#and oh glory is still only just a DEMO??? WHAT???

[roscoe-me-and-this-fuckin-kid]

baffles me TO THIS DAY why the vices & virtues bonus tracks never made the album. a lotta them are better than what actually made the cut and those 6 songs are some of the best music panic! ever made, especially post-split

[temis-de-leon]

Pick me girls and OM! Brothers - Part 1

Characters: Lucifer, Mammon and Levi (x reader, separately)

Part 2 - Satan, Asmo, Beel and Belphie (x reader, separately)

Part 3 - Diavolo, Barbatos, Solomon and Simeon (x reader, separately)

Masterlist

CW: pick me girl behavior, suggestive, mentions of sex between the brothers and mc, mentions of violence, a bit of magic, mentions of cheating (not actual cheating), mammon and mc taking a shower together, jealous mc, some fluff, some hurt, some comfort, kinda ooc but i had so much fun with this

.

Lucifer

Wherever you went, rumor followed. Haven't you heard? The mighty Lord of Pride has a significant other. Who could it be? Maybe the prince or his butler? Both of them? Or perhaps it was just some random demon? Surely not the human... right?

"Of course not!" said the witch, surrounded by both curious and jealous nobles.

You weren't in the balcony, but you could still hear the conversation in your spot near the open door. You could also hear the gasps and the murmurs. It was ridiculous.

What to do next? You could interrupt the gossip and make your relationship public; after all, it was only a matter of time before someone spotted you both in Ristorante Six or an empty hallway in RAD.

Ignoring them was the better option, however. No words sounded aggressive and yet polite enough to get the witch to shut up without making a scene. Plus, Lucifer was looking exquisitely fine that night. His wings did wonders to his appearance.

"Then who?" the voices asked while you walked away towards your boyfriend.

"Well, I wasn't supposed to say anything..."

Oh no she did not.

"But we're just so in love"

I'll be damned, you thought. She did.

The wrath you felt was primal and it provoked a worried glance from Satan, who was chatting with one of his many contacts in the other side of the ballroom.

You wanted to make an entrance, a dramatic one, but you could only watch as the witch talked and talked about her supposed first date with Lucifer, their first kiss, their first time, his performance in bed (which... No. She was so wrong about that one).

Finally, you opened your mouth.

"You don't say?"

But that wasn't your voice.

Beside you stood Lucifer in all his glory, with a smile that didn't reach his eyes and a hand hugging your waist. The floor trembled under your feet as he walked and, if it wasn't for his tight grip, the magic induced vertigo would've send you to the ground.

You could tell he was trying not to harm you too much, but the group in the balcony wasn't so lucky. All of them were on their knees and some even coughing blood.

"Do tell all your stories tonight, by dawn you'll have no tongue to keep lying"

The witch had tears in her eyes, too focused on her own pain to be aware of her surroundings or his words. Was he being serious? You wanted to ask what would really happen to that woman, but Lucifer was always two steps ahead.

He cradled your face and kissed you, slowly yet firm. His cold skin felt good against yours, already blushing under his half lidded eyes.

"Dance with me?" he asked, caressing your bottom lip with his thumb.

Damn, did he know how to distract you.

Mammon

"You're dating the Great Mammon!" he'd said with his characteristic smile, both of you eating ramen in your bed while watching bad romcoms "That's something to be stoked about! You need to tell everyone about it!"

Of course, that translated to: please, please, please, I need people to know that I bagged YOU and YOU chose ME.

So, there you were, chatting with his makeup stylist and some other models while he posed in front of the camera. It was better than you expected, actually. You thought the fashion world in the Devildom would be full of self righteous assholes and insufferable divas, but you couldn't be more wrong.

Well, of course, there's always an exception.

There was a demoness in the other side of the studio, taking selfies with a pout in her lips and a fake, nauseating, innocence in her expression. She looked toxic from a mile away.

And yet, your boyfriend dated her for three months; three long and excruciating months, yes, but still. They'd dated.

And you were cool with that. So so cool with that. You were chill. A freezer, even. You loved Mammon and everyone and their mother could tell Mammon loved you. Everything was fine.

Except... well...

It was easy to forget the brothers were famous and popular bachelors, princes of hell, that, just like in every human monarchy, had fans to spare. People that would support them no matter what they did and no matter who they dated and people that would hate everyone they dated because... You don't really know why.

You just had some haters.

And this bitch was taking advantage of this, you knew it in your heart.

Rumors of Mammon cheating on you with one of his model coworkers had been there since the beginning of your relationship. It was something you just had to live with, one of the reasons the Avatar of Greed doted on you with everything he had.

Mammon loved you.

So why did you panick so much when he stood up in the underwear he was advertising, getting ready for the next picture, and the demoness took a selfie of her lips with his half naked body behind her?

"That whore" whispered another model behind you. You liked them.

But it was okay, you didn't mind. No, really. You didn't.

Except you did.

And so did Mammon.

"Oi!"

Everyone looked at him and you could swear his demon form was starting to show, blending with his siluette in blurred edges.

"Delete that"

She could've laughed at him, like everyone tended to do. She could've ignored him and tempt fate, but it was not a wise idea.

There was static in the air, black mist barely clouding your vision and a faint voice whispering in the back of your brain. The sound of feathers filled the room and soon crows started to surround the studio outside the window.

After a couple of sickening minutes, a loud pop settled the place back to normal and caused the birds to fly away.

The demoness gasped, letting her DDD fall to the ground like it burned her. Looking at her smoking hands, it probably did.

After that, everyone acted like nothing happened. You, however? Your whole body was buzzing, leaving you paralyzed with feelings you needed to explore in the future and making Mammon look at you with a knowing smile.

"...sick of those rumors..." he'd say hours later while he washed your hair in the shower "and you dumbass humans believe everything you see, even if it's stupid"

He'd wait until you were both in bed, ruminating about every little thing that happened back there before talking again.

"Because it's stupid, you know? I'd never cheat on ya. The Great Mammon would never do that to you. I mean, I'd never to that anyway, but specially not to you. Keep that in mind, human! You catched the best demon of all hell! Lucky you!"

Lucky me, he wanted to say instead.

You understood him anyways.

Leviathan

@/f3istyk1ttenuwu sent you a message!

.

.

You stared at the screen and the screen stared back at you.

Reading the user name physically hurt you and you'd lie if you said you weren't worried about it. Did you trust Levi? Yes, absolutely. Did you trust f3istyk1ttenuwu? Not really, no.

So (this time voluntarily), you opened the gates of hell.

It was the Devildom version of Discord, which was worrying enough, and the user's pfp showed a cute pinked hair girl with dainty horns and half of her boobs out.

With a frown and your heartbeat in your throat, you opened the chatroom.

@/f3istyk1ttenuwu: r u lone?

@/f3istyk1ttenuwu: did ur frend leef?

@/f3istyk1ttenuwu: their a party pooper

@/f3istyk1ttenuwu: didnt let u join the grp

@/f3istyk1ttenuwu: :(

@/f3istyk1ttenuwu: leviachsn?

.

Oh, heeeeell no.

First of all, it was leviachAn. Second, YOU were the only one who could call him THAT.

Ignoring the voice of reason, you checked the door before investigating the previous messages. Levi was in your room, retrieving your nightwear as punishment for not letting you win in Devil Kart YET AGAIN, so, knowing how flustered he got everytime he saw you in the Ruri Chan's inspired piyamas he got you for your birthday, you were sure you had another couple of minutes alone in his room.

@/f3istyk1ttenuwu: thx 4 sving me !!

@/f3istyk1ttenuwu: we shld team more

@/f3istyk1ttenuwu: were zo good 2gether

wEre Zo gOoD 2gETheR

You couldn't help but mock her in the privacy of your mind. Did she think writing like a 10 year old was attractive? If so, what the fuck?

@/f3istyk1ttenuwu: call? brke my pc & cn't fix it alone \(-o-)/

"Call a fucking tech" you whispered to yourself.

"Henry?"

Fuck.

You turned around like a deer in headlights. Levi's cheeks still wore a furious red, but he remained quiet at the door when he saw you snooping through his private conversations.

Fuck it, you thought after some uncomfortable seconds. If someone could understand jealousy, it would be him.

"Who's this girl?"

Levi frowned and got closer to you, leaning over your shoulder to see his computer, probably giving you the closeness he'd crave if he was in your place.

"Oh, I don't know" his final answer disappointed you "Some girl the others wanted in the party"

But why was she talking to him like that?

"And why is she talking to you like that?"

He shrugged his shoulders, knowing that both of you knew the answer. Then, he straightened like he had an epiphany, and looked at you with shining eyes and a smile too big for his face.

"Are you jealous, MC?"

Levi jumped in happiness before you could say anything, unable to truly express how happy he was upon his sin affecting you.

"My Henry is jealous!! Because of a yucky disgusting otaku like me!! This reminds me of that anime: 'Help?! My crush snooped through my pc and now they're jealous because someone else is flirting with me??'"

It was obvious by now you had nothing to worry about, so you let him be. You let him appreciate how much you loved him.

In the end, you had to shower his face in kisses to shut him up and, for great measure, you also changed into that extra large Ruri Chan t-shirt in front of him.

Hours later, both of you were sweating in the comfort of his bathtub and Levi was completely sure you fell asleep.

And if you saw how he offered himself to fix this girl's computer only to hack her camera and post her real face all around the internet, no you didn't.

Tagging them lovely people: @hello-gloomy @the-sassiest-toaster @hero-nii-blog @yourlocalyin

Hope you like it!

[jiecomic]

Chapter 4- The boy means trouble

Previous|Table of contents|Next

" Citizens!- It is I... RED SON! I have taken control of the weather station that will harness the very power of nature to return my father to his former glory; this message is more of a courtesy"

"HAHAHAHA!"

" When I finish, my father will once more dominate the wor-"

Jie turned her TV off.

"Yep, I heard enough, gods... this boy should find himself some hobby or something..." She muttered

Gou looked at her from the floor with his soul-piercing eyes.

"Nah Gou, they need to fix this on their own" she took a piece of popcorn and threw it into her mouth "Besides... I don't think that master would like me to stick close to the Monkey Boy"

Gou barked and run to the door.

"Oh, I get it. You want to go outside" Jie got up from her couch and came to the door to open them

"WHAT THE-?!"

As soon as Jie opened the door she felt a strong blow of wind.

The weather was indeed crazy- The wind was so strong that it almost made Jie fly to the wall!

She had to use a lot of strength to close the entrance to her house, after that she felt exhausted and laid down on the floor. She looked at her pet again, he was definitely waiting for her to react.

But now it really made Jie change her mind.

Ugh!

She stood up and teleported herself to the weather station.

MK was doing really bad, mostly because he couldn't control his staff. At the end he kicked himself out of the station, and when he was ready to fall on the ground he suddenly felt someone... catching him?

" Got ya" he heard a woman's voice behind his back

Jie caught him as if he was a thrown doll. She held his arms tightly, then put him on the ground. When he was standing before her, still his back facing her face, she wiped the dust off of her dress.

"JIE?!" MK shouted into her ears" W-what are you doing?!"

" What are YOU doing? Letting yourself be kicked by some kid with an anger issue?!" Jie asked with her arms crossed, not hiding her frustration over the boy's behaviour

"I-I..." MK's face suddenly dropped

As Jie was waiting in silence for his answer she suddenly heard a familiar voice;

" How you doing down there?"

"Monkey King!" MK gasped in surprise

"Greetings, Master" Jie bowed down

Monkey King's eyes moved to Jie, he didn't notice her before and looked surprised

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!"

And just a little angry...

Jie on the other hand was completely unmoved

"I was just walking around, what a coincidence that Monkey Boy was just thrown down at me..." she said with a dull voice trying to escape her master piercing gaze

Then MK started talking;

"Great, now that you're all here we can fly up there and smash that-

"No, no, no, no" Wukong interrupted "In case you forgot I'm retired. You're supposed to be the one taking care of the bad guys"

"Th-Then what about ms Jie?" MK asked the demoness with tears in his eyes, hoping for help

"Don't look at me" She answered firmly

The shocked reaction of MK was saying everything.

"But don't worry- after all you are INVINCIBLE- right?"

" Well yeah I-I mean I am invincible but you know..." MK made a loud exhale and turned to Jie "You were right, I can't control my powers... I feel like I'm only messing everything up!"

Jie didn't know what to say so she discretely give an eye signal to the Monkey King. He seemed to understand since he finally jumped off of his cloud.

" Listen kid, the problem is really simple" He announced calmly

" What is it?!" MK was ready for the answer

"It's you"

"Huh?"

"Ahem... what he means is your lack of self-confidence" Jie explained quickly so that MK wouldn't get the bad idea

" But I am self-confident!" MK almost shouted into Wukong's ears

" No, you're just loud" Wukong pushed him away with his tail " The only way to self confidence is-

" Take it till I make it?"

"NO! Practice!- you think I took shortcuts?!"

"Well..." Jie who knew his history was just about to verify the truth of this sentence

" NO!" Wukong interrupted her " It took me centuries of training and fighting and just beating up demons- just so many demons...anyway! Nothing worth anything comes for free"

Somehow for Jie it sounded a little bit of suspicious.

"But what about my friends, the city!" MK seemed very nervous

At that moment his attitude caught Jie's attention

'So he does care about others huh?'

After MK's battle with DBK, seeing all the ruins of the city Jie though that the boy didn't even care about other's safety but it turned out that she was wrong... and that actually made her feel a little bit guilty.

"How about limiting your power" a thought escaped from Jie's lips

" Is it possible?" MK jumped to Monkey King and used his puppy eyes on him

Gah..

" Alright, there is a way that I can limit your power, but..."

"But, what?"

"You won't be invincible anymore"

With that Jie saw a moment of hesitation in boy's eyes, but it was just a moment that disappeared before it could change his decision

" Alright, let's do this!"

As expected, with the help of Wukong MK was able to win against Red Son and change everything back to normal.

" Is something wrong?" Jie asked Monkey King who was staring at her for a long time

'Maybe he is angry because I interfered'

" Nothing, just that..." Wukong scratched his head nervously " I guess you were right... about you know-the kid and his control over my power. Maybe I rushed too fast..?"

Jie was totally not expecting her master to say such a thing, this could be classified as an apology, from the Great Sage!

'Perhaps that monk really taught him some good manners'

"I was the one wrong, this boy... He actually has a really kind and warm soul" She spoke slowly while looking at the mentioned MK, who was happily playing and chuckling with his friend, Jie noticed that when MK is with people he cherishes, his soul is shining more.

" Hoho..." a strange laugh escaped from the monkey's mouth " So you finally accepted him, hmm?"

" Let's say that I can force myself to tolerate him for the time being"

"How cold..."

She chuckled a little but soon her face turned more serious.

" It won't be only DBK who he will have to fight, right..? She spoke quietly

" No. When the rumours about my descendant will spread further there will be more, much stronger opponents he will need to fight with" Monkey King explained with a serious tone of his voice "But till then, we will make him ready"

'...'

'...we, huh?'

' As I tough, because of this boy I'm gonna have more things to do...,

Sigh

'What a troublesome kid...'

End of chapter 4

Previous|Table of contents|Next

[yukidragon]

Sunny Day Jack - Ian's Theme Song for Sunshine in Hell

I think I found the perfect theme song for Ian in Sunshine in Hell. It might fit him for other peoples' HCs and the game as well.

The title is a little misleading for the theme of the song, and at first, when I only noticed it for its title, I was thinking it might be good to add to the playlist I'm working on for Alice. (You can check it out here, but know that it's still a work in progress.) "Let me let you go" is a phrase that fits Alice so damn well. She is trying so damn hard to let Ian go, but he won't let her.

Which is why this song fits Ian scarily well once you hear the lyrics.

(Go, oh, go) Why'd you let me let you go? Bullets in the dark Shootin' through my hesitating heart We were never gonna go far 'Cause I'm no good at loving someone as good as you Look what I put you through I know I can't undo this I'm black and blue to tell the truth It's breakin' me, I'm not just losin' you I'm losin' what you saw in me Why'd you let me let you go? I can't breathe without you here I wish you'd never watch me leave Why'd you let me let you Go, oh, go Why'd you let me let you go? 強がって 一言も言えなくて [I was too strong. I couldn't say a word.] 何も伝えれなくて [I didn't know what to say.] 君はもういない けど今なら言える [I know you're gone, but I can tell you now.] 気付くのが遅すぎる こんな僕を許して [I know it's too late. I'm sorry I'm like this.] I'm black and blue to tell the truth It's breakin' me, I'm not just losin' you I'm losin' what you saw in me Why'd you let mе let you go? I can't breathe without you here I wish you'd never watch me leave Why'd you let me let you Go, oh, go Why'd you let me let you go? I tried, I tried to love you I swear I tried But how can I love you if you're not here? I tried, I tried to love you I swear I tried I tried, I tried to love It's breakin' me 君を失った 僕はどうしたらいい? [What am I supposed to do now that I've lost you?] Why'd you let me let you go? I can't breathe 他は何もいらない 君だけでいい [I don't need anything else. I just need you.] Why'd you let me let you Go, oh, go Why'd you let me let you go? Go, oh, go (Oh, why did you let me let you go?) (Oh) Why'd you let me let you go? (Go)

The lyrics are self-depreciating and full of longing, but also placing the blame on the person being longed for. "Why'd you let me let you go?" This is a feeling that I can see Ian having towards Alice in regards to letting him leave for his fancy school when he needs her. He would never have cheated if he wasn't gone and missing her. Sure, would've been giving up on his dream and settling for a domestic life with her instead, but at least they would be still together. Right?

Credit to the awesome Sauce for this gorgeous cropped picture, which you can see un-cropped in all of its NSFW glory over here. Credit to them for the other pictures I might use as well for this ramble. Why not consider checking out the rest of their beautiful work or support them and the rest of the SnaccPop Studios team over on their patreon? There's a whole bunch more spicy pictures to see if you sign up!

As you can see from instances like this, and from what we've seen in the demo, Ian's self-esteem is rock bottom. He can't handle being alone. He depends on his partner, his childhood friend, and without them, even just in a different room, things feel too big and empty for him to handle.

Ian was so pessimistic about everything, even their relationship. He didn't even think Alice(/MC) would want someone like him in the first place. It was clear since the beginning when he finally got the nerve to ask her out after crushing on her for years.

As I've gone over extensively in many previous rambles about Ian, such as the one about why he might have cheated, he had an abusive home life. He was bullied by his peers. He knows full well that he's flawed and wounded. "I'm black and blue to tell the truth" fits him so well.

What makes the breakup even worse is that, in a way, Ian wound up giving Alice reasons to not want to be with him. She constantly had to reassure him that he was worthy of love, of being loved by her, despite him feeling so sure that he wasn't worthy, that he couldn't be a good enough partner. It never sunk in. He couldn't stop seeing himself as weak and unworthy. Nothing she said could convince him, but he admired her even more for always trying. He wound up proving his fears to be true when he cheated and finally destroyed her faith in him.

For as low as Ian saw himself, he was happy that Alice always saw so highly of him. Now... she's seen him at his worst. He tried, he really did, even though he knew he was "no good at loving someone as good as" her. He admired how she could see the beauty in him that he couldn't see for himself. He wanted to be the person she saw... and he destroyed that image of himself in her eyes. "It's breakin' me, I'm not just losin' you, I'm losin' what you saw in me."

Why did Alice have to encourage him to leave her behind? Ian can't help but lament it during those lonely nights at his fancy school full of strangers. How could she stand watching him leave her behind when his new dorm was so big and empty, his bed so cold and lonely without her to hold him at night. If only she asked him to stay, he would have, no question.

But she let him go. Alice was always so strong. How could she be so strong without him when he felt so weak and lonely without her? In his weakness, he clung to someone he shouldn't, and he lost her for good. He tried to be strong on his own, but he wasn't. He showed her just how weak he truly was, and he lost her.

Alice might be strong enough to let him go, but Ian isn't. He can't let her go. Nights are colder and emptier than ever now. How could she leave? She forgave him - she said she did, but she left. She insisted they both needed space to heal, to live life independently so that they could grow stronger, for a chance to reconcile, but her goodbye felt so final. Now she's not answering any of his calls, texts, messages, or anything. This can't be the end.

"But how can I love you if you're not here?" Being so alone is why Ian strayed. He needs her love, her strength, her support. Without it, he's even weaker. He became a person he can't even recognize, someone he hates, someone who would do something as disgusting as cheat.

How can Ian prove to Alice how much he loves her and how sorry he is if she's not here with him? He knows what he did, what he put her through. He knows he can't undo any of the awful mistakes he made, but how is he supposed to make things better without her?

How could Alice let Ian leave? How can she let him go so easily? How can she be so strong when he feels so weak? It's like he can't even breathe without her. He needs her so badly. He can't let her go. He can't be the best version of himself without her. That version of him, the man he always wished to be, only existed in her eyes, in the love she had for him and the way she helped him grow into a better person.

Ian won't let Alice go, and he won't let her let him go either. He's not strong enough. He tried so, so hard to love her right, and he won't he give up no matter how many times he fails, no matter how many apologies he has to give her. He'll keep trying. He'll try to be stronger, better, to make sure she can never leave him again, make sure she will never want to let him go again.

But Ian can only feel strong when Alice is with him, when she loves and supports him.

Ian is breaking without her, without the first person to show him love and shine a light in his empty, cold, and broken life. He needs her. He's weak, wounded, and worthless. He never learned how to live without her. He doesn't want to. He tried and he hated who he became.

Ian can't let Alice go, even if it winds up breaking them both.

On a totally unrelated note, Jack and Ian have a lot in common, don't you think? It's kind of like looking into a funhouse mirror, isn't it?

@channydraws @earthgirlaesthetic @sai-of-the-7-stars @cheriihoney @illary-kore @okamiliqueur

[silversiren1101]

👑 after the punch in Iz (if I recall correctly?)

🦋 first impressions?

🎨 after learning his brother joined the Hellknights?

👑 Galfrey after Mino punches her cheek upon first meeting again in Iz:

Minovae: "My hands are still shaking, there's still a splash of blood on my gauntlet... I just... I just punched a queen- THE queen. My hands are shaking, and I can't stop vibrating, but I'm not afraid. I'm not. What is this? Righteousness? Adrenaline pumping like I've just planted my foot over a balor's corpse and shouted in victory to the high heavens. From assaulting the queen? No. Was this usurpation? Was this rebellion? It doesn't matter. We have a job to do and she won't get it done. If she won't end this war then I will. I'll do what it takes because I finally have what it takes. I'm a Hellknight. I need no orders from sovereigns no longer fit for command. What is right must prevail. What is justice must come to pass. No queen decides what that means."

Galfrey: "Is this how it must be, then? It is only... right, I suppose. I made a mistake. I am under no illusion that I did not, banishing her to the Abyss to jealously guard the glory she had stolen from me. If this is how I must repay my folly, then I suppose I should be grateful she is not as rigid and dark as her armor and former allegiance suggests. Other leaders have been less negligent and reckless than I to earn a wartime execution at the hands of a knight of hell. Godspeed, Commander Arangeir, though I know you do not reach for them in your times of need... Godspeed... Deliver us from this nightmare once and for all where I could not."

🦋Arueshalae first impressions!

Minovae: "A demoness- and a succubus at that. Locked up behind her own side's bars? She must truly be a monster if even the other demons are so wary of her, and I can see why. Claiming to be a messenger from a good goddess is a tried and true tactic for these fiends, just look at that succubus in the Gray Garrison who convinced that Crusader she was Iomedae and he plucked his own eyes out for her. I shudder to think what she's done to put herself behind there, and I don't have time to figure it out nor do I particularly care. The Crusaders can deal with her after Drezen is retaken. I have a feeling we'll be needing these cells."

Arueshalae: "She thinks me a monster like the others, and it pains me to hear because I know she is right. Oh, Desna, if someone so bright like her thinks me a lost cause, then will I ever become what you see in me? Will I ever truly be good? There is so much goodness in her heart as much as I could feel it bleeding. Even as she condemned me and looked at me with scorn for what I am, I only proved her right because she is bursting with so much love I could taste it through the bars. I wanted it. Desna... I wanted it. I'm so sorry..."

🎨Sosiel upon learning his brother became a Hellknight

Minovae: "...Sosiel thinks me... He thinks me no true Hellknight, or that I do not know what they are 'truly' like, as he says. He treats me as a naïve child idolizing a concept of knighthood they know nothing about. I did not bleed through a decade of war in my black armor, and hold countless brothers and sisters in my arms as they died to be-*she inhales sharply and sighs* He's hurting. I get that. If he thinks it impossible for light and kindness to exist in this black plate, if he thinks me cruel, then it's really no matter to me. What I worry is that... this war has not yet broken him but this... I think this might. Wherever his brother is, whatever happened to him, I don't think there are any easy answers for him. You would think a painter would be able to see the world in more color than just black and white... but there's still time."

Sosiel: "I can no longer look her in the face. I haven't been able to for days. When the news hit... I still can't believe it. I refuse to believe it. My brother was kind, a perfect paladin in every way. Strong. Patient. Kind. I said some... ugly things, Shelyn forgive me. I said he could never have joined the Hellknights because he wasn't a cruel, blackhearted monster, and Minovae asked me if I thought the same of her. She looked at me so... flatly, no anger or sadness, and asked me if I thought her unkind or cruel. I still haven't answered her. I don't know if I can in a way that doesn't cause even more pain: hers or mine. A part of me thinks she's lost, clinging to the familiar, but I've seen a mercilessness in her that has terrified me. When she executed Narty without trial or emotion on her face... Thinking of what that means for my brother... what he would look like-No. I refuse. Trever... Trever would never."

[flowergirlmiwa]

games I wish I had when I was a kid!

Yu-Gi-Oh The Eternal Duelist Soul

This was one of the best selling games on the GBA, but I got Dark Duel Stories on GBC instead. Eventually I got 7 Trials to Glory, a mixed bag of a game I nonetheless hold dear to my heart, but I wish I had EDS as a kid. EDS is the perfect game to be the first YGO game on GBA. The spelltraps are massive blowouts, caveman Yu-Gi-Oh is in full effect, and the cardpool is both small and nostalgic. EDS (or the original Japanese release) was the first video game that actually tried to follow the rules of the real world OCG/TCG card game and it did a pretty good job along with a clean presentation, great music and flavorful decks to grind against. Plus the packs you pull from are mostly based on real Japanese card sets! Basically I admire a lot about what this game did in 2002 and in a potential world where I got it alongside my GBA SP in 2003 I would have been set for years. Instead I got... Dark Duel Stories in late 2003 around the time I got my GBA SP, and that game is .. not as worth investing time into. Oh yeah and it has a cute calendar system with weekly matches at the duel shop and oooo it's just such a cute game!

Goldeneye 007

I didn't have a lot of N64 games as a kid, but out of all my regrets on the console, I easily missed out the most not owning Goldeneye. Now I can appreciate it as basically the Super Mario 64 of first person shooters and imagine that, even though I only owned one controller, those levels would have kept me coming back again and again obsessively for hours. I can just imagine how I would have organically find the island on Dam by myself and wondered what was out there. I never had that chance

Super Smash Bros Melee

Throughout the early 00s I had various nostalgic experiences playing the original Super Smash Bros, and eventually I craved very dearly to play it's sequel. Literally all I could tell you is that it had (Scott the Woz voice) "a freaky STORY MODE! now that's cool!" and you could play as Bowser. It looked so damn cool but I didn't have a GameCube. I would have dreams about playing this game I knew very little about. I actually can guarantee I read about the Sonic and tails in melee rumor before I had seen more than an hours worth of gameplay in my life (all through playing demos in 2002).

When did I actually get a GameCube? 2007. I actually remember visiting Nintendo World NY in 2006 right before release of the Wii and playing Melee on one of their demo kiosks (and wind waker for the first time ever, notably). I got my hands on a GameCube in summer 2007 thanks to a friend of my dad's and pretty much the first thing I did was go to the still surviving Hollywood Video in The City and rent melee. Now considering I was 12 the first time I got to extensively play melee and really enjoy it, you could say I was still a child and that's true. I wish I somehow had a GameCube around 2004 and got to play it then though. Look, things felt different in my life then, it wasn't the same kind of feeling to me. By the time I got to play it I didn't really have that childish exuberance and excitement. Plus I got a Wii that same year for Christmas so my overall excitement for the GameCube was muted lol.

The Simpsons: Hit and Run

I would have gobbled this up as a kid even if not the biggest fan of the simps, if I had gotten this at release for PS2 I could imagine I would have spent many hours playing it

Pokemon Stadium 2

As a kid I desperately wished I had this game and rented it a bunch of times. When I discovered you could emulate N64 I spent most of my time doing so playing this game. I eventually got my own real copy around 2019 but considering I would leave the first game on for days on end I would have loved to have had stadium 2 as a kid. Plus it actually has single player content and provides plenty to people without use of a transfer pak too! I was fascinated by the updates as a kid renting the game

[awiola]

[A joke of a] normal update, spring XXIV

Tl;dr - no progress, regress only and not even the system kind.

A bit early this time but these two weeks or so won't really make much of a difference so yeah.

Checking stuff I wrote about before... I failed the 100 days of art challenge. But I did draw the Father daki, even if at the last moment. Still no comms open but it's barely july so. Maye. We'll see.

Current game stuff

Eeeh... Idk where to start so... Impostor Syndrome hasn't really seen much progress. I wasn't joking in that tl;dr. Reason being about the same as usual + the fact I was actually busy and properly afk irl. Shocking.

I mean, pretty sure I did basically no dev for around three months already if you don't count that one day I did some programming on Enmity but it's going extremely slowly cause it's basically all committing to a very bad decision. If someone ever tells you that having a window of space that's not even rectangular in your textbox is a good idea, don't believe them and kick them away while you're at it. I knew it was a mistake from the very beginning and I'm sticking to it. At least adding transitions, drawing all the missing art etc later would be pretty fast compared. I do have lotsa materials to compile and documents to make irl but I think I'll be done by the end of july or so so the game would most likely be finished before Spooktober. I think. Maybe.

Soon after the winter update, I was told two of the games I was working on were suspended indefinitely/cancelled and thanks to the whole team for your hard work. I talked about one of them here [with Doibats] and the other one I'm pretty sure I never mentioned. I wanted to join another team, then, but life was like 'NO >:C' so I had to leave soon after orz Good thing I wasn't anyone important.

I think for now I'll just focus on finishing my other games or correcting stuff from the "24 >:C" list since a lot of that is minor enough I could do it in a day or two and just couldn't've bothered before. If I work on anything, you'd probably just see it suddenly appear on my ich profile with more info during the next update.

.

.

.

Oh, right. If anyone was curious about that otome I did basically no work on and wasn't even a part of the team but hey, promo is promo, right, it's Chromatic Agape. They made some cool design decisions so wait a bit till the end of otojam [based on what I saw about their progress, it seems highly likely they'll finish on time] and bask in its full glory. By playing. Or check out the demo now.

Pariiish noootiiiceees

So, Insect [adjacent] jam is still happening this year, just later. I don't know when, I'll make a separate post. Tentacle jam, though? Probably not. I mean, arthropods can have tentacles [I think??? Idk], too, so you can add them anyway but yeah. I want to be able to join my own jam. And there's also the fact I totally failed with making mushroom game and it's just waiting there and staring at me menacingly cause it's hidden from the public eye... So wait for the jam annoucement post. This year.

---

All that html hates me, I tell you.

Over.

[limey-writes]

How would the yandere red mercs deal with their s/o being extremely close to red Spy and Spy being extremely protective over them, maybe hes yandere for their s/o himself? (Ps for red Spy it's the same situation, except his s/o is extremely close to blue spy)

Ooooh, i really like this one, i only do 4 at a time but feel free to submit again for another few! I'll give a bit of love to some mercs i dont use much lol

Tw: yandere, maybe implied de*th/m*rder, etc

Engie

-- Engie didn't think of himself as a jealous man, though no one thinks of that but right now, seeing you so close to that gosh darn snake? He's holding himself back from wringing his neck in front of you. He knows it's not your fault, you can't help being your fantastic self, and people just are selfish trying to steal the light you bless them with. At first, he tried to maybe talk some sense into Spy, the smart move that he thought would work in his favor, he knew how to use his words, and he knew when it was time to possibly put his trusty gunslinger to use. What he wasn't expecting, was a fight back from a Spy who threatened to steal you away from him with sweet words and soon, a dead body. He's furious, of course, walking away with a few shameful new cuts, though still proud of his own fight back, he knew he'd have to instead talk to you. He does everything he can, using sweet words and even trying to guilt you into staying away from Spy. If that works, great! He's happy and dandy with you again! If not, well, he's not above using..drastic measures.

Spy

-- The master of manipulation himself, he knows how to woo you, the ins and outs of things you like and dislike, he's perfected himself to be able to be your perfect match. He was the type to follow you everywhere, even without you knowing, and having once followed you straight to a hang out with his counterpart. Of course he was furious. Were you planning to replace him? Did he trick you onto being with him instead? Did you even know what you were doing?! He couldn't help but be angry, he couldn't help but want to show you exactly where you had fucked up by lying to him. But of course, he was patient, watching how the other Spy looked at you, how he took in your beauty and glorious self, he hated it. He was meant to be the one to take in your glory, not this pathetic waste! So of course, he took things into his own hands, and soon enough, you were waking up in a room in a place you didnt recognize, with your 'friend' sitting in front of you, and your very heartbroken Spy standing behind him with his knife at ready. "Oh mon chere, how you wound me with how selfless you are with your wonderous self.." You were in for a hell of a show.

Demo

-- At first he thought it was fine, he thought he could handle seeing you spending time with the Spy that had been flirting from day one. Unfortunately, it always looked like you were so oblivious to his advances, which he deeply worried about. The lingering hand around your waist, leaning in so close to you, hell, even pressing a kiss to the back of your hand. It was driving him completely mad, he hated seeing how Spy tried to worm his way into your heart where he rightfully belonged. So, being the good man he is, he first confronted you, telling you how bad that Spy was, it's dangerous spending time with someone like Spy! Why not spend more time with your much better Demo? He's always there for you, always making you smile, you couldn't ever think of a time where he hadn't supported you, and even with Spy whispering such honey words into your ear, Demo wouldn't ever lie to you about things like that...right?

Soldier

-- Soldier knew exactly what was going on the second Spy had approached you, and of course, knowing him, he was not quiet about it. Constantly finding ways to get Spy away from you, he even tried rocket jumping away from the French man. He's shouting orders over Spy's silky words to you, shoving him out of the way when he gets too close. Soldier was not one to mess with, and he knew it, he'd constantly do anything to have your attention, becoming practically your personal guard dog. Anywhere you go, he's 5 feet behind, and yes, he will growl if need be, as long as anyone stays the hell away from you. "WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING MAGGOT?! TALKING TO THAT FRENCHIE AGAIN?? HE'S COMPLETELY UN-AMERICAN, BUT I'M PURE BLOOD AMERICAN CUPCAKE!" Yes that is an argument he uses and expects you to follow. Whether somehow you try to get out of his grasp to actually spend time with Spy who was smugly shooting looks at the pining soldier, you can sure bet someone's neck is going to be snapped more than a few times.

[bastart13]

I’ve had a lot of fun recently coming with with female mercenary characters for TF2. I really liked where the concept art was going with making them all individual characters rather than simply “if the characters were women”

The design style is fantastic for distinct simplicity so I tried limiting myself to basic colours and shapes to make these

and I’m pretty confident they pass the silhouette test!

Character names/bios under the cut!

Heavy

Name: Marie Jarrett

Age: Mid 30s-40s

Height: 6’5

Nationality: American (Hawai’i)

Bio: Raised in Hawai’i, growing up she developed more and more drastic measures to fend off the tourists swarming her home. Land mines, electric gates, guard dogs, none could stop them for long until she picked up her trusty minigun to send her message. But even still, she hears the click of cameras in the night.

Eventually, she left her home to explore the world. Enthralled with the image of seeing different wonders across different countries, she’s always disappointed. She’s travelled every continent and still finds nothing that lives up to her expectations. No place, no person. She’s outgoing and open to new experiences, only she usually hates them.

Mercenary life is a great opportunity to earn money, see sights, meet new people and kill them after they don’t meet your expectations. She hates New Mexico and takes every opportunity to destroy the buildings and insult her employer’s tastes. She finds some people she tolerates within the mercenaries as she hasn’t yet visited where they live. However much she hides it, she has a deep, instinctual fear of the Engineer.

  Soldier

Name: Linda Smith

Age: Early 40s

Height: 5’10

Nationality: Canadian

Bio: Canada’s perfect woman… or so she claims. The star of war propaganda posters and clearly decided for the role because of her great tactical assets. She’s there to motivate people into the fight. To spread the glory of Canada and inspire her allies. She believes she has higher orders than anyone else she’s working for (ignoring the fact she hasn’t heard from them for a good few years) and is determined to follow them to the letter. She may have lost the letter but she remembers it good enough.

She represents the ideals of Canada: polite, friendly, apologetic, and pacifistic. None of these are contradicted by how she throws around rockets. That’s not what Canada means. She’s superior to everyone around her and graciously educates them on how to improve through example. She loves her French and British allies and will kindly tell the Americans how to be better.

She’s motivating and actually fairly competent, it’s just that competency might be misdirected. She’s damn good at rocket jumping, shooting her shotgun, and supporting her team, it’s just that you really need to get it in her head when she’s meant to be doing it.

Scout

Name: Patricia “Pat” Herald

Age: 50s-60s

Height: 5’4

Nationality: English

Bio: In her years, Patricia has learnt fear… and she’s learnt to laugh in its face. She wakes up at the crack of dawn, ready to leave at the drop of a hat, boots polished and laced the night before. Her years have taught her that with a gun and Jeremy by her side, she can survive!

The postal route of Appleby-in-Westmorland.

She’s been chased by geese, dogs, cows, elderly ladies, and when her postal route had her delivering post during the war, she developed a taste for blood. Nothing will stop her from delivering her post on time. Every day before 6am, every postbox will have their letters and parcels. One chucked across barbed wire, another house jumped over a river, another house miles into the country with dogs on her heels, she WILL get there and she’ll get there FAST.

But after a couple of decades, she needs a change of scenery, and the Gravels wars are just the holiday she’s needed. With her trusty black and white cat by her side (ignoring the yowling and scratches) she reckons it’ll be great time to enjoy herself.

Quotes: “Oh, hello, Human Jeremy.”

“Bloody fucking Ethel! Building her house out in the country… surrounded by bloody hills and rivers!”

Pyro

Name: Nikephoros Papadopoulos

Age: Late 20s

Height: 5’11

Nationality: Greek

Bio: Survival of the fittest. Nature gives and nature taketh away. If you’re not prepared for that, well, Pyro is more than happy to teach you the lesson. They embody the old values of the Greek gods: f*ck or fire. She indulges her every whim and unfortunately for the people around her it often involves arson.

One year for the Olympic games, she was given the noble title of torchbearer. On complete coincidence, the Olympics shifted to primarily water sports. Underwater sprints became the hot new trend!

She’s merry and chatty, never missing the opportunity to talk to other people about herself and her world view. She can’t wait to spread her gospel to help other people improve themselves (though she always gets a laugh out of those who go out screaming in the flames). She can’t help it if she has a sadistic side.

Engineer

Name: Mikawo Kojima

Age: Early 20s

Height: 5’0

Nationality: Japanese

Bio: Japan’s early-rising industrial revolutions in technology are best exemplified in Mikawo, a young upstart determined to rise to the top, learning everything she can and building the best of the best. Unfortunately, she’s never been the most creative but when you happen upon other people’s blueprints and happen to construct them first, what does it matter who came up with the “concept”?

At first, she appears to be every bit the quiet and demure young woman people expect, only when silk hides steel, that steel is a massive automatic sentry gun. She’s motivated by a distinct contempt for the people who get in her way. Especially those who try to be better than her. She enjoys the flexibility of English, especially the cusses, and she has no reservations about swearing up a storm, even if she still refuses to give a straight rejection, preferring instead to give a small “I’ll think about it.”

Quotes: “This GUN is fair use on your head!”

Demo

Name: Qingzhao Zeng

Age: Late 40s

Height: 5’3

Nationality: Chinese

Bio: The Zeng family has a long-standing family trade in demolitions and explosives, traced down the line all the way to the Song dynasty. Luckily, Qingzhao has sisters so, you know, it’s not all that important. She doesn’t even have to stop smoking and drinking. She hasn’t blown herself up (that much) so clearly, it’s working. Precision is for other people to worry about. She’s apathetic to a T, having seen everything. Measurements come from the heart. A pinch of gunpowder there, a splash of paint there.

Her family has a deep-seated rivalry with the DeGroots. Long ago in ancient China, a Zeng matriarch woke up in a cold sweat, a message from the stars to let them know of their Scottish rivals. Due to being a continent away from each other, the families have actually met each other only a handful of times, but the hatred needs to be kept up because, what if?

Turns out, Qingzhao has met Tavish even before finding employment under the Mann brothers. One drunken night, the two of them had a short, whirlwind friendship, sharing secrets and declaring each other to be their best friends. Luckily for them, they both forgot the night, merrily hating each other as tradition dictates. However, headaches and flashes of this terrible night haunt them both. Could they really get over centuries of hate and become friends?

Absolutely not.

Sniper

Name: Ansa Aaltonen

Age: 27

Height: 6’2

Nationality: Finnish

Bio: Snow. Sugar. Cocaine.  Her life is run by many white powders. Ansa is a professional sniper, with a sharp eye and a steady hand… when she isn’t also high as a kite, lost in the snowy wilderness of Finland and screeching to the sky. When you’re up in the dark and cold, you need something to give you a little pep in your step. It just so happens Ansa liked having a bit more pep than most.

She’s there for a THRILL. There’s nothing better to get your heart pumping at 200 beats per second than a good headshot, embracing the chill, and a hit of sugar. She no longer feels the cold or heat or even pain, shrugging it off until she collapses. It just makes her feel alive. She’s efficient, fast, and determined to get her kicks.

She has an unusual taste, living off fermented fish and tree bark. To most people around the Finnish wilderness, she’s nothing more than an urban legend, but she’s very real and she’s looking for some excitement, happily found in employment in the Gravel wars.

Spy

Name: Yvonne Pleshette [Real name N/A]

Age: 30s

Height: 5’8

Nationality: American (California)

Bio: The silver screen calls to his woman and she’s happy to answer. She trains herself to act in every possible role she can, having a wide range of accents, body languages, and backstories. To truly test herself, she gave up her identity long ago. Lately she’s been going by the name “Yvonne.”

The world of Hollywood is cutthroat and full of backstabbers so she learnt to cut throats and stab backs. While some people tell her the terms are metaphorical, nothing else has given her more roles. Living the mercenary life is simply gathering research for her roles (and earning some much-needed money in the process).

She presents herself as a classic film star, despite being a minor name at best, mostly because she’s always changing it. She has high standards but a cheapskate personality. She’s a bit of a bitch, happily criticising others, especially if they’re working with her. What can she say? She’s a diva.

[Slutshames other spy]

Quotes: “Ugh, actors these days, they know nothing about getting into character. They still have names.”

“’AHHHHH—’ Wait, no. Once more from the top. Scream in agony.”

Medic

Name: Susan Monks

Age: 30-40s

Height: 5’7

Nationality: American (New Jersey)

Bio: The American Healthcare system. Is there a more glorious sight? The exploitation of pain. The money. The debt. The fear it strikes into the entire population it’s designed to help. To Susan, there’s nothing better. She squeezes every last drop from the people she helps, working on a purely transactional lifestyle. She’ll never help someone unless she has all of their insurance information and the payment secure in her bank, and god forbid she ever accept help. It’s not like she can afford her own prices.

She’s very self-aware of her own corruption and proud of it, though she refuses to be exploited in the same way, suspicious of anything “free” but also doing her best not to pay for anything.

That said, she doesn’t much care for how good a job she does. In her eyes, asking for surgery is one thing. Asking for successful surgery is another. She has a variety of skills in both cosmetic and military medicine. She just wishes the license board would stop sending her “malpractice” letters. Ugh, stick to your own business. “Disappearing” all their messengers is becoming a pain.

Quotes: “Why get someone else to do something for you when you can scrounge a way to do it yourself?”

[zehecatl]

rec post for @f-eef that got too long for its own good, and is now just. a general rec post i guess

(as of writing, today is the steam summer sale! writing this before that goes live, so no guarantee everything on here is on sale, but! most of these are older games, so it’s likely. keep them in mind~)

- Iconoclasts my absolute favourite game, ever (along with OFF, but shh), if you check out one game from this list, let it be this one. it’s a genuinely almost flawless package, with gorgeous pixel art, fun gameplay, a really good story, and a cast of characters i just. adore. it’s so so so good, and three years later, i’m still not over it

- The Binding of Isaac so there’s this genre called roguelikes, wherein the whole gimmick is that, when you die, you gotta start from the Very Beginning; and the ‘point’ is getting better and better at the game, until you win! it’s super easy to just, play a few runs (they generally don’t last that long!), and then go on with your day, so it’s a really fun game to just waste time in, if you just wanna chill with some game. and, in my personal opinion, Isaac is the best roguelike game, with so much stuff to unlock, a whole slew of items to play with, and so much content it’s kind of unreal. i definitely think the DLCs are worth picking up, but it’s mostly for more content than like. actually being necessary

- Terraria it’s minecraft, but 2D. unlike MC, it’s got a bit of guidance, which i personally prefer, with bosses to fight and such. an absolutely BLAST with other people too

- A Hat in Time a 3D platformer, ala Mario, that’s just. super charming. it’s also really fun to play. i haven’t actually played the DLC’s, since i played it way back, but i’ve heard good things about Nyakuza Metro, which does look super slick, so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

- Slime Rancher you are a slime rancher. you ranch slimes. it’s honestly just wholesome as hell, and just exudes happy vibes. mostly for running around and collecting slimes, ngl

- The Messenger really funky retro game, wherein you play a ninja on a mission. it’s primary draw is definitely in its gameplay, but there’s a surprising amount of story for this kind of genre? i honestly really just like this one. it’s neat

- Underhero you play as a cute minion, who kind of like. managed to kill the hero. and whoops, guess you’re doing his job now? it’s got that undertale vibe, though i’d say it’s less polished than it. HOWEVER, it’s absolutely lovely and it’s climax is REALLY good

- Hatoful Boyfriend bird dating sim. trust me. the ‘secret’ finale route is just. *chef’s kiss* fantastic

- Night in the Woods if you don’t mind having a very poignant sad time, oh my god, i could not recommend NITW more. it perfectly captures that period when you’re done with school, and suddenly your whole life is stretching before you, and you feel so so fucking lost, and overwhelmed and pained with it. it’s just. so good. a sadness worth experiencing 

- Shovel Knight another retro game! this one is, pretty much, the king of the genre, and for very good reasons. the first one (shovel of hope) doesn’t have much story, but the latter ones really add on it. they’re honestly just, really solid games! with funky knight characters!!!

- Hyper Light Drifter man, it’s just a masterpiece. everything about it is perfect. it’s been like, five years, and it’s still one of the very best indie games

- Tell Me Why it’s currently free for june! and it’s a story game! plus, if you like the genre, the devs got the ‘Life Is Strange’ serie(s) to delve into!

- Cat Quest honestly, i just really like this little game. the gameplay is SO much fun, and everything else is just. really charming :’)

- Yoku’s Island Express metroidvania, where you play as a dung-beetle post officer, and the gimmick is that it’s pinball-y! it’s really fun, and very cute and just an all around good time :)

- Owlboy you play as an owl boy! named Otus! and you can fly around, and there’s GORGEOUS pixel graphics, and a neat story, and just. the BEST cast of characters. it’s delightful

- Yuppie Psycho + Count Lucanor just gonna bundle these two together, because they’re both REALLY GOOD. YP is the newer one, and is therefore probably ‘the better one’, but i like them both a ton! they’re 2D horror, but i wouldn’t say they’re that spooky? though that might just be because they’re pixel games! you explore spooky place, and weird stuff happens around you. just a really fun time :)

- Angels of Death my FAVOURITE rpgmaker game, it’s main draw is, a 100%, the main characters and the relationship that develops between them. i just love it a whole lot, and it’s got that lil’ tinge of horror that i, personally, fucking adore. there’s actually an anime based on this, but i haven’t seen it myself!

- Celeste curve ball! it’s a 2D platformer! it’s really good, got a ton of accessibility features, and has like. the tightest gameplay- and, on top of that, surprisingly emotional story! 

- Bastion putting Bastion here, because it’s actually the only one i’ve properly played, but you could probably buy any of the Supergiant Games, and come out satisfied. Bastion is the oldest of the bunch, and is definitely a bit less polished for it, but i personally adore it; the gameplay probably hasn’t aged that well, but i think the story and presentation more than makes up for it

- The Darkside Detective funny point and click adventure, with great wit, and a pair of characters i kind of simply adore. it’s main draw is definitely its humour

- Littlewood very wholesome and chill farming game, that feels more like an RPG than something like stardew valley- i’d not recommend it over SV, but if you want more of SV, Littlewood might scratch that itch!

- Pony Island + The Hex absolutely adore both of these, though if i had to rec only one, it’d probably be Pony Island? they’ve both got that undertale-off vibe, though Pony Island definitely leans harder into it. very interesting plays, both of them

- Oxenfree another horror-ish game! primarily story-focused, but oh boy, what a story! i’m a BIG fan of this game, and the sequel was recently announced too! definitely worth a look if you like ghost shenanigans

- Creature in the Well wasn’t a 100% sure if i should rec this, but beside the finale boss, i really enjoyed my time with this! it’s this weird pinball inspired hack and slash, with some amazing vibes

- Kindergarten 1 + 2 they’re just fun little games okay. the 2nd is much more fleshed out, but the 1st one is really fun too

- the Henry Stickmin collection I JUST... LIKE THESE GAMES A LOT... i think you can find the old versions somewhere on the internet, if you wanna check them out first? idk, they’re fun!

- LIMBO + INSIDE personally, i like INSIDE more, but both of these are classics, and also they’re made by a danish team, and i like them a WHOLE LOT

- The Final Station i could not tell you why i like this game as much as i do, but oh my god. i love this game? it’s got a dying world, neat pixel graphics, big zombie apocalypse vibes, and a weird little story

- Year Walk i love Year Walk :)

- Smile For Me if you liked undertale’s lovely cast of characters, oh boy, you’d likely LOVE this game! it’s really, really, fantastic, and the epilogue (not in the actual game lol) hit me right in the feels

- Pikuniku just a fun little game! there’s not really much there, in the grand scheme of things, but it’s a wonderful little play, one of those games that just sets out to give you a good time, and absolutely success. i like it a lot :’)

- A Short Hike wonderful game, where it’s more about exploring the island than actively finishing the game. it’s real wonderful

- ULTRAKILL ANOTHER CURVEBALL! no idea if you like FPS, but oh my god. ULTRAKILL is so fucking good. just an absolute blast to play. there’s a demo to check out, and i’d definitely recommend it, because if it’s a genre you might like, you’ll love this one (OH also it’s in early access, which means it’s not finished yet! personally, i don’t mind that, especially considering this is more gameplay focused, but ya’ know!)

- My Friend Pedro it’s honestly just really fun to play, and sometimes i still think about the implied lore, and go all !!!!

- Little Misfortune another point and click! this one is pretty short, and is set within the same universe as their other game, Fran Bow, which is much bigger, but idk. i like this one. it’s dark cute

- This Strange Realm of Mine i honestly dunno how to explain this one, because it’s kind of weird and a bit odd, but i really like it, in all its weird poetic glory. it’s neat!

- Donut County you’re a terrible racoon who’s ruined the whole city with holes. it’s great and i love it

- OneShot another ‘gives me undertale vibes’, though this one was in development before UT, if i recall correctly! it’s so good, and it’s got some fantastic meta bits, and i love Niko. i love Niko so much

- Inmost gorgeous vaguely spooky game with a neat story... my favourite genre

- Sayonara Wild Hearts i’d call this more of a spectacle than anything else, but oh my god. what a spectacle it is! the OST is amazing, everything about it just hits right, and even if you suck at the gameplay (which i did), it really doesn’t matter, in my opinion? it’s just great all around!

[heleneplays]

RELICS MC PROFILE

Helene Spillane || Linguist

Ethnicity: (in-game) American, with Chinese descent || (hc) American, with Chinese & Filipino descent :)

Personality Stats: (end of Book 1) Suspicious - 63% • Professional - 51% • Spiritual - 57% • Altruistic - 84% • Adventurous - 68%

Skill Stats: [I forgot to screenshot my first from book 1 so i'm gonna use the sequel demo stats ( •̩̥̀ω•̩̥̀ )7 ] Subterfuge - 12 • Gunplay - 11 • Charm - 7 • Reactions 5 • Fisticuffs - 3 • Athleticism - 3

Priorities: Money • Academic Reputation • Politics • Glory

Relationships: All in wonderful standing || Everyone alive & healthy

Orientation: Lesbian 👭🏽💖

Romance Option: Still not over María García Pérez & is hoping and yearning to get back with her

Other Info

Birthday: January 10th

Height: 5'1 1/2

Blood Type: O+

Parent/s Status: Disowned Hasn't talked with one another for serveral years now || because of their fighting over her career, lifestyle choices & sexual orientation

Fun Facts:

She considers herself to be raised by her Grandpa Jack + Molly & Grandma Elíza, since her parents... she didn't have a typical childhood, that's all I can say.

Learned how to pickpocket, dance & shoot a gun from Jack; learned how to cook, dress fashionably, and take care of people from Molly; learned how to be unapologetic yet unfailingly charming, fine-tune her presence, and sharpen her instincts from Elíza.

Combined, they all taught her how to play & gamble like a pro, including cheating in the games :) [spoilers ;)]

A natural polyglot, learned & fluent in 16 languages by age 9;;; one of the reasons she got into archeology was bc of her fascination with the way humans developed languages (and also her morbid curiousity abt the dead)

But also it's about the adventure <3

Talented in the arts, which helped her as a visual learner; keeps it secret because it's something private she likes to keep. Much like her past with María 😔

Favorite season is Winter because it means cold air, ice skating trips, going in the woods, and cuddles 😳

Outgoing & Friendly, allegedly. Actually v Private & Sarcastic at the privacy of her own home or with trusted friends

Hates smoking but loves drinking

Her aesthetic is primarily rooted on elegance & a dash of hominess, and a lot of functionality

Generally obeys rules, but bends or breaks it if needs must

Radiates BDE x2 (Big Dick Energies & Big Dumbass Energies)

Can and Will kill if it's nazi lives 😌🔪

hmmm what else

OH YEAH

FOSTERS CATS WHEN SHE'S NOT ON AN EXPEDITION BC SHE'S V SOFT FOR THEM AND ALSO IT'S ABOUT LOVING MAJESTIC CREATURES

---

So far that's the extent of my ideas for my MC bc to be honest the bullet points just said: Disaster lesbian for María, Big Dumbass Genius, & in possession of only one (1) functioning braincell

ANYWAYS I just want to thank Mr. James Shaw again for developing this game universe :') I'm just so inspired for it and I scream everytime he just comes out popping into my notifs :'D

but seriously, my clownery? in this blog?? being noticed by OG source of all these??? I am dying from a mix of glee, shock, and shame. I am small and baby & I don't know how to cope other than memes and more memes like the absolute clown I am 😳👉🏻👈🏻 ANYWAYS if you're still reading up to this point,,,, so sorry for making u read all my ramblings & THANK YOU 💖💖💖

[ramblefang]

TOH s2 ep2

Been a bit since I’ve done the first episode, but now I’m at this thing. Also, I guess I’m doing this liveblog style since I’ve already paused the episode a few times to think about things within the first four minutes. So I’ll just start over and start from there.

00:02 - Even on my first go around I noticed “Blight” on the sign to this factory and connected it to Amity’s family. Gives some extra meaning to the name.

00:30 - So the Blights sell “security”, but also suggest that they are really what amounts to an arms manufacturer. It might be why all of their potential customers are cloaked, hiding their identities. It may be preferable to not let it known that one is purchasing weapons and security, especially if anything here is less than ethical.

Oh, and I believe this is the first time we see the Blight parents. At most we saw them as silhouettes in flashback: when they forced Amity to stop being friends with Willow.

00:42 - An oracle, huh? That could make for some difficult challenges, assuming mother-Blight becomes a significant antagonist. Also, father-Blight looks really worn out; wonder how much say he has in business affairs.

02:00 - And of course, they’ve separated Amity from a friend before, so they’ll definitely be willing to do it again.

03:02 - As one would expect from what we know of their backstories, Lilith is upright and attentive while Eda is distracted. Having the mentor figure of the previous season suddenly be the “problem student that learns differently” would be quite unique—also relatable as I am someone who figured out I was ADHD as an adult.

03:14 - These three (or more, along with Luz’s friends) encountering more glyphs is something I’m excited about: all of them learning together instead of the adults generally knowing everything

03:20 - I figure these sisters would have some good ideas about where to find more glyphs. I’m not sure how to interpret the expression, but it might be a knowing look shared between them.

03:45 - Eda fumbling around and immediately trying whatever she thinks might work is probably just how she learns. Being told what not to do, trying to provide rigid structure to learning, is what she greatly dislikes about formal education. I say just let her make mistakes; it’s probably how she ended up becoming the greatest sorceress of The Burning Isles after all.

03:58 - King in charge? Oh no. (Oh yes!)

04:14 - Okay, to be fair to Luz, apparently she did properly understand that Eda was impatient to get back to her former glory. Something that Eda might have to come to terms with, over the course of the season (and beyond) is that she may never reach those heights again. Just pure speculation on what sorts of themes the show may be exploring

04:25 - Ah, so that’s where Lilith is likely to be wrong about things as well: being so attached to doing things “perfectly” and “correctly”. It’ll probably be that their approaches to learning need to mix: not exactly “meet in the middle” because that implies abandoning their respective extremes. Or at the very least, they can come to terms about how they learn differently from one another

04:36 - I just noticed Lilith is wearing a blouse of a battery icon on low charge. No doubt something that Eda scavenged in the human world, but I wonder if there’s any symbolism to it. Guess there’s how these sisters are depowered, but maybe there’s something more unique for Lilith to be wearing it?

Also, it’s just funny.

05:24 - Ah. A pie made of fairies, rather than a pie might by fairies [or as fairies would make it]. Topped with an additional pun even! Fairy [Very] fresh indeed

05:31 - Also cute Amity blush

05:50 - The Blight parents are wasting no time I see

06:00 - Yeah, father Blight looking like he has ADHD or some form of neurodivergency at least. Curious how he will fit into the narrative, because mother Blight seems to be the more clear antagonist here.

06:15 - Comes off as a joke in the moment, but I wonder if he said “executed” out of force of habit

06:25 - Damn, the way that Amity’s fire was immediately quenched.

08:00 - Concerned that Luz is only being seen as a rare commodity, and that this apparent cordiality, along with these circumstances, are just meant to ensnare her. Not to say that Luz was their main goal, I’m sure that punishing Amity was what they came for, but they probably recognize Luz as a unique opportunity

08:47 - So the magic Eda is used to is literally a lot more fluid, accommodating to her creativity. The glyphs are fundamentally more rigid, potentially necessitating Eda to learn something from her sister.

09:06 - Yeah, Eda is used to being the best. This seems like it’ll be central to some big problems in the future; Eda being tempted by a shortcut to power or something maybe.

09:25 - Huh, Principal Bump is surprisingly fond of these troublemakers.

11:00 - Oh gosh, Luz going to see the Blight parents (Alador and Odalia apparently) on her own is the most dangerous outcome.

11:30 - Ooo, Eda has made some progress with making a custom glyph. Potentially very dangerous, but also exciting.

12:50 - Not looking as bad as I had feared thus far, but helping to demo security automatons and weapons is dangerous in its own right. Stopping to think about things, I guess Luz being human has never been that big of a deal. Though, maybe her performance here will spark unsavory interest in her

13:14 - Team Fortress 2 reference? Almost vaguely shaped like the sticky bomb launcher. Could easily be a coincidence.

13:38 - Oh! Willow has two dads!? Did we already know that from season 1? I certainly don’t recall it. Very cool regardless.

14:20 - My immediate thought is to try doing all of it at once. Though, I guess Willow’s sneaky approach isn’t exactly compatible with Amity’s.

14:51 - A good ol’ crossbow with non-functioning limbs just to bother anyone that notices

16:05 - Yeah okay, so Odalia planned for this to be Luz’s execution.

16:31 - Wonder what kinds of gasses would be piped in a magical arms production facility. Quite possible that it’s just for visual effect, but still makes me curious from a worldbuilding perspective

16:58 - “My Luz” you say Amity? I like it.

18:30 - You go Amity!

19:37 - Hmm, Alador seems to have more control than initially presented. In context, it suggests that he might be someone to be trusted, yet he still is fine with pushing Amity for “success”. He certainly doesn’t show any interest in Amity making friends, which only happened to be beneficial here.

And he’s immediately back to being an easily distracted goof. Maybe it’s not a persona per se, but I can imagine him being far more threatening than this lets on. We already know for a fact that he’s competent at building powerful abominations if nothing else.

21:18 - Of course the state is purchasing all of the weapons.

[mwolf0epsilon]

Fic Request: Miss Twisted is causing some manner of trouble Alice Angel shows up, lectures her, and then drags her away by the ear and says something like "I have a perfectly good dinner getting cold at home and you're doing THIS"? Miss Twisted then tries to apologize and make it up to Alice.

Summary: A slight mistake in her schedule gives Miss Twisted a taste of trouble in paradise.

---

[[MORE]]

It wasn't often that the stars aligned for the sort of mischief that they were getting up to, but oh if the Society didn't enjoy it all the more when they got the chance to show up the Butcher Gang in a nice game of robbing the bank blind!

They'd used the troublesome trio of dopes as their distraction, breaking into the vault while they attempted their stick-up. Filled their bags and pockets with as much cash as possible, and then things really got interesting. You see, Charley wasn't one to share a heist, and neither was Miss Twisted. The glory would fall upon the most ruthless criminals, and that prestigious title was going to which ever of the gangs could get away with the plundered riches.

The battle was on.

"Getting tired are we?!" Missy cackled as she stared down the end of her opponent's retreating and swinging switchblade, her own dagger parrying blows aimed at her long springy arms. "What's the matter Charley boyo? Too old to tango with a dame?"

"In your dreams, princess!" He flashed her an ugly toothy grimace. "I ain't no pirate, but I can pull my weight in a swordfight. This is just the warm up!"

"Then warm up faster Charles, because the ladies don't like cold feet!" She flashed her own sharp grin at him.

"I'll remember that if I ever meet a lady then." He smirked.

"Why I oughta..." She swung her blade faster, trying to get him off balance. Behind her she could hear the struggles as Cameraman wrestled for control of their getaway vehicle from the meddling Barley, while the Brute was defending their spoils from the itsy bitsy Edgar who was trying to lasso a few bags out of his reach.

One lucky swing caught the side of Charley's blade and sent it flying from his grasp, leaving him weaponless and at the edge of the truck's open back.

"My, my... Seems like Lady Luck has a new favourite." Missy chuckled "And it ain't the leprechaun, it seems."

"Keep yappin' girly, even if you win this fight, the Butcher Gang will come on top in the end. We always do." The older male sneered. Barley and Edgar were at a loss for what to do, either continue their endeavours or risk losing their boss.

"Bouillonburg has a new crime syndicate and it sure doesn't need a trio of has-beens calling the shots anymore." And they'd all know it from this day forward, as soon as she sent the infamous leader of the Butcher Gang flying out of the back of a moving truck.

Or, she would of, if not for the truck suddenly coming to a halt and sending everyone tumbling about at the sudden stop.

"Oi! Cam what gives?!" The demoness cried out as she pushed Charley off her. "Warn a gal, wouldn't ya? I coulda snapped my neck!"

"I err... Uhm... I am quite certain that that is the least of your troubles right now..." Cameraman called back from the cabin.

"Oh yeah? Why's that?!" She put her hands on her hips and looked towards the cabin. Just barely able to make out her friend's small body and the stilts he was using to reach the pedals.

"Because I'm very certain your very angry girlfriend that is standing in front of the truck, is probably higher up on the list..." Cameraman replied as he sunk slightly in his seat to escape the glare of a very upset angel.

Miss Twisted stood there, baffled for a second, before startling.

"Oh crud, what day is it?"

"Erm...Tuesday? Barley offered.

"The 10th!" Edgar added, before tapping his chin thoughtful. "Of November!"

".....Papa Pluto's crooked teeth, I forgot our anniversary!!!" The demoness cried out in horror. She was so screwed.

"You're kidding... You forgot your anniversary?!" Cameraman looked as incredulous as a camera could. "That's low, even for you Missy."

"And rude." Brute huffed. "Missy should apologize to pretty angel lady!"

"I can't go out there! She'll eat me alive!" Her arms quickly twisted around her own head in an attempt to hide her face.

"Honestly, with Alice? Kinda deserved." Charley snorted.

"Agreed, ya should feel ashamed for standin' up the poor lass." Barley scolded.

"Yeah... We may be villains, but we'd never be so rude as to forget a date!" Edgar crossed his arms.

"None of you have girlfriends you jerks!" Missy protested.

"Uh... Charley and Barley are married?" Cameraman gawked at her. "And Brute has a boyfriend?"

"Since when?!"

"Three weeks. Long distance. They write each other... Am I the only one that listens to either of you rambling during breakfast?!" Cameraman was in disbelief.

"And yes, we're married. Edgar's our kid... We're literally a crime family." Charley pointed out.

"Pretty angel lady coming over." Brute pointed out. True to his words, the upset angel was floating over to meet them, and if looks could kill...

"Uh-oh..."

"Nice knowing you Missy. I'm taking all your stuff when you die."

"No fair! Brute want nice radio!"

"I don't need another radio, so we've got a deal big fella."

"I'm not gonna die!"

"I SPENT HOURS SLAVING OVER A STOVE AND WAITING FOR YOU, AND YOU'RE OUT HERE DOING THIS?!"

"I'm gonna die!"

-

Miss Twisted didn't die in the end, but from the scolding she'd gotten alone she might as well have died a little inside. Hell had nothing on the righteous fury of an angel crossed. Needless to say, making it up to Alice would not be easy. Especially when she's been robbing a bank and told the getaway driver to drive as recklessly and dangerously as possible in a busy road close to a school.

Thankfully, Missy was a resourceful lady. She knew how to turn situations around. Go big or go home, right? And even if it cramped her style, she'd tolerate a few of the hobbies her lady love fancied.

Playing the part of good samaritan was gag worthy, but if it made Alice happy, she'd oblige. There were ways to uphold her reputation as an emissary of misery, anyway...

And oh, if the next big hits she had planned wouldn't fix a month's worth of good deeds then nothing would! Go big or go home indeed.

The Butcher Gang wouldn't stay on top for much longer, and her girlfriend couldn't stay mad forever!

First thing was first tho, use a lot of the plundered riches to pay for a reservation at a fancy restaurant and wardrobe and accessories to match. Angel or not, Alice was still an appreciator of the mushy romantic stuff. Miss Twisted would just have to also make it up to the boys later.

[nerianasims]

Billboard #1s 1986

Under the cut.

Dionne & Friends -- "That's What Friends Are For" -- January 18, 1986

While listening to this song, I think it's a very squishy ballad with a nice sentiment that's not for me but is tolerable. Until a certain point. That point is when Elton John has his big part. Dionne Warwick, Stevie Wonder, Gladys Knight: Great, amazing, I love them, and though their talents are wasted on a song this slight, they make it listenable. Elton John's talents are not wasted on a song this slight. Couldn't they have brought in someone else? There's no way Prince would do something like this, but what about Paul McCartney? Kenny Loggins? Billy Ocean? I guess George Michael was too young for the song's schtick. But I'd take even Lionel Richie over Elton John.

Whitney Houston -- "How Will I Know" -- February 15, 1986

Whitney Houston was an amazing, phenomenally talented singer. And she oversang. Almost all the time. She didn't have to; she knew how to sing with subtlety and grace. But oversinging was (and is) popular, so that's what she did. It means I don't like most of her songs, including this one.

Mr. Mister -- "Kyrie" -- March 1, 1986

I'm not Christian any more, but one can pull inspiration from anywhere. I love the phrase "kyrie eleison." There's something beautiful about that combination of sounds, and there's also something beautiful about the sentiment. The music does not live up to it, unfortunately, though the opening is gorgeous. It also gets super repetitive at the end. It's pretty good, but I want it to be great, and sadly it is not.

Starship -- "Sara" -- March 15, 1986

I'm going to have to listen to "White Rabbit" a dozen times to cleanse this from my brain. A band that used to do stuff like that devolving into making this garbage is extremely depressing. This song starts with music box tinkling which sounds nice. Then saxophone over it which... okay. Just the sax would have been nice, but over the music box it's a little much, but I can keep going with it. Then they add a harmonica layered over it, and it's like I'm listening to a parody of mid-80s easy listening. And then randomly there's a drum crash and the weak voice of this guy comes in along with massive synth, and I start to wonder if I'm being punked. Are we sure this song wasn't a joke?

Heart -- "These Dreams" -- March 22, 1986

I watched the video probably hundreds of times when I was a kid. (On Betamax!) I adore this song. I got to it and went well, this is gonna win 1986, because there's only so much rational distance I can take from what was my favorite pop song when I was 9 years old. This song didn't start my Romantic sensibility, but it spoke to what was already in bloom. "There's something out there I can't resist." We'll see what else is on the list.

Falco -- "Rock Me Amadeus" -- March 29, 1986

I love the movie Amadeus, even though it constitutes a massive slander against poor Salieri. It gets Mozart pretty spot-on though. And I always loved classical music, was surrounded by it from infancy, so I was glad to see its popularity spread by the movie. (Yes, at age nine. I've always been a huge nerd.) This song is really fun and well-made too, though of course I can't understand any of the German lyrics.

Prince -- "Kiss" -- April 19, 1986

Prince sings this almost entirely in falsetto, so one would guess I would hate it, since falsetto usually sends me running in the other direction. One would be wrong. I adore it. Prince was that kind of artist -- he could get away with anything. He was notoriously arrogant, but was it really arrogance when it was just a proper conception of his own abilities? Anyway,

of course "you don't have to be cool to rule my world" deeply spoke to my experiences. I was the most uncool girl in school. Until high school, when somehow my not giving a damn about being cool (as I'd failed at it my whole life) actually helped me.

Also when Prince drops to a low note on the last "kiss," it is incredibly hot.

Robert Palmer -- "Addicted to Love" -- May 3, 1986

I have no idea what I'd think of this song without the video. The video infuriates me. The clone-looking emotionless women aren't "sexualized." No, you have to be treated like a human being on at least some level for that. They are purely objectified, treated literally as blank interchangeable things, with nothing at all inside them. The song is skeevy anyway, though I guess the music's good. But blech.

Pet Shop Boys -- "West End Girls" -- May 10, 1986

I've never liked this song and I've never really understood why. It's the kind of song I felt I should like. But I've always felt (since I noticed it as a teenager) that there was something missing. Now I know why: According to the Stereogum article about it, the band leader doesn't like rock n'roll, and is a pop critic. Oh. Some rock is exactly what this song needs. Without it, it's too cold and removed, and to me sounds smug. Also how can you be a pop critic and not like rock n' roll? That is a wrongness.

Whitney Houston -- "Greatest Love of All" -- May 17, 1986

Whitney Houston doesn't oversing on this song as much as usual, so that's good. Though she still oversings. What's not good are the music and lyrics. The music is bland as can be. Lyrically, it starts with "I believe the children are our future" and there's a verse about "the beauty they possess inside." Blargh.

Then after the first verse there's a total change in theme, going into how the narrator never found anyone to look up to. And that the "greatest love" is loving yourself and only depending on yourself and no one else. I despise this sentiment deep in my bones. Not of loving yourself -- though the song claims that's "easy to achieve," which is bollocks of the first order. Rather that you should only depend on yourself. That's literally inhuman. We are social creatures; without depending on each other, we are adrift in nothingness. So yeah. I hate this song.

Madonna -- "Live to Tell" -- June 7, 1986

This song gives me chills. The music is gorgeous and perfectly suited to the lyrics. I listened to the "True Blue" tape many, many times from about age 10 until, um. Well, I listened to the album on Spotify the other night. This song is the standout for me on it. I always thought that Madonna was singing about having been emotionally abused as a child herself. That is apparently not it at all; it's a song for a movie soundtrack. But to me it's about familial abuse. And always has been. It felt like she was singing for me. "The light that you could never see/ It shines inside, you can't take that from me."

Patti LaBelle & Michael McDonald -- "On My Own" -- June 14, 1986

Not the Les Miz song, sadly. It's about how the narrators are breaking up. Patti LaBelle is great, but I am so bored. Michael McDonald isn't bad, but he can't match Patti LaBelle, and even she can't stop this song from being deadly dull. It took me like 5 tries to be able to listen to the whole thing.

Billy Ocean -- "There'll Be Sad Songs (To Make You Cry)" -- July 5, 1986

What makes someone decide to put a parenthetical in a song title? Is there a formula? Anyway, he's singing (in his head) to someone he wants to be with. The "sad songs" are not actually supposed to be sad songs, it seems, but love songs that make him think of her. I guess. I don't know. Something about this song is turning my brain to mush. The tinkly parts and the violins are nice I guess. But I'm going to fall asleep at my desk if I try to listen to this song any more.

Simply Red -- "Holding Back the Years" -- July 12, 1986

Just looking at the lyrics, this song should be deeply depressing. He feels that so far his life has been a waste, but somehow he'll "keep holding on." There's a beautiful saxophone part. The song is not depressing -- it's Blues. It's terribly sad and cathartic at the same time. I'm not thrilled with Mick Hucknall's voice though.

Genesis -- "Invisible Touch" -- July 19, 1986

I did not pay attention to any of the lyrics of this song except the chorus until just now. I thought it was about a woman with an "invisible touch" whom people fall for left and right, and that's true. What I did not know was that she was supposed to be doing it on purpose. Which, okay, sort of like "Maneater"? Except no, because "Well I don't really know her, I only know her name." Then how do you know this about her?! He sounds like a stalker. Or this sounds like a first draft. The music is good enough, and the chorus could make for a good song around it lyrically, if they had bothered with that.

Peter Gabriel -- "Sledgehammer" -- July 26, 1986

I used to think this song was meant to be about a guy who was going to basically tank for you (and also have sex with you.) Well, apparently he wants to solve only one of your problems in particular: namely, that of your lacking orgasms. The "sledgehammer" is supposed to be a metaphor for his dick. Ow? Whatever, I'm going with my own interpretation of it. I like the beginning flute part, which is actually from a keyboard demo. It's a fun song, but it gets pretty repetitive.

Peter Cetera -- "Glory of Love" -- August 2, 1986

"We did it all for the glory of love" is a sentiment I usually adore. But this song is a limp dishrag. Did what for the glory of love? Why does she seem to be thinking of leaving him? And Peter Cetera being "the man who will fight for your honor" is a hilarious idea. His voice is nasally and he sounds like a faker. He comes off as someone who only vaguely understands the small-r romance of flowers and chocolates, and not at all as someone who understands the Romance of a castle far away. Bryan Adams did much better with this kind of thing in the 90s.

Madonna -- "Papa Don't Preach" -- August 16, 1986

The article I'm reading about this says there was a controversy over this song regarding abortion somehow, with left-wingers being upset that the narrator didn't consider it and right-wingers praising her for keeping the baby. Maybe in California. That is not what I remember in Michigan, and I do clearly remember a controversy. What I remember is right-wingers being absolutely incensed that Madonna was singing about the pregnancy of an unmarried young woman (or teenager, though I always felt the narrator was college-age) at all. I also remember one on the radio being angry that this working class girl was keeping her baby rather than giving it up to a rich family.

It is a really good song. Actually it is kinda Romantic. The narrator's in a dramatic life-changing situation, she has to choose whether or not to marry a guy before she's sure she's ready, and there are intense violins. Her father disapproves of her boyfriend, but she needs her father's advice. She's also not ashamed. She's in a difficult situation, but there's no guilt. Good. And this is what made so many people so angry with Madonna, and what was so deeply important about Madonna. She refused to even pretend to be guilty about sex in her music, ever.

Steve Winwood -- "Higher Love" -- August 30, 1986

I think this is about wanting to believe in a god. But then there's "I could make the sun shine from pure desire." Maybe it's about Aphrodite. Chaka Khan sings on this song, and she's obviously the best thing about it. It's not great, but it's enjoyable enough.

Bananarama -- "Venus" -- September 6, 1986

Speaking of higher loves. Bananarama are obviously having a wonderful time singing this 80s dance version of this song, and who wouldn't? The "she's got it" of the song of course also means "I've got it", hence "I'm your Venus." And Bananarama leans into that in a really fun way. It's a great version of a great song.

Berlin -- "Take My Breath Away" -- September 13, 1986

This is the big love ballad from Top Gun. I have managed to escape ever seeing Top Gun, though I've picked up some ideas about it. Mainly that it's a commercial for the U.S. air force, that Tom Cruise looks blank in it a lot, and that there's some kind of volleyball scene. Before I knew it was a commercial for the U.S. air force and therefore avoided it, I avoided it because of Tom Cruise. He has always been a total cold shower to me. As I've said since I started noticing these things (which was right around 1986), he reminds me of a Ken doll.

So the song. It sounds more like it belongs with a fantasy movie than in a modern military movie. Though I guess Top Gun is a fantasy too. But not the kind in which people usually look through hourglasses. It's a big, emotional ballad. I like it but I don't love it. If it weren't associated with Top Gun possibly I'd like it more.

Huey Lewis and the News -- "Stuck With You" -- September 20, 1986

This is a middle-aged man singing to his middle-aged wife about how he's "happy to be stuck with you." It's like if dad jokes became sentient and got married. It's cute and bouncy, and honestly pretty true-to-life. You can't be all higher love all the time.

Janet Jackson -- "When I Think of You" -- October 11, 1986

If "Nasty" had gotten to #1, it would have taken my "best of the year" spot. Sadly, it didn't, and this was Janet Jackson's first #1. "When I Think of You" is a really good song though. Janet Jackson is the best of the Jacksons and always was in every way. I think she was even a better dancer than Michael. (I don't know about "is", considering her age, but she's still a better artist.) "When I Think of You" is a very simple love song lyrically. When her "world gets crazy," she thinks of you to calm down. If this were easy listening, it would be unbearable. But it's a dance song, and a fun one. There's some great bass and interesting syncopation.

Cyndi Lauper -- "True Colors" -- October 25, 1986

This is such a beautiful song. It's helped me through some rough times ever since it came out -- the tape it's on was one of my first. It's straightforward in both lyrics and music, so there's not much to say about it besides that it's a great song.

Boston -- "Amanda" -- November 8, 1986

I am listening to this song now, and I don't recognize it. When they get to the chorus near the end it sounds kinda familiar, but I'm not sure that's because I recognize this song in particular, or because it sounds like every song like this in existence was put in a blender and this is the resulting slurry. Either this wasn't played on the radio much where I lived, or I changed the channel as soon as it was. It wants to be a power ballad, but it's an absolute nothing.

The Human League -- "Human" -- November 22, 1986

I guess it's an apology song, but "I'm only human" doesn't sit right with me as a real apology for something truly bad. He cheated on her. Which I do consider forgivable, depending on the circumstances and apology, but his is that she wasn't around so he was driven to cheat on her. And he should forgive her because he's "only human." Then the woman comes in and says she cheated on him too when they were apart, because she's human too. That makes the song tolerable. Maybe they need an open relationship. They still both sound whiny. And I don't like the music. It's boring and repetitive.

Bon Jovi -- "You Give Love a Bad Name" -- November 29, 1986

SHOT THROUGH THE HEART! AND YOU'RE TO BLAME! I love this song. Also I thought Jon Bon Jovi was hot at the time, though nowadays that 80s perm is hilarious. His voice is still hot though (so is he nowadays, grey hair and all, with his more contemporary haircut.) This song got plenty of radio play. Still does. And deserves it. It's technically a heartbreak song I suppose, but the video gets it right: It's Bon Jovi goofing around on stage in front of a joyous crowd. I love the bass, I love the guitars, and I did mention Jon Bon Jovi's voice is hot, right? Voices over looks every time for me, though both together is obviously welcome.

Peter Cetera and Amy Grant -- "The Next Time I Fall" -- December 6, 1986

Christian fundies had a deep and abiding hatred for Peter Cetera. Maybe they still do. I encountered this multiple times online over the years, and finally looked it up -- it's because of this song. Amy Grant used to be a singer of Christian music only. Then she had a pop hit with this dweeb, and certain usual suspects decided she was being corrupted by him.

The only way this song could corrupt anyone is if they started smashing things because they were so bored. The narrators have been heartbroken but are gonna try it again with each other, and it's as passionless as possible. Amy Grant's a better singer than Cetera by a ways, as she does not sing through her nose, but it's not like anyone could elevate this sludge.

Bruce Hornsby and the Range -- "The Way It Is" -- December 13, 1986

People are racist and treat poor people like shit. And people say that's just the way it is, but don't you believe them. This is true. We have come incredibly far, and things change. It's a good sermon, but as a song it's too simplistic for me, both musically and lyrically. I agree with the sentiment, but it's not a song I really want to listen to either.

The Bangles -- "Walk Like an Egyptian" -- December 20, 1986

Of course I loved this song when I was a kid, all the kids did. But I was already a Bangles fan. I had their first tape, which is their best and has the least pop sheen. I would prefer "Hero Takes a Fall" had been a big hit, but oh well. "Walk Like an Egyptian" is still fun.

BEST OF 1986 -- "These Dreams" by Heart  WORST OF 1986 -- "Sara" by Starship

[nocturne-inuyasha-ff]

Chapter Nineteen: To Have and to Hold

Nocturne - Chapter Nineteen: To Have and to Hold

Rated - M (for very, very suggestive adult themes, references to some violence, and coarse language)

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha.

Kagome had traveled nearly a week with no luck. This "come and find" me business was getting ridiculous. Sesshomaru should have left a trail of breadcrumbs or something, but no. Nothing.

She had been through villages, serving where she could and asking the townspeople for information, but no one had heard of Lord Sesshomaru or knew of any regal yokai living in the area.

Many of the places she stopped at held a hatred of yokai, spitting at her feet when she asked after one. Thankfully, her new companion, Rei, only had one tail and could pass as a cat. People did, however, find it odd that a cat traveled with her, but none were brave enough to mention it. They all just passed it off as some strange, new miko custom.

Kagome had gotten creative with her questions when she passed through to another village. Sesshomaru was very private and not likely to have rumors of himself or his holdings. Instead, she would cleverly ask for news of the area.

She did not learn anything of value, just gossip from one place to the next. Kagome had to hold out hope that she would pick up a lead soon.

Kami finally blessed her on the seventh day. Kagome had stopped in a village for the night after providing healing services for a family under the guise of a spiritual ritual. People in the Sengoku era didn't have a grasp on the concept of modern medicine and were often astounded by Kagome's abilities. Most confused medicine with magic, and it was a good thing that she also was a miko by profession. Otherwise, people may not be so kind and generous to her.

The family that Kagome had helped were allowing her and her peculiar-looking cat to stay the night. During the evening, she conversed with them congenially, speaking of everything and nothing as strangers may do.

"The weather has been mild for this time of year."

"Yes, I am thankful for that. The good weather aids me on my pilgrimage," Kagome replied.

"We are so grateful that your travels brought you to us. You have lifted the evil that has plagued our little one. It is an evil afflicting many this season."

Kagome knew that most in this time, confused sickness with evil maladies placed on them for sins committed, and there was little to persuade them otherwise. Sometimes she tried, though. "That is a misfortune brought on by the mild weather I'm afraid."

"The weather, you say? We had thought the evil preferred dark and cold. But if you say that the light can not forestall the darkness, then we have much to fear. Kami be praised that you were sent to us in our time of need."

Kagome could not tell these people how mistaken they were, but they would learn with time. "Kami be praised," she repeated.

"We had called upon the lord of the land to give us aid. So many here are desperate. But it would seem that he has fled in the face of this onslaught of darkness just like all the others. Now we are left to fend for ourselves."

Kagome felt her interest piqued, "The shogun left?"

"So it would seem. Abandoned his people, he did. Leaving us to fend for ourselves."

"That is unfortunate. This shogunate held land here?" She asked.

"Most certainly! A vast estate that was left vacant. Now we are at the mercy of any fool who may attempt to occupy our land and impose new taxes on our village."

"How strange for a shogun to leave a perfectly good estate," she speculated. "I've never heard of such a thing happening."

"Strange indeed! A small green man has also been sighted near the grounds, haunting the place with his evil spirit. Likely the reason a shogun would risk death and leave, I say."

"Hmm. Perhaps I should visit this place and defeat the spirit to give your people peace," Kagome suggested with a knowing smile.

"Nay, priestess! You should not risk yourself so!"

"There is no risk," Kagome assured with relieved certainty.

She rested for the night at the family's home, content to start the day anew and find her way to the palace that lay only a few miles away.

The next morning, Kagome roused and was wished well on her journey. She gained directions to the estate and made her way with the little Rei by her side. He trotted along with ease, having a full belly from the doting family the previous evening.

o - o - o - o - o

He knew she was near. He had picked up her scent from an easterly wind. Now was time to make final preparations.

Sesshomaru had spent the past few days avoiding his mother's presence. The woman had invited herself to stay at such an inconvenient time in his life. Thankfully, she had not tried to eat the little one as he first assumed she might. His disdain for humans had not come from his father, after all.

It was an odd sight to witness his cold and vain mother as a doting anything. Even had he brought to the demoness an heir she may consider suitable, Sesshomaru had assumed she would have been indifferent to the child. That would have been a best-case scenario. The real events as they unfolded were completely different than expected.

His mother had the child, Setsuna, now, and he had instructed her to keep away for the time being. His mother had given him a toothy smirk while she held her granddaughter close.

"Oh, my son is attempting to lure his first human to him. What a proud mother I am," she teased.

Whether she was being facetious or contemptuous, he did not know nor did he care to discern as long as she knew her place in the matter.

The sum had not yet reached its zenith before the miko arrived, swathed in the sun's glory at her back, and announcing her glorious arrival. A small smile that would typically be out of place on his lips was the only physical tell of the satisfaction he felt.

The miko had arrived. To reclaim their child likely, as the woman had a vastly different style of parenting than his own mother, who preferred a more hands-off approach. But, he could not sense rage within her, so he knew that the child was not the only reason she had come.

She passed through the gates hesitantly, looking around as she walked. The miko must have known she was in the right place, but he could sense her trepidations.

Sesshomaru had patience aplenty, but he was done waiting. He strode towards the woman with purpose and a curious burning sensation within his chest, naught like he had ever felt before. When she saw him, she stopped, her hands trembling at her sides. She chewed her bottom lip and looked at him anxiously.

So many thoughts ran through his head. Things he wanted to do to her, but not yet. Sesshomaru stopped several feet away from her, putting the power in her hands. She had a choice to make. Close the distance or not.

He was long-lived, and time ran at a different pace for him. Years could pass in the blink of an eye, so minutes and seconds had never been of any consequence. Yet, now that she stood there for what seemed countless seconds felt to be an eternity.

"What have you decided then?" he asked.

Her mouth opened a bit as if she were to speak something, and instead, she chewed the bottom of her lip again in agonizing hesitation. Finally, she understood that it was her move.

He watched as she swallowed, and he could sense her heartbeat quicken though he could not tell if these things were from nerves or guilt. The woman took one tentative step forward and stopped.

How frustrating this game was. Fine. The woman had come this far, and he was feeling generous. Or impatient.

Sesshomaru moved towards her purposefully, closing that gap with long strides. Had the woman objected, she may have put up a fight, but that was not the case. Upon reaching her, he immediately wrapped an arm around her; the other hand tangled itself within her long, unbound hair to keep her in place. The woman placed her hands on his chest and sucked in a jagged, surprised breath. Though why she would have cause to be surprised was questionable.

He strove to be gentle, she was human after all, but his impatience caused him to claim her lips with haste. She seemed to possess an enthusiasm of her own, her lips parting to taste the sweep of his tongue as it delved into her mouth, savoring her.

The kiss lasted forever, but not long enough. He released her, and she let out a relieved sigh.

"I found you," she said with a smile.

"There was no hiding," he responded with a smirk of his own.

She pursed her lips, "It is not like I had directions, and there wasn't a sign out front." She looked back over her shoulder. "Thankfully, I had help."

"Help?" He questioned. He had seen no one. What type of help had she meant? Then he sensed it, tingling on his peripherals. His eyes honed in on the aura of a small nekomata and narrowed with distaste. Still, the creature was showing its deference by remaining far enough away to avoid immediate detection. The miko always did pick strange companions, himself not included.

The woman nodded but said no more. That was fine, Sesshomaru determined. So long as the help was not from his detested brother. Thankfully none of that ingrate's scent mingled with her own. He may have been tempted to pay a quick visit to the hanyou and give his respects as far as those were due.

"Where is she?"

Sesshomaru knew the question would come. "She is well taken care of, just beyond."

The woman allowed concern to creep into her features. "You mean your toad-I mean, Jaken is caring for her?" She quickly corrected herself.

He chuckled at her vacillation. "Jaken would never harm Setsuna."

"It's not his loyalty, I doubt, but his capability." She seemed somewhat dubious to the whole idea of Jaken caring for their daughter.

"Hnn. Indeed, the imp lacks finesse, and your reluctance is noted. Yet, it is not in his care that the child currently resides," he advised. He knew that this would cause the woman to become even further perplexed.

She pulled away and began to walk towards the castle, speaking as she walked. "Do you mean that you've hired a caretaker or something? Is it a yokai? Because I can't believe you would bring another human into your service, my presence notwithstanding."

It amused Sesshomaru to hear her speak so bluntly of herself. He followed her inside, content to do so. "You are correct to presume otherwise. Setsuna is currently with my mother." It was still rather annoying to think of the woman as a doting figure to any child. His childhood had been rather unpleasant; his mother preferring to take a more indirect approach to raise an heir.

The miko stopped dead in her tracks. She slowly turned around. "I must not have heard you right, Sesshomaru." The information must be challenging to process, for his words were precise and clear.

"The matter took this one by surprise as well." Sesshomaru knew he had an annoyed look about him. "The woman appeared quite suddenly and absconded with the child to 'play.'"

"Absconded? Play?" she tested the words. "Your mother is okay with Setsuna's...heritage?" she asked, seemingly uncertain of the appropriate word to use in the situation.

"Another surprising fact." He must undoubtedly admit so.

"I'm sorry. I guess I thought she might hate humans, because...you know…" She used a hand for emphasis.

He gave her a beseeched look. "You think this one and his mother hate humans?"

"Well, not you and not now." She smiled and shrugged.

"Hnn. What you see as hate is merely misguided superiority and a lack of compassion."

She continued to eye him with bemusement. "Judging on the things that played out from your father, I can't say you got those things from him."

"Indeed. Father was very different. Looking back, I held him in contempt for doing what he did. It was not until recently that I understood."

Now she was surely teasing him. "Oh? And what's that? What do you understand now that took you centuries to attain?"

"That humans can be admired for their tenacity."

"Tenacity?" She again was amused by his choice, her inflection raised and humorous.

Of all the traits to admire, he had chosen this one. "Among other things, miko."

She shook her head. "You can call me by my name now. And not miko or woman. I think we are beyond that. I hope we are beyond that." She allowed her words to soften at the end, her meaning open almost like a question.

"Perhaps you would prefer something a little more endearing?"

"Like honeycakes?"

He raised an eyebrow. Whatever 'honeycakes' may be, it would not be a term he would ever willingly use for her.

"It's a sweet treat. Couples often call each other sweet foods where I am from."

He scoffed at the suggestion. "Shall I be entreated to consume you then? To refer to another as edible would suggest that I do as much."

She smirked at him. "Maybe not honeycakes then."

Sesshomaru had already decided on an endearing word. It was something that had come to him unbidden before he had even allowed himself the idea of a future with her. The name had made him feel intensely uncomfortable in the beginning. He could not have ever fathomed feeling this way towards another person. Yet, here he was and no longer afraid of the feeling.

"This one would prefer, Beloved."

She seemed to glow a bright red, her eyes dewy with desire. Before she could respond, a voice disrupted them.

"How disgustingly sweet!" A woman's voice called out.

Sesshomaru sighed in annoyance. "Your timing is impeccable." The demoness, his mother, would choose this time to walk in.

"My dearest son. Have I not taught you the very meaning of discretion? To play with a mortal so openly. It is indecent." Her look was almost a sneer, hidden behind a half-smile.

He did not respond to her jab, merely choosing to give her a well-earned glare.

She waved her hand, dismissively. "Oh, calm yourselves. I mean no harm. I know you've inherited your father's...predilections. How delicious this girl is, my son. Quite a fine specimen."

The demoness stalked around like a huntress assessing its prey. Sesshomaru put an arm around the miko to display his authority. His mother seemed to be putting on a display of her own.

"Yes, a mighty fine specimen indeed. She will do well. If she survived bringing my granddaughter into this world, then she should be quite capable of handling the ceremony."

The miko's face blanched, and her eyes lowered. His mother caught the tiny display. "Oh, ho ho ho." Her eyes flitted from the woman to his swords sheathed at his side. She covered her mouth with the back of her hand while she chuckled. "The little one did not survive, did she?"

The miko now looked full of defiance but battled with herself to maintain a semblance of respectful decorum. Sesshomaru knew the miko bit her tongue only because she did not want to displease him.

"That is none of your concern. You will do well not to question my decisions regarding the matter. Otherwise, your welcome may run short."

"I would never question my darling child's decisions! You have become one of the most powerful daiyokai, my son. Even surpassing your most esteemed father. I have the utmost trust in you. It is only your...woman...that my concern is for."

The miko followed in Sesshomaru's lead. "I am capable of handling myself, honorable mother."

The demoness cocked her head to the side. "Hmm, so it would seem for you to garner the attention of my one and only son, for whom I care about greatly."

"I care for him as well," Kagome stated defiantly. Her back was straight, and her chin held up with an air of transcendence.

The demoness cocked her head to the side and put a thoughtful hand to her chin. "I would hope so. A mortal should not take the affection of a daiyokai lightly. They tend to be rather possessive until they grow tired of you. But I would not imagine for that to be such a problem for a girl such as yourself who has many, many years of youthful beauty left to her."

The miko seemed to regress into herself at having that fact pointed out. Sesshomaru could sense her hesitation now and turned a pointed glare to the woman who was his mother, a conniving woman who only ever served her own best interests.

"Where is Setsuna?" he demanded. There had been enough torment to his woman, and only so much he could tolerate from his mother.

The demoness smiled, "Why, I've left her with the toad. He seemed touched that I would honor him with that responsibility. I wanted the opportunity to meet the woman my son holds in such high regard."

Done with this charade, he ended things. "You have met, now stand aside."

"Very well."

The demoness moved aside, but not without making a show of it, giving a mocking curtsey. He would deal with her insolence later, mother or no.

Sesshomaru led to where their child had been left in Jaken's care. Seeing the child would allow Kagome to forget the earlier encounter. He told her to pay his mother no mind. She was but a woman scorned displacing her anger on the next best thing.

When they arrived in the area where Setsuna had been left, they saw the small imp run around anxiously trying to keep up with the little girl who had recently gained use of her legs. Sesshomaru felt pride at the leaps and bounds of her development, but the miko gasped, displaying astonishment.

"Setsuna?" She whispered. Her hands covered her mouth in surprise, and Sesshomaru knew that she hid a slackened jaw. The miko seemed to displace the apprehension quickly and ran towards her daughter to snag her up and cry tears of joy. "My baby," she sobbed. The girl smiled in recognition and allowed her mother to squeeze her. "So big. You've grown so big." The girl smiled a toothy grin, revealing several new teeth.

Sesshomaru stepped closer, placing a hand on the miko's shoulder. "You seem surprised."

"I'm afraid…" she stuttered and buried her face in the child's neck.

"There is nothing to fear." He pulled her close, enveloping the small pair in his arms.

She accepted the embrace for a moment but pulled away to sit the child on the ground. Setsuna immediately began to walk over to Jaken, who shrieked at the attention.

Kagome seemed petrified and on the verge of tears. Clearly, the sight of the girl brought up some trauma, from what Sesshomaru did not yet know. "The onibaba…" she uttered. "She placed an aging spell on...us...her...I don't know. She is so big. I can hardly believe she's the same child."

Sesshomaru felt his hackles rise at the mention of the witch. The oni who had ultimately led the miko and child to their deaths. Had he not been near to revive them with Tensaiga, well, he could not bear to think of it.

He had never thought what the witch had done to them, but he was not concerned now about the physical effects. No, now the only residual damage would be elsewhere, as displayed by this displaced fear.

"Setsuna is growing at a pace to be expected of a child of mixed heritage. A yokai child would have been able to defend itself by now, whereas ours is not there yet."

Kagome watched the child run around with a newly mastered gait. She took in a staggering breath, trying to process her new reality. "So, she will become an adult in a matter of months?"

"No." His word was assuring and soothing. "Her development will taper within a few months. There is no cause for worry here. The onibaba and her spellcraft are gone from this world."

Kagome sighed with relief, seeming lighter than before. A heavy load lifted from her shoulders. "Hmm," she said softly. Yet, there was still hesitation about her spirit. Likely from the twisted words, his mother had uttered, but he would rectify things soon.

Setsuna laughed loudly as she ran after Jaken, delighting in a game of hide and seek. Even though it was clear Jaken was genuinely attempting to hide. The imp pleaded with the child to let him be and to go and play with her parents, who were gracious enough to be present. Sesshomaru gave the miko ample opportunity to play and spend time with the child, allowing his retainer to escape. It was a relaxing and wondrous experience to behold. He had not realized the joy gained from the simplicity of it all. It was something his now-grown ward Rin had first shown him.

The evening had crept upon them suddenly. The sounds of crickets began to fill the air when talk and laughter were not drowning it out. Sesshomaru called for the child, and she instantly and obediently clambered over to him.

She looked up at him, her dark eyes gleaming and full of innocent happiness. The miko watched on from her spot on the floor where she had been playing with the girl.

Sesshomaru reached down and picked the small child up with one arm, and Setsuna instantly became quiet. She instinctively knew when it was time to settle, which was good. He called out for Jaken, who hesitantly appeared before his master after a matter of seconds of being summoned.

"My lord, all is ready," the imp stated. Jaken eyed the miko in hesitation but said nothing untoward. Sesshomaru had pressed Jaken into compliance and warned him of what should happen if he were displeased. It was known that Jaken had adopted Sesshomaru's contempt for those deemed lesser, but the toad had not also followed down the same path to compassion and empathy. Thankfully, his retainer's loyalty demanded tolerance and subservience. Jaken would have nothing foul to say to the miko.

"Hnn. Attend Setsuna," he commanded.

Jaken gave a bewildered look to his master and mumbled. "Of course, my Lord."

The miko stood and came towards her child, tenderly kissing her head. "Are we going somewhere?" she asked.

"To eat. You must be famished."

"I guess so."

He led her through the hall to a grand dining area lined with tatami mats and a low table with ornate, zaisu-backed cushions arranged around. Sesshomaru had no reason to utilize this room and had only visited on one occasion to inspect its suitability, but he was pleased with the layout and hoped the miko would, too. She was not one to be impressed by grandeur, another trait which he admired in her.

The meal laid out was also a simple spread which he'd prepared himself not long ago. Even though he, himself, did not partake in human delicacies did not mean he was inept at its preparation.

The miko looked at the food, and her insides made a loud gurgling sound, indicating her hunger. She laughed nervously. "It all looks great, but there's only one place setting." Hungrily eyeing the food, she glanced up. "Were you not going to eat? I'd feel silly eating in front of you alone."

Sesshomaru grabbed the miko by the wrist, keeping her in place. She did not try to escape but looked up at him. He gently grabbed her chin. "Never be embarrassed about anything that you are or what your body may require. Should this one be embarrassed to sustain himself in front of you?"

The miko looked perplexed. She seemed to ponder on his words. "I've never known you to eat, and I honestly assumed that maybe...you didn't eat at all."

He smirked at her suggestion. "Even the gods require food, and while I have had aspirations to be God-like in the past, I am not so dense as to believe I am one. No," he assured her, "while I can go long periods without eating, I do so on occasion. I may be hoping to have a meal tonight."

The Miko's cheeks glowed red at the insinuation, and she chewed on her bottom lip before her middle erupted in another loud protest.

Before she could say anymore, Sesshomaru led her to sit at the table. He helped her lower down onto the cushion and then sat beside her. She eyed the spread and was about to help herself before he stopped her.

"Kagome," he said, causing her to look up in alarm. His rare use of her name would need to become more habitual, he told himself. To refer to this woman so casually was undeserved. "Before you partake, you must know that I have prepared this meal myself."

She smiled and looked at the plate again. The meal was simple, a fillet of fish was the main course, and it steamed deliciously before her. There were other accompaniments, but the main course was the most lavish of the simple display.

"You prepared this? Then I am certain it will be exquisite. I am learning more and more about you. I should not be surprised. It's not as if Rin ate yokai while in your care." She laughed melodiously.

"Indeed. You have traveled here, and, by doing so, have accepted my request to be mine. Now, I extend another request to you." Sesshomaru sat straight and watched her eyes, hoping to glean any reaction from those dark orbs. "By accepting this meal, I have caught and prepared with my own hands, you will accept life with me as my companion, as my mate, for the remainder of your life."

The weight of his words seemed to settle upon her and brought to the front her insecurities over the vast differences in their life spans.

Her hesitation was marked, but he knew it was not due to her lack of desire for him. She battled with herself. "Sesshomaru...I…"

He stopped her and moved to kneel before her, their eyes level. Taking up her hands, he wove words to assuage her fears. "Kagome, I promise that by accepting my request, I will protect you and our child and any future children we may have with my life. I promise to dote upon you for as long as your mortal years grant you."

She started to chew on her lip again. The implications of a mortal life spent with a nearly ageless yokai were weighing upon her. "The years are not kind to humans, Sesshomaru. Will you still want me when I am old and wrinkly?" She added on for effect, "When I resemble Kaede?"

"Indeed, this one would."

She gave a small derisive laugh. "Forgive me for being a little cynical, Sesshomaru. You are so virile and handsome, and that won't fade...but what you see in me will."

Staring into her eyes, they looked almost dewy with unshed tears, making them appear bright. "Foolish woman. The fiery spirit you possess. The audacity you have when you challenge this one. The selfless love you have for all. This one is pleased you have chosen him to be a part of that."

She smiled but failed to look entirely convinced. Before she could say another word, he silenced her with a swift kiss. It was sudden, and she gasped in surprise but did nothing to stop it. Her lips were soft, abundant, and sweet. How he wanted to take those lips and put them to good use, but his hunger would need to be sated later. Still, he allowed himself to take pleasure in her now. As much as he wanted her, she wanted him, too. Sesshomaru could feel it with her intense desire to possess his mouth. He placed a hand on her shoulder and lightly pushed her away, not only to stop her but himself. Any more of this and he would succumb to his baser desires.

Her breaths dragged heavy, and her eyes remained closed, and he leaned to her ear to whisper. "Eat now, for you shall need your strength later, I promise you."

Her eyes flew open, and her cheeks glowed brightly with a pleasant red color. Sesshomaru moved to sit by the table and stared at her, thinking about that color and the places on her body he would explore to find what other areas flushed when excited. "Eat," he repeated.

Sesshomaru watched as she hesitantly began to dine on the meal, first choosing to sample at the entree he had prepared. Her nose scrunched up uniquely, and she chewed salaciously before swallowing. "This fish is delicious, Sesshomaru. It has a unique flavor, almost like some sort of saltwater fish, like sea bream?"

He smiled at her enjoyment and reiterated, "Eat, beloved."

o - o - o - o - o

After Kagome had finished eating her fill, she sat back, one part of her appetite sated. There was still much left over, and she hated seeing such a marvelous meal go to waste.

"Perhaps we can send the leftovers out to Rei? Or maybe even Setsuna would like the taste if she is eating solids?" she suggested.

Sesshomaru's eyes widened infinitesimally at the suggestion, indicating some hesitation. "Setsuna will have already eaten, and I will not allow a nekomata to dine on such a sumptuous dish. Other arrangements shall be made for your...pet," he said, choosing his words carefully.

Kagome shrugged the strangeness of it all off and smiled coquettishly at him. "I am ready for dessert now," she told him boldly.

He wasted no time in clearing the low table with a sweep of his arm, sending food and utensils clattering to the floor. His actions shocked Kagome, but her excitement diminished the shock. Sesshomaru was on her in a flash, pushing her back against the hard but smooth wood of the table. The discomfort was nothing to her as she felt the hard, wet kisses engulf her. This that she had been longing for so long.

She could feel the hard length of his engorged sex through the fabric of his clothes push against her thigh, followed by sensuous wetness seeping between her thighs. He was tender, at least trying to avoid piercing her flesh with his claws, but his lips were sure to leave bruises against her skin while he ministered to her exposed neck and chest.

Using his teeth, he loosened the fabric of her kosode and allowed her breasts free of their fabric confinement. She gasped and moaned beneath his touch and did her best to explore his body with fervent touches of her own. His jaw slackened when she grabbed hold of his hardened sex, staring into her eyes with golden desire. A groan escaped him, and he made quick work of his intricate clothing to allow her easy access to his member.

Kagome felt a little powerful as she explored the length of his male organ with her hand. Sesshomaru had stopped caressing her with his brutal, wet kisses to enjoy her touch on his most sensitive parts. He held himself aloft with one strong arm above her; the other hand was resting on her exposed breast in a mid grope. His eyes were shut, and the bridge of his nose scrunched as he panted while her hand ran up and down his thick shaft. Using a thumb, she ran it over the tip of his member's head to feel warm beads of fluid beginning to amass there. A peculiar thought formed in her head and led to the sudden desire to taste it.

Even as steadfast and immovable as Sesshomaru made himself out to be, pushing him onto his back was easy work. His eyes were now narrowed with pleasure as he watched her lower her head down to him. Still holding his heavy cock, it throbbed in her grip, and she saw clearly now the bead of fluid at the tip. She used her tongue, deftly lapping it up and savoring the saltiness. Sesshomaru moaned at the sensation, and the sound encouraged her to take the entirety of his length into her mouth. She placed her lips over the head and took his member, sliding down until she could go no further without gagging and then going up.

A deep scratching noise was heard, and her eyes moved to see Sesshomaru's claws digging into the wood of the table, scoring it with marks of pleasure. She smiled inwardly at this accomplishment, flitting her eyes up to see Sesshomaru staring at her with a clenched jaw. He looked so exquisite, lying back with her over top of him and in power. Kagome continued to slide up and down his cock, ensuring the use of her tongue to elicit those wondrous moans she could hear from above. Her eyes closed as she worked until she heard the slam of a fist, and her head was lifted up and away.

Sesshomaru drew in a ragged breath and kissed her hard, pulling her up so that her own exposed sex was positioned above his hips. He roved down her neck, scoring marks on her throat with his fangs. The sensation was akin to pain but on a level all its own. Each nip sent a new sensation rippling through her. She was on fire, and with him so close to filling her void, Kagome was tantalized and maddened by the torment.

Yet there was a certain magic to their touches, kisses, and strokes. It was intoxicating and mesmerizing, a feeling she was not ready to yield. Pushing her breasts against his chest, she straddled his hips. His cock strained against her, throbbing erratically against her inner thigh as they continued to explore each other.

Finally, after all the relishment had been sated, they could take no more. Kagome was not sure who gave in first to their bodies' desire to be connected. Perhaps it was by mutual consent, though her gasps and his groans suggested differently. Sesshomaru grabbed her hip, aligning his member with her soft nether lips and plunged into her, filling her.

Their cries intermingled at the pleasure and intensity of the sensation. Kagome could sense his need to thrust into her with wild abandon as if he had long been denied this passion. His hands gripped tightly around her hips, forcing them up and down at a pace she could barely keep up with. But here, she was in control, doing her best to match him.

Her breaths came quick and unchecked, but her need for release could not be ignored, and it would not be denied. Neither would the man below her, who allowed her this control. Her hips snapped, and his rose up to meet hers, his hands guiding her up and down his length. She knew she was close, so close, and she panted heavily. At last, she pushed off his chest, throwing her head back, her hair falling in waves down her back as she cried out her relief. He had been waiting for this moment with sublime patience and pushed her hips up and down one last final time, filling her with hot fluids and a wild cry of his own. Quickly, she fell forward to his chest, gasping until his lips found her own.

The kisses were now soft and gentle, but in her exhaustion, she barely noticed as he lifted her and moved to another room with a more appropriate setting for their activities.

Through a more subtle exploration of his body, she began to suck at his skin, focusing on a particularly tender area near his jaw. At the same time, he casually twirled her raven hair through his fingers, delighting in their quiet intimacy. Emboldened once again, she began to bite playfully with her teeth, and yet she could feel him hard again, his sex pushing against her.

He rolled over on top of her, resting his weight on his elbows, and his silver hair poured over his shoulders. Kagome smiled and ran her hand through it once before alighting her touch on his face. They stared at each other a moment, delving into the wells of each other's eyes before he leaned down to kiss her. The mutual kiss was tender and divine and deepened into something more.

Kagome was filled with renewed energy, and there was the unfulfilled need again, building within her and begging for release. She could feel Sesshomaru thick, ready, and waiting between her legs. He seemed to be waiting on her assent, which she gave with a quick nod of her head before he pushed into her with a slow, deliberate thrust. Once her own sex was full, she moaned aloud. The sound incited him, and he worked her, moving back and forth in a steady motion. On the precipice yet, again, she threw her arms around his neck, drawing him closer. "Sesshomaru!" she cried. He pumped his release into her with a low growl while her wet sex throbbed as the eddies of her climax ebbed deliciously away.

Twice more, they made love before finally lying still in one another's arms while the sounds of chirping insects and the warbling of nocturnal birds played in concert outside the paneled window.

The night was theirs, and the next day would be claimed as well, finally content to enjoy life for the moment as it was brought to them.

o - o - o - o - o

The end...

...Just kidding... 

[shitty-tf2-headcanons]

Standard fluff question but mercs reacting to their lover telling them theyre gonna be parents?

Scout-

What?! You serious!? He’s gotta tell everybody!! Tell’s his ma, his 7 brothers, the entire team, Miss Pauling, the Administrator, Saxton Hale, Bidwell, Merasmus, etc. Everybody and their fish is gonna know you’re pregnant and expecting. Thanks Scout. 

Promises to be the best damn father there ever was! But he doesn’t know how to be one. So how does he learn? Asks his ma! Seeing as she was the only consistent parent in his life, it only feels right to talk to her about child raising. She tells him everything she knows from raising him and his brothers, all on her own, of course. He hangs onto her every word. He even takes notes.

Having any pregnancy cravings? This boy is sprinting to the store and buying damn near everything in there! Feet hurt? Lay back and let the massage master work his magic! Want some cuddles? He’s already holding you. This boy has got you covered!

Soldier-

You mean to tell him there’s going to be a little solider running around here soon? That’s wonderful! He’s been wanting to train a new recruit! Announces to the team that there will be a new soldier joining their ranks with a big stupid grin on his face. 

Already planning out how he’s gonna turn your kid into a skilled soldier. First, they must have a sensible haircut. Second, he must tell them the story and war strategy of Sun Tzu. Third, he shall introduce your kid to his heads outside. Fourth, he will blah blah blah blah...just be warned that Soldier will someday teach your kid the glory of fighting naked while covered in honey.

Wants to immediately start looking at baby names. You already know this man is gonna wanna name your kid something like America or Liberty. If you’re cool with those names, then go right ahead. But if no, then suggest a name you like and just say it’s patriotic or American. He’ll believes you. Still insists that your kids middle name be something like America.

Pyro-

Baby...they’re gonna be a parent? R-Really?? You just made them the happiest pyromaniac around! Will burst into tears under their mask and is going to tackle you into a hug. They’re so happy!! Not even pyrovision could make them feel this good! Everyone on the team can just feel the happiness radiating off of them.

They already know they’ll love their baby unconditionally but what if the baby is scared of them? They look like a monster in and out of the suit...so they decided to ditch the suit for a while and just wrap their entire body in bandages. Their lover tells them they look silly and they should just show the baby how they really look. From then, Pyro actually stops wearing his suit and mask when off the battlefield

Pyro wants to decorate the nursery with you. So that means painting Pyroland scenery on the walls and building a crib. Pyro also leaves all their stuffies in the nursery (even Balloonicorn) for their baby when they’re finally born.

Demo-

THE DEGROOT CLAN SHALL PREVAIL!!! THE NEXT GENERATION OF DEGROOT’S WILL BE EVEN STRONGER!! Ahem, yeah Demo is pretty happy when he learns the news. Before you know it, every member of the DeGroot clan knows about the pregnancy and is sending the both of you care packages. The care packages are mostly full of bombs and fireworks.

DeGroot clan tradition demands that the parents abandon their kid and only reclaim them when they learn their true bombing potential. Tradition also demands they lose both their eyes. Demo will understand if you are rightfully horrified by these traditions. He is too. So he just says to hell with tradition! He’s never gonna abandon his kid and make them go through what he did! And it’s their choice if they want to lose their eyes or not! He rather you and your kid be happy than make sure some dumb tradition is followed.

Doesn’t drink as much anymore when he learns you’re pregnant. He doesn’t want to give you’re pregnant self a harder time by being black out drunk all the time. He’s also doing it for the baby. He wants his kid to think of him as some fun bomb throwing dad, not a fun bomb throwing drunk dad.

Heavy-

You’re...having a baby? This...this is the best news he’s heard in a while! Is going to pull you into a bear hug and spin you around while laughing jovially, tears are beginning to prick into his eyes. Will carry you all the way to med bay just so he could tell his favorite doctor the good news. He’s carrying you to every team member and telling them the good news too. Not long after he’s gonna call his mom and sisters and tell them the good news. He’s all smiles for weeks after you tell him.

Becomes 10x more caring. Will have Medic check you daily to see if everything is okay. Will do tons of research on what you’re not supposed to do during pregnancy and will make sure you don’t do any of those things. This man will carry everywhere you need to go, can’t have you straining yourself now, can we? Makes sure you and the baby are as comfy as possible.

Along with becoming more caring, he also becomes a lot more protective. No one except Medic (even then Medic’s only allowed to get up close and personal when doing your check ups) is allowed anywhere near you. Heavy becomes something of a personal bodyguard. Will glare angrily at anyone who gets too close to you. Will also not hesitate to throw somebody across the room if they do manage to get close. Eventually everybody learns to stay out of your way. They also realize they shouldn’t do anything reckless or dangerous in front of you in fear of incurring Heavy’s wrath. 

Engineer-

His honeybee is pregnant?! Yeehaw!! This calls for a celebration! This boy is gonna throw a whole ass party with the team and just cook an entire feast for everyone. Spends the entire time insisting that you eat enough for two and making sure you’re having a good time. Never fails to remind everyone that you’re pregnant, eventually Demo and Sniper make it into a drinking: every time the word “pregnant” comes out of Engie’s mouth, they take a shot.

Dad mode overload. Engie’s days are now spent just tending to you. He’s going to be cooking you your favorite breakfast and dinner everyday from then on. Full body massages are going to become a lot more common. Will fluff your pillows to their most fluffiest state and make sure your bed is as comfy as possible. Cleans up any mess you make with no hesitation. You’d think he would be tired from all this extra work but no. He’s just as energized and motivated as ever. 

Just like Pyro, he wants to build a nursery with you. He’ll leave the painting and decorating to you while he starts building the crib and every other piece of furniture needed for a nursery. Will also not hesitate to build his own toys for your baby to play with when their born.

Medic-

You both kinda find out at the same time actually. He’s doing your monthly check up when he finds out you’re pregnant. Then he tells you and it just kinda spirals from there. He’s all smiles and cheers when you both tell the team but that all but disappears when the two of you are alone that night. He never imagined he would be a father...isn’t he too old anyway? Those thoughts quickly leave when he realizes how excited you are. Maybe having a baby with you, the love of his life, won’t be too bad after all. Plus the thought of having a little apprentice gets him all giddy.

Just like Heavy, you’re gonna have daily check ups from then on. As your doctor and lover, he has to make sure you and your child is at peak health. Will get snappy if you try to skip an appointment. Will also have a panic attack if he sees something even slightly wrong with you or the baby. Even his doves look a little stressed. So it kinda becomes the patient’s job to calm the doctor down.

Will have his doves on guard duty. Whenever he’s not around you, one of his doves (mostly Archimedes) will stick with you and keep a close eye on you. In the event that something does happen to you, his dove will report back to him and squawk at him. That’s Medics cue to drop everything and attend to you. 

Sniper-

Not gonna lie, this man is gonna faint when you tell him. Believe him when he says he’s overjoyed, but he’s scared out of his mind. He’s not fit to be a dad!! He pisses in jars and throws it at people!! He shoots people for a living!! HE LIVES IN A VAN!!! What kind of normal dad does that?!? Snipes is gonna cling to you even more and ask for constant reassurances. He doesn’t want to screw this whole dad thing up...

Will ask Engie to help renovate his van so there’s more room for you and the baby, in the end it kind of resembles a trailer. Fully intends on traveling to places with you and the baby. Witnessing the world’s many wonders with the two of you will only make those moments that much sweeter.

Just like the other guys, he wants you to be as comfy as possible. So that means knitting a couple blankets and sweaters for you if you ever get cold. Will also do the same thing for the baby, he’ll even try to make little booties for them too!

Spy-

excuse me what the fuck??? Doesn’t faint like Sniper but gets very pale and sweaty. Oh god this can’t be happening again...once was already enough. Seriously plans on running away, he’s already trying to fake his death, when it dawns on him: Scout turned out to be disaster. He wasn’t there for Scout...so there’s a chance of your kid turning into a Scout 2.0...no...he won’t allow that to happen. Spy promises to stay and raise your kid right. He refuses to make the same mistake again.

You think he’ll allow you and your child to live on the base? Ha, don’t make him laugh! Being the extra bitch he is, he is going to buy you a whole ass house and it’s all yours. Fully decorated and everything of course. Being the shitty good expecting father like he is, he’ll spend a lot of his time there with you. It starts to feel like home after a while.

When you’re sleeping, he’ll just hold you and stroke your belly. He’s scared. He knows almost nothing about being a real father. It would be so easy to run away. But...he can’t. He loves you far too much to abandon you both now. Most nights are spent like this during the pregnancy.

Miss Pauling-

Aw crap, how is she gonna work and be pregnant at the same time? She’s always wanted kids but why did she have to get pregnant when she’s working a job that only allows her 1 day off a year. She’ll try to hide her pregnancy and keep working. But the Administrator knows everything and just tells her to go home for as long she needs. In return, she just asks that you take over for Pauling. Pauling will still insist on helping you with your new job.

Pauling is going to be feeling a little down now that she’s basically jobless and forced to try to relax for months. Just read gun catalogs to her and give her hot chocolate and she’ll feel a little better. Though being with you does improve her spirits greatly.

Is gonna wanna spruce up her apartment and bit and make some more room for the baby. So that means buying new furniture and painting the walls purple. With all the purple, you have a feeling your kid is gonna be conditioned to like the color. Just don’t mention this to Pauling cause she will chase you down and insist on painting you purple too.