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makeste · 3 years

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BnHA Chapter 325: Deku VS the Outside of U.A. ~Conclusion~

Previously on BnHA: Ochako was all “dear bloodthirsty mob, this kid you see standing before you has fought harder than anyone and put his life on the line to protect you all, so please chill the fuck out, jesus christ. like, putting aside that he’s humanity’s best hope and so it’s very much in your best interests to let him rest and recover someplace safe so that he can keep fighting for us, are y’all seriously going to turn away an injured and exhausted child in front of his sobbing mother?? seriously?? come on now.” I’m paraphrasing here but that’s basically how it went down. Anyway so then the mob was all, “...” and Deku collapsed to his knees in tears, and Gigantic Fox Lady and Kouta ran over to give him a hug but then the chapter ended.

Today on BnHA: Horikoshi is all “FINE, YOU CAN HUG HIM”, which, was that so hard?? The U.A. Clown Mob is all “come to think of it, we’ve kind of been taking the heroes for granted this entire time, maybe we should be less passive in the future. anyway so Deku if it’s not too much to ask, can you please save everyone and fix everything.” Deku is all “I sure can, and by the way I forgive you for swarming around all menacingly two minutes ago and trying to deny me basic shelter and stuff.” Ectoplasm is all, “hey Todogang get a load of this. [walks in a circle].” Hawks is all, “that’s literally the greatest thing I’ve ever seen.” Rat Principal is all, “anyway so that’s what your students did today, hope you’re enjoying your new *~*ROBOT LEG*~*, Aizawa.” Aizawa is all “[lots of exposition about Kurogiri and for some reason, Toga, while being all brooding and sexy].” All Might is all “[standing here right outside of U.A. doing absolutely nothing and being foreboding AF]” and that immediately sucked away all of the warm fuzzy feelings from the hugs, goddammit.

each new week has become a waiting game of “when will Deku finally get to take a bath so people will actually be willing to go near him and give him the hugs he deserves.” the stakes have never been so compelling. I’ve almost forgotten about AFO entirely

lmaoooooo

me: for the love of god will someone please give Deku a hug before I die of old age

Mineta: YOU GOT IT!! --

Iida: [SWIFTLY CUTS HIM OFF] NOT YOU

fucking losing it at Mineta’s crying face. he really wanted to hug him. I legit feel bad but this is also the funniest thing I have seen all week, omg

somehow Kouta, who last week was only a hand’s breadth away from touching Deku’s head, is now twenty miles away from him in this new chapter

can I make a Loki reference here. is this recap a good place to insert a joke about someone using a TVA time-rewinding device to fuck with my poor boy Kouta over here. well anyway there it is

AND NOW HE’S BACK ALL OF A SUDDEN OMG

(ETA: since when is he “niichan” omg?? can’t handle this cuteness.)

BUT THEY’RE STILL NOT HUGGING HIM FFFFKFFFFF. WHAT DO I HAVE TO DO. WHO DO I HAVE TO BRIBE AND/OR BLACKMAIL

OH NO KOUTA IS CRYING THAT’S IT I’M DONE FOR

“when I heard that lady I knew that I had to go, but then stop again within inches of actually touching you because you smell like week-old rotten onions.” listen Kouta, I’m not saying I don’t get it, but you all can’t keep doing this to me. it’s the way you guys keep teasing it. like, if you’re gonna hug him, hug him. don’t just stand there with your arms held rigidly out in front of you like a molded action figure

OH MY GOSH BUT HE SAID THE THING

KOUTA SWOOPING IN AT THE LAST MINUTE TO TAKE ALL THE CREDIT FOR FIXING DEKU LIKE THAT ONE KID IN THE GROUP PROJECT WHO DOES ABSOLUTELY NOTHING BUT STILL TAGS HIS NAME ONTO THE REPORT ANYWAY, WHAT A KNAVE

GASP

( ´͈ ᗨ `͈ )

SHE PICKED HIM UP LIKE A LITTLE BABY OMG?? she just leaned right over and lifted this child like he was a small animal. like a lil baby futon that she was about to hang up to dry. oh my god

-- HEY WHAT

(: well that’s extremely fucked up. though sadly not too surprising given what we just saw these past couple chapters

incidentally, I hope that anyone who was legitimately defending the civilians’ perspective earlier takes note here of how quickly that line of thinking -- “we’re just trying to keep our families safe” and all that-- can lead to straight up bigotry. if you’re willing to deny a child shelter and protection simply because he’s not YOUR child, and because you’ve decided based on Internet rumors (no real-world parallels there, I’m sure) that he might present a threat, it’s really not that much further of a leap to discriminating against entire groups of people simply because you perceive those groups as being dangerous. I’m sure the people who turned Gigantic Fox Lady away also told themselves afterwards that they did it to protect their families. “better safe than sorry.” “she’ll be fine, someone will take her in, but as for us, we can’t afford to take that risk.” people can come up with all kinds of justifications for treating other people as less than human, and the really scary thing about it is how fucking easy it is

one last quick side note, which is that Horikoshi does a great job here of showing how scapegoating works, given that AFO is the one who’s really to blame and who presents the actual threat, and yet Deku is the one who ultimately winds up being the target of the mob’s fear and outrage despite him being as much of a victim as they are. gotta love that irony, which unfortunately plays out far too often in the real world as well.

anyway I’ll get off my soapbox now, sorry about that. let us continue

YES, FINALLY OH MY GOD!!!!

AND THAT’S THE STORY OF HOW GIGANTIC FOX LADY BECAME THE GREATEST HERO. PACK IT ALL UP, WE’RE DONE HERE KIDS

holy shit. the real MVP right there. thanks for getting it done champ

jesus christ I have had it up to here with these people

literally the bar is set so low at this point that I’ll go ahead and take it. helping him because it offers them a tactical advantage is at least one step up from not helping him at all

“WHY NOT SHIKETSU” MOTHERFUCKER I SWEAR TO GOD

-- thank you!!

okay this one guy with the antennae hair is having himself a character development speedrun here

-- okay, but this part?? fucking this part, right here??

can we repeat that again?? the part where this guy acknowledges that the problems of hero society were caused not just by said heroes, but also by said society?? the part where he acknowledges that they treated the heroes like celebrities who were putting on a show for them?? the part where he acknowledges that when push came to shove, the vast majority of those heroes, when faced with a situation that offered no reward, were nonetheless willing to put their lives on the line to protect the very same people who then turned around and blamed them rather than thanking them?? are the civilians of BnHA even allowed to have actual deep thoughts about this stuff. holy shit

bro!!

ANTENNAE HAIR GUY SHOVING KOUTA AND GIGANTIC FOX LADY OUT OF THE WAY TO SLAP HIS NAME ONTO THE END CREDITS AS EXECUTIVE PRODUCER. CONGRATULATIONS SON YOU FIGURED OUT THE CORE PHILOSOPHICAL QUESTION AT THE VERY HEART OF THE MANGA. WAY TO GO BUD

meanwhile, on today’s episode of “one more chapter to go till the big volume cliffhanger, how else can I drag things out let’s see”

it’s a panel. of people’s feet. just a bunch of normal feet. with sneakers and shit

this All Might shirt guy is getting more screentime in this arc than 90% of the class 1-A kids

I guess I’m supposed to feel sorry for this dude now that he’s all “if we let you stay here do you promise to somehow magically fix every single problem that we are now currently facing?” those are some ridiculously exacting standards my dude. come on now

KACCHAN SIGHTING

thank fuck I’m not the only one who’s thoroughly unimpressed by absolutely all of this lol. I feel better now. meanwhile Iida and Kouda and Kiri are ready to run over there and hug them all. you guys are way too forgiving. damn you and your pure hearts

anyway so Deku’s like “yeah, definitely”

(ETA: almost forgot to comment on the “I’m no longer alone” part – he basically corrects the guy and says “sorry, but you’ll need to direct that question towards all of us, not just me, because moving forward we’re a team.” good stuff.)

you know what though, all joking aside... fuck yeah. because perfect victory, right. the strongest guys don’t settle for anything less. so I guess Deku has pretty exacting standards himself

also can you all just take a look at this fucking kid who’s got so much light in his eyes now that I’m gonna need eclipse goggles. hot damn. “you’re welcome” says All Might Shirt Guy as he is frantically interviewed by several local news networks asking him how he daringly managed to save Deku all by himself. “well I guess I’ve just never been the kind of guy who can sit back and let a bunch of rabble-rousers blame a little kid for all of humanity’s problems. someone had to step in and take action, you know?”

oH MY GOD THE SCENE IS FINALLY ENDING

don’t let the door hit you on your way out All Might Shirt Guy

but meanwhile, sudden Tododrama action??

oh shit

there are honestly so many ways in which Ochako’s very moving speech could have wildly backfired that I genuinely have no clue where this is headed lol. how exciting!!

so now Horikoshi is once again stalling for time with random filler panels, but this one is 10x better than the shoes lol omg

(1) was Ectoplasm’s jacket always this oversized. (2) did you guys know that if you go back to chapter 319 you can see that Horikoshi gave us a sneak peak at Enji’s Sad Detective disguise and I in fact made a joke about it in the 319 recap not realizing it was actually the stone cold truth. (3) did Shouto deliberately speed up out of impatience because Hawks was walking so fucking slow and he couldn’t take it any longer. (4) and what, I ask you, is up with these dramatic speedlines. so many mysteries here. what a masterpiece

everyone is acting all shocked about something ahh what’s going on

wait what

what the heck. did they just loop around behind everyone. what was the point of that lol. “anyway, so this is what they look like from the back” well okay, thanks for that Ectoplasm

(ETA: so it seems like they were actually hanging out someplace else away from the crowd this whole time, I guess? here I thought they had more faith in Enji’s disguise. I guess Shouto and Hawks don’t particularly want to attract this crowd’s attention themselves right now either, though.)

I am so fucking confused lmao

speaking of All Might WHERE THE FUCK IS HE lol. but yes, good, OFA brings everyone together, and Hawks is very deeply moved about this out of the blue all of a sudden. you know how it is

aw heck yeah now this is another filler panel I can get behind

Mineta really wants that hug, good lord. I genuinely love this actually. Mineta if you could just stay little and cute and keep crying about how much you love your classmates in a non-gross way for the rest of the series I would be so appreciative. you’re doing great

IIDA IS HOLDING DEKU’S HAND THIS IS NOT A DRILL. ONE TIME WASN’T ENOUGH FOR MY MAN HE’S ADDICTED NOW

what did I tell you. Kiri wants to get all of the mob’s autographs now. Kiri you’re a peach

Shouji having a conversation with another mutant type is a very nice touch! we really need to get to his backstory soon. I feel like that casual remark from GFL earlier was kind of hinting at more to come

is this the first time we’ve ever seen the Yaoyorictionary in action?? never forget that Viz tried to call it the “Yaoyorozu Reference Book” because they hate fun

last but not least, KAMIBAKU IS BACK ON THE MENU, FUCK YEAH. Kaminari trying to spice things up and introduce a little bit of controversy by smacking Kacchan on the back of the head for god knows what. I will be deeply disappointed after this if I can’t find at least one person unironically declaring that KamiBaku is now toxic and abusive

lfkdlWLWK TODODRAMA??

oh my god. Shouto’s face. Enji’s face. the back to “oyaji” again. the blunt, not-taking-no-for-an-answer, “I don’t know how much louder the universe can scream at you that doing things alone is not it, so hopefully you got the point” directness of it. fffdlkslj I’m so ready for this Horikoshi please don’t fuck it up my expectations are so high

HOLY FUCK

I SCROLLED DOWN AND HE WAS ALL “( ❛‿❛)” AND I JUST WASN’T FUCKING EXPECTING THAT OKAY. JESUS CHRIST. GIVE ME A SEC

lol okay moment over and now Enji’s pulling his hat down all dramatically like a world-weary Cowboy

OH MY GOD WERE YOU FACETIMING??

AHHHHHHHHH

(ETA: not to put Iida down or anything, but it’s kind of strange that Aizawa is all “the class rep sure did great” when Ochako is the one that was giving that whole big speech for like twenty minutes just now lol.)

(ETA 2: “thank god Iida stepped in just in the nick of time to keep Mineta from hugging Deku.” sorry Mineta I really do like you lately but it’s still low-hanging fruit lol.)

HE LOOKS SO SAD??! HE LOOKS LIKE HEARTBREAK ITSELF??! I AM BESOUGHT WITH THE URGE TO REACH INTO MY SCREEN AND PULL HIM INTO THE SAFETY OF MY ARMS??? MY GOD, AND I THOUGHT DEKU NEEDED HUGS

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH okay I was gonna just hold down the letter H for a full minute and count it out loud but within about ten seconds I realized I needed to chill lol

-- but then again NO, I DON’T NEED TO CHILL, I HAVE ZERO CHILL, ACTUALLY, BECAUSE IT’S AIZAWA WITH A ROBOT LEG AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

COMPLETE WITH ROBOT TOES FOR THAT EXTRA TOUCH OF AUTHENTICITY!! I LIKE HOW HORIKOSHI PUT ALL THIS EXTRA “!!!” EMPHASIS AROUND IT IN CASE WE COULD SOMEHOW POSSIBLY FAIL TO TAKE NOTICE. “REMEMBER, EVERYONE?” SAYS HORIKOSHI HELPFULLY. “REMEMBER THAT TIME AIZAWA CHOPPED OFF HIS OWN LEG?” oh wow now that you mention it we somehow forgot all about that. like who do you take us for

OH NO NOT THE SAD BOYFRIEND ANGST THAT I WAS SECRETLY LOOKING FORWARD TO WITH GLEE

well at least he’s not M.I.A. or back with the villains again like I thought he might be. still, that’s gotta be brutal to know your friend is in there somewhere, but to not be able to reach him again no matter how hard you try. that’s the kind of angst that pays off in final battles just when you most expect it. such is my hope, at any rate

what’s this now??

trying to decide if this is Horikoshi’s way of saying don’t worry about that, or his way of saying definitely worry about that lol

anyway so Aizawa is out here being all irresponsibly handsome once again. when is someone going to do something about him

here for Sexy Robot Leg Eyepatch Aizawa clenching his fists and making speeches about revenge. pretty sure we’re all here for that

WELL, WELL, WELL

IT’S ABOUT FUCKING TIME

I’M VERY GLAD YOU’RE ALIVE AND SEEMINGLY WELL, THOUGH!

BUT WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK THOUGH, ALL MIGHT

ffff. bracing myself for that cliffhanger next week. you’d better not touch one hair on this man’s head Horikoshi. I’m watching you

#bnha 325 #midoriya izuku #u.a. clown mob #class 1-a #aizawa shouta #bnha #boku no hero academia #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #bnha manga spoilers #makeste reads bnha

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studiojeon · 3 years

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troubled outsiders | intro - jjk

| summary | - how you two end up pining for each other.

warnings: none :)

content: idol!jungkook x student!oc, friends to lovers (because it’s THE superior trope okurrrt), jungkook is quiet and shy but a social butterfly when needed (and when it comes to oc but you’re not supposed to know that yet), oc is both a badass and a socially akward queen, she has TWO friends and only because one is dating the other (like... same), the Lee Charyeong is her bestie, oc works at bighit and feels like everyone either fears her or hates her, author nim is a crackhead and has no plot planned for this series whatsoever (doesn’t know if she’ll keep this up, we’ll see).

words: 1.93 k

His presence was overwhelming, to say the least. Even if he were surrounded by six hundred other equally handsome men, somehow, to you (and the majority of the female population, at that point) he was as captivating and magnetic as they come. Jeon Jungkook didn't pay no mind to no one, but sure as hell everyone became hyper aware of his existence and essence in time. And that didn’t exclude you.

Yet, as nonchalant and indifferent as the man could be perceived, in reality he was more considerate and friendly than the aura he exuded. You knew this because working in the same company had to teach a thing or two about the people who literally carried said company and the whole industry at some point, still you barely knew four or three people, including your assistant and Jungkook, whom you had met once.

The opportunity of working at the company had come to you out of the blue, quite literally, you were attempting to send one of your assignments in when an email appeared in your notifications during your sailor moon study break.

HYBE Entertainment

We’re glad to inform you that you’re being recruited for the position of Logistics Manager in one of our sub companies, BIGHIT Entertainment. We’ve thoroughly looked through the CV you’ve submitted and are very interested in your capabilities and what you can contribute to our organization. One of our other managers will gladly meet you on a day you can both agree on. Make sure to answer this email to get more details about your interview.

“Nani!? THE FUCK?” sure as hell that your eyes and cognitive functions were deceiving you (ADHD) you went over the text a little over three times in a row before the message settled in your mind. This was sus.

Before even considering a reply you made a quick call. “Fucking Lee Chaeryeong” you spat on your end of the line. “You did this, didn’t you?”.

Her silence was more than enough to have you cursing her under your breath. “I don’t know what exactly you’re talking about but it most likely was me. Does it have to do with a sex toy in particular?”

“No” you denied almost monotonously, guessing the pile of boxes in the corner of your room with her names on them was what she referred to. “Does anything come to mind if i mention BIGHIT FUCKING ENTERTAINMENT?”

It was her. All those conversations during the summer about how badly you wanted to work in the entertainment business as marketing staff of some sort had their effect on your friend, who, despite all your excuses and denials, knew you better than you and your mom combined did, and because of this, was sure as hell you were not making a move towards that goal whatsoever. So, being the boss bitch she was, she took matters into her own hands, was what she explained.

You concluded that was the reason you had reached a point in your life where you had more experience than most recently graduated kids in your field, because Chaeryeong had you moving every summer break. You had been the manager of a coffee franchise and convenience store during you junior and senior years, and also figured a way to improve the marketing management strategy of a fucking restaurant while at it. Not to toot your own horn, but you were kind of cool.

Or not. “I hope this job satisfies your workaholic ass for once, I’m running out of ideas”. Chaeryeong spat before hanging up.

Sure as hell it would.

On friday afternoon, you made your way to the HYBE INSIGHT building and introduced yourself to your recruiters who promised to give you a call at some point. “It went fine” you told Chaeryeong once you were in your car. And it was the truth, however you weren’t so sure if they would actually hire you at some point since well, you were a girl in a male dominated industry and, in your opinion, there were always better people than you. “Wanna go grab coffee?”

“I want to. But, I have practice today. I’m actually on my way there. Please avoid driving through Hongdae today, this shit’s packed.” You sighed and thanked her for the heads up. You missed your friend, badly. You hadn’t seen each other in three weeks, and you didn’t even live so far away from each other (you did, but it had been worse before). You two had very agitated lives to say the least. Chaeryeong was a kpop group member, and well, you were jumping from job to job and getting your phD in Business Management at the same time. It was hard to find moments to spare together during some periods of the year, but you guess the anticipation made your encounters better.

“Talk about anticipation” you slammed your forehead against your desk, taking a breather after such an anxiety packed situation. Short story: you got the job (for some fucking reason). And you had gone through a whole week of expectancy and anguish. Not getting that job would have broken your heart, and ego at the same time.

You guessed the law of attraction tactics Chaeryeong had taught you had sorted their effect and were what led you to your current position in life.

“Miss _____, your presentation’s ready” your work assistant gave you a comforting pat in the back as she took a seat somewhere next to you. You were nervous, shitless. It was your fifth week at the job, and being the proactive woman you were, you had collected lots of data in order to come up with a resources management plan.

It was a Thursday afternoon, and more than a hundred people sat in front of you, waiting for your speech. Including him, who you’d once bumped into accidentally during one of your data recollections runs inside the building.

You hated having the need to impress others yet, hence your anxious behaviour. But this was a decisive moment in regards to your validation in your new job and how you’d continue to be perceived during your work stance (no reason to panic at all)… you needed to get it together.

“I think I just pissed off a bunch of old men right now,” you told your assistant right after you got off stage. “I need a bathroom break”. Linh gave you a reassuring smile, one she always had plastered on her face.

“Take as long as you need to. I’ll give you a call once the rest are done”.

The commute to the bathroom was unnecessarily complicated in your opinion. You had spent a little over a month rushing through the hallways of the building and you swore every single day your spatial orientation got a bit more fucked up. There was no way there wasn’t a single bathroom on the floor you were in, that would just be atrocious. “It’s not completed yet” someone said beside you as you stared at the half empty map the company had projected on a wall next to the elevators. “Where do you need to go?”

Kim Taehyung of all people in the world was talking to your ugly and unworthy ass. Your breath caught in your throat and after staring for at least five seconds your body finally reacted to your orders. “Oh, um… the bathroom. I’ve been looking for it for a good ten minutes” you explained with a nervous laugh.

“Trust me, I get it. I still get lost over here” he smiled gently. “It’s in the hallway in the middle of the next hallway”

You laughed at his very ambiguous explanation. “Thank you” you bowed your head and made your way to said destination.

It was in the hallway to your left, not your right, and it took you a while to figure out that new piece of information. Once you were staring at yourself in the mirror, you realized that you looked considerably tired and exhausted from all the social interaction you had undergone throughout the day. You were used to the side stares and whispering you’d get whenever you entered a room at that point, but some days you just wished you could get a break from them. After all, it wasn’t your fault you didn’t look Korean at all, and that you also didn’t fit the stereotype of a foreigner.

You got that from your mom, both the non Korean features and social fatigue. But that wasn’t even the problem most of the time, it was your friendly and smart nature which she had also passed onto you. Some would consider it a blessing, but to you it was a burden, like a clear glass that shielded you from introducing yourself into other people’s realities. You had few friends and people to trust, but in your everyday life you had to deal with the pressure of standing out too much and that came with a lot of negative energy from others. You sigh as you spray your favorite fragrance on yourself. You could be feeling like shit, but no one will ever catch you slipping.

But that excluded him apparently. You hadn’t noticed that on the other side of the hallway was the men’s bathroom and the realization hit you as you were calmly getting some tea from the vending machine. “Good afternoon” the man greeted you as he made his way out the hallway, but stopped in his tracks right after he noticed you. “_____! Hi” he smiled at you and you wanted to die, suddenly forgetting what you were ordering in the first place.

“H-hi Jungkook” You smiled back, poorly attempting to put your wallet back into your backpack.

“Need help there?” he noticed your agitated state and held your bag for you. He smelled just as heavenly as you had expected, somewhat between big dick energy and flowers. Oh, and he also remained as kind and polite as you remembered him.

Seeming as if he wasn’t planning on continuing his path to wherever he was heading to in the first place, he stood quietly by your side, waiting for you to be done with your deal. “How have you been?” you break the ice for him.

Quickly, you grab your tea and start walking back to the auditorium together, unaware of your surroundings or the suspicions that could arise. “Busy, but very good. How have you been? I saw your presentation earlier… I wish I understood half of what you said but you still sounded amazing”.

And you would never admit it out loud, but you were positive you were blushing (and falling in love too - platonically, of course). “Oh god, you think so? I basically told them they’ve been doing things wrong all along so maybe you’re the only one who’s appreciative of my work” you handed him the second can of iced tea you bought without him noticing. You swear his eyes lit up like stars in the night sky. “Payback for the other day” you smile at him.

The first time you two had crossed paths you didn’t look nearly as glamorous as you did now. In fact, you looked incredibly disturbed and in pain, carrying a huge pile of paperwork in your hands. But as soon as sweet Jungkook noticed your state, he offered you a hand and somehow ended up helping through your multiple data collecting trips that afternoon. It was a nice day.

“Anytime” he took the can in his hands with a shy look on his face. “Unless I’m practicing, you know…” you look down at his feet, with huge black boots engulfing them, and you smile due to their contrast with his personality. “Here, i’ll give you my number so you can call me whenever you need to put all those papers back. Hopefully I’ll be around” he added as he pulled his phone from his back pocket.

Way to get a girl’s number, my god.

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yanderenightmare · 4 years

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yandere ! BNHA headcannons

SLEEPING HABITS

Support me at KO-FI if you feel like it<3

goodiebag WARNINGS: dubcon, noncon, yandere, abuse, profanity, anxiety, arson, kidnapping, Stockholm syndrome, manipulation, mind control

BAKUGO KATSUKI - KACHAN

Bakugo respects sleep to the point of obsession. Always in bed before eight thirty, and though the thought of railing his little darling into the mattress is always a tempting thought, a long day of hero-work almost always calls for cuddles and sleep and nothing more and nothing less. He’s just so tired once he comes home, all sweaty and coated in smog with only one petite little gorgeous thing on his mind. He scarcely takes a shower before heading to bed, coming in through the door, grabbing his little darling wherever she is, whatever she’s doing going to waste or having to wait until the morning again, because there’s no chance in either heaven or hell she’s escaping what lock she’s been secured in under Bakugo’s arms, making quick work of shedding all clothes and brushing his teeth harshly in bare-minimum war-like effort, before scooping her up in his arms and collapsing in the bed with a bounce and a much needed groan.

He’ll have her on her side, spooning her, squeezing the breath from out of her lungs, his heavy heartbeats crashing and wreaking havoc through her ribs, hand harshly gripping onto her hip, pushing her ass firmly against his crotch, hissing each time she makes a move. This is how it always goes, every night, no exceptions. She’ll always be locked and pushed to his chest, guarding her as though he’s a dragon protecting his treasure. His breaths wafting close to her ear, those heavy growling huffs making her heart catch in her throat. He’ll breath in the scent of her hair, loving how flowery and serene her scent is as opposed to the smell of smoke and caramel. Finding it a perfect aroma to fall asleep to, pleasant dreams conjured by the associations it provides.

DABI - TODOROKI TOUYA

Dabi can’t go to sleep without some sugar. But he too can come home tired after having over-exerted himself with the use of his blue flames, therefor sex isn’t always in the deck of cards for his darling once he comes home. Though, if she thinks she’s off the hook, she’s mistaken, there will be no sleep until he’s satisfied. He’s a selfish asshole about it too, pulling her up and his chest, hands cradling her ass, pinching the soft plump flesh as he makes her grind on him, his tongue and teeth coming to mark-up that pretty soft neck of hers, her soft timid whimpers enough to make him groan, wild energy surging through his loins, perhaps enough to persuade him in ripping those little panties off her anyways.

Afterwards he’ll be lying on his back, having her lie halfway on his chest. One hand stroking with slender fingers up and down her sides, loving how her goosebumps never fail in greeting him. On those days he wants more contact, he’ll swing her leg up over his torso, hand holding onto her ass-cheek, pulling her some further onto his chest. His heart fluttering in gratification as her small hands come to trace his itching aching scars, those careful curious blossom-tipped fingertips dancing over his marred skin, goosebumps of his own flushing the surface in reverence. His spine shivering as he falls ever so softly into sweet-dream sleep.

SHIGARAKI TOMURA

Tomura’s sleep habit is sporadic, but despite being tired, his boyish horniness always outweighs his need for sleep. Actually, he finds he sleeps even better after having pumped what frustration the day had given him into his poor little darling. Having her jump up and down the length of his cock, or humping her silly into the mattress. However, he always prepares her first, loving to feel her quivering little thighs locked and spread with his face buried in what sweetness found between them, gorging himself in exploring what places has his darling going cross-eyed. His hungry-hearted curiosity making quick work of finding out which way to curl and scissor his fingers when burying his digits knuckle-deep inside her, feeling her spongy walls clench and flutter about him until her juices drip shamefully down his hand, a cocky smile stretched upon his face as he kisses her stomach. Her prepared slicked-up wet and velvety walls so eager to suck in his cock, the fluttering feel of her walls kissing his girth enough to have his toes cramping and eyes going wild.

He’ll be exhausted afterwards, and clingy, cradling her chest like a toddler. His face using her chest like a pillow, hand squeezing and tweaking at her nipple as though it were some plushie for him to drool over. His foot coming to cuddle and snake with hers until he feels perfectly comfortable. Snores quickly following suit as well as a satiated blissful smile stretched upon his face.

SHINSO HITOSHI

Nothing can help Hitoshi’s darling from doing whatever he wants, however he wants it, whenever he wants it. No amount of groveling, begging, pleading, crying, screaming will stop him. And, although he comes home multiple times throughout the day, having subjugated his darling to his will again and again for several hours on end, sex is still mandatory before she’s allowed to sleep. He’ll laugh as he clutches her mind in a choke-hold, having her focus on every single little movement he makes, making her tremble upon every feather-light touch he bestows upon her, watching her eyes wrench shut upon every vein and bump and ridge as he pinches her clit between his callous fingers, watching as she loses count of how many times he’s made her cum in the span of the mere last hour.

He’ll be a real cocky, manipulative, degrading asshole during their entire play-session, but when it comes to cuddles he’ll wipe the shit-eating grin off his face and kiss her temple softly, stroking and petting her hair as he whispers sweet little nothings into her ear. Still a smidge of cockiness evident in his otherwise awe-struck tone. Limbs flung over and under each other, thoroughly entangled in an intricate and comfortable knot, coated with sweat. He’ll release whatever hold he had on her mind once their done, happy to see her comfort herself in his chest, soft sighs sounding from her small frame, in contrast to watching her pathetically try and snake her way from out of his hold.

TAKAMI KEIGO - HAWKS

Poor darling. She’s lucky she can still stand on some days throughout the week. Praying, wishing and screaming at whomever might be listening, whomever might be in charge of her fate other than Keigo has become like ritual before going to bed. Her prayers are never answered though. It’s a cruel joke, a game, a satire, some form of heaven yet some form of hell. How he comes to her in the shape of an angel, similar to the ones she’s been praying to, only he answers her prayers in whichever way he wants. He’ll have her for hours on end in prayer stance, kneeling, clinging to him as though he were a life-line. He’ll have her slipping in and out of consciousness, with his almighty hands guiding her every movement where she’s grown too tired to do as much as lift a finger in protest, where all that leaves her mouth are cute incomprehensible sounds.

But even he gets exhausted after a while, after a long, long while of snapping his hips forward, jutting into his poor little baby-bird. Sometimes, if he still has the energy, he’ll lay them both in the bath, message whatever strain gathered in her shoulders away, have her melt against him, but on most days: he’ll simply wrap both his wings around her sweat-slicked glowing dewy body, inhale the sweet scent of their love and nuzzle into her neck, whisper small cooing praises and adorations, holding onto her as though she’s absolution, drifting off to sleep while feeling the spontaneous remnants of himself spasm and jolt through her.

MIDORIYA IZUKU - DEKU

Izuku uses everything with purpose, as a lesson, as a reminder, as a threat, as a weapon. Sex is no exception. Does his little darling not understand her place, he’ll gladly teach her. Does his little darling forget who she belongs to, he’ll gladly remind her. Does his little darling think she can leave, does she think she can survive on her own, does she really think she’ll breath better without him? She’ll soon be preaching otherwise while clamping down around the girth of his cock, with his swollen cockhead kissing her cervix each time he pushes into her. He’ll have her screaming, crying, begging for forgiveness, and being the forgiving hero that he is, he’ll allow her rest if she tells him one more time what she’s done wrong and make him believe that she’ll never do something like it ever again through promise upon promise upon tearful promise.

He’ll allow her rest when he’s convinced she’s learned her lesson, where after he’ll always draw a bath before sleeping, carrying her to the water and letting her soak while he changes the bedsheets. He’ll be sweet then, still stern and domineering and intimidating, but refraining from being harsh and brute and cruel. He’ll have her lying on his chest every night, legs secured between his, large hands propping her into position if she slides off or tries shifting, having her ask for permission to leave the bed to do simple things such as using the bathroom. His hand running through her hair, large enough to capture her entire skull in his palm, enough to make her fear sleeping yet enough to make her feel lonely when she wakes up without him.

CHISAKI KAI - OVERHAUL

On days where Kai is content, or at least something akin to the feeling, all he wants is to cherish sweet moments with his darling. Soft-tinted cuddles in bed where silence is a type of peace that makes his soul feel light like dandelion-fluff. But, days where the hours has spared Kai of the worlds ugliness, sickness and depravity are few and far between. Meaning, it’s not often he comes home content. And when he’s aggravated, when everything feels sporadic and irate and static and like pure and utter chaos, there’s only one thing that can make him feel collected again, like he’s in charge, in control, and that’s having his little darling beneath him with his cock tearing through her, it’s seeing those gorgeous watery eyes look up at him through a thick veil of plead, it’s having her innocence wrapped around his fingers.

It’s soothing, though it looks like punishment, though it looks like torture, it’s the only way he can find peace. Afterwards, lying face to face, tangled together, limbs an artwork of intense and passionate knotwork, his shallow breaths turning to long-felt satisfied inhales and exhales. Feeling the cleanliness of her trembling flesh beneath his fingertips, having her small breakable defenseless body tight against his, the drums of her heartbeats dancing against the thunder-claps residing in his own chest, droplets of tears hanging off her eyelashes as her gem-like orbs look up at him, his hand on her waist. It’s reassuring knowing that perfection still exists in a world devoid of order.

TODORKI SHOTO

Shoto would play all day everyday if he could, but he can’t, which makes the pressure on those hours in which he can play that much more crucially vital. Yet, knowing what’s to come doesn’t mean his darling ever knows what to expect when the night conquers the sky. She’ll be counting the seconds until she hears the front-door unlock, the click sending gunshots to ricochet through her ribs. She’ll hear his booted footsteps on the stone-floors, notice her breathing turning grim and shallow, feeling the beating pitter pattering of her heart in her head, and then she’ll feel him outside the conjuring of her own fears, she’ll feel his slender petal-veined finger gliding up her leg or shoulder, tangling in her hair, his firm lips pressing softly against her forehead, her crippling fear and the rushing of blood boiling past her ears rendering all sounds incomprehensible.

Her mind knows what to expect, what to dread, what to prepare for, but her body never seems to learn. He’ll bite, he’ll claw, he’ll strangle, long digits curling and scissoring in places too deep for her to ever even dream of reaching. Cold then hot then cold and hot or hot and cold or frostbitten and boiling. She always falls asleep with a fever. Cradled and comforted in the same arms that caused her unraveling, her eyes opium-blown as she stares blankly up at him, falling deeper and drowning in chromatic galaxies. Her whole body cold and sweat-slicked and breathless and overwhelmed with Shoto’s inescapable embrace, whether she’s lying beneath him or on top of him or curled up against his chest, she’s not allowed to breath her own air when with him.

Support me at KO-FI if you feel like it<3

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mariusroyale · 3 years

Note

You better give us some headcanons on the crew /j

Unless-

uh hah ha-

LESSS GOOOO

Kwazii:

- what’s the bet he watches and rewatches pirates of the Caribbean

- he’s littered with scars! battle scars he calls em and it stresses out peso bc he doesn’t WANT MORE SCARS ON HIM

- i hc him as bi! he just radiates bi energy to me-

- he blinks slow around peso :>>

- has used his claws to pick locks before!

- kwaso bc duh- he loves rubbing his face against pesos like he can’t help it he jus HAS to bc he loves him sm

- this is sort of canon already but he can’t go a minute without jumping or doing front flips anywhere like he GAHTTA MOVE

- when he’s thoroughly spooked he’ll jump extra high and cling onto the ceiling like in those cartoons akdjdkdh

Peso:

- often studies when he’s not busy!! gotta know more abt how to help sea creatures he hasn’t encountered yet after all

- sings/chirps when he’s v v happy

- FLAPS when he’s happy too hahdkfjd

- i think he’d like watching medical dramas! probably me projecting but i like them

- WHAT IF HES INTO KDRAMAS (ive only gotten into one but that hc is cute ahehsj)

- loves listening to kwazii’s stories!! (this is already canon basically (cough cough, that snail ep in season 5))

- I’d like to think he preens sometimes! just sorta fixing up his feathers and some (kwazii) of the crew are like ‘why are u stabbing urself’

- is a super fast swimmer! this is already confirmed p much but like HELLA FAST

Barnacles:

- enjoys listening to classical music

- also SOME HARD ROCK IF HES FEELING IT

- is BEEG LIKE 🅱️EEG 🅱️EEFY 🅱️OLAR 🅱️EAR

- could sometimes act like captain holt in my version of the crew!

- and by that i mean he sees kwazii as a son and would die for him (not if i die for u first captain!)

- when really really tired (as in u can’t save him with coffee) he’ll just blabber abt how much he treasures the crew and how much he’ll do for them

- sometimes he doesn’t get enough sleep! (like tweak-) and peso as his doctor has to keep him in check cos like yeah captain ur strong as shit but ur still old!!!

- his teefs are super fuckin S H A R P like sometimes when he needs a knife or maybe scissors he’ll just *SLICE*

- he’s obviously a huge softie but man this guy is SUCH a cutie patootie id imagine if he was in a relationship he’d be nonstop affection and all that

- speaking OF affection, he’ll pull kwazii into these big ass BEAR HUGS bc augwh he loves this cat so much “my SO N” “CAP LOOSEN IT A LITTLE IM A BIT SQUISHED-“

- bad at cooking but delights in watching cooking shows from time to time

- probably watches bob ross

- ohhhhh my god he could totally be an artist n stuff

Shellington:

- this one’s so stupid but, tweak and kwazii keep giggling whenever they make him say ‘LAWRENCE CHANEY’ KAHAKAHDS

- I’d like to think he tries to learn new languages too!

- falls asleep at his desk sometimes and one of the crew either carries him to bed or puts a blanket over him

- tries his hand at cooking with his children the vegimals! does not work out well he’s a disaster

- enjoys watching stuff on YouTube! u decide what youtubers he watches

- could hc him as ace!

- does that thing and eats ice

- he’s a lanky guy but almost reaches the captains height in my version

Dashi:

- sometimes when she’s really really frustrated she’ll just accidentally bark and she’ll just be like “😳 my bad-“

- when she’s particularly delirious (exhaustion, probably) she’ll chase her tail

- when she gets really excited her tail will wag really really fast

- adjdk sometimes when she’s super hungry she’ll skip chewing food and just I N H A L E (re: does not bode well when it’s noodles)

- sometimes she’ll just sleep in weird ass positions, neck tilted n all that

- loves dressing up tweak sometimes when she’s comfy with it (gives her her own stylish tomboy fits and stuff)

- LOOOOVES the barbie movies god she grew up on them and sometimes she’ll just watch fashion fairytale or princess charm school

- forces koshi to watch them too (she also loves them)

- visibly winces when kwazii tries mimicking her Aussie (tho it sounds p kiwi to me) accent

- probably watches drag race

Tweak:

- watches game grumps ajdjd

- sometimes gets too loud in her room when playing games cos she’ll get mad n shit

- “GODDDDAAMMIT I WAS SO CLOSE TO COMPLETING IT”

“TWEAK PLEASE ITS 2 AM GO TO SLEEP”

- sometimes she’ll just. eat leaves (even when they’re just on land in the wild if she knows it’s safe she’ll just. *nom*)

- goes NUTS whenever she makes blueprints that are like, detachable parts of a gup that are also modes of transport like she loves that the gup k and gup q

- like making it she’s like “HOHOHOJOUO WE GETTIN FUNKY WITH IT TONIGHT BOIZ” and it’s midnight and ‘bois’ is herself

- wants to redesign the gup f! ofc it was dodgy and is now a teeny artificial reef but she wants to make a new one that looks like the design she wanted initially !! (clownfish im p sure at least)

- her and kwazii get up to stupid shit in my version, assuming it doesn’t harm her gups or other creations

- when she’s pissed off/frustrated, she’ll tap her foot really quick repeatedly

- and while her ears twirl around each other when she’s scared, her nose also twitches!

#octonauts #kwazii #peso #captain barnacles #shellington #dashi #tweak #kwazii kaczkowski #peso packton #captain pietro barnacles #pietro barnacles #shellington sullivan #dashi dixon #tweak burkes #headcanons #octonauts headcanons #didn’t have any for inkling bc.#i ran out of brain

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calpops · 4 years

Text

seven days | c.h.

Your baby is born two months early. You and Calum face the complications and uncertainties with each other and the help of family.

10k words

dates with cal masterlist

<< >>

Calum’s world spins in slow motion. He sees you but you’re out of focus, his vision is hazy past tears. He’s numb but somehow he can still make out that your hand is in his, your grip is like iron, the hold you have on each other is unbreakable. He can hear static, white noise tumbles through his senses raised into a panic induced overdrive. He loses you and finds your baby and wonders why there’s no crying. The doctor has her in her arms and she’s saying something, Calum can see that her lips are moving but his mind can’t keep up, her voice is lost to him. Neither of you were prepared for this, the classes and books neglected to ready you for only seven months of pregnancy, ten minutes of labor and the doctor rushing your daughter out of the room. He looks back at you and sees your once outstretched arm fall, your lip quiver, eyes go wild through your weary and worried exhaustion. Your voice finally breaks him.

“Follow them,” you plead and though Calum wants to stay with you there’s someone else in the world who needs him too. Someone else he wants to be with just as much as you.

With every footstep down the sterile hallway he wishes your hand could still be in his. He’s stopped short, a nurse he barely recognizes from his disconnect while at your side stands in front of him.

“They’re bringing her to the NICU,” the nurse says and though her voice and eyes are kind Calum feels fear and frustration rising inside of him, boiling and breaking him as she stands in his way. “You can’t go in yet.”

“What—I’m—she’s my daughter,” he stumbles out, throat on fire and eyes burning just the same.

“They’re getting her in an incubator. She needs oxygen and vital care,” she says and goes on to explain it will take a bit of time. “When she’s ready you’ll be able to go in. You’ll need to scrub up and wash your hands first.”

Calum shakes his head, not quite able to process all of this information on the spot. He lets out a shaky breath, curls his fingers into his palms, feels the coolness of his wedding ring on his skin and it reminds him of you; he lets the thought of you attempt to calm him. His head shake turns to a nod though he’s still not sure he can completely comprehend all that is happening.

“When can I see her?” he finally manages to get out though it’s not without a fight or a broken syllable.

“Follow me,” the nurse offers and without thinking Calum is walking down the hallway again, trailing the nurse to a break in the white wall where a window rests. “You can watch from here.”

The view is startling. Machines and equipment line the NICU, doctors and nurses pass in and out and create fears with every step they take. It takes a moment to find the team that delivered your baby, joined by a few new nurses and another doctor. Just past the crowd he can see the incubator and your daughter being settled within, tubes for oxygen and the like disguising her small face. Her eyes are closed and though she looks peaceful the striking contrast of your sleeping daughter and the dire circumstances are enough to choke Calum. He can’t watch the rest, his eyes skirt to the floor but he stays put. He’s not leaving her, his resolve is shaken but stays intact. He wants you with him, he wants her to be on the other side of the glass, in his arms, welcomed to a world without complications.

Time passes in a blur, his eyes fixed on his shoes and the tile floor below. He’s vaguely aware of other people in the hallway. Doctors, parents, nurses and patients all pass him by without a word. The kind nurse is long gone and Calum finds himself wishing he had asked more questions. The silence is deafening. He wants to have your whispered words of reassurance in his ear. He wants the repeated mantra of “it’s gonna be okay” to be believable. His phone buzzes but he doesn’t reach for it. He knows he should make calls. Tell his parents, inform the guys he left with a million questions and concerns in their minds. He doesn’t have the energy or the will to do so.

His shoulders slump but he straightens himself when a doctor approaches.

“Mr. Hood?” he asks, clipboard in hand and cool eyes sweeping him up and down. Calum nods. “You can go in now. Follow me. We have to get you ready.”

Calum’s heart lurches with the first step he takes to follow the doctor, to be with his daughter. He thinks of you, doesn’t want to imagine the panic and pain that being alone is causing you. He reminds himself Mali is with you, that you told him to follow. He’s led to a solid door and ushered through. There’s a room connected to the NICU; cabinets with scrubs and gloves and sanitizer and a medical sink claim the small space. He realizes all parents must enter through here before getting to their babies. In a blink he’s wearing a gown, and his hands are thoroughly washed. He takes just one second to take a breath, to gather courage, keep you in his thoughts and ready his heart for his daughter.

“We usually encourage skin to skin contact to bond with babies while they’re being treated. You can hold her hand, talk to her, she’ll know your voice,” the doctor explains while they approach the incubator.

There’s a thousand questions swirling through Calum’s mind that he wants to ask the doctor beside him. But his breath catches in his throat at the sight of your daughter. Her eyes are still closed from when he first caught a glimpse of her through the window. The incubator is closed, she’s surrounded by the help she needs but holes provide a place for Calum’s hand to find her. The doctor talks to him, Calum knows he should be listening but the whir of the machinery and the thumping of his pulse inside his ears drown out the words. He keeps his gaze on her, swallows back a sob and feels the ache in his heart grow as he realizes you’re alone in the room down the hall, that she’s right in front of him but they’re separated by plastic and plexiglass.

He wants to say something to her, he can’t find words, more than anything he wants to hold her. He can’t. He sinks down to level with her and slowly reaches through to lightly hold her hand that’s so small it brings tears to his eyes. She doesn’t respond but he feels better having even the smallest form of connection to her. He doesn’t even know when he realized that he was right; your baby is the most beautiful little girl he’s ever seen. Your bet is meaningless, winning and names are lost in the plight of life. The doctor leaves eventually but hospital staff still surrounds the NICU, nurses and doctors ready at a moment’s notice. It’s silent save for the hum of the machines. Only a few other babies are being treated, spaced out to afford families privacy. He doesn’t know how long he stays bent over with his hand lightly on hers before he finally finds words.

“We love you,” he tells her, knowing if you were with them you’d say it too.

It might have been minutes but is more likely hours by the time a nurse pulls Calum from her side. The mention of you finally rousing him from his state. He doesn’t want to leave but he wants you. He wars over it for a moment but nods, gives her hand another touch, tells her that you both love her and finds himself wandering the hallway back to you. You’re stricken when he enters the room. Mali is trying to be a calming presence, to keep you in bed, but it seems a losing fight.

“How is she?” you ask, breathless, hopeless and forlorn.

Calum swallows down a lump in his throat, bites back tears and tries to stay strong for you and for her. A rush of the doctor’s words come back to him. What scattered remnants of pieces he barely heard charge through.

“She’s beautiful,” Calum says first, sits down in the chair at your side and takes your hand as softly as he had taken hers. “The doctor said the first twenty four hours are the most vital. They’ll know more at forty eight and even more at seventy two.”

“I want to see her,” you say and Calum hears the edge of hysteria in your tone.

“You need to rest,” Mali tries but falls short when you and Calum both shake your heads.

“I didn’t even get to hold her,” you cry and it’s enough to bring Calum to you, his arms gently around your shoulders. You can’t hold her, he can’t hold her, but you can hold each other and hope. “I want to see her,” you repeat and the words hit Calum’s skin and wrench his heart.

“We’ll ask the doctor if you can,” he promises, not knowing how physically affected you are from labor, not knowing if getting up and going would be okay or not.

“I’ll go get her,” Mali says and excuses herself from the room to track down the doctor and to give you two a private moment.

You’re both quiet for a few seconds, content to hold each other together in the silence. Calum feels your grip on him tighten as you shift in the hospital bed and eventually pull away so he can see your face. He runs his thumbs over your cheeks to wipe away your tears.

“Are you okay?” you ask him, eyes wide and concerned. “I wish I could’ve been there with you. I don’t know how hard that must have been.”

Calum shakes his head as if he’s trying to shake away your worries. You feeling guilty for not being there with and for him was the same war he had about leaving you behind.

“‘I’m”—he says and sucks in a deep breath—“I’m okay. I’ll be okay. She’s gonna be okay,” he finishes and finds a new mantra though it’s hard to believe and each sentence sounds more like a question than the last.

You nod, a small shudder shaking your shoulders and racking your body. Calum reaches for you again, let’s his hands settle on your shoulders to give you strength and comfort.

“I know she will. She’ll be okay, she has to be, she’s half you and you’re the strongest person I know,” you rationalize, eyes lost to the wall in front of you. You look back at Calum and he sees the stony wall you’ve put up start to crack as you gaze at him. “But it’s okay to break sometimes,” you finish and Calum knows you’re saying it to him, reminding him that he can break into your arms and have you there to help him put back the pieces.

For the first time since your daughter was born Calum allows himself to crumble. The tears he’d been fighting back slide down his cheeks and his shoulders slump with the weight of the world. He’s brought back to you by your gentle pull and finds reassurance in the love you show him. Mali comes back in with the doctor and Calum tries to collect himself, wipes tears from his face and clears his throat.

“I hear you’re asking about your daughter,” the doctor says as she steps into the room and takes a sweeping glance at you, Calum and Mali. “Parents are allowed in at all times. Visiting hours for others are seven in the morning to seven at night. Only two at a time.”

“Can I go see her?” you ask, a fragment of hope clinging to your words and getting lost in your eyes at the mention of parents being allowed in whenever.

“In the morning,” the doctor replies and Calum swallows down a lump in his throat, knowing that’s not the answer you wanted. “Your labor was quick but very intense. Your body needs to rest, the drugs need to wear off, you wouldn’t make it down the hallway in your condition.”

Calum sees the refusal cross your face, the staunch disbelief that you can’t see your daughter almost enough to crack anyone’s resolve. The doctor keeps explaining to you but it falls on deaf ears and interjections. You ask if this way would be possible, if that way would, but nothing seems to be possible to the doctor who means to keep you in bed until morning.

“What if she doesn’t have a morning?” you finally ask and suck in a breath as if the words themselves strike physical pain through you. Calum’s nearly certain they did, just the thought is enough to make his chest feel like it’s caving in.

“She’s stable and comfortable. If anything was to happen we would get you in there. For now, please try to get some rest.”

The doctor gets paged and makes her escape. Calum clutches you, holds you and makes whispered promises he’s not sure can be kept.

“I don’t want her alone,” you whimper and Calum follows your gaze out the door.

“I’ll go—do you want me to stay with you? Where do you want me?” he asks, stumbling over his words, unsure where to go or what to do.

You nod. “Go be with her. Please. Make sure she’s okay,” you instruct and Calum can hear how much it pains you to let him go to her without you. He holds your hand, kisses your forehead.

“I’ll come back to check on you in a while,” he promises. “And I’ll take so many pictures of her. Sweetheart, she’s beautiful,” he adds, realizing his first time in the NICU was so filled with shock that not one photo was taken and the only time you’ve seen her was when she was being taken away.

“Thank you,” you whisper, eyes glossy. “I love you.”

“I love you,” he answers without hesitation but takes an extra second to gaze at you before heading out the door.

He’s back with your daughter before he even realizes it. Her small hand is warm inside the incubator, her eyes are still shut and past the tubes that breathe life into her she almost looks peaceful. He takes as many photos as he can without disturbing her. He settles into the hard plastic chair beside her and tilts his head back until it gently thumps against the wall. His hands find his face and rub at his jaw. He hadn’t realized before but it’s been clenched and holding tension for hours. Time passes as he sits at her side, talks to her, sings and hums when she so much as stirs slightly. He’s able to lull her and he takes those moments as victory and ones to keep with him forever. Once more he wishes you were with them, knowing you would be able to do the same for her with the sound of your voice, the gentle touch of your hand. When it nears midnight and she hasn’t stirred in a while and a nurse has come in to check on her, Calum convinces himself it’s time to go check on you.

He knows he could call or text but he misses you. He’s faced with a conundrum as he gets one foot out the door of the NICU. Now he misses her. But he doesn’t have time to do much of either as the kind nurse he recognizes from earlier stops him once more. This time she has a clipboard with papers and pen in her hand.

“Forms for her birth certificate,” she informs.

Calum gapes at the papers. Even the easiest of questions and information seems impossible. You both still don’t even know her name yet.

“You can take your time on them. I’ll be around to help if you have questions,” the nurse says before excusing herself to rush off to help another patient.

Calum’s left with the clipboard in hand, aches in his heart and questions in his mind. He heads back for your room to find you awake and Mali gone. You smile to greet him but Calum can see how flat the gesture is and he can’t blame you.

“Where’s Mali?”

“Getting a coffee. I can’t sleep and she wanted to stay up with me,” you explain and Calum settles himself on the edge of your bed. He takes your hand and places the clipboard on his lap. “What’s that?”

“Forms for her birth certificate,” he says and sighs. “I can’t even fill in her name.”

You squeeze his hand in understanding. “Do what you can,” you reply and inch closer to take a peek at the papers. There’s a moment of silence between the two of you as you each get lost in your own thoughts. “I know you get to name her…”

Calum shakes his head. All bets off. “We’ll decide on something together. I love all the ones on your list,” he tells you and finally gets a genuine smile from you, eyes alight and all.

“I want to see her before we choose, I feel like I don’t even know her.”

Calum trembles at your words and the honesty in them. You carried her for seven months and had about seven seconds to see her before she was carried off. He leans closer to you, gives you many small kisses from your cheek to forehead as worries and fears tumble inside him, each one coming to life and bringing life to others. He drowns them out, for you and for her. He’s already crumbled once. He wants to be resilient. Mali comes back with coffee in hand and tired eyes but such a sheer will to stay Calum can’t even work up the nerve to even suggest she go home and get some sleep. And in all honesty he’s glad she’s here and can be there with you when he can’t.

“I called mum and dad, I hope you don’t mind,” Mali says when she takes a seat on the opposite side of you, sliding into the chair in a tired yet graceful way.

Calum shakes his head. He doesn’t mind at all. He wanted to do it but didn’t have the heart or the words or the right mind to even dial the phone.

“They’re flying out as soon as they can,” Mali further informs, then sips at her coffee. “We’re all gonna be here for you. Both of you. All of you.”

“Thank you,” Calum gets out past a choked up throat and stands to stride to his sister and give her a long overdue hug. She affords him comfort and when she realizes how tired his eyes are she gives him her coffee and says she’ll get another.

Mali leaves again and Calum spends the next few minutes drinking in the caffeine and soaking up some time with you. He wants to get back to your daughter but the war of you being completely alone confronts him once more. He decides to wait until Mali gets back to head back to the NICU. When she does stride back through the door he gives you a kiss, tells you he loves you and makes a promise to stay with her until morning; until you can be with her too.

He spends the night in the uncomfortable hospital chair, hand inside the incubator, finger lightly stroking her tiny hand in soothing rhythms. He talks to her when the moon is out, he shows her pictures of you and doesn’t let it bother him when her eyes don’t stay open for long. He comes to terms with the fact that she’s resting and when she’s resting she’s getting stronger each and every second. Through the night he shifts in the chair but never leaves it. There’s a kink in his neck and his muscles ache by the time morning comes but those pains are minimal in comparison. He rubs at his tired eyes after waking from a miraculous little doze. He straightens and finds her immediately.

“Good morning,” he sings quietly as he gets level with her. Her eyes are barely open. “You get to see your mommy today.”

He knows it’s not likely, probably impossible, but he swears she smiles when he tells her that. His phone buzzes in his pocket. He has no intention of answering it—he’s surprised it still has enough charge to buzz—but he checks who’s calling. Ashton lights up the screen. Calum sends him to voicemail and jumps when motion in his peripheral startles him. Ashton is standing outside the NICU window, looking in at Calum with his phone pressed to his ear. He frowns when he hears the voicemail greeting. Calum gathers up the courage to leave his daughter. He gives her a small goodbye squeeze on her hand, tells her he loves her and exits the NICU, the routine of leaving the used gown behind already set in stone.

“How is she?” Ashton asks, giving no time or thought to explaining how he knew where to go or why he holds a duffel bag in his grip.

Calum wracks his brain, trying to find the last update from a nurse or doctor but comes up short after his long night. He sighs and his shoulders slump.

“She made it through the night,” he says and hears the desperate intone of needing hope in his voice. “What are you doing here? How’d you know?”

“Mali texted, Luke has Duke,” Ashton explained and lifted a worry from Calum. He’d nearly forgotten Duke in the fray of it all. Ashton hoisted the duffel bag up. “I brought you both clothes, phone chargers, and I even have a present for her,” he continues and rummages around in a small gift bag until he pulls out a plush koala bear.

“She’s in a closed incubator,” Calum says though he knows he should be saying thank you instead. He can’t stop the words once they start. “She can’t have anything in there.”

Ashton nods, knowing the slight bite in Calum’s tone is not frustration at the gesture, just the circumstances. “It can go in her nursery.”

“We don’t even have it set up yet.”

Calum knows he’s starting to crack again but he doesn’t know how to stop himself. If it were anyone else he might have had a fighting chance of keeping himself together but Ashton’s been there for unspeakable highs and lows. He can’t fight himself into submission. He can’t keep himself together without a little help from his best friend. That’s exactly what he gets, a comforting hand on his back as the bags hit the floor and a hug to remind him that it’s not just you and him against the world. It takes a few minutes for Calum to pull himself together, to offer an apology for his tone that Ashton shrugs off in understanding and head for your room, the sudden remembrance that you get to finally see your daughter carrying his steps.

He finds you and Mali in the same spots as last night. He can tell you didn’t sleep. Your eyes are bloodshot and heavy but the smallest of smiles captures your lips when you see him.

“You ready?” Calums asks and you nod, needing no other prompting to understand. “Let’s get you dressed then we can go,” he adds on and searches through the duffel bag for some clothes as Ashton and Mali head to the hallway.

“How was last night?” you ask him as you pull a hoodie on.

“Long,” Calum answers and takes a breath. “But she made it through with no problems. I talked about you, showed her pictures, I think she’s excited.”

You laugh at Calum’s recount of the night and his projection of her possible excitement. It’s the first time he’s heard you laugh in nearly twenty four hours. It’s not as hearty and joyous as usual but it’s a start to feeling normal. You both hold onto that feeling as you exit the room and head to get ready for the NICU.

Calum doesn’t know what to expect when you enter and see her for the first time since she was taken away. He figures you might tear up, that you might clutch him or go straight for her. He doesn’t expect you to freeze in your tracks halfway to where she sleeps. He doesn’t know what to do when you wrap your arms around yourself and tremble where you stand.

“It’s okay, sweetheart, come on,” he tries with a soothing voice. He’s a step ahead of you and you continue to stand still. He backtracks to you, puts a reassuring hand on your back. “What’s going on?”

He focuses on the subtleties of your face and is drawn to your eyes. He sees the way they shine and knows that you’ll soon be biting your lip and scrunching your nose as you do your best to hold back your emotions.

“All these machines…” you trail off with eyes roaming the NICU and the sight of dozens of incubators and the like. Calum knows how overwhelming it is but he’s had time to adjust and get used to the hum and flow of the world your daughter lives in.

“They keep the babies safe and comfortable,” he says, knowing that’s what will get through to you. “I’ll show you, she’s nice and cozy, getting stronger every second.”

You nod and take very small steps with Calum at your side. He doesn’t rush you or push you along. He goes at your pace, his eyes skirting from you to your daughter. He knows you can see her from your vantage point. Her eyes are closed as sleep claims her once more. Calum is used to the tubes that give her oxygen and help sustain her life. It startles you when you first approach and Calum witnesses the tears that finally slide down your cheeks. You’re timid at the edge of the incubator, hands curled into fists and steadfast at your sides. He hears your breath shaking and reaches for your hand.

“You can touch her. Hold her hand. She likes that,” Calum informs, knowing his touch and voice had soothed her through the night whenever she stirred. “Like this,” he says and reaches his free hand toward her, lightly stroking the soft skin on the back of her hand. Her eyes open but she stays calm and content.

You go slowly, as if afraid to startle her or scare yourself. Calum retracts his hand from her but keeps his other in yours for support and comfort. It takes one touch for your fears and stone wall to come crumbling down. Your eyes soften as more tears make stride and a sob wracks your body.

“Hi, sweetheart,” you manage to get out through a cracked voice and Calum smiles at the choice of term of endearment. You’ve always been his sweetheart, now you have one of your own. You look up at your husband and Calum meets your eyes. “She looks just like you.”

Calum shakes his head. “She’s you too, look,” Calum says.

You giggle through another cry but Calum knows the tears and sobs are all born of something good. “She’s got your eyes and purses her lips just like you.”

Calum smiles at that. “But that nose and those cheeks are all you.”

“You think so?” you ask, turning away from her to look at Calum with hope in your eyes. He nods. You turn back to look at her and keep up the small rhythm you have of stroking her hand. “Yeah,” you agree upon further inspection with such adoration in your tone it makes Calum laugh.

For as hesitant as you were to enter the NICU it quickly becomes apparent that nothing in the world will tear you from her side. You take up residence in the chair Calum spent the night in, never once letting your hand leave her, keep your voice soothing as you talk to her. Calum finds his way to the other side, content to hold her other hand and listen to the sweet words you whisper to her.

“I love you so much,” you repeat, having found a new mantra. “I can’t wait to bring you home. You’ll get to meet your auntie Mali, grandma and grandpa, all your uncles. Your doggie, Duke. We’re all waiting for you, whenever you’re ready.”

“Some are less patient than others,” Calum says around a laugh as he spies two people on the other side of the window. You make a confused noise until Calum motions over to the window and you both take in the sight of Ashton and Mali waving behind the glass with glossy eyes and smiles to accompany them.

“They’re really special, huh?” you ask and smile, appreciative for all of the effort they’ve put in. You both know you wouldn’t be able to get through this without family by your side.

“The best,” Calum agrees with fond eyes.

You fall into silence, content to stay by her side and do nothing but gaze at her and each other adoringly. Calum doesn’t expect to look up and find you in tears again but he does and it nearly rips his breath away before he detects that though you’re crying it’s a good kind of cry this time.

“What’s going on, sweetheart?” he asks.

“This is just—it’s all I’ve wanted,” you manage to get out with your gaze roaming from her to Calum and then to Ashton and Mali still watching from the window. “It’s our family.”

Calum smiles at the sentiment and the honesty in your voice and knows the gesture reaches his eyes and hopes you can feel it in your heart the way he does. He knows your rocky relationship with your parents and that you haven’t felt like family in a long time. They have still yet to meet Calum after bailing on a dinner and the wedding. He’s not sure if you’ve called them about the birth or if they even bothered to answer but he’s happy to see you content with the family that chose you.

You sniffle and meet eyes with Calum. “I have an idea for her name,” you announce and Calum’s heart skips a beat. He’s ready to start calling her by her name, to fill out the forms in his hoodie pocket, but then he laughs as he realizes he might more often than not call her a term of endearment, just like he does with you.

“Anything you want,” Calum promises, knowing that it will be perfect because it came from you and your heart.

***

Another day slips by and Calum finds himself alone with your daughter once more. You’ve been brought back to your hospital room to talk with your doctor and see where you’re at and when you’ll be ready to be discharged. Calum asks you to get some rest while you’re in there. You make no promises but heed his words. You both have thoughts of her name in your heads, still undecided, wanting more time with her to be absolutely sure but feeling that it could be right. Calum’s hanging on by a thin and tattered thread. He’s exhausted and nodding off in the chair when Ashton rouses him with a phone call and coaxes him out into the hall, but not before he spends the time to tell her that he loves her. He meets his best friend in the hall, a yawn falling from him, arms wide as they stretch out the aches and tightness from his prolonged position.

Calum rubs at his eyes. “Why’d you drag me out here?”

“I think you should go home for a while,” Ashton says, getting straight to the point. When Calum immediately refuses with a shake of his head Ashton sighs and continues, “just a little while. You’re running on empty.”

“No. No, I don’t want to leave her. I can’t leave them,” Calum refuses, head still shaking and eyes darting to the window.

“Go home. Take a shower. Eat something. Take half an hour to sleep. They need you to be rested,” Ashton says and Calum can almost hear the words he didn’t say. They need you to be strong.

It’s the implication and words unsaid that even marginally make Calum consider the proposition. He runs a hand through his hair as tangles of thoughts snarl through his mind. He lets out an accidentally long held breath and turns the shake of his head into a nod as his shoulders relax. He decides he will, but only after he’s sure you’re okay and can be in with her. He tells Ashton as much.

“Good, I’m on shift right now so I can be in there with them when you’re gone if you guys want,” Ashton informs. Mali had finally gone home to get some rest for herself and Ashton slid seamlessly into her role at your sides to fill in the gaps when you have to be separated.

“I’m sure we’d all love that,” Calum assures, utterly grateful for his family’s presence.

Ashton does as promised. Calum watches as the two of you enter the NICU, sticks by the window until he sees Ashton take her hand for the first time and glow with such love and adoration it makes Calum certain she’s okay in his hands. And yours, though he’s never had a doubt about that. He heads home after waving and blowing a kiss—and laughing when Ashton pretends to snag it from you and keep it for himself. He calls for a car, knowing he’s well past exhausted and being behind the wheel would be dangerous. The car stops at the curb of your home and Calum stops short when he steps out. Two cars sit in the driveway where your cars are usually parked.

He enters the house and is met with disgruntled noises coming from down the hall. He makes way to the back room and finds Luke and Michael in a mess of boxes and half put together nursery furniture. He laughs as he stands in the doorway and it catches his friends attention, they look up at him, wide eyed and startled.

Michael is the first to stand as he abandons a screwdriver on the floor among the mess of cardboard, bubble wrap, and probably unread instructions. “How is she? How are you? What are you doing here?”

“She’s getting better everyday,” Calum answers and doesn’t even question the knowledge they have of her and the troubles she’s been facing. He knows Ashton must have filled them in. “Ashton forced me home to get some rest. But the better question is what are you two doing here?”

Luke blows out an irritated breath. “Trying to build her nursery. We figured Mali and Ash wouldn’t be leaving anytime soon so we might as well be helpful in the meantime.”

“Do they know when she can come home?” Michael asks and tucks his hands in his pockets, eyes sweeping the mess of a nursery. He clears his throat.

“Not yet. Hopefully soon,” Calum answers with an arched eyebrow, also taking in the room.

Luke stands. “Don’t worry. We set up a bassinet by your bed. We read it’s good for newborns to sleep near their parents. Just in case,” Luke informs. “She’ll have somewhere to come home to and rest. Now it’s your turn,” he finishes and waves a hand as if to dismiss Calum from their presence.

“Alright, I’ll take the hint. Just… try not to break anything,” Calum says and excuses himself to head across the hall to his own room. He spots the bassinet immediately and gravitates towards it without thinking. He has the stuffed koala Ashton got for her in his hoodie pocket. He pulls it out and places it inside, optimistic that she’ll be able to come home to it soon.

Calum doesn’t linger at home too long. He showers, eats and struggles to sleep for a while. Luke and Michael make minimal progress in their efforts to put together the nursery. Before heading out again Calum stops by to thank them.

“We couldn’t do this without you guys,” Calum expresses his thanks and means every word of it.

“That’s what we’re here for. It’s what families do,” Luke reassures.

“You can thank us by showing us some pictures of her,” Michael states and tilts his head. “The only ones we’ve gotten are blurry and through a window from Ash and Mali.”

Calum is more than happy to comply, he’s taken dozens, likely hundreds, since the first one he snapped for you. With two of his best friends by his side he swipes through endless photos. Most of just her, nearly identical, some with you and her, some of him and her and a few taken by a nice nurse of the two of you with her. He’s not looking at Luke and Michael—much too busy staring at the screen, wanting to be back with her and you to look at them—but he can feel the smiles in their voices.

“She’s the prettiest little thing I’ve ever seen,” Luke coos.

Michael makes a comment that she’s lucky she favors you over Calum and all three laugh. It’s one of few genuine laughs Calum has had over the past few days and even though it’s at his own expense he doesn’t mind. It feels normal. Michael and Luke aren’t treating him like glass and he feels less likely to shatter because of it.

“I gotta get back to her,” Calum concludes and locks his phone after the last photo is shown.

“Send us new photos when you get there,” Luke insists and lets Calum part with them after a hug for each.

Calum leaves the half finished nursery and hears his friends go back to squabbling.

“Where the hell did the crib go?” Michael’s voice asks as Calum heads for the door.

“I think it’s under the rocker,” Luke says. “Which is under that styrofoam.”

Calum leaves with a grin and gets back to you and her as soon as he can. He has to switch places with Ashton to get back into the NICU. He immediately greets you and her and though he’s sure at this point you both know he tells you he loves you.

“Will you sleep tonight?” Calum asks, knowing it will likely be your last night in the hospital, your visit from the doctor informing you that you could be discharged in the morning.

“No,” you respond.

“Will you at least try?” he questions with pleading eyes. He doesn’t want you to spend a night in a chair after all your body has been through though he knows you will without question. “You need rest,” he reminds. “I did. Now it’s your turn.”

You sigh and Calum can hear how tired you are just from that. You mull it over for a minute and finally nod. “I’ll try. Stay with her?”

“Always,” Calum promises and meets you around the incubator to give you a hug before separating for the night.

It’s another long and restless night for Calum but he finds small joys where he can. He’s happy to see her content and resting easily. He revels in holding her hand and talking to her. The doctor said she would know his voice and as time passes he starts to believe it. He can’t help but think back on all the times had talked to her before he was born. He found comfort in holding your bump and telling you both about his day or humming and singing familiar and beloved tunes. Those days aren’t so far gone and Calum feels a tug in his chest as he realizes how quickly they left. Seven months was too short. But as he gazes down at her he can’t help but be happy to have met her early. He laughs when the thought of her just wanting to meet you as soon as possible enters his mind and knows he’ll have to tell you that, knows it will make you smile. The night goes by without incident and it instills more and more hope into Calum’s heart that she could be going home any day now. He gets a text from you early in the morning when the sun is still making it’s ascent into the sky.

He finds himself in your hospital room with a view of pink clouds on the horizon and the golden sun greeting you as the doctor says you’re okay enough to be discharged. You both listen to the instructions and advice the doctor gives you and Calum can see the relief and happiness on your face as you settle into the realization that you can be at your daughters side at any and all times. The doctor tells you to rest and take it easy but Calum knows nothing will be restful or easy until she’s home and you both know she’s okay. Your minds and hearts won’t have peace until she can rest in your arms. Calum helps you get ready to leave your own hospital room and head back to the NICU. Over the next couple of days you and Calum find an exhausting rhythm of being at her side. It takes a lot of convincing from Ashton and Mali to let them be there for her while you take just a small amount of time for yourselves. Though it’s hard and goes against all of your instincts to be there with her at every single minute you relent after nearly thirty six hours without real sleep.

The first time you and Calum leave and Ashton and Mali go in together you linger by the window and watch as they take up positions by her sides. Calum feels warm and okay as he watches, he even manages a smile when Ashton and Mali light up when they hold her hands. The first time eases the transition to being able to take small moments away, long enough to eat and stretch your legs. But you never stay away for too long and even when they’re in with her you always find your way to passing the window and checking in on her and them. Nights are a different story. There is nothing that will make either of you leave her side. Days go on with uncertainty and worries but having Ashton and Mali around helps take some of the pressures and anxieties off of your shoulders.

Night settles upon you both with weary exhaustion clinging to your minds, bodies and hearts. Your daughter has been doing well but there’s still no word of when she can go home. It leaves you reaching for fragmented pieces of hope. Curling your fingers around broken shards of optimism and the fabric of each other’s shirts, holding onto all that is dear. Calum tries convincing you to go home for a night but you staunchly refuse, you tell him that you’re okay though your eyes betray how tired and broken you really are. He doesn’t push the matter, just holds you close in the uncomfortable hospital chair and keeps his hand on hers and yours and whispers reassurances all three of you need.

“I don’t even care if we go home soon or not. I just want to hold her,” you whisper and cut through Calum’s attempts at soothing you. “It’s been what? Four days? Five?” you ask and furrow your brows, the concept of time completely lost.

“Six,” Calum answers and is only aware of it from the watch on his wrist. It feels like a lifetime and he realizes that for her it is. He nearly gets choked up but clears his throat and blinks his eyes rapidly trying to keep himself together. He feels you shake your head against his chest as if you can’t believe it.

“She’s so tiny she could probably fit in one hand,” you say and let out a forlorn sigh. “I don’t know if we have clothes small enough for her.”

“We can send Mali out for that, I’m sure she’ll have a field day. We might have to build another closet for her,” Calum says and a small laugh follows, you giggle slightly and it’s more than Calum has let himself expect in a long while.

You lapse into silence, too tired to keep talking but too aware and afraid to fall asleep just yet. Calum’s learned to blur out the noise of the machines and just focus on your steady breathing. It comforts him. Just as he knows the beat of his heart is comforting you with your head pressed to his chest. His lap is numb but he wants you as close as possible.

“Have you thought more about her name?”

“I like what you mentioned,” Calum answers, a tilt of a smile forming for you and the thought of her possible name on his face. “Let’s sleep on it one more night,” he says and hopes that you actually will be able to sleep.

He finds himself nodding off, neck crooked and head falling against the wall behind him. But slumber is quickly taken from him when he feels himself being shaken and hears your breathy whisper.

“Something’s wrong,” you say and he immediately perks up, heart lurching and breath catching at the two words. “Look.”

You point out the window of the NICU where a group of doctors have convened with sullen looks on their faces. There’s a moment where everything is palpable and tense. Calum’s throat tightens and his heart rate spikes with anxiety. He can hear machines beeping but it’s not uncommon. The doctors break their group and start to move.

“Please don’t come in here,” he hears you say but he’s too fixed on watching the doctors disappear from the window and waiting for the door to burst open. Waiting for a doctor to take his daughter away again. “No, no, no.”

Calum’s hand finds hers and it feels just the same as always, warm and soft and perfect. His heart drops. Nothing happens, the door doesn’t open and the beeping stops. He gives it another moment and clutches at his chest with his free hand. He lets out a breath that’s nearly painful. He doesn’t even notice that in the heat of the moment you left him and stood, but now he refocuses, where once there was white edging into his vision as panic picked up he blinks it away and notices your hands are shaking. When you turn back to look at him he sees tears in your eyes.

“It’s okay,” he says and reaches a hand out to bring you back to him. “It’s okay. She’s okay.”

“I’m sorry,” you whisper and settle back against him, and he can feel the tears on your face as you find a home against the crook of his neck. “I was scared.”

“I know, it’s okay.”

“I shouldn’t have woken you. I shouldn’t have”—you begin but Calum strokes your hair and stops the words from coming out.

“That’s what I’m here for. I would’ve done the same,” he promises and assures. “She’s okay, we’re okay,” he continues when your small sobs and shakes don’t stop. He knows that you’re panic stricken and need to let the fear out. He holds you while you do, keeps his gaze flickering from you to her and lets the hum of the machines settle back in. He runs his hand up and down your back and hopes the rhythmic motion will help to calm you. He’s nearly certain sleep won’t be had any more for the night, he’s been running on coffee, anxiety, naps and adrenaline for days now. Once you’re calmed, or at least calmer, you pull away from Calum and he watches as you move back to her, settle so you can hold her hand and whisper to her. Her eyes are open and she’s calm. Calum notes and realizes how quiet she is, has been since she was first born. Even her cries are small and timid. He listens to you tell her that you both love her, that you can’t wait to bring her home and promise to always be there for her. Once the panic flees you both settle back in for the night but stay awake with closed eyes and hands on hers.

Morning comes in a slow creeping way. Doctors and nurses enter the NICU, you both watch silently as they make sure your daughter is doing well. It’s a silent and solemn affair to watch someone else be able to hold your baby—even if it’s just for a routine check in to make sure she’s making the progress she needs. Calum sees your arms flinching, watches as they calm when she’s back in the incubator and quiet. He knows it’s killing you to not hold her, cradle her in your arms and keep her safe from the world. It’s killing him too. Though you’re both somber and exhausted from the previous night, Calum finds that the morning is easier, he’s a little more light and certain. He won’t call it a good feeling as he doesn’t want to jinx it, but as he stares down at her and her eyes flutter open to meet his gaze he feels more calm and collected than he has in a week. His phone buzzes and though he doesn’t want to peel his gaze away from her he looks down and finds a message from Ashton.

“Ash says we should go get breakfast, he and Mali will come in for her,” Calum informs you and for the first time you don’t argue in favor of staying. Last night was too much, twenty minutes to recollect yourselves sounds good, and you’ve both come to trust Ashton and Mali to be alone with her.

“Alright, just get something quick from the cafeteria,” you agree and give your daughter one last touch and affirmation of love. You’ve both made it a habit to have your parting words to her be “I love you”.

Breakfast passes in a blur, remnants of blueberry muffins get swept into the trash and soon enough you’re both on your way back up to her. You’re stopped short in the hallway, a doctor calling out to you.

“Hoods?”

You both turn and a nervous feeling flutters through Calum’s chest. He holds his breath for a moment as he takes in the sight of the doctor. He exhales when the doctor seems in no rush and holds no note of concern. Calum supposes it’s a routine check in to tell about her progress and what the next steps are. Calum’s about ready to ask if you might be able to hold her soon, knowing how far she’s come and how much better she’s doing but the words get trapped as the doctor starts talking.

“She’s put on some weight. Her vitals are good. We’ll be transferring her to an open incubator for the day and if all goes well she should be able to go home by tonight or tomorrow morning.”

“What?” you ask, voice small in Calum’s ears, tinny and distant as you both process the news.

The doctor runs through it again, tells you slowly and answers questions that pop up during the explanation. Once it all makes sense, once it sinks in and the reality that her and home is coming sooner than either of you could have hoped for you’re both struck with a whirlwind of emotions. You freeze and for the second time the life of your daughter brings Calum to his knees. He doesn’t realize that he’s sobbing until you find him on the floor and your gentle hands and voice start to soothe him. Your fingers run through his hair and you repeat a new mantra that’s carved in stone and faith.

“She’s okay. We can go home.”

Your voice is a whisper and the NICU door opening and closing and footsteps all scream around you both. Calum clutches you and tries to catch his breath.

“What’s going on? What happened?” Ashton’s voice cuts through and brings you both to your feet. Calum doesn’t let go of you, face buried against your shoulder, but he finds some breath and wrestles with words and comes up empty.

“We get to take her home,” you explain and Calum suddenly hears Mali too, excited gasps and squeals sounding all around. Calum doesn’t let go of you but he feels his sister and best friend join the hug and appreciates their presence more than any choked up words could explain.

“Right now? I’ll go get the car,” Ashton asks and is reeling and ready to go but is stopped short.

“Tonight or in the morning,” you explain and Calum is grateful you’re strong enough to find words when he can’t. He continues holding you when Mali and Ashton break away, spilling their excitement out in bursts followed by tears.

He feels your hands in his hair again and the gentle sway of your body rocking him as he tries to ground himself into the reality that she really is okay. That nights filled with worries and days packed with exhaustion and waiting and waiting and waiting are going to be over. He breathes a little easier and finally detaches himself from you. You wipe his tears and he wipes yours and small laughs formed from disbelief and exhaustion spill past your lips.

“We have to finish her forms,” you remind and Calum doesn’t hesitate to dig into his jacket pocket where the papers for her birth certificate have been on standby. All that’s left to fill in is her name. “Should we go with…?” you ask and trail off as you peek at Mali and Ashton who are waiting with great suspense. Calum nods.

You fumble with the paper and pen and write her name out against the wall. You stay silent as you turn back to the group. You can sense Mali and Ashton are trying to be patient but the anticipation grows and keeps them on edge. All you do is silently hand them the paper so they can read for themselves.

“Mila Ashe Hood,” Mali reads in a breathy whisper coated with surprise. “She’s named after us?”

“After her godparents,” Calum says, finally finding some words but getting the wind knocked out of him once more as another group hug ensues. “Thank you guys, for everything, we couldn’t have made it without you.”

“That’s what family is for,” Ashton says without hesitation. “Now get in there and celebrate with her.”

***

“Do you want to hold her first?” you ask and look up at Calum with wide eyes. He meets your gaze, remembers your outstretched arm falling as they took her away, your pained and whispered words of just wanting to hold her, the way you flinched with fear at the sight of doctors outside the window. He wants to hold her but he wants you to have the moment you’ve been missing for seven days.

“It’s all you, sweetheart, you can go first,” he says and is content to watch with adoration and love as you reach into the open incubator she will be leaving for good momentarily to take her into your arms for the first time.

“Hi love bug,” you whisper as she settles in your hold; eyes open, quiet and content. “She’s so tiny and beautiful and perfect,” you say and softly rub her back. Calum sees tears in your eyes and for one of the first times in a week he knows they’re made of happiness. “Are you ready to go home?”

Mila doesn’t so much as squirm and you both take her contentment as a resounding yes. Calum lets you hold her for a few minutes more, takes several photos to capture the moment forever, knowing neither of you will ever want to forget. Mila’s eyes find Calum and his heart flutters.

“That’s daddy,” you tell her in a coo. “Do you want to go see daddy?”

The slow motion of Calum’s world stops as his entire universe ends up cradled in his arms. Mila weighs barely five pounds and Calum surmises your guess of her fitting in one hand would be right. But he holds her with all of the soft strength and love he has and wonders if he’ll ever be ready to let go.

“Ashton’s bringing the car around,” you inform. “Her car seat…”

“Luke dropped by and installed it,” Calum responds and laughs when you give him an uncertain look. “I’ll make sure it’s secure.” He would never let anything bad happen to his baby girl.

The transition from the hospital to the car goes fast in comparison to the agonizing wait of seven days. You both sit in the back with her, holding her hands, talking to her and enjoying the feeling of freedom from the incubator and anxiety. Mila is back in your arms and seeing her home for the first time in what seems like no time at all. The car ride flew by. Calum heads down the hall and takes a peek at the nursery.

“Sweetheart, come look,” he calls down the hall and pushes the door fully open when you and Mila reach him.

The sight of the finished nursery is breathtaking. You and Calum show Mila around her room; from the white crib and the pictures of woodland creatures above, to the rocker in the corner and the endless clothes that line her drawers.

“This is your room,” you coo, and shift your weight from one foot to the other, already noting that she likes a small rhythm when she’s held. “You’ll sleep right here when you’re bigger. For now you sleep right by mommy and daddy.”

You go across the hall to your room where her bassinet is set up and timidly ask Calum if it can switch sides of the bed so she can be near you. You explain it’s so you can feed her easier in the night but Calum doesn’t need an explanation, he’d do anything for you and her. He makes the switch and you gently lay her inside, kiss her forehead and clutch Calum as he stands by your side.

“I want to have more kids, I want her to have a sibling like you and Mali but I can’t go through that again,” you whisper and Calum can hear the heartache in your tone.

He pulls you close. “She will. We wanted to adopt, remember?”

You light up at that and smile with such sincerity it takes the ache right from your hearts. “Yeah. We’ll adopt,” you say and snuggle against Calum’s chest as a smirk grows on your face. “So, do you want to start that process tomorrow or?”

Calum bellows out a laugh and runs his fingers through your hair.

“Let’s take a breather, yeah? Enjoy being home with her for just a bit.”

“Okay,” you concede and Calum lets you drag him to bed where you can both rest. With his arms around you and your eyes on Mila who has fallen fast asleep you let out a content sigh and Calum smiles.

“I love you,” Calum says once and then again, one for you and one for Mila and you repeat the same back to them.

“I’m so happy to be home with my family,” you say around a sigh.

Seven months of pregnancy and seven days in the hospital have worn you both thin but in that moment there’s no other place you’d rather be. Beside your baby and in each other’s arms. The wait and anxiety are worth it once you find that all you have now is happiness and love. Calum and Mila.

<< >>

I can’t believe we’ve finally made it to this point in the dates with cal universe. I’m so appreciative of the support whether you’ve been around since the very first blurb, joined somewhere in the middle or are just finding this world. Thank you all so much. There is much to come, I hope you stick around for the journey.

Premature birth can come with many complications. What was depicted in this fic is one scenario of struggles parents and preemies can face. If you feel so inclined there are amazing charities to check out to help support families and babies in their time of need. Overall, stay kind and spread love and support.

If you’d like to join my tag list just let me know!

Tagged: @rosecolouredash @irwinkitten @golden-hood @who-do-you-love-5sos @caswinchester2000 @wildflowergrae @cuddlemecalx @malumsmermaid @babylon-corgis @outerspaceisbetterthannothing @mariellelovescupcakes @xhaileyreneex @gosh-im-short @spookydaddycal @loveroflrh @findingliam-o @flowerthug @g-l-pierce @talkfastromance4 @cashtonasfuck @sc0ttish-wildfl0wer @wastedheartcth @calumscalm @notinthesameguey @lukesfuckingbeard @myloverboyash @treatallwithkindness @haikucal @wiildflower-xxx @calum-uncrowned @egyptiangoldhood @drarryetcetera @another-lonely-heart @megz1985 @idk-harry @dinosaursandsocks @wildflower-cth @idontneedanyone @everyscarisahealingplace @myfavfanficsever @stormrider505 @karajaynetoday @333-xx @calumshpod @calumsphile @calumrose @justhereforcalum @grreatgooglymoogly @calumance @ashhhbeee @chicken-ona-stick @wish-you-were-here-hood @mantlereid @hemmingslftv @homeofpoetry @shamelessfangirl-3

#Calum hood #5sos #5 seconds of summer #Calum hood blurbs #Calum hood imagines #5sos blurbs #5sos imagines #calum hood x you #calum hood x reader #calum hood angst #Calum hood fluff #dad!cal #cal!dates #5sos x you #5sos x reader #5sos angst #5sos fluff #chblurb

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animekit · 3 years

Text

Love on the Battlefield

-Haikyuu! Military AU

-Reader X Kuroo

Pt 5: Error

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“C-Captain?”

“What is it, Lieutenant?”

“Did you really take a good look at this map and our surroundings?”

“I think so. Why?”

“Sir… it would appear that we were dropped in the wrong location. Or received an incorrect map.”

“What?!” He snatched the map from your hands and inspected it thoroughly. “How…?”

You watched as, one by one, all the enlisted men turn their attention towards you two. You wished you could’ve changed your expression, but you looked like you saw a ghost and that’s all the team saw. And that was enough to let even the newest recruit know that something was wrong.

One of the sergeants walked over to you. “Is something wrong, ma’am.”

Your voice sounded hollow when you spoke. “Well, Sergeant, we have quite a big problem. We weren’t dropped off where we’re supposed to be. And the plane left as soon as we all touched the ground. And since we’ve heard nothing on the radios, I’m assuming that there’s no connection between us and the compound back home. To sum it up, we’re stranded with a whole bunch of nothing and we are completely on our own.”

The Captain shook his head. “The Lieutenant is right. This map shows where we were supposed to be. And we’re not there. Looks like tomorrow we’ll have to walk until we find civilians so we can get all this sorted out.”

The men each had there own expression, but they all silently said the same thing: We’re fucked.

The Sergeant sighed. “Well, fuck. This is the worse case scenario.”

“What do you mean, sir?” The Private looked almost intrigued with whatever the sergeant wanted to say.

“Well, we’re stuck in the middle of nowhere and have nothing to go by. And to make matters worse, we have the Black Cat with us.”

Kuroo looked up. “Black Cat? Are you talking about me?”

“No. Have you never heard that before, sir?”

“I haven’t. At least not that I can recall. What’s the Black Cat.”

You froze as the sergeant’s gaze turned to you, pointing a finger right at you. “It’s her.”

“Me?” You’ve heard people call you that. You know how they interpret it. And you hated hearing it.

The Sergeant nodded. “The Lieutenant is often called the Black Cat. And I didn’t want anything to do with that.”

Kuroo tensed. “Why? What do people mean by ‘Black Cat’ when referring to Lieutenant Y/N?”

“She’s bad luck on combat missions. The moment she’s separated from the group, everyone dies. And she miraculously slaughters all the enemies. We were all promised a promotion so we’d have no problems working with her, but looks like that was just bait so they don’t have to worry about giving anyone a promotion. We’re all gonna die because of her and she’s probably gonna get out of this with barely a scratch. Then she’ll be the only person getting promoted.”

Memories of those past missions came flooding back. You looked down, worried that these men would see your pain.

Kuroo’s voice sounded rough, but anger was definitely present. “She was always sent out alone to report. And don’t you dare speak that way about one of your commanding officers, Sergeant. One word from me and you could either be kicked out for attempted desertion or betrayal. Or I could get you demoted for talking back to an officer. I think you’d make a wonderful private, don’t you?”

Why? Why is he defending me? I even told him that I hate him… and he still decides to help?

You barely heard the men apologize to you and Kuroo. You just felt exhausted.

“Is my tent set up?”

The Private’s voice sounded from a spot fairly close by. “Yes, ma’am!”

“Thank you. I’d like to rest now. The rest of you better do that’s same. We have a long day ahead of us tomorrow.”

“Yes, ma’am!”

And with that, you went into your tent. You let your hair down, the braided it, removing the uniform and slipping into a large shirt and some shorts. You lied down in her sleeping bag and closed your eyes.

#haikyuu!!#kuroo #military au #reader x kuroo #fanfic

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notalittlebutalottie · 4 years

Note

Lottie, sweetheart, I am in urgent need of some hurt/comfort. Do you have anything that you might be willing to share? Please, please, pretty please! 🥺 THANK YOU! 💙🌼💙

Aga, I appreciate your commitment to this ask that I asked you to ask ❤😘 I started writing this in January when I was feeling my sad girl shit™️ and it’s been nearly two months since I last posted a drabble this long so...be gentle 🌼 Quite frankly, I don’t even know if I like it...but I hope you guys do!

♡ KLAROLINE DRABBLE #65: No Lights on the Horizon♡

New York City rains far more than Caroline had anticipated. It seems to coincide with every bad day and kick her when she’s already down. It waits until she’s out of the subway and on the long stretch of block to pour from the sky. She trudges along as best as she can but the mop of hair that begins to weigh her down isn’t exactly motivational. Then, when she’s finally stumbling into her apartment building, her clothes are dripping with each step. Today is no better. It’s worse. Her bag feels heavier than usual and her attempt at dolling herself up by way of stilettos has proved to be an ill-choice. But the stairwell feels unbearably long, heels or no heels. Sleep has been hard to come by as of late and the higher up she gets on the stairs, the harder she has to pull herself up by the banister.

It’s not all bad living in New York, though. The Spring she arrived was one of the most thrilling moments in her life. Freedom from her small town of Mystic Falls was an alluring prospect but nowhere near the true excitement of what she experienced. And then September came, the seasons changed and it all went to shit. Her first job is fine, her co-workers are fine, and the pay, while questionable, is fine. But life has been nothing but a drizzle since her mother’s death. The two weeks she spent back at home collecting pitiful glances from townsfolk and attempting to box up her childhood home while her absent father looked on weren’t cathartic in the slightest. All she can do is throw herself into work and hope that the gaping hole she feels will close up eventually.

When Caroline finally reaches her door, she can hear a cacophony of voices and it draws a tired breath. She lets her eyes fall shut and her shoulders sag for a moment. The bi-weekly meeting of the MFSG or Mystic Falls Support Group is one strict in her calendar. She had started it only a week after settling into life in New York to rally all those who had escaped their small town of Virginia. She had been more gung ho about the idea than the others at the time, most of them content to go their separate ways, but managed to succeed with some prodding. Katherine is adamant that the name sounds cheesy but when Caroline asked for a better idea, she rolled her eyes and told her, “whatever.”

It’s Caroline’s turn this week and she’s sure she cancelled it but her mind hasn’t been very focused past the daily motions. Of all the things she doesn’t need right now, it’s her friends arguing back and forth over meaningless crap while she pretends to care. The energy they’ll no doubt demand from her is energy she just doesn’t have right now. She contemplates whether she can make a break for the nearest coffee shop and wait them out. It won’t be a proud moment but at least she’ll have some peace. She scraps that idea the moment she realises that the collective stubbornness of her friends far outweighs hers alone.

She fumbles with her keys, taking a deep breath because she really can’t be crying over opening a freaking door, and twists it roughly when it’s finally in. She does her best to blink away all exhaustion as she’s making her entrance and even that feels like a terrible effort. The least she can do, she thinks, is brush her damp curls behind her ear in hopes that it somehow makes her presentable.

“Finally, the host is here!” Katherine yells before she even crosses the threshold. When Caroline does step in, she’s quick to comment, “You look like hell, Care.”

Caroline manages an eye-roll but she can’t bring herself to grin as she says, “Thanks, Kat. I’ll let the weatherman know rain doesn’t go with Ralph Lauren.” No one takes note of her demeanour, thankfully. They’ve all collected on the couches at the far end of the room, their belongings strewn over the coffee table. She’s lucky to have such a nice apartment when Kat and Bonnie share what’s practically a shoe box and Matt’s couch-surfing at Elena and Stefan’s place. If she was less needy, she might complain about the shared bathroom but even that is much larger than the New York average.

When she pushes the door shut behind her, Katherine is already continuing on a conversation, “So anyway, Greta told me that April told her—”

Caroline sheds herself of her brown duffle coat and clumsily lets it fall onto the hook beside the door. She kicks off her shoes and spends a few seconds standing idle. She wonders if locking herself in her room would give them the hint to leave or whether they’ll take to banging on her door until she reappears. Just like the coffee shop idea, it becomes null and void when she remembers who her friends are.

“How was work?” she hears to the right of her, low and careful. Her shoulders hitch upwards but she forces them to settle before looking in the voice’s direction. Klaus is standing in the kitchenette, paint stained henley and sweatpants on, his eyes fixed on hers as he holds a mug.

“Fine,” is all she can muster for now.

Stubborn friends aside, Klaus is another thing she just can’t deal with right now. Her relationship with him wasn’t a planned one and neither was the not-so-happy ending to it. She had initially asked Rebekah if she could crash at hers but apparently, giving up even one inch of space was too much for her. So Caroline was pawned off onto her brother with the empty room and poor social skills. Scratch that. Great social skills and an even greater unwillingness to use them. And a serious ability to push her buttons. Between their heated discussions over music and run-ins after showers, it wasn’t long before she began thoroughly considering the moral quandary of jumping into bed with her friend’s older brother. Katherine, of course, encouraged her the moment the arrangement was mentioned. She’d done her best to avoid it but just one wandering eye and a quirked lip at one a.m. was all it took for her to be nestled in his lap with his hands on her hips and their lips battling for dominance.

READ THE REST AND COMMENT HERE

#klaroline #klaus mikaelson #caroline forbes #klaroline fanfiction #the vampire diaries #the originals #kc fanfiction #drabble #hurt and comfort #human au #romance #klarolineagainnaturally

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onlysarah235678 · 4 years

Text

A Little Bit Part 14

Pairing: Billie Dean Howard x female reader

A/N: Two in one weekend again? That better not be a thing…I hope you enjoy. As always the gifs are NOT mine. These next two…or more are illuminated-blue’s.

Warnings: some hurt/comfort, angst and brief mention of physical assault

For the entire drive to Billie’s house, you sleep soundly in the front seat while Billie stresses about how these next few days are going to work out. You had been too out of it to walk to the car, so Billie had pushed you in a wheelchair to the parking deck. You’d hated it and grumbled the whole time but it was so nonsensical that she didn’t even bother trying to follow what you were saying.

Now that you were at Billie’s, the medium hoped that she didn’t regret her decision to decline to take the chair with her. You’d convinced her that you could walk. You just needed a nap and then maybe some dinner first. You were starving. Billie hadn’t argued because she didn’t want to waste your energy, but as she tried to get you out of the car, she realized that maybe she should have.

“Come on, Y/N. Can you stand for me?”

You just groan under your breath still too tired to do much more than open your eyes. You looked to Billie on your right and whine in frustration when you realize what she’d asked. You shake your head before reaching out for the blonde. You were going to try. You were determined to not just be dead weight to the woman who had waited for way longer than you expected, just to see you.

With this in mind you grit your teeth—but then stop immediately because wow that hurt-before grabbing Billie’s offered hand. You could do this. You weren’t an invalid, your head just hurt a lot and you were exhausted.

“Woah.”

When you make it to your feet you sway slightly, but Billie is there to steady you. She catches you and closes the door behind you, shooting you an apologetic look when you cringe at the sound. She is about to offer you her hand, in case you want to try walking on your own, but you just cling to her arm before muttering under your breath.

“Okay, I’m ready.”

Billie nods and you make your way towards the house. She lets you set the pace and you can’t believe how far away her front door is after only five steps from the car. You feel like you should be there already but you’re going so slowly it’s maddening. You sigh as you close your eyes and try to move a little faster. This results in you feeling like your brain is rattling around inside of your skull, so you slow back down before groaning under your breath in frustration.

“It’s okay, sweetheart. Take your time.”

You sigh before opening your eyes and trying to focus on Billie. It’s too dark to really see her, but you’re close enough to smell her perfume and you hate how it makes you slightly nauseous. You keep this thought to yourself; however, as you squeeze Billie’s arm before taking another step.

“I’m sorry, I hate this.”

Billie smiles slightly at your petulant tone before her expression turns darker. She has already started working to figure out who did this to you and she was determined to make him pay for it. She wasn’t sure how yet, and she had to talk to you first, but she didn’t want to let this slide. You could have been seriously hurt.

“You have nothing to be sorry about, Y/N. None of this is your fault.”

You want to argue, but you just stay silent as you and Billie finally make it to the front door. She has to loosen her grip on you a little so she can find her keys and you catch yourself leaning on her, so you try to stand up a little straighter. You reach out for the door to hold yourself up and you realize immediately why that was supremely stupid.

The door disappears out from under you as Billie opens it, and you close your eyes as you prepare to fall on your face. You’re lucky that Billie is right there to catch you, otherwise you would have fallen for the second time in one day. You don’t count passing out at work.

“Shi-!”

“Here, hold onto me.”

You reach out for Billie in answer and you lean into her once again as you cross over the threshold with a groan. The house was quiet which you were grateful for, but you didn’t have much time the bask in the silence before Billie’s speaking. You don’t have it in you to ask her to be quieter because you already owe her so much, so you just follow her and hold back the urge to cringe.

“Are you hungry, or do you want to just go straight to bed? I can set up the guest room for you so it’s as quiet as possible.”

You nod slowly before you look toward the stairs. They seem like such an obstacle and you nearly groan at the thought of having to walk up them. You smile slightly before looking back to Billie with what you hope is more of a grateful expression than a grimace.

“Bed please.”

Billie nods before directing you towards the stairs, and you want to try on your own just to prove that you can do it, but you know it’s not a good idea. So you let Billie lead you up the stairs and towards the guest bedroom. You’d never seen it before, but it was similar to Billie’s except for the bed. You didn’t really care though, you only wanted to sleep so you nod when Billie asks you if it was alright.

You watch as she gets things ready, offering to help, but she doesn’t let you. Once everything’s done, you shoot Billie a grateful look before sitting down on the bed with a sigh.

“Thank you, Billie.”

Billie just smiles at you before letting you know that she’ll be downstairs if you need anything. You look to your phone that’s on the bedside table but decide not the bother right now. You weren’t supposed to look at screens too much. It would certainly aggravate your headache.

As you watch Billie leave, you wish you would have been more specific when you thanked her. You sigh as you get a little more comfortable. Despite how much you slept you really are tired, and you could probably sleep through the night. At least what’s left of it. Once under the covers you close your eyes and try not to focus on anything but sleep. You don’t worry about work right now, or Milo despite wondering where he is. The only reason you hadn’t asked yet was because you trusted Billie to make sure he was taken care of.

Despite your efforts, you find your mind drifting back to your dog and work and how you thoroughly fucked up. You should have listened to Billie, but you hated making others pick up the slack for you. You also didn’t think it would be this bad. You shift again under the covers to try and cover your face with a groan. The room was dark and quiet except for the sound of your thundering pulse behind your eyes. As you laid there trying and failing to sleep you start to realize that Billie must be cooking something.

The smell of food reminds you that you are very, very hungry. You don’t think that you ate at the hospital, but honestly up until Billie showed up, it was all a blur. You may have answered questions and you had a few tests done, but you honestly couldn’t say what they told you. Were you in the clear?

Almost 30 minutes pass of you trying to find the best position to keep your headache from worsening before you give up. You can’t just lie here and overthink. You need to do something.

After Billie finishes making dinner, she considers bringing you some for almost ten minutes. She eventually decides not to and to just let you sleep, but she can’t help but be restless as she tries to find ways to keep herself busy. She checks on the kittens and ends up taking Mickey downstairs as she considers texting Erin. Eventually she decides that the younger woman was probably still up. Midnight wasn’t that late. Also, she believes that she might appreciate being kept in the loop. Billie texts her a quick update before moving back to the kitchen.

She’d changed clothes shortly after getting you into bed, and now she was walking around with Mickey in her pocket again. He was doing much better and hadn’t been at the bottom of any kitten piles recently. He was getting so big and was doing so much better at getting around on his own. At least compared to what he had been since his fall. He was almost as big as his brothers and sisters, and although this is mostly because Billie’s been feeding him more, she couldn’t be happier.

Billie is cleaning up the kitchen when her phone vibrates from the living room. She finishes up what she’s doing before drying her hands and going to see what Erin said.

Billie had simply told her that you were fine and then thanked her for taking care of Milo. She didn’t want to consider all of the logistics of getting Milo back, and possibly some of your things. It had been an exhausting day stressing about you and then stressing even more about you. Billie was ready to sleep, but she needed to stay up in case you needed anything.

Of course! I’m glad to hear she’s doing better. Is there anything I can do to help?

Billie smiles slightly at this because Erin seemed like such a sweetheart. She was reminded once again of how glad she was that you had Erin at work with you. She clearly cared about you and Billie was grateful that she had been at work with you today.

No thank you. You’re doing enough already by taking care of Milo. Is he causing any trouble?

A few messages later Erin asks how she wants to get Milo back. Billie’s tempted to wait and ask you, but she knows that’s not going to work. Even worse she’s sure you’ll want to get him yourself and go back to your place in the morning. Once you were up and hopefully a little less confused, she would tell you exactly what your doctor said about taking it easy.

You weren’t supposed to drive for the next couple of days at least. You couldn’t work, watch television or any screen really, or exercise much. Billie figured you could stay here for a couple of days until you were better, and she would be fine with Milo coming here too. Billie honestly didn’t have anything that couldn’t be put off. At least until the interview on Wednesday.

All thoughts about how she was going to make that work left her mind when she heard her name from the other room. She’d returned to the kitchen for a drink and sat at the counter to text Erin. She hadn’t heard you coming down the stairs, but as she walks back into the living room to see you sitting on the bottom step, she wonders how in the hell she had missed it.

“Y/N, what are you doing out of bed? Do you need something?”

You just groan under your breath because now your head was spinning. You had known that trying to get down the stairs on your own was dumb, but you’d done it anyway in the safest way you knew how. You’d sat down at the top and scooted in a very undignified way all the way down. You just couldn’t lie in bed any longer not sleeping. You were thinking too much and you wanted to do something.

It didn’t take long for you to decide that you wanted to see Billie.

“Not really. I just couldn’t sleep. Was getting restless.”

You open your eyes and look up to see that Billie has changed clothes. You haven’t seen her so casually dressed and you smile at her before trying to stand up. You plant your hands on the stair beneath you before trying to push yourself to your feet.

“You look cute. I probably look a mess.”

You don’t make it to your feet because your head throbs at the sudden change, but Billie grabs your hand to steady you. You sigh as you move in to hug her but you stop short as you do a double take at the tail sticking out of her pocket. Oh.

Mickey.

“Nonsense, sweetheart. You’re adorable with bedhead.”

You sigh because rolling your eyes is too much effort before you squeeze Billie’s hand. You go to say something snarky when your stomach growls loudly. You blush before muttering an apology that Billie just smiles at. It’s late and she’s not surprised that you’re hungry. She starts heading for the kitchen before she remembers to slow down.

“Sorry.”

“No need to apologize. I made dinner if you want some.”

Despite your protests to help, you sit patiently at the counter and wait for your dinner. You watch through squinted eyes as Billie moves around the kitchen with Mickey in her pocket. You smile as Billie places a plate of food in front of you before moving to start putting everything away again.

“Do you want something to drink other than water?”

You look to the glass that you haven’t touched before smiling slightly at the subtle reminder. You know that Billie isn’t going to let you drink anything else. At least not until you finish this.

“I’m fine. Thank you. For this and, well everything else you’ve done tonight. I’m sorry if I didn’t say it sooner.”

You suddenly fear that you hadn’t said anything at all since you got here and you panic. You don’t get a chance to keep apologizing however before Billie responds as she finishes up and comes to sit next to you.

“You did, Y/N, and you’re welcome. I’m more than happy to.”

Billie scoots her chair closer to yours and you sigh before nodding to yourself and grabbing your fork. You look back to Mickey who is now peeking out of Billie’s pocket. You smile at him before reaching out to scratch his head with a sigh. He makes you think of Milo, and even though you promised yourself you wouldn’t ask you can’t help it. He’s your baby and you can’t help but want to know how he is.

“Billie?”

Billie knows what you’re going to ask before you even say it, but she doesn’t interrupt you as you turn back to your food. You take a couple of bites before you turn to her with a curious look.

“Is Milo still at work?”

Billie could see how hesitant you were so she didn’t waste any time shaking her head. She tells you that Milo is with Erin and that he’s behaving like a good boy. You smile, happy to hear this, but you can’t deny the guilt you feel at having left him without any warning. You know that you can’t blame yourself and agonizing over it would be silly, but you miss your dog.

“He’s fine, Y/N. Erin offered to bring him over tomorrow morning.”

You smile gratefully before you go back to your food. You’re starving, but after a couple of minutes you feel your headache getting worse. Billie isn’t talking much, just petting Mickey and watching you as you start to eat slower. Eventually you stop with a groan and cover your eyes with your hands.

“I’m exhausted. I think I need to lie down.”

Not twenty minutes later you’re asleep on Billie’s couch because you didn’t want to go upstairs. Billie was resting beside you, but was quickly fading as well. It had been a long exhausting day and it was definitely catching up with her. She had put Mickey with the rest of the cats, so she really had nothing keeping her from falling asleep next to you.

She didn’t realize that she had truly fallen asleep until the doorbell rang the next morning. She sat up slightly sore and only a little panicky as she hurried to get up and answer the door. She glanced over to you, grateful that you were still asleep before checking the clock in the kitchen. It was almost 8 in the morning. How had she slept so late?

Billie practically runs to the front door barefoot with her hair looking a mess. She glances at the mirror by the door and just groans before running a hand through her hair uselessly. She opens the door looking a little more frazzled than she’d like, but she knows it doesn’t really matter. It is Monday morning and she was up until almost 2 am.

Billie opens the door and sees Erin standing on her porch with Milo sitting next to her practically vibrating in excitement. Billie smiles as she moves to grab the top part of Erin’s impressively large stack of supplies that she’d brought for Milo.

“Hi, Erin. Thank you for coming over. I’m sorry I didn’t realize how late it was.”

Erin smiles before thanking Billie for taking Milo’s food and bowls so she could better balance his bed that she’d gotten from your office. She had run to work this morning when she realized that she hadn’t brought enough food for Milo for the unforeseeable future. She had also gotten the bed that you kept under your desk for whenever Milo napped up there with you. It didn’t happen often, but Erin was glad to see it was still there when she ran up to your office to see if there was anything that could be of use.

“Not a problem, Ms. Howard. I hope I didn’t wake you up. Milo, wait!”

Billie steps aside to let Erin and Milo in and the brunette has to tighten her hold on Milo’s leash as he tries to dart inside. He is sniffling like crazy and he’s trying to break free, but Erin isn’t sure where you are and doesn’t want you to be ambushed by your overexcited dog.

Billie smiles as she shuts the door behind the pair and shakes her head with a laugh. She manages to fix her hair, but her wrinkled, very casual clothing will just have to do. It’s not like she really cares that much. Erin seems like a nice girl who has your best interests at heart. Hopefully that meant that she wouldn’t do anything to embarrass you. Or her.

“Don’t worry about it, dear and you don’t have to call me that. Billie is just fine.”

Erin fights back the initial urge to squeal and just nods in agreement as she follows the blonde into her house. She takes off her shoes as she looks around briefly until she sees the living room. Specifically, you sleeping in the living room.

“You can put that anywhere.”

Erin’s attention snaps back to Billie before she just nods dumbly before dropping Milo’s bed on the carpet. She nudges it out of the way before she has to grab Milo’s leash with two hands. He had realized you were here and had jumped on the back of the couch to find you. His front feet were only on it for a second before Erin cursed and pulled him down.

“Milo, no. Get down.”

Billie watches as Milo starts to yip and whine and try to get to you. You’re rolling onto your side with a groan as you wake up and realize your headache was still with you. You should have known it would be, but you had held out hope, foolish, useless hope that it wouldn’t be. Still, soon that is the second thing on your mind when you sit up to see Billie watching you. It takes you a second to realize that you’re not alone, but when you hear Milo whine you turn suddenly and see him nearly pulling Erin’s arm off.

“Erin you’re here! It’s not already time for work is it?”

You miss Erin’s confused look and Billie’s sigh as you turn back to your dog. Milo barks and yanks again before you roll your eyes. You shake your head before sitting up slightly as you prepare for the onslaught.

“You can let him go Erin.”

Erin shoots you a concerned look before glancing to Billie briefly. You speak before Billie has a chance to shrug and Erin drops Milo’s leash hesitantly.

“It’s okay.”

Milo doesn’t run around the couch like you thought he would. Instead, he leaps over it and jumps into your lap with another series of whines that make your head hurt.

“Milo! Jesu-.”

You grab Milo’s shoulders but don’t stop him as he licks you frantically and steps on your legs. You sigh as Milo licks your face before you push him back a little bit. You finally calm him down before getting him to sit at your feet instead of on top of you. He won’t get off the couch though and you don’t have the energy to fight him on it. You look back to Erin when she speaks up to clarify something that she’s not sure you realize yet.

“Well Milo was getting antsy so I thought I’d bring him a little early. I also don’t have work today. Neither of us do.”

You take a second to realize this before shaking your head with a smile. You suddenly remember why you’re here in the first place, and you feel a little embarrassed as you try to figure out what to say. You’re not sure if Erin realizes this, but Billie certainly does and she speaks up to fill the slightly awkward silence.

“When is Y/N expected back at work?”

You turn to Billie before looking back to Erin who is considering the question. You smile at Billie, shooting her a grateful look that she misses as she watches Erin pull out her phone. She quickly pulls up the email that the lead doctor sent to both of you.

“Dr. Stewart says you can have as much time off as you need and that she’s cleared your week. Here’s the email if you want to read it.”

Erin walks over to you and hands her phone over with a smile. She can see your confusion, but figures that is due to the fact that you’d been sleeping and hadn’t checked your email yet. Billie opens her mouth to say something, but you beat her to it.

“Dr. Stewart cleared my whole week?”

It is a rhetorical question and Erin just nods in response as you read the email. By the time you finish you squeeze your eyes shut for a moment before handing Erin back her phone. You’re glad that your boss had the foresight to send the email to her as well, knowing full well that you wouldn’t check your own. You hadn’t even looked at your phone since you’d called Billie yesterday.

“That’s great news.”

There’s a pause as you close your eyes again to try and will away your headache, but it’s short lived as Milo starts to lick your hand.

“Thank you by the way. For yesterday and today. Just everything.”

You smile awkwardly and Erin just waves you off before saying that it’s fine. You had scared the hell out of her yesterday and she isn’t sure she’s ever been so stressed in her life, but she wasn’t going to say that. She was just glad that you were okay, and that Milo was well-behaved. He had just slept the whole time he was with her and only scared her cat once.

“Of course, Doc.”

Billie smiles at the exchange between the two of you before she remembers her manners. She’s a little tired still, or at least thrown about not having any time to wake up before having company over. She’s looking to the kitchen before glancing back to the brunette who is pocketing her phone.

“Would you like anything to drink, Erin?”

Erin was quick to shake her head despite the fact that the idea of hanging out with Billie Dean was making her slightly faint. She had to get back home to her cat, but mostly she could tell how tired you still were and she didn’t want to linger. She sighs before motioning to the door behind her with a smile.

“No thank you. I should get going. Unless there is anything that either of you need?”

Both you and Billie smile before shaking your heads. You cringe as a result, and neither Billie nor Erin misses this. Billie frowns before smiling back at Erin. She let’s her know that she’s done more than enough before watching as she leaves. You thank her again before moving to stand up, but you don’t get far. Milo jumps up too, messing up your balance and you fall back down on the couch with a curse.

“How am I still tired?”

You groan as you try to get Milo off the couch again, but you are about a successful as the first time. You watch as Billie circles the couch before coming to sit next to you. She takes Milo’s spot as the shepherd finally jumps down and plants himself practically on your feet. You sigh but can’t help the small smile at the sight of your dog so happy to see you again. You’d missed him too but you didn’t have the energy to communicate that properly.

“That’s normal after an injury like yours. Or so Dr. Skinner says.”

You turn to Billie with a smile, immediately recognizing her ticked tone. You don’t remember much about last night, but you had easily picked up on Billie’s less-than-happy tone when she’d been talking to your doctor. You sigh again before leaning against the medium with a chuckle. You ask despite not really knowing whether or not it’s a good idea to bring it up.

“Not a fan I’m guessing?”

Billie scoffs as she thinks back to the man who had the gall to suggest that she’d taken her time getting to the hospital, or that you weren’t a real doctor because you treated animals instead of people. Billie didn’t think you had picked up on any of this so she just shook her head before saying something vague that didn’t really answer your question.

“No, he was a little too arrogant for my taste.”

You frown as you try to consider what Dr. Skinner could have done to piss Billie off. You had learned early that it was difficult to ruffle Billie’s feathers. She was usually so unflappable, but if someone pushed the right buttons, they would find themselves in a very unenviable position. You could only hope that you never did anything to wind up in such a position.

“He did raise a good point though.”

You open your eyes slightly as you meet Billie’s gaze. At least you try to, but she’s looking at Milo who is still watching you intently.

“What do you mean?”

You wait as Billie sits back against the couch with a sigh. You follow her and she wraps an arm around you as you move closer to her with a yawn. You haven’t showered and after being in the hospital, you feel dirtier than you have in a while. You don’t care about this right now though, all of your attention is on Billie as she sighs again before mentioning what she’d talked about with a nurse. You’d been unconscious and apparently had missed a lot.

“He asked whether or not you wanted to file a police report about what happened.”

You don’t answer immediately. You hadn’t really thought about this even after Billie reminded you of what happened last night. You still couldn’t remember most of it, but the medium had told you the gist of the incident and you were miffed of course, but didn’t really think about taking action against him. Doug was an asshole that had been mostly harmless in the past. You hadn’t really feared for your safety around him, but you guess that’s no longer that case.

You frown and think about why Doug had pushed you down the stairs in the first place. He clearly had it out for you and wanted you to know it. If you ever crossed his path in the future, would he try this type of thing again? It was a lot to think about and you could feel a headache coming on as you squeezed your eyes shut.

“I don’t know, Billie. I-.”

You trail off as you take a deep breath and try to finish your thought. You lose it somewhere between seeing Milo’s head resting on the couch next to you and feeling Billie pull you closer.

“I don’t know. I don’t--. I don’t want trouble. I probably won’t see him again.”

Billie is prepared to argue with you on this when her phone vibrates on the table nearby. You jump and cringe and Billie curses as she reaches for the annoying device to silence it. Billie briefly wonders who is calling her before 8 on a Sunday. Then she remembers that it’s Monday.

Still, it seems too early.

She sees it’s Michelle and she answers with a sigh as she shoots you an apologetic look.

“Hi, Michelle. How are you?”

You lean back against the couch trying not to eavesdrop, but it’s not hard to pick up on what Michelle is saying in an otherwise silent room.

“Hi Ms. Howard. I’m fine thank you. I wanted to check in after your night. See if you needed anything?”

You perk up slightly at this because Billie does too and it only takes you a few seconds to realize that she hadn’t told Michelle about what happened last night. Billie sighs as she immediately starts thinking about the damage that had been done in the media with last night’s incident.

“I’m fine. Thank you, Michelle. Unless you’re going to tell me that TMZ did a bit on Y/N’s hospital visit?”

There is an audible silence as Michelle figures out how to break the news to Billie. There had been numerous reports about your hospital visit and a couple of reporters had even gotten footage of you being wheeled out of the clinic and into the ambulance. She tells Billie this and you can feel her stiffen in anger with each word Michelle says.

“They are speculating wildly as usual, but no one has anything other than theories at this point. Would you like me to have Jeff make a statement?”

You are shaking your head the same time that Billie is. Although you’re not sure about filing a police report, you want to make that decision before you share anything with the media. Billie is on the same page as you and she tells Michelle to say nothing for now and to get back to her if anything changes.

Billie hangs up the phone, and not two seconds later you’re cursing.

“That didn’t take long.”

Part 15

#american horror story #ahs #ahs fic #ahs imagine #ahs murder house #my fic #billie dean howard x reader #billie dean howard imagine #billie dean howard #a little bit

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hyperfixationtimego · 4 years

Note

Happy little hcs to atone for my sins

Taka and Hina are study buddies

Sometimes Aoi manages to get Taka off track because she’s just so enthusiastic and wants to hear about all of her friends’ hyperfixations and special interests

37.2 minutes later

Taka’s infodumping about how he despises moral philosophy but also thoroughly enjoys it bc that’s how moral philosophers are

Or he’s infodumping about political science and debate tactics and how speeches were effective or not for various reasons

Sakura and Mondo work out together

It started off as a coincidence when they were in the gym at the same time but it kept happening so they called it a schedule

They talk about their SOs and they’re smiling

Sakura teaches Mondo certain stretches and exercises to help relax different muscle groups for whenever he pulls a muscle or has a flare up from the thing with the bikes

Leon constantly asks Chihiro to turn alter ego into a vocaloid or at least program a bit of that tech into their system

Bc he would rather shave his head again than talk to Sayaka about producing music

He just has so many ideas

And it’s cool when there are kinda punk rock songs that are covered in an 8-bit or a vocaloid style

Byakuya and Celeste have a small series of bets with low stakes about what their inferiors classmates will do to lead up to them jingling away morosely like the fools they are

Sayaka shamelessly advertises her group’s mercy to her classmates and friends

Everyone gets their nails painted at some point

Nobody knows how Byakuya got roped into it but it worked

Makoto has rainbow loom

Atua forgives you

anyway YEAH LEGIT?

Hina has fully and thoroughly fallen in love with all of her friends and classmates’ expressions whenever they’re talking about something that excites them omg 🥺

she sees someone rambling and having a good time and hears the enthusiastic pitch of their voice as well as the general Vibe™️ that they’re giving off and she just???? [Y E A R N]

and also just???? her and taka being study buddies is so valid oh my god??? they’re really close because of it!!! And Taka always loves hanging out with her because he knows she’ll let him just Talk??? and he adores that about her????? And she’ll be ENGAGED which!!!!!! oh my god!!!!?????

hi in this house we love and adore hina

And Sakura and Mondo???? absolutely?????

they have friendly competitions over who can lift the most weights/do the most reps/etc. (they do it sparingly, ofc! bc Sakura at least knows that they’ll both be subconsciously trying to beat the other as opposed to listening to what their bodies need in the moment. Sakura is the single braincell of class 78 no I won’t take it back because it’s true)

and they totally doooooo like they both get such cute loveydovey pining expressions whenever it’s Their Turn™️ to discuss the latest cute thing their partner(s) did. and listening to the other talking???? oh my god it’s literally the neatest thing????

Sakura looking at Mondo: I would die for this man

Mondo looking at Sakura: this woman is literally beauty and perfection in human form

THEY’RE SUCH GOOD FRIENDS OKAY???

also chihiro joins them for training sometimes!!!! She obviously isn’t able to do as much as the other two are, but both Sakura and Mondo are always so proud of her progress??? They’re like “you are so cool and strong do you know that??? you better know that”

and speaking of chihiro hdbdvdvdvdvdvdvdvd on GOD Leon will Not leave them alone abt it and they’re just like

“y....you do NOT have the attention span,.......you’re gonna get frustrated within like the first five minutes......and then I’ll have done all that work for nothing..............”

but Leon’s >:( no I won’t!!!! music is my Passion!!!!!!!!

so it’s like *sigh* okay

and anyway leon genuinely does rlly like it???? like he gets burned out very easily and can only compose things in short bursts, but he’s always so so so proud of the finished products??? (Even if nobody else likes it but shush 😌)

and it makes chihiro :D to know that something she made (even if it was done with reluctance) has brought one of her closest friends so much happiness????? she’s also like good for Leon but also if he ever bothers them about something like that again they are Literally Going to Snap but that’s another story for another day vwv

AND YEAH LIKE. HE DOESN’T MIND TALKING TO HER ABT MUSIC IN GENERAL BECAUSE IT’S AN INTEREST THEY SHARE (quite possibly one of the only times they will have a conversation without one constantly insulting the other ❤️) BUT. ADMITTING TO HER THAT HE NEEDS HELP WITH IT IS THE WORST HE HATES IT HE HATES IT HSBDBSBD

god okay so. his first impression of her when they had just come to hope’s peak and met for the first time was “oh my god!!! she’s a pop idol!!! so she must know a lot about music!!! maybe she’ll help me become a popular musician!!!” and her immediate reaction when she first heard him ask was to literally roll her eyes and he was like oh okay fuck her actually

and then slow burn enemies-to-friends 💛

WHEBDVSVS CELESTE AND BYAKUYA JUST BEING RICH ASSHOLES IS SO FUNNY??? LIKE THEY HAVE WEALTH SOLIDARITY AND THEY ACT ALMOST LIKE alright your status makes you worthy of my time, I suppose-

they’ve had bets on everything from how many times kirigiri will pass out from exhaustion by the end of the school day, to how long it’ll take before Kirumi finally Loses Her Shit, to how many people will be harmed by Komaeda’s luck while hanging out with him.

Mfs about to die smh

and dhdbwvwbsvwvwb yeah like??? sometimes a normal conversation with maizono will turn into her being like “yeah, and by the way, if you’re looking for a change of style and wardrobe, you should check out the newest shirt my band just released as part of our merch drop, and-”

Makoto is the one who gets baited into her merch ads most often sndbsbsbdbdbw

even mentioning the word “merch” around Leon or Kaz will earn her a lot of groaning and sighing, and occasionally a pillow or other soft object being hurled at her face 💛

oh my god they all have a manicure spa day,,,,,,,class bonding 🥺

hdbdvdvdv they got Jill to break into his dorm and kidnap him ngl like the specifics they gave her were something along the lines of “use as much force as you need to without killing him” and she was like “DONE”

and okay I’m not gonna talk abt everyone’s nails but now I’m thinking about it and like-

Sayaka gets like a lighter violet background with gold and white stars smattered around them, more concentrated in some areas than others, and it’s generally very pretty 🥺

chihiro’s are a different solid pastel color on each finger!!! it’s very kidcore and fun and they love it so muchhhh!!!

leon gets a little self-conscious when it’s his turn because his nails are highkey disgusting from all the time he spends playing baseball - there’s dirt trapped under them and everything so he’s just like hhhhhhh anxiety go brrrr but anyway he gets solid black because he’s edgy and cool like that 😎

I think Taka gets a French manicure with little dark red flowers pressed towards the tips because!!! simple yet pretty!!!

Celeste probably takes the longest because her request is sooooo complicated like it’s black and red and long ass acrylics with overlapping patterns and everyone else just kinda sits there feeling h o r r i b l e for that poor nail stylist

Toko gets a checkerboard pattern, with each nail having a different neon color in place of white!!! Because she knows that Jill will find it cool and pretty and colorful the next time she fronts (visual stimming jill?? 👀)

Togami just picks whatever will get him out of the chair quickest hdbsvdvdvdbdbdb

anyway Makoto????? rainbow loom????? absolutely

he has so many bracelets!!!!! so many so many so many and he knows how to create such a wide variety of styles it’s so cool!!!!!! he wears a bunch of them at any given time because they are so fun to fidget with!!!! and rubber texture hvvvvhvv!!!!

and he creates personalized ones for his friends, too, like he knows their favorite colors and sometimes picks up on whether they prefer a certain style or not from the way they react to the other ones he’s made and it’s!!! just so neat!!!!!

I’m thinking about it and!!! he has a bi pride fishtail, a trans pride arrow stitch, a black and neon green railroad, a pastel pink/blue/purple/yellow ladder, a jelly yellow and green dragon scale, a rainbow double cross, and a bunch more!!! he also has a bunch with charms and beads added into them!!!!

He also makes them for his friends even if he knows they won’t wear them!! Like Toko, for example, isn’t the biggest fan of jewelry because she doesn’t like the texture, but he creates one for her anyway and fills it with so much love (it looks like a daisy chain!!!! because at least she’ll be able to look at it and hold it and still be interested in it without it needing to be on her wrist!!!)

he makes a ton of bright colored ones for Mukuro (usually either single or inverted fishtail because he knows she wouldn’t enjoy wearing anything too heavy or overbearing) so that she has more mobile visual stims!!!

similar for Jill!! although most of hers tend to be black and bright neon rainbow in various bulkier styles!!!! Jill will also force him to let her look at his bracelet-covered arm whenever they hang out because. my god,,,,,,so many Colors™️

he’s found that togami prefers black and white simpler styles, and that Kyoko absolutely adores singles, fishtails, and double fishtails in any shade of purple, and that Mondo likes any of the larger styles in darker colors + blacks and grays!!! Chihiro loves anything with jelly and glitter bands!!!

Leon usually only wears one at a time, but he cycles through every single one that his boyfriend’s ever made for him because????? GOD they’re so cool and his boyfriend is so crafty and incredible and just,,,,,,,,,hvvvhvv every time he looks at the one he’s wearing he’s able to calm himself down and remember that Makoto loves him........it’s also very good for stim and fidgeting <3

anyways sorry yes Makoto with a rainbow loom is filling me with serotonin and it’s canon now

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mypoisonedvine · 4 years

Text

Double-Edged Sword: Capt. Syverson x Reader (Chapter 2)

(read the first chapter here)

Word Count: 5.5k (oh lordt I need to be stopped)

Taglist: @fantasygirlsuniverse @agniavateira @fcgrizi @stillreadingfantasy @itsjusttaralove @radaofrivia @p3nny4urth0ught5 @mary-ann84 @snatchedbylele @cheyentjj @maan24 @littlefreya

(emetophobia tw for this chapter)

You had no idea how you were going to survive meeting with him alone after this. Of course, you realized now that this was one of many reasons why what had happened was against the rules, but the realization came just a bit too late.

“Good morning, Captain,” you nodded.

“Call me Sy,” he requested.

“I’d rather not.”

“Alright, well, just know that every time you call me ‘Captain,’ it reminds me of the way you said it when you were bent over that desk,” he explained simply.

“Right,” you nodded. “So, Sy, tell me what you want to do with this mission.”

“You know what I want to do,” he shrugged, and for some reason your mind interpreted that very differently than he meant it. “Divide and conquer.”

“Of course,” you agreed. “I suppose that works.”

“I thought you hated that idea,” he recalled.

“But I really hate having to argue with you about it. Normally I’d fight harder for what I think is the best way. But I’m losing that motivation, suddenly.”

He gave you an over-dramatic pouty look, as if he was mocking you, and you frowned in return. “Aw, you don’t want to argue with me? Is the magic really gone so soon?”

You rolled your eyes. “The idea of any romantic sentiment between us is so outrageously implausible that it doesn’t even work in a sarcastic context.”

“Do you always talk like you’re readin’ an essay?” he frowned.

“You’re making fun of the way I talk?” you responded with an incredulous laugh. “You can’t see it, because it’s clear, but you’re currently sitting in a glass house. I would recommend against throwing stones.”

He laughed, and it sounded halfway between genuine amusement and mockery. “Were you up all night studying your vocab words, so you could better insult me?”

You know what I was doing last night, you instantly thought.

“Insulting you is so painfully easy. I don’t lose sleep over it, in fact, I bet I could do it in my sleep,” you said instead.

“I’m not sure you should be so proud of that. It’s like you go out of your way to make my life miserable,” he groaned.

You sighed, rubbing your temples in frustration. How had it only taken thirty seconds for the conversation to turn into mud-slinging once again? It seemed like no matter how hard you tried, you fell into this dynamic with him. Considering how it went last time, you wanted very much to end it here.

“I apologize. That’s not my intention,” you clarified. He seemed taken aback by that, clearly having prepared for another witty comeback (or at least, an attempt at one).

“Well,” he began, but then trailed off.

“Well?”

“Well, alright,” he finished.

“Well, alright, what?”

“Let’s discuss the mission,” he further explained, saying it as if it were obvious what he meant. You ignored the condescending tone and sat across from him at the table.

“Sit closer,” he offered.

“Not necessary,” you rebuffed.

He unrolled a map of the area for review, and it was incredibly small, so small that you couldn’t see it at all from your seat.

“You’re sure you don’t wanna come closer?”

You got up and moved, closer but still a seat apart from him. Suddenly you felt very aware of his presence-- not to say you somehow weren’t before, just that it was overpowering, that you felt like you could feel heat radiating off of him even though he wasn’t actually that close to you. You were also very aware of how large this room was, and how empty. It was just the two of you and a table, one clearly intended for larger conferences.

You had a somewhat civil discussion of the mission, but you were struggling to focus more than you possibly ever had before.

“You listenin’?” he prompted, and you jumped out of a daydream. The content of the daydream was irrelevant, of course, but it was thoroughly distracting.

“What? Um, yeah, sorry,” you mumbled.

“I’ve never been lost in thought about a mission before,” he chuckled.

“Well, it’s a complex issue…” you trailed off.

“What’s a complex issue?” he pressed.

“From which side to enter the compound,” you remembered.

“Almost had ya,” he frowned.

“I was paying attention,” you defended weakly.

His hand suddenly brushed against your waist and you jumped. You turned and realized he had leaned towards you, though you had no idea why.

“Don’t-” you began, and instantly he moved away.

“I’m sorry,” he said quietly, and you were a little surprised at the complete lack of sarcasm, and the apparent presence of guilt rather than guilt-tripping.

“It’s alright,” you soothed.

“Is it?” he asked with a slightly confused expression.

“It is. It shouldn’t be,” you smirked, “but it is.”

“That describes a lot of things these days.”

You decided not to investigate that topic.

“Anyways, the method of entry…” you redirected the conversation, and even that triggered some gutter-brained aspect of your psyche.

“Right, of course,” he nodded, turning back to the map.

The open-air “gym” (more like a bunch of random benches and assorted free weights, not much of a gym by your standards) was usually housed by only a few soldiers at a time, but as you walked by that afternoon, it was pretty busy. Getting closer you observed that nearly everyone was watching two guys- one Marine, one Army- do push-ups. Each group was cheering on their own, and you realized it was a competition of sorts. And nothing got you excited quite like a competition.

“I can’t, I’m out,” Private Jones, one of yours, weakly announced as he fell to the ground. The Marines booed and groaned but the Army soldiers cheered.

“How many was he at?” you asked one of the Marines.

“Just over a hundred,” he told you. You nodded in approval, even if he’d lost.

“Looks like Army takes the lead, again,” one of the soldiers announced to the crowd. “Next up, sit-ups.”

“There’s so few of us compared to them,” the Marine told you, “we are going to have to start sending in people who already competed.”

“I’m too tired, I don’t think I can go again,” Private Cooper sighed in exhaustion.

“There’s no way I can beat them at sit-ups, that was my weakest category at boot camp,” Private Jones added to the discussion.

“I can compete,” you offered. Everyone, including the Army guys, turned to you. “Are officers allowed in?”

The soldier you were supposed to go up against-- Private Hess, you were pretty sure was his name-- seemed incredulous.

“Fine by me,” he encouraged, clearly seeing it as a perfect opportunity since he was confident he would beat you.

“I need someone to hold my feet down,” you requested.

“I’ll do it,” you heard a Southern-twanged voice behind you, and lo and behold, there he was.

“I’m shocked you’re willing to help me,” you admitted.

“You’re going to get your ass handed to you,” Captain Syverson grinned, “and I want to see that up close.”

You and Hess laid on the ground a few feet apart, and the Captain took his spot in front of your legs, a hand on each boot. You hoped they were extra dirty just to spite him, but then again, he didn’t seem to mind getting dirty very much.

“Sy, you mind counting hers?” the apparent referee asked.

“Sure,” he grunted.

You saw Hess start so you did too, and the Captain counted them for you. You tried not to worry that he would miscount to try to set you back- you liked to think a guy like that believed in the sacred nature of exercise, even if he was a bastard.

It was weird to feel his touch on you, even through boots. It was much, much weirder that each time you sat up, your face was so close to his. Perhaps weirdest was how it made you feel to lay on your back and look up at him basically between your legs.

It was about 50 that you really started to feel it. At 100, the jeers of the crowd fell to silence as they watched closely for any signs of faltering. You heard Hess beside you, and he seemed to be staying pretty consistent, not even breathing that hard. Meanwhile, you were starting to remember why the requirements for men and women were different in this category.

150 was a turning point. You had a pretty good poker face, so everyone else seemed sure that the two of you were still neck-in-neck, but you knew Sy could see the cracks.

It must have been 200 that you heard yourself start to whimper and groan, while Hess was only just beginning to breathe heavily. You didn’t want to make noises of stress but at a certain point you had no choice.

You fell back to the ground at 237 and even though you were barely there a second, somehow the Captain figured out you were considering quitting.

“Keep going,” he whispered to you. You wanted to ask him why he was encouraging you but you didn’t want to give him away, since you could tell he hadn’t wanted anyone else to hear. You fought harder to keep pushing, though each time you came up was a little shakier, and accompanied with a louder noise of pain.

“Come on man, she’s about to quit,” you heard someone say to Hess.

“I don’t know, I’m starting to cramp up,” Hess told them in reply, and you almost laughed because you had been cramping up since 145.

You pushed through the pain and you were afraid your body would fail before your mind did, that you would reach the point of being physically unable to lift yourself. Your core muscles were so tired that pain began to radiate to your thighs and back, and you forced your eyes shut so you wouldn’t have to see your vision go spotty.

You tuned out all the noise except his voice counting. 263, 264, 265…

“I can’t,” you heard Hess groan.

“Come on, she’ll give out any minute!”

“Dude, it hurts!” he complained.

“You can take him,” Sy whispered to you.

“I know,” you whispered back.

It was 300 that he finally gave up.

“What the hell?! You were so close!” the Army boys protested.

“Fuck off,” he groaned as he stood up and pushed them away.

The Marines clapped and you smiled, falling back onto the ground and letting your arms rest.

Sy stood up, extending a hand to help you get up as well. You made a point of standing up without his assistance, even though your entire midsection was literally shaking. Thankfully it didn’t show through the loose-fitting fatigues. He looked like he had something to say, but apparently he didn’t, as you two just stood there in silence for a second.

“That was amazing, Major!” one of your Marines said, and you turned to him.

“Oh what? That was nothing,” you pshawed, even though you were beginning to feel dizzy and a bit nauseous.

In fact, you were suddenly feeling a lot nauseous. You made an excuse to get out of the conversation and slipped out of sight, finding a nearby building to duck behind. Instantly you fell on your knees and retched: you’d heard of this happening to poor enlisted at boot camp, where the constant movement of the abdominal muscles disturbed the stomach to the point of vomiting. Thankfully it wasn’t that severe, though you were very much looking forward to drinking some water and not moving for an hour or two.

Just as you wiped your mouth and stood up, there was Sy-- of course.

“Are you following me or something?” you asked him.

“I just came by to tell you you did a good job,” he explained, “but seems like it took a toll.”

“Sorry I’m not as strong as you expected,” you sighed.

“If you kept going long enough to lose your lunch on the ground… then you’re actually a lot stronger than I expected,” he disagreed.

You paused, not sure how to respond.

“What you think of me isn’t something I prioritize.”

“I know,” he replied. “I didn’t say that it was.”

“And yet, I’d guess that your caveman brain can’t comprehend that what I do has nothing to do with you,” you frowned.

He laughed and you fucking hated that. He never seemed to take you seriously, and he must have been able to tell how angry that made you.

“If you think that what you do has nothing to do with me,” he countered, “then you are much, much dumber than I expected.”

“You are so self-obsessed,” you groaned as you rolled your eyes.

“Maybe, but it doesn’t mean I’m wrong,” he shrugged, and walked away.

As you grabbed your tray of dinner and turned to face the mess hall, you suffered the same dilemma that you’d had basically every day since high school: is there anywhere I can sit?

You were never the sort of person who had a welcome seat at a table.

You saw room next to some of the women in your unit and figured it was the best you could do.

“Hey, I heard you out-crunched Hess today,” Private Feng greeted you, “congrats!”

“It was sit-ups, and he’s a pussy, but thanks,” you smirked. She smiled back.

The two Marines across from you were whispering to each other and giggling. “What are you two talking about?” you asked them as you sat down.

“Oh, nothing,” Private Gonzalez answered, but she couldn’t even keep a straight face and started blushing.

“The hell is this, summer camp?” you groaned. “Seriously, you two are Marines, not Girl Scouts.”

“Fine, fine,” the other-- Private Matthews-- relented, “we were talking about the hottest guys on base.”

“Maybe you actually are Girl Scouts,” you scowled.

“Stop being a Major and just be a woman for five seconds,” Gonzalez requested. Feng and Matthews seemed to react strongly to that, like they were afraid to get in trouble for speaking freely. You sighed, and motioned for them to continue the conversation.

“What do you think of Captain Syverson?” Matthews asked Gonzalez, but somehow you found yourself butting in.

“Syverson?!”

“Yeah, he’s totally sexy, right?” Matthews prompted.

“He’s totally an asshole,” you frowned, putting on a slightly-condescending impression of Matthews’ voice.

“Okay, yeah,” Gonzalez admitted, “but aside from that. I mean, look at him.”

“Aside from that? I’m supposed to just ignore his personality?”

“Honestly,” Matthews began, looking over to where Sy was sitting and looking at him with eyes that were hungry for a lot more than what was on her plate, “with a body like that, he doesn’t need a personality at all, let alone a good one.”

The other girls giggled but you felt an unfamiliar sensation burn under your skin. Jealousy? No, never.

“Don’t you agree?” she prompted you, and the girls looked to you for a response as if it were something deeply important.

“You didn’t hear it from me,” you whispered, leaning in so as not to be heard by others, “but I’m pretty sure he’s gay.”

The girls all sighed and slumped down, going back to their food with a lot less joy than they’d had before. You, meanwhile, enjoyed your food in silence.

Normally you were the sort of person who worked late into the night, but after such an exhausting day, you wanted to get back to your quarters and slip into bed as soon as humanly possible.

The one thing you probably hated most about deployment was the showers. Normally a hot shower sounds great, but when you keep in mind that the water for the showers was heated simply by the outside temperature, you realize that it’s not refreshing at all. Very rarely did you feel truly clean out here.

Your strategy was to let yourself air dry, something that only worked when you had a private bedroom which, thank the heavens, you did at this base.

Of course it’s when you’re naked and dripping all over the floor that there’s a loud knock at your door.

“Gimme a sec!” you shouted out, dashing to grab the nearest clothes-- a tank top and athletic shorts, more revealing than you would normally go for but significantly less revealing than nudity-- and throw them on.

You opened the door the second you were decent, and at this rate you weren’t even surprised to see him.

“Just can’t seem to shake you, can I?” you groaned. He looked at you with wide eyes.

“You look so different in civilian clothes,” he observed.

“It can’t be that different.” “I’m more flustered by this than seeing you naked,” he admitted.

“Is that an insult?” you asked.

“No,” he said quickly, and you nodded. “Can I come in?”

You honestly thought about saying no. He still hadn’t said why he was here. But the way he looked at you had apparently corroded your judgment. You stepped aside and he entered; you let the door shut behind him.

“You’re not wearing a bra,” he observed.

“Yeah, well, neither are you. And your tits are bigger than mine,” you smiled.

“Touche,” he chuckled.

“Can I… help you?” you prompted.

“You did a good job, earlier today,” he congratulated.

“You already mentioned that,” you pointed out.

“I shouldn’t have volunteered to hold your feet down,” he admitted. “The sounds you made were… distracting.”

“Shouldn’t have come as much of a surprise to you,” you smirked, “you’d already heard me sound like that. Could’ve just searched your memory for it.” “Well, the memory is pretty distracting, too,” he smiled.

“Your poor attention span is not my problem, Capt- uh, Sy,” you mumbled nervously.

He stepped closer to you and you stepped back.

“Are you scared of me?” he asked.

“No,” you answered.

“Then why’re you runnin’ away?” he pressed. You wondered if he was being literal or metaphorical.

“I’m not running away,” you explained, “I just don’t want to make the same mistake twice.”

“I’m not so convinced it was a mistake,” he explained.

“You can’t- ugh, you are so…” You started over. “You can’t just keep being a shit to me 23 hours a day, and then suddenly decide you have some love-hate crush on me and expect me to spread my legs.”

He stepped forward again and you were forced to press against the wall. He leaned into you until you were pressed into the corner; It must have been a minute that you two just stood there in silence, his eyes scanning you with fierce intensity, and you looking back with what you hoped wasn’t the deer-in-the-headlights expression that you almost certainly had. His body against yours was such a strange and addictive feeling, and the short sleeves of his t-shirt made it hard to ignore the enormous arms that blocked you into the cramped space.

“You want me,” he said, and you couldn’t tell if it was a statement or just a deadpan question.

“Yes,” you agreed with a raspy voice, squirming against the wall.

“You need me to fuck you, right now,” he continued. You nodded. “Say it,” he demanded.

“Please fuck me,” you begged, swallowing nervously.

He weaved a hand into your hair, his thumb rubbing over your cheek. He leaned down to kiss you and you closed your eyes, but just a second later you felt him step back and his hand pull away.

You opened your eyes in confusion to find him grinning at you with crossed arms.

“Looks like I can,” he announced. Realization dawned, and quickly turned to fury. As always, it was all a part of some fucking game for him.

“What the hell is wrong with you?”

“So, so much,” he smiled.

“You get off on humiliating women, is that it?”

“Not women,” he corrected, “just you.”

“Well, congrats,” you frowned, “because you won! Nothing could be more humiliating than being attracted to you.”

“You know, I really only just wanted to take you down a peg because Marines always act so high n’ mighty,” he explained, finally looking a little frustrated which was comforting for your own anger. “I wasn’t planning on taking it this far. But it’s just too fun.”

You scoffed, but decided his backstory just didn’t add up.

“Hmm, I don’t think that’s it,” you announced, and he quirked an eyebrow in anticipation. “I think you have some horrible achy feelings, and you’re just trying to prove I need you as bad as you need me.”

He didn’t say anything, but his jaw clenched. You smiled.

“Well, newsflash, I don’t. You’re just some underclassman to me, a very out-of-character blip in my sexual history.”

He started to speak but you spoke over him.

“I mean, good for you! You get to say you lived the fantasy, fucked a higher-ranking officer, had some wild desert sex. And me? Well,” you grinned, “I won’t say anything. Because you are just… humiliating.”

You saw the anger in his eyes and had to fight back the desire to laugh. The upper-hand was always shifting between you two, and even if you knew it was temporary, it felt really good to have it back.

He stormed up to you and grabbed you by the neckline of your top, pulling you into an intense, aggressive kiss. Your hands instantly flew to his hips as you pulled him closer by his belt.

Goodbye, upper-hand, you thought to yourself, it was fun while it lasted.

His hands roamed your body as if he’d been waiting a thousand years to touch you again even when it had only been less than a day. The two of you stumbled back until you sat on your bed, but he stayed standing and towered over you, having to bend down to keep from breaking the kiss.

One hand slipped down between your legs and even though it stayed outside your shorts, he still managed to find your clit instantly and press his fingers against it. You whimpered, the sound lost into the kiss, and the fingers just had to push the fabric of your shorts to slide over your clit. You were embarrassed at how wet you were, but somehow the embarrassment just made you feel even more aroused so it was a vicious cycle.

He pressed two fingers into you and you moaned, breaking the kiss.

“Humiliating?” he remembered. “You wish it was someone else doin’ this to you?”

“Not someone else,” you corrected, “anyone else.”

He growled and pressed his fingers deeper into you until you whimpered. His touch was rough but not painful, aggressive but not forceful, and it made you feel something you’d never felt before (or if you had, you’d forgotten).

“Get on your knees,” you commanded him. He raised an eyebrow but didn’t move. “Did I stutter?”

“Or what?” he asked.

“Get on your knees, or leave.”

He dropped instantly, kneeling on the floor in front of you. You sat back as he grabbed the waistband of your shorts and pulled them off. You spread your legs and he instantly dove into you.

“Oh, fuck,” you moaned, your head falling back. His tongue explored you and his hands gripped at your thighs to pull you closer. He moaned and grunted against your skin and the vibrations shot straight through you.

Your hand grabbed his head just as your hips bucked against his face, pushing his tongue deeper inside you.

“Yes,” you gasped. You felt him smile against you and his teeth grazed your clit sending jolts and shivers up your spine. “Oh, god, fuck,” you groaned.

A few guys had done this to you before, but none of them had done it with this much enthusiasm, certainly. He looked like he was having the time of his life down there-- he looked back up at you and your eyes met, and you wondered if you looked like you were having the time of your life, because you were.

His mouth worked you with such precision, taking you apart piece by piece with mastery and expertise, to the point that you couldn’t believe how well he knew your body already.

“I-I’m close,” you whimpered.

He glared at you as if to say ‘I know.’

You felt your legs start to shake but his hands gripped them to keep them still. Every sensation became so intense, too intense in the best possible way, and Sy showed no sign of stopping.

You weren’t sure if you came more than once, or if you just came for a really, really long time. What you were sure of, sadly was that this was going to make staying away from him so much harder.

His lips moved away from your clit and kissed the inside of your thighs. It was a disappointment and a relief simultaneously, somehow.

He slapped your leg suddenly-- not very hard, but hard enough that you yelped in surprise. He came up from kneeling and started to work on his belt. You just watched him as you tried to catch your breath, and involuntarily bit your lip as he freed his cock from his jeans.

“Want me to fuck you?” he asked in a low growl.

“Last time you asked that, it was a trick question,” you remembered, “so I’m a little hesitant to answer.”

“Alright,” he whispered as he leaned close, his breath warm against your ear, “I’m going to fuck you, Major. Would you like that?”

“Take your shirt off,” you demanded suddenly. He growled, leaning back and quickly pulling it over his head. You smiled.

“Are you done bossin’ me around?” he asked with a frown.

“Just fuck me,” you begged.

“Well, I can’t say no to that,” he grinned, roughly pulling your hips forward and kneeling on the bed between your legs. He used one hand to hold your face up, forcing you to look at him, as the other slid his cock into your folds. He pressed into you slowly, excruciatingly slowly, in fact, and you felt very self-conscious as he watched your face closely.

Even as you tried to suppress your reaction, you were sure you could feel every detail of him as he entered you and the effort was futile.

“You look beautiful like this,” he murmured, and you felt yourself blush.

“Like what?” you managed to ask through heavy breaths.

“Desperate.”

When he was fully inside you, you were confident there was none of you left to take, literally and metaphorically. The way your body accepted him with just enough ease that there was no pain, and yet he pushed you to your limits until your head began to spin… it felt like you were made for each other.

“Yeah,” he agreed, and you hadn’t realized you had said the last part aloud.

As he moved inside you, you started to process that it was all a little too slow, a little too… sensual for your tastes. Not to say you didn’t love it, because you did-- it was that you loved it too much, it made your heart ache in a way you preferred not to deal with at the moment.

“Faster, please,” you whimpered.

“No,” he sternly replied.

“Please,” you begged again. You tried to give him your best doe eyes and pouty lip, a face nobody could say no to.

“Say my name,” he demanded in reply.

You still had some shred of defiance left, apparently, because you were trying to make this less personal and here he was turning it into something it wasn’t.

“Make me,” you whispered.

His hand wrapped around your neck and you uselessly gasped for air, already feeling your face tingle from the lack of blood flow. He didn’t stay long though, pushing you back onto the bed and, finally, fucking you hard.

“Yes!” you yelped.

“Say my name,” he demanded again, grabbing your hips.

“Fuck you,” you growled. He probably realized that he was giving you what you wanted by punishing you for that, but he didn’t seem to mind, roughly rubbing his thumb against your clit.

“Oh god,” you groaned, arching your back.

"So fuckin' good," he groaned.

You felt your orgasm coming on way too quickly, even when you’d already gotten off when he ate you out.

“Say my name,” he asked one last time,

“Sy,” you moaned, “Sy, baby, don’t stop.”

You started to lean your head back but he grabbed your face and forced you to meet his gaze.

“You’d better look at me when I make you come,” he instructed.

You obeyed but it made it so much harder to keep from screaming which was rather inconvenient with enlisted sleeping not too far away.

“You’re so fuckin’ cute,” he announced, and the severity of his tone was mismatched with the sensitivity of his words, “and all mine.”

Your gut twisted in the most delicious way. “Yours,” you agreed fervently, “I’m yours, Sy.”

He smiled as if he was actually surprised, when you thought it had been pretty obvious.

"Sy, I- I'm gonna-" you stuttered.

"Come for me," he said darkly and you weren't sure if it was a command or if he was just finishing your sentence. Regardless, it was very effective.

You unintentionally held your breath and your orgasm hit you so hard that you feared you would pass out or something. Instead your entire body quivered and jerked and you made a noise you were confident that you had never made before in your whole life. He fucked into you as hard as ever, but leaned down, wrapping his arms around you and holding you close. Your nails dug into his shoulders but he didn’t seem to mind.

“Inside me,” you managed to beg through the haze of pleasure, “please come inside me.”

He growled and held you so tight that you couldn’t breathe very well but it was worth it as you felt him flex inside you and heard him moan-- not a grunt, not a sigh, but a true, proper moan, and it was the best thing you’d ever heard.

His movements slowed to a stop and you just listened to the sound of his breathing. He rolled off of you after a moment and you laid side by side, staring at the ceiling.

“Is this the part where you kick me out?” he asked quietly after a moment.

“I mean, it’s not like you can stay,” you replied. He sighed and sat up on the bed, and if you didn’t know better you’d say he looked dejected-- heartbroken, even. “But, you don’t have to leave right now,” you offered.

“That’s my reward? I don’t have to leave thirty seconds after we fuck?”

You swallowed. “I… I didn’t realize you wanted to stay.”

“I can take a hint, Major,” he frowned, looking back at you. “I’ll go.”

“No, Sy-” you began, and he relaxed a bit. “I just meant that you couldn’t stay the night. It’s just too risky, you know, we could get caught-”

“Right,” he nodded.

“But I don’t want you to leave,” you admitted.

He smiled and leaned down over you, brushing a hand through your hair.

“Do you want me to stay?” he pressed.

“Just for a while, we can just… talk,” you shrugged.

“Then say it,” he requested.

It wasn’t until that moment that you finally understood why he was always asking you to say that you wanted him aloud. You had just assumed it was a dominance thing, one more tool in his “ways to piss her off and make her feel like an idiot” kit. But you saw now that he was insecure, that he wouldn’t believe you wanted him unless you made it abundantly clear. Now, what would make a guy like him insecure, that was a mystery for another day.

“I want you to stay, Sy,” you said firmly. He kissed you, and it was oddly sweet, sort of domestic even. You had to force yourself not to tense up when you processed that this was a boyfriend/girlfriend sort of kiss, rather than a fuck-buddy kiss or an enemies-with-benefits kiss. You let your hand reach up and wrap around the back of his neck, pulling him in even more. Of course, that was the exact moment he decided to pull back.

“Don’t get greedy,” he scolded with a grin.

“Don’t get snarky,” you returned.

And when he kissed you again you felt that part of your brain screaming at you. This is a terrible idea, you can’t come back from this, all your relationships get fucked up.

But there was another part of you, perhaps your heart, that responded, at least this one can’t get fucked up, because it started fucked up.

#my writing #syverson x reader #captain syverson x reader #henry cavill x reader

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duchessfics · 4 years

Text

Birthday Headcanons!

So my birthday was technically May 23...which is over a month ago 🙈 but for my birthday I wanted to type these headcanons up. Honestly each of these have no real connection to each other except I’ve just thought of them over time, but I just thought these would be fun to read. So I hope you enjoy them as much as I have when writing these up! 😁

Billie Dean Howard

This filming trip has been a nightmare for Billie. She hardly got any content for her show, her rental car broke down while driving back to the hotel after a whole night of filming, and the next day rather than calling the rental car company, her assistant calls some local mom and pop garage to fix it.

So rather than taking the risk of having her assistant screw something else up, Billie goes to the garage herself. And she is sure that the mechanic will charge her more since she’s both a celebrity and a single woman with no one to back her up.

When the medium gets there the garage is completely devoid of any other people and the only sign of someone here is the radio blasting from the garage. So, after seeing absolutely no one for five minutes, she decides to just walk into the working area fully annoyed at the terrible service.

Fortunately, she hears the man whistling to the music and struts over to see him working underneath the car. However, Billie interrupts his moment, loudly clearing her throat and saying excuse me in the snippiest tone she can muster. That makes him stop whistling and roll out from under the car.

But Billie is shocked that this mechanic is no man. Oh no, you are a gorgeous woman even with smears of grease and dirt on your face and clothes. And this is the moment Billie realizes the appeal of butches.

When you roll out from under the car you assume this gorgeous woman is Billie judging by her fancy appearance and get up to introduce yourself. However, as you reach out to shake her hand you remember how dirty you are and back up, so you don’t get something on her clothes.

While Billie was filled with anger just minutes ago at her car being fixed, now she’s both surprised and unexpectedly aroused. You turn down the radio, knowing it’s obnoxiously loud and tell her you contacted the rental car company and they’re covering the cost of repairs, but you won’t be able to finish tonight so she’ll have to wait until tomorrow to drive the repaired car.

Then you throw out the offer in your own desire to see her that you have a spare room if her hotel reservation doesn’t have an extra night. Before you can even finish your sentence, Billie says yes and you would be lying if you denied your own joy at that.

So you tell her you’ll be done in a couple hours and ask if she wants to be dropped off somewhere while you work. But Billie says no. So you set out a clean chair for her to sit in before going back to work.

As you work you ask Billie what she’s doing in a small town like this. So she tells you about her TV show and when you find out she’s a medium you ask about it. At first Billie is hesitant to keep talking, but you assure her you love hearing her talk about her career.

So she tells you about everything—from her career to her checkered past and future desires. And in the process, she ends up sharing things about her life she’s never told anyone. But for some reason she just trusts you and doesn’t feel condemned or judged because of what she says.

The two hours fly by, but you’ve made substantial progress and tell Billie she should be able to head back home before noon tomorrow. However, after meeting you she is not so eager to leave anymore.

When wrapping up your work, you go through closing the garage and Billie observes you the whole time. You notice her checking you out as you walk around and work, but don’t mind. In fact you can’t help but check her too.

Then you lead her out to your old pickup truck and quickly clean out the passenger side while apologizing for your messy car. But she doesn’t seem bothered. She’s too occupied with you to notice anything else.

As you drive home, you ask if she minds music and Billie says no. So you turn on the radio to a classic rock station. Then you absentmindedly start to sing along and Billie nearly swoons at the whole thing. No one has ever had this effect on her before. She’s supposed to be the one who makes others swoon. Not the other way around…But she likes it.

When you get to your home you coyly explain you need to take a shower before making dinner. But you mention that you don’t mind if she joins. Let’s just say...Billie jumps on the opportunity (and you) and even though she wasn’t that dirty, Billie takes special joy in washing you off and massaging away any tension or soreness you have.

After taking a shower that’s long enough for the water to run cold, you both step out and since Billie doesn’t have extra clothes you offer one of your old, oversized Harley Davison shirts to wear. Seeing her only wearing your shirt that falls about mid-thigh on her does things to you and when she sees you so effected she starts to get bold in her flirting too.

In the end you warm up some cheap, frozen meal that’s nothing fancy, but the whole time you’re getting it together, Billie is wrapped around you, hugging you from behind or your side earning the nickname “spider monkey.” When you actually sit to eat both of you watch the other closely with shared grins and small giggles. Then cleaning up is super easy with Billie’s help and you head over to your living room.

You sit in your recliner as usual and Billie pauses for a moment looking between you and the couch. But her eyes linger on you longer and seeing the debate in her head leads you to hold out your hand toward her, offering a solution. She takes it with a smile and you guide her to sit on your lap.

Once again she’s used to being the caretaker, but is glad to let someone else take the lead and easily cuddles into you as the tv plays. And although now words are spoken, the way you hold her in a warm embrace makes Billie no longer regret this trip. In fact, she may stay a couple more days if it means being with you.

Lana Winters

While you and Lana can’t get married or have an official wedding in the 1970s, you solidify your relationship by buying a house together.

It’s an old, cottage-like home without any prying neighbors around to spy on you both. When you first enter the home, in your excitement you pick Lana up and carry her bridal style across the threshold for the first time.

While you have the keys to the house, there’s still a lot of work to do to the point that it’s not livable yet. So you and Lana take the time to look around the home deciding how to decorate and design your home. Then you begin to clean the house.

Both of you work hard on dusting, vacuuming, and wiping down every surface in your home leaving you both sore. Luckily when you return to the apartment you currently live in both of you take a nice hot bath to soothe your sore muscles. And it’s good to just spend time relaxing together.

Once you finish cleaning, you work on painting and decorating each room with different vibrant colors. Fortunately, Lana brings her radio so you can both listen to music while painting. But it’s still exhausting work and leaves you crabby sometimes if you go too long without a break.

So when Lana notices you starting to look worn out or tired, she’ll set down her paint-roller before guiding you to set yours down. Then she’ll pull you into a spontaneous dance. Sometimes it’s slow and relaxed, and other times the music is fun and upbeat. Either way it does help you to feel better.

Even though both of you aren’t conventionally attractive at the moment, you have never felt more attracted to Lana with her barefaced, thoroughly worn overalls with paint speckled on them, and a simple ponytail. And she loves seeing you like this too, finding something about simple domesticity to be beautiful.

The day you and Lana are finished painting, you start to pack up all of your belongings and slowly move them over to the house. It takes 5 trips between the places and even then you have the unfortunate realization that your mattress won’t fit into your car. So after wrestling with the bed for over an hour to no avail, you both are spent and give up.

Thankfully, Lana is a literal angel and when she sees you on the verge of tears, she runs out to bring home food from your favorite diner. And as she enters with the food you nearly cry in happiness. Then you eat your first meal on the floor since your table is covered in boxes.

After dinner before you can even ask, Lana guides you to climb into her lap and holds you close to her while you both take a moment to rest and listen to the radio. Even though you still have to set up your home it’s such a good feeling having everything here...well almost everything.

Because you couldn’t bring the bed over, you’re stuck with figuring out another option. So you unpack your blankets and pillows before laying them out on your carpeted floor in the living room.

Then you and Lana take a shower to unwind from the day and change into your pajamas. And even though it isn’t quite dark yet you slide under the covers and cuddle into each other, completely exhausted.

Once you’re settled you are finally able to hear the outside noises and it’s so different compared to ambient city sounds and you’ve never stayed out in the countryside before. So with each animal sound or gust of wind you perk up and grip on her while whisper asking if Lana heard it too.

She chuckles at your reaction and soothes that you’re safe with her. And to give you a small distraction from the eerie silence you talk about future house plans and keep softly talking until you both naturally fall asleep.

While you’re on the floor and it’s nowhere near as comfortable as your bed, you both sleep like rocks from working hard all day and end up getting more than 8 hours of sleep with no nightmares to haunt Lana’s dreams.

The next morning you wake up to the sun shining in your eyes and Lana lazily rubbing your back as you rest on her chest. All of the sounds, smells, and sights around you are almost mystical compared to the city. But you can definitely get used to this.

You ask if you’re preventing her from getting up, but she says no and holds you closer while you both talk about different things, enjoying the unfamiliar, but pleasant feeling of the cool morning air and environment.

Eventually you do get up to make breakfast and while you’re on pancake flipping duty, Lana rummages around to find the coffee maker to make some. Fortunately, she finds it and brews some for both of you to drink.

You eat your breakfast on the floor like last night before slowly beginning to unpack the boxes and setting up your home. And by the evening you are able to eat dinner at your table. Also, you somehow managed to finagle your bed into the car and set it up to sleep in for tonight.

Tonight both of you are much less tired so when you head to bed and Lana mentions that you haven’t technically christened the home yet. You are more than happy to make love in your new home for the first time without having to hold back or be quiet since there aren’t neighbors around.

(https://duchessfics.tumblr.com/post/617775020854345728/gaia-ki-cordelia-saying-i-love-you-to-misty)

Cordelia Goode

Is Cordelia the supreme? Yes. Did her wisdom teeth still grow in for some reason? Also, yes. Because they’re starting to cause problems, she visits the dentist and they recommend getting them removed. The only thing is she needs someone to drive her and take care of her while she heals but she doesn’t want to make a big deal out of it.

Mallory is busy with Coco, Zoe with Madison, Misty is off with Stevie god knows where, and Queenie knows of your crush for the supreme even if you won’t admit it. She’s seen you two tip toe around the topic and decides to volunteer you for the job so you’ll finally admit your feelings for her.

Honestly if Cordelia trusted anyone to take care of her it would be you. On the way to the dentist she’s eerily quiet. But even as the supreme, Cordelia is still human and feels anxious about the surgery. And in the car ride she drinks a tea she personally concocted with specific leaves to help wane her immunity as the supreme. It’s not that her powers are lost, they’re just dulled enough for the anesthesia to work.

By the time you’re at the office, her supremely glow is gone and to you she almost looks physically different. But you know the tea worked so both of you walk in and you keep on high alert for any possible threat towards your supreme.

Shortly after signing in they call Cordelia back to begin the process. You automatically stand up to go with her, but pause to ask if she even wants that. Before you can even finish your sentence, she takes your hand to keep you close.

Cordelia continues to hold your hand while she sits in the patient’s chair and the dentist explains what’s going to happen. And when they ask if she has any follow up questions, she’s too nervous to think of any, but you ask about a couple things that she’s grateful you think of.

Then they say they’ll get her ready for the removal. So you wish her luck trying to sound calm, but walk out to the waiting room feeling anxious as well. Within an hour the dentist comes out to you and says everything went well and she’s slowly waking up. So they let you go to her and tell you to take your time getting her up.

When you walk in and see your supreme reclined on the patient’s chair, she looks high as a kite. And your appearance makes her mumble something about her girlfriend. That catches your attention and you hesitantly ask who she’s talking about.

The question makes her have a fit of laughter however she groans in pain so you rush up to her to settle her back down. Then she clings to your hand and says with her mouth full of gauze that you’re her girlfriend because she loves you.

Or in her words she “loves you so, so, so, so, infinitely so’s y/n. Wait infinity loves. I loves infinity--wait I love infinitely. Y/n—fuck—I love you infinitely, infinity x infinity.” And you can’t help but giggle at your supreme confessing her love so clumsily.

But you quickly regret that when she begins to cry thinking you’re making fun of her. Before she gets too worked up you kneel before her and apologize saying you weren’t trying to make fun of her. You just thought she was cute.

For some reason those words provoke her to try to sit up before standing up, but you snap into action and keep her from doing so, unsure if she even could stay standing at the moment. In response she tries to resist while growling with her mouth full of gauze that she’s the fucking supreme. And before she gets upset enough to trigger her powers you assure her that you know she’s the supreme and ask once she’s resettled ask how she feels.

That leads her to relax and tell you how she’s feeling. But as she does instead of using normal pet names towards you like “sweetheart” or “darling” she keeps calling you poptart and cheese-it. Both of which she never even eats.

Fortunately one of the dental assistants brings in the take home kit with instructions. Then you help Cordelia up and slowly make your way home. But it takes everything in you to not laugh at her behavior.

When you get back to the house, you manage to sneak Cordelia to her room without running into anyone and by the time you coax her to gargle saltwater, take pain meds, and change her gauze she’s completely exhausted and you are too. So you prop her up so she doesn’t hurt her mouth when she sleeps before laying beside her on the bed. And the last thing she says is, “Love you, pop tart.” before you both fall asleep.

By the time you wake up to give Cordelia the second dose of pain medicine she already has her supremely glow back and is way more recovered than the average person. But you still. Help and feed her a small meal to prevent nausea. Then you help her gargle saltwater and replace the gauze and she passes out again.

24 hours later Cordelia is almost completely healed and takes care of herself. However she never mentions anything about what she said and doesn’t act differently whatsoever. You try to as well, but you just can’t forget her words. So you go to Zoe and explain what happened. She encourages you to be honest with the supreme and see how she responds. Then she assures you that Cordelia won’t be upset. If anything she has a soft spot for you.

That afternoon when you see Cordelia alone in the greenhouse you come out and hesitantly explain what she said the other day, but you also recognize that it was the anesthesia talking. While she didn’t remember that, she does admit she has feelings for you, and you admit you have feelings for her. So you decide to try going out on a date and she promises you that she won’t call you ‘pop tart.’ again.

(https://stoneharts.tumblr.com/post/101329124928/bette-being-a-cutie-pie-in-4x04-edward-mordrake)

Bette and Dot Tattler

When you find out Bette and Dot have never been to the beach before you’re shocked because they live in Florida. But you also make a point to take them to one.

One day you wake them up while it’s dark and have them get dressed before leading them to your packed car. You know they aren’t big fans of surprises so when they sleepily what’s happening you say you’re going to the beach.

When Bette and Dot find out they’re both excited and nervous about sneaking out. But you assure them it’s a day off for everyone and you told Eve what you’re doing so she could explain where you are if anyone asks. So they happily get into your car.

You drive to a virtually private beach and lay out a blanket on the sand. Then the 3 of you sit together to watch the sunrise. For now you sit beside Dot and hold her hand, smiling as you hear their gasps of amazement.

Once the sun is fully risen you tell them to stay put and go back to the car. Then you bring back a breakfast you packed to share with them. Bette and Dot knew you loved them both, but they are still shocked at how thoughtful and considerate you are unlike nearly everyone else in their lives.

By the time you finish eating it’s fully light out so you can really see the full expanse of the Atlantic Ocean now. You offer to take them closer honestly Bette and Dot haven’t swam in years and have never been to a body of water large enough that you can’t see the other side. So, they’re a little apprehensive.

You promise to stay with them the whole time and hold Bette’s hand as you murmur soothing words over the roar of the ocean and guide them closer.

When you get to the damp sand where waves briefly touch enough to change the texture, both Bette and Dot freeze up and won’t move. So you try to comfort them by saying you’ll step up first. Then you let go of Bette’s hand and walk only a couple steps away.

Both sets of eyes watch the waves rush over your feet and you assure them with a smile you’re ok and they will be too. Then you hold out your hands and beckon them closer. They cautiously step closer into the soaked and more shifty sand and Bette takes one of your hands while Dot takes the other.

When the water rushes over their feet they gasp and back up a little at the cold temperature. But you slowly guide them back and soothe it won’t be as cold this time.

They’re skeptical, but when the next wave comes and flows over all of your feet Bette and Dot don’t back away like last time. And when you ask if they’re ok and they say yes with cute little grins on their faces.

After a couple more waves all three of you walk back to your stuff and both women comment about the sand that gets stuck on their wet feet. So you pamper Bette and Dot by wiping their feet clean with a towel when you sit back on the blanket.

When it gets to mid-morning you pull out the matching sun hats you bought for them so they have some protection from the sun. Then the three of you go between lounging on the blanket and going to dip your feet in the water.

Eventually you bring out the lunch you packed and enjoy the meal of different sandwiches, fruit, and of course Bette’s favorite—cupcakes. And as the 3 of you eat and giggle with each other you notice how happy they look.

After you return the picnic basket to the car, you lead Bette and Dot back to the ocean. But this time you urge them a little further into the water. Unfortunately, there isn’t a swimsuit for them to wear and the only thing they have to wear is their dress. So you keep yours on too and keep them steady whenever the waves come.

Because they can’t really swim that well you only go out until the water meets your knees and hug them close while softly encouraging them, knowing how nervous they are. Thankfully the water is calmer today so you help them to lower into the water and they get excited that they look ‘normal’ because the water is high enough to make their heads look separate from each other.

You understand their joy about for once in their lives not looking like freaks, but also assure them that you love them both just as they are. Bette and Dot will always be your girls. Then you help them stand back up and lead them back to your spot before setting up an umbrella to block out some of the afternoon sun.

Then you lay out on the blanket and hold your lovers close to your chest while you dry off. The warmth of the sun feels like a blanket in itself and you end up falling asleep.

When you wake back up, you panic at Bette and Dot being nowhere near you assuming the worst. But the wind carries their laughter and you look to see them standing by the water and they have their ankles submerged. So you walk over and see they look so happy with slightly burned pink noses and cheeks from the sun. Even Dot looks unusually happy.

Then the sisters thank you for taking them and making the day so special. And you assure both women you’re more than happy to do that for them before giving each woman a kiss. And while you need to head back to the freak show you promise to bring them back to the beach again.

Sally McKenna

After walking in to see your partner cheating on you in your own home you run off devastated. That’s how you end up stumbling into the Hotel Cortez, barely holding yourself together.

The first thing you do is tearfully check into the hotel and that’s when Sally notices you from the balcony. And after getting your room key you stumble up to the bar where Sally sits. But you don’t even notice her, lost in your own emotional state.

After ordering a drink you find yourself hiding your face and trying to be quiet when you cry and drink. But it’s clear to anyone around that you are miserable.

So Sally meanders over, preying on your vulnerable state, and claiming you as her next victim to kill. When she greets you and mentions your crying, you completely break down while explaining that you caught your partner having sex with someone else.

Then you mention how everyone always ends up leaving you behind in the end. Sally is caught off guard by the comment since she’s usually the one to say that. But she just assumes you’re trying to trick her only to take advantage of Sally with your tears. So she keeps buying you drinks to dull your senses and kill you.

Once you seem drunk enough Sally tells you she has an idea “to keep you distracted.” Of course she meant that in a seductive way. But her sultry, suggestive tone goes completely over your head and you say sure before leading her to your hotel room.

When you enter the room you ask if she’s ever seen your favorite childhood movie. The random question throws Sally off but she answers no, already working on removing her coat and deciding on how to kill you.

Luckily with the freshly renovated hotel the TVs include streaming services, so you fall/hop onto the bed while excitedly telling her it’s on Netflix. Sally stops undressing when she sees you using the remote to find it and asks if you are seriously going to watch a dumb kids movie.

Her harsh tone makes you get emotional again and you pathetically whimper that you really like the movie, but you won’t make her stay and watch, knowing it’s lame. And something about your genuinely broken spirit makes her pause.

Then she hesitantly says she’ll watch it, hoping you’ll pass out soon and killing you will be a lot easier. So you pat the bed inviting her closer and she slowly comes forward, shocked at how easily you let her in. But this isn’t Sally’s first rodeo and you’re not going to trick her that easily.

Throughout the movie you scoot closer to Sally and when your flesh touches hers she starts to feel something other than the empty and lonely feeling of death. There’s not a word she can think of to describe it, but it’s a warm comforting feeling. Almost like a hug. However she credits that to the alcohol so she doesn’t fall for you.

After the movie you tell Sally you’re going to order room service and ask what she would like. The blonde is once again taken aback at your consideration of her, but says she doesn’t want anything, starting to get annoyed at how kind you’re being to her.

So you order something for yourself and as you eat you ask about Sally and her past. However she snaps at you, saying you don’t really care or even if you do you’ll leave her when you learn she’s a monster. That’s when you notice fresh tears streaming down her face.

But you assure her that you’re not asking to be judgmental, just to care. So even though Sally doesn’t divulge everything, she does tell you some small parts of her past, anticipating your repulsion or disgust. However you do the opposite, pulling her into a hug and thanking her for trusting you enough to share.

By now Sally lets is more shocked than upset at your acceptance and you see her smile for the first time. Then you ask if she’ll stay for one more movie and she doesn’t hesitate to agree. This time while the movie plays you lean against her and without speaking she wraps her arms around you.

When tucked in Sally’s embrace you don’t feel her cold, dead aura whatsoever and snuggle into her further. In the process she is encompassed in your warmth and for a moment gets a glimpse at feeling alive once more.

By the time the credits roll you’re fast asleep in Sally’s arms and she remembers her plan to kill you earlier. But she decides against it. Not to make herself some superhero, but because for so long she has been the victim of rejection and you accepted her. You didn’t use her as something for selfish pleasure or take your anger out on her only to leave. Your care was unconditional.

When you wake up the next morning Sally is gone, leaving you confused and almost wondering if you had just dreamed about her. So before you leave, you go to the front desk and ask about Sally and if she’s checked out already. They tell you she’s still here so you leave a note for her before leaving.

It’s only then that Sally comes out from the shadows and looks to see what you wrote to her. And her heart melts when she sees that you thanked her for helping you to feel better and left your number in case she needed someone to talk to.

(https://charliewrites.tumblr.com/post/174967894140/sarah-paulson-in-american-horror-story-roanoke)

Audrey Tindall

Today is your 1 year anniversary of being Audrey’s girlfriend. So the actress specifically takes the day off to spend it with you. And for once she had the forethought to plan a whole day of activities to do together.

However before you can even leave the house, her first plan goes awry when you slip into her shower to “wish her a happy anniversary.” Did she make a breakfast reservation that you will be late for? Yes. But is she gonna turn down shower sex with you? Absolutely not.

But now because of that distraction Audrey is nearly down the driver’s neck trying to get them to go faster so you aren’t late. But they can only go so fast in stopped LA traffic. However you get her attention to show her one of those airplanes making a message in the sky, blissfully unaware of the stress Audrey is experiencing.

In the end you miss your reservation. However you believe she made the reservation for the place next door and ask how she knew it was your favorite spot. So Audrey just rolls with it and says it was instinct and you eat breakfast there. Then Audrey takes you to one of the walking trails up to the Griffith Observatory.

But you accidentally take the “scenic” trail and what should have been a 1 mile trek ends up being almost 3 miles. And that includes walking a half a mile on a side path thinking it’s the right way.

Because Audrey thought it was going to be a small walk she didn’t bring any water or tell you to wear walking shoes so you end up with some gnarly blisters on your heels.

The actress feels horrible about it, but you assure her it’s fine and buy some flip flops and bottles of water from the observatory’s gift shop. Then you take your time to look around the observatory and absolutely love it.

Because the walk took so long, you end up eating lunch at some generic, overpriced but subpar lunch place attached to the observatory. The food isn’t great, but the view is amazing. And honestly you’re both so hungry that you’re willing to eat anything.

After this Audrey takes you to Venice Beach to hang out and shop around. But when you get there, the streets are closed off for a huge block party. And to make matters worse, people around begin to recognize her and come up asking for pictures and autographs.

Audrey feels terrible about everything that’s going wrong and now she has to deal with a swarm of fans. Right away you see her trembling lip and tell people to back off. Then you guide her into a nearby antique shop. Luckily the owner saw everything and locks the door after you enter while saying you’re welcome to stay as long as you need.

You quickly thank him, but guide Audrey who has teary eyes to a section of the store that’s not visible to the windows and ask if she’s ok. While she’s clearly shaken up she nods. But she also tearfully apologizes for ruining the day.

However you silence her with a kiss and soothe she isn’t ruining the day at all. That’s when you both see an older woman you assume to be the owner’s wife and freeze up, concerned about how she will act about your relationship. But she just offers a smile and says she just made some lemonade, offering the privacy of their breakroom.

You follow her back and sit with the older couple while drinking lemonade and end up having a good time just listening to how they got together and they came to own the shop. By the time you say goodbye it’s nearly evening the group of fans is gone, but they let you exit out the backdoor just in case.

While walking down the street you pause at a local restaurant that looks delicious for dinner. Audrey goes to protest saying she made a reservation at some fancy, a-list restaurant. But honestly both of you look pretty rugged with no time to clean up and you are interested in going here. So she agrees to eating where you want since every other plan she’s made has gone to shit.

Because the restaurant is nearly empty of guests, when the server finds out it’s your one year anniversary, they offer a special discount and free dessert. Then they do their best to make the setting as romantic as possible.

In the process you meet the owner and their whole family when each one comes out to congratulate you on your anniversary. The food is delicious and even though Audrey had other plans, this is way better.

When you finish dinner, Audrey sees the sky is overcast to the point that you won’t be able to see the sun actually setting. But you assure her you would love to go to the beach anyways even to just to dip your feet in the water.

So you go to the nearest beach and while you walk along the shore (holding hands of course) you tell her you have loved today. She stops in confusion because everything that could go wrong did and she let you down. But you pull her close to kiss her lips and assure her that you wouldn’t change a thing about today and that you love her so much.

She happily replies that she loves you too. Then it starts to rain. And not like a light sprinkle either. It’s pouring rain that leaves you drenched to the bone within minutes. Audrey looks up and waves her fist at the sky as she curses it for raining this one night when it’s sunny in LA every other day.

But you giggle and end her dramatic monologue with a long kiss before running back to your car. By the time you’re riding home both of you are soaked. But you don’t mind and you promise Audrey that you have made some plans of your own for her when you get back to your bedroom.

Ally Mayfair-Richards

Recently Ally has been super busy working on her re-election campaign as senator. Of course you are her #1 booster and supporter. And you want to do something special for her to help lighten Ally’s load.

So tonight you and Oz decide to make a special dinner for Ally. As usual Ally texts you that she’ll be working late so you have plenty of time to work. Then Oz tells you her favorite meal and you both go out shopping to get the necessary ingredients.

Once you return, Oz pulls out the cookbook with the instructions and sits up on the countertop (Something Ally would NEVER allow) to stay next to you while reading the steps as you cook. But...here's the thing: You have no idea how to cook—at all.

So Oz grimaces as he watches you and tries to help you along with little helpful tips. But he’s a kid—not an experienced cook like Ally.

You struggle through it and know you’re messing things up. But you’re hopeful a couple mistakes here and there won’t be too noticeable. As you finish cooking, Ally texts you she’s headed home so you and Oz run around, setting the table and finishing the dinner. And as you haphazardly pour one of the wines you randomly picked into her glass (Because—let’s be honest you have no idea how to pair wine) the door opens.

As soon as Ally walks into her home, her nose wrinkles at the smell of burnt food and other concerning scents. So she calls out your name before doing anything else, hoping nothing happened, and you reply you’re in the dining room.

When she walks in, her eyes widen at seeing the dangerous-looking meal and Oz’s expression of concern and disgust. But her attention is drawn to you when you tell her you made dinner with a nervous smile.

Seeing all of the effort you put in makes Ally’s heart melt and even though she’s concerned, she goes along with it, thanking you and sitting down. She could struggle through one subpar meal to make you feel good—but then the three of you start to eat.

The first bite Oz takes, he gags and says “Yuck!” That makes Ally shoot him a warning look. However, she nearly chokes when she takes the first bite. So she tries to conceal that by washing it down with a generous sip of wine. But then she actually does choke at the horribly paired food and drink.

At this point you want to die in humiliation and hide your face in your hands. You know Ally is the “bread winner” so that should make you the homemaker. But you have no idea how to “home make.” That has never come natural to you. So you do one thing that you do know how to do and apologize.

Right away, Ally takes your hand and guides you to look at her while soothing that she doesn’t mind cooking. But you explain that you wanted to be helpful and alleviate stress and you just made everything worse for her. She assures you that she finds cooking to be cathartic and just having you and Oz around makes everything better.

So you throw away the disappointment of a meal and all 3 of you head into the kitchen. However most of the necessary dishes are dirty from your cooking so you offer to wash them while Ally takes off her makeup and gets into lounge clothes.

So she heads to your room and you and Oz get to work washing and drying the dishes. As you both finish up, Ally walks in to see him perched on the countertop and drying dishes next to the sink. So she scolds him about sitting there and Oz just throws you under the bus saying that you let him do that all the time.

You try to deny the accusation, but both Ally and Oz know you are horrible at enforcing rules, so you apologize and tell Oz in your “stern” voice no more sitting on the countertop. However, they both know if he sits up there and you’re home alone you’ll ultimately let him do it.

That’s the moment when you take in Ally. Not senator Mayfair-Richards, just your love, Ally with her oversized sweater and cute, little ponytail at the nape of her neck with a couple loose hairs that are too short to stay held back frame her face.

You let her take the lead and watch her come alive as she does the cooking and delegates you to do different side tasks that don’t risk something being over or under cooked. Meanwhile Oz sits at the mini bar and tells his mom about his day. These ordinary moments between the three of you are not very common, but they’re your favorite moments.

In less than an hour, the 3 of you are back in the dining room with an excellent, homemade dinner. You all happily eat the late night meal before going over to the living room and watching a TV show Oz chooses.

He lays across your laps to watch it so he can lean on you while Ally gently strokes his hair and by the end he’s asleep. Then you gather him in your arms before picking him up and carrying him to his bed while Ally follows behind and whispers her shock that you can still actually hold him. Somehow he never wakes up so you gently lay him down and Ally tucks his blankets around him, placing a kiss on his forehead before walking out.

Then you both go down to the kitchen and Ally drinks a couple glasses of wine at the mini bar while you clean up from dinner. Of course she wants to help you, but you insist on her sitting while you take care of everything. And as you go, you ask how her day was.

Ally tells you about her long day and asks your opinion on a couple of the decisions she is considering. While you have little to no experience in politics, she’s thankful that you listen to her and if Ally asks, she knows you’ll always choose what’s best for her unlike other “helpful” politicians.

When you finish up, Ally walks over to you and admits that telling you what to do earlier as you both cooked felt good and asks if you would consider being told what to do in the bedroom by her so she could “relieve the remaining stress from the day.” Of course you are more than happy to oblige in submitting to Ally and let her guide you up to your bedroom.

(https://lauramaher25.tumblr.com/post/179727949356/ahs-ms-wilihemina-venable)

Wilhelmina Venable

You know Wilhemina truly loves you when she begrudgingly agrees to go to Disneyland for your birthday. Of course you butter up the deal by purchasing VIP passes so you don’t have to deal with lines—but still.

The night before you can’t hardly sleep because you’re so excited to go to the happiest place on earth for the first time. But Wilhemina makes you stay in bed even though you want to start getting ready for the day at 4 in the morning.

While you couldn’t convince Mina to “officially” disneybound with you, she does wear a casual plum-colored dress, black cardigan, and shorter heels than usual in the same dark purple as her dress. Even her ponytail for today is less formal then her work coiffure.

On the other hand, you’ve pulled all the stops to disneybound as Snow White. Your outfit has been planned for weeks down to the smallest detail and having your girlfriend looking like the evil queen will make amazing pics.

When you get to the park, you nearly bounce around like a kid with excitement. Wilhelmina watches you with narrowed eyes making her look even more like a Disney villain, but lets you have your moment, only complaining when you go to take a selfie with her. And even then, she manages to give a small smile in the photo.

After you pick up your VIP passes you go to get your pins for your first visit and your birthday. You also get a first visit pin for Mina, but that’s when you find out this isn’t her first time to Disneyland. Then you slowly make your way down main street, stopping to look at every shop. In the process you have the redhead help you choose between two sets of ears and choose a pair for her to wear.

If looks could kill, you would be on death’s doorstep from her glare. At first she says no and remains firm in her answer. However you pull the ole “it’s your birthday and your first time at Disneyland” card so she spitefully wears them, grateful that they’re at least purple. But when you go to buy more merchandise, Wilhelmina drags encourages you out to actually get to the rides.

After taking WAY too many pictures around main street and in front of the castle, you begin to make your way through the park. Your first attraction is the tiki room. Then you share your first dole whip before going on the Jungle Cruise.

That ride just about kills Wilhemina and with each corny joke she lets out a soft groan, pained at how dumb these jokes really are. But she tries to not ruin the moment for you. Meanwhile you crack up at every joke.

Next you ride Pirates of the Caribbean and love it, constantly looking around to take everything in and pointing out Jack Sparrow each time as if Mina doesn’t notice the very obvious lighting and animatronic of him. On the other hand, the red head totally forgets there’s a drop and she lets out an adorable little squeak in surprise that only you hear. Because you like it so much you ride it again and ride Haunted Mansion twice too.

In between the attractions you practically skip along and with any character you pass—literally any character—you will wave at them and would stop to take photos, but Wilhemina drags you along keeps you moving.

As you walk through the park, you notice a couple kids gasp when they see Mina or point at her. Of course the redhead is offended and cold towards them, but then you realize they’re calling her princess Ariel. And at one point while you’re sitting to eat some churros a little girl shyly comes up to you both and says to Wilhemina that she’s her favorite princess before asking how Flounder and Sebastian are doing.

Mina is flabbergasted and for a moment just looks at the girl with wide eyes, bewildered that she would ever think of Wilhemina as a princess. However she pulls herself together enough to say that they're doing well. Then the girl says goodbye and runs back over to her family.

And while Mina has never been a kid person, being called a “princess” by different kids does make her smile a little bit. No one else would notice, but you do.

When you pass by Splash Mountain Wilhemina says no when you ask to ride. So even though you plead to go on it, you keep walking. The only other attraction she says no to is It’s a Small World. Even passing by the facade and hearing the faded music makes her shudder and declare she would rather puncture her own ear drums than go through that.

When it comes to the parade, even though Mina hates crowds, she sits with you and watches you call out to characters like the other kids around. Of course she gives you her trademark look of silently asking if you are really acting like this. However the redhead does secretly find it a little adorable.

Tomorrowland is your last “land” and that’s when you find out Mina kicks ass at Buzz Lightyear’s Astro Blasters. The first time you rode she blew you out of the water and ranked as a 1st class Ranger with a whopping score of 749,000 points and the next time she scored even higher.

For dinner you reserved a special table where you can watch the fireworks while eating. However during the whole show you forget to even touch your food, gasping at everything that happens and trying to take it all in. And because you look so damn adorable, before “rational Mina” can make an executive decision, “impulsive Mina” tells you she’ll ride Splash Mountain if you still want to.

You have never eaten a meal so fast in your life and when you finish you practically run to the ride, thanking Mina the whole walk there. Here’s the thing though—she thought it was an up and down one drop deal, like any other log ride. To the point that she took on the noble task of sitting in front of you so you wouldn’t get you special handmade Snow White dress damaged by water. Oh no, there are 3 drops. 3. So by the time you get off poor Wilhemina looks like a drowned cat. But the picture of your faces on the final drop is just too good to not buy it.

And on the way back, even though she’s soaked with cold water, you keep close to Mina on the monorail packed with people headed back to your car. And it feels so good to have her close to you whispering to ask if you had a good birthday. You know this is something she would never, ever choose to do. But her consideration touches your heart and you answer yes before thanking her once again for doing all of this.

Tagged: @marilynroselleprentiss, @saviorinsilk, @chokemepaulson, @versonstar, @find-me-a-constellation, @cordwliagoode, @psychobitchtess, @midnight-lestrange, @mysweetdelia, @venablesbitch, @peachesandlesbians, @nerdaroo, @cordeliafoxxe, @leskaksel, @lovelymspaulson, @grilledcheeseandguavajelly, @whatabluddymess, @natasha-danvers, @saucy-sapphic, @marvelfansince08love, @wilheminawinters

Let me know if you would like to be tagged in later works!

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honey-dewey · 4 years

Text

Scarborough Fair

Pairing: Max Phillips/Centaur Reader

Word Count: 2,463

Warnings: Reader was stabbed in the leg, but there’s no long description of injury. One use of (F/N)

When Max went hunting, the last thing he expected to find was an injured centaur. And yet, it happened. Of course, Max, with his heart of gold, decided to rescue and rehabilitate the centaur. I’m sure he can’t fuck that up, right?

The night was young, a perfect full moon suspended behind light cloud cover and a nice breeze cooling the overly warm summer day. Max wandered aimlessly, hands in his pockets as he strolled through a hiking path, searching halfheartedly for a meal. At this point, he’d take what he could get, his stomach growling slightly as he thought about the cotton-y feeling in his mouth. He needed to eat.

A rustling in the distance alerted him, causing him to look up. Faint speaking, maybe two voices, piqued his interest. He tuned his ears in that direction, trying to pick up distinct words.

Before he could, the smell hit him. The powerful tang of horse blood sent his senses haywire, and he honed in on the smell, slowly heading down the path towards the meal, his intent to hear the voices completely forgotten

As he drew closer, the talking got more distinct, until he slowed, almost stopping completely to listen to the voice singing. It snapped him out of his crazed hunting, the bloodlust fading as he listened.

“Are you going to Scarborough Fair? Parsley, sage, rosemary, and thyme.”

Max stopped, frozen between two trees on the border of a clearing, lush with ferns and other greenery. Settled next to a log, emitting the smell of blood, was a centaur, singing the enchanting song.

“Remember me to one who lives there, she once was a true love of mine.”

Still frozen, Max watched the centaur whip around to face a squirrel who had rustled the undergrowth, the singing fading with a fearful squeak. He tried to slip away, noiseless, but the centaur caught him, wide eyes turning to trap him where he was.

Max cleared his throat, trying to take the edge off the nerves building in his stomach. “Are you okay?”

The centaur flinched away, a yelp of pain escaping them. Max took a step forward, causing the centaur to move back, dragging a clearly injured leg.

“I just want to help,” Max promised, holding his hands out, near his shoulders so they knew he was unarmed. “Your leg, what happened?”

The centaur eyed him nervously before slowly extending their injured leg. Max smiled, kneeling down and slowly tracing across the wound, a stab mark. It was deep, but hadn’t been made with anything horribly large. Maybe a pocket knife? Whatever it was, Max could smell the metal, so it hadn’t been wood. He looked around, trying to find something to stop the active bleeding.

“Do you have any fabric?” He asked, looking at the centaur.

They nodded, digging around in a small leather bag on their hip and handing him a roll of linen. Max took the roll, slowly wrapping it tightly across the wound.

“Done!” He said, sitting back and smiling. “Are you gonna be okay?”

The centaur nodded, using a nearby tree to wobble to their hooves, immediately falling back down when they put pressure on their injured leg.

“Okay maybe not,” Max mumbled. “C’mon, you can crash with me for a bit. Better than staying out here.”

“No!”

Max stopped. “Darling, if you stay here, I guarantee the next vampire to come around is going to use you as an easy meal. We don’t want that, do we?”

The centaur bristled, shoulders rising in defense. “And what makes you think you can protect me?”

Max smiled, leaning down and bearing his fangs. “Trust me. No one’s gonna fuck with me.”

———

The walk to the vampire’s apartment was slow. You couldn’t go fast, and you absolutely refused to touch him, snarling whenever he got too close. He definitely wasn’t scared of you, but he did snap away whenever you growled.

Eventually, he broke the silence. “So. Got a name?”

You snorted, feeling the horrible stab of pain when you put your back left leg down. “Yeah. You?”

“Max Phillips.”

You were quiet for a minute. “I’m (F/N).”

Max smiled. “Nice to meet you.”

And the two of you sunk into silence once more.

By the time the sun had risen, you were in Max’s townhouse.

“Sorry,” he said, showing you the small bedroom on the ground floor. “It’s all I have that isn’t up a set of stairs.”

You shook your head, falling into the mattress shoved against the wall and sighing deeply. “It’s fine.”

Max nodded. “I’ll be back.”

He left you alone, which was a mercy. You immediately took off your shawl, using it as a blanket, the knitted green yarn warming you to your core.

After that, you were determined to finish healing yourself. You’d been under too much stress in the forest, the conditions poor for attempting to heal yourself.

Unwrapping the stab wound in your leg, you piled the linen under the leg so as not to stain Max’s mattress. The blood had stopped flowing, but still oozed faster than you would’ve liked.

“Tell her to reap it with a sickle of leather, blazing in scarlet battalions. Parsley, sage, rosemary, and thyme.”

Your leg started to itch, the golden magic flowing off your hands and surrounding your wound, knitting you back together. It was slower than you’d like, but was truly better than nothing at this point.

“Generals order their soldiers to kill. And gather it all in a bunch of heather, a cause they've long ago forgotten. Then she'll be a true love of mine.”

You began to waver, forcing the magic out as exhaustion caught up to you. You stopped, staring at the still oozing injury. It didn’t hurt as much, so you’d definitely healed the worst of it, but it likely wasn’t enough to get you up and walking as well as you needed to.

“You done?”

Jumping, you turned to face Max, who was holding a white box and a mass of folded fabric.

“I said I’d be back,” Max pointed out, kneeling beside the mattress and opening the box. Inside was a cluster of human medical equipment, and Max grabbed gauze, a roll of fabric bandages, gloves, and a small canister of something. “You did good here. But I still want to treat it the old fashioned way.”

You watched him put the gloves on, wary as he grabbed the canister. He’d taken his suit jacket off, leaving him in a rumpled button up and slacks.

“This’ll sting,” he warned, positioning the canister. Before you could ask what he was doing, a cold fire spread up your leg, and you swore loudly, smacking Max in the process.

“Ow!” He yelled, falling backwards from the force of your smack. “What was that for?”

You tucked your leg up to your belly, protecting it from any more of Max’s assaults. “That hurt!”

“Yeah!” Max sat back up, cradling his face. “I warned you it would!”

Still keeping your leg protected, you eyed Max. “What’s in the canister?”

Max held it out. “It’s a disinfectant. I just wanted to take the precaution. Magic is good and all, but it’s no match for infection.”

You hesitantly gave him your leg again, bracing for the sting. It came and went, Max working diligently as he pressed gauze into your injury and began to methodically wrap a fabric bandage around your leg. When he was done, you tucked your leg back up under you, huffing softly. “How long will it take to heal?”

“With how much magic you’ve got and how good I am at playing doctor?” Max asked, packing the medical kit back up and pulling his gloves off. “I’d say a week.”

“A week?” You asked, looking around the bedroom. “I can’t be here for a week!”

Max snorted. “Suck it up. And put those on, it gets cold down here.”

He left, and you huffed at his retreating back. Lifting the pile of folded clothes, you sniffed them hesitantly. An old hoodie and a soft blanket. You draped the blanket over your lower half, sniffing the hoodie and eventually giving in.

The hoodie was big on you, providing warmth that the blanket and your shawl didn’t. Settling down into the mattress, you let the adrenaline of the night wear off and carry you into a fitful sleep for most of the day.

The next few days with Max were tolerable. He wasn’t as terrible as you assumed, always providing you with appropriate food and drink. He was knowledgeable about your injury, changing the gauze every evening and thankfully not using the spray disinfectant again. Instead, he used warm water and soap, sometimes adding a disinfectant cream that didn’t sting.

By the time your leg had begun to finally scab and your magic was back in full, it had been four days. Max insisted on keeping you until the week was up, which made you mad until you realized he was waiting to see if your leg was hurt beyond the obvious stab.

On day five, you complained about feeling dirty.

“I promise I’ve washed the blankets,” Max said, settling down on the edge of the mattress with a black water bottle. He never ate, but insisted on sitting with you while you did. Stabbing a bite of your own food, you rolled your eyes.

“I haven’t cleaned myself in a week,” you pointed out. “Do you have a hose?”

Max shook his head. “I’ve got something better.”

Something better turned out to be a shower. An actual shower that fit all of you and Max. He smiled, turning the hot water on and watching your face as you realized what was happening.

The hot water dissolved every problem you’d been having, from the muscle aches to the greasy feeling. You shifted on your hooves, enjoying the water. You flicked your tail, sending a spray of water everywhere and splashing Max right in the face.

“Oh it is on!” He shouted, happily reaching around you for the shower head.

You laughed, grabbing the shower head before he could and turning it on him, thoroughly soaking Max.

He wiped his eyes, shoving hair out of his face and grinning. “Give me that.”

The pair of you wrestled for the shower head, you winning on sheer size alone. Holding it triumphantly above your head, you declared yourself the victor before handing Max the shower head.

He nodded. “Thank you,” he said, taking the shower head and beginning to slowly soak your body.

From there, you two managed to tag team wash you down, you taking the top half and him taking the bottom. He was careful around your injury, but the bleeding had stopped days ago, and all he did was take care in not dislodging your scab. Soap pooled around his bare feet, slowly soaking into the hem of his sweatpants. You did your best to scrub around the chest wrappings you wore, and you knew you’d have to set them out to dry at some point.

Max stepped out of the shower once you were sufficiently washed, allowing you to shake the worst of the water off and step out onto a towel on the floor. Max gave you a towel and him a towel, and just like with the soap, you teamed up to get you as dry as possible.

After that, it was dinner time. You settled in the actual kitchen, kneeling at the table while Max drank from his black water bottle. “When can I go home?”

Max sighed. “You’ve made excellent progress. But,”

“I don’t have any infection!” You insisted strongly. “I don’t feel weak or sick or anything! So what is it?”

Max swirled his water bottle around, resting his cheek on his hand. “I dunno. I like having you around.”

That caused you to stop, a strange guilt making your food taste sour. “What?”

“I get lonely,” Max mumbled, not looking at you. “Really lonely. Having you around, it made me feel good.”

You shuffled. “Max. I wouldn’t leave forever. I just miss my family.”

Max perked up. “Really?”

“Yeah!” You smiled, reaching across the table to take his cold hands. “I’ll take you home with me tomorrow and give you my phone number. Then you can visit whenever you get lonely.”

“It’s a deal.”

The next morning, you prepared to go home, wrapping your shawl across your shoulders and repacking your small bag. Max tossed on a jacket, pulling the hood up to protect him from the sun.

“Think you’ll be good to carry me?” He asked, nervously standing beside you.

You nodded, patting the blanket you’d tossed over your back. “Hop on.”

He did, slowly adjusting to sitting on your back.

“Ready?” You asked, looking over your shoulder.

Max gripped the hoodie you were still wearing. “Ready.”

You took off, the wind in your hair an exhilarating feeling as you raced towards home.

Meanwhile, on your back, Max was not having as much fun as you. His hold on the hoodie only got stronger as you galloped, and when you finally slowed to a steady trot, his face was flushed red, which you didn’t even know was possible

“We’re home,” you said eagerly, looking around.

The ranch was far away from prying eyes, with ample land and plenty of accommodations for you and your family. A few of your family members were out in the front yard, and when they saw you, they immediately came running.

“Where were you?” Your mother worried, grabbing your face and examining it. “What happened?” She stopped, seeing Max on your back. “Who’s he.”

You ignored the venom in her voice and helped Max off your back. “This is Max. He saved me when a member of the Timberwolves stabbed me in the leg.”

Your mom’s eyes narrowed. “He’s a vampire.”

“He is,” you agreed. “But he saved my life.”

Max shuffled awkwardly on his feet. You stepped back, so you were standing next to him. “You should probably get going Max.”

“Right,” he said sadly. “I’ve got work tomorrow.”

You smiled, taking a pen from your pouch and scribbling your phone number on his hand. “Call me, okay?”

Max grinned, examining the number. “Sure thing.”

As promised, that night, your phone rang, you scooping it up and eagerly accepting the call. “Hello?”

“Hey.” Max’s smooth voice filled the other end of the phone, causing you to smile. “How’re you?”

“Fine,” you said, settling on your bed. “Missing my favorite bloodsucker.”

Max chuckled. “And I’m missing my favorite pony. How about a riding date, just you and me, hm?”

You smiled. “Sounds lovely. I’m sure you’re an excellent rider Mr. Phillips.”

“I’m not so sure,” Max said with a certain silkiness to his voice. “Maybe you could give me some pointers.”

“Mhm,” you hummed, rolling over to stare at the moon and grin like a lovesick fool. “That sounds wonderful. I’ll see you this weekend, I’m sure of it.”

#Bloodsucking bastards #max phillips #max phillips x reader #max phillips x you #Pedro Pascal #My writing

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incorrect-ikevamp-quotes · 4 years

Note

YO SEBAS’ ROUTE HAS BEEN ANNOUNCED FOR JP I CANT WAIT!!! Do you have any theories of what could happen in his route?!?

Haha, yes, I saw this morning! For those who haven’t yet seen the announcement, it has been said that Sebastian’s route will be coming to the JPN version of Ikevamp on August 25th! It’s very exciting news, and I can’t wait to get started translating after I finish Dazai’s.

Honestly I’m finding this so many degrees of hilarious because I was like “oh ya I’m curious” at first, but after seeing that character introduction video with the lil forehead kiss and the horny as all HELL biting, I’m SLAMMING the horny button holy shit??? (I have that card CG in the JPN ver of the game on my phone and. lord jesus. That scowl. WILL HE STEP ON ME ONEGAI AKIHIKO)

Putting the rest under a cut bc is long and has some JPN ver spoilers:

That being said, let’s address the second part of the ask, shall we? Theories! If I’m honest I’m not surprised Sebastian was next on the docket, but I do admit I’m thoroughly surprised by the CG of him biting MC in earnest--he visibly draws blood on her neck and shoulder. This raises so many questions that are likely to be reiterated endlessly until his rt comes out in full, the most pressing of which is: does Sebastian turn into a vampire? Or is he just really into sadistic foreplay?

If I’m honest I sincerely don’t know if he’s fully turned, only because I’m trying to sort out the information we do have. Why turn into a vampire if the goal is to be with MC, who is also human? If we follow this course of thought, it doesn’t seem to make much sense, does it?

But then our boi Sebas is different in terms of his internalized conflict when compared to the vampires. Granted I may turn out to be wrong about this, but I think the two focal points of his route will be as follows: insecurity and the pursuit of knowledge. Remember that the reason Sebastian (our dearest Akihiko Sato) agrees to Comte’s proposal at all is his insatiable curiosity. I mean just think about it. If Comte told all that stuff about the mansion to someone in modern times, they would probably just figure he was a crazy person and go on with their day. But Sebas, the absolute madlad, agreed; he wanted to see if it was true, and to learn everything he could about people who exhibit extraordinary talent.

I foresee that this, however, may become a double-edged sword. Curiosity killed the cat, as they say. What I mean to say is that it could be very possible he might turn or undergo something similar to the changing process in order to experience what it’s like firsthand (whether to prove he can handle it or because he wants to understand the residents better/gather info). Furthermore, while Sebastian is curious--with no malicious intent at all--this doesn’t mean that envy is impossible in this kind of scenario, either. Admiration and envy are like two sides of a coin; depending on how one interprets information, they can skew to self-consciousness or inspiration. Given the content I’ve seen for Sebastian so far (and man has it been limited as all heck) I often get the implication that he truly does feel inadequate in some ways compared to the other men. As soon as MC chooses him a kind of overwhelming awareness of his normalcy begins; the implication that he is the wrong or lesser choice. Knowing this, I truly wouldn’t be surprised if problems arise as a result of this self-effacing.

(Note: I don’t think that about Sebastian at all, personally! I think he’s very mindful of others and really astute--to say nothing of his skill when it comes to the domestic sphere. I don’t think just anybody could do what he does, and he sells himself far too short. I always think of how the men call him the Ninja Butler and praise how capable he is, how they freely admit the place wouldn’t be the same without him. Sometimes I wish Sebas could see that, though I understand his concerns as well ;-; I’m always torn bc I’ll be like “I understand but alSO N O”)

Besides those latent insecurities, time to expand more on the pursuit of knowledge. In one way this drive might feed his self-derision; he might believe that the more he is able to do and understand and study, the more he can be of use/help other people. (Put simply his value as a person = the increasing extent of his knowledge in an almost linear relationship; without it he is nothing). On the other hand, I think he just genuinely enjoys collecting information the way he does! He likes assessing all the different ways people behave and why, and how this contributes to how they think and who they are. More insight offers him more ways to preoccupy his endlessly moving mind, but it also offers proximity with the subject in question. This to me is absolutely key--I think so much of his studying the great men is linked to his admiration, his wish to be like them and/or his wish to be close to them.

I’d like to address a quick reference to the drinking event that recently released in the ENG version of the app, if only to expand on/clarify where this is coming from. It essentially featured Sebastian and Napoleon sharing a drink together at a bar and in it, Sebastian speaks to the way that he encountered Napoleon in his life, and the reason why he grew so fond of him. He speaks to a childhood entirely detached from the people of his own time, roving through the shelves of libraries, reading endlessly to fill that void. It was a quote by Napoleon that caught his eye and inspired him, and ostensibly the words of people long past that gave him the strength to keep moving forward. This information, coupled with his strange excitement in Isaac’s rt introduction about how Isaac used to throw hands with people who mocked him seems to bring to the forefront a few things for me.

Sebastian is highly, highly individualistic: he doesn’t seem to care much about what is conventional or normal, only in what brings him joy and makes others comfortable/happy. His life is highly internal, but I sense no anti-sociality in this removal from societal expectations. He just lives his own way and tries not to trouble anyone. (This is also highly notable in his acute impatience with Dazai’s shenanigans/ineptitudes now and again; while he doesn’t always scold or explode, he shows a sharp and surprising impatience with willful/harmful/irresponsible behavior.) He’s tactful and measured, but highly excitable under the right circumstances. He also doesn’t seem to think much of his own life re: self-derision. Think Leonardo’s rt ending: he insists that the serial killer focus on him and not on MC, he tells her he has no qualms with dying if it means she’ll make it out alive. MC has to be the one to tell him to think more of his own life. As such I wouldn’t put it past him to have enough nerdy reckless energy to test the waters of being a vampire (all the better if it helps him understand the great men).

Comte once said it in an event story a few months ago, but I think he really hit the nail on the head in some respects. He says something to the effect of “His curiosity is admirable, but please Sebastian--some things are to remain private.” Sebastian doesn’t intend to be intrusive or malicious, he just likes knowing things for the sake of knowing. It’s about the cones answering his nerdy desire to piece things together, not stepping on people’s toes. (It’s nice too because Comte seems to understand this and doesn’t see it as a shortcoming/nuisance, he just tries to nudge Sebas in a different direction if he starts prying too close to people’s personal business ;-; pls pardon the Comte love I just can’t help myself)

Enter Johann Georg Faust.

Now then we know very little about the reserved priest doctor, but there are tidbits of information that we can work with (or at the very least, stand out to me a lot). The one I would like to focus on for this explanation is the little blurb that appears when you open the Ikevamp app and it’s loading, providing something like trivia facts for each character. In the ENG app we got those early, but we don’t have the ones for our antagonists. Iirc, Faust’s reads something to the effect of “will often sneak substances into their (as in the castle residents Vlad and Charles’) food to test the effect of his concoctions on vampires.” There have been hints that Faust is to be our mad scientist of sorts; that he is experimenting under Vlad’s orders to find a reliable way to transform a human being into an immortal equivalent to that of a pureblood. But I have mentioned on more than one occasion that I really don’t think Faust is only doing all of this for Vlad. He has his own curiosity that is seeking to be alleviated, perhaps he is satisfied with having another puzzle dumped in his lap--a means to distract himself and exhaust his faculties.

(One has to wonder if Vlad turned them under the same principle of desperation, and if that were the case, what Faust and Charles might desire more than anything else...Is Faust operating on a kind of necessity to atone? Has he simply given up hope that scientific advancement can happen without someone getting hurt, and so he does his best to balance the good and bad wrought by his explorations? Is he trying to bring someone back himself, is he trying to stall Vlad’s efforts in his own way? I really can’t be sure; there are just too many unanswered questions when it comes to Faust...)

This is where Sebastian and Faust begin to overlap. The pursuit of knowledge, an insatiable curiosity, a capacity to overreach the bounds of appropriate civility/decorum to get the information they want. It could potentially serve as a temptation for Sebas; become a vampire by Vlad’s hand and you can watch history over the span of generations. Assist in the development of an immortal, and you won’t even need someone like Comte to walk you through the different eras of time--you could explore yourself. While Sebas seems to be motivated more by service to other people, there can be no doubt that this could cause a great deal of friction. He will have to work to remind himself why he’s doing what he does and what it means to him, and whether or not becoming a vampire is truly what he wants.

But, there is also the issue of Vlad’s telepathic manipulations. Is it possible that an encounter with Faust (and by extension, proximity to Vlad/meeting Vlad head-on) could result in Sebastian being turned/experimented on without his knowledge? I.e. Vlad using his compulsion and sending him home with a word or memory of what happened. Though that’s certainly not the only possible explanation available. The other thing I was thinking about was a mechanic that was introduced in event stories prior to Sebas’ MS announcement. In the event story, MC and her suitor of choice encounter a street merchant that boasts a serum that can turn people into vampires. They, of course, don’t believe him--but the vial is procured and MC either purposefully or accidentally is exposed to it (i.e she knocks it over and it shatters in Leo’s ES). For a brief time, she exhibits vampiric qualities; she feels the thirst for blood as acutely as any of the other vampires in the mansion. I.e. In Napoleon’s ES, Sebas notices something wrong with MC when they’re just pouring vials of Rouge--the usual prepwork--and she runs out of the room looking dazed. Her odd/new instincts are only alleviated when she bites and drinks Napoleon’s blood, but after that single episode she shows no further signs of vampiric qualities. It’s a temporary but acute transformation. While I have no specifics as to how this is possible, I have to wonder if something similar might be done to Sebastian; whether as a means to test him (does he really want this? find out after the commercial break) or a kind of trick/trap laid by the antagonists. I remain unsure, but these are the two most likely explanations that come to mind if he hasn’t been fully turned.

As to whether or not his vampirism will be permanent, I’ve genuinely been oscillating on that one. I think it’s certainly possible given his intrigue (I never see much fear in him) with vampirism and his probable enjoyment with the prospect of an endless life learning about things (I can literally hear Leonardo screaming internally and I’m ngl it’s sad and funny). But there’s also something about the bite CG that speaks to strain/alarm, to surprise--that he wasn’t at all aware of the changes within himself--and I have to wonder if it might put him off of the prospect (like that he lost control/hurt MC)...Essentially I think it will just really boil down to how the symptoms come about (temporary or permanent), and how much his affections for MC might deter that curiosity/possible wish (if temporary, he might not touch the prospect again--if permanent, THAT WOULD BE SO FUCKING SEXY BECAUSE I’d wager the rest of the route might be MC trying to help him adjust/recover IN A SEXY WAY).

(Note post-translation: I fucking HATE IT HERE. The bite CG text says smth to the effect of “The bloodlust is unbearable--stay away from me; I don’t think I’ll be able to keep from attacking you.”) In light of this information, I am this 👌 close to launching myself straight into the sun. OFC his route is gonna be sweet as all shit and then it’s just gonna go downhill from there with angst. WHYYYYYYYYYY AKIHIKO (at least his voice is mega sexy and heals my wounds OTL) It also says something about “a fate that is greatly moved” so that does suggest a more permanent change than the temporary alternatives I mentioned (though we all know how Cybird loves to jerk us around so I’m leaving that up for debate)...this shit better be hurt/comfort or i s2g im throwing hands

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA THE ANTICIPATION IS KILLING ME!!!!!!!

Here’s hoping he’ll make for a delightful surprise! I’m looking forward to it c:

#asks #ikevamp #ikemen vampire #ikevamp sebastian #ikevamp akihiko sato #ikevamp meta #bruh i woke up to so much yelling and im still reeling from the developments #hello????? sebas lookin tender AND sexy and im ngl i am v much here for it my ass pass is SHAKING #i genuinely didn't think i'd be this curious/intrigued but now that i saw the introduction vid im just #👉👈 i am looking RESPECTFULLY #man im quaking i guess its time to translate all the sebas stories i have and think about my hubris #like i thought sebas would be the whole 'you get a human suitor if you dont want the vampire stuff as much'#and so i was like #'i do not see my ass loves vampires too much for this'#but then he went vamp in the preview and im just YEAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! **RIPS SHIRT OPEN**#bruh this changes literally everything #come here you giant nerd and let me punch a whole straight through that v card #history aint got nothin on this dynamite [REDACTED]#rambles #anywho if you need me ill be replaying the vid over and over again #ty cybird for sparing some serotonin in these trying times LMAO

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chickensarentcheap · 3 years

Text

I Found- Chapter 1

A/N: Hey folks! This is little visit to the past in honour of the one year anniversary of Extraction and this fic itself. As of tomorrow, I will post two to three chapters A DAY until all are up. I know they’re a mess on my blog right now and people who don’t want to go to Ao3 can’t find all the chapters. I was going to thoroughly edit, but I thought ‘why not leave it as is?’. It’s a little more than 365 days old now and a lot has changed for both the characters and my writing itself. As my long time readers and supporters can tell you :). So keep in mind, this was my first foray into writing Tyler and it’s rough and it’s a little...not the me I am now...but it’s a fun ride, IMO.

Fandom: Extraction

Pairing: Tyler Rake and Esme Rake (Original Female Character)

Face Claims: Chris Hemsworth (obviously) and Rachel Bilson

Premise: Broken and bleeding. Weathered and in tatters. Two damaged and weary souls find one another when they least expect it. Wrong place, wrong time. Yet both powerless to stop it.

Summary: Eleven months after the events in Dhaka and his near death experience, Tyler Rake is a new man. A different man. Struggling with the demons of his past while balancing being a husband and a father.

AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23945782/chapters/57587218

It's been just shy of twelve months and his instincts are still keen; nerves rash and fresh, body and mind always on high alert. The proof to the old adage that old habits really do die hard.

A journey to the very brink of death. Weeks of lying in a hospital bed teetering on the threshold of this life and the next. Countless agonizing hours of rehab and physical therapy just to relearn the basics and get back onto his weary and battered feet. Once he was home nothing had been able to slow him down. He threw everything he had into healing. Every ounce of mind, body, and spirit. Pushing himself past the warnings and the limits that the doctors and specialists had set for him. Ignoring the advice on not to push himself too hard, too fast. He felt as if he didn't have a choice. He no longer just had himself to worry about; another human being with one on the way that was relying on him. Depending on him to take care of them. Provide for them. Protect them. So he had pushed himself to the brink of both exhaustion and physical and emotional collapse. Eventually finding himself back at at the gym and packing on the weight and muscle. Anxious for some semblance of the man he used to be.

He hears the soft rustle of blankets though the monitor on the nightstand and his eyes immediately snap open. Sleep was a strange beast for him these days. Nights where he could fall into a peaceful slumber and stay there until sunlight was streaming through the window, others where the pain was all encompassing and nauseating and he couldn't get comfortable, and those where he was haunted by the demons of his past. The latter didn't come nearly as often as they did before; managing to find some hint of internal peace with the things he had done and witnessed. Once in a while he'd find himself back on that bridge; assaulted by the smells of gun powder and lead. The acrid taste of blood on his lips. And he'd hear her voice and feel her hands; the way she cradled his face in them, the way she'd pulled his nearly lifeless body tight against her, felt those tears that fell on his skin. Thankfully he'd awaken and quickly discover that he was in the safety and comfort of his own home. His own bed. And he'd watch her as she slept; the way the moonlight painted her smooth skin in an ethereal glow and the slight smile that tugged at the corners of her mouth. He'd watch her and listen to her breathe and he'd remind himself of just how far he had come. Gratitude spreading through him like a slow burning fire. Thankful for the second chance that he'd been given. For the love that he'd found during one of the darkest and most difficult periods of his life. She'd given him a reason. A purpose. And he wasn't going to take that for granted.

He groans as he rolls over onto his back. The pain isn't as bad tonight. There were times he could barely even move. Where the agony made him dizzy and nauseous and even the simplest of tasks seemed impossible to preform. Tonight it's a dull ache; a nagging pain that has settled deep into his bones and his joints but he has learned to deal with. Placing his hands behind his head, he waits and listens. The lights from the monitor dancing across the ceiling as life stirs in the room across the hall. He's gotten used to it; the little noises, the soft sighs, the slight fussing before she settles herself back to sleep. It wasn't his first rodeo after all; not his first foray into fatherhood. But it is the first time he's been able to be more hands on. Put his be all and end all into the nurturing. And this time he knows he will get it right. He's determined to make amends for the mistakes of his past. Moving on didn't mean forgetting. It didn't mean that the love and regret and the guilt weren't still there, lingering just under the surface. Sometimes the greatest homage to the dead was how the living continued. How they made up for the bad decisions they made and how those decisions had...in the end...helped shape them into a better person.

The sounds through the monitor continue and he sits up, swinging his legs over the side of the bed and giving his body and brain time to adjust to full consciousness. Running his hands through his hair and over his tired face, fingers brushing against the various scars that serve as a lasting memory of his former life. A pair of sweats sit in a discarded pile by the bed and he reaches for them; softly muttering profanities at the various cracks and pops that his body makes at the simple task of pulling on his pants. Scar tissue, arthritis, remnants of shrapnel and bullets that couldn't safely be removed. All working together to be a complete pain in his ass. His wife moves behind him. Sighing loudly and contently as she rolls over onto her side. Not waking as her hand instinctively reaching out for him; finger tips brushing against his back just as he stands up.

He is out the door and in the hall before the first shrill cry erupts. Yawning and stretching noisily as he steps into the nursery. A cheerful room with soft yellow walls, pink, white, and purple stripped curtains and natural wood furniture. Teddy bears and dolls staring down at him from the perches on the shelves on the wall, accompanied by framed photos of baby animals and Disney characters. He'd never pictured himself a 'girl dad'; frilly dresses and the tiny socks with the lace around the ankles, and the little headbands that served no other purpose than being cute. He was rough and tumble. Always had been, even from an early age. So when he'd found out he was having a daughter he'd been terrified. He didn't know the first thing about taking care of little girls and doing their hair and healing their broken hearts. And for the first time in his life was actually scared of something. Or someone. A being that hadn't even been born yet but was already making a huge impact on his life.

“You'll be fine,” his wife had assured him when he'd expressed his concern. Watching from the couch as she stood at the kitchen table folding laundry. Including a newly purchased outfit and those tiny teeny socks that she had purchased just hours ago. She was so beautiful. Standing there with that chestnut hair tumbling down to her waist, her belly swollen with their child. HIS child. A child that had been conceived in the midst of all the chaos and uncertainty. “You've ridden this particular bike before,” she'd reminded him. “This isn't your first time going through this.”

“That was different. That was a boy. This is a girl. This is dresses and pig tails and tea parties and make up and other boys.”

“Tyler, that's years down the road. You can't worry about that stuff. Make up and boys? You can't dwell on what she's going to be like when she's a teenager.”

“I sure bloody well can. Because knowing my luck she'll end up just like her mother. Full of piss and vinegar and all kinds of trouble.”

“You always did know how to get yourself into heaps of it,” she'd smirked, and tossed a pair of balled up socks in his direction, just missing his head. “But you always managed to get yourself out of it too.”

“I knew you were trouble from the very second I met you, you know,” he'd said, as he got off the couch and wandered over to where she was so diligently working. Liking the way that simple white gold wedding band looked on her finger. He still hadn't gotten used to; it had only been a few months and even with that life growing in her belly, they were still very much enjoying being newlyweds. He liked it. Being a husband. He liked the simplicity and the comforts that came with the little things that took up their new life. Household chores and preparing meals and sharing a bed with the same warm body and beautiful face each and every day. Mundane to some. A welcome change and relief to him.

“I wasn't the one with the reputation for being difficult,” she'd reminded him. “I wasn't the one who was like a bear with a sole asshole even on his best days.”

“Yet here you are. Playing house with me. A good little wife. Giving me babies. So I must have done something right, huh?” he'd playfully nudged her with his elbow. “You stuck around. Through thick or thin. I put you through a lot of shit and agony and here you are. Here WE are.”

“You can't get rid of me that easily, Tyler Rake. You think you would have realized that by now.”

“Getting rid of you is the last thing I ever want.”

They'd stood in companionable silence; working quickly and efficiently together. Little boring tasks that they almost never got to experience. He'd never take things like that for granted again. And he'd grabbed a pair of her underwear from the fresh pile and hooking them around his finger, grinned as he swung them around.

“How'd we ever graduate to these, huh? These are not what I remember you wearing. You weren't wearing any the first time we...well...you know...”

“You're such a pig,” she'd grumbled, and tried to snatch them away. Frowning when he held them high above his head. Not an easy reach for a woman that only stood five foot three. “What is wrong with you? Seriously.”

“I thought you were trouble the second I met you. The way you shook my hand. The way you smiled at me. But I knew it for sure when I had you pinned against that wall and I put my hand down your shorts and realized that you weren't any underwear. Remember that? That first time? I knew I was in trouble but I didn't want to stop. I couldn't stop. I was surprised you were such a kinky little thing.”

“You've got issues. What is your major malfunction?”

“Nothing wrong with a little visit to the past. Especially when it involves being naked.”

“Would you stop?” she'd perched herself on her tip toes and frantically tried to grab the offending piece of clothing from his grasp. “What's gotten into you?”

“It's what hasn't gotten into you in a while,” he'd retorted, laughing when she'd directed a slap to his gut, his arms circling her waist when she'd lost her balance and tumbled into him. And they'd stood like that; her head against his chest, his eyes closed and his chin resting on the top of her head. Loving all those things about her that had become so familiar and comforting to him. The lingering scent of coconut shampoo that clung to her hair, the feel of her heart beating against him, those small and soft hands stroking up and down his back. This woman...the one that had seen him at his most fragile...who he owed his life to.

Her hands were on the back of his shoulders when she'd pulled away and looked up at him. Her eyes sparkling as she smiled. A smile he had once thought he'd never see again.

“I love you,” he'd told her. Three words that he had always hesitated on uttering before but now couldn't say enough. If Gaspar was still around he'd call him soft. Tell him he was whipped and a pussy and needed to get his balls back. But he wasn't around anymore.

A lot of people weren't.

“I know,” she'd said. “But not nearly as much as I love you.”

“Hey, this isn't a competition. And if it was, I'd win. I always do.”

“You have a very overinflated sense of yourself,” she'd chided.

He was her rock. He knew that. Even when he was still recovering and he was nothing more than a mere fraction of the man he once was. Even when she had to help nurse him back to health and he'd had to trust her completely with even the mundane things like feeding himself and brushing his teeth. But she'd stuck by him. Even when he felt humiliated that he even needed help with such things. Embarrassed that she was seeing him so vulnerable. Allowing her to see his tears of anger, frustration, and pain. She'd always said that he was the only one that made her feel safe and secure. Protected. Even when he wasn't at his best.

“Shit...” She'd grimaced when the baby had kicked her especially hard. Eyes closing and her forehead falling onto his chest.

“Even I felt that one.” He’d e'd move one hand from her waist to her ever growing stomach. Marvelling at the way he could feel their baby...his baby...moving inside of her. It may not have been his first time. Not his first child. But he was determined to enjoy every second of it and not take a single moment for granted. “See what I mean? Trouble just like her mom. Feisty as all hell. A boy wouldn't cause this many issues.”

“Boys come with a whole shit load of issues. After all, it was a boy that got me into this situation in the first place.”

“Come on now, I wasn't the only one that was having all the fun. You seemed to be enjoying yourself too. I didn't make this baby all on my own, you know.”

“It was fun,” she'd admitted. “It always is.”

“Yeah. It most definitely is.”

One of her hands came down to rest on top of his and they stood there together, feeling their child moving inside of her. Marvelling at all the kicks and wriggles. At the miracle that they had created. All because two people fell in love during the entirely wrong time and in the entirely wrong place.

“You need to take it easy there, sweetheart,” he'd spoken to his daughter, his hand moving in slow, comforting circles. “Go easy on your mum, okay? Daddy's already put her through enough to last a lifetime.”

“She listens to you already. She likes your voice.”

“Already takes after her mother. Isn't that one of the first things you said you liked about me? My voice?”

“It does funny things to my insides. Even now.”

“I like doing funny things to your insides,” he'd dropped a kiss on the top of her head and she'd looked up at him once again.

“I think we should go to bed.”

“It's only eight thirty.”

“I don't mean to sleep. I mean to do other things. Fun things. Things that help you sleep better.”

A slow grin had spread across his face.

He didn't need to be told twice.

*******

“What's going on in here?” he asks as he steps alongside the crib, where his tiny baby girl has managed to to shed herself of her tight swaddling and was preparing to whip herself up into a frenzy. She has his temper already; slow to anger but almost impossible to control once the fuse was fully lit. “What kind of trouble are you getting up to in here? How'd you get yourself into such a mess? Clever little thing, aren't you.”

The crying dies down. Settling down to a mere whimper. She recognizes her daddy's voice. His face. And she knows she's in good hands. The wailing replaced by an impossibly dramatic pout on someone so young.

“You really are your mother's daughter,” he says. “I recognize that look anywhere. How does a little one like you get yourself into trouble? Look at you...” he untangles the receiving blanket from between her legs and scoops her up from the crib. Lifting her to the safe and warm confines of his chest. A forearm supporting her bum, his palm on the back of her head. “It's okay now,” he croons, and presses a kiss to the side of her head. She has his hair; same texture and colour. His eyes. Even his nose and lips. He can hear his wife now. Complaining about doing all the leg work and going through all the pain, only to have the baby coming out looking just like him. “Daddy's here now. Everything is fine. You're okay now.”

After a quick diaper change, he carries her through the apartment and into the kitchen. That tiny little body laying perfectly along his forearm as he warms a bottle from the fridge. She fits so perfect in the crook of his arm; head nestled into the valley on his elbow, feet by his wrist. She's long. Lanky. Just like he'd been as a kid. “You're probably wondering why I'm out here doing this,” he speaks as he waits for the bottle to warm. “You know this is usually your mummy's thing. Getting up in the middle of the night. And I know she doesn't exactly use these silly things to feed you. But I thought we'd be nice and let her sleep. She does a lot for us, you know. She deserves to sleep.”

He sits on the couch as he feeds her; both feet on the coffee table, knees bent with her lying along his thighs. One hand holding the bottle and the fingers of the other exploring every inch of her. She is wondrous; big blue eyes and impossibly long dark lashes and freckles across the bridge of her nose. And has he talks to her in a deep and soothing tone, her gaze is focused intently on him. Eyes never leaving his, one of her tiny hands reaching for the hand that holds the bottle, all fingers curling around just one of his. He had forgotten what this was like. The pure magic of being a father. Knowing that you had helped create something so incredible. That you had played a part in bringing another human being into this world.

As crazy and fucked up as the world could be, that is. It gave him a sense of peace. The knowledge that when the end came, he'd go knowing that he had done something truly good and valuable with his life.

He stands and carries her over to the balcony window. Once again holding her with a forearm under her bum and a firm hand on the back of his head. “You see that out there...” he nods towards the skyline; twinkling lights of skyscrapers and glowing street lights and blazing stars. “...that can be a real scary place. There's a lot of really bad people out there. But there's a lot of really good people too. People that would protect you, no questions asked. People that already love you without even really knowing you. And somewhere out there, is some guy that's going to come into your life and probably break your heart. And you know what? That's okay. It's okay to get your heart broken. Because it makes you a better person. It makes you stronger. Even if you think it's going to kill you at the time.”

She stares up at him with those huge blue eyes. With so much wonder and trust that it it causes a lump of emotion to gather in his throat and blur his vision.

“You know, there was almost a time where this might not have happened. Where I might not have been here. Where it might have just been you and your mom. And if it wasn't for your mom, I probably wouldn't be here. She's something else, you know. She's the bravest and strongest person I've ever met in my entire life. And there were so many times where this could have been too much for her...where I could have been too much for her...and she could have just walked away. But she never did. She never gave up on me. Even when I was ready to give up on myself. She's the one you need to worry about, you know. She jokes around that I'm going to be the one that scares all the boys away but I have a feeling it's going to be her. She doesn't let anyone mess with the people she loves. She's a momma bear. She's ferocious and she's loyal and she will f...” he bites his tongue “...mess someone up if she needs to. I was even kind of scared of her when I first meet her. Not because she's scary looking or I was afraid she'd hurt me. Mind you, she probably could if she got mad enough. Like how she gets when I leave the toilet seat up in the middle of the night. She scared me because I'd never felt that way about anyone. At least not that quickly. You can be the strongest person in the world, but when that one person comes along, you can't stop it. No matter if the timing isn't right. No matter how screwed up things are. Even if it is the wrong place, wrong time. You're powerless. Your heart just takes over. The important thing you have to remember is that you let your heart and your head work at the same time. That's the only way things will be okay. Or at least that's how it worked for your mom and I.”

He adjusts his hold on her, bringing her up to rest against his chest. Fingers combing through her thick, silky hair, his other hand softly stroking her back.

“Your mom came into my life when I'd pretty much given up on everything. When I didn't even feel human any more. Where nothing mattered. She came into my life and rescued me. In every way a person can rescue someone. And I know she'll probably deny that if you ask her. She'd say that I'm the brave one. That I'm the one that rescues people. But she had the toughest job out of them all. I'm not the easiest person to love. And she knew that. Yet here she is. A year later and she's still sticking around. Still putting up with my crap. So I must be doing something right, yeah? She hasn't smothered me with a pillow in my sleep or put poison in my food or put a hit out on me.”

“You just had to ruin the moment,” that soft voice says from behind, and he watches her reflection through the window as she journeys over to them. Chestnut hair messy from sleep and falling loose to the middle of her back. She is heavier now; softer and curvier in all the right places. Having a baby will do that to you. But she's still the most beautiful woman he has ever seen. Even more so decked out in one of his shirts; the fabric hanging to well below her knees, sleeves rolled and bunched just about her elbows. “What are you two doing? It's late. Or really early. Depending on how you look at it.”

“We're just having a little daddy daughter bonding time.”

She squints her eyes and peers at the clock on the nearby wall. “It's ten after three.”

“Time means nothing when you have a baby. She doesn't know what time it is. And I barely sleep, so...”

“So what does this bonding time consist of? Shit talking me?”

“I only said that last part because I knew you were behind me. I said all good things, I swear. And I was telling her all my best stories.”

“Lord I really hope not,” she rubs his shoulders and presses a kiss to his back before sidling up beside him. “All your best stories are gory.”

“I'm saving those ones for when she's old enough to be able to kick someone in the balls if they're bothering her. So she doesn't have to rely on a brother to do it.”

“Not even two months into this and you're already contemplating another? Good luck doing that yourself. Let me know how it works out for you.”

The subject had come up once or twice. About whether or not this was a one off or there were other children in their future. After he'd lost his son and given up on life, he hadn't thought there'd be any other kids. It wasn't as if he lived the kind of life he'd be proud to bring a child into it. She'd been a complete surprise. They thought they'd been careful. Apparently they hadn't been careful enough.. But she wasn't a mistake. Far from it. A happy accident was more like it. Now that he'd gotten his feet wet again in the parenting pool, he was open to having more kids. He craved it, actually. Another two or three. And a modest house on a good parcel of land. Somewhere close to the beach. With a window that looked into the backyard that he could watch his children through. Where he could grow old and gray with the love of his life.

But he still had a lot of shit to deal with before any of that could happen.

She yawns loudly and steps in front of him; both arms wrapping around his waist she lays her head against him. “Are you okay?”

“Best I can be, I guess. Little sore. But what else is new.”

She just nods. She knows it goes beyond being 'a little sore'. She had seen the extent of his injuries. She'd lived out the horror right alongside of him. It had been his blood that soaked her that day on the bridge. But she also knows he isn't the type you fawn over. He doesn't like the attention. Feeling as if he's weak. Or that he may be a burden. He was still trying to get that confidence back. The ego takes a serious beating when you're left unable to do even the smallest of tasks for yourself. “You're having trouble sleeping?”

“When haven't I had trouble sleeping?”

“But it's worse now, isn't it. I know how many times you get up in the middle of the night. It's worse now.”

“Just a stage,” he assures her. “I'll be fine. How many times have we been through this, huh? How many times do I have to tell you not to worry about me?”

“A million. But I still won't listen.”

“That's never going to change,” he teases. “You didn't listen to me a year ago and you don't listen to me now. And you wonder why I say your daughter is going to be trouble.”

She grins up at him. “Why does she become just my daughter when you talk about trouble?”

“Because we both know who the real trouble maker is in this relationship,” he retorts, and presses a kiss to her forehead.

In silence they watch their daughter; the way her eyes shift between the two of them before slowing beginning to close, a yawn escaping her mouth. A surprisingly large one that ends in a tiny squeak. He's in awe of her. Of how tiny and fragile she is. How he'd managed to make something so amazing.

“She's beautiful,” he speaks around a lump of emotion that sits square in his throat. His emotions have been raw since that day in Dhaka. And even more so since becoming a father for a second time. He can hear Gaspar in his head again. Talking about how soft he was becoming. That he didn't even recognize him any more. That growing a heart this late in the game was going to be his biggest downfall and his most relentless enemy. “Like her mother.”

“She looks just like you.”

“I honestly don't see it,” he hopes he sounds a least a tad sincere.

His wife gives a derisive snort. “You have some seriously strong genes, Tyler Rake. Imagine if we had a boy? Probably be your splitting image. By the way...” she rubs his stomach and smiles up at him. “...you do the really big, strong man with a tiny baby thing very well. It's kind of sexy.”

“Just kind of? I was going for totally sexy. Insanely sexy. You might as well said mediocre sexy.”

“Don't expect me to stroke your ego at three in the morning.”

“Why not? Not like you've been stroking anything else lately.”

“Shhhh...” she places a finger over her lips. “...there's innocent ears in this room.”

“She's asleep. And even if she wasn't, she wouldn't understand what I was saying anyway. Besides, she's going to end up learning where she come from sooner or later.”

“Well let's make that later. Much later. And mediocre sexy? Really? As if you could ever be anything other than out of the world sexy.”

“You're lucky. I was going to have to file for divorce if you called me 'average sexy'.”

“You're too much,” she giggles, and dropping one of her arms from around his waist, runs the palm of her hand along the baby's hair. “And you're right. She is beautiful. She is perfect.”

“It's hard to believe sometimes, isn't it? That we made her? During all that craziness and all that madness, we actually made a life together. Surreal, huh? That something so beautiful could come out of all of that?”

“A lot of beautiful things came out of that. We just have a hard time recognizing what they are sometimes.”

He nods in agreement. Sniffling noisily and swallowing heavily when the weight of emotion becomes almost too much to bear. He's never had to hide this side of himself when it came to her. After all, she was the one who'd successfully bulldozed all of his walls to the ground. So it comes as no surprise to either of them when the tears finally do come; blazing hot against his skin, the taste of salt stinging his lips.

“Baby...” she turns to face him, reaching up to take his face in her hands. “...what's wrong? What...?”

“Nothing's wrong. I just...” he struggles to find the words, inhaling deeply and releasing a shaky breath. “...thank you...” he says. “...for her. For you. For us.”

“I think you played a pretty big part in her being here,” she reminds him. “It's not like I did this alone.”

“I don't deserve all of this. I don't deserve her. I don't deserve you. This...this life...” he shakes his head. “...this was meant for someone else. A better man than me.”

She chews pensively on her bottom lip and regards him through her own tears. He knows she won't let them come. She's been the one holding back lately. When they'd met, she'd been the high strung and overly emotional one. Always on edge. Waiting for the other shoe to drop. He'd been that calm, cool, and collected one. The one that held shit together when it threatened to blow apart. Talking her down off the ledge while trying to keep both of them...and eventually Ovi...alive. Since the baby she'd changed. Her motherly instincts and her love for their child could never be matched by anyone else. But she had closed herself off in other ways. She became the strong and silent one. The one who always held her emotions in check. He figured it was all that time she spent helping him get back on his feet. What she'd seen and had to endure would harden anyone.

But he'd be lying if he didn't say he wasn't concerned. If he didn't find himself wishing for that emotional and broken girl she'd once been.

She was out there. And he knew where.

She was still back in Dhaka.

Still standing on that bridge.

#Tyler Rake #Tyler Rake fan fiction #Extraction fan fiction #Chris Hemsworth Tyler Rake #Tyler Rake x OFC #Tyler Rake fan fic #Extraction fan fic #I Found-Tyler Rake/Esme Rake

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