#and ppl are always like oh but I'd feel so bad doing that. why! the universe owes it to me anyway

[lonesomedotmp3]

I LOVEEEEEE abusing my mentally ill status against my university I love it I am the one all the tories are afraid of I'm the one gaming the system all because I have terminal sad scared disorder

[lilowoof]

ngl gamers, I think I'm gonna inevitably lose to the hormones and depression in the near future XD

Can't bring myself to be active cause I'm using a lot of energy to not vent post all the time. But fuck it, into the tags I go!

[dimiclaudeblaigan]

this is a very venty post don't mind me :D

that nintendo direct was so horrible.

it was literally like 80 percent remakes and remasters.

never in my life have i seen an announcement video exist just to say "every game you've ever known since the 90s is being remade/remastered, sorry, we ran out of originality".

literally like all the video game market is anymore is remakes and the movie industry is just as bad.

the nso releases are fine because they're not like, remakes taking up full game slots. they're old games that are being made accessible and that's great... but there's no need to remake this many games when they can do that. remakes used to be rare. remember stuff like the wii u shop and stuff? with all the games they had on those things? now it's a tiny selection and everything else is a remake :/

also I feel like a lot of new rpgs are just like... lowkey fe knockoffs now instead of original rpgs.

i'm happy for like... two existing remakes, but one of them is mario rpg which people wanted waaaaAAAAAYYYY before the remake and remaster era, and the other is baten kaitos which im not actually happy about remaster-wise (the updated ui is trash, they took out very specific charms of the original ui), just happy that it will get more recognition/notice from people since it was never popular.

they also completely removed the english voice acting which like okay yeah it wasn't always that great but the voices fit perfectly and it wasn't as bad as fans meme on it for! it just sounded like they were talking through a tube and that was actually the worst part of it lol.

someone suggested to me that they may have just lost the data for it, but idk. i wish they'd just admit that somehow if it was the case, because it bugs me that the english audio is just completely gone when ultimately i really liked it. i wanted the game to be accessible to newer players, sure, but i also wanted the english audio there. ig that's because i grew up with it and i liked it, but it's still such a bummer for me!

paper mario being put on the nso and tyd getting a whole remaster does make me sad tho bc it feels like they're leaving the original in the dust when it was so good. if you're gonna do tyd, at least do them both.

good for innersloth though, i'm sure they never imagined being on a nintendo direct. they're the real winners here.

[isekyaaa]

If you don't know me well and you've heard my opinions abt people talking shit, I probably seem like the person that enjoys talking shit about others. To which the truth of the matter is that I don't. Tbh, I feel I do something worse. When I talk about a person to someone else, I break them down from the bottom up by analyzing what makes them so irritating, but also what makes them so great, and I share that analysis with the person I'm talking to. It quickly escalates to bringing up a person's personal issues, traumas, insecurities, etc, and analyzing them under a lens.

[simpjaes]

in ur opinion who in enha is the biggest perv like the mf is so dirty minded to the point where he probably feels shame for it but can’t help himself when his mind wanders and he has to sneak off to thr nearest bathroom to get himself off because of u

MTL: hyung line + being a shameful perv

tags: this is kind of just general personality stuff, when it comes to "girls" just assume you are the girl in question.

most

★ sunghoon: be honest, you saw it coming right? sunghoon is definitely a pervert but probably cares a lot about who knows it and/or who he wants to keep that from. so on the days where it gets like....real bad....where he wants you so bad, but he knows he can't have you or something, he's running off to find somewhere, fucking anywhere to be alone so he can relieve the stress. otherwise? he won't be able to look you in the eye without saying something inappropriate or losing his mind over how hot you look in that fuckin' top. the type to slam you against the front door and start grinding the second yall step inside because he cant contain his cock and also, he wasn't allowed to say shit about it bc ur ass brought him to see your family at like...a church event or something idk

☆ jake: super perv and super bad at hiding it. also super ashamed when literally everyone sees it. i'm talking like, college parties getting to dance with you and trying to finger you on the couch type perverted. he isn't always in his right mind, either pussy drunk or feeling the intense need to be pussy drunk and no in-between. super ashamed of it though, because what's more embarrassing than walking around a college party with a boner? idk...maybe cumming in your pants because you grinded on him a bit too perfectly during that last song :/?? yeah, that might be worse. (he went home with tears in his eyes) disclaimer: jake would only be ashamed if anyone other than his girl saw him be so pathetic. he low key gets off on the embarrassment tho

★ jay: blatant pervert. the one who seems more down to earth and chill but also the one slapping your ass or staring right at your tits like "what i'd do to get my dick between those rn....."

probably struggles to get girls sometimes because of it ngl, but he has no shame about it either way. and man, when he does get between a girl's legs? everybody gonna hear about it. he might censor the name of the girl but he's doing a full show and tell otherwise. bro probably always begs to record his antics too. (he wants the praise and validation)

☆ heeseung: pervert to the max. worse than anyone and everyone. he isn't ashamed of it only because he's good at hiding it from the ppl who don't need to know. like this man would not give a fuck if he got caught slipping a hand up a skirt or eye fucking someone's sister tho (lmao), you're gonna know what he wants and he's not gonna mince words about it with you or anyone else.

what's that? you're dating jake? oh well why does that matter? Heeseung is still gonna let you know that you should think he's hot and if you want some of that dick, you know where to find him. he wants to be everyone's booty call and is an absolute simp and slut and all things in-between.

least

[buntanteen]

svt fic recs list <3 - yjh, hjs & lee chan - sfw ver. 2

reader insert fics!! though, lots of these are ot13 writings, i am specifically recommending the jeonghan, joshua and dino sections!

✩ svt writing & fic rec masterlist ✩

note: trying to find pics where all three of them match in aesthetics is soooo much harder than i thought lmao. future rec lists might not picture all three members :,)

✩ yoon jeonghan ✩

❥ voicemails yoon jeonghan leaves you while he’s on tour - @babyleostuff

i love this concept soooo muchh

ofccc he'd be mopey and missing his s/o :((

voicemail #10?? bro, i just reached my 20s and my knees were cracking bEFORE then...

❥ love languages: yoon jeonghan - @cxffecoupx

words of affirmation??? hannie knows how to comfort so well

rahhh quality time? I LOVE QUALITY TIME!

"small acts of violence" LMAO

✩ hong joshua ✩

❥ seventeen as boyfriends: joshua edition - @fairyhaos

joshua truly radiates this sweet bright youthful love that is filled with fun and silly moments

ahhhh that last part made me tear up :(( its not always the activity that is fun, but the person/people that you are with :(((

❥ BOYFRIEND JOSHUA WHO… - @mangocustard16

pls make sure i drink water....i do not drink enough...

i used to like, not care for people serenading me until suga and joshua appeared in my life u don't have.

this dude is like, one of the ideal boyfriend types haha.

SHUT UP?? THE BUYING FLOWERS ON A TUESDAY BECAUSE THAT'S WHEN U MET STFU *cries into a pillow* THAT'S SO CUTE

✩ lee chan/dino ✩

❥ voicemails lee chan leaves you while he’s on tour - @babyleostuff

SHUT UP VOICEMAIL #5 IS SOOOOOOO CUTE DKFJNB

omg him leaving clothes for his s/o to wear :(((

i did a lil cackle at number 8 <3

oh number 9....baby...monopoly is ALWAYS an intense game

OH the last voicemail....stfu baby ofc i'd do that for you :((( WHY CAN I HEAR HIM SPEAKING SOFTLY HMPH :(( WHY AM I KINDA TEARING UP?

❥ seventeen as boyfriends: chan edition - @fairyhaos

oFC this lil guy is just filled with love and comfort and playfulness :((

hmmm idk chan....gose chan on my phone is pretttttty interesting

....LMAO THE "holding the world in my hands" I WOULD'VE JUST WALKED AWAY

✩ ot13 works (yjh, hjs & lee chan sections) ✩

❥ seventeen with an s/o who loves physical touch - @wheeboo

the lil jeonghan noises of approval would so help my overthinking mind. he just seems like such a fun partner to goof around a bit and feel so so soooo loved

the fucking ◠‿◠ shua smile actually obliterates me (i rewatched the first nana tour ep today and the amount of times he did his lil smile healed me so bad ahh) YES BACK HUGS GRRRR i'm a koala on his back

dino being competitive over affection??? BRO I WILL WINNN THIS >:(( just let me loooooovvveeeee youuuuuuus

❥ you saying another member's name in your sleep - @hannieehaee

sorrrryyyy jeonghannie but chan is cute too :((

NO I CAN IMAGINE THE PUPPY HEAD TILT WITH A QUESTION MARK FORMING ABOUT JOSH'S HEAD. YEET ME OFF A CLIFF SDFJKBV. i'm saying jeonghan's name cuz i like him too baby, sorry :(( yeahhh, take it up with hannie who didn't do anything heh

nAUR CHAN I'M SORRYYYY. mingyu is just my bestie, i like puppies :(( ur still one of my favs darling :((

❥ seventeen with a younger s/o - @wheeboo

forever being babied and teased by hannie yessssssssssssss hehehe *insert that blushing/bashful skunk from bambi gif* he's really a comforting person. when he spoke about being a rock/island for the members, he is SOOO that and i can very much so see him doing that for the people he loves

shuaaa. the idea of an older s/o that can take care of me? fuck yeah. but let me take care of you toooooo. (side note: i do not like when ppl older than me think i can't take care of them cuz i'm younger??? baby, i'm not tHAT much of a baby, hmph)

dinononononono "wow is that how you speak to your elder?" YES IT IS BRO WHADDAYA GOING TO DO IT ABOUT IT GRRRR >:((( but fr, the way he spoke to shua during the grape shirt/sticker going svt ep...i just know he'll use the power over a s/o (jokingly and lovingly ofc)

❥ svt when you call them a new pet name - @lovingseventeen

hannieee is soooooooo pretty boy hehe. pretty is my favourite visual adjective

joshua and reader having a pet name/term of endearment competition??? SIGN ME UP >:)

dino is jeonghan's and my baby~

✩ unit & lines works ✩

❥ comforting you after a bad day (vocal unit) - @gi4hao

how both shua and hannie handled reader's bad day is exactly how i need to be comforted after one :,) cuddles, venting, taking my mind off it with other activities & someone's presence is soooo nice!!

❥ dating seventeen (hyung line ver.) - @wqnwoos

no one escaping jeonghan's teasing ahhhhhhhhh. the leaning against reader?? i love when people initiate physical contact, it is sooo nice. the teasing and whining kjgfkjdb. taking care of and being taken care of?? i don't think i could ever ask jeonghan those s/o questions ppl ask because he'd take it so far and i'd just be like :| with the most concerned look on my face. being adored and having my face squished nyahhgfkdjb

joshieeee. flirting??? with me??? yes ames, this is a dating headcanon/drabble duh. WHEN I SAY I WOULD BE SO GENTLEMAN-LY BACK AT JOSH GRRRR LEMME OPEN UR DOOR FOR UUUU. yes baby, all the cheek kisses in the _world for u. YES LIL SPOON JOSHI AGENDA!!! THANK UUUU

❥ dating seventeen (maknae line ver.) - @wqnwoos

DINOOOOooooOOOOOOooOO :,) like, that's my baby. his enjoyment with being praised and MY enjoyement for giving praise works together beautifully muahhaha

mini message from me: thanks to y'all who have read this far and thank you for the notes on my last fic rec!! i hope your week went well and you were able to enjoy caratland!! did you do something to take care of yourself? ς(.-‿-)

ames' song recs: perriot that laughs at us by iu, dimple by bts, doughnut by twice, forg_tful (with kim sawol) by rm, slow dancing by v, ready to love by seventeen & who (acoustic remix) by jimin

taglist: no one yet, but if y'all would like to be on it, pls comment :))

[ca-suffit]

i haven’t read the books but from the way some book stans talk about lestat like he’s some saint, i was not expecting sam in that interview to be like no actually he loves being evil and he’s really good at it and all the stuff about male rage/akasha and the devil being like wow he’s so terrible i need to recruit him actually. and i’ve seen the odd comment on twitter that’s like oh poor sam for having to put up with this lestat character assassination. like i don’t wanna call ppl out but i saw someone say “he signed up for anne rice’s iwtv, not rolin jones’s iwtv 😢” like ??? no actually he did sign up for rolin’s adaptation. and then they act like he’s so put out by the changes like a) he’s getting paid to pay his favorite character i think he’s okay. and b) even if he has reservations or questions about a change or even outright disagrees with one, he’s always full of praise for the final product and for rolin in general. like girl he is fine lol. like he said, some changes needed to be made and were for the greater good e.g. wrt improving the louis character.

I forget if he clarified in the interview or not, but that bit he says about going to hell comes right from the books

But what had I done to Claudia? And when would I have to pay for that? How long was she content to be the mystery that bound Louis and me so tightly together, the muse of our moonlit hours, the one object of devotion common to us both? Was it inevitable that she who would never have a woman's form would strike out at the demon father who condemned her to the body of a little china doll? I should have listened to Marius's warning. I should have stopped for one moment to reflect on it as I stood on the edge of that grand and intoxicating experiment: to make a vampire of "the least of these." I should have taken a deep breath. But you know, it was like playing the violin for Akasha. I wanted to do it. I wanted to see what would happen, I mean, with a beautiful little girl like that! Oh, Lestat, you deserve everything that ever happened to you. You'd better not die. You might actually go to hell. But why was it that for purely selfish reasons, I didn't listen to some of the advice given me? Why didn't I learn from any of them-Gabrielle, Armand, Marius? But then, I never have listened to anyone, really. Somehow or other, I never can.

he's not a saint (but he wants to be one for a second lol) but I personally didn't feel like he was that "evil" either. anne rice wasn't rly a good writer and fired her editor 3 books in on top of it. the series was unplanned and it's a wreck. he does awful shit but nothing I'd view makes him rly "evil," so it was a struggle for me to get on board with all that. an internal fight about how he views himself, I could understand, but idk what was rly that bad otherwise. especially cuz she was so in luv with him that consequences for anything he does just drop off as the books go? let me not write a whole thing about this lol. but ya the good and evil thing is from the books. the rice-a-ronis do mention it in posts sometimes but ever since the show has aired, everything has to be explained away now, bcuz they don't like black and brown characters or fans judging their white fav. he's either an innocent meow meow or a gothic monster, depending what mood they're in that day to dodge whatever criticism comes for them.

AMC explores a lot of stories about violent men so I've never understood this insistence like it's going to be some soft romantic series. the romance is gonna exist in the violence somehow, especially cuz they're vampires. louis slamming dreamstat's head into a rock wall while being goaded to do it bcuz dreamstat says it's the only way louis knows how to luv is sort of peak loustat for where we're at rn. I'm sure eventually they'll be more tender but it's still gonna have gritty undertones for the network it's on and who is writing it. the stans luv to make it about gendered shit, like rolin is ruining it all bcuz he's a man, but anne rice wrote violent, fucked up things too. worse than the show is prbly going to go. it's all excuses. u can just not like something without having to justify ur dislike of it to death. like damn. it's not ur taste, just stop watching??

and yes sam is a grown ass man getting prbly a good paycheck from this so loll he will be fine!

[broodingheroine]

tmagp 9 thoughts

rolling with it........ idk transportation? hair rollers? I'm bad at guessing

pen scribbles :3

ONBOARDING PAPERWORK....... SAM STOP FILLING IT OUT WHAT ARE YOU DOING

refuse to give "it" the satisfaction of giving up. sam don't give it sentience.

IF ITS DELIBERATELY WEIRD DONT FILL IT OUT

negative emotions. no stop.

why zero to seven.

JUST WHY????

okay they're flirting now. not in front of my salad.

sam humming to himself lol

CHESTER

MAGNUS WHAT??????????????? STOP

"STATEMENT" FUCK OFFFFFF

artifact storage moment

haunted game sounds interesting though.

oooooo wait the dice are haunted........

it's giving the card game with death episode of tma

divination dice 👀

SCARS?

turning gambling into a horror story is so creative though.

nah I'd probably roll the dice to be honest with you

oh this dude was on the way to Becoming huh

oh this is definitely like the Death episode of tma

oh fuck not the snake eyes

lol end of that one final destination movie

INTERRUPTION?

DECLARED DEAD??????

first assignment

"I don't watch television" lena ur so hot

hm tv ppl.

TEDDY!!!

back in the crypt lmao

alice jealous moment???

teddy u sneak I love u

alice the lady doth protest too much

BIG FOOTS A GOOD LAY HAHAHAHA

NO. NO DO NOT GO. DO. NOT. GO.

SAM. SAMMMM NOOOOOO.

YOU HEARD A CASE FILE ABT A GUY GETTING HIS EYES PRESUMABLY RIPPED OUT AT THIS PLACE AND I DECIDE YEAHHHHH LETS FUCKING GOO[?????

alice. alice uve been adamantly against any kind of investigation this whole time and now ur just like. sure whatever??

I'm so stressed right now.

I have a bad feeling about allll of this.

so the mention of some big name TV guy is very reminiscent of web statements so I'm a little wary of that

I'm assuming that lena is blackmailing ppl? can't really think of a reason why some tv guy would actually be involved with anything Horrors related considering he'd be in the public eye pretty frequently.

unless he is and it's the guy who burned the hilltop charity shop down and the envelope is another job? but I doubt that

presumably lena is the one handing out "hits" now vs being handed them. maybe "killing" klaus is what got her the position?

I'm lowkey nervous abt teddy reappearing? what if it's true that you can quit but you always get drawn back? teddy is seemingly the only ex employee anyone has any contact with soooo

I LOVED the case file today. dice are cool as shit. wish I could remember the episode title of the tma ep with the card game to become death but alas.

also hey! even more evidence that fr3-d1 is listening instead of just recording. computer has sentience let's gooooo.

I don't want sam to go to the institute but also I really hope next ep we get to see the institute.

sam filling out the paperwork presumably for no reason 🤨 he's being compelled 🤨

overall I'm STRESSED right now

how are we doing folks

[icy-watch]

^^^^ me with Geo

So so so so so sooooooooooo

You've met GEO

My reasoning for loving him so much stems from Season 2 Part 1 so I can't fully explain

BUT

I can tell you some things that they show doesn't tell (I think):

Geo says that he's a Munch with the color of a Geckle but it's not true; he's half and half

If you didn't notice but only his left ear was pierced; a sign in the Gay community to other gays that you are gay back when being public about it was frowned upon

The man who wrote the episode "Land of Lost Things" and created Geo (I think he made the character) is gay himself! So in a way, Geo is a self-insert character

I am Aromantic. I just don't feel the need or want to have a romantic relationship. And that seems to have stepped over into the media I watch. I don't ship. I'm slightly romantic repulsed. I don't actively hate it, I just don't like it. I'm fine with canon ships like Jaya or Lumity (from Owl House (plz watch it)).

But something about Geo and Cole. Something about how they interact in Season 2 that just.........AUGHAUGHGHHAHG!!!!!!! It awoken something in me. I feel warm inside!!!! I found myself grinning ear to ear.

It could just be the fantastic writing, but it's so much more. The ship for Geo and Cole is called LostShipping and/or Geode. The fanbase kind of goes back and forth. I don't mind either.

I'm still aro, and I still cringe inside at most romance. But Geode is the one exception and the whole #savemyboycole thing is really dumb

Oh look, I did explain it all without spoiling lol

And yeah......there are ppl who are NOT happy about Geo and Cole. They're not even actually together yet some ppl on Twitter are pissy. They HAAAAATE Geo! It's stupid. First off, it's a lego. Second, it's a kids show. Calm down. It's not that bad/important. Some ppl see Cole as Gay (me) and others see him as straight. Both are fine. Both are cool. He's still the same guy.

Oh, and there's no minifig for Geo. I think it's bc of his hair. They don't have like a set piece of it or something.....eh....just make a plushie of him (and of Cole plzzzzzzzzzz) I'd buy 500 if they did honestly

And now that you've met him.....I am safe to change my pfp to GEO!!!!!!!! (I also LOVE his outfit so much!!!! I want it)

(I almost put in a pic of him in Season 2 and was like "Oops....back it up! Can't use that!")

Geo! A blorbo! He's such a bean!

I noticed something right off the bat with him looking like a Munce and a Geckle, so when he mentioned it, it kind of confirmed what I'd thought.

I totally remember the gay ear piercing thing! My cousin and uncle were double and triple checking when they got their ears pierced that they didn't get the wrong ear. And that was in the early 2000s. It's amazing what's changed in 20 years. (Note: this is not the cousin who got married in Malaysia last year. This is his older brother, the extreme goth who hosts the Halloween Birthday Party every year. The 1 where my sister pumped me up to do this.)

Oh! I love that little bit of trivia!

*gives you a virtual hug* I will always love my aro friendlies.

It's extremely rare to see a queer couple that is Comfortable and just Exists. With Geo and Cole, it feels natural and unforced. And I'm very glad for that. It's probably why shipping them feels... nice.

Idk, I'm rambling.

I'm guessing the #savemyboycole thing is connected to chriscreator0 somehow?

A characters sexuality or gender doesn't change who they are as a person, and I wish people who criticize media for including queer characters were more willing to understand that. Just bc something about them is revealed doesn't mean they still aren't the character that they liked.

Justice for Geo! We deserve an official minifig or plush of our pretty guy! I will shake my fist at LEGO until something is done for him.

[derangedanomaly]

Here we go again lol

(Couldn't find the link sryy)

21. "Mh, I don't rly like my hands I think?"

22. "Probably like- stamina and intelligence?"

23. "Well.. I do it myself? I think I would understand, but it depends on the lie honestly"

24. "I like the cold^^"

25. "... I don't like saying it honestly, but I like hearing it, and not saying it back is sooo rudeeee"

26. "... I hate doing it"

27. Just laughing

28. "... Yeah.. "

29. "Pretty high"

30. "Many things! I don't think I should name them tho, idk who's listening after all"

31. "Who the hell needs food anyways" <- isn't a messy eater tho

32. "Mh...I can tell you which one made me feel the most loved? ^^"

33. "Ohhh:D called it, every moment with Ace tbh lol"

34. "Touch. Because I like hugs, and when killing I like to feel the blood and organs"

35. "Mh, depends"

36. "Mh, if I won't get killed, I'd ask Nm abt passive,it's rly interesting to me, and I like Nm! ^^ and I like passive, well- the one I know abt at least"

37. ".... I would say the past, but I would change so much and wouldn't meet Ace.. So the future! ^^"

38. "..my parents, toriel and asgore? Prob also Chara and asri-.. Flowey."

39. ".. I'm used to being alone.. So alone I'd say"

40. "I'm afraid of many things honestly, like monsters, I also hate it when ppl are taller then me cuz it makes me feel vulnerable.. But rly fear?.. Uhm.. I always start panicking when chaos gets mad or sad in anyway... hes.. pretty unreadable in those moments.."

21. "I'm not very fond of my face...it brings back bad memories......"

22. "Probably strength and intelligence. I mean- I have a fucking PHD."

23. "..... Next question."

24. "I like the cold weather, for... obvious reasons.."

25. "Telling someone you adore that you love them is not hard.. I like saying it only to Kris. Everyone else can honestly just fuck off-"

26. "I do not try and search for help. It's too late for me to be honest. What else is there for someone that lost it all?"

"HEY! THAT'S MY FUCKING LINE-"

"SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU ZEST FEST-"

Seems like we have a small disturbance! Apologies.

27. "....... You're kidding. Right?" Of course he did lol.

28. "..I don't know. No one ever tried tickling me before. I mean... When you're in Nightmares realm, not many people go up to you and tickle you. Actually- let me rephrase that! No one ever comes up to me and tries to tickle me."

29. "I killed hundred upon hundred monsters, and humans. You really think that my pain tolerance would be low? Tch. Of course it's HIGH."

30. "Oh... I'd tell you.. but do you really think I would trust you enough to tell you?"

31. "The only messy eaters are Ted and Blade, not me."

32. "...." He's dead quiet...

33. ".....////" He's refusing to answer and avoids eye contact...

34. "Probably vision or hearing... I tend to rely on those senses the most.. heh.. why? Well wouldn't you like to know..."

35. "I don't try and make small talk. Why talk at all if you have nothing intelligent to say?"

36. "The only only that would be brutally honest is probably Nightmare... I mean- don't get me wrong! Chaos and Ted are honestly pretty blunt too. But they both sugar coat it... Uh... I don't know what I'd ask him though... Probably why he's so cruel. But he'd most likely avoid to answer this question."

37. "Realistically? The past.... Honestly? Future, so I could be finally dead-"

38. "Oh...well.... Probably the twins- I mean... Nightmare and Chaos.. but both had different effects. I like Chaos more.. I- have to admit that I'm a bit of a fan of his- Don't Tell him that though."

39. "I'd rather be alone... But I'm tied for life to the king.. Nightmare. So... I don't really have a choice. Do I?"

40. ".... Nightmare... But- I honestly fear Chaos more than Nightmare- for some unknown reason... Like- yeah, Chaos isn't the one pulling the strings! But I feel as though Chaos has a... Problem with his emotions at times..? May be because he's a clone, and doesn't really know about emotions.. I spend a week trying to decipher what exactly is going on with him, but I just- can't figure it out.."

[bluelolblue]

Hellooooo! Because I can’t stop thinking about that one gifset (you know the one): Santino bath headcanons? Does he like baths or showers? Warm or cold? What kind of scents would he want for his shampoos and what would he put in a bath in terms of oils, candles, things like that? And of course, what do he and John get up to in the bath or shower?? Thanks as always! 💖

OOH YESSS THIS SOUNDS SO FUNN

Thank you so much YAY! 💖 those gifs really are inspiring (and yes I can't stop thinking abt them too ahaha!)

Santino is a clean cutie patootie :]

Santino bath headcanons

I think he likes both baths and showers. And I'll explain why!

Baths are when he feels mentally bad. Taking a bath just relaxes him then, because the warm water is just all around him, over him, it feels so comforting. Like a warm blanket, for example!

He definitely uses different shampoos that smell like fruits; strawberry, papaya, pineapple, mango, peach, whatever else smells nice. Even coconut and vanilla scented shampoos, (he loves vanilla)

Pretty much those like essential oils that can help to relax, or just have an advantage for something. Lavender, peppermint, lemongrass... yk it helps with relaxing, lightens up your mood

I'd say warm baths are really comforting for him, it helps him to relax and get his mind off things. Oh, lots of bubbles ofc!

And he really just likes to be clean and smell like those shampoos

OH AND, I can imagine him also drinking coffee or like a cocktail or champagne while in the bathtub. It's also more relaxing like that

Sinking into the warm water, and everything smells so nice. That's just so beautiful, and he loves it

Showers! Well, that's something he does often, and it's usually a warm shower (gotta clean off blood or sweat or... something else off him yk)

He hates feeling "sticky" like when you're sweaty and just feel sticky? That kind of feeling. Not to mention, if he actually has dried blood on him, that's disgusting to him. And well... other thing that he likes, but hates when it gets messy yk yk 👀

Cold showers when he is not feeling okay but doesn't have enough time to make himself a bath. So he just pours cold water on himself, and it takes him some time to get used to it

He isn't very fond of it, he winces and is always tempted to stop it, but... considering his childhood, he is used to going through something he doesn't like. Perhaps this is a habit from his childhood

But yeah, he likes to have a nice warm bath and a shower. Keep himself clean and smelling good :)

Sexy time! Yes, he loves to relax with a bath, but he also enjoys and loves when John joins him. And that most of the time ends up with getting freaky

Yes, in the bathtub (you predicted the first chapter for the omegaverse fic with this one LMAOO)

Of course because it's Santino. Sexy time in a bathtub is definitely exciting and not something they can do every day, so he takes his chances

It's like even more relaxing to him then. Just being so overwhelmed, the warm water and John at the same time?? Perfect for relaxing

And they would sometimes have drinks together like that. I can imagine Santino being leaned against John while John is kinda hugging him from behind and they're sipping cocktails (bc I think having a cocktail or any other drink while taking a bath sounds very hot)

They'd usually have some nice smelling candles lighten up as well then. Just adds to the mood

Oh and yeah, definitely happened in the shower as well. That's just perfect ^ ^

Okay, to the less horny parts EHEH

They would often take showers together (I can imagine his shower is big enough for them two... yk rich ppl showers ahah)

Especially if he doesn't feel well and takes that cold shower, John either asks if he really wants a cold shower and wants to comfort him or just let's him take that cold shower but then also kinda guides him through it. Like, he talks to him, keeps him calm, and tells him if there's something he wants to talk about, he is always here for him

And those gifs... like imagine John being knelt next to the bathtub and caressing Santino's cheek and pouring some warm water over his shoulders because Santino is not doing well 💔 but then again ❤️‍🩹

It's just very comforting for them both when the water is splashing over them and they're like kissing or hugging. Feels nice :]

AAAAA He is just a fancy guy who likes to stay clean and being taken care of 💙🖤

[nerves-nebula]

Yeah! Fantasy racism is a subject that I think about a lot, like- racism exists because colonism and colonism only exists because the state wants to make a profit

Reducing racism to fear of the body is something a lot of fantasy writers do and it always bothers me

But it's also something that I worry I will stumble into accidently- like I'm brown but I have this little world building project where I want to put my own experiences with racism but i always worry that I'm gonna fumble it badly- because ultimately these fantasy characters aren't human, so my experiences won't translate completely

I think the issue comes from the range of xenofiction is out there, like from end end of the spectrum you got stories from perspective real life rabbit trying to evade a real life fox then which is all about the animals experience rather than a human one, then you got works like zootopia from the other end, trying to insert the human experience of racism into the mix qnd failing badly cause these are animals, its not gonna translate

Which is why despite bodies being a big part of my world building project I'm touching the fear of the body aspect of racism, not only because its already a miniscule aspect of racism that gets overly focused on but also because these characters aren't human so its just make me end up in a zootopia situation

IDK, does this make sense, I'm still not sure how I feel about fantasy racism as a trope in general so if you disagree with any points (or all of them) I'd like to hear

idk i think including fantasy racism is fine but you'll have to really deconstruct WHY racism is bad far past the basic "don't descriminate against people" stage, otherwise i think you wont be able to critique it well enough and might end up perpetuating your own biases (it's alright we've all got them)

what i try to remember when writing fantasy racism is that whatever the racist people need to claim about the people they're being racist against NEEDS to be not true in order to be at all analogous to human racism. and it's best if the racism is within one species, so as to not accept the idea that there are genuine genetic differences between races of people, seeing as "race" isnt really a scientific category.

oh, and the bigots should probably try really hard to make it seem credible, to the point that people who don't think they're personally a bigot could even think that the racist ppl are being reasonable sometimes. but at it's core, it needs to just NOT BE TRUE.

like for example in Bright, people are "racist" against the orcs because the orcs sided with a dark overlord in the past (i think). which is an interesting idea, but because bright is clearly making the orcs analogous to black people, it just ends up coming off as really insulting. black people and similarly racially coded minorities didn't side with an evil guy a thousand years ago, that's not why white ppl enslaved and impoverished and murdered us lmao.

like that could be an interesting world building thing about descendants being punished and discriminated against for the actions of ancient ancestors and stuff. but like. they're coded as black people. and that's just NOT MUY BUENO.

zootopia was kind of shit in a lot of ways but one thing i do appreciate and that i think they got right is that the "going feral" thing was a LIE. in the fiction of zootopia, predator animals aren't actually inherently more dangerous. and it wasnt just a LIE it was a CONSPIRACY to play on people's prejudiced fears in order to gain power or something idk i forget. everything else aside i think that was a good call.

and yknow you dont always have to make it a "race" thing specifically. people have been bigoted against each other for their looks for a long time, but race specifically is pretty new. ethnicities and cultures and traditions are also things you can write people to be bigoted against. it doesn't have to be a 1 to 1 analogy for IRL modern day racism in america or anything.

i also enjoy stories like Beastars, where it develops its own worlds premise well enough that it feels more like an exploration of an interesting concept than a clunky racism or sexism analogy.

idk im not even much of a writer. i just like to think about stuff.

[hotchs-big-hands]

Today turned out to be Pretty Bad™ stuck down very awful bad memory lane and I just wanna clarify to ppl why I may not always answer dms/asks etc. I've only really told one person on here the big details about this, and I won't go into all the details here either but it'll be enough to explain why. I hope anyway. Idk why I'm doing this.

I'll give a quick tl;dr here because it is long and also goes into very triggering topics such as self harm/suicide.

Basically I used to have a very close best friend, who I'll call shithead, back in early 2018 until late 2022 who extremely manipulative, emotionally abusive and just very overall toxic. If you've ever seen me refer to a "shithead" in tags or whatever then its about the person imma talk abt here. I was essentially the person they turned to to talk them out of doing things to themselves, if you get me. As well as a lot of other stuff. Ended up getting therapy (but not for the right reasons tbh) and also got a bad coping mechanism where I tend to not talk to people, I keep my distance and its smth I wanna tackle but it's difficult. So if you haven't heard back from me it's not cuz I don't like you, I am fighting with my brain. Also I kinda question if I actually am a good person or not because of stuff that I did in retaliation to this person.

I'll get into details now under the cut but yeah don't read if self harm/suicide/toxic dynamics are something you don't want to hear about for whatever reason.

As above, in early 2018 I used to have a different fanfic blog for a different fandom. I won't go into detail about which fandom and what the blog was but it was fairly popular. This is how I came to be friends with them. And like at the beginning it was fucking great! We became fast friends and we had a lot of shared interests. They introduced me to a lot of games, TV shows etc. But that's also where the problems started.

They were one of those types of fans. The "very possessive over certain characters" type of fan. If they liked them and had a crush on them then you couldn't do the same cuz character belonged to them. Which at the time I didn't rly like but I used to be friends with someone in high school who was also like that about characters so I assumed it was just a thing ppl did. However, it escalated to if I had a character I liked then they'd for some reason not like them and in fact hated them. This was kinda draining cuz they never wanted to talk abt stuff I liked, without actually directly saying so. They'd just shit talk them the whole time or say they hate them. So I stopped talking about what I liked. Later, they'd suddenly really like said media or characters and only then was it fine to talk about them. But in turn they'd be possessive and if I said oh okay I'll step back from them they would make me feel like I was being stupid because "no they didn't say I couldn't like them".

Anyway thats not rly the worst of it of course, the actual bad stuff is now so again, final warning for self harm/suicide. Will square off the triggering sections.

*********************

They struggled with their mental health a lot. Like a lot. I'd be there for them to listen, offer help and support because I like to take care of ppl and make sure they'll be okay. Except it escalated to them using me to talk them out of harming themself and killing themself. And this was almost everyday/night. And need I just say they were an hour ahead of me as well btw. I went to university in 2019 originally and by December I was completely burnt out because I spent every day and night making sure they didn't fucking do anything to themself. I got at most 2-3 hours of sleep a night if I was lucky and I stopped doing my hobbies and uni work because I just had no drive to do them anymore. It was clear I was also suffering mentally. I was suicidal and thinking of harming myself as well (and unfortunately I did do so a couple times). But I prioritised them. Everything was triggering for them, and I mean that. I had a long list pinned to my wall of everything I was to avoid mentioning because it would trigger them.

They never took care about my own mental health btw, which I'm not saying they HAD to but I know it was because they just didn't care. And they said as much too. They said because they are autistic they have no empathy and therefore do not feel anything about my mental health. So I suffered basically alone.

*********************

I dropped out of uni in early 2020 and in fact went home the weekend lockdown began in the UK. Things were not good. I was still trying to be support for shithead, I went to therapy and started medication for the wrong reasons. I wanted to get better so I could take care of them. Which like. Never do that. Never go to therapy so you can be someone else's therapist. Go to therapy because YOU want to be better for YOURSELF.

We were in in a bigger friendship group spread across a few discord servers and they all broke down one way or another. One instance there was an argument between shithead and a bunch of others who were comparing who had it worse during ww2. The others were Americans but were also of Jewish heritage with family who were affected by the holocaust and shithead lives in a country near where the holocaust happened with relatives who went through a famine. Either way it was just not gonna be a good conversation. Shithead left, I stayed and like I already don't rly talk to people much in groups because its overwhelming but I did do a little bit. Someone who was friends with shithead and still in the server told shithead I was talking to the others and in turn I basically betrayed shithead. Hindsight I wish I had just left the server ages before and like maybe j shouldn't have talked to the others idk. I regret it either way and think abt it a lot.

Another few shitty things I did in response to how shithead would treat me is giving them the silent treatment, giving short answers etc. I wanted them to feel bad, but it would round back to me being told I'm a coward and horrible to them. Which maybe I was but frankly I was scared of them.

*********************

Things began to rly break down when they showed me their fresh self harm wounds, blood and all, because they were "bored". I didn't talk to them for a few days and their apology wasn't much of an apology, more just making excuses again (aka I have autism so it's not my fault). I started talking less and less because by this point my brain had had enough ig and began to close off from them and just ppl in general.

*********************

In 2022 I finally returned to university and thats also when I finally stopped talking to them. A few months ago I finally blocked them on everything. However, I still struggle with communication and don't rly do it much. It's difficult to maintain friendships and I don't trust easily. I plan on going back to therapy whenever i can because this is just unresolved. But yeah idk I'm sorry to everyone who I haven't responded to, or take a long time to respond to.

One thing that is good tho is that like, after shithead I didn't enjoy anything. I didn't rly watch or hyperfixate on anything. But last year around this time I came across an Aaron Hotchner x plus size reader fic and I've been obsessed with him since!! And now here we are, got a blog and everything for a fandom finally after so long :) so it's not all bad.

But yeah that's why I struggle keeping up with messages and asks. Idk if anyone is gonna read this but if you've read this far then thank you and you mean a lot. Big hugs to yawl and I hope yawl have a lovely day, and if not then please take it easy 💖💖💖💖

[onlythebravest]

✨️ Twenty Questions for Fic Writers ✨️

Thank you @disgruntledkittenface for tagging me! These questions things are always so fun to read and answer!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

37.

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

212 726

3. What fandoms do you write for?

rigt now, 1D and hockey rpf. I've written for harry potter and acotar before though

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

in order; never been a fan of change, but we're still the same, in the pub that we met he's got his arms around you, dream about a summer night, a conversation starter and these arms were made for holding you

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

yes! almost always. for different reasons. as a reader, I always enjoy getting replies to comments I've left. it also motivates me to leave more comments, esp on that author's fics. that's just how I work. and since I like and want that, I assume it's the same for other ppl so I do that to them. it's also bc getting comments sometimes makes my entire day, and it makes me so happy, and I want to let them know that

6. What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

i'm not sure i've written anything with an angsty ending? oh wait, two of my older mini fics do. the loss of a friend and what are we now? both have pretty angsty endings, or at least not happy ones. so i'll go with them.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

the rest of them? no, but I prefer happy endings so I think almost all of the rest have. all of my top five kudos ones that I mentioned above are the first ones I'd pick, so take your pick among those. but if I were to pick another one... most of the rest are kinda happy throughout the entire fic and then the ending doesn't feel as happy. so to pick one that's not happy throughout, but has a happy ending, I'll go with maybe we're good, maybe we're not.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

no, i don't. i've gotten some rude comments, but that's as far as it's gotten luckily

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

yes, i've written a little. it's still a bit out of my comfort zone though, esp posting it, but i've written some m/m smut of different variants.

10. Do you write crossovers? What the craziest one you've written?

no. or well, technically yes, but it's an abandoned wip that i don't like so that's all you're gonna get about it

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not as far as i'm aware, so i hope not

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

no

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

nope. I was part of a round robin, but that got abandoned and I vowed never to do it again. group projects are not my thing 😂

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

I don't think I have one. I change favorites so often, so I don't think I can say I've got an all-time fave

15. What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

oh multiple! I have one that I do doubt I'll ever finish but I still hope I will so so much, so I'm not gonna give up on that one just yet. instead, I have one that's even less likely I'll finish. it's a fantasy one, enemies to lovers (I should've known it was doomed already then, that's not my thing), magic that was based around elements. it's main feature is that it has a "who did this to you?" between two ppl who don't like each other, which is something I love. maybe I'll end up publishing only that scene, it can be read as a stand-alone so it's not that bad of an idea actually

16. What are your writing strengths?

dialogue, I think. specifically banter, I think I'm pretty good at that. I always manage to write it in at least and have a lot of fun writing it!

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I feel like I write pretty short sentences, making paragraphs sound a bit choppy. I'm also an expert in writing english sentences with swedish grammar, so I feel for my beta that has to correct that shit. esp when the sentence doesn't even make sense in English and it's a guessing game😂

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

if it's important to the plot, then yeah, that could be nice. but it's a bit of a pet peeve of mine when i read dialgoue in swedish and it's obvious that the author has used google translate, it bothers me. i'd rather read it in english with an accompanying "says in swedish" rather than the inaccurate translation. but that's probably bc it's my native language. when it's in languages i don't understand i don't have that issue obviously.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

harry potter probably? at least that I posted for, might've written something that I didn't realise was technically for fandom when I was younger

20. Favorite fic you've written?

oh, hm... right now it's probably a tie between does it always end in heartbreak? and maybe we're good, maybe we're not. but that's probably bc those are the latest ones I published. one favorite I always mention is one of the drabbles in the drabble collection snapshots of moments, the one in chapter 11, pretty when you beg

Since this was the first one I saw of these, I'm not sure who has done them, but I'll tag @greenfeelings, @neondiamond, @larrysballetslippers, @lunarheslwt, @sun-lt, @hellolovers13, @zjofierose and @zanniscaramouche. oh and if you see this and want to do this, just say I tagged you because I want to read it!

[borderlinereminders]

Can I ask you a question? My therapist tried to reassure me that things tend to get better for ppl with BPD when they are in their 30s, but I'm 19 right now and it feels horrible, and that is so far away to hurt so much, how did you manage to get through it? I'm trying so hard and it feels like everything sucks anyways, especially because I'm physically disabled too :(

I didn't have some major break through, or life changing thought process that fixed things for me.

I held on to little things until I was ready to try and recover.

It was little things like when I'd have suicidal thoughts, I'd tell myself things like "my dog won't understand why I don't come home". I'd remind myself of the new season of my show I wanted to see. I'd find little things to look forward to.

Overall, I'd tell myself "you can kill yourself any time. It doesn't have to be now. Why not stick it out and reassess later? What is there to lose by trying?" People have definitely expressed a dislike for that train of though of mine but it worked for me.

I also want to say that while a lot of people experience things getting better in their 30's, that isn't always the case. Maybe she was trying to reassure you that it wouldn't always feel this way and not set you up for unrealistic expectations. But I can understand why it feels discouraging and I think she should have approached that better with you.

For me, things started getting better a lot sooner. I started managing my symptoms bit by bit. Things like finding skills for working on my harmful urges (these usually led to my friendships failing which just added to my hurt at the time) or finding ways to self soothe and cope made it all suck a little less in the moment. I focused on the good. A lack of emotional permanence can make that hard because when it feels bad it feels like everything is bad. But I'd focus on little things like "oh, a book I'm excited for is coming out" or "I can't wait to go cuddle my dog". I intentionally had to walk myself through and do these things, but I realized at some point that they come more naturally to me now.

I didn't focus on a big goal. I just focused on working on little things and over time I realized that I was doing so much better. I think one important thing to remember is it doesn't happen overnight. And I don't say this to be discouraging but to be encouraging. What I mean by this is you aren't just magically better one day. It's a gradual thing and isn't always linear. This means that it likely won't hurt to this intensity the entire time you're trying to get through things. ( I noticed at some point that while I still had bad days, they were usually less severe and less frequent). And maybe it'll feel more manageable a lot earlier than you expect.

[piplupod]

also (sorry i'm chatty today and just in general as of late lol) it's really weird to be talking to people at the centre (mainly the leaders/ppl in charge) because they always comment on how many hobbies and interests I have and like. I kind of forget that this is apparently abnormal? I just... I like a lot of things? and I try a lot of things. at some point I changed my perspective from "oh man I could never do that!" when I saw something cool to "hmm I wonder how I could do that?" and I either try things out exactly the way I see other ppl doing them or I adapt it to work for me with my restraints (constraints?) on money/energy/skill level/etc.

and i'm also very quick to jump on opportunities to try things! there is not a lot available because of where I live (small town, rural, conservative, etc) so when things pop up that I am able to try out I jump on them immediately!

when an opportunity arose to learn the accordion (classes were offered and my neighbour offered to lend theirs to me) I hopped on it so fucking fast because I knew if I didn't then I'd likely never have the chance to learn it ever again! when someone is giving away art supplies for free/very cheap, i will usually take it because I know I'll find a use for it (or I can rehome it if I end up realizing I can't use it). when someone offers to show me how to do something (like skin a mouse), I will agree because why the fuck not! i love learning!

but then people always look at me like I possess some incredible talent just because I have so many hobbies and interests and weird bits of knowledge like... no ? 😭 I just try things. and I give myself the grace to learn new things and be bad at them and continue to try if I have the interest. I hate being told this is my autistic superpower or that I'm some kind of creative savant because I genuinely just... work hard. to learn things. I practice a lot. I enjoy making stuff so I do it a lot because it makes me feel good and keeps me from killing myself dsdgjkl. it feels like they dismiss all the time and work I put into this stuff. I honest to god think just about anyone could do this if they just decided to put the time into it. I'm not special for it, I'm honestly just desperate to be good at something so I put a lot of work into this.