#and sometimes people need someone to tell em and sometimes that makes people mad so i will mind my business

[foxcassius]

i've been really determined to be positive about this job and i think it is paying off, i am getting things done (even if i have to stay late) and i still feel happy and ready to go to work every day and no single class or single hour of the day feels heavy or unbearable. but i feel like katie is not being positive and is taking some stuff too personally and being too like aggressive from the get-go about some things and whenever she complains idk what to say bc i really refuse to commiserate bc that will start to make me miserable but i also dont want to tell her "take it up with management and do something about it or stop complaining" bc that sounds mean but genuinely. most things she just needs to talk to the respective management about bc its not going to get fixed if she complains to me yknow.

[f1byjessie]

A PICTURE IS WORTH A THOUSAND WORDS ━━ LN4.

sometimes the right words are hard to come across, and sometimes everything you need to say can be captured in an image.

( lando norris x photographer!reader )

━━ part four.

“Saw McLaren posted pics of the new car,” Jack says in lieu of a greeting when he sees you after the weekend. He picks up his pace and crosses the distance to meet you where you’re fumbling with the keys to your “office”, and then he takes a few of the many equipment bags you’re attempting to juggle, saying as he does so, “You take any of those or no?”

You laugh, “Ah, no. They actually hire on a whole studio crew that does that. They’ve got lights, green screens, special camera lenses, the whole lot. The post-production on those photos is mad though.” You get the door unlocked and usher him inside, “I got to sit in on it once, and it’s crazy how much work goes into getting just a couple week’s worth of promotional content.”

He sets your bags down where you direct him to and then offers you a snarky grin, “Still probably would’ve looked cooler if you took ‘em, to be fair.”

It makes you laugh again. Jack seems to be good at that, and it feels nice to get along so well with someone you work with. You’ve found a surprising friend in him. At the end of your conversation on Friday, you’d exchanged numbers and he’d made you promise to reach out if you needed him for anything. You hadn’t, but he’d still sent you an unflatteringly angled picture of Kyle Walker from after their match against Newcastle, followed quickly with━ “use this in the next media drop thx,” and the chatter had gone from there.

You set down your own bags. “Well, thank you. Pretty sure it’s not as fun as this job, though.”

And you mean it. You’ve had opportunities to switch over to studio photography, and though you respect the people who do it and the unique challenges it poses in its own right, there’s nothing like being upfront and personal with all the action, getting to see the athletes in their element and know them on a level that goes beyond an hour or two shoot. You wouldn’t trade it for the world.

“Wait,” you pause, hands stopping just above where you’re ready to start sorting through your equipment, “since when did you keep up with Formula One?”

Jack shrugs. “I don’t. But you work for that team, yeah? So I figured I might as well see what they’re all about.”

“Well, if you need something to do during the summer, let me know and I’ll see what I can do,” you tell him, resuming your sorting. “They give me extra tickets for each race but they usually end up going to waste.”

You don’t bring up the falling out you had with your parents at eighteen when you told them you were going to pursue photography or the fact that you haven’t really talked to them in years because of it. You also don’t mention that due to the strenuous, near-constant traveling and the strict schedule of your job, your friendships are limited to the athletes you work with and the other McLaren staff that travel with you━ all of whom have passes of their own, for obvious reasons.

Jack, thankfully, doesn’t ask about it either. Whether he’s made his own assumptions or respects that it’s probably a sore subject, he leaves it alone and the two of you carry on in companionable silence.

You get your equipment unzipped from the bags and organized across the room per your system, guiding your temporary helper with pointed fingers to where it all should go.

The silence is only broken again when he asks you a question. “You got a favorite driver?”

It’s so out of the blue that you nearly jump, startled by the suddenness of it against the quietness of the room. But then you laugh and shake your head. “Officially no, but just between the two of us, me and Lando started at the same time so he’s got a special place in my heart. He’s also my best friend.”

Jack raises an eyebrow, “Oh yeah?” Despite the persona he puts on, you think he secretly loves gossip. “How’d he take the news about you being with Ward, then? ‘Cause I’d have some choice things to say to any friend of mine if they got with a prick like that.”

You purse your lips, divert your gaze to avoid Jack’s eyes, and shrug, fiddling with the neck strap of your camera as you do so. “I don’t know.”

“You ‘don’t know?’”

You shrug again and feign checking over the settings as if your camera’s aperture is suddenly the most interesting thing in the world. “He hasn’t been picking up my calls,” you start, “or answering my texts since the paps released the pics, so.”

When you glance back up, Jack’s making a face. “So, your best friend finds out you’re dating a total bellend, and instead of asking you about it or at the very least taking the piss, he ignores you?”

When he puts it like that, you feel a bit stupid for being more sad than you are angry.

All you can do is shrug.

INSTAGRAM.

liked by mancity, jackgrealish, and 241,976 others

tagged: jackgrealish

yourusername ladies and gentlemen, jack grealish (i was threatened into posting these, send help pls)

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You decide that if Lando gets to be petty, then so do you.

The thing is, you’d told Lando you wouldn’t replace him with any of the guys from Manchester City, and you’d meant it━ you still mean it, despite your frustrations and annoyances with him telling you otherwise.

But if he’s going to play games, then so are you.

Technically you hadn’t started the relationship with Garrett willingly, but Lando doesn’t know that, and even if you had that doesn’t give him the right to go about ignoring you. You’ve been supportive when he’s gotten girlfriends━ you even ate greasy pizza, drank cheap wine, and cried watching The Notebook together when he ended his long-term relationship back in 2022. He could at least pretend to be supportive, or better yet he could pick up the fucking phone. 

As pathetic as it sounds, you’d let him yell at and berate you if it just meant he’d answer your calls. Because having Jack around to gossip with and shoot the shit is nice, and he really does help you not feel so alone at Etihad Campus, but Lando’s your best friend and he has been for years now. There’s nobody that understands you as well as he does, even if he is a twat half the time, and what you need now most of all is that particular Lando brand of annoying to cheer you up.

The door opens, drawing your attention from where you’re scrolling through McLaren’s newest posts. Garrett stands in the opening.

The memory of that night still lingers like a bad taste in your mouth, bitter and unpleasant. You’ve managed to avoid him for the most part in the time since then, ignoring the looks he shoots your way out on the field or in the weight room, and lucky enough that his meetings with the physio team keep him preoccupied so that he can’t seek you out in between training sessions. You’d known it was inevitable that you’d have to face him, but that doesn’t stop the dread from pooling in your stomach when you see him standing in the doorway with his arms crossed and an eyebrow raised as he surveys the makeshift office you’ve done up for yourself.

“They couldn’t find you an actual office?” He comments, looking disdainfully towards your desk and the large Manchester City logo emblazoned across the front.

You shrug, wishing he’d just get to the point. “I’m only here for a few months. Doesn’t matter much to me. What do you want?”

He takes a step farther into the room and closes the door behind him, taking his sweet time to cross the distance toward the seats. When he’s finally lowered down into one, he looks up to you with a nonchalance that fills you immediately with anger.

“I’m making some amendments to our agreement,” he announces.

“Like hell you are.”

He raises an eyebrow. “Did you seriously expect people to believe we’re a couple if we never actually do anything to give off the impression of being a couple?”

You scowl. Obviously, you hadn’t expected to just skate by on the coattails of pictures from a single night. You’d known from the very beginning that you would eventually need to make another public appearance together at the very least if you wanted to keep the paparazzi fed and encourage the idea to the media that you’re in a committed relationship with one another. You’d just been hoping you would’ve had more time until then.

“I’m not an idiot, Garrett,” you grumble, crossing your arms in your seat. You had been looking through pictures from the day’s morning practice, but now you think having to look at any more of Kevin De Bruyne’s grinning face will make you lose your mind when you feel the furthest thing from happy.

“Obviously,” Garrett scoffs. “But you’re the one who said I get one kiss and nothing more. Newsflash, love━” your scowl deepens, “━couples do more than just kiss one time.”

“So what are you suggesting?”

He pulls his phone from the pocket of his joggers and swipes across the screen for a few moments of anticipatory silence. “Well,” he finally says, “it’s the sixteenth now. We haven’t got a match until the twenty-sixth. Go on a date with me this weekend.”

You can’t say no. There’s no plausible excuse for you to get out of it, and deep down you know the only way you can get rid of Garrett is to just do what he says and hope the media make their conclusions about his change quick enough that you can ditch him before the summer break.

At least during the Formula One season, you can use traveling as a reason to get out of dates. When the Champion’s League starts back up he’ll be traveling around Europe a bit more than he is now, and there’s always a chance you could be in the same country at the same time, but the likelihood of your schedules aligning is slim and that means you’ll be safe from any ventures out into public.

But for the time being, you’re stuck.

“Okay,” you reluctantly agree.

He claps his hands, a deceptively cheerful grin on his face. If you didn’t already think of him as the worst prick you’ve ever met, you might’ve found it charming. It’s the same smile he used to flash at you in your first week when he was trying to cozy up and ease his way into your good graces. The sight of it makes you sick to your stomach, now.

“Great,” he rises from his seat. “We’ll do some shopping, get some lunch━ make a full day out of it.”

At this point, you don’t care what he has planned. You just want him to leave you alone so you can try to at least pretend like you’re gonna finish the rest of the work you need to get around to.

Garrett’s made his way to the door and has his hand reaching for the handle when he turns back around and gives you a smirk. “Might wanna work on your happy face, though, love,” he comments, gesturing towards you with a nod of his head. “‘Cause if you look like that in front of the paps they definitely aren’t gonna be very convinced that you love me.”

Just to spite him, you let your scowl deepen. “I don’t need your advice. I know how to handle myself, Garrett.” You say his name like a curse━ like the very feeling of it on your tongue causes you pain.

If he notices, he doesn’t comment. His face turns thoughtful, but there’s still the smugness painted across his features that makes you so unfathomably annoyed. “You must be pretty familiar with the paps if you’re always around those drivers, yeah?” He knows the answer to his question already, so you’re not sure why he’s even asking.

He stays silent, though, like he’s genuinely expecting an answer, so you shrug your shoulders. “Obviously.”

“Obviously,” he repeats back to you.

His laughter is all you hear echoing in your ears even once he’s long gone.

Until your phone starts to ring and Lando's name flashes across the screen.

━━ tags: @maih23 @urfavnoirette @leclercsluv @f1luvur @formulaal @a-disturbing-self-reflection @starlightpierre @chezmardybum @marshmummy @405rry @sideboobrry11 @d3kstar @mcmuppet @happylittlereader @casperlikej @5starl1ght

━━ a/n: cliffhanger hehe~ also, i promise we're getting to ACTUAL formula one stuff soon

[domreader-headcannon-scenarios]

Hello! I really love your works sm, can i request a sfw or nsfw head cannons of the angels from WHB? Thank you!!

I’m so glad you liked them!! So I’m tryna write the angels as best I can Gabriel is the only one I’ve met outside of a event, I’ve seen the other two in the Halloween event! I like em but ngl they have…unique kinks I needed to google hifth

I hope you enjoy!!

Over all cw: blaspheme (I think?? ((Angels worshiping you)), death (not main characters), abuse of power

Sfw/nsft hcs on Angels!

-

Gabriel

Cw: inappropriate boners,

He basically a guard dog standing over your shoulder 24/7 to keep you safe, he calls you his ‘Lord/Lady/Highness’ and has an army of angels who think the same of you

He’s not very affectionate but if you just say ‘hold me/my hand’ or ‘kiss me’ he’d do it in a heart beat. As his God he only wants you pleased

He’s a terrible cook and somehow steals food and is terrifying good at getting away with it (it must be an angel thing??) he dosent even lie saying he made it, he’s just vague where it came from (only once have you caught him in the act and you made him apologize, but the person gave him the food regardless)

He dust a lot in your home and you cant help but notice the ‘home made’ duster he ‘found’ has feathers matching his wings…

Nsft

Canon Kink: Hierophilia; deriving sexual pleasure from religion, religious places and objects as well as find the act itself religious

He enjoys watching you participate in religious activities…maybe too much. He also finds pleasure in treating you as his god.

You jokingly thought of making him go to church, only for him to jump at the chance. He lowkey regretted it when you didn’t touch him, and made him stay squirming in his seat instead of helping him get off. He for whatever reason thought you’d let him jerk off or would touch him yourself as you were holy, nothing you did was wrong but…touching himself in this place is

You’ve actually caught him touching himself to you praying before, he got bashful upon getting caught but you swear you’ve heard him doing it after that, you just don’t catch him in the act (though you’ve caught him awkwardly standing by and adjusting himself)

He’s got a adorablely small and sensitive cock and he genuinely doesn’t need it touched to cum, roll it between your fingers for a few minutes and he’s trembling as he spills out all his cum

Michael

Cw: murder, inappropriate boners

He’s strict with everyone around you, but not you, in his eyes you are the law since he serves only you, you cant do wrong

He’s terrible if you have guest, he demands they now to you and though he’ll settle if you tell him to, he watches them like a hawk and makes sure nothing gets out of hand

You see that leash? If you get mad and pull on it, he will calm down and you have his full attention, give it another tug downwards, and he’ll drop to his knees in front of you, and anyone else in the room

He likes brushing and styling your hair, he’ll try to help you bathe, insisting you don’t need to lift a finger, he will take care of everything, just relax

Nsft

Canon Kink: Erotophonophilia; ‘Muder kink’, deriving sexual gratification from killing or watching someone get killed (BOY IS THIS A HARD KINK TO CASUALLY WORK WOTH)

If push comes to shove he has a habit of killing people who harass you too much/threaten you, but he gets…really excited afterwards and is pressing his thighs together to hide his erection, especially if you’re clearly not in the mood

You’ve seen him get in fights while still aroused from the last kill an honestly, when in public you sometimes just force a chastity cage on him to discourage him acting out

Though he believes self pleasure, or just the act in general is…sinful, he will do anything for you with no qualms, he only feels good when you touch him anyway

He suffered from wet dreams whenever you’re around him or he has objects with your scent

When he want to fool around desperately he will walk right up to you, kneel and beg you to touch his neither regions, stroking, slapping, pinching, doesn’t matter as long as you touch him

Raphael

Cw: messy kitchens, messy person, furniture abuse,

He’s messy and kinda gets annoying at times since he discovered how much fun it is to smash condiment packages

He’s good about cleaning, and he even cooks to make up for the mess…but he’s a sloppy cook too but at least it’s not intentional this time

He doesn’t understand that the furniture isn’t trying to hurt you and doesn’t need to be punished. He’s broken threee tables, one bed post and five chairs since he’s moved to being your ‘Guardian Angel’, all for tripping you or you stubbed your toe on them

He’s not affectionate but he’s not distant, he just follows your lead, he stands close by and if you ask him to come over he flops in your lap and looks up at you like a puppy. He likes when you watch tv and let him lay across your lap, he falls asleep easily that way

Nsft

Canon Kink: Automysophilia; getting sexual gratification from defiling oneself, being dirty or defiled

He enjoys getting messy with cum, blood, dirt, just about anything. He will be blissed if you strip him and cover him in…well it’s up to you ;)

He has no qualms with jerking off in front of you if you don’t want to touch him while he’s too messy, but he wants you to be fully clothed while he’s sprawled out naked in front of you

He’s fucked slime before since it feels…weirdly good around his shaft, to the point he gets excited when he sees it around the house. You had to punish him for thinking he could ‘fool around’ with it then hide it away again

He’s got a very sensitive halo, while other angels get off to them being touched like a devils horns, he avoids it since it brings him to his knees in seconds

[jungwnies]

✰ syn ’ safe for work a-z boyfriend for park sunghoon ✰ pairing ’ boyfriend!sunghoon x gn!reader

requested!

a ⋆ affection - how affectionate are they?

he’s not the most affectionate

especially in the beginning he is not the one to initiate it

he’s a very awkward person as we all know so don’t expect him to cling onto you start day one

once he’s warmed up to you though he doesn’t get clingy

but he gets very comfortable being physical with you

he’s better with his words than he is expressing his affection through actions

but he’s still cute so it’s okay

b ⋆ bonding - how often do they bond with you?

all the time

it’s the little things he does

like i said he’s awkward so he never really knows what to do

but he always makes time for you

sometimes you don’t realize what he’s doing is for you but it’s okay because he likes it that way

he’s secretly bonding with you all the time tbh

c ⋆ communication - do they keep in touch with you when they're away?

yes

he texts you a lot actually

his confidence sky rockets on text tbh

tries lame pickup lines on you when he’s on tour

takes pictures of everything just to show you

d ⋆ dates - how often do they set up a date for you two?

not often

he’s not a homebody but his dates are super spontaneous

so don’t expect them to be well organized because well

they’re not

but he does things for you often

it just doesn’t need to be classified as a date

e ⋆ essential - what is the thing that is important to them?

the relationships he builds with people are extremely important

he really values the people around him

he just has a hard time expressing his gratitude

f ⋆ friends - how did the friendship start?

i feel like he saw you around

inside of a store or something

he thought you were cute but he was too scared to flirt so he probably got someone to get your number for him

honestly he probably asked staff to get it

g ⋆ gross - what is the thing he hates in your relationship?

he hates when you lie

boy he hates liars so much

even though he lies sometimes and he’s a little devious

when it comes to lies about the relationship or lies that can ruin the relationship

it just makes him mad

he has no secrets with you

so hopefully you have none with him either

h ⋆ hugs - do they like hugs? how do they feel?

they’re awkward but safe

in the beginning it was definitely more awkward

he didn’t know where to hug you

how to hug you

how to make you comfortable

but when the relationship started to settle

it felt safe around him

he held you like he’d never let go

pause cus this is reawakening my sunghoon bias-ness in me

i ⋆ intercourse - how are they during intercourse?

oh oh oh

same with his hugs

they’re awkward

but why is he low key goood

like

he knows what he’s doing

he’s hitting on the right spots

touching all the right spots

he knows the anatomy of your body really well

j ⋆ jealousy - how jealous do they get?

oh ‘em geee

he is so jealous

but not toxic

but low key toxic

k ⋆ kiss - how good are they at kissing?

he’s great

he knows what he’s doing

they’re always so soft and delicate

but so passionate at the same time

loves being the one to deepen the kiss ugh

l ⋆ love - how do they show their love to you?

just little things

he doesn’t like making a big deal out of things

but he does small things for you that make a big deal in your life

he will remember everything you like tbh

m ⋆ mad - how often do you argue?

not often

but when you guys do argue

communication is soooo bad

n ⋆ naughty - how do they deal with you annoying them?

sunghoon ignores it

or tells you to stop

hes not into the annoying things

he has a short temper when it comes to things that bother him

o ⋆ open - how often do they open up to you?

honestly

i don't personally see him as an open person

he dozes off a lot and his problems don't really ever leave his mind

it took him awhile to be honest for him to be completely comfortable with you

but when he's at that stage he's super open

usually when he's upset he'll tell you, but his prefers to sulk

p ⋆ pet names - how are they with pet names?

babe

baby

and jagi

and sweetheart

sometimes prince(ss)

in the beginning it was just your name though >.>

q ⋆ quiet - silent treatment?

he doesn't give to you often to be honest

but usually he will when you guys get into an argument

sunghoon sulks a lot okay leave HIM ALONE

he has a hard time communicating how he feels :c

r ⋆ ramble - how often do they talk about you to others?

oh he is a BRAGGER

he loves talking about you

and how good you treat him

he's always like "hmp, you wish you had a bae like me."

LIKE ?!?!?!?

s ⋆ soft - how soft are they to you?

sunghoon is not soft with you

but when you smile

it melts him to be honest

he becomes liquid

and vice versa

i mean, have you seen his smile??? it's precious 😪

t ⋆ think - what reminds them of you?

clothes

every time he goes shopping

he thinks of you

and what he can bring you

he loves dressing you up

he's like a mini fashionista when it comes to you

it's so cute

his whole face lights up when he sees you wearing something you bought for him

u ⋆ unhappy - what makes them break if you break up with them?

i think the fact he got so comfortable with you

and now it's over

he doesn't know if he'd be able to open up like that ever again tbh

he doesn't have his favorite shoulder to lean on anymore

whose arms is he going to cry in when he's overwhelmed

literally the scent of your perfume/cologne lingers and sends him into tears

literally cannot forget you

v ⋆ vacation - how are they with long distance relationships?

he is so bad with this

his communication skills are already so bad

he doesn't leave you on read or anything like that

but when he's super busy he kinda forgets to text

he doesn't even see the message

but he's quick to apologize and make it up to you

w ⋆ wholesome - the sweetest thing they ever did to you?

when he realizes he hasn't been as good as a boyfriend

he will always find a way to make it up

and it's ALWAYS he sweetest things ever

it's those little things that are like "i can't believe you remembered this"

and he's just like "well of course i did, i love you." 😭😭😭

x ⋆ extra headcanon

the first time this boy said he loved you

he was a mess

he was so nervous oh em geee

he fiddled with his fingers and was so nervous

and when you said it first????

he basically melted in his chair

he literally disintegrated into thin air

y ⋆ young and beautiful - (how long does it last?)

i feel like in the beginning his relationships are short lived

he's not a long term kind of guy

but he actually feels that bond with you

well, you're stuck with him

for literally ever

z ⋆ zzz - how do they sleep with you?

he's very much loose spoon

he likes to big spoon but very loosely when it's night time

he doesn't like people all up in his sleep space

but for you he make the exception!!

he snores though not gonna lie

not loud

but sometimes

it can keep you up at night 😗

2022 © jungwnies thanks for reading! reblogs & likes are appreciated!

[soopiroth]

super tips with soup #1 - staying safe in the tumblr agere community!

Hi, everyone! Call me Soup! I'm an age regressor, but I've got a bit of that babysitter blood in me, so today, I'm gonna try to embrace the big bro spirit and give you guys all some good advice! So here are some pro tips with your buddy Soup on staying safe in the agere community!

CG Applications? No Way!

I know what you're thinking... "But Soup! If I don't put out an application, how will I find a CG?!" The truth of it is, even if some people have safely gotten CGs through them, and even if some people apply to them in good faith, they're just not safe! Plenty of people can lie to you through them or apply with the intent of taking advantage of you! Your best bet is to try and make friends instead without the intent of making them your CG immediately. It lets you get to know them as a person without them being your CG, and if you trust them, you can ask them to babysit you for a bit!

Don't Feed The Trolls!

What do I mean by that? When a harasser, gore-poster, or overall jerk swoops into the community, spamming people or messaging them to say rude or unwanted things, don't interact with 'em! That's what they want! They want to make you mad, or sad! Don't let 'em see you down! Block them and report them and then get outta there! Go do something that makes you happy or talk to someone you trust about how it made you feel.

If It Sucks, Hit The Bricks!

If someone's trying to interact with you in a way that makes you feel uncomfortable, or is trying to extort sexual content from you, leave! Just like trolls, they want you to give them what you want. But unlike trolls, their goals aren't to upset you, most of the time, They want what makes them happy even if it makes you uncomfortable. That's not good at all! When that happens, you have full permission to use SOUP'S SWEAR PASS, even if you're a regressor that doesn't like to swear, because sometimes, "grown-up" words like that make me feel more in-control of a situation because I'm showing people that I'm not just small. Tell 'em to #@$%& off! (And then block them, if you need to.)

Handling Unclear & Uncomfortable Situations!

Sometimes, it's hard to tell if someone's trying to make you uncomfortable or not. If you're not sure, first, state your boundaries, proud and loud and clear! "I do not like this, this makes me uncomfortable. I would like you to stop." Most reasonable people will back off at this point, and apologize. However, if they keep trying to make you do something that makes you uncomfortable, THAT'S when you are free to start being even more firm, and even a bit mean if you need to! It's okay and nobody will blame you for telling someone to not make uncomfortable advances toward you and the like.

(I will note, sometimes, discomfort is something you SHOULD feel. Not from people pressing you to do things that make you feel gross, but from things like questioning marginalization in the community. For example, if someone makes a post about racism in the community and it makes you uncomfortable, ask yourself why. Is it because you're a victim of the racism and you're scared for yourself? Or is it because you worry you might be perpetuating the racism in the community? It's okay and good to feel uncomfortable about participating in stuff like that, but a person addressing it isn't doing it to coax you into doing bad things. They're trying to bring awareness to issues in the community. Ask yourself what you can do better or if there's anything you need to do at all to help. Don't try and fix the whole community, because you're only one person, but you can do what one person can!)

Come Back Later!

If you're not sure what to make of a situation online, you can always come back later if/when you're feeling bigger, or ask someone you trust to help you make heads or tails of it. It also helps to take a little calm-down break and think things through. When you think you might respond a bit too fast or recklessly, take a deep breath, go take a break, do something else for a bit, then come back and see what you think now.

Read It All? Good Work!

These tips should be able to help you stay safe out there! If anyone has any more tips or things I should change, comment, reblog, or send me an ask! I'm happy to take feedback! I also wanna know how I should tag this stuff!

One Last Thing!

Would you guys want to see more of these from me? I've got a few ideas already, like taking care of Big Tasks while regressed, managing that so-called "impure regression" in a few of its forms, namely the ones I deal with, (and why I think that's a bit of a mean term for it), and taking care of yourself by yourself!

Thanks For Reading!

Now go get out there and have some fun, champ!

[mulletmitsuya]

Toman Groupchat (everyone's here again, well most of em)

Warnings: swearing, suggestive, mentions of periods, mentions of drugs, mentions of pregnancy

Desc: Mikey and Izana realize the actions necessary for Emma to get pregnant, and they don't like it (also Yuzuha and Senju r gay, sorry)

Emma: Mikey while you're at the store could you pls buy me pads

Mikey: ayt

Mikey: your pussy size is large right?

Smiley: ayo

Angry: there's a reason for dm guys😕

Baji: LMAO

Emma: :(

Emma: that's not how it works

Senju: me personally, I wouldn't take this level of disrespect

Senju: that's crazy

Draken: Mikey you dumb fuck

Rindou: is that how periods work?

Rindou: the bigger the pussy the heavier the flow?

Rindou: holy shit

Rindou: i'm gonna add that to my new song

Sanzu: why

Rindou: listen

Rindou: "the bigger the pussy the heavier the flow"

Rindou: "no pussy can beat my rap game tho"

Rindou: 🔥

Sanzu: what the fuck

Izana: that may be the worst thing i've ever heard

Ran: no, let him do what he wants

Ran: please rap those exact words on your next gig

Emma: guys can you not I'm already in a bad mood 😭

Hina: Emma-chan do you need me to come over?

Emma: yes pls. we should have a girls day :)

Draken: if you guys need me i'll be at the shop with Inupi and Shin

Emma: okay ❤❤

Mikey: you didn't answer the question bruh

Emma: just take large😐

Izana: why r u in a bad mood I just gave you ice cream

Emma: cause of my period

Emma: i didn't expect it to come

Yuzuha: do you not have a calender

Emma: no it's just i thought i'd be pregnant by now

Emma: me and Ken have been trying for a baby everyday for the last 2 months so i thought it would have worked :(

Izana: k

Baji: r you guys as Emma's older brothers just gonna let this happen

Baji: can't believe you said that Emma

Mikey: wdym

Izana: ?

Baji: Emma just told us that Draken has been blowing her back out everyday for the past 2 months

Kazutora: yooooo

Hina: guys😐

Baji: y'all r tripping

Mikey: ...

Mikey: Ken-chin☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️

Izana: what the fuck Draken

Senju: must be nice Emma😊

Senju: great relationship, great house, great penis

Senju: i'm really happy for you guys (when is it my turn to be happy, i'm so sick of this)

Yuzuha: lmao good for you Emma

Yuzuha: and Senju you're literally famous

Izana: i'm literally going to kill you

Draken: ...?

Emma: are you guys serious right now

Mikey: you guys have sex

Mikey: ☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️

Draken: i-

Draken: she's my wife

Draken: for 4 years now

Izana: what makes you think that means you can touch her???

Mikey: i'ma tell Shinichiro btw😐

Kazutora: someone lost NNN lmao

Ran: only single people do NNN so they can feel rewarded for their virginity and feel like it matters and that it's worth something when it's not

Kazutora: yes

Kazutora: let me have something damn

Angry: i'm the champ of NNN just btw😡💙

Angry: wait that was before i saw Rans message :(

Smiley: sometimes you do this to yourself

Emma: Manjiro get the fucking pads

Mikey: k, but i don't wanna talk to you anymore

Yuzuha: "adult man baby cannot fathom that his sister has sexual relations with her husband"

Yuzuha: is that about right

Mikey: i'm not a man baby

Mikey: does this mean the same with Hina and Mitchy?????

Mikey: 🤢🤮😭😰

Mikey:

Hina: you're just mad cause the only thing you ride is your bike

Hina: i'm sorry i didn't mean to say that

Hina: i apologize 😔

Baji: get it Hina, eat him up

Baji: dumb ass, pubeless ass, broke ass, b.o smelling ass, no bitches ass mf

Mikey: PUBELESS???

Mikey: I HAVE SO FUCKING MANY DUDE DONT PLAY WITH ME RN

Mikey: I'M A GROWN ASS MAN

Baji: yet you can barely grow any hair on your body

Emma: he tried to grow a stubble once and got an infection☺

Kakucho: the same happened with Izana haha

Kakucho: ...i'm sorry

Izana: 100 pushups

Izana: now

Kakucho: Izana please

Kakucho: i just had a gallon of ice-cream

Kakucho: please

Izana: your begging will amount to nothing

Izana: do you want 150

Kakucho: 😞

Takemitchy: leave my boy alone 😕✊

Izana: maybe put on some deodorant first

Takemitchy: ...i don't smell tho

Izana: Hina tell him

Hina: tell him what😅

Hina: there's nothing to tell babe❤

Hina: I love you so much more than anything even

Takemitchy: ...i'll go take a shower😕

Yuzuha: free Hina

Yuzuha: you deserve a woman, they smell nice

Senju: i smell nice😚

Senju: and i'm so smoll

Senju: i'm so microscopic

Senju: maybe we could compare hand sizes Yuzuha🤗

Yuzuha: what r you doing

Baji: why are you acting like a pick me

Senju: cause i want her to pick me tf🤨

Senju: anyway

Senju: Yuzuha☺❤

Yuzuha: uh

Senju: one date?🤗

Yuzuha: uhm

Yuzuha: ykw fuck it, sure ig

Senju: ...

Senju: I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND OMG

Senju: GONNA START A LIVE ON INSTAGRAM

Senju: MY FANS R GONNA BE SO HAPPY😭😭😭😭❤

Yuzuha: ?

Sanzu: poor girl

Sanzu: she copes by feeding her delusions

Sanzu: a shame

Mikey: is that why she's so happy all the time?

Sanzu: yeah

Baji: aren't you delusional?🤨

Sanzu: i'm very normal

Ran: oh please

Rindou: and how exactly do you cope?🤨

Sanzu: i don't need to cope i'm a fucking superstar

Sanzu: also ketamine

Rindou: 😒

[crispyfriedshark]

Thoughts for Yandere Au of The Fangame "Resident Lover" PART 2:

𝑫𝒂𝒏𝒊𝒆𝒍𝒂 𝑫𝒊𝒎𝒊𝒕𝒓𝒆𝒔𝒄𝒖:

- Everyone was shocked, the most adorable(not her abs tho) and innocent, THE youngest Dimitrescu to be THAT violent, it taken 4 people and her sisters to stop her from almost killing the person who decided to touch you, suddenly placing their arms around you? Infront of her?, Pray for the person's face because it was almost not recognizable after everyone stopped Daniela.

-Territorial, AS IN, she whould toss her jacket and say "wear this, so you can feel I'm always with you" , whould follow you sometimes, she often replace you're shampoo similar to one she use, any items? Replaced.

-often pop up out of nowhere whenever you didn't tell her where did you go or there was a group project that you forgot to tell her, her eyes when she see you with someone other than her was scary it's like she's ready to pounce anytime soon

-Angie have to sleep with her aunty because Daniela was soo mad that when you woke up from her "punishment" next morning you look like a dog's chew toy, bite marks every where.

𝑨𝒍𝒄𝒊𝒏𝒂 𝑫𝒊𝒎𝒊𝒕𝒓𝒆𝒔𝒄𝒖/𝑷𝒓𝒐𝒇𝒆𝒔𝒔𝒐𝒓 𝑫:

-Elegance and Class, of course no one whould expect a thing, so why the hell she have 5 sculpture of you?, finest details like those statues you adore

-Having the power she have, she whould bend you're schedule so you can stay longer in her class, "teaching" you everything.

-There were one time a student who spreads a rumors about a five sculpture of you found in the arts class, no one believes them(shame), although people where confuse now on where was this person who spread the rumor, last time they found em' was talking with professor D(also the day you found out about the statues)

-Jealousy was the most scariest thing she shows to you, imagine getting Locked(for 5 weeks) to her room only her trusted servants can visit you and offer your needs, she whould punish you if you disobey.

-It took THE Headmistress to ask where were you, and Alcina finally calming down she let you go, but of course everyone was worried why you look like you run away from a dragon........ ..because you almost did, and that day you realize you can't run away from her.

𝑨𝒏𝒈𝒊𝒆 𝑩𝒆𝒏𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒊𝒏𝒕𝒐:

-The party animal, THE Angie beneviento,THE Miss "I can drink more than 50 shots" who whould have though she WAS that scary, it was unexpected really, first she was all very happy around everyone but the moment she saw you getting hit on by some random gals because you are too wasted that you didn't know shit, ohhh girl, to tell you that she actually throw herself and claw the girl that flirted to you, it was bloody for sure everyone have to stop her, she was yelling in Italian for sure, and dragged you out

-Jealousy cannot be avoided especially in the relationship with her, truth to tell, you already told everyone you are dating her but some says otherwise, knowing that Angie is Asexual and being sweet and affectionate was already a display before you two was a thing it was hard, some girls whould sometimes flirt with you even Infront of her not knowing you two are REALLY a thing, God knows how much you learn how fast she speak while she cuss the living shit out of them in Italian.

-She is very possessive when she's not drunk, afraid to lose you, like how she lose her mother, it's scary when she speak to you in serious tone.

-hugging you while looking at the person that hit on you was her ways of showing "their mine".

𝑴𝒊𝒂:

-She's a psychopath don't be surprised

-24/7 whould stalk you

-becoming her lover was surprising enough so was her habits

-One student thought it was fun to dare their classmate to kiss you in cheeks randomly for 50 bucks, guess what? The poor student almost have her face rip off by Mia when she found out about this, luckily the other sororities was there to stop this woman from making a crime.

-The dared student was not forgiven also, Mia have to be in dorm suspension for 10 weeks because she send that student begging for their life Infront of the council's door

-Nothing can stop this woman from randomly breaking in to you're dorm, blocking? No help, girl dead ass pull up a chainsaw once to open you're room because you blocked it

-She's into knife play(maybeee), you're punishment will result of few cuts, whould often bite you're ear as she whisper some of the most unholy shit in you're ear reminding you why and how did you become lovers with this woman... Oh wait you remember.

-This lady kidnaped you before, blackmailing you also, be her lover or else, you're life was on the line that time

-talk about possessiveness, she have her name carved in you're back, it was made weeks ago, a punishment for escaping, reminding yourself never do that again.

My thoughts turn to something.. I wonder if I should officially make some yandere fics for them.. Hmm..

Angie and Mia was fun to write I know their both crazy to the core.

[boygiwrites]

Harley D. Dixon 2

An amazing edit inspired by this story! (Cred to Cora_Line99) Harley D. Dixon's Pinterest Board! Harley D. Dixon's Playlist!

📖Chapter List.

Author's Note. Get ready for the first major change in the canon story-line hehe

Please enjoy reading! :)

"You want me to sing tonight, chicken?"

It's way past my bed-time. The sky looks like a giant film of blue cellophane above us, with millions of little white holes poked through. I pick out the shiniest one, 'cause that one's my Momma. Then I realise I gotta pick one out for Uncle Merle, now, too, so I pick the one right next to Momma's and wish him goodnight in my head.

After my Dad dragged all our stuff further into the woods, because we shouldn't sleep next to people we don't trust, we curled up in his camping chair and we haven't moved since. I'm wrapped up in a grubby gray blanket that I think used to be white, 'cause it's all we got, and I'm wearing two pairs of socks plus my Dad's jacket but it's still cold. I feel like a baby joey in a Momma kangaroo's pouch. Through the trees, I can see the main camp's fires all glittering like tiny orange fireflies and I can hear 'em all laughing. I think they're celebrating. Me and my Dad — We're mourning.

Tomorrow, they're heading back to the city to look for my Uncle Merle, even though we all know he's dead already. He's dead and he's gone and he ain't never coming back, so why does my Daddy wanna go get killed, too? Don't he know I need him?

"I don't wanna go to sleep."

"Well," He reminds me, "Sometimes it don't matter what little girls want. I'm sayin' it's time to sleep, so it's time to sleep."

If he wanted to talk about it, I'd tell him that I don't wanna go to sleep because it means that when I wake up, it'll be the day my Daddy either dies in the city or he doesn't, and then I'll be all alone forever. I don't wanna pick a star out for my Dad. But I don't tell him any of this.

"Now, you want me to sing, or not?" He asks me again.

"I said," And half-way through I'm huffing this out, I know I've made a mistake, but I keep goin', anyway, because at least if I make him super angry, he might wanna talk. Unlike Officer Rick, my Dad is easy to make angry. "I don't wanna go to sleep."

I feel his stomach fill with air underneath me. "Scuse me?"

I twist to face him. Half his face is glowing from the fire, and the other half is glowing just from how mad he is.

"I... don't... wanna," I spell it out real slow. That's what people do when someone's not listenin' properly. "Go... to... sleep."

I hear main camp laughing again. For just a second, I wish I was over there, instead.

I look my Dad in the eye. It's really hard.

"You lookin' for a spanking, Harley Dixon?"

"No," My voice wobbles.

"'Cause you keep back-chattin' me, that's where you're headed."

"But—"

"What I just say?"

I snap my mouth shut like a kettle lid. Does he even have the words in him? Do I gotta beat on his chest 'till they come flying out? Do I gotta kick and yell and scream 'till he can't hold 'em in anymore? What do I gotta do to make him talk? How am I meant to like it over here, in this lonely camp with no Momma and no Uncle and maybe after tomorrow, no Dad, neither?

"Quit that look, Harley Dixon. I'm warnin' you."

"No."

"You really gonna make me repeat myself?"

I snap.

"Maybe I'on care!" I shout. We're both shocked. Then, he's about to lay me over his knee and whoop me 'till I'm black and blue, but I don't stop for nothin'. "Maybe I'on give a crap! I said I don't wanna go to sleep, so why you makin' me? I don't wanna! Uncle Merle's dead! He's dead and you don't even care!"

"How can you say tha—"

"You don't care because you're goin' back to the city tomorrow and you're gonna die, and I'm gonna be alone again, and you don't even care! Uncle Merle is dead! Just like Momma, he's dead!"

"We don't know that, Harley."

"Yeah, we do! Rick killed 'im, and now he's dead."

"That ain't true. Harley, you listen—"

He grabs my arms, but I smack him away. He gets angrier.

He points a finger in my face. "Do not fuckin' hit me, girl."

"I'on care."

Now he really grabs me, and it's so tight I can't smack him at all, or wriggle, or even look away. I see two miniature versions of our campfire in his eyes, burning away. It's a familiar look. I start to cry. I wish I wasn't here. I wanna be in main camp, where they're laughing.

"You stop this bullshit right now, Harley." He says, low. "I don't know what's gotten into you, but if it don't stop right this second, you're gonna regret it. You understand? Don't you ever hit me again. I'm leavin' tomorrow, and that's final."

"But why?"

"'Cause I'm choosin' to believe in yer Uncle Merle. You heard what all them said. There's a chance he ain't dead, and that's a chance I'm gonna take, because I'm a Dixon. Dixons look out for each other." He gives me a little shake. "If it were either one of us in that city, he'd be raisin' Hell on his way there already. Now, I don't wanna hear another word outcher mouth 'bout this. No more tears, neither. Got it?"

It's still not good enough. I want more.

"You wouldn't go back for Momma." I mutter, before I even realise that's what I've chosen to say. Somehow, that's the worst thing I've told my Dad all night, and I didn't even need to shout it. We stare at each other for a bit. "You wouldn't go back for her. You killed her."

I promised I'd never bring it up again, but there it is. I said it.

I think I might throw up again.

Just like that, our argument is over. He doesn't say anything, and then I don't say anything, either, and the not-saying-anything keeps going until we're back to sitting against each other in silence. The moon is high in the trees, now. One by one, the orange blips in the distance die. The chatter gets quieter and quieter until it's gone, and then me and my Dad are truly alone. He holds me tight, but it doesn't feel nice like it did before. It just feels like we're back to square one, because we are, and everything is a little to the left. Like when you get a pebble in the corner of your shoe, and you gotta walk a little funny to pretend it's not there, but it is, and you can feel it, and you hate it.

"You want me to sing for you, chicken?"

This time, I just say yes.

I watch the cube van drive into the distance until it's a white speck.

Dale stands next to me, even after everyone else has shuffled back to camp. "You've probably heard this from ten other people by now," Dale says, holding onto the strap of his heavy sniper rifle, "But your Dad? Well, he's going to be just fine. Toughest man in camp, I'd say."

My Dad, he's tough as nails, and he could shoot a walnut off a fencepost from a mile away, but he's also just a man. He's just skin and bones and blood like everyone else, like me, like deer and squirrels, and a bite from a dead person will kill him just the same. I don't say this to Dale.

He doesn't seem to mind. "Do you remember your first day here?"

A strange thing to ask. 'Course I remember. "What about it?"

"Things were a little more desperate, back then. We'd just ran out of our last tin of beans. People were hungry. I remember your Dad spent the whole morning telling people to leave him alone, because everybody was just begging him to go hunting. I think I did, too." Dale laughs. "One by one, he shot them all down. We were all so sure we'd have to start rationing. Then, the next morning, I go to wash my face behind the RV, and what do I see? Your Dad, dinged up and covered in sweat, dragging this... just... huge, simply huge... deer, into camp. I was gobsmacked. I remember thinking, 'who on Earth could have possibly convinced this stubborn man to go hunting'? Then, later in the day, I see him handing you a bowl of fried deer meat, happy as a clam, and that's when I knew he did it all for you. Tooth and nail, he made sure you were fed. And that's how I know he's coming back."

I think about all the times my Dad's done somethin' like that for me, like with Ronnie, and I feel a little better. My Momma once said my Dad would crawl back out of Hell on hot coals for me, and that I should never forget that. I feel bad for forgetting.

"I didn't tell him I love him, before he left." I admit to Dale. "I was real mean to him last night. I wish I told him."

"That's okay," Dale bumps my shoulder, and when I look up, there's a smile in his white beard. He winks. "I think he knows. Dads always know."

Something about Dale's cheeky attitude makes me giggle. I think I believe him.

"Now, lucky for us, we're certainly not short on food around here anymore. So, how about we go get you some breakfast?"

The day goes by like it always does, 'cause it don't know any better.

I can see Amy and Andrea fishing from the bank of the lake. Their boat looks like a little grain of salt in the middle of a giant green coin.

I'm up to my knees in the water. I'm trying to catch frogs. I'm missing. Shane and Carl are here, too, because even though we ate a whole sleeve of cheese and onion crackers for breakfast, Officer Shane says frog legs are gonna be all the rave, soon, when the peaches and jerky run out. We told him that's super gross, but he just smacked his lips and told us to grab our hats. We gotta do things like this, now. Things like sharing one tube of toothpaste, and only using two squares of toilet paper when you gotta go, and the adults gotta try and make it sound fun. 

I hear Carl somewhere down the rocks, going awww and man 'cause he keeps missing, too. All I know 'bout Carl is he can't spell 'adventure'.

"Hey, man, it happens. How you doin' over there, Harley?" Officer Shane asks me. "You managed to catch any of the little suckers yet?"

"No, not yet." I say. "But I can see 'em."

When we first got down here, Shane asked us kids to provide a little muscle for him. Shane's got plenty of muscle, already. He was just kiddin'. He does that a lot, and his laugh is real loud. He also gives high fives that knock you on your butt, and he's got a heavy walk and a dog tag. I think he must have taught little league, or somethin', before, 'cause he talks like a teacher. All fun and games, but also lots of rules. Like how if you say a bad word, he flicks you on the ear and tells you to mind your language.

I'm still not used to any of these people talking to me. I think they're just glad I ain't biting and hitting on them, anymore.

"How many's in there?" Shane wades over to me.

The only reason I trust Shane is because he's an adult, and adults can be trusted.

I count the frogs. "Um... Three."

"Three? Hm, talk about a gold mine, huh?" He laughs and, yep, it's real loud. "Let's see if I can't help you out here."

He sets our bucket down, which has two wet frogs slipping around inside it.

He rubs his hands together. "C'mon, girl. Let's catch us some frog legs."

He says they eat frog legs in France. I never knew that before today. French people are weirdos.

"You gotta get 'em quick, 'cause they're quicker." I warn Shane. It's something my Dad says 'bout squirrels and possums, so I say it now, too.

"Sure are." Shane agrees. "How 'bout I scare 'em out, and you try grabbin' one?"

"With my hands?"

"What? You plannin' on using your feet?" Shane grins, and he splashes me. I giggle. "C'mon. Get ready."

Officer Shane rolls up his blue sleeves. I take three long steps backward and squat a little, like I'm playin' basketball or somethin', and then Shane grabs the metal bucket and clangs it against the rocks, and all three of the fat froggies come bursting out into the water like wind-up toys. I almost panic — almost — but that's what idiots do, so I steel myself, which means I'm not an idiot. I lunge at the closest frog and wrap my hands around the green blob it makes under the ripples.

When I pull my hands out, I realise I've caught it. It's real wriggly and its skin is cold.

I jump a little, smiling wide. "Look, Shane! I got one!"

"Way to go, Harley!" Shane says, and if I pretend hard enough, it sounds like my Dad's accent praising me instead. "Look at you!"

I drop the frog in the bucket. I hear cheering, and when I look out, I see it's Amy and Andrea. They're clapping. I guess they were watching. Carl comes hopping over, too, and tells me I did a good job. I know he's a bastard cop, and I know his friend murdered my Uncle, but maybe Shane ain't so bad. He makes me miss my teachers. Maybe this group ain't so bad. Maybe, maybe, maybe.

We call it a day after that, and we squeeze out all the water in our clothes on the gravel shore.

"C'mon, y'all," Shane says, "Time to haul butt back to camp."

What he really means to say is ass.

The sky goes from blue to purple, and soon, it'll be black.

We're gonna have a feast tonight. A fish feast.

Dale, who's sitting up on the RV, because he's like a barnacle on a boat, reads us a poetry book while we scrape scales off of fish with plastic spoons. After the book runs out, we pop cassettes in the radio. It's nothin' like what my Dad listens to. It's too nice.

I try really hard not to think about my stomach. It hurts real bad, which is what happens when you're nervous. I realise, a little guiltily, that I almost haven't thought about my Daddy or my Uncle Merle all day, until just now. I say sorry to them in my head, because I didn't do it on purpose, I promise. I was just focused on other things, like doing dishes, and getting my hair brushed by Lori, and strippin' fish skin. It was easy, during the day. But it's gettin' late, now, and every minute that goes by, I'm closer to being the only kid in camp with nobody to tuck me into bed.

I'm standing on a crate, which means I'm almost as tall as all the ladies. Makes me feel a little better. All women remind me of my Momma.

Maybe if I ask, Lori can tuck me in tonight.

"Hey, Harley, you're doin' real good over there." Jacqui tells me. The sun's on her shoulder. "Doin' better than me, at least."

I mumble a thank you, because it's good manners. I done dressed plenty of fish before. It's easy. Like peelin' bananas.

"Our Dad used to take us girls fishing all the time." Andrea tells us. "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, you name it. We were out on the water."

"Sounds fun," Lori says. "I always wanted to go fishing with Rick and Carl, but it never happened. We were indoor people."

Jacqui laughs. "Not anymore, you're not."

Lori makes a face. "You don't gotta tell me twice."

"What about you, Harley?" Asks Amy. "Your Dad ever take you fishing?"

There it is again; my stomach climbing up the back of my throat like a balloon. "Uh," I mumble. "Yeah. A lot."

Carol asks me, "You like it? Being on the water?"

"It's okay if you don't." Amy scrunches up her nose, smiling. "I was never that into it. Motion sickness 'n all."

I'm about to say no, I didn't like it, but something stops me. It's true, I never liked stabbing the alive worms on the hook, or gettin' sunscreen smeared all over my face, or carrying all them heavy buckets full of crayfish and bluegills back to the truck, but that doesn't matter. I was with my Dad. And I liked that. So, "I liked it," I say. "We went every weekend, in Dad's boat. It was sorta old, but he liked it a whole lot. He let me name it."

Lori smiles. Lori loves when people tell nice stories. "What'd you choose?"

"I named it after our old dog." I tell her. Hey, I'm smiling. "His name was Tank. So, Dad's boat was, 'The Tank'."

Lori pouts. She loves animals, too. "Aw. That's nice. We had a dog."

"What was his name?"

"Fido," She scoffs. "You can thank Carl for that one."

"I can't imagine Daryl lettin' anybody tell him what to do," Amy chuckles. "He's always so grouchy."

Dale must be eavesdropping, because he leans over his fold-out chair and calls down to us, "Now, now, remember that time with the deer?"

The story he told me this morning, to make me feel better.

All at once, the women start giggling together, and nodding, yes, they do remember that time with the deer. I catch it, like a stomach bug, and I start giggling, too, because I guess it is kinda funny. My Dad, with his squinty eyes and angry mouth and big, scarred fists, doin' whatever I tell him to. I never saw it like that, because it's always the other way 'round. For the first time today, I'm thinking of my Dad, and it doesn't hurt, not one bit.

"Like a gaggle of geese over there," Shane shakes his head from the fire. He's laughin', too. Bunch of eavesdroppers, these people. "Get back to work!"

"Yes, sir!" Andrea salutes, rolling her eyes.

We can't stop giggling.

The fish fry is, basically, a family barbeque.

My dinner is hot, and greasy, and it's even got yellow rice and onions in it, like takeaway. Takeaway is always good. Around the fire, all I see are happy faces and all I hear are jokes, and gasps, and laughter. They're talking about college, and how Lori used to wear the ugliest skirts, and how, yes, Shane can confirm, he was there to see it and, no, it wasn't pretty. When I look through the trees, I imagine me and my Daddy's sad little camp on the other side, abandoned. I was right. It is better over here. I hope he would think so, too.

"W— Hey! They were in style, back then!" Lori holds her fork up, like a pointing finger. "Everyone was wearin' them!"

"Oh, I remember." Shane shakes his head. "N— No, listen, I remember, alright! So short it was like a damn belt!"

Amy slides off her tennis shoe and launches it at Shane's legs. "You can't argue with fashion, Shane!"

He laughs. "Oh, that's what that was? Fashion?"

"Hey, I got some pretty nasty pictures of you with that damn perm on your head, so you might wanna quit while you're ahead." Lori sasses.

We all picture Shane with a mop of curly poodle hair, prolly posing like He-Man, and we all roar with laughter again.

Up until the very last grain of rice gets eaten, we talk about everything and anything, because stories are all we got to give each other anymore, Dale says. Dale talks about how he planned to take a trip around the state with his wife, in their RV, but she passed away before it could happen. So, when the world ended, he was in a gas station, buying ice creams and lookin' at maps, 'cause he was doin' the trip on his own. He says he's glad that all the small decisions he's made in life has led him to this quarry, with these people. Everybody calls him a sap, but he gets a side-hug from Jacqui. He smiles over the fire at me. Andrea and Amy talk more about their Dad.

I talk about the tyre swing I used to have, in my yard. Shange suggests building one here, too.

Jim talks a little about his old job as a mechanic. Morales talks about how much he misses his recliner.

"Aw, man, I'm telling you," He groans, like he's in a deep, deep pain. "It was remote-controlled, and it had blue-tooth, and everything."

Shane slaps him on the back. "Too bad the world ended; Had to get off your fat ass!"

More and more warm, silly laughter.

It's around us kid's bed-time when Dale checks his watch.

The other kids all complain straight away, but we get dragged away, anyway. I can hear my Daddy's voice in my head, telling me sometimes it don't matter what little girls want. Lori and Carol take us around the back of Shane's Jeep, where all the bathroom stuff gets kept, like the gallon jugs of water, the towels, and stuff Glenn brings back from runs. We brush our teeth, and splash our hair with water, and use baby wipes on our armpits.

I can see the tippy-tops of the city's tallest buildings from here, like skinny black popsicle sticks in the smog. I keep lookin' back, for my Dad.

I'm lookin' right now. Everyone else is trying to find Sophia's hairbrush in one of the bags, but I'm not helping. I can't look away.

There's a figure, stumbling up the road.

At first, I think it's my Dad, somehow. When you're expecting somethin' so much and for so long, and with all your heart, it's the first thing you think of. Even if it makes no sense. If they were really back, they'd all be together; Glenn, T-Dog, Daddy, and Rick, because my Daddy would make them all stick together, 'cause he's smart like that. But the shadow's alone. And he's got a limp. Just a little one. He hop-shuffle-hop-shuffles closer to us. No, no it's not my Dad. There's no crossbow; no big boots, no backpack. The shoulders aren't wide enough. Actually, the shoulders aren't wide at all. They're droopy. Too droopy, like they're... like they're melting off the bone, like hot cheese melts off pizza.

I hear a gurgle through the night. That's when it all makes sense.

"Walkers!"

And one second after that, the fish feast goes to Hell.

Someone snatches my wrist. We go rushing back into camp, where there's people, and lights, and noise. And shouting. Lots and lots of shouting; so much shouting it's like being stuck inside a beehive. I see flashes of legs and t-shirts and hands pulling me around, toward the bonfire. The bonfire must be brighter than a lighthouse out here, in the dark. Suddenly, I'm noticing everything wrong with the fish fry. The smells, the noise. I'm remembering my Daddy's rules, 'bout how loud is dangerous and dangerous is stupid and oh God — I can hear Amy shrieking like a piglet, near the RV. I hear shotguns pumping and bullets exploding and sloppy plops of skin falling of the dead people afterwards. I'm screaming.

The bag — The emergency bag, the one in our tent. I should grab it, right? That's what I'm supposed to do, right? So we can live?

"Lori!" Shane's hollering. "Carl! Harley! Where are you?"

"We're over here!" Lori cries.

"Start moving!"

Everywhere, everywhere, legs, legs, legs, all rotten and slimy and dead. Then, a gap, filled with darkness. The tent is out there. The bag.

I can make it. I know I can.

"Harley!"

That's Lori, screaming like she's never screamed before, because I just broke away from her, and I can feel something hot sliding down my arm, and it must be blood, 'cause she must have ripped my arm open with her short razor nails. I run straight for the gap in the wall of dead people, and I throw myself past them, like they're bowling pins and I'm the ball, and then I'm on the other side, in the dark, dark woods, running, running, running, all by myself. I remember the path to our camp. Big rock, little tree, old fence. It's all there, it's just covered in night.

I hear Shane yelling for me, and Morales, too, and more screaming, more dying.

A dead man slams into me. We go tumbling into the branches and the leaves, and then down a little hill, and then into a ditch. I smack his growling face away from mine, and I kick his stomach, and I wriggle away. The dirt is slipping away from underneath me, like dust, but the roots are easy to climb so I climb those, and the dead man follows me out. He's swiping at my ankles, scampering for my legs, slobbering on his lips.

His nails catch my arm.

I see the tent.

I'm running again, but only for a second. It's my pants. They're stuck. The dead man's grabbing onto them. I kick his fingers off.

"Get away," I grunt.

The pebbly ground barks under my shoes when I tear off again, and it only takes a couple heartbeats for me to reach my Dad's camping chair, and then the black fire pit, and then the truck, and then the tent. I rip open the zipper and fall inside. The bag, the bag, the bag. I scramble for my Dad's sleeping cot, and drop to my knees, and pat around all the spare shirts and pants and socks and blankets he's got stuffed under here, praying, please God, it's gotta be here, like he says it is. My fingers hit something soft, then something hard. A buckle. I grab. I pull.

It's the bag. It's the bag, with the compass and the rope and the matches. I did it.

A branch cracks. I look over my shoul—

The dead man crashes on top of me, all two hundred pounds, through the tent lining. He squirms against me like a finger in a glove.

I scuttle backward as fast I can, under the cot. The dead man flops and turns and twists until he finds the tent opening, and he slithers inside, 'cause he's a hungry animal and I'm his food. An electric lamp clicks on underneath my foot. The dead man's shadow gets projected onto all four of the tent walls; big, like the bogeyman. I hug the bag like a teddy bear and then that's it, and there's nowhere else to go. His fingers reach for me, and they look like big, black, dead spiders, all curled up. I see his face, now. It's shredded. It's beaten.

It's Sophia's Dad.

Something clamps around my shoe, and it's his teeth. A whole row of thick, white teeth. A bite.

I squeeze my eyes closed and hope my shoe's thick enough to keep me safe. There's nothin' else I can do.

Then, a great, big bang.

Then, hot, slippery puddles of blood, and little bits of neck and skin and jaw, splattered across my face. He slumps. Is it over? It's over? His head's cracked open like an egg, and his brains are leaking out like yolk. There's a bullet hole between my two feet. That means — That means someone shot his shadow, through the tent. Only someone with a very good shot could have made that, without killing me at the same time. I claw my way out from under all the blankets, and the body, and the cot. I can hear voices shouting, Oh Fuck, Oh God, and, Where are you, baby, and, If you hit my daughter, I will fucking end you.

The electric lamp flutters off.

The tent is ripped open. 

I look up. I'm blinded by big, white circles of flashlight light. Someone gasps.

My chin crumples 'cause I'm crying, like a little baby.

Rick's standin' there, Sherriff's hat on, revolver smoking. Shane's there, too, wild-eyed, and very, very sweaty, with a shotgun. There's Glenn, panting. They look at the blood on the blankets, and the blood on my face, and their dead friend on the floor, with half a head. Then, they see the scratches on my arm, and for some reason, some of them look like they're about to throw up all over themselves. But the person in front, the person that got here first, that's my Dad. It's my Dad, and he's alive. He doesn't even stop to look, like the others. He doesn't care.

"Harley," He chokes, like he's been punched, and he drops to his knees in front of me. He presses me into his chest. He's alive. He's alive. 

I'm alive.

"Daddy," I cough-sob, 'cause I can't help it.

I only ever call him Daddy instead of Dad in my head, or when I'm really, really upset.

He must notice, 'cause the hug gets tighter; safer. "Baby, I'm here. You're alright. You're alright. S'alright, now."

I bury my face in his sweaty, stinky, dirt-smeared neck, and I never wanna come back out. I sob and I sob and I sob, and I sob some more. He pets my hair and shushes me, like how he does when I get nightmares. We rock back and forth. I sob, sob, sob.

Someone says my Dad's name real weird, like they're boutta keel over, and only then I remember me and my Dad aren't the only two people in the world. Footsteps crinkle on the tent canvas. Someone kneels next to me. It's Rick. He takes off his hat and sucks in a breath, glances at the others — He steels himself — and then he gently grabs my green sleeve, and I wriggle into my Dad, who's lettin' him do this, and he slides it up my arm. Fresh claw marks, and blood, pouring down my skin. We stare at my arm for a long time. They glance at Sophia's Dad. Why are we staring at my arm?

I look at Rick. I look at Glenn; at Shane. I look at my Dad. He's gone white as a ghost.

"Harley, what is that?" He whispers to me.

I look back at my arm. It's just some stupid scratches. I wipe 'em away, 'cause I want 'em gone. "It's nothin'."

"Harley," He says again, this time with a very clear, very angry, no-nonsense voice. "You look me in the eye. What is that?"

Something is very, very wrong.

Glenn has to walk away.

"Wh—?" I shake my head, sniffing. Why do I feel like I'm in trouble? I didn't do nothin' wrong. "It's nothin'. Lori, she scratched me."

"It was Lori?" Rick raises his eyebrows, like it's very, very important that I'm not lying right now.

I'm not lying. Rick, he's a liar, but not me.

"Uh-huh." I nod hard, so they believe me. "It was Lori. H— He got me, too, I think, but it don't hurt. I promise. He ain't do it too hard."

I didn't say the right thing.

They're all looking at each other. They're speaking without talking, and I don't like it.

"Daddy, what's goin' on?" I'm mumbling now, 'cause I only want my Daddy to hear me, 'cause I'm scared. I'm really scared. I don't know what I did wrong, and I don't know what they're thinking about, but I'm sorry, and I'll never do it again. I was so busy worrying about the teeth in my shoe that I wasn't thinking about anything else. I think I should've been, though, and I'm sorry I wasn't. I'm sorry. All I know is that I'm sorry. I don't know why, but I'm sorry. Daddy picks me up, even though he's told me over and over I'm too old for that, now. He's shuddering.

"We'll check Lori's nails." Rick tells him, nice and steady. His police-man voice. "If there's blood under them—"

"This bastard's got blood unn'er his nails!" Dad gives Sophia's Dad a hard kick in the head. I shriek. "The stupid fuck! It don't fuckin' matter!"

"It does matter. It does." Rick keeps saying. "We can't make any conclusions. Not 'til then. We just can't."

"You wanna talk 'conclusions', officer? Let's talk 'conclusions'."

"Daryl, we'll figure this out."

"How the Hell did y'all even let this fuckin' happen?" Dad yells. "You're like a fuckin' bad luck charm, you people!"

"This is nobody's fault." Rick says, but he sounds like he knows he's lying.

I can hear people panicking far away, back at camp, in whispers. Glenn ran back there a few minutes ago.

"First my brother, now my—?" Dad cuts himself off. He's about to cry.

Nobody's got anything to say.

We listen to the sounds of leaves rustling and crickets chirping and the distant yelling and the breeze and my Daddy's big strong heartbeat, which is goin' buh-bump, buh-bump, buh-bump under my ear, real, real fast.

Shane steps forward, but it's all over already.

This is what it was like the night Tank got put down. I realise that I'm like Tank. Tank was dying. I'm a dying dog. The scratches on my arm, I get it now. They're from the dead man and they're from Lori at the exact same time, and until we know which it is, that means I'm dying. He scratched me — I remember, now. He got me. He did. I don't wanna be dying. I was alive just a second ago. I swear I was.

Unlike yesterday, Daddy doesn't bat Rick off when puts a hand on his shoulder. Something changed in the city today. I think we're all one team, now, even if my Daddy likes to bite and snap and blame. There's no more line between them and us. There's not two camps, anymore. Only one.

The stars are bright, tonight. I watch them twinkle over my Dad's head.

"If this happens," Daddy's voice cracks. "Every single one of you are gonna be real, real sorry."

Author's Note. Yep, you guessed it, Jim survives! And Harley is the one that gets attacked.

No more ominous hole-digging for you, Jim. Sorry.

Phew. This took a long time to write. I had to re-work almost every scene about four times, because some things just weren't working, and I had to delete some others. It all worked out in the end, though. Here we are with chapter two.

Please let me know what you think! :)

[thewertsearch]

Ask Comp 25/8

Aw, thank you! Sometimes I actually think I overdo it a little - that my dives are a little too deep. This is how I consume media IRL, though, so if nothing else, it's authentic.

The Battlefield is definitely growing. The spatial warping makes it hard to measure how much it's growing, so it could definitely be exponential, especially if we keep adding higher dimensions.

As for how Jack matches up against Bec - Jack is definitely smarter, but he's also a lot more vulnerable, since losing the Ring will render him powerless. He'd have to be incredibly careful in a fight, especially against someone just as fast as he is.

I still think Bec has the edge, but his victory is far from guaranteed. I totally understand why Jade wouldn't want to risk it.

Imagine what Eridan would have said to a 'lowly greenblood' like Jade.

Yeah, there's no way trolls have therapy.

I hate to say it, but the Alternian version of therapy is probably moirallegiance. You're supposed to rely on this one person to keep you emotionally stable - and if you're not outgoing or charismatic enough to find a moirail, you don't even have that.

Of course, this system has nothing in common with the relationship dynamics of any culture on Earth. We really dodged a bullet there!

Gamzee really leans into the 'court jester' aspect of being a bard. He doesn't take anything seriously, nor is he expected to do so - he's just off to the side, dancing.

Yeah, my prediction is that Vriska is going to use him.

If she can manipulate Tavros into trying to control Jack, she might actually be able to remove his Ring. I speculated that she might use some sort of cheat to gain an advantage in their fight, and I think we may have found it.

He casually controls Becsprite later on, so I don't think he needs their goals to align.

As for why Bec didn't try to save Jade - I think he knew instinctually that someone was going to make him save her, so he didn't need to do it manually. That's Alpha, baby!

I can't tell if I've reached the controversial part, to be honest. Was there discourse about whether Tavros had done anything wrong?

Personally, I think it's hard to argue that he didn't, but other characters have done much worse - and in much more ambiguous scenarios, too.

Lord English is coming, send help plz

Thank you! It's kind of funny actually - I know that Homestuck's irregular update schedule used to drive people mad, but I'm reading it at a similar pace, with similar irregularities, and it really has been a chill experience on my end.

Maybe it's because I'm not participating in the fandom the way live readers were, and therefore, I'm not subject to the weapons-grade hiatus brain that Cat has war stories about.

Poor Kanaya - she really knows how to pick 'em. Rose is definitely less stressful to crush on than Vriska, though.

I recently saw this quote for the first time in a while. Excited to learn which of the comic's several thousand plot points it's referencing.

@spyril4132 asked: i have seen this in my youtube recommendations and must now share [s] descend but with silvagunner's high quality nuclear rip - YouTube

Legitimately amazing, and perfectly timed.

For anyone doesn't know about Silvagunner, please take a dip down this rabbit hole.

I do wonder how she's getting physical details about the Sun. Isn't it, like, fully outside of conventional reality?

Maybe the Sun is physically real, despite being in an unreal location. Technically, that's also the case with sessions.

I do like the 'music player' metaphor from an earlier ask. You don't necessarily have to use discs - a cassette player is also a good choice, or maybe an older variety of music box.

If you want to stretch the symbolism a little, your Time Player could wield something really kooky, like an iPod Nano, MIDI keyboard, or analog radio.

(Sally the Time Player would wield Rhythm Heaven for the Nintendo DS.)

It's been years since I've watched Primer, actually. I remember enjoying it, but I don't recall enough to give a proper review. Rewatch time!

Yeah, the rules for Captcha codes are all over the place. This example implies that they hold the general idea of an object, without any 'corruption' - but when John's Ghost Dad poster was defaced, its code did change.

The implication, I guess, is that defacing a poster counts as changing its nature, but spilling oil on a pogo ride does not. It's weird.

It is odd that it's marketed as a beta. Sburb and Sgrub seem almost identical, the latter's bifurcated session notwithstanding.

The human session failed, yes - but it failed due to manipulation, sabotage, and a generous helping of terrible luck. If Gamzee prototyped one of his clown posters, Jack's regicide could just as easily have happened in Sgrub.

All that said - when it comes to software development, I'd trust Sollux over Grandpa any day. If one of those games is more stable, it's Sgrub.

Alright, that one's actually pretty great lmao

[brainyrot]

Just a few things my dad has said (to me) that I wanna share with you guys, feeling like some of you need 'em

- everyone is mad. Every single human is mad, some people are so mad that they create beautiful things. cars, videogames, stories, books, were all created by mad people who just had the thought of it and made it reality. Even art is made by crazy people, it's their way of showing their madness through beautiful canvas and a few lines, just like you do. We are a bunch of weirdos, so don't ever think bad of yourself for being weird or different because everybody is, most just hide their insanity or differences even if little, but you should never hide yours, not worth it, just enjoy life.

- the world's a mad place, sometimes you find the craziest of people that will end up being your friend, your girlfriend, your boyfriend, whatever the hell you want, sometimes you find people who just have their brain fused. Who just wanna annoy the shit out of people, some are even worse and end up hurting people. Watch out for the world out there, okay? Don't give up, always get up and show the world that you're not messing around. You wanna draw? Draw. You wanna make music? Make music. It doesn't matter how many people say it's useless or any of that shit, just convince yourself that it's possible, so it becomes possible.

- okay, so you're most likely neurodivergent. We just need some doctor tests to confirm it on paper, so what? We'll do the tests. But don't think it makes you any less smarter, any less likeable, creative or any less of a person for that. Being neurodivergent only means your brain works differently than others, not less than others. You're not dumb, you just work in a way most people don't understand, and that's okay. Any important people you know were neurodivergent, and they created a shit load of things that we still use and study today. Einstein for example. it doesn't matter what shit you got going on, doesn't matter, you're still the same anyway.

- you should stop being so anxious about everything, it's just a way to stress yourself out and get sick. Not worth it. Just live it easy, it's more relaxing and fun. Don't worry if you're gonna get late one time at school, don't worry if the train doesn't work or anything, don't worry. stuff happens, and most of the time it's not because of you. just relax, just stop caring about all that crap, you gotta just let it go and have fun regardless

- listen,nobody should tell you what to do, how to do, or anything. People shouldn't let you take stupid ass choices and make you have a job you don't like for the rest of your life. I let you choose to go to an art school because I know it's what you're passionate about. You wanna draw, and that's okay, you like doing that, not stopping you there. Even if you suddenly change, maybe you wanna, I don't know, do math or something, that's fine, we'll work with it. It's only about what you like to do. What you enjoy, not what others want. Who gives a shit if someone says you should be a medic because it'll get you success in life, they're wrong anyway. You'll get success in your own way anyway, you shouldn't waste your time in pleasing someone else if what you're doing is just annoying the shit out of you. Wanna go grab the garbage each morning at 6am? Do that. Wanna go and teach some kids stuff? Do that, who gives a shit, it's your life anyway. Just remember that you are your own first priority.

- just love whoever the hell you like, as long as you're happy. And safe.

[odinsblog]

OMG, white people get sO mad when you block them on tumblrdotcom. They be like, “YOU UNBLOCK ME AND DEBATE ME RIGHT THIS MOMENT SO I CAN TELL EVERYONE WHY I THINK YOU’RE WONG!”

Like, my dude, you dO know that you can go and make your own posts, right? You aren’t a “victim” bc you got blocked

Like, sometimes I don’t mind a good natured debate (so long as we’re not “debating” things like basic human rights), but I don’t owe anyone the discourse™ on this website. And if even if you’ve somehow made a good point, why on earth would I or anyone be enticed to not block someone who starts or ends their comments with snide personal insults? My blog is not a democracy, beyotch

SN: They’re unintentionally revealing their ingrained desire, where what they REALLY want is to control what certain people say and force others into using their preferred narrative. They aren’t really interested in dialogue, they just want the world to bend to their preferred narrative (hint: you can simply make an argument of your own and lay it out there, you don’t have to harass others on their posts and their little corner of the internet)

I love social media, but one bad thing about it is, it teaches many people to be smug sanctimonious assholes, instead of just actually trying to talk to other people like they’re human beings with differing opinions

Anyway, it never ceases to amaze me at how privileged some people are, like they’ve never been told to stfu before

When you tell ‘em, they be shook like 😮 🫢 🫨

LOL, well they’re in luck because I am just the Black man who will tell them precisely what they’ve been needing to hear: despite what your parents may have told you all your life, you are not a ✨special boy✨so please have a tall glass of blocked + STFU

[lumiereandcogsworth]

favourite belle headcanon(s)?

oohhh my beloved girl….

these got long so i’m putting them under the cut 😁

one i think about all the time is how she kind of becomes a forever student. and by that i mean, once she becomes ✨royalty✨ she gets in contact with the headmaster and other professors at the university of paris and she just like. always studies there. i think her & adam live in paris sometimes too so she gets to be in classes occasionally. but she just CRAVES knowledge and wants to learn EVERYTHING. by the time she’s older she probably has like every possible degree you could get there. like literally i think she’s like a pokémon trainer; gotta collect ‘em all!!!!

and of course she’s always working on the education system as queen, trying very hard to get more schools built, create laws that mandate it for all children - INCLUDING GIRLS!!!! and she’s just. soooo involved in education. she loves studying and learning and she wants to make sure no one has to grow up deprived of it the way she was. (because not everyone has a cool papa who taught them as much as he could and encouraged them to read so much !!) so yeah just. all things education✨ i have a wip i need to revisit that’s set when adam & belle are first married and she’s back from spending time with her tutor and she starts rambling about all the things she’s learned and adam’s listening with heart eyes and then she stops and apologizes for rambling and he’s like no i love it tell me more !! and it kinda makes her choke up because no one’s ever loved her for that amazing mind of hers….🤧

another one i really love is that i think she’s very clingy/snuggly in bed. and i don’t think she realized how much she loved being held when she slept until adam held her and she felt so SAFE. i think because she’s always been so independent, always had to fend for herself, she just didn’t realize how much she actually liked having someone to protect her — even if there isn’t any actual danger while they sleep. just knowing he’s holding her, it kind of helps her to let her guard down. which she needs to do just as much as adam does!

when she and adam travel (which is very often) she keeps diaries of every place they go. it started with their honeymoon, when adam gifted her, on their wedding day, a journal to take note of their adventures. and she loves it so much that she keeps it up! she has DECADES worth of journals in the shelves of her study back home, by the time she’s older. she loves to make notes about the food and the people and the whether and the flora & fauna and all of it!!! she loves exploring SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!! her and adam usually have to do some kind of Royal Thing™️ while they’re anywhere, but they also take time to go off the beaten path and explore and meet local people and just dive in wherever they are. and i like to think that, in their universe, the Travel Diaries of Queen Belle remain very well-preserved throughout time, and are some of the coolest artifacts in french history 🤌

she love baking and cooking !!!!!! she doesn’t get to do it very often since being the queen and having a million other responsibilities, but it was always one of her favorite things to do both for and with her father. and she LOVES the giant ass castle kitchen, i just know she goes crazy in there at least once a week. it’s the most fun when she’s pregnant and having wild cravings. she makes insane concoctions that literally do not taste good but she loves them. i have another random little unposted scene of adam finding her in the kitchen, acting like a mad scientist cooking three different things at once, and adam gets suspicious and asks if she’s pregnant again lmao. she laughs and says she isn’t, she just happened to be reading a cook book recently gifted to her and she couldn’t decide which to try first so she’s making 3 at once!!!!!!!! (but not combined. THAT would definitely be the indicator of another little one)

speaking of her babies!!!!!!!! gosh what can i say about my mama belle headcanons? one big and important one that i have is that she elects to nurse her own babies. which, as you can imagine, is super uncommon for a QUEEN to do. i elaborate on it in This Fic, but essentially she just couldn’t bring herself to adhere to the tradition of a wet nurse. i think because she wanted to find a way to be closer to the mother she lost as an infant, she wanted to do everything her mother did for her before she died. i think her pregnancies, ESPECIALLY her first, were when she thought about her mother the most. because… that was the most time they spent together 🫠 her mother died when belle was only three months old!!!! and she knew, of course, that her mother nursed her. i just think she felt this deep need to honor her & connect to her this way. and adam was originally advocating for a wet nurse, purely thinking about time efficiency, how busy belle is and how much work time she’d have to give up to do this, but after hearing her lament her mother and cry that she couldn’t be here to help show her how to be a mama… he understood. he knows how desperate one can be to connect to a lost mama :( so he supports his queen and they never hire a permanent wet nurse for their children! (there was a temporary one for a FEW times they HAD to go on small trips when they had a baby and they just couldn’t take her or him, but it was only under that kind of urgent/dire circumstance.)

i think belle is an absolutely iconic and very involved queen, but early on i think she struggles with it a lot. one of my favorite things to think about for her is how like… she was an outcast in the village, but she’s STILL an outcast in royal society. like i think she had this secret hope that this new position in life would be the answer; that she’d finally find her place. and she does eventually! but at first it’s rough. adam believes in her wholeheartedly and he LOVES that she is queen, but the rest of their court doesn’t fully take to her as easily. it’s strange enough that she came out of the woodwork, not from royalty, not even from a prominent noble family as far as they can tell! but As Queen she’s so much more involved than any of them could have anticipated. the older court and council members recall adam’s mother and grandmother, both very inactive queens (because they were very abused and disregarded by their husbands…) and therefore are confused by this sudden shift (especially because they KNEW of adam’s delinquency prior to meeting her, so they can’t fathom how he’s changed so much and is so supportive of her) and the younger court and council members just have no idea how to respond. they’re all willing to play the part and respect their queen, but then she’s… actually in meetings and actually sharing ideas and plans and making decisions and it’s like ???

and not even to mention, her ideas are very ahead of her time and forward thinking — and they don’t care for that shit at all! it’s just all very strange. and french court people are gossiping little pricks and so people talk about her a lot, and she feels just as isolated and different as she did in the village. she struggles a lot with it early on. and adam does everything he can to support her and comfort her and believe in her. but he also takes a lot of the blame for how she’s treated, because he feels like it’s his fault for bringing her into this life. even though she obviously chose all of this willingly. so, it’s just TOUGH. but time does carry on, and eventually belle does have the respect of her court, at least the vast majority of it. she does find her place in the end, it just doesn’t happen as swiftly as she had hoped.

gosh, okay, one last note that i will make much lighter: she loves loves loves loves loves LOVES to read to her children. which is obvious, i know, but oh my gosh. she just loves it. she loves when adam reads to them too, but i think something fills her heart so completely when she’s sitting with them gathered on the floor, or she’s in bed and they’re snuggled around her, she’s just whisking them away to all these adventures. reading was always her escape, and i think she likes that, for them, it’s just a way to expand their dreams. she loves teaching them so much, she loves watching their little minds expand with curiosity and creativity. she never really expected to become a mother, because she wasn’t going to let herself settle in that village, so now that she IS one, i think she just loves giving them the whole world. she loves listening to them read, too. she loves listening to them talk and sing and play and laugh. she loves being a mama so much more than she ever even considered. i think because she always attached that kind of thought to being in a loveless marriage in the village she’d be stuck in forever. but there’s so much love between her and adam, it always multiples with each of their three little babies. and she didn’t have to give herself up for any of it. she gets to be a brilliant queen; a student, a teacher, a leader, while still being the best wife and mama (and daughter!!) to the ones she loves the most. i just love writing her happily ever after so much. i think she was really beginning to lose hope in that village, and i love how it all changed, and that adventure in the great wide somewhere is always right at her finger tips :”)

[writergirl3]

A Message For Insecure 4 Townies, From 4 Town...

Okay, so, I wanted to try something different here. I was inspired by none other than the amazing @4townlove and their letter-style head canons. I want to give them full credit for the inspiration of this, and please go and read their work (although I'm sure you already have).

Also, you can change the dialogue at the beginning, if you want. I just wanted to keep it general so that the messages made more sense.

Also, I gave up on adding an image for each member because I've basically run out, lol.

So, this one's for any 4 Townies who are feeling insecure. I've been there a lot, and if you have too, I hope you like this ⭐️🧡

---

(B/M/N): Band Member's Name

B/M/N: "Y/N…what’s wrong?"

You: "Nothing…I just feel ugly and annoying and…not good enough."

Robaire;

“Mon amour, will you hear me out for a second?

It’s normal to feel insecure. There’s something strange about the human brain; it doesn’t seem to register all the wonderful things that others see in us. Sometimes I feel unsure of myself, and you always remind me of positive things, right?

Well, ma belle rose, now it’s my turn. I could list hundreds of reasons why you certainly aren’t ‘ugly’, ‘annoying’ or ‘not good enough’. But, instead, I want to tell you what I see.

Every day spent with you leaves me wanting for nothing, because when I’m with you, I have everything I’ve ever wanted. Your smile can brighten even the cloudiest of skies. When you reach for my hand, I feel like it was crafted to fit in mine. You don’t even need to do anything to make my life better, that’s how special you are.

I know it might take some time for you to come round and believe me. And if you’re still having a hard time seeing yourself as I do, I’ll reassure you until you do, ma cherie.”

Jesse;

“Y/N, I know it’s hard, but you mustn’t say those things about yourself, okay? Not just because they’re far from true, but because it’s not good for you. For your soul, your confidence, your heart. You’re so kind to everyone around you, and it’s important to spare a little bit of that for yourself.

Y’know, it’s easy to believe that no one else feels insecure or doubtful of themselves, but that, also, isn’t true. When I joined 4 Town, I worried and worried about being older than the other guys. I didn’t want to feel like a spare part, like I was making up the numbers. 

But you know what? They helped me see how being different made us stronger as a group. Sure, they poke fun a little at me sometimes, but it’s all good. I know they don’t mean it, because they helped me see how my differences can shine in their own light.

I hope you see what I’m saying here. None of the things you’ve said about yourself are true. Any little insecurities that you have actually make you all the more special. And I love you for them.”

Aaron T;

“WHAT?!?!

Okay, okay, I’m sorry! I’m sorry for shouting, baby, I’m not mad at you. Not one bit! I just…I just don’t understand?

What do I mean, you ask? Well, just that. I don’t see how someone so perfect could see themselves as the opposite. Hell, you’re too perfect sometimes- that’s the only thing I could accuse you of.

What is it that you don’t like? That laugh that I could listen to on loop? Your heaven-sent smile? And your eyes? Man, I always find myself looking at them.

And all this about being annoying and not good enough? Just look around you. You have so many people in your life who love and respect you, and you know I’m one of ‘em. 

And so what if some people in life think you’re not ‘good enough’? What is good enough? You’re so much more than that to me. You’re perfect, and that will never change.”

Aaron Z;

“Sweetheart…I…just, please listen to me for a sec, okay?

I don’t know what or who made you question yourself, your worth. If it’s me, I’ll never forgive myself for that, because you make my world better just by being in it. In fact, you are my world.

Was it someone else? One of the boys? No? Okay, I see. You’ve got into your own head a little. That’s okay, it happens to me too sometimes. But let me say just one thing.

You know I’m not great with…words, and stuff, so I’ll keep this simple. I love you. In fact, I’m in love with you. All those little things that you see as ‘bad’ are anything but. They’re what made me fall for you in the first place, and I’ve still yet to land.

You know what? I’m gonna write you a list of everything I love about you, okay? Kinda like a letter. But until I’ve finished it, just know that I never want you to change. Maybe I’ve not done a good enough job at showing you that, but I mean it. I love you so much.”

Tae Young;

“Dove, what are you saying? Those are such horrible words and could never reflect how I see you.

What do I see? Well, I see a wonderful person. A kind soul who is unique in their own right. You know what words I would use instead of the ones you chose? Passionate. Caring. Loyal. Gorgeous. Sweet.

There are so many others, but just being with you now is making me go sorta blank. Not because I can’t think of anything! It’s just, seeing your eyes all teary and those little red flushes on your cheeks; it makes me flustered and heartbroken at the same time.

Next time you feel like this, come straight to me, okay? I’ll hold you until you feel right, and find a way to help you see yourself with love. All those bad words you think about yourself? You can bet that I have a replacement for each and every one, love.”

---

Musing Meaninglessly Masterlist

[obae-me]

I randomly thought of this but now I can't get rid of it and I NEED TO TELL SOMEONE (and who better than youuuu who actually takes the time to read the long ass stuff I send <3) . The sassiest Mc who is sweet as sugar but also cold as ice spitting straight facts if her buttons are pushed. Like it would be soooo satisfying to shut the brothers up and put em in their place >.<

Mammon: Oi stupid huma-

Mc: Me? Stupid? Oh really now- That's rich coming from someone who would still be hanging from the ceiling if I hadn't come and saved their ass.

~

Diavolo: We can't thank you enough mc for making the exchange program such a success an-

Mc: Honestly I couldn't care less, I didn't even consent to any to this? You just plopped me here with 7 demons who have issues even therapy can't solve... if it wasn't for the free rent I would have ran away long ago.

~

Lucifer: You have to obey the rules I have set-

Mc: Why?

Lucifer: Because this is my house and what I say is fina-

Mc: No but literally why :/ You are not my dad also if I want to, I can easily ask diavolo to let me stay somewhere else.

Lucifer: YOU HAVE SOME NERVE SPEAKING LIKE THAT FOR A HUMAN I CAN EASILY KILL-

Mc: Sure go ahead , not like you haven't tried that before. Also, for someone who wants diavolo's plan to succeed you sure are doing a bad job at it.

Like plsss PLSSSS I just want the mc to DESTROY them ;like not in the roasting them kinda way but just like saying the plain truth so bluntly that you can't really argue against that logic.

I just want them to set the record straight like- I was brought here without my choice and any warning. Threatened and STRAIGHT UP KILLED and then forced to play therapist for these same ppl who gave a shit about me only when they knew I was a descendent of their dead sister :] (Ik that's not exactly it but you get the point)

Ooo this kind of MC is great, I love thinking about them! They'd manage to probably snap most of the brothers into better behavior after pushing MC one too many times.

The only one that would constantly struggle would probably be Lucifer, who appreciates their boldness and honesty but if it doesn't drive him absolutely mad sometimes.

And oo yeah I think about that nice tasty bit of angst often. In my own head I have it mapped out differently but the thought of MC always wondering if they'd still be dead if it weren't for luckily being connected by blood to someone who lived centuries ago. I've been meaning to write about that eventually, the aftermath of lesson 16 and my personal opinion of why everyone seemed to ignore what happened.

But yes, thanks for sharing! I love just talking things like this out with people!

[collectivecloseness]

What are some of your domestic kurt headcannons?

Oh I have soooooo many, and I know I’ll defo think of way more after posting pfft. And thank you for asking I love domestic stuff haha! If anyone wants to ask any domestic things for other characters i write too pls send em in haha! (Under the cut bc it’s a long post)

SIMP. S. I. M. P. SIIIIIMPP! Kurt is a massive simp for you. He doesn’t even give a fuck. He’d get on his knees and call you mommy and upload it to YouTube if you asked him, he’ll literally do anything. Kurt loves you sooooo much. He’s also really happy to actually have someone in his life, one person who he actually has, and it’s someone as amazing as you. Anything you want, Kurt’s going to do for you, and he’s also going to show you just how hard he tried on his way :’)

Also, linking to this, Kurt thinks you can do no wrong. Sure sometimes he can get pissy, he can have arguments with you, mostly with him being the one in the wrong (aka Kurt stop asking me to film a sex tape, Kurt you’re the one who made my friends uncomfortable by asking follow for follow they’re not being mean, Kurt you’re literally killing people stop), but generally, when he’s not acting like a sourpuss, he believes this fully. If it’s you versus not him though, versus literally anybody else, then Kurt belives this. He’s your number one supporter! He’s said number one fan too, although you said you probably preferred the other phrasing. Doesn’t matter if you’re friends are right, if you are in a disagreement, Kurt’s taking your side while listening to you rant. He’s agreeing with you, and most of the time he’ll generally think you’re right because you’re you. He’s not just mindlessly agreeing because you’re his partner too, he just believes you’re not gonna be in the wrong. Just be careful bringing up who you’re mad at, depending on what stage Kurt is at. If he’s at his ‘I’m a murderer’ stage, then that random guy who pissed you off in the 7/11 parking lot is getting run over

Kurt’s not the best at giving advice. But he can listen. If you’re angry about something, he’s angry too. He always backs you up. Whatever’s going on, he wants you to open up, he wants to talk about it. To make sure you know you can trust him. He loves you, and he’ll have your back each time. You’re his one and only. He doesn’t like yelling though. If you’re angry about something, acting really pissed off might make him a little nervous. Not of you of course, never of you, just from instinct. He hates angry screaming, so hopefully you don’t do that in front of him, if you’re mad, just don’t direct it at him while being so. Otherwise, he’s there to support you. Let it all out. Do you want him to book a rage room? He’s heard you talking about one the next town over with your friends. Will hugging make you feel better? Or do you want him to text someone asking them to back off? Do you want him to call your work and tell them you’re sick so you can stay at home? He’s there to help you out.

Kurt will drive you anywhere. Doesn’t matter how far, doesn’t matter if he has to get up early, doesn’t matter if you can just walk. Unless you specifically repeat to Kurt that you do not need nor want him to drive you, he’s swinging his keys by the front door, ready for you. Especially if it’s at night. LA and Azusa aren’t exactly the safest places in the dark, but nowhere is at night. You could be a five minute walk away, and Kurt will be outside ready and waiting for you. Even if it’s just a short walk, Kurt would walk with you at that time. He’ll also drive you super long distances. You need to go 18 hours on a semi road trip? Cool, you book the motels, and Kurt will look up the best routes. Even before you were dating, Kurt would offer these massive drives. It gave him more time to spend with you, and showed how cool and responsible and kind he is, as well as letting him help you, and maybe even protect you!

Kurt’s pretty happy to share out responsibilities. He absolutely doesn’t expect you to do everything for him, but he also doesn’t want to feel like you’re using him! He can get stressed doing too many chores in one day, but letting him breathe and take a shower to not feel overstimulated, let him edit his videos for a bit to clear his mind, and taking up the washing dishes for today, can really help Kurt feel looked after. Feel seen. That sometimes he just needs a break. And he’ll always make things even, especially if he ever feels like he’s failed on a task, on providing responsibility. He’s generally quite good at getting what he needs done. Just look at how hard he consistently works on his channel! He genuinely has a good work ethic, having tried with Kurtsworld96 for years, and continuing to do so, and making sure to be a top notch spree driver. Showing cool sites, having free water and gum, making friendly conversation. He’ll even swap the good tasks with you, letting you take his dogs on a walk while he hoovers, just to see your smile as you come back. And he’s very happy to get kisses from you, and his pits, when you return. Household responsibilities aren’t like a top priority though. He’s not going to care much if you haven’t unpacked the laundry basket for three days because you forgot, he’ll probably just rummage in there for what he needs, and throw you a shirt, slingshotting it into your bed, before getting dressed, it’s really nbd.

When you two aren’t doing anything, come cuddle with him. He’ll pat his legs and smile at you with a stammered “Th-It’s free real estate :)!” Or let him sit on your lap, Kurt likes that too :)). Just shuffle closer to him, sit thigh to thigh as he puts his arm around the back of your sofa, and both of you lay your heads on each other. He might suffer a bit of mouth breathing the first few times you do that, but that’s just because he’s nervous, he gets better. And when you touch his hair ohhhhh... Kurt looooooves when you touch his hair. He can get a bit self conscious about it. In fact, he didn’t used to like anyone touching it, but that immediately flipped a complete 180 into him wanting you to touch it more than anything else, when he first fell for you. Kurt is not afraid to use the word snuggle either. He likes it, you like it, it’s the word that describes what you two are doing! Why wouldn’t he ask “Do- do you wanna s-snuggle, right now, babe?”

Kurt’s the type to ask “Are you mad at me?” a lot. And sometimes, it’s because you’re genuinely just a little pissed at him. He can accidentally do things that frustrate you, he can mess up. But he usually doesn’t mean it. Which nearly makes it worse because it’s like he didn’t even realise what he was saying/doing, or think about his actions maybe being wrong, or non empathetic, until you have to get him to look at it from another pov. He’ll apologise after though. And you know he doesn’t mean whatever not so good thing he does, you hug him as you’re both facing each other in bed at the end of the night. Although sometimes that lingering feeling still stays with you, even after you ‘forgive’ him. Some of Kurts behaviour... it can just add up, that uneasy feeling even after it was talked about, still there, something below the surface of Kurt, or your relationship, you hadn’t touched on... Although most of the time you’re genuinely not mad at Kurt. He’s just concerned. He can get a bit anxious. And if he thinks you’ve been giving him a bit of the silent treatment, or you’ve been acting colder, or short tempered, even if that’s not objectively true, any sign you’re upset with him, Kurt wants to make sure that he can make up for what’s wrong, or check if he has messed up in the first place. Sometimes, he only really feels a bit numb, except with a bit of an ‘oh’ inside him when you bring up a small concern. He apologises, making sure you’re not actually too uspet, and makes sure to give you lots of cuddles to feel better. He might be a bit confused over what he has done, until you say it, and he just feels kinda... average, he guesses? Not feeling too much of anything, anything bad at least. Not really thinking that was was a bad thing at the time, but still sorry you were upset by him, focusing on a quick apology and smoothing over the small uspet, problem solved. But sometimes, Kurt can beat himself up for messing up quite a bit. Even after you two have talked, he’ll go into his car and slam the wheel with his hands and swear and shake his entire car as he takes a second to get his internal rage out. He doesn’t understand why sometimes he just fucks up. His parents seemed to treat him like he’d always been a fuck up. Even his peers, and strangers, in real life and on the internet, didn’t seem to disagree. Not you though. If he thought his whole life was one series of him fucking up, you were the light to show him that wasn’t true. But if he has messed up, it can really upset Kurt, to think he’s still just a screw up. Mostly, that he hurt you, that you were upset, and maybe you wouldn’t forgive him. It doesn’t even always matter if it was a big issue or a little one, although obviously the extremes are differnet. He might react either way, to any problem.

Any food you want? You got it! Kurt will input ‘I feel like having so and so tonight’ but if you ask first, he’s more than happy for you two to blast songs with the car window open and go collect! Or to lay on top of you flatly so you can’t get away from him, while he orders Uber eats on his phone. That way you two can lay together, and you can stroke his hair while he lays his head in your chest, until he needs to go answer the door. Even snacks, any cravings you have, Kurt will fulfil. It’s a pretty useful job he had, because you can text Kurt “I’m craving cake.” And after he’s dropped off his client about twenty minutes later, you have Kurt at the door, presenting you with a full birthday cake. With your favourite drink too. Giving you a kiss, and an order to dig in, he’ll have some later, as he goes back to work. Well, maybe after five minutes of kisses, and okay a bite of cake, he’ll go back to work! This also links into him always finding a knickknack in stores, as he goes around gas stations and grocery shops, and usually bringing you home a little gift after work, even if it’s just a funny looking ornament from the 99c store. If he finds something that makes him smile because it reminds him of you, he’ll pick it up on his way out.

He always likes to make sure you’re okay. More than that, actually, happy. If he senses you’re cold, he’ll ask, and bring you a blanket, cuddling you and fiddling with your hands in his, keeping them warm. If you’re hot, then he’s setting up a fan, even if he has to fix or macgyver one, grabbing you ive from the freezer to make your iced coffee you have all the cool ingredients for, or he’ll even drive to the store to grab you both slushies and ice cream, leaving the ac blasting for you. He’s not perfect, but one of the only things Kurt’s not very good at getting up and physically doing for you, is giving you space. He can’t really... commit, to doing that. And if you ask it of him, there may be more problems, at least in Kurt’s mind, after that

Kisses all the time. Kisses in private. Kisses in public. Kisses in the toilets. Kisses on camera. Kurt is very happy to be a pda guy. When you’re at home it’s unlimited. In restaurants, he’d still sit on your lap in the booth if he could, hell, he’d gotten away with it a few times when you were both drunk, and too giggly to care as you ordered more drinks. He’ll make out with you in full view of the public, on a random street. He’ll kiss- no, make out with your neck, hands only just on the verge of naughty, parked between two cars in a very crowded parking lot. He’ll upload videos of him giving you hickies in a club, to his story, if you allow. He’ll declare his love for you in the middle of a Walmart. Kurt dreams of being the epitome of ‘those couples’ in theme park lines, and when he gifts you a trip to one one weekend, he definitely lives out that dream.

He really has very few boundaries in general, when it comes to you. Hell, he doesn’t consider half of some things others would as ‘weird’, like why wouldn’t he continue jacking off even when you came into the bedroom for your shoes, or shower while you’re on the toilet, or aim between your legs as you both peed... well, as long as you don’t think certain things are weird, Kurt is pretty happy having very loose boundaries with you. If he can be himself, even better! Kurt loves you. Obviously there’s some things he wouldn’t want you to see, but he’s pretty happy doing anything and everything if it involves you being around.

Kurt shares everything with you! All of his thoughts (which is a stream), his feelings (whenever he’s identifying them), his memories, his traumas, his hopes and dreams, everything. He’d really love for you to be a part of Kurtsworld96. A part of his community. He’ll probably pressure you to be in his videos. Join him in his endeavours, let him post you on his socials, and post him back, of course making sure to tag him! He really wants you to be a recurring part of his channels, his socials, all his accounts. It’ll probably start some fights if you don’t want to. Recurring fights too, unless you give Kurt a solid reason that he can actually understand/believe/respect as to why not. Or you come to some sort of compromise. Even then, he’ll probably push for more after a while, for the level of interactivity he wants you to have in his socials. He asks you to help him choose some beats with his music too! When he’s deciding between different routes in his song. Even spreeing, he likes having you in the front seat with him to keep him company sometimes. Telling other passengers you were a fellow user on spree social, or even saying it was an emergency and he had to pick you up too, so sorry about that, because he doesn’t want his rating to go down. Kurt actually really cares about his Spree rating, he’s a very highly rated driver in Azusa. On drives however, there’s been one or two occasions you’ve had to ask Kurt to pull over, when he’s seemingly without realising admitted a traumatic, or at least good enough to talk about in a therapy session, fucked up thing that’s happened in his past. And you’ve had to ask him to stop so you two could actually talk about it. Even if Kurt shrugs and says he doesn’t really see it as a big deal. His mind is still pretty open to you, when he has something on it, or when you ask. Although he keeps some of his... his darker thoughts, a secret. He doesn’t want you to know about them. Not unless- not unless, at some point, he has to tell you.

What’s a good strong point for your relationship, is that Kurt is very good to just hang out with. Domestic wise, you two can share a room for days, and the vibe will stay chill :). Kurt can have his quiet moments where he’s editing, or watching a film with you, or gaming. And then he can have times where he’s letting you bite him over and over, as he asks do you think you’d rather have fingers that are cow udders, or have to be Bobby’s pr team right now. And then when you ask what the hell that means, and you thought you two were playing ‘whose parents have the most milf/dilf energy’ Kurt updates you on all the juicy gossip over on his corner of YouTube. All the while still letting you bite him. He can have his crazy energy moments too. Which can be very fun, and even get you up and doing things you most often wouldn’t. But just the both of you being able to live in peace, in each other’s company, for long periods of time, is one of the highlights of your relationship

[bedlemboy]

More Incorrect Star Wars Quotes

Maul: I called you here because I’m in peril!

Ezra: Pft! Peril.

Maul: Don’t pft my peril! Someone’s trying to kill me! That's why I called my Apprentice!

Ezra: I’m not your apprentice, I’m your worst enemy! Get it through your head!

Maul: This kind of bickering is what makes us such an adorable couple!

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Maul: Mama, this is my apprentice, Ezra Bridger. And this is my personal assistant, Mangy Kanan.

Kanan: You can just call me Kanan, ma’am. Maul: Mangy Kanan used to be a homeless gentleman. I work with a charity that finds jobs for down-on-their-luck Jedi.

Mother Talzin: Oh, that’s sweet! He’s been so good to your people!

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Maul: I can’t help it. You’re like a son to me. A white, crispy son.

Ezra: How would that even work? Am I adopted or something?

Maul: No, your mother’s just really pale. Almost invisible. 

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Maul (escaping): Ezra, I can’t hear you through the vacuum of space! I’ll just assume you’re finally admitting to be my apprentice!

Ezra: Dammit, Maul! I will bring you to justice one day!

Maul: No you’re MY best friend! I’m so proud of us for finally being able to say it!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Quinlan: Ventress, I know we just met, and I don't wanna be too forward. . .

Kenobi: Quinlan.

Quinlan: Sometimes you just get a feeling about a person!

Kenobi: Quinlan.

Quinlan Vos: I've got that feeling about you. I like you. I think tonight we-

Kenobi: Quinlan, look down!

Quinlan: Oh. . . shoot.

Ventress: They just gave me ten years in prison.

Kenobi: . . . She didn't say no!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ventress: Will you tell my sweet Mother Talzin the inspiring story about how Maul saved from being a mulch-butt hoe?

Ahsoka: . . . That is 100 percent accurate, Ma’am.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Maul: Oh, my God, Lady Tano, are you saying what I think you're saying?!

Ahsoka: Yes. You have a copycat!

Maul: I didn't think I'd accomplished enough in my career for this!

Ahsoka: I know, it's big!

Maul: It just feels so good to be seen, you know?!

Ahsoka: Wait. The only way to catch a copycat is to team up with the original crime lord!

Maul: I'm back in the Order! Give me a lightsaber!

Quinlan Vos: Absolutely not.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hondo Ohnaka: Hey, who’s your boyfriend?

Ventress: Who said boyfriend? Quinlan services my needs and then shuts his pretty little mouth so I can get down to BUSINESS. Make ‘em bounce, daddy!

Quinlan: (sighs, does the pec-pop)

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Maul: Stop caressing my baby sister!

Quinlan Vos: How can I be caressing HER with MY pecs?

Maul: Look at those things! They have thumbs!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ventress: I am a grown woman, Maul! I. NEED. TO. SMUSH.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Bo-Katan: I can’t believe Quinlan Vos is dating Maul’s sister. I remember when Kenobi made out with my sister, I was mad at him for ten years!

Kenobi: That was only five years ago.

Bo-Katan: And you’ve still got five left.

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Quinlan: Ventress has a ranch on Dathomir where she goes when she’s on the run. She’s there now, getting rid of the scorpions. Or adding more scorpions. I dunno, the reception was bad.