#and the last thing I posted was for Sirius’ birthday

[icarianstars]

Crowley <3

[amiableness]

Threads ; part one

Pairing: Sirius Black x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 2.4k

Warnings: Language, angst, anxiety? Let me know if there's more!

A/N 💌 Part one is finally here, thank you for all being so patient with me and I promise the future parts will be better!

Interaction keeps me motivated to write, so I would love to hear your thoughts!

Series Masterlist!

The Great Hall is thrumming with activity as the anticipation of the new school year sets in. 

Sunlight pours through the windows, casting a warm, golden hue onto the tables and cold walls. The clinking of cutlery melds with the lively chatter and bursts of laughter that permeate the hall. Students eagerly catch up with their friends after the summer break, their faces illuminated with excitement and anticipation for the year ahead.

"I don’t know if I’m quite ready for this year." You admit softly. Lily, seated to your left, casts a surprised glance in your direction. Your tone carries a hint of nervousness, a stark difference from your usual excitement for the new school year.

As seventh year begins, the reality of it all felt surreal, almost as if time had slipped through your fingers without warning. Contemplating life beyond Hogwarts seemed daunting, a foggy landscape you weren't quite prepared to navigate. The thought of a future without the familiar halls and comforting routines left you feeling unsettled. Questions about your path post-Hogwarts lingered causing anxiety to tighten in your stomach. The uncertainty of what lay ahead, and where your friendships would stand in the grand scheme of things, clouded your mind.

"Because this is the year you find your soulmate?" Marlene's question hung in the air, causing your stomach to sink even further.

Soulmates were tethered by a thread, an intangible connection that tightens with proximity, drawing them closer by an irresistible pull. As their 18th birthday approached, the magnetic pull between soulmates intensified, drawing them closer together in an undeniable bond. 

Even in their younger years, soulmates could sense the faint tug of their connection, though it often was difficult to discern between fleeting infatuation and the unbreakable bond between soulmates. However, as the milestone birthday drew nearer, the pull became unmistakable, a magnetic force guiding them to their soulmate. 

At least, that's what you've heard from those who have experienced it firsthand.

“I don’t know if I’m ready for that.” You confirm, and Lily sends you an understanding look. Neither of you had found your soulmates, while Marlene had found her soulmate in Dorcas.

The timing of finding one's soulmate varied greatly from person to person. Some discovered theirs early on in life, while others didn't find theirs until mere days before their 18th birthday. It all depended on the person and how open they were to the connection.

"We'll be going through it together." Lily says, her smile soft as she bumped her shoulder against yours. It did offer some comfort. Lily Evans had been your best friend since first year, and the thought of her being by your side made the upcoming year feel a bit more bearable.

"What if James is your soulmate?" You ask, your tone laced with playful teasing. However, Lily's hopeful expression catches you off guard, prompting you to shift your gaze towards Marlene in shock. Across the table, Marlene and Dorcas appear just as taken aback by Lily's unexpected reaction. It's a stark contrast from the adamant denials she would have offered last year.

"Maybe he is." Lily says quietly, her tone nonchalant as she offers a simple shrug, as if what she just said isn't a big deal.

“Are you..When did this happen?” Dorcas asks, and you and Marlene eye Lily curiously.

Since the moment you met him, Lily had been skillfully evading James's advances, urging him to seek out his true soulmate rather than pursuing her. Despite Lily's dismissals, James remained steadfast in his belief that she was the one destined for him. Deep down, you sensed a potential soulmate connection between them, but you never brought up the subject with Lily, knowing she would vehemently deny the idea.

Lily looks up with feigned innocence, “What?”

Marlene sighs, “Lily Evans, don’t you dare play dumb. When did your feelings towards James change?” 

"I don’t know. Over the summer, I guess, I realized I’ve been a bit unfair to him," She sighs. "He’s been nothing but kind, and I’ve just blown him off. And honestly, he was on my mind most of the summer."

"Merlin, we've barely been here for two hours, and the soulmate bonds are already starting." Marlene grins, amused.

"I didn't say I thought he was mine!" Lily cries out.

"You said maybe. That heavily implies that you do." You chuckle at the panicked look on Lily’s face, fully aware that she's going to be teased about this relentlessly.

"Have you felt a pull with him?" Dorcas asks, and Lily's cheeks flush with a delicate shade of pink.

“I mean, yes. But couldn’t that just be the annoyance I feel towards him half the time?” Lily asks.

"With that logic, you and Sirius are soulmates." Marlene interjects, her grin mischievous as she takes a sip of her tea, her gaze fixed on you over the brim of her mug. Your expression sours at the mere mention of his name, a subtle shift in mood palpable in the air.

“There is no way that Sirius Black is my soulmate.” You snark, the mere thought of Sirius causing your stomach to knot with intense emotion. Hatred, you conclude.

It's the mere mention of Sirius Black that tends to stir up the worst in you. His name alone triggers a cascade of emotions within you, igniting a visceral reaction that you struggle to contain. Just the thought of him is enough to set your nerves on edge, reminding you of past conflicts and tensions that still linger beneath the surface.

It's not as though you hadn't attempted to be friendly with Sirius. Shortly after your arrival at Hogwarts, James Potter had introduced himself to you and Lily in the Gryffindor common room. He was accompanied by Remus, and while James eagerly engaged Lily in conversation, you found yourself drawn to Remus, the two of you hitting it off. You chatted for what felt like hours, so engrossed in your conversation that you barely noticed Sirius and Peter entering the common room.

However, the moment your eyes landed on Sirius, it felt as though the air had been knocked out of your lungs. For a brief second you had wondered if he was your soulmate. Everything blurred into a hazy backdrop, your eyes unable to part from his figure.

Remus didn’t miss the way you seemed to drift away from the conversation, your gaze fixed on Sirius as he made his way over to where you all were seated. You and Remus occupied the couch, while Lily and James were comfortable in their own armchairs. Sirius and Peter hovered nearby, a curious expression etched across their features, clearly unsure who the two unfamiliar girls engaged in conversation with their friends were.

Remus had introduced you while James and Lily remained preoccupied, not yet noticing the two boys, "Mates, this is Y/n," Remus had said, his warm smile welcoming.

Peter had been friendly and eager, extending his hand with enthusiasm as he shared a bit about himself. But Sirius remained silent, his expression etched with a subtle frown. When you attempted to engage him in conversation, he responded with curt one-word answers, leaving you feeling increasingly self-conscious, questioning what you might have done wrong.

Remus had assured you that Sirius wasn't usually like that, and he promised that the next time you saw him, he would likely be more talkative and outgoing. You clung to hope, eagerly anticipating a change in Sirius' demeanor, only to be met with disappointment when his behavior remained unchanged. In the company of others, he exuded friendliness, cracking jokes and radiating outgoing energy. 

Yet, when his attention turned to you, he completely shifted, hardly communicating and barely sparing you a glance.

You couldn't figure out what you might have done wrong. From the moment you met Sirius, you had been nothing but friendly, offering a warm smile and introducing yourself with genuine enthusiasm. Lily, who shared many similarities with you, greeted Sirius in much the same manner, yet he responded to her without hesitation. It left you wondering: what had been so different about your interaction with him?

Over time, frustration crept in, and you found yourself growing increasingly sarcastic or curt in your interactions with him. Before long, your relationship devolved into incessant bickering and exchanging snide comments.

Any inkling that Sirius might be your soulmate was swiftly forgotten.

"Oi! Princess! You talking about me over there?" Sirius' voice cuts through the chatter, drawing your attention to the Marauders down the table. His cocky smirk meets your gaze, and for a fleeting moment, you wonder if he overheard your conversation. But he's too far away to have eavesdropped, yet close enough to call out to you, and his voice effortlessly grabs the attention of quite a few other students at the Gryffindor table. 

The students in your year hardly flinch, accustomed to the heated banter that often erupted between you and Sirius. Observing the familiar fighting between you and Sirius was almost expected; it wouldn't have felt like the first day of school without it for some of the students.

“Not everything revolves around you, Black.” You retort, rolling your eyes at his arrogance. Anger begins to simmer within you, heat radiating through your body as frustration builds.

You assume he must have just noticed you, considering you've been had a peaceful morning so far. But little did you know, Sirius had fixed his gaze on you the moment he entered the hall, and he's been eager to get under your skin. Anything to capture your attention.

Sirius, undeterred, flashes a grin that seems to stretch from ear to ear. “So mean already. Didn’t you miss me? The months without you were unbearable.” He calls, his tone dripping with amusement, clearly deriving great enjoyment from riling you up.

“Do you really think I spend my free time thinking about you?” You're sending him an irritated frown, but your eyes are lit up with a fire that's reserved only for him. It's the same look you get every time the two of you fight, and he loves it.

"I think you do, princess. I think I drive you crazy.” He declares with that smug grin plastered on his face, igniting a burning sensation in your stomach.

You remain silent, too consumed by anger to muster a response. His words strike a chord because, deep down, you know he's right. He has a way of driving you to the brink of frustration. You have wracked your brain, relentlessly trying to decipher why he harbors such animosity towards you and where you might have gone wrong with him.

You're momentarily caught off guard, your mind racing to come up with a response that doesn't betray your irritation, much less let Sirius think he's gotten to you. Fortunately, Remus swiftly engages him in conversation, likely sensing the tension brewing on your face.

"I'm telling you, there's a connection there." Marlene insists, and you shoot her a glare, prompting a laugh to escape her lips.

.·。.·゜✭·.·✫·゜·。.

The initial night back at Hogwarts always proved the most challenging for you. It took a few nights before you could finally settle into the unfamiliar bed and drift off to sleep without difficulty. The weight of it being your final year lingered heavily in your mind, along with the daunting task of uncovering your soulmate.

Seated before the crackling fire, you enveloped yourself in the warmth of your blanket, captivated by the dancing of the flames. Your silent wish lingered in the air - that, perhaps, if you remained in this cozy atmosphere long enough, fatigue would gradually claim you.

"Up late thinking of me, princess?" Sirius's voice breaks the silence, causing your body to tense reflexively. You shoot him a glare over your shoulder as he settles into the floor beside you, his gaze fixed on the flickering flames instead of meeting yours.

"What are you doing?" You quip, your tone laced with irritation. Sirius glances in your direction, leaning back on his palms with a subtle smirk playing on his lips. Amusement dances in his eyes as he takes in your furrowed brows and the unmistakable look of irritation etched across your features.

“Warming up. It’s rather cold in the dorm,” He says, before glancing down at the blanket that’s wrapped around your figure. “Care to share? ”

“Get fucked,” You huff, pulling the blanket tighter around your figure, your gaze fixed on the fireplace as you ignore Sirius's laughter, “Why are you sitting here? Go somewhere else.”

“Where’s the fun in that?”

“I’m not in the mood to deal with you.” You snark, your hopes of relaxing by the fire dashed by the unexpected disruption.

“And when are you?” Sirius's tone carries a teasing edge, and a mischievous grin tugs at his lips as he observes your bristling reaction. 

He longs for you to turn and meet his gaze, to shoot him the scathing glare he's so accustomed to receiving.

You turn sharply, your eyes narrowing into thin slits as you fix them on Sirius, a silent warning brewing in your gaze. There she is, he thinks.

“Go somewhere else.” You repeat, staring Sirius down.

“No.” He declares, shifting his position to squarely face you, leaving no doubt that he has no intention of backing down or leaving anytime soon.

“What’s your problem?” You grit out your words, and Sirius narrows his eyes at you as though you've struck a nerve. His reaction is swift, catching you off guard. While you and Sirius have always engaged in banter, he had never looked at you with such palpable hatred before.

“You.” He snaps, his voice dripping with disdain, devoid of its usual teasing lilt that never fails to irk you. Instead, his expression morphs into one of genuine animosity, a stark departure from the usual banter that fuels your frustration.

“Why? What have I ever done to you?” You're worked up now, your heart thumping with frustration as you pivot to fully face him. In your angered state, you miscalculate the proximity between you, and you're startled to find yourselves mere inches apart. Neither of you budges, both refusing to back away, as doing so would feel like conceding defeat.

Neither of you speaks, the air heavy with tension as you stare at each other through narrowed eyes, chests heaving with unresolved emotions. And in a heart-stopping moment, you feel it—the undeniable tug, the unspoken connection between you.

Your mouth parts in surprise, caught off guard by the intensity of the moment. Before you can truly react, Sirius rises abruptly and strides back to his room, leaving you sitting in stunned silence by the fireplace.

TAGS: @daisiesformylove @idkbbyx3 @dreamingofmarauders @siriuslyjanhvi @urmomw4ntsme @arwensloanebarnes @harahettania @kitchenbread @ghostheartbeat @dovahqueen22 @y0urm0m12 @thebiggestnaturaldisaster @opalesquegirl @galaxystern08 @scvtdy @123iloveyou456

[babybatss-blog]

WHEN STARS ALIGN

sirius black x f!reader, 950 words

cw: Sirius has familial issues, crying, mostly just angst.

summary: fate has brought both you and Sirius to the astronomy tower after a rough night. Lucky for you two, you know just the way to comfort each other.

Letting out a deep sigh, you walk promptly towards your dorm. Merlin, you just need a break from all the stress. Between school, friends, and hobbies, you haven’t even had a moment to rest the last couple of days. It feels as if your head is underwater, and just when you break the surface a rough hand pushes you down. And right now is no exception. Bursting through the door, you see your dorm mates chatting on the floor.

“Oh hey hun! Want to join us?” One of the lively girls ask. You politely refuse, then shuffle over to your bed, pulling the curtains around it’s four posts and putting on your headphones to have a moment to yourself. Now that the music is on you close your eyes, letting yourself get pulled away by the rhythmic instruments and soothing vocals. It’s such a comforting thing, music. No matter how soft or loud, it’s there through thick and thin. Unlike your friends, who you can still hear squealing and giggling at jokes despite the volume of your music. You attempt to continue focusing on the music, but the incessant squawks from your friends completely draws you away from it.

With a huff, you get out of bed and march to the door. “Are you okay?” One asks, but you just throw a “yes” over your shoulder to her. All you need right now is some peace and quiet, high above every issue and noise. And you know exactly where to go.

Flights of stairs take you higher and higher and higher, up to the top of the colossal castle. It’s sunset now, so no one would be where your planning to go as it’s only really a night occasion. Therefore, the sight of the extroverted Sirius Black, sitting on the stone is a surprise for your weary eyes.

“Sirius?” You tentatively ask, unsure if he is just a vision from your delirious mind. The boy turns around to face you with those grey eyes that cause you to know certainly this is real. But they don’t glimmer like they usually do, instead they are misty and red behind wet eyelashes.

“Oh… Hey.”

Could he be crying? Surely not, you’ve always known him as such a enigmatic man, coated in an air of mystic and confidence that is unattainable to anyone else. “Hey Sirius. I didn’t expect to see anyone here.” He huffs a chuckle. “Me either.”

“Can I sit with you?” Ignoring your past timidness you poise the question. Why? You don’t know. But the sight of your friend whom doesn’t care about your issues seems like a welcome one, something that could ease your current tension. He nods, so you sit next to him. Against your better judgment, you ask the question weighing heavily in the air. “Are you alright…?” He thinks. Like really thinks. His brows crease and his bottom lip curls inwards at the question, as if he is a toddler asked about quantum physics. “No, not really.” He confesses, looking down at a crumpled piece of paper in his clenched hand. “Do you want to talk about it?”

Without a second to think, he sighs and hands you the piece of paper. It contains a long, written note, in dark blue ink and swirly cursive writing. It’s from a woman of the name Walburga, who seems to be his mother. But you wouldn’t guess she was if it wasn’t written in the piece, due to the long list of profanities and harsh words she berates him with. It outlines her disappointment in the boy for not appearing at his cousins birthday, and therefore he is a “regret” and “scorn” on the family name.

“Merlin Sirius…” You knew his family were pureblood purists who he doesn’t associate with, but not to this extent. Looking at the boy next to you, who now has tears streaming down his face you cannot believe his strength to put up with this for so many years.

“I don’t want to go back. I can’t go back and see them again I can’t take it” He admits, voice shaking and weak. You envelop him in a hug, his trembling shoulders dissolving in your touch. The two of you sit there for at least half an hour, him crying into your skin and you whispering words of affirmation as you rub his back.

“I’m here for you.” “Your safe.” “I’ve got you.”

After a bit, he calms down. You stroke his hair as he rereads the letter, before ripping it to shreds! “Sirius what are you-?” You start to laugh after realizing what he is doing, before picking up the remnants from the stone floor and throwing them off the balcony, watching them float down to the grass far below. Sirius does the same, before throwing an arm around you and smiling at your face watching the wisps of paper disappearing below.

“Thank you.” He says, more sincere than you have ever heard him before. You look up to his piercing eye contact, smiling at his gorgeous face. “Of course. I wouldn’t want my favourite friend to sit here sulking! “Favourite hey?” He wiggles his eye brows in response. You of course roll your eyes, because there is no way you would let him have the satisfaction of your softness any longer.

“Hey, want to go and steal some cake from the kitchen?” He asks.

“Hell yeah.” You respond.

[metalomagnetic]

genuine question- why do you cut so much from your stories? as you can probably tell, there are many people THIRSTING for more of your writing- and we're definitely not abandoning you over lengthy chapters lmao. i understand for traditional publishing why people cut so much, but since this is online and you have some very dedicated readers why you cut so much. i would literally KILL for more scenes of sirius have dinner with his mom and regulus. and sirius and narcissa. and sirius and voldemort celebrating his birthday. and so many other things!! genuinely no hate I am just curious why you make that choice? (and would you consider posting deleted scenes (you don't need to worry about editing!) for those of us who would love to read them!)

It is primarily because my chapters are already usually very long. It's both for the reader's sake, but also my own. For me, editing is hell, and editing 25-30k chapters is the last circle of hell. It sometimes takes more to edit than to write it.

And then there's the matter of importance- no matter how much fun some scenes are, they sometimes do not serve any purpose, neither for the plot, or for the character development of the character, so I just have to give up on them (not all! I already leave in plenty scenes that are just self indulgence).

Since already so many people asked for deleted scene, then I think I will publish them all (or at least those that I still have saved in some folders) once the story is done? If people would like that, I'll do it!

[camywamycam]

what was left behind in the rubble P.1

1,092 words

soon to be harry x reader

summary: you moved in with your father Sirius Black from California two months ago and he completely ignores you when Harry arrives for your birthday your adoptive father visits you and hell breaks loose.

you never knew your mom, right after you were born she left. you were only two when your father supposedly left too or at least that was what you were told. you were adopted by a nice muggle man named Joel and moved to America, you grew up with him since you had no other family and the ministry refused to give you to Remus. Joel was and is your best friend. most people wouldn't say that about their parents but you always did. he taught you how to skate, how to surf, and how to play lacrosse. during the school year, you attended Ilvermorny and during the summer you attended muggle school. you had friends and family there and everything was great until a giant man appeared at your door and somehow convinced your dad to send you to a school in Scotland. you were going into your 4th year and it was still summer? why did you have to go now? and on top of all of that, you would have to go through being a new kid all over again so you were very so not excited. you walked down the stairs holding your heavy suitcase and sat it at the front door so you could beg your dad not to send you. "Dad, what would I even do in Scotland? what if I get kidnaped? I don't know anyone there please don't send me there I can barely understand British people ill never be able to get the hand on Scottish accents what about my band!" the giant man stared at you and your father, obviously confused by your California English   " you have to go it's only for a few months you will be back in no time" you dad said comfortingly "er I believe we've ought to be goin' now" the giant man said in a thick accent as you picked up you bags and looked at your dad for the last time as the man apperated the two of you in front of two buildings.

  you watched in shock as a third building appeared and the man just walked in casually with you trailing behind him. Once you got inside you noted the darkness of the house, it all seemed very gloomy. the giant man walked into a dining hall as you stood behind him still holding your suitcase. "go on, introduce yourself don't be shy" the giant said in a hushed voice loud enough to be heard by everyone. "um..hey" you said not sure of what to say as Hagrid stepped to the side making you able to be seen. the adults looked at you as if you had a fish head and the children just sat there confused, then one of the women at the table jumped up and hugged you tightly "Oh you poor dear!" the ginger woman shrieked as she suffocated you, were all Brits this friendly? you looked at Hagrid with a look that screamed help me and he gently pried Mrs. Weasly off of you. She clasped her hands together "You look just like your father" she said with glassy eyes. you looked around the table confused "Is there something going on that I'm not aware of or something?" you said exasperated. a dark-haired man cried into the shoulder of a brown-haired man whose face was littered with scars. Hagrid looked at you confused "You don't know?" "know what!?" Hagrid leaned close to your ear and whispered "That's yer dad" There was a beat of silence and the children looked as if they were just now hearing about this. "what. the. fuck.

that was three months ago. you met your dad and for the first few days things were rocky but nice, until some kid named harry potter showed up lightning scar and all. it hurt that your dad had literally forgotten about you five days after meeting you but you didn't care, you still had Joel. what pissed you off though is that you couldn't go home for your birthday and spend it with your friends. so now here you were, in a room that isn't yours scrolling through your phone and liking all your friend's birthday posts they tagged you in. You planned on calling them later on. you received a text from your dad (you call Joel's dad and Sirius by his name) telling you to come downstairs. maybe he sent me a gift? you thought as you walked downstairs in your pajamas. to your surprise there was Joel holding a strangely wrapped present. he looked kind of different, he hadn't shaved. "Dad!" all the people in the room who had seemingly been interrogating him looked at you with shock as you jumped off the stairs and attacked him with a hug "I missed you too sugar cube!" Joel said ruffling your hair. The two of you broke apart and you ignored the stares of the people around you and the glare Sirius was giving "how did you get here! when did you get here? how long are you staying?" you rambled on as Joel laughed at your excitement "I got here a good 4 minutes ago and I think I might stay a day or two" you smiled impossibly wider and hugged him again. " actually I would prefer you left today." Sirius said pissy as hell. you ignored him knowing it's better to ignore him when he's petty like this. you weren't surprised that the people in the room were shocked, Remus, Molly, and some others had been trying to connect with you for a while but you had been so closed off they assumed you liked to be left alone and left it at that, but now you were ecstatically jumping around this strange American man like you were insane. "hey you still haven't opened my present!" Joel said prying you off him, obviously not comfortable with the attention you were bringing towards him as if the people couldn't be more shocked when Joel said "Happy birthday kid!" the entire room went silent and everyone looked at Sirius as he looked like he was going to faint. you ripped open the package and almost fainted yourself when you spotted a new board with the grip tape already on. "holy shit thanks Dad!" and with that, Sirius fainted.

[i-think-too-loud]

i apologize for my last post and leave you with this:

-regulus threatening first years of bribing house elves to sneak gifts into the gryffindor towers for him (because he can’t be seen associating with Sirius but he can’t just NOT give him a christmas/birthday gift)

-sirius waiting outside grimmauld place in his animagus form to see regulus because he just needs to know his brother is alive, at the very least

-regulus seeing a black dog following him all summer and seeing him around hogwarts and think of him as a (pet) friend

-regulus being the one that called sirius “Snuffles” first

-older sirius hearing harry call him the same name and now seeing not only his best friend when he looks at his godson but his baby brother too

-reg told sirius he was dating james first. he even asked sirius’s permission (because that’s the type of person regulus is. and while james was content to keep it from his friend until things got more serious, Regulus was a gentleman through and through and couldn’t imagine not asking for a blessing)….and he was too scare to ask Effie and Monty

-regulus raided sirius’ room after he left (because he missed his brother and wanted to feel closer to him) and stole a bunch of records (Starman by Bowie was his favorite for obvious reasons)

-sirius tried to convince regulus to get a muggle tattoo for years and regulus always said he didn’t want to (he was too scared to.) the week after sirius left, he got one. sirius’ constellation right over his heart.

-remus taught sirius how to box and sirius started taking classes and becoming really good at it. sirius always told people it was because he was picturing reg’s face on his opponent (he was actually picturing walburga and orion and how he’d be able to protect reg from them now)

-reg never having been mad at sirius for leaving. not even for a second. (he knew what his parents would have done to him if he hadn’t and would never begrudge his brother his freedom)

AKA: the black brothers caring about each other always, even if they were never taught how to express that love and those emotions in a healthy way

[iwriteasfotini]

August Full Moony Excerpt

I am so excited to share this story with everyone. Waiting is SO hard. In celebration of the full moon tonight, here is a Remus centric short excerpt from The Heir and The Spare, Chapter IX - Birthday and Worst Day. This year is written fully from Sirius’ POV. I present to you budding Wolfstar. :)

An hour later Sirius had a stomach full of sugar and chocolate and lay happily in his bed, thinking this was hands down the best birthday he had ever had. And he was now twelve years old. Next year he would be thirteen! He wished Regulus could have been a part of the evening escapade. He was sure Regulus would have enjoyed it. He hadn’t even sent Sirius a note, though Sirius knew this was likely not Regulus’ fault and his mother was most definitely responsible for the lack of birthday greetings. 

“Sirius?” 

Sirius twitched violently, “woah, you scared me!” He pulled his curtains back and made out Remus’ silhouette in the dark room. 

“Um, I am really really, like really embarrassed…” Remus began.

Oh no, thought Sirius, this is going to be about what happened earlier. 

“And I know it’s your birthday but would-you-mind-doing-that-thing-you-did-for-me-that-one-time.” Remus said this last bit very fast and then hung his head. 

“Um,” it took Sirius a beat to catch up in his chocolate induced lethargy. “Oh, you mean…” And his voice trailed off. What was he supposed to say? The time when I cuddled you to sleep and stroked your hair and told you a story to help you feel less sad and alone because that is what I know how to do for people because it is what my little brother needs from me?

Instead Sirius sat up and swung his legs out of bed. 

“You don’t have to if it’s…”

“Yes, Remus, yes.”

They padded across the bedroom together and got into Remus’ bed. Sirius got situated, and Remus got comfortable in his arms. As Remus let out a contented sigh and Sirius ran his fingers through his curly hair, an unbidden thought crossed his mind. His best ever birthday had just gotten even better. Sirius smiled to himself in the darkness and then he began.

“A long time ago, in a far-off land, there lived a foolish King who decided that he alone should have the power of magic…” 

...

Check out more about the series in my pinned post. I post a writing update every week and daily posting of The Heir and The Spare will begin on AO3 on October 31!

[sideprince]

Speaking of James, what do you think of him in the prequel + Lily’s letter? She mentioned him not having the chance to go on excursions without the cloak, despite them being in hiding.

I've been thinking about this question and funnily enough it came up in another post where I had a fun back and forth with @seriousbrat! I should probably preface my answer by saying that I haven't put that much thought into James or Lily in general, and I don't really spend time in the parts of the fandom that discuss them at length, so my thoughts are based on a cursory revisiting of the text. Some of what I say may be basic stuff for the Jily/Marauders/¯\_(ツ)_/¯ parts of the fandom, some of it may be stuff that has already been counter argued with points I haven't thought of, etc. This isn't my area of interest, but your question is interesting! Tl;dr proceed with caution I guess lol.

The first thing that comes to mind about the letter from Lily to Sirius is why she wrote it in the first place. My own reading of it is that it's meant to be exposition more than something that has to do with a thought out relationship between these characters. Like many others, I'm frustrated with the minimal and flat way Lily is written. We get very few insights into who she was, most of them through descriptions from other characters like Slughorn. To me it's clear that Rowling held back on her for the sake of the big reveal at the end of DH, and I think a lot of Lily's character development got thrown under the bus as a result. But it could also just be that Lily is writing a thank you to Sirius for Harry's birthday present and it was the only time she ever sent him anything, but in the process she's giving him an update since they know each other as well as anyone knows their spouse's best friend.

In her letter she writes:

James is getting a bit frustrated shut up here, he tries not to show it but I can tell - also, Dumbledore’s still got his Invisibility Cloak, so no chance of little excursions. If you could visit, it would cheer him up so much.

Deathly Hallows Ch. 10

Lily is showing a lot of sympathy for James here, while also acknowledging that if he had his Invisibility Cloak he would probably be sneaking out under it. I know that this implication is contentious across fandoms, and my own thoughts on it are: it falls within James' character to do something like that and be reckless, but while I think it's irresponsible and shitty, I also don't think he's satan incarnate for it, by any means. To me it - and how young James tends to be written - shows that he's an immature guy in a war where he spends most of his time shut up in a comfortable house instead of fighting (ie. his ideals aren't tested or challenged by trauma), and the first chance he gets to do something brave he forgets his wand on the couch and is immediately killed. I think James had very good intentions but kind of bad follow through.

In her letter, Lily is also asking Sirius to come visit to cheer James up, which I find strange, given the two men are such close friends. Why should Lily have to ask Sirius to visit? Are he and James not in touch? Or is Lily being thoughtful and identifying James needs and trying to meet them when he hasn't done so himself? Again, I think this letter is more about exposition, so I don't think there's any significant meaning here, just that the author was a bit careless. Lily then goes on to say:

Wormy was here last weekend, I thought he seemed down, but that was probably the news about the McKinnons; I cried all evening when I heard.

For me there's a conspicuous absence of any note referring to what a comfort James was. I talked about this in my other ask, but I think a lot of James, and as an extension his relationship with Lily, is the author's projection of her own experience in an abusive relationship and what she wishes it had been. That isn't to say I think James abused Lily, but rather that Rowling transferred some of her abusive husband's qualities onto James, while also projecting a fantasy of what she wished he had been onto the character too, ie. a devoted, loving father onto him who would - and did - die for his family. A lot of James' actions, mannerisms, and words - his arrogance, dismissiveness, and enjoyment of cruelty towards select people he has dehumanized - raises my own red flags as an abuse survivor. While I think he was a bully at school - and bullying is a form of abuse - I don't think he was abusive to his wife or child. I could draw a parallel with the phenomenon of the prison guard who enacts cruelty on his charges freely and then goes home and is a loving, doting husband and father who wouldn't hurt a fly, because he only abuses those he dehumanizes. Instead, though, what I think is going on is that Rowling is projecting a lot of her first husband onto James, and unconsciously and unintentionally leaving a trail of abuser red flags written into his character.

It hits hard for me that Lily is concerned enough about James, and empathetic enough of him, that she shares her worry about his frustration and cabin fever with his best friend, and asks him to come visit, because she wants to cheer James up - yet she makes no mention of James being a comfort to her when she spends all night crying about her friend being murdered. In short, Lily is identifying and attending to James' needs but we see no indication that this is reciprocated. It doesn't feel out of line for an abuse victim to describe a relationship like this, especially since it would be so simple to have added something like, "as difficult as it is being shut up in this cottage, it was a great comfort to have James that night."

It's odd to me that someone thoughtful enough to attend to their spouse's emotional needs would forgo expression appreciation for them doing the same, so my reading of this is that James doesn't provide Lily with the same kind of comfort. More importantly, it doesn't seem to be on Rowling's radar to mention how James reacted to his wife outright crying for a whole evening, which tracks with how a lot of abuse victims understand relationships, ie. it often doesn't occur to them that they should be reciprocal. And so, Rowling forgets to add in the bit where James offers Lily comfort, perhaps because it was something she lacked experience of and therefore didn't think to write. And while I feel the need to include the requisite statement of "fuck JKR and her transphobic, bigoted views" I also feel that despite that, I won't sink to her level and dehumanize others, and therefore feel it's still important to balance that view with sympathy for her experiences as an abuse victim.

As for the prequel, the implication seems to be that two muggle cops got in the middle of James and Sirius escaping from some Death Eaters. It's a fun little piece but also reveals that Rowling really benefits from having an editor, because the prose is overwrought and a bit clumsy. In terms of what it says about James' and Sirius' character, they don't seem at all concerned with violating the Statute of Secrecy in front of muggles, or with protecting those muggles from the three wizards who are presumably Death Eaters. James and Sirius were described by Rowling as "bad boys" and she talked about how this was something sexy that all women loved in men (which I find problematic for a number of reasons), however she doesn't seem to differentiate between youthful rebelliousness and selfish destructiveness. It's something Lupin talks about in PoA when he reflects on their youthful adventures. In any case, James and Sirius weren't rebellious - not in their bullying at school, not in their animagi nights, and not in the prequel. They weren't challenging an unfair authority or status quo, but instead were pursuing their own fun for fun's sake, and other people often get hurt, or come dangerously close to it.

In the prequel they leave the cops vulnerable and without defense with the three DEs who are knocked out and might be back on their feet any minute. Given that Death Eaters torture muggles for sport in canon, this seems like a careless and callous move. I also feel like the Phoenix shirts are a bit cheesy... Dumbledore would never? Is the idea that James and Sirius made the shirts themselves? Or is this just another clumsy literary device that exists for the sake of exposition but doesn't fit the characters all that well? I feel like if the Order did have some kind of gear with their emblem on it, it would be more subtle and also a bit more refined than a t-shirt. The idea of these besties wearing matching shirts is cute, it just feels out of character.

I'm not sure if this was the parallel you meant to draw or were asking about, but as to whether the prequel story takes place while James and Lily are in hiding, I don't think it does. James and Sirius are described as looking like they're in their "late teens" and this seems to be a pretty clear indication from the author that this is the age they're at. James and Lily are killed when they're 21, and they'd been in hiding for about a year according to @said-snape-softly's calcutations in this amazing post (though I need to adjust the timeline a bit because @saintsenara had some great thoughts too in this other post). So even if it was just a year or six months in between, I think the prequel story is set before James and Lily go into hiding.

[stashandtell]

Nobody Asked For This: My Rankings of the Hermione x Weasley Ships with REASONS

I drafted this weeks ago and had set it aside with no clear plan to publish it. Then, after a stroke of 2 AM genius this morning, I wrote a piece called Ranking the Weasleys, (to be posted on 19 Sept 2024 in honor of Hermione's birthday) and it seemed like a great time to finalize this post and share it. Feel free to tell me your rankings in the comments, be it your list of the fittest Weasley as you find them or your ranked-list of pairings with Weasleys, whatever you fancy to share. Enjoy! - - - - I made a loooong post with recs for each of my top Hermione/Weasley ships that you can check out here. Read Ranking the Weasleys or see the related post where I talk about writing Ranking the Weasleys and I share just a few initial thoughts on the fetishization of war wounds in the fandom here. - - - - I've recently dove into the world of Hermione x Any-Of-The-Weasley-Brothers pairings, which is what happens when you're burnt out on the regular ships you read and looking for something more. Personally, I'm surprised I gravitate towards so many Hermione-focused pairings, especially het pairings, but that's just what I've been into lately. I hadn't considered pairings with her and any of the Weasleys until someone recommended Charmione fics in a thread for Theomione. Once I dug into the fandom's characterizations of the Weasley brood and had a better sense of who each of them were on their own, I found I really like many of these ships, some more than others. The rankings of my top-three rotate pretty regularly depending on the last great fic I've devoured. This is a snapshot of where things stand today but it could move around. Before we dive in, I've preview my rankings and the major themes of the pairings in the most popular fics shipping Hermione with a Weasley. 1. Bill: Wolf-ish Daddy 2. Fred: Uplifting, Fun, and Romantic 3. Charlie: Sexy and Rugged 4. George: Growing Through Grief 5. Percy: Acceptance of Self, Also Rules Daddy 6. Ginny: A Firecracker and a Friend 7. Ron: Angsty Best Friends-to-Lovers 8. Gideon or Fabian: Time Travel AU or Ghost Lover(s) 9. Arthur or Molly: I haven't read these ships so they're going in the bottom of the list. I'm not opposed to reading these pairings but there's already such a trove with all the brothers in my tbr list that I'm not sure I'll ever dive in. 10. Weasley Progeny: I haven't read any of these ships. I have not read many pairings that include anyone dating their friends' kid in the next generation. (Though I have read a small number of fics pairing characters like Hermione or Ginny with older characters like Kingsley or Sirius...shoutout to the older/younger Nottcissa ship.) 11. Aunt Murial: Technically she's a Prewett but I think I would be into a Murmione ship if we got there. So far nothing comes up on AO3. - - - - 1. Billmione: What I love about a Hermione x Bill dynamic is his position as oldest-sibling and caretaker. If the author has resolved the relationship with Fleur as one that has ended in divorce or death, that extra element of emotional tenderness really can push the story to complex depths. I also find it interesting to see how writers engage with Bill's hybrid/half-werewolf affliction. I'm hard-pressed to really fall in love with any Billmione fic where their relationship starts pre-Battle of Hogwarts, though I do get it. I personally enjoy stories that can be canon compliant so I want to see how the Fleur issue is handled. I also find that with such a significant age-gap for that developmental stage of teenager-dom, (not like Fleur was THAT much older than Hermione but still...), it's incredibly rewarding to see an older Hermione that brings some kind of life experience to the relationship so she can be more equal with Bill.

In some of the fics, especially a few of the multi-Weasley, reverse-harem style pieces I've finally started reading, Bill's older-brother position and wolfy streak create the core dynamic of the group.

I'm not the biggest fan of the multi-Weasley pairings with Hermione but what I loved most in the standout fics are the group dynamics and individual roles that come out. Hermione can be incredibly stubborn and independent on her own and it's always interesting when she's in opposition to Bill to see how the others in their relationship choose sides.

- - - - 2. Fremione: On it's face, I don't even know if I like this ship all that much but I keep finding myself suckered in. I suspect a big part of it is that it hits me in the sentimental feels. My inner-teen just loves a Hermione x Fred story that traces their young love to whatever conclusion the author brings it to. Even if they get together when they're older and Fred lives through the final battle, they both usually end up with a friends-to-lovers scenario that's full of light sweetness and sometimes romance.

There are some truly fantastic works in this ship and I go 50/50 on whether I prefer ones where Fred lives or not. Depends on my mood and the tone of the story I suppose. There are very few stories in this pairing that I haven't enjoyed and the element of pranking really can make shorter fics fun.

I REALLY enjoy past Hermione/Fred relationships being included in fics where she looks back on their love fondly while she navigates new relationships, sometimes with one of his brothers. Fred is often portrayed as a goof, which seems to encourage authors to consistently write a more engaging and dynamic version of Hermione instead of following some of the fanon's (beloved by me as well) personality tropes/traps of her being insecure, slow-to-assert-herself, angry-broken-or-both and etc. His character brings out some of her best qualities consistently across fics, imo.

- - - - 3. Charmione: I quickly realized when I started reading Charmione fanfics that I do not give a shit about dragons but deeply wish I did. It's a cool plot device and part of the world to hang out with but it's not for me. Tons of appreciation for writers who have thoughtful plot lines and research interesting medical maladies-- but it's hard to hold my interest. (A million kudos when a dragon-centered fic does though!) The Reserve is usually full of original characters, which is fine, but I find myself less invested in the story if we don't know much about these OCs to build out that world.

I often find in the dragon-reserve heavy pieces that I was getting part-way through were objectively GOOD multi-chapters but I kept stalling out in favor of reading something else. Usually whenever there's a Hermione that ends up at the dragon Reserve, she's characterized by her unyielding passions for creatures' rights, spurred on by house elf and werewolf activism. Those are interesting characterizations for her but they just don't keep my attention. That said, I have yet, to date DNF'd any Charmione work so clearly it's not a huge imposition. That said, Charmione is in the top third because there's so much that can be done with this character. I've read a number of fics where Charlie is ace (asexual, demisexual, etc.); where's he's inexperienced because he's married to his job; where he's "too free-spirited" and very experienced; where he's enthusiastically bisexual; where he's not interested in marriage; where he's pining over Tonks; and so much more. His sporadic attendance at family holidays and the ability for Hermione or others to visit him on the Reserve lends to great plot opportunities.

- - - - 4. Geormione: I haven't been around long enough to fully understand why Fremione is a more popular ship than Geormione, but here are some observations: - Fred is portrayed in the fandom as the more loveable, airy goof while George tends to be painted as the more serious and quiet of the two - Generally, in the canon, Fred speaks more than George, from what I've been seeing, as I notate up my secondhand copies of the books - Fred's death or, depending on the fic, brush-with-death, is ripe for the reimagining of his relationships and personality - According to internet gossip, Hermione with Fred were considered for pairing in the canon originally but it didn't suit the overall plans for the series. Source for this can not be verified but it's come up in multiple places. I believe this contributes to the numbers: Fremione has 2182 works and Geormione has 548 works on AO3, as I draft this. All that said, George is usually characterized as the quieter and possibly more serious twin. He might be more shy than the outgoing Fred. Post-war, he often mourns the loss of his twin brother, his best friend, and his sense of himself as part of the pair which can, frankly, be kind of a drag if a writer is looking for a pairing to write a hot romance about. (Not that people can't be sexy or have healthy sexual relationships while grieving!) However, when works take the journey to establish Hermione and George, it's often incredibly rewarding. It tends to feel like Fremione with the temperature turned down on the lightness and has the ability to go deeper into any darkness that needs to be explored. I do love a Geormione but there are statistically fewer works out there than some of the other pairings, thus it's earned it's spot mid-tier. - - - - 5. Permione: There's not much to say because there aren't that many longer fics with this pairing written and most times it's tied to a Hermione x Multi-Weasley scenario. This gets the 5th and some days I would rank it higher because there are worlds in which this is the actual correct pairing of all of the brothers, based on what we can surmise from the canon.

A swotty, uptight prefect-turned-Ministry drone with a regretful heart of gold, Percy's guilt over abandoning his family and Fred dying before him is well-matched for how many writers imagine Hermione's coping with the aftermath of the war. Hermione would have known him during some prime formative years and knows he'll date muggle-born or half-blood witches, a la Penelope Clearwater. It's easy to dismiss Percy as being "not fanciable" if you don't read this ship but some of the writers out there make a compelling case for him, particularly when they make a logical transition from his personal fastidiousness to him seeking to play with control and BDSM elements in his private affairs. I love a good Permione piece. He's often positioned as the conservative punching bag of the family and it's a thing of art when a writer makes us root hard for him.

- - - - 6. Herminny: I haven't much of anything in this pairing yet. Truthfully, I've been holding off on it because I'm sure I'll do a deep dive once I start. It shouldn't come as a surprise that I've read almost no Harmony works either. I love a F/F fic but tend to read in waves and I've been working my way through the Weasley brothers pairings (when I'm not refreshing for Nevmione and Theomione works.) If you have any excellent recs for Herminny or other pairings name, please drop me a line! The reason Herminny is above Romione is because I love many of the fanon characterizations of Ginny in all the other fics I've read, especially when she's mischievous, cheeky, in tune with her sexuality, and ready to take on her own adventures in the world. The ones I have read where she and Hermione have been together were lovely but most were very short fics in collections. - - - - 7. Romione: I read A LOT of Hermione-centered works and authors very often find a need to resolve the young romance with Ron or use him and their relationship as a catalyst that propels our heroine down a path into the arms of another man. I can honestly say that I have read ZERO Romione endgame fics to date, and that includes one shots AND drabbles (~100k words or less.) WILD, right?

I really enjoy angst and Ron is one of the punching bags most often leaned on by writers. One of these days, I'm going to go on a Romione bender as an offering of penance to his character for all of the times I rooted against him in every other fic.

- - - - 8. Lowest Tier: I have never read a Hermione x Molly nor an Hermione x Arthur fic, and while I'm not fundamentally opposed, I'd be flabbergasted to find either pairing beating Romione. I'd much sooner read an Arthur/Molly fic than one that ships either with Hermione because that's just where I'm at right now. I'm happy reading works that aren't smutty in any way but damn if some smut doesn't help along a work that really isn't capturing my interest. While I love when I see versions of Arthur and Molly who are loving friends and/or parental figures to Hermione, the angst-lover in me doesn't mind a solid bashing of either of them and it's hard to get that out of my head. As for the other possible pairs with Hermione and Gideon, Fabian, Murial, or the children of the other Weasleys, I'm just not well-read enough in any of those pairings to have an opinion. I literally only started reading Marauders-era works two weeks ago (and really ONLY well-known Wolfstar fics so far.) A Note About Fleur: One character who's excluded from this list is Fleur Weasley nee' Delacour. I've only read triad- or multi-Weasley fics that put Hermione with her and Bill. While I do love a Bill/Fleur/Hermione work, it seemed disingenuous to rank Fleurmione against the others with what little I've read. That and I'm so clearly jazzed about a Billmione where Bill's free-and-clear to be with whoever, that my ranking of Fleurmione would be heavily biased.

[mkaugust]

Soulmate AU brought to you by discord, this post, eye rolls at the internet, and my evidently broken brain.

Jegulus, 1300 words.

Continued under the cut. Warnings for absolute crack and very bad sex.

There were many challenges to a world where you could only have sex with strangers born at the same time as you. For one thing, it meant the exact time of your birth, and sometimes birth certificates were wrong. You could go years thinking you were born at 6:24am and find out one day that it was actually 6:23am. (Thank god for parents that looked at the clock instead of your head when they heard that first cry.) The bigger challenge though was just how hard it was to meet strangers, and keep them strangers long enough to get through it.

James knew it would be worth it one day. He ignored the horror stories of those soulmate meetings and preserved. He’d meet his soulmate and have sex one day, he just knew it. And if it was as bad as everyone said? Well, that was alright! It was still better than never having the experience at all.

James was careful too, to ignore the whispers of those around him who said there was another way. That you could have sex with someone who wasn’t your soulmate…someone who wasn’t born at the same time as you. Someone a day, or even more older or younger! Someone who you knew. Even, James shuddered to even think about it, but he’d heard of someone having sex with a friend. And then they stayed friends. But he was careful. He knew they were very wrong for doing those things and he could be patient and do it right.

He took all the proper precautions and steps. The first thing James did when he saw an unfamiliar face was to ask them for their birthday. His parents had great stories of James as a small child, yelling across crowded streets for everyone to say their birthdays, just in case. It was always exciting when someone said a date other than March 27th, because it meant he had met someone he could be friends with, and James loved friends more than anything. But James thought it would be exciting too, when someone finally did say his birthday, just for a different reason.

He was not prepared for his best friend ever, the best friend he could ever have in the whole world, to say that date. Thankfully Sirius had a different birthday. James had asked, first thing when he met Sirius of course, and Sirius had said his birthday was November 3rd. James now kept a close ear out for that date on Sirius’ behalf, of course. But James had not thought to ask Sirius about his siblings’ birthdays and it had been…weeks into their friendship before Sirius had thought to mention it.

James had screamed, fainting on the spot when Sirius mentioned his brother’s birthday was March 27th. He said it like it was nothing; evidently he had forgotten James’ birthday. 

(Sirius didn’t really believe the soulmate hype, despite James’ attempts to explain the situation. James hadn’t given up yet; he was just keeping his fingers crossed that Sirius hadn’t already met his soulmate by accident. It was a bit of a disaster waiting to happen.)

When James woke up from his fainting spell to Sirius anxiously staring at him and shaking his shoulder, frantic, he interrupted Sirius’ pleas to know if he was feeling alright to yell “what time! What time was your brother born!” Sure enough, it was an exact match. 

James had found his soulmate.

From then on, James would run out of the room with his ears covered anytime Sirius mentioned his brother. He couldn’t be too careful; they needed to remain strangers until they were ready. Sirius struggled to understand the problem; Remus was much more receptive to James’ woes. Remus had stayed up with James for many a sleepless night as James cried.

“What if I already know too much? I know his last name, I know his brother so well. Do we even still count as strangers? What if Sirius is telling him about me when he’s home? What if I’m not a stranger to him anymore?”

“There, there, James.” Remus would say each time. “It’ll be alright. No one has to know if you’re perfect strangers or not. You can always lie.”

James would cry harder at that. Eventually, he’d always fall asleep that way. Remus knew just what he needed.

Finally, as his 25th birthday approached, James decided he was ready. 25 was the golden age after all, sooner would have been wrong, but if he waited much longer…well 26 was certainly too old. That’d be very wrong.

James asked Sirius to introduce him to his brother. Sirius, who had been speaking to Regulus about this for years now, agreed and set up a date and time for them to meet. Regulus confirmed he was ready too. Sirius offered to give them each other’s phone numbers, but both men had cried and screamed at the idea. Nothing had convinced him before, but Sirius now saw it was clear that these two men were soulmates.

The day they had selected arrived and James spent hours setting up the perfect atmosphere in the hotel room he had booked for the occasion. Finally, there was a knock at the door. It was time. Regulus had arrived.

James answered the door to find the man of his dreams. He was gorgeous. Skinny, pale, with dark hair and light eyes, and clearly, exactly the same age as James. It was incredible how obvious the age similarity was, even at first sight. This was his soulmate. James felt tears in his eyes.

“Hi, I’m Regulus.” Regulus murmured as he stepped through the doorway and removed his shoes, looking a bit shy.

“Shh,” James shushed him. “We have to be careful, don’t say too much. My perfect stranger soulmate.”

Regulus only smiled, clearly overcome with agreement.

They made their way silently to the bed and removed their own clothing efficiently. Then, they sat at outside ends of the turned down bed, flaccid cocks on display as they hesitated, equally unsure of the next step.

“We might have to speak a bit now…” Regulus suggested.

“Alright, just don’t tell me anything about yourself.” James replied firmly.

“Of course.” Regulus agreed.

“Should we kiss? And then…I am prepared, I did bring lube.”

“Oh, good. Yes, let’s try that.”

They pressed their faces together harshly at first and then more gently when they seemed to mutually find their noses were a bit too smooshed. Eventually, they managed to find just enough of a rhythm to encourage each other to hardness. They shifted around until they were laying on their sides, facing each other and lips still pressed together between gasping breaths. 

“We should move a little closer I think,” Regulus suggested.

“Uh, yes. Here, lube!” James replied with an enthusiastic squirt of the bottle over first Regulus’ cock and then his own.

“Thanks, I think.” They exchanged a tentative smile, before pressing their bodies against each other and resuming clumsy kisses. 

“Are we…doing this right, do you think?” James asked Regulus after a moment.

“I don’t know. I’ve never done it before, obviously.”

“Oh of course not. Me neither, obviously. Well, um, let’s try, maybe moving?”

“Yeah, yes, please.”

They awkwardly and clumsily pushed against one another, the lube James had generously poured rubbing all over their stomachs. Communicating mostly in a series of grunts, they eventually found an acceptable rhythm and came one after the other.

“Gross,” they both sighed under their breath at the exact same moment as they rolled away from one another. They made brief eye contact and laughed tightly.

“Soulmates, I guess.” Regulus remarked.

James nodded with a grin. “You can shower first.” James offered, ever the gracious host.

Regulus thanked him and moved away to shower and dress quickly. James did his best to clean up and pull his clothes back on, anxious to be dressed when Regulus was done showering, ready to put this whole ordeal behind him.

Finally, Regulus walked out, dressed and already headed for the door. “Well, goodbye, soulmate.”

“Goodbye, soulmate.” James breathed a sigh of relief as the door shut.

It was finally over.

[sitp-recs]

*posting this way too early to make sure she'll will get to see it today hihi*

Happy happy birthday @shiftylinguini! I wanted to do a little something to celebrate one of the coolest, most talented HP authors out there. Sami is literally the coolest. Anyone who knows me at this point has realized that horny smut and clever humor are the way to conquer my heart. And Sam delivers both - and also plots! Character development! Drama and romance! - masterfully. Fuck buddies, Auror partners, A/B/O, established relationship, triads, age gap (my beloved!), you name it. She’s written it all, with impeccable dialogue and UST.

Sami, I’ve been following your works for quite a few years now and they never fail to impress me with your unique and hilarious sense of humour, your charming and vibrant characters, the A+ banter and domesticity, the clever plots, the lush sexual tension, witty dialogue and above all, unfailing emotional resonance. You build charged yet playful atmospheres like no one else and I’m especially grateful for your iconic takes on creature fic and A/B/O, two tropes that never interested me much until I found Embers and became utterly obsessed with it.

Your fics have shaped my Drarry experience and appreciation for rare pairs over the years and I'm sure I'm not alone; I don’t think you even realize the impact or how seminal your works were to some of us. You’re both a Drarry and rare pair champion, which is why I wanted to take some time and give your phenomenal catalogue a shoutout by highlighting my all-time favorites. I hope you have a lovely birthday knowing how appreciated you are by all of us! Sending lots of love and wishing you a fantastic year ahead, my friend 💙

Safe (M, 2k) - Harry/Sirius

He’s not James, Sirius tells himself as Harry gets into bed with him on a cold Monday night. He’s not James, but Sirius is not Padfoot anymore either.

Toeing the Line (E, 3k) - Drarry + Teddy

Draco wasn’t sure why watching his partner fuck Teddy until he screamed was somehow less morally iffy for Harry than just doing it himself, but Draco wasn’t about to judge. Not when he was balls deep, anyway. Read my rec here.

(Don’t) Behave (E, 3k) - Teddy/Charlie

Teddy is a bit of a mess, and Harry is at his wits’ end with his eighteen-year-old godson. Sending him to Charlie, thinking the older man could knock some sense into the kid, seemed like a great idea.

Sardines (E, 4k) - Scorbus + Jeddy

It’s bad enough his cock is hard from listening to the impromptu midnight pornography of his brother getting off; Albus is not going to add seeing it to the list of reasons why he lost his mind, and presumably his eyesight, on the eve of his grandmother's seventieth. Read my rec here.

A Noir Cliche (T, 4k) - Drarry

Draco is not a Healer. Harry doesn’t get hurt on purpose. They really have to stop meeting like this. Read my rec here.

Five Years (M, 4.7k) - Drarry

For Draco, December means finding somewhere he can lose himself in the thrum of a crowd and the throb of music ― and Potter. It always means Potter now, too. Read my rec here.

Float (E, 5k) - Drarry

After a night out, Harry wakes up feeling like he slept on concrete, like his body's made of sand, like he accidentally pissed on his housemate the night before. Because he did accidentally piss on his housemate the night before.

Splat (E, 5.8k) - Albus/James

Of all the things to happen to them, this is truly, truly the last thing James expected. Cw: incest, mild gore

Up The (E, 7.5k) - Drarry

“I feel I need to point out,” Draco kissed gently over Harry’s Adam’s apple, “that this is the most Gryffindor approach to conception that could possibly exist.” Or: Harry's had madder ideas.

forget what I need, give me what I want (and it should be fine) (E, 8k) - Draco/James

But even on those nights when the club is mad with punters and there are staff running ragged from one end to the other, Draco doesn’t need to be working behind the bar ― he just likes it.

Service Bell (E, 8k) - Drarry

Draco is: a werewolf, living in a cabin in the woods, minding his own business, and never going to buy plaid because he's not that much of a fucking cliche (yet). He's also counting down the days until he sees Harry again.

Teeter (E, 10k) - Drarry

Draco wants to come, Harry has other ideas, and they both might be doing this whole 'casually sleeping together' thing a bit wrong.

Hallo Spaceboy (T, 10k) - Jeddy

James’d had to give up on the eyeliner after that; he was grinning too hard, flushed and happy and basking in Teddy’s attention (fit blokes, we’re fit blokes, that’s us), and he couldn't bloody stop. Or: James kissed Teddy last night. This may or may not be the end of the world.

Team Players (E, 15k) - Jeddy + James/Oliver

Everyone has that one celebrity they’d move heaven and earth to get between their legs, and James Potter is no exception. He just never anticipated that number one on his Freebie List would end up in the same room as him, let alone would make the first move. Read my rec here.

Darling, Don’t Think Twice (E, 18k) - Harry/Teddy

Leaving the Aurors, and then England, after his divorce with Ginny was finalised was the best thing for Harry, and for Ginny, too ― but not for the godson who worshipped the ground he walked on. Now that he’s back, all Harry wants is to set up his own place, and to spend time with Teddy as he tries to fix their fractured relationship.

Celestial Bodies (E, 20k) - Drarry

“An astrological anomaly induced bond,” Harry repeats, deadpan, as the Head Healer of the Magical Malfunctions ward finishes announcing his prognosis. “Space magic,” says Draco, tapping long fingers irritably against the arm of his chair. “You’re saying we’ve been zapped by space magic.”

Two Weeks (E, 22k) - Drarry

If Harry had to guess which out of he or his Auror Partner, and tentative new friend, Draco Malfoy, would turn out to have Veela ancestry, his answer would be: neither, because that is ridiculous.

Midnight in the City of a Hundred Spires (E, 25k) - Drarry

Harry Potter is a missing person. Draco Malfoy is a vampire. They are the last two people one would expect to bump into each other in a Creature Bar in Prague, yet to Draco’s absolute shock that is definitely Harry fucking Potter sitting across from him.

Embers (E, 41k) - Drarry

Werewolf Alphas aren't meant to be alone, or to suppress their ruts indefinitely like Draco has been since he was bitten eight years ago. He needs company, companionship, to knot ― he needs an Omega Heat Companion. Read my rec here.

Heartlines (E, 72k) - Drarry

Harry never expected he’d end up chipping away at his virginity while wandless and bonded to Malfoy in Northern Europe. He never expected that would turn out to be the least surprising thing to happen while out on their training expedition in the middle of nowhere, either. Read my rec here.

[eastwindmlk]

For the last day of Jilyweek we arrive at the continuation station and a little post-canon moment from Echoes of Tuning Heart (Which is my band!AU fic, if you didn't know.) No prior knowledge needed! Thank you to @kay-elle-cee and @sunshinemarauder for making this happen! Oh yeah and it is 1.2k

3:57

Usually, Lily would be asleep by now. They left the venue two hours ago, and she had fairly quickly curled up in her bunk. But tonight she was on a mission, having set an alarm for the right time and silencing it the moment that it went off. Carefully sliding open the little curtain. She left her socks for what they were as she crossed over to James’s bunk. Finding him asleep. His light was still on and his glasses pressed into his face at an awkward angle.

Carefully, the redhead slid the glasses off his face. Cringing as he turned to his back, the leg almost poking him in the eye.

“James.”

Her voice was no more than a loud whisper as she carefully shook his shoulder. He smiled while he grumbled and groaned, but turned to his side while opening his eyes. Watched his hand wipe over his face, rubbing at the pressure marks along his nose and temple.

“Is it time to get up already, kitten?”

The little pet name slipped from his lips, much to her annoyance. Her eyes narrowed at him for just a moment.

“No, no you can go to sleep right after this again.”

She promised, her hand caressing his cheek as she stretched up onto her toes to kiss him. She hoped very much the bus would not be taking any stranger turns or bumps while she tried to balance.

“Happy birthday, darling.”

His face seemed to light up, and he leaned closer to kiss her. Their noses smashed together awkwardly as the bus pulled into a truck stop. Both of them laughed quietly in the darkness.

“I can’t wait for that layover tomorrow. I don’t mind a bed for a change.”

“You are impossible. Go back to sleep before you get any ideas.”

Unable to keep herself from flustering at the thought, her eyes looked into the darkness for a moment. Kissing him one more time before heading back to bed.

10:00

The whole bus woke up from a phone ringing, a chorus of groans and grumbling rising from all the bunks. The generic sound cutting off suddenly. Immediately followed by Sirius’s voice complaining:

“Whoever that is, I hate you!”

A brief silence where people tried to hear who was on the other side of the line. Lily had already poked her head out from the curtain to hear better. Listening to James greet his mother.

22:00

With the US tour, came a lot more helping hands. What also helped was that they were playing at the same venue two nights in a row. Allowing Lily to dip out a little early to prepare her birthday surprise for James. Leaving the end of the show and the meet-and-greet in their hands. It wasn’t anything they needed her for.

Instead, she used the hour or so making sure that their hotel room was candle-lit, having a little indoor picnic ready for when he finally made it up there. She took her time to make it look just right, down to the cheesy flower petals strew across the bed as a finishing touch.

The redhead was still in the bathroom, braiding her hair and leaning close to the mirror to check her make-up. She was dressed up in a set of purple satin lingerie. Something she had sneaked ti tge register when James had been distracted with other things. It pinched a little under her arm, but she doubted that she would be wearing it long enough to be bothered by it.

The door opened when she was fiddling with one of the straps. Feeling a warm, pleasant nervous feeling pooling in her stomach. Looking at herself in the mirror Lily decided that she would need a moment longer to gather courage.

“I’ll be right out! Why don’t you get comfortable?”

She called through the door, the footsteps carrying on into the room. Giving her a moment longer to take a deep breath. Lily wasn’t shy, not normally. But there was something different about putting herself purposefully on display.

So, she hyped herself up flicked off the unflattering light of the bathroom and stepped out. Taking two steps and practically shrieked.

“Sirius! What the hell are you doing here?”

Desperately searching for something to cover herself up with, glaring daggers at the man lounging on her bed. Wrapping her arms around herself, she leaned against the wall. Hoping that it would swallow her up. Her face now matched her hair in shade.

“Come off it, Red! You’re making this more awkward than it needs to be.”

Lily was about ready to strangle him. Seeing him lying there, lounging on the bed between the flower petals. He really was aggravatingly pretty. If only he did not have that shit-eating grin plastered over his smug face.

“I just came to check on you since you weren’t there when we got off-stage. Thought maybe you were sick.”

The fact that he had a wholesome excuse for being there only made it worse. She could absolutely not strangle him for this. Instead, she fought a smile onto her face, stepping away from the wall with her arms still clinging around her for a semblance of modesty.

“How did you even get in?”

Lily hissed, pretty sure that he should not have a key and dreading the idea that he took James’. She could not imagine having to open the door for him, dressed like this.

“Asked at reception, they let me in.”

Of course they did. Just as she opened her mouth to send him out, the door swung open.

Turning around, looking like a deer in the headlights Lily watched James step inside. His hair was still damp from the shower after the show, the room key between his lips while he strode in. Taking several seconds to notice anyone. Looking up his eyes landed on Sirius getting off the bed first, eyeing him confused.

“Pads, what are you doing h…”

The sentence sputtered and cut short when his eyes landed on Lily. She felt even more awkward now. The entire thing not going as planned. There was no sexy entrance, no surprise. No. He spotted her looking shocked, crumbling together to cover herself up. All Lily could think was that she must look incredibly silly and very unattractive right then and there.

James swallowed, eyes flicking back to his friend who stood there beaming at him. His confused expression made her turn around only to see Sirius making motions as if he was showing off a prize on a TV show. Back to James who was rolling his lip between his teeth, his hand in his hair.

“I think it is time for you to go, mate.”

He muttered, lip tugging up into a slight smile. Eyes roaming her stature hungrily. Giving her quite the confidence boost. She felt good enough to unfold herself and lean against the wall in a pose she hoped looked good. Yelping as Sirius’s hand smacked her exposed behind in passing. Pausing to kiss her on the cheek with the words:

“You look amazing. Have fun!”

James got visually impatient looking at his friend. To the point where, as he paused to say something at his side, he grabbed the back of Sirius’s neck and pushed him towards the door.

“Yes, yes, have fun, be safe and don’t do anything you would do drunk. Now, piss off!”

The interaction made both Lily and him laugh as he waved frantically at them until the door slammed in his face. Her boyfriend turned around to face her with a deep breath in and a sigh out.

“So, how about we try this again?”

[shadowbriar]

Regulus Black - Supermassive Black Hole II

Pairing : (F/M) || Regulus Black x Selwyn!Reader Word Count : 6.4k Warning : Curse words. Arguments. Mention of blood and unconscious SH. Please let me know if I've missed anything else. Synopsis : A simple arrangement turned into an everlasting one as two naïve children try to figure out their heart. Notes : This is the longest fic I've posted yet, I hope you wouldn't be bored midway. If you'd like to be tagged for the next chapters, please comment or reblog so I can add you to the tag list. If you like this story and would like to support me, please visit my kofi page and perhaps get me a coffee?☕

↞ Part I

If there is ever a day that Regulus hated more than most it would this very day when she turned sixteen. The calendar sitting on his bedside table stood proud, almost looking as if it was rubbing its numbers on his face. He stares at it with bitter glare, knocking the innocent item off of its position. He need not anything to remind him of the dreadful day. He couldn't forget her birthday even if he tried.

And he painfully had, indeed, tried.

Now sitting at the Slytherin Common Room with a book that failed to distract his mind, Regulus tries to put out his most nonchalant veneer. The act often fools his two best friends so he wasn't much worried he'll be called out for it. The only thing he has to worry about now is the internal feud happening inside him.

He knew that being sixteen meant that she would have a long line of gentlemen waiting for her hand. The silly tradition carried by the families of Sacred 28 to marry their children and keep their blood line pure was something Regulus felt proud of once, yet now seem to have loathed it more than anything. His parents, though not as outspoken and eager as he expected them to be, have also mentioned their intention of finding Regulus a wife. However, given the fact that he's the second born, his parents' focus was still heavily weighing on Sirius. Something that he feels grateful about.

"I think I'll ask my parents about it when we get back home." Rosier said, his cheeks looking slightly red "My family might not be as close to the Selwyns, but we're not that shabby of a family. I could still shoot my shot with her, don't you think?"

Regulus tried to hide his clenching jaw, resting his hand to his neck as he gave a small nod.

"Yeah, you'll do just fine." Crouch says, encouraging his friend "So long as Regulus here doesn't make his move, I'd say you're the only promising contender there is. I mean, who else is she going to marry? The Lestranges are old, Bulstrodes are a bunch of twats, and I doubt her family would let her marry a Malfoy. Their cocky selves would be the last thing the Selwyns would want for their only daughter."

"My brother is still out there, unbetrothed." Regulus says, eyes still glued on the leaves of his book "He could court her."

Crouch scoffs, "Highly doubt it."

"Why?" Regulus asks, this time looking up to see his friend's reaction "You don't think Sirius is decent enough to marry her?"

"Your brother doesn't like her like that, Reg." Crouch says "If he does he would've courted her a long time ago. You Blacks have been close to the Selwyns for years. If he ever had any interest in her he would've made his move already and yet, he hasn't."

Regulus remains silent. The arguments Crouch gave only made him want to punch the wall harder. As logical as his reasoning is, Regulus certainly did not need Crouch to entertain Rosier's intention. A sense of resentment is brewing inside him whenever he hears Rosier compliments or merely talks about her. He knew full well the extent of admiration his best friend has for her and yet he still hates it. No matter how genuine Rosier's feelings is, no one can advance with her.

No one but him.

He knew just how much of a coward and selfish bastard he was, for loving someone in silence yet acting as if he barely recognised her. But this persona is all he's known for years. This act is the only one he could put out around her. Perhaps this bitterness stems from the jealousy over how easy it is for his brother to be close with her, to make her laugh and cry in happiness. Growing up together meant that he’d seen first hand how things went with ease for her and Sirius and he couldn’t help but to feel envious about it. Regulus loves his brother dearly, just not when he's around her.

"Right, so it's settled then." Rosier said triumphantly, catching Regulus' attention once more "Now let's all pray to the seven hells that no one is sweet talking her parents yet."

Rosier's words set Regulus' skin ablaze. Sure, Rosier is a decent man, someone with a bright future who came from a respected family, but Regulus couldn't help but feel far superior to him. If only he could shed just a layer of his ego and talk to her, give barely half of the effort Rosier was so determined to do, he knew that he would have a bigger chance of being with her.

But is that what she wants? Would she want him to advance with his feelings? She's never shown any comfort whenever he's around. If anything, she looks like she was tormented whenever she breathed the same air as him. She was never as free and casual compared to when Sirius was around, so what exactly would be his one safety net that she would not reject and stomp his heart to the ground?

The noise of her friends congratulating her as she arrives at the Common Room made Regulus look up. An unconscious smile tugs in the corner of his lips, watching her being overwhelmed with the attention and congratulatory greetings. He wonders if there would ever be a time when he could be one of those people, surrounding her and celebrating her birthday with no awkwardness nor worry poisoning his brain.

Regulus could feel the couch shifted on his side. Rosier was already on his feet, approaching her with a nervous gesture. He greets her, wishing her a happy birthday before pulling her for a hug. Regulus scoffed, since when were those two close?

Trying to diffuse the anger boiling inside, Regulus turns back to his book. It was to no use, he knew it. There's nothing in this world that could distract his mind from her and the not subtle approach Rosier is taking but he couldn't show his jealousy. It's not like she was hers to begin with.

He could hear how Crouch begins to talk about her possible betrothal and Regulus has to gather every willpower to not stand up and deck his friend. He wanted them to shut up, both Crouch and Rosier. And it didn't help that Crouch tried to involve him in the conversation, asking his opinion about how the three of them could be her eligible bachelor, which of course Regulus could only answer with a hum.

“Don’t you want to say happy birthday to Selwyn, Regulus?” Rosier asked.

Regulus sighs before putting his book down and looking up. He wanted to take her hand and steal her away from his friends, as furthest as they could go. Now that she’s standing next to Rosier, he could see just how plausible their reunion would be. Though he’s still much better than Rosier in plenty of disciplines, Regulus has to admit that his best friend is an appropriate suitor for her.

And so he forced a smile, “Happy birthday.”

“Thanks.” She replied short, not showing any sense of impression “Now if you’ll excuse me, I have somewhere else to be.”

Regulus averts his eyes back to his book, hiding the slight disappointment of her sour response. Perhaps he could’ve been more friendly with his words or be more genuine with his smile, but it’s hard to show his true intention when the two people he wanted to hex to death were standing on her side. He wanted to slap the smug off of Crouch’s face and push Rosier away from her. The sight of her being close to the opposite gender irritates him to the bone.

The words he’s reading suddenly make no sense, evaporating into thin air before it could ever be registered in his brain. He wonders if she was going to meet Sirius. What kind of gift has his brother prepared for her? Would she pull his brother for a hug after he handed it to her? If Regulus were to give her a present himself, would she have accepted it? Would she respond to him the same way she would to Sirius?

Regulus let out a small sigh. All these questions feel like a labyrinth with no exit. Every wonder, what ifs and scenarios running across his mind had turned into a new form of air that though it hurt him, Regulus couldn’t imagine passing a day without it. If only he could read her mind.

—-

Regulus has been running around the castle for almost half an hour now. His skin was covered in sweat, cheeks slightly red from exhaustion. He runs his hand through his hair, feeling rather desperate to find his brother. He needs to make haste before things get a little bit too late for him to salvage.

“Sirius!” He called, running to his brother who was still in his quidditch robe “We need to talk.”

“Later, Reg.” The older boy dismissed “I need to take a shower first.”

“Now.”

Sirius stares at his younger brother strangely. The state Regulus was in was making him alert. Regulus has never looked so unkempt. His eyes were pleading, something Sirius hasn’t seen in a very long time. Understanding the urgency, Sirius nods and follows his little brother to the quieter side of the quidditch field.

“You need to marry Selwyn.” Regulus said with no warning.

“What?” Sirius responded in surprise, widening his eyes “What are you talking about?”

“You need to ask for Selwyn's hand in marriage.” Regulus repeated, his eyes still showing the same despair “I’ll help talk to Mother and Father though I know they would have no problem with you marrying her. We have to owl them fast-”

“Wait, hold on. Where are all these coming from?”

Regulus seethes, hopelessness bleeding out of him, “It doesn’t matter where it’s coming from. What matters is you’re marrying her.”

“I’m not going to marry Selwyn just because you told me to!” Sirius argues, feeling confused and lost at his brother’s urgent demand “What in the bloody hell is going on, Regulus?”

Regulus wanted to pull every single strand of his hair off of his scalp. He paces back and forth, biting on his fist. He knew just how frenzied he’s looking right now. The bewildered look on Sirius’ face is a clear sign of how mental he’s become. If only he could be transparent to his brother.

“Rosier is going to ask for her hand.” Regulus said, trying to gather his composure “He’s owled his parents to talk to hers. I heard him talk to Crouch earlier and from the look of it, it seems like the Selwyns are giving him a green light.”

“Right.” Sirius squinted his eyes, still not following the apocalyptic reasoning behind Regulus’ actions “What’s the problem with that?”

“The problem with that, Sirius, is that Rosier is going to marry Selwyn!” Regulus yells in despair “How can you stand there and ask what’s the problem with Rosier wanting to marry her? It’s Selwyn! How can you let her marry Rosier?”

Sirius shakes his head, completely lost as to where the conversation is going, “What’s so bad about Rosier? Isn’t he one of your pals?”

“Yes, he’s one of my closest friends but that’s beside the point, alright! The point is that Selwyn can’t marry Rosier.”

“So she should marry me?”

Regulus nods, “Yes, she should marry you.”

“Why?”

Regulus closed his mouth, trying to find the right words to utter.

“Why should I marry her, Reg?”

“Because she likes you.”

Sirius raised his brows, “And how do you know this? Did she tell you herself?”

“No.” He answered, feeling cornered “Look, I can’t give you the answer you’re looking for but you have to marry her, alright? She can’t marry Rosier or any other guy. Just- Just marry her, Sirius, please.”

Sirius stares at his brother with a perplexed expression, still trying to make sense of the words he’s just uttered. None of it was making any sense. Why would it be so bad for her to marry Rosier? What’s so wrong about him? And why does it have to be Sirius to be the one to marry her instead?

“Look, brother,” Sirius sighs, coming close to him and places a hand to his shoulder “I understand that you care about her, I do too, but this doesn’t seem to be something we should meddle with. Whoever she or her parents choose has nothing to do with us.”

Regulus remains quiet.

“Honestly, Regulus. If you don’t want to see her marry anyone else then why don’t you go ask her to marry you? Why do you have to point fingers at me?”

Sirius’ question felt like an arrow piercing through his chest. Of course he’s thought of marrying her, to be the one asking for her hand. To marry her would be a dream come true for Regulus. The idea of waking up in the morning beside her, spending their lazy days, and growing old together was something Regulus would kill to achieve. But given their history, such a dream feels too good to be true and if there is anyone who could make her happy, it would be Sirius, not Regulus.

“I can’t make her happy.” Regulus reasoned, his voice barely above a whisper “But you can. I’ve never seen her more joyful than when she was with you. Don’t you think she deserves to be with someone who could make her happy?”

“Regulus,” Sirius sighs, trying his best to give an understanding to his panicked brother “I can’t make her happy the way a husband should. And I agree with you, she deserves someone who could make her happy. She deserves much more than that, but that person isn’t me. I’m not the one she should be marrying.”

The younger boy remained quiet. Sirius doesn't understand the severity of the condition they’re in. How could he stand there and not feel the slightest terror of the chance of her marrying the wrong man? Doesn’t he want what’s best for her? And what would’ve been best for her if not Sirius?

“Regulus-”

“So you won’t marry her?” He cuts Sirius’ words “You’re not going to ask her to marry you?”

Sirius frowns, shaking his head, “No.”

“Fine.” Regulus nods, turning his heels.

“Regulus, where are you going?” Sirius shouts, his words not welcomed by his brother “Don’t do things you’ll regret later, Reg!”

Regulus’ steps are now filled with seethe. He’s never felt more angry and disappointed at Sirius than he is right now. Worry is still poisoning his mind, making his head turn hazy. She can’t marry Rosier, he can’t make her happy. What does he know about making her smile? Does he even know what her favourite flowers are? Regulus highly doubts it. But if Rosier isn’t good enough, then who else could court her?

—-

“Selwyn, a word.”

Regulus licks his lip in nervousness. The strange look she’s showing was watering his confidence. Well, it wasn’t exactly confidence that’s making him bold enough to approach her. However, a second ago he still had the slightest assurance that, at the very least she would say yes to the proposition he’s going to offer. Now, he wasn’t so sure.

Once he sees that she is getting up from her seat, Regulus quickly turns on his heels and leads her outside. His heart was beating fast. The fastest he’s ever felt and he fears that it would give up any second now. He tries his best to maintain a decent composure, curling his fists into a ball as he tries to piece coherent words into his head. For someone who’s always been articulate, Regulus has now found himself at the loss of words.

“Will you spill your words or am I only being called to watch you pace back and forth, Regulus?” She says with a baffled expression “What is it, is everything alright?”

“Date me.”

Regulus wanted to facepalm himself. The two words rolled out of his tongue unexpectedly. He could’ve given her a head start, give her one or two sentences of explanation before heading straight to his proposition. But what exactly can he explain to her? That he’s desperate and scared that she would marry someone else? That he’s scared she would end up and marry Rosier? No, he can’t say that. It would only ruin the very least strands of friendship they have.

Her mouth was agape, eyes widened as he stared at him as if he’d just grown an extra limb, “Come again?”

“Please don’t make me repeat it.”

Despair was apparent in his eyes. He could only hope that she could see through his strugglesome self that couldn’t fully express his true intention and say yes. He prays that his eyes could tell her everything his mouth could not utter. They’ve been close for years, surely she could tell one or two things about him better than anyone else.

“Yeah, not funny, Regulus.” She says, rolling her eyes “Is this some kind of silly bet you made with Rosier or Crouch?”

Regulus’ jaws tensed at the mentioning of his friends, “No.”

“Then why exactly would you come to me and say those words?”

“Because I like you.”

His mouth felt dry right after he laid out his cards. Sure it wasn’t the most romantic way to express his feelings, but it was as good as it could get. It was the most honest reason he could give her. He likes her. Perhaps a little bit too much for it to ever be healthy. He wanted to tell her that it was her that he would always think of last before he drifted off to sleep and the first he would think of when he opened his eyes in the morning. But given the circumstances, perhaps he could dive in further with his details later when things are more within control.

Yet perhaps he wouldn’t be able to as she rolled her eyes and turned her heels, “I don’t have time for this, Regulus.”

Regulus gulped. His worst nightmare finally came true.

“So is that a no, then?” Regulus asked, stopping her pace “Do you not want to date me?”

“No, I don’t want to date you.” She says, turning herself back to face him.

“Why not?” His brows are now knitted, confused and looking slightly offended.

“Because, Regulus,” She answers with a long sigh of exasperation “Not everyone in this castle finds you attractive.”

Her words strike him down like lightning. As if the day wasn’t nightmarish already, she just has to continue and rub it on his face as she’s never seen him that way. What was he thinking? The confidence he once had was shredded, completely pulverised as she now stands by him with a nonchalant gesture. She was rejecting him and stomping his heart to the ground.

Regulus clears his throat, “So you have someone else you fancy then?”

She remains quiet, eyes still glued on his.

Right, of course. If he had to make a wild guess, that lucky git would be none other than his brother, he’s sure of it. The way Sirius is able to make her laugh must’ve been the principal cause. No one has ever been able to make her look as radiant and euphoric. What exactly could Regulus do to compete with that?

“Very well.” Regulus says, taking her silence as his confirmation “I’m sorry to have caused you some inconveniences. Let’s pretend the last twenty minutes didn’t happen.”

Unable to spend another second there, Regulus quickly turned and walked away. He could physically hear his heart breaking with each step. What exactly was he thinking? That she would just say yes and date him? In what universe would she ever reciprocate his feelings? She’s never looked at him twice, even when Sirius wasn’t around. The chance he was so confident to have was nothing but mere illusion. He’s never had a chance with her. Never.

—-

To say last night was agonising would be an understatement. Regulus couldn't sleep, knowing that he’s burned the bridges between them. He shouldn’t have said a word. He shouldn’t have asked her to date him. He shouldn’t have confessed his feelings. Now he’s got nothing left to keep. He was sure that she would never want to see him again, as if their limited interaction over the years wasn’t already tormenting him.

Sirius was right, he shouldn’t have done things out of haste. Now look at the damage he’s caused. There’s nothing left for him to safe, nothing for him to fix. He’s lost her completely over some dumb confession he could’ve done better at.

“Regulus,” She called, making her presence known “We need to talk.”

Regulus looked up, swallowing his saliva at the sight of her. He certainly didn’t expect her to find him at the library, breaking his train of thought of the disaster he caused yesterday, “About?”

“You know what about.”

He sighs and puts his book down, gesturing to her to proceed. Perhaps this is his chance to salvage whatever is left for him to pick up. Maybe he could come up with a better explanation that would save her from a marriage, especially from Rosier. However the look on her face was giving him signs that things would not go as easy as he would like it to be.

“What in the seven hells were you doing yesterday?” She snapped in a hushed volume “Were you drunk? Did someone spike you with some tonic?”

“No, I was fine.” He answers, not wanting her to think that his intention was anything close to some joke or silly prank “I only wanted to know if you wanted to date me, is all.”

“Why?”

“Because,” 

Regulus pauses, biting his lower lip as if debating to continue his words. Should he tell her the truth? Should he tell her that he fears of her marrying Rosier? But what would he answer when she asks why? That he loves her too much to see her be with someone that he knew wouldn’t make her happy? Would she believe his words? She didn’t even seem to be much convinced of his confession yesterday, what would make this one truth give a different outcome?

And so he resorted to the one thing he’s good at, lying, “My parents are arranging me to marry Greengrass.”

Her brows rose, stunned at the new information spilled.

“I was wondering if you’d like to date me so I can stall more time before a marriage happens.” He continued to lie, eyes not looking at her in an attempt to not have his false words caught “Sirius has made it clear that he has no interest in getting married soon, especially with anyone my parents chose for him, so my parents turned to me and arranged the marriage. They fear that I might rebel and follow my brother’s missteps.”

There was a brief silence. Regulus still wouldn’t dare to look up, afraid that one look of her would crumble his sheer veneer of lies. He could only pray that she would buy his lie and finally agree to date him. Even if it was a fake one and had to be based on lies, whatever it takes to stall time for her to get married, he would be up for it.

Though he isn’t sure how he would function with such distress.

“Then why did you ask me to date you?” She asks with a soft voice, perhaps trying to understand the situation better “Don’t you think that’s a bit cruel to ask a girl to be their girlfriend when he’s betrothed to another?”

“I thought we could pretend to date each other so my parents would call the arrangement off. I mean, it’s a good proposal, don’t you think? I know your parents must be planning for your arrangement too, so I thought we could just date and make them postpone the arrangements.” He continued, fabricating more lie that he knew would bite him in the arse one day “Assuming that you’re not ready for a marriage too, of course.”

“Then why didn’t you just say so? Why did you have to lie and say that you liked me?”

Regulus gulps, regret filling his eyes once more. Was it really that hard to believe that he really liked her? Even if he was really betrothed to another, it doesn’t diminish the fact that he really does like her. Perhaps the way he carried his words yesterday and the lies he’s giving right now was leading her to a different conclusion.

“So you don’t want to marry Greengrass?”

Regulus shakes his head slowly, “No, I don’t. And I don’t think I ever would want to.”

She taps her fingers to the wooden table. The sound of it was driving Regulus mad. Perhaps he’s taken it too far. He shouldn’t have uttered those lies. He should’ve just apologised and asked for her forgiveness. Who knows what those words would lead them now?

“Look, it was a foolish proposition, I understand. I don’t expect-”

“Fine,” She says short, letting out a long exhale “Let’s do it.”

Regulus raised his brows, “What?”

“I said, let’s do it. It’s a favourable offer for us both, so I’m game.” She says firmly, looking assured “But just so we’re clear, this is business strictly. No emotions, no feelings, what so ever. The second either of us catch it, we’ll tell it to each other and call it off, deal?”

No deal. How could he agree to such a proposition when he’s already so plastered over her? But this is as good as it could get. At least they could have more time to postpone a marriage and hopefully this would water down Rosier’s intention on marrying her. Or any other guy, really. Perhaps one of these days Regulus could muster the courage and ask her to be his wife genuinely.

“Don’t flatter yourself.” Regulus says as he takes out his hand for her to shake “Deal.”

—-

Regulus pulled her hand and led her to his compartment. He knew that Rosier and Crouch wouldn’t be joining them today. The news of them dating had spread like wildfires and Regulus could understand the hatred Rosier must be having right now. He quite literally steals his bird right under his nose. He hasn’t shared a word to Rosier and honestly had no intention to. All is well for Regulus so long as he has her by his side. The world could burn into ashes for all he cares.

“Have you owled your parents?” He asks as he takes a seat “Told them about us?”

She nods, “A couple of days ago.”

“And what did they say?”

“I don’t know, I haven’t opened their letters.” She shrugs, plopping into the seat in front of him “Reckon I could just witness their reactions first hand when we arrive.”

Regulus nods, not uttering another word.

He too hasn’t opened any of his parents’ letters. For some reason they have sent him more than the usual and he couldn’t be bothered to find out why. Regulus could only suspect that the news of him dating her was making his parents ecstatic. At least one of their sons is continuing the family tradition. 

Regulus glances at her who’s now looking out of the glass door, watching as students come in and look for their designated compartments. Her face lights up when she sees Sirius, waving at him with that big smile Regulus always feels envious about. Sirius grins back at her, only to have a sour expression when he sees him. He gave a small nod to Regulus before continuing his walk and following his friends away.

Of course his brother was pissed. He’s told Sirius about their fake relationship and as expected, Sirius was beyond angry at the news. He couldn’t believe how deceitful Regulus’ decision is, to limit her from finding her true match. If only Regulus would be honest to his brother about his true intention, perhaps Sirius wouldn’t be as angry and would understand where he’s coming from. Yet he didn’t and the half answered questions only made Sirius believe in the worst of him.

“What was that?”

“What was what?”

“You know what.” She says, sounding irritated “Must you really ask questions you know the answer to? It doesn’t make you seem cool, you know. It makes you look like a twat.”

Regulus rolled his eyes, “Why are you asking me? Ask Sirius, he’s the one who seems to have a problem with us being together.”

She shows an annoyed look before turning her eyes back outside.

Regulus licks his lower lip. The fake dating has certainly given them more interactions yet they’re far from how he would've wanted it to be. He knew that he could have acted less of an arse and been more open to her, but the guilt of keeping her so selfishly when it was clear that she didn't want to be anywhere close to him was eating him alive. Everytime she was by his side, the fear of her finding out that he was deceiving her would haunt him. He wouldn’t know what he would do if she ever finds out and hates him. He would rather cast himself the killing curse than to live with that pain.

“We have to talk about what to do during the break.” Regulus says, eyes still glued to his book so he wouldn’t have to see her and make him feel more guilty “I’ll owl you weekly and come to every parties and soirees your parents are holding. I suppose your birthday party is coming, right?”

She turns her head to him, eyebrows furrows, “Weekly? You think that would suffice?”

“I don’t owl anyone so a letter weekly is a luxury.” He said as he looked up to her “You can send me your letters as frequently as you want but know that I’ll only be replying once a week.”

“You’re impossible.” She scoffs, folding her hands in front of her chest “Daily. You are to owl me everyday. You tell me about how your day went, tell me how much you miss me, how much you miss holding hands with me, and you are to send me flowers. I like orchids, so send me those.”

Regulus remains quiet. Those wouldn’t be too hard to do, knowing that those things she said are the very thing he wanted to do each day. And she needed not to tell him what her favourite flower was, he knew. He knew about her more than he would be willing to say. Did she really think that he wouldn’t when he’s been so head over heels for her for years?

“Fine.” He says, closing his book “Any other request?”

She pursed her lips, contemplating, “We have to stop calling each other by our names.”

“What do you mean?”

“Couples don’t do that. They call each other by their pet names.” She explains “I mean that’s what my friends do.”

“I see.” Regulus nods slowly “I’ll call you motormouth.”

“Motormouth?” She asks, appalled “That’s not a pet name, that’s an insult!”

“Well if you learn to quiet down a bit we’ll upgrade to something more mediocre like Darling or Love.”

“Fine,” She spat in annoyance “Honey Puff.”

Regulus glares, “Don’t call me that.”

“Aw, does my dear lover hate to be called with cute names?” She taunts, faking a cute pout “Should we call you Pooh Bear instead?”

Regulus turns back to his book with a fake annoyed scoff. He could only hope that the strands of his hair that are now covering his face would be enough to hide the slight blush appearing on his cheeks. Sure he hates the pet name, but knowing that it was something he got to do with her warms his heart. Who would have known that the Regulus Black is actually such a softie on the inside?

—-

“What’s going on, Regulus?”

His brother’s whisper was making Regulus sweat, walking into the Selwyns’ Manor with colour draining from his face, “I don’t know.”

“Why are we here?” Sirius continues to ask “And why is the garden decorated as if someone’s about to get married?”

Regulus gulped. Is she going to get married? Did the plan not work? Is this why his parents have been sending him more owls? Not because of pride and happiness but because of shame that their son is dating someone who’s already betrothed to another?

The Black brothers were walking a few steps behind her, looking and studying the situation around them. A party is about to be held, just not the ones they would usually go to. Orchids were placed everywhere, her one favourite flower. Regulus could feel his breathing getting shorter in fear. Is this truly the end for them?

“Darling, welcome home!” Mrs. Selwyn greets, pulling her daughter into a warm embrace “It’s so good to see you, my love. And welcome Regulus, Sirius. I hope the journey back was pleasant for you, yes? Your parents are inside, preparing themselves.”

Regulus raised his brows, “They’re here?”

“Well of course they are! They wouldn’t miss their son’s wedding would they?”

“His what?” She asks in surprise, pulling away from her mother’s embrace “Who’s marrying who?”

“You, of course, you silly goose. You’re marrying Regulus.” Her mother teased, poking her daughter’s nose “Did you not read the letters I’ve sent you? Walburga and Orion thought that it would be best to hold the wedding now, seeing that the both of you are already dating, anyway. Your father and I thought the same. We’ve sent the both of you letters but neither of you replied, so we assumed that there was no rejection against the idea.”

Regulus remained quiet, trying to digest the unexpected news.

“My darling girl.” Her mother says warmly, looking at her daughter proudly before turning to Regulus with a warm smile “We didn’t need to put you two in an arranged marriage, after all.”

His eyebrows rose. Arranged marriage? Between him and her?

“I have to get back inside and make sure the catering is ready.” Mrs. Selwyn says before excusing herself inside.

The three children were still frozen, their souls sucked out of their body. The words come into one ear and exit the other with no remarks. His head was fuzzy, unable to comprehend anything that’s just been told to him.

“I’ll look for Mother and Father, see if they’ve got some better explanations.” Sirius says before getting inside the manor.

Regulus watched as his brother disappeared into the manor. His ears were ringing, feet light as if he was afloat. Only on the worst way possible. He couldn’t believe the reality he’s in. Just how great of a mess he’s caused for her.

She turned to him and called, “Regulus.”

“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” He cursed under his breath, rummaging his hair as he paced back and forth “What in the holly fuck is going on in our parents’ head?! We’re sixteen, for fuck’s sake! What exactly are they rushing for?!”

Regulus could feel his skin melting in despair. How did he let things get this severe? He only wanted to have more time, to keep her by his side just a little longer. What does the universe have against him that made his life this difficult?

“Regulus, quiet down.” She whispers, noticing the stares thrown at them “People are staring.”

“And you,” He turns, finger pointing at her “Why couldn’t you just open the bloody letters? We could’ve avoided this!”

“Me? How is it my fault? You were sent letters too and you didn’t know. I’m not the only party at fault for not being diligent with my post!”

Regulus clenches his jaws in anger. He lets out a small growl. He didn’t mean to blame her, he was just desperate is all. Yet of course as always he could only make her feel more uncomfortable around him. Just another thing to add to the list of what’s stressing him out right now.

His anger was quickly subdued when he turned to her, noticing that her excessive bite to her lower lip was making it bleed. It was one of the very detailed thing he noticed of her. Whenever she feels scared or unsure of herself, she would bite her lower lip until it bleeds and would have the least realisation of it. She would act as if such action was nothing, as if it doesn’t hurt her the slightest.

“Stop, that. Don’t hurt yourself.” Regulus says as he hands her his handkerchief “Stop mutilating yourself.”

She took the white cloth and pressed it to her lips, still not giving any care for herself, “What do we do know?”

“I don’t know.” Regulus sighs, feeling like he’s going to give in anytime now “I don’t think we could ever out mind our parents' wicked plans. They’re sick in the head, is what they are.”

“Don’t talk about my parents like that, I love them.” She argues, a slight pout evident on her face “Even when they’re being dickheads like this.”

Regulus smiled at the refreshing sight, yet such bliss only lasted for a second as he took a hard gulp, “So will you do it? Will you marry me?”

“Do I really have a choice?”

He mentally winces at her question. He hates the fact that she thinks she’s got no other choice but to marry him. He hated himself for putting her in such a situation, to give her no other option but to marry him though it’s obvious that she has no interest to do it. He hates himself to have forced her to marry him this way.

But Regulus knew that there’s nothing he could do to go against his parents’ decision. The marriage is already in motion and there’s no other way for him but to go forward. He could only pray that one day she would find the way to forgive him.

“Alright, let’s get married, then.”

↠ Part III

[londondziban]

London's Masterpost

About Me:

☆ Hi everyone! My name is London or Dziban. I’m a 19 year old fanfic writer who posts over on ao3 when I have time. I'm a gay trans man who uses He/They pronouns!

☆ Stranger Things is my special interest!

☆ Fandoms I'm (actively) in and may post about: Stranger Things, Six of Crows/Grishaverse, The Maze Runner, Ghostbusters, Marauders Era, Bridgerton, PJO, The Hunger Games, Arcane, Scream, and Shameless (US)

They are me, I am them:

☆ Mike Wheeler ☆ Wylan Van Eck ☆ Newt (tmr) ☆ Dipper Pines ☆ Eloise Bridgerton ☆ Wirt (otgw) ☆ Katniss Everdeen ☆ Jo March ☆ Suzuki Shou (mp100)

☆ PSA: I am currently taking two final courses for my A.A.-T in English and I am preparing to move six hours away for my remaining years of undergrad. I have some stuff in the works, but my time to write for fandom is pretty limited. Please bear with me

Dziban's Writing -

WIPs:

Apple Juice and Peach Oneshot. Elmax/Elumax, background Byler. Coffeeshop Au Sequel to And At Every Table, I'll Save You A Seat Wake Up Call Oneshot. Byler. Ghostface AU. Caller Will, Killer Mike

Stranger Things Fics:

Not Just Another Birthday M. 1/1, 6,245 words. Byler–Mike Wheeler is turning 18 and he has some thoughts about it. Trick or Treat! G. 1/1, 2,371 words. Byler–Bylerween day 6 You Reminded Me of Brighter Days G. 1/1, 3,565 words. Byler–Bylerween day 3. May be continued Why's the Music So Loud? (Take It To the Lawn Now) M. 1/1, 3,185 words. Byler–Bylerween day 2 The Only Time I Ever See Him (Is When He's Behind Me in the Mirror)  M. 1/1, 9,417 words. Byler–Bylerween day 1. May be continued When the Days Were Long and the World Was Small T. 1/1, 2,478 words. Byler & Jancy–the horrifying ordeal of being caught having snuck out...by your sibling who also snuck out I'm Fine With My Spite and My Tears, and My Beers and My Candles M. 1/1, 2,185 words. Platonic Madwheeler–Post UD/Vecna And At Every Table, I'll Save You A Seat T. 1/1, 10,982 words. Byler–coffeeshop AU Snap Out of It T. 1/1, 5,687 words. Byler–Mileven gets Murrayed You Take My Hand and Drag Me Head First M. 1/1, 7,362 words. Byler–Mike has always been protective of Will A Crooked Love in a Straight Line Down T. 1/1, 1,610 words. Byler–MikeWillEl can't kill a single spider Holding Me Closer 'Till Our Eyes Meet G. 1/1, 1,768 words. Byler–Mike band AU Why They Lost Their Minds and Fought the Wars G. 1/1, 2,544 words. Byler–established relationship, domestic fluff I heard that you fell in love or near enough M. 1/1, 8,301 words. Byler–Post UD/Vecna

Marauders Era/Harry Potter:

Kiss me! (Tonight?) M. 1/1, 9,773 words. Rosekiller ft. Jegulus –Every year during the last week before hols break, mistletoe gets conjured to hang above the heads of people with unspoken affection. What do you do when you look up and realize mistletoe has been conjured to hang between you and your best friend? Well, you can ask Evan Rosier. Shears Microfic. 1,058 words. Trans Regulus–Sirius helps Regulus with his first proper haircut, background Jegulus Peppermint Microfic. 1,103 words. Established Wolfstar–Sirius cares for a sick Remus, mentions of established Jegulus and Rosekiller

[amortentiainmyfirewhiskey]

|marrón pt.2|

post-azkanban sirius x reader

wc: +2k

Part: 1 pt.3

(Y/N) awoke to the sound of the kids stomping down the stairs, probably already dressed and having breakfast before leaving to go to Diagon Alley. She rolled out of bed and drug a tattooed hand over her face before looking at the clock that said 7:32 am. Oh hell no. There was no way in hell she was getting dressed this early, she didn't care who's house she was in. 

The (y/h/c) stood and glanced at herself in the old dresser's mirror, it wasn't like she was wearing anything inappropriate; she supposed the only thing Molly might frown on would be the fact you could see her thighs, that again, were covered in tattoos, but she didn't care.

There was no color in her tattoos, just skin and bold black ink. She had begun getting them officially at 16, if you didn't count the stick and pokes her and Vesta would give each other at thirteen during their time at Ilvermorny.

(Y/N) glanced at the faded shape of a penis on the inside of her elbow and grinned, they were fucking stupid, huh? Though the memory was light, her heart grew heavy at the reminder Vesta wasn't there anymore, somewhere better hopefully.

But how the hell would she know?

Not a moment later she trudged down the stairs and stopped in her tracks when her hand landed on the doorknob to the kitchen. She made sure to pull down her shorts as much as she could and fix her shirt to make sure her bra wasn't showing. I mean they were kids.

" Good morning, squad!" she announced as soon as she swung the door open. The occupants of the room jumped about a foot in the air and did a double take when they saw her. She knew it wasn't because she wasn't dressed for the day or something stupid like that, she knew it was because they had never seen her without a leather jacket or jeans.

Yeah, she had some pretty tattoos, but she had some that were a bit more colorful. Next to the roman numerals that represented Kumiko's birthday on her forearm was a simple drawing of a hand presenting its middle finger proudly. On her upper arm was a beautifully drawn compass pointing West in honor of Connor's last name, and underneath was 'SLUT' written in pretty cursive. She had plenty like that.

" Woah," said a once tired Tonks who now looked wide awake, " How many do you have?"

(Y/N) looked to the table to see all the room's occupants looking at her with astonished expressions. Her throat tightened and an anxious shiver shot down her spine, but she managed to compose herself and smirked, " Couldn't tell ya," she chuckled.

When was the last time this nonchalant way of acting felt normal? When was the last time her witty remarks made herself laugh? She couldn't tell ya.

Even in the morning Grimmauld place's kitchen felt cold, dark, and stuffy, " I've been getting them since I was sixteen, " she added grabbing a coffee mug.   " What's that one mean?" asked Mr. Weasley.

(Y/N) was surprised when he asked, and it looked like everyone else was as well. The older man had the decency to look a little embarrassed, " Well it's a creature I've never seen before!" he said defending himself with his arms crossed. (yn)'s nose scrunched up in confusion when it dawned on her what tattoo he was referring to.

She looked down at the old faded stick and poke she had forgotten about on the side of her right knee to see Woodstock, Snoopy's friend, staring straight ahead. She burst out laughing at the realization and when Hermione, Harry, and the other half-bloods figured out what she was laughing at they too joined in, leaving the purebloods confused and squinting at her knee.

After the commotion settled down, she plopped down next to Tonks and ate her share of breakfast as Mrs. Weasley rolled out the itinerary for the day. She could feel the teens glancing toward her every now and then, she was flattered by their curiosity but also a little disturbed.

A year ago, she would have gotten off on the attention but now she wanted to crawl under a rug rather than explain her life to a couple of teenagers. 

“ It must be interesting being an auror in the states,” said Ron finally, unable to contain his enthusiasm. 

She looked up from her eggs and shrugged, “ It was,” she began, “ But for the most part it was kind of a bummer,” 

The rest of the room driven by this response looked to her, completely ignoring Mrs. Weasley, “ How so?” asked Harry, practically on the edge of his seat. 

(yn) frowned and set down her fork, “ I was in the boroughs of New York, y’know Queens, the Bronx, Manhattan, Staten Island, and Brooklyn. You meet some people in some bad situations, but they’re not necessarily bad people.”

“ A lot of wizards and witches involve No-Mag’s in their business, a lot of No-Mag kids too. . .” she paused, thinking about the bastards who would replicate No-Mag money and pay kids to sell shit for them or be fucking mules for them.  

“ You can find a bunch of poor people in New York who are willing to do anything for money, just so they can eat or by some coke,” she paused and looked at Harry in particular, “ Anyone who considers being an auror has to be able to stomach some seriously horrific things,” she said, “ But if you can help one more person it’s worth it,” 

She tried to lighten the mood with a soft smile and a lighthearted story, “There was this one kid, Jake Mariano, he was a First-Gen, Muggleborn, he thought he could do telekinesis or something. He was stealing all sorts of things money, bikes, stereos, gum- anything. Kid thought he was slick until he tried to lift my cigarettes off me,” 

The teens seemed to feel better after she told them about how she smacked the kid upside the head and took him back to his mom who was about to call the government on him. He was now a second year at Ilvermorny and doing fine. 

So caught up in her story she failed to notice a hung over Sirius coming in, he stayed by the door and listened to her story. He watched as the corners of her lips tilted upwards and how her brown eyes melted as she spoke of the boy who she helped navigate his way into the magical world.

Sirius could tell she genuinely cared about the kid and the people she had helped, but what he couldn’t figure out was why she would quit doing something she so obviously loved. 

When (y/n) finished her story, she noticed him. Her eyes widened slightly and a bashful smile found its way to her face, “ Morning,” she said.

“ Morning,”

-

After the kids left her, Sirius, and Tonks were left alone until Remus came by to get Tonks for duty and then they were left by themselves. It was a weird silence, it wasn’t uncomfortable, but it wasn’t comfortable. Maybe tense was the word. 

It was a tense she was all to familiar with. It wasn’t aggressive or sad- this shit was sexual. 

The way his eyes would flick to her breasts before looking away quickly as if he were berating himself for doing so lit her the fuck up. But she wouldn’t let on that she noticed.

“ Nice story,” he said with a small smile, and she about combusted right there.

 (Y/N) shrugged, “ Nice kid,” she replied before taking another sip of coffee, “ What are you up to today, hm?” 

“ Jack shit,” he grumbled, his mood growing dark at once. This would usually throw someone off and have them shrinking back into themselves but (yn) just nodded.

“ Join the club,” she sniggered, “ Dumbledore is still feeling me out I guess you could say, they don’t trust me to go off on my own,” 

Sirius’s mood shifted once again, “ Yeah, couldn’t imagine why,” he said cheekily, “ Nothing odd like an ex-auror in a secret line of work agreeing to come across halfway across the world to work with a bunch of strangers,” 

The (yhc) laughed, “ You got a point there, Mr. Black,” she agreed silkily, looking at him through her dark lashes. 

Sirius raised an eyebrow in her direction. He knew she wasn’t saying mister as a sign of respect, she was flirting, and by God he was too. 

The morning was spent with talk of Ilvermorny and Hogwarts, both were careful not to mention friends and more sensitive topics. Sirius knew she understood why he didn’t mention his friends, but he couldn’t for the life of him understand why she didn’t mention hers. 

What happened to her? 

Who was she?

-

Later in the day she went out to pick up groceries for Molly and Sirius found himself sitting in the den, drink in hand smoking a cigarette. Remus came in and frowned at his choice of habit but said nothing, settling in the dark leather chair beside him.

The den like the rest of the house was decked out in green and silver, but instead of millions of portraits the walls were lined with bookshelves and a single cherry wood desk. 

“ Remus, what do you think of (yn)?” asked Sirius looking up at the werewolf.

The graying man sighed and rested his chin on his fist, “ I think she’s hiding things but nothing deatheater related-,”

“ Thank you!” shouted Sirius vigorously pointing to him with the hand that was holding his whiskey, “ What do you think it is? I mean-,”

“ -and,” interrupted Remus, “ I think she’s inappropriately interested in you.”

Sirius set down his glass and stared at Remus, “ Really?” he said, trying to keep the hopeful tone out of his voice but failing dismally.

Remus gave him a hard look and the pureblood deflated, “ Oh c’mon Remus!” he groaned, “ I wouldn’t touch her, scout’s honor!” he said placing his hand over his heart. 

Remus let out a long sigh, “ I will say she is very attractive, funny, but far too young,” he said pointedly

Sirus rolled his eyes and said nothing else.

-

After dinner everyone went into the living area and had a bottle of butterbeer or a firewhiskey, “ Okay okay,” laughed Ginny, “ Never have I ever jumped out of a window and onto a broom, “ 

The twins, (y/n), and Sirius threw back their drinks while the room, sans Molly laughed, “ When did this happen?!” she shouted with her hands on her hips while her husband chuckled behind his paper.

“ Mmmm second year,” said George, “ Something to do with Filch I believe,”

Fred nodded, “ Yeah, we put Mrs. Norris in an enchanted bucket, some elementary prank I do believe,” 

The room erupted with laughter once more and when (y/n) caught her breath she spoke, “ My friend and I pissed off one of the pukwudgies at school, Clarence, and Clarence starts shooting at us with his dud arrows to mark us. . .” she stopped at the rooms concerned faces, “ Let me clarify real quick, basically giving us a detention slip with an arrow that doesn’t pierce your skin,” The room let out a unanimous ‘oh’ and she continued, “ We had let a flock of geese in the main gym or something and we had the brooms waiting for us at the window- but the thing was Clarence had a southern accent,” she chortled.

“ He was like ‘ C’mon back ‘ere you lil piss aints!”’ she mimicked,” Oh God!” she gasped. 

The room laughed with her and a few minutes later Mrs. Weasley announced it was time for bed. The kids cleared out and soon Tonks and Remus were leaving for duty. 

Once again it was just the two of them, the only thing separating them was a cushion Tonks had been sitting on. They stared into the fire and drank.

“ You always say friend,” began Sirius, causing her head to whip around to look at him, “ You never say their name, why?”

He hoped he wasn’t overstepping but he couldn’t help himself, he wanted to know her so badly. But he didn’t know why, there were plenty of mysterious people in the order, maybe it was her charisma, or maybe it was the fact she seemed like him.

A shell of her former self. 

(Y/N) was silent for a moment, looking down at a tattoo that held music notes, “ Yeah. . . the one in the story was Stephen. . . Stephen Garcia,” she said with a tight smile, “ He was one of my bestfriends,”

Sirius felt his stomach drop, “ I’m sorry I shouldn’t-

“ No it’s okay, it felt good to talk about him,” she chuckled, “ He was one of a kind, they all were,” 

She looked around and flicked her wand at the door to lock it, “ Here, and don’t freak out I’m wearing a tank top,” she laughed when Sirius’s light eyes widened when she began lifting up her shirt. 

Her tattoos were as prominent as they had been in the morning, but now her (yst) was bathed in the warm light of the fire and Sirius’s mouth was suddenly dry as he beheld her form in front of him. 

“ The compass is for my friend Connor, his last name was West so it points that way,” she said pointing to her upper arm, “ And this one on my thigh is the chorus to Stephen’s favorite song,” she explained, “ And the arrow across my hip is for Vesta because she was a fucking badass with a bow,” she grinned slightly pulling down her joggers to show him. 

“ This one is Kumiko’s birthday with a big ole fuck you underneath because that bitch was small but she could put you in your goddamn place,” 

When she finished Sirius stood, placing his glass down, he got closer, “ They’re beautiful,” he said.

(Y/N)’s heart was hammering in her chest, “ Yeah they are,” she said meeting his eyes. The world seemed to stop for a moment before he placed his hand on her shoulder and drug his thumb across her collarbone and parted his lips slightly, “ And this one?”

She smiled. The one he was touching was her simple ‘1920′ tattoo, “ For the woman who raised me,” she murmured, allowing him to take a step closer and place another hand on her hip. 

(Y/N) was finding it hard to function and she wanted nothing more than for him to pull her to him and kiss her until she was gasping for air. She wanted him to take her over the goddamn ottoman, fuck the other people in this house she really didn’t fucking care. 

He hesitated when he was three inches from her face, “ I. . . I can’t,” he said reeling away and retreating to the door. Leaving her alone ...and horny. 

-

Taglist: @notyourfuckingbusinesss​

[tedwardremus]

My round-up of fics I posted last month

Completed

The Past is a Bucket of Ash

Over burnt photographs, Harry had a late-night chat with Sirius about his family history.

Know Your Roots

Albus Potter is unsure if helping Uncle Neville repot moonwort plants is part of detention or a lame attempt at godfather and godson bonding. It might be both.

I'll Meet You After Dark

An Alternate Universe where the Statute of Secrecy hasn't been enacted yet. Tensions between the magical and non-magical communities are high. Lily has been secretly learning magic against her family's wishes from the Potters who sell medical potions in town. Petunia wants Lily to marry a normal person in the village, but Lily has her eyes set on the attractive James Potter, who has just returned home from wizard school.

Does Permanent Mean Forever?

It is James Potter's seventeenth birthday, and to commemorate the occasion, he proposes to the gang that they go out and get tattooed.

Your Friend, James

It is the summer before their 7th year, and Lily and James spend the entire holiday writing letters to each other as their relationship slowly changes from friends to something more.

Works In Progress

Be Not Afraid Of Greatness

A collection of Frank Longbottom stories

Rage Against The Dying Of The Light

In a universe where James and Lily Potter survive Voldemort's attack on Halloween night. Most of wizarding society is enjoying newfound peace after a decade of war, except the young heroes who fought the war learn you can never really go back to the way things were before.