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crutchie-with-a-y · 4 years

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Hiya Sophie🥰 how are you? Could I please request Jack Kelly x reader where he’s being touchy and begging for them to love him but reader is busy with school so they don’t give him enough attention? And then Jack gets super quiet and when reader is done with hw, reader feels super bad about not giving Jack enough attention, they treat Jack with cookies they’ve made and talk about this and the two of them end up cuddling the whole night sharing sweet kisses. Jack lays his head on reader’s chest🥺

Hey! I’m doing pretty good, what about you? Thank you for the request! Sorry for the wait, I’ve been a little pre-occupied, but I hope this is something like what you had in mind! <3

“Haha, yeah we’ll see you later, Finch!” You laughed and waved as your friend said his goodbyes and turned down his street.

“Oh thank GOD he’s gone!” Your boyfriend, Jack, said as soon as Finch was out of earshot. You and him and about a dozen other friends always walked home after school together, one by one peeling off from the group as they reached their streets. Finch was the third to last to turn onto his street, which left you and Jack to walk the rest of the way to your homes, (which is actually how you started dating in the first place). Jack, who was usually happy to have friends around, had seemed restless to get away from the group today, and once he was positive Finch couldn’t see or hear you, he pinned you against the stone wall the two of you were passing on the sidewalk. He passionately kissed you and for a moment you completely lost yourself in his rough lips that tasted of cherry coke and the cigarette he had shared with Race at lunch. Then you reminded yourself that you had some homework to complete and a test to study for.

“Jack,” You gasped when he pulled back for air and began to nibble at your ear. “Jack, Jack I don’t have time.” Jack pulled back without removing his hands from where they held your wrists against the wall and squinted at you.

“What are you talking about?” You snapped your wrists forward and glared at him as you began to walk again, him following at your side with the same look on his face.

“I have homework.” Jack stopped completely and you turned back to look at him.

“The fuck you don’t,” Jack said, obviously pissed at you, and that was rare, so it made you pretty uncomfortable, you had to admit. “You finished your math in class, you told me at lunch. Your history project isn’t due for a literal month and you’re already almost done with your poster. You wrote this week’s homework essay for English on Monday night.” He walked slowly, listing everything off on his fingers.

“Well there is more math,” You said defensively, as the pair of you turned a corner onto your block.

“More math? What the-oh my god the EXTRA CREDIT PACKET?!” He looked at you like you were insane and you bit your lip and looked at the concrete. “Y/N, you’re a straight-A student. You don’t need the extra credit. And even if you still wanted it ‘just in case,’“ He imitated you as he followed you up the stairs to your front door. “You literally have all semester to turn it in, and it’s FRIDAY. It’s FRIDAY! Can we not just relax and do couple things for ONCE.” He said, turning around to look at you while you shut your front door behind you. You glared at him. He KNEW how important school was for you and how much you stressed about getting all your work in on time, why was he being so rude about it?

“I also have science,” You responded, pushing past him and into your dining room to pull your laptop and textbook out of your bag and set on the table. Jack loudly threw his bag on the table in front of you and headed into the kitchen.

“Please tell me your kidding,” He said, popping open a can of Pepsi. You flipped through your textbook pages angrily, upset that he didn’t seem to get it.

“No, I’m not kidding.” You said sharply, only turning to look at him once you’d said it, just able to catch the sad, exhausted look on your boyfriend's face. You felt guilty, but before you could apologize, his face hardened again.

“Y/N I WAS UP TILL 3 AM YESTERDAY HELPING YOU WITH YOUR SCIENCE PROJECT. HOW DO YOU HAVE ANYTHING ELSE TO DO?” He yelled, which made you shrink a little as you typed your password into your laptop, but then your blood boiled.

“YES AND I AM GRATEFUL FOR THAT, BUT THERES A TEST ON MONDAY-”

“ON MONDAY?” Jack stepped up on the chair next to you and sat on the table and closed your computer in an attempt to get you to look at him, but you just crossed your arms and stared at the logo on the top of your computer. “Y/N, please, you can study all weekend for that, when your parents get back? Cmon, right now we have a little alone time and I really need-”

“Everything to be about you?” You whipped your head up to look at him. His eyes looked hurt, but you weren’t going to take it back.

“No, I’m sorry, I just, I’m really-”

“Annoying.” You glared at him, and then it was Jacks' turn to shrink, but he didn’t boil back, and you felt a twinge of guilt. “Look, just, just give me an hour.” You opened your laptop back up while Jack slumped over, flicking his pop tab in defeat. After a few minutes of the “tingggggg” noise echoing in the quiet room, you reached over, without looking up from your screen, and placed your hand on top of his fingers to stop the flicking. You kept it their longer then you meant to, and Jack rubbed your knuckles with his thumb, lightly squeezing your hand. You pulled it away abruptly, and wouldn’t let yourself look at the heartbroken look on his face.

Awhile later your phone buzzed for what felt like the thousandth time from your laptop bag and you couldn’t take it anymore. You ripped your bag across the table and dug around for it in the front pocket.

“Why the hell do you keep calling me?” You said sharply into your phone.

“I was calling to ask you why the hell Jack has been active on Instagram for the past three and a half hours?” Katherine matched your tone on the other end. You pulled your phone back from your ear to look at the time and cringed when you realized how much you’d gone over your hour. Jack had walked off into your bedroom what you thought was a few moments ago but was actually two hours ago. You were still annoyed though, and Katherine being so nosy didn’t help.

“I don’t know, he just is,” You said snarkily. “I’m studying,”

“Your parents are out of town and you SERIOUSLY, SERIOUSLY are studying on a Friday night instead of spending time with your boyfriend?” She sounded shocked, and you didn’t appreciate her judgment.

“Look, Kath, I-”

“Especially after he got fired yesterday.” Your heart dropped.

“Wait, what?” You prayed that you had misheard her.

“Yeah, I guess he forgot to call in yesterday, so when he didn’t show up his boss told him to, and I quote, ‘not bother showing up anytime after that either.’“ Katherine explained exasperatedly. You wanted to vomit. “Wait, how did you not know about this?”

“Um, ahhh, I gotta go,” You said, standing up quickly and hanging up as you walked towards your bedroom. You slid your phone into the pocket of your jeans and lightly tapped the closed door to open it a smidge. Jack was sitting on your bed, on the phone with someone, his back propped up against the wall, looking out the window with his forearms resting on his knees which were bent up so his feet were on top of your comforter. You pushed your door open a little more to see that he had taken his shoes off so he didn’t get dirt on your bed, which he knew you detested. A small smile pulled at the edges of your cheeks; even who he was upset with you, he went out of his way to please you. He was so selfless. Your smile fell. And because of that selflessness, he had ended up sacrificing his job to help you out. You looked back at your laptops glowing screen in the dark dining room, the blue light reflecting off the cover of your textbook. School stressed you out so much. So, so much. You had always been a very good student, but a slight dip in your performance the semester before had lead to a stern talking-to from your parents that made you absolutely terrified to get anything lower than a perfect 4.0.

You looked back at Jack, who was still on the phone, flicking paint out from under his nails, oblivious to you in the doorway. He gets that, you thought to yourself. Jack understood the pressure from your parents and the immense fearful stress school put you under. Jack was always willing to be a supportive boyfriend, no matter how hard you made it.

“Oh yeah, no (he’s/she’s/they’re) busy studying right now. (He’s/She’s/They’re) really stressed about school,” Jack said into the phone. “Hey, hey, (his/her/their) parents are really strict and put on a lot of pressure, it’s not (his/her/their) fault. Besides, I’ve never seen you turn in homework once so shut up.” Oh my god, You thought, feeling yourself tear up. He was literally standing up for you over something that you had just argued about, and on top of it, he didn’t know you were watching him, so he did this out of sheer integrity. You let your guard down for a second and let out a loud sniff, and immediately darted behind the door, hoping he didn’t see you. He continued talking to whoever it was he was on the phone with, causing you to let out a sigh of relief. Then you just stood there for a moment, unsure of what to do. You peaked around the door again, just as he started to laugh.

“Hahaha, yeah me too, I haven’t had dinner yet, I’m starved.” For a moment you felt even more guilty, knowing he was waiting for you to eat, but then you felt a light bulb click on over your head. You headed into the kitchen and began to quietly open and shut cabinets, gathering the ingredients you knew you would need to surprise Jack. Your boyfriend was often fairly mysterious, but one thing everyone could tell you about him was his obsessive and at times even frightening love of snickerdoodles. As you quietly dumped cups of flour into a bowl, you couldn’t control the small giggle that escaped your mouth as you remembered what an important role snickerdoodles had played in your relationship.

“You have some snickerdoodle crumbs on your lips,” Jack had said after diving into the cookies you had made for him on his birthday. But before you could reach for a napkin, he had stopped you. “Actually, let me take care of that.” And the next thing you knew you were having your first kiss with Jack Kelly.

You carefully pulled the pan of cookies out of the oven and slid them onto a plate. You clicked the oven off and picked up the plate, your hands protected by polka-dot oven mitts. You knew you should probably wait for them to cool, but you were too impatient. You walked over to your bedroom and bumped the door open with your hip. Jack’s phone call had ended awhile ago, and he was laying on his back on your bed, his knee propped to support the notebook he was drawing on with the stub of a pencil. He looked up when you walked in, and quickly set aside the drawing materials.

“Snickerdoodles?” He looked at the plate and then back up at you. “I always welcome humankind's best invention but what is the occasion?”

“A sincere apology,” You said, you had practiced what you were going to say while you were baking.

“Oh no, I’m sorry, you don’t have to-” Jack started, shaking his head.

“No, I do.” You said, setting the plate on your comforter and gesturing for him to take a cookie. “I was being a self-centered asshole, and for that, I am so deeply sorry.” Jack began to shake his head again as he slowly broke his snickerdoodle in half. “No, I was.” You said, sliding your hand under his chin and lifting it up so he was looking you in the eye. “I am so sorry about your job, Jack. That was completely my fault and I take full responsibility. I promise I will call your boss and try and talk him into taking you back, and if he won’t I will find you another job. A good one, that you like. I promise.” Jack set his cookie back on the plate and turned his head away and swallowed hard. You moved the plate to the floor and reached your arms around his shoulders to pull him closer to you.

“You are just so selfless. Truly, the sacrifices you make for everyone else, without a second thought amaze me. If you lost your job to help me with a science project, I cannot imagine the other things you have given up to make other people even the slightest bit happier.” You heard Jack choke into your shoulder, and you planted a soft kiss on his head. “You are the best person I know, Jack Kelly.” And with that, your boyfriend let out a broken sob and his shoulders began to shake as he cried. You slowly leaned back on your bed so that Jack’s head rested on your chest and his tears dripped onto your T-shirt. You rubbed his back and kissed his head, careful to be delicate. Eventually, his sobs stopped and the two of you sat in connected silence.

“Where are those snickerdoodles?” Jack sniffed. You laughed.

“They’re on the floor.” You lifted your arms so he could lean down and get them. He picked the plate up and set it up over your shoulder, grabbing the one he broken in half earlier. He kissed you sweetly before laying back down on your chest and nibbling on the cookie contentedly. You looked down at him with a warm smile on your face and in your heart.

“I love you, Jack.”

“I love you too, Y/N.”

#newsies #newsies fandom #newsies fanfiction #newsies fanfic #newsies imagine #broadway #jack kelly #broadway musicals #jack newsies #newsies jack #jack kelly x reader #jack kelly imagine #jack kelly fanfic #jack kelly fanfiction

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woulddieforperrytheplatypus · 4 years

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To distract myself from this awful political scene I'm forced to watch for history class: can you give us some obscure side characters (like, Dr. Diminutive, Newton the Gnu, type characters) you absolutely love for no reason? :) <3

Okay I am literally so late because I was doing my chem reading and my writing hw BUT I can’t refuse a chance to scream about my favorite characters (but y’all can refuse to listen to my scream about them so here’s a cut)

First of all, I want you to know that I haven’t even started listing characters yet and this ask has already lead me to spend almost $4 on Agent P’s Guide to Fighting Evil and that’s why I don’t look at the PnF wiki when I’m tired thank you for coming to my TED talk

I almost feel like I’m cheating by starting with Dr. Diminuitve but HOW CAN I NOT LIKE TELL ME THAT LIL MAN IS NOT THE BEST CHARACTER THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN OKAY FUCKIN DO IT JUST KIDDING YOU CAN’T I mean come on, one of his first lines was literally “I don’t have a Napoleon complex; Napoleon had a ME complex!” I had to check the wiki to see if that was his first line ever and I’m very disappointed that it wasn’t and then in OWCA’s Going Down when all the evil scientists were just vibin against the fence and they started doing that West Side Story snappy walk and Diminutive was so into the snaps that he just didn’t fucking move and then he opened his eyes and the rest of the gang was halfway off the screen fjdskhfkalsfhaskl I just really love him okay the more I think about it the more convinced I am that he’s actually my favorite character

Idk if this counts as an obscure side character but he is incredibly underrated so I gotta throw in: LAWRENCE FUCKING FLETCHER. He’s just such a pure and innocent lil dude. He sees the boys doing dangerous shit and he’s just like, “Well that’s happening,” or better yet, “Hey, that looks fun!” I mean, the airplace? The flying carpet? The monster trucks? He genuinely gives zero fucks and I love him for it. I wholeheartedly believe that Lawrence knows Perry is a secret agent -- or at least that he’s smarter than he acts -- but he’s literally so indifferent to everything going on around him that he never mentions it because life is full of fun and exciting things like that and he can’t talk about them all, you know? And he gets so excited about his antiques and he’s so passionate about history and ughhhh I love him

I was about to say I feel like I’m cheating by using a special but it just occurred to me that that’s lowkey how I’ve prefaced all of these so no, fuck that, I’m using a special and that’s just how it’s gonna be. CARL FROM THE LAND OF INTERNUS WOULD HAVE MADE A MUCH BETTER ENDING THAN THE ACTUAL BOOK HAD AND FUCK YOU MONOGRAM FOR CUTTING CARL OFF BEFORE HE COULD TELL IT HOW HE WANTED TO

These two kinda go hand-in-hand but Bunka Da Bunkaquan and Sweary the Swan are my favorite alternative Perrys. As far as the specials go, Steampunx isn’t one of my favorites, but Sweary the Swan is just... How do you even describe Sweary the Swan? He is life. He is the reason I wake up in the morning. He is the only thing worth living for. And then Bunka Da Bunkaquan is just so fuckin cute and anyone who disagrees needs their eyes checked. And tbh while we’re talking about Tri-Stone area, I gotta throw in a mention of Doofengung no of course I didn’t have to google what his name was what are you talking about because I love how he just stares at the water and every time it drips he just fuckin cackles lmaooo

Okay one more special (maybe) but Doofenshmirtz in The Temple of Juatchadoon brooo I just googled it to make sure I spelled that right and I did woah my power is unmatched is lowkey my favorite Doofenshmirtz. I don’t know if it’s because I actually like him more than every other Doof or if it’s just because his first scene was with Phineas Ohio Flynn and they knew each other and they had actual interactions throughout the episode and the Doof/Phineas relationship is my favorite underexplored relationship, but Juatchadoon Doof makes the list anyway

The “what did you think, _________ was just going to fall out of the sky?” couple — who 100% deserved that cameo in catu

I’m almost afraid to say this in public, but I actually really like Roger. I was mostly indifferent to him at first, but then Delivery for Destiny happened and I was like wait a minute, why am I sleeping on his man who literally orders boxes just to give to his cat? And once I realized that he was kinda cool, it started sinking in that he was never actually a bad guy. Heinz never even really claimed he was -- if anything, his problem is that Roger isn’t a bad guy, and everyone in Gimmelshtump and Danville knows it. And I gotta give Roger credit for not being too harsh on his brother, because yeah, he can be a little stuck up (I’m looking at you, stupid golf game), but you can’t really blame him for thinking he’s better than Heinz, you know? But at least he’s not a dick about it like their parents are. Also the entire latter half of this paragraph was me trying to find a way to work in the other part of that scene with the cat box and it didn’t work so I’m just gonna tack it on to the end because this isn’t an essay for English class and I can do that lmao. Paul mentions that he just delivered something to a Heinz Doofenshmirtz, and Roger is like 😬 because let’s be real, no one wants to be represented by the type of dude to try to juice City Hall, but he’s obviously not going to say that because he’s still a respectful dude, so he’s just like “Charming... man... isn’t he...” and he’s literally so uncomfortable and it cracks me up every time but also it’s lowkey kinda wholesome because Heinz may make it his life mission to embarrass his brother but Roger doesn’t reciprocate. but I accidentally discovered a few weeks ago that John O’Hurley is a raging Trump supporter so I gotta dock points for that one

In the same vein, Paul the delivery guy. What more do I have to say?

If my love of Roger didn’t turn the world against me, this one probably will, but I’m going to say it loud and proud anyway. I LOVE PETER THE PANDA. He’s just??? so??? cute??? Like when he was tearing apart Doof’s inator and he was just... actually no scratch that I need pictures for this because I can’t explain this in words

THIS IS NOT EITHER OF THE PICTURES I WAS LOOKING FOR BUT LOOK AT THIS LITTLE GUY OH MY GOD

Peter really said “this bitch empty, YEET!”

okay but the ones I was actually looking for are...

I mean, how can you not find him adorable? And don’t even get me started on his relationship with Perry because Meapless in Seattle was just... B R O Perry flew halfway across the country (probably I mean idk where exactly Danville is but they use EST so Seattle is probably halfway across the country?) just to go grab a coffee with him. They went on a lil date at a fancy restaurant I know Dan said it wasn’t a date but he's been wrong in the tiktok comments before which means none of his opinions are canon lmao. They’re just? So? Cute? I don’t even know what to make of their relationship but I live for it.

And I can’t mention Peter without bringing up his nemesis, who, to be entirely honest, I also don’t know what to make of and he’s mostly on this list because I like the line “How did you get chorus girls in here?” and when I downloaded and cut a bunch of songs that you can download from Google Drive here if you want, I specifically kept that part in because I love it lmao (I do gotta point out tho because it’s been bugging me since I last watched the episode: I don’t think we have any proof that Professor Mystery even exists in the PnF dimension. I had just assumed he did for the longest time, but that entire episode takes place in a dimension where Lawrence is a polar bear. Who knows what other differences there are?)

I love all the grandparents and I don’t even have an explanation they’re just all adorable

Okay I know I said no more specials but TECHNICALLY at2d isn’t a special; it’s a movie. I am physically incapable of not brining up the muffin time Normbot and the “I use aggression to mask my insecurites” Normbot.

While we’re talking about Norm, his old head would 100% swear all the fucking time if it wasn’t a kids’ show and i gotta respect it

Dan Povenmire does one line for a dude named Vinnie in Mission Marvel and off the top of my head I don’t remember who he is but it was the beginning of the episode and I think (?) it was during the New York scene and he does it in the Vinnie Dakota voice long before Dakota was even a concept (I’m assuming) so he gets a mention

Jerry the Platypus gives me Paper Jam Dipper vibes and they are both valid as fuck (the fucked up Doof copy is not valid as fuck tho we’re gonna pretend he didn’t exist)

Don is literally the best part of Where’s Pinky and I’m not just saying that because I’ve been watching Whose Line for years and I was super excited to see Wayne Brady in the credits (and the fact that he was also in both the quarantine rap and catu makes me incredibly happy)

Ooh I almost forgot OWCA Files existed but Harry the Hyena playing the trumpet and the subsequent “you’re gonna be wearing that in a minute” is the best part of OWCA Files and tbh just Doof, Perry, and Harry could have carried an entire series by themselves (though I do also love Karen and Maggie)

WAIT A SECOND THE BUG TRIO FJDSAHFLKSAJD I was trying to pick a favorite last time I watched OWCA Files and every time one of them spoke they were my new favorite like I lowkey thought their plotline was boring but the characters themselves were hilarious

WAIT ANOTHER SECOND HOW DID I GET THIS FAR INTO THE LIST WITHOUT MENTIONING MONTY HOLY SHIT I’M SUCH A FAKE FAN BUT I LOVE MONTY OKAY HE IS LITERALLY JUST OZ FROM BTVS EXCEPT MONTY AND VANESSA HAVE BETTER CHEMISTRY THAN OZ AND WILLOW AND NO I WILL NOT BE ACCEPTING CRITICISM

Wait I forgot Vlorkel too omfg these two belong way higher on the list but Vlorkel is the love of my life (and I lowkey wish she had met Steve the giant chameleon because they would have become best friends)

I wanna keep going but it’s currently 1:45 in the morning (this is why I’ve been avoiding asks during the day: I get way too into them and spend a solid hour and a half on them and I’d never get any schoolwork done lmao) and it’s far from the first time I’ve stayed up this late but I figured it was fine because I have no classes tomorrow but it occurred to me like four seconds ago that I DO HAVE A CLASS TOMORROW SHIIIIT I had an anatomy exam on Tuesday during my usual class time (which if you read my tags you might have known about because I was having an existential crisis over it) so he moved our class tomorrow excePT IT’S NOT TOMORROW IT’S TODAY IT’S LITERALLY IN LESS THAN SEVEN HOURS FUCKING HELL I GOTTA GO TO BED ASAP

#shoutout to Sam for sending me this ask so i stayed up this long raving about my babies #because i would 100% have gone to bed without setting an alarm if i wasn't still awake #why did i buy a calendar if i dont use it lmao rip #pnf #look i have an ask

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unproduciblesmackdown · 3 years

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even more prompts catchup

April 5th: What was school like for you, or what is it currently like for you if you are still in school? Elementary, high school, post-secondary?

i Hate/d school lmfao......like i do Like To Learn and Know Shit, and of course Sometimes / on some occasions it was like, hey i'm having a good to pretty great time at school, but those were usually Special occasions or teachers going out of their way to give us you know, fun projects / go beyond the Standardized Testing curriculum, which natch they couldn't always do / did require sort of going Above & Beyond, rather than being the constant, guaranteed experience of like hooray for school......it's like, oh hooray re: the Play Scenes my fourth grade english class did that was like, an Extra thing, where we got to audition and i just had a great time like oh right, clearly Theatre in retrospect, or hooray re: the field trips, or projects we did In Class, since i hated homework.......i was always that accursed (i mean, not accursed for Me, but) combination of "really a terrible student but also gets great grades" lmao i forever do things Last Minute but like, when i was At school, in class, i'd just power through whatever work there was then & there usually, and in middle school would sometimes do hw on the bus, as i was the last on the bus route to be picked up in the morning or dropped off in the afternoon, but as soon as i got home i was in Home Mode and yknow. didn't just sit down and continue School Stuff asap. also hardly ever Studying unless it's the night / morning before a test lmfao but i had a great memory for that stuff, so studying that last minute was like "yep, i Do remember this from going over it 2 seconds ago" so yknow, despite hating school / no good Study Habits(tm) or anything, i did fine. i also read a ton, at home or at school and at any other point. so i was also like, quiet and generally ~well behaved~ or whatever lol (the like "how are kids (or anyone) supposed to stay focused and on task for 7+ hours a day..." thing), segue into next paragraph

i also remember like, 3 day a week preschool being the first time i was, you know, in some sort of School and also around other kids that much, i did have this sense that like, somehow there were Rules that i wasn't following, not re: Classroom Rules or something, but wrt socializing with peers, like that everyone else had something going on in how they interacted which i wasn't gonna get right, & i had this sense of like, not really being Allowed to interact lmao, even being 4 years old i have a few distinct memories re: this of like, a) choosing to play by myself in the classroom or when outside, and b) my "best friend" being the one person who just like, chose to hang out with me lmfao, but i was like oh cool Having A Friend lmao, like i didn't Not want to have friends, i was just already aware of like, i don't feel like i can just up and interact w/these people and i don't feel like they want me to, and c) re: that being aware of whatever Rules Of Interaction existing and that i wouldn't meet them / abide by them and thus there'd be some kind of repercussion for not meeting those rules, and not being allowed, i remember that like. there was this other indoor playspace in the lower level and there were toys i wanted to play with but Refrained from, and it was like, why did 4 yr old me get the idea i Wasn't Really Allowed, and most of what i can theorize is that it was like, well other kids might want to play with that, and the Normal / Better kids should get priority lmao, and/or being nervous that it just might otherwise lead to some sort of Interaction i wouldn't feel ready for.....and d) sitting at a table with like whatever 4 or 5 other kids or something and amongst ourselves someone was like "oh put your foot in the middle if you're [x]" and i tried to join in on a technicality lmfao and also just in, you know, active efforts to be Participating with these other kids on their terms, and it did not pay off, something that repeated uhhhhh, forever i guess lol. insert that post like can allistic people be normal for 5 seconds.....

like in elementary school i wasn't really making friends either, incredibly, i was Amicably Tolerated by many people then & like, again also at any point after at least lmao (and it helps that i was generally in teachers' good graces, not that i narced on anyone ever, but i had like, my Niche as the Academically Successful One, and also i was the kid who draws, another shoutout to some post and tweet about how being The Drawing Kid was like, some measure of respect but also disdain lmfao...) and sometimes people would again like. choose to interact with me repeatedly, and i'd sort of be nonplussed at best b/c it's like, okay thanks but in this situation i didn't Choose this any more than i choose [Trying to be in the group but being rejected/excluded], so it's kinda weird, i was friends with someone for a few years in elementary school but we just were Coincidentally in the same class for those years, when we were in different classes in 3rd or 4th grade and just weren't seeing each other it fizzled out, in middle school i made another couple friends where we were all being Funny lmao, but i didn't go to high school, so once again we weren't seeing each other, and [At School] was where i always had most Interactions with people, didn't see people much outside of school even if we were hanging out / being friends During school, for [a whole tangent] reasons, so. guess the good news is i'm still in touch / friendly acquaintances with some people from school from college, but even then, there was Some more social success or whatever, but not all That much, and i was still unhappy like, not having many friends, often being like "i'm going to the cafe a block away b/c i have no social occasions here and i want to get out of the dorm / be around people," that if i was with more than one other person i could end up the third wheel friend lmao or nobody is paying attention when you talk or oh no i put myself out there hanging with a friend group but maybe people thought you were a joke or something, thanks. smh

and that like, speaking of college, i went early but this was, for my part, truly primarily driven like "well i hate school so if i can Not go to high school, okay" and like, while i got in and everything it was still like "tf is college, i've never known what i Want To Do so i wonder if i'll figure this out, but i'm not expecting to last past the first semester / year b/c this is college and i'm a terrible student actually lol" but then turns out i kept doing well enough like A's & B's like oh woops i guess i'm still here, then, hope i can figure out what tf "credit hours" means (finally did lol).....then sophomore year was a bunch of just Agonizing over "what tf do i major in," something i never figured out, wherein i might bring something up & it got parentally shot down like "never heard you talk about that" like what tf Did you hear me talk about? are you thinking i had my life figured out by age 9, b/c i didn't think that, i'm only 15/16 even Now, even being the Regular college age it's like, nobody's figuring their life out then. also i didn't tell my parents things, so. and then i settle on something that sure, Might've been of interest, but also it was like, a) a program that barely existed and req'd taking classes at a like 30 min away campus and also the head of department had Just retired and the most heinous teacher in the related fields was now in charge, brilliant and b) the sort of thing you'd just wanna start taking prerequisites for like as soon as you set foot on campus, like, great. and c) i was like, hardly feeling all the Academic Ambition anyway b/c i never had, b/c i hate/d school, and b/c i still didn't Know what i wanted to major in, and i was stressed n depressed and also realizing oh right, i'm not cishet, and oh right, i'm never going to get along with my family b/c [long tangent] reasons and that's kind of concerning, here i am impending Being 18 and like, how do i get out of this b/c it's becoming clearer that i'm not just gonna start getting along with the 'rents now that i'm not an elementary schooler and also now that i'm realizing the Reasons being at home sucks. guess i learned stuff in college lol but also it was like, the experience of getting to be Away From Home and existing every day without parents literally / figuratively over my shoulder at some point every day, and getting to do shit on my own and figure things out while Not At Home.....i also had a lot of fun taking a couple classes from this one music prof lol. he was this weird really enthusiastic and really knowledgeable guy lmao like great, these evening classes where we go over to the arts building and he plays things on the piano off the cuff and tells a lot of tangential stories while we're learning about like, beethoven technically, or folk music. didn't need those classes but they were great, i've had these teachers who were totally into whatever they were teaching and had a great time with that

also acknowledgment to the fact i was a No Extracurriculars person all through school, k thru 6 and college alike really, although i took dance class for that k thru 6 period, just that was separate from school actually (and another fun "being away from home" thing and Theatresque performance thing i enjoyed) but besides that it was like, how do i figure out what i want to do without committing to joining this whole thing, i don't know How to sign up for stuff really either, and it'd probably entail "asking for stuff" and needing to coordinate more rides and etc and that's just a hassle, and i wanna go home from school asap anyways, and then like, when it came to college, i was again at first thinking like "well idk what i'm doing and i hate homework so i'll probably mess it up in this first year anyways" and figured that doing anything Extra outside classes was just gonna be too much, and also, it's like, i've never been in these kinds of groups before and why am i gonna start in college, where there'll probably be all these people who Have done this stuff before, and are also 18? e.g. even though it was like "hey you're away from home and don't have to ask/tell anyone else anything to do this club stuff or whatever!" supposed ideal environment for trying stuff out, it was like, maybe i'm theoretically interested in auditioning for the fall theatre production, but the last acting experience i had was like, "2 month drama class in middle school" or "that 4th grade [section of a] play" so like, not really Any education or experience or Training re: any of that stuff, and a bunch of 18 yr olds who might've, or [age peers] who were theatre people who had already done stuff so they weren't getting Lead Roles or anything but they were getting cast / taking classes / joining an a capella group while i'm like right on, i'm over here with some sort of Grade Honor Society (??) saying my gpa qualifies me to join and be able to experience some further academic rigor/requirements lmfao and i'm like absolutely not. get away lol. anyways so bit of a chaotique Post K12 Zone Education Experience there lmfao, all kinds of things i'd Like to Learn and even take classes on, but didn't like, right i love learning languages but never took classes, love math and shit but only got to a certain level of calc and even then seemed to miss some Lore, never did anything re: theatre, etc and so on. so you wonder if some advantages re: high school would be like, more chances for those extracurriculars (or regular curriculars) but, as though i wouldn't have the same qualms about getting in on any of it, and as if i wouldn't've still hated school but also still been at home, F. and i think people can be a lot more normal to each other when it's college and you're Not stuck in one building together 8 hours a day lmao, got some gentle "occasional Bullying style attention" in middle school, but had juuust enough like, [that Niche of good grades / kid who draws] and people who Were friendlier to me that it was you know, unpleasant, but didn't have to be that huge a deal, and then i was outta there soon enough. also, in college many people are 18 or older, as opposed to 11 to 13. anyways the rest of my school story was that in the end the problems were "i don't know what i want to major in and also now's a worse time than ever b/c i've realized my existence At Home is untenable, and naturally i am quite depressed & stressed about things, and i gotta say absolutely virtually every adult presence was either totally unhelpful to Counterproductive here lmao, like, not much anyone could do really but it's helpful when someone is like, i'll treat you like a person vs simply just going 'uh why are you not doing the academic stuff good enough'" lmfao like. the whole time Not having friends i'd wanna talk to through class and happening to get good grades in part b/c i somehow Could as easily as i did and also i was afraid of getting C's or worse b/c "tfw i wasn't even yet in a grade that gave you A thru F grades yet but my older sister caught shit for getting a C

like :/" and etc means adults are like My Student Is Fine, and also, what are you gonna do even if they aren't, i guess. i just had to figure out completely for myself Why and How i really wasn't Fine and that was quite difficult and also took a long time. then there was a mutual prank of "i drop out of college at the tail end of things" and "now i have to be at home with parent/s more resentful of your obvious Waywardness (insert: not being cishet, and the fact it occurs to me that my being autistic was always causing 'problem' behavior i was getting shit for like, the whole time lmfao, even if nobody knew / labeled it like oh this is for ND reasons, or if it was both true i tried to come out (smh, thought i Had to b/c that was part of Not Being Cishet) and it was simply ignored / unaddressed and yet it sure fueled further specific resentment of my not Performing Gender properly, or "worse," so that went well, in that i eventually abruptly left and did not maintain contact, in the interest of "the levels to which i was thriving was like, that if i bailed and like died 50 hrs later it'd still be what i want to do," true to that i did not / don't regret it. and what do you know, i was first able to bail to a relatively nearby friend from college's home, whose family also liked me lmao. shoutout to school still being where i made Any friends, except a friend i made who was a coworker of several years. and Online Friends, which, another school connection, that like, i can more readily Connect w/people via talking about interests, something that happened Sometimes at school in person lmao but not much, but also that i Talk About Interests in a way through Drawing, which, well shoutout to doodling in the margins of papers throughout school lmfao, it didn't hurt! that's my saga.

oh and that footnote, i also really enjoyed the "in middle school you either take language classes or 4 Electives you rotate through each year" and those electives sure featured some more varied and hands on activities i had a great time with. shoutout to like, cooking, and to shop class, my Car Designs were great apparently, idk how. shoutout to my Intuition re: engineering or something lmaoo.....very fun to just end the schoolday in that big garage space where you could actually open that garage door right to where all the buses were, beautiful. Oh, and that's another footnote, when my last class of the day in 8th grade was english, i'd sometimes finish work early and my teacher would let me go to our spacious library, with the v nice librarian who'd recommend books to me she thought should be checked out more often b/c she knew i liked to read that much, and also just generally had teachers / other adult staff kinda wandering in at the end of the day, talk about "i don't really relate to other ppl my age" where i did generally prefer to be around adults, so that was fun. oh and also shoutout to hating school lmao wherein during like, middle school when the schoolday started at like 7:30am or smthing disgusting and i just learned to like, view whatever time it was in a "at least it's almost [x]" like well okay, first period is math and that kinda sucks but at least once it's over this hardest part of the day will be over, then next class is kinda more chill at least, and then it'll be the last period before lunch, etc etc etc where i could sort of keep up that stamina like telling myself at any point it was Almost [a more encouraging time of day] lmao like. kinda fucked up to have to be dragging yourself through the weekdays like that, but

Oh! goddamn and i didn't even get into that if i ever got in ~trouble~ in elementary school it was stuff like Not Paying Attention, but where half the time that might be some other kid beside me messing around lmfao and i'm not gonna be like "uhhh follow the rules!!!" (and that even when i was In Trouble like go sit in the chair where you have to be quiet there for like 10 min i might say something to some other kid in that zone and they'd be like "um it's the quiet chair you have to be quiet!!" or "uh we're getting into the next lesson and you have to put that book back asap" like wow these other kids are dweebs about Rules lmfao) and there'd just be times like, it's 1st grade and i know how to read pretty well already but we're going over the alphabet like stoppp i know the Phonics already........or the ways ND people can kind of Intuit some stuff more successfully, like in third grade learning multiplication i neverrrrr studied but just broke it down like, okay i remember the Fives b/c of telling time, i know the 2x table and stuff, i know the commutative property, if we're all the way at the 8x and i haven't Memorized stuff, i can still like, break it down to say, [5 x 8] + [8 x 2] or something when i see 8 x 7, even if it takes a second lmfao.......and stuff like the tragedy of when i Did make a friend in like, 2nd grade, who i think we didn't even talk to each other ever?? i was playing legos or smthing by myself once during Indoor Recess and she just started playing agreeably along with me, aka someone socializing on My Terms apparently as our Introduction, and we just were friends past that but one time, not even during a Lesson Session, we were messing around quietly making each other laugh as the incredibly important process of "put papers in your folders" was going on, and since we were Not Paying Attention for some reason the teacher made a whole example of it where i had to carry my desk across the classroom for the Shaming Element of it and also so that i had to permanently sit way further from that friend, so that was kind of discouragement re: interacting at all. thank you to that teacher, who'd later once Gesticulate to me from across the gym that i should put my arms down at my sides rather than being crossed (we were rehearsing some class performance) & i had no idea what she was trying to convey, so afterwards she told me i had to have Reduced Recess Time or some shit because of Ignoring her instead of putting my arms down lmfao. and i was irritated at having been misinterpreted / my Intentions dictated to me and punished like that, but i was also used to it from adults lmfao and did not bother explaining myself lol like yeah god forbid i left my arms crossed on purpose and now i have to read some more during recess. tl;dr school has so much nonsense & i def had some Times re: being autistic & also just being someone who hated school forever lmao, think it was Also 2nd grade where one arbitrary sunday night i just cried out of frustration at having to go back for another normal school week. classic. oh and that also, while i wasn't like "oooo booksmart people who hate not having a Definitive Correct Answer to things &/or ohhh autistic ppl So Good at math, in a way everyone hates and disrespects, but they suck at Literature/Arts which requires you to reflect on humanity and shit," like, not only was i the drawing kid but i was also apparently ahead of the curve as it were at like, Literary Analysis lmfao where there was a few times in elementary school i'd be the kid providing the Interpretation like "what's this poem about / what's the theme or Symbolism in this story," but from elementary school to college it's like, for god's sake don't ask me to come up with a story / work with some really open ended prompt, i don't Invent in that way, and when i try to draw on Inspiration i'll get stuck on some specific source and be unable to do anything but just rip it off really lmao. but then again i was prolific in "it's 1st grade and you write and illustrate a little short story or smthing in these booklets

that we then have a simple little binding process for" like ohhh fancy, i got a tootsie roll lollipop at Awards Time for writing a shit ton of those lol. but that's like, when you're too young to have that much of a Creative Process anyways lmao. but then, my older sister, whose Thing was writing, has an incredible 2 Volume like, noir mystery saga from those elementary school times, it's a classic lmao. anyways once again so much to say about School lol closing the door after meandering on that one for this long lol

April 6th: Are you able to drive? If so, was it difficult to learn? What was difficult about it? If not, do you use any alternatives?

i did learn to drive, tbh just universally it's like, at any point you're driving there's A Lot to pay attention to at once, even if you think you're Good At That or whatever, which i sure don't think i always am lol, and it's pretty wild we just, you know, let everyone go around as fast as they want in machines that can kill you or someone else, and this is also Unnecessary b/c like, let's have accessible & reliable public transit so that everyone can travel without Needing to have a car / someone else who will drive them. i didn't think i had too much trouble learning to drive, but it had to help that i just took it very seriously from the start lmao like, well, i'm quite aware i could kill someone with this. the driving classes i took were alright, i remember the instructor being pretty chill and friendly lol. rip to the fact i could be tense when driving with parent/s, when driving a manual i'd always like screech the tires when accelerating out of a Stop, until all at once it was like "and i'm driving that manual car alone on a road trip & wouldn't you know it, only literally once did i have that issue of not getting out of a stop smoothly enough" lmao like the Anxiety......really like yeah i had an alright time learning and think i'm solid enough at driving / like doing it, theoretically, but Driving Is Wild just in general and let's have that public transit

April 7th: How are you with sarcasm and/or metaphors/figures of speech? Do you interpret things very literally?

i think i Usually get what people mean with these Devices but i can't really say lol, but anytime you know, someone is being more Implicit in what they say, plenty of times i can infer one implication and only later realize they probably meant a different one, or yknow, i make whatever initial inference i make and can be stuck like "???" and have to like, mentally run diagrams about the interaction lol......meanwhile i'm not always remembering that like, if i'm shifting context mentally that's necessarily able to be inferred by whoever i'm talking to lol, whether it's about getting into some adjacent topic or like, i don't think it tends to be very clear even in person when i've started being sarcastic lmao, like i know that can be true for anyone but it's like well, guess i gotta make it clearer i'm doing a bit......flipside of that or something lmao that people are more Obvious than they think they are sometimes about like, idk, when someone is sort of making some sarcastic remark to you but the sarcasm is also sort of only to themself, aka just like okay i know you mean this more dismissively / disparagingly than re: what you're saying just at face value lol like. just always fun >:/

#30daysofautismacceptance #2021 #you know that Read More means especially a saga even by my standards lmfao

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faelune-home · 4 years

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FFXIV Write 2020 #9: Lush

(A/N: No WoL featured this time, instead I did an NPC focused piece. Then again, as a post-Stormblood piece, miqo!Fufu would probably be the most likely one in this timeline, but the WoL doesn’t even come up so it doesn’t matter.

So here’s another mourning piece, in similar vein to my piece for Minfilia posted pre-ffxivwrite. With Lyse in the Shroud. :’’) I had this idea a while ago actually, but this got me the spark to actually write it.

Given how open the prompts are, part of me wonders if I’m still on prompt here when I don’t use the specific word and I don’t draw a lot of attention to the word meanings a lot. :’D I tried to allude to the word here by focusing on the life in the forests of the Shroud, but idk if I still miss the mark there. But it’s good to get me writing anyway, which is the point.

Spoilers for end of HW patches at least for a character death

Word count: 1395

@ffxiv-writers)

The East Shroud had ever been so full of life. In the treetops, in the ferns, in the tangled bramble patch, even deep in the twisted forest of the sylphlands, the creatures ever stirred. It was almost hard to imagine that only a scant few weeks before, a vicious primal that could’ve ended it all had hung over the imperial castrum at the forest’s edge.

That end never came, if only due to the acts of one man.

Near Amarissaix’s Spire, Lyse stood silent, staring at the metal walls of the castrum, so alien compared to the greenery surrounding it. So alien, yet so familiar to herself, with all the time she’d spent as part of the Scions fighting the Empire. Under another’s name…

She shook her head of the thought; she missed her sister greatly, of course she did. But then maybe the way she’d handled it hadn’t been the healthiest. Even so, Papalymo and the other Scions had indulged her odd grieving method. In a way, as much as she maybe could’ve been set straight long before now, she’d still come out okay. Maybe?

“Oh Papalymo,” she sighed, “sometimes I wish you were still here. Even if it wasn’t to have you help me - even if I still feel like I need the extra hands, especially running a whole resistance - at the very least...I want you to see how much I’ve changed.”

She smiled ruefully. “Of course, sometimes it feels like I haven’t at all. But I know I can’t just go crumbling when people need me. And at least I have Naago to keep me right...but it’d be nice if you could do it too.”

But there was no-one to respond to her. The only sound in the forest was the buzzing of insects and the rustling of the leaves. She sighed again.

“H-hey, excuse me miss!” she jumped as a voice called to her; a hyuran man in a Twin Adder Private’s coat ran up to her, “I’m sorry miss, I-I’m gonna have to ask you why you’re here. Idle loitering an’ all.”

Lyse flinched. Had she really been standing there long enough to look suspicious?

“I am so sorry, I didn’t mean to be here this long or I would’ve told an officer or someone at the Hut. I’ll be on my way soon, if someone from the Reach doesn’t come shortly after me,” she told him, shuffling on the spot. His eyes widened.

“Hold on, you’re- I’m so sorry, Commander Hext, I didn’t realise it was you!” He bowed, embarrassment clear on his face.

“Oh, no no, it’s fine, like I said, I shouldn’t have been standing here without telling someone,” she spluttered, surprised that he recognised her.

“I-it should be alright for you to stay, I can tell my commanding officer you came ‘round. But uh- why are you here, if you don’t mind me asking? I figured if it was official business like, you’d have an entourage or you’d be in the city.”

“I...Well it’s nothing official,” she shrugged, then looked back at the wall, adding, “I was just here to pay some respects. I was almost done.”

“Your old partner?”

She started, eyes wide at the young man, to which he flinched again and said, “Sorry! I didn’t-”

“No, I don’t mind,” she said quickly, trying to calm the jittery soldier. Gods they were both so flustered at that point, somebody could jump and reach the trees quicker than any Ishgardian dragoon. She looked over his uniform again, spying the Third Class emblem on the arm. He was still only a new recruit. “I just didn’t expect you to know him, that’s all. How long have you been an Adder then?”

“Not that long, ‘fraid to say. I remember seeing you and the lalafellin man around the city as part of the Scions before I signed up. Heard he passed at some point during the raid on the castrum.” Lyse frowned, looking to the structure with a hard look in her eye.

“B-but I helped with taking back Ala Mhigo,” he said, a proud smile spreading across his face. “Hells, I was with one of the groups storming the city as well.” The woman gawped. He looked the same age as her, and barely a new recruit at that.

“Well, I’m surprised. Grateful but surprised,” she said. He gave his chest a beat with his fist, and said, “Was only happy to help, Commander.”

“Lyse,” she smiled, “Just Lyse is fine. I just didn’t think Gridania would want to send such a new recruit all the way into the worst of the fighting and risk losing a fresh soldier. Not that you probably aren’t capable but-” She stumbled, worried it would sound like she was dismissing him, but she stopped when he shook his head.

“Nah, you’re right. I’m as green as any leaf in this wood here, But I asked to go in. Me and the rest of my unit, sprouts the lot of us.”

“...why?”

He shrugged. “Ours isn’t a common opinion in Gridania, I’ll say that first. ‘Cos most folk are still bitter about the Autumn War, even if it were years ago now and barely anyone that took part back then is still around. Some few are, aye, but not a lot. But my comrades and I thought, ‘If the alliance can forgive Ishgard for not doing their part for so many years while focusing on their war with the dragons and still take them back, then we could do the same for Ala Mhigo. Let bygones be bygones and help them out now they need it most.’ And if we were needed most in the thick of it, then we were gonna be in the thick of it.”

“That’s a good sentiment,” Lyse smiled, “I’d say Gridania should be proud to have a soldier like you in their ranks. It’d be nice to have more good thinkers like you and yours.” She sighed.

“Gridania’s always had some problems, and it’ll take time to sort it out. But one step at a time, right? But then I could say the same about Ala Mhigo.” She looked to the sky, her mind flashing back to that night as the mimic of Dalamud hung in the clouds, holding fast to its draconic prisoner.

“That’s why I wish he could be here to see it all now,” she mumbled, almost forgetting her company.

“What was he like?” the soldier asked.

A smirk crossed her lips. “He was stubborn as anything, and feisty. His tongue was sharper than any whip if he caught you saying or doing something ridiculous. I can attest to that right now.” She laughed, ignoring the prickling feeling at the corners of her eyes.

“But for all he said he was the no nonsense type, he could be lenient. Oh, he was lenient for a lot of things that he probably would’ve been snippy over otherwise. For every 10 silly questions I asked or stupid statements I said that he gave me grief over, there’d be another 5 things that he’d just let me have even if it was wrong or foolish or I should’ve known better.” Her words trailed off into a sob as tears flowed freely. In her mind she could almost hear a familiar voice chastising her for breaking down so easily in front of a stranger, especially with her new position.

To his credit, the soldier held out a handkerchief to her and said solemnly, “He sounded like a good man, Lyse.”

She nodded, taking the cloth and dabbing her eyes. “Yeah. He was a brilliant man. Brilliant and smart and ridiculously patient for someone that could blow up so quickly. He put up with me for so long.”

She sniffed, “Imagine, some brilliant scholar like him having a silly girl like me trailing around after him for years. Gods above, it’s a wonder anyone took us seriously.” Eyes dried, yet still watery, she handed back the handkerchief.

“Like I said before, I didn’t know him,” the man said, taking it back and pocketing it, “But from what you’ve said here, he would’ve been proud of the woman you are now. I feel pretty certain saying that.”

Lyse smiled again. “You know what? I feel certain enough to say you’d be right. He would be.”

#ffxivwrite2020 #ffxivwrite #lyse hext #ffxiv writing #ffxiv fanfic #ffxiv #final fantasy xiv #do no wol pieces count? are these okay?#also credit to the sb bard quests for bringing up the autumn war #my writing

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tangerinegod · 4 years

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Hello! I am sorry to bother you but I am a senior getting ready for college this year. I am in the US and I wanted to major in the same thing you did, do you have any possible tips for me? I still haven't even looked for colleges that would be best for animation majors so I figured if you were up to giving out any tips/saying any basic ideas if you wanted to/if you had the time to then maybe I'll have a better idea! I apologise for if I sound weird! I'm tried to word it correctly but I can't 😿

hi!! i’m totally down to share my experiences! someone else also had some questions so i’m going to put them all together in this post haha, hopefully this helps! it’ll get pretty long so apologies ahead of time but art school is a lot to think about so i wanna be as helpful as i can around it, its a lot of time and money. I’m gonna put it all under a read more cus it is really really long!

i wanna start off with the fact that I had the privilege of attending school in a financially stable environment, my parents were/are really supportive so w merit scholarship i only came out with around 20-30k in debt and i also had housing support my entire time in school. they were ok with me focusing on academics so i didn’t hold a retail job unless i was out of school like summer/winter break. Ofc though i regularly take commissions/do merch/cons to try and pay for all bills that arent rent cus i did want to be financially independent where it was possible. I also did try and work during the semester but everytime i did my body would deff start to breakdown from the fact that i didnt wanna compromise schoolwork with jobs.. so just read ahead know this experience is from a student who was able to attend focusing only on school work for most of the time!

the biggest thing is knowing art school is not required to become a professional in either freelancing or industry! there are a huuuge amount of online tools and classes these days that provide the exact same education and for cheaper too. i think it depends on what experience you prefer/can handle/want but it’s definitely possible to make art/animation art your living without higher education. the thing that college will for sure give you though is the ability to meet deadlines, work even when you dont want to, and connections with peers+teachers. i think the connections part is invaluable because you’re basically coming out with a network of people you already know and who know you!

also its good to know if you want to attend/can handle art school! it’s a lot of time and energy and students get burned out really fast. the best piece of advice i got before going was ‘if you draw every single day, even if its for only like 5-10 minutes or a doodle for a whole year you should be fine’ consistency is super key because you’re attending school to draw, and you’ll have to create work for stuff you aren’t excited for at some point or another. burnout is extremely real and the only reason i didn’t experience it was probably because i got super into drawing naruto fanart again inbetween sophomore and junior year! it helped give me something to draw seperated from school which is the only thing i was drawing for since i had entered rip. a heads up id also consider myself a workaholic so i fit in ok with the ‘art school’ environment but it is suuper unhealthy. if you are fantastic at managing your schedule then it’s definitely possible to take care of yourself! freshman year i got 8 hours a sleep a night and only pulled all nighters for some second semester finals at the end. sophomore year + up though i ended up prioritizing hw over sleep and like for sure, definitely shortened my life span. there’s another q down below where i’ll go more into detail but ya, be careful w ur work balance!

another tip especially for animation is knowing for a fact what type of animation you’re looking to go into, and what the school is offering. I didn’t think i’d get into art school at the time so i only applied to two places + decided if i didnt get into either id attend community to get credits out of the way while building portfolio. honestly? i did not do a lot of research LOL but like i did end up having the chance to tour and stuff! just know that each school will have a very different curriculum. The main differences are schools that prioritize 3D (cg animation, cg modeling, ect) and 2D/traditional (hand drawn, ‘oldschool’, digital or traditional based) this is a huge difference so make sure you do research for it! in most cases a 2D/traditional program will also offer 3D since it’s at the forefront of the industry animation wise rn. My school taught 2D but like hand drawn on physical paper 2D, frame by frame. while it was a good experience it’s super outdated because digital tools make it way faster + easier! i’d recommend looking for a program that is digital 2D over traditional 2D.

if after your senior year covid is still affecting campuses in the US to keep them shut down i’d recommend attending a community college to get credits and then transferring into school. one of the negatives is paying money for gened classes when ur not there for them; if you can get them out of the way sooner and cheaper there is absolutely no negative + you could graduate earlier or use the extra time for better work or to work a job!

these are all the general tips i think i’d give on like a broad basis of attending or not to think about? let me know if u have more q’s! someone asked q’s im answering below that go more into personal experiences + work culture so heres those:

- how many hours a week do u spend studying, in class, otherwise making art? like how much of ur life does it consume?

I was basically working on art.... 24/7! since i wasnt working a job at the same time i crammed as many credits as possible into my schedule so on avg i did 18 credit semesters (around 6 classes) art classes go for 6 hours and non art go for 3, so i’d spent around 30-35 hours in class a week! hw wise it varied on the class but combined it would be around 35-50 hours a week... im guessing? on average studio classes would have 8-10 hours of hw, maybe 5 for a light week, and gened classes 5 hours w them all combined. or this was probably how things were before junior year? junior+senior year i had thesis + everything else ontop.. i’d spend around 30-40 hours on thesis a week with other classes ontop of that bc my film was super long cus im a dummy!

- is it hard going to art school n realising that altho u were probably quite talented… so is everyone else? Like. all of a sudden. ur not special and everyone seems as good as u, you know? More generally, how do u deal with comparison?

kinda?? i think instead of the idea of like you vs others it feels more of like a competition at first to be the best. this varies hugely on school culture though; my animation year was really friendly with each other and get along extremely well, so my answer to this is v different than some others who attended different schools. i think that the idea of ‘comparison’ only lasts a portion of the first year because at some point you realize that it’s not a who’s better as much as its a ‘these are my coworkers’ type thing? like healthy competition 100% because we’re all working to improve but i think most of us learned pretty early on that viewing each other as peers going into the same workforce helped a lot. also at some point everyone develops their own style/starts to develop their artistic preferences so there isn’t a way to compare whos 'better’ anymore? i dont think there ever is tbh because style is appealing based off of an individuals preferences. If anything realizing everyone else is also amazing makes you wanna work harder ig? or thats how i felt! it’s inspiring to be surrounded by so many people who create such amazing work.

- is there a lot of workaholic culture? all nighter culture?

100000% there can be a workaholic and all nighter culture. i know people who avoided it and thats honestly fantastic because i fall super easily into that pit. sometimes i’ll pull all nighters on a personal project just because i really want to finish it... i am definitely considered a workaholic all the way through and its not healthy rip... i’d estimate at the worst i was pulling 2-3 all nighters a week and only 4-5 hours of sleep on the nights i didn’t? that was only for one year tho, after that i was like yeah ok this is really bad for my health in the long run LOL so i tried to cut it down to one all nighter a week and around 5-6 hours of sleep the rest of the week! by senior year my decision to cram in full semesters paid off and i was able to consistently get around 7 hours of sleep a night + no all nighters minus finals since my schedule was lighter despite thesis 😭 while there is that culture i don’t think people view it as like a badge of honor or something to be proud of anymore which is good, we mostly view it as a flaw of the art school system and something that needs to be fixed!!

- are you glad u did it? how did u know it was what u wanted?

i am glad i did it! i’m definitely in a limbo right now of if it was worth both my time, money, and my parents money rip but i think with what i got out of it i definitely wouldn’t be as far skill wise or knowledge wise when it comes to the art industry. i would say it was only worth it for be because i had so much support going in though so i was able to focus so much on improving. if i had only been able to put in part of the effort and not make full use of the resources provided i would honestly have a different answer..

i knew it was what i wanted when i realized i really couldn’t see myself pursuing a different profession happily! despite all the bumps and stuff im fully in love with drawing still and feel honored that it’s a field that can provide a living. my second profession choice was to go into culinary school? and third option i think going was into music cus i was also a band kid hehe.

- how do u cope with ur hobby becoming ur job? how do u deal with art going from something u do for fun to something u do on command constantly?

i think seperating work art from personal art is important! in my case im doubling naruto into being personal work so i have something to fall back onto that isn’t work related. its been a hyperfixation for 12+ years? so drawing it at this point is just like personal art imo. some people have hobbies outside of art and only draw for their job! i think after attending classes for so long the idea of hobby turning into job feels extremely natural? also i enjoy doing it so thats a huge plus!

sorry this is SO long but i hope i answered your guys’ questions! if you have more just lmk!

#anon #ask #long post #im so so sorry this is like long as shit #ill literally tell you guys everything though art school should not feel like a mystery esp if ur planning to go into it!#Anonymous

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fuckcanontbh · 5 years

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confessions in plain sight *stozier*

So this is for @ceftali in @stoziersecretsanta gift exchange! Sorry if this is late for you, but it is officially two hours into Christmas for me! This is my first time writing these characters so I apologize for any OOC-ness that happens. This is also my first contribution to the fandom, I hope you enjoy!

Note: bold lettering is Richie’s handwriting, words in [brackets] are actual song lyrics. Does contain swearing.

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The sun beat down on the group, water dripped from their hair, and despite everything huge smiles were on everyone's faces as Mike told a story from the farm. Today was the first day of summer, so all of their backpacks crowded the space as well. Soon enough the group would be dry enough to get dressed and hang out in the club house until dinner time.

"Look, all I'm saying is that half of the problems in horror movies could be fixed if the characters weren't such idiots. I mean, really? If you see the murderer, why would you scream so he sees you?" Eddie's voice was the only noise as the group headed down into the club house. "Y-yeah. But you have to t-th-think that it's for dramatic e-effect. The character's can't always have a s-s-satis-satisfying ending." The group's leader argued further with Eddie, the two of them continuing their debate in a corner of the clubhouse.

"You're actually going to be starting school with us next year, Mike? Maybe now you'll actually believe us on how crazy school can be! All the stories we've told you about Richie and Bev are true, and Richie told me he's got some crazy stuff planned for our senior year!" Ben's excited voice came from another side of the clubhouse, Mike and Bev sitting in front of him on bean bags the group had added when winter made the ground too cold and hard to sit on comfortably. Stan watched all of this happen and then his eyes fell on Richie, who was unusually quiet as he sat in the hammock, reaching into his bookbag for something. "What are you looking for?" Richie jumped at Stan's voice, but quickly pulled a comic out of his bag. "Nothing but the newest X-Men comic, Stanny my boy, you'll never believe the kind of shit Storm cooks up this time!" Stan peered down at Richie, but the boy's grin seemed genuine so he shrugged and sat down, looking over Richie's shoulder. ~ "Alright, we'll see you tomorrow! Meeting at my house at four, right?" Beverly had already made her way up the ladder, but Ben was still waiting for an answer from Richie and Stan. "Haystack, you know I'll be there. Can't let your mom miss me too much!" Stan's hand reached out to smack Richie before he could stop it. "Tell everyone Richie has been uninvited." Ben simply laughed at their antics and shook his head as he climbed out into the little bit of sunlight left.

"We should probably head out soon, did you want to come over for dinner?" The blonde stood and brushed imaginary dust off his shirt and khakis. "Uh, hell yeah! Mrs. Uris makes the best food around here! Don't tell Ben I said that, his mom's cookies are good as hell." "Yeah, yeah. C'mon Trashmouth, I think mom is making meatballs and spaghetti squash." ~ Stan's house had been Richie Tozier free for about thirty minutes when Stan noticed Richie had left his bookbag next to his bed in his haste for dinner. The zipper was mostly undone and everything was one trip away from being all over Stan's floor. The boy rolled his eyes and bent down to zip it up when a small notebook caught his eyes. The book itself was simple on the outside, but it looked like a bunch of random things were also stuck into the book, making it thicker than it needed to be. It also looked like it was almost full, a slim part of the back of the notebook was still flat.

"Just leave it alone, Stan, it's none of your business." The boy brushed his teeth and put on his matching blue and white striped pajamas before climbing into bed. Minutes seemed to drag on forever before Stan stopped fighting himself and turned on his lamp before he grabbed the notebook. "It's probably just some dumb jokes Richie's thought of...or maybe some songs he's working on?" ~ 'Science HW due Thurs 28th' 'hang out after school @ quarry' '[Somewhere I'd never ever known, right at the back of my head, it hit me like a flashlight lighthouse beam of light]' ~ "Seems like it's just somewhere for him to put all his thoughts. Wonder who the song's about..." With the idea that the book was just a glance at Richie's mind as it worked a mile a minute, Stan continued reading. ~ 'Bev is the best!! girl offered me smokes even after i had to convince her skipping mrs. hepburns class was a good idea.' 'FUCK BOWERS' 'Math HW due Tues 4th' '[Cause you talk to me and it goes over my head...]' 'operation: get haystack the girl of his dreams walk her to class!! maybe walk her home sometimes? don't offer too much help bc bev hates that! write more of his sappy poems' 'gotta stop with the your mom jokes, not funny anymore' 'why is history so boring? REMINDER: ask ben to explain' 'start saving money-no more big spending at the arcade' ~ Stan scoffed at the thought of the curly haired boy giving up his favorite past time. "What's he even need to save money for anyway? He's already gotten that truck of his." ~ 'work @ 12-9 sat, sun and @ 5-12 mon, wed, fri' 'do i have an "it" factor? don't wanna miss out on making my mark on the world.' 'i don't even think he knows he does it. soft little smile on his face when he gets to a difficult problem, who does he think he is???' 'ma and dad fought all last night again. big bill asked what was up but i didn't want to talk about it. comedy is a good distraction' 'work @ 12-9 sat, sun and @ 5-12 mon, tues, wed, fri' 'glad i saved up some money, had to buy groceries again. ma's getting real bad again. haven't seen dad in a few days.' 'can't believe i got lucky enough to have such good friends. billy invited us all over for a horror movie marathon, ben and bev were put in charge of snacks. seems operation: get haystack the girl of his dreams is in motion. good for him! now if only i could get bill, mike, eddie, and stan lovers...' '[you've been on my mind boy girl since the flood]' 'ma passed out on the couch last night, guess it's a good thing i'm a lot bigger now. carried her to bed then went for a drive.' 'i swear he gets prettier the more i look at him' 'haystack just told me he scored a date!!!' 'HW due wed 18th' 'dad came home last night. got a good earful from him. maybe i should just stop talking? not like i got the nickname 'trashmouth' for something good. wonder if anyone would even notice' 'taught myself how to make chicken alfredo, actually got ma to eat with me.' 'i think i'm gonna tell him' 'nope. not gonna tell him. there's no way it would end good. out of all of our friends he's the least likely to want me' 'they say it is better to have loved and lost than never to love at all. but then it's 2 am and all you can think about is him, and you know he isn't thinking about you' ~ Stan snapped the book shut and quickly shoved it back into Richie's bag, thoughts flooding his mind. "Who is this boy Richie is crushing on? Is it Eddie? Eddie does yell at him a lot...and they have a bunch of classes together." "I didn't know things had gotten so bad at home. Mrs. Tozier used to be a saint.." "Is Richie okay?" He couldn't pin point why, but as he clicked his lamp off, Stan's chest hurt, but before a tear could escape his eyes he rolled over and pulled his covers up to his chin. ~ "Hey Rich, you left this at my house last night." Stan held the bag in-between them, his eyes refusing to meet Richie's, his chest still tight like the night before. "Stan the Man! My savior, got some important goods in here!" The blonde's eyebrows raised, finally looking at Richie's face just for the boy to look away quickly. "Can't lose my comic so soon now can I?"

"My mom made cookies!!" Ben walked into the living room, plate piled with chocolate chip cookies in his hands. "Ben Handsome, you are nothing if not the son of a saint, if you know what I mean." Richie dived for the plate, one cookie already in his mouth and three in his hands.

"Beep, beep, Richie!" Eddie scoffed and bumped the boy's shoulder, taking one cookie from Ben's plate. Stan watched as Richie's shoulders deflated, and the brunet ate his second cookie much slower. Before he could say anything Mike and Beverly's voices took everyone's attention towards the TV.

"We're not doing more horror movies, we did that like two weeks ago!" Beverly was swatting at the movies in Mike's hands, trying to reach across him to put her VHS into the VCR player. "She's not w-wr-wrong Mike. Let's just do the Disney marathon." At Bill's words Mike sighed and gave in, backing away from the TV so suddenly that Beverly fell forward slightly.

"Did you see that foul play my good man? Foul play I say!" Richie nudged Bill just to be shrugged off as the boy grabbed a cookie and moved to sit on the couch. ~ "I think I'm gonna go ahead and head home you guys. I'm getting one of those notorious Tozier headaches." Richie stood behind the couch as the credits to Bambi played, bookbag slung over his shoulder. "Yeah, yeah, bye Richie." "See ya, Trashmouth." "I think I'm gonna head out too, gotta help my mom clean up a bit before my aunt stays with us." "Dang, bye Stan." "Have fun with that Stan!" ~ "Hey Rich, think you can give me a ride?" The boy nodded and started his truck, hurriedly throwing a couple things behind the bench seat of his truck.

"Only the best for a prince, amiright?" If Stan didn't know better he'd say Richie's ears had gone a little pink. His truck started and he pulled out of Ben's driveway onto the road.

"Are you actually getting a headache Richie? Cause if not, I wanna talk.." His hands gripped the steering wheel a little tighter but Richie put on a smile and glanced at Stan.

"Always knew you could see through me. Don't know if we can have this conversation without your mother though, she wanted to be the one to break the news."

"Oh shut up asshole." Despite his words Stan felt himself smiling as Richie snickered.

"I just want to say I'm sorry first. Because I shouldn't have pried. But I thought it was just gonna be stupid stuff. Maybe some black mail material."

"Wait, you read my fucking journal? Stanley that's fucked dude! I would never do that to you. I can't believe you went through my bag. Guess straight cut Stan isn't as honest a man as I thought. Dude, what is your problem?"

A red light had stopped them, and Richie was able to look at Stan in the eye now, his brown eyes angry, but also coming off as slightly panicked.

"Look, I really didn't mean to get into your heavy shit. I thought it was just gonna be full of those little doodles you do in class and some new song lyrics. I didn't read too much of it Just a couple pages, maybe three tops! It's just got me worried about you."

"What did you read Stanley? Worried I'm sick? I can't really say I'm surprised." Brown eyes rolled and he clicked his tongue as he pulled forward.

"Sick? What- no. I'm worried about your mom and dad."

"You know that's none of your fucking business. We're just fine at the Tozier residence. Nothing has changed, Went works all the time and Ma takes care of the house. Don't start talking like you know anything about them. Get out of my car, Uris."

"Rich-"

"No, I said I'd give you a ride home, and here we are. The Uris residence. Go help your mom clean up and figure out how to stay out of other people's business."

Stan sighed and hung his head as he got out of the truck, only turning his head towards the street when Richie sped off, a cloud of smoke following him. ~ "Beverly, I really messed up the other day." "Sweetheart, Richie is known for the theatrics, don't let it get you down." "Yeah, Stan, that boy is like a rubber ball, he'll bounce back."

A shaky hand worked it's way through blonde curls, brown eyes bounced around the room, landing on Bev sitting in the window smoking, the radio sitting next to her turned down quiet enough for them to talk over, and Mike sitting criss cross on the bed.

"Stan, what even happened? I have never seen you this worried over some little fight with Richie."

"Look, I know it was wrong, but I accidentally read his very personal journal." Stan cringed as he said the words, already feeling Mike's eyes on him when Beverly whipped her head in his direction.

"How do you accidentally read someone's journal man?" "What did you read Stan?

Mike and Bev spoke at the same time, and Bev's cigarette was out before Stan could explain.

"Look, he's just got some shit going on at home, and he doesn't want to bother us with it...andIthinkhemighthaveacrushonEddie." "What was that last part?" "I think he mighthaveacrushonEddie." "Stan, breathe sweetheart we aren't gonna yell at you." "I think he might have a crush on Eddie and I'm not sure why I'm upset about it."

Mike and Bev shared a knowing look over Stan's down tilt head, Bev's eyebrows raised in a silent question that Mike answered with a nod.

"You may be one of the smartest most oblivious person I've met Stanley Uris." "You've had that boy wrapped around your finger since you became friends in second grade." "Guess you just didn't realize he had you around his finger as well."

Mike's words stung at first, but when Beverly pointed out who Richie's crush was, Stan's face lit up like a light. His cheeks dusted with pink as he met their eyes.

"You're being serious. Fuck, now I've really messed up. He thinks I hate him!" ~ "This is such a bad fucking idea. He hates you right now Stan." With a sigh the boy threw the first stone at the second floor window. It took three stones for Richie Tozier to open his window, and only one glance to see Stan before he was retreating again.

"Wait, Richie! Please, I just want to talk. Can we go for a ride?" Stan watched with bated breath as the shadow at the window hovered another moment before it retreated.

"Called that one."

And then Richie was climbing down the siding of his house.

"Be careful! Why didn't you use the front door dumbass?" All Stan got in response was an eye roll and a thumb pointing to the car in the drive way, Went was home.

"Oh." "Yeah, oh. Let's go. Been itching to go somewhere anyway." ~ The only sound in the truck was the two boys' breathing and a soft static from the radio. Stan swallowed air and watched as they passed the movie theatre.

"Look, I really am sorry. I just want you to talk to us more. You're acting like some shitty parenting is where we draw the line, have you completely forgotten that fucking clown?"

"I know. Sorry for being a brat the other day. I just don't like people to see that stuff, I have a reputation ya know? Comedian first, dumbass second, and softie never." Richie turned left, leading to the outskirts of town.

"Yeah, wouldn't want to ruin this perfect "class clown" persona you've got going on."

"Stanley Uris, did you just use air quotes to describe my entire personality to me?"

A chuckle escaped Richie and the truck air suddenly felt much lighter. "You're a lot more than that you know. You're more than some shitty but perfect timed your mom jokes. We keep you around for a lot more than a laugh." "What else am I good at Stan? All I do is mouth off and tell bad jokes." Brown curls came down from Richie's bun as he shook his head, leading the two of them past a sign asking visitors to come back to Derry.

"They may be bad jokes, but they still make us laugh. You're always the first one to put aside time for any of us, all we have to do is ask. And- stop shaking your head. Who took the time when we were all younger to listen to Eddie explain which of his inhalers were for what and how to administer them? Who learned how to cut hair just to help Bev save money and keep it trimmed? Who helped Mike shear the sheep when Spring started just so he could hang out with us sooner? Who practiced endless tongue twister with Bill to help with his stutter? Who did all that? Richie Tozier did. You give us everything and never expect anything back. All I wanna do is give back. God knows you deserve it."

"Hey now, don't bring the big man into this conversation." Despite the levity of what he was saying, Stan could hear the tears on the other boy's voice.

"I didn't mean to make you cry. You just have such a big heart, and I think sometimes you don't know what to do with it...I saw the notes about a boy. You know we wouldn't judge you for that! Shit, none of us batted an eye when Big Bill came out as bisexual, so why would we care. You deserve to be happy, Rich. I just want you to be happy."

The more he spoke, the quieter Stan's voice became and the louder his blood rushed in his ears. Silence enveloped the truck again, and soon the tires came to a stop over a patch of grass.

"Did you mean all of that?"

Richie Tozier was not a small boy anymore, he was all long limbs of 6'2, and had developed a jawline sharp enough to cut a man, but right now, in the dim light of his dashboard, swallowed by a grey hoodie and hunched over, Richie Tozier reminded Stan of that scared boy in the sewers.

"Every last word. And I think you should know that a little birdie told me that I might be the inspiration for some of those lovely lyrics in your book..." Glasses nearly flew off Richie's face with how quickly he shot his head up, worried brown eyes magnified by the lenses.

"Bev, that bitch."

"I wouldn't say that quite yet. She pointed something else out to me too. She said I've had you wrapped around my finger since we met in second grade, but she also said that you've had me wrapped around your finger for a while now too. And I've got to say, she's right. Can't believe she knows me better than both of us. But yeah, Rich, you've had me wrapped around your finger since you told my mom at age six that she had better get used to you because you'd be around for a while."

Richie put the truck in park, unbuckled and shifted to be more in the middle of the truck, and the yellow of the radio highlighted the pink on his cheeks perfectly. "Stan...I don't really know what to say. Still can't believe she ratted me out like that."

"Say you're gonna let us in more. Say she was right. Say you want to give this a shot.”

"I want to give this a shot. I'm pretty sure I've been in love with you since we were twelve." A warm hand gently took Stan's as he spoke, squeezing gently before he scooted just a bit closer.

"Slow down there Tozier, I've only just opened my eyes to the fact that you might be it for me, let me catch up before we start tossing the L word around. Buy me dinner first at least."

A genuine chuckle and Richie moved back to his seat, his hand still in Stan's. "How bout a late dinner at-", brown eyes glanced at the clock,"-nearly one a.m?" "Lead the way, Tozier. I'll be right with you."

#stozier #it #secret santa #this is my first contribution to the fandom #im so nervous rn #send help #thanks

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melto · 5 years

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man...i really need to fix my fucking schedule. i really cant do being on campus everyday for like 15 hours everyday with no breaks....like half of the stress is rehersal which i need to be more focused in bc im getting credits and then i have two jobs and im at max hours and i cant quit the sup job bc i need that money and i dont wanna quit my gay job bc its the only way im commected to the community and doing stuff that makes me feel good but i cant do this ive been having meltdowns everyweek bc im so stressed with everything plus hw for my other classes which one is a high lvl lx class and it takes SO much out of class work and since thats my focus i HAVE to be good and then i have to make time for friends and cleaning my home and shit and i am just streching myself so thin rn and there is really nothing i can do to like. fix it.

#ingore me today was just rough #news with isaac

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thesportssoundoff · 5 years

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“Good doesn’t matter sometimes.” A UFC 243 Preview

Joey

September 30th

You ever have a show that's kind of not good but it also kind of doesn't matter? BEHOLD UFC 243! This card is....not good. It also doesn’t really even matter if it is or isn’t good. While UFC 242 was not "good" on paper, it at least featured a lot of fights in a good division. This is a lower level ESPN+ card without those top two fights and with Holm-Rocky off. Thankfully cards are judged as a whole and so Israel Adesanya-Robert Whittaker and Daniel Hooker-Al Iaquinta really do buoy it up to moderately acceptable level. IF ANYTHING, it doesn't matter. Really truthfully it doesn't matter. This show is all about the scene and the story of Australia getting its second ever stadium show headlined by an Aussie and a Kiwi in a major main event. It's a moment in time and sports are all about moments. The UFC has done little to promote this (or boost the card up) mostly because they've already sold close to 40,000 tickets with a week to go. Also I think they realized that Robert Whittaker is abysmal at fight promotion and there's not much you can do with him. Either way we got plenty to talk about here including a killer title unification bout.

Fights: 11

Debuts: Bruno Silva, Brad Riddell, Jamie Mullarkey, Zarah Fairn Dos Santos, Maki Pitolo, Justin Tafa, Yorgan de Castro

Fight Changes/Injury Cancellations: 2 (Holly Holm vs Rocky Pennington CANCELLED/Max Holloway vs Alexander Volkanovski CANCELLED)

Headliners (fighters who have either main evented or co-main evented shows in the UFC): 5 (Israel Adesanya, Robert Whittaker, Al Iaquinta, Dan Hooker, Tai Tuivasa)

Fighters On Losing Streaks in the UFC: 1 (Tai Tuivasa)

Fighters On Winning Streaks in the UFC: 3 (Robert Whittaker, Israel Adesanya, Dhiego Lima)

Main Card Record Since Jan 1st 2017 (in the UFC): 23-9

Robert Whittaker- 3-0 Israel Adesanya- 6-0 Al Iaquinta- 5-1 Dan Hooker- 2-2 Tai Tuivasa- 3-2 Sergey Spivak- 0-1 Luke Jumeau- 2-1 Dhiego Lima- 2-2

Fights By Weight Class (yearly number here):

Welterweight- 3 (58) Heavyweight- 2 (29) Lightweight- 2 (64) Women’s Featherweight- 1 (8) Women’s Flyweight- 1 (30) Middleweight- 1 (36) Bantamweight- 1 (51)

Light Heavyweight- (37) Women’s Bantamweight- (18) Featherweight- (48) Women’s Strawweight- (24) Flyweight- (14)

2019 Number Tracker

Debuting Fighters (32-52-1)- Bruno Silva, Brad Riddell, Jamie Mullarkey, Zarah Fairn Dos Santos, Maki Pitolo, Justin Tafa, Yorgan de Castro

Short Notice Fighters (27-35)-

Second Fight (49-32)- Rostem Akman, Callan Potter, Sergey Spivak

Cage Corrosion (Fighters who have not fought within a year of the date of the fight) (20-33-1)- Robert Whittaker, Luke Jumeau

Undefeated Fighters (33-35-2)- Israel Adesanya, Justin Tafa, Yorgan de Castro

Fighters with at least four fights in the UFC with 0 wins over competition still in the organization (11-8)-

Weight Class Jumpers (Fighters competing outside of the weight class of their last fight even if they’re returning BACK to their “normal weight class”) (26-18)- Callan Potter

Twelve Precarious Ponderings

1- Is this fight a story of overly rested vs overworked? Robert Whittaker since 2017 has had three fights. Since July of 2018, he's had two fights. He's had a lot of injuries but what's more he's had a lot of tough fights. Of his last five fights, the easiest fight was a pretty grueling fifteen minute affair with Rafael Natal. He had a one round firefight with Derek Brunson, a pretty taxing yet dominant win over Jacare and then the two violent wars with Yoel Romero that went the full distance. I am going to believe that no matter how long you get to recover, a guy simply can't spend 50 minutes trading heat with Yoel Romero and come out unscathed. On the other hand, Israel Adesanya basically got a crash course in MMA in the UFC. He learned on the job while defeating legitimate serious competition like Derek Brunson, Brad Tavares and Anderson Silva. Including his debut in February of 2018, he's fought six times and while most of those fights could be categorized as walkthroughs, his last fight vs Kelvin Gastelum featured him hurt and knocked down for the first time in his UFC career. To his credit, he came back with one of the best fifth round performances in MMA history when he knocked Gastelum around for about five minutes including folding him up on two different occasions. That said this is a heavy workload for a guy with an extensive kickboxing history plus coming off his first seriously exhausting fight. Adesanya has not taken a lot of damage to this point but cage time is cage time. Whittaker has fought seldom but when he has been, they've been pretty violent. Is Whittaker underprepared or is Adesanya overworked?

2- Adesanya tends to be pretty consistent throughout a fight but his two UFC main events that went five rounds suggest that he's REAL tough to get going against in rounds 3-5. The fact that Gastelum had him in bad straights in the fourth round is really more of a testament to how great Kelvin Gastelum is than anything else. Whittaker is hard to gauge because he tore his knee up pretty badly in the first round vs Romero but in most of his fights, he's a pretty great starter who finishes well in the third round. He's got great takedown defense, timely takedowns of his own when he needs them and he more often than not keeps a consistent offensive pace despite throwing A LOT of heat. As such assuming Adesanya doesn't catch Whittaker cold (a problem that stymied him vs the likes of Wonderboy and Brunson), we should get a pretty fun chess match between the most twitched up 185 lber in Adesanya and the guy with the most consistent kicking game output in Whittaker.

3- How long will it take Adesanya to go from fighting a dwarf at 185 lbs to Whittaker who has a bit more of your basic 185 lber build?

4- One thing Robert Whittaker has struggled with is when guys who are tick faster than him succeed in closing the space with offense. Yoel Romero and Derek Brunson went plum loco to get inside offensively and when Whittaker is blitzed, he has a real hard time defensively getting out of the way of the wild stuff. He's also a sucker for an overhand right. I imagine he knows this and whenever he gets a sense Adesanya is about to close the distance with his hands, a takedown attempt is coming.

5- Is Dan Hooker the official most violent man at 155 lbs now? I think he's had a finish in every fight he's had since going up in weight to 155 lbs in the UFC.

6- How many more fights do we have Al Iaquinta for before we start hearing about his contract and he takes off on us again? Enjoy dude while we got him.

7- Who is going to be the crowd favorite in the main event?

8- Two Australians with similar storylines on this card are in need of a win. The first is Tai Tuavasa. The UFC's Mark Hunt protege got off to a hot start in his UFC career, joining elite company (no, really. Guys like JDS and Cain) with back to back finish wins in his first two UFC fights. From there? He got some of his weaknesses checked vs Andrei Arlovski. He still rallied, buckled down and outworked Arlovski down the stretch en route to a decision win. From there he took on JDS who survived a scare before finishing Tuavasa in Australia in the second round. No biggie! Everybody loses to JDS unless you're super elite. That said, we started to notice more and more questionable things about Tuavasa. His training seemed somewhat limited and he seemed to really lack a Plan B if his blitz and clinch strategy didn't work out. The problems continued against Blagoy Ivanov who seemingly just stalled Tai out on offense and did just enough offensively to snag a decision. Tuavasa is in a real do or die scenario with Sergey Spivak in what seems like a real serious showcase fight. For Megan Anderson? I guess I'm not sure what you can say. She was signed to fight Cyborg, got yanked from that fight for a variety of reasons, made her debut vs Holly Holm and got swamped on the ground. She rallied to beat Cat Zingano in a real weird fight where she incidentally swiped Zingano with a toenail on a head kick and it seemed like we were all systems go on a Megan Anderson hype train again. Then she got Felicia Spencer and got absolutely steamrolled on the turf again. At this point, Anderson seems only capable of winning a fight on her terms and seems incapable of how to ensure she can dictate THOSE terms. She'll get a chance against debuting Zarah Fairn.

9- I know it'll be trendy to pretend he's no good but I'm still thinking Jake Matthews might have something to offer up at 170 lbs. I thought Rostem Akman, the world's hairiest man, had some good stuff to offer up vs Sergey Khandozhko en route to a decision loss. If Matthews continues to have issues on the feet with guys who work the body, Akman figures to test some of that.

10- Dhiego Lima on a UFC PPV. Anything is possible in the year of our lord 2019.

11- NEW HWS ALERT! Yorgan de Castro and Justin Tafa make their debuts on the prelims and it's actually not a half bad fight. Yorgan is off DWCS where he smoked uber prospect Alton Meeks while Justin Tafa's the younger brother of a Glory HW kickboxer.

12- Curious to see what Brad Riddell looks like down 15 lbs in his UFC debut.

#MMA #UFC #Adesanya #Whittaker

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spontaneousstupidity · 5 years

Text

This is a rant to no one about many things, mainly school

so my math teacher

i hate her

"you chose to be in this class"

like no??

i didnt??

my old math teacher signed for me to be in this class??

and i need a third math credit??

"oh didn't anyone tell you that you can get your algebra credit tranferred so you dont need to take a third year"

NO???

legit so many people were mad when she said this

no one tells us shit about credits and classes after freshman year

also

when we grade hw she asks if theres any problems they want her to go over

so this kid said yeah and asked about a problem

keep in mind this was last nights hw

while going through it she sees that only that kid and maybe one other was copying it down and got mad

"if you don't copy down what im saying and pay attention im just going to stop."

like???

it was a pretty easy problem??

we already did it?

y'know

as homework????

next we have my english teacher

now i like her as a person

however i dont like her as a teacher

typically english is just a repeat of the year before with new vocab but this year we have sorta different things like rhetorical analysis essays and shit

now i didnt have a problem in the beginning bc i just used a typical explanitory outline but ik some people were having problems

they said they didnt understand the instructions and that they were really vague and used complex word that she then defined with more complex words

and at first i didnt get it

but oof

as soon as we breached what i saw as a new topic i didnt understand any of it

and none of her instruction helped

and none of the people i know understand it very well either

(which is weird bc these are all hella smart people and many of them are in other AP classes besides this one)

less of a teacher thing but kinda still is

now i absolutely love my orchestra teacher she is amazing

now recently there has been some violin drama that i think @i-failed-my--turing-test could better explain as i am a mere cello

but lately our first cellist is constantly on her phone

while she used to be on it often now there are times when she doesn't put it down even when it's time to play and come in about five measure after we start to play

now im usually not picky when it comes to section leaders bc ive given up hope on finding one that leads us the way i them to

(our last one was an amzing cellist and really sweet person who i miss but she still didn't really lead us in)

but ive been getting more and more annoyed, it seems like everyone else is told to be off their phone but its fine when she does it

like i'd understand if there was like a family emergency or something but i see her on snapchat and social media

and nothing???has been done??

idk guys

wow a new topic

cute costumes.

i hate seeing so many cute costume options but few regular options

like maybe the expectation to be in a cute costume by my mom doesnt help

but still

i dont like it

let me wear smuged and gorey makeup instead of smoky eyes and red lips like im a zombie mom i dont need to be cute

anyway im tired now but im probably going to do this again at some point

if you don't wanna see it i recommend blacklisting #leo rants

#leo rants #rip #sorry not sorry

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thunder-birb · 6 years

Text

The 5 times Tamaki accidentally confessed to Mirio and the one time he didn’t have to

Mini Series Part IV

Thud. Thud. Thud. The sound of knuckles knocking against the hardwood door beckons me to get up, but the weight of disappointment clinging to my heart keeps my feet rooted to the tiled floor and back against the ceiling mere centimeters away.

“No one is here” I reply, which people will probably take as a joke, because clearly someone has said something, but if you know me, then you know that I am hardly joking. No one is a reflection of how I am not anyone worthy. Just a nobody who can’t measure up to the standards of such a prestigious school and should have never gotten accepted in the first place. I am a waste of space. A nobody. No One.

“Well, I thought it would be in no one’s best interest to know that they seem to have forgotten about their prime member who is also feeling like utter shit and would actually like his best friend to talk to... At least for now, before he has to smile and pretend he’s okay to all of his family watching back home...” that carefully guarded voice finally breaks near the end and with a deep breath, I rise up and twist the door knob open.

Pulling the door behind me almost feels instinctual with him; like I’m always shedding another layer that I usually have mountains of when it comes to other people. Yet, with him I find myself bearing my soul, even at times when I feel like I am sinking, slipping away into a nobody. Maybe it’s because when I open the door, his eyes don’t smile at me like everyone’s does in that reflection of pity and concern. No. He never once considers me as someone weak, or beneath him in some level. He sees me as an equal, someone who despite their own demons can be a shoulder to cry on and can be strong enough for the both of us.

And surely enough when the door is wide enough for my head to peak out, his eyes are not on me. They are downcast on the floor, shoulders sagging heavy like the frown I know is on his face. He isn’t just here to check up on me, but also to confide in me. No one gives me that power to heal and people won’t believe how much I crave to be needed sometimes.

“Mirio--” I cry out, feeling the dry scratch of my vocal cords after I abandoned all forms of comfort in favor of sitting here in the pool of my own loneliness and regrets.

“Tamaki, how have I fallen so behind? I can’t believe that there’s such a wide gap between me and the rest of our class when in the beginning the possibilities were infinite...” Mirio clenches his fist, face finally rising above mine in utter dismay. There are wrinkles on his forehead, far more than I have ever seen before, his blue button eyes blurring from tears begging to be released and cheeks red from boiling over in frustration. He blinks hard, eyes finally letting the water escape and sighs deeply, further letting go of all the pent up emotions he’s been keeping to himself.

Once again, I am baffled by how comfortable Mirio is with me. How can he not spare himself? Even just a little bit, so I don’t see all the imperfections or the rawness of his core? My heart sinks deeper, burying itself beneath the ground with all his pain that I know so well and fear more than anything. Yet, here he is unashamed with being seen. Something I could never ever do and which is why I was in the class room by myself in the first place.

Feeling like I might also start losing myself in the dulling ache of dissatisfaction, I stop myself from overthinking and wrap my arm around him in an embrace that feels unbalanced with the way my arm can barely engulf him, meanwhile his arms are still at his sides. I slowly move my hand up and down his back, and Mirio relaxes into me with his head resting on my shoulder.

“I know... It’s like no matter how much you try to catch up, you just end up three steps back from where you started. Always running to an end you will never reach” my eyes start welling up again and I can’t just hear the sounds of the crowd filling my ears like in the arena, but I can also feel the cameras watching punctiliously and seeing every single bad move I make. I can hear their criticism, see the judgment in their eyes and it pulls me deeper into the side of my mind that only knows self-destruction.

“With the way I’m going, that’s a sure bet” Mirio falters and for once the sadness overpowers his sunny skies. It’s like a dark angry cloud has drove the sun to a corner and ubiquitously covered the blues above.

But I think people forget that it has to rain sometimes. No one can always have the rays of light in their smile and Mirio isn’t any different. So, I hold him even though my heart is aching just as much as his. I find that sometimes being strong for someone else can fill the emptiness and by the end of it, he’s actually the one holding me. It’s a weird dynamic between us, but I guess the road has always been so bumpy that we just know how to comfort one another or when one of us is reaching his limit.

🌦️🌦️🌦️

“Ugh. You two better not start again! Especially you Amajiki! Or I’m gonna wind slap you so hard, you’ll be smiling for the rest of your happy life!” Hadou warns wagging her accusatory pointer finger first at Mirio and then at me. “We have done enough damage for the rest of our lives! And I want nothing more but big fake smiles on your handsome faces, got it?” she glares at both of us hard, testing our mental stability. Then, at no sign of us breaking down any minute, she smiles and slips naturally in between.

She encircles her left arm around my right arm and her right around Mirio’s left, connecting us into a bond that started ever since our very first Sports Festival at UA.

We didn’t do so well then either and one sad retreat into the grassy fields outside became three frustrated individuals crying their disappointed hearts out. Of course I was the one sad male who started it all, ‘a natural trendsetter’ Mirio would joke, which actually got Hadou to laugh out loud and broke the triangle of sadness that reigned on us.

Mirio found me right after his group match elimination and we just laid on the greenery, while we watched the clouds drift by like in middle school. Hadou came along by accident and just like a gush of fresh air, she brought many revelations to light.

“Hey! hey! did you know that when the olympics were still a thing, students our age who also competed had to face the pressure of millions of people scrutinizing their every move??” she pats both of our arms to get our attention, not that her being with us was already news enough...well mostly to me.

“You don’t say?” Mirio commented used to amusing Hadou’s little bits of trivia she loved to throw in every chance she got.

“Oh sure! Many of them also couldn’t shake off the high standards expected of them and some even took years to finally cope with the pressure! But that didn’t mean adults didn’t slip up once in while or got stuck in a rut in their competitions, you know? So, really this--” she gestured vaguely at us being outside and the rest of the world focused at Sports Festival inside. “Is actually quite conventional” she supplied with a small smile.

“I mean we’re still human” she continued as she flipped her blue bangs away from her face, brought her hands together and hugged her legs in a tight squeeze. “And mistakes will always happen, but it’s how we learn to get around them that really tests our capabilities as future heroes” she sighed like she was physically shrugging off all her tribulations and then resolutely laid down between us with her arms stretched out.

Mirio and I looked at each other, mouth agape and for the first time of knowing Hadou did we finally saw through her. She wasn’t just a curious busybody that everyone pegged her for. She was insightful and curious because she loved to learn and understand the things around her. She was also the only one that intrigued Mirio enough to learn some of our lessons, which was no easy task since Mirio generally preferred to be out in the field.

I guess people just never gave her enough credit and for guys like me and Mirio, that was something we knew all too well. So, that was basically how the Nobody’s Only Club was born. We really started it to cheer ourselves up after a not so successful first try at the Sports Festival, but it became this support group that reminded us we weren’t alone. And with that we just inherently became good friends.

“C’mon you guys! Yuyu is probably on her way to the HW by now” Hadou drags us both and I almost trip over them not aware that we’ve been walking this whole time and now approaching the school’s gate.

“We’re going to HW?” I ask, confused and Hadou slaps Mirio’s arm twice.

“I told you he was zoning us out” Hadou shakes her head at me, while Mirio shrugs at her and mouths an “I tried” at me. I have a terrible habit of being in my own head a lot and sometimes it stems from me not wanting to be part of the conversations in the first place. Hadou thinks I should practice talking with them anyway, while Mirio fills in the silence and covers for me when he knows I’ve drifted.

“Sorry Hadou. I’m still working on it, but why are we going to HW? I thought--”

“Well after you told me Mirio has ‘the voice of an angel’ I figured we should go get some chicken and sing our hearts out at the new Karaoke place a few stores down!” she wraps her arms around us and jumps in excitement. Meanwhile, I choke on air and start coughing, refusing to look at either of them.

Hadou starts patting my back in concern and I steal a quick glance at Mirio, who of course catches me looking at him because I am choking to death. I fight the burning warmth rising on my cheeks and try not to think about the slight tint on his ears. He tilts his head like he doesn’t know what to say about the whole ‘angel’ thing and honestly I don’t either. I didn’t even say that exactly, but I just keep drawing out my cough even though it doesn’t even itch anymore, so I won’t have to say anything at all.

Sometimes you gotta choose your battles and this one just isn’t it.

🍗🍗🍗

Already, distracted by the scenery around us, Hadou talks a mile a minute about all the questions she has for the world. Mirio, being his amicable self either makes a goofy comment about it or actually has an answer to her endless ramble. Meanwhile, I watch the sky above me and pay attention to every single thing being said. I’m nodding when I’m suppose to and letting Hadou swing our connected arms back and forth as we continue our walk.

We fall into a comfortable pace and soon the surrounding trees and the occasional houses are replaced by the tall skyscrapers of all sorts as we move closer to the core of the city. I always liked that UA was up in the hills and away from the stresses of the town. It makes it easier to disconnect from the world sometimes and just focus on our daily hero lessons at hand.

“Hey we’re almost there!” Hadou points out, walking with an extra skip in her step.

“Oh yeahhh! I’m getting pretty hangry too” Mirio wiggles his brows and I chuckle because it reminds me of Johnny Bravo when he is about to do something stupid. Mirio beams at me, happy he made someone laugh and Hadou looks at us like we’re weird.

“It’s like you guys don’t even need words to communicate! How advance~” she comments with a smile that I don’t quite understand. I raise the collar of my uniform and burry my cheeks under them, looking straight ahead.

“Haha! You make us sound like an alien life source!” Mirio laughs, back to his old bubbly self. We keep walking getting closer to the shop until we make a familiar turn over to HW.

Upon spotting Yuyu scrolling through her phone by the entrance, Hadou breaks free from our arms and runs towards her friend. Yuyu clearly amused by her friend’s antics, turns to her side to hide her smirk and pretends she doesn’t hear Hadou approaching her.

Mirio and I trail behind Hadou and we watch as she jumps at Yuyu and screams happily. It definitely scares the people coming out, but Hadou is easily excitable, especially when Yuyu is involved. They hug and exchange greetings like they haven’t seen each other just yesterday. Then, Yuyu waves us down and motions for us to get in.

We find a cozy spot in the back of the store and wait for our order of their large hot wings and drumstick combo with 4 large sides. It’s a little crowded and my skin tingles with nerves, but Yuyu and Hadou keep the conversation going, while Mirio’s fingers drum an unfamiliar beat at the empty table in front of us.

The black plastic buzzer blinks red after 10 minutes and furiously shakes on the table. Mirio does his silly celebratory dance when he’s excited mostly about food and offers to carry our order over to us. Hadou, Yuyu and I stay seated and watch Mirio wait for his turn to get our meal.

“You guys think I should compete at the Beauty Contest again? I kinda don’t want a repeat of last year...” Hadou pouts, dejected eyes now concentrating on the table, which causes Yuyu to stop playing with her long blue hair.

“What do you mean should I? Of course you should Nejire! You’re perfect for the Beauty contest!” Yuyu squeezes Hadou’s shoulders, and Hadou shakes her shoulders to take Yuyu’s hands off.

“You’re only saying that because you’re my friend” she turns her head away from Yuyu and refuses to accept her encouragement.

“Hey! Because I’m your friend, my opinion should matter more! Besides I know you best and I’m sure you can win it this year!” she turns Hadou’s chair to face her and squeezes her cheeks, so she looks up. They stare at each other, both not backing down and I wonder for a moment if I could ever have such a stare down with anyone without feeling like I’m being cut open.

“Fine! That’s one vote” Hadou concedes, smile betraying her, but then she turns her head and looks at me. “What about you Amajiki, what do you think I should do it?” she asks and I feel an immense pressure coming from Yuyu and not just because she’s kindly placed her hand on my shoulder.

“Yeah Amajiki isn’t she perfect for it?” she nods at me, big eyes waiting for me to confirm.

“Well um--- I understand your hesitance Hadou because to Yuyu you can do no wrong, but I also agree that you should give it another try” I smile at her, nervous that the buzzing around the store suddenly dies out once I decide to open my mouth.

“See??? Even Amajiki says yes!” Yuyu jumps and gives me a hi-five I nearly miss. “And you got that right! Nejire is way too cute, so it’s hard to find any fault in her!” she pats Hadous head and Hadou in turn smiles even wider. She hugs me and I nearly jump off my seat from the suddenness, but just let her squeeze tighter anyway.

“But hey! You’re one to talk Amajiki! I believe I recall someone doing the exact same thing when anyone says anything bad about Togata! Like remember that time with Burokku-san?” Yuyu points out, voice louder than it should be in this other random silent moment in the store. I peer over at the cashier and of course that’s when Mirio is taking our order from the cashier’s hands.

“What no-- I-- I didn’t do that-” I stiffen under Hadou’s hold and panic because dammit Mirio is coming right this way and this really isn’t the time.

“OoOoOoh! I remember that! What was it you said again--? Hmmm~~ It was oh-so-very brave and chivalrous too!” Hadou does this elaborate thinking face that nags at my sanity and Yuyu annoyingly winks at me before immersing in her own thoughtful face. Kill me now.

I take a big sigh and stop my legs from shaking under the table. “Fine. I may have shared a worded altercation with that---guy, but that blockhead had it coming and you guys would have done the same” I reply quickly, schooling my features as best as I can, already knowing how they get when I act more flustered. Not this time you two! I won’t let you get to me!

“Oooooh, so you admit you think Togata can do no wrong in your eyes?” Yuyu smirks sealing in her trap and the little control I have over the situation disappears right before my eyes.

“No I--- I never said that!” I jump out my seat startled and can already feel the attention its drawing. I need to leave.

“Never said what?” surely enough that’s when Mirio gets to us with the food neatly packed in a plastic bag and a tray filled with our drinks in his hands. “And why is Tamaki all red?” he turns his head to look at me and I squeak turning away from him.

“I don’t know we were just talking about you and now he’s all flustered” Nejire supplies and I honestly don’t know if she’s still playing with me or just being her regular blunt self. Yuyu laughs all the same and I tighten my hands into fists wishing to disappear. Words of advise; don’t have friends.

“I’m gonna go throw up” I say, speed walking to the bathroom without awaiting their reply and indeed feeling queasy. He didn’t hear anything did he?

“You guys have to stop teasing him so much! ” is the last I hear from Mirio before I drown them out and open the door. I splash my face with water three times and avoid the mirror. I already know I probably look like a tomato. No need to feel worse about it.

I do my sister’s breathing exercises not really sure why I’m even freaking out. It’s nothing. Just mindless teasing. They do this all the time. To me. To Mirio. To other random victims in our class. It’s nothing to freak out about. No. Totally not.

After I feel like the color has drained from my face and I can go outside without turning as red as a well-cooked lobster, I step out of the bathroom and brave myself for more teasing. However, once I step outside the bathroom, Hadou and Yuyu are nowhere to be seen. Mirio though is sitting in our same spot, waving me over.

“Hey Tamaki, are you alright?” Mirio gets up when I finally reach him and I shove my hands into my pocket, so he doesn’t see me shaking a little.

“Yeah I’m great” I lie and I know he knows I’m lying because even to me I sounded unsure.

“They didn’t really tell me what happened, but you know they just like to tease you right?” Mirio opens the door for us even with the bag of food and tray with our sodas in his hands.

“I know… Unfortunately they think it’s fun, but don’t worry, I’m used to it” I reassure him and myself, taking the tray of drinks from his hands as we try to catch up with Hadou and Yuyu way ahead of us already. “It’s just this time--”

Mirio doesn’t say anything, but the way his eyes are following my every word I know he wants to know what was said earlier. I get choked up with the mere thought of almost telling him of all freaking people and try to think of something else to say.

“This time--uhm they were uh--” my mind is malfunctioning drawing that dreaded gray screen with the eerie noise as I’m trying to think of anything plausible to say. C’mon just make something up.

“Saying that---er---” we stop in front of the Karaoke place with Hadou and Yuyu already inside probably reserving our room. I look around trying to think of anything to say and that’s when my eyes fall at his face and then his hair, glistening under the orangey yellows of the setting sun. That’s it!

“Your hair!” I yell without thinking.

“My what??” he tilts his head in confusion and honestly Mirio, ditto because I, too have no idea where I am going with this. “You guys were talking about my hair?”

“Well just hair in general and uhhh--- you know like the length of it” I try to keep it vague until a reasonable idea pops up in my head, but Mirio saves me before I find something ridiculous to say.

“Were you guys talking about that time I had to grow out my hair for my hero costume again?” Mirio supplies accompanied by a very unimpressed head shake.

“Yeahh!!! Totally was. Sorry it just came up and--”

“You were defending my honor? It’s okay Tamaki. I know I looked silly with the long hair” he laughs, humming that rapunzel song everyone sang for the rest of week. You know the one about the lights and the haze--fog lifting? “But I really miss flipping it back and making everyone laugh! Those were my prime days” Mirio snickers tapping his foot to the beat of the Rapunzel song.

“That was pretty funny and I actually like your hair long” I comment, happy to just get the topic flowing into another direction.

“Magi?” Mirio looks up from the plastic bag of food he’s holding and his blue eyes brighten in surprise.

“Well not Rapunmirio long, but like---um--- you know when we were in middle school and you grew it out?” I elaborate, wanting to laugh at his bewildered expression, but also unsure why it’s making my insides squirm and feel too damn warm.

“Rapunmirio! Haha, that’s good! And no way!! I thought everyone said it looked weird” Mirio brushes me off, probably thinking I was being too nice again.

“I don’t think you could ever look weird” is suppose to be a nice compliment to prove to Mirio that I’m being serious. Instead, what comes out of me sounds loaded and like i’ve broken some barrier that no one should ever break between friends. Bros. So, naturally that’s when I decided it’s best for me to never speak ever again.

“Hey guys, they got us the room!” Nejire yells probably making her way down the steps and waving us over.

Still terrified to look up, I keep my head down and stare at Mirio’s white sneakers instead. His feet are brawny and long, mirroring his stocky built that seems to get more pronounced with each passing day. He’s no longer tapping them to any beat, but are still close enough that I think he isn’t too weirded out by me. I can’t really tell for sure without actually looking at his face, which I will never do unless I wanted to die right there.

“Oh c’mon! Stop being so platonically in gay for each other for one second and let’s get this Nobody’s tradition started!!” Yuyu is now yelling as well, making my heart skydive to the bottom of the ground and my stomach feel like it is being compressed into half of its size. Platonically in gay for each other. Oh god, I’m gonna be sick.

“Not to be party pooper or anything because you know I love a good laugh, but I don’t think it’s fair to tease Tamaki about these things” Mirio stuns us into silence and I fight the urge to look up at him.

“It’s definitely making him more distressed than usual and he’s probably questioning everything he’s ever done right now. Him and I are good friends” Mirio wraps his arm around me in a tight one-sided embrace to prove his point, which unfortunately makes me feel infinitely worse. “And it’s kind of weird that we can’t treat each other nicely the way two girls can” he continues and man, I really need to start breathing before I turn purple. And also, wow? Mirio, where did that even come from?

It’s Yuyu’s turn to feel sheepish and I can tell she’s ashamed because she hands Hadou her drink, quickly runs over to us and gives us a full on 90 degree bow. “Oh shit. I’m so sorry! I was always teasing you both, especially you, Tamaki because you get so flustered and it’s absolutely adorable, but I didn’t realize I was going too far... I’m really sorry guys. I know I can be a bit hard on the edges and relentless, but I never ever meant to make you feel weird-awful about it” she slowly straightens her body and meets our gazes. I can tell she feels really shitty about it because her eyes are getting watery, which in the year that I’ve known her has never happened before.

Not comfortable with most people crying in front of me, especially when it comes to girls because well-- I’ve only ever encountered it twice and both times I didn’t really have to do anything. My sister usually throws things or yells at me for looking at her when she’s doing it. Meanwhile Hadou usually cheers herself up before we even need to or Mirio says something witty and she laughs right away. Thus, I am not equip when dealing with women in tears even with both my sister and Hadou as practice or maybe that’s exactly the reason why. Nevertheless, the sight of Yuyu like this is beyond off-putting and I know I have to do something before I cause her anymore distress.

“Hey, don’t be so hard on yourself Yuyu-san. We know you meant no harm” I force myself to look at her without breaking eye contact for five seconds and place my hand on her shoulder.

“Exactly! I just wanted you to know in case you didn’t realize how it was affecting Tamaki. And we’re only human right? We make mistakes and sometimes even to our friends, but we know you and understand that you would never mean it in that way!” Mirio fits both of us soundly in his burly arms and squeezes us in a hug wayyyy too tight and warm. I stretch my arm out to save our drinks in the tray and feel the bag of food brush up against my back.

Yuyu nods her head and Hadou chooses that moment to truly break the rather abrupt turn of events by wind slapping all three of us. “Did I not say no more crying between us???” she shakes her head and Yuyu laughs in between sniffling.

“No. Well, not with me at least and I understand what you guys are saying. I’m just disappointed with myself and how I never considered how you guys felt about it” she says with a small smile. “But thank you Mirio for pointing it out and thank you both for dealing with me. I promise to stop making comments about your friendship! It’s healthy and actually pretty amazing. And yes Nejire, I’ll stop sniffling before you slap us again” she looks at us with a determined glint in her eyes and makes a show of wiping her tears away, so Hadou doesn’t get any ideas.

“Alright!! Let’s get this tradition going and start off the night with the real musical genius of UA, AMAJIKI TAMA--” Mirio announces with vigor and excitement like Present Mic does every Sports Festival, and I turn my head at him in horror. Oh No NO no. I am not singing. My eyes scream at him and he exaggerates the next syllable he’s about to say, while not breaking eye contact with me.

“KI’S BEST FRIEND MIRIOOOOO TOGATA!” he saves, flexing his arms and wiggling his eyebrows at me again. Hadou and Yuyu laugh like they knew he was going to do this all along and I feel extra silly for not seeing that coming.

“Mirio you can’t tell Yuyu to stop teasing me and then do the exact same thing right after” I point out and nudge him with my elbow.

He stops flexing his arms and wraps his left arm around my neck instead. “Roger that, best bro!” he brightens, smile so wide and sunny that my stomach lurches completely winded. Once again, I can’t talk for I fear something excruciatingly embarrassing will come out of my mouth, so I just let him drag me up the stairs and into our room feeling unsettled by how not irritated I actually am.

🎤🎤🎤

Before long, Hadou and Yuyu fuss around with the remote and the speaker settings while Mirio turns on all the disco and strobe lights available. I unpack the aluminum covering our chicken combo and set four plates out along with our chopsticks. I open the lid of our sides, one large white rice, one large fried rice, one large potato wedges and one large macaroni and cheese.

The smell does a glorious thing to all the movement around me, and when I blink my eyes open the three of them huddle along the small table in the room, salivating.

“I know I said I was gonna sing first, but mannnn that chicken smells too damn good to pass on” Mirio takes the seat next to me and takes his chopsticks in hand. Hadou already takes a bite of the potato wedges and Yuyu starts taking some of the fried rice into her plate.

We eat in continued silence, except for the default music that comes with the strobe lights. Yuyu goes out to the front to get us some drinks after we gulped ours down outside due to their ‘no outside drinks policy’ and Mirio takes another huge bite of his third drumstick. Hadou loves cheese and has been munching on the mac and cheese, while I’ve had a little bit of everything.

When Yuyu comes back the guy working at the front comes with her with a large pitcher of soda and plastic cups. Yuyu on the other hand, has four different sets of colored wigs in her hands, a tambourine and sunglasses. Mirio laughs at the sight of the comedian blue wig (completely bald in the middle, but with hair at the sides) and we play Janken (rock paper scissors) to see who will wear what.

We assign the overall winner with the green mohawk wig, then the second place with the neon pink troll wig, the third place with the red pigtails in floating in the air and the last place with the comedian blue wig.

The first round is me vs Yuyu and Hadou vs Mirio. We wipe our hands with the hand sanitizer I bring with me everywhere and then set out to start our mini tournament. I take a deep breath and Yuyu and I start as Mirio and Hadou do the same next to me. After three tries of choosing the same hand, I beat Yuyu’s rock with my paper. Hadou and Mirio play a little longer, but Hadou rises to the challenge and beats Mirio’s scissors with her rock.

Mirio and Yuyu’s shoulders droop down as they realize the mess they’ll have to wear and Hadou and I hi-five each other. The second round ends pretty quickly for both of our teams and I win in the first play beating Hadou’s paper with my scissors. Meanwhile Mirio stumbles in dead last as his scissors get blocked by Yuyu’s rock.

After we finish most of the chicken, we pack the trash into the plastic bag we had the food in, and left the large side of potato wedges and two bits of chicken wings on a spare plate. Hadou busies herself with putting on a bunch of songs and Yuyu sets out to place the comedian blue wig on Mirio. It’s a bit tight and Mirio tries to run away at first, but there’s really nowhere for him to go, especially with Hadou blocking the door, and me and Yuyu holding him down.

I don’t think I’ve ever laugh so much in my life, but Mirio’s half-assed get away and refusal to wear the wig makes it all the more hilarious. I manifest two long chicken wings to trap him because my own arms could never engulf him fully. Yuyu takes that chance to adjust the wig just right, so it hides most of his blonde hair. When she finishes despite Mirio trying to shake her off, we stare at him for 5 seconds before hitting the floor in shock and disbelief. He looks absolutely ridiculous in every possible way and my stomach hurts so bad from laughing at the sight of him.

He tries to flip the blue shoulder length hair getting stuck on his cheeks and Hadou drops the remote from shaking too hard. Mirio turns slightly pink with a particularly goofy smile and when Yuyu hands him a mirror to see what he looks like, he makes a horrified face at his own reflection. We start dying immediately and soon after he joins us on the floor laughing.

Getting Yuyu to put on the red pigtails was not a problem at all, in fact she does it all by herself meanwhile Mirio swings his blue hair back and forth and sings to Barbie girl with the appropriate Ken and Barbie voice. The sight is so funny, I take a video of the whole song despite the small amount of memory I have left on my phone. Then, Yuyu helps Hadou put her long hair in a bun and place the neon pink troll wig on her head. It’s pointless because there’s only so much hair the wig can hide and she ends up leaving her hair down and placing the wig on top.

It’s the most perplexing sight, but Hadou is in her element. She takes the second mic abandoned on the table and tries to belt the notes with Mirio. However, she’s basically screaming with her eyes closed that I can’t actually call it singing. Meanwhile, I just shake the tambourine around, happy to be here and not have to sing at all.

When Yuyu’s favorite song comes on, Mirio hands the mic over to her and her raspy voice gets even raspier when she sings. She gets most of the notes right, which makes Hadou’s screaming less apparent. Mirio takes this time to get the green mohawk wig and arranges it neatly on my head. He’s concentrating so hard with his tongue sticking out at the corner of his lip that I don’t think he’s realize how funny I look.

Hadou finally opening her eyes at the end of the song turns over at us and takes a couple of shots before bursting into a fit of giggles. Yuyu follows suit and Mirio finally looks at me properly and falls back from laughing. I feel the flush suffuse to my cheeks and neck, but for the first time I’m not really embarrassed. I guess this is how Mirio feels when he has successfully made everyone laugh because of some silly thing he did.

“Man we need photos of this! C’mon I’ll put my phone on timer!” Yuyu moves the table aside and stands in front of the couch. She raises her phone, trying to find the best angle that will fit all four of us, while Hadou and Mirio adjust themselves accordingly, so they can be seen and still have room for me to get into the frame.

“OOOh!! Okay this seems to be the best angle. Alright everyone do funny faces!” She calls out and presses the power button which starts the timer at 10 seconds. It blinks 9. 8. 7. I look at Hadou crossing her eyes and sticking out her tongue. Meanwhile, Mirio makes a fishy face with his hands covering his ears and his thumbs sticking out. I glance over at the camera and Yuyu has her mouth slightly ajar as she looks up and has the whites of her eyes peeking out.

3. 2. 1. Not really knowing what to do, I open my mouth wide and stick my head back just in time for the camera to make a loud clicking noise followed by the flash. Yuyu takes the camera down to change the settings of the camera and Hadou laughs at our faces.

“Okay I think we should do 5 seconds this time. Let’s do a rock band pose!” She yells and with that the chaos ensues. Hadou sits on her legs on the couch and does an air guitar pose. Mirio grabs the microphone and screams inaudibly like he’s hit the climactic part of the song. Yuyu uses her right hand to act like she’s smashing on piano keys and I make a run to the grab the chopsticks in the bag, but I don’t make it in time. So, what appears in the photo is a blurry patch of my hair making me seem like I’ve traveled through time. Everyone laughs at my fail and we try a second time with me in the photo this time and pretending to play the drums.

We do a couple more of poses in between actually singing and Mirio keeps us at the edge of our seats when he decides to belt into his favorite rock ballads. Hadou, Yuyu and I share impressed glances as he seriously tackles the intensity of this one particularly heart breaking song. He’s clutching his chest tightly, words hitting close to home and it makes me ache to do something about it. I take my eyes off him, needing a distraction and notice the stray tear Hadou wipes away from her eyes, despite her warning us to stop crying.

His eyes are closed for most of the song, having already memorized each and every word along with all the rifts the original artist makes, and by the time it’s over we clap and cheer so loud, Mirio reddens in the best way.

“HOLY FUCK TOGATA! WHEN THE HECK DID YOU LEARN TO SING LIKE THAT?” Yuyu shakes the tambourine at him and Hadou slaps his arm.

“Forrealll! Maybe you should be the one competing at the beauty contest! You’d definitely win with that kind of talent!” Hadou keeps slapping his arm in excitement and my stomach ties into infinite knots as he chuckles softly and scratches the back of his head, a little shy and embarrassed.

“Oh geez! You guys just want me to flip my hair again!” He jokes to lighten their zeal, but they’re shoving the microphone back into his hands and entering another song into the machine for him to sing.

“ENCORE ENCORE ENCORE!” Hadou and Yuyu harmonize for once and Mirio sits back down next to me, absolutely overwhelmed by their tenacity. But he gives them what they want and soon, we all sing to a bunch of our childhood pop tunes.

Even I find myself singing softly underneath Hadou’s yelling, Yuyu’s raspy rocker voice and Mirio’s spellbinding singing. I know they can hear me because they suddenly have stopped singing so loud, but the lack of comment gives me courage to continue on and share this moment with them.

🦋🦋🦋

We come home late that day because Mirio and I walk Hadou and Yuyu home, both to make sure they’re safe and also to prolong the inevitable family reunion. I know we’re all thinking it, but we pass the time with more teasing and pose reenactments from the earlier karaoke mess. It’s light and funny and by the time Mirio drops me off with another tight hug, I don’t feel as bad as I know I should.

When I open the front door to my house, my family tries their best to act normal. My mom even attempts at scolding me for coming home after curfew, but it sounds forced and like she thinks I’ll break any minute. My dad just silently prepares me some hot tea and my sister keeps her door open in case I want to come in to her room and not be alone.

It’s weird because I know I should feel sad and disappointed, but the me now isn’t really feeling sad at all. All I can think about is how fun it was to sing with the gang and how close we actually have gotten within a year. It’s like we’ve poured all our misery away and there’s nothing left, but all the good memories we made afterwards. But my house feels like it’s 7 hours behind, bringing me back to the time I was still hiding in the classroom and letting my mind get the better of me. Torn between letting it go or letting it sit on my mind, I take a nice long shower and not think about anything at all.

By the time I’m out of the shower, I see all the notifications Yuyu has sent to our group chat and wipe my hair dry before climbing into bed. I click on our chat and a bunch of our group selfies show up. I look at each one and laugh so hard I choke on my own saliva. There’s one with Yuyu, Hadou and Mirio posing like Charlie’s Angels that just melts the last bits of uncertainty in my mind.

Hadou and Mirio send their stolen moments as well and I do the same, checking off the four photos I manage to take. Then, I spot the video of Mirio flipping his hair back and forth to Barbie Girl and the encore love song he sings to appraise Hadou’s dying request. Just thinking about the way he fills each line with such agony and passion makes me feel funny again. But, before I think myself out of it, I press play anyway and fall asleep to the thought of how it would actually feel to be in love.

Part 1 2 3 of 5

I LIVEEE. lol. I know it’s been a hot minute, but I kinda fell into a funk and the first few drafts for this chapter felt too forced to continue. So, I took a break and started doodling around. And before I knew it, the itch to continue the story came and this long chappie was made. As always, I’d love to hear from you guys and hope you enjoy this next installment. Thank you very much and I hope you guys have a wonderful holiday season🎄

#miritama #mirio togata #tamaki amajiki #bnha #mha #mirio x tamaki #mirio #tamaki

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