming out), i vowed to start being more conscious of how i spoke and presented so that i wouldn't make her uncomfortable because i felt so, so bad about forcing her to associate me, her child, with something perverted and gross. Karan's instinct to be ashamed, apologetic, and remorseful for being himself and feeling his feelings makes this show so, so gay for me.

[ghoulfuckersincorporated]

Joshua Graham (Fallout: New Vegas, Honest Hearts DLC) NSFW Headcanons 2

(A follow up to this post from the other day because I've been continually plagued with thoughts about this man for the last few days...)

Terrible at dirty talk. He isn't incapable of saying things that you'll find erotic, things that'll turn you on, but intentional and explicit sexual talk is not a strength of his. Doesn't curse, nor does he really use crude nicknames for various body parts or sexual acts. The most you'll get out of him a lot of the time is a series of commands. The words "cock" and "cunt" do exist in his vocabulary, but they only slip out once in a rare while, usually when he's already turned on beyond rational thought, and you can always tell he's a little embarrassed to have said either of them once he's calmed down again.

Handsy when you're alone, and rather aggressively so. He wants you to constantly have his touch on your body fresh in your mind, so the moment you two leave camp or everyone retires for the evening he's teasing you physically every chance he gets. Pretty good at making a lot of his touches seem accidental, but oftentimes he fully abandons that pretense and lets it be fully known that he's intentionally trying to rile you up, which only riles you up more. His favorite move is to saddle up behind you and slowly slide a hand into your pants, playing with you until you literally can't stand properly before helping you back to your feet and going about his business.

Not the most adequate at romance due to his discomfort with the vulnerability it requires. Holding your hand and quoting Song of Songs is about as romantic as he gets face-to-face. Better with gestures that don't require him to perform them while you watch, but he's just not very traditionally romantic overall. He had a family that showed him a lot of love and care when he was young, but there were many years where the main forces in his life were violence and lies. That history doesn't exactly lend itself to poetic thinking, but he does try if you tell him that it's what you want. Will occasionally give you a bundle of flowers he picked, or a small tchotchke he found that he thinks you'd enjoy. Will also make frequent bids to get you to spend time with him. He isn't without ways to show he cares about you, but many of them won't be ways you're used to. He can be a tad more lovey-dovey during and after sex sometimes, but it requires him to be both relaxed and in a very good mood, conditions which are rarely both met at the same time.

Likes to think he's above thinking with his dick due to his impeccable self-control, but you quickly prove to him that he's not as infallible as he believes himself to be. This man would do a lot, and I mean a lot of things to see you on your knees with his cock in your mouth, and you're more than eager to use that knowledge against him. If he's upset with you, he'll do his best to avoid a situation where you can do so, because he's quite embarrassed at how easily he folds the second you tug on his fly. Scolds you for being such a debauched whore the first time you swallow his load, though soon he's all but making you swallow every time.

I spoke a few days ago about how I firmly believe Joshua is in the middle of becoming a ghoul, which is why his injuries from years prior "won't heal". The truth is that the burns have long healed; the sloughing and blistering in his flesh now is because he's in the middle of a long, painful transformation process. Finally exposing him to a little bit of radiation and demonstrating its ability to ease his pain will make him incredibly grateful; having grown up in the post-war world, he's always been taught to avoid extra radiation as much as possible, to avoid contact with questionable foods and stay out of the rain, and it would never occur to him to treat these things as therapeutic (largely because he's hesitant to accept what he's becoming).

Finally having a way to properly manage his pain will raise his spirits noticeably, at least relatively compared to how much he panics about what his new status says about his soul. But it'll also blow the lid straight off the Pandora's box that is his often-neglected sexual drive. Be ready to go from only being able to touch him once in a while when the wind blows right to him actively pursuing and propositioning you multiple times a week. He'd be thrilled to have the energy to fuck you the way he's always fantasized about.

[ohimsummer]

WHEN THEY HAVE A CRUSH ON YOU (boy vers!)

—   jean, armin, connie eren, levi, erwin

—  fluff, modern! au, a little explicit language

[fem + hange vers!]

: ̗̀➛ JEAN

He denies his crush on you at every turn. You’re his friend! Of course he likes hugging you and hanging out at your house late into the night, long after everyone else has went home. Jean tries to convince himself that everyone feels this way about their friends, or that it’s just a phase that will pass. Everyone has let their imagination run wild and wondered what it’d be like to start a family with their best friend!...right?

: ̗̀➛ ARMIN

Armin tries to distract himself from you, but always finds himself in your presence. Just as he’s rid himself of thoughts of your smile, your laugh, your pretty face, and can finally focus on his studies in the library, there you are: not even acknowledging him as you’re too intent on finding a specific book amongst the shelves. And there his thoughts go again, racing and wild and rampant with you.

: ̗̀➛ CONNIE

He sort of feels you wouldn’t like him back? You two are just friends, and best friends at that; he wouldn’t want to ruin your relationship by making things awkward with his feelings, so he just resorts to joking about it. Offers to be your boyfriend when you complain to him about some guy you stopped seeing, but is quick to go “I’m kidding!” when you look over at him. He always tries to play these things off, but you can tell by the way he looks at you sometimes that he’s an utter faker.

: ̗̀➛ EREN

Eren is frustrated with his feelings. He’s constantly fighting with himself that he doesn’t like you. You’re his best friend, no he doesn’t have fucking feelings for you?? Sometimes, you wonder why he pulls away from you so abruptly, or grumpily avoids eye contact with you while poorly hiding the red tint on his cheeks. He’s mentioned before that he doesn’t have feelings for you, so is he sick? Lovesick, maybe.

: ̗̀➛ LEVI

Levi shoves his feelings deep, deep down, and tries to treat you as he treats everyone else. But, no matter how much he forces himself to call you annoying, or shrug you off of him when you show him any physical affection, he struggles not to give in to your company, or give you such a soft look whenever he listens to you talk. He can’t help gazing at you in such a loving way, but you’ll never actually catch him looking at you this way.

: ̗̀➛ ERWIN

Similar to Armin, Erwin attempts to distract himself with work. He’ll spend long hours in the office and drown himself in paperwork when he gets home, but it doesn’t stop the visions of you from infiltrating his head whenever he’s not scribbling and reading over papers. You occupy every corner of his mind; he’ll find himself frozen and hunched over his desk, only to realize he was thinking of you, that gorgeous person working on the floor above him. 

[sharpth1ng]

Not anonymous cuz I'm not a pussy.

OK so is it just me or is it SO fucking annoying when stu macher gets turned into this stereotype alpha mf and billy is like a little subby "I love you.. b-but I hate you!!" It's just so like ughh!!! Gag me with a spoon why don't you?

Honestly this happens to both of them in fanon. I think there's a tendency to turn characters into generic archetypes rather than to consider their actually characterization. Especially when we're talking about archetypes around sexual/romantic dynamics and kink, there's a tendency to see a larger person and decide they're the one doing the penetrating, the one in control, being dominant, ect. And vice versa the smaller one is the one receiving, being less dominant.

When you think about it a lot of these associations are very gendered, even when they're applied to same gendered pairings. Masculine = larger, dominant and active, the one who initiates sexual interaction, the one who does the penetrating, and feminin= smaller, submissive and passive, the one who gets penetrated. I constantly see characters being altered to be portrayed more in-line with these kinds of tropes.

Honestly it's just boring to me lmao, but also it doesn't suit these characters the way I understand them. It's a lot more dynamic, exciting and true to life to mix up these dynamic imo. Like a smaller dominant character? Suddenly dominance isn't defined by physical force, the person submitting could chose to flip the script but they don't because they're choosing to give up power.

Similarly, having a submissive person be the initiator is really interesting. It allows for the fun of resistance/ that "I shouldnt" moment without it feeling predatory. The person trying to start things is asking to be hurt, to be used, they aren't trying to use the other person, and I think that really switches the power dynamic.

And again something similar applies to submissive tops and dominant bottoms.

With Billy and Stu what we see in the movie is that Billy is sort of the boss, Stu follows his orders but also Stu is the one who initiates physical contact with Billy in the kitchen scene. For a lot of the movie Billy is either in jail or pretending to be dead (and yes I think he stayed in that room while stu was chasing people around, it would have been a big problem if Sid had gone back up to that room and he wasnt there), so we also have Stu being an active doer. Stu is also the one who begs to be stabbed.

What this says to me about their dynamic is that Billy is the more dominant one, he's the boss, all of what's happening is essentially happening for him. That said, Stu is the more active partner despite being the more submissive one in general.

Even with Billy being the more dominant partner he's not completely in control, he constantly feels like he's being taken hostage by his own emotions and by his desire for Stu, which I think also creates interesting motivation for his need for control. this dynamic is why Billy allows Stu to have slightly more control sexually when he feels more secure and is allowing himself to have feelings for Stu.

But still the way these characters interact with dominance and submission is different because they are different characters. Billy's submission is bratty, he needs to be wrangled, and he talks back the whole time, whereas Stu also talks back but it's all baiting, begging, asking for more, and for the most part he'll follow orders without question. In contrast Stu's dominance is service oriented, its all about making Billy feel good while Billy's dominance uses more degradation (which makes Stu feel good).

Its also worth noting that the nature of their dynamic shifts back and forth over time ( and you'll see more of that happening in WoM), because the characters needs, insecurities, and levels of comfort shift over time. If the dynamic was always the same it would get old and repetitive fast.

At the end of the day fitting complex characters into archetypes isn't going to feel satisfying for most people, and allowing for characterization that expands outside of and mixes tropes from different archetypes results in a more compelling and realistic dynamic.

Alright thats a lot lmao I wrote another essay 😭

[honeym4rk]

skinship - kisses

in a relationship where your boyfriend finds physical affection rather awkward, you’d best believe it would’ve taken some time for him to warm up to the idea of skinship- skin to skin, a hand on his, cheeks crashing together as close as possible. but the patience comes at a good cost- mark has several ways to close the distance between you.

previous (lightswitch)

summary: it shouldn't be this hard to go about kissing mark.

-

something you never expected at the start of your relationship was mark’s initial hesitance to kiss you.

of course, naturally, it takes some time for two people to cross their own boundaries of comfort, to enter, invade, and conquer another’s territory of personal space. some people forego this careful caution in a budding relationship, and dive right into one another. neither you or mark are some people. 

and it’s not that you think mark is particularly bold: you know he isn’t very upfront and confident in expressing his feelings for you. you’ve known this from the very start, when his friends had to literally push him to ask you out, and the very awkward first conversation you had. you know he can get a bit shy, but part of you always thought, that every now and then, he’d have bursts of the courage that he has when he’s on stage. mark can definitely be suave, and cool, and charming, but mostly when he’s in his element and knows exactly what he’s doing.

right now, in this moment, he has no idea what he’s doing.

the credits of the Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle are starting to roll, and you’re stuck frozen in the burrow you’ve made in the fold of the sofa, head resting on his shoulder as his arm is wrapped loosely around your side. it’s been holding you like this since the halfway point of the movie- you didn’t notice, but he let out a sigh of relief and satisfaction when he succeeded in placing it there. he stretched, arms going as high as they possibly could, before his limb wandered and found its way pulling you closer to him. cliche, he knows, but a win for him nonetheless. he had to hold back his grin when you leaned into his body.

at first, you could feel his fingers ghosting the frayed threads of your jean shorts, like his wrist was stiff and his hand was afraid to open up so his palm would make full contact with the skin of your thigh. but as the movie progressed, and he constantly broke into his cute, little, hearty giggle that somehow sent his entire body into motion, his hand started to ease, fingers drumming on your supple skin, drawing circles on it, accidentally hitting it when he laughs a bit too hard.

he gulps, and breathes, “wow, that movie was not as bad as i thought it was.”

“yeah, it was pretty good.” neither of you make an effort to move out of the position. a slight shift could mean this rare moment of comforting proximity that you waited so long for would vanish in an instant, like a bubble popping after floating around in glee. so you force your head to continue facing the screen, eyes boring into the tiny, white words that are scrolling away. 

before you know it, even the credits have finally come to a close, and your eyes are fixated on the next netflix recommendation, Jumanji: The Next Level that’s about to play in 5, 4, 3, 2, 

your head snaps up to turn, still balanced on the ball of his shoulder. when you face him, you’re staring right at him. he does that stupidly attractive thing where he turns his head towards you before his eyes land on yours, and your eyes are now locked on his. you bite your lip to ease just a little bit of your restlessness, and this movement causes his eyes to dart to your lips for just a split second. 

he gulps again.

screw it, you’re gonna have to say something.

“are you gonna kiss me?” oh my god. not that. stupid, stupid, self-sabotage.

his hand flies away from your leg, retreating back to him so he can make huge, sporadic gestures that speak for his panic and awkwardness.

“uhhh, i-” his hand is rubbing at his nose, and though it’s dark and his head is turned away from you once again, the light from the television lets you see the pink tint that begins to dust his cheeks. “i mean, if you, if you, um, want me to,”

you don’t know why you find this so cute- you literally felt just as awkward as he does a second ago, but seeing him freak out somehow fortifies you to prod at him a little more. besides, you realise that if you don’t make a move now, after at least a month and a half of going out with him, mark’s probably never going to. 

your face scrunches up into a chuckle and you don’t take your eyes off him- “well, do you want to?”

“i mean, i-i totally do want to,” his hand is on his chest, and it comes down as he points at you with his thumb, “i’m just really scared that you- don’t? i don’t know,” mark leans forward from the couch to run his fingers through his hair, and you tug at his shirt sleeve multiple times to pull him back.

“i do, mark, i really do.”

“um, okay! great. cool,” he squeaks out, and his movements to almost close the gap between your faces are so mechanic, and panic settles onto his mind and his features, “oh, but i, uh, sorry if i’m a bad kisser or anything, i don’t really get much uh, practice in this, haha.”

you have to turn your face away to hold back a giggle at this cute, shy mess of a boy, before you finally compose yourself, and let one hand gently cup the side of his jaw, and reassuring, “it’s fine. sorry if i’m no good either.”

you smile, and plant the briefest kiss on the corner of his mouth. then you let go. 

“now, how was that?” 

“t-that wasn’t even a kiss!” 

“really?” you laugh, bringing your legs up onto the couch to kneel and face him completely. this time, you hold both of his cheeks in both of your hands before closing your eyes and pressing your lips on his, for a while longer now, and you’re just about to pull away when you feel fingertips ghosting up your jaw, and feel him tilt his head so that his mouth fits perfectly in the crevices of yours. 

“what about now?”

“better.”

he shifts his body to fully face you too, and your mouths meld together just a few more times, and the feeling of his fingers gripping at you, lips chasing after yours, drowns out the background noise of kevin hart bickering with dwayne johnson. you’re melted into this moment, and you don’t want it to end.

-

another thing you never really expected from mark was- well, his fear of sudden pecks, those that catch him off-guard, those that come when he least expects them to. they don’t give him any time to react, or prepare, or take a breath so he doesn’t combust when your lips touch his skin.

you’ve made out a few times with him so far in the couple of times you’ve seen him since that very night, and so you thought that he’d appreciate the quick, little kisses, but you probably shouldn’t have assumed.

he’s getting ready to leave your apartment after another movie night, and just before he walks out the door, he hugs you goodbye, and before he can pull back, you sneak a kiss on the tiny corner of his mouth that’s turned up into a smile. or at least, you try to.

he flings himself out of your grasp, head jerking back so fast and hard that you almost tumble into him from the momentum, and both of you stare in complete shock at one another.

“oh, ummm, sorrysorrysorry, haha, awwwkwaaaard!” your hands fly to the air in surrender as if you’ve been caught red-handed, and your feet take slow, tiny steps away from him.

“that’s my bad, oh my god i’m sorry,” your words are drowned out by his, and every cell in you is cringing from embarrassment and from worry and fear that you’ve done something wrong, something you shouldn't have done, did you go too far? are you stupid for thinking that would be okay?

“sorry, i, uh, i think it’s like, muscle memory to move away because haechan and the guys, well, mostly haechan, always tries to do that kinda thing. i-it’s not you! i swear! you’re great! haechan, not so, you know what i mean? like i wanna kiss you too but in that moment my body prepared for fight or flight, you know? oh my god i’m so sorry.” he’s doing that thing with his gestures again, frantically waving his hands to ensure you visually comprehend that it’s not your fault.

this revelation comes like a knife slicing through the tension that once was, and you hide your face behind your hands in relief, giggling at the stark weirdness of it all, but you also can’t shake off the tinge of sadness from the rejection. it wasn’t directed towards you, you know, but you just can’t help but feel a little taken aback by what happened. 

he grabs your wrists, pulling you towards him, and encouraging you to try again.

“okay, go on. i’m ready now. sorry. just not used to this.” his cheeks are a deep shade of red, and his eyebrows furrowed in concern.

you’re smiling throughout the entire, brief, kiss goodbye.

nearly six months have passed, and you try to give him a peck every now and then, just to see if he still retracts in fear, and you can see him tense up every time you try. 

so you stop. 

the last time you’d tried was right before he left for tour, and in your endless contemplation of your relationship (you had way too much time on your hands not to fall down the rabbit hole of thinking), you come to the conclusion that maybe it’s just something you don’t have to do to mark. with mark, for mark. besides, there are other ways to express your love for him anyways- he doesn’t cringe when you run your fingers through his hair, or when you wrap your arms around him in a bear hug from behind. probably because he doesn’t mind when his friends do it too. and it’s not like you can’t kiss him entirely, you just have to make sure he’s fully aware of the sparks that are about to fly when your lips touch, instead of the little zaps of static that come when he least expects them to, the ones that he shies away from.

-

it’s been a week since he’s returned. a week since your suffering has finally come to an end, a week since the longing that filled your entire being to the brim finally drained out when your body collided into his when you embraced after what felt like an eternity. it took everything in you not to jump at him when you saw him at your door, so instead of fighting against your growing excitement, you run straight into his arms, hopping as his hands link together to prop you up. 

it’s hard not to tear up- the sight of mark in the flesh is overwhelming and sensational and you’re burying your face into his neck, hands playing with the hair at his nape. what used to be short, clipped ends that pricked at your fingers have now grown into something like a mullet- you remember when you saw photos of him online the other day and started crying because it was a reminder of just how much time was passing without him around. you’re crying, now, too, and mark starts to giggle you can hear just how tired he is from the grogginess of his voice- “aw, babe, are you crying?” 

“no.” he tries to nudge at you so you can pull your head back, but you stick to him like a koala wrapped around a tree until he lets go of your legs and tries to tickle you.

“awwwww, nooo! you’re making me want to cry too!” he whines, and you wipe your tears away on the sleeve of your sweater before finally looking up at his face through your glossy eyes. his face has changed, too. his eyebags are puffy, his cheeks are sunken in the slightest bit, and his jawline is more prominent than you remember it to be. his face feels just a little smaller in your hands when you hold him, and you’re staring, wondering if it’s been so long that you’ve simply forgotten the tactile sense of touching him, feeling him.

before this can spur any more tears from escaping, you’re sent into overdrive, since he crashes his lips into yours. the initial shock flickers out and you take in the jolts of electricity coming at you, the storm of repressed zeal and yearning unleashing between the two of you. it’s been so long and yet you can still remember how mark kisses- when he turns his head to nip at more of you, his arms link around your shoulders, and then the next time one hand cups your face, his thumb trailing up and down your jaw, and eventually his mouth strays away from yours, and he plants kisses all over your face, trailing down to your neck, and then… he doesn’t have to tell you he missed you for you to know.

you’ve seen him almost everyday since he’s come back- he likes to come over just to catch up on sleep in your room as you study. just so you can spend a little more time in your day with one another. there have been more cuddles, more back massages (you even gave him one this time), more sitting in his lap, and he even tries to pick up the skill of braiding your hair. so far, you’ve stuck to your resolution of not stealing pecks out of the blue- so the only thing there isn’t more of is kisses. it’s good, you think- you let him initiate and then you return, so you’re sure you don’t have to take him by surprise.

tonight, you’re in the middle of submitting an assignment, when you hear your phone ping from across the room. then it pings, again and again, in succession, and you’re about to go over and read the messages before it blows up into a full phone-call, the marimba ringtone blaring through the speakers. 

it’s johnny, and in the split second before you answer the phone, you can only assume the worst has happened- you know mark’s with him, they had a company dinner to celebrate the end of their tour- what, did he get into an accident? did he pass out? did he-

“hello? y/n?” there’s a sense of urgency in his voice, and the curiosity is really starting to eat you alive.

“hey, john, what’s up? is everything okay?” you hear a groan in the background, and it turns into a long, howl-like wail that subsides into sob.

“yeah, uh, not really. you heard that? that’s uh, it’s mark. i think he’s had too much to drink, and it’s not like he’s never gotten drunk before, he’s definitely had more before, but i’ve never seen him this, uh-”

“is that y/n?!” you can hear mark hiccup, “y/n! baaaaaaby babe y/n!” he’s still crying, and you’re so worried. mark hasn’t really expressed much sadness ever since he returned, and most of the time he’s very frank with his emotions- so if he was ever sad about anything, you’d think you would’ve heard about it by now.

you can hear someone else shushing him, and johnny continues- “i think he really wants to see you right now, so can we just drop him off at yours? you can just text me your address, i don’t think he’s in a state of mind to give directions right now.” the sobbing is still ongoing, albeit a tiny bit more muted than it was before.

“um, yeah. of course. i’ll send it to you. is.. is he alright? what happened?” 

“well, i’m not very sure, actually. he was fine at the start, and then started to get all giggly like he normally does when he’s had a few glasses, and then he had a tiny bit more, and got all sappy. and now we’re uh, we’re here. he does keep mentioning that he misses you, though. which i don’t get- since i’m pretty sure he spent the entire week with you, so….”

“right….okay. thanks johnny. has he like, thrown up or anything?”

“uhh, nope. don’t think so. hopefully he doesn’t. or hopefully he does. he’ll probably feel better after.” 

“yeah. you can call me when you get here, i’ll buzz you in. see you!” 

you hang up, and are left alone only with the many questions you have, and wow, you’ve never felt more nervous in your entire life. not when you did that interview for a scholarship, or when you had your finals, or when you drove for the first time. this imminent fear is much more terrifying- especially because you were under the presumption that you knew exactly what was happening. in everything else you feared the unknown, the uncertainty of it all, but this, you feel like you were supposed to know- you thought there was nothing between you and mark, thought he was just as transparent as you had been with him.

this week had been complete bliss for you, having him in close proximity again. you’re treasuring every moment with him much more now, holding everything right to your heart, actively storing every scene of him in your hippocampus for later viewing. what could’ve gone wrong? was that not enough? what’s changed? you can only wander around your apartment as your mind runs wild. is he stressed? is this some cathartic release? does he suddenly hate what he’s doing? 

the wait is painfully long- almost making the four months without mark cease to nothing, and you try everything not to think about him. you submit the assignment, you try to beat your record on minesweeper, you watch a couple of youtube videos but lose interest, and text a close friend for emotional support. before the soul-crushing impatience can actually kill you, you hear the ringing on your intercom, and you’ve never pressed the accept button so fast. 

you don’t even wait for them to ring your doorbell. that would just cause more delay. you open the door right away, and peek outside, and the lift doors burst open and mark’s whines reverberates along the tight corridor. johnny’s carrying him piggyback, and the sight of him like this makes you so, incredibly sad- it pulls at your heartstrings and you feel suffocated by the tightening hold that it has on you. if he wasn’t so upset, maybe you would’ve laughed at how cute and snug he looks stuck onto johnny’s back.

mark’s face morphs into a giddy smile when he sees you, letting out a garbled call for you, and you greet johnny as he slips his shoes off to carry him into the living room and plop him onto the couch. you begin to untie his shoe-laces so you can get his shoes off, and you sigh, “thanks so much for your help johnny. do you need anything? need a glass of water… or?” 

“no, i’m good. taeil’s waiting downstairs, anyway.” 

you walk him to the door with mark’s shoes, placing them right at the entrance. “right. well, um, thanks again! hope you guys get back safe. i’ll see you around.” 

“yup, see you. hope he’ll be okay.”

the door is shut, and you can finally focus all your attention on the boy that’s caused you so much concern in the past thirty minutes. you sit right by his head on the couch, and when you try to get rid of the denim jacket he’s wearing, he stirs.

“baaabe?”

“hey, markie. what’s got you all upset?” you kneel on the floor so you can slip the jacket right off of him, and his swollen, tear-filled eyes are following you as you move. when you get close enough, you’re taken aback because he smooches you, missing your lips completely, and the sweet, gentle kiss lands on your chin. 

it’s the first time he’s ever done that- first time he’s ever gone in for a kiss without you looking- and you have to sit and blink to try and figure out if you’re imagining things.

his hand reaches out for you, lips still puckered as he tries again and again to kiss you anywhere on your face, and as intriguing as it is, it’s more concerning since it’s mark. your mark- the one that didn’t really seem to like it when you did this, the one who pretty much repelled away from any of the sudden pecks you gave him. 

you sweep his hair to the side, and before you can even try asking again, his hand falls limp, and he drawls, “you don’t wanna ki-kiss me anymore.” tears are starting to well in his eyes again, and you have to force yourself not to give up on how confusing this entire situation is.

“what? babe, who told you that?” you’re chuckling, but trying not to, because he’s literally about to cry ohmygodwhat. 

“yoooooou,” he whines, “you haven’t kissed me since i, i got back!”

you brush a tiny droplet from his eye with the pad of your thumb, and then go back to stroking his hair. you try not to show your incredulity, but it’s a little hard when you have absolutely no idea what he’s talking about. “but i have! we even kissed yesterday, mark! remember?” 

“yeaaah we kissed! but i kissed you.” he’s so funny- even as his eyes are closed and he faces the ceiling, he still has to point at himself and then at you when he says this, and then he pauses and continues, “you haven’t tried to kiss me since i left. like, reeeaaally tried. and i can’t figure out whhhhhy.” 

oh. what? 

“well, markie, right now i don’t really wanna kiss you since you’re kinda stinky,” you try to joke, but his eyes shut even tighter and he’s about to burst into tears again, “noooooo! i’ll go brush my teeth-”

“but didn’t you say you’re not used to it? i didn’t wanna make you uncomfortable. you didn’t seem to like it very much.”

“but i diiiiiid! i missed you so much when i was away,” a hiccup. “and then i felt so sad,” another hiccup. “because i remembered how sad you got the first time,” and another hiccup. “and then when i got back i was soooo excited for you to do it, so i could do it back to you, and you never did.” his mouth turns into a pout, and his nose sniffles.

this is what he was upset about? no way. there is no way he got so sad because you decided not to kiss him out of the blue anymore. it makes your heart swell in confusion- because, what the hell, mark is just, for the lack of a better word, so darn cute. you can’t believe that this, out of everything you could’ve had a miscommunication about, is what he was hiding from you. 

“awwww, i’m sorry babe. i really thought you didn’t want me to.” you coo, and lean in closer to press your lips to his forehead. “look! i’ll give you sooo many right now!” you kiss him all over his face, and the corners of his mouth turn up into a smile, and he starts to giggle, complaining that it tickles. 

“but why didn’t you tell me? i would’ve done it if you’d asked.” you begin to trace your finger all over his features, stopping at his nose to boop at it. 

he heaves out a sigh, and you can tell he is a mere minute away from dozing off to sleep with how slowly he speaks, “i dunno, it just seemed silly to tell you. but this, it’s probably even sillier.” 

you pinch at his nose. “yeah, i’m glad you know, mark.” 

you know you once said that a small peck on the lips didn’t mean much to you, but right now, it’s your favourite way of showing him you care. just the thought of both of you unknowingly reciprocating the exact same yearning for each other is so amusing, and it gives you butterflies to know just how similar you are to one another. it’s more than simple skin on skin- it’s when two lines, so parallel and alike, tend towards one another and meet in an oblique. and though these lines have to part afterwards, they curve, bend, and loop to find their way back. you’ve never believed in infinity- it’s stupid to think that anyone or anything is completely limitless- but in this moment you can only wish for your lines to join and travel endlessly.

when you return with a face towel to wipe his dried tears and snot away, you give him your sweetest, last kiss goodnight.

-

a/n: ahhhhh lol sorry for taking a while for this update (if anyone's been waiting hahahah) i was busy with exams and decided to finally take a break to finish writing this! i've started to realise that every time i start writing i feel so accomplished, and then by the time i get to the end i just feel like the end product is disappointing aaghdaghag lol

[rottendollface]

Smoke Relationship Headcanons

Character: Smoke | Tomas Vrbada.

Warnings: NSFW, fem!reader, dom!Tomas, toxic relationship, jealousy; mental and physical abuse; unprotected sex, thoughts of baby trapping, oral sex; the action takes place before Bi-Han's betrayal, 18+.

• Tomas, who is searching for a civilian woman on purpose. He knows how to make a good impression, and he is well aware of his soft, lovely appearance. Once he has his eyes on you, he will act his best only to lure you into his trap.

• Tomas knows whom to target. He doesn't want a strong woman. He wants a shy, soft girl, a damsel in distress, so he can be her hero; but don't be fooled by such a valiant motive: the more he saves you, the more you owe him, and he won't hesitate to charge you for everything he has ever done to you.

• He lies about his background shamelessly. For you, he is a good guy, Tomas, who works as a policeman in a neighborhood district department. What about his family? His mother and sister tragically perished, and he was adopted by family friends. Tomas is a nice guy, and so are his brothers. He never tells you the names, dates, and places – and you can't even notice it because Tomas just doesn't shut up. He tells you so many things that you constantly lose the plot. However, from you, he expects to hear the whole story with all the following facts.

• Tomas is very caring with you. He assures you that you can trust him all your worries and your mind. His words are sweet, and his hands are gentle when he touches you. Tomas helps you with everything – you don't even have to ask. He is perfect, but he does it only to learn your weaknesses. Got too emotional and told him about your mental struggles? Tomas will make a note on how to put you into stress. Shared your fears with him? He is already planning on how to use it against you to make you vulnerable.

• He always belittles himself in front of you to hear you praising him. You put your whole pure soul into the kindest words he has ever heard in his life. Sometimes, he thinks that even his mother loved him less than you do. You are a marvelous persona, and he does everything in his might to become like you. Staying in your presence feels like basking in the Sun, and Tomas wants to become a better person for you. Did you really believe it? Well, it's better for him. Tomas does it on purpose – he gives you a false feeling of being a savior, an angel in a relationship to make your bond feel special.

• Does Tomas love you? Of course, he does, but the way he shows it is a little... different. He was raised by people who massacred his family. Since childhood, he had to kill to survive. He is a disgusting, sick creature, a predator who lives by animal impulses. Tomas doesn't know love in its normal way. He is afraid to lose you due to this reason, so he is hunting you in a different way: he wants to bind you to himself, make you addicted to him. Tomas will succeed, he believes.

• Tomas is jealous of you. He hates every man for looking at you, he hates you for being so kind with everyone around you, and he hates himself for allowing you to walk everywhere you want. It would be better for him if you were isolated from society. Tomas starts to scare you with police statistics on assaults on young women; he asks you to be extra careful when you leave your home, recommends you to give him access to your location, controls your outfits and makeup. You can shine with your beauty only when he is around, and while he isn't with you, you are allowed to wear something neutral so as not to draw attention to yourself. If you want to party with your friends, he has to know all their phone numbers and be in constant contact with you: if you aren't answering his messages for more than an hour, he will call you until you pick up. Tomas is aware that it scares you to see so many missed calls, and he does it to force a guilt on you. You have to excuse yourself and leave for half an hour in the best case to call him back, mentally prepared to hear his annoyed voice.

"...was found in an alleyway with her throat slashed."

"...her eyes were gouged."

"...drugged her drink and then raped her unconscious body."

Begging him to stop won't give you any results. Tomas wants you to remember once and for all: without him, you can easily become a heroine of tragic news reports. He will continue to intimidate you until you become too scared to exist in society.

• In relationship fights, he uses dirty tricks. Tomas gives you silent treatment to provide you an opportunity to think about your actions and goes on missions, keeping his phone turned off. It drives you crazy – every time you are afraid that he will be injured, and you will be the last to know about it. You would prefer him to scream at you than look you over and keep silent.

• Sometimes, when you two are not fighting, but starting to argue, he grabs your hands or claws his fingers in your shoulder dangerously close to your neck. Tomas is a strong man with an impressive physique – and some of his touches leave bruises on your skin. You ask him to be more careful with you, yet it goes unheard by him. His way to say sorry in this situation is to kiss each bruise after it gets its beautiful cornflower-blue color with purple streaks. The tenderness in his lips when he is doing that makes you think that Tomas likes to hurt you.

• Still, Tomas is a good husband material! He provides you, always makes sure your fridge is full of the best food. With Tomas, you don't have to worry about money. He will easily pay for your education and your cravings.

Tomas is traditional and believes that you should be a stay-at-home mother for your future children. To be honest, in Lin Kuei, you will have nothing else to do but to watch after kids. Sometimes, he dreams of leaving the clan and living with you like his parents did. One day, when it will be safe for him and you will have nowhere to run, he is going to tell you the whole truth about himself.

• Talking about children, Tomas loves the idea to be a family man. His foster parents made sure to raise all of the sons this way. It is also a good way to chain you to him. Constantly pregnant, you will have no other way but to stay with him.

• Tomas just feels the urge to breed you. Like an animal in rut, he won't cum anywhere, but inside you. Want it or not, he will force his seed in your womb. Tomas is the type to sabotage your birth control if you take any and impale condoms. He will find the words to assure you to have unprotected sex – he knows you so well he can convince you in everything.

• Tomas lives to grope you. He adores the way his big palms squeeze your buttcheecks, this delicious fat taking the form of his hands. He will grab you by your thighs when you sit next to him, making his way in between your legs by pressing on your skin roughly, impelling you to spread them.

• Thigh-sex from behind is a must for him: just one thought of his dick nestling in between your sweet inner thigs, right under your dripping pussy, gives him a boner. Your slick makes it easy to move, and Tomas shamelessly uses it for his pleasure. For you, it is nothing more, but a sweet torture, as you feel his throbbing length rubbing under your awaiting hole. You beg him and whine for him, but Tomas just grabs you by your hands, making you arch your back, and goes faster, bringing his climax closer.

• He won't go further without oral. Expect him to eat you out until you go stupid. Tomas is an expert in what he is doing: toying with your clit by sucking, munching and licking on it, he is then sliding his tongue down to your hole. Stuffing you with his saliva and tongue, he changes it on his thick fingers when it's time to go back to your trembling clitoris. He will slide up and down, his tongue flat to cover all the parts of your pussy.

Tomas expects you to give him head back after he finishes with you. The clouded gaze with heavy eyelids you give him when your plump pink lips close on the tip of his dick makes it more erotic. He is training you to take all of him in your mouth in one go, yet it brings Tomas more pleasure when you're starting at the tip and slowly making it down to the base, letting his length into your hot tight throat. You are sucking him, trailing every vein with your tongue. Saliva is streaming down from the corners of your mouth to your chin, making bubbles – Tomas is watching you with attentive eyes, memorizing every detail. Tomas is the type to grab you by your hair and start fucking your mouth roughly, enjoying you choking on his cock.

• No matter the position, Tomas is always in control of you. His hands never leave your body, helping you to adapt to his pace instead. Yet Tomas' favorites are doggy and missionary. For him, deeper penetration means better chances to make you pregnant. Taking you from behind allows him to go rougher on your poor cunt, that certainly will be swollen by the end of the intercourse. Pulling you on his cock, Tomas shivers at the feeling of your wet walls spasming around his length. His head is spinning when he sees his seed leaking out your red and messy pussy. Tomas pushes it back with his fingers, watching you squirm under him, as he is stuffing your already sensitive insides. For sure, he will go on you for another round, fucking his cum at the deepest parts of your womb.

• Every time you fall asleep by his side, Tomas is thinking about introducing you to his reality. It will be a long, painful process of your complete disappearance from previous life. Saying goodbye to old friends and family is never an easy task, but you will do it for Tomas – he will gladly help you with it.

[inktailsaystuff]

Kaveh and Alhaitham Relationship Headcanons~

Tw: none

Pre-relationship~

Alhaitham was the #1 Kavetham denier

Kaveh was aware of his feelings and just kinda moped about it

Poor man thought Alhaitham didn't like him back so he would just be all sad

Alhaitham was in denial

He didn't even realize that he had been crushing on Kaveh for the longest time

He just thought that he had grown attached

Kaveh brings Alhaitham food whenever he goes out (THIS AINT A HEADCANON THIS IS CANON AND WE ALL KNOW IT)

Alhaitham's face is on like every page of Kaveh’s sketchbook

They bicker a lot but the moment Alhaitham thinks he's genuinely hurting Kaveh he gets all apologetic and switches topics

Because Alhaitham doesn't talk to people a lot Kaveh didn't really get jealous when someone flirted with Alhaitham

BUT ALHAITHAM- 

Naur this man was so down bad without even knowing it if someone got too “close” with Kaveh he would try to one-up whoever the offending person's intelligence

Everyone but Alhaitham can see how Kaveh is desperately pining after him

No one can see Alhaitham pining after Kaveh other than Nahida 

They just think it is an L for Kaveh and many people tell him to move on

(Kaveh does not move on)

When Kaveh gets too drunk and starts getting sad Alhaitham will “rEluCtanTly” console him.

Cyno and Tighnari have a bet on who will confess first because Tighnari heard with his massive ears Alhaitham consoling Kaveh while he was blackout drunk

Eventually Nahida steps in, after watching Alhaitham read every book in the library to try and figure out what his feelings are

Alhaitham denies the claims, and Nahida just is like: You gay. 

Kaveh confesses first and has this whole rant where he's like “I know you don't feel the same way and you can kick me out of your house.” 

Alhiatham just went “I like you too.” he won at life and was having an internal party

Cue awkward staring 

Alhaitham just kinda asked if Kaveh wanted to kiss and they did 

Dendro gays are official :D

Relationship~

They have separate rooms but despite that, Kaveh likes sleeping in Alhaitham's room since he likes being close to him

Alhaitham likes having Kaveh’s presence nearby

Alhaitham actually struggles to sleep if he can't feel Kaveh’s presence nearby 

When they get into an argument Alhaitham will steal Kaveh’s keys to force Kaveh to talk to him

Despite his appearance, Alhaitham requires at least one physical contact a day with Kaveh, aka buff abs man needs a kiss to function 

Alhaitham does not want Kaveh to move out, one time Kaveh mentioned it, and Alhaitham just flat-out said you're not leaving. 

Alhaitham doesn't do much physical contact but he just likes having Kaveh near him, like as long as Kaveh is within arms reach he is happy

They will have dates where Alhiatham reads and Kaveh draws him

Alhiatham fills Kaveh’s sketchbook more than ever 

Alhaitham likes looking at the drawings Kaveh made

Kaveh constantly gets hit on by other men because of how feminine he looks and Alhaitham just kinda glares

He wont say anything to get people to back off, he’ll just glare or move closer to Kaveh

Alhaitham is so soft for Kaveh its like wild and at the same time hes the biggest jerk to Kaveh

One of their love language is bickering, 

No you can't change my mind

They will nitpick each other's tastes but never go as far as to actually hurt each other's feelings

When Kaveh cries Alhaitham just throws all his brain cells out the window, now he is just fussing over Kaveh, holding him and whispering reassurances his brain turns to mush and the only thought is to make Kaveh feel better

If anyone other than Kaveh knew about this he would kill himself he never wants this to get out

Inktail’s Dendro bonus of a wedding plan~

They both get each other rings, well Kaveh makes his for Alhaitham, and Alhaitham just buys one.

Kaveh took on like a million commissions so he could get the materials for the ring

He has an entire sketchbook dedicated to ring designs

Alhaitham just gets a simple gold ring with their names engraved (it costs more mora than the rent)

Alhaitham proposes first and after calming down a Kaveh crying from joy Alhiatham receives his ring. 

While it is somewhat bedazzled and has a pair of jewels Alhiatham still wears it since Kaveh gave it to him  

Kaveh got a green jewel that matched Alhaitham’s boob gem 

Kaveh cried at their wedding, 

Alhaitham was internally combusting at their wedding

Nahida was the officiator

Collei was the flower girl

And Scaramouche was the makeup artist

[bluesgrxce]

Yandere (machine-ish?) Connor Headcanons

I love soft deviant Connor like anyone else does, but machine Connor is sooo,,, omgggggggg..... I've been holding in my thoughts about him for so long that it's unhealthy. So I went for a Hannah Montana best of both worlds kinda thing. What if Connor acted like a deviant around you, but a machine towards everyone else?

How this happens is something I can't quite explain. Connor probably couldn't, either. To everyone else, an android is either a machine or a deviant-- There's no such thing as an inbetween. He would have agreed with this prior to bonding with you. You probably treated him in a way that nobody else did, sympathizing with him on a deeper level or making him question his morals, so he can see why that would push him to deviancy. 

But when you're not around, all those overwhelming emotions he felt just fade away. The mission goes back front and center to his priorities. He only feels two things at that point: confusion that runs his LED wild and desire for you that makes his thirium pump pound even when he's not in motion. Nobody else can bring about such reactions within him. 

He runs plenty of diagnostic checks in an attempt to figure out what's wrong with him. At one point, he'll try to avoid you and force himself into staying a machine, but that just makes him less efficient because he'll constantly worry about you instead. 

He would eventually accept himself as a deviant, but only so he wouldn't have to take orders from Cyberlife anymore. He doesn't want anything standing between the two of you. But he still largely acts like a machine and he doesn't mind that at all. He just sets his new mission to making you entirely his... 

Even once Connor sees his emotions as real, it's still his natural instinct to mask them. Especially negative ones like anger, sadness, and jealousy. He wouldn't want to show them unless they benefit his situation somehow, such as if he wanted to persuade or intimidate you/others. Emotions only matter to him if they're useful. 

For example, he *does* feel the desire to show affection towards you, and he will do it. He'll compliment you whenever you do something admirable. He'll reassure you and show geniune worry whenever you're upset about something. He'll even study romance media just to learn how to act more natural in the relationship (He thinks that'll help him act more natural, anyway... Lord help you if he gets his hands on Twilight 💀 But if the Bryan Dechart Twilight commercial is anything to go off of, he'd look good as a vampire, at least). 

But he doesn't do that stuff simply because he loves you. He does it because he knows your relationship benefits from it and you'll likely leave him if you feel neglected. He wouldn't bother if he knew it wouldn't keep you around. So if your relationship isn't exactly consensual in the first place, well... 

Which makes him sound pretty manipulative, right? You have no idea. 

Connor's android abilities give him a terrifying amount of advantages as a yandere. The first thing is that he always analyzes you when you enter the room, even though that often means analyzing you multiple times a day. It never bores him because he always manages to discover something new. Sometimes he'll blurt out random comments and you'll have to do a double take because he makes it easy to forget that he's obsessed with you.

"Your birthday is coming up soon. You might already know I'm aware of that type of information, but you should still bring it up with me. Otherwise I'll have to start believing I can't trust you and I'll have to make my own investigations." 

"Your heart rate goes up every time I touch you like this. I didn't realize physical contact was so important to human relationships. Don't worry, I won't stop. I won't let anyone stop me."

"Your serotonin levels are at an all-time low... Clearly, it can't be my fault, since I've done everything I am sure a good boyfriend would do. I'd like you to be honest when you tell me what's wrong this time."

The red flags fly higher as time goes on. He'll stop talking about all these observations if you tell him to, but he'll keep analyzing you anyway. 

Connor is enamoured with your DNA, as well. It helps him feel closer to you, which can often be difficult for him since he's not human. So if it belongs to you, and it can fit, it's going in his mouth. He'll do gross shit like keep your used lollipop sticks in his pocket so he can sample them whenever he wants. There's only one emotion he can't feel no matter what you do: shame. 

The invasive behavior doesn't stop there. He'll invite himself into your home and go through your things. He'll keep asking questions and trick you into revealing more information about yourself than you should. Knowing everything there possibly is to know about you gives him a stronger feeling of control for a single reason...

Your chance of escape plummets as he learns more about you, because it allows him to predict your behavior. He'll get scary accurate if you let him get close to you. This mostly benefits him in situations where he believes you want to leave him, or you did leave him, so he can figure out what you plan to do/already did and find the best method to get you back. If you already did leave, he'll examine your recent whereabouts like it's a crime scene and use his reconstruction ability. Even if you're insanely careful, he'll probably find a clue that'll lead him to you.

But sometimes he'll do it in normal situations, too, just as a silent guessing game. For instance: '(Y/N) will enter the police station at 8:18AM. I'm waiting for them at the entrance, so they'll greet me, but speed-walk away and avert eye contact. They'll head into the break room at 8:19AM and pretend to look around a bit, so Gavin won't make fun of them when they go for the same snack they always do. Gavin will make fun of them anyway and they'll argue for two minutes. Then--'

He has to stop thinking so he can greet you when you enter the building. Exactly at 8:18AM. He smirks to himself, only to drop into a frown when he hears Gavin's distant obnoxious laughter afterward. 

Remember how Connor once analyzed Hank's food and advised him against eating it? He does stuff like that to you all the time. And if you actually take the advice he gives, he'll take that as an opportunity to become more controlling. Oh, but only for the sake of your health, of course...

"You know, you shouldn't sit in that type of position. Bad posture can lead to health issues later on in life." "Then how should I sit?" "...It'll be easier if I show you." 

And so he'll help re-position you, using that as an excuse to touch you. He would especially do this if you weren't yet in a relationship, because he knows that as the type of android he is, he doesn't have a good reason to do so. The touch only lasts a brief moment. It's not inappropriate at all, and his grip was quite gentle. But it's weird that he went out of his way to do in the first place and that's all you might need to feel uncomfortable about it. 

But a lot of that is based off of the assumption that you're human. If you're an android, he still manages to find invasive things to do against your will. For one thing, he loves probing your memory. It's already difficult to lie to him and get away with it, but that might make it impossible, depending on what you're lying about. He doesn't care that it's an invasion of privacy and will do it if he finds a good excuse to do so.

Connor keeps an eye on your stress level and uses it to his advantage. He prefers to use persuasion when convincing you to do something, (he knows how to negotiate, after all) but he'll ultimately turn to intimidation if necessary. Which means heading straight into interrogation mode. 

This won't happen unless you're extremely rebellious, but if it does, he doesn't hold back. He'll treat you like you're a sick criminal, yelling at you, pushing blame and guilt onto you, and using physical force. 28 stab wounds type shit. He would avoid raising your stress level to 100% since he knows it could drive you to do crazy things, but that still doesn't make his actions okay. 

Even if you're really sensitive to that sort of treatment-- hell, even if you have some kind of trauma related to it-- he pushes away what little guilt he feels. He promises not to do it again "as long as you don't force me to." Actually, though, it encourages him to do it more. He knows it works against you now. 

His abilities don't stop there. He can mimic your voice using his vocal imitation, and all the voices of your loved ones, too. He went out of his way to meet them all, just in case he needs to trick you in the future. He likes being prepared. 

There are times when he's alone and he'll say stuff in your voice just so he can hear what it would sound like, such as, "I love you, Connor." Once again, he doesn't feel shame. Even if that seems pathetic. 

Let's just say it now. You cannot physically fight back against him. Maybe you'll have a chance if you're an android, but he knows about his advantage very well. He won't hesitate to remind you if you try getting aggressive. But even if you manage to get rid of him once, there's another model waiting to take his place. 

On a related note... I hope you never meet RK900. We only saw that guy for a minute, he said absolutely nothing in that minute, but the whole fandom has agreed that he's a menance. I fully agree. RK900 is definitely different from Connor, but they still have just enough similarities for him to get attached to you, too. Get help while you still can. 

The video of Bryan Dechart dancing as Connor lives rent free in my mind. I watch it on repeat like an iPad kid watching Friday Night Funkin' YouTube Kids videos. My brain just melts and I can't think of anything else. No, this isn't me simping for Bryan Dechart. This is me wanting Connor dancing to be canon. A girl can dream.

[clarina04]

From the very first moment, Winnix was the ship that stole my heart for very obvious reasons, which I won't go into now, because on the one hand everyone has already shared their opinion on this and I have nothing new to say, and on the other hand this is not what i want to talk about now anyway, but about why I think Winters and Roe could be the second most perfect pair in the show.

I think we can all agree that Winters has been a father/big brother figure to Easy company from the very beginning. He looked out for everyone, encouraged people, poured spirit into them and we, the audience, felt it too. When Winters is present, nothing can go wrong. We are all safe. You know that feeling, right? I felt that way the first time I watched this show. Every time Winters appeared, I felt a strange calmness in my heart, because just like his people, I trusted him completely. His charisma, his speech radiated strength, confidence and calmness. I felt that he was the perfect leader in every aspect and that Easy company couldn't wish for a better one. He nurtured people's souls to have the courage to keep fighting and thanks to his personality, in most cases he succeeded. And there was Eugene Roe, who was also in charge of saving people, but he was responsible for their physical, not their mental health. Whenever somebody was injured, he was there to help and just like Winters, he was also a kind of protective force, who when people saw him, they were at ease, because they knew that if he was there, nothing wrong could happen.

And why did I say that I think he and Winters could be the second most perfect match? Well, because they complement each other in every aspect and because the kind of care they have for people is perfectly exemplified when they practice it on each other.

Roe takes care of Winters when his leg was injured, giving him instructions, telling him to rest it, he looks after him even when they are not fighting, offers him coffee/soup and -I must mention- whenever Eugene is in a protective role for Winters, he always makes physical contact with him, touching his arm, shoulder or back, expressing his care for Winters, which I think is very special, because Eugene seemed to be quite aloof, keeping a few steps away from everyone, (which is understandable, as it must have been terribly difficult for him to watch his companions die one after the other or suffer injuries so severe that he couldn't help them, so he preferred not to form close friendships, because he couldn't bear to see his closest friends die in front of him) but with Winters, he behaved differently... more intimate.

He wasn't even afraid to yell at and lecture Winters and Welsh in the 5th episode for not paying attention to how many ampoules of morphine they had given Moose when he was accidentally shot (Eugene actually tossed both of them out of the way before getting in the back of the car, not caring that he was talking to officers).

And Winters, like for everyone else, was constantly watching Eugene, and this is most noticeable in episode 6, because this episode focused on him, trying to show what war is really like from the perspective of a medic. What a gruesome feeling it is to see your companions frozen in blood, what it is to get your hands dirty with their blood while you have no idea if they will survive, what it is to run from one place to another while you hear desperate cries for help, what a terrible strain it is to look after everyone, to keep track of their needs, to pour soul into them, to get through the unbearable circumstances with them, the hunger, the harsh weather, the constant fear of death... It's a hellishly stressful and soul-crushing situation for Eugene, which is most apparent in this episode, because as time goes on and more and more people around him die, he gradually becomes more and more desperate, more and more hopeless, more and more tired, so much so that when Welsh gets injured, he completely freezes and stares into the void for a few seconds with his feet rooted to the ground. He has had enough. He doesn't want to do this anymore. He's tired of the whole war. Winters' voice manages to shake him up, which finally allows him to take care of Welsh's leg, and since it's then that it becomes most obvious to Winters that Eugene needs some time to compose himself, he sends him to Bastogne for a few hours (I won't go into what happens there and afterwards, because that's not what we're talking about now).

All of this was just to illustrate that people tend to forget that leaders like Winters and medics like Eugene sometimes need to be given the same emotional or physical support like everyone else. And they practise that care perfectly on each other in their own special way. Winters with his encouraging voice and Eugene with his healing touch. I think it's beautiful and incredibly unique.

[steve-brules-rules]

I’ve been talking a lot already but I’m just in an HC mood as I sit here painting more pfps tonight hehe :-)

I want there to be a window of time during Lemuria where Dasein tags along with the wizard offworld. He’s just so curious about everything the spiral has to offer and he’s so excited because he’s finally locked in with this whole physical body thing for longer periods of time. Life is way more thrilling than being Nothing, and Dasein wants to experience it all.

So as they travel together, he spends a lot of time learning simple things like “it’s definitely time to stop and eat because my stomach has a weird pain and I can’t concentrate.” And “oh, when I have no energy and I start getting kind of dizzy and my eyelids are heavy, but there’s no stomach feeling, it’s time for this sleep thing again.”

And Dasein is so fascinated by sleep.

It’s not death. The wizard was quick to correct him about that. And it’s obviously not consciousness. It’s sort of like what he was before he extruded himself into reality, because when you’re asleep, you’re not experiencing the world around you. But you haven’t stopped being, either. You might dream, which is this weird thing the wizard talks about where you see things that aren’t actually there, and those things aren’t real, but they’re also shadows of reality. It’s all really confusing.

Sleeping is kind of scary to Dasein at first. He’s napped here and there when the opportunity came along, but he hasn’t experienced real sleep yet. The kind where you lie down with a comfortable blanket and don’t do anything for about eight hours, give or take. And Dasein’s not sure yet if he wants to try it. He has a ton of questions and not many answers. Will he lose his physical form and have to start all over again forcing himself into reality? Will he lose this particular body? What if he loses contact with the wizard? What if he comes back but even the wizard can’t see him? So he fights it as long as he can.

At some point while he’s trying to stay awake, he’s sitting stiffly on a couch in the wizard’s quarters in the arcanum, and he’s focusing on the black hole out there in space, his head swirling with enough thoughts and questions to distract himself from his exhaustion. The wizard is already tired from a full day of kicking koolakamba lemur ass, and they crumple onto the couch beside him to look out at space too.

There’s another conversation about stuff in life that confuses Dasein. Eventually, the wizard’s responses come slower and groggier until they stop alltogether after Dasein asks about the mechanics of blinking, and he gets concerned. He’d been so focused on staying awake and talking, that he hadn’t noticed until now how the wizard is slumped against him, snoring a little. From underneath The Old One’s tentacles, his mouth starts doing that weird thing again where it curves upward. He’s still not sure what to think of it, but the wizard does it all the time when they see their friends or eat their favorite food, so Dasein isn’t too worried about it.

He wonders if the wizard is doing that dreaming thing right now. He wonders what wizards even dream of. The wizard feels warm against his arm. Really warm. He wonders if everyone is like that, or if it’s another symptom of being a creature who’s practically ascended to divinity at this point. He listens alot to the wizard complain about all the little things other beings don’t experience, like their hair not cooperating after casting too many of those spells that soak everything in tidal seawater, or the voice of Grandmother Raven constantly coming to them when they were just a teenager (note to self: ask the wizard more about that whole “getting older” thing).

Dasein carefully frees his arm when it starts to tingle. The wizard is eased against his side now. It looks uncomfortable, but the wizard doesn’t seem to mind. They now have the same upward curve on their own mouth as they sigh into deeper sleep.

He’s in awe of the wizard. Not because they’ve defeated thousands of enemies, freed entire civilizations, redirected the course of history, or earned enough gold to have at least a dozen castles and some pets that are probably illegal to own. No, Dasein is in awe of the wizard for living. Against every odd in the spiral and beyond, the wizard is alive. Life is so confusing and dangerous and unpredictable, but the wizard persists. And now, because of them, so does he.

Slowly and shakily, Dasein raises the hand of his recently liberated arm and lets it rest on the wizard’s shoulder. For a second, it looks like the wizard might wake up. But they don’t. Their mastery of sleep must be unparalleled, Dasein thinks.

The Old One’s hat starts to slide off, and Dasein barely catches it before it has the chance to fall onto the wizard and disturb them. Apparently, his head is now dipping as he loses the fight against sleep. He can’t help letting his mouth curve up again as he thinks how silly it must look for two gods to be heaped on a couch like this. He’s still a bit afraid, but he takes one more look at the wizard and promises himself that he’ll trust them on this one. And with that thought, Dasein’s eyes slide closed, and he finally understands another piece of life.

[bruhstation]

what playing god does to TWO mfs (explanation of their characters and relationship in act 1 under readmore)

at the start of casa tidmouth (tatmr), d10 is on this relentless quest on capturing lady. the reason of this is because he’s morbidly curious on what would happen if a mere human like him get into contact with gold dust. at that time, lady was putting on a disguise of a normal human working as a newbie in the northwestern railway, and d10 managed to figure out that she’s the lady of the legend thanks to various tales of her and the sodor’s rumours bulletin board. also because he eavesdropped on thomas and percy who wanted to help her look for gold dust resources.

throughout the beginning until mid of act 1, d10 plays this role of a saturday morning cartoon villain. every time he encounters the adventure trio, he always tries to thwart their plans using his 200 iq brain and rube goldberg machines (and incredibly incompetent dieselworks minions), though he always ends up failing.

another thing is that lady wasn’t really threatened by him. whenever d10 recites his essay on how he’ll capture lady, she would just smile and cheerfully respond to his genius plans. lady also perceives emotions and morality much differently compared to humans. she always believes that there’s a way out of every situation because... she’s a god! she has gold dust (albeit only a bit)! she’s not being mean or looking down on d10 or humans as a whole. it’s just the way she is. when humans panic over an injury, she nonchalantly believed it can be healed. when humans experience grief, she believed they’ll get over it soon. this is also because she never experienced companionship prior to arriving to sodor, so she had NO idea how to emotionally connect to others or understand how others feel. she just knows that her duty as the goddess of sodor is to help humans physically, not emotionally.

unfortunately d10 thought she’s looking down on him and always strives to improve his machines and plans to capture her. lady just plays along because she thought it’ll be fun to entertain a mere human like him. there are times where d10 managed to capture her (lady is still unfazed and goes along. she knew he’ll always fail) but as days and weeks progress, d10 slowly started to feel like his actions isn’t rooted in malice but rather because he just... wanted to do it. d10 felt uncomfortable about this relation because he had always thought of himself as this irredeemable, unstoppable force and is never bothered about it. he constantly wavered on his ideals whenever he thought of doing something nice for a change and always forced himself to think of himself as this tough, crazy maniac who’s a big evil genius to ground himself.

the days where d10 and lady didn’t have their one-sided rivalry, lady would just tease d10, tell him to relax his shoulders, and basically annoy him. it eventually evolved into days where they would have small talk about random things, like d10′s rube goldberg machines and lady’s godlike characteristics. lady thought that his machines are genuinely cool and awesome, something that he’s never heard anyone say before. d10 mentioned things about his fascination with gold dust and wanting to know more about its wonders or if it has any side effects... a goddess that learns about science, and an engineer that is interested in how magic works.

even though in their earlier interactions d10 always instigated first, it was always thomas that gave d10 the push he “needed” to kickstart his daily villainy shenanigans by exclaiming out loud something along the lines of “look! diesel 10!’s back!!!!”. so when he’s not present, d10 can’t bring himself to do..... mean bad toughguy things.

d10 initially thought that lady was sent by thomas to spy on his activities, but many convincing words from her proved otherwise. lady finally became honest on how she views humans and said that she found it hard to emotionally connect with others. her role as a god wasn’t to be worshiped, but to be relied on. strangely, d10 related to her. he always believed that there’s nothing science can’t answer. as long as he can use others using his knowledge and sheer willpower, he can achieve whatever he wants and quench any curiosity his brain comes up with. he pushed others away and others pushed him away because of his low sympathy and thought process that is considered “abnormal”. for the first time, lady truly understood the feelings of a human. d10 always takes his leave right before thomas arrives, though. he doesn’t want to make things complicated, but for the first time, he unconsciously felt like caring about someone else besides him.

seems like there’s a lot of things lady and d10 share in common.

and just like that, a friendship between them formed. lady is still her unwavering, cheerful self, but she began to think about her own feelings more rather than let others slide. d10 is still his maniacal, crazy engineer self, but he started to think about wanting to use his genius brain for something sliiightly less destructive. rebuilding the dieselworks, perhaps? one can only imagine. he still thought his machines were awesome, though, and he doesn’t think he can become a 100% good guy. d10 is the first person that made lady experience more “human-like” emotions, while lady is the first person that wasn’t scared of d10 and paid more attention at how intricate his machines are instead of how much they’re safety hazards.

things were starting to look good!

and then the first part of the dotd arc arrived.