#and ofc got ultimate

[crehador]

anyway i finally pulled a few new cards that'll allow me to add some material to the 山田一郎小肚肚 ecosystem

[13eyond13]

actually stunned by how gay The Beatles has been all this time and I just never knew

[ferberus-skull]

pastel cookie....

[tvrningout]

hello, hello, friends! giving a quick heads up that my queue is still running, but i won't be around for the most part since i'll be hanging out with some friends. i think by now, all of the open starters i wrote should have posted, and you can find those here; i also have a connections call that i posted last night specifically for the crime au i mentioned a bit ago! there should also be a meme in the queue, but ofc none of my memes or open starters have an expiration date <3

something else i have to point out is that i've begun editing my muse lists and rules. i've removed most canon muses and shifted a few muses to the tertiary list while i sort them out/revamp them/etc, so please take a look when you have a chance! i've written this on the tertiary page as well, but to be sure i'll say it here, too -- please understand that if you request a tertiary muse, i can't guarantee that replies will be timely or happen at all! i think it'll be different now that i've taken off muses who have been dead quiet, but if a character is on that list, it's bc my muse is extremely low/finnicky, or i'm having trouble grasping their voice. if i don't write them, it's not bc i don't like the dynamic we have but bc i'm struggling to get in their headspace.

i'll likely edit my rules a bit more, but that'll have to wait until after my plans today. all that said and out of the way, please have a wonderful wednesday!! MWAH!!

[viciousewe]

After some misadventures my threadwalker is here!!!!to celebrate I’m by spinning a thicker than default yarn (2ply sport weight instead of my normal 3 ply fingering one ply of which is on the nano) since it’s sooooo much bigger than the nano lol. (White wool is woolery’s Rosie’s cloud top, marled wool is Jacob also from the Woolery)

[juniperhillpatient]

no one understands how hard it can be for me to relax like I think my body & brain would rather die than relax i forced myself to put away my laptop & it wasn’t easy but I did I absolutely forced myself to put it up & I put on a video essay to sit back in bed & relax to but I disagree with everything this guy is saying so I can’t relax I’m going insane

[nonbinoclard]

i've noticed the amount of effort i put into a drawing seems to have an inverse effect on how popular it becomes....

do you think if i draw really quickly and shittily on purpose itll still count or does it have to be authentic?

[unproduciblesmackdown]

truly 2 trans 2 furious is also extremely like [billionsposting as people never meant to be here yet having the symposium while not necessarily having a good time but we can also analyze &/or simply play around with it in other ways with an easy ability to deconstruct things enough for that & perhaps have a good time, perhaps have something way more complicated than that but which could also be called having a good time] like including in its having the "there's a nonbinary f&f character" entry in there at all through kompensoing & monitoring billions since & drawing funny little guys about it (winston, e.g., and taylor) and then also that like, Any & Every Entry in 2 trans 2 furious is of that genre of crucial tour de force visionary symposium understander posts that get 2 notes. and then compiling that is like yes of course this wins an award, a surprise but also not really at all.

[yj-98]

post-surgery comic haul from my hour-long tryst with my favourite not-local comic book store includes two of the 5 issues of a lonely place of dying, me continuing to collect knightfall event issues, 3 robin 1993 issues, the funniest 80s flash cover ever (halbarry but not), robin annual (1992) with eclipsed lonnie, the sam loeb tribute (superman/batman #26) with tim and kon, #1 of shazam: the new beginning, knight terrors: nightwing + batman (to join my robin + shazam...i am HEAVILY debating getting the GL one), and to top it all off my holy grail......finally finding impulse issues (scattered, theres like 10 of them in no particular order)

[dutybcrne]

The first time Kaeya had donned Diluc's old cavalry captain uniform, he had thrown up. Seeing himself in it had felt so wrong, it repulsed him immensely. It was too big, shoulders too broad. Moving in it felt like wearing lead weights, the fabric was all wrong, too stiff, his face didn't match it the way the Pride of the Favonian Knights and Ragnvindr heir's had.

It stank horribly of old blood and rain-soaked grass.

A part of him wonders to this day if the stench he thought he'd smelled on it was in fact all in his head. If it had been lingering guilt over Diluc's disappearance and being allowed to take his place that had affected his perception of it and his appearance in the role. Though considering the harrowing sight he'd witnessed that fateful day, he wouldn't be surprised if the smell would forever remain imprinted within the fabrics, the way that final moment would lay seared into his mind for as long as he’d live.

[cuntstable]

ill be so honest i think asking working class ppl to be more emphathetic towards middle to uppermiddle class people because ”they arent the 1%” ”they can have financial difficulties too :(” is a bit much like yeah yeah sure. but you do understand that from the perspective of people who like have to skip meals to afford rent and who like have to steal nesessities like toilet paper from public bathrooms all of the ”middle class” financial issues seem like fucking nothing? especially when said middle class people cannot and outright refuse to comprehend what growing up in and living in poverty is actually like

[vaugarde]

king dedede @ magolor after arriving on halcandra

[gayofthefae]

I swear I’m a patient person (I’m not) and I trust that it’s all for buildup and is good in the long run and will make things even juicier when the payoff comes but...

I miss season 4 Buddie :(. I think I’m gonna rewatch just season 4 because they were so cute that whole time. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I love me some create distance or at least absence and snap back like a rubber band with extreme emotional intimacy and depth but...I miss my domestic buddie! They were so cute! The dynamic duo!

Yeah. I think I’m gonna rewatch season 4. (contemplating whether to stop after 412 or not though)

[sigmadolos]

To me at least, Nikolai’s actions hurt Sigma a lot more than any of the other actions taken against him. Bare with me now, okay. Listen. I’m going to ramble because I have to look at Fyodor and Nikolai’s relationship to Sigma. The real key to this difference is Nikolai reduces Sigma right back to everything he’s been fighting not to be. Nikolai reduces Sigma back into being just a tool, saved only because Nikolai wants to use Sigma’s ability against Fyodor. He doesn’t ask if Sigma wants to, or if he will. He says that’s what it’s to be done for. (Now obviously relationships built in RP an alter this or not depending on the writer, but for canon discussion sake this is how the manga presents it). There is no discussion or room for debate or even anything Sigma GAINS from this.

It cuts deep. Sure, Sigma knows how Nikolai is. Even the goal. But even so, Fyodor and Nikolai were the ones he spent the most time with when he was rescued and taken in. He grew the strongest attachments to them. They were catalysts for Sigma being able to develop into the person he became as the manager. (And are also additional reasons for his concerning ease around doing terrible things but that’s a different topic.)

 Say what you will, but Fyodor offered a DEAL. Not a demand. He didn’t say Sigma HAD to help them or threaten him. He made a deal. Sigma using his ability for them in turn for the casino. It’s an EXCHANGE and the closest Sigma had ever experienced to being treated like an actual person at that point. Not a tool ordered to do something or threatened with violence, but a simple offer. He even later tells Sigma to run. It’s not belittling, he’s offering genuine advice.

Sigma COULD run away, and Fyodor would accept that. He ADVISED him because they both know Sigma doesn’t have the ability to truly handle a direct offensive confrontation with the Hunting Dogs. Now, we all probably know everyone knows Sigma wouldn’t (and doesnt). But the point remains thusly: Fyodor continues to treat him like a person. If Fyodor didn’t care at all, why bother giving this advice? Think about it and what we know of Sigma. Sigma would have STAYED with or without the advice because the casino is all he has. If he wanted Sigma off the board with 100% certainty, say nothing. But he doesn’t. He offers an escape, and certainly there was a plan if Sigma did the unthinkable and ran. Yes, he is a piece in the chessboard - that does not mean he’s seen as LESS for that. Fyodor and Dazai put THEMSELVES as pieces on a chessboard.

Unfortunately we really don’t have many scenes with Sigma and Nikolai so we don’t know for sure. But they likely had a good relationship, even if Sigma comments that Nikolai is the most annoying one to deal with. And for my canon at least (again, can change with writing partners but in general) they do have an overal good one even if Sigma is like WTF at Nikolai quite often. Nikolai’s seen Sigma at his most timid & worst and at his best.

So someone you trust? Someone you care about? Suddenly turning and treating you like countless other people have? Reducing you from a person back into a tool, something to be used and discarded? Sigma saved because Nikolai has need of his ability? It HURTS. It hurts and cuts far deeper than if someone else was merely using him. He doesn’t have that history or connection and yes, Sigma dislikes being used period (again, USED. Deals are DIFFERENT in Sigma’s perspective). It shakes Sigma deep to the core and rips open the anxieties and thoughts he’s worked so hard to start getting over. The Hunting Dogs situation already left wounds - Nikolai’s actions just cut it deeper.

And so we start to see him regress. He becomes quieter and less vocal - obeying without speaking back DESPITE the fact he threatened the hunting dogs not long ago, despite how easily he took control of the casino, and how he handled the chaos. He starts shutting down and WITHDRAWING because that was the environment he had when he was a tool - be useful, don’t talk, just SURVIVE by being obedient.

Which suddenly makes his pairing with Dazai both infuriating but good. Because we see Sigma find his voice again. He snaps at Dazai to stop messing around, threatens when Dazai messes with his hair. For as AWFUL as it is that Sigma’s been tragged into the game by Dazai choosing him, it also brings Sigma OUT of the environment he would’ve been stuck in. He asks questions, he speaks up, he snaps, and they might seem MINOR but when Sigma was just with Nikolai he basically didn’t speak at all. It’s a self-preservation tactic, but a sad one. It shows how deeply hurt he was by Nikolai that he shuts down and starts falling back - until Dazai catches him and pulls him out of that spot to start recovering ground again and being himself.

[divorcemotif]

"oh hey a real person followed me, I should look at their blog"

soon

"...perhaps I should listen to Eskew."

oh boy you caught my blog after an exciting weekend lmao

I absolutely recommend eskew! I don't have a lot of coherent thoughts, since I got into it over a very physically and mentally draining summer job and have yet to relisten, but it left an impression for sure. I will say what there is of an overarching narrative felt a bit jolty to me in places, for lack of a better term— I think you get the vibe of a show that’s figuring itself out somewhat as it goes, however the ideas are very interesting and I could make a long list of moments that really really affected me. my recent posts probably give a good sense of what I liked most abt it; david ward is just. endlessly interesting as a character imo. the writing’s good— there's a kind of.. ironically humorous edge to a lot of my favourite episodes, something I’d have to relisten to properly articulate. there's a tic of referring to one-off characters by a title instead of a name— the correspondence editor, the architect, the witness— that scratches something in my brain. in contrast with the slimy fleshiness of much of the horror, the sound design is just nice, actually— the rain never stops in eskew and the tone of the narration stays pretty level no matter what’s being described. there are only two narrators and I found both of their voices pleasant enough to close my eyes to on the subway after a long day. very solid show

[naomana]

Joe upset and angry that Vito couldn't be bailed out

Scared shitless because he's in jail because of him, once again